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#i was looking at david like i know you why do i know you
ken-dom · 3 days
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The Stars Look Very Different Today
∘₊✧ Ryland Grace solo fic
2.5k words
∘₊✧ Summary: The computer has a new command for Ryland — one he’s extremely relieved to carry out.
∘₊✧ Author’s notes: I’m barely half way through the book and I’m so in love with Ryland already. My god. Anyway this obviously got me into researching some of the hornier aspects of space travel, potentially unlocked a new kink along the way, and this is where I ended up. If you’re as curious as I am about the topic of this fic, you might enjoy this Vice article and also this Mauden article!
Title from Space Oddity by David Bowie, suggested by the wonderful @heresthestorymorningglory who encouraged me endlessly with this fic, as always!
∘₊✧ Warnings/content: NSFW, Project Hail Mary spoilers!, masturbation, if you squint it’s kinda Ryland x Computer — and it’s kinda forced masturbation but he definitely wants to do it so take it as you wish, premature ejaculation, written from Ryland’s POV in keeping with the novel, horny Ryland, mentions of porn, low key science kink, and my favourite tag ever: cumming in space! 🪐🛸💦
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‘Ejaculate.’
The voice has become familiar to me over the last few days. Almost comforting at times, if not a little on the unsettling side. But hey, unsettling isn’t the worst thing a person can be, right? Or a computer, if we’re being technical. Which I suppose we should be.
I blink my eyes open, groggy from what I’m guessing was a relatively short period of sleep before I check the analogue clock on the wall to confirm it. I don’t think on it for too long, however, because my attention is pulled to the heat I can feel pooling in my gut, and the throbbing sensation in my… between my legs. It’s untimely, but expected.
I’ve found myself with this little problem upon waking up for the third time in a row, now. The previous times, I’ve ignored it, willed it away while trying to keep my mind on everything else I’m still adjusting to rather than wasting my time… enjoying myself a little too much. 
This time, though, it seems the ship knows and wants me to do something about it.
I obviously haven’t heard correctly. My inconveniently timed arousal must be playing on my mind. It has been a while since I… no, that’s irrelevant right now, I’m giving in but I need to focus.
Why would the computer instruct me to-
‘Ejaculate.’
There it is again, plain as day this time. Yup. The computer wants me to… ejaculate.
Despite being completely alone, lightyears away from another living human, I feel incredibly exposed all of a sudden.
I gradually sit up and look around the room, rubbing at my tired eyes, careful not to cause any friction that might exacerbate matters. One of the robot arms is waiting patiently at the other side of the small room, holding out a little plastic cup, which I presume I am supposed to deposit my offering into. And then, what? Give it back to put into safe storage? Or eject it out into space where it’ll crystallise and float forever as evidence of my deed, only for some alien to discover and analyse a hundred years from now and take back to his home planet with breaking news. ‘Sex seed found among the stars, Earth astronaut got too excited about space travel.’
Sex seed? Jeepers.
Maybe, more likely, they’ll keep it to repopulate in the event of this whole thing not working out, or-
Ok. Let me think this through a little more scientifically.
Why would I need to ejaculate right now? What’s different about this time to the previous times I’ve woken up with a raging erection straining against my uniform?
‘Ejaculate.’
‘Just give me a moment, please?’ I reply, irritable, and the computer does not answer. The robot arm remains, though, and I know I will be given no choice in this.
Is that ethical? 
Whatever. I don’t think I need to get caught up in the semantics of whether one can consent to a spacecraft computer asking for one’s semen, robot arms or not. And after all, in the words of the wise Beyoncé, I woke up like this.
So, back to the question. If it’s not for repopulation purposes, perhaps… ah! Of course! It’s for my own good! The computer is trying to make sure I stay healthy.
Masturbation has been proven to lower anxiety levels and stress. This is a high-pressure sort of situation after all. Maybe it thinks I need a little relaxation to be able to focus properly, or to keep my blood pressure levels well maintained?
That’s the stuff. I’m really getting the ball rolling now.
I remember a study I read, and realise that actually, the fact that it’s been a while is actually important here, too, and not just a distraction my body insists on.
Infrequent ejaculation can result in prostatitis, and the way to avoid the secretions and subsequent bacteria growth that cause the condition, is to ejaculate. Frequently.
The computer has either noticed my recent arousal levels; the higher heart rate, the dilated pupils, the change in blood flow to cause certain… swellings, and let’s face it, the scent of desperation I must be giving off after this long without an orgasm, and thinks I’m overdue an ejaculation or two… or, it’s programmed to encourage masturbation at set intervals with frequent ejaculation in mind as a necessary tool to health.
In honesty, I started to lose my erection when the first of all these thoughts occurred to me – nothing like a computer and a robot arm teaming up to persuade you to rub one out for them to kill the mood – but… mmh…
Listen, I know I can get a little… carried away with science, but I really am alone out here and I don’t think the computer is at all concerned with what gets me going. It just wants me to cum in a cup. I can do that. I think.
I retrieve the cup from the robot arm, which folds away, patiently waiting for me to return with the goods, no doubt.
‘Don’t look, okay?’ I say a little weakly, feeling my cheeks heat up. I know it’s a computer, but it knows things. Too much, almost, and I feel watched. I’ve never been into that, being watched. Nothing against it, but I much prefer to do this with my curtains closed and my doors locked, preferably in a darkened room, or the shower. Since I can’t be afforded these luxuries aboard the Hail Mary, the least I can ask for is the computer not to look.
It doesn’t answer me, of course. I didn’t really expect it to, but at least with whatever else it gathers about me, it’ll know I’m not enjoying it’s presence while I knock one out for it.
Who knows, maybe over time, we’ll get to know one another and the computer’s presence will be the only way I can jerk off. Maybe it’ll start talking me though it… would dirty talk be programmed incase of difficulty… getting into it?
I chuckle softly, knowing that liking the computer is a real possibility. Doll syndrome, it’s called. I’d start preferring the computer to a real living, breathing human. Or maybe there’s another syndrome specifically for the preference of a computer…
But I’m letting myself get distracted again.
Back to the matter at hand. Ha!
