#just kidding u can tell whoever LMAO | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nervousgardenerkid · 2 years

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highschool au steve (who’s friends with the party because fuck the king steve era he deserves good friends <3) where you’re his reluctant tutor and he’s convinced this is the start of a romcom where you two eventually fall in love but you’re just trying to tutor your cute annoying classmate because you need an excuse to get out of being dragged into joining a club and/or sport by your friends and tutoring can’t possibly be super hard right?

but eventually steve’s flirting gets to you and when he comes to your next tutoring session with an A on his latest paper you think he doesn’t need a tutor and are sad obviously happy to see he doesn’t need to be tutored anymore. cue steve being an in love idiot and purposefully flunking his next assignment so you can keep being his tutor. robin, who’s tired of his shit, tells you why his grades keep drastically fluctuating (because he wants to keep being tutored but also doesn’t want you to think you’re a bad tutor) which leads to (after some convincing from his children friends) you telling him if he gets an A on the next assignment you’ll go on a date with him <3

can u tell i got carried away again LMAO credit to whoever made the gif! i hope u like it hehe <3

Steve let out a sigh of defeat as he stared at the bright red F on his paper. He swears he did so well this time! Guess studying with Dustin didn't pay off. He felt a tap on his shoulder.

“Hey,” Robin whispered. “What did you get?”

Steve rolled his eyes showing her the paper.

“Dustin is a shitty tutor.”

“Did you guys even study?”

Steve looked back at the other day and let out a soft “huh,” once he realized he simply walked into the library to grab Dustin. “You know, now that I’m thinking about it, we didn't even study.”

Robin rolled her eyes.

“How am I a junior who got accidentally put in calculus and doing better than you?”

Steve opened his mouth to come back with a snarky remark but was saved by the bell.

“Whatever, I'll talk to Ms. Rodriguez after class. I'm sure she'll find me a tutor.”

“Y/n, cmon please!” Chrissy begged while holding your hand. You chuckled, shaking your head as you grabbed your calculus book, shutting your locker once you had it.

“Chrissy I'm flattered, really, but there's no way I'm joining the cheer squad.”

Chrissy followed you as you made your way toward your next class.

“But the uniforms are so cute!”

“To each their own!”

You understand what she was trying to do for you. You never really joined any clubs at school, not for any particular reason. You just didn't want to. I mean, who wants to stay after school and practice instead of going home and relaxing?

“Okay, what about the newsletter?” she asked with a big smile.

You shook your head violently. “I love Nancy to death, but she takes that way too seriously.”

“Cause she's passionate about it! Do you have anything you're passionate about?”

You leaned against the wall by your classroom thinking about it. Surely there was something.

“Y/n!” you heard a voice shout.

Your head shot up in the direction your name was called, a smile craving your face as you saw the familiar mop of semi-curls.

“Hey, Eddie!”

Eddie laughed and picked you up while spinning you around.

He placed you down and brought you in for a tight hug.

“Not that I don't appreciate the love, but what's going on?”

“I finally got an A on Mr. David’s paper and it's all thanks to you!”

You felt a blush rise to your cheeks at the small praise from the boy in front of you. You waved your hand around as you looked down at your feet.

“No, it wasn't me Eddie, I just showed you how to study in your own way! Sometimes sitting in front of books and reading isn't for everyone,” you said with a smile.

“Yeah, well because of you I’ll be able to finally get the hell out of here! Seriously y/n you're a genius!” he shouted at you while pointing and walking in the opposite direction.

Chrissy giggled. “He's such a weird kid. Not a bad weird though.”

You nodded your head. “He's a sweetheart though, I'll see you after tryouts?” you asked her, finally beginning to walk into class.

She nodded her head with a bright smile on her face. “See you after tryouts!”

You smiled and took your usual seat at your desk, you glanced at the board and opened your textbook to the page that was on the board getting ready to read about today’s lesson.

“Y/n, could you come up here, please?” you heard Ms. Rodriguez call. You make your way over to her desk with confusion on your face.

“Is everything okay?”

“Of course sweetheart! How would you feel about some extra credit?”

You perked up at the mention of it causing Ms. Rodriguez to laugh.

“I have a student who needs tutoring and I figured why not send in my best student.”

“Ms. Rodriguez I just passed your last test, if I'm your best student that's a little sad.”

“You helped Munson get a B on his quiz.”

Your eyes went wide and you smiled. “Did I really?”

She nodded her head and smiled at you. “I don't mean to be rude but you brought him from a D to a B, it's progress.”

You stood there and thought about it. The teachers underestimated Eddie. He was smart, he just didn't have the proper tools to kick-start his mind. What if this kid isn't smart? What if you can never teach then they fail? That means that you've failed.

“Look, you don't have to say yes,” Ms. Rodriguez started. “But if you decide to go he said he'd meet you in the library after school…assuming he knows where that is.”

You nodded your head. “I'll tutor him, I'm sure it won't be that hard.”

It's been an hour. An hour of you sitting in the school library when you could be at home taking a nap. Chrissy stopped by earlier jumping for joy when she told you she made the cheer squad. You smiled and congratulated her knowing she was ecstatic to be on the team. She left shortly saying she needed to meet the coaches for her uniform, ever since then you've been alone.

You let out a frustrated sigh gathering your things while cursing under your breath. At least you finished some homework, now you can go home and just relax. Your thoughts are cut off when someone bursts into the library panting trying to catch their breath. Shushes are thrown at him causing him to scoff.

“Oh relax. Geez, a guy can't even breathe nowadays.” His eyes scanned the library lighting when they land on you.

Oh no, you think. Please, please for the love god tell me I don't have to tutor Steve Harrington.

“Hey y/n! Ms. Rodriguez said you'd tutor me.”

Send the flood. Send it now.

“You’re late Harrington.”

“I know, but hear me out!”

You took a seat gesturing for him to go on.

“Oh, I didn't think you were actually gonna hear me out.”

“Steve, I'll leave.”

“Right, sorry, I would've been here but I needed to pick up the kids from school.”

Kids? “You have kids?”

“God no! I mean, not yet. I'll have little nuggets of my own someday, but I babysit…I guess.”

Your eyes light up as you remember seeing him with a group of kids from time to time. “Oh yeah! Nance’s brother and his friends, right?”

He smiled and sat down next to you nodding his head.

“Yup, they're demons.” He rubbed his hands together and put his backpack on the table. “So when do we start?”

“We started an hour ago Steve. Look, seriously if you want me to be your tutor please come on time.”

Steve nodded and made an X over his heart. “Cross my heart, and hope to die, babe.”

You bit your bottom lip, shaking your head trying to fight off the heat that made way to your cheeks.

“So um, Rodriguez gave me your quiz.”

“Ah, so you've seen my handy work,” he said while leaning back in the chair, his arms thrown behind his head.

“If that's what you want to call it.” you smiled.

Steve swears he felt his heart beat out of his chest when you smiled at him. How has he never noticed how pretty you are? He's seen you around the school before, he knows your friends with Robin. How come you guys haven't crossed paths before?

“You see how you have X=8? It actually equals 20. You have to carry the five here and subtract three from- Steve are you listening?”

“You're really pretty.” he blurred out.

Great, you thought. Now I'm flustered. “Oh, um, thank you, but we should really get back to studying-”

“We should go out sometime.”

You ignore his comment and look through his test making mental notes. “Do you remember anything from algebra?” you asked while glancing at him.

“What?”

You put your head in your hands and let out a sigh. “We're gonna need more than books to help you.”

“No, Robin! I need you to put in a good word for me!”

Robin closed her locker and looked at him. “Steve, you're literally a chick magnet. Why do you need my help?”

Steve hopped into the driver's seat with disappointment written on his face. He was supposed to meet you to study after school today but you canceled.

“She's not just a chick robin. There's something about her I just can't shake off.”

“Gross, you've been watching rom-coms too much.”

Steve sighed and saw you walking out of the building with a smile on his face. He's been studying with you for about two weeks now and he's been anxiously waiting to get his test back from Ms. Rodriguez. He's been studying the flash cards you made him paying more attention to your handwriting than the material written on the cards.

“Should I talk to her?” Steve asked while looking over at robin who was too busy applying mascara to her lashes.

“Uh-huh, totally.”

Steve rolled his eyes, stepping out of the car and jogging over to you.

“Y/n! Hey!” he said with a smile on his face.

“Hey, Steve, any news back about your test?”

He stuffs his hands in the pockets of his jacket nervously swaying back and forth on the heels of his feet.

“Nah not yet, by the way, you look stunning today,” he said with a smile. You roll your eyes as he grabs your hand lifting it up in the air.

“cmon, do a little spin for me”

Ever since that first day of studying with you, he's been persistent in getting you to fall for him. He'll bring you little gifts or doodles he does in class when he's bored even though you scold him for not paying attention. He's even brought in his friends to back him up.

“You know Steve is a nice guy,” Mike said. “My sister loved going out with- oof.”

Dustin cut him off with a punch to the arm. “Dude, maybe don't mention the fact that Nancy went out with him.”

Mike made a confused noise. “But she's happy with Jonathan now. What's the harm?”

You reluctantly do the spin pushing him away when he lets out a whistle.

“You're so stupid,” you said walking away from him.

“Stupid for you. When are you gonna let me take you out on a date? Dustin vouched that I'm a hopeless romantic.”

You opened your mouth to say something but got cut off by someone shouting your name.

“Yo! Y/n!”

“Oh hey, Robert, ready to study?”

Steve felt his heart drop. You're studying with other people? But that's your guys’ thing.

“Yeah, coach will have my head if I don't get my history grade up.”

Did you cancel your study date with Steve to study with someone else?

“I'm sure he will superstar, I'll meet you in the library in a bit.”

Robert nodded his head and walked away to the library. You looked at Steve and noticed his mood went down.

“Hey, everything okay?”

“You're studying with Robert?”

“Yeah, his coach practically begged me to tutor him so he can play in Friday's game.”

Steve understood you are free to study with other people. Free to study with other guys. So why was he so jealous?

“Oh, okay cool.”

You held back a giggle as you pushed him back slightly. “Jealous Harrington?”

“A little.”

You swear you always know what he's about to say, yet he always catches you off guard.

You ruffle his hair and make your way to the library throwing a glance at him over your shoulder.

“Don't worry Harrington, there's no guy like you.”

Steve watched you walk away with rosy cheeks and a smile as he walked back to his car humming a random tune.

“Robin.”

“I saw that whole thing you are head over heels for her. I'll put a word in for you.”

“No need, apparently there's no guy like me.”

Steve was pushing past students shouting out the occasional “excuse me!” and “get out of my way.” he bursts into the library, his eyes scanning the room before he sees you're nose deep in a book, walkman headphones over your ears.

He sprints over to you and slams his body down in the chair across from you.

You jump and glare at him, moving your headphones down around your neck. “Jesus Steve, how about you warn a girl before you ambush her?”

Steve said nothing as he placed the test in front of you with the biggest smile you've ever seen. You gasped and grabbed the test bringing it closer to you, letting out a squeal when you see a green 85% written at the top of his test. You throw half of your body across the table wrapping him in a hug.

“I told you you could do it, Stevie!”

Steve thought he died right then and there and was greeted by an angel who looked a little too much like you.

You sit back in your seat and give him a bittersweet smile. “This is the end of an era Steve, you're all good now.”

You've never seen a smile leave his face so fast. “What? What do you mean?”

You looked at your watch and started putting some of your books away in your bag.

“You passed the test Steve, that's why Rodriguez asked me to tutor you.”

“But what about my next test?”

You let out a giggle and threw your bag over your shoulder.

“This is the basics, if you understood this then you're set for the rest of the year.”

Steve’s jaw dropped as he looked at you in shock. You set him up! You made him fall in love with you and your beautiful brain only to abandon him before he could make the move!

“But what if I fail again?! What happens then?”

“Steve, you're not gonna fail! I believe in you, you got this!” you encouraged him while standing up. “Now if you'll excuse me, I have to pass on my smarts to another jock.”

Steve watched you walk away with a frown on his face. He stormed into the hand room whispering for robin to meet him by his car after practice.

“Hey, y/n told me about you passing! Congrats dingus, maybe you aren't a dingus after all.”

“I need to fail my next assignment.”

Robin sighed and pinched the bridge of her most. “I stand corrected. Okay, what's up?”

Steve opened the car door for her and ran around to his side once robin saluted him and sat in the passenger seat. He started his car and started the drive to Robin’s house.

“She said it's the end of an era! What's that even mean?”

“She meant studying Steve. She considers you a friend now, so you can hang out with her without the textbooks and stress!”

Robin did make a fair point. He could finally flirt with you without you getting onto him about staying focused. It’d just be you two, no books, no kids from your class asking you questions about the notes you took, and no more stupid calculus work. For some unknown reason, all of that terrified Steve. When you guys were studying everything came naturally to Steve, he thinks, no, he knows the minute he hangs out with you outside of study hours he's going to embarrass himself. Steve shook his head and looked over at robin.

“Our study dates are better, I'll just fail tomorrow's assignment, and boom. I'm back in.”

You arrived early to school knowing you had to help Eddie cram for his English test in first period. You grabbed a couple of notebooks for your classes today and slammed your locker shouting when you saw robin behind it.

“Jesus Christ! What is up with you and Steve sneaking up on me?!”

Robin put both hands on your shoulders and shook you gently.

“Please talk to him!” she shouted, her voice bouncing off the walls of the nearly empty hallway. “He plans on failing all of today’s assignments just so he can keep studying with you!”

“Robin, please stop shaking me. Many people love this brain.”

She stopped shaking you but her grip on your shoulders stayed tight.

“I love you y/n, I really do. You're one of my best friends!”

“Awe, Robi-”

“But I swear to god if I have to hear about how your eyes sparkle every time Steve gets a question right, or about how badly he has to fight the urge to tuck your hair behind your ear when it falls in your face while reading I will poke pencils in my ears!”

Heat rushed to your cheeks at everything robin was saying. Did Steve really feel like that? You know he likes to flirt with you here and there but you thought that was him just being charismatic. Robin rolled her eyes when she sees that you were blushing.

“God, you're just as bad as him.”

“Okay so, what Shakespeare is trying to say is-”

“Hey rob, beat it. Gotta discuss something with my girl.” Steve said pulling a chair next to you and slinging his arm around you.

You rolled your eyes and looked over at him. “Steve I'm in the middle of helping Robert write a report-”

“No, no, he's fine. I think I'm gonna have a brain aneurysm if I read anymore.” Robert said while gathering his things.

You opened your mouth ready to ask Steve what was going on but he held a piece of paper up.

“An F?! Stevie, what happened? You were doing so good?” you gasped out grabbing the calculus homework out of his hands.

Steve shrugged his shoulders and sighed. “I guess I need more tutoring, gosh sometimes my memory is so bad I forget things like that!” he said with the snap of his fingers.

You tuned him out as you squinted at the paper, something was off, this wasn't Steve's handwriting.

“Steve?”

“Yes, darling?”

You blushed but chose to ignore his comment. “Your handwriting looks a lot like this one kid I tutored.”

“Duh, it's me. I'm the kid you tutored.”

You shook your head letting out a hum. “Your handwriting is neat. This looks like chicken scratch.”

Steve let out an awkward chuckle and cleared his throat. “Okay fine, I borrowed-”

“Borrowed?”

“I stole Jerry’s homework and pretended it was mine so that way I can keep studying with you.”

“Steve! You can hang out with me outside of studying!”

“I know I can! It's just easier with the books all around me cause I feel like you're not 100% focused on me! I know the second I have all your attention on me in gonna embarrass myself and you'll never want to date me.”

you giggle and give Steve the paper.

“I'll tell you what, next assignment you get an A on we'll go out on a date.”

Steve smiled. “You mean it?”

“Cross my heart and hope to die, babe.”

Steve shot out of his seat and kissed you on your cheek running out of the library.

“I won't let you down babe!”

A group of students shushed him and he shushed them back aggressively. “Geez, talk about a tough crowd.”

The next day you opened up your locker picking up a piece of paper that fell out. You unfolded it smiling as you saw the A+ written at the top of his paper right next to his name. Steve snuck up behind you giving your cheek a kiss, smiling at his good grade.

