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#i'm excited to keep learning and creating stuff
sukinapan · 8 months
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feeling happy with the now 6 little games i've made on my own over the past 3 years :)
sometimes i get sad that i'm not the kind to journal or take many photos of my life, but when i look at these games i can remember exactly what was going on and what i was feeling at the time i was making them, so they are little pieces of my life too.
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punkitt-is-here · 8 months
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LIFE UPDATE!!!! RAGHHH!!!
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Okay, so, as some of y'all know, I was fired from my job a couple of months ago. I reapplied, and unfortunately, despite getting an interview, I was turned down. Because of that, I'm going full-time as a self-employed artist. This means I'll be focusing on making fun stuff for my shop, learning better how to ship out items, and doubling down on doing more commissions.
As some of my wonderful commissioners know, I struggle a lot with deadlines and motivation. I have ADHD and even though I'm medicated, it still often gets in my way and kicks my ass often. It's part of why I have such a big struggle when doing commissions; they're hard to motivate myself to do and sometimes require a lot of communication back and forth that I'm just not the best at right now. I would like to say thanks to everyone that's put up with my inability to figure out a decent schedule for commission work, and hopefully everyone who's tried to get art from me will get their stuff very soon!
SO, uh, now that I don't really have a job, what's that mean? Well, I'm going to set a goal to actually make good on my promises for commissionwork. I tend to actually get a lot done in bursts, but they come and go, so I'm going to try and do weekly commissions but with much smaller slots. What I'll be doing is upping the frequency while also limiting the amount I get per-week so I can have a form of consistency with my output. That way, both parties are satisfied and I don't have to keep beating myself up for taking my time because I kept convincing myself I had a big-ass workload I couldn't chip away at.
Part of how I'll be doing this is acting like I still have a job. I'm gonna set aside work hours in the week to specifically work on commissions and shipping and interfacing with clients. I depend on the kindness and goodwill of my incredible followers, so the last thing I really want to do is tarnish that (at least any more than I have; apologies to everyone who's put up with me learning how to run a shop!). I think I'm at a point where I understand a lot of my limitations and abilities, and so I hope going forward I can begin to create a routine for myself and be able to make this something I can do far into the future! If you'd like to support me while I do this wacky lil thing, i've got a ko-fi and now a Patreon! (which I will link in my reblog since I heard Patreon links are weird here on tumblr.) I'm really excited to be launching a patreon. I can't guarantee any specific type of content, but the plan is just to show tiny little previews of stuff early if you're a supporter and stuff like this. I've never had anything of this kind, so I ask for your patience as I work stuff out, but if you feel like supporting me on either platform it'd mean the world to me. Thanks :)
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https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMMAb4KUo/
Smut w biker Ethan Landry ?!
Hi💕 I hope you like it! I got out of the hang of writing over the last few days so I might go back and make a few changes once i re-read over this at some point lmao
Roll Up - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader
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This Contains SMUT - Minors DNI
Summary: Your boyfriend's new hobby scares you, but he shows you it isn't that bad.
Contains: Oral(f receiving), p in v, rough-ish sex.
A/N: We're going to pretend that this isn't based off of the photoshopped pics of Jack lmao. If this sucks, don't let me know. I'm sensitive👉👈
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When your boyfriend mentioned getting his motorcycle license, you thought he was crazy. You even created a power point presentation, showing him how dumb of an idea it was. He just rolled his eyes every time you made a good point, because he knew it was what he was going to do regardless.
“You aren’t going to break up with me if I get a bike, are you?” he asked, putting on his shoes as he got ready to go take the driving test. “I think it’d be a lot of fun to have one.”
“It’d take a lot more for me to break up with you…but what if something happens to you? I’d just be worried the whole time you were out,” you sighed, getting a little anxious.
You heard a knock on the door, as Ethan walked away from you to answer it. You took a deep breath when Chad walked in, carrying his extra helmet for Ethan.
“Why’d you have to corrupt my sweet boyfriend?” you asked, as Chad smiled at you.
“I think you’ll like it…Tara does,” he said, smirking at Ethan as he handed him the helmet.
“Yeah, what if I get one and you can’t keep your hands off me?” Ethan asked, cocking his eyebrow as he looked at you. “I like the sound of that.”
“Yeah, and I’d not like to hear the sound of your eulogy being spoken,” you said, as Ethan scoffed.
“You’re so overdramatic,” he said, walking over to kiss you. He placed a kiss to the tip of your nose, your lips, and your forehead before he pulled away. “I love you, baby. Wish me luck.”
“I love you, too,” you said, as both boys walked to the door. Ethan stood in the doorway for a minute, waiting for you to hear the other thing he needed you to say. “Fuck it, fine. Good luck. Please, just be careful.”
“I will, babe,” he said, chuckling as he walked out.
One thing about Ethan was that the second he got an idea in his head, you knew he was going to stop at nothing to get what he wanted. This was by far the scariest thing he’d ever wanted to do, and you’d done nothing but panic whenever you thought about it.
It all started when Chad brought Ethan to his friend’s garage, and they were talking about Chad getting his license. At first you laughed it off, thinking it was about Ethan wanting to have more in common with his best friend, but once you saw him browsing for bikes online, you realized how serious he was about it.
Once he got his learners, he started to spend more time with Chad and his friend. He’d lay in bed with you until you fell asleep, then sneak out of the bed once he’d get the text from Chad that he was outside. You hated it when you’d roll over and he wasn’t beside you, but you wanted him to practice when there were a lot less cars on the road.
He was always in the best mood when he’d come back home, still feeling the adrenaline. He tried to be quiet when he snuck back in, but you always woke up. You’d jump out of bed once you heard the shower cut on, strip off your clothes, and join him in the steamy bathroom. He’d tell you all the things he did and new stuff he learned as you sleepily listened, but it always ended in the hottest shower sex you’d ever had.
You kept checking the time on your phone, wondering what was taking Ethan so long to get back home. It’d been a few hours, and you were trying to prepare yourself. As worried as you were for him to get his license, you knew you’d be excited for him. But the possibility of him not getting it worried you more than if he did. You knew how much he wanted it, and you knew he’d be upset if he didn’t get it.
Once you saw Ethan’s name and picture flash across your phone screen, you quickly answered the call.
“Hey, babe,” you said, “How’d it go?”
You heard traffic passing him and sirens off in the distance.
“Come outside, I want to show you something.” You could hear the happiness in his voice, and you kind of had a hunch about what your boyfriend had done. Once you made your way down the stairs of your apartment complex and saw him standing there, a helmet under his arm and the matte black bike behind him, you didn’t know how to feel.
“I guess you passed,” you said, your eyes squinting as the early afternoon sunlight hit them just right. “I’m proud of you, baby.”
“I can still tell you’re mad,” he teased, as he leaned down to kiss you. “but thank you.”
“This is yours, isn’t it?” you asked, as he tried to fight off the excited smile.
“Yeah, I hope you don’t hate me because I didn’t talk to you about it first,” he said, reaching around and grabbing the extra helmet off the bike seat. “I want you to go on a ride with me.”
“Absolutely not,” you said, his smile dropping at your words. “Not right now, can we go out later tonight? I’m a little scared and I’d feel better if I didn’t feel like we were going to get hit.”
“Of course,” he said, his smile appearing on his lips again. “I think you’ll love it.”
“Whatever you say,” you said, as he grabbed your hand and led you inside.
As it got darker outside, Ethan got more excited. He knew how close he was to taking you out to see what made him almost as happy as you do. As much as you were freaking out, you knew he’d never put you in danger, and you really wanted to know what the big deal was.
“Okay,” Ethan said, as you slipped your hoodie over your head. “Just a few quick things…I know it’s a little scary, but you need to lean into any turns we take. Don’t ever let go of me and sit as close to me as you can.”
“If we lean, won’t you lose control?” you questioned, as he shook his head.
“We’re not doing anything crazy so don’t think I’m going to take you on any super curvy roads…but if you stay upright when we need to lean, that could cause me to lose control.”
“Okay,” you sighed, as he handed you the helmet.
He looked you over to make sure nothing on you was loose fitting and made sure your helmet was good before he slung his leg over the bike.
“You coming?” he asked, his hand reaching out to help you on.
“There’s not a lot of room back here,” you said, as he slid his helmet over his head.
“I already told you, just hold on to me, and stay as close as you can. I won’t let anything happen to you,” he said, his words a little muffled. “You ready?”
“Yeah,” you said, as he started the bike. Your arms tightly wrapped around him, his hand rubbing against your thigh to let you know he had you before he pulled off.
He took you on a few of the streets he first learned how to drive on, not wanting to freak you out too much. Once you came to a stop light, he started to yell over the hum of the bike.
“You okay?” he asked, his hand moving to rub against your thigh again.
“Yeah, you aren’t going very fast, though,” you yelled back, as he started to laugh to himself.
“You want me to go faster?” he asked, “I just didn’t want to scare you.”
“You can go faster, just don’t kill us,” you said, as the light turned green.
He revved the engine before he sped off, going significantly faster than he did before. You didn’t feel scared though, you were…turned on? You weren’t sure if it was the vibrations coming from the bike, or how hot your boyfriend was at that moment, but you knew you were going to jump him as soon as the two of you got back home.
He started to drive out of the city, taking you to one of the back roads he’d always pull off at with his friends. He stopped in the gravel area and helped you off the bike before he got off.
“Was that too much?” he asked, pulling the helmet off of his head. You quickly pulled yours off, mumbling a “No” as you stood on your tippy toes to kiss him. Your hands went up to his curls as his tongue brushed against your bottom lip to deepen the kiss. You stood there making out, the only light coming from the full moon and the glow of the headlights.
“We need to go home soon,” you said against his lips, “I understand why you always want sex after your late-night rides.”
“We’ll head home soon babe,” he said, his hand reaching down to squeeze your ass as he pulled you closer. “Or…we could do it right here.”
“I know this is a back road, but someone could still see us,” you said, glancing at the road for any other cars off in the distance.
“So what?” he asked, as his lips moved to your neck.
He pulled away once he heard the familiar loud hum heading up the road, slowing down a little once it got closer to where you and Ethan were.
“Is that Chad?” you asked, as Ethan nodded.
“Tara’s with him,” he said, noticing her tiny frame tightly clinging to him. “Good think I didn’t get you naked yet,” he laughed a little, thinking about how awkward that would’ve been.
“You know how I am when I want sex and I don’t get it,” you said, giving him a warning look. “Please don’t get caught up in talking for too long.”
“I won’t, babe,” he said, as Chad pulled in and took his helmet off.
“She didn’t kill you!” Chad yelled, as you rolled your eyes.
Ethan walked up to him as you walked over to Tara. She had the biggest smile on her face when she saw you standing there.
“Ahh! We can go on late night rides together, now!” she said, pulling you into a hug. “Isn’t this fun?”
“Yeah, I thought it was going to be scary,” you said, glancing over to Ethan to see him smiling at you. “Now I just have to convince him to take me home soon.”
“I get it, I feel the same way,” she said, picking up on your suggestiveness.
When Ethan walked around to you, he looked a little nervous as Chad motioned for Tara to get back on the bike.
“I hope you don’t mind, but Chad wants to ride around for a little bit. There’s this straight, flat road near here that we like to go way faster than we should, but if you’d rather go home, we can.”
“As long as we go home soon, I’m fine with it,” you said, as Ethan started to smile.
“Put your helmet back on,” he said, walking you back over to his bike.
