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cal-puddies · 2 years

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Think of You Later in my Empty Room// Calum Hood

Hello friends! It's been an absolute dream getting to co-write with Crystal again - it's been far too long! There's not much to intro here - as we mentioned, this series originated with us daydreaming about lighting up and getting down with our guys and for Cal, a lazy day at home seemed so natural, and its me so we made it a lil emo for ya.

I hope you checked out @kindahoping4forever's blog for Hit of Dopamine, Higher Than I've Ever Been, which is the Ash installment, and you'll want to go back and check out the verifiably unhinged Luke part tomorrow.

Warnings: Boyfriend!Cal, angsty!girlfriend worried about missing him when he leaves again. significant use of weed, high sex, oral sex, anal play, cum play, dirty talk containing strong language

Word Count: 6260

I Hope You Think Of Me High Series Masterlist

Crystal Masterlist // Cass Masterlist // Ko-Fis linked in our bios

Reblogs and feedback are greatly appreciated!

It’s a lazy afternoon in bed, in the middle of a lazy day in the midst of a lazy week. Calum’s fingers tangle in your hair as you lay in his lap and you giggle softly as you look up at him, eyes warning him to be careful but also asking him not to stop touching you.

You hum contentedly to the softly playing playlist in the background, feeling your boyfriend’s eyes fixate on you as you stretch out in one of his favorite t-shirts. Your gaze happens upon his packed luggage by the door, a silent reminder of the topic you’ve both been trying to ignore, and you try not to let your face fall but judging by the sigh he lets out, he definitely noticed.

“We can talk about it if you want,” he offers.

“I don’t want,” you say stubbornly. “Anything outside of this room, outside of this bed doesn’t exist to me right now.”

He chuckles, smoothing his hand over the top of your head. “Baby… it’s only gonna be a couple of weeks. And then you’ll be on the road with me.”

You pout, “You just got home.”

“I know, love. And we’ve had a great week together, haven’t we?” You stay quiet, not ready to concede your point, so he continues. “We both knew the schedule when the tour got planned, a week to recharge between legs… knew it wasn’t gonna be easy.”

You sigh, “Cal, I can understand it and accept it and still be sad about it. I’ve just now gotten used to you being here again… I like having you here to talk to, to share things with… just to get a hug when I need one…”

“I miss those things when I’m away, too,” he reminds you, pulling your hands to his lips so he can kiss your wrists. He grins brightly, trying to cheer you up. “But it’s only a couple weeks until you get that time off and you can join me… I’m very glad your passport finally came.”

You can’t help but reach up to caress his raised cheeks. “Yeah… I’m looking forward to it. Really,” you admit, smiling back at him. “So much to do before then, though. Gotta get all my stuff together, all the stuff you’re definitely gonna forget to pack and want me to bring out with me.” You giggle at your own joke and giggle even louder at his pouty reaction to it.

“I know you’re teasing me but we should actually start seeing what all you wanna bring so we know whether or not we need to buy you a bigger suitcase,” he points out.

“So the rest of the week is gonna be busy is what you’re saying.”

“Yes, which is why we’re doing this today,” he says matter of factly, grabbing the bong off the bedside table, gesturing for you to pass him the lighter you’ve been fidgeting with. You toss it to him and sit up against the headboard next to him, watching lovingly as he repacks the bowl from your morning smoke session.

Ever the gentleman, Calum offers it to you first, paying close attention as you position yourself over the mouthpiece, waiting for your cue to light the bowl. You end up taking a pretty good hit and he grins at you as he clears the chamber for himself. You watch his nimble fingers wrap around the bong, gracefully lighting up and tucking the lighter into his palm as he removes the slide, inhaling a large hit and dramatically throwing his head back to blow it out.

You bite your lip, watching him reset for a second hit; his eyes are on you, watching you watch him, noticing your eye line is mostly on his fingers. He inhales and then pulls you in, first to shotgun the hit to you and then to slot your lips together for a kiss after you blow out the smoke. He offers you the bong and when you decline, he uses it once more himself before setting it back on the nightstand.

“C’mere,” he murmurs, patting his thigh. You climb up to straddle him, wrapping your arms around him, nuzzling your face into his neck. You let out a soft sigh as his hands rub up and down your bare thighs, eventually nudging your shirt up over your hips so he can give your ass a tight squeeze. He raises his eyebrows, surprised. “Forgot you’re not wearing panties,” he chuckles.

You smirk and kiss his neck. “What’s the point? You’re just gonna take ‘em off me anyway.”

“I like you naked… I like being naked with you too, is that so wrong?”

“Nah… you know I like our naked bods pressed together too.”

He shrugs. “They don’t even need to be pressed together… I just prefer ya naked.” He tugs the back of your shirt and you lean back, lifting your arms up so he can pull it off. His fingers trail over your skin as he removes your top and you shiver. “Love the way your body responds to my touch… spent weeks getting off to the thought of touching you again.” He drags his fingers across the tops of your breasts, along your collarbone, down your side and across your tummy as he whispers. Your body lets him know how much you love it by raising goosebumps over your skin and your nipples hardening.

You thread your fingers into Cal’s hair as he leans in to kiss on your neck, his stubble prickling your skin. He leans you back to allow himself more access to your body and he immediately takes advantage by wrapping his lips around one of your nipples. He rolls the other between his fingers and palms your breast, and switches, lavishing his tongue over the other side.

You gently scratch at his scalp and he looks up at you, sleepy, red eyes telling you how high he is. He grins before putting his attention back on your tits, sucking marks onto them before pressing a gentle kiss to each one and then kissing back up your neck. He engages you in a slow, sensual make out. His hands feel like they’re everywhere at once, all over your body while yours travel into his boxer to squeeze his ass. He eagerly shimmies them off, sitting up on his knees to toss them aside. “You’re so gorgeous, baby, never get tired of looking at you,” he coos, intertwining your fingers.

“Me? Look at you, bubba,” you sigh, looking him up and down, realizing how hard he is.

He takes your hand in his and moves them both toward his body, cupping his cock with his and your hand. “This is all you baby, you do this. Every damn time,” he explains. You bite your lip, keeping eye contact with him as he moves your hands, swiping his fingertips through your folds. “And I love that I do this to you,” he murmurs, holding up his wet fingers. He sticks them in his mouth and your chilled out brain is still processing that image when he starts moving much quicker than he has all day.

He grabs the super soft blanket from the foot of the bed and quickly shakes it out as he lays next to you again. You both watch, stoned minds fascinated, as the material balloons and flutters back down to cover your bodies, “Your favorite,” he mumbles sweetly, kissing your forehead before turning onto his side so he can drape his arm across your stomach and pull you in close against his chest.

The two of you snuggle together, alternating between whispering sweet nothings to each other and dozing off. Naturally, things eventually evolve into another sweet make out session and you can’t get enough of the slow, unrushed indulgence.

Cal enjoys touching you as much as you enjoy him touching you, which makes everything so much better. He softly moans, appreciating your body’s reactions to him, just like he mentioned. You lean in as he presses gentle kisses to your neck and sigh his name.

“Need you, sweet girl,” he rasps in your ear.

You rub your fingertips against his stubble and nod. “Yeah… need you too, handsome.”

He smooths his hand down your side, pushing his thigh between yours, moving his hand from your hip to your pussy to help him guide his cock in. Your breath hitches in your throat and your jaw falls slack. On a good day, he’s a tight fit, but when you’re high, you feel it extra. “Fuck,” you whimper as he sinks all the way in.

Concern colors his voice as he groans, “You alright, darlin’?” You nod, squeezing your eyes shut, breathing through the stretch. You turn your head towards him, looking for a kiss and his tongue is quickly in your mouth, trying to soothe you. He’s ready to reach for lube when you finally relax into him. “That’s good, baby,” he praises you.

Calum stays unmoving, buried in you, giving you more time to adjust and himself more time to strategize. If he thrusts into you, he knows it’ll feel too good and he’ll have trouble keeping things at a slow pace, which is not only the vibe of the day but something you clearly need. But if you move against him, he knows he’ll cum almost instantly and neither of you will get to enjoy the experience. You’ve been high with him enough times to recognize his dilemma and you offer a simple solution. “Just lay here with me, bubba,” you suggest. You add with a dreamy sigh, “Feel so good inside me.” Your eyelids are heavy as you turn to look at him, nipping at his nose before parting your lips for a kiss. He happily obliges and the two of you are soon caught up in an endless loop of soft open mouth kisses with curious tongues, while your fingers dance across each other’s skin, your bodies still intimately connected.

Your boyfriend is fully entranced with you and he wants more. One hand caresses your thigh while the other gently cups your tits, softly teasing your nipples. He groans softly into your mouth when his fingertips move over to your clit, gently at first. He feels how turned on you are and decides to add a little more pressure,and you moan quietly.

“You’re so wet, little darlin’.”

“How am I not supposed to be?”

He grins as you arch your back into him. “You know I love you this way… open, wet… love you high because everything feels so good to you and with you.”

“Caaaaal… oh… like that… please?”

“F’course darlin’.” He keeps sliding his fingers up and down your clit, varying it with circles every so often. You gasp at the sensations he’s given and your breath shift makes your pussy throb around him. “Ohhh…” Cal moans with you. “Mmm… baby, I think this is working for both of us.”

“It’s definitely working for me,” you pant, moving against him.

“You really like when I do this,” he mutters, sliding his fingers across your clit. “Your cunt squeezes so good…”

You moan at the action and his words, clawing at his arm with one hand, your other covering his at your tits. He lets you intertwine your fingers there and he holds you while he nibbles your neck and sucks your earlobe, all his cock still fills you, his hand working between your legs. He could not be more all over you than he is right now and you’re feeling completely overwhelmed by his attention.

His name spills from your lips over and over, he is the only thing you really know or care to know in this moment. You start pulling at his arm, trying to get him to stop rubbing your clit, even though you can’t put the words together. You turn your head toward him, softly whining, “Please, Cal… feels so good… don’t wanna cum yet.”

He slows his fingers down, speaking softly to you. “Ok, sweet girl, I can be patient if you can.” He holds his wet fingers to your mouth and you clean them, licking and sucking at them. “Sweet, sweet girl,” he murmurs, smiling at you. He wraps his arms around you possessively and the two of you lay cuddled.

You take a deep breath, closing your eyes to immerse yourself in all of your senses. Unsurprisingly, they’re being dominated by the love and comfort you find in Cal. You take in his scent, which is always calming to you. His even breathing in your ear, his little loving whispers, his soft lips against your neck. You run your fingertips over his arms, softly humming in response to his presence. Everything seems to be moving slowly in your hazy, lovestruck mind so you’re not sure how long the two of you have been laying here but you wish it could go on forever.

“Calum… bubba,” you sigh quietly. “I love you… I love you and I love being full of you…”

He gently thrusts his hips in response, whispering in your ear, “And I love filling you, darlin’… And I love you. My best girl.”

You reach one hand back and thread your fingers in his hair. “Think I’m ready to cum for you, handsome.”

Calum uses one hand to pull you into a kiss, the other finding its way back to your clit. You immediately arch against him and he takes the opportunity to cover your face, neck and shoulder with wet kisses, groaning into your skin as he goes. Overwhelming you again.

The orgasm shouldn’t be a surprise but it feels like it comes on suddenly and it’s incredibly intense. You whimper and whine as you tighten around him and he’s sensitive enough from the weed that it makes him cum too. “Oh my god, Cal,” you breathe as you feel his cum spilling into you. Your nails dig in anywhere you can reach and you bite his arm where it holds you across your shoulders.

“That’s my sweet girl,” he huffs. “Always so good to me, shoulda known you’d make me cum like that.” He gently nibbles along your jaw.

“So good, love,” you murmur, turning into him for a kiss.

You lay wrapped up in each other for a while but you both get a little restless as the high starts to wear off. “Should get you cleaned up darlin,” he remarks. You clench around him as he pulls out and you close your eyes, giggling at the loud groan he lets out at how good it feels. You expect to feel the bed shift from him getting up to head to the bathroom but it never does and you turn over to see what he’s up to.

You find him digging through the bedside table, finally pulling out a baggie of pre-rolled joints. He lights one and takes one, two puffs before passing it to you. He watches you finish a hit before he’s pushing your thighs apart and settling between them. He leans back up for a quick kiss and to grab the joint from you, taking another hit before placing it back between your lips.

“I love seeing you like this… open… messy, my cum dripping out of you,” he groans. His fingertips slide through your folds and he licks the mess of his release off of them. You moan and put one arm behind you to prop you up so you can enjoy the show. You love when he gets like this. His tongue slicks through your folds, immediately teasing your entrance. “I never get tired of the way we taste together.”

You use one hand to lift the joint to and from your lips, the other stays threaded into Cal’s hair as you watch him noisily eat his cum out of you. After a certain point it’s obvious he’s moved beyond the task of cleaning you and he’s now just enjoying your body. He moans into you, nips at your thighs, holding them tight to leave marks, sucking hickeys as he goes. He sucks a particularly large one onto your hip while his thumb rubs your clit and you hear the pop when he pulls off. You blow out a smoke ring as you feel the stirrings of another potential orgasm and you wonder what you ever did to get this lucky.

Calum uses his head to gesture toward you as one hand is occupied kneading your ass, and the other is still playing with your clit. “Can I get that last hit, baby?” You take the cigarette from your own lips and stick it between his. Looking down at Cal, plump lips glistening, red and swollen from eating you out, killing a joint while still between your legs - you’re confident it’s the most erotic thing you’ve ever seen. You offer him the ashtray from the bedside table and he coolly tosses the finished joint in it before blowing his smoke at your pussy. “You ready to cum for me again?”

“Jesus, Cal… make me cum for you.”

His lips quickly wrap back around your clit and your fingers make a mess of his hair as he holds onto you tightly. His tongue makes quick, precise work of your clit and your reinvigorated high has you feeling overwhelmed once again. All of your senses are screaming Cal and only Cal.

He pulls your thighs over his shoulders, intertwining your fingers as he decides to start working his tongue inside you, instead of just playing with your clit.

“Holy fuck… Cal… please please please.” You whimper, panting out his name over and over.

“That’s my girl,” he hums, grinning against you. He works his tongue back in, as deep as he can and you buck your hips against his face. He teases, “Needy, darlin’?”

You chant his name, hips meeting every flick of his tongue. He’s both amused and turned on based on the giggles and groans he’s filling you with. He starts humming and ultimately that’s what sets you off. You swear you’ve never moaned louder in your life as you crash over the edge, hips grinding wildly against his face. Cal withdraws his tongue but slowly licks over your clit, bringing you down in a slow way. He lets go of your hands and grabs your hip, rubbing his thumb there reassuringly. You reach out, searching for his other hand, but it quickly registers that he’s using it to slowly stroke his cock.

He notices you’ve gone uncharacteristically silent as he quickly licks and cleans your second orgasm and when he pulls back to look up at you, he finds you with your face buried in your hands.

“What’s goin’ on, sweet girl?” He asks softly, gently pulling your wrists so you’ll uncover your face.

You stare at him, pink chubby cheeks all pink and sweaty, plump lips all red and swollen, a sweet look of concern coloring his expression. “Just… overwhelmed, I think,” you admit.

He settles in next to you, leaning down to peck your lips. “Wanna talk about it?”

You tuck a hand in his curls, smiling at him wistfully. “I’m not sure there’s much to talk about, Cal… I just feel so much for you… all this love and the emotion…” You trail off, trying to gather your thoughts, figure out how to articulate the lump in your throat. “Having all of your attention these past couple days… it’s just been so wonderful. You’re so wonderful. Make me feel so safe and loved. Known. And I think… I need to try and figure out how to comprehend… like… that’s all going away in a couple of days. I don’t know if you know, Cal… but I had a really tough time these past couple months without you. And now we’re going right back into that. You weren’t home long enough.”

