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mintymiknow · 4 years

Text

Equilibrium | Lee Minho

Summary: Equilibrium (n.) a state of rest or balance due to the equal action of opposing forces. || He liked the adrenaline rush speed gave him, and you liked taking things slow. Perhaps you both found a state of equilibrium in each other.

[Street Racer!Minho x Fem!Reader] [WC: approx. 6.3k words]

Genre: Romance, fluff

Warnings: There isn’t any street racing in this tbh it’s just mentioned for context lol sorry Idk anything about racing

A/N: I’m sorry everything I’m posting right now is Minho. I really don’t have much motivation to write much except for Minho stuff when I’m really inspired or something. But anyway, this is kind of messy since I’m busy with classes, but I hope you like it! I’m just not over the fact that Minho wasn’t a racer in the MV lol.

You hated speed.

Well, you didn’t exactly hate speed. You just didn’t like the recklessness such a motion brought about. You preferred to live your life slowly, enjoying the tranquil currents life brought to you. You thought everything took place in their own time, so there was no point in speeding or slowing things down.

Lee Minho, on the other hand, hated slowness. He lived for speed.

Well, if you were addicted to street racing, it wouldn’t really be that big of a surprise.

Except, you weren’t the biggest fan of street racing; it was dangerous, burdensome, and reckless. You didn’t want anything to do with it, even if your younger brother, Felix, was involved in it. Sure, it made him happy, so you let him do as he wanted, but it didn’t change the fact that you were 24/7 worrying over his well-being.

“I’ll make sure he’s always safe.” Bang Chan had once said when you met Felix’s racing crew; the older male was the “leader” of sorts.

He seemed decent, this Chan guy, so you hesitantly trusted him to keep your brother safe every time he hung out with them.

Then you met the others - Seo Changbin, Hwang Hyunjin, Han Jisung, Kim Seungmin, and Yang Jeongin. Those boys were fairly decent, though they had some episodes of being chaotic, boisterous and dramatic.

Felix pretty much disappointed your parents when he expressed his decision on not working for the family business because he wanted to race. In the end, they let them do as he pleased. You, on the other hand, wanted to work in the business. Your parents owned several chains of restaurants, so when you graduated, you were assigned to manage one of these.

And that was when you met Lee Minho.

You can still clearly recall your encounter with that mischievous and somewhat flirty individual; the memory replays in your mind, and you can’t even begin to comprehend why.

It was late at night when you were sitting by one of the tables in Levanter, one of the many restaurants your parents owned. You managed this particular one after you graduated college because it was your favorite.

You usually closed the place after open hours were over, so here you were, just about ready to go home when you heard the sound of car engines outside. Your brother knew exactly when the restaurant opened and closed, so why was he here at this hour?

And why was he with his crew?

Several cars were parked outside, and a few men got out while smiling and laughing with each other, You recognized most of them, having already met the bunch. Felix pushed the frosted glass doors open, giving you a wide smile, “Hey y/n!”

You raised an eyebrow, “Hey Lix. I was just about to go home…why are you guys here?”

Jisung - one of Felix’s closest friends - slung an arm around your brother’s shoulder before responding, “We finished a bunch of races and won, so Lix here said we should celebrate here.”

You looked at your brother with a “really now?” expression, but he just laughed it off and gave you a hug. “Please?” he pleaded cutely, clinging to your arm.

You loved your younger brother more than anyone, so obviously, you couldn’t say no to such a request. “Fine, but don’t get used to it.” you poked his nose, “Mom and Dad are going to kill me.”

“You’re the best, y/n!” Chan cheered from the back.

You gave the older male a smile in acknowledgement, “I knew you’d say that, Chan.”

You were thankful for the fact that you knew how to cook even if you just managed the restaurant. You prepared a simple meal - or snack, rather - for the racing boys waiting outside. You could hear them laughing and cracking jokes, though Changbin and Hyunjin laughed the loudest.

When you came out of the kitchen, another individual had entered the restaurant. His hair was as dark as the night, tints of brown adding color to it. He had sharp features, but the smile he was sending to the group of racers was very much warm and…cute.

You’ve met six of Felix’s friends, but this man was never introduced to you. Was he a new recruit to their crew? He took a seat next to Chan, the older male slinging an arm around his shoulder as they continued to chatter. You finally walked over to them with a tray of simple snacks before offering them some soda or juice to drink.

“Thanks, sis.” Felix smiled before gesturing to the newcomer you were curious about - you didn’t admit that, though. “By the way, you haven’t met him, but this is Minho!”

“Minho.” you nodded your head, offering a small smile at the strikingly handsome individual.

Oh. So this was the Minho that Felix would always mention when he was talking about one of the best racers in the crew. You wondered why you never saw him when you’d see the other boys though.

He looked towards your direction, lips quirked into a smooth smile with only the corner of his lips lifting, “I finally get to meet the sister Felix keeps talking about.”

“I’m sure he does.” you nodded, ruffling your younger brother’s hair.

For a few more minutes, the boys thanked you for your generosity before sharing stories on how their street races went. You weren’t exactly too fond of hearing stories of cars zooming past empty streets as if the drivers had no care in the world, but for the sake of Felix, you listened and engaged yourself in conversation.

Besides, despite your initial distaste for racing, you couldn’t deny that these boys were good friends not only to Felix, but to you as well; you were particularly close to Changbin who was around the same age as you. Now that everyone helped in cleaning up, you noticed Minho heading for the stairs that led to the rooftop bar of the restaurant. You leaned over to Chan who was next to you by the shelves of drinks, “Does your guy know that this place is closed and he isn’t supposed to be wandering around, especially at the rooftop?”

Chan laughed, “Minho’s…a free-spirit, please forgive him. Just tell him to come back down.”

You nodded, telling Chan to make sure the boys don’t break any plates or steal any food while you dealt with the other male.

When you got up to the rooftop, the first thing you did was to check if Minho went directly to the bar to sneak in a drink or something. To your surprise, he wasn’t. Instead, the male was sitting on one of the stools, elbows rested on the bar counter as he leaned back. His eyes were seemingly glued to the night sky, stars reflecting in his pretty eyes.

You were almost sorry - almost - for breaking whatever mood he was in, but you had to do it.

“You know, this place is strictly off-limits when the restaurants closed. Even Felix doesn’t come up here.”

Minho closed his eyes, a soft chuckle escaping his lips, “Oops, you caught me.”

You tilted your head, sighing, “Come on, Minho. Go back down. Chan and the rest are waiting, I think.”

“They can go home by themselves. We all live separately anyway.” Minho grinned, his gaze now on you.

“Ok, but I’m serious. This place is off-limits.” you mumbled the last bit, “Technically, you guys shouldn’t even be here.”

Minho laughed, and the sound made your heart do a double-take. Your temporary distraction of replaying his laugh allowed the male enough time to get off the stool and make his way behind the bar counter where he found two glasses.

You only snapped from getting lost in replaying his laugh when his voice brought you back to reality. “I’ll go back down, but not after we have a drink. What do you say?” he wiggled his eyebrows playfully.

You let out an exasperated sigh; none of the other boys were this…bold. You didn’t respond to the male, making quick steps so that you were next to him behind the counter. You immediately grabbed the two glasses from him and set them back on the rack on which they were placed in. You raised your hand to hold your index finger up at him, “When I say this place is off-limits, it’s off-limits, Minho. And you are definitely not getting a drink.”

“You’re fiery.” Minho joked, his lips curling into that smooth smile once again, “That’s cute.”

You knew your cheeks were probably redder than the towel lying on the counter, but you chose to ignore that, narrowing your eyes to glare at the male, “You’re unbelievable.”

Minho winked. He winked before breaking into a larger grin, one of his arms now snaked around your waist, “Want me to show you what’s unbelievable, baby?”

You nearly choked, and though you didn’t want to show it, you were much too flustered to make a coherent and solid response. Minho found your stuttering state quite adorable as proven by the amused giggle he let out.

“Hyunjin did say you were cute,” the male smiled, this time less mischievously and more friendly, “but I wasn’t expecting you to be this cute.”

“Minho.” you said through gritted teeth, prying his hand off the curve of your waist, “Felix did mention several times that you were a skilled racer, but he didn’t say you were a big flirt.”

“Flirt?” Minho laughed, shaking his head, “No, no, no, baby. I don’t flirt.”

“Then what is this?” you deadpanned.

Minho winked again, his fingers delicately tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, “Getting to know a new friend perhaps?”

He doesn’t give you the chance to respond as he began to walk towards the stairs leading below. “Still, you’re pretty cute, y/n!” he called out as he descended the steps.

You stood there, dumbfounded, the subtle warmth of his touch still lingering where his fingers brushed against your ear.

Minho was like a gust of wind, passing by quickly to render you speechless with his actions. But it also meant he was fast, leaving you to ponder and figure out what exactly just happened.

It was too quick to comprehend.

You sort of hated speed anyway.

Ever since that encounter, you saw Minho much more often. Well, it’s not like you did it intentionally. Whenever Felix wanted you to hang out with him and the boys after races, Minho would also be there.

You didn’t know if the male was just naturally…charming, but he certainly made some pretty bold advances, flirting even. Changbin said that Minho’s just really playful and does what he wants, so you believed him and reacted with passiveness every time Minho made such moves.

He’d call you pretty almost every chance he got, teasing you about how he wanted to kiss your flushed cheeks, or how your lips looked soft enough to kiss. He’d touch you in subtle ways, either by slinging an arm around your shoulder or snaking it around your waist.

His favorite, however, was when he cupped your face to look directly at your quivering eyes, smirking as he knew the effect he had on you, only to chuckle and let go as if he had no intention of doing anything else.

Things remained like that for a while, until at some point, his “advances” died down, and he started treating you like a normal friend - like how the other boys treated you. He’d flirt from time to time, but you noticed that he was only like that when the other boys were out of sight.

“You’re really easy to read, you know that?” Minho says in amusement, leaning forward on the table as he sat across you.

You glare, rolling your eyes and scoffing at his statement, “I am not.”

Minho just hums, lips curling up into a bigger smile as he reaches a hand up to pinch your cheek, “Y/n, you’re cute, but you’re a horrible liar.”

You swat his hand away, pouting your lips as you pretended to be more focused on the milkshake you were sipping. You didn’t notice that Minho had tilted his head, resting his chin on his palm as he studied your features.

You snap your eyes to look at him, confused as to why he was smiling like that - like he was so amused and entertained at the fact that you were sipping a strawberry milkshake so intently. You didn’t know that he was smiling like that because he found you to be the most fascinating, striking, and charming person he’s ever met.

“What?” you raise an eyebrow skeptically.

Minho was about to open his mouth when Felix and Hyunjin came back to the table with the trays of your orders. “Y/n, compare these to the food you make at Levanter!” Hyunjin teases, taking a seat next to Minho.

You chuckle, “We know the answer to that.”

Felix sits next to you, nodding vigorously before digging into his burger. Hyunjin began to interview him like it was a variety show, causing both you and Felix to laugh. For some reason, you decided to spare a glance at Minho to see if the man actually found such simple things amusing.

Turns out he did as he laughed at Hyunjin’s mock interview with a bright smile. His eyes crinkled at the corners, something you never noticed before.

But before you could even stare at him longer, Minho snapped his gaze to your direction, instantly locking with your eyes. You felt your heart stop as the male’s lips curled into charming smile; as opposed to his cheeky smirks, this one was a gentler, warmer one that had your nerves feeling things.

You smiled back, before shyly looking down at your food to eat.

You learned that Minho could slow down from time to time.

It also came to the point that you started thinking that maybe Minho was actually interested in you because he visited the restaurant while you were working in the afternoon. He never did that, and neither did the boys.

Well, they did, but it was usually as a group to eat lunch or celebrate another street race victory. But Minho would drop by by himself for who knows what reasons. He’d buy coffee and probably a sandwich or cake, and you’d find yourself sitting with him. You’d both talk as friends, but Minho would undoubtedly look at you like you were something much more. You ignored that, thinking that Minho just naturally had stars in his eyes.

Sometimes he’d ask If you wanted to take a breather and go out for a ride with him, but you made excuses like “I need to work” or “you’re not fond of their race cars”, or even admitting that you thought he was moving too fast for “a friend”. You told Felix and Chan about it, and they said that maybe Minho was just bored.

Were you just someone to kill time and boredom for him?

Or did he actually want to see you?

The thought made you laugh and snort in disbelief. Lee Minho was basically your opposite. Someone who liked to live his life with the adrenaline rush of going around freely and quickly wouldn’t like someone who was slower and more careful like you. That would surely bore him.

You hated speed, Minho thrived off of it.

Minho wasn’t keen on living life in a slow pace, but you didn’t mind.

Obviously, Minho wasn’t interested in you that way.

And surely, you weren’t into him as well.

Everything was going fine in the restaurant, so you decided to take a break for the day. Felix was happy to hear that, so he asked if you wanted to tag along with him and the boys while they bonded together at the arcade. You agreed since you wanted to take a breather from working non-stop the past weeks.

