#its so sad though cause some of them are my friends like people im close to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chaepink · 5 months

Note

can u make headcannons on sub!yan’s tendencies in the relationship?

also can i be 🉑 or 🌝 anon?

dating sub!yandere boys hcs ♡

sub!yandere boys when they date you.

wc: 1.1k+ words | masterlist

dom!fem!reader, unhealthy relationship, mention of killing/murder, both sfw and nsfw!, mention of feminization, bondage

note: yes you can be 🌝 anon!

— your yandere would be possessive of you, even more compared to when you two were just friends

— well, you thought you two were just friends. he already assumed you two were together sometime earlier during his friendship with you

— he would do anything for you in order to make sure you're happy and safe

— a friend of yours is getting too touchy with you? well the next day that friend is ignoring you and when you confront them, they look at you scared and quickly scurry away from you. did your yandere do something to them? surely not

— a weird guy keeps following you around your neighborhood? well a couple of days later you see on the news that his body has been found near a river and weirdly enough, you havent seen your yandere on the days before the guy's death

— you complain to your yandere about how a teacher gave you a bad grade on something you worked so hard on? suddenly your grade changes to a A and that same exact teacher suddenly resigns from the school

— he'll try his best to know where you are most of the time and try to follow you back home to make sure you're safe (though its really obvious, you don't acknowledge him so he thinks he's actually doing something)

— but no matter how scary and possessive they are of you, they just want to be good for you, really

— its almost as if they're a puppy for you, always there for your beck and call

— give them a simple command and they'll do it immediately, no questions asked

— ask them to buy you a snack from the nearest store? he'll return back with a bagful of others that he thought you would like

— they're super clingy and always want to be near you

— somehow they manage to have the same exact classes that you have and at the same time. maybe you guys are just lucky? little do you know that your yandere hacked into the principal's computer to change his schedule to fit with yours

— if you're sick, they would immediately fetch you some medicine and make so many bowls of your favorite soup that you're not sure you could finish them all

— they would be so sad when you're sick cause that means they can't be as close as they usually are with you :(

— in bed, nothing changes at all. rather, he becomes even more infatuated with you

— they're still so good and obedient for you, always following your commands. its cute

— like what i said with him doing it with no hesitation, your yandere is eager to do what you say

— tell him to get on his knees? say less as he's already doing so, staring up at you with such innocent eyes

— tell him to open his mouth for you to stick your fingers inside? he opens wide and sticks out his tongue in such a sinful manner, hazy eyes absolutely begging you to make him choke on your fingers as drool drips down his chin

— order him to suck your strap and get it all wet? he's quick to get in between your legs and get his hands on the fake dick, his mouth going straight to bobbing it up and down and gagging as it hits the back of his throat. he'll try to subtly grind his hard on against your foot without you noticing but you do anyways but he's being a good boy so you allow it

— and oh my god is he so shameless in public

— no hesitation in telling you what he wants you to do to him when there are people around

— you'll be at brunch with some of your friends and suddenly you'll feel a hot breath on your ear, such sinful words coming soon after

"im wearing lingerie under my clothes, your favorite set too. wouldn't you like to just ruin me right here and now? make me cry and look so pretty while you show everyone im yours?"

— safe to say that you immediately dragged him to the family bathroom and fingered him until he was gripping onto you for dear life, begging and crying out for you to stop and take pity on him (he's lying about wanting you to stop)

— when you're out with errands or just at work, he'll take such sinful pictures of himself to send to you randomly

— the pictures would include his legs spread out, a obvious bulge in his underwear, and something adorning his body whether its lingerie, a maid outfit, or rope that's tied so tightly on him

— if he's feeling like teasing you even more, he'll send whimpering audios that beg you to come home and fuck him and if you listen close enough, you'll hear some wet noises that let you know that he's masturbating

"f-fuck, [name] come back s-soon, please? i-i miss you so much! i- ah! i-im wearing your favorite outfit right now! i'll be a g-good ngh boy waiting for you ♡"

— itll end up with you rushing home after you're finished to fuck him dumb in that outfit, making it stained with his tears and cum

— he knows you can't really get him pregnant but your yandere just loves those straps with cum in them that you can just shoot inside him whenever you're fucking him fast and rough

— that'll make his eyes roll back and head throw backwards as he lets out such a loud mewl at the feeling of your fake cum filling him up

— and afterwards he'll tease you by using his fingers to push the cum thats gushing out of his hole back in before licking his fingers

— although your yandere is a good boy for you most of the time, theres times where he's a brat

— he'll talk back to you whenever you command him to do something or cum without permission

— but just some long edging or overstimulation will break him and turn him into a sobbing mess

— tying his hands to the headboard and keeping his legs spread apart whilst a vibrator is inside him on the highest setting is his favorite punishment

— your yandere thinks you don't know that since you do it all the time but you actually do know it, you just love the way his face is stained with his drool and tears while his chest and the sheets underneath him is covered in his cum afterwards

— such a slut but we love him for it

ty for reading to the end! ❤ - chaepink

╰┈➤ masterlist | rules

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deafeninggardenerpanda · 8 months

