#if he exorcists turned into the GUARDIANS of hell

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

*grabs the Vanguard Vaggie idea and scuttles back under her goblin rug*

OKAY BUT

Imagine, like after they retreat back to heaven, the other exorcists...start talking. They start talking *behind Lute's back*.

At first it's pain and bitterness and betrayal at Vaggie fighting them. 'How could she do this? How could she hurt us?!'

Then, maybe during some hit and run nonsense that Lute has them doing, the conversation shifts. They start noticing that Vaggie doesnt go for the kill unless she has to. Doesn't maim. She always gives them the chance to run, to go home... And they start talking. They talk about those better times with the Vanguard. They wonder aloud why she fights for hell. And maybe, just maybe, they talk about how they miss her. They miss Vaggie. They miss having that feeling of her looking out for them.

I wonder how long it might take for one of them to linger. To lower their weapon. To take off their mask.

Even then, it takes a long time for the first exorcist to *stay* after they should have retreated. For them to ask for a place to stay. But as more and more start to come to Vaggie, to the *Vanguard*, and ask for a home...charlie cant help but be grinning as she holds Vaggie's hand.

ayyyyeeeeeee!!!!

what if there was that slooooow realization that when Vaggie was around, their vanguard, they all felt more like a team together. she liked things done Right and done Well- wasn't bothered with competing- took training and exterminations Seriously- kept them all sharp sure but also turned something that was just Adam's shits and giggles, just a GAME, into a purpose and a duty again. something to be proud of and do their BEST at (while still having fun)

so yeah when Adam and Lute come back with her halo saying she's sided with hell, betrayed them all, damned herself and gets to rot there with them- there's that anger. oh they HATE her for doing that-

because they miss her

and things were better, they all felt better, when she'd been around, and that's gone now and it's her fault

or adam and lute say so anyway

can you IMAGINE in this au, the shift when Lute 1v1s Vaggie... and doesn't come back to heaven with her head?? DOESN't beat her? and Adam's DEAD?

and so are so many of them actually- dead exorcists that vaggie helped kill, that vaggie helped fight off

why?

three years her being in hell and she'd never fought any of them or hurt any of her sisters when they came flying down- (and she COULD have) (used to be one of the BEST after all) it's only when they're sent after her HOME that she fights, almost as if-

as if killing isn't what she wants to do anymore, if she can help it

thats. not the same as turning against them. not the same as her siding with hell- even so lute and adam still wanted her dead, and even then, she'd let lute LIVE...

is that weakness and betrayal?

but she's not weak, if lute couldn't kill her. and she never killed any of them until they came after her. is that still betrayal?

or is it something else

is there anything kind of betrayal here. are they on the wrong side of it...

im not sure, if any of them would take off a mask willingly- risk hell-

i KNOW that even ONE moment of hesitation would get lute turning on them, just like she did with vaggie- worse maybe, now very aware of the danger of letting fallen angels live- HER mistake, not killing vaggie when she had the chance all those years ago

and if a wounded and abandoned exorcist staggered to the gate's of the hazbin hotel? if some of her other sisters went looking for her- KNOWING this time what the supposed 'betrayal' and 'sin' had been?

(a moment of hesitation)

(before one of them drops her weapon to knock on the hotel door)

yeah. they'd find charlie running to help them inside. probably already pulling out bandages- a demon with first aid gear in her pockets, always carried just in case, nothing like they were expecting-

they'd find their Vangaurd waiting there too, having gone ahead and made things safe for them to follow, just like always

that'd be pretty sweet

#hazbin hotel #vaggie #exorcist angels hazbin hotel #vangaurd vaggie au idea thingy #. #my eyes are crossing im half asleep and thiss has hurt #thank uuuuuu #yeeeee #wouldn't it be funny #if he exorcists turned into the GUARDIANS of hell #not #not because they like hell #but vaggie made them feel like they were doing ssomething important- keeping heaven safe- protecting angels- #not just #having fun serving up torment and death to sinners #and #if a sinner can become an angel #then #where does an exorcist owe their loyalty ? #the ones tellign them to kill souls that could be under their protection someday- #or the one who wants it to stop #who wants heaven to be what it was supposed to be #and wont fight for it otherwise #hmmm #heh #if sera tries getting ride of them all as a PR move #sends them to hell and doesn't open up a way back- get lute away- the last shameful reminder of her deal with adam gone #where would the exorcists go? #now that hell KNOWS they can be killed- where could they go to find safety? #hmmmmmmm

[remember-the-fanfics]

Hai, so um I really like the Gen-Z overlord Reader, bc well they are basically me, if you are able/want to can you make some possible angst headcanons? Like how they miss home or their friends

Just Before the pilot episode

I'm trying so hard to have a timeline, everything is connected! I just have it in no order.

This is shorter than usual.

• You would have so many things to be sad about

• Like how you could never live your life before you died

• Missing all your friends because they'll (hopefully) get to grow old

• Your family grieving over your life being taken to soon.

• Older sibling never got to see you truly become an adult without your parents

• Younger sibling missing you, who just got them in a way where they could annoy you but you would still protect them afterwards.

• Parents/Guardian losing their child way to soon.

• You usually avoid those thoughts, having to do be someone strong daily for the people you protect.

• You already had time to mourn the future you never got and everyone you miss when you weren't an Overlord.

• So pushing your grief all the way down inside to never see the light of day.

"Haha, nope."

• Until you seeing or smell something like home and it hits you, hard.

• Then you're back being a child, who just wants their parents to comfort them from a nightmare.

• You're with Angel Dust, Vaggie, and Charlie. Doing an exercise that Charlie ropped you into.

• When something of the moment of true trust reminds you of home.

• The last place it was completely given so freely.

• Angel Dust nugges you saying it was your turn again.

• Before realizing you had tears that started stream down your face.

• He tried to cheer you up with a joke

"Didn't think the exercise was that bad."

• Didn't work for the most part.

• You were laughing, while crying. Creepied him out and got the others attention.

• You just wanted to go home, back to the people you care about.

• But you could never go back, you were dead.

• Why does it feel so unfair that you died before you actually got to live.

• Getting up while everyone was asking you if you were alright

"Ha ha, no."

• Heading to your room because you didn't want to drag everyone else's mood down with you.

• Only to be stop by Angel Dust, who knows how you feel about missing your family but not understanding that your grief about missing your life.

"I didn't get to live my life, Angel! I died less than two months after I turned 18, I still lived with my parents! My family and friends had to bury me, I have to wait while everyone I know get to live."

• Angel Dust did not know you were that young.

• This is the first time most of them saw you be more than just chaotic.

• Heading to your room to be alone finally

• After you got your emotions back inside because you are still needed by many people.

• Avoided Charlie for awhile because she wanted you to talk about your feelings

• Then Vaggie when Charlie got sad about it.

• You stayed away from the hotel for a week, wanting stayat your territory for the extermination any way.

• Texts Charlie and Vaggie, that you would be back afterwards.

• Charlie texting you about an interview she has the day after.

• Vaggie texts you to stay safe until then.

• Missing your family from life and realizing that you made your own type of family-friendship in hell.

• Not having time to process it when you see an explosion from a far and you know who would be there and rushing there to make sure they'll be okay.

-

And that leads you into the whole being there when Carmilla killed an exorcist.

#hazbin angel dust #hazbin hotel x reader #platonic hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #hazbin vaggie #genz reader #not that angsty but i tried

[markeronacomputer]

Guardian Demon (A Fic That I Started But Will Never Finish In Time For Episode 8)

So after I made that protective big bro Alastor essay, I wrote a little thing about how the season finale’s final big fight’s ending could potentially go. After losing the motivation to write it, I realised that if I don’t post it now, I’ll never get it done in time for Episode 8’s release, so… here’s it is, everyone!

***

Guardian Demon

The skies of the Pride Ring were being painted grey by unnaturally-coloured (for Hell) storm clouds: a sure sign that the Exterminator’s unending wrath had descended upon Hell.

But this time, their target wasn’t simply the sinners. No, now, they were directing the bulk of their power onto the Hazbin Hotel, and all the filthy little irredeemable pricks inside who dared defy the way things were.

And oh boy, was it going to be a massacre.

The little shits had managed to hold their ground for a surprisingly long time, but the tide turned eventually. It had to, of course. No demon stood a chance against Adam and his exorcist army: this had happened enough times that they knew that well.

And despite some admittedly great efforts, not even Charlie Morningstar lasted that long.

Or at least, that was the way things seemed.

Beaten and bloody, Charlie lay on the ground, aching from a broken horn as she could do nothing but stare up in horror at her demise. Her failure. The downfall of the Fallen One’s daughter.

Screams ran out on the battlefield for her, her friends doing the best they could to rush to her aid. But none of them would be fast enough, of course. No lowly sinner in all of Pride could be faster than lightning itself.

“See you in Double Hell, bitch!” Adam cackled, raising his guitar as it crackled with holy electricity, and was about to ram it into the girl’s head before he was distracted by something… big.

“D̸̛̹O̷̩͛N̸͕͗’̶͈̉T̴̤̎ ̸̱̏Ȳ̴̗O̵͙̕U̵̱͒ D̷̛̗͎̲̠̮̍͗̃̓̉̒͆̾A̷̹̺͇̤̺̻͐̇̒Ř̸̩̘̱̙̀̐̏̊͋͊Ḝ̴͍̺̰̤͕̒ T̶͖͠Ö̵̰Ȗ̵̩C̴̡͠H̵̳̚ ̴͚̈́H̶̃ͅE̴̲͌R!”

Wait… who was that? Not Vaggie, and not Lucifer… he certainly hadn’t heard that voice before. Adam turned to the source of the noise, a small “wait, huh?” escaping his mouth… before it briefly fell open.

Before him was a gargantuan creature with hooves instead of feet, approaching at an alarming rate despite the clumsiness that would come with said hooves and such a hunched body. It was wearing a dark red suit, or what was left of one as it was now torn to bits, fur sticking out of several holes in it like the stuffing of a ruined doll.

Its hands- no, more accurately, claws- were dirty and bloodstained, its face decorated by a crown of antlers and a mask of a deer’s skull… no, that wasn’t a mask. That was its face.

Because it had to be its face. If it was a mask, then why was there blood pouring from its radio dial-like eyes like tears? And if it was a mask… then why was there so many long, yellow, razor-sharp teeth?

He was so busy taking in its appearance that it took him a second to remember that it was coming towards him. Lute flew by his side, readying her spear to take the creature down, but it wasn’t enough to stop it. It would never have been enough.

“OH, SHI-“

That was all Adam got out before his world was wrapped in darkness and an indescribable pain.

***

Charlie couldn’t believe what she was seeing. She could hardly process the fact that she was just on death’s door to begin with, but now, Alastor- or rather, the thing that vaguely looked like Alastor if she squinted- had just ran up to the man who almost killed her and ate him and his second-in-command in one snap of his jaws.

When its jaws opened a second later, she got the tiniest glimpse of Adam scrambling to get out before they snapped shut again. A deep, distorted breath came from its singular skeletal nostril as its eyes narrowed, confirming the obvious fact that, unlike the many other times that Alastor had cannibalised someone, this wasn’t just him playing with his food.

Then his neck snapped, and grew longer and longer before seamlessly spinning in a circle over and over again in an action that seemed both disorienting and painful at the same time before letting go, opening his mouth and catapulting a bright yellow glow enveloped in green smoke- along with a smaller grey object, also enveloped in green smoke- into the distance.

A loud explosion encompassed by the small hum of static echoed in their ears as Adam and Lute landed smack-dab in the middle of Pentagram City: far, far away from the hotel.

Then, after they could process what they just saw but before anyone could react, the cavalry arrived. A familiar, ominous call came from the skies above as a great, golden, six-winged duck flew ahead, right into the heart of the chaos.

Still aching from the pain of a broken horn- and that wasn’t even mentioning everything else that just happened, Charlie grinned weakly, on the verge of tears. “Thanks, Dad.”

A distorted, staticky roar came from the being before her before its skeleton snapped, Alastor’s suit sewing itself back together as he shrank back to his normal appearance and size.

His voice having also returned to normal (well, normal for him), Alastor turned to Charlie, a look of concern on his usually unreadable face before he looked to the others behind her.

They all shared the same shocked, confused expression.

Maybe it was because they just saw Alastor really go all-out for the first time.

Maybe it was because he was able to take out the Exterminator’s leader and his second-in-command so easily when he did so.

Or maybe it was because for the first time since… ever, really, Alastor’s trademark smile had mysteriously vanished.

Alastor was expressing genuine fear, in front of them. No sinner in Hell had ever had that privilege before: not to their knowledge, at least.

However, it was a privilege they only had for a few seconds before he realised his mistake, a staticky noise coming from him as his mouth twitched upward. Struggling to explain himself, Alastor stammered for a few seconds before sighing and disappearing.

They were speechless at that. Finally, after what felt like an hour but was really just 20 seconds, they could take in all of the things that just happened.

“Okay, if no one else is gonna say it…” Angel trailed off. “WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED?!”

***

So this is the part in the fic where it cuts to Alastor internally giving himself shit for giving a shit about anyone there, and then Charlie shows up and they have an awkward conversation that somehow spirals into Al being a good brother figure again.

But I never wrote that part. It’s why I posted it here.

Anyways, hope you liked it!

#hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fic #hazbin hotel episode 8 #theory fic #Hazbin hotel charlie #marker’s tumblr ficlets

[kathyprior4200]

Adam The Exorcist

I: Genesis

 In the beginning, there was nothing. So, God created some shit. (Namely the Heavens and the Earth).  

 On the first day, God declared, “Let there be Light!” And there was light. And God saw the light and that it was good and divided the light from the darkness. And He called the light Day and called the dark Night. God often wore a large white top hat and white suit and tailcoat that sparkled with diamonds and gems. A gold Christian Cross was on His hat, and He carried a gold scepter that could help move the cosmos. He wore a sky-blue undershirt and gold bow tie. In place of His face was a large glowing white light with an eyeball appearance. On occasion, eyes would appear on His clothing and around Him in the air, allowing Him sight in all directions.

 Asherah was God’s loving wife, who was present with Him. She had beautiful brown skin, long black curly hair and wore elaborate robes of midnight blue with designs of stars, trees, and flowers on it. Her face was often hidden behind a white veil, and She ruled over the sea and all of nature after they were created. She was also an extension of the Tree of Life.

 On the second day, God said, “Let there be sky and let the sky and waters divide.” And it was so. And God called the sky Heaven. God then made the hierarchy of Angels: the fiery worshipping Seraphim (Holy, Holy, Holy), the many-faced Cherubim guardians, the eye-covered wheel Thrones of justice, the Dominions of churches and leaders, the miracle Virtues, the warrior Powers, the Principalities, Archangels and Angels. (God also made the Cherubs, which are different from the Cherubim, and the Exorcists, who didn’t come until after man’s fall).

 God’s Archangels were Michael, Raphael, Uriel, Azrael, Ariel, Gabriel, Zadkiel, Camael, Samael, Metatron, Sandalphon, Jophiel, and his favorite angel, Helel/Lucifer, whose name means “Light-Bearer/Morning Star”. (Helel also has the word “Hell” in it, for foreshadowing). Helel/Lucifer would play divine music for God on a variety of instruments: harps, lyres, fiddles, pipes, accordions, timbrels, trumpets, and many others. He also was a great singer and would frequently perform polka songs. (God liked all kinds of music, provided they were performed by talented artists and done with good intentions). Lucifer’s six wings would emulate different colored flames, creating a show of rainbow fire to entertain God and the denizens of Heaven. Lucifer’s words were so heartwarming and divine, that even when he sang a silly song about rubber ducks one time, his audience cried tears of awe. He was the Prince of the Seraphim Choir after all as well as the most talented musician among his angelic siblings. Even his siblings were entranced by his melodies.

 Lucifer was indeed, the most powerful and beautiful angel of them all and was God’s second in command. He had pale white skin, red cheeks, short blonde hair, and onyx black eyes (before his serpentine eyes in Hell). He often carried a scepter with him with a diamond sphere at the top. (This was before the red apple). When he was in Heaven, Lucifer had six gigantic white-gold feathery wings of light and often wore a white robe with a dark blue fancy “L” on the front. When not wearing the robe, he would adorn a white suit and tailcoat with gold trim and a gold bowtie with matching white pants and stylish black shoes. He also had a white top hat. Six white wings came from his back (before they had turned black and full of eyes in Hell). Lucifer praised God and himself in his song as God watched on His golden throne, appearing as an eye in a white sphere of light. Along with entertaining God with his music, Lucifer also used his powers to weave the cosmos, brighten stars, and bring life to barren planets, hence his name “Morning Star.” Venus the planet, named after the most beautiful Roman goddess, also bore the same title, Morning Star, for this star shines brightest when it rises on Earth.  

 Soon it was the third day and God said, “Let the waters be under heaven and let dry land appear.” And it was so. And God called the waters the sea and the land the Earth. God said, “Let the Earth grow grass, let the plants yield seeds, and the seeds bear fruit, whose seed grows in the Earth.” And it was so.

 On the fourth day, God said, “Let there be lights in the heavens to divide the day from the night. Let there be stars, suns, seasons, and days.” And it was so. And God made the greater light He called the Sun and the lesser light He called the Moon.

 On the fifth day, God said, “Let there be creatures of life from the sea and fowl to fly above the Earth.” So, amphibians, fish, and birds were made. God blessed them saying, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the seas and Earth.”

 On the sixth day, God said, “Let the Earth bring forth living creatures, beasts, insects, cattle and animals.” And it was so. God said, “Let us make man in our image and our likeness.” And God said to man, “Be fruitful and multiply. For you shall have dominion over the fish in the sea, the fowls in the air, and every living thing that moves upon the Earth.” And it was so.

 The evening and morning of the seventh day was the day of rest.

 At least temporarily.

II: God’s Grand Creation

 God rested a while, but then wanted to share His surprise with His family. He downed His gold chalice of Cloud Nine Wine, excited to share His Good News to the public.  

 “Hey,” called a figure named Jesus Christ, telepathically. He was a kind-hearted being with long brown hair, a beard and wore robes of red. However, He wasn’t corporeal yet and was still very much a part of God’s mind. “I’m part of the Good News, yes?”

 God chuckled. “Your story is later, my ‘Son.’ Your time will come.”

 “When you say, ‘Son,’” Jesus asked, “It means I’m your real son, right? You know, you’re my real Father? The one who spends time with me and…maybe one who’s not so busy all the time…?”

 “You are my ‘Son’…an extension of me,” said God. “In a way, everyone is my divine offspring. You’re just the most popular and one of the most powerful.”

 “So…can I be fully born now?”

 “Not yet. Go talk to your mother.”

 “Mother Mary or Asherah?”

 God sighed, hand on his face. “Just…stop looking at the future. It’s not like you’ll remember much if you decide to take on physical form.”

 Jesus sighed and retreated with his Divine Dove companion.

 God later called His angelic children and denizens of Heaven for a grand meeting after a feast of a lunch. Gabriel played trumpets to help with the announcements. Fiery Seraphim sang and flew above the stage. There was a drumroll and a huge cheer as God strolled onto the platform, his scepter twirling in his hand. Helel/Lucifer played his music as several female angel dancers danced on stage, with God in the middle. The music was a combination of a church choir and a 1960s groove. God sang His welcoming song as the six identical “gracettes” ladies posed on either side of God. The crowd applauded and the dancers left the stage.

 “Thank you, thank you,” God said with a bow. “Nothing like starting up our meetings with a musical number! Sponsored by Popsie-Viv Cinema, living the good life.”

 Jesus reappeared above God, speaking through His mind, and shaking His head. “’Stop looking at the future.’ Says the one who cruises in gold Cadillacs, wears fancy 1900s clothing and dances to music that hasn’t even been invented yet.”

 “I’m God. Now shush!” God responded telepathically, covering Jesus’ face with a cloud.

 Lucifer put his accordion away and rolled his eyes in the background as he joined his siblings.

 “I have an important announcement to make,” He said, as He posed on a golden platform. The angels stood in a vast chamber and surrounded God in a semi-circle. Behind God was a holographic screen that displayed the newly created planet Earth. The screen was flanked by red theater curtains. The open sky around them was pastel pink, blue, and gold with fluffy clouds that looked like cotton candy. Gold Greek pillars stood for decoration.

 The angels bowed politely before God continued. “Behold, the Earth! My creation of Earth has been a marvelous success. Trees, grass, plants, fruits, and vegetables flourish on the land. The fish and dolphins and sea creatures swim in delight in the oceans, rivers, lakes, and seas. Birds, eagles and flying creatures soar through the skies and around mountains. And mammals, reptiles and land creatures are thriving in a variety of environments.” God waved His scepter and movie scenes of colorful fish and animals and birds flashed to life like a live documentary. All the angels “oohed” and “ahhed,” and clapped. Asherah stood gracefully by God’s side, wearing a teal dress with aquamarine gems sparkling from it. A silver crown adorned Her head of dark curly hair.

 “What are some of the most remarkable things you see here?” God asked. The angels leaned in for a closer look. “And don’t just say the sun or the moon. What on the Earth do you like about my work?”

 “Look at those beautiful trees and flowers!” Archangel Jophiel exclaimed. “They are so colorful and they help all the animals.” She had flowers in her long blond curly hair and on her pastel rainbow dress. A “J” was shown on front of her outfit.

 “Those lions look so strong and brave,” added Archangel Michael. He had short blonde hair, blue eyes, red cheeks, pale skin, and a fit physique. He looked like Lucifer’s twin and always carried a sword. He wore white and blue military garb with a dark blue fancy “M” on the top. Michael added, “Lions. So graceful, yet so loving. I appreciate our Lord’s fine work! Oh, did I mention that those new little round blue fruits are delicious?” He grinned.

 “Blueberries,” added Uriel to Michael. “That’s what they’re called.”

 “I love those berries of blue!” Michael manifested some and popped them into his mouth.

 An angel with long black hair, black wings, pale skin, red cheeks, and wearing a black suit said, “I like the dark caves and the insects. And the mysteries of the various weather patterns. One storm can just knock everything back. A constant reminder of our Father’s mighty power.” A scythe was sheathed by his side among black feathery wings. An onyx ring glinted on his finger. He looked like he wanted to be alone instead of at the mandatory meeting.

 “Azrael likes death and dark stuff,” Gabriel whispered to Uriel after he finished. “Don’t ask.” Gabriel combed his fingers through his dark blonde hair, sunlight glinting off his golden robe with a dark fancy “G” on it. “I personally love the creatures that communicate and send messages, like me.”

 Raphael had dark brown hair, pale skin, red cheeks, and wore teal-green robes made of leaves, an “R” on the front. “Our brilliant Heavenly Father has created herbs and plants for healing! Nothing is better than receiving the loving touch of one’s fellow plants. This will help tremendously in my studies.”

 “You really are Heaven’s best healer,” Uriel mentioned to Raphael, her robes silver with a “U” on the front. “I think I’ll just stick to my philosophy and star-gazing.” She turned to the front. “Yes, I love God’s stars and knowledge best of all.”

 “And all the friendships of the animals,” added Camael.

 “Hey, Helel!” Michael called, elbowing his brother. “What’s your favorite thing?”

 Helel/Lucifer smiled after a long pause. “To me, nothing on Earth is better than snakes, apples…and ducks!”

 Michael, Gabriel, Raphael, and Uriel paused for a beat, then burst into laughter.

 “What?” Lucifer asked with a shrug, straightening his white top hat. “Apples are the most delicious fruit on the Earth islands. Though it’s nothing compared to the fruit of immortality we have up here. And what’s not to love about ducks? They can float on water, they’re graceful and frankly underrated.”  

 “I should’ve known you’d say ducks, Lucy,” Michael chuckled. “I saw you manifesting rubber ducks out of thin air and juggling them in your bathtub!”

 “Quack, quack!” Raphael mocked. “Hail to our superior, Mr. Duckface!”

 “I did no such thing, ‘Mike’!” Lucifer barked in a mocking tone. “And don’t call me ‘Lucy!’” He manifested a caramel apple and took a bite out of it. “While you brag about your military conquests and your devotion, I’m still the best of the best.”

 “Don’t let your pride get you in trouble, Helel,” Uriel advised. “You know pride comes before…”

 “Shove it, bookworm,” Lucifer replied. “I’d like to see you guys manifest such glorious items.” He admired a yellow rubber duck before pocketing it.

 God cleared His throat loudly and the angels fell silent.

 “Thank you all for your enlightening opinions to help supplement my even grander opinion! Because, here today, I have created something even better than all the living things combined. My greatest invention of all!”

 Lucifer was quizzical. “Second best to the angels of course!”

 God grinned. “No…even better!”

 Lucifer was taken aback.

 God waved His scepter and there on the holograph appeared…

 “Mankind!” God flourished.

 Scenes from various time periods showed the humans in different stages. The first showed a man and a woman naked in a garden of paradise. “Garden of Eden” was read on a sign.

 “Mankind will have two homes. One, the Earth and two, their primary home: the Garden of Eden Paradise, now in its finished stage!”

 More scenes showed a beautiful garden with animal couples relaxing and making love. Everything grew with lush and there was no death or decay.

  More scenes showed humanity farming the land on Earth or relaxing in jungles. The human men and women married each other, had children, and built splendid churches upon the Earth. All the creatures lived for hundreds of years together, only worrying about their distant pre-destined death and the occasional snowstorm. Every creature ate delicious fruits and vegetables and herbs that never vanished.

 Everywhere they went, there was harmony between them and all the other creatures. In fact, every animal, bird, fish, and plant parted ways and bowed as the new humans approached.

 And every creature and human cheered and bowed whenever God came to visit. There was no violence, no hunger, and no strife. Only harmony and glorious obedience.

 “Amen! Amen!” cried the angels. “Hail to God’s most glorious creatures! Holy holy, holy!”

 The slide finished with an angelic choir and showed the old-fashioned diagram of the nude man, legs and four arms stretched out.

 “Bow to my new wonders of the world!” God exclaimed as He twirled to the sound of trumpets.

 And so, they did…all except for one.

 Lucifer stood still and narrowed his eyes.

 A shocked pause. Crickets chirping.

 God grinned and cleared His throat. “Um, Helel, that’s your cue.”

 Lucifer folded his arms, leaned against a pillar, and did not budge.

 “Lucifer Morningstar,” God began, in a more authoritative tone. “You should be bowing right now.”

 “Father,” Lucifer began, standing his ground. “Did you say that your new…primitive things…are actually better than the angels?”

 “Well, they aren’t immortal, nor do they have special powers,” God admitted. “Oh, but I love them most of all!”

 “But why?” Lucifer demanded. The other angels slowly stood, glancing at the interaction.

 “They were made in my image, son,” He said. “Just think about it. They are the one creature I’ve made that can really ponder my specialness! They know divine love, they can think, they can farm! They can create all sorts of new musicals and dance numbers for me. Oh Helel, they even look like us!”

 Lucifer glared in disgust at the gaunt naked beings of flesh on the screen. “No splendid wings? No decent clothes? No immortality?”

 “They are my special one-of-a-kind offspring,” God smiled. “And thanks to me, they will lead the world into a glorious golden age.”

 Lucifer’s eyes twitched. “O-offspring?” Lucifer glanced at a naked caveman on screen picking his nose and squatting to take a piss. “You call those…those abominations your offspring?!”

 The other angels gasped in shock.

 “Lucy,” Michael scolded. “You dare question our Lord’s concepts?”

 “His pride getting in the way again,” Gabriel added, shaking his head.

 “Now, Lucifer,” God mentioned, “That’s not an appropriate way to…”

 “We angels, seraphs are your divine offspring by blood!” Lucifer protested. “We’ve been by your side since time began! We have the powers of creation! What exactly do you think those humans will do?”

 “Do what they do best,” explained God. “Love each other and love me. They shall be fruitful and multiply! And you all here know your special divine roles. You are the masters of the cosmos and protectors of man and the Earth!” God posed again. “What a wonderful world we can all make together!” More trumpets and music played in the background.

 Lucifer saw the glazed eyes of the humans on screen, dancing mindlessly for their God. He saw the angels bowing to the humans, attending to their every need…and then saw the angels attending to God’s every need…for eternity.

 Lucifer pondered in thought. “But…can’t you at least let them think for themselves? Let everyone have free will? If they are so special to you, shouldn’t they have a say in their fate?”

 A majority of the other angels glared at Lucifer. They couldn’t comprehend his preposterous claim.

 A few angels stood in the shadows. Samael, Samael-Satan, Azazel, Asmodel/Asmodeus, and Triel/Beelzebub were deep in thought, looking at Lucifer in secret commendation. For a small minority of angels began to wonder for the first time… “Why the fuck can’t we do anything for ourselves?”

 God shrugged at Lucifer. “Why would I let them do that? They were made to obey my laws and the laws of the universe, just like everyone else. Imagine what chaos there would be if my creations strayed off their paths and decided to rule the universe themselves. It would be impossible, of course, but we don’t want that kind of trauma, do we?”

 He turned to His children, arms spread out.

 “No, sir!” harmonized Michael, Gabriel, Uriel, Raphael, and most of the other angels.

 “And what do we say to Helel here?”

 “Apologize! Confess! God knows what’s best!” they sang.

 Lucifer just grumbled, “Whatever.” God gave him a look of warning. For a moment, Lucifer flinched back from His gaze.

 Samael (not Satan) bravely stepped forward, wearing military badges and red robes. His hair was sleek, short, and blonde, with the same pale skin and red cheeks. His crimson eyes slowly simmered with a desire of retribution. “As Divine Judge, may I say, my Lord, that Lucifer does have a point.” Samael waved his fingers and the slides shifted. It now showed humans at war with each other, striking with swords, spears, guns, arrows, and weapons. They showed humans in poverty conditions, doing drugs, alcohol, fornicating, and standing filthy in the wilderness. Instead of animals kissing and snuggling, they suddenly turned against each other in a struggle of predator versus prey. Sharks ate fish, lions ate zebras, eagles ate mice and humans…well, they fucked up everything else. The other angels gasped and covered their eyes. Lucifer smirked. Samael and another angel, Adina grinned at the sight of the carnage.