I sit back down on my bed, my erection pressed painfully against my uniform trousers now, as I consider the little plastic cup. By the look of it, it holds about 100mls. The average ejaculate is around 1.25-5mls, and from experience I tend to fall somewhere in the middle of that range, so it’s extremely unlikely I’ll fill it, but it really has been so long, the fleeting thought passes through my mind that it won’t be big enough.
Then my thoughts switch to how this is all so clinical and not at all sexy. I guess that’s another kink I might be missing out on, but before I can get carried away again, the robot arm drops something else down for me.
Oh. It’s a dirty magazine. The sort they keep on the top shelf, hidden behind more family friendly editions like House and Home or Celebrity Chat or whatever people read these days.
A pair of breasts almost knock me clean out as the magazine drops into view before me. The robot arm flicks through the thin, glossy pages and holds it open at a page of a woman with her legs spread, glistening folds displayed beautifully as if just for me.
But she’s not real. Looking at the image only reminds me that I’m alone, and whilst her aroused state and thoughts of how she might pleasure herself does make my cock twitch, my heart sinks a little that I’ll never feel another wet pussy.
‘No thank you,’ I choke out, slightly reluctant, and the robot arm switches to a magazine it was apparently holding behind the one with the pretty vagina photograph.
This one displays an image of a thick, handsome penis, uncut and leaking at the tip, fingers ghosting over the happy trail above…
‘No, that’s not the issue,’ I say, a little high pitched, because my cock is leaking now too, and I know I’m not going to make it to the cup if they keep showing me images like this.. ‘I just… I can manage on my own, thank you.’
Still, I feel a little disappointed when the robot arm takes that enticing cock away, too, and I’m left truly alone once again.
I let out a long breath, as even as I can muster. I need to get out of my head.
I close my eyes, breathing deeply. I focus on the ache between my legs. I think about taking my time, really enjoying the sensation of touching myself in space – and the thought that I’m actually in space, does it for me again. With an involuntary pulse of my cock, I feel a thick drop of pre-ejaculate form at the tip.
Take my time? Who am I kidding.
Clasping the cup securely in one hand, I slip the other over the crotch of my trousers and the strangled noise that escapes me would’ve been enough to wake the whole neighbourhood had I been back home on Earth.
I feel a rush of shame flood my senses, but then I remind myself that I can be as loud as I want here. In space, no one can hear you moan. I laugh again, feeling giddy. This is kind of exciting, actually. The thought that I’m alone is finally working for me, and without overthinking it any further, I tear open the fastening on my trousers and let my cock spring free.
I’m so hard it’s painful, visibly throbbing, angry red tip shining with pre-cum. Begging to be touched.
I realise as I stare down at my neglected equipment that words like cum and cock aren’t usually so easily thrown around in my vocabulary, and that I must be unusually horny – another word I tend to shy away from until the moment calls for it – to be thinking like this.
I bite my lips together, anticipating how it might feel.
I’ve never done this in space before. It must be ok to do it, otherwise the computer wouldn’t expect me to just get on with it, ‘reading’ material included, but what if it feels different? What if it hurts?
I tentatively raise a trembling hand and carefully drag a featherlight fingertip up the underside, base to tip, tracing a thick vein and collecting some pre-cum on the way.
I squirm, moaning loudly. I wonder if the computer has really shut its ears off, or if it’s simply programmed to know the difference between horny, desperate groaning and other types of sounds, like real pain or distress.
Whatever, I need more. Fuck.
I suck my finger clean and do it again. A gentle fingertip ghosting up the hot flesh and my body jolts upright.
I’m not gonna last more than a few seconds, and I know it.
It turns out that for whatever reason, touching yourself in space feels fucking incredible.
I lose track of most of my thoughts after that, feeling like I’ve transformed into some sort of rabid animal.
I slump backwards, spreading my legs, and my hand wraps around my shaft, immediately pumping furiously as a broken string of growls and roars rip from my throat.
I barely have time to remember the cup, but somewhere in the haze of unbridled bliss, my lizard brain must have kicked in at just the right moment because only instinct could have given me the sense to raise my other hand and position the cup to catch the insane amount of ejaculate I release as I writhe on the sheets.
Some of it dribbles down over my fingers, but it doesn’t matter, as long as I deposit some in the provided receptacle, I suppose, the computer will be satisfied.
It seems to drag on for a while, this release. Not that I’m complaining; it feels so good I wouldn’t be able to comprehend words enough to form an actual complaint at this moment, even if I wanted to. But as climaxes go, this one, long and intense and oh, so delicious, is up there with the best.
I shakily place the cup (around 7-10mls not including what I didn’t catch – that has to be some sort of record for me) onto the floor and roll over, curling into a ball, my softening cock twitching through aftershocks of pleasure as every muscle in my body relaxes me into another round of sleep.
I wake up five hours later, sprawled on my back with my cock out, still soft for now, and my hand sticky. It must have worked. I must have needed it.
Slowly, I sit up again, tucking my co- my penis back in. Making myself presentable. I am in uniform, after all. I reach up to smooth my hair down. It’s a mess, and there are loose strands stuck to my forehead. I’ll deal with that later.
I notice the cup of ejaculate has gone, collected by my trusty pal, the porno robot arm, and a little sink has been revealed from behind its wall panel.
The computer isn’t going to instruct me to clean myself up – it’s giving me that dignity at least, but it’s pointing me in the right direction. And it’s correct.
I stand on shaky legs to head over there, feeling a slight headrush.
Hopefully, the computer will never speak of it again-
‘Thirty-seven seconds.’
‘Until what?’ I ask, too relaxed to care very much, as I soap up my semen-coated palm.
‘Thirty-seven seconds to produce 7.8mls of semen.’
My cheeks burn. It timed me? And I couldn’t even last out a whole minute?
Did computers care about premature ejaculation as much as humans seem to? Is it even premature when you’re only trying to pleasure yourself?
‘Yeah, well, it’s been a while,’ I retort, sheepish but clearly irked. ‘A long while.’
No further comment from the computer. Great.
