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melobin · 3 days

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behind the screen 𐙚 sungchan smau #35

✧ camgirl reader x roommate sungchan

✧ synopsis. in which sungchan discovers his favorite camgirl also happens to be his roommate

✧ wc. 2222

✧. warnings. written and smau. smut. live streaming, handjob, edging, praise, slight crying, sub!sungchan

behind the screen masterlist

you leaned back against your headboard as you watched people join your stream, your fingers tapping anxiously against your thigh as you watched the screen. your face looked back at you, body clothed with a delicately laced bra. nervous was an understatement, this wasn’t how you’d imagined you’d reveal your identity in the past but you had no choice, now your name was out there realistically there was nothing to hide.

you smiled as sungchan sat down beside you, his hand landing on your thigh. neither of you were dressed, he lacked a shirt and you lacked everything that wasn’t your under garments. you both knew how this stream was ending but for the meantime you had to focus on the important matter that stood in front of you. somi.

“shall we begin?” you smiled sweetly at the camera, trying to calm your nerves. you felt sungchan hand curl around your own, his thumb gently rubbing over the back of it, he soothed you non verbally and you were incredibly grateful, you weren’t sure if you would’ve been able to do it without him.

“i definitely don’t look professional enough to be discussing something so important”

“you look beautiful” sungchan lifted your hand to his lips and kissed the back of it gently, he let his lips linger there for a moment before he placed it back down into your lap “i’d listen to anything you’d say whilst you’re dressed like that, like okay ma’am” his eyes dropped down to where your bra cupped your breasts tightly, you rolled your eyes, laughing a little before focusing on the stream in front of you.

“i don’t really want to go into all of it but i also don’t want to sit and allow someone to create a false image of me online. somi seems like she’s a little mad and honestly i’m not even sure what she’s that mad over, i’ve spent the last few months attempting to ignore all of her pointless jabs and unnecessary comments, but it’s harder to do that when she does it so publically. granted, my real name is y/n y/l/n and i did used to have a job under her fathers company but that’s about the only true thing she wrote in her statement. as far as i know i haven’t manipulated anyone especially sungchan”

“she’s an ungrateful bitch” you shook your head, pressing your lips together as you attempted to stop yourself from laughing at sungchan’s sudden comment.

“nothing ever happened between me and sungchan till a few weeks ago and i think that’s normal? at least to me it feels normal for friendships to change over time, especially if you see the person everyday. sungchan was the man who joined me on stream a few weeks ago too and he was the man who won the competition to meet me and that was honestly the most insane thing that had ever happened to be honest someone should have recorded my reaction to opening the door and seeing him standing there” you were rambling and sungchan found it cute, he found it even cuter that your rambling was about him.

“anyway, regarding the other person mentioned, jake, most of you know him due to his streams and before i met jake i had a lot of respect for him but once we met that all just fell down the drain. i didn’t want to have sex with jake and he seemed to not like that, the moment i told him i wasn’t interested he became harsh towards me, if anything he seemed bitter so in the end i just began to ignore him because i didn’t want to deal with someone like that” sungchan squeezed your hand again, sitting silently as he listened to you talk.

“i lost my job which i kind of expected to happen to be honest but it’s whatever, i have streaming which i really enjoy and i have sungchan who i also really enjoy so i think i won here” sungchan laughed again.

“i think i won” you turned your head to look at him, smiling brightly up at him as he grabbed your jaw with his hand, you smiled wider as he kissed you.

“i think that’s all i have to say” sungchan nodded, going to pull away before you pushed your fingers into his hair “now please fuck me”

“straight away?” he laughed, kissing you again. your hands found their way onto his chest before you pushed him away and smiled.

“you’re right, there was something i wanted to do”

“oh?” you turned back to the stream and smiled

“i want to try something new” your fingers trailed over the skin of his abs, nails lightly digging into them. you looked back at him, pressing an open mouthed kiss against his shoulder “do you wanna play with me channie?” you kissed his skin again, leaning up a little as you nipped at the skin under his ear “i promise i’ll be good to you”. the deep breath sungchan let out told you everything you needed to know, of course he’d let you do what you wanted to him. in his mind, you didn’t even have to ask.

“anything you want baby” he breathed out and you smiled, shifting your position on the bed so you were sitting on your knees next to him. the camera captured the scene perfectly, he sat with his legs out and his back against your headboard, his briefs being the only thing on his body as you knelt next to him, your undergarments clinging to your skin as you smiled sweetly to him and traced the lines of his abs with your nails.

you trailed them further down his skin, pressing the tips of your fingers under his briefs before pulling them out. sungchan watched you carefully, unsure of what you were planning to do but he let you do it, sitting back almost obediently as you touched him. his body shivered as he felt your nails rake over his nipple, gulping whilst looking down at you. the innocent smile on your face only made things harder for him.

you leaned forward and kissed at his skin, your parted lips allowing your saliva to leave a wet trail behind you as you moved along his chest. it felt hot against his skin yet he shivered again, unable to keep himself still at the feeling of you against him. sungchan gasped when he felt your tongue flick over his nipple, your hand clawing its way down his body and into his briefs one more, this time releasing his cock from their restraints and wrapping your hand around it. you pumped him slowly, gently running your thumb over his tip before bringing your hand back down to the base. sungchan’s head fell back against the headboard, his thighs tensed as your tongue flicked over his nipple again. he never would’ve pictured himself in such a vulnerable position but he loved every second of it, this side of you was so incredibly hot to him.

sungchan sighed as he felt your hand squeeze the base of his cock, you pressed one last kiss to his skin before lifting your head and looking down at his cock. he throbbed in your hand, groaning when you squeezed him again.