Calum takes a long, deep breath, holding your gaze. You can tell he feels bad that you’re hurting and that it makes him feel even worse that he’s the cause and there’s nothing he can do about it. Fighting the frown that threatens to cloud his features, he gives you a soft smile and starts pressing kisses to your face. “I agree with you, love… I wish I was able to be here longer too. Feel like we were just getting back in the swing of things and now I have to go away again,” he shrugs. He squeezes your hand reassuringly. “But I promise you, ‘all of this’ isn’t going away baby. We’re gonna be back together again before you know it. And you know I’m always just a phone call or a FaceTime away. Even when we’re apart, I’m always there for you and you’re always there for me. That part doesn’t change.”

You nod, chewing your lip. You almost feel embarrassed at your outburst. It’s not like you didn’t know things would be like this when you started dating him. “I know, bubba… I didn’t mean to make it seem like you’re abandoning me or anything. I know you’d do anything for me, no matter where you are. I’m sorry.”

He does a double take, looking at you incredulously. “Sorry? Sorry for what?”

“I don’t want to make you feel bad about leaving. I want you to go on tour, I want you and the band to be successful enough so that you have to leave like this. You’re just doing what you love and I want that for you.”

He sighs, lifting your hand to his lips. “Baby, I also love you. And you’re just feeling your feelings. And all the feelings you just shared with me are completely valid. This is a lot to process. It’s a hard transition from being together all the time to not getting to see each other, especially since this is new for us.”

You give him a sad smile. “Are you about to tell me it gets easier?”

Calum rubs over your arm, grinning. “Oh, definitely not, darlin’, this part’s always gonna be torture,” he chuckles. “We’ll get better about dealing with it, though, I think. ‘Specially if we keep talking about it like this.”

You squeeze his hand on your arm. “Yeah, that’s true.”

“Thank you for being honest. Know it’s hard with me sometimes. But I’m glad you told me how you felt.”

You run your hand through his curls and lean in, needing to feel his lips on yours. He pulls you closer and you feel his still semi hard cock brush your stomach. You stay engaged in the kiss but let your hand wander down his body, wrapping around his length. He hums in response to your touch but after a few strokes, he reaches down to stop you.

“I’m OK, sweet girl. Let’s get up and get some food, maybe some sunshine,” he insists, moving your hand away from his body and interlacing your fingers. Your face must display your confusion because he chuckles as he kisses your knuckles before pushing up off the bed and crossing the room to the dresser. He smiles warmly as he tosses you a clean t-shirt and pulls out a pair of shorts for himself. “You’ve given me so much this week, darlin’, think it’s OK if we say you owe me one.”

You follow Cal into the kitchen where he sets to work making a couple sandwiches and cutting up some fruit; you make yourself useful by pouring two tall glasses of ice water and grabbing the lighter, pipe and weed jar off the kitchen counter to take outside. The two of you set everything up on the table in the shade and just as you’re about to take your seat, you feel his hands around your waist, pulling you into his lap. You relax against him while the two of you eat and you can tell he’s doing his best to comfort you in light of the conversation you just had. His arm rests across your lap, he presses soft kisses to your jaw and cheek, his hands shower you in affection, never leaving your skin.

“Sweet girl?” He murmurs into your ear after the meal is over. You cock your head to indicate you’re paying attention and he brings the jar of weed around to your line of vision, shaking it. “You wanna smoke this with me? Should be a little bit more of a mellow vibe than what we had earlier.”

Mellow definitely sounds good to you right now, so you nod and turn to so you can watch his hands work, carefully packing the bowl. You bite your lip and squeeze your thighs together, enjoying the show. You still feel a bit overwhelmed from earlier but after witnessing how thoughtful and attentive he was in navigating your emotions, how willing he was to talk things out with you, you’ve felt the sadness dissipating and instead be replaced by a need to be close to him, to show him your appreciation.

Calum must be feeling similarly because midway through his task, he turns and quickly draws you into a hungry kiss before nuzzling his nose to yours. “What a perfect way to close out such a lovely day with my girl,” he murmurs, running his hand up your thigh.

You brush his hair back, letting your hand fall to his neck and then chest. You play innocent, though you know exactly what rubbing your thumb over his nipple will do. You watch as his eyes close and his lips part, letting out a soft moan. “You’re so good to me, Cal,” you coo, leaning in to kiss his neck, sucking a mark onto his collarbone. He would typically stop you but it feels too good and he loves you too much right now for him to care.

The pipe lays forgotten on the table as your kisses trail lower, allowing your tongue to poke out and tease his other nipple. His hand comes down to hold the back of your neck as you tease him and you groan against his skin when you feel his cock twitch in his shorts. His fingertips run up your thighs, bunching your t-shirt at your hips as his touch continues the journey up your stomach and ribs, then gently over your breasts and nipples and back again.

After a few more minutes of this, he gently nibbles your earlobe and tugs at the hem of your shirt. “Can I take this off?”

You lean into his ear to whisper, “Can I ask for something in return?”

“Anything.” He says earnestly, tongue sliding over your lips before kissing them.

You look into his eyes. “Fill me?” You ask, reaching down to squeeze the tent forming in his shorts.

He lifts his hips with you still on him, kicking his shorts off and giving himself a few pumps to get fully hard. His fingers run up your thighs, ready to pull off your underwear but he laughs heartily when he realizes there’s nothing there.

“Still no panties?”

“Still no point,” you smirk, turning back around in his lap and lowering yourself down on his cock.

Cal hastily discards your shirt, burying his face in your bare shoulders as you continue to sink down on him. You let out a breathy sigh, wiggling your hips to get him bottomed out and your efforts are met with a low growl from him.

You gently turn his head toward you, giving him a heated kiss, finishing off by sucking his bottom lip. As you turn and press your back into his chest, his hands come around to cup your tits and he plays with your nipples, “I love the way you feel in me,” you sigh.

“I love the way you feel around me, baby. Tight, warm, wet… absolute perfect fit.”

You use his thighs for leverage as you push yourself up until just his tip is at your entrance and then you sink down as slow as you can possibly manage, intending to feel every vein and ridge of his cock. He pulls you back into a sloppy kiss and he’s practically shaking from the sensations you’re giving him.

“You OK, handsome?” You ask, teasing lilt in your voice.

“Do that again.”

You repeat your actions and he chokes on his moan. He settles his hands on your hips and though you expect him to try to get you to move faster, his grip just squeezes your skin as he sits back and lets you control the pace, groaning as he watches you take him over and over again.

“That’s it, baby… just like that,” he praises, head lulling back, closing his eyes to appreciate your slow work.

Your brow furrows in concentration as you move over him, thighs burning from going so slow but it feels so fucking good and he sounds so fucking good, you know the memory will be worth the pain later. You feel him lean in to cup your tits, giving them a nice squeeze before he turns your face towards his again, slotting your lips together.

His hand starts to drift between your legs but you bat it away, groaning, “Cal… let me do this, baby, let me make us feel good.”

He curses under his breath but obliges, leaning back to let you move freely. He goes quiet and you smirk to yourself, knowing he’s probably become hypnotized watching your ass jiggle and bounce as you ride him. You speed up just a little, trying to give him a bit more of a show, and sure enough you hear his breathing get heavier and feel a hand stroke down your skin, making a home for itself on the small of your back, wanting to touch you but also not wanting to obscure his view.

“Goddamn, darlin’...” He breathes, voice raspy and ragged. “Look so fuckin’ good riding me… don’t know why we don’t do it like this more often.”

You toss him a teasing look over your shoulder. “Because you’re a sweet boy who loves to kiss and look into your lover’s eyes… also the combo of staring at my ass and watching your cock disappear usually makes you cum pretty quick.”

Cal laughs loudly, “If you were seeing what I’m seeing, you’d be a lot closer to losing control too, baby.”

He groans loudly as you slow down again, rolling your hips extra slow so he can get a good look at your body engulfing him. “Well, next time we’ll have to make arrangements for that,” you tease, biting your lip as the possibilities run through your mind.

“Lotta things we’ll have to get to next time,” he teases back, letting his hand slide from your back to between your cheeks, fingers grazing your rim. He chuckles darkly at the way your body instinctively responds, how you fall forward, your back arching, your ass making itself more accessible to him. He loves that your body is asking him to continue but he wants to hear you say it so he plays dumb and asks, “Oh?”

“Yeah… please” is all you can manage but it’s all the prompting he needs. He sucks his thumb into his mouth and the wet noises of him coating it in spit, the loud pop when he releases it causing you to shiver in anticipation. You raise your hips, stilling your movements, holding your breath as you feel his hands on your backside again. He squeezes and massages your cheeks before spreading them and pressing his thumb against your hole. “Yesssss… Caaaal,” you sigh, overcome by the contrast of the dull pressure of his finger pushing inside you while his other four offer feather light reassurance just above the intrusion.

He groans as he prods further, getting lost in your breathy reactions and the bliss of watching your body accept even more of him. “Come on, little darlin’,” he rasps, squeezing your hip with his free hand. “Gonna keep movin’ for me?"

You whimper as you resume riding him, doing your best to set a new and effective pace even though you’re feeling completely overwhelmed by the knowledge Calum is filling both of your holes. His noises blend with yours, the two of you moaning together, you reacting to the deliciously full feeling he’s giving you, Cal doing his best to keep in control despite the fact that your ass looks unreal taking everything he’s giving you, that he’s feeling friction from his thumb on his cock and it’s bringing him closer to the edge than he’s ready for.

“Fuck, darlin’... can’t tell you how this looks… feels… gonna be thinkin’ about this every fuckin’ night when I’m gone,” he pants, a sense of relief washing over him when he hears the tone of your whines and recognizes that you’re about to finish as well. “So good… so fucking good, baby.”

You speed up, grabbing your tits, grinding down, chasing your orgasm, undecided whether focusing on the stimulation in your ass or your pussy is going to get you there fastest. Your body makes that call for you, deciding that Cal’s soft groans of encouragement are more than enough reason for you to cum. Your legs shake and you cry his name as your walls pulse around him, your third orgasm of the afternoon hitting you harder than you expected.

Calum thrusts gently up into you, happy to give you recovery time if you need it but also more than ready to follow you over the edge. You feel his hips start to stutter and you know you only have a limited amount of time to direct him. You quickly jut your backside out as much as you can and look behind you to tell him, “Cum on my ass, Cal… give us both something to think about while you’re gone.”

Another strained “Fuck” and a groan of your name are all he has time to respond with because your request has him immediately pulling out and pressing his cock to your cheeks without a second to spare. He struggles to keep his eyes open to take in the sight of his cum spilling onto your ass but as you moan at the feeling of his warmth coating your skin, he has to screw his eyes shut and vocalize with you. He gives himself a squeeze, milking out the last few drops before letting out an exhausted sigh and falling back against the chair.

He reaches over to the table, blindly searching for the napkins from lunch, finally finding them and quickly cleaning your messy skin. He squeezes your ass, massaging it more as he leans forward and presses kisses along your spine before wrapping his arms around your ribs so he can pull you back against him. He presses his face against your neck, still trying to catch his breath.

“You OK, bubba?” You chuckle, squeezing your arms on his.

“You’re too good to me,” he murmurs against your neck, inhaling deeply and pressing a few soft kisses to the back of your neck and shoulders.

“I just give what I get, love.”

The two of you sit quietly, naked and relaxing against each other, basking in the sun and the bond you’re feeling. You can tell your boyfriend is starting to doze off and you know if he goes, you’ll end up nodding off as well. “Let’s go back to bed, bubba,” you suggest. “That soft blanket and mellow weed are calling our names.”

You whine as you stand and stretch, hurting in all the best ways. Calum watches your every move and if you couldn’t feel his eyes on you, when you turn to look at him, the loved up grin on his face gives him away. You grab the pipe while he swipes up the discarded clothes and you wrap your arms around his middle as you walk back inside.

Back in the bedroom, you settle in against the headboard once more. You lean your head on Cal’s shoulder as he lights the pipe, smoke billowing around you. His suitcase is still by the door, staring you down, but it doesn’t seem quite as confrontational as it did a few hours ago.

"I'm gonna miss you," you say plainly. You peck his shoulder as you take the pipe from him. "I think I can be OK with that, though."

"Oh yeah?" He squeezes your thigh, lighting the bowl for you. He jokes, "What changed your mind, all the sex or all the drugs?"

You giggle, elbowing him as you blow your smoke out. "I just think days like today will make all the ones we have to spend apart a little bit easier… gives us something to remember, something to look forward to."

"That's true, that's a good point," Calum agrees, setting the pipe on the table and pulling you into an embrace. "Wouldn't be special if these days happened all the time."

"Yeah…" You agree wistfully. "Still gonna have one of these days when I come visit you though, right?"

Cal nods emphatically. "Baby, you're flying in on a day off and I'll tell you something right now, very first thing, the panties are coming off and not going back on for at least that entire day," he declares with a naughty grin.

You relax against him, missing him already but taking comfort in making plans and sharing jokes. "See, bubba, you're learning," you tease. "What would be the point?"

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nikki-is-a-nerd · 3 months

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Since The Percy Jackson s1 is done, i can now write my overall experience with it. Mind you i only read the first book of PJO because I couldn’t afford the books and because goddamn borrowing it from the university library was like a pack of coyotes seeing a slab of meat after 15 years of starvation.

(Side note: i once got scratched in the face by a girl who wanted to read Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief, when i was gonna borrow the book for a second time. I learned it was better to just buy the books one by one per year.)

So i fully enjoyed the series. Regardless of how a lot of people have been calling it shit or a disgrace to the books. Like I appreciate how Uncle Rick managed to retell his own story, see it come to life, in a way that he wants. I appreciate Sally Jackson having a bigger impact to how Percy is as a person and as a character.

Yes, i too was shocked with the grover snitch scene in ep 1, then I thought about it, it made sense. Grover is my favorite character and i would like to say that the movie version of Grover made me feel uneasy but this version of grover, he made me long for that kind of friendship. I also love how Grover unlike in the movies, isn’t comic relief. You see his emotional struggles. You see him grow from “we have to keep the peace, let’s all be kind” to then showing us that he’s more than that. He is smart, cunning, manipulative if need be. He is also brave and he carries so much emotional baggage. The fact that he expresses rage about certain things, makes him feel more human to me. By giving him so much depth, by casting Aryan Simhadri, his depiction of grover would make book grover very proud.

Annabeth is also really really amazing in my eyes. Seeing a child give off an air of “i know things that you don’t” like an adult is so cool. Seeing her grow from “the gods are just and they have their reasons” to “The gods have flaws and they make mistakes, but i will be better than that” is very tear jerking. It helped me see Annabeth in those moments as a child who didn’t get to experience a proper childhood finally see what its like to be loved without having to give anything in return. Leah Sava Jeffries, shows emotions so well. Her posture changes depending on how she feels. She slouches a bit when she’s dejected or upset and is more poised when she’s feeling the most confident. Her eyes carry so much emotion in scenes where she doesn’t speak. She’s a lovely actress.

Percy, gods where do i even begin. Walker first off, played this character so well! You see how he’s feeling through his eyes, his face is so expressive and i love it. Percy also gets my mom approval card (which means my mom also loves his character). The way they show him to be loyal, caring, empathetic but also he’s just a child so you understand why he acts the way he acts. People complained about how percy wasn’t fighting like a pro, but i think that’s what makes it great. Percy is new, he’s learning as he goes, when we finally see Walker Portray the Percy that we all know, we can look back at s1 and we’ll see that truly, Percy has grown in skill. Also im always gonna sob over the fact that his scenes where he chooses to sacrifice himself for his friends, he always implies how he isn’t enough, we see how he sees himself and that hurts. Percy’s sass and humor though are also such highlights. I would love to see more of walker’s percy too.