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Do you have any Mirror GSA headcanons? 👀

i was going to draw some more stuff with the actual mir gsa but im going through some weird artblock rn so heres some text instead 😍

unlike my gameverse mirror counterparts where they have their own world and own histories, animeverse mirror counterparts are manifestations of the regular counterparts most aggressive worst traits or critical flaws. (ironically thats more in-line with the real game lore than my game lore but anyways) rather than being its own dimension, ultimately the purpose of the dimensional mirror in this universe is to create adversaries to help the regular versions of those characters realize their own flaws and thus become a better version of themselves. they arent meant to be defeated through regular combat, theyre a good bit stronger than the regular counterparts for one reason or another and just respawn through the mirror indefinitely if you can manage to shatter them anyways. theyre supposed to be like a puzzle. once the regular counterparts have some sort of epiphany about their flaws and themselves, the mirror counterparts have served their purpose and so shatter permanently

thats not to say the mirror counterparts arent their own people though... they dont have their own histories or world they came from (which causes some conflict with arthur later down the line) but the mir gsa are still very close with each other relationship-wise and have their own feelings on things going on. once they start shattering one by one, it becomes a sort of existential and moral crisis for people on both sides. is it worth it becoming a better person if that means one of you automatically dies? something something is it possible to escape one's own fate and purpose; the whole gang attempts to answer that question by attempting to get the remaining mirror counterparts somewhere where they can just live their life. but how i have it written right now is that all of them just shatter in the end and the regular counterparts come out of it with a great, but grim, appreciation for them, despite how much the mirrors initially antagonized them. and then they seal away the dimensional mirror so no one else, mirror or regular, needs to suffer the same fate

my friend keeps telling me thats really sad though, that the mirror counterparts just Dont get a happy ending and inherently cant. which... YEAH.... it works out as advancement of the regular counterparts characters just fine but its pretty unsatisfying to be like yeah they all die, its sad and the reg counterparts are traumatized but better people I Guess and then the mirror is sealed away like a game of fucking jumanji to be eventually dug up and have new people go through the same experience again. ill most likely rewrite some aspects of it because of that but thats how it is for now *jazz hands*

#asks #kittenvirus #my art #kirby right back at ya #krbay #meta knight #sir arthur #dark meta knight #yamikage #< heyyy first mention of him give it up for him #TYSM FOR THE ASK AGAIN 🥺

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jaemified · 10 months

Text

sunshine - kwon soonyoung

“you’ll always be my sunshine in the rain”

pairing; kwon soonyoung x fem!reader

genre; fluff, drama, unrequited love

warnings; minimal mention of drinking, soonyoung and reader get rained on in the middle

wordcount; 1.6k

synopsis; the one who stayed by your side no matter how many times you got fired from different jobs, tells you no matter the outcome, you’ll always be his sunshine in the rain.

read below the cut !

you had just been fired from your third job within a span of 7 months. not that you really did anything, you were always a competent employee, just the fact your overly.. energetic (to say the least) friend group would always seem to forget they are in public when they visit you. and once your boss found out they were yours, you paid the price no matter how much you tried.

“im sorry. i know it’s not you whos personally at fault, but we’ve been getting to many noise complaints from both owners next door. so we have to let you go, im really sorry again.” your boss, minnie, had told you before firing you from the bakery.

i mean, it made some sense that there would be noise complaints as the people next door were a tutoring company and a book store, but why would you have to be the one to take the blame?

at the end of the day, they were still your best friends, so you tried to see past it. but you really needed the money with rent due soon, not to mention the bills on top of all that. ‘i really might need to cancel my netflix and hulu subscription..’

you do have a roommate, sana, who you of course are close with, but with her being in law school, she was barely home.

of course she paid her share as she was pretty financially stable not to mention she still slept there (sorta) often, yet you never could ask her for money. though you went to high school and finished college together, it still felt weird asking for money.

so you sucked it up and went job hunting online, texting some of your (other) friends if they knew any available positions in the retail industry.

after 3 hours, you gave up. it was about 5pm now, and you had been rejected by around 15 different stores.

you decided to take a break to eat, and made a quick sandwich.

you scrolled through your phone mindlessly, before you received a notification from the one and only tiger lover (you really cringed when he told you to make that his contact name), soonyoung.

hoshi; r u ok

hoshi; srry me and kyeom got u fired

hoshi; picking u up

hoshi; dress nice

hoshi; jk u always do

hoshi; be there in 25

you sighed at his sad attempt to cheer you up. of course, him and seokmin were your best friends (among other things) yet you seriously had no idea how to move forward career wise.

you thought of just not telling them where you worked but they always found out one way or another.

even so, despite the desperate need for money you appreciated all soonyoung did for you. if he wasnt able to support you financially, he definitely always would mentally/emotionally.

with a heavy groan, you drag yourself off the couch to get dressed as you realized the minimal time you had left before he’d arrive.

you put on a yellow dress with yellow frill short sleeves, as well as a random pair of white sneakers before grabbing your bag and phone just as soonyoung texted he was parked outside.

