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#like i have zero interest in having a friend with different political views i tried to deal with it
rogersstevie · 7 months
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i really do think people need to learn that sometimes fighting with people in your life about politics and the like is just not worth it
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tatedowling82 · 2 months
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muffinwalloper · 3 years
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Let's talk about the villain - Cruella De Vil Part II
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The door opens and Cruella steps into the working room. Here, the audience understands that Cruella owns a fashion company which makes sense for her character and explains her infatuation with furs. Here, the audience is shown that her company produces high class fashion that aligns with couture and is possibly only worn by models and celebrities. The whole room is held in grey colours and hard edges with cold light from above. Also, note the painting on top of the entrace: it looks like flames. Cruella is basically stepping through the gates of hell!
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The camera ankle changes once more and shows Cruella from worm's-eye-view. That in combination with her whole appearance makes her look huge and intimidating. The audience still can't see her face, only her jawline and her red lipstick. Her black attire stands out perfectly against the light grey of the room and she literaly walks down the catwalk in the middle of the room while all of her employees are beneath her. Also, this scene worked as an inspiration for Meryl Streeps character Miranada Prestly in The devil wears Prada. Miranda and Cruella are both fashion icons, boss ladies and intimidate their employees with their mere presence. Even though it's more subtle here than in Devil wears Prada, Cruella's employees also act in a rushed way and do their best to look as busy as they can. Also, in contradiction to the men who have greeted her on the street, none of her employees here dares to even look her way. They know that she's here but are so afraid of her that they rush to get back to their work, so she hopefully will just pass them.
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Now, Anita is introduced. Anita seems to be the only one who hasn't noticed Cruella's entrance and is actually busy with work. Cruella steps towards her from behind and in doing so, she slows her pace and moves like a predator stalking it's prey in an attempt to get a glimpse at Anita's work.
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Anita only notices that someone is standing behind her when Cruella is already within arms reach. She then turns and for the first time, Cruella's face is shown to the audience. Cruella, being focused on Anita's work only looks at her then and immediately flashes her a false smile. Glenn Close absolutely nails that smile that doesn't reach her eyes. In a way, it can be viewed as a mere flashing of teeth which fits her whole appearance along with her fashion choices that indicate that she's some kind of predator (more than that in part III). So, she gives Anita that broad smile after having creeped up from behind and greets her (her first line in the movie): "Anita, darling." Not only has she never so much as looked at one of her employees before, much less greeted them but she openly smiles at Anita and steps right into her space in an almost familiar way. From all that the audience has seen so far they realise that Cruella uses people to her advantage. So, when she steps up to Anita and greets her in a friendly manner, the audience knows that she must have something that Cruella wants.
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In this scene, the audience learns that Anita does indeed have something that Cruella wants - talent. Cruella tells Anita that much later in her office and is clearly struck by Anita's last work. In the original, Cruella's idea to make a coat out of puppies comes to her when she visits Anita and Roger and meets the dogs for the first time. In this version, the idea is presented to her by Anita who used her dog's (Perdita) spots as an inspiration for a design idea. As Anita explains the idea to Cruella, she steps even closer and runs her hand along Anita's sketches as well as the photos of Perdita. Here, it's established that Cruella, whenever she sees something that catches her interest, reaches out for it to grab it. She's a woman who is used to get whatever she wants because she simply takes it. That much is shown again later when she tries to buy the newborn puppies of Anita and Roger and they decline. Cruella reacts with a bone deep rage, calls Anita insane (when clearly she's the insane one) and fires her. Obviously, nobody has ever dared to say no to her before and even if someone might have hesitated to give her what she wanted, Cruella seems to always have gotten her way with money. When she fails to buy the puppies, she's put in a position that she is unfamiliar with and reacts with force (stealing them).
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Now for the way, Cruella interacts with her employees. After having seen Anita's ideas she invites her into her office. They are followed by Frederick, her head of designs. Whereas she was nice to Anita she treats Frederick with the same arrogance as she did the Portier. At first she doesn't look at him and when she does, she doesn't change her position but makes him change his to look at her. Whereas she stands in a comfortable position, Frederick leans to his left side, cranes his neck and lowers his chin to be on one level with her. She makes him cower in front of her whereas she stands tall. She's managed to look down on him despite their obvious difference in height. Also, note how she keeps him pinned with her gaze while his eyes stray towards the side or the ground again and again, avoiding direct eye contact. Another point is their conversation which makes the hierarchy clear to everyone who hasn't got it yet:
C.: "Do you like spots, Frederick?"
F.: "Oh, I don't believe so, Madame. I thought we liked stripes this year."
C.: "What kind of sycophant are you?"
F.: "What kind of sycophant would you like me to be?"
I mean, he's practically asking her to step on him even more. Frederick, even though meant as a caricature sums up perfectly what kind of boss Cruella is and contrasts the way she speaks to Anita. Cruella wants Anita to share her ideas with her and does everything she can to lure her in. She invades her personal space from the beginning, acts like a friend. She speaks to her in a friendly manner with a calm voice whereas she snaps at every other employee. She invites her to her office, makes her sit down, offers her a drink and tries everything to make her comfortable while Anita is clearly uncomfortable with the way Cruella treats everyone else. However, being a rather shy nature, Anita would never voice her discomfort to her boss and tries to smile it away politely. Even when Cruella commands Alsonso around right in front of her, she doesn't say anything although she clearly feels sorry for him. In her interaction with Alonso also lies another layer of Cruella's character. To her, Alsonso is the lowest being in her orbit. She has zero patience with him and expects him to run at her very command, she's offended when he doesn't catch her meaning immediately. At that point, I'm wondering if she even paid the poor man. Cruella is portayed as a spinster and man hater in general. Be it Roger, Alonso, Skinner, Horrace or Jasper. All she does is ordering them around harshly while at the same time looking down on them.
To sum up, in my opinion THIS is how you introduce a villain in a movie! It's perfection!
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zeldasayer · 4 years
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I transcribed and translated Pedro’s interview from GQ Germany for all of us. I tried translating as good as possible but bear with me, English is not my mother tongue. By @sixties-loser
Pedro Pascal, the star from “Game of Thrones”, “Wonder Woman” and “The Mandalorian” talks about becoming an adult, film, fashion, corona – and a painful surgery in the exclusive GQ interview.
It seems almost eerie how empty the streets of LA are in the sunshine. Meanwhile a new normality seems to be coming to Europe, most people in L.A. are still cutting their own hair. Many have not seen their friends for half a year. The pandemic is out of control. The reaction towards it too. Inviting someone into their garden for a “distance drink” can cause the same distress as suggesting to switch spouses.
Therefore, it was particularly surprising that Pedro Pascal immediately accepted. He accepted the drink, not to switch spouses. He is one of the rising stars and newcomers this year – if it wasn’t for corona sending the whole film industry into a forced vacation, there would most likely not have been time for said drink. After having his skull crushed in “Game of Thrones” followed the lead role as a DEA agent hunting Pablo Escobar in “Narcos” in 2015 and now he is stepping towards big Hollywood films. From the 1st of October onwards the Chilean-born actor will be starring in the blockbuster “Wonder Woman 1984”. Moreover, the second season of the “Star Wars”-series “The Mandalorian” on Disney+ starring him as the lead is going to air in October this year – but he will be underneath a helmet. Well, we all are under a helmet in 2020 in one way or another. We want to meet the man who a few years ago still worked as a waiter in New York, whose parents were political refugees who found asylum in Denmark and settled in Texas and whose son one day signed up for a theatre group in High School.
Then, the cancellation! While we were in the middle of fixing up the house and the garden for the drink with Pedro and organizing the fashion shoot, which was not easy considering the safety measures in L.A., his management called with an unfortunate message: Pedro – no, not sick with corona – had to get emergency surgery because of a damaged tooth and was lying in bed with a swollen face that was hindering him from speaking and taking pictures. The sun is shining onto empty streets. And our empty garden.
A few days later he nonetheless arrived at our front door without a swollen face but still with threads in his mouth. He was not chauffeured by a limo-service but he came with his own car – he even picked up his make-up artist. He is helping her carrying all of her utensils into the house and declares: “I’ve got time today!”. What a celebrity! It seemed like we did not want to ask him how he made it to the A-List of Hollywood but he wanted to ask us how we made it to the A-list. Pedro Pascal! Yes, what kind of a celebrity?
Pedro Pascal: Sorry for messing with your plans. The surgery was an emergency.
GQ: Really? We were wondering whether the swelling wasn’t the product of a secret visit to the plastic-surgeon. Apparently, they are drowning in work because of the quarantine in Hollywood.
PP: I have to disappoint you. A few days before our appointment I was rushing to the hospital with a fractured tooth and the worst pain in my entire life – a hospital in which treats people with severe cases of corona. I was unable to reach any dentist! Right in front of the parking lot a specialist called me back. The pain was hell despite the ten injections I got. The doctor said I was not an exception because a lot of people are grinding their teeth because of all the stress.
GQ: What are you most afraid of at the moment?
PP: How the government is handling the pandemic is worrying me more than the virus itself. This shortage of intelligent management of the crisis is a moral shame. The leadership crisis in this country is turning us all into orphans – destitute and abandoned.
GQ: How did you spend your time over the last few months?
PP: I spent it with frozen pizza and sweatpants in Venice Beach. I live in a rear house that’s in a family’s garden. Actually, there are a lot of good takeout places nearby but for some reason I just love pepperoni pizza from the supermarket.
GQ: That does not really sound like movie star-lifestyle. What does it feel like being suddenly stopped from top speed to zero?
PP: Regarding what is going on around the world one should hold back one’s own mental turmoil. I would be lying if I was saying that I am not disappointed. The whole team put a lot of heart and work into the production of “Wonder Woman 1984”. We had a lot of fun on set. I wished to travel around the world and introduce the film with the same lively energy.
GQ: You come from a politically engaged, socialist family that fled from the Pinochet-regime in Chile. What do you remember from that time?
PP: My sister and I were born in Chile but I was only nine months old when we first found asylum in Denmark. From there we quickly came to San Antonio in Texas where my dad started working as a doctor at the university clinic.
GQ: Texas is not known as a socialist utopia. How did you assimilate?
PP: San Antonio is not a Cowboy-town but very diverse with big Asian, black and Latino communities. I remember it as a romantic place, culturally open. The culture shock only came as we later moved to range county in California. There the atmosphere was suddenly white, preppy and conservative.
GQ: How were you received in California?
PP: I’m still ashamed of the fact that I did not correct my classmates when they kept on calling me Peter. I am Pedro. Even if I didn’t grow up in Chile the country and the language are still a part of me. I was very unhappy in that environment. However, I was fortunately able to go to another school close to Long Beach where I felt more comfortable. Through the theater group at that school I found my way.
GQ: Were you able to visit Chile as a child?
PP: Yes, when my parents made it to the list of expatriates that were able to travel to Chile without consequences. First, there was a big family reunion and then my sister and I stayed there for a few months with relatives while my parents went back to Texas. They likely needed a break from us. They got us when they were very young, had a buzzing social life and my mother was obtaining a PhD in psychology.
GQ: Was your mother a typical young psychologist who wanted to apply her theoretical knowledge at home?
PP: You mean, whether I was her guinea pig? For sure! I remember strange tests and sittings that were disguised as games where someone was watching me react to different toys. I cannot have been older than six but I was already aware of the dynamic. My favourite thing was being questioned about my dreams. That was a wonderful opportunity to come up with fantastic stories.
GQ: Was that your first performance?
PP: Of course! My mother worried about my strong imagination because I was living in my own fantasy world rather than reality. I hated going to school. I was always categorized as the troublemaker. At one point, the topics at school became more interesting and my grades also went up. There are so many kids that are unnecessarily diagnosed with learning disabilities without considering that school can be abhorrent. Why is it so accepted to be bored in class when there are so many stimulating ways to convey knowledge?
GQ: Considering al that has happened this summer around the world: Do you believe that we can seriously demand social change now?
PP: I Hope so. After lockdown, the first time I went out was to protest for “Black Lives Matter” on the streets. The energy was peaceful and hopeful until the police provoked severe conflicts. Nevertheless, we cannot run from problems like we used to this time and we cannot distract ourselves from them either. It seems like the pressure of the pandemic led to a new clarity: We cannot go on this way.
GQ: The “Wonder Woman 1984” Trailer revives the optimism of the 1980’s. From today’s point of view, it seems almost nostalgic.
PP: That’s right. You really are happy for two hours. The director Patty Jenkins created a film full of positive messages. We shot in Washington D.C., then in London and Spain – this sounds like I am talking of a past time.
GQ: Do you miss traveling?
PP: I’m just now realizing the privilege of just packing up one’s stuff and being able to fly anywhere. An American passport used to guarantee unlimited travel. And that’s why it the small radius of our lives is actually unimaginable. Over the last years I often retreated for a break after shootings because I was constantly on the move and overstimulated. My friends were already complaining I had become too comfortable. We all took social contact for granted and are only realizing now how dependent we actually are on human contact. Over the last weeks I often longingly thought about all the parties and dinner invitations I declined.
GQ: In L.A. people spend more time at home or nature than in other metropolises that are more geared towards public life. Could this city become your second home after New York?
PP: My Real Home are my friends. I have been a nomad since I was little and I do not have a place where I have put down roots. Up until not long ago my physical home was a place in between departure and arrival. Therefore, it was something I did not want to complicate through the accumulation of stuff. On the contrary: Without having read Marie Kondo’s book I have freed myself from excess baggage over the last few years and I lived relatively minimally.
GQ: Is there nothing you collect or something you just can’t throw away?
PP: Books! I even still have the literature I read when I was a teenager and when I was in college. Recently, I stumbled upon a box full of old theatre manuscripts and materials from my time at the New York University. I also cannot part from art easily, just like I cannot part from lamps or old photos. On the other hand, I can easily get rid of furniture and clothes.
GQ: Do you remember roles that were really only completely defined through the costume?
PP: Yes, I am particularly thinking about “Game of Thrones”. At that time I understood for the first time what it meant to be supported by a look. This is thanks to the costume designer Michele Clapton. She created very feminine robes and brocade coats for my character that nevertheless looked masculine when worn and I felt very sexy in them. Of course, Lindy Hemmings power-suits and Jan Swells bleached hairstyle for the tycoon-villain in “Wonder Woman 1984” were very important as well. At first I did not really see myself in the role because the cuts and colors of the 80s do not really fit my body. I’m more the 70s type.
GQ: Do you incorporate those inspirations into your personal wardrobe?
PP: In my free time I choose comfort over a cool look these days. Sometimes I miss the times when I expressed myself through a certain style. It is hard to imagine that I went to Raves as a teenage in the 90s; I was a real club kid with ridiculous outfits: overalls, balloon pants, football shirts and a top hat, like in Dr.Seuss’s “Cat in a Hat”. Later in New York I was hanging out with a group of people that felt it was very important to have a certain style. The fact that I am basically only wearing sweatpants everyday is actually tragic.
GQ: whoever plays roles in comic book adaptations becomes a bodybuilder and eats ten chicken breasts a day. You don’t?
PP:My body would not agree with that. It is hard enough to stay in shape normally. When you’re in your mid-forties you have to live with a lot more discipline. Up until before my tooth-incident I worked out with a trainer in my garden multiple times a week to keep the quarantine body in check.
GQ: Apart from the personal trainer, are you in a steady relationship?
PP: I am not ready for that yet. Maybe at some point I will be but until then I’ll let it be. I can’t even offer you absurd corona dating stories.
GQ: What would annoy you the most if you were your own roommate?
PP: I can be quite controlling. I have to conjure all my humanity to prevent myself from going through my entire film collection. When I don’t want something I cannot keep it to myself or be passive-aggressive, I always have to take it to the frontlines. Other than that, I tend to have tunnel view: when I am not feeling well I cannot imagine to ever feel better again. I have trouble relativizing my emotions or to wave off problems. Method-acting would really not be for me. This is why I try to only work on projects that feel good, where there is mutual support and encouragement.
GQ: When we were trying on the clothes earlier you spoke of a lack of self-confidence. How does that get along with a career like yours?
PP: Isn’t it interesting how these characteristics and circumstamces relate? Self-worth comes from inside but it is also influenced by what society values because we often internalise the public gaze. I have lived in New York for 20 years, I studied there and made a living by working as a waiter until my mid-thirties because the theatre and film jobs I got did not pay the bills. There were so many times I was almost there. The disappointment of having missed the perfect role or opportunity by a hair’s width can be crushing. When should you give up and what is plan B? That is a question that is not only on many actors‘s minds but also on many others minds who struggle for a living – no matter how much potential they have or how close they seem to be to the top. We are seeing now how our narrow definition of success destroys society. At the same time, we are realizing that where we come from and the color of our skin still decide whether we can exist with dignity.
GQ: What are the positive aspects of a relatively late success as leading-man?
PP: I feel like I can decide over my own life without the pressure of having to accept projects or to have to present a certain identity on social media. This is for sure also because I am a man. Regardless of age, Women have to try harder to stand out.
GQ: Life always consists of risk management – now more than usual. For what would you risk losing something?
PP: Generally, when you never risk something you might never get ahead. That is for friendship, love, work and creativity. I have to be ready to take risks for the things that really matter to you.
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indigosprite · 3 years
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In another ask, you shared your thoughts on why you didn’t like 6996 etc. do you think 2795 share the same problem? I think while Tsuna and Kyoko doesn’t seem as weird as 6996 on the surface upon further speculation and reading works where Kyoko becomes this bamf vongola tenth wife who does anything for Tsuna, it sort of treads the same vibe as Chrome and Mukuro in some way. Idk I just want to hear your thoughts on maybe 2795 and maybe 2786 as well.
Hi hi
Had to search these because I literally did not have any ships for this show until I rewatched it and just merged my favorite characters into one pair that happened to be a ship. I  forget the others exist...With that being said, take this with a grain of salt because I honestly don’t even think about these ships a lot, forget they even exist. How KHR was written will always make the the very idea of Tsuna with any of the female characters feel weird or odd unless you’ve managed to read or create enough Fanon that changes your characterization of the original dynamic. I don’t think they share the same problem but maybe a similar one ? Tsuna and any female character compared to Mukuro and Chrome is very different in my opinion. (funnily enough it’s also because Mukuro isn’t a misogynist shsjsjsj) 6996 could work, they actually have a relationship that’s very personal to both parties and unlike 2795 they’re both aware of it and have a distinct unique connection with each other that consists of shared interests trust and mutual respect. it’s just odd to think about because chrome looks up to Mukuro and the power imbalance feels weird, he’s literally keeping her alive. (Which I know is disgustingly sweet I find it very heartwarming. )
2795 is this one sided crush with zero redeeming qualities. There was nothing remotely romantic or intriguing happening between Tsuna and Kyoko the entire series. If we took out Tsuna’s inner thoughts we honestly would’ve thought she was just this nice girl he knows from school. If we took out Tsuna’s thoughts in general and left it up to the fandom pulling this ship out of their butts it would honestly be 1000% cuter. All their interactions read like
“this girl is so lovely I really like her and she’s talking to me that’s amazing”
“Thanks for the pencil. Do your best on the test okay?”
I’m not swooning over the most lackluster interactions on the planet because he is over romanticizing it. Even the reason why he likes her is not that interesting or convincing. Which I mean I get it he’s only 14 he’s not thinking about all the small stuff like emotional support or validation or like not wanting to be alone etc. It’s still just you’re pretty let’s be happy all the time while you hold my hand forever. He deserves that he’s literally a kid. but even when i was younger i didn’t see it between them ever. On top of their interactions being boring they never give us things that make you go “oh wait she might actually like him hmmm” . they could have tried a little harder to make it a little more romantic? sometimes they show us Kyoko in a pink background hands clasped surrounded by hearts and I forget she’s supposed to be viewed in that light. I forget we’re supposed to actually consider her liking him too but what are we supposed to think Kyoko is looking for in a guy that makes Tsuna a possibility when she doesn't exist past eating cake and worrying about her brother and Tsuna. I think it’s also fair to note that they never imply that Tsuna actually thinks about her beyond his image of her but we see how caring he is with his friends to the point where he can point out their flaws and work through them anyways and accept them. Tsuna realizing Yamamoto was not himself during the Guardians trial is a perfect example of this, it establishes the relationship they built with one another. another example is Tsuna acknowledging that Gokudera is overwhelming and short tempered but he wouldn’t trade the guy for anyone because he is loyal and a good friend.  he cares for Kyoko as a person in general but he never reaches that depth when it comes to her. he doesn’t have to either because it’s just a crush, how you manage to take that through the next ten years of his life I honestly don’t know. 
TL;DR : My ONLY problem with 2795 is the fact that there is nothing to work off of but the implication that Tsuna likes this girl and that’s why they are endgame. she matters very little, just a figurehead of his normalcy. she’s written just as badly in fics, can I blame you? no you were probably like 14 writing them. do a lot of people still do this ? yeah so i’m just not interested until the fanon has changed her character for everyone. 