I know it’s time for me to get on with the thousand other things occupying my time on this ship, so I do. But the nagging thought I couldn’t shake as I observed the beetles told me that I had to prove the computer wrong about my stamina.
I can last.
And apparently, the thought of proving the computer wrong about my own masturbation habits was doing it for me and-
‘Mmhhnnn-’
That delicious friction against my sensitive cock in these pants was tormenting me. And I thought cock not penis so I must be horny again. Does space travel typically cause high levels of arousal?
Fuck it. It doesn’t matter.
‘Computer, you got another cup? You can watch this time. I’m gonna put on a real show for you.’
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dedalvs · 11 hours
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Is there something up with the High Valyrian wiki?
https://wiki.languageinvention.com/index.php?title=High_Valyrian_language
I've had this link bookmarked since ages. I can't seem to load the page. I've tried all sorts of browsers and it is still not working. i wanted to get back into actively learning HV again and duolingo is kinda annoying so. Is there a different page/resource the wiki has moved on to? I also seem to recall an old forum for HV with a bunch of really good resources for it. is it possible for you to provide a link? Thanks so much anyway!!
Good question! This wiki, which you can find here..
...is a labor of love—not just from me, but from a team of dedicated individuals who want to get information about my languages up somewhere more or less permanent, editable by many, and all in one place.
For years I have had a hosting plan from DreamHost. For a fixed fee, DreamHost allows you, essentially, infinite storage. I've got a dozen or so websites hosted by the same DreamHost account. I have to pay for the urls (a yearly fee; everyone pays these), but the hosting itself is covered, no matter if I had one website or a hundred.
Creating a wiki that would function like Wiktionary was my idea. I love Wiktionary, and love the idea behind it. For example, let's say you wanted to look up mate. This is an English word. It's also a subjunctive form of matar "to kill" in Spanish. It's also the word for "saliva" in Swahili. It's also "dead" in Tahitian. It's also a word in several other languages. It's kind of cool to take an abstract form—going just by spelling—and seeing that it's a word in a bunch of different languages, all with different etymologies (some related, of course. For example, mate has something to do with death in a lot of Oceanic languages. In Hawaiian it's make, which looks like an entirely different English word!).
In Dothraki, the word tor is the number four. It comes from Proto-Plains *tur (and so would be tur in Lhazareen). It's also the word for "tower" in Hen Linge (this is one of the words coined by Andrzej Sapkowski, not created by me). In Noalath, from The Shannara Chronicles, it's the word for "wolf", and in Shiväisith, the language I created for the Dark Elves from Thor: The Dark World, it's the word for "sword". While it's true I didn't create the Hen Linge word, I created the others, so you can see it's a form I'm fond of, where the shape is possible.
Anyway, that's kind of cool! And that was the point of the site.
As it happens, the High Valyrian section of the site is…massive. To give you an idea, at the moment, the wiki has over 220,000 pages. Most of those are High Valyrian pages. This is because there's a dedicated team for High Valyrian that has added pages for every single noun, adjective, and verb inflection for every existing word on the wiki. To give you an idea, every verb of High Valyrian has around 200 forms (ipradagon "to eat", ipradan "I eat", ipradā "you eat", ipradas "s/he/it eats", etc.). Every single form for every single verb has its own page. This was accomplished primarily with a program that populated the inflectional pages, but however they got there, they're there.
Certain things on the wiki are templates that need to go through and "check" every single page. Additionally, a webcrawler goes through and checks every single page on the wiki. This requires a lot of RAM. As a result, periodically, the entire website just...shuts down.
Obviously this is not cool. I asked DreamHost about it, and though we have infinite space, we don't have infinite RAM. The first step was to disable all web crawlers. You know about SEO, and how you can do things to increase the page rank of your site? Well, we needed to do the opposite. We needed to make the site disappear from the net, effectively. And we did. This is why even if you type "David J. Peterson wiki language invention" into Google you get nothing. It's like we don't exist. We're there, but you have to know we're there and go to the site specifically. That helped, but our own programs still shut things down.
The second step was to get a private server (technically a virtual private server) for the site. This cost me an extra $25 a month ($300 a year) from what I was already paying. This definitely helped, but sometimes things get to be a bit too much, and so the site still shuts down. This is what you experienced.
You know how Wikipedia begs you for money every year? It's because of this. It's one thing to create an awesome resource; it's another thing for people to actually use it.
Hosting already costs me about $250 every two years, and every year I renew the urls for about 15 websites, which is another $300 a year. If I upgrade the VPS to the next level, it's even more money every year. And that's just me paying it.
Right now, we're in an okay spot. The site shuts down every so often, but most of the time it's more or less stable. Unless I start making a lot more money regulary, that's the way it's going to stay.
So if you go to the site and it's down, I'm very sorry, but it will be back. May take a few days, but it'll come back (as long as I'm alive, anyway).
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tac-the-unseen · 1 day
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What the Lost boys think about vampire related media
Fluff, x reader but just barely
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•While making conversation with your four Vampire lovers you were suddenly plagued with a question.
“How do you guys feel about vampire related media?”
-That question was an immediate head turner. The cave goes dead quite before Dwayne speaks up, “Well…vampires are in hiding so…”
-This sparks a conversation about how media representation of vampires may not be accurate, but that's a good thing. “If a book or movie comes out and it is shockingly accurate to what being a vampire is really like, the creator isn't going to last long.” David explained
-That's because there's a set of rules vampires have to follow and one of those rules is to never publicly reveal your double life identity
-”If something like that comes out, that means a vampire has broken that rule OR somebody knows vampires very closely and is creating media they know shouldn't exist.”
-Turns out if a vampire breaks that rule it's basically open season to kill and destroy their creations.
•You turn the conversation and begin to ask how they, specifically, feel about certain vampire representation
•Bram Stoker's Dracula
-Dwayne is the first to buy in his opinion.
-Dwayne feels that while it is a cult classic and well written, The characters are exceedingly dumb.
-”Johnathan spends a ridiculous amount of time talking about other characters ‘Breasts’ and trying to figure out why his host climbs walls ‘like a lizard's.”
-David is the next one to speak up
-David thinks it's not really worth the read
-”Unless you're trying to brag to people there's no point in reading it.”