He slid his over his head and helped you get on the back before he started it again and took off. You got a little confused once you hit a certain point in the road. Chad and Ethan both came to a stop on opposite sides, as you felt his hand grip your thigh.
“Do you trust me?” he asked, the question making you nervous as Chad gave him a thumbs up.
“Yeah,” you yelled, as he said, “Hold on tight.”
He revved the engine again before taking off, going way faster than he’d gone before, at least while you were on the back. The way you were rested against Ethan made it easy for you to see that Chad was keeping pace with him before he dropped a gear and flew past Ethan. Ethan did the same, your grip on him getting even tighter as you felt the adrenaline coursing through your veins. He quickly caught back up to Chad and passed him before he started to slow down a little.
“You okay, baby?” he asked, once he came to a stop and your grip on him relaxed.
“If you don’t take me home and fuck me, I’m not going to be okay,” you said, as Chad pulled up beside you and pulled his helmet off.
“Fuck, that thing’s fast,” he said, as Ethan pulled his helmet off.
“Yeah, I didn’t expect it. We were going over a hundred,” Ethan said, your eyes going wide as you listened to him speak. “I’m going to take her home.”
“You coming back out later?” Chad asked, as Ethan shook his head.
“No, I have other plans,” he said, as Chad nodded.
“You guys have fun. Don’t be an idiot,” Chad said, putting his helmet back on before speeding off.
“Over a hundred?!” you yelled, as Ethan started to laugh.
“Yeah, and I wasn’t going as fast as I could’ve,” he said, putting his helmet back on. “Let’s get you home.”
As soon as he got you home, you both were so needy. Various clothing items were scattered across your apartment, from the front door to the bedroom you shared with Ethan. He wasted no time, burying his head in between your thighs as soon as he pushed you back on your bed. Your fingers ran through his curls as soft moans slipped past your lips. His hands were kneading at your thighs as his tongue swirled around your sensitive clit.
“Use your fingers, babe,” you gasped out, as he suckled on your clit. He did what you said, sliding two of his fingers into your soaked, dripping pussy with ease. “Fuck, just like that.”
“Did being on the back of my bike turn you on that much?” he asked, his eyes boring into yours as he curved his fingers to brush against that spongy spot inside of you. “Yes,” you said, letting out a low moan. “You were just so fucking hot.”
His mouth went back to your clit as you tugged at his curls, the sounds of him fucking you with his fingers and your moans filling the room. His free hand was roaming your body, from your thighs up to your breasts. Once he started to pinch one of your nipples, you felt that familiar feeling starting to build inside of you.
Ethan knew you were close. Your legs were starting to shake as his fingers moved against your g-spot faster. He sucked your clit into his mouth, hard. Your back arched up off the bed as you pulled his hair so hard that it hurt. He didn’t let up though.
You let out a whimper as the feeling washed over you, your pussy fluttering around his fingers. He gently lapped at your clit until you started to come down from your high.
The grip you had on his hair relaxed as he sat up to look at you, his mouth coated in your arousal.
“Do I still have hair?” he asked, running his fingers through his curls. His scalp was so sensitive that he winced when he touched it.
“I’m sorry, baby,” you mumbled, as your breathing started to get a little more regular.
“It’s worth it if I made you cum that hard,” he said, smiling at you. “I loved having you on the back of my bike. It’s like you weren’t scared at all.”
“I wasn’t. I trust you.”
As much as Ethan loved watching your face when he fucked you, he wanted to be as deep as he could inside your warm, wet pussy. He positioned you so your ass was sticking up in the air for him as the side of your face rested against the cool comforter.
“So fucking perfect,” he said, rubbing the tip of his cock over your wet folds. “You ready, baby?”
“Yes,” you said, as he started to inch himself inside of you. The slight burning feeling as he stretched you out made you gasp, his hand roaming over your lower back as his hip bones met the curve of your ass.
He started out with slow thrusts, still giving you time to adjust. Once you whined out to let him know you wanted more, he moved faster. You heard the soft slapping of his skin against yours as the head of his cock hit that special spot inside of you. You glanced back to see him watching his cock disappear inside your pussy, slide himself out, head and all, before he started to pound into you.
“Fuck,” you whimpered, your eyes still on him as your hands grabbed at the sheets.
He looked up to watch your body as you started to roll your hips back, meeting his thrusts. His cheeks were red as his mouth hung open, a few of his curls sticking to his forehead. One of his hands tightly held your hip as his other hand reached around brushing against your lower stomach. You soon felt two of his fingers strumming against your clit, your moans getting louder by the second.
“Harder,” you whimpered, a smirk playing on his lips as he started to mercilessly pound into your pussy.  
 “That’s it, baby. You take it so fucking well,” he said, some of his words getting broken by the random grunts slipping past his lips.
Once he put the right amount of pressure on your clit and started to roll his fingers in circles, you felt your body start to tense up, your orgasm sneaking up on you. You were a whimpering mess as the slapping sounds got louder, echoing off the walls. He was getting close, but he was trying so hard to fight it.
He watched your fists ball up in the fitted sheet, pulling it lose as you cried out. Your pussy was squeezing him so tight that his thrusts started to falter.
“Where do you want it?” he rushed out, but you couldn’t form words, completely fucked out.
He slid out of you, releasing his hot cum all over your ass and lower back. His hand ran through his sweaty hair before he flopped down on the bed beside you. Your hips started to relax as you eased the lower half of your body to lay flat across the bed.
“Jesus,” he sighed, catching his breath. “That was amazing.”
“Was it as good as the shower sex?” you asked, smiling as you turned your head to face him.
“Well, we do still need to shower…”
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astrologanize · 2 months
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◉ pick a card : how you can make the best of your 2024
*please take a moment to take a deep breath and choose the image you are !most! drawn towards*
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----------for pile 1 ⊹
there is a search for substance in your life, you want something real, something meaningful, and you're not doing anything to create it for yourself. you're secretly, or not so secretly, hoping and wishing and expecting for things to somehow fall into place one day. you keep yourself open to the universe, you keep yourself open to interpretation, and you are so open that you are structureless! how can the universe deliver whatever you're desiring when you don't know what that is? or even who you are!
unfortunately the key to it all isn't going to fall into your lap - you must sort through the emotional gunk that's residing within your inner tank and decipher what it is you want to be, what your values are, what matters to you, so that you can hand-pick the life that you want by having these standards in place. it's easier to take risks and to change your life once you have assurance in yourself and this can only happen when you know what you are vs what you aren't, what you like vs what you don't, etc.
gotta work hard to play hard too! "ugh i just want to travel and have a good time" okay but where are the funds coming from? do you know how to budget? do you know how to set up a trip? do you know how to procure the necessary steps in order to make the shit you want happen? to make the best of your 2024 you need to sort through your gunk and get choosier about your life; in doing so you're going to find your connections with others changing, you're going to understand where you've been lacking integrity, where you have been naive, what's worth adjusting for, what you need to attend to more, and once you have the framework built for yourself you're going to see how exciting life can be. no more waiting for life!
----------for pile 2 ⊹
so i see y'all like to throw everything at the wall until something sticks perchance...well, i mean, i guess you're trying at least? though that is better than doing nothing at all, how about you scale back and look at the big picture? you do all these things but where do they get you? i'm not seeing forward movement amongst all this movement i'm just seeing energy bouncing around in a box not going anywhere. perhaps all this stuff you do is to distract you from things you don't want to deal with. it's giving this meme
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crazily enough, it is often true that less really is more (though in today's society that sentiment is going extinct and needs to be revived). try to stop dabbling in everything - a jack of all trades is a master to none. what activities/hobbies would you like to be an expert at? is there a craft you could or would want to monetize? what is it that you're avoiding in your life with these multitudes of distractions? give yourself a breather so that you can see the big picture clearer. you'll come to understand the value in setting healthy boundaries for yourself, knowing when to extend and when to just relax. sometimes it is okay to hold off and hold back because maybe there is something that needs to be dealt with first, maybe more time is needed, maybe something is just not worth the effort for now
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looking at the image for this pile gave me such a heavy, wistful feeling. why do you insist on fighting the universe so bad, hm?
are you in a job that sucks? seek something better! are you in a relationship that feels like a chore? love yourself! lean elsewhere! are you majoring in something that makes you miserable? is it worth that? i'm seeing that you need to learn how to trust the universe and follow a new, less traveled path that may be daunting with its uncertainty but you never know what could happen...that is both the best and worst thing about life.
thus far you have been traveling down the same path, you are very involved with this life that you have been trying to make work but i don't know if it's working, do you?
i'm hearing "give yourself a try" by the 1975!
you're learning allllll about the possibilities of life this year and why you should not in fact settle for what you are too afraid to leave. your heart is yours to follow
----------for pile 4 ⊹
oh, y'all take things to heart in an unhealthy way and are perpetually dissatisfied as a result. i imagine someone who gets in their feels over something minor that someone said in passing and instead of asking for clarification or reasoning with themselves, they act all woe is me and curl up in their room with the misbelief that nothing and no one gets them.
emotions can be deeply felt and i wouldn't say feelings can be liars per se but feelings can mislead us if we read too much into them. plus, when we focus too heavily on our own feelings we become engrossed in them to the point of self-defeating self-absorption. you have got to learn how to take things less personally, your lesson for this year is to learn how to socialize...how to mingle...how to have acquaintances...how to have a conversation and drop it afterwards instead of reading into every little thing and finding what's wrong with it. learning how to be embrace the more positive qualities of aquarius basically.
you have some misguidings to work through, there is illusory amuck due to you making mountains out of molehills - the melodrama is doing nothing good for you i'm afraid, tumblr girlies do love some tragedy and a feeling-dump post but for now...let's free ourselves i beg. it's not that deep, it's not that serious, get a grip and let it go. get off the internet, limit social media, touch grass, find some people to converse with even if its small talk at a checkout, somethin, otherwise you can continue to wallow i guess.
----------for pile 5 ⊹
nah...this pile gave me such a bad headache because...you're....whew......there's some narcissistic tendencies here i'm afraid. even if you think you're an angel sweetheart birthed from mary the unicorn, i assure you that you can in fact be a nothing short of domineering. there is a diva energy, there is a my way or the highway energy, there is an i'm upset so everyone is going to know energy, there is some area in your life where you are a tyrant.
there is a dire need to learn to take a step back, gather yourself, and consider others before unleashing your control and bulldozing your way through situations. you shall be forced to learn how to chill tf out this year and i claim that for you tbh because giving me a headache from your energy is WILD.
you need to examine your connections and make sure you're being receptive towards others. do you feel like you're a true friend to them? do you think you're supportive? do you hear them out? do you know what they're going through? do you know how they feel? do you attend to them in the ways they want and need? do you know what those wants and needs are?
make sure you're not being demanding and setting unreasonable expectations, especially for others. also look within yourself and make sure you're not overcompensating for any insecurities you may possess by having power trips. care about being a friend this year, play the supporting role and balance yourself out
----------for pile 6 ⊹
you're going in circles in your head and your heart, babes. eventually you just gotta rip off the bandaid and make a decision and let the chips fall where they may.
you're waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay in your head, you have all these thoughts and ideas, you have all these feelings and sentiments, you have all these things in mind that you want to set up for yourself, and there's so much that you're overloading yourself....there's no way to process all of it at once so nothing is getting done.
make decisions, find answers, get a grip on your feelings, and try to make sure you're not so in your head that you're putting up a guard around yourself. not everything is black & white or a matter of life or death, you're looking at it too extremely! lighten up and just do.
get a cool haircut, get some new accessories, try new boba, talk to your crush, life is meant to be lived!