“is that the dress i bought for you a while back?” he questioned while he backed out the parking lot.

“yeah. just never really had the chance to wear it since i was always working.”

“im sorry about that, again. i know you aren’t exactly the most financially stable but just know you can always come to me if you need-”

“soonyoung- weve been over this, i cant just ask you for money. i could never impose on you like that.”

“its not imposing if im the one offering it to you. but really, i don’t mind. im more then comfortable money wise right now.”

“only cause you live in cheols basement.”

“its not a basement- its a bedroom below the main floor. and josh literally has his own room on the same level as me! you know what thats besides the point. but you get what i mean!”

“yeah- you’re a group of 5 grown men living in a small technically one story plus a loft house with a.. not-basement because none of you wanna pay bills on your own.” you chuckled, rolling your eyes as you let the wind blow in your face through the crack in the window.

“hey! you’re saying that like we all don’t pay our own fair share.”

“whatever. where are we going anyway.”

“somewhere.”

“no way. are you kidnapping me?” you dramatically gasped, putting a hand over your chest.

“stop talking or im dropping you off at the nearest insane asylum.”

—

after a good 15 minutes of driving, you realized soonyoung had taken you to the old park you used to always visit together, recalling all the fond memories while the rushed back to you when you first stepped out onto the grass.

you noticed soonyoung taking a smallish basket out the trunk before you connected the dots it your head — he had taken you onto a picnic.

“you coming? this basket isnt getting any lighter.”

soonyoung had brought all sorts of your favorite comfort foods, ranging from strawberry shortcake, to tteokbokki, and even spam musubi.

as you took a bite out of your slice of cake, you let out a little gasp as a bee danced around your fork, before eventually flying to crawl over your dress.

you immediately stood up to shake it off you, sighing in relief as you saw it fly away (thanks to soonyoung swatting it but youre an independent person)

“you’re that freaked out over a small bug?”

“it was a bee! i dont want it to sting me or get in my cake.”

“it only stings you if you attack it first.”

“you’re lucky i didn’t attack you. why are all the bees coming towards me and not you anyway?”

“guess the bees know who the real flower is.” he smiled, before digging back into his own food like it was nothing.

your heart melted at the little comment, but it was expected from soonyoung. you shouldn’t get all worked up from something so usual/normalized, you told yourself.

but if it was so normal, why was your heart beating so fast?

“that was a little sudden. what was that all about?”

“oh that? yeah i like you.” he shrugged like it was nothing, the words rolling off his tongue so naturally as if he was responding to the most obvious question in the world. like, what color is the sky, or, how the hell do you respond to your super cute best friend that you find attractive, saying he likes you but he just got you fired thrice??

you felt the air being knocked out your lungs, absolutely speechless.

“i only said it so naturally cause i know you don’t feel the same, you know,” soonyoung mumbled, seemingly reading your mind. “just kinda needed to get it off my chest.”

“soonyoung..”

“no i get it. i mean i can’t expect you to love me especially ive been such a bad friend. i knew you were struggling and yet i still got you fired. from three different jobs.”

“im really sorry.”

“no need, if anything i should be sorry.”

“you know i still really care about you, right.”

“course you do, its only natural, anyway”. he forced a smile, though he wasn’t quite sure what else he expected.

though, he supposed a small part of him was holding onto something, wishing maybe you could’ve been a little more.

coincidentally, you began to feel small raindrops against your finger tips. you looked up to see the once bright blue sky had turned gray and gloomy.

“that’s weird.. I don’t remember seeing any rain in the forecast..”

soonyoung immediately packed up everything as soon as he could the moment he felt the rainfall coming down harder and faster.

by the time he was done, you both were pretty drenched.

he dug through the neatly packed basket to grab his black denim jacket to wrap around your shoulders as he guided the two of you to the car through the rapidly shifting winds.

soonyoung was meant to drop you off, but you invited him in. despite all his personal protests, he still went in anyway.

you poured yourselves some red wine, sitting on the floor by the warm fireplace after the cold rain soaked you both.

“i dont know if it’s the wine talking but you are really attractive, even if i don’t see you the way you see me.” you slightly slurred.

“well. you know what they say, drunk words are sober thoughts.” he awkwardly chuckled.

“im sorry.” you drunkenly mumbled, your head tipping over to fall onto soonyoungs shoulder.

he quickly took your wine glass to put onto the coffee table behind you in order to avoid staining the fluffy white carpet.

“what for?”

“i still really care about you.”

“well. you’ll always be my sunshine in the rain, even if it’s only ever just as friends.” soonyoung whispered to you, pulling his jacket tighter over your shoulders while you let yourself be absorbed by your own dreamland.

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meowzilla93 · 5 months

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The people need little known facts about Baxter! Just like random headcannons, like what's his favorite holiday and why, etc. etc. Basically please just tell me more about this silly little man :)

*cracks knuckles*

me? talk about my favourite love interest in OL:BA?