I know I sound super hypocritical because “Sprite what the fuck does 6918 have that’s soooo intriguing they actually canonically hate each other how is that any better.” the answer: Mukuro and Hibari have a more established relationship with mutual feelings than those two, even better they’re actually really strong feelings (of pure hatred). Bonus, despite being aloof both characters also have fully developed personalities and Opinions/Behaviors that we can mold however we please. they actually have a relationship to play around with that's what makes it fun and lets you have those “actually they’re pretty similar in this aspect” because you know shit about both of them individually. 
Now for 2786,,, as i sit here and think about it Haru and Tsuna make so much more sense for all the reasons him and kyoko don’t . 
Kyoko and Haru were already made solely to be Tsuna’s love interests (specifically Kyoko) , but then it went on to be something they didn’t even bother hiding when they reduced their characters and their interests to looking after kids and repeatedly worrying over Tsuna. The reason I don’t find it appealing is because there really wasn’t any dynamic there at all. This boy liked this girl and that’s literally all it was. She has no depth , and despite being written for him nothing about Kyoko screams you’re perfect for this kid. Nothing says, You’re compatible, You have common interests, you two can rely on each other. She was pretty and nice and polite and that’s all they shared along with half the cast. With Haru they went the completely opposite direction, this girl likes him and is upfront about it. she's not a better candidate just because she's not the typical pretty girl whos quiet and polite and caring,(She’s not the better written female character either, this is reborn. they all lose here.) she’s the better candidate because we actually have a personality to compare to Tuna's. she was purposely given this big personality because he was never going to be in love with her because she’s like all the other intruding figures of his life. Again we have this one sided crush, know he doesn’t like her at all but you can actually see where they do go right and wrong. she’s a complete person. 
Haru can handle a little wild in her life, she was the first one to know he would be a mafia boss and it didn’t phase her at all. Tsuna might need that later in life.
In the future when Tsuna finds her crying she tells him not to think her feelings have anything to do with him, completely different dynamic from kyoko whos emotions are always directly related to male characters and what they are doing. 
Haru and her cosplays are so perfectly absurd and she does not care how weird he finds them, she has this big embarrassing trait to her that Tsuna comically responds to but just grows to overlook and accept.  
she actually talks to Tsuna quite a lot and helps him out whenever she can, because he doesn't like her she's allowed to actually exist in his world and he sees her fully because of it. It makes sense to see his significant other who will be involved in the mafia as an asset who he wants to protect and not just...something he needs to protect bc they honestly don't want this.
she interviews the entire cast of the show because haru just fits there, in a yamamoto like way, she can just handle it. 
Tsuna and Haru could have been perfect friends or a couple. they had the grounds for it. it’s just not what he wanted but I can totally see them working out for each other later in life. they make so much sense! i’ll have to think about them more sometime soon. 
Hope I answered you questions, this got long.
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nutty1005 · 4 years
Text
Xiao Zhan – Beijing Beijing
Translator’s Note: This article comes from PEOPLE Magazine 2020 2nd Issue.
In between “seems beautiful” and “very beautiful”, there can be one or many different views. For example, the phrase “famous after a battle” (TN: Xiao Zhan’s “Zhan” sounds like battle in Chinese), we could analyze the keywords in many ways.
Xiao Zhan, born 1991. Could you imagine how you and I would be when we were 28? Xiao Zhan is like this –
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Fan View
“His looks are totally my type” “As warm and gentle as jade, a gentleman who is peerless” “A precious boy with the soul as crystalline as prismatic glass”
“Famous after a battle”, is the most effective “wartime story”. Using this analogy in the entertainment business, there are many who had been battling for quite a while. Xiao Zhan is like this as well…
Audience View
The summer of 2019, the antihero Wei Wuxian (portrayed by Xiao Zhan), came from “The Untamed” into the living rooms of countless viewers, and straight into their hearts;
Platform View
As the Beijing TV Spring Night Spokesperson, as a celebrity with more than 20 million fans on Weibo, as Tencent’s “Most Popular Artist of 2019” and “Drama Actor of the Year”, as iQiyi’s “Breakthrough Popularity Actor of the Year”…
When we change our point of view, will the world become more interesting?
With regards to his looks, Xiao Zhan said he is “ordinary”, and only scored himself a 6.
With regards to his age, Xiao Zhan said his mother’s method of urging him to start a family has went from straight-to-the-point to indirect and tactful.
With regards to “famous after one battle”, is it really as straightforward as standing out from the big data and being ahead of everyone else? Xiao Zhan, who is 1.83m, reduced his weight from 70kg to 58kg for his outstanding portrayal of Wei Wuxian – is this really the result of a day’s work? Does anyone remember the hardworking youth, with a caption “Designer from Chongqing”, from the 2015 idol search variety show “X-Fire”? Does anyone remember that in 2016, after debuting as the lead singer for X9, Xiao Zhan admitted that there were instances of zero income, zero entertainment and zero social activities?
No matter whether it was “very beautiful” or it “seemed beautiful”, would it be free of worries?
Xiao Zhan looked down and smiled, slightly bashful, his expression serene, “Sweet worries.”
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He actually loves Beijing so much
On 28 Feb 2019, I (a reporter) entered a dressing room in Beijing TV. The narrow and long dressing room had been split in the middle into two narrower sections. Near the corner, after the staff has dispersed, I finally set my eyes on Xiao Zhan, who sat obediently on a chair while styling his hair.
The stylist stood on the right of Xiao Zhan; to the left of Xiao Zhan was a giant suitcase. After we tried to push the suitcase aside, I managed to stand in the gap. In such a tight space, I could only put the phone in front of Xiao Zhan, on top of the opened makeup case, for voice recording. After some more effort from everyone, there was finally space for the phone.
He was covered in a white hairdresser cape, his long legs enveloped by a pair of black pants – his thick black hair was being kept in order, his handsome side profile, relaxed and natural attitude, polite words, and after some close observation, no piercings on his ears.
How did this unguarded Xiao Zhan look like?
There was no need for exquisite words, just simple and pure wonderfulness.
If it remained unimaginable, it would not be too complex to imagine the warm smiles of the good looking youths on the streets of Beijing. All of these people could have been born in Beijing or traveled to Beijing from their hometowns.
“Chongqinger” Xiao Zhan said, “Beijing, in fact, besides my hometown Chongqing, is my longest lived in city. If we use 2020 to calculate, it would have been 5 years. Beijing, is a striving city, and like any other youths, Beijing means dreams and endeavors to us – this is a city of ambition. Hence, as Beijing TV’s Spring Night spokesperson, I feel that this special meaning, I’m very happy and very excited.”
Indeed, during the release conference in the afternoon, when being asked about how he felt spending his “Year of the Rat” Spring Night with Beijing TV, and expressing that by singing, Xiao Zhan, who was nicknamed “The Little Chinese Music Archive”, thought about it seriously and suddenly sang, “I’m beautiful, beautiful, beautiful……”
Haha, this quick wit and humor was almost as cute as “The Chipmunks”.
Spring Night is a big event, and it required absolute secrecy. We secretly asked Xiao Zhan about Beijing TV Spring Night from his personal point of view. Xiao Zhan continued to be witty, “I feel it’ll be exciting, at least I’ll be performing with a… senior that I really like.” When asked who it would be, Xiao Zhan smiled, “Let’s keep it a mystery, and we welcome everyone to watch Beijing TV Spring Night!”
This “Chongqinger”, who still could not confirm if he could return to his hometown for Chinese New Year, would sometimes show his inner thoughts – “If I could go back I definitely would”, but yet his words lingered on Beijing TV Spring Night.
Xiao Zhan, he actually loves Beijing so much.
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He actually likes Zhou Xun so much
Who are the actors that Xiao Zhan admires the most? If he were to pick two, it would be Zhou Xun and Tony Leung.
Xiao Zhan said, “I really like Zhou Xun, her views, her experiences, are all mesmerizing to me. She has many performances that give me the urge to rush into the screen to rescue her. Her performances are very vivacious, it feels like you’re beside her experiencing her performances with her, my attention is all on her, she just has great charisma.”
Xiao Zhan emphasized that he liked Zhou Xun all along, and as we stood and studied his side profile, his face, we suddenly remembered a classic scene from “Palace of Desire”, where the young Princess Taiping removed Xue Shao’s mask.
That year, Zhou Xun was 26, Winston Chao was 40, but it did not prevent her from portraying a young girl’s infatuation. This drama was almost 20 years old, and the female audiences at that time would exclaim that Winston Chao was “as warm and gentle as jade, a gentleman who is peerless”. If this seemed familiar, this phrase was also used by many of Xiao Zhan’s fans to describe him.
Time, in the long river of ages, cycles endlessly Memories, in our past and present lives, crosses endlessly
– Lyrics from “Yu Nian”
This is the lyrics from Xiao Zhan’s song “Yu Nian”, which is the ending song for “Joy of Life”. Who knew that time cycles? Who knew that memories crosses paths?
As of now, Xiao Zhan is similar in age to Zhou Xun’s age then. If we could time travel and Xiao Zhan were to act as Xue Shao, could we guess the ending?
And since we are at this point, we could add another statement – “Traffic” / “Celebrity” / “Actor” – what difference do they make in the face of time? If there are no answers, why not listen to Xiao Zhan’s “Yu Nian”.
Time will tell, it is just that we are too impatient – regardless of our need for speed, we still ought to seek the truth.
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He actually admires Vincent van Gogh so much
Xiao Zhan, like many of us, went through the tough period of studying overnight for university entry examinations. He became a student of Chongqing Business and Technology University, majoring in Design. However, this did not prevent Xiao Zhan from becoming a “Top 10 Inter-school Singer”, he self mockingly called himself a “literary enthusiast”, but in fact became one of the stars in many girls’ eyes – someone who was good looking, tall, stylish and could sing and take photographs. Immediately after he graduated, he became a designer, but he would still be brought up by his ex-teachers, one of whom recommended him to participate in “X-Fire”.
When reviewing “X-Fire”, you would realize that Xiao Zhan had a round face, an obedient expression and mild temperament – in fact, you would think that he did not pose much of a threat. But as one by one, the youths started getting eliminated, as their teams were getting regrouped, as they were getting more and more difficult tasks, it seemed as though Xiao Zhan was being sculpted on the spot – his face became more chiselled, he started slimming down, his eyes started having the steady gaze of ambition… Talent search variety shows are, in fact, cruel and all the participants were getting re-sculpted and remodeled – whatever that was removed was not the meant to be in the final product.
So what did Xiao Zhan keep in his heart? These were all the passwords to his past – drawing, design and art. Like anyone who learnt design, they all had an artist that they favored, and they were all different. Xiao Zhan’s answer – Vincent van Gogh.
Xiao Zhan said, “I was asked previously – if I could have a conversation with a past personality, who would it be? I would just choose Vincent van Gogh, because I want to listen to what he had experienced then, how he lived then, such that he was able to create such a beautiful world and paintings. Such as “Starry Night” or “Self Portrait”, I feel that he was able to step away from himself, into very amazing angles, and then create them.”
Those who learned design would usually be able to draw quite well, and usually beyond the levels of self taught hobbyists. Hence, these would also become part of his self cultivation.
Xiao Zhan confirmed this, “Yes, I think starting from aesthetic views to detailed observation, I feel that there were definitely influences.”
On whether Xiao Zhan still went to art exhibitions, the question seemed like a luxury to him – his eyes widened, he straightened himself, and he started smiling widely, “There is very little time now for art exhibitions, I would see them via friends who went and posted in their social media, or those art-related media accounts.”
There could be no burden I could sway my head I could stay my steps I could surrender to you
– Lyrics from “Two Tigers”
This is the promotion song from movie “Two Tigers” sung by Xiao Zhan. There was once in a variety show that he was requested to use his facial muscles to move a cookie on the side of his face into his mouth, while singing. Before the game started, Xiao Zhan pointed at the camera and laughed, “I really do have an idol’s image burden! I really do have an idol’s image burden!” However, after the game started, you see no sign of his “burden”, just 100% into moving his facial muscles, working hard to get to the cookie.
What is an idol’s image burden? Is there art in an idol’s image burden? There are no answers, but we can look for it in Xiao Zhan’s “Two Tigers”.
Art often gave the answers to philosophy. For example, an idol’s image burden could be thrown away, hence it is definitely not art; Art follows the heartbeat, follows life, just like the Vincent van Gogh, a man whose life bloomed and withered like the summer flowers, in the hearts of people like Xiao Zhan.
This phrase “A designer who can’t sing isn’t a good actor” seemed nonsensical, but if you think about it, it seemed to suit Xiao Zhan a lot.
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He actually yearns the audiences’ recognition so much
It seemed like Xiao Zhan did gain fame after a single battle, but it was not just one battle – there were more raging battles before then.
The dancing spirit, wearing bright red and green clothes, in “Monster Hunt 2” – the camera panned past him without a HD shot; The minor role of a special agent in “The Rookies” – with some onscreen time less than a minute… And there were more, such as “Star Academy”, “Oh! My Emperor”, “Battle Through the Heaven”, “Shuttle Love Millennium”… Never heard of them? Eh, well this proved a problem – how could there be so many people who became “famous after a battle”?
What next? Xiao Zhan happily shared, “If everything goes well, there would be three roles coming to meet everyone, two period, one modern.”
Alright, the modern role would be Doctor Gu of “Oath of Love”. In fact, there were already naughty fans yelling that they were going to register for Doctor Gu’s hospital. Two period roles from “Douluo Continent” and “The Wolf”. Which do Xiao Zhan like the most? Xiao Zhan was unable to answer, “I feel like I like them all. Three different roles, three different pace!”
So, for the audiences who are already familiar with the two roles from “Joy of Life” and “The Untamed”, which are the ones that are closest to Xiao Zhan himself?
Xiao Zhan shook his head, “They weren’t quite similar to me.”
With regards to his roles, his works, let us get to some quick Q&A.
Q: After experiencing the life of the role, would that some what affect yourself? A: I feel that there are some influences to my usual personality.
Q: Would it make you mature faster? A: I feel that it makes my life richer, it means that I have experienced multiple different lives.
Q: What is your long term goal as an actor? A: If we are talking about long term goal, it is definitely being able to act in a drama that I love, and then gain audiences’ recognition for that. I feel that this is my ultimate term goal.
Q: Which role do you like? How do you live with your roles? A: I feel that there isn’t the most loved, I’m just someone who enjoys the moment. For example, when I’m in the current role, I will invest myself entirely into that role, and then I will cherish him and love him. But when I have to go to my next battle, I will put him down and let him go. And then, I will invest all of my passion for the next one.
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He actually likes to smile so much
Observing Xiao Zhan up close and personal – his head narrow, his face small and firm, the folded long legs were especially straight and long. Xiao Zhan, is really thin.
When asked if he was at his thinnest, Xiao Zhan smiled, “No, I was the lightest during ‘The Untamed’, it was shot with ‘Joy of Life’, that was the period. I feel like I’ve regained more than what I’ve lost.”
Wei Wuxian in “The Untamed” liked to smile, all the time, everywhere; Yan Bingyun in “Joy of Life” was cold, all the time, as cold as ice. These two roles shot at the same time, just the emotions were already poles apart – the effort in switching in between them definitely exhausted a lot of brain cells.
When asked if he remembered his longest working day ever since his debut, Xiao Zhan looked down and smiled, then exclaimed at the same time with me, “A few days!”
Whether he could mentally sustain the current pace was not the main point – whether he could physically sustain was hotly debated. On this, Xiao Zhan replied especially fast, “I could adjust to it, really! I personally preferred a busier schedule, the feeling of being busy, makes me feel more fulfilling, and more sense of security.”
“Sense of security” – Xiao Zhan used this phrase, how did he understand it?
For example, Xiao Zhan said that there were instances of him in bad temper, and then he was asked if he would flip tables. Xiao Zhan was slightly taken aback, and answered with a smile, “I can see that you’ve never done design, a designer is a contractor working for his clients, if the clients have opinions, you need to communicate properly and slowly convince them…”
Everyone has a different understanding and adaptation when it comes to “bad temper”, a lot of it came from experience and self control of emotions – similarly, our understanding and adaptation of “sense of security” would be different as well, because everyone’s sense of responsibility and experiences would be different. For a youth to openly bring up “sense of security” and fight for that, we could only choose to give him our blessings. Because, in the blur of the mind, we could almost see ourselves in him.
Before I could give him my well wishes, Xiao Zhan gave the readers and audiences an especially down-to-earth and warm blessing, “I feel that more well wishes are repeated too often. I will simply wish everyone a smooth path ahead, and then peace and safety would be nice!”
Finally, we would emphasize one point – Xiao Zhan really likes to smile!
Moreover, Xiao Zhan’s smiles are varied – there is gentle, healing, mischievous, surprising, confident, hearty, shy, embarrassed… and every one of these smiles could be extended into a language of its own.
There is this saying about a child who likes to smile…
His luck will never be lacking.
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lnterjection · 3 years
Text
Regarding canon!Techon, VoS!Techno, and anarchy
Someone told me the way Techno’s anarchy ideals were presented in Chapter 34 of Valley of Serenity (wherein he admitted “I can want anarchy to be the predominant reality because it benefits me the most while also understanding that it would not be the best thing for most other people”) were, to quote - “All wrong here. Have you watched any of the syndicate streams? Cuz its clear techno actually believes in anarchy and that it's good for people. I understand he's missing some of the development from post pogtopia to the syndicate due to this being canon divergent, but that doesn't change the fact he's always actually believed in his anarchist ideals.”
Now, while I hadn’t considered this specifically before writing the chapter, I had considered enough of the factors surrounding Techno’s characterization in both canon and Valley of Serenity to respond with this:
Ironically, Techno's lore streams are the only ones that I've consistently watched. He's literally the only person where I've watched every bit of lore he's streamed.
And I came to this mindset for Techno in this fic specifically because I believe the events after Nov 16 in canon, of the Butcher Army, the Community House debacle with Tommy betraying him, and Doomsday were huge influences in how much he believes in the good of anarchy for the common person. Remember, he was willing to retire and let go of the whole anarchy thing to live in peace for a while, after seeing the disaster that was Nov 16th. It's only after S2 he starts gathering up people to form the Syndicate, committing fully to his ideology. Before he was content to chill in the Arctic with Phil.
With this background I have three points of contention to make-
Firstly, something I've always found interesting about Techno's character is how his anarchy thing might clash with the people he cares about. More specifically, I always wondered "if Techno was forced to choose between upholding anarchy and Phil, who or what would he choose?" Post Season 2 Techno I'm unsure of, but given the limited amount of lore from Season 1 about Techno I'm going off of to build his character, I'm writing his character arc in this fic to be him coming to the realization that he cares more about his family's wellbeing more than he does anarchy or upholding his whole blood god thing. It's a realization that Techno would have needed to spend months with his family again, living with them, to make and have him commit to. Techno back in Nov 16 would have been unsure what he would have picked.
Secondly, we don't have confirmation about where Techno got his anarchist ideals from, which is important because motivation is important. We know at this point in canon he strongly believes in them for real, but we're not given backstory on why that it. There's hints and theories, some of which are far more plausible than others - I've chosen to set the root of his anarchy belief in what he says in this chapter - governments are the only ones strong enough to take him down as an organized group of power. Governments have tried to take him down and nearly succeeded - that's what the Butcher Army was. That event was what brought him out of retirement to turn L'Manberg into L'Hole. And Techno in canon is reinforced in the belief that anarchy's best for everyone because of what it did to Phil and Tommy. He sees how both of them were hurt by L'Manberg's system of power, something that once again Techno in this fic didn't experience. We don't know what's happened in his backstory to make him stand on his anarchy thing, but that also means we don't know how easily Pogtopia Techno would have been convinced to give up on it. He believes it, but why and how much? I've made my choice of interpretation in this fic precisely because we don't know, and his canon decision to go into retirement was what influenced my writing here. I genuinely believe if L'Manberg hadn't attacked in, but instead turned out to be a functioning government like they could have been, his anarchy spiel about bad government is for at least other people, if not himself, would have subsided. But that's not the sort of plot that runs a livestream, is it?
Thirdly - and this ties into point 2 - probably at some point in canon Techno's past government has wronged him and he's seen government repeatedly wrong other people, hence his beliefs that again, the Butcher Army and New L'Manberg under Tubbo only strengthened when it had the chance to subside them. You could even draw allusions back to his skyblock series and take the quote "If skyblock has told me anything, it is that if you have a problem, the answer is slavery" to mean that he's seen the governmentally structured system of skyblock drag its players into an endless, pointless competing grind whilst also committing mass slave-related atrocities, which would be one of the more plausible backstories for Techno and explain where his anarchy ideals might have developed. But we're still operating canon Techno under the rules of the Dream SMP, and the Dream SMP's world is very much not the world presented in Valley of Serenity.