You got into Felix’s car, making sure to remind him to drive slowly and safely, much to his amusement and laughter. You and your brother then arrived at the arcade where the other boys met you two. They gave Felix high-fives while they greeted you with bright smiles and happy comments of “getting to hang out with you” again. Minho winked, but that was all he did before Chan instigated that everyone starts going crazy and play some games.

You all played variety of arcade games, a few boys - Changbin and Seungmin - getting a bit to competitive every now and then. The laughter you all shared while having fun was a very nice refresher to your tired state as if it was very much needed.

You often spent your free time doing things by yourself; reading, staying at home, baking, whatever. You usually just spent a lot of time by yourself while your parents constantly traveled and worked, and Felix with the racer boys. You had other friends, but they were just as busy with their careers.

You realized that spending time with the seven racer boys and your brother was a nice change of pace. They lived life at a faster pace compared to your slower tempo, but it was a nice change.

After the arcade shenanigans, the whole group drove to one of their favorite diners for some dinner. Of course, more laughter and conversations took place as you all enjoyed your meal. You asked if they had races scheduled tonight, and they responded that Seungmin didn’t schedule or plan any because they wanted to rest.

An hour or so later, Seungmin, Jeongin, and Hyunjin excused themselves to head home. Chan said he was going to visit his siblings, while Changbin were going to get their cars checked. With the rest making their leave, Felix turns to you and smiles, “Do you want to go home already, sis?”

“Let me guess.” you chuckle, “You still have plans?”

Felix and Jisung, who was still here as well, look at each other before breaking into cheeky grins. “We do…” Jisung trails off, scratching the back of his neck.

“But if you want to go home, I’ll drop you home first!” Felix says with a grin.

You shake your head and ruffle his hair, “I can take the bus…or a taxi.”

Felix looks unsure, considering the time. He knows you do this on a daily basis, but it doesn’t change the fact that he worries over your safety. Well, if you worry for his safety every time he races, he worries about yours every time you go home late at night.

Sensing the younger male’s uneasiness, Minho speaks up with a smile, “I can take y/n home.”

All three of you look at Minho with quizzical looks. The male drapes an arm around your shoulder and chuckles airily, “I’ll drop her off at your place since I was just about to go home as well.” Minho then turns to you, “You can let Felix and Jisung have their fun…whatever plans they have.”

“But I really can go home by myself.” you insist, “I’ve been doing that since forever.”

“Felix worries for your safety, and so do we.” Minho says a bit too smoothly.

Your younger brother nods, “Just for tonight, y/n.”

You contemplate on the idea for a second or two. Eventually, you give in and agree, prompting Felix to grin brightly. He says goodbye and goodnight, giving you one more hug before he and Jisung make their leave.

Minho then gestures for you to follow, leading you to his car. The walk is quiet, but you somehow feel at ease with the male next you. He then opens the door for you, and you get inside. The male goes around to the driver’s side, opening the door to sit on the driver’s seat. With the doors closed and locked, and with the two of you buckled up, Minho starts the engine. But he doesn’t drive just yet.

Instead, he keeps one hand on the steering wheel, the other one on the handbrake, as he turns his head to your direction. “Y/n.” he says.

You hum in response, tilting your head when you face him. Minho has a subtle smirk on, his eyes glimmering even in the darkness his car has due to the tinted windows. “I know I said I would drop you off at home,” he starts, “bit do you mind if we…drive around for a while?”

You look at him with curiosity. Minho always asked if you wanted to go on little drives with him, but you’d always turn him down because you were 1) nervous of being alone in a car with him, and 2) you didn’t know if you’d make an embarrassment of yourself.

But this time, you thought it would be nice to agree for once. You then nod your head, offering a gentle smile, “Let’s go then.”

Minho’s smirk morphs into a brighter smile that shows his bunny teeth, and you end up letting out a little giggle at his reaction. With that, he drives off with an excited twinkle in his eyes.

Unlike Felix, Minho drives significantly faster; it makes him feel alive and free when he does so. He doesn’t mind because he knows he’s still careful even if the car’s speed is swifter than normal. You, on the other hand, grip your seatbelt in fear. It amuses Minho to a point, but he makes sure to give your knee a reassuring pat to let you know that he’s a safe and careful driver.

While Minho continues to speed through an empty stretch of the highway, you take in the sights from the window on your side. You can see the city skyline, its lights reflecting on the surface of the river nearby. It looks like a painting, and you can’t help but make an “o” with your lips as you admire the view.

The lights begin to look like pretty streaks as Minho speeds up, the city become smaller and smaller in the background. It’s a bit hazy, but there was a beauty in the way the scenery turned into a blur of lights.

After a few more minutes, Minho parks his car at a nearby field, gesturing for you to get out as well. Both of you get out of the car and walk around the field as the night breeze caresses your skin. He offers to hold your hand as the terrain becomes a bit uneven, so you allow him to lace his fingers with yours.

You both reach an area where the field is mostly grass, so you let go of Minho’s hand. Perhaps that was one moment where Minho hated moving quickly. He doesn’t say anything, however, and instead gently places the same hand on the small of your back. “The stars look the most amazing from this place.” he whispers.

You look up and instantly agree with a nod of your head. “You’re right.” you smile, scanning the inky sky as the white, glittery stars peppered it like a canvas.

Minho’s lips curl into a small smile as he looks up as well, “Seungmin was the one who found this spot. It’s like our little rest place when we’re not racing.”

“Felix never told me.” you hum.

“Maybe ‘cause you’re a loser, and this place is for winners.” Minho teases playfully.

You scoff before lunging at Minho in retaliation. Your reaction catches him by surprise, but he reacts quick enough to evade your attempt to tackle him. He lets out a little laugh as you both begin to chase each other around the field. “Lee Minho!” you shout.

Minho giggles, stopping in his tracks to stick his tongue out at you. This allows you to catch up to him. While your original intention was to lightly shove him, your momentum caused you to accidentally push harder than you meant, and Minho trips over his feet. He loses his balance, grabbing onto your wrist as he falls on his butt with you in between his legs.

You’re both now staring at each other, frozen in your spot. The embarrassment on your face is evident, and though Minho is smirking, you can make out the faint shade of pink on his cheeks. “I…” you trail off, at a loss for words.

Minho’s lips curl into a smile before he lets out an airy chuckle. He then lays down on his back, eyes glued to the sky above. You stare at him in confusion - and maybe a little amusement - before the male pats the spot next to him. It takes you a few seconds to respond, but when you finally lie down next to him, side-by-side, Minho lets out a contented sigh.

You can feel his arm against yours, but you don’t dwell on how close you are to each other right now. With the initial embarrassment and shyness now fading away, you and Minho begin to point at the stars, making random names for constellations you made on the spot. There was the “The Hyunjin Dipper”, “Changbin’s Belt”, “Chan Major”, and “Jeongin Minor” among others, and before you knew it, you were both cracking up in laughter.

Minutes passed, and with the gentle kiss of the wind and glow of the moon, you fell asleep right then and there. You didn’t expect that, and neither did Minho, but there you were, curled up against his side as soft snores left your lips. The male looked at you fondly, using the back of his knuckles to stroke your cheek. You looked so peaceful like that, so he understood why you liked a slower pace when living your life.

As much as he wanted to slow down time compared to his usually fast-paced lifestyle, he did promise Felix that he’d get you home safely. Minho quietly carried you in his arms, careful not to wake you. He walked back to his car where he gently placed you on the passenger seat. He drove off, heading for yours and Felix’s house.

Upon arriving, Minho piggybacked you, but the door was locked. Felix’s car wasn’t there, so he wasn’t home yet. Your parents weren’t home either - on another business trip - so Minho had to wake you up from your sleep. You mumbled the password for the door’s lock before falling into slumber again. Chuckling to himself, Minho entered the password and entered the house.

He went upstairs, peeking into various rooms until he saw one that seemed very much suitable to be your own room. Pushing the door open fully, he walked over to your bed where he set you down gently. He removed your sneakers and even unhooked some of your dangly earrings for you.

Seeing your sleeping form made Minho feel all warm and fluffy inside. Minho was always told that he lived much too freely and quickly. It’s not like he was The Flash and did everything with two-times the speed, but he just preferred to go along like nothing was holding him down; he liked to live without slowing down because he believed time was always ticking, and he did not like wasting time.

But right now, he felt like it was only right to slow down for a second, allowing him to properly admire your soft and serene features. Time stopped for him, and he carefully combed his fingers through your hair. You let out a soft hum, pursing your lips at the sudden sensation. You slowly peel your eyes open, only to be met by Minho’s gentle gaze.

You break out into a sleepy smile when the male winks at you. “Are we in my room?” you ask.

Minho nods, “Yup. You fell asleep.”

“Hmm.” you sigh, adjusting your position on the bed.

Minho lightly chuckles at your sleepy form rubbing at your eyes. Everything falls silent, and there’s an indescribable tension surrounding the room. You and Minho are staring at each other; the warm haze of your lampshade illuminates Minho’s features in a much softer way, and it makes you want to slowly trace your fingers over every inch of his face.

He doesn’t know what comes over him, but Minho finds himself leaning down until he is mere breaths away from your lips. You can feel his own breath tickling your skin, and if Minho opened his mouth to speak, you were certain you’d feel his lips brush against yours.

But you don’t let him, not yet.

You let out a soft giggle as you plant your hand on his chest, gently pushing him away. “You’re too quick, Minho.” you say with a sleepy voice, “Slow down, ok?”

Minho looks at you with wide eyes and flushed cheeks. It takes him a second to compose himself, eventually breaking out into a playful smirk, “I’ll slow down for you tonight, y/n. But next time, you might want to speed up.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” you laugh before shutting your eyes.

Sleep has taken over your body, and little puffs of air escape your lips as you fall into a peaceful slumber. Minho shakes his head, the amusement too much for him.

He settles for a chaste kiss on your forehead and whispers against your skin, “Speed up, baby. I’ll be waiting.”

You didn’t get to see Minho the next day and a few days after that because you were both busy with your own businesses. Things became busier for you in the restaurant as it was nearly peak season, and Minho had more races with the boys during this time as well.

You kept in touch through the phone, but it was…different to physically be with him. You didn’t know if you could call it love, but there was certainly something there. Minho felt and knew it too, but he took your advice and wanted to “slow down” to make sure he wasn’t mistaking things.

It was late in the afternoon, between the time the sun began to set and when the moon would rise. As usual, after a busy day, you were closing up the restaurant earlier than usual, just about ready to sleep once you got home. You locked the doors just when you heard the familiar sound of an engine behind you. You didn’t turn around just in case this wasn’t one of the racer boys. You heard a car door being opened and shut, and boots scratching against the pavement.

“Hope I’m not too late.”

The familiarity of the voice causes you to smile and chuckle to yourself before turning around. You’re met with Minho leaning against his car, arms crossed as he gives you a playful salute. You shake your head with a giggle, “I’m afraid you’re too slow, Minho. You can’t get any more coffee.”

Minho laughs, pushing himself off his car, “Too bad. Well, if that’s the case, want to go on a ride instead?”

You pretend to think about it, prompting Minho to playfully pout. You respond with a giggle before nodding your head, “Alright, just for a while.”

Minho asks about your day, and you tell him about how busy you were. In return, you ask about their recent race, and Minho recalls the events with so much liveliness, gushing on about his car and the rest of the boys. His enthusiasm and passion reminds you of Felix’s, and it’s honestly such an endearing sight.

You eventually arrive at the same field as the last time Minho took you our for a ride. You both get out of the car, and this time, since the sun was still slightly up and giving you enough light, you both wandered around longer, randomly admiring the flowers that were there. You’d also name some of the clouds and imagined them in various shapes, once again erupting into hearty laughter.

After a while, you both walk back towards the car where Minho lets out a sigh as he sits on the hood. You sit next to him, admiring the way the sky is painted with hues of purple, orange and pink with a subtle blue crawling in. You take note of how Minho’s eyes are closed as he lets the breeze kiss his skin and ruffle his hair which was now a beautiful shade of red-orange. How nice it was that it matched the sky.

“Minho?”

“Hmm?”

You give him a gentle smile and ask, “The boys used to mention that you rarely hung out with them after races, which is why I didn’t meet you when I met everyone else before.”

The male offers you an amused smile before turning his gaze back to the sky, “It’s not that I don’t hang out with them. I do, especially when they’re celebrating. But most of the time, when our races are finished, I choose to still drive around. Like…with no particular destination. I just like the feeling and satisfaction driving freely gives me. It makes me feel free.”

You nod in understanding, humming and chuckling softly, “We really are opposites. It’s cute, I guess.”

Minho smirks, turning back to you, “Cute? I guess.”

“If you’re so fond of living like you’re rushing into everything,” you start, staring at him with genuine warmth, “why do you like spending so much time with me?”

“Easy.” Minho responds, reaching his hand to yours so he can lace his fingers with yours, “It’s because you let me slow down to appreciate things better. You’re the only one who can make me stop and take slower steps, even when I want to just do what I want, when I want to.”

You feel your cheeks burning up at his words, and your speechless state allows Minho to pull on your arm, tugging you stand between his legs. Both his hands are now clasped around yours as he stares up at you with adoration; there’s no other way to describe the way he’s looking at you except for adoration.

