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leverage-ot3 · 2 months

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What are your k drama recommendations??!? I need new ones

omg my time has come thank you anon for giving me the opportunity to ramble about shows

I ended up talking WAY too long so I'm putting everything after the first one under the cut

all of us are dead- show about high schoolers as a zombie apocalypse starts. very funny and relatable, literally they call the police and are like 'have you seen train to busan?' bffrrn. has a lot of social commentary and there are references to the sinking of mc sewol (a cruise that sunk where the captain deserted it and left a large amount of high schoolers to drown). commentary about how adults save themselves first/leave youth to fend for themselves. one of my comfort shows and although they didn't intend for more seasons, it was received so well that they have been renewed! I am also an ot4 truther and sometimes talk about them on my international shows sideblog: @nam-on-jo

sweet home- (disclaimer: I am not caught up and have not yet seen s2 which came out a little while ago) honestly I have no idea how to explain this so I'm gonna copy-paste the blurb: as humans turn into savage monsters, one troubled teenager and his neighbours fight to survive and to hold onto their humanity. basically people turn into monsters for [redacted] reasons and everyone in his large apartment building is stuck inside trying to fend for their lives.

my name- I'm just going to paste the blurbs going forward because it's easier: Following her father's murder, a revenge-driven woman puts her trust in a powerful crime boss -- and enters the force under his direction. bro some of these twists I expected but others caught me off guard. I love the main character and am a little gay for her but I think that's valid because she's a bamf. there was a plot point at the end of the second to last episode that I really didn't like and made me very upset. narratively I get why they did it but it made me sad so I'm still pissy. might get around to writing a fix-it fic one day when motivation strikes because my girl deserves better things.

the guest- a detective, a catholic priest, and a psychic join forces to fight crime caused by supernatural forces. not to say they are my ot3 but they kinda are. (other ppl interpret it is a lesbian and her two bi/gay bffs which I also accept but. ot3 tho). LOVED every twist and turn and how the three of them go from not trusting one another to being family. genuinely one of my favorites from all the kdramas I've watched over the years and I want to rewatch it again soon

happiness (tvn)- The residents of a high-rise apartment fight for their lives against a deadly infectious disease while Sae-bom and Yi-hyun try to find the person because of whom the virus spread. bro I adored this. some characters annoyed me (which means they were written effectively) but it has so much. fake dating/marriage (they wanted a better apartment lmao). annoyances to lovers. mean/rude woman soft for sunshine man. what you will do for the people you love. morals and humanity during a catastrophy. *smacks show* you can fit so much into this. no but seriously, I thought this was a really interesting take on the zombie virus! so some of the time you come off completely asymptomatic and 'normal', so people can get away with acting normal and hiding the disease around other people, so the paranoia and mystery is REALLY amped up. had me guessing a LOT. sae-bom and yi-hyun are both cops/detectives and you find out really early (ep 1/2?) that sae-bom is immune which gives a really interesting dynamic that leaves her (to yi-hyun's exasperation and heightened blood pressure levels) to be kinda reckless in the pursuit of truth and salvation. I'm rambling now because this is making me watch to rewatch but yeah as a zombie/dystopia/apocalypse lover this was a good watch. it's more story-focused than violence-heavy which was a cool and refreshing twist

alice in borderland- okay y'all I am aware people had mixed feelings about s2 but overall I did enjoy the series. 'Obsessed gamer Arisu suddenly finds himself in a strange, emptied-out version of Tokyo in which he and his friends must compete in dangerous games in order to survive.' what can I say, I love a dystopian-esque setting.

the silent sea- imma be real, I only watched it for loml bae doona from sense8. 'During a perilous 24-hour mission on the moon, space explorers try to retrieve samples from an abandoned research facility steeped in classified secrets.' basically earth is in severe crisis mode as they run out of water to drink. water has recently been found on the moon, and although there was a mysterious tragedy that happened previously to researchers looking for water in a base on the moon, they have reached a level of desperation where they have another mission to look for moon water. mystery, paranoia, a couple of good twists ensue. I thought it was pretty good even though I have some mixed feelings about the open ending.

semantic error- yes I am sliding a bl into this list. bitch you thought. of course my bl-loving self would mention this (I forgot about it until I looked up good kdramas to remind myself of stuff I have watched). 'A strict, rule-abiding computer science major must work together with an artist with a polar-opposite personality to his.' confident cool boy meets bitch boy. it's great.

and of course...

leverage con artists- I would be fired from running this blog if I didn't mention the beloved korean spinoff of leverage. 'The series follows the story of Lee Tae-joon, a former insurance investigator who forms a team of thieves and con artists to target the rich and wealthy. The team was also formed to avenge Tae-joon's son's death.' I've posted about it before so I won't go super into it but it's VERY camp, a good time, and the ot3 is alive and well. debatable more overt than their predecessor!

other mentionables:

I tried watching kingdom (again for bae doona) but couldn't really get into it. might try again later because it's critically acclaimed (I think) and has even gotten a spinoff series

my roommate really liked mr queen. I didn't really pay attention when we were in the same room and they were watching it but it's fruity

the island on amazon prime was good! interesting plot but not in my top 10 or anything. worth a watch if you're looking for a kdrama to watch in your spare time. features girlboss businesswoman being thrown into a world of the supernatural because [redacted]. supernatural black horse man keeps her safe while keeping a life-changing secret.

let's fight ghost was a thai show that I saw and loved that was adapted into a kdrama called bring it on ghost, but honestly I couldn't get through it because I liked the thai one better.

train to busan is technically a movie but it's iconic and well-known and I highly suggest watching it if you like zombie/apocalypse movies. disclaimer: kdramas do not have the slow 'walker' zombies. they are fucking fast and the stuff of my nightmares. would probably just jump off a bridge if this actually happened ngl

I did think that extraordinary attorney woo was cute. I never finished it and know that there are VERY valid criticisms about the perpetuation of media portraying people with autism in the stereotypical savant ways. however, I liked how the love interest accepted her for who she was, loved her because of who she was and made efforts to accommodate and learn how to comfort her in ways that would work for her

business proposal was pretty decent if you like lighthearted romance- I didn't finish it but would like to at some point

tale of the nine tailed was another one that my roommate and I started watching but never finished. it was alright! just lost interest

shows on my watchlist:

black knight (netflix)- 'In a dystopian future devastated by air pollution, the survival of humanity depends on a group of deliverymen known as the Black Knights who navigate the wastelands using unconventional means.'

copycat killer-

hellbound (netflix)-

shop for killers (hulu)- 'A nephew who lost his parents and grew up in the hands of an uncle who runs a shopping mall faces a new truth after his uncle's sudden death.'

the legend of the blue sea (viki + hulu)- 'A magistrate's plan to release mermaids into the ocean backfires when they're caught by fishermen.' (legit I just miss mermaid media)

gyeongseong creature (netflix)- 'In the city of Gyeongseong in 1945, a group of young people thinking only of their own survival encounter a monster born of human greed and ask themselves what humanity is.'

dark hole (viki)- 'A mysterious black fog from a petrochemical factory's sinkhole turns people into bizarre figures; people who are not infected try to survive in this middle of pandemonium.'

the cursed (multiple)- 'An enthusiastic social issues reporter, fighting against the evil hidden behind an IT conglomerate, meets a teen-age girl who is possessed by a spirit and has special abilities.'

blood (multiple)- 'Dr Park Ji Sang believes in the sanctity of human life, and struggles to treat terminally ill cancer patients and save lives while at the same time being a vampire.'

the ghost detective (viki)- 'In this horror thriller drama, a detective who catches ghosts tries to solve the case of his younger sibling's death with the help of his assistant.'

possessed (netflix)- 'A smart-mouthed detective and a reclusive psychic medium join together to get rid of the ghost of a murder who was executed 20 years ago.'

connect (hulu)- 'A man is kidnapped and one of his eyes removed by a gang of organ hunters; his eyes was transplanted into body of a serial killer; the unwilling donor now has terrible visions as he witnesses terrifying attacks on the residents of Seoul.'

and now just because so many of these only have het romances, I looked up k-dramas with lgbtq representation... (some of these recommendations were from articles from screenrant, movieweb, this subreddit, herzindagi (bl-focused), allkpop)

schoolgirl detectives (viki)- 'Five teenage girls join together to investigate mysterious incidents that occur at their school, as well as help classmate deal with bullying, depression and other crises.'

be melodramatic (netflix, viki)- 'Three 30-year-old best friends, Jinju, Eun-jung and Hanju each pursue different paths in both career and love. Despite life's difficulties, the three friends can always return home at the end of the day and support each other.'

lily fever (available w/subtitles on youtube)- 'The story revolves around the budding relationship between Kim Kyung Ju and Jang Se Rang who meet when Kyung Ju can't find her passport and has to go to her friend's house to try and find it.'

love alarm (netflix)- 'In a world in which an app alerts people if someone in the vicinity likes them, Kim Jojo experiences young love while coping with personal adversities.'

nevertheless (netflix)- 'The story of a romance between a man who is annoyed with relationships but likes to flirt and a woman who wants to date but does not believe in love.' (wlw side couple romance)

#i worked on this while the other half of the screen was zoom (i was just supervising don't worry) and this post is now WAY too long #so i'm stopping here #jackie talks #about me #mine #asks #answered asks #anon asks #kdrama #kdramas #international shows #my recommendations #other media #read more

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multi-lefaiye · 1 year

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one wip, one song

ty so much for the tag @jezifster!!! :D so. i have a lot of wips. quite a lot. so i'm probably not going to cover all of them, but i'll include a song and brief summary with each one :D yahoo!

a modern ghost story - a group of amateur ghost hunters get more than they bargained for when they find definitive proof of the supernatural, but it's far from what any of them expected.

dead girls - penelope scott

god died with wooden bones - 20 years after their mother's disappearance, shiloh rose goes searching for answers, stumbling across a mystery greater than anything they ever could've imagined.

beekeeper - keaton henson

cudaas - angels and demons fall in love and unionize against the gods who created them and have them at odds with each other.

angel of small death and the codeine scene - hozier

bleeding over eden - four years after the death of his husband, ink nikodemos is shocked when said husband walks through the door of his workplace one day, demanding to speak with him.

tell me i'm a wreck - every avenue

for we are both fragile things - over the course of a little over ten years, noah phan and arthur huffman fall in love and ultimately fall apart, causing a ripple effect that will change their lives forever.

soulmate song - carson james argenna

the moon hides its breath - a group of near-strangers go on a roadtrip in the post-apocalypse to try and prevent a murderous cult from potentially causing another apocalypse.

can't go to hell - sin shake sin

in seeking paradise - a year after the death of his friend beatrice in a tragic accident, knives nguyen is determined to find proof that his friend was actually murdered.

irresistible - fall out boy

wild animals - in a world where anthropomorphic animals known as moreaus are commonplace, a feline moreau named pavel is caught up in a war between two organizations with violent, apocalyptic potential.

slow dance with a stranger - danger radio

twelve stories club - four strangers meet one day while attempting to end their lives, though they ultimately all choose not to go through with it and instead strike up a friendship that changes the courses of their lives for the better.

tangerine - nolune

[dead chess wip] - a murder victim is resurrected as a shapeshifting monster, and they decide to go on the warpath hunting down the person who killed them in the first place.

revenge, and a little bit more - unlike pluto

[unnamed second person adventure] - a creature awakens in a dying world with no name, no identity, and no memories, and they go on a journey to find who they truly are.

oh the places you'll go - i fight dragons

blackwell & lomidze - a private investigator goes to investigate the disappearances of several young men, only to be drawn into a supernatural adventure beyond his wildest dreams.

wonderland - sounds like harmony

tagging (with no pressure to any of y'all <3): @skitzo-kero @albatris @wherearetheplants @nicola-writes @funky-writer-man @midnight-and-his-melodiverse aaand anyone else who'd like to give this a shot :D

#multi makes text posts #tag game #writeblr tag game #don't worry about the amount of wips i have btw

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messier-47 · 2 years

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Fanfic snippet that I lost all motivation to complete I'm so mad!

whatever. I'll post it here for y'all to enjoy though I forewarn that the end abruptly cuts off perhaps I'll get back to writing this eventually but rn i wanna have fun with something else.

Tags: Madara POV, Post-Konoha, Izuna-Lives, Murder-Mystery, Supernatural, uneditted, unbeta'd, unfinished

Title: still waters run deep

It was raining.

There was a fist pounding on the front door.

“Hashirama!” Madara called out impatiently, “Hashirama stop kissing your wife and open your goddamn door!”

Giving his friend a moment to answer, finally sensing his friend’s chakra signature migrate from deeper within the home to the front entrance way, Madara repositioned the bundle of scrolls in his arms, covered in an oilskin to keep dry under the summer downpour. On again, off again came down the rainshowers, him having caught a meer moment of respite to get from the Hokage Tower to his friend’s house where Hashirama had strangely hadn’t come in for work.

