#im so tired of racists and white fetishization | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hauntedpearl · 2 years

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afadshd I SAID I WON'T SAY ANYTHING BUT. hmm. okay. this is gonna bug me i need to get it out. i think we as a fandom just. forget some things about the show. the thing is, canonically, dean doesn't have an "Asian woman fetish" because the show does not acknowledge it as a thing that even deserves such terminology. every male character on the show is into that porn mag (remember that teenager sam bodyswapped with? proof enough i think if this random kid also had a copy of it. oh also! old vintage bab at the bunker 😐). it's essentially the only porn mag that's explicitly shown on screen on the show. like. THAT'S the issue. the problem is that the show normalizes fetishizing Asians to the point where the only form of East-Asian rep until, i guess, Kevin (??????like???god?????) is like. bab. sgfshsjd IT'S INGRAINED IN THE SHOW THAT BADLY. LIKE. IT'S FUCKED UP. like. essentially. the show is saying that if you're into women, you're into bab. which. hmm okay. i mean I'm not as offended as i probably should be when i sometimes come across it in fic bc i am a tired old asian woman and i filter it out for my personal enjoyment of things. (which. again. tired old person. im careful enough, but i just need white people to know that I am one extremely hardened and tolerant person who puts herself out there for conversations like this all the time and therefore is USED to it to the point of being able to shake it off pretty easily. but like. this is not the norm and IT SHOULD. NOT. BE)

(also engagement with fanfic and traditional media is like different for me but ig that's a whole other conversation. im so much more forgiving w fanfic.)

anyway. this is me just trying to tell you that bab is not an essential part of Dean's sexuality. it's not a personal thing for him, being fetishistic about Asians. Bab is the show being like that. it's the camera. ghostfacers effect or whatever. In a world where eric kripke is not one seriously messed up insane man, it would probably just be some skinmag with like. idk. naked cowgirls or whatever ykwim? like please don't think you're veering from canon when you remove it from your work/discussions/whatever. you're not. you're just ignoring it like you're ignoring other stupid stuff that the narrative normalizes for you.

also. i am not trying to coddle any white people, but i need you to understand that doing a racism ≠ being a racist. like i think a lot of you are afraid of owning up to racisms because you think you'll be branded a racist (in this case, a gun touting redneck who says slurs ig), and like. you need to divorce yourself from that kind of thinking my dudes. we all live in a white supremacist world (me, too, even in India so far away) we are ALL going to do some racisms some times. it's okay to acknowledge that and learn from it. like we are pigs in mud, some will get on you etc., the best you can do is like. see what went wrong. self-examine. reroute thinking to greener pastures.

OKAY STUPID LONG POST BUT YEAH

#i won't say anything about 4lw tho because i think it's more nuanced than that in case of that particular fic and it's like. okay whatever #like i kinda see what the author waa going for and im like ehhh okay whatever.#the thing is. im not terribly attached to it bc it was very smutty for me so like yeah it was cute but it's not Thee Fic or whatever for me #so im like SORRY BUT I DON'T CARE ABOUT HER IS THAT AWFUL 😭😂#but because all this discussion came up. i wanna talk about the overarching problem. which is not one fic or one person or one anything #it's the construct of the show and it's how you as a creator of fan content engage w it etc #don't @ me too much about this im TIRED AND STUPID #tw racism #long post

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total-ass · 3 years

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leonard does not deserve nearly the amount of hate that he gets. i’m tired of seeing leonard slander every day in the tag, i’m tired of seeing my king in the bottom of every tier list. i’ve seen him put below characters like amy and beth and stephanie who literally ruined every scene they were in. on what planet is leonard worse then an abuser or a fujoshi?

leonard has a lot of great things about him. for starters he’s one of the few nerdy characters that’s doesn’t wear glasses which is important...in a way. this fandom has an apparent “thing” for nerds with characters like noah and cody and harold and being popular. and yet, canonically nerdy characters like sam or leonard get little to no appreciation. it’s like this fandoms only interpretation of a nerd is conventionally attractive/white/skinny person oh, so you like nerds so much until they don’t look like they’re straight out of a tiktok house?

people say that he’s useless and annoying, ok and? the majority of total drama characters are useless and annoying. only 4-5 characters a season ever actually try to win. total drama fans are more forgiving on white characters being useless and annoying compared to their melaninated counterparts because they see the “”potential”” in them. that’s why people are so quick to stan staci or ezekial for...existing? but never consider characters like b or beardo or justin or leonard.

leonard was robbed twice in a row because fresh thinks poc are disposable unless thier arc revolves around the mustiest white boy imaginable. leonard had just as much potential as ezekiel and yet no one talks about it because this fandom actively ignores characters that aren’t white. ridonculous race was at least a few months after pahkitew iirc? they could of shown how much he’s matured since then, they could of given him a real motivation to win, they could of expanded his relationship with tammy; are they dating, are they just close friends? does one attempt to keep the other grounded in reality? how does the rest of the cast react to them? they could of had a character arc about realizing they don’t actually have powers and how to grow from there but since they weren’t a toxic couple with a comphet plot line, fresh immediately disposed of them. and no one cares because leonard isn’t cody-colored.

i’m not saying leonard should of won pahkitew or ridonculous race by any means, i’m not sure the world is ready for that much leonard, (personally i am but i know most total drama fans are cowards) but, you can’t act like it’s not a little suspicious that characters like him, katie, b and beardo were all first boots (with leonard being first boot twice) while the rest of the people of color that made it past the 5th episode were forced into the worst “”romance”” plotlines imaginable. (except for maybe dj, but he still got dealt really shitty plots for no reason >:/) if leonard had hooked up with sugar or if tammy was white i guarantee that fresh would of kept him around much longer.

i know only 5 people actually care for pahkitew but jesus, the lack of leonard art is appalling. leonard easily had one of the cutest designs in the show. i genuinely want to kiss him on the lips, he’s so adorable. that lanky man must truely be a wizard, cause he cast a spell on my heart, i can see what sugar saw in him. however, the only characters people are interested in drawing from the pahkitew cast are jasmine, shawn, sammy, scarlett and um...dave :/ (im not trying to shit on anyones favorite character but like..dave? the incel? ,,.really? :/) and surprise, surprise, 90 percent of that jasmine and dave art is ship art, with a white person. shocker :/. why does no one ship leonard and dave or something? this fandom loves shipping characters that hate each other so much. oh wait i know why, cause this fandom is repulsed by things that don’t involve white twinks. that’s why crack ships like dundie are universally praised to this day while iconic ships like notie are forgotten. (only real ones remember 2008 notie smh)

now for the record, i’m not saying hating leonard automatically makes you racist. i’ve seen a lot of people come in here and claim that not liking dave or sierra or cameron or whatever poc makes you inherently racist. while [white] total drama fans tend to use more explicitly derogatory language in regards to characters of color they don’t like (ex: the way gwanon talks about courtney vs. the way they talk about duncan despite hating both of them) but the difference between leonard and those other people is that leonard is actually well written and doesn’t suck. he only had positive qualities. leonard literally did nothing wrong and he gets so much hate for what??leonard didn’t actively hurt anyone, leonard didn’t commit any crimes, leonard didn’t fetishize someone’s mental illness. so i can’t help but side eye people that say hate leonard..it feels like they simply hate to see a nerdy black non binary wizard winning.

anyway, leonard deserves the entire world and i’m tired of people not recognizing it. so leonard antis ask yourself, why do you hate leonard so much? he’s just a funny wizard boy. and before you ask, yes i sent this is in as my college application.

#total drama #td #tdpi #tdrr #td leonard #td tammy #long post #...wow

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clonehub · 3 years

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Maybe one day I'll snap and truly stop being nice because what @milfcommandercody said on my lil essay is very true and YES I do want to go apeshit and start calling people bitches but the second any person of color anywhere says anything that's not nice we get called a bully. Folks keep accusing me of bullying and also of being white, for some reason. And they use both of those reasons to be like "see now I have no choice but to be racist and just sit here and not do anything about the racism I pretend to care about because those nasty ethnics the ~milfcrowd~ weren't super nice and holding my hand and wiping my ass >:(((((" Soon enough I'll fully lose it and we'll just see what happens from there.

But like the bizarreness in being fully rude and expecting nothing but civility in response. For several months now I've been getting nothing but racist responses to a post I made about antiBlackness and the fetishization of Black death on AO3. Someone said I didn't really care about Floyd's death and that I was just using it to coverup up my real goal, which was splitting everyone over support for AO3. Basically they called me a psyop. People accused me of just wanting censorship. Folks spread lies about who the real author of the fucked up fic I was referencing was. And then people kept making it about purity culture (a vicious form of oppression women in religious fundamentalist societies have to suffer under where their value as a human being is tied to their sexual purity for their husbands--not about fucking fanfiction) and THEN they started talking about """antis""" mind you, I'd come in saying "you people need to fucking do something about racist fanfictions. Something. Anything. Because as much as it's a community, clearly most of the members don't care."

And I think the funniest part of it all was when someone sarcastically said "you can't expect all your media to be pure". You know. Speaking down to a Black person about what I can and can't expect for Black people in media. I said the world will end before y'all start respecting Black people and they went to the lengths of changing their URL. Which is funny because two posts down they had reblogged something about listening to BIPOC.

