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#it probably just means he's confident in his manhood in a way that reminds me of the trans men* i know and love
uncanny-tranny · 7 months
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You know, I feel like other trans people might get this, but it's honestly kind of refreshing when a cis person has, like, undeniable tboy/tgirl/whatever swag. It's like when you come across somebody who speaks the same language as you and you only find out when they start speaking it, too.
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#all this to say that we are existing on a rock hurling through space#and this universe is going to collide into another and does it all truly matter in the end?#a lot of this is based on ideas we have about what constitutes certain people and i think it can be a fun observation#so long as you do not inherently ascribe certain traits as being indicative of who somebody Is#it can be amusing when you're SO confident that somebody is a certain way until you realize how Wrong you were#the amusement for me only comes because it's like... 'you tried your best to box somebody and you FAILED lmao'#and in a weird way it's kind of comforting because it reminds me that we all come into this world with bias that Will be challenged...#...so the best thing you can do is recognize those biases and then try to overcome them through great effort...#...so yes maybe i did think that cis dude had tboy swag but. that's not inherently his problem you know?#it probably just means he's confident in his manhood in a way that reminds me of the trans men* i know and love#i noticed that in him and it reminded me of my friends who are trans so i think 'oh! maybe that's why he's giving off those vibes!'#so while i won't treat him any differently before or after finding out i was wrong i'm still going to appreciate the fact that...#...he and i are literally just Vibing on the same planet and we both don't have time for petty arguing about manhood#i'll acknowledge what inspired those thoughts in me but that is Not his problem and that's good and beautiful actually#i don't always mind the tboy/tgirl swag meme just so long as you don't treat it like an Inherent Trans Experience Only Trans People Have#just recognize where those ideas are inspired from and it's fine <3#sometimes you will be Wrong and that's actually fucking neutral <<3#anyway rant over i just think this is /generally/ harmless and fun#like astrology. sometimes you just look up your star sign without ascribing your Entire Life to it <3#i think what i lot of people mean by saying a cis person has tboy/tgirl swag is just that...#...that cis person has an understanding of themself that comes from deep introspection that isn't necessarily expected of cis folk...#...but it is often something trans people do as part of our exploration of gender...#how is this the FIRST POST to reach tag limit... ask me for more thoughts if you want lol!
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mysterietwin · 2 years
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SCARS !!! — [ in order of how he got them ]
HONESTLY, i kinda gloss over some cartoon-isms, like falling 20 feet and being fine for comedic effect, etc etc. bUT he’s still got a lot... so uh, here ya go.
~2-INCH LINE on RIGHT SHOULDER — from the manotaur trials. i still gotta think up a specific reason bc nothing on screen was vibing with me besides seeing a scratch on his right shoulder lol, but considering there were 50...there’s plenty of off screen shit to think of lmao. mostly i just like this being a scar, because dipper is still pretty proud of it, and not for the reason you’re probably thinking...it’s a nice reminder of not having to fit into a box + the effects of toxic masculinity. he’s especially proud of it, more so as an older teen / adult, when he’s secure in his identity of nonbinary too. he ain’t got nothing to prove to anyone or himself anymore regarding ‘manhood’ or whatever that even MEANS !!
SMALL LINE on MIDDLE RIGHT KNUCKLE — from trying to punch rumble mcskirmish that one time ... mostly just bc i love rumble mcskirmish...and i wanted to. but also his pixels are really sharp!!!! ... it’s really not that noticeable, it’s just something that probably needed just a couple stitches, but we used a god damn bandaid instead.
TINY PUNCTURE on LEFT THUMB — from tiny mountain lion. also me just, thinking it’s cute. but those teeth were long and sharp, so even though it’s not really noticeable unless you’re looking for it, it is there! it’s really nothing more than a tiny indent.
~¼-INCH NICK on RIGHT EAR CARTILAGE/HELIX — torn on the fall down the stairs ... yeah...pretty obvious bill left some marks, and with falling down untreated wooden steps, that i highly doubt are well-maintained, things just...catch...it’s just a lil slit near the peak of his ear, and even though it’s pretty small, he usually lets his hair grow over it, because he hates looking at it   ( and the feelings of guilt it brings up. )   on the other hand, it’s nice to have proof it happened, and for him to stop gaslighting himself for 2 seconds...   ( who am i kidding, he’ll still gaslight himself. )
3 SMALL PUNCTURES ( x2 ) on LEFT UPPER ARM & LEFT FOREARM — from being stabbed by forks. kinda by way of the mountain lion/rumble, they aren’t super noticeable unless you’re looking for it since the prongs of a fork are pretty skinny but! ow, tbh.
~2-INCH LINE on INNER LEFT ELBOW — from alien security system crash, saving great-uncle ford. from some rubble that scraped him during the heat of the battle, probably. but! he’s very proud of this one...i mean, he fought an alien security system? at 12 years old? damn. even if not the direct cause of the scar, he can look at this one, and immediately feel those feelings of confidence + no fear that he felt when standing up to the alien tech. and considering weirdmageddon started just a bit after, he didn’t really have time to get it patched up as well as it probably should’ve been, so it scared a bit more than with professional help.
~2-INCH LINE on RIGHT CALF — from the off-screen days he spent alone during weirdmageddon. i feel like i talk abt this a lot but he spent 2-3 days on his own, alone, during an apocalypse, being hunted as Dinner and thinking everything happening is more or less his fault...and so we’ve got a physical scar during that time too. this one’s more or less in the middle of his calf on the back, but also not even from anything heroic??? i’m 80% sure it was from like climbing over a gate, and catching on something. and again, he was 12 + alone, so he didn’t really have anyone to help him with it, so it did not scar very pretty.....so, he wears pants / jeans a lot now, because this one IS noticeable, and sometimes people ask and he’s mostly just tired of being emotionally transported back to some of the worst days of his life   ( and ya know, one of the main causes of him having severe panic attacks now. )   especially since he can never actually tell the full truth about it to those who don’t know   ( which is...most people... )   unless he wants them to think he’s crazy....which is another fear of his...
~1-INCH THIN LINE on HAIRLINE/RIGHT SIDE OF FOREHEAD — from police car crash with wendy. hit his head on something while the car was rolling around, he doesn’t really know since it all happened so fast. this one...doesn’t really see the light of day as much bc his hair always grows out, he’s always wearing a baseball cap, AND hates looking at himself in the mirror...but! he’s proud of this one whenever he snags a peek. mostly because even tho not the cause, it was during his attempt to get to mabel. and...what’s more important than his sister? :’) 
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loudsuitlover · 4 years
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Doctor Harry XIII. El Pájaro Azul
A/N: This is smut, filfthy and meaningful because that’s a thing; and some angst but some fluff too. 
Thanks for all the support and the time you put not only on my story but also on talking to me, you guys are awesome! 
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INDIE’S POV
Something stirs me awake. I don’t know when I fell asleep but through sleepy eyes I can see Harry tucking me into bed. He’s left my laptop on my desk too and the only light on is the one coming from his phone screen on the bedside table.
“What are you doing?” I croak.
“Tucking you into bed, Sleeping Beauty. Fell asleep on your Brad Pitt” he jokes “seems like you don’t like him that much to me.”
I smile at his silliness and feel him press a chaste kiss on my cheek.
“Don’t leave.” I let my sleepy mind take over.
“I won’t. I’m just not sleepy yet.”
“Well, cuddle with me.” I pout with my eyes closed and feel him getting into bed next to me.
I rest my head on his chest and let him invade my senses. His scent, the sound of his heartbeat, his warmth…
“Harry”
“Yes.”
“Next time we could watch Ad Astra.”
“Please tell me you’re kidding.”
“I like that movie. You know Roy McBride actually reminds me of me.”  
“Okay, I guess this is the kind of silly things you say when you’re falling asleep.”
“He says ´so many times in my life I screwed up: I've talked when I should've listened, I've been harsh when I should've been tender´ and I’ve done that a lot.”
I feel his hands holding me. I like being this close to him.
“I am focused on the essentials, to the exclusion of all else. I'm unsure of the future but I'm not concerned. I will rely on those closest to me, and I will share their burdens, as they share mine. I will live and I will love.”
I fall asleep.
I’m cold. I shimmy to warm myself up and notice my quilt covers me up to my forehead. I finally open my eyes and realize I’m alone in my bed. Checking the time on my phone, I realize it’s four am. I remember Harry telling me he wasn’t going to leave before I fell asleep but he might have if he didn’t manage to sleep himself.
I can finally breathe through my nose without a single bother but my mouth is dry, probably because of the salty popcorn. I get up from my bed decided on drinking from the tap on the bathroom but when I make my way back towards my bed, my heart almost stops beating.
Harry’s sitting on one of the chairs on my sitting room holding his head on his hands and his elbows on his knees. He almost looks like a statue, a very sad one too, like he just lost a beloved one and it breaks my heart to see him like that.
“Are you okay?”
Harry jumps on his seat and lifts his head. I’ve scared him.
“Go back to bed.”
But I walk towards him wrapping my arms around my body. When I’m close enough and he looks up at me. I can see his eyes bloodshot and tired. He hasn’t managed to sleep.
“Leave me alone, Indie. Go back to bed.”
He’s getting mad. I can tell by the tone of his voice, harsh despite the low volume, and his tensed shoulders.
“Don’t talk to me like that.”
I confront him but still take a seat on the chair in front of him. I hug my knees to my chest to fight the cold and when I rest my temple on my knees, I see his laptop closed on the table.
When I look back at him, he’s staring at me with a hard superior gesture, as if he didn’t need me nor want me here, but I can still see the desperation or even the pain in his eyes and that’s enough for me to stay. I don’t know why he’s seems so anxious or why it’s so hard for him to sleep but I guess I don’t need to.
I think about what he told me before dinner, about him wanting me to open up and tell him things and I open my mouth to tell him about my own nightmares as I bring my hand to his hair so I can remove it from his forehead.
“Can you just leave me the fuck alone?”
I freeze on the spot.
“I’ve said it once but I’ll say it again. No one talks to me like that, much less at my own home so either you stop or you get out.”
He sighs and drops his head on his hands again, tangling his fingers on his hair and contributing to the messy look.
“Sorry, Indie… It’s just…” I can hear how tired he is. “Shit, I’m sorry, baby.”
It must be terrible, to be tired and not to be able to sleep and my heart aches for him.
“You can’t sleep?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” His tone gets harsh again but he regrets it the second his eyes meet mine. He looks like a lost puppy. “I left the fucking pills at home.”
“Why didn’t you wake me?”
“Are you a living diazepam?”
I dodge his curt behaviour. I think I deserve it but I also think this might help him understand me. We’re curt when we’re not good.
Standing up from my chair, I slowly walk towards him and feel his surprised eyes study me as I place my hands on his shoulders and push his torso so that he’s opened to me instead of closing off. His lips part and I know he’s as lost as I am. I feel his eyes calmly study me, they roam my body up and down from my neck to my feet and then back up. He takes more time in some parts than in others, but in general, it’s a complete examination of my body still in my winter pyjamas.
I can’t quite read him but it scares me that I have this effect on him. He already seems to be more calmed and the only thing I did was stand before him motionless as if I was just another piece of furniture on my sitting room. He takes a deep breath and when our eyes meet, I know what that gaze means, I know what he wants. It’s the same eyes that melt me.
With a confidence I didn’t know I have and without really knowing why, maybe to satisfy the desire I can read on him, I cup his cheek with one hand and my pulse relaxes when, not only does he not pull away, but leans into my touch. He closes his eyes and sighs and when they open again I see something in them I’m scared to describe. Not that I would know how.
Feeling brave after his acceptance, I cup his other cheek and seeping in between his legs, I lean in to kiss him. I do it like I’ve never done it before; with a softness I didn’t know I had for him, letting the shape of his lips tattoo mine. There’s no tongue, no bites, no wetness. Just a kiss, a simple kiss, yet deep but calm and reciprocated. It’s the first time we kiss like this and even though it’s literally the most superficial kiss we’ve shared for it stays on the lips, somehow it flaps around the pit of my stomach and speeds up my heartbeat.
When we pull apart, I don’t know what to do with myself so I just stare at him not knowing what that was and I don’t know whether I am curious or embarrassed sut I try to read him. Maybe if I find out what he’s feeling I can understand what I’m feeling too.
“I don’t deserve you.”
I frown. Why would he ever say something like that? I told him nasty things last night, and even though I don’t think my opinion is that important, for all I know that must be the reason he’s staying up. I don’t tell him nice things, I don’t think that’s what he needs from me right now and instead I straddle him and press my lips against his again.
The mood has completely change again. This kiss is hungry and desperate and we both are gasping and fighting for air as his hands squeeze the back of my thighs. His tongue pushes inside my mouth but this time I don’t let him have control. I bite his bottom lip hard as a way of letting him know and he moans on my mouth. I don’t know why I want to bite him but I just can’t get enough of him.
“Baby, you’re gonna make me bleed.” He groans against my mouth.
He’s right, if I don’t stop now I just might so I pull away from his mouth and unfold a spate of gentle kisses along his jawline and down his neck. I lick a stripe of his tight, soft skin from the crook of his neck to the spot below his ear as if I could take his concerns away with my mouth and feel him gasping over me. I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I’ve never wanted someone like this before but it’s like I need to be closer to him, to have him in any way I can and I can never get enough.
His hands caress my body under my sweater with a gentle touch but I know he’s going to let me be in control now. I take this opportunity to get drunk on him and to learn his body like he seems to know mine. My hands caress his bare thighs behind my own as I keep kissing every inch of his skin on his neck and upper chest. I love how hot he is and how I can feel his muscles with my lips.
I kiss every freckle and lick the ink of his tattoos and feel myself getting wetter just by watching the soft hair on his chest. He’s so sexy it’s ridiculous. I want to touch myself so badly, my lips clench out of their own accord as I just drink him in but he’s so perfect and so warm and he’s here in all his glory just for me.
I get off from his lap and his green eyes shoot me a hint of panic but his lips part and his breathing gets worked up when I sit on my knees between his legs. I want to suck him off so much and it surprises me that the idea of having a dick in my mouth can be so enticing. I don’t know why I’m feeling like this but I’ve never been more turned on in my life and it doesn’t really make much sense to me because objectively, what do I get from sucking him off?
He's so quiet and I can’t read the way he’s looking at me. If I didn’t know any better I’d think he’s scared of me but when my eyes look down at his crotch, my breath catches in my throat when I see how hard he is for me. I lick my lips, my mouth is getting dry.
I bring my hand to his harden length and am surprised at my own confidence as I start pampering him through his boxers while my trail of kisses guide my hungry mouth to his arousal. I look up into his eyes as my fingers tangle with the hem of his boxers on either side of his hips, silently asking for his permission to put them down and I love the way he looks with lips parted and eyes wide opened as he lifts his hips for me to undress him.
My eyes still widen at his perfect erection. It’s everything I think about when I think about sex. Healthy and hard and wet and blood red. I wrap my hand around the base of his manhood and kiss his skin before I lick my way to the top. I look up at him and am gratified with a imagine of Harry biting his bottom lip, his chest wildly inflating and deflating every time he takes a breath.
I caress his length with a warm hand a few times before really holding him from the base and licking him like a kitten would lick an ice cream. I keep the eye contact and almost laugh when I remember what Olivia guessed about me. This is turning me on more than it should, I’m sure.
I wrap my mouth around his length and every time I bow my head I get him deeper and deeper, moisturising him with my hot saliva until I fill my throat with his tight, hot, throbbing length. Watching him I understand the thrill he gets every time he does this for me. It’s delightful to see the other person’s reaction.
Harry’s gasps, moans and grunts seduce and claim me as he fills my mouth. My sole purpose is keeping his sex as moisturise as possible as my hand massages the soft pearls crowning the baseline. I relax my jaw and try to keep my teeth to myself as he slips inside my mouth once and again, in and out, forth and back. My bowing is aided with his gentle thrusts but his intrusion only arouses me even more. His hand reaches out for my head and he whispers something I miss. I’m completely consumed by the way he sounds inside me.
He pulls from my hair and I supress my moans until I can’t hold them in anymore and let out a long throaty moan over him. He growls and curses and his fingers, tangled in my hair, slow my bows down.
“Go slower, baby.” He pleads. “I’m gonna cum otherwise.”
Isn’t that what this is all about? With a popping sound, I get him out of my mouth and admire how shinny he is with my own saliva covering his slick skin. It surprises me that it doesn’t look disgusting to me. Moreover, the thought of him, this wet, stretching my tight walls is driving me crazy. I suck his balls into my mouth as I pump him.
“Shit.”
I can tell he’s holding back again. I want to confront him about that because I don’t like when he holds back with me. He’s had me hard before and only picturing him fucking my mouth without any inhibitions, holding my head as he intrudes my throat in and out, brutally, choking me has me dripping down my thighs.
I start devouring him faster, sucking him inside my mouth and letting my tongue lick his precum as he grunts and pulls from my hair. A thought flashes through my mind, I want to see him and so I look up at him from behind my eyelashes and I see his jaw clenching and he frowns.
“Fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum.”
I only suck him harder, bobbing my head frantically as I help my mouth with my hand in the part I can’t get inside and within seconds I feel hot, creamy spurts of his cum hitting my throat. I swallow it instantly for it shot deep enough for me not to have a choice and I feel my pulse down my lower lips as I lick my own lips and sit on my bottom, watching his chest go up and down in a frenzy whilst he calms down.
I’m out of breath too and my walls are tighter than ever because I can’t seem to relax them and I feel like I have my own fluids all over my inner thighs. I don’t know in what perverted way I’m looking at him but the way his eyes twinkle tells me he knows.
Very calmly and without saying a word, as if I had not just sucked him off, he offers me his hand and pulls me up from the floor and then he stands up from his chair so that he’s taller than me again.
I look up into the green of his eyes and he just stares at me for the longest time and there’s not a trace of a smile on his face but somehow he doesn’t seem serious either. I don’t know how to explain it. He seems… Intense, I guess that’s the only thing I can tell. His eyes never leave mine as he pulls from the hem of my pyjama pants with one hand and the other sticks to my belly, snaking down underneath my underwear until he touches the place I want him the most. He lets out a nervous giggle when he finds out how wet I am but I am so turned on I don’t even have it in me to feel embarrassed. He chooses not to torture me as he presses three fingers against my clit and starts fondling me with just the right pressure and my eyes roll to the back of my head as I moan out loud for him.
It's like the intense, serious Harry that let me have him in my mouth just minutes ago is suddenly gone and I can’t say I miss him when this cheerful, careless Harry is smiling at me. My hips start lifting from the table he pushed me at and they find his hand on their own accord, amusing him.
I gape and try to hold his gaze fighting my own eyelids and when I’m afraid my legs are going to fail me and I’m going to fall, I cling onto his bare shoulders with my hands and he rests his forehead on mine. Intense Harry is back. Our breaths mix together between our parted lips and as much as I want to see him my eyelids cover my eyes and I don’t fight them, feeling him is enough. When two of his fingers slid inside me while his thumb still massages my clit, it takes him less than a minute to have me arching my back and screaming.
His hand stays pressed against my dripping core as he kisses my opened mouth trying to give back some of the calm he took from me and he holds my low back with his other hand pressing my body to his. He tenderly bites down my plump bottom lip and pulls from it until it slips from his white teeth.
I think something just disappeared. I feel like he saw me naked for the first time and I’m still wearing all my clothes.
I pull away from him. Not in a rush way or even in a bad one, but I’m overwhelmed. I close the bathroom door behind me and rest my open hands on the marble sink and stare at myself in the mirror. It’s happening again. I need to lie down and put an order to my running thoughts but right now all I can do is cry.
It surprises me that he gives me this minute to myself so quietly and when I open the door, after having washed my face and remove my dripping underwear, I find him still sitting down on the chair I found him at first but now he’s got his sweater on. I open a drawer and get fresh undies on before I go look for him.
“Come here.” I tell him.
He sighs and gives me a look as if saying a blowjob is still not diazepam. He opens his mouth to protest but I don’t let him.
“Come on” I insist “let me help you.”
“Are you going to tire me out with sex?” He smiles.
“No, you idiot.”
He shrugs feigning disappointment before he follows me inside my room and watches me as I get under the blankets holding them up for him.
“Lie down on your stomach.”
He stands very still, cautiously watching me as if I was some sort of dangerous animal, but after some hesitation he chooses to trust me and does what he’s told. He’s watching me as I lean over his body and pull the cover up his bottom before I slip my hand under his sweater and start drawing figures with my nails on his back.
I don’t know if this will relax him as much as it relaxes me but this never fails to calm me down and get me sleepy. I think everybody likes these fingertip caresses. He can’t be that different to the rest of us. Plus, he’s wasted, he’ll fall asleep sooner or later.
After a couple of minutes, he suddenly sits up and it saddens me that he put up with my pampering for so little time but I try to supress my smile when I realize he’s just taking off his sweater so I have better access to his skin. I don’t want him to think I’m only doing this for him, I like touching him just as much as he likes to be touched, not just on the place that makes him a man.
He doesn’t take his eyes off him and he’s the most serious he’s been all night. I want to ask him what’s troubling him but I just cried myself a few minutes ago, who am I to judge him? I feel his muscles relax under my fingers and it’s so nice to caress him like this, he’s so soft it’s pleasurable to touch.