Now honorable mention to my favorite backstabbing, pretty boy, luke. I love how he is such a good actor. Watching him play luke kinda immersed me in the moment, i forgot that this kind ,young man is the antagonist. Because when he played luke when we first saw him, i too wouldn’t be able to think that this guy, he can be cruel. But he delivers so much rage, so much resentment in his scene with percy in the finale. The way charlie acted in that scene, gods, i was shocked. I truly believe watching him and his character’s descent to something more is gonna be a rollercoaster ride of emotions.

The show in itself is really really good. Yes there are odd sudden black screens, but I don’t mind them. I don’t mind the changes, i just think that the episodes could be a bit longer. The story is captivating even with those changes, i love how Uncle Rick got the chance to give us an adaptation that isn’t an exact copy of the book, because i believe that a good adaptation doesn’t need to be a scene per scene copy, because if that’s what y’all wanted, listen to an audio book where people act out the scenes. Think of it this way, the book and the show are just two separate universes. Like how we have the MCU and the Marvel Comics. Same characters but different continuums.

People tend to find the negatives before they see the positives, its how we’re mostly wired. If we look past them, you’ll see that there are things that are better.

I would definitely be excited for a s2

#nikki rants pjo #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo tv show #pjo spoilers #essay

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innytoes · 8 months

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Hehehe YouTuber au headcanons?

More Youtuber AU!

-So Carrie is clearly huge in the fashion and beauty and lifestyle spheres. She does brutally honest product reviews with stuff she buys herself (because fuck sponsorships that require you say nice things), makeovers for herself and Reggie into different styles, make-up tips and routines, and every now and then she goes all Rich Youtuber and surprises her subscribers with like, a shopping spree or buying poor kids their prom outfits or whatever.

-Reggie's favourite was the one where she got them both a full historically accurate Renaissance Faire get-up.

-Also of course Dirty Candi has its own channel and they do stuff for that too.

-Very few people link Carrie's cute hype-man and boyfriend Reggie to that video essay channel that goes really, really in depth into Star Wars lore and background details, mostly because he doesn't show his face on that one.

-Some people are like: hey isn't he that tiktok guy who films himself giving dogs at the park the most unhinged compliments. (Insert clip of Reggie telling a Pomeranian she could lead armies and help them win the skeleton war, while she wags and lets him pet her)

-Alex has a reaction channel where he does both shows and movies he's never seen/was never allowed to watch as a child, as well as like tiktok stories and memes. People like his snarky sense of humour. They also love whenever he does something horror, because he insists on watching it with his cute boyfriend, who is 100% not phased by anything and will be like: it's okay babe the werewolf is just tearing that guy apart. Remember, he deserved it, he was rude to that gas station attendant trying to warn them not to go into Werewolf Woods.

-Willie doesn't have a youtube but he does post sick skateboard tricks on tiktok.... sometimes in locations he Should Not Be.

-Flynn has a channel where she makes parody songs and raps. Julie and the guys are sometimes featured.

-They all live together in a big mansion and people are like: OMG IT'S ANOTHER YOUTUBE HYPE HOUSE and Carrie is like: um no, this is my fucking house and the others just live here because else it gets boring and also Reggie is like a sad puppy if he doesn't get to hang out with his friends at least an hour every day.

-Julie as a Sims Youtuber. She started playing a lot after her mom died because you can turn on the Sims and forget about everything and suddenly it's four hours later, and she needed that at the start to just get through the days. She's got a few long-running series that are very popular.

-Julie is the only one going to school because her Tía would murder her if she dropped out of college to become a youtuber. Ray promises her he'll be proud no matter what she does but also he doesn't really understand Youtube and how you can make a living with it. He's very happy to help film on bigger projects or give camera advice to everyone, though.

-Everyone has guest starred on Carlos' ghost hunter show and people keep wondering how the hell he knows all these famous youtubers because he's such a small channel.

-Luke is the guy who is like: COME ON GUYS YOUTUBE ISN'T A VALID CAREER WE NEED TO BE DISCOVERED AS A BAND THE OLD FASHIONED WAY. He's like a cryptid that pops up in the background of everyone's videos. There's special Youtube Compilations of him from across the different channels, and he HATES IT.

#youtuber au #julie and the phantoms #carriexreggie #willex #the only time Luke had fun was when Flynn did a rock parody and he got to actually play #one time carrie did a sportswear review and reggie tried on the leggings and top as well #and let's just say he Broke a Specific Part Of Tumblr with that

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imaginationlandtrilogy · 1 year

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Kyle's Imaginationland Speech and Its Significance

The Imaginationland Trilogy is something that has a lot of heart and care put into it, as is visible by the overarching and interlocking stories, but nothing is more representative of this as the message it tells at the end of the episodes - Kyle's Imaginationland speech.

The trilogy consistently brings up the question: What is imaginary and what is reality? Upon first look, the answer is obvious to them. Imaginary things are things that are created by people - fiction. Reality is everything you can see and touch. The question is taken literally by the majority of everyone who faces it, but there are philosophical undertones present. In "Imaginationland Episode III” (S11E12), the men in The Pentagon are confronted with a deeper layer of the question: Are accepted realities that cannot be proven real or fake? They squabble over the reality of God, Heaven, and Hell, three prominently weighted topics, trying to understand the morality of the question. The problem with this is that everyone is trying to understand the question in a practical sense when it's not something that can be proven. It does not have a single answer, but rather, is an interpretive question - it's deeper than what it appears at surface level.

Kyle's interpretation of the question was especially heartfelt, and I resonated deeply with it:

"Because I-. I... Um... because I think... they are real. It's all real. Think about it. Haven't Luke Skywalker and Santa Claus affected your lives more than most real people in this room? I mean, whether Jesus is real or not, he... he's had a bigger impact on the world than any of us have. And the same could be said of Bugs Bunny and, a-and Superman and Harry Potter. They've changed my life, changed the way I act on the Earth. Doesn't that make them kind of 'real'? They might be imaginary, but, but they're more important than most of us here. And they're all gonna be around long after we're dead. So in a way, those things are more realer than any of us."

At the end of everything, Imaginationland is an ode to fiction. It's a love letter to OCs everywhere and the impact they've had on people's lives. So many references to different fictional characters were put into this trilogy, and seeing them come together in one place is very sentimental. It really does show the love and care for fiction embodied in these episodes.

There's a quote from Dead Poets Society that I always connect to this episode: "...and medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love - these are what we stay alive for."

Although it was originally said in the context of poetry, it's able to apply to the art of creation as a whole. Artistic media is made from love and passion, and that love and passion is then instilled in the viewer. People create to express themselves and share that with others, and that reigns especially true for fictional characters and worlds. This fiction is important, and just as Kyle said, it lives on longer than any of us. Some of the characters from the episodes are created by people who are long gone, but... their creations stay. Aslan was featured heavily in the trilogy, originally appearing in C.S. Lewis' The Chronicles of Narnia. Those books were published in the 1950s, the author dying the following decade, but despite being apart from this world, his creations live on. There was a film series derived from the books half a century following their original publishing. A screencap from the movies even continues to make its rounds on the Internet as a meme. Art inspires more art, which then will inspire more art. This is the power of fiction - it never truly dies.

Kyle's speech discusses characters such as Luke Skywalker and Superman, but the obvious is there, unspoken: South Park itself applies heavily to this speech. The show has been on for the past two decades, monumental for a television series, and even being here now, participating in fandom culture, we can't deny that it doesn't have an impact on us. In fact, I would say that those who participate in fandoms and keep the series alive are impacted more heavily than others. I scroll through my dashboard and there are characters everywhere - most, if not all, South Park blogs I see have a character they admire as their icon... and that shows just how much fiction has impacted us. We spend our time discussing and creating art for this show and its characters - we don't have to, we just like to. It's the freedom of creation. So... Kyle's speech isn't only an ode to fiction, but to South Park in itself. How much of an impact will this show have in ten years - twenty? Will it still be known in one hundred years? Honestly, it probably will. As long as there are people who know and acknowledge a piece of art, it lives on.

What and what isn't real - it's not tangible. It lives in our memory and our hearts, and I think that's exactly what Imaginationland and its message is. Santa Claus, Bugs Bunny, and even Kyle himself... they're all real in the sense of the presence and impact they've made on the earth. Reality isn't what you can see, it's what you can feel.

#☆#south park #meta #this is the oldest thing from my to-write list and i'm glad to finally have the motivation to write it!#if anyone's wondering. this is why the episodes are my url ... ode to fiction <3 i love you fiction. i love you sp.

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late-to-the-magnus-archives · 19 days

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Blood and sand - Chapter Thirteen

They didn’t really talk. Every night, Hastur let him in. And every night, Hastur said the same thing: Waste your magic on me, and let us see if there is anything of a cure to this slow and painful end.

Written for the @malevolentmadnessmixup. Art by @aktrashpanda.

>>>>READ ON AO3 OR BELOW<<<<

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Chapter Thirteen: Drowning

Finding the door up to the stained-glass hall was easy enough. It was neither locked nor barred, and he entered it just as easily. No Dancers descended; no big, booming voice told him to leave. So Luke climbed the stairs.

Hastur let him.

Soft music filtered through this place now, hovering, gently filling the shadows. Like the scents, it was calming, soothing, stabilizing. “Hello?” Luke called.

“Little human. Why have you returned?” said the King in Yellow from the darkness.

Hastur, Luke told himself, because names were important. “To give you some relief. I can stop before going too far this time, too.”

Hastur laughed, low and frightening; it was such a wicked sound, cruel and eager for pain. “That is very foolish.”

“I want to do it,” said Luke, well-aware that wasn’t a good answer.

“I see,” said the King. “Come to me, then. Waste your magic on me, and let us see if there is anything of a cure to this slow and painful end.”

He was not, as he’d thought, able to judge when to stop, and passed out, or was made unconscious. He still sat with the king for an hour, trying, pouring his magic—blue in his mind vision—into that gold; then he woke, staggered back down, and went to bed.

He did it again the next night. And the next. And the next.

No one asked him where he’d been; he knew, or believed, that he was making a difference, and that was all the accolades he needed.

Luke believed it wasn’t a waste.

Besides, he had more magic to spend now, thanks to Oscar’s training. Dennis was still unhappy, but he trained Luke as he had been, working on the physical aspect.

Luke was just glad to have Dennis back, even if he did refuse to speak about Oscar. “Well, that’s who I wanted to bring back,” he answered just once. “But I don’t understand how he’s here. I didn’t find him. He wasn’t home.” And that was all he’d say on the matter.

It was endless. More monsters arrived by the week, and the new moon neared. Oscar would be leaving soon. Luke tried not to think about it.

In the middle of dinner one night, they were ordered to play battleships, and that’s when Luke learned the arena could be flooded.

Everyone had small boats, basic and creaking wood that slowly leaked, that tipped its occupants out with startling ease, that bobbed unsteadily on choppy water made choppy by the monsters that now swam it.

Monsters with back ridges, each fin bigger than his tiny boat, which swam just shallowly enough to disturb the water as they slid beneath his bow like a deadly tease.

“Steady,” said Oscar. “This changes things a bit. You’re going to feel people drowning. You’v got to stay strong, and focus on Arthur.”

Luke would try.

A small boat—propelled by magic and its hooting owners—sped past, splashing them. Luke gasped at the cold.

Arthur had his own boat. Every single other vessel carried a minimum of three, but not his. Dennis (back to his usual smile) had handed out the assignments.

The third wheel in Oscar and Luke’s boat was clearly not pleased by this. A large, furry beast, its features goat-like and its hands bear-claws, it hunched in the stern, scowling at them.

“Focus,” said Oscar. “Here we go.” And on cue, the trumpet rang.

Those who had the power to propel their boats did at once, at each other, completely reckless and sure. The first crash resulted in immediate casualty: four people went in the water; two grappled, bloody, atop the wreckage; and then whatever lurked below raised enormous, spiky tentacles from the water to simply take the people who fell overboard.

Luke hyperventilated, briefly overwhelmed. They were being eaten. Pain and suffering, life being chewed away.

He caught movement from the corner of his eye, and turned in time to see their boat partner lunge at him—

And then it shouted, fell to its side in the boat, and howled in pain.

Luke cataloged its injuries instinctively. The vessels in its legs had been expanded until they exploded, hemorrhaging; the tendons were taut, stretched as if cramping. The joints of its toes were suddenly scar-filled and impossible to bend.

Oscar looked down at it, frowning, a very serious face, a truly grim face, as if he hadn’t wanted to do this, but had no choice. “We are on your side, sir. We’re in this boat together, literally. I will thank you not to try that again.”

Luke saw. He looked up at Oscar with wonder in his face.

“We don’t kill unnecessarily,” said Oscar. “Keep an eye out, now.” Using paddles, they kept their boat in sight of Arthur, who had abandoned his own boat to leap into someone else’s, armed with his paddle, and proceeded to knock all of them into the water.

It churned. Blood bubbled, foaming, rising.

Arthur had taken damage. He was gasping, bleeding; one eye hid under a waterfall of blood from his scalp.

Luke looked and Oscar healed, and Luke saw how he did it, loved the precision, observed the control.

Arthur nodded his thanks, then paddled after another boat.

Someone’s rammed into theirs. Luke cried out and fell next to the fur-guy, but before the attackers could board, they shouted, all of them, and collapsed into their boat.

Oscar handed Luke his dropped paddle.

Luke rose, shaken, and paddled with him. “You’re… really fast.”

“I have to be,” said Oscar.

Arthur had changed boats again and was latched onto some enormous potato-looking thing, biting (yes, Luke, thought, biting) deep into that thing’s side.

“He knows where to strike,” murmured Oscar. “Look.”

It wasn’t random, Arthur’s attack-point: there was some organ close to the skin there, fragile, somehow involved with reproduction, and Arthur digging into that meant the potato-being would be down and out from blood loss quickly.

Yikes.

Arthur slid off; the potato-guy collapsed. And Arthur was paddling again.

Luke wanted to jump over there and heal that creature. He wanted to heal the one behind him. Wouldn’t they be grateful? Surely they would. He’d been told they’d attack, but why, when they’d just been helped?

Then he caught the look from the guy on the bottom of their boat, and was reminded the warnings had been right. The look was envy, and hate; it was venom, and heat. There was nothing in it of hope or help or pleading. No softness.

Luke swallowed.

“Steady,” said Oscar, pulling his attention back.

The goal—to bring one’s ship to the dock on the opposite side—was nearly in reach now. They’d already be there if not for Arthur.

“He’s lost his focus,” Oscar murmured, frowning. “John isn’t helping as he should.”

Luke startled. “John?” he said. “He’s real?”

“Ach, yes,” said Oscar. “He’s—”

The dark shape under the water suddenly surfaced, and everything went to hell.

All the boats clustered near that far dock flipped, dumping occupants. Tentacles rose, ready for the smorgasbord. Everyone in the water changed target from one another to the water beasts. Suddenly, only reaching the safety of the docks mattered.

Oscar was a strong swimmer, in spite of missing an arm, and he made it there, then, one-handed, pulled Luke up. All around them, warriors climbed out of the water; all around them, others failed, and were pulled down. And Arthur—

Someone had set their sights on Arthur instead of the monsters or the docks. Someone who swam up and attacked him from behind, and they both went under.

“No!” shouted Luke, lurching forward.

Oscar pulled him back. “If you go in, you can’t reach him in time! Watch! Use your power when you see them, and watch!”

He was right. It was too far. But still, Luke shook, staring at the wild water, bloody and frothing, and watched. Stared. Looked.

Arthur surfaced, but he wasn’t moving well. His face was blue, and blood streamed from his eyes. Almost immediately, he went under again.