That wasn’t too odd. There was too much to do in their fledgling village of Konoha, most of the time both Hashirama and Madara spent their days running around to keep it all afloat, about a dozen city building projects currently underway and in need of at least some direction for it all to be completed cohesively. It was a pain in the ass and Madara sometimes thought it’d be better if there should be a singular person to take control of all the infrastructure decisions, especially when both Konoha Founders found themselves adrift at sea with no clue how to navigate the construction of a village that’s suppose to house more people than they were every prepared for.

The front door opened but only for Hashirama’s face to peer out, Madara’s friend oddly keeping himself hidden within his house.

“Hello!” he greeted, “What do you need?”

Rolling his eyes and ignoring his friend’s strangeness (were he and his wife having a moment? Whatever, it’s not like he hadn’t caught the Hokage and his wife before), Madara shoulder checked the door and bullied his way inside Hashirama’s residence. Luckily, it didn’t seem like he’d caught the other in another amorous mood since his clothes were still on and his wife wasn’t in the house judging by her chakra signature (however…what is that?), moving to the kitchen to dump the workload he shared.

“The new terms of the Haruno Trade Deal just came in this morning,” he quickly explained before going to open his friend’s cupboards to pour himself a cup of tea. Mito always had good tea in stock. “The Aburame have finalized the plot of land in which they want their compound, down at the southern lot and the Nara-Yamanaka-Akimichi all have brought up some rather interesting proposals as to how Konoha’s government could be set up. Took the liberty to have Hikaku take some notes which I think we’ll need to have a discussion cause they brought up some points that-”

“Uh, Madara,” Hashirama voiced, something nervous about his tone as he smiled at his long-time friend, “I thank you for bringing this all to me but I’m actually rather busy.”

Which was code for: get the fuck out my house.

Except Mito wasn’t around and there weren’t romantic flower petals in the hall or scented candles, which made the bro-code negligible.

He raised a brow, now actually noticing that something seemed a bit off about his friend. Hashirama was nervous but not distressed. He didn’t want Madara around but there wasn’t…hmmm how should he explain it? Something was troubling Hashirama but wasn’t bringing his concerns to either his best friend or his wife. Something concerning enough to push Madara out, probably wanting to get back to whatever he was dealing with immediately.

“Sure,” Madara said, fixing the cuff of his sleeves, a way for shinobi in deep cover would ask, ‘Status. Threat assessment.’ “The village isn’t gonna build itself. Try stopping by the Tower within the week.”

Hashirama’s eyes went wide upon seeing Madara’s shinobi signs, so startled that his eyes instinctively darted towards the living room.

That was a sure sign that something was off. Hashirama was a better shinobi than that, for his eyes to instantly betray him if the situation was tense enough for such juvenile mistakes.

Madara immediately turned and strode towards the living room, deeming whatever Hashirama wanted to hide not a subject matter that deserves his respect for privacy.

“No, wait! No!” Hashirama cried out, darting around the table to grab hold of him.

Too late.

Coming around the corner, Madara didn’t have to try hard to find what his friend was hiding. Because the person Hashirama was trying to hide stood tall and still in the middle of the room; the door to the outside garden open and like fate did the rain fall harder, like a calling card to the person who stared back at the Uchiha.

Tall.

Pale.

Young, so very young. Madara could hardly believe his eyes how young the other looked.

Wearing a set of broken armor, chipped blue paint barely clinging on now that the rust and dirt had eaten most of it. A familiar fur mantle over a set of thin shoulders, clumps of fur missing and tinted gray from grime.

Happuri missing, leaving nothing about the other’s face hidden behind a vernacular of a fierce warrior.

Not while the other’s skin was so pale that it tinted gray.

His lips a sickly color of blue and Madara would have run to fetch a blanket if foreknowledge didn’t freeze him in his place, staring at this impossible vision of Tobirama Senju standing in Hashirama’s livingroom looking just as he did five years ago.

Hashirama came into his peripheral vision, something raw and so defeated in his expression for him to realize that this was real.

This was not a genjutsu.

Or a hallucination.

“You should have just left,” Hashirama softly said, knowing that Madara wouldn’t be able to leave this alone now that he knew.

Because it’s been five years since Tobirama was last reported as missing.

***

Five years ago, the clans of Senju and Uchiha were at an impasse. There had been no headway to the war their forefathers had forced upon them and peace seemed unlikely.

The stuff of dreams.

Madara couldn’t remember the exact date in which a certain Senju stopped showing up to the Senju-Uchiha skirmishes and battles. There was no way for him to assern when, there was no need for a roll call and not every confrontation had every big name player coming out to the field (hell, even Izuna couldn’t be able to stay at Madara’s side, sometimes missions or other priorities calling him away). All he knew was that one day upon Hashirama and him throwing themselves into the firefight, his then counterpart would not bring up his usual drivel for peace, but an inquiry as to if the Uchiha had reports of Tobirama’s whereabouts.

Back then, he’d given off a simple, truthful answer of no, no Uchiha had seen hide nor hair of the infamous Senju Heir and he thought that was that.

But after the battle, he’d become completely aware that it wasn’t over.

The Senju started swarming out in hoards, combing through every inch of Fire Country from the very borders to the heart of Uchiha land! All in the search for the apparently missing Senju Heir.

Madara had done his own investigation, privately asking his own shinobi for any hints but no one knew anything. Not even Izuna’s spy network could get even a whisper of a singular entity with such recognizable features and a name worth that of a price. No one claimed him for hostage or bargain. No one claimed to have killed him or have discovered a body.

He’d simply vanished off the face of the earth.

Until now and Madara had a sinking suspicion as to what’d happened.

Hashirama too, would have the same conclusion.

Tobirama Senju sat before them both in perfect senza, his expression about as placid as still waters and nothing about him screamed the other was alive.

Cause he wasn’t.

What sat before them was a ghost. A yurei.

And someone who drowned to become one.

It was obvious how the young man died. The spirit was soaked. Literally dripping with water from an unending source. Hashirama had fetched a few towels for the spirit to sit on but the towels were soon drenched.

But…how could Tobirama, one of the strongest and fiercest suiton-natured shinobi Madara had ever come across, drown? It wasn’t unimaginable to have been an accident. However…it didn’t seem much of an accident to see the ring of bruises around the spirit’s throat. Someone had strangled him underwater until he drowned.

#my content #madara #tobirama #snippet #incomplete #just not feeling it #naruto

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rigelmejo · 2 years

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Y'all I finished reading 盗墓笔记1 in chinese, what do I read next?! ToT (below are realistically what I feel up to tackling potentially, but I'll note alternatives for when I'm at that reading level ToT)

寒舍 by 夏灬安兰 (pingxie supernatural au, favored because I've read 2/3 of this before so I know I can read it extensively which is faster... though it's like 300k characters so faster is relative)

盗墓笔记2 (upside? It's like 40-50k so short, and I'll probably start picking at this as the alternative reading choice to go back and forth with something else. On the flip side, I just read the first book and would prefer learning some more varied vocab right now)

云村笔记 (yuncun village dmbj story, very slice of life iron triangle living in a village, upside its that slice of life adult vocab I lack and its fairly easy reading, downside its maybe also better as an alternative I switch to when tired of Main Reading material)

苍兰诀 (Love Between Fairy and Devil novel, upside I do think I can handle reading this alongside the audiobook which could be cool, and some xianxia vocab. However it is a bit more challenging since it's xianxia)

琉璃 (Love and Redemption novel. Upside is I was listening to this audiobook today, and like canglanjue I think I could just listen along to audiobook with this. Same challenges/benefits: I learn more xianxia vocabulary but it's more of a slog. It's longer than canglanjue which is Intimidating as I've only finished a 124k characters story so far, nothing longer.)

撒野 (upside: big potential increase in daily life vocab, I can also read this extensively making reading faster. Downside is it is a LONG novel and I'm not sure modern romance teen setting is something I can focus on consistently right now to actually make much progress... it's not one of my fave genres... also the chapters are like 4k characters a piece, quite long.)

镇魂 (upside? Could just read along with audiobook. Downside? It's quite long, like 撒野, and I'm a bit scared to tackle something much longer than 100k... I want to like... work my way up in novel size I can handle... I've finished 20 chapters of 镇魂 multiple times but attention burns out about that far in. Also i love this story so me not knowing every word perfectly may demotivate me, causing me not to finish Again, and ultimately the goal right now is just to read a LOT so... that would not be ideal).

SCI (I do like a good murder mystery, and this series meets several criteria: I can handle reading this author right now without much difficulty, it's in case format so I could read a section then stop for another novel and come back later - dmbj also has this benefit - and I could pick up some modern day and crime novel words, which woulsd benefit me trying to read 默读 and 破云 later. In addition, this author ErYa also has another novel in a different time period, which I'm considering for picking up some vocabulary in that setting. So anything by ErYa is up for potential reading).

成化十四年 (novel Sleuth of Ming Dynasty is based on. A candidate because surprisingly this is a bit easier for me to read than 天涯客 - and 天涯客 is one of the priest novels I can tackle extensive reading right now - and I am interested in reading the story. I could pick up setting vocabulary, some case vocabulary, and i imagine it's somewhat split by cases which may help with reading it in chunks... so yes any cases/arcs structure novels will be easier to read since I don't have to commit to reading a full novel in one go, but instead just one section at a time)

???

#rant #reading

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phantom-of-the-ruckus · 2 years

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The Mist

Okie doie, I finally found my archives with my old HS stuff. Here is one that I wrote last year in April. This was for my English IIII Honors class. I have one from 2020 based on another theme.

The assignment was based on doing something related to nature, so I decided to write a story with a certain type of ending.

Hope y'all enjoy it

TW: for implications/mentioned murder, implications of staking, possibility of the supernatural and stuff

The Mist

The sky was dark, it almost looked like it was a shade of black instead of a deep dark blue. It wasn’t a completely dark morning, the streetlamps illuminated the roads and the cars’ light was visible through the mist. It wasn’t exactly a lovely sight in the very early and dreadfully cold morning during late autumn. Everything was wet and humid, the frosty air brought down shivers on Shannon’s back, and somehow the worst part of the view was how terrible the trees look among the mist. They looked like ugly black smooches under a poor layer of white paint as if someone tried to hide them but gave up halfway in an early morning painting. It was an unpleasant sight.

It was unpleasant but not depressing. The sight wasn’t the prettiest to look at it, but it wasn’t the most depressive view of the neighborhood someone could ever find. It was more of a grim sight. A grim early morning on an atrocious bleak weather. So atrocious that it was best to stop her midway of heading out to work and return to her home to get the warmest winter coat she owned before continuing with her journey. She may probably never use it on her way back home after work, but she outright refused to walk her way to work in deadly cold weather in a misty early morning.

Once the old giant brown coat was on, the house was well locked, and the keys in her pocket, Shannon walked her way to work. She kept her sight straight, focusing on how the mist dissolved as she walked quietly. There wasn’t much to look at. There were 3 or 2 cars passing down the roads at a high speed, but the roads were usually empty. Sometimes she could see other civilians walking from far away, but nobody was around. Shannon thought she was all by herself before some red lights caught her attention. They belong to an average-looking car standing still across the road Shannon was walking by. It was strange to see a car standing still in such an early morning. Perhaps someone had to run some errands, or maybe someone was just setting their GPS. In either situation, it wasn’t her concern, although that didn’t stop her from increasing her pace when she heard a car door closing and some steps. The driver was probably doing something, she reasoned, there was probably nothing to be paranoid about...was there?

No. Absolutely no, she told herself. The routine has been the same for about 2 years and, she would notice if something was off. Emergencies could occur at any time and everywhere in the world. The driver or whoever was in the car had to do something. There was no need to be paranoid or afraid. There were no other sounds than the wind, the splashing of water drops, and the steps she took. Almost no one was outside and the road was almost dead silent. There was a little feeling of something behind her in the distance, but it could be another car. Shannon stop, just for safety, turned around, and waited to see what was approaching.

At first, it was some sort of black blob in the far distance, then the figure changed into a human form as it came closer, finally, she was seeing a mysterious figure on a large black coat walking in her direction. The most reasonable thought was that the person coincidentally going in the same direction as her, so there was absolutely no need to be afraid. Many strangers walked down the same direction as her before. Nothing out of the ordinary, so it was best to ignore all the alarms going into her head that something was not right.

“Don’t be foolish.” She thought to herself as she continued to walk. “You probably had a terrible night’s sleep, or that documentary about serial killers you watched last week is probably causing you not to think properly. They’re not following you. Why would they have a reason to do that?” That eased her fear, but didn’t stop her from increasing the rate of her speed just to be safe.