I take this moment of silence to try and unravel my own messy thoughts. I feel terrible for doing this to Dylan and I am scared shitless for doing this to myself but the truth is I care about Harry more than I dare to admit. I don’t want him to be sad or worried, not because that makes things bad for myself but because I just don’t want him to suffer.
He's so quiet and still I have to look up at him to check whether he’s asleep but his eyes are opened and still studying me.
“What’s on your mind?” I whisper.
“Nothing nice.”
I frown, but this time it’s not out of anger but out of concern. I guess he could have asked me the same thing and the answer would have been the same.
“Is it because of something I said to you?”
He doesn’t answer but that’s all the answer I need. It surprises me that my opinion can give him such a headache. I didn’t know whatever I could think about him was so important to him. He didn’t strike me like the kind of person who would care about what the rest of people thought of him what with all the times he’s tried to convinced me that I shouldn’t care about what people thought about us, and how naturally he just says whatever is on his mind and all that.
“Listen, Harry, I was mad and I’m such a bitch, you gotta know this. When I’m mad I say these things I don’t even mean just because-”
“It’s not about what you said before dinner.”
That surprises me.
“Then what is it?”
“Do you remember when I told you to stop beating yourself?”
I remember that night perfectly fine. That was the night he had his anxiety thing and I went home with him. That was also the night this whole thing really started.
“And every time I’ve told you to just let go and enjoy life?”
I nod. I also remember when he told me there was not enough Indie on my heart and how many times he’s pointed at the lack of life in me, knowingly or not. I swallow.
“Well that’s something that happens to me too and a lot more often than you think.” He smiles as if he knew perfectly fine what I thought of him and also how wrong I am. “I don’t know if you remember but before you fell asleep you started reciting these Roy McBride’s lines and it just got me thinking about a lot of things.”
I instantly blush. That I recited what? Nobody even knows how I secretly feel about Roy McBride and how identified I felt with some of the things he said during the movie. Oh, God, I hope I didn’t tell him that.
“About what things?”
Our voices are low even if no one can hear us.
“My life.” He starts as if I should have known better. “My thesis really did open so many doors for me but then I kind of just started working like that was all that mattered because somehow it was.” He pauses and his green eyes give me a look I don’t understand. “I got myself crazy busy with work so that I didn’t have to think about how… I had nothing else to… Worry about.”
I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way before but I don’t like it. It’s like someone punched me on the stomach and I want to cry and tell him he never can say those words again but he’s opening up to me and I bet telling me this is not easy on him so I won’t shush him and make him feel as if his feelings are wrong. Yet this is breaking my heart.
“Don’t get me wrong, I love my job and I love actually knowing who my patients are and hearing them out and giving them the time they deserve but… Sometimes I do worry that’s not enough and when you said all that shit to me about relying on those closest to you and sharing their burdens and letting them share yours and living and loving I just… I don’t know how long it’s been since I don’t do that.”
My fingers stop their movement on his back. I’ve been so unfair to him. I had no idea he had all these cloudy thoughts on his mind and that the reason he couldn’t sleep was because at night he sets them free like a snake. That has me thinking. Does he have a burden too? Is he afraid of sharing that too? Does he feel as lonely as I do?
I don’t know exactly from where I’m getting the strength is taking me to stay out of this and focus on him. I guess I’ve become so good at tiptoeing over my own feelings without getting in that I don’t even have to think about it so as to do it. It just comes natural to me.
“Have you never had like a turning point in your life? Where you had to reconsider what you were doing and if it was what you wanted or not?”
I watch my own fingers dancing over his back and nothing happens I don’t know how long for. Nobody says anything and nobody moves so I wonder if he even heard me but when I look up at his eyes, I feel like my throat is going to close and I’ll choke on my own woe. Crystal tears blurry his eyes and I want nothing more but for them to never spill out. It’s affecting me enormously to see him like this but it’s just too vulnerable, too close, and I can’t do nothing to take that away from him. I have no idea what my words have brought to his mind but he’s just passing it all on me. I hate that my own eyes fill with tears. God, this is not about me.
I don’t know what to do so I just wrap my arms around his shoulders and press him against my chest and he hugs me too. If he had done this to me, if he had made me talk until I ended up bursting my own protection bubble and crying, I would never forgive him so all of a sudden I feel so terribly guilty I want to scratch my own face until I bleed.
“I’m so sorry, Harry” I whisper on his ear as I hug him tight “Forget it, forget what I said and sleep, love.”
He slowly pulls away from me so he can rest his head on his pillow and closes his eyes and thank God the tears don’t roll down his cheeks, but I can see them on the inner corner of his eye next to his nose.
My fingers continue their voyage across his skin and I’d pay to have that frown removed from his beautiful face. I comb his hair out of his forehead praying to God he won’t pull away from me. To my relief, he doesn’t react to my touch and lets me pulls his hair away from his troubled face. We don’t normally do this, this cuddling in a non-sexual way, but I guess we don’t normally cry to each other either.
I let my head fall on my own arm and keep caressing his back until I fall asleep. I hope he falls asleep too.
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Can you do a scenario for Law s/o can take people souls and body parts (likes Law) so she decides to take something of Laws that calls himself a man (if you know what I'm mean) and hides to where he can't find her, she calls him on his transponder snail and tells him she that she wants to play a game. She torture Law by pleasuring him very slow until he's a moaning mess (like screaming and begging) later that day Law gets revenge. Can you make it a long and rough NSFW please.
LOVE how Tumblr just randomly decided to reload the site while I was finishing this up so I could re-do all of my changes again :)
I hope I got this right and that youdon’t mind, but I changed certain things up a little bit (mainly by having Law accidentally givehis girlfriend the ‘you-know-what’ and forgetting to take it backinstead xD
This goes without saying but big warning for some odd(?) filth under the cut~!
Dirty Law scenario: Taken
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A goddamn fool. That’s the term Lawwould use to describe himself right now. His hands were shaking as hestared down at the bowl sitting right infront of him, almost as ifthis ‘special soup á la Bepo’ held the answer to all of hisquestions, especially those concerning his current situation. The surgeons cheeks wereflushed and sweat ran down his forehead as he impatiently bounced hislegs against the ground, sometimes loud enough to distract from allthe little groans that escaped from his throat. How the hell did he forget?How the hell could he forget?! For a moment his eyes wandered down to his lapto check again and make sure that this wasn’t just an awful dream-but no, there was indeed nothing there. Another groan escaped hislips as he looked across the table, past all the concerned lookingcrewmates that hesitantly slurped their soup, and right into the eyesof the culprit. A faux innocent smile was dancing on (Y/N)’s lipsas she slowly lifted her spoon while wiggling her eyebrows in Law’s direction as she noticed his staring. How. Dare. She.
Said man clenched his teeth andmuttered a low curse before lowering his gaze to look at the souponce more. Oh, this was far from being over.
Last night certainly was wild- after all, both he and (Y/N)did all sorts of crazy stuff to work off their desperation and pent up tension- and while it felt amazing to completely let go of allworries and concerns for a brief moment, the surgeon made a terriblemistake. At some point he… god, Law couldn’t even remember how exactly ithappened, but he must have…. 'taken off’ his dick and handed it to(Y/N) so she could have some ‘fun’ while he probably watched (which was, to be honest, one ofthe hottest things they ever added to their collections of odd kinks),but- appearantly, Law must have forgotten to… ‘reattach’ it afterwards. So the next morning, while stillfeeling calm and relaxed from the great sex, the grumpy pirate was quickto notice that his girlfriend was missing from the bed. Must have gotten up early,he quickly assumed and walked into the bathroom to get ready himself,which was when he noticed. Something was wrong. Or, to be morespecific, something was missing. An until this point unknown feeling of panic immediately spread through hiswhole body and mind, the former state of relaxation now completelygone as Law tried to recall what exactly happened to his cock lastnight.
And then the call.
God forbid that you just leave him be for one day and not pull something that would get Law all worked upagain. What kind of game was this to you? Hiding from him, evadinghim- even threatening to hurt his manhood if he’d dare to come lookfor you!!! This whole day was just pure torture, you were clearly using thissituation for your own sick amusement while he was forced to walk around thesubmarine, barely able to go on with his daily chores and things whiletrying to repress any urges rising up- because clearly you weresomewhere, playing with him (or rather, his cock) while he had to stay strong and endure all ofit. And ontop of that, you even had the gall to show up to lunch withthat huge smile on your face and a little box by your side- oh Law knewwhat was inside but couldn’t do anything about it- which you were aware of, of course. I mean, imagine ifhis crewmates caught wind of this? No, he would not deal with that, might as well open a hatch and drown himself in the sea.Clearly you must have had some sort of wicked plan or perhaps just felt confident enough to make such a bold move, because now the surgeon wassitting across from you with his whole body shaking while you allowedyour hand to wander into the box every now and then to edge him on even further.
Oh you were going to pay dearly forthis, Law silently swore to himself while his eyes burned a hole into the bowlwith soup infront of him. Luckily the awkward lunch break didn’tlast too long either, and after a few small spoons of what he assumed to be simple cabbage water the young surgeon rosefrom the table to head into the direction of his room, but notbefore coldly staring at you once more and basically giving you the silent orderto come along. A small giggle escaped your tender lips as you stoodup as well and grabbed the box, which was already rumored to hold some sortof forbidden treasure by Shachi and Penguin, and quickly followedafter your boyfriend. However, much to your suprise, Law almost immediately seemed to vanish from your sight as you exited the kitchen to accompany him through the hallway- but with a simple shrug you carried on, humminghappily as you made your way into his large bedroom. Well, and fromthere on out things got… wild. again.
You barely managed to fully enter the room as thedoor already slammed shut behind you, and a cold hand quickly wrapped itself around yourwrist and basically pushed you against the wall. Upon looking up you came faceto face with your boyfriend, who was still gritting his teeth with aflushed expression dancing on his tired features. That sight alone already caused another giggle toescape from you as you tightly held onto the box- which was undoubtlythe thing Law was after, even if his eyes were locked on your face.
„I think you have something thatbelongs to me…“ was all he managed to get out, his voice sounding strained and hoarse as his hand slightly squeezed your wrist. But instead of giving in and ending this little game as well as his desperation, you decided to continueteasing him. „Mh… do I now? I think you’ll have toremind me,“ you pouted and blinked a few times to fakeignorance, but a moment later Law’s other hand slammed againstthe wall right next to your face, his expression furious as he slowlypressed himself against you in an attempt to keep you trapped between the wall and his body.
„Enough with the games, (Y/N)-ya,“the young man growled and lowered his gaze, seemingly prepared to just go ahead andgrab the box- but you were faster and quickly freed your hand from his grip andreached inside of it, giving its content a tight squeeze. Lawimmediately threw his head back as he started to hiss with unbearablepleasure and pain as you reminded him of who it was that had the upperhand.
„Your tone seems pretty pointed rightnow… why don’t you relax a bit~?“ you smirked and started to rub alonghis shaft again, which was already stuck in a constant state of hardness thanks toyour treatment. But of course you would always stop with touching it before Law couldactually come. All this pent up pleasure and the need to release made your boyfriend feel and look quite animalistic, after all he found himself close to losing itmultiple times throughout the day. But now that you were right there infront of him, enough was enough.
„AAAAH!!“ you suddenly started toshriek as your back rubbed against the wall- Law was nowlooming over you with his face only inches away from yours, and thehand that had previously grasped your wrist was now forcing its wayinto your pants, where it immediately started to rub against the fabric of yourpanties. And as expected, carrying his dick around all day did havean effect on you as well, which caused him to groan with relief. Now you weren’t exactly 'wet’, butLaw could clearly feel the heat that was radiating off of your core.Out of habit your hips started to grind against his coldhand, which immediately send a shiver down your spine as youtightened your grip around his manhood, forcing the surgeon release another loudgroan.
„Not so much fun getting roughenedup, right (Y/N)-ya?“ he growled and aggressively pinched your sensitive nub through your panties, which caused you to cry out in amix of pleasure and pain. „Hnnn… you…“ a disappointedwhimper left your lips as you paid him back by vigorously stroking along his shaft, but that only encouraged Law to rub against your still clothed entrance even faster.
„Whatever you do, now that I got you right here… I can pay you backeven worse,“ he whispered hoarsely and quickly pushed yourpanties aside to insert a single digit into your womanhood, causingyou to arch your back and press yourself against him with need. Truthto be told, having him treat you roughly like this after what you puthim through this day was actually exactly what you had anticipated,and the way Law looked at you, almost as if he was a feral beast…it was too much to handle. A loud moan escaped from your throat asyour hand held onto his arm while he continued to finger you, but unfortunately his mind wasn’t really as clouded as you had expected,and that small moment of carelessness from you was enough for Law to smirk ashe quickly pulled the box from you and almost jumped backwards, causinghis fingers to leave your hot womanhood in the process. „E-Eh…?“you blinked a few times as you noticed that the box as well as his hands and body were gone, and upon looking back at your boyfriend you couldn’t help butpout. Seems like your little game came to an early conclusion…
„Oh… not fair! You tricked me!“you huffed with faked anger as Law reached inside the box, seeminglyignoring you in the process, and pulled out his hard and erect cock. „Goddamn it, (Y/N)-ya…“ he hissedthrough clenched teeth as holding his manhood alone already send morepleasure down his body, but then a quick look at your squirming figure caused a light bulb to suddenly go off inhis mind as Law‘s eyes locked on you- or, more specifically- acertain spot between your legs… 
Within the blink of an eye he waslooming over you again, his face cold and unmoving as he quicklypulled both your pants and panties down with one swift motion. „L-Law?“ you tilted your head tothe side as you reached out to wrap your arms around your boyfriendfor support, unsure on what he was going to do. I mean… judging byhis actions you’d assume that he was going to fuck you like usual, but… Hisdick was still not where it belonged, so what was he doing?!
„I bet you had a lot of fun doingthis last night, (Y/N)-ya… Too bad I can’t remember most of it, butperhaps this’ll help jog my memory…?“ he muttered and spreadyour legs with one hand while the other one was tightly holding ontohis still detached dick, now bringing it closer and closer to yourbo- oh. Was this it? Your eyes widened with shock as he suddenlyrammed his length inside of you, immediately causing your eyes to rollback with pleasure as he pulled it out again, only to slam it rightback in. You could feel his hot and ragged breathing as sweat randown Law’s browbone; his eyes were half-closed as he moved hisdick in and out of your dripping core at a fast pace. This was the sort of relief hewas seeking the whole day because of you and your ‘game’, and it didn’t matterwhether it was his hips or hands that allowed him to bury himself inside of yourdepths, he just needed to feel you. His hand speed up more and more as moan after moan rolled offyour tongue, your walls tightly clenched around him as the sight of Law fucking you with his detached dick only turned you on more and more.
Neither one of you was able to keep this going for long though, and after a few more powerful thrusts you felt your orgasm approaching- which caused Law to groan and lift one of your legs over his shoulder so hecould thrust in even deeper and fully bury himself in your warmth until he reached his climax and paintedyour insides white. His hand was keeping a tight hold on the base of his cock as his entire body began to shake, and a moment later you released a loud cry of your own to signal that you reached the edge as well.
Did he ever manage to fuck you that deep before…? Probably not, and as you tried to calm down yourbreathing your gaze wandered down to his now stained dick stillresting in his hand, which caused a small laugh to mix in with your panting. Your arms were still wrapped around his neck as you leaned forward topress a playful kiss to his warm cheek before whispering:
„So… are you all better? Then, can I have my little toy back now~?“
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erotica-couple · 4 years
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Honey... I Fucked Up (Part 1)
I’m not particularly proud of the events I’m about to describe, but they are what they are. Still, contrary to the famous adage, this story is probably proof that the greatest of ends can sometimes indeed be achieved by the basest of means.
What I remember about that day is… quite confusing. Some of it I remember with crystal clarity, but other parts of it are a haze. I was having a late night with the girls. It wasn’t a particularly special one – we’d been on benders like this one time and time again. The only difference was that before this night, I had taken a pretty long break (almost a year) from carousing with my girlfriends after settling down with a guy I was particularly enamored with. It wasn’t every day that I met a man I wanted to wake up to over, and over again, so I took the effort to stave off partying while I focused on building our relationship together. 
 Things had been going beautifully between us, and I was sure I loved this guy. We’d even gone out and found an apartment together, and while that might not be a huge step for some people, it was for me. Before meeting Charlie, I had never even been mildly interested in setting up shop with a man. I was, as my girlfriends often reminded me, naturally averse to long-term commitments, and the fact that I’d stuck it out for almost a year with Charlie floored some of my closest friends. There was something magnetic about him – he was charming, funny, sweet – not at all possessive. He wasn’t a psycho, like some of the men before him, but he wasn’t boring either.
 In short, it had been awhile since I’d been out on the town. I didn’t go out that night with the intention of being unfaithful, obviously. In fact, I had told myself I was going to keep the alcohol intake to a minimum and try to get my high off the music. The club we had been planning to hit up that night had a DJ playing that week that I was really into, so I was confident at the time that that alone would be enough to get me going for the night. 
 As with all such promises to oneself, my optimistic pledge fell apart quite quickly. At the behest of my particularly unhinged friend Cheryl, I knocked back a few too many shots of vodka and was completely lost in the music, the crowd and the thumping, pumping atmosphere. My hips were winding, my hair was swinging, and I was thoroughly enjoying myself.
 That was when he showed up. One of the (very) few things I remembered about him was the smell of his perfume – fuck me, it was strong. The masculine scent shot through my nostrils, and it made me take note of his presence immediately. I was a sucker for manly, woody smells and just the thought of the kind of man he might be was enough to send a tingle of excitement down my spine. Seconds after he pushed up against me, I felt his hands rest on my hips, and his stubble grazing up against my cheek as his lips pressed up to my left ear. 
 “You’re sexy,” was all he said, in some fucking erotic, exotic accent.
 I remember instantly swooning in his firm, masculine grasp. 
With alcohol coursing through my veins, it didn’t take long for things to get more risqué. My hips were gyrating against his, swinging to the rhythm of the music, and his hands were all over me. I should have stopped him when he reached up to my breasts and squeezed them through my dress in his large, rough hands, but I just… couldn’t. I’d barely caught a glimpse of his face, but his aura… it was so commanding, so gripping, that I let him touch me wherever he wanted to. 
 Still, even at that point, I didn’t expect things to go much further. I knew we would fondle on the dancefloor, and I knew I would probably soon succumb to the curiosity of wanting to feel his crotch in my hands through his jeans, but I told myself I would end the tryst the moment he asked me back to his place.
 Still, everything felt wrong. I would like to pretend like I thought harder about what I was doing, that I did my best to resist temptation but yet succumbed after an immense battle of the wills, but that would’ve been a lie. I had barely put up a fight. From the moment the stranger laid his hands on my hips, I was putty in his hands. Every base pleasure in my life before Charlie, every careless tryst I’d had, every meaningless fuck I’d spread my legs for – those were the things this stranger represented to me. He was everything I used to be, everything I thought I’d escaped from in the last year. In under fifteen minutes, he’d shattered any idealistic notion I had that I could live a quiet, ‘normal’, muted life. He reminded me, as his hands slipped under my dress and against my naked body, that I was a fucking slut, and that I loved every second of being one.
 The girls had seen what was happening, and I wanted to hate myself for proving them right again – for proving them right that my thing with Charlie wouldn’t last, for proving them right that I couldn’t keep my legs closed in the presence of a rugged, studly man – but I didn’t. Don’t get me wrong – I loved Charlie. He was the only man in years that had held any weight in my hustle-bustle of a love-life, the only one that felt like he truly, truly mattered. But that didn’t change the fact that I was weak, and it didn’t change the fact that I was irresponsibly insatiable. Even as I felt a deep, nagging guilt towards Charlie, my body continued to acknowledge that the stranger groped me in all the right ways. I was wet. I was so fucking wet for him.
 This was where things got hazy. The stranger put his lips to my left ear again and told me to follow him. I knew where things were going, but I put off my earlier resolution to put a stop to things for just a little longer. I wanted to feel his cock in my hands first, just for a tiny, tiny second. Then, I told myself would go back to Charlie and beg him for his forgiveness.  
 But my plans must have changed, because the next thing I remember in my clouded cocktail of alcohol, adrenaline and ravenous desire, was finding myself in the toilet in the back of the club, closed in a stall with the man. Maybe I’d succumbed because I had already felt how big he was when he was grinding up behind on me on the dance floor – that’s how big he was, I literally felt him on my ass through his fucking jeans – and I knew what was going to happen next, or maybe I was still lying to myself; lying to myself that I wasn’t about to go all the way with a stranger I’d only met fifteen minutes ago.
 When the man pulled his trousers off and I saw the length of his cock, I’ll never forget how quickly my jaw dropped. Before I’d seen his rod, I was still aware enough of what I was doing to feel pretty shitty about the whole thing – I had something good with my boyfriend and was disappointed with how easily I’d submitted to some fucking handsy, muscular douchebag in a club. But the moment I saw that thing, I knew I wasn’t just going to tug him off and have him cum on my thighs. I knew I was going to spread my already dripping, warm cunt for him right in that dingy stall, and that he was going to fuck me good when I did.
