#it's funnier when you realize both the episodes these are from

[mimiscappinisideblog]

They're talking

#up to mischievous shit probably #it's funnier when you realize both the episodes these are from #are the 11th episode of season 1 of each show #mimi talks #the batman 2004 #The Penguin #Oswald Cobblepot #Otto Octavius #Doc Ock #tssm Otto #tssm

[peterman-spideyparker]

Pure (Matt Murdock x Fem!Virgin!Reader)

Author’s Note: Well, everyone, I’ve strapped on my slut pants for this one. How I got this idea, I don’t know. All I know is that I had it, wrote it, needed to take a cold shower in the middle of writing it, and finished it. I think it’s even a little funnier after this last episode of She-Hulk, especially since I wrote it before I saw it. Is this self-serving? Yes. Is this also the perfect alternative fic option for me to include a gif of Bed Matt™️ when I wanted to but didn’t for another fic? Also yes. Enjoy, sluts (affectionate)! :)

Summary: After Matt overhears a conversation between you and Karen, his feelings that he holds for you already take on a new life, and his thoughts won’t rest until he sees them through.

Warnings: Fluff, mutual friends pining but neither of them know it until they know it, swearing, smut (virgin reader, nervous/excited reader, oral - f!receiving, fingering, sloppy kisses, P in V, praise kink! praise kink!, soft!dom!Matt (did I use that right?), Communication King Murdock, light corruption kink?, unprotected sex--if I’m gonna do a corruption kink, I might as well go all the way on it), cutesy cuteness because I just love seeing Matt happy.

Other Characters: Foggy Nelson and Karen Page

Word Count: 5,957

Matt’s not sure what word he’d use to describe you—one single term seems impossible to ascribe. Every time he tries to think of one, it never seems to capture your essence. You’re the furthest thing from selfish, and you only want to help those around you. You’re like light, a soothing breeze on a warm summer day.

One day, he’s talking with Father Lantom, finally having taken the old priest up on his offer of a latte at a chat. When the word “pure” falls from his lips, Matt immediately thinks of you—your kindness, your laugh, your optimism, and your heart. Everything about you is pure, and only enhances every last thing that you do. 

But when Matt overhears you talking with Karen the following week, both Foggy and him up to their necks in casework, he comes to realize just how true that connotation is.

“So,” you hum, a lithe tone up-pitching your voice. “How’s everything going with you and Frank.”

Karen blushes and laughs, shaking her head as she files paperwork while you print. “We’re doing good. We went to Coney Island last night.”

“Cute. Did he win you a giant stuffed animal?”

“Actually, yeah. A giant frog.”

“That’s so sweet, I think I’m gonna get a cavity from the story. A full night just playing carnival games?”

“Well, we kind of cut it short. We went back to my place, and, well.”

It takes a second for it to click for you. “Oh.”

“C’mon, (Y/N)! You know how it is. That giddy excitement, especially when you haven’t had a chance to see one another in a long time. You get handsy with each other, he whispers something in your ear . . .”

You nervously clear your throat, and Matt can hear you nod your head as you work to organize the papers printing on the braille machine. Your heart is racing. “Y-Yeah,” you breathe. “Of course.”

Karen notices your shift in tone. “(Y/N), you have done it, haven’t you?”

“Well, um . . .”

“Oh, I didn’t mean it like that. I—,” she tries to backpedal.

“No, Kare, it’s fine. It’s just something I’ve done yet, that’s all.”

“Can I ask why?” she asks hesitantly.

Matt can hear you shrug. 

“It’s a big step,” you say softly. “And I don’t know . . .”

“Is it like a religion thing, or—?”

“No.” You pause, unsure how to explain your mentality, mortified when your brain plays a ‘What if?’ situation with the idea and your crush on Matt. “If I’m not good at it or . . . I don’t know. It’s the idea that they could just leave the next day because they don’t like me anymore or because I wasn’t good enough. I’ve been rejected for less. I don’t want that to be added to the list of reasons why. To know that they’d stay is important for me. So far, none of them have or have wanted to.”

Matt feels his heart sink while Karen shuffles, unsure of what to say. 

“I know the right guy is out there for you,” she settles on. “And I’m sure when you find him and when you’re ready, you’ll know, and it’ll be great. So great, you won’t be able to walk right.”

You let out a soft sigh; with your dating history, you’re not entirely convinced that her words are true, but you appreciate her sentiment. “A girl can only hope, right?”

He’s so caught up in what he just heard, Matt barely registers your footsteps moving towards his office. A gentle knock on his door brings him into the present and away from his thoughts. 

“I’ve got those files for you,” you say. “I can put it in the case folder if you want and you can get to them when you’re ready.”

Matt clears his throat and straightens. “I can take them,” he says with a little tilt of his head and a smile. “Thanks.”

“No problem, Matt,” you say, placing them in his open hand before you walk back to your desk. 

After overhearing your conversation, Matt can’t prevent his mind from wandering. He’s thought about maybe asking you out before, but he’s been worried that with everything he is, everything he does, he’d ruin your friendship. But now that he had overheard this conversation? Not only does he wonder what it’d be like to kiss you, but now to feel your body under his, completely at his mercy as he is the first person to explore you in the most intimate of ways, his hands being the only thing to give you support as he ruts into you, feeling you clench him tightly. Having you sit in his lap, bouncing up and down, rocking back and forth, your face buried in his neck as you moan and whine just for him. Bending you over his desk, leaning over you to kiss down your spine, marking up your flesh . . .

“Are you even paying attention to a word in saying?” Foggy says. Matt couldn’t tell God Himself the point at which his best friend and partner entered his office he’s so lost in thought. 

“Sorry, no,” Matt says sheepishly. 

“Who is it this time? That short lawyer with the curly hair heading the new GLK/H office in SoHo?”

He chuckles nervously and shakes his head. “No, not her.”

“Well, I expect the full details when you’re a little less horny.”

“Sure, Fog,” he appeases. “What’s up?”

“I have some things for the discovery on the Christiansen case. Turns out the McNeils were a little less honest than they lead us to believe . . .”

“Thanks for staying late,” Matt says, casually leaning against his office door frame, his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows, tie long gone somewhere in his office with a few buttons undone. 

“No problem, Matt,” you smile, adjusting at your desk to turn and smile at him. “It’s what I’m here for.”

“You always do more than you’re ‘here for’, (Y/N).” He pauses and licks his lips. “You know how much I appreciate you, right? Everything that you do, both for your job here and what you do outside of work.”

“Thanks, Matty,” you say softly, his words making a warm feeling spread across your skin.

He leans away from the doorframe, slowly walking toward where you sit, his hands in his pockets. “You want to get out of here? We could grab a bite, if you want.” His fingers graze over his watch. “It’s late, and I can’t go starving my favorite employee.”

You laugh, the pads of your chair gliding across the floor as you stand up and move toward him. “Don’t let Foggy hear you say that.”

“Eh, he doesn’t count. We’re partners. You’ve stepped up in an incredibly huge way since Karen started at the Bulletin full-time. Nelson and Murdock would’ve sunk without you.”

A blush burns at your cheeks as you dip your head. “You’re giving me too much credit, Matt. It’s all you and Foggy.”

Matt lifts your chin with his finger, gently urging you to look at his face, to stare at his eyes behind his the red lenses of his glasses. 

“You’re too good for everyone, you know that? Pure,” he says softly, his voice hitting a low register. “If people can’t recognize that, they don’t deserve you.”

You’re afraid that your words will catch in your throat while your heart races. “Are you saying that you deserve me?” you whisper. 

“I’d love to think I do, but, you’re far too good for me. But I’d like to stick around—find that answer out for sure.” He takes a half step closer, feeling your body heat pour onto his frame. “Tell me to stop,” Matt breathes, his voice hitting a sinful timbre as his hot breath tickles your skin. “Just tell me to stop, and I will.”

“Matthew, I . . .” you whisper, your lashes fluttering as you try to keep your thoughts straight.

You shouldn’t. He’s your boss. 

He’s your friend. 

But you want him. 

And he wants you. First and foremost, he wants you for who you are and how you make him feel.

You’ve never felt this before. You’ve never had your heart race so fast and your brain short circuit like this. 

“Words, angel.”

Those two words make you lose all self control as you crash your lips to Matt’s, your arms flinging around his neck, your fingers running through his hair and tugging at the strands. Matt moans against your lips, pulling you impossibly close as he leans forward to meet your kisses. Your bodies spin around, pinning you between him and the wall as you exchange passionate embraces. The metal of Matt’s glasses creak between the force of your kisses. Matt’s tongue deftly slides into your mouth, needing to taste every inch of you. Your noses smush together as Matt tightens his grip on your waist, keeping your body in place as he pushes against you. This feeling of his hips against yours is enough to send goosebumps all over your body, parting your lips in a moan that allow him to capture your bottom lip between his, his teeth tugging at the flesh. You’re both breathing heavily as you stand in the office.

“I can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted to do that,” Matt admits, tucking some hair being your ear. His hand gently slides down to your neck, holding onto you softly before leaning forward to kiss you again. His tongue parts your lips once more, making the kiss a little sloppy and wet. His lips are as soft and plush as a new pillow, easily clouding your thoughts and judgement.

“Matt, wait,” you stop him, your hands on his chest to create some distance between the two of you, your chest suddenly feeling too small for your beating heart.

Oh no, he thinks. I fucked up, and I fucked up bad.

“(Y/N), listen, I’m sorry, I—,” he starts, but you halt him with some soft taps to his chest.

“No, Matt. It’s just . . . Well, I’ve never . . . I haven’t . . .” You dip your head, embarrassed at the moment, just like you have felt every time you’ve gotten to this point before. Unlike the other times, however, there is so much more weighing on this for you—this is Matt. “I don’t want to just be a fling for you, Matt. I can’t be a fling. I . . . I care about you too much.”

Matt hears your heart race faster, your entire being on the verge of becoming a complete and utter mess. You’re not sure at what point you started to have feelings for Matt, but you know that they’re there and they’re strong—the fact that he even reciprocates them in the slightest is exciting and terrifying. But at the same time, you know that Matt has quite a reputation, and you don’t want to be just another name on a long list of ladies.

Matt moves one of your hands directly above his heart, holding your other firmly in his. “You could never be a fling. You’re so much more to me than any relationship I’ve had before. It’s only you. And I want to show you just how much I mean that.”

Matt’s words wash over you like warm water from your shower head, His heart beats steadily with each word, the posture of your hand on his chest a silent, wonderful reassurance that he means everything he says. You capture his lips with yours, the embrace languid and tender but absolutely brimming with burning desire. He smiles down at you after your lips part, his nose brushing against yours. “Then I guess the question is if you can keep your hands to yourself long enough for us to make it back to my place.”

The door to his loft isn’t even closed before you bring your lips back to his, pulling him by his shirt collar and into your body, snaking you hands over his shoulders and onto the back of his neck when you feel you have him close enough. Matt’s hands slide down your body and under your thighs, lifting them up around his waist. You moan in delight into his mouth, his lips moving to your neck to nip, suck, and lick at the think skin that you are all too eagerly offering him. He tosses his glasses on the table by the door as he walks your bodies from the entryway to the bedroom. Matt’s attempt to gently place you down on the mattress is skewed by his own growing desire, turning the motion into more of a toss, your body bouncing up and down on the furniture.

Matt kneels at the edge of the bed, volleying kisses back and forth on the inside of your legs. Pushing up the fabric of your flowing skirt, he gains access to your thighs, becoming a little more aggressive with his ministrations, nibbling at the skin, licking down the little stings that accompany it. You let out breathy little sighs, each press of Matt’s lips against your skin making your heart race in a glorious fashion. Each kiss moves higher up your leg, spreading new branches of goosebumps and warmth all over.

That when you feel it—an overpowering wetness between you legs, trapped in your panties. 