“Come on, Arthur,” said Oscar, focusing hard.

Luke looked harder. He couldn’t fully see. Arthur was…

In a flash, a searing blip of electric blue, Luke saw past the waves and past the froth to Arthur himself, to Arthur’s bright red body, misshapen by wounds, by black holes where something had tried to eat him.

Arthur was actively dying, and Oscar had him alive by the skin of his teeth.

The world went muffled, darkened all along its edges to highlight that one spot of bloody water, and before he could think through what he was doing, Luke jumped in.

He could swim, damn it, and he did so now.

Under the surface, the water was horrible, filthy, filled with flecks of who knew what and clouds of viscera, and Arthur hung in the water, tight like a shrimp, a cloud of blood rising from his mouth. Luke swam to him, kicked up to get a breath, and went back down.

Arthur… something had taken a chunk out of his right side. He was missing… so much.

Luke didn’t think. With everything in him, he focused on Arthur’s heart, on Arthur’s flesh, on missing things that would have to be fucking regrown.

It was overwhelming for one second. Then, it wasn’t; Oscar would keep Arthur alive, so Luke could focus on what needed to be done.

It only made sense to push as much of himself into this as possible.

Luke forgot about breathing. He forgot about the flailing, seeking tentacles in the water, and the desperate warriors, fighting to survive. He forgot everything except Arthur’s body, and Arthur’s life.

He knew organs. Knew them, as if he’d been making them all his life, and he knew how to do this. Could.

Had to.

Would.

Arthur would not be dying tonight.

Luke found himself pulled abruptly onto the dock, panting. Oscar jumped back in and returned with Arthur a moment later, and with Luke’s help, got him out of the water.

Luke had sealed him up. Luke had replaced Arthur’s organs.

Arthur moaned, miserable, clutching his side.

Oscar panted. “Nearly there. Finer… blood vessels and the lymphatic system and the like. Almost there.”

Luke wasn’t done. He was dizzy, but together, they could do this. Arthur would not die tonight! But damn, that drain was a problem, getting in his way. It just wouldn’t stop, and for whatever reason, right now that Arthur was in danger of his life, it seemed to be pulling even harder.

“Breathe,” Oscar wheezed, ordering Arthur, channeling healing.

That stupid drain. Pulling on Arthur’s lifeforce. Like a living thing.

“Fuck,” Arthur moaned.

“It was venomous. Luke, focus!” Oscar said. “Find the damage the poison is doing and counter it. You can do it.”

Looking that closely told Luke more than he’d known before. He could see the thread of that drain actively eating Arthur’s life. He could see it, find it, follow it to its source, locked somehow behind Arthur’s eyes. Arthur couldn’t afford the drain right now. Not now.

“Easy,” Oscar breathed.

All around them, chaos, shouting; there were no more boats now, but only wreckage, and all survivors huddled on the docks.

Luke could see just… where… it was. Yes; tangles. The drain had tied itself to things, threading through and around Arthur on the cellular level, but this wasn’t honestly any different than the cancer Luke had treated in Celephaïs. It slid thin threads of itself beneath every follicle, around every vein, but Luke could see them, and he knew what he had to do.

The drain was desperate. The moment he tried to untangle, it went nuts, desperate, searing. Its hunger scared him, its fear captured him, its desperation warned him, and somehow, Luke began throwing stuff into its grasping claws, filling its hands with soma, keeping it from grabbing at Arthur, or at him, because it tried, and Luke didn’t think about where he was getting the stuff, only that it was needed, more and more, and Luke kept grabbing, and kept untangling, and suddenly Arthur arched off the dock with a gasp, his eyes flying open, and he screamed, and someone else roared, and Luke! came from a deep big bass god voice, and—

Luke woke up. The silence was shocking. Both suns had risen; he lay in the soft, dry sand of the arena, staring at the sky, surrounded by adults.

“Luke?” said Arthur, whose eyes were blue, whose eyes moved erratically now, at nothing, in no direction.

“Son,” said Oscar, visibly relieved, and there were tear tracks on his cheeks.

“Fuck,” said the Butcher, Dennis Collins.

Luke looked up at grown-up number four.

Who was a monstrosity in a cloak.

Who had tentacles wriggling, reaching around, touching everything.

Who had ebon-dark hide like someone else Luke knew and saw for an hour a day. A dozen mismatched eyes peered at Luke through the gap in the hood. Its body buzzed loud, and like one Luke had heard before.

“What did you do?” Arthur said.

Luke tried to sit up, and instead had to roll over and throw up a lot of nasty water.

“Easy, lad,” said Dennis. “You’ve swallowed more water than was in this whole place, I think.”

Luke coughed. “Tastes so bad,” he said.

“I’ll bet it does,” said Dennis. “Full of literal shit, by the time everybody got gutted.”

Ugh. He’d have to do all kinds of bacterial healing on himself. And the others. And…

“What did you do?” said Arthur again.

Luke really didn’t feel like answering. “Helped,” he said.

“Fuck this,” said Arthur over his shoulder to the fourth being. “You’re out. You’re going. You’re leaving.”

“No,” said the fourth being, and Luke did a double-take. That was Hastur’s voice. That was undeniably Hastur’s voice.

“Don’t you ‘no’ me,” Arthur snapped.

“He can’t leave,” said Dennis. “The arena’s already tasted his blood, accepted him. There’s only one way out now.”

Everyone stared at him.

“You leave all the time,” Arthur accused.

“Because I’m bound to the god of this place,” said Dennis in what was almost a patient tone. “She knows I’ll come back.”

“She?” said Oscar, perking up.

“The arena. You think I’d be meaning your whore of a god?”

“Insult her again,” said Oscar, low, his one fist clenching.

“Okay, enough,” said Arthur, cutting it off before it went further. “John didn’t sign up for this. He needs to leave.”

“He can’t.” Dennis was unmoved. “And you damn well know there is only one way out. As it is, the priest can only go if he goes soon. However the hell he got here.”

Arthur wobbled. The being steadied him.

Luke looked. He inhaled. “You’re not well,” he said, sitting up and reaching for Arthur.

Arthur didn’t see it. His eyes still jittered, left and right and all over, reminding Luke of a fire hose he saw once, disconnected and flailing. “I’m fucking fine!”

“You’re fucking blind,” said the not-Hastur behind him.

Blind? Luke looked, and—

He woke up again on the sand, feeling woozy, and moaned. His head hurt.

The other men were shouting. Arthur was shouting, the not-Hastur was shouting, Dennis kept declaring, “You know the rule! There’s one way out! One! You win! That’s it!”

“I won’t fight him!” Arthur bellowed.

“You think I’d kill Arthur?” snarled not-Hastur.

Luke reached for that blindness again and winced. He’d definitely over-extended himself. “His eyes…”

“I already tried, son,” Oscar said softly. “Whatever that is, it’s above our paygrade.”

“He’s cursed?” Luke said.

“I think so, yes,” said Oscar.

Luke couldn’t fix curses. Sometimes, he could counter the results of them, but he couldn’t fix curses. His own eyes filled. “How’s he going to fight if he can’t see?”

And that was a question they’d all clearly already been parsing.

“Next time you leave, you take him and go,” snarled the not-Hastur.

“No,” said Dennis with patience beyond patience. “It wouldn’t work. He can’t leave. You knew the risks when you signed up. Did you think no one would ever know you had a fucking whole other person inside you?”

Arthur snarled… but not quite in the right direction. He was blind. Fully blind. How could he do this? Luke gulped. “Why is he blind? Who cursed him?”

“I don’t know, son,” said Oscar.

Luke finally managed to fully sit up. He felt raw, as if he’d horked up parts of his esophagus instead of just foul water. The thought of that water turned his stomach again. “Help me stand, please?” he said, and managed to get to his feet.

And the Dancers must have been waiting for just that moment. They came across the sand in a rush, pointed feet digging divots and sending it flying behind them.

“Shit!” said the huge not-Hastur, who proceeded to pick Arthur up (“No! Stop!” cried Arthur to absolutely no effect) and lurch toward the exit, not quite rolling, not quite running, not quite moving in a way Luke could understand, as if the guy had too many limbs and didn’t know how to work them yet.

Oscar moved forward, between Luke and the oncoming golden horde. Dennis stood back, grim, looking like he’d been asked to eat something unpleasant.

Come, the Dancers said, circling, moving in, all of their pointed limbs sweeping in Luke’s direction and leaving little golden trails behind them. Come.

“He’s not going anywhere,” said Oscar grimly.

“Like we can stop him,” said Dennis. “Go on, lad.”

“He’s not had a chance to recover!” Oscar snapped.

“I’ll go,” said Luke. “It’ll be all right.”

“After what you did down here, I’m not so sure,” said Oscar.

“It’s okay,” said Luke, because he was sure he hadn’t done anything wrong. “I’ll go.”

Oscar gave him a look as if Luke had volunteered to walk into fire.

Luke patted his arm. “I’ll be okay. I promise.”

Dennis chuckled darkly. “Now, that’s faith, innit, priest?’

“What is your problem?” Oscar snapped, turning from Luke to scowl at Dennis.

“You can’t be here. I didn’t bring you. Whoever let you in used my blood, somehow. I’ve got a lot of problems with all of it,” said Dennis.

The Dancers moved closer, their voices no longer in sync. Come… come… come…

Luke sighed. He couldn’t fix their argument, and lacked the words to explain the fake-Butcher thing. “Lead on,” he said, and followed as they drifted away, fully graceful now that their purpose had been fulfilled.

Meanwhile, Arthur and that other guy were long out of sight.

That other guy.

John. It had to be John. The drain, the voice in Arthur’s head, which meant Arthur had not been crazy, after all.

John, who sounded like Hastur.

Couldn’t be. Could it? Could John be the missing piece?

Luke coughed a little, his lungs still angry from aquatic assault, and followed the Dancers up a new set of stairs (of course they felt steeper) and to the hall of many colors.

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[chapter fourteen] [masterpost]

#malevolent #malevolent au #malevolent fic #arthur lester #john doe #dennis collins #luke yang #kiy malevolent #malevolent madness mixup #blood and sand fic #kayne malevolent #oscar malevolent

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dungeons-are-too-cold · 2 years

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Do i hate Kevin? no, I don't think I do. However, I do think he puts Penelope in a lot of very uncomfortable situations so I definitely like Luke a lot more. I don't think that what Kevin expects of her is fair, and Luke expects nothing of her but everything of himself to keep her safe and happy.

Luke not only actively avoids putting Penelope in any uncomfortable position, but also does absolutely everything in his power to get her out of uncomfortable situations she inevitably finds herself in considering their line of work and her online presence. He does the little things like offering his hand to help her off the curb in 12x14 collision course, all the way to dropping everything to help her in 15x4, Saturday. He makes sure to not only solve the stalking case of the young woman in Penelope's hacking class but also let her know that he is there for her through everything and if she ever needs his help with her own cyber stalker or with anything at all, he will be there for her. That's the kind of support that she needs, and deserves. She needs to know she has someone to lean on, someone who offers to be her soft place to land because she isn't going to ask for it.

Kevin doesn't communicate very well with Penelope. I'm currently watching 4x23, Roadkill, and he has had these secret job interviews for a classified overseas position. He mentions to her that he didn't want to tell her "until it was real" and then proceeds to ask her to move with him, away from her family at the BAU, to be with him in some country god knows where with no ability to tell her loved ones where exactly she is. Does he not know who she is? Penelope needs stability. She needs her little creature comforts, like her good coffee and her sparkly desk. She also needs open communication, honest communication, and being lied to and then subsequently being asked to do something which requires her to lie is not only a wildly misguided but completely inappropriate request for anyone, let alone for Penelope.

One of the things that makes Penelope fall for Kevin even more than she already had in the beginning is his "man to man" talk with Rossi. I think its not only because she takes comfort in his fatherly role in her life and appreciates Kevin's formality, but also because what she values is direct communication about expectations and desires. The position Kevin puts her in during Roadkill is the exact opposite of why she trusted him to further their relationship in the beginning.

Maybe this is me reading into things and making a much bigger deal of this, but it clearly upsets her that Kevin thinks this was the right way to go about this. She is understanding of his desires for career growth, she wants him to pursue what makes him feel good, and she never would have told him to stay for her if he really wanted the position. The fact that he doesn't know that means he doesn't know her. All he knows is that it would hurt for them to say goodbye, which is true it would, and he thinks that he is sparing her some kind of heartache by lying or by asking her to apply. Again, this further proves that he doesn't know her at all.

On second thought, I do hate Kevin. The more I watch him with her, the more I realize he in no way has Penelope's best interest at heart. He pressures her, and rushes thing, and tries to make her life into something that works for him. Luke is patient, and understanding, so much so that he waits until she isn't on the team to ask her out because he is respectful of her boundaries and he needs. Kevin is so domineering and controlling but there is no doubt in my mind about the way Luke lets Penelope lead when it comes to their relationship.

This post is dedicated to @snailsandpuppy-dogtails cuz you actually made me come back and finish writing it lmao so i hope you approve of my analysis.

Also tagging @darcyfangirlsfrequently cuz i feel like I cant make a garvez post without tagging you both

#garvez #criminal minds watch through #criminal minds #luke alvez #penelope garcia #kevin lynch

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mykingdomforasong · 2 years

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I think what’s missing from the dinluke conversation is the distinction and connection between individual actions vs fandom culture. Someone putting Luke in a dress or exploring gender nonconformity through his character is not a problem, but it is a problem when it trickles through fandom and becomes codified as “Luke is The Woman, Din Is The Man.” Someone writing non-con alone is not a problem, but, again, when it becomes influenced by ethnicity and codified as “Din is a violent abuser who craves power over Luke,” it becomes a problem. It’s why these discussions feel so personal to people and why things get so vitriolic.

And it’s not to take away personal responsibility either, I think it just means that it’s extra important that we all step back and understand how we and others are contributing, and try to look at the complexities, rather than implying that “Luke in a dress is bad” because that doesn’t help anyone. People who dislike these trends will see any depiction of something that reminds them of the greater problem and assume it’s bad without a second glance, meanwhile people who like these trends will remain convinced that what they’re doing isn’t bad because they don’t mean it. Nobody understands each other, and nobody wins.

What’s lacking is the understanding that culture IS bigger than any one of us, but we all do contribute to it and have to take responsibility for how it affects queer people and people of color.

(This isn’t directed at you, this is just avenue to share my thoughts, thank u for listening)

Yeah, I think that's an excellent way to describe it.

Every time someone writes or draws gnc Luke, they have not Done a Heteronormativity, so to speak. The issue is, as you pointed out, how things become fandom trends.

When things become widely accepted fanon, it's often like looking at your faves through a fun house mirror. Like, I recognize that that's suppose to be Luke, but it's very distorted. I think why dark!DinLuke tends to be so at the center of all these debates is that those fics are where the distortion is the most obvious and most consistent. It's easy to point at those fics and say "this group of fics is engaging in anti-Latino prejudice and homophobic heteronormativity." I think that's true, but I also think that we should avoid implying that if they went away, we'd have some utopian fandom space.

It's really easy for fanon interpretations to subliminally seep into our brains and affect how we think about these characters, because it's easier to read a few fanfics every week than to constantly rewatch the OT and The Mandalorian. Fanon characterizations tend to flatten the characters down to a few key traits, they are often subject to bias and prejudice, and because they develop somewhat slowly, they are often accepted by the majority of fans and reproduced.