“Now, if I'm not mistaken, I believe you owe me a date.”

#this took me forever to write #it didn't help that half of this was me on an edible #i'm just crazay like dat #don't do drugs kids #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington stranger things #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #stranger things x reader #stranger things imagine

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stuckonstarker · 1 year

Text

𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬? 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐧𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐤.

read on AO3

Peter examined his robotics homework helplessly. He stared at the fluorescent screen of his busted up laptop until his eyes felt like they were going to explode.

He liked to think he was intelligent. He prided himself on it. While he was good at robotics, biology and chemistry were his true strengths.

He kept desperately turning the problem around in his head in a valiant, though fruitless, effort to come to any solution. He huffed.

Pulling out his cracked phone, Peter took a hasty picture of the problem and sent it to Ned. He typed in Ned’s number from memory, his old phone having been obliterated in a fight gone awry with a man cosplaying as a rhino - for whatever reason.

Peter, tired out of his wits and ready to just go to bed already, didn’t bother checking if the number he sent it to was actually Ned’s. He sent the photo. It was accompanied by several text messages.

peter: do u have any idea how to solve this? peter: sry for bothering u peter: im at a total loss lmao help me pls

Tony’s phone dinged. He didn’t even look up from the project he was working on.

Then the phone dinged rapidly two more times. Tony groaned. He glared at the phone like it had any say in the matter.

The messages Tony had received were from an unknown number. He was gearing up to block the rando before looking at what the messages actually said.

There was a photo of what was clearly homework. It wasn’t particularly complex, but Tony could see how it could trip someone up. Especially when it was the dead of night. And if the area code of the number was anything to go by, whoever this mystery number was, it was also going on three in the morning for them as well.

Tony responded by solving the problem. He sent a photo.

Tony: You’re welcome. No need to thank me. Actually, do thank me.

Peter perked up at the response. It wasn’t like Ned to be up so late. In fact, Ned had gotten on his case several times about his “deranged” sleeping habits.

Peter looked at his phone and cheered. He responded.

peter: thank you thank you thank you !!!! peter: ned u r a life saver u r back in my will

He finished up his homework when he got another message. He read it and his face went hot while his body went cold.

Unknown Number: Not Ned. No need to put me in your will, unless you have something really cool besides highschool homework.

Peter typed.

peter: if u arent ned then who r u mystery man????

Unknown Number: Not important.

peter: its very important!!!!!! peter: how did u know the answer hm?????

Unknown Number: No offense, kid, but that problem was rudimentary.

peter: oooo rudimentary peter: ill rudimentary ur face bro peter: cut me some slack its like 3 am

Unknown Number: Then go to bed.

peter: ur not my dad smhhhhh

Unknown Number: I don’t need to be your dad to know it’s past your bedtime. Go to bed.

peter: lmao no

Unknown Number: Is this how you always treat people who do your homework for you?

peter: u solved one ( 1) problem peter: dont get cocky

Unknown Number: Arrogance is the one thing I’m good at.

peter: that and robotics apparently peter: u must be old peter: no one msgs like that lmao peter: ur texting not writing a novel

Unknown Number: I am old.

peter: how old

Unknown Number: Old.

peter: ha ha peter: im not actually laughing that was sarcastic

Unknown Number: I gathered that.

peter: tell me ur name at least peter: pls peter: so i can thank u

Peter stared at his phone hard. The light of it illuminating him and the pitch blackness that surrounded him.

He watched as the text bubbles appeared and disappeared over and over again. They stopped before a message popped up.

Unknown Number: Tell me yours first.

This guy, Peter thought. For some reason, probably his inane curiosity, Peter wanted to know more about this stranger. So, he complied. Nothing bad could come from sharing just his first name, right? There are like a million Peters in the world.

peter: peter peter: now u

Unknown Number: You can call me Tony.

peter: thank u tony

tony: You’re welcome.

The conversation seemed to have come to a close. Peter set his phone down, resolute on getting at least three hours of sleep. Then, another message popped up.

tony: Feel free to contact me with any more robotics problems you come across.

“Ned,” Peter said, successfully capturing his friend’s attention despite the onslaught of dodgeballs being pummeled at them.

“What?” Ned gave his friend a bright look, “Is this about spider activities?”

Peter said, “No. And I thought we made a rule about not talking about the spider here.”

“I was being discreet,” Ned said.

Peter shook his head, “Whatever. That is so not the point. Anyways, last night I was having some serious problems with Mr. Volpenhein’s homework and I texted you because I needed help, but I didn’t text you. I accidentally texted some random guy and he solved the problem. Then he tried to tell me to go to bed.”

“Did he get the answer right?” Ned asked.

Peter said, “I think so.”

“No offense, Peter, but that isn’t that exciting.”

Peter shrugged his shoulders.

Ned laughed, “Even some strange guy was trying to put you to bed.”

“Whatever,” Peter said with a smile.

Peter, adrenaline spiking in a matter of seconds, jumped in front of Ned. In the process, he caught the ball that had been hurled at his friend. He gave a harsh glare to the perpetrator in question who was, as always, Flash.

Flash’s eyes were wide, but he dug his heels into the ground. “You just got lucky, Penis! Next time I won’t miss,” He called out.

Peter rolled his eyes.

“Thanks, man,” Ned said.

Peter sighed, “No worries. The sooner we’re out of here, the better.”

Ned nodded.

They had lunch right after gym. In Peter’s opinion, besides in the morning, this was the worst time to have gym. But that was just the typical Parker Luck, as him and May have dubbed it.

“Tell me more about your robotic savior,” Ned said as they sat in their usual spots by the window.

Peter gave him a look, “I thought you said it wasn’t exciting.”

“It’s not.”

Peter pushed Ned lightly, Ned barely even moved. They both shared a small laugh.

“But,” Ned said, “but… I want to know who this guy is. I don’t want you replacing me as your Guy-In-The-Chair.”

Peter laughed, “No one could replace you. Except for maybe MJ. But she’d never want to replace you, so that’s sorted.”

Ned said, “Do you think this mystery guy is a villain?”

“No,” Peter said, “usually bad guys kick me around a bunch. So far, none of them have offered to help me with my homework.”

Ned made a contemplative noise, “You never know.”

“I think I have a pretty good guess, though,” Peter said.

“But you still never know.”

“Since when did you have trust issues?” Peter asked with a smile. He said, “Being weirdly detached and mistrusting is MJ’s thing.”

Ned said, “I’m only looking out for you. I don’t want what happened with Dr. O-”

“Ned.”

Ned gave Peter a soft look, “Sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Peter said, attempting to, and failing at, sounding like it was fine. It was very much not fine. But that didn’t mean he wanted to talk about it.

He said, “This guy’s name is Tony, by the way.”

“Whoa.” Ned asked, “Like Stark?”

Peter shook his head, “Out of the millions of people I could’ve accidentally texted, the odds of me texting Tony Stark is extremely low. Even if I did text him, he probably wouldn’t have answered.”

“But…” Ned said with a wry smile, “You never know.”

“Ned.”

Ned smiled, “Yeah?”

“Shut up,” Peter said as they both busted out into laughter.

Tony walked through a long sanitized hallway. Pepper was in front of him, luring him to his despise. Or, otherwise known as, a meeting with a bunch of stuffy halfwits.

The boardroom was just as sickeningly perfect as the hallway had been. Several men, who looked like clones of each other, sat around a table. Their eyes shot toward Tony the moment he entered the room.

Truly the only way Tony had been able to tell the difference between these men was at what stage of balding they were at. Michael Krasinski had a full head of hair while Byron Moss had none. Everyone else fell at different spots in the middle to Tony.

He sighed, “If I’m honest, which I’m rarely not nowadays, I don’t understand the purpose of this meeting.”

“What Tony means to say is,” Pepper started, swooping in to save his ass as she often did, “Stark Industries has been very successful lately. This meeting is unexpected.”

One of the members, whose hair was barely hanging on, piped up, “There have been a few investments that concerned us.”

“Pep,” Tony whispered, “if they bring up the student internships again I will freak out.”

The student internship situation had been controversial when Tony first did it. Apparently, no one cares about nurturing bright young minds. It had been a “waste of money” to encourage students to enter the STEM workfield.

Tony had assured them he would take care of it. Then he didn’t change shit. So they were probably pissed about that.

“We are eager to hear your concerns and make improvements where necessary,” Pepper said to the group of scrutinizing eyes.

Tony immediately zoned out. He discreetly pulled out his phone and sent a message to Rhodey.

Tony: When are you going to get back, Platypus? I miss you.

A response came immediately.

Peter: i didnt know we were using nicknames now Peter: what do i call u

Tony restrained saying an expletive. He had texted the highschooler from last night.

Tony: I didn’t mean to text you. That should be obvious. And you do not get to call me a nickname. We’re not there yet.

Peter: oooo how the turn tables turn Peter: who is this platypus Peter: are they like perry?

Tony: Who’s Perry?

Peter: ur joking Peter: theres no way you actually dont know who perry the platypus is

Tony: I don’t.

A picture came through of a blue animal that could be perceived as a platypus if looked at through squinted eyes.

I have never seen that creature before in my life, Tony sent with a smile.

Peter: omg u have to watch phineas and ferb

Tony: I don’t have to do anything, actually.

Peter: wow ur sooooo cool tony Peter: only losers havent seen phineas and ferb

Tony: It’s a cartoon.

Peter: so???

Tony: So, you’re calling me a loser for not watching a children’s show?

Peter: ye

Tony: You know what, kid. I respect that.

Then, Tony considered for a moment.

Tony: Wait. Tony: Shouldn’t you be in school?

Peter: i am

Tony: Why are you texting me?

Peter: cos im bored lol Peter: i already know all the material so it doesnt matter

Tony: You didn’t seem to know all the material last night. If I recall, you were having problems with a pretty basic circuit.

Peter: it was THREE IN THE MORNING

Tony: Don’t yell at me.

Peter: wat r u going to do?? Peter: ground me?? Peter: love to see u try mister

Tony: Keep it up and I will.

Peter: ooo im sooo scared

Tony: Pay attention to your teacher.

Peter: i just told u i already know this stuff Peter: its chem and im hella good at that

Tony: Where do you go to school?

Tony only realized how creepy of a question that was after he sent it.

Peter: none of your business high

Tony: My bad. Overstepped a boundary there.

Peter: apology accepted

Tony: I wasn’t apologizing.

Peter: bruh Peter: then what were u doing???

Tony: Taking accountability.

Peter: im pretty sure thats the textbook definition of apologizing

Tony let out a soft laugh and everyone in the meeting looked at him.

“Is there anything you’d like to add?” asked some guy who was rapidly approaching the bald end of the spectrum.

Tony smiled, “Nope.”

“Mr. Stark is only amused because these reports show that the student internship program has been a wild success,” Pepper said with the swiftness of someone who was used to Tony’s antics.

Another board member interjected, “Just because something’s a success doesn’t mean we should continue it.”

“Are you being serious?” Tony asked before Pepper could form a prim response.

Pepper sighed, “There is no reason to discontinue the program. Until someone in this room provides clear statistical proof that the student internship program is not worth continuing then it will continue running. Along with every other civil program Stark Industries is running.”

“Tell em, Pep,” Tony said.

Pepper gave him a look with her icy eyes. Tony smiled in turn.

Leaving the board meeting was an instant breath of fresh air. Even if Pepper instantly got on his case. To be fair, he deserved it.

“You weren’t even paying attention,” Pepper said.

Tony tilted his head, “I am taking that accusation very heavily, Potts. You’ll be in contact with my lawyer.”

“I’d have to be the one to call them,” Pepper said.

Tony smiled at her apologetically.

Pepper asked, “Who were you texting?”

“I wasn’t texting.”

Pepper gave him a blank look, “I’m not blind.”

“You know,” Tony admitted, “I’m not really sure. Some kid texted the wrong number to ask for help with homework. It was a circuit problem, the kind they give you in highschool. So I helped out. I accidentally texted them just now because I was trying to text Rhodey.”

Pepper looked at him hard. It was the same exasperated calculating stare Tony had seen a million times over.

“Jesus,” She said after a moment, “you’re like a walking PR nightmare.”

Tony shrugged his shoulders in defeat. She had a pretty good point. But he wasn’t too concerned. Afterall, the kid didn’t know who he was, and Tony didn’t know who the kid was.

Their most recent conversation would probably be their last conversation.

“Dude,” Peter squeezed through the after school hallway congestion.

Ned stood at his locker and gave Peter a toothy smile, “Hi.”

“Guess what just happened,” Peter said.

Ned said, “What?”

“Dude, guess!” Peter shook Ned’s shoulder.

Ned rolled his eyes but complied with a smile, “The roof caved in on Mrs. Little and her class is canceled for the rest of the year?”

“Not even close, dude. And don’t say stuff like that. I like Mrs. Little.”

Ned laughed and closed his locker. They walked down the steadily emptying hall together.

“What happened, then?” Ned asked, “Is it something to do with spider related activities?”

Peter sighed as he looked to the ceiling for dramatic effect, “No! Tony texted me.”

“Whoa,” Ned halted in his tracks, “why?”

Peter said, “He was trying to text someone he calls ‘Platypus.’ Then he threatened to ground me for texting while in class. But I think he was mostly joking. Maybe. It’s hard to tell through text. And he texts like an old man.”

“He probably is an old man.” Ned said, “He probably lied about trying to text someone else just to talk to you. You’re probably the first person he’s talked to in fifty years.”

“Ned, that is so not nice,” Peter said.

Ned said, “I’m just throwing theories out there.”

“Well, settle it down, MatPat, okay? I think it’s probably some old guy who - I don’t know - worked in mechanical engineering or something. He’s probably some regular old dude,” Peter said.

Ned said, “Like I said, it’s just a theory-”

“Don’t,” Peter warned.

“-a game theory!”

“I don’t even know why I’m friends with you,” Peter smiled.

Ned sang, “It’s because you love me.”

“True,” Peter said.

They went their separate ways.

Peter usually walked home. When he was feeling spicy, he’d swing back to his apartment. But, especially as Spider-Man became more well known, Peter didn’t want to do something that risked giving his identity away.

He texted Tony.

peter: my friend thinks ur a sad old man texting me for company

A response, immediately.

tony: Your friend isn’t entirely wrong.

peter: thats concerning peter: do u have irl friends???

tony: Yes.

peter: thank god peter: i was about to be real sad

tony: Don’t worry about me, kid.

peter: i cant help it peter: u helped me wit my hw peter: now i owe u my life

tony: Any time, kid.

peter: whats with u calling me kid peter: how would u like it if i kept calling u old man

tony: I’ve been called worse.

peter: like what???? peter: i’ll fight them for u, old man

tony: Don’t. I deserved it most of the time.

peter: why?

tony: I wasn’t a good person when I was younger. I’m still fixing the mess I made in my early twenties.

peter: ppl r not their worst mistakes peter: u r so much more than what u have done wrong

tony: That’s surprisingly profound coming from someone who can’t be bothered to type out ‘you’.

peter: thank you

tony: Do you just like being difficult?

peter: yes peter: its part of my charm

The kid, Peter, wasn’t wrong. His aptitude for sarcasm and talking back was actually growing on Tony.

There was something about the anonymity that made it easy for Tony to spill the feelings he kept from some of his closest confidants. Tony knew it was obvious, though. Rhodey, Pepper, and Happy - hell, maybe even a portion of the Avengers - knew that guilt ate away at him everyday. But, he never said it. Except for the times where he wanted to make a point.

Tony found his thoughts coming back to Peter at hand. Then he stopped himself. There was no way that wherever this thing was going that it was going to be good.

But he found himself intrigued. And an intrigued Tony Stark might be the most dangerous Tony Stark there is.

The day passed by, but Tony’s thoughts were consistently drawn back toward Peter.

He ignored the gnawing for Peter’s sake. The last thing some random highschool kid needed was to be dragged into Tony’s neverending drama. But…

Tony: How was school?

A reply in an instant.

Peter: wow Peter: dad moment Peter: it was alright Peter: like i said the work is easy since i already know most of it Peter: just boring

Tony: I get what you mean. I skipped highschool and went straight to college.

Peter: no way Peter: ur fucking with me

Tony: Nope. It was horrible for my mental health.

