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the-cat-and-the-birdie · 7 months

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Alice 'Allie' Parkington is WonderSpider!

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Miguel: One year and four months ago, I devised the formula for inter-dimensional travel, allowing me to open portals across the multiverse. I created an elite stri-

Alice: Oh, Okay! -

[Alice is the result of a 'Adapt-A-Spider' Challenge, where you adapt a pre-existing character into a Spider! You can see more of my fun Spidersona challenges HERE]

(Also HUGE THANKS to @fairytalespider who made the OG SpiderSnow!)

Gwen Stacy isn't the only blonde who knows about miraculously falling through wormholes.

Except Allie got sent to the universe with talking animals, and a maniacal queen with of taste for beheadings. Not that she's complaining. Not when the tea parties are so delightful~

At 7 years old Alice Parkington found a white waist-coated rabbit, on a hurry to who knows where -

And she followed him, fell down a hole, and never came back.

Origins:

[Alice's world is a mix of the book's portrayal, the cartoon's, and Tim Burton's (though I haven't seen the movies). Her story begins at the end of book - a similar ending to the cartoon movie, but instead she doesn't wake up.]

After losing a game of croquet to The Red Queen of Hearts, Alice is sent to the dungeons, awaiting her beheading on the Queen's orders. That is, until she finds an enchanted Spider in her cell, sent by an ally. When she's bitten, it gives her all the power of Wonderland - and binds her there forever. After escaping The Red Queen's Death Row, Alice was adopted by the woman who helped free her - The kind but exiled The White Queen or Marmoreal, aka Her Aunt Mirana.

Now The Blue Princess of Marmoreal, Alice is next in line for the throne, and the web-swinging protector of Tugley Woods, Wonderland. She spends her days fighting against the tyrannical and murderous rule of The Red Queen of Hearts, and The Court of Cards. With The Mad Hatter as her martyred Uncle Ben - Alice calls Wonderland her home, though she's always left questioning what's real and what isn't. At this point, she's accepted she'll never know the answer. So when she's recruited for Spider Society, it's just another rabbit hole to go down, and another adventure to fall into. On campus she's known as WonderSpider, and she's a lot more powerful (and ruthless) than you'd think.

Design and Personality:

Alice is a lot less sugar and a bit more spice, with her personality taking after the book (moreso than the movies).

Alice is bubbly and independent. She's as curious as a cat and as chatty as a bird. And she's all about asking questions and finding her own way in the world.

She's loves tea parties and foraging and making crazy experiements in the Hatter's workshop. And now that he's gone, she still finds herself in there, cooking up another magical sweet or Victorian style gadget. When she's not doing that, she's at The White Queens side, begrudgingly taking (literally) nonsensical etiquette classes. She isn't afraid to speak up for herself and others. And once she makes her mind up, it's settled.

Despite what some may think, she's isn't an entire lunatic. She's hasn't gone Wonderland Mad yet.

Even since a young girl, Alice has always been known for asking questions - trying to find the sense in nonsense before coming to a conclusion. She's great at picking up on details, and thinking outside the box. And she's always the one to keep a level head, no matter what the circumstances. Doom is not assured when reality is subjective. She's as logical as she is loopy, and although some may think there's nothing going on between her ears, they are sorely mistaken.

She always wears her glasses. She needs them to see.

Or rather, she needs them to see correctly. Having a cause of The Mads, taking off her glasses distorts her vision of the room into a psychedelic and disorienting wonderland version itself - which hurts. She keeps them on always. Though they can be knocked off during battle. Like other Spider-people - The lenses squint, blink, and emote. They have a permanent and consistently moving patterns and colors. Between blinks, the design may change, the swirls changing color or direction. Sometimes the words she's saying may flash over them for emphasis, and they can contain anything from exclamation points to tie dye.

Alice is a de facto genius.

An expert chemist, Alice has mastered dozens of recipes and chemistry formulas using the vegetation in Wonderland. She's cracked the code to rabbit holes, and has an amazing affinity for science and theoretical theory. And if she doesn't understand a certain law of physics or something, she can just choose to ignore it. Literally.

Powers & Abilities:

Hobie told Alice that laws are oppressive. She agreed, told him she hates the laws of physics - then started floating to the ceiling like a balloon. Needless to say, reality doesn't really work for Alice. And she cannot control it.

But no matter what her misfortune, though - She'll always say 'Oh, dear.'

Reality Warp:

Wonderland has side effects. Alice can grow and shrink at will, but once she's there, she can't go back. When she wants, she can manifest rabbit holes to Wonderland on any flat surface, but she doesn't know where they are - so she always falls into them. Her tears are huge, and they flood any room. And for some reason, she's obsessed with cookies. It she sees one, she'll eat it. It doesn't matter if it says 'Eat Me' or not. If you hand her something and tell her to drink, she will. It's the one thing she won't question, although she should know better. She'll read the label, and if it's not clearly labeled bleach or poison, she's drinking it. If it's not those two things, it must be safe right?

The Power of Imagination:

Like Spider-Ham has the Super-Slapstick ability, Alice has the Power of Imagination on her side. If she can make logic of it or believe it, then there is a random chance it will happen. If the team is looking for a way past a locked door, Alice may say 'If only there were a mousehole somewhere here. Mice are such scampers, they can get into anywhere!' There will probably be a 1/4 chance of a mouse running by, leading them to a cartoon like mousehole she can shrink and go through. However, Alice can't will it to happen. She can't be asking or hoping for it, and the thought has to be completely innocent and 'wonderous' for it to work. The ability can also be compounded, with multiple unlikely things happening rapid fire - however this is less likely and HIGHLY dangerous if done in other universes, and is likely to cause an anomaly. Plus everyone else involved goes a tad bit 'loopy' for a bit.

This ability only works outside of Wonderland, and it was discovered by Miguel.

When Alice met Miguel, she began to question his interesting suit, and so she asked. Miguel began to explain to her, but confused, Alice said 'Well, that's nonsensical. Surely you can't wear light like fabric. If that were true, I could pull this right off you.' - And then she did. And suddenly she was holding his suit in her hands as if it were made of fabric, and Miguel was there in his underwear.

Alice's response: 'Oh dear.'

Chesire Mode:

When surrounded by enough chaos or kinetic energy, Alice can go Chesire Mode, and really goes off the bend. She experiences full Wonderland Madness - similar to the Hatter, and gains the ability to unravel herself and turn invisible. Her voice begins to echo, creating a disorienting and hallucination-like affect. Doing this is known to cause madness, but it affects everyone in the room.

Equipment:

WebShooters: Alice uses mechanical Web-Shooters created by her and The Mad Hatter. Her webs are silly string and streamers. 'Bow'-nus Arms: Alice's waist ribbon is extendable like Mr.Fantastic's limbs, serving essentially as a second set of arms. However, when it's off of her, it's much more similar to Doctor Strange's cape, having a mind and personality of it's own. She can take it off and ask it do it, and it'll go off and (try it's best) to do it, just like a snake. It's name is David Bowie. She does not know who David Bowie is - it's just a coincidence: it's family name is Bow-ie, and David is a common name.

Random Facts:

Alice hangs out with a lot of the 'Eccentric' and Mini Spiders - She likes others from cartoons or fairytales, or anyone made for whimsy.

And she likes spending her time small.

She has a crush on Lego Spider-Man. She shrinks to be with him lol

He naturally finds her a little offputting, they're NOT a thing but she wishes (sis he's literal plastic)

Alice's best friends are SpiderPetal, SpiderSnow (@fairytalespider), SpiderFairy (@stardust948) and Spider-Ham.

Since they all live in either a woodland area, a cartoon, or both, those are usually who she's with

Though she only goes small around people she trusts - but never someone like Miguel. In fact, with Miguel, she does the opposite.

When Miguel is in the room, Alice prefers to grow 'full size' as in... taking up the whole room giantess style.

She says it helps, because 'It makes Mr.O'hara look like a little toy soldier.'

With the size of his lair, she can often grow taller faster than he can get lower - so he'll stay up there, and she'll grow to meet his eye.

She can decide when to stop growing or shrinking, just not when she'll turn back.

This power is transferable. Alice's wonderland powers still work elsewhere, and so her cookies and drinks do too.

Alice can only keep 1 cookie and 1 drink on her at one time, never more, it'll always be ruined.

She can use these to either extend her state, or have someone shrink or grow along with her.

But once she uses the one of each item, she can't get more until she returns home and makes more.

HOWEVER. HOWEVER - Alice is down for deals.

If you come to her world and ask for some cookies or potions, she'll give it to you. But there's a mandatory tea party involved, and the only payment she asks is that you bring sweets for the guests - Vegan please!!

(Her favorite is angel food cake, after cookies of course)

Those aren't the only ones - she has dozens of sophisticated concoctions for any need - floating and weightlessness, invisibility, even the ability to mimic voices perfectly -

And just the same, she's able to carry one of each when outside of Wonderland.

A frequent customer of hers is Hobie. He puts the potions to work - plus he makes the best vegan coconut macaroons.

Oh - also DO NOT Drink her tea though - it's made with Wonderland Tea Leaves....Great for a good time, horrible for bedtime.

Despite not knowing her specific age - Alice is a young adult - and she works at The Society.

Her Uncle Hatter was a master chemist, alchemist, magician, chef - and dozens of other things. And for years, Alice studied under him.

Originally, Miguel assumed all of this knowledge would be non-transferable nonsense, but - wrong.

Alice is one of the leading scientists at The Society - with a concentration in Multiversal Physics, studying everything from the visual styles of universes, the path between universes, and differences in time.

She'll often say something, only to get dismissed by Miguel.

But Lyla will cut him off, telling him that scientifically, Alice IS making sense.

It's just that because her world is totally backwards, the ideas she has to describe her thoughts are backwards too.

After a while, she becomes one of the main people to write the updates and programs for the watches, working with Miguel as her boss.

She's like a bop-it, full of weird and very useless quirks.

If her feet get wet, they make the duck waddle sound when she walks.

If she hits her head, it makes the TikTok 'Boink' sound. She runs and it makes the Flintstones noise.

If she stubs her toe or gets hurt on something tiny, she'll scream like Tom The Cat.

She burps bubbles (like the soap kind) and her sneezes sound like one of those party straw thingies.

Sometimes her Wonderland powers play tricks on her. She'll be like 'I'm outta here!!' then walk into a looney toons wall. And she's so embarrassed cause the cartoon noises make it so much worse fhgsuigdf

Sometimes when she tries to run she stays in one place for a second before the running kicks in (like a cartoon) - and Miguel just grabs her and she's like 'Dratz, I was trying to get away.'

She enjoys hanging out with Hobie, though she does not understand him at all.

Like, she's British too - did I mention she's British, cause she's from Victorian England -

But she has no opinion on his ideology because it's ???? lost on her

He's like 'This is a metaphor for capitalism' and she'd be like 'I don't know what that is.'

He's like 'count your blessings'.

But Hobie LOVES that Alice doesn't stick to the rules -

and that she gives the middle finger to the laws of physics by just existing

He's like 'That's so cool, what you just did. Real Metal.'

She's like 'I suppose I am just a container, filled with slowly decaying food - so in that way, I am quite like a fridge, which is cool and made of metal-'

And he's like 'what are you talking about-'

And they mainly hangout because they're both lazy.

Alice is tirrreeed of all these weird physics rules and new technology and non talking cutlery.

She'd much prefer to take a nap, or wander off, of have a tea party, or do ANYTHING that isn't work. Same girl same

And that's it! Most of it, I'll probably maybe maybe not write a post about her joining the society and how it completely warps her perception of reality because she's been trying to get home for so long, she doesn't even know if her home exists then there's this new society through ANOTHER wormhole but she still can't get home-

Oh and before I go, her intro art is inspired by Qveen Herby's single Abracadabra!

Yeah. If you made it this far THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME UR TIME! Thank you so so much for entertaining me I MEAN IT THANK YOU I KNOWI POST SO MANY OCS AND IT'S KINDA OVERWHELMING SORRY AAHHH MY BRAIN CANT STOP I CANT FOCUS HELP

Anyway I'm normal

HERE HOBIE

Bye.

#NO PROOFREAAADDDD #spiderman #atsv #spider man #marvel #across the spiderverse #spidersonas #spidersona #alice in wonderland #disney #disney movies #disney princesses #technically?????#chesire cat #the mad hatter #UHHHHH #YEAH

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paperstorm · 25 days

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Hate to admit it but I’m jealous of og 911. Not only are they getting new episodes now, with very high ratings, but they already know they’re renewed for season 8. We still have to wait 6 months for our new episodes, a hiatus of nearly a year and a half, and we have no idea what’s happening after that and if we’re getting a season 6. Also Tim Minear has abandoned us - where are our still Tim?! And they’re probably getting the couple they’ve always wanted to get together which I can’t help but worry will mean Tarlos will get looked over and not cared for as much by the showrunners anymore

I think it's totally understandable to be anxious about whether we'll get another season, the strike made everything very uncertain. And it's fine to feel jealous, that's a normal human emotion and feel what you feel. But listen. We have one of the most beautiful queer love stories I've ever seen on network TV, the kind of story that even 10 years ago would have seemed completely impossible. We have two canon queer characters played by queer actors who seem at every turn to be aware of the magnitude of that responsibility. We got to watch them hook up for the first time, watch them fall in love, say "I love you", call each other baby, call each other SOULMATES. We got to see them grow together, to see them crying in each other's arms, we got them making a home together, we got angsty romantic hospital bedside pining, we got a 3am proposal. "This man is my heart", "he's the one", "Carlos is my person", "you're a miracle, TK Strand. My miracle". We got a whole wedding!!!! Wedding vows!! Rings exchanged! A multicultural ceremony! A tropical honeymoon!! Comparing LS to any other show because they have something that we don't yet, like confirmation of another season, is natural and I get that. But nobody gets absolutely every single thing they want, and all things considered, our show has SO much, so very many wonderful things over the course of four seasons that the fandoms of literally hundreds of other shows would kill to have.

#911ls asks

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hitthebooksposts · 11 months

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Cinnamon Snail

An @omgzineplease fic preview (Zine releases for free June 5th)...

Ships: Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmerman, Larissa "Lardo" Duan/Shitty Knight

Rating: G

Summary:

It's ten years since graduation. While looking after Lardo and Shitty's new bundle of joy, Jack starts to wonder what the rest of his life with Bitty might look like.

(Preview under the cut)

“En kop kaffe og en kanelsnegl, tak,” Shitty said as clearly as he could, hoping his American accent didn’t mangle his Danish. The café he’d taken Lardo to was in the center of Copenhagen, and he was getting by on the smattering of Danish he’d picked up from a month of language app study.

While watching Danish crime dramas during late-night feeds with Timmy, he'd become acutely aware of how one part of Denmark pronounced words varied vastly from the other side of the country. In some ways, it made trying to learn Danish through an app a hit-and-miss exercise.

“Am I right that the translation of ‘kanelsnegl’ is literally ‘cinnamon snail’?” Lardo asked as they finished ordering. They were both having the same, though Lardo would be doctoring her coffee with ample spoons of sugar once it arrived.

“You would be,” Shitty replied with a smile. It was twelve hours and counting since they’d landed in Denmark and as he waited for his cinnamon roll and coffee, Shitty tried to ignore the worry attempting to crawl up the back of his spine.

The trip marked their first prolonged absence from Timmy since he’d been born nine months ago. And Timmy was the first anything that Shitty found he couldn’t be completely chill about. I guess that’s what it means to be a parent, Shitty thought as the coffee bean grinder in the corner kicked into gear. Constantly worrying and hoping for the best.

“How do you think Bitty and Jack are doing?” Lardo asked, pushing back her long black hair. The undercut was fresh and only two days old. It wasn’t that Lardo was vain, Shitty had found in their marriage, it was that she liked meeting her preferred sense of style as closely as possible at all times.

Shitty flashed back to a week prior when pureed carrot and sweet potato had become spattered over the suit jacket he had returned home wearing that day.

“I’m sure they’re doing fine.” Shitty looked at his watch and estimated it was just coming up to four in the morning back in Rhode Island. He tried not to think about the jet lag that was still waiting to hit him.

#check please #omg check please #omgcp #omgcp fanfic #omg check please fanfic #bitty/jack #shitty/lardo #zine please

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jaywalkers · 6 months

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twenty questions for fic authors

i was tagged by @decaflondonfog! thank you, i loved reading all of your thoughts on your own writing so i'm vv excited to do this.