And another person made a comment about antis just wanting this and that, and naturally I snapped and they started getting anons about how they should stay safe and "I hope nothing comes of this I hope it doesn't blow up" I'm sure y'all have seen my responses to those. I'm not nice. It's antiBlackness. my Black ass is not obligated to be nice to folks who just straight up disrespect Black people. Chew on it.

But then I remember those people who say "hmmm they're right but they're rude about it so ultimately I won't do anything :/" and it's like woooow you really really don't care then. You never cared! Youve centered your ego in your "activism" and I stg if you check these people pages they hardly say or do anything in support of PoC. Or even worse when they talk about supporting PoC but then they just reblog racist shit anyways dnsknsks "performative activist" the call is coming from inside the house! Accusing me and my friends and my friends friends' of being performative activists because of tone. Because our tone made you uncomfortable. Because you're assuming that we're not doing tangible work to support the groups that we're trying to defend on here--which is clown behavior through and through lmao.

I don't know where im going with this. I guess I'm mad. This shits tiring. Its exhausting. it's anxiety inducing for me and all my friends. I know for a fact that if me and my friends all shut up right now about racism in the fandom, racism in star wars, and racism in general, those that criticize us wouldn't change their behavior at all. They'd continue to not reblog PSAs about racism. They'd continue to not bother educating themselves or others about racism. They're not in the notes of even the basically informational posts about these things. These posts hardly even exist on their blogs. They prefer to reblog and write essays about bullying and fandom drama and antis and all the other things (mostly white) fandom mom types like to latch onto. They don't care and they never cared and they have the nerve to say we're defending ourselves wrong.

(please do not reblog 🤗 I'm just ranting and there's hardly cohesion to this post. But feel free to comment if you like)

#CH posts #long post #racism tw #antiBlackness #antiBlackness tw #when i say im fucking tired #naur bc these people dont point out any problems ever on their own #let me stop before i just start saying names

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bandomslayed · 3 years

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there was no 1D vs kpop drama the minho has a personal grudge against me and the liam that was in there and constantly made posts trying to get a reaction out of us and make us uncomfortable but at the same time cry we’re bullying them when this isn’t the only rp where they’ve done this and try to get us kicked out of groups for “bullying” when all we do is ignore them and try to go on with our days. the group had already closed before i told them to stop acting like they weren’t a 1D stan and didn’t used to rp as a niall.

so... i don't rly care for anyone's personal beef right? but when you, a white, playing a person of color try and use racism as a little gotcha point against white muses? you immediately made it my business and made yourself a hell of an enemy. idk how else to say this to u guys. playing kpop characters doesn't make u poc. U DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE NUANCES OF RACISM ur not even close to understanding them. don't try to overcompensate by "calling white people out on their racism" (which what ur actually doing is just using racism as a crutch) you look extremely ugly and ignorant and also are contributing to the harm, not the good.

listen, i know you will go above and beyond to justify your korean fetish. tbh? that's between you and god. go ahead and eat ur kbbq and kiss your jimin photocard w/e... but do not overstep in issues u don't have a semblance of understanding of. im literally tired of trying to explain this to u nicely, not nicely and in every other way i can think of. ur a fetishist ur a racist and that does NOT give u the room to talk about it. YOU! ARE! NOT! BETTER! THAN! OTHER! WHITES! FOR! PLAYING! POC! and u will literally never be. stop trying to other urself from the problem ur people have inflicted on our people since the asscrack dawn of times. you look stupid. you look like a mf clown wig included and it makes me simmer with rage. next white to say some "omg white people" shit where i can see it has to paypal me 3 thousand dollars actually.

#band rp #bandom rp

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la5t-res0rt · 4 years

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this was written several weeks ago in response to asks i was receiving i am posting it now it is very long the longest i have ever made and it is not very well edited but here it is in this final essay i talk about how shitty rae is about black people in her writing as well as just me talking about how her writing sucks in general lets begin

hello everyone

as you may know i have received a lot of anons in the last week or so about issues of racism in the beetlejuice community both just generally speaking and also within specific spaces

i was very frustrated to not be getting the answers i wanted because i typically do not talk about what i do not see but in an effort to be better about discourse i went looking through discourse from before my time in the fandom and i also received some receipts and information from my followers and from some friends

keep in mind that the voices and thoughts of bipoc are not only incredibly important at all times but in this circumstance it is important that if a bipoc has something to add you listen and learn and be better

i admit that when this happened i wasnt aware of the extent of what occurred and im angry at myself for not doing more at that time and i want to work harder to make sure something like this doesnt go unnoticed again

im a hesitant to talk about months old discourse because i have been criticized for bringing up quote old new unquote but this is very important and i am willing to face whatever comes from to me

lets talk about this

content from our local racist idiot that may be months old but its important

putting my thoughts under a cut to spare the dash but before i begin obviously this is awful

lets fucking unpack this folks

right out the gate op states that she supports artistic freedom but then within a couple words she goes against that statement

being entirely canon compliant isnt artistic freedom and even so if this person has so much respect for canon they wouldnt be out here erasing lydias obvious disgust for beetlejuice in the movie or ignoring lydias age for the sake of shipping that shit isnt canon either

also we love the quick jab at the musical there hilarious we love it dont we because god forbid a licensed and successful branch on a media have any standing in this conversation but whatever

now lets scroll down and talk about the term racebending

the term racebending was coined around 2009 in response to the avatar the last airbender movie a film in which the east asian races of the characters were erased by casting white actors in the three leading roles of aang sokka and katara

whenever the term racebending is used in a negative light it is almost always a case of whitewashing like casting scarlett johansen in ghost in the shell or the casting of white actors of the prince of persia sands of time instead of iranian ones

this kind of racebending erases minorities from beeing seen in media and is wrong

all that being said however racebending has also been noted to have very positive after effects like the 1997 adaptation of cinderella or casting samuel jackson as nick fury in the marvel movies nick fury was originally a white guy can you even imagine

i read this piece from an academic that said quote writers can change the race and cultural specificity of central characters or pull a secondary character of color from the margins transforming them into the central protagonist unquote

racebending like the kind that rae is so heated about is the kind of creative freedom that leads to more representation of bipoc in media which will never be a bad thing ever no matter how pissy you get about it

designing a version of a character as a poc isnt serving to make them necessarily better it serves to give new perspective and perhaps the opportunity to connect even more deeply with a character it doesnt marginalize or erase white people it can uplift poc and if you think uplifting poc is wrong because it tears down white people or whatever youre a fucking moron and you need to get out of your podunk white folk town and see the real world

the numbers of times a bipoc particularly a bipoc that is also lgbt+ has been represented in media are dwarfed by what i as a white dude have seen myself represented in media is and that isnt okay that isnt equality and its something that should change not only in mainstream media but in fandom spaces as well

lets move down a bit further to the part about bullying straight people which is hilarious and lets also talk about the term fetishistic as well lets start with that

this person literally writes explicit pornography of a minor and an adult are we really going to let someone like that dictate what is and what isnt fetishistic

similarly to doing a positive racebend situation people may project lgbt+ headcanons on a character because its part of who they are and it helps them feel closer to the character and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that

depicting lgbt+ subject matter on existing characters isnt an inherently fetishistic action generally things only really become fetishistic when the media is being crafted and hyped by people who are outside of lgbt+ community for example how young teens used to flip a tit about yaoi or how chasers fetishize trans people

but drawing a character with top surgery scars or headcanoning them as trans is harmless and its just another way to interpret a character literally anone could be trans unless if their character bio says theyre cis and most of them dont go that deep so it really is open to interpretation and on the whole most creators encourage this sort of exploration because it is a good thing to get healthy representation out in the world

as for it being used to bully straights thats just funny i dont have anything else on that like if youre straight and you feel threatened and bullied because of someone headcanoning someone as anything that isnt cishet youre a fucking idiot and a weak baby idiot at that like the real world must fucking suck for you because lgbt+ people are everywhere and statistically a big chunk of your favorite characters arent cishet sorry be mad about it

lets roll down a bit further about the big meat of the issue which was when several artists were drawing interpretations of lydia as a black girl which i loved but clearly this person didnt love it because they have a very narrow and very racist and problematic view of what it means to be a black person

and before i move forward i must reiderate that i am a white person and you should listen to the thoughts of poc people like @fright-of-their-lives or @gender-chaotic it is not my place to explain what the black experience is like and it certainly isnt this persons either

implying that the story of a black person isnt worth telling unless if the character faces struggles like racism and prejudice is downright moronic

why use the word kissable to describe a black persons lips now thats what i call fetishistic and its to another extreme if youre talking about a black version of lydia on top of that

the author of this post says herself that shes white so clearly shes the person whos an authority on the black experience and what it means to be a black person right am i reading that right or am i having a fucking conniption

how about allowing black characters to exist without having to struggle why cant a black version of lydia just be a goth teenager with a ghost problem who likes photography and is also black like she doesnt have to move to a hick town and get abused by racist folks she doesnt have to go through any more shit than she already goes through and if you honestly think thats the only way to tell a black persons story you need to get your brain cleaned

you know nothing about the complexities about being a black person and i dont either but you know wh odo black people who are doing black versions of canon characters they fucking know

lets squiggle down just a bit further

so the writer has issues with giving characters traits like a broad nose or larger lips if theyre a woman but if theyre a man suddenly its totally okay to go all ryan murphy ahs coven papa legba appropriation when approaching character design like are you fucking stupid do you hear yourself is that really how you see black men like what the fuck is wrong with you

none of the shit youre spewing takes bravery it takes ignorance and supreme levels of stupidity