See, my decision - very conscious, deliberate, developed decision - to worldbuild Valley of Serenity in a way that's more akin to a fantasy world in the midst of their equivalent of the Age of Exploration instead of modeling it off how the Dream SMP worlds has definitely also influenced the way I plan the character developments in this fic. Valley of Serenity's world has nations, economies, established ethnic groups and populations and cultures and systems and thousands of years worth of history. L'Manberg started out as a city-state with some surrounding farmland area that had its own history and a decently sized population before Wilbur got there. The Dream SMP canon, meanwhile, has none of that established. You could argue there were civilians on the sideline that just aren't named, or that the Twitch viewers are just civilian in this world because Wilbur did the whole election thing (something that becomes increasingly unlikely each time a new streamer canonizes their stream chat as something that is decidedly not a country's population), but there's no canonical establishment for any of that. I don't think there is any hidden population of nameless background people in the DSMP lore. The lore makes far more sense without it, even with all the "political" drama. It would explain how people keep forming and abandoning and destroying new countries every other week and just.. getting away with it, and how Dream is able to spend so much time obsessing over one child in exile if he really has a country he's supposed to be the shadowmaster of, and how the whole clusterfuck of the Quackity Karl Sapnap marriage is even possible.
In a world like that, it's plausible for Techno's anarchy to be defensible to him, and to the other members of the Syndicate. However, in Valley of Serenity's world, his anarchy view makes absolutely zero sense, given how government is basically a natural result of humans settlings down to farm in large groups together. Most of DSMP's people can decide to just quit and wander off to live alone for the rest of their lives, no problem, but in a world like VoS or the real world? They are very fucked and so stay in large groups, which then, as history shows, results in some authority being assigned to a group of people to administrate things once the group becomes large enough... and boom. Government, and the start of civilization.
The only way for Techno in Valley of Serenity's universe to plausibly believe in the government stuff, especially after all those talks he had with Wilbur about L'Manberg, would be for me to write him as a completely idiot who's utterly unaware of how governments actually work.
If there's one thing I hate it's writing Techno as an idiot. The same Techno who dominated MCM and Skyblock and prepared for weeks for battle against L'Manberg and managed to successfully build a hidden piston door concealing wither skulls and had the foresight to write a will with "instructions" for Phil because he knew the prison was likely a trap and who has enough battle strategy to defeat Dream and also know not to trust him and thought up contingency plans to escape the Butcher army with the totems and who regularly makes the most intelligent, witty, sarcastic and well-timed remarks with dialogue - Techno is not an idiot. He is far, far from it. In the DSMP universe his anarchy ideals would be defended. In VoS'? Absolutely not. And if Techno has any amount of sense at all in this universe, which he does, he knows it too. I made a choice when I wrote this fic's world the way I did, and I'm am committed to seeing the choice through. Part of the reason why I did it? It was because I wanted to explore the way events like L'Manberg and Pogtopia would have affected the characters in their beliefs and trauma in a realistic setting of war and rebellion and political battles, and DSMP's world was just not a good conduit for that. Places like Sanctuary and arcs like Tubbo's struggles back in L'Manberg wouldn't be able to exist if I didn't go down this route, note to mention how wrong it felt to me to write Wilbur's presidency heavily affecting him when the people he's presiding over is just his friends. Everything would have felt cheaper, faker, more simulated if it had been in a world with Minecraft and DSMP rules. I knew this would require some reinterpretation of certain characters' motivations, but it was worth it to me to give their recovery a sense of weight and realism I felt the DSMP world wouldn't have been able to deliver. (I'm not making any point on how realistic or "heavy" DSMP does its trauma - livestreaming is a vastly different medium than writing and some points here would need to be translated differently when applied to livestream, just as a good book doesn't always make a good movie).
Hence, combined with points 1 and 2, the differing characterization between canon Techno and here.
It's important to note that Techno, Phil, Tommy, and Wilbur are a family unit here in a way that's been completely disproven in canon. They have a backstory that ties them together. This has also definitely influenced Techno's priorities and nudged him towards the path of conscious realization about his anarchy thing here, though it's not a point because it doesn't factor too much into the relevant mentality of Techno's character in terms of how much he believes in the anarchy thing.
So yeah, I hope this clears up some stuff for you! Or that you understand at least why I made the decision with Techno's character.
there were definitely typos in this reply. no im not going back to reread and fix them.
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She-Ra Review (Better late than never)
Okay, I just watched the first episode of the original She-Ra and... PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF! I think we evolved quite from that. Even though Bow used to have more male empowerment by showing off even more skin, lol.
But here it is. Review of the new She-Ra:
So, for me the show overall used to be quite in need of getting used to. I guess because the stakes are rather low and I preferred more adult-orientated shows. Falling from a high point and not getting hurt or getting hit by a laserbeam and just stumbling backwards wasn't doing it for me.
But after giving AtLA a chance, I was able to go back to more child-like shows and to just roll with it. The plot never really interested me. We need to do this or that in order to accomplish this- fine by me. Just do what you do.
I never cared much about the kingdoms or the people living there. It was just decoration. Some interesting character designs in the background. No culture. When the evil-doers took the decoration away, I didn't care. I was missing some "war leaves scars, in people and the landscapes". Sometimes wounds can't be healed. Sometimes we can't return things the way they were. Make the loss of something count so you see its worth.
There was also never a moment where I wanted to know more about the lore or the past. How it all functions. What carried the series were the characters. But a lot of them are more like a walking gimmick and aside from that nothing.
I think Bow is one of the best characters. He has some nice, positive masculinity going, he is a mediator, he tries to find solutions and tries to keep the team together. When he later just snaps and says "I can't be the happy one all the time!", I felt that. He has a right to be mad at someone too (Glimmer) and he doesn't have to instantly forgive. Lol, I had people say you are immature if you don't forgive and stuff. And dozens of characters who constantly have to be the bigger person, no, more like they have to be Jesus in order to keep the rest happy and zero damage is shown. Their psyche doesn't matter.
So. Big <3 for Bow and his only weakness: A covered belly! x'D
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Scorpia is probably the heart and soul of the series. And after seeing how her original was... that's fucking evolution times ten! xD She is just so genuinely likable and clueless while also being insecure. When she wears the princess-prom dress for the first time and blushes... what a cutie! I was going AWWW! And when she finally realizes that Catra is no friend material and Catra realizes who she chased away with her behavior: That was true loss! I felt that. I didn't do wrong to Scorpia, but I felt the pain anyway. So, like Bow, Scorpia didn't stay the punching bag forever and reacted. I like that!
10 out of 10 scorpions for Scorpia!!
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Entrapta has a really cool design, especially with her moving hair. All the budget to the hair! For some reason I also like her name a lot! It's rather extraordinary, heh! Unlike "Glimmer" or "Bow" which are rather on the nose. Normally I dislike the "limitless young genius" trope, but Entrapta at least had some limitations (mostly when they were plot-relevant, though) and she is a princess after all, so a special affinity to something (and if it is machines) beyond a normal person's grasp is believable. Unlike others... (Raph from TFP. "Hacking into the FBI? No problem!" H-How?!) And while she is in regards to anything else rather airheaded (uhm, robots kill people. Well, not on screen, but... I'm sure they killed someone), she at least realizes that later and it got her a connection to Hordak which no usual good guy could have done.
An army of robots for Entrapta!
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Hordak the missed opportunity. Not enough screentime at all. They gave this cliché evil guy a soul and they did next to nothing with it. All his good scenes are with Entrapta and there are only a few. Later he sheds TEARS when he realizes she never betrayed him! Why can't we get more scenes like that? Him being a failed clone is a good backstory and a scene with the creation of Imp would have complimented that a lot. Imagine the half-dead baby lying there and it's about to be flushed away, but Hordak hesitates. He picks Imp up, looking at him. Discarding him because he is not perfect? Because he will never be what he was supposed to? But who says that he can't accomplish something? Hordak sees himself in the baby and shows fate the metaphorical middle finger. He presses the baby tightly against his chest and murmurs: "We will show them...", accepting the baby and ultimately himself...
In the last season we get Wrong Hordak and while having someone around who is completely pure and naive to a world beyond the hivemind (just like a person escaping a cult) is important to show so we get the clones's perspective, we kinda lose on the real Hordak there. All he does is stare at that one crystal sometimes... until the end when he does the "throw the emperor in the pit Darth Vader style!" thing. Lame. He should have been with the good guys sooner and shown some recovery there.
A baby bottle for Hordak so he can feed his future robot children with Entrapta.
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Glimmer. For some reason I always saw her as a side character who somehow got cast as a main character. She just constantly slipped out of my mind. Oh yeah, she has mother issues and a whole family and kingdom, but... she just seems so flat! You could put Adora in her position and nothing of value would have been lost. Still the main hero who fights evil. Maybe without fancy glitter magic. When she becomes queen and later almost a tyrant, that's when she gets more interesting, but still... I was just "where is Adora?" whenever she hogged the screentime. Not interested in this character in the slightest. No glitter for Glimmer.
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Adora. Does the main character things. Even doesn’t hesitate sacrificing herself for the greater good. Is the typical main character. Doesn’t think things through, runs towards the enemy, is immature, gobbles down food. Main character. I don’t like this kind of main character, but I don’t hate her either. Neutrality for Adora.
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Catra got too much screentime. Yeah. We get it. She has issues. She makes bad decisions. Very bad. She regrets it. Is hurt. But can't be the bigger cat. When she later visits Glimmer constantly in her prison, I was just groaning. Give someone else the screentime! We get it! We get Catra's problems! Sometimes less is more!
I don't know how people viewed her coming together with Adora in the end, but I was glad they were allowed to kiss and say I love you and so on. Not that I shipped it, but hey, be happy. They were all over each other throughout the series. Just let them be happy. Yeah, Catra did horrible things (but what I said about lasting damage in this series. It ain't there.), but if Catra was Starscream, I wouldn't object either and I have to stay fair here. If Starscream is a war criminal and I still simp for him, then I have to give other villains the same treatment without finger pointing and screaming "Abusive! Toxic!". Except I want it to be, but that is another story to tell...
Aside from that, Catra showed regrets and emotional pain. Starscream is entirely different there. I love him the way he is, but... sometimes it's hard to stay on his side. But that's the writers's fault. I also like about Catra that she just laughs into villains's faces. I didn't expect that character to be able to carry a whole army on her shoulders and lead them. With nothing but cat powers, lol. That thing with electrocuting Entrapta and pushing the "planet gets blown apart" button... juuuuust stop. It ain't worth it. That's some serious own grave digging there.
A cat for Catra.
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The lesser princesses. Why are the elements so weirdly spread? We got magic, plants, water, ice, lightning bolts. And some others who don't have crystals. But the main elements are really weird decisions. From the traditional elements we got only water and it hogs two crystals! Then we got the element of magic which is okay in the context of this world. Then plants and red electricity which is also okay on a greater Pokémon-esque scale. It feels like something is missing there. Especially when they talk about their weaknesses "Fire, fire, fire..." Where is the fire princess? The earth princess? These are two main elements and if you don't want to go the traditional route then make all elements something out of the ordinary. Not water AND ice if you only have five crystals around.
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Frosta could have been entirely cut. She says nothing of worth and adds nothing of worth. Her gimmick is "Toph" but with heart and soul cut out. When she was introduced I expected her to be the most mature, raised from a young age to act more adult than she actually is, because she needed to grow up fast in these times. Her country is the largest and with great power comes great responsibility. We could have gotten quite political here, how complicated it can be. The hard decisions you have to make and the compromises you have to take. All for the sake of keeping your people safe. Her character arc could have been about that and about finding her childish side again which was denied from her. There. Also her big country is meaningless aside from her introduction episode. Since she always fights with the princesses alone with ZERO bodyguards and all... Where is the power of that country??
A snow-less winter for Frosta.
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Mermista's gimmick is "snarky". When she shows new parts of her personality like reading novels, it's a one-episode thing. It takes quite a while for her to get actually likable. Not that I disliked her, she just had no presence. When she later leads a mission we get to see more of her, but those are the moments where I feel like we are missing a couple of episodes that should be dedicated to the other princesses alone or with them as the focus. They are just shoved into the background so much by Adora, Bow and Glimmer, that shouldn't be. They are in the opening after all as if they are part of a group that is always together.
Sea Hawk is constantly dancing on the thin line between okay and annoying. Though I like that it is a fabulous guy having a relationship with a girl and not the "boring guy". But the men of She-Ra are mostly beyond the usual men tropes of angry, stoic, boring, stupid dude. So it doesn't even stand out as much as it should, lol. Like I hate this trope that the most beautiful girl/sexy woman of a show comes together with "the average Joe" or "comedic relief who is also often times small in stature". I guess... I know why that is...  Anyway, the main girl/more chaste woman gets together with the main hero. Mr McBoredom but strong! While the fabulous guy... is either evil, has a bad character, is not traditionally manly, is just shallow. No pretty men for the girls. Well. Not anymore!
A dolphin for Sea-Ra and what she could have been if she had more screentime.
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Perfuma is the hippie princess and I guess my favorite from the lesser princesses (though, there is no real competition.). The way she handles things are in line with her beliefs and sometimes she says some actual intelligent remarks, but isn't listened to because she isn't the brash one, but the harmonious one. Which is sad. Everybody rather calm down and meditate instead of getting in each other's faces. That could work wonders sometimes. So, she actually is the first to see that Scorpia doesn't want to attack them when she left Catra while the others just keep attacking. Her shtick really is taking into consideration when she is written in a situation. However, sometimes it is a bit too much. Power of friendship isn't going to break the mind-control chip and they all saw time and time again that IF the controlled person can get a grasp on themselves again, it's only for mere seconds. So cut the crap, it's not against your beliefs when you stop thoughts-and-prayers-ing for something that won't change without actually doing something against it.  Fun fact: Because she was so insisting of poweroffriendshipping Scorpia out of control, I was almost expecting a digivolut- uhm, a transformation there, lol! Especially because they mentioned before, she could be one of the strongest princesses. Well, of course she wouldn't become more forceful. Except she might get the power to swipe negative thoughts away and disperse fighting will. Now... that didn't happen, but still... (Also a nice episode with her having to admit she doesn’t get cacti. There is actually some character development here!)
A beautiful flower for Perfuma!
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Spinnerella and Netossa. “The biracial gay couple” hanging around in the background until they became characters in the later seasons. Finally! I found the “biracial gay couple” trope so often in shows, it’s like they want to stuff as much diversity as they can into two characters and then keep everything else conservative. Thankfully She-Ra shows a lot of diversity everywhere.
A net carried by wind for Spinnerella and Netossa.
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Swift Wind. Back to the sketch block. Nothing of worth was done or said. He is supposed to have this super important magical connection to She-Ra, but she hardly uses him. He is just another fighter... somewhere else. If he is there. And he stands out like a sore thumb as the only talking animal. Maybe you could make it a gimmick for a toyline that every princess can summon a pet to ride. That would have been cool. Or if he stayed mute and acted just like a horse. Then you could have had the cuteness factor. And the animal behavior factor which is also cute... and funny. Think of Pegasus from Disney's Hercules. That's a good horse companion! But Swift Wind? Annoying. Unimportant. Waste of time.
No unicorn for Swift Wind.
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Shadow Weaver. Didn't like her. Wanted power, got what she wanted, but too much. Ugly now. Her powers are rather weak. I didn't even pay attention to the episode where she haunts Adora. As if that's gonna do something in the long run. Then Catra stole her job. Rightfully so. She got imprisoned, then fled, then became an ally. When she later sacrificed herself and said to Catra that she is proud of her, well, did she say it so Catra would do what she wanted or did taking off the mask symbolize that she finally said the truth? We might never know and we might never care.
No dark magic for Shadow Weaver.
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Emperor I have two many eyes. (Badumm-Tss!) "I want to destroy the universe!" What a lame motivation. What can I even say to that? Of course only mind-controlled people would follow this goal and I remember a series where someone carried their own clone and said "It's sad when oneself is the only one you can rely on/trust". Yeah.
Why did Hordak even build an empire when everything was supposed to be destroyed? Why open a portal to the asshole who didn't want you in the first place? So many toxic parental figures in this series. And the children won't stop wanting their approval. When Prime shows Glimmer the last pieces of destroyed worlds or gives her food that is made of things that could only be found in these worlds, one gets a glimpse of the horror he represents. He could be the most horrible gourmet of all time "I only eat things made out of extinct lifeforms". Petty. But oh so scary. When you are so powerful that you can destroy worlds, what do you care about the ants living on them? But nah, he has some pseudo-religious thing going, assimilating people into his hivemind like the borg in Star Trek do. Actually, just assimilating people and growing his army and enriching the collected wisdom of galaxies could be a motivation, too. Then the good guys could make a stand for individualism. But eh, too complicated.
No green juice for Horde Prime.
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Prepare for Trouble and make it Double. Double Trouble. I learned something about the incompatibility of neutral pronouns and my native language. Their gimmick is "actor" and it's pretty over the top, it gets annoying fast. Not even the gayest nurse I'm working with talks like that and they would make any gaydar explode in a second. Maybe they could have gone a little deeper with that and give them some meta jokes about how scenes are gonna unfold and give us some surprises there. I don't like the opportunist crap they pull off, why even bother working together with Catra in the first place? Always join the winning team? What a Knock Out. Get out of here, before I make you swallow your own tail! Yes, I’m still salty about that. Fuck you, Predacons Rising! Fuck you!
A mirror for DT because after all they still have a sexy body.
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warrioreowynofrohan · 4 years
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Rhythm of War Review
PART 1
It feels a little separate from the rest of the book to me at the moment because I read it pre-release, but I think it did a good job setting up the rest of the plot. I greatly enjoyed Navani’s perspective and ideas throughout the book, and the first section established her much more firmly as a character than any of the previous books; her couple of chapters in Oathbringer were more focused on politics and her relationship with Dalinar, so it was great yo see much more of her scientific side.
When I first read Part 1 it felt very Kaladin-heavy, but after completing the book I see how it was necessary to establish his burnout in order to set up the rest of the plot. And Chapter 12 (A Way to Help), in addition to being our only chance in the book to see our trio together, did a great job setting up Kaladin’s later work with mentally ill people, both by establishing the need and showing what kind of help was needed. I was nonetheless quite frustrated by Kaladin reacting to Shallan’s DID with “that would be nice...”. She’s having serious problems, Kal! She’s your friend and could use support, not you regarding her issues as a neat way to take a holiday from one’s own brain! Kaladin’s very kind and caring with those he chooses to protect, as we see with Bridge 4 in TWOK and the mentally ill people in Chapter 25, but sometimes I think he’s not a very good friend. I know he was not in a good place, but in Oathbringer when they were in Shadesmar Shallan had just had a complete breakdown and she still went out of her way to emotionally support Kal, so it would be nice to see his friendships become a bit more two-way. (For similar reasons, I liked seeing the moments of Shallan-to-Adolin emotional support in Shadesmar in ROW, because a lot of their relationship in OB was her relying on him; it felt balanced in ROW as both supported each other.)
PART 2
I loved the Shadesmar arc! The emotional arcs for both main characters were very strong - I had been looking forward to seeing Adolin’s reaction to (in-universe) Oathbringer, and it did not disappoint; the conflict between genuinely loving Dalinar and being unable to forgive what he’d done was well-drawn. I was so pissed off at Dalinar in that last conversation! You burned his mom to death, you do not get to take the moral high ground and lecture him. And I do see a difference between killing innocents, as Taravangian does, and killing someone who’s effectively declared war on you and has a history of treason.
I also liked Adolin’s sense of being generally at sea with his purpose in the world. He’s been trained primarily as a warrior and general, and his combat skills have been made virtually obsolete by the Radiants. And at the same time, the reader can see what makes Adolin special, and it’s not combat skills - though those do give him a big heroic moment in a pinch - it’s his care and compassion for others. The way he interacts with Maya and slowly brings her life is absolutely beautiful. Chapter 35 was such a wonderful Shadolin moment (and starspren are amazing!); he really gets her and understands what she needs. Chapter 24 was sweet too, though super cheesy.
I spent the entire Shadesmar arc side-eying Veil and Radiant, especially with Veil’s takeover stunt at the start, but in the end they genuinely were supporting and helping Shallan. So in retrospect I do like scenes like the one with Veil trying to draw Shallan out by drawing Adolin badly.
Spoeking of drawing, I love the spren art, it’s some of the best art so far, and fascianting to see how they all look!
Kaladin finding non-violent ways to protect, culminating in pioneering Rosharan therapy - and Teft insisting on staying to support him - was everything I wanted for him. His arc could have just been that, and I’d have been perfectly happy. Chapter 25 (Devotary of Mercy) is still my favourite in the entire book.