How many works do you have on AO3? 21 revealed, and then my super secret fic for the @aftgthenandnow fest (which people should totally go and check out if they haven't already)

What's your total AO3 word count? 443,022 words, which is horrifying and likely to hit 500,000 by the end of this year. lord have mercy

What fandoms do you write for? i'm currently very happy in my tfc shaped hole and have been for the last while but i do have some wips floating around for the likes of teen wolf (long live cringe) and mdzs still!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? these bad boys! total pick'n'mix of fandoms here a made thing [10k, sangcheng, T] sunset, like survival [86k, kandreil, E] postcard mouth [7k, matchablossom, G] the post-impact stage [3k, andreil, G] work song, crawl home [3k, sangcheng, G]

Do you respond to comments? Why/why not? in all honesty once i've written a fic it's out there in the world and i am absent from anything going forward of it. i dearly, dearly appreciate everyone who puts time into commenting because it truly is the thing i stick around fandom for, but i don't have the time or energy a lot of the time to reply effectively and to not just keep repeating thank you's!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? considering it uses the 'Bad Ending' tag, it'll have to be a room full of knives! it is canon-compliant though, so is the angst really my fault?

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i feel like most of my fics have a somewhat happy ending, if not just a simple open-ended one, but i might say sunbreak for this because the ending of it is very joyful and there isn't much else left to say to hide the happiness.

Do you get hate on any fics? not really! i did get the worlds most insane comment on NOSTOS a couple years ago that was kind of horrible to read but it was anger at a character and not my fic lmao.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? i'd never written it until this year because it was on my writing goals list for the year! i can't really say what kind because i've only written a couple of scenes so i'm not sure where they sit in the grand scheme of things but i have written some!

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've ever written? not really! i am a big AU fan — the kandreil teen wolf au i wrote this year with the beloved and highly esteemed @dayurno is probably the craziest, but i have a kandrew 'gideon the ninth' au planned too! if we're talking actual crossovers, there was a hilarious in-joke au partially written in a group chat a couple of years ago that was a WOH and MDZS law firm au. xue yang owned jby's soul. wei wuxian had bitcoin. i have a customised t-shirt for it.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? yup! and it's the reason i put writing away for about four years when i was in high school because i was so demotivated to share my stuff.

Have you ever had a fic translated? i think there's two or three of my fics that i've given permission for russian translations! i don't think they've been finished though so it would be cool if that ever ends up happening!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? as stated earlier, i spent eight months in an echo-chamber with @dayurno in which we went into a mutual fugue state and came out with wet-eyed banshee kevin and his high school boyfriends. maybe one day we'll get to the twinyards sequel of it i do also have to shoutout @picturedframes who was half of the mastermind behind sunset, like survival, and has contributed an insane amount to other works like diachronic and all that looking down.

What's your all time favourite ship? don't ask me this,,,, it chops and changes from year to year! i think in favour of being nice to myself i'm going to just say percabeth — they're the OGs from day one and they still hold up in my heart

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? either my 'the old guard' wenzhou au, or the other installments of the nostos 'verse! i loved them dearly at the time and i do think they would be well worth writing still, but my interests have moved on fandom-wise slightly! maybe one day i'll revist them, but not any time soon i don't think.

What are your writing strengths? ohh. digging my teeth into a character, i think. i use fic as a way to kind of just write thesis' and loveletters and stories all at the same time, and i think i'm good at holding up a character and writing out what makes them tick! and maybe a weird one but fleshing out the wider world? i'm very proud of like, my background characters. describing people who take coffee orders and who are studying in the library too and who are one-line classmates.

What are your writing weaknesses? this time last year i would have said dialouge but i think i've gotten better at it this year! probably being too verbose. i think i have a tendency to get carried away with thoughts and descriptions and i think sometimes that means they lose their potency when i really need them! it's a goal for next year i think; learning how to pare back my writing and make it more effective.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? ahhhhhh aha ha ha aha . you're talking to the bitch who's current fic is all about kevin relearning gaeilge/irish so you bet there's a lot of dialogue in other languages in it! also diachronic and sunset, like survival both have a substantial amount of other languages: diachronic uses french, gaeilge, and japanese, while sls throws german into the mix!

First fandom you wrote for? the bible just kidding lmao though i did write stories when i was in catholic school with biblical characters. i think it was fairy tail!

Favourite fic you've written? noooooo don't make me answer this one. there's many different questions inside of that one question (what one i'm most proud of, what one i feel the most for, what one i had the most fun with), and i don't think there's one that works for them all. i think i'll say diachronic, maybe, for now. my first forway into the head of my beloved kevin day and certainly not the last.

i don't know who has/hasn't been tagged in this so it's an open invite, but i am going to tag @dayurno @sunriseinorbit @moondal514 @kamyska

#thank u mari for tagging me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lots of fun procrastinating study with this #my fic #asks+answers

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rebelrayne · 2 years

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Did you get to know anything earlier because you were a mod?

Did you get paid in any way to do it?

Why did you decide to stop?

And what was it like “behind the scenes”?

I'm going to answer under the cut because A, there are spoilers and B, there's a lot to be said here. I'm not trying to keep anyone from playing the games, supporting the games or anything. This was my personal experience and I can't say that it's still going the same way. Also editing to add that I am still no in support of a petition against season 5. I sit on my Tumblr blog in peace.

We did get to know a few things. For one, I was pretty verified that Eddie, Suresh and Finn are LIs. The person who worked for Fusebox said they wanted there to be a thread for each main LI and said, for example: Team Suresh and Team Eddie. They also said Finn was their favorite LI, so that's how I was able to put on Tumblr that I can confirm that. I left (I'll get into why later) but two of the four OG Mods stayed and got information on Gabrielle. They were given her sprite (I saw it too, they sent it to me) but were told not to leak it so we've known what she looked like for about a month now even though it's recent that she was leaked through the files. That week's episodes talked about the turtle tattoo girl but the Fusebox person heavily implied to the remaining mods that Gabrielle is an LI. So yes, we did get some insider information.

But we did get paid 130 gems and 5 passes for a month. So basically 4.333 gems a day. Really not enough, not for what we had to deal with.

I decided to stop for a few reasons. One reason was a member was extremely hostile towards everyone but decided they wanted to pick fights with me in specific. They would ping me out of nowhere to bash Youcef (like I cared because I didn’t) but it was clearly that they just wanted to hurt me. This member did not like when I pushed back on them and pitched a fit which ended in them trying to delete their messages they sent (but the bot literally saved all of them). This member also has sent me a hate message on Tumblr recently, too even though this happened a month and a half ago. Nothing happened to this member either even though they were bullying other members plus mods, it was completely ignored by the person who was from Fusebox.

Another reason was the way things were handled, which will answer the behind the scenes question. The rules were too flimsy and it seemed that Fusebox was focused on there being only positivity for Season 5 but there were some comments that made other mods and other members uncomfortable (the comment I'm referring to is about Will and the member said they had an 'Asian fetish'). There was nothing done about this, instead it was said by the person who worked for Fusebox that it was just poor word choice but they were very descriptive. I can't talk too much on this as it was a different mod that dealt with this. If you want elaboration, I'd be happy to talk with the others and craft a reply that we'd want to put out on this.

Around the same time, we were told we were in our 'cliques' and we needed to be more professional. We do not work for Fusebox, we are basically volunteers but being told we need to 'act professional' which taken as you shouldn't act as yourself. We understood to an extent but four of the OG mods were asked to come over from the fan server because they liked the atmosphere of the fan server. There was no discussion about how they wanted to act, no expectations or guidelines so we went thinking they wanted us to interact with the members like friends and keep discussions going. We were all very upset when we were scolded and lectured. We were told that if a professional company like "Netflix" came in to look at the Discord server, we would look unprofessional. Well, we don't work for Fusebox. If you want someone to act like Fusebots, then have people who work at Fusebox run the server. We were also left by ourselves on weekends (which are obviously very busy times) and the Fusebox person never logged on, even though we had issues where needed help.

Anyone from the OG Fan server knows we had these cute little acronyms that we used and people started using them on the main server which blew up. Fusebox was very against it but when we suggested making roles so members could show which LIs and characters they liked instead so we could get them to remove the acronyms, they shut it down.

About a week later, I left alongside another mod (we actually left together at the same time) because we couldn't take it anymore. This mod isn't on Tumblr, they're just a close friend. Last we know, some of the mods are openly bashing Season 5, which we were basically told we shouldn't do.

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sickkillerzach · 2 years

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My official goodbyes (Ily <3)

So it's been approximately six months since I made that (now deleted) post confirming I was leaving, and I haven't posted since

No, this is not a return post, in fact this is the official "end of the line" post, hence posting it here for those small amounts who find it (for those who do, wow, you still check in here? You ACTUALLY care that much? I appreciate it.)

I'm still done with tumblr, I'm still done with bullshit, and I'm not coming back.

This is a clarification, and a "where I'm at" post.

I feel I left kinda abruptly without a real explanation as to why it happened.

I think I left it as "the anon hate I was receiving was getting to me"

Truth is, it wasn't. It was just the cherry on top of all the shit I've been going through.

To start things off, I've been going through some major changes in my life. As some of you know, I am fifteen years old as of now. Yeah, I'm quite young than the average user, I'm aware. Yes, I know tumblr TOS says you have to be thirteen years old or older, and I created this blog when I was eleven. Big whoop, I'm older than 13 now.

Point is, I've come to the reality that I'm not a little kid anymore and I need to be focusing on my future. And, I have started to work towards that path, and, without going into too much detail, certain people in my life haven't exactly been most supportive of some decisions of mine, which is a problem that needs taken care of.

And I took the first step to that journey a few weeks ago. A few weeks ago, I decided to cut off my "friends"

Yeah, those "friends". My irls that I have absolutely bitched about for the past few years of this blog. I'm officially no longer speaking to any of them, and feel much better about it. I really couldn't take being around those fake people who aren't really my friends at all.

That's besides the point however. Back to the negative stuff.

What else has gone on in my personal life?

Since February I've been suffering from intense stomach pains and problems.

It seems to have only gotten worse in the months since.

I feel like I can't go a few hours without rushing to the bathroom. And then fifteen minutes after that, I go again. And again.

And when I'm not doing that, I'm getting constant cramps, and am in a lot of pain.

I can't even eat or drink certain foods and liquids I used to handle well.

Spicy foods? No more. Coke and Pepsi? No more. The list goes on.

I'm not sure what is causing this. I feel I need to go to a gastroenterologist, and take a look at what is wrong with me. Until then, this must persist.

What else?

I lately have had to come to terms with a death in my family, realizing I have no more extended family any longer.

And the list goes on. And on. As you can see, life has, in many ways, only gotten worse since leaving.

But, I don't feel like typing everything that's been wrong.

I would like to think life will get better from here, but who knows. I HIGHLY doubt things will.

And so, to conclude the four year long journey of this blog (From November 18 2018, to now)

No, not the shitty thanks I gave in December in a fit of rage and depression. A well thought out, proper goodbye, eight months in the making.

To the Eric Cartman/South Park fans:Holy shit, if you're still sticking around, I can't believe it. You are a SERIOUS og.

Even though I have had new hyperfixations in the last four years, I just have to give a big GIGANTIC thanks to you guys for giving me the courage to make the following I made over this time. But ESPECIALLY to the two people I talked to when I was on anon the months leading up to the creation of this account.

I came here in mid-late 2018, after over a year of hyperfixating on Cartman, and feeling super weird for it. I felt like it was weird to be relating to a villain and antagonist of the story, but saw there was an entire Cartman community, and decided to give it a shot.

Cartman was the first time I really looked at a villain in a more "grey" perspective. Before, I was like most people, looked at it as a black and white situation.

But he showed me villains aren't always that. With his complex, relatable backstory, and funny charisma and charm, he quickly became one of my favorite characters of all time.

I always looked at Cartman less of a "sexual" character with ships, and self inserts, I always looked at Cartman as more of a little brother figure. Someone who I could love, and he could love, and be the older figure he needed in his childhood.

And so, I feel that made me stand out, as I seemed to be different than other Cartman blogs.

I know I've bitched a LOT about South Park in all my time in the fandom. The last seven years of the show have been an absolute nightmare, and it's funny how the same year I began posting in it's fandom, I stopped watching the show officially.

Still, despite my absolute hatred for the current seasons of the series, I must thank the show for EVERYTHING it brought me. All the early-mid childhood memories watching the show, and my preteen years of running this blog and posting my terrible fanfiction.

Once again, thank you to everyone in the SP and Cartman community, and especially thanks to those two people. I won't name them, as I feel that'd be awkward, but you two know who you are.

As I arrived at the house in the freezing cold Colorado snow town, I came across a house, it seemed to have some kind of factory working in the backyard of it. I saw a boy back there, no younger than ten, no older than twelve. He paused when he saw me through the windows, and he opened the door.

"Hey," the boy spoke, "who are you?"

"M-m-my name is-" I couldn't even finish my sentence over my teeth chattering in the cold.

"Wow, you look pretty rough," he said. He stopped, and stood for a moment.

"Well, look, why don't I take you in and help you out a bit. It's not what I usually do, but you seem desperate."

"Thank you so much sir!" I exclaimed.

"Let's get some soup and hot drinks in you," the boy said, coming towards me to help me in.

And now, to the Modern Family/Gloria fans.

Boy, what a ride this fandom was.

As the founding father of this small fandom, I can say this fandom was a journey.

I remember when it was just me, and a few select individuals who were in this super small community in late 2019. We were just a few people talking about how passionate we were about the series, and how much we loved Gloria, and how a piece of us all related to her, despite us not wanting to. But we couldn't help it with her tragic backstory, because, truthfully, a whole lot of her life was out of her control.

And we watched the community grow and grow.

Until the biggest moment. After knowing for some time, our small, unpopular show had been canceled, the last episode aired on April 8 2020. We all gathered round our screens to watch our heroes (and villains) roll the credits one last time. And it was one of the most divisive things I've ever seen.

People loving the ending. People hating it. People in between. And I loved the divisiveness.

You might think that was a bad thing. And if it was a bigger fandom, like SP's, it would have been.

But our small circle took it well, and was not toxic about it.

And throught that Summer, during lockdown, we only saw more and more people jumping into the series, thanks to streaming services. Sure, it wasn't enough to make it a big community, but it was big enough where it was a community.

It was a small happy group. To quote the late Kurt Cobain "Our little group has always been, and always will until the end."

Since the Fall of that year though, the fandom had went into a serious decline. More and more people had been getting into new things, which is perfectly fine, and I totally understand. The problem wasn't you guys getting into new things, the problem was, I wasn't.

My interest in the series was dwindling myself too. But, I just hadn't really known where else to go.

Still, that fandom was such an enjoyable experience for me, and I owe it so much for the time and friends it made.

After growing up with Cartman in Colorado, Cartman gave me plane tickets to Los Angeles. "You need to take these," he began, "there's someone special waiting for you there."

I was frozen.

"What are you talking about Cartman? We're best friends! Brothers even! And you know brotherhood is forever!

"We may be,but you'll be even happier with her," he explained. "Don't worry bro, we'll still stay in contact."

I hugged him, and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"I love you little bro," I said in my tears.

"I love you too, big bro."

I packed my things, and went to the airport. It would be a long flight, as Colorado to California was quite a distance. Not to mention, my fear of heights made the flight even worse.

When I finally arrived, I checked the address twice, and walked to the beautiful modern house. I rang the doorbell, and that's when I met my Colombian beauty. I would be her husband, and be the father figure her two boys needed.

It seemed to be going wonderfully. Life WAS much better now that I was here.

And now, finally, to the Paige fans. Now, I know there weren't many of you, but I still feel I should honor that part of my blog's history.

I couldn't ever help but feel sorry for her the few times the writers decided to show her sympathetic side. A lot of things were out of her control in life, and it fucked her up. I really enjoyed the potential around her character. I always liked the idea of changing her, and redeeming herself, and using those urges to kill, and fuel it towards killing people who deserve it.

The thing about Paige was, it took me a very long time to admit I liked her. I wanted to hate her, believe me, but I couldn't after a while.

But some fucking cowards who hide behind anonymous seem to think that liking and enjoying a fictional character (who isn't real and didn't harm real people) is the equivalent to the type of shit some of those freaks in the true crime community do, where the "stan" an actual killer, who killed REAL people. That's obviously not all true crime fanns, but a small minority of them.

If you somehow enjoyed the small amount of Paige content I produced, and were disappointed by what little I offered, I'm sorry for what happened.

And I just want this to be known that I didn't leave in the first place BECAUSE of the anon hate I was receiving, or even the quantity and mass spamming of it. It's the whole culture behind this site I can't get behind anymore. Last spring I freaked the hell out because my account was terminated for a day for a "controversial post". Whatever.

I know social media has always been a toxic place, but I can't be the only one who thinks it's gotten worse in the past few years.

As Gloria drove away into the sunset with me in the shotgun seat (which was unusual, as I was always the one to drive), we stopped somewhere in San Francisco. The street sign said "Portero Avenue"

"We're here," she said, in her thick Spanish accent.

"What do you mean, hun?" I asked excitedly.

"You need to go to that apartment building. Room 126. There's someone awaiting your presence there."

"There is?" I asked, remembering what happened with Cartman years ago.

"Si. You must go with her now. She will be your new girl for some time."