Peter: how smart r u Peter: jesus Peter: i wouldnt survive one day in a college class

Tony: They’re not that hard. Surprisingly enough. Tony: It was just lonely being a child surrounded by adults.

Peter: sry to hear that Peter: did u want to go to college early?

Tony: No. But I didn’t really have much of a choice in the matter.

Peter: thats awful Peter: u shouldnt have been forced into it

Tony: Don’t worry about it, kid. Seriously. Tony: I shouldn’t even be talking to you about this. It’s not like you’re my therapist.

Peter: do u have a therapist???

Tony: Yeah, but I don’t really go.

Peter: why

Tony: Too busy.

Peter: mental health is important Peter: go to ur therapy or i wont go to robotics class

Tony: You drive a tough bargain.

Peter: go to therapy or i will go feral

Tony: Now that’s a threat. Fine, kid, you win.

Peter: thank u

It was later that night, Tony found himself dangerously enamored. Though, Peter was an anonymous face behind a phone screen, Tony had really found himself coming to like that kid. It scared him to death, liking people. The people he liked tended to meet untimely ends. Tony didn’t do well with liking people.

His love bordered on obsession. More than most. Pepper, Rhodey, even Happy had all been at his lovebombing mercy before and none of them had been particularly fond of it. Tony knew if he were to do anything for this kid, Peter, then there would be no going back from it. That it would completely undo this weirdly beautiful thing they had going on.

Call Tony selfish, it wouldn’t be the first time, but he liked having someone to talk to who didn’t know him. Who didn’t put enormous expectations on him all the time. Someone like Peter, who seemed young and free, started to make Tony’s wings spread a little as well.

Can’t stop thinking about you, Tony sent, cringing when he realized how much of a creep that made him sound.

Peter: ur so sweet Peter: i bet u say that to everyone who accidentally texts u

Tony: Nope, just you.

Peter: what an honor

Tony’s curiosity got the better of him. Peter, it seemed, was a highschool student. Their conversations have illuminated Tony to the fact that, yeah, Peter is actually a genius. Tony doesn’t know much more than that. A friend named Ned, but no parents, and somewhat disadvantaged.

Tony could work with that. He commanded Friday to trace a phone he felt a familiar feeling. The kind of chilling stomach ache that warned him he was making an irreversible mistake.

“Found him, Boss,” Friday announced, multiple pictures appearing before Tony in an instant.

The blue light blinded him for a moment. He approached it. A small apartment in Queens. Tony smiled.

Friday said, “There’s something else of note.”

“Yeah, babygirl?”

“The local vigilante known as Spider-Man,” a few videos and pictures appear, “has been seen coming and going from this location. There is reason to suspect that Peter Parker may be Spider-Man.”

Tony stepped back. He examined all the data for a fault, but nope. It seemed concrete. The kid who texted him by accident, a one-in-a-million chance, just so happened to also be the web-slinging vigilante known as Spider-Man.

Things just got much more interesting.

Peter was cleaning some dishes while May took a nap on the couch. His mind wandered back to the night’s text he received from Tony. Was Tony hitting on him? It seemed silly, but it wasn’t entirely implausible. Was it?

He told Ned about it and Ned gave him a side-eye while MJ snickered. It doesn’t matter what they think, Peter thought, okay, it kind of does. But they don’t understand what it’s like juggling being a good nephew, a good student, and a good Spider-Man. There’s a lot of responsibility Peter has been shouldering and this Tony guy feels like a breath of fresh air. He doesn’t know who Peter is, nephew, student, or Spider-Man. It’s nice talking to someone who doesn’t have any expectations for him.

There was a sharp knock on the door.

Peter turned toward it as May was roused from her sleep. She started to get up.

“I’ve got it, May.”

Her hair was a mess and her eyes narrowed in the freshly awake kind of way. She mumbled something as she sat up despite Peter’s protests.

Peter sighed and he opened the door. He looked up and opened his mouth, but the words died on his lips-

Oh, shit.

#starker #max writes #yo #here u go

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nymphdiariesdotcom · 1 year

Text

15 oc questions!✿

tagged by: @coloursul - love you friend! :D

It’s Damien [L] and Roman [R] time! ( •̀ .̫ •́ )✧

1) Are you named after anyone?

Damien: “It’s a funny thing to mention, actually. I was supposed to be named after my uncle, Dominik but he went to jail and was convicted of a first degree felony that put him away for a while. Yeah, I’m sure you probably can tell my ma didn’t want me mixed up in that.”

Roman: “I wouldn’t know. I’d ask my moms but she dead.”

2) When was the last time you cried?

Damien: “I don’t think feel comfortable answering that.” [he cried yesterday when he saw a lizard with its tail cut off maliciously]

Roman: “[long solemn silence]...Don’t ask that again.” [he’s going through.. a lot. mind his manners]

3) Do you have kids?

Damien: “Unfortunately, no.”

Roman: “No. I’d like to keep it that way.”

4) Do you use sarcasm?

Damien: “No. That’s not polite. [frowns] ”

Roman: “What do you think?”

5) What's the first thing you notice about people?

Damien: “Their voice. It’s a very distinguishable thing and we’re social creatures, y’know?”

Roman: “A fat ass. OH, you meant people in general? Lmao”

6) What’s your eye colour?

Damien: “[scratches head] Uh, hazel, I think? No idea. It ain’t nothin’ captivating.”

Roman: “Light brownish-hazel. [raised brow] What you want? Tryna fuck me?” [good lord]

7) Scary movies or happy endings?

Damien: “Happy endings. We all could use some light in our lives. No shame in it.”

Roman: “I’d say scary movies if I really gave a shit. I just go with what my sneaky link wants so we can do freaky shit later.”

8) Any special talents?

Damien: “Ain’t gonna front and say it’s sumn special, but I can detect who’s coming downstairs just by their footstep pattern.” #EthnicChildChronicles

Roman: “Come find out at my house.”

9) Where were you born?

Damien: “New Jersey.”

Roman: “ATL.”

10) What are your hobbies?

Damien: “Shit.. partying count? [laughs] I’m playin’, I’m playin’.. probably cooking or cleaning ‘round the house? Spent my time as a lil’ kid shadowing my ma, so there’s that.”

Roman: “Milf hunting. Hide yo’ moms, I might fuck her next.”

11) Have you any pets?

Damien: “Nope! Might get me a husky though.”

Roman: “No. Sugar gliders cute as hell, though.”

12) What sports do you play / have you played?

Damien: “Was fighting for my LIFE in high school football.”

Roman: “Nothin’. I just work out from time to time, that’s wassup really.”

13) How tall are you?

Damien: “Six somethin’. I’ll ask at my next doc appointment..”

Roman: “Taller than you, probably.”

14) Favourite subject in school?

Damien: “Oh! Math. Calculus specifically. It’s stimulating and requires..- [smile fades] Wait, where are you going..? Don’t leave wha-?”

Roman: “English Language Arts. Shut up.”

15) Dream job?

Damien: “Hm.. probs a social worker? I really love kids and wanna work with families. Give single parents the love and patience they deserve.. world’s so hard on them..”

Roman: [long pause] “I’m outta here.”

[you’ve forced Roman to evaluate his current life situation. he disliked that.]

tagging: whoever wants to do this! just say i tagged u 🫵🏿 RN!!

#ask game #crsent.sims #oc #damien reyes #roman valentine #and to believe that these mfs are actually best friends LMAOOOOO #i hope roman was as obnoxious 4 u guys as possible <3

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br1ghtestlight · 7 months

Text

random thought but i love eugene mirman's gene sounds ESPECIALLY when gene is sleeping. they're so good & cute

louise tina bob and linda looking @ gene literally exactly like this when he forgets how his song goes at breakfast LMAOO

love that tina and louise seem to actually pay attention to what songs gene is writing and what they're about despite the fact that there are SO MANY. supportive family <3

gene's dream.... bro that was god speaking to you. like for real wtf

also im only a minute in and there are SO MANY good screenshots already he's such a cutie i love him so much!!!! <3 gene episodes my beloved

"Now I'm going to change into last night's pajamas, AKA my only pajamas, and brush my teeth with Tina's toothbrush because that's what I accidentally did last night."

"Wait, what?"

gene and tina are so silly?? 😭

me and gene share many similarities including waking up in the middle of the night every two hours for no fucking reason. like THATS relatable

MR AMBROSE APPEARANCE LETS FUCKING GOOO‼️‼️ why does his voice sound slightly sped up is he okay. does he have a new voice actor?? he sounds slightly off not like in a bad way its just strange

THERE WAS A NEW VOICE ACTOR BCUZ BILLY EICHNER WASNT CREDITED maybe bcuz its such a small appearance but thats very weird. i feel like mickey fans in season 12 episode 6 when loren did that horrible mickey impression 😭😭 also whoever did his voice in this episode wasnt credited so it was somebody from the main cast doing an impression of him. will try to figure out who. sorry episode review cancelled i need to figure out who the hell voiced mr ambrose in this episode

based on the fact that u cant obviously tell who it is i dont think its eugene mirman and probably not h jon benjiman?? dan mintz can only do one voice so its not him either. probably either john roberts larry murphy or a random crew member who they didnt bother to credit

(most likely billy eischner just wasn't avaliable to voice mr ambrose due to his movie career etc so i dont blame them but it was noticeable enough to ME that i needed to figure it out. not even a bad impression honestly the average fan wouldnt notice)

"What do you lucid dream about?"

"I do revenge stuff on people who were mean to me in high school, some fantasy and science fiction, some adult stuff I can't tell you about."

this is literally the gayest thing mr ambrose has ever said omg FHFMDDJKSKS i cant believe this drama club ass nerd was bullied in high school who could have guessed. not me thats for sure

(now somebody has to write a fanfic about mr ambrose having Adult Stuff dreams about mr frond. i want this on my desk by 3pm tomorrow)

love mr ambrose and his gay ass curly hair..... mr ambrose my beloved <33 kisses u

i dont have anything to say im just strangely invested in gene's lucid dreaming plot at this point. Love all his silly little dreams and its incredible he never seems to have any nightmares or anything!!

this is reminding me of the movie where gene had a dream and he was scared that he wasn't good at music and that people weren't going to like his performance and the aliens came down to told him to stop 😭😭💔 his insecurity that he might not be that good a musician literally makes me cry. he's so sweet and kindhearted my babyy boy

CAN I SKIP SCHOOL AND GO BACK TO SLEEP LMAO

"Even successful musicians went to sixth grade, Gene."

"That's a MYTH!!"

weirdly mr ambrose started sounding completely normal at some point like did his voice actor come back and just wasn't credited?? or whoever did this impression was REALLY good jfc

mr ambrose HATES these fuckign kids bro

HES SO UNHINGED LMAO 😭😭

NOT THE STARING AGAIN. why are they literally just this image every single time gene plays music in this episode im gonna cry

love this specific frame of gene running his hand through his hair

awww bob is such a good dad

sidenote but this subplot with tina and louise is so stupid it actually made me laugh LMAO the fucking girl cricket. thr female cricket. like what if he's gay huh what then

"or if she's not his type she also makes a great best friend. she's a good listener" THANK YOU louise for acknowledging the cricket might be gay. she's an ally 🙏

AWW GENE WRITING HIS SONG <3 eugene mirman isnt a Good singer (not hating he literally says that all the time. they have to record each line seperately bcuz he cant sing on key) so its hard to tell when they're trying to make gene's songs seem good or not but this is really sweet. u can tell he just loves music so much

why is gene's song kinda making me emotional..... like this show is usually 50/50 on if it actually wants to take gene's songwriting ability seriously but in this episode its so clear how much he LOVES music and songwriting and how talented he is at it. he has trouble with focus and commitment sometimes but thats never an issue when it comes to his music and he'd happily spend an entire afternoon writing a song from start to finish (even skipping out on dinner) because he was so hyperfocused. love how much respect they give gene in this episode tbh

deeply appreciate the "larry murphy as teddy" credit despite teddy not having one single line in this entire episode. Literally just a legacy credit at this point

I LOVED THIS EPISODE 😭😭💕 i dont think it'll be as widely popular as some other episodes this season but as a gene fan and an artist this episode really resonated with me. the ending sequence was actually really beautiful (gives me the same vibes as "your heart's not broken its only growing" tbh) and i loved gene's song and all the different costumes they put him in for his dreams!! tina and louise's subplot was really cute too. very enjoyable episode if you're a gene fan or just a casual viewer who wishes he got more focus. he's SO SWEET and so passionate <3

#txt #bob's burgers #episode review

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roppiepop · 2 years

Note

reverse robins au? your choice if it’s jaytim

Aaaaaa thank u for coming in and asking abt it!!!! Reverse robin aus are one of my fave fandom specific concepts!!

Okay, so basic ground here, but my main reference points for divergence are the 4 male robins, just for linerization sake, and just because I’m most familiar with Tim he’ll prolly be the one that gets the most expansion, but i hope i can do this the way i prefer it to, which is w the most consideration i can towards canon changes affected while also letting each of them mostly keep their original arcs!!!!

- To start off i think it could be interesting to have Bruce work/train duke at the start, and the possibilities of how that would affect Bruce’s attitude towards metas in Gotham, and maybe give a little flavor to how it feels being a mentor to a kid that’s still mostly independent from him with his own family. How well this will actually be handled i still dont know.

- having Damian be the first kid he actually has to try and kind of parent right in the early bat years also come with a few considerations, i think. On one hand Bruce is definitely softer, maybe a bit more tempered having mentored before, and damian may be fresh off the league but since there’s no previous robins for him to need to fight his ‘birthright’ for, maybe there isn’t a need for any drastic measures. (I mean he’s definitely gonna fight duke on principle but i want them to gain the friendship they do in canon and since duke isn’t like, Bruce’s direct partner i think that can track.)

But then again they’re still them, and damian still has a lot of hangups on worth and legacies and is in the worst stages of blustered arrogance while bruce still doesn’t know how to communicate his feelings in effective ways and happens to have an eldest child that is equally as emotionally repressed so????? Maybe its still a really rocky road.

(I’d like for Damian to keep some of his friends here, mainly Colin and Maya to start with, maybe. I honestly dont know how likely it is for him to set up a teen hero group, but i think that’ll end up happening once he sheds his robin-equivalent mantle.

We’ll let him have his nomadic self-discovery journey i guess :/// something ala williamson’s robin maybe, but like, with his actual friends xjsbdhssbdbd we can even keep Bruce and Talia’s playing tug of war w him towards their respective ideals as a catalyst, and maybe its a bit cleaner without all the baggage of morrison’s interpretation of her.

Let’s put him at idk, 17/18 at this point.)

- One thing that i think definitely changes with having Damian in the first iteration of the dynamic duo is how the mythos is perceived. The kid is capable and ruthless and for awhile at the start, mostly cared more for animals than whoever they were saving. Definitely made rogues think twice to leverage him over batman, but probably mostly didn’t endear him much towards the ppl they encounter, though I’d like to believe that changed as he did. Though the extent of that change i need to think on lmao.

For Steph I think I’ll have her start a little before Tim’s robin-equivalent, staying as spoiler, right after Damian leaves so it goes a bit before anyone notices.

Tim’s start here might be a bit tricky to speak on logistics, he starts as a nightwing character and i mostly want to keep in spirit with that, so Damian’s got to be the fixation here. There’s not really a signature flip that could reliably be imprinted in Tim’s memory but maybe it can be simpler. Like idk a kind act at a gala during Damian’s early years that made tim take notice of him, of a verbal/physical tell that one day robin-equivalent gets caught doing, idk- but now we’re officially in Tim’s stalker era.

A recap on where the rest of the vigilantes are, i think duke is rlly nice w the outsiders i kinda want him there lol Damian’s just abt to start his shounen battle arc and steph is slowlinh appearing on Bruce’s radar but as like, a minor villain.

Something something Tim tries to find Damian, can’t seem to manage to, ends up going to the manor to ask, gets halted by alfred, somehow ends up spilling everything he knows to bruce, ????? Profit -> he gets the mantle.