“your cock is so big, channie” there was a slight moan in your voice as you spoke to him, it caused sungchan to groan again “almost too big for my hand” he let out a deep, shaky breath, barely being able to listen to the crude words you were saying to him as you jerked him off. the way you spoke to him and the way you touched him overwhelmed sungchan immensely. he struggled to hold himself together as he felt his orgasm approaching far too fast.

yet, once he announced he was close, all of the feelings were stolen away from him and his senses were replaced by the sound of you laughing sweetly whilst looking up at him. he felt speechless, his mouth going dry when you placed your hand around his cock again, only this time your hand moved faster and your eyes stayed on his. his parted lips let out a sweet whine and his eyes stayed open as he looked down at you. sungchan felt as if he was a complete wreck, unable to keep himself together as you let go of his cock again. you were edging him.

“baby” he moaned out, hissing as you grabbed his cock again. your eyes trailed over the stream that was active on your laptop, his eyes shined under the light of the screen as he looked at you through it. you admired the comments, how envious they were of the boy sat next to you and how incredibly hot it was to watch you edge him the way hyou were.

“they love it, channie” he whimpered again as you squeezed his throbbing cock, it was slick with precum by now, it made it easy for you to drag your hand up and down it with ease, a wet sound echoing throughout the room with each pump of your hand.

when you looked back at him you could see the weakness in his eyes, a glossy layer covered them as he let out a shaky breath. sungchan was not prepared to have you act this way toward him, yet he had no time to process it as your hand moved on his cock again. each time you grabbed his cock it took less time for you to let go again, the constant teasing had his legs shaking and his stomach tensing. he could barely handle it, his body growing weaker with each quick pump of your hand. what drove him more insane was the little giggles you let out every time you let go of him, the fact you were so clearly enjoying it so much ruined him.

“are you going to let me cum?” sungchan’s voice was broken, it thrilled you to hear him so ruined and weak because of you, tears beginning to fill up in his eyes.

“i don’t know, do you deserve it?” sungchan nodded instantly, his lips beginning to swell due to him biting them endlessly. you hummed, smiling again before turning your head to the stream “does he deserve it? i don’t think he does” you shook your head, faking an innocent smile as you read the comments.

you leaned your head against sungchan’s shoulder, hand still wrapped tightly around his cock “seems like they feel bad for you channie” you turned your head, kissing his shoulder before looking up at him “it’s your lucky day” your hand sped up on his cock again, you watched him as a single tear slipped out his eye and fell down his flushed cheek. cooing at him, you smiled and kissed it away, not stopping your hand that was driving him over the edge of insanity.

“i can’t” he cursed after speaking, his head falling back against the headboard once against as he bucked his hips up into your hand, barely hanging on as you brought him closer. there was a fire burning inside of sungchan’s stomach, his skin burned as his orgasm threatened to break him.

“you can do it baby, i know you can” you kissed his skin again, bringing your other hand up to lace through the messy strands of his hair, soothing him as he let his orgasm take over. sungchan wasn’t sure how long you were edging him for but with the intensity of his orgasm, it felt like forever. his body grew slack, his abs tensing as his cum splurted all over them.

“you done so well for me channie” you praised him, your fingers still soothing him as you helped him through his orgasm, only stopping your hand once you knew he had nothing left in him. you giggled again at hi fucked out state, in awe of how pretty he looked on the verge of crying.

sungchan didn’t expect you to your end your stream after that, you hid your goodbyes, promising to go live again that week as an extra treat for your views. once it was off and your laptop had closed you settled next to him with a cloth, gently wiping the cum off of his body whilst kissing his skin. sungchan, in his own mind, was not submissive, but if you were going to take care of him like this every time he was then he was sure he was going to change his mind.

“how are you feeling?” he looked down at you, smiling in a daze at your question.

“incredible, you?” you giggled at his sleepy words, cuddling into his side and looking at his face.

“i feel great channie” he smiled before stopping, his fingers gently touching your cheek. there was a comfortable silence between the two of you but it also felt as if there were unspoken words floating in the air. you stayed like that for a while, just watching each other as the moonlight washed over your skin from your window, it was only when you broke your silence that sungchan let out what he wanted to say.

“are you oka-?”

“i love you”.

behind the screen tag list

tag list. @midmourn @svnghan @strayhowls @minnieslover @shortnstupid @palchokitty @ilovechanhee e @hikict @wccycc @revehosh @teddywook @hoonieq @glaieuls @kvstjwonnie @starrypen @thinkabt-vivi @kyusqult @nanascupid @professsionalsimp @beomgri @xenkimmie @dinosluver @jaehmarks @hellonikitty @wolfiecaro @snoopyana @rosesfortaro @zhangyixingxing1 @hrts4tyun @forrds @mamathefifth @wonbinkisser @alwayswook @boogyu @haohoonz @wheatrice e @cvpidxo @soobsfairy444 @nadrs @wonbinfiles @tsumusakusa @chichiuu @bbgmingyu @outrologist @lilriswife4life @https-yeonjun @emoseob @riizenextdoor @h3lluh @shiannprincess101 @ioveslgn @iselltulips @w0nslvr r @vernonburger r @boopdidoo @planethyuka @joshuawifey @dearmyouth @bludzk1llzyuzu @andb1ue @reenfluffmarshmallow @jnkthy @luh @au-ghosttype e

#✧ melody posts #✧ behind the screen #riize smut #riize smau #riize sungchan smut #riize sungchan smau #sungchan smut #sungchan smau

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starsoftheeye · 2 days

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TMagP 17 Reaction

Pre-Episode

I've discovered that acting disinterested literally makes the episodes show up earlier on my youtube account, so I've gotta play mindgames on this app every thursday to get to see the episodes less than half an hour after they release lol

Pre-Statement

Ah Celia is back on her bullshit

Wait did she just nearly get ran over???