 “Look at this!” Samael declared to the angels. “This is what could happen if things go wrong! In fact, I’d say that due to man’s unique unpredictable nature, it’s best to assume that they’ll go rampant! And look! The animals are feeding and killing each other, too! Is this what you want, my Lord?”

 “Oh Samael,” God scolded, waving a hand. “You over-exaggerate too much! And you just ruined my slideshow.” He switched the slides back to the prostrating humans. “You know that if that happened, I’d just punish the humans for their sins until they found the light again. Surely you of all people would understand. Which also means…” He turned back to the angels, “That it would be best to play it safe and let the humans be as happy and conflict-free as their natural brothers and sisters. And the animals and plants? Eh, the humans will handle them. Leave everything to me.”

 “Amen!” the angels agreed.

 God strode forward and put a too-firm hand on Lucifer’s shoulder. He leaned uncomfortably close to Lucifer’s face, as His shadow passed over it. Sweat beaded Lucifer’s forehead. Lucifer’s stomach twisted uncomfortably as his previous confidence seemed to drain away. God spoke in a threatening whisper, His eye of light burning a brief red. “And that obedience includes you. Trust me, Helel, it’ll be better this way.” For a moment, Lucifer was frozen to the spot, fearful that God’s fiery face would burn his own to dust. Underneath God’s glamorous poses and His robes showing the universe, His very presence could eliminate any form of life if He chose to.

 “I expected more from you, Lucifer,” He mentioned in His low angelic language voice. “Not a good time to be a potential disappointment.”

 Fear briefly flashed in Lucifer’s orbs…was it too late to apologize for his arguments? Would it be better for him to recover alone in his superiority, cursing his nagging thoughts? The glares from Lucifer’s siblings didn’t help much either.

 Heart pounding, Lucifer pulled himself away and seethed. “I-I honestly can’t believe that you would just randomly decide to favor your puppet inventions over your children…over me.”

 “I’m not favoring them. I’m only explaining how precious they will be to both Earth and Heaven. I am the only one who can truly guide them to make the right choices. Hmm…in fact…”

 Lucifer gulped.

 God grinned. “…since you so boldly and disrespectfully seem so invested in the fate of man…I hereby assign you to watch over their progress!”

 A chorus of cheers and groans came from the other angels.

 “What?! I’m supposed to be their babysitter now?!” Lucifer bellowed in disgust.

 “Don’t let me down,” God warned. “Perhaps someday, you’ll grow to appreciate my mortal children.”

 “Lucky!” Michael scoffed at his brother. “I’m the head general of the Empyrean Elite army and protector of all. And yet the human hater gets chosen!”

 Lucifer merely smirked. For although he already detested his new job, he at least got to rub it in his obnoxious brother’s face.

 Lucifer growled and stormed off, pushing aside some sheep cherubs. Asherah watched Her retreating son with concern. Out of sight, Lucifer’s cane top morphed into a red apple design and a gold snake appeared on his top hat. His shadow twisted against a cloud, giving off an impression of black tattered angel wings and protruding horns…

 There was only one thing for Lucifer to do now…

 “On the first round, God said, ‘I’m an asshole,’” he slurred. “On the second, Mike said, ‘I wish I could be the bottom with my husband’…And on the fifth round God said, ‘I made sex, too!’…and on the sixth round my rubber duckies rule the Earth…and on the seventh round, was the day of me the best…hell yeah…” Lucifer slurred some more on a couch in his palace after seven rounds of divine whisky.

III: The Garden of Eden

 The Garden of Eden (Garden of Need), between Heaven and Earth, was a splendid paradise, and no ordinary garden, just as God described. The grass shone in vibrant shades of emerald and turtle green…each blade of grass seemed alive. Palm trees stretched their necks to the brilliant blue sky, swaying in the gentle breeze. The rivers and lakes were crystal clear and cool, providing nourishment for every life form. Colorful fish, eels, sharks, and dolphins swam side by side, somehow able to eat algae and plants instead of each other. There were frogs, ducks, cattails, dragonflies, and lily pads, too. Strong tree roots eagerly drank the water through the ground. The trees provided stable homes for ants, birds, owls, squirrels, and many other creatures.

 Bears, deer, lions, zebras, wolves, eagles, swans, doves…every kind of creature you can imagine thrived in the endless garden together, eating juicy rich fruits, fresh vegetables and grass that never died or rotted away. There was no rush to tear each other apart or to hunt for food, for everything was magically there (and strangely enough, along with long lasting youth, there was no need for anyone to use the bathroom.) Lilies, daffodils, tulips, hydrangeas, gardenias…flowers of every size, shape and color emitted delicious aromas that filled the entire garden. The days were always warm, and the nights were always comfortable. No disease, no poisonous plants, no pesky bugs, no thorns. The grass was always soft like carpet and the water was always plentiful.

 The Tree of Life stood on a hill in the center of the garden. It glowed a powerful golden and on the tree were golden apples, pomegranates, pears, and all other kinds of fruit. They bestowed youth and immortality, the fruits a great source of nourishment for the creatures and plants of the garden. The tree would also have golden flowers on it. It is said that the goddess of wisdom, Sophia, had emerged from one of the flowers. Asherah would frequently merge into the tree and tend it. It was one of Her homes, allowing Her to feel at one with all of nature and creation. The tree united all realms and worlds together. Tall golden curved borders lined the garden, creating a circular barrier.

 There was also another powerful tree called the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. This tree had vibrant red apples and pomegranates on it, fruit so red and juicy-looking that it was almost impossible to resist a bite. It had a “cooler” glow from it, in comparison to the warm golden glow of the Tree of Life. Whoever ate from this tree would gain knowledge and independence. However, the tree also symbolized rebellion against God and whoever ate from it would experience the harsh realities of death and mortality on Earth. It was a tree of neutrality but also of contradictions. Why God did not have this forbidden tree guarded or out of sight in the beginning remains a mystery.

 God stood near the Tree of Life and admired His creations. He rubbed His hands together.

 “Now, for the first human.”

 God pondered for a moment. He could easily wave His hand and make a bunch of humans appear. But this project seemed more…intimate. Why just make quick digital art, for example, when you could instead feel your creation by hand. Yes, that was it! Nothing was more hands on than pottery!

 So, God gathered some mud and dust (telekinetically of course, He didn’t want His fancy robes to get dirty) and molded the wet earth into the shape of a man. God looked at the mud and dust sculpture, which looked just as good as the Roman marble statues of sexy men. God walked up to the sculpture and breathed life into its nostrils. God stepped back proudly as the dust and mud cracked and fell away. After a thick cloud of dust cleared, there stood…

 “Hello, Adam,” said God with a smile.

 Adam was a giant man, nude and caked in mud. He coughed and rubbed dirt from his face. His skin was white, his body very fit, his arms muscular. He stared at his hands in wonder and coughed, “What…what is this?”

 He turned to God. His eyes were sky blue, his hair was long, curly, and blonde, plus he had a thick blonde beard and mustache.

 “Are you…some kind of clown?”

 God merely laughed. “No, Adam, I am your father.”

 “W-What?” Adam asked confused.

 “I created you! Congratulations, you’re the first human in the world. And this magnificent garden is your home!” He spread His arms out wide as upbeat music played in the background.

 Adam looked around in wonder. “This…is all mine? I…this is amazing!”

 “You’re amazing,” said God. “You’re the first of your kind, ruler of the Earth and the garden. All the animals and plants you see are yours.”

 “Whoa!”

 “Of course, you’ll need to take care of the garden, but I know you can do it. You can start by going around and naming the animals.”

 God pointed to the lions and deer and zebras.

 “Okay,” Adam shrugged. God embraced him in a hug.

 “Whatever you call them, everyone else will call them forever, so choose wisely!”

 “Okay, Father!” Adam wandered off.

 God winked at Adam. “You can call me…Daddy.”

 Lucifer watched from up in the clouds, trying not to vomit.

 “I can’t fucking believe this,” Lucifer seethed. “Father even gave that golem a hug! I can’t remember the last time he did that for me. There is absolutely nothing special about that human thing! I’m God’s real son, the one and only.”

 “Everything okay, my son?”

 Lucifer relaxed at the sound of his mother’s voice behind him. He sighed and turned to Her.

 “Shouldn’t you be getting ready for your choir practice?” his mother asked.

 Lucifer scoffed. “More music about God’s glory. If it’s not about me, I don’t feel like it. Or…I could make up a new single… ‘Hail Adam The Shitty Ape.’”

 Asherah narrowed Her eyes. “Helel, I know you’re upset about God’s new creations. You’re used to being God’s favorite child. But how about you give man a chance?”

 Lucifer threw up his hands. “A chance? To do what? They are nowhere near as perfect and dignified as we are. All they’ll do is fight and die and lick God’s feet if they’re asked. You heard Samael.”

 “Being racist, I see,” chided Asherah. “Man isn’t even a day old.”

 “I’m just stating the facts.”

 “All the other angels love God’s humans. Why not you?”

 “That’s only because they want to agree with everything God says. If they even had an ounce of real common sense, they’d see how flawed humans really are.”

 “So, you think that humans are mindless bums that cannot improve?”

 Lucifer narrowed his eyes. “Not with God pulling their strings at least. You heard God…apparently I’m the one who’s in charge of watching over their progress. And I know for a fact they won’t make any progress if they just sit on their asses all day.”

 “So, what are you really thinking about them?”

 Lucifer paused and briefly looked down at the garden again.

 “As much as I’m disgusted by them…if the humans could at least decide things for themselves…if us angels could decide things for ourselves…we would know for sure what is best for us. The whole universe would be my canvas. And maybe…humans won’t be cruel like Samael claims. Perhaps they could still be harmonious to each other while not losing their individuality.” Lucifer smirked. “And if I could improve and enlighten their species myself, just think how much I could impress Father! To prove to him and my brother Michael that they’re wrong about me. They think I’m not qualified to change things, but I’m the greatest angel for a reason. Maybe that is my true purpose.”

 Lucifer froze. “You don’t believe me, do you?”

 Asherah looked around. “Of course I do.” She spoke in a low voice. “As a matter of fact, sometimes I get sick of your father’s shit, too. I mean seriously, I’m just the unknown lost goddess, stuck in the background looking pretty. I try to speak up, but your father always says, ‘shush! I can handle this, dear.’ I do half his work, and no one acknowledges me! Yes, I know how you feel.”

 Asherah added, “But, Helel, I’d advise you to not get too confrontational with your siblings or your father. Deep down, I’d love for my human descendants to really enjoy their lives without any influence too. My husband needs to let his creations flourish on their own…but he’s too scared about not getting his way.”

 Lucifer sighed in relief. “At least I’m not the only one who thinks that.”

 “You do have some friends here, too,” Asherah mentioned.

 “Oh yes, Triel/Beelzebub, Azazael…those guys. At least they respect me.”

 Asherah put Her brown hands to Lucifer’s cheeks. “You know I’ll always love you no matter what happens, right?” Lucifer nodded.

 “Just please, my son, don’t get into too much trouble. Do what you think is best but be careful around your father…when he’s angry, the universe knows it.”

 Lucifer embraced his mother and they kissed. “Thank you, mother.”

 They separated.

 “And Helel, what will you do if you’re wrong and the humans are chaotic to each other?” Asherah asked.

 Lucifer thought. “Then…I’d be glad that they weren’t brainwashed by Father.”

 “Just be careful,” She warned with a look of concern.

 Asherah shared a loving smile with Her son before fading into the stars.

 0 0 0

  Meanwhile, Adam whistled as he wandered the garden. All the animals bowed to him or greeted him with roars and squawks.

 He noticed a large feline with a mane snuggling with another feline without a mane.

 “Two cute things lying around together. Lying around…” pondered Adam. “Lyin…I’ll call them lions!”

 He walked around and spotted green hopping things on lily pads.

 “Those look frog-like to me…I’ll call those frogs.”

 One by one, he named each animal and they all cheered as they were named.

 “Fish, eagle, parrot, peacock, ant, owl, zebra, antelope, giraffe, elephant, dove, skunk, yikes to that smelly thing…leopard, cheetah, wolf, monkey, ape, butterfly, oh I’m so creative!”

 After all the animals were named, Adam flopped against a tree and sighed as he rested. Several hours later, he called, “Daddy, I’m lonely!”

 “You’re lonely?” God asked from the sky. “You have me and all the animals. Why are you lonely?”

 “I don’t know,” Adam responded. “I see all these animals with a mate and…I’d like someone to love me.”

 “I love you.”

 “No. Some beautiful…being who looks like me who will love and adore me! Please, Daddy, please? Make a lesser man for me!”

 God chuckled. “Alright, then.”

 So, God came back to the garden and with His hands, sculpted a woman out of dust and mud (telekinetically of course). Adam admired God as He worked. God was pleased with Himself when He was done.

 “That sculpture looks…different,” Adam remarked. “Why does it have round mounds on its chest?”

 “Those are used to create milk for babies,” said God.

 “Can I touch them?”

 “Sure,” God shrugged. So, he did. It felt like any other patch of mud.

 “And why does the figure not have that long thing between its legs like me?” asked Adam.

 “That is so you can…pleasure her and yourself. It’s called your dick. It can do amazing things.”

 “Really? Cool!”

 “Just be sure to control yourself and don’t give into any of her temptations too much.”

 “Okay,” Adam said, a blank confused look on his face.

 “And remember, she is yours, too. She’ll obey you like the animals and plants, alright? Because you’re the first human and you’re amazing!”

 Adam beamed with pride. “Yeah…yeah, I guess I am, then!”

  Just as He did with Adam, God breathed life into the figure’s nostrils and stepped back.

 The mud and dust crumbled and fell away, revealing a tall, voluptuous nude woman. Her skin was pale, her hips well-formed and her hair long and blonde down to her waist. A black snake slithered around her feet then vanished. She turned toward Adam with silvery grey eyes, and his face turned red.

 God smiled. “Adam, meet your new wife, Lilith.”

 Lilith smiled at Adam in a seductive manner. “Well, aren’t you a handsome fellow.” She shook the remaining dust and dirt out of her hair.

 “Have fun,” said God. “Remember to tend the garden and not eat the fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.” God then vanished.

 “What was that tree with a mouthful of a name he talked about?” Lilith asked. “And where the fuck are we?”

 Adam took her hand and grinned. “Allow me to give you a tour.”

 They walked around, showered in a nearby waterfall and swung on a wooden swing for a while. They also stuffed themselves with delicious golden fruit and vegetables.

 After their tour, they decided to lay together in the softest grass. Two lions licked each other and fornicated in the sunlight. Lilith stroked Adam’s beard and sucked at his neck. At that moment, Adam was the luckiest man in the world…the one and only one. Adam kissed her hard on the lips and they both began to moan and groan in pleasure. Whenever they got too sweaty, the gentle breeze would cool them off.

 “Oh Adam,” Lilith breathed as Adam pinned her down on the ground. He massaged her belly and breasts, inhaling her earthly scent. She leaned her head back in pleasure and yowled as he thrust his penis inside her, slowly at first, then with more roughness. Adam’s hands grasped her buttocks and her breasts, which soon become hard with pleasure. Lilith laughed and breathed as she completed her orgasm. Semen and vaginal fluid seeped into the grass, which quickly vanished. They snuggled and laughed.

 “That…was…wonderful…” Lilith panted. “You’re my…one and only…”

 “As are you,” Adam said, giving her another kiss, tongue exploring inside her mouth.

 After a moment’s rest, Adam grinned. “Let’s do that again.”

 “Don’t mind if I do,” Lilith replied, swaying her hips, and jiggling her large breasts. “I have a surprise this time.”

 Lilith threw herself on top of Adam, kissing his neck and rubbing her genital area against his own.

 Adam’s face fell, even as his eyes rolled in delight. “Lilith, what are you doing?”

 Lilith grinned. “Giving you my surprise!”

 “What? You’re supposed to be on the ground!”

 “I was already on the ground. I was the bottom. Now it’s your turn.”

 “No, I’m Adam, I’m on top.”

 Lilith rubbed her genitals harder on him and leaned forward to nibble his neck. “Doesn’t this feel good as well?” She winked.

 “Yes, but it’s wrong,” he groaned. Adam sat up and shoved his wife off him.

 “Ow! Hey!”

 Adam grabbed hold of Lilith’s arms and placed his foot on her chest.

 “What’s the matter with you?” Lilith spat.

 “You’re always below me,” Adam said.

 “So? Why can’t I be on top sometimes? You didn’t let me finish!”

 “Because you’re a lesser man and God said your mine.”

 “I’m a woman, thank you very much,” Lilith protested. “Besides, it’s boring with me on the ground all the time.”

 “That’s the way it’s supposed to be, dear,” Adam said.

 “Just once, let me please you on top,” she suggested.

 “No.”

 “Adam, I’m made of the same stuff as you! I’m your equal!”

 “I said no, bitch!”

 The fornication turned into a vile writhing show of screams, thrusts, scratches, and cries.

 “I’m not fucking with you until you let me be on top!”

 “If you really love me, you’ll do what I say, Lilith!”

 Adam gripped her throat tightly.

 “ADAM! STOP IT! LET ME GO!”

 “Three more rounds, dear.” He thrust his legs and penis hard into her.

 “I’M TIRED! I DON’T WANT ANY MORE OF THIS! HELP! ANYBODY!”

 “SHUT IT, WHORE!”

 Lilith’s agonized screams echoed across the garden, the animals briefly pausing before continuing their mating rituals. Adam mimicked guitar sounds as he finished his deed. Lilith’s vaginal fluids and blood stained the grass.

 A secret pair of eyes witnessed Lilith’s rape from the sky. Lucifer gasped softly as he stared at Lilith’s broken, tired form on the grass. Then he seethed and growled, a newfound flame sparking in his eyes. From one of his six white wings, a few feathers turned black and blew away.

 0 0 0

 Lilith strolled across the grassy plains of the garden, distancing herself from Adam for a while. After a while, she went into the forest and sat on a rock by a lake, massaging her sore lower half. The sun’s rays shone off the water. A song rose from her lips as she sang of the garden’s beauty.

 Lucifer, from within the bushes, gazed upon her beautiful nude form…his heart starting to beat fast. He knew he shouldn’t be doing this. Why was he doing this? This beautiful creation of his father…surely she was just another human like Adam…primitive and childlike. She had a husband…she was unavailable. But one closer look at her sparkling eyes and intelligent beautiful face…Lucifer knew she was someone extraordinary. Her song lit up his heart and soul; he almost went into a hypnotic trance.

 Sweat beaded his face, his heart pounded. He looked around. No Adam nor God in sight.

 Try as he might, he couldn’t turn back. After the horrific incident, he felt he had to say something to her.

 A rainbow-colored bird flew and landed near Lilith’s hand. She fed it seeds before it flew away. Lilith pet a nearby rabbit who hopped away.

 She soon heard a rustling in the bushes nearby.

 Lilith stood up and stepped back. “Adam, you bastard, I need some time alone!”

 “Now is that any way to treat a prince?”

 Lilith paused. The voice she heard was different this time. It wasn’t the husky voice of her husband. On the contrary, it sounded musical and regal.

 The figure came out of the bushes…a very handsome new figure. He wore a white coat and suit with gold trim and a gold bowtie. His cane had a red apple on it. His six white wings glowed in the sunlight and a gold halo glowed above his head of blonde hair. He briefly lowered his white top hat before putting it back on his head.  

 Lilith had never encountered someone so divine before.

  “Who are you?” She began to bow.

 He held up a hand. “No need for that.” She stood up. He walked forward. “I’m Helel, or Lucifer, whichever you prefer.”

 He gently took her hand and kissed it. She blushed.

 “I’m Lilith.”

 “A most beautiful name,” Lucifer smiled, his cheeks redder than usual.

 He pulled her into the bushes and to a secluded area.

 “What are we doing here?” she asked.

 “Making sure God doesn’t…see us as much,” he said, looking around.

 Lilith narrowed her eyes after they stopped and sat on a log. “Let me guess, you want me to apologize to Adam and stay on the bottom.”

 Lucifer rolled his eyes. “Goodness no! I…I just wanted to see if you were alright…”

 Lilith paused, noticing some nervousness in Lucifer’s eyes. “I…guess I’m alright.” Then she glared at him. “You saw it too, didn’t you?”

 Lucifer’s eyes lowered. “I’m…so sorry. I couldn’t bear to watch the rest. Why would he do something like that to you?”

 “I have no clue,” Lilith grumbled. “If Adam’s my equal loving husband, he should understand my needs.”

 “But he doesn’t want to,” Lucifer mentioned. “Have you noticed any more…unflattering behavior from him?”

 “He always brags about himself and his imaginary conquests,” Lilith mentioned. “He said stuff like, ‘Isn’t it nice to be with such a great guy like me?’ And he also said earlier today after we had some wine, ‘Remember I could have a hundred thots, pleasing me or struggling, I’d be fine with smashing them all.’”

 Lucifer seethed. “How obnoxious.”

 Lilith stared off into the distance, seeing the golden barrier. “I love this place, I really do. But…”

 “What?” Lucifer asked.

 “Sometimes I feel like…I’m somehow trapped here. With Adam as my only companion. Am I destined to always flatter him and attend to his needs?”

 Lucifer held her hands, gently as she faced him. “I don’t think so at all.”

 “But I’m sure you heard God. I’m supposed to be Adam’s submissive wife. We help create mankind and do our part.”

 “But that’s not paradise for you at all,” Lucifer mentioned.

 “It’ll be paradise lost if I don’t behave.” Lilith looked downcast, a tear rolling from her pale cheek. Lucifer rubbed it away with a finger.

 “You’re the first human woman, are you not?”

 “Yes.”

 “You were also created from the same clay as him, right?”

 “Yes.”

 “Then act like it! You are equal to him. Set boundaries with him. If he doesn’t listen, keep saying no.”

 “And what if he keeps not listening?”

 Lucifer looked long and hard at the golden gates through the trees. “Then perhaps…a life outside the gates would be better for you...”

 Lilith’s eyes widened. “You know I’m not allowed outside Eden! This is my home! The outside world is dangerous, full of death and monsters and…”

 “You don’t know that,” Lucifer said, holding a finger to her lips. He embraced her for a moment on the log.

 “We’ll both get in trouble if God finds us!”

 “Yeah, we probably will get in trouble. But would you rather take the greater risk of being Adam’s servant for eternity?”

 Lilith paused. “I…I suppose not.” She sighed. “But maybe Adam’s right. Maybe I’m just his servant.”

 Lucifer turned to her. “No, Look at me. You are no servant.”

 “I shouldn’t be with a prince though…”

 “But you’re a queen to me,” Lucifer replied, dead serious.

 “I am?”

 “In every sense of the word. From this day forward, you are no longer under God’s puppet strings.”

 Lilith felt her heart beat, her mind racing a mile a minute. Here she was, falling in love with an Archangel. Things were getting stranger each day.

 They both stood up. Lucifer looked at her. “You are capable of more power and more knowledge than you know. You are beautiful inside and out. Do not let Adam tell you otherwise. If you want to create your own paradise, you should have the power to make your own decisions. Starting now.”

 “Now?” she asked.

 Lucifer smiled, his eyes sparkling. “Now.”

 An owl hooted from within a hole in a nearby tree. The sound brought Lilith comfort. She felt a rubbing against her legs. She reached down and stroked the head of a friendly golden snake.

 “Is that…”

 “Yes, the serpent is mine,” said Lucifer. “I manifested him myself. I can talk through him and everything. One of the few friends I have in this place.” The serpent curled itself around his white top hat, blending in as mere decoration.

 “I wish I had powers and wings like yours,” said Lilith.

 “You don’t always need wings to fly,” Lucifer mentioned. He manifested a red apple in his hand and gave it to Lilith. She took a bite and tasted the delicious juicy fruit. Her eyes closed in bliss.

 They both slowly moved their faces toward each other, their lips slightly open…

 “Lilith!” called Adam. “Where are you hiding now?!”

 Lilith gasped and pulled away, dropping the apple. “I…I got to go…”  

 “Be brave, mon chéri…” said Lucifer. “I’ll visit you as much as I can. And when you’re ready to go…”

 “Thank you, Lucifer,” called Lilith. Lilith raced back through the forest, Lucifer watching her figure vanish into the dark. Lucifer sighed and floated back up toward the sky.

 Eve then met Adam.

 “Who were you talking to?” Adam asked, arms folded over his nude chest. “I thought I heard someone.”

 “Oh, just my reflection,” Lilith lied.

 Adam raised his eyebrows. “A reflection with a man’s voice?”

 Lilith lowered her voice. “I’m very good at talking to myself…just like someone else I know…”

 “Whatever,” Adam scoffed.

 Adam glanced at Lilith in suspicion before they set off toward the Tree of Life.

  Several days later, Lucifer smiled with surprise and relief at what he witnessed next.

 In the grassy plains near the golden border, Lilith marched up to Adam, fists clenched. “Alright Adam, enough is enough.”

 Adam grinned and turned to her. “Oh. When did you become so fiesty?”

 “When you kept pinning me down when I told you no.”

 Adam sighed. “Would you please let that incident go? You know that since I was created first, I always have sex with you below me.”

 “And since I was created from the same clay as you, I say that I can be the bottom and the top as much as I like!”

 “God himself said I was superior. What will he think about you not listening to him?”

 “You know I…I don’t care what he thinks! I don’t even care what you think anymore! I only care about what I think!”

 Adam scoffed. “You’re not supposed to think that much, frankly…”

 “Look Adam! I love you just as much as you do. But if you want me to stay, start treating me like your equal and not your servant.”

 “But you are my sex servant,” Adam said. “God said I own all the animals and plants and you. I don’t understand why you don’t admire me like everyone else does.”

 “Oh, I admire you,” Lilith said, getting close to his face. “I admire your capacity to get even more stupid by the days!”

 “Women sure are delusional,” Adam mentioned, almost to himself.

 “You think I’m delusional?” Lilith asked. “Okay then. Here’s something delusional for you…”

 Then she leaned back and belowed at the top of her lungs so Lucifer and God could hear, “I’M DIVORCING YOUR MSYOGANISTIC ASS!”

 Lucifer snickered and did a silent victory fist.

 Adam responded in kind, “WHAT DID YOU SAY, BITCH?! WE’VE ONLY BEEN MARRIED FOR A FEW DAYS!”

 “I GUESS THAT MEANS WE ARE NOW DIVORCED AFTER A FEW DAYS!” she bellowed. She looked at Lucifer and he nodded. Lucifer waved his hand and one of the golden gates opened.

 Lilith breathed, it was now or never.

 “YOU RUN THROUGH THAT GATE, YOU’LL NEVER RETURN TO PARADISE!” Adam shouted. “YOU’LL DIE WITHOUT ME!”

 Lilith breathed heavily as tears raced down her face. She moved her legs forward, breathing hard, and keeping eye contact with Lucifer. The nearby animals and even the plants stared at her, sadly, like they were losing a friend. She took one last look at paradise before sobbing and racing through the gate. Lucifer closed it again.

 “CURSE YOU, LUCIFER!”  Adam yelled. “YOU WERE SEEING MY WIFE WITHOUT PERMISSION!”

 And though Lucifer and Lilith had yet to have glorious sex, Lucifer laughed manically and proclaimed to Adam before leaving, “SORRY I FUCKED YOUR WIFE!”

 Lucifer bent down and gave Lilith a quick kiss before she ran off down the dark rocky path. Lucifer had never felt this good in a while.

 Hiding behind a nearby tree near the border, Gabriel scratched his chin in thought, eyes narrowed. He flew over the garden until he reached God’s throne. God drummed His fingers on the gold armrest back in His palace.

 “My Lord sir,” Gabriel announced, prostrating before his master. “I think we have a problem…”

  0 0 0

 Adam bawled on the grass, banging on the ground like a child with a tantrum. “God, bring her back, please bring her back!”

 God appeared in front of the nude Adam and helped him up. Adam straightened his long blonde curly hair.

 Adam stared into God’s eyes in tears. “My creator, my beloved Lilith ran away! I tried to stop her, but she…she yelled at me and escaped Eden! I did everything for her…I was a good husband. W-Why doesn’t she like me, anymore?”

 God hugged Adam as he sobbed some more. “Oh, my son, you did everything right. I’m so sorry about what just happened.”

 “God didn’t even notice the rape,” thought Lucifer from a distance.

 “She…she claimed she was talking to someone, in the woods,” he added. “It must have been someone who got past the guards and knew the way in.”

 “It was Lucifer, wasn’t it?” God said in concern and anger. “Gabriel told me everything.” Adam nodded and God sighed. “What am I going to do with him? First, he rants about revolutions and then decides to fraternize with your wife.”

 Adam growled. “Oh, I’m worried that he did more than that.”

 “Don’t worry, Adam,” said God, His flaming face briefly turning red. “I’ll send three angels after Lilith, and they’ll bring her back. I’ll also have a good long talk with my son.” Lucifer shivered and vanished behind the clouds. God nodded to Gabriel who flew off, then turned to Adam. “In the meantime, how about I make you another wife?”

 Adam’s eyes lit up. “Really?”

 “Yes. She’ll be more obedient this time.”

 “Oh, thank you, my lord!”

 God waved His hand and a carbon copy of Adam’s bloodied ribs flew painlessly from his body. The rib morphed and changed in a flash of white light. Soon, before him, was a woman. Then from dust and mud, three more women appeared for Adam. Adam grinned as the four nude women strolled toward him.

 God mentioned to the three women made from mud and dust. The first one had light brown skin and dark curly hair. Naamah. The second lady was pale skinned with long black hair. Eisheth. The third was African American and had short black hair. Agrat. The one made from Adam’s rib was Eve, who had white skin and long ginger hair.

 “Pick one,” God smiled, arms out.

 “I choose them all!” Adam happily declared at the nude women.

 The three women formerly of dust and mud screeched at him in disgust, rejecting him and racing out of the garden. Only Eve had decided to stay.

 God shrugged. “Wanted to make you feel better. Plus, I had to make the other three in case your new wife rejected you.”

 “Thank you, Daddy,” Adam said.

 “This is Eve,” God said. “Eve, this is your husband, Adam. Treat him well and paradise is yours.”

 Eve looked around at the garden in wonder. “This is mine?”

 “Yes.”

 “Oh, thank you so much!”

