#i want to date her but i just. i can’t fight all these fucking monsters and figure out potions and all that shit

[star-girl69]

Let Me Love You Like A Woman

Clarisse La Rue x Fem!AphroditeCabin!Reader

—-

synopsis: you and clarisse broke up two months ago, and when you’re selected to go on a mission together, clarisse just wants you to let her love you.

a/n: i feel feelings about this one….. anyways i hope you all enjoy!!

Let Me Love You Like A Woman - Lana Del Rey

******i want to make this clear: there is absolutely NO smut in this fic. terms like “fuck buddies” and “friends with benefits” are used but only bc i cant think of anything else lmao. all they do is makeout and it is suggestive at times but there is NO SMUT

warnings: this is so bad tbh, what is clarisse doing, she’s so confused my little ladybug, y/n my other ladybug is confused too, OH MY GOD THERES ONLY ONE BED, swearing, hate make out sessions but the hate is one sided, kissing obvi!, deep talks about our feelings which is hard for clarisse, angst, mentions of death blood and monsters, lovesick!! slightly desperate!!! clarisse my cutesy little ladybug, exes/enemies w benefits so like mentions of sex and such, very suggestive lol, as an actual server the restaurant scene hurt me to write lol, but for the plot, tell me if i missed anything!!

—-

The Big House is the one place in camp you’re really unfamiliar with. It’s not like you haven’t been there before, it’s just you don’t go there that often.

And unknown places scare you.

There’s hiding places you don’t know about, blind spots you aren’t aware of- corners and small secrets and rules that you haven’t learned yet.

You make your way up the steps and through the porch, the familiar part- you pass by the infirmary and the random office no one uses- until you make it to the connected gondola Chiron and Mr. D. spend most of their time at.

You’re about to turn and enter when a familiar figure appears in front of you.

It hurts to think about how you’ll always know it’s her.

She seems just as shocked to see you but covers it up quickly.

“Y/N,” she smirks, looking you up and down.

You stop, go to turn around and march off in the other direction when you remember you can’t.

Clarisse La Rue doesn’t deserve the dirt under your feet, even though she would probably eat it if you asked- charmspeak used or not.

“Clarisse,” you mumble, and she frowns. You never really called her by her name when you dated, and you know it bothers her now to hear you say it.

That’s exactly why you do it, of course, but the part of you that knows everything about her and will always love her squeezes at the sight of her poorly-hidden sad face.

She’s been slipping up lately. It warms your heart to know that’s because of you.

“What are you doing here?” she asks, genuinely curious.

As a cabin leader, it’s not unusual for Clarisse to be here. But she knows you’re scared of the unknown, and she knows it’s just not in your routine to come here.

“Dunno,” you shrug. “Got called here.”

Her eyes light up. “How funny, so did I.”

You roll your eyes, fighting against the parts of your body that want to run towards her and the parts that want to run away. Instead, you listen to your brain and feel her staring at you as you turn the corner into the gondola.

“Y/N, Clarisse,” Chiron greets with a pleasant smile, setting down a hand of cards face-down. You almost laugh at Mr. D’s disappointed look- Chiron isn’t the trainer of demigods for no reason.

“Yeah, yeah, welcome,” Mr D says, seeming entirely uninterested. You both stand there slightly awkwardly.

Chiron is known to be blunt, so he of course jumps right in.

“We have a mission for the two of you.”

“The two of us? Like, just the two of us?”

The words come out before you can stop them, fingers twisting together and mouth slamming shut. You’re fine, you try to tell yourself, even though your mind and body agree on one thing- being too close to Clarisse will just lead you right back to her.

Clarisse tries to hide her hopeful smile, but you see through it. You loved her for so long, of course you see through it.

“Uh… yes,” Chiron says. You clench your fists.

Mr D seems interested now, especially after your outburst.

“Oh,” he laughs. “I see.” He gestures between the two of you, “there’s bad blood.”

Chiron presses his lips together.

“Nothing that doesn’t make us capable of going on this mission,” Clarisse says, taking a step forward. She smiles at you, but doesn’t make a move to touch you. At least she knows some limits, even if they don’t matter now.

“Well,” Chiron continues, seeming to regret his decision but deciding it’s too late. “Y/N. Your charmspeak, I feel, will be extremely important to this mission. And, Clarisse, daughter of Ares- your skills in battle are nothing to scoff at. There is an item I require the retrieval of. A friend left it in a P.o. box in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. The journey is not particularly perilous, but being a demigod carries an affinity for danger.”

You nod, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I trust the two of you will be able to put aside your… ‘bad blood’ and complete your mission?”

Maybe this mission will be good for you. It certainly nowhere near the kleos of a quest, but more so gives you bonus points with Chiron. That could be helpful.

Clarisse looks at you.

“Oh, yes. Don’t worry.”

—-

“Y/N.”

You walk away from Clarisse pointedly, hoping she’ll take the hint.

You’ve decided you’ll do this quest. If you ever did want to be a cabin leader in the future- you either had to be well liked or the best. As a daughter of Aphrodite, you were already well liked- conversation and flattery came as easy to you as breathing.

Even before you learned how to use your charmspeak, you could sweet talk almost anyone into doing whatever you wanted. You really needed an A on that test? A few tears and some master manipulation- suddenly that A was yours.

But, Chiron needed to like you too.

You do this quest for him- which he choose you for- and then you earn even more of his respect.

It was such a simple exchange. It could be such a simple exchange, except if the girl hot on your heels wasn’t your partner.

She finally manages to grab your wrist and whip you back around so you’re facing her.

She smiles.

“I’ll always catch you, you know. No use in running, really.”

“At least I’ll go down fighting,” you say, looking anywhere but her eyes like portals that suck you in. She’s so close to you.

If this was the before you would wrap your arms around her neck and hers would go to your waist. Even if you were mad at her, she would press her body close to yours and kiss the corner of your lips- Clarisse made it her life’s mission to know every inch of you, and she succeeded. She would know the exact way to calm you down and get you to look at her and hear her out.

And most of the time you were being dramatic, or simply joking, and then she would kiss you and it would all be fine again.

Except it’s not the before. It’s the after, and your heart hurts being so close to her.

“What do you want, Clarisse?” you sigh.

“I just wanted to talk to you.”

Your chest blazes. “Go talk to literally anyone else.”

Her face hardens.

“How many times do I have to tell you before you understand that you are the only person I care about?”

You rip your hand away from her grip.

“Shut up,” you hiss, turning and walking away.

“Fine. I’ll see you tomorrow at the gates,” you can feel her smile. “And then I’ll see you all on our mission, huh?”

“You’re crazy!”

—-

You walk into the Hermes cabin and fall face first onto your best friend Marley’s bed.

She looks up from her book and laughs.

“Oh, babe, what happened?” she asks, scratching the back of your scalp as you pull yourself up into your elbows and place your head in her lap.

“Mission,” you groan.

She stops. “A mission? For Chiron? Gods, Y/N that’s amazing-”

“With Clarisse.”

She takes her hand away from your scalp and moves to your chin, lifting you up.

As much as Clarisse hurt you and you hate her, Marley had always had a special sort of hatred for her. Even when you were happy and dating- you would tease her that maybe she’s actually a daughter of Ares, seeing how angry she was.

She was always overprotective, she insisted she just had a bad feeling about her- but eventually she stopped and you thought you could have it all.

“I’m sorry,” Marley laughs. “I don’t think I heard you right.”

You put your lips right up to her ear.

“MISSION WITH CLARISSE-”

“Y/N!” she yells and pushes you away, groaning as she holds her ear. “My ears are bleeding now, oh my Gods-”

“You’ll be fine,” you groan, settling back into her lap. “I’m the one who actually has to go with her.”

“Actually?” she whispers after a tense moment. “You actually have to go with her?”

“It’s fine,” you mumble.

“It’s not. Maybe I-I can talk to Chiron, or maybe I could come with you, huh?”

“No, thanks, Marls. It’s alright, really.”

She stares down at you, head tilted slightly to the side. Marley has always been exceptionally good at hiding her emotions. But you can tell she’s angry. She’s scared.

She’s your best friend and you will always love her in the most special way.

“I don’t want you to go,” she whispers.

The Hermes cabin is always a bustle of activity. But when you’re just here with Marley, it’s the two of you. It’s perfect. It’s what you’ve always wanted- selfishly- to feel special. You feel special with her eyes on you, your head in her lap. She’s your best friend.

You put your hand on her face.

“As much as I hate it, we both know Clarisse won’t let anything happen to me. I’ll be safe.”

“Yeah, but what if she does something to you?”

What if she does absolutely nothing and you fall in love with her all over again?

You always thought that all that stuff about feeling your heart physically break couldn’t be true- but you know it is. You felt it break and every time you look at Clarisse and it can’t be like it was before your heart breaks a little more.

Clarisse acted like you were some big secret that was a chore to hide, and then when you were in her arms she would call you the prettiest girl. It was like whiplash, feeling her touch so tenderly and then not even being allowed to look at her in public. And you wanted so badly to tell everyone that she was yours and you were hers- but she just couldn’t.

And you don’t care about the reason behind that, not after that one night, not after she told you she could never love you.

She doesn’t really want you. She acts like she does, but she only misses you on the surface. Sure, you miss her body, but you miss your late night talks and the way she was always there to protect you, the way she made you feel. You like the person you are with her.

She wants an idea of you, she wants you under her, she wants power and control.

You think maybe a part of her really does regret losing you that night. But, she laid it all out that night. What she feels doesn’t make up for what she said. She doesn’t love you because she’s insecure, because she’s self-serving and power hungry.

She makes you feel stupid waiting for her, but why would you wait for someone else when you could wait for her to come back? You don’t like the unknown, and Clarisse is the one thing you really know.

You look into Marley’s eyes now.

“It will be good for me,” you whisper. “I’ll earn Chiron’s respect.”

Marley kisses your cheek.

“I know. I just don’t want you to go, and I know that makes me selfish but- still.”

“I know, Marls. I know,” you whisper. But this will be good for you, and it’s already been done. You already accepted it.

Marley helps you pack and you watch her anger. You watch her roughness, you watch the fire in her eyes- and Gods, does it make you feel special to have a friend like her.

You only wish you could make Clarisse feel like that too.

—-

The bus ride is boring.

Clarisse, for some merciful reason, decides not to torture you and instead throw her dagger up and down.

But you’re bored.

You’ve been reading a book Marley lended you, something boring and wonderfully distracting about the history of the four wind gods- you think about the wind and not about the way Clarisse’s thigh is pressed up next to yours.

It’s only been two months.

As much as you hate it, you won’t even admit it to Marley, but you’ll admit it to yourself in the quietness of the back of the bus.

You close the book and stuff it into your backpack.

You miss her.

“I’m bored,” you announce before you can second guess yourself.

“Okay,” Clarisse hums, picking at a speck of hardened dirt on her dagger. “I know a lot of things we could do to remedy that.”

Your cheeks flush, but you hold your ground. “I’m not going to kiss you. One, it smells like shit back here and two, we’re not dating anymore.”

“True, but doesn’t that just make it more fun?”

“What?”

Her hand moves to your thigh and you let yourself sink into the before.

“We aren’t supposed to- your best-fuckin’-friend would skin me alive. But we both know you want to.”

“I don’t want my lips anywhere near you.”