I gave Gloria a big passionate kiss on the lips and hugged her tightly. I could tell she was emotional, as she gripped me tightly towards her. I cried a little bit, like I did before, but I knew that it was for the best

I opened the door to the car, and she spoke once more. "Just one little thing, if you think I'm crazy, you're not prepared for what this new girl is going to be like."

I did as she asked, and went to room 126. I knocked on the door, and a girl with red hair opened the door.

"Well, Hello there! I knew you'd come around eventually!" she exclaimed.

Special thanks to the other fandoms outside of my main three;Call of Duty zombies, Pokemon, furbies, and any other fandoms I found here. I love all of you as well.

Well, this is OFFICIALLY it. I know this is exhausting to hear from me constantly letting you know that I'm leaving, but this is officially it. Do I have any plans to ever return? It's a possibility, but a highly unlikely one. Will I ever find a place on social media after this? Probably not as well.

Do I regret my time here?

Absolutely fucking not. Not one goddamn bit.

I came here when I was a really self conscious preteen, and needed some comfort and support. And it helped me so much. No, YOU helped me so much.

This site has given me countless hours of laughter, joy, and most importantly, some of the best friends I've ever had in this entire world. And I am so honored to call you all my friends.

I will occasionally check in, and see if I have any DM's, and other sources, but posts, as far as I know, are completely finished here.

12 notes · View notes

dourpeep · 3 years

Note

Fun scenarios for teashop!darling (that's what im gonna call them)

One time Scaramouche saw a customer come out crying(andrunningfortheirlife) and when he asked teashop!darling they said that "The customer was told to leave for causing a ruckus and they were heartbroken that they couldn't drink tea here anymore" and he doesn't completely believe that

Signora once saw teashop!darling one-shot four Geovishaps (without using their vision) because the Geovishaps kept bothering them while they were trying to pick herbs

Tartaglia was talking to Baizhu while he was getting patched up after a fight and found out that Baizhu was scared low-key scared of teashop!darling because he met them while teashop!darling was still an adventurer and they left quite the impression on him

Bonus: one time when all 3 of them were at your shop they noticed you were wearing a ring and thought 'wait- they were in a relationship with someone? Who??!' and no you weren't you just found that ring when you were cleaning out your room and thought 'why not wear it? It looks good.' they only found out when they were about to leave lol

-no primogems

Ehe going back through the stuff in my inbox to answer the longer things nowww

Aforementioned//og teashop!Reader post

You're running a business and has no time for people trying to cause trouble. If a customer refuses to understand that? You'll make sure they will.

Of course, it'll all be done quickly and quietly as to not disturb the atmosphere.

And...well, with you being an incredibly pleasant host at all times, it's certainly unnerving when the gentle gaze turns sharp and cold. Anyway-

Scaramouche was making his way down back towards Liyue Harbor following an assignment just in area of Guili Plains. It was getting late and, while he normally would head back to camp, there was a peculiar sight that drew him towards your teahouse.

Or, rather, a panicked man nearly knocked the Harbinger off his feet in attempt to get as far from the place as possible.

If it weren't for the sight of your figure standing in the entryway, he would've responded with more than a quiet curse and scathing look. Hands on your hips, you watch the man disappear over past the hills before perking up at the sight of one of your favorite customers.

A quick stop for tea wouldn't hurt.

Once inside, he noticed that the other patrons were entirely unbothered. Little drifts of small talk and laughter from a table in a further off space instead filled the pleasant warmth of the teahouse.

So...if it wasn't something within the building...what did you do to that man to make him so terrified?

If he asks, you'll give him a little shrug before offering a complimentary slice of house-made matcha cake.

Not gonna lie. Anyone who can oneshot four of those guys should be feared.

Especially alone. With little else than a plain straw hat and a basket carefully filled with various herbs, it only took a mere moment--the blink of an eye--before the Fair Lady saw you wipe your hands against your apron.

There's still a lingering bit of frost that nips at her skin, catalyst primed and ready in the case that she'd have to jump in to help you.

Were there not just a group of vishaps...?

Even with the sure knowledge of this, there wasn't dust floating in the air (a normal occurrence in fighting geovishaps in the plains) nor was there the tell-tale sparkle of their bodies disintegrating upon defeat.

But Signora was smarter than to ask you of it

Instead, she watches for a little longer until you notice her standing beneath the shade of a sunsettia tree.

Once you do and the two of you head back to the teahouse, you share a cup of freshly brewed herbal tea. The knowing look in your eye is really all she needs to understand.

Now, don't get me wrong, you are good friends with Bubu Pharmacy's owner. After all, you did offer quite a few medicinal brews that agreed to offer at his pharmacy.

But, even with Baizhu's enigmatic personality, he's clever enough to know not to cross you. Even his employees are sure to keep in your good books (though, both Qiqi and Herbalist Gui don't have a problem with that).

It's a slight reaction that the man has to your name that gets Tartaglia's curiosity going.

Just a passing mention when he noticed that the pharmacy carries a certain tea that you served last time he visited the teahouse. While purchasing a few pounds of the mix, Tartaglia laughed and started to talk about that first meeting where you simply said Get out--

Baizhu almost immediately changed the subject and the Fatui's left with a slightly more inflated charge.

Once more, the three meet at your shop. With Tartaglia and Scaramouche assigned to their respective posts in Liyue and Signora making frequent stops between her own missions, it's become a sort of rendezvous point for the three Harbingers.

The moment that the glittering ring catches the light, Tartaglia chokes.

You, being sweet, immediately come over to make sure that he's alright and that's when the other two catch the sight of it.

Surely you weren't already engaged? Just a mere two months ago you mentioned how you had no suitor in your life-

But it's not really something that someone can congratulate on right?

Even when the passing comment about the piece floats, you laugh and wave it off like it's a joke. Perhaps it wasn't something you wished for? If so, the three of them had more than enough ability to sway this...person's wishes.

By the time the tea is drained and the light snacks they ordered finished, another customer voices a congratulations. An older woman who is almost always at the shop.

"Oh? Oh! No, no, this is one of my own, ahma- I simply found it while fixing up last night."

"It's lovely, but a shame you have not yet found a lovely person."

Her eyes drift over across the teashop before settling on the table with three very curious Harbingers (all in various modes of 'listening in').

Needless to say, she takes her leave and the trio are left with a few thoughts of their own.

Hm.

At least you're not taken.

Yet.

569 notes · View notes

sanzu-sanzu-sanzu · 2 years

Note

i’ve been thinking,, since bonten!ran, rin, and koko all have dyed hair (maybe even mikey unless the white is from stress), do they all go to a salon every month to get a touch up, or do they all just makes plans to get together on a day every month and touch it up themselves? (and if we were to tie it into your fic, perhaps reader helps them dye it?) sorry for this crackhead ask, i’m just having random thoughts in the middle of the night.

ANON HELLO I APOLOGIZE FOR THE SUPER LATE RESPONSE lol this has been in my ask for so long so i’m so sorry ahaha, but ok, i think they usually go their separate ways when redying/styling their hair. at one point, they all would go to the same salon that was recommended by rindou and ran. there’s this one stylist who’d done countless jobs on the haitanis’ hair for years and eventually just became bonten’s like go-to stylist. if they all happened to be there it’s mostly coincidence if not simple convenience (insert the spiderman meme) and when more than one executive had to spend a long time there the entire place was obligated to close. sometime later tho the salon got caught in the middle of a local crossfire (not c/o the executives of course bec they’re more careful than that, it was some other bonten members) and had to relocate :-( which proved to be too far / too impractical for manjiro + some of them to go to tho so..goodbye stylist. because of it, some of them simply had to learn to do retouch and stuff themselves cus..if somebody else does it and they fuck up they could end up with a dead body, right? especially ran rindou and koko (oh, koko is one meticulously styled man he’d strangle anyone who does so much as muss up his hair). surprisingly, sanzu’s pink hair doesn’t stress him out as much as you might expect—like, if he somehow ends up with a slightly brighter pink he might grumble for a bit, hypothetically speaking, but he wouldn’t right away kill the stylist you know—he does care but he’d get used to it WHICH IS what irks the others cus he’s never had a bad hair job, which is simply unfair. just like manjiro…nobody knows how but somehow his hair’s always been perfectly done. and Reader, because she’s stopped dying her hair after high school. she’s had, back then, dyed her hair pink and purple and blue and green i swear every color known to man, and blonde too styled like rogue’s hair, and whatever hair fuck-ups she’d had only the og toman guys have witnessed (yes, even sanzu, and manjiro had at one point remarked how his consistent shade of pink had been the same shade that she had had for like, four months all those years ago. on second thought, maybe sanzu would be pissed if his hair ends up with the wrong shade of pink…)

SO, back to their stylist going away and them learning how to do their own hair. so naturally, there was a time when half the bonten executives had funny looking, badly teased hair, even koko unfortunately so it was a funny, hellish time for all the wrong reasons. which was where Reader came in. it was the second time of the day that koko had “””accidentally””” snapped at her for very petty reasons and she—not exactly the model of patience as others would be made to believe—right there and then stood up, she’s like, Okay, that’s it, we’re fixing that horrible ash blonde, come on. and that’s how she ended up going to koko’s house that afternoon and koko subdued and grumpy at his toilet at the mercy of Reader’s surprisingly adept hands (which was when he remembered, Oh yeah she had neon green tips back in the day..).

long story short, the haitanis ended up roping her to get theirs fixed too when koko came in the next day with his normal, beautifull silver tresses back, smug as a rock. so that strange bonten phase was over. about a year later, ran and rindou had tried coaxing Reader again to help them with their touch-ups, which she eventually agreed to after some under the table dealings that yielded to her getting free lunch for 2 weeks (one for each haitani). it happened that koko had requested her help too and she was like, you know what, let’s just all get together one saturday afternoon and do it all in one place. the saturday afternoon actually became a thursday 2AM because their schedules are just fucked up like that. and so it goes.

sanzu had been so blessed (but also, maybe, cursed) to not have a bad case of hair retouch as to ever warrant Reader’s help in that regard.. oh, but she had, this one time, done a double take at his hair after a hair re-dye and then smiled, which caught him off-guard.. “i’ve always liked this shade of pink.” she simply said before waking off. sanzu had no reason letting anybody know and so it just became his little secret. maybe Reader’s, too, if she remembers. (she does).

—

thank you for sending this, anon! i hope u enjoyed :)

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noona-clock · 3 years

Text

What’s Your Sign?: Sagittarius

Genre: Celebrity!AU

Pairing: Choi Minho x You (Female!Reader)

Warnings: None

Words: 5,534

Author’s Note: Since I’m so fascinated by astrology, I decided to do a Zodiac series! I will be writing a one-shot fic for each sign featuring different members from different groups (and even an actor!). Each story will be posted on the 5th of the month during that sign’s season. Please reblog, comment, or send in an ask with your feedback! Thank you for your support 💜

Ever since you’d seen him in his first ever role on a television series about five years ago, you’d fallen in love with Minho.

Choi Minho, probably the most attractive man you’d ever seen. Through a screen, at least. You hadn’t yet been lucky enough to see him in person.

And since you’d fallen in love with him after watching his very first episode of that television series, you’d done nothing but support him for the last several years.

You saw every one of his movies the day it released in theatres. You watched every single episode of every single television show he appeared in -- even if he was just a guest star.

His popularity from his first role had soared pretty quickly, which was really a win/win scenario. Minho, who presumably had been a struggling actor previously, was now flush with offers from directors. And you, an immediate superfan, got to spend a lot of virtual time with your new favorite actor -- because, not only did he act in a very large handful of projects every year, he was also interviewed on talk shows, featured in magazines, walking the red carpet of premieres and award shows. He didn’t have a social media presence for some extremely odd reason, but you still felt like you knew him.

From everything you’d seen and read about him, Minho was outgoing, friendly, and charismatic. He was confident, straight-forward, and optimistic. He basically always had some version of a smile on his lips, and based on many posts in the Choi Minho subreddit, he never turned down an opportunity to meet a fan out in public.

He... was basically perfect.

And you couldn’t stop yourself from daydreaming about one day meeting him, falling in love, getting married, and having about ten children together in the most beautiful house in the universe.

But, to be fair, your daydream wasn’t entirely impossible!

You were a bit of a celebrity, yourself!

Kind of.

On the Internet.

You had started a YouTube Channel six years ago, and at first, you hadn’t really had a clear vision for your videos. An absolutely rookie mistake, of course, but there’s nothing you could do about it now.

You’d started off with makeup tutorials because that had been the hottest YouTube trend at the time. But... you quickly discovered you weren’t as good at makeup as one should be to post a tutorial online in good conscience. You also weren’t quite good enough at doing your nails, cooking, or sewing to do videos about those.

For at least a few months, you’d been stumped. You knew you wanted your own YouTube channel -- you had a pretty fitting personality for it -- you just didn’t have any one marketable skill.

Until, one day, you stumbled upon a video of a guy watching a K-Pop music video for the first time and reacting to it. That was literally it. The whole video had been just him watching and talking about it.

And you were very good at that. You loved watching things on a screen -- YouTube videos, television shows, movies, you name it! And you always had thoughts running through your head while you watched something. In fact, you frequently wished one of your friends had exactly the same taste in music, shows, and movies as you so you could voice those thoughts aloud to someone who actually wanted to listen.

So, how had you never thought of doing that on your YouTube channel?! There was obviously a market for it -- the guy you’d watched had a few hundred thousand subscribers, and since it was something you genuinely enjoyed doing, you weren’t afraid of running out of content inspiration or motivation any time soon.

It was literally the perfect idea.

The next day, you had set up your camera, pulled up the first episode of your favorite television show of all time, and got to work. When you posted the video a few hours later (Re-watching my FAVORITE show of all time), something about it just felt right. Like the stars had aligned. No matter if you got five views or five thousand, you knew you were on the right path -- when it came to YouTube, at least.

Every day after that, you chose something else to watch -- a nostalgic movie, a viral YouTube video, the really cheesy musical episode of a television show. You tried to pick things from all along the spectrum, and you also tried to wait a few days in-between continuing on with your re-watch of your favorite show, simply for variety’s sake.

Little by little, your channel began to grow. After work, you would film, edit, and post -- every single day. On the weekends, you would film two different videos in case you ever needed to take a day off. Or in case you just felt like posting two videos!

Your first sponsorship offer email had come about six months after you’d posted your first video, and your eyes had nearly fell out of your head when you’d seen how much they’d offered you. (Looking back, your first paying YouTube gig really hadn’t been that much money -- compared to what you could make now, at least -- but it had still been incredibly thrilling.) And, really, that had been the catalyst of your YouTube career and popularity. It seemed just the one sponsorship had been all you’d needed to catch the attention of other brands who wanted to work with you, and when you got to the point where you could actually afford to quit your job and turn down sponsorship offers you weren’t wild about? That’s when you knew you’d made it.

Okay, but really, you knew you’d made it when one of your videos hit one million views for the first time (a video of you watching a particularly cringe-worthy teen movie from about ten years ago).

And now, six years later, you had almost four million subscribers, and your most viewed video had almost twenty million views. Sometimes, you still couldn’t believe it!

The highlight of your time on YouTube so far -- at least, in your eyes -- had been when you’d seen Choi Minho for the first time about a year after starting your channel. You’d still had less then one-hundred thousand subscribers back then, so if anyone ever left on a comment on a video mentioning how long you’d been a Minho fangirl or remembering when you first discovered him, you knew they were an OG subscriber. But ever since that video, you did absolutely nothing to hide your affinity for him, both as an actor and as a person. You watched and reacted to every single one of his movies and every single television show episode -- you even sometimes reacted to interviews or videos other fans had made about him.

Even when your channel hit some pretty big milestones -- five-hundred thousand subscribers, one million, two million, three million subscribers -- you never played it cool when it came to Choi Minho. You switched up your content and your editing style here and there, but one constant on your YouTube channel was the fact you let your inner fangirl shine for all the world to see.

In fact, just last month, the trailer for his new movie dropped, and you were able to upload your reaction to it within two hours. Since then, you’d read and watched every interview you could find, favorited every tweet about the upcoming film, and liked every post on the #ChoiMinho hashtag on Instagram. Since he had no social media, you had to be satisfied with other people’s content rather than his own.

You were scrolling through his hashtag on Instagram right now, actually, as you procrastinated getting out of bed to go set up for another day of filming.

Now that you had almost four million subscribers and were approached by more than several companies for sponsorships every single day, you were able to focus on your channel full-time. You definitely got cabin fever from time to time, but it was worlds better than filming after work and on weekends. Now, you could actually take a day off whenever you wanted! It was glorious!

But you still procrastinated working. You were still human, after all.

After you caught up on his hashtag and liked just about every picture you could, you navigated to your inbox to look through your DMs. Over the years, it had gotten pretty easy to skip past the spam and sugar daddy requests (which were plentiful, unfortunately), so you no longer dreaded checking the unread messages. You could usually tell which ones to delete straight away from the profile picture and first few words alone.