Thought you'd never ask :P

favourite holiday? we already know his favourite season is fall cause nostalgia, and I almost wanna think that eventually Thanksgiving is his holiday

you absolutely know why but if i must elaborate

he is just so damn thankful for being able to reconnect with people he truly cared for, and that those people didnt give up on him; if MC romanced him, all the more thankful he has someone he can trust and rely on for the rest of his life, and that he can provide that back

but it wasnt always and only after Step 4; he needs to reconnect first for this to eventuate

and you just know that he will love hosting and cooking; any excuse to learn new recipes and show off his skills

before step 4 though? i dont think he had one, and thats his parents fault

any sort of events like these he had to attend with his family and be the 'expected perfect son' which he loathed

i do believe this is canon (pls correct if wrong) but i truly do believe he did not have any friends at his private school, and actively hated going

rebel Baxter? he sure was in his own way

spare periods between classes; he wandered off grounds to a spot where he could avoid the pompous populace

talk back to teachers? you can guarantee that; just more in that incheek way where they couldnt really punish him for what he said

can see him being the type to screw around in class and just be a bit of a bother to the teachers and students, but he was an A+ student all the way

guarantee that when asked to answer questions in class, if he was in the right sort of mood, straight up makeup facts just for the lols

(his parents might have put a stop to that real quick though)

mans was a brat we know this, and it was making the OLNF friends that made him question his life and his upbringing more

this is a touch more sad, but i think early on, he didnt really understand his parents position on things like the LBGTQIA+ community and such until he saw people he cared about be treated poorly by them, or heard what they had to say behind closed doors

i think this truly broke him and is what started the rifts in his friendships as he didnt know how to approach this (he is a kid, we cant expect him to know)

but what he did know, he NEVER wanted to be like his parents, and this is when he started his plan on moving to Virginia for uni

ahem, lets get back to some light hearted sweet stuff

i recon he went full platinum white once - pure white hair (you cannot take this away from me) but the upkeep of that was more insane than just handling black

favourite flower! rose. come on. even Cove said it in Step 1: Fancy!

though if we must choose a second option, Lupine

it has that really pretty purple colour (his second favourite colour after black and white) and its symbolism is very much on par with what he truly wants from life

google that shit, and tell me im wrong

100% reads smut; Im talking like Victorian era smut (Johanna Linsday, Amanda Quick type stuff)

October is his favourite month - the world around him was covered in that beautiful auburn colour

He loves pumpkin spiced lattes (with oat milk of course)

PRESENTS! oh oh when its Christmas time, this is the hardest thing for him because he doesnt just wanna buy something random, it needs to have meaning

You wanted to go see a museum? here are some tickets

Missed this movie when it was screening? Here is the Extended Release with all the additions DVD

You have a favourite flower or plant that you can never really have cause it doesnt grow in the climate you live in? In a frame you received a pressed and dried version of it, so you can always have it with you

.....i need to stop otherwise ill just keep going

(pls dont stop asking me though, ill talk about Baxter till death and will make a million more posts)

#our life beginnings and always #baxter ward #olba #olba baxter #olba mc #our life #our life headcannons #headcannons #i will never get sick of talking about baxter

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the-banana-0verlord · 23 days

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Answer some or all I wanna know more about you 👁️👁️

Do you have freckles?

Do you drink tea or coffee? How do you take it?

What was the last song you listened to?

Do you sleep on your back, stomach or side?

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?

Do you prefer drawing or writing?

What’s your ideal number of blankets to sleep with?

What’s your favorite band/artist?

When is your birthday?

How tall are you?

What color are your eyes?

Who are five (or more) people you want to hug right now?

Fears?

What’s your favorite color?

What’s your favorite season?

Want any tattoos? What of?

Want any piercings? Where?

Who is the last person you texted?

Do you have a best friend? How long have you been friends?

What/who do you miss?

How was your day today?

How much sleep did you get last night?

Do you believe in aliens?

When was the last time you cried? Why?

What’s your favorite decade?

What are some seemingly childish things you like?

What’s your favorite book? Or just one you’ve read a few times?

How are you, really?

Does it take you a long time to make decisions?

What are you looking forward to in the near future?

What are you looking forward to in the distant future?

If you could go anywhere right now, where would you go?

Do you sleep with your door open or closed?

What’s your favorite flower?

Do you currently have a squish?

Do you like your middle name?

Do you prefer dogs or cats?

Do you have any phobias?

Do you stay up late?

Do you like the beach? Do you prefer it sunny or cloudy?

What’s your favorite cartoon?

Tag 5 of your favorite blogs

Do you have siblings? How many?

Who was the last person you said “I love you” to?

Is there anyone you would die for?

What do you need when you’re sad?

Have you memorized your phone number?

Who’s someone you can trust with your life?

What does your last text say?

Wild Card. Any question, ask away.

Alright, ill try lmao

1.no, i dont have freckles!

2. I WISHED i found Coffee and tea good because its so aesthetic but it tastes bad imo

3. I checked my spotify and its girls just wanna have fun by cyndi lauper so i suppose its that

4.i move a lot but i usually end up on my side.