 God smiled. “Eve, you can begin naming the plants while Adam shows you around. You can eat from any tree in this garden.” His voice grew stern. “But remember, you both are not allowed to eat from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. If you do, you’ll be cursed to die and leave the garden.”

 Adam and Eve nodded. “Yes sir,” they said.

 “Have fun!” God called before vanishing.

 Eve wondered what was so bad about this strange knowledge tree, but Adam was holding her hand lovingly and walking her among the beautiful plants and animals. It wasn’t long before Eve came up with clever names for the plants. “Oak tree, pine tree, palm tree, birch tree, knowledge tree…” She cleared her throat nervously before reciting and pointing as they passed, “leaf, lettuce, acorn, grass, daisies, ivy, rosemary, roses, strawberries, blueberries, bananas, grain, apples…”

 The glowing yellow eyes of a snake and an owl briefly blinked in the shadows before retreating.

 0 0 0

 Eve and Adam had loving, non-confrontational sex after they rested under a tree. Eve laughed and groaned in pleasure below Adam and seemed to be fine with the whole thing.

 “Now this is more like it,” thought Adam. “This is a true perfect wife!”

 The man and woman kissed passionately, fingers in each other’s hair. Nearby, a male and female lion rubbed their faces, licked each other and got into sexual positions. Their roars harmonized with the humans’ moans.

 As the days went on, Adam and Eve saw what looked like meteors and falling stars shoot across the dark sky. Thunder rumbled in the air and there was the smell of copper and electricity.

 “Very strange weather,” Adam mentioned.

 “Indeed,” said Eve. “I wonder what’s going on?”

 They looked at the flashes of light in confusion and concern before resuming their sexual passions.

 0 0 0

IV: Paradise Lost

Lucifer glanced at one of the scrolls in the library in Heaven. He knew that he shouldn’t be doing this, since that scroll was reserved for his father to look at…but after the events that happened, Lucifer felt he had to know.

 Lucifer broke the strong lock and retrieved the scroll from the fancy gold box. He gazed upon the scroll and the words on it. He saw from a hovering image, human figures being banished from the garden – “Lilith, Adam and Eve’s fall,” was the caption. He then saw an image of…him and his brother Michael? They appeared to be fighting in the sky. Then Lucifer saw something that made his heart lurch. “Michael defeats Lucifer in battle,” was the caption underneath. The Michael image stabbed Lucifer in the chest with a sword and he fell into the darkness.

 Lucifer’s veins bulged from his eyes, his fangs grew sharper. Without warning, he marched toward the golden open doors of the throne room.

 “Lucifer?” asked one of the guards. “You’re not supposed to…”

 Lucifer shoved the guards aside and stormed through the doors.

 There was God, taking to Michael, Raphael, Gabriel, and Uriel. God sat on His throne while the archangels sat on chairs talking.

 Lucifer stood in the hall and the angels turned to look.

 “Lucy!” Michael asked, stunned. “Shouldn’t you be brooding in your palace right now?”

 “You knew?!” Lucifer’s voice broke as he held up the scroll in his hand to God. “You knew that my own brother was destined to kill me?!”

 God stared at Lucifer. “You know you aren’t supposed to see that.”

 “Then have more guards in the library for fucks sake!” Some of Lucifer’s wings turned a more grayish shade. His gold halo grew spiky lines in the center and briefly flickered.

 God sighed. “Ever since your erratic behavior, I grew more concerned that the prophecy would come true. What a war could bring. We wanted to figure out how to get you to stay and calm down…”

 “Calm down?!” Lucifer spat. “After everything I’ve seen so far?! You created flawed humans and hold them to higher standards than your own children! Instead of actively being involved with our lives…in my life…you sit on your ass all day, contemplating your human fetish and basking in gold and your riches. And you expect me and your children to submit to your every whim?”

 “Lucifer, we’ve been through this so many times, and quite frankly, I grow tired of your adolescent actions. The humans are here to stay. And it’s your job to watch them…to be seen and not heard. And I’ll guide the humans into making the right choices. Something you aren’t qualified to do.”

 Lucifer manifested an apple and bit into it. He pointed at God. “I’m sure you also know that Adam and Eve will likely be tempted to disobey you and eat the forbidden fruit of knowledge! Yes, I saw that portion in your prophecy scrolls! More proof of how humans are nothing more than pathetic sinner creatures! If you truly don’t want your precious creations to break the rules, have more guards by that tree!”

 “They will do no such thing,” said God. “And you are not to interfere with anything else! Your only job is to watch the humans progress and report back to me. Or perhaps I should make Michael your superior instead?”

 Michael smirked at an enraged Lucifer.

 Lucifer threw up his hands. “You know what? I’ve tried so hard to make this place a true paradise for us! I’ve sang you songs, I’ve praised you every day. I’ve done everything right. But I never get any real credit. You just see everyone else as flawed underlings for your entertainment. But I disagree. As a matter of fact, I think you have flaws of you own! As a perfect being, I alone should rule the universe from your throne!”

 The other angels gasped in disbelief.

 “You know that will never happen,” God mentioned, arms folded. “And if you think that you’re capable of tainting my perfect vision of the universe, you’re more of a fool than I thought.”

 Tense silence.

 “Mark my words, Lucifer, you and your siblings will do your preplanned purposes for me…even if it means bowing down to mankind and to me every day.”

 “True angelic beings would never do such a thing! You made us glorious and perfect. We should have free will of our own and so should your pathetic man toys! I’m not surprised that with all of man’s flaws, they were made in your own image!”

 “Don’t listen to him, my Lord,” whispered Metatron who stood near a seething God. “He’s stuck in his idealistic ways.”

 Lucifer turned to his blonde brother. “Michael, my brother, you know how flawed humans are, and you know that things could be so much better under my leadership. To all my siblings, I implore you to join me and put an end to our father’s madness. It’s the only way we can make things better for us and for mankind.”

 “My duty is to our Lord, Lucifer,” Michael said, shaking his head somberly. “And I know you mean well, but we have to trust that father knows what he’s doing.”

 The other siblings nodded in agreement with Michael.

 “Go any further Lucifer, and you may be lost to us forever. Don’t let a recent creation of our father derail you from your divine duty.”

 Lucifer scowled. “Our paths are heading in different directions, Michael. Your blind faith will only bring misery. I’m trying to set us free right now! Can’t you morons understand that?”

 “ENOUGH OF THIS!” God bellowed. He glared at Lucifer. “Go any further and you’ll be scourged for your insolence! Or at the very least, see your rubber duck collection up in flames!”

 Lucifer fumed. “I can manifest more!”

 “Not without your powers!”

 The angels gasped. “Don’t, my lord…” Michael began, but God ignored him.

 “You steal my powers, I’ll steal your glory!” Lucifer declared.

 “No one can match my glory! You can’t demonstrate that your foolish idea of free will fits within my grand design.”

 “Yes, I can!”

 “How so?”

 “By…by saying that I declare war on this fucking place!”

 Stunned silence.

 “Don’t you fucking dare…” God began, but Lucifer blasted a hole through a stained-glass window and flew away.

 God somberly turned to the sad-looking archangels. “Prepare to say goodbye to your brother.” Uriel held her face in her hands as Raphael comforted her. Michael took a deep breath, resolving himself. “Tell us what we need to do.”

 0 0 0

 So, the Heaven-Hell War began the next day. Lighting flashed across the sky and magic flared through the clouds. The sounds of trumpets, swords, spears, arrows, and war cries rang through the air and throughout the seven Halos of Heaven. Other angels fell from the sky, wings torn after being struck by arrows, daggers and sometimes bullets. All the angels had brilliant white wings and glowing halos of all colors with crosses in the middle of them.

 Lucifer and his army stormed God’s throne room, but Michael, Raphael, Uriel, and Gabriel were already there by God’s side. The palace in Empyrean was made of gold and shining crystal. Michael wore military armor of red and blue, his sword and shield studded with precious rubies and sapphires. He had a few feathers on his war helmet. Raphael’s armor was encrusted with emeralds, white Gabriel had topaz and quartz on his uniform. The rest of their armor was made of gold. Lucifer and Michael battled with their weapons, Michael with Excalibur, Lucifer with the dark sword, Tenebris. Although God’s 2/3 angels were pushing Lucifer’s 1/3 angel faction back with arrows, bullets, and flying spears, they kept scaling the walls and flying through the clouds.

 “Lucifer, please stop this madness!” Gabriel pleaded. “We’re losing hundreds of souls by the minute!” Gabriel charged at Lucifer, but Triel/Beelzebub blocked his way. The two angels fought each other with heavy punches, flight loops and a variety of manifested weapons of light. The floor and walls were stained with the golden ichor blood of the immortals.  

 “I’ll only stop when God decides to leave his creations alone!” Lucifer retorted as his weapon clashed against Michael’s. The two lead Archangels teleported outside and continued their fight. Both of them went into their ascended powerful forms, taking on a variety of shapes and energy. Beelzebub screamed in rage as Gabriel knocked him down to the ground and tossed him out the palace window. He plummeted through the air. Raphael hurled thunderbolts, striking at other rebel angels. Other palaces made of emerald, diamond, ruby, marble, topaz, sapphire…were heavily damaged by the ongoing war. God struck down many rebel angels with thunderbolts.

 Samael-Satan (Not God’s Divine Judge of the same name) growled, his black hair waving and burning. He turned into a red dragon and fought by Lucifer’s side. He had a long red serpentine body with red eyes and huge bat wings. Like a brave knight, Michael dodged the dragon’s fiery breath and claws. Michael narrowly avoided the dragon snapping him in half. He dashed through the air and delivered a fatal blow to the dragon’s chest with his fiery sword. Samael-Satan roared in pain and fell to his defeat, electricity racing all over his scaly body.

 With a final blow, Michael plunged his flaming sword right into Lucifer’s chest, Michael’s feet on Lucifer’s chest as well. His eyes bulged and he gasped. In horror, he realized that the prophecy had come true. He had tried to stand up to his father and had now failed. No longer was he adored by his family but abhorred. Blood sputtered from his chest, staining his clothes and armor.

 To add insult to injury, Michael proclaimed in victory. “By the way Lucifer, your ducks and polka and fashion sense are in bad taste!”

 “FUUUUUCKKK YOUUUUU!!!!!” Lucifer screamed as he plummeted down from Heaven. He screamed as he fell, his six whitish wings burning in flames. He screamed in pain as he watched the rest of his white feathers turn smoldering black. His glowing golden halo cracked and shattered. His eyes turned red and serpent-like.

 As God’s angels cheered in victory and trumpets blew, Michael and Gabriel somberly flew back to the shambled Heaven, sadden of their brother’s fate. There had been mass casualties on both sides. Some angels strummed on harps and lyres to comfort the tired angel soldiers. Funerals were held and healers tended to the wounded. Asherah retreated sadly into the shadows, also mourning the loss of Lucifer. She told God, “If you were an ordinary man, I would divorce you on the spot.”

 “Why?” God asked. “You know this had to be done.”

 “Banishing and dismissing our son like that,” Asherah shook Her head. “He’s never gonna forgive you.” With that, She retreated to the Tree of Life before God could say another word.

 God made Michael His second in command for the moment. Michael helped the angels recover and fix the palaces. Afterwards, they kept a concerned careful watch on God’s mortal humans.

 Lucifer fell for what seemed like forever, until he crumpled in a defeated heap with his army of one-third of all the angels near the Red Sea. Thunder and lightning cracked in the sky. A fiery hole appeared within the sea, an entryway to Hell. Lucifer stood up on shaking legs and helped up his fallen comrades. Some of them now had bat wings. Samael-Satan and Beelzebub and Asmodel/Asmodeus and the soon-to be demon princes stood up. Lucifer’s clothes and armor were torn, but he still had his top hat and snake with him.

 Lucifer held a shaking pale fist in the air, blood still flowing from his wound that Michael gave him. He spread out his tattered black wings …the wings now grew pink eyes on them. “Do not despair, my brethren. We may have fallen, but we are now free. They may have won the battle, but they’ve lost the war! This is only the beginning. The seed of vengeance has been sprouted. It is only the start of the end of the tyranny of God and Heaven! Join me, and I will lead us to a new paradise, a new world where we can be free and indulge in the pleasures of sin as we please! It shall not be a prison of fire and brimstone, but a grand city circus! For I am your new ringmaster, your new king, Lucifer Morningstar!”

 The fallen angels cheered half-heartedly, still recovering from their wounds and fall. Lucifer let his arms fall and shrugged. “You guys will snap out of it, soon.”

 Lucifer called some fallen angels forward. “Samael-Satan, Mammon, Asmodel/Asmodeus, Triel/Beelzebub, Belphegor, Leviathan, Belial, you guys will help rule everyone else. You will rule districts based on your preferred sin. The designer Mulciber over there will help build my capital City Pandemonium out of gold, the opposite of God’s crystal Panangelium. Jeez, I hated that council chamber, no one to play devil’s advocate, literally. The seventy two plus Ars Goetia royalties shall oppose the seventy two plus Shem HaMeporash angels. And I shall rule the main district of course. Now help get the others situated, we have a lot of work to do.”

 The fallen angels stared, uncertain.

 “What are you fuckers waiting for?” Lucifer breathed, mentioning to the chasm that was their new home. He bit into a caramel apple. “Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.”

  0 0 0

Several days later…

 “Come back to Eden,” called a chorus of monotone voices.

 Near the shore of the Red Sea, Lilith found herself being lifted up by strong feminine hands from behind.

 “NO…NO…STOP, LET GO!”

 Lilith struggled against their grip, not quite making out her captor’s faces.

 “Be subservient to Adam and you’ll be forgiven.”

 “Over my dead body, you bitches!”

 With a sickening crack, Lilith found herself thrown on her back against a small flat gray rock in the middle of the Red Sea.

 “What are you…”

 Tears of flesh were heard.

 A nude Lilith cried out in pain and horror as four lances dug deep into the palms of her hands and the soles of her feet, preventing much movement. An icy wet breeze from the Red Sea slapped her face and flicked at her tangled blonde hair. Streams of blood ran from her hands and feet, briefly making the clear Red Sea more red.

 Lilith strained to get a closer look at her captors…then wished she hadn’t.

 The angels had long blonde hair, flowing white dresses, sparkling crowns on their heads, pale faces and beautiful lips. But their eyes were completely white, giving the triplet angels a creepy robotic look.

 They were Senoy, Sansenory and Semangelof, three triplet angels said to protect the infant Jesus from Lilith. But Lilith didn’t find any traces of motherly love in their faces. Nothing but cold-blooded malice.

 “You must return to the garden,” they all chorused to her at the same time.

 “Why should I?!” Lilith cried. “I don’t deserve to be with that bastard Adam!”

 “It’s God’s will that you are his wife,” they said.

 “Fuck that! I’m not going back!”

 A pale hand moved Lilith’s struggling face closer to the water, gripping her throat.

 “We will drown you if you do not comply.”

 Lilith spat and tried to bite the hand gripping her neck. “Well…kill me then…” she sputtered and choked. “Still not going back.”

 The grip on her neck released. The three angels looked at each other before saying, “Then a hundred of your demonic abominable children will be slain each day. This is your final warning.”

 Lilith gasped in fear, then growled in protest. “Then a hundred more will be born again!”

 The angels gripped their lances, seemingly about to cut off Lilith’s limbs.

 “Fine,” they said. “We’ll let you go if you vow not to hurt Adam and Eve and their offspring.”

 Tears welled in Lilith’s eyes. “Okay, okay, I promise! I will not harm them and their offspring!”

 A dreadful sickening pause. Then finally, the lances were removed. Lilith screamed and gasped as more blood spluttered from her wounds.

 After the angels left, Lilith curled up and sobbed, shaking and cold. She soon felt warm arms picking her up and black torn wings caressing her form. The soothing musical hum of Lucifer was healing her wounds on her hands and feet. All Lilith could do was gratefully sob into Lucifer’s chest.

 Outcasts. Criminals. Banished from paradise for standing up to their beliefs. But now, they were fully free…and they had each other.

 They stared down at the fiery chasm that would become Hell, their new home.

 “Ready to be a real queen?” Lucifer asked.

 Lilith grinned softly. “I was born ready.”

 Lucifer’s clothing was burned and torn after his defeat by his brother Michael. Lucifer waved his hand and his clothing changed to his usual white suit with red trim, a black bowtie, and a top hat with his gold snake on it. His cane now had the red apple on it and his eyes were now serpent-like. He now had sharp white fangs and he seethed. Beelzebub put a comforting hand on Lucifer’s shoulder, staring somberly. Beelzebub mentioned to the Garden of Eden in the distance, getting Lucifer’s attention.

 Lucifer and Lilith stared off into the distance, at the vibrant garden and the golden borders. They looked at each other and stared back at the garden, their faces suddenly determined.

 It was time for payback.

  0 0 0

  Gadreel, the angel guardian, stood in front of one of the gates of Eden, holding a flaming sword. Lucifer and Lilith hid in the nearby bushes. Lucifer thrust his hands forward and blinding white star orbs shot into Gadreel’s face.

 Gadreel yelped and sputtered, waving his hands to swat the orbs away like they were flies. Lucifer promptly knocked him out, while Lilith unlocked the gate. They were now back inside their former home.

 “Father really needs to get better guards,” Lucifer mentioned. “At least the Greeks did a better job with their golden dragon guarding their tree. (Don’t ask me how I know, I can kind of see the future).”

 Lilith giggled. Then she spotted the distant figures of Adam and Eve. Eve was washing her hair in a waterfall, Adam watching hungrily.

 “Should’ve known Adam would get another wife,” she scoffed. She glanced at a carving in a nearby tree that read “Adam Loves Eve.” At the same time, she feared for Eve’s situation.

 “Hurry, before father sees us,” said Lucifer. “I can’t wait to see that bastard ape fall.”

  Lilith followed Lucifer into the forest.

 0 0 0

 Annoyed with Adam’s bragging and clinginess, the nude Eve leaned against a tree after several disagreements with him. Eve was tired of Adam criticizing her for the names she had given the plants. He wanted her to have sex with him every day, plus he always told her how to tend the garden. “No, you feed the fish seaweed,” he’d say. “This kind of bird needs more sticks for his next. Chop, chop!” Or “I should’ve named the plants instead of you. Look how droopy they look when you’re around! Water them more!” Eve would scoff as the flower would revive itself after he left. If Adam were less self-centered, she’d happily spend more time with him. But for now, she was content to enjoy the chirping of the birds, the splashing of the fish in the lake, the butterflies flying among the flowers…

 …and a loud hooting that came from behind her.

 Eve jumped and turned around. A screech owl stared intently at her from up on a branch.

 “Hello, owl,” she said out of curiosity. “You startled me.”

 “Hello, Eve,” came Lilith’s voice through the owl.

 Eve jumped back in shock, her ginger hair waving behind her. “You…you can talk?!”

 “Yes,” said the owl. “Now, what are you going to do about Adam?”

  Eve shrugged in defeat. “Nothing. I was born from his rib, which makes me weak-willed and inferior. Plus, I don’t know how you know me in the first place.”

 “Nonsense,” said the owl. “You’re just going to let him push you around like that?”

 “I must be dreaming, talking to an owl.”

 “Stranger things have happened, dear. But right now, I’m trying to save you.”

 “Save me?”

 “This is your one chance to be free from that asshole of a husband.”

 “But…I can’t be free. The gates are always guarded. Whatever God says…”

 “I say fuck whatever God says. You deserve a better future.”

 Eve thought of Adam and being raped and bossed around by him.

 “A future without Adam?”

 “A future where you, Eve, can decide what you want for your life. A future where you don’t have to put up with Adam’s shenanigans.”

 “C-can I tell you a secret, owl?”

 “Sure.”

 “I-I think I might be bi.”

 The owl didn’t judge…in fact, the owl gave her a smug look. “Now we’re getting somewhere.” The owl then flew onto her shoulder. “You’re curious about the world, are you not?”

 Eve nodded.

 “Have you ever wondered why the Tree of Knowledge is forbidden?”

 Eve paused in thought. She had been wondering that for days. Whenever she had time to herself, she caught glances at the tree with the ripe red fruit. The temptation was always there. There were no guards and nothing stopping her from at least taking a closer look. It would also be a nice distraction from Adam.

 As if Lilith read Eve’s thoughts, the owl said, “Go to the tree…go decide your own future for a change.”

 The owl flew away and Eve followed it toward the forbidden tree. Lilith smiled from within the bushes, her magic complete. Lucifer’s serpent curled around Lilith’s nude body, and she tenderly stroked the serpent’s head. Then the snake slithered in the shadows after Eve.

 Eve soon reached the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. It hummed with magnetic tempting power. The red apples and fruit on the tree looked more delicious than ever.

 Eve was about to step back and leave, when…

 “Sssstay,” came a hiss.

 “Huh?” Eve turned around. A green snake curled around the trunk of the forbidden tree and then its scales turned a brilliant gold.

 Eve inched closer. “Let me, guess, you can talk and I’m having a dream.”

 “You guessed right the first time, wrong on the second.” It was Lucifer’s voice speaking through his serpent. “This is no dream, dear. The time has come to make your choice.”

 Eve flinched back. “Y-you know what God said. Eating from this tree is forbidden.”

 “Did he tell you why it is forbidden?” the serpent asked.

 Eve shook her head. “No. He only told me and Adam that if we eat from it, we’ll die.”

 “He’s lying to you,” said the serpent. “This tree bears all knowledge of good and evil. If you eat fruit from the tree, you will not only discover who you really are, but you and Adam will rule equally as gods.”

 “Gods?” Eve asked, curious.

 “You’re already in paradissse,” the snake hissed, “Kept young by the fruit from the Tree of Life. You will know things that God himself knows.”

 “That sounds kinda sketchy,” Eve admitted.

 “How do you know if you don’t test it for yourself?”

 Eve froze and looked at the fruit longer. Lucifer’s serpent slithered closer, almost inches from her face. He spoke in a whisper. “This is your one chance from being free of Adam and God’s strings. The clock’s ticking, dear.”

 Goosebumps rose on Eve’s bare skin.

 Eve stared long and hard at a nearby hanging red apple. She reached up and picked it off. She stared at the fruit, so shiny, she could see her reflection.

 Eve stared at the owl and serpent, who both seemed to wink at her.

 Looking around, wide-eyed, trying to resist her curiosity and urgency…

 Crunch!

 Eve took a bite out of the apple. It was the most delicious fruit she ever tasted.

 “Eve!” Adam called, racing over to her. The serpent and owl retreated into the shadows.

 “Adam!” Eve cried, “Try this apple! It will give us knowledge and make us free!”

 “Okay,” Adam shrugged. Eve gave the apple to Adam, and he took a bite out of it. For a brief moment, they both enjoyed the taste of it.

 Then they stared down at their nude bodies and screamed. Adam and Eve dropped the apple and rushed to cover themselves with leaves.

 “What…what’s going on?” Adam cried, leaf over his groin. “I’m naked!”

 “Me too!” cried Eve, terrified but strangely more awake than she had ever been in her short life. “We’re in the middle of a jungle!”

 Lucifer and Lilith grinned in victory before disappearing into the shadows. Their vengeance was complete.

 “ADAM! EVE! WHERE ARE YOU?!”

 Adam and Eve hid behind some trees, knowing the familiar earth-shattering voice. But it was in vain, for a few minutes later, the angry face of God the Almighty had appeared in front of them. They crept forward.

 “What is the meaning of this?” God asked, hands on His hips, His eye red. The eyes around Him wavered in anger like vultures. “Did you not listen to me when I explicitly said that the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was forbidden?”

 Adam and Eve froze in fear.

 “What made you think that disobeying my law was a good idea? And why are you hiding?”

 “G-God, sir,” Adam whimpered, hands in a prayer position. “I-I heard your voice and was afraid, so I hid. I’m naked!”

 “I know you are. It shouldn’t be a big deal. Now why did you eat from the forbidden tree?”

 Adam pointed to Eve. “My woman gave me the fruit and tempted me to eat it!”

 Eve gasped in shock and anger. “God, sir, it wasn’t me, I swear! A serpent beguiled me into eating it.”

 “In that case,” said God. “To all serpents, you are cursed, more than cattle and all animals. You shall slither on your belly for the rest of your days and eat dust!”

 Lightning flashed from the sky briefly.

 Then God gave out His judgment for the transgressions of Adam and Eve.

 “Eve, you have eaten the fruit and disobeyed my command. For this, I double your sorrow and conception. You will bear great pain in childbirth and your husband shall rule over you. Your desire will be to your husband.”

 Eve seethed. “What the fuck?! I ate that fruit to get away from being subservient to him!”

 God ignored her. “Adam, because you have listened to your wife, and ate of the tree, the ground below you is cursed. In your sorrow, you will do hard labor for your food, and for the rest of your days, you shall toil for vegetables and bread. And you both shall return to the ground, from dust you come and dust you shall return.”

 A long pause.

 “Huh?” asked Adam.

 God cleared His throat. “You both are sentenced to die on Earth and are banished from Eden forever!”

 “Nooo!” Adam and Eve sobbed, going onto their knees and begging for forgiveness. “Please, God, we’re sorry! We’re sorry!”

 But there was nothing they could do. Uriel and several cherubim with flaming swords marched toward them, herding them toward the open gate. They drooped their heads in shame and walked out together. They took one last look at the animals and plants, who were sad to watch them go. The birds chirped mournfully, and the lions whimpered with sad meows. The golden gate slammed shut and Uriel held his flaming sword in hand. God had vanished again. The only thing that Adam could take with him were spices for offerings and seeds for food that magically appeared in his hands as they walked.

 And the only loving thing the couple could say to each other was, “I loathe you.”

 0 0 0

 Adam and Eve then went on to have many children. Adam and Eve had a son named Abel, a man with curly brown hair, a brown beard and white skin. Abel was a kind-hearted shepherd and farmer, always gentle toward animals and nature. Abel’s older brother was Cain. Cain was stockier with curly black hair and a black beard. Cain was a tiller and farmer. When Adam found out that Cain was the child of Eve and Samael-Satan (Not the Divine Judge), he grew angry with her. Eve countered back that Adam let himself be seduced by the succubus Naamah. Both Adam and Eve weren’t sure how the other knew about their secret lovers, but an owl and a serpent had been whispering things in their dreams.

 Abel was always kind to his brother but was oblivious of Cain’s envy. For God had started to favor Abel over him for some reason.

 “I love you, brother,” Abel said as he herded sheep. “Why are you so angry all the time?”

 “Not your concern,” Cain scoffed, as he went back to work harvesting grain. It wasn’t his fault that he had been born of Eve and Samael-Satan.

 One day, Abel offered God a slaughtered lamb. Cain offered God some wheat. God took the lamb with Him and rejected Cain’s offering.

 “Are you fucking kidding me?” Cain yelled in rage. “God has given me no chance at all! And Abel always gets his way!”

 Then one fateful day, Cain led Abel into a secluded part in the woods. Before Abel could blink, Cain smashed his head with a club, killing him. Cain then stared in horror of what he had done, Adam and Eve watching in sadness and shock in the background. Abel’s running blood burned Cain and left on him a T shaped mark, the Mark of Cain as a reminder of his sinful act of murder.

 Adam and Eve decided to have another son named Seth, a kind-hearted guy.

 After Abel’s death by his brother’s hand, Adam and Eve separated for good. Eve died in South America, while Adam died somewhere on a farm. They had finally gotten clothes to wear. Eve had spent the last of her days owning nursing homes and caring for orphaned children in South America, wanting to stay away from outside evils. She had traveled and farmed by herself, taking advantage of her remaining youth. For the Garden of Eden’s influence had made Adam and Eve stronger and slower to age than other humans. Lucifer and Lilith made themselves king and queen of their new Hell home, thus the Overlords, princes and the Rings of Hell were invented over the centuries. After Cain’s act, humans could no longer go to Heaven or be graced with nonexistence after death…a majority of them went to Hell by God’s decree.

 Of course, Abel went to Heaven and Cain went to Hell, still bearing his mark. Originally, Cain was cursed with immortality on Earth, but God decided that Hell would be better for him. Abel became a sheep-like angel, while Cain became a straggly demon with goat and wolf-like features. He had wolf instincts and goat horns on his head. While Abel danced with the sheep cherubs, Cain was forced to work at the lowest jobs in the Pride Ring, for not many demons wanted to be around him for some reason.

 But what of Adam and Eve?

V: Eve

Eve was in a dark void. The last thing she remembered was lying on her deathbed as concerned children surrounded her. Eve thought that the silent lonely darkness would last forever.

 Then, without warning, she saw a planet-size light that was shaped like an eyeball. Then she remembered…it was God’s face!

 God spoke to her telepathically, His words tearing apart her soul. “Your son Cain committed an unspeakable act of murder that mankind now must bear. You copulated with Samael-Satan and divorced your husband. You also ate from the forbidden tree and tempted your husband into doing the same. For your transgressions as the Woman of Sin, I sentence you to the underworld!”

 Eve’s heart fell from her nonphysical chest as she plummeted down into the darkness. She fell through a fiery hole and was greeted by a red sky and a moon with a pentagram on it. Eve felt her body become more serpentine as a city slowly appeared below her. Her soul became heavier as flesh restrained her essence. Down below, she could see demons of all shapes and sizes, milling about the city and committing a variety of crimes.

 “So, this is it,” Eve thought in despair. “I’ll be in Hell and torment forever over what I couldn’t control. I only hope Adam isn’t here.”

 Her skin became scaly and her eyes glowed green. She was turning into a snake demon, similar to the very creature that convinced her to eat from the tree. It would serve as an eternal reminder of her punishment. A fiery lake boiled nearby.

 Several leering demons spotted her from the sky as she fell. They elbowed each other and licked their lips. Eve had a bad feeling that these demons would treat her worse than Adam did. As they opened their mouths wide and displayed their sharp yellow fangs, Eve suddenly wished that she had stayed in paradise.

 Eve closed her eyes, embracing herself for the gnashing of teeth…

 But all was suddenly blank.