As the minutes passed by as the cold breeze increased and the mist dissolved in every step she took, the fear was almost completely gone. There was still that gut feeling that something wasn’t right, but what are the odds that someone was stalking her? Yes, she could feel a pair of eyes staring straight at her, but what other thing the person could look at? The sun wasn’t risen yet, everything looked so grim, and the roads were almost empty, she couldn’t blame them if they thought keeping their sight straight, even if that crept her out a little. The person would turn eventually, Shannon reasoned, then she will be walking alone by herself again.

Once the first turn arrived, she noticed that the stranger made the same exact turn. It was an odd coincidence, but it was just a simple turn, they weren’t following her...right? Just to prove herself wrong, Shannon decided to take another turn, the stranger followed. Fear and paranoia were rising once again. That couldn’t be a coincidence, right? What were the odds of someone walking the same path as a person? What were the odds of a mysterious stranger in black possibly following a young woman?

“They must make another turn,” She thought to herself casually increasing the pace. Her hand held her phone tight in her coat pocket. “They aren’t stalking you, you’re just being paranoid. You just need to make another turn, they would turn around eventually. There is no reason to be paranoid.” She made another turn, the stranger followed once again.

This was becoming far beyond a little coincidence. Every turn she made the stranger followed the same exact turn. As far as she knew, she was the only person to arrive the earliest to her work, there were no new employees as far as she was concerned. What could be another reason for the stranger to follow her path? Was there an actual logical reason to not think she was being stalked? Shannon increased her speed and held her keys tight. The stranger seemed to increase their speed or so it seemed. Shannon was too afraid to know if they were increasing their speed to reach her.

“Just a few more blocks, and you’ll reach the main building.” Shannon thought to herself increasing her pace as much as she was able. If she ran, the stranger might run after her, she didn’t wish to be chased down before she could reach to her work.

She could hear some steps getting closer. In a bold move, she turned around. A pair of blue eyes stared at her as the figure walk among the mist. It was a man, an old man. There was something off with his expression, but she couldn’t figure out what it was because she turned right away when she saw those eyes. Pale blue eyes staring at her soul as something inside her kept yelling something was completely off.

The stranger seemed to be getting closer and closer at each step. Taking the most foolish decision she could ever be made, she down what little blocks were left. She could hear the strange old man in black following, but she could figure if he was running after her. It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter at all, she was going to enter that main building and stay until the sunrise or someone arrived. Nearly tripping when she made the last final turn, Shannon sprinted to the main entrance of the building and clumsy locked herself inside. The stranger walked to the building and stop. It seemed that he was looking for someone. A few minutes passed before the stranger walked away.

Shannon waited a few minutes to recompose herself and considered dialing 911. It was best to stay quiet, the stranger could be off somewhere searching for a way in. She checked the cameras, everything was empty. Did the stranger left? Was he really after her? Was he hiding? There was only one way to find out, and it was the most dangerous and foolish option she could ever think. She turned on the lights and the flashlight of her before heading out with her keys in a defensive position. She stood close to the walls and constantly looked both sides.

“Is anyone there?” Shannon cried with a creaky voice. “Where ever you are, you better get out, or I’ll call the cops.”

There was only silence and mist.

“Hello?” She cried once more moving her phone around. “Is anyone there?”

It seemed that the stranger left for good. Shannon let out a sigh of relief before entering back to her building to start working. Maybe the man was some sort of creepy homeless guy. The worst possibility if he was some sort of ghost walking down the streets all by himself, or perhaps a vulgar meant to steal something from her. Either way, the stranger was gone and that was what mattered.

Sunrise came a few hours later along with other co-workers. Shannon continued her day as usual with paperwork, gossips, asking if someone had seen a strange old man walking on an early misty morning and receiving some shrugs and be careful next time. Eventually, her shift ended, and she headed back home with a little smile as she saw a clear busy street filled with people and cars passing by.

After hanging her large old brown coat and turning on the news in her TV, Shannon allowed herself a moment to relax. Her ease began to deteriorate when she heard the news anchors talked about a terrifying event: An unidentified old man in black was found dead of the streets close to where she worked. The police found a black coat on the scene which seemed to be the victim’s, although the main suspect wore black as well. According to the police, the victim probably died around an early misty morning.

Shannon’s stomach revolved as she heard the story.

Could be the strange old man be the victim seeking for help?

Could he be the suspect searching for a victim?

Could he be a normal civilian running an errand?

The answer may never come, and simply lie hidden in that misty cold early morning in late autumn.

The end.

Author's note: You can take the ending as whatever you like, this actually my shortest story so far (4 pages on my word) I got that ghost story I told @dolly-royal about I might post it as well but I'll add a note explaining some things.

Tell me if you like it or hate it. Glad to share with ya

#original writitng #deedz writes #my fictional story #fiction #mystery #tw: mentions of murder #tw: implied murder #tw: implied stalking #open ending

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thebigoblin · 3 years

Text

Sterek Fic Recs Part 3

[You can find the first two lists here: Fluffy Sterek Recs & Sterek Fic Recs. Also here's a special fic, check it out]

First off, thank you all for a 100 followers!! As of September 7, 2021 you've made me feel really, really good about my obsession with two oblivious idiots (with sprinkles of the hale pack and other fandoms), and this is my way of thanking you ♥️

If you're on PC, you can see that there is a page dedicated solely to fic recs, which caters to other ships & fandoms too. So don't feel left out if you're looking for something other than Sterek!

Without further ado, let's get to it then!

an awful curse

Isaac is asleep in a chair. The angle of his neck makes Derek wince in sympathy.

"Isaac," Derek says.

Isaac snaps awake immediately.

"You're-"

"Where's Stiles?"

"Stiles?" Isaac asks.

Jesus. It's not like they know more than one.

AU - Canon Divergence | 6.3k | By blinkiesays

Throw Away The Key

Stiles knew it was stupid to go to the hunters’ headquarters all by himself, so when he finds himself caught, he can really only blame himself.

It shouldn't surprise Stiles when the situation quickly goes from bad to worse as the hunters throw him to a feral werewolf waiting to tear him apart.

Sucks that it's Derek, though.

AU - Canon Divergence | 5.9k | By mommymuffin

Whatever Happened Last Night, Why Did Glitter Have to Be Involved?

Derek rolled out of bed in search of his phone - quickly finding it in the pair of jeans that had evidently been tossed aside haphazardly on the way to the bed. Seeing the pants sparked flashes of memories - wolfsbane-laced alcohol, loud music, multicolored lights.

Peter’s new supernatural-friendly club - the pack had gone to the opening night party.

He unlocked his phone and opened the pack group chat, which Erica had affectionately named ‘Moon Sluts’.

>>Derek: What the fuck happened last night

[or: Derek wakes up with three things on his mind: he feels like he was punched by a troll, his mate is missing, and there's glitter covering his bed. Oh, and the pack group chat is mildly helpful]

Prompt #159 - “Also, my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall.”

Crack Vibes | 1.2k | By ash_mcj

Good to Eat

So if Stiles married Derek Hale, he could become Jewish too? Perfect. It was settled. Stiles gleefully shoveled a forkful of cheesy shells into his mouth.

"Uh oh. I know that look.” Claudia shook her head.

"Don’t worry, Mom, ” Stiles said, reaching for his plastic Batman cup.

"I’ve got a plan.”

"Good luck, Derek Hale,” his mother muttered.

Rude.

AU - Childhood Friends | 1.7k | By Jmeelee

Murder Brows and Avoidance Tactics

Derek gets the wrong end of the stick.

Written for prompt: "You're jealous, aren't you?"

AU - Everybody Lives | 2k | By Dragonink13

Double Vision (only registered users can read this one)

"So what caused my hearing and sense of smell to dull?"

Deaton's brow furrowed, all amusement vanishing from his face. "What do you mean?"

Derek snapped, letting loose all of his anger and fear at the man before him. "I mean I can't hear your heartbeat or the cars down below or the birds in the attic! I can't smell the flowers in Mrs. Everett's apartment, I can't smell the rotting burger in the fridge that Isaac left in there a month ago, I can't smell or hear anything like I normally can!" Deaton mouth was pressed into a thin line. "Can you explain that?!"

Tumblr Prompt: Derek jealous of himself.

AU - Everyone Lives | 6.1k | By Novkat21

Kiss?

Derek likes kissing Stiles, honestly he does. Until he doesn't.

Fluff | 3.6k | By clotpolesonly

Oblivious Misadventures, and Other Such Tales

Going to college was exciting and new, a chance for new friends and a fresh start, and the best part was, there was a supernatural fraternity on campus, meaning Scott finally had the freedom to be himself.

Then he met the resident human who came with a stalker alpha. What was the point of a supernatural fraternity if he still had to pretend to be human. And seriously, did Stiles ever fall asleep somewhere normal?

(aka - Five TImes Scott Found Derek and Stiles Sleeping, and the One Time He Didn't)

AU, Supernatural is real but not known by everyone, Alive Hale Family | 11.2k | By Little Spoon

Call Me (Cliché)

When the sheriff's sister ends up in a wheelchair for the duration of summer, Stiles' dreams of three months full of pack bonding, late-night video games and bro-time with Scott come crashing down. He's temporarily relocated to Redford, a three hour drive away, and he can already tell he won't be getting many visitors.

Sure the pack will forget about him while he's gone, Stiles is determined to make the most of his summer of isolation, training his body and mind - and his magic - so he can come back with a bang, and maybe catch a certain Sourwolf's eye.

Then Derek shows up at his window one night with a flimsy excuse about needing research done. Suddenly, his summer away is looking a whole lot more interesting.

AU - Canon Divergence | 84.6k | By Orphan_Account aka the author has dissociated themselves from the fic

Shiver

Stiles has really, really cold hands. Luckily, Derek knows just what to do about that.

Established Relationship | 1.7k | By canistakahari

Derek Hale's Possible Heart

An anon sent me a sterek prompt for Laura teasing Derek and Stiles joining in, then somehow sharing their feelings for each other in the mess of things.

AU - Canon Divergence | 4.3k | By loserchildhotpants

What's a Secret Identity?

Stiles sipped at a mug of coffee, absently watching the news play in the break room. Because of course a news station couldn't play anything other than its own content, even in the one part of the office that was supposed to be a safe space from work. His interview with Superman was making a rerun and Stiles glanced at Derek before commenting absently, “I’d totally let Superman fuck me.”

Derek, who had been in the middle of a swig of coffee, choked violently, “That’s not something I needed to know at nine in the morning, Stiles.”

Stiles raised an eyebrow. “What time would you prefer I tell you about all of the things I would let Superman do to my body?”

AU, Derek is Superman | 7k | By Chrystie, imabignerd and kate882

i see that you've come so far [just like them old stars]

But her big brother’s unwillingness to touch anyone, like he thinks he doesn’t deserve it isn’t the only thing she notices. She also notices how Stiles doesn’t touch him.

Everyone reaches for Derek in some form or another, but Stiles- Stiles is something different altogether because he reaches for Derek but he never makes contact.

He’ll be trying to shimmy past Derek and instead of putting a hand on his arm like most of them do, he’ll reach out with a hand and stop it scant centimeters away from Derek’s skin.

Or they’ll be walking alongside each other and Stiles will hover a hand on Derek’s lower back.

It’s both fascinating and tragic to watch, like NASA lost control of one of their robots and instead of it landing on the moon it’s fated to gravitate around it.

AU - Canon Divergence | 2.3k | By crossroadswrite

Déjà Vu

There’s a shop in Beacon Hills that no one knows anything about except that the mysterious proprietor, a witch in whispered circles, knows what you need before you do and that the things given are always just what you need.

Derek, lost after a breakup, heads into the shop to see if he can find something to help him forget his ex. The witch gives him a potion to drink, and when Derek wakes up, he finds he’s sixteen again and there’s a new student at his school, Stiles Stilinski.

Everything is familiar and yet not, and Derek finds he’s strangely drawn to Stiles in a way that is entirely supernatural.

AU, Supernatural is Real | 8.8k | By gremlins-came-and-got-me and StaciNadia

Start Small, Like Oak Trees

The months following Allison's death have passed Stiles by in a haze of monotony. He sleepwalks through days that seem to lose their color, an unwilling passenger in a body he no longer trusts. Eventually, he thinks, he'll just fade away. He isn't sure anyone would notice. Then, during a spur of the moment grocery run, he stumbles upon Derek Hale attempting to console a lost child, and for the first time in recent memory the world doesn't seem so awful.

He's not sure what he'd been expecting when he eventually convinces Derek to move into the Stilinski's spare bedroom, but a newfound passion for weeding and topsoil certainly isn't it.

AU - Canon Divergence | 24.2k | By SmallBirds

Undercover K9

As it usually goes, Derek acts before he thinks. This time he has a good reason, though-it's all Stiles' fault. Mostly.

Or, that time when Derek volunteered to spend all his spare time as a wolf with the Beacon Hills Sheriff's Office K9 Unit, just to protect Stiles' dumb ass.

Future Fic | 17.9k | By Cobrilee

Rose Colored Glasses

“Obviou—um, what? Derek?” Stiles managed. “What? You’re not colorblind. You’re colorblind?”