“Matt,” you breathe. Internally panicking that you’ve started your period far before you were supposed to, you wanted to push Matt away to save your embarrassment. But Matt knows exactly what really happened—it’s a sign of your enjoyment, your eagerness for him, your want. You really are so pure. Part of him feels guilty for making a move on you like this no matter how readily you accepted him, no matter how you both feel for one another, but the thought of being your first, being the one to tarnish that pristine virtue, to make you his, it makes him rock hard. 

His hands snake up your thighs and push them wide open, letting your scent hit through his nose, permitting through your panties. 

“Matt,” you try again, begging God above or whatever supreme being is there to spare you any further embarrassment. 

“You smell so pretty for me, angel,” he groans, brushing his nose on your clothed core. “Can’t imagine how you taste.”

Matt presses soft kisses to your clothed core, pulling a whine from your lips. 

“Your panties are so soft,” he mutters, nipping at you through the soft, thin fabric some more. “I bet your cunt is even softer.”

Dragging his lips up your panties, he grasps the hem of your underwear with his teeth, slowly pulling it down your hips and off your body. You watch the movement as Matt seductively works, and you’re shocked to find the inside of your panties void of any red color. Instead there is just a large damp spot in the middle and a long string of a clear something coming from you and to the fabric. Once your underwear is midway down your thighs, Matt uses his calloused fingers to slide them off of your body, letting the fabric pool on the floor between his bent legs and the bed. 

“I want you to tell me how it feels,” Matt whispers, his hot breath fanning across your glistening folds as his nose brushes up against the top of your pubic mound, placing a little kiss there in anticipation. “I want to hear those pretty little sounds fall from your lips, okay?”

You don’t even get a proper chance to really comprehend or answer his question. Matt’s lips are on you in a second, pressing a soft, open kiss right on a special bundle of nerves that make you moan and your heart sharply skip a beat.

“You like that, sweetheart?” he smirks, gently grazing his hands over your exposed thighs. “That feel nice, hm?”

“Yes,” you breathe, looking down at him, the sight of his face between your legs sending you absolutely wild. “Do it again.”

A devilish smile grows on his lips before he complies to your request, this time adding light sucks to the way he wraps his plush lips around your clit. You can’t help the needy moans that fall out of your mouth, keening for more attention from his lips. You can feel Matt’s lips pull into a big smile as he continues to work his mouth. He pulls away for half of a second before licking a stripe up your folds. You whine, your back arching off of his mattress while your head tosses to the side. It’s like you’re not in control of your body while Matt’s lips are on you, twisting and turning into the pleasure. Matt has to use his forearm and one of his strong hands to pin your hips down to the mattress as he eats you out like a starved man. The combination of licks, sucks, and kisses turn you into a whimpering and moaning mess. When he lightens the embraces, you think you’re getting off easily. What you don’t expect is for a finger from Matt’s free hand to lightly brush up against your glistening folds. You suck in a hiss at the sensation, causing Matt to glance back up toward you while his finger continues to move up and down. 

The sight is something glorious. His fluffy brown hair is disheveled and the tip of his nose, lips, and chin are covered in a marvelous slick from having his face buried between your legs. His honey hazel eyes are warm as they focus just to the right of you, making you feel safe as you cross a boundary you can never come back from.

“If you enjoyed that, angel, I think you’ll like what comes next,” Matt teases, his voice low with lust.

Dragging his fingers back down, you feel him at your opening. His fingers, absolutely covered in your arousal, gently push your lips open as he feels you; then, he carefully prods your entrance with his middle finger, pushing in slowly. Your eyes flutter shut and you moan as you feel him, slowly moving his finger in and out of you.

“Tell me how that feels, angel,” he urges, unable to stop himself from pressing a gentle kiss to your hipbone.

“G-good,” you exhale, closing your eyes to focus on the way that he manages to sneak his finger a little bit deeper in you each time.

“And do you like this better?” Matt punctuates his question with a curl of his finger, the tip of his digit scraping against your wrinkly walls and hitting something soft and spongey that draws an intense moan from you. A deep chuckle rolls from Matt’s lips and coats your warm body like honey. “Is that a yes, sweetheart? I need you to try and use your words for me.”

“Better,” you whine, writhing against his arm. “More.”

“More.” The way he coos my words back to you is somewhere between a question and amusement. Regardless of his exact tone, Matt carefully slides another finger in you. Rolling your head from one side to another, you let out a low groan, basking in how amazing the sensation feels as Matt manages to hit something so spongey and wonderful, increasing the pleasure with each ministration. You can’t but help the way that your toes curl and your back arches when he puts his mouth back on you. Your hand shoots towards his head, fingers tugging at his hair to keep him close. You’re an absolute mess as Matt works you, and you have no idea how or what to focus on more—his fingers or his mouth. What does begin to register, however, is a tightness in your tummy, a fluttering. You’re not exactly sure what’s going on, but you know that the longer that Matt works, the way that his touches set your body on fire, the more prominent the feeling gets.

You wine as he removes his fingers from you, his mouth kissing everywhere but where he had been thoroughly inspecting the real estate. Pushing your dress up and off your body, Matt wastes no time kissing as much of your gradually exposed skin as possible. Once the fabric is pushed over your head and off of your arms, Matt peppers kisses all over your collarbone and neck as he pulls your bra down and off, just avoiding your lips as he changes locations.

“You’re going so good, sweetheart,” he praises, his hands finding a home on your waist as he finally brings his lips to yours. “But that feeling you had? That good one in your tummy? I want to be in you when it finally lets go. Will you let me do that, angel?”

Matt barely has a chance to finish his sentence before you blurt “yes” and bring his mouth back on yours. The kiss is deep and needy, and he lets you undo his shirt and feel all over his sculpted figure. You don’t know what takes over you, but all you know is that you need Matt in every way, shape, and form possible. Matt finishes the work you started, wriggling off his white button down as he paints kisses all over your chest. His senses are in overdrive as he comes in contact with the supple skin of your breasts, his nose filling with a cocktail of your fruity body wash, your skin, and the thin sheen of sweat that has emerged on your body. While the noises you make as you move against his sheets is a beautiful symphony, the way your heart sings for him is the best thing he has heard in his entire life. Its rhythm is one of elation and tenderness—pure.

There’s that word again.

Even as you lay under Matt, completely at his mercy as the two of you engage in an activity that should pollute the very core of the term, but still manage to embody the fullest extent of the word.

As the thought crosses his mind as he brushes the tip of his nose up your skin to rejoin your lips, that’s when the thought comes to him.

You’re it for him.

“I thought I was the one who’s supposed to get flustered,” you chuckle breathily, your hand moving to caress his cheek. 

A smile pulls at Matt’s lips, bringing those beautiful crinkles out for your enjoyment. “I just want to remember this,” he explains softly before pulling you in for a lusty kiss, a moan falling from his lips into you. Matt gives your swollen and tingly skin a few more tender kisses before leaning back on his knees, undoing his belt and ridding himself of all fabric below the waist.

You suck in a gasp when you see his cock out, hard, painfully taut, and leaking. All for you. Matt shifts his weight to his left, twisting his body to reach for the nightstand. You take his hand in both of yours, preventing him from going anywhere.

“Angel, I—,” he starts, but you give his hand a squeeze.

“Matt, I want this,” you keen as you try to calm your excited breathing. Everything feels right. “I want you.” You pull him back into you, and he lowers himself over your body so his hair tuft flops in front. 

“Are you sure?” God above, is his voice so soft when he says that question. It’s brimmed with excitement, affection, tenderness, and nerves. 

“I’m sure,” you confirm as his thumb gently strokes back and forth on your cheek. The pad of his digit roams to your bottom lip, letting him feel just how soft it is. You open your mouth slightly, and Matt can’t help but slide his finger in, letting you capture it and envelope it in warmth. Now, it’s Matt’s turn to moan as he feels your tongue swirl around his finger, letting his mind wander to what your mouth would be link around his cock.

That question will have to be answered another time.

Right now, he wants nothing more than to be buried as far as he can possibly get in you.

Pulling out his finger, he presses one more kiss to your lips before adjusting himself between your spread legs. You've gotten even wetter for him, if that's at all possible, and the smell of it drives him up a wall.

"I'm gonna go slow, okay?" he tells you. "I want to hear those beautiful nosies from you, angel, but you need to stop me if it hurts and you need some time. Can I hear you promise me that?"

"Promise," you whisper, your heart racing in an out of control pace. Matt takes one of your hands in his, lacing his fingers with yours in an effort to soothe you.

"Good girl," he coos. You feel a deep blush burn at your cheeks and your heart race as you squeeze his hand involuntarily. "You like that, huh? You like when I call you my good girl?" Just like earlier in the night, your brain short circuits when the name falls from his lips once more. "Oh, I think l'm gonna have fun with that," he teases, bringing your entwined hands to his lips for a kiss.

Carefully, Matt moves forward, and you can feel the head of his cock press against your opening. He pauses for a beat before he continues to press forward, making you a whimpering mess with each movement. With each gentle push into you, your pleasure grows.

"Wait," you squeak when the burning stretch becomes too much. "Hold on a second."

"That's my good girl," he praises. "Doing what I asked, using your words. Tell me when you're ready for more, angel."

As you take your time to adjust, Matt brings your wrist and forearm up to his lips, kissing, sucking, and nipping at the skin, licking down each mark he makes in an effort to soothe the sting.

"More," you swallow.

"Kisses, angel?" he smiles against your skin. "Or cock?"

"Cock," you breathe. "I want more."

Planting a kiss smack dab in the middle of your palm, Matt continues moving his hips forward slowly, letting out a low grunt as he pushes deeper in you.

"Oh, God, Matt," you moan, the sting of intrusion having turned into something only of pleasure. "Oh, so good.”

"So perfect, sweetheart," he sighs as his face controls in pleasure that matches your own. A low rumble falls from his chest when he bottoms out in you, somehow managing to fit all the way inside.

"Talk to me," he hums as he leans back over your body, kissing up the curve of your side and up and over your breasts, up the column of your neck, and finally to your lips.

"Move," you beg, tugging his bottom lip with your teeth before you press kisses up his jaw and to his ear. If that's what him pushing in felt like, you want it all. Over and over and over. "I-I need you to move."

A blissed-out smirk falls across Matt's lips before he kisses you hungrily, one hand resting on the side of your neck while the other weaves through your hair in the back of your head.

"You're doing such a good job taking my cock like that," he praises as he slowly beings to set a rhythm, the drag of his length against you unlike anything you have felt before. "Such a good girl for me, letting me spread you wide and take you. God, angel, you’re doing so good, taking me all the way like that, nice and deep.”

How Matt is forming coherent sentences is fully beyond you at this point. Maybe it’s because he’s done this before, maybe it solely something he’s doing to keep you calm as he pushes through his own pleasure. 

“So tight, angel,” he grunts, his hands sliding up your thighs towards your hips. “Oh, you feel so good. Fuck.”

You moan and whimper with each one of Matt’s thrusts, and you yank him down on top of you, desperate to feel every last inch of him against you. He groans but quickly lets out a little chuckle, thrown off and endeared by your excitement as he cages your body below his. 

“You like that, sweetheart? Feel good?”

“Y-Yes,” you moan, moving your hands along his incredibly soft skin. You paint a trail of kisses all along his shoulders, collarbones, and neck while he keeps on rocking into you. His hot breath tickles your skin as his beard brushes goosebumps all over your body while he tries to match you embraces. Matt whispers and grunts little praises into your skin, never faltering to let you know how good you’re doing for him. 

“M-Matt,” you whine, your nails digging little crescents into his back. “S-Shit! Mmm!”

“Words,” he grunts, his ability for full sentences now starting to escape him. 

“God, you’re so deep!” you cry, your eyes fluttered shut as you absorb the pleasure he gives you as your words being to slur together. “So big.”

Matt tunes into your body, listening to how the blood rushes through your veins down to where your bodies join together and your heart races. He knows you’re not going to last much longer. 

“Angel,” he pants. “Angel, it’s okay.”

“Matt!” you cry, your voice curving up in pitch. You’re so close, he can taste it—and it drives him wild. 