“You’re the one who showed me the beauty of taking things slow every now and then.” Minho whispers lowly, his lips curling into a very Minho-like smile, “With you, I don’t want time to go by so quickly. I want to slow everything down so that I can be with you for as long as I can.”

“Why?” you ask, your voice smaller than you intended.

“Because I like you.” Minho giggles, squeezing your hands tighter, “I understand that you might think I’m moving too fast for you, but I just really - ”

Minho never gets to finish because your lips are now on his. Again, you catch him by surprise as he was not expecting you of all people to do that. Still, he regains his senses and kisses back instantly. He savors the feeling of your lips on his at last, and yes, they are soft just like he thought. You pull away much too quickly for his liking, but he doesn’t mind because you let go of his hands to coil them around his neck.

“I like you too, Minho.” you lean your forehead against his, smiling giddily, “I wasn’t sure you’d feel the same because…we aren’t exactly on the same tempo here, but I guess I was wrong.”

“I can slow down and you can speed up?” Minho teases.

You laugh, nodding your head as you press a kiss to his nose, “You say you learned to take things slow because of me. Well, I learned that it’s alright to be quick from time to time. I still don’t believe in rushing things, but there’s nothing wrong with living with a fast pace from time to time.”

Minho hums in satisfaction, lips curled into another smile. His hands are now on your waist as he directs you to sit on his lap. You follow his guidance, settling on his lap as his arms wrap around you. “You and I make a perfect balance, you know?” Minho whispers against your lips.

You nod, smiling in response, “That’s true.”

Neither of you say anything else, letting your lips do all the talking. As Minho stated, you were both a perfect balance; even the kiss you shared was a perfect balance, not too rushed, but not too slow either. It was a beautiful mix of both your favored tempos, allowing your lips to delightfully melt together as if they were puzzle pieces meant for each other.

The sun is now on its last moments before saying goodbye, the sky’s warm hues now greeted by the cooler tones of the early evening. The mixture of both hues makes everything much more beautiful, painting both you and Minho in an ethereal light.

You both pull away to giggle giddily, prompting you to wrap your arms around Minho’s neck tighter. Minho laughs as he hugs you, burying his face by the crook of your neck. You play with the little hairs on his nape, listening to the gentle beating of his heart.

Ironically, your heart was beating quickly while his was much calmer.

But those opposing forces made a beautiful rhythm that both you and Minho could find rest and enjoyment in.

A beautiful state of equilibrium.

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come-on-shitty-boys · 4 years

Text

Selfish Fools. Nishinoya Yuu

Request: Could you do a noya x reader one shot maybe? Like the reader is a first year and she has a huge crush and she might be a new manager? Or a run in? Or maybe a tutoring sessions? Idk something cute? But I think Y/N as a first year and calling him Noya-senpai would be super cute!

Warnings: none

Word count: 1.6K

Notes: I’m finishing this up at like 5 a.m. and my god i really just want an iced vanilla americano.

Describe yourself in one word: Foolish.

To think that he would notice you of all people? It makes you scoff at the mere thought. You were a fool, a first rate clown. He was your friend and nothing else. He had been there to show you around on the first day of school when you accidentally mistook him for a first year. He had given you a mildly offended “Hey,” but laughed when you had started apologizing a million times.

Yeah, if you could describe yourself in one word, it would be foolish. Nishinoya Yuu saw you as nothing more than a friend while you were wanting nothing but to be more than that. But, he made your tongue twist into knots whenever you tried to speak. He could ask you as something as simple as “How was your day?” and you would be stuttering over your words just to get out a coherent response.

Everything about him, from his outward bad boy appearance to his energetic personality, had the blood rushing to your face, bringing out a bright blush at the simple thought of his eager brown eyes staring into your own. He was sweeter than you would have ever imagined. Constantly sending you messages to make sure that you were taking care of yourself. Sending pictures of things that made him think of you. Walking you home on those rare days when he didn’t have volleyball practice. He constantly showered you in praise, telling you how proud he was when you did well on a test that you had been worried about. He was the perfect friend, but that’s all he was. A friend.

It was foolish of you to think that Nishinoya would ever see you as anything more. You saw the way that he looked at Kiyoko. The light behind his eyes was different when he was with you. His eyes were softer, less eager for attention than the ones he used to examine the beautiful manager. Nishinoya was almost a completely different person around you than he was around Kiyoko, but you couldn’t really blame him. She was stunning and you were just some first year that he had, for some reason, chosen to befriend.

Sundays were reserved for the two of you to get lost in the immense piles of homework that had been sent home for the weekend. A kitchen table and various snacks being the only tangible thing separating you. But, the heavy sense of awkwardness hung thickly in the air. It was the best you could do to keep your head down, trying your very best to focus on your work and push away the thoughts of the young man across from you that kept flooding your mind.

Describe yourself in one word: Scared.

If Nishinoya Yuu could choose anything to describe himself in this moment, it would be that. He never knew how to approach the topic that he had been so desperate to finally discuss with you, but he would look at your face, your pretty smile, and chicken out, not wanting to ruin anything that the two of you had. The gap between friends and couple seemed nearly impossible to cross.

“Dude, the worst that will happen is she says she’s not into you. Just do it.”

“What if she doesn’t want to be friends anymore? What if I just ruin everything, Tanaka?”

Everyone in the vicinity who had heard him voice his concerns to Tanaka had told him that he was thinking about it too much. “Why would she say no?” “Have you seen how she looks at you? She’s totally into you!” “It’s easy. You’ve asked Kiyoko out a hundred times.”

But, this- this was different. This wasn’t some silly school boy crush that he knew wasn’t going to ever happen. He had come to know you like the back of his hand. You had become one of his closest friends and the thought that he could lose it all with one simple question ruined any sort of confidence that he had.

He was scared. Terrified might be a better description though. He could feel his chest tighten at the simple thought of confronting this dragon. It had been a long time since Nishinoya had felt this level of fear about anything. Fear closed windows of opportunities and he knew that this was the case here, but if it meant that he could continue having you in his life? He’d let that window stay closed.

You looked so peaceful, sitting across from him at the table, head buried in your homework. Strands of your hair kept slipping into your eyes and Noya found himself lost in the repetitive motion of you sweeping them back behind your ear. You had the cap of your ink pen stuck between your teeth, deep in thought, as if you didn’t even notice that he was there.

It was these moments of simple beauty that pulled Nishinoya further and further in love with you. Over his months of friendship with you, it was always these really simple moments that he cherished more than anything else. Doing homework together or just sitting on the floor of his living room, marathoning movies in pajamas with a bowl of popcorn tucked securely between the two of you, the physical barrier, his personal reminder that he shouldn’t lean over and wrap his arms around you to pull you into his lap.

There was a heavy sigh that left your lips as you sat your pen down, leaning back in your seat. It was enough warning for him to snap his head down to his own page to pretend that he was just as hard at work as you had been. He leaned forward on his knee, pressing his elbow into his thigh in a desperate attempt to stop the nervous bouncing of his leg.

He shouldn’t be this scared. He’d asked people out before. This shouldn’t be any different. You were just another person that he had a crush on. A simple, “Do you want to go on a date with me?” was all that it would take. That’s it. It was easy, but anytime that he even tried to utter out that question, it was like his voice stopped working.

“Hey, Noya?” Your voice echoes through his ears, forcing him to slowly raise his head to look at you. “Can you help me?”

“O-oh, yeah. I can try,” he answers, the shake in his voice obvious even to him. But, you seemed to be so lost in your problem that you didn’t even notice the tremor in his hand as he sat down next to you, taking your pen from you, so he can show you how to work out the math problem on your paper.

Describe yourself in one word: Distracted

The feeling of Nishinoya’s slim shoulder pressed against yours as he walked you through the problem brought your head into a heavy haze, unable to concentrate on what he was saying and the numbers that he was scrawling across your page. Before you knew it, he was circling in a sloppy 7/19 and you had no idea where he got that.

“Did that make sense?”

No. I was too busy thinking about you.

“Yeah. Thank you.”

It should’ve been his cue to leave, but the little libero stayed where he was, shoulder pressed against yours. You would’ve loved to continue working, but you knew that you would never be able to think about the numbers on your page with his close proximity. If you could just lean over and kiss him-

But, you couldn’t do that. You didn’t want to have to look at him after he inevitably pushed you away from him, a disgusted look on his face. You couldn’t run the risk of ruining everything for your own selfish feelings, but he looked so cute sitting beside you, leg bouncing as he got lost in his own thoughts.

Describe yourself in one word: Selfish

It was selfish and greedy for him to do it. He was thinking only of himself and how he felt right there and then. He was thinking about how cute you were when you smiled and how beautiful the sound of your laugh was. Nishinoya was wondering what Chapstick flavor you had used that day. Was it the cherry that he had watched you apply so many times or did you use the peach one that you just bought? He was wondering how it would taste against his own lips.

He was selfish and he shouldn’t have done it, but his hand was turning your face towards his before he could catch himself. Your eyes were wide and confused, but even so, you were the one who closed the gap, pushing your lips to his in a kiss that had him melting under the simplicity of it and the feeling of your hands resting on his thighs.

It made his head spin and, if he was honest, he’d be okay if it never stopped. There were short breathless pauses of smiles and foreheads pressed together before lips connected again, desperate to remember that this wasn’t just a dream, that this was really happening, and that neither of you were shoving the other away.

He was selfish for wanting to taste that peach flavored Chapstick one more time.

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #Nishinoya Yuu #nishinoya #yuu #nishinoya x reader #x reader #imagines #i probably scrapped this three times before finally getting an idea that i was happy with #but no cap #the peaches and cream chapstick slaps

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atomicse · 4 years

Note

juliantina au 3 + trope 2 + prompt 34

i didn’t think i would get any of these… but let’s go!

spy!au + enemies to lovers + “i don’t even know why we’re doing this.”

(idk if this is any good [or coherent] but i wrote it at 3am so pls be kind. also i don’t think this is what u wanted anon, but…)

“god, this is so boring, this dude hasn’t done anything all day. i don’t even know why we’re doing this.”

juliana rolls her eyes. of all the people they could’ve paired her with, they had to put her with the obnoxious, trust fund baby. “because it’s our job?” she snarks.

the other girl sends juliana what she probably thinks is a murderous glare, but her bright blue eyes and disney princess aura make her look as intimidating as baby yoda. “i’ve worked with this organization for years, i don’t do stakeouts, i do real, important, shit.”

juliana doesn’t say anything, she won’t even try to fight this petulant little girl.

“whatever.” carvajal huffs. minutes pass without her externalizing her displeasure of the situation, and juliana dares to think that maybe, just maybe, she won’t have to deal with her attitude for the rest of their shared stakeout when, “i can’t believe mr. g put me with you.”

“what is that supposed to mean?” juliana asks with a raised eyebrow.

“we’re like, the worst possible combination he could’ve come up with.“ the brunette shrugs nonchalantly. juliana just stares at her. “you’re like, this angsty loner type, and i’m… i don’t know, the kind of agent that has a sense of humor and isn’t brooding 24/7”, she explains.

juliana can’t help but snort, that’s rich coming from her. she’s never worked side by side with the other agent before, -they’ve actually only ever conversed twice, once when she first joined the organization, and right now-, but it is common knowledge that carvajal has this sort of hero complex, people say she’s always hell bent on saving the day. “aren’t you the one that’s always putting herself at risk just to be the hero or whatever?” she sneers. “i would appreciate it if you dropped your preconceived incorrect ideas about me. you don’t know me.” juliana frowns.

“and i don’t want to” carvajal shakes her head, turning to look at their mark.

“well, i don’t either.”

“fine.”

they both stare out the window, silently waiting for the man on the other side of the street to get into his vehicle. once he does, carvajal turns on the engine and drives off without saying a word.

juliana sighs in the passenger’s seat, she doesn’t understand why the other girl hates her so much.

after following their mark for hours and trying to gather as much information about him as possible, they decide to approach him on his last stop of the day, a stupidly exclusive casino on the most expensive side of town.

they get out of the car and juliana thanks whatever entity is looking out for them because they let them in, no questions asked.

“okay so, i’m going to go explore the place,” juliana says, already seeing lots of people she thinks might be useful to their mission. “you should go with aguayo, maybe you can get some info directly from him.”

carvajal gives her a weird look “why me?”

“because i’m too much of a broody loner, no?” juliana reminds her “and you’re a lot easier on the eyes” she adds after a beat.

“did you just call me pretty?” the brunette smirks.

juliana blushes an embarrassing shade of pink, “shut up, just go.” she throws over her shoulder as she makes what she hopes is a smooth exit.

an hour and a half after their separation, juliana has already scooped out the area in search for any suspicious activity (and downed three shots of tequila). she’s sitting at the bar, half-heartedly conversing with the friendly bartender while waiting for her partner to finish whatever she’s doing to subtly interrogate their mark.