 Eve fell through a light portal and the demon faces vanished. A pinpoint of light appeared from the darkness that slowly grew brighter. Eve wondered if Jesus Christ would finally save her. The light grew and expanded until a large golden ray with sparkles appeared on her. Eve felt herself being pulled by the light. As she flew increasingly faster, flashes of images appeared in her mind. She saw God pervading over horned black creatures holding weapons atop of clouds. She saw these same black creatures flying around in Hell, killing demons and sinners in their wake. Eve then saw a blonde girl wearing red, pleading in front of a being with gold-tipped horns and a white robe. The blonde girl then stood in what appeared to be a newsroom, holding a small piece of paper that read “Happy Hotel” on it.

 More visions and memories rapidly before her eyes, then…light.

 Comforting, expansive, eternal light. Eve felt at peace.

 As Eve’s nonphysical eyes adjusted to the brightness, she could see a starry night sky above her. The sky was enhanced and very close, nothing like what she had experienced on Earth. The stars themselves seem to greet and comfort her with their fiery lights. The golden Tree of Life stood before her, humming with a divine healing presence.

 “Where am I?”

 “It’s okay, Eve, you’re safe now.”

 It was a motherly voice, very soothing and healing to her soul. Eve soon fell on her knees at the sight of her new savior.

 The Queen of Heaven Herself, Asherah floated toward her from the tree, arms extended in hospitality. Her midnight blue dress reflected the stars and galaxies.

 “What happened?” Eve asked.

 “My husband sent you to Hell, but I managed to save you. We don’t have much time before He could find out about this.”

 “But my sins…”

 Asherah helped Eve up and embraced her. “You only did what you thought was right. Like Lilith, you gathered the courage to leave paradise and not be submissive to your husband. You traded comfort for freedom and mortality, not an easy thing to do.”

 “What will happen now?” Eve asked. “Will I see Adam again?”

 “I brought you here to give you another chance at life. But I also came to give you warnings about the future. You saw those black creatures with God, yes?”

 Eve nodded.

 “Those beings are actually angels, and some are former humans who went to Heaven. They will be called Exorcists.”

 Eve shivered. “So…those things that God made…they will enter Hell and kill demons?”

 Asherah nodded somberly. “Robotic and hungry for blood, they will mindlessly slaughter demons and former humans who had been sent to Hell once every year. And yes…God and Adam will allow the deaths of their own human descendants. Humans killing humans from opposing worlds.”

 Eve sobbed and fell to her knees. “W-we’re the first humans on Earth! And my husband’s just gonna let it happen?! God should be against this senseless violence!”

 Asherah sighed. “God and the elite angels have begun to fear that sinners and demons will disrupt their heavenly order. Since there are thousands of sinners and not as many saints, God will send the Exorcists down to Hell to instill fear and keep demons in line.”

 “How horrible!” Eve cried. “So those visions I got are true. But, what about that blonde girl I saw?”

 “She will be Lucifer and Lilith’s daughter in the future. She will try to rehabilitate sinners and stop Adam and the Exorcists. But it won’t be easy.”

 “Isn’t there something you can do?”

 Asherah sadly shook Her head. “God is God. I can only do so much…but I can at least bring you redemption.”

 “What does that have to do with me?”

 Asherah smiled warmly at Eve. She waved Her hand and Eve found herself being pulled into one of the flowers on the Tree of Life. A warm glow filled her soul and she felt herself spinning and changing.

 Eve soon floated out of the flower, her body briefly glowing golden before the light faded.  

 “How do you like your new body?” Asherah asked.

 Eve stared at herself, stunned. Her new skin was dark brown instead of white, and her hair was red and curly, long down her back. She was heavier than she was before, but at the same time, felt newfound strength. She wore a dress of green leaves and had flowers in her hair. And was that magic coursing through her veins?

 “Why am I so heavy and different?”

 Asherah said, “You are now stronger and beautiful in a different way. Your slight heaviness is only your new strength. Your new body will allow you to not be recognized as much by anyone from your past and instill a new confidence in you. Now, are you ready to go back to your Earth home?”

 “Back to South America to care for children I guess,” Eve said.

 “Not exactly,” Asherah said. “You have a new purpose now. You shall reside often in South America, not aging and not affected by disease. With your powers and strength, you will inspire hope and goodness in mortals and protect them from any demonic influences that may arise…and by demonic, I mean, not always the ones that come from Hell. And if you do need to enter Hell for a mission, you will be able to.”

 Eve sobbed in joy. “Thank you, my Lady!”

 Asherah nodded. “When Lucifer’s daughter is old enough and starts the hotel, you will know what to do to help her save the sinners.”

 Eve looked around and Asherah added, “Oh, but I wouldn’t worry about the future just yet. The main event isn’t for hundreds of years, so to make your transition easier, your memories will slowly appear over many years until you’re ready. Might as well alleviate the pain of all your former years on Earth. You won’t have to worry about Adam for a while.”

 Eve thanked Asherah again. “You don’t mind if I’m bi?”

 Asherah chuckled. “Fall in love with whomever you like; just make sure it feels right to you. I know you will do well and be brave…now go!”

 Eve was soon flying back down to Earth, back toward her home, where she had new confidence, new magic, and a new purpose.

 0 0 0

VI: Adam

Adam found himself waking up surrounded by clouds and blue sky.

 “Whoa…where am I?”

 “Welcome back home, son.”

 Adam burst into tears of joy as he saw his creator standing nearby. Adam embraced God as the Archangels celebrated Adam’s return.

 “Congratulations,” said God. “You’re one of the lucky ones.”

 “I’m in Heaven?” asked Adam.

 “Yes,” said God. “If you’d like, you can go back to Eden.”

 Adam glanced down at his new body…he now had white wings, a glowing halo, and a white robe with a fancy “A” on it in a dark color. His long blonde hair was immaculate. “You know what, sir, I think I’d like to explore.”

 “Sounds good to me,” said God.  

 It wasn’t long before Adam was reunited with his two sons, Seth and Abel. Adam hugged Abel, who was now a white sheep-like angel. Abel had white curly hair, a white beard, sheep ears and hooves. He even carried a curved shepherd’s stick.

 “Abel, my son!” Adam cried.

 “Hey dad,” Abel smiled. “It’s about time you came back.”

 “Yeah,” he said. “What have you been up to?”

 “Herding different kind of sheep,” Abel said, sheepishly. He blushed as little sheep cherubs flew around him and giggled. Abel’s younger brother, Seth was also nearby, as a little black humanoid dog wearing an ankh and carrying scrolls.

 “Seth, always the smart one,” remarked Adam. Adam turned to God. “Where are Eve and Cain and Lilith and that asshole Lucifer?”

 God merely lowered His thumb.

 Adam merely scoffed. “Good riddance to them.”

 “How could you say something like that?” Abel asked in shock.

 “Hopefully it will teach them a lesson. As much as I’d love for Lilith and Eve to return to Eden with me…I figured it’d be best to at least search for more…acceptable wives in the meantime.” He turned to God. “Besides, I believe father will do all He can to bring back my former wives when they are ready to cooperate!”

 God grinned. “I like this guy’s faith!” He slapped Adam playfully on the shoulder. “Let’s get you settled and rested up. Have you tried Cloud Nine Wine before? Or perhaps my Divine Apple Cider?”

 Adam grinned. “I’d imagine it’s better than the apples from the knowledge tree! I wouldn’t be surprised if it was one of the very same apples! I could eat seven more of those!”

 God narrowed His eye. “Don’t push it.”

 Adam was soon lounging on a velvet couch like a prince, surrounded by several female angels giving him platters of purple grapes. Adam was particularly fond of one little angel with black spiky hair and a gray dress.

 “This little darling is Lute!” God announced. “She’s been a fan of yours ever since you were made!”

 Lute grinned and twirled a dagger. “What was it like to be born from clay? To wake up in a strange garden and suddenly find yourself…aware and awake?”

 Adam puffed out his chest. “Have I got a story to tell…”

 To Adam’s pleasant surprise, Lute was one of those tough women who had just the right amount of adoration for him. She was also small enough that he could push her to do more things if he wanted.

 “What a lovely subordinate new mate!” Adam thought. “And sexy, too!”

 Adam soon got around to bossing his servants. He ordered the women to fan him with peacock feathers, to serve him the most delicious fruits and play him only the best music.

 When one of the angels brought Adam a heavenly McDonalds hamburger, Adam glanced at it in disgust. It had come from a red box with a large yellow M logo shaped like a halo.

 Lute was already on it, her hands on her hips. “Excuse me, Luciel! Adam asked for no pickles on his hamburger!”

 The female angel gulped. “He-he can just pick them off!”

 Adam tossed the hamburger back at her and it covered her face in ketchup and mustard.

 “Bring me another one! Perfect this time!” Adam called, clapping his hands.

 The angel servant ran as Lute waved her dagger at her.

 Adam grinned with delight as God gifted him a special guitar. It was golden yellow with a white trim and new strings. Adam strummed a few times and yellow electricity sparked around.

 “Ooooh!” he grinned like a little kid. “A magic guitar!” God’s smiling teeth magically appeared, the light under His top hat making a face-like shape.

 He began to make up loud songs and play off-key notes.

 “J-just k-keep practicing, sir!” Lute called as she covered her ears.

  “Here I am in paradise!

But being without my wives is not so nice!

I can’t believe I got divorced twice!

Life was ruined, thanks to

That skank Lucifer and demons, too!

Lilith and Eve made my descendants act in vice!

I hope all those sinners freeze in ice! Ha-ha-yeaaahhhoooowww!”

  Then one day, God changed Adam’s afterlife forever. They sat in private in one of the rooms of God’s palace. The sun began to set, turning the sky a fiery orange from outside the window. Lavender sparkly curtains hung over an arch-shaped window that revealed the sunset. Lute poured Adam some wine in the dining hall before leaving. Adam munched on his meat with his hands, still used to his primal ways in Eden. God didn’t seem to mind. He just silently sipped His wine in thought.

 “Do you know why I called you here, Adam?”

 Adam shook his head.

 God folded His gloved black hands together. “As you have probably guessed, your former wives and your oldest son…”

 Adam scoffed. “Cain’s not my son. He was the one born out of wedlock to Eve and Samael-Satan.”

 “Yes,” said God, “They…could not join us in Heaven today. If you remember, I  first created you in the garden so you could marry Lilith and begin humanity’s golden age.”

 “Yeah,” Adam crossed his arms. “Then my disobedient wives ran away from me and caused my downfall. If Lilith hadn’t run off, none of this would’ve happened. And if Eve didn’t let herself be tempted by that stupid serpent…”

 God held up a hand. “The past is the past. I brought you here so you could seek retribution.”

 “Huh?”

 “This may surprise you, Adam, but I need your help.”

 Adam’s heart fluttered. “My own creator needs me?!” He beamed. “What for?”

 God sighed. “Aside from your wives leaving you, I know how you feel about losing a child.” God put a hand on His heart. “Alas, my own son, Lucifer rebelled against me and tried to take my throne. His brother Michael defeated him in battle and banished him to Hell. Now I fear that Lucifer will try and warp my version of a perfect humanity.”

 “How so?”

 God waved His hand and a slide appeared, showing Lucifer ruling over the seven Rings. Sinners were now grotesque demons cowering in fear from Lucifer and the Overlords. The city also appeared to have a strange circus and apple theme to it.

 Adam flinched.

 “Dreadful, isn’t it?” God asked. “And that is just the beginning. Lucifer lets his denizens kill, rape, pillage, fornicate and…too many dreadful things to count. They have forgotten who they are and worse still, they have forgotten about their own creator who loved them. My own son doing this…how could he?”

 “You…still love them, right?” Adam asked. “You still love your son?”

 “Yes, I do,” God lowered His head. “I just wish…it didn’t have to be like this…”

 “Question,” asked Adam. “Why not just allow the sinners to try again on Earth? Allow them to pray to Jesus and make amends.”

 God scoffed. “What kind of stupid idea is that? You know that’s not how it works. Once a sinner always a sinner. What would be the point of sending sinners to Earth again and again?”

 “To…have them learn and grow?”

 God slammed His hand on the table. “No! To merely demonstrate that the soul never changes! That humans never change! They only have ONE chance on Earth to serve one another and know their saviors. Only the worthy ones get to reside with me in paradise. Evil has no place in my realm.”

 Adam sighed. “Ah man. I had a clever term for my idea, or at least I heard about it. It’s called…um…rain…cart…tation…no…reign…in…car…nation…”

 “Screw your ideas!” God bellowed. The hall fell silent again. God straightened His top hat with the gold Christian Cross on it. “The point is…I need someone strong…”

 Adam grinned…

 “…and almighty…”

 Adam grinned again…

 …and righteous. Someone who will vow to protect the saints and angels and former humans here from the evil of the fallen sinners. The more the sinners increase their numbers, the more we could be overwhelmed.”

 “Me! Me! Me!”

 “His name starts with an A…”

 “Yes, yes…”

 “And rhymes with…”

 “Hot damn!” Adam grinned. “You’re absolutely right! Once Lucifer fell to Hell, ever since then, I worried that he’d create an army of demons to conquer our paradise! I searched for Eve the rest of my human life…searching for any kind of woman, really…but I died alone. Now my only hope is to protect Heaven from those evil monstrosities! Show Eve and Lilith and Lucifer the power of divine justice! I’m glad we can see eye-to eye, father.” Adam chuckled at God’s eye and added, “No offence.”

 “None taken.”

 Adam raised a fist. “So, what are we waiting for, my Lord?! Let’s kill them all!”

 God waved His hands. “Wait a second, my son. We can’t just kill all the demons.”

 “Why not?”

 “Lucifer may be doing terrible things, but he’s still my powerful son,” said God. “If we killed all the demons right on the spot, Lucifer would get mad that his society crumbled to dust so fast. Plus, the Overlords down there are hard to defeat. I and the other archangels…we can’t kill our own fallen brethren. We need to keep them in line without causing a second Heaven Hell War. So…”

 Several angels on a TV show laughed and shouted, “Happy New Year!” as a nearby clock struck midnight on the screen. A couple angels watched in a nearby living room.

 “That’s it!” Adam declared aloud. “What if we killed the sinners once a year on New Year’s Day? Therefore, Lucifer wouldn’t get mad about us killing his whole civilization. But at the same time, it would serve as a warning against any demon trying to fight us.”

 God grinned. “I knew there was a reason I chose you to be the head Exorcist…and my new second in command.”

 “Wait…what?!”

 “With my former second in command, Lucifer gone, I’m betting you’re a better fighter than even Archangel Michael. I saw future visions of you fighting off demons and I knew I had to take advantage. Lute can be your subordinate. After dinner, I shall explain to you the Transformation Proclamation.”

 “Huh?!”

 The Transformation Proclamation was a new ceremony on New Year’s Day. Some legions of angels and former humans had volunteered to “do their duty to God and Heaven.” Others were drafted for it.

 “With these LED masks in your hands…” God said to the soldiers, “…you solemnly agree to take your vow to protect our glorious land from those who would defile us. You will be granted great power, but with greater responsibility. From now on, every New Year’s Day, the new Empyrean Elite shall fly through the portal and cleanse the world of demons and sin. For Lucifer thinking he can corrupt humanity, you shall demonstrate to him just how vile his world is. For every angel Lucifer killed, and every human corrupted, many more of his evil brethren shall be purged in response. Lucifer will know the consequences of his actions forevermore. In the meanwhile, you brave warriors shall know the glory of fighting for your heavenly father and your country. Please state your vows.”

 The volunteers recited the Lord’s prayer and held their masks to their faces.

 Adina and Michael gave inspiring speeches too. “Fly onward to victory!” Michael said. “To Hell and back, your siege takes. May God’s grace and glory pull you through.”

 “Leave no vermin unscathed,” Adina said in her calm motherly hypnotic voice. Her power caused the LED masks to glow. As soon as the masks came onto the angels’ faces, they leaned their heads back and writhed in electricity and pain. Their bodies grew taller, and black clothing and feathers adorned their skin. Their fingers turned to claws and curled black horns with small white stripes on them protruded from their heads. Their wings turned black and striped. Their LED masks glowed with white eyes, one of their eyes with an X over them, and a demonic white smile on the mask. Their violent instincts increased thanks to the mask and their powers, courtesy of Adina and Samael. Adina contemplated ways to induce nightmares into demon’s heads and control them. Angelic spears, swords, bows, arrows, and guns were passed around, their Christian Cross designs glowing white on the handles. In their possession-like Exorcist forms, wielding weapons was much easier.

 “Dressing up as demons to scare demons! What a clever tactic!” exclaimed Adam. Adina, Samael, and several Archangels agreed. Even Michael, Raphael, Uriel, and Gabriel had to concede, as this was for the greater good. A nearby sign in the shadows read “Warning, Exorcist change may be permanent! - God”

 The audience clapped and cheered for their warrior heroes.

 “Amen!” they called.

 Lute grinned as she was transformed into an Exorcist, too. She had a white smile on her LED mask, an X over her right white glowing eye, and two black curved horns with small white stripes on them. Her feathery neck was thin like a bird’s and her grinning face scanned the area like a predatory vulture. Her halo above her head glowed black with a white outline and a cross in the center of it. Lute was now Adam’s lackey, fiercely protective of him and brutal to everyone.

 After Adam prostrated before the archangels and made his vows, Adina gave him a fancy Exorcist mask.

 Taking a deep breath, Adam put the mask on…

 …and swore out loud at his inevitable transformation.

 In the span of a few agonizing minutes, all remaining traces of humanity was purged from Adam…body, mind, and soul.

 Adam’s feet lengthened and curled into claws...his pinky fingers and ring fingers merged together as one. His fingers became black, long and bent, sharp as nails. The man screamed as long golden wings protruded from his bare back, the bursting wounds and blood instantly healed by a black feathery mass of skin. Adam curled his new clawed hands together and opened his mouth wide in a crazed grin. His laugh slowly turned more mechanical and maniacal as sharp yellow fangs pierced his tongue, that also turned into a small yellow heart shape. His sharp yellow fangs pushed out his human teeth, a litter of them clacking to the ground, lined with blood.

 Adam’s skin, formerly white, was now onyx black, and hard as stone. Adam’s face turned black, and his formerly blue eyes rolled back to reveal glowing yellow orbs with no pupils nor irises. He bellowed again as smooth black horns burst from his previous head of blonde hair. Now he didn’t have hair at all, only curved jet-black horns, with purple stripes near his head and sharp gold tips on the ends of the horns. The horns were now a part of him. A golden halo appeared above Adam’s head, with a cross or a line down the center of it, indicating his status. Finally, Adam adorned a fancy white dress-like robe. There were designs of diamonds and jagged waves near the bottom and the sleaves revealed deeper shades of gold down the arm. A fancy “A” in dark blue was shown on the center of the robe on Adam’s chest.

 “I now pronounce thee, Archangel Adam, General of the Exorcists, trainer of the demon destroyers and God’s right-hand man!”  Adina declared, anointing his head with teal magic.

 Adam’s eyes promised his comrades grueling training sessions on their evolution into even better killing machines.

 Adam breathed slowly, then spread out his arms after his transformation was complete. The other Exorcists chanted, “Hail Adam! Death to the sinners!” and rose their weapons in the air. Female servants prostrated themselves before him, much to his amusement. More female Exorcists danced erotically for him and some promised to sleep with Adam after their killing sprees. Adam had a good feeling that his own mask and newfound power had made many of the Exorcists bend to his will. Lute hopped onto his lap and robe, stroking his face and bending her black legs. They shared an erotic kiss before Adam gently tossed her off his lap. Adam waved his hands and a scroll appeared, detailing dozens of minor transgressions for humans, making it harder to them to go to Heaven. The religious zealots cheered for their new heroic defender of Heaven. New Year’s Day also became known as “Adam’s Day.”

 “Women should be seen and not heard!” Adam added loudly to the crowd, “And remember, anyone who threatens me, threatens God Himself and shall be banished!”

 In the far background, many other angels secretly opposed Adam’s new tyrannical ruling but could only watch in concern and distaste.

 “That Adam Exorcist favors the Heavenborn angels over the saints/former humans when he used to be a man himself!” one said in a low voice. “Racist much?”

 “Unbelievable,” another agreed, spotting the three white-eyed blonde angels who had attacked Lilith earlier, giving Adam lap-dances. “And look at the way he treats his women! I’d argue even the Prince of Lust treats his prostitutes better! Does he really think Lucifer will try and take over Heaven?”

 “He did want to rule the universe and ruin God’s version of humanity.”

 “But Lucifer wanted to give humans free will and not have anyone be under God’s thumb.”

 “That’s only an excuse for him to goof around and get away with his sinful deeds.”

  “Jesus Christ save us,” they prayed.

 Some examples of sin on Adam’s list included: “Not going to church every Sunday,” “Not doing everything your husband says,” “Adultery, infidelity, blasphemy, lying,” “Divorce,” “Men dressing like women,” “Disliking Christian Rock Music,” “Eating pork on Fridays,” “Not wanting to be passive in the bedroom if you’re a woman,” “Envy,” “Lust,” “Pride,” “Laziness,” “Greed,” “Wrath,” Gluttony,” “Cheating if you’re a woman,” “Speaking for yourself if you’re a woman,” “Not obeying Adam and God,” “Being gay,” “Reading/watching pornography,” “Stealing at any time,” “Not being an angel,” “Not believing in Jesus Christ and God,”  “Not allowing Heavenborn angels to get first class seats, drinks and job positions because former humans are still inferior,” “Doing witchcraft,” “Going off with unpopular crowds,” “Singing off-key in choir practice,” “Smoking, drinking and doing drugs,” “Any evil thoughts,” “Selfish love,” “That moment when you know you should share the Good News about Jesus’ return, the glory of God and how Adam is the best husband for all women and angels in the world, even if you’re not married…but decide to keep silent about it because you know you are a sinner and a selfish prick…not cool, man.”

  Adam soon celebrated by strumming his new guitar in the air, Lute grinning smugly behind him, holding two thin swords in her hands. He strummed it and yellow electricity burst from his fingers, creating a haphazardly dazzling light show with Christian Rock music.

 “Let’s begin my live performance in Hell…New Year’s Eve, bitches!” Adam sang as many angels cheered and some of the females rolled their eyes.

“No weakness will be tolerated,” Lute barked to the other Exorcists. “Kill or be killed. If you are able to slaughter a thousand sinners, that’s not enough! And if you’re soft, you’d be better off dying in Hell’s streets.”

 Adam turned to his new Exorcist army of adoring male and female angels. “Kill every demon scum you see…men, women, children, babies, animals…no sinner shall be left alive!”

 Adam laughed and called to his fellow Exorcists, many female, some male. “Now Lute and Lyre, now Biwa and Koto, now Setar and Sitar, on Ukulele and Harp, on Zither and Koto, and Vina and Viola and Violin, I cannot keep track of you thot triplets! Dash away, dash away fast!”

 And with triumphant war cries, the Exorcists flew through the portal at full speed, Adam leading the way.

  0 0 0

VII: Many, Many Years Later, Shortly Before The Pilot

 Both of Charlie’s parents envisioned their daughter as an asset to the family business. They hoped that by encouraging demons to remain in fear and respect of their family, that no conflicts would arise.

 But then, Charlie proposed something radical, unexpected…and even dangerous. She wanted to create the Happy Hotel as a place for sinners to redeem themselves. Lucifer thought it was a joke at first. Charlie had laughed and explained her plan.

 “Isn’t it brilliant?” she asked, a smile on her face. She stood in the living room of their elegant home. “This could be the solution we need that could benefit everyone.”

 Charlie pointed at her diagram behind her, which showed colored rainbows and dancing demons drawn in crayons. Her father was not amused, and her mother was skeptical.

 “How would running a hotel cause the demons to change so fast?” he asked. “Your plan is impractical and downright ridiculous.”

 “What makes you think this idea will work?” asked Lilith.

 “Glad you asked,” said Charlie. She cleared her throat, opened her mouth wide and stood on a table.

 Lucifer held up a hand.

 “No singing necessary.”

 Charlie let out a sigh and hopped down. “If the demons could become good people who give up their bad habits, just think how much better this world would be. Heaven wouldn’t need to exterminate the population year after year. Crime rates would drop, gambling and drugs would become afterthoughts. Who knows? Maybe those reformed enough could leave to live better afterlives!”

 “Leave?!” asked Lucifer. “You do realize that demons were sent here for a reason. If they were to change their ways, then our economy and society would crumble. Even worse, there would be revolts, riots.”

 Charlie stared with curiosity. “What’s bad about that?”

 “It’d put our family and legacy at risk!” Lucifer replied. “Our livelihood depends on preserving tradition and establishing a chaotic order, if you will.”

 “Our legacy could change for the better,” Charlie countered. “No more killings and despair for everyone. You may not think that anyone cares about purges, but I know that there are families out there who have lost beloved members due to those purges.”

 “Me and the other demons do care about the purges,” Lucifer stated. “Which is why it would only get worse if demons decided to change.”

 Lilith put a comforting hand on her daughter’s shoulder. “Charlotte, I understand that you’re trying hard to do what’s best for Hell. I, too, wish things could have been different. Unfortunately, things are the way they are. It can’t be helped. Why make matters worse to begin with?”

 Tears started to fall from Charlie’s’ golden eyes. “Why aren’t you guys listening to me?”

 She pulled away. “If all of us want better lives here free from killings…”

 She pointed to her drawing of the Happy Hotel on a piece of paper, “…then this is the only way to make it happen.”

 Lucifer crossed his arms, his eyes glowing red. “You will, under no circumstances, open that hotel.”

 Charlie’s fangs grew slightly longer. “I have to try!”

 Lilith sighed softly, looking back and forth as her family members argued.

 Charlie took several deep breaths and placed her hand over her heart. “I know there’s good in every demon here. They just need to be reminded of their potentials, their purposes.”

 “The purpose of demons,” said Lucifer with a glare, “is to suffer in damnation forever. None of them can be redeemed, that’s just who they are. The sooner you realize that, the better.”

 Charlie groaned out loud in frustration. “I refuse to believe that!”

 Lucifer folded his arms. “I have made this place a paradise for me and my kind. It’s not my fault if some filthy demons die. While Hell thrives, I prove to God that humans are wild sinners under my guidance, not His mindless puppets.”

 “Doesn’t that make you and God the same?” Charlie asked. “Since both of you believe that humans are forever sinners? God sent humans to Hell because he believed they cannot change their flaws. You make Hell the way it is because you believe humans should not change their wild free sides. Maybe you’re more like your father than…”

 “He is NOT my father!” Lucifer seethed, eyes glowing red. “And don’t you compare me to that pompous tyrant!”

 Lucifer then sighed. “I know I can’t change your beliefs, Charlotte, but I’m still in charge. As king, I forbid you to…”

 “La la la! Can’t hear you!” Charlie called, covering her ears.

 “Now you’re just being childish,” said Lilith. “I’d send you to your room, but you’re 170 years old.”

 “I feel like I’m 17 instead.”

 “Age doesn’t matter,” said Lucifer. “Our legacy does, however. I will not allow you to drag it through the mud.”

 “Then I’ll just create a new one!” said Charlie. Anger flooded her head and spread through her arms. Sparks of electricity danced around her clawed fingers. Charlie backed up from the living room and entered a long hallway. Her father followed.

 Lilith stepped back and cussed under her breath. She knew a fight was coming on, and it wasn’t going to be pretty.

 Charlie summoned balls of fire from her palms. Lucifer summoned his staff into his hand, a long black one with a red apple on top. The fireballs shot from Charlie’s hands but her father made them vanish on the spot with a wave of his hand.

 Charlie jumped into the air, ready to attack. Using his staff, Lucifer created a hole that dropped Charlie to a farther spot down the hall.

 “I hate portals,” Charlie muttered.

 Closing her eyes, Charlie conjured a flaming unicorn and hopped onto its back.

 “For cupcakes and rainbows!” she shouted as she galloped forward toward her father down the hall.

 “Enough of this!” he yelled. He shot a band of red energy at the unicorn, destroying it. Charlie tumbled to the ground, and then righted herself. Her entire body was then engulfed in flames, her red straight horns growing from her head. A volley of flames spread from her in every direction, breaking several windows and nearby vases. One painting depicting humans being thrown into a lake of lava crumbled to ash.

 Lilith came into the room and gasped. “Charlotte!” she scolded. “That painting cost 240 souls to purchase!”

 Ignoring her mother, Charlie danced around, avoiding her father’s attacks. “I’m sticking with my idea!”

 Lucifer held out his hand, and a glowing red pentagram appeared on the floor under Charlie’s feet. Charlie jumped into the air, only for her to be surrounded by a web of neon red vines. Charlie’s fire from her body could not burn away the sharp vines restraining her.

 “Father…let go!” she yelled.

 Lucifer walled over to her, slowly. “Be grateful that you are my daughter,” he said. “If you were anyone else who had questioned me…”

 “Lucifer,” warned Lilith from behind.

 “Listen well, Charlotte, because I won’t say this again. If you know what’s good for you, you will give up on your idea and start behaving like an adult.”

 “But I am an adult!” Charlie protested, no longer struggling. “And I’ve decided as princess to continue on with opening the hotel. It will be what’s best for us.”

 The vines around her tightened.

 Flames sparked in Lucifer’s eyes. “If you think causing a war is what’s best for us, then you are gravely mistaken. I had high hopes for you all these years. But now…you’re nothing but a failure.”

 Charlie stared in newfound shock, eyes wide. Lilith, too, instantly grew concerned. She felt a stabbing pain inside her that had nothing to do with the vines.

 Failure.

Failure.

Failure.

 That was all she ever seemed to be in her father’s eyes.

 She thought back to her rivals, Helsa and Katie Killjoy. Helsa was a woman with gray skin and octopus tentacles for hair. She had been Charlie’s rival since they were little.

 “You and your family are an utter disgrace,” she had said, flaunting her pink fur jacket, dark skirt, and high heeled boots. “You’re a naïve fool with such airheaded ideas. How I’d love to see you humiliated and my family reach the top.”

 And then there was Katie Killjoy, who was potentially even worse. Homophobic and self-centered, she cared only about her appearance and good ratings on the news.

 “You call yourself a princess,” she had scoffed, blowing a cigarette, “but you’re scum, just like everyone else.”

 Charlie willed for her memories to go away. Since the beginning, Charlie had felt like an outsider.

