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its-your-mind · 3 days

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I’m sorry I need to talk about this for a second

This part right here. When Nirvana tries to use Thought Infection on Kim Dokja. And this ability that absolutely neutralized Yoo Joonghyuk, Min Jiwon, and Yoo Sangah…

just…

bounces right off.

and it’s set up like this big badass moment. Kim Dokja saves the day again. Kim Dokja can face down anyone. He’s more powerful than every other incarnation and constellation, no matter how much foreknowledge they have.

But honestly?

It kinda just makes me sad.

yjh is incapacitated by the Eternal Nightmare ability because of all the awful things he’s seen and experienced, yes.

But as we know from 1863, happy memories can be much more debilitating for him than sad ones. And while he’s only got 1-2’s memories right know, we know that 2 had some incredibly happy memories to pass on, memories that make the losses that much harder to take.

And Min Jiwon?

Of course she doesn’t actually want to visit a spa while her friends and troops are dying. But can you blame her for having some deep craving for comfort and relaxation right now?

But for Kim Dokja…

The Fourth Wall isn’t just protecting kdj from the negative effects of the skill. It’s not hiding his secret desires, or absorbing his emotions.

It is literally preventing him from experiencing the world around him as reality. Not just because it feels improbable or surreal, but because it is literally keeping him separate from the world around him. On a fundamental level, he does not believe he is truly present in this time and space.

This is derealization and dissociation on an unbelievably intense scale.

“If we’re just characters, why did you die for us so many times?”

Why wouldn’t he? He’s not here, not really. He’s just Reading this story, no matter how much sway he’s been having over what has happened. All of that is just his work as a Reader hoping to see the Epilogue of his favorite novel.

“It was a really great story, isn’t that right?”

Narratively satisfying. A twist ending. A fate that subverted expectations.

An Epilogue worth Reading. Not touching, not feeling, not joining, not creating. Just watching. From a distance away. From behind glass. Through the cracks in a wall.

After all, a story can’t exist without a writer, a protagonist, and a reader. Only two of them truly participate in creating the story. But when you’re the Reader, it’s always worth reading the story again. And again. And again. And again. And again ,

#orv #DONT MIND ME IM TOTALLY FINE OVER HERE #DONT WORRY ABOUT ME I JUST READ 73 DEMON KING AGAIN AND IM JUST #FINE #FUCK #orv spoilers #omniscient reader's viewpoint #omniscient reader webtoon #orv novel #orv novel spoilers #kim dokja #the fourth wall #hnnnngngnnggngngngn #do you like my comma I’m v proud of it

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lunarspiral1127 · 3 hours

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X-Men 97 episode 8 *SPOILERS*

Bastion

Not gonna lie, I busted out laughing when I watched his origin story. This is the second time an antagonist had to wait for a couple to make a child and use said child for their plans. Nimrod was lucky that the guy he infected was in a relationship. Plus, I thought it was gonna make Bastion sympathetic due to his childhood flashbacks, but nope.

So, he made a Utopia for humans, but the mutants are enslaved. Saw old Polaris and the Phoenix. But, what bugs me is that he claims that many of the humans consented to be turned into Prime Sentinels without knowing all the details and won't have any memory of being turned. I find it hard to believe that every single one of them would've consented, especially his elderly mother. Dude omitted many details and I'm pretty sure he turned some of them without them knowing. Plus, I'm still mad at him for killing Gambit.

Cameos of Dr. Doom and Zemo (hydra n@zi Zemo, not the MCU version). Wasn't expecting to see them being members of OZT.

Mr. Sinister's just in it for the mutant experimentation.....y'know what? I shouldn't be surprised with that reason why he "teamed up" with Bastion. More test subjects.

Summers Family

Not gonna lie, I was really annoyed with the drama between Cable and Scott. If this was comics Scott, I can understand why Cable's giving him the cold shoulder. But, this Scott didn't wanna abandon Nathan like his dad did to him! It was Madelyn that gave him to Bishop. So, if Scott was there with her, things would've been cool?! God, I'm so sick of this drama. Thank goodness that it didn't last long and that Jean stopped them from escalating it further.

Summers family vs. Prime Sentinels was pretty cool. I like that father/son fistbump, which means things will get better between the two.

It's funny that Jean's being the mom at Cable who's like this big man in his 50s.

Also, Jean and Scott's relationship is getting better which is a relief.

Nightcrawler

Once again, precious boy and MVP. What he said to Jean was really nice. He's always been there as someone's shoulder to lean and cry on. When he talked about Mystique, I felt so bad for him. Honestly, I hated what she did to him just because he was born that way. In the 90s show, she did feel guilt for what she did when Nightcrawler talked to her. But, I still didn't like her for what she did to him. However, with all the words and hugs he's given to others, I hope he has someone who'd give him words and hugs too. He also needs a shoulder to lean and cry on too.

SWASHBUCKLING NIGHTCRAWLER HELL YEAH!!! I've been waiting to see him use swords and it was worth the wait. Him teaming up with Wolverine was really cool. Plus, seeing how his teleporting works was cool too. Love that he was protecting his sister, and I'm glad that we got something with him and Logan cause we haven't had anything like that since he first appeared.