“hello, gorgeous, you havin’ fun?” she hears a voice say to her. when she turns, she finds a disheveled man eyeing her lustfully.

juliana’s stomach churns, the way he’s staring at her is painfully reminiscent of the many times man just like this one would look and treat her and her mom like they only existed for their twisted enjoyment when she was young.

she’s since stopped being afraid, she is the company’s best asset, but for some reason, she finds herself paralyzed while the unknown man reaches to grab at her.

juliana’s alcohol dazed brain is just catching up, coming up with a half-baked plan to simply kick this man’s balls off when a sickenly sweet voice captures their attention. “hey, sir, i think you should go find someone more age appropriate.” her partner smiles at her over the man’s shoulder and juliana has never been more relieved to see that annoying little dimple on the brunette’s cheek. “besides, this one’s spoken for.” carvajal adds cheekily.

juliana feels the blood rush to her cheeks and curses herself for falling victim to the brunette’s charm.

the man smirks as he looks between them, surely imagining a whole lot of disgusting things that make juliana want to go back to her plan of just ending his bloodline. “can i join?” he leers at them.

her partner scowls at him and takes juliana’s hand, swiftly removing them from the situation before it escalates.

“can’t leave you alone for a second, can i, agent valdés?” ugh, of course she has to ruin it just when juliana’s starting to like her.

“whatever.” juliana crosses her arms over her chest. “did you get anything out of him?” she inquires, hoping that the other woman’s charm had worked with aguayo just as much as it seemed to work with her.

carvajal nods happily, “yeah, dude’s a total lightweight!” she laughs, “a couple of shots of mezcal and he was ready to spill all his secrets to me.” juliana snorts, she guesses that carvajal must’ve had her fair share of drinking too, since she’s being so buddy-buddy with her. “i thought narco leaders were… different.” the brunette says pensively.

the woman’s attitude is giving juliana whiplash, before she’d treated her like shit, and now she’d being almost nice. “um, right. did you get any relevant stuff for our investigation?” juliana doesn’t want to be here any longer than necessary.

“yeah, i recorded our entire chat. there’s some juicy shit there.” carvajal shows juliana her phone, a forty-minute audio recording sits on her recently saved files.

“good job.” she awkwardly pats her partner on the back.

carvajal scoffs. “it was better than good and you know it.” she leans down so her and juliana’s faces are dangerously close, “c’mon, v, tell me i was amazing.” she pouts.

damn her and her stupid wide blue eyes and her perfectly shaped lips and- woah, juliana is more than a little buzzed too. “no, ya vámonos, carvajal. we gotta attend the briefing tom-” she starts to ramble when surprisingly strong arms wrap around her waist and soft lips crash into hers.

juliana has kissed people before, of course she has, she’s kissed her fair share of girls, even a few boys during games like spin the bottle or truth or dare when she was in middle school, but no one has ever made her stomach flip like this infuriating woman right here. the way carvajal gently sucks on juliana’s bottom lip makes her brain malfunction.

they kiss for what seems like an eternity, only separating when their lungs demand air.

juliana blinks dazedly at carvajal when she calms herself down enough to hold the other woman’s gaze without jumping her. “what was that?” she asks.

“the creepy dude from before was pissing me off, looked at you like you were a piece of meat” carvajal explains without letting go of juliana “also, you were talking too much” she winks.

juliana process the information for a second. “so…” she trails off “… are we done here?” she asks as casually as she can. the kiss left her a little shaken, she can’t wait until she gets home for a nice hot bath -or a cold shower.

“yeah, just let me go grab a bottle of water. i need to sober up a little in case we bump into el alcoholímetro.” the brunette finally lets go of juliana.

juliana nods dumbly before going after her, she really needs to sober up too.

“thank you for the ride.” juliana says quietly. carvajal had taken her home instead of just dropping her off at the subway station like she had suggested, claiming that she would never let someone take the subway at that hour, even if they annoyed her as much as juliana. (hero complex)

carvajal gives her a dorky thumbs up as she gets out of the car. “night, valdés, don’t let the bed bugs bite!” juliana can’t help but smile back.

this day was so weird; first, being paired with carvajal had been unexpected, second, the other agent had been hostile towards her for no apparent reason, then treated her obnoxiously nicely, and third, she actually kind of liked carvajal, a little bit.

“do you want to… stay the night?” she asks with an amount of courage she didn’t know she was capable of mustering.

carvajal smirks, “are you propositioning me?”

“it’s late, you shouldn’t be out” juliana explains. “and i have a spare room.”

the brunette seems to think it through and juliana scolds herself for offering, you idiot this is none of you business. “sure, yeah.” oh.

“cool. c’mon i- i’ll show you” juliana stutters a half assed explanation of her home’s layout to her partner while said partner just looks at her amusedly.

“relax, valdés” carvajal chuckles. “i’m not going to bite you …unless you want to.”

juliana scoffs, why is she suddenly flirting with her? “didn’t you hate me this morning?”

“i don’t hate anyone, though i did dislike you a little, but i’ve always been a sucker for pretty girls.” she steps into juliana’s personal space.

“i-”

carvajal cuts her off “shut up, valdés, you know exactly why you invited me over.”

then, she joins their lips together, sucking on juliana’s bottom lip like she had an hour ago, and it is just as glorious.

#prompt game #anonymous #asks #juliantina #juliantina fic #yo idk what this is so don't even ask #long post #this is a mess luv

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callioope · 4 years

Text

Finally finished Community! Thoughts below. I can’t say they’re coherent or insightful, but thoughts below. I’m still sorta processing everything so I’m not even sure I’ll settle on these thoughts, but they are my immediate impressions after binging this thing in 2.5 weeks. (Whew!)

First, a preface: Prior to this binge session, I had seen one episode many years ago, but whatever episode that was I have no idea because none of them felt familiar to me. More importantly, though, I used to see a lot of Jeff/Annie stuff in my dash back when the show was still airing. So, that informs my preconceptions of the show before I started.

Overall impressions:

The first three seasons are pretty solid, and honestly I didn’t really feel like season 4 missed a beat from them. At some point towards the end of season 4, or maybe early season 5, I stumbled on the season 4 controversy and was pretty surprised because I still enjoyed it. Season 5 actually felt like the beginning of a decline and season 6, whew. That was almost painful to watch. It felt pretty dry, lacking in the show’s original magic, and definitely forced, which was even addressed in the season finale. And speaking of the finale, despite some brief entertaining meta moments, it didn’t really feel like a good ending for the whole thing. But I suppose we’re still due that movie, right?

What I loved about the show was how much fun it had and the relationships between the characters. It seemed to do a good job of shaking up interactions so we got to see different sets of characters interacting. Troy and Abed’s dynamic was the most interesting to me (I think I’m going to have “Troy and Abed in the mooorning!” stuck in my head lol). The blanket fort episodes were pretty great.

Couldn’t stand Britta/Jeff moments. Didn’t like the idea of the woman Jeff just wanted to bang finally giving in. Would have been terrible if that had ended up (man did I hate the set up at the end of season 5! fortunately that seemed to be a ruse to make a point, like Jeff and Britta getting together “just because it was how the show started” wasn’t really a realistic ending. I’m looking at you How I Met Your Mother. I bet that was intentional. It probably was? When did HIMYM end? I have no idea because time stopped making sense after I graduated college.

Troy/Britta was interesting, and I was into it, but when it fizzled out that also made sense. Troy/Abed, hmm? Idk. Maybe. Haven’t settled on that. I sorta feel like they’re missing a person, like they should be Troy/Abed/??? I just feel like they have that dynamic where they need a third person. But who? Britta? Eh. Idk.

Speaking of Troy, I really wished he could have made it back for the finale, at least! That was sad.

And now for no reasonable transition but just because I just binged 6 seasons in 2.5 weeks and am trying to remember all my thoughts throughout: Chang. Chang was pretty annoying. Honestly it was a miracle I made it through season 1, I made it through in spite of him. He was better when he wasn’t a teacher anymore but still kind of grating. Not my brand of humor, sorry.

Let’s see, what else? Oh, Pierce was also awful. In a different way from Chang but still pretty unbearable. Does it make a difference that I’m watching this post #metoo? Or did everyone agree he was unlikeable from the start? I rarely found anything redeeming about his character and he always felt like he just didn’t fit. (Side note that I had no idea Chevy Chase was in Community until I watched the pilot! It’s funny how much tumblr manages to spoil with gifsets and also not spoil.)

Jumping around again -- so I obviously knew Donald Glover was in Community but I feel like. The next time I watch Solo. That it’s going to be very weird seeing Troy there. Mostly because I know if it was Troy playing Lando it would be mindblowing to him. I hope whenever they make the movie there can be some throwaway reference to this.)

(also oh shit but i did not realize until I looked it up on imdb during like season 3 but Annie!!! was Trudy!!! in Mad Men!!! I did learn this fact before the Don Draper reference)

The Dean’s weird obvious crush on Jeff sort of made me uncomfortable. i mean the parts where he clearly fantasizes about jeff (the puppet thing for example). outside of that I thought the dean had some good moments, and I enjoyed the plot with the study group rescuing him from chang, but whenever he weirdly hit on Jeffrey it felt like negative representation. sort of like “look at this sex-crazed deviant harassing jeff” and that was bad. i mean it felt like harassment. is this supposed to be some sort of comeuppance for Jeff’s womanizing ways? If so it still feels off to me. Is there something I was missing there? I don’t want to upset anyone or be out of touch since I’m the noob here so please if I’m off let me know.

What else??? I’m probably forgetting so much because I watched it so quickly. Everything’s sort of merging together.

Oh! Britta!! I did see in a negative review that Britta’s character kind of got screwed with and I do agree with that. I wasn’t a big fan of Britta but it did seem like her character development (what development) really stalled. And the jokes about her being terrible at psychology were overdone. I get that she’s supposed to be the screw up but let her have something she’s good at? I guess. I mean I guess she did end up helping people so it sorta worked out but idk, didn’t feel like they put her character to good use after season 4.

I’m saving Jeff/Annie for last. As I stated above I was predisposed to thinking this was gonna be like THE ship of the show. I didn’t hate it, but it definitely wasn’t what I was expecting, namely because I didn’t realize the age thing was going to be such a prominent part of it. (Didn’t realize the age gap from the gifsets! ...or at least didn’t remember it) I do get the chemistry there, but there were some scenes that felt really awkward to me. I was waiting for it to get better and it sort of had its ups and downs. Loved the “teamwork” dynamic to their scenes, but sorta hated the paternal vibe. Jeff’s “I do this as a coping mechanism so I don’t have to address my feelings for you” sorta made sense, buuuut I also thought that scene Got Weird. Also didn’t feel like we got sufficient closure. Maybe we weren’t supposed to. But I felt like for as much weight as they tried to lend it at the end, there could have been more obvious development and build up towards it. Like, for as much time as Annie clearly spent pining over Jeff throughout the whole show, she really didn’t play a large role herself in the final episode. In one scene, I think it was one of the pitches, someone tells Jeff he’s not really thinking about what Annie wants, and I would have liked Annie to have a chance to speak to that, but even when Jeff finally admits he “let her go,” she barely says anything. So, idk.

I worry that the movie would reset the status quo. I don’t really like that kind of thing, when season after season there’s no real progress made. It was a staple of sitcoms, sorta the point, but I like a show that an be funny and have character growth. (I’m looking at you, The Good Place! not every show can be the Good Place...) It did feel like we got character growth here. I think what I’m actually worried about is the Gilmore Girls Effect, where it’s allegedly ten years later and nothing has changed. That was a disaster. If they do a movie, I hope they think realistically about where the characters would have gone during the time that elapsed. Like reasonably.

Anyways. Those are some very loose thoughts I basically just word-vomited immediately after finishing the last episode. It’s definitely possible I missed some things, as I was sewing masks during most of season 6 and some of season 5. And I watched them really fast in general. So who knows what I’m forgetting. It’s all a blur. I’m gonna stop myself before I embarrass myself even further. And probably go read some fic. Yeah.

#really debating if I want to tag this or not #i don't know this fandom and i always feel weird putting posts in a tag when i'm new there #so what i'm going to do is stall and fill up the first five tags with commentary #and then i'll throw the tag after the first five #and then i'll see this post in the tag anyways because that's happened #and maybe even after years I don't understand how tumbler's tagging system works?#bc i always thought if you tagged outside the first five tags it wouldn't show up in the tag #but i've definitely seen posts that do #so IDK #*throws hands*#anyways i do want to tag this for my own blog organization so #community #the latest with liz

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hoezier · 5 years

Note

I'm really curious to see what you think of the episode once you watch it because I thought it wasn't that bad tbh

Hey nonnie, so I just finished watching the episode and I’m ... conflicted. I’m conflicted by my reactions towards this show since the Michael’s return SL ended tbh. In the first 7 episodes, I so obviously disliked the storylines and where it was headed but afterwards my reactions were not so resentful. I became a lot more ... conflicted because the writing is not obviously bad or bad bad, it just became confused, unfocused, rushed and somewhat inconsistent. Somewhat, being a generous qualification on my part tbh. So, I’m gonna try to break it down here. Keep in mind, though, that I haven’t given a ton of thought to what the show has had to offer in a while now. It seemed futile to me, primarily, but also, because I’ve been far too busy to actually spare too much energy here. Nonetheless, here it goes:

First and foremost, the romance in this season fell on its face in a lot of way. Starting with the main romances of Petramos and Jafael.