I don't think the answer for the individual creator is to sit there anxious about everything they create and its potential impact (although some self reflection never hurts). Just think of your characters as complex people rather than fandom tropes or in terms of sexual roles. And also maybe rewatch the Original Trilogy once and a while. It's pretty good

#a good example was the early trend of mechanic din and kindergarten teacher luke which briefly became the fanon accepted modern au jobs #dinluke #and again #i am not saying gnc or trans hc are bad!#i would be a profound hypocrite if that were the case #I also do not consider myself immune to these issues or criticism

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gleefullypolin · 12 days

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Glad to be a breath of fresh air! I don't want to say that I cringe a lot in the tag with the takes but, you know, yeah.😩

I don't particularly enjoy the double standard on either side but it really does seem to always come down harder on the women, especially any woman who doesn't present as expected. Just look at our little Pen being called the villain when we know if it was someone else there'd be a lot less of that. I'm still seeing bad takes 4 years later from another fandom I was in where a man and woman both made the same mistake and strangely, only her bad choice is talked about. Never his.

I agree, this isn't even on my list of things to worry about, ha. I have heard two versions of the rumor, one where he's there with them and one where he's watching them. I'm not going to get into the sudden fandom activism taking place about two women being paid to entertain a man but I will say that the distinction (if either is true!) is what I'd be most interested. It doesn't matter either way in the end but if it's the latter with him just watching, that's an entirely different thing that would need to be unpacked. Either way he's using escapism but not participating and a later scene being unable to participate? That's a man going through it and probably deserves some grace when he's also about to make himself suffer needlessly further.

People have made up their minds what the scene is without context or confirmation and it's certainly up to them to do so but having so much fandom experience I can say I've never seen anyone's worst case spiral of doom scenario they proclaim as fact be true in the end.

This man looking all over the world to find what he needs right across the road is great. He's been trying to be a Very Grown Up Man since s1 and he hasn't found purpose yet. I can't wait to see him actually find it this time.

Oh I agree, the media is the worst with fandom. It's best to stay out of it if possible. The media doesn't seem to understand the passion that the fandom has in all and tries to utilize it in all of the wrong ways. They're out of touch with a lot of it and truly, adding in the way a lot of fans feel entitled to what they want, it's always going to end in a melt down. Given the generational divide as well, you're going to have a bunch of people who think something is the worst thing in the world and the people who think it's really not that big of a deal so what are they yelling about?

I'm not saying it's easier to wait for context but in a month I feel like most of them won't even remember the full scope of their freak outs.

I have to say I DO cringe a lot, I try and stay neutral. That’s what I tell myself. I have actually stayed away from Tumblr honestly, but then there were all these pretty pictures, and I couldn’t resist. And then my big mouth takes off and all these ideas get in my head, and I use my blog as my therapy sessions.

Usually, my therapy is just with myself because most people just ignore what I have to say until you so thankfully came along to join into my sessions, and I must say I have truly appreciated not having to talk to myself all day long!

To the issue at hand…double standards…My word. We do live in a world today where women are sure held to a different standard than men and interesting that as I had thought we were moving out of regency standards of women having much more say and agency of themselves, we seem to step backwards more and more each day.

But that is a much bigger hole of a topic, when it comes to fandom however, we do seem to hold our men to a larger standard when it comes to our ships. God help Luke after this season airs. I pray our ladies and gents are on their best behavior to remember that Nic and Luke play these characters with the best intent and love for who they are and what is written for them.

I don’t know what will come of the article, I know the Sun is iffy and I’ve seen a lot of people say, “Yes its true” But there is 1) saying its true and 2) seeing it on screen. Back when screeners would give us a play by play of Glee episodes, they would tell us how a scene would play out and we would all get angry over a single phrase or an explanation of a specific description of a scene. Our brains all would create the story of what the intent was behind this one sentence or descriptor. Then we would get to the episode and the actual script around what played out was nothing near what my brain had created in that 2 second nightmare.

I’m sure we get a set up scene showing us that Colin is knowledgeable around a bodega, he’s been to these in his travels, he’s experienced with women, these are something that interest him and he’s curious about. That’s the set up. Then comes Pen. There is a kiss. There is confusion. Not realization, but confusion. Pen meets Obi Wan Debling. They hit it off. Success. Colin has done what he set out to do. He has accomplished his goal of making up with his best friend for his careless words the season prior. His unnerved, he needs release for some reason. He returns to what has calmed him before…but now scene two returns us to the familiar that is a set up for the audience and Colin to see that now is different. He no longer has interest. His confusion lifts because all he sees is Pen and he no longer wants what is offered in front of him.

And maybe I am also guilty of making up my mind about a scene before it plays out, because I have no context or confirmation either, but I would certainly be ok with being wrong also. I would prefer to take that than spiral into something else. To accept that Colin who has never been needlessly cruel instead is just a whore who is using his friend Pen to hurt her further while getting his rocks off. Because that is not the same person who can’t even swallow because she told him his eyes are really pretty. It just doesn’t compute so I refuse to spiral any other way.

In 27 days, all we will care about is that these beautiful people are staring at each other on our screens and we will be freaking out for more wonderful reasons.

#my asks #wonderful people

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zasterikz · 5 months

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white american men making vain self righteous conversions to what they mistakenly call orthadox christianity in a pathetic attempt to justify their adherence to americanist fundamentalism is a much bigger problem than we as traditional sacramental christians seem to realise. same goes for those believing themselves to be converts to western catholicism, the motherhouse of my own faith. they spout views that to their american siblings seem sound christian views, but which to the rest of christendom are gross obsessions with issues that have always either been minor nuances, simply never existed, or directly in opposition to the truth of the gospel.

I see them talking about gun control as if christ himself taught us to live by the sword, and not that those who live by the sword die by the sword, and pray the hefty price of failing to be agents of peace in this violent world. I see them talk about climate change as if our responsibility to care for God's greatest gift to us (the glorious planet Earth) was only an afterthought, and not the very heart and soul of our mission as agents of heaven on earth, as if 90% of our holy texts isn't instructions for a bountiful & low impact agricultural methodology that feeds all no matter their financial state. they talk about those on benefits and other government assistance as a roman talks of his slaves whose suffering he refuses to even attempt understanding, and who he will work forcefully into a terrible slow death.

their near-total lack of empathy and of compassion is plain as the sun in the sky. they behave as if our servant king, our co-suffering messiah and son of man were little more than a divinely appointed fascist dictator sent to stroke the egos of society's most privileged few whilst paying only vain lip service to the beatitudal way. as if the salvation of our species through all time rests solely on the back of party political squabbling & bureaucratic power games, and our faith propped up only by a series of aristocratic commands in the language of platonic philosophy; not the clear and concise truth of the gospel preached by Jesus Christ in the tongue and company of the prophets.

for now I simply pray that God will look on them with a heart of compassionate love, leading them as they must be led into the truth that christ spoke and far from the satanic snares of arrogant and hateful ideologies. I pray for an end to the continuing normalisation of christofascism, which has become so pervasive that its adherents believe themselves to be merely 'conservative'. and I pray that soon our churches will no longer be abused for the self aggrandisement of those society has already handed untold power and influence.

perhaps I pray in vain; perhaps these are the antichrists who populate the earth in her dying days, and perhaps soon judgement will come and their sins and ours be wiped away so that we may live peaceably together in loving communion in the eternal kingdom of heaven, where the first are last and the last are first, where the meek and the peaceful rise above the proud and aggressive to reorder the world as gods own son ordained for us those many years ago.

I leave you with the words of the gospels:

Luke 1:46-55 (Mary's song of praise)

“My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has looked with favor on the lowly state of his servant.

Surely from now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me, and holy is his name; indeed, his mercy is for those who fear him from generation to generation.

He has shown strength with his arm; he has scattered the proud in the imagination of their hearts.

He has brought down the powerful from their thrones and lifted up the lowly; he has filled the hungry with good things and sent the rich away empty.

He has come to the aid of his child Israel, in remembrance of his mercy, according to the promise he made to our ancestors, to Abraham and to his descendants forever.”

Matthew 5:1-12 (The Beatitudes)

When Jesus saw the crowds, he went up the mountain, and after he sat down, his disciples came to him. And he began to speak and taught them, saying:

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will receive mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

Blessed are those who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are you when people revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you."

Matthew 19:12 (Teaching on sexual & gender deviance)

"For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let anyone accept this who can."

#pinned for posterity #this is a catholic blog and abuse of the faith by those with whom it is least concerned will not be tolerated here

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jarrodwbrown · 10 months

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Remember Lot's Wife

It looked a bit like a scene from the classic comedy sitcom Sanford and Son. I finished loading my truck late Friday night. The tarp covering the boxes of personal belongings and precious memories was tightly secured. Saturday morning I’d be pulling out early to make the 12 hour drive to Houston. This would be the beginning of the rest of my life, okay maybe not the rest of my life but it would mark the beginning of a new chapter.

(not actually my truck)

Saturday morning was beautiful, it was cool and low humidity, the perfect summer morning in middle Tennessee. I drove across the bridge on the edge of my farm and pulled onto the highway and in just a few minutes I was on Interstate 40 headed west. Moving is always stressful, so much to do, so much to get taken care of, but there’s also a feeling of excitement as you look to the new adventure that you’re embarking on, perhaps a new job opportunity, a promotion at your current job, maybe its a bigger house for your growing family, or perhaps you’re moving to go to college, whatever the case it’s usually exciting. My move is less than exciting and a bit more humbling. I’m moving to Houston, Texas where at 47 years old my son, Levi and I, will be moving in with my parents, at least for the short term. I set the cruise control at 80, checked my side mirror, and looked back at a long highway that seemed to be growing longer behind me as I moved further away from a life that once was.

Looking back is something that we often do. History in and of itself captivates me, what happened at a particular moment in time, what events led to that moment, and then what came from it. A quick scroll through the camera roll on my phone can bring up some incredibly nostalgic emotions, in particular seeing my children grow up, I can flash through 20 years of life in a matter of minutes. And in doing so I can feel a wave of emotions come over me, like a sudden ocean wave that can catch you off guard on what was an otherwise pleasant time at the beach, these emotions can knock you off of your feet as easily as that unsafe ocean wave can. I can begin to think of the “should have’s”. The “should have’s” is a dangerous place to visit and once visited it is so tantalizing to hang out there, and even worse to dwell in this place. The “should have’s” represent a certain level of fault, blame or guilt that we feel for how it was or how we were or how we did or perhaps how we didn’t. While a quick visit to this place might be beneficial in order to recognize how much you’ve done to get to where you are today, in whatever aspect it may be, that quick visit is rarely just a quick visit. The struggle that presents is that the nostalgic emotions that roll in like a wave when there for a quick visit can quickly turn into a time of hanging out and if we let down our guard we will find ourselves dwelling there. Once this has occurred we all too often forget that it was not in spite of the “should have’s” that God has made us who we are today or that God has allowed us to achieve what we have achieved today, rather it’s very much because of what we learned from those past experiences that shaped who we are today. Without those experiences it is very likely that we would not be who we are today. When I put that into perspective then I’m able to better understand Chrsit’s words in Luke 17:32 when he says, “Remember Lot’s wife.” When God spared Lot, his wife, and his two daughters from the looming destruction that was planned for Sodom and Gamorra he specifically told them to not look back. I don’t believe that these instructions were because the destruction of Sodom and Gamorra was to be like looking at a welding arc, whose bright glow can severely damage the unprotected eye. I believe that God said don’t look back because that place, that life, those memories were not beneficial, they were not Holy, they would not serve any purpose in the new life that God was planning for Lot and his family. But not looking is hard. Just about every kid who has ever spent time in a shop with someone welding learned the hard way why they were told not to look. No matter how badly they tried to not watch the welder at some point they couldn’t resist any more. Hopefully for most, like myself, we ended up with only a slight burning in our eyes that was gone by the next morning. Obviously Lot’s wife learned the hard way as well. God knows what he’s talking about.

Lot’s wife looked back. It’s understandable. Why? Because we want to see, we enjoy looking back, remembering what was, feeling nostalgic. As evil and perverse as Sodom and Gamorra were, it was their home. Undoubtedly Lot’s wife had many friends there, undoubtedly they had many family memories there, and as bad or even toxic as the environment was, it was familiar, it felt safe, it was known. The unknown, also referred to as the future, is scary for many of us. The unknown requires a level of faith that most of us want to have but find ourselves falling short day after day and year after year. Perhaps that’s why we struggle so hard to not look back. Looking back is familiar, and even as toxic and unsafe as it might have been in Sodom and Gamorra, the familiarity of it created a false sense of security for Lot’s wife.

Whatever you’re facing right now I encourage you to be present in this moment. Don’t allow yourself to hang out and even worse, dwell on what events took place to get you here, just be present. Don’t look back. And as tempting as it may be, be careful at looking too far into the future, it can oftentimes create as much, if not more, anxiety than dwelling in the past. Christ knows that, that’s why he also commands us to not worry about tomorrow! Be the best version of you today, whatever that looks like, rest tonight, and do it all over again tomorrow.

So, here’s to NOT looking back. Here's to a new chapter. Here’s to spending some long overdue quality time with my parents. My past, while it hardly compares to that of Lot and his family, nonetheless is marked by some less than ideal moments, I think most of us can agree with that statement. I’m excited about what lies ahead, about new adventures, new experiences, new relationships, and new memories to add to my camera roll. I hope that you’ll be a part of those as well!! If you’re in the Houston area, don’t be surprised when I reach out to see about grabbing a coffee!

#looking back #be present #new beginnings #new chapter #life after divorce

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coinprojects · 2 years

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New Post has been published on https://coinprojects.net/resilience-risks-cryptocurrency-and-blockchain/

Resilience risks: cryptocurrency and blockchain

Particulars Printed: Friday, 20 Could 2022 12:46

Resilience and danger professionals, significantly these from a non-IT background, must develop their total understanding of rising applied sciences says Luke Hen, FBCI. How else are they going to have the ability to totally admire the magnitude of dangers probably going through their enterprise? On this article Luke offers a backgrounder on cryptocurrency and blockchain within the context of danger.

Many resilience and danger professionals who’re much less in contact with the world of expertise will say, “My IT people will inform me,” however past the ‘techy’ descriptions you’re solely ever getting their particular person and specialist perspective. Are your IT specialists conscious of all of the enterprise processes that depend on that expertise and in several methods? Or maybe even the attainable affect to buyer expertise if the expertise was misplaced? Or, the way it would possibly affect the long-term management technique as to why they’ve the expertise within the first place?

To assist contextualise the danger it’s subsequently very important for resilience and danger professionals, who face off to a spread of senior stakeholders, to have a primary understanding of the expertise that has been applied of their group.

This text goes to try to take a look at the extremely fashionable however extremely complicated world of cryptocurrency and blockchain expertise however from a danger lens. Nevertheless, earlier than that may be completed, one must attempt to perceive what it’s…

And therein lies the problem. Let’s give it a shot!

Cryptocurrency and non-financial danger

Cryptocurrency is now in every single place you look. It’s within the information; it’s on-line and your family and friends are in all probability discussing it and are probably investing in it.

In a latest article, the European Central Bank reported that the crypto market is now bigger than the sub-prime mortgage market was when price USD 1.3 trillion (earlier than the crash). It’s subsequently no shock that some elements of economic companies are starting to have a look at how they could become involved.

As resilience and danger professionals, we have to have an consciousness of what that is, the place it got here from and the place it’s probably going. The problem, as with something new, is that it’s coated in jargon and thriller!

The place did it come from?

The origins of cryptocurrency, when it was invented, and who it was that made the invention are nonetheless up for some debate. Nevertheless, it’s unique rise in reputation is in little question attributed to the creator of a kind of cryptocurrency known as Bitcoin in 2009, by somebody known as Satoshi Nakamoto (or quite the software program builders utilizing that pseudonym as a result of no person is aware of who this individual is!).

That is already too difficult for me – what’s it? the place do I begin?

With out taking place too deeply down into the rabbit holes of the mechanics behind cryptocurrency and shedding you with phrases like cipher textual content and uneven cryptography (which is an article in its personal proper). The place ought to one discover the fundamentals?