I feel bad for laughing at her but her only reaction being "Oh for gods sake" is super funny to me how long has she been doing this

oh hi sam

oh god she missed their date :[

something tells me a habit is going to be made of this, especially considering she literally cannot help it

"it really wasn't" yeah no wonder you nearly became roadkill

theyre so cute i love them

ooh shes mad

Statement

"catalyst" huh, have we heard that before or is this the first time

pfft not the interviewer getting read to shreds

wild theory before i keep going, based on the title "saved copy" and the "identity crisis", "existential horror", "temporal distortion" and "captivity" tags, im going to assume that this person going to therapys having the details of their life copied somewhere for something to replicate and replace them, and the doctors gonna attempt to get rid of them but obviously it didnt work. either that or the guy outside the office does something

as someone whos never done meditation before this is not encouraging me to start

ah office spaces, the worst of cosmic horror

wait did they get teleported or something

tbf if my taxi driver started driving completely the wrong way i'd assume the worst and start "exchanging words" too

oh my god was i right

wait is this copy based on their therapy, a version of themselves with no problems whatsoever? and is this gonna be a "there can only be one" type scenario?

oh wait no i forgot siblings exist

wait nvm them having the same name is weird

"dates and times" so this is where the temporal distortion comes in ig

yup

i'm sticking with the "rich-darrien is a copy trying to assimilate into og-darriens life" theory for now

yeah because thats not normal darrien, even if youre related no-one looks completely identical apart from glasses, teeth colour and a lack of a beer-gut

do they both think the other is the copy, or does sharron just not know?

oh god what is he hiding

does he beat up a real person every time hes upset

of course it was his father that makes sense

oh my god the sound design

oh my god he's the one who assimilated thats so cool

good for sharron i hope shes doing okay

off-topic but i love the way the voices get more real as the statement goes on then go back to their more robotic tone at the end

Post-Statement

as a celia fan i am eating well this week jeez

celia my dear what do you mean by that "not exactly the same though, it is?" girlie what have you done what are you hidinggg

alice!

who was playing the music in the background there?

as someones whos computing department in school consists of keyboard with never-before-discovered types of bacteria wedged between the keys thats valid

alice dyer i love you so much

ah the dyhard is dyharding

ah yes the mutual "i'm traumatised and i know you are too but i don't like you enough to give details on mine or ask about yours so we'll just sit and suffer in silence til the ice somehow breaks" dynamic

also colin mention woohoo i love the scottish man

the computer start up noise and power down noise at the beginning and end of every episode kind of makes me think that someone is watching all of this (maybe us, or more likely someone in-universe)

anyway that was fun, i'm doing this late but this was a nice way to spend my first proper off-day since finishing all my exams

#tmagp #the magnus protocol #tmagp spoilers #tmagp reaction #celia ripley #samama khalid #alice dyer #gwendolyn bouchard #colin becher

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gracechasitysleftshoe · 2 days

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I really wish people with public presences were given more space to be ambiguous and/or come out in their own time, or to just be private! Like yes we've seen some things, yes there is a good chance we will at some point or another see Angela come out as some flavour(s) of queer but if she does it should be on her own terms.

Like rpf is one thing, key word being fiction and remaining grounded in it being just that. Do I have my own private thoughts and feelings about it? Yeah. Just like I did before Kristen Stewart and Elliot Page came out, the first time (which maybe makes me sound ancient in Internet years, I've been around this block a few times, I've known I'm queer for 13 years, and I think about this a lot.) And like many it's because I look up to these people, I see myself in them or find them attractive. It makes it easy to project, especially when I myself have found so much freedom and empowerment in being very open and vocal about my queerness. But I have to imagine that feeling aware of external assumptions and pressures coming from the internet would really undercut that sense of freedom and empowerment.

Let's just ground ourselves in the fact that no matter how public someone makes their personality, they're still a normal vulnerable person like the rest of us. Just remember how private and vulnerable your own experiences in coming to terms with your own identity were. How it did or would've felt to have others assumptions added to the mix on top of your own processing. Like be excited when she does gay roles or what have you, but that can be done without placing labels, also a deep breath and just a little chill goes a long way. If she comes out that'll be the time to shower her with support, and I know we will good and well, but in the meantime, patience.

Honestly I could write a whole essay on this in a broader sense but it's Angela on my mind and this is a smosh/starkid blog

#angela giarratana #Smosh #starkid

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fun-with-colors · 7 months

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Random manga rec: Interviews with Monster Girls

Hey y’all, this is exactly what it says on the tin.

My icon is from a manga called Interviews with Monster Girls, which is a fairly short slice-of-life manga about a high school teacher in a world where figures from various world mythologies are actually real.

There are vampires, dullahans, snow women, succubi and incubi, oh my!

The title isn’t a euphemism - it’s literally about helping these monster girls (demi-humans or ‘demis’ as they’re called in the manga) to fit in and to share their stories to the world at large. It explores how things like “not having your head attached to your body” would impact your day-to-day life, how difficult it would be to eat or carry bags while dealing with that. It speaks to my experience as a student with a mental illness, and how I felt different from my peers in a way that was difficult to express.