 I didn’t resist when he pushed me up against the stall and snaked his thick, fat cock right under my dress and up to my pussy. It slipped in easy. His head pushed into me, and when the rest of that thick, throbbing shaft followed my knees buckled immediately and I screamed in fucking ecstasy. It was SO much bigger than anything I’d had, and after months of just taking my boyfriend’s satisfactory yet significantly smaller cock, it felt like a fucking revelation. The way he split me open, and the way I could feel his manhood probing me – it was so, so much more animal… so much rawer. I could actually feel it throbbing through me, the pulse of his rod was that strong. 
 He gripped my hair in his hand, pushed my face up against the wall of the stall, and fucked me senseless. The stall rattled, though I was sure the other patrons of the club’s toilet were used to seeing (and hearing) strange things. I was too busy whimpering, gasping and moaning to be bothered with what people I couldn’t see thought of me, and too busy being jack-hammered to feel guilty about my actions anymore. In fact, I couldn’t help but compare the men’s respective prowess’ – having not had another man besides Charlie in almost a year, admittedly, left my sexual appetite wanting in certain areas. He liked things slow, and often struggled to take control in bed. I loved him, but I often left the bedroom wanting just a little more.
 And now, I was getting everything I missed out on. I was getting it all. No foreplay, no condom, no romance – just pure, unadulterated sex. As his cock jammed its way in and out of my cunt, he pulled my dress up to shoulders and massaged my bare tits in his hands. Pinching, rolling and smacking, he found the difficult balance between pain and pleasure, and sent me into one of the most intense orgasms I’d had in my life. As I came on a stranger’s cock in a poorly lit bathroom stall, I felt the man rest his forehead against the back of my head. He was breathing heavily, and his grunts grew louder, and more labored.
 He was going to cum.
 I was going to let some fucking stranger cum inside my pussy. I knew I was going to. I wanted it. I wanted to feel that first, violent shot of sperm bury itself deep into my cunt. I wanted him to fill me up with splashes of his warm, oozing cum. I wanted to feel it slowly spill out of me when he pulled the length of his shaft out of my pussy. And so I did. I let him cum inside me, knowing I was doing Charlie wrong.
 I remember very little of what happened after.
 ~
 Obviously, quite some regret followed when I woke up the next morning, sober, with a pounding headache, and the guilt of what I’d done weighing on my mind. My cunt was sore, and I swear there were traces of the stranger’s cum still oozing out of my pussy and onto the bed I shared with my boyfriend that night, in the new apartment we’d only just found for ourselves.
I couldn’t remember how I got home, but I was in a flimsy night-dress and looked reasonably kempt. I figured that my girlfriends had probably made sure I got home safely, though I didn’t think they would have told Charlie about what they likely knew had happened between me and the man they had seen me dancing with.
 I finally mustered up the courage sometime around noon to tell Charlie about the events of the night before. As much of an impulsive slut I was, I was no liar. If Charlie was going to dump me for it, I had braced myself for that too.
 “H-honey…” I heaved, breathless and struggling to look him in the eye, “I fucked up.”
I was taken completely off-guard by my boyfriend’s reaction to my confession. In fact, I… couldn’t believe my ears. The conversation we had that day would turn out to be the beginning of a loving, yet incredibly kinky chapter in both our lives.
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fightpunk · 5 years
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hey there! if your requests are still open, could i get some hol horse/n'doul or hol horse/steely dan? anything, sfw or nsfw, that pops out at you is perfectly fine! i can give you more details on how i imagine their dynamic if you'd need :D
A coming of age tale where Hol “Himbo” Horse realizes that everyone who works for Dio is a threat to his sexuality.
This is actually pretty sfw and pretty dialogue heavy! Hopefully I matched your dynamic between these two.
Out of all of those working under Lord Dio, Hol Horse had to be N’doul’s favorite. He’s not very loyal, and he’s so blatantly disrespectful to Lord Dio that it irritates him, but he is the most entertaining stand user N’Doul has met in the mansion so far. Cowardice, arrogance and a nasty habit for telling tall tales all wrapped up into a man who somehow manages to remain charming in an idiotic way. But, just because he’s amusing, does not mean N’Doul wants to be around him. He likes to keep his distance, like admiring an animal in its habitat.
So when N’Doul is told he’ll be working with Hol Horse, he’s not exactly excited about it. He’d much rather work alone, or with someone more on his level, not some boastful clown, but he it could be worse. At least he won’t be bored.
But he apparently will be annoyed because the trip there is annoying conversation after another and the moment the pair step into the hotel room, Hol Horse quickly begins chatting up N’Doul about going out on the town and getting drinks.
“Lord Dio is expecting us to find the Joestars.” He reminds his current partner. They have a duty and need to be prepared for anything.
Hol Horse shakes his head as he chuckles. “Mister Dio doesn’t have to know. We’ll get it done.” N’Doul can smell the Tobacco of Hol Horse’s cigarette long before he takes it out of its pack. His lighter flicks on, lighting the end of the cigarette only for a menacing, clawed hand to swipe the item from between Hol Horse’s lips, making the man squeak in surprise and back away.
“Yes, we will get it done. As soon as possible.”
Hol Horse eyes Geb wearily, watching the stand return to its owner before he reaches to pull another cigarette from its pack. He casts a glance at the other to make sure he won’t get another little surprise before flicking his lighteron once again.
“Y’know, you’re a real stick in the mud.” Hol Horse strides over to one of the hotel beds, plopping down on it and getting comfortable before lighting his new cigarette.
“It’d be quick. Hell, we might even run into those Joestar fellas while we’re out.” He takes a drag. N’Doul silently takes note of where his voice has moved in the room.
“Maybe we’d find you a girl too. Women love a pretty face like yours.”
Hol Horse’s priorities really are out of order. Drinks and girls? Apparently, this was a vacation and not a mission. Why Lord Dio still lets him live is beyond him.
“Really, Hol Horse? Pretty?” N’Doul wrinkles his nose at the overwhelming scent of smoke as well as the silly little comment.
“Well, it’s just a compliment.”
N’Doul feels an opening. An opening to toy around with the cowboy. His tone of voice sounded a bit off. Like he was being accused of something.
“That’s strange coming from you, when you so desperately try to avoid any semblance offinding another man attractive.”
“Now wait a minute, don’t turn this into something else! I was just saying!”
N’Doul is smirking now. He’d be lying if he didn’t say it was amusing how quickly the mangot to squirming. He’s heard Lord Dio tease him like this before, even Mariah. Hol Horse is just too easy to harass.
“Turn this into something else? What do you mean, cowboy?”
He hears Hol Horse struggling to form a sentence, fumbling over his words.
“Look, I was just saying you got a good face is all.”
“So you think I’m handsome then?”
It’s silent. Hol Horse sucks his teeth. He’s so dang frustrated right now. Why’s everyone gotta pick on him? A man gets nervous when getting hit on by a vampire and now he’s the butt of every joke? N’Doul is handsome, but now he doesn’t want to just say it and have the man keep making fun of him. He can’t even give a guy a compliment. And he’s just so quick to retort.
“Oh? you’re so quiet. Are you thinking about it? Should I have said pretty instead?”
Well, looks like N’Doul isn’t gonna let him avoid the question.
“All I was saying was that you could get any woman you want. That’s all.”
“Could I get you?” It’s quick, a viper striking the moment Hol Horse stops talking.
He pauses before shooting a frown at N’Doul, not that he can see it though. His partner looks so smug, a smirk tugging at the corner of his full lips, his eyelids sitting low over his milky white eyes, lashes all thick and long. Why’s he feel all nervous and hot all of a sudden? Hol Horse takes a long drag of his cigarette before putting it out in the complimentary ashtray.
N’Doul tilts his head to listen better. He can hear Hol Horse moving around on his bed, but he’s gotten very quiet. He can hear the dry clicks of his throat when he swallows. How nervous he’s become. It’s very telling of how Hol Horse truly feels. He should work on that.
Finally, he gives up, huffing out his answer.
“I don’t know, N’Doul, geez. Whaddya want from me? A Kiss?” He mutters most of hissentence, but N’Doul’s ears are sharp. He catches all of it.
“Since you’re offering, I wouldn’t mind one.”
Hol Horse chokes on his spit. Coughing harshly as the spurs on his boots jangle from all his movements. N’Doul chuckles lowly. He can’t help it. The cowboy has some amazing reactions sometimes.
“You… you serious?” He sounds so shy when he asks, which only makes N’Doul’s smile grow.
“Of course, cowboy. I’m comfortable enough.” It’s a dare. ‘I’m comfortable with my sexuality, unlike you’. It’s implied and Hol Horse knows it. A low blow to see how far He wants to go to prove himself as being open-minded and comfortable. Gotta dig at his manhood to get some more reactions.
Hol Horse grows quiet, seemingly weighing his options before his bed creaks when he gets offit. He’s careful and slow with approaching the other man, watching him closely as he eases into his personal space. He wouldn’t want Geb to pay another visit.
He smells like Tobacco smoke and N’Doul can feel how close he’s standing in front of him. He can hear him sucking in shaky breaths.
Hol Horse is fucking sweaty. His face is probably strawberry red. It’s a good thing N’Doul can’t see how terrible he probably looks, but it still feels like he can when the man has his head tilted in his direction, smiling smugly up to him.
N’Doul waits patiently. He’s never met anyone so confidently unconfident in his life. It’s a strange mixture. He’ll probably chicken out.
He hears clothes rustle and something softly land on the other bed. Hol Horse’s hat based off the sound.  N’Doul waits until warm lips press to his cheek and stubble scrapes along his skin. He can feel the other’s breath brush along his face.
It’s quick and sweet. N’Doul almost wants to swoon at how cute it is. Like a schoolboy carefully kissing his crush.
“What a gentleman.” He chuckles and the other huffs as he pulls away. “Are you always so polite?”
He flinches when his lips are met with Hol Horse’s.
Oh
Oh!
That was unexpected! He didn’t expect him to go through with an actual kiss after that sweet little peck on the cheek. He can’t stop the smile that forms and he can feel the tension in Hol Horse’s face as he furrows his brows in response. His lips are surprisingly soft if only a little dry and he seems intent on only massaging his lips against N’Doul’s. It’s not surprising. N’Doul would expect Hol Horse to scream if their tongues touched, which is funny, but he doesn’t want to have his ears to ringing from something so stupid. It is tempting though.
Hol Horse’s eyes are squeezed tight. Damn him and his pride. One stab at his character and now he’s kissing another man. At least he has nice lips and he smells good and isn’t as scary as a certain vampiric boss he knows of. He feelsthe other man sigh through his nose and can still feel him smiling. Honestly, he wants to just shut him up, maybe bite his lip as a little revenge, but Geb is a dangerous stand.
He pulls away from N’Doul, standing straight and clearing his throat.
“There. You happy now?” He’s trying to keep his cool, crossing his arms and tilting his head. His eyes bulge out his skull when N’Doul licks over his lips before humming. It’s a simple movement that shouldn’t be as attractive as it is.
“Are you?”
“I uh-“
Hol Horse’s breath catches in his throat. He’s already cracked open a door tonight, he doesn’t want to sit down and mull the question over inhis mind and blow the door wide open. He steps away and snatches his hat from the bed, quickly placing it on his head.
“You know, you’re really right.”
“Oh? Right about what?”
N’Doul perks and listens to Hol Horse’s footsteps as he makes a rush for the door all while blabbering before pausing in front of it.
“Mister Dio really is expecting us to do good work. I think I uh,”
He glances over to his partner, perched on theother bed in the hotel room, sitting criss-cross with a soft, knowing smile gracing his face. He doesn’t interrupt Hol Horse. Of course not, let the man dig himself into his own hole.
“I think I’ll get a head start on finding the Joestars. We’ll find them faster if we split up.”
N’Doul makes a face, brows raising slightly insuspicion. He knows Hol Horse is lying, looking for any excuse to leave the room as quickly as possible. Mercifully he doesn’t call him out on it, or maybe he doesn’t have time because Hol Horse quickly says what time he’ll back at thehotel before speeding out the door.
N’Doul considers sending Geb after him as hestands and gathers his cane in his hands. Well, at least this gives him time to work alone and not be pestered. He’ll find the Joestar group either way.
He makes his way out of the hotel room, lockingthe door behind himself. He’ll avoid any bars, just to give Hol Horse somespace.
Apparently he has a lot to think about tonight.
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bubblyani · 5 years
Text
His Type : Part 2 (Ronnie x Reader)
Ronnie Kray’s now Two Shot “His Type”
Genre: Smut
Warnings: Swearing, Dom! Ron Kray, Sexual Themes (18+)
Author’s Note: Still remember when @meer0rauschen asked that lovely question, and the lovely people who seconded and thirded that (you know who you are😘) I’ve opened my mind to the possibility of a part 2 for this story. And my goodness, I felt hot writing this. The sinning continues once again. Hope you all enjoy!
Check Part 1 HERE
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“What’s wrong with you Y/N?”
You looked up from your lunch. Teddy and Leslie eyed you suspiciously as you were all finally having lunch at the bar. 
“What do you mean?” You asked innocently. With his elbow on the table, Teddy pointed at you. 
“You’ve be awfully quiet since the car ride to lunch...” he said with certainty, “What happened?” You gulped, unable to answer. 
“Did Ronnie say anything mean to you?” 
“No!” You replied a bit faster than you should, as you looked down and resumed eating your food. Keeping a secret was not easy, especially when it was something as unexpected as the one you shared with Ronnie Kray a little while ago. Plus you had a hard time acting normal, for example, when Ronnie’s gaze did not leave you for one second since then and how hot your face kept feeling. 
To make things worse, during work, all you ever felt was impatience, distraction and frustration. Your leg wouldn’t stop shaking, and you kept looking at the clock too many times, waiting for the time to pass. It had been a long time since you felt all these emotions spread evenly in every inch of your body. 
 When the clock finally struck and you were finally free from the confines of work, life felt like it was full of endless possibilities for you. You walked home, expecting for a familiar car honk, or the sound of a slow engine behind you. But all you heard were either silence or all of that, for someone else. 
Suddenly, you couldn’t help but wonder whether Ronnie really meant what he said. Did he get preoccupied with The Firm and forget? Or was he just having a laugh about this whole thing?
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Slowly getting into the bathtub, a part of you already had already given up on the idea and wanted to forget about it, instead of feeling like a fool. Yet the more positive side of you decided to feel grateful, and proud of the exciting encounter itself, and slightly confident that Mr. Kray might actually show up at your door. 
The water splashed whenever you’d move around to clean yourself. The sight of your naked form, glistening with the soap filled warm water made you study yourself with a new fascination, imagining what it would be like, to be touched, held and ravished by him. As you continued, the daring side urged you to clean yourself even further down, with lighter strokes, as if he was there,  touching you already. But you were not an idiot, for you did not want to disrespect the man. And if he never shows up, the former could always be an option. 
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You wrapped the silk robe tightly around your body, the moment you managed to dry yourself with a towel. Butterflies did not seem to escape your stomach as you sat there in the living room, and you finally heard a knock on the door. 
Making sure you were not hallucinating, you tiptoed to the door, to look through the door hole. Butterflies somehow managed to multiply themselves within, followed by your breath quickening. You opened the door, keeping yourself composed. 
 Ronnie Kray stood outside the apartment hallway. No words were exchanged, the two parties were fully aware of the activities that will surely come to past tonight. 
 You moved to the side, allowing him to enter. His eyes never went past your body, especially when your erect nipples were quite visible through the thin robe. 
 “May I take your coat?” , You decided to speak first, trying to reach for it. Suddenly he grabbed your hand tightly.Pulling the hand to his face, he silently sniffed your fingers to your surprise. 
“Did you touch yourself before I got here?” He asked, in a dark tone. Biting your lip, responded: 
“Does washing yourself in a bath count?” 
With a grunt and much force, he pulled you to him, attacking your lips with the same energy, savoring what he had missed since the lunch break. Kissing him back, you were happily surprised. 
“That ..” you began, “was a nice way to start the night” you said breathlessly the moment your lips left his. But his grip on your hand did not. He owned you, and you did not mind that. 
Gently pulling him forward, you guided him to the living room. 
“Please ...” you said in a soft tone, as you unbuttoned his coat,” take a seat” eyes were in silent conversation as you helped him take it off before he made himself comfortable. 
You stood so close to him, your legs managed to brush against his knees. The way he observed you, you felt like a animal being watched by it's predator. Leaning forward, Ronnie casually got a hold of the edge of your robe, feeling the material with his fingers. 
"Silk is such a nice material" he commented, "Such a shame this has to come off" he continued, his dark gaze moving over to your face, setting you on fire. 
You knew better than to defy Ronnie Kray, you knew enough. Resting your hand on the knot, you slowly undid it. Opening the robe in equal speed, you got rid of yourself of it, throwing the light material back, as you finally stood  in front of him, naked. "It is a shame" you replied, watching his eyes scan your foreign nude frame.,"Maybe I should” You said, as you slowly turned behind”... get it back-" 
"On your knees" he commanded. 
Obedient as you were, you lowered down, crawling on all fours towards the piled robe, while he watched you from behind. Pushing your buttocks up, you lowered your upper torso down to the ground, lithe as a snake. You hummed in pleasure, pushing your rear up higher, feeling the softness of the silk on your cheek, fully aware of the fact you're giving Ronnie a clear view of your throbbing slit. He watched calmly, although his shaft was not as calm as he was. 
"Enough! Crawl back...now" 
Returning to him, you noticed the growth in his trousers. You took your sweet time, running your hands up and down his thighs, till you finally decided to halt at his belt. Keeping your eyes on him, you bravely unbuckled his belt. As you unzipped, you took his manhood out, whilst licking your lips with a great appetite. Touching with the upmost delicate nature, your mouth watered instantly. But that thirst could not be satisfied when he quickly grabbed you by the hair, tilting your head over to him. 
"Who told you, you could do that?" he asked sternly. You opened your mouth. 
"N-no one" you answered, trying to hid your nervousness. He pulled you closer, his shaft accidentally brushing against your breasts, causing a whimper to escape your lips. 
"Sit" he said, suppressing the need to express his arousal. He leaned back when you climbed up on him, facing him straight as you sat on his lap. 
"Undress me" 
You understood the game he was playing, and you could not help but enjoy it. He was not like other men...no bullshit was involved. 
You found it hard to concentrate when you took his glasses off, for his growth kept brushing on your buttocks. You gasped. As you put the spectacles away, wetness appeared in generous amounts instead.
Slowly, you unbuttoned his waist coat. Without removing it, you quickly moved your hands to the tie. 
"No..." he stopped you, "do it properly". There it was, more fire. 
Moving forward, he watched your body contort, stretch when you took off his waist coat, causing both of you to be centimeters apart. You swallowed, staring at his inviting lips as you held his waist coat on your hands. Soft moans came out your parted mouth, when you were desperate enough to rub it against your chest, feeling the material on your skin. As you heard his fist clench in frustration, you swore you almost saw Ronnie start to curse under his breath, but stopped himself. 
Dropping the waist coat down with one hand, you took hold of his tie with the other, moving even closer that you felt his breath on your collarbone. You tried so hard to focus undoing his tie when his hardened member sprung up higher, resting in between your butt cheeks. Ignoring it all your might, you fought back by holding his tie between your teeth, when you moved over to his shirt. 
"F-fuck" finally you heard his curses escape softly. Feeling his walls coming down, you threw the tie away, taking his right hand, placing it on your left breast. You resumed unbuttoning while feeling his hand explore you. You loved his hands on you. So you were not ashamed to do so. His palm brushing on your hardened bud along with the feel on his rings on your sensitive skin, sent frantic signals of pleasure, causing the throbbing below to increase. 
After unbuttoning the last one, you pulled the shirt down. His other hand took hold of your other breast, both hands now partners, as they pinched and pulled, watching you gasp without wasting any time. 
Stomach muscles clenched up tight, you were burning up, and you felt impatient. You pulled his wife beater up much faster than you did with the other clothes, and he did not seem to complain. Probably the fact his concentration was somewhere else. You made a sound in frustration when his arms got in the way of you taking the last piece of clothing off his torso. You were stopped when he grabbed your hand. Taking a deep breath, you wondered what exactly did he want you to do this time. When he pulled you forward, you knew why, as he kissed you with an intense hunger. 
It felt competitive, it felt intense. He did not want to take it slow, for you quickly felt his tongue demanding you to present your own. Quite the reminder from this morning. 
Arms snaking around your waist, he got up, with you wrapped around him. Your fingers frantically running through his hair, revealing the look you witnessed for a short period before in the car. Kneeling down, his mouth did not leave you when he placed you on the rug. Leaving to yourself, he stood up, stripping the rest of his clothing as quick as he could. 
The sight alone felt like a penetration, when he watched you, panting and naked. With your legs pressed together, you lay there watching him. You slowly parted them open as your fingers slowly ran down your stomach, then even further. 
"No fucking thing goes in there before I do!" he ordered, kneeling down on top of you when he parted your legs fully open with force, inserted himself in you in a flash. You cried out in surprise, but no surprised when you felt him enter you with convenience as your insides literally flooded with arousal. 