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wol-fica · 7 months
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-𝕊𝕙𝕖 ℙ𝔸ℝ𝕋 𝟚-
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parings - jennaortega x fem!reader
summary - before jenna ortega became a huge actress and held the world in her hand, she only had you
warnings - angst, high schoolers lol, all characters are 18 and up :)
an - hi :) [DISCLAIMER: This story is not affiliated with @/tonyspanks ‘SHE’ series. Two different stories, same title]
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The school day flew by for you, all because you couldn't stop thinking about the sweet girl who invited you over for studying. Every class you were scolded for zoning out, but you couldn't help thinking of what events could occur at the certain latina’s house.
You had never been invited over before; yes you have been by the house to drop off Jenna’s younger twins because she was to sick to pick them up from school, but you had never been inside. 
But unfortunately, all your excitement was diminished when you spotted Jenna standing at her locker, with Houston Moores, the star football player of the highschool team. He was leaning up against the wall, standing over her with a playful smile on his face, and as you drew closer, you could hear Jenna giggling.
Not wanting an interaction with the two, you went straight for your locker and started gathering your things to head home. Jenna turned around from the noise and instantly smiled she saw you, her eyes lighting up like a christmas tree.
"Y/N!" She cheesed, giving the you a swift hug.
Butterflies erupted in your stomach, startling you so much that you jolted backwards at the abrupt gesture. Jenna looked at you with concern, her eyes softening at your startled state.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." She said, fixing the wrinkles in your shirt.
You shook your head, the few strands of hair that hung at the front of your face came undone, so you subtly tucked them back behind your ear. Jenna found that action one of the most adorable things you do, along with the way your nose crinkles when you laugh, and how your eyebrows knit together when you are focused.
"It's fine Jenna, I'm good." You replied with a small smile..
Jenna returned the smile before someone behind them coughed harshly. Your y/e/c eyes met Houston’s coffee brown ones, which happened to be filled with confusion and jealousy. Jenna seemed to have someone flick a switch inside her, and she straightened her self up immediately.
"Hey, I'm sorry but I don't think you can come over today." Jenna said to you, giving you an apologetic frown.
You raised an eyebrow, but refrained from speaking. Something that you learned from being constantly picked on, is to keep silent, you found out that if you don't give a reaction, the latter will leave you alone.
"I'm sorry." Jenna repeated, watching your every
move.
"It's fine, I think I had some stuff to do anyways." You lied, giving a fake smile that only Jenna could recognize.
"Are you sure?" She asked, taking a small step towards you.
You scoffed, shoving the last of your belongings into your book bag. You slung it over your shoulder, turning to face the girl you were so obsessed with.
"I'm sure, most don't get angry with their friends canceling on them repeatedly." You sneered, sarcasm laced in your voice.
You stared down Jenna’s beautiful brown eyes before turning on your heel and hurrying off to your car outside. Yes, you felt somewhat bad for yelling at her, but at the same time you didn't regret what you said. Jenna had canceled on you constantly in the past, creating a repetitive nature of the two of you making plans but not ever meeting up. It ended causing you to never want to even try to make plans, because Jenna would inevitably drop out at the last minute.
'It's whatever, she doesn't even care half the time' You thought bitterly.
Little did you know, she was watching you run off, a sinking feeling in her chest telling her that she definitely did care.
———————————
After your mini tantrum in front of Jenna, you proceeded to head to a drunk Halloween themed party the next day. You wanted to get your mind off of the rose smelling sweetheart by drinking off your sorrows with tons and tons of vodka.
Sounds great!
Currently you were getting ready, putting the final touches on your costume. You decided to go as 'Lara Croft' from 'Tomb Raider', but as things were expensive and you weren’t gonna try to make a red carpet worthy outfit, you settled for a more watered down version. In your opinion, all you had to do was wear a tank top, shorts, and combat boots, roll in dirt, then have a bow and arrow on your back.
"I can't believe my sister is going to a cheesy Halloween party!" Theo said dramatically, taking photos of you while you finished up your makeup.
"I'm not six Theo, I'm allowed to go to parties." You replied, putting your mascara away.
"You are missing my point! Y/N Y/L/N, a lesbian, is gonna hang with a bunch of low ledge straights!"
You snorted, shaking out your hair that hung loosely around your shoulders. You decided to let it loose, seeing that now was a perfect time to 'fuck up the normal'. After you finished cleaning your vanity, you turned to see your brother shaking his head at you.
"Cmon Theo, if you are so concerned just come with me." You suggested, grabbing your bag.
"I don't have a costume dingus, I can't just show up."
Theo responded while using your red lipstick.
You rolled your eyes as you packed your bag with the necessary things you relies on, including your epipen, your inhaler, and an extra sweater because fashion changes are vital. Most of the time you wouldn't have to use your medical devices, but you still needed them in the case an emergency happened. It would be bad to go into shock at a drunk party anyways. 
"Theo, you look like a drag queen half the time, if you show up like how you do know no one will care." You said, throwing your bag over your shoulder.
Theo gave you a glare, paused in thought, then slumped his shoulders and walked past you.
"Fine, but if you get laid don't come running to me for a ride home." He snipped, grabbing his keys.
"Who the hell would want to have sex with me Theo?"
"Oh I dunno, Jenna Ortega?"
You froze in your tracks, slowly turning to face your brother. He had a triumphant smirk on his face, and his eyes showed gleams of curiosity.
"Y/N/N, I'm not stupid. I see the way you gawk at her." Theo said, getting into the drivers side.
You slowly followed suit, sliding slowly into the passenger seat next to him. He stared at you , cocking his head to the side.
"Y/N..." He started.
"What." You snapped, your arms crossed over your chest.
Theo sighed and squinted at the road ahead of him, aware of the cars passing by.
"Listen, I wasn't trying to be mean."
You were silent, watching the trees whizzing by in the background, your mind feeling melted.
"Y/N/N, I understand how you-."
"No, you don't!" You hissed, glaring at your half-brother.
See, you and Theo used to not get along; your relationship as half-siblings was exceedingly complicated and torn, as your father decided to ditch both of your moms and left you all to fend for yourselves for years until he came back on his hands and knees begging to be let back in. All he wanted was the money, but your mom never saw that and still hasn’t to this day.
Theo took on the role as a father figure to you, even though you both are the same age, but along with that he gained the trait of strictness and the indescribable obsession to make sure he always knew where you were. Those traits were lost when your family moved last summer, but that doesn't mean you forgot.
"You don't understand at all! You don't know what it's like to fall in love with someone who won't ever
consider you, who is happily living her dream and doesn't even like girls!" You yelled, slamming your hands down on top of the glove box. 
You gripped the cheap plastic, feeling it crack under you fingertips before you spoke, “She doesn’t even like me.”
You slumped backwards again, leaning to look back out the window. Everything you said was true, and unfortunately your feelings had grown subsequently for Jenna, but it seemed to you that you would never be able to have what you dreamt of.
"I'm sorry." Theo whispered.
"It's okay." You whispered back, keeping your gaze on the word outside.
Theo sighed but pressed the gas pedal down, driving down the wet road to the raging Halloween party.
——————————
taglist: @cartierdreamx@tundra1029@red1culous@vorsdany@andsoigotabutterfly@theafterofnevermore@yomomisgay@house-of-lovin@slvt4lanadelrey@thenextdawn@nepobaby08@dunohilly@somekindofpoet@alexkolax@cinffy23@pedrosprincess@amberfreemansburntface@myfturn
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braxlrose · 24 days
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I miss ur writings sm :(
I am so sorry that I've been gone for so long, I haven't posted any fan fiction in so many months and honestly I lost motivation 😭 so many ppl who were in this fandom and I created a community with, were slowly getting over this "phase" and it definitely affected me. But I'm going to try and get back into writing. I hope this will do good for now! Ive had a lot of ppl recently ask for 2005 bill hcs, and I've done that before so if this is repetitive for something else I've written, sorry!
content warnings: none
a/n: I'll be updating my tag list since it hasn't been updated since like August of last year and I don't want to be tagging people who don't care or want to see these posts anymore. So if you wanna be tagged, let me know!
2005!bill kaulitz x f!reader
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sfw:
- I'm an alternative person so whenever I write for bill, I always imagine him with an alternative girl 😞 even though from what I've seen he's never really been w/ an alternative one, BUT LETS PRETEND OKAY 🙏🙏
• he absolutely loves doing hair together, I think he enjoys helping you do your hair in the morning and your make up. And he's even more greatful if you do his makeup. Then he can just relax while you help him.
• pookie has crunchy ass hair at the end of the day when he has to wash it out, don't make fun of him 😞
• getting piercings together is something he LOVES doing with you. Mainly early piercings because he only has a tongue and eyebrow piercing on his face.
• if you made music too, he would always go to your concerts and basically scream the entire time. Hopefully, you'd do the same for him.
• if you have longer nails, head scratches are always a must and he will lay in your lap for literal hours while you pamper him.
- I personally think he would love to learn words in your language if you keep something different than German. And despite what anybody thinks, he finds it hilarious to learn the dirty words.
• if you cook him something from your culture, he will literally die. He basically thinks everything about you is so cool, and learning about a culture different from his is so exciting
• but if you two really want to date, you'll have to both try to learn English or each other language because there is going to be a hard language barrier between you two.
- I think one of the reasons he would've fallen in love with you is because you were upfront with him. He's not the type of guy to just go up and kiss someone so if you confess first, that would make things so much easier.
- obviously, you'd have to get along with Tom, Georg and Gustav. So if you don't, there's no way he'll go out with you, especially if you can't get along or hate Tom.
-Dates together consist of stuff you guys bought somewhere, or if you guys went to a fastfood restaurant.
• He doesn't have a lot of money yet so dates wouldn't exactly be high class, hopefully you don't mind 😉
-Since this is around the time Tokio Hotel is getting increasingly famous, there are fangirls around trying to flirt and ask out bill all the time and he has to shoo them off. He reminds you every night about how much he loves you and that those fan girls shouldn't bother you.
-he likes to spoon you a lot, and you two switch back n forth between him being the big spoon and the small spoon.
• I think he also really likes it when you lay on top of him, with your face in his neck and your legs wrapped around him. (This also works sitting upwards).
• cuddling with him is so nice too because he actually smells really good 😱
- I think he still gets very insecure sometimes because of the haters and people who harass the band because they don't like them and you reassure him a lot.
a/n pt 2: sorry this wasn't too long! I'm trying to get back into the groove of writing so if this is terrible I'm sorry 😞
taglist: none right now
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factual-fantasy · 29 days
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Heya Factual! Wanted to give ya a million pats on the back for the new art- obviously it looks great as always- but also I'm always excited for new Grimace lore! The monopoly gag was hilarious- I actually thought it was serious for a moment- and then I was ecstatic to see him finally evolve into a Gengar- now he looks even more like Grimace than ever before!
Seeing him evolve reminded me of an interesting fact that I wanted to tell you and Grimace- it's been recently confirmed that Gengar is actually the favorite Pokemon of Atsushi Nagashima, the game director of the entire Pokemon TCG! He said during a recent tour that that's the reason Gengar gets so many cards every year- is because he just likes him a whole lot! So anytime Grimace is feeling down, he can remember that he and his kin hold a special place in the heart of the man responsible for balancing their very existence- at least on the table top!