do you really think you with your fic where a black lgbt+ woman is tortured and abused where you use the n word with a hard r to refer to her like that shits not okay its fucking depraved and yeah we know you love being shitty but like christ on a bike thats so much

can we also talk about this

what the fuck is this fetishistic bull roar garbage calling this black character beyonce dressing her up in quote fuck me heels unquote are you are you seriously gonna write this and say its a shining example of how to write a black character youre basically saying ope here she is shes a sex icon haha im so progressive and i clealry understand the black experience hahahaha fuck you oh my god

on top of that theres a point where this character is only referred to as curly hair or the fact that the n word is used in the fic with the hard r like thats hands down not okay for you to use especially not in a manner like this jesus christ

oop heres a little more a sampling for you of the hell i am enduring in reading this drivel

oh boy lets put a leash on the angry black woman character lets put her in a leash and have the man imply hes a master like are you kidding me are you for real and what the fuck is with calling her shit like j lo and beyonce do you actually think thats clever at all are you just thinking of any poc that comes into your head for this

also lydia fucking tells this girl that she shouldnt have lost her temper like she got fucking leashed im so tired why is this writing so problematic and also so bad

hold up before i lose my head lets look at some of her own comments on the matter of this character and what happens to her

hi hello youre just casually tossing the word lynch out there in the wide open world as if thats not a problem that is still real like are you fucking unhinged there have been multiple cases of this exact thing happening in our firepit of a country in the last five months alone like how can you still have shit like this up for people to read how can you be proud of work like this in this climate

and also what the fuck is that last bit

what the actual fuck

i dont speak for black people as a white person but you do!? im sorry i had to get my punctuation out for that because wow thats fucking asinine just because one black person read your fic and didnt find the torture and abuse of your one black character abhorrant doesnt mean that the vast majority of people not only in the fandom but in the human population with decency are going to think its okay because its not

i started this post hoping to be level headed and professional but jesus fucking christ this woman is something else white nationalism is alive and well folks and its name is rae

if you defend this woman you defend some truly abhorrant raecism

editors notes

in order to get some perspective on these issues more fully some of the writing by the author was examined and on the whole it was pretty unreadable but i want to just call back to the very beginning of this essay where the person in question talked about holding canon in high regard but then in their writing they just go around giving people magic and shit and ignoring the end of the movie entirely like are you canon compliant or nah

the writing doesnt even read like beetlejuice fanfic it reads as self indulgent fiction you could easily change the names and its just a bad fanfic from 2007

also can we talk about writing the lesbian character as an angry man hater like its 2020 dude and als olets touch on that girl on girl pandering while beetlejuice is just there like here we go fetishizing again wee

i cant find a way to work this into this already massive post but

im going to throw up

okay so thats a lot we have covered a lot today and im sure my ask box will regret it but this definitely should have been more picked apart when it happened

please feel free to add more to this i would love more perspectives than just my own.

#long post #racism #raecism #im so tired #thanks for reading

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nix-that-rad-lass · 3 years

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https://www.hrc.org/resources/5-things-to-know-to-make-your-feminism-trans-inclusive

this was on facebook. here was a response:

“sorry hon, feminism will never include men, even if they dress like women... wait, i thought clothes dont have a gender? make up your damn minds. and stop harassing women who disagree. full. stop. “

reply by transcultist: Something tells me you didnt read the article

op: something tells me i dont have to to know that its all male inclusive bullshit.upon reading it: 1. trans women are NOT women- if they were real women, they wouldnt be trans. a prerequisite to be a transwoman is to be biologically male. no shame in being a transwoman, but you aint a real woman aka adult human female 2. transphobia is offensive and harmful- it is! but nowadays, saying that lesbians shouldnt be forced to have sex with a bio male, or that bio sex exists is labelled transphobia which is not true. acknowledging reality is not transphobic 3. to be trans inclusive is to be intersectional- FALSE. intersectional feminism related to the intersection of RACISM and SEXISM. NOT men wanting to be women. it is racist to say otherwise. 4. trans women are feminist leaders- no, trans women are males and cannot be feminists. especially since they believe femaleness is a choice. 96% of trans identified males aka transwomen are white, so no, twoc are not leaders of the movement. the person who started the stonewall riot? Storme DeLarverie, a black lesbian. Johnson was not there for several hours and did not identify as transgender. he was a gay transvestite. aka crossdresser. Transwomen in positions of power repeatedly are outed for rape, pedophilia, and homophobia. I could go on. but i wont because im tired. and you probs havent even read this far. 5. centering the most marginalized is key- honey men aint marginalized period. idgaf if they believe theyre women, but their fetish (yes, some 98% of the time it is a fetish) doesnt make them marginalized. thats like saying that people who like to choke their partner during sex are victims of oppression instead of depraved psychopaths who get off to pretending to murder or abuse their partner. yes, i am happy to back all this up with receipts, links, articles, and more. i have 45 pages of essays, receipts, and links. half the links are links to masterposts- so i have some 1000 or more in total. thanks for your time and you are welcome for mine

TC: Its not all male inclusive bullshit just because you want to take out your anger and frustration on those that are a weaker target

OP: they are not a weaker target. they have male biology, have been raised male, and male privilege. f off... also im guessing you didnt even read beyond the first sentence of my reply... how typical for a tr@nscultist

OP commenter had to censor some stuff because yall know how facebook is.

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anemoianomaly · 5 years

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Tagged by @mariesmh! Thanks, hunny 💕 I've never done this before haha but I have so many music opinions so this is v perfecto

I'm tagging @firefox-official @idecentlydrawnkishiberohan @heyhauntsman @yofukit @im-big-dumb @troiloka @belaroseoli @syliic . Feel free to not do this or whateva

1: A song you like with a color in the title

Pink in the Night by (the one and only) mitski

2: A song you like with a number in the title

99 Luftballoons (I forgot the band name I'm sorry)

3: A song that reminds you of summertime

ohhh I have. So, so many. I listen to 80's Japanese city pop like a plant follows the sun...Remember Summer Days by ??? and Magic Ways by Tatsuro Yamashita are definitely some that give big summer energy

Also, Bullfighter Jacket by Miniature Tigers holds nostalgic summer vibes for me. Reminds me of when my sister and I would sing it on long car rides when I was 9

4: A song that reminds you of someone you'd like to regret

Oh boy...there was this girl I had a silly yet obsessive crush on who, with hindsight, was racist/colorist. She has said that she'd rather die than have dark skin (while next to my dark skinned friend 🙃), said that she thinks all the black people at are school are bad people, and has fetishized Asians. I am so sorry to say she was a BTS fan...it just makes it...so much worse. "Fake Love" hellllla reminds me of her and I hate it bc my sister listens to BTS spiritually...god what a ride

5: A song that needs to be played out loud

Take on Me by A-ha

It needs to be SCREAMED

6: A song that makes you want to dance

Rasputin by Boney M, Gimme Gimme Gimme by ABBA, Like a Record by Dead or Alive, DARE by Gorillaz and Swing by VST and Company make me freaking g r o o v e

7: A song that makes you happy

Doctor by Jack Stauber, Rebel Rebel by David Bowie, and Don't Stop Me Now by Queen are guaranteed dopamine machines

8: A song you never get tired of listening to

Dreams by Fleetwood Mac n cheese, Dress Down by Kaoru Akimoto, Killing Me Softly by the Fugees, I'd Like to Walk Around in your Mind Someday by Vashti Bunyan, and After the Storm by Kali Uchis are The Songs that I have listened to about 48 times in a row before and could listen to 100000 times more because their just so creative and wonderful and perfect and AaaAAAAH I love these songs

9: A song you'd love to be played at your wedding

Two Slow Dancers by mitski would be SO perfect

Lord, this question just reminded me of how my sister used to do photography at weddings and at every single one she went to, they'd always play that one Ed Sheeran song that's just like "baBY weE foun luve rite wheERE wE arre" ajajakamakcjdn gotdam... cishet white folks with names like Jevylynn and Aydynn really be like that, huh?

10: A song that's covered by another artist

Dear Prudence by Siouxsie and the Banshees is so lovely

11: A song you would sing as a duet in karaoke

SUMMER NIGHTS FROM THE MOVIE/PLAY GREASE

It's so fun to sing and mess up on

12: A song that makes you Think About Life

Some Things Just Stick In Your Mind by Vashti Bunyan and the entire Spirited Away soundtrack. Despite being beautiful and very positive songs, it always makes me feel...so much smaller than I am, so much more fragile, ungrateful for the life I take for granted, so...missing out on an adventure right in front of me ya know?

Another song that has a different feel to that which makes me v contemplative is Life on Mars by David Bowie. It's so melancholy and it's what it feels like at the edge of the night after several mental breakdowns, but still having the problem that the mental breakdowns caused and you can't do anything about it, which I sadly relate to

13: A song with a person's name in the title

Dirty Diana by Micheal Jackson

14: A song you think everyone should listen to

Innuendo by Queen

15: A song by a band you wish was still together

And She Was by Talking Heads

16: A song by an artist who is no longer living

I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston

17: A song that makes you want to fall in love

I Want to Dance with Somebody by Donna Summer and Somebody to Love by Queen

18: A song that breaks your heart

Purple Rain by Prince and Love of my Life by Queen

Not even just the lyrics, but the slow and powerful tone of these songs makes them so disheartening, like you just lost someone your whole life revolved around and your reminiscing the memories you had together and getting over how there will never be more no matter how much you want to see them smile again or how much you want them to make you smile again, although they hurt you

AAAAAAH my heart ouch ow oh agh my soul ugh

19: A song you remember from your childhood

Sweet Dreams (are made of this) by eurythmics

20: A song that reminds you of yourself

When I am depressi, I'm Washing machine heart by mitski, but when I'm feeling Gucci I'm Dancing Queen by abba

#tagged #this is long haha #rambles #me

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kimgdoyoung · 6 years

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My opinion

I'm really sad and really mad at how NCTzen's manage to turn everything NCT TRIES to do to interact with us into a fucking nightmare.