To be quite honest, you really only opened ones where you either could tell someone was genuinely reaching out to say hi or thank you for posting your videos or... messages with Minho’s name visible in the preview. Shameless, but oh well!

After deleting a few messages at the top which were clearly spam, the next one you came to was actually one of those messages -- you saw ‘Minho’ in the preview. It was the very first word, even! And in all caps.

You pressed on it as quickly as you could.

And when your eyes took in the rest of the message... your heart stopped.

MINHO WATCHED ONE OF YOUR VIDEOS!

...This had to be a prank, right?

But right after the message in all capital letters was a link to a YouTube video, and the preview for the video was right below the message.

It was one of those videos put out by a big fashion magazine where celebrities watch videos about them and react to it. Usually, musicians and singers would react to covers of their songs by fans, but every once in a while, actors would read tweets or watch fanmade videos about them.

And when you clicked on the link this person had sent, the video opened in your YouTube app to show the title “Choi Minho Watches Fan Videos on YouTube,” and your eyes widened.

If what the Instagram message said was true... Minho had watched not only a fan video... but your fan video. And since his movie was premiering in just a couple of days, he had most likely watched your reaction to the trailer.

Oh my god.

Since the video had started automatically after clicking the link, you took a deep breath and concentrated all of your focus on your phone screen. You were not going to miss the part where he watched your video.

But, of course, after not even thirty seconds, you found you had already gotten distracted by how handsome he looked.

You quickly shook your head a bit, widening your eyes briefly before narrowing them to focus on your screen again. “Come on, Y/N,” you muttered to yourself. “You can watch it again right after this to admire him.”

It was only a fifteen-minute video, so it’s not like you had to wait forever to get to the part where he watched you!

Still, though, as the minutes ticked by, you felt your heart begin to race in anticipation.

What would he say about you? Would he find your obsession with him creepy? I mean, it had to be a little creepy watching someone squeal and profess their love for you -- someone you’d never met!

But, then... when you got really mushy comments... most of the time, it didn’t feel creepy. It just felt sweet, and you were incredibly grateful that a lot of your subscribers and viewers were so supportive.

Ugh! You were getting off track again!

You shook your head once more and set your gaze back onto your phone screen.

Finally, when the clip of Minho watching a fanmade music video transitioned into the clip of him watching your video, your breath caught in your throat.

Were you going to survive this?

Outcome is unclear.

“Oh, yeah, I know her,” Minho said as your trailer reaction video began to play in the corner. “She’s the reaction girl, right?”

Your jaw dropped.

................Excuse me?!

Minho knew you?!

As you watched Minho watching you with the most adorable soft grin on his lips, your hand slowly crept up to cover your mouth in shock.

And, then, when you in the video paused the trailer to bring up another one of his movies that this trailer had reminded you of, his grin widened and he looked very pleased. “She knows her stuff, huh?”

You heard someone behind the camera murmuring something, and subtitles appeared on the screen. “She’s a known superfan, actually.”

Minho’s brow furrowed and he leaned toward the camera. “She’s what?”

“A superfan,” the person repeated, a little bit louder. “She’s known to her viewers for watching all of your movies and shows. There are always comments about you on all of her videos.”

Minho’s eyes widened a little in surprise. “Really? All of them? Comments about me?” He leaned back and nodded slowly after, apparently, receiving a positive answer. “I had no idea. I’ve just seen her videos about, like, the cheesy teen movies we watched as kids.”

You truly almost dropped your phone.

So... he knew who you were, but he hadn’t known that you fangirled over him on a regular basis?

First of all, how was that possible?

Second of all, did it really matter?! He knew who you were!

He knew who you were!

You didn’t expect that he regularly watched your videos, but still.

HE KNEW WHO YOU WERE!

Your heart was practically beating out of your chest as you watched him finish up watching your reaction video. The look on his face was one of delight, and even though you knew he was a good actor, it sure didn’t seem like he was simply pretending not to be creeped out.

“She’s so fun,” he smiled as your video ended, his gaze shifting back to the person he had spoken with earlier. “She has more? Like, for my movies?”

The person mumbled something back, and this time, there were no subtitles on the bottom of the video. But Minho’s eyebrows shot up immediately.

“All of my movies?” he asked. And then he let out a joyous chuckle and added, “No way.”

He quickly turned to the computer and clicked on your channel name.

But the video transitioned into another clip of someone else’s video, so you didn’t get to see if he actually watched any other ones.

Even if he hadn’t, you were still overjoyed -- to say the least -- that he had watched just one!

He knew who you were! He had actually known who you were before this which was probably the most surprising thing you’d ever heard in your entire life. (Besides the fact that Minho was currently single. That was definitely more surprising than anything.)

After sitting in your bed for a few minutes, staring blankly at your screen as the video finished up, your gaze unfocused and blurry, you finally came to when you realized the video had ended.

And then you proceeded to freak out.

You squealed and shrieked and kicked your legs and rolled around and scrambled to your feet to jump up and down on your bed with glee.

Was this the best day of your life?

Quite possibly!

Once you’d calmed down just a tad, you plopped back into a sitting position, crossing your legs into a pretzel as you navigated back to Instagram.

You sent a reply to the person who’d sent you the video (”OH MY GOD THANK YOU HE KNOWS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”) and then refreshed your inbox.

As expected, a whole new slew of messages came through and literally every single one seemed to be about the video.

Your lips split into a huge grin, and just before you clicked on a random one to read and reply to it... you noticed that one message had a blue check by the sender.

Pausing, you shifted your gaze to that message.

And your heart jumped up into your throat when you recognized the name of the account.

Obviously, it wasn’t Minho himself because he didn’t have one.

But it was the next best thing.

His management company.

You followed them, of course, and liked every single picture about him or with him. Of course!

But you had never gathered up the courage to message them. You’d had no reason to! What would you have said?

And now they were messaging you.

The several days following the video of Minho watching your video had been... a blur. To say the least.

You still weren’t even really sure how you’d gotten here.

I mean, you knew you were here because Minho’s management company had direct messaged you on Instagram inviting you to the premiere of his movie and you had accepted without one millisecond of hesitation and then you’d gotten on a plane a couple of days later and then checked into a super nice hotel and had a stylist and makeup artist sent to your room and after many hours you now looked better than you ever had in your entire life.

That’s how you got here.

But you still weren’t even really sure how you’d gotten here.

A rather large stroke of luck?

Good karma?

Hard work to grow your YouTube channel into something that would make you more easily recognizable by actual celebrities and their management companies?

Or a combination of the three?

Either way, you were overwhelmed with gratitude, and you knew you would never be able to forget this experience -- even if you, for some odd reason, wanted to.

I mean, you were currently in a really nice car, and the driver (yes, you had a driver!) was taking you to the red carpet.

The red carpet!

An actual movie premiere! With an actual red carpet!

And the movie was Minho’s movie.

You were at the premiere of Minho’s movie.

Oh my god, what if you saw him?!

As the car rolled to a stop in front of a crowded theatre, your heart and stomach dropped down to your very expensive and gorgeous shoes.

You’d gone to somewhat fancy events before -- it came with the job of being a YouTuber -- but never anything like this. Never an actual movie premiere. Never the chance of seeing your favorite actor in the history of time. And, obviously, never walking a red carpet.

Your door magically opened just as the car stopped moving, and a hand popped out of nowhere to assist you in exiting the vehicle. As gracefully as you could, you slipped your fingers into the mysterious palm, allowing it to gently pull you up and out of your seat and onto the sidewalk.

Almost immediately, camera clicks, light bulb flashes, and inquiring voices filled the air.

Cameras and lights in your face, you were used to. It was your everyday life, in fact!

But... all these people? Looking at you? Watching you? Taking pictures of you?

I mean, yeah, a few million people watched your videos. But it was absolutely not the same as a hundred or so reporters and photographers standing right in front of you.

Thankfully, some short but very powerful woman guided you onto the red carpet, muttering to you that all you had to do was stand in front of the backdrop, pose and smile for the cameras, and then move on to the next mark. Some reporters from news and entertainment channels would be waiting along the way to interview you (which didn’t scare you quite so much as you’d been interviewed a few times before), and all in all, it would take about an hour.

But it took you way less than an hour to discover that walking a red carpet is not as glamorous as it looks on television.

Walking like your shoes were covered in almost-frozen molasses so every photo taken was a good one. Switching back and forth between facial expressions so every photo taken wasn’t the same one. And do you know how many good places there are to put your hands when posing for a picture? Exactly two. One was on your hip and the other at your side. That was it. Definitely not clasped in front of or behind you, and definitely not tucking your hair behind your ear.

And just when you were sort of getting used to the constant posing for pictures, another short but powerful woman gently grabbed your arms and led you to a reporter from the most-watched entertainment news channel in the country.

“Hello, hello!” the perky reporter chirped as you approached her. “Come on over here!”

“Hi,” you greeted awkwardly as you made your way to the small mark on the ground next to her, holding up your skirt with one hand so you wouldn’t trip.

“Y/N! Good evening, good evening, how are you doing?” she asked before sticking the microphone in your face.

You had to quickly get over the shock of her knowing your name since you didn’t want to look like a fool on live television, so you forced a grin on your lips and answered, “I’m pretty overwhelmed, actually!” you chuckled.

“Is this your first time at a red carpet?”

“It is, yes,” you confirmed with a slight nod. “And I’m so used to being alone in my house, talking to myself in front of a camera, so this is all new territory for me.”

The reporter laughed with delight before asking which designer you were wearing. You answered her with ease since your stylist had drilled it into your brain before you’d left the hotel.

Then, after she asked you to tell the folks at home what you’re known for, she said, “It’s a pretty fun story of how you got here, isn’t it?”

“Oh, it is,” you answered, your lips pulling into a shy but excited grin. “I woke up one morning to a message on Instagram, and someone had sent me --”

The reporter interrupted you then, and you noticed her gaze was directed over your shoulder. You turned to look, and --

Well, the next few moments happened so quickly, you really had no idea how you reacted.

“Y/N!” Minho called out, smiling widely and waving before reaching out and sliding his hands over your shoulders. He stood next to you, squeezing you once before letting his arms drop down to his side. “I’m so sorry for interrupting --”

“No, we were just talking about why she’s here at your premiere!”

Minho’s smile brightened even more, and he continued on with the story you’d been telling.

Meanwhile, you were standing there. Mute. Staring at him.

Because oh my god.

How was it actually possible that Minho was more handsome in real life?

But also, how was it actually possible that Minho was standing next to you in real life?

But also also, how was it actually possible that Minho was real?

That’s the real question, isn’t it?

You came to when you heard him say, “Yes, this is our first time meeting,” before turning to you and holding out his hand for a handshake. “It’s so nice to finally meet you!”

You took his hand, shaking it weakly, and said the first thing that came to your mind: “Oh my god, hi.”

The reporter giggled, but Minho, instead of acting embarrassed for you, simply let go of your hand and moved to pull you into a hug.

Holy cannoli, Minho was hugging you.

Choi Minho. Was hugging. You.

Hugging!

You!

“It’s so nice to finally meet you!” he repeated with a grin after pulling away, though he was still incredibly close to you and gazing at you with those sparkling, dreamy eyes of his.

“You, too,” you managed to reply shakily.

The reporter then went on to interview Minho, asking him who had designed his suit, what his character in this new movie was like, and if he was working on any new projects.

“I’m in the early stages of something, yes,” he answered. “I don’t think I can say too much more, but in the meantime, I think I’d really like to film some videos with Y/N, branch out onto social media.”

Your heart stopped, and you knew your facial expression was doing nothing to hide your surprise.

Minho then turned to you with an adorably guilty look on his face. “I mean, if it’s alright with you, of course.”

“Yes, absolutely!” you burst out immediately, and the reporter giggled once again.

“Well, there you have it, guys,” she said after turning to face the camera. “You heard it here first -- a brand new collaboration in the works, so keep an eye out.”

She turned to you then and asked you to remind the viewers of the name of your YouTube channel. You leaned into the microphone and silently praised the lord you were able to remember it.

“Thanks so much, you two,” the reporter said with a very peppy grin. “Have a wonderful evening!”

“You, as well,” Minho answered before putting a hand in-between your shoulder blades and guiding you back to the red carpet.

Wait, he was guiding you back to the red carpet? He wasn’t... leaving?

“I’m so sorry,” he murmured in your ear, his breath causing the most delicious tingle down your spine. “I swear I wasn’t trying to be rude, I just wanted to meet you --”

“No,” you shook your head slightly. “It’s -- it’s totally fine. It wasn’t rude at all. I’m -- I just -- I’m a little overwhelmed. In a good way!”

“Totally understand. I remember my first movie premiere like it was yesterday, I know exactly how you’re feeling.”

You simply let out a nervous chuckle, but then Minho did something to make you even more nervous (which you hadn’t even been sure was possible).

He bent his arm and held out the crook of his elbow toward you.

“Shall we?”

Okay, you were now convinced this was a dream. This was all a wonderful, perfect, heavenly dream.

There was just no way that any of this could happen in real life! Being invited to Minho’s movie premiere was one thing, but him interrupting your interview on the red carpet and mentioning he wanted to film a YouTube video with you? Him offering to actually walk the red carpet with you on his arm?!

Nope. Definitely not real.

So, since this was absolutely a dream, you figured you’d just go with it!

“We shall,” you replied as a soft smile tugged at the corners of your lips.

You slid your hand into the crook of Minho’s elbow, and the two of you slowly made your way down the red carpet. Together.

It didn’t take long for you to be awed by his professionalism. When the cameras began to flash, he posed like a natural. It seemed so easy for him, but you figured it probably was easy after going through this so many times.

He murmured helpful hints and reassuring words to you as you struggled through, and he even insisted on doing his interviews with you by his side.

(Of course, before the two of you approached each reporter, he asked you quietly if you would rather have the spotlight all to yourself. He didn’t want to usurp your first experience on the red carpet and would gladly step away so you could finish the process on your own. You declined every single time.)

When you finally reached the entrance to the theatre about an hour later, you figured Minho would say it had been nice to meet you and be on his way.

But you should’ve remembered that this was a dream!

“Do you want to come inside? We can sit together during the movie if you want. I mean, you’re pretty much my unofficial date already, but you can absolutely say ‘no’ if you don’t --”

“I would love to,” you interrupted, your voice more sure and firm than it had been all evening.

But hearing your favorite actor and biggest crush of all time declare that you were his date for the night would do that to you. Plus, Minho literally exuded confidence and warmth -- you’d always thought so while watching him on a screen, and it was both relieving and exciting to learn he was exactly the same in real life.

Minho smiled at you and then led you into the theatre, your heart now basically in a constant state of flips and somersaults.

Once the two of you took your seats in front of the screen, Minho turned slightly toward you.

“I have to admit, I’ve been watching your videos a lot since I filmed the reaction for the magazine,” he said with the most attractive half-smile you’d ever seen in your life. “Seriously, thank you so much for being so supportive.”

“Oh my god, no, thank you,” you replied breathlessly. “I can’t believe you watched my videos.”

“They’re kind of addicting,” he chuckled. “I don’t know what it is, but I definitely understand why you have so many subscribers. I actually created my own YouTube account just so I could subscribe to you.”

Your eyes widened, and your heart actually stopped somersaulting because it stopped beating altogether.

“Are you serious?” you asked.

“You’re so entertaining! It feels like watching those movies and shows with a friend. And I like how you’re really honest but still nice about it. You don’t seem to have a cruel bone in your body.”

“Uh, no, I think you’re getting me mixed up with yourself,” you replied with a somewhat awkward laugh.

Minho simply grinned at you, and the somersaults started back up inside your chest.

“I was serious about wanting to film with you, though,” he said, eyebrows raised earnestly. “I would love to collab --”

“Yes, absolutely,” you reassured him as fervently as you could. “Literally whenever. Please. Yes.”

“Okay, good,” Minho chuckled before reaching into his pocket and sliding out his phone. “Here, give me your number so I can let you know when I’m free next.”

You hesitated before accepting his phone because...

What?!

Minho was giving you his phone. His actual phone. So you could put in your number? Your number?

This night just kept getting more and more unbelievable.

But you were never in a million years going to pass up the opportunity to give Choi Minho your phone number, so you took his phone and quickly added yourself as a contact.

“Perfect,” Minho murmured, almost to himself, when you handed his phone back to him. He looked at the screen for a few moments, and you noticed a soft grin pulling at his lips. And then he shifted his gaze over to you and said, “I can’t wait.”

And... as your eyes locked on his...

You had a moment.

A moment.

One of those moments you will never, ever forget as long as you lived.

One of those moments where your future basically flashed before your eyes.

Minho arriving at your house to film a video with you, a friendship forming, late night texts and phone conversations, going out to restaurants whenever he was in town... a more than friendship forming.

And you truly could’ve sworn this was not just your heart wishing, but... you honestly felt like you were going to marry this man.

“I can’t either,” you replied softly just before the lights went down.