As for my usual Mario stuff- thanks again for answering my last batch of Asks- I think your implementation of Snifits especially will work quite well! And as for today- I just wanted to keep it simple, and ask for some clarifications regarding an already existing species in the AU, if that's okay, that being the spooky scary dry bones!
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You've mentioned them a couple times I'm the past- I believe as creations of Kamek- but I don't think you've ever drawn them- any ideas what they'd look like in your style? Would they maintain any semblance of their former selves- or be mindless zombies like in the movie? What would be involved in creating one? And would the spell only work on normal koopas- or would it be used to raise other creatures- perhaps even deceased royal Koopas to create dry Bowsers!?
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And also as a sort of side Ask- have you seen the Super Mario Bros Movie yet? If you have what did you think? I noticed you mention it in the last post regarding the Snifits- but I couldn't tell if you were talking about the trailer or the film itself...
(Oh, and as always, thanks for taking the time to answer all our Asks- hope you're finally over the hill and feeling a bit better!)
@neo-metalscottic (Monopoly gag post) (Gengar evolve post)
Thank you so much!! :DD I'm glad you had fun with those posts! XDD And that's so interesting! :0 I would have thought his favorite Pokémon was Pikachu XDD
Now for your dry bones questions...
As for the royal koopas thing.. When Kamek beings something to live/back to life. They are basically just a mindless zombie. They hold no memories of their old selves it seems.. so when a royal koopa dies, they just let them rest. Becuase bringing them back to life would just make them this mindless drone.. not only would it be disgusting and depressing, but its also probably seen as rather disrespectful. To bring someone of such high status back to life as a mindless slave is just.. not great. Hence why Bowsers wife was simply buried when she passed. There's nothing Kamek could do to bring the real her back..
As for the dry bones, I have a solid concept. Buuuut I'm not super sure how it fits into the AU quite yet..
I was thinking that however many years ago.. there was some kind of war or battle that the koopa kingdom was involved in. And they were losing. They were losing too many soldiers.. So out of desperation.. The current king and queen ordered Kamek to do the unthinkable. Bring their fallen soldiers back to life..
They won the battle. But at a cost. Now the majority of their army/citizens are these mindless zombies.. its hard to say how much of the original koopa remains in these dry bones.. since they don't seem to have any memories of their past life..
The remaining living koopas would eventually repopulate and grow in in numbers. They would also learn to live along side the dry bones.. But its always really disturbing to be a koopa and seeing your great grandfather's corpse mindlessly wandering the streets.. still wearing the same armor he was wearing when he died during the great war..
As for their appearance, I actually pictured them being rather large skeletons. A lot of them are missing limbs or have broken bones.. they are all wearing old timey armor that they had on during the war. They are rather mindless and unresponsive to most things.. Though I imagine when some kind of danger is spotted, they suddenly jump to life and become really animated. Rushing towards the threat and neutralizing it swiftly and violently. Just like the soldiers did back in the day..
Once the threat is neutralized, they slump their shoulders. And begin to slowly wander again…
There's a lot I would like to do with this. I wanna experiment with the koopas interacting with the dry bones. Perhaps covering them in flowers to pay respects but to also make them seem less scary to children..
Perhaps some koopa families find their relatives and guide them by the hand back home and have them participate in family gatherings. Maybe its their way of coping.. or they're just showing love. "No matter how far gone you seem or how long ago you died, I still love you. And you are still apart of this family." 🥺
Sometime I'd like to draw them on my pc. But as it stands I'm still rather unwell and cant sit at my desk for very long 😭💔
As a last note, I did finally watch the Mario movie! :D... IIIIt was about what I expected. <XD
Other than Mario and Luigi's relationship being spot on? I found myself rolling my eyes the whole movie. Its probably safe to say that I'm not the target audience and that most people had a lot of fun with it.
And hey! If I didn't like the movie, I can just make my own Mario universe. Which is what I did! XDD
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misssmeat · 1 year
Text
30 Things I Learned Before Turning 30
In celebration of my next decade, I took some time to document some of the obvious and not-so-obvious pieces of wisdom I've collected in my life. I wrote this as an exercise to celebrate my own growth, but I thought I would share it.
I spent over half of my 20s with all of you, here on tumblr. It was a messy decade spent figuring out who I am, what I want, and how to create the life I dream of. I'm ending my 20s happier, more sure of myself, and excited for the future. Thanks for joining me on the journey.
Here's to the next decade of being older. Wiser. Sexier. Here's to 30.
Love and Relationships
Give it three dates if you’re on the fence about someone. Love at first sight (or first date) is rare.
If he’s significantly older and makes you feel special for being “mature for your age”… there is something very wrong. He’s gross, and I promise you’ll see it one day and be furious for your past self.
Co-dependency is not love. 
Your partner is not your therapist. Do not treat them as such. 
Holding hands is a superior form of intimacy. 
Sometimes love isn’t enough. 
As annoying and cliche as it is, self-love is the most important love you’ll discover. 
Be intentional in your relationships - intentionally make time, intentionally show care, intentionally respect your partner, intentionally adore. (This applies to friendships too.)
Strong relationships are built on strong foundations. Communication, trust, kindness.
Life is made of millions of tiny moments. The tiny moments make the difference more than the grand gestures. 
Sex and Kink
Sex is supposed to be fun. Too many people forget this. It’s adult playtime. Don’t take yourself too seriously. 
Your limits are sacred. Never let anyone convince you otherwise. 
There is no such thing as a “true” sub/Dom/etc. Do what makes you happy. It’s really that simple. 
Confidence is 75% of success in the bedroom. I never truly know what I’m doing, but if I act like I’m the hottest girl on earth… my partner goes nuts for me regardless.
Keep water near at all times.  
Bondage is much more physically taxing than you might imagine. A rope buddy taught me to keep chocolate near for the sugar boost after physically taxing positions. 
Sometimes things get messy. Don’t worry, it’s normal. 
Give feedback and be open to feedback. We are all different, so there should be a learning curve with each partner.
Butt stuff hurts a lot less if you train your muscles slowly over time. 
If you’re not in the mood, don’t feel pressure to force it. Respect what your body is telling you. Likewise, respect your partner if they aren’t in the mood. 
Everything Else 
Ladies - unlearn creating yourself for the male gaze. It’s overrated.
Western cooking isn’t always superior. See the fried egg in France vs. Hong Kong. I’ll die on this hill.
Your worth and value are not tied to anything you’re offering or producing. Existing is the most radical thing we can do. 
Find a hobby that doesn’t require the internet. I found painting and reading. 
Your energy is valuable. Be selective in where and how you invest it.
When washing your hair, go through your shampoo routine twice before conditioning.
Go on walks. Touch grass. Feel the sun on your skin.
When in doubt, adopt a cat. 
Go to therapy. No matter where you are on your mental health journey, therapy will probably be a game changer.
Do not underestimate the power of forgiveness. Holding onto anger is not as empowering as I once believed it was.
And one last bonus thought: no matter what, always make space for joy.
❤️.
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e-vay · 2 months
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Hi E-Vay! I was wondering...I'm currently teaching myself art and how to draw and stuff, and since you're such a master and youre the one that inspired me, I was wondering...you got any advice? And I don't mean the generic "practice makes perfect" and "tutorials available" and "look at your references" kinda advice, (which is nice and helpful too) but like "oh jeez I REALLY WISH I'd known THIS" kinda advice.
K thanks all the love and kisses bye! 💋
That is so kind of you to say, thank you! I’m really excited to see what you come up with!
I know those tips are repeated by artists a lot, but that’s because they work! You really do just have to keep at it and use references and you’re guaranteed to improve.
I do have two “tricks” I learned late in life that I wish I had known sooner. These won’t be a cure-all but it has made a difference for me:
1 - If you do digital drawings, FLIP YOUR CANVAS! Flip it REPEATEDLY! Our eyes have a habit of correcting things, so we can’t always tell that the faces are askew or that your character is leaning very far forward. So every so often, mirror your canvas and you’ll be shocked to see how weird it looks! Make those corrections. And then flip it back. If you don’t draw digitally, you can still do this with traditional art by rotating your paper or canvas upside down. You’ll see errors in your work and you should be able to fix it.
2 - DO WARM UP SKETCHES! I thought this was so stupid when I first heard it, but ever since I started doing it holy moly it’s made a difference. Creating art is like exercising: you really need to warm those muscles up first to get the best results. So if you do a sketch or two before you jump into your big project, it really helps.
Happy drawing! 🥰
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extra-vertebrae · 3 months
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Hello! I followed u an eon ago on a different account, and am so excited to see ur art come up on my feed again. Idk if this is the best place to send this; Id feel awkward sending a whole email for this and I dont have a twitter anymore (dumpster fire.) i love all ur designs, but I keep coming back to ur pokemon ones. I’m so fond of them. It makes me want to experiment w body horror art.
I know ppl have sent u mean-spirited asks in the past abt them. I just want to say: I went thru ur old art and said a variation of “aww, a cutie!” Or “oh, poor babyyy :(“ in the occasion that their breeding has created things like chronic pain. At no point was I thinking. Idk, they were ugly or mean (to the pokemon franchise)? To me, ppl like that just have bad taste 🤷🏽‍♀️
I do wanna see more of ur original stuff, certainly! Im just being nostalgic rn.
Thank you so much for your message! I'm glad you still enjoy those old designs, and that they're inspiring you to give body horror themes a try!
Thankfully most of those types of messages are gone, though I'm sure my lack activity in the Pokemon space since then has probably helped a lot in this regard.
Haha, I still find a lot of them pretty cute, too. There's some good design shapes and ideas in some of those older pieces that maybe I can recycle and refine or develop into something new someday.
I definitely would like to share more original work; I'm going through a sort of transitional phase with my art at the moment, so there isn't much to share that I legitimately feel like posting. I can, however, share this lineup of vehicular characters that were sketched up some weeks ago for Funky Town:
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I've always had a general appreciation for mechanical shapes and design; I've learned that that general appreciation runs deeper than anticipated, so hard surface focused / adjacent design has been where my mind has been at recently.
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plenilune · 4 months
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what a weird year it's been! this time last year I remember being so high on not wanting to die for the first time in years that I was ecstatic to greet 2023 and find out what I could do in it -- I don't feel that way this year, buffetted about by circumstance and my stupid human body and brain, but I don't feel defeated. I feel like I made a good first pass at a piece of work and now I'm going to take a hack at another draft. I made some good ground. not all the ground I was hoping to make, but a lot I wasn't expecting. I feel good about my ability to keep building a life and a self I can be more and more joyful to occupy.
I tried a lot of new things and some of them didn't work but most of them did. I said yes to a lot of weird shit. I had so many experiences this year. I'm glad I spent a night dancing and smoking on the fire escape outside a masonic lodge and being absolutely drenched in rain. I'm glad Corey and I went on a gorgeous queer group ride with a bunch of other queer cyclists through the streets of our favourite parts of northern Kentucky and then bicycled back home together. I'm glad I had a not-quite-one-night stand and bused home as the sun rose golden and alive and lovely. I'm glad I re-learned the importance of dancing at clubs until I can barely move. I'm glad I saw Oldboy in the cinema and was so adrenalised that I jumped up and down on the sidewalk and screamed waiting for my bus home. I started painting back patches and sewing things onto my clothing and making jewellery and collaging and cropping all my tshirts and sweaters.