There’s no over-the-top drama, it’s very heartwarming and sweet. The teacher doing the eponymous interviews is super understanding of everyone’s unique perspectives and is always supportive of the students.

There is a romance sub-plot, but it’s between two of the teachers and examines with a truly critical lens how being a succubus would make it difficult to form attachments with others. It’s a slow burn, and so cute!!

Anyways, this is all to say that you all should go read Interviews with Monster Girls. It’s got 11 volumes and they’re all out now. It’s got an anime, but I don’t think that anime ever reached the end?

#there is also a brief storyline where one of the students has a crush on the teacher #but as soon as he learns about it he gently puts her down #it’s the classic ‘someone respects me BECAUSE of who I am not despite it! is this feeling LOVE?!?’ thing #it made me a bit uncomfortable but they took it in such a good direction #there’s also a storyline where they discover that maybe just maybe it would be possible #for the dullahan’s head to be temporarily reattached to her body #so she can ‘live normally’#she tries it and decides nah she actually prefers it not being attached #it’s her normal and it’s what she’s used to and it’s her identity #interviews with monster girls #original oat

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loki-ioki · 8 months

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"I will help you get your memories back. To feel something again"

#this is a separate Voleeta AU than my normal one. If you dig far enough in my art tag you can see my rambles about him being Cynthia #but basically the real Cynthia goes missing/dies (she is his twin still) and in centuries long dissociative haze #ends up taking her place but obviously he was not mentally present for any of that so she has no idea how she ended up in this position and #doesn't know what to do. She doesn't remember who she used to be but can FEEL that something isn't right.#anywho. she ends up meeting Geeta and helping her find terapagos like the other (main) au but Geeta promises to help her uncover her #identity (or move on/start over if that's what she ends up wanting)#loki's art #pokemon #pokemon platinum #pokemon scarlet and violet #champion cynthia #pokemon cynthia #Volo #pokemon wielder volo #chairwoman geeta #champion geeta #Voleeta #IdealWishesShipping

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misspickman · 5 months

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very compelled by elsters gender both in a transmasc and transfem way bc well elster transmasc lesbian? beautiful wonderful 10/10. she is a robot whose body was made to fit the standards of what people consider a woman to look like, as is the case with most other replikas, so once she starts being treated more like a person of her own instead of just a worker robot, its fun to think of her chafing against it. on the other hand theres elster who was made to look like a woman/her neural pattern is copied from a woman, but is still treated like an object thats only there to do the job. shes referred to by others as 'it' in a dehumanizing way altho not purposely degrading bc they dont consider her a person enough to see this as cruel to her in any way. and slowly she ends up regaining her personhood and a concept of gender that feels right, as much as it can, considering the circumstances

#its complicated right. bc i dont think replikas would consider this much but also idk they are conditioned not to #elster being with ariane who disobeys the rules of what youre Not supposed to do with an elster replika clearly ends with her regaining mor #of a personal identity and willingness to like. make her own choices that arent orders #dont tell me about how this game is not about gender i know. its impossible for me to see a robot character and Not think about gender #especially in this case where theyre so clearly gendered #but still they are almost exclusively referred to as units and replikas and model names #i think falke is the one who actually gets she pronouns in reports? and most of it is by adler who is also a replika #anyway i think its very fun how all these robots are so clearly gendered but also not at the same time #which to me makes the concept of elster choosing to think of herself as a woman also very trans #she is made to look like one she is not meant to Be one #and its hard to say she would think of this bc we rarely get elster think of herself at all #theres two instances i can think of where she refers to herself #txt #signalis #yes u can use it pronouns in a normal not derogatory way but u know thats what was intended in the game

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maddy-ferguson · 11 months

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El and Will's characters get nothing being in a relationship with Mike. Idk why milvns think El breaking up with Mike and being an independent character would be bad for her when it is like one of the best things that will happen to her character. She is so lucky.

i don't feel like arguing because i'm obviously not gonna convince you of anything but i just wanna say that even if mike was the great boyfriend people thought seasons 1 and 2 set him up to be el still should never have been with him when she was coming out of a year of isolation and twelve years of abuse in the lab. it's literally a horror story like mike being one of the people to socialize her and her main introduction to the outside world is so gross her first boyfriend taught her the concept of privacy like ewww👎👎 it's a good story though. just not in the way mlvns think. and it would be gross even if mike had gone on to sign all his letter love, mike. and mlvn breaking up being good for el isn't even about el being independent in a girlboss she's better off not having a boyfriend ever because girls being single is feminism way it's about her identity being so tied to her relationship with mike because, again, he's the first person she formed an emotional bond with when she got out of the lab where she was abused constantly, and about her growing out of that relationship and having a sense of identity outside of it. it's so insane that people call you a misogynist for suggesting that she should have had other experiences before getting a boyfriend and just go well you can grow as a person while being in a relationship as if el had a normal upbringing when six months into their relationship she didn't even know what she liked! she didn't even know she was allowed to like things!!! besides being a hater what was hopper doing bro