The first thing you did when you got home was set up your camera and film a video relaying everything about your experience at Minho’s movie premiere.

Of course, you didn’t mention The Moment -- y’know, the moment you had when you realized you were most probably going to marry him? And you could just feel that it wasn’t wishful thinking? You figured it was probably best to keep that to yourself for now.

But everything else you shared with your subscribers, and you did nothing to hide how wonderful and magical it had all been -- and it had really been Minho which had made it so perfect.

“And you guys, he is truly exactly the same in person as he seems in, like, interviews and stuff. He’s so nice and so friendly and so warm and so gracious and --”

But you were interrupted by a text message.

Most of the time, you left your phone on silent as you filmed, but you’d been too excited to get all of your thoughts out that you’d forgotten to switch the sound off before turning the camera on.

“Whoops,” you murmured as you reached for your phone on your desk in front of you.

Instead of simply turning your phone on silent, though, the actual text message you’d received caught your eye and was too intriguing to ignore.

It was from a number you didn’t have saved, but your instinct to read the first few words of a message from an unknown sender took over... and you were incredibly glad it did.

Because the message was:

Hey, it’s Minho 😁 Are you free next week?

OTHER SIGNS: ARIES, TAURUS, GEMINI, CANCER, LEO, VIRGO, LIBRA, SCORPIO, CAPRICORN, AQUARIUS, PISCES

#kwritersworldnet #minho scenarios #minho imagines #minho au #minho fluff #minho fanfic #shinee scenarios #shinee imagines #shinee au #shinee fluff #shinee fanfic #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop au #kpop fluff #kpop fanfic #choi minho #shinee

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anxiousstark · 3 years

Text

One Of Us | Mitch Rapp

Word Count: 1323

A/N: Kind of different from what I normally do? In terms of how it is written.

BIG MASTERLIST | MIATCHEMBER | KO-FI

They pass me by, all of those great romances.

You clutched your coat around you, trying to stop your body from shivering, asking yourself if you were quivering due to the chill outside or the cold you felt inside you.

Your steps got longer and quicker, desiring to get to your home as soon as possible. But of course, what you wanted to avoid, seemed to be what you saw the most. A couple of teenagers embracing each other while foolishly smiling at their respective ones. An older couple entering a cafe, the old lady tightly pressing a rose to her chest, probably a gift from her husband. And then, two beautiful girls with different styles gazing at each other as if they were going to get married right there.

It's as if you are robbing me of my rightful chances.

Closing the door behind your apartment, you huffed. Your home was as cold as the outside. You rapidly hung your coat on the rack next to the door. Rubbing your hands together, you walked to the petite crystal table, where you could perceive the AC remote control. Quickly turning the heat on, your eyes drifted to a frame.

My picture clear. Everything seemed so easy.

Your trembling fingers reached out, grabbing the frame and inspecting the photograph.

The man in the picture was grinning widely. His arm was around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him. Your gaze wasn't directed on whoever had taken the picture, it was focused on him.

Pressing the frame to your chest, you sighed. And while holding back tears, you placed it back on the table. However, this time, it was lying down, which meant you couldn't view it.

And so I dealt you the blow. One of us had to go.

You sat down on the couch abruptly, your hands holding your face. And thankfully, you were able to control them going up to your hair to tug on it.

Now it's different. I want you to know.

Using the only strength you had left, you wandered to your room. Not even taking your clothes off, you let your body drop on it. The cool sheets were a little uncomfortable, but the sensation disappeared when you turned around, inhaling a familiar scent. It was his favourite cologne. The one you gifted him every Christmas because he loved it so much that he wouldn't wear anything else.

One of us is crying. One of us is lying in her lonely bed.

You laid on your back, biting your lower lip. But it didn't help. Your tears began dropping, wetting the sides of your eyes, ears, and some locks of your hair.

Staring at the ceiling. Wishing she was somewhere else instead.

The memories with the boy you love came to your mind, reminding you of those moments when nothing could get in between you two. Those beautiful memories you both shared.

One of us is only waiting for a call.

Mitch sighed, running his rough hands through his hair, finding some knots. When was the last time he was tough enough to get up from bed and shower?

His phone vibrated, making his heart beat hastily. Rapid trembling hands tried to grasp the phone, which slipped from his hands due to the sweat that covered them.

Peering at the screen, the caller wasn't the person he desired.

Sorry for himself. Feeling stupid, feeling small.

He got up from the bed, not caring to put a shirt on, even though his entire apartment was chilly. He just wanted to start the day. The sooner it started, the sooner it would end.

He closed his eyes as he walked through the hall that connected his bedroom with the kitchen, trying not to gaze at all the frames on the walls. Frames of himself with the love of his life. The person he thought he would marry. The first person ever that made him consider marriage.

Wishing he had never left at all.

He remembered the fight. This was the first time in months he would sleep in his apartment. Since he started dating you, he would sleepover, as if you guys were sharing a home.

But everything changed as Mitch Rapp was excited to tell you that Stan had offered him a new mission, an outstanding one. As exceptional as it was, it was also critical. And even though, Mitch was excited to be thriving in that mission, you were worried for him. It wouldn't be the first time he had come back to you bleeding, with a black eye or any one of his limbs embraced by a cast. God, there was one time where he came back with his memories all mixed. It took him two days, thirty-four minutes and ten seconds to remember you, and yes, you counted it.

I saw myself as a concealed attraction.

You did also remember the fight, of course, you did. Mitch and you had a good thing, you guys always discussed everything before fighting, because you both didn't want to be childish. However, that day, both of you lost your minds. You snapped at him, which made him snap back. Next thing you remember, he was yelling. Something he never did with you.

I felt you kept me away from the heat and the action.

Before you knew what was going on, Mitch had gone into your shared bedroom, grabbing some of his clothes, placing them inside his backpack.

"What are you doing?" Your voice was rough. You were trying not to cry, observing him.

"Going back to my apartment." He grumbled.

"Are you seriously going to run away?" You scoffed, using the exact words you knew were going to hurt him.

"Running away?" He turned around to gaze at you. "This job has helped me get through so many things, and you should know that!" The volume of his voice was rising. "I started this job before I knew you, and I explained to you that I enjoyed my job. We are a pack."

"Well," You started. "I thought that after settling down you would think of a more healthy job than just going around following potentially dangerous people because something could happen to you." You walked closer to him, your finger pointing his chest. "Because someday you might not come back, Mitch! Those people waiting for you, what are they supposed to do if you never come back?"

"They are supposed to move on." His voice was a little softer, contemplating the tears threatening to fall down your cheeks.

"You better than anyone else know that moving on isn't easy."

He clenched his jaw. "Then," The backpack was now hanging at his back. "I will move on for both of us." He walked to the front door, opening it."

"Are you serious?" No, you couldn't lose him. Not Mitch. As he didn't answer, closing the door behind himself without sparing you a glance, you screamed. "Just like a child! Stubborn and misconceiving!"

That's how I started the show. One of us had to go.

As Mitch was in his apartment, he noticed that it didn't feel like home. It was cold, grey and he felt blue. There wasn't someone offering him a smile, preparing his coffee perfectly, or giving him the kisses and warm he needed.

He concluded a long time ago that he couldn't live without you, but he was childish enough not to call your first. That was something you both did, wait for the other to call and apologize.

Mitch decided it had to be him, and as he clutched the phone against his ear, your voice sounded, asking what he wanted. "Now I've changed," His voice was hoarse, but you let him talk. "And I want you to know." He sighed. "One of us crying, one of us is lying in his lonely bed. Staring at the ceiling, wishing he was somewhere else instead."

Taglist: @og-baby-ob14 - @siwiecola - @linkpk88 -

People in bold means I can’t tag them.

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turnthepage11 · 3 years

Text

tw: medical discussion, mention of prescription drug use

Personal Post: Appreciate any words of encouragement but honestly just trying to throw my thoughts out to the universe.

I’m struggling so hard right now folks. For context: I am 25. I have a lot of medical issues, rheumatoid arthritis, IBS, ADHD, PCOS. And those are just my long term diseases. When I turned 18 I started having hip pain on my left side accompanied by numbness. I had assumed it was my newly diagnosed arthritis and dismissed it for a few years. Almost three years ago, I finally brought it up to my doctor and long story short, we learned I had a hip impingement which is when there is extra bone on the ball of my hip, making it hurt to walk.

I had surgery last summer for it and while they were in my body, they learned I had a pretty bad labrum tear (on a scale of 1-4, I had a 3) and they fixed it when they removed the extra bone because even though it was decently bad, it never showed up on any of my scans.

Now my surgery didn’t really fix any of my hip problems. My base level of pain was lower, but with any activity it gets pretty high, pretty quickly. (That was context, let’s get to the past 36 hours).

On Friday afternoon, I went to go sit down in my desk chair at school (you know, nothing wild) and as I sit, I felt and heard a loud POP in the front side of my left hip. I yelled so loud, one of the kids who had passed my room a few seconds prior ran back to check on me (one of my sophomores, aka my og crew from year 1).

I stood up immediately and it felt like a muscle had just cramped so I tried walking it off. Sitting hurt the most, followed by standing, then walking so I walked for thirty minutes with a pretty severe limp, hoping that it would slowly go away the more I used it.

It got a little better, not much and then I had to sit for two hours to tutor two students who were on quarantine. Then I had my hour drive home where I turned on my heated seats since usually the heat helps my hip.

Well. It made my lower back hurt INSANELY bad (when it hadn’t hurt previously. Or at least less than my hip had so I hadn’t noticed it). When I got home from my hour commute, I could barely walk and carry my backpack into the house, let alone get up the three steps into my parents’ house.

I took leftover Percocet from my surgery last summer to help with the pain Friday night and it took my 8 pain level down to a 5 and I finally managed to fall asleep.

This morning I woke up and my limp wasn’t as bad, but my hip still hurt and so did my lower back and I was at a 7 on the pain scale. Despite that, I went to breakfast with my family and took another Percocet just so I could see how I would feel around 3 when it wore off since my RA is usually pretty bad in the morning too but calms down by 12 or so and I didn’t want to be worn down from my RA pain and my injury. Even with the Percocet, I was still at 4/5 all morning.

I ended up falling asleep around 11:45 because I don’t sleep too much during the week combined with the med and woke up at 3 at a 7 on the pain scale. I asked my best friend who is a BSN if I needed to go to the ER taking all the above in consideration and the fact that the Percocet didn’t do too terribly much for my pain and she told me I needed to go asap ESPECIALLY because it was my surgery hip.

So I went to my rinky dink rural medicine hospital. They put me in a room for two hours and forgot about me until the doctor finally saw me on his list, came and saw me and said “I don’t know why the hell they put you in this room when I need you in a bed to test your range of motion.” (I was in an old closet with a phlebotomy chair.)

He did range of motion in my hip. Not the worse I’ve ever had but not great either. Said he felt how swollen I was in my hip and thought I might have retorn my labrum or even had one of the strings repairing my labrum last year break. The only thing he could do was a CT, not an MRI, to see if my hip or one of my vertabrae had came out of place. Luckily they hadn’t (though at this point I almost wish they had. It might have been an easier fix.)

He recommended I take three days off of work, go on crutches, and take it easy. I’m a middle/high school English teacher who is semestered by double periods. Missing three days of work is like missing six class days. I barely wanted crutches, I’ve walked like this for a day, how are crutches gonna help? But then I got a steroid shot and it made the pain a solid 8. The doctor kept checking on me and saw me crying so he gave me a shot of morphine and I told him I changed my mind, I wanted the crutches.

I’m hopeful that in the morning I’ll feel at least marginally better. I don’t think I will, but I’m gonna hope for it at least. He gave me steroids, Percocet for the week (which I’ll only be able to take at night because obviously I can’t teach kids while having Percocet in me), and anti nausea meds just in case. But I have to call my doctor who did the surgery for a follow up… which wouldn’t be bad except he’s four hours away. And he’s probably going to request the special MRI I got to confirm I needed surgery. Which I can only get done down where he practices. So that’s two sick days gone right there.

God forbid I actually need surgery to fix a tear FROM SITTING DOWN IN A FUCKING CHAIR. I’ll use all my sick time right there. (I only have 20 days and 3 personal. I take sick days for appointments often because of my specialist appointments and my work bestie is getting married on a Sunday in May so I’m taking a personal day for the following day.) I told my work bestie that the doctor wanted me to take three days off and she said to do it, I had the time and when I pointed out the potential for surgery, she cringed and agreed with what I said about sticking it out for the next three days.

And to top it all off, my parents are acting like I’m over exaggerating. I asked my mom to take my car and drop me off because my legs had started to go weak (which was the entire reason I went to the ER and not the pain. Because I assumed something had happened to my back for my legs to go weak.) She refused, so I drove myself. Was going to drive myself home until the doctor gave me a morphine shot. When I got in the car complaining about my hip, starting to cry about the recommendations, my dad just told me “that’s life kid, deal with it.”

I don’t feel comfortable unloading this on my coworker friends because I know this is a lot. But I’m just so… disappointed. I have lost thirty pounds this year, a major goal of my doctors but never really pushed. Got better at taking my medicine (thank you ADHD diagnosis and medication). But like, I am 25 and might have to have hip surgery… again. And my doctor had said if he had to go in again there was a high chance I would have to get a hip replacement because any additional repairs might be hard with how much damage I had done to my labrum already.

I’m tired, my body is exhausted, I’m already dreading the outcome and time off I’m going to be taking over the next month because of this. I’m annoyed by my parents’ reaction to the whole thing. I’m dreading work this week because I know everyone is going to say something about me being in crutches.

This just sucks folks. I was having such an okay school year until this decided to say “nah, sucks to be you.”

#personal #me #personal problems #in which paige is a medical hot mess

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f0xfordcomma · 3 years

Note

Hello!! Happy FFWF!! Is there anything in particular that you find hard to write? Are there any WIPs that you've just absolutely given up on cause you think it'll go nowhere?? (would you share a bit of it? :D)

Croisty! Happy ffw tuesday (which tbh is earlier than I thought I'd be able to do these, so be proud of me lol)

I wish I had more to go off of in my writing portfolio to answer this question, but I think the thing I have the hardest time writing/ have avoided writing in my wips is just unfettered angst or like horror/ violence. Like character death? Gore? Fight scenes? (ooooh baby I SUCK at fight scenes) all of /that/ is just not really my forte as a writer. Don't get me wrong, I am not opposed to hurting my characters, but hurt/comfort is more where its at for me. You've read my stuff, so you know how emotionally driven a lot of my writing is. I think I would have a hard time writing more graphic/ heartbreaking/ violent *stuff* in my style. Idk, it would probably be a good thing for me to practice.... but.... I don't wanna (hands on hips) sooooo I'm not planning to really do anything quite like that anytime soon.

As far as abandoned wips go, I've got plentyyyy (or just verrrrrrry dusty wips that are not quite abandoned but are sitting very patiently on the shelf waiting for me to have the time to get back to them) Violent/ angsty/ deathy/ fighty abandoned wips though? Not so much.

But for you, mon petit croissant, have a bit of a miraculous ladybug reveal fic that I wrote one night after having a little ~ouid~ and convincing my husband to put on a sheet face mask with me that I now have no intention of finishing (oops, rip me).

okaaaaayyy so this is actually pretty dang long lol but I'm going to share the whole thing with you because I just re-read it for the first time in months and its pretty funny ~if you ask me~ so anyway... under the cut <3

NIGHT OFF

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t a totally crazy idea to take a night off.

Besides, Shadowmoth’s akumatizations had slowed down considerably in the past few months, and he rarely ever sent out two akumas in one day. The battle that she and Chat had fought that morning was brutal, but they’d come out victorious against HoneyBadger. Still, the fight had left her exhausted and wound up. Shadowmoth was planning something, she was sure of it. She just couldn’t, for the life of her, figure out what it was.

Ladybug was stressed.

Add to that, the fact that end-of-term exams were starting up next week and she’d not had nearly enough time during dead week to actually cram. Something about black butterflies and cranky kwamis and a cheeky cat (who, in recent weeks, had been considerably less cheeky.) Not to mention, she had been receiving an awful lot of memes, seemingly without preamble, from Paris’ favorite male model. Nino thought it was hilarious. Alya thought it was suspicious. Marinette thought it was confusing.

Marinette was stressed.

All of it was stressful.

Alya knew when her best friend was stressed. She could usually gauge the amount of Marinette’s exasperation by the frequency with which her bangs went flying from her face, propelled by a huff and a heavy sigh. Right now, Marinette’s bangs were a mess.

“Okay, girl. You need a night off.”

“What? No, I’m fine! Really! Plus, I can’t really afford to take a night off right now, Alya… I don’t know what Shadowmoth ha—”

“Yeah, no. I’m stopping you right there. For the next twenty-four hours, this space is a Ladybug-talk free zone,” she gestured vaguely around her bedroom, which was scattered with printouts and pictures that Marinette had brought over to work on nailing down Hawkmoth’s possible location using Alya’s beloved akuma-map. “I know, I know. It pains me more than it pains you, truly. But I’m doing this for you. Tonight: you, me, drinks, distractions. You are taking a night off.”