I started writing again .god, I started writing again.
and I broke my phone, my glasses, and my computer and struggled financially and took a nightmarish disaster trip to Philadelphia for my grandmother's funeral and I lost access to meds for reasons that were completely my own fault and thus sunk into a mire of depression and fatigue for several months that could have been completely avoided. I struggled to connect to people and struggled to feed myself and been a goddamn wreck. I didn't really accomplish most of the things I thought I was going to, that I started with eagerness and energy at the beginning of the year.
but hell. I built some shit. now I can keep building on top of it. I feel like a completely different person sometimes now, with different possibilities. I fucked up and lost and careened into walls of bad luck over and over this year but I feel better for and about it than I have in a long time. okay, that's new muscles. okay okay okay. new page, new draft, we can go again.
anyway. this year I want to push forward more deliberately on some of the stuff I found out I could do this year -- obviously I am continuing to work on my goddamn space heist book, but also specifically pursue block printing, drag/burlesque, bass, and making zines in 2024 instead of just experimenting with them. bicycle more, cook more, invest in people more, Not Go Off My Meds At Any Point, play more video games, watch more films. (I watched over sixty this year! after barely watching films for so long I didn't know what my own taste was any more, and feeling the shame and confusion of having once been a kid who wanted to go to film school but didn't know what movies they liked any more.)
anyway. here's to all of you who have kept me alive and interested in the world this year. my beloved partner is making arriabbiata and playing jazz in the next room. I have to work first thing tomorrow but tonight I'm going to finish the first season of Better Call Saul and poke at my novel and the day after tomorrow I'm going to have tea and listen to music and sew patches onto my jacket and best flannel. I'm going to keep finding new things to be alive for. I'm going to create a self I want to live inside. I'm excited to know what things are going to happen to me in 2024. I'm excited to learn about new ways to feel joy.
goodnight, 2023. you were a mess and I loved you more often than I didn't.
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cafeinthemoon · 11 months
Text
King - Chapter VI
Chapter 6/?
Wordcount 5,6k
Title A Kingdom of Women
Fandom Shuumatsu no Valkyrie / Record of Ragnarok
Previous chapters
1 . 2 . 3 . 4 . 5
Symbols ⭕ . ➕ . 🖤
Warnings: Mentions of unwanted pregnancies; multiple pregnancies; basically, Poseidon is not a good man
Tagging @cloveradora @the-dumber-scaramouche @mikkies @sl33py-zer0 @nooneknows8976 (If you want to be tagged in any of my stories, just leave a comment on this chapter or send an ask or a message)
N. A.: Wow, finally a new chapter for this story! Even I find it hard to believe lol As pointed out by a reader in the comments, this story demands a lot of effort, and one of the reasons is obviously the chapters' lenght. This time, it's longer than all the others, as a compensation for the lack of updates. Tbh many things happened in the last weeks that kept me away from my works, but I don't want to discuss them here. It's not worthy.
Here are some hints about this chapter:
I tried to make Poseidon's character closer to his mythological version, which includes his relations with women. Though he doesn't make a proper appearance in this one, his presence is felt in each event, each sentence. He's the main subject of the conversations, whether in a positive or negative way. I love when this kind of stuff is included in stories to emphasize the importance of a character, and I hope I managed to do it right :)
Here we will have the first solid (or not) info about Amphitrite. I like Amphitrite's figure, and I will turn her into an important part of the structure here.
Of course, the selkie's skin is in her husband's possession. The thing with selkies' skin doesn't sit right to me, and I used this concept to create another source of tension for this story.
Finally, I'm sorry for the big delay and I hope you enjoy this new chapter :)
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Yes, you have to stay vigilant, but no one can do this forever. Even the strongest can get exhausted. So, you need to relax. The thing is that you must learn when and where – and with who – you will allow yourself to rest. This can be scary in the beginning, and you will feel the most terrifying loneliness, but experience will come, and you will find balance.
Remember: your home is where your friends are.
When you were sent back to the lodge, the only things you wanted were a bit of silence and a moment by yourself, so you could process the events of the last day, your new position as a married woman and the task that was now in your hands: how would you manage to do something that only the most experienced masters were able to do, you who were never trained in any form of combat, not even in the use of knives? Yes, you did get your wish of not bearing a child answered, but were you really successful in your negotiations with your husband? You doubted that, and as to keep you in your place, he made sure you didn��t think you were.
Well, contrary to your wishes, once you stepped into the room and were left there by the servant (the same who took you to the ceremony’s preparations), you were barely allowed to readjust in it, because Alyssa was just too excited to see you again: ignoring your requests for her to be careful, she left her spot at the window and almost ran toward you when the door was opened, her hands around her belly as to protect the baby from her own recklessness.
– Y/n?! Y/n! Is that really you?!
You sighed in relief when she stopped in front of you with no troubles, but didn’t have time to think of this because the girl wrapped her arms around you and gave you the tightest hug that her condition allowed her.
– You’re finally back! – her voice was a rushed whisper – You should have been sent back yesterday, so when the night passed with no sign of you, I feared that something might have happened to you! But I’m glad you’re okay…
Though you were touched by those words, you preferred not try to wonder what Alyssa had in mind.
– Thank you – you moved away to look into her eyes – He decided to keep me with him for the entire night, so I had no choice. I’m sorry for causing you such anxiety.
You went to sit with her on your bed.
– So, yes, I’m back, but I don’t think okay is the best word to describe myself right now.
The girl frowned.
– No? How so?
You stood in silence for a moment, trying to find the appropriate way to turn your thoughts into words... And, when you did, was solely to provoke in your friend a laughing crisis.
– So… – you started – You told me that many things could happen once I found myself in Poseidon-sama’s presence… But why didn’t you tell me that this included being carried around like a bag of potatoes?
The sound of Alyssa’s laughter filled the enormous room before you could even finish the word potatoes. Her body trembled as she fought to control it, covering her mouth and closing her eyes tight, tears rolling through her hands. At first, you showed impatience – after all, being laughed at by a god by what he saw as fragility was a serious matter to you – but her reaction was so genuine that you just couldn’t stay mad.
– Alyssa, that’s not funny, okay? I didn’t enjoy being treated like that! It was humiliating and I just want to forget it!
– A bag of potatoes! Just imagine the Lord of the Seas carrying one! I can’t!
– Stop it! – you yelled, laughing too.
She took a deep breath and, then, was finally able to speak normally again.
– I’m so sorry, but I couldn’t help it! I was so worried about you and then, when you finally come back, this is the first thing you have to say? – she raised her hands in rendition – It’s just too hilarious!
You rolled your eyes.
– I wish I could see things that way.
Calming down, Alyssa gave you another reason for her attitude.
– Well, actually, it’s not just funny. I’m also surprised that he did this to you as well.
Now, you were the surprised one.
– What do you mean?
– When I was brought to the altar, I was wearing a transparent dress, so the first thing that Poseidon-sama noticed was the size of my legs – the girl explained – He didn’t say anything about them, but his disappointment filled the space between us. When he grabbed my hand and took me to the chambers where our wedding would be consummated, he made a comment about me being too slow and started carrying me on his shoulder – and, as if deliberating with herself, – But you’re a bit taller than me, you know? You must be able to walk faster… – she shrugged – Well, I guess this isn’t enough for him as well… – turning back to you, she suddenly changed the subject – But what about the wedding? The first time you saw him? What did you think? How did it feel like? Tell me everything!
Your cheeks got warm when you recalled the wedding night. You still had mixed feelings about it, so that you weren’t cheering for all that happened, at the same time that you weren’t really sad. But since you were still trying to digest such feelings, you sensed that this wasn’t the time to discuss them; Alyssa could be an understanding friend in case you did it, but you wouldn’t overwhelm her when she was so content for having you back.
– Well, I… Since our family was never devoted to any god, I had no idea of what to expect – you started – I just thought that Poseidon-sama would be similar to the statues we use to see in the temples’ entries and the public spaces. So I was really surprised when I finally saw him – you lowered your tone – He’s beautiful… And with a beauty that’s simply impossible for any human!
– I know – Alyssa commented – He firmly believes that gods are the ultimate bearers of perfection, so he does anything to embody this idea.
You chuckled.
– And I have to say it works in his case. Still, there are some unsettling things about him, such as, when you only take his appearance into account, you might think he’s around our age, but when you look into his eyes, this illusion disappears, and he looks older than everyone, anything you know… – a shiver appeared on your neck and went down your back while you remembered the god’s eyes – Older and terrifying.
Alyssa had an explanation for this.
– He’s one of the eldest deities from Greece, and was chosen to rule over the Domain of the Seas before the mythological ages. Water is a primordial element from all known worlds, including ours, you know? It’s only appropriate.
– Makes sense.
– Besides… you probably noticed that he’s not exactly a mild-tempered man – she lowered her voice, as if afraid of being heard by anyone beyond you.
You remembered the quake on the day you arrived and could only agree.
– This is why I was so worried for you, y/n – Alyssa continued – You’re just so lucky that he didn’t find any reasons to be displeased with you…
You bit your lip.
– Well… maybe he already did.
Your friend opened her mouth and closed it again, and you felt her fear and preoccupation in that small gesture. She asked what were you talking about.
– When Poseidon-sama took me to the chambers where we would have our wedding night, I made him a request – you swallowed – I asked him not to impregnate me.
Alyssa needed to make a superhuman effort to not scream when she heard that.
– You what?! But, how did you…?! – she shook her head – Do you have any idea of what it means to ask such thing from a god? Even more Poseidon-sama?
You let out an impatient sigh.
– I didn’t want to come here and I didn’t want to get married! You already know that – and, calming down a bit, – Not bearing a child was the last hint of freedom I could think of maintaining in this place, so I risked everything I still had (which wasn’t that much) in a deal with him. I’m a merchant, don’t you remember? – you shrugged – This preservation instinct... it runs in our blood.
The other girl frowned, still not believing that you indeed negotiated with Poseidon.
– Well, can you tell me the whole story, then?
– Of course.
And for the next minutes you recalled the events of that night, as well as the mission you received from your husband that morning, moments before he sent you back to the lodge, not hiding anything – except the nickname he gave you. Alyssa listened to each word carefully, not making a single interruption, but the sudden changes in her expression as the story followed revealed everything you needed to know about her feelings towards it.
In the end, by the fact that you returned to the room and the consistence of your narration, she was convinced that the god answered your plead; besides, she remembered seeing a small table close to the bed with a bottle upon it, both similar to the objects you described, and it was easy to imagine that there was a contraceptive fluid inside it.
However, she didn’t think her husband agreed with this deal as if moved by anything that resembled mercy, and she said that to you.
– By what I could see from him, I agree with you – was your reply – The nature of this mission is a proof itself.
Your friend let a hesitant “hm” escape.
– Yes, but that’s not exactly what I’m talking about…
– How so?
She gave you a worried gaze.
– I guess I didn’t tell you everything you need to know about being married with the god of the Seas – she moved upon the bed in discomfort – Look… Having children with desirable traits is not the only reason why Poseidon-sama has so many wives. The fact that most of us conceive in our first time with him makes us… unavailable for quite some time, to start with. There are other factors that might separate him from us, such as sickness and recovering periods between one pregnancy and the next, as well as when his presence is requested out of his domains, mostly in councils at Valhalla, which forces him to stay away for weeks, sometimes for months. For all of this, it’s convenient for him that some his wives are infertile or ask him to not have babies.
You frowned. So, there were women who were unable to bear children among you, and that wasn’t a problem for him? And you weren’t the first to make him that type of request? Well, now that you thought about it, it was only logical that you wouldn’t be: Poseidon has been taking wives for centuries, and you couldn’t suppose that all of them were willing to become mothers.