“I know, angel, I know. You’re gonna feel so g—fuck, that’s nice. So good for me.”

“Matt, I—.”

“‘M right here,” he assures with a kiss. “Right here. Let go for me, angel. Let me hear you.”

With a few more thrusts, an intense pleasure rips through your body, unlike anything you have felt before, and far better than what you’ve ever experienced. Your hips buck up to meet Matt’s while your legs latch onto his waist. Matt up above you is the only thing keeping you from thrashing around in euphoria. You hold onto him for dear life, your hands mussing his hair as he buries his face in your neck, moaning as he chases his own release and spills into you. He forces his hips to keep moving fast as he cums, desperate to make sure that your first orgasm is memorable, that the tremors ripple through your body long after it has past, even if it means the sensations verge on too much for him. Only once he feels you start to loosen up and your breathing begin to relax does he pull out, pressing kisses into your skin all the while his hands caress your shaking body. He hears your head roll to the side to face him as he lies down next to you. 

“Matt,” you breathe, and he can hear the blissed out smile spreading across your face as you curl your body into his.

“You alright, angel?” he whispers, kissing your forehead. 

“Amazing,” you sigh softly. 

“I’m gonna go get some things to clean you up, okay? I’ll be right back.”

You hum a confirmation as Matt gives you another kiss, carefully rolling out of bed and through the loft. He returns quickly with a warm damp towel, some water, and a pack of grapes. Putting the glasses down on the nightstand, he sits on his knees, pressing gentle kisses into the skin of your stomach, hips, and thighs. 

“Can you open your legs for me, sweetheart?” he asks softly. 

“I don’t think I can do more,” you breathe dreamily.

Matt chuckles, absolutely beaming at your happy disposition in his bed. “We’ll get you there eventually, sweetheart. But I want to clean you up. I’m gonna move your knee, okay?”

You oblige with his request, a soft moan falling from your lips as you spread wide for him, the delightful soreness reminding you of how perfectly his body fit with yours. “That’s it,” he whispers as he helps gently guide your leg open. “That’s my girl.” Matt is careful with his wipes, sprinkling kisses here and there as little reassurances. He’s extra careful when he gets to your core, knowing all too well how sensitive you must be. When he’s finished, he tosses it to the side and leans up over you to kiss you. 

“Can you sit up for me now and drink some water?” he whispers into your cheek before stamping another kiss to your skin. 

You do as he asks without another word and he hands you the glass, a gentle arm around your shoulders as you hydrate. “Can I get you anything else, angel? Do you want a snack? I can give you a little massage, if you want.”

“I’m okay,” you tell him, your mind beginning to reorient itself as you snuggle into his body. “That was . . . I don’t even know.”

“I hope it was a good ‘I don’t even know’,” he smirks. 

“The best ‘I don’t even know’,” you chuckle. “I, um . . .” You blush deeply before you mutter, “Thank you for being my first.”

Matt notices the skip in your heartbeat, the shy and scared tone of your voice, and the salty tears that threaten to spill down your cheeks.

You’re embarrassed—ashamed, even. Why?

Matt pushes your chin up with his thumb and forefinger, forcing you to look at his face. 

“Thank you for giving me the honor. For trusting me,” he whispers, placing a light kiss on the apple of your cheek. “This is something important. Personal.”

“You don’t think . . . I mean, I . . .” you start, unsure of how to even form the question you were thinking.

“Not too many people are like you, (Y/N)—pure like you in everything that you do. I’m glad you were able to trust me with this.” Your wrap an arm around him and turn your face into his shoulder. “I wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else tonight with anyone else.” He kisses your temple. “Let me take you to dinner tomorrow,” he whispers in your hair. “Let me date you. Because I don’t want this to be it between us.”

That sentence makes you tilt your head up, amazed how he’s facing you with nothing but utter adoration. “I told you you weren’t a fling. I want the chance to show you how happy you make me, how you make me feel. Please?”

A bright smile pulls at your lips, a new wave of energy washing over you. You pull your body up, having your lips meet his, rolling on top of him. You gingerly straddle his hips with your legs, kissing him passionately as he reciprocates with just as much emotion. 

“Can I take that as a yes, or?” Matt chuckles, a deep red blush speckling his fair complexion as you carefully place your body weight on his lap. 

“Yes,” you hum, pulling his bottom lip between your teeth before moving back in and slipping your tongue in his mouth like he did to you earlier. 

“Mm, angel,” he murmurs against your lips, and you feel something begin to press against your thigh, Matt’s strong hands moving up your waist as his thumbs brush the sides of your breasts. Your heart swells with excitement and your face flushes with heat, a tingly buzz in your lower abdomen. If you thought Matt was intoxicating just by sitting at his desk doing legal work, you are simply drunk on him with his body below you like this. 

“How about we test my stamina?” you sigh between kisses.

Matt smiles brightly and kisses you with urgency, understanding that tonight will probably go longer than he initially anticipated. Even in your desire to do something so sinful, you still remain so pure.

And you’re all his.

Permanent Taglist: @majesticavenger​ @steampowerednightvaler​ @themusingsofmany @just-the-hiddles​ @toozmanykids​ @dangertoozmanykids101 @clints-worldavengers @theburningbookshop @itwasthereaminuteago @peter1ismybrother @hellskitchens-whore @dpaccione

#matt murdock #Matt Murdock x reader #Matt Murdock fanfic #Matt Murdock fanfiction #Matt Murdock x fem!reader #Matt Murdock x virgin!reader #Matt Murdock x virgin!fem!reader #Matt Murdock fluff #Matt Murdock smut #Matt Murdock x reader fluff #Matt Murdock x reader smut #Matt Murdock x fem!reader fluff #Matt Murdock x fem!reader smut #daredevil #daredevil x reader #daredevil fanfic #daredevil fanfiction #daredevil smut #daredevil fluff #daredevil x fem!reader #daredevil x virgin!reader #daredevil x fem!virgin!reader #marvel #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction

[youhideastar]

WujiWatch: CQL Rewatch Episode 2

What stood out to me most about this episode is how absolutely hilarious it is. Two things in particular:

First, Lan Jingyi, turning to Wei Wuxian during the fight against the dancing statue and shouting, “Why are you playing a flute in the middle of a battle? You really are crazy!” as if LAN Jingyi doesn’t come from Gusu LAN Sect, where LAN cultivators whip out musical instruments in battle ALL THE TIME. 🤣

(I also really respect the writing choice to have Lan Jingyi Lansplain Zidian’s powers to Jiang Cheng. They had to have someone deliver that piece of exposition for the audience’s sake, and the writers accurately identified the character in that scene who would have the chutzpah to lecture Jiang Cheng about his own weapon.)

And second, the amazing scene where Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng sit in total silence in that pavilion, emanating hatred at each other without making eye contact. This scene is hysterical even on the first watch. But it gets exponentially funnier when you realize that both are strong enough cultivators to practice inedia—so, necessarily, one of them sat down to have some lunch and the other one decided to park himself at the same damn restaurant even though he does not need to eat, purely for the express purpose of being hostile. And by “the other one,” I clearly mean “Jiang Cheng” – no way it was the other way around. They're both incredibly good at spite, but LWJ is not going to intentionally choose to share air with the person he despises most in the world.

#the untamed #wujiwatch #cql #meta

[fanficwriter101]

CHEATED

Pairing: Solo Sikoa x Reader x Jimmy

Warning: None, some slight smut in the next chapter

Tonight’s episode of Friday night Smackdown is like no other, the reason behind that is the fact that your man Jimmy, is finally getting the spotlight he deserves. Not that he hasn’t been getting any, but he and his twin brother Jey are separated for the first time, so that means they won’t be sharing spotlights no more. You were so excited and happy for him, now he can show his true potential on his own and you’ve never been more proud.

Kicking off the show was none other than Jimmy Uso interrupting the returning John Cena and starting their feud in the process. You watched as the scene unfold between the two male athletes. Jimmy attempted a super kick but fails, and ended up getting an Attitude Adjustment. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t see that coming. Jimmy is now playing as a heel character, and you’re loving every minute of it.

Right beside you stood Solo Sikoa, who is also watching everything unfold. You find it funny that Jimmy just recently left the bloodline, and now he’s trying to weasel his way back in after Jey moved to Raw. So now everybody’s confused, especially Solo.

“just look at him, he is doing so well on his own so far, don’t you think, Joe?” you couldn’t hide your excitement, and it’s honestly kind of embarrassing to you. You felt like you were acting like a teenager in love. Solo didn’t say much, he just observed you with his usual stance. You both weren’t even on camera, so him staying in character makes things funnier for you.

“Oh! Looks like he’s on his way backstage” You did a little dance as you said. Solo merely shook his head. Seeing you act like this has got to be the cutest things he’s ever witnessed. It’s no secret to anyone that Solo likes you, even you know that. But you are dating his older brother so that makes things a little awkward. However, you do cherish him as a friend. You both went through a lot together during your time in the NXT. But when you were moved up to the main roster, you both slowly drifted away, and you ended up getting closer to Jimmy and Jey. Obviously one thing lead to another and here you are, dating Jimmy, for almost a year now.

Your one year anniversary is coming up very soon, you were hoping Jimmy remembers so you guys could do something to celebrate. Just the thought of it makes your heart want to explode.

You were completely lost in thoughts, you failed to realize Solo calling out your name. “Huh?” you snapped out of it and veered your focus on Solo, who is raising an eyebrow at you. “Sorry, I was distracted” You say, until a voice behind you scared you. “Yeah you was” You turned around to find Jimmy smiling down at you and quickly embraced him. “Jon!” “Aye, baby. Did you see me out there?” you pulled away from Jimmy and nodded. “Yes, you kinda got rearranged out there” You joked. Jimmy gave you a funny look, “Rearranged? You sure you was watching? I ain’t got rearranged” He clicked his tongue before smiling. You giggled in response just as Jimmy shifts his focus in his brother. “Aye man” He extended his arm for Solo to shake his hand, but Solo just stood there with that same cold expression and arms crossed.

Jimmy played it off and awkwardly gave himself the handshake. “Aiight aiight. We cool” You merely shook your head at him for being such a goof sometimes. “Anyway, I gotta head back to my locker room and shower real quick and then we can get out of here” He smiled. You nodded in response. “And I’ll be right here, waiting” you grinned. “You aight?” He questioned, clearly a little worried about your energy level. “Couldn’t be better” You let out another toothy grin, this time Jimmy just gives you a funny look and walks away. “I'll be right back”

Solo stood there watching you act like a complete fool of yourself before shaking his head. You noticed this as soon as you turned to face him. “What?” “You acting childish, that’s what”. You ignored his little insults and shrugged your shoulders. “Why are you so happy?” You looked at Solo quizzically as you waited for him to elaborate. “I mean you’re more happier than you normally are”. He explained. “Oh, Jimmy and I have an anniversary coming up soon, I’m just imagining all the exciting things we could do to celebrate”.

“(Name)!” you recognize that voice and immediately turned around to find Adam waving his hand, gesturing for you to come over.

“Oh crap!” You turned to look at Solo. “I forgot I made plans to talk to Adam before I leave. If Jimmy gets out of the shower before I get back here, could you just fill him in? Thank you” You didn’t even bother to wait for him to agree, you just left.

Solo has a match up next, so he’s going to see Jimmy regardless. He made his way towards the locker room where he accidentally stumbled upon Jimmy talking on his phone while leaned up against the wall. He couldn’t care less about what Jimmy is doing, he had his own thing going on right now. But what Jimmy said next really caught his attention.

“Damn girl, I miss that sexy voice of yours”

Solo didn’t need much to figure out what was going on. He quickly stepped away from the locker room and looked back at the spot where you were standing at earlier. He honestly couldn’t believe what he just overheard and the fact that it had to be him to catch his own brother on the act. All kinds of thoughts began spiraling around his mind. From the time he met you, to the time you started dating Jimmy, to the most recent one where you just told him your anniversary with Jimmy was coming up soon. And to find out Jimmy has been cheating this whole time really pissed him off.