Why you all have to send them so many creepy as fuck memes, edits and questions that aren't even funny? Why you have to ruin this to them and to us NCTzens that actually asked them interesting questions we were really excited to know the answers?

Why ate lots of you so FUCKIN STUPID!?

It really amazes me how fast this fandom became so trash, and not is not even about other fandom attacking NCT, is because of this type of behavior that not only creeps me out but also may damage NCT image and creep them aswell.

I'm going to repeat this loud and proud:

Not every Chinese, Korean or Japanese Idol is gay.

Not every white people is racist.

Not every society works like Occidental societies and also not every society got acces to the same type of information and the same ways to acces to said information.

Music tastes don't defines someone particular pov, just because someone likes a song from a certain artist you hate makes said idol racist/homophobic/misogynist.

Not every idol will live up to your expectations because they are also humans that want to live up to their own expectations.

Enough is enough, and NCTzen's have cross a line, you all don't care about them, you just want to fulfil your fantasies, your fetishes, your ideals, you portray your own desires on them and it wouldn't be wrong if you all were conscious about the fact they are humans with their own ideas and own personalities and likes.

I'm tired of so many of you saying the same bullsh*t to excuse your ignorance about THEIR CULTURES, "iS not that deep", my ass, learn to understand them so we can have more closeness to them, their society, their language, their culture, is not that difficult to try and research about them, about their countries and how they HAVE TO behave in public, television or just in South Korea.

Lots of you are a bunch of hypocrites, wants them to know what your countries language and culture is but you can't take 5 minutes to learn how to use Google Translate.

How sad is to know Johnny & Doyoung are "healthy social media use" Embassadors for 2018 campaign yet they can't make a poll without you blow things out of proportion, without you trending useless hashtags, without you being immature.

Sometimes I feel sorry for them to have a fandom like this, but I guess as long as they see people that actually respects them and are here to support and love them with what they give us, they will have enough strength to continue.

I feel ashamed to know some crackheads really have the audacity to tag them on memes of Yuta fucking a minion, Taeyong as a furry and some really other cr*epy memes that more than funny were disgusting, rude and offensive.

Call me a hypocrite if you want cuz lots of my tags are "too sexual" but guess what, I know that is not going to happen ever, I know when to actually use them and when to not, I am not out there asking them if they're a top or a bottom, if they scks each other's D, im not out there asking Doyoung to wear crop tops, high heels, and fishnets to fulfil my own desires and fantasies, you are taking this to a new level of stupidity and disrespect.

That is not even being inclusive, is just you all assuming they are gay, is you all make g assumptions about topics that may or may not be delicate to their personal believes.

What a shame this fandom is so disrespectful to their idols that have been working their asses off for us and only us, yet you all can't even give them the little freedom they need.

#kim doyoung #nct #nct 127 #nctzen #i hope they never ever want to interact with us #so you all fakes drop the fandom and finally they get to see #the real fans that care for them #personal opinion #i dont care about you all calling me out #it really cross a limit #and you need to fucking learn #what respeact means

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notyourasiandream-blog · 5 years

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As an Asian American femme here is why im tired of dating white men.

1. No matter how much you really try to avoid it there is always a possibility that they have “ yellow fever” and you are their fetish.

2. The fact that they are racist and don’t even know it or don’t care to see how some of the things they say are racist. I once was told by a tinder date that he doesn’t normally date Asian girls because people that share his same major of comp science tend to fetishize Asian women. But for me. I looked Americanized enough that he swiped right. Ok wow. Thanks for totally stripping my culture away from me just because you think I am “ white passing enough”.

3. They don’t care to know about your culture. Even in a long term relationship I was in he just couldn’t care less if I made a traditional Japanese meal. He never asked me how I made it or how I learned this recipe to him it was just another dish that he could pour Sriracha and Soyu all over before he even tasted it ;even though the dishes were never meant to taste that salty or spicy. Don’t get me wrong he was a good guy but he never realized what a slap in the face that was.

4. As an Asian American the scale of racism that I experience on a daily is exhausting. And it’s even more exhausting to have to constantly teach or explain to people why something is racist and the emotional impact it has on me. Something so small as just venting to my former partner and he just brushes it off saying “ maybe that’s not how they meant it” can really take a toll. I constantly felt the need to speak up and validate my anger towards the racism I experience. Something a white man will never experience.

5. I constantly am trying to learn more on social activism around me because I am in the middle of it as a queer Asian American social issues are an important aspect of my life. The fact in which that I was constantly trying to learn more and stand up for oppressed people and the white men I have dated get to sly by and not try to expand their knowledge and be a true ally. A former partner of mine refused to go to the rally’s with me when president trump was elected. He told me it won’t change anything and that it was not worth my time and he didn’t understand why I would want to spend hours on the street getting shot with rubber bullets, pepper sprayed and flash banged. I had to explain to him it wasn’t something I wanted to do but something I needed to do. Coming from a family where my mother is not an American citizen I had to be in the front lines i had a right to scream and show my anger that a misogynistic racist got elected as our president. After a while he came to one rally with me but I still felt like he was doing it to get on my good side instead of being there to support the people being oppressed and using his privilege in a white male body to put himself between the cops and the people that needed protection.

6. The idea that white men think I enjoy being compared to other Asians. So many people including my white father have made the statement that all Asians look the same. It honestly makes my skin crawl. For example A guy in one of my classes was talking to me during our break about how I remind him of his girlfriend and I actually kind of look like her because she is also Asian with tattoos. It made me internally scream. Just because her and I are both Asian femmes with tattoos does not mean that we look alike!

7. White men will never understand the little things that connect me with my culture and the importance of those things in my life. Growing up Japanese American i never watched Star Wars or Lord of the rings, i grew up on Sailor moon and Studio Ghibli movies. Totoro is my all time favorite movie; it reminds me of a part of my childhood that I hold close to my heart. But I understand that I get something out of it that many other people do not. However, it is important to realize when something is important to someone you care about, even if it is not your cup of tea and appreciate it. A person i was seeing didn’t understand that. When I sat down and tried to watch Totoro with him in the middle of it he got up and started doing something else, he didn’t realize what a huge impact that had on me and how it was a blatant “fuck you” to me.

8. I do not need you white men to save me. As an Asian American femme I know that I am petite and I know how we are viewed as weak and submissive. But that is not me, I don’t need you to “stand up” for me when in all reality you are just getting in some guys face because you feel as though it is the toxic masculine thing to do. Let me be clear, I can fight for myself, I might be Asian but I am not submissive. I am loud and angry so I don’t need you to come and be a knight in shinning armor I need you to realize I am my own person with my own strengths and can handle my issues with others on my own.

#asian americans #why i am tired of dating white men #asian experience #rant #asian femmes #femmes #personal experience

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stupidtwinkmac · 6 years

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you asked for my full psychology notes so here they are

i rewatched the entire series and wrote down all the things i thought were relevant to the characters’ psychology, theres probably some stuff missing so message me if you think i should add anything

S1e1- “The Gang Gets Racist”

Dennis wants paddys to stay a gay bar bc he likes getting validation from gay boys

“They’re really more of a blue-green”

S1e3- “Underage Drinking: A National Concern”

Dennis talks about how popular he was in high school and cries a bit when mac and charlie tell him that tim murphy slept with his prom date which is like pretty normal but it foreshadows the high school reunion episode

Dee goes out with a high schooler just for the validation and to live out shit she couldn't do in high school

“Wait but ive never statutory raped anyone before”

Mac and charlie give high schoolers a keg bc they said that mac and charlie were cool

Mac gets jealous that everyone got asked to a high school prom except for him

S1e7- “Charlie Gets Molested”

Mac gets jealous that he didn't get molested

“If the McPoyles got blown, and Charlie got blown, then why didn't I get blown?”

charlie got molested by his uncle

S2e4- “Mac Bangs Dennis’ Mom”

Dennis gets pissed that people's moms wont fuck him

“Is everyone getting laid but me?”

S2e7- “The Gang Exploits A Miracle”

Dennis starves himself for three days because Dee said his face looked fat

S3e1- “The Gang Finds A Dumpster Baby”

Dennis pretends to be a hippie just to fuck some guys girlfriend because he insulted his quaff and called him a narc

S3e2- “The Gang Gets Invincible”

Dee pretends to be a guy to try out for the eagles just to prove that she can

s3e5 - “The Aluminium Monster Vs. Fatty Magoo”

Dennis goes on a Whole Thing to prove that he’s a winner and that he hasn't peaked

“I haven't even begun to peak”, “make it work dennis… make it work”

S3e6- “The Gang Solves the North Korea Situation”

Dee does the talent show every year to validate herself

S3e11- “Dennis Looks Like A Registered Sex Offender”

Dennis obsesses over his jawline and his weight when people tell him he looks like wendell

Mac’s dad gets out of jail and we can see how neglectful his parents are

S4e3- “America’s Next Top Paddy’s Billboard Model Contest”

Dennis desperately tries to prove that he’s still hot enough to be on the billboard

“I was sculpted to the proportions of Michelangelo's David”

“I realized that i don’t need validation anymore”- proves that he was just doing the billboard stuff bc of a bpd need for validation.