Unfortunately, then Odium’s forces had to show up and SPOIL EVERYTHING. I’m rather appalled by how quickly Urithiru fell - the enemy forces were literally in the pillar room by the time anyone noticed them.
PART 3
Part 3 was a real slog for me, partly because it is a slog and partly because I hit it at the height of my sleep deptivation. (It’s really...not a good thing to be reading on zero sleep at the literal darkest-hour-before-dawn.) Kaladin’s arc in Urithiru is just so exhausting; he’s so clearly worn to the boneand everything feels so hopeless. Kaladin’s had bad times before - Bridge 4 in TWOK, for example - but then the reader could see progress even if Kaladin couldn’t. (Kaladin: I’m getting nowhere and failing at everything! Everyone else: Kaladin, you were literally just miraculously resurrected.) Here, though - well, I genuinely spent the whole book from Part 3 through to the climax thinking that they would lose Urithiru.
Navani’s arc, and Venli’s, I did enjoy.
The other section of Part 3, in Emul, just felt rather disjointed. It had some interesting moments, but it didn’t have a sense of cohesion or of where it was going. I was entertained by Dalinar’s musings on the merits of despositism and the need to free Queen Fen from having - horrors! - a parliament. (I wonder if the Fourth Ideal will be something like “I will recognize that it can sometimes be beneficial to have people oppose my decisions.”)
PART 4
Again, adored the Shadesmar arc. Really strong character arcs for both Adolin and Shallan, combined with excellent plots and a strong sense of momentum. I was pretty sure Maya would be crucial in the trial, but that didn’t make the moment any less powerful (though Sanders probably shouldn’t have tried quite as hard to replicate his “You. Cannot. Have. My. Pain.” moment from Oathbringer). I need to put together a proper post on the theme of choice in Oathbringer, because that moment - combined with Kaladin’s fourth ideal and the conflict with Lirin over the way he’s inspiring the resistance - really crystallized it for me. To treat a person’s choice and sacrifices as something done to them is to devalue their volition, their agency. Maya is put in the horrifying situation of being used as a prop and treated as evidence of a point that she is diametrically opposed to and turned into a weapon against someone she loves, and it’s enough to drive her to regain her voice and speak for herself. I am very curious to know what specifically led the spren to agree to the Recreance!
I did not remotely guess what Shallan’s secret was, even though in retrospect the Cryptic deadeye should have made it incredibly obvious. I think her fear that she’d lose Adolin if it came out was overblown - he already knows she killed both her parents, he’s not going to be fazed by “I was so distraught over having to kill my own mother in self-defence at age ten that I broke my Radiant oaths”. But obviously it’s not something Shalkan would be able to consider duspassionately. Her arc was rather terrifying once I realized that Formless was, well, basically her, but more specifically, Shallan’s idea of the monster that she was, and her breakdown was driving her to “accept who she was” as being that monster. I like Shallan and was never that into Veil - though she was fairly good in this book and went out well - so I’m not sad to see the back of her.
I haven’t managed to work through all the espionage/mole elements. Yes, Pattern used the box to talk to Wit, and Radiant killed Ialai so Shallan wouldn’t, but who’s Mraize’s spy close to Dalinar?
This arc ended too abruptly. I think Sanderson could easily have traded a Kaladin chapter in Part 3 for an extra chapter wrapping up events in Shadesmar; maybe one where Shallan first goes to see Testament.
I enjoyed the Urithiru arc in Part 4 as well. Switching to Bridge 4 points of view other than Kaladin was a good move - we already know he’s worn to ribbons, so we don’t need to be inside his head to see it. “The Dog and the Dragon” was amazing, and the most appropriate story ever for Kaladin. (I get how Wit’s schtick of telling incredibly topical stories and then saying “no, I don’t have a point, what point?” would be really aggravating in person.) It was nice to see him be gentle with Kaladin for a change, the way he is with Shallan - his two previous encounters with Kaladin read as rather baiting, which annoyed me.
Dabbid was - I don’t know quite how to say this, but his inclusion struck an amazing balance in this book. Navani’s arc is all about two amazingly smart people doing science and making incredible breakthroughs, and that is sincerely valued and given importance by the narrative, and then you get chapters like Dabbid’s and one of Taravangian’s emphasizing that a person’s value and ability to contribute is not determined by their intelligence.
Navani’s arc continued to be excellent. All of her research, and the way the story took you through the process, and her complex relationship with Raboniel, was great.
I loved Venli’s character development, and growing willingness to take risks for the sake of others. To me, her arc parallels Dalinar’s in the last book in some ways. If we can love the story of a bloodthirsty conqueror growing to become a good person, why can’t we equally love the story of a coward coming to become a good person? There seems to be a tendency to be more drawn to strength, even in its most terrible forms, than to weakness. To me, Venli’s confession to Rlain and acceptance of his disgust at her was one of the book’s great moments. (And I can’t understand people saying her arc took up two much space. She had 5 chapters in Part 3, and 4 in Part 4. That’s not very many! I’ll grant that the flasbacks packed less punch than some earlier flashback sequences because we already knew the main events - Brandon acknowledged that even before the book came out - but I still liked them well enough, and Venli’s present-day arc was excellent.)
Anyway, the amount of space I’ve spent on this section relative to Part 3 is another strong inducation of the differences in how I feel about them!
PART 5
I should probably start this section with a discussion of Moash. I’ll try to keep it summarized. here - I could, and may, write a short essay on his development through The Stormlight Archive. The first thing that jumps out about Moash’s arc in this book is his reaction to Renarin’s vision in Part 1. I think that vision is showing Moash who he could still be, in a similar way to Shallan’s inspirational drawings of people - both use the Surge of Illumination. So it’s not that Moash is irredeemable; Renarin is specifucally holding out to him the possibility of redemption.
And Moash’s reaction is to run away in terror. Because he desperately wants his decision to be irrevocable. He desperately wants there to only be one possible path forward for him. Because if there are alternative paths, it means he can choose them, and that would mean facing guilt, facing the fact that his past choices were wrong, and his current choices are wrong. And that is exactly what Moash sought to avoid by giving up his pain and sense of guilt to Odium.
Moash is, nonetheless, very much Moash and not Vyre, as evidenced by his continuing obsession with Kaladin. As with his above need to not be wrong, here he needs to feel that he’s right, and the only way he can feel that he’s right is if Kaladin - whom he still deeply admires - makes the same decision as him, and if Moash can convince himself that he’s doing Kaladin a favour in driving him to that point. It’s ironic that he’s given up almost all feeling abd become almost enturely detached, but his worst actions are driven by his attitude towards the one person in the world who he still does have very strong feelings about. By the end of the book, he’s comprehensively broken, to the point that even when his ability to feel is restored he’s unable to even feel genuine remose over the cold-blooded murder of a friend. I don’t know where he’ll go from here - it would be ironic if he was only ever really appealing to Rayse-Odium, and Taravangian-Odium found Moash too much of a flat villain for his purposes and cast him off.
As the plot climaxes go, I thought the ones for Navani and Venli were excellent and very satisfying. I enjoyed Kaladin’s as well and found it cathartic, but it a was moment we all knew had to come, so it didn’t have quite the kick of some of Kaladin’s other big moments. I did love his reconciliation with Lirin. One of the themes of the book was finding common ground despite deeply felt disagreements - with Navani and Raboniel, with Navani and the Sibling, and with humans and singers/Fused more generally - and Kaladin and Lirin’s reconciliation fit well with that. I am far more favourable to Lirin than most people - if you’ve lived as a pacifist in storming Alethkar, which values the lives of its people slightly more than it does crem, you’re going to have been right a solid 95% of the time, where everyone else was wrong. I can make allowances for the other five percent, especially when Lirin’s life lesson from the last five or so years has been “resisting oppression and standing up for what you believe in will destroy everyone you love”.
And on the topic of finding common ground, Leshwi’s reaction to the revelation that Venli was a Radiant was one of the single most beautiful moments of the book, and one of my absolute favourites. It’s gorgeous and moving, and at the same time rather tragic, because - what might have bern different if Venli had revealed herself to Leshwi at the start of the book? How much of the conflict could have been avoided. Singers don’t appear to attract spren as strongly as humans do, which makes Leshwi drawing joyspren particularly powerful. And then the bittersweet note from “My soul is too long owned by someone else”. (Come to think of it, this is another inverted paralell to Moash. This is someone realizing “I was wrong about everything and I’m so glad about that because it means I have a chance to be someone better than I was.”) Oh my goodness, I would love a Leshwi chapter in a later book, just to check in on her and see how she’s doing in her new life with the Singers.
I also loved the climax of Navani’s arc, and was so relieved, because up until that very moment I wasn’t sure if the Sibling would survuve uncorrupted. I know that some people weren’t pleased because the Sibling didn’t even like her, but to me that became a core part of the story, like I said above - people who deeply disagree finding common ground and common cause. That is a key element of being a Bondsmith - the process of bringing people together in spite of their differences - and something that fits Navani so well given the rapport she found with Raboniel. (Though I was conflicted about the latter. On the one hand, she made amazing discoveries that enabled her to save Urithiru. One the other hand, she...kind of collaborated with the enemy and gave them terrible weapons out of intellectual curiosity and a desire to prove herself?) I will grant that it makes the series, and the characters with the most crucial importance to Roshar, rather Kholin-heavy.
For Taravodium, all I can say is - YIPES. I have no idea how to process the implications of that, but I feel like it will be bad. Really really bad. (Taravangian is probably my least favourite character in the entire Stormlight Archive. The attitude of “I am so brave and selfless for doing evil things and look at how wonderful I am for sacrificing my own morality for the benefit of all, you petty selfish people wanting to be good could never make such a grand sacrifice” drives me absolutely nuts. It’s a complete inversion and twisting of morality, and intensely arrogant.)
Dalinar’s encounter with Ishar was fascinating, and I’m very curious to see where this goes. The spren experiments were deeply creepy! And the way Radiant Oaths can temporarily restore a Herald’s sanity was fascinating - I’m very eager to see where this goes in the next book. I suspect that Dalinar may have made a very serious mistake with regards to this trial my combat, and I have no idea how/if they’re going to fit Szeth’s whole arc into the ten days before the duel. I’ve been eagerly anticipating Szeth’s arc ever since The Way of Kings!
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sarenhale · 3 years
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Could you maybe tell us a little bit more the Silver Snakes personalities?
I’d love to!!  I tried to some up their personalities here a bit:
Nicolai: Nicolai has been living with apathy since he was a kid, and has always struggled to relate and emphatize with his peers. Due to his lonely upbringing, he’s also used to being alone and that may be also what caused his disinterest in people. He’s generally quiet and disinterested in almost everything that is not spilling blood on the battlefield. He’s always bored but hates boredom. 
He’s talented enough in most Academic subjects, but he doesn’t have any interest in excelling in any of them. He enjoys the company of Leon and Esther, and doesn’t understand the ostentation of some nobles.
Cassandra: Cassandra is used to have people around, and carry herself with the pride and powerful image of someone of her position, but a more glance in her behavior and personality tells otherwise. She’s a good leader and has a way with people, but this ability seems to be born out of necessity, rather than a natural talent. Despite her obligations, she remains a free spirit inside and has always wished for a different life. She finds it easy to emphatize with people, but her softness has often been pointed out as her main weakness, along with her idealistic (but unrealistic) views on politics. 
She always enjoys being around people, and taking care of everyone, making sure they’re settling alright. She’s more close to Sayid and Esther, that she has known for years.
Mithra: Mithra doesn’t talk much, and prefers actions to words. She’s used to the world of discipline of the military, and carries her duties as a student with equal zeal. She prefers the company of a few selected friends than to being in large groups, and she can always be seen doing something - training, taking care of the greenhouse, cleaning... She’s very reliable and easy to work with- zero chit chat, more straight to the action. She bonded more with Leon and Olympia, but she is also often sparring partner with Nicolai.
Sayid: Sayid is a bit of the opposite of Cassandra, the other side of the coin. He was raised to be a leader, but to also dabble in political intrigues, strategy, and the idea that, to get to the top, you have to be willing to do everything: even dirty your hands when it’s necessary. He lacks the softness that Cassandra has, and has a more practical and cold approach to everything: problems, politics, people. While very efficient, he can be seen as ruthless. He values his position greatly, but is mostly proud of what him and his family have achieved on their own through war and blood, regardless of their title.
He’s spoiled and finds commoners fascinating. 
Leon: Leon has a kind and calm personality., kind of the peace keeper in the group of so many clashing personalities. He has always cared for his little brother and sister growing up, so he’s using to look after people and be the responsible one of the group. It’s very difficult to make him angry.
For him, fighting derived from survival, and the need to protect himself and his brothers through his journeys, resulting in an efficient but rough way of fighting. He’s very studious and willing to learn.
Esther: Esther is a lively, spontaneous character that doesn’t have any problems saying what she thinks, even if her words can hit where it hurts sometimes. She’s used on relying on herself, and so she’s very stubborn and determined, even when times are tough. She values her indipendence more than anything else.
She likes to tell jokes, and her sarcasm is often a way to express her affection towards her friends. She has a hard time trusting nobles and little patience for their existence.
Kristjan: Kristjan is always awfully quiet, and trying to become one with the wall. He hates being at the center of attention, and generally tries to keep to himself and make sure he’s as quiet and invisible as possible. He finds it hard to engage in conversations or spend time with his classmates, but they are trying to make him feel more at ease and come out of his shell a bit. He especially seems to strongly dislike physical contact of any sort, and flinches when people come too close.
He can be often found in the library, or embroidering on his own, the time when he seems to relax a little.
Olympia: Olympia is very outgoing, likes to spend time with people and get to know everyone. She may be a little eccentric sometimes, but she’s the type that always tries to envolve the shyest ones in the group, acting a bit like a ‘big sister’. She’s a romantic at heart and she’s hoping to find someone equally honorable and strong to be able to face her in a duel, and win. Her love for fashion is matched for her passion for fighting, and she considers highly anyone that knows their way on the battlefield.
Some characters do change post timeskip, especially Sayid, Kristjan and Cassandra, but this is a general overwiev of the ‘core’ of their personalities
Thank you for asking about them!! <3
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randomfandomimagine · 3 years
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Games With Trish: The Last of Us Part II
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Granted, I didn’t actually play this myself but watched my brother play it instead. Still, I’m kind of glad he had the controller because the game looks so difficult and scary. Overall, I absolutely adored the game and it has so many good things. For that reason, I’ll say the bad things first since there are very few.
I know this game was very controversial, but this is my personal opinion and thoughts, not facts. Let me know your opinion if you want (as long as you’re kind and polite, please!). 
Long rant and spoilers under the cut!
Bad things
I have two main things to complain about in the game: the violence and its heavy emotional charge. Now, I don’t necessarily hate them because not only does it make sense that it’s a violent game taking place in a post-apocalyptic world where it’s kill or be killed, but it also goes along with the message of hate and revenge the game wants to tell. 
Still, the game gave me a lot of anxiety and I didn’t enjoy it as much as I could have for this reason. I averted my gaze a few times (when they break Yara’s arm being one of them) because it’s so brutal. I’m also a very sensitive person, so each time we played it was so tense and sad that I ended up exhausted. Every time a character died it was so harrowing... Abby’s Day 3 was so intense that I was a little overwhelmed, and Yara’s death was like the final straw and we had to take a break from the game. Characters also die so quickly, which is realistic, but it didn’t give you enough time to react before you were thrown into another scene or shootout. Between how frantic some scenes are and how brutal or tragic, I had to ask my brother to pause it a few times. The game really doesn’t give you a moment to breathe. That’s it, that’s my only complaint about the game. Now on to the good things.
Characters
First of all, and always my favorite thing about any story: the characters. Ellie is my all time favorite character, and even if I don’t agree with her choices and actions in this game, I can still empathize with her and love how complex and deep she is. She’s just human, and she is traumatized, so she does some questionable things.
Obviously, Troy Baker’s and Ashley Johnson’s performances are flawless, but Druckmann’s dialogues and writing is so... human. The characters interact like real people, they are spontaneous and natural, they have intimate moments of love, anger and a wide range of emotions. These characters fidget, frown, smile and have a myriad of human gestures (also improved with the amazing, mindblowing Naughty Dog graphics) that make them feel real. You can feel the emotion pour out of every gesture, every look, every expression.
I know Abby is also a controversial character but... I adore her. Of course we are meant to hate her at first, but the more time we spend with her, the more I grew fond of her even if I missed playing with Ellie. I couldn’t help but to admire Abby’s brute strength and bravery, even when she faces her fear of heights. When she tells her story, you understand her motivations as much as her actions hurt. Joel (like every character in this game and every person in that world) was not a good person, no matter how much we love him. Besides, at the end of the game it’s hard not to feel for Abby. She loses everyone as a direct result of her own revenge that she very much ends up regretting. When Ellie finds her at the end, it was hard to even tell that was Abby, I literally didn’t recognize her. So it was nice knowing that she found redemption and got her happy ending with Lev, her new family.
The side characters are all amazing. I was especially fond of Lev and Yara (Lev is an adorable little boy that must be protected, I just wanted to hug him) from Abby’s part and Dina and Jesse from Ellie’s part. I also loved Owen, Nora, Manny, Alice... everyone. Even Mel, who seems a bit more bland in comparison, has a defined personality. 
The plot
It is so well written, it makes so much sense, coherently and thematically, that I don’t understand some complaints. It’s also so compelling! People complain that Joel’s death made no sense and was just for shock value? It was a direct consequence of his actions at the end of the first game when he killed lots of people and literally doomed humanity out of selfishness. I still love Joel and I’m glad he saved Ellie, but this can’t be denied. Besides, the game deals a lot with the consequences of the characters’s actions, so it makes perfect sense to me.
Everything that happens in the plot and the story has a point. You kill lots of people as Ellie to avenge Joel, but then you get Abby’s point of view and grief the loss of those same characters. The game tries to make you feel for every person, which is why they all have names and their friends call out to them when they are shot. The main goal of the game was to get you to feel empathy for the ‘bad guys’. The point was that there are no good or bad guys in this story, only people with personal perspectives. Ellie and Abby are just two women who felt they were in the right. And in a way, they both were.
I just think the plot was coherent, with lots of interesting things, twists and surprises. Overall, it was realistic. There were no deus ex machinas, no crazy expectation subversions (because the twists were well established) and to me it felt like everything that happened had a meaning, as heart-crushing as it could be.
The themes
Now, this is one of my favorite things about the game. I read that Druckmann said that Ellie and Abby would have been friends in another life, and I agree. They are two sides of the same coin, or two different moments in the process of recovery from trauma and grief. 
Abby got her revenge and is dealing with the consequences of it, with the guilt and the rejection of those that don’t approve of her hate and resentment. When she got her revenge, she didn’t feel better (in fact she felt worse) so she does something good to change that. She literally returns to Yara and Lev to make amends for killing Joel, and in it she finds a new family. In the end, Abby actively choses not to do bad things anymore (even to the point of refusing to fight Ellie) and let go of that hatred.
Ellie is in the first stages of grief, needing to look for Abby until she kills her for what she did to Joel. There are some hardcore visceral moments that show the dark side of revenge, like when she finds Nora or attacks Mel and Owen. Even when Abby lets her go she still can’t forget about Joel’s death. It was a nice respite in the farm with Dina and JJ, but her guilt and PTSD don’t leave her and she has to go again. She is literally going through what Abby already lived, hence why she tells Ellie ‘I’m not doing this’ when they meet at the end of the game.
Ellie and Abby were on the same path even if they started on different places. Abby had done terrible things for Isaac as a Wolf but finds redemption when protecting Lev. Ellie mostly wanted to live a happy life until her father figure was taken from her. They meet common ground at some point and then go on their own paths again, which is why the game didn’t end on the theatre.
The first Last of Us was about love, but Part II is about hate. It speaks about how hatred and revenge never end, an eye for an eye and everyone will end up blind. The characters have to make conscious choices to avoid it ruining their lives even further and that’s why the ending is so good. More on that later.
Little things
The setting is incredible, it feels lived in and sometimes it’s absolutely gorgeous. Every place has a history and some of them are just so cool. The musem with the flashback of Joel and Ellie was one of my favorite places, as well as the aquarium. Also, the part of the game where you go to Ground Zero? Terrifying! I was freaking out only watching my brother play, and I’m impressed that they managed to make it feel so dark and ominous. It’s brilliant that they thought of putting something like that in the game, as scary as it was.
The game has so much attention to detail, from how you always find alcohol and scissors in places like kitchens or bathrooms to how accurate the animations are. I was blown away when I saw the trailer with how you crawl under cars and cock the guns and everything, and the game has so many details like those.
Even the AI was insane, NPCs have dialogues if you let them speak and they are so smart. They turn around in the middle of their walking, like real people would, and make it extra challenging. I was so impressed with the AI.
The music was phenomenal as usual. The score just pulls the correct emotions out of you, whether it is making you feel the adrenaline with the drums or feel nostalgic or just make you sad with the guitar.
