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xxsycamore · 7 months

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"I can't have sex with you Arthur, I don't have enough diamonds!!"

Arthur Conan Doyle x f!Reader • rating: M (MDNI) • tags: Breaking the Fourth Wall; Crack; Implied Sexual Content; Suggestive Themes • wordcount: 580 • masterlist

a/n: I've had this crack fic idea since FOREVER, but I think it's relatable at any given time... Tagging @ikemendood for crack content 👉🏻👈🏻

It has been one of these days, when it feels like you and Arthur have been locked in the universe of some kind of action movie. Bizzare and dramatic things have been happening all day long, some that led to miscommunications between you but quickly got resolved with the power of love...

Naturally, eager as you both are to once again prove your love for each other, things begin to get heated at the end of the day.

And then you gasp panically in realization.

"I don't have enough dia for the epilogue!!"

You find yourself pushed down on the bed, but in the last second you manage to block Arthur with your hands so he can't get on top of you yet.

"Hmm?~What did you say, Luv? You know, I've been waiting to have you sprawled under me allll day..."

His words sent a shiver down your spine, and you let out an agonizing whine at having to disobey your own need. You turn to your side and reach for your cellphone that has been charging on the nightstand.

Arthur blinks, still perplexed that you're using this thing at all. While you could charge it just fine, he wondered what you're using it for in this day and age.

Not to mention at a time like that. While he's right there, ready to devour you.

"Dear?"

You appear to be tapping hurriedly on the thing, blue light illuminating your face as some strange music is produced from the bizarre piece of technology. Without looking at your lover, you struggle to mutter an answer.

"It's- You wouldn't understand."

Arthur remains frozen in his place, observing as the screen flashes, your fingers dancing on it. He sees... test tubes aligned on the screen. They're ...filled with different colored liquid?

You rush to sort them by color as if you're being held at gunpoint. Arthur has never been so confused in his life.

"Luv, you're right, I don't understand. But you could just say if you don't feel in the mood for-"

"NO! I MUST GET THE EPILOGUE AND HAVE SEX WITH YOU TONIGHT!"

"...?"

The sultry conclusion, the epilogue of your day spent together, he figures. His writer's vocabulary might be rubbing off on you. That's kind of endearing, but...

Arthur sits down on his haunches perplexed. Is this some strange form of bedroom roleplay you're introducing him to?

"I must have you, Arthur, I even saw the preview and it was so hot-"

"The preview? You're saying you had a naughty dream about us making love and you want to see it come true? Dirty girl..."

Arthur's distracting words make you mess up in your game, and you have to restart the level. Just a few more and the game will give you a reward in diamonds, then all you need to do would be to watch those annoying daily ads and then it should be enough...

Seeing that his dirty talk has no effect on you, Arthur sighs and moves away from his position. Instead, he lies down next to you, becoming your big spoon as he looks over your shoulder at the game you're so consumed in, seeing that you're not going to pay him any attention before you're done with it.

"It's some kind of puzzle game, isn't it? Maybe you should leave it to me, Luv... in the meantime, why don't you tell me more about that 'preview' you saw of our intimate time together, hmm?"

Taglist: @arsnovacadenza @ale-teodora @kimi00twin @otomelady @privilegedpancake @g-kleran @pumpumnnnp @thesirenwashere @ravenarld @kimmy-banana @devonares @galaxyprison @sadshaxk @starshards26 @thewitchofbooks @acethephoenix256 @ikevamp-shrine-2 @nad-zeta @crystal13unny @keen19thcenturygoatsstudent @lordsister @ikemen-banshou @themysticalbeing @otome-scribbles @rhodolitesrose @coornn @kpop-and-otome @queen-dahlia @kisara-16 @chaosangel767 @ikemenlibrary @queengiuliettafirstlady @aurora-morning @aquagirl1978 @ikemenlover24 @mcofthemansion @joy-the-reader @katriniac @ikemen-writer @tele86 @lovely-bubb1es @aria-chikage @babyblue0t7 @rhodoliteschaos @shrimpy-kitsune @princess-pray-a Let me know if you want to be tagged/untagged!

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp arthur #ikemen vampire arthur #ikevamp crack #ikemen vampire fanfic #ikevamp fanfic #ikemen fanfic #ikemen crack #ikemen #ikemen series #otome #otome fanfic

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starrykirsche · 9 months

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oh my gosh your writing is so insanely good i dont understand how its gives me sm butterflies bro

could you mayhaps do a tom x fem!reader one again and they’re in like rival bands

maybe not necessarily rival bands but there’s like a lot of tensions between the members of each band and they’re kinda known for disliking each other but then like they get drunk one night and tom and r are alone and boom yk idk how to describe it im so sorry

thank youuu 💗💗

-💿

ugh ty 💿 anon, you’re basically keeping my motivation afloat rn. you’re requests are always so fun to dooo

sorry this fic has been like weeks in the making, i've been really busy :(

Make Friends, Make Lovers

Tom Kaulitz band v. band fic

You are the guitarist of the famous German girl group "Engelsoase". With three other girls by your side, you've enchanted the nations with your music. The only catch is, you're not the only stars to come out of the humble roots of small town Germany. A band of combating popularity stands eye to eye with the four of you. They call themselves "Tokio Hotel".

Truthfully, none of you have ever met face to face. All of the tension between the two bands is mostly for publicity. The fans eat up every jab that's thrown between the two bands. Though, watching cute boys, that in any other situation would be your peers, poking fun at you and your best friends has made you distain the rivaling band in a way that's much more real. You'll often find yourself ranting to your bassist, Nadine, about how everything your band does nowadays has to be somehow related to this "Tokio Hotel".

"Listen, if you have such a problem with it, why don't you just ask Kim to do something about it?" Nadine says as she sets down her magazine.

You roll your eyes, "What would Kimmy do about it? Other than lecture me."

"Honestly," Nadine stretches her arms above her head, "I don't really care."

You groan and heave yourself off of the couch, "Fine," Snatching the magazine away from Nadine, "But I'm taking this with me."

Cautiously, you walk into Kim's room, where she's watching the television with your drummer Ines. You stand at the doorway for a minute before you sigh. "Kimmy? Can I talk to you for a sec'?" You ask. Almost in unison, Kim and Ines turn their heads to look at you.

"Sure thing," Kim turns to look at Ines, who's already begrudgingly getting off the bed. The small girl pats your shoulder as she leaves. "What's up?" Kim asks as she pauses the TV and turns to look at you. You shuffle into the room and sigh.

"Listen," You sigh as you fidget with the magazine you took from Nadine moments earlier, "This Tokio Hotel rivalry thing is getting so old. I don't know how much longer I can just be okay with being a boy band's duff." Looking at her, expecting her to be annoyed by your confession, only to find she's.. not. At all. Actually, she has a small smirk creeping up her face. You speak up, having noticed her mischievous demeanor, "What? Why are you smiling?"