Besides...
– So, you’re telling me that if I’m not having a baby anytime soon, it means that he will…
It was unnecessary to finish the sentence. Alyssa gave you a silent nod. It was now more than clear that your request wasn’t the most clever decision from your part, something that you could have avoided if you were familiar with gods and their whims.
So, he’s this kind of man, then? Honestly, this side of him was clear for all the time we were together.
Still, you had some counterpoints.
– Alyssa, if I’m not the first to make this type of proposal to him, why did you react that way?
– First, because of your courage, perhaps increased by the fact that you know little about gods. Second, because I could never suppose that he would say yes to such proposal coming from a human – she put her hand under her chin, deliberating – He might have had something in mind… Something that we can’t figure out for now…
– Yes, I see, but there are other things that I can’t ignore. For example, what about Amphitrite-sama? She’s a goddess and his first wife. She is above us. I don’t see why he would chase after us when she’s there for him.
The look your friend gave you told you that you were, for one more time, wrong.
– Maybe it’s time for you to know about Amphitrite-sama, y/n.
Alyssa told you that what existed between Poseidon and Amphitrite was a marriage of convenience: she was the daughter of ancient sea deities, who inhabited those lands long before Poseidon’s arrival, and who offered her hand in exchange of their permanence in them; Poseidon accepted the offer as a way to reassure his dominance over the seas, and it has been like this since then. At first, they even tried to live as a normal couple, but it didn’t take long for both to realize it wouldn’t work, so that today they were just two people who shared the same house, and were more like professional partners then husband and wife.
– Amphitrite-sama’s personal life is a mystery to all of us – Alyssa explained – She’s rarely spotted by any of the other wives, and talking to her is almost impossible for us. Only Poseidon-sama, Proteus-sama and the servants are in touch with her routine and habits. We don’t even know exactly her feelings and thoughts towards us: some of the girls believe she hates us, this being the reason why we don’t see her often, but others think she actually cares for us, because she was the first to know the god of the seas as a man, so she’s aware of what is like to be in our place. I’ve never seen her myself, and I’m not sure of what to think, but I think she uses to spend her time out of here, maybe with her family, friends or a lover. I suppose we will never know.
You, from your part, were sure that enduring days and nights beside a man like the Tyrant of the Seas and being forced to accept the presence of thousands of other women in her own house must have been anything but easy. You were able to feel compassion for the goddess, but tried not to think too much about it.
What really interested you about Amphitrite, to be honest, had nothing to do with her private life or marriage.
– I’d understand if she chose to live her life that way. I suppose I myself would do the same if I was in her place – you commented – But, about her role as the Queen of the Seas... how exactly does it work? What are the signs of her presence here?
About this, Alyssa had some words, but they sounded as mysterious as all the rest.
– As far as I know, she shares the administrative matters with her husband, though he’s the one who has the final word in every question – a strange glimmer appeared in her eyes – But I’ve heard some stories that said that she is the real responsible for the maintenance of the palace’s structure, which includes its physical premises, the organization of the staff and their daily routine… and even us.
– What? – you frowned.
– About this, I have my doubts – your friend shrugged – But some say that most of the servants answer directly to her, and that even Proteus-sama fears her. Besides, there are rumors that she has already helped women and their children to leave her husband’s domain forever, as a way to favor the ones who have suffered and to maintain the order, given that the number of women would always vary like this.
– I see.
– Well, whether these stories are true or not, Amphitrite-sama is the Queen of this place, and we should be careful if we ever have to deal with her.
***
During the period that preceded your wedding, you received all your meals inside the lodge by the same hours everyday: since you still haven’t been touched by Poseidon neither you were given the pair of earrings that identified his wives, you still haven’t the right to join the other women in the great hall for breakfasts, lunches and dinners. Alyssa had the said right, but due to the aching that her swollen feet provoked in case she insisted on the long walk to the hall, as well as to make you company, she preferred to eat in the room, where you had a small table prepared for this.
However, now that you were married and were free from physical restrictions, you no longer had reasons to keep yourself separated from the others, so right in the day after you were sent back, a servant came to lead you to have your first lunch in the hall.
Even though you were expecting for this, your heart jumped inside your chest with the perspective of entering a large place full of people who you didn’t know and who weren’t exactly receptive to your kind. You thought of asking your friend to come with you, but didn’t have the courage to do so: you would have to learn to survive there sooner or later, without bringing discomfort to anyone. But, without you expecting it, she offered herself to accompany you.
The servant raised an eyebrow at her.
– Are you really in conditions of walking to the great hall?
– I am – Alyssa replied with all the confidence – Besides, this is an important moment for my friend, and I want to be there with her.
The servant looked from her to you, then back to her, but didn’t argue. They asked both of you to follow them and closed the room’s door as you walked out of it.
***
The servant pushed the pair of golden doors before you with little effort, but they obeyed immediately, revealing the great hall in its full glory.
Just like you imagined, it was similar to other places you’ve been at, in a sense that it carried cleanliness, organization and luxury as its pillars, making it as beautiful as those other premises, with walls decorated with marine concepts, columns of white marble, large tables of noble woods and objects coated in gold – and it was as full as the center of a human city in a market day.
To anywhere you looked, you saw a mixture of colors, shapes and sounds created by priestesses of the Northern Waters, selkies, naiads and other kinds of nymphs, mermaids who were able to change their scales and walk with legs, and many other women from different regions of the known worlds, all of them wearing pearls like yours. Some would proudly exhibit the jewels as if they were the meaning of their lives, but others seemed to have forgotten about their presence on their bodies, just like the pearls became part of them; in fact, some didn’t wear them as proper earrings: there were girls who you guessed to be from the depths of the seas, having delicate, translucent fins instead of ears, and the pearls were pierced on their upper sides; others didn’t have visible auricular organs at all, so the pearls were on their heads, necks and, in some cases, on each side of their hairless faces, where their eyebrows would be.
The majority of the women, which bodies were of humanoid shapes, had their pregnancies evident, with rounded bellies covered in loosen dresses, like to the one you were wearing right now, but others seemed to be just like you, with no protuberance to indicate the presence of a child inside them; and there were some who, despite resembling the human form, were carrying baskets on the fold of their arms in order to transport eggs, and those eggs were from different numbers and appearances. You didn’t see children at that place, and this corroborated with what Alyssa told about them being taken from their mothers after the period of essential activities between them, such as breastfeeding.
Indeed, the scene was strange and beautiful, so much that if you didn’t know what kind of place you were at, you could be led to believe that you were in a kingdom of women.
As you walked through the main corridor, having the long tables at both sides, you recognized some of the girls who traveled with you, but most of them you were seeing for the first time. From their part, the reactions were similar to what you saw when you entered the carriage: at each step you took, the looks of curiosity, suspicion, disdain and explicit discontentment for the presence of, not only one, but two human beings in that sacred house burned your skin and made your heart beat faster.
You glanced at Alyssa and noticed her nervousness.
– Are you alright? – you whispered.
– Yes – she mumbled back, with her hands on her belly – It’s just that I’m no longer used to the distance between our room and this place.
– I see – you looked ahead, and spotted the space where you were supposed to take your food – Let’s get something for us and find a calmer spot to sit at.
You stopped in front of the large pans and the mixed scent of spices, seeds and meat invaded your nostrils alongside the steam. Everything seemed tasty, though you could barely recognize the foods. Unlike the things offered to you at the lodge – everything specially selected for your species – the foods were all mixed there, so Alyssa instructed you while you filled your plate, indicating what would be accepted by your body and what you were better stay away from. In the end, you managed to get a good combination of exotic seafood and typical spices from Midgard, and went to one of the tables.
***
The meal was excellent, and you were content for finding a good spot to sit despite the crowd around you. In order to not gather unwanted attention (at least not more than you already received), you avoided talking while you were there, unless it was strictly necessary. You were careful not to make a mess, and cleaned after ourselves before leaving the table.
To be honest, the hall wasn’t as noisy as you expected: it was more like a party were only the rich attended, with a display of good manners, elegance and the sound of soft voices spreading across the air. You never enjoyed being at that type of event while you lived with your father, but you knew how to behave, using your ears more than your eyes, pretending to be absorbed in your current task and only looking around a few times to make sure you became part of the landscape.
Still, a human who has entered the hall for the first time couldn’t be as invisible as she wished, and you noticed the occasional looks from the people near you. There was a woman in special, who were sitting on the opposite side of your table, three seats away from Alyssa, who wouldn’t take her eyes off you, even when you stared her back; she resembled a human girl in everything, from her brown, wavy hair to her olive skin, the only exception being the aspect of her eyes, bigger, in the slight shape of almonds, with their outer corners turned up. Alyssa noticed her looks and, moving her lips without letting her voice out, she identified her one word.
Selkie.
You’ve never seen an individual from that people before, but you’ve heard stories about some who has been living among humans since the old times; the relations between the two species were never easy, so that you wouldn’t be surprised if that one tried to bring this old feud to the depths of the sea. You already decided to ask about her later, but soon this precaution became unnecessary, for when you stood up and prepared to leave, the sounds of the room were supplanted by a clear, real voice.
– Another human being among us in so little time? Interesting. It seems that our beloved husband is planning to bring change to the family. For reasons only known by himself.
Your eyes turned automatically to the selkie’s direction, and you saw she was already looking at you, now on her feet. You noticed her swollen belly under a tunic of an opaque fabric that resembled a seal skin. The table was silent as the other women stared at you, some unsettled by those words, others eager to hear your reply.
Alyssa grabbed her plate and was going to walk around the table to reach your side, but you saw the look in her eyes, a quiet plead for you to not listen to the provocations, but you were just tired of that and decided to ignore the advice.
– If you’re going to say that I don’t belong to this kingdom and I have no right to be here – you took your plate from the table – Save your words, because I myself agree with you.
The selkie frowned: whatever she wanted to hear from you, it wasn’t those words.
– What?
You sighed.
– Do you really think one would choose to live in a place where their people are not welcome? – you looked around – Would someone here do something like that?
The woman bit her lip, but kept her composure.
– Whether you chose to come here or not, it’s good that you’re aware of this. You must be a careful girl.
You shrugged.
– Most of the times.
Alyssa, who finally stopped by your side, intervened.
– We’re not seeking for trouble, Melian – she spoke to the selkie – There’s no need for this conversation to carry on.
The other displayed a smile full of sharp, small teeth at your friend, but there was no sign of sympathy on her gaze.
– Why not? We’re having so much fun with it!
You spoke to bring her attention back to you.
– So, is there something you want to ask, or am I allow to leave? – you glanced at Alyssa – I need to take her back to her room.
Melian raised an eyebrow, as if thinking of a new provocation. But, as it uses to happen with people who are used to such things, she didn’t need much time to find one.
– You’re so worried about your human friend, but what about yourself? – and, inclining her head to the side in fake worry, – Don’t you need special care too?
– What?
– Oh, you’re pregnant, aren’t you? – Melian pointed at your ears – I can see you’ve already been with him, but were you able to do your part, or are you just like her, who needed a second trial to do the only thing she’s supposed to be good at?
Alyssa lowered her eyes, but said anything. You gritted your teeth: you could stand people talking at your back and despising you, but doing this with a friend was a different story.
You decided to speak out the truth and see what was going to happen.
– No, I’m not carrying a child and, heaven forbid, I will never do it!