-”Also why was Mina talking to that old sailor so much?”
-Paul laughs as he remembers “how fucking crazy he wrote Dracula to be”
-”I'm pretty sure the real Dracula thinks it's a heinous crime against him”
-Paul hasn't read it but have heard enough about it to know even the more obscure references
-Marko comments on the graceful writing style and the beautiful descriptions
-”I've only read it because Dwayne thought I would like it"
-Marko also loves how oblivious Jonathan and most of the other characters are
-All of them think the movie adaptation is hilarious and love the shitty special effects
•Interview with a vampire
-Paul chimes in immediately
-”God it's so homo erotic it hurts…in a good way.”
-Paul thinks its a nice horror novel mixed with a weird cozy atmosphere
-Dwayne thinks it's another well written classic and He actually begins to rave about all the themes involved within Anne Rice’s work
-”It's a beautiful Gothic thriller with a deep, sadly comedic energy.”
-He even offers to read it too you sometime
-Marko chimes in quickly about “Claudia’s rebellious behavior and persona”
-”imagine watching your family choose somebody else over you. It's so deeply upsetting but to an understandable level.”
-”I would have hated to turn so young. I look like a teenager and other people can respect that to a certain point. But being five years old with the mind of an adult, No one would respect you.”
-Marko relates to Claudia on an internal level and loves unraveling her character. When you ask why he quickly responds "Some people call me a cherub... You think I enjoy that?"
-David says he doesn't have much to say other than it was a decent read (That's his version of a compliments)
•Twilight
-All of them agree that it's laughably horrendous
-Almost immediately at the same time they say “This is the skin of a killer Bella”
-This leads to banshee like laughter
David speaks up immediately
-”Why do you humans want us to sparkle so bad?”
-”I personally hate the idea of being a walking disco ball, but to each their own.”
-Marko chimes in quickly
-”Would you like it if we sparkled?” He asked while leans on you affectionately
-Marko thinks the only reason to read it is to have a nice laugh
-”Why did Edward have such a violent reaction of Bella standing by a fan? That makes no sense…like I have mates and I enjoy the smell of you guys but…I'm not nearly clawing off my face at your smell”
-”Yeah yeah, I get he's trying not to overreact but running out of class to get away is crazy.”
-Paul even adds that even thought it's very dumb even he can appreciate the message it's trying to said.
-”something something, coming over adversary, something something, love wins, something something..”
-”Also that Jacob imprinting on Bella's infant daughter is super fucking creepy.”
-when you asked Dwayne about his feels he scoffed and said It's insulting at best and borderline sexual harassment at worst.
-He refused to go into depth
•You thank them for humoring you and they tell you that it's no problem
-David kisses the side of your head in an uncharacteristically soft way “We don't ever mind answering your vampire related question.” He tells you
-Marko turns to you “But seriously do you want us to sparkle?”
-”I think I have some roll on body glitter somewhere..” Paul says while getting up to look for it
Thanks for reading <3
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totallynuwonhere · 3 days
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“Lazy Weekend”
-I’ve been deprived of sleepy soft David. So I figured I’d take matters into my own grubby hands. Also I needed a warm-up after being off writing for awhile
ALSO TO THOSE WHO DROPPED REQUESTS LIKE WAAAY BACK, I’LL GET TO THOSE, I PROMISE, school has just been eating me alive, but rest assured, I’ll get em done…eventually
Anyway, I hope you like it. And if it’s shit, then it probably is cuz it’s been awhile.
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It was an exhausting week to be Alpha, with the Pack getting booked more-and-more, along with having to navigate the whole Summit issues. This was the weekend he’d decided they’ll have a full day of relaxation. No work, no yard duty, and no unprompted calls from a certain Beta.
He had it all planned on his head, and by planned, he meant no advance planning, ‘he’d be going with the flow’. A thing he never does outside their bedroom endeavors, but he figured, why not branch out, give himself permission so let loose. But not after getting more shut eye. He let out a yawn, rolling over to wrap his arm around his mate.
“Angel?, what are you doing up..?” He asked.
“Oh! Morning Davey, I was gonna go for a run—“ They paused, looking to see their fiancé strong arm wrap around their waist.
“Erm…David?”
“Don’t go. Stay in bed with me.” He mumbled, eyes still barely open.
His mate snickered, slipping their fingers into his hair, earning them a relaxed hum from the shifter.
“My my, how the tables have turned.” They sneered.
“Shut up..you know you want to, lay back down and cuddle with me.” He said in an irritated tone he failed to maintain. Letting out a relaxed sigh as he felt his angel’s arm around him.
“What’s got you in a cuddly mood, hm?” They asked, nuzzling to his side, fingers returning to his hair.
“Mm…You’re comfy, that’s why.” He replied, his eyes closed, but a very noticeable smirk on his lips, catching his mate’s attention, and that they saw as an advantage to milk out just a little bit more David sappiness.
“Is that so? Well if it’s comfortable you’re seeking, couldn’t you just, bundle up under the covers so I could still go out for my run?”
David scoffed, opening his eyes to meet their sly smirk. “Seriously?”
They shrugged, never losing that shit eating grin he knew all too well.
“Fine. I want you to stay because, it’s not same without your cuddles, and I wanted to have a lazy weekend, and I wanted to do that by having my arms wrapped around you, while getting a few more hours of shuteye.” He replied, nuzzling into the crook of their neck, taking in there scent.
“Was that enough of a reason to make you stay?” He asked, his warm breath on his mate’s skin causing the sensation he had hope for as they laid on top him.
They smirked, looking down at his half lidded gaze, replying.
“How’s about you throw in a kiss, then I’ll consider.”
He laughed, his voice still hoarse from barely being awake.
“You’re such a fucking menace. Lean down here, asshole”
They pressed their lips against his, David’s arms wrapping around their waist as he kissed them, feeling the smirked still linger on their lips. They pulled away, resting their forehead against his, “Snot.” He mumbled, eyes still tired but his lips forming a soft smile before pressing another quick kiss onto the tip of their nose.