“Yes.” Derek said gruffly. “And?”

“And? What do you mean and? You can’t see colors?” Stiles demanded, thrown. “Does it—what kind is it? Red-green? Blue-yellow? Why doesn’t—oh my god, is this why your entire freaking wardrobe was completely black until like two years ago? Oh my god!”

“There’s nothing wrong with having a favorite color, Stiles.”

Established Relationship | 2.2k | By SassyStarboard

1,460 Days (gotta clean my slate)

Two years after Scott becomes Alpha and Derek gives it up for Cora, Stiles gets hurt during a fight and ends up in a coma for two weeks. According to the nurse, a guy has been visiting him every day and, as much as he wishes it were Derek, it sounds a lot like Scott. Except he and Scott aren't even friends anymore.

AU - Canon Divergence | 10k | By army_of_angels

This is it for now. Happy reading y'all! ♥️

#sterek #my sterek fic recs #sterek fic recs #derek hale #stiles stilinski

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midwrites · 3 years

Note

1, 15, and 20 for the writers asks , please :)

Thanks so much for asking!! <33 1. Tell us about your current project(s) – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it? My WIP folder currently holds -checks- over 20 word docs. So Imma go over the projects that I currently consider priorities aka stuff I can't stop thinking about on a daily/weekly basis and thus I Must Write at some point: -Kalluzeb post Zero Hour one-shot: if you are into Star Wars: Rebels this is self-explanatory. -A multichaptered ADorCuBull fic: The three of them get lost in the desert after the Inquisition's incurssion into the temple of Dumat and they have to bond to survive. Angst and badly hidden pining ensues. -Post-Trespasser bad end IronLion: Basically, what would have happened if Mia Rutherford commisioned Bull to find his brother--who was forced to take lyrium again by the Inquisitor--before Scout Harding does in the prologue. Titanic quantities of angst, ships loaded with it--but also some slow burn and very required hurt/comfort. -Werewolf AU 2: The Sequel, Electric Boogaloo: What it says in the tin but Mid that implies that the first part is already written . I accidentally loaded this one with a bunch of supernatural murder mystery elements, as I was playing Alan Wake and watching Wayward Pines while plotting it. It's a bit of a turn from the first one, but I hope that if I end up writing it those who enjoyed the prequel have a good time with it too. -IronLion Roadtrip!AU: If you have been following me for a while here you know what this one's about. It's one of those projects I've been meaning to work on but I feel so unprepared and unskilled to write it as I want to write it. Inevitably it will get done one of these days, because I have a very clear outline for it and I'd rather die than leave it unwritten. I think this is the longest fic I've planned in a while, as my initial plan was for it to be 50k long, but it would probably get longer. 15. Which is harder: titles or summaries (or tags)? Unless a miracle happens and I've managed to come up with one while writing or editing because the text just asks for it, titles. Titles>summaries>tags.

20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?) Oh, this is a hard one, specially because it's been a really long time since I wrote anything long enought for me to ponder on stuff like this. Don't get me wrong, if you've read my stuff y'all already know that I love my shitty metaphors like the next guy, but I'm not aware of anything that I have included on stuff that somebody hasn't noticed in the comments or my beta while reading... Anywho, as no one has read this one yet, I'll say that I really enjoyed writing a certain scene in the Werewolf!AU because even if it seems pretty straightforward at first, I had to get a lot of lying in there from a non-POV character to another who is not very easily fooled, and as it's something that's not gonna pay off until the second part is done, I'm sitting here clutching my knees like that one meme Ask me stuff!

#ask game #-stares at the roadtrip!au- soon my child soon #honestly I'd love to at least get the prologue finished this summer #but eh #it's quite possible that one of those fics will get done by the end of the year #maybe two if I'm lucky and my brain doesn't fuck me over #SO FEEL EXCITED!!I GUESS #this is probably RIDDLED with typos #it's 2:30 am and I should be: sleeping

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tippitv · 4 years

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Supernatural recap: 15.04 “Atomic Monsters”

Howdy, recap readers! It's going to be a short one this week as I'm currently battling a cold that's evolved into an ear infection that is currently making me about as well-balanced as a baby giraffe on ice skates. I considered skipping this episode entirely but there were things I really wanted to cover about it.

Namely, there's this opening scene in the bunker. Everything is lit red like a security system has been breached. Indeed, the place is swarming with monsters of some kind. Demons? Yes. Demons. Dean is coolly going about killing them in ballet-like slow motion that speeds back up for the fatal blows.

You can tell at once from the directorial choices that things aren't quite right. The aforementioned lighting is one sign. The influx of demons is another. Then there's Dean's very full beard and imperfect hair. I mean, his hair IS perfect because there's nothing he could do to make it ugly. But it's not its usual texture-puttied self. It's messy and dry, down on his forehead. Dean has obviously not had time to devote to it. All he's got is genetics. The infinity scarf he's sporting is also some kind of indicator of some kind of thing. Maybe it's a sign that he's now some kind of sexy post-apocalyptic lumberjack assassin.

Anyway, what I'm saying is that Ackles, who directed this episode, injected more creativity than regular directors tend to. Which, you know, I get it. Not every episode is going to be innovative. They have a limited schedule and budget. But it does get to a point where many scenes in many episodes feel as if they don't need directors at all. Just have everyone sit down and talk or walk from point A to point B and talk. It gets to be a bit paint-by-numbers so it's nice to have an injection of someone's energy and point of view who's not one of the four or five main directors.

Ah, here's the part where I momentarily lost my shit.

Dean offs a bunch of demons and then pauses when he finds BENNY THE MUTHAFUCKIN FRIENDLY VAMPIRE critically wounded. I've made no secret of the fact that Benny's one of my favorite short-term characters. He had a fantastic intro and a tragic send-off that came too soon.

He dies again (NOOOO) after telling Dean once more, "See you on the other side, brother."

Dean resumes stalking around the bunker in search of the mysterious enemy who turns out to be Sam. Sam's hair is especially bouffant now, which I think is one of the usual indicators of his state of evilness.

And indeed he has returned to imbibing demon blood for reasons we're not yet privy to. We know from their chat that he killed Bobby and Jody (NOOOO) because they got in the way of his doing something. Dean tries to talk some sense into him but Sam's eyes go black and he telekinetically breaks his bro's neck.

In the present day, a non-demonic Sam wakes up with a start. He doesn't tell Dean which means at some point we're going to get an angry confrontation about why Sam didn't mention sooner that something was wrong.

Also, I don't know if Sam is supposed to be a full vegetarian these days but at the least he doesn't eat meat-based bacon anymore, so Dean lying about the kind of bacon he's been buying is a dick move. Also, we're super late in the timeline for Dean's masculinity to still be so fragile. Stop acting like a bite of soybean is going to make your testicles detach from your body and Plinko their way down your pants legs.

Okay so the A-plot is this: Sam and Dean investigate a high school cheerleader's death. It's immediately apparent that the parents of some lacrosse boy are involved because they have that standard "we're vaguely familiar Canadian actors whose characters get more attention than non-villains would warrant" introduction. Now, in a logical world, Sam and Dean would immediately peg them for murderers or at least accomplices, because they've seen this pattern play out many times, but then the A-plot would be over. Long story short: Their son got turned into a vampire but they want him to have a normal life where they live vicariously through his lacrosse successes at Yale. The kid's less of a monster than his parents, and volunteers himself for a beheading. It's a little bit sad but we spent more time on misdirection than getting to know him. It was too late to cure him but Dean could've mentioned his pal Benny who gave up killing. Then Sam could've made an uncomfortable face that communicated "THIS IS RELEVANT TO MY VISION BUT I CAN'T SAY ANYTHING."

Noteworthy is the use of Jensen Ackles's own song "Sounds of Someday" over the ending of this plot. He has a lovely singing voice and it's different enough from his Dean speaking voice (no gargling with gravel here) that I'm not sure I'd notice if I were just a casual viewer.

Now for the B-plot which is actually the more important plot to the season: the return of Supernatural fangirl Becky.

As with probably many of you, my first reaction was to shudder because eight years wasn't enough for me to forgive and forget the utter grossness of "Time for a Wedding!" That one's right up there with the manwitch dog episode for grossness with me. But Becky's gotten herself sorted out and is disgusted by her own actions towards Sam back then, so I'm kind of glad she showed up.

Who else shows up? Chuck Almighty. In need of an ego boost, he intrudes upon Becky's life. She's got herself a handsome husband and cute kids now, and her own Etsy store selling handcrafted Supernatural merch, but she feels a grain of pity for her old boyfriend. Thinking he's an abandoned prophet, she encourages him to get back to writing, but has a little bit of concrit for his new Sam and Dean fluff fic.

Y'all ever had a fic writer who said they wanted a beta reader but then got super mad at even the most helpful advice? Yeah, that's Chuck.

So he starts writing another story. This one is tortured and dark and painful. I think it's basically supposed to be Sam's dream from the opening. But I think the show fundamentally misunderstands something about fans and writing here. Becky says she hates the story because it's dark and hopeless. That's not necessarily why fans hate certain endings. A dark seemingly hopeless ending can feed a fandom for decades and spawn a million fics. But one that isn't earned? One that doesn't feel like a natural outcome of what came before? That's the stuff of shit heaps. That's the stuff people hate.

In writing, a gut punch is good. A sucker punch is bad.

Chuck finally reveals to Becky that he's God by disappearing her husband, her kids, and eventually her, too. Now he's just gonna squat in her house and use her computer. Ex-boyfriends are the worst, amirite?

So that's it for this week. Please reblog if you enjoyed this recap and visit my virtual tip jar if you can: https://ko-fi.com/A4017DA

I'm consistently broke and could use a supply of Nyquil and/or ice skates.

#supernatural #spn recaps #my recaps #atomic monsters #tippitv

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crashdevlin · 6 years

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Something More- Part Four

Author’s Note: *THERE IS NO WIFE-HATE HERE! I <3 Danneel Ackles. (it’s completely understandable how she acts)* This is a sequel to Open. READ THAT FIRST! Something More Masterlist

Summary: Reader is a no-name actor who has been lucky enough to land a role on her favorite show and a part in an anthology of Marvel Cinematic Shorts. Her star is on the rise, but the man who’s made her his mistress isn’t the only one noticing it.

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader, Tom Hiddleston x Reader

Story Warnings: Open Marriage, mistress, breakups, angst, anger, jealousy, things get REALLY bad between Jensen and y/n…

Chapter Warnings: 18+ HERE BE SEX, DON’T READ IF YOU’RE A YOUNG’UN!!! fingering, Dom/Sub relationship, Tom is Dom, slight choking, controlling behavior (cause Tom is Dom), mentions of depression and depressive drinking,

The drive was much easier with Tom in the car, ratty black tee and threadbare jeans making him look ever so comfortable in the passenger seat. We spent the entire ride talking about family, about what he needed to expect from mine, from Connie, from Nova. Then we sang along with my Spotify playlist. Then his.

We pulled into the driveway of my parents’ house and I took a deep breath. “Are you all right?”

I bit my lip and nodded. “It's just… you know, last time I brought a guy home, it was Nate… and they hated him from the get.”

“Are you afraid they're going to hate me?”

“I'm sure they won't, but if they did… I would have to listen to them. Because Nate was such a disaster, right, that I could have avoided if I had just listened to them.”

“But Nate and Nova forced growth in you, catalyzed change. As did Jensen.”

I looked down. I hadn't seen Jensen, and had tried to keep him from my mind, since I dropped his key off at the set. At set was determined to be the safest place to see him. He'd taken the key without a word and I'd just nodded as I turned and walked away.

“Don't mention him to them. None of them know what was going on. Well, my mom accused me of having an emotional affair with him, because she noticed he called me every night after he got done shooting… which I guess isn’t completely wrong based on how he acted after I met you… but according to them, I haven’t had anybody since Nate, so…” I pushed the car door open and stepped out, Tom following as I walked toward the door, which slung open to reveal Nova. “Supernova!” I yelled, dropping to my knees so that she could run to me and jump into my arms.

“Mommy!” She screamed, knocking me over with the force of her jump. “I missed you!”

“Oh, I missed you, too, baby!” I stood, my arms wrapped around her, and turned to Tom. “Nova, this is Mommy's friend, Tom. Remember how I told you about him?”

“Yeah, he's your boyfriend.” Nova said, forcing a chuckle from Tom.

“She's very smart.”

“Yeah, well, I was a genius before I got dumbed down by laziness and depression. I mentioned I was reading and understanding Shakespeare at her age, right?”

“Well, Midsummer Night's Dream isn't exactly that hard to follow, is it?”

“Hey! Don't make me dump you when you came all this way to meet my parents.” I joked, before grabbing his hand and pulling him into the house. “Hey, y'all, I'm home!”

“Y/n!” My mom greeted, hugging me and Nova at the same time.