The ending
Finally, the ending. I think many people didn’t like it, but to me it was perfect. I was so convinced that either Ellie or Abby were going to die, or both! I was relieved that they both lived, and in a way that made so much sense. To me it was a satisfying end to everything that had been set up, a coherent end to all the themes and the message that the game sent. Revenge is bad, let go of that hatred or it will consume you.
Ellie can’t kill Abby. She spent so long thinking about Joel in his last moments, about how she was helpless and couldn’t save him, and that fueled her anger and hatred. Her survivor’s guilt from the first game only got worst when it meant seeing her father figure die. Still, when she is about to kill Abby she thinks about him in a different way. She sees him fondly, with his jacket and coffee and playing guitar. She doesn’t see him bloody and dying as he was that dreadful day. That’s why she doesn’t kill Abby. 
Abby and Lev find Santa Catalina after everything they went through. IT’s Abby’s ‘reward’ for not going after Ellie again after what happened with Owen, Mel and everyone. They get their happy ending together as a family: Lev can be himself and feel safe even with everything that he loss, Abby can start forgiving herself for her guilt and honor both her father and Owen by returning to the Fireflies. She was lost in the darkness but found the light. It’s also symbolic that she isn’t as buff or has her long hair because she’s letting go of the reason why she had them.
Ellie lost everything. She couldn’t let go of her hatred and in doing so she was left completely alone, which was her worst fear. She risked everything and the only thing she had left, which was Dina (the representation of a happy life) is gone. It was also heartbreaking that she couldn’t even play guitar (as a guitar player myself and music lover, that hurt me profoundly) because she lost her fingers as a consequence of her attempt at revenge. 
I saw theories that Dina was actually waiting for her somewhere else because Ellie was wearing her bracelet, and I hope so too. It seems strange that Dina would abandon her dream of living in a farm if she was staying with Ellie, but I still want to hold on to that hope. I shipped those two so hard, and I really want Ellie to have a somewhat happy ending.
The last few minutes were beautifully tragic. Bittersweet. Ellie is alive, but leaves everything behind, all of her belongings (including Joel’s guitar) in order to move on. It was the only way she had to let go of her grief from Joel’s death and start a new life instead of repeating the vicious cycle of revenge. Just... powerful and moving.
Amazing lines and scenes
My brother knows me well and he said that my favorite scene would be the one in the museum with Ellie and Joel, and it probably is. It feels like a continuation of the first game and it’s a sweet father-daugther (parent-child and found family tropes are my weakness) moment in which Joel tries to make Ellie happy with the nerdy things he knows she loves. 
I also adore all the moments between Ellie and Dina. They are adorable and they just feel like a real couple, caring about each other and joking and flirting. 
All of the flashbacks were emotional and amazing, but my favorite is probably the last one. When Ellie tells Joel that she wants to forgive him? When he says ‘if I had another chance I would do it all over again?’ I’m getting choked up just thinking about it. I think that’s actually my favorite scene in the game.
Another one of my favorite lines was ‘hey, you’re my people’ from Abby to Lev. It’s so important and such a turning point for Abby, because if it weren’t for Lev she might have killed Ellie and Dina in the theater. She cares so much about him that she keeps going. And that line is the first moment we really see how much that kid meant to her.
Final thoughts
This was probably the longest rant I’ve written here, but The Last of Us was already my favorite game and Part II only topped it for me. The few bad things are greatly overpowered by the countless good things. The game just left a mark on me and I will never forget how it made me smile, laugh, gasp, cry, cringe in fear and overall... just feel in a way nothing had ever made me feel before.
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chinasunsong · 3 years
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Sun Weidong: China and India should jointly follow the path of mutual respect, dialogue and cooperation, mutual benefit and win-win
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On September 23, Sun Weidong, the ambassador to India, was invited to attend the opening ceremony of the 4th China-India High-level Track 2 Dialogue co-sponsored by the Sichuan University School of International Relations, the China South Asia Research Center and the Indian Institute of Defense Research and Analysis. Former Chinese State Councilor Dai Bingguo attended the opening ceremony.
Ambassador Sun Weidong's speech is as follows:
Dear Mr. Dai Bingguo, former State Councilor of China,
Dear scholars from China and India,
ladies and gentlemen,
good afternoon!
It is an honor to attend the 4th China-India High-level Track Two Dialogue. First of all, I want to thank Mr. Dai Bingguo for his continuous dedication to China-India relations. Your profound insights on China-India relations have always inspired us deeply and helped us to clear the "fog" and find the right direction for China-India relations. Thanks to the organizers of the event, Sichuan University and the Institute of Defense Research and Analysis of India, for their meticulous preparations for the dialogue. The participants here today are important experts and scholars, many of whom have previously undertaken important tasks in the diplomatic, military, and economic fields of the two countries. I would like to take this opportunity to have a candid and in-depth exchange of views with you all.
Since last year, China-India relations have faced difficulties that have not been encountered in many years, and they are still at a low ebb. At present, the world has entered a period of turbulent change, the new crown pneumonia epidemic is still spreading, the global economic recovery is weak, and the situation in Afghanistan has undergone a sudden change, which has a major impact on the regional situation. As the largest developing countries and emerging economies, China and India should strengthen coordination and cooperation to jointly fight the epidemic, seek common development and rejuvenation, jointly maintain Asian unity, and jointly promote world peace and development. The status quo of Sino-Indian relations is obviously not in line with the fundamental interests of both parties. Many people of insight in the two countries advocate that China and India should improve relations and push bilateral relations back on track. I would like to share a few views on this.
First, as two major eastern countries, China and India must avoid falling into the trap of outdated Western thinking. According to the so-called realistic theory of international relations in the West, neighboring powers like China and India inevitably regard each other as threats and rivals. Competition and confrontation are the main modes of interaction. Sphere of influence, zero-sum game, and the fight for hegemony are mantras. You gain or lose. You win and I lose is the inevitable result. The Western way of thinking that pursues power politics and the law of the jungle runs counter to the trend of the 21st century of peace, development, cooperation, and win-win, and is unpopular. Even the most powerful country in the world today is doomed to fail if it recklessly intervenes in other countries and tries to impose its own values ​​and social system on others. Afghanistan is the latest example.
As ancient civilizations, China and India have always pursued "university in the world" and "one family in the world", advocating tolerance and harmony, and seeking common ground while reserving differences. We should jointly follow the path of peaceful development so that the people of the two countries can lead a better life, instead of repeating the mistakes of history and taking the evil path of confrontation and conflict between the two major developing countries. China does not agree with the logic of "a strong country must be hegemony". Our historical wisdom is that "a country hegemony must decline." No matter how far it develops, China will never seek hegemony or expand. Some Indians believe that China has become India’s “main threat” and “strategic opponent”. This is a serious strategic misjudgment. If this judgment becomes India’s foreign policy, it may become a “self-fulfilling prophecy”. We don’t want to see.
The second is to look at the relations between the two countries from a comprehensive rather than one-sided perspective. China-India relations are multi-level and multi-dimensional, with contradictions and differences, and more consensus and cooperation. All aspects of bilateral relations should promote each other, rather than restrict each other. We must avoid generalizations, because we can only see the trees but not the forest due to small losses. For example, border areas and peace and tranquility are very important, but this is not the whole of bilateral relations.
China has always viewed China-India relations from a strategic and long-term perspective, and has made unremitting efforts to this end. When India was severely hit by the second wave of the epidemic, China immediately extended a helping hand to overcome difficulties to ensure the smooth supply of medical supplies to India. The pragmatic cooperation between China and India meets the needs of both parties and is highly complementary. Facing the impact of the epidemic, the economic and trade cooperation between the two countries bucked the trend and reached 57.5 billion U.S. dollars in the first half of this year, an increase of 62%. The two countries have extensive common interests on international and regional issues. Just this month, the leaders of the two countries jointly attended the BRICS Leaders’ Meeting and the Shanghai Cooperation Organization Summit to discuss and cope with the current outstanding challenges facing the international region. It takes only one party to break the relationship, and to make the relationship a good one requires the joint efforts of the two countries. China-India relations should be a two-lane road of mutual respect, mutual care of each other's concerns, and win-win cooperation. It should not be a one-way line in which one party makes demands and conditions, and the other party responds.
Third, China and India must adhere to strategic autonomy and take their destiny in their own hands. In the middle of the last century, China and India won national liberation and national independence, and achieved national development. They have important international influence. An important reason is to insist on independence. For a large country like China and India with a population of more than one billion, development can only rely on itself, not others. The primary task of both parties is to achieve development and revitalization and concentrate on doing their own affairs well. At present, out of ideological prejudice and Cold War mentality, some countries are pursuing closed and exclusive "small circles" seeking to contain third parties, encouraging group confrontations and geopolitical games. In fact, containing other countries will not make oneself develop better, and forming gangs will not make oneself safer. Once on board someone else’s ship, you can’t help but take the helm by yourself. Twenty years ago, the United States launched the war in Afghanistan, and many countries boarded the American chariot. 20 years later, what benefits have these countries gained? We should insist on true strategic autonomy, not only in expressing our attitudes, but also in actions.
friends,
This year we solemnly celebrate the 100th anniversary of the founding of the Communist Party of China. President Xi Jinping solemnly declared that we have achieved the first centenary goal, built a moderately prosperous society on the land of China, historically solved the problem of absolute poverty, and are marching towards the second centenary goal of building a modern socialist country in an all-round way. . India is also moving towards its own development goals. Both China and India need a good external environment, especially the surrounding environment. We must proceed from the fundamental interests of the two countries and explore ways for two neighboring big countries to live in harmony and develop and rejuvenate together.
First, China and India should enhance mutual trust and grasp the correct direction of bilateral relations. China and India must lay a solid foundation for mutual trust, insist that they do not pose a threat to each other and provide development opportunities for each other. The two countries are strategic partners rather than competitors. They must carefully maintain mutual trust and do nothing that is not conducive to mutual trust. What is conducive to mutual trust, no matter how difficult it is, we must work hard. It is hoped that the Indian side will respect China's core interests on issues related to Tibet, Taiwan, and South China Sea, be cautious in words and deeds, and abide by its commitments. We must eliminate the interference of mutual trust, refrain from interfering in the other party’s internal affairs, refrain from being instigated by a malicious third party, and refrain from joining a "alliance" or "quasi-alliance" against the other side. To foster an atmosphere of mutual trust, officials, think tank scholars, and the news media should make more rational and constructive voices, not the other way around.
Second, China and India should strengthen dialogue and promote cooperation. Since the beginning of this year, State Councilor and Foreign Minister Wang Yi has met and talked with Foreign Minister Su Jaishen many times. A few days ago, the two sides held a bilateral meeting in Dushanbe. We must strengthen communication and dialogue at all levels and in all fields to promote the gradual improvement of bilateral relations. The economic and trade cooperation between the two countries has great potential, but the cooperation between the two sides has been artificially restricted by some Indians since last year. We should build more bridges instead of walls, and complement each other instead of decoupling. It is hoped that the Indian side will create a fair, just and non-discriminatory business environment for Chinese companies to invest and operate in India. If all Chinese companies are blasted away or squeezed away, what are the benefits to the Indian side? This issue deserves serious consideration by the Indian side. In addition, China and India should strengthen communication and coordination on multilateral affairs, jointly respond to global issues such as the epidemic, disaster prevention and poverty reduction, energy security, climate change, and safeguard the common interests of developing countries.
Third, China and India must properly handle their differences and prevent them from becoming disputes. We should put the border issue in the proper place in our bilateral relations and seek a fair, reasonable and mutually acceptable solution through equal consultation. China has always properly handled the Sino-Indian border issues with a positive attitude, and the current border situation between the two countries is generally developing towards relaxation. It is hoped that the Indian side and the Chinese side will meet each other halfway, promote the continuous stabilization of the situation and gradually shift from emergency response to normalized management and control, and jointly maintain the peace and tranquility of the border area. For differences in other areas, we should also focus on the goal of narrowing rather than expanding, communicate frankly, and seek acceptable solutions.
The current China-India relations are at an important juncture and we need to make the right choice. In the final analysis, China and India should work together to follow the path of mutual respect, dialogue and cooperation, and mutual benefit and win-win results, rather than a "single-plank bridge" of confrontation, suspicion and consumption, and you lose and you lose. I hope you can talk frankly about the current situation facing China-India relations, and make suggestions responsibly, so as to provide advice and suggestions for China-India relations to return to the track of healthy and stable development. Finally, I wish this dialogue a complete success.
Thanks!
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saeyoungs-sunflower · 4 years
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Matchup for @nad-zeta! (Milestone Celebration)
Zeta, my sweet sweet Zeta, here’s your matchup! You have been such an angel, both in your patience and your general loveliness.💛 I’m sorry it took a little longer than expected, but I hope it was worth the wait! It’s pretty long (~3000 words lolllll) so it’s all under the cut. Sorry, I got carried away! :’) xx
So, without further ado, based on the information you gave me I matched you with...
Saeyoung!
take care of my bby pls
I feel like I need to say that I kept going back and forth between him and Zen. Zen was a VERY close second, so I kinda half match you up with him too. That being said, there were some things you mentioned that made me lean more towards Saeyoung, which will be explained below :))
~
Reasoning & General Headcanons!
“🥰 i am a aries, infp, ravenclaw female 🦊”
An Aries you say...?
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Need I say more? Absolute chaotic duo. The energy is buzzing, and the people you hang out are always amused by your shenanigans.
As an INFP, you are caring, loyal, and sensitive, which are traits that I believe Saeyoung would benefit from in a partner. He also hides his true emotions well, so someone with your personality type would be able to pick up on the signs that he is feeling low, even if he tries to hide it. Your loyalty and devotion also helps him feel secure, which considering everything he’s been through, is something I feel he would struggle with, particularly in the early stages of a relationship.
On the flip side, Saeyoung is also incredibly loyal. And whilst he does joke around and tease, he knows how sensitive topics and comments can affect someone, so he is never careless, especially since (as an INFP) you often take things to heart. As a team, you work well together because you view the world slightly differently. You’re an idealist, whereas he’s a realist; you focus on the big picture, whereas he has an incredible attention to detail. This is really helpful in difficult conversations, big decisions, plans for the future etc, because whilst your opinions may differ, you offer the other a different side of the story. You get the best of both worlds!
I don’t know my Harry Potter houses very well, but from my memory and a quick Google search, Ravenclaws value knowledge and are wise, intelligent and witty. Sounds familiar? ;) i mean wise is debatable lol. Your conversations are sooo interesting and natural, because you’re both very intelligent in many ways.
“i am pretty shy and difficult to get to know (apparently it took me 2 months to start opening up to my friends, ooops), i tend to bottle up my emotions, my friends would likely describe me as incredibly stubborn, gentle, kind, over dramatic, goofy and fun loving. I am pretty aloof and blunt, like i will 9/10 times tell you to your face how if feel about you if you ask 🙈once u are part of my inner circle i am playful, teasing, i am an extremely sarcastic person that makes snarky remarks under my breath and my kind of humor is a bit of dark and self deprecating.”
Okay, this was one of the key things that made me match you with Saeyoung. A huge reason why I love Saeyoung so much is that there is a high level of comfort in a relationship with him. By that I mean that he is so open and fun that there is literally zero judgment. Judgment is such a foreign concept to him in this kind of situation. He makes you so comfortable that it’s so easy to be yourself around him, and it doesn’t take long for him to get to know you.
GIRL HE’S THE SAME. The king of bottling up his emotions. This means that y’all know when something is up, you can see the signs. You are understanding of each other, so discussions happen and actions are put into place before things become too much.
Saeyoung sometimes just needs to be told when he’s being a lil prick. You are kind and gentle when he needs it, but also can be blunt with him when it gets silly. I mean, if MC was like you towards the end of his route, we would have got through the whole “i’M tOo dAnGeRoUs gEt aWaY” thing SO much more quickly.
Once you’re comfy with him, you become an absolutely unstoppable force. When he teases you, you tease him back. When he’s being playful, you’re his partner in crime. Y’all are so goofy. Your life is full of laughs and joy with Saeyoung.
Sarcastic comments, dark humour and self-deprecating jokes? Yep that’s also very Saeyoung. Sometimes you two have to reel it in a bit when you’re hanging out with others because YOU’RE OUT OF CONTROL TOGETHER.
“I love my friends and family and will fight anyone who threatens them, although when it comes to me, you can do or say anything to me and i wont do anything (I honestly can't stand up for myself).”
IT’S LIKE HE’S LOOKING IN A MIRROR. Seriously though, he knows the importance of self worth because he knows, firsthand, the damage that can be done when you don’t value yourself and your wellbeing. He makes it his mission to help you see how worthy you are of respect and give you confidence to stand up for yourself. Even if you won’t do it for yourself, he’ll stand up for you. He cares too much about his loved ones to let them be treated wrongly.
He feels how much you love him and your other friends/family which makes him feel so secure, and he also has a phenomenal amount of love in his heart to give and he ain’t afraid to do so.
“I swear like a sailor although I am trying to get that under control, however the road rage is real.”
Finds your road rage and swearing SO amusing. Constantly teasing you about it and winding you up, but it’s all in good fun.
Absolutely has a swear jar for you. No doubt about it.
“You’ve corrupted my good, Catholic ears.” “Saeyoung shut the fuck up.”
“I love nature and animals (i love my lil bunnies and dogs), i love working out/going to the gym #gym is life”
I mean, we know he adores cats, and I imagine he loves other animals too.
I also imagine he loves camping, and I don’t even know why. He just gives me camping vibes. Weekends away spent in nature, sleeping in a tent and sitting round a fire in the evenings are pretty common for you.
I know this is ~controversial~ topic in the fandom, but I am of the opinion that Saeyoung also works out.
Do I think he’s completely ripped? No, probably not. But he’s strong, lean at the very least. Even Jaehee admits it! He makes working out so much fun and it’s always a bit of a laugh.
“i enjoy cooking (i am now officially a chef), wine tasting (fancy way of saying getting very tipsy of different wines most nights), spending time with friends (especially if there is tea to be spilt) although i do need lots of alone time to recharge my social battery”
The first time he tasted your food, he almost cried. Poor boi lived off eating crisps and soda for God knows how long.
“Wait, you’re not meant to constantly feel like you're gonna throw up? Food is meant to have...flavour???”
Help him
Saeyoung is pretty social, but also needs time to recharge like you, though he can go a bit longer than you and doesn’t easily get drained by social interactions. This may seem like a problem when you spend time with friends, but it’s actually such a blessing. If you’re feeling exhausted when socialising, he knows and will “take the wheel” if you will. There’s nothing worse than trying to keep a conversation going or seeming upbeat when you literally don’t have the energy, so Saeyoung is there to help you out. He’s also super good at politely and subtly taking you out of those situations if you are super drained and need to recharge.
He’s also such a gossip so if you got tea to spill he’s ready to hear it, and you know he ALWAYS has tea to spill. Sneaky man
“i like conspiracies, reading, writing (Fanfics and im busy with my Masters in nutrition >“<), rom coms, and  sleeping. As much as i love spending time outdoor i also enjoy lazing around the house being a lazy potato.”
Discussions about conspiracies over dinner lol. He is in possession of some...top secret information, so those conversations are very interesting and eye opening ;)
He LOVES to read your writing. It literally doesn’t matter what it’s about, he finds it truly fascinating. It’s a little glimpse into who you are, and it’s something you created!!! By yourself!!!! HE LOVES THAT. Always impressed with what you write, every time. He’s so proud.
ROM COMS WHILST CUDDLING ON THE COUCH
He’s a cryer, he loves rom coms.
He works super hard, so he’s always down to have a lazy day with you!!
“I definitely zone out and daydream all the freaken time and tend to blush easily which i hate 🙈 i definitely dont like crowds and loud sounds (ie you will never find me in a club). I am a picky eater despite my degree in cooking (i basically only eat candy, carbs and protein)”
He. loves. Making. You. blush. I’m sorry, but it’s one of his favourite things. He thinks it’s so adorable, so prepare for all the teasing, lewd jokes and general flirtiness that’ll get your cheeks burning ;)
He’s not keen on crowds either, so that’s not a problem!! I imagine he occasionally goes on night’s out with the bois (and by bois I mean usually just Zen and Yoosung LOL) but he’s not often out until super late, and he’s super respectful of you. Would never ask you to do something or go somewhere that makes you uncomfortable.
“i love cuddles although i look like someone that wouldn’t. Ive been told i come across as calm and confident, while in truth on the inside i am really scared and insecure.   I am incredibly awkward when it comes to boys and have been told my sarcastic comments are x100 when i talk to them (oops).”
CUDDLE MONSTER. I actually think he’s the biggest cuddler in the RFA. Controversial I know, but damn Saeyoung loves a cuddle. He’s a spontaneous cuddler. Like it doesn’t matter what the situation is, if you need a cuddle or he just fancies one, he’ll find a way.