"Oh, no reason." She says, turning back to the TV, "I don't think you'll have to worry about that 'Tokio Hotel rivalry thing' much more." And with that, you leave her room in confusion.

For the next week, it was radio silent about Tokio Hotel or anything of the sort.

But, that Saturday, getting lunch with the rest of your band, Kim dropped the bomb.

Swallowing down another bite of wurst, she clears her throat and speaks up, "So, girls, I'm going to be taking us to Berlin this afternoon." The questions spring out at an instant. 'Why?', 'Where are we going?', 'Do we need anything?'. But you stay silent, because Kim is smiling at you in specific.

She shushes Nadine and Ines and smiles devilishly, "This has been in the books for weeks, and everything is well coordinated." Kim beats around the bush, but you have a hunch. A hunch that you hope so dearly isn't true...

The car ride to Berlin is a quiet one. You sit in the back seat, with your arms crossed. Nadine sits beside you with her headphones on, Ines in the passenger seat and drumming on her thighs with her hands, while Kim drives. You know where you're going, and you know you can't do anything about it. You don't know why you're so upset about it, but you are. It's not really the boys' faults, you suppose. Maybe it's the media's fault, or the interviewer's. But it's so much easier to dislike four boys instead of disliking thousands of faceless reporters.

The car pool comes to an end at a high rise building that towers above the vehicle. Sun already beginning to set, the four of you walk in…

The four of you are greeted by tall boys with the same expressions as you. Kim shakes the tallest one’s hand and it’s easy to tell this was set up by the both of them.

“Well, make yourselves at home,” The tall boy says, his eyes dark as he looks at Kim, “We’re so glad we can finally meet you all.”

He turns to the rest of his bandmates and nods, they nod back. Your eyes meet the guitarist of the rivaling band’s, you watch as he looks you up and down and bites his decorated lip. “Gross,” You mumble to yourself. But it seems Tom heard you, his gaze softening.

It seems as if all the band members divvy themselves out to their “counterparts” at first. Not you. You take the glass of champagne that the tallest boy— the one with the makeup on— Bill, was it?— and you make a break for the balcony that overlooks the city.

You let out a relieved sigh as you not so subtly slam the sliding glass door behind you. Taking a sip of the champagne in your glass— huh, at least they have good taste.

There’s a light breeze out here, and the city lights, you find, are quite beautiful. It’s tranquil, and you almost forget that you were forced to be here. It’s not so bad, you conclude, they seemed hospitable enough. Maybe that Tom boy was a bit too hospitable for your liking, but it could be worse.

After a few minutes, you hear the glass door to your back slowly push open. Rolling your eyes to yourself, you turn back to look who it is. Strangely enough, it’s Tom.

“Mind if I join you?” He asks softly. This.. weirds you put a little. Tom was the bad boy, the player, but he seems quite gentle now.

“Uhh.. sure?” You respond as your turn back to lean against the railing of the balcony. He shuffles over beside you. Already, you can feel his eyes on you. “What brings you out here?” You ask, turning to look at him slowly.

His eyes are wide and full, he clears his throat softly and looks up at the sky. “It.. got boring in there.” He says.

“What’s with the change of personality?” You ask, “What happened to player-Tom? The bad-boy?”

He looks almost embarrassed at the question, “Well, I tried it but.. you weren’t even wooed, even a little bit.” He chuckles, as if in disbelief.

“So now you’re just gonna act like a kicked puppy?” You giggle, he looks at you fondly, still a bit embarrassed.

“Yes, actually. That’s the plan,” Tom says lightheartedly, turning his body towards you a bit more. As if he’s growing more comfortable with you.

2 cups of champagne each. 2 hours later. Giggling and evading each of your bandmates. You find, you really enjoy this boy’s company. It’s late, but you’re not tired really. Not at all. You both sit criss-cross, side by side, thigh to thigh, with your backs to the railing as you watch all your bandmates play a board game together.

“Y’know… I really like you,” Tom says softly, turning his head to you.

“Really?”

“Yeah, I mean, you’re so different,” He adds, “You don’t care about all that superficial stuff, you’re fun to hang out with.”

After a quiet moment you nod, “I could say the same about you.. unfortunately.”

The both of you chuckle softly. He places his hand on your thigh.

“I thought I’d hate this— or just like hook up with Kim or something,” He says, and you make a mock throwing up noise, at which he laughs, “But I was wrong!”

The two of you just sort of.. look at each other for a moment.

To your complete and utter surprise, you go in for it first. It’s sloppy, and half hazard, the two of you’s lips meeting like neither of you have ever kissed before. But you both quickly get the handle of it, dear god he’s a good kisser. He pulls away and looks at you with wide eyes.

“Cool,” He mumbles to himself and disbelief.

“Yeah…” You whisper back, leaning in again.

#tom kaulitz #tokio hotel #tokio hotel imagine #tokio hotel fanfic #tokio hotel fluff #fluff #bill kaulitz #georg listing #gustav schäfer #fanfic #tom kaulitz fanfic #tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz fluff #tom kaulitz x you #tokio hotel tom kaulitz #tokio hotel x reader

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saintedbyher · 4 months

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Jealous!Angela x reader

Ever since your relationship with Angela developed into a full blown dating relationship from just an office-mance, every day was an exciting day. You worked with your girlfriend, how great is that? It’s been four months and “girlfriend” still sounds surreal in your head.

However, today her friend Mariah is scheduled to visit for a TNTL shoot. You knew of Mariah Rose Faith before Angela through being a Mean Girls Musical fan, but never in a million years did you expect to meet her. Let alone work with her. Because your girlfriend and her were best friends.

“I’m so nervous,” you whisper to Angela on set. Angela just received a “be there in 5” text from Mariah.

“Don’t be, she will love you,” your girlfriend says.

“I’m meeting, like, a real celebrity!” you exclaim.

“Pfft, she’s not, you’ll see,” Angela jokes.

“Look who I found!” Courtney enters the room with Mariah. Angela squeals and runs up to the brunette and hugs her. The two girls scream in excitement.

“My cats aren’t even this excited to see me,” Courtney laughs to you.

“Mariah, this is my girlfriend, Y/n!” Angela drags her over to you and Courtney.

“Hi, oh my gosh it’s so nice to meet you! You are my favorite Regina, by the way,” you shake her hand. She says “nice to finally meet you!” and continues but you get distracted by her gorgeousness. You knew she was beautiful, that’s obvious, but in person is so much different. She’s taller than you by a good couple inches, though she’s wearing platform boots. Adorable platform boots paired with cropped jeans and a black crop top. She might as well be her character Stephanie Lauter.

You snap out of it and the two of you talk on your own while Angela talks with Courtney.

The rest of the cast for the shoot arrive and Kimmy calls to start rolling.