She just smiles at you, and you suddenly realize you’ve been staring into her eyes this entire time.

She takes her hand off of you and turns away, and this part of you aches so badly for the before- but it’s after. But she doesn’t love you and she just wants you.

But you want her too. You want her so bad, and maybe if you just let yourself sink into her one more time then you can move on. One good goodbye and you’ll be fine.

“Take a nap, then,” she suggests. “We still have another hour before the next rest stop, I’ll wake you up.”

“Okay,” you mumble, a part of you loathing listening to her, but a nap sounds good.

—-

You sleep the best you ever have since you broke up.

Clarisse was always sneaking into your bed, or you into hers, and she was always so warm and made you feel so safe. You always slept with her. And while you could still fall asleep fine without her- it just wasn’t the same.

You wake up to the sound of the bus doors opening and people talking around you.

“Y/N,” Clarisse whispers. “Wake up.”

You realize your head is on her shoulder.

You push her away from you, she just laughs and stands up.

“So stubborn,” she mumbles, leaning down to dig into her bag for the money Chiron gave you.

You resist the urge to say something snarky back, instead choosing to squeeze past her and out into the aisle.

She’s following behind you in a second, her bag zipping up and getting thrown back under the seat.

She’s right up in your ear.

“I know you hate me,” she whispers. “But you can’t just go running off. What if there was a monster right outside the doors?”

The two of you step off of the bus, the bright sunshine making your squint.

You pull up your shirt and pat your hip where your dagger rests.

“I’d kill it.”

You both know you probably couldn’t.

She laughs. “Is that the dagger I gave you?”

Your face freezes but you keep walking into the rest stop.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you huff.

She sticks her fingers through the loop of your jeans and pulls you into an aisle filled with chips. You suddenly find a bag of Cheetos very interesting.

She looks at your face, into your eyes, and traces her fingers over the dagger’s handle.

“Hm, mine.”

You miss her so bad. You never knew it was possible to miss someone this much. You miss her body and her mind and her voice. You miss her hands and her lips and the way she made you feel.

You don’t pull away. How can you pull away?

It was easy to ignore her when she wasn’t right in front of you, but there’s this part of you that loves her and wants to believe her. Then there’s another part that wants to see her suffer like she did to you.

You push her off of you. “Don’t touch me.”

Again, she just smiles, and that’s really starting to piss you off.

—-

You’re somewhere in the middle of Pennsylvania at a bus stop, waiting to cross the lonesome highway to the other side of the street where a train station awaits you.

“Are you okay?” Clarisse asks, and you realize she’s already stepped out onto the road and you’ve been staring off into nothing. You quickly follow her, half running across the road until you get to the sweet, sweet air conditioned station.

“Yeah, ‘m fine.”

In reality, you have to keep yourself distracted so you don’t fall back into her. You’ve decided it not about whether or not you love or want to hear her out- it’s about the way she kisses you and the way her skin feels against yours.

You can want her, here, where no one will know.

You’ll swear her to secrecy, and she’ll shut up just for the chance of more. And you don’t know if you’ll give it to her.

The station is oddly busy.

You have this horribly uneasy feeling.

You make your way into the line anyways, snatching the tickets from where they’re scrunched up in her hand, trying your best to flatten them again.

She laughs. You refuse to feel the way it makes your heart ache. You think about the other reasons she makes your heart ache.

You see something, shiny and black out of the corner of your eye. When you look over, the indented entrance to a janitor’s closet is marked in shadows.

But you trust yourself.

“I think I just saw something,” you whisper.

She still makes you feel safe. She’s one of the most talented warriors at camp and she loves you- even Marley admitted she won’t let anything happen to you.

She follows your gaze. And she doesn’t see anything.

“Okay,” she murmurs. She trusts you too. Her eyes flick between the shortening line and the shadows. “Maybe one more minute then we’re on the train.”

“Yeah,” you agree, slipping your hand into hers. You can hear her inhale sharply. She’s not phased by a potential monster, but you holding her hand makes her face flush.

Why is she so fucking confusing?

As far as you can tell, she just wants to be fuck buddies- so why is she blushing as you hold her hand?

She squeezes your hand, and Clarisse is right, you make it to the front of the line. The man checks your tickets and hole punches them, welcoming you back into the outdoors.

You look over your shoulder, and something shiny reflects in the sunlight, still in the shadows of the building.

“Clarisse.”

She seems to see it too.

“I can’t tell what it is,” you say.

She tugs you along. “I don’t want to find out.”

When you finally step foot onto the train you take your hand from Clarisse’s and look down at the tickets. Cabin 4A. It’s near the front, so you find it fairly quick- just a simple one room cabin.

You quickly barricade yourself inside, drawing the curtains and setting your stuff on the floor.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

“That was tense,” you mutter. Clarisse holds her wrist. She nods, staring down at your feet before sighing.

Somehow, it’s six o’clock. You dig into your snacks, neither of you feeling like leaving the safety of the cabin to go to the dining cart.

The train car has two benches facing each other, overhead storage and a large window. There’s practically no room in between the two benches- the car is maybe 5 feet wide.

You miss Marley. You could always talk to her from across the pavilion during a meal- entire conversations with just your eyes. You miss your siblings, their conversation filling up the silence. Here, there’s nothing.

It’s so silent, and yet it’s that comfortable silence with Clarisse. It makes you miss the before.

That’s all you’ve been doing- missing things and wishing they were different.

The train starts and you stare out the window, the rolling hills and the trees and the small creek. You can feel Clarisse looking at you. You try your best to ignore the way her gaze makes you feel- but you’re alone in this cabin. There’s no one else here. There’s no one else to know if you give in one time.

Something slams against the door.

You breathe in and Clarisse grabs her spear.

“Should I open it?” you whisper, standing up. She sticks out her spear to stop you from moving forward.

The two of you listen, but nothing else happens.

It wasn’t a knock. It sounded sort of like a ball being kicked into the door.

“I’m opening it,” you decide, curiosity killing you, pushing Clarisse’s spear aside.

“Y/N,” she warns, but you’ve already slid open the door.

Absolutely nothing is there. You look out the adjacent windows, down the hallways lined with red carpet.

You shrug. “Nothing’s here-”

It’s cold and scaly when it lands on you.

The same black shiny thing you saw, it’s slithering around your neck, cutting off your air supply immediately. You can’t even scream you’re too scared, hands clawing at your neck but it squeezes and one of its heads rears up to attack your chest-

Clarisse’s spear sails right through its raised head.

It drops, you fall back, gasping, watching as she pins it under her boot and lifts the spear out of it. It’s wriggling and trying to break free- but she stabs it through its other head.

It’s an amphisbaena. A horrible, scaly black snake-sort of thing with a head on each end.

You rub your chest, swallowing a lump in your throat as Clarisse casually picks up the now dead monster and opens the adjacent emergency exit window in the hallway- throwing it out into the middle of nowhere.

She turns back around, frowning at the blood coating the ends of her spear-

You slam into her. You’re breathing so heavily, you still feel like it’s around your neck, but Clarisse carefully wraps her arms around your waist, letting you lean against her as your shaky hands massage your neck.

No one would know.

Her spear falls to the floor.

“Hey, it’s okay, it’s dead,” she whispers, kicking the cabin door closed with her foot.

No one would know.

“Thank you,” you breathe. “Oh, Gods, thank you, Clarisse.”

“No problem,” she says.

No one would know.

“Clar,” you mumble. She stiffens at the nickname. She tenderly brings one hand up to your face, and she wants you just as much as you want her- that’s all this is about. An exchange. You’ll kiss her for the last time and you’ll finally get over her.

“I know,” she mumbles, she feels the burning in her stomach too. You’re connected by that in this one moment, your mutual desire and need. Except she has a need for a new beginning, and you have a need for an end.

It’s so simple.

You both can get what you want from this trip.

“I know,” she says again, her nose touching yours. Your breaths mix in the air. “I know, I miss you so much… so bad, Y/N, you don’t…”

“Show me,” you whisper against her lips, and she does.

You can feel it all, the regret you don’t care about, and the desire and want and need you do care about.

You need to feel more of that. You need to feel special, so when your back hits the the door and her hands are all over you, you tilt your head back and look up at the ceiling, mouth twisted into a moan.

You need her to make you feel special. You don’t feel special without her, without her rough hands and her soft lips. It’s the one trait from your mother that you somewhat despise- the innate need to be the center, to be the focus, to feel special. She’s the only one who has ever made you feel like this.

No one else will ever come close.

“I hate you,” you breathe. You can’t think, all your walls are down. “I hate you so much and I still…. I still…”

She kisses you again so you don’t have to say it.

—-

The bed is scratchy and uncomfortable, but there’s only one- and it’s so tiny you’re pressed right up against Clarisse. She doesn’t wrap her arm around you, even though you wish she would, if only because you’re cold.

Not because you’re still irrecoverably in love with her and you know she won’t. And even if she does, it won’t be in the way you want it.

How can she kiss you like she loves you yet claim she never will? How can one kiss make you so weak in the knees that you’re genuinely considering doing this for any scrap of her you can get?

You stare up the ceiling for a long time, until you come to that weird space where you’re so tired you can’t move and your eyes are closed, but you’re still awake.

She wraps her arm around your waist and kisses your temple.

—-

The next time she kisses you you’ve gotten used to this whole making out with no strings thing.

You’re about to get off the train, so you tidy your stuff and head to the dining cart for pretty pastries and bagels and some fruit. On your way back, maybe 15 minutes left in your ride, someone in a uniform sees two teenage girls heading alone into a room.

When he asks where your parents are, can he see your tickets, you panic and charmspeak him to forget he ever saw this and walk away.

“Close,” you laugh, and Clarisse mumbles some sort of noncommittal agreement before smashing her lips onto yours.

You gasp but kiss her back, just reveling in having her hands on you. Her hands tangle in your hair, tugging back so she has better access to your neck- the side of it already sporting a hickey from last night.

“Did I ever tell you how fucking hot you are when you use your charmspeak?”

“I don’t know,” you mumble, because you can’t think of anything when her lips are on your neck.

—-

The station is luckily only 20 minutes away from the P.o. box, so the walk is quick through the streets of Myrtle Beach. It’s so loud here. There’s cars constantly whizzing past you, people yelling and honking, sirens in the distance. It’s confusing. It’s so different from Camp.

“I fucking hate this place,” you mumble, fidgeting with a loose string on your backpack.

“I do too,” Clarisse answers, but not for the same reasons. Her eyes whip around, searching for anything hiding in the shadows- but the sky is so blue and the sun makes your skin so warm- it seems unfathomable that any monsters would be here.

Of course, they’re here. They just haven’t come out yet.

Clarisse has been angry at the world for as long as you can remember, but you always thought her roughness balanced out with your softness. Ares and Aphrodite, love and war, peace and violence.

You always thought you could bring out that little bit of softness in her.

“On your left!”

Clarisse drags you out of the way just for a man on a bike to speed past you- your eyes flick to the perfectly usable bike lane on the street.

“Asshole,” you mutter.

“Asshole!” Clarisse shouts after him at the same time. He flips you off and continues shouting at more people to move.

Her hand is digging into your arm. She lets go after she huffs, muttering a few more choice words.

She keeps glaring at every honking car and random pedestrian. You roll your eyes when she yells at some random car to go die, laughing.