A wave of shocked whispers spread among the girls.
“Is she unable to conceive?”
“Poseidon-sama didn’t touch her? Why did he bring her here, then?”
“Maybe he did touch her, but she didn’t get pregnant!”
“What if she refused to give him children? Can you imagine that?”
“Nonsense! Saying no to a god, and your husband? She could never...”
“If this was the case, she would certainly be punished, but she’s here, safe and sound!”
– Don’t listen to them – Alyssa whispered – They have nothing to do with this.
Melian, whose surprise hasn’t been completely hidden, still had some words for you.
– Is this some sort of punishment he gave you, or are you cursed? Why do you speak of your condition in such a cheerful manner?
– Because, to me, it’s a reason to cheer at – the firmness of your words silenced the whispers and made her swallow – When I was taken to my wedding night, I pleaded to our husband, asking him not to give me children… and he listened to me. I am able to conceive, but I didn’t wish to, so I begged him and got my request answered.
The air was heavy with that revelation. How dare you – was the question in each of the faces turned to you.
– I don’t believe you – Melian spoke between her teeth – If you did something like this, you should be dead.
– Yet, here I am – you hit back – Alive and not pregnant. What are you going to do about it?
The selkie gasped. Alyssa held your arm, as if begging you to leave the hall.
It was when a calm contralto voice raised in the room, and everyone turned to its direction.
– Melian, won’t you stop pestering the girl just because she did the very thing you wanted to do, but had no courage to?
The voice belonged to a woman with blue skin and fins on each side of her head, who was sitting on the same side of the table as Melian and somehow looked older than the women around her. You noticed that she was the only one who hasn’t raised her head to see the argument, but it didn’t mean that she wasn’t paying attention. You found it curious that, despite not having a prominent belly, her chair was positioned at a certain distance from the table.
The selkie turned to her, with a gaze that carried more nervousness than exasperation.
– Suriah, don’t start with your...
– Don’t you know our husband detests these kind of behavior? – the woman, Suriah, interrupted, unaffected – Besides, meal times are supposed to be pleasing, not a source of distress.
Melian’s skin turned pale with those words, less because of fear of the older wife than because of a non disguised anger.
The woman sighed and finally looked at you.
– You’re not just an inexperienced wife, as far as I can see, human – she started – You also know little about dealing with gods, don’t you?
You swallowed. You remembered that Poseidon himself said something similar to you.
– You could say that.
Suriah laughed.
– It’s pretty obvious, judging by the fact that you didn’t just plead to him… – she raised the spot on her face where there would be an eyebrow if she had hair – You tried to negotiate with him, didn’t you?
You gasped. How did she know?
– This type of thing might work among your people, but with gods, specially with someone like Poseidon-sama, things are quite different – she explained – He might have conceded you the favor you wanted, but what he asked from you in return… I suppose it made you shiver.
You didn’t reply.
– You don’t need to be so shy about it – she assured you – There are others like you around here, and they know what it’s like to be in such position. Our husband indeed loves us, but he doesn’t get along with rebel women. In this sense, Melian is in a better place than you.
Melian, who was still in silence, lowered her eyes at those words.
You, from your part, wanted to leave that place and forget about this unsettling conversation at first, but your curiosity, as well as the fact that you needed to gather information, overcame this urge, and you stood there.
– Suriah, right? – she nodded positively at your question – You seem to have experience in matters with gods. Can you tell me more?
Suriah seemed satisfied with your request.
– Of course I can, and I’m going to make things easier for you to understand by telling my own story. When I first came here, I knew the basics about my future husband and the life that awaited me, yet I think that if I knew more, I would never get into this situation – she sighed – Just like you, I wasn’t willing to carry children, so I begged for his favor, he gave it to me… But with a price.
You sensed a tension spreading among the women when the word price reached their ears. Suriah ignored this and carried on with the story.
– There’s a certain game, very popular among the gods, which I won’t bother to describe to you. I should learn the rules in one week and play one time with a subordinate of Proteus-sama, who’s a master at it. The result would determine if my request would be answered: if I won, I wouldn’t be impregnated that year; otherwise, I would have a child for each mistake during the game… every year.
You gasped.
– Every year? – your voice trembled – How is this possible?
Suriah chuckled, not refusing an explanation.
– The physiology of my people is such that allows us to endure multiple pregnancies. If I make love once, I will have one child. If it happens more times, consecutively, I will have the equivalent number of children. This is precisely what I bargained with Poseidon-sama: no child, or the number of my mistakes. And I lost.
You swallowed, but found the courage to ask what you had in mind.
– And how many mistakes you made?
The woman revealed the reason why her chair was distant from the table: she had a basket with lilac eggs on her lap. An unsettling wave of whispers spread among the girls when she raised the basket, and Melian slowly sat down. You couldn’t take your eyes off the basket’s interior, but found yourself unable to count the eggs: you only knew that they were many.
Answering the question you didn’t make, Suriah spoke:
– There are fifteen eggs here – she looked at them with affection – Fifteen beautiful children waiting to be born. Just as there were fifteen of them last year, and there will be in the next one.
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mysteryshoptls · 2 years
Text
SSR Lilia Vanrouge Club Wear Voice Lines
Just a reminder that Club Wear Lilia does not have a personal story!
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When Summoned: When it comes to music, everyone's free to do as they wish. Don't sweat the hard stuff, and just enjoy the music ♪
Summon Line: Kufufu, my bass is itching for the excitement... I'll make sure everyone gets amped up during tonight's show!
Groooovy!!: I'll give you a shout out during our next performance. You best be looking forward to it!
Home: I'm getting pumped up!
Home Idle 1: I received a terrible grade on my last music exam... That instructor still has much to learn. I cannot believe he was not able to handle my music sense.
Home Idle 2: Kalim has a pretty good sense of rhythm. It's probably because he is well versed in many of the Scalding Sands' instruments. He's worth teaching all I know.
Home Idle 3: Don't you think this pop music club T-shirt is just adorable? We're super proud of how it came out, with the logo Cater created, and the illustration that Kalim and I drew up.
Home Idle - Login: We've got a fine group of guys in our club. Don't you think we should have gotten scouted by now?
Home Idle - Groovy: If you also join the pop music club, you'll get to snag a few snacks that I definitely recommend. Cater and Kalim don't seem to like them, though.
Home Tap 1: If we're to play a gig outside, I'd prefer it to be a night-time show. It's a little rough for me to do a whole musical performance under the blazing sun.
Home Tap 2: I only recently started playing music. I never used to have any free time back in the old days. Think of it like a post-retirement hobby.
Home Tap 3: Our activity room just is a regular classroom, because we're only a club and so we aren't allowed to use the music room. If only they'd give us a room more suited for loud noises, then we could really raise the roof.
Home Tap 4: I'm pretty good at coaxing babes to sleep. Whenever I sing them a lullaby, they quickly calm down and drift off.
Home Tap 5: If you're interested in learning how to play an instrument, let me teach you. Kufufu... would you rather a kind and easy lesson, or hard and strenuous training?
Home Tap - Groovy: Four-piece bands are pretty cool, too... Oh, I know! Why don't you join us for one show? You can be our vocalist, if you want.
Duo: [LILIA]: Cater, think you can keep up? [CATER]: I'm picking up the beat, Lilia-chan!
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Requested by @rotattooill and Feli
447 notes · View notes
nota1eks · 6 months
Note
If/when they create a phm movie, what changes (if any) would you like to see them make to the story?
Jesus that’s a hard question…wow…! In a perfect world, they’d change nothing. It’d be a TV show with lots of room to portray everything. But we don’t live in a perfect world. I, therefore, want to keep as much of the original book as possible. My only immediate want is that it might be cool for them to use “they” for Rocky instead of “he”. Maybe some toning down of the Crazy Russians stereotyping, though if they do it right, that can be great. Nothing else comes to mind that I want changed -- it's a very good book.
But with that out of the way, let's talk about stuff that will very likely be cut. Because I think that's very interesting...
I think, as with Pathfinder getting fried and the dust storm in the Martian (2015) (wherein, both times, a huge plot event in the movie was gotten rid of for time purposes, with little impact on the overall plot, but a devastating-ish loss to the dedicated novel-enjoyers), some stuff will get cut out. Let's go one by one through the timeline of events:
The flashbacks will be there. Maybe not in flashback form (maybe they come before the rest like in the Martian...though those aren't flashbacks it's just backstory), but nonetheless there. Not everything will be there, though. Stratt barging in on Grace's class will be there; him doing the first experiments on astrophage will likely be there; meeting the crew will be there along with some of him training them so as to explain how he learned so much about being an astronaut; the explosion at Baikonur and the proceeding chaos will be there, trailer meetings included; but I think that'd be roughly it. They'll add some; they'll take away a lot. No Steve Hatch; no Lamai; probably very little Lokken (which is very sad); no frenchscientistwhosenameicantrememberimnotevenarealphm fanomllllll, either. They'll have their stories be explained via Grace talking to Rocky. Lots will be explained via Grace talking to Rocky.
Now, they'll have to have Grace waking up and seeing his dead crewmates. They'll have to have Ryan Gosling wandering about this spaceship scratching his head. That's a big part of the story. But I think after a certain point, after enough clues are gathered together, they'll infodump on us. It will be done well, of course, I mean just look at who's making the movie, but it wil lhaev to be like that. Maybe the nannybot will give him information. Maybe there will be a "Here to save Earth from imminent apocalypse? Click here ->" type of thing, but it won't be Grace turning to the camera and saying "Hey guys! I'm here at Tau Ceti to save Earth from astrophage! There's this weird ship out there. Keep you updated! Like and subscribe!"; nor will it be a voiceover. I had a Media Arts teacher in school and he told us that, more than anything, we were to avoid having to use voice-overs to explain out movies. At all costs. So I doubt they'll use that here -- maybe later, though. More talking-head with visuals than voiceover explaining the story.
Now. With Grace meeting Rocky there will either be nothing cut or everything cut: Maybe Rocky wil have a Magic Language Machine. Maybe Grace has a Magic Language Machine. Maybe they do everything how they did it in the book. Either way, it'll have to likely be one or the other. I'm very excited to see how they do Rocky's voice. An adaptation of the Audible Audiobook's version would be ideal, as I and many others think. There aren't many other good options... With the rest, I'm genuinely not sure. I can see them going both ways with this: cutting everything and rewriting it or keeping it pretty book-accurate. By any measure, they won't cut it all out. That'd be stupid.
With the in between between the Blip-A-Hail Mary disconnection and them arriving at Adrian, much will be cut out. It'll be rewritten. For better or for worse. Since it's just that theoretical, I'm not sure what changes I'd even want to see. Maybe some more back story on Rocky's crewmates? On Adrian (the eridian)? I mean Grace asking Rocky about Adrian would be a great opportunity to get some backstory in, btu the movie will already be so chock-full of it that I don't know if they'll be able to fit it in amongst everything else.
The Adrian Incident will likely still be very, very similar. It's the emotional peak of the movie. Rocky will nearly die. I will watch my friends weep, crying about how I should have warned them, and I will tell them they should have read the book. With Grace trying to save Rocky...eeh...it might be there; it might not. Flip of the dice with the landscape of the table being what the rest of the plot looks like, if that makes sense.
Now......The Great Taumeoba Escape. It's a lot like Pathfinder and the Dust Storm. It's just not all that relevant! SO MUCH is happening in the book at this point that -- I don't think -- they would be able to fit this in, even with a TV show with half a dozen hours to show the story in. I'd much rather lose this than lose backstory or silly goofy Rocky details.