5. I move too much to sleep with a lot of them because they always end up on the floor. Although i do sleep with my malleus plushie.

6. Thats a hard one, because i do both. Though i think of writing as my primary hobby/eventual job, i definitely have more fun drawing(until art Block comes knocking that is)

7.depends on the thickness. Right now i have three eith two being thin and one being medium, but i could sleep with one really thick one.

8. Mitski!!! I love her so much. Otherwise I like mother mother and marina

9.the third of november!

10. 154 cm or 5 feet. No that is not short

11. Blue-grey-kaki. I like to think of them as blue.

12. All my mutuals, all my irls, my mom, my dad, and my little sister

13. Abandonnent, failure, the future in general.

14. Yellow and light blue!

15.fall! Its so pretty

16. Im not sure yet but i can maybe have someday a small tattoo. Im not a fan of qhoel body tattoos for myself.

17. Well my ears a pierced but im not gonna get more.

18. My two irls! Talking about not getting neuvillette in gneshin ;-;(and murder)

19. I dont have a best friend per se, although i do have a closest friend. Weve been friends for at least three years(already? Damn)

20. Honestly i miss my first mutual on here. I hope they come back soon ;-;

21. It just started but its been pretty good up til now!

22. About 9-10 hours?

23. I mean, there is bound to be other forms of life in space, just thousands of lightyears away.

24. Monday cause my friend said she didnt think we were friends.

25. Id say 1890 to 1900? Though the living conditions were meh i like the aesthetic

26. Generally being silly ig? I suppose i act childihs as a comic relief.

27. Currently my favorite book(s) is the Truly Devious series by Maureen Johnson! It's been clawing it's way into my brain.

28. I'm actually doing quite fine. I'm a bit stressed since i'm going to boston soon but i can push out the bad thoughts!

29. I usually procrastinate decisions as far as possible. If it's a small one maybe like 2 minutes but if it's bigger ones it'll take longer(with the answer being no a lot)

30. Something i'm dreading but also am excited for is summer! Bye school but hello summer job ;-;

31. My irls and i(can i really call them irls? i met only two of them irl and once or twice. anyways-) are planning a roadtrip after we're all 18(aka in a bit more than 4 years)!

32. Either my friend's (irls+ moots) houses or in paris. I've always wanted to see paris.

33.open, my cats need to be free to walk in and out!

34. sunflowers and roses(i have a list on the meaning of each rose color) daisies are also cute.

35. i...guess? i own a banana shaped stress ball(that is very dirty i dont use it much) but idk if it counts as a squish.

36. yes, almost more than my first name. although my first and second name are kinda in the same name. it's like first name-second name.

37.cats!!! I have two(named chicken nugget and nebraska)(my family also owns dogs but oh well)

38. I'm a bit scared of heights but i wouldn't say i have a phobia

39. i usually go to sleep at 10:30 pm on weekdays, and 11:00-11:00 on weekends(when i don't have to wake up early due to sunday class)

40.Although i haven't been to a real beach a lot, i like it! And i always prefer sunny days so sun it is(to experience sunset on a beach... must be the dream)

41. I'd say the owl house! It's so colorful with two of my main kins.

42. @xen-blank @thehollowwriter @quartztwst @boopshoops @saionjeans (so sorry for the tag non-moots! Also i would've included all my moots but it said five ;-;)

43. Yes, i have five siblings! One oldest sister, two older brother, a little brother and the baby of the family, my little sister. i have middle child syndrome.

44. Either my mom or my little sister. I hug and say i love you to them very often. Or i said it to malleus last. One of them.

45. Tbh i have no idea in which circomstances i would die for something. maybe if i could trade my life with someone's close to me. or for peace on earth idk.

46. a big ol hug from my malleus plushie. it's a real emotional support.

47. no i have not. or maybe i did. i will probably forget it soon.

48. my two parents absolutely.

49."I wish to expérience it someday" (speaking of old lady gossip)

50. can i send you the same questions? :3

#ok now enough ramblings about myself #banana's moots #bananaanswersasks

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starz4valen · 4 months

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queers im fucking lost come save me

ok but in all seriousness,

despite labeling myself as aroace for a hot minute and finding comfort in that label and the community for a time—shit doesnt feel quite right anymore.

i have had ONE EX. one.

i genuinely think i was in love with him. i only felt what i felt with him,,,WITH HIM. nobody else. I felt the butterflies/giddiness, i loved his laugh, his smile, hearing him, his jokes, all the names he would call me, how much he said he loved me, our late night discord calls, having him around, just. him. when he rarely spoke abt shit that was bothering him it hurt me so bad, like i would hurt with him. and the mere THOUGHT of ME hurting him made me wanna sob.

as you can probably guess by the fact we’re exes, we’re not together anymore. it hurts. hell, my stomach tangled a bit as i typed that out. (could be cause recently someone who used to be a friend went and dated him and then got upset at me for getting upset at them but this ain't abt them.)