Every time Angela goes out you are cracking up on the other side of the partition. She always makes you laugh no matter what and you love it.

You and Mariah both lose it every time. One of those times Mariah leaned her forehead into your shoulder, crying laughing at Angela’s bit, and Angela saw when she came back. You made eye contact and she didn’t say a word to you. Though you’re in the middle of filming, what do you expect?

It’s Angela’s turn in the seat and you make your away over to the stool to make her laugh. But you forgot your prop.

“Oh no,” you say in-character as an old man. “I seem to forgot my cellular phone,” you turn to peer behind the partition to see if anyone will assist you.

“Oh honey!” Mariah runs out in a matching gray wig, being a good sport. “You forgot your gadget!” she yells in a falsetto voice and hands you the toy phone. You decide to go along with the bit.

“Oh honey,” you reply in a deep voice with your hands on her shoulders. Mariah grabs your biceps. “You always know what gizmo I need.”

Angela spits but not because she laughed. She spits the water and says, “‘gizmo’ got me, that’s so stupid.” She says it in a joking way but something rubs you the wrong way.

After each cast members’ turn, you all remain on set to speak with Mariah. It’s always exciting when an outsider is at the office. Everyone (though mostly you, you can’t lie) ask a million questions about what she’s doing next, what shows she may have coming up, everything.

You two sit side by side on a couch, Mariah in the middle, and Keith on the other side of her. Everyone else is in various single chairs.

You get to discussing Mean Girls and when you get into a heated debate on whether or not Cady or Regina was more whipped for the other, you can’t help your excitement.

“Regina would have bought Cady an island if she had just asked!” you turn more towards Mariah and place your hands on her knee.

“No! Regina is way too cool so be so pussy-whipped!” Mariah almost yells back.

Keith, Courtney, and Ian attempt to join the conversation but it’s really only you and Mariah. You’ve noticed Angela not saying a word in the past maybe twenty minutes, but every time you take a glance at her she is looking right at you.

Once you all sat down after the shoot, you realized what was going on. Angela was jealous. Because you know you would never do anything to make Angela need to worry, you decided to play with her a little bit. You think Angela knows she has nothing to worry about either, but you’ve learned she’s the jealous type regardless. It’s kind of hot.

Another twenty minutes pass of you and Mariah finding an even better bantering-rhythm. Mariah was not leaning into the flirting whatsoever which made your flirtation even more innocent.

“I’m so jealous of your hair,” you reach out to touch the ends of her incredibly long hair. “I used to have hair this long and I miss it.”

She gave you a few tips on what she does to keep it healthy but you sort of blacked out when Angela stands up and says “I need to borrow Y/n for a second.” She gives no explanation, only grabs your hand and pulls you away.

“What?” you asks a little too ‘I know what I did wrong but I won’t admit it’-ly.

She pushes open an empty single-use bathroom off the main hallway of the building. You’re pulled into it and she locks the door.

“What the hell are you doing?” she asks. You’ve never seen her so serious.

“Hanging out with your friend,” you say casually.

She harshly grabs your wrist. “Don’t,” she says. “You’re flirting with her in front of everyone.”

“We’re being friends, I thought you would be happy,” you say even though you know it’s untrue. You are being friends with her and hopefully Angela would be happy about that, but you’re doing more on purpose as well. You both know it. It’s only Mariah who seems oblivious to the flirting from you.

“No, I’m not fucking happy with you making me look like an idiot in front of my coworkers,” she obviously wants to yell but doesn’t. She only squeezes your wrist so hard it hurts.

“Our coworkers,” you correct her. Everything is hers when she’s angry.

“You’re lucky I’m not doing this in front of them,” she says.

“Totally, lucky me,” you jerk your wrist out of her grasp and turn to exit the bathroom.

She suddenly pulls you back, grabs your face, and kisses you, hard. You back hits the door. You wrap your arms around her waist and kiss back. She smells so good and her lips are so soft even when she’s being rough, not kissing her back isn’t an option.

She adds tongue, then bites your bottom lip out of nowhere and doesn’t let go. You moan.

She takes you off the door to push you into the sink. Right when you’re about to hop up onto the sink counter behind you, she flips you around so you face the mirror.

Angela uses her hips to push you into the counter and pulls your hair back.

“Why do you insist on fucking with me?” she whispers into your ear.

“Because you get like this,” you say back. She looks at you over your shoulder through the mirror and shakes her head.

“I fucking hate you, you know,” she says, pulling your hair back even more.

You yelp a little. “I know.”

After grabbing your boob for good measure, her free hand lowers to your thigh and she travels upward to between your skirt and underwear.

“Let me know if you still want to flirt with her,” Angela says smugly into the back of your neck. She moves your underwear aside and pushes two fingers into you with no warning. You moan loudly.

Her left hand releases your hair to cover your mouth.

“Quiet, Y/n,” she whispers into your ear. “You wouldn’t want to make someone jealous.”

You whimper at that.

You try to say into her hand “I’m sorry,” but it comes out as an incoherent mumble.

“What was that?” she asks condescendingly, fingers moving quickly inside you. Your hips rock back into her front.

She releases your mouth to grab a hold on your jaw.

“I’m sorry,” you say while stifling any moan.

“I know,” Angela says and the tension in your lower abdomen releases. She sticks the forefinger and middle finger of her left hand into your mouth to attempt to discourage any moaning. The moans are muffled as you suck her fingers.

Angela removes her hand from beneath your skirt, wiping her fingers on your bare thigh, and slaps your ass hard.

“Don’t fucking do that again,” she says as you make eye contact through the mirror and she exits.

#this happened #i apologize for i have sinned #angela thoughts

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snickerzanddoodlez · 6 months

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Finally Doing one of These!

ABOUT ME

NAME: SnickerDoodlez / SnickerzandDoodlez / Snickernova Doodlez

Nickname: Any variation of this! Snicky, Snicker, Doodlez, Snickerz, SnickyD…

Main Social: https://youtube.com/@snickerdoodlez9210?si=ZXtyZJl8kPCLS8iB

And as for Tumblr, you’ll see me more on @crown-of-roses-thsc !

She/Her; Straight; Minor

Hobbies/Skills: Drawing, Animating, Coding (learning), Writing

Language: English, American Sign Language (learning)

Neurodivergencies: OCD, ADHD, Major Depressive Disorder, maybe Autistic

Random Facts:

-I’m a theatre kid!

-I love horror / disturbing things, maybe a little too much

-I grew up on the Warriors fandom, and that’s an angsty angsty burden I’ll carry into every fandom I join

-I’m the director of Wordgirl Rewired!

-I’m a Christian, but don’t let that scare you off- I’m just here to have fun & spread positive vibes! *sticks a golden star sticker to your forehead* And I’m a huge horror fan…and fantasy fan….and I draw a lot of gore….Christians stop gatekeeping creativity (impossible? Not clickbait? Don’t try at 3:AM???)