He was so lost in thoughts he didn’t even noticed you standing right next to him calling his name. “Joe?”

When he eventually snapped out of it, he looked at you, and then he looked behind him where he thought Jimmy would be at this point. He didn’t know how long he had been standing there losing his damn mind for, but it definitely should’ve gotten him caught by Jimmy. Fortunately for him, that wasn’t the case. Jimmy was still in the locker room clueless about the fact that he knows.

“Joe?” You called again, this time tapping his shoulder lightly. He looked back at you and the two of you made eye contact. “Are you all right? You look stressed out” You said concerned. Solo didn’t say anything, he couldn’t say anything. He didn’t know how to tell you without making things awkward. But, he knows he has to let you know. You deserve it.

Unfortunately Solo couldn’t do much of anything now that Jimmy had appeared from behind. “Aye, what are you guys doing? You guys good?” you nodded your head before looking at Solo. “Joe?” Solo didn’t say anything, instead, he turned his whole body around to face Jimmy and stared him down. Jimmy was clearly confused. “You good man?”

Again, no response. Solo just walked right past Jimmy and entered the locker room. You and Jimmy looking at each other confused as hell. “The hell?? Did you see that?” Jimmy asked you. You nodded. Suddenly the announcement was made, loud enough for you and Jimmy to hear. Solo’s match was up next and you both figured it might just be him staying in character.

“Ah, he good, he just getting ready for his match” Jimmy stated. You hoped that was the case, but that was still strange, even for Solo.

————————————————————————

2 hours later, you and Jimmy were going out for dinner. You were slightly dressed up for the occasion, while Jimmy wasn’t. Which was typical of him, but still. He was also on his phone a lot too, which obviously made things worse.

“Jon”

“What up?” He never looked away from his phone as he answered. “Uhm, I was thinking, since our anniversary is coming up-Maybe we could do something special together”. You suggested. The man didn’t respond. Whatever he was doing on his phone really has his attention.

“Or I could continue talking to myself..that’s cool too”. Placing an elbow on the table, you rested the right side of your face on the palm of your hand and sighed.

“How are your meals?”. You hear the waitress questioned. You nodded your head in response. “It’s good, thank you”. Now shifting her focus towards Jimmy, the waitress asked him the same question. “Jon, Jon!”. You cried out in a whispered tone. “What up?”. “She asked you how your food is”. “Oh, it’s tight” He gave the waitress a flirty smile. “Who y’all got working in the kitchen? They be killing it!”

The waitress let out a soft giggle. “I’m glad you’re enjoying your meals. I’ll be back to check up on you guys later”. As she walks off, you observed Jimmy, noticing his eyes on the waitress’s ass.

“Jon..”

“What’s up, baby?” He questioned as he began digging into his food. You thought about asking that same question to him again, but then you decided against it. You had another question in mind instead. “Do you remember what’s going on in 2 weeks?”

Jimmy looked up at you, giving you that questionable look. “No..?”. You just nodded your head as you looked down. “No wait! It’s your birthday!”. You shook your head in response.

“Good guess, but no”

Jimmy fumbled around a little bit before giving into his phone again. “Oh damn, I gotta take this. I’ll be right back, baby”.

You watched him get up from his seat and walked away. “Sure…” Once you were left alone, you decided to stare out the window, until you felt your phone vibrated from your bag. Confused, you looked inside to check your phone only to find a text message from Solo.

I really need to talk to you

Next Chapter

#wwe #solo sikoa #jimmy uso #cheated #solo sikoa x reader #the bloodline

[babiebom]

HATE THE TIME LORDS WTF

I’m watching the end of time (SPOILERS)

THEY SEEM LIKE SUCH ASSHOLES

Like knowing what we know about the timeless child and everything they’re the WORST

Like sorry to the tenth doctor I would’ve actually shot the time lord president without hesitation the second he said “you are diseased…be it a disease of our own creation” to the master

Like yeah I know he doesn’t kill the master but the whole pointing the gun at him I’m like ABSOLUTELY NOT

Like they actually made me feel bad for him…for BOTH of them. Like what do the time lord council do other than BE ASSHOLES? Given I haven’t seen original who idk what they do there but I DISLIKE THEM SO MUCH actually all they do is use people

I know he’s killed people and been an absolute menace and a monster but like :( they did this to him

Also I think it would’ve been really funny if everyone had his face but their normal bodies. So it’s the masters face and like tiddies if he was a woman or something. Like it’s literally just his face in their bodies instead of turning into him completely. Idk why it would be funnier to me.

Also him giving his life to save wilf makes me CRY like I’ve never seen the specials before bc I could never find where to watch them. Also this whole tantrum he’s throwing is throwing me off like BROTHER he honestly just saved someone and you’re throwing this tantrum IN FRONT OF HIM my feelings would be hurt but at the same time I understand because I too would throw a tantrum if I had to die

But maybe it’s bc I don’t really like hurting peoples feelings that I just would be like DAMN guess I’m gone then bc I wouldn’t like to hurt Wilfs feelings like when he says “you’re unimportant” like I KNOW he is just upset but PLEASE MY FEELINGS SIR.

Also THIS IS HOW IM FINDING OUT THIS IS HOW HE REGENERATES INTO ELEVEN???????????the website I watch these on DOESNT have any of the specials so I’ve had to go searching for them and WOWOWOWOWW

also I hate Martha and Mickey together I preferred her with the Milligan man. Like yes they’re cute together but I would’ve like her to stay with dude MISSGIRLPAYATTENTION nvm

He’s saving people?but in a sad way?

He’s staring at Jack??? Oh he’s hooking him up with someone OH ALONSY ALONSO OH

oh it’s miss nurse from the family of blood. I hate those episodes. WaS sHe hApPy iN tHe EnD? FUCK OFF

CUTE I DIDNT KNOW WE GOT TO SEE DONNA GET MARRIED OMFG

who is Heffery? Is that Donna’s dad? Bc if it is THATS SO CUTE BUT SAD?????THEY HADA WEDDING IN A GRAVEYARD?

oh it’s a church with a graveyard

Kinda poetic but OOF ghosties scare me also SAD BYEBYE FOCTOR

oh god it’s rose again

BUT ITS THE ORIGINAL ROSE I LOVE HER

THIS IS WHERE THE ICONIC GIF COMES FROM??????????

I FORGOT IT WAS 2005 IM LITERALLY 4 WHEN ALL THATS HAPPENING? (The first series I mean)

like it’s weird to think about where you would be in time in the universe during doctor who

Like I would literally be a child in Texas who probably missed EVERYTHING because who would destroy TEXAS? California I get but unless they realize how big Texas is they’d go for like Washington or something

AN OOD?

their faces are icky but they’re also cute? I love them except for when they’re evil <3

I also always read the Police public call Box as “police the box” and idky my brain is like NAUR the LETTERS ARE TOO CLOSE TOGETHER AND SMALLER IT MUST SAY THE???????

Goodbye ten I can’t believe that this is the first time I’m seeing him regenerate. I literally went through the entirety of nuwho and haven’t seen the Specials omfg. OH NAUR HE DOESNT WANNA GO PLS.

Omfg you destroy the tardis every time so rude HELLO ELEVEN MY LOVE HIS VOICE IS SO SQUEAKY I LOVE HIM

#doctor who #tenth doctor #eleventh doctor #dr who #dw #dw shitpost #dw spoilers #dw specials #series 4 #doctor who shitpost #doctor who spoilers #doctor who special #dr who spoilers #dr who special #Dr who shitpost #the master #the master doctor who #simm!master

[cl0wncandies]

breast cancer show ever is my favorite south park episode. i think that the whole plot line that sets up the fight scene in last few minutes of the episode makes it even more satisfying to watch cartman get the snot beaten out of him in the end.

cause first off, before this episode aired, there wasn’t really any point in the show where cartman truly got what he deserved. yeah some bad things had happened to him before, but he’s never truly gotten any form of karma for his actions.

so when wendy says that she’s gonna fight him. he doesn’t take it all that seriously, just he expects to either easily win the fight or for wendy to back out before the end of the school day.

and then at lunch he realizes that if he loses the fight, everyone will think he’s a massive loser. what makes this even funnier is that cartman genuinely believes that he’s “the cool kid” and that everyone likes him. so his fear of losing a fight to a girl (which is a big deal for fourth graders) makes him desperate to prevent it from happening, without apologizing in front of everyone of course.

so now cartman does literally everything in his power to stop the fight before the school day ends.

he tries to apologize to wendy in private, without confessing that he was wrong in front of everyone.

he tries bribing her with money, and even goes as far as to eat his own underwear.

and near the end of the school day, he’s so desperate to get out of the fight that he goes up to his teachers desk and takes a dump on it in front of the whole class so he would get a detention. and then the fight was moved to the next morning. he wasn’t out of the fight yet he had time to find another strategy to stop wendy from beating the shit out of him.

cartman then goes full tattletale mode and tells his mom a sob story of how wendy is bullying him at school, and how we just wants to be her friend. he even takes the extra mile to put a fancy cardigan on and comb his hair over to make himself look even more sad and pathetic.

so obviously wendys parents are like “hey don’t fight this kid” and she finally gives up.

now, if cartman had just stopped there, he probably would’ve gotten away with his actions like he normally has up to this point in the show. but this is eric cartman, so he obviously has to take the extra mile in terrorizing her at school. he makes his school research paper about making fun of breast cancer, just to further show to wendy that there’s nothing she can do anymore since her parents have prevented her from fighting.

then wendy gets called down to the principals office, and principal victoria is like “hey are you gonna beat up cartman” and wendy says no. then victoria is like “mmmm, are you sure about that?”

AND THEN SHE BASICALLY GIVES WENDY PERMISSION TO FUCKING DESTROY CARTMAN IN THE SCHOOL PLAYGROUND. she calls him a “fat little lump of cancer” that needs to be “fought.” i find this scene so funny cause it just shows that literally everyone, including the adults and school faculty wants to see cartman get some form of karma.

and then the actual fight scene itself is one of the best moments in the entire show. here’s a list of things that i love about it.

wendy pulls up to the playground with a bunch of students following her. some of the kids are from different grade levels, which shows that literally everyone wants to see cartman get beaten up.

and wendy also puts her hair up in a bun and takes off her coat so we can see her my little pony tank top, so you know that she means BUSINESS.

the face that cartman makes when he realizes that he can no longer manipulate or gaslight his way out of the fight without backing out in front of the entire school, which he can’t do since he believes that he’s the “cool kid.”

cartman having to pull up his pants after the first punch that wendy threw made him fall over.

and lastly, how butters gets so excited to see them fight. he’s been egging them both on throughout the entire episode, and he gets so happy when wendy finally shows up at the playground.

also, when he yells “FUCK HIM UP WENDY!” was so funny

anyways 10/10 episode it’s so funny

#south park #south park fandom #eric cartman #sp cartman #wendy testaburger #sp wendy #butters stotch #sp butters #principal victoria #stan marsh #kyle brovlofski #kenny mccormick

[theprinceandthewitch]

Okay but, even though I dislike TTT for making the characters sit on their asses for months for no reason [like seriously, Im not sure why they're wasting time building a door without titan blood. Luz and Hunter both know a door will not work without titan blood.] It's the most entertaining episode of the season for me. When I first watched this episode I wasn't bored like i was with the other two episodes.

It's not just because of the Lunter bonding and Lunter hints - it's that they wrote the episode in such a way where it looks like Hunter is homewrecking Luz's and Amity's relationship. If you were to insert yourself into Amity's POV it looks like Hunter has a thing for Luz. And that is soooo funny to me.

like seriously,

Luz and Amity have been clinging to each other since they came to the human realm. The only time she isnt with Luz is when Luz is at school and this specific day TTT takes place on. This is one of the rare moments Amity isn't with Luz and she's going to be busy for many hours trying to figure out the mystery behind the rebus.