There are infinite streams of books, podcasts, YouTube and tutorial content material on-line that cowl the fundamentals and origins of cryptocurrency proper by to extremely technical cryptographic element.

Nevertheless, a YouTuber by the identify of ‘Crypto Casey’ has kindly and clearly put collectively a 30-minute rationalization for anybody wanting to grasp the fundamentals, utilizing Bitcoin for example. She even goes one additional to make comparisons to the present international monetary system, which for a lot of will assist be a part of the dots.

One other very helpful and simple to grasp article was additionally revealed by Forbes in April 2022 which says:

“Cryptocurrencies are likened to a digital type of an asset akin to gold, the place a perceived retailer of worth is then topic to the legal guidelines of provide and demand.”

Provide and demand of the digital asset (on this case Bitcoin, which is actually a string of numbers and letters that give every Bitcoin a singular id) requires a safe transaction and report of that transaction however with out the involvement of a central social gathering.

How is Bitcoin transferred securely between consumers and sellers?

The clue is within the title – ‘crypto’ foreign money referring to cryptography, which is the examine of safe communications strategies that permit solely the sender and meant recipient of a message to view its contents. That is achieved by way of an alternate of private and non-private encrypted ‘keys’. Keys are mathematically generated codes, developed in such an excessively difficult means that it’s nearly not possible to copy. As soon as the meant consumer receives that key it may be used to decrypt the message.

Finally, that is solely a part of the safe course of behind transferring ‘cash’. The transaction must be recorded on some form of ledger and that is the place Blockchain expertise is available in.

Blockchain

Blockchain is finally a shared database. Every consumer has a dwell copy of the database which could be up to date and distributed dwell, offering the credentials of the consumer making the change could be verified by the vast majority of the opposite customers. Blockchain isn’t checking the content material being up to date however quite the integrity of the consumer who’s doing the updating. That is completed utilizing what they name a consensus algorithm. That is achieved by way of encryption i.e., checking the suitable mixture of private and non-private encryption keys.

There’s a nice 30 minute Mckinsey podcast on blockchain which is price a pay attention. Additionally, a barely extra technical 10-minute sound-bite is offered from the Data Scientist podcast as effectively.

One such extensively used blockchain platform that’s described as a digital ledger for crypto foreign money (in the intervening time no less than) is the Ethereum.

You might also have heard of Bitcoin mining. That is primarily these people who carry out the aforementioned authentication to the ledger (i.e., fixing extremely advanced mathematical puzzles utilizing their computational energy) and as such are rewarded with Bitcoin funds.

Why would banks need to become involved in cryptocurrency?

There are a selection of the reason why monetary companies is likely to be cryptocurrency and blockchain. Not least due to its motion and worth available in the market with the likes of Bitcoin.

Additionally, the monetary market is held up by one thing known as monetary market infrastructure. These are central organizations that carry out important capabilities as a part of the monetary ecosystem. So, clearing homes and exchanges, for instance.

One such use case for blockchain could be that it removes these central our bodies for quite a lot of actions which might permit for transactions to be carried out in different methods that are probably extra aggressive. The entry to this knowledge may have main business benefits to avoid a compulsory a part of a commerce’s journey.

Examples of non-financial dangers to contemplate

Tech, knowledge, and cyber danger – the sooner referenced podcasts discuss how blockchain is actually good at authenticating a consumer and validating a change however not so good on the particular factor being modified. This evolution brings with it new knowledge, hardware, software program, and entry necessities and with that comes vulnerability and danger.

Local weather danger – the attainable non-financial dangers are a lot wider than some would possibly think about. As an illustration, blockchain expertise poses some important local weather danger give the sheer quantity of computing energy it takes. There are many articles on the market however this one from the Columbia Climate School talks about how Bitcoin now consumes extra electrical energy in a 12 months than the whole nation of Argentina!

Regulatory danger – there’s undoubtedly a rising regulatory focus on this area. In Europe for instance, the Markets in Crypto-assets (MiCA) Regulation is presently within the proposal stage and regarded as dwell within the coming 12 months or two. This represents the numerous progress regionally on this area. There’s a actually good HSBC 10-minute digi-talk podcast on this actual subject. A ‘Expensive CEO’ letter got here out in March 2022 from the UK Prudential Regulatory Authority (PRA) – Existing or planned exposure to cryptoassets. The letter is a comply with up from a high-level positioning letter in 2018 about managing danger on this area. It factors to a newly revealed 40-page focus doc from the BoE on Cryptoassets and decentralised finance and extra particularly the BoE’s responses from the discussion paper on new forms of digital money. There’s a lot of content material to digest however a number of preliminary observations:

Higher Focus – a two web page letter in 2018 in comparison with 86 pages of content material in 2022 – the PRA is recognising the fast progress within the area and that banks are starting to make a significant motion.

Higher danger administration – the PRA don’t formally endorse crypto property however the place companies do have exposures, they’ve expectations round danger administration and measurement towards the prevailing prudential framework. Banks are anticipated to take full account of their whole danger and adapt current danger administration methods and danger administration techniques to swimsuit the various danger profiles of crypto actions.

Worldwide coverage nonetheless excellent – e.g., BCBS are but to launch finalised place on crypto property which can alter the PRA place sooner or later.

Operational danger vs resilience – there is just one point out of resilience particularly within the letter with a higher give attention to operational danger as a key space to deal with. “Operational dangers are significantly related to sure crypto-related actions. As an illustration, some actions will expose companies to higher ranges of fraud or cyber dangers.”

Remaining ideas

You don’t should be a expertise wizard or an energetic investor in Bitcoin to understand the attainable danger right here. In essence, you have got a brand new foreign money that circumvents international monetary infrastructure and is quickly turning into one of the crucial helpful markets on the planet. How will this now finally turn out to be a danger to your group?

If you happen to assume that is only a banking-world factor, then assume once more. That is simply the place it begins. Each group might quickly be utilising crypto property or distributed ledger expertise (blockchain). There are such a lot of use-cases for non-financial sectors. If you happen to take heed to the podcasts referenced earlier you’ll hear a number of: from title deeds registers to weak individuals logs. That is actually scalable so take word!

The creator

Luke Hen FBCI CRISC is a world award-winning continuity and resilience skilled with 12 years’ expertise of danger administration in public sector and monetary companies. He’s presently specializing in expertise. Learn Luke’s weblog at https://resiliencerewire.co.uk

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#Altcoin #Bitcoin #BlockChain #BlockchainNews #Crypto

#Altcoin #Bitcoin #BlockChain #BlockchainNews #crypto #Blockchain #CryptoPress

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calumxkisses · 3 years

Text

Dancing In The Sky | a.i.

pairing: ashton irwin x reader

genre: fluff to angst

warnings: death (not main characters)

summary: request - Hi!!! It’s very morbid but, I really want one with ash or cal, where they’re in one of the boys house just the boys and their girls, and then the reader receive a call in the middle of the conversation telling someone in her family is dead and she just in shock and she tells them, and the he hugs her and she breaks!!! Thanks

a/n: recently my granny had to be rushed to the hospital and i thought i was going to lose her - luckly it didn't happen. i felt this request particularly close. i always say 'i love you' to my grandma before hunging up on the phone (we live pretty far away from each other) and i thought about what would happen if i forgot to say it, not knowing it would be for the last time. i'm sorry to anyone of you if this triggers you. i love you.

you should read this imagine while listening to: before you go

➳

The light coming in from the window on your right illuminates the whole room, it’s late afternoon but the sun shines almost as if it were noon. The scorching heat has now passed, there is a breeze that cools the air and spreads the scent of the grill in the garden, alternating the scent of grilled vegetables and steaks throughout the house. The pool water is still moving, the inflatable flamingo is wedged near the pool stairs and you can still see the tracks of Michael's wet feet near the diving board.

Halsey's songs are repeated at a low volume, but the guys sing them out loud and a smile forms on your face as you see how they are always ready to support their friends, not only publicly with tweets or instagram stories, but also in private, enjoying music like normal people do.

You hold onto the sweatshirt Ashton gave you as you grab your cell phone from the sofa and put it in your shorts pocket. Your hair is still wet from the shower you just took and it’s leaking few drops of water as you head outside, where your friends are starting to set the table for dinner.

You don't know how it happened, you have vague memories, but you feel grateful to have them around you, to have the opportunity to consider them as a second family, to be able to hug them and to be able to laugh with them. It is a fortune that not everyone has and you make sure you don't waste this opportunity.

“Honey!” Ashton yells, shaking his hand up and looking at you with an amused look. A few tufts of hair fall in front of his face and with one hand he tries to move them back, only to find them in front of his eyes again. His swimsuit is now dry, his chest is red from staying under the sun all day but his tattoos still manage to stand out in the tan and a huge smile covers his face.

Seeing him so happy, confident, at peace with his mind and in love with life, warms your heart and you almost feel like crying of joy in seeing him like this.

You wiped his tears, hugged him under the covers and held him a million times as his demons took over, when mirrors became enemies and food scared him.

You turned off his cell phone every time he read comments about his body and spent sleepless nights keeping him company while he vented his frustration by playing the drums.

You held out your hand to him while accompanying him in his battle against himself, you kissed him as he went through hell and his joy was worth every single tear.

You are proud of him, of the way he went back to wearing his favorite t-shirts and of the way he has come to love all his flaws, even though you're still sure he doesn't even have one.

As you leave the house, a cool breeze passes through your hair and you instinctively close your eyes to be able to appreciate the moment of coolness in the terrible heat of the last few days.

When you open your eyes, amazement takes over your body: the sky is not simply blue like the water in the pool you've been in all afternoon, but pink and orange clouds cover it completely; the sun hides behind them, tinges the sky with more intense colors and you feel your soul leave your body at the sight of so much beauty.

The sunset is so mesmerizing that you don't even feel the need to pick up your phone and take a picture of it, it's so beautiful that you're sure not even the best cameras would be able to capture such a marvel.

It’s a pink and orange sunset, bigger clouds are the backdrop to smaller more intense colors and the skyline of the city is slowly tinged with black, the lights of the buildings begin to see each other more and the world slows down as it prepares for the quietest hours.

The sunset arouses familiar, nostalgic, certainly not typical emotions in you; it’s so beautiful that you feel like you are living a dream, you pinch your arm lightly to make sure you are awake but Ashton's laugh reminds you that it is reality and, with that melody in the background, you understand that the difference between dream and reality is not that big.

And even if it were a dream, you know that dreaming never hurt anybody.

As the sunset surrounds you in a warm hug, a small white butterfly begins to flutter around you, spinning around and bringing a smile to your lips. The insect is small, but in the orange sky it stands out in an important way, making you feel like a Disney princess. You stretch your hand up, raising your forefinger and inviting the little butterfly to lean on it and, without fear, it leans on it, resting its wings and showing itself even more beautiful than you thought.

It’s white but at the corners of its wings it has black spots, its gaze seems to be directed towards you as its antennae move delicately. A sense of awe and wonder makes its way inside of you and you slowly bring the butterfly closer to you so you can admire it better, noticing how safe it continues to feel with you.

“Is everything alright?” Sierra asks as she sets the plates on the table, she's too busy to notice how you seem to be in symbiosis with the butterfly.

“Yeah.” You whisper while the insect continues to stay on your finger, motionless, leading you to feel a sense of peace in the moment you are living.

Suddenly, while the blue sky is giving its space to the dark night, the butterfly takes off and, after making another turn around you, heads towards the sky and merges with the lights of the stars.

You walk back to your friends, still confused about what just happened, and you see Michael trying to move the fire bowl to the corner of the pool. “Mike, if I were you I'd be more careful, you're not the luckiest person when it comes to fire.” You smile and you hear your friends laughing out loud as a grin appears on Michael's face.

“Don't worry, Crystal has seen enough tv shows about doctors to know what to do if I get burned again.” He replies looking at his girlfriend and laughing.

“Shut up and come here,” Crystal responds by pretending to be offended. “Dinner’s ready.” her lips try to hold back the smile that is forming on her face.

You sit on your boyfriend's lap while Luke sets the meat on the plates and Sierra pours the beer into your glass. Ashton pushes your hair to the side and kisses you on the neck, giving you goosebumps and getting winks from his friends.

“You’re terrible.” he replies while looking at them and squeezing his hands on your lap, his head resting on your back while he rolls his eyes and smiles. Everyone burst out laughing and the sound of their laughter still feels like the most beautiful melody to you.

As you are about to take your first bite, your phone starts ringing and vibrating inside the pocket of your shorts. You put your fork down and stand up, being careful not to trip over Ashton's feet as he gives you a questioning look. You give him a kiss on his head and you go away slightly from your group so you can hear better.

Your mother's voice is low as you bring the phone to your ear, a smile forms on your face to hear the sound of her voice but the world collapses on you a few seconds later, when her words become understandable while she cries.

The conversation is short-lived, it is mostly made up of your mother's sobs and words you never wanted to hear. Your mouth opens slightly and your heart seems to stop. And when she closes the call, you have a hard time figuring out if you are having a nightmare or if you are still in reality.

“Was that your lover on the phone?” Calum smiles as you stare at your phone screen as soon as you hang up the call. You look up and see everyone's gaze on you as your eyes start to pinch.

“It was my mother,” you take a deep sigh as you try to find the courage to speak. “My grandmother died a couple of hours ago. She's gone and-” and the words die in your mouth.

Your friends' smiles quickly transform as their brows rise and their eyes lose their light. Crystal is the first to hug you, in less than a second her arms are around you but it's all so surreal that you can't even find the strength to move your body. You hear whispers, but your ears are muffled as Ashton takes the place of your best friend and holds you close to his chest, kissing your hair and whispering words of comfort.

It all happens so fast that you struggle to metabolize, it seems to you that the whole world has stopped or is going too fast, it is hard to try to understand as your mind repeats your mother's words all over again.

You talked to your grandmother the day before, you described to her the weather and you told her all the projects you had in mind, including going to see her as soon as possible. She had told you some stories from her past because she knew how much you loved hearing stories from other times and then you said goodbye to her in a hurry because someone had rang the doorbell.

You didn't tell her you loved her and your heart breaks even more at the realization that she left without knowing the affection you felt for her.

Did she know you loved her? Did she know that she was the most important person to you? Did she know you were grateful for all the sacrifices she had made to make you happy? Did she know you were proud of her? Did she know you loved the way she kissed your hands? Did she know how much you cared about her? Or did she pass wondering if you loved her?

If that were the case, you would never forgive yourself.

Part of you, however, is aware that behind those wrinkles and trembling hands, there were years of wisdom and intelligence and that, even when she was sick, she knew that you loved her unconditionally.

You still remember how she was the one who taught you to ride a bike when your parents were too busy working, how her hunched back bent even more as she pushed you along the street outside your childhood house, letting you go on your own when you learned, while still lying to you about how her hands were attached to the bike, to make you feel protected.

You certainly still remember the way she bragged about you, how she proudly used to tell all the ladies at the grocery store that you were her niece, her greatest joy and the best gift she ever received.

And, if you close your eyes and focus, you can still feel the warmth of the old fireplace in her home, of her hands holding yours while your face was resting on her shoulder. You can still hear the sound of burning wood, of her sweet voice singing melodies belonging to past eras while, between one verse and another, her lips kissed your head and whispered words of love.

Most of all, you have memories of how her arms wrapped around your little body when there was a thunderstorm, when the screams inside your house got too loud and when you saw her again after weeks, with your hearts coming back to beat in unison and your lungs beginning to breathe again.

Now that she is gone, who would be by your side? Who would teach you to cook and sew?

You would no longer hear her heart beating when you leaned against her chest, you would no longer hear the sound of her breaths when you slept next to her, you would no longer wake up with the smell of the flowers she grew and, above all, her dry, wrinkled lips would no longer whisper “I love you” to you.