“This is Tom.” I reached up and patted his shoulder.

“Mrs. Y/l/n, it's an unabashed pleasure to meet you. Your daughter is a shining light of intelligence and beauty.”

The moment my mother fell in love with Tom was showcased by her blush. Okay, so nothing to worry about. “You really go for the tall ones, don't'cha?” My dad said as he entered the living room.

“Be nice. At least this one's a gentleman.” Mom scolded.

“In the streets, anyway.” I muttered, under my breath.

“So, you met on set?” My mom asked, ushering Tom to sit on the couch.

“You know we did.” I rolled my eyes. “Go ahead, Tom. You like telling this story so much.”

“Shall I alter it for your parents’ benefit?”

“Nah. They know I’m a dirty old woman. I’m sure they’d believe you if you told them I gave it up on the second date.” I said, walking up the stairs with Nova on my hip.

“I assumed that was something unique to our relationship.” I heard Tom muse.

“Oh, definitely. She’s generally just a dirty old lady in her writings.” My dad responded. I dropped Nova to her feet on the top step and ran back down to the living room.

“Tom doesn’t need to know about that, yet!”

Tom smiled up at me. “Your fanfictions? I know about them. Someone sent a link to your story about Loki to me the night I sang with you.”

“And you still want me? You don’t think I’m a weirdo?”

“Incredibly articulate and grammatically pleasing with a good grasp on the characterizations of Loki and Thor… I quite enjoyed it.”

I gaped at him for a minute. “You… you read it? Nobody else ever… I mean, you liked it?”

“It was very good. You seem incredibly concerned with maintaining the canon of the MCU while bringing in just enough information from the comic books to flesh out the story and remedy the perceived faults in the timeline.”

“I… thank you, Tom. That means a lot.”

“I’d love to read more of your writing sometime.” His eyes sparkled at me from across the room and I laughed, loudly.

“Yeah, that’s not gonna happen. Most of my stuff is Supernatural and a lot of it is reader-inserts for female readers, so…”

“You could let him read the first five chapters of your murder mystery.” Dad suggested.

“Oh, a murder mystery? Do you have it readily available?” Tom asked.

I blushed. “I guess I can get it for you.”

He followed me up to my bedroom and shut the door behind him. He smiled as he looked around the walls. “Well, the decor hasn’t been updated in quite a while, has it?”

“You know I didn’t expect to have to come back to live with my parents. The divorce just… took away my options. Didn’t want to spring for new decor when I couldn’t even afford my own place.” I pointed at the Green Day posters. “And Green Day rocks, so fuck you.”

He chuckled, his trademark ‘he-he-he’, eyes roaming down my body. He reached behind him and locked the door. “If you insist.” He grabbed my shoulders and pushed me backward onto my king bed, the one piece of furniture I fought to keep in the divorce. It was just a box spring and a mattress settled on the ground. When I was fat, I hated the sound of a bed frame groaning under my weight and I just never bought one after I lost the weight.

“Tom, we can’t.”

“Of course we can. The door’s locked. I can be quiet. Can’t you?”

“Yeah, but my parents are right downstairs and they, literally, just met you. Is this the first impression you want to give them?” I whispered as he pushed me onto the bed and covered my body with his.

“I’d think they’d want you with someone who can take care of all of your needs.” He responded, running his hands down my sides. “Besides, you said they know you're a dirty woman.”

“Yeah, but that's more metaph-fuck!” I whispered as his hand slipped into the front of my pants, long fingers easily finding and rubbing at my clit.

“I know you can be quieter than that, darling.” He whispered in my ear before starting to nibble and suck at my neck. “You don't really want me to stop, do you?”

“Yes… no.” I buried my hand in his hair and held him at the spot on my neck he usually doesn't give enough time to. “Fuck, right there.” He pulled my jeans down my legs, sliding down my body with them, biting at the inside of my thigh as he went. As I tried to hold in my moans, my eyes fell on another one of my posters: one with three men and ‘Join The Hunt’ on it. “Tom, stop.” I pulled his hair and pointed at the poster. “Jensen’s watching me.”

Tom scoffed and stood, ripping the poster from the wall. “Shouldn’t still have your ex-lover on your wall, anyway.” He grumbled at me since I was obviously offended by his treatment of my stuff.

“Yeah, but I’ve had that poster for years and you just-”

“Quiet.” He demanded, his voice low and resolute as his fingers hooked in my underwear and he pulled them down.

“Bossy.” I responded, breathlessly, as he sunk two fingers into me with no fanfare.

As he started to work his fingers in and out of me, he moved up my body and wrapped the fingers of his left hand around my neck, just hard enough to put pressure but not enough to hinder my breathing. “Sometimes, y/n, you seem like you need to be told what to do. I’m just giving you what you need.”

“Tom, I-”

His hand tightened, just slightly. “I said, ‘quiet’.” His voice made me shiver.

I nodded. I wasn’t sure what else to do. Sure, Tom was always passionate, especially in bed, and he’d always kind of controlled the situation, but this was different. This was Tom easing us into a Dom/sub relationship, which wasn’t something I’d ever wanted.

“If you’re good, y/n, if you keep quiet… I’ll let you cum. Do you want to cum?” He asked, after he’d been working me for about ten minutes. I nodded. “Words, darling. You can speak when I ask something of you.”

“Please.” I whined, and it kind of amazed me that I fell into that role so easily, following directions and eager to please.

He chuckled, letting his thumb just barely sweep across my clit. “‘Please’, what?”

“Please, make me cum.”

“Add a ‘sir’ to that sentence for good measure, Dear.”

“Please, make me cum, sir.” I breathed out.

“Go on, then.” He pressed his thumb down firmly and I saw stars. My body went rigid and I twitched and spasmed around his fingers, but I didn’t make noise. I was quiet. “Well, look. She doesn’t like being told what to do, but she’s very good at following directions. Get dressed. I’m going to wash my hands.”

I was leaning against the wall next to the door when he exited the bathroom. “What the hell was that?” I whispered.

“Something I thought we’d both enjoy. I was right, wasn’t I?”

“You can’t just spring Dom shit on a woman. What if I was a Dom?”

He chuckled. “You’re not.”

“That’s rude. I could be.”

“I’ll give it to you that you might be a switch if the circumstances were right, but you aren’t Dom, darling.” He cupped my cheek and smiled. “You, my dear, sweet y/n, were made to kneel.”

“Don’t Loki at me, you jerk.”

“Why not?” He pushed me harder into the wall. “Because we both know what it does to you?” I bit my lip and looked up into his eyes. He smirked. “See? Submissive.”

I pushed him back away from me, feeling irritated. “Oh, shut it.”

He chuckled. “Don’t feel bad. You come by it honestly. Your mum’s one, too.”

“Excuse me? How could you possibly know that?” Okay, he wasn’t wrong. I’ve known my parents were D/s since I found the ball-gag and paddle in their closet, but it baffled me that he figured it out so quick.

“Her choker, which says ‘Doll’, I believe. Don’t worry. I won’t make you wear one.”

I rolled my eyes. “Come on, Tom. You know I wouldn’t wear anything I didn’t want to.”

“But you’d want to if I gave it to you, wouldn’t you?” He smiled. “There’s absolutely nothing wrong with it.”

I sighed. “Yeah, I know that. Fine, but… we have to have a talk about what I’m okay with… establish safe words and whatnot.”

“Tonight. For now, I’d like to take you and Nova to lunch.” He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'd been home, chilling with Tom and Nova and my parents, for a few weeks when a fan sent me a link on Twitter to a tumblr post titled 'A theory that's gonna get me a lot of hate: Jensen Ackles cheated on his wife.'

I clung to the word 'theory' as I started to read.

'I know people are gonna give me shit about this and I kinda feel like a tin-hat by saying it, but I think it's different because it seems like the tin-hats want what they're saying to be true and I hope I'm wrong. But let's check the receipts, okay?

A year and a few months ago, y/f/n y/l/n joined the show. An incredibly attractive young actress who is a documented Jensen stan (About 24:30 on this video, where she talks about almost passing out the first time she met him). That is the story of a woman who'd sell her soul to a demon for a single night with the man she's describing, but somehow they ended up friends?

Okay. We might be able to chalk that up to Jensen's welcoming nature, I guess, but it's kinda weird that Jared and Jensen don't hang out with their other friends like they did with y/n. Even with misha, we don't get a lot of pictures of them hanging out off-set or away from conventions. She partied with them, hung out on set even on days she didn’t need to be there, ate lunch or dinner with them every freaking day, ran lines in Jensen's trailer (this video where she talks about running lines). I'm gonna call this 'The Buttering-up' stage. Jensen knew she had terrible self-esteem (about 34:10 into this video) and he had to get her comfy around him before he came onto her, or she'd never believe it.

I think it probably started right before or right after JaxCon, 'cause that's when she moved into his apartment in Vancouver. (this clip from SeaCon). Come on! They were roommates! (cue tumblr echo: They were roommates!) and over the next eight months we were treated to pictures like this: Standing way too close together to be innocent, inappropriate skin contact, is that his hand on her ass while they're singing 'Hotel California'? I think it is! Is that his hand on her thigh in this steakhouse in Vancouver? Looks like it, to me. Oh, and this scene from the season 13 blu-ray extras. Check the background. I can't be the only one who sees how sexually aggressive that stance is. That's a stance that screams, 'I'm gonna fuck you 'til you can't walk straight'. If this were a sexual harassment seminar, that'd be the 'what not to do' with your way younger coworker who idolizes you and whom you have the power to get fired. This stance is a 'Me Too Movement' no-no.

Eight months of that shit, then nothing. Since AtlCon, since y/n's birthday, they've all but ignored each other. No fun back-and-forths on Twitter, no lunches where they sit too close together, no singing together at Saturday Night Special... hell, she's been put down as 'Friday/Saturday only' for the next several cons and she was seen loading all of her stuff up into a storage pod a couple weeks after her birthday. Their 'friendship' seems to be dead.

So, what happened? Tom Hiddleston happened. I know y/n says they're just friends, but she sang that duet with him, and you could totally tell there was attraction there. And not a half an hour later, several volunteers and vendors take to Twitter to say y/n and Jensen were fighting. One said he heard Jensen say, "I love you. You know that." Then, she forgoes her normal Reba or Heart song to sing Sugarland's 'Stay' for the SNS. For those that don't know, that's a song about the other woman ending an affair because she deserves more out of life. Coincidence? Maybe.

Maybe this is all bullshit and my brain's making patterns where there are none. But maybe Jensen's a human being who doesn't get to see his wife very often and he did something stupid. Maybe y/n was just as lonely, if not more so (I mean, she has been divorced for years and has said that she hasn't had so much as a boyfriend since her divorce). Maybe she couldn't say no to Jensen fucking Ackles, because who the fuck could? Maybe they had an affair that ended when she met Tom Hiddleston. Maybe that's why it seems like they haven't spoken in two months.

Or maybe they're still good friends and her work with Marvel is keeping her too busy to hang. Maybe they were never as good of friends as they made it seem. Maybe I’m just completely wrong about all of this, but look at it. It makes sense.

I read over it, looked at all of the pictures, my heart pounding in my chest. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I sent the link to Jared with a half dozen exclamation points. Twenty minutes of pacing in my parents’ kitchen later, Jared called. “That’s crazy.”

“That’s all you’ve got to say to me? ‘That’s crazy’?”

Jared chuckled in my ear. “Y/n, she’s got nothin’ but fuckin’ theories. She has no evidence. All of her pictures are blurry. It’s conjecture.”

“But she’s right! How could she be so fucking right?”

“‘Cause some of our fans are really fucking smart, y/n, and they’ve got active and creative imaginations. I mean, you’ve read the fanfictions… you’ve written the fanfictions. Jensen says not to worry about it.”

I bit my lip and sighed, thinking about Jensen’s reaction to it. “How is he?” I couldn’t help but ask.

There was a moment of silence before he sighed. “He misses you. He seems kinda depressed.” I took a deep breath to stave off the feeling of guilt. “He’s drinking a lot… and for a guy who owns a fucking brewery, a lot is… a lot.”

“You have to stop him, Jare. You need to-”

“Don’t act like I’m not the one here trying to help him, y/n. I am. I have been trying to help him, but he’s… he’s been resistant. Which, you know, isn’t your fault, but-”

“I know you’re there for him, Jared, it’s just… maybe he needs a break. Maybe you could talk to Dabb for him. Maybe they could give him a few weeks. Or maybe...” I rolled my eyes. “You know how he gets when he doesn’t have any stress relief. He probably just needs to get laid. Help him find a new one.”

“A new you?”

“Yeah. A new mistress. Someone pretty.” I looked down. “Prettier than me. Pretty like Danneel.”