“Now can we go back to sleep?” He asked, immediately yawning as he did, earning a chuckle from his mate.
“Yeah, you win, let’s go back to sleep.”
They laid back next to him, nuzzling into his chest as he wrapped his arms around them.
“Thank you, Angel. I love you..”
He whispered, closing his eyes and letting sleep take over.
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typicalopposite · 3 days
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*paces the room*
So I just finished season 5!
So MUCH happened I swear going back to look at the episodes synopsis’ for this post I was like… wait that was in this season too?!? I stayed up ALL night TWICE watching this season because I just couldn’t turn it off! It’s crazy that people didn’t like this season (like vehemently didn’t like it at least on Reddit… BUT they say they don’t like s6 because its Buck centric and he “needs to be more of a background character” sooooo clearly I won’t read too into their nonsense)
ANYWAY this season is possibly one of my favorites! From the hackers the gps wrecks and tower scare, the zoo breakout (THE ZOO BREAKOUT OMG… THE ALPACAAAAAAAS! And Buck being scared LOL) to Jeffrey escaping and then Athena’s whole story line following! I was terrified for her and for Harry and ACK!!!!
Maddie’s PPD and leaving arc was so heartbreaking and frustrating at the same time! And I felt so bad for Chim (and Buck) and baby Jee!
OMG the homecoming parade crash and the mixup I was so Heartbroken for them! :(
Claudette… :/ hated her and her ending… but mostly her
Of course Lucifer (spn) shows up as an extremely bad guy but he wants to play dad of the year (ok the guy here at least is thinking of his kid more than himself… but still PARALLELS!)
MICHAEL AND DAVID! I hated to see them go! And that montage had me all teary eyed during one of my all nighters!
Toni’s little love story <3 and the girls from the oil spill! <3<3
Eddie’s panic attacks and leaving the 118 was so sad! But I get it… I also know he will be back because I came from season 7 *shrugs* so it wasn’t too sad, yanno?
I love that everyone still came together for Christmas tho, i was like poor Bobby and Athena </3
Madney reunion… sort of </3 but again…. I know how this ends lol. Also JJ and Kate reunion (criminal minds)
The kiss might be the one thing I truly disliked from the season because it doesn’t really do anything beyond being annoying.
WHY DOES EVERYONE USE BOBBY’S PAST AGAINST HIM WHEN THEY ARE ANGRYYYYYYYYYYYYY :(
Well I have a fear of sauna’s now (and stop signs… and exercising)
The mom that falls saving her daughters had me BAWLING!
Bobby and May’s relationship is everything to me! And ack I knew I didn’t like Jonah
I take back my original assumption of Buck having the worst luck. It’s Chimney. What the hell. Give this man a raise and a vacation… some amazing life insurance and some bubble wrap. How he is alive is beyond me!!
THE LAST EPISODE
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH <3
Toni getting married, and the drama about her missing Hen and Karen’s wedding. Buck’s face when Maddie texts Chim first. Bobby </3 was not ok, but EDDIE CAME THROUGH! And when he poured the whiskey out I was whooop whoooping out loud! THEN THE WEDDING I love Toni so much omg and everyone coming! PLUS no more Taylor :) hahahaha (sorry i just never liked her)
(Omg the maggots in the hair might have too the cake as the worst thing to happen… at least visually… for me)
SEASON SIX HERE I COME! You better be all about Buck like the pissy people on Reddit said you are! And y’all, send me strength for that mid season finale i have seen it dozens of times but this is gonna be different and I have never been so prepared to be unprepared for something in my life! O.o
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heliads · 13 hours
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Can you do Peter Pan x reader OUAT? Peter goes to the modern world with Emma, Snow, David and them as they are looking for someone. He meets this girl and takes an interest to her. He’s never seen someone with facial piercings, and dyed hair before, they come to realize she is the girl they’ve been looking for.
'magic finds magic' - peter pan
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Peter Pan is leaving Neverland. Worse, he’s leaving Neverland alongside Snow, Emma, David, and Hook. In terms of traveling partners, this has got to be the lowest of the low. However, the sand in Peter’s immortal hourglass is running out, and his first attempt at prolonging his life with the heart of Henry Mills didn’t exactly go according to plan. It’s this or nothing, even though Peter is starting to wonder if it would be better to just die than put up with these people any longer.
Never in his life did Peter Pan think he’d be working with the good guys. But never in his life did Peter think he’d be dying, either. A few compromises will have to be made in the name of preserving Peter’s everlasting life, and if that means he has to put up with some princesses and pirates for a few days, so be it. In no time at all, his immortal life will be restored, and he can go back to Neverland and put all of this behind him. Hopefully.
Peter was supposed to die back on Neverland. He was running out of time, anyway. He had set up the perfect scheme:  kidnap Henry, disorient the boy’s rescuers on his island long enough to win the Heart of the Truest Believer, and cut the organ out of the boy’s chest if necessary. He’d almost gotten away with it, too, except he was foiled at the last minute. Heartbreaking. So unlike him.
For some reason, though, he hadn’t been left to die in the caverns of Skull Rock. Emma and the others had needed him, for some odd reason, and although none of them trust him in the slightest, they do trust Peter’s single-minded selfishness to keep himself alive. So they claim, at least, and so they had gotten a spell to give Peter one more week of life in exchange for help. If this plan works out, Peter will have a way to continue his immortal life without needing to murder Henry. If it doesn’t, or if he betrays them, he’ll die anyway.
He can feel it now, the pang of his close call with death. There’s a pain in his chest that wasn’t there before, a certain weakness in his lungs. Peter gets tired more easily. He feels– well, he feels like Henry and Emma. He feels mortal. Like he could die at any moment.
Peter has, obviously, thought about double-crossing them, maybe even triple-crossing them, but it’s no use. He feels shakily mortal right now, and Peter does not much enjoy the possibility of his own demise. This is the closest he’s ever come to being beaten, and Peter hates the feeling. He’ll have to play along for now, but after that, he will have his revenge.