“Always fuckin’ honking,” she mutters. You know if she ever got behind the wheel, she would do the exact same thing.

“You’re not any better,” you tell her, nudging her hand that’s currently balled up into a fist.

“Yeah, well, I have a reason to be mad.”

Clarisse is angry at the world, but you know she has reasons. She’s not just angry for the sake of being angry, although she finds comfort in the familiar just like you, she is angry at the world that has done nothing but wrong her time and time again.

Sometimes you wish you could have as much fire in you as her. And two months ago, you thought she had enough fire in her for the both of us.

“Why don’t we grab the box and then go to lunch?” you suggest, getting the feeling that Clarisse is about to explode. She looks at you. “We have a few hours until our train back, hm?”

“Yeah, okay.”

—-

Chiron said this mission wasn’t going to be that dangerous, but you are surprised when it really is that easy. You take the key out from the envelope Chiron gave you, opening the blue box and coming out with a small box. It almost looks like some sort of fancy necklace- a long black box with a silver bow on the outside.

“This feels too easy,” Clarisse says as you lean down to carefully place it in your bag.

You shrug. “You’re always so paranoid, just let it all come naturally. Some things are easy, Clar.”

She stares at you for a moment.

“I guess,” she says, sticking out her hand to help you up before you both make your way back out onto the streets.

Her spear is hidden by the mist, strapped to her back, and you’re sure she has a bunch of little daggers strapped all over her. You scan the busy street.

Clarisse snorts at a restaurant called “Mother Earth Green Food” and her eyes light up at the sight of a 80’s style diner- “Mr. Steve’s Burgers and Bacon”.

“We’re going there,” she declares, and you roll your eyes but follow her across the street. It’s not that busy, seeing as it’s still early, so you’re seated quickly. It feels so good and so wrong to be here across from her like this.

It feels like before. Except some sort of alternate reality, where you actually left camp and got to be like this. You still want her and your trip’s not over yet, so you sink into it.

“Hey guys, I’m Miley and I’ll be your server today. What can I get you for drinks?”

She’s got long dirty blonde hair, tied up in two very neat and impressive space buns. Her skin is tan, but you suppose if she lives near the beach then everyone’s skin is tan, really.

“I really like your hair,” you tell her, pointing to the side of her head. She smiles and bounces one of them in her hand.

“Took me forever,” she chuckles. “I love yours, such a pretty color.” You cheeks blush as you thank her.

She smiles at you and goes off to get them, so you turn back to your menu. Clarisse’s foot taps against the floor.

“What are you thinking of getting?”

She sets her menu down and points to some sort of monstrous burger called “The Bomb.”

You laugh. “The Bomb,” you mock. “Will it explode in your stomach, or something?”

She mumbles something under her breath, staring off towards the counter, and you can tell by the look on her face it’s not anything nice.

“What was that?”

She presses her lips together. “Nothing,” she hums.

You shoot her an odd look but she pointedly looks away, and as much as you want to, you decide not to push.

Miley comes back with your drinks, and you thank her as she sets them down. Clarisse mumbles a thank you too after you kick her foot.

“Okay, and what can I get you guys to eat today?”

You have to kick Clarisse again to remind her to say please.

You smile apologetically up at Miley for Clarisse’s sour mood, but she seems not to care, smiling back at you and saying something about how she’ll make sure it’s out quick for you.

“‘I’ll make sure it comes out quick for you,’” Clarisse mocks, her voice a pitch higher.

“Yeah. Isn’t she so nice? And yet here you are treating her like shit.”

“She’s sucking up for a good tip.”

“Or maybe she’s just nice, Clarisse. There are nice people in the world, you know. Not everyone is all dark and brooding or bitchy.”

The silences stretches for a second too long. “Yeah. Yeah, I know.”

You hum, sitting on your hands and staring out the window. It’s times like this your miss your mortal childhood, having access to electronics meant you were never bored. You debate taking out the book Marley loaned you, but you don’t get the chance to.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” Clarisse announces. “Come with me.” She’s already walking away.

“Who’s gonna watch our stuff?”

“Tell fuckin’ Miley to do it, I don’t care.”

You look around. There’s not many people in the restaurant, and you’re curious and bored- so you follow her. The door swings closed behind her, and it takes you a second to follow her in.

You think she’s disappeared, the bathroom empty with two open stalls. The door is kicked closed behind you. You turn around and Clarisse pushes you into the nearest bathroom, her hands on your waist- you moan in surprise, letting her flip the two of you around and press you against the door, her hand leaving your waist to make quick work of the lock.

“Clarisse,” you breathe. “What’s going on?”

“Do you want me to stop?”

You don’t answer and she kisses you deeper.

—-

“Clarisse.”

She’s been smiling at your neck a little too obviously, and when she finally lets you out from under her lips and hands, you immediately turn around and head for the mirror.

“Clarisse,” you repeat.

She’s looking at you in the mirror and smiling. Actually fucking smiling.

“What is wrong with you?!” you yell, turning on the cold water and frantically bringing it to the red hickies on your neck. “Are you a vampire? Oh, my Gods, Clarisse, this is so fucking embarrassing!”

“It’s not,” she huffs. “You’ll be fine.”

“Cl-” but she’s already left. She really has to stop doing that.

—-

Lunch is fine, you leave Miley a nice tip, even though Clarisse scoffs and mumbles that she wasn’t that good- but you feel so bad that she had to watch you wiggle in your seat, desperately trying to hide your neck as Clarisse ran her foot up and down the side of your leg.

You ignore her the entire walk to the station, she barely hides the smug look on her face. Is she just intent on making you seem stupid and weak? Does she want to embarrass you? She knows. She knows you’re still in love with her and she’s playing you like a fiddle.

You thought Clarisse to be a lot of things, and you know she’s cruel and ruthless- but you never thought she could be this way towards you.

You make it onto the train with no problems, and you’re desperate to just get out of this place and back to camp where you can ignore her. You had one last final hurrah, and now you need to forget her.

You stare pointedly out the window. You ate dinner in the dining cart in silence, Clarisse didn’t try to touch you again, but she seems bored of letting you sulk now that there’s nothing else to entertain her.

It’s only about 7:00 pm- you still have an entire night with her, and a bus ride the next day. Why are the Gods torturing you like this?

“Y/N,” Clarisse says. You’re sitting across from each other. Her foot kicks at yours. “C’mere,” she pats the space next to her on the bench.

You snort. “You’re crazy. I’m not sitting near you.”

She shrugs and stands up, sitting next to you while you gasp in exasperation.

“Bitch,” you mumble, clenching your fists at you stand. She plants her hand on the window, trapping you in with her arm.

“Don’t be mean.”

You fold your arms and stare out the window. She’s right at your shoulder, whispering in your ear even though your alone- it makes you feel so special your head gets all dizzy.

“I want you, Y/N.” Not the way you want her.

“I. Don’t. Care.”

She laughs. You can see her reflection in the mirror, she’s laughing and smiling fondly- staring at you.

You whip around and point your finger at her.

“I won’t let you treat me like a rag doll anymore.”

Her smile falls.

“I used to be something you could just swing around, but I’m not anymore. I won’t ever be a toy for you, Clarisse. These past two days were fun, but they were goodbye. When we get back to Camp I’m getting over you, because I’ve spent too much time waiting for you.”

Her hand falls from the window, and she backs away from you.

—-

When you realize that this train also features another small, single bed, you resist the urge to stomp your feet like a child. Instead, you pretend like it’s all fine, a part of you pretends it’s that alternate before- Clarisse turning around while you change and you leave to brush your teeth and then you come back to her in bed.

You lay down, body unwillingly pressed up against hers. She doesn’t touch you, at least, and it’s tense and silent until she breaks it. Her hand finds yours through the sheets and blankets.

“Y/N.”

You try to shake her hand off of you, mumbling that she’s using your tiredness to manipulate you.

“Do you really think that’s all you were to me?”

You’re frozen, she’s right up against your back, breath tickling your shoulder and voice in your ear again.

Your hand still fits perfectly in hers.

“A toy?”

“What else was I supposed to think?”

She utters the two words you never thought you would hear her say.

“I’m sorry.”

Your breathe hitches.

“I-I know I’ve been stupid, I’m not totally dumb. I just, I had it in my head that I could make you fall in love with me all over again. And then I could do it right, I could fix it, and you could teach me how to love you and I would do it right, Y/N. And then I… I got jealous. Because that fucking server was flirting with you, she was, and I got fucking jealous and I fucked it all up.”

She’s breathing heavily at your shoulder.

“I was scared, Y/N. And that… I didn’t know how to deal with that. I was scared because I love you so much I know I would do anything you asked me too. So, I said those stupid things that night, I just lied because I was scared, and I’ll never forgive myself for the way I made you feel. I don’t deserve another chance, but I want to show you that I can do it right. I can do it however you want me too, as long as you teach me.”

It’s silent for a moment.

“I want you to let me love you.”

She lets go of your hand.

“You don’t have to say anything, I guess,” she swallows. “I mean, if I was you I would have killed me-”

“Really?” you voice comes out like a broken whisper, sitting up so you can look into her eyes. You try to tell if she’s lying, but you can’t. It hurts and it aches so good and she’s not lying.

“Y-yeah, I would have killed me.”

You smile. “No, dumbass, do you really love me?”

“Oh,” she blinks, sitting up too. “Y/N, I love you so much that I’ll never be the same person again.”

You don’t want to kiss her. All you’ve been doing is kissing her, sinking into that hard and rough side of your relationship that’s just hot desire.

But there’s a soft part to Clarisse that you bring out. And you bring it out now, winding your arms around her neck, breathing heavily as you rest your head on her shoulder. She hugs you, her arms are so strong, she always gives the best hugs- and kisses your temple like she did when she thought you were sleeping.

She loved you even when she didn’t know you would feel it.

Your fingers dig into her back.

“I love you,” she says again, softly, like she’s caressing the words with such a reverence that they were bathed in golden ichor. “I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too,” you say back, you let her love you, and it’s the most true thing you’ve ever known.

—-

“Ah, young warriors!” Chiron says, holding his hands out.

Of course, on the tail end of your trip you had encountered tons of little monsters- more amphisbaena, even a juvenile drakon that could barely spit acid. Clarisse had made a dazzling show of killing all of them, and unlike the first amphisbaena- none of them got close enough to touch you.

You had to charmspeak the train conductor, the police officer at the station, and the bus driver. You wonder faintly if your mother had been looking out for you, helping you love Clarisse again.

Of course, all of those instances ended in Clarisse pulling you into the nearest corner.

It’s different, now that you know that you live each other. She still kisses you with that rough deepness, like she’s starved, like she’s trying to breathe you in, but her hands are so soft around you. She holds your waist close to you, not like she just wants to feel you body, but like she just wants to be close to you.

You swing your backpack off of your shoulder, you can feel your mascara smeared down your face from the heat, digging into your bag for the black box.

Chiron smiles and holds his hands out for you to place them in. “You have my thanks,” he says, laying the box into his hand.

You’re surprised when all he does is take out a simple pen. It looks like a nice pen, sure, but still just a pen.

He uncaps it, letting it fall to the concrete, when it suddenly transforms into a sword. You yelp and jump back, Clarisse puts her arm in front of you, and Chiron laughs triumphantly.

“Beautiful!” he says, admiring the carefully crafted sword.