All the fights, all the moments when you were bothered by her calls and all your snorting about the boredom of being with her bring a pang to your heart that tastes of guilt and arrogance, of shame and wasted moments that won't come back.

She was now gone, her heart had beaten for the last time and her eyes had stopped shining and the more time passes, the more her absence starts to hurt.

While your friends are around you to not leave you alone and Ashton hugs you tightly while caressing your hair, everything seems to start to make sense: the butterfly that just moments before had leaned on your hand, the sunset so beautiful and intense - she was there, she was giving you her last goodbye with all the delicacy possible.

She was reassuring you that she will always be there for you, that she will be in the sunsets under which you will fall asleep and that she will be the butterflies that will fly around in the sky, to reassure you that everything’s gonna be alright.

And with this new certainty and a weight in your chest that will slowly go away, you let yourself go, the tears begin to roll down your face and the sobs echo in the silence of the evening, as the stars light up the sky and God gains a new angel.

Ashton knows it won't be easy, that it will be months before that pain will become more bearable and that family lunches and dinners will be harder, that that empty chair around the table will be a stab in the heart every time.

But he also knows that you are strong, that you will be able to overcome everything, that sadness will turn into a smile when you’ll remember her and that, whatever happens, in a way or another, he will always be there next to you, just like your grandma used to be.

—

#5 seconds of summer imagines #5 seconds of summer imagine #5sos imagine #5sos imagines #ashton irwin x reader #ashton irwin imagine #ashton 5 seconds of summer #ashton irwin imagines #ashton irwin #ashton irwin x you #ashton 5sos #ashton fletcher irwin #calum 5sos #calum 5 seconds of summer #michael 5sos #michael 5 seconds of summer #luke 5sos #luke hemmings

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felassan · 3 years

Text

Some DA trivia and dev commentary from Twitter

There’s a lot of different tweets, so I’m just pasting and linking to the source rather than screencapping them all or making several different posts or something. Post under cut for length.

User: Was dragon age 2 your favourite in the franchise?

David Gaider: DA2 was the project where my writing team was firing on all cylinders, and they wrote like the wind- because they had to! Second draft? Pfft. Plot reviews? Pfft. I was so proud of what we all accomplished in such a brief time. I didn't think it was possible. [source] DA2 is, however, also where the goal posts kept moving. Things kept getting cut, even while we worked. I had to write that dialogue where Orsino turned even if you sided with him, because his boss battle had been cut and there was no time to fix the plot. A real WTF moment. >:( [source]

Mike Rousseau: I remember bugging that! And then being told it wasn't a bug, and being so confused. Doing QA for DA2 was an experience. Trial by fire. [source]

DG: So I think it's safe to say DA2 is my favorite entry in the DA franchise and also the sort of thing I never want to live through ever again. Mixed feelings galore. [source]

User: (I personally blame whoever it was for ruining most romance arcs in other games for me; they don't live up to Fenris's romance storyline)

DG: I wrote Fenris, so uh - me, I guess? Or maybe his cinematic designer, who put in the puppy dog eyes. [source]

User: If DA2 had just been an expansion, do you think it would have been better received? There was a lot of great stuff in there, and I think my initial dislike of it was because of the zone reuse. If it hadn't needed to be a full game, would that issue not have arisen?

DG: Hard to say. It was either going to be an over-scoped expansion or an under-scoped sequel. If it had stayed an expansion, it might never have received the resources/push it DID get. [source]

User: I'd love to visit the universe where you had an extra year or so to work on it. You did a very good job as it stands, but it definitely had rough edges. Not just the writing team either. The whole game had hit and miss moments, that just a little more dev time could have fixed.

DG: On one hand, DA2 existed to fill a hole in the release schedule. More time was never in the cards. DA2 was originally planned as an expansion! On the other, if we had more time, would we have started doing that thing where we second guess/iterate ourselves into mediocrity? [shrug emoji] [source]

Jennifer Hepler: This is what I love about DA2. Personally, I greatly prefer something that's rough and raw and sincere to something that's had all the soul polished out of it. Extra time would have helped for art and levels, but it would have lost something too. [source]

DG: Right? I think we could have used some time for peer reviews (and fewer cuts), but I think the rawness of the writing lent a certain spark that we usually polished out. [source]

JH: Definitely. I think the structure (more character-driven) and the tightness of the timeframe let each individual writer's voice really come through. Polish can be very homogenizing. [source]

DG: I should add I'm not, by any means, against iteration. Some iteration is good and necessary. The problem that BioWare often had is that we never knew when to stop. Like a goldfish, we would fill the space given to us by constantly re-iterating on things that were "good enough". [source]

Patrick Weekes: I appreciate your incredibly diplomatic use of the past tense on "had". :D [source]

User: DA2 was my gateway into the series and I’m so happy it is. I love the game the way that it is. It’s one of my favorites of all time. But I am also aware of everything that was said here. If it were remastered, do you think it would change?

DG: I'd be surprised if it was ever remastered. If it was, do you really think they'd change things? Do remasters do that? No idea. [source]

User: Both sides got undercut as I recall. Didn't that whole sequence also end with the mage leader embracing blood magic? It was very much "a plague on both your houses" moment, at least for me.

DG: Yep. Orsino was supposed to have his own version of Meredith's end battle, which only happened if you sided with the templars. That got cut, but the team still wanted to use the model we'd made for him. So... that happened. [source]

DG: I would personally say that DA2 is a fantastic game hidden under a mountain of compromises, cut corners, and tight deadlines. If you can see past all that, you'll see a fantastic game. I don't doubt, however, that it's very difficult for most to do that. [source]

PW: I love DAI with all my selfish "I worked on this" heart, but DA2's follower arcs and relationships are probably my favorite in the series. [source]

User: As I've expressed many times, I love the game, especially it's writing and characters but, for me, the most impressive aspect of it, in consideration of it's lack of time for drafts and revisions, is the 2nd act with Arishok. What amazingly complex character and fantastic duel

User: Just played it again and I have to agree. Though he is bound by the harsher tenants of the Qun, he makes valid points about free marcher society. Though it is obvious that he and Hawke will come to blows eventually, the tension builds gradually and understandably

DG: Luke did such a fantastic job with the Arishok I found myself sometimes wishing the Qunari plot had just been THE plot. [source]

User: What do you think would have changed, story wise, if you had more time for DA2?

DG: I would have taken out that thing where Meredith gets the idol. It was forced on me because she needed to be "super-powered" with red lyrium for her final battle. Being "crazy", however, robbed her side of the mage/templar argument of any legitimacy. I hated hated hated that. [source]

User: I deeply lament that there wasn't/couldn't be some sort of DA2 equivalent of Throne of Bhaal's Ascension mod.

DG: I'd have done it, if DA2 had allowed for anything but the most rudimentary of modding. ;) [source]

User: I mean, and I think I understand where you were trying, but how much legitimacy did the Templars and her as top Templar have after they're keeping the mages locked up against their will in the old slave quarters? Feel free to not reply.

DG: I think it's the kind of discussion which requires nuance, and which discussions on the Internet are not prone to. [source]

User: Was a compromise that the quest lines don’t branch? It felt like it was supposed to be that way but then you end up in the same place later regardless of what you pick. Like I hoodwinked the templars so good to help the apostates escape but in Act II they were caught anyway.

DG: I remember us having a lot more branching in the initial planning yes. Most of this got trimmed out in the first or second wave of cuts, in an effort to not cut the plots altogether. [source]

DG: "If you could Zack Snyder DA2, what would you change?" Wow. I'm willing to bet Mark or Mike (or anyone else on the team) would give very different answers than me, but it's enough to give a sober man pause, because that was THE Project of Multiple Regrets. [source] I mean, it's the most hypothetical of hypotheticals. It's never gonna happen. I wouldn't be surprised if EA considered DA2 its embarrassing red-headed stepchild. We'd also need to ignore that in many ways DA2 was as good as it was bad BECAUSE of how it was made. But that aside? [source] First, either restore the progressive changes to Kirkwall we'd planned over the passing of in-game years or reduce the time between acts to months instead of years... which, in hindsight, probably should have been done as soon as the progressive stuff was cut. [source] I'm sure you're like "get rid of repeated levels!" ...but I don't care about that. All I wanted was for Kirkwall to feel like a bigger city. Way more crowded. More alive! Fewer blood mages. [source] I'd want to restore the plot where a mage Hawke came THIS close to becoming an abomination. An entire story spent trapped in one's own head while trapped on the edge of possession. Why? Because Hawke is the only mage who apparently never struggles with this. It was a hard cut. [source]

User: I would LOVE to hear more details about this! I don’t suppose there’s any chance of a short story?

DG: I don't even remember the details of the story, sorry. There was a fight, and you caught the bad guy and then realized none of it was real and woke up idk [source]

DG: I'd want to restore all those alternate lines we cut, meaning people forget they'd met you. Or that they knew you were a mage. Or, oh god, that maybe they'd romanced you in DAO. So much carnage. [source] I'd want to restore the Act 3 plots we cut only because they were worked on too late, but which would have made the buildup to the mage/templar clash less sudden. Though I don't remember what they were, now. Some never got beyond being index cards posted on the wall. [grimace emoji] [source] As I mentioned elsewhere, I'd want to restore Orsino's end battle so he wouldn't need to turn on you even if you sided with him. And I'd want an end fight with the templars that didn't require Meredith to have red lyrium and go full Tetsuo. [source] Heck, maybe an end decision where you sided with neither the mages nor the templars. Because it certainly ended up feeling like you could brand both sides as batshit pretty legitimately, no? That was never planned, tho. No idea how to make that feel like an actual path atm. [source] Maybe an option to go "umm, Anders... what are you DOING?" 👀 [source] And, of course, a Varric romance, because Mary took that "slimy car salesman" character we'd planned and did the impossible with him. I can feel Mary glaring at me for even suggesting this, tho. [source] Lastly, the original expanded opening to the game which allowed you to spend time with Bethany and Carver BEFORE the darkspawn attacked. And, um, that's about it off the top of my head. Zack Snyder, WHAT PANDORA'S BOX HAVE YOU OPENED. [source] Shit, I remembered two more things: 1) Restore the "Varric exaggerates the heck out of the story" at the beginning of every Act, until Cassandra calls him on it. Yes, that was a thing. 2) Make DA: Exodus. Yes, I am still bitter. [source] God damn it, I meant "Make DA: Exalted March". The DA2 expansion, NOT Exodus since that was DA2's original name and makes no sense. Because the expansion ended with Varric dying, and that will always be on my "things left undone" list. [source]

User: Whaaaat?

DG: Well, you know that scene in Wrath of Khan where Spock goes into the dilithium chamber because he's a Vulcan? Well, imagine that but with Varric and red lyrium and because he's a dwarf. ;) [source]

John Epler: I distinctly remember referencing the bit from MGS4 where you crawl through the microwave corridor in the split screen, while cinematic battle rages on the other half. [source]

DG: It would have been glorious, John. Glorious. [source]

JE: I don't think I've ever been so certain what a shot should look like as I did Hawke coming in and finding Varric in the broken throne, just like when he was telling Cassandra his story. [source]

DG: It would have come full circle! Auggghh, it still kills me. [source]

User: Lord, you folks are a little too good at this.

JE: The true secret behind videogame narrative is knowing how to make yourself seem a lot more clever than you actually are. [source] 'Oh, we TOTALLY planned that.' [source]

User: Ok, this thread [the DA2 regrets thread, which is the big chunks above] but Inquisition.

DG: My regrets about Inquisition are, more or less, the normal kind. Nothing so dramatic, I'm afraid. [source]

User: You can keep your Varric romance, I want a Flemeth romance goddamnit!

DG: I would allow for one flirt option, and then a recording of Kate Mulgrew laughing for three minutes straight. [source]

User: I had a hypothesis about the repetitive caves in DA2. They're repetitive because it's Varric telling the story and he didn't consider them important. They're like sets in a play. (Okay, I really suspect it was a time/money/resources thing but I like my fake explanation better.)

DG: Hang a lampshade on it, maybe? Cassandra: "But that's the exact cave you were in last time?" Varric: "Whatever. They all look the same, I'm not THAT kind of dwarf. Can we move on?" [source]

User: that makes sense, hypothetically to make Varric romanceable and keep his arc—that had to happen for the main plot—I imagine you would have to make double the content (or more)? which would've been a tall order given the time/budget constraints the game was under

DG: Right. When it comes to "romance arc" vs. "follower story arc", we generally only had time to do one or the other. Never both. Romancing Varric would have meant not getting the story of his that you did. [source]

Mary Kirby: The one exaggeration I really, REALLY wanted, that we never got to do was Varric narrating his own death scene with Hawke weeping over him, then cutting to Cassandra's pissed off glaring at him. [source]

DG: Haha! The one I wanted was Varric's plot where he takes on the baddies single-handedly, sliding across the floor like Jet Lee, action movie-style, until finally Cassandra gets irritated and he has to admit Hawke & the rest of the party showed up to help. [source]

MK: We did that one! (He didn't do any Jet Lee moves, though.) Jepler gave him letterboxing to get The Good, the Bad, & the Ugly showdown vibes while he shot a ton of mooks single-handed. [source]

DG: Wow. Shows how much I remember. [source]

JE: I found it! I remember seeing this sequence as my treat for doing a bunch of much more challenging work. It was fun to see how far I could push our limited library of animations. [link] [source]

DG: Heh awesome. I could have sworn it was cut, honestly. I think I was even in that meeting. [source]

User: no disrespect but that’s surprising and rich of Mary “Hard in Hightown” Kirby to think DA2 shouldn’t have had a Varric romance when she wrote an entire book of Varric’s self-insert character pining over his Hawke insert character… HIH is the reason we had VHawke Summer 2018

DG: I can't *really* speak for Mary, or how she feels about it now compared to back then. I only know how she felt about it back then, and I'm not sure it was as much the concept of the romance but that Varric's entire story would be bent to "romance arc" ...a very different thing. [source]

JH: I remember pushing to have the first DLC start with Hawke having an option to ask Varric, "Did you tell Cassandra about us?" and if you picked it, Varric would answer, "Of course not, baby. I told her you were sleeping with X..." and then proceed as if you had had a full romance. [source]

DG: I still wonder how that would have gone over. x) [source]

JE: Okay, one more DA2 thing. Putting together the cinematics for this scene was a blast. [link] [source]

MK: These lines are my greatest legacy. I want "Make sure the world knows I died... at Chateau Haine!" inscribed on my tombstone. [source]

JE: I was so glad no one said 'no' to the crane shot. [source]

MK: It needs that crane shot. It's the perfect icing on that cake made from solid cheese. [source]

DG: The designers were all "we need more combat" and I think we were all "I think you underestimate just HOW interesting we can make this dinner party". [source]

JE: And finally. I think @SherylChee wrote the one-liner. I think we had a collection of like, 20. [link] [source]

Sheryl Chee: Yeah! Something like that! I remember submitted a whole bunch and Frank said you only needed one. Wish I'd kept the other fifteen. [source]

JE: A random chooser where, each time through the scene, you get a different one-liner. [source]

JE: DA2 is the project I'm the proudest of. I also absolutely get that it didn't land for a lot of people. But I don't think it's inaccurate to say that, in a lot of ways, DA2 defined my career. [source] Everyone spent a year working at their maximum ability. I was a fresh cinematic designer and was given all of Varric's content, as well as the Act 1 Finale mission. It was a lot for someone who had been doing the Cinematics thing for literally 6 months. [source] There's some stuff in there I can't look at without wincing. And there's some stuff I'm genuinely proud of. Not to mention, it was my introduction to most of the writing team. Several of whom I'm still working with today! Albeit in a different capacity [source] Also, weirdly, one of my most enduring memories of Dragon Age 2 is how much Bad Company 2 we'd play at lunch. It was a LOT. [source] Every game I've worked on has a game I played attached to it. ME2 is Borderlands. DA2 is Bad Company 2. DAI is DayZ. I, hmm. There's a progression there. I don't know how I feel about it. [source]

User: Is DA4 going to be tarkov then?