Oh, and Friendly reminder to my fellow Christians that if you’re cursing someone out for doing or believing or BEING something you don’t agree with, you’re literally doing the opposite of what Jesus did….and I think you’ve got a might big plank in your eye that ya need to take out ;)

Sona:

~READ MORE FOR WAY TOO MUCH INFO~

Fandoms:

Wordgirl

The Henry Stickmin Collection

Don’t Starve / Don’t Starve Together

Wings of Fire

Warrior Cats

A Hat in Time

Wild Kratts

UnderTale / UnderTale Yellow

Favorite Movies:

Fantastic Mr. Fox

Live-Action Beauty and the Beast

Princess and The Frog

Secondhand Lions

Lilo and Stitch

Stranger Than Fiction

Into The Woods

Isle of Dogs

The Greatest Showman

Les Miserablés

Padak

The Rise of Miss Power

Coraline

School of Rock

Favorite Musicals:

Beetlejuice

Phantom of the Opera

Into The Woods

Les Miserablés

Heathers

Guys and Dolls

Favorite Color:

Magenta

Favorite Show:

Spy x Family

Wordgirl

Gravity Falls

DuckTales 2017

Camp Camp

Bojack Horseman

Parks and Recreation

Favorite Song:

House of Memories (Panic! At the Disco)

As the World Caves In (Matt Maltese)

Please Never Fall in Love Again (Ollie MN)

Karma (AJR)

Red Flags (Tom Cardy)

Lost One’s Weeping (Neru)

Cupid (Jack Stauber)

Goodbye to a World (Porter Robinson)

Sweet Rosalie (American Murder Songs)

No Children (The Mountain Goats)

The Haunted Phonograph (ThouShaltNot)

Puff The Magic Dragon (Peter, Paul & Mary)

The Ballad of Billy The Kid (Billy Joel)

Stranded Lullaby (Miracle Musical)

Business Man (Tom Cardy)

Favorite Song Artist:

The Stupendium

They Might Be Giants

The Mountain Goats

Jack Stauber

Lemon Demon

Evelyn Evelyn

Tally Hall

American Murder Songs

Mother Mother

Kaden McKay

Favorite Book:

Crookedstar’s Promise

School for Good and Evil

Warrior Cats (Arc 1)

The Bunker Diaries

Prisoner of Azkaban

Survivor Dogs

Favorite Food:

French Fries

Croutons

Goldfish

Kanelope

Favorite Game:

A Hat in Time

The Henry Stickmin Collection

Splatoon

Wolf Quest: Anniversary Addition

Don’t Starve Together

King’s Quest

The Witch’s House

Super Paper Mario

Cuphead

Undertale

Favorite Animal:

Tasmanian Devils

Rats

Kangaroos / Wallabies

Komodo Dragons

Dragons

Pigeons

MY BABY BOYS:

(Note: I am not defending any of these characters, and these are not fictional crushes. I just like skrunkly little fictional simps and gravitate towards the characters everyone hates)

Felix White (Henry Stickmin)

Tobey (Wordgirl)

Nuka (The Lion King 2)

Whisper (Survivors)

Spike (My Little Pony)

Spike (Friendship Is Witchcraft)

Minetta (My Hero Acedamia)

Hort (School For Good and Evil)

Sheldon (Splatoon)

Lefou (Beauty and The Beast)

Tammy (Tammy)

Plankton (Spongebob)

Zach (Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt)

One-Eyed Wally (Amphibia)

Emmet (Legally Blonde)

Dr. Hare (Poptropica)

Todd (Bojack Horseman)

Muck (Bob the Builder)

Octavio (Splatoon)

Pokétwo (Discord)

Tom (Parks and Recreation)

Rumplestiltskin (Shrek 4)

Squid (Wings of Fire)

Darkheart (Care Bears II: The Next Generation)

Zach Varmitech (Wild Kratts)

Garry (Ib)

Bartok (Anastasia)

David (Camp Camp)

Varian (Tangled the Series)

Frankie (Spy x Family)

Mayor Humdinger (Paw Patrol: Movies)

Mortimer Freeze (Cuphead: The Delicious Last Course)

Wally Warbles (Cuphead)

The Peas (VeggieTales)

Chameleon (Wings of Fire)

Jax (The Amazing Digital Circus)

Wilson (Don’t Starve)

Mad Dummy (Undertale)

Napstablook (UnderTale)

Toad (Mario)

Flick (Animal Crossing: New Horizons)

Ares (Percy Jackson)

Louie (DuckTales)

Gyro Gearloose (DuckTales)

Sirius Black (Harry Potter)

Hawt Sauce (Chikn Nuggit)

Swiftpaw (Warrior Cats)

#intro #about me #SnickerDoodlez

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wildrangers · 2 years

Text

The Moon & Her Sun // Josh Kiszka {3}

Chapter Three // Strength

Josh Kiszka x fem! musician reader

Word Count: 3K

start here!

Hi y'all! This will be a multi-part, slow burn story so buckle up. Also, the titles will be very tarot-based but I am by no means an expert.

Warnings: Swearing, anxiety/panic attacks, mentions of domestic violence, slut-shaming, misogyny, drinking (plz let me know I missed any!)

*18+ only, smut will happen later in the series*

Josh stepped in front of you to block the spray of champagne Sam was releasing all over the hotel room.

“We fucking did it!” Sammy screamed, causing whoops and cheers from the others. Once Josh was sure it was safe, he moved to your side, cheeks flushing as you shot him a grateful grin.

“What a gentleman” you teased, only making his face heat more as he nudged your shoulder with his own. “I really love that jumpsuit, by the way.”

He looked down at his white and gold outfit, which was honestly one of his favorites. “Thanks, you looked great out there too. And now, of course.” You rolled your eyes at the compliment, “What a flatterer, Joshua.”

His grin widened even more as you used his full name. You had taken to doing so whenever you decided to tease him, which was quite often.

“A toast to Rising Sirens for setting the stage for an amazing night of music!” Jake cheered and everyone took a swig of their drinks.

“A toast to Greta Van Fleet for graciously inviting us on their tour!” Carolina replied, another cheer filling the room before everyone drank more. At this rate, things were likely to get messy by the end of the night. You wondered over to Danny, who was sitting on the couch taking in the scene before him. You struck up a conversation and Josh smiled softly at the way you both seemed to relax whenever you found each other in a busy room. Josh, on the other hand, flourished in a crowd.

He made his way from person to person, doing shots with Carolina before making his way over to Sam, Jake, and Kimmy who were playing some kind of drinking game they were inventing on the fly. Josh watched, amused as Kimmy managed to manipulate the game to win every time, taking advantage of how tipsy his brothers were. The game didn’t last long as Sam wondered off to go pester Carolina. Those two were dangerous together—constantly cooking up bad ideas but having the best time doing so. Kimmy sat beside Caleb who was, unsurprisingly, keeping to himself, leaving Josh with his twin.