Mr. D dissolves into a fit of laughter. “No more bad blood, huh?”

Clarisse drops her hand from where it reaches for her spear, and her other arm from across your body. Her hands drop to her sides, her face turns back into a mask of indifference and she shrugs.

Mr. D seems to find that even more funny, and Chiron dismisses you with a wave of his hand, staring in awe at the silver sword.

Clarisse presses her lips together into a tight line until you smack a kiss on her cheek.

“Love you,” you sing, and her face breaks out into a wide smile. It’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen, and it’s the only thing you ever want to know. All you need to know is her and her love.

—-

marley when she finds out clarisse and y/n are dating again: if you EVER and i mean EVER hurt her again i will torture you in ways not even imagined yet.

clarisse: ok yes i promise 😟😟

—-

clarisse when she realized she was in love with y/n: NO NO NO NO NEW FEELINGS NO I REJECT THIS AND I MUST RUN AWAY IN FACT THIS WILL NOT HAPPEN NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

also clarisse when she realized she just broke up with y/n: OH GODS NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO WHAT HAVE I DONE NO NO NO NO PLEASE NO NO NO

—-

honorable mention to y/n fuck em’ and hate em’ l/n

another honorable mention to clarisse “none of them got close enough to hurt you” la rue

—-

taglist:

@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies @pnsteblnme @mar2ss @restellsss @ravisinghs-wife @marsconer @evangelinexo @randomhoex @luvrrish

@sincerely-silk @lacytalks

—-

pls ignore it’s for the acc aesthetics thank you!!

#clarisse la rue #clarisse la rue x reader #clarisse la rue x y/n #clarisse la rue x you #pjo tv show #pjo x reader

[absurdthirst]

Puppy Love {Joel Miller x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 12.1k

Warnings: Mentions of pimping someone out, post apocalyptic morality, mentions of violence, guns, biting, infected, death, slapping, angst, anger, Joel being emotionally constipated, declarations of love, unprotected sex, vaginal sex, outdoors sex, pulling out, mentions of pregnancy/infertility

Comments: You always follow Joel Miller around, you've got his back. You're in love with him. Putting up with Tess's nickname of puppy dog, you don't realize that Joel feels for you until the end.

A/N: ~Contains spoilers for Episode 2~ Follows the episode along with some canon divergence.

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

**Follow @absurdthirst-writes and turn on notifications to stay up to date on all new fics.

|| MasterList || Joel Miller MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

Your eyes slide up and down the streets, daring anyone to come closer or ask questions as you clean against the crumbling brick facade and twist your head to look back at the two men huddled together about a hundred feet from where you are. You can’t hear what they’re saying but Joel looks even more pissed off than normal, even for Joel. 

“What?” Joel shakes his head in annoyance, knowing he’s being squeezed for cards. He doesn’t get charged that much for the entire hydro stash he gets from his seller. “No, no fucking battery is worth that much and you know it.” He growls, narrowing his eyes at the untrustworthy weasel in front of him. 

Robert’s eyes slide nervously around and he gives a small shrug, uncomfortable being around Joel and preferring to deal with Tess. “What can I say? Times are hard. It’s getting harder to come by these things.” His greedy eyes shift over to where you are looking out at the street. “Although….I’m sure we could work something out. I could cut the price in half if you, say, let me have your little pet there for the night.” He chuckles, referring to Tess’s mocking nickname for you. ‘Joel’s little puppy dog.’

Joel stares at the other man for a few seconds, just processing what he said, until it finally sinks in. “What the fuck did you just ask for?” He growls, low and quiet so you don’t hear. 

“You heard me, Miller. A night with your little lapdog over there. She’s gotta be good at sucking cock because you keep her around. Got a fucking harem started with her and Tess. Do you have one sit on your face and the other ride your cock?” Robert guesses, crossing his arms with a cocky smirk, “or do they take turns sucking your dick? Mmm if you guarantee me a blowjob, I’ll even throw in some extras.”

You tense slightly, shifting forward from your place leaning against the way. Eyes watching the way that Joel’s fist curls tight for a moment. Wishing that you could hear what the fuck they are saying,  but Joel told you to stay here, so that’s what you’re doing. “Joel?” You call out, getting his attention as he turns his head towards you. You’re wondering if you need to come over, knowing you will throw yourself into a fight for him if needed.

He shakes his head, holding his hand up towards you to stop you. He considers the guys offer, he can’t deny it. It would get him a hell of a lot closer to where he needs to be without having to do several burns for the cards. “No. She’s not available.” He finally says, not wanting to force you into something like that. He might be an evil bastard but he’s not a monster. “She’s not an option.” He decides, “you get more ration cards when we meet for me to collect it.”

“Come on man.” Robert shakes his head and his eyes slide past Joel to leer at you. “It’s just a fucking blowjob. I’ll tell you what?” He huffs, smirking and looking back at Joel. “Let me fuck her, both holes, have her suck my cock and I’ll give you the battery for free. Hell of a deal, right? I’ll even let you watch if you want to.”

Joel can’t help but reach up to squeeze the asshole’s throat. His anger makes him growl as he chokes the prick who dared to violate you like that. “You get the ration cards when I collect it or I can kill you now and get the battery for free? Hell of a deal, right? I’ll even let her watch me kill you.” Joel sasses, tilting his head as he watches his eyes practically bulge.

“Shit!” You leap forward but Joel just turns his head. 

“Stay there!” He orders harshly, making you stop in your tracks. Watching as Joel leans in and whispers something else to the disgusting little rat he was having to buy from to get the battery he needed. 

“No, no, it-it’s good!” You hear Robert choke out, gasping and sputtering when Joel lets him go. Clutching at his throat and coughing as Joel turns around and starts striding back toward you. 

“Let’s go.” He demands, his scowl even deeper than normal as you scramble to catch up with his long legged strides. You weren’t short but he’s speed walking. 

“What the fuck just happened?” You demand, wanting to know what the fuck is going on.

“Don’t worry about it.” Joel growls, body still vibrating with anger. He hates that you were a bargaining chip in this new world. Twenty years ago, it would’ve been illegal but anything goes in this new era, even the things the QZ deems illegal are turned a blind eye to. 

“Did you get the car battery?” You ask and Joel doesn’t look at you, knowing he’s barely holding on to the thread of decency he has when it comes to you. 

“No.” He says without further explanation, “he’s got to locate it.”

“Okay.” You think there is more to it, but he obviously doesn’t want to talk about it. You just walk along beside him, watching some of the people on the street part, giving Joel a wide berth. “So what do we do now?” You ask, unsure if he had other things to take care of.

“We keep low. You seen Tess? I ain’t seen her for a couple of days. Startin’ to get worried.” He frowns, guiding you down the alleyway that takes you back to his building. “I haven’t seen her.” 

You mimic his frown, both wondering where Tess is and hating that he’s so worried about her. It’s always been the two of them. You know they fuck, you know sometimes Tess will sneak into his bed, and you hate it, but you don’t hate Tess. She is capable of a lot in this world and you know she keeps Joel grounded, something you seem unable to do. 

“Let’s head to mine and then we will try to track her down.” Joel says, unaware that Tess is already waiting in his room, her face beaten up and sore.

You sigh softly, knowing that you will do whatever he wants. It’s dumb, but Joel had saved you when you arrived in the QZ, scared off some less than honorable people and you have been drawn to him ever since. It’s hard being in love with a man who doesn’t love you, doesn’t even look at you like a woman, but you are loyal to him. He claims he’s not a good man, and that’s true at times, but he’s good to you. “We’ll find her. I’m sure she’ll be in your arms tonight.” You mutter, hating how your stomach twists in jealousy.

Joel pretends to not hear you, knowing you and Tess have some tension going on between you but he ignores it. This life is rough enough without needing to fucking deal with women drama. He gets what he needs when he wants and that’s all that matters to him. He rolls his eyes and strides a little faster to get to his room. 

When he opens the door, Tess is sitting there with her face bruised and swollen and he’s ready to fucking kill whoever did that to her.

“Jesus.” You huff, eyes wide at her injuries. It’s on the tip of your tongue to make a snarky comment, but instead you watch Joel fuss over her and clean up the wounds with the bottle of alcohol sitting next to the sink. It would be touching if it didn’t break your heart. “What the fuck happened to you?” You ask finally as he’s dabbing at the corner of her mouth. You flop down on his sofa and glare at your feet.

Joel gently grips her chin as he cleans her up, his eyes burning into hers and he doesn’t hear your question, too busy making sure Tess is okay. Neither of them see the crestfallen look on your face until your scowl covers it. Tess sighs, gently pushing Joel’s hand away as she explains that she was held hostage by a couple of Robert’s goons. Joel hisses in annoyance, knowing he should’ve killed that asshole when he had the chance.

You hate how neither one of them includes you, feeling like an extra wheel. Dragging your feet off the coffee table you slap your hands on your thighs and stand. “Since she’s home, I guess I better do the same.” You want Joel to tell you to stay, but you know he won’t. Wondering why you put yourself through this torture when he only had eyes for Tess.

Joel wants to ask you to stay but he needs to talk to Tess about what happened. He needs to form a plan and you distract him. “See you later.” He tells you, not even looking your way and Tess offers you a slight smirk as she bids you goodbye. Joel tuts when you stomp out, slamming the door behind you. “Tess…” He murmurs, shaking his head. 

“What? She’s like a damn puppy dog hanging around you all the time.” 

Joel snorts, “what does that make you?”

Tess frowns for a moment before she leans forward. “You know what I am to you.” She challenges him, holding his gaze until he turns away. You have fucked everything up, everything was fine until you showed up and things changed. “Joel-“ She pauses, deciding against asking a question she doesn’t want to know the answer to, or at least have it confirmed. Instead she decides to change tactics. “We need to go find Robert and our battery.”

Joel nods, “we do. I’ll go find her and then we can get ahead. Get your shit together.” He orders, standing up and making his way out of the door to track you down. He needs you for backup and also, he is secretly amused at the way Tess frowns whenever you are mentioned. Tess is…Tess is a comfort to him, the woman who has seen him at his worst and still wants him. 

You are innocent really, still able to fight but you haven’t seen that side of him. He doesn’t want you to. He wants you to think of him as the closest version to the person he used to be. He misses that person sometimes, grieves him almost as much as he grieves Sarah. The small things he’d bitch about, like money or working late, are trivial compared to the issues he faces today. 

When he finds you, you are sulking in your room, “come on. I need you to help me and Tess track down Robert and his goons.”

Staring at him incredulously, you huff after a moment, bending down to pick up your boots. “You’ve got some fucking nerve, Miller.” You grumble, feeling like you are being taken advantage of right now. Joel doesn’t comment, just sends you a satisfied look as you put your boots on and turns towards the door. 

“Get your pack, we might need it.” He tells you before he walks out of your rooms like he owns the damn things. Your fault for letting him in, your fault for being so fucking in love with him that you let him walk all over you. 

“This is the last goddamn time.” You promise yourself, muttering angrily as you get ready. 

Joel doesn’t say anything, just raises his eyebrows as he listens outside. Both you and he know that’s not true. When you’re ready, he guides you down the alleyways to meet up with Tess. “Right. Let’s go get this fucker. I’m sick of his bullshit.” Joel huffs, making his way through the alleys to find the place Tess detailed when she told him where she was held.