Amity inspires the others to venture into the human realm with her so they can figure out the mystery behind the rebus. Everyone is ready to go into town but Hunter needs to change his outfit because Amity thinks its cringe. So Hunter is like, okay, ill change and catch the next bus into town.

And then he never shows up

So it's like, hmmm, I wonder where Hunter could be on a day Amity isn't clinging to Luz and is going to be in town for many hours...

AND THEN - the next time anyone else sees him, he comes through the door with Luz lying about where they've been and what they've been doing. It's an obvious lie but no one questions it.

At the faire Amity tells everyone - including Hunter - that she wants to surprise Luz with the rebus after the carriage ride. However, after the "Wittebane Backstory" carriage ride is over Hunter and Luz completely disappear. Amity literally takes her eyes off of them for a moment and they vanish.

Then Gus says THIS as a response to Amity's worry: "Calm down. They probably just went to buy some more cars."

His dialogue here never fails to make me laugh because it sounds like Gus is covering for his bro 😭 and it's even funnier when you realize Gus just retold Hunters lie lksjdsldf

Anyways, right after Gus tells her to calm down, Amity notices the rebus is missing... She knows Luz wouldnt take it because she literally does not know it exists. HUNTER knows about the rebus though - AND he knows Amity wanted to surprise Luz with it. So its like... Why would he take it when he knows she wanted to surprise her girlfriend with it? He must have put two and two together during the carriage ride and knew the rebus was actually going to lead to titan blood [they were unsure if it was going to lead to titan blood initially].

But... that doesn't explain why he would take it... everyone was going to go get the titan blood together right after the ride. Perhaps... Hunter wanted to impress Luz by taking all the credit for uncovering the mystery behind the rebus even though he never showed up when they were looking for information about the rebus in town... That's so strange... why would he do that?

...You dont think he has a thing for Luz do you?

Let me remind you that no one else besides Luz and Hunter think Belos is still alive. Hunter didnt want anyone else to know because he doesnt want to scare them. So Hunter and Luz just VANISHING into thin air is very sus. And then the missing rebus makes their sudden disappearance even more sus because Hunter knows Amity wanted to surprise Luz with it. Also, nobody knows why Hunter stole the rebus from Amity - they NEVER get the answer to this mystery. Hunter - nor Luz - never tell them why he stole it. He never tells them he stole it because he thought Belos was alive. So, it is perfectly logical for them to assume Luz and Hunter DIDNT know Belos was alive UNTIL he intercepted them at the graveyard. Edit: So they can assume Hunter took it so that he could impress Luz with the discovery of the titan blood.

It's so fucking funny to me. It makes it extra funny because they wrote such juicy drama UNINTENTIONALLY. This is the perfect storm for Amity to know about Hunter knowing Luzs secret before she did. It also the perfect set-up for confrontation between Hunter and Amity.

#lunter #this episode confirms Gus would cover for Hunter no matter what he does...

[mylittleredgirl]

finally, m*a*s*h update!

season four disc two! ("quo vadis, captain chandler" to "dear ma")

there is a LOT going on in the frank and margaret department

i kind of tipped my hand here when i posted about my new obsession, but even if you are not circling the drain on this doomed ship... the Unresolved Breakup Tension is fuckin WILD in this disc

she literally punches him in the face!!! how was that not a breakup!

but then he buys her something or does something to charm or impress her, and it works! then he blows it again!! rinse and repeat!!!! i am 👀🍿

sam and diane from cheers are still theeee platonic ideal of slap-slap-kiss but these clowns definitely walked so they could run

i literally jumped off the couch when his wife found out, aaaaa it's so juicy

I'M SORRY i realize this doesn't speak well of me as a person, but those long close-ups on her face as she voluntarily eavesdrops on him dismissing their relationship (twice!!) and her heart gets fully crushed??? i could eat popcorn to this all day.

this is the kind of dysfunctional relationship that my artist friends would choose in our youth so that we could Suffer and Make Art, so i really hope margaret is writing terrible poetry about it

anyway, we're peroxide-roots deep into GIRL WHY??!??

and then bj very gently explains to radar that well, see, frank and margaret both kinda suck and we're in the middle of nowhere, so they're all they've got

and i had to spend three or four days staring at the ceiling about it, because YEAH. it's not just that they're each other's only rank-appropriate source of star-spangled orgasms

(and they both care far more about military hierarchy than they do about marital fidelity)

but they are so consistently unkind to everyone around them that they have no other choice for any human connection full stop.

i'm not even talking about their ongoing bullying war with hawkeye and trapper or bj, because that's dirty pool on both sides, but i could count on one hand the number of times either of them have interacted with a subordinate nurse or enlisted man without threatening them. like they literally would not have anyone else to talk to.

but the reveal that she still wants to MARRY HIM? oh god. ohhhh honey. noooo.

that fake proposal prank was so genuinely mean. mostly because they ruined her hot date! 👏 let 👏 margaret 👏 fuck 👏 random 👏 dudes 👏

"isn't general barker the one who wanted you to spank him?" lmaoooo

OKAY i swear i can talk about other things:

hawkeye continues to just NOT pull without trapper here. the nurses are fully dismissing or ignoring his efforts, and honestly is he even trying that hard?? have we seen him get even one date?

i've been trying to come up with an "intricate rituals" joke about hawkeye and trapper but where the rituals are... girls. you get me.

i re-watched the pilot and the desk ep (for frank/margaret reasons DON'T JUDGE ME), and hawkeye and trapper LITERALLY end the pilot handcuffed together, and in the next episode talk about sharing a nurse. how am i supposed to take this???

speaking of nurses, you know that little 🙄 you have to ignore in 2024 whenever the women on m*a*s*h get called honey and sweetheart and baby on the job (though tbh i worked on a construction site and an ad sales office in the 2010's and got the same treatment -- but in the modern day it's done ironically babe)

BUT when potter calls margaret "good girl" after he gets shot??? total opposite feeling. i literally had to pause and take a moment. he's her dad now.

also when he tucks radar in???? everyone's dad actually

in loving memory of radar's other dad though, two important points:

how proud would henry have been of drunk & disorderly radar??

and henry's "i've always wondered if i might be radar's dad" bit is genuinely 900% funnier now that we know radar's mom looks EXACTLY like him.

i don't think i have ever circled back to talk about klinger, who became so so so awesome

it's so funny that in klinger's very first appearance and 30 times since then, he has been told straight up that wearing women's clothes will never work to get him out of the army. there's no explanation for his commitment to this particular form of passive resistance except that he genuinely loves it

the swamp rats built a still and klinger got a sewing machine and learned a craft. he's so good at it!! his looks are 🔥

i feel uncomfortable when i see him in fatigues tbh. it happened a few times in this disc and i would like it to Stop actually

also precious baby father mulcahey... Protect Him.

i LOVE that everyone showed up for his church service when the grand poobah chaplain was in town. they love each other!!! (also the life magazine jeep shoot!!!)

"quo vadis, captain chandler" was really good. i'm still over colonel flagg's whole deal but i now understand why everyone loves sidney freedman, and the guest actor they had playing not-jesus was incredible

bj continues to be the best little brother hawkeye could have asked for

also he maybe invented cpr?

i didn't say much about him here but I LOVE HIM and also his off-screen wife

forward and onward!!!

#it's about time i watched m*a*s*h #mashblogging #if anyone wants me to @ them in the notes when i do these let me know <3

[canonically47]

thoughts on the last few TD episodes that came out today?

massive spoilers on eps 9 - 13 of tdi 2023 s2 below (no duh)

i hate that caleb made finale. i was going crazy in the last bit begging for him to lose. his character was fine for so long, and i was so happy when him and priya made up, but then they were down in the trenches again, and the last few episodes were just a MESS for them and i hate them. i don't like the ship anymore. they're not good for each other. caleb just never listened to priya and was annoying, priya tried to KILL the guy?? and then she did not care at ALL about him winning, she just cared about julia losing. they were both pretty bad from episode 10 and further. i hated that. they were so good and then they just threw it all away. god :(

mullet julia... i love you so... on the topic of julia, i'm glad mkulia wasn't made canon. not because i don't like it - they're literally my banner and reason for my lesbian awakening, i love them so much - but because there wouldn't have been enough time and build-up. though i think MK could've stayed a few more episodes because caleb should've totally lost that challenge he won.

wayne was great this season. he started off pretty basic and kind of a background, underestimated character? but i love that he made finale and i was PRAYING for him to. and i am so glad he won. i would've been happy with him or julia, but i'm so glad it was him. and i love the shenanigans we got from him and his team. the way he loves not just raj and bowie, but damien and zee, so much. (wazeemien shippers probably loved these eps... my aroace wayne hc can't relate but i'm so glad to see traffic light hats yaoi winning.) and chase, ripper and axel rooting for him was great!

also loved seeing ripaxel again. i missed them more than i realized. axel getting ripper back up after he swallowed some sand by pulling him by a few strands of hair was hilarious. and i love that they just made out when they were in the background but never when the focus was on them. makes it funnier if it's not all up in your face.

have i said how much i love wayne... oh my god i think this season turned me into a real wayne stan. will i ever stop talking about him? probably not. stay tuned to find out.

again thank you to mkulia for not becoming canon because i need more build-up so it becomes canon in season 3. and now i can just make them fall in love in my fic instead. love you terry

damien was so robbed. thoughts and prayers to him. he deserved better <//3

many thoughts, most of them good!

#total drama #total drama island #total drama 2023 #total drama reboot #tdi #total drama spoilers #td spoilers #tdi spoilers #asks #my asks #anon #anonymous #answered ask

[magnorious]

Review: ‘We Take a Zebra to Vegas’, Percy Jackson Episode 6

***Spoilers Ahead for all books and show. TL;DR at the bottom***

After episode 5 I was starting to wonder if episode 3 was a fluke. Here we have the potential for the only non-book reference I wanted in the entire show: Would Nico cameo in the Lotus Casino?

Small, I know, but book fans were robbed of ever seeing him on screen once already when Titan’s Curse was never adapted and with his massive popularity, I was almost certain he’d be here. The closer we got to the Lotus Casino, however, the more I wanted to be wrong. Almost none of the characters look like they’re supposed to, many of them with inconsistent personalities to match. I went from hoping for a blink-and-you’ll miss it reference with a little scruffy 10-year-old that book fans would be able to tell is Nico by his appearance alone to hoping they’d not touch the matter with a 10-foot pole.

After the absurdly dramatic and angsty episode 5 that was supposed to be semi-dangerous and funny, there was a chance to have both the whimsy and wonder of the Lotus Casino, and the rather chilling escape. Before that, the conversation about conservation in the back of the zoo trafficking truck. There was a lot of opportunity for more quiet character moments as well as the adventure and absolutely no need for more nonsense filler.

Onto the episode and given that Hermes is in the thumbnail, are we all in agreement that he only exists here because he’s played by Lin Manuel Miranda? That’s the reason, right? He barely exists in the first book otherwise.

We start right off the bat with more interesting changes. Instead of IM-ing Luke in some random car wash, they do so in the zoo truck. The scene in the book was funnier, because it existed in the place that it did to be funny and the pay-to-pump water gave a clear time limit. But more importantly – they decided to scapegoat Clarisse… for reasons.

Why? Just why? In the book they spend 99% of their quest accusing the wrong person, Hades, and don’t realize they’re wrong until it’s too late. Everyone in the book was like “it’s Hades, it’s gotta be, his kids were Nazis” (a detail I still can’t believe exists, wow). Chiron said it was Hades, everyone said it was Hades, based on ancient biases that Hades spends the entire series proving wrong. He is the best godly parent by a country mile by the end of Book 5 and all of that groundwork started here, when Hades was just as much a victim of the Master Bolt nonsense as everyone else.

Clarisse is neither here nor there, because the writers didn’t have the foresight to script or film any scenes at camp of this random arrest that’s supposed to be important now. The jump cut from ‘the animals have a plan’ to them stopping traffic on the Vegas strip was funny, but it robbed the scene of the seriousness it should have had. More powers Percy doesn’t get: His ability to talk to horses and horse-adjacent animals.