1. Petramos: In a lot of ways, the trouble of Petramos is a lot easier to spot for me, a little more obvious, and a little less complicated than jafael’s, more contained than Jafael’s. Probably due to the shorter history of the relationship. I think the controversial revelation that Petra’s been lying to JR about Anezka this whole time was detrimental to the relationship in a nearly unfixable way. To fix it would need care and finesse and patience and build-up. JtV has always had some trouble with all of that, what’s with it being so dramatic and over-the-top, but I think it’s struggled to achieve nuanced writing especially this season. In that way, Petramos’s writing has been doomed since the very start of the season. Like fine, okay, you went ahead with the Petra lying, something that I won’t even get into how unlikely it seems to me, but the relationship needed a LOT more care than what they gave it. Having JR choose to get back with Petra so prematurely only to have them break-up later on did NOT do the writers any favor. Their reunion was rushed, their build-up was quick and a lot of it off-screen. And then their break-up was a disaster writing-wise. It wasn’t heartbreaking, it was angering and insulting to me as a viewer who has functioning braincells thank you very much. It was done for drama and did not really follow coherently, especially with the add-on of Petra wanting to propose and all that. It just fell on its face. For me, a much better way to deal with the situation would have been to let their season 4 break up land throughout the first half of the season, then come up with a reason for a rekindling, a tentative alliance, a careful build up that leaves me squealing like a schoolgirl when they reunite. Have Petra go through the journey of getting over JR in the first half, have her go through that character growth, and THEN reunite them. And here’s the thing, I’m still about 99% sure that Petramos is endgame, but we’re literally supposed to get the reunion and the endgame in ONE episode, an episode that’ll largely be about Jafael so like... IDEK man. This’ll be really hard to sell beyond the aesthetics of two gorgeous people getting together on your screen.

2. Jafael: I have SO many conflicting emotions about Jafael this season. Don’t get me wrong, I love them, I ship them. I always will. And we did get some really good material over the course of the season, but boy oh boy, do I have problems with how this is all panning out. First and foremost, the treatment of this relationship with Michael’s return has been disastrous, and i think we can all agree on that. Like okay, fine, you want to reach this point of breaking up. Okay fine. You want to reintroduce the love triangle. Okay fine, but pray tell, what the actual fuck was that treatment of the storyline? I was genuinely excited about the potential for angst that this’ll give Jafael. I wanted the pain and the heartbreak, I wanted Rafael to be the one to break up with Jane because he just does not want to do this anymore, but the way they went about it was confusing to me. For example, I loved the idea of “Rafael got his memories back, too”. I thought that was clever, but to me the trigger of it was not as clever. Remember back in season 1 when Raf proposed and then he saw her laughing with Michael and that kind of contributed to sending him spiraling? Yeah, I needed something like that. Something to remind Rafael and the audience of this journey, a physical evidence of that trouble in front of him. We got none of that of course. And then we had to deal with the whole Mateo thing and Mateo’s feelings and involvement and it was so not the right focus. It lacked feeling, it lacked heart, it lacked things that were genuinely a part of the core of Jane as a show. The whole point of Michael returning was supposed to be the emotional baggage of it all, but it turns out JtV was truly not at all equipped to handle something with that complexity. So the break up was a bit of a mess in that regards and I’m just... yeah. Let’s just leave it there for now.

Because what was even more aggravating than the break-up, is their reunion. I’m not gonna get into the whole thing about Raf’s depression here (see below the section about characters), but what I will get into here is, how in fuck’s name did we get a whole reunion SL without even a glimpse of what, exactly, was going through Raf’s mind as he went through therapy? Like just how? How did he come to not trust her? How did he come to realize that he’ll always love her? What the f was going on in his mind this whole time? Was he pining in his own way, too? Okay, fine, you don’t want to give us this storyline about his depression (why thank you, fuck you too), but can you uhhh, IDK give us a SL about them getting through their issues. Remember Jafael in season 1 and 2 going to therapy to hash out their trouble? I miss those days. I’m honestly beyond flabbergasted that they did not immediately march into a therapist’s office and try to fix their trouble. That would’ve made their whole journey come full circle. It would have helped dissect their problems. His and hers. How they’l move on. How they’ve grown together. You know, the kind of stuff you do when you tell a person that you don’t trust them anymore but you also really love them? Remember the proposal episode? Yeah, how the F did we not get a we’re going to therapy SL afterwards? And now, in 5x17, Raf is like I’m not worried about MIchael trying to win you back again, anymore. And I’m like, k, cool, but why? We have seen very little development in that regards, can you please explain it better? Can you please show me more? PLEASE? But I guess not, and it is what it is now.

In a lot of ways, Jafael’s trouble is that the show is trying to cram 2 or more seasons worth of buildup and SL into half a season, half a season whose focus has been disastrous to say the least. So yeah, the reunion has been tainted for me with a lot of trouble. And now, thinking about it, I actually can’t find very clear ways in which Jafael’s journey this season could have been fixed wih easy and simple shuffling of certain events. To truly make it pop, they NEEDED to delve deep into Rafael’s mental health, which is not a simple fix in itself. Otherwise, this only partially satisfactory stuff is all we are left with. In my mind right now, I think I would have gone much farther back, though, and tweaked their story to maintain the Michael returns SL without it making the story so bland and aggravating. I think I wouldn’t have let Jafael get together at all in season 4. Rafael, following that breakdown he had with Jane in 4x05 goes to therapy. Jane has a romance with Adam that runs its course. Jafael rebuild their friendship and start to catch feelings again. They’re really falling in love and about to get back together when BAM Michael returns. I think that would have worked for the purposes of the triangle more. Jane is not really committed to anyone, except now she’s in love with Raf. And it would have made even her choice more powerful. But alas, it is what it is. But even more ideally, IDK, come up with a more creative obstacle than Michael’s return.

3. Villadero: Honestly, I’m only gonna talk about them to vent, cause I’m MAD, you guys, so MAD and I don’t even ship it. But I’m MAAAAAD. Like just... okay, okay, you take all of season 5 and it’s literally just Jennie shitting on M/J and I’m like what the actual fuck? The blows never stopped coming? Michael returning only to have his heart broken all over again not enough for ya? Having to see Mateo say that he hates him not enough? Oh, no, it’s not. We gotta not only make the book about their relationship a flop (which like, fine, as an aspiring writer it’s cool to see this being a more complicated journey for Jane than an immediate hit) but to also have its publication be a literal bribery? Why?? JUST WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY? And then to imply that M/J where just a step for Jafael and M/C now?????????????????? WHY WHY WHY???????????????????? Remember the show that had Jane worry that her moving on with Raf would make it seem as if Michael is just a step? I want that show back. I just... UGH.

Characters and characterization is another thing that the show really struggled with this season. Like a LOT.

1. Petra: I’ll start with Petra because I honestly think she got the better deal out of everyone. This season has really managed to highlight and showcase how much she’s grown and how far she’s come. I think aside from the supposed plan to propose to JR, Petra has been the least inconsistent this season. Though she did have lines that showed real amnesia on the writers part, like telling Jane that JR is the reason she doesn’t lie and manipulate anymore. But oh well, she did well.

2. Jane: I feel like Jane has lost a lot of her vibrance this season. I can’t really pin point why, but I think it’s a combination of reducing her to her bouts of guilt, the weird way that they’ve dealt with her career this season, fluctuating between utter disregard and then literal cramming of episodes worth of her writing development into half an episode (I mean Ro has FAAAAAAAR more build up towards This is Mars than Jane has with her book) it’s been really hard to see the life that Jane exuded in the past.

3. Rafael: I’m tired. I don’t wanna talk about it. I’m just tired.

4. Michael: Also tired. I just wanted him to feel like a person with emotions and trauma but like... *rubs forehead*

5. Xiomara: This makes me the MOST tired. She faded into the background so much I want to ram my head through a wall. Like what the fuck man just what the fuck? The build up of her going to nursing school came from no where. Now she’s willing to go to NY so quickly? No struggle? All the struggle is on Ro’s part? Why just why I don’t understand how the writers who gave us Xo from season 1-4 can just suddenly forget. Even the wrap up of her cancer SL was anticlimactic. It’s just.

Also, Luisa deserves better.

Another thing that season severely struggles with is focus. So much screentime for Jorge and Alba and it’s just not that interesting of a SL. So much time for River Fields and literally no one I know gives a flying fuck. So much wasted time, time that should have gone to Raf’s depression, more Luisa, and definitely more Xo. But NOOOO we had to deal with River’s relationship with her daughter and I’m like... who even gives a damn?

One last thing I’ll say cause I’m too tired to say anymore about this, though I could: where are the magical realism elements in the show? Where has that magical feeling about them gone???????????????

Anyways, let’s see how they wrap it up I guess.

#jane the virgin #in conclusion; i am bitter #Anonymous

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thotantics · 6 years

Text

Broken Hearts Club

⚤ pairing — reader + Oh Sehun (exo)

✎ word count — 6.7k

✦ genre — slight angst, smut, porn WITH a plot

✗ warnings — graphic description of sex, alcohol use, strong language etc

[ A/N ] !!PART TWO COMING SOON!! SO I actually really worked hard on this. I made an outline, wrote a rough draft, edited this sucker and everything. I really hope you enjoy it. :)) (ps idk why I used Seokjin in this? he just felt like such a great crush to have idk sldkxduo) Requested — “Could he make you feel as good as I do?” + “We’re not just friends and you fucking know it”

As you sit in silence on Sehun’s bedroom floor, you look over at him. Tall and handsome, his limbs stretched out on his bed, taking up so much room you briefly wondered how he ever managed to fit a girl in there.

The intrusive thought was followed by a brief line of questions in your mind; what kind of girl he liked, how many different girls he’d had in that bed that seemed way too small for his big frame, and lastly you briefly thought to yourself that Sehun was probably a good fuck.

It’s nothing you hadn’t considered before. He’s gorgeous and he carries himself with this sort of quiet confidence that was definitely intimidating at times. Each movement from him seemed graceful and deliberate, it was easy for anybody to see that Oh Sehun was an attractive man.

Plus, you knew him very well. Having been friends for a couple of years, you had shared so many conversations that lasted late into the night - you knew he was supportive, intelligent, passionate, and that he valued your friendship. So when your brain conjured up a random, fleeting thought about Sehun trying to fit a woman into his bed that seemed too small, and then you thought about sex, your next thought pattern led to you skirting around a confession to your long time friend.

“Sehunnie…” You said carefully, attempting to gain his attention away from his phone. He lifted his eyebrows to acknowledge that he was listening, eyes still on the screen.

“If I tell you something, do you promise not to judge me?”

This caught his attention, and he looked over, sitting up slowly on the edge of the bed so he could focus on you. “Of course.” He replied simply.

Taking a deep breath, you let out the words you’d been holding on to for weeks, “I think I’m in love with Kim Seokjin.”

For a long while, Sehun was unreadable. You had hoped saying it out loud would somehow help you make sense of the way you felt, or figure out what to do about it, but looking at your friend’s unreadable expression you couldn’t help but regret ever having told him this in the first place. Besides, it wasn’t like your friendship together had any sort of basis in sharing these types of things with one another. He had never told you about any girlfriends or crushes or dates. It just wasn’t a topic either of you ever brought up and now that you realized it, you felt a little bit ridiculous for blurting it out.

You were about to apologize, to tell Sehun to forget you ever said anything when he finally spoke up.

“Why him?”

You hesitated, not really quite sure how to answer him. “Um. Well…he’s handsome but it’s…more than that. My heart kind of feels really warm and I get all tingly when I’m near him. That’s what love feels like, I guess. Right?”

Sehun laid back down in his bed and said in a bored tone, “I wouldn’t know,” before he grabbed his phone once more, “You hardly know the guy, though, I do know that.”

“I know him well enough.” You countered, “We’ve hung out.”

“Fine. So you’re in love. When’s the wedding?”

“I don’t appreciate the sarcasm.” You told him with a frown. “I was hoping you’d be supportive.”

“What do you want me to do? I don’t care if you have feelings for Kim Seokjin. Tell Kim Seokjin and let him do something about it. It’s none of my business.” And with that, he lifted his phone back in front of his face.

Clearly the subject made him uncomfortable. You attempted to apologize a bit later, but he dismissed your apology with a kiss to your forehead, a tender sign of affection that a man like Sehun reserved for special women in his life - you’d seen him kiss his mother and grandmother the exact same way, and it warmed your heart.

“Don’t worry about it.” He told you. “It’s just weird to think of you…never mind.”

“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” You told him, “I just trust your opinion and I’ve just been feeling down because of this stupid crush.” There’s a moment of hesitance before you decide it couldn’t hurt to ask, “Do you think he could like me back?”

Sehun sighed heavily, “He’d be an idiot not to.”

A small group of mutual friends were having dinner and you overheard Chanyeol telling Minseok that Sehun had canceled at the last minute.

“What’s wrong? Is he ok?” You asked Chanyeol.