First, though, Peter has to do what the others want. They’ve been careful to reveal as few details to him as possible, but the idea is solid. There’s a magical person somewhere in the modern world, in a city far from Storybrooke. This person is like the embodiment of a true love’s kiss spell, designed to renew hope in storybook characters through small acts of power that ultimately drive two needed people together. They’re like a guardian angel of those on the brink of destruction, which is exactly what Peter needs right now.
Peter has plenty of time to mull this over. They’ve forced him into a terrible, small room with awful carpets– an apartment, Emma called it– while they talk out what to do with both him and their missing spell-person. Peter is trying to focus, but he’s getting stared at by Henry Mills again, which is absolutely ruining his mood.
“What do you want?” Peter asks, glaring at the boy.
Henry just goggles back at him. “Don’t you feel bad for trying to kill me?”
Peter snorts. “Why would I do that?”
Henry shrugs. “You pretended you were my friend. I know you like the other Lost Boys on your island, I thought you would have felt bad for killing one of them. I guess not.”
“I don’t feel bad about killing someone so I would live,” Peter says, then wonders why he’s arguing with a child. “Go preach your morals to someone who wants to listen.”
“The others are busy,” Henry pouts.
Peter eyes him unhappily. “And what, I’m your best option for polite conversation? You really are desperate, aren’t you?”
Henry rolls his eyes. “I’d say you’re desperate. You’re the one who’s still talking to me.”
Peter can’t really argue with that, so he deftly changes the topic of conversation before Henry starts looking proud of himself again. “Tell me about our target again. You said you saw them before?”
“Only in a dream,” Henry admits, “but it was a clear dream, I swear. I saw a girl who looked about your age. She seemed like any other teenager, but there was something about her that was different. The way she spoke, maybe, or the glint in her eyes. She was magical, I’m sure of it. She can save Storybrooke.”
“And save me,” Peter reminds him. “That’s the important part.”
Henry rolls his eyes again. If he keeps that up, they’re going to get stuck like that forever. “Yes, I know, you’re only interested in keeping yourself alive. So long as it helps us find this girl, though, I don’t care.”
Peter leans forward. “What’s your plan for finding this girl, then? A little scouting party? This city is big. You’ll never find her.”
Henry shakes his head. “Magic has a way of finding magic. Somehow, our paths will cross.”
“That’s a terrible strategy,” Peter grouses. Why is he entrusting his life to this boy again? He remembers something about having no other options, but it doesn’t seem as good an excuse right now.
“Ask the adults, then,” Henry tells him, and gestures towards the miniscule apartment kitchen, where Emma, Snow, Hook, and David are currently huddled around a table, talking in hushed voices about what to do.
Not wanting to mess with the kid anymore, Peter pulls himself to his feet and heads over. “Tell me you have a plan,” he says.
The adults look up at him. “Find the girl,” Hook says shortly. “That’s our plan.”
Peter scoffs. “You could search this city for months and not find her. What if she doesn’t want to be found? If this girl has any brains at all, she’ll know that people will want her magic and she’ll hide. It’s what I would do.”
Emma sighs. “We don’t even know if this girl knows that she has magic. She’s probably just living an ordinary life, and we’re about to drag her out of it with all of our trouble.”
“Don’t tell me you feel bad for her,” Peter scolds her. “You want this, don’t you? So go get it, or I will.”
Snow tries to tell him to calm down, but David, so quick to anger when it comes to Peter, surges out of his chair. “How about you do something helpful and think with us instead of just insulting us?”
“I will do something helpful,” Peter informs him. “I’ll find her first.”
With that, he lunges for the apartment door, and is out of the tiny room and down the hall before they can stop him. Peter hears the thunder of footsteps after him, but he hurries down the stairs and out of the building. He has the advantage of being quick on his feet; if Neverland taught him anything, it’s how to run when you don’t want to be found.
Peter emerges into the bright sunshine of the city and stops dead in his tracks. He’s not used to the modern world, how the knives of its buildings slash up into the sky, how loud it is with those cars and signs and people. Peter swears he can even see metal things in the sky, soaring along predestined paths. It’s all so much compared to the world he used to know. No wonder some of the others had a hard time adjusting. His mortal heart lets out a pang of sympathy.
The door of the apartment building flies open, revealing Emma and the others hot on his trail. Peter curses under his breath and takes off in one direction, hurtling around pedestrians and shooting down the sidewalk. He heads for smaller streets, hoping to lose them in a swarm of alleyways. The others, more used to the terrain of the modern city, are gaining on him, and Peter is just starting to think that he’ll never be able to shake them when someone grabs him and pulls him into a nearby building.
Peter’s first instinct is to defend himself, but when he isn’t attacked, he realizes that the stranger is only trying to help him. There’s a window just to his left, and Peter watches Emma and the others appear seconds after him. They didn’t see him enter the shop, and keep sprinting down the road in the direction they thought he’d gone. Peter waits a few more intense moments, then decides that he’s lost them for good and turns back around to see who’s gone to the trouble of rescuing him.
He’s greeted with the sight of a girl about his age. She’s eyeing him cautiously, although the corners of her lips begin to prick up with a wicked grin. “Sorry for the rough introduction, but you looked like you needed some help,” she tells him.
Peter lets out a short laugh. “I’m glad to be rid of them, that’s for sure.”
The girl arches a brow. “What, did they catch you shoplifting? I’ve never seen people run that fast unless they were getting chased by the cops.”
Peter narrows his eyes, trying to figure out how on earth he would lift a shop, then decides it’s probably some slang term he doesn’t know. “Something like that,” he says evasively.
He studies the girl’s face to see if he’d answered correctly, and, judging by her impressed grin, he had. “Nice,” she says. “I’m Y/N, by the way.”
“Peter,” he replies. He gets the urge to introduce himself as he usually would– Peter, Peter Pan– then remembers at the last second that Emma had warned him about telling people who he was. Apparently, telling people he was a fictional character in their world wouldn’t go over too well.
“Peter,” the girl repeats. “Nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you, too,” Peter says, and realizes belatedly that he means it. He feels like how he had at the start of it all, when the Lost Boys had first started appearing on this island, but this feeling is far stronger. He wants to get to know this girl. He certainly doesn’t want her to leave.
“I’m new to the city,” he says abruptly. “Any chance you could show me around?”