JE: I've kind of churned out of Tarkov for now. Probably Hunt Showdown, at least right now. [source]

User: I think people also don't take nuance into consideration -- like I FULLY acknowledge the flaws in my favorite games and will openly criticize them, but that doesn't mean they're not my favorite games anymore??? You can like and thing and still be critical of it.

JE: A lot of my favourite shit is deeply flawed! I acknowledge it and I think it's interesting to dissect the flaws. [source]

User: I still wish Justice was an actual character in DA2 rather than a plot point.

DG: There was a moment during DAI where we *almost* put in you running into Justice with the Grey Wardens, and he's all "Kirkwall? I never went to Kirkwall" [source]

User: Does that imply that Justice was shoehorned in to DA2?

DG: Nah, it was an in-joke where we thought it'd be fun to suggest that "Justice" was simply some demon that tricked Anders in DA2. Wooo those tricky demons! We didn't do it, though. [source]

User: [about templars] except, I don't think it had very much legitimacy to begin with. keep in mind, we interact with other characters with the same argument. The one that comes to mind is Cullen, a sane templar in power. The templar's side of the argument is inherently flawed.

DG: I don't doubt that many people agree with you, and yet people can and do argue on behalf of the templars as well. My place isn't to pick a side, but to provide evidence that players can interpret for themselves [source]

User: Can you shed some light for us on how DA was able to do multiple same-sex romance options for different genders but the Mass Effect team treated them like the plague? What process existed for your team that just wasn't their for the other tentpole franchise?

DG: Different people making the decisions, almost different cultures. I don't know what it's like now, but for many years the Mass Effect team and the Dragon Age team were almost like two different studios working within the same building. [source]

User: It truly boggles the mind. Kudos for doing demonstrably better on consistent queer representation than the ME teams. Y'all never needed us to make petitions to try to get the studio's attention and ask them to do better by us. That's the fight we're once again embroiled in now.

DG: Honestly, I don't feel like tut-tutting the Mass Effect team. They did their part, and if they were a bit later to the show than the DA team they certainly did more than almost every other game out there -- and willingly. [source]

Updates begin here

User: So what was the reason for naming Dragon age 2 "Dragon age II" and not using a subtitle?

DG: As I recall, that was purely a publisher decision. I think they wanted to avoid the impression it was an expansion. [source]

User: Is there no chance of ever remaking DA2 under better circumstances? -Somehow remove the repetitiveness of gameplay by making changes and updating the tech and adding much more to the storyline. It could almost be a new very exciting game.

DG: I'd say there's zero chance of that. Let's keep our hopes up for the next DA title instead. [source]

User: I am a little confused here, help me out here please! How exactly was the cut boss battle with Orsino supposed to work out? How it would've kept him from turning against the player?

DG: It means that, if you sided with the templars, the entire boss bottle at the end would have been against Orsino and the mages. No fight against Meredith. The end decision would have been more divergent. [source]

User: I do remember that one of the reasons going around for that, was that resources were going to the transition to Frostbite. I'm still not fully sold on that having been a good choice. I felt that more time should have been given for that transition considering it was made for FPSs

DG: We didn't transition to Frostbite until DAI. Given our time frame for DA2, I don't think we *could* have transitioned to a new engine. [source]

User: Since your talking about the what could have been for DA2. Could you say what your script was for Anthem? Cause I remember reading that you wrote the plot on that game.

DG: I created a setting for Anthem and scripted out a plot - but, as I understand it, almost none of that ended up being used. So it's a bit pointless to talk about what I'd planned, as that'd be for some completely different type of game. [source]

User: [in reference to the exchange above where DG said “Being "crazy", however, robbed her side of the mage/templar argument of any legitimacy. I hated hated hated that.” re: Meredith] except, I don't think it had very much legitimacy to begin with. keep in mind, we interact with other characters with the same argument. The one that comes to mind is Cullen, a sane templar in power. The templar's side of the argument is inherently flawed.

If I missed a tweet, got the wrong source link or included a tweet twice, feel free to let me know and I’ll correct.

Edit / Update: Post update 22nd April

#dragon age #bioware #video games #fenris #the Fenaissance #long post #longpost #cassandra pentaghast #my lady paladin #dragon age 4 #the dread wolf rises #da4 #mass effect

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boimgfrog · 3 years

Text

hey @pantoranprincess i uh. i wrote it <3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139768

full fic under the cut

The two men were seated at a table, enjoying lunch despite the… cozy size of Luke’s office. Conversation flowed easily, albeit mostly one-sided.

“anyways, that’s when I saw Obi-Wan, my first master-” Luke paused, noticing Din’s helmet tilt slightly at the name, “you do know who Obi-Wan was, right?”

Din froze, not expecting the Jedi to pick up on his confusion, “the name sounds familiar… Bo-Katan mentioned him once,” he took a sip from his straw, “said he was a sister-seducing- man-whore? Was he some kind of escort?”

He waited as his words washed over Luke. The jedi blinked twice, a smile flickering past his lips.

“yes,” Luke nodded, “he was, excellent job,” he spooned more soup into his own bowl, hiding his smile behind its large spoon.

“and he was your master?” Din asked, tilting his head forward.

“mhmm,” Luke set the spoon back into the bowl, matching din’s gaze through his lashes, “taught me everything he knew,”

Din coughed, turning his attention back towards his lunch. he sipped at it, ignoring the blush that crept under his helmet.

The jedi huffed, eyes twinkling. Something told Din that maybe, just maybe, he’d lied about the Obi-wan thing.

-><-

The back of Luke’s head hit the ground, pulling a wheeze from his body. Above him, Din stood poised, cradling a very fussy green toddler. He extended a hand toward the fallen jedi, but Luke waved him off, leaning up on his elbows.

“’s nothing, no offense but,” he gestured to Grogu, who had calmed down some, “he’s no Vader, I’ll be fine,” this time, he accepted Din’s hand, hardly dwelling on how easily he pulled him up.

“Vader?” Din asked, shifting the baby to his hip, and pocketing the darksaber he’d previously been using.

Luke looked up at the Mandalorian, tilting his head with a smile, “Darth Vader? The emperor’s right-hand man?”

Din’s helmet betrayed to hint of recognition. Unbelievable. No way, there’s no way he was this clueless.

“big cape, scary helmet? Red lightsaber?” Luke tried, wracking his brain.

“oh, you mean like the guy on those old recruitment posters?”

“those- the recruitment posters?”

Din nodded, “I’d see ‘em plastered up in bars and stuff, back before the empire fell,”

Recruitment posters. Din, one of the best bounty hunters Luke had ever met, king of Mandalore himself, had only heard of Darth Vader via recruitment posters. Luke felt his chest flutter. He nodded along with whatever Din said next, mind elsewhere. If he hadn’t heard of Darth Vader… what else had he managed to miss?

-><-

“Din!” Luke called from down the hallway, footsteps tripping as he ran inside Din’s ship, “Din! My sister’s here,” he said, knocking on the solid metal hull, “She wants to meet you!” his voice made it sound like an important event, though Din could hardly see why exchanging niceties with the sister of a backwater jedi warranted such flare.

“mm,” Din pulled back the door, peering down at Luke who was bouncing on his toes, “why?”

Luke ignored him, grabbing Din by his gloved hand, and dragging him towards his office, “this could be a big opportunity for you,” he rattled on, eyes shining beneath his mess of dust-streaked hair, “it’s good for you to make connections like this, given your newly-found title-”

“connections?” Din interrupted, “what do you mean?”

Luke spared a confused glance back at the Mandalorian, still steadily walking him towards his sister, “my sister? Leia Organa?”

Din offered up no response, but Luke was enamored by it nonetheless. He could understand not knowing much about galactic history, after all, he was under the impression that Din lead a particularly... sheltered childhood. But things that were happening now? The new republic?

“she was the princess of Alderaan? She helps lead the New Republic?”

“Alderaan...” Din paused, “that’s the one that blew up, right?”

“yes,” Luke dropped Din’s hand, unhooking the tarp that shielded his office from view, “yes, it’s the one that blew up,”

“mm,” Din hummed thoughtfully, “is she a jedi too?”

“sort of, I’ve been helping her train,” Luke said, checking his hair in the gleam of Din’s helmet.

“must’ve been why they blew up Alderaan then,” Din held still, “they were trying to kill her before she got too powerful,”

Luke’s hands stilled. He stared up into the Mandalorian’s visor, “huh,” he said, unable to stop his lips from twitching, “maybe so,” Luke turned around, brushing the tarp aside for Din to enter, hiding his smile behind the fabric.

-><-

It was almost cute, how little Din seemed to know about the galaxy he lived in. it didn’t really matter, of course. Most of it was just history lessons, nothing that would seriously impede him on a mission or in battle. And he wasn’t stupid by any means. He could speak more languages than Luke could count on his hands, flesh and robotic, and had flight skills that could rival even the most trained X-wing pilot. Still, it was hard not to feel fond when the Mandalorian only just now realized that Luke and Leia were twins.

“how was I supposed to know!”

“Din, starlight, our father would’ve been found out the second one of us was born, how exactly did you think he managed to swerve the jedi code to have another baby?”

“listen-” Din huffed, biting back his argument when he saw how ecstatic Luke was over this whole ordeal. Luke only nodded along expectantly, crossing one leg over the other. He was nothing if not encouraging.

“to be fair,” Din started, scowling at Luke’s twinkling smile, “she’s a princess, and you grew up on Tatooine,” he huffed, “and you never mentioned your dad was a jedi,” he added quickly, hoping Luke would miss it in his euphoria. No such luck.

“Din,” Luke stood up, reaching to cradle the Mandalorian’s helmet in his hands, “Anakin Skywalker? Did you think that was a coincidence?”

“it’s a big galaxy, there’s like half a billion ‘Djarin’s out there,” Din answered, but the bite had left his voice. It was hard to be frustrated when Luke was so close, all soft smiles and saying “Din” like it was a prayer.

Din leaned into the jedi’s touch. He’d blame it on the weight of his helmet later, and Luke would play along, teasingly offering to hold the helmet if it ever got too heavy. It was only ever teasing though. Luke never asked for more than Din was willing to give.

-><-

They were pressed together, Din’s arm wrapped lazily around Luke’s waist, the jedi’s head leaning against his cold, armored shoulder. The beaches on Luke’s planet were nothing special, but the sunsets, oh the sunsets were spectacular. Grogu had been poking at Luke’s brain all day, playing memories of beach days on coruscant and building sandcastles with the crechemasters, until Luke finally caved and suited the baby up for a day in the water, inviting Din along.

Grogu had the time of his life, taking turns force-throwing sand at his dad and splashing his master until they joined in the fun. After a full day of entertaining the little gremlin, though, the two men had decided to impose Nap Time on the kiddo, sprawling out together on one of the many beach towels Luke had brought. (“you didn’t grow up on Tatooine, Din. Trust me, sand gets everywhere”)

The baby was fast asleep against Din’s armor, wrapped up so his head didn’t get bruised by the beskar.

“this was nice, huh?” Luke asked, shifting to look up at the Mandalorian. His eyes brushed over the thin stripe of exposed facial hair before he pulled his gaze away, embarrassed. Even the smallest of glimpses got his heart racing. Ridiculous, honestly.

“mhmm,” Din absentmindedly rubbed circles on Grogu’s back with his thumb, “could’ve done without all the sand in my armor, though,”

Luke laughed, “ugh I know,” he shifted again, pulling his arms from the poncho he was wearing, “I always get so much sand and dust in my hand, it’s the worst,”

Din tilted his helmet, “in your hand?”

“yeah,” Luke fiddled with his glove, pulling it off before tugging on one of his fingers, revealing the intricate system of wires, “you didn’t know?”

Din knew he was staring, and he knew that wasn’t polite but he just- “you’re… part droid?”

Luke laughed at that, a full, hearty laugh, one that had him gasping for air and rolling on his back. Din reached for his hand, holding it up so that it didn’t hit the sand as Luke fell back.

“yes,” Luke said, catching his breath, “I suppose that’s one way to put it,” he flicked his finger again, closing the wiring hatch. Din hadn’t removed his hand, so Luke twisted their fingers together, “you really didn’t know?”

“how was I supposed to?”

“the lifting things six times my weight didn’t tip you off?”

Din sputtered, “you’re a jedi??? You lift things six times your weight all the time???”

That got Luke laughing again, eyes twinkling in the setting sun. He was teasing Din, yes, but he was also so, so deeply fond of him. This, Luke asking questions, Din answering truthfully even though it made him look silly, this was everything to Luke. Luke trusted the Mandalorian, of course he did, and this made Luke feel like Din trusted him as well. just the thought alone was enough to make the Jedi smile wider, letting his head fall against the Mandalorian’s shoulder once more.

-><-

Luke paced around Din’s ship. It was bigger than his last one, and somehow even harder to navigate.

“Din, where’s your holoprojector?” Luke had promised to tell Leia when they were getting close, and they’d be closing in on Coruscant within the hour.

“don’t have one,” came the response from the dashboard, stopping Luke in his tracks.

“don’t- do you at least have a data pad?” no holoprojector? Maybe Din was poorer than Luke thought.

“yeah,” Din shuffled around for a moment, before handing Luke a beat-up data pad that was at least a century old.

“Din this thing is ancient,” he said, frowning at the actual layer of crust on the screen, “does it even have holonet?”

“nope,”

“wh-“ Luke was dumbfounded, “how do you get your news? What if something big happens??”

“if I need to know it, someone will tell me,” Din said as if it was the most obvious thing in the galaxy, but the thought left Luke reeling.

“Din, starlight, you didn’t know who Darth Vader was,”

“I did so-”

“yeah, from recruitment posters-”

“it still counts-”

“no it doesn’t-”

They fought like that for a moment, back and forth, until it dawned on Luke.

“holy stars,” he said, cutting Din’s rant short, “Din, is this why you didn’t know about Obi-Wan? And Anakin being my father? And Leia and the new republic?” Luke sat down in the co-pilot’s seat, scooping up Grogu and setting him in his lap.

Din grumbled, turning his attention back to hyperspace, “it wasn’t important,”

“starlight it was Darth Vader-”

The two started arguing again, bickering in that old married couple kind of way. Luke couldn’t help but smile at the situation. All this time, all these silly little accidents and conversations, all because the Mandalorian hadn’t bothered to install a holoprojector in his ship. It was amazing, really.

“I don’t see what the big deal is, you don’t know anything about Mandalorian culture,”

“Din no one knows anything about Mandalorian culture,”

Din slumped in his seat, hands gripping loosely at the steering controls. Luke leaned forward, bumping the Mandalorian’s with his head until Din faced him, pressing their foreheads together softly.

“hey,” Luke said in hushed tones, “for the record, I thought it was kinda hot,”

Din let out a breathy laugh, pulling back slightly to look in the jedi’s eyes.

“that says more about you than it does me, Skywalker,”

Luke matched his laugh, Din joining in before resting his forehead against Luke’s again. They were gonna get an earful from Leia when they landed without a party to welcome them, but for now they would simply rest, all shiny armor and gentle curls, bathed in the glow of hyperspace.

#jay writes #is that the tag i use?#i dont remember #star wars #dinluke #the mandalorian #the mandalorian spoilers #din djarin #luke skywalker #jay says a thing #i'm not in love w it but i do think it's cute so #baby yoda #grogu #he is also in this

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