“It's not that easy, y/n. He can't just find someone to replace you. Do you realize how long it took to find someone he was attracted to that his wife approved of? Someone who would work to keep it under wraps, who'd freak out if a fan started rumors? You were a fuckin’ unicorn for him. There’s not gonna be another you.” I shook my head. That really wasn’t what I wanted to hear. “And, look, I’m not trying to make you feel bad, I understand why you had to leave, but… you’re irreplaceable and Jensen’s just gonna have to deal with it.”

“Yeah. Okay. Look, I gotta go. If Jensen’s not worried about it… if you think I shouldn’t be worried, then I won’t worry. Give my love to Gen and the kids.”

“Hey.” Jared’s voice made me stall my hang-up procedure.

“Yeah?”

“I miss you, too, ya know? You should call me more often.”

I nodded. “Yeah. I will. And you’ll see me in a few weeks. I got a few shooting days before my Marvel press tour, and after that I’m gonna be back in VanCity.”

“Can’t wait to see ya, y/n.”

“Try to get Jensen okay before I get there. Please?”

“I’m tryin’.”

“All right. See ya, Jare.”

“See ya.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few days later, I walked into the house after having made a trip to the Wal-mart up the street. "Us Weekly thinks I'm stalking you." I said, making a beeline for the table, where Tom sat with a cup of tea and his newest script. I dropped the Walmart bags on the table and took the seat next to him.

"Oh, do they?"

"Yeah. Apparently, we're always at the same places because I'm obsessed with you and you're too polite to tell me to fuck off."

"Well, they're half right. You are obsessed with me." He smirked as he set his script down and picked up the teacup. "We wouldn't have this problem if you'd let me make the announcement."

I shook my head. "I told you, Tom, your fans scare me. Besides, both of our last relationships were spectacular failures. This way, if something goes wrong, we don't have to deal with-"

"What could go wrong?"

"You could walk." I said, looking away from him.

"You think I'm going to leave you, like Nate did." He said, setting the teacup on the table and looking across at me.

I felt small under his gaze and swallowed. "Like every other person I've ever dated." I stood and grabbed the bags. "If we don't tell anybody that we're dating, then I don't have to deal with the pity when it ends. I don't have to be the woman who chased away Tom Hiddleston."

There was a moment of silence before he picked up his script again. "I understand.” He said, in a voice that said he didn’t understand.

“Tom.”

“You have a parent-teacher conference to attend, don’t you?” He reminded me, coldly.

“Yeah.” I leaned forward. “Are you mad at me?”

His eyes flashed to mine. “You’d know if your master were mad, wouldn’t you, Dear?” He asked, voice low, using my sub name. Exactly.

“Yes, sir.”

“Then, go to your meeting.” He ordered. I nodded, standing. “Do not touch your ex-husband.”

“Yes, sir.” I wasn’t planning to.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I turned my phone back on after the parent-teacher conference, my Twitter app had so many notifications it just said ‘99+’. Facebook Mentions was the same. The source? A status update to Tom's seldom-updated Facebook page. My mouth went dry as I read his words.

'6 months ago saw a rewrite to the Marvel Cinematic Shorts Anthology script, which brought a new minor character. Kevin Feige knew who he wanted in the role before the script was even done being altered; a relatively unknown actress with a single acting credit to her name- y/f/n y/l/n. I was immediately drawn to the woman and asked her for drinks before we'd finished in Hair and Makeup the morning I met her. I'd fallen in love before the week was out. Y/n is a private woman, not used to being so in the public eye, so I acceded to her request for discretion, portraying myself as her friend whenever someone might be looking. I tried to convince her several times that we should go public over the past 2 months and she dismissed each attempt. This morning I discovered the reason. She's expecting I will leave. She doesn't want anyone profiting on her heartbreak or to give them a reason to judge or, worse, pity her. But I'm not planning to leave. I have no desire to be another on her short list of past relationships. I've resisted the urge to shout the truth of my heart from the rooftops, but no longer. I'm in love with this sweet Southern woman and leaving her is not an option for my heart.'

Accompanying the status was a picture Tom took in his room at the Ritz; me, in just panties and his ratty black t-shirt (which came to my mid-thigh), looking out the bedroom window at the lights of downtown Atlanta. It was one of his favorite pictures of me, which he'd taken the Sunday after ATLcon.

I didn't go through too many of the comments, but the few I looked at were positive notes congratulating Tom on his happiness. A few said, "Who wouldn't want the world to know they were dating Tom?" and then came the SPN Family with, "She's a divorced Mom who probably doesn't want the media to descend upon her private life like the vultures they are. Also, she probably doesn't feel like she deserves him." and links to con videos where I talk about being fat, depressed, having low self-esteem and the toxic relationship I had with Nate.

When I switched to Twitter, the story was different. Most of the mentions were something along the lines of '@taylorswift13 have u heard about @twhiddleston and @y/l/n_y/n?' Taylor responded with, 'Uh, excuse me, but #whothehellisy/l/n_y/n?' The Swifties ran with the hashtag and 'whothehellisy/l/n_y/n' was trending by the time I got to Twitter. I responded with '@taylorswift13 Big Fan since 'Tim McGraw'. I'm an actor no one's heard of. If i catch the meaning behind your tag, you want to know 1/2' then I replied to it. 'How an absolute nobody ended up with a man who used to be yours. Honestly, I'm just as lost as you are. #sonotworthy. 2/2'

I was hoping that a modest and non-confrontational response was the best way to go. I got in my car and drove home, seething. When I walked into the house, I slammed the door behind me. Tom walked into the living room as I dropped my purse and jacket on the couch. He was dressed in my favorite dark grey suit and had his hair the way I like. Trying to minimize my anger through looking like a damn dream. "I'm so sorry." He said.

"You just flipped my life on its end and all you have to say to me is 'sorry'?"

"I understand how livid you must be, y/n, but-"

"'Livid' isn't even a strong enough word, Tom, but I'm so ticked off that I can't think of a stronger one! My name is trending on Twitter, I've had more Mentions in the past hour than I have since joining the site, your fans are probably plotting my death as we speak, a picture that you took in an intimate setting is now forever on the internet and Taylor Swift followed me just so that she could DM me. She's delightful, by the way, wants to have drinks next time I'm in Nashville. Oh, and there wasn't any kind of upset at the White House or a police shooting or terror attack today, so guess what the late night talk shows are gonna be monloguein' 'bout? Thank God you posted that status early enough for them to get in on this!"

He sighed. "I suppose it was a very dramatic and public way to go about it, but it was best to get it done, get it out of the way and move on. I’m just trying to do what’s best for you. Sometimes, you need that. Dear.” The word made me want to slip into that sub persona, but I fought it. He doesn’t get to do the voice and look at me with those stupid blue eyes and then everything’s okay. “We'll be a hot topic for a few weeks and then, people won't care until there's a ring on your finger."

"Don't talk about getting married when I'm still so angry with you!" I paced in front of him, angrily. "You completely disregarded my wishes. We talked about it for months and I never wanted people to know, what would make you-"

He grabbed my arm as I paced, stopping me in front of him. "I couldn't stand it, anymore. I love you and I can't pretend I don't, any longer. I want people to ask me 'Why her?' so I can tell them every single thing I adore about you. I want to fly you and Nova to London for a long weekend and hold the hands of my two favorite girls as we walk down Oxford Street and I buy you whatever your heart desires. I couldn't keep this to myself, anymore, especially after finding out that you only wanted it secret so that it'd be easier for me to leave you." He ran his hands down my arms. "I'm not leaving."

"Fuck." I looked up into his eyes. "You suck."

He smiled. "You love me."

"You better be glad I do. I wouldn't tolerate this shit if I didn't."

"I'm ecstatic to be recipient of your love." He said, leaning down to kiss me. I pulled away and grabbed the remote from the coffee table. "What are you doing?"

"I'm setting the DVR to record Conan, Colbert, Fallon, Kimmel and Corden. They're gonna be talking about me and I wanna see what they say."

"You don't need to-"

I put my hand up as he spoke. "I deserve to know, Tom. Don't argue with me on this."

"All right. Once you've set that up, will you please come have a cuppa with me?"

"You can make me a cup of vanilla chamomile with honey. I'll be in there in a minute."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kimmel had poked fun at me, like I'd assumed he would. I'm a witch, so I must've cast a spell on him, according to the first Jimmy. Fallon was a bit nicer, mostly just questioning who the heck I am. Colbert said he liked a mystery and was excited that I was part of the MCU Cinematic Shorts promotional tour coming through next week. Conan was more interested in Taylor's hashtag and my humble response, what I must've said in the DMs to get her to retract her dismissive attitude.

But Corden, oh James fucking Corden... Were I not already a fan, his mono would have made me one. "World War III didn't start today, North Korea hasn't bombed us, yet, and there weren't any resignations from the White House, so we get to discuss something far more important than any of that: Tom Hiddleston and his new girlfriend." The audience laughed. "Now, you might have noticed that the hashtag 'whothehellisy/l/n_y/n' was trending on Twitter most of the day and that was in response to Tom Hiddleston's declaration of love on Facebook. A lot of people, Tom's ex Taylor Swift included, have never heard of the young woman who's playing opposite him in the next Marvel movie. We at The Late Late Show are on fairly late, though, so we had more time before shooting to look into the question of 'who the hell is y/l/n y/n?'. Y/l/n_y/n is the Twitter handle of this woman, y/f/n y/l/n." He held up a picture of me, a headshot that I had taken by Stardust & Melancholy. "She's 29 years old, a divorced single mother who has only two acting credits on her Internet Movie Database page. She has a small but loyal fanbase made up of people who watch the show she was on: Supernatural. She's spoken, at length, about her marriage and her poor self esteem and she's just..." He dropped the picture to the stage.

"I don't have jokes. Y/f/n is so certain that Tom is going to leave her that she didn't want people to even know that she was dating him. She's certain that she's not good enough, not perfect enough, and that's why he told the world but I've been the chubby kid on this playground we call 'Hollywood' and I have doubted many good things that happened to me because this society has told me that good things would never happen to me. Miss y/l/n has captured the attention of one of Britain's best, a man so at home in a Shakespearean tragedy that I thought he actually was King Henry when I met him. You deserve the good, Miss y/l/n. You deserve the happiness. And I deserve an invite to the wedding."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" Tom asked, cuddling into my back wrapping his arms around me.

"No, but you do know that there's going to be paparazzi here in a couple days, right? Like, all over the place."

"Yes. Perhaps we should get one of the rentals on the beach. Better security."

"We'd have to drive Nova to school in the morning."

"I think it'd be better."

"Yeah, but I think it'd be a waste. You want a condo? Research, do it right. Get a good one. I mean, I'm going to Vancouver in two days to shoot, then we're going on the press tour for the movie. We've got time to find a good condo, maybe on the Island, maybe Destin. There's some good places in Navarre and Bluewater. Gulf Breeze. Why are you looking at me like that?" I asked as he rolled on top of me and stared down at me.

"I love you." He said, simply.

"I love you, too." I responded.

"You're making plans. A place that's ours, here."

"And in London." I whispered. "I know that's where you'd prefer. Your theatres are there."

"But Nate would never allow you to move Nova across the Atlantic."

"Hence, a condo here and a place in London. We'll just have to figure it out as we go along."

"I'd like nothing more."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tom and I went to the airport together. He was flying back to London, I was flying to Vancouver. We’d meet in New York for our Late Show appearance in a week. He handed me a box when we got to the airport. I opened it to reveal a bracelet, a simple thick band made of leather with ‘TOM’S’ stamped into it. “You can wear it upside-down, if you want. As long as you know what it means.” I stared down at it for a moment and he plucked it out of the box. “I told you I wouldn’t make you wear a choker, Dear, but I want you to remember… while you’re away from me… who you belong to.”

“You think, ‘cause I’m away from you…”

“I think you’re going to be in the same building as Jensen and I want you to have a reminder on your wrist of who you are. My Dear. Mine.” His long fingers attached the leather band upside-down on my wrist. “Don’t take it off unless you have to for a scene and if you do have to remove it, you put it right back on afterward. Do you understand?”

I nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“Good girl.” He whispered, pushing his hand into my hair and pulling me into a deep kiss. I could hear camera shutters across the way but I tried to ignore it. That was going to be a part of my life for the rest of my career and relationship. “I love you.”

“I love you, too. Call me when you land?”

“Of course.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vancouver seemed like a different place when I got there. It was like I was a visitor in my own home. People were staring at me, I felt uncomfortable, I just wanted to go back to where it was safe in Tom’s arms.

Jared rushed to Hair and Makeup when he heard I was on the lot. “Hey! You’re here!”

His happy face and warm eyes washed away some of my discomfort. “Yeah. A couple days of Second Unit stuff before I go on promo tour for Marvel.”

“Well, it’s good to have you back, even for a couple days.” He smirked. “So, that Facebook post, huh?”

I rolled my eyes, picking at the metal fastener on my bracelet. “He thought it was the best thing to do.”

“But obviously, you don’t agree.” Jared said, dropping into the empty chair next to me.