“I’m not sure.” Chanyeol admitted, “I think he’s having dating troubles or something. He’s just been quiet and kind of down lately.” He shrugged, “Whatever it is, you know how he gets when he’s down - he doesn’t open up easily, but he can handle it on his own.”

“Yeah.” You mumbled, “I hope so. I had a horror movie marathon by myself last week...normally Sehun joins me but he didn’t respond to my texts.”

“Next time text me.” Chanyeol nudged you with his elbow. “You never invite me over anymore.”

“Sorry, Channie, I’ve just had a lot on my mind lately.” You sigh.

“Are you coming to Namjoon’s party this weekend?” Chanyeol asked excitedly, “It’ll help take your mind off of things.”

“Actually, yeah.” You nodded, “I’d love to.”

Chanyeol texted you the info to Namjoon’s surprise birthday party later that night, and you found out the party was being thrown by Seokjin at his apartment. Work was stressful for the rest of the week, and in your spare time you started to think the party that weekend would be a good opportunity for you to confess your feelings to Seokjin.

You texted him to let him know you were coming and casually asked if he needed any help setting things up or maybe buying drinks or food. He replied back that he had everything under control, but he was looking forward to seeing you.

With your confidence boosted by his text, you decided to get yourself a really cute new outfit for Namjoon’s party. The night of, you were holed up in your bathroom for a solid two hours getting ready, but by the time you arrived at Jin’s apartment, you looked good, you felt good, and the atmosphere was perfect.

The place was packed with a lot of familiar faces as well as some people you didn’t know. You sought out Namjoon first, gifting him with the present you had gotten him and congratulating him on his birthday. Around you, people were dancing to music, voices were chatting, people were singing and laughing and drinking.

“Here,” Namjoon said, offering you a red plastic cup. “There’s food in the kitchen if you’re hungry. You look great tonight, by the way.”

“Thank you!” You smile, “Wow, Jin really went all out for your party, didn’t he?”

“Yeah, I was so surprised. I thought I’d get maybe a cake and six guys loudly and badly singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to me, I definitely didn’t expect all of this.” Namjoon said with a laugh.

“You deserve all of this and more.” You said, “You’re one of the nicest people I know, Kim Namjoon.”

He blushed, smiling shyly, “Thanks, Y/N.”

“I don’t want to keep you from mingling with your guests,” You said, nodding over his shoulder at someone you didn’t recognize approaching to get his attention, “Happy Birthday again, Joonie.”

“Thanks, Y/N! Have a good night, come and find me if you get hungry, I think I’ll mainly stick to the kitchen.” He laughed, “Taehyung bought the biggest cake I’ve ever seen, it’s like five tiers!”

Laughing, you watch as Namjoon heads to the kitchen with the person who approached him across the room, bragging about the aforementioned cake with big, exaggerated hand gestures. Shaking your head fondly, you turn and briefly scan the faces around you before you head out of the room to look around for the host of the party, the broad-shouldered man who had been running through your mind so frequently for the last few months.

Your stomach is in knots and your head is a little dizzy already, a side effect of your nervous state but the alcohol definitely wasn’t doing you any favors. You finish your first drink and are nursing your second before you find Seokjin. He was out on the balcony with a few others, and you begin to approach him when he spots you and excitedly turns to the person next to him.

“Hey! Babe, I want you to meet my friend!” Seokjin motioned you over, and gestured to the woman on his right. “Y/N, this is my date, Jiwoo, Jiwoo, this is Y/N.”

Your heart sank. Your throat constricted. You reach forward to shake hands with the attractive young woman that Seokjin was proudly introducing you to. “H-hi,” You managed to choke out, “How are you?”

“Hi, I’m fine, and yourself?” She replied, smiling pleasantly at you.

“You two would be really good friends,” Jin told his date before you could stutter out a reply to her. “You remind me of each other.”

Jiwoo smiles sweetly at you, and she chuckles when she speaks to you next but you don’t hear her. Whatever she said made Seokjin laugh and he tucked one arm around her waist. “Ah, really, that’s why Y/N has always been such a good friend, her sense of humor reminds me so much of yours, babe.”

You were spiraling, the alcohol in your bloodstream was probably making this whole situation a lot worse than it actually was, but all you knew for sure was you needed to get out of there, to get away from the two of them, and now. Jiwoo spoke again, teasing Jin and asking if he had a crush on you, but before you could even attempt to try and listen to him respond, you interrupt.

“E-excuse me.” You stuttered, “I-I have to…to…” Unable to form any more coherent words, you rush back inside the apartment. The buzz of the party-goers around you was giving you an instant headache. Tears were welling up in your eyes and your throat was so tight it felt like your breath couldn’t escape your lungs. Your vision seemed to be tunneling, and you worried for a moment that you might actually pass out. Scrambling past the people in your way, you made your way up the stairs and into the farthest bathroom, away from the noise.

You shut the door and immediately slumped over the counter, sobbing so hard your entire frame was shaking. The sorrow made your ribs ache. Seokjin could have liked you, but you were too late. He compared you to his date, and was so enthusiastic for you to meet her. If you had stayed long enough to hear him respond to his date’s joke about having a crush on you, it would have ruined your self-esteem to hear his denial. Or even worse, if he had admitted he had a crush on you and that you really had been too late, you would never forgive yourself. The hurt was piercing you so deeply that you wondered if you could ever be friends with him after this. Your knees weren’t strong enough to hold you, and you sank onto the edge of the tub, burying your face in your hands, and you cried your heart out.

Sehun had only just walked in the front door when he spotted you weaving through the crowd, tears welling your eyes, the expression on your face easy for him to read, but even still he didn’t imagine he would open the bathroom door to find you perched on the edge of the tub, shaking as heavy sobs left your frame. The sound of the door alerted you, and you lifted your head, meeting his gaze. He saw the pain in your eyes, bloodshot and puffy, your makeup smeared all over your face, your hair in tangles.

“What happened?” He asked, shutting the door and dropping to his knees in front of you, “Did someone do this?” You weren’t answering his questions fast enough, sniffling, wiping your cheeks off on your sleeves, “Talk to me.” He encouraged you gently, fear beginning to well up inside of him.

“I was going to confess to Seokjin.” You told him regretfully, “He’s here with someone else. She was teasing him about having a crush on me and I-I just…I had to get out of there.”

For a few moments, Sehun just sat there in front of you, staring up at you while you attempted to wipe your face clean on your brand new clothes, angry you spent money on a confession you never even got to follow through on. After a while, you meet his eyes, feeling vulnerable.

“What?” You ask him quietly.

“You’re really up here hiding away in a bathroom, looking like a complete mess, because you didn’t get to confess a crush to some guy you barely know?” Sehun asks you, and when you stare at him sadly and don’t respond, he pulls away from you, standing and pacing to the other end of the bathroom, “Jesus Christ, you cannot be this stupid?”

Frowning, you tell him defensively, “You don’t have to be so mean about it.”

“Oh, princess, trust me, I’m not being mean. This is not mean. This is me asking you, sincerely, if you’re a fucking idiot or not.” Sehun pointed a finger at you, “I followed you in here because I thought something bad had happened. I thought someone hurt you! I didn’t know you’d be in here throwing a little cry-baby temper tantrum because the boy you like has a new girlfriend.”

“Stop being so mean!” You snap at him, “It hurt my feelings, and you’re making it even worse, ok? So just stop!”

“Aw, are your feelings hurt? Well I’m sorry. But guess what? You hurt me the same way that Kim Seokjin hurt you, but I didn’t run off to the bathroom to hide and cry like a little brat. I still showed up tonight, didn’t I? I was hoping to put it past us. I’m being mature and trying to move on. I was hoping you could see that I’ve gotten over it, that I’m over you, that I-”

“Wait, woah, stop.” You cut him off, holding up your hands, “What the hell are you talking about? You’re over what?”

Sehun scoffs, rolling his eyes, “Yeah, ok.”

“Seriously.” You insist, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, how did I hurt you? It wasn’t on purpose, Sehunnie, you should know that…we’ve been such good friends for so long, I would never intentionally hurt you-”

“We’re not just friends and you fucking know it.” Sehun snaps, this time cutting you off before you could finish. You stare at him with big eyes, sadness still evident in them, and as he looks back at you, he realizes one big mistake that he’d made. You were looking up at him with sadness and tenderness in your watery eyes, realizing only at that moment how you felt was how Sehun had been feeling since you admitted your feelings for Seokjin to him. Everything suddenly made sense - his attitude and his absence since that night, the way he was upset with you now. And you feel like a complete idiot for not having figured all of this out sooner.

“I thought…” You begin, your voice small and cracking a bit, so you clear your throat. “I thought we were best friends.”

“I never wanted to be your friend.” Sehun tells you, “I always wanted to be with you.”

Feeling guilty for assuming the worst, for being bitter and angry thinking that you knew all along of his feelings for you and simply didn’t care about hurting him, Sehun moves to sit on the edge of the tub with you, and he gently takes your hand.

“We are best friends.” He assures you quietly. “I love the time we’ve spent together. I’ve been missing you a lot lately, even though hearing you were in love with someone else was really…hard for me to deal with.”

“I’m sorry for hurting you.” You tell him, fresh tears falling down your face now but these ones weren’t for Kim Seokjin, these ones were for Sehun, and he feels the full weight of each droplet fall heavy on his shoulders.

“I really didn’t know.” You insist between sniffles, “I mean, you never really, like, flirt with me or anything. You’ve never told me how you feel. I’m so sorry, Sehunnie, I feel awful.”

He turns and lifts your shoulders, preventing you from slumping down and crying harder, and he cups your cheeks in both hands, swiping under your eyes tenderly with his thumbs, “Don’t cry.” He tells you, “You’ve done enough of that.”

“But I feel so bad.” You tell him, sniffling and trying hard to fight back your tears as his hands move to tuck your hair behind your ears. “I really am stupid, aren’t I?”

“No, no, no, don’t say that. I shouldn’t have said that...I was just angry. I’m sorry.” He sighs heavily before he continues with a defeated tone, “I didn’t flirt with you. Not because I wasn’t into you, because I was...so, so much. I was just trying to show you that I was interested in more than just hooking up or whatever. Do you think I treated all of my friends the way I do you?”

You shrug your shoulders, “I don’t know, I never really thought about it. I just…enjoyed your company. I never second guessed your actions or your words. I always took everything at face value and…god, Sehun, you should have told me.”

He laughs lightly, easing the tension some, which you’re grateful for. “I wouldn’t stay up all night long talking to Junmyeon on the phone.” He points out, “I don’t let Jongin lay in my lap, I don’t try to braid Chanyeol’s hair.” You laugh at the mental picture all of that conjures, and Sehun smiles sweetly at you. “Ah, you really are a stupid girl, aren’t you?”

You shove his chest lightly, “Give me a break.”

”I have!” Sehun insists , “So many times!” He tosses his hands up exasperatedly, “Other than out right yelling directly in your face that I’m in love with you, I tried everything I could think of to make you feel special to me, because you are.”

At this, you stare at him in awe, nearly on the verge of tears again. Sehun looked vulnerable for the first time since you met him - maybe he hadn’t meant to let that word slip out, but you could tell that he meant it, and even though it made your heart soar, it was breaking, too.

“You love me?” You ask him quietly, unable to form any other coherent words, and he looks down, glancing away from your face nervously.

For a while, he doesn’t answer you, and you were feeling the guilt piling up. It was clear that you had hurt Sehun deeply, obviously much more than this silly, immature encounter with Seokjin had hurt you. You were about to start apologizing all over again when he spoke, under his breath and without looking up at you.

“Do you remember that day I had off last year, when you needed a ride back from the airport? I was exhausted. I had been working hard the whole time you were away, it was my only day off, and I picked you up from the airport and took you to dinner?”

You nod your head, remembering that day very clearly. Sehun had been so tired, physically and mentally, but you hadn’t been back home to Seoul in over a month and the two of you had been so excited to see one another, despite your late arrival, you went out for dinner and stayed up almost the whole night.

“I must have tried to kiss you a hundred times that night.” He recalls with a soft smile, his eyes lifting to meet your own, to gauge your reaction. The regret was clear in your eyes, the subtle, natural pout to your lips was tempting to kiss away, but Sehun held back. Instead, he gently reaches out and strokes your cheek, his thumb lightly trailing down to brush your lips instead, unable to resist the plushness.

“You should have kissed me.” You breathe, wishing more than anything you could somehow turn back time and change things.

“I guess so.” He sighs, his hand dropping from your face and back to his side. “I’m not the kind of man that easily opens up about the way that I feel.” He says, “You know that already.”

“I know.” You murmur sadly.

“What I tried to do, all along, was show you with my actions how I felt. Feel.” He says carefully, “How I…have felt and still feel…about you.”

You gulp, feeling stupid and small that this whole thing was playing out like this. It was your fault, you could see that now. You knew Sehun well enough, after all the time you spent together, that if you had really been paying attention, you would have noticed. Looking back on it now, it’s clear to you how oblivious you had been and how negligent you were of his feelings and the way he treated you.

“I can’t take it back,” You tell him regretfully. “I feel like the worst person in the world because I couldn’t see it, but I can’t change that. I’m sorry.”