Once they make it to the Lotus Casino, the script does this incredibly irritating thing where it removes the tension of the unknown from every hurdle they meet. Percy’s trapped alone against a mysterious monster in the book and has no idea how to beat it? Nope, Annabeth exposits all over it. They enter a seemingly-abandoned, mortal waterpark and only get suspicious once it’s too late? Nope, Annabeth figures out immediately that it’s a godly amusement park and they must be careful. Two twelve year olds and a satyr are immediately charmed by the glitz and glam of the lotus casino and get trapped for almost the rest of their time limit for the quest? Nope, Grover exposits all over that, too, ruining the mystery and any danger or threat.

Why?

The show also does the irritating thing where it creates problems just to solve them later and before you go “that’s the point of conflict” I mean it creates meaningless problems through meaningless contrivances, like every horror movie cliche that forces its characters to make illogical choices so they don’t just run away from the horror.

And another irritating thing! Spoiling bigger mysteries before their time: We didn’t learn about May Castellan until book 5. Why is this here? What purpose does this serve? Percy realizing he didn’t even know Luke’s last name for five whole years meant something to him. Seeing Luke’s tragic, mortal mother, after hating him for five years *means something* to Percy and to the readers. The gods damned Lotus Casino was absolutely not the place to discover any of this. Why did they do this?

Also, who tf is Augustus? He’s fine. Grover’s random side quest is fine. Every consecutive episode leaves me more and more annoyed with him, but it’s *fine*.

They do actually forget their purpose in the casino, thank the gods. Or, Grover does. Annabeth continues to give away May Castellan exposition like Halloween candy, smack-talking Hermes in a way that she’d never dare at 12 years old. Hermes is still only here because he’s played by Mr. Miranda. He’s fine, he’s just not Hermes. His “woe is me, loving mortals is so damn hard” speech exists. The sentiment is four books early, but it exists.

I understand why it’s here. They’re trying desperately to capture Percy’s internal conflict over whether or not the gods and his dad care about him, if he should let himself be disappointed presuming that they don’t. Problem is– in the book, Poseidon didn’t send a naiad to give him false promises of a clandestine meeting. In the book, the naiad told Percy there’d be a vague “gift” in Santa Monica, and Percy was never naive enough to think that gift would be his dad.

The entire season so far has tried to give nuance to both sides of the “do the gods care and should they be expected to” argument and it’s just not a very well written attempt. Why? Because it had five entire books to give both sides, and they’re shoving as much of it as they can here like they’re afraid they won’t get renewed for season 2. In doing so, they’ve made a tonal mess.

Once Hermes is gone and done randomly and spitefully sabotaging their quest, Percy, unseen, figures out that they’ve lost time and lost Grover. Also, Annabeth pick-pocketed the God of Thieves? Funny, but no. The script has its weird Mitichlorian moment sciencing lore by adding in the detail that lotus nectar or whatever is pumped in through the air, a question no one had and a plot hole that didn’t exist.

They do manage to keep the fear and unsettling realization that they’ve lost time, but their amnesia is inconsistent and confusing, considering that they overexplained how the casino works. Then they’re gone using a God of Thieves’ Car gimmick.

No Nico, thank the gods, unless he was one of the VR kids in the background. It would have been wonderful to see him in a better script.

In the book, they get instantly dazzled by the food, the video games, the nice clothes, nice suite, all things Percy could never dream about growing up poor. There is no Hermes and he only figures out something’s wrong when he meets other kids displaced from time and has to shake Annabeth and Grover from the illusion. They use their casino cash cards with infinite money to hail a cab all the way to LA and it’s funny.

They create more problems that didn’t need to exist by forcing Percy to drive a taxi and okay, that was genuinely funny. I am shocked, though, that Annabeth’s pride let him drive.

The episode comes to an end with them supposedly by the Santa Monica Pier… in a thunderstorm. In southern California. Odd choice, but okay. I'd say the storm exists because Poseidon's pissed but I really think it's there beacuse "dark and stormy night" fit their new vibe better than bright sunlight.

Maybe in live action it was tricky trying to make him both dry underwater and still plausibly underwater and not just rotoscoped in with a hazy green filter. For all their love of exposition, they never actually told non-book watchers about that, or that he can breathe underwater and control some currents. It’s also supposed to be night time, and yet he’s lit as if it’s high noon far above on the surface – they could have just written the beach scene at noon.

Then the naiad he was supposed to talk to in St Louis drops the bomb that the Summer Solstice deadline already passed, Poseidon got too impatient to wait for Percy after the casino delay, and the gods are now at war.

What the fu…..?

Percy resolves to keep going despite armageddon already happening apparently. She gives him exactly the right amount of pearls that he needs, not three, which would force him to choose, and then cut to black.

—

How is the best part of this episode Annabeth’s completely deadpan and exasperated Dude when Percy asks her not to make fun of him? That, and Percy driving the taxi.

Once again, to all the set designers and VFX artists and costumes and makeup and foley and music and score and everyone in between – you’re amazing, keep up the great work. To the actors, you were given a bad script and bad direction and you did the best you could.

Having just come off watching Game of Thrones for the first time and seeing little Arya, Bran, and Rickon Stark’s actors doing donuts around these three just goes to show that it’s not that child actors’ lack of experience that’s the problem. Heck even Baby Percy is better than these three. It’s how much or how little help they get in conveying what they’re supposed to. These kids were thrown to the wolves.

I don’t watch the teasers and I stay away from all marketing for the show. I don’t know who’s been cast to play any characters we haven’t already seen so what Hades and Poseidon look like are a complete mystery that I do hope pays off.

With two episodes to go they have the following left from the book to adapt: Crusty’s water beds, the DOA studios, the entire trip to the underworld and Cerberus and Hades that took two hefty chapters, the Ares fight, Percy’s trip to Olympus, Luke's betrayal and reveal, and the return home to find Hades had paid his debt.

Suddenly the mini series with an episode to burn in St Louis has to sprint to the finish line.

Maybe if they hadn’t spent ten minutes expositing with Hermes they could have at least crammed in Crusty and the DOA, but it looks like armageddon is already upon us so who knows? They might’ve just tossed out the rest of the book to write their own ending.

TL;DR This show is a mess and this episode actually has me nostalgic for the brevity of the horrible movie because they didn’t even try and it’s fun to make fun of. This is just disappointment stretched out across seven hours instead of speedrun in 90 minutes. The skeleton of the book (mostly) remains intact and to all those who keep saying “at least it’s not the movie,” you’re right. Enjoy.

#pjo series #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson #review #pjo

[kerubimcrepin]

Liveblog 5: many words much analysis

His favorite parenting technique: Bullshitting

Yet again, we have the tenets of Lou theorizing reiterated here by Kerubim and Simone, as well as this flashback:

She left sad, and unlike many other times, without any anger for Kerubim.

She left Luis with him to watch over him.

She also left Luis because he couldn't go with her, but that could mean many things.

She left after Ecaflip City, obviously, and at that time, their relationship seemed the healthiest. (Well, as healthy as it could be.)

Unlike all the other times, Kerubim didn't go searching for her. It seems this separation was final in a way no other was, and there had to be a reason that he didn't go and try to make up. An unsolvable issue.

Both Luis and Kerubim blame Kerubim, and the first one uses this to make the second one angry.

Adieu, translated here as Farewell, is a word used for when you never expect to see one another ever again.

And sure, Luis really hated that. To the point of not allowing anyone to clean him ever again.

And yet...

That's what I thought you'd say, you lying asshole. In this liveblog, so far, I had taken a stance against referencing future episodes, but I feel the need to pinpoint this now:

Aux Tresors De Kerubim is a show that will lie, cheat, and deceive you. A show that is incredibly transparent about being at least a little bit, but an in-universe fiction.

Kerubim Crepin is a man who has mastered the art of not really lying, but, more-so, fudging the situation. Usually for the better.

And, as seen from this screenshot of the shop as it was two years before Joris was born, sometimes, for the worse.

Kerubim had many ways to solve his situation — convince Luis to let him clean once in a while via the use of psychic warfare, find a different house, or clean while Luis was sleeping, which Luis canonically does, like Kerubim will later do, after Simone is gone, because unlike her, he's not good at not pissing Luis off.

Or, perhaps, he could have continued doing whatever maintenance he was doing, during the time Atcham showed up and tried to boil him in a sauna. Because back then, Luis was allowing him to clean the house. Just food for thought!

Even Luis doesn't really like the situation they're in.

So, letting himself and their home go, never trying to get them out of this situation, — are both his active failings as a parent, not something he passively went through.

There is absolutely no excusing the way he raised Joris.

So yeah. I will just have to make these two into soup.

The thing is, his lying doesn't come from malice at all.

Kerubim hates disappointing people or appearing weak, because, as we'll see, from his personal experience, relationships just don't end well if you present your authentic self without thinking, or just don't lie well enough. He will keep lying in even the most dire circumstances, because not being good enough is the worst sin he could partake in.

He doesn't really have a self-esteem, or a way to like himself, without outside validation, because of the sheer brainrotting trauma of his childhood and his relationship with Ecaflip. And it just so happens, that being a parent is having a little validation machine running around... As long as the child believes he is competent and an indisputable authority, that is.

Which Joris will, one day, realize, just isn't true.

(hint: before the end of Aux Tresors, but fully set in stone in the movie.)

.......yeah to end it on a funnier note, i really do think Kerubim Crepin shouldn't have been at the club.

he should have been getting therapy. he should have been doing inner child healing. he should have been researching coping mechanisms for cluster b personality disorders, of which he has 2. Imagine having a kid instead of therapy.

Choosing beggar Keke!

If they ever make a second Dofus movie via crowdfunding, I will enshrimpify myself. I think she would destroy Bakara's cringe teenager self. I think Bakara would be jealous of her and Joris's aunt-nephew relationship.

...Yeah I love Bakara and Simone a lot. How could you tell?

Some canonical info on Luis's cleaning protocols.

When Kerubim thinks things are going bad, it's "It'll be ok! Don't worry! We can make it!" When Kerubim is suffering through it, it's "I don't know. Don't ask me. I don't know. Probably. Not a good situation." But when Kerubim truly loses all hope, it's "THIS IS ALL MY FAULT, AND I FAILED YOU, AND I'M AWFUL, AND I'M NOTHING, and it's OVER, and we are going to DIE."

A very helpful thing to keep in mind, to see how distraught he is during various events.

He's good at putting on a casual front while under stress, but it means that when he cracks, his fears burst out like an ocean and take him out of the commission entirely.

It's both a character flaw, and a strength of his, allowing him to not lose hope even at the worst times / help others not feel as distraught. We will see this in some significant, albeit very subtle, portrayals of his character in the Wakfu OVA, as well as the ease with which he takes control of dangerous situations.

Him being insecure and a liar never really changes, but he really does do it all out of love.

One of the most significant lines of this show. It appears both in the second episode, and second-to last episode, expressing one of the main themes of the show: the uneven, often clumsy and painful, nature of love and family. From a chance meeting that doesn't go the best, like here, to, well... the way it's used later the second time.

Kerubim's musings on items in this scene introduce the other theme: Stagnation, progress, and memory. In his opinion, it is only natural for artefacts to pass through different hands, instead of being locked up in a vault. Yet, Kerubim himself is stuck in this shop, collecting dust, being a subpar parent to his son, and never moving on from a multitude of painful break-ups that happened decades ago.

Joris's recitation of his words introduces his, for now, unwavering belief in his papycha. Which makes Kerubim's insecure self feel very giddy and loved.

Then, Simone kicking them out promptly introduces the theme of her being literally the best.

It must feel nice for Joris to see their home look good for the first time in his life. As sad as it is, I am very happy for him. The way he begins running around the house, looking at everything, while Kerubim is walking around in a literal daze, is just so adorable. Makes me even forget I want to make his dad into soup, for a little bit.

This brings us to a close with episode 2. Here's to more insane posts to come.