“You and Y/N looked amazing together tonight, man” Jake slurred, clapping him on the back. Josh’s eyes darted over to you and Danny, confirming you weren’t in earshot.

“Dude, don’t say shit like that, you know how big of a step tonight was for her. We’re just friends” Josh admonished Jake who only held up his hands in surrender.

“Yeah, yeah, you two can say that all you want but people don’t look at each other like that unless they’re falling in love.”

Josh felt his cheeks warm at Jake’s words. Sure, he was infatuated with you but in love? It had barely been a month since you’d met. Drunk Jake had a habit of making grandiose statements so Josh rolled his eyes and steered the conversation elsewhere as they continued celebrating.

***

You were thoroughly enjoying your evening. You and Danny were discussing different books you’d read and the atmosphere of the room was pleasant without being overwhelming. As Danny excused himself to grab another beer, you opened your phone to scroll through Instagram. You instantly regretted your choice as you looked at your most recent post, a photo of your band from earlier tonight.

Typical, Y/N fucking her way up the food chain

How shameless can she be? Did you see her and Josh?

Sluts will be sluts, I guess

You quickly shut your phone, immediately sobering up as tears pricked your eyes. You got up and left the room, hoping no one noticed as you stumbled to your room, fighting back tears and panic. It was happening again.

You fumbled with your key card as your vision blurred before a soft hand covered your own, guiding it into the slot. You weren’t surprised when you looked up to see Josh peering at you with concern.

“What’s going on, mama?” he asked and you burst into tears right there in the hallway. He rubbed your back soothingly, guiding you into the room and locking the door behind himself. Each time you tried to explain what was happening, you felt your throat tighten with emotion and panic. You felt like you were going to pass out and began gasping for air.

“Hey, hey, look at me, okay?” Josh said sternly and your eyes darted up to his.

“There you are, good job. Now breath with me. In…good, and out...great job Y/N/N. Let’s do it again.” He repeated the steps until you felt like you could finally breathe again, air filling your lungs and calming your racing heart. You still didn’t have words yet, so you opened your phone and placed it in his hands once your most recent post was displayed.

You laid your head on the back of the couch, continuing your deep breathing as you felt the panic slowly but surely leaving your body. You hadn’t had a panic attack in months and you certainly hadn’t missed the sensation.

“Those fucking assholes” Josh murmured angrily and you turned your head to look at him. His face was twisted with fury, cheeks red with rage. “I’m so sorry that happened, you were amazing tonight. Please try to not to let them ruin it. Most of these comments are showering you with the praise you deserve.”

You nodded sadly, your lips trembling again. He ran his thumb along your bottom lip, as if trying to stop their shaking with his touch alone.

“Thank you for helping me, Josh.”

“Of course, Y/N/N. What else can I do? I want to post something on my page but only if you’re okay with that. I won’t do it if it’ll make you uncomfortable or if you think it’ll just make it worse.”

You mulled over his offer, wrapping your fingers around his and settling them onto your lap. “I’m okay with you posting about tonight and including something about it but please don’t make it just about that. Tonight was about way more than them.”

He nodded, placing a quick kiss on your palm before pulling out his phone and creating a post using some of the professional photos taken at the show. You rested your head on his shoulder, watching as he selected which pictures to include. Most of them were of the guys but the final one was a shot of the two of you gazing into each other’s eyes during the final part of ‘You’re Still the One.’

He typed out a quick caption before shutting his phone off entirely and tossing it onto the table. You mirrored his motions, relieved that you wouldn’t have to look at your social media again tonight.

“You do have to admit we make quite the pair” Josh murmured softly, tracing patterns onto your palms. You stilled at the comment, shutting your eyes for a moment.

“Josh, I can’t give you what you want.”

He watched as you pulled away, crossing your legs as you turned to face him fully. “And what do you think I want?”

“Me. Us. A relationship.”

“Do you not want those things?”

You sighed, playing with the ends of your hair to avoid his gaze. “I don’t know.”

“I don’t believe you, Y/N. I think you do know but don’t want to admit it.”

“Fine. I know that I want to keep getting to know you. I know I feel safe whenever you’re with me. I know you’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen. But I also know that I will always choose me first. I refuse to go back to putting me second and a relationship first.”

Silence fell over the two of you as he took in your words. “Do you want to hear what I know?” he questioned, lowering his head to force you to meet his eyes. You hesitated but finally nodded.

“I know that I’ve been drawn to you since I laid eyes on you. I know you are beautiful, inside and out. And I know you are the moon to my sun. But I also know you’ve been hurt and are still healing. And I need you to know I respect and understand that. As long as you allow me to stay in your life, you can offer me as much or as little you want and I’ll be thrilled to simply exist alongside you.”

Tears pricked at your eyes as you pulled him to you, locking him in a tight embrace. He held you to his chest as he rubbed your back soothingly, face buried into the crook of your neck. It felt like you’d been made to stay locked in each other’s embrace for eternity. As you pulled away slightly, you rested your forehead against his. “Thank you” you whispered, eyes rising to meet his.

“You have nothing to thank me for” he smiled. You stayed like that for several moments, simply enjoying being so close to one another. But you weren’t ready for anything else yet; it still felt too real, too soon.

“Stay? Just to sleep. I don’t want to be alone” you whispered.

“I’d love to” he nodded, kissing your forehead before going back to his room to change into PJ’s. By the time he returned, you were curled up in bed in a baggy tee, fighting your eyes. You felt him lay behind you, pulling you to his chest as he placed a gentle kiss on your shoulder. “Sweet dreams” he whispered against your skin.

***

The first month of tour flew by. Most days ended exactly how they had that first night—you wrapped in Josh’s arms. You still hadn’t done anything physical; Josh understood your fears and respected them—just being in your presence was enough for him for now.

Today was going to be a one-day festival with Rising Sirens playing around noon and Greta Van Fleet later in the afternoon. The boys were all backstage as Rising Sirens played, enjoying the atmosphere, the music, and the beautiful weather. Over the last few weeks, Jake had somehow cracked Caleb’s shell. The two talked endlessly about guitars and melodies and songwriting. Caleb had even allowed Jake to sometimes sit in and add notes while they worked on the new album.

This new closeness was how Josh got to the enjoy the sight of his twin playing alongside Caleb on their most guitar-heavy song. The two were out of this world and the crowd was eating it up as you danced around the stage. Josh was bewitched by the soft smile on your face as you moved effortlessly about the stage, lost in the simple joy of moving your body to rock n’ roll.

Soon enough, your set was over and everyone made their way to GVF’s bus to cool off. Sam was fiddling with his phone, arguing with Carolina about what to play over the speakers. Josh watched as you smirked and shook your head at the two before settling beside him, head resting on his shoulder.

