#the hobbit incorrect quotes
Tullaina: Ugh, crushes are so dumb.
Fili: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid.
Tullaina: But you’re always acting stupid?
Fili: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.
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*Merry and Pippin find something cool*
Pippin: Finders, keepers!
Merry: Losers…, I… Well, losers don’t get this cause it’s way too cool for a loser.
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Bain, in a high voice, holding barbie: Hey Ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!
Tilda, in a deep voice, holding ken: Nonsense, Barbie. You’re staying home and having my kids
Sigrid: What the fuck are you guys doing?
Tilda: Playing systemic oppression
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Bilbo: I swear to God if you continue to steal my kitchen utensils I'm moving out.
Bofur: That's a whisk I'm willing to take
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Thranduil: Elrond says I'm more akin to Dwarves than I admit it to myself.
Thranduil: We may live in caves, like jewels, are loyal to a fault and very stubborn, but our resemblance stops there.
Bard: Elrond may have a p-
Thranduil: Elrond is an idiot.
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Thorin: I have been thinking, I made a realisation about myself
Thorin: See, I noticed that, sometimes, perhaps, at most a very little...
Thorin: Not so much, it's a rare occurrence that I...
Bilbo: Go on...
Thorin: Might be a little proud and haughty.
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Tolkien fandom I need your help lol.
If anyone has that photo set the incorrect quote of Bard and Alfrid I would love to see it again 😭
It’s the one where Bard says at the end “it’s a small town Alfrid, I know where the fuck you live”
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Gandalf: I dislike you. You know that.
Pippin: Yes, I am aware of that.
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Fili: Talk dirty to me, baby~
Cassia: The dishes.
Cassia: They’ve been there for 4 days and it’s your turn to wash them. You still haven’t cleaned them and I have asked you to do so several times.
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Thranduil: What are you bringing to the feast?
Legolas: My negative attitude and sparkling personality
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Gandalf: Okay, nobody thinks Pippin's my son
Merry: Put your hand up if you thought Pippin is Gandalf's son
[Everyone raises their hand]
Gandalf: Put your had down Peregrin
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If you or a loved one has been turned into a hobbit, you may be entitled to financial compensation. Just call the number on the screen to hear from our experts.
Side effects may include a really upset Thorin if you don't get back here soon. He is really going nuts, pls come back so we can get some rest. Mans hasn't quit pacing for 2 hours. Are you in your half-dead garden or something?! Pls hurry up whatever you are doing Master Baggins ~The Company
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Gandalf, looking at Pippin: What the fuck is he doing now..
Boromir: His best.
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Merry: *gazing at the campfire he and Pippin had built* Hey, does something seem off to you?
Pippin: Yeah. This should have collapsed a long time ago.
￼Merry: Maybe we actually did something… No, that’s impossible.
Pippin: Say it.
Merry: Something right?
Merry: Ugh! I have a weird feeling inside. Is that… accomplishment?
Pippin: Whoa! I think I feel it too! Quick, let’s ￼go rub it in Gandalf’s face before the feeling subsides!
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Legolas: Ever since I taught Gimli about internet slang he's been going around the house talking like he's on Twitter
Gimli: *From the next room* Oof. What a call out, sis. The tea is scorching!
Legolas: Please. Stop
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Legolas: I CAN DO WHAT I WANT AND NO ONE WILL STOP ME
Tauriel: I'm calling King Thranduil
Legolas: no wait-
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Thranduil while trying to bake: You know it’s horrible now but I hope it turns out okay
Thranduil: Like children
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Frerin: ...and then we can jump out and stab him.
Thorin: *massaging his temples* has anyone ever told you you are stupid?
Frerin: People mostly just make a face. Dis says talking to me is a waste of energy.
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Legolas, looking at a menu: Mm…what do they have that’s gluten, dairy and sugar-free?
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Frodo: Time to reflect on the day…
Sam: Why do you do that to yourself?
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