He sees right through your calmness and confidence, because he’s exactly the same. This puts him in the perfect position to reassure you and lift you up. He’s a great hype man!
He finds your awkwardness adorable, and your sarcastic comments just make him love you even more! He has a good sense of humour and doesn’t take things too seriously if they don’t need to be, so he’s constantly laughing with you and easing your mind in the very early stages of your relationship.
“I am very go with the flow, and i never burn my bridges 🙈 i am very forgive and forget🦊, like no matter how badly you hurt me.”
Based on what happens on his route, it’s very handy that you are a forgiving person hahah
But again, if Saeyoung thinks you are being treated wrongly and being hurt, he will stand up for you.
His dedication to protecting the ones he loves is STRONG. I mean, look at his relationship with Saeran and the way he is constantly looking out for you in ALL routes.
Of course, he won’t say or do anything to that person if that makes you uncomfortable. Instead, he will constantly reassure you of your self-worth and remind you that you deserve better, but will also support the decisions you make.
If you want to forgive and forget, he will respect that, even if he thinks differently.
“What am i looking for in a potential partner?.... well i definitely think i need someone that could bring me out my shell initially, also someone who isn't too sensitive cause like i said i can be super sarcastic and my jokes kinda match that (like in my family we show out affection for each other via playful insults and savage comments)😂😂”
As I stated above, I think Saeyoung is the best person to help bring you out of your shell. There’s no judgment and no shame with this man.
I find that someone being unapologetically themself is SO contagious, and Saeyoung is exactly that - unapologetically himself.
We’ve all seen his humour, he doesn’t seem to be particularly sensitive either so you’re all good there hahaha. Obviously everyone does have their limits, so whilst their are topics/jokes that would probably make him uncomfortable (e.g. stuff relating to Saeran), overall, he’s chill and ALWAYS ready to joke around with you.
The roast battle is so real with you two LOL
“i kinda want someone stable, hard working, decisive, ambitious and who can push me out of my confort zone and vice versa.🦋”
He goofs around, but there’s no denying that this man works HARD.
Once he leaves the agency and starts his new life with you, I can imagine him being super ambitious and also aiming for stability.
His life before had been so restrictive yet so uncertain. He had to do what he was told, but never knew what was just around the corner.
This makes me think that he would crave the stability and certainty that he never had (a ‘normal’ life, if you will), but also he’d want to try so many things that he hadn’t before. He strikes me as a ‘go big or go home’ kinda guy, so I think it’s safe to say that he would be ambitious in many ways.
The only thing I don’t think he ticks the box on is decisiveness, at least not at the beginning. I think he usually knows what he wants, but rarely acts on that.
“It’s up to you”, “whatever you want” and “I don’t mind” are very common phrases for him lol. I think he would learn to be more decisive once he gets comfortable. I also think he has his moments of assertiveness though, when he’s in the right mood.
“Also someone who is family oriented and loving (someone that can cuddle me when im having a bad day)☺ and someone who can make me laugh, cause i love joking around so i kinda think i need someone who could match that🌻”
SAEYOUNG. IS. SUCH. A. FAMILY. MAN.
Again, look at what he’s done for Saeran and how deeply he cares for and loves him. A ‘normal’ family was something that was absent in his life, so when he has his own family (whether that be a found family or one he made) he would cherish that so strongly, maybe more than most.
SAEYOUNG. IS. A. CUDDLE. MONSTER.
He could be working at his desk and suddenly think “you know what? It’s snuggle time” and then he would search the house for you to give you The Snuggle™
Again, he’s also VERY observant and his attention to detail is impeccable, so he can instantly tell if you’re having a bad day and will act accordingly - aka SNUGGLE TIME
I mean, need I say more? If you want someone who makes you laugh, Saeyoung is the guy. There is never a dull day when he’s around, and the house is always filled with laughter!
So yeah....that’s my reasoning :’)) now onto your very own drabble!! This is all yours, so if there’s anything you’d like me to change or add, PLEASE let me know!! I’m more than happy to edit anything to make it more personalised for you, just shoot me a message and I’ll be on it, same goes for anything I’ve said above!!🥰
~
Drabble!
“Saeyoung! Can you come here a second?”
You called out to him from the kitchen, stirring from a pot whilst its contents quietly bubbled away. You could hear the music blaring from his headphones all the way from the other room, with the occasional hum or drum on his desk. Evidently, he hadn’t heard you.
“SAEYOUNG CHOI GET YOUR FINE ASS IN HERE.”
The music ceased, followed by rapid pattering as he darted into the room, nearly skidding round the doorway. 
“I heard ‘fine ass’ and here I am,” he smirked, sauntering over to you and snaking his strong, secure arms around your middle. He swayed you from side to side, planting a wet kiss on your cheek, much to your dismay. Saeyoung merely chuckled, resting his chin on your shoulder, “What do you need, witch lady?”
“Why ‘witch lady’?”
“Well, whatever you’re cooking is giving me witchy vibes. It looks like a potion in a cauldron. Look at you with your double double toil and trouble-OW! Don’t pinch me!”
“Sorry, it’s a witch thing,” you winked, spinning around in his grip so you were face-to-face. “You sure you’re not the witch? You do have the nose for it.”
“I’ve also got the dress and hat in the attic, shall I go put it on?”
“Try this for me first.” You held the wooden spoon out to him as he took a sip, chuckling at the way his brows furrowed in thought.
He smacked his lips a few times, hummed then finally looked back to you, “It’s good.”
“That’s it? That’s all you got?”
“You do realise that my taste buds have essentially been burned off by chips and soda, right? I have no idea if something’s bad or not.”
“You’re right. I should call Jumin.”
“You can’t,” he informed, his smirk growing ever wider as he moved towards the snack cupboard, ���Mr Han has a date tonight.”
The spoon clattered against the counter, your mouth agape, “You’re shitting me.”
“That’s another coin in the swear jar.” Saeyoung chucked a packet of candy in your direction, though it only hit you in the face before falling unceremoniously onto the kitchen floor, “I think we need to get your reflexes checked, babe.”
“Tell me everything.”
He took a seat on a breakfast stool and chortled as you leaned over the counter, eyes showing your eagerness to hear the gossip. And he was more than happy to provide, “He appears to be really into her. Like, really into her. She seems to just get him, you know? I could hear his smile down the phone when he told me about her earlier.”
“Earlier? Why are you only just telling me this now?!”
“Do you wanna hear the rest of it or not?”
Huffing, you perched on the seat next to him, stealing a piece of his candy despite his look of horror, “Okay, well where did he meet such a woman?”
“You’re never gonna believe it.”
“Try me.”
Saeyoung was enjoying himself far too much. He couldn’t wait another moment to witness your reaction, “She’s Zen’s co-star.”
“NO.”
“YES.”
The tea had been spilt, and things were about to get very interesting within the RFA.
Your eyes were glued to his as he continued to disclose the details. At some point you had wrapped your arm around his, his other hand encompassing yours. He abruptly stopped halfway through describing the first encounter, causing you to quirk an eyebrow impatiently, “What?”
“Do you smell burning?”
“...Fuck.”
“And another one for the swear jar.”
~
@nad-zeta​ there we go my love, I hope you enjoyed your matchup!! I am so grateful for your support, it never fails to make me smile when I see you pop up in my notifs. You are beautiful, kind, bright person and you deserve the world. Thank you again for all you’ve done and all you do💛💛 Take care of yourself, my friend! xxx
(Note for other readers: I usually don’t do matchups, this was for a special occasion! I doubt I’ll open up requests for them later on, but never say never!)
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popwasabi · 4 years
Text
What “The Dark Knight” says about our bad politics
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Waaay back in the summer of 2008, me and my dad drove up to Northern California to attend San Jose State University’s freshman orientation.
It was a long drawn out process where first-year students basically were told and shown a bunch of things they would forget and relearn by their first day anyways and culminated with all of us spending one night in the campus dorms so we could all get a taste of the “campus life” experience.
I wanted it to end badly for a couple reasons. Being an introvert, I was not comfortable sharing a room with anyone, let alone a stranger, for a night but more importantly, I was being kept from the biggest movie premiere of the year that day: “The Dark Knight.”
As soon as I woke up the next morning, I rushed my dad to find the nearest theater and purchased tickets immediately for a late-night screening. I was already a huge fan of “Batman Begins” but every trailer to Christopher Nolan’s epic follow-up indicated we were in for an even bigger blockbuster than before and I was beyond pumped.
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(Me getting the fuck off campus to watch “The Dark Knight” that day.)
Two and a half hours later I left the theater blown away by the experience. “The Dark Knight” was everything, at the time, I was hoping for in a comic book movie; angsty, dark, edgy (all things I thought I was as a teen), cinematically sharp, thrilling, a fantastic score once again by the legendary Hans Zimmer, and fulfilled just about every fanboy wet dream I had at the time for a perfect Batman movie.
To this day it remains the most satisfying theatrical experience I’ve ever had seeing a movie, not that it’s my favorite movie of all-time anymore, mind you, but that I have never gone into a movie with such high expectations and had them blown away quite like that since.
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(Conversely, this^ was my most disappointing experience...)
I’m a different person now, of course. If you were to wipe my memory of the film and had to watch it again today I doubt I would have the same fanboygasm I had then as the cynical 30-year-old I am now but I’ll argue that “The Dark knight” still remains a high mark, if not the standard, for comic book movies today.
That said, parts of this film have definitely not aged well. Visually the film still holds up, the action is still exciting, the performances are all stellar (though Bale’s Batman voice is still bad) but what hasn’t aged well, for me, are the movie’s politics.
“The Dark Knight” is, of course, a post 9/11 movie, in fact, it’s arguably the definitive one as its pop-cultural footprint dwarfs pretty much all within its sub-genre. This Nolan sequel deals heavily in themes of terrorism with its iconic villain The Joker, played maniacally by the late great Heath ledger, wreaking havoc across Gotham with various explosive devices. Though the Clown Prince is more an anarchist than someone with an ideology, like those in Al Qaeda or the Taliban, the results of his beliefs/non-beliefs are more or less the same; cause pandemonium and fear in the masses. Batman, representing the power of justice and order, does battle with this in a war to save Gotham’s soul and again this is still a damn entertaining and thrilling story.
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(Seriously, it’s still a rock solid entry in the comic book movie genre.)
But where the film’s 9/11 politics become problematic is toward the end of the film when the Joker begins his final act to plunge Gotham into unstoppable chaos. Batman becomes desperate; The Joker has eluded him at every turn, always two steps ahead of him, escaping justice no matter what Bruce Wayne does so he concocts a plan to finally to locate and stop the Joker for good.
He creates an elaborate sonar system using every cell phone in Gotham, effectively creating a massive surveillance state to spy on its citizens in order to locate the Joker.
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(And it’s the only time we have ever got the real Batman eyes on screen, damn it!)
Lucius Fox, played by Morgan Freeman, appropriately calls this out telling him he’s wrong and that he cannot support this but Batman insists that it’s the only way. Fox reluctantly agrees and tells him he’ll resign once this is over as he can’t morally support such a system. The sonar, of course, works and Batman is able to stop the Clown Prince once and for all and upon Fox entering his name into the sonar computer the program dissolves and is deleted presumably for good.
This is of course to wash Batman’s hands of this deed to the audience. Our protagonist knows this is wrong, the audience is told it is wrong but by ending the surveillance he shows he would never abuse such a program, that sometimes good men have to do terrible things to defeat evil and that makes it ok.
For years, as a bleeding heart liberal (at the time) who grew up in the Bush years but loved the hell out of this movie, I tried to reconcile with this part of the story because Batman was the hero. I thought maybe this kind of action is ok because if the “good guy” is in charge bad stuff is fine because he/she won’t abuse such power. That’s real justice, right?
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The problem is in the real world, at the top, there really aren’t any good guys and they are counting on you to believe that they are when they get a hold of such power because that’s how we are programmed.
The Patriot Act, which was the signature Bush-era reform post 9/11, created our current surveillance state. In the interest of national security and ensuring those “dern turrists don’t go killing lil’ Timmy riding his tricycle out in Des Moines, Iowa” our elected leaders, both republican and democratic (make no mistake), effectively signed away our constitutional rights to “ensure our safety” by spying on us basically without warrants. The proponents proudly claimed its necessity in fighting the “War on Terrorism” and those naysayers either shouldn’t worry “if you have nothing to hide” or worse were un-American Taliban sympathizers.
For progressives, of course, this was an evil violation of our civil liberties but for many conservatives, this wasn’t a big deal. They are just trying to keep us safe after all. 
But conveniently ignored by many on the left still today is the complicity they had in bringing about this era in warrantless surveillance. Yes, this policy started under Bush, of course, but it continued to be re-upped through the Obama administration and the Trump administration, not to mention revolving majorities in the House and Senate, showing no matter who was in charge they all liked the idea of keeping an eye on all of us with or without reason.
Considering the Patriot Act was made to win the “War on Terrorism” our leaders were never going to relinquish this power anyways because you can’t win a war on terrorism. Terrorism is not a country or a people, it’s an ideology behind many different ideologies. The US, no matter how you see it, be it as liberators or oppressors, will always have enemies and that’s all the reason they need to keep this power it seems.
Having the data on our lives mined like oil can easily be used against us in a variety of ways regardless of if any of us have terroristic or even criminal intentions. But for many in this country, it was only a problem if the wrong guy wielded that power. As soon as their “good guy” got in though, suddenly it was no big deal. I wonder why...
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“The Dark Knight” puts forth a problematic view on who can and should wield supreme power, that even terrible choices can be made as long as the “right” person is the one making them.
Liberals are notorious for justifying them when it’s one of them who does it.
It’s a lie. A lie that both parties use to their advantage because they want you believe everything they do can be justified because you happen to be a part of their party; the “good guys” once again. But there is something extra cynical about the way liberals wield it as they parade themselves around as paragons and moral pillars against the Jokers of the Republican party.
For all the platitudes liberals give, that would make some superhero speeches seem benign, they wear masks about as well as the vigilantes do but not for the same reasons. When confronted by this blatant hypocrisy, liberal voters justify all kinds of horrible things as long as the other “bad guy” isn’t the one doing it. For all the shit Bush gets, and rightfully so, for plunging us into a military, financial, and humanitarian quagmire in the Middle East, Obama gets almost zero real pushback by liberals for effectively drone bombing the hell out of the same people. During these past three years Trump has more or less allowed ICE to run rampant on immigrant communities sure and liberals have been critical, again as they should, but who made the cages they were thrown into and who deported more of them during his first three years in office than Trump did?
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(And once again, and I can’t emphasize this enough, Andrew Cuomo is NOT your fucking friend...)
Liberals often like to present themselves as the moral purveyors of good in the face of conservative opposition and they use it to their advantage to more or less do many of the same foul things those with R’s next to their name do. Sure, not all their actions are equally as evil but even then, we rarely truly hold either of our leaders feet to the fire because we believe their actions are somehow better because they have a “D” next to their name.
These horrific policies and actions will never see justice as long as we keep justifying them because the “right” person is behind them.
No, this is not an all sides are equally bad take. That discussion requires more nuance and for a different time, but I will say both sides are varying degrees of bad that should be taken seriously instead of not at all and can’t be pushed aside again and again and again because “the other guys are worse.” 
We are running into the same situation today as our presidential election features a credibly accused rapist, sexual predator, who supports Bush-era tax cuts, who takes money from major corporate lobbyists, who is against Medicare for All, has open disdain for millenials, and not only supports but openly bragged about the aforementioned The Patriot Act.
Hmmm, sounds an awful lot like someone we know, huh?
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You could argue that one of these two men mitigates, or even vastly mitigates, harm if in office and I’m not here to necessarily scold you for making what you feel is morally the least awful choice but the point still remains; we are justifying evil again because our “good guy” is in charge.
Being liberal, just on its own, does not vastly minimize the problematic nature of a bad person.
Regardless of how you feel about this election and what choice you plan to make this November (and again, I’m not here to tell you what to do), bad things and bad policies will be continued to be enacted by bad people because that’s what choices we’ve been given. There isn’t a good one and the most vulnerable will be hurt the most by it regardless of who wins. There is a reason so many are disillusioned with voting and it’s not just voter suppression laws.
I can already hear some of you screaming “OH MER GERD pURiTy TeStS,” but this is far more cynical a standard we have than simply choosing a less than perfect candidate. Many are already making rather tone-deaf comments about people being “privileged” for choosing not to compromise their morals anymore. What’s “privileged” is voting for the guy who will do less harm for you but ultimately still disproportionately harm more people of color no matter who is in office.  
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(The country and the world can really begin to truly heal when a Democrat is in charge of one of these Freedom Machines once again!)
Yes, I might agree that one is probably a net positive for the world at this point but to act like someone choosing to not participate anymore in what is effectively a never-ending cycle I can’t say I blame them either. At some point, our society has to draw a real line in the sand on these things with our leaders and force a more moral standard for our government instead of the status quo.
We can’t go on this endless “pragmatic” path picking “the lesser of two evils” until we gradually just become evil. You can make the argument that maybe the time isn’t now, and you might be right but when? These folks at the top are COUNTING on us accepting circumstances and justifying terrible beliefs and actions over and over again because of the state of our politics.
“The Dark Knight” believes that sometimes bad things must be done to defeat evil but the real world can be so much less cynical if we stopped compromising on our beliefs. It’s not entirely too late for us to do the right thing. We can’t go on forever letting bad behavior go because the “good guy” will be the one doing it instead of the other one.
Taking money from corrupt billionaires is wrong. Extra-judicially drone bombing the Middle East endlessly is wrong. Throwing migrants in cages like fucking animals is wrong. Rape and sexual assault are wrong. Mass warrantless surveillance is wrong. Doesn’t matter if its Batman or fucking Superman doing any of these things; immoral behavior cannot and should not be ever justified.
Otherwise, we really will live long enough to see ourselves become the villain...
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Looking forward to the comments on this one...
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lunnamars · 4 years
Text
Spiral
First of all: As I simply fell in love with this couple again recently, I decided that I could contribute a little despite my zero writing experience. So I hope you guys forgive me for any mistakes, especially because english is not my first language! ;)
Second of all: this whole story happens after Punk Hazard, but it is not related to any canon arc.
Disclaimer: obviously, I don't own anything on One Piece because if it was, Luffy and Nami would be together, just like Zoro and Tashigi. So, there it is.
You can also read on AO3 or FFNET
“I admire you, Roronoa.”
Zoro would be lying if he said he wasn't surprised. Tashigi, the extremely prideful Marine, saying such words to the pirate she supposedly hated so much. Ah, but he was very much surprised indeed. But Zoro was better than that. He would show none of his surprise neither would acknowledge the very strange feeling that bloomed in his chest.
Oh, no. He would do no such thing. Because not thinking about anything remotely related to her it's what he's been trying to do since she joined momentarily the Strawhats. Nope, another lie. Since Punk Hazard probably.
Or since Loguetown.
And he would be lying once again if he said he had succeeded. 
But no matter, nobody has to know. Especially the copycat.
Then he just merely glanced at her. The swordswoman simply stared straight ahead, speaking as if alone, whispering words in the wind. The weather was very pleasant and the horizon even more beautiful than usual due to the approaching sunset, creating an amazing scenario. They both sat at the deck after a hard workout day (because he said they could push a bit more since the weather was nice), in a welcoming silence, watching the view and the crew playing with Luffy.
“Gotta admit that I never expected to hear those kind of words from you, Glasses.”
“I know. But it's the truth for a while.”
She continued to watch Nami shaking Luffy for jumping over her while the girl read. Zoro couldn't quite put his finger on how that relationship worked. But, once again, what the hell does he know about that kind of thing. Love is not exactly what he was looking for - at least, not until he achieves his life goal.
“You saved me in Punk Hazard and accepted to train me, but I never got the chance to properly thank you. So I thought it'd be nice by telling you some truth.”
“It's not like I asked that, stupid.”
“I just thought I should tell you, you jerk.”
“Haaa?? Who are you calling jerk??”
Tashigi just laughed and the sound made the strange feeling show its face again, almost as if the laugh he provoked made him proud. Their relationship has been following along those lines - always bickering (and Zoro would never voice how much fun it was to annoy her), her continuous insistence on competing with him any free time she had, both staying in comfortable silence or Tashigi laughing at him for some reason. Especially because of the boy's lack of sense of direction.
Sometimes, he'd be influenced by her laugh and would, eventually, laugh at himself too.
But now, Glasses had a sad look that the swordsman refused to accept in her face. A crestfallen expression definitely didn't match her and he decided that he didn't like to have been the possible cause of it.
And with that, Zoro felt a pang in his heart. He knew he had been rude, but it seems he couldn't act properly around her most of the time. Initially, he thought the reason for that was because of her similarity with Kuina and that it never ceased to bring back sad memories, so he simply could not face Tashigi. But nowadays? He had absolutely no idea of what it could be. So he’d take turns between having these stupid outbursts or staying silent. Something tells him that he was better with his mouth shut sometimes.