S4e4- “Mac’s Banging the Waitress”

Dennis gets unreasonably upset when he finds out that Charlie doesn't think he’s his best friend

Mac bangs the waitress to get back at Charlie for smashing his project badass tapes

S4e5- “Mac and Charlie Die Pt 1”

Dennis gets more upset that Mac and Charlie didn't include him in their suicide pact than he is about them being “dead”

S5e2- “The Gang Hits The Road”

Charlie doesn't want to go on the road trip because he’s never left philly before, he asks dennis to comfort him about his fears of bad things happening and people being assholes, he eventually freaks out and asks the hitchhiker to drop him back off at the bar

S5e10- “The D.E.N.N.I.S System”

Dennis believes that his manipulation actually makes girls fall in love with him

S6e2- “Dennis Gets Divorced”

Charlie gets real uncomfy when uncle jack tries to hug him

S6e5- “Mac and Charlie: White Trash”

Dennis tries desperately to prove that he’s high class

S6e6- “Mac’s Mom Burns Her House Down”

Charlie’s mom has OCD and Charlie also starts to pick it up

“Why are you doing everything in threes?” “Oh. So Charlie doesn't die.”

“...just playing it safe. She's been doing it. I'm still alive. Can't be crazy” “ It does feel good to do stuff in threes.”

S6e8- “The Gang Gets a New Member”

Dee gets incredibly insecure when she opens the time capsule and hasn't done what she wanted to do when she was a kid

Charlie gets super insecure when he thinks smitty is replacing him

S6e10- “Charlie Kelly: King of the Rats”

Charlie doesn't like leaving the bar and going out into the world

“Dee, I go to a movie or a spaghetti place with you, and out there, I'm the rat.”

Charlie has a panic attack in a sauna

“I'm trapped like a rat, aren't I?” “No, you're not, Charlie.” “ I'm a rat in here! I'm a rat! I'm trapped like a - I gotta get out of here.” “I'm tired of being in weird places, Frank, 'cause I'm trapped like a rat.” Just bash me like a rat! Bash me like a rat and get it over with!”

S6e11- “The Gang Gets Stranded in the Woods”

Charlie has to be knocked out with a sack over his head to be able to go to Atlantic City

“This is why i don’t leave philly alright cause when you leave philly, bad shit happens”

Mac starves himself for chase utley

“If animals have taught me anything it's that you can die at any time very quickly by the side of the road”

S6e12- “Dee Gives Birth”

Dennis yells at a nurse about Dee’s stories like he’s a god

“I will come down on this hospital like the hammer of Thor. The thunder of my vengeance will echo through these corridors like the gust of a thousand winds!”

Dee berates guys until they have sex with her

S7e1- “Frank’s Pretty Woman”

Mac gains a ton of weight and calls it packing on mass

“I went from tiny twink to the muscle bound freak you see before you”

Dennis admits to starving himself and literally constantly working out

“I may look relaxed but im incredibly tense at all times”

S7e2- “The Gang Goes to the Jersey Shore”

Mac knocks carlie out with chloroform to get him to the jersey shore

S7e6- “The Storm of the Century”

Dennis writes a contract for the girls he plans to invite to his rape bunker

S7e7- “Chardee Macdennis: The Game of Games

Mac says that Dee tried to kill herself

S7e10- “How Mac Got Fat”

Charlie gets overwhelmed and goes in the crevice

Mac blames everyone else for making him fat

Dennis does dumb shit because he’s self conscious about getting old and looking bad

“I was just trying to live up to all of your expectations of me” “what expectations?” “physical perfection”

The entire chemical peel scene is a good representation of his mental disorders

S7e12- “The High School Reunion”

Dee tries to be friends with the popular people from school to validate herself

Mac got bullied and dealt drugs in high school

Charlie got bullied in school and huffed glue in the bathroom

“Everyone wants dirtgrub i'll give them dirtgrub okay i'll get high i'll get sad people can laugh at me i hate highschool man”

S7e13- “The High School Reunion Part 2: The Gang’s Revenge”

The entire golden god meltdown

“Its fetish shit i like to bind i like to be bound”

“You would just come around saying shit about being a golden god or some other insane crap and referring to all of us as your minions” “You always acted like you were better than everyone else but then you would just go and hang out with ronnie the rat or dirtgrub under the bleachers”

S8e5- “The Gang Gets Analyzed”

Dennis tries to analyze the therapist

Mac has some real severe mood swings

The therapist talks to him about body dysmorphia

Dennis giving mac “size pills”

Dennis keeps psychology profiles on everyone in the gang, he started dee’s in the 2nd grade

Dee’s entire “tell me i’m good” scene

S8e6- “Charlie’s Mom Has Cancer”

Dennis having trouble feeling throughout the entire episode until the “my mommy’s a skeleton” “i feel to much” scene

Charlie being incredibly overwhelmed the entire episode, (rubbing his head at Dr. Jinx’s, Getting real upset at church)

S8e7- “Frank’s Back in Business”

Dennis pretending to be brian lefevre

“I want you to get off with me” “This is about crawling into another man’s skin”

S8e8- “Charlie Rules the World”

The entire “I Am God” sensory deprivation tank scene

Dennis blowing himself could also be symbolic but it could also just be a bit

S9e3- “The Gang Tries Desperately to Win an Award”

Mac getting really defensive about slight banter “i've had tons of orgasms i've had one with your mom”

S9e5- “Mac Day”

Mac is not okay with being upstaged by country mac when he jumps off the bridge and offers people weed

“there's nothing badass about breaking the law”

S9e6- “The Gang Saves the Day”

Macs fantasy is about everyone admiring his badass karate skills and dennis crying over his dead body saying that he loves him

Dee’s fantasy is about killing every man in the room and finally being appreciated for her acting skills and marrying someone who doesn't call her a bird

Dennis’ fantasy is about surviving a bullet to the head at point blank range and killing his idea of the perfect woman

S9e7- “The Gang Gets Quarantined”

Charlie’s mom got him vaccinated way too often and made him wear bubble boy suits during flu season, Charlie also still has the suits for some reason

“I am in perfect control of my body, if i felt myself getting sick i would simply say SICKNESS BE GONE”

*sustains a perfect G5* “does that sound like a man who needs to be in the hospital”

S10e2- “The Gang Group Dates”

Dennis obsesses over his star rating on a dating app

“I AM A FIVE STAR MAN”

Dee has one night stands with a whole lot of guys that she’s not really into just to give them one star ratings

S10e3- “Psycho Pete Returns”

Dennis does a whole psychopath monologue about skin luggage

“You haven't thought of the smell you bitch”

He gets diagnosed with BPD and gets medication

S10e6- “The Gang Misses the Boat”

Dennis’ whole range rover speech

S10e8- “The Gang Goes On Family Fight”

Dennis breaks down crying because of the buzzer

Dee starves herself to look good for the camera

S10e10- “Ass Kickers United; Mac and Charlie Join a Cult”

Dennis tries to prove that he’s the best at manipulating people

S11e3- “The Gang Hits the Slopes”

Charlie brings up his agoraphobia shit again

“See, this is why I don't like leaving Philly, man. This is nuts.”

S11e4- “Dee Made a Smut Film”

Dennis got raped by a librarian in high school when he was 14

“I was in an older woman that’s cool right?”

S11e9- “The Gang Goes to Hell”

Dee manipulates guys into having sex with her

“So ill insinuate that it would be a shame if my account of what happened was different from his and he got a call from the sheriff”

S11e10- “The Gang Goes to Hell: Part Two”

Charlie has a panic attack about the boat sinking and dennis calms him down

“I knew I shouldn't have come on this cruise. I knew it! I mean, it used to be I would never even leave Philly! And then, you know, you guys drag me to this, you drag me to that, and next thing I know, I-I'm stuck in a box on a sinking ship!”

Dennis keeps onions in his pocket so that he can cry when he needs to

S12e3- “Old Lady House: A Situation Comedy”

Bonnie doing everything in threes so that charlie doesn't die

“I just can't enjoy it when the people being filmed, know they're being filmed”

S12e7- “PTSDee”

Charlie and dennis bonding over their trauma

Dee tries to ruin a guys life bc he said she was his rock bottom

S12e8- “The Gang Tends Bar”

“I have big feelings, and it hurts”

#iasip #It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia #its always sunny #iasip charlie #iasip dennis #iasip mac #mac mcdonald #dennis reynolds #charlie kelly #frank reynolds #Danny Devito #charlie day #Rob McElhenney #kaitlin olsen #dee reynolds #glenn howerton #psychology #nobody cares mia

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bastardssinc · 3 years

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like i get that there are white passing mixed people. i have seen my own fuckin face lol but like. why when most of your characters are already white do you have to make one of your few woc look white? im so tired of dc and just comics in general being so racist. let us have woc that are also gay and not fetishized thanks

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tedfashionski · 4 years

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Finking, Finking.