“Well, I don’t always make the best decisions, you know. Tom is better at that stuff.”

“I don’t know. I thought you were doing pretty fuckin’ good with decisions over the last couple years. I mean, you were making your life better.”

“Also making it worse… and certain other peoples’ lives.” I shrugged. “Sometimes I just need to have someone help me figure out what to do.”

“Yeah. Okay.” Jared seemed skeptical of my words. Well, they were actually Tom’s words, but whatever. “Hey, you should come to dinner with me tonight. You’re only in town for a couple days. I haven’t gotten to see you in a couple months. We gotta catch up.”

I nodded. “Okay. As long as… as long as it’s just the two of us.”

“Uh, yeah. Jensen’ll understand.” Jared said, standing. “Gotta go. I’ll text when I’m ready to get food.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dinner was actually a very, very late drink and some bar grub at Black Bear Pub. “So, what’s he like, huh?”

“Tom?”

“Yeah, Tom. He, like, fuckin’ swept in and stole you away so he’s gotta be really fuckin’ amazing, right?”

“He didn’t steal me away, J-pad. Come on.”

“Kinda did, y/n. And I’m not even talking about him stealing you from Jensen. I’m talking… how much time have you spent with the Wayward Women lately? How much time have you spent with anyone other than Tom?”

I shrugged. “You remember how the honeymoon phase goes.”

“Well, I miss you. Kim and Bri and Rob and Rich, they miss you, too.”

“They see me more than you do.”

“They say you’re not really there when you’re there.”

I picked at the bracelet again. “I’ve just had a lot on my mind, you know. Between what happened with Jensen and fighting Nate for custody and trying to hide my relationship and recently dealing with the aftermath of his Facebook bullshit… I’ve just got a lot going on.” I picked up my drink and took a sip.

Jared watched my face for a few moments. “But you are happy, though… right?”

I smiled. “Yeah. I am. He’s a great guy. He’s incredibly intelligent, attractive, and nice. He wants… everything for me. He’s helping me with my career. He’s helping me get out of my parents’ house. I mean…” I looked down, rubbing my fingers over the bracelet. “It’s not just about what he’s doing for me. He makes me feel like everything’s gonna be okay, like I’m gonna be okay. He’s this incredibly calming force. He makes me feel safe just by being around me. Everything’s controlled with him. Even the chaos is controlled chaos.”

Jared nodded. “Okay. Long as you’re happy.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I got to the hotel in New York, Tom greeted me in the lobby. Cameras went off outside the door as he wrapped his arms around me, but they weren’t allowed in the building. “I’ve already checked us in. Let’s go up to the room.”

“Okay.”

He picked up my bag and we headed to the elevators. “So, how was Vancouver?”

“It was good. It was weird, but good.”

“And did you see any of your old friends?” His tone was clipped. He was trying to sound conversational, but he was definitely asking if I’d seen Jensen and he was already teetering on upset at the thought that I might have.

“Just Jared. He took me to get a drink.” I hit the call button for the elevator and turned to look up at him. “Jensen was shooting on location with Samantha this week so he was easy to avoid.”

Tom smiled, brightly. “And how are you liking your bracelet?” He asked, taking my hand in his and sliding the sleeve of my jacket down my arm. He smiled to see it still on my wrist. “Did you have to take it off, at all?”

“Yeah. For work. Tara wears rose quartz beads on her wrist. I smoothed it out and tucked it in my bra, though, when I couldn’t wear it. Figured it still served its purpose of reminding me if it were next to my heart.”

“And you put it right back on your wrist as soon as you were done?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good girl.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Getting out of the back of the Town Car with Tom's hand in mine was new and it was nice until one of the women in the crowd outside of Ed Sullivan Theater with Tom's face on her t-shirt shouted out that 'the piggy should just up and die!'. Tom wrapped his arms around me and refused to sign anything for anyone in the crowd. I heard from security a few minutes later that they had to break up a fight because the woman was being assaulted for causing everyone else to lose their interaction with Tom. Tom was soothing me when we entered the green room. Sebastian Stan and Anthony Mackey stopped talking when we walked in. "Sebastian! Anthony! Good to see you!"

"Don't think we didn't notice you hijacked our press tour with your Facebook Romeo bullshit." Mackey said, sitting up to grasp Tom's hand.

"If he's Romeo, that makes me Juliet. I don't wanna be Juliet. She's a whiny little teenager. Can I be Mercutio?"

"Only if I can be Tybalt." Sebastian answered, reaching his hand out to shake mine.

"You wanna kill me, already? We just met." I joked.

"Hey!" Anthony slapped Sebastian's shoulder. "I thought we were reserving judgment, man. That is not your 'reserving judgment' face."

"What? She's funny."

"That means a lot, coming from you. I am a big fan."

"Yeah?"

"Definitely. I mean, I watched 'I, Tonya' and I give zero fucks about Tonya Harding. Also, Political Animals, even though it caused fights between me and my mom." I turned to Mackey. "And, of course, 'Detroit' was amazing!"

"You saw it?"

"Oh, yeah. It was super informative. No one ever thought to explain to me why the Detroit riots happened."

"Well, if it gets folks talking..."

"Yeah, definitely. ‘course, it's harder to talk to some folks than others. My mom is one of those folks who thinks that just because she didn't realize there was a race issue when she was growing up in Compton in the 70s, that means it didn't exist."

"Oh, so she didn't know there was a race issue 'cause she's a bigot?" Anthony concluded.

I nodded. "Yeah, pretty much. Two California-raised conservatives who voted for McCain and Trump ended up raising a trio of Liberal-leaning Independents who voted for Obama and Clinton. They're so confused."

"Must be a hard household to live in." Sebastian commented.

"Definitely. One I still live in, unfortunately. Had to move back after the divorce ‘cause I didn’t have any money and now, just haven't had the time since I got the money."

"We're working on that." Tom cut in, with a sigh.

"Tom gets so uncomfortable when my mom and I start in on each other about politics." I said, with a smile. "He's so non-confrontational about things like that."

"Yeah, he's British, what do you expect?" Sebastian said.

"I don't really get that. You know the Brits kinda ruled the world through conquest and confrontation for hundreds of years, right?"

"Oh, she's pullin' out history!" Mackey responded.

"I'm not saying it's a bad thing, but once the Queen gave up power to Parliament, that's when the whole super-polite, non-confrontational thing got its legs. I, however, know that there are confrontational Brits. I’ve had a bunch of women spewing hate at me since Tom’s little announcement."

"Wow." Sebastian said.

"Yeah, Tom’s fans are not… not happy with me. Anyway..." I leaned against Tom and he wrapped his arms around me. "I know Colbert is gonna want us to talk about us but I will redirect the conversation as fast as possible."

"Sounds good." Anthony said, nodding.

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caranfindel · 5 years

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Recap/review 14.11: “Damaged Goods”

THEN: Oh, good, we're going to have a Nick episode. I was hoping for that. (NOT.) Michael is trapped in Dean's internal walk-in. Billie has bad news related to that.

NOW: Nick interrogates a demon about another demon named Abraxis. The name sounds a little familiar and I waste a few seconds wondering where I've heard it before, but then I realize it's the demon who killed Nick's family and this has been Nick's entire focus and that's how little I care about Nick and his quest, that I couldn't even bother to remember who he was after. Anyway, he learns that the hunter who last dealt with Abraxis is in Hibbing. Oooh, who else do we know in Hibbing?

Title card!

Dean is packing. Books about angels. Tools. Work gloves. I was a little afraid we were going to ignore last week's horrifying revelation, and Dean would just sit on that information for a while. But he's wearing his Red Shirt of Bad Decisions, so we know the shit is going down tonight! \o/

He leaves the storeroom and kind of looks down the hallway, which is really insignificant the first time you watch this episode, but on rewatch you realize what he's thinking right here, and that he doesn't ever expect to see this hallway again... but I'm getting ahead of myself. He goes into the library, where Sam is quietly studying in the darkness (is that a new shirt? I like it). He ignores it when Sam asks how he's feeling. Dean tells Sam he appreciates that he's trying to help him, and Sam's all, yeah, what else would I do? He asks if Dean wants to join him, and they have this conversation.

Actually, I thought I'd go for a drive, you know, just me and Baby, long stretch of road. And figured I'd make it a two-fer, go see Mom at Donna's cabin.

Yeah, yeah, that sounds great. Be good to see them. Just let me find a stopping point and get packed up.

Actually, I was, uh, I was kind of hoping for some one-on-one time with Mom, if that's cool.

Yeah. Sure, yeah. Whatever you need.

And I thought this conversation was going to break my heart, because Sam clearly does NOT think this trip sounds great, but he's going to go anyway because it's what Dean wants/needs to do, and then Dean rejects that, and Sam's little face is going to do me in. And on rewatch, it kind of seems like Dean is stalling here, like he can't bring himself to leave (but again, I'm getting ahead of myself) AND THEN THIS HAPPENS.

Dean comes around behind Sam and HUGS HIM and says "take care, Sammy" and I'm just WHAAAAT. NO THIS IS NOT RIGHT. THIS IS SUCH A BAD, BAD SIGN, SAM WINCHESTER, AND YOU KNOW IT.

And also, there goes the rest of my heart.

Cut to Mary at the aforementioned cabin, talking to Sam on the phone. She says the cabin's been quiet since Bobby took off for a few days. The old "I need a little space after killing the ghoul version of my dead son" thing. Happens to the best of us. Sam tells her he's worried because Dean's acting so weird, and mentions the hug. Mary says "that's sweet," proving that she doesn't know her sons at all. Really, Mary, you've witnessed ONE hug between them. ONE. Sam points out that they don't hug unless it's "literally the end of the world," which isn't quite true. It would be more accurate to say "unless one of us is dying or just came back from the dead," which is slightly more frequent than the end of the world Either way, Mary assures him that everything will be fine. But as Sam's talking to her, he's walking through the storerooms in the bunker and he sees some books are missing.

(Sidebar: Why are these books kept in the storeroom and not the library? And why are regular tools apparently kept with supernatural paraphernalia? Couldn't that cause problems? What if a MoL novice was sent to Storeroom 2 for a reciprocating saw and he couldn't figure out why a saw would reciprocate or what that would look like and he came back with something he dug out of a curse box instead? I'm seeing all kinds of potential OSHA violations here.)

Now we see Dean enjoying a messy burger. Oh, he's with Donna! I love Dean and Donna, y'all. She tries to ask him about himself, but he keeps deflecting. Which doesn't fool her at all, and she finally says "just wondering if you've run out of ways to ask me how I'm doing, so as to avoid me repaying the favor." She knows about Michael, because of Sam. "What, has he got a freaking newsletter," Dean grumps. But I'm glad to see Sam's been talking to his support system, because in the past, he's not done that as often as he should.

Dean ends the conversation with the typical "I'm fine" nonsense and gives Donna one of those big hugs where he looks absolutely stricken while she can't see him and then plasters on a smile when they pull apart, and you KNOW how I love when he does that. He pulls away and says "I'll see ya." But it's pretty obvious Dean is on his farewell tour and never intends to see Donna again. It's also pretty obvious that Donna can tell something is up.

Dean pulls up to the cabin, which is seriously in need of some work on the roof, and immediately hears gunshots. It turns out to be Mary murdering some pumpkins for target practice. (SHE'S STILL GOT THAT LOCK OF TOO-LONG HAIR.) He tells her he wants to stick around for a couple of days, which surprises her. She suggests they call Sam to join them, but he says he wants to be "a little greedy with my Mom time." No, Dean, that's not suspicious at all. Jesus. (Or, as someone pointed out, Sorry Sam, but Mom was MY gift.)

Mary pushes it, and Dean comes right out and says "I don't want Sam here," and again, Dean, that's not suspicious at all. How is someone who lies professionally such a BAD liar? He explains his mood away by claiming to be hangry, even though he just finished the best burger in all of Minnesota, and tells Mary he wants the one thing she can cook, something called Winchester Surprise. She heads out to the grocery store, and doesn't suggest that the son who drove all this way to see her would want to ride along. Or maybe she does, and he refuses, and they just didn't show us that part. Anyway, the important thing is, Dean's alone and he has work to do.

He gets his bag out of the Impala and strides purposely into a large shed decorated with pictures of topless guys with 70s porn 'staches. The first one reminds me a LOT of Doug 2.0, so I laugh when Dean says "Well, Donna certainly has a type." Yes she does. He finds an 8-track player, of all things, but is interrupted by a sudden burst of Michael banging on his door. The tape he chooses is the Guess Who, and the song is "No Time Left For You," which I've never liked (lots of experience with 70s music here, kiddos) but it seems appropriate. And then he gets to work, and if you thought Sam soldering last week was hot, you're in for a treat. Let's forget our annoyance with the soundtrack and concentrate on how much we appreciate Metalworking!Dean, complete with welding helmet and safety goggles, under the watchful eyes of several shirtless moustachioed cowboys.