(A bit clunky, a but out of nowhere, sure, but considering I’m p sure that bruce called jason ‘robin’ the moment he decided to bring him home u can gleam that the man misses having a sidekick :////)

Steph’s story is intertwined with Tim’s for better or worse, and while i like her better when she’s striking out on her own i think tim trying to prove himself before official training by like, capturing her would be a serviceable segue into Bruce training them both. Or try to at least. Steph resorts to her own resources, Tim’s parents get poisoned in Haiti.

And now with Tim and Bruce- a rocky start on the vigilante side bcs well, he may have played the mentor role before but Duke’s a meta, Damian was a ready-made assassin, and Steph, although neither, was still noticeably more athletic than Tim is, its not a big deal, but his initial benchmark was already kind of screwed (would love for tim to still end up getting unplanned training from shiva, somehow.)

But bcs of circumstances that are oh so v different than the one in canon bruce has the patience to teach him firm but kindly 👍 and since Jack is still in a coma (or maybe just kill him off fr ://) they can form a proper healthy-ish bond.

Tim’s tenure in canon is prolific but also threads through the groundwork that Dick’s run paved, and i honestly dont know how well that would’ve faired without him vouching for Tim, but it could be interesting to explore how the dynamic duo’s perception changes with a robin-equivalent that places heavy emphasis on cooperation and is definitely more approachable than the last one. I would v much like to keep that aspect of tim that knows everyone lmao

Also young justice running around without the teen titans as a precedent sounds like a hilarious concept.

We’ll say Damian finds out when Jon brings up that his little bro Kon is in a team w the new-bat partner?? I didn’t know u had a new one?? So ofc Damian storms Gotham demanding an explanation.

And see, while i definitely believe that Dami would’ve grown as a character the lack of a Dick Grayson influence makes me think that maybe he still wouldn’t be above attacking a kid in righteous anger :///// and like, he’s pissed at Bruce of course, that name wasn’t his to give, but maybe it’s all the more worse just bcs of how,,, Tim Tim is. Took his name and changed it’s association, came into his house and became his father’s partner lowkey son in aspects that never came easy to him, and has the audacity to greet him with a smile????

Oh yeah Damian definitely hates Tim. Needlessly cruel abt the one definite edge he has over the kid. And like, poor tim :/// never meet ur heroes in any timeline i g.

But anyway!! Dami might move to Bludhaven, might be somewhere else or other, definitely not anywhere near Tim if he can help it. He should be there for all those big events though, although I’m not sure which ones to keep in. Maybe Tim and Steph can coordinate for No Man’s Land. Then enter Cass, who’s also gonna be in contact mostly w those two.

This is getting soooooo long but like, then Tim dies, because he has to. We’ll pull it to be a Joker Jr. situation and give everyone that good good character development. And then there’s Jason.

- The logistics for Jason becoming robin-equivalent is also real tricky, there’s definitely the factor of making bruce laugh via attempted robbery, but i think the actual nudging can be helped along by Steph, as like, a fellow crime alley kid, idk.

But well, Jason’s time in the mantle- unfortunately he yet again can’t escape the giant shoes of his predecessor, but al least now he has a full support system in the others. And so does Bruce, this time around. It’d be nice to keep that happy status quo for long.

Enter- ‘Tim wasn’t actually dead but take a guess on who wanted it to look like that so he can take him away.’ Anyways, you know the drill. Ra’s would definitely leverage his remolding of Tim against Bruce, but he wouldn’t send him back, probably. Tim’s at a low enough point to likely agree.

Maybe Tim also didn’t come out the pit right though, maybe his brains still fractured. He doesn’t come out the way ra’s wanted and although he kept trying, one day he could’ve decided to just throw tim back to gotham like a defective toy.

Should we give Tim a villain arc? It could be done, but it’ll always be rooted in duty and the belief of serving the greater good. If he does take it up it wouldn’t involve getting in trouble with the bats, or telling them hes back- unless of course, that serves a goal, but even if tim is jealous and resentful of jason getting things like damians approval and official adoption status his self-worth issues are more,,, the internalizing kind. The ‘batman needs a robin’ ethos stays true and nothing would be gained from hurting him.

A vague idea for Tim’s comeback schtick could be operating in plain sight as Drake Industry heir. Since there’s a vacuum of any oracle position he could also dabble around in that. Maybe as loose as his morals would be its still in the service of keeping batman and robin the symbols they are idk!!!!!

- All said and done we can have Dick as proper robin, coming into the house heartbroken and angry and looking for justice and like, early resonance with Damian and idk sometime after we do Batman RIP.

(But before that we get Jason’s sheila arc maybe, he’ll survive. We could potentially pull a Tim and have his friends die on him back to back to back but idk!!!! This might be getting too bloated!!!!)

On the romance side ty for letting me choose my ideal reverse robin au is probably a damitim LOL its the genuine hatred turned remorse,,,, the obsessive affection turned cold indifference,,,, the care of it all,,,,,

V easy to turn it into a jaytim too though, the lack of murder attempts probably also make it smoother snsnsnsbdbdbd good luck trying to convince baby jay that he’s in that league though lol (the annoying little brother to lovers that could be employed here is rlly cute tho,,,, regardless of anything id def want there to be crushing)

OOF OKAY THIS WAS REALLY LONG!!!!! IM SORRY!!!! I’ve always wanted to tackle this eventually but I haven’t finished my reading lists enough to confidently make timeline decisions djsnsnsns i hope this still read clearly, tysm again for coming in!!!

#roppie gets a question?#jaytim #damitim #reverse robins #long post #im in my car and cant find the read more toggle on mobile im sorry to subject everyone to this shabsbssbdb #embarrassing how much i think abt this!!!!#excuse my cherry picking in the name of linearization thx

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keepyourpantsongohan · 5 months

Text

Ayesha Liveblogs Attack on Titan S4

Heading into the next season b4 I can think too much about it

Who are any of these soldiers? What an abrupt change in narration, considering Armin has done every intro until now

“Wasn’t I just flying around with a couple of swords in my hands? And there were Titans too.” That is also what I’m wondering, Falco

“The successor to the Armoured Titan.” PARDON?? ALSO DOES REINER HAVE A BEARD NOW??? THAT’S NEW

So wait, if the loss of Bertholdt and Annie’s Titans are what caused the war, does that mean this war has been going for a year, since the battle of Shiganshina? Or has more time elapsed that I’m not aware of

“This war has dragged on for four years now.” I guess that answers my earlier question, assuming my premise was true

I must once again offer a hearty ‘Military bad’ to all of this:

“Look, Colt, you’re the chosen successor of the Beast Titan.” How do ur Titan soldiers feel exactly when u tell them u’ve chosen who’s gonna eat ‘em

"Honestly, you might never find a warrior candidate who is as talented as me.” What I would give for Gabi’s level of unwavering self-confidence

“I don’t shoot kids,” said an adult, for the first time ever in the history of this show

Honestly, the context that Reiner, Annie and Bertholdt knew about the outside world and then still chose to make things worse for the people already living in Titan Hell Island just makes them harder to understand

[Zeke yells out of a blimp] [Dozens of parachuting Titans are created mid-air] So the Beast Titan ability is just to fucking??? Yell people into Titans??? ZEKE WHAT ON EARTH

This does explain where all of those Titan ppl were coming from in Shiganshina tho

“I’m sick and tired of all these walls.” Is that why you kept destroying them, Reiner??????

As a sidenote, now that there are visibly brown people on screen: The ONLY action anime that hasn’t made me feel weird about their brown-skinned characters is Bleach; granted I haven’t watched that many shows, but the depiction in AOT is about as yikes as I expected

[ATLA voice] “Did Reiner just die?” “You know, it was really unclear.”

“My father, Grisha Jaeger, set something great and terrible in motion on that island, and as his former son, I would like to be the end of it,” said Zeke, like he had nothing to do with anything terrible happening on Paradis and as if he can renounce paternity like a belief system

So it’s not a known factor that Zeke has royal blood? Also why is royal blood so important in this show lmao like isn’t a king just whoever conquered ur country most recently

Ymir confirmed for bury ur gays (poor Historia) but when one female Titan disappears, another one must apparently reappear

Also weird that there have been a number of Titans who are women but Annie gets to hold the Female Titan title just cause her Titan got tiddies

Reiner being an older brother figure to these Other Military Kids gives me acid reflux why am I compelled to have stake in someone who has done so many wrongs

“Surpass Gabi to protect her.” You see, ACID REFLUX

Also nausea-inducing: The transparent H******** analogies!! WHY

We interrupt this griping to notice: IS THAT EREN IN MARLEY WITH THE BLINDFOLD? THAT LOOKS LIKE EREN’S HAIR

Setting other things aside, that they had to have Reiner’s uncle say “Sorry nephew,” as a way to intro the fact that Reiner and Gabi are cousins is funny, bc no one would say that, why not just have Reiner say “Uncle”????

Because they’ve yet to check in at all with what has been going on on the island, it really does feel like a whole different spin-off

Annie’s being able to summon Pure Titans confirmed as a Female Titan ability

“Well, I’m running away as fast as I can,” said Reiner’s father, summing up the attitude of almost every parental figure on this show

Mad relate to Reiner becoming reliable to fulfill a need in the team

Reiner, Annie and Bertholdt don’t look older than 12 in the flashback, why must the core force of these armies always be pubescent

What even was the point of Annie tracking Kenny? Bc he was Uncle Uri’s BF?

“His legs are saying it’ll snow today, right?” “Yeah, but his torso’s saying clear skies.” Thomas and Connie using Bertholdt’s sleep positions to predict the weather 😭😭😭😭😭 Boys ur friend is a douche

“Thing is, I don’t want this other candidate to be picked.” “Why not? Is this rival of yours a girl by chance?” It’s DEFINITELY Eren, and wow, Eren assuming the only reason u would not want ur friend to be a Titan is bc she’s a girl, quit projecting ur life onto Falco

How exactly is Eren missing a leg can he STOP himself from regenerating?

Also whose idea was it for Eren to be at exactly the place that wants to kill him the most kjghkgjh what kinda weirdass plan

“I’m doing this for you!” “He really just up and said it!” The guards being invested in Gabi and Falco’s potential tween romance

I really cannot follow the Commander and Willy’s conversations, are they going to overthrow the governments of the world orrrrrr

“My name’s Jaeger, I’m an internment zone physician.” Oh my god, Eren’s meeting his grandpa

Ah, so Eren’s crazed rambling is hereditary, I guess

“I think I know why [this woman would save me]! She must be an Easterner from Hizuru.” Dshkjdhkfjh u must be East Asian in this Marleyan society in order to acquire empathy

Perplexed by the man in the kaffiyeh holding alcohol but perhaps that’s on me for not interrogating my own preconceived notions

“I got [Reiner] to come!” announced Falco to Eren excitedly, not knowing that he was facilitating a meeting of probably the two least sane people in the world at the moment

Lmao @ the sudden content warning on episode 64, like should I be newly worried

“What do you plan to do?” “The exact same thing you did. As for why? That’s the same too.” Incredible that all it takes to threaten Reiner is ‘I’m rubber you’re glue’ (also yikes at Eren implying he’s gonna fuck-up one third of Reiner’s country)

“I feel like I’ve seen you before.” Me too Pieck, I think Shady Helmet is Annie, and I love that for her

Falco’s lesson of the day: Stranger Danger

What exactly has Eren been doing the past four years that he now views himself as a villain and Willy feels confident to label him as such in a crowd of the whole world

“If all that was to save the world, then you didn’t have much choice,” said Eren, even though Reiner definitely did, and Eren definitely does now (military bad!!!)

Eren has defeated Reiner through the power of empathy and 10 years of deep-seated psychological trauma

“If I escaped while my people died en masse, the world would not rally to our cause.” Willy Tybur really willingly offered himself and a bunch of civilians to die to both smoke out Eren and to start a world war. And Eren really went through it, knowing he would be offering the first blow in the war, and killing a bunch of people of his same heritage! A game of cat and also cat (war crime edition)

“But I’m just as sure that we’re devils ourselves.” Who’s he calling the devils? Him and Tybur? The military? Non-Eldians as a whole? Commander Magath’s vibes are constantly oscillating, what’s his deal

I’m going to guess that the War Hammer Titan is Finé, since she is the only Tybur child to get a name

Update from 6 minutes later: It’s Auntie War Hammer, actually

The parallels between Udo and Eren trying to lift something off of their loved ones who have been crushed by debris. Sickening

Is it wrong to be happy that the Scouts are finally showing up? I mean, everyone is clearly on Murder Avenue, but hey, they are the protagonists

“You’ve killed so many civilians. Innocent people. Kids.“ Not to be pedantic, Mikasa, but he did that in Stohess like five years ago with Annie, that ship has sailed

Fascinated by everyone’s new looks now that they’ve abandoned most of their morality - not loving the slicked hair and goatee for Jean but Mikasa’s hair is fun

“Are a bunch of humans... really about to come and kill me?” U can’t put people on Titan Hell Island for 100 years and expect them not to learn how to kill Titans

“Stay alive; that’s an order.” Levi's steadfast look and personality are a welcome constant

I’m like, pretty convinced Eren is going to die at some point in this season, he seems pretty down and out and Armin ain’t the narrator for nothing

Oh hey, speaking of Armin, been a while since we’ve seen you, your hair looks nice but I guess you are also Unwell™

Did Levi just detonate a bomb on Zeke’s Titan face while he was still standing on it, what kinda wild tactics

“Did I hesitate because of that kid?” We’ll call it a mild victory that we didn’t have to watch Jean murder a child in cold blood

Wow the scouts have blimps now? They’ve really seen some benefit from travelling across the sea; decades of knowledge in five years

But seriously what the fuck did Eren, Armin and Mikasa DO in the past four years that caused them to look so haunted? I get that they’re fucked up by what they’re doing NOW but it seems like a pre-existing condition

“You have a real kickable face, you know that?” Ah, it seems that Eren did not have permission to go live in a place where people wanted to eat him

“We’ve fought the New Eldian Empire’s first battle, and it ended in Victory.” Guess Titan Hell Island has decided to embrace their title as Eldians? They didn’t even know what that was five years ago jghjgh

“Honestly, I’m just glad that we made it. I know this isn’t fair to the others, but you guys will always be special, to me.” Connie treating being close friends with Sasha and Jean like it’s a betrayal to the military kjhgjkhg

“Mr. Zeke was killed right in front of us.” Oh so Zeke’s like, dead dead?

“You’re one of the good ones.” Again, I want to emphasize how much I hate everything that’s happening right now

YIKES @ Sasha being shot by a child, are they gonna kill Gabi now?

Once again I must be thankful that Jean doesn’t love murder

Whomst the heck is Yelena, I thought we would be seeing an Annie comeback?? RIP

“Quite the performance, coming from a mangy furball.” SO WE’RE WORKING WITH ZEKE NOW? THE HELL IS GOING ON

“You noticed that trend [of rescuing Eren] and used it against us. Held yourself hostage to force our hand.” Both more manipulative and shrewd than I have come to expect from Eren; growth??????

I suppose we’re going to find out whomst the heck Yelena and Onyankopon are

“I was concerned for Historia’s safety.” Eren what happened to youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu three years ago you were all still relatively.... yourselves

“Welcome to our defiled island of filth-blooded devils, you’re gonna to love it here.” Again, thank u to Levi for being who he is

“But as we gradually set aside the labels we have for one another, and worked to see each other as people, we can reach an understanding.” SCOOOOUTS WHAT HAPPENED TO UUUUUUUUUUUU WHERE ARE THE TEENS WHO PLAYED IN THE SEAAAAA

“Thank you for every tasty meal you made for her.” Ahhh Nicolo loved Sasha even despite their different upbringing that’s so sad

“Right, Annie? Say something, please.” Can’t remember if I brought this up when Armin first ate Bertholdt but imo it’s been an underpinning of Armin’s actions throughout the series that he has some deeper feelings for Annie, so it is not lost on me that both vessels of the Colossal Titan have liked Annie

It tickles me every time Hange calls Eren out for his crazed muttering

I can’t believe the pay-off for Mikasa being the only East Asian person on this island is that she’s a lost princess but of course, why not?