He continued to ram into you while he pinned your hands above your head, each push was strong enough for you to move along with him. 
"Ron-!" you moaned. Those moans were later promoted to cries of a loud variety in time as he dipped his head on your neck. Biting into your neck, he left hickeys wherever he could as he moved down to leave more on your chest. 
"Oh...fuck yes" you cried out, pleasure arising through the pain as he marked you. 
Grunting with each push, he made himself home inside you with enough thrusting, that he finally felt his release through gritted teeth. Throwing your head back, you felt him pull out, raining himself all over your stomach.
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Puffs of smoke left his lips as Ronnie smoked his cigar. Sitting on the armchair, he had you wrapped around him, both still naked. You took the opportunity to play with his loose hair, appreciating this rare sight that you did not get to see that often. 
"I would never hurt you, you know" he said, making you pause. 
The fact that Ronnie Kray could have a small dose of tenderness in him warmed your heart. 
"Of course...." you replied, running a finger along his cheek "but it was nice to know I did something risky with you. It'll be a lovely thing to remember by" you said, the warmed heart feeling a bit heavy, knowing the fun had ended so quickly. His hand suddenly held on to your waist tightly. 
"Who said this was the only time?" 
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Check my MASTERLIST for more.
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jay-and-dean · 5 years
Text
Je ne te mérite pas (I don’t deserve you) Chapter 3.
DeanxReader
Serie MASTERLIST
Warnings : Smut, swearing, Fluff
Future warnings : Smut, Fluff, Angst, Violence. Many smutty times in the next parts, I don’t know how I will deal with it given the recent event on tumblr, I’ll let you know
Words : 4233
Chapter summary : He finally can’t resist her...
Serie Summary : Dean and her can’t be together.If you ask Dean, he would list so many reasons : Her age, first. Not like she was a kid anymore, but he remerbers picking her from highschool not so long ago. Then Jody, damn, the girl is like a daughter to her, what kind of friend would he be ? He’d talk about her boyfriend and how he’s the opposite of himself. Of course he would expose how poisonous he is, how dangerous it is to be around him. He’d say he want to keep her away from nightmares… And he would conclude with certainly that she just won’t ever love him, why would she ?
If you ask her, she just might whisper with a heartbreack in her voice : “I don’t deserve Dean Winchester”.What if they where wrong ?
Note : It is my first time writting in english, so, forgive the errors.
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Your Pov
This son of a bitch made it real. He made your fantasies real. You were in love with him but it was a whimsical fantasist though, like you didn't even deserve to think of him in any other way than pure admiration.
And he let you kiss him...
He took you by the wrist and looked at you with desire, made you touch his lips...
And now it's fucking real.
Sasha is over you, buried inside you, kissing your neck and caressing your thighs, and you are thinking about Dean Winchester. What would it be like to have him kissing you neck like Sasha does ? What kind of lover can he be ? He's a man, a almost forty years old warrior man, you probably couldn't handle him anyway. You can't stop thinking about all the ladies he had sex with, the luckiest girls in the world, but so oblivious... having Dean Winchester but not even knowing what it means.
Sasha kisses you and only then you realize it's over, he is soft again, lying beside you and kissing your mouth almost eagerly. You break the kiss and smile at him, you stroke his hair and lay a kiss on his forehead then you get up and head straight for shower.
The water is warm and the bathroom is misty, you use Sasha's masculine shower gel and still, your stomach hurts because Dean is not here. You're going to find an excuse to come home sooner today, you need to be in the bunker, Sasha's apartment makes you claustrophobic, it's been three days and you just want to see Sam, and have Dean around.
It's strange to think of it, why would Dean want you close ?Seeing you half naked doesn't usually turn men on, all those scars... You always keep your clothes on when you sleep with someone, expect with Sasha, he knows you by heart and he doesn't ask questions anymore.
Maybe it's just because you are the girl that's there, available. The bunker is filled with men, and you happen to have boobs, that's it.
 Dean's Pov
I put the keys on the table, they're still a little bloody, I sight and rub my neck, fucking vampire. Then see Sam's phone light up : "I'll be home around 8. I'm bringing food."
Y/n wasn't supposed to come home this early, she said she'd drive by night when she left. Is there a problem with Sasha ? Did they have a fight ?No one would come back soon when they can see their loved one only once or twice a month. But I won't know anyway.
My chest narrows at the thought of seeing her, that kiss made it worse and now I'm a mess. I spent the weekend asking myself what she was doing with him, if he wanted her like I do, how she acted with him, why she kissed me... I'm just craving to kiss her again, to touch her body and, in a primal way, to take her like I owned her.
I shake my head and chase away these ideas, joining Sam in the kitchen.
 When I hear the door, my heart races. There she is, smiling at me again, hands fool of bags, her eyes bright, her jeans tight.
We eat all together, Sam, Cas, Jack, Y/n and I, and all falls into place naturally, like it's how it's supposed to be. She is asking Sam about the case she missed and apologizing to Cas that he can't really appreciate what she brought. I try not to stare at her, but she's just next to me, she doesn't smell like she usually do, she smells like a man, Sasha's been all over her and I hate it, I just want her to smell like herself again. Did he thought she smell like us when she came back to him ? What the fuck are you thinking Dean, she's not yours, people don't belong to other people, and you're not some kind of animal that sniffs girls.
Cas is gone with Jack, and when Sam gets up, saying he's heading to his room, he asks Y/n if she's coming with him. Before she can answer, I offer her a drink.
She stayed, not only for that drink but for the others, and the next time and the night after. Each time I ask her to stay with me, to come with me to do something, she does. I try hard to have her talk about herself, but most of the time, she just manages to make me confide in her.
 _____________
"I swear this girl was crazy !" she says, stretching her legs toward me on the couch, one feet resting on my thigh.
Y/n and I spend our evenings together when we’re not hunting, it’s become a routine, my favorite. Sometimes, she still joins Sammy to fall asleep with him, and he told me she confessed hating falling asleep alone, because those nights she has nightmare. Last night, she fell asleep on the couch and I carried her to bed, still fighting the urge to touch her more than needed.
She relaxed over the evenings and nights we spent talking, her body relaxed to, and she now lies here, next to me, legs on mine, her head on the armrest.
"I can't believe she still has all of her teeth" I joke, taking a sip of my beer.
"I try not to fight, last time I did, the guy went to hospital", she laughs a littler and frown. "I guess I have too much anger, or a too violent story like Claire told me, anyway..."
"Wow, when was it ?" I ask.
"Mh, I don't know, 11th grade maybe... I broke his jaw and he, he had penis surgery..."
I look at her in shock, my eyes wide.
"What the ! Y/n, remind me to never make you angry !Wow ! What did he do ?"
Her smile fades away and she almost seems still mad. She stretches out a little bit on the couch, getting closer to me in the process. Under her long sleeve-shirt, I can see she not wearing a bra, and I try not to look there.
"He said something wrong about the wrong people." She says and she shyly smiles at me.
Our fun and lightweight discussion is turning serious and I lay my hand on her calf, craving for contact, looking at her.
"What did he say ?" I ask.
She hesitates and looks at my hand instead of my face.
"It was when Sam and you where often at Jody's and, you picked me out of school sometimes. Haha, I loved it, seeing the Impala waiting for me..."
I remember this, she was always alone when she get out of the building, and she always rushed toward the car, like it was a relief.
"Well, there was this guy, Troy" she continues. "He was hitting on me, kindly at fist, like... he said I was pretty and all that crap. But I pushed him away each time, and when he became insistent I told him something like "not even if you where the last blabla". Troy was not used to rejection, and so he spread a rumor, that I was a slut or whatever."
I clench my fist and mutter "Son of a bitch".
"But I didn't really care, I already was the creep of high school anyway... I was planning on a spell to give him crabs or whatever" she laughs and bite her lips mischievously.
Then she starts touching her hands, playing with the silver ring she always wear and she opens and closes her mouth a few times. Then finally she starts to speak.
"But one day, you had picked me up the day before, and seeing your car wasn't here he said something like "Alone ? Maybe ex-convict-weirdo-uncle choose to screw your mother and not your slut ass today". And so I broke his jaw, and hurt his manhood pretty bad. I had to do community services after that..."
I can’t move, my own anger making my blood boil. I try to speak and the only thing that comes out of my mouth is :
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be” she says. And then she punches my arm. “Dean ? I shouldn’t have told you that…”
I ask her why and she just says she doesn’t know. Then she suddenly sits so her body is very close to mine, her leg still in my lap, the other under her. She looks at me closely and I want to take her in my arms and touch her everywhere. Fuck, this Troy was right about one thing.
“Maybe I am indeed like an ex-convict weirdo uncle” I say low.
She sights deeply and put her head on my shoulder. We’ve never been this close, it’s like we’re cuddling and I want her so bad it makes me feel guilty.
“There it is…” she says with sadness in her voice.
“What ?”
“Self-denigration.” She whispers. “You’re not a weirdo, Dean, you’re a hero.”
Silence falls on us, her hand on my lap next to her thigh, her head resting on my shoulder, mouth toward my neck. I want to push her away but it’s far beyond my strength ; instead of that, my hand comes on her waist by itself. She smells so good, she is so close, I could drift any second and it scares me to death.She sights and lifts her hand from my knee to my chest, resting it there, certainly feeling my heart beat like crazy.
“I could easily sleep here” she murmurs “You’re comfy”.
I’m burning, her sweatpants seem so thin, her hair so soft. My other hand comes to rest on her knee, but something clicks inside my brain, like it has gone off. My fingers starts to gently caress her knee and she lets a really quiet moan out.
Fuck everything.
I stroke her thigh and go up, reaching her ass like I always dreamt of. She starts to shiver and I restrain myself from getting further. I’m high, not even knowing what I’m doing, but trying hard to stay on Earth.
Then I feel it, her mouth open kissing my throat, her hand on my chest pressing harder, her breath is so hot and her lips are wet. And I lost it. My hand slips under the edge of her shirt and I close my eyes. Her leg readjusts so she’s straddling me a little more, but not entirely and she buries her face on my neck, I’m trying to hide my panting. I just need to make her moan, make her shiver, make her mine… So my hand comes on her thigh again and travels on her front, timidly caressing her pussy through her pants. She moans and licks my throat. My heart is going to explode, my underwear too.
“Y/n…” I exhale.
“Dean…”
My name. She said my name in an exhale of pleasure, I’m about to burst in flames.
And suddenly it all comes back.
Jody.
Sasha.
Her age.
The life. My life.
Danger.
Everything.
“Y/n, y/n… I’m sorry I can’t. This is wrong.” I say hating myself.
She lets go easily, like she agreed, she gets up and smiles at me, her face flushed. She looks at me, I wish I could get up, hide my arousal and be a man about it. But I’m like a child that’s been abandoned.
“It’s okay Dean. Just… Friends ?” she asks.
“Friends”.
 Your Pov
You can’t sleep. Your body is too shaken, your mind is going mad. You haven’t really slept in three days.
Three days.
Dean touched you there and you had a taste of his skin on your tongue. Everything is different. And it goes on and on in your head : flashes, ecstasy, excitement, fear, sadness, emptiness, hope, fear, flashes, butterflies, sadness…
Did you tease him ? Was it your fault ? Maybe he didn’t even want it to start. You talk to him about being calling a slut and then you act like one… But he touched you, he started it didn’t he ?Maybe he wanted you after all, he doesn’t have to know you love him. If he just wants sex, you are willing to give him anything he wants, even if that breaks your already shattered heart into smaller pieces.
Sasha called you yesterday and you talked for an hour. He knew something worried you, so you told him a little piece of the truth : “I saw him. I’m just sad.” You said. He didn’t understand why you were sad about it, “Was he with a girl ?” he asked… And you just told him everything was complicated in your mind, he tried to convince you to visit him but it wasn’t the right time.
Sam looked concerned too, seeing you forget to eat, and losing your keys, resting in bed all morning. But when he questioned you, you just didn’t answer, shrugging.
Dean was all natural, casual, and when you noticed he acted as usual, even with you, a part of the weight on your stomach disappeared.
 ________________
Then a complicated hunt made you clear your mind. The stubborn Winchesters fell into a trap and you saved their life, preventing an Ancient God to bleed them to death, Sammy had lost a few but the guy is tough.
After the hunt the three of you went to a bar to celebrate and of course Sam was too tired to stay, he had to recover. So Dean and you stayed together, and it was the first evening you spent together in a long time, telling your drunk stories to each other and drinking a lot.
 The morning after you wake up with a bad hangover, on Dean’s bed, him lying beside you. You look at him and think, with butterflies in your stomach, that this man you love is becoming a very close friend, and the hope of being that to him is more than you ever dreamt.
“Mh…” Dean groans, rubbing his eyes. “What time is it ?”
“Noon.”
“What ? Oh !” he stretches and sits, holding his head in his hand. “That last bottle was definitely too much… Nightmares ?” he asks turning to you.
“No… I slept like a baby. A passed out baby.”
As he says nothing, grabbing a bottle of water and realizing it’s empty, you continue.
“That’s why I often sleep with Sammy you know. It seems that sleeping beside a Winchester prevent me from nightmares. So thank you for protecting me from the monsters inside my head. ”
“Anytime.”
He smiles and kisses your forehead before getting up.
_________________ 
In ten days, you have slept one time with Sam after watching movies, seven times on crappy motel rooms, one night with Sasha, one night on one of the chair of the Forteress of Deanitude, and ten times with Dean, on a couch, on his bed or in yours.
Sometimes you just fall asleep drinking or talking or watching a movie, sometimes after a nightmare you join him and coil like a cat beside him over his blanket, sometimes, he carries you to bed and stays with you. And sometimes, he hears you scream in you sleep and joins you, slips under your cover and puts a shy hand on your shoulder telling you he’s here.
This is one of those nights.
Dean came to your bed and told you you were safe, he did exactly like he always does, except he was a little closer. It is the best thing in the world, having Dean beside you all night, but you are craving for him.
Why not ? You cuddle with Sam, you could get a little comfy with Dean. And having his arms around you like it happens some mornings is the closest thing to heaven. So you let yourself get even a bit closer to him, and he immediately respond, taking you in his strong arms from behind.
Having him so close is the best filling in the world, you feel like in one of those rare dreams, the ones which are better than reality, that feel like heaven. His smell makes you dizzy and you are aware of every inch of your body that's in contact with his. His foot brushes your heel and his knee is nestled against your leg, his waist doesn't touch you but you can feel his belly when he breathes deeply, his massive arm rests on your stomach and you know he feels how trembling you are. His head is just next to yours, face toward your hair ; how can not kissing someone be painful ?
You know he can feel it, this electricity, your body shaking and his burning, sweat breaking through his delicious skin. Maybe it is the reason why Dean have had so many conquests, his body made for love, reacting like a volcano when he touches a woman's body, making hers melt. Or maybe it is your love for him that’s consuming you.
He feels it, because his finger gently brushes the skin that your t-shirt doesn't cover, and your breathing begins to tremble intensely. And when you turn your upper body slightly to face him more, his starts to shake too. It's dark, but you can see his eyes staring at yours, and his mouth slightly open, so close. His finger is joined by another on your burning skin and finally all his hand rests on your stomach.
He closes his eyes for a second and his hand comes up, very slowly, until he is touching your breast. You stop breathing, your heart beating his hand like it was try to join it out there. His head gets close to yours and his lips brush your neck, his body is getting close and you can now feel his chest rising with force against your shoulder and arm. The big strong hand that was on your breast starts to explore to other one and find a way under your shirt.
"Stop me..." he whispers like he was out of breath.
"Y/n, tell me to stop".
His voice desperate against your throat is the hottest thing you ever heard and felt, so you let out a quiet moan and reach out to touch him, your hand falling on his waist. He groans and sticks his entire body against yours. That's when you feel how hard he is, and that sends an electric shock to your panties. You think you’re going to faint… or die.
He starts kissing your throat and biting it gently, and his mouth finds its way to your jaw, he turns you over so you’re fully on your back and he puts his body a bit more above yours. You’re a mess, panting and shaking and you think you could come like that, Dean Winchester devouring your skin.
You turn your head, desperately avid for his mouth, crushing your lips to his, and he kisses you.
He kisses you like he was feasting on your throat a minute ago : fiercely and deliciously. His tongue caressing yours is the permission you needed, and you wrap one arm around his neck, like you’ve always dreamed of, and let the other linger on his back, feeling his muscles tighten and relax under your fingers. He’s so manly yet tender, and you have a single thought for Sasha : This, this is not the same, Dean is not the same.
When he’s completely above you, gently rubbing his boxers against your thigh, you realize what’s going on, and you start to panic.
There is no fucking way you are making Dean Winchester feel those things. You know now you are going to have him inside you… fuck this was not supposed to happen, it’s like you’re blessed. It’s so overwhelming you could cry, he is everything, always have been and he gives himself to you, how are you supposed to survive when it’s over ?
He must be feeling your anxiety because he breaks the kiss.
“I can stop.” He says panting. “I should.”
“No…” you whine and you try to pull his underwear down.
He groans low and starts devouring your neck again, his crotch moving along with his tongue. Then things speed up : He’s touching you everywhere and kissing you, biting you, and in an instant your pajama pants are gone, along with you panties, you didn’t even realize he moved, you’re high on him. You’re pulling his boxers down when he stops moving, resting his forehead against yours.
“I shouldn’t… This is…” he starts to murmur, completely out of breath, but you kiss him and wrap your legs around him.
“Dean…” you didn’t recognize your own voice, it’s low, desperate and obscene, and in the same time it sounds like a prayer.
He sighs, mumbling Oh fuck to himself and one of his hand comes to your thigh. You finally feel him right where you didn’t even allow yourself to dream you would. His tip against you, his mouth on yours.
And he enters you, fills you completely, slowly but firmly.
Everything is blurry and perfectly clear. In the same second you can feel the intensifying smell of his sweat, your body stretching to welcome him, his stomach shaking, the air he’s breathing out in your mouth, every inch of him inside you, your heart screaming for him, his arms around you, elbows on each side of your head, how big and strong he is, how tall, the heaviness of his charisma you’ve always loved so much, his powerful lower back holding himself back... Everything. But you can’t clearly tell where you end and where he starts for a second.
You didn’t realize your eyes were closed, until you open them and drown in his. You kiss him like you always dreamed you would, without any reserve, finally giving in, letting the control blow up.
Kissing you back he starts to move, thrust, moan and you can’t concentrate on his lips anymore, letting your head fall onto the pillow, mouth agape, breathing his smell like it was the more powerful drug in the world. You try to focus, you want everything, not just the intense pleasure he’s giving you, you want to feel him and see him. So you open your eyes again and he’s still watching you, sweaty and serious, his face so beautiful it makes you shy again for a second, like he was between pain and ecstasy. You want to talk to him, tell him how beautiful he is and how good this is, how no man ever had that effect on you, how letting go was such a big deal for you, you would also tell him to let go, that he’s not hurting you, that this is okay, that you want all of him… But you can’t trust your mouth now, because between moans and panting, all it would let pass your lips would be I love you. And this is never going to be said. Ever.
He doesn’t say anything either. It's silent and you're in the dark, he's so tall and strong, you love him so much that he eclipse everything anyway. Just him over you, over the world.
You hang onto him, and let the pleasure devour you, you can't breathe properly because your body doesn't know how to react to so many sensations and feelings.
Then it hits you without warning. An orgasm so strong everything shuts down for a minute, you open your mouth wide, like you were screaming but no sound comes out. Dean kisses your lips and bites your throat, he groans with restraint and you feel his body shake ; you try to look at him, but everything is blurry, and he hides his beautiful face on your neck anyway.
You're suddenly cold, and burning at the same time, he is still buried deep inside you but he stops moving. Your pussy and your legs both keeping him there, he's out of breath and his body weights a little more on you.
Finally he withdraws and lets himself fall beside you, still lying on his stomach, a hand across your chest. He looks at you.
His beloved face, all sweaty, looking at you so closely. You wish you could die like that. And you look at him, letting a bit of your infinite love show, wishing the dark hides it for you.
"We didn't use a..."
"I'm on pill" you cut him on the same volume, barely a whisper.
He is silent. You thought he would have left already but he stays there watching you watching him.
"Y/n..."
"I know, Dean" you say calmly, it's not like you have thought he would want anything more. You're ready for it, you had more than you could dream of, now it's over. You just don't want him to make it awkward.
"It's just" he starts "I shouldn't ha..."
"Dean" you stroke is cheek gently and kiss his lips one last time. "It was great, but it's over. I have a boyfriend and we are friends."
He nods and sights.
 The night is going to be long, because there is no way you are going to sleep, you are going to make it last every damn second you can.
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bingbong21 · 6 years
Text
The Things We Fear
Summary: It's not just alien invaders that a person can be afraid of. It can also be the what-if's, the what could have beens, and everything in between.(Alternatively: Keith and James become friends with benefits in an effort to cope)
A/N: I 100% blame Keithy on the Sheithans server. This can be found on ao3 here and FFN here. 
It was supposed to be a one-time thing.