“But Alya! What if—”

“Hush, you know that’s incredibly unlikely. And, in the event of this IF you are so set on, you know that cat boy and I will have your back. Even drunk ladybugs can purify akumas when they have the clawed crusaders on their side.”

“I can’t believe you gave in to his silly nickname.”

“It is a badass nickname and you are just jealous that we bonded.”

“I’m not jealous. I’m annoyed.”

“Mhmm… keep telling yourself that, girl. Now, back to the matter at hand: what kind of drunk do you want to get tonight? Classy or trashy? I still have that peach stuff from last month, but if we are thinking classy I might need to call in the reserves to get us some decent wine.”

“You won’t need to call in anybody, Al, because I am definitely not getting drunk tonight.”

“Night off, Marinette. Drunkenness is a prerequisite.”

“Can’t we just watch movies or something? I really don’t know if that’s too good of an idea…”

“Girl, we watch movies every night. This is a night off. Don’t think I don’t see you stressing all throughout movie night every week, anyway. You need to take your mind off Ladybug,” she gestured at the mess that had consumed her bedroom. “And get your mind back on Marinette. Superhero or no, you’re still a teenage girl who is supposed to be enjoying the last few months of college.”

Marinette pouted.

“Stop pouting. You know you deserve to have normal girl fun.”

“But Alya I—”

“No buts.” An unnervingly devious look crossed Alya’s face. “Unless it is your butt in that pair of skinny jeans that you and I both know you-know-who loves. Boys will be here in twenty. Get to it, girl.”

Marinette just gaped at her. She didn’t even notice that Alya had grabbed her phone, but alas, there was the tell-tale ping.

Alya Cesaire → Akuma class OGs chat

Alya: anyone down for a little last minute get together—my door is open and my bar is stocked

Nino: HELL YEAH babe!

NL: got a new mix i’ve been meaning to show you… so entertainments on me fam!

Alix: This thing got an itinerary or just drunkenness for drunkenness sake?

Alya: the latter, natch.

Alix: Sick! Count me in.

Kim: same!

Rose: Do you need us to bring anything?

Alya: anything you feel like sharing

Alya: otherwise, just yourselves!

Alya: Agreste~you better bring us some of that expensive shit that i know your pops keeps somewhere in that castle of yours

Alya: no fancy wine, no admittance

Alya: the rest of you peasants just bring wtvr

Adrien: uhhhhhhhhhh

Adrien: ALYA

Adrien: dang it! You know I feel obligated to steal wine from my dad’s cellar now

Adrien: do you know how scary my dad is!!!??

Nino: DUDEEEE

Nino: DO IT you wont!

Adrien: shuddup Nino

Marinette: Adrien you totally don’t have to! Alya is just being **extra** Alya today

Alya: i plan a night off for this girl

Alya: and this is the thanks i get??????

Alya: can ya’ll believe this?

Alya: ridiculous

Zoe: UTTERLY RIDICULOUS

Adrien: utterly ridic

Adrien: dangit

Zoe: lol first! sorry adrien

Marinette: ugh ty I guess Als xxxxx

Alya: awe she DOES care, youre welcome babe!

Alya: so sunshine… about that wine?

Adrien: yeah yeah yeah

Adrien: use my people pleasing against me why dontcha

Alya: gladly <3

“Alya, stop bullying Adrien.”

“No way, girl. Giving that boy a task is the only way to ensure he shows up. Speaking of which… butt, jeans, go, now!”

The doorbell rang. Nino had perfected the quickest route to Alya’s house from every part of Paris years ago. Yes, he was whipped; and yes, he was proud of it.

“ALYA! I have to clean all of this up and I have to go home to get those jeans that you’re so dead set on and…”

“No you don’t. Kaalki?”

“Right here, Ms. Rouge.”

“YOU USED VOYAGE TO BRING ME JEANS?”

“No way girl! Don’t be silly. Kaalki and Roaar just volunteered to be my errand kwamis.”

“You guys do realize that I am the guardian, right?”

“Of course, that’s why we worked so hard to get everything that you need for tonight.”

“I—you… wait is this my good bra? How did you—”

“Us kwamis pay attention, Marinette.” Tikki cuddled up to her cheek.

“Et tu, Tikki?”

The ladybug kwami just giggled and made her way to the pile of papers scattered across Alya’s bed, starting to organize them back into neat stacks.

“Night. Off.” Alya punctuated each word with a shove and a smack on the bum, directing Marinette toward the bathroom and shutting her in to get ready while she got the door for Nino.

#foxford just casually drops an entire dang chapter of a fic for your ffwf enjoyment #oops #miraculous ladybug #foxford writes #ml #ml season four #aged up adrienette #ffwf #ffwtuesday #thanks for asking!!#<3 #foxford answers #thatcroissantgurl #a moment of silence for my wip graveyard #cw: mentions of drunkenness #(they are old enough in france okay)

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fandom-star · 3 years

Text

Writer’s Tag

@its-all-ineffable tagged me to do this, but it’s a long one so I’m doing it in a different post! Thank you very much! I love doing these so much!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How many works do you have on AO3?

164 (possibly 165 by the weekend if I post the Witcher one I finished the other day)

What's your total AO3 word count?

181468

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

It’s Okay (Merlin: Merthur) - 569 Kudos Pulchra (Night At The Museum: Jedtavius) [NSFW] - 286 Kudos A Father’s Wisdom (Merlin: Merthur: Uther-centric) - 270 Kudos Crush (MCU Spider-Man: PeterNed) - 262 Kudos Comfort Blankets For Sleepy Gods (MCU Loki Series: Lokius) - 245

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Sometimes. I try to if I’m not in a non-social mood. Mostly, if I start off on my page before reading any fic and see that I have something in my inbox and it turns out to be a comment on my fic, then I’m more likely to reply to it. Idk why it works like that. Otherwise, it’s kinda touch and go whether or not I’ll reply to something, you’ve got a 50/50 chance, but I always read and appreciate every one that I get.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

*Looks at my abundance of angst fics* There’s... a surprising amount of angst without happy endings in my repertoire. Um. I’ll give you three that I vividly remember. (All of these are Star Trek and Spones) Written In The Stars - This is one of my really early works, and was gonna have a sequel that made it have a less angsty ending, but I could never get into the rhythm of writing it. I won’t spoil it, but this is probably the only fic I’ve written where Sarek is a straight-up dick. Battlefield - As the title suggests, there’s war with no real context. And major character death. It’s sad. I genuinely made people cry with this. I am both proud and apologetic of that. Unreal - This is probably one of my more complex concepts, and I’m really proud of it. Features ooc Spock with contextual reasons I won’t spoil, defensive/protective McCoy and major character death of a sort.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending

This is kind of difficult, bc while I have excessively written angsty endings (see: above answer) I do usually write happy endings, and I can’t remember all 160 fic endings left over, and even then it’s difficult to rank them by happiest. I like Nutcase {Murdoch Mysteries: Watts-centric) a lot, oh and also Blame It On Me (Star Trek Pricard: Hughnor) which is angst with a happy ending (and has amazing art accompanying it). There are many others with happy endings, but like I said I have no idea how to rank them by “happiest”.

Do you write crossovers? If so, What is the craziest one you’ve ever written?

I don’t really, but I have written one as a request that I really really enjoyed. A Good Day is ThorBruce and is set in the DS9 era of Star Trek, in which Thor is a captain and Bruce is his chief science officer. It’s really adorable and features sleepy, over-worked Bruce and a very characteristically happy Thor.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No, I don’t think so, unless you count unsolicited advice I felt I couldn’t turn down on ff.net when I was struggling to write Uhura. I’m kind of surprised I haven’t tbh (not that I’m complaining) since I do write for some very popular fandoms and ships (although, conversely, also some very niche fandoms and ships).

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I write it but have only ever posted it thee, four times if you count the exploratory one I posted under a pseudonym that wasn’t really that smutty. I’m hoping to get the confidence up to post some of what I’ve written tho, bc I do really like hat I’ve managed to do with some of it.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I’m aware.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, I have! A lovely person found my fic 1967, which is probably one of my favourite Spones fics I’ve written, based around the UK’s decriminalisation (well, partial) of homosexuality, and traslated it into Hungarian here. I’ve not been able to check it out, due to not knowing a thing in the language (tho I could probably ask my friend to) but the translator seemed really lovely, so I trust them to have done a good job.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not something I posted, but before I even started posting fanfic, me and my best friend really randomly started writing a Star Trek TNG x Star Wars crossover whenever they were at my house. We gave up on it after about a year and never wrote much for it, but it was... it was something.

What’s your all-time favourite ship?

This changes all the time with my hyperfixations! One that will always be in my heart is obviously Spones, my og ship and within my special interest. Currently I’m obsessed with The Witcher so I’ve got Geraskier on the mind but who knows when that might change!

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

In terms of fanfic I don’t really have any that I don’t think I’ll ever finish. I have an original script that I started writing months ago but only got about three scenes into and haven’t touched since bc I don’t actually have a plot for it.

What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue; Is situations one? That sounds like a good and fancy way of saying AUs; Finding synonyms should be one, that’s like half my search history

What are your writing weaknesses?

Description; Despite my talent of finding synonyms I feel like I do repeat words a lot; Planning and outlining, I just don’t do it - it works for me tho.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’m pretty sure the only times I’ve really done it is for Jedtavius (having Oct speak in Latin occasionally) and I might have done it once or twice with Spock speaking Vulcan, both times it’s mostly terms of endearment or Oct wanting to be romantic. Idk, I don’t really care about reading dialogue in other languages as long as there’s a translation somewhere in the work or I can easily pick it up or search it. Just do whatever, it’s your writing. As long as you do it well and it makes contextual sense, I don’t really care.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Unposted: Star Trek: The Next Gen Posted: Sherlock (I actually recently reread my first ever posted fic, it’s a long haul (just over 45k), but if anyone ever wants to see a work where my writing visibly improves lemme know and I’ll email the pdf to you)

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

Why would you do this to me??? I love most of my fics!!! I’m just gonna link a few here cause I’ve been doing this for an hour now and it would definitely take me an hour to choose just one! The Relationship Series - modern AU, autistic Spock (written by a self-projecting autistic writer), there’s angst spattered about but is especially prominent in part 6, I just really love this series Promises You Can’t Keep - Loki spoilers, I love this bc it’s based on “what if my finale theory was right instead of being debunked three minutes into the episode”, definitely angst with a hopeful ending I love all of my Charite At War fics, but I’m gonna link my 20 years post-canon fic Grow Old With Me and my modern AU You Give Me Your Light - both have some heavy topics (post-canon is set in 1960s East Germany, modern AU topics are tagged) but I adore both with my entire heart You’ll Never Burn - Merlin/Merthur, again kinda heavy (not as heavy as the Charite ones in my opinion) but short and everything is tagged I love all of my Babylon 5 fics but Secret Rendezvous will always have a special place in my heart. It’s very sweet and essentially follows Vir and Lennier trying to navigate coming out about their relationship to their ambassadors I also recommend all the of the fics I’ve already linked in the post ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Now for the hard part - tagging!

@esperata @tallysgreatestfan @iwritesometimes @marlinspirkhall and any other writer mutuals I’ve likely forgotten but I’ve already spent WAY too long writing this post asfdhdskjdgha So I apologise, but if you wanna do it, absolutely go for it, this was so much fun and really made me realise how much I’ve achieved in 4.5 years.

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lonelyreputation · 4 years

Text

Twenty-Four Hours

a/n: Hello!!! I’m back again with some more fluff!! Yay! Not even a touch of angst 😌 In this little piece of writing we have Fiancé!Shawn!! Enjoy! ALSO major thanks to @saysweartogod-og who came up with this idea when I was at a loss at how not make this prompt a cliché of saying bye to Shawn before he leaves for a tour!! Emily always showing up with her creative ideas😌😌

Also, all your nice words make me cry 🥺I love reading your thoughts!! THANKS A MILLION FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT! 💞😊

REQUEST: Pulling away from a hug that you wish would last longer

Let’s Chat!! | MASTERLIST

Warnings: None!

Word Count: 3.2K

With a wedding, there comes a lot of traditions. The bridal shower, bachelor and bachelorette parties, picking out that one dress that feels magical, rehearsal dinners, and the old wives tale of not being able to see your future spouse twenty-four hours before you walk down the aisle.

A whole twenty-four hours.

It was insane really, you had friends who had just gone the night before their wedding without seeing their future and they seemed to be doing just fine. But your mom got yourself stuck in your head with traditions this and traditions that. You didn’t know how much you believed in the myth that your marriage with Shawn would be doomed before it started if you saw him before your wedding. But you weren’t willing to take the chance. Just in case.

You had spent the day with Shawn and the bridal party, enjoying each other’s company like you did when you were teenagers. There were a lot of drinking games involved that you barely participated in, but would partner up with Shawn if he gazed at you with gentle, pleading eyes. It was going to be a long marriage if you couldn’t start saying no to him.

With having an early afternoon ceremony, it was the night before your twenty-four hours would go into effect, the last night you would spend with Shawn as his fiancé. It was a curious feeling; definitely one of excitement because you would finally be able to call Shawn your husband. But a bit odd because the more you thought about it, the more you realized that nothing would really change. You two already lived together, already had sex, and already acted like a married couple. The only change would be your last name and the extra band on your left hand that would leave your skin considerably paler than the rest.

You had just finished getting ready for bed and looked at the time. It was nearing ten o’clock and you had about fourteen hours left with Shawn until the twenty-four hour rule would come into effect. Spending a whole day a part from him seemed like torture, but it was a small price to pay for a lifetime with him.

The sound of the toilet flushing and the sink running brought you out of your thoughts. You were curled into the hotel room’s duvet when Shawn appeared shirtless from the bathroom, sweatpants hanging on his hips. He turned off the bathroom light and then made his way to the front of the room to turn all of the lights in the room off.

The darkness blanketed the room like the duvet weighing you down, but soon enough, the duvet lifted slightly off your body and you felt the mattress dip down. Shawn inched his way closer to you so you were able to feel his breath hit your face, “Hi.”

You let out a small laugh, “Hey there.”

Before you knew it, Shawn’s strong arms reached out and pulled you in close to him. A loud laugh escaped through your lips as Shawn nuzzled his head into your shoulder and pressed soft kisses on your neck. You were so content with your life right now; every heartbreak you went through before Shawn, every heartbreak you went through with Shawn…everything led you to this moment, laying in bed, with Shawn as your fiancé, feeling like everything was perfect.

“So close,” Shawn mumbled into your shoulder before he brought his head up to look at you. His face was so close to yours that you could see the excitement in his eyes, even through the pitch black, “Can’t we just elope? I wanna be able to call you my wife right now.”

You let out a laugh as you brought a hand up to his face, brushing away some of his curls, “I think both of our parents would murder us if they weren’t there.”

“Fair point,” Shawn fell back onto the mattress with a thump. The warmth that radiated off him caused you to close your eyes and scoot closer to the heat of his chest, “It’s just so close.”

You nodded her head against his chest, “Just a little over a day now.”

“And you want to do that twenty-four hour thing?”

“I mean, yeah,” you lifted your fingertips up to his stomach and started lightly drawing shapes, “Don’t want to jeopardize anything.”

He let out a deep breath, “If you really want to…” He sounded hesitant on the tradition and you poked his chest until he offered up more information, “It’s just––I think it’s a bit silly is all. We’ve been together for years, and supposedly not seeing each other for twenty-four hours will make or break our marriage?”

“We’ve gone longer without seeing each other before,” you alluded to all the times Shawn had gone on tour and you wouldn’t see him for months, “and besides,” you pressed a kiss to his cheek, “Just think about how exciting it’ll be to see me walking down the aisle.”

A fond smile crossed over his face as he brought a hand behind his head, “I’ve been dreaming about that for years now.”

A smile lit up on your face, much like Shawn’s, when the two of you thought about meeting each other at the end of the aisle. Like him, you had been dreaming of that moment for years now, probably longer than he has.

Your dreams were full of him standing with his back to yours, styled up in a sharp black tuxedo, as Brian stood by his side whispering in his ear how breathtaking you looked walking down the aisle. You could already feel it in your stomach, the giddiness mixed with the nerves that came with walking down the aisle toward a new future with the person you would love forever.

And as you fell asleep in Shawn’s arms, you dreamed of the hydrangeas lined up by the pews, the blue charm bracelet Shawn gifted to you on your first Valentine’s Day together that would be clasped around your wrist, and the look on Shawn’s face when you two were finally able to look at each other after twenty-four hours.

A dream soon to be a reality.

•••

The morning you woke up you were already wishing that you stuck to only not seeing Shawn the night before your wedding instead of the full twenty-four hours. The realization came to you when you woke up before him and lifted your head up to see him slightly snoring, one hand on his stomach as his chest moved up and down, with the corners of his lips turned upright.