#like yes girls don't have to choose between having an identity and being in a relationship. your three-year-old sister says more is a #sentence that's used to describe el five days before mike kisses her and sets the tone for the next three years of her life. also she's 14 #this is a middle school relationship like #otp: i guess it's not #i said the girlboss no bf thing even though a girl not having to have a (male) love interest is still a big deal and el being single at all #at the end of the show mlvn being a bad relationship mike being gay aside would still be a wow thing but like ykwim. maybe #but like even if you hate women and don't enjoy the el not being defined by the male figures in her life (brenner hopper mike) thing the #kid who didn't know anything about the real world being asked to a dance and not knowing what that meant and being kissed by a boy she #thought would be her brother five seconds prior to being kissed is just insane. she didn't know about privacy and her future bf taught it #to her #yes i'm always bringing up the privacy thing. because it's the best example of how messed up it is #or would've been (well no. is) like mike is a normal and yk good person but it just shows how much influence he had on her and how much #power he had over her. well it's just bsy junior bpy #isn't it crazy that i have mike haters following me #ask

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the-fading-stars · 11 months

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Aro who? Totally back in love

#fall out boy #lifeupdate #ok but this is my first crush in 7 years maybe 8 #i'm bad at keeping track of time #still identity as aro cause it's a spectrum and i wouldn't want a classic romantic relationship with the person i have a crush on #i'm thinking seeing her like every two to four weeks ocasionally hugging maybe some headpats cooking together sleeping next to each other #actually i want us to be friends but just put a different label on it so it feels more normal to talk about how great she is extensively #is that what a qpr is?#no idea #anyways kate if you're reading this would you mind if i called you my girlfriend? wouldn't change a thing except for the label tho #also this is tagged as fall out boy because it's a pete wentz reference

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fagmegumi · 1 year

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Conversion therapy? In MY emdr with a clueless cis woman ? Its more likely than you think

#this👌🏻close to dropping my therapist forever I swear #i was telling her how my parents have acted my whole life like my body belongs to them and chose all my haircuts and clothes until age 14 #and still act like its a fucking national tragedy every time i change my hair or get a tattoo or something #and how ive had a terror and disgust at the idea of pregnancy since childhood so much so that i used to have nightmares about it at like 5 #and shes like well i need you to carefully consider if your desire to ‘change your body’ and ‘masculinize it’ is truly YOUR desire or if #you just want to make gestures to rebel and reclaim your possession of your body🥺#like wow youre so smart did you perchance read freud? I never considered the idea that events that have occurred to me might have affected #my identity behaviors and desires!#and like of course theres overlap of course these things are related. but even if its that way even if worst case scenario we do a Psyche #Deep Dive and find out that i was redacted as a kid or whatever. WHAT would that even change about me now!!!#WHY shouldn’t i be able to do things that would materially improve my life by giving me a measure of psychological peace even if i might #not want those things in a hypothetical alternate reality where nothing happened to me . why do i have to be sane and normal in order to #make decisions about my body and my life.#god. we struggling girlies🤪

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tragedykery · 1 year

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babe wake up new oc lore just dropped (aka long ramble about hira under the cut)

the thing about hira is. she grew up in an orphanage in the western earth kingdom. she was left there as a baby with nothing but her name. she doesn’t know who her parents were, where she’s from, and when her efforts to figure this out prove fruitless, it hurts. she longs for family, for knowledge and identity and culture, only spurred on by the feeling of alienation from (and perhaps jealousy towards) her peers.

(and maybe she conflates those different types of longing, maybe she thinks if she discovers what nation her parents were from she’ll find a new family there.)

so when she finds out she can airbend, she’s overjoyed. she throws herself into learning everything she can about the bending and the culture. she makes plans to go to the temples when she gets off the ship. when she gets there, she’ll finally have a family. she’ll finally be at home.

and that is one of the reasons she struggles so much when she realises she actually likes it on the ship. she likes being with these people, these pirates who have actually begun to feel like some sort family to her. the ship feels like home. and that’s why, eventually, she stays.

(and also, she’s scared. she’s scared they won’t accept her at the temples, that she isn’t air nomad enough. that she doesn’t know enough. she’ll go, just later. not yet.)

she stays, and keeps learning. she learns to meditate, to write air nomad script and speak air nomad languages, to cook air nomad recipes, all under the tutelage of sita (though for the last one, chusak helps too). she’s almost a bending prodigy.

and then she discovers she’s the avatar. and she refuses to believe it.

because being the avatar would mean being not really an air nomad. it would mean a duty to the world, and with that, an inability to fully comply with air nomad philosophy. the avatar can’t stay detached from worldly matters or choose not to harm.

so she denies it.

eventually, with the help of her friends (her family) she learns to separate the concepts of family and culture and identity and bending. she learns her worth doesn’t depend on those things, that she can be multiple things at once, that she doesn’t have to choose. she can do her duty as the avatar and still be an air nomad.

can bend any of the elements and speak both the languages of the eastern air temple and a small village in the west of the earth kingdom and prefer her tea the way it’s served in tea houses decked out in green but prefer her bread the way it’s eaten by nuns and have it be okay. she doesn’t have to choose or change or be perfect to be loved. her family is a motley pirate crew made up of people who find their origins in all four corners of the globe, and they celebrate all their wonderful differences.

so indeed, I think more than anything, wind in the sails is a story about identity & culture & personal growth.