Everyone had been hurting after the failure of the Kerberos mission, but all their grief paled in comparison to Keith’s. James understood why of course; Officer Shirogane had gotten him into the Garrison, saved him from a life of jumping from one prison sentence to the next. But now that he was dead, that whole plan seemed to be in jeopardy. So like the kind, caring man that felt a sense of duty to finish what Shirogane had started and who wished the best for his fellow classmates (which had nothing to do with wanting to be top of the class fair and square), James set out to offer Keith his condolences and a shoulder to cry on. And of course like the paranoid, socially stunted bullheaded asshole he was, Keith took it as an invitation to fight.
It hadn’t been pretty. There was no elegance to their fight, just a raw brutal animalistic force that only two teenage boys on the cusp of manhood could wrought. It ended exactly like their first fight at the Garrison had, with James on his back and Keith above him with raised fists. Then Keith’s shouts turned to sobs, his punches into desperate grabs at clothing, and next thing he knew he was staring up at his ceiling naked with a passed out, equally as naked Keith next to him.
When he woke up the next morning, Keith was gone. Gone from his bed, from the Garrison, and probably from his life forever. James didn’t let the bruised pride or the smarting marks on his body interfere with his career, and soon he was top of the class with Keith as nothing more than a distance memory. He had effectively forgotten about the guy, focused on preparing for whatever would come his way.
Five years later and life decided to give him a roundhouse kick reminder that no one was allowed to forget the name Keith Kogane.
James leaned against the windowsill, staring out at the vast expanse of desert before him. He was in one of the corridors of the Garrison hospital, sitting on one of the cushioned ledges they provided. He was there because…because…honestly he had no fucking clue why he was there. Him and his squad had been cleared pretty quickly after the final battle, diagnosis nothing more than some bruises and scrapes with a prescription of rest and celebration with the rest of the universe. The Paladins of Voltron were either sleeping off four years of an intergalactic war or catching up with the people they left behind and the friends they made along the way. There was no reason for James to be here yet there he sat, looking out to the desert as if it provided answers.
The squeaking of the wheels of an IV drip pulled him from his musings. He looked over and had to fight the urge to rub his eyes. There, walking as if he hadn’t just woken up from an explosion-induced coma was the head of Voltron himself, Keith Kogane. He looked so much younger in the hospital uniform, the bandages wrapped around his head giving him a sense of vulnerability. Just like when they were younger Keith paid him no mind, sitting on the same ledge as him and staring out the window. Either he was still unaware of what an awkward silence was, or he also didn’t know how to approach the sudden tension.
“Didn’t you just wake up from a coma,” James asked; subtlety was never his strong suit when it came to Keith. “What the hell are you doing walking around?”
Keith glanced at him from the corner of his eye before looking back out the window. “Felt weird, sitting there doing nothing. Feel like I should be planning another battle strategy or be in some diplomatic meeting.”
Makes sense; even when they were young Keith felt the need to be occupied by something, otherwise he was prone to getting into trouble. “Don’t you have some aliens to catch up with though?”
Keith shrugged, “Mom and Kolivan are out doing stuff for the Blades, Shiro’s busy being the voice of a new world order, and the wolf is probably either getting spoiled rotten by Lance’s family or playing with Bae-Bae. Don’t exactly have many options left to keep me company.”
“I could keep you company.” The words are out of James’s mouth before he even thinks to process them. Keith fully turns to look at him, an eyebrow raised in question; James holds his hands up defensively. “What? I’m not a complete and utter asshole you know!”
“We fought literally every time we were in the same room as each other.”
“Not every time,” James shoots back; something about Keith makes him want to argue, even if it makes him look like a dumbass. Those thick caterpillars Keith calls eyebrows furrow together before shooting into his hairline. James feels a smug sense of satisfaction at the light blush that blooms across Keith’s cheeks. He takes it as an invitation to scoot closer to Keith, hand resting dangerously close to his.
“Everybody else is celebrating or rebuilding right now,” he murmurs, “a party of one sounds pretty lonely, don’t you think?”
“Since when have you cared about me being lonely,” Keith responds; it’s quieter, not at all reminiscent of the confident leader he saw in battle. James shrugged, fingers walking between the spaces left by Keith’s.
“Since we saved Earth from a bunch of murderous space furries,” he quips, cocky grin on his face. He settles his hand right on top of Keith’s; for such a fiery guy, he really did have cold hands. “So what do you say?”
Keith’s eyes drop to their hands before slowly making their way back to James’s face. He gives a short nod, jerking his head back towards where he came. Soon the two of them are walking back to Keith’s room, with James thinking back to that night before Keith left. All thoughts cease when the door opens and he’s pulled inside, a mouth slanted over his and the door closing behind them.
When James had left his room after pulling the thin hospital sheets up to Keith’s chin, that should have been the end of it. Just a celebratory knocking of boots together for having not died and saving the universe from tyranny.
Except it kept happening.
Whenever one of those things fell from the sky, James would find himself being shoved into a broom closet or bathroom stall. When they actually managed to catch a break for longer than two days James was either being dragged to Keith’s room or pushed back onto his mattress. Not to say that James was some pushover whore for Keith to use at his fancy; James instigated a bunch of their liaisons himself of course. It’s just…Keith’s need to fuck was a lot higher than his. Like a lot higher. To the point that James wondered if it was a Galra thing to always be in a constant state of fighting or fucking. If so, no wonder those fuckers took over the entire universe.
Apparently others took notice of Keith’s stamina.
“So are you and Kogane just fucking or what?”
James spluttered, water going all over the table. Kinkade, Leifsdottir, and Rizavi all moved their trays accordingly in scarily perfect synch. James glared at Rizavi while coughing, who had the gall to just sit there and innocently poke at her salad. He took the napkin offered by Kinkade, wiping at his mouth.
“What are you talking about?”
“After every mission you and Kogane disappear for approximately ten to fifteen minutes,” Leifsdottir stated as if it were just another piece of data, “afterwards you both appear slightly disheveled with marks that are generally associated with sex. You and Kogane also have a tendency to disappear together for large swaths of time whenever there is nothing else to do, only to come out looking the same.”
“So cut the crap and give us the deets.” Rizavi jabbed her forkful of salad at James’s face. “Y’all fucking or what?”
James heaves a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. “If you must know, yes, we are fucking. It’s a friends with benefits sort of deal; he scratches my back, I scratch his. Nothing more, nothing less.”
Rizavi hums, leaning forward on the table, chin resting in her hands. “And how’s that going for your big fat crush on him?”
James jerked away from the table, face erupting in flames. “I…How…I do not have a big fat crush on him!”
“Seventy-five to eighty percent of your complaints about him in flight school were about things that, upon further analysis, could be considered you actually talking about how attractive he is,” again Leifsdottir chimes in, as if she were just talking about the weather instead of one of her friends’ sex life. James shot her a glare, the blush still visible high on his cheeks.
“Yeah well, the numbers mean nothing. I don’t have a crush on Kogane, and this arrangement here isn’t making me have feelings.” He grabbed his tray, pushing away from the table. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I’m gonna finish lunch in the hangar.”
He ignored whatever snarky comment came from Rizavi’s mouth as he left the mess hall, thoughts bouncing wildly around his head. There was no way in hell he had a crush on Keith Kogane. Sure he respected the guy for his battle tactics, courage, and flight skills, but so did Commander Iverson and everyone else in the base. Did that mean they all had crushes on Keith? Of course not; it meant they were people with eyes and enough brain cells to rub together to have a decent thought. And fine, maybe he thought he was pretty easy on the eyes, but again that meant nothing. He’d seen Rizavi cycle through so many freak-outs about pretty girls without meaning to seriously pursue them that it barely even phased him.
Everything relaxed as he entered the upper decks of the MFE hangar. Something about being there, close to his ship and the opportunity of freedom just instantly calmed him. He looked around, hoping that he could claim a seat to look over his personal plane, when his eyes caught another Garrison cadet uniform perched on the walkway. More specifically, Keith in a Garrison cadet uniform with that kickass wolf perched on the walkway. Perched on the walkway right above where his beloved MFE sat charging.
Motherfucker.
“Thinking of stealing my ship are you?”
The dull thud that rang out in the hangar as Keith’s skull made contact with the rails above it had James wincing in sympathy. He walked over with his tray, afraid Keith might lash out in some sort of retribution. Keith merely clutched his head, groaning in pain before cracking an eye open.
“Why the fuck do people always think I’m trying to steal their shit,” he grumbled, arms slowly falling back to his sides. One hand came to rest on Kosmo’s head; the wolf pushed his snout into his hand. James shrugged, taking a seat next to him.
“You did steal Captain Shirogane’s care before we got here.”
“That was one time!”
“There was also the time you stole someone’s pens cuz they pissed you off. Oh, and the ti-” James was cut off as Keith slapped a hand over his mouth. He looked over at him, trying to avoid all connotations of intense eyes and hand over mouth with sex.
“Keep it up and I actually will,” Keith threatens before removing his hand. He wipes it off on his pants before crossing his arms on the railing, resting his head on them. James took a moment to study his profile before turning back to his food. Kosmo comes towards him, eyes asking for food and pets; it takes everything in him not to give in.
“What’re you doing in here anyway? Shouldn’t you be hanging out with your crew or something?”
“They were getting a little too rowdy for my tastes,” Keith responds, still staring straight ahead. He places a hand on Kosmo’s back, letting it rest. “It’s great to hang out with them, but when you spend two years on the back of a space whale with just your mom and a wolf, it takes a while to get used to it again.”
“Space whale?”
The corner of Keith’s lips twitch upwards, as if remembering fond memories. “It’s a long story.”
He turns to look at him, eyeing his tray empty of everything save a few scraps of meat James left for Kosmo. “What about you? What brings you here instead of being with your squad?”
James set his tray aside, watching as Kosmo descends on it like a vulture. He makes it a point to mimic Keith’s previous posture, resting against the railings. He shrugs, staring down at his jet. “Same as you. Rizavi made one too many snarky jabs.”
Keith hums, “So you can dish it but not take it huh?”
James’s shoulders tense; he’s not about to let some punk ass fuck buddy diss him in his happy place. He whips around to face Keith, only for his retort to die on his lips. Keith is laughing, a smile on his lips and good God he should not look as cute as he does. The Keith he remembers and the Keith he’s been fucking don’t smile or laugh like that. They’ve always been stony faced little bitches, only giving barest hint of emotion in the throes of passion.
“Relax Griffin, I was just kidding.” Keith’s snickers died down, face relaxing into something of…concern? James couldn’t tell, he was still trying to wrap his head around him laughing. “Rizavi really must’ve pissed you off huh?”
James wrenches his eyes away from Keith; anything to not confront the sudden emotions. “Yeah…guess it hit a little too close to home.”
More like a nail getting smacked down by a hammer, but Keith didn’t need to know that. A warm hand placed solidly on his thigh has him jumping form his thoughts. He looks over at Keith, eyes wide and faint blush on his cheeks. Keith’s jaw worked, eyebrows furrowed together as if he were chewing on a questionable piece of meat. James was about to ask what was up before he finally spoke.
“You ever fuck in the back of an MFE before?” James shook his head, too stunned by the sudden turn of events to do much else. Keith grinned, devilish and shit stirring and oh James was so fucked.
“Neither have I. Let’s fix that.”
It was cramped, hot, and humid inside his MFE, and so many different rules were being broken right now but honestly? James could give approximately zero shits at the moment. Not when he was leaning back in the passenger seat, Keith kneeling between his legs and sucking his cock just the way he liked. James moans, fingers combing through Keith’s thick hair. How the fuck did he get so good at this? Was that a thing for the Paladins of Voltron, just going around sucking alien cock? Or maybe he was practicing on one of his other Paladins; maybe he was practicing on Shirogane.
James growls low in his throat, grip tightening in Keith’s hair. Those two were awfully chummy before Kerberos, and now that Shirogane looked like some sort of Greek god? No wonder Keith’s asshole was always so ready to go; he’d been taking Shirogane’s monster cock on the regular for years now.
He yelped as a sharp pain shot up his thigh. James glared down at Keith who was currently sucking and licking a dark mark into the meat of his thigh. “The hell you do that for?”
“You spaced out,” came Keith’s smooth reply. He crawled up James’s body, settling himself in the other man’s lap. “I’m not doing this cuz I like the smell of sweaty balls you know.”
James pointedly looked out the window of the fight yet, trying to ignore the way Keith idly played with the ends of his hair. He could hear the frown in Keith’s voice when he spoke again. “What the hell has got you so worked up today?”
“Nothing!” James yelped again as Keith leaned in and bit into his neck. “Would you stop that! It’s not my fucking kink!”
“Not what you were saying a couple days ago,” Keith mumbles against his skin. He grasps James’s chin, yanking him to look him directly in the eyes. “Now tell me.”
James sucks in a breath, trying to resist the hypnotic lure of those beautiful eyes. “You and Shirogane ever fuck?”
Keith stares at James for a minute before his face scrunches up. James had seen the face before, when that orange-haired alien dude had cooked something up for the Paladins to try using Earth ingredients. “What? No! Why the fuck would I ever fuck Shiro?”
“Are you blind? Shirogane is hot! Plus…” James averts his eyes. He’s not sure why this part embarrasses him, but it does. “You guys have always had that really close weird bond thing going on.”
“Oh my God…” Keith mumbles, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose. He sighs, “You ever see that really old show Scrubs? Takes place in a hospital with a bunch of interns or some shit?”
James nods; it was Rizavi and Kinkade’s favorite old timey television show. Keith continues, “You know that one pair of friends on the show? Scrawny white guy and black surgeon dude? TJ and Thurk?”
“JD and Turk.” The correction slips out before James can stop himself; Keith rolls his eyes.
“Whatever, JD and Turk. That’s the kind of relationship we have. Definitely, hundred percent gay, we love each other to the ends of the universe and would do whatever it takes to save each other. But we’re not in love with each other, alright? He’s coping with Adam being dead and all that happened to him, and I’m…”
Keith goes silent, finally averting his eyes from James’s face. His jaw and face do that thing from earlier again. James cocks his head to the side, puzzled. “You’re…?”
“…Dealing with everything else, I guess,” he finally responds quietly. His shoulders are slumped forward; again James is struck just by how vulnerable and small Keith can look when he’s not leading them in battle. The thought is gone when Keith resettles in his lap, lining their bare cocks up together in his hand. His eyes are a smoky haze of lust and want; James is starting to wonder if that’s just a cover.
“Come on, we gonna finish or what,” Keith asks, lazily thrusting against James. James shudders at the feeling, prick perking back up in interest.
“Dunno, the moment is kinda gone,” James manages to mumble. Keith merely smirks, the fire of being issued a challenge lighting up in his eyes.
“Then let’s bring it back.”
More time had passed; the giant robots attacking them had slowed down to a trickle thankfully. Now it was just making alliances and a bunch of other bureaucratic niceties. Which was a pleasant change from the usual “Save the Earth or probably die trying” shtick they’d been doing, except that it kept the Paladins busy. Meaning that it kept Keith busy. Busy, and not needing a good lay to keep his head on straight. Which unfortunately for James meant he had plenty of time to ponder what his life had become and try to find meaningless mundane tasks to fill the time.
(“Why are you so obsessed with Scrubs recently? Is this a Keith thing?”
“It is not a Keith thing.”
“Oh my God it’s a Keith thing.”)
Right now he was engaged in his current least favorite way to pass the time; staring up at the ceiling of his room unable to sleep after curfew had been called. After so many years of being on edge, having to be ready to fight at a moment’s notice, James had trouble relaxing when the days had been so…mundane. No secret rendezvous with Keith to tire him out, no life or death situations to deplete his mental energy, just nothing but peace.
He hated it.
James groaned, rolling onto the side facing his bedroom, eyes shut tight. No, hate was too strong of a word. He just…had adapted too quickly to wartime life and was now having trouble adapting back. He’d seen the others have the same struggles; they’d walk around aimlessly, looking for something to do but finding nothing. Funny how they were chosen for their skills at adapting to new situations but sucked complete ass at reverting back.
A warm moist puff of air hit James’s face; he scrunched his nose at the smell. Why the hell did his room suddenly smell like dog breath? He cracked an eye open only to come face to snout with Kosmo.
“Jesus.” He scrambled upright, heart racing. Why the absolute fuck was Kosmo in his room? Sure he’d gotten into the habit of giving the wolf a treat every time he saw him, but that didn’t seem special enough to have him break into his room in the middle of the night. Kosmo merely tilted his head, watching James with an otherworldly sense of intelligence. James sighed, reaching forward to ruffle his fur.
“I dunno what you want, but you should go ba-” A sudden pulling sensation deep in his gut, and soon James found himself sitting in a corner of the Garrison gym in his boxers and undershirt. He whipped his head back and forth, trying to grapple with the realization that he was here and not in his bed. He glared at Kosmo, who was quietly curled up in front of him looking innocent of any crimes.
“Hey, what was that for?!”
“James?”
His spine stiffened; he recognized that voice all too well. He turned towards the source of the voice, eyes the size of dinner plates. He watched as Keith walked over, hair pulled back in a low ponytail, sweat running down his face and soaking the sleeveless undershirt he wore. He noticed how his hands were taped, but more importantly he noticed how low his pants rode on his hips.
“The hell are you doing in here?”
Keith’s voice had him snapping to attention. He gestured wildly at Kosmo. “I…y-your stupid dog came into my room and brought me here!”
Keith narrowed his eyes at Kosmo; Kosmo gave an uninterested yawn. “I thought I told you not to wake people up?”
“Actually I was already awake,” James offered; even after being kidnapped by a wolf he felt the need to make sure Keith knew it followed the rules. Keith blinked, apparently taken aback by the statement, before looking to Kosmo again. Kosmo stood up to stretch before walking forward to Keith. He bumped his head against Keith’s hand, clearly looking for affection.
“I’m not petting you just because you know what a loophole is,” Keith chided; Kosmo’s ears lowered, a whine coming from him. “Don’t give me that look! You know exactly what I meant when I said that. Now take him back to his room.”
James swears up and down that Kosmo gets the same defiant look in his eyes that Keith gets before promptly turning away from him. With head and tail held high he walks over to James, plops himself in his lap, and immediately does not do what Keith asked of him. James and Keith both stare at Kosmo in confusion; Keith growls.
“No, that’s not-Stop petting him, you’re reinforcing bad behavior!”
James pulled his hand away from the soft fur, looking up sheepishly at Keith. He honestly hadn’t even realized he was doing it until Keith called him out. “Sorry…”
Keith groans, walking over to sit beside him. He slides down the wall, shirt riding up as he sits, legs spread out in front of him. This close James can smell the pungent scent of sweat and body odor, dizzy from its force. Keith leans his head back against the wall, eyes slipping closed. The gym fills with silence; James begins petting Kosmo again.
“Why are you in here anyway?” The question claws its way out of his throat no matter how much he tried to hold it back. “Curfew’s been in effect for a couple hours now.”
“Couldn’t go back to sleep,” is the blunt response Keith gives. James looks over at him, observing the way he tenses at the question. How his body seemed poised to strike at a moment’s notice. It was so eerily similar to how he was as a child that James finds himself giving into his old habits of prodding when he shouldn’t.
“Why?”
Keith’s jaw tenses, hands clenching and unclenching into fists. James can tell he’s at war with himself, fighting a battle to tell a lie or a truth. It’s odd, watching Keith actually think before he moves. James had only ever known him to act rashly without a thought for the consequences. It was what made him a thorn in everyone’s side, yet at the same time made him such an incredible pilot. As the silence and battle stretched on, James pressed further.
“Keith…”
“Because of the nightmares,” Keith finally shouts; James jumps, startling Kosmo. Keith runs his fingers through his hair, eyes trained on the ground as he continued to speak.
“Because when I close my eyes I see my team dying, I see Shiro dying, or that stupid fight in that God forsaken factory, or my mom dying just within reach or,” Keith heaves a breath, fingers gripping the material of his pants, “or an entire planet being blown up because the Galra have just gotten that powerful now.”
“These alliance meetings…I know they’re important, know that they can change history, but they just…they make it impossible to exhaust myself so I can just black-out in bed.”
Realization dawns on James; he grips Kosmo’s fur harder than necessary. “That’s why we’re sleeping together, isn’t it?”
Keith nods, head still bowed as if in shame. James frowns as he processes the information, smoothing the ruffle he made in Kosmo’s fur. He’s not sure why this surprises him; maybe it’s because Keith has never failed to give off an air of confident nonchalance. Maybe it’s because he never suspected Keith of all people to use sex as a coping mechanism. Maybe it’s because he never thought Keith would involve him in any of his recovery steps. Either way he’s here and a choice needs to be made.
James turns towards Keith, reaching out with the hand not buried in Kosmo’s fur. He tilts Keith’s head up before slanting his mouth against his. He feels the way Keith freezes beneath his touch, lips chapped and slightly parted. Knows the exact moment Keith melts, moving his mouth in an all too familiar dance, allowing him to slip his tongue in. Shudders at the intimate feel of them meeting in the middle, twining around each other in greeting, combined with a tingling sensation in his stomach. Surprised when a sudden force has him pushing Keith down into…a mattress?