The journey back, though, along with the breeding of Taumeoba was so boring it was cut out in the book. No way they'll have it in the movie. Probably even more will be cut out. Maybe one single Eureka! scene where Grace and Rocky drink vodka and wear crystals, respectively, but no more.
Now...The Great Taumeoba Escape 2: Radiation Exposure Boogaloo will NOT be cut out. Lest I stomp out of that movie theatre shouting insults at the directors etc. I kid, but not by a lot. They have to have this in order for Grace to turn around. I also bet they'll delay Grace learning he was a coward until here. It'd work so well there, yeah!? So he does his little thing, then turns around. From here, I think everything will be to-the-book. But let's talk about the ending.
Grace being a teacher is fundamental to the story. He can't not be, or the book/movie just won't work. Now, in The Martian (2015) they changed the ending. But that's not big, really. Mark becomes a recluse who gets looped back into being an astronaut training people who will then work on Artemis versus him being a teacher -- there's not that big of a plotline difference there. And we can pretend that in the interim he was a recluse. BUT IF THEY DON'T MAKE GRACE A TEACHER I SWEAR TO GOD--! calm. be calm. Anyways, him teaching again is a huge end for his character arc. And Rocky wil come in, no doubt, and tell Grace Earth's back to normal. Sending him back off to Earth just doesn't work, plot-wise or logic-wise.
Here's my last want: Earth. I want to see Earth back in shape. I want to see Stratt looking happy in her jail cell, etc.
Christ, I just wrote a lot. Um. I hope that answers your question...? And if it doesn't, feel free to ask me! I can -- and gladly will -- talk about this book all the livelong day!
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Wait, is it true the writers said Marinette and Gabriel are meant to represent individual creative spirit versus corporate greed?
Taken from the writer's commentary on the final two episodes
In the next scene, we can see Marinette taking the miraculous that have been standardised and industrialised by Gabriel and putting them back in shape. The writers specify that this is a parabole about craftsmanship vs industrial production. The miraculous will now be adapted to every person, but we can’t see what they look like just yet! In this new world, the powers are all shared, among people who they trust and know will work for the common good. They joke that the "Avengers" shot at the end with all the heroes is something they’d been dreaming of.
There's also that bit from her confrontation with Gabriel where he randomly acts like he's The God of Fashion (taken from S5E20):
Gabriel: I don't think you understand, child, so let me put things differently. Life is like fashion. You think you have a choice, but all you have is the illusion of choice. And I decide what choices are given to you. Marinette: You're wrong! (Shows Gabriel her sketchbook.) Fashion is about listening to people, it's about understanding who they are, what excites them and creating the clothes that will help them express their inner world. Help them connect with others and make their dreams come true. Gabriel:(Laughs and takes her sketchbook, then browses its pages.) No, that's not fashion. That's making dresses for your dolls. Fashion is a product, a marketing strategy, an industry that relies on uninterrupted trend renewal that forces you to either throw away everything you have and buy more or, worse, to be out of fashion. Thanks to the clothes I create, the celebrities who wear them, the advertisements I design and the Alliance rings that broadcast them, I create an idyllic vision. A perfection that everyone aspires to achieve, while keeping it just out of their grasp. You finally understand the difference, don't you? You listen to people's desires and create what they want. Somehow, people make you. Whereas I create people's desires. They buy what I decide to buy. They think what I want them to think. I'm the one who makes people. You think you love Adrien, but you're just under the spell of this world I've created. A world where Adrien is the star, shining high above. A world where you're just part of the crowd below looking up at him. (Shuts the sketchbook.) That is why nothing can ever happen between you two.
So, yeah, this is apparently supposed to be them talking about some kind of central theme of individual creators vs mass production? The problem is that it basically comes out of nowhere. If the writers really wanted to have this be some sort of message, then they needed to establish this a lot sooner because Marinette has had no issues with his fashion company nor has anyone else.
An example of a way to do this would be to have Marinette win the hat competition in season one, Adrien models it in season two, and then give us a series of episodes where Marinette gets to learn about the production process for her hat. She gets to see it mass produced and then gets to learn how fast fashion works and, by the end, she's no longer a fan of the fashion industry even though she still loves fashion. It would be a much better environmental message then the nonsense we've been given, too.
But the show didn't give us anything like that. We've never seen a single Gabriel brand product save for the stuff Adrien wears and the alliance rings, which are phones more than fashion accessories, so it makes sense that they'd have a uniform look. Even if phones were made to order, you wouldn't see much variety in the base product save for color. The customization on a phone is the background and the alliance lets you customize your "background" (aka your Adrien, Lila, or Kagami) as we saw in Jubilation when Socqueline was showing off her alliance.
Side note: I realized that Jubilation takes place before I started writing mini episode reviews, so I wanted to make a quick note of how creepy it is that you can customize your alliance avatar given who the avatars are. Gabriel and Tomoe seriously took their 14-year-olds and told people of all ages to treat them like dolls, which is extra creepy given how many fans Adrien has. That has some messed up in-universe implications that make me shudder. What were the writers thinking?
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snootlestheangel · 6 months
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COD AU Ideas
Yup, just a big list of AU ideas I've had rattlin' around in the ole brain. I may not ever get around to doing something with most of these. Some might be very thought out and others a simple sentence of a concept. These are all my concepts, so have the expectation that these will eventually become my fics.
I'm unsure right now if any of these will turn into actual works, cause goodness knows I already have too much on my plate right now, BUT for the most part, what I put here is/will be what to expect if I actually do something with them. In other words, these will serve as "fic descriptions" but just for fics that may never come to be.
The first one I didn't include a "fic" description just cause it's such a niche AU and I really want to inspire others to write their own stuff for it. So please let me know if you want my idea for the work!
Anyways, here's some brain rot!
Prison Break AU
SoapGhost AU where they're both in prison and plan an escape together. Based simply on the idea of "We escaped prison together, and oops we fell in love along the way". SO MUCH angst potential, so much comedy potential, so much potential!!!!
I'll definitely do something with it one day, but we don't have any of these bad boys (that I'm aware of) so please ask me/tag me if you want to write a Prison Break/Prison AU of our boys!!! Like, a Prison AU is a phenomenal idea why have I not heard of anything like this existing already???
Cryptid Hunters AU
AU in which Task Force 141 is actually an entire section of the modern military dedicated to controlling/monitoring the cryptid/monster populations of the world. Sometimes this means killing really rare/dangerous ones. Would contain PriceNik (subject to change into including Graves), SoapGhost, GazAlex.
It's the 141 boys just hunting cryptids with the help of Shadow Company (the North American version), Kate Laswell, and a few others. *honestly not my favorite AU, most likely to be forgotten about*
Cryptid Hunters AU but a bit to the left
Same concept as before but Ghost is a cryptid himself. Ghost still acts like a normal dude, and is a part of the 141 because they're actually super helpful for him, as a powerful cryptid-most-likely-ancient-deity. Helpful because they remove competition/keep most cryptids under check. But not helpful cause they stress him out, they want to find The Ghost and put "it" down cause it's apparently super dangerous.
He's a modern cryptid, meaning stories about his cryptid-self are recent (last like 20 years), which makes him that much more terrifying. He's actually one of the most notorious English cryptids; known for his abilities to phase in and out of shadows, creating pillars of solidified black sand, changing his size from massive to incredibly small, and causing incredibly vivid hallucinations of deceased loved ones. He earned the name Ghost cause of those hallucinations and how he often appears like the ghost of a person long deceased. Cue SoapGhost happening and lots of angst potential with that. Also so much comedy cause they're all like "Damn Ghost was spotted again" and he has to act surprised by what they find when they investigate the area. Soap openly defending the entity of Ghost by saying that he's "never killed anyone! 'Sides we should study him and learn about him! He's probably the only one of his kind, ya know!" Ghost falling in love with the strange little human that looks in awe at the massive structures Ghost makes with his crystalized black sand. Ghost intentionally making them more intricate as time goes on, letting himself get spotted in his full "demonic" form cause the excitement and borderline insane curiosity on Soap's face is always worth it. Now this?? This is good shit that I really want to write now
Soap is a Healer AU
Can't think of a good concise thing to call this AU so lemme explain! Soap who is part of a small percentage of people that possess unique abilities. Their designed to "heal souls" so to speak. People with lots of baggage in their lives often seek out the comfort of these "healers" because they can genuinely help them "heal" from all of this. Part of this means helping them move on from the loss of loved ones, like friends and family, or even pets. This means they can see ghosts of people that someone is still attached to. It's not the ghosts being attached to the people, it's the living not wanting to/struggling to move on. Healers can interact with a person's ghost(s) and vice versa, which is often how they help people move on.
Make it SoapGhost though where "Healers" shouldn't be in the military. There's been too many that have gone insane themselves from all the pain and misery they see/feel/experience on a daily basis. Even if they never see a battlefield, they're constantly surrounded by those who have and it's a miserable experience. Healers in these positions often take their own lives because "they couldn't save everyone" and it eventually became incredibly difficult for a Healer to get to where Soap is. But Soap's identity as a Healer is known by like maybe 3 people, Price not included. And he's not got the true "Healer" personality: he's not quite as empathetic and self-sacrificing as people like his mum, so he's doing just fine where he is.
Then he meets Ghost and suddenly all that changes. He suddenly meets someone he knows he needs to "heal" because damn. He sees the Riley family: Ghost's mum, Tommy and Beth, Joseph, and even Roach. Soap slowly winning Ghost over with the help of the Riley family. Soap slowly helping Ghost move on, helping to convince Ghost that Roach is gone, it's okay to love someone else, Ghost realizing Soap is "Healer" and getting upset that he's just "using" Ghost or whatever the fuck, Soap having to convince him that he fell in love with him, not that he's trying to heal him because it's what Soap is, but because he loves him. Soap saying he fell in love when he realized how many years had passed since the Riley family's passing, how unusual it is for people to have such strong "ghosts" after more than 5 years, saying he fell in love because it means Ghost is such a deeply caring, loving person. He fell in love because often times the "ghosts" in a person's life just continue on like nothing happened, and seeing the way they love Simon, seeing the way little Joseph just adores his uncle, everything about Simon Riley made Soap fall in love.
Undercover AU
This one's a GazAlex AU actually!
Literally what it sounds like. The two have to work together as an undercover duo, often times pretending to be a couple, as they help track down a big bad. Lot of flustered Alex caused by Gaz simply ~existing~. So many cliche tropes in this bad boy. The "there was only one bed", the "make out in an alley to avoid getting caught", the "pretending to be married".
Just a lot of Gaz being the coolest, most badass mf-er to exist and Alex trying desperately to keep things "professional" between them and failing miserably. Gaz being confident and using it to make Alex even more flustered cause "heh, he's kinda cute when he's all red and embarrassed". Gaz knowing full well the crisis he's giving Alex like 90% of the time, but not pushing Alex out of his comfort zone cause it's clear Alex likes him but doesn't want to compromise anything about their mission.
So much silly goofy potential with this, but also like some genuine good shit. Also Laswell and Price being older, "wiser" gays just laughing at the two dancing around each other.
Definitely going to be a fic once I finish one of my current WIPs. This either means posting all the YouTuber AU drabbles I have in my drafts or the last 4 chapters of my Left4Dead AU. Probably the latter...
Anyways, feel free to ask questions about these AUs! I'd love to get an excuse to share more of my brain rot!
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