Beast

Why the hell would he let the reporter stay in?! Even if she's not doing her job, she's shouldn't be involved! It has nothing to do with her, plus, I'm pretty sure he revealed a lot of classified information that only the X-Men should be allowed to hear and see. Dammit, Beast. And, dammit Morph for letting her in too.

*sigh* Anyone else think, he's been done dirty in this episode? Cause having her stay in there got his butt kicked. Sure, he didn't know that she was a Prime Sentinel, but they do know the possibility that any human could be one, right? Now, Beast is knocked out along with Rogue, who hasn't woken up still.

Jubilee and Roberto

Okay, so they are gonna be part of the main plot, good. I was worried that they were gonna be sidelined, especially Jubilee.

His mom is a beech. She sold her son out to the Prime Sentinels and didn't believe him and for what? Her reputation?! Man, f**k this beech, she sucks. Poor Roberto though.

Finally using his powers more than once! I counted four times in this whole series so far of when he used them. It's also something that annoys me about the character. He said that he was training in the Danger Room to surprise Jubilee, but why couldn't we have seen that?! Why couldn't we have Roberto training with one of the X-Men's help and see him develop his abilities?! Hell, have Jubilee be there to train him! That way we could've seen more of his abilities and see him grow more and have him interact with other characters, bonding with them. Not just Jubilee. Maybe have him open up to when he first awakened his powers and why he wants to hide them, instead of just telling us.

On the plus side, they should be okay thanks to Magneto's magnetic EMP ability. Speaking of which....

Magneto

I'm glad he didn't get turned into a Prime Sentinel, but I still don't understand how Bastion and Mr. Sinister got his hands on him from Genosha. That blast should've killed him along with the Morlocks. I don't even think it's gonna be explained how they captured him.

His prisoner numbers....yeesh. 😬

The one good thing that Cooper did. Letting him go and realizing that he was right. Aside from that, f**k her. Seriously, was the only good human (regular human, not enhanced) shown in this was Moira?! Cause that's what it feels like.

Now, I was confused at first with what Magneto did, but I think he went to the North or South Poles and used the Earth's magnetic field which is strongest there to cause a worldwide blackout, disabling all the Prime Sentinels. Not killing them, mind you. All while in his underwear, too.

Honestly, I wouldn't blame him if he wages war. He tried to be good. He tried to respect Xavier's dream. But, look what happened. So, I wouldn't blame him if he did this.

HOWEVER! I like that Magneto was good. Part of me doesn't want him to go back to his old ways cause that's gonna be more conflict between him and Xavier. Plus, only Logan claimed that Magneto waged war. If he did, he would've killed the Prime Sentinels, but he didn't. If anything, he'd be waging war on Bastion since he's the one responsible. But, yeah, I'm sorry Xavier. You're cool and all, but Magneto was right.

Cameos

I mentioned Zemo, Doctor Doom, Future Polaris and Future Phoenix. But there were much more.

Omega Red and the Silver Samurai, but one that made me so excited to see......SPIDER-MAN!!! I was so happy to see 90s Spider-Man. I know many would want a sequel to the animated series, but we'll have to wait and see.

The rest I wanna talk/rant about

Professor X shows up finally, but I got miffed when he said "I hope I'm not too late". CHARLES! YOU ARE VERY VERY LATE!!! I know space travel takes time, but COME ON! He better do something real quick to help stop all this crap that's been happening. Dunno how, but it better be something good.

By the way, I'm still annoyed with that black hole excuse. Why couldn't he just contact Scott and the others and stay in touch with them right when he was fully recovered or was well enough?

WHERE THE HELL IS STORM?!?!?! I know she's with Forge, but you'd think the moment she heard about Genosha, she'd head back home flying. She'll probably show up next week, but it's been like two episodes since she got her powers back. Is her not being there sooner a choice the writers made cause if she was there, the fight with the Prime Sentinels would've been over quicker? *sigh* I just wanna see one of my favorites come back and kick some butt like she used too.

I dunno if Forge is gonna come back with Storm, but I hope he does. I want him to help with this Bastion mess. Plus, he did take a photo with him, which has me worried that he was connected somehow but I hope not. It also would be cool, if he contacted the rest of X-Factor and meet up with the X-Men and team up. But, I don't think that's gonna happen.

So, Bishop is definitely out of the picture for the rest of this season, which is bullcrap. It would've been cool to have him and Cable work together again like before along with the X-Men. But, instead, the excuse was they got separated from the time stream. So, we don't even know if he's okay or if he's lost again, or if he actually made it back home. God, I feel like his character's purpose of the show was to help create another characters origin.

Okay, I think that's pretty much it. It was a good episode, even though I did rant on a lot of stuff. We'll see how parts 2 and 3 play out in the next two weeks and hope that the finale will stick the landing.

#x men 97 #xmen 97 #x-men 97 #xmen 97 spoilers #x men 97 spoilers #x-men 97 spoilers #episode 8 #episode eight #marvel

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pseudosis · 18 hours

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Baby daddy!ZUKO who’s just as nasty as you recalled him being. The unashamed debauchery, it’s some infectious disease that’s just ridden in the way he fucks. He’ll fold you up, bend you over, get that pretty mouth of yours to cough up his name in ways you never could bring your mind to wrap around.

Fighting against his aura, something that’s so wrapped up and put away to a stranger’s eye, yet still so weirdly magnetic proved to only allow room for that infection to overwhelm your sense of rationality. To put up a wall is to only prompt it to ruthlessly beat it down until it turned to a dust.