Your heart ached that you were going to have to go a full day without seeing him. But you already had your rehearsal ceremony and dinner last night, so there was no excuse to have a gathering of people again.

Shawn woke up not long after you, a lazy smile on his face as he pecked your lips after saying one word that made your insides explode; tomorrow. You didn’t want to go down to the morning breakfast that was being held somewhere in the hotel for just you and your wedding guests. You wanted to spend all the time you could with your future husband.

The moment just after the two of you were fully awake were spent in silence, enjoying each other’s presence, snuggled up under the covers. It wasn’t until you were both texted by each of your mother’s requesting your presence in the breakfast room before all of the guests started showing up. Reluctantly, you two trudged to the bathroom, getting ready side by side.

You followed Shawn out of the room and reached for his hand after he pressed the down arrow for the elevator. You leaned into his side and rested your head on his arm, wanting to be as close to him as possible with your time ticking down. When the elevator came, the two of you silently stepped in as he pressed a kiss to your temple.

Even after years together, butterflies still erupted in your stomach after every gesture of affection Shawn made, and you knew that it would still ring true when you’re seventy and graying.

Thankfully, the elevator didn’t make any stops to pick anyone up, so you continued to enjoy Shawn’s company in silence. When the elevator dropped you off at the lobby, you quickly walked past the glass doors, a few screams erupting for Shawn were faintly heard, and while he would normally go out and say hi to his fans, you were his only priority for the next few days.

Once you were in the private room that held the breakfast, you saw a few family members already sitting down and eating. When your mom and Karen saw the two of you walk in, they took their napkins off their laps and walked to you with beaming smiles.

“There are the love birds,” your mom said in a sing-song voice, “How was your last night together as fiancés?”

“Relaxing,” you said as you pulled away from Karen’s hug, “We were both exhausted so we passed out.”

“Likely story,” Aaliyah said with a smirk as she passed your little group with a plate of scrambled eggs and an assortment of breakfast meat.

“Aaliyah,” Karen reprimanded her daughter, as you and Shawn both let out an awkward laugh, “If they said they fell asleep, then they fell asleep.” Karen’s hard stare on her daughter softened when she turned to face you and Shawn, “I hope you two just slept.”

“Mom,” Shawn whined as you felt your face reddened, the carpet becoming more interesting than either of your mother’s questioning gazes.

You piped up, “I swear we just slept.”

Karen patted your cheek, “Oh, honey, I believe you,” she gave you a warm smile, one that gave off the impression that she had accepted you into the family a long time ago, “I believe you more than this one,” she jabbed her thumb over at her son, which only caused him to whine even more.

As family members and friends slowly trickled in, you and Shawn would greet them together or part ways for a brief moment to make sure you thanked everyone for coming. Even though you would only be separated for a split second before you wrapped a hand around his arm, it felt too long. The rest of the morning went like that, slow and always being by each other’s side.

Breakfast was over and now you and Shawn were checking with your wedding planner to make sure everything was good to go for the big day tomorrow. Part of you was worried that something was going to go wrong. It almost seemed too good to be true that nothing had gone wrong yet, but you trusted your wedding planner when she informed you that everything was set. Only a teeny tiny weight that was lifted from your shoulders.

After the meeting with your wedding planner went better than expected, you were in a car to one of your favorite restaurants. It was just past noon, you had just under three more hours with Shawn. And much like the rest of the day, you spent the car ride in silence. This would be your final thank you said together to your guests before you were Mr. and Mrs. Shawn Mendes.

The lunch went off without a hitch; jokes shared by friends, toasts said by both of your parents, and stories told by your grandparents. You had not stopped smiling throughout the whole ordeal and that was partly due to the fact you kept gazing at your husband-to-be who sat next to you. Every time he rested a hand on your knee out of habit, you smiled. Every time he stole a piece of food off your plate, you smiled. And every time he leaned in close, his breath tickling the side of your face, to whisper how much he loved you, and only you, into your ear, you smiled.

Guests were coming up bidding you farewells and saying how they couldn’t wait for the big day tomorrow. You would laugh and agree with them; I’ve been waiting for this my entire life, Shawn would always say in response as he looked down at you with a glint of love he always held for you in his eyes.

It was quarter to three and your mother kept reminding you every ten minutes how much time you had left with Shawn. Now, it was only your closest friends and family left in the back room where lunch was held. While your families mingled and your friends laughed, you and Shawn were still sitting at your seats, chairs facing each other, knees touching.

“Can’t we just do the thing where we don’t see each other the night before?” Your voice was shaky as you squeezed the top of Shawn’s hand that was resting on your knee, “Tweak it just a little.”

Shawn let out a small laugh, “Last night you were going off about how you didn’t want to jeopardize anything, what’s changed?” You shrugged your shoulders and broke eye contact with him. “Hey, look at me,” Shawn softly whispered with care in his voice as he lifted your chin up with the tips of his fingers, “Not getting cold feet, are you?”

“Shawn,” you weren’t in the mood for joking. It was the day before your wedding and you should feel the happiest you’ve ever felt in your life. But for some reason you felt devastated. There was a weight in your chest that became heavier whenever the clock ticked closer and closer to three o’clock. You couldn’t wait for tomorrow––to finally be able to call Shawn your husband––but you didn’t want to be separated from him.

“Sorry, sorry,” he offered you a smile, but you failed to return it, “But what’s up?”

You were silent, focusing your attention on your breathing. You opened your mouth, but closed it back up quickly when you felt it go dry. You tried to swallow down your emotions, pressure building in the back of your throat as you told yourself you weren’t going to cry. You didn’t care that your jaw hurt from clenching your teeth so hard, or that the stinging behind your eyes was causing your throat to feel scratchy.

You weren’t going to cry.

With one more try, you opened your mouth to share your worries, but your mother had successfully cut you off, “Okay, lovebirds!” Her voice was far off, not wanting to disrupt the moment you two were sharing, “Officially less than ten minutes! Time to start saying your goodbyes!”

“Shawn.”

But instead of saying his name in a berating tone, you said his name out of desperation. A single tear leaked from your eye, voice cracking, as your breathing grew heavier. It seemed to click with him that you were upset about parting ways with him.

He immediately pushed his chair back, reaching down to your hand, and pulling you right up into his chest for a bone crushing hug. You pressed your cheek tight up against his chest, hands clutching the back of his shirt, no doubt wrinkling his navy button down shirt. His taut arms were wrapped equally as tight around your waist. It was a bit difficult to breathe, but that didn’t matter to you at the moment, spending time without Shawn before the wedding already felt like you were suffocating.

With each kiss he pressed to the top of your head, a tear would fall from your eye. There was no emotion other than joy that described how you felt about marrying Shawn. He was your person––your home––and you felt safe in his embrace. From the first time he hugged you, you could feel the care. He was gentle with his touches, but there was always a firmness to his hugs, a need for him to protect you.

His hugs felt like home; a place you were able to confide your deepest sorrows, a place where he made you feel safe and appreciated for the person you are.

He pressed another kiss to the top of your head as he went to pull away, but you weren’t ready, so you only wound your arms tighter around his torso. He let out a deep sigh, not wanting to be away from you either, “It’s just twenty-four hours,” he whispered only for you to hear, “Twenty-four hours in exchange for a whole life time together.”

A lifetime together.

You smiled through your tears and loosened your grip around his waist. He took advantage of the little room you gave him as he slightly bent down and wiped his thumbs under your eyes, “I can already picture you walking down the aisle,” his eyebrows were pulled together, eyes glistening with tears that had yet to spill over as he smiled, “You’re going to look so damn beautiful.”

You choked out a laugh, tears still spilling out over your eyes.

“My dreams are coming true,” a tear finally slipped past his eye, “In just twenty-four hours, I won’t need anything else in the world.”

Instead of a cry of sadness, a cry of happiness passed through you as you dove your head back into Shawn’s chest. You could feel a few pairs of eyes on you, but that didn’t concern you. Your only concern was to be as close to Shawn as possible before your mother interrupted one of your moments again.

You savored everything from the hug; the fast thump of his heart against his chest, the scent of his shirt that had made its way into your clothes that were mixed in the wash, and the security that his hands brought when he rubbed up and down your spine…you tried to memorize everything.

Your mother didn’t have to come over to break up your moment; you knew that ten minutes was up and that it was time to part ways. Shawn was first to pull away, and while you hummed into his chest in protest, you would rather have your moment ended by Shawn than your mother who was politely staying a distance away.

With his eyes closed, Shawn tilted his head to press a soft kiss to your lips, the last kiss before your wedding. The kiss tasted salty from the small tears that continued to slowly fall from both of your eyes, but you still felt him pour all of his love into it.

Reluctantly he pulled away and gently rubbed his nose against yours, “See you in twenty-four hours, Mr. Mendes.”

It was the first time today where you felt the pre-wedding jitters in your stomach disappear. The weight you felt on your shoulders, the anxiety you felt creep up your stomach; it all disappeared in that moment.

“See you in twenty-four hours, Soon-to-be Mrs. Mendes.”

#😌😌😌#some morning fluff for you 😌#or afternoon fluff or evening fluff #fluff all around!!!#enjoy it while it lasts bc I have a few angst pieces coming up!!#I'll still be writing but I have a lot of things I have saved to read and I want to get some reading in before I post something again!#as always reblog are never expected but always appreciated!!#I love you all lots!!#thanks a mILLION!!!!#Shawn mendes #Shawn Mendes fanfic #Shawn Mendes x y/n #Shawn Mendes imagine #Shawn Mendes fan fiction #Shawn Mendes fanfiction #Shawn Mendes fic #Shawn Mendes blurb #Shawn Mendes drabble #Shawn Mendes writing #Shawn Peter raul mendes #Shawn Mendes fluff #Shawn Mendes imagines #Shawn Mendes writings #Shawn Mendes fics #Shawn Mendes x reader #fluff #probs missing a few tags but I don't really care!!!!#gotta get back to work!!! :)

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muwur · 4 years

Note

If requests are open.. Suga x reader -3rd year student- where friends to pining where reader is a exchange student mid year -parent’s job- and reader is new to the school, can barely communicate Japanese and is too shy to meet new people.. reader is welcomed as a co-manager for vb club and all the other boys adopt her has their sister. She tutors them in their English lesson too.. also how would Suga help her open up from her shyness..

request: sugawara x fem! reader who is a shy exchange student!

another beginning.

✩ one-shot ✩ for sugawara bb

❧ fem reader

✎ 4.9k words

a/n: FINALLY GOT THIS BBY DONE, ty for being patient requester <3 i hope its ok, lmk if u would like smth different!

also curious but do yall listen to music when you write or read? i dnt always but when i DO i listen to some boppy music so i can shake mah ass (unles im depresso AHAHA) LMAO rec me some pls--

send me asks--

current listen: juicy by doja cat, gasolina by daddy yankee, 11 PM by maluma

A pencil dangled between two of your fingers, gently swinging back and forth as you tapped the eraser’s tip against your chin in thought. Looking over Hinata’s shoulder at the worksheet laying on the table, you extended your hand and made a neat scrawl on the page. “That’s good translating, Hinata! However,” you dragged your pencil across the surface, marking a line and arrow to point at a space near the beginning of his sentence, “keep in mind that although gerunds look like verbs, they act as nouns. So, this word should go here.”

Yachi, who was seated to your right, nodded in agreement. “I looked through his notes doodles, and it looked like they were going over gerunds in class!”

With narrowed eyes, Hinata scanned the page, muttering the sentence underneath his breath. Suddenly, his hazel eyes lit up in understanding and his lips morphed into a round “O.” “Ohhhh, that make a lot more sense! Thanks, (y/n), you’re a big help, especially in English! Also, look, guys!”

He rummaged through his cluttered backpack and fished out a slightly wrinkled sheet of paper with a red “14/50” marked on the top right corner. Holding it up proudly, he declared, “I got a better score than last time! By nine points!”

“That’s still an F,” Tsukishima pointed out, eyes glued to the pages of the book he was reading. Yamaguchi and Kageyama tried to stifle their snickers.

“Y-You’re not even looking!” Hinata defended. The ginger was met with a shrug. “I don’t need to see the score to know you failed.”

Before any fighting could break out, however, the door swung open, revealing the remaining third-years. Bags of snacks in their arms, the four of them stepped in. “We’re back! Your parent/guardian let us in, (y/n),” Sugawara announced, setting his bag down on the table. The rest followed suit and set the goodies down. Rummaging through one of the bags, Daichi pulled out a meat bun.

“Hinata, here’s your meat bun,” he said, handing the snack to the excited first-year, who had long-forgotten Tsukishima’s snide remark about his lack of intellectual aptitude. Kiyoko offered Kageyama his milk, the slight brush of their hands being enough to stir Noya and Tanaka into an envious craze. Asahi tried to settle them down, nervously reminding them that they needed to act respectful in your home, especially after your family had agreed to let you all study there. You stifled a giggle as Sugawara and Daichi joined in, scolding their underclassmen for their poor behavior and threatening them with a time-out.

With an exasperated sigh, Sugawara took a seat next to you on the mat. “Ah, I can’t help but worry about how Ennoshita’s going to handle both of them on his own.”

Giving a sidelong glance to the second-year, who was now forcing Noya and Tanaka to complete timed practice problems, your lips formed a small smile. “Looks like he does a pretty good job at it, though.”

Sugawara let out an amused huff. “Guess I’m worried over nothing. Oh, also,” he dug into the plastic bag in front of him, taking out your favorite snack and offering it to you. “Here you go.”

(can u tell from my stories yet that fav snacks aka actions are my love language--)

“Oh, thank you, Suga, I didn’t even ask for this…” you flashed him a grateful smile and took the package from his hands, suppressing the blush that threatened to overcome your cheeks as your fingertips brushed. He gave a sheepish smile and glanced to the side in response, giving the back of his neck an anxious rub.

“Ah, it’s the least I could do to thank you for letting us all come over to study. It’s really helpful. I appreciate it, (y/n).”

“It’s not much, really. I’m more than glad to help you all (read: Hinata, Kageyama, Tanaka, and Noya) out with English and offer my place. Having everyone together makes it easier. They need to pass these exams so you all get to play.”

Your offer to help the team with their studies may have seemed a simple gesture as both their friend and co-manager. On the inside, however, you really were more than happy to have everyone over for whatever reason. It left you with a feeling of awe. The last thing you would’ve expected 3 months ago was to be sitting in your new home in Japan, surrounded by a group of people who accepted you despite your poor Japanese and late appearance to Karasuno. Just 4 months ago, after you learned about your parent/guardian’s job transfer to Japan, you were left feeling an array of mixed feelings:

Anxiety – a whole new country? With a language you could barely even speak or understand? How was that going to work? Could you even make friends at school? God knows how long it took you to make the friends you have now.

Disappointment – you were looking forward to graduating high school with the friends you’ve made throughout the past few years. Having to say goodbye would be difficult, and you’d miss them.

Yet, you felt a sliver of hopefulness – new experiences were waiting for you. You had the opportunity to lead a new life in a foreign place. It filled you both with fear and exhilaration.

On the night before your first day at Karasuno, you could barely sleep after spending hours religiously practicing how to introduce yourself in Japanese. Having to introduce yourself to the class and speaking with your new classmates was inevitable, after all. And so the next day, you found yourself standing in front of the classroom, trying to suppress the nervous shudder that threatened to rack your body and ignore the prickles of sweat on your palms. Despite how much you mentally recited your introduction that morning, your current situation left your mind blank, unable to conjure any words. Fueled by the awkward silence, the numerous gazes focused on you, and the growing pit of anxiety in your stomach, what came out was a quiet, jumbled form of what you intended to say.

“Hello, (y/n) (l/n). I’m (insert your original country name here). I can’t Japanese, but I hope friends. Everyone, nice to meet,” you bowed, both in respect and so that you could hide your face, which was red from embarrassment. You knew you messed up, but you pretended otherwise, hoping that nobody would point out your mistake.

You straightened up after a few moments of silence, registering the confused looks of your new classmates and feeling another stab of shame. In response to your introduction, the teacher raised her eyebrows and blinked in confusion. Then her eyes warmed, and she offered you a smile as she spoke up. “Class, this is (l/n) (y/n). She recently moved here from (insert OG country here). She’s still learning Japanese; however, her English is perfect, so I’m sure you can all learn something from each other. Please make her feel welcome. Your seat is over there, (l/n).”

Shoulders sagging, you made your way to your desk, avoiding eye contact despite the pairs of eyes that followed you to your seat. Focusing on the lecture was a struggle. Not only could you barely understand anything the teacher was saying; worries about how the rest of the day would go also flooded your mind. This was only the morning; how could you navigate your way through the halls? Ask for directions? Would you meet people? Where would you eat lunch? How could you survive?