James pulls back, panting as he takes in their surroundings. They were back in his room, Kosmo nowhere in sight. He must have teleported them back before going back to Keith’s room.  He looks back to Keith, taking in the sight of cheeks flushed with something other than physical exertion, black hair spread out in a halo around his face. He traces his thumb reverently over the scar he came back with before daring to speak.
“You take care of the universe,” he murmurs; he settles more on top of Keith, straddling his hips. “Now, let me take care of you.”
A barely perceptible nod from Keith has James leaning back down to reconnect their mouths. He slips a hand under Keith’s shirt as their tongues pick up where they had left off. His skin is still tacky with sweat from the workout he did; James feels a desperate need to run his tongue over those hardened muscles. He pushes Keith’s shirt up higher, breaking the kiss only to remove it. He quickly yanks his own off, tossing them both to some part of the room before focusing back on Keith.
In the wake of Keith’s admission, the scars that mar his body tell a new tale to James. They tell the story of a man who’d give everything and anything to save the universe from tyranny. They speak testaments to his utter selflessness, how he puts lives above his own and asks for nothing in return. Before James had simply thought they were attractive, marks of his prowess as a warrior and ability to survive. Now though, he thinks as he traces the scar on his cheek and shoulder with his eyes, now he just hopes that someone had been there to soothe the hurts he suffered.
He presses a gentle kiss to the scar before peppering kisses down his neck. It’s different from the other times, no harsh bites or crudely given hickies. Tonight isn’t about staking claims or taking frustrations out on each other’s bodies. Tonight it’s about simply being there, taking care of the wounds they can’t see. Again James is reminded of that night they shared so long ago; he realizes then that he hadn’t treated Keith like he should have, like he had wanted to. He presses a kiss to the scar on his right shoulder, so dangerously close to his pulse point.
“I’m sorry.” The apology is almost lost in the harsh panting Keith provides. James feels fingers carding through his hair, blunt nails gently scraping his scalp.
“…For what,” comes the hoarse reply. James looks up, eyes locking onto Keith’s. He shrugs, hand idly moving to stroke at his abdomen; Keith’s muscles contract.
“For not treating you right,” he finally managed, moving to kiss a more recent scar further down. He continues moving, pressing kisses along every trace of injury, old and new, speaking between the kisses. The hand in his hair tightens as he moves ever close to Keith’s cock.
“That night, after the pilot error…I should’ve been kinder to you. I shouldn’t have said all the things I said to you, before or during. I know it doesn’t fix anything, but you deserve to know.”
The silence in the room is palpable, thick enough to cut with a knife. James wonders if Keith will shove him off now and tell him never touch him again. He’s surprised when he hears a isgh, and the hand in his hair pets him instead.
“I…” The hand stutters, before resuming its pace, “I’m sorry too. I know I wasn’t the easiest to get along with, and…I shouldn’t have left you that night. At least, not like that.”
James dares to look up; Keith is looking off to the side, finding the corner of his bed absolutely fascinating. He sees that vulnerable side Keith so rarely shows, and knows that he should tread carefully here. Still, seventeen-year-old James wants answers, wants to know why he was abandoned when all he tried to do was be kind.
“So why did you,” he asks as softly as he can manage, moving back up his body. Keith shrugs, still not making eye contact.
“I dunno, I was…scared? I didn’t know what would happen after, and I already was going to leave, so I just…did.”
James cups his face again. “You scared now?”
“Absolutely terrified.” Keith’s Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, leaning into the touch. “But…I don’t want to stop.”
James huffs, reaching over to grab the lube and condoms he keeps on his night stand. “That makes two of us then,” He uncaps the lube; Keith begins to shimmy out of his pants and boxers at the sound, “So at least…we can be scared together.”
He pulls his own boxers down, exposing his hard cock nestled in brown curly pubic hair to the air. He rolls the condom down, wanting to be prepared as soon as Keith is slicked and stretched. He takes his time loosening Keith, using one finger at first before gradually moving to two, then three. He never paid much attention to the sounds Keith made before and he curses himself profusely. The moans, the high pitched mewls he makes when James manages to strike his prostate, the expressions he makes on his face as he basks in pleasure…it’s enough to have him grasping the base of his dick to keep from cumming too soon. The rest is a blur; he’s only back to full awareness when he’s pushing inside Keith.
The feeling of that familiar wet heat gripping him tightly, coupled with the flood of newly discovered feelings has James feeling like it’s his first time all over again. Perhaps in a way it is; perhaps this was life giving them a second chance at something incredible. He reaches up, fingers lacing with Keith’s as he sets a slow pace, moans mingling beautifully with the punched out cries from Keith. With every thrust inside him James feels the balance of their relationship shift, changing from something to casual to something deeper than either of them ever dared to dream of. It brings a pleasure far greater than any physical action has ever wrought. He reaches down, taking Keith’s cock in his hand and stroking it, coaxing a gasp and moan from the man beneath him.
“James,” Keith pants; his hands grip tighter to his shoulders, legs moving to wrap around his hips to pull him in deeper. “I can’t…I’m gonna-ah!”
James slants his mouth over Keith’s milking him slowly through his orgasm. He feels his own drawing ever closer, abdomen drawing tight. His pace speeds up ever so slightly and, with a shout of Keith’s name, he spills inside the condom. Panting he rests, pulling away from Keith’s mouth; he chuckles as he sees that just like before Keith has already passed out in his bed, chest rising and falling steadily. He slowly pulls out and makes quick work of cleaning the both of them up. He pulls the covers up, and allows himself to fall asleep to the sight of Keith in his bed.
In the morning James presses himself against Keith’s back with a kiss to his shoulder, intertwining their fingers together, and feels like old wounds can finally begin to heal.
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fernthewriter · 5 years
Text
SFAM
some facts about myself I'm 21 years old I'm both left and right-handed I don’t have a middle name I don't eat goats cheese I'm a terrible driver and have this insatiable hunger for bad jokes and and good pizza I believe there are only two kinds of people in the world those who admit they've peed in the shower and Liars I'm not religious my faith in God vanished when My grandma died But I was introduced to poetry and my dreams and now I can't help but think that maybe heaven is not something we need to die to get to I go to a a community College which means I’m probably poor because I’m not attending a university and society sees you as an average dude when in reality you probably got more brains then the rich folks who live in the hills
My father is the only man I know who never skips a homemade meal and is loyal to his dishwashing duties He’s married to the most amazing woman I know which happens to be my mother a woman who would cook my lunch every day
You see my mother always reminds me that my name is an earthquake waiting she says i hold in your mouth like the most dangerous secret this world is yet to know I'm only 5 foot 7 on a good day but I’ve learned being built like a short story is a lesson in finding other ways to be the tallest tale in the room
I don't know what it means to be a man and for a while I thought the weight room could tell me but I've heard stories of men with shotgun barrels for arms who used their bodies as weapons I've seen them shoot poles and women's spirits and my sister says that they raised me to be a good guy But I have a set of knuckles still swollen with the memory of other boys teeth and blood and I'm still learning to unlearn violence I'm reminded everyday that a righteous heart inside a male body is just a gun with a safety left on boys who are still trying to find their manhood in bottles. bank accounts and between nameless hips boys who remote control their partners because they're not strong enough to let go know Us men carry an addiction to property in our blood that when i was a kid i shoplifted things that didn't actually need or want just to feel like there was something in this world that I could own I know the most beautiful thing about love is that it cannot be owned I don't watch much TV these days but i'm still a nickelodeon kid at heart so if you asked me who loves orange soda I will tell you
I've broken More of my own bones then promises in my life I'm still not sure which one has been more difficult to heal I have heart the same size as a fist and I didn't find self-love until I gave myself a beating but I was the tree that fell in a forest when no one was there to hear and dared to make a sound
I'm the meal that this thing called depression has spent seven years trying to eat from the inside out I'm living proof that a fool bit off more than he could chew I believe there is nothing more than a story than a scar so every time I see the remains I've carved into my skin I read the story of a battle I win every day I used to wake up breathless when anxiety was deadly and now I'm so sick I've got Depression scared to catch me I am both brown and boy which means that I’m the knife that threatens to slip the neck of silence and make everything bleed
i am a song That can dive i can be resurrected by music and the dance floor is the safest place to be during the apocalypse I'm still trying to figure out how to hold on to this helium balloon called happiness I've got charisma down to a science but most days I have less confidence than English weather but I'm learning every day what it means to be human without being whole every night the sky opens its mouth and swallows the Sun in a single gulp just to make sure the moon can shine the night and they share the same room what a wonderful way to live life to be so full of so much light but always hungry for more
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imagine-loki · 6 years
Text
dear diary
TITLE: Dear Diary
CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 2 of 4 AUTHOR: Eclectica-posts ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine Loki comforting you when you’re crying. He knows exactly what to do or say to help you through it. RATING: Mature, with a lot more mature in further chapters.  NOTES/WARNINGS:
THOR RAGNAROK SPOILERS
Smut, fluff and bad jokes.
The children of Asgard weren’t the only ones of that cliff in Norway.
Sophie recalls the events of Sakaar and Ragnarok from her point of view, as she found herself thrust into a Universe beyond her imagining, and meets a familiar face.
— This is Chapter 2, 2 more to be uploaded, smut sort of starts in this one starts from Chapter 2.
Story so far can be found at Archive of our own
Canon compliant, it’s written with the same timeline and series of events as per Thor Ragnarok - like a story line that happened but didn’t make it into the film.
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The big tournament fights luckily didn’t happen that often, I think mainly because the Grandmaster was currently quite short of contenders, so he had devised other ways of passing the time.
This, unlike the fight, I do remember clearly.
“We have to do what???” I cried as I picked and clutched a minute gold bikini in disbelief.
“The Grandmaster likes to show his gladiators off to his top clients so they clean us up, oil us down and get us to serve drinks and generally walk around looking buff” said Korg who was trying, and failing, to pick up a long length of the same gold fabric with his huge boulder hands.
“You might have to help me with this loin-cloth actually, Mike used to do it, but…” Korg looked as sad as a face made of granite could for a moment “and I’m not asking Miekke” he concluded, rather sensibly since his friend had knives for hands.
“And do it tight, last time I had women trying to play with my pebbles all night” Despite the appalling situation about to unfold I burst into helpless giggles.
“It wasn’t funny” Korg sniffed, hurt by my laughter. I patted his arm consolingly, accidently starting a small rockfall of shale.
From my studies in Roman history when I was an undergrad student, I knew that this had been a common ritual back back on Earth - all the rich and powerful liked a bit of rough to grope and leer at. Only thing was  I had never thought I’d be the bit of rough.
The only upside of the whole demeaning thing was that I got the chance to have a wash and change into something other than the leather armour I’d been wearing for days. A team of giggling women had descended into the gladiator pen tasked with getting us ready for the evening’s entertainment. The two that had brushed and done up my hair looked quite annoyed they had missed out on helping one of the other male fighters who were taking great delight in being oiled all over.
They awkwardly held the perfumed oil bottle out to me, but I declined. I looked silly enough wearing a bikini with a little train of fabric attached to my arse like a chicken, let alone being shiny. The gold arm rings they wrapped around my upper arms were a nice touch though, I had to concede, and they hide the scar of my healing war-wound. They might also come in useful as I could try and ram them down the throat of anyone who tried to touch my pebbles or anything else.
Deciding I should find out how ridiculous I really did look, I tentatively stepped in front of a full length mirror. My blonde hair had been curled and pinned up so I looked less scruffy than usual when it was down on my shoulders loose. As someone who on Earth wore a one piece and who had always felt a little too big, a little too chunky I was shocked that I was delighted by the reflection staring back at me. My body looked strong but lush - curves and strength combined. For all I hated the idea of a bikini it certainly did great things for my boobs, I had to admit. I felt like a warrior princess and the knowledge that I still had Loki’s knife in my boot gave me a sense of power and confidence.
The column of gladiators made an impressive sight as we walked silently and impassively into the huge neon-lit ballroom, pulsing with techo synth. We were directed to stand along the wall, like a live art installation or cattle market. We were the walking advertising for the power and wealth of the Grandmaster while the guests danced languidly or lounged on huge bright velvet couches. As the only woman in the line I could feel the eyes of the party goers on my body so I made sure I kept my eyes resolutely above their heads and looked i around room instead, taking in the fantastically dressed party goers.
We’d been warned that any violence or attempt at escape would have rather fatal consequences, but I still couldn’t keep my eyes from darting to the guarded doors looking for an opportunity to find a way out. Of course, even if I’d made it out the doors I had no idea how to get back to Earth, and outside the city seemed more perilous than in here. Frankly, after seeing what lived out in the rubbish dumps, dying in the arena was a better way to go than being cannibalised.
Slowly I realised that one by one the gladiators were being called away by the guests, chosen like cakes from a window front. They followed their new masters either looking rather pleased when they had been selected by an attractive woman or man or impassively if their new ‘friend’ was less to their liking. The line was getting shorter and shorter, and this was one time that I was definitely not going to be concerned about being picked last for the team. This was one game I did not want to play.
“Hello there pretty, are you a pussy cat or a tiger?” simpered a short fat man, with more chins than I’d thought physically possible to possess. He was so diminutive that I hadn’t seen him walk up to me as he was so far below my eyeline. Dressed in a shiny silver wrap he reminded me of a well done baked potato in tin-foil. Worse than his appearance was that I realised that in his hands he held two chains, each attached around the necks of two miserable looking young girls, thin, mottled with bruises and even more underdressed than me.
“I, I…” I stammered. Of course we had been warned that saying no wasn’t an option, it would be seen as the deepest offence to the Grandmaster’s friends, but I knew that there was no way I could go anywhere near this person and do whatever it was he was going to expect me to do.
I was abruptly aware of a presence close by my side, his scent now familiar. Where the hell had he come from, I wondered. I hadn’t spotted him the room. Not that I had been looking, of course.
“Lord Perris, Your Magnificence, apologies for my rude intrusion but I happened to notice you appeared to be giving this unworthy specimen the gift of your company.” I gave Loki a surprised look, wondering where he was going with this, not sure whether to be insulted or grateful. Loki ignored me completely, smiling in a concerned and deeply attentive manner at my new friend.
“While I can understand your initial interest, I thought it only best to warn you. Last week I had the unfortunate experience of spending some time with this creature, and I could not in good conscious allow you to make the same grave error.” He concluded, giving me a stern look. Taking his lead, I tried to look suitably admonished and shamed, while desperately trying to hide a smile.
“But sir, whatever do you mean? If you mean she’s not biddable, then I have more than enough experience at breaking their spirits” the baked potato simpered back in reply.
Loki lent down and whispered something in his ear. Perris visibly recoiled, staring in horror at me. I had no idea what he had said, but it must have been bad to put him off. He patted Loki on the arm “you poor man, I must commend you for saving me from such a distasteful experience! Come, we go!” he spun on his heels, his two slaves dragged in his wake. I watched him waddle off and then share the news with with others from his group, all of whom then shot me equally appalled looks.
“What did you say to him?” I whispered.
“That you gave me an incredibly awful rash and I almost lost my manhood to the infection. It was touch and go for a while there I told him” Loki whispered back, still gifting the room with his charming smile. I was so relieved I broke out into giggles but quickly tried to look solemn, and even a bit apologetic for my diseased state.
“I think it may be best for you to leave before you attract any further attention” he added, taking my hand in his.
I followed him to a quieter side chamber, mostly empty except for two low couches and walls covered in book shelves. It was beautiful, I had always loved libraries and this was awe inspiring, books and scrolls gathered on hundreds of shelves, just waiting to be explored. I opened up a gorgeously bound volume and sighed in regret - I’d been silly of course to expect it to be in any language I could speak. The text was foreign to me and impenetrable.
“Give it to me” Loki held out his hands and gently took the book from me. He made a small gesture with his right hand and a pale green light illuminated the pages. He handed it back and each page was now in written in elegant script - in English.
“Now that’s impressive!” I gazed around me, a whole library, thousands of texts, all there for the reading - most never seen before by someone from Earth, and with Loki’s magic…
“Would you like a drink?”, I nodded and eagerly accepted a goblet of something that turned out to taste a bit like champagne, but sweeter and, looking back now, probably a lot more alcoholic. I wasn’t concerned about that at the time and managed to neck it in two gulps. Ah, all that practice I had got at university was coming in handy. I helped myself to another.
He motioned for me to sit on the couch not far from him. We were opposite each other, within touching distance but not touching. He gave me another of the appraising glances he seemed to specialise in, a glance that made the tightness in my stomach leap and my head feel whoozy, although that could have been the wine .
I was all too aware that sitting brought my ample bosom even more in his eye line. I was also conscious of my little tummy roll, and placed her hands on her lap to hide it, then instantly rebuked myself for being worried with he thought of me. His presence made me feel, complicated? I didn’t trust him, although to his credit he hadn’t done anything to hurt me, but his past made me wary. That didn’t stop me becoming more and more aware just how attractive he was, his pale skin, dark hair and cheekbones you could slice cheese on.
“Everytime I see you you seem to be wearing less and less. Is this some sort of desperate cry for attention?” he smirked, leaning forward as his voice grew lower
I wasn’t quite sure how to answer that, so I stayed silent, and sipped my third drink.
“Now…I remember that when it was a choice of death or…other options “ His eyes left my eyes and lazily trailed down my neck and to the top of my breasts.
“..you seemed quite keen to choose death. While you have been surprisingly resilient, I thought that perhaps you would like to reconsider your answer pet?”
Through the alcohol fuelled fog I became aware that he might be propositioning me.
“Well, given I have yet to apparently die, I really depends i suppose” I replied slowly after a pause, my heart beating fast.
“will it be horrible, long, slow and painful?” I smiled
He chuckled. “probably”
“Hmm..and the death option?”
He threw back his head with laughter, giving me a split second to try reach for the blade in my boot, slightly hampered by holding a wine glass at the same time and feeling ever so slightly not very coordinated. Just as quickly though, he’d cast it out of my hand and grabbed me, pulling me onto his couch and basically onto his lap. He was holding me,one arm wrapped over my hips, the other higher, his hand grazing my right breast. I sat frozen for a minute, his breath on my neck, painfully aware of the thinness of the fabric of my bikini, and the warmth and hardness of his leather clad body behind me.
“Stop playing games and stop fighting me. I’m being nice, but I can make you submit to me you know”
“I could make you beg for me” Loki whispered into my ear as a shiver engulfed my whole body.
His hand left my breast and touched my forehead, and I felt a strange sensation in my head, like a pulling, and although it wasn’t logical, I knew he was there, in my mind and in my thoughts. I heard him hiss as he recognised the depth of my desire and the dying echoes of my fear of him. His hand slide from my hip down into the cleft of my thighs. I so desperately wanted to spread my legs and welcome him into my core that I could feel growing wetter by the second.  “Oh pet, I can feel how much you want me..give in to it…you and I are going to have so much fun…”
Using perhaps my entire lifetime of willpower, I pulled myself away from his grasp and to my feet, standing just outside of the reach of his arms. I raised my hands, in a more metaphorical, rather than serious attempt to fend off any further advances. He looked… amused.
I have no idea how I looked, but I knew how I felt - drunk, horny and yet increasingly angry. The horny part of me wanted to walk over, undo his leather pants and impale myself on his cock, riding him until I came in shuddering ecstasy. (LOL, If I knew what I knew now, I wouldn’t have been able to stop myself.)
But there was another voice in my head, drunk sure, but hurt and angry, and it drowned out everything else.
He sat there, always so sure that I would throw myself at him, and always with the subtle threats if I didn’t. I knew he had magic, and I knew he could probably use mind control. Well, fuck him, fuck them all. He’d been having a lovely time making new friends and partying. I’d been thrown into a cell and made to fight for my life. I chose to ignore that some of that outcome may have been down to my own choices, but still, it definitely didn’t seem fair.
I realized with sudden clarity that I’d done that too many times before, given in to my feelings, said yes only to later regret it. I’d always been the one to give in, back down, make excuses for their actions, make all the effort, make the running - all so I wouldn’t be alone. That’s the real reason I’d put up with my ex for so long even after his comments and his insensitivity ripped me apart. I had simply been too scared to be by myself after my mother had died. She’d been alone, been with no one else since my father, so was I that desperate not to end up like her?
But I was alone, because everyone had walked away, and I was so sure, that if I gave in now, it would happen again. And I couldn’t do that. Not again, not that pain, it had been bad enough being rejected by a man in the past, but to be rejected by a God?
Someone else might have gotten teary, I, well, I got sweary.
“Look, arsehole, with your smile and your leather, I want a lot of stuff that I know is bad for me, liking eating chocolate for breakfast and cocktails all day instead of going to work. But, I don’t do them, just because my body wants something, doesn’t mean my mind is going to agree, so don’t think you know what I want!” I was flustered, but to my credit I was still managing to resist the urge to run to him and climb him like a tree.
“Anyway, why is this always about me? Wanting me to beg, wanting me to submit you, why you get to sit there, fully clothed, and all …leathery?” I was getting quite into this now. Did I mention the three glasses of wine?
I closed the gap between us and poked him in the chest with my finger. He looked down at my finger and arched an eyebrow. This may not have been the usual mortal behaviour he was used to.