It’s the very thing that landed you up pregnant the first time, a daughter, that looks just fucking like him. You loved her as much as your heart could muster, and you loved him as well. Though that love came to a halfway point and diminished on his end as if that night wasn’t enough for his feelings to bubble up at the thought of you alone.

As a father, he’s everything a daughter could ask for. He spoils her until her teeth go all rotten, attends all of her school events to cheer her on, talks to her whenever things get down to complication. Perfect wasn’t a word good enough to cut his role as a parent.

But when he’s at the doorstep, dropping her off back to you after having a day out together, that aura comes back ghosting your thoughts once more. Putting her to bed as she had school tomorrow, you’re so caught up in being a mom, you become so aware about how much more taller he is than you for the first time in a long time.

How his scent of rather pronounced cologne just wafts and plays around in your nostrils, call it taunting if you will. How the callousness of his hands make for this erratic display of the work he puts in just about everyday to keep up with the body he personally sculpted.

“Here’s the child support money, I gave you a little extra in there in case the normal amount doesn’t cut it. If not, buy yourself something nice I guess.”

Traveling your gaze downward to meet the sight of a bulging envelope held out to you in those same hands you were just thinking on the details about, you take it. Feeling the pull of tiredness at last catching up with the weight of your eyelids, a thought hits you, recollecting the plans of driving off to the local pharmacy to pick up your migraine medication.

Surprisingly, he had the courtesy, buried away deep inside of his conscience, of offering you a drive there since you wanted to cut back on using up your own gas that helped push you off to work. His figure resting on the doorframe, almost looking down at you like he honestly didn’t want to spare his time to satisfy your needs. It irked you, that’s just apart of his personality that honestly pushes you away and reminds you to stay closed off to him.

No began on the tip of your tongue, though it ended up falling flat and lost amidst the sea of thoughts flowing mentally. Seeing the dead center of those amber eyes just fixated unmistakably upon your own caused for acceptance to finally cross your main line of thinking.

Acceptance had an odd way of taking its course, once yes rolled off your tongue for the first at the door, another wildly different kind of yes ended in you being folded upwards in the back of his car. Both of you, equally as naked as the other, the situation being his biceps curling begrudgingly into the soft flesh of your thighs while he lodged his dick back and forth to force apart those pretty lips.

Oh he’s so gross in the way he’s sliding his tongue down the opening of your ear, taking his hips and throwing them upwards to get that messy slick of yours to drip down the point of no return, down his balls and eventually falling to the car carpet. Feeling heat spread from the back of your head down to the tips of your toes as you took him abusing his way through your once closed up walls. The tip of his dick eating out the certain area in your guts that scratches an itch so satisfying, you threw your head back to scream to the top of the car.

Something in the way he just huffs and puffs out that heat through his nose and mouth that press wet spots flush on your skin. Or how he’s grinding out the scalding lust running in his body around in your pussy as a way to make you taste the high of his own unashamed passion. Cunt riding out the bouts of you squirting out some of that heat he’s implementing into you.

“‘M glad no one’s had this pussy since we split doll. You can’t bring yourself to think about any other dick huh?”

Hands snaking themselves through that head of hair of his, you brought your fingernails to dig in deep and tug firmly on any strands caught in your grasp. You felt his dick twitch in between your walls at the pleasing sting that coursed over his nerves. The biggest fuck you silently mustered. If that even counted, he seemingly liked it.

“I’ll take that as a yes...”

#wrote this WEEKS ago.#im kinda having mixed feelings about it but take it. <3 #avatar the last airbender #atla zuko #fire lord zuko #zuko smut #avatar zuko #zuko x reader #zuko fanfic #zuko imagine #zuko x you #zuko x y/n #adult zuko #{✩*ೃ.⋆𝐩𝐬𝐞𝐮𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 🎀}

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newtonsheffield · 23 hours

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Princess Edwina really out there driving a sexy sports car with her hot girlfriend in the passenger seat. She’s giving BDE

Princess Edwina, is the party princess of the people, honestly.

She’s beautiful, obviously, and she loves pretty dresses and nice shoes and she has tattoos dotted over her arms and thankfully Kate was able to intervene before Edwina got “Come Here” tattooed on her thigh once but really what she has is confidence.

She really swooped back into Josie’s life and made her question everything she’s ever thought about her sexuality and it surprised her for a lot of reasons but partly because she didn’t actually think she was that girl.

She didn’t think she’d have her stomach drop when she sees Edwina slide out of a bright red car and wink at her while she hands her keys and her bloody sunglasses even, off to somebody else. And sure, it might be because Edwina made her dog a jumper but it’s a little bit because Edwina at the wheel of that car is an image.

She kind of likes the way the engine feels when she’s sitting in the passenger seat and the slightly wild smile on Edwina’s face as she shifts through the gears far too fast. She also kind of hates that a lot of other women look at her new girlfriend exactly the same way she does.

“How many phone numbers did you just get?”

Edwina chuckled as the door closed behind her and the engine revved while the crowd they’d just walked through screamed.

“I dunno, I gave them to Sophie to get rid of.”

“I’m sure she’s thrilled.” Josie sighed as the tyres squealed against the road.

Edwina shrugged sighing, “It’s the car, Adrienne vibrates the knickers off girls.”