“Awwww, you decided to come along, I’m so touched.” Tess coos mockingly when you reach her, making you grit your teeth and want to punch her in her good eye. 

“Well, someone has to clean up your mess.” You huff back. 

“Enough.” Joel growls, shaking his head at you before he turns to Tess with a pointed look. They did that a fucking lot, silently communicate like you weren’t fucking there.

Tess nods and Joel leads the way, entering the building with gun in hand and he creeps down the hall, using hand signals to gesture for you to walk or stop. He knows you and Tess have some fucking women issues between you but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t have time for that trivial shit.

It’s not the time to be snarky. Instead of dwelling on the issues, you focus on the task at hand. All you care about is keeping Joel safe. Tess by extension just because you know that he would be upset if something happened to her. She was his woman, not you. Your own gun in your hand, you flank his left side as you follow, eyes peeled for any danger. 

Joel is naturally anxious, keeping his eyes open and ears clear for any noises. When he spots the dead bodies of Robert and his goons, he doesn’t give a fuck. He wants to know who did that to them. When the door to his right suddenly opens, he doesn’t think. He just acts. Shoving the girl against the wall so she drops the knife and placing his foot on it, gun aimed at her. When Marlene appears, Joel narrows his eyes, listening as she begs him not to shoot.

Your fingers tense around your own weapon, aimed at the two fireflies in front of you. “What’s who he sold our battery to? The Che Guevara of Boston?” You roll your eyes at her humor but it’s true. Listening to her tell Joel that they need to take this girl to the state house to meet her group. “Bring your puppy with you too.” You hiss at that, pissed off that Tess’s fucking nickname for you has caught on. “I tried to recruit her, but she’s too loyal to you Joel.” 

Joel conceals the way his heart flutters at the news that you wanted to stay loyal to him. His face remains impassive and the girl tries to get her knife back while Marlene points out that she is bleeding and he needs to hurry up and decide. “Fine.” He grunts after Tess states her case.

Huffing, you shake your head. “You two have fun with that.” You know it’s a bad idea. This is bullshit and there are other places to get a battery. 

“You’re going with us.” Joel tells you sternly and you know that you will, if for anything but to watch his back. 

“We don’t need her. Joel. She’ll just be a liability.” Tess barely spares you a glance and that pisses you off more. 

“I’m going.” You hiss, glaring at her.

Joel doesn't need this catty bullshit, the girl is glaring at him and it's putting him on edge. "Fine. Get your shit kid, we are leaving." He orders the girl, Ellie, who goes to get her knife back with a scowl. When night falls, Joel guides the group through the old tunnel that he uses to smuggle things in and once you're outside the QZ, Ellie's eyes widen. 

"Holy shit." She gasps and a truck drives by. 

"Get down!" Joel hisses, forcing you to duck alongside Ellie.

“Jesus.” You hate being outside the QZ. Hate the risk and you know that it’s getting harder and harder every time. “We need to move. The fucking soldiers have been crawling around.” You murmur quietly, looking around and shivering slightly in the rain. 

Just as you get ready to move, the QZ guard who buys from Joel approaches you, gun raised. Joel doesn’t even think, surging forward to start pummeling the guy to death. He’s feral and there’s nothing any of you can do except watch him. Ellie watches with a fascination while Tess stares impassively.

“Joel.” You know the man is capable of violence, you’ve seen it, but this was unhinged. He turns back to look at the girl and you, the expression on his face is fierce and you shake your head after Tess shows him the red scanner. She’s infected. You listen to the hurried explanations and you know you need to have this conversation somewhere else. “We need to go.” You tell him, picking up the knife that the kid had stuck in the bastard’s leg and handing it back to her. You don’t know about her claim that she’s immune, but she deserves to be able to protect herself out here. “Take the rifle.”

  Ellie takes it and Joel is almost dazed as you walk through the debris and overgrowth to find shelter in the city. Once you’ve found where you usually stop, Joel slumps down in the chair, flexing his knuckles and hissing. Ellie looks exhausted and you tell her to get some sleep, you’re stopping here for the night. “She’s infected.” Joel grunts when she’s fast asleep, bringing yours and Tess’s eyes over to him.

“Her wound looked healed.” Of course it had been dark as shit, but bites from the infected never looked better. It’s always inflamed as the fungal infection spreads through the body, taking over. You glance at his knuckles, wishing that you had ice to put on it. “You should wrap it up.” You tell him.

Joel ignores you, just imagining what could’ve happened out there if that asshole had blabbed. You’d all be dead. Hung for treason or some bullshit like that. “I’m fine.” He finally answers and Tess looks over at him, “she’s right.” That Joel definitely ignores. He grunts, standing up, “I’ll take first watch. You two get some sleep. I’ll watch the girl.” He says, grabbing his rifle and ignoring the pain in his knuckles when he grips the handle.

You sigh, knowing it won’t make a damn bit of difference, but you find yourself a corner away from the door so you have time to react and lay your pack down. Using it as a pillow as you turn your back to Joel and Tess. You don’t want to see whatever else they do or talk about tonight, tired of being the third wheel and tired of feeling like you should just leave.

Joel keeps watch most of the night until Tess tells him to get half an hour. “Lazy bitch couldn’t even get up for a watch.” She scoffs at your sleeping form. 

Joel shakes his head at her, “she didn’t sleep the night before. Trying to help me out by keeping an ear out for the radio. Just - let it, okay?” Joel asks and Tess snorts, nodding her head. He sits down, closing his eyes but he never truly relaxes, just rests until the sun starts to rise. 

“What do we do with the girl?” Tess asks when he stands up, walking over to her. 

“Kill her.” Joel says, knowing that Marlene wouldn’t find out. He could lie and say she got infected for real this time. It’s not far from the truth. “We don’t know if she’s gonna turn.” He murmurs, keeping his eyes on the curled up ball in the middle of the room.

Grunting, you wake up with a jolt, used to the nightmares that plague your sleep. Everyone in the fucking horror reality has them, or they’ve never lived outside the QZ they were born in. Flipping over, you notice that Joel and Tess are already awake, both of them watching the girl. “Shoulda woke me.” You grumble, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from your eyes before you shuffle over towards Joel.

“You needed the sleep.” Joel murmurs, ignoring the scoff from Tess. “We should kill her.” Joel says with finality just as the girl wakes up, glancing around to see you sitting up and Joel sitting there with his rifle aimed towards her, anxious and tense as hell. “You make one wrong move and I’ll kill ya.” He promises, making Ellie scoff and pull her sleeve up. 

“I’m fine. No different than last night.”

You shift slightly, looking from Joel to Ellie. “Why didn’t she kill you?” You demand, asking about Marlene. Ellie explains about the daily testing and holds out her arm to show that it is perfectly steady. No tremor, which is normally the first sign of infection besides a bite. “Jesus.” You shake your head, unsure of what all of these means and look back towards Joel. It’s him she needs to convince. Or Tess rather because she can sway Joel’s opinion.

Joel considers not killing Ellie when Tess points out that it hasn’t spread. “Fine. Better get something to eat before we head out.” Joel says, sitting down, and he flexed his knuckles. 

“Broken?” Tess asks and he shrugs, “hairline. It will heal fast.” 

You frown at that but still get your jerky out of your pack. 

Ellie, meanwhile, pulls out a delicious looking sandwich and your eyes widen. “Is that chicken?” Tess asks and Ellie explains how Marlene got it from smugglers. Joel snorts, chewing on his jerky and trying to ignore the pain in his hand.

You hate that he is hurting, knowing that he can’t take anything that would help because it would make him slower to react. Instead of offering to take the gun, you open your pack and offer him the precious bottle of aspirin you have. It took a month of ration cards to get it, and you normally used it when your cramps would get too bad. “Here.” You offer quietly, “to help with the swelling.”

Joel takes the pill, knowing it’s aspirin and trusting you. He swallows it dry and makes the decision to head out. “Let’s go. We need to take advantage of the daylight.” He says, standing up to grab his pack and the rifle. Ellie scrambles to pack up her pack again and soon enough, you are heading outside with Tess keeping close to Joel.

“Do we want to take the long way or the short way?” Joel asks and it’s not your opinion he’s actually asking for. Tess snorts. 

“You mean the long way or sure to die way.” She corrects sarcastically, making Ellie’s eyes widen dramatically and you roll your own. You’ve been the short way and it’s fine as long as you pay attention. 

“I vote for the long way given the small amount of information available.” Ellie huffs, making you smirk. 

“The long way, fast.” You decide. “Sooner we get her to the state house, the sooner you have the truck you need to get to Tommy.” That’s what all this is about after all, getting to his brother.

Joel nods, agreeing with you. You, Tess, and the girl trail behind him. Joel hears Tess telling the kid about Boston and the wreck it is now, but he isn't really listening, too busy scanning the area for any threats: human or infected. 

He walks into the hotel and Ellie is amazed. "Wow. Did you guys ever stay somewhere like this?" She asks and Joel snorts while Tess says, "it was a bit out of our price range." You can't help but snort when Joel sasses the kid by hopping down onto the last step. 

"Come on." You urge her forward and she rambles on about the hotel. When she rings the bell, Joel rolls his eyes and you shrug, offering him a look of amusement.

Halfway through the lobby when Ellie screams, you turn around and rush back through the water, unsure if it’s a clicker. Relieved when Joel isn’t shouting and shooting, you find the decayed bones of an unfortunate bastard floating. He must have moved and scared the girl. You hum, watching as Joel offers her his hand, something that he wouldn’t have done if he didn’t somewhat believe her story about not being infected, so it bodes well for her. “Come on kid,” you offer, giving her a small smile. “Let’s go up to the rooms. We’ve got a hell of a climb.” 

Once you climb the ridiculous amount of stairs, Joel curses when he finds the exit has caved in. “Fuck.” He grunts. 

“I can fit through. Let me try and get through.” Tess says and Joel shakes his head, “we can go the short way.” 

Tess huffs, “we don’t have time. I’ll be fine.” She promises and starts to climb through the debris. You hover near Ellie, trying to ignore the way your heart pangs at their secret look, only between them. It makes you feel like you’re a thousand miles away from them. Ellie slumps down on the floor and Joel follows suit, looking over at you while Ellie starts to ask him questions.

You fiddle with your gun, trying not to feel like you are stuck in the middle of a Q&A that you don’t want to be at. Snickering to yourself when Ellie sasses back at Joel that she knows where Detroit is. Only to be surprised moments later when Joel actually knows where you are from. You had only told him once and assumed that he had forgotten or didn’t care enough. “So you and her are….” Joel’s entire body tenses. 

“Pass.” Of course he wouldn’t define their relationship, he doesn’t ever acknowledge things Tess says in front of you, but he doesn’t deny them either. 

Ellie huffs and turns her inquisitive eyes towards you. “So that means you and her are……” She trails off, trying to get either one of you to fill in the gaps. 

Joel grunts, “pass.” He doesn’t want to talk about you or Tess with Ellie. 

“Are you- is it like a throuple situation?” She guesses and Joel snorts, “nope.” 

You and Tess would kill each other before you fuck each other. “Absolutely not.” You wrinkle your nose at being with Tess. God, she gets under your skin but she is important to Joel. 

“Rightttt.” Ellie drawls just as there’s a thumping on the door. Joel stands up, gun in hand, anxious until Tess shouts her announcement that she’s back. Joel sighs slightly, relieved to see Tess, and he gestures for you and Ellie to get your shit.