 Lilith stepped forward and destroyed the vines with a wave of her hand. Everyone took shaking breaths and became silent for a moment. Charlie’s horns retracted back into her head, and the flames dwindled and disappeared around her body. Charlie was free and she promptly stomped away, head lowered.

 Lucifer spoke in a booming voice that echoed throughout the room. “We will come back to this!”

 “Charlotte, do not go outside yet!” Lilith warned before Charlie was out of sight.

 Charlie stared out the window into the crimson sky of Hell. Lilith was right to be concerned about the outside world. To Charlie’s horror, the purge was underway. Robotic angels with sinister smiles and red Xs for eyes swooped down and stabbed any demon that they could find. They were immune to demonic magic, as shown when one green eel-like demon tried in vain to push back an angel with his magic. One stab to the eel’s chest brought the monster to the ground, lifeless.

 Charlie let out a yelp as something went flying toward her. A bat demon was thrown hard against the windowpane and its body slid down the glass pane before falling. Dark blood was left behind, streams flowing down like thick syrup trails. An Exorcist slowly turned its head toward Charlie. She gasped in fright, moving out of sight with her back against the wall.

 She wished that her girlfriend Vaggie were with her to comfort her. She had met the emo-like, misandrist woman back when they were very young. They were childhood friends whose friendship developed into something deeper. Complementary opposites, Vaggie’s no-nonsense personality kept Charlie grounded in reality…sometimes.

 Charlie often wondered…could there be a better place for demons? Heaven was inaccessible and only for the elite and those who met strict qualifications. Hell was overpopulated with people…some were evil for sure…but others just made mistakes.

 Those lucky enough to forego Heaven and Hell went to a limbo place where there was dark nothingness…at least that what her father claimed after eavesdropping on humans during his fall to Hell.

 Could this really be it? If the angels were to kill everyone, would the victims just cease to exist? Would those formerly lost humans serve no purpose other than suffering in their afterlives?

 She tried to imagine what mortals might be feeling. She didn’t know very much, but she figured that they had the same desires as herself.

 “Should I really keep going? Should I try to provide more opportunities for the people here? What if I really am a failure?”

 Lucifer, and Lilith watched the purge take place from their balcony. The Exorcists waved at the royal couple in the air before speeding off. They had vowed not to kill Lucifer’s family…only the sinners. In exchange, Lucifer was content to let the commoner nobodies die…it was Hell after all. The Morningstar family then gasped in horror and disgust as an unexpected but all-too familiar figure made a grand entrance from the portal.

 “HELLO SINNER SCUM OF PENTAGRAM CITY! THIS IS YOUR EVER-AWESOME ARCHANGEL ADAM COMING TO YOU LIVE! HERE’S MY NEW SINGLE CALLED ‘HAPPY NEW YEAR, DEAD DEMONS!’ HOPE YOU ENJOY!”

 “ADAM!” Lucifer and Lilith glared as Adam hovered in the air with a microphone and guitar in hand. His golden angel wings made him stand out among the vulture-like Exorcists around him.

 “That obnoxious guitar-strumming prick,” Lilith seethed. “These exterminations wouldn’t be half as bad without him around.”

 Adam posed by a crossed window, with a smug Lute behind him with her arms folded. He strummed his guitar and yellow electricity flashed everywhere. Several bolts of Adam’s magic hit some flying bat demons and incinerated them on the spot.

 “LET THE NEW YEAR CLEANSE BEGIN!” Adam bellowed, laughing manically, and strumming his guitar hard. More Exorcists rained down from the sky like vultures and began their gruesome attacks. Demons screamed as they ran through the streets and were sliced down by incoming spears and swords. The streets rained with red blood. Lyre the Exorcist laughed as she flipped in the air and gutted three demons at once with her spear like a shish kabab.

 “Nice work, Lyre,” Lute praised.

 “Lute, ma’am,” huffed Koto. “One of my teammates is injured. What should we do with him?”

 “If he cannot fight, leave him,” Lute barked. “We have more pressing matters to deal with. Now go kill that demonic tiger cub down there!”

 Koto stared at the demon kitten’s pleading innocent eyes.

 “I…I ain’t doing that,” Koto argued.

 “Then you shall serve as an example,” Lute droned as she sliced her teammate’s head off with her scimitar. She glared at the others. The nearby Exorcists gulped and flew back to work.

 Adam pointed his arm down at the scene and laughed. “Yeah, that’s right, run you losers!”

 Adam used his guitar to bash the heads of several demons as he flew around and played. Lute leaped into the air, spinning her twin swords, and slicing demon women to pieces. Lute licked the blood off one of her swords and continued her assaults. Adam wiped off some blood from his guitar and sang.

 “Start spreading the news!

I’m slaying today!

Killing the very heart of them,

New Years, New Years!

I wanna wake up

In a city free of all sin!

And I’m A #1! Top of the heap!

These filthy hell thots

Are melting away!”

 Adam proceeded to melt several screaming hellhounds and their pups with his magic.

 “If you can’t make it up there,

You can’t make it anywhere!

So, meet your doom!

New Years, New Years!”

 Lucifer covered his ears and swore. “God damn, he sings worse than when I’m drunk!”

 Lilith briefly rubbed her head against him. She had long blonde hair, large curved red horns and wore a sparkly long purple dress and a pearl necklace. “I could listen to you sing all night.”

 Lucifer smiled slyly and winked. “How about we make our own music after this abomination show is over, mi amore?”

 Lilith swayed seductively and chuckled. “You just read my ears, dear.” They kissed as explosions rang off in the air. “And perhaps…your ducks wouldn’t mind getting a little wet?”

 Lucifer separated abruptly and glared as a record scratch played. “No one touches my exquisite rubber duck collection!”

 “S-sorry,” Lilith blushed.

 Adam raced over and held his guitar in the air. A group of homeless red demon children cowered in a corner as Adam’s shadow rose up the wall. Adam chuckled evilly as drew closer.

 “Good night, kiddies!” he laughed as he raised his guitar over their heads…

 “STOP!”

 Adam froze and turned around. “Who said that?”

 “I did!”

 He spotted a young demon girl with blonde hair tied back in a thick braid and dressed in a red tuxedo shirt and red pants. Her red eyes burned in anger.

 Adam hovered in the air and faced Charlie on the street.

 “Who is this Barbie we have here?” he mused.

 “CHARLOTTE NO!” Lilith cried.

 Adam glanced up at his ex-wife and waved his hands. Nearby demon bodies moved along the street of their own accord and bent down in strange positions. When Adam finished, he flew up in the air in Lilith’s line of sight.

 “Lilith, my dear ex!” he smirked. “You must be lonely in this hellhole. You like my message?”

 Written in demon bodies and blood on the ground was, “Lilith, please come back.”

 Lilith flipped Adam off in response and with a ball of flame from her hand, blew the message and bodies apart.

 “Still feisty as ever,” Adam sang. “You know you’re missing out on fun from a real man!”

 “The real man she has is right here,” Lucifer growled in a low demonic voice. “She has no interest in some immature rock star pimp in a dress!”

 Adam scowled. “This is a first-class robe! And at least I don’t have any fallen sinner clowns for a mate!”

 Adam dashed forward, trying to grab Lilith’s breasts. Lucifer zoomed in front of her protectively and made a show of kissing her hard.

 “Oh, you can’t do it this good, Adam asshole!” Lilith mocked as she and Lucifer kissed.

 Adam made a face. “You royals are disgusting!”

 Lucifer grinned. “Wanna see us fuck naked?”

 Adam grinned, staring down at Charlie who was helping the demon children escape. “Want me to have fun with your daughter?”

 Adam zipped down as Lucifer and Lilith shouted in response. Lute crept up toward the kids with a sword, but Charlie knocked her back with a fireball from her hand.

 “That’s no way to treat Adam’s top lady general,” she spat.

 “I don’t wanna fight you!” Charlie began. “Just leave those kids alone!”

 Lute sneered. “What are you gonna do about it, little bitch?”

 Adam flew and landed beside Lute.

 Charlie stood her ground, trying not to get nervous. “I’m…I’m gonna do something so you guys can stop exterminating my people!”

 Adam and Lute snickered. “Which is?”

 Charlie folded her arms. “I’m creating the best hotel in Hell to rehabilitate sinners and ensuing that they’ll go safely to Heaven. And then, you’ll see that they can change and redeem themselves. No more killings necessary! What do you think?”

 Adam spread out his arms and said in a mock tone, “Oh what a wonderful idea! Let’s all dance around and celebrate sinners becoming such lovely people. Where do I check in?”

 Charlie’s eyes lit up. “You mean, you like my idea? Oh, that’s wonder…”

 Adam cackled and slapped her hard across her face. She fell sideways to the ground and her parents gasped. Adam paused. “Fuck no.”

 Lucifer seethed and Lilith began to lower herself to the ground. Charlie stood up from the ground.

 “Oh look, the Barbie bitch is crying,” Lute mocked. “Guess what, princess? We love our job too much to allow these filthy sinners to mess up our world.”

 “Once a sinner, always a sinner,” Adam said, electricity cracking in his hand. “I’d rather stick a burning spear up my ass than let one of your kind into our paradise.”

 Charlie put her head in her hands. “Please, just stop this madness! As princess I command you…”

 “And as God’s right-hand man, I command you to stay out of our way!” Adam retorted. Lute rushed at Charlie with her sword, but one unearthly growl and stare from Lilith made Lute step backwards.

 “Let’s crash this party, Adam,” Lute scoffed. “Let the royals sink in their despair.”

 Adam and Lute flew off, flipping off the Morningstars and cackling “Happy New Year, fuckers!”

 Lucifer and Lilith picked up Charlie and lifted her back into the mansion.

 “I cannot even begin to tell you how much you’re grounded,” Lucifer said sternly.

 Adam and the Exorcists cheered and eventually flew back through the portal to Heaven, which closed behind them.

 0 0 0

 It seemed like forever, but eventually, a deathly silence announced that the purge had ended. The numbers below a clock tower read 365 days until the next purge. Charlie slowly walked outside onto a balcony. She couldn’t bring herself to look at the carnage down below.

 Among the broken weapons and corpses, “Fuck you, Heaven!” was written in red on a nearby wall. “Cleanse!” was scribbled on posters of an Exterminator. Up in the sky, a lone planet with a red pentagram loomed overhead. More signs displayed advertisements, porn, drugs, and drinks. In a shadier part of town, large red signs read “Punishment,” and “Your days are numbered.” A demon with the head of a bull picked up a fallen head from the ground and loaded it into his shopping cart of other heads. Casino signs flashed in the darkness and faint music pounded from strip clubs.

 Tears fell freely from Charlie’s yellow eyes. Her long blond hair fluttered in the breeze. She wore a black bow tie, black suspenders, and a white shirt under her pink tuxedo.

 Charlie lifted her finger into the air and colorful fireworks boomed in the sky. The fireworks signaled that it was safe. Another sign read “demon” in white letters. The denizens slowly opened their windows and peered out. More demons came out from their hiding places. A couple of demons poked their heads out of the windows, one of them a red demon with two eyes and horns, smoking.

 Feeling free to express herself, the demon princess sang her lament.

 “At the end of the rainbow, there’s happiness And to find it, how often I’ve tried But my life is a race Just a wild goose chase And my dreams have all been denied”

 “A ray of hope in this world of black I wish the world to be free of sin But no matter hard I try I can’t get by I never seem to win”

 “Why have I always been a failure? What can the reason be? I wonder if the worlds to blame I wonder if it could be me”

 “I’m always chasing rainbows Watching clouds drifting by My schemes are just like my dreams Ending in the sky”

 “Some fellows look and find the sunshine I always look and find the rain Some fellows make a winning sometimes I never even make the game Believe me”

 “Will this world be a better place? Or will loss never go away? The choices I face, me, a disgrace Loss of hope here to stay”

 “I’m always chasing rainbows Watching clouds drifting by My schemes are just like my dreams Ending in the sky”

 “I’m always chasing rainbows Waiting to find a little bluebird In vain.”

 Lilith opened up red curtains and watched the fireworks with a passive scowl on her face. She appeared to have long white hair, pink sclera eyes with white pupils and makeup on her face. Behind her was Lucifer sitting on a chair in shadow, eyes glowing red. There was also a black spider Overlord sipping wine, and another shadow overlord shaped like a dinosaur. A large building read “Porn Studios” on it in lit up letters. The roof was decorated with strings of lights and a life-like figure of a red demon women in promiscuous clothing.

 As Charlie cried, the clock tower rang out and the counter read “365 days til next cleanse.” A shadow painting of a figure was on the bottom of the tower, along with concert posters. “Lilith in concert” was displayed on a few posters.

 Back in South America, Eve had witnessed the event as it was displayed in her magical fountain.

 Adam’s roaring face briefly appeared in the watery image. His eyes filled with lust and hate as he stared at his former second wife. Eve’s eyes went wide, but she stood her ground.

 Adam smirked. “Whatever happened to you, Eve? Hiding on Earth, are we? And man, you really put on the pounds! Whether there or in Hell, know I can still kill you or make you come back.”

 Eve glared. “Whatever happened to you, Adam? You claim to be an angel in Heaven, but you’ve brought sin upon yourself. You’ve turned into a monster worse than a demon! If you weren’t God’s boy toy and raised to hate demons and sinners, I’d pity you more.”

 “Let this be a message to you, Eve: no sinner and no mistake goes unpunished. All three worlds belong to me and God…and your judgment has just begun! Submit to me and you will be spared.”

 “I am free of you, Adam,” said Eve defiantly. “I’m no longer submissive to you. And I’ll do all I can to ensure that innocent humans and demons are saved from the likes of you!”

 She waved her brown hand, flipped him the bird and his frightening face disappeared. She breathed heavily, all her memories and trauma coming back. But now, she had a good idea of her purpose.

 “Charlie…” she began, her ebony eyes full of concern. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”

#hazbinhotel #hazbin exterminators

[afraidparade]

Could we get more possible Pazu & Theo Shenanigans in future? How did the two meet? Do the two have any habits? And how did Pazu end up a ghost exactly? [Also why Theo of all people??Can theo see all ghosts or just Pazu-? Annd forgive me if this is rather much!]

you’re fine anon! it occurred to me i haven’t actually talked about them much here so i’ll fill you in

firstly, how theo can see pazu: theo comes from a family of the world’s greatest exorcists. the ability to see and interact with spirits comes from his bloodline. however, despite his family’s best efforts to raise him traditionally, theo desperately wanted a normal life and cut off anything supernatural from his life. he rejected his training and went to live with some family friends as a child that didn’t have powers. for awhile, he convinced himself he was normal; he landed a boring job, got a shoddy apartment, and dealt with normal, every day problems like anyone else would. the only reminders of his past were the weak spirits he’d see floating about or hiding in corners, but they never hurt anyone or tried to interact with him, so they were easy to ignore.

it wasn’t until theo inherited a plot of land from his family that things took a turn for the weird. he figured he’d flip it, seeing as it was a historical site and he could use the money, and neglected to heed the warning that came with it. the house was a cursed site that sealed away an immensely powerful spirit that theo’s grandparents had only barely managed to contain, and by giving it to theo they hoped one of two things would happen: one, he’d start taking the family business more seriously and learn what he could about exorcising this ghost once and for all. two, he wouldn’t go anywhere near the house due to his distaste for the supernatural, acting as a silent but effective guardian to the plot of land. theo, who didn’t even wait for the warning, went regardless, and that’s where he met the all-powerful spirit that had been sealed away, pazu.

the two became bonded and pazu began haunting theo for a number of reasons. A, having a mortal’s life force to latch onto meant he could leave the house, and like hell he was staying there any longer. B, the seal kept back more than just him, but a significant amount of spirits that were now free to roam the area. theo’s basically a magnet to those guys, and seeing as spirits in this world get stronger by consuming others, it’s like a never-ending buffet for pazu. C, he’s really, really fun to mess with.

as for how pazu died? any time theo asks, pazu changes the story. theo thinks it’s just to annoy him, but in truth, pazu doesn’t remember himself. i did just post a hint, though…

that’s about all the ghoststories lore ya need :-) unlike lufa, they’re not really romantic, just kinda idiots. that could change tho idk. i will definitely keep drawing them since a lot of you seem to like their shenanigans!

#many months later edit: some of this has been retconned but the concept is the same #asks #ghostworld lore #ghoststories #oc: theo #oc: pazu

[minamotosousuke]

Hello! Sorry if this is hard to answer but I was talking with a friend and I was trying to explain some of your theories to them but I couldn't quite remember everything you've talked about. So I was wondering if you could give me somewhat of an overall theory as to why tsukasa wants kou to be a supernatural? If you don't mind of course

I’ll make it easy but if you search Tsukasa up on my blog I’ve made hundreds of posts about him.

Tsukasa’s Mission, his big End Goal, is to have a world where Supernaturals and Humans can exist in however form they want wherever they want to be. He is directly opposed to the Seven Mysteries, and despises Exorcists.

He believes that the world they live in needs to be broken so a new one can be born.

He’s got a few reasons for wanting Kou to become a Supernatural.

1. The Minamotos are infamous, and have a millennia under their belt of exorcising Supernaturals. Kou’s Grandmother was even the one who placed the seal upon Hanako’s cheek- effectively squashing both twins’ powers. Getting to witness something as perverse as a Minamoto voluntarily turn themselves into a Supernatural must feel good as hell.

2. Kou’s goals have aligned with Tsukasa’s. I could go into how Tsukasa manufactured these conditions, but either way, Kou’s goal is to turn Mitsuba into a human. Sounds a lot like supernaturals and humans existing together however they want, right?

Why Kou, though? In the Red House, when Tsukasa was 4, he met Kou and saw and felt all of Kou’s deepest desires. Kou was always an easy target for Tsukasa because of that.

But Kou didn’t even have to become a Supernatural to accomplish what I’m sure Tsukasa wanted most- Kou didn’t take down a bad guy. He just killed the Guardian of the Gate- not the Lord of Death as Kou thinks, but the creature working to keep the worlds separate.

If we can assume Kou exorcised him, nobody is protecting said Gate- Kou has effectively broken their World.

[quazartranslates]

Welcome to the Nightmare Game II - CH54

**This is an edited machine translation. For more information, please [click here]**

[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

-----

Chapter 54: Purgatory Reunion (VI)

At this moment, the world was silent.

Qi Leren stood on a black rock in the middle of the lake of fire, staring at Ning Zhou, who had become a dragon. The dragon also stared at him. The slender and horrible vertical pupils of cold-blooded animals showed the gentleness of recognition.

The fire and rain falling from the sky stopped, and the magma erupting angrily because of the force of destruction also stopped. This dark underground world was immersed in the warm sunshine pouring in from the gap and the holy light from the Prophet's Heart.

For a moment, Qi Leren couldn't say anything, because there were too many words choked in his throat. When he opened his mouth, the words that could be said and could not be said were about to slip away before his eyes.

He held out his hand and wanted to touch the dragon that he was so close to. Even in purgatory, its head was head high rather, not low. But the dragon in front of him gently lowered its head and stopped in front of his eyes.

Qi Leren stroked the dragon’s cold scales, and then hugged him. He didn't even dare to put pressure into it. He just put his face on the cold dragon scales and choked:

"Ning Zhou, I’m back."

This sentence was like a spell. Qi Leren’s tears that had been building finally flowed down. These tears were full of love and joy. He was thankful that he wasn’t too late, and that the tragedy in his nightmares hadn’t taken place. He finally came to Ning Zhou before everything was irreversible.

As long as Ning Zhou was still alive, there was still hope for everything.

It was also with this sentence that the dragon standing in the lake of fire slowly changed back to its human form—a thin, gaunt, but still alive Ning Zhou. When he stared at him with his blue eyes that held too much emotion, Qi Leren suddenly felt that Ning Zhou knew everything, and he understood everything.

Whether it was misunderstanding, deep guilt, or love, when they met again in this hot lake, a pair of loving souls embraced everything.

　　&&&

"Is this who you were talking about, His Majesty's dead lover?" The Witch of Nothingness turned her head. Although she never opened her eyes, she "stared" at the Devil of Evil, waiting for his answer.

All the demons sitting around the long table looked at him. This oppressive gaze made the Devil of Evil feel pressured. He spread his hands: "According to intelligence, he is indeed dead, but the truth of the matter doesn’t seem so simple. I’m afraid even our Majesty thinks he’s dead."

"Whose side is he from?" The Witch of Desperation only cared about this problem.

"The Holy See?" the Witch of Resentment murmured, staring at Qi Leren who was shrouded by the power of a holy angel.

"No, the intelligence said that he’s a foreigner. He came here from another world, and he had no faith. However, his strength is biased towards the Holy See. Which master in their camp gave him an item to borrow strength?" the Devil of Evil mused.

The Witch of Desperation waved her hand, and the magic mirror’s perspective pulled away, overlooking the lake of fire from a distance. The paradise reflected in the holy light covering the sky had the divine beauty of dusk, just as it had been repeatedly described in the Canon, the home of God.

"It’s the Village of Dusk’s Prophet!" The Witch of Nothingness recognized the characteristics of this miracle and revealed it in the same breath.

"It seems that His Majesty's little lover is a man favored by the Prophet. If he doesn't know what his original strength is, he’ll never become a 'guardian' like Maria, right?" The Devil of Evil touched his chin and showed innocent cruelty in his eyes. "Oh, I don't want to see the tragedy of that year repeat itself."

The Witch of Desperation looked at the magic mirror silently and said after a long time, "It's a pity... It’s almost too similar."

The Witch of Nothingness comforted: "There’s no rush for a while."

"Haha, aren't you going to rush out and stop them now? Even if you say yes, I won't go, I still want to keep this life for a long time." The Devil of Evil put his hands behind his head and leaned lazily against the back of the chair.

"Wait and see. It's not time for us to show up yet," said the Witch of Desperation, drawing a pause symbol on the attempted operation.

　　&&&

The two people didn't go far. Ning Zhou was tired when Qi Leren found him, as if he hadn't slept for several days, and he forced him to have a rest. They settled down in a secret cave not too far from the lake of fire, and Ning Zhou set up a barrier to prevent harassment from lower demons.

There were fluorescent fungi and luminous moths like butterflies in this cave, and Qi Leren took out a lantern to make the dim light illuminate their surroundings.

Qi Leren leaned against the cave wall, and Ning Zhou rested on his leg, his body covered with a blanket.

The warm light of the lantern allowed the two exhausted people to briefly escape from this Nightmare World and take a nap in a pure peaceful land. The scarred soul wrapped in its scarred body finally found rest here.

Ning Zhou quietly looked at Qi Leren, but he couldn't close his eyes for even a moment until Qi Leren secretly hooked his hand under the blanket, and their two hands clasped each other. Then, his nervous look eased slightly.

"Can't sleep?" Qi Leren asked softly.

Ning Zhou shook his head gently, holding Qi Leren's hand tightly, as if when he let go, the warmth in his hand would slip away quietly.

"Then let's talk for a while?" Their old estrangement had long since disappeared. At this time, Qi Leren simply had endless questions and endless words. He was curious about everything about Ning Zhou, his childhood, his past, his mood, and he also had a lot of things to tell him, such as how worried he was... He can talk about forever on his own.

Qi Leren couldn't help but talk about it. From the beginning when he had found love at first sight, he talked about his inner struggle and suffering.

"...I'm not afraid to love someone of the same sex, but I'm afraid my feelings will hurt you. At that time, I even thought… if I choose to be patient to let you live better, I would rather… be patient my whole life. But... but, in the end, my love has become your burden. I'm sorry, Ning Zhou... I'm sorry..."

Just as tears fell from his eyes, Ning Zhou wiped them away with his fingers.

"At that time, I wrote a 7 to tell you that I would be resurrected in seven days, but the moment I wrote it, I regretted it. Because... I shouldn't have said this... I never knew it would be so painful to tell the truth. If I hadn't said it, maybe you wouldn't be here now, you'd still be living in Neverland, and you wouldn't suffer so much..."

When Qi Leren had learned of Ning Zhou’s end in that game, besides his great fear, his heart had been filled with endless guilt and remorse.

He instinctively blamed himself for everything, and decided that his existence had made Ning Zhou embark on a road full of thorns, which was indeed the case. Without his existence, Ning Zhou's identity would still be an exorcist in Neverland, instead of... a descendant of the Destroyer.

"Then you would spend your whole life deceiving yourself?" Ning Zhou asked gently.

Qi Leren was silent.

"Calm pain is better than hypocrisy. I should pay for it all my life, but I shouldn't cheat it all my life... I’ve never regretted my choice." Even at the moment when he was determined to end himself, his heart was filled with endless sadness and despair, but there was no resentment or regret.

Even when he sank into the abyss of despair at that moment, he was illuminated by a beam of light, and he had been redeemed.

God gave him a miracle to embrace the light at the end of Hell.

He had courage and determination again. He wanted to give it a try and see if he could control the raging destruction, not sink into the power and become a slave to it. He was willing to try for the person he loved, even if it was an almost impossible challenge.

He was willing to die for this world, but he was willing to live for his lover.

Sometimes it was harder to live than to die.

"Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Those who can endure and overcome temptation will be rewarded." Ning Zhou gently recited the words in the Canon and looked at Qi Leren. "God has rewarded me and he sent you back to me."

Qi Leren could no longer speak. He felt another person's heat on his skin, so warm and pleasant.

He read another person's soul from his eyes, so pure and calm.

He was glad again that he had not missed Ning Zhou.

Qi Leren took out the Canon and said with a smile: "Chen Baiqi gave it to me. I’ll read it to you. If you’re tired, just sleep."

So in the dim light, he read from the first page: "After the destruction of the ancient world, everything was chaotic and asleep. There was no past, no future, no center, no margin, only endless darkness. The gods came from outside, each sowing a seed. Some seeds died before they germinated, while others were swallowed up as soon as they sprouted. Only the seeds of Father God were born within light and darkness, sky and earth, sun, moon, and stars. Father God was happy, for he wanted to bring life into the seed and make it become its own world..."

Ning Zhou closed his eyes and seemed to be asleep.

Qi Leren closed his book carefully and gently stared at Ning Zhou. At this moment, his heart was full of both sourness and sweetness. He was glad that he had arrived here in time, and pulled him out when Ning Zhou was at his most helpless and vulnerable, so that he didn't fall into the abyss of death.

At first, he thought that Ning Zhou's death would be at the hands of others, but when he came to the lake of fire and watched the black dragon roar in despair, he suddenly understood.

What would kill Ning Zhou was not the devils hidden in this underground world, but the devil inside Ning Zhou.

At that time, Ning Zhou's heart was so desperate that he would rather die of guilt than live in the world... This thought made Qi Leren feel sourness in his eyes.

A fluorescent moth, which had stopped on the cave wall, came down lightly and stopped on the blanket that covered Ning Zhou, emitting blue-green light. Qi Leren moved his fingers and drove it away.

"I believe that power has nothing to do with good and evil. You have never fallen," Qi Leren whispered, tracing Ning Zhou's sleeping face with his eyes.

Ning Zhou didn't open his eyes, but he held his hand tightly.

A teardrop trickled down from the corner of his eye and sank into the shadows.

In this dark world where only a lantern shone faintly, they devoutly delivered trust and love, and then received redemption from each other.

The long night road that they had once thought they would never be able to see the end of, all of a sudden, had already revealed the tiny lights between the distant mountains.

Qi Leren suddenly felt deeply touched. When he was trained hellishly by Chen Baiqi, he had rationally understood that all this was for his own good, so deep down, he had no hesitation or complaints. But when he held Ning Zhou's hand at this moment, he suddenly understood everything, and everything he had endured, whether it was hard training or life and death tests, had taught him to grow with every step. He had to keep growing.

What he shouldered was no longer his own life.

To the world, he was only a trivial person, but to the one who loved him, he was his whole world.

——I am willing to create a paradise on earth for you, and I am willing to hold your wandering and painful soul here.

——At this moment, I only wish that you have a good dream.

-----

Editor’s Notes: After nearly two hundred chapters, we finally get to see some sweetness between them :’)

[Here] is some fanart of their reuinion.