Josie scoffed, “And just how many hook ups has Adrienne been witness to?”

She looked a little guilty, and Josie tutted, “Well, guess who won’t be taking my knickers off in here then.”

Edwina gasped, “But! What?! No!”

“I am not getting a yeast infection for you.”

“Adrienne’s very clean, thank you!”

But of course, a few weeks later when Edwina arrives at her door she’s sitting on the hood of a blue car instead.

“What do you think?”

Josie raised her eyebrows, “You painted Adrienne blue instead of red?”

“You’re so pretty,” Edwina sighed, “But seriously, Adrienne is Rosso Corsa, thank you. She’s not Red . And this is Eva.”

Josie paused. “And Eva is… blue?”

“She’s Azzurro la-“ Edwina cut herself off, “You know what, no. No. Yes, she’s blue but also you are the only other woman who’s ever been in this car.”

She was trying to make Josie more comfortable, she knew that, and it probably shouldn’t have been as sweet as it was. Edwina, buying an entirely new car just so she wouldn’t always think of it when they were in it.

“You know the chances of me taking my knickers off for you in a sports car are still very very low right?”

Edwina rolled her eyes, leaning forward to kiss her gently, “Don’t be hasty. You haven’t even felt how soft her seats are.”

And damnit josie had absolutely no idea how she ended up here, but the leather was very soft against her skin when her underwear were hanging off the rear view mirror later.

#head on the pillow au #edwina x josie #molly’s asks and answers

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sysig · 3 months

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Ah, childhood memories (Patreon)

#Doodles #UT #Handplates #Sans #Gaster #Having such clear external-view memories of what happened when they were young would probably give Sans a lot of ammunition lol #Not that they'd know any different - their poor memories honestly :( - but having such clear memories in places would have to be weird #Most people have childhood amnesia to an extent! Tho it's hard to say when that would've applied to them anyway with their sped-up growth #Not to mention the trauma #And it's possible that doesn't apply to Monsters to begin with lol - but it's all a moot point anyway since these are their only memories!#It's sad to think of how much of themselves are missing forever since Gaster didn't experience them :(#This is what happens when you get behind on your work >:0 #I really wonder what their lack of memories/restoration of memories would do for their like/dislike of certain things!#Like how Papyrus says that sitting with Sans in his lap makes a lot of sense as to why it was so familiar and comforting #But also that knowing makes it sad as well :( Knowing recolours their understanding and interpretation!#Knowing Why makes things make sense but does it actually Help? It's a tough question - certainly it hurts in the moment #The little things Gaster has infected for them and for himself ♥ Like taking notes! Like chess and sweets and spaghetti and lab coats #And dark sweaters and cigarette smoke and hugs and intelligence - how many pieces of all of them have A Feeling attached #How many more have A Memory - and even more than that A Memory Lost and unrecoverable ughhh ♥#But the little things they can hold on to hehe <3 Like pinging Gaster for what they all know and remember #Why does he even keep coming over if he knows the reception he'll get? Lol #Feels particularly self-loathing and goes to get bullied as penance pfft

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we-were-so-beautiful · 4 months

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4. shower

wow look it's another chapter!!! like... not that long after the last one, even! honestly I had the first 3 sections of this basically entirely written not long after finishing the last one, but eventually I decided I should probably do literally anything else for a while (hyperfocus is a real dick lol), and so I'm just now getting back to it. I thought this was gonna be on the shorter side, but it's about the same as the last one, around 1.3k! there's a pretty important reveal in this one...

Content warnings for this chapter: box boy universe, pet whump, dehumanization, conditioning, infected wounds, (severe) illness. As always, please let me know if there's anything else I need to tag.

[masterlist] [chapter three]

Vanessa’s never been particularly sensitive to scents—it’s a saving grace, in a mind where too much light or sound or texture can make her feel like she’s dying. But by the time the guy lying shaking on the seats behind her practically falls out of the taxi in front of her stoop, even she’s having a hard time with the smell coming off of him. Given how the driver peels away with all his windows down the second she pulls the last scrap of soiled newspaper from his backseat, it probably isn’t just her.

She turns back to the guy, for the first time finally alone with him. She’s too short to be used to talking down to people, but he’s hunched himself into that weird curled-up position again, so when she speaks it's aimed vaguely toward the top of his head. “Okay. First things first, we’re getting your ass in the shower,” she tells him. “And then we can deal with the effects of my questionable life decisions.” She pauses for a moment, considers. “Well. This one, anyway.”

There’s no way she’s getting him in through the front like this. Too many stairs, and too much dirt. The garden door will have to cut it. She motions for him to follow her down the alley, and he unfurls himself just enough to shuffle after her.

As soon as the shadows close in around them, she looks back over her shoulder. When she’s satisfied that no one can see them, she unclasps the collar from around his neck and tosses it, leash and all, into the garbage.

—

Vanessa can’t say she’s ever been grateful for the fact that her parents are insane enough to have a swimming pool in the basement of their New York fucking brownstone. Quite frankly, she still isn’t; they got the fucker installed when she was a kid and she screamed for so many days they finally packed her off to a hotel with her nanny of the week just to shut her up. Which they probably should have done in the first place, given that she was nine and there was a jackhammer in her fucking basement.