#one thing about me is I am normal about my ocs #elli rambles #oc tag #she does go to temples eventually. but with a healthier mindset and reasoning #she doesn’t feel like she has to prove something (herself/her worth/her identity) anymore #and she doesn’t do it because she longs for a sense of belonging and love #I am not wording this well but ugh. going insane about my own characters #wind in the sails #hira #the birates #oc rambles #I think part of her arc is definitely also realising she can describe herself as being from the town she grew up in?#she doesn’t need to be ‘actually From There’ ethnically speaking to consider it her home. just growing up there is enough #I think the main question the fic would ask (if I had written more than five sentences of it) would just be like. what is identity?#especially cultural/national identity #taituk & li being mixed is very deliberate. as is nisha being from a group of nomads that don’t really consider themselves as being from an #of the four nations. as is the crew being from different parts of the same nations #with the exception of mallik who’s from the same tribe as taituk but that again is deliberate #taituk not using specifically water tribe or southern earth kingdom weapons & lying about their name & naming their ship in ‘common’#instead of in fantasy vietnamese or yup’ik (to protect their family & other people from those ethnic groups)#sita being an air nomad and growing up in the temples but not being a bender. etc #anyway. being normal #none of this is proofread btw love & light

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vyrion · 1 year

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im thinking about the magical girl au againSomeone get me out of here

#from the deep dark #ineed a name for it. i cant just keep calling it ''magical girl au''#im tags rambling about it because im tired and bored and have things to do tomorrow that i dnot want to do #its a riptide au (because of Course it is) mostly based on the madoka concept of magical girls #because i think its cool and also havent really consumed that much media of this genre #gillion has practically forgotten his normal identity and has fully embraced being one.the others haven't ever seen him out of costume-#-partially because he doesn't remember what normal life is supposed to be like #the black rose used to be a group that fell apart #chip wasnt formally part of it but he often snuck along even though he didnt have the abilities and got told off for it #jay's the most recent of the three to make her wish #she's searching for her sister and mildly rebelling against her family #which has some sort of unnatural tie to the ''evils of mana'' <- theres more definition to this i havent thought of yet #idk this au is so silly to me i love just rotating it. no plot just shennagagins #rmgau #<- temp tag i guess

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sanstropfremir · 1 year

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I remember when you once said when explaining your thoughts on sm as an institution and using aespa as an example that there were around 4 steps or criteria. And I think I'm actually seeing it 👀 with aespa I'm starting to see them show their personalities more which makes me think of minho from shinee saying in his first year he was supposed to look cold and not really speak.

Also this is still related to the idea of a persona but I think that's another reason I got kinda meh about bt*. Bc I watched rm's mv and I felt more for the featured artist's vocals than him. This pushing of authenticity is nice and certainly welcome but it can feel dull and ironically not authentic anymore instead feeling more corporate or forced. I would talk about how bt* and bighit's authentic "concept" takes advantage of the already dangerous para social relationship between fans and idols but that'll be an essay so i won't lol

i'm not gonna say that my theorized lil step system was right bc we're never going to actually know, but it always takes a bit of time for rookies to get a feel for how the industry works post debut and where the personal and professional lines of how much they want to portray. so now that they've been out and around the block doing stuff, it makes sense that they're getting more comfortable. it's more of an experience thing than anything else.

not to harp again on the general principle but the more money used to make something, the less 'authentic' it feels. because the finer the polish you put on something, the less like the real world it looks, and the less 'relatable' it is. and it also makes it very hard to build a signature style, unless you're doing something that has a strong aesthetic. like the sort of soft indie type aesthetic that rm is trying to do with that mv just point blank doesn't work when you have that much money. the reason that that indie aesthetic works is because it's shot on shitty cameras with $12 and a paperclip, not on a red camera with vfx budget. when you're trying to go that low key with aesthetics, you have to be able to show the flaws in what you're doing, because there's nothing else to visually help you establish that style. nothing about that mv looks real, and you need it to look real to the viewer if you want it to come across as authentic. the quality of production that hybe CAN do is better suited for large scale spectacles that can back a really strong and distinctive aesthetic that needs that kind of money to pull off in the first place. and not to pit groupmates against each other but i will anyways bc it's funny, but jhope has a SIGNIFICANTLY better understanding of that.

#also WOW that vocalist has a crazy voice like???? damn nobody is gonna stand up to that sorry bud #oh dont worry i've already hit on their fucked up parasocial fan thing in those big asks i did like a year ago #they have like a special kind of hell parasocial relationship its really something #kpop questions #875 #aespa w #actually i literally just saw this principle in action at a friend's show today #she did a residency that had a bunch of funding behind it and felt like it stripped the gritty nature of her work #and what she was trying to portray out of it #normally you don't really see that when you're at the sad starving artist level like us so it was really weird to see #important to clarify here that money =/= corporate #you can polish the edges off something enough to strip it of life but not make it 'corporate' looking #and you need to have a REALLY strong sense of what you're doing in order to maintain a visual identity through that #and well. not everyone is skilled enough to do that #see above #text #answers #things that have the 'indie' look have that look mostly bc of technological and material limitations. not because of ideas #if he wanted that mv to actually look good they should have shot it on a cellphone from 2015 and cut all that vfx nonsense #like wtf was that drone fireworks shot?? who wants to see that???

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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youtube

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

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abyssruler · 9 months

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roses are red, violets are blue, lynette is so done with the two of you

lyney x gn!reader

lynette thinks fontaine’s worst kept secret isn’t how neuvillette wears blue underwear or how the hydro archon loves a good drama, no, fontaine’s worst kept secret is lyney’s massive crush on you and how everyone and their grandmother know except you.

comedy, pining lyney, lynette being so done

Lyney’s frowning.

Most people would find it an odd expression on him, used to having him direct dazzling smiles and playful laughter their way. But Lynette isn’t just anyone, and the sight of Lyney frowning is hardly a rare phenomenon within the privacy of their household.

Freminet’s usually Lyney’s choice of victim for whatever nonsense he’s managed to build himself up in that head of his, but Freminet’s busy doing errands and Lynette is unfortunately the only person within vicinity that Lyney trusts with his secret—which isn’t even a secret by this point, people have been making bets on how long it would take you to realize that Lyney’s been pining over you since forever.