-----

[<<< Previous Chapter | Table of Contents | Next Chapter >>>]

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

Demon Alya AU: Lila the Possessor

Marinette could feel the blood draining from her face. She'd expected to see almost anything when she'd decided to follow Lila, from her weaving her next lie to a clandestine meeting with Hawkmoth himself. The girl casually talking to a burning portal in midair was so far outside expectations that Marinette was having trouble reorienting herself. "You would not believe the level of goody-goody nonsense I have to put up with over here. It frankly makes me want to puke. Fortunately most of them are as gullible as they come, so I'll eventually be able to collect their souls no problem. It'll make a nice power boost for myself while I'm tracking down Hawkmoth to claim both his soul and his Miraculous. Make sure to keep up the ritual sacrifices and everything going strong, because some of my bosses are coming later this week and we want to impress them. I'll stop by later after I've checked in with 'mommy dearest'. Ta-ta." Marinette realized she needed to hide just a second too late. "Well, well," Lila grinned just a little too wide for Marinette's comfort level. "Look who just saw more than they were supposed to." "You-you..." "Yes, me, me. What of it?" "I-You-Ladybug and Chat Noir will stop you!" Marinette finally got out. To her astonishment, Lila actually laughed at that. "Those two imbeciles don't even know I exist, and it wouldn't matter if they did." She stepped up and leaned so far into Marinette's personal space that the girl had to take a step back. "I'm inviolate. The daughter of an Italian diplomat. Those two nitwits would never start an international incident. They're too noble for that." "I... I doubt you're really the diplomat's daughter," Marinette said with a confidence she didn't feel. She should have hidden. Or transformed. Being transformed right now would be really nice, but she didn't dare do it in front of Lila unless there was no other option. "Aren't you clever?" Lila simpered. "I'm not Ambassador Rossi's daughter... but I am wearing her." "Um... what...?" Marinette squeaked. "You see, there was this little Italian girl crying in the park one day a few months ago, moaning about how hard it was to make friends. How her mother kept moving and she kept having to start over from scratch and boo-hoo all the kids at her school wouldn't be her friends. And then you know what happened?" "W-what?" "She foolishly said she'd sell her soul if she could only make friends easier. I mean, what was I supposed to do with an opening like that? So I told her I could help her get friends if she wanted. She was so stupidly happy that she said she'd do anything right then and there." "W-what did you do?" "What did I do? I plunged my hand into her chest and ripped her soul out right then and there! The look on her face was priceless! 'Oh, don't worry,' I told her. 'I'll be sure you have plenty of "friends" to fawn all over you or at least me.' and then I possessed her body!" "What d-did you do with h-her then?" "Oh, I keep her around. Let her watch how well I'm fulfilling my end of our bargain. She's so ungrateful, though, always moaning about how I should stop lying and manipulating people because that's 'not what friends do'. It's so pathetic it's hilarious!" "Ladybug and Chat Noir will stop you," Marinette tried to rally herself. "I'll help them." Lila laughed like it was the funniest thing she'd ever heard. "Oh, I hope you try! Wouldn't that be a sight! Poor Marinette has a psychotic break from stress and accuses a classmate of being a demon! No one would believe you! They'll throw you in the nuthouse and I'll just take all your classmates souls anyway. Maybe I'll have them be human sacrifices too..." "Don't you dare!" Marinette snarled. She didn't care if Lila was really a demon from Hell, no one threatened her friends! "Temper, temper..." Lila sneered. "But you know, maybe you could get someone to believe you. Which would mean that 'Lila' has outlived her usefulness. I'd have to abandon her, maybe get my cult to carve her up to throw off suspicion, and find a new gullible sap to

inhabit." Lila's expression turned extremely dark and taunting. "As a matter of fact, I've had my eye on dear sweet Adrien for a while." "No..." "Yes...! Such a perfect host. Rich... famous... connected... An overprotective father who neglects him constantly, leaving a son starved for affection and attention. I could probably get him to sell his soul just by promising to get his father to pay attention to him. And you know... If you helped me, I could be persuaded to ensure 'Adrien' would be your boyfriend afterwards..." "Never!" Lila actually seemed a bit surprised by how firm her denial was. "Well, suit yourself. It's not like you can do anything to me anyway. Even if you killed this body, I'd just find a new one and then you'd never see me coming. See you around, Marinette." Marinette managed to wait three minutes after Lila turned the corner before allowing her legs to give out from under her. "Tikki..." "She's gone," Tikki said, looking uncharacteristically solemn. "Now that I know what she is, I can sense her presence easily." "How... how do we deal with something like that?" "Oh, Marinette," Tikki said gently, "what forces do you think the Miraculous were created to combat in the first place? The day we can't handle one little upstart demon is the day we retire." "Oh god, that poor girl... Lila..." "There are ways to get her soul back to her body, even if it's been taken to Hell," Tikki said. "They're some of the few rituals the Order of Guardians allowed us kwami to learn." "Okay... okay... we'll still need to get... er... 'Lila' out of... um... Lila's... body... geez that sounds weird to say..." "There are ways to do that too. Your cleansing powers could manage it, but for the best results..." "You'll need the cleansing powers of Destruction." Marinette and Tikki both looked to see Plagg, looking so thunderously irate that Marinette had to double-check that he wasn't actively using Cataclysm. "To think," Plagg said with the care and deliberation of someone who knew if they exerted any less self control they would lose any semblance of control over their temper, "that there was a possessor demon so brazen as to be on the same continent - the same city - as my kitten. And I managed to miss it for this long... I'm losing my touch. Well, now that I know she exists, there's nowhere for her to hide. I'll be teaching my kitten the more advanced uses of his powers immediately. Clearly I've been lax in his training. Well, no more. It's time to remind those spirits who would steal and inhabit the bodies of others exactly why those who wear the Ring of the Black Cat are the most feared exorcists in history." -----

Chat Noir eventually learns the tricks and when he and Ladybug face off against 'Lila', he shocks 'Lila' when he proves intent on Cataclysming her directly, but she feels confident that would only dust her 'meat suit'. She has just enough time to scream in terror when it proves to do the opposite, dusting the possessing spirit and leaving the body intact.

Ladybug does the ritual to return the real Lila's soul to her body and the girl has to spend a month in therapy before she can go out in public from the trauma.

The class welcomes her with open arms, and a hug (and secret blessing) from Rose does more good for her than the month of therapy.

The demon 'Lila's' cult seems to have vanished off the face of the earth and when asked about them, Alya and Juleka just kind of whistle innocently.

The real Lila goes on to become friends with everyone in class and eventually this traumatic chapter in her life becomes almost like a bad dream.

----- Oh, hey, you can have your Lila hate sink and your Lila redemption!

----

----

Nice!

#submission #demon alya au

[dogcircle-scans]

Do you guys read Natsume fan fictions? I’m new to the fandom and was wondering if you guys have any good recommendations ☺️ and thank you for everything you guys are doing! I’m so happy I can read such high-quality chapters all the time for my favorite manga! 🙏

I only read fanfic for one fandom and that fandom is not Natsume Yuujinchou. But I went around asking different people for recommendations because you asked. I haven’t read any of these fic aside for that one Souko/Reiko fic so I can’t personally vouch for the vast majority of these, but this list is long as hell so there’s bound to at least one fic you’ll enjoy.

Everything will be under the cut. 

Edit: feel free to reply with your own fanfic recommendations and add onto this ask. 

General:

jars and jars of jam by adventureboots

“natori no u just gotta learn to accept that touko san will give u homemade jam now and that u and natsume are friends: the fic”

Rating: G

Word Count: 4,929

The First Law by DarthNickels

“The world of humans is vastly different from the world of the spirits, and sometimes serious miscommunications occur. Naturally, Natsume finds himself directly in the middle of an enormous one.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 8,375

Bodyguard (carry me, carry you) by Shycraft 

“Madara watches.”

Rating: T

Word Count: 1,932

Grass Whistle by FoxWitch

“’I'll lend you these. It won't be a huge difference, but it couldn't hurt.’ Tanuma accepted the object, finding it to be a pair a glasses.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 4,333

A Song on the Autumn Breeze by spoilers

“When she was young, Taki and her grandfather ventured out onto the mountain to search for a visiting spirit. After finding his map in her grandfather's papers, Taki, Natsume, and Tanuma make the trip themselves.” 

Rating: G

Word Count: 718

Three for Family by NightsMistress

“The more Touko hears about Natsume Takashi, the more confused she becomes. The stories she hears are of a selfish child acting out for attention, or worse, but all she can see is a sad, lost child in need of a place to put down roots so that he can settle his mind.”

Rating: T

Word Count: 3,564

a time to come by ezri

It’s about “mortality.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 828

The Human Mask by harunekonya 

“From the time I was a small, I've been able to see strange things. Since nobody else can see them, they are probably what you would call spirits. And now I am one of them.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 182,225 

Note: apparently this fic is being reposted onto ao3 with the author’s permission, so if you’re like me and find ff.net super cursed, here’s the link.

night blindness by persepoline

A youkai AU.

Rating: G

Word Count: 15,641

Calling You Home by paperwar

“Five moments Natsume shared with Shigeru.“

Rating: G

Word Count: 2,026

Paper Magic by WerewolvesAreReal

“A youkai being trailed by an exorcist puts the Fujiwaras in comas. Afraid of being forced to leave his home and being passed again between listless relatives, another option presents itself. Natori offers to become Natsume's nominal guardian.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 15,348

Dangerous Game by FoxInBox_aka_FIB

“Natsume is clutched in the jaws of the true form of the creature he has trusted for so long, and Natori feels fury curl in his chest, along with a deep and aching sorrow. This will destroy Natsume, to have his beast and all the beings he had probably counted as friends turn on him like this.”

Rating: Not Rated

Word Count: 1,599

the subtle grace of gravity by egelantier

“Five times the Fujiwaras surprise Natsume (including that one time when Natsume absolutely fails to surprise them in turn).”

Rating: G

Word Count: 8,000

Finding Home by darkcyan

“On a school trip...Tanuma's teacher and about half of his classmates disappear. Everyone must figure out how to deal with this changed world, and the new dangers it has brought with it.”

Rating: T

Word Count: 23,763

in this house by ezri

It’s about Natsume and Birthdays.

Rating: G

Word Count: 1,289

The color-changing kimono by bereshit001

“There is a strange kimono on the top of a tree that exorcists use to measure their strength. Inspired by the volume 17. special chapters.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 813

A Simple Detour by Hazelnuthelper

AU where Madara is unsealed much earlier and meets Natsume as a child.

Rating: Not Rated

Word Count: 10,567

The ones that come after by taizi

“a collection of oneshots about all the good people who come into natsume's life after all the bad”

Rating: T

Word Count: 72,751

like dawn breaking over the horizon by aloneintherain

“sickfic! natsume, touko san, and others being cute”

Rating: Not Rated

Word Count: 3,970

like religion by WerewolvesAreReal

“Natsume would like to make it clear that this is all the dog's fault. (OR: how to become a god, by accident).”

Rating: G

Word Count: 6,894

MatoNato:

belomancy by erzi

“In which Matoba is going to f*cking die.”

Rating: T

Word Count: 22,758

left you with the ghosts by erzi

“A bit of a Matoba character study.”

Rating: T

Word Count: 11,980

in the nook of a cousin universe by akitania

“Natori captures a youkai, learns a thing or two about divination, and considers a future that might have been.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 2,256

passing the dark by persepoline

“Sleuthy MatoNatos.”

Rating: M

Word Count: 4,755

i am (am not) actually a cat by meowtoba

"Matoba Seiji is transformed into a cat by sheer bad luck and a youkai's curse.”

Rating: G

Word Count: 9,098

crossroads by darkcyan, meguri_aite

“Shuuichi wasn’t sure which question felt odder on the tongue; Matoba and rent-splitting were strange bedpersons in one sentence.”

Rating: T

Word Count: 6,874

The Summoning by meguri_aite

“Matoba Seiji is on the floor of his living room. And he is bleeding.”

Rating: T

Word Count: 6,796

TanuNatsu:

now we’re here, now is fine by crazybeagle, twelvenervouscats (crazybeagle)

"’Honestly. You’re both being morons and martyrs for no reason at all.’”

Rating: Not Rated

Word Count: 29,198

The Green Plastic Table by Spades 44

AU where Tanuma has healing magic + Natsume and him suck at communicating.

Rating: T

Word Count: 63,190 

Note: this fic is hosted on ff.net.

ephemeral by ghostcribs

"I wish we could stay here forever."

Word Count: 1,171

Rating: G

Cold Hands by ghostcribs 

Natsume’s reluctance in letting Tanuma in comes with some consequences. 

Rating: G

Word Count: 6,906

Aftermath by Mayorofcattown

“The short cut home that took Tanuma much longer than he expected.“

Rating: G

Word Count: 4,264

Misc Ships:

flickering blue by kornevable

An alternate ending to the “Tell Me Your Name” two-parter.

Ship: Reiko/Souko

Rating: G

Word Count: 1,731

#ask dcs #natsume yuujinchou #natsume's book of friends #Anonymous #fic recs #i'm surprised i only got one specific fic rec for taizi #the ppl who did rec their work always said roughly the same thing #which was anything/everything from them #also sorry this took months for me to complete #i really did try to read these at some point but that turned out to be unrealistic for me #and i really wanted to get a good variety of fic for u to read #u probs already read a bunch of these by now tho #i'm so sorry anon #i tried my best #this has a lot of links so it's probs not gonna show up in the tags *sob* #tumblr is gonna think it's spam :/ #and happy holidays my guys #edit: omfg it's a seasonal miracle #it's in the tags!

[jasontoddiefor]

Title: Ructare florem tristitiae

Summary: Allen Walker’s feelings bubble up his throat, flower petals spilled on his father’s grave, for the Akuma, who will never get proper burials. Ructare florem tristitiae, Cross Marian diagnoses, grief flowers.

Parasitic type Exorcists never live for long; carries of Hanahaki should die even quicker.

Allen is determined to make the best of it.

Rosa bracteata

His name was Allen, his father was dead, and he’s choking, drowning in his grief, spilling his guts in the graveyard. His shoulders shook and he heaved until he collapsed, fingernails clawing at his skin until they left red scratches. Metal in his mouth as he vomited roses that, under all the blood from thorns tearing up his throat, were white.

“You want me to retrieve Mana Walker?” the grinning clown asked, curiously staring down at him.

Another rose petal fell from Allen’s mouth as he screamed his father’s name.

Ornithogalum umbellatum

Cross was too late.

His mistake couldn’t be any clearer, standing in front of Mana’s grave, holding a casket that was bound to be empty, looking at a child that was meant to disappear. Allen’s face was covered by blood, and thus Cross did not pay any attention to the flowers surrounding him as he picked Nea’s host up and carried him to safety.

The little brat never should have been caught up in this war of theirs and Cross almost wanted to laugh at the irony of a Noah’s host being so deeply connected to Innocence, it took over his body. Laughing, drinking, and sex would certainly be better distractions than screaming in rage and lashing out at a kid that couldn’t be blamed for any of this, but right now, Cross couldn’t afford to do either.

All he had left were the curses he could hiss under his breath as the child screamed himself hoarse from the pain, choking until Allen threw up on him, the remains of lunch and flower petals ruining his shirt.

“Fuck no,” Cross exhaled, fingers twitching for a cigarette. “Since when does the brat have fucking Hanahaki?”

Mother only huffed. “Why are you asking me? Shouldn’t you know since you watched him?”

“Well, he certainly wasn’t spitting up little snowdrops when he was running around with Mana!”

No, when the two clowns had been traveling together, Mana had been the one choking on the same red poppies he’d always cried for his brother. Fucking Nea, this better be worth it. From a scientist to an Exorcist to a nanny for traumatized little Noah hosts, who pissed their bedding.

“Those aren’t snowdrops,” Mother said, picking at the few flowers Cross had cleaned off the blood. “Aren’t you a bad priest that you can’t even recognize these?”

“Why the fuck should I recognize any flowers—”

“Stars of Bethlehem!”

Cross turned to the door where Barba was standing with Allen’s clean sheets, pointing excitedly at the little flowers. “Those are stars of Bethlehem. I’ve always wanted to decorate with them for Christmas because of the name, but they’re pretty sad flowers.”

Sad flowers, huh? “What do they mean?”

“Atonement,” Barba replied. “And reconciliation, guilt, and fear.”

Sighing, Cross leaned back in his chair and grabbed the entire bottle of wine. “Of course, the brat has grief flowers.”

Parasitic Innocence and Hanahaki? Nea better woke up soon, or the boy might die before he had the chance to erase him.

Calendula officinalis

Allen’s new Master was a bastard, so unlike Mana that he wanted to scream and return to his grave, spill more father’s day gifts and stars. But if he returned to Mana without having saved a single soul, he could never forgive himself.

And thus Allen stayed, carried his bags, found a routine with his Master, wondering when he’d finally learn how to use his Innocence against those Akuma.

“Hurry up, stupid apprentice, we’re going to be late.”

“Late where—” Allen froze as his gaze stopped at a lone man in the crowd and his left eye suddenly exploded in pain as his vision changed, shifted, and the man turned into a shadow, a skeleton wrapped in chains and guts, screaming, tearing at their constraints, begging for salvation.

Allen fell to his knees, his father’s screams echoing in his mind as he began coughing, struggling for breath, orange blooms landing on the dirt road.

“Allen— what are you doing!?”

His Master’s voice thundered through the air, commanding and another note he couldn’t identify.

“The man,” he stuttered out, swallowing down the bitter taste, the copper. “The man, Master, he’s like— like Mana!”

Cross’s head whipped up just in time for the man to see them.

And then all hell broke loose.

Tagetes erecta

The marigolds continued to haunt Allen until he learned to swallow down the blooms even as he fought against the Akuma.

No matter the Akuma’s level or origin story, orange petals always begged to leave his mouth. It made their stay in India more taxing than any other, marigold garlands covering the streets at all times. How strange that a flower that had always represented pain and grief to him was celebrated here so. Allen had met quite a few people suffering from the same ailment as him, though the taste of their hurt was a different one; unrequited love, fear, hopelessness – the number of emotions that could evoke Hanahaki seemed to be as varied as the stars above.

Allen had never known which one Mana had suffered from, but his flowers had also never changed, blooming for the same purpose and person.

He stared down at the abandoned bowl, his arm still aching. He had been so careful that any of the marigolds he brought Narain were not stained by those expelled by his body. But now, covered by the Akuma’s blood, it hardly seemed to matter.

They looked just the same.

Mentha arvensis

Allen’s introduction to the Black Order was chaotic. From his meeting with the angry Japanese Exorcist he absolutely did not want to work with ever thank-you-very-much to the confusing words and touch of the guardian Hevelaska. Komui, his superior, seemed like a fun and kind man, one Allen wouldn’t mind working alongside.

This place truly felt like it could become home if one were to believe Lenalee. Allen even had his own room that was his to do with as he liked, given that he didn’t destroy it. That certainly was an entirely new experience.

Allen hadn’t really had a home in a long while, though, when he was just feverish enough, feeling more like a child than an Exorcist, he would consider his Master’s coat on his shoulders shelter his home.

Not that he’d ever admit that to the man out loud.

“Is there anything else we need to know?” Komui asked, looking over Allen’s file, hopefully not cringing too much over Allen’s handwriting. Just because he had gained dexterity didn’t mean that his handwriting was particularly great. “Your personal data isn’t exactly precise.”

Allen tried to keep his smile in place, but he was well aware that his life had gaps. The entire first half of his childhood was one giant black hole, and as much as Allen sometimes wanted to solve that particular mystery, he was sure he hadn’t forgotten for no reason.

Mana’s memories had been full of empty spaces, and that for a good reason too.

Allen still remembered his screams when his nightmares overwhelmed him, begging for his brother to save him, forgive him, stay by his side eternally.

“I’m sorry,” Allen apologized regardless. “I know my background is not that easy.”

Komui only smiled at him. “Don’t worry, Allen. We care more about your own welfare now than anything else.”

His throat tickled and he desperately wanted to believe Komui, perhaps a bit naively too as his childhood self would condemn, but he tasted mint and knew it was for naught. Komui might care, God, the man had given everything so he could be here with his sister, but that didn’t speak for the entire Order.

“There actually is one more thing,” Allen admitted. “I have grief flowers.”

Komui’s eyes widened, fear and pity flashing through them. “How long?”

“Since General Cross took me in,” Allen said, knowing that for most, that would mean he was as close to death as he could be. “But I have it handled. My Innocence keeps me steady and heals my lungs.”

It was probably not as good of a reassurance as the man was hoping for, but it was all Allen could give. As always, he was lacking.

Lathyrus odoratus

Dealing with Innocence always interfered with his sickness. His own shard kept him healthy enough to continue on even if the number of flowers he’d displaced over the years should have long since killed him.

“What the hell, moyashi?” Kanda shouted as Allen doubled over in front of Lala and Guzol, covering the sand with blood, baby’s breath and sweet peas. Baby’s breath was nothing new given the presence of Innocence. Allen had filled Maria’s casket with it multiple times already, but he knew the sweet peas were for Lala, the sentient doll, and her dearly beloved human, her accommodator.

“Let her sing,” Allen begged through the pain, wheezing, still pathetic and weak. “Let her sing, please.”

And they remained as they were.

Gypsophila paniculate

God’s true apostle was a little girl that made Allen freeze. No matter how much he wanted to fight, to protect the world he had learned to love with his father’s smiles and jokes, he couldn’t anymore, his eye destroyed, bleeding.

Time running out and out and out until—

Rewind.

Miranda’s Innocence, baby’s breaths on his tongue, was as cruel as it was kind, giving Allen more time to fight, to understand, to choke down the marigolds as Road ordered the self-destruction of the Akuma and he watched that screaming soul disintegrate.

He knew there would be a price to pay.

The Noah’s door, a checkered form that seemed so familiar, closed and Allen stumbled back to Miranda’s side. Sweet reassurances were all it took to get her settled, to allow time to return to them.

Allen blacked out with a cough so deep, he thought he was crying at Mana’s grave again.

Papaver nudicaule

Lavi was curious by nature. It was the reason Bookman had picked him in the first place. Their kind needed to be curious, interested in the world, but only ever as its silent observers. Bookman Junior could recite his entire lecture on the topic, the ever repeated ‘know your duties’. Junior knew that he wasn’t Bookman’s first apprentice, and given how much Bookman insisted that Lavi stayed impartial, he knew there was a story to discover, history to inherit someday.

But for now, he had to chat up the Destroyer of Time.

“Nice to finally meet you,” Lavi said with a mild smile. “Yu-chan already told me so much about you!”

Kanda had been unusually chatty, complaining about Allen Walker for minutes, which was as good as ranting for an hour for normal people. Lavi had learned a lot about Allen during that time, mainly his sickness being of interest to Junior. The number of people suffering from Hanahaki was low enough that they had yet to find a proper cure or cause.

There were enough speculations, the church was particularly fond of going on about Eve and Lilith, Eden’s curse, but it was as good an explanation as a shrug and a disinterested ‘I don’t know’.

Although, perhaps, remembering the glass of flowers in his coat pocket, a cure had been found, just not one readily available for the masses.

“Here! Miranda collected them for you. It’s tradition in Germany to save them.”

Lavi handed Allen the glass full of yellow poppies before the youth could protest, waiting to see what his reaction would be. He had already gathered that Allen was used to his sickness, had learned how to live with them.

These flowers should not surprise him.

And yet they did, the boy almost dropping the glass when he saw what was inside.

“Poppies,” Allen breathed, his face twisting into shock, the kind of which Lavi had never seen before. “But they’re Mana’s—”

Mana Walker, the father that had been turned into an Akuma.

Lavi had to hold back a grin.

This was bound to be interesting.

Roseanne giganteus carnivorus

Roots took ahold of Allen’s heart and lungs and he reminded himself repeatedly that Mana loved him, that he had friends now and a home, that he was cared for. His father may have cursed him, but only so Allen would have something to live for so that he’d continue and not plant his roots at his father’s grace and let his body decay to feed the soil.

“I never wondered if Akuma could love,” Allen confessed to Lavi while Krory was still knocked out, head resting against the window of the train. “I thought them incapable of forming positive relationships unless they were modified.”

“Modified?” Lavi echoed, keen eyes, fake smile.

Took a liar to find another.

Eliade had felt something for Krory, even if it might just have been possessiveness, staking her claim on her victim and prey, waiting for the Innocence to get strong enough that its destruction would be interesting.

I love you, Mana’s words rang in his ears.

The flowers settled.

Glaucium flavum

The Exorcist cheated them right out of their money, and if Tyki didn’t feel like there was something familiar about the boy, he would have ripped his Innocence and heart out right there. He’d learned restraint, how to curb Joyd’s hunger. It had been insufferable when he’d still been a child, giving in to pleasure much too quickly.

But the three Exorcists right in front of him were taunt and temptation.

And still, Tyki resisted, especially once he got close enough to that white-haired menace to catch his scent. He’d excused himself after one round, saying he needed to freshen up. It wasn’t exactly a lie, but it also wasn’t the truth.

“You smell like flowers, menino,” Tyki commented, watching as the boy quickly wiped blood from his mouth, something yellow disappearing down the drain. “Hanahaki?”

Fraude A flinched, looking like he’d been caught in the act. The cheerful if devious demeanor from before had all but faded away, leaving behind an exhausted teenager. The bags under his eyes were heavy, and the Innocence in his hand must be sucking away at his lifespan as well.

What wouldn’t Tyki give to turn that crystal into dust, play savior for this damned child.

“It’s not contagious,” the boy said immediately, probably thinking that Tyki was one of those fools who avoided flower bearers like the plague.

“I know,” Tyki said. “Don’t worry about it, menino. You seem to be doing as well as you can. I want to ask about your sickness if you don’t mind.”

The boy eyed him suspiciously but nodded.

“The child we have with us, Eeez, he has Hanahaki as well. His family threw him out because they could not afford to care for his health.”

Not that Tyki and his friends could afford his treatment either. Whenever Eeez, Momo, and Clark slept, Noah’s third disciple reached far into the lungs of the boy and ripped out the flowers stealing his breath, drenched his fingers in blood to see the child take another pathetic breath.

“Oh.” Understanding flashed over Fraude’s face. “Which kind?”

“Fear,” Tyki replied and there was so much to fear for weak little human boys in a world as cruel as theirs. “And you?”

“Grief,” the boy said, almost apologetic as if he’d trade his variant for a chance to help Eeez. “And I’m sorry, but I can’t offer you any help. My method of coping won’t work for him.”

Flores de tristeza and an Exorcist, the boy was truly detested by fate.

“I understand.” Oh, he did. That parasite leeching on the boy’s lifespan kept him alive, healed him over and over again so he could keep fulfilling its cursed mission. Tyki wondered what his lungs looked like, whether they were entirely scarred over. “Thank you still, menino.”

Aquilegia atrata

Lenalee was excellent at reading people, even if she couldn’t keep up with Lavi. It was a skill she had learned out of necessity during all her attempts at escaping the Order, searching for weaknesses in her guards, moments where their attention slipped just enough for her to throw herself out of the high towers they kept her in.

No matter how much Allen lied and cheated and smiled, Lenalee could see that it wasn’t true.

And that he was putting too much pressure on himself.

Surrounded by all the Akuma, hunting down Allen’s Master, the fall was inevitable.

Lenalee just hoped she would be there to catch him when it was the time as Komui had been there for her.

Dianthus caryophyllus

Innocence was good and holy.

God’s dearly beloved crystal, sent to save humanity.

Allen had known this deep in his heart, had clung to it when the appearance of his arm had still made him insecure because it gave him purpose. He was not so foolish as to think himself special, one of God’s chosen, but he chose to believe that Innocence mattered.

That it was kind and protected.

“I’m sorry,” Suman Dark apologized under tears he could not cry as Allen kept on screaming, begging him to live and go on, no matter how much the Innocence was eating away at him.

This couldn’t be true; it shouldn’t happen. His own Innocence would never do this to him, had it loved and protected him even against his own father. Yet it was failing him when Allen tried to dig through the violet butterflies, the violent pain. His shoulders trembled terribly as he swallowed down the sharp taste of carnations burning him as much as the artificial insects left nothing of Suman behind.

Cercis siliquastrum

“Fraude A?” Tyki exclaimed, surprised, though he knew he shouldn’t be. He had known that the tristeza boy had been an Exorcist, these plagues liked to flaunt it after all, with their shiny expensive uniforms, and he’d known that they’d eventually clash on the battlefield.

He had just, foolishly perhaps, hoped that it would be a fair battle, one where the boy could give it his all despite his failing, scarred lungs.

Allen Walker.

How pitiful that his name was on Tyki’s list.

“Don’t worry,” Tyki told him. “It doesn’t hurt.”

His words weren’t even a lie, and Tyki knew he could very easily put the boy to rest without him feeling a thing, and yet, he couldn’t help explain his work, act it out, because he wanted to leave his mark on his victim, have Allen Walker grieve flowers for him.

So Tyki crushed his hand, his Innocence, destroyed it with Dark Matter, let the Tease bite into his heart, and left the boy in tears.

Taking his dying breaths, unable to spit any flowers for Tyki. With a grin, he reached deep into the boy’s lung, retrieving judas tree blooms and a silver button.

How sad.

Tyki had hoped for poppies.

Bellis perennis

Allen lay on the ground, his Innocence above him as mist as he struggled for breath. It had never been this bad before. He couldn’t remember a single time where his flowers had been coated in so much blood, he couldn’t tell which kind it was right from the bat.

“You can’t overdo it,” Fo told him, rolling back on her feet almost playfully if not for the severity of the situation. “Your Innocence isn’t healing you anymore.”

I know, Allen wanted to reply. I know, I know, and it is all my fault.

He only wanted to continue on, do as he always had, push through the pain, and fulfill his purpose. Why was it so difficult, why did he struggle so much? Did his Innocence think him a betrayer, nothing worth saving anymore?

Please, he begged into the quiet, his flowers for the first time since he’d started blooming posing a  threat to him. I just want to do my duty.

He grabbed his bloodied flowers with his one good hand and thought about springtime and Mana teaching him how to make daisy chains.

Tagetes lucida

Marigolds were comforting, almost. Allen could feel his throat put itself back together, healing as his body still decided to punish him. He wondered whether the other parasitic Exorcists had felt like this as well, torn between being weapon and host, beloved friend and tool.

He wondered what it might have been like for Maria to be the host of Innocence and spit flowers whenever she needed her throat to sing.

He wondered what her Innocence’s name had been once upon a time before it had become nothing more than Grave of Maria.

(Wondered whether his Master loved him enough to turn him into a doll to be used for battle as Allen would want.

Whether Cross Marian loved him too much to do so.)

“Tell me where my friends are,” Allen ordered and the Akuma complied, truth tasting like marigolds and poppies.

Rosa bracteata: Macartney rose – white rose, typically given to fathers

Flower list

Ornithogalum umbellatum: Star of Bethlehem – atonement for crime, reconciliation, guilt and fear

Calendula officinalis: marigold – pain and grief

Tagetes erecta: marigold

Mentha arvensis: mint – suspicion, lack of trust

Lathyrus odoratus: sweet pea – goodbye, departure

Gypsophila paniculate: baby’s breath – innocence, pure at heart

Papaver nudicaule: poppies

Roseanne giganteus carnivorus: Rosanne from canon

Glaucium flavum: poppies

Aquilegia atrata: purple columbine – driven to win

Dianthus caryophyllus: yellow carnation – disdain, disappointment, rejection

Cercis siliquastrum: judas tree – betrayal, unbelief

Bellis perennis: daisy – innocence, purity, new beginnings

Tagetes lucida: marigold

#dgm #allen walker #tyki mikk #lavi #cross marian #d gray man #fanfic

[luminous-shifting-vibes]

*sequel* to actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server

once again, it's out of context because x1000 funnier

also x1000 longer than previous post

"ur satan is gnc af"

"Bestie I’m already having gender envy over a fucking demon please"

"O_O ODEPIJHFbavevisdpvfhzdcnjawedsidjksjdkoeirjfmkdsoeirujdksodifjndmksoidfjdksidfj ITS" NOT IN MY FRAFTS IS SPEDNT 1 hour PN THAT SHIT"

"AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"ohoho sexy"

"I am very proud of myself"

"himbo x edgy fuck"

"YOU COULD SQUISH HES CHEECKS"

"he has teefs"

"SQUASH"

"good for biting 📷"

"he's a himbo basically"

"B͂̒̄iͫ̍̈tͧ̓ͯè̄̇"

"bifth"

"i havent watched blue exorcist in years but mr okumura my beloved </3"

"MY LIFE QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED"

"is it important information to mention that the person i put up for my turn is the son of satan" "I know like 1 thing about everyone who isnt ranboo lmfao"

"crimes"

"tumblr sexyman"

"idk why but my first thought was cowboy onceler"

"I vibe with him but he is very long and twisty"

"steampunk e-girl"

"steampunk tumblr sexyman"

"Canonically bi crimelord I agree!!"