What she is grateful for now, though, is that the part of this floor that isn’t taken up by the pool—or the hot tub, or the weirdly redundant multi-person bathtub—is a shower stall the size of her literal bedroom. Complete with benches, and removable showerheads, and, she’s hoping, everything else she could possibly need right now.

“In here,” she motions, and he drags himself onto the tiles. “I’d offer you the weirdly redundant multi-person bathtub, but you’ve barely been able to keep your head up all day and the last thing I need is to fucking drown a guy in my basement. Also no offense but you’re literally so dirty right now I’d have to drain the fucker the second you got in. After this you can have a bath whenever you want, if you’re into that sorta thing, but for right now you’re getting a damn rinse.”

—

Once he’s more or less situated on the built-in shower bench, propped up in the corner in hopes it’ll keep him from falling ass over, Vanessa gets to work, still fully clothed down to her chucks on the marble tile. She unhooks a showerhead and aims it at the drain while it warms up. “Is this okay?” she asks, pointing it at his feet, and he flinches sluggishly but doesn’t respond either way.

“I don’t know what that means, guy.” She tests the water again with her hand. “It can’t be that bad, can it?” she muses out loud. “It’s the same temperature I’d use for me, and fuck knows I’m… y’know, picky. So if you want it different you gotta tell me, okay.”

He doesn’t tell her shit. But he doesn’t flinch too much harder when she moves the stream of water up toward his knees, either, and she figures that’s the best she’s gonna get.

She leans over him and focuses the showerhead on his hair. It’s matted stiff as tree bark, the water barely able to permeate through the layers of filth. “Shit, I dunno man, your hair’s got so much crap in it. Not to mention it wouldn’t surprise me if that shelter gave you goddamn lice.” She shudders. “Might be better off just cutting it short.”

There’s a noise she barely registers as a gasp before his ice-pale eyes fly open and he clutches her arm, quicker than she’s seen him move by fucking light years. She jerks automatically out of his grip, dropping the showerhead in her alarm, but he fixes her with a lidless, panicky stare and the eye contact is so startling she’s frozen to the spot. “Please…” he wheezes, “don’t.”

“You fuckin’ what, dude?”

“Don’t… cut… my hair.”

She blinks, astonished. “That’s the first thing you’ve said all fucking day, isn’t it?” He doesn’t offer another. “Christ. Typical fuckin’ me not to notice.” She huffs quietly. “Well shit, dude, I guess if you give enough of a fuck to speak up about it it can stay. But so help me if I find a single fucking nit in there.”

He whimpers quietly, squeezing his eyes shut, but he doesn’t say another word.

—

Vanessa gingerly retrieves the showerhead from where it’s spattering up at the ceiling, along with an oversized lace bath pouf and a mostly-full bottle of body wash she’s pretty sure is fucking designer. If you could see me now, Mom, she thinks, squirting the gel at his left shoulder, the one closest to her. You… well, you probably still wouldn’t give a shit.

She touches the pouf to his sullied skin as gently as she can, and she knows she’s not well-coordinated at the best of times but she really doesn’t feel like she deserves the choked-off sound he makes or the way he shrinks away from her when she makes contact. “Oh cmon, guy, look I know but you gotta let me get this shit off you, there’s no way it’s not fucking your shit up worse than it already is,” she cajoles, and whatever she’s said it makes something in his posture go slack and he rolls back toward her, opening himself to her touch. “Thanks, uh, I think,” she hedges, and begins to lather him up with slow, concentrative strokes. She flicks the shower back on, sluicing suds and dirt from his skin in equal measure.

"Ohhh, fucking yiiiiikes," Vanessa says softly.

With the first layer of filth washed away, Vanessa can see the far grimmer reality that’s been hidden underneath. Rows of jagged, infected gashes streak their way across his shoulder to his chest. The skin around them burns an angry red, the wounds themselves all but smothered in sickly whitish-yellow. What narrow swathes of skin remain intact are mottled purple, and now that she’s touching him, she can tell he’s just… way too much hotter than any person should ever be.

She lowers the temperature of the water and keeps washing him, afraid to look but needing to see. Each stroke only reveals more of the same. His chest and left shoulder seem to have gotten most of the worst of it, but there are stripes across his arm, his back, his stomach, deep gouges in his legs. She hasn’t tried to touch his face yet, but now that she knows what to look for she thinks she can even see a scratch or several across his cheek, trailing up into his hairline. Jesus fuck.

It all makes a sinister sort of sense now, she thinks: the shallow breathing, the shivers, the near-total lack of response. And here she thought he just had regular rescuee trauma.

“Fuck,” she breathes out quietly, as the realization creeps over her like ice.

There’s something really, really wrong with this guy.

taglist: @maracujatangerine @pigeonwhumps @tragedyinblue @marchtothefuckingsea @octopus-reactivated @briars7

#whump #pet whump #rescue whump #recovery whump #bbu #box boy universe #vanessa + juniper #disaster caretaker #imperfectly consistent #tw dehumanization #tw conditioning #tw illness #tw injury #tw infection #do I like... need to tag for language?#I know using swears is pretty standard for bbu/pet whump stories #but I also use them kind of a uh. non standard amount.#I kinda feel like vanessa's house needs a tw of its own lmao #I honestly have fun making up all the increasingly ridiculous rich person shit #anyway I've got a decent bit of the next chapter written already (wrote it at some point back when I was working on 2 or 3 tbh)#and that's more or less it for stuff I have fully written out in advance #(from the main storyline at least)#but a lot of the stuff that follows that is stuff I've had in my head for ages #so hopefully it won't be too hard to write out! knock on wood #sometimes the things you think about that much come easily when you finally write them #and sometimes they're nigh on impossible bc you get obsessive with doing them justice #or at least just like. remembering all the ideas you've ever had for them when you finally sit down to write #hello it's me writing a novel in the tags again #anyway I've been falling asleep since somewhere in the middle of proofreading so I should probably wrap this up lol #if you read all this for some reason hi!