Y/N laughs, surprised. “You’re new and you’re already in trouble? You’ll fit right in, Peter.”
He grins, in on the joke a half beat late. “I like to have fun, that’s all.”
“Well,” Y/N says, starting to lead him back towards the door of the shop, “I like fun, too. Maybe we should stick together.”
“I’d like that,” Peter says, then wonders why he’s being so honest all of a sudden. When he sees Y/N’s smile– real this time, not sarcastic or joking, but genuinely because of him– he thinks he knows why.
The two of them step back out into the light. “Where to first?” Peter asks.
“I was going to ask you that,” Y/N replies. “What do you want to do? Sightseeing, maybe? We can get some food, or just talk.”
“Anything,” he says. He’d follow her anywhere. The feeling in him right now is like nothing he’s ever felt before. The pain in his chest, Peter realizes with some surprise, is gone. He feels immortal. Like living in this one moment could last forever.
They end up spending the next few hours together. Y/N shows him around the city, taking Peter to her favorite spots. Peter stares at the vast cityscape and finally starts to understand why someone might choose the modern world over the natural one. He’ll always pick Neverland first, of course, but seeing the world through Y/N’s eyes, it makes sense.
The two of them get along like a house on fire. Y/N’s got this rebellious streak to her that fits in perfectly with Peter’s, well, Peter-ness. No joke is too dark, no sarcastic comment too caustic. They feel the same. Peter doesn’t think he’s ever met someone who thinks so much like him.
As the sun starts to set in the sky, Peter feels his spirits sinking. He doesn’t want to let go of this day, not when he knows it can never happen again. He’s supposed to be finding Henry’s spell-girl, but all Peter wants to do is spend more time with Y/N.
His mood is especially ruined when they turn a corner and find Henry Mills walking towards them. Peter’s eyes widen and he tries to steer Y/N back in the direction they’d come, but it’s too late. Henry lets out an audible gasp and starts hurrying towards them.
“Peter,” Henry calls out when he’s close enough to talk, “We’ve been looking for you all over! Where have you been?”
Y/N glances at Henry dubiously. “Who’s this?”
“My little brother,” Peter blurts out.
At the same time, Henry chimes in, “My friend from school.”
Peter shoots the younger boy a quick glare, then turns back to Y/N. “Both, actually. He’s my step-brother. Recent marriage. We’re still getting acclimated. Our family is a little chaotic.”
“You can say that again,” Henry mumbles. Peter fights the urge to butcher him.
While Peter silently advises himself on why murder would be bad at a time like this, Henry stares openly at Y/N. All of a sudden, the boy’s mouth hangs open. “Oh my gosh, it’s you.”
Y/N’s brow furrows. “Excuse me?”
All of a sudden, Peter feels a sick sensation in his stomach. It couldn’t be. It couldn’t.
“You’re the girl from my dream,” Henry announces. “We’ve been looking for you.”
Y/N looks back at Peter. “What’s he talking about?”
The open, carefree expression, which had been on her face all day, is starting to be replaced with deep, unsettled fear. Peter hates to see it directed at him. “There’s something I need to tell you,” he begins. “Something about yourself.”
“You’re sounding a little creepy right now,” Y/N warns him. “Get to the point.”
“Alright,” Peter says. “You’re magical. So am I. We need your help to break a curse and save my life. How about that?”
Y/N shakes her head quickly. “This is crazy. Magic isn’t real.”
Peter can’t lose her, not like this, so he leans forward and holds out his hand. A ball of light appears inside his cupped fingers, glowing and bright. It’s a simple charm, one of the first he learned, but it has the desired effect. 
Y/N stares at it, transfixed, and when she speaks again, her voice is hushed. “That’s impossible.”
“Nothing is impossible,” Peter says. “Not magic. Not even the fact that you would find me in this city by accident. Magic is drawn to magic.”
Y/N’s eyes slowly raise to meet his. “This is real, then. I have magic.”
“You have magic,” Peter confirms. “Come with us, we can show you. They’re good people, Y/N. You can trust them.”
It’s the closest he’s ever come to honesty. For once, Peter isn’t playing a game. He isn’t trying to trick Y/N over to his side. He just wants her to be safe, and he knows that isn’t through lies.
Y/N smiles at him. “I trust you, Peter. That’s enough for me.”
She reaches over and takes his hand. Now that he’s focusing on it, Peter can feel the slow loop of her magic when they touch. It feels like power, but more than that, it feels like life. A life with her, maybe. A life for both of them.
ouat tag list: @loveanimals0000, @eclliipsed, @w1shes43, @lost-ender
all tags list: @wordsarelife
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kitmarlowe · 6 months
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Murder is Easy BBC One
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blueskittlesart · 1 month
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being in art school and having basically 0 knowledge about christianity whatsoever is so funny at this point i think you could tell me literally anything was an allegory for jesus and i'd just believe you
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andy-clutterbuck · 9 months
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frogmanfae · 8 months
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Modern David Jacobs sleeps with a weighted stuffed animal. It probably smells like lavender.