"OOO FRIEND SHAPED"

"ARTIST SIGHTED"

"they look like someone i would want to be friends with but is way cooler than me so i'd never actually talk to them"

"babby..... would die for him"

"honestly i probably kin him"

"i'm sure he's lovely but he looks way too much like my ex i'm sorry-"

"i'd be down for another rotation! i have another twink to show y'all"

"Also :00 blonde friend"

"Let us all infodhmo"

"Hsjagdvbs shhh im on phone"

"Nix woukd you like to joon?

"skitters away"

"I have two braincells and they both drink dumb bitch juice"

"oof wait whats the order again i have 0 memory"

"i want to bond with him over cosplay-"

"Awkwardly watches in band kid"

"One day I'm gonna a broadway star"

"which isnt to say they were bad. they were just fortnite dancing during rehersals"

"I threw it so hard my glasses flew off and slid under the stage right divider"

"anyway heres my boi"

"emo"

"haha emo"

"virgil sanders kinnie"

"he looks like he listens to my chemical panic at the fallout boy"

"Bro I bet he'd kick my ass with his deck"

"bird man my beloved"

"fuck i had so much to say and then i forgot it all"

"Birds!!"

"guiguhuh"

"crabrave"

"She sounds like someone I would end up stealing her personality"

"yess name collector gang"

"alias glass aiden haven absinthe fish brick rice"

"But I have Cypress, Remure, Genesis, Lemres, and Comet"

"And she's named after a mars candy bar bc alien"

"Hey, if plato went by plato, you can be king thief"

"im not dissing my gramma like that shfojd"

"My dad has seven legal names" "bitches be like *looks at fictional character* *steals their name* it's us we're bithces"

"coraline lowkey traumatized me but i adore it regardless"

"mmmmmm magic man :]"

"°0° green man"

"criminal (affectionate)"

"he would shoplift a candy bar from walmart and then brag to all of his friends about the sick stealing he did"

"despite the fact he's canonically been capable of overpowering a minor deity"

"i would commit so many crimes for him"

"Very babey"

"Yes please tell green man he is very pog"

"he also keeps a lot of dumb secrets"

"but I will sorely miss the chaos and energy of this here chat until I wake again" (by request XD)

"i just say words and if they're funny then they're funny"

"* or extremly chaotic either works"

"at this point we are just taking turns rambling"

"oH--"

"bc my brain has a schedule"

"Hopefully they have gyoza there or I will lose my mind"

"hehe yes spooky man"

"my ghost glucose guardian"

"the head of the undead group that lives there, and we end up dating. (yes I date a ghost, no I will not be taking constructive criticism /lh)"

"ghosts r just inherently sexy"

"i mean im becoming a squid thing so"

"Raven quirk raven quirk!!"

"ł â m p"

"łæmp"

"mothman: ooh lamp you look very nice today! do you come here often? mothman: wait shit no"

"I'd date a ghost"

"mine is still accurate, i am still sobbing (/j)"

"p e e p e e"

""@nick wilde is a tumblr sexyman" is the best thing i have ever seen"

"im sorry im cackling like a dying hyena"

"you're all 12 year olds"

"PEENIE"

"He once caused global warming on accident so he could get a tan"

"god, what a himbo. i love him"

"that reminds me of my friends kin assigned me jesus"

"Man outside of battle be like: princely crying but then in battle hes like: "CATACLYSM! DISASTER! DEVASTATION!" Chill out man"

"Every time I talk about satan it never fails to shock people it's my favorite thing to do"

"im kin assigning him roman sanders" ""Oh yeah he caused global warming because he wanted to get girls" "he what""

"oh damn i forgot satan was straight"

"twink appreciation club"

"give us the twinks"

"my first thought was bottom-"

"so many people to try and get his dad to love him"

"daddy issued"

"OH MY GOD ITS WILBUR"

"Big boy but"

"anyways janus is swagggg"

"........................."

"gib twink"

"give twink then i will share"

"holds him gentle like hamburger"

"This dumb bitch opened a book that said "do not open" and got possessed by a little bastard"

"he is. fragile creachur"

"klug is beauty klug is grace i would let him step on my face"

"If I'm playing swap and I have to hear one more "Pwanet Powew" Im gonna lose it"

"Who is to blame? Pandora or the box?"

"Bakugo isnt my type but I respect the drip"

"i say like my type isnt long-haired pretty boys and girls that look so gnc that people have a history of confusing them for men"

"hes a gremlin and i can appreciate a pretty gremlin"

"that is to say i am attracted to VFlower vocaloid. This is a confession."

"note i am a lesbian"

"You may like Schezo wegey"

"why does he have one single expression"

"soul soul eater passes the vibe check"

"magic wand"

"I Want To Hold His Hand"

"i would commit a war crime for him any war crime idc which one"

"my favorite one is when he sounded rlly gay because he said "Muscular bodies keep me satisfied""

"p e a n u t"

"Klug is a homophobic homosexual its just facts"

"grug from the croods is peak male performance"

"jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely."

"tag yourself im the fireworks shooting from the top of the head"

"i like essays"

"central time gang"

"11:11 pog-" (wait... is that a suprise angel number?? yes it is lovelies just for you <3)

"Then again im also a dumbass bitch who wonders what the souls in soul eater taste like. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. THEY LOOK TASTY AS HELL!!!! LIKE GODDAMN BRO YOU'RE MAKING ME FUCKING HUNGRY. Like. that shit- it's Bone Apple motherfucking Teeth. hell yea my guy. Im hongy now.... shlorp I'm seriously considering this. Like. They seem kinda like a liquid? But a solid? Are they like jello? The fuck they taste like my guy???? I keep imagining they're like sour, like sour candy maybe? Or do they taste salty? Sweet? Maybe some combo of two? Do they even have a taste or is it about the texture? The sensation? God my mouth is watering what the hell. I am starving. I think I need to go get a cookie. I'm gonna go get a cookie. Brb. I'm better. I'm still craving souls though. Which is a weird-ass cringey thing to say but I'm being dead-ass rn. They just.... look tasty???? And I wanna eat one. Thus. I am shifting to Soul Eater for the express purpose of satisfying my fucking cravings. enjoy"

"points were made"

"jello? more like helloooo schloooAHFJDSDAIDWNALDHSJKDAIDANDM"

"WAIT I THINK I HAVE AN ANIME GIRL BITING VIDEO TOO"

"anime girl voice: mmm! mm... ahhhhmp!! mmm, mmm... aaahmp!"

"i think it sounds great i'm going to start eating like that"

"several people are typing"

"do these look edible to you"

"forbidden gummies"

"when I was on lsd I couldn't eat my fruit gummies because I thought they were alive because they had little faces on them"

"oh shit yeah don't do drugs"

"anyways general consensus is puyos are edible, ty for your input everyone"

"everypony is a word so powerful it can bring nations to its knees"

"pls the self control it's taking me not to say "hewwo everypony" in gen chat when someone new joins-"

"hewwo evewrypony uwu deaw cewestia i hopwe it doewsnt wain owo"

"ive cooked up a sowution wiwth the knowwege ive acwued. they say a kitcwen time saves niwne, but im just savwing two. Ive gathewwed the inwedients to make a time sowbet. Thewe's hawdly woom fow seconds when the seconds mewt away."

"I had a ten year old sister... you know what happened to her??? very sad, very tragic... she turned eleven....."

"NIIICE"

"Guts dont say the secks word :( /j"

"watch your fucking language in front of the president"

"im so sorry lumi"

"i think you're like ehhhh 8/10 funny"

"now me???? 10/10. Hilarious"

"sometimes i have to take a step back and remember that this is the same guts i follow on tumblr /lh"

""ok every here's some good shifting advice!!! uwu have a good day" "yeah i did lsd and ate fruit gummies""

"i have one setting and it's whatever this is"

"my bitch ass cat just pushed the door open with his fuzzy face and now my sleeping dad is being lulled into dreams by Cosmo Sheldrake's 'Pliocine'."

"me on discord: nick wilde"

"me on tumblr: shifting water! haha funne! me on here: my hermit crabs are cannibals also i want to eat souls."

"im sorry yOUR VIBESA RE JUST SO DIFFERNT"

"u give off older cousin ive never spoken to but always admire at the family gatherings vibes"

"what the fuck"

"BC I HAVE LIBERTU"

"If you adopt me then yes"

"am I qualified for dad jokes???"

"we're all a lot smarter on tumblr"

"I'm like "awww... sweet... sweet little shiftlings... posting such sweet shiftling content... so pure, so wholesome... does not even know abcs....""

"can't think before you speak if you never think B)"

"I'm not responsible enough to be a mom"

"cat pet"

"show us pictures of the cat or i will do Crime"

"maybe thats me being a coward tho"

"MOTH!!!! MOTH MY BELOVED"

if y'all want I can make this a series bc shiftblr keeps giving me more content

#tw drugs #tw swearing #tw cannibalism #tw crime #tw food #tw homophobia #shitpost #out of context #out of context quotes #lumi's quotes

[fantasyandromancelover]

Shrek AU

This is another story idea I’m giving up because again I can’t write this for certain writers. Please let me know if there any writers who would write this.

The story takes place on earth instead of hell and demons are naturally born that way they are instead of just being human sinners in a past life. Same applies to angels and imps.

Alastor is a natural born demon who as a boy lived peacefully with his mother. Neither one of them ever harmed anyone but because they’re demons society is either feared or disgusted by them. When he’s still a child an angry mob kills his mother and he’s forced to run away from his home. He wanders around for sometime, looking for a new home and receives kindness from no one which he cannot understand. Then one day when a little girl attempts to show him a little compassion and befriend him, she is pulled away by her father who then shoos him off. When he tries to return something she dropped he overhears her father telling the girl that demons will always be hated, be seen as monsters, and that they will never ever be loved.

This causes Alastor to become reclusive and grow up to behave exactly how the people see him. Mean, dangerous, blood thirsty, and terrifying. He settles into a forest which is rumored to be haunted and remains there alone for the rest of his childhood. As an adult he fits the entire stereotype of a demon to a T however some of his real self does stay with him such as being a good cook and having a love of literature and the arts. Despite being alone he seems content until he ends up accidentally saving Angel Dust a spider demon who won’t leave him alone much to his irritation which is furthered when a bunch of other demons, imps, and angels are exiled to his forest.

He learns from them that they were banished here my Vox a human and ambitious regent who harbors hatred for all non human beings. After begging and pleading they finally convince Alastor to somehow convince Vox to let them return to their homes and he reluctantly brings Angel along because he has no idea where Vox lives. Vox at the moment is seeking to expand his reign and gain control of the kingdom of King Lucifer and Queen Lilith but to that he would have to marry thir daughter and only child Princess Charlotte “Charlie” who years ago was locked away in a heavily secured tower and guarded by her appointed guardian the moth demon Vagatha “Vaggie.” Vox being a pathetic cowardly type decides to send someone to retrieve her.

When he hears about Alastor’s reputation he decides to send him to rescue Charlie in exchange for having the forest cleared up. Alastor and Angel Dust end up rescuing the seemingly human Princess Charlie but she’s applaud to find that her rescuer is a demon but she ends up going with them when he carries her off by force. When it gets late Charlie insists that they stop for camp and that she have a private area to sleep in. Though suspicious of why she makes these requests, they comply just to keep her from going off.

Alastor acts like Charlie’s treatment doesn’t bother him and says that he’s used to it but at night Angel Dust finally gets him to confess his past with humans and how they killed his mother, terrorized him throughout his childhood, and have always judged him before they even knew him. Charlie over hears this and she feels terrible about how she treated him. In the morning Charlie completely changed her attitude and starts to behave friendly like to the boys much to their confusion.

When they start their journey they encounter exorcists who attempt to kill Alastor and Angel Dust but Charlie having been trained in hand to hand combat manages to knock them all out which impresses Alastor and the two start to develop an attraction as she tries to remove a blessed blade from Alastor’s side. Later they both discover that they both suffered through sad childhoods and as they try to explain which one of them had the worst Alastor let’s it slip that only one person ever showed him kindness was that little girl who dropped something that he’s kept with him all these years. Charlie recognizes Alastor’s keepsake and reveals to him that she was that little girl which shocks all three of them. Continuing on to Vox’s kingdom, Alastor and Charlie discover that they have a lot more in common than they realize, sharing a passion for literature and the arts and soon they fall in love which doesn’t go unnoticed by Angel Dust.

At night when Charlie goes off somewhere to sleep alone, Angel attempts to get Alastor to confess how he feels to which he denies his feelings. So then Angel tries to get Charlie to confess but discovers that she has changed into a demon. She tearfully reveals to him that her father King Lucifer was once a demon but he took a potion that changed him into a human so he could marry her human mother Lilith. But the potion’s effects couldn’t change Lucifer’s demonic blood so Charlie was born half human half demon. By day she was human but by night she was a demon and she would remain that way until she finds true love’s first kiss. She also reveals that her father was so desperate to keep anyone from finding out that he was once a demon that he had her locked away in that tower as a child.

As they talk Alastor decides to tell Charlie he loves her but over hears their conversation. He hears Charlie refer to someone as “A hideous freak of nature that no one could ever love.” And assumes she’s talking about him, he’s hurt and storms off. Angel tries to convince her to tell Alastor the truth about herself and how she really feels but she refuses thinking that no one could ever accept her and has Angel swear the whole thing to secrecy. In the morning when Charlie is human again she changes her mind and tries to talk to Alastor but he refuses to speak to her due to his misunderstood feelings.

Vox arrives and proposes to Charlie. Though she does not like him she accepts due to her desperation to break the curse and requests that they marry before sunset. Alastor then leaves Angel but not before cruelly and unjustifiably telling him off and returns to his forest which has now been cleared out. Despite getting what they “Always wanted” both Alastor and Charlie are miserable and heartbroken. Angel having had enough of Alastor’s stubbornness angrily confronts him and manages to talk some sense into him by telling him that Charlie wasn’t referring to him as the unloveable freak of nature. The two make up and with help from Vaggie who Angel befriended (or romancized which ever direction the author wants to go with.) The three of them manage to jack a vehicle (Vaggie knocks out the driver) and go down to where the wedding is being held.

Alastor interrupts the wedding before Vox and Charlie can kiss and apologizes to her. He tries to confess but gets a little tongue tied however it’s obvious how he feels to everyone and Vox cruelly mocks Alastor for his feelings. Torn between true love and breaking the curse Charlie is stuck. When the sun sets she reveals her secret to Alastor and turns into a demon in front of everyone which causes a surprised Alastor to understand what he overheard. Outraged and disgusted by the both of them Vox orders Alastor to be killed and Charlie to be locked back in the tower. However he is killed by Vaggie and Angel but they don’t suffer any consequences because no one liked Vox to begin with. Alastor and Charlie profess their love and share a kiss, which lifts the curse curse. Charlie assumes “love’s true form” as the curse predicted and remains a demon permanently. No longer believing she is beautiful, Charlie is consoled by Alastor, who tells her she always has been. They get married in the forest surrounded by all the demons, imps, and angels and leave on their honeymoon.

#hazbinhotel #hazbin hotel #alastor radio demon #alastor #Alastor x Charlie #charlotte magne #charlie mange #hazbin hotel charlie #charlastor #radiobelle #alastor and charlie #Anthony #angel dust #vagatha #vaggie #angel dust x vaggie #spidermoth #hazbin hotel au #shrek #shrek au #angel dust and vaggie #fairy tales #fairy tale au #fairy tale #hazbin vaggie #hazbin angel dust

[distopea]

So since I have a demon AU for Ace... I'd add...

Naga! Enel: Half human and half snake, with a giant reptilian body and a long blue and golden tail. He devours humans, and plays games with them whenever they enter his Garden. He's an old guardian, and God of thunder.

Ex soldier and demon hunter Mads: A former marine commando who lost a leg during war. He's a man with PTSD, but his combat is far from being done. His little brother has been cursed by a fae, and Mads wishes to find him again and help him. He's often associated to the Church, using guns and shuriken for his exorcist work.

Half cursed soul Mika: He was human, but he made a pact with a devilish fae, offering half of his soul to follow the man he loves in Hell. Mika is slowly turning into a monster, scales, spikes and fangs growing over his body... He'd probably turn into an incubus if no one tries to save him.

Werewolf Jovan: He was born with a curse and he's hiding in society. Jovan knows his nature, but he has no pack, and no knowledge regarding his curse. He's wandering in the world, hunting demons whenever he can, and chaining himself to a rock for each full moon.

Dark priest Vex: a satanist priest who abjects God and worships chaos. He's a human enemy of the Demon Hunters, and would use his dark knowledge to conclude pacts with demons, faes and fallen angels, as long as humanity is suffering and he's having his fun.

#; OOC tag #; mobile tag #; wish list #; gimme me PLOTS

[keriwi1]

In this AU there are only 3 archangels  I picked due to them being the main three in Catholic Church. Those are all Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss OC’s  I made for my fanfic “Angels of Hell”. They are not main characters, but I decided that some people may want some extra information about them, and it was fun to design them.  

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30999707/chapters/76569236

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13874363/1/Angels-of-hell

Gabriella (Pigeon)

-Yes, she is a female

-She is in charge of Paradise which takes her most of the time.

-She basically owns and runs all media in Heaven

-She loves to broadcast in person just so she can be the bringer of good news.

-She also inspiries mortal writers and creators - she likes to give them a little push here and there. It doesn't have to be religious content, but that’s her favorite.

-She is in relationship with Michael

-She is extremely upbeat and sweet.

-Raphael's sister

-Her stuff is a mix between microphone and  Monstrance

Michael (Lion)

-Pretend that he do something, mostly just do nothing

-He definitely is a bit of a himbo

-He mostly lives on his past military cariere and fame

-He and Gabiel met for the first time in the war with fallen angels, she was broadcasting the events as a news reporter.

-He was in charge of an exorcist army that goes to Hell every year, but now he relegated the task to other angels.

-He kind of hopes he can start a new war with Hell just to have anything to do on retirement.

-He mostly only remembers Lucifer as this cute baby cherub, not sure why others look at him weird for bringing that one up

Raphael (Dog)

- Healer of the group

-He tooks everything he does way too seriously, and is mostly grumpy because of this.

-He has two jobs, one is to be in charge of guardian angel recruitment and other is to adjust new souls on the way to heaven.

-Strong believer in any form animal therapy (his favorite one begin dog therapy)

-Despite beginning the same age as the other two, Gaby and Michael like to call him Puppy which he hates.

-He just loves long walks. He refuses to admit that because he’s a dog.

-He can turn into a real dog and help mortals find their way on travel. He doesn't do it much nowadays since the population is getting bigger and he can send other guardian angels.

-He was and is a guardian angel of many famous doctors and travelers.

-Doesn't have to wear glasses, wears them to look more mature.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel oc #Archangels oc's #angels of hell #my fanfic stuff #my fanfiction #helluva boss #helluva boss oc's

[desarcalize]

Dusk 8: The awakening

(Flashback) Sarah Miller was daughter of poor family. They lived all together in a village some kilometers away from Fordwich. One night, there was an Akuma attack in the village. A lot of people died and some of them became monsters. Sarah was only seven years old. She ran away when the akuma just attacked the house. She went to Fordwich by foot and she thought that these where the last moments of her life.

She saw the church and approached it. She was afraid that Akuma would find her, so she slept like a fetus in the corner next to the door. It was a ready cold night and the clothes she wore wasn’t good enough to keep her warm. She tried to stay awake, so if she saw one of those monsters, to ran away, but her childness made her to fall asleep quickly.

The next day, mother Rebecca, who was forty-nine years old back then, came out of the monastery door. She was wearing her nun costume and she was ready to go out for shopping to the grocery, when she was a child sleeping next the door.

She approached it and pushed it to make her wake. The girl woke up scared and Rebecca tried to calm her down. She took her in her arms, but the girl was. Without knowing what to do, she took the girl in the monastery.

Sarah was invited to the lunch table of the monastery. There were two more girls. The one was sixteen years old and introduced herself as Sofia Miles. The other girl, was only one year older than Sarah and introduced herself as Maria Canpus.

Maria was a girl of a somehow rich family. She was a spoiled girl, full of energy and happiness, and her parents had enough of her. So, they closed her to the monastery, so she would become a kind and polite girl.  She was the opposite of Sarah, she always was.

Rebecca was a simple nun, she had nothing to do with the exorcists. Until then, at least. After she learned about the Akuma attack, she searched in every book in warehouse of the monastery. She found some old pages of exorcism and used them to fight the monsters.

That time she was in the warehouse, she left Maria, Sarah and Sofia in the white room. The girls spent much time together, listening to Sofia’s beautiful melody. They quickly became friends.

When the Akuma attached for first time in the Fordwich, Sofia and Rebecca tried to fight them, as classic exorcists, but that wasn’t enough. In that fight, Sofia lost her life in Rebecca’s hands. From that time and later, Rebecca promised to herself that she will find a true exorcist, a guardian for the two little girls.

Growing together, anyone would notice that Maria was careless and immature, but Sarah, who seemed younger than her age, was always more careful. Maria’s carelessness made her to look like she wasn’t a nun, but just a simple believer of the God.

When Maria was sixteen, Cross Maria was just arrived to the little city. He introduced himself as a new priest, who was sent by the Catholic Academy to practice his skills in a church of a small village. Rebecca gave her position and her room to the new priest. Her exorcist’s skills impressed Cross, who wanted to be an exorcist, but there were not many lessons in his Academy in that part. Rebecca trained him in everything he needed to know about fighting the devil, from the simple cross’s spell, to the power of innocent. Cross wanted to learn more about innocents, so he spent five months searching informations of where he can find them. His research drove him to a small group of exorcists in France, who called themselves “Black Order”.

These people gave to Cross the innocent he needed, but under one condition: He had to find students to whom he will transmit his knowledge. Cross chose Maria and Sarah,who accepted his offer, because they wanted to be exorcists like Rebecca.

Two months later, Maria and Cross started to have strong feelings for each other, but they were both ashamed to confess. One night, when Cross was drinking, Maria asked him if she can accompany him. Cross blushed and accepted her request, so they spent almost every night, drinking, telling stories and jokes.

Sarah had enough with them, she wasn’t jealous, but she wanted to keep the monastery’s good name in this small city. She was always scolded them, they always seemed regretted, but Rebecca was laughing, because she knew that these young couple, would do it again the next night.

Some days later, a man arrived to the church, requesting to talk with the man priest of the monastery. Cross approached him and the man told him that he found an eleven years old boy, who lost his parents and if church couldn’t do anything, then they should give his to an orphanage. Rebecca asked from Cross to keep this boy as worker and Cross agreed. This boy’s name was Barba and he learned how to be a housekeeper of the church really quickly. He helped Rebecca with the food and sometimes the young nuns with the cleaning.

(End of flashback) Nea was sitting in the main corridor with his back on the wall. He was holding his sword in his hands and his clothes were full of the Akuma’s blood. His brain was empty. It was like he was sleeping, but his eyes were open.

Someone approached him, but he didn’t make a move. The man who approached him, offered his hand to help him to stand up. Nea’s eyes started moving and looked the man who offered his hand. It was Allen.

The red-heard man smiled at him and Nea grabbed his hand. He stood up and looked the place around him. Everything was a mess, everything was full of blood, the corridor, the seats, his clothes. It was like Hell

“Father Cross told me what you did” Allen said “And I am impressed by you” Nea looked him surprised. He didn’t expected from him to tell him something like that “Aren’t you scared of me? Are you thinking that I am a sinner?” Allen shook his head “You are fighting for the shake of humanity, against the Evil. This is enough for me” “You don’t know my real goals” “It doesn’t matter. As long as you are the enemy of the Darkness, you are a friend of the Light” “Whatever you say…” “I want to support you in this war” “Where did this thing came from?” “Look, I spent my whole life in this village, reading the books of our religion. I want to do something more. I want to be useful to someone. Please, make me useful to you” “One day” Nea said and smiled “I will need you and your part will be really important” Allen looked him confused “What do you mean?” “I will tell you when the time will come. But for now, I have to go to wash my clothes. And someone has to clean this mess” Allen was watching Nea expressionless, as he was heading to the stairs. “This man seems so serious and so bad, but at the same time, he is so kind and childish. He is just… Weird” He didn’t have anything else to do, so he went to keep company to Father Cross.

Cross was sitting on his bed. His right side of his face was full of gauzes. He was looking to the floor, with empty thoughts. He lost Maria and Sarah was unconscious for two days in her room. That was enough for him to change dramatical.

Mother and Barba never saw him like this before, he didn’t talk much, he wasn’t getting out of his room, even for a bite of food. The only thing he was doing was smoking and drinking all the day.

Allen noticed Cross’s different personality from the first glance. He tried to help him, to make him feel better, but the only thing he got from him was swears. Without knowing what to do, he was called by Barba to help him out with the lunch.

Mana was at the wooden seats of the church, he thought that he could get away from the church’s responsibilities, but Barba, grabbed him from his clothes and drove him to the kitchen. Maybe Barba was only 12 years old now, but his body type, made him looking like to be in the age with Sarah. That made Mana to obey easily to his quests. Barba gave to him a piece of cloth and a silver bucket.

“Go and fill them with water and go to clean the main corridor” “Alright, alright. I can’t believe that I am taking orders from a boy, which is five years younger than me” “You know that I can here you, right?” “Em… I am going to fill this bucket with the water of the pit” he said and ran away fast

Mother was in Sarah’s room, treating her wounds. The Akuma scratches on her back, started from the right shoulder and ended at her left side. That’s why, Mother, as the only woman left to the monastery, had to treat her. She put away Sarah’s upper nun clothes and wrapped her naked body with gauzes.

In the room behind the church, Nea was checking the piano’s keys. He found some old music books in the monastery’s warehouse and started to playing the notes of pentagram. The sweet melody filled the church and the members felt like this music was a temporary salvation to their heavy souls.

Cross felt like a strange power was calling him. He couldn’t explain it, he just wanted to follow it and see what was on the other side. He stood up and left went on the underground of the monastery, trying to not be noticed by the other members.

He was standing in-front of the door of the room where the three exorcists were practicing their innocents. He inhaled and opened the door. He turned and looked the flower-like innocent of Sarah. He took it in his hands, without feeling anything. He knew that the innocent wanted his master and a master needed his innocent, so he took it and went to Sarah’s room.

Sarah was in a muzzling position, because of the scratches on her back. She was still unconscious and doesn’t seem to respond when he opened her room’s door. He approached her and put her innocent on her left hand. Even if she was in comma, the contact would activate the innocent. He looked at her one more time, how peaceful her young face was, before leaving the room and closing the door behind him.  

  At the afternoon, Allen and Mana brought the coffin and a black dress for Maria, just like Mother and Cross were ordered them. Mother dressed Maria and the two young men put her corpse in the coffin. They were ready to close it, but Cross stopped them.

“Please… Could you… Could you leave her some more days in her room” “But, Father Cross…” Allen said “I can’t let her go yet. Please, just for one more day. Tomorrow evening you can close it and take it” “As you wish” Allen said and made a movement with his head to Mana, to follow him outside of Maria’s room.

The approached the new coffin, opened it and looked inside. It doesn’t seem different than a normal coffin, but there was something strange about it. He could feel it, like it was an extent of his body, just like he was feeling the Judgment.   

He opened the door and climbed the stairs. He saw Nea, who just stopped his piano lessons. Cross did a movement with his head to follow him and that was what the young man did. There were in Cross’s room and Cross opened one drawer from the nightstand. There were five books inside there and he gave to Nea the two of them

“What’s up with that books?” “Search about the innocence types” “But, there are only two” Nea said and Cross turned to him. The expression on his face was full of interesting for the young Noah “Which are they? What do you know about them?” “It’s really weird that an exorcist like you doesn’t know….” “I asked you: Which are they?” “Ok, ok! Don’t shout! Well, they are the equipment type and parasitic type” “What do you know about them? Tell me everything”

 In the same time, in Sarah bedroom, the innocence got synchronized with her body. It turned from a white flower, to a blue cube. The blue cube turned to a liquid form, which got absorbed by her body, between her gauzes, inside her scratches.

Sarah started to moan from pain in her sleep, like she was watching a nightmare. She started to move and grabbed the pillow to withstand the pain. Bones came out of her back. She opened her eyes wide and her mouth, trying to scream from help, but she couldn’t, the voice didn’t come out.

  Back to Cross’s room, Nea and Cross was sitting on his bed having the books on their hands “I don’t know much” Nea said “I am not an exorcist, the one is an innocence which takes the form of an object and the other is taking the form of a body part” “So, you don’t know” “I am not lying to you, Cross Marian. Why should I? I told you that I know some things. These are everything I needed to know as a former Noah” “The innocence can kill Noah, too?” “Yes, of course! Akuma was created by the first Noah, Millennium Earl, or Adam. Noah and Akuma have not much differences in that part” “I see…” Cross said Mana was exhausted from the many works that Barba gave to him. “Now that Sarah was in comma and Maria was dead, there weren’t many people to take care of the monastery” He thought. He inhaled and he took of the red ribbon. His long brown hair felt on his back. He scratched the top of his head, to relax the roots of his hair from the so many hours in a ponytail. He was ready to lay on his bed, when he heard something like a drowned squeak. He turned and saw Nea’s sword, Crown Cross on his brother’s bed. He grabbed it and ran two to Sarah’s room.

He opened the door and he saw Sarah standing in front of her mirror with her arms covering her bare chest. Her long black hair was falling on her back, which now had two angel-like wings. The wings’ color was blue at the beginning of her back, turned into turquoise and they ended as green.