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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 4 months

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PRINCE!GOJO X KNIGHT!READER MY BELOVED i just thought about another thing and i need to get it out - i like to think out knights are connected ok. hear me out maybe my knight is just another version of yours - meaning if my knight had met satoru at a young age, they would've turned into your knight DOES THAT MAKE SENSE your knight is a bit more soft (still a warrior though!!!) while mine isn't as soft as they'd like to be and that's just because one grew up in a castle with the prince taking care of them and the other grew up having to fend for themselves they're all just sooooooooooooooo ahhhh i can't i keep thinking about your knight too like they all actually made a cozy little home in my head i love them so much

and i think your lovely "i think i was born to meet you." applies for my little prince and his little knight too:(((((((((((

- @softgirlgonehaywire

MICKEY I KNOW I SAY THIS EVERY DAY BUT WE RLLY ARE CONNECTED i was literally thinking abt this while answering that ask…. the differences between our knights…. AND UR SOSO RIGHT thats literally perfect. its canon to our lore now.

it makes sm sense too bc the reason why my knight!reader is so devoted to prince!gojo is bc he saved them!! and i think that also leads them to have a kind of hero complex where they want to return the favor, or save others the way he saved them… but to your knight satoru is just a silly little spoiled prince that theyve never met before, so why would they like him??

ok but now im just thinking abt our knights meeting each other…::: ur knight coming face to face w a version of them that isnt as hardened, that was saved and got to live a more peaceful life….. the envy and maybe contempt? or maybe just apathy. idk but i am THINKING

AND AND AND…….. ok but what if our princes met the other version of their knight 😵‍💫😵‍💫 HEAR ME OUT HEAR ME OUTTT

just…. ur prince!gojo meeting a knight!reader who is soso loyal and smitten w him (he would cry and explode i think)….. and my prince!gojo meeting a knight!reader who lost their smile (WHO HE FAILED TO SAVE oh i think that would just break him)…… my knight being so indulgent and ur satoru taking full advantage of it, ur knight getting hissy when my gojo acts overprotective…… HHHHH IM LOSING IT MICKEY CAN U FEEL IT……..

anyways in my head theyre one big found family who take care of each other <333 love & peace on planet earth etc etc. they were meant to meet each other one way or another!!!

#THE ARI/MICKEY KNIGHT&PRINCE MULTIVERSE GOES CRAZY #i also think its so funny how one side is just fluff bc sweet lil prince!gojo gets a knight who loves him back #while the other side is just gut-churning soul-shattering Angst LOL #but tbh i think ur prince would miss having a knight who will just beat the shit out of him #and my prince would literally throw up out of guilt if he learned abt the pain ur knight went thru LMAO (there are tears in my eyes.)#THE INTERACTIONS FLOODING MY BRAIN RN…. mickey u keep infecting me more and more pls stop i cant take it 💔💔#ok but im also soso curious to learn more abt ur little prince so i can dissect the differences between our gojos too…#my spontenous take was just that maybe my gojo is a lil more twisted..? cruel maybe? but i honestly dont know #i feel like theyre both soft and kind but also a little sick in the head #maybe ur gojo is a bit more spoiled or coddled……… less detached?? mickey im so interested in him u dont even know #i cant wait to learn more!!!#ask tag ✩

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sucre-sanguine · 2 months

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maybe one day we'll have trans spaces that don't repackage and heavily reinforce the same body standards that make cis people feel like shit about themselves

#fr in so many spaces it feels like run of the mill dysphoria isnt bad enough??#you cant just transition you still gotta hate yourself for being a small man or a larger woman #like im honestly pretty neutral/positive about my body rn but you'd think id have to be cursing my fate lest i been seen as infected by #-'female beauty standards'#this is literally the shit that gives cis dudes orthorexia or whatever #likewise im so sorry to my sisters who gotta deal with toxic lady standards bumped up 1000 percent as part of 'transition goals'#and presented as an aspirational part of womanhood #something being a common insecurity doesn't mean reinforcement of it is good??#are we not already fucked enough

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batz · 11 months

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realizing its almost been 6 months since top surgery:)