For another long moment, you’re both silent, shyly and almost mournfully regarding one another. Neither of you knew what was coming next, but you were certain that Sehun could see your heart pounding in your veins, you were so nervous. Would your friendship be ruined by this? Could you return to normal somehow, or were you expected to find a new normal to adjust to? If so, what did that entail?

All these thoughts were swimming in your head, fueling your anxiety, making you want to cry all over again, but there was only one thought in Sehun’s head in that moment. He was staring directly at your lips, the way they turned down and looked especially full and pouty. He couldn’t stop thinking about kissing you, but he was holding back, afraid he would drive you away.

“You’re the best person I know, Y/N,” Sehun tells you gently, cupping your cheek softly, his heart bursting with warmth when you nuzzle into his touch slightly. “Maybe in the beginning, I was too afraid to make any real moves, I’ll admit it. After some time, I subconsciously was trying not to ruin our friendship. We both made the same mistake. You were too late to confess to Seokjin and I was too late to confess to you.”

“It’s not too late.” You tell him, your chest aching like your ribs were going to open up and offer him your beating heart. “You told me, I know now. It’s not too late.”

He starts to argue with you, but you cut him off, shaking your head, “It took us this long because maybe you were too afraid in the beginning and maybe I was too clueless this whole time, but it’s not too late if I know now. It can’t be...please don’t let it be too late, Sehun, I-I don’t think I could bear it.”

There’s a fire igniting in his belly, and Sehun sees the way you’re looking at his lips, and he doesn’t make the same mistake he made countless times in the span of your friendship - this time, he cups your cheek, his thumb brushes your bottom lip, drawing it down and pressing gently into the softness, and then he leans forward and presses his lips to yours. His kiss is gentle and hesitant, coupled with your trembling hands reaching for his shirt, clinging to the bottom hem desperately. Just the slightest pressure from his lips, no movement, no tongue, but he takes a breath in and it feels like he’s drawing it directly out of your lungs, and you shift forward just a little closer, trying to mold against him.

You part your lips, inviting him to deepen the kiss, but instead Sehun pulls away. He looks down at you with all the love and adoration in the universe shining out from his eyes before he moves back in, his eyes falling shut as he meets your mouth again. This time, he moves. Soft as silk and slow as he can stand. He smooths his lips repeatedly over yours before he finally deepens the kiss, pressing his tongue past your lips.

With his hands gently cradling your face, he tilts your head to the side a little, and you moan into his mouth as you taste the beer from your tongue and the passion on his lips. Your hands, now fisted and twisting the bottom of his shirt, were just about to trail down and feel the smooth skin of his stomach when Sehun pulls away from you again.

He chuckles because you groan in protest, but he still holds onto your shoulders to keep you steady and hold you an arms length away from him. He’s struggling already to catch his breath, but he’s looking at you intently, trying hard to focus.

“You’re drunk.” He states regretfully. “This isn’t the way I wanna do this, Y/N.”

“Sehunnie, I’ve barely had two drinks, and anyway, we’ve already wasted so much time.” You remind him, tugging lightly on his shirt and he gives in easily, letting you press up against his chest again, “Kiss me.”

He indulges you for a moment, pressing his lips firmly to yours in a chaste kiss before he looks down at you, his brow furrowed in concern. “I’m not trying to hook up with you tonight, Y/N. I don’t want that.” For a moment, your heart sinks, and as you stare up at him, nodding softly, you realize he wasn’t finished. His hand comes back to your cheek, cradling your face. “I want to be with you.” He said.

Your face is burning, and you couldn’t have hidden your 1,000-watt smile if you had wanted to, so instead you beam up at Sehun, someone you trusted, admired and you were certain now someone you had loved for a very long time. It was the sort of love that always existed between you, comfortable, never leaving you with questions or doubts. Your friendship had come naturally and, as you stand up on your tiptoes to take the lead and capture his lips, you felt a warmth spreading through your chest as you hoped that the next step of your relationship was starting right now.

Sehun doesn’t pull away from you this time. He lets you kiss him however you want, relishing in the feel of your silken lips and the insistence of your tongue exploring his mouth. You need to map him out, to memorize every detail of his mouth, now. This was someone you had known so intimately for so long, and yet these minute things, like the way his teeth feel bumping into yours or the very slight scruff on his chin rubbing into yours were new, and it filled you with excitement.

He hums into the kiss, the vibration against your lips makes you smile and your eyes flutter open briefly to see he’s looking back at you, and you burst into giggles.

“What?” He laughs, “Is this weird?”

“No! Not at all.” You insist, “It feels…good. It feels really good..”

The smile he gives you is brighter than the sun and warms you up from the inside out. He comes back to kiss you again and you smooth your hands up his chest, laying them flat, feeling his heart pounding under your right palm. It soothes you to know that his heart is racing just as fast as yours.

The distant, faded sounds of the party downstairs are drowned out, muffled by the sound of his heavy breathing as the kiss you share now grows into something more. His hands move from your waist to your back, pressing you more tightly against him than before, and he slips one hand under the hem of your shirt, feeling the warm skin of your lower back. It doesn’t take long before soft sounds were leaving your lips, swallowed up by Sehun’s hungry mouth. He wants to hear you whimper into him more and more, and he keeps pushing further, eventually moving one hand around and gingerly palming your breast through your shirt.

You gasp, arching your back and thrusting your breast into his hand, and in a desperate attempt to feel his skin, you began to claw at his shirt, pulling it upwards and panting against his mouth.

“Take this off.” You breathe raggedly against his lips.

Sehun untangles from you long enough to discard his shirt on the bathroom floor, desperate to press against you with less clothing on, walking you backward until he could lift you and sit you on the counter by the sink. Your legs wrap around his waist and you tug his hair to keep his mouth on yours, even as his hands push up your shirt and he holds you by the ribs, moaning against your tongue as you pulled at his hair lightly.

“Wanna touch you.” Sehun mumbles into the kiss, breaking away from your mouth to catch his breath and look down at you seriously for a second, “I promise I can make you feel good.”

“I know.” You pant, lifting your shirt over your head and tossing it to the side, “I want you to touch me, Sehunnie.”

You thought with nothing but your bra standing in his way, that Sehun would want to go for your tits but instead, he drops to his knees in front of you, so he was staring at the ridiculously skimpy skirt you had bought just for this evening. You felt exposed and just a little bit ridiculous as his hands bunch the material up around your waist, exposing the front of your panties. Blushing hard, you watch as Sehun licks his lips and his eyes flicker back up to meet yours. He was asking for permission with his eyes, gentle and caring. You nod your head, and he looks back down, his hands reaching for your thighs first, rubbing smoothly up and down your soft skin.

“You got all dressed up tonight.” He points out, causing you to blush deeper and hide your face in shame.

“Yeah, I did.” You say, gasping because Sehun chose that moment to run his fingers very delicately down the front of your panties, tracing your slit through the material.

“Did you wear these for him?” He asks you, but his voice is calm and curious. You falter, unsure what he wants you to say. When he looks back up at you, he smirks, “Yeah, of course, you did. You wouldn’t wear sexy panties and a matching bra like this unless you wanted somebody to see it.”

“That’s not true.” You murmur a half-developed argument, “Maybe I wanted to wear it for myself.”

“Don’t lie to me, Y/N. You’re a bad liar.”

You start to say something back, but all thought is wiped from your brain when Sehun pulls the material of your panties to the side and suddenly his fingers are grazing your bare flesh. You twitch, sensitive, and he’s looking at you so carefully that you almost want to hide, it feels so intimate.

“But he didn’t make you wet like this,” Sehun says, parting your lower lips and taking in the sight of your glistening sex. “Who made you this wet?”

“Y…you did.” You stutter, face burning white-hot with embarrassment.

“That’s right.” Sehun smiles up at you, tugging your panties even more firmly to the side, “I did.” and with that, he leans down plant a kiss at the cleft of your pussy, his eyes locked on yours.

You gasp, thighs jerking, and Sehun grips them firmly to keep them spread, and he kisses you again, and again until you aren’t so sensitive anymore. You watch him with your mouth agape, nearly drooling at the sight of his lips on you like this. Then he licks. Gently over your outer labia at first, but then he licks deeper, moaning against you when he tastes the slickness of your arousal pooling against his tongue.

Sehun’s mouth is hot and greedy, licking deep against your hole and flicking insistently against your clit, sucking and swallowing and groaning against you all the while. Your head is spinning and you can’t look away from him. His mouth was intoxicating against yours but to have him between your thighs like this was something far more addictive and something all together cosmic.

You’re already about to cum when he inserts the first finger into you. You buck your hips into his face and feel him smirk, and his eyes focus on yours again and you know that he knows. And then he stops.

You’re about to protest weakly, to accuse him of being a tease when he stands up and his hands move to the button and zipper of his jeans. It shuts you up in a hurry and you sit there, legs spread, cunt dripping, and watch with your mouth practically watering as he pulls out his thick, heavy cock. Sehun strokes himself a couple of times as he looks you over.

“God, Y/N, you’re so beautiful. Do you want me to fuck you?”

Nodding eagerly, you swallow past a lump in your throat, forcing yourself to make eye contact with him. “Yes, Sehunnie, please.”

“Scoot a little closer to the edge.” He tells you, gripping your thighs and tugging you slightly to aid in your movements. He steps between your thighs and then reaches into his pocket for a condom before he shoves his jeans off the rest of the way so they don’t inhibit his movement. You trace his abs lightly with curious fingers as he rolls the condom down the length of his erection, and he tells you in a low whisper, “I’ve wanted this for so long, Y/N.”

You feel compelled to tell him that you’re sorry yet again, but he kisses the words from your lips and without wasting any more time, pushes himself inside of you. Sehun groans with you when he’s inside, and he thrusts in deeper, bottoming out while you gasp and cling onto him. Your legs wrap around his waist and your arms around his shoulders, and Sehun kisses you slowly and keeps himself still, letting you adjust. You feel impossibly tight, clenching around his cock and trembling. When he does start moving, he pulls back from your mouth and looks down between you at where you’re joined. He’s already coated in your arousal, sticky and wet with each plunge back inside your depths, and even though he hasn’t had a single drink tonight, he feels drunk on the sight alone.

“Fuck.” He hisses, squeezing tightly your waist and drawing you further off of the counter. He’s practically holding your weight on his own now, only using the counter to balance himself, and he’s slamming into you deeply. “Fuck!”

Shaking and moaning uncontrollably, you’re on the edge of orgasm again and you begin to claw at Sehun’s back and shoulders, trying to keep him pressed tightly to you while your hips roll to gain friction on your clit. It’s only been a couple of minutes and Sehun can feel when you start to cum around him, your inner walls rhythmically squeezing and pulsing around his cock, and he feels victorious.

“Could he make you feel as good as I do?” He asks as you cry out at the peak of your pleasure. “Could he fuck you so good you cum for him in two minutes flat?” Sehun asks, his thumb finding your clit despite your orgasm beginning to slow, driving it right back up to another peak, “Look at you.” He says, voice thick with adoration and amazement, “You’re soaking my cock, you’re cumming all over me. Fuck, you’re so good.”

“Oh, my god, don’t stop..” You cry out, tears spilling down your face as one orgasm leads directly into another and your whole body is trembling under Sehun’s.

“I’m not gonna stop.” He grunts, fucking you through your orgasm and continuing on, pounding you rough and fast, “I want to be with you, Y/N,” He groans, “I want to fuck you like this all the time. Always.”

“Always.” You echo back automatically, head thrown back, eyes watering and vision blurry. “I love you, Sehunnie. Oh, god…I love you so much.”

Sehun meant to draw it out a little bit longer, he meant to see if he could make you cum a third time, but as the words left your lips in the throes of passion, his hips stuttered against you and his cock throbbed and released, spilling himself inside the condom. Your tryst had lasted all of ten minutes, and he maybe would have been disappointed if he had been with anybody else, but he was with you, and when he stilled and looked down at you, you were grinning up at him, satisfied, your makeup smeared and your hair a mess, and Sehun was happier than he could remember being in his life.

He’s apologetic as he helps you get off the bathroom counter. Shy as he hands you a wad of toilet paper and turns away to give you privacy to clean up while he removes the condom. “I’m sorry if I was too rough.”

“You weren’t too rough.” You assure him, “It felt amazing. I loved every second of it.”

He winces a little at your choice of words, “Shit. I’m sorry it was so quick…next time I’ll be more thorough and I’ll take my time. I mean, if you want there to be a next time. We don’t have to.”

You laugh, coming up behind him as he stuffs himself back in his jeans and closes the zipper. You hug him from the back, pressing a kiss between his shoulderblades, “It was perfect, Sehunnie. And of course, I want there to be a next time. I meant it when I said I love you, you know?”

“You don’t love me.” He chuckles, turning to face you. “All this time I’ve been in love with you, you never noticed.”

“I didn’t notice because I thought what we had was special and different than any other friendship. Regardless, of course, I love you. I love you for being supportive of me, for being there for me when I needed you, I love you for coming after me tonight to check on me, for caring about me, for being concerned for me, even though I hurt you. I love you for coming over to watch scary movies and eat junk food when we’re bored.” You laugh, and he smiles back at you. “I just didn’t realize what kind of love this was as I was feeling it. Not until now.”