Your stomach knots, knowing that the hardest part is coming up but there is something calming about the view from the terrace. Looking out over the ruins of the city that you had wished to have visited before all of the world went to shit. Tess pulls back the heavy plastic curtain so Ellie can get her first look and you walk up to the ledge. 

Ellie has to step up on the little ledge and she looks down at the courtyard below. “There’s so many of them.” Ellie exhales, looking at that view. You shift to stand next to her, Joel on the other side. Tess starts to talk, explaining the way the fungus spreads. “They’re connected.” Tess hums. “More than you know.” Joel looks over at you and meets your eyes for a second. 

You wish that he cared about you, but he doesn’t. You tear your eyes away from his and listen to Tess tell Ellis about how the tendrils spread underground, alerting other infected to your location. “You’re not immune from being ripped apart.” Tess cautions her. “You understand?” For a moment, the woman you hold such a grudge against seems almost motherly and you wish that she could talk to you with half the kindness, although you know you’ve not been exactly nice to her. Your feelings for Joel getting in the way of that.

“So we’re not going that way.” Ellie huffs and you shake your head, knowing what’s coming. “Short way?” She asks, looking between the three of you and you look to Joel for his opinion. 

“Museum.” He decides, making you roll your shoulders in anticipation of the problems ahead. 

You are anxious, preparing yourself to enter the museum and Joel glances at you, "be careful." He tells you softly, ignoring the glance from Tess. He opens the door, pleased after discovering the fungal roots are dry. He enters the Bostonian Museum, keeping his gun raised and ready.

Blowing out a soft breath, you grip your gun in your hand tightly and keep your head on a swivel as you watch your steps. The museum is dark and all you have for light is the flashlights, the kid breathing heavily at your back and you swear you hear her huff under her breath because Joel wouldn’t let her have a gun. She looks around, taking in the scene as the old building creaks and groans around you. “Yeah, cooked.” Joel says and Tess grunts. 

“Finally some fucking luck.” Ellie steps forward, almost carelessly at their conversation. “I guess we should have gone this way in the first place.” Joel hums, not watching as Ellie turns a corner. 

“Oh shit!” You rush over and shine another light on the body she discovered, groaning to yourself when you see that the person has been ripped up. Knowing what causes that. “What the fuck did that?” She demands, making you shush her quickly. You look over at Tess and Joel, the other woman looking nervous. 

“Maybe.” Tess whispers. “Maybe he was attacked outside. Crawled through the door, the door was open. It could have been him.” She insists, making you roll your eyes and scoff quietly. She knows that’s not what happened. 

“I don’t hear anything.” She insists. “What would you hear?” Ellie demands, her voice at a normal volume and all three of you turn towards her to quiet her down.

Joel holds his hand up, telling Ellie to quieten down. “What would you hear?” She repeats in a whisper, “you saying an infected did that?” Tess shushes her and you bite your lip. “-because I’ve been attacked by one and it wasn’t like that.” Ellie looks back at the body. 

“Okay from this point forward we are silent. Not quiet, silent.” 

Ellie shakes her head “what-” 

Joel cuts her off, “no questions. Just do it.” Joel is anxious, always tense when he’s in closed spaces, and he slowly makes his way up the stairs. It’s difficult to move so slow but he is careful when he steps on the dried fungus. He manages to make it up the stairs and onto the second floor. He opens the door, walking in with his gun ready. The ceiling collapses and Tess shoves Ellie forward, pushing her into you and the three of you fall onto the floor. Joel helps Ellie up and that’s when you hear it. A clicker.

Shit. Your gun comes up and you immediately move in front of Ellie, flanking Joel to his left and Tess to his right. You’re trapped in a room with a fucking clicker. You don’t dare to breathe, barely creeping forward since they rely on hearing, totally blind with the large, hard fungal growth covering their heads. You hear her breathing start to pick up and you turn to find her wide as you realize there is more than one. All of you crouch down behind a display and Joel motions to Ellie that they rely on hearing. You can see the terror on her face, making the way your heart is pounding in your chest. Joel puts his finger to his lips again as they continue to make horrible screeches and clicks as they search for the source of the sounds. The clicker comes around the display and the little girl sees it for the first time, inhaling sharply. 

Shit. The clicker turns and screeches before Joel brings his gun up to shoot it. 

It’s terrifying, fighting for your life, and you are scared that Joel is gonna get bitten. You scramble to shoot the clicker but eventually you run out of bullets. Joel curses, “fucking go.” He hisses, “I’ll distract it.” You rush to hide around a corner to reload your gun. The girl and Tess are across the room and your hands shake as you struggle to reload your weapon. “

Fuck.” You hiss and Joel comes to stand beside you, doing the same thing. His eyes are full of fear and you stare back at him until you hear the clicks.

Your eyes close for a brief second, well aware that this could be it for you. You hate it. The fact that you could die in this fucking museum and never find Tommy. Never tell Joel how you feel. The floorboards creak and you hear the clicks right next to you. Another sound draws its attention and you turn to watch it, finding Ellie cowering behind a display and both you and Joel creep over to her. Making your way silently until Joel steps on a piece of broken glass. You cry out and start shooting as the clicker flies over the display and knocks all three of you to the ground, trying to infect you as you fight it off. 

Joel curses, scrambling to keep the clicker away from you and Ellie and himself. It’s a struggle but eventually he manages to push it aside and put a bullet in its neck and eventually it’s face. Just as that one falls, the other rushes forward and Tess swings an axe into its head. Joel scrambles to grab his rifle, shooting the bastard in the head to kill it. “You alright?” Joel asks Tess as she stands. 

“Twisted ankle.” 

He turns to you, eyes wide and asks you the same question. “I’m fine.” You answer and Tess asks Ellie who exhales shakily, “well I didn’t shit my pants.”

You can’t help but laugh at her response, knowing you felt the same way the first time you dealt with clickers. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Turning back towards the kid, your eyes widen when you see that she’s injured again. “Ah…I mean if it was going to happen to one of us.” 

You catch the way that Tess tenses up, making you frown slightly but she’s quickly redirecting the conversation. “Hey, let’s get out of here.”

Making your way onto the roof, it’s obvious that Tess needs medical attention. Joel hands Ellie a rag for her arm and turns his attention to Tess. Leaving you to walk over to the other girl and help her while he concentrates on wrapping her ankle. “Come here. I’ll help you.” It will be a good distraction, tending to her wound rather than watching Joel fret over a twisted ankle. Soon her arm is wrapped and she’s walking towards the edge and the scaffolding that connects the two buildings. “Over there?” She asks and Joel barely glances at her. “Yeah, I know it looks scary.” Joel starts but Ellie interrupts him. “That was scary, this is wood.” She huffs as she brazenly walks across the beam and makes you smirk at the other two adults. 

"Just wait there. Give us a minute." Joel says and you step to follow Ellie across the wood, not wanting to see the tenderness Joel gifts Tess with. "Be careful." Joel warns you while opening his backpack. You scoff, walking across the wood as brazenly as Ellie. Joel shakes his head, while he tapes Tess's ankle. 

"Told you, she's trouble." Her eyes focus on Joel but he doesn't notice, set on the job at hand. "There's probably more ahead." 

Tess nods, "so we'll deal with it then...I got it. I got it." She tells Joel when he wraps around her ankle again. 

Joel leans back to look at Tess until his gaze turns to the building across from them. "What about the kid?" He asks, "maybe the first bite didn't take but what about the second?" 

Tess huffs, turning towards him, "why don't you just take the good news? Can you do that?" She asks Joel, "can you just for once think that we might actually win?" Tess asks and shakes her head, "just go and watch her and your fucking puppy." 

Joel sighs, grabbing his backpack and rifle before making his way across the wood. “Wow.” Ellie exhales, looking at that view. You shift to stand next to her, Joel on the other side. 

“Is that everything you hoped for?” Joel asks Ellie as you stare across what used to be a major city now turned to a deserted urban jungle. 

“Jury’s still out.” Ellie replies back, “but man…you can’t deny that view.” You hum in agreement and Joel looks at Ellie before his eyes meet yours for a second.

“Tess gonna live?” You ask, breaking the moment up but you hate how his eyes seem to suck you in. It’s not going to happen for you and you need to accept that. You’ve already decided that when Joel and Tess get their vehicle from the Fireflies, you are going to stay. You’ll go with them or turn around and find a way back to the QZ. You can’t do this anymore. It’s too hard and you know that it will never be you that he picks. Stupid of you to fall for a man who was obviously involved with someone whether or not he admitted it. Joel rolls his eyes, not answering you and you swallow harshly. “When we get to the state house-” You start, wanting to tell him your plan, but Tess comes hobbling up. 

“Come on, let's get there before it’s dark” She demands, impatient to get moving again as she swings herself onto the ladder. 

Ellie goes next and then you look at Joel who nods at you. You nod and make your way down the ladder, firm in your decision. Joel glances at his watch, thinking about Sarah, and forces himself to keep going. As you walk towards the state building, Joel glances down at Ellie’s arm. Cautious and wondering if she’s gonna turn at any second. When you arrive, there’s no one there and you duck behind a car to see if anyone shows. “Where the fuck are they?” Tess asks and Joel shakes his head, looking back at Tess before his eyes meet yours. 

He stands, rifle in his grip, and he makes his way over to the truck. Cautious and alert, he opens the passenger door and turns back to you, Tess and Ellie. “Stay back.” He orders, making his way around the truck to find the back is empty.

“Joel, what the fuck is going on?” You, Tess and Ellie come towards the truck and Joel shakes his head. 

“I don’t know.” 

You look around, a bad feeling settling in the pit of your stomach. “They went inside.” Ellie tells you, pointing to the blood on the ground and you sigh, knowing that is never a good sign. 

Tess seems to take this as a personal attack and grabs Ellie’s hand as she marches towards the steps. “Tess.” Joel huffs, making you roll your eyes but you follow are the pair. Not for Tess’s sake, but for the girls. You know Joel will be right behind you. You walk into the state house, finding all of the crew dead on the floor in the middle of a vegetation patch. 

“Holy shit.” Ellie hisses, and you have to agree. This is bad. 

“Fuck.” You hiss under your breath, checking for signs of FEDRA or if it was infected that got them. 

Tess searches the bodies, “I mean there’s gotta be a fucking radio or something, right?” She says, searching the crate closest to her. 

“Who killed them? FEDRA?” Ellie asks and you shrug, glancing back at Joel who pulls the body at his feet back onto its back. 

“No. One of them got bit. The healthy ones fought the sick ones. Everyone lost. Tess? What’re you doin’?” He asks, turning back towards her as she continues searching. 

Tess steps towards the girl and you edge your way in front of her to protect her. “Where did Marlene say that she was taking you? Ellie!” 

The girl steps forward, “uh. I don’t know. Just west.” 

Tess turns away, “just west. Fuck. Okay. Well, I mean one of them’s gotta have a map on them, right?” She says more to herself. “Joel, can you help me?” She asks, nearly begging. 

Joel shakes his head, “no! Tess, it’s over. We are going home.” He walks towards her, wanting to get everyone back to the QZ and safe. 

Tess growls, “that’s not my fucking home.” Joel stares at her, eyes unreadable as Tess stands up. “I’m stayin’.” She declares, “I mean, our luck had to run out sooner or later.” 