#frank.txt #despite all the complications i had w healing im rlly happy w how my chest looks:)#ALTHOUGH. ONE BIG COMPLAINT #i used to use my bras as an extra pocket for my phone or lighter or whatever. but now i dont wear bras and therefore have no extra pocket #:( u win some u lose some :(#anyway all shirts look awesome on me now AND i can wear t shirts w funny text or image ans ppl wont feel awkward reading it:)#also the scars r fading rlly well! they almost blend in w my skin completely! (keyword almost. theyr still visible atp)#the way the scars r shaped is interesting bc theyre like a U shape. but bc of that when i inevitably build my pectoral muscles #the scars should blend into the shadow caused by thr muscle. i also dont have a Completrly flat chest bc im fat:0 #tbh my surgeon did rlly well . i have a lot of problems with him bc hes kind of a dick but from like. idk an artistic standpoint hes good #but the doctor standpoint hes Uhm. well i lost a nipple and had severe infection due to denied antibiotics and lack of aftercare #BUT. the lost nipple isnt visible and it looks normal now somehow AND. i didn't die from the infection so. I mean #i just had to spend christmas with a fever of 103 LMAO #HONESTLY THO i would do it again EVEN if i knew i would go thru hell bc this surgery fuckn saved my life holy shit #i didnt realize just how much i dissociated from my own body bc of dysphoria. now i feel more in touch with it and happy!:)#also now i can Eventually get that chest tattoo i wanted for like 7 years lmao #erm yippee:)

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skeletalheartattack · 7 months

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Thoughts on the new tf2 maps?

well, i can't give my thoughts on all 12 maps that were added, as my experience with them has been queuing through casual, and bots are absolutely ruining the fun of trying to play these maps, so i'll try and provide my thoughts with just the ones i've done.

Spineyard: i think ive only played a few rounds of it, but i like the maps looks and layout. the mafia skeletons are neat, although i couldn't figure out what the piles of money they dropped did. overall, pretty good payload map.

Lava Pit: it's gravel pit with a lot of lava pits, it's alright, i don't have much to say about it.

Mannsylvania: so, player destruction and king of the hill maps are kinda my least favourite gamemodes, but from what i played of the map. it's neat, i like how the map looks.

Slime: only actually got to play this map for one match with 5 players on both teams, since every other time was just flooded with bots. i like it, despite my disliking of king of the hill. the salmenn are fun skeleton replacements, i think i like them better than the other skeleton reskins. they've got fun designs too.

Perks: really liked the map, though i always do kinda wish valve would add more modular support for arena mode, so map makers don't have to resort to using other gamemodes like koth and player destruction just to simulate arena. i only played like three whole matches, with like 4 players on each team. wish i had played with more cause i did really like the concept.

Murky: im conflicted with the idea of a zombies mode in TF2, mostly just from a design standpoint. each class has their own zombie perks, some work fine, others feel lacking. with 9 classes, i think you eventually spread yourself thin with trying to come up with unique abilities that are useful for taking out the survivors. the map itself is fine. mostly had to deal with a lot of bot rounds before i could enjoy the map.

Atoll: the visual design of the map is really nice, though with how open the map is, it's tough to play as zombies, as humans have the high ground. playing as a sniper zombie, who can shoot acid, sucks a lot since you can't really get a read on how far your projectiles drop. engineer zombies have a similar problem, though with them, it's nearly impossible to see the travel arc of your pipebombs.

every other map, i've just not had enough time playing them. both due to bots and also because im doing my halloween contracts in the order it gives me.

#ask #anon #an infection mode in tf2 is something i feel needs at least a year of work and testing before it can work #MVM for example needed 3 years. from 2009 to 2012.#the biggest issue with an infection mode is honestly engineers #i feel if they had a sentry buster adjacent zombie thats selected every once in a while. thatd help disperse nests.#but i know there's likely issues with that. such as parts of the map that are only accessable via blast jumping #but with that i think theyd need to buff the zombie classes who can get to those areas. soldier being that class #he can jump high. but thats it. he really needs knockback resistance so he can get up to tough spots without interference #cause whats the point of vertical mobility if enemy heavys. engineer sentries. and pyros can push you away #but. thats all i can think of atm that i feel would improve the zombies side of the mode.#infection also kinda sucks with lower player numbers. especially when the zombie team starts smaller. its hard to push against sentries #atleast having a sentry buster adjacent zombie would help across all team sizes #atleast in theory #anyway. i dont really have as much passionate thoughts about the other maps or modes beyond whats stated above #i dont feel my opinions on this kind of stuff matters all that much though #im just a guy on tumblr #anyway! thank you for the ask anon!

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katyspersonal · 1 month

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3 for Aldrich, Aldia, Willem & Laurence

9 for Maria

11 for Micolash & Aldrich

24 for Laurence

(Asks from this ( x ) meme)

3) What first drew you to this character?

As for Aldrich, I vaguely recall finding out that he checks the traits I like the most? He was one of the characters I've learned about through fandom and not on my own, and I think this ancient meme about summarises it:

Also:

@val-of-the-north SHUDDUP you're basically so horny for Laurence/Logarius/Snatchers that you can't even picture them in your mind in any way but being naked!!!!!!! *casts the stone back at u*

With Laurence, like with Mico, it was the very first glance at the character in Youtube compilation with boss themes and concept art image. I did not know the lore yet, but the design and the music made me imagine Laurence as sort of aged, sagely librarian. I could not imagine back then that his boss fight would be him being a "helpless abhorrent little mewmew" as kids call it! Heck, I thought he'd have dialogue despite the monster form x) In a way, my first impression was not wrong, with the cut content of him actually talking even in a beast form, and implication of him being a son of Cainhurst cut content librarian NPC! I have intuition for cut content before having information, hahaha!