Hi, welcome to my ted talk. (That is the only time I will ever make that joke. This is Fashionski Finks. Expect radically low standards of self-involved rantiness with zero research or accountability from here on out). For a while there I seriously thought that the covid-19 quarantine was going to result in people being increasingly placid and accepting of creeping extensions of the police state. But here I am, getting depressed again, not about the protests, which I love, but more about my relationship to in-group pressure dynamics. One of the problems with being a relentless contrarian is the discomfort of my impulse to rebel against groups even when they’re championing the right thing. I have to find my own way to fight against the system as an outsider. No gods, no masters, no fucking peer pressure. I’ll never be happy joining a chorus line. I don’t sign fucking petitions (they’re just lists for the NSA). I do donate, but like fuck will I do it performatively. I can’t go to protests cus I get panic attacky in crowds. I empathise pretty strongly with outsiders of all stripes but believe ridiculously excessively in the public good of criticism, and have a nostalgic love of trolling (I like to think I’m gentle with it though). Bring back the troll! We need that fucker, he’s a sign of a healthy internet. I’m writing this blog thing as an extension of my need to vent my extreme negativity. TBH I never expected to get any followers with ted twitter and the bizarre welcomingness of the hf twitter community totally wrongfooted me. I’m not nice. Ted isn’t meant to likable. He’s my dark side. I was meant to be using this alt as a way to terrorise the nice nice (secretly cruel) fashion people. I’m gunna try and up that aspect more. Just bear in mind, my complaints are largely about the system, but if I see you perpetuating fashion’s entrenched anti-intellectualism or its insidery bullshit, I’ll come for you with a little meta-bomb with your name on it. Maintaining my misanthropic tone does take work tho, like, deep down in some twisted part of my psyche, I guess I do actually want to be liked. It’s fucked up.

I suppose it’s only fair to explain this Ted fursona. Like, new concept, who dis? Why all the furry porn? …..because I just think it’s hilarious. Every time I think about the furries I cackle (not at them, mind). I just love the mad corruption of pure Disney aesthetics into hardcore pornography. That’s anti-authoritarian as fuck. I love the sincerity of their culture. The way the crazy fetish aspect means they’ll never be fully blandified by mainstream acceptance. The way it’s so cringe but so delightful. And more seriously, I’m interested in how a culture of mostly gay male nerds developed to the point where they’ll invest 10k in custom fursuits and support eachother’s independent businesses in ways that the fashion community completely fails to do. The fashion world sucks. There’s so many correlations there that I want to investigate: the newness (furries date from around the 70s, fashion culture in its self-aware state dates from the late 19th C – both very young fields); the centralisation/decentralisation; the hierarchy (furries can be pretty catty, I have discovered in my research, and we all know what fashion people are like); the adoption of new identities; the cis-boy gayness aspect (I’m increasingly tired of the extreme nasty hierarchy of certain CSM queens. It’s all very UGH. Just, fuck those particular bitches.) There’s more to the furry love, but I’ll explore it in future posts.

More importantly, why Ted fucking Kaczynski? I’m not like, actually a terrorist. (….yet. tehehe. NO, seriously I like non-maiming violence. Fuck yeah to property damage. Fuck yeah to disabling the system in extreme way. But no to wooden IEDs. Think of my shitty jokes that fail to land as my hand-crafted bombs). I think I like the shitness of Ted. He was just an epic fail of a terrorist. I’m a little white girl living in London. I’m not actually a primitivist, as much as I crave a hut in the woods. I did go to an elite school though. I had some really shitty experiences in the fashion industry in my early 20s, and I watch my friends who are relatively successful in that system and I get so angry on their behalf at their poor treatment. They think I’m too angry. Fuck that. They should be more angry, and the fact that they can’t be angry at their extreme precarity and the fact they’re still insecure and terrified of being ejected by the system after all their investment and skills they’ve built up is BULLSHIT. I’ll be double angry for them, I’m not invested in that system. I don’t need it to pay my rent. I’m free, motherfuckers, and I’m coming for the abusers and exploiters. If you’re a complacent industry figure not fighting hard from within, uggghhhhh fuck you. Yes, YOU. Soooo, I relate pretty hard to the MK ultra stuff. (go look him up, he was basically tortured and experimented upon by the elite). But there’s a pretty big chasm between my views and his, and I’ll try to be clear about the extent of my interest in his extreme beliefs. I haven’t even finished reading the manifesto. Basically, I watched that shitty show on Netflix with sam worthington around the same time I watched Joker (that movie fucked me up) and thought it’d be a good outlet to larp online as a terrorist. There’s the angry white alt-right school shooter aspect, which I’m still figuring out, cus I’m non-binary and I was raised by nutso trumpy right-wingers, who I barely speak to anymore, and I struggle to get along with people generally. There’s sad, self-pitying rage here. I empathise with the angry white dudes too much. I feel guilty about it. That’s good ground for artmaking (yes, shamefully, this…is…art. Sorry). I modelled this fursona a little after my brother, who I spent years living with and arguing with and trying to lift out of his scary racist youtube rabbit holes. This is actually quite an emotional thing for me, cus I did the ‘talk to your fascist family’ thing. And I completely failed. I realised his right-winginess wasn’t lessening, I wasn’t gaining ground, and in fact my excessive empathy and desire to reach out to the relative most similar to me in character meant his extremism was rubbing off on me. Making me more resentful and depressed. Feeling powerless. I was being too kind-hearted and forgiving of his masculine impotence. So I’m exploring some personal shit here. But Ted is also a cute lil fuzzball teddy bear. He means well, but me being super autistic and faily at social skills means he’s kind of a dick, cus I am. I’m going to try and further develop this character, this POV, and this post is the only time I’ll explain the divide between him and his creator (moi). The ‘I’ on the twitter and here is Ted Fashionski, I need that space between me and him. Masks give us this freedom to be more ourselves. Internet culture has lost a lot of its wild brutal anonymity in the last decade or so, now everyone’s afraid of making mistakes. How the hell do you grow if you’re not allowed to fuck up? This is a vital outlet. He’s become an important part of my life and I have to say, I love being Ted Fashionski. He’s like Paddington Bear who just escaped form Guantanamo or something.

I get pretty fatigued as a matter of course. I’m a long-term depressive since childhood. I have a difficult time keeping my hard-on for living. I don’t get suicidal really but I do struggle with extreme fatigue. I sleep a lot. I often fall into spirals of self-hate. And as someone who utterly believes in revolutionary leftist politics, I beat myself up about not doing enough. I’m so middle class and english and white. I was raised in such a chauvinistic and complacent culture; I don’t even know where to start. I’m wading my way through post-colonial literature and beating myself up for finding it boring and uncomfortable. It’s hard to force yourself to acknowledge your culture is The Bad Guys. It’s easier to fall into fanstasies of supremacy and butthurt misunderstoodness. And it’s not like my depressive brain needs any encouragement to hate me. My trajectory is ever leftwards, but I remember the righteous fury of being right-wing. I get it, that was me. We need more paths back from fascism, more comprehension of why people are that kind of shitty. I talk less, and less well, the more depressed I am. If I’m talking, it means im feeling a lot better. Just, fyi.

Give me a minute to be critical here. With the George Floyd protests, a lot of the cool guys on fashion twitter has gone blazingly hardcore on the political side. But there’s this troubling rhetoric about ‘no return to normal content’ or ‘this isn’t the time for fashion’. Like fuck it isn’t. This is a key problem with fashion culture right here, we have this received perception of fashion as empty escapism. Escapism matters in fashion, yes. But seriously, talking about the surfaces of things does not equal not caring about deeper meaning. What the fuck. Clothes are a connective tissue, a membrane between us. They’re emotional and powerful. We can talk about things that matter THROUGH clothes. I speak fashion, pretty fucking well. Most people who work at fashion magazines are morons with no understanding or respect for their subject. They’re incapable of doing it justice, and that’s deliberate. On this tumblr you’ll see rants and reviews of fashion and other artforms, always interpreting through a fashion lens. cus it matters, cus it’s a vital part of the culture, cus just because something has a glittery, seductive surface doesn’t mean it doesn’t communicate or contain depth. There’s no going back to ‘normal fashion content’, yes. Normal fashion content is a fucking psyop to divert legitimate interest in aesthetics amongst largely non-academic dyslexic visual types away from careful thought/feeling and towards empty consumerist commericiality. The traditional fashion media wants you to express yourself and your interest in the zeitgeist through buying more shit. Another fashion world is possible. Let’s destroy the old and build a new one, one where surface and spirit are connected and true and fashion can’t be abused in service of evil industrial monopolists.

/end rant. TLDR: angry fictional teddy bear with tin-foil hat and an eco-anarchist fetish says no to stupid fashion and yes to the renewal of conceptual fashion. Also, Fuck White People.

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s3venpounds · 6 years

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1 - 40

jesus buddy, if you wanted to know more about me just friend me somewhere and talk to me facebook,discord,overwatch,psn, snapchat w.e! haha i dont bite!

also this is gonna be really feckin long

1: Talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie.

How to train your dragon (1 and 2 i can’t decide) I fucking LOVE dragons. the idea to fucking ride one in the sky?!?! fucking DOPE. the idea that theyre also SCALY DOGS?!?!? MOTHER.FUCKING.DOPE. i just associate the idea of freedom with flying through the sky and that feeling was conveyed really well in that movie so i really loved it!