“You were incredible today, mama” Josh whispered, placing a quick kiss on the top of your head.

“Thanks, Joshy. I forgot how much I love the energy at festivals” you replied, moving back to smile up at him. His heart still insisted on hammering in his chest every time you looked at him like that. Before he could continue, all-out war broke out across the way.

“Sam! I am so sick of you picking the same shit over and over again. Let me switch it up!” Carolina yelled in frustration.

“No way, you’re just going to play that pop shit you listen to! Absolutely not” he shook his head, raising his phone up high as Carolina leapt to try and grab it.

“Children! Let’s put it to a vote, yeah?” Jake suggested, rolling his eyes at their behavior. The two glared at each other but reluctantly agreed. As everyone voted, the group was split down the middle, leaving Josh as the deciding vote. While he normally sided with his brother on these matters, he just couldn’t resist the puppy dog eyes you were shooting his way as you squeezed his hand.

“Y/N! That’s cheating, stop it” Sam begged, feeling defeat approaching.

“I’m sorry man, I’m gonna go with Carolina on this one” Josh finally answered, drawing a whoop from Carolina as she wrestled the phone out of Sam’s hand.

“Et tu, Brutus?” Sam asked, shaking his head. “I thought you’d put me, your baby brother, before the girl you’re dating.”

Josh froze at his words but you roared with laughter next to him. “Just because he likes me better doesn’t mean you have to start spreading rumors, Samuel” you teased. Sam’s eyes darted between the two of you before he descended, fingers tickling your sides.

“Samuel! Stop!” you laughed, trying to get him off as you fought for breath. “Are you fucking five?”

“I’m avenging myself, Y/N/N, someone must pay!” Sam jokingly shouted. Josh smiled as you two playfully wrestled on the floor together, shaking his head at your antics.

***

Finally on stage several hours later, Josh felt electric. The crowd was totally invested and he felt like he and his brothers were hitting their stride, soaking up the positive energy of the audience. He was excited for you to join him onstage soon; he absolutely cherished your duets, each night’s performance feeling more and more intimate. Luckily, the hateful comments had largely stopped on your page after he had shared that initial opening night post. He hadn’t yet found the courage to tell you that his comments were filled with people debating ship names for the two of you.

Before he knew it, you were beside him singing the opening notes of ‘You’re the One.’ He was transfixed as you sang, finding himself lost in your joy-filled eyes. You were always most beautiful to him when you sang—you looked so exuberant and alive. To his surprise and delight, as the song concluded you wrapped him in a hug as the fans cheered before making your way backstage again. He felt the warmth of your embrace for the rest of the show, feeling like he was floating on air.

***

Josh was incredible. You mean, he always was but he seemed to be outdoing himself somehow today. The rest of Rising Sirens had wondered off to see other bands or get more drinks but you stayed in your spot alongside the stage. As the boys were in the midst of their final song, you heard slow, drawn-out applause coming from behind you. You tensed, somehow sensing it was Max before he drawled out, “What a show you two put on out there.”

You braced herself before turning towards him, “Thank you.” You knew he was being sarcastic and trying to insult you but you refused to take the bait. His smirk made you feel edgy as he walked closer. “I didn’t know We are the Champions were playing today.”

“Well, surprise, darling, here I am! And to think I was making my way over to congratulate you on your set earlier only to find you wrapped up with your new man.”

“Josh and I are none of your business. I want you to leave. Now.”

He laughed coldly. “And here I was thinking I was special. I guess the critics were right, you really were just fucking your way to the top. Too bad you had to stoop down a level from me this time around.”

“Fuck. Off. Max. Or I swear to God, I will call security over here.”

“I’m allowed to be here just as much as you are” he smirked, leaning closer.

“Actually, you’re not” you heard Josh’s voice behind you and nearly sagged with relief. If he was here, they all were and that meant you weren’t alone anymore—you were safe. He couldn’t hurt you.

“Sorry man, I don’t think you own the stage. Y/N and I were just catching up, you can move along.”

“No, actually we weren’t. I don’t have anything to say to you.” Max turned his gaze to you, surprise crossing his features. He clearly wasn’t expecting the backbone he’d methodically broken down to have grown back firm and strong in his absence.

“Why so harsh, Y/N/N? Didn’t you miss me?” he fake-frowned, hand grasping your shoulder. Before you could respond, a fist soared over you, colliding with the side of Max’s head. You were shocked to see it was Danny who threw the punch, Sam following with a shove to Max’s chest that left him off balance.

“Fuck off, Max. We know exactly what you are and if you so much as look at Y/N again, we’ll let everyone else know too. We will ruin you, understood?” Jake growled, placing a hand on your shoulder. Your eyes darted between each of the boys, gratitude and overwhelm filling your chest.

“Whatever, keep your stupid slut” Max spat, wiping the side of his mouth that had split open.

“Fuck you, Y/N has more talent in her pinky finger than your entire, pathetic self does. So, fuck off or we’ll call security and have you removed from this event” Josh stated, standing tall beside you.

Max had nothing to say to that, shooting you a glare before wondering off. Once he was gone, Josh wrapped his arms around you, holding you as you shook.

“Shhh, it’s okay Y/N/N, we’re all right here” he said, smoothing down your hair and rocking you slightly. Once the adrenaline left your system, you turned to the other guys, pulling them into a group hug, squeezing tight.

“I can’t express how grateful I am for all of you. That meant the world to me” you said, voice shaky as you fought back more tears.

“We’re just sorry we weren’t here when he first came over, we didn’t see him until we were leaving the stage” Danny explained, running soothing motions down your back.

“It’s okay, you guys came at just the right moment. I needed to know I could face him again. And I could, that’s why he was getting so mad.”

“We’ve got you, always, okay? If he messes with you, he’s fucking with all of us” Jake said, eyes still simmering with anger.

“Yeah, we’ll rock his shit!” Sammy said, jokingly boxing the air and drawing a laugh from you.

“I do have to say, I was pretty impressed with that punch, Danny” you smiled, checking his knuckles, relieved to see no damage had been done.

read on here !

A/N: I hope you enjoyed this installment :) I am thinking this will probably be about 6 parts total and this will be the last direct depiction/description of the misogyny/DV situation. I know that's hard for some to read but I felt it was important to this character and the story. As always I am open to any feedback & please let me know if you want to join a tag list!

#greta van fleet x reader #greta van fleet imagine #greta van fleet #josh kiszka #josh kiszka x reader #josh kiszka fic #josh kiszka imagine #jake kiszka #sam kiszka #danny wagner #gvf #gvf imagine #moon and her sun series

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byneddiedingo · 6 months

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Asia Argento and Willem Dafoe in New Rose Hotel (Abel Ferrara, 1998)

Cast: Christopher Walken, Willem Dafoe, Asia Argento, Annabella Sciorra, John Lurie, Kimmy Suzuki, Miou, Yoshitaka Amano, Gretchen Mol, Phil Neilson, Ken Kelsch, Ryuiki Sakamoto. Screenplay: Abel Ferrara, Christ Zois, based on a story by William Gibson. Cinematography: Ken Kelsch. Production design: Frank DeCurtis. Film editing: Jim Mol, Anthony Redman. Music: Schoolly D.