The remainder of the classes went by gruesomely slow. Too embarrassed from your slip this morning and too shy to meet new people despite wanting to make a friend, you successfully dodged conversation with any of your classmates. You were relieved that finally lunch came by, yet that presented another problem. You weren’t sure where to go, but you were sure that you were going to eat by yourself.

After a few minutes of walking around the hallways, you settled for eating lunch in the classroom. At least it meant you didn’t have to rush to class after the bell rang. Taking a seat, you pulled out your boxed lunch and set it out in front of you. Painfully aware of how alone you must have looked, you pretended to look really interested in your meal (am i the only one or--). You poked it, broke it into pieces, then brought each sliver to your mouth and chewed slowly. If only your family had switched your phone plans earlier, then you could at least spend time scrolling the internet or lament to your friends back home about how your day was going.

Still “engrossed” in your meal, you failed to notice a figure standing in front of your desk. Only after you saw a hand situate itself on the edge of your desk did you look up.

You met the chestnut eyes of a boy. He bore a warm smile that made a small crinkle in his eyes and beauty mark. Strands of grey hair draped naturally in front of his eyes and framed the sides of his face. Despite your unease, his soft features helped to calm your racing heart and mind. He seemed a friendly person; after all, he was able to approach you.

“Hey, you’re (l/n), right? I’m Sugawara Koushi, but you can call me Suga. I’m in your class,” he introduced in pretty darn good English.

‘Man, that means he heard me this morning…’ you thought miserably. Yet, you couldn’t help but feel some relief. Perhaps you hadn’t given others or yourself much of a chance before jumping to the conclusion that you were incapable of meeting new people.

Clearing your throat, you shyly extended a hand to him in greeting. “Yes, I’m (y/n) (l/n). Call me (y/n). It’s nice to meet you, Suga,” you replied hesitantly, finally using the correct words in Japanese that you had been practicing the previous night.

Shaking your hand, his eyes widened in pleasant surprise. “Your Japanese sounds pretty good! You just moved, so you’re still learning, right? How about I help you improve that while you help me with English?”

You were about to nod eagerly in appreciation when you both overheard some snickering across the room. Two boys and a girl sat together, whispering quite loudly and sneaking oh-so-inconspicuous glances over at your desk. Taking notice that they were caught staring, they presumed to loudly munch on their meals and talk about the weather.

Suga only shot them annoyed glare and shook his head before turning his attention back to you. “Sorry, those are my… Friends.” The strain in his voice after saying that last word made you question if they really were on friendly terms.

After that day, you found yourself spending every lunch period with Suga and his other third-year friends Daichi, Asahi, and Shimizu. You initially felt unsure of how to talk to them, but after Sugawara’s efforts to include you in his circle and some reassuring words about being yourself and not letting a small, temporary language barrier hold you back from making friends, you earned a bit of confidence. While you spoke a hybrid of English and Japanese with them, you eventually managed to pick up a lot of Japanese from talking everyday, and after these few months of constant exposure, you were able to hold decent conversations. Additionally, the extra help you sought from the teaching staff allowed you to be able to keep up in class, and your instructors were understanding enough to give you some leniency on your assignments during this adjustment period.

Hanging around your new friends often, it was only a matter of time before you were introduced to the rest of Karasuno’s boys’ volleyball team. It occurred one lunch period three weeks after you first arrived, when Asahi suggested that you join some club activities. You were discouraged, however, considering that it was already halfway through the year, you didn’t know enough Japanese yet to converse with just anyone, and you were a tad shy, which made joining clubs a bit difficult. At that moment, your new friends all made eye contact with each other, then looked at you.

“Why not join our volleyball club?” Suga asked. “Shimizu could always use the help. She’s our only student manager.”

Shimizu nodded in agreement, her blue gaze soft. “Your help would be really appreciated. There’s a lot to this job, so having someone to split the work with would be relieving. You can also help me look for someone to take my place when we graduate.”

Later that day you found yourself in the gym being blocked by Sugawara, who was protecting you from two crazed boys whose collars were held back by Daichi. A ginger-haired boy looked at you with curiosity, excitedly introducing himself as Hinata and pointing out the names of the other members on the court (“This is ‘Bakageyama’ and that guy’s ‘Four-eyed Jerk Face’—").

Upon their release (which was granted only after they promised to behave), Tanaka and Noya dashed over to you, tears in their eyes as they held your hands and expressed their gratitude for your presence. “Oh, (y/n), you kind soul, helping Shimizu with the managerial work. Better yet, now we have two cute girls to support us, this is amazing!”

And that’s how you found yourself sitting with your new friends in your living room and feeling grateful for their vibrant personalities, kindness, and acceptance. You couldn’t have asked for a better batch of friends to end your year with. Though, you were most grateful to Sugawara. If not for him, the last several months of your highschool experience may have gone by miserably, with nothing special to note and no new friends to celebrate with. His gentle, understanding nature had done nothing but support you and make you feel welcome. He helped introduce you to a new, comfortable life you had trouble imagining before your arrival to Japan. He dispelled your doubts and fears, instilling in you a newfound confidence in your abilities. It certainly helped that the team was just as supportive and patient with you.

You could recount the events of the past few months that brought warmth to your heart. These people were growing on you, making you feel like you could be yourself more each day. Daichi provided you a sense of security and leadership. Asahi was empathetic, quick to detect your feelings of uneasiness and asking you if you were okay. Shimizu made sure to make you feel welcome as a friend and fellow manager, even inviting you to a café over the weekend to brainstorm ideas on recruiting a replacement (who you both later discovered to be Yachi) and try out some desserts. Tanaka and Noya tried to teach you all the Japanese curse words they knew, initially lying to you about their meanings so they could see the rest of the team’s reactions when you would blurt things out in the middle of practice (Let’s just say that Daichi, Suga, Ennoshita, and Tsukki knew whose fault this was, and Asahi was real shook hearing a string of curse words from your mouth while you sat there, no ill intent emanating from you whatsoever). Ennoshita gave you a comforting, easygoing presence. Tsukki was… Tsukki (LOL). But he could carry on a conversation, often genuinely interested whenever you talked about the culture back in (other country). And you knew he was soft. Hinata was a burst of energy, and you found his bickering with Tsukishima and Kageyama silly and quite precious. You often stayed with Yachi to toss balls to Kageyama late at night, much to his appreciation. Yachi and Yamaguchi were some of the biggest sweethearts on the team, and all you could think about was needing to protect them.

There was definitely something different in your interactions with Sugawara, though. You found yourself closest to him out of everyone. It may have been because he was the first you talked to, or maybe it was because he was one of the most easygoing people you’ve ever met. That, and you found yourself wanting to get closer to him. You wanted to know more about him.

Sugawara chuckled in response. “I suppose you’re right. We wouldn’t have made it this far without everyone,” he said softly, a tinge of fondness showing in his brown eyes. He proceeded to take out his schoolwork and pen, resting his chin in his palm as he read the words across the page of his assignment. Occasionally, you glanced over at him, admiring the way his eyebrows knit together in concentration, and how his hair brushed his cheeks whenever his head shifted in its position. How the grey tips of lashes kissed his bottom eyelids with each flutter of his chocolate hues. You even took a mental note that his lips, currently pursed in thought, were rather smooth and full in appearance.

A rogue thought about how those lips would feel against your own flitted across your mind. It brought a small pang to your chest, and you had to mentally slap yourself back into reality. You noticed these new feelings were starting to become more prevalent the longer you hung around Sugawara. You consulted your friends back home about it, and in their excitement, they insisted you had a crush on this guy (and demanded photos). Heart palpitations, heat-flooded cheeks, covert glances, and a desire for closeness in all aspects possible? All symptoms of infatuation, your personal love doctors concluded. You recalled when these signs first appeared about a month ago, after he offered to walk you home when practice had gone late into the night. Initially you declined, not wanting him to go out of his way when it was already dark outside. However, after seeing the soft look in his eyes as he declared he wanted to ensure you got home safely and that he didn’t mind the walk, your heart couldn’t help but give in and agree.

It was a tranquil night, accompanied only by the sound of crickets chirping and a cool, whispy breeze. About 15 minutes after having left campus, you were both seated on an aged bench at a small park, snacking on recent convenience store purchases to satisfy your growling stomachs. A comfortable silence settled in the air. The nightly surroundings were illuminated by the gentle glow of several nearby lampposts and stars that burned lightyears away.

Your gaze followed the tracks of a small bug crawling across the sidewalk in front of your feet. It skittered soundlessly against the pavement, eventually disappearing in the security of a bush. A gentle sigh took hold of your attention, and your eyes flickered over to your friend, who was peering up at the star-dusted evening sky.

“Do you know what you’re doing after graduation?” he asked, a hint of wonder in his voice.

You shook your head. “No clue, to be honest. You?”

He pursed his lips and took a sidelong glance at you before focusing back upwards. “Well, I’ve always wanted to be a teacher…”

“Seems fitting. Your Japanese lessons have been really helpful,” you pointed out, smiling.

The tips of his lips curved upwards as well. “Really? I’m glad. You’ve improved a lot, too. You’re a quick learner.”

“Heh, well I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Another comfortable silence fell upon you two before he spoke again. “I was thinking about how to keep in touch with everyone after we left, and how it’s a shame we’re leaving so soon after you arrived. I would’ve liked to know you better, too, but there’s only a few months left...”

His genuine words left a rosy tinge on your cheeks. As you were thinking of a response, you looked down, noticing how close your hand lay next to his. Heartrate quickening, you stammered, “Y-Yeah, I wish we had more time, too.. T-To hang around each other, I mean. But graduation doesn’t have to mean goodbye, right?”

“That’s true... You always know just what to say, you know that, (y/n)?” he turned his gaze on you and held out an extended pinky. “Promise to talk to me after graduating, then?”

You rolled your eyes playfully and huffed in amusement. Taking your own pinky and intertwining it with his, you nodded. “So long as you keep your end of the promise, too.”

“Of course.”

Sugawara’s voice brought you out of your momentary flashback. “(Y/n)? Can I ask you a question?”

Blinking your previous thoughts away and calming the warmth on your cheeks, you responded, “What’s up?”

He slid his assignment closer to you, pointing at a section he was having trouble with. “Here. I’m not sure if I’m doing this correctly..”

You leaned in, scooching towards him and closing in on the gap between you. Focused on the homework, you failed to notice how the brush of your shoulders made Sugawara’s body stiffen slightly. With your proximity, your scent easily wafted to his nose, and he could observe the closer details of your appearance. The hair tucked behind your ear exposed your cheekbone, looking soft to the touch. Your determined hues scanned the page, and he could visualize your thinking through your small, occasional self-nods. You looked cute and comfortable in the casual hoodie you wore, bringing him a strange, mixed sense of bashfulness and ease. His mind wandered, trying to envision how you would look if you wore any of his jackets, but his thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of your sweet voice and scribbles against paper.

“It sounds great, Suga! I just made a note there on how you can fix it; otherwise, it should be okay,” you gave him a reassuring smile as you slid his work back to him. You, however, didn’t shift back to your original position and instead stayed seated mere inches from the boy. Not that he minded, but…

“O-Oh, alright, thanks!”

It made concentrating during the rest of the study session a little difficult.

Occasionally you did get up, helping mostly the first and second years with some of their English assignments. His eyes would secretly (but c’mon, everyone but Hinata and Kageyama could tell) follow your figure, admiring the way you looked as you interacted happily with the others and did whatever you could to assist them. Yet you always returned to the same spot, near Suga. Close enough that everyone else on the team took notice (if they haven’t already), relayed the information via mental telephone, and secretly agreed to depart a bit earlier than they had anticipated.

“Oh, you guys are leaving already?” you asked everyone as they were packing up their belongings.

They all nodded in response, offering up their reasons for leaving earlier than the original time you set, which ranged from, “My parents wanted me home for dinner” to “My sister’s wasted and locked out of the house, nobody’s home—” (u good der Saeko)

Standing at your doorway, you waved to your friends, sending them off with a “I’ll see you at school!” as they waved back and filed out of your home. Looking over to Suga, who was still standing beside you, you wondered, “Oh, you’re staying?”

“Oh, yeah! I was surprised to see everyone leave so soon, but I was planning to head home in another hour. B-But I can go now if you need me to..!” he answered a bit shakily, waving around his hands in small, bashful gestures.

You shook your head and you waved your hand dismissively. “It’s okay, you’re more than welcome to stay for however long you need to.”

Settled back in the common area, you both tried to resume your schoolwork, but to no avail. Groaning, you leaned back, using your arms to support you from behind. “I’m tired of workingggggg.”

He sighed in agreement, resting an elbow on the table and propping up his head in a closed fist. “Same. Do you want to do something else?”

“Hmm..” you pondered aloud. “Do you want to see my room?”

Shrugging and responding with a “why not?”, you both stood up, leaving the common area to go to your room. You opened the door and stepped inside, Suga closely trailing behind you.

“Welcome to my room. Make yourself cozy,” you insisted as you sat on your bed and pat the spot next to you. He took your offer, taking a seat beside you and looking around your bedroom in curiosity.

“Something about this place really seems like you, (y/n).”

You raised an eyebrow at his comment. “Is it the messy pile of clothes in that basket or the neat desk I cleaned up this morning?”

He chuckled and shook his head. “I suppose you could say those are part of it. I just meant there’s a lot to you that you should feel comfortable sharing with others. People are complex and there’s so many sides to a person we discover along the way. I remember how timid you were in our first weeks of knowing each other, and now you’re getting along great with everyone and work hard to improve everyday. You were able to overcome a stressful repeat of entering highschool, but this time in another country, and adapted just fine! Your kindness and determination is admirable.”

Twiddling with your fingers, you felt a sheepish grin form on your face. “Aha, you’re too kind, Suga. You know I couldn’t have made these friends or adjust so well without your help. I was too worried about talking to anyone until you came up to me, so… Thank you.”

You risked a glance towards the boy, finding his chocolate gaze already set on you. If none of your interactions in the past month had set your heart ablaze, then certainly this moment would take the cake. Sugawara’s eyes flickered downwards briefly in a moment of hesitance, then locked again onto yours with a hint of an undetectable emotion lurking behind those irises. Neither of you could bring up any words to say. The only sounds present were the soft hums of your breathing and the low creak of your bed as you found yourselves shifting your weight in order to inch closer to one another.

His mind flooded with a cacophony of emotions, from crippling nervousness to an allure for risk-taking. He could barely come to terms with the current situation and what might happen. Maybe he was overthinking it. Surely being this close face-to-face with someone who you just happen to like doesn’t automatically mean they like you back and want to kiss you just as much. Perhaps you were just leaning in to rest your head on his shoulder; after all, you did seem tired from the events of today. Or, you were scooting close for a better look at his face so you could point out, “hey, you got a little something on your face.” Perhaps a crumb from the cracker he had earlier?

But when he took note of the way your eyes fluttered shut, eyelashes caressing the tops of your dusted cheeks, his doubts began to waver. Maybe this was the chance he’s been seeking out lately. Once Daichi deciphered Sugawara’s affections for you, eventually the whole team found out and began to silently root for him. Thankfully, despite their blatant attempts to help him out, you hadn’t noticed a thing. It made him wonder whether you were oblivious, or just didn’t like him, or both. However, in this moment, when it appeared as though maybe you returned his feelings, he felt he should—as Tanaka would say—shoot his shot.

A sudden knock on the door sent you both jumping 5 feet away from each other. Frazzled and wide-eyed, you choked out a weak, “H-Hello?” in response to the interruption. The door opened, revealing your parent/guardian, who peeked inside.

“Dinner’s ready. Would you like to stay and have it with us?” they were asking Suga.

Heart still racing from the fear that gripped it, he blinked in surprise. He piped out a polite no thank you, reasoning that he didn’t want to intrude.

“Nonsense, we’re happy to have you. Come soon.”

They closed the door and left, leaving you two in an awkward silence that was soon interrupted by the sound of your cough. “We should, uh, get going…”

Standing up, you reached for the door with Suga in tow. The tension in the air remained between the two of you throughout dinner. Nevertheless, Sugawara was able to leave a good impression on your family by being a good conversationalist, even earning a few laughs from your parent/guardian. It made your heart swell at how natural it was for him to be able to get along with others.

After dinner ended and he packed his things, you stepped outside with him to send him off, closing the door behind you. He was about to salute you with a “thanks for having me over” when you gave him a peck on the cheek so sudden that he didn’t have time to react before you were already making your way back into your house.

“Thanks for coming, Suga! I’ll see you at school! Let me know when you get home!” you exclaimed animatedly, shutting the door quickly to hide your embarrassment from your sudden actions. You leaned your back against it, instantly regretting what you did with tightly shut eyes. ‘Oh gawd how am I gonna face him at school tomorrow dhefjkg.’

But on the other side of the door, Suga stood dumbfounded, hovering a hand over the area your lips had touch. Though highly embarrassed, he felt a rush of elation pass over him like a humongous wave that never stopped crashing against the shores.

He was starting to really think it was a good idea to introduce himself to the cute new girl in class. Nice one, Suga.

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