Joel’s face falls and your eyes widen just as Ellie says, “fuck. She’s infected.” Joel turns back to Tess, staring at her, almost begging her with his eyes for that to not be true.

“Show me.” Joel demands and you can hear the agony in the two words. He doesn’t want to believe it, doesn’t want it to be true. Your stomach drops, hating that she has been infected despite your differences. It didn’t mean you wanted her dead. 

“Joel.” She takes a step towards him and instinctively, he jolts backwards, pulling away from her. You walk towards the kid and put your arm around her shoulder gently, wanting to comfort her. Tess pulls her jacket away so you can see the bite on her neck and you close your eyes. “Oops.” She jokes. “Right?’ She turns to Ellie. “Take your bandage off.” You help Ellie take the bandage off to reveal that her own wounds from the clickers haven’t gotten any worse. She’s not infected. Walking over, she takes the girl's arm. “Look, Joel.” She demands, holding it up for  him to inspect. “This is real. Joel she’s fucking real.” She insists. “I need you to get her to Bill and Franks.” 

“No,” Joel shakes his head. 

“They’ll  take her off your hands. They’ll handle it from here.” 

“No, no, no, I can’t. They won’t take her. They’re not going to take her.” He frowns. 

“They will ‘cause you’ll convince them.” Tess tells him. “Yes you will. I never ask you for anything. Not to feel the way I felt…” You frown in confusion, not understanding what the fuck she is talking about. Joel loves her. 

“No.” Joel shakes his head but Tess interrupts him. 

“Not to…shut the fuck up because I don’t have time.” Joel looks devastated and you clutch Ellie’s shoulder as you try not to react to this entire scene being played out in front of you. 

“This is your chance. You get her there, you keep her alive, and you set everything right. I know you don’t feel the same way I do but you need to stop burying your feelings. Life is too damn short to keep lying to yourself.” Tess says, her eyes meeting yours before she looks back at Joel’s. “All the shit we did…” She looks over at you, “he was gonna offer you up to Robert. He was gonna trade sex with you for the battery we needed.” 

Your jaw drops and Joel refuses to look at you, keeping his gaze on Tess’s. “Little puppy dog, always following him around. Thinkin’ you were the third wheel when it was always me.” Tess chuckles humorlessly and shakes her head. “Please say yes, Joel, please.” Tess begs and Joel’s gaze shifts over to you. 

The way you’re looking at him is enough to make him say no. He wants to protect you, protect the girl. He can’t do that if he takes you both to Bill and Frank’s. “Please.” Tess begs again just as the body behind Ellie shifts to crawl. 

“Oh fuck!” The teenager yells and ducks behind you and Joel when you move her out of the way. Joel doesn’t hesitate to take his gun out, killing the bastard, and his jaw is clenched when he sees the fungus curling around the dead digits. He looks towards the door and rushes past Tess to open it. Eyes panicked when he looks back after shutting the door. 

“How many?” Tess asks. 

“All of them. Maybe a minute.” Joel says, spinning around in a panic to face you but you refuse to meet his eye.

Tess gets to work, pushing over the barrels of gasoline, spilling it over the ornate tile floor. “What are you doing?” You ask and Tess answers with “making sure they don’t follow you.” 

Joel is frozen, facing the reality that the woman who’s been his right hand for so long is not walking out of this building with him. He steps closer to her, grenades roll across the floor. “Joel.” Tess moves to stand in front of him. “Joel.” She repeats and he finally meets her gaze. “Save who you can save.” She orders, her eyes flicking over to you before she meets his dark stare. 

He’s struggling. Part of him wants to drag Tess out of here but the other side of him wants to keep you safe. He’s torn and eventually, the side of the living wins. He stares at Tess, offering her a small nod, and he spins, grabbing Ellie’s hand and wrapping his arm around your waist. “Stop! We’re not leaving her. Get off of me you fucker! I’m not going with you!” Ellie shouts and you let Joel drag you out of the building. He’s frantic to get you away before the building explodes with Tess inside of it. 

“Hurry up.” He growls, dragging you both until you’re far enough away. He ducks down as the glass explodes, shoving you on the floor, and he grabs his rifle to aim it in case any infected chase after you. 

Ellie stands beside him, watching their bodies fall to the floor with the flames, and Joel eventually lowers the gun. “Joel…” You trail off and he shakes his head, turning to walk away. Ellie lingers for a moment until you step forward to follow him.

Your jaw rocks and you shake your head, unable to believe that he had refused to even talk to you after Tess dropped that bomb on you. At least she told you before she died, even though it was supposed to be one last barb through your heart. “I’m not going.” You decide, stopping short, only a few hundred feet from where you had watched the building explode. “This is your mission. For Tess.” You turn around and start walking back the way you just came, sure that the infected will be burned now given the size of the fire bomb and the smoke still billowing from the building.

Joel pauses, watching you for a moment until he strides forward to grab your wrist, pulling you back to stop you walking away. “You ain’t going anywhere. It’s too dangerous. Stop movin’.” He growls when you try to pull out of his grip. “I don’t understand. What - why you wanna go back?”

Instead of trying to pull out of his grip, you spin around, slapping him across his cheek. “You fucking bastard!” You hiss, yanking your wrist away from him as he loosens his grip in shock. “You were going to- going to fucking sell me to Robert for your fucking battery!” Hot tears spill down your cheeks and you don’t even bother wiping them away. “I knew you didn’t-“ you break off, “fuck you, Miller.”

Joel is shocked that you slapped him and he hisses, “Jesus Christ.” He curses Tess despite her soul not even leaving the damn earth yet. “I didn’t sell you. He wanted you and I said no. I fuckin’ told him no.” He clarifies, ignoring the wide eyed look from Ellie. 

“Tell me you didn’t think about it.” You challenge him, chest heaving as you step closer and square up to him. “Tell me that you didn’t consider it.” Joel doesn’t answer you and your chin trembles when you see the guilt in his eyes. “I thought so.” You choke out. “I fucking loved you and you were going to whore me out to save money and get your goddamn battery.”

He shakes his head, “no baby. I didn’t - I didn’t do it though.” He chokes, knowing you hate him and he doesn’t know why that destroys him when he’s fought so hard to keep you at arms length. “You can’t love me, okay? I’m - I’m a fucking mess and I was fooling around with Tess until I realized that I -” He cuts himself off, knowing that it’s getting dangerous.

“Until you what? Couldn’t whore her out?” You spit, shaking your head at him. “I put up with the stupid fucking nickname. ‘Puppy dog’.” You sneer. “Guess that’s what I was, huh? A stupid little puppy dog that doesn’t fucking realize she’s not wanted. Following you around, helping you, trying to make you- fuck, I don’t know.” You lift your hands helplessly and slap them down against your thighs. “Make you love me, I guess. But that’ll never happen. I’m not Tess.” You close your eyes, and sigh. “Just- go to take Ellie where Tess wanted you to, go find your brother. I’ll- I’ll be fine. I’m not your problem.”

He knows he will lose you forever if he lets you go now and he’s lost so much in his life. The burden he carries every damn day with each life he loses around him. He can’t lose you too. He brushes over what you said to finish his own sentence. “I was fooling around with Tess until I realized that I was fuckin’ in love with you and Jesus fuckin’ Christ that terrifies me.” He confesses, chest heaving.

You frown, not believing him for a second. “Don’t lie to me, Joel.” You sob out angrily. “You at least owe me the fucking truth.” 

Ellie steps forward. “Hey so, uh- it’s-“ 

You turn around and glare at her. “Not now!” You hiss, wanting to finish this so you can leave and find some place to hole up for the night before sneaking back into the QZ. “She was practically living in your apartment. She was there every damn night. Now you want to tell me you weren’t fucking her?”

“I stopped. We weren’t - we were plannin’ the smuggling. We weren’t doing shit other than figurin’ out how to get shit past the wall, past FEDRA. Jesus, sweetheart, I didn’t - I don’t want to put you in danger. I’ve been tryin’ to keep you safe. Tess knew how I feel. Shit, she was jealous and that’s why she called you my puppy dog. I should’ve stopped it but doing that wouldn’t meant acknowledging these fuckin’ feelings that I’ve been tryin’ to squash down. Love doesn’t succeed in this goddamn hellhole. Love is a weakness and I - shit - you make me weaker than a paper straw under a one ton weight.”

You don’t know if you believe him. The sting of finding out that he had even thought about giving you to Robert, even for a moment, stings. But you know it would be safer for Ellie if there was more than one capable adult looking out for her ass. There’s enough of you that immediately wants to forgive Joel that you stare into his dark eyes for a moment before you nod. “Fine.” You whisper. “I’ll….go with you on this fucking haul.” 

Joel is relieved that you are coming along. He knows this conversation isn’t over but you need to get moving. Get to some kind of shelter before it gets dark. “Come on baby. We can talk later. Let’s get safe first.” He says, grabbing his rifle. Ellie raises her eyebrows at him as he walks past her. 

“Never knew you were so emotional, Joel.” She scoffs, remembering the books that would be passed around in secret at the school about romance and how the guy would kiss the girl after declaring he loved her.

Instead of following directly behind Joel,  you put the girl between you and him. Bringing up the rear for safety as well as to give you some space to allow for thinking about what the fuck you are going to do. You know Joel isn’t a ‘good man’ in the pre-end of the world morality. Maybe he was then, but this life, this world changed everyone - you included. You don’t even know as much as Tess might have, but you know that he had saved you when he could have killed you. That he didn’t give you to Robert. Biting your lip, you wonder if that’s why he was choking the bastard the day before yesterday. Not that it mattered, the fucker was dead. Sighing softly, you shift your gaze around the fading light to look for somewhere to safely pass the night. 

Joel guides you through the forest that is invading Boston, nature taking back what is rightfully hers. Joel sighs, holding his rifle, until he comes around a sheltered area. It’s not comfortable but it’s safe and that’s all that matters. “We will set up here.” He declares, watching the tree line for any disturbances and when he doesn’t find any, he shrugs his pack off.

You don’t speak, just shrug off your own pack and set it down as you start to get the area ready for the night. While the infected weren’t in this area, wild animals were. A fire would be necessary to keep them from getting too close and you know that the sun will be setting soon. You start to drag trash and debris closer, scrapping out an area to start the fire and pile things high. Joel can’t move much, not with his hand even though he would protest over it. 

Joel watches you start the fire and Ellie sits down on the ground, opening her pack to pull her sandwich out. She’s starving and she doesn’t want to wait to eat. When you’ve started the fire, Joel pulls out his food and water, holding it out towards you. “You gotta eat, sweetheart.” He says, watching you sit down across from him. He will mourn Tess later when he takes watch. He doesn’t want to show his emotions now when you’ve shattered him with your onslaught.

Shaking your head, you don’t take his offerings. “You need it more than me.” You tell him as you reach for your own pack. “I have my own but I just-” You bite your lip. “I’m going to sleep first. You take first watch and wake me in a few hours.” You don’t let him argue, setting your pack up as a pillow and turning your back on him and the girl, curling in on yourself and forcing yourself to close your eyes. 

He doesn’t argue, knowing you need to rest and he needs time to think. Ellie looks at him as he starts to chew on the jerky and he ignores her raised eyebrows. “Don’t say a word, kid.” He orders, shaking his head after he swallows the chewy bark. 