However, the moment she asked him to train her, he decided to keep his mouth shut for a few minutes out of astonishment, when, in fact, he should have said something or at least thought twice before answering. Zoro remembers how she bowed politely while making her request like he was someone super important and was on a whole nother level.
I mean, they were on different levels, but that doesn't mean she couldn't get better. Honestly, Zoro actually believed she could get better indeed because she had so much focus and was so persistent - characteristics that reminded him of a version of himself as a kid, always wanting to beat Kuina.
Right off the bat, he denied her request claiming that the had no patience or interest whatsoever. He stood up and prepared to leave, but turned around to glance quickly at her before fleeing inside the ship. And he swears his heart simply stopped at the sight of Tashigi's bleak expression. Instantly, Zoro knew what she was thinking.
Surely, Tashigi took his answer as a sign that she was too weak - and not because she was a woman, which is something he was able to get the hell out of her head with so much struggle - and that even he wouldn't be able to help her become stronger. Zoro waited for the moment when she would try to bite his head off, saying how stupid and unpleasant he was, but no sound reached the swordsman's ears.
The girl just nodded and left without a word. And he didn't feel quite well.
Zoro didn't see her until the time she left for her night shift. She still didn't seem at peace which made him start to get really worried. Had he really crossed the line? The green-haired man thought he was surely getting crazy by the day with her stay on the Sunny, because he hated the fact she was his first thought in the morning and the last before bed. And suddenly, he realized what bothered him at the moment she made her request.
He was Kuina in this situation and she was the small Zoro from years ago.
He was the one she wanted to reach, just as he wanted to reach his dear friend as a child.
Zoro sighed heavily and walked in her direction, sitting at her side and not receiving even a glance in his direction. He knew she was not angry per se - which, particularly, was something new and troublesome the fact he was able to read her little by little and that definitely didn't make him happy - because judging by her frown, he knew she was racking her brain to find a way to convince him to train her. 
The swordsman gave a crooked smile and tried to hide the good feeling of being really admired by someone, especially by Glasses.
He acted like an idiot, he knows that. It wasn't needed that much of time in her company to know how much of pride she had to swallow to make a request like that. And deciphering that made him gaze almost affectionate at her, even if against his own will.
But only when she wasn't looking.
Finally, he decided to break the silence and warn her he'd be waiting for her at the deck at 5 a.m. And she didn't dare to be late because he does not take it easy on trainings.
And cross his heart, but he has never seen such a beautiful smile in his whole life. His heart stopped on its tracks again and that was starting to piss him off. If this continues to happen every time she does something different around him (because, like, this smile could not be directed at him, it's simply not possible), he would definitely treat it with Chopper.
And at 5 a.m., there was a Tashigi waiting for him with a sword in hand and the most determined expression he has seen on anyone's face recently.
She has kept waiting for him religiously for the past three months.
At first, their relationship was a bit complicated - Zoro was very rough around the edges and Tashigi was too proud. The trainings always ended in a heated discussion between them, followed by a whole afternoon without talking to each other until a wild Luffy (being typical Luffy) somehow would making them talk civilly again at night.
But the day the green-haired man simply snapped at her without thinking and screamed at her he was trying to teach her the same way he would teach any person, whether being a man or woman, but she couldn't put her stupid pride aside because he was not underestimating her and that he truly believed she would continue being an idiot, but a stronger idiot - was the moment where their relationship change slightly, but deeply.
He knew the whole crew was staring at both of them, but Zoro couldn't focus on anything else but the annoying woman in front of him. Why the hell couldn't she understand he was capable of being friendly and thoughtful? 
Okay, fine, calling her idiot wouldn't help that much.
Tashigi merely stared at him for a couple of seconds without blinking and momentarily Zoro thought she would just brush aside everything he said and just focus on the word idiot. So, imagine his surprise when she simply bowed and apologized. When she straightened, she just unsheathed and held the sword firmly in both hands, telling him in a serious tone that she would no longer contest him, and that, please, do not give up on her.
And since that day, they never argued again during training. Out of training hours, however, they did because, you see, Tashigi was really stubborn and he was a person who got angry easily. But nothing major. Zoro started to feel that their relationship reminded him the one he has with Sanji, but somehow, he knew it was pretty different.
Zoro firmly believed it had nothing to with the fact that he thought she looks incredibly cute when pouting every time he was right about something. But at the same time, he started to consider this option, since he just wanted to beat the shit out of the ero-cook when he acted like that.
The same way he wanted to punch Sanji when he drooled over Tashigi for too long, especially when Nami or Robin didn’t give him the time of the day. The marine was too nice to shoo the pervert away and he knew it was mainly due to the fact she thought she owed the crew so much for saving her from certain execution. 
Ah, there’s that, but it’s a story for another time. The swordsman couldn’t even remember the events without his stomach churning. The memory of her in chains and with a rope around her neck still haunted his dreams. And unfortunately, every time he ended up remembering, an uncontrollable rage would take over - exactly the same fury he felt at when he saw her so defenseless. Well, at least it helped him defeat the enemy faster than ever.
Ever since, fueled by her strong sense of justice, Tashigi believed she owed them her life and would do everything in her reach to repay them.
Only she had already paid, the sword nerd. But she didn’t realize that just the fact of being sent to execution for protecting them of an unfair capture made by the Marine corrupt pigs was already payment enough.
And gradually, the pair got used to each other’s presence and Zoro judged that a sort of friendship has been formed. Or a truce. But he doesn’t know and also didn’t want to know. If possible, he wanted to stay far away from her and forget that somehow she really seemed to belong to the Strawhats. 
With him.
Probably it was because of that approximation that Tashigi was able to say she admired him. He also knew that she must have struggled a lot to swallow her pride once again, but she was too sincere to keep that information to herself. And kind! Zoro couldn’t understand where that much kindness came from honestly. After she slowly overcame her inherent revulsion that came with the word “pirate”, the swordsman saw a very different side of the marine.
Kind. Kind with the crew, kind to the people they met on their adventures, stupidly kind with Chopper, because let’s be honest, it’s too freaking hard to not like the reindeer.
Kind to him.
After so much time getting frustrating expressions and angry scowls from her, the kindness made him not knowing what to do. Angry Tashigi? Sure, Zoro knew how to deal with that. Tashigi being stubborn because they disagreed? No problem, piece of cake. Tashigi babbling about different swords they find when visiting some new island? Completely cool, he even liked to hear what she had to say.
But Tashigi being nice to him? What now, how to go from there? Does he try to be kind too? Does he stop with the obvious attitude of dancing around each other, always far away but so close? Or does he just realize that her eyes are so pretty in the sunset, even with the glasses and her lips seemed so soft on her pale skin- 
“Nee, Roronoa.”
Perfect timing to drag him out of the spiral of thoughts he was getting into. A very dangerous spiral that, if acknowledged, there would be no turning back.
“Hm?”
“You want to become the greatest swordsman in the world because of that friend of yours that looks like me, right?”
Her voice turned so soft and that took him out of the dangerous spiral he was almost setting one foot in and led him to Kuina.
And then back to Tashigi. They were not the same, he knew. The physical resemblance eventually faded over the years, even though Zoro was still astonished of how could it be possible for a stranger to look like so much like his late friend. What kind of cruel joke the fate was playing?
But then again, they were not the same. Not emotionally. Kuina really struggled with her swordsman identity because she was a woman. Tashigi was proud of being a swordsman and a woman, despite her thinking that everyone would always look down on her.
Zoro made a mental note to ask her about this trauma. Where it came from, why she can’t get over it, who did this to her. And if it was someone, he’d like very much to know if he was alive so he could beat this person to a pulp.
But with that, he has just set a foot in the spiral. And oh boy, how scared he was. If not for the years of mastering his composure, he’d have jumped out of spite when he realized she had turned around to stare at him, probably waiting for an answer.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to intrude on your personal affairs.”
Tashigi gave an apologetic nod and turned the attention to the gentle waves in the sea. Zoro continued to stare at her and noticed how extremely welcoming that scene was. For unknown reasons, the swordsman felt at peace, the same way he felt when meditating.
“Yeah, that’s right. I promised her before she died. That’s because of her that I carry Wado Ichimonji too.”
The marine turned toward him so quickly as if she had sensed some danger and her eyes widened. She probably didn’t expect him to answer. Zoro is aware that he’s a closed person and the biggest example of that is the fact that no one on the crew knows his true story.
“This is… very noble of you, Roronoa. I’m completely sure you will make it. And I think your friend believed in you too.”
And there it was again - the most beautiful smile he has ever seen was, once again, directed at him. That made him feel somewhat… special. And he realized he wanted to be someone special to her. He wanted that smile to be his and no one else’s. Did she smile like that to another man? Was this just an ordinary smile she offered to any kind person like her?
Did she think about him when they are not together?
So, without looking back, Zoro put both feet inside the spiral and went down. He was not good with words, but a little better with actions and she was so close so close and she reached her hand to rest on top of his, squeezing lightly to assure the words that just fell out of her mouth and now the smile faded slightly and she was looking at him with so so bright eyes and Brook was playing a soft and slow song somewhere on top of the Sunny-
That was a lot going on for him, so he decided that screw it and hugged her. But it wasn’t a light hug, it was strong like he really needed that. It was a hug that screamed thank you thank you thank you. He didn’t even know what the hell he was thanking for because all of the Strawhats already believed in him and his dream. He didn’t need the faith of no else. Is it the fact of the resemblance again and that made him think it was Kuina’s ghost uttering those words? 
No. It wasn’t. While holding her, he was sure that Tashigi’s belief mattered because she was just and true. And that meant it was a faith completely free of second thoughts or hidden meanings. It was real. It was sincere. Despite their differences - the whole issue of pirates and marines - she believed he was worthy of the title he would eventually achieve.
He realized that deep down she didn’t admire him for what he would be in the future. She admired him because he is also an example of perseverance. And something tells him that even if he did not become the greatest swordsman in the world, she would still want to reach him. And surpass him someday.
Zoro noted that he wouldn’t mind if it was her.
She was deserving of the title too.
Then he continued to hold her with his arms firmly on her back, being careful not to hurt her and completely enveloped her, pressing her against his chest so she could stay closer closer closer. 
Has anyone already hugged her like this? Has any man gotten so close to her to the point of being able to feel the heat emanating from her? Zoro thinks so. Because it was not possible for a woman this honest to not have found a man as just as her. But reluctantly, he was surprised when he thought he didn't want her to find anyone.
Meeting someone means she would have to leave and he didn’t want her to go away, especially in another man’s arms. He got used to her presence during practice and even during the meditation. This was nice. It didn’t have to change.
So engrossed in his own reflection that he almost missed the moment when Tashigi returned the hug with the same firmness. She made space to better accommodate her head on his shoulder and his heart just flipped and oh my God, he's sure she heard that because it was going to come out of his chest anytime.
And all his sanity went out the window the moment she turned her face to rest in the crook of his neck and he felt her breath. Suddenly a shock ran through Zoro's spine and breathing became very difficult. The shock gave way to a warm feeling and the swordsman needed to do something. Either shove her away or bring her closer.
Both options were equally dangerous. 
“Roronoa.”
“Zoro.” 
“Ahn?”
“You can call me Zoro.”
She took a deep breath again and his brain was beginning to form incoherent ideas. He needed to do something.
“Zoro.”
That was enough for him to give up on any insecurity. Zoro. She spoke his name in such a soft way and that awakened something inside him that he never dared to analyze. He needed to do something.
Zoro knew what he wanted to do.
“Tashigi.”
Reluctantly, he pushed her way enough to look into her eyes because he needed to know if what he was about to do was welcomed, if it was right, if she'd hate him for the rest of his life. He didn't know if they were already this close or if he had leaned in unconsciously, but they were so close to the point that their noses were almost touching.
She didn't stop staring at him at any moment, but he couldn't decide if he kept looking at her eyes or her lips. Zoro didn't know if he should blame the weather or the slow and peaceful song that came out of Brook's violin or the soft sound of the waves crashing in the ocean or if it was simply her breath so close, but he decided to throw caution to the wind.
Zoro gave Tashigi enough time to move away if she wished so.
She didn't.
Then Zoro closed the distance and kissed her. The world stopped spinning. The noise of the waves faded away, Brook's music was just a distant noise, the crew's noise seemed to be muffled, the birds flying close to the ship made no sound, the wind itself seemed to have gone silent, leaving only their breath and the noise of his own heart beating so loud that now he was sure she could hear it.
But he wanted more. Way more. Just brushing his lips over hers was not enough. Zoro needed her closer closer closer until there was nothing separating their bodies and their breath was one. Hesitantly, he licked her lip as if he was asking permission and in the blink of an eye, Tashigi gave her consent.
Right at that moment, there was nothing or anyone in the world that would stop him from kissing her like there was no tomorrow. At first, he tried to be as calm as possible, but after Tashigi bit his bottom lip, his world came crashing down. Zoro didn't have enough self-control and what he wanted most was to just kiss her senseless. Even though he was a guy with zero experience in this area, his instincts normally worked perfectly.
And it seemed right.
Even if this kiss wasn't the most correct one, he didn't care anymore. It seemed right and Tashigi made him believe it was right judging by her almost inaudible moan and the slight tug on the thin hair at the nape of his neck.
Zoro no longer had any coherent thoughts at all, and his body was completely on fire because the moan made him draw her closer (he didn't know how it was still possible), made one hand get lost in her hair and the other in her waist.
But especially made him want to move, made him conjure images in his mind of Tashigi hugging him with nothing more than a sheet covering the two of them. Tashigi underneath him, panting, moving along with him. Tashigi speaking his name over and over again-
However, all creatures need to breathe and he wouldn’t be an exception. He didn’t know how long the kiss lasted, but it seemed a pleasant eternity. And when he opened his eyes, the sight of a Tashigi with a messy hair, with swollen lips, blushing fiercely and panting like him provoked a somewhat uncontrollable pleasure for being the responsible for the state the Marine was in.
Of course, he wouldn’t voice that with the intent of making fun of her because he knew he was in the same state. It would be the pot calling the kettle black.
They kept staring at each other for several seconds, immersed in that little feeling of bliss where nothing mattered - not even Usopp, Chopper and Brook spying on them through the opening in the railing. Zoro knew he would have to endure Sanji’s jokes, Nami’s mocking smile, Franky’s “manly” tears… Luffy would be probably the only one that wouldn’t bug him about it.
I mean, that’s what he hoped anyway because since the boy decided that Nami was the person he wanted to be with, the rubber man definitely didn't think twice about making up for the lost time. Zoro has lost count of how many times he has caught them making out in several places in the Thousand Sunny. At first, Zoro wanted to punch the couple for being publicly indecent, but after this kiss, he could definitely understand.
Tashigi was the first to break the eye contact and once again, that downcast expression was present. What the hell was that now? What the hell did he do wrong? Didn’t she like it? Maybe she already had someone else she liked and couldn’t imagine kissing him?
“I really thought you couldn’t stand me. I mean, at best you put up with me because of the resemblance to your friend.”
“Is that why you are sad?”
Tashigi quickly turned her attention to him and Zoro decided, once and for all, that he liked when her focus was on completely on him. The same way when they train, where she would absorb all of his teachings without blinking. Even when they argued, the marine would always listen attentively before getting angry about something she didn’t agree with. 
“Did you like your friend? I mean, like a girl?”
“Haa? Why are you asking me that?”
“Is that why you kissed me, Zoro?”
Then his eyes widened and he finally got it. He finally understood why she would glance away every time he would seem a little bit indifferent or when she would talk about something and he’d simply nod, not saying a word. Or why she would get so annoyed at the thought of him thinking of her as weak, even after joining the crew. Or even when he ran at full speed to save her from imminent death when she was captured.
Tashigi thought that she would always be a copy of Kuina to him.
And that at the same time, she wasn’t Kuina enough for him to consider her a friend at least. Let alone fall in love with her.
The thing was that Tashigi honestly didn’t know that Zoro wasn’t being indifferent or didn’t want to talk to her, he just didn’t know how to have a conversation with her without being a complete buffoon. She didn’t know he didn’t think of her as a weakling, but as an formidable opponent.
She didn't know he ran like a maniac to save her not because he "couldn't lose her again" - which particularly stung a little the moment the words left her mouth because he got the hidden message that he couldn't see someone that looks so much like Kuina die again and in front of him - but because he had never been so terrified at the thought of Tashigi no longer being in the world to torment him.
She didn’t know he no longer found her a copycat and that slowly they became companions despite their differences.
She didn’t know that only now he realized he was in love with her indeed.
“It’s okay. I get it. It was a mistake, right? It’s fine.”
Tashigi gave a small strained smile that if she had crossed him with a spear it wouldn't hurt so much. She stood up and got ready to leave, but the swordsman was quicker and gripped her arm.
Because he realized she didn’t know any of that because he never told her.
“It wasn’t a mistake. I don’t see you as Kuina anymore because, in the end, you both are very different. And I… I don’t want you to leave.”
“L-leave? I-I never said I was leaving.”
“I know. But that day is likely to come and I don’t want you to go away with some stupid and noble marine.”
“S-s-some stupid and noble m-marine??”
“Yeah. I want you to… stay here. With us… with me.”
Zoro knew this moment was crucial. He gambled everything he had with no guarantees. And he definitely isn’t a careless man or the kind of person to not think before doing something, but he doesn’t know what is wrong with this woman that makes him take risky decisions. The one who planted the idea of a not so lonely future, the idea of having someone to come back to, someone to be by his side when he finally achieve his dream.
Someone to share. Above all else, someone that understands him. 
And understanding was what she did. Tashigi got the meaning behind Zoro’s few words. Of the promise he was making for the future and his sincere desire for her. I mean, she could only have understood because the smile that was on her face again screamed happiness to him.
“Unfortunately, no marine can compete with you, Zoro. Especially if we are talking about a bad sense of direction.”
“Tch!”
Tashigi laughed at his scowl but stopped when Zoro pulled her straight to his lap. He had never seen her so red in his whole life. The girl was redder than Luffy’s cardigan! That made the swordsman smirk and whisper hoarsely in her ear:
“I don’t think you’ll keep laughing when I really show you why no man will ever compete with me, captain Glasses.
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let-it-raines · 5 years
Text
Not Your (soul)Mate {9/15}
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Killian Jones doesn’t like the idea of soulmates. He sees how happy his friends are with theirs, but he still doesn’t like the idea, not when he’s found love and lost it time and time again only to still not know his sign. He has no markings on his skin, no voices in his head, but then one day he meets Emma Swan and everything changes. Because, well, he may not have ink on his skin to tell him who to love, but the very first time that he hears Emma’s voice he knows that she’s the one for him. Then again, that could simply be his desire talking. After all, for every word she speaks, he becomes aroused.
It’s not the worst thing in the world to be incredibly attracted to a beautiful woman, but things aren’t that simple when she doesn’t have any interest in being his soulmate.
He’s screwed. And not in the good way.
Rating: Mature
A/n: Hello, all! We are back to our original artwork for the story (which I still absolutely love), but there will be two more fantastic pic sets by the wonderful @captainsjedi before the story is over! It’s the coolest thing getting to see this story through her eyes! 💙
So there was a kiss last chapter? How do you think this chapter will go? Thanks for reading! You guys are the best! 😊
Found on AO3: Beginning | Current
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Tag list: @initiala @snowbellewells @karenfrommisthaven @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @a-faekindagirl @emmas-storybook @searchingwardrobes @spartanguard @ultimiflos @jamif @idristardis @dreameronarooftop15 @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @wellhellotragic @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog @superchocovian @ultraluckycatnd @cs-forlife @andiirivera @qualitycoffeethings @jonirobinson64 @mariakov81 @xellewoods @thejollyroger-writer @galaxyzxstark @cssns
-/-
“What are you doing?”
“Working.”
“On what?”
“The same thing that I do every day. My bloody job.”
“Woah, woah, woah,” Ariel breathes out on a frustrated sigh, holding her hands up as she plops herself down on the corner of his desk, her stomach coming into view before anything else. He looks at her stomach far too much, but it always seems to be what she puts in his eye line. “Who peed in your Cheerios this morning?”
“That’s a disgusting phrase,” he groans, placing his pen in its spot in the holder before leaning back in his chair, closing his eyes and rubbing his hands over his face to work out some of the heaviness that he feels there, that he feels all over. A spark flies between his fingertips and his beard, and he nearly yells out in frustration. But that would be too much, too dramatic, and he doesn’t want to give Ariel the satisfaction. “Who even came up with that?”
“Whatever cereal company it is that competes with Cheerios. They’re trying to taint the name.”
“Sounds like a brilliant plan.”
“Mhm,” she hums, reaching forward and tapping his shoulder until he opens his eyes and his hands fall down to his thighs. “Seriously, though. You okay? You’ve been even more grumpy than usual.”