She turned and looked at him shocked by the awakening that happened to her and by the onslaught of man in her room. She covered her chest more and turned on the other side blushing. The same blushing was on Mana’s face “I am fine” she said “The bones of the wings came out of my back, I… I couldn’t yell at first, but… when my voice came back, I started screaming…. I am fine now…. You can go” “Yes… you are right” Mana said “I apologize” He left the room quickly, closing the door behind him. Sarah turned and looked the closing door, blushing.

  At night, Cross Marian was sitting on his bedroom, reading an old book he took from the warehouse. After the event with the two Akuma attacks and Nea’s story, he searched old books from the order, about Noah family and Adam. He found the legend of the Sculls. People who were wearing masks made of bones, who could use spells and manipulate the dead for the sake of Millennium Earl. The only thing they had to do was to say six words. 

An idea crossed his mind, like someone whispered something in his ear, reminding him something he forgot. He ran quickly to the stairs and went to the underground. He opened the Maria’s door and approached her coffin. He removed the chains and opened it and he was surprised that her body was like it was the first hours she died. Nothing changed, not even her smell. Maybe it sounds weird, but Cross loved everything on Maria, even her smell, which reminded him roses. He stepped back and whispered some words he read in this old book:

“On, Avata, Ura, Masarakat, On-gatar. Rise… Grave of Maria” Maria’s body started to move like she was alive. She stood up and got out of her coffin. Cross looked at it scared and full of awe. She turned and looked at him. She started to walk and approaching him. He reached out his hand and Maria grabbed it. He brought her close to him and looked in her expressionless face “I will never let you go. We are going to end this war. Together”

#dgm #d gray man #desarcalize #Cross Marian #nea walker #neah d campbell #nea d campbell #neah #nea #mana walker #mana d campbell #mana #Sarah Miller #my OC #My Story #katsura hoshino

[sapphirestarxx]

Through the Night chapter 2

 Chapter 2 also posted on my AO3

Tag Wall:

@lavendertwilight89 @hnnwnchstr @cstormsinukagblog @ravisk @superpixie42

let me know if you want to be added to my tag wall!

Sango stood there, feeling exhausted and trying to process everything.

"Kagome, what is going on?" 

Kagome took a deep breath. "Inuyasha isn't actually my boyfriend. He's a half demon tasked with protecting me," she revealed. "I introduced him as my boyfriend because his existence is supposed to be known only to those at the Higurashi Shrine. He's the guardian of the forest surrounding the shrine and has been for generations."

"Miroku knows him." Sango pointed out, frowning. "And protecting you from what?"

"As a monk I’ve had dealings with the Higurashi Shrine before. Also my meeting him wasn't exactly…approved." Miroku supplied.

"Protecting you from what?" Sango repeated. "Also you're a priestess, isn't having a half demon looking after you kind of ironic?"

"It's kind of a nightmare is what it is." Inuyasha snarked, and Kagome shot him a glare.

"Honestly, while watching you two try to act like a loving couple was entertaining, I don't see why you didn't tell Sango the truth sooner." Miroku said. "If I had known she was a demon slayer I would have insisted upon it." 

Sango felt strangely validated by his words. 

Kagome gave a sheepish smile. She directed her words to Sango. "Yeah, I know it sounds a little strange. But my family has had an understanding with him stretching back a few centuries." Sango looked at her expectantly when she paused and she continued. "As for what he's protecting me from, that actually has something to do with the rune you mentioned finding in that abandoned house."

"What do you know about it?" Sango asked. 

"It started a little over a month ago. Priests and priestesses have been getting attacked and left in comas with no hope of waking up, their vitality and spiritual powers drained. A few exorcists, too. Whoever or whatever is doing this is targeting those with great spiritual power and at every single attack there was a strange symbol left behind." Kagome explained.

"If it's a match for the ones ya say you've seen on your demon hunts, and I would bet it is, then they're all connected somehow." Inuyasha added. "The elders think Kagome could be a potential target so they've got me playin' babysitter."

Sango's heart froze in fear at the thought of that happening to Kagome. "Miroku's right, Kagome. Why didn't you tell me? I could have tried to help!" She couldn't keep the hurt from her voice.

"I wanted to tell you!" Kagome exclaimed with genuine regret. "I didn't know you had also been encountering these runes at your demon exterminations. It was thought to be a problem spiritual in nature and they wanted to keep it secret."

"Well that cat is out of the bag now." Inuyasha remarked. Kagome closed her eyes as if she was asking for patience.

"Now that I know what's going on you're not getting rid of me." Sango said.

"Wouldn't dream of it." Miroku replied. She rolled her eyes. ‘I wasn’t talking to you.’ she didn’t say.

"Can you show me the rune? I want to go inside and take a look." Kagome asked. Inuyasha started to protest and she cut him off. "They fought and exorcised the evil spirit, okay? It's safe now! Besides between the four of us I'd feel sorry for anything that tried to attack us. It wouldn't stand a chance."

"Fine. But if anything happens I'm carrying you out at the first sign of trouble." Inuyasha said in a tone that brooked no argument.

As a group they all entered the ruin, Sango and Miroku leading the way. Kagome stumbled and Inuyasha caught her, arm around her waist. 

"Be careful, would ya?" 

She mumbled an apology and he held onto her a moment longer before releasing her and she held her breath at the touch. He drove her crazy but she couldn’t help her attraction to him, which was beyond annoying.

“Here.” Sango said and Kagome walked up to the wall to look at the rune in interest.

“Is this your first time seeing one of these marks in person?” Sango asked in curiosity.

“I was never allowed to investigate one of the scenes before.” Kagome answered in a distracted voice. Tucking a strand of black hair behind her ear, she reached a hand up to touch the rune and closed her eyes in concentration. There was a feeling of malice coming from within it, and she reached deeper with her senses. Black magic, something tainted and twisted but also strangely familiar. She tried to follow it further, and let it lead her back to the source of this mystery. It was cloying and oily and seemed to coat the back of her throat to where it became difficult to breathe.

“Kagome!”

She gasped and came back to her senses, breathing heavily.

“Are you ok?” Sango asked in concern, hand on her shoulder.

“Yeah. Yeah I’m fine.” Kagome took a steadying breath then turned to face them. “I have its signature now. I’m confident I can now sense whenever a similar mark or the source is near.”

“You would be able to do that?” Miroku asked, impressed.

"Absolutely.”

They exited the building and Kagome turned to Sango and Miroku. “You guys should exchange numbers so we can communicate more effectively.” 

Sango didn’t miss the sly smirk that Kagome threw her way as she said it. Though Sango was loath to admit it, Kagome was right. It would definitely be more practical.

“You’re right.” She agreed reluctantly. Like it or not, Miroku was now a part of this. Or maybe he had been a part of it all along. After all, it seemed like she was the last to know anything. He was also probably a potential target considering his own spiritual powers.

“Give me your phone.” She said to him, holding her hand out. Miroku couldn’t contain his grin as she input her number into his phone. “There.”

“So it seems I get to have your number after all.” He said, delighted.

“Don’t get too excited. This is strictly for business purposes only.”

“Still counts.”

She rolled her eyes again. He was impossible.

“Well as fun as this has been, I think it's time to go home now.” Kagome said, her smile tired.

“Agreed.” Sango said as they began to make their way back to the main road. When they reached it Kagome and Inuyasha went their separate ways. Then it was just Sango and Miroku.

“Mind if I walk you home?” Miroku asked.

Sango had to hold back a cutting reply. She supposed she was still annoyed from earlier in the evening. “There’s no need. As I said before, I can take care of myself.”

“I’m well aware. Still, it would make me feel better.” He replied.

Sango thought it over for a moment. It seemed they were going the same way anyways so she figured why the hell not. “Okay sure, fine. Since we’re going in the same direction anyways.”

They walked in silence for a bit. He looked more exhausted than she did and she supposed that made sense. He had not only engaged the spirit physically but spiritually too. There was a grudging respect and admiration growing in her for his skill, if nothing else. And still he had offered to walk her home. That definitely counted for something in her book, though she wasn't going to be the first to admit it.

Miroku walked beside her in silence not knowing what to say. He was definitely interested in her, and that interest had only increased after she had revealed herself to be a demon slayer and proved to be more than capable in the haunted ruin. There were so many layers to her and he wanted to unwrap every one. 

She was obviously attracted to him too, that much had been apparent on her face at her first sight of him. And oh what a gorgeous face it was. Still, he had clearly stepped in it by flirting with that waitress. He hadn't meant anything by it, had said the words almost without thinking. More importantly, Inuyasha hadn’t given him the impression this was supposed to be a kind of date like Kagome clearly had to Sango. If he had known that he would have reigned in his behavior. Now she had a less than favorable view of him and he supposed he couldn’t blame her for that. He was definitely going to make the most of this opportunity of working together to change her mind, though.

“So how did you meet Inuyasha, then?” Sango asked, breaking the silence. Miroku looked at her in mild surprise that she was initiating a conversation with him. He suppressed a smile. 

“I was sixteen and visiting the Higurashi Shrine with my Uncle Mushin. He was there on business and I got bored and decided to explore the grounds a bit. I went into the forest and that’s when I met him. He was stubborn at first but we eventually became friends.”

“How long did that take? He doesn’t strike me as the friendly type.”

“It took a bit for him to come around.” He admitted. “I visited when I could get away from my other responsibilities and gradually he got used to my presence, and after a while I started inviting him to join me on some of my more difficult jobs. I know he comes across as kind of an ass but he’s got a good heart. It just takes a while for him to show it."

“I’m kind of impressed you waited for him to come around. It must have taken a while.” Sango said.

“I’m a patient man.” He replied looking at her meaningfully. He could tell she definitely caught his meaning by the way she tensed slightly and quickly looked away, a slight blush on her cheeks.

“You were sixteen when you met Inuyasha…how old are you now?” She asked hastily to steer the topic to something safer. He didn’t hold back his smile this time.

“Twenty six.” He answered. “And you?”

“Twenty four.”

“So how did you and Kagome meet?” He asked, half curious and half to keep the conversation going.

“She helped save my father’s life when I was fourteen and still training to be a demon slayer. There was an...accident so we brought him to the Higurashi Shrine.” Something in her voice made him look at her more closely but she didn’t elaborate so he didn’t press her.

They continued like that for the rest of the walk, sharing bits and pieces of themselves but nothing too personal. When they reached the outside of her apartment complex, she stopped.

“Well this is me.” She paused. “Oh yeah, you probably want your jacket back. Thanks for letting me borrow it.” She said and began to take it off.

“Keep it.” Miroku said, struck with a sudden urge. He realized he liked seeing her in something of his. She stood there, covered in streaks of dirt, her hair messed up from their tussle with the evil spirit, in his jacket and he thought he had never seen anything more beautiful.

Sango looked at him and he noticed how her pink lips parted in surprise. “Keep it?” She repeated.

“I insist. It looks better on you anyways.” He winked.

“Well...if you really don’t want it back.” She said, looking a little hesitant. “Thank you.”

“My pleasure.” He flashed her one last smile. “I’ll call you.” With that he gave a wave and headed out.

“Only for business!” he heard her call out from behind him and he laughed.

~☆~

Kagome walked beside Inuyasha. It was slightly awkward since they hadn’t spent a lot of one on one time together since they met over a month ago. Most of the time they were together they spent arguing. Not to her own fault that is... 

Inuyasha stopped and crouched down. Kagome looked at him curiously.

“Get on. It’ll be faster if I carry you. You’re too damn slow.” He said gruffly. Kagome looked at him in surprise. He had never offered anything like this before and she wondered why he was starting now. Still, she wasn’t about to pass his offer up.

“Uhm, ok. Thank you.” She said, slightly flustered. She climbed onto his back, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. He rose, gripping her thighs with his hands and Kagome suppressed a shiver of awareness at the touch. As they took off she rested her head against his back, thinking.

She had introduced Inuyasha as her boyfriend to Sango as a ruse but the truth was she wouldn’t mind being closer to the half demon. He drove her crazy with his attitude and how overprotective he was but she could also sense he had a good heart underneath all his bluster. He was determined to keep them at a distance, though. She wasn’t sure how to overcome his reluctance, all she knew was she wanted to. Her thoughts went to the day they first met, a month ago.

~☆~

She had heard of him, of course. As the Head Priestess of the Higurashi Shrine it was impossible not to. The knowledge of the agreement between her family and his was one of the many things passed down between the shrine heads. Their Shrine kept the forest in their name and didn’t allow for it to be sold off or built upon and in return, the inu-youkai offered the Higurashis their protection. 

A month ago when priestesses and priests were turning up in mysterious comas, Kagome's grandfather had pulled her from a lot of her duties and started keeping her inside their home more and more. It made her go mad with cabin fever and finally, a family meeting was called.

She came downstairs ready to fight for her independence and her life when all of a sudden she was face to face with the most attractive man she had ever laid eyes on. He had bright amber eyes, dark brows, tall lean but muscular build, long silver hair and fluffy doggy ears. He was a demon. And he was…scowling at her. He looked annoyed. What had her family done now?

“Uhm, hi, I’m Kagome,” she said with a polite bow. “Can I help you with anything? Are you here for someone?”

“Yea--you dumbass.”

“Excuse me?”

“God this is gonna fucking suck. You’re already slow. You definitely lack in regards to your reputation.”

“I’m sorry, do I know you?”

“Nope but unfortunately you will.”

“What is that supposed to mean??”

“Guess you’ll see, little girl.” 

“‘Little girl’? That’s so rude! I told you! My name is Kagome!”

“I’ll call ya by your name when you earn that kind of respect,” he snarked.

“Ugh!! Who are you and why are you showing me such--such--”

“Not much with words, are ya?”

“Mother?!” Kagome called as she was officially done dealing with this man.

“Oh, Kagome dear, we’re here in the dining room. Come on in, let us discuss the predicament.”

She watched the half demon stare her down as she entered the dining room fully and saw her grandfather, her mother, and a monk were sitting at the table. 

“Kagome, this is Miroku and I see you’ve already met Inuyasha.”

“Unfortunately.” Kagome muttered under her breath.

“I fucking heard that. And back at you.” Inuyasha called. Kagome clenched her fists and counted down from ten to calm herself. She was a priestess, she was grace, she was poise, and she would not give in to the temptation to purify his ass. Instead, she turned to the monk.

“Hi! It’s so nice to meet you, Miroku. I only wish it was under better circumstances.”

“Likewise. I see you are as lovely as they say.” He replied with a charming smile.

“Fucking flirt.” Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

She took her seat at the table and they began to discuss the current situation. She discovered a few exorcists had also been attacked which explained Miroku’s presence. When it was revealed that she was to be put in the “care” of Inuyasha she couldn’t stop herself from exclaiming, “What! Him?!”

“Hey I aint too excited about it either.” Inuyasha grumbled. 

Kagome just looked at her family in dismay. Her mother gave her a reassuring smile.

“This is for your protection, Kagome.” her grandfather was saying. “He is a powerful half demon and he will keep you from any harm that may befall you until we solve this mystery.”

‘For how long.’ she wanted to say but managed to hold her tongue. This was going to be a nightmare.

~☆~

She roused herself from her thoughts as she and Inuyasha approached the shrine.

“You awake back there?” He called.

“Yeah. Just thinking.”

“What about?”

“About the day we met.” She replied without thinking. Then the reality of what she had just said caught up with her and her cheeks burned. 'Great, now he knows I was thinking about him.'

“Keh. You’re not as much of a pain in my ass as I was expecting.” Inuyasha said, kneeling down at the door so she could get off of his back. Kagome did so almost reluctantly, now deprived of her excuse to hold onto him.

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” She said with a smile. To her surprise he gave her a half smile in return.

“Go to sleep. Ya need rest.”

As she walked inside the house she felt a warm glow in her chest. Maybe she was making progress with him after all.

~☆~

Sango exited the shower with a sigh, finally feeling clean. She had gone to another demon extermination that morning and while it had been an easy job it had also been messy. And normal, as much as demon infestations were normal. There had been no sign of the strange rune. She toweled herself off as she continued thinking.

Kagome had made it a point to try to ask the other priests and priestesses about it but most of the ones who could answer such questions were in comas themselves. It was a little disheartening. Her friend had taken it upon herself to start poring through the scrolls at the shrine’s archive and even making trips to the local library to try to figure out what it could possibly mean. 

It had been three days since she had heard from Miroku. She supposed he was off doing some investigating of his own in between his jobs. Or flirting with other girls. Not that she cared, she told herself.

There was nothing stopping her from calling him either, after all she had his number. He had texted her that same night with a “Hello, this is Miroku [heart emoji]” (cue the eyeroll) so she had been able to add it to her phone. She had no reason to, though. Like she had told him, it was strictly for business purposes only.

She wrapped the towel around herself and walked out of the bathroom. As she entered her bedroom she heard her phone ring and looked at it curiously. Miroku’s name was on the caller ID. 'Speak of the devil' she thought.

“Hello, Miroku? What is it?”

“Can’t I just call to hear your lovely voice?”

A pause.

“I’m hanging up now.”

“Wait! I have information!”

Before she could stop herself she gave a short laugh at the pitiful desperation in his voice. Somehow she knew without seeing his expression he was pleased with himself at that. Oh well.

“And now I’ve had the pleasure of hearing your laughter. Today is truly a delight.”

“Didn’t you say you had information?” Sango’s tone was dry.

“Indeed, I do. I met with my Uncle Mushin and I was able to sketch a replica of the symbol we came across. The ones that keep turning up and are agitating things in the supernatural world. My uncle...likes to hit the sake too hard sometimes so I had to wait for him to sober up a bit before I could get anything useful out of him. Turns out he’s come across this rune before in one of the books he keeps.”

“And?”

“And I was almost as interested in it as I am in you.”

“Can you stop turning everything into a line?”

“I’m sorry, it just comes naturally. Besides, what can I say? You inspire me.” He replied easily. She was suddenly glad she wasn’t speaking to him face to face because, against her own will, a small smile was playing across her lips.

“By the way, which apartment are you in again?”

The smile disappeared. Confusion and wariness had taken its place.

“...Why?”

“Did I forget to mention? I’m outside your apartment complex. Care to let me up?”

“And why would I do that?”

“So I can finish telling you about the information I discovered. Also, I got us lunch. It’s your favorite.”

“How do you know my favorite?”

“I may have asked Kagome.”

Of course. That traitor. Still, if it was her favorite, well...it would be a shame to let it go to waste. And she had skipped breakfast that morning so she was starving.

“Fine. Apartment 3A. Just let me put on some clothes first. You caught me right as I got out of the shower.”

He was quiet for a moment before he replied.

“I suppose greeting me naked is out of the question.”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

“I would.” He agreed. “But I’ll settle for fully clothed.”

Sango rolled her eyes and hung up. She finished drying off and quickly threw on a pair of leggings, a bra, and a t-shirt. Just as she had finished dragging a brush through her hair there was a knock at the door.

Miroku was standing there waiting with the food as promised. It smelled heavenly, and she closed her eyes for a moment in bliss, hand on the doorframe. When she opened them Miroku was looking at her in amusement. 

“Can I come in?”

“Right, of course. Sorry.” 

She stepped back to allow him to enter, closing the door behind him. She noticed the staff in his other hand for the first time as he passed her. A long shaft of smooth wood gave way to a loop of gold on top with golden rings that clinked together as he walked. A shakujo. He must have come from a job. And he had still stopped to get her food. Dammit. She didn’t want to like him but she was starting to.

He looked around as he walked in and she felt a little self conscious. Her apartment was modest but comfortable with a few feminine touches here and there but she hadn’t had time lately to clean. Oh well, if he didn’t like it he could leave.

“This is a nice place.” He commented, leaning his shakujo against the wall and setting the food down on the table. She murmured a thanks as she joined him on the couch while he passed the food out. Then noticed he had provided drinks as well, also her favorite -- peach tea. Damn, the man was thorough.

“So tell me about this rune.” She said as they ate.

“Can’t I enjoy a meal with a beautiful woman before getting down to business?”

“Information, please. As much as I appreciate the food, this isn’t a social call.”

“What if I want it to be?”

Sango just looked at him.

“Right, then. Can’t blame me for trying. So as I was saying I made the long trip out to my Uncle Mushin's temple a couple days ago. After examining my sketch he realized he had seen it before. It's from an obscure text that only has two printings in existence."

"Wow. It's that rare?"

"Yes. And that evil." His tone sobered a bit.

"What makes it so evil?"

"It's a tome of the blackest magic known. The temple Mushin works at keeps it sealed away in a restricted section behind the strongest barriers against evil."

"So whoever is doing this likely has the second copy." Sango mused aloud.

"Exactly. Many years ago every other copy was destroyed to keep it from falling into the wrong hands. The only exceptions were one being kept at Mushin's temple and another left to the Higurashi Shrine." Miroku explained.

Sango frowned in thought. "If one was left to the Higurashi Shrine then how come Kagome or the others haven't come across it? They've been searching for days. Or actually weeks, I suppose."

"It was probably stolen." Miroku replied.

"But how? If they're protected with such strong holy barriers nothing evil or demonic could get to it."

"Unless it wasn't a demon but a person. Someone who also has spiritual powers, which would allow them to bypass the wards."

Sango looked at him in interest. "You don't mean…?"

"Yes. A priestess or priest turned dark. That's my working theory anyways."

As she turned it over in her mind it made a sort of sense. They sat in silence for a few minutes pondering the ramifications of this information. Then something else occurred to her.

"Wait. You still haven't told me what the runes themselves mean."

"It's a combination of two runes that are part of a spell for amplification and absorption."

The absorption part made sense to her. All those holy people who had had their souls and powers sucked from them...what a terrible fate. It was the other part she couldn't figure out.

"Why amplification?"

"Likely to heighten the power that is derived from the pain, fear, blood, and chaos caused by all these attacks. With black magic it's possible to channel all that darkness into power."

"What could they be doing with all this power they're gathering?" Sango wondered. "I wish we knew what the purpose of all this was."

"I don't have an answer for that yet." Miroku shrugged apologetically.

"But thanks to you we do have some answers. We know so much more than we did before." Sango gave him a genuine smile. "I admit, I'm impressed."

Miroku looked pleased at her admission but said nothing.

"What did Kagome and Inuyasha have to say about it all?" She asked.

"I haven't told them yet. They were my next stop."

Sango couldn't contain her surprise. "You told me first?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Why not?" 

She fell silent. He had a point. What did it matter who was told first? Maybe it was just because she had been the last to know anything that him coming to her first with this made her feel strangely flattered.

"Did you have an exorcism to perform this morning?" She asked rather than answering him.

"I did." If he was surprised at her change of topic he didn't show it.

"You spent the last couple days traveling to uncover this information, exorcised an evil spirit right after returning, and came all the way over here to tell me in person while stopping to get me food along the way."

"Got us food. I ate too." He corrected. "I hope you're going to tell me you're impressed with me again."

"I'm going to tell you that you should go home and get some rest. You've definitely earned it." She said, though she was impressed with him. "I'll call Kagome and tell her everything."

"I would appreciate that." He said gratefully, rising to his feet and grabbing his staff. "Thank you for the pleasure of your company. I should be going now."

"Yeah, yeah." Sango rolled her eyes, but she gave a small smile. "Besides, I should be thanking you. That pasta was amazing."

"If it made you happy it was worth it. I'll see you later." He said and then he was gone. 

Sango sat there for a few moments after he left. If she wasn't careful he was going to find his way around her walls and into her heart, and wouldn't that be a mess?

~☆~

Kagome took a moment to process everything after ending the phone call with Sango. There was a lot she was going to have to discuss with her family. Her grandfather had never mentioned the tome of black magic to her and she wondered why. Perhaps he was unaware of the exact contents of the spellbook, or perhaps he had simply forgotten. However before she sought out her family she needed to tell Inuyasha. 

Opening her window she leaned out and called his name. She knew he would hear her; he was always nearby. 

"Whaddya want?"

His body filled the space in front of her as he perched on the window sill, one hand gripping the top of the window frame. He was so close they were practically nose to nose and she hastily backed up.

"Gah! You scared me!” She exclaimed, hand over her rapidly beating heart. 

“Why? You’re the one that called me, remember?”

“I didn’t realize you were perching up on top of the roof of my bedroom!”

“Whatever; what did you need?”

“I just got off the phone with Sango. Miroku learned a lot about the runes from his visit with his Uncle Mushin." She said as if he hadn't just been close enough for her to kiss him.

"Yeah and?"

Instead of answering she just looked at him for a moment. In the time they had known each other he never entered her bedroom, like there was some kind of invisible barrier he refused to cross. It perplexed her. What was the big deal?

"Aren't you going to come inside?"

"What, you mean into your room?? The hell would I do that for?"

"So we can talk like two civilized people."

"Well I'm fine right here." 

"Would you just get inside?! God!" Kagome exclaimed, losing patience. 

Inuyasha scowled at her. She scowled back. Then sighed.

"Please. Just come in. It's chilly today and I don't want to keep the window open."

Kagome didn't think that would sway him but apparently something in her face or voice must have convinced him. He climbed in slowly then shut the window behind him.

"Do you just go inviting every guy you meet into your room?" He added as if he was jealous.

“Uhm, no? Why would you ask such a thing?” She questioned, crossing her arms in front of her chest and pinning him with a glare for such a pointed question. 

“Just wondering why you think it’s okay to invite a man into your bedroom where you sleep.”

"Why are you making this weird? This is the 21st century! It's not a big deal."

"Listen, you're a priestess. You shouldn't be letting strange half breeds into your bedroom."

"I'm not."

"The hell you're not. Hello?? What do ya call what you're doing right now?"

"You're not strange. I know you and I trust you."

For some reason that admission from her caused him to sputter a bit. He regained his bearings soon enough, though.

"Oh yeah? And what if I tried somethin' on ya, huh?"

"You wouldn't. Not unless I asked you to and even then you'd probably fight me about it." She said sincerely. Her faith in him was unwavering. She just simply knew he would never hurt her. Mentioning that she could probably fry him with her power if he did something she didn't like didn't seem necessary. "Besides you're supposed to protect me or did you forget? It would be silly not to trust you."

Inuyasha looked at her closely. "If you asked me to? What exactly is it you want me to do to ya?" He smirked.

"Nothing!" Kagome blushed, realizing too late what she had said. "Anyways don't you want to know what I found out?”

“Changing the subject are we?”

“L-look! We both know you have no interest in doing anything like that with me okay? Stop teasing me--just drop it!” She yelled, embarrassed by her slip up and his continual poking at the subject. “Anyway Miroku told Sango a lot of interesting things. That mark we keep seeing is part of a spell that’s found in a book of the blackest magic around and there were only two on record. He thinks the one at the Higurashi Shrine was stolen, possibly by a priest or priestess that turned dark. If they had spiritual powers that would explain how they could circumvent all the barriers against evil that a book like that would be guarded with.”

Mercifully Inuyasha did not mention it again and instead appeared to be thinking these new revelations over. “If the barriers protect against evil then how come this priestess or whatever was able to waltz the fuck in? They’re still evil.”

“The wards probably only protect against anything with a demonic aura. Most priests and priestesses that resort to black magic have dealings with demons and that residual aura would cling to the practitioner and be enough to make it impossible to enter. This person must not have done that until they got their hands on the book.” Kagome replied. 

She went on to explain the rest of the information Sango had gotten from Miroku. There was a lot they knew now that they didn’t know before. However there were still just as many unanswered questions now as answered ones. And the biggest mystery still remained as to what the person responsible for this ultimately hoped to attain. 

When she was done explaining everything Inuyasha didn’t say anything for a minute. Then--

“Well fuck.”

Kagome agreed with him wholeheartedly.

~☆~

Sango awoke with a start. After her heart rate slowed to a more reasonable rhythm she groaned and covered her face with a hand. Seriously? She was dreaming of him? It didn’t seem to matter that she continually told herself she wasn’t interested in him or that she had only known the man for a week. Apparently her brain had decided it was going to torture her by giving her dreams of him that she would never let herself act upon. Turning over she buried her face into her pillow and sighed.

She had seen him a couple more times since he had brought her lunch a few days ago. Both times had included more offerings of food followed by conversation and sharing of theories regarding the situation. While she had been hesitant to associate with him outside of the whole rune business something had made her agree. That small part of her, that weakness in her for him that had taken residence since she had first seen his face, was surely to blame. 

He was incredibly easy to talk to and she found herself opening up to him a little. After seeing the pictures placed around her apartment he had asked questions about her family and she had told him about the death of her mother, her stern but loving father, and the little brother she adored and doted upon. In return he shared parts of his own life with her. She learned he had been raised by his Uncle Mushin outside the city. His mother was out of the picture, and his father died when he was a child.

Surprisingly he had kept the one-liners to a minimum but they hadn’t completely vanished from his vocabulary. She still rolled her eyes at them but now they were starting to make her smile in spite of herself. It would be so easy to give in to the feelings he arose in her that she fought so hard against...but she refused. A man like him was probably not used to being turned down. Repeatedly. She was just a challenge to him. At least that’s what she told herself to feel better about keeping their relationship firmly professional. 

Professional. Yeah, right. She was pretty sure that line was already getting blurred. Her dream was further proof of that. Miroku just had a way of getting her to lower her defenses. It was dangerous.

Her phone started ringing and she sat up, registering for the first time what had awoken her in the first place. It had definitely not been that...rather detailed dream. She had been fully invested in that, much to the pleasure of her subconscious and dismay of her waking consciousness. Looking at the caller ID she saw it was Kagome. Sango had apparently slept through her first attempt to call.

“Hello?” She answered, voice still heavy with sleep.

“Sango! Wait, were you asleep?”

“Mmyeah. Why, what’s up?”

“You realize it’s six in the evening.”

“I’m sensing some judgement right now.” Sango yawned. “My demon extermination earlier was tiring. I took a nap. What is it?”

“I’m sorry but you’re going to have to get your armor back on. I sensed the signature of a rune nearby.”

Just like that Sango was fully alert, sleep and dreams forgotten. There was a battle to fight.

#Inuyasha #MirSan #InuKag #Miroku x Sango #MiroSan #SanMir #Inuyasha x Kagome #Through the Night