I have nothing to say about Willem. It might be a memory gap thing, but I swear at some point I feel I was turned off and then booted back up with liking this character already installed in my system x) As for Aldia.... ugh for fuck's sake... yeah, it was this legend:

youtube

I was absolutely floored by this stupid vid even without knowing any context, but I also instantly liked this character. I didn't even know his name yet, but the voice acting and long yapping about philosophy already pulled me in XD (Also unironically, this video is precisely how I give relationship advice fhfhdds)

9) Does this character remind you of anyone you know? Does that affect how you see them?

Yeah, I know this person. I know them very well. I know them more than anyone else. Someone who was misguided (by their destructive influence mentor figure, by their own foolishness and past history, or combination of both, who can tell anymore?) into committing awful things, then despaired over their sins and attempted redemption but also failed in some way? This person is me. At some point I've found myself in front of horrible truth about my past life and personality, and knew I was guilty and sullied forever. That it was over for me as a human being, but that didn't matter, and I could only keep people safe by locking myself away and trying to serve something better.

......annnnd it took a few years of more informed people to (metaphorically) shake me and slap my face into lucidity, explaining to me that I've fallen for the "BPD demonization" that was going far beyond than my individual failure as a friend, and we are always accused of abuse and causing irreversible harm when the worst we do is being emotionally overbearing. I kept losing trust to those friends, telling them that they were enablers who tried to gaslight me into thinking I was not 'that much of a monster', until it was other people with BPD who 'shook me and slapped my face into lucidity'. xd Nonetheless, even though now I know the truth about how society treats BPDs, I remember the feeling of being so monstrous and harmful that I was not even allowed to "touch" people with my dirty hands, how my reality used to be. So, I could write Maria going through this effortlessly, especially considering what she did was more plain and tangible!

In fact... thank you for asking me about this, because I kept wondering why I had such frequent dreams about being Maria, and why the Maria in my dreams acts like abused child that took back control against Gehrman despite my portrayal of the guy being so different. And now the puzzle is solved! That part of me still lives inside, it seems.

11) How did you “fall in love” with this character?

Already answered this for Micolash here: ( x )! As for Aldrich, it was through properly analysing the bigger picture and context of his actions. I've figured that his madness was, in fact, being informed on what was far too ahead of everyone else around him! He, like the rest of the cast, is trapped in the rotting, doomed world in which the only choices are 1) "die with dignity" or 2) commit something unthinkable from moral standpoint for a chance to escape. And will morality of the rotting world will matter in the new world anyways? Won't it all be left behind and be forgiven?

The guy also tried to take everyone else he could with him, like sort of a fucked up Noah's Arc! I can tell that they reused the concept with Rykard, at least, I am glad they know what works xD I'd say that the sadism he experienced upon eating people was either result of insanity (he understood a thing no one should understand), or still didn't exclude the bigger purpose (egotistically revelling in how holy he is helping everyone and doing what no one else dared, which would be like my Laurence). In any case, I have the strongest respect to the courage it takes to transcend the bonds of morality and compassion in order to to greater good. Being burdened with the knowledge of how the world really works, and choosing to push through instead of still being bound... This is why I also like Fauxsefka; learning how this world works, she chose to turn people into Kin so they can't ever become beasts. I am weak for this trope, you don't understand.

24) Do you ever dream about this character? If so, describe a dream you once had about them.

Laurence appears in my dreams only in two contexts: 1) Micolaurence or 2) dreams about finding secret files in Bloodborne that reveal his canonical appearance before beasthood! I can tell the latter comes from my everlasting unsatisfaction with my design for him, because I love it but it doesn't feel "fitting" and I can't identify why!

The former, I think, fandom rubbing onto me x) In two of these dreams, I was Laurence. In other two, I was Micolash. In one of Laurence dreams it was mutual, in the second one I was in love unrequited. In one of Micolash dreams, it was mutual, and in another it was not.. Basically, my dreams allows me to experience this ship from every possible angle. o_o Waiting for more I guess fhhdfsfd

______________

Thank you for asking! And.. without exaggeration, you've just done quite a psychological work on me by just asking the right thing. I need to think about that, hahaha

#bloodborne #dark souls 3 #aldrich devourer of gods #laurence the first vicar #soulsborne #ask replies #personal #memories #dreams #honestly I remember Maria in my dreams hiding in the closet like an abused bullied child.. that big strong woman reduced to this #and I finally know why it was this way #I'd rather not sully Gehrman with something as dirty as my stepdad of course he deserves so much more and he is his own man #I just don't like the approach of turning characters with their own stories and personality into vessels for my trauma #it feels like frenzied flame: you got infected by it and you have unending need to spread it. to scorch the world in your pain.#I don't think this approach would help my healing but instead make me feel worse by nourishing the trauma #I am keeping it sealed away from the world forever now </3 #see this is why it hurts me so much when gehrman haters accuse me of being insensitive to people that want to project their negative-#-experiences with men and misogyny onto him even if that means twisting the actual story and character. I do have a reason to do it myself #I just choose not to because I personally dislike the idea of making fandomry about myself more and about source material less #I don't want to bring the pain and horrors inside me into something that doesn't have them. some things can stay clean!#the passive aggression between canon worshippers and fanon enforcers is something that cannot be avoided in the fandoms #and I disapprove of the lie about 100% peace and mutual respect between the 'camps'. we will never FULLY like each other #each thinks their approach is more productive for the community. and that's fine!

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