“Is it some weird God thing? Why the power games and the threats? God, I’d shag Mr Potato Head out there if it meant I could spend an hour in here with these books and in peace. Making someone submit to you out of fear or a worse alternative isn’t power you know. It’s not hard” I was quickly running out of steam as he continued to stare at me impassively. I had no idea what he was thinking.
“I know you are the god of mischief, or chaos or green… whatever, but seriously. I think you are so used to stirring shit up and laughing as we all run around screaming that you don’t even why you do it any more. We are just playthings - little chess pieces you throw across a board for a laugh.” He wasn’t smiling anymore.
“Why not decide what you actually want, not what chaos you can cause, and then have the guts to stop the threats and the tricks and actually ask for it? Preferably nicely. Maybe even use the word please. Unless you’re scared people would say no” I finished, although what I really had wanted to add was: and in case you are wondering, I wouldn’t say no. Not now, not since I met you, even though it made no sense, even though I had no idea what he was capable of, I wouldn’t have said no.
Dear gods, he was quick and strong, he was up and grabbing my arm, pulling me into him before I had a chance to move. He put his lips to my ear.
“I want…”
Steps echoed in the room and I could feel him freeze. The pressure in my arm suddenly increased as Loki twisted my wrist so I yelped with pain. He turned to the intruders with his usual charming smile firmly in place. It was the entourage of the Grandmaster - masked bodyguards accompanying their leader, who hovering like a Dalek in a floating chair, had made no sound. He smiled at us disconcertingly, looking from one to the other, curious and obviously seeking an explanation for what he had walked/hovered in on.
“My lord. Apologies for manhandling your property.” said Loki, sounding like a charming, but very apologetic guest, “I was just reminding her of what I did to the last mortals I came across who didn’t cooperate with a God” he paused, and gave me a cold dismissive look “But actually, on second thoughts, they do rather tend to break too easily to be diverting” he flung my arm away, and I was left standing there, rubbing my aching wrist.
The Grandmaster, shared a questioning glance with Topaz who had stomped in after the group, looking as dour as ever.
“I’ll find you a more pleasing diversion, but first I think I’ve decided the party is over” He motioned to his guards, two of whom took my arms and walked me away, although I didn’t resist. After whatever that had been I was more than happy to leave their company and go back to my nice cell with Korg and the simplicity of being with people who mostly didn’t talk to me or could be discouraged from coming near me with a blade. It would also give me time to sober up and try to remember what the hell I had said, and possibly even more time to work out why I had said it. Argh, had I really told a God to say please?
I probably shouldn’t admit that I spent the next couple of days going over what the hell he might actually have been going to say, or whatever the hell the whole damned encounter actually even meant.
I considered various possible options for what he was going to actually say, and calculated probability likelihoods for each. Example: “I want”… hmm, ‘to make you scream and bleed and die painfully until I feel slightly better about my thwarted attempt to rule your planet’ - seemed quite likely
‘I want to have a 3 year relationship with you but then decide that actually I want someone more ‘emotionally available’ (which seemed to mean even blonder, thinner and less damaged by the death of her mother) - that one seemed relatively unlikely I had to concede.
Also unlikely was the reason he’d given to the Grandmaster, I didn’t understand the dynamic between those two, but I didn’t believe that Loki had really been about to say what he did - although, knowing (or should I say, not really knowing) Loki, I could have been completely wrong. I gave it a 50-50 odds.
More likely though it was ‘I want you to shut up, you drunk cow, because I want a quick fuck and then never see you again while you hopefully die in a stinking prison while I wile away my hours drinking more of this wine and plotting my next evil deeds. And shagging everything in sight”. And we have a winner! Fucker.
Oops, I suppose I should have mentioned that by the time I was in Day Two of ‘What would Loki Have Said’, his brother had arrived. He looked less pleased to be there than I did and apart from a quick exchange of hellos, and oh, are you from Earth and me slightly putting my foot in it by saying sorry to hear Jane had dumped him, we left each other alone to our own thoughts. Well I did, Korg chatted to him. A lot.
Also, I was feeling very much over Gods in general, and possibly slightly sulking that I hadn’t heard or seen Loki since the library. Oh, until he had suddenly appeared in front of Thor the day after his arrival.
I was sitting to his right, a little around the curve of the cell wall from him. When he materialised I sat stock still, hoping he wouldn’t notice me. Luckily he seemed much more concerned with his brother, who seemed to have as much time for him as I did and was lazily throwing small stones through Loki’s body. Something in me relaxed when I realised belatedly he wasn’t actually there in person, and so I laughed as Thor managed to get a shot right through Loki’s smug head.
Loki heard the sound and for a moment diverted his attention from Thor to me “Oh I see you’ve met my little pet. Don’t let her near the wine whatever you do” he winked. I hefted a large stone though his chest, which made a gratifying clunk as it hit the wall behind him. Loki laughed and disappeared.
“Piss off Ghost!” Korg stomped on Loki’s departed shadow.
“So, I see you’ve met my brother?” Thor asked
“Your brother is…” I stopped, not sure if I should give a frank opinion of his sibling, although to be honest, they didn’t seem to have the best relationship either. I was also wishing the English language had a word for ‘someone who you would like to simultaneously take you over and over again in all the worse possible ways, while slapping them around the head for being so bloody annoying and yet also a little afraid they might try and stab you’. I bet the Germans have a word for that…
“Selfish? Charming? Self centred? Capable of great evil? Ambitious? A complete pain in the arse?” he ventured. I laughed and then grew silent.
“Is he the same man he was when he attacked Earth? Is there any capacity for kindness in him?” I asked softly, embarrassed by my question, but unable not to ask it.
Thor bit back a quick retort, and sighed
“I don’t know, sometimes I think he regrets the things that he has done, and can care for others, in his own way, but I don’t honestly know” I could feel him looking at my curiously, but I avoided his gaze.
“He loved your mother and Odin, of course, even though he felt betrayed by him. But losing Frigga hurt him deeply. Think he feels like he’s betrayed her memory and now there’s no way back. I think he takes what he wants through force and pain and control because he doesn’t think anyone would show him kindness or love. It would make him too vulnerable…” I stopped as I looked up and saw Thor staring at me intently, his face confused.
“How do you know our mother’s name?” he asked quietly. “ Did Loki tell you this? Did Jane tell you?”
I shook my head, a bit taken aback by his reaction.
“No, I just…just ignore me. Too little sleep and too much stress - I’m going mad” I laughed until he looked away.
I rubbed my forehead, realising that I didn’t know how I knew this, where it had all come from. I knew he hadn’t told me, because we’d barely talked in truth. We certainly weren’t at the deep and meaningful, talk about your feelings and past traumatic events stage.
No, it felt more like unlocking the memory of a dream, except I knew it was true - I knew what Loki felt, I’d sensed it clear as day. Somewhere in the depths of my mind I began to feel the same ache in my temples that I’d felt at the party when Loki had touched me - and it all came rushing back.
I knew he’d read my emotions and thoughts, but what I hadn’t realised at the time was that it had been a two way street. Had he realised this? I hadn’t even known until now, so maybe not. How he would react I couldn’t predict, but I wasn’t in a rush to tell him that I’d seen his pain and his fragility. And then I remembered what other emotions I’d picked up from him.
Oh. My stomach, and slightly lower parts, did a little flip. Oh indeed. Although, I thought with a smile, I’m still going to make him say please.
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pedroscurls · 7 years
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Title: Now, What Do We Have Here?
@laymetorest77​ requested: Hey there! Would it be too much trouble to request a smutty (as fuck) one-shot of Simon & Negan walking in on the reader masturbating, then it leads to a (possible) 3-some?
Character(s): Negan, Reader, Simon  Summary: You have been living in the Sanctuary for two months now and neither men showed any interest towards you. Though, it is a good thing that you’ve got a vivid imagination and after a long day at work, you decide to let out some steam. Word Count: 3,979 Warning: SMUT! LIKE TONS OF SMUT! DIRTY TALK, TOO!  Author’s Note: Okay, I’ll take any reason to write more of Negan x Reader x Simon stories. So, thank you @laymetorest77 for requesting this! I hope it was okay, and very very smutty ;-)
(GIF Source: @justnegan || @heartfulloffandoms)
You have been at the Sanctuary for two months now. You thought stumbling upon Negan and his men were going to be the worst decision that you made, but after adjusting to the point system and the job that was assigned to you, you started to like it in this community. You knew you could finally call this place home, which was something that had become nonexistent in this new world.
Aside from the quick adjustment, you were obviously attracted to both Negan and Simon. The way they both exuded power and confidence made you constantly wonder how they would be like in the bedroom.
But, they were the two top men in the Sanctuary and the chances of you ever getting together with one of them was highly unlikely. Still, though, you enjoyed watching them work. Negan always sported the leather jacket and his bat was always propped over his shoulder. Simon, on the other hand, seemed to always wear button down shirts that clung to his muscles.
You always got excited when you caught a glimpse of them in the cafeteria; they never visited the library anyway.
When Negan gave you the job as a librarian, you were hoping he would make some sort of dirty comment about having some odd fantasy of fucking a librarian, but you knew he wasn’t interested when he just left the room to let you work. You wondered if it was because you weren’t pretty enough.
Simon, though, you didn’t understand why he never made his move. You found him constantly glancing in your direction whenever he was eating in the cafeteria. You wondered why he never uttered a single word to you aside from the first few days of your stay at the Sanctuary.
Today, however, was a slow day at the library. Not many people liked to come here. Since the world ended, books became an afterthought and no one ever decided to pick up a book to read while the dead was walking. Though, you enjoyed the few people – which were kids – that liked to visit. It made your day much more exciting and worthwhile when the kids were laughing and smiling when you read to them.
It reminded you that there was still innocence and beauty in this world.
Before lunch, you had read to a group of kids. You were reading Hamlet, but made sure to speak in a way that they understood what was going on. You were surprised to see that this book by Shakespeare were on the shelves.
When it was time to go to the cafeteria, you closed the door to the library and locked it behind you. You pocketed the key and walked to the lunchroom, noticing many people standing in line while others were already beginning to eat. It always surprised you to see how many people were living here.
It gave you hope that the old world could be restored.
Once you received your tray of food in exchange for some of your points, you sat at one of the empty tables. You looked around, and suddenly your eyes caught Negan and Simon. They seemed like they were talking amongst one another; it must have been a serious conversation from the lack of smiling and laughter.
You kept your eyes on them, watching as both men ate. You let your eyes trail over the stubble that littered Negan’s face, tinged with streaks of grey. Simon had this ridiculous mustache that only he was able to pull off. You began to wonder what it would feel like between your legs.
Sighing, you shook your head and continued to eat your own food. You couldn’t get the image of both men sitting next to one another out of your mind. It was as if they were torturing you because the only men you were even remotely interested in were not interested in you.
Or, so you thought.
Negan and Simon both looked up. They caught your eye and furrowed a brow when you immediately looked away as if you were caught staring. Negan smirked, wiping his lips with a napkin before he rested his hand on the end of Lucille.
“[Y/N] staring at us, again?” Negan asked.
Simon chuckled, “She is. When are we going to stop teasing her? We both know she’s beautiful.”
“I’m waiting for her to make the move. She’s taking her time apparently. I mean, two fuckin’ months and she hasn’t said a damn thing?”
“What do you want her to say? I mean, we haven’t necessarily shown that we’re interested,” Simon argued.
“When we found her, she was scared. Hell, she couldn’t even look at us, Simon. What the hell did you want to do?”
“Okay, okay. I get your point.”
“Plus, I’ve got an idea that we can put into effect tonight. We can drop by her room, make sure she’s settling in nicely… She hasn’t spoken to us alone yet, so I’m sure she’ll let a few things slip,” Negan suggested.
“What makes you so sure?”
“I know women. I thought that was fuckin’ obvious,” he smirked.
Simon rolled his eyes, “You’re chasing another piece of pussy when you’ve got five at your disposal. I don’t get you, Negan.”
“Why have one when you can have multiple?” Negan chuckled.
“Yeah, yeah. Lucky bastard. But just so we’re clear, [Y/N] is both ours. Not yours. Not mine. Ours.”
Negan arched a brow, “I fuckin’ know, Simon. Besides, what if she decides she only wants me?”
“Not a fuckin’ chance. I saw the way she was looking at me,” Simon replied.
“All right, Simon. We’ll see.”
Later that night, you finally closed the library. It was such a slow and tiring day that you needed to let out some steam. You knew exactly what you were going to do once you made it back to your bedroom. Seeing Negan and Simon in the lunchroom today was enough for you to imagine what it would be like if they were interested in you.
You walked into your room and shut the door behind you. You grabbed your towel and walked inside the connected bathroom. You knew you weren’t able to take a long, refreshing bath like you were used to in the old world, but you didn’t complain.
You stepped into the shower once the water was warm enough, shutting your eyes once it hit your body. You tossed your head back and allowed the water to dampen your locks, bringing your hands to run through it.
You finished your shower within ten minutes, especially since Negan instilled the rule that showers weren’t supposed to last longer than that. Afterwards, you wrapped your dampened hair into your towel and slipped on a pair of cotton panties and a large white t-shirt that reached your upper thighs.
You settled into your bed and exhaled a contented sigh. Every night, you reveled in the fact that you had a place to sleep, a bed to lie on, and four walls to protect you from the outside world.
You shut your eyes and imagined Negan and Simon waltzing into your bedroom to show you just how badly they wanted you. You imagined Negan’s scruff in between legs and Simon’s large hands caressing your body.
At that image, you dropped your hand in between your legs. Your finger ran along your clothed sex, whimpering at the contact as you continued to imagine Negan and Simon.
Slowly, you lowered your panties and set it aside. You circled your clit slowly, wondering just exactly how Negan and Simon would take you. You imagined that their manhood would be well-endowed and pushing into you would be slightly painful, but overall pleasurable.
You slid your finger into your walls and gasped, moaning quietly at the intrusion. You used your other hand to grasp onto your breast, Negan and Simon being the main center of your imagination.
“Negan…” you moaned, tossing your head back.
“Simon…” you added.
Negan and Simon began to walk to your room. They wondered what they would say to you, but as they neared the door, they heard your quiet moans.
“Wait, what if she already has someone?” Simon asked.
“Do you hear anyone else but her in that damn room, Simon? Come on.” Negan smirked, hearing the moans and your quiet utterances of Negan and Simon’s name. “You hear that? She’s probably fuckin’ touching herself at the thought of us.”
Simon smiled, hearing his name escape your lips. “Should we knock?”
“Let’s indulge in a bit of voyeurism, shall we?” Negan smirked.
Slowly, Negan opened the door and caught a glimpse of you touching yourself. He bit his lower lip, using one hand to run over the front of his pants, palming himself. “Well, I’ll be damned…”
Simon looked over Negan’s shoulder, widening his eyes at the sight.
You moved your finger in and out of your depths, continuing to moan Negan and Simon’s name as your other hand caressed your own breast. Your eyes were shut and you were stuck in your own imagination to realize that Simon and Negan had stepped inside of your room.
Negan let his eyes rake over your body, focusing on your hand that was in between your legs. Suddenly, he cleared his throat to let you know of his and Simon’s presence in the room. You opened your eyes and gasped, scurrying to grab your pillow to cover your lower half.
“W – What?” you mumbled,
“Having a bit of fun after a long day at work, doll?” Negan smirked.
“I – I just…”
“Just what? Touching yourself?” Simon interrupted.
“Well, yes, but –”
“Oh, [Y/N]…” Negan grinned.
You widened your eyes in surprise, “You – You know my name?”
“Of course we do. You’re too beautiful to just forget,” Simon smiled.
You blushed, sneakily grabbing your panties to slip back on before Negan shook his head. He reached out, resting a hand over your own before he took the panties away from your grasp. He looked down at the fabric and smirked, pocketing your panties before he slowly pulled away the pillow that was covering you.
“So, tell me, [Y/N]… How have you adjusted to the Sanctuary?” he asked, running his fingertips along your bare legs.
“I – It’s good… Thank you for taking me in,” you smiled, shivering at the feel of his hands finally touching you.
Simon sat next to you, looking down at you with a smile on his face. “You always sleep in this attire?”
“Sometimes I sleep naked,” you teased.
Negan arched a brow, “She’s fuckin’ with us.”
You giggled, nodding in agreement. Though, your laughter died down instantly when you felt Negan’s finger run along the length of your sex. You slowly tossed your head back, spreading your legs for Negan to continue.
“She’s soaked, Simon…” Negan commented, looking at you with lustful eyes. He removed his leather jacket, setting it aside and kneeling down before you. He leaned down and smirked from between your legs, kissing your inner thighs lightly.
“Have you imagined what it’d be like if this shit happened, doll?” Negan asked, his lips inching closer to your sex.
“Y – Yes, oh god, Negan… Please…”
“You see that Simon? I didn’t even have to ask her to say please. This girl’s got manners. I think we should reward her. What do you think?”
Simon nodded, leaning over to cup your cheek gently. You turned your head to face him, noticing that he was inching closer for your lips to touch. “I think we should. She seems like she’d be a good girl. Right, [Y/N]?”
“Yes… I’ll be good…”
Simon smiled, leaning in to press his lips against your own. You gasped, allowing yourself to succumb to the pleasure. You never thought your fantasies would come true, but here you were.
You suddenly pulled away from the kiss when you felt Negan’s lips finally attach to your clit. You tossed your head back and grasped the bedsheets tightly, your toes curling. You tried to squeeze your legs together before Negan shook his head, holding your legs apart with his strong hands.
“No, no, doll… Let me fuckin’ eat this sweet pussy,” Negan smirked.
“Just lie back and relax,” Simon said, his lips running over your jawline lightly.
You nodded, grabbing the end of your large t-shirt. You pulled it over your head to reveal your bare upper half and you tossed it aside carelessly. Simon grunted at the sight of you, moving his fingertips along your chest, circling your nipple teasingly.
“God fucking dammit,” you mumbled, arching your back at the feel of Negan’s lips attaching to your clit. You shivered at the pleasure that raked through your body. Before the end of the world, you would have never divulged in a threesome with two other men, but with Negan and Simon… You were willing to do things you never thought you would do.
Your hand dropped to Simon’s lap, feeling his growing erection from inside his pants. You could feel the thickness and you gasped, looking down when Simon latched his lips onto your nipple.
“Oh my god…” you moaned, feeling Negan continue to suck onto your clit as he used two fingers to slide into your depths. “Please…”
Negan smirked, adding more pressure to your clit as he moved his fingers rapidly inside of you. You could feel yourself near your climax, and with the added pleasure that Simon was giving you, you knew that you were going to finally reach an orgasm that you couldn’t have done by yourself.
“Fuck!” you moaned loudly, your walls clenching around Negan’s fingers as you finally hit your release. Your body shook slightly, wanting to shut your legs but Negan held them apart. You tried to recompose yourself, panting heavily at the intensity of your climax.
Simon smirked, pulling back to remove his shirt and undo his pants. You looked over at him, slowly straddling his waist to kiss along his exposed chest and down to his abdomen. You let your fingertips run across the chiseled muscles before undoing his belt buckle and unzipping his pants.
“No no… I just made you fuckin’ come, and you’re going to pay attention to Simon?” Negan said, gently pulling you from your bed. “On your knees, [Y/N].”
You grinned at his assertiveness, kneeling in front of him. Simon stood up, shrugging off his shirt before he pushed down his pants and boxers to reveal himself. You cleared your throat at the sight of his length.
Negan removed his white t-shirt and pushed his pants down to his ankles, kicking it to the side. You glanced up at him, reaching out to wrap your hand around his girth, licking your lips. You were right. Both men were well-endowed and you couldn’t wait until they were inside of you.
“Your fuckin’ touch feels amazing,” Negan smirked, using a hand to stroke your hair back. You reached over with your free hand to wrap around Simon, slowly stroking both men. Their sounds of pleasure made you squeeze your legs, which did not go unnoticed by the both of them.
“Mm, doll, how about you get us ready before we fuck you?” Negan smirked.
You bit your lower lip. You always loved the dirty talk in the bedroom. Slowly, you leaned forward to wrap your lips around Negan’s rounded tip. You shut your eyes and began to bob your head, simply wanting to speed this process to feel them within your depths.
As you bobbed your head against Negan, you stroked Simon’s length. Your saliva lubricated Negan’s manhood before you pulled away to pay attention to Simon as well.
“Shit, doll…” Negan said, watching you move your lips along Simon’s length.
Simon tossed his head back slightly, shutting his eyes as he held your hair away from your face. You leaned forward, allowing his tip to hit your throat, causing you to gag on his dick. You pulled back, standing up and running your hand down your abdomen.
“You look like you’re ready for us,” Simon smiled.
“I am… I’ve been waiting for this moment.”
“Oh, have you?” Negan grinned. “How about you tell us exactly what you want, doll?”
“How about I show you?”
Simon smirked, “God, we’re going to like you.”
Negan smiled, nodding. “All right, doll. Show us.”
“Well, first… I want to ride you, Negan.” you whispered, slowly pushing on Negan’s shoulders so he would fall back onto the bed. You watched as he propped himself on his elbows, his dick resting against his abdomen in full erect. You straddled his waist, holding his member to align against your entrance.