“But I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect match than you.” Okay Historia, I see your subtle flirt with Mikasa, I am not opposed to wlw princess vibes 👀👀👀👀👀👀

“Zeke will pass on the Beast Titan to an individual who has royal blood, and that person must spend the 13 years they’ll have left bearing as many children as possible.” Gross. Also if this so-called royal blood is so important, it really should be Zeke who fucks as many child-bearing people as possible bc someone with functioning testes can typically make waaaaaaaaaaaaay more babies in that time than someone with a uterus

EUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE THAT HISTORIA IS HAVING A BABY JUST FOR MILITARY PURPOSES; GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh wait, she chose to find a partner and get pregnant in opposition to the military’s timeline? Hmmmm, still hate it

Hahahaha I guess now we know why everyone’s so much beefier, they were building railroads

“You brats got taller. It’s like you’re sprouting up just to spite me.” Hahaha Levi

Eren’s friends all going around and offering to be his Titan heir (and, as a result, EAT HIM) is so fucking funny, Jean being too smart, Connie and Sasha being too dumb, Mikasa being too valuable (not to mention the fact she could never eat Eren jkhgkjhg)

“Because you’re important to me. More than anyone ese. I hope... you’ll live long lives.” [Eren’s entire friend group blushes] I too wonder, Jean, what the hell kind of mood they’re trying to set here kjhgkhgkgh

Jean raises a very fair point about Eren not caring who lives or dies if he’s willing to send his whole friend group into battle

Tho as a counter to Connie, he of all ppl should recognize laughter as a trauma response

Like, laughing is exactly what Eren did when Hannes died, and he was definitely mourning then

Also good that we are finally getting some Current Emotional Narrative Focus on the literal PROTAGONISTS

“All are welcome at the Braus Stables,” I can’t believe Sasha’s parents are taking in the kid who killed their daughter oh nooooooooo

Wow Louise, what an unexpected callback to the evacuation of Trost

“But [the invasion of Marley] was recent, and my mother was killed four whole years ago.” Kaya is also an unexpected callback, but damn, I don’t think u can talk Gabi out of her dedication to generational sin

Side note: The legacy of Sasha rescuing a child vs the child who murdered her, super fucked up

“You don’t have to apologize for Marley, you just happened to be born there.” Kaya killing Gabi with kindness

Incredibly pot-kettle for Reiner to have any objection to Zeke defecting lmao he did exactly what you did, dude

“Well, you are a boy at that age; I bet you’d like to do all kinds of ‘discovering’ with Annie, if you could.” On one hand, Hitch u right, on the other hand, Armin would never get involved-involved with Annie unless it was reciprocated, and on a foot, he’s like 20 now right? Shouldn’t he have a grasp on his hormones by this point hgjhgkjhg

Yelena’s description of Eren’s divine fury is truly filling in the Venn diagram of Death Note and AOT fans huh

“You’re right that there would be no harm in letting us talk to him, so why would [Premier Zachary] forbid it?” My current guess is he’s testing how well Armin and Mikasa will abide by military orders

Well, Armin’s guess is usually better than mine, so I guess it’s Plan E(at Eren)

Did Eren just bisect the Premier?????????? Eren, once again I am asking, what the fuck??????????????

“We believe that whoever delivered the chair must’ve planted a bomb in it.” Oh good, it was not Eren, but it was probably those fanatic scout recruits

“Armin. The hell is going on right now?” Same, Mikasa, same

On a more lighthearted note, was the timeskip (aside from being a shorthand for large leap in character motives) mostly to age and beef Eren up, because it would’ve been harder to pull off this Messiah on the Hill moment if Eren were still a skinny fifteen-year-old?

“But as a result [of adapting to turbulent times] our prestige has been reduced to the point where we’re now derided as a pack of wretched, money-grubbing vixens.” Hey now, Lady Azumabito, what’s wrong with being a money-grubbing vixen

“Armin and I were there when the bomb went off; we almost got killed by the blast.” But whether Eren instigated the assassination or not (I suspect not) seriously I do not fuck with any version of Eren that would let Armin or Mikasa die what happened to the boy who was ready to have an all-out brawl with Levi on the chance Armin could get to live?????

Another mild bit of knowledge I recently had was that Eren would eventually look older and have long hair. In S3 Part II, I was incredibly convinced that that would come as a result of defection based on Armin’s death. And I’m not saying timeskips are always pointless, but they are often used to get around the fact the character you wrote just Wouldn’t Do That

Eughhhhhh they are finally explaining how Zeke has been long-distance Titan transforming, poor Ragako and Connie :(

“And seeing as you murdered every person who lived there, you should learn the name, you bearded shit.” Levi is the only person in this show that gives me any kind of peace

HAHAHAHAHA a moment of recognition for this dialogue (it’s me I’m the ladies - also RIP Petra)

Zeke: Doubt you were well-liked by the ladies. Considering how you think you know what everyone else is feeling.

Levi: I do know. And I was liked enough. So.

Zeke, who has never been liked by a lady, bitterly: Well, good for you!

“Guess that makes us even, you Eldian devil.” 1) The fuck, Nicolo 2) Is that wine poisoned or smth

Update from 7 minutes later: Yes, but also no

Well I think with Gabi’s murderous monologue there goes the last of whatever sanity Nicolo had left

The Scouts still not wanting harm to come to Gabi despite her killing their friend :(

The way that Mr. Braus is holding that knife against his fingers really looks like he’s about to cut his hand a la the Titan Gang but that would be an abrupt change of scene

“Way I see it, when it comes to shoulderin’ the sins and hatreds of the past, that burden should fall to adults like you and me.” MR. BRAUS <3

Kaya’s murderous rage about Sasha was entirely expected but still sad

So like...... everyone in the military who drank that wine will become a Titan whenever Zeke wants? HORRIFYING

“What the hell became of the hope we all looked towards?” Oh don’t worry Levi, things are about to get much, much worse

“Why would I want that? Always with the killing. It’s like it’s all you ever think about. Just like someone else I know.” Armin said: Gabi, you remind me of my BFF Eren, who also loves murder <3

Eren said: Speak of the devil and he doth appear

Floch has never had a good opinion in his whole damn life, everything he says, I’m like ‘go fuck yourself, Floch’

“And you wouldn’t put us at risk either. You care about us more than anyone!” THAT’S WHAT I’M SAYING MIKASA (itslazywriting.jpg)

“Then part of you has become Bertholdt. Within you is an enemy, who has feelings for another enemy.” I think Armin had feelings for Annie pre-eating Bertholdt, but maybe that’s just me

Eren calling Mikasa, a survivor of human trafficking, a slave, is gross as hell. Eren can go fuck himself too. WHAT HAPPENED TO ‘YOU’RE IMPORTANT TO ME!’ THESE ARE YOUR FRIENDS, MAN!!!!!!!! THE NARRATIVE HAS YET TO GIVE ME A GOOD JUSTIFICATION FOR WHY YOU’RE SUCH A DICK NOW

“The mere sight of you has always made me so damn angry. And now I finally know why. I just couldn’t stand to look at a slave with no mind of her own, who always followed orders without question.” SHUT THE FUCK UP EREN, ARMIN AND MIKASA WERE YOUR FRIENDS FOR YOUR ENTIRE CHILDHOOD, AND YOU LOVED THEM, DUMBASS

“Believe me when I say this, Mikasa. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve hated you.” I will note that Eren and Mikasa’s relationship has always had a weird tone bc Mikasa was exuding a ‘siblings by chance <3 lovers by choice’ energy but Eren, despite not responding to those feelings, LOVED HER AS A FRIEND! WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GUY WHO VOWED TO PROTECT MIKASA AND DISCOVERED HIS COORDINATE POWERS IN AN EFFORT TO PROTECT HER???? WHY ARE WE IGNORING THE PAST THREE SEAAAAAAASONSSS UGH

HONESTLY? GOOD FOR ARMIN, I’D ALSO PUNCH EREN!!!!!

“Is there any wine left?” “Of course not, we’ve been here a month, there’s not a single drop left.“ If Levi becomes a Titan or is killed I will riot. This show is already hot wet garbage, I can’t see it getting any better in the remaining half season

Thank god for Levi, who has done so many wrong things, but has principles, and I love him with my whole dumbass heart

“I want you to beat up the Commandant here mercilessly until he can’t stand anymore.” Eren and Floch 2022 for the Worst President and Vice President that any nation has ever seen

Update from two years later: I can’t believe I am STILL watching this stupid fucking show

“Your throw has some serious heat behind it, Zeke!” You’re telling me that Zeke’s entire Titan fighting style and ideology is based on the fact that he’s good at baseball and Ksaver zoned in on his daddy issues

“The truth is, [your parents] never loved you,” said Ksaver to Zeke, in what might be a true statement, but still probably is something you shouldn’t say to a child

So given his youth respective to Annie & co., Zeke is supposed to be what, max 10 years older than Eren? He’s 30? He’s aged like sour milk

“Would it be possible for the Founder to make it so that none of us can have children anymore?” What’s the endgame of this eugen!cs plotline 4 real bc it makes me want to throw up

So Zeke’s plan... is to have Eren... enforce eugen!cs by way of mass sterilization????? Why would someone write this story? Why am I still watching this story? I hate it, I hate it so much

“If the Eldians in this town had never been born, then none of them would have to suffer and die in the plan that you and I are about to carry out,” said Eren, like he and Zeke weren’t 100% responsible for each and every suffering from hereon out

WHY DO PEOPLE IN REAL LIFE HAVE EREN POSTERS ON THEIR WALLS?? EREN GIVE ME SOME HOPE UR NOT ENTIRELY THE WORST AND YOU’VE GOT SOME OTHER OBJECTIVE OR PLAN IN MIND, PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me, still trying to finish this show despite the bone arsenic it gives me every episode:

I still don’t think Levi is dead despite being exploded upon (twice), however he dies (as I’m almost sure he will), he’s gonna go out fighting

Now that I think about it, I assume he will fight Eren, and I hope he kicks him in the ass

“Assuming that he hasn’t just lost it, I don’t see him [hurting Armin and Mikasa] without having some kind of reason.” Finally, a word of sense. Jean and Levi 2022 for a Government Which Still Probably Sucks, But At Least The Public Can Trust That They Have Some Kind of Sense of the Common Good

I can’t believe Gabi is STILL holding onto the Good Eldian/Bad Eldian dichotomy in spite of everything she’s seen

“But to think that your cause was so noble. It just touched my heart!” I am assuming Armin’s crocodile tears to Yelena also have some greater plot purpose

Eren said: Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal Pieck

Turns out, I was wrong. Levi is dead. THANKS FOR NOTHING, AOT

WAIT, HANGE TOOK HIM, I’M HOLDING OUT MINIMAL HOPE

“I saw a girl I didn’t know, sculpting the earth to reform my body.” Queen Ymir, I guess?

“I don’t trust Marley one bit. Having said that, I trust the comrades who fought at my side completely.” Pieck as the only person in this dumbass military who has some perspective

They really do just breeze past Gabi being chained to Pieck’s severed hand LMAO, where does the cuff go?

Yelena’s learning of Eren’s no. 1 skill: Not listening to anyone

“Who else could talk Marley into doing something so stupid?” Firstly, pot-kettle, Eren, and secondly, yeah, sounds about right. Reiner and Eren remain the most out of their minds of anyone in this whole show

Magath really talking about bringing an end to 2,000 years of hatred like Marley had nothing to do with it

I’m not sure what the Jaegerists were expecting, their artillery isn’t really designed to fight people one-on-one

“I’d like to hear [Onyankopon] out at least. ‘Kay?” Armin’s kekkei genkai is immeasurable patience. My god

“[...] That the world is more interesting with different kinds of people. I think you believe that. And I think that belief goes against everything Zeke’s doing.” I just don’t understand what the end game is here! Like, what is the point!!!!!!!! What are you trying to say!!!!!!!!!

“Do you actually believe Eren wants to stop all Eldians from having children? You honestly think he’d go along with that?” NO ARMIN, THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN SAYING FOR THE LAST HALF SEASON

All this said: Starting to lose my faith, buddy, seems a little too optimistic at this point

Fnfjnfjfnf Eren’s friends said: I’ll rescue him, but I’m not happy about it

Poor Falco and Nile, hate that that they’re sitting in a dungeon, waiting to be turned into Titans. Zeke, ur the worst

“I’m glad that we’re fighting towards a common goal, now.” Can I just say, I am glad that for once since this season began, the Scouts/104th cadet corps have some sense of agency? Good grief

Quick question, what in the fuck is wrong with Yelena? What kind of Junji Ito-ass expression did she just make?

Also, doesn’t bode well for Armin that Yelena agrees with him

If Nile gets shot for trying to help Falco see his brother, I’m gonna scream

“There were never any devils on this island.” FINALLY, GABI!!!!!!!!!! It took like, at least 4 different encounters with kind people (Jean and co., the Braus family, Armin, Nile) for the lesson to stick

“So yeah, Udo and Zofia are dead ‘cause of me. And also, I’m in love with you.” Being 12-years-old is tough in this economy

Colt really has a lot of information to process about his brother today. Confessing to unintentionally facilitating mass casualty, love, and his imminent death/dehumanization

“So that’s where my dear little Pieck met her end.” Is it though? No body, no death

Yeah, thought so. Zeke’s never been correct about anything

Does the ep title ‘Two Brothers’ foreshadow both Zeke and Falco dying, as one of half of two brothers? Truly unfortunate for Falco, he’s just a little guy

The real question is if the Scream can also compel Armin, or Annie. They’ve never tried it on Intelligent Titans, I don’t think

Also, Annie was able to Scream Titans to do stuff, back in those woods. She could also be of royal blood?

Also speaking of the whole royal blood thing, if Zeke’s spinal fluid’s ability to turn people into Titans is unique, how were they doing it before Zeke inherited the Beast? Like how did the whole penal colony angle function if Grisha and Dina were turned BEFORE Zeke inherited? Does any Titan spinal fluid work, and if so, why is it so difficult to obtain? Riddle me that

I don’t even have the energy to process how fucked up what just happened was. Nile, Pyxis, and every damn soldier down there getting turned into monsters with no out but death. Falco inadvertently incinerating his brother (for nothing! Porco is going to sacrifice himself anyway!! Colt’s death served NO purpose other than demonstrating his love for his brother)

UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

WHAT

WHAT??????????????????????????????????

EREN?????????????? WHAT???????? THE FUCK?????????