Abel Ferrara's New Rose Hotel is more an exercise in style than a satisfactory movie. The plot is simple: Fox (Christopher Walken) and X (Willem Dafoe) are agents for a Japanese technology firm plot tasked with raiding a top scientist from a German company. They do so by hiring a beautiful prostitute called Sandii (Asia Argento) to seduce the scientist, whom they will set up in a laboratory in Marrakech. The plot goes awry when one of the agents falls in love with Sandii and overlooks some evidence that she may be working for the German company, putting the agents in danger. Padding this plot into a 93-minute movie means a lot of filler, including an extended opening scene set in a kinky nightclub where some lugubrious songs get sung and the necessary exposition gets spilled. Then there are some irrelevant sex scenes while the scheme is being set up, and after it fails there are extended flashbacks that add little to our understanding of what has happened. The three leads are capable and watchable, but the film leaves us with no revelations about corporate rivalry in the age of technology that we haven't seen in better movies.

#New Rose Hotel #Abel Ferrara #Asia Argento #Willem Dafoe

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dingbingbats · 6 months

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would've done this sooner but i was tagged around when i was shadowbanned lol

coke or pepsi? dr pepper unless cherried coke

disney or dreamworks? #shreksweep

coffee or tea? somda...

books or movies? uhhhhhh. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

windows or mac? windows all the way

dc or marvel? i just like james gunn's work o

x-box or playstation? nint swi

dragon age or mass effect? haven't touched either ever

night owl or early riser? night owl alright

cards or chess? no bongcloud in cards :(

chocolate or vanilla? choclayate all the way

vans or converse? shoes is shoes

Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash, or Adaar? no fuckin clue what those are

fluff or angst? both's good

beach or forest? depends on bugs

dogs or cats? kimmy

clear skies or rain? rain it's too hot here usually

cooking or eating out? eating out ig. sensory issue...

spicy food or mild food? my spice tolerance is below sea level

halloween/samhain or solstice/yule/christmas? idrk at this point. month off school but family and no friends

would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot? neither what is wrong with you. cold ig

if you could have a superpower, what would it be? shapeshifting or invisibility ez

animation or live action? animation (esp 2d, pixel, and stop mo) but practical effects are sick as hell

paragon or renegade? whichever is funnier

baths or showers? bath

team cap or team ironman? taylor hebert kill them with spiders. but eh ig i like captain america in terms of representing progress (and not being a billionaire)

fantasy or sci-fi? fantasy but i do like sci-fi elements

do you have three or four favourite quotes, if so what are they? idk but there are some shitposts that replay in my mind on a semiregular basis

youtube or netflix? youtube ig

[REDACTED]

when do you feel accomplished? when im doing better than someone else tbh

star wars or star trek? i like the funi robots

paperback books or hardcover books? hardcover

to live in a world without literature or without music? depends on if we count comics as literature i think

who was the last person to make you laugh? idk

city or countryside? city

favorite chips? fucked up in the club eating detos

pants or dresses? pants

libraries or museums? natural history museums

character driven stories or plot driven stories? that juicy midpoint.

bookmarks or folding pages? bookmarks wtf is wrong w/ you

Dream job? i do not dream of labor. money for having opinions would be nice tho

What gives you comfort? friends, blorbos and catharsis

what are some of your favorite song lyrics? chorus, "Nobodyʼs perfect anymore / So why canʼt I be your golden boy?", all of this

favorite ice cream flavor ever?

tagging others, add your own new question at the end if you follow up: @rapt0r @that-one-empty-skull @tatangadragon @not-too-many-eyes

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bigbadripley · 1 year

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Chapter 14 - Redrum

Marc Spector/Steven Grant x Female!OC

Summary: Marc never expected to see his childhood friend Simone ever again. To Simone, Marc may as well have been dead. However, when Simone met Steven 15 years after Marc disappeared, she couldn’t help but notice how familiar he was.

Warnings: Heavy language, OC with religious trauma, childhood trauma, sexual trauma. Physical and emotional abuse of a minor, lots of angst, alcohol, painkillers, marijuana mention, homophobia, violence, tw! SA, death mention

A/N: This chapter is heavy, please be careful and read the tags. There are periodic flashback chapters, this is one of them. I update warnings with each chapter. Only proceed if you can handle the themes included in the warnings. I wrote this entirely as a trauma dump.

Minors DNI, DL;DR, if I miss a warning, please let me know.

Chapter list

"He told me in due time everything will be fine You could always flip your soul for like $9.99 Watch these problems go away and your family will be straight Just know you'll never get to see the gold on Heaven's gates" -"Redrum" by 99 Neighbors

Moni's mother didn't need much convincing to allow her to stay the night with Ericka. The girls hatched a plan to bring it up with Ericka's parents first, then Moni's ma, then have them call each other. Somehow, it worked out perfectly, and they were in pajamas listening to music in Ericka's bedroom that very weekend.

"What about Kimmy?" Moni asked as she pointed to a photo of a cute girl with glasses in their senior yearbook they had received the day before. The song "Like A Stone" by Audioslave played softly from the CD player as Ericka eyed the photo for a moment and shook her head,

"She's nice but not my type."

"I don't think your type exists. You've shot down every suggestion I've made!" Moni said as she closed the book and placed it between them on the bed. Ericka shrugged,

"Only because I don't like them!"

"Shit, at this point, I think you just wanna kiss me," Moni joked. Her friend pursed her mouth and allowed her eyes to drift to Moni's lips. Moni noticed this but dismissed it in her mind even as her hands grew clammy.

"Not unless you're good at it," Ericka stated, tone lighthearted. Moni matched her style,

"I've never had any complaints," She played cocky to impress her, as Ericka was the coolest girl she'd ever known.

The girls laughed nervously, Ericka with total concentration on Moni, having a slight crush on the girl for quite some time. On the other hand, Moni wasn't sure and certainly didn't think Ericka felt that way.

"Then can I kiss you?" Ericka asked reluctantly. Moni was stunned and nearly frozen at the question. One half of her brain told her no, and the other told her yes, please. What came from her mouth was a compromise.

"If you want to," Moni replied, slowly moving the hardcover picturebook to the other side of her body. She wasn't sure if Ericka was joking anymore and almost passed it off as one until Ericka went for it, placing slightly puckered lips to Moni's unprepared mouth.