Mmmm, yes, we do appreciate it.

(Sidebar: Where did all this metal come from?)

Meanwhile, at the grocery store, we get a fake-out where we think someone threatening is accosting Mary, but it's only a friendly employee. And we also see that Mary puts her grocery bags in the bed of her truck? So not only does she not know how to cook, but she doesn't even know where to PUT FOOD? I.e., IN THE CAB?

He says buying food is new for her, because she usually buys whiskey, pumpkins, and crossword puzzles. Damn, Mary, it really seems like things aren't going well out there at the Love Shack if you're spending all day drinking, shooting pumpkins, and doing crossword puzzles. I'm gonna go ahead and call it - Mobby is doomed. She tells him she has family in town, which I expect to turn into the inevitable oh no, this guy is a demon and now he knows Dean is there.

But I'm exactly wrong. Nick pulls up in the creepiest windowless van possible and asks the guy if he knows where Mary Winchester is. Because why wouldn't he? Why wouldn't Random Grocery Store Guy know where everyone in Hibbing Minnesota, population 16,361, resident or guest, lives? Random Grocery Store Guy pretends he doesn't know who she is. Good for him.

(BTW, the fastest route from Lebanon to Hibbing is about 12.5 hours. But it's all interstate and I suspect either Winchester would take the route that uses more state highways and is 13.5 hours.)

(Sidebar: Yes, when I open Mapquest, Lebanon is always in my Recents. Is that not normal?)

Apparently Nick decides he'll just cruise the greater Hibbing area and try to find her, because we seem him after nightfall driving his creepy van. A police car drives by, and then turns around and pulls him over. He makes sure his stolen angel blade is in place and hides a paperclip somewhere on his person before the officer gets to him. Oooh, it's Donna!

She cuffs him and tells him the van's been reported stolen, but she also reveals she knows he's looking for Mary, and don't like the way she lays all her cards on the table like that. Let him think you're just arresting him for a stolen car, Donna. Don't let him know you're onto his Grand Scheme. He says his name is "Nunya" and then "Eat Me" (oooh, is he related to the Eat Me Sam met a few seasons ago?), but she's got some kind of mobile fingerprint scanner. Does this thing exist? She discovers who he is, but while her back is turned, he uses his paperclip to get out of the cuffs. They fight, and she seems to have the upper hand, but he gets her taser and that's the end of that.

Love Shack. When Mary pulls up, Dean is outside by the door to the Shed of Mysterious Building. He lies about what he's doing out there and carries the groceries inside, to where the table is set and he wants to help her cook (THIS IS NOT OKAY) and she FINALLY realizes something is up. (Also, Dean, we know you're not a terrible cook. Don't lie just to make your mom feel better.) She quietly talks to Sam from upstairs (though not quietly enough, Dean totally would have heard her in the real world) and agrees that something is going on. Sam tells her about the missing items and says he thinks he should come up, but she says to give her more time. WHY, MARY. WHY DO YOU THINK YOU ARE THE PERSON TO ADDRESS THIS AND NOT SAM. WHY DO YOU INSIST ON KEEPING HIM 13.5 HOURS AWAY. WHY. It doesn't matter, because when Sam hangs up, we see he's already on his way. YES. THAT'S MY BOY.

Dinner. Dean tells a funny/tragic story about their childhood and Mary gets a case of The Sads, realizing how much she's missed and "how much the two of you just..." Just everything, Mary. They just EVERYTHING. Together. Without John, without you. AND STILL YOU THINK SAM SHOULD SIT IN THE BUNKER AND LET YOU HANDLE THIS. DAMMIT, MARY.

Anyway. Dean says her being alive has meant "everything to me, and everything to Sam." He claims to appreciate this wonderful time they're having, but he falters when he says "there's no clouds on the horizon." Because it's a LIE. She tells him he can talk to her about whatever he's going through, and he says "Everybody keeps asking me how I am. And how I am, is I don't want to talk about it. Please."

Oh lord, his face.

Later, as he snores gently on the couch, we see Mary tiptoe downstairs and outside, to check out what's happening in the Shed of Mysterious Building. (Sidebar: Dean sleeps with one arm flung behind his back, which I think we first saw in No Escape, and I always thought it was an odd and fake-looking way to sleep until I realized I actually do that sometimes myself.) She looks through the books and things and figures out what he's doing and it must be bad because she says "no, no, no." Meanwhile, Donna is waking up inside her own cruiser. I wonder why Nick left her alive?

Dean wakes up to the sound of a ringing phone. It's not his, it's Mary's. Donna is calling to warn him about Nick. But it's too late, because when Dean goes outside, Mary isn't there. But Sam is. "Hey, whoa, easy!" he says, facing down Dean's gun, and that tickles me for some reason.

Creepy van. Nick whines to Mary. He found email from Mary in Donna's phone, giving the address of the Love Shack. He thinks Mary knows where Abraxis is. She does - the demon is trapped inside an Enochian puzzle box in a storage locker, locately conveniently in or near Hibbing. I don't care about any of this.

At the Love Shack, Sam blames himself for Nick running around like a free madman, because of course he does. Donna's APB gets a result - the creepy van has been spotted outside Grand Rapids. Donna says that's 30-40 minutes away, but Grand Rapids is actually 11.5 hours away from Hibbing. Maybe there's a little town called Grand Rapids near Hibbing. A town so small that Mapquest doesn't even know about it.

(I KNOW. NO ONE CARES. MOVING ON.)

Nick gets the Enochian puzzle box (yeah, this scene goes on FOREVER and I'm skipping a lot here, is anyone complaining? nope didn't think so) and wants to release the demon so they can talk. Mary points out that the demon needs a host to talk, and it can't be Nick and it can't be her, and she flashes an anti-possession tattoo as explanation. So drills the box open and Nick forces the storage locker employee to be the host. Abraxis says he'll tell Nick why they killed his family if he kills Mary slow and bloody.

While this is happening, we see Sam and Dean on that 30 minute/11.5 hour drive to Grand Rapids. Sam looks despondent, and they have this conversation:

Say it. I can see you want to. Might as well go ahead and say it.

All right. Nick is not a project. He's not a freaking puppy. He was Lucifer's vessel for years.

I know that, Dean, I thought -

You thought he'd what, just walk it off? Come on, man, you're not that dumb.

It's not about being dumb, Dean, it's called compassion. Look, what happened to Nick could have happened to me. It almost happened to me. You change one little thing in our past and that WAS me! Lucifer wearing ME to the prom. Besides, since when do we give up on people? Since when do we just cut people loose?

Well, maybe you need to learn, okay? Because when people are past the point of saving, maybe you need to learn to walk away.

Ouch. I hurt for both of them. Poor Sam, seeing himself in Nick and wanting to save that guy the way he wishes someone had wanted to save him. Having faith in Nick's potential the way he wanted someone, anyone, to have faith in his own. And Dean obviously isn't talking about Nick, at least not there at the end, because we've heard it from Dean before, talking about himself. I can't be saved; walk away.

The guys arrive at the storage locker just in time to stop Nick from killing Mary slow and bloody. Nick scratches out the devil's trap that's holding the demon, and Abraxis immediately tosses them around and tells Nick he was chosen completely at random. Damn, Nick is as whiny as Lucifer was. (I wonder who influenced who? Discuss.)

Dean tries to quietly exorcise the demon, but Abraxis flings him against a shelf and we get a flash of skin. But before he can start killing anyone, Nick stabs him with the stolen angel blade. Then Nick acts like he's going to stab the others if they don't let him escape, so Donna shoots him in the leg. Dammit, Donna, this was the perfect opportunity to kill him. He already killed one person, and he was threatening to kill the rest of you. It would have been a clean shoot. Instead, Mary punches the wounded whiny baby and Sam does a wee little version of his glorious post-exertion huff.

Outside, Sam gives Nick a sad, confused look.

Why?

I needed the truth, Sam. I needed revenge for my family. You would have done the same thing.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't help you, I'm sorry I didn't know how.

It's not about you, Sam. It was never about you. You couldn't fix me because I didn't want to be fixed. I was never broken.

Yeah, Nick, you are. I don't feel sorry for you, Nick. I feel sorry for the people you hurt, the people you murdered. The people whose faces will haunt you every night for the rest of your life. You can burn.

FUUUUUCK. That's cold as hell and it's not like Sam Winchester at all and I love it to pieces. He's finally given up on this asshole. But it's finally time to move away from the B plot, and Mary tells Dean she saw what he was building in the shed. She knows what he's building, she knows what he's planning, and the three of them ARE going to talk about it. And if he doesn't tell Sam, she will. So, you finally think Sam's input is important, Mary? Good to know.

When the sun rises, we're back at the Shed of Mysterious Building. Dean is showing Sam what he's done. He calls it something like a "maloch box," which I'm sure is spelled wrong. It looks like a giant coffin (yeah, about that...) Nothing can escape it, not even an archangel. Sam knows what they are but says they're impossible to build, and Dean's all, "not so much." And then they have this conversation and I'm sorry (no I'm not), but I had to transcribe the whole thing.

That's your plan? You want to be buried alive?

Buried's not safe enough. Plan is, pay a little hush money, charter a boat to take me out to the Pacific. Splash.

You and Michael, trapped, together, for eternity.

Yeah.

You do realize how insane this is, right?

It's the only sane play I've got. Michael gets out, that's it for this world. And he will get out.

How do you know that for sure?

Because I do. Because I can feel him, in my head. That door is giving. I can feel it giving.

There has to be another way.

There's not, okay? There's... Sam, you've tried. Cas has tried. Jack. And I love you for trying, but none of it's going to work.

But we don't know that!

Yeah, we do.

What?

Billie. She paid me a little visit. She said that there's only one way that this ends right. And this is it. This, right here. This box. So she gave up the special recipe and all I had to do was the work. It's fate.

Since when do we believe in fate?

Now, Sam. Since now.

So, you came out here, to see Donna, to see Mom, on some what, some sick secret farewell tour? You were gonna leave, and you weren't even gonna tell me. Me. Do you realize how messed up that is? How unfair that is?

I didn't have a choice! Sam, you're the last person I could tell, the last person I could be around, cause you're the only one that could have talked me out of it! And I won't be talked out of it. I won't. I'm doing this. Now you can either let me do it alone, or you could help me. But I'm doing this.

...

All right.

Oh, guys.

Well, I've got to admit, Dean's prophesied horrifying death was a letdown. First, because it wasn't even new - it was basically the same fate Death offered him when he had the MoC. Worse, sure. Being locked in a box with an angry archangel rather than floating in space and having some kind of dream life, never a good option. (ASK SAM. HE KNOWS.) But mostly because it didn't live up to his reaction when he first read Billie's book. I was sure (and I wasn't alone) that his tearful reaction meant it was going to involve something horrible for someone he loves (SAM). But this? The Dean we know would have reacted the way he did when Rowena told him he had to "be the bomb" in order to destroy Amara. Yeah, this sucks, but I always knew it was gonna end ugly, so, whaddya gonna do?

(Sidebar: This brings up an interesting question. I know an angel's vessel is immortal, but would Dean still be immortal even though Michael was trapped inside his head? Would the fact that Michael wasn't in the driver's seat stop him from keeping his vessel alive? Or would the angel's grace do that all on its own?)

But oh, guys. This scene. THIS SCENE. These two. Dean saying I love you for trying. Dean at the beginning, chin up, so defiant, so defensive because this is exactly what he was afraid of - telling Sam, and having to stick to his plan. (He's probably remembering the last time Sam talked him out of this very thing, kneeling on the floor in front of him, agreeing to support the plan for Dean to lock himself up with the Mark of Cain forever, looking up at him with the puppy dog eyes and nodding to accept that Dean has to cut his head off in order to prevent him from undoing that act; or maybe he's not actually remembering that but now I am, goddammit guys, I need a minute.) And Sam realizing that last little hug was Dean's last planned goodbye, and being so angry and so hurt, and the way he looks so young there at the end, when he stops and finally says "all right." I know we've seen this before but IT STILL GETS ME. EVERY DAMN TIME.

(Sidebar: Did Dean leave Sam a note? Is it in the bunker somewhere? Because Sam's last conversation with his father was the old man saying I don't know why we always fight, now go away and his last conversation with his brother would have been I want to go visit Mom without you. Discuss. Fanfic it. Come wail with me about it.)

(Also... Dean's farewell tour didn't include Cas? Jack? Jody?)

Well. Happy 40th birthday, Dean Winchester.

Worst. Birthday. Ever.

So, this episode? Too much Nick. Not enough Sam. Things that did not live up to expectations. But also, things that were wonderfully unexpected. I've seen worse, my friends. What did you think? And please help me stay unspoiled, thanks!

#spn #14.11 #spoilers #tv recaps #review #season 14 #things that are not ok #sam winchester #dean winchester #dean’s red shirt of bad decisions

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