“Those chains around your neck.” “I was starting to wonder if you ever going to say anything about that. Well, even if it took a while, I appreciate your concern.” Zeke said: Don’t worry, we may be in Titan Purgatory, but I have still retained my passive aggressive personality

“Do you seriously believe I’d euthanize the Eldian people?” FUCKING FINALLY EREN! PLEASE TELL ME YOUR PLAN IS TO GET RID OF THE ABILITY TO TRANSFORM INTO TITANS

“I waited to hear your true feelings, and that was the right decision.” This really is the season of sudden but inevitable betrayals

What’s the point of having a Founding Titan or Coordinate at all if you need royal blood to use it? Seems redundant, since it seems like Zeke can more or less control Titans on his own. Is it only the biology thing

“He sacrificed his children on the altar of nationalism.” Absolutely hate to say it, but Zeke, for once in his life, has a point

If the rest of this season could be Baby Eren chasing butterflies, that would be much appreciated. I’d watch 10 hours of that

“He was a shitty human being who did a shitty job as a father.” I like it that it’s Dumping on Grisha Hours, it’s vaguely cathartic

Lmao at Eren ‘you’ve undone his brainwashing’ hahaha u could hold ur stupid fucking plan for months or years, but somehow u think this’ll work? Same old impatient guy

“Why did he wait so long [to take the Founding Titan]?” Hahaha Zeke’s finding out the reality that not all siblings are raised equally

“He set aside his mission for the sake of his son. Would’ve been nice if he could’ve done that for me. Good for you, though.” Take a shot every time Zeke is passive aggressive and develop severe liver damage

The one bit of world-building here that doesn’t give me bone arsenic is that people can develop autonomy within these memories, and seem to have some access to the future. It’s interesting

“I came into this world ready for a fight.” Eren said: Murder is my only personality trait

“I won’t move on if it means abandoning you.” Wild that both Grisha and Zeke decide to put their plans on hold for Eren’s sake, when Eren seems to care so little for it in response

Eren really does have his dad’s whole face, huh:

“The power of the Attack Titan offers us brief glimpses into the lives of those yet to inherit it. Meaning, it allows to witness events in the future.” Ohhhhhh so it turns out Paternity-TSD is not just a Titan thing, it is an Attack Titan thing

“Eren will get everything he wants.” I can’t believe that Grisha’s fall from grace comes from EREN being the one to force his hand, through memories alone, to kill the Founding Family. Eren said: Uno reverse, Dad! I AM THE SHITTY FATHER EVERYONE DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT

Imagine, momentarily, being followed around by a grown version of your 9-year-old who incites you to commit violence. No wonder Grisha’s like this

“But even so, I will always love you. If only... I’d let you be my son instead of trying to make you a soldier.” Is this a hurtful or a healing experience for Zeke

So ur tellin’ me Founder Ymir got Titan powers by falling down a well inside of a tree? Okay Grimdark Inuyasha

Pretty fucked up that the royal family got the Founding Titan power through coerced reproduction, but what in this show isn’t fucked up? I’m so tired

If Maria, Rose, and Sina all had kids, I still think Annie could be from the royal blood line. We’ve got Zeke and Historia from two different blood lines, that still leaves one blond to go

Also also also this backstory doesn’t answer the question of how everyone else became a Subject of Ymir. Is everyone from Titan Hell Island her direct descendant? That doesn’t make any sense, because then everyone would be descended from Fritz also. Honestly the thing I suspect (and have suspected, ever since Ragako) is that anyone can be turned into a Titan, not Eldians specifically

Although, this Foundervision makes it seem like all Eldians do specifically have a specific link to Ymir. Is the implication all the people in that society had a little piece of her? Honestly none of the royal bloodline stuff makes any sense if you think about it for more than a few minutes

“The Titans of the Walls will continue their march until every trace of life beyond our shores is trampled flat, and the people of Paradis, are all that remains of humanity.” Eren said: Survival of the craziest

To paraphrase a tumblr post: If you go to the circus for advice, don’t be surprised when it’s delivered to you by a clown

This episode is called Thaw, which means FINALLY Annie. I have been waiting for her to come back to the side of the Scouts!

Honestly, kind of surprised it’s taken Reiner this long to give up LOL

“We’re doing what they feared we’d do, because we have to.” Do you have to, Jean? DO YOU?

“He did this for his friends. Eren wants to protect us, even if it means killing everyone else on the planet.” [B99 VOICE] COOL MOTIVE, STILL MURDER, JEAN

Well, Connie’s psychological break is much to be expected, I guess

The Braus family and Nicolo automatically protecting Gabi despite how much she’s hurt them personally <3 I love them

“There’s a devil in me, Kaya. And in you, and in everyone else. That’s why our world’s the way it is. There’s a devil inside us all.” I mean, yeah, but I fail to see why you use this framework of oppression metaphors if ur suggesting that everyone is on equal moral standing, because it reeks of ‘there are bad people on both sides’ which like. Then why frame it as slave and subjugator? Why not just frame it as a conflict of nations? They are different metaphors

Armin thanking Pyxis and wishing him rest as he puts him down. Ahhhh oh Armin :( <3

“You survived.” “Damn, no need to sound so excited about it.” That’s also how I feel about Floch, Jean

“I can’t say for sure, but if Eren could do [a Titan transformation reversal], I think he would’ve done it for our comrades that Zeke turned into Titans, instead of leaving them for us to kill.” Armin still hoping for empathy from Eren despite his plot to kill everyone in the world

Although, this does make a bit of sense as to why Eren also reacted so strongly to Zeke trying to scream. He couldn’t undo what Zeke was about to do

“When he brought the walls down, he did it by breaking all Titan hardening, everywhere.” ANNIEEEEEEEEEEE

Turns out Hitch, Annie’s former roommate and prison guard, is voiced by the same VA as Wendy from Fairy Tail. I knew she sounded familiar LOL

Gjklgglhgkjh @ Annie’s story being ‘your found family can also be garbage’

Annie [Tiktok audio voice]: Traumatize ur parents BACK

LMAO @ THIS BANTER, GUESS IT’S BEEN ROUGH FOR ANNIE NOT TO BE ABLE TO SAY ANYTHING FOR THE PAST HALF DECADE

Hitch: Okay wait. I don’t need to hear your entire life story.

Annie: I didn’t need to hear about every failed relationship you’ve had in the past four years. It’s not going to kill you to let me talk for a few minutes.

Did Annie’s dad just die???? It remains unclear

Not to state an obvious point but the Jaegerists are so icky. Who has the capacity for a military coup in the middle of a mass casualty event which affected EVERYONE, including them. Fuckhead Floch, that’s who

Also Shadis admitting he’d let the recruits attack him on purpose and advising them to not fight the coup! He really is a good teacher

“There’s no point in worrying about Eren. We can’t stop him, he’s a lost cause!” Armin has finally reached the limit of his near infinite patience

Not Mr. Braus calling Connie a decent sort to Gabi when Connie’s mid-way through a plan to murder her friend

“Be as annoying, selfish and arrogant as you please.” “Well, that’s kinda rude.” Jean truly deserves to be the protagonist of this show

Connie and Armin going to bat who will be the most mentally unwell companion to their traumatized 12-year-old. Based on Armin’s “Levi saving the wrong person” comment, there seems a very real possibility that Armin might offer to let Connie’s mum eat him instead

“He’s just a poor bastard who refuses to die.” LEVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII LOVE U, NO BODY NO DEATH

I can’t believe Hange’s explanation for Levi not dying via explosive blast is ‘he’s just built different’

I guess he did lose a couple of fingers but my real question is why have u advanced in all technologies except for prosthetics. Feels like that should be a common need here

Appreciate Levi stating Pieck (Finger) and (Theo) Magath’s full names for exposition lol

“Sasha. Would you have understood what I’m about to do?” Considering all of Sasha’s love towards her siblings and protecting kids, no, probably not, Connie

DEAR GOD. THE BEST PLAN CONNIE COULD COME UP WITH IS ASKING FALCO TO BRUSH HIS TITAN MUM’S TEETH. HE TRULY IS THE DUMBEST OF THE ALIVE SCOUTS, AND THAT’S INCLUDING EREN

Full disclosure I had to stop watching this episode bc of all the things this show has made me watch, the concept of Connie trying to Hansel and Gretel this 12-year-old child has pushed me to my limits. I’m back now and I’m gonna try my best

PLEASE DON’T MAKE ME WATCH ARMIN DIE AGAIN, I WILL CRY. PLEASEEEEEEEE

Update from 1 minute later: OH THANK GOD

“I want to try and become the kind of soldier my mum would be proud of,” said Connie, as the child he’d almost murdered wheezed in the background

“Guess whatever you’re worried about doesn’t really bother Jean.” Is it weird that I am kind of hoping Mikasa and Jean end up together? There’s something compelling about how they’re both simultaneously so fucked up in slightly opposite ways now

KFJHKFH the comedy of Annie just being sat right beside Armin and Connie as they theorize about her

“Goodbye. Sincerely, your gloomy roommate.” Me whenever I leave the house

[Mocking] “And I get to live out my life with your sad little gang of xenophobic shitheads?” Onyankopon makes a direct and accurate hit

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I KNEW JEAN WOULDN’T MURDER HIS FRIEND!!! GO SCOUTS!!!!!!!!!

“Don’t you ever brush your teeth [as a Titan]?” “You shouldn’t ask such things, I’m a lady, remember?” LMAO Hange asking the real questions about titan dentistry

“Then that burning pile of bones would’ve haunted me for the rest of my life.” Jean truly has never stopped being in love with Marco this whole time. Bisexual king

“Let’s go.” “Go where?” “To end this, and save the world.” Alright, alright, they do know how to refocus my attention:

The scar on Jean’s dream wife’s cheek showing he still has feelings for Mikasa <3 Ahhh

I appreciate this retrospective on how they coordinated the attack, though it does probably mean the last eps in this part will not advance the narrative that much

“I’ll do it. Eren’s killed too many already. I won’t sit back and watch him steal more lives.” Good for Mikasa!!!

“You remember Willy Tybur’s speech. What’s the world gonna do when we prove him right?” Jean reasonably points out that Eren has essentially guaranteed the destruction of either civilization (Paradis v. the Outside World)

I continue to be surprised about how explicit Armin and Hange have been about the fact Eren is committing geno-[GUNSHOT NOISE]

I know it was established last episode that this was still about Marco for Jean but it’s brought into sharper relief when they have a mise en scene dedicated to every single person they’ve lost, and then Marco gets his own panel. Everything always returns to unresolved trauma and transparent metaphors for bisexuality:

“Hange. In the end, I’ll always be a Scout.” Jean said: I will prevent our friend from committing crimes against humanity, but I’m not like, happy about it

“Compared to the sum of the carnage and misery wrought by Eldia, your island’s suffering is a joke.” I know Magath is probably trying to test their conviction in standing against Eren, but what a dick thing to say to the people whose lives and homes you have been actively destroying for ten years

Also Magath being a poster child for propaganda efficacy

“If we’re going to be at each other’s throats, let’s stick to arguing about stuff we’ve lived through ourselves.” That’s what I’m saying, Hange

God. Mikasa and Armin STILL wanting to get through to Eren to convince him to stop the Rumbling AFTER everything that’s happened. The residual loyalty Eren has proved himself beyond reciprocating

“We shouldn’t be fighting,” said Annie, right after provoking Mikasa to fight

Are we finally going to see the fucking point of Yelena as a character? Being from Marley makes sense for her, but honestly I feel like all she’s done is be like, Non-Island Floch (inciting violence and planning insurrection in her group of volunteers/Jaegerists), and we don’t really need two of those, do we?

“Who wouldn’t want to imagine themselves as the saviour of hundreds of millions of innocent lives? To wash the bitterness of hatred out of their mouths with the honeyed taste of righteousness. From where I sit, it seems like that’s what all of you are doing right now.” Yelena said: Actually, you guys are stopping the wholesale slaughter of all other people on earth for selfish reasons

How the fuck do any of these guys trust drinking alcohol after what happened with Zeke??????????? JEAN YOU WORRY ME

Kind of glad the Scouts got an explanation from Reiner and Annie for how Marco died? At least they get some closure

“We all just started fighting, and assumed it had to be to the death.” Well. In more direct terms, Reiner, Bertholdt and Annie did actually try to kill you all, Jean, but I see what you’re saying about non-lethal force being an option in your lives

“Don’t forgive me. I’m truly worthless.” Bold of you to assume anyone was gonna forgive you, Reiner? LOL

Yeah, Jean beating him up is a very fair response

“Gabi. I’m sorry about kicking you. You okay?” “I’m tougher than I might look, I’m fine.” “I’m glad. Reiner, you’re not getting an apology.” Hahahaha love every bit of this for Jean <3

The way the ep preview is a pic which looks like it’s promoting Armin and Connie’s buddy comedy film, Unhinged and Unhinged-er

I’m glad the Scouts still advocate for non-lethal force, however idealistic

“For now, just stay out of it.” Annie and Reiner said: Our bad for destroying your homeland <3 We will kill your friends so you don’t have to; that’s teamwork!

“Forgive me. All of you. I was... a fool. I’m sorry for my behaviour last night. We were never in the right. I deluded myself into thinking we were the good guys. I wanted to believe the evil I’d done was justified as part of some great cause.” What an absolutely rapid as hell turn-around for Magath, choking out Yelena one (1) time and hearing Gabi and Falco plead for help caused him to self-reflect? Or more likely it’s a Erwin-esque Inspire-to-Death speech

“There’s no way to avoid spilling more blood today. So please, look the other way.” “I’m not doing that. I refuse to let someone else stain their hands in my place.” Armin said: We can murder our OWN friends, thank you very much, Magath

“You won’t make your world any less violent by making it smaller.” Lady Azumabito having some of the realest dialogue of any character

“In any world, it’s important to understand our place [...] This [island] is the world now. You need to recognize your place in it.” Floch said: Have you heard of racism? I have reinvented it

You see? This is why we don’t need two Flochs. One is already too much

Floch has never said anything worthwhile in his whole damn life. Get got Floch. I don’t have a lot of faith in Armin’s plan, but if Floch dies, that’s probably a win for everyone

Fully didn’t realize Daz, Scout who loved to cry about how he was going to die, was still alive. I imagine not for long

Update from 8 mins later: RIP Daz and Samuel

“We’re with you. Eren has to finish the job or this island is doomed.” Armin. This is the best plan your huge brain could come up with? Connie has rubbed off on you in a bad way

It’s a good thing being shot through the face cannot kill Armin atm

Better to have tried and failed at a non-violent solution, I guess

There go the last crumbling threads of Connie and Armin’s mental health

How did Floch NOT die at point blank range of two Titans transforming? Proximity to one transformation was enough to kill Colt! Unbelievable

Well, he got his about 15 minutes later, so there we go

This entire season is just a glorified trolley problem, huh?

“Violence will always be part of human existence. Won’t it, Captain?” Levi looks exhausted. Me too, man

Falco has really handled being in charge of one of the world’s only nine sentient biological weapons as best he could for being 12. He’s trying his best to help

SHADIS!!!!!!! I was curious who took out the reinforcement train

“Last chance for you to take a swim.” “No. I’ll stay. I’ve been looking for a good end to this life.” Shadis said: I must die in the most dramatic way possible

“It’s far too late, but I’ve finally realized how happy I would’ve been if those kids could’ve led normal lives.” Magath is the only adult in this show ever to admit that having child soldiers is bad LMAO:

I’ll hand it to Shadis and Magath, that was a pretty cool way to die

Though Magath’s comment about Shadis being remembered as a hero doesn’t make a lot of sense, considering he was about to explode any and all witnesses to Shadis being there

Annie taking the inevitable loss of Liberio the hardest (unsurprising as everyone else there has lived through the hell of the past four years, while Annie was quite literally frozen in time, regardless of physical aging)

“I don’t want to fight anymore. Not with any of you. Not even with Eren.” Oh, Annie

“It could be that he’s always been like this inside. But if this is the real Eren Jaeger, what did I see in him, that made me keep him so close?” A question we’ve all perhaps been wondering, Mikasa

“They’ll try to feed the car carrots if they manage to catch it.” “Hahah, give them more credit than tha—Wait, are they buying carrots?” I appreciate that we get this reprieve after all of the violence

Also I haven’t said much about Onyankopon because he’s normal and nice, but I do enjoy him

“Well, look at that another enemy immigrant.” To be clear, this show DOES feel like it’s hate-criming me but it seems redundant to discuss that when they’re in the middle of a [LOUD FORGORN NOISE]

LMAO @ Levi being the one to cause the scene after his snark

“You’ve come to make it known that the people of Paradis wish to coexist in peace?” Well, that plan didn’t go very well, it seems

“Mikasa, what am I to you?” Eren said: It is time to talk about the unspoken crush you’ve had on me for 9 years, Mikasa

Hahaha good for the 104th cadets, getting to party and let loose with one another like actual teens for once. Also the way that Mikasa, Eren, Armin and Jean are laid out in the centre does pull at my heartstrings:

“What If I’d given him a different answer? Would we still be in this situation right now?” Mikasa, I don’t think romance would’ve fixed Eren

Eren would literally rather kill everyone on the planet than make Historia become a Titan and have children for the military’s sake. Chivalry is not dead I guess, unlike everyone else on the planet

I can’t believe Eren floated this plan by Historia!! Replacing one burden with an even heavier burden

“There are straightforward explanations for all the behaviours you’re describing, that have nothing to do with genetics or conditioning. [Mikasa] doesn’t slaughter Titans out of some inborn compulsion to keep you alive. She does it because she adores you.” LOL @ Zeke having to be the one who explains this to Eren. The closest he ever comes to actually being a big brother

Now that I’m thinking about it: Where the hell is Zeke? He seems nigh unkillable, are we saying that Eren’s transformation did him in? No body, no death

“That’s what I need. For them to live long and happy lives.” 1) Did you really think, knowing your friends, that any of them would be happy with you killing everyone? 2) Armin is on a timeline just like you, so if we have to take the 13-years-since-Titan-inheritance to live at face value (Idk that I do. I do think it’s something they could lie about), he’s also got less than ten years to live and 3) Doing cruel things out of love does not make them any less cruel!!