Moni couldn't tell if she was into it or not but guided Ericka through the kiss the only way she'd ever known them to be. Regardless of the strange sensation that mirrored anxiety, kissing Ericka was easier than kissing any boy. Her heart fluttered just as well.

Ericka's plush lips felt like crushed velvet and tasted like the strawberry milkshake she sipped. She smelled like flowers and citrus and all of the nice things that Moni had never noticed before then, now so close she could hear her heart race with each brush of their tongues. A rock formed in the pit of her stomach-

Is this what it's supposed to feel like?

The girls were abruptly interrupted by Ericka's bedroom door creaking open quickly, causing them to kick away from each other in a panic as Ericka's mother's face went from delight to sheer horror.

"Mom, I-"

"We were just-"

They both started but were cut off right away.

"I think you need to leave, Simone." Erika's mother said, face stern and arms crossed.

Simone grabbed her overnight bag and started walking back home, fearful of what Ericka's parents would do. If they were anything like Moni's mom, it would be rough.

Moni found that she had no way out of this one when she arrived home to find her mother standing, waiting for her with the phone in her hand. What seemed to worry Moni the most was that there were tiny sheets of paper spread around the table, the notes from inside Loser Jones and the doctor's notes she had practiced forging to get out of school.

Along with all of that was a small plastic baggy with a little bit of pot in it that she was tasked to hold onto by Ericka. She stared at the contraband intensely, amazed at how her mother yelled more about the sex notes and her "homosexuality" than the drugs.

This would be the final straw. This was the night when it was decided that she would be sent to stay with her tío.

Uncle Luis was Moni's father's eldest brother and the only one out of 3 uncles who happened to still be alive at the time despite his habits. He would claim it was because God willed it to be, but Moni and Marc would joke that it was because it was hard to kill a cockroach.

He was a big guy with a beer gut and an appetite for whiskey, painkillers, and young women. Nobody seemed to know his cap on "how young is too young?" though. He happened to be Moni's godfather, as well and offered to help raise her after her father went in the clink. Estefania declined for pride's sake, but Luis kept the offer on the table and pushed harder the older Moni got.

This was a red flag for Moni that went unnoticed by her mamá.

Once Moni arrived at the old man's house, it was clear he smoked like a train and drank like a mule by the state of the place. The house was a two-bedroom, one-bath, so the space wasn't copious, to begin with. The addition of the empty liquor bottles that flooded the place didn't help, and the overflowing ashtrays on every surface made matters worse.

She was tasked with cleaning, cooking, and preparing his drinks, as well as upholding the rules of only wearing long skirts and dresses around the house, saying grace before every meal, and never listening to secular music. It was like being part of a fucked up cult with the added bonus of getting to sneak the least smoked butts out of the ashtrays for safekeeping before dumping them out.

The old man's policies were bearable compared to what he did when he was filled with oxycodone and hard liquor. That was when the holy man everyone assumed him to be did things he would only repeat in confessional and expect to atone for through a few Hail Marys.

Moni couldn't do much about the arrangement due to her age and graduation being a mere month away. She tried to sneak a call to her mother, hoping she would let her come home, but all Moni got was an earful of Spanish expletives and a paddle to her rear when tío Luis caught her using the phone.

There was never a waking moment where Moni wasn't uncomfortable in that house. If she did anything wrong, she got paddled. If he did anything right, she got her uncle's idea of positive reinforcement, which was just making her sit on his lap while he told her how special and beautiful she was.

Aside from trying to feel clean by scrubbing herself raw every day in the shower, she started smoking the butts she saved once the old man was passed out for the night. She relished the burning sensation of the too-hot tip between her fingers and lips when the tobacco was too low to smoke. It made her feel more comfortable than that place did and gave her a modicum of control.

She often dreamt of Marc busting her out of there like he said he would. She still missed him and even kept his note to her in her Chuck Taylor shoe box.

As for her friendship with Ericka, they were only allowed to see each other in class and mass. Mrs. Fatu was convinced that Moni was at fault for kissing her daughter, and everyone who heard about what happened had the same idea.

As always, Moni was the bad kid. Corruptor. Sinner. Whore. It became clear that her mother sent her away for reformation and to save herself the embarrassment of having to stick up for her daughter to clear her own image.

After three weeks at her tío's, the final straw for Moni was when the disgusting man pressed himself against her while she was cooking dinner, grinding against her buttocks as she silently wept. The tears ran down her cheeks as she felt a scream trapped in her lungs, refusing to escape like a fever dream. She was seventeen, but her mind regressed to ten years old, powerless to stop it. Mushy, fresh-faced, spineless. All she could do was stare blankly at the nicotine-stained backsplash and blink.

Do you need help? Blink once for yes, twice for no.

She was trapped in her own body between the old man and the stove for what felt like an eternity, sinking closer and closer to the gas burner and imagining the flame catching her dress.

It would be better.

Her breath was caught in her windpipe, and declined to move, afraid of the exhale sounding pleasurable.

Don't let him hear you breathe. Don't give him the satisfaction.

Then it was over; the back of her dress was damp, and her pancakes had burned.

That was the day she decided to kill her uncle. After a lifetime of being told that the things happening around her weren't true-

You're a liar. You remember things wrong. You're a temptress. You're a whore. You deserved it. You don't know what pain is.

That damp fabric patch on her bottom reminded her that what happened was real. There was no faking what happened, no imagining it. Though nobody else would believe her-

I know what happened. I know everything that happened under this roof. I'll be damned if I don't do something to stop it. You'll go to hell for this, and I'll see you there.

Tío should have never trusted her with his drinks, as it was ultimately her crushing five of his pills into the whiskey he nearly drowned himself in every night that ended his life. She pulverized the pills into the finest white powder she could. She tasted the concoction with her fingertip when she mixed it up: it tasted like poison. He wouldn't know the difference.

The big fish eat the little ones until the little fish think faster.

When Moni called the police the following morning, she swore she could be a politician, utterly devoid of all blame. She cried and shed hot tears and snot, but not for him or his soul. They didn't suspect her and ruled it an accidental overdose.

May he rest in piss.

Her mother was terrified of her after that. She knew what had happened just as well as Moni did.

"¡Regresa al infierno! ¡demonio!" Her mother yelled at her when she came home, tears in her eyes and rosary in hand. Mamá told her to go to hell. Called her the devil.

Moni felt like she had already been there and saw red as her mother screamed at the sight of her only daughter.

Me? The devil? Even with what that sicko did?

In her rage, she tried to rip the religious beads from her mother's hands, and they broke, scattering them all over the floor with small ticks as they bounced across the tile. Moni had never seen her mother cry before. She would never see her cry again.

Due to her suspension, she couldn't walk the stage with her classmates but still received her diploma and graduated on the principal's roll. Moni got a job at a local deli and made enough money in tips to get a laptop. That cheap Dell started Simone's journey, meeting Joyce and getting her scholarships. That was it for her time in Chi-town.

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