we broke up in like june last year, and i felt so fucking horrible about it bc it basically ended w him yelling at me over text at how horrible i am at listening and how i treated him more like a therapist—which i will admit i did. i sucked for that. it makes sense why tho, i was working through a lot of shit at the time, doesn’t justify it at all though. i should’ve treated him better. im desperately trying to fix it in my current relationships so that never happens again.

then again, he also treated me badly. he said things that really fucked with my sense of trust in people and just made me scared to get close with anyone like that ever again, or in general bc i was convinced everyone had some ulterior motive w me or secretly didnt give a shit abt me—but also i felt *I* was the problem. like every relationship im in is gonna end horribly bc im just that bad. its taken a lot to say that i feel loved by and trust my current friends, as well as trying to recognize that I deserve love, and im glad i can say that im getting better ^^

but,,,idk anymore

i concluded i was aroace almost a year after we broke up. there were a couple reasons. for one, i only really got that close w him. i dont really know if ive had a crush or what that feels like—in fact i think i faked one in elementary, the whole reason i got w my ex was bc he was flirting w me and it made me feel nice. (also bc i was worried he would be my only shot at love but i digress) i feel off when people talk about heading to poundtown or anything like that, the same with crushes—just crushes tho relationships i totally get—and i still struggle to wrap my head around attraction and how people just can look at someone without even knowing them at ALL and go “you. i want you.”

i wrote off how i felt when i was with him as simply some non-romantic form of attraction and called it a day.

but recently ive been reflecting on that, and i think i was wrong. the way that even now i get all these emotions by merely talking abt my ex says something. how upset seeing that "friend" going ahead and dating him after barely knowing him and just how angry i was says something. the way i cried seeing my best friend get a whole small crate of presents from their partner for their bday bc i was THAT JEALOUS says something. the way i yearn for affection and to be loved again says something. the way im starting to miss being in love again says something. the way i would always want some sort of relationship—even when i identified as aroace—but just never thought it would happen bc i didn't feel pretty enough, or mentally well enough, deserving of one, or like id ever be lucky enough to find someone who makes me feel that way again and how scared and sad that makes me,,,says something.

now in terms of poundtown—legit dunno. closest to that I've done w anyone was neck kisses from my ex, which i did really enjoy—but also i legit identified as ace like the whole time we were together and the few times he made jokes like that i felt uncomfy. plus the only way i feel i could be ok w going further w something like that is if its either excessively gentle or the most unserious thing ever. so tbh if i had to take a guess on how i feel abt that—not too keen on it.

I'm debating a couple labels, bi, aroace, bi and ace, demirose, and demirose and bi, but tbh i feel bi kinda fits the most? (maybe???) but also it doesn't. idk if its the fear of opening my mind to me being in a relationship despite my fear of intimacy and commitment or just that I'm aroace and this is my brain telling me to stop overthinking shit—but i know i wanna figure this shit out

if anyone has like legit any words of advice PLEASE send it my way. i will take even the tiniest crumb of guidance cause i am more lost than a child in ikea.

thanks to anyone who read all this <3

#queer #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #queer community #in need of advice #queer advice #aroace #aromantic #asexual #bisexual #questioning #help. me.#utterly confused 💥

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this-is-lightning · 10 months

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Supercorp FicRec P. 28

The next part in my ongoing ficrec series. I go through my bookmarks on AO3 and select the ones I like the best and add a little commentary on why. 5 fics per part. (under the cut)

Masterpost

give me mercy no more by searidings

kara and lena would go, have been, to hell and back for one another. but heaven? that's a whole different ball game.

w: 23,195

r: general audiences

S6 black mercy AU. Lex is there and plotting, they foil the plan of course and finally their feelings come to light. Short, intense, happy ending! Looots of feelings.

We Deserve Only Good Things by ThornedRose44

“Are you Lena?” The girl jolted in her spot on the sofa, hugging the bear closer to her chest. “Yes.” Even though Kara had known it from the second she had laid eyes on the child, the confirmation still managed to take her by surprise. “Who are you?” Lena asked, trying to sound as confident as she could. “Oh, my name’s Kara.” Kara replied warmly, taking a step forward, eager to move closer to offer reassurance before halting the second she saw the younger version of her once best friend flinch. “It’s okay,” Kara quickly soothed, “It’s okay. I won’t hurt you.” Lena peered over the top of her bear’s fuzzy head, “Promise?” Kara knelt down and smiled brightly, “Promise.”

Following Lex’s defeat, Kara and Lena are struggling to rebuild their friendship and let go of the hurt caused on both sides when Kara and Lena work together to help an alien return home. To show their gratitude for being saved the alien provides the two of them a chance to close the rift still between them. How? By getting them to meet each other's younger selves.

w: 28,678

r: mature

S6. Reconciliation is hard but they get help. Hits you right in the feels - and hard. SO well done, truly its a gem. Meeting little Kara and Lena was a real treat, wish we'd had more of that in the show. She writes them both so well and just knows how to cut them to the core. Brilliant!

something so precious about this (oh what a sin) by Just_As_Sane

Small folded pieces of paper begin to gather in her wallet. There’s swans, cute puppy faces with tiny noses drawn on them, various sized stars and there’s fish, frogs even a dinosaur.