#wakfu #dofus #krosmoz #ro liveblogs dofus #kerubim crepin #joris jurgen #tagging because I managed to do a lot of character analysis here #ep2

[andyling]

Okay now that I got my Tango rambling out of the way IT’S TIME FOR A BUNCH OF OTHER PEOPLE

Jimmy Solidarity (aka the man sending team rancher fans into a collective breakdown, it’s me I'm team rancher fans)

stealth mission IMMEDIATELY failed

THE FACT THAT TANGO WAS OUT OF RANGE OF THE BOMB AND THEN RAN RIGHT UNDER IT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Tango congratulating Jimmy on killing him (even though it was Joel) Team Ranchers is still alive guys I swear, NO ANGST HERE IT’S FINE GUYS

Love how Joel is being attacked and Grian is nowhere to be found because he’s too busy hunting down Impulse

jimmy shouting tango’s name and literally jumping towards him as he places tnt counts as a rancher moment 

either he’s stupid or he was confident tango wouldn’t blow him up, it’s probably the former but hey I choose how I interpret this chaos

JIMMY WAS SO CLOSE TO DYING HOLY SHIT 

JIMMY’S FUCKING FACE WHEN MARTYN STARTED ATTACKING ETHO

mans was literally just :O

“what I'm realizing right is that everyone is thirsty” did ya have to phrase it like that??? I can hear the out of context compilations clipping this

Jimmy sounding so shocked that Tango was fighting Martyn as if he didn’t just spend several minutes fending him off from killing Joel

oh uh, the flower husbands are fighting

SCOTT THROWING TANGO UNDER THE BUS BRUUUUUUUH

damn flower husbands enjoyers must be in absolute misery

anyways WOO JIMMY DIDN’T GO AFTER TANGO, GUYS THE RANCHERS ARE FINE WE DON’T NEED TO MAKE ANGST FROM THIS

JIMMY AND MARTYN FIGHTING TO KILL SCOTT AJFSJAKFHDSHJGK

love how Jimmy is not even trying to find Tango he’s just there watching this chaos unfold

“guys he’s not gonna respond” Jimmy you underestimate how dumb your rancher is, there is a reason I call both of you wet cats

WHY IS THERE REDSTONE BLOOD EVERYONE?????

JOEL JUST WENT SPLAT

the way jimmy hunches over closer to his mic when he’s whispering is so funny, he’s trying to hide irl 

ah yes, “the bad boys bread bridge bakery in the sky” my beloved

hey now Jimmy has been trying to protect Joel for half the session don’t kick him out, I mean he failed but at least he was trying

ending the session with robbery, how wonderful

Grain

“looking tasty” aaaaand that’ going into the out of context compilation

JOEL SOUNDS SO DISTRAUGHT THAT HE KILLED CLEO

Grian seems to be extra manic this episode, I'm blaming that on the fact that he missed a session

the entire “definitely” bit is so stupid but I find it so funny

GRIAN WAS TRYING SO HARD TO GET IMPULSE AND ENDED UP DYING INSTEAD AJFHSAJFHDSSFKJSDGF

“normally this is last episode behavior” I mean last session was last episode behavior too I think this season has just made everyone crazy

DUDE GRIAN WAS SO SURE THAT TNT MINECART FAILED AND THEN HE GOT A TRIPLE KILL

HE ALMOST KNOCKED HIMSELF OFF THE PLATFORM IN HIS SHOCK

oh my god the yellow hoard is even funnier from their perspective

the pufferfish plays are insane goddamn

THE TANGO CHASE IS EVEN FUNNIER FROM GRIAN’S POV OH MY GOD SERIOUSLY HOW DID THEY NOT CATCH HIM

THEY JUST KEEP CALLING HIM AND HE RESPONDS FROM WHO KNOWS WHERE IN THE FUNNIEST VOICE

“How about we just kill him for fun now?” SCAR NO

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE’S A WARDEN NEARBY HELLO?!??!?!

tango just has a 6th sense for wardens now

awwwwww grian’s sharing in order to help skizz (pity totem is still totem)

someone is gonna trap those ender-porters I just know it

THAT WAS SUCH A WASTE OF A TOTEM 

MARTYN INTHELITTLEWOOD EVERYBODY

the mean gills chatting on their little island resort really contrasts how badly the rest of this session is gonna go

WELL DAMN SCOTT SMAJOR

THE FACT THAT MARTYN SAW THE TNT MINECART AND FUCKING BOOKED IT THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION HE WAS SO CLOSE TO DYING

Bdubs running to Etho for protection is hilarious in every POV

the bread bois and team ties have a fast travel to each other . . . we’ll see how that works out (please become allies please please please)

LOVE HOW MARTYN ACKNOWLEDGES THE OUT OF CONTEXT VIDEOS NOW AFJKHSAJKGHDKSGKH

MARTYN ON HIS PSYCHO ARC OH MY FUCKING GOD

MARTYN’S DECISION TO TURN ON ETHO WAS SO QUICK AND IT’S SO OBVIOUS HERE HE JUST LOOPED AROUND AND STABBED HIM

Martyn didn’t even realize Tango was still trying to kill him lmao

THE PUFFERFISH DIED IN THE EXPLOSION OH NO

poor scar stood in the wrong place at the wrong time

Etho trying desperately to get people to leave Tango and Impulse alone

MARTYN WAS SO FAR AWAY HOW DID THAT TNT MINECART KILL HIM HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THE RANGE ON THOSE THINGS?!?!?!

god Martyn is just having an awful time trying to stay alive this session

DUDE THE SCRAMBLE TO SEE WHO WOULD KILL SCOTT FIRST IS WAY MORE INTENSE FROM MARTYN’S POV FUCKING HELL

bruh Martyn really teasing us all with actual lore 

So uh, yeah that session was bonkers SEE Y’ALL NEXT WEEK

#letting everyone die more often was such a good decision #so much chaos #this session was amazing #SO EXCITED FOR THE NEXT ONE #people gonna start going red #uh oh spagettio #limited life smp #limited life #limited life spoilers #24lsmp #limlsmp #traffic life series #traffic life smp #traffic life spoilers #jimmy solidarity #grian #martyn inthelittlewood #tangotek #smajor #smallishbeans #team ties #bad bois #mean gills #team rancher

[mishacollinsthighsss]

I'm still not over what happened, but I have brain worms and they most likely make absolutely no sense and don't even go together but I need to get them out, so heh... guess you guys have to suffer.

THIS PROBABLY WILL INCLUDE A LOT OF TINHATTING BOTH FOR DESTIEL AND COCKLES.

You still there? Great, let's get into my not medicated adhd brain a little.

First of all, starting Friday: The Album Drop

...do I need to say more? No? Well too bad, because I'm going to 😂 I'm a huge music freak, been singing since I was four, play guitar and the piano (I didn't say good okay, I'm actually very jealous of Jensen) and I've been obsessed with lyrics for pretty much forever. Alright, call me crazy but this album is so Dean Winchester coded it's unreal. Every song could be put together with Dean and I'm not even joking. You know what's even funnier? THAT THE DAMN SONG JENSEN AND MISHA PUT TOGETHER YESTERDAY COULD VERY WELL END UP AS A RADIO COMPANY SONG. The lyrics definitely needs some work (probably making it more vague), but... come on. The first thing my mind jumped to when I realized what Jensen was singing was Watching Over Me. MOVING ON.

Second: Jensen's answer about the Destiel reunion

This hole thing still drives me crazy. This was probably the clearest answer we've even gotten from Jensen, plus we got confirmation that he'd like to see a Destiel reunion AND ADDRESSING CAS' GOODBYE (I wanna say here that at this point I have no idea how that would play out if it would be something like "Hey buddy, I don't feel that way but I don't wanna lose you" or a full on love confession from Dean... I have no idea and that's okay, because I know Jensen knows how important that confession was to a lot of us, so I trust him not to invalidate Cas' feelings). Now, I paid a little attention to the words he said about maybe seeing it: first, he said that hopefully we'll get to see that at some point, and later he said maybe we won't. This immediately jumped out to me and you know what my brain did? Let me tell you: Jensen said that he doesn't talk about possible project before they aren't under the wraps because he doesn't wanna jinx them. Now hear me out: first, he said maybe we'll get to see it. Then he backtracked. He's talked about a reboot/6-10 episode thing for forever now. He WANTS to come back. My tinhat is firmly in place when I say that I have no doubt he's working on it already, but it isn't greenlit yet (hence the backtrack later). The description was just too specific to be made up out of thin air. (Watch me regretting those words later because I'm just too hopeful.)

Third and last: Whatever that Cockles Panel was

Listen, I could scream about them forever, we all know what went down, the only thing I wanna point out is: When Jensen said "...which is funny because so do I" he looked flustered as hell, we all know that by now. What gets me is that Misha had basically no reaction to this (he looked down, but that's it). So, did they plan something like that? I don't know, I just think it's weird as hell to have no reaction to something like this, especially when it's your "best friend" and he says that in front of hundreds of people.

(Plus, a little side note: still not over how you can SEE Jensens brain working while he's nervously rubbing his thigh.)

I don't even wanna go into the lyrics they wrote together, I've talked about it during the first point already, but something I wanna add is that I loved jensens face journey as Misha first mentioned the brothers but then immediately jumped to "The Angel". That was hilarious and by God, Jensen was planning on throwing together something romantic.

I'm very much not fine as you can tell, but it feels like the universe has shifted after the non-existent finale and now it's our turn. I always try to keep my expectations low, but the album and this whole weekend catapulted me right into the sun, so now all I can see is light and stars and it's wonderful.

#how do i even tag this #cockles #destiel #cockles tinhatting #destiel tinhatting #i guess #i feel like ive lost my mind #somebody pull me down to earth again #i cant take another hit #i need to lower my expectations but how does one do that #idek #if youve read all of this im so sorry

[lazanskywrites]

Glee Was Ahead of It's Time.

You either love or hate Glee there is absolutely zero in-between. It's like the "cilantro soap-tasting gene", you decide whether you like it or not in one try. In my opinion, Glee is a masterpiece and I am prepared to die on this hill. Here are my top five reasons why Glee is one of my favorite shows.

My controversial take though, Glee was only good until halfway through season five. With that being said, the first reason why Glee is my favorite show is because the original cast is iconic. The original Glee Club members slowly fizzle out of the show, having random cameos here and there. This is why, to me, the last seasons are hard to watch. No amount of new characters will top the original characters, they were funnier and had better acting.

The fourth reason Glee is my favorite show is because the comedy was ahead of its time. Countless skits in the show are similar to those in today's comedic world on TikTok or YouTube. But Glee is slowly losing popularity as other shows and movies are produced. The writing and comedic timing of these attached clips are another reason why I and plenty of others still watch Glee.

The third reason I love Glee is for their celebrity cameos. John Stamos, Neil Patrick Harris, Britney Spears, Ricky Martin, Olivia Newton-John, and Jennifer Coolidge, the list goes on and on. Every celebrity has an important role in the episode or the season they're featured in. For example, John Stamos' character was dating a teacher involved in the Glee Club. Ricky Martin was a Spanish teacher who taught the Glee Club about Latin music. And Olivia Newton-John was alongside Jane Lynch's character in a music video.

The amount of A-list celebrities the directors were able to feature in only six seasons is outstanding. It shows how popular this show became as more episodes were filmed.

Fourthly, Glee would be nothing without the music (literally). Were all the covers good? Absolutely not. But the good covers were good covers. Every character has a handful of songs that were praised in the Glee fandom, but Rachel, Mercedes, and Blaine had hit after hit. As much as I dislike both Rachel Berry and Lea Michelle, she can sing. Rachel's standout song for me was "Don't Rain On My Parade", it perfectly highlights her vocal talent and the attitude her character brings to the show.

Mercedes has just as powerful of a voice as Rachel and Mercedes does not hold back. Her character was hilarious and full of talent, but she often got overshadowed by her peers. There are songs her peers had performed I think she would've performed ten times better. This isn't a solo, but it's my favorite song of hers. The context of the song is hilarious and the music video is pure 2010s vibes.