2: Talk about your first kiss.

honestly? kinda dumb now that i look back on it. it was a peck, i wasn’t even like mentally prepared and it happened way faster than i thought. If i knew it was going to happen i would have really like milked that fucker. i woulda went romance movie on that shit with all the extra shit like groping and weird inhaling noises and kissing so hard your teeth almost clink together. but yknow coulda woulda shoulda

3: Talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for.

theyre not a part of my life anymore which admittedly fucking sucks but i think its for the better at least for them. do i wish it worked out and we were together? i mean yeah duh, the reasons i fell for them don’t fucking disintegrate/ i just have more information than i had when i first met that person. will i actually actively pursuit them in the chance to be with them again? hell no. i’m tired. and i’ve seen enough “ self confidence” posts on here to think “ hey if someone really wanted me in their life they would go out of their way to do so and seeing as they haven’t even messaged me in god knows how long then its safe to say theyre off being happy

4: Talk about the thing you regret most so far.

man i haven’t seen this person is literally almost 20 years. I need to apologize. or at the very fucking least, see how theyre been doing. its driving me mad just trying to picture how theyre living and just coming up with a giant question mark.

5: Talk about the best birthday you’ve had.

lets be real bro most of my birthdays have been shit so i gave up on tryna make them memorable or fun, ‘s just another day to me. i mean the best one would have to be this one time i got a gameboy advance but thats pretty much it

6: Talk about the worst birthday you’ve had.

yknow how everyone says “ OH MY GOD WE SHOULD KEEP IN TOUCH” once you move? yeah thats bullshit. honest to god bullshit. i kept tabs on everyone when i moved to a different city and when i came down to visit for my birthday inviting all those people who supposed “wanted to keep in touch with me” literally 1 person showed up. and i think they only showed up because our parents were friends too. so yeah. fuck people sometimes.

7: Talk about your biggest insecurity.

hygiene. breath, hair, clothes, eating habits, manners, anything that might make me come off as unclean to people im trying to impress drives me off the fucking wall. specially at formal events. if im wearing snazzy clothing at like a suite 16 or a debut or a wedding bet you $100 that im adjusting little aspects of my appearance every like 15 seconds. eating mints the second one is finished, trying not to be too close to someones face when talking, even when i fucking fart i always take note of which way the wind is blowing, or im sitting down on something that can absorb the stench, how much pressure is in my gut and how much of it can i let out in small bursts to avoid sound. that or asian dick syndrome. yknow. haha asians got a small dick? that kinda shit bugs me a bit. not a ton but more than i thought it would

8: Talk about the thing you are most proud of.(i am literally only 8 questions in and my fingers are a little sore from typing)

my singing and impressions? i once scared some friends when i imitated a party blower kazoo thingy since the ones they bought from the dollarstore didnt make any sound. same as my singing, i tend to get high scores and i impressed my cousins once with a perfect score on a backstreet boys song HEH

9: Talk about little things on your body that you like the most.

my biceps? theyre not like chris hemsworth level of meaty but like when i worked at this physically demanding job my coworkers are like “ woah dude ur arms are different from mine, if you worked out theyd look so ripped” that kinda stuck with me for a while specially knowing they were a football jock and they had their own special diet and fitness instructor or something. i also like my smile/ jaw shape? my hair can look pretty good too sometimes

10: Talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had.

my family is very passive aggressive oh and racist

11: Talk about the best dream you’ve ever had.

i once had this dream where i had reallllly passionate sex and it felt real and i could feel like every little detail down to like hairs brushing my skin on my arms and shit. i swear to this day it was a modern day succubus or something

12: Talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had.

that dream where i was a bird and flying away from”something” just all my instincts telling me to RUN. or that dream where i got shot in the hand, chest then the head and before i blacked out i said “Ch*****” who incidentally i was going to see later that day which made things very awkward at least for me

13: Talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time.

it was pretty good. looking back i was probably shit in bed hahaha first time so of course theres shit to work out.

14: Talk about a vacation.

hit on by a cousin AND their gay friend. to which the cousin threatened me with self harm but the gay friend took the rejection very easily it was almost baffling in comparison (although the second the settled down they started to bash on me for rejecting their friend) also ate some REALLLLLY garlic covered crab the smell took 5 washes to get out… also got to ride in the back of a truck as its driving at like 120 mph and flying off all these little hills and tracking mud everywhere it was great

15: Talk about the time you were most content in life.

she was in my arms fast asleep and i took a photo. she didnt like that but let me keep the pic so that was nice.

16: Talk about the best party you’ve ever been to.

i can’t really remember any that stand out they were all equally fun. dont get me wrong some were super fun its just that it was also followed by a lot of bad choices that kinda take it down a notch. i will say this one party a friend hosted where i got to meet a BUNCH of new people. i also snorted some fundip powder as a dare. they refuse to let it go so i figure might as well own it. i also landed some sweet shots in beerpong

17: Talk about someone you want to be friends with.

ellen paige would be dope to be friends with. same with zendaya. and gal gadot just so i can like sit in her presence and be in awe for extended periods of time

18: Talk about something that happened in elementary school.

i was cheating on a test and my so called friend ratted me out never talked to him again that white privilege lookin hoe

19: Talk about something that happened in middle school.

i stopped talking to a friend that id thought i would be friends with for my whole life. i also became friends with my current best friend

20: Talk about something that happened in high school.

people are dumb. drama is dumb. people who seek out this kinda shit needa leave me the hell alone. and if youre going to challenge me to a fight, tell me about said fight so i can show up. dont march around telling people ur gonna fight me and not tell me so i dont show up and make it look like i pussied out. like for real?

21: Talk about a time you had to turn someone down.

oh yeah like the vacation one said : shit got really weird. and to have that sorta conversation on spotty wifi in an airport in south korea meaning jet lag is also disorienting af

22: Talk about your worst fear.

death. nuff said

23: Talk about a time someone turned you down.

it sucked but it happens so like.? lmao i dont really know waht to say but it sucked

24: Talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.

i have a horrible memory and on top of that my mind moves at like 32754895274 miles a second so i dont keep stuff in mind a lot in the first place. i can’t really think of anything that had so much impact that i’ve remembered it. well i mean there was this one song a friend told me about in a letter and to this day i’ve kept remembering the same verse “ maybe if we met each other under a different sky maybe things would be much better between you and i”

25: Talk about an ex-best friend.

we just….grew apart. and if we tried to be friends now im sure there would be tension and unease. hes just in a different friend circle. i dont hate him for it i just feel like hes living in a world of white and im living in a world of black like its just plain and simple

26: Talk about things you do when you’re sick.

on the computer. i can’t rest when im sick. i just keep trudging along. school, work, hangouts, i still go. i just take precautions to not spread it

27: Talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body.

neck? shoulder? hands? face? hair? idk dood i don’t really like specific places more of how WELL those parts can mesh together to make this beautiful being.

28: Talk about your fetishes.

y’all about to learn some shit because im gonna teach you a thing about me. pov’s, deepthroat/gagging, emo/goth, anal, massage, ropes and power trips, asians, tentacles if im feeling kinky, hentai /cartoon shit, glory holes, dirty talk and asmr (who woulda thought theres porn for that huh?), ahegao(being fucked silly or till your mind breaks into being nothing but a cumdump), swallowing, threesomes, double penetration, latex is pretty cool too, cosplays are nice if the characters are ones i recognize, tittyfucks, source film maker porn of like video game characters are getting pretty professional nowadays, lesbian, orgys, teenage girls and old ass guys, horse dicks and girls who try to take em, i got turned on by a girl fucking a dog once so i guess bestiality is a thing, oh i saw this scene in a movie im not sure if it was real it seems kinda hazy but it involved necrophilia but im not sure if it turned me on or it was so weird i’ve memorized it because of how weird it was. chicks with dicks fucking other chicks. and a plethora of other weird shit. i dont know what fetishes count and what doesn’t so i just listed whatever came to mind as i wrote have fun with that shit

29: Talk about what turns you on.

short hair, asian heritage, playful and lighthearted but can be lustful as all hell, shorter than me, big boobs is a plus, mid driffs, underboob, small frame or face, scent( god if you smell good thats instant brownie points with me), likes anime, high pitch voices are cute as hell, very physically intimate, loves PDA’s, yeah i can’t really think of much

30: Talk about what turns you off.

uhh smells bad?, when their personality is bland/boring, or just shit. over timidness i get being shy but like if you can’t trust that the person youre interested in then like what am i supposed to do. i literally dated a girl who was so sheepish all i could do was ask her yes or no questions. and honestly that got old really fucking fast. i get she was trying but like i can only finesse so much of a relationship man. bad hygiene holy fuck. if you got like ear wax showin our ur ears, or like a bleeding pimple in plain view and refuse to at least dab it with a wet cloth or tissue then pls its not gonna work out. dandruff oh my gOD. dandruff would drive me nuts. like if i get close enough to see individual fucking flakes im gonna tear my whole scalp off

31: Talk about what you think death is like.

i feel like our bodies stop responding but our “souls” are still present there trapped screaming and trying to move our body but can’t. and thats why burials and shit sound so terrifying

32: Talk about a place you remember from your childhood.

dont need to. im a couple blocks away i can visit it any time. (my elementary and middle school the neighbourhood surrounding it was also where i used to live so that was dope)

33: Talk about what you do when you are sad.

i force myself to get MORE sad so i can get it all out in one go and much faster. like how the human mind can only get so angry that the brain gives up and just tries to find another way to spend its time.