But mostly there’s hearts.

She tries not to read too much into it.

Kara makes little origami creations and gives them to Lena, and Lena being the complete and utter sap that she is, loves them with all her heart.

w: 4,399

r: mature

I adore this one. Its so soft and sweet and comforting. All fluff, no angst. Definitely one of my go-to comfort fics. (and i am absolutely like this Lena when im in love lol)

What's gonna be left of the world if you're not in it? by ThornedRose44

If Lena didn’t know any better she would say she was being haunted. By an actual ghost. But Lena knew better. She had one of the highest IQ’s in the country. So Lena knew better.

THE JUST LIKE HEAVEN AU

w: 83,635

r: teen and up

This ones a lot funnier than it might sound. It gets a bit sad and sappy later, but that makes the story even better. Very happy ending (Kara is not actually dead). Also if you haven't already do check out all her fics. (tho i probably recd them all by now)

i love that i know you (like no one does) by robie

“Help me understand,” Kara says. “Are you saying everyone falls in love with their best friend?”

“I’m saying that queer women have a special affinity for it,” Lena repeats, fishing the cherry out of the bottom of her drink. “The whole ‘falling for your straight best friend’ is basically a rite of passage.”

“Says who?”

“Everyone.” She puts the cherry in her mouth, bites it off the stem. “The L Word was like, built on the premise that a friend group of queer woman in LA dated each other in some sort of terrible repeating circle for, god, however many seasons that went on. And it’s been my experience that when two people are attracted to each other, and they’re close, feelings are likely to develop.”

“That’s just, I mean, come on.” Kara’s cheeks are a little pink. “A trope and a tv show? That’s your evidence?”

“So you’ve never been in love with your best friend?” Lena looks down at her empty glass.

“No!” Kara sounds affronted. “No, I have never been in love with my best friend.”

A love story, told in three acts.

w: 47,367

r: mature

Sooo they totally fall in love of course, it just takes a while - cue jUsT fRiEndS shenanigans. Like so so many of them. Lots of pinging, a little angsty but eventually they stop being dumb. So so so well written.

Don't forget to leave some love for the writers! Happy reading!

#fic rec #supercorp fic rec #supercorp #28

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beesmygod · 1 year

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The hive works thing makes sense as it seems every comic artist affiliated with them has either become openly miserable and burnt out or pivoted towards ig style content creation ideology. Since they used to be so respected it’s sad but expected almost

Excited for your self publishing adventures though!

thank you for the well wishes! to be honest i am not sure what other peoples experience with the company is as it is difficult ask around for that sort of thing and to be honest i was not close or grew close enough to any new artists to be able to ask them that. i think your experience varies greatly based on your comic's performance.

ofc its going to be hard to talk about much of this without sounding like a little sour grapes bitch, but i think thats the price of trying to talk abt it at all. as far as im aware the operations of hive are pretty obfuscated to nearly everyone not immediately involved, so a little light on why it didnt work for me can at least shed a little insight from an uncommon source. but remember: i can only speculate to a reasonable degree based on my own experiences and because i have a uhhhh caustic writing style, i want to be sure to try to reign in my impulse for hyperbole. reader beware!!! you're in for boring dry answers.

well. sort of. one of the last things that blew me away was being told that laughing at the dork ass losers who use auto-tracing techniques on free clip studio assets caused them to pull some of their pitches from consideration. okay? how the fuck was i supposed to feel about this info?? some people who cant draw by admission and refuse to learn on purpose did you a favor by removing themselves from consideration. the mere idea of even being considered equitable to that gaggle of morons is too much lol. my newly and grossly inflated self-image cannot take this. thats too far lol. deeply insulting shit. that combined with the years and years of repeatedly being put on the backburner and having to nag myself hoarse to get anything done made it clear that respect, if it was ever involved in the first place, had narrowed to a one way street

a close friend of mine gave me some advice when i was asking around, but admitted they were having a hard time staying objective bc they were embittered by the change in hiveworks from what they perceived as an artist collective to a Brand(c). i hadnt even considered this view and was even more shocked to hear that multiple long time webcomic readers found out about hive through me. my perception of it from the inside was very odd and warped, i had a hard time coming to terms with realizing i was not getting what i was hoping for from the experience (comradery, support).

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demoiselettes · 1 year

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Can I get a Demon slayer match up!:)

I want a male character

Im a girl

So basically how I look physically , I wear bangs on my face and have a pony tail on the side with all my hair going down but sometimes I like having two buns or two pig tails cause I like looking cute. Im asian , 5,2. Black long hair , I like to wear scrunchies or hair bows and I like girly dresses , skirts and crop tops. Im have social anxiety , its very hard for me to make friends cause it scares me , Im artistic(I like to draw and sketch) and I like anime.

I like eatting candy and I like stuff toys so I guess you can say I am a bit childish.

