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ironmandeficiency · 1 year

Text

council meetings

pairing: kíli / fem!reader (established)

word count: 1349

summary: politics suck worse than kíli does at keeping a secret

req: "do you want me to kill that guy for you? because he seems like a real dick and i would totally kill that guy for you." + "an annoyed but affectionate slap to the back of the head" with kili?

a/n: he’s such a dork and i love him very much

read on ao3

being an advisor to the king of erebor was no breezy endeavor. the heavy workload that came with continuous restoration efforts, four headstrong durins, and that’s not even counting the most uncomfortable chairs your ass has ever sat in.

the worst part, though? it had to be when fellow councilmembers didn’t take you seriously because of your lack of graying hair. every disparaging comment made about your youth tested your patience and almost had you showing your age by bounding the table and choking them by their own beards.

your inexperience in a formal setting, silly notes passed to cheeky princes, your sneezes when the dust of a withering tome invaded your nose — the old snots took them all as signs you were unfit for office. they questioned every bill you proposed and called you a foolish child (among other things) every time you disagreed with them.

speaking of silly notes and cheeky princes- you felt a tap against your foot under the table. of course it was your kíli, trying to get your attention so you could accept the note he wrote you.

“do you want me to kill that guy for you, ghivashel? because he seems like a real dick and i would totally kill that guy for you”

you snickered and stomped his foot under the table for nearly making you laugh. he didn’t react save for a smile and a playful wink.

once thorin was well enough to give orders as king, he appointed members of the quest as guild masters and seats on his royal council. having his shield brothers among him meant far more than the tradition of keeping nobles in positions of power, but he couldn’t blatantly show such favoritism this early into his reign.

bofur was named head of the miner’s guild and was clearly repulsed by political agendas and personal vendettas. he didn’t want to be here just as much as you. every time lord ashuk started his bitching, he would plop his hat over his eyes, kick his feet up on the table, and block out the bullshit.

lucky bastard.

that’s why you wished you were anywhere else other than where you were right now. sitting in the council chambers at the asscrack of dawn with nobles and guild masters all around, a vacation would be the least amount of compensation you’d accept for your suffering.

maybe mordor was pleasant this time of year.

this ridiculous session was only happening courtesy of lord ashuk, a noble who got his moniker during the battle of azanulbizar for his excellent hiding and pissing skills. no one knew why he was on thorin’s council to begin with, much less why he hadn’t been ousted before now.

he was determined to question the integrity of every other dwarf on the council simply to make himself look superior.

as per ashuk’s personal itinerary, no session is truly complete without your name getting a good dragging through the mud.

“there are far too many members of this council with no knowledge of the inner workings of erebor! and one of them is a woman, no less!” ashuk sent a nasty glare your way and you returned it to him tenfold.

it took every bit of willpower you could muster to not flip your hair oh so discreetly and reveal your status as future queen of erebor.

nearly every dwarf who reclaimed the mountain erupted into furious yelling. gloin shot his chair out from under him and called ashuk every foul name under the sun. this startled bofur from his dozing and with a quick update from bombur on what was going on, the miner rushed to your defense as well. dwalin’s voice was made clearer with the way his hands gripped the hilt of his axes.

even fíli, typically the calmer of the princes, was outraged. you were the sister he never had, one of his dearest friends and the second bravest woman he’d ever known behind his amad. you were soon to be his sister in law, for mahal’s sake! he had every intention of rising from his seat and getting in ashuk’s face to defend your honor, but thorin’s firm grip on his shoulder steadied him.

and your dear kíli, for all his typical silliness and cheerful disposition, could turn rightly sour when the time called for it.

the youngest prince may not be well-versed in politics, but he knew how to read the intentions of those around him. with every thinly veiled insult thrown at those around him, ashuk was blatantly questioning uncle’s decisions as king and ostracizing himself from the rest of the council.

to quote bilbo, ashuk was a hen stuck in the fox’s den.

kíli rose from his chair calmly, a fire in his eyes that many had never seen from him before now. balin noticed his moving to stand and went to pull him back down, but the attempt was shaken off.

as the other council members noticed the dark prince rising from his seat, their voices puttered out. young or not, kíli was still a prince and his status alone demanded attention and respect.

with a subtle nod, thorin told kíli to say his piece.

“i must disagree with you, ashuk.” the name was spit with all the disgust one gave when speaking of goblins. “it is my personal opinion that there are far too many members of this council that called their king a fool when he called for aid in reclaiming this very mountain.”

he leaned on the table, hands spread out as he leveled every noble with a cold stare. “nearly every noble in this room laughed in thorin’s face when he presented his plan to reclaim our home. yet now that the hard work was done for you, you expect to be treated with respect you didn’t earn.”

members of the company nod along, many of them beaming with pride at kíli. “you speak as if you intimately know the trials we had to face while you called us fools for facing smaug.”

“she can’t even stand up for herself!” ashuk interrupted when kíli paused for a breath.

that was the wrong thing to say, thorin mused to himself. balin was barely holding in a smug laugh because he knew exactly what kíli’s reply would be.

if kíli wasn’t angry before, he sure as shit was now. “your future queen should not have to justify her presence and capabilities to filth like you! she could have your beard on our mantle for the way you’ve spoken to her these past months and i don’t believe a single dwarf in here would object!”

well. this was decidedly not the way you planned on announcing your courting status to the others.

ashuk shared the same blank stare as a dead fish and it nearly had you and bofur doubling over in laughter. before everyone could erupt into yet another fit of chaos, thorin called the meeting adjourned and sent away those who weren’t of the company.

once the outsiders left, shouts of joy and laughter echoed through the lapis hall.

“did you see his face?! priceless!”

“if it weren’t so ugly, i’d like to preserve it!”

“i didn’t know ye had it in ye, lad! great job!”

“you’ve got yerself a good one, lassie!”

kíli went to your side after you both escaped all the well-wishes and hugs from the others. he kissed your temple lightly and pulled you into his embrace.

“thank you for telling off ashuk for me, my love.”

your prince grins and leans down for a kiss, which you happily give him. he’s distracted enough by you that he doesn’t notice your hand moving ever so slightly until he feels a thwack! on the back of his head.

he winces and moves a hand to rub at the sore spot, giving you his signature kicked puppy eyes. “that was for spoiling our surprise, kee.”

“you have to admit, my dear, it was a pretty interesting way to break the news.”

“you are definitely right about that.”

“as always!”

“don’t push it.”

#kili durin #kíli is a dumbass (affectionate)#kíli durin x reader #the company of thorin oakenshield #the hobbit fanfiction #the hobbit trilogy #the hobbit fanfic #kíli durin imagine

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