Can I just say a big fuckin hoo boy to Eren’s whole life

Their vaguely-brown accents have gotten a lot worse since that first battle with Marley LMAO. 3/10, hire a brown person

“I imagine, we learn that our wish isn’t possible. We never find a way to save Paradis.” My name’s Eren Jaeger and I was born with the gift of self-fulfilling prophecy

This genuinely is sickening to watch. What’s the fucking point

Of course Eren is killing his and Zeke’s grandparents. Why not?

“It’s weird how at ease I feel,” said Armin to Annie, as if it were not kind of a dick thing to say whilst her hometown was being trampled

“What I wanted was to see you.” Armin said: It’s time to talk about MY unspoken crush I’ve had on Annie for the past 4 and a half years!!

“Good is just what people call people who help them.” Armin really dropping some of his most compelling moral philosophy mid-confession

“So when did this start?” “When did what start?” It is SOOOOO funny that they’re choosing to address the romance angle between Annie and Armin NOW, when the whole fucking world is being brutally, unforgivably murdered. YOU COULDN’T HAVE DONE THIS, LIKE, A COUPLE OF EPISODES AGO

Are Yelena and Pieck the same voice actress because they both have a mild lisp like they’re talking around a retainer

“Even trying to say sorry feels presumptuous.” It is, Reiner! You’re learning something. Perhaps, like 10 years too late, but still!

Annie hugging Reiner goodbye even after acknowledging he’s the one who started all this. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh

It’s very kind of Team Save the World to all be so understanding of the fact Annie no longer has any desire to fight

Floch said: I would like to be a problem one last time before I mega-die

“Armin Arlert. As of now I appoint you 15th commander of the Scout Regiment.” Hange said: I volunteer as next for mega-death!!!!

Levi scout-saluting Hange on her heart instead of his.... Ahhhhhhhh

Hange joining all the fallen Scouts in what seems like a very chill afterlife. Good for her

“Killing Zeke should end the Rumbling.” Ah, apparently Zeke is somewhere in his little brother’s Titan body like an extremely fucked up babushka doll. Or a tick

“He died cursing my name. Calling me a traitor, while I told myself I was saving the world. Was it the same? For your team? You, Bertholdt and Annie. Is this what it felt like?” It is also extremely funny that whenever someone does something really terrible to a huge group of people they look at Reiner and go, ‘Is this what it’s like to be you?’ and he goes, ‘Yeah. :(’

It’s also a callback to when he and Bertholdt were Connie’s dads. Shout-out to a less complicated time

“It’s like he wants to find how we’re going to respond to what he’s done.”

Eren Jaeger 🤝 Itachi Uchiha

Deciding the appropriate judgment for committing a pre-emptive massacre against a huge group of people is having your loved one(s) beat your ass

The fact that Eren’s friends are STILL trying to talk him down. God. It is so much more than he deserves:

“But from you, I will take nothing.” Except most of the buildings on our island, the Scout leadership’s influence over the government, the fellow recruits I have radicalized for my cause, at least two of our closest friends who died as a direct result of my actions, every friend you made in Liberio, your sense of personal agency over the future, any hope you had for peace, and any remnants of sanity that you have left

“You will only stop my advance when you stop me from breathing. And you are free to try.” Eren said: We interrupt this plane ride for a message from our Founder. Hey besties, please beat me to death!

“They told us back in training that the Female Titan can manifest the abilities of the rest of the nine by taking in parts of their bodies.” OHHHHH so THAT’S why Annie can scream Titans to do stuff. I still think she could be descended from royalty, but this does explain it in part

Hmmm is Zeke’s spinal fluid why Falco had the memory of flying around with swords in his hands? A pre-transformation memory from Zeke? I had wondered if it was from Cadet Ymir

Turns out Annie’s father is NOT dead, nor are any of the immediate family of the other Marleyan Warriors. Instead, they’re probably going to die very shortly

“We cultivated hate. Nurtured our resentments. Let ourselves believe that could save us. And what came of our failings, we simply dumped onto the ‘Island of Devils.’ This is the result. Those failings gave rise to the monster you see. And it’s marching our hatred back upon us.” General Muller said: Turns out, oppressing people for their ethnic heritage is BAD! Who knew!!!!

All the Marley Eldian parents being like. My bad for inflicting generational trauma onto my children, xoxo

Is Zeke straight up throwing LIGHTNING NOW? Zeke has chidori? What is going ON

“The forces of Paradis are trying to end the Rumbling.” Oh HELL YEAH they are

I’m going to be real honest with you, I am incredibly attached to most of the remaining Team Save the World, so when some or even most of them inevitably die, I will cry. Or be sick. Or both

“Exactly one minute from now, I’ll blast these bones apart.” Armin preparing to kill his best friend to save everyone else. Awful

EREN JUST SWALLOWING HIS BEST FRIEND WHOLE INTO THE FUCKED UP BABUSHKA DOLL WITHOUT HESITATION???? WHAT?????????

“He’s being restrained, but he’s not hurt. The problem, is that he was whisked off towards Eren’s ass.” What a thing to say at a time like this, Levi

“Theses husks are the people who bore the Power of the Nine before us. I don’t know if their minds are still in there or not. But I’m betting the Founding Titan has the ability to resurrect them as many times as it needs to.” Eren said: Hey besties, please fight these Big Fucking Skeleton Ghosts of Your Ancestors and Friends

I suppose the friends part disproportionately affects Reiner, since he was closest to the most former Titans (Marcel, Porco, on top of them all being friends with Bertholdt)

Bertholdt crying in Armin’s Founder Ymir-Induced Suffocation Scape implies the former Titans are CONSCIOUS of being used to hurt their friends and commit gen-[GUNSHOT NOISE]? HATE THAT

“Do you still think we can win?” “Nope. But I don’t care. I wanna fight to the bitter end.” I am in love with you, Jean Kirschtein

“You’re kinda in the way, Mikasa!” ANNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Colour me bananas, but if Falco (I see why they named his character that now) was so certain he could turn into a Bird Titan, why’d he have to do it ON the boat. Couldn’t HE have been on one of the little lifeboats, transforming in the water and swooping away?

“Hang on, where’s Arm—I mean, where’s Pieck?” Annie, you’re allowed to care that Armin’s alive, it’s not weird HAHAHAHAH. It’s weirder that you said it that way

“Your childhood friends sure have a way of getting themselves captured,” said Annie, as if she had not been the first person to capture them

“Damn it. I had a long list of things to tell that dumbass off about.” This is Levi saying how much he loves Eren and doesn’t want to kill him :(

Gjgkgkjgjgjg Annie’s advice to Mikasa about how to deal with their comrades killing the man Mikasa loves: Try not to think about it

“That one. Isn’t it an okapi?” “What the hell’s an okapi?” I too would like to know what an okapi is, Mikasa

“Erwin, I didn’t choose you, and I don’t regret that. I’m entrusting the future with the same look in his eyes as all of you.” I LOVE YOU, LEVI, AND I LOVE YOU ARMIN

The subsequent cut to Armin screaming at his inanimate body about how much he hates it and himself. This show is exhausting

“I should be in a Titan’s mouth right now, so how do I know what’s happening to my friends?” This is a question I also had Armin, but I wasn’t really expecting an answer

“You still seek to multiply? Why? Is continuing the species really that important to you?” Zeke said: Actually, y’all are saving the world because you wanna fuck (Zeke and Yelena fight over who projects a more insane motivation onto the Scouts)

“This strange, lovely thought popped into my head. I felt like maybe I’d been born to race Mikasa and Eren up that hill.” Oh, Armin

Armin seeing this object in the paths as a leaf that reminds him of Mikasa and Eren while Zeke sees it as a baseball him and Ksaver played with. Everything always comes back to baseball and absent fathers

Is the payoff for Armin being Babushka'd for a solid thirty minutes going to be that he’s going to convert all of these Former Titans in Purgatory (aka the Paths) to stop being Eren’s Skeleton Ghost Army? Incredible

I was wondering when Cadet Ymir was going to make an appearance. Good for her!

I also appreciate that Eren’s own (skeleton ghost) father is among the people actively fighting against him. PARENTING

Zeke, as he gets decapitated, probably: See, I CAN be helpful!

“The rumbling just stopped.” THEN WHYYYY are there 45 more minutes in the episode!!!!!!!!! What are you going to do!!!!!!

I would like an explanation on what the glowing-worm-spine-thing that gives people Titan powers is. An alien? A sea creature? A really vengeful spirit? Explain!!!!

“If [the Titan Worm] survived that explosion point-blank, we can’t kill it. The one we should target is Eren. This nightmare won’t end until we take him down.” To be fair, Levi, you just had Armin try to explode Eren too, so can you really kill him?

“Could this be the same gas they used on Ragako village?” “Mikasa, Pieck, get on Falco, we need to leave. Cause only Ackermanns and Titan wielders are immune, remember?” OH MY GOD THEY’RE GOING TO TURN JEAN AND CONNIE INTO TITANS. I KNEW THIS BATTLE WASN’T GOING TO PASS WITHOUT KILLING SCOUTS, BUT OH MY GOD. JEAN. I AM CRYING, THIS IS THE WORST POSSIBLE WAY HE COULD DIE. THE WAY ALL OF THESE PEOPLE’S FAMILIES COULD DIE. I HATE THIS. I AM SICK.

“You’re gonna live without me for a long time. So forget you knew me. Forget, and be free.” I don’t care about this Eren-isn’t-a-mass-murderer fantasy sequence. Any remaining energy I had for this narrative died with Jean

Mikasa kissing Eren AFTER decapitating him is an incredibly weird way to end this battle. Why write this show? What was the point?

HKFHKJFHKFJHFKJHF not them having Eren appear as a child and say sorry for the mass murder!!!! What kinda Naruto behaviour is this!!!

“So you did all that to push us away, huh? To make us turn against you and become the heroes who prevent the annihilation of the human race by killing you.” “You got it. Every human left outside of the walls will owe you a debt of gratitude.” This is the most backwards ass, stupid ass plan I’ve ever heard of. I can’t believe THIS is the excuse for everything I’ve had to witness.

Eren Jaeger 🤝 Itachi Uchiha

If I do ALLLLLL the murders, no one will think badly of my fellow people, even though I am one of those people

“You’re hoping we can all become like the Tybur family and protect Paradis from reprisal.” Except for Jean and Connie who are mega-dead, and Annie, Armin, Reiner and Pieck, who will presumably all die in less than ten years, Falco who has thirteen years left, which leaves Levi and Mikasa to stand for their whole island?

“Founder Ymir, she loved King Fritz.” Of course, who doesn’t love someone who murdered their parents, enslaved them, ripped out their tongue and then [redacted] them and had their kids [LOUD HONK OF A CLOWN CAR]

The way they’re cycling through Eren and Armin’s ages. It does hurt me

“The past and future, it’s all happening at once. And so, I had no choice That day, in that moment, Bertholdt would’ve died, but he had to live, so I sent it away from him and towards mom.” So, not only are you saying that Eren was retroactively controlling Titans from the wall’s breach, but also that HE is responsible for his mum getting eaten? Why does Eren have to be responsible for everything? Can’t things be also Reiner and Bertholdt’s fault?

“You’re a selfish heartbreaker, and I hope she does forget about you because she deserves to be happy!” Sweet of Armin, but I can’t take this seriously inside of everything that’s happened

INSANE OF ARMIN TO BE MORE MAD ABOUT EREN DISREGARDING MIKASA’S FEELINGS THAN HE IS ABOUT THE GENOC!DE. Armin said: Two can play at the unrelentingly crazy takes on what chivalry means, Eren!

“But hey, the good news is, I know of one charming young fella she’s pretty close to already.” You mean Jean, whom Eren’s worm ally Titan-murdered??????

[Sobbing] “No. That’d break my heart. I don’t want her to find someone else. I want to be her one and only love! Even she does get over me, I think it should take her ten years at least!” “Oh, I see. Sorry, I didn’t think you’d say something that pathetic.” HAHAHAHAHA I genuinely just can’t absorb Eren saying this dialogue as true, because it feels so stupid and out-of-character, however, Armin’s response is VERY funny

“Twenty-percent of humanity is all that you manage to save. It’s been determined.” “’Been determined?’ But you determined it. You’re the one who kills them!” Eren said: [Count Frollo voice] It’s not my fault, it’s in God’s plan

“I trampled the world because I wanted it.” This is like, the third set of motivations Eren’s played his hand at. When will we land on one that sticks?

“Why? Why did it turn out this way? I finally know. Because I’m an idiot. I’m nothing more than a garden-variety idiot who got his hands on power. That’s why this is the only resolution I can bring about.” I guess this is motivation #4

“You’ll be joining me? Where?” [Pleasantly] “Assuming it exists, in hell.” Armin’s dialogue is so unrivaled in how crazy it is, I almost admire it

“Yeah. Look for me in hell. I’ll be waiting.” “Right. We’ll be together, for all time.” This is the opposite of meet me in gay heaven energy. Meet me in White Boy Hell:

God. Armin’s scream when he sees Eren is dead. Unbearable

“He said that you would make a choice, and that in the end it would cause the Power of the Titans to be erased from this world.” JEAN AND CONNIE AND GABI ALIVE? ARMIN AND REINER AND ANNIE AND FALCO STAYING ALIVE? ALSO WHY WAS THIS NOT AN OPTION BEFORE? Finally, a reason for all of this. The longest, most chaotic, worst path to a reason, but a reason nonetheless

Eren being like, surprise!!! Here is my post-mass-murder voicemail about how much I love you all, besties! Except you, Pieck, I don’t know you. And everyone’s just like, ‘Aw, I missed him!’

I was worried for a moment that Levi seeing the fallen Scouts was an indication he was dying, but it seems like it’s some kind of goodbye present from Eren

“My name is Armin Arlert. And I killed Eren Jaeger. I stopped the Attack Titan and ended the rumbling.” Armin said: I am not afraid to take credit for the murder of my best friend

“All this time it was you, peeking into my head.” Mikasa’s headaches are actually Maternity-TSD from Founder Ymir? Sure, why not

I suppose it would be unrealistic if the fraction of people alive DIDN’T want to retaliate against the Island. What else could you expect?

“But if we must fight, let it be for an end to fighting.” Historia finally gets some agency after her Farm Pregnancy Arc LMAO

“You know, it’s a real shame your life got longer, Reiner.” HAHAHA Jean. This is the kind of bullshit I missed

HAAHAHAHAHAH ARMIN, I see you and Annie haven’t gotten any better at communicating:

Armin: Don’t forget that we’re Scout Regiment. We’re a bunch of dreamers who don’t know when to quit.

Annie: But I was in the Military Police.

Armin, ignoring her: Anyway—

“After trying to kill each other again and again, we put down our weapons and began to call for peace.” I suppose this is the most tolerable possible resolution to an incredibly deranged show

I can’t believe this series has beaten me down so hard with its bare fists that I feel like 80% of the world dying is not the worst outcome. That is OBJECTIVELY AWFUL. I guess it helps that there’s no death/fighting scenes for last third of this episode. It’s just been so unbearable that if I’m not crying or actively nauseous, it’s some kind of victory. What a horrible show

Are we suggesting Eren has been reincarnated as a bird? Sure, fitting for a wings-of-freedom Scout metaphor moment, I suppose!

I’m not going to comment on the mid-credits scenes. This show has put me through enough. I have followed it through to its conclusion, and its conclusion was as brutal and absurd as the rest of it. Goodnight!

#do i recommend this? no #did i watch it? yes #and now i may put it to rest #to be clear: i have no intentions to post about this show ever again. bye #ayesha talks anime #ayesha liveblogs aot #long post #liveblogging #tw: literally everything #aot spoilers #every kind of violence u can imagine is in this show. EVERY kind #i drafted this such a long while ago that they changed the text editor #as u may be able to tell by the fact it still has indented bullets #aot series #funny enough two years ago i ALSO watched j.j.k and this show successively. probably says something psychologically #if u liked this show. i don't think you'll like my liveblog LOL #(it's more of a record of my viewing experience than anything else)#anyway. next liveblog will be smth lighthearted i promise

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jrueships · 2 years

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ooo OKAY cool thank yall for tagging me in this! i feel so special whenever i get tagged in things like there's a secret security showing me important documents or something like 'mr president. Gay.' ANYWAYS let's get to it!!!