Im a bit chubby cause I like eatting but its not noticable

Im introverted and Im not interested in talking to most people cause I find them boring but I have a close friend group , Im usually stand off-ish with people but if we are close I make a lot of dirty jokes and im very playful and light hearted but again half the time I will be introverted. I like deep conversations , talking about feelings and philosophical things and Im self conscious of how I look and im insecure but I dont tell anyone unless we are close. I like deep emotional connections , Im an INFP

I really like physical affection , I like PDA.

I'm idealistic and I day dream a lot about romance and etc but Im not a hopeless romantic.

I have an inner world in my mind.

I like helping my close friends out.

I don't like small talk.

I want to make friends but my anxiety is a lot

I get jealous of others a lot and I need to be nurtured

I want someone to focus on me than other people and don't forget im there when im around people cause in groups Im quiet.

I want someone to care about me and nurture my feelings a lot and I like feeling valued.

I make very lewd jokes and I make some other jokes others may laugh at or find me weird

I really like positive people because I look up to them and I think their cool but I want someone with emotional depth to talk about deep inner emotions

I can also tell when someones upset or sad simply because I can based off of body language.

I like being there for others even though sometimes I dont know what to do , im very emotionally nurturing , I like spending time with people I love a lot.

I also live in a fantasy world in my mind and I love music and I like making people see me as attractive or act playful and bubbly cause it boosts my self esteem and makes me feel hot

Sometimes I can be too quiet but it depends on my mood , I dislike most people cause I view them as "Normal"

I tend to procrastinate

Eventide

I match you with Uzui Tengen!

•You and Tengen share a really similar trait: you both tend to see most people as ‘normal’ or ‘drab’

•Tengen has the need to be flashy, and seeing people go about doing mundane tasks with no hint of extravagance

•The people close to Tengen: his wives, Kyojuro, etc.. all differ from others in an important way; they can be recognized everywhere from how.. ah, unusual they are

•And Tengen loves that! Therefore, you seeking people who are not..boring will be what draws him to you

•Tengen, by all means, has a huge sex appeal and definitely loves his dirty sense of humor

•He wouldn’t think twice before flirting with you, even if he’s in public

•Your playfulness is his weakness

•He can never get tired of retaliating when you’re in a playful mood and he will get touchy feely

•It’s even better once he finds out you’re fond of PDA

•He’ll just randomly pull you into his lap at times press kisses over your face

•If he finds out that you think of romance a ton, he’ll take it as a personal challenge to live up to your daydreams and standards

•Whatever you envision, whether it be a date, a gift or something else, he’s on his way to make that mere thought a reality, in double flashiness

•Tengen isn’t really a big fan of emotional or deep conversations

•This doesn’t equal to him being shallow, he simply doesn’t find it fun to dive into deep subjects

•But you’d be surprised at how understanding he can be, specially to those he cares for

•When you’re in the mood to take a deep dive down philosophy lane, he’ll be there to listen and to share his own views

•Like you, Tengen isn’t the type to value small talks

•His conversations need to spark interest and to really get people listening

•Safe to say, he’s rarely ever quiet around you

•Even if you’re not in the mood to talk, he’s gonna be having a one sided discussion and asking you rhetorical questions

•Tengen basically showers you in affection and attention

•Even when you’re not with him, he talks about you to others just to show you off

•In his mind, you’re the embodiment of a goddess and he isn’t afraid to remind you of how amazing you are everytime

•No, i mean, he’s gonna pop up with a compliment at the most random moments

•Your need to appear bubbly and all in all attractive matched Tengen’s need to be the centre of attention, but he knows it can get exhausting at times, and he isn’t shy to tell you not to overdo it

•He didn’t just fall in love with your flashiness, he fell in love with you

•Tengen is an all round extrovert, so it’s easy for him to be surrounded by people and making friends is a natural thing to him

•So you being anxious when it comes to making friends is a new concept to him

•He doesn’t judge though(he lightly teases you about it, but will most likely stop if you seem uncomfortable), he will try to get you out of your shell to become a natural at making friends

•It doesn’t matter how long it takes, if he finds that you want to make more friends, he’ll help

•Ooooo boy, your chubbiness..

•He loves it

•Expect him to pinch your cheeks, your sides, your butt..

•He basically loves having you squished to his side

•Aside from scouring the best hot springs with you, he likes to take you to watch live amezaiku candy sculpting

•Then he buys their entire stock for you

•Your artworks decorate the halls of his estate

•Tengen loves how much shorter you are compared to him, and his favorite thing to do is picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder

•And smacking you as-

•Since we’re in the Taisho Era here, he’s getting you the same types of kimonos Hinatsuru, Makio and Suma wear and the he stares and whistles your way

•Giving head pats is his thing, and he likes to ruffle your hair, sometimes playing with your twin buns while he’s at it

•You also get the privilege to paint his face and nails, he lets you experiment with new designs from time to time

•He really only lets you because he gets to have you on his lap and to ogle you the entire time

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #nan’s eventide.#tengen uzui matchup

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narrators-journal · 1 year

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Can I get a hunter x hunter match up!:)