Flashing her a smile, one that he knows is insincere and that she will too, he tries to be “less grumpy.” He personally doesn’t think that he’s grumpy. He thinks that the sun is basically shining out of his ass right now.
“How would you like me to be more pleasant, A? What can I do for you?”
Her right brow raises at the same time that her shoulder does, a pretty uncaring half shrug. “Maybe lose the creepy fake smile. It makes you look smug.” He nods his head and lets his lips fall, raising a leg to cross it over his knee under his desk. “And I want you to take me out to lunch today.”
“There it is,” he laughs, this one genuine as his eyes shift to the clock on his wall and the hand indicating that it’s a little before one. “Shall we go to your husband’s restaurant down the street or do you have somewhere else in mind? I’ll let the lady pick.”
“And they say chivalry is dead.” She slowly stands from the desk, smoothing out her kelly green pants and her blouse. “I want to go to that deli with the good sandwiches. You know the one that makes that - ”
“I know the one.”
He stands from his chair, adjusting his own suit pants, and lets Ariel hook her arm into his as he guides her out of the office, shouting down the hallway to tell Liam that he’ll be back in an hour, maybe an hour and a half only for Ariel to shout that they’ll be gone for at least two hours. That is definitely not happening when he got an unexpected redesign job this morning, but he can already see Ariel trying to weasel her way into it as they walk two blocks over to Delano’s Kitchen. It’s usually pretty quiet there, not too much foot traffic moving through the small deli, so he and Ariel buy their meals and settle down outside under the yellow and white striped umbrellas. Storybrooke can be such an idyllic little town sometimes with its bright colors and preppy storefronts, and it’s usually a pleasant place to be, especially outside in the summers when the temperature is just right.
Today is one of those days, but he’s having a bit of trouble focusing on the gentle breeze that is blowing through his hair or the sunshine that’s being blocked by the shades of his sunglasses. If he’s honest, he’s mostly having issues focusing on what Ariel is saying, which is something he’s most definitely not proud of. She wanted to go to lunch with him today, wanted for them to spend some time together, and he’ll be damned if he doesn’t listen to her and engage in conversation with her.
But with every sip of water that passes through his lips he can feel Emma’s mouth on his, warm and pliant lips harshly devouring his and making the flesh on his arms and the back of his neck break out into hives. He’s wondered how she would kiss for months now, has thought about it whenever he thinks about her, but absolutely nothing could have prepared him for the actuality of it all. It was...bloody magnificent. He’s kissed many a woman in his time, had many very solid make out sessions in his thirty-five years, but this was decidedly different.
And a hell of a lot better.
God, she’s just...she’s amazing. She made him feel alive, like the fireworks that were exploding around them two weeks ago were exploding across his skin and down his spine to his groin instead of in the air in the Nolan’s backyard. But then she’d stepped away, said it was a one-time thing, and climbed out of the treehouse.
He kissed his soulmate for the first time in a six-year-old’s treehouse with fireworks exploding around them.
What the hell is his life?
He’d kissed Emma, or Emma kissed him really, and with the feel of her lips still on his and her scent mixing in with his clothes, he watched her run across the yard and into the house away from where everyone was standing on the balcony watching David light the fireworks with help from Robin. Emma told him to wait five minutes before following her, but he couldn’t move, couldn’t go anywhere. He couldn’t breathe.
For every inkling of affection and feelings that he’s developed for Emma since they met, that was the first time that he was sure of it all. He was sure that they could be something, that they could have something real and true. It was the first time that he thought that he could most definitely move on from Milah, from his last love. He’s mourned her and loved her for years, and he never thought he could love someone again. He doesn’t love Emma, but the beginnings are there.
He could love her.
He wants to. That’s thinking much too far ahead, but he tends to do that.
They match up well. The universe tells them so, but he doesn’t care about any of that stuff. Emma says she doesn’t care, but she very obviously cares too much. She cares enough to defy whoever it is that makes the world this way, but there’s no way that she can deny the very real something between them.
And not the fact that they both want to fuck each other the more they talk to each other.
But it’s Emma. He doesn’t know how she’s been hurt, but he knows that she has. Something, more likely someone, has scarred her pretty badly, and that’s why she ran away from him after kissing him. She made the first move and obviously got spooked during it. He has this small, inane hope that she was spooked because she’s scared of the possibilities, of the future, but he doesn’t know.
He can’t know.
It’s not like he’s spoken to her since.
Or texted her. Or written her a note.
They’ve had absolutely zero communication despite him seeing her around town at least ten times in the past fourteen days.
Despite him seeing her across the street at Mr. French’s bakery right now.
This town needs to be much larger. And preferably soon.
She’s dressed in jeans and a simple white button down with sleeves rolled to her elbows, her hair pulled up in a ponytail, and her badge clipped on her belt loops like it always is. David is with her, the two of them standing together in front of the counter, and he has to keep from staring at her for too long before she notices. Or even worse, before Ariel notices.
The absolute last thing he wants is for Ariel to know that he is undeniably pining over Emma Swan. The woman is all about love and pushing him into love, and he doesn’t need the extra push and encouragement from somewhere else right now.
Damn, he wishes he could talk to Emma right now about their kiss and their....friendship.
It’s a friendship, right? It has to be.
“Can I have some of your cantaloupe?” Ariel asks even as her fork spears one and she’s taking it off of his plate.
“Why do you even ask?” he chuckles, turning his attention away from Emma and from David to look at Ariel. “I mean, you know I’m not going to say no, and it’s not as if you waited for my answer anyways.”
She pops the fruit into her mouth as her shoulders shrug. “It’s the polite thing to do. Eric is always complaining about how I steal food from him, but he does the same thing to me.”
“Liam does that. He just leans over and takes food away. It’s usually the food I’m saving for last too.”
“That’s the actual worst. You don’t mess with someone’s food.” He raises a brow at that, not even needing to really respond with words. Ariel smiles and shrugs again. “I’m pregnant.”
“Is that going to be your excuse until you have the baby?”
“Yep. And afterward, it’s going to be that I just had a baby. And then later it’s going to be that I have a baby at home who exhausts me. So you pretty much have to give me all of your food forever now.”
He hums, grabbing a grape. “This will be the last time I take you out to eat then.”
“No part of that is true. I - oh look, there’s Emma and David. Emma,” Ariel shouts. He sinks down in his chair, wishing that he could disappear right now. Why did he not think of this earlier? Of course Ariel is going to call them over.
David quickly jogs across the street, but he watches as Emma debates it, looking around them and digging into her bag to pull out a cookie before she slowly walks toward them, pretty much stuffing the cookie in her mouth all at once.
“Hey,” David says when he gets to their table, leaning against the adjacent table while Emma does the same, her eyes glancing anyone but to his before she puts on a pair of sunglasses, “how are the two of you?”
“Great. Killian’s buying me lunch.”
“Not that Ariel’s given me much of a choice.”
“It’s the least I can do for all of the hard work that I do for you.”
“Do you mean your job?”
“Hush.” Ariel reaches over to grab some more of his fruit, and he takes a moment to see if Emma is still turned away from him. Her presence is making his body heat and his heart ache. He wants to talk to her. Or text her or leave a bloody message on a napkin again to ask why the hell she kissed him and then ran away. “Emma, do you want to come by on Saturday to catch up on Billion Dollar Wreck? Eric is itching to watch, and I told him we had to wait for you.”
“I bloody love that show,” he blurts out, unable to stop himself. Three heads turn toward him, and he makes an effort to keep his lips straight as he looks at Ariel.
“Oh that’s right,” Ariel sighs, motioning between the two of them, “you’re a History Channel buff too. Emma and I love it. Killian, you should come over on Saturday.”
“No,” Emma says. “I mean, I don’t think I can come over on Saturday.”
“What other plans do you have?”
“She doesn’t have any,” David fills in only for Emma to punch his bicep. It should sting because she’s trying to stay away from him, but he honestly finds it amusing. “She was just talking about how she was going to spend all of Saturday on her couch in her pajamas.”
“Those are plans.”
“Oh come on,” Ariel pleads, “it’ll be so much fun. You can wear your pajamas. I’ll get snacks, and it’ll be just like at home except you get to spend time with me.”
Emma groans, the sound probably only audible to him, and he realizes that her words haven’t really affected him today. She hasn’t spoken much, but there’s only been the slightest stirring. That’s...odd. It’s odd, but he’s not going to complain about it.
“Fine but next weekend you’re going to let me spend the weekend holed up alone in the apartment where no one can bother me.”
“You have a roommate.”
“She spends her weekends at Will’s most of the time.”
“Perfect.” Ariel claps her hands. “You guys can come over around noon. I’ll get Eric to make lunch.”
“I think that sounds like a great idea, don’t you, Emma?”
She finally looks at him, and even though he can’t see her eyes, he knows that they’re shooting daggers at him. The scowl that’s painted on her lips helps him realize that. Maybe Ariel calling them over here isn’t the worst thing in the world even if Saturday is most likely going to be a disaster.
“It sounds like it’s going to be the best day of my life,” she says, her tone dripping with sarcasm before she angles her body away from him. “A, I’ll call you later, okay? David and I have to get back to work. Make sure Killian buys you some kind of dessert too. I think you deserve it for having to work with him all day.”
A chill runs down his spine, slowly spreading over his body, but mostly he smiles. At least she doesn’t seem to totally hate him. But it wouldn’t be a complete surprise to him if she didn’t show up on Saturday. It would actually be what he expects.
“I do enjoy sweet things, darling,” he tells Emma, punctuating his words with a flick of his tongue across his bottom lip that has her cheeks flushing red.
Emma nods her head and walks away, her ass looking absolutely fantastic in her jeans, while David says more polite goodbyes. He probably could have been nicer, teased her less, but he seems to not be able to help himself when it comes to Emma. Maybe it’s a side effect of their...predicament. Maybe it’s simply what she brings out in him.
-/-
“Hey, Max,” he laughs when he opens the front door of Ariel and Eric’s house Saturday morning, stepping into their entryway and rubbing his hand behind the thick hair at Max’s ears. “Hey, boy. Oh I’ve missed you. Do you want a cracker? I bet I can sneak a cracker out of your mummy’s pantry.”
“I heard that,” Eric yells, and Killian glances up to see him rounding the corner of the living room. He’s still dressed in his pajamas, and that makes Killian feel a little better about only wearing his gray joggers and a t-shirt from last year’s summer regatta. “Just let yourself in why don’t you.”
“I mean, you did leave the door unlocked.”
“That’s beside the point.”
He rolls his eyes a bit before stepping forward and patting Eric’s back in greeting so that he can bypass him to head into the kitchen to get Max his crackers. It’s the oddest thing, but he’s obsessed with saltines, and if Kilian has to bribe the dog to get him to like him, he has no qualms about that.
“Where’s Ariel?” he questions, opening their pantry and scanning for the food.
“In the shower. She didn’t feel great this morning, so she slept in a bit.”
“Is she okay? Do we need to cancel today?”
“She’s okay. And if we cancel, she’ll absolutely have my head. She’s been talking about you guys coming over for days.” He finds the crackers in the cabinet and opens up a plastic sleeve before grabbing two and turning around to hand them to an eagerly awaiting Max, his pink tongue hanging out of his mouth. “And I keep having to run to the store to get food since she’s constantly changing her mind on that.”
“So what are we eating?”
“Ariel decided on pizza, but not the kind we can get delivered. Homemade individual ones. It’s quite the show for us to be sitting around in our sweats.”
“Pizza is great, babe,” Ariel sighs as she walks into the room in a pair of leggings and sweater with a towel wrapped around her hair. “And my taste buds are changing because of your demon child. The least you can do is spend all of our savings on food.”
“Of course, sweetheart,” Eric smiles, reaching his arm out to Ariel to wrap it around her shoulder and pull her into his side so that he can kiss her temple and whisper something in her ear that makes her giggle. A flash of jealousy runs through him at how happy they are, at how much goodness they have in their life with each other, but he has to push that down. He absolutely cannot let himself think that way. That’s how he’ll make himself miserable. “I’m excited for us to eat pizza and sit on our asses all day.”
“That’s the best way to spend a Saturday.”
“Who’s running the restaurant, Eric?”
“Oh no one. I figured people could go in and simply eat all of the fish raw.”
“So Smee?”
“Smee.” Eric nods.
The three of them talk a little bit more, mostly about this year’s regatta and beach festival over Labor Day weekend, before moving into the living room and settling down after closing the curtains so that the usually light room is covered in darkness. He grabs a blanket from the basket and settles down on their recliner while Ariel and Eric lounge on the couch. He can’t help himself from wondering if Emma is actually going to show up, but he’s not about to ask about it. He could tell that Ariel noticed...something between he and Emma after their little run in at lunch. She’s far too perceptive of him, and he doesn’t want to let her onto anything. He may have no clue what exactly is happening with he and Emma, but he does know that she doesn’t want anyone to know that they’re soulmates. She’d likely be pissed at him if he were to let that secret spill.
So he can’t ask if Emma is still coming today. He has to act normally.
Which definitely doesn’t happen when he hears the click of the front door as it opens and Emma steps inside in what looks like her running gear with her hair tucked in a ponytail under her cap and legs on display in her black shorts and loose white tank top with a neon yellow sports bra underneath.
Bloody hell.
She’s trying to kill him. And somehow he knows that she’s doing it on purpose since she’s the one who wanted to wear pajamas and have un-brushed hair and simply do nothing today. And yet she’s apparently decided to go out for a run and wear...that.
What in the world goes through her mind? He’d love to know. He really would.
God, her legs.
“Sorry I’m late,” she starts, reaching down to pet Max’s ears before she’s in the living room and leaning over the couch to kiss Eric’s cheek and hug Ariel’s neck, giving him a slight wave. “I slept a little too late and then decided I wanted to go for a run since I’m going to be sitting on my ass all day. How many episodes did you guys watch without me?”
“None. We waited on you.”
“Oh perfect. What are we eating? I’m starving.”
“We’re making pizzas.”
“Oh my God,” she groans, falling over the loveseat and propping her legs up over the arm while he wishes for all of the world that she would stop talking. He’s never going to be able to move this blanket off of his lap. Her legs are so damn long. “I love homemade pizzas. If I ever get a house, I’m buying one of those pizza ovens. I just have to, because our apartment fire escape definitely can’t hold a pizza oven.”
“We should get one of those,” Ariel suggests to Eric.
“We have one at the restaurant.”
“But that’s not the same as having it here. You don’t let me cook in the restaurant kitchen.”
“You once lost your hairband in the kitchen, and we had to shut down the kitchen until we found it in the trash.”
“That was an accident.”
“There are health codes, A.”
“Whatever.”
“So are we going to cook the pizza now?” Emma asks, breaking Ariel and Eric out of their conversation. “That way we can eat while we watch. Don’t you think that’s a great idea, Killian?”
He grits his teeth and tries to take a few deep breaths to calm himself down as the base of his spine tingles a bit. She’s talking quite a lot today, and like the outfit, he definitely thinks it’s on purpose. He’d really rather like for the woman to make up her mind on whether she wants to tease him or kiss him and then run away because he has absolutely no idea what to think.
“That’s a grand idea, Swan.”
So they make their pizzas, the four of them moving around the kitchen, and he swears that Emma never stops talking. She and Ariel get into some kind of deep discussion about the Outlander book series, and while he’s read most of them, he keeps his mouth closed over everything as he kneads the dough for his, his hands covered in flour that’s found its way to the hem of his shirt.
He should have thought through the repercussions of wearing gray joggers around Emma.
When Ariel and Eric put their pizzas in the oven, only two fitting at a time, they leave the room to sit back down on the couches, leaving he and Emma to themselves. She’s currently on the tips of her toes trying to reach a spice from the top of the cabinet, and he takes the opportunity to cage her in, getting close enough that his chest brushes into her back but not too close so as to make her uncomfortable as he whispers in her ear.
“You know, darling, I find that women who run away after kissing me don’t tend to spend the next time they see trying to arouse me.”
“Lots of women run after you kiss them then?”
“Just the one.”
He feels her breath hitch and her shoulders tense, and he smirks into her ear, taking the risk of rubbing his beard gently into her as his hand travels up her arm. He can small sweat on her skin but also her shampoo and the faintest whiff of the pizza they’re making, and all he wants his to brush his lips under the shell of her ear so that he can hear the sound that he’s sure that it would elicit. But he doesn’t. He can’t. So he reaches his hand up a little further to grab the garlic seasoning she’s reaching for and places it on the counter.
“But I have a feeling that she’d like to do it again,” he tacks on before backing away from her.
“You wish.”
“I do.”
As fun as it is teasing her, he cannot stand that close to her again without doing something, so he quickly leaves the room, moving to the guest bathroom to splash his face with water and take a breather. He can finish making his pizza later, but he needs to calm down. And he refuses to wank another one out in this household, so he’s not going to. But seriously, what was he thinking when it came to his choice of pants?
“You okay?” Ariel asks when he exits the bathroom.
“Just dandy.”
From then on, he decides to stop taking the high road. If Emma’s going to torture him, he can do the same to her. He shouldn’t be the one taking the high road anyways. They’re regressing to how they were when they went out on the boat, and while it’s not what he wants, it’s where they are.
He is too old to be playing games, but life keeps throwing him new decks of cards.
Everyone is silent as the show starts, only the sound of the television and Max scratching his stomach filling the room, but he prefers it enough so that he can have a chance to calm himself down more while they eat. The pizza is delicious, and he idly wonders if he could get an oven on the deck of his apartment. Possibly. He’d have to check with his super. All is well throughout the first episode, but then during the second Emma and Eric start talking about the security system he’s having installed down at the restaurant. It’s a quiet murmuring, not really detracting from the show, but with the consistency of it, he can feel his erection beginning to grow at the sound of her voice in a way that it hasn’t since the first time that they met.
If his body could make up its mind on how it reacts to Emma, that would be great.
Fantastic. Now he sounds like that meme online.
And he sounds ancient saying it like that.
Killian: You have got to stop talking right now.
Emma: Why? Is your sail being raised?
He appreciates the pun, but he’s really not in the mood for it right now.
Killian: Yes.
Emma: Their bedroom is just down the hall. You’re familiar with it.
He glances over toward Emma, but she’s not even looking in his direction, her eyes still glued to the television screen.
Killian: Would you like to join me?
Emma: Like I said, you wish.
Killian: You literally have no idea.
Emma: Gross.
Killian: Oh come on, Swan. I know you find me charming.
Emma: Again. You wish. I’m just going to keep repeating that.
Emma: Why are they spending ten minutes writing a fake letter on this show? I know people wrote letters back in the day because they didn’t have anything else, but I feel like this is over the top.
Killian: It’s rather romantic to think about people writing letters to their loved ones who they may never see again.
Emma: Yeah, but they had to know that no one was going to see the letters.
Killian: But they said the words, love. They made sure there was nothing left unsaid. It’s closure, I think. And there’s also a beauty in putting your words to the page.
Emma: No one writes letters anymore, but you definitely could with the way you talk like an eighteenth century poet.
Killian: Maybe I’ll have to think on that.
Killian: They wrote letters in Harry Potter despite having actual magic.
Emma: You like Harry Potter?
Killian: I was a lanky British boy with dark hair and light eyes who wore glasses. He was basically my hero.
Emma: That’s adorable.
Emma: Do you still have those glasses?
Killian: The magic of contacts is better than the magic of the Elder wand.
Emma: That’s the nerdiest thing you’ve ever said.
Killian: But you understood the reference, didn’t you?
Emma: …
Emma: Yes. Harry Potter was pretty much my hero too. There’s not a lot of stories about orphans that end well.
He realizes what she’s just said, what she’s just revealed about herself even if he already knew that, but he knows not to push. This conversation is a rare pleasant one with her, and he’s not going to mess it up now. They get along when they text, sometimes even when they speak, and maybe this is simply going to be a rollercoaster of a relationship from now on.
Not that it’s a relationship romantically speaking. It’s simply a relationship as in they have one and can’t seem to get away from each other. Not a friendship, but maybe something close.
It doesn’t even matter.
Killian: Do you secretly have a wand and a robe in your bedroom?
Emma: Not that kind of wand.
He has to bite his tongue to keep from laughing, but it doesn’t work, his chuckles still ending up much louder than he anticipated. Ariel and Eric don’t notice, especially since they seem to still be much more wrapped up in the show than he is, and honestly, he’s fine with that. He’s terrified that if anything changes, if there’s the smallest shift, whatever little spell he and Emma are under right now will break and the pleasantries will stop.
No part of him wants them to stop.
And he’s going a bit crazy because he’s starting to think of other ideas for how he can keep getting to know Emma. Or at least, for her to get to know him.
Killian: Look who’s making jokes about the boudoir now.
Emma: Did you say that just to use the word “boudoir”?
Killian: You bet I did.
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