You ran his tip across your wet length, watching as Negan shut his eyes in anticipation. “If you don’t stop this fuckin’ teasing, I will slam into you and I’ll be sure to fuck you until you cannot walk anymore, [Y/N].”
“Mm, that sounds very tempting.”
“Fuck it.” Negan grasped your hips and slammed upwards into you, bringing your hips down so that you felt every inch of his dick. “Holy fuck…”
You gasped, arching your back at the sudden intrusion. You rested your hands on his chest, remaining still for a moment to allow yourself to adjust to him. This was so much better than your imagination.
You began to bounce along Negan’s length, gasping every time he thrusted upwards. You shut your eyes and buried your face against Negan’s neck, rolling your hips rapidly against his own before a sudden climax hit your body. You clamped down onto his manhood and he groaned, rolling you onto your back before he pulled out of you.
“Shit, already?” Negan smirked. “Don’t worry, doll. I’m not fuckin’ done with you yet.”
You nodded, panting heavily. Before you could process what he was going to do next, Simon took you by surprise when you slid into your depths. Unlike Negan, he made sure to take his time. He ran his hand across your abdomen and up to your breast, grabbing it gently as he slowly began to move in a rhythmic pace.
Negan kneeled next to your head and you looked up at him to see that he was stroking himself in front of you. You leaned your head over in his direction and wrapped your lips around his tip. He groaned, shutting his eyes as he stroked his base while you paid attention to his head.
Simon smirked to himself, delivering a sharp thrust that caused you to pull away from Negan to let a loud moan escape your lips.
“Please, Simon… Harder…” you begged.
“Harder? Oh, you’ll get it harder all right,” Simon winked.
Suddenly, he grasped your hips and slammed into you repeatedly. With every thrust, you felt him all the way up to your abdomen, causing you to gasp with each movement. You knew you wouldn’t be able to walk tomorrow morning, but it didn’t matter. You had fantasized about both men and now it was finally happening.
“Simon… Oh god…” you moaned, moving your hands to the bedsheets and grasping onto it tightly.
Without any warning, you tightened around him, reaching yet another climax. Your body shook slightly, causing Simon to slam into your, remaining still as he placed light kisses along your collarbone. “Damn it, you are tight…”
Simon pulled out and watched you with a smile, running his hand down the front of your body.
Negan suddenly turned you around, hoisting you up onto all fours as he took his position behind you. He grasped his dick and ran his tip along your soaking heat before thrusting into you slowly. You groaned loudly, moving a hand back to his abdomen to slightly push him away.
“I can’t… I can’t anymore,” you moaned, feeling Negan take your hand to hold it behind your back.
“Mm, oh, you can, doll… You’re still wet,” he whispered into your ear. “I promise… I’ll go slow.”
You couldn’t argue. He felt too good for you to deny yourself the pleasure. Besides, if this was a one-time occurrence, you would jump out of your comfort zone in order to fulfill all of your fantasies.
Simon kneeled in front of you, running his thumb across your cheek. You looked up at him and noticed that his member was still erect. Both men were ready to release and so, you leaned forward to wrap your lips around Simon while Negan continued his slow thrusts.
“That feel good, doll?” Negan asked, looking up at you to see that your mouth was around Simon. “Oh, how rude of me… You’ve got a mouthful.”
Simon groaned, holding your hair back away from your face. He slowly thrusted into your mouth, urging you to take more of his length.
Negan held onto your hips, his own coming in contact with your own. He made sure to push into you until he couldn’t any further. He felt so deep and so good within your depths that you never wanted him to leave.
“All right, [Y/N]… Fuck, hold onto something tight. I’m about to fuck you until you can’t walk any longer,” Negan warned.
You pulled away from Simon to look over your shoulder at Negan. You licked your lips slowly and replied, “Mm, after three orgasms, I’m sure I’ll be bedridden for the next couple of days.”
Negan chuckled, “I think Simon and I are going to keep you, [Y/N].”
You grinned excitedly, “My body is yours.”
Simon growled, “Fuck yes, we are keeping you.”
Negan began his assault on your core with his hips slapping against yours rapidly. You moaned loudly, grasping onto the bedsheets once more before Simon slipped himself back into your mouth.
You could feel yourself slowly begin to reach your next orgasm, but you forced yourself to hold it. You needed to give these two men the release they needed. You began to bob your head against Simon as Negan continued to his rapid thrusts.
You pulled back and nodded towards Simon, allowing him to thrust into your mouth. After your permission, Simon began to thrust his hips into you. He kept in mind to not be too rough with you, but it was becoming increasingly difficult when he felt his release creep up along him.
“Oh shit, [Y/N]…” Simon muttered, feeling his tip repeatedly hit your throat. When he felt the sudden tightness contract around his tip, he pulled back just slightly and released into your mouth.
Negan watched which urged him to move faster. “Swallow,” he instructed.
Immediately, you obliged and pulled away from Simon to look at him with a smile. You moaned, feeling Negan’s length repeatedly move in and out of your depths.
“I – I was going to swallow anyway,” you argued.
Negan narrowed his eyes, slapping your backside with an opened hand. You gasped, the sudden sting causing your walls to tighten around his length abruptly. Negan growled, repeatedly slamming into you before he pulled out to release onto your lower back.
“Fuck,” he grunted, stroking himself a few more times before he sat back against the bed. Negan reached for your t-shirt and carefully wiped his release off your back before tossing the shirt back onto the floor.
You turned to lie down on your back, shutting your eyes and smiling to yourself. You felt like you could sleep forever after what just transpired.
“That was…” you mumbled.
“Good? Fuck yes, it was good. More than good, actually. It was fuckin’ great.” Negan finished.
Simon smirked, “We’re going to have to do that again.”
Negan nodded, “I agree. You belong to us now, doll.”
“I thought I already belonged to you, Negan.”
“You see, you’re going to make me fuckin’ hard again, [Y/N].”
You giggled, leaning over to kiss his cheek. “Well, I wouldn’t mind going another round,” you winked.
Simon grunted, “You’re going to be the death of us.”
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sawthingsiimagined · 7 years
Text
A New Me - 2
We Can’t Be Friends
JACE
It felt like old times. I was so happy. Here we are again at a Diner the night before I open for the musical sensation Miguel. It was reminiscent of the night I shared the first time I met my crew the night before our first show with the superstar pop group SASSY. This time I knew most of the crew and over the last 2 days had grown to enjoy the new additions. I was both nervous and excited about opening for Miguel. I had grown to love his music a couple of years back and won’t lie, his music made me think sexual thoughts. I was anxious to see him perform his music live and prayed that my set was impressive to the fans since I would be the first act they would experience the night of his show. Talking to my grandad, the Bishop, and my parents back home reassured me that things would be fine. They informed me that they wouldn’t be able to attend the first show, as they did when Jada and I performed our first show on the SASSY tour but the assured me they would attend a show soon. I understood because Jada was currently dealing with her pregnancy news and grandpa was still recovering from his heart attack. 
The seating chart at the table reminded me so much of the night I joined my crew at the diner and had my first drink, as well as first drunken night. I didn’t plan to get as drunk as I did that time but I was definitely planning on celebrating. My music was great, the show was going to be great, I felt great and I looked great. I was growing more confident being alone on the road without my sister. This solo gig may just work in my favor. I was wearing some grey-washed, skinny jean shorts with an oversized marble colored tank top and some white Yeezy Boosts. I had cut the sides of my hair and let the top grow back out longer than my previous haircut. My hair was in a slick man-bun and I was definitely feeling myself. Beside me was TJ, my bro who was currently drunk and talking loud as ever, on the other side of me was my new assistant Ashley, Mona’s niece who was a gorgeous girl with squinty eyes, soft copper skin tone and a stylish short hairstyle. She was a little tomboyish but in a very chic way that accented her shape and feminine features. Also at the table was my new stylist, Bryson a very attractive guy with a weird sense of fashion. He had about 6 piercings and tattoos along his neck and the sleeve of his arm. He was Dominican and bilingual, rocking a goatee with a mustache that complimented his full pink lips and slick bald head that made him look like a trendsetter. I was excited to learn a lot from him about being myself and embracing who I really was. The band also came to dine with me and across from me was...him. Demarion really knocked the wind out of me in ways I couldn’t prepare for me. A part of me wishes I would have suggested more ladies be a part of the crew. All of these males working for me really played with my imagination especially since they behaved as if they were indebted to me. Still, no one mattered on this crew like Demarion did. He was wearing a vintage, navy Atlanta Braves baseball jersey which he left the top four buttons unbuttoned to expose his chest and top set of abs. He also was wearing a fitted cap that covered his eyes, although I could still see them. We made a lot of eye contact sitting at the table. He had grown a beard since we started rehearsing for the new tour. It was something about the jet black color of the hair on his face that contrasted against his chocolate colored skin that made me want to risk it all. At this point, I had admitted that I was VERY attracted to him. I still hadn’t identified with gay, bi or curious. I wasn’t quite aware what each label meant and didn’t want to disrespect either group until I gained proper knowledge. As far as I was concerned I didn’t need a label to tell me that I wanted him. After 2 shots and 2 rounds of 1800 Tequila and pineapple juice, I felt I not only wanted him but I needed him. 
We finished our meals and I paid everyone’s tab thanking them for all of the hard work that I trusted that would deliver for the tour. Everyone jumped in the Mercedes Sprinter that was loaned to us by Miguel so we could all travel together around the city. No sooner as we pulled away from the diner everyone dozed off. The alcohol was definitely was working on us. I fought hard to stay awake. Demarion sat in front of me I noticed that he was still awake so I shot him a text message. I changed my name in his phone so no one would know who he was texting if they happened to see his phone. My name his phone was Dream. His name in my phone was an emoji of the snare drum. 
MY TEXT : “My room or yours? I don’t want to sleep alone tonight. I’m anxious”
I saw him jump as he felt his phone vibrate. It was so cute to see him speedily reply after he knew it was me. 
DEMARION’S TEXT: “I’ll come to your room. I didn’t clean up haha”
It’s funny that we text ‘lol’ and ‘haha’ and don’t be laughing. I didn’t even see him laugh but I understood. He lived out of suitcase and usually had clothing items thrown all over his hotel room. 
MY TEXT: “Thanks my friend”
I noticed he titled his head to the side and stared into space. I checked my message to see if I said something wrong. I didn’t see an error. 
The sprinter pulled into the hotel and once parked everyone immediately piled out, Demarion leading the way. Before I could step out the door closed in front of me also slamming on my leg. I looked through the window and saw Demarion talking to Walter, our driver/audio guy. I tried to open the door but it was locked. I was about to get annoyed because I figured they forgot about me and I just bought all of them food. I was too drunk for the shenanigans. I suddenly noticed Demarion hopping in the front seat and cranking up the ignition. 
“Um.. excuse me. Where are we going?” I said with a confused attitude. 
He looked at me through the rearview mirror with a serious face. 
“I want to take my Friend somewhere is that cool,” he replied with a flat tone. 
“Man I didn’t mean anything by that,” I said noticing that’s what offended him about my text. I sat back in my seat and he pulled into traffic. We road in silence for about 15 minutes until we pulled into the loading dock of the auditorium where we’d be performing tomorrow. I was confused. The place was a ghost town. The trucks that carried our tour gear were parked outside but everyone had retreated to the hotel for the night. Demarion parked and jumped out the car. I sat up waiting to see what he was about to do. He opened the back door and climbed inside.
“Scoot over,” he said. 
Without putting up a fuss I obliged but I’d be the one with the next demand. 
“What are we doing. I thought we were going to go to bed in my room. No one..,” I said before he broke my next statement with a kiss. He thrust his tongue into my mouth. He slightly broke the kiss and begin talking to me in begin kisses. 
“You were right. A pretty boy like you has probably had experiences kissing your friends. That’s all we’ve done is share a kiss. But I don’t want to be your friend. I want to be your man. So I wanted to show you the difference real quick. If you let me,” he said in a low whisper tone. It felt like we were in a movie. I was speechless. I could still taste the alcohol on his breath. He had been drinking Hennesy but Demarion never seemed to be drunk so I knew he wasn’t in this moment. He was fully functioning. 
I reached in and kissed him deeply. As if he didn’t like it, he pushed me on my back causing me to lay on the seat. He lifted my legs and reached for the button and zipper of my shorts. 
OMG! I was not ready for this. I’m not going to lie, I wanted him but I was a virgin and I’ve never expressed that to him. I had never been with a guy or girl but I knew what sex with both parties entailed. I was not ready. However, for some reason, I couldn’t put up much of a fight. I let him pull down my shorts followed by navy blue H&M boxer briefs. He reached down and kissed me. 
“Demarion,” I said with my hands on his chest, “I’ve never done this before.”
“So. Neither have I. But I want to with you. Bad,” he said with an evil grin that lit my insides on fire. I don’t know how to do anything but I was going to figure it out. 
He began kissing me on my neck and lifted my tank making a trail with his tongue down to my belly button. I squirmed trying not to make any noises. In all of my years, I had never been touched like this. My private area was hard as a brick. I had never been harder. Before I knew it, he grabbed my thighs from underneath, pulling my knees apart. He lifted my legs high and I clenched my eyes shut to prepare for what I expected to be painful. However, I remembered he still had his jeans on. Next thing I knew he buried his head in between my legs using his tongue to spread my cheeks apart. Afterward, I completely understood what Jhene Aiko meant when she said: “eat the booty like groceries”. At this point, I could no longer hold in my moan. I breathed heavy and let out a moan. That made him go crazy. He started using his tongue faster. I grabbed my privacy to keep it from hitting him on the top of his head. I could no longer feel my toes. He slapped my hands down so they would fall beside me. Without letting up, he started stroking my manhood, slowly and I knew then that I wouldn’t survive the night. No one had EVER touched that area besides me and my mom when she changed my diaper as a baby. I breathed harder and harder trying to contain myself. I felt myself about to climax but I tried to avoid it so I wouldn’t spill my liquid on him. That would be weird. He made the mistake by talking.
“Your friends do this shit to you? Huh? ” he asked him between strokes of his tongue and hand. 
I tried to answer but words wouldn’t leave my throat. 
“So you gonna let me be your man Jace? You gonna let a nigga be your man baby?” he asked a little more aggressive and louder than the last question. 
I managed to find words. “Yea MAN!” I screamed. Before I knew it I climaxed, shooting my load onto the top of his Nike fitted cap and on his hand. I immediately felt embarrassed I had never climaxed so hard. I start shaking involuntarily and he pulled up and leaned down burying his face in my neck while I grabbed on to him. 
“You like that? I ain’t your friend. I’m your man. You got that?” he asked.
Exasperated I answered “Yes.”
He laid on top of me for a few minutes and I felt tears swell in my eye. What did this mean? My heart was beating fast and all I wanted to do was lay here all night. I knew that we would have to leave but I felt something deep for this guy. What should I do? We sat at the arena another hour and he told me how infatuated he was with me and how he wanted to protect me and be the man of my dreams. Only thing is that I never really dreamed of a man but I told him we could attempt to try this together. He would be my first. My first sexual encounter, first boyfriend and possibly first love. I was terrified.
“Oh and I’m sorry for cursing. I know you don’t like that. But just had to let you know I ain’t your lil’ friend,” he said. We both burst into laughter. 
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We Can’t Be Friends
JADA
It was rather ironic that I was sitting at the airport gate waiting for my flight to board and listening to Adele belt her hit song “Hello”. I was headed to surprise Jace for his first show. I told him that wouldn’t be able to make it because of pregnancy issues but I really wanted to be there for my brother. Besides, the only pregnancy issue I was having is that I didn’t know who the baby’s daddy was. I texted Ernest earlier that day and he agreed to meet me back in Augusta at the end of the week. He seemed to be rather calm about the whole ordeal which caught me off guard because he never expressed interest in me besides my legs being wrapped around his waist. 
I watched the people deboard the plane that I was about to get on. Luckily the flight was not delayed. I caught Spirit flight for cheap and every knows Spirit is notorious for cancellations and delays. I had just realized that I had Adele’s song on repeat when I heard her sing the intro to  “Hello” for the third time. It was at that moment that I noticed him. Q walked off the plane. My heart fell to my feet. He didn’t notice me. I really wasn’t 100% sure that it was him but I gathered my things to get a closer look. He was wearing a gray bomber jacket with gray joggers. He looked rather normal. His sunglasses gave me the impression that he was incognito and I didn’t see anyone with him. I started to second guess myself even more as I followed him closely a few feet away from the gate. I was a silly hoe but not a stupid hoe. I know who I gapped these legs open for. I may don't know his mom’s name but I knew what he looked like. 
I decided to tap him on the shoulder when I was a few inches away from him. Startled he turned around with a frown on his face. It quickly softens when he recognized me. 
“Jada!” he said loudly as if he had seen a ghost. He grabbed my hands and I pulled away. He could tell I was upset.
“Let me explain,” he said.
“You have 5 minutes because my plane is leaving,” I said with my hand on my hip and the neck roll of every woman on Love and Hip Hop when they do their confessional interviews. 
“I’ve been calling you. I told Jace to let you know,” he said. 
“You what? Wait. You talked to Jace?” I asked. 
“Yes briefly. Look do you trust me?” he asked. 
“HELL NO NIGGA! HELL YOU MEAN?” I shrieked. I was almost embarrassed at my reaction but this boy almost had me killed and then went ghost on me and now I may be pregnant with his baby. What is trust? 
“Look come with me. Where are you going? I can get you another flight,” he pleaded. I could tell by his eyes that he was desperate. I looked back at my gate watching passengers board and without thinking it through I waved my hand in the direction he was headed to signal that I would go with him. I take it back. I am a stupid hoe. 
We go to the pickup area and I notice one of his crew members standing outside of a black truck. We both get inside. Once we were inside he reached over and hugged me and I begin hitting at him. Tears filled my eyes. He grabbed my hands. 
“Baby! I’m sorry,” he said. “There is so much that happened. There’s so much I didn’t want to introduce you to so fast dealing with me. Look I’m not these other rap niggas out here. I’m street. Real street. So you have to understand, these clothes, my jewelry, and these cars.... that’s the most glamorous shit about me,” he said looking me directly in my eye. 
I started bawling and laid my head in his lap. “I was so worried Q. I didn’t know what to do,” I said in between sobs. 
“To the W,” he said to the driver.
“I know baby. I’m gonna make it up to you. I swear,” he said running his fingers through my hair.
We rode the rest of the way to the hotel in silence. I had driven my car to Atlanta to catch a flight from here to meet up with my brother. Q was the last person I expected to see. Luckily the show wasn’t until tomorrow night so it was possible that I could still make it to support him. 
Once we got to the hotel we went immediately to his room. When we walked in Q went straight the bathroom shutting the door behind him. I sat on the bed and contemplated how I was going to tell him that I was possibly carrying his baby. After a few minutes I heard the shower turn on. ‘This nigga didn’t even say give me a few minutes or nothing’ I thought to myself. A few more minutes went by and I heard him call my name. I called back but he didn’t say anything. I walked to the bathroom door and opened it. He was standing in the middle of the bathroom naked with steam floating around him like he was in some kinky music video. A part of me was turned on and a part of me wanted to slap him for thinking he could whip out the dick and all would be forgotten. But I had something in store for him. 
I looked at him and rolled my eyes.
“Come shower with me. I just got out of jail and hopped on the first flight leaving for Atlanta. I came here to hide for a few days until the press dies down. A nigga feels dirty. Come help me get clean,” he said grabbing his leg....and by leg I mean the tree trunk of a dick between his legs. I felt my nipples harden and my garden moisten. I took off my clothes and proceeded to join him in the shower. 
“Q you know I was almost killed messing around with you?” I asked sincerely. 
“Yes, I know. And they were looking for you after the fact as well to try and get back at me. But I got you. Ok?” he said. I scoffed. 
“I said OK?” he repeated himself.
“I’m not a damn child,” I said pushing away from him. 
“You’re not a child. Because if you were I wouldn’t be able to do this,” he said reaching from behind me palming one of my breasts and using another hand to find the gateway to heaven between my legs. I was sold. “But you are my baby,” he said in my ear before taking it in his mouth. I let out a soft moan while he fingered me. The warm water running over my body stimulated me more. Before I could think further, he inserted himself inside of me from behind. It had been a while since I had sex so it hurt in a pleasureable way. He enjoyed how tigh I was becuase I could hear him trying to surpress his moans. He picked up my right leg to help balance himself and to give me the death stroke. I literally felt like my soul was leaving my body. If it was possible he would possibly get me pregant again tonight.
I thought about how much I wanted to understand him and how I really would rather him be the father of my child more than Ernest. Before I knew if he grabbed my hair and begin growling. I knew he had climaxed. For the first time having sex with him I did not. My mind must have been elsewhere. I pullled away from him and used a towel to lather soap and begin washing our bodies. He kissed me in between wipes and told me that I was his Queen and shit. He also excused himself for climaxing so fast. Something about him not jerking off because he had been in jail and the sight of me made him horny. Eye roll. 
I decided to wait until the morning to tell him the news. It was already late so I knew that there were no more departing flights but I was for sure getting on a plane to see my brother at Q’s expense. He flew out on me, I’m going to fly out on him. 
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