Case in point: Lyney frowning over two identical flowers. She doesn’t need to be a mind reader to know that her brother is having a midlife crisis over which flower to give you.

Lynette thinks he should just man up and confess. Preferably within the next week or so, otherwise she’d lose her bet.

“Lynette, which one is more eye-catching, the crimson one,” he holds up the flower in his right hand, then he raises the other one, “or the maroon one?”

Lynette gives him the deadest stare she can muster. “They’re the same color.”

“Oh, sister, have you no taste?” Lyney tuts, pouting at her for a moment before returning to that constipated look as he squinted at the ‘crimson’ and ‘maroon’ flowers. Talk about being delusional.

“(Y/N)’s not gonna care whether the rose is crimson or maroon or red,” she tells him. You’d probably accept a dead flower if it came from Lyney, with that starry-eyed look you always got whenever he so much as glances your way. Lynette’s not one to judge other people’s taste too harshly, but she does wonder what you see in her overdramatic and annoying brother.

Ah, well. They do say love makes people blind. Hopefully not literally though, Lynette’s not looking forward to performing shows alone because Lyney got blinded by his love for you—though if you asked Lynette, she’d tell you it wasn’t love so much as obsession. Only someone insane would spend hours picking out flowers and calling them ‘maroon’ and ‘crimson’. It’s just red.

Lynette squints at him. “And since when were you interested in the meaning of flowers?”

“Well, I suppose you could say I like to dabble in other pursuits.” Lyney gives her a cheeky grin.

“Right…” He’s clearly losing his mind.

“Red roses symbolize true love, though rainbow roses in particular pertain to passion, and…” He trails off, eyes blinking in astonishment. She can practically see the lightbulb appearing on top of his head.

With a flick of his wrists, the ‘crimson’ and ‘maroon’ roses disappear. Lynette watches him warily, wondering what kind of outlandish idea has formed in that head of his.

But he doesn’t elaborate more, only shoots a wink at her and says, “I’ve got a great idea.”

✧

His great idea, as it turns out, is to corner you in an alleyway and make it rain rainbow roses around you as he asked you out on a date, all while Lynette is crouched on the roof, dumping sacks of rainbow roses and vindictively hoping one of them stabs Lyney in the eye. No such luck.

You, as the ever-crazy romantic that you are, are awestruck and amazed by what he’s done instead of weirded out like how a normal person would be. With an eager smile and a twinkle in your eye, you accept the rose in Lyney’s hand and say yes when he asks you to meet him for dinner tomorrow. Lynette wants to barf, but settles for dumping another sack of flowers on top of the two of you.

And if she uses a little bit of anemo to direct a few petals to Lyney’s face? Well, you removing a petal sticking to his cheek and having your fingers linger there for a few moments wasn’t part of the plan (the plan being: embarrass her brother by having him choke on a petal while he’s speaking), but she can’t entirely begrudge the result. Not when Lyney looks like he’s about to have a meltdown with just one touch from you. Good blackmail material right there.

Lynette’s happy that the two of you have finally gotten your heads off your asses and are actually going on a date. Though mostly she’s happy about the amount of mora heading her way soon.

She’ll have to thank Freminet for telling her about the bet about you and Lyney. Maybe she can start a new bet on when the two of you are getting married—probably soon, if the lovestruck look on Lyney’s face is anything to go by. She hopes he won’t be crazy enough to propose on the second date, because you’d certainly be crazy enough to accept if he did.

Oh, well. Lynette will put a bet on one month just in case.

#look i haven’t done the archon quest yet #so i don’t have a good feel yet of their characters #but i’m sticking with this characterization!!#genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #lyney x reader #gn reader #lynette

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rindomness · 1 year

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what if i just. completely revamped asha's design actually.

#what if i was so normal about her design and used it to communicate #her coming to terms w freedom and how she doesnt have a solid sense of identity #and gains it through her story as a direct consequence of azar's presence in her life #and what if i used it as an opportunity to give her more flowy skirts.#not during the story when that might be a tripping hazard speaking as someone who owns flowy skirts but like after #aagecl #ppl are talking about artfight already in blinkshark and its making me have design thonks oops

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etherealkissed88 · 1 month

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how i manifest when i feel anxious •°. *࿐

i decide i have what i want…

when i feel anxiety -> i let it pass while knowing its only a human reaction

◦ since i am beyond just a human (i am limitless imagination/self), i know any anxiety is below me and it has nothing to do with my limitless self. i have exactly what i decided i have, regardless of any anxiety.

know anxiety usually comes from a fear of failure

◦ so, i cannot limit myself based on what i see or what i negatively assume my future will look like bc i am always beyond the 3d, no matter what feelings/anxiety my human self experiences.

◦ i become indifferent/i dont care about what i see or what i assume i will see because i know everything comes together in the 3d once i change self/know its done. fact: everything always comes together and works out in the end. being indifferent to the 3d = being indifferent to emotions, anxiety and everything that doesnt serve you.

dont fight it, dont avoid it, tackle it head on

◦ acknowledge you are experiencing anxiety bc you are. yes it can feel like shit but it doesnt have to affect who you are being (whatever version of self you are embodying). again, i can choose to be indifferent to this anxiety. you dont have to be scared of the anxiety. it is a natural human response. cry if you need to, let it all out. dont try to suppress it bc that will only come to bite you back in the ass, believe me.