#Sarah made it for him for his birthday one year because he had told her he has trouble sleeping because of his anxiety#and she looked for one that was 1. an animal he liked and 2. was scented because they had discovered aromatherapy worked for David#but she couldn't find one that was both of those things and weighted#so she was like “fine I'll do it myself”#it's Davey's prized possession#he avoids sleep overs because he cant sleep without it and doesn't want anyone to know#Jack turns out to be his college room mate#when he inevitably finds out he suddenly understands why Davey never took up his offer to spend the night#he thinks its the cutest thing ever#he asks Sarah to make him one too#(so Davey is less embarrassed of course)#i like to think Davey's is a tarantula#Jack's is a horse?#or maybe Davey's is an otter and Jack's is a tarantula#either way one of them has a tarantula you can't change my mind#newsies#david jacobs#jack kelly#davey jacobs#modern newsies#david jacobs has anxiety#david jacobs probably has autism#eventually all of their friends have one of their own#sarah makes it into a business#with custom weights and scents#and she has a list of animals she makes but will make others upon request#Davey's is falling apart because Sarah had never made anything like it before his and he's had it for so long#he never washes it because he can't spend a nugbt without it#sarah eventually makes him another one so he has 2 of the same one but he insists on still sleeping eith the first one#someone take away my writing privileges or i will write this (/threat)
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foxynovacoda · 9 months
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At first, I wanted to watch Doctor who because a friend of mine talked abt it and I wanted to understand what she was saying and also because of David Tennant, now I'm watching Doctor who for Tom Baker and David Tennant
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fazcinatingblog · 23 days
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Wait since when does James wear a glove
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#James aish#beautiful boy#Carlton were mean to you Jimmy#i want to say he's copying Nat but no it was an elbow sleeve that Nat wore#nat drives James' car and finds a glove in the glove compartment and thinks he's having an affair with Travis Cloke#'jim when did you join Collingwood?'#'oh ah would've been around 2016' *nat does the maths* 'so you knew Travis cloke!'#'um yeah Nat everyone knows Travis Cloke he's---' 'a well respected member of the gay community?????'#nat starts fuming and worries he's losing his boyfriend to Travis cloke#'what does that big oaf have that i don't????' nat fumes#james comes home and there's several horses and donkeys in the kitchen#'nat??? did you leave the back door open again?' James calls out warily looking at the animals in his kitchen#nat comes running in to the kitchen 'oh i forgot to stir the soup' and#'babe there's donkeys in here' James says slowly and Nat flashes a grin 'yeah aren't they great we're having pumpkin soup your favourite'#'i haven't had pumpkin soup since Brisbane days when i was depressed eating cup a soups-- wait did you find my pocket profile from 2014???'#nat blushes and quickly throws a tea towels over his scrapbook of James Aish mementos#James starts leading the donkeys out of the kitchen and Nat's like 'wait Jim i thought you were into this thing'#'no definitely not' James retorts and takes the animals outside#he comes back and Nat's like 'babe i can't pack mark between three opponents any more I'm sorry'#James blinking confusedly 'i don't want you to do that you might get hurt'#'but...' nat says frowning 'what is it about Travis that you're into I've been racking my brain all day---'#'Travis?????' James said 'you mean coyler that tea drinking weasel who---'#Nat quickly pushes his cup of jasmine tea across the bench#'no babe i love you and your tea drinking i didn't mean it's just that Colyer-- he microwaves his tea'#'oh okay' Nat said 'yeah totally ok now back to Travis Cloke'#'Travis Cloke?????' james cries 'i haven't thought about him since i found that guernsey in your wardrobe signed by David---'#'i grew up a tigs fan Jim'#'oh phew i thought you were cheating on me with David'#'is that why you tried to grow a moustache that week?'
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pizzapizzadickz · 1 year
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#yeah! ill do thing#haha. i cant do anything today muchless feed myself#i cant fuction#personal#diary#i want to make a late or an espresso and theres nothing cleared off like my mom said it would so now idk what to do#i went from good morning to near meltdown in .5 seconds huh?#this is why i dont like it when someone says then tries to shut me up and doesnt do thing#like??? i didnt care id u cleared off infront of my espresso tbing that takes 5 seconds. but a peice of countertop???#yeah idk where i could even put anything#so yeah now i dont know what to do and am in pure stuck mode. bc i dont have space to make food either.#honestly i just hate everything so much. i hate life so much. im so tired i dont like this.#*david Attenborough voice* now look at this creature. utterly incapable of functioning without coffee. how useless.#ugh. seriously though. if i can just get through a morning and make coffee i can generally be more okay than i would otherwise#do you know how much it fucking sucks just waking up and being like#ugh. like i know this is probably in part bc i should be getting my period soon. but. its days like today i sorta wish i was dead#suicidal ideation#like. what am i supposed to do when it feels like the whole world is hostile. like. just one deviation from my plan and i cant handle ti#idk. it sucks really. im honestly not even asking for much anymore. i just wish i could at least play video games really.#if i could at least do that it wouldnt feel like such torture just existing. idk. i just want one thing.#idk. i know a lot of this is hormonal but even that sucks! why the fuck do i have to live like this.#idk. im really tired. really really tired. i still have to do work too this week. and honestly im so tired.#while i really do enjoy doing things n life n shit. i hate that like 90% of my life is just suffering. just pure suffering#...and yes i am wishing i am dead or something simply bc i couldnt make a latte like i planned#and no i will not be able to make myself breakfast now either. my morning is ruined now. so im unable to function#ugh. i just wanted to have a nice coffee and play splatoon today. but instead i got a nice case of yet again#idk. id be okay if there was just. nothing expected of me. if i didnt have to feed myself or work or shit.#like. me not wanting to exist is mostly just bc of the inconvenience i cause everyone around me#i have to be careful of what i say careful of what i do make sure i never bother anyone.#and so i just quietly cant functiom over here in a corner. just ugh. usually i can tidy shit up myself
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dukeoftheblackstar · 1 year
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trashcanalienist · 2 years
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I am not surviving Survival Mode.
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Pt I good omens but i've never watched it
i've never seen good omens but it's all over my tumblr dash so this is what I've gathered can someone please confirm if i've got it right
there's a demon named crowley
there's a biblically inaccurate angel named aziraphale but like it's very sexy when the demon calls him 'angel'
the demon and angel have been married for 6000 years and they still keep looking at each other all sappily
Neil Gaiman is somehow involved, I think he's the writer but also he's on tumblr (uh, @neil-gaiman) and people keep questioning if he's real
is neil gaiman like a fandom inside joke why is everyone asking if he's real
there actors are called michael and david and amazon prime thought they were the same
there is a bookstore and crowley is sad
they kiss and it is very nice and desperate and crowley says we could have been us. i have no context for this. someone is going to heaven i think.
there is a god, i'm not sure if they're good or evil though
the demon wears sunglasses
it's a comedy but for some reason everyone's crying after whatever the last season was, are you guys okay
things are on fire
they are very gay
there was a book and at one point they switch bodies
more fire and crowley screaming
they are called ineffable husbands i dont know what that means
they fight crime or they do crime or they fight crime by doing crime i really cannot remember which
gay
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