Finally, Blaine Anderson. On TikTok, there is a joke being spread that any song Blaine has covered in Glee is better than the original. They call it the "Blaine Anderson effect". Similar to the "Kelly Clarkson effect" which is when Kelly Clarkson covers a song and outdoes the original artist. I listen to Blaine's covers like they're originals. I could go on and on about how many good covers he has in Glee. Today, Darren Criss still performs outstanding covers. My favorite Blaine cover has to be "Bills, Bills, Bills".

The fifth and final reason why I love Glee is none other than Jane Lynch. Without fail, she'll always be the funniest character in every episode. What I appreciate about her character is the soft side she tries to cover up with crass jokes towards students and colleagues. Realizing why she is protective and patient with Becky it makes you see her from a different perspective. I love Sue Sylvester so much that I dressed up as her for Halloween.

It takes a certain person to truly enjoy Glee so it's not surprising that I'm one of the only people out of all my friends who enjoy watching an episode or two every night.

You thought I was kidding about the Halloween costume?

#glee #blog #suesylvester #blaine anderson #mercedesjones #rachel berry #naya rivera #glee club #matthew morrison #music

[whatisthismandoinghere]

So I’ve watched a good chunk of seasons 3 and 4 of Laramie as well as a few from season 1 and I am now gonna make it all yall’s problem and bless you with my commentary and clips from each episode, enjoy I guess 😂

Without further ado, S1.EP1 Stage Stop

Not the outlaw being upset they spelled his name wrong in the newspaper 😂

Jess’s introduction to Laramie was absolutely terrible, poor guy just got shot at. Absolutely love how he just ignored the lawman when he was told to stop though, a very Jess thing to do 🤣

Jess and Slim’s first meeting is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. Let’s take a look at it, shall we?

I mean the first shot alone where they show the sign “Sherman Ranch, No Trespassing” and then cut to Jess just lounging around like he owns the place 😂 

And the dialogue:

Slim: What’re you doing here?

Jess: Gettin’ a crick in my back!

Plus this gem:

Jess: I had 3 or 4 swallows out of your private stream. My horse helped himself too, so you just figure out what I owe you, and I’ll be on my way. Oh, and uh, I looked at a bird flying over. Will there be a charge for that?

Look Jess I love you so much but who gave you the right to be so freaking sassy 😂 (we adore him for it though) but Slim had valid concerns, I see both sides of the situation here. I mean Jess, you should’ve read the sign, and I can see why Slim is wary of strangers, but I too would be ticked off if someone just showed up and was holding me at gunpoint

Not Jess just sending Slim flying 😂 boy don’t mess around

Overall I think this first meeting went really well you guys

Andy is so flipping adorable and I would die for him, the way he just gets along so well with Jess right off the bat 😭 10x funnier that he’s Slim’s brother though 🤣

Look at the racoon! And the way Andy washed his food for him 🥺 it's so cute how this little gesture shows how much he knows about animals and how much he cares for them

When Jess dozed off and Andy came in and startled him and he just whipped around with his gun and when he realized it was Andy and he was so apologetic 😭 but just gets me thinking about Jess being a loner and a drifter and being so used to looking out for himself yet still being so compassionate to this kid he just met. He’s so good with kids and I think it’s just darling seeing him interact with Andy and later on Mike.

Ugh I’m having so many Thoughts on Jess’s childhood, of course they are of the angsty variety, all prompted by these lines of dialogue (putting them in different colors so it's easier to differentiate between them):

Andy: Jess, how old were you when you first went out on your own?

Jess: Can’t hardly remember when I wasn’t on my own, like Jeremiah here and Sam. Only I didn’t find a soft touch like you. Maybe I didn’t want one. 

Andy: Do you like it better alone?

Jess: It just worked out that way.

Andy: Don’t you get lonely sometimes?

Jess: You get used to it.

As if these lines weren't heart breaking enough, Jess's tone of voice and facial expressions just really added to it. Yes there will be fics in the future no I do not need more wips

Jess had a fractured skull you say?? *adds to list of details to keep in mind for later*

Look at them playing cards together <3 yes I totally get that Andy's complete and total willingness to trust anyone who comes along is a bit concerning but it's also so sweet and I just love how he interacts with Jess

The way Andy was just working up the courage to ask Jess to take him with him and Jess being so gentle and telling him maybe when he’s older their relationship is everything you guys 😭

I know at times Slim seems a little harsh on Andy but he really just wants the best for him and it’s sweet. 

Love how Jonesy just deescalates the situation so smoothly and just calmly drags Slim away 😂

I’ve noticed that Jess gets called saddle tramp an awful lot so I’m starting a running count, we are currently at 1

Jonesy saying Slim is just a kid is just… it’s kinda funny but at the same time - how do I want to explain this? - like Slim is out here saying Andy needs to get things figured out, needs to become a better judge of character, and then Jonesy is just like “you’re figuring things out too pally. you’re responsible for your kid brother now and you still got some things to learn” You can see that Jonesy knows Slim really well and I love their dynamic

Jess was so ready to end Slim right then and there 😂 what can I say, I like my men violent 🤣 seriously tho the fact that Jess and Slim were just constantly beating each other up throughout this entire episode before they decided to try running a ranch together is the funniest thing

Everything about Bud Carlin irritates me, the way he speaks, the way he moves, his whole demeanor, I just hate it 😂

When Carlin’s asking about how long it takes the stage to get there once it’s in sight and Jonesy’s just out here throwing in a bunch of random circumstances to avoid answering 🤣 and then Carlin gets so irritated that he decides to ask Jess instead lol but Andy just immediately telling him what he wants to know so Jess doesn’t get hurt 😭 bless his little heart AND JONESY REACHING HIS ARM OUT TO GRAB THE GUY WHEN HE WENT TO PUNCH JESS Jonesy's a real one

When Jess and Andy are out in the barn shoeing the horse and Andy tries to grab a rifle and Jess stops him cuz he didn’t want him to get hurt 😭

Oh when Carlin makes Jess punch Slim in the face… like we know they were about to go at it when he walked in but now Jess is like no way, the friendship is progressing you guys, and poor Slim was just like "do it", somebody get this poor man some ice and an ibuprofen

But as soon as Carlin makes Jess hit Slim that third time he turned on Carlin so fast

Andy’s voice was almost breaking when he saw Slim laying on the ground and he was trying to wake him up and it almost broke me 😭

The way they all go to check on Slim as soon as the guy leaves the room 🥺

Andy was just begging Jess to go with Slim so that he’d have some help and Jess wouldn’t go and then Andy has tears in his eyes and says “No wonder you travel alone, who’d wanna team up with a saddle tramp like you?” nooooooo 😭 I really act like I’ve never seen this episode before also Jess saddle tramp count is now at 2

They really just threw that guy out of the stagecoach, that wasn’t very nice

JESS CAME BACK yes I already knew this would happen, hush your timing is impeccable pally

Look at these idiots (affectionate) 😂

Alright I'm gonna write out this scene for you because Reasons (once again in color so it's easier to differentiate):

Pete: I’m hurt bad, Jess. Don’t shoot.

Jess: I was hurt bad too. And it wasn’t just the money Pete.

Pete: I didn’t take it Jess. I swear I didn’t

*Pete proceeds to grab for his gun and Jess shoots him again, sending him flying off the cliff*

So satisfying yall also that dialogue though, I sense another fic in the future

Not the fanning of the guns, ugh I hate when they do that and Jess does it all the time

I love how Jess just puts his gun away and lets Slim deal with Carlin on his own, the way he just saunters over while they’re fist fighting and the way they replay the bit Carlin pulled on them when he made Jess hit Slim, sheer perfection 🤣

Aw Andy was so excited to see Jess and Slim back safely 🥺

Friendship has been established pallies, that is what we call ✨character development✨

Also if you haven’t noticed I’m a tad bit obsessed with Jess ok maybe more than a tad so here’s some bonus gifs of him being sassy 😂❤️

#yes i'm aware i talk way too much #it will happen again #laramie #episode analysis #stage stop #jess harper #slim sherman

[guppieishere]

Smiling Critter OC Fun Facts! (+ Silly doodles)

because I gotta talk about them or I will explode

under the cut cuz it got longer than I thought it would lol

💙 🎭 Randy RatTrick 🎭 💙

Randy has an interest in the performing arts! Specifically theatre, but he also dabbles in close up magic tricks (his last name is a pun on Hat Trick after all lmao).

Randy’s character was inspired by Swiper from Dora the Explorer and Pete in Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. They both tend to play antagonistic, even villainous roles, but aren’t actually evil, and will actually help the main characters out every so often. Though, in Randy’s case, it takes him a bit to get to that point.

CatNap is the only one of the critters that Randy never really becomes friends with. They might have moments of mutual understanding, but in general, the best they get to is being willing to work together towards a common goal. Like, if someone was being mean to their friend, they’d work together to beat the shit out of that guy.

Randy’s favorite food is pasta. It’s also the only food he knows how to cook, for some reason.

Randy is very genre savvy. If he recognizes a common trope in a situation he’ll lampshade the hell out of it.

Randy is Gay!

💜 🎤 Rozzie Rockoon 🎤 💜

Rozzie is a fan of pretty much all genres of music, but her favorites are rock and roll, country, and jazz.

Rozzie names all her instruments. When asked about this, she’ll respond with, “What? You don’t?”

Rozzie’s oldest and favorite instrument is a Spanish guitar she named Salma.

Rozzie’s often gets her name mispronounced as “Rosie.” It used to bother her a lot, but nowadays she doesn’t really care.

She often struggles to come up with lyrics for songs. The melody and instrumentation come a lot easier to her.

Once, she stayed up late trying to write lyrics for a song, and somehow, CatNap caught wind of it and appeared in her house to convince her to go to sleep. It scared the shit out of her, and she still has no idea how CatNap got into her house.

Rozzie’s favorite food is cherry pie.

Rozzie is Aroace!

🤎 🔔 Clever Cowbelle 🔔 🤎

Clever and Bubba have a bit of a rivalry. Not nearly as bad as CatNap and Randy, but enough to cause occasional wacky science hijinks. In her hypothetical debut episode of the hypothetical cartoon, they would actually have known each other prior to said episode.

Clever is secretly jealous of Bubba, as he’s able to make friends relatively easily, something Clever struggles with. Her jealousy is part of what fuels her half of the rivalry. Good luck getting her to admit it, though.

Clever has a tendency to refer to people by their last name instead of their first name, out of a desire to seem more “proper.” The closer she is to someone, the more likely she is to call them by their first name.

Clever’s favorite drink is hot chocolate. She drinks the stuff like it’s coffee. Or alcohol. Whatever’s funnier for the scenario.

Clever is very smart, except when it comes to her and other people’s emotions. She is not very good at comforting people, but she tries.

Clever’s goggles are a comfort item for her. She only takes them off to sleep.

Clever is Bisexual and Transfem!

🩷 🧭 GobyGills 🧭 🩷

GobyGills gained his legs after finding a magic pearl on the seafloor. Not realizing it was magical, he made a wish to explore somewhere new, and the pearl granted it by giving him legs and sending him to land.

Goby needs the pearl to transform between his legged form and tail form. If he loses the pearl, he’s stuck in whatever form he was in when he lost it, until he finds it again.

Goby struggled with walking when he first arrived on land. Even after learning to walk, he’s still very clumsy, often tripping over nothing. He’s much more nimble underwater.

Goby looks up to Bubba for his intelligence.

Goby mispronounces words a lot. This annoys Bubba greatly, though he tries not to show it. There’s a running gag of the other critters accidentally using the mispronounced words.

Goby’s favorite food changes every week. In his words, “They’re all just so good! How could I pick?”

Goby is Pansexual!

#guppie says words #smiling critters #smiling critters cartoon #smiling critters ocs #poppy playtime #poppy playtime chapter 3 #randy rattrick #rozzie rockoon #clever cowbelle #gobygills #guppie’s cool art #this got long lmao