34: Talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured.

when i was a kid me and bunch of other kids decided to clog a slide with just a shit ton of people and one of my friends who came after me kept pushing me to the point i was hanging on for dear life using only my knee down that was wedged between a fat kid and my friend who went after me. i fell off eventually knocking skulls with another kid near the end of the slide(this slide was shaped like a spring so that explains why there were kids under me) my arm bend backwards for a sec after hitting another kid’s legs, and then i fell chest and fast first on the asphalt winding myself. kids are rugged as all hell man they can really take a hit. i walked it off but god damn if i didnt get bruises and shit afterwards. or that time i got beaten so bad by father dearest because work was stressful and i ended up blacking out. wasn’t even allowed to go to the hospital. just kinda laid down in my room with bruises all over.

35: Talk about things you wish you could stop doing.

relying on people for happiness. distracting myself from sadness and responsibilities. procrastinating in general

36: Talk about your guilty pleasures.

i dont really feel guilt save for some specific circumstances. ask any of my friends. does that mean im a sociopath or whatever?

37: Talk about someone you thought you were in love with.

they just got out of a relationship with someone and was avoiding them profusely and i just started to get to know them. we got to the point that when she was ready we could date. little did i know that later, she would end up dating a friend of mine. to which i promptly had the appropriate reaction of crying myself to sleep, sending that friend a text message with all the things he should know to keep that girl happy and ultimately smashing a lot of things (some bottles actually because we were gonna build a sculpture or something together with em. man middle school was a fucking RIDE)

38: Talk about songs that remind you of certain people.

mmmmmm i would prefer to keep those underwraps.

39: Talk about things you wish you’d known earlier.

family will be there for you in the end. (not because they want to but because the world teaches them that they have to meaning they will help just in their own way and to their own ends.) friends come and go. they always have always will. anyone who says forever is a fuckin idiot. lovers come and go thats just a natural part of growing up. and lets be real all the people that said they would self harm ultimately never did so dont stress it so much god damn(but dont let it slide either)

40: Talk about the end of something in your life.

how about the end of my interest in anime and video games. nothing seems to really interest me anymore. everything is just kinda “meh”

#ask me shit #its fun to tell people way more shit than they wanted

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therealchampagnemamii · 7 years

Text

An (Ongoing) Open Letter to White RPers and Admins

Yo,

Before I start I just wanna say that this letter is actually not for you, it’s for me. It’s a way for me to outwardly process and share my thoughts on my experience being a poc roleplayer. I also want to say that just because I am one, does not mean I speak for all and will do my best to stick to ‘I’ statements when necessary.

Anyway.

A few months ago I left an RP after countless incidents having to do with race and gender that just really got to me. I did my best to work with admins, to talk to other roleplayers but in the end it wasn’t enough to make me want to stay and I felt like I was talking to a wall. At 22, roleplaying for me is just as much of an escape as it was when I was 15, I just have a full time job now and am more conscious and aware of the world around me and the body that I occupy. As a roleplayer, it’s always interesting to see who is and is not allowed that kind of escape that so many of us aim for through our writing. Many times in this rp I got the repeated response of “Well if you choose to focus on those issues, that’s up to you and we respect that but we can’t ask that of all our players. Some people just want to escape the real word.” AKA This is rp and we want to pretend like racism and race don’t exist. Even worse is that I felt too intimidated to speak up in the ways I really wanted to because I felt alone and because I felt like maybe I should just be enjoying my charas as is. I loved my connections with people, I liked where my characters were going but I couldn’t ignore the things that were going on. But I spoke up only at certain times but now I’m saying FUCK THAT SHIT.

I don’t need to call out people directly because I don’t need that mess and I’m not interested in having a back and forth with folks who I know are not ready to break open their mind and consider that they could be wrong. And I don’t need to call you out, y’all know who you are. And it’s not just this rp it’s COUNTLESS rp’s that do problematic shit. Like the rp I was in that wanted to have a sadie hawkins dance (where the girls ask the boys out) yet there are queer and non-binary characters in the rp. Or like when that bomb went off in chelsea last year and some rp I was in decided to let characters post starters and talk about it like they were affected cause the rp was set in NYC.

THE LIST GOES ON and ON

But my particular focus is on the topic of race and the marginalization of roleplayers of color and characters/fcs of color. Do you have any idea how disheartening it is to look at an app count in an OC roleplay and see that out of all of the ten applications not a single one is a poc fc? Do you know how disheartening it is to watch people eagerly accept plots with my cis white dude fc and not any of my fcs of color ESPECIALLY black women? Do you know how fucked up it is to have people view your complaints as you making too big of a deal? Do you know how frustrating it is to have countless white roleplayers use quotes from songs by poc artists for their blogs and appropriate language only to have their character not talk to a single character of color in the rp? Do you know what it’s like to play a black character and have someone consistently fetishize biracial babies? Do you know what it’s like to watch people play latinx characters and continuously describe them as “spicy”or pretend like they can’t speak english? Do you know what it’s like to watch someone (most likely a non-black and/or non-poc) act like a black fc can’t fit for a super smart, Harvard bound socialite character? Do you know what it’s like to watch people cast white people with a tan as latinx characters? Do you know what it’s like to watch various communities of color be typecasted again and again for roleplays? Do you even know it’s happening???

Y’all I’m tired. I’m tired of shit S H I T. I spend everyday dodging old white dudes on the train on my way to work, the last thing I need when I sign on for my “escape” is for some white person telling me that my feelings are invalid or that you don’t have room for poc fcs when you’ve literally created a character for every crusty white man who has the same first name. IM TIRED, man. Why don’t I get the same luxury to escape as all of y’all? Why is it SO HARD for you to go to google and do a search on what it means to be intersectional and inclusive?

Those are all rhetorical questions, btw, I know the answers and you do too. There’s a lot more that I wanted to say but I got too frustrated so the bottom line is:

If you’re finding it hard to be inclusive of people of color in your roleplay then you need to dig deep and do some reflection and realize that yes, you are inherently racist, yes you were born into a world that is inherently racist but there comes a point where you become explicit in your own ignorance, racism and prejudice.

Wake the fuck up and read a book.

#text post #idk what to tag this but i needed to vent hardcore #open letter

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hxrryspotter · 7 years

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I think, while mental illness and homosexuality are important topics, it's still necessary for people to realise that the show is super white, and not perfect. There was a running joke amongst swedes that "it's surprising that they managed to cast so many POC's" because Norway take in so few immigrants (compared to Sweden). Jokes aside, the representation might be accurate for Norway, but obv I can't tell because I live in Sweden. But it's still important to acknowledge and be upset about. >>

Talking about Isak and Even being "white boys" is just stating facts. They are both white and that is an issue. Let's be honest with ourselves, we have seen white gay boys on film before. So that is not as revolutionary as for example Moonlight. That had almost never been depicted in that way before. And people did not react the same way with that movie, a huge fandom did not blow up and people did not write hundreds fanfics about them. It's so interesting.>>

I’m not saying that Even and Isak are a horrible couple (it’s actually scary how accurately it told a story that is almost identical to one of my friends and his boyfriend). Both parts of this discussion need to realise that while this story might be comforting to bi people (though Even is not confirmed to be bi), or people who are dealing with mental illness, the whiteness is REAL to put it frankly, and people are less keen on a black, gay couple.

That's all I had to say, sorry for ramling.

im really really tired. really tired. no ones saying that skam is the most diverse show they’ve ever seen and if they do then that’s their ignorance not mine. i can list at 4 shows with a more diverse cast than skam.

i know they’re white, that’s their skin color. the only problem is was that op making it sound like isak and even are just two regular white boys in a mlm relationship and how unrealistic it is for sana to confide in even. call them white? they are white. (and so are the girl squad besides sana - which some people got really angry at us for pointing right back. calling it lesbophobia which is really hypocritical bc isnt them being white... a fact? an observation?) but dont start erasing the shit they went through that also makes them a minority like sana. they all get discriminated against in this world, for sure at different levels of severity and completely different situations but the three of them know how it feels. but especially even and sana. and yeah - there’s heaps of fetishizers in this fandom but i dont appreciate when people come at me like i am one when they clearly haven’t been on my blog for very long. i’d love isak x even x sana scenes but honestly? i want sana x even scenes much more. and i want nothing fucking more than for the girl squad to realize how sana is feeling and they can all become much closer after it.

its’ so interesting bc it’s racism. bc a lot of white people just aren’t as interested in black lives lets be real hey. i was at dinner the other night with a couple friends and we were talking about shows. they mentioned all the most common popular netflix ones but when i asked them abt the get down and dear white people they looked at me like’ what are you talking about, never heard of them??’ its shitty but that’s reality and its gross af. but you know what?

do you think i related to dear white people? i watched it all in two days, i loved it so much i wanna recommend it to everyone. but i dont relate to the characters? my skins white.so what i dont like is when some people in this fandom act incredibly rude bc some of us really stan even and an even x sana friendship. if you go to my blog and look up my tags for the posts i make, i care just as much about sana and her wellbeing right now and it lowkey fuckin hurts when people just throw words at me like ‘islamophobe’ and racist when im..... not. when i fucking care about all this stuff, when yall dont even actually know me. i dont want a fucking medal, i dont want pity. i dont want anything besides for people not to send me hate or tell me im a fake who can go choke. even you sending this msg its like. you’re trying to educate me but you’re saying things i’ve already said weeks ago... im just tired. i wanna enjoy this show but i can not for the life of me not say shit or not express that i want a sana x even friendship. it doesnt mean i hate the girls, lmao i adore them. i lost track of where i was going but yeah. that’s all i guess.

#long post #sorry #daf answers #anonymous

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