◦ take care of your mental health in whatever ways necessary. when i used to experience anxiety, i used to take walks in the park, clear my head, meditate, express myself and my emotions through art and journaling, etc. remember nothing you do (or feel) in the 3d has to affect who you are being/your state.

"how can i still have anxiety yet still be a desired version of me?"

anxiety has no affect on anything unless you allow it to change your identity. you are the one with power, the anxiety is only an experience, similar to breathing in oxygen and using our sense of touch; its all neutral. when you start surrendering to the anxiety, you are creating and accepting negative stories that you create based on the feeling of anxiety. allowing that anxious feeling to change your state/identity is surrendering to something you view as more "powerful" than you. stop transforming that anxiety into a state that you embody based on the false, negative stories u imagine.

remember a 3d experience or anxious feelings doesnt have to influence who you are being. an example: a model who knows (fulfilled) that she is graceful and beautiful can have anxiety about doing her catwalk. the anxiety is normal, she can experience the symptoms of anxiety (shortness of breath, dry mouth, shaking) but her core identity/state is still a graceful model. the anxiety is only a temporary feeling. usually when we experience these feelings, they occupy all of our attention in that moment which is why it seems so scary but in reality, its not that big a deal. know that anxiety is just a feeling. you are safe. you can still experience shitty feelings while knowing you are a bad bitch!

you dont always identify with everything you experience. for example, a lot of people experience good things and still identify as people who are unworthy of good things. so its really up to you to choose what to identify with.

i know my only job is knowing its done

◦ if i just decided its done, as the operant power, as i say goes, therefore its done. so my job is done. anxiety is part of the 3d, not my limitless self, imagination. so i can be indifferent and experience it without identifying with it, the same way people manifest what they desire while experiencing their shitty circumstances daily (because they do not identify with those shitty experiences).

◦ ive heard/experienced situations were we know its done yet we cried and felt like shit, and what we wanted still manifested into the 3d. bc anxiety is only a feeling. do not allow your feelings to take hold of your state, but if it does, its never the end of the world... just get back in the state. 3d shit/anxiety doesnt have to intervene with who you are being/what you identify with.

kisses, jani ☆

#etherealkissed🎀#etherealkissed #law of assumption #loa blog #manifesting #loassumption #neville goddard #edward art #imagination creates reality #loastates #loass states #loa assumptions #law of manifestation #master manifestor

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absolutely-esme · 4 months

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What do you mean he's not eldritch?

What if all of the members of the Bat Family other than Tim Drake were secretly eldritch abominations?

They all work very hard at pretending to be human, and they've even gotten pretty good at passing. They can even mostly avoid the uncanny valley when in their civilian identities. There was a heck of a learning curve, but they've gotten things figured out for the most part.

Enter: Tim Drake

Weird, poorly socialized, probably autistic Tim Drake

The Bats think they've encountered a fellow eldritch being in disguise, and one that seems like he could use some help blending in. Naturally, they're quick to welcome him into their fold. Jason is delighted to take his turn at being a big brother mentor.

It takes a comedically long time for anyone to realize something's up because there is an absurd amount of overlap between stuff you need to know for masking and stuff you need to know to pass as human.

Meanwhile, Tim is amazed that the Bats have apparently decided he's cool enough to hang out with. It's like something out of his daydreams. They even have good advice for him on problems he hadn't known how to ask about. They are so patient and understanding about it, too. They never get annoyed with him for not already knowing. They also seem to be okay with the bits of weirdness he can't change.

Just weird kid Tim getting bundled into an incredibly helpful and supportive found family of eldritch entities. They're all going to get a good grade in human-ing, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve.

...

I imagine the Bats are various different kinds of eldritch abominations because they're still adopted. They look wildly different when not in human form.

Bruce is a mass of... shadows? Smoke? Something dark and formless that shifts and flows in different ways depending on his mood.

Dick kind of looks like a pile of owls that is also somehow a single body.

Barbara is a spiral galaxy with stars that are also eyes somehow?

Jason is a solid-looking mass of muscle with six strong legs, a thick coat of shaggy hair, a mouth that opens much further along his body than it seems like it should, and even more teeth than you'd expect a mouth that size to have.

Stephanie Brown is kind of like an incredibly dense storm system with purple glitter.

Cassandra is a silhouette through which undiscovered nebulae can be seen. What she is a silhouette of depends on her mood.

Tim, they have only ever seen in his meticulously well-crafted human form. He's really good at that part even if he needed some help with the behavioral bits.

Damian is half human. Talia saw a mass of living darkness trying really hard to pretend to be a man and decided she was into that.

...

Dick: So, eye contact is actually pretty simple once you have the formula figured out. You need to cycle between looking at the other person and looking at something else at the appropriate frequency. If you look at them too much it will come across as staring. If you look away for too long they'll think you're not paying attention to them. You'll need to experiment to figure out the appropriate frequency.

Tim: *frets*

Jason: You don't have to look straight at their eyes, just in the general direction of their face.

Tim: Oh! I can do that!

...

I think Eldritch Bruce having history with the league of assassins in a markedly less inentional way than Canon would be funny. Like, you'd think an encounter between an eldritch abomination and a cult would be deliberate on someone's part, but no.

Bruce was still young and unskilled at differentiating between normal and abnormal human behavior.

#dc #batman #batfam #found family #tim drake #jason todd #dick grayson #stephanie brown #eldritch au #Eldritch Jason Todd #Eldritch Dick Grayson #Eldritch Stephanie Brown #Eldritch Barbara Gordon #Eldritch Damian Al Ghul #Eldritch Bruce Wayne #Eldritch batfamily #what do you mean he's not eldritch au

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