“What kind is it?” He asks you curiously.

“Not the kind where you have a stupid crush and it makes your heart flutter and you end up crying in the bathroom at some party. My love for you is comfortable and easy, and I’ve never doubted it or second-guessed it because I always felt it so strongly. I’m sorry that I didn’t question it, though... I should have analyzed our feelings sooner. I should have paid closer attention. But I’m not sorry at the same time, because our bond is very strong and for that, I’m thankful. Thank you for sticking around, Sehun.”

His chest is swelling with pride and affection as he looks down at you. There’s a lot more he wants to say and a lot more he wants to ask, but for now, he feels at peace. Sehun presses a kiss to your forehead and slips his arm around your shoulders, and he leads you out of the bathroom.

As you walk together down the short hallway to the stairs, he mutters under his breath against your ear, “Let’s literally never tell Seokjin that we hooked up in his guest bathroom.”

#oh sehun #exo #sehun smut #sehun oneshot #mine #LISTEN....editing is rly hard for me so pls forgive any mistakes #i read through this so many times and tried to fix any errors I saw #maybe i need a beta reader or editor sdlfkjosie nah i'm too nervous #i'll just continue posting things until I Get Good #i'm happy with the practice i've had the last few weeks and the progress i've made already #this is my favorite oneshot so far

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broken-endings · 7 years

Text

theresa predicts attack on titan ?/?

Okay, catching up with Shingeki no Kyojin starting with chapter 87-88

might as well make this all the way through chp 92

i apologize in advance for my SERIOUS inconsistency with capitalizing proper nouns. Everything written here is me experiencing the story in real time, stream of consciousness, stopping to write and reading some more. i hope it's at least a little coherent. there’s some good theories and conjectures in here

MANGA SPOILERS

tl;dr i have a MOTHER UPON MOTHER of theories that’s at the very end of this post that I thought of while formatting all this text.

seeing the owl's titan form, and i'm just like "it looks like eren's"

then when the man was coming out of the nape i was like "he looks like grisha"

or "he looks like EREN"

man, i don't even know how that would work but what if eren was the OWL and is older than grisha or something.

though owl guy DOES have lighter hair, but other than that i'm like "damn man"

AND LITERALLY THE NEXT PAGE THE GUY SAYS HIS NAME IS EREN WHAT IS HAPPENING

and damn man, why does old eren look so much like erwin with darker hair too? i mean i suppose everyone being eldian in the walls, they're all at least distantly related. but like what if in some weird twist of all this erwin was eren's son or something???

~~~

alright i've got some better sense of all this after the information settled and i read on

I know our eren is not "that eren" or he didn't ever start out being that owl eren he’s only both erens after he gained the coordinate

because grisha ate owl eren and eren ate grisha, he's become both of them, and the first king. Just like Armin has Bertholdt in him, eren has both of them in him. and grisha must have, out of honor and respect, and maybe a reminder of his mission, named his son after the owl.

but there's STILL something bothering me about all this. before eren ever got truly involved in this, no titan power or anything, in the first chapter he had that dream of mikasa with shorter hair

like that's still the oddball of all the details we know. how do you dream about the future?? so far everything has been about memory and the past.

and the fact that the scene where eren woke up dreaming grisha's flashback and said almost the exact same thing he said in chapter one. "this feeling i was dreaming for a very long time" and he was crying after both too.

just WHAT IS THIS ALLUDING TO??

~~~

one other possibility i wonder is. if a person inherited titan powers by eating someone has a child, can any aspect of that eaten person be inherited through blood? Like memories for example.

Because grisha's blood would've had first eren's blood, which went on to run in second eren's veins

but owl eren wouldn't have just had his own memories, he'd have had all the ones who had his power before him, and have given them all to grisha.

so maybe without eating anyone, our eren had some kind of memories from birth? IF this is true it would COMPLETELY explain his ability to kill grown men as a young child and also fool them in order to gain an upperhand. he mercilessly stabbed them to save mikasa, and encouraged her to do the same.

even if that is true then that still doesn't explain the "future" dream thing from chapter 1.

i'm writing all this before grisha has even eaten owl eren. i'm assuming nothing unexpected happens. but maybe i better continue reading.

~~~~

whomever inherits the power of the nine titans WILL DIE IN THIRTEEN YEARS (why thirteen. that’s awfully...specific. nine titans, thirteen years...idk where this is leading)

barring a miracle eren won't reach his 24th? birthday? armin will but will barely reach his 28th birthday. UGH this sucks.

and OH MY GOSH THAT’S why grisha did it when he did. eren was 10? when grisha gave him the power, wasn't he?? if we consider that it probably took a couple years between coming to paradise and the birth of his son... ...grisha was literally out of time. that's why he left to get the coordinate. he couldn't have known the marley controlled titans would attack in that time. When he left to get it he never thought he'd have to involve his son, but between the wall falling and the 13 year time limit, even though he finally got the coordinate, if he wanted to save his people, his son, he had to give eren the power.

i know i'm missing some kind of detail that makes it "have to be eren" cuz grisha wasn't royal blood, his first wife was and his son with her was. But he did know eren's disposition. His hardcore determination to see the outside world, join the scouts and kill titans. It wasn't like eren was his only option, but he was his best option with what little time he had left.

~~~~~~~

chp 89

it only just occurred to me seeing levi say it:

there are nine titans nine scouts remain from reclaiming wall maria and 2 of them are titans

maybe it's just for story symmetry and nothing else but it feels ominous just realizing that eren, armin, mikasa, levi, hanji, jean, sasha, connie, and...the one guy whose name i don't know, but almost saved erwin? though he might be a red shirt.

~~~

WHAAAAAAAAT?????

old eren instructing grisha mentions mikasa and armin whom he DOESNT KNOW who they are or whose memories they are from when grisha asks

WHAT MUST GRISHA have thought when his son befriended mikasa and armin. though grisha knew mikasa before eren did.

WHAT THE HELL DOES ALL THIS MEAN why does old eren know future things???? why has current eren seen personal future things????

my mind is so oversaturated with new information. I haven't read this many chapters in a row since I finished the anime and caught up to the current chapter which was right around eren and historia being abducted.

~~~

all this stuff and we still don't entirely know the mystery surrounding the ackerman family and how it fits in the outside world.

~~~

so eren could use the coordinate because he was touching a member of the royal family when he did whatever needed to be done to activate it: dina, his dad's first wife and the titan who ate his mom.

so then, doesn't that mean he doesn't have to eat a royal family member but merely have one by his side aka historia, like skin contact for something

i can't see historia remaining the motionless figurehead inside the walls for the rest of the story. She would want to fight and DO something. this is something she could do

~~~

they mentioned "magic" for the first time: grisha to owl!eren. which feels really out of place after 80+ chapters. which is ironic since what about normal humans growing into giant titans doesn't scream magic? i guess the word magic has connotations tightly bound to traditional fairy tales and witches and wizards and wands and spells. in other genres it's usually called something else: bending, mutation, etc.

~~~

and this thing about all the eldian people being connected by an invisible thread which is how the coordinate controls the titans. i wonder if that kind of information could lead to de-titanizing people without them having to eat anyone.

I wonder if the connections between the people, the invisible threads, could transcend time? Since they already transcend space when it comes to the coordinate.

If the connections CAN transcend time then that could mean owl eren could have experienced eren-who-wasn't-born-yet's memories because in the future their memories possess the same body in our present day eren.

bertholdt had a better handle on armin's strategy than anyone and armin was the one who would eat bertholdt. could it be he was tapping into "future" memories of being armin?

and if they can tap into "future" memories that would also imply there is fate in this world. Since before grisha knew he'd have a son, the owl had eren's memories cuz, no matter what, grisha was going to eat the owl and eren was going to eat grisha. If that was a changeable outcome then the "future memory" wouldn't be there

and if fate exists

maybe there's a prophesy associated with titans.

OH OH OH

but if fate exists then choice is meaningless. This whole time has been about making a choice because you don't know what the future holds.

i never thought that that could mean anything other than being a lesson and wise words, but there's still "future related things" we don't know about. the owl knowing mikasa and armin. eren seeing his own future, in an older mikasa.

what would it mean if isayama makes this a fate driven world? I suppose it'd enforce "there's no way of knowing which is the right or better choice"

but it'd also mean that the choice you make would have always been the only way things could turn out. but i guess that could be nice. there'd be none of this "if only you'd chosen the other thing" in all these situations and "you made the wrong choice" it'd enforce that there is no right or wrong choice, there is just the choice that happens, and it can't be changed or rewritten, like the king did with people's memories.

would it make the characters feel worse if they learn they're controlled by fate and their choices don't matter?

or even if they are controlled by fate, who knows, maybe there's an even more outer layer of this story onion and beyond eldians and marley, fate is in charge, and they have to ultimately "escape predestined fate" beyond the conflict with marley.

though if fate is escapable that'd also imply someone or something tangible is controlling everything we've seen so far. isayama wouldn't do that would he? he rendered the war against the titans moot by revealing what's outside the walls, would he render the conflict outside the walls moot by putting something greater?

it all depends on how long this manga is gonna be. cuz damn if that ended up being true it'd have to probably be 150-175 chapters long.

~~~

i doubt the fate thing but it’s cool to imagine. The thing with war and history repeating itself is a theme through the manga and “who’s the real enemy” could actually be “ourselves.” Because no matter how much you learn you’re never as free as you want to be, and you make someone an enemy cuz you need someone to fight other than yourself. And you rewrite history to control others and see things your way because history is what you write, not necessarily what happened. That’s actually pretty profound, and part of why i like this story so much

~~~

EREN HAS LONG HAIR LOOOONGGG HAIR

and they finally see the ocean that is the ONE wish i had for the trio to see the ocean but now any fuckery could happen cuz they won a battle but not the war.

a YEAR

the time skips just take me by surprise. they're all sixteen, some seventeen or almost seventeen.

WHAT HAS ZEKE been doing all this time??? REINER?? maybe Marley imprisoned them for failure?

Ymir??

~~~~

i seriously can't wait for this, but i'm assuming at some point we may see a flashback of what began the conflict between marley and the eldians

we briefly heard what i think may be the true history from the owl about how ymir got the power. i hope we get more information.

~~~

whoa whoa whoa

time is flying.

when the eldians say they've been fighting for four years

that doesn't mean another timeskip does it?? cuz reiner has FACIAL HAIR

though i think he was an older recruit maybe 16 or 17 when they graduated. (do we know his age?). then a year kind of passed between then and the retaking of wall maria. and we had a year time skip after that, so he could be 18/19 which i guess facial hair is allowed, but it makes him seem much older and i'm like "shit, is he in his twenties or something??" it can't be

~~~

is this gabi gonna be a foil for eren. a young girl on the enemy's side despite being blood related will see everyone that's her enemy be destroyed.

that's eren when this story started. cuz the titans are related to him by blood, but he didn't know that. and he wanted to see them all destroyed.

she even looks like eren, is drawn like him

IT WAS A TIME SKIP

that marley general says when they tried to take back the original titan power NINE YEARS AGO

what's been happening on paradise island the last FOUR years

or maybe i should say three years. this conflict could've started during the first year time skip we saw. but so eren and them should be 19ish, reiner would be 20/21

and annie, in that stone would she age? or would she stay the same? frozen in time. but her times almost up just like reiner's right?

~~~~~~~~~

and while EDITING and formatting in the text box cuz copy and paste didn’t work.

I THOUGHT OF A BRILLIANT UPON BRILLIANT THEORY THAT BRINGS EVERYTHING TOGETHER

So we know everyone is “descended from Ymir who got the power of the titans. She split her power into nine parts. blahblahblah”

Something that was once whole was split into pieces from one being. everyone is connected via “invisible thread” and the original titan power controls all the titans because THEY WERE ALL MEANT TO BE WHOLE. They are literally mere pieces of something larger.

They are shards of something that was once a whole being, and are trying to return to that. If one of the titans were to consume the other 8 powers, then they’d be closer to whole again

mindless titans are like echoes of the original because they’re made from fluids of a true titan’s body. So they eat people because they’re trying to become whole again, an instinctual nature to eat someone who’s a real titan so they can be part of that whole again that is titan ymir.

to return to being whole, the theoretical titan who gains all the titans’ abilities would also need to consume all the mindless titans because they literally possess part of that whole, running through their bodies, the fluid that was taken. I don’t think that WILL happen. But many parts of this puzzle WANT that to happen. I think that’s possibly the only reason mindless titans eat people. to become whole again.

but all this begs the question

the walls are FULL of colossal titans. are they mindless titans too? how are they so big? and if they’re NOT mindless titans then WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?? there’s only nine titan powers, one being colossal. STILL LOTS OF IMPORTANT INFORMATION MISSING

~~~

i caught up on attack on titan and my head hurts. should try not to miss six chapters in a row. it’s a fuck ton

#attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #eren jaeger #hajime isayama #eren kruger #theresa predicts #my commentary

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