1. which team(s) do you root for?

I like pretty much all the teams and it's kinda contextual for me to decide which to root for at the time? Usually whoevers looking like the underdogs or got the most heartwarming/stand-out players! I'm more-so a player person than a team guy! Does that seem disloyal?? Apparently to my hometown buds 😭 whatever though, player IS in the name, after all ! Even if I don't really watch a team, I try picking one player I like/care about on that team so I can still enjoy watching em when they're on! BUT FOR TEAMS I'D DEF MAKE AN EFFORT TO ACTIVELY WATCH FOR RN ... prolly rockets, sixers okc, spurs, clippers, grizzlies, bucks? Sorry I like my men pathetic and cringe and they're funny. Would i ROOT for them all tho? Prolly not 😭 whatever happens happens !

2. what's your prediction for the 2023 finals matchup plus champions prediction?

Whatever team i didn't name probably LMAO either way warriors or lakers are going to win, you know the drill

3. what's an nba hot take you have?

Men obsessing over sports stats was a direct creation of men trying to gatekeep women from watching sports with an enlightened sense of having an actual personality beyond numbers also people that only watch for sports betting are leeches on life and need to touch grass okay sorry i was kinda kidding on both of my takes but also no

4. who are your favourite players NOT on your favourite team(s)?

how do i make it bold 😭 whatever we fuck on 😎 (i meant fight but ill leave that there tbh) SO hmmm this one is TOUGH i like a LOT of teams.. hm... OH okay actually!! Rj barrett, bones hyland, myles turner, Donovan mitchell, Demar Derozan, cam Thomas, day'ron sharpe (day-day!!), Wendell Carter Jr, Russell westbrook, Andrew wiggins, Otto Porter Jr, terry rozier, frank ntilikina

5. 3 players you would invite to taco tuesday (current or retired)

Michael Jordan because I would like to see the battle of man who lies and doesn't care (mj) and man who lies and cares (lebron). It will be a battle fought by the GOATS of gaslighting, taken place: Taco Tuesday

Lebron , like in a mirror . So it's just lebron alone sitting at a dinner table talking to his mirror while plates of tacos are scattered about untouched. I think.. something would be unearthed. Of golden value !

Jeff teague

6. what's your favourite thing about the nba?

The interconnectedness, the fact that this is an achieved dream job for the guys playing, the fact that memories are made from people making memories (fans remembering the little details from a game they attended/watched off the players just living their dreams) etc etc u know! Just people enjoyin the best part of being people! Unique but shared enjoyment !! Fuck with that heavy !!!!

7. tag however many people you want!

Whoever wants to or hasn't done it!!! This was fun so go have fun !! Tell em TED sent you ;)

#ted talks #thanks for the tags!!! this is so cool <3 i had a blast !!#ted tumbunity things

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layingwithlay · 2 years

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This umbrella academy Au IM working on bc I want Stan to come fucking back:

He is biologically Lila’s and Diego’s. Now before you say anything like he is to light, everyone comes in a different shade no matter who your parent is. Genetics is like riding your bike blindfolded. You have no idea what comes next.

Anyways, as i was saying, Lila flipped out when she found out she was pregnant with Stan. And she didn’t know what to do.

So throughout her pregnancy she knew one thing, she was going to give Stan up for adoption. To whoever the hell wants the baby.

Technically Stan was born in the 80s Germany, around the same time Lila met Trudy.

One night Lila had a freak out over being a mother to an 6 month old baby and left Stan with Trudy.

She told Trudy she would be back soon she just needed air, but her soon was 12 years later.

Trudy adopted Stan when he was a baby and was his mother for years. Maybe Not the best but she tried her hardest considering she wasn’t prepared for a baby.

Lila comes back 12 years later, well for her it’s only been 2 years. She pops in while Trudy is gone on a trip leaving the kid there. She pretty says on the lines of:

“Hey IM your actual mom, also a superhero of some sort. How would you like to go to the future and meet your day who doesn’t know you exist and also is a superhero”.

Stanley agrees because he is Stanley. That’s all there is to it.

So then Stan meets his dad and bonds. Neither Lila nor Stan tell Diego anything about Stan’s past.

Including the part where she didn’t raise him for 12 years And that Stan DIDNT even know his mom until a day before he met his dad.

Then when Diego finds out he gets pissed, bc how can someone abandon their child until they are useful to them? Though he is thankful he met Stan before Stan became an adult with mother and father issues lmao.

That’s all I have I guess? Like if u want me to write this bs.

#stanley umbrella academy #diego hargreeves #lila pitts #stop coming for my mans Stanley like that

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many-gay-magpies · 2 years

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okay you've got me popping some popcorn and settling down bc I LIKE THE WAY YOU THINK AND YES GIVE ME ALL THAT PRE-DARK MOON STUFF. PLEASE. IM A SUCKER FOR GOOD HEADCANONS AND THEN CANON COMES ALONG TO RUIN SHIT. pre-dark moon my general thoughts/timeline was that the boys were born vampires, and uncommonly strong ones, so they were taken to the "orphanage" to observe their powers and raise them in a contained environment away from the world. eventually they break out (not necessarily bc orphanage evil but bc smth tells me these kids did Not want to sit down and be obedient). i also had a sense that the orphanage was a distant victorian past and the boys at decelis is the present decades later, trying to move through life away from that traumatic past. once dark moon/tamed-dashed jpn dropped i adopted more of that evil orphanage mindset. and thats when i started thinking about sooha. what if sooha was born superpowered like the boys, but because she's not an actual vamp she evaded the kidnapping by the orphanage and thats why she doesn't have that story. think about it— they could have this deep connection because they all originated together somehow, but the orphanage taking the boys separated them. and thats why the low-grade vampires are searching for sooha. because the organization realized they missed one.

AND RLY NO LITERALLY YALL THINK IT WAS SOME SORT OF "ATTACK" FROM LOW-GRADE VAMPS???? U HAVE A VERY STRESSED AND VERY MISCHIEVOUS GROUP OF SEVEN BOYS WITH PYROKINESIS, SUPER STRENGTH, SUPER SPEED, ETC. HAVE U EVER HEARD OF TEENAGE ANGST AND REBELLION.

no bc youre So right idc if its supposed to be deep or not. idc about "oh dont think about it too much and just enjoy the story." NO. I WANT ACTIONS AND EXPERIENCES TO HAVE CONSEQUENCES. TO HAVE WEIGHT. I WANT TO SEE LASTING EFFECTS THAT ALTER THE COURSE OF THE STORY. WHATS THE POINT OF ANY BACKSTORIES OR BATTLES OR TRAUMAS IF THEY DON'T . MEAN ANYTHING????? hybe im angry at u

-vrvr anon

hehehe YES sit down with your popcorn because boy have i got some CONTENT for YOU. idk if youd be interested in reading the old enhaverse shit i have posted or not (forewarning if you are i actually havent gone back and read it in a while so it may be. bad-- like i remember it being decent but that was like last year so my standards could have changed LMAO) but if you ARE i could link those. and also maaaan the SHIT we put sunoo's character through omg those were some wild times

firstly though id like to adress your pre-dark moon headcanons because. that actually makes a lot of sense HFBFJFBJF and it fits with the addition of sooha too! OOH WAIT OR I JUST HAD AN IDEA. in the scenario where the boys were turned into vampires (not necessarily born as them; idk how that would work so im not gonna try and figure out the logistics just yet), then experimented on to be made into the better, more functional and long-lasting superpowered vampires, maybe the superpower part was like... an afterthought of sorts, just added on to make them even BIGGER powerhouses of destruction/idk whatever. but then whoever made them (im just gonna call them the organization for now like you) may have been like "wait, could this superpower gene... work on normal humans?". so then they either take a bunch of pregnant moms OR a bunch of newborn babies and run all the experiments and shit and well,, most of them die (because a: i like angst and b: it would explain why sooha's the only superpowered human in the story/why the organization wants her so bad) except one: sooha. but sooha's mom obviously doesn't WANT her daughter to live her life as a lab rat, so she figures out a way to get her daughter and herself out, escaping and probably pulling some wild identity-alteration shit so she and her daughter can live safely without the threat of being constantly hunted hanging over their heads.

WAITWAITWAIT OR. omg okay im sorry my brain is doing one of those things where i try to figure out the plot holes of a story or concept literally as im explaining it to someone hsjbffj give me a second-- if we're going with the timeline where the "orphanage" was like a long time ago and everything. maybe sooha's MOM was one of the babies that got experimented on, and she was the only one that didnt die, but she never showed any signs of superpowers or anything so the organization figured she was a dud... but it turns out, years and years later when she has her OWN kid (sooha), whatever weird superpowered genes the organization injected her with manifest in her daughter instead, and the organization is AFTER sooha because they somehow caught wind of this miraculous superpowered child who wasn't a vampire and went "oh shit so it DID work" and now theyre after her. idk how sooha and the boys having their whole weird ✨connection✨ would work in this situation, maybe they can just feel that she has the same weird superpowered genes as them and they feel drawn to her because of it? idk

really i dont know how that entire storyline would go—i just went off on a whole other train of thought there lmao (that was not intended, sorry). now though i wanna start telling you about my friends and i's pre-dark moon ideas because it ties into the idea of how the vampires originated and also cuz. well i want to. HDJFBFJFB (im gonna group this into sections actually via titles because i have a feeling this is gonna get insanely long again)

pre-dark moon: selene and the orphanage

okay SO: the train of thought that we had initially sort of started because of the mysterious princessy/queen-y figure that appeared in the drunk-dazed mv (who i now realize was most likely meant to be sooha, but SHHH we're in pre-dark moon headcanon territory now lets ignore that). we conceptualized her as this sort of... motherly or goddess-like "vampire queen" figure. in the story we constructed, she was the one that MADE the boys, although because we were all sluts for angst and trauma it turned... very quickly dark. she was very definitely NOT a good guy lmao.

the idea with the orphanage was that the vampire queen (who i called selene, based off of the greek or roman goddess of the moon and mother of vampires-- i think, i might have my myths mixed up there) was the one that started it all. she orchestrated the orphanage, hired all the staff, ran the entire "project" so to speak: she wanted to create more vampires like her. maybe she was lonely at first, but got driven mad by the loneliness and the vampirism combined; maybe she wanted to build an army. i don't know, we never got her motives fully straightened out. the pills that the boys all took in given-taken were pills containing her blood: that was how they were turned (in our story vampires didnt get turned via biting, they got turned by consuming the blood of another vampire; i think i read about that somewhere). it was a very slow process, so the boys (who had all been brought to the orphanage as kids and grew up there together) weren't aware of what was happening until it was too late. now, we stuck with the whole "orphanage bad and abusive, enha escape" storyline from the very start, so that happened; they ran away and set out in the world on their own, constantly on the run from the orphanage and selene.

now onto the more... character-specific parts (from here on out im gonna refer to the enha boys with a c! before their names to distinguish them from the real people because the dark moon names. uh. dont exactly work with the kind of story we created lol). unbeknownst to the rest of the boys, while they were all still in the orphanage, from the time when they were little kids up until their escape, c!sunoo felt sort of estranged and overlooked—like the others didnt care about him as much, or like he was irrelevant (this wasnt true, they cared for him a lot, but you get the idea). he started building up a habit of running away from the orphanage and into the forest surrounding it, where he would meet up with selene—who at the time he didnt know was the vampire queen. selene basically fucking groomed and manipulated him jnto believing the others didnt love him, she was the only one who would ever TRULY love him, the others would never understand, etc etc. she was a massive bitch lmao that's basically it

now this idea did come in part from my love of traumatizing characters, but it ALSO came from the entire enhaverse circle on tumblr thinking sunoo in the mvs was like. evil. but artzyy and i didnt like the idea of his character being just straight-up evil and not caring about the other boys so we were like "but what if he was manipulated" and then it just sort of spiraled from there. after the boys escape the orphanage, they come across this castle where selene lives. none of the boys know all the shit she's pulled with c!sunoo—they just think she's this benevolent motherly figure, if a slightly suspicious one. after a while of staying in the castle they figure out she's no good and escape, again, but by then c!sunoo has already been roped into betraying them by selene and he works as a sort of double agent for the rest of the story, sowing their demise at selene's behest. there are... a LOT of feelings had about this, just generally, by everyone. as you'd probably expect.

another thing to know about me and my mutuals' version of the enhypen that lore is that we were all apparently gay and longing when we were coming up with all of this so we sort of projected and. made the characters into this one giant gay poly qpr situation. i really dont know what happened HHDJFHFJNFN the fever mv came out and we started making jokes about it being gay (because WE all were; still are, that hasn't changed) and the jokes became less and less like jokes the more we posted about them, which tended to happen a lot with us for some reason. so. yeah.

and THEN of course the official dark moon teasers got dropped and hybe went "haha hey theyre brothers actually" and all of us at dear old engeneblr went "haha wow okay thats great!!!" while simultaneously shoving all our gayass character ideas under the metaphorical rug. and like yeah it ended up being revealed that the guys arent BLOOD brothers, they were just raised in the orphanage together and DECIDED to be brothers, but now i see them as being far too familial for that to ever not be weird.

(i even had a thing going for a while where i was compiling all the stuff about enhaverse to make into its own story, with different names for the characters to separate them both from the dark moon boys AND from the real-life enhypen; i ended up losing interest and its remained a hardly-touched note in my phone ever since, but the character names are still on there and i think theyre pretty snazzy if i may be allowed to toot my own horn about it)

okay NOW. to address:

the rest of your ask

-because that did indeed get just as insane and long-winded as i was expecting lmao. i wanna double back for a second and kinda talk about your sooha ideas again because,, i know i went on that whole tangent about how she and they boys could be related in the whole "artificial/experimental vampire" thing i had laid out, but i really do like the idea of them somehow all being BORN superpowered like that but being seperated—if thats the case, who or what made them? how old were they when they were seperated? what the hell HAPPENED?

(i really dont know how that storyline would work but i just got a very very cute idea involving it which is just. so you know the whole concept in canon where sooha was a "princess" in a past life and the boys were her "knights"? what if those are repressed memories of them all playing make-believe as kids with sooha as the beautiful princess in the tower and the seven boys as the knights that rescued her from the fearsome dragon? what if?)

okay A N Y W A Y moving on (before i go on another tangent). jino totally burned that fucking orphanage down i dont care what anyone says, the organization probably went "hahahaha oh yeah it was an ATTACK we were ATTACKED these children TOTALLY didnt leave of their own volition they had a GREAT time here but they were FORCED to LEAVE by the ATTACK" to cover up the fact that they were harboring teens in the midst of their respective rebellious phases while also having literal superpowers without any fireproofing. like. what

"oh dont think about it too much and just enjoy the story" i cant enjoy a story with no substance. i cant ENJOY a story when theres nothing there for me to actually GET INTO. "just enjoy the story dont think about it too hard" is used for silly comedies and stuff. not THIS. i can't enjoy a story if its straight up not written well. the meaning and the trauma and the impact IS the part that i enjoy.

*deep, deep inhale* WHEW okay. WOW. did uh . did your popcorn last you through all that? GMVDBFBFN i know we already established that i shouldnt be sorry for writing a lot but i,,, still kind of feel a little sorry--

#i enjoyed writing it all tho ! i hope you enjoy reading it #asks #anon 📝#vrvr anon #if you couldnt tell i had a LOT of thoughts about pre-dark moon enha lore #dark moon universe #dark moon #dark moon stuff #enhaverse #shit i havent used that tag in a while. wow. fuck #also editing to add this in the tags (because i was going through my old enhaverse tag for The Nostalgia):#so i just remembered now that me and my enhaverse pals had TWO ENTIRELY DIFFERENT TAGS/UNIVERSES for enha lore. one for our own personal #-story ideas and then one for (what we thought was) the canon lore. and BOTH OF THEM ENDED UP BEING VASTLY DIFFERENT FROM CANON #goddd that was so frustrating hgjsvfjfbfj

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