Ellie rolls her eyes, “whatever dude. You can’t see what’s right in front of you. What Tess saw.” She says and continues eating. Joel grimaces, thinking of Tess. He tried to hide how he felt about you from her, thinking he had been successful but he wasn’t.

You don’t know how long you’ve been asleep, but your jerk awake with a gasp. Your hand reaches for the gun that is right next to you and you flip over to try to figure out what woke you. The fire is still burning and the kid is curled but about five feet from you, wedged between the concrete wall and the fire. Joel is still awake, his eyes watching as you sit up. “Shit.” You huff, putting the gun down and blinking rapidly. “Get some sleep, I’ll take over.” You promise, groaning quietly as you move to your feet to stretch.

Joel shakes his head, “no. I wanna talk. Come here.” He pats the space beside him, wanting you to come and sit down. 

You hesitate but eventually sit down beside him. “What is it Joel?” You murmur, not wanting to rehash this bullshit. 

“Shut up.” He orders and you open your mouth. “Shut the fuck up.” He hisses, pissed off with you. “I’m not gonna make this damn speech again, okay? I don’t do this shit. Not since before outbreak day. I - I love you. I don’t want to lose you. I don’t - I can’t lose someone else and I - I haven’t felt this way in so damn long and I tried to ignore it but I love you. I’m in love with you darlin’ and that fuckin’ terrifies me.”

His speech startles you, not expecting to hear something like that. Not from him. You close your eyes and absorb the words that you have wanted to hear for so long, believing them to be nothing more than a wistful dream. “I’m sorry.” You offer. “For that, I guess. For Tess.” You have to look away from his dark gaze, unable to look at him for too long without wanting to kiss him. “I’m not sorry that I love you though.” You murmur, looking into the fire. “It’s- it hurt everyday but it was worth it.”

He turns to look at you, his brown eyes almost orange as they reflect the flames of the fire. He’s slow, giving you a chance to pull away but he leans in, cupping your cheek. His calloused thumb caresses the skin there and he leans in to kiss your lips. It’s soft, the opposite of him, but he wants this moment to be good, to be memorable in case you don’t make it past tomorrow. In this life, every day is a bonus.

Eyes slipping closed, you want to live in this moment. Joel’s lips on yours makes your entire body tingle. Reaching up and taking his hand while your other finds his shoulders. Moaning softly because you can’t believe this is happening and you never expect it to be so gentle.

Joel groans softly into the kiss, grabbing your ass to pull you into his lap. Straddling him and he glances over your shoulder to make sure the kid is still asleep. “Fuck.” Joel groans when you are pressed against him, his lips finding your jaw and he kisses until his lips press against yours again.

You whine again his lips when his hands squeeze your ass just like you’ve imagined more times than you ever want to admit. Wrapping your arms around his neck and shamelessly grinding down on the bulge in his jeans that you had always salivated over. “Joel.” You whisper, not wanting to wake the kid. “I-“ he shushes you, pressing his lips to yours again.

His hands slide under your shirt, wanting to feel more of you, and he groans when you grind down on him again, cock hardening in his jeans. He thinks you’re gorgeous, fucking gorgeous, and he’s jerked off thinking about you too many lonely nights after he stopped sleeping with Tess. “We gotta be quiet.” He orders, sliding his hands higher so he can undo the clasp of your bra. He doesn’t take it off, just pushes it up your chest so he can slide his hands around your torso to cup your tits, squeezing them in his rough hands.

There’s a voice in the back of your mind that wonders if this is because Tess is dead. If you’re merely replacing her for him. You push it down, ignore it. You don’t care when you are getting to touch him like you’ve always wanted to. Ducking your head down and kissing the bare patch on his jaw like you’ve always wanted to. Your fingers fumbling with his belt as you try to get him free from his pants. You can’t ride him like this, not without taking your pants off and that’s dangerous. Hell, this is too dangerous really. You’re distracted by him.

He knows this is dangerous, the girl could wake up, but he desperately wants to feel you. He works on your pants, unbuttoning them and he shoves his hand inside, cupping your cunt after sliding under your panties. He finds you wet but not dripping and his fingers rub your clit after sliding through your folds.

You swear you’re going to bite through your lip trying to keep quiet. Loving the thick fingers you’ve watched so many times slide though your folds and press against your clit. “Joel.” You pant, needing more from him. “I- you have to fuck me.” You gasp out. “Please. Just- just once.” You know that he might change his mind come morning. That he could put that wall back up but you will be happy if you just get one night. “Please, baby. I need you.”

He nods, knowing he needs that connection. Losing Tess, nearly losing you, it’s been a long ass day and he wants to connect to you. He whispers for you to stand up and he withdraws his fingers, making you whine softly. When you stand, he pulls your jeans and panties down to your ankles, dragging you back into his lap so you are straddling him, cunt bare to the cool night air. He reaches down to take his cock out, “can’t cum inside of you. Gonna need you to let me drag you off when I cum.” He whispers, knowing he won’t risk you like that.

You nod quickly, readily agreeing to whatever he wants. “I know- it’s- it’s okay.” You promise, reaching down and wrapping your hand around the thick head of his cock and moaning quietly at the smear of pre-cum building up on the tip so gorgeously. “I-“ instead of telling him that you love him again, you rock your hips forward and line him up so you can sink down on him with a moan of his name that is pressed to his shoulder as you take him.

Fuck, you’re so tight. Hot and wet around him and you mean so much to him. His heart thumps in his chest while his cock twitches when you bottom out. “Fuckkkk.” He hisses through his teeth, hands gripping your ass and he struggles to remain calm as he allows you a moment to adjust around him. “Gotta be quiet.” He whispers in your ear, kissing the skin beneath it.

“You- you might have to cover my mouth.” You admit breathlessly, whispering the words to him as you flash him a quick smile. “Always been loud in bed.” An irony in a world where you’ve had to be silent at so many times when you just wanted to scream. Your fingers sink into his hair and you tug on it slightly as you start to move, wanting to ride him and eager to feel this incredible cock filling you more.

Joel knows he will want more after this. He’s already addicted to you and the thought of ever giving this up, you up, has him on edge. He presses his lips to yours, silencing you with his tongue, and he groans softly when your walls grip him tight when you find the angle that works for you. His hands slide up and down your back, squeezing your ass and enjoying how damn good you feel around him.

You try to stifle your sounds but it’s hard when he feels like he’s in your fucking throat. Stretching you out and making you feel more relaxed than you have in years, while craving more. Your tongue tangles with his while your thighs start to push up and down, moving yourself on his length in a way that keeps you as close as possible. Needing to feel every inch of him as much as you can.

Joel is trying to hang on to his composure, resist the urge to roll you over and just slam into you, fuck you into the ground, but he can’t. The kid is there. He can’t do that now. So he lets you lead, just pulling back to watch you work yourself on his cock. When your mouth opens to moan again, he shoves two fingers in there, wanting you to keep quiet. “Can’t wake the kid, darlin’. You gotta keep quiet.” He reminds you, leaning in to rasp in your ear.

His hands are dirty, filthy. You should want to spit them out but you don’t. Not even caring at this point. The feeling of his cock shredding up into you every time your hips fall is too good to care. His voice rumbling in your ear makes your cunt clench around him, swearing you can cum from him talking.

There’s so much to say to you and yet he can’t. The risk is too much, to both waking up the kid, and to his own heart. He can’t bring himself to say anything but he does lean in to kiss you, replacing his fingers with his lips, and his hand finds your clit. Rubbing tight circles in it as he gets closer to his own orgasm.

You whimper, groaning as he keeps rubbing your clit. Trying to keep quiet but it’s so hard when he feels this good. Your arms tighten around him and you kiss him harshly, feeling your cunt bottom out and your entire body light up with pleasure as you start to cum for him.

“That’s it baby.” Joel practically exhales into your mouth as you clamp down on his cock, body shaking against his. He pulls you closer, thrusting up into you as best he can until he’s pushing you onto the ground beside him, barely managing to shift onto his knees to cum on the dirt and not ruin your clothing. He pants, chest heaving while his cock twitches in his hand. “Jesus Christ.” He exhales, letting go of his cock to tuck himself away and he shuffles over to where you are on the ground. “Sorry baby. Couldn’t - needed to pull out.”

“It’s fine.” You pant, understanding why he needed to pull out, but wishing he hadn’t. “You can’t risk it.” You’ve never told him anyway and in the moment isn’t a good time anyway. It’s not like it matters anyway. You shuffle quietly, trying to pull your clothes back on and put yourself to rights.

Joel watches you put your clothes back on and once you’re settled, he reaches for your hand, dragging you close to wrap his arms around you. He breathes you in, relieved that he didn’t lose you today. He lost Tess, which he will process and grieve in his own way, but right now, he’s just happy to have you. He loves you, he really does. He wishes he had told you sooner but this life is unpredictable at the best of times. You have a journey ahead with him to get to Bill and Frank’s and he will do everything he can to keep you safe. Whatever it takes…he won’t lose anyone else he loves.

****

Joel reluctantly turns over the responsibility of watch to you. He needs rest, you know he didn’t sleep last night and he’s had a fucking hell of a day. You all had, but him most of all. Whatever him and Tess had been towards the end, he had cared for her in his own way and he needed to grieve her. You keep the fire crackling, staring into the flames when you aren’t watching the inky blackness around your small space and listening for more than the rustles of wildlife. Your jerky and your water bottle your own companions through the rest of the night until the first rays of sun peak over the horizon and the sky begins to brighten.

When Joel wakes up, you and Ellie are talking, and he winces at the sunlight, trying to figure out how long he’s been asleep.  “Why didn’t you wake me?” He grunts and you shake your head, “you needed to sleep.” 

Ellie nods, “yeah man. You had a rough day yesterday.” 

He sits up, running his fingers through his hair and he shifts to stand up. “We gotta get going. Get your shit together. I’m gonna take a piss.” He stumbles to the tree line, gun in hand and he checks his surroundings before he shoves the weapon in the back of his jeans and pulls his cock out to pee. When he returns, you’ve put the fire out and are ready to go. Joel grabs his pack and leads the way, rifle in hand.

You walk alongside Ellie for a bit, hanging back as you try to figure out how to tell Joel. You should, he deserves to know. “So, uh, did you work your shit out?” Ellie asks, making you look over at her. “Cause I don’t want it to be a tense trip.” She offers, making you snort. 

“It’s going to be a tense trip regardless.” You remind her, the journey is no walk in the park for sure. “But we’ve talked. While you were asleep.”

Ellie snorts, “talked. Sure.” She doesn’t believe you just talked. She’s not dumb. She learned about all that in school and she knows that’s how most adults show how they feel. You fluster and look at Joel as he strides ahead, rifle gripped in his hand. He sighs and looks over his shoulder at you and Ellie.

You see Joel jerk his head towards you, motioning for you to come up beside him. Eager to get away from Ellie’s prying questions, you hustle forward and catch up to him. “Something up?” You ask, wondering if he wants to talk about the plan for getting Ellie to Bill and Frank’s.

Joel turns to look at you as you come alongside him, “everything okay with the kid?” He asks and you nod, “yeah she’s good.” 

He sighs, “you think she’s gonna be okay with Bill and Frank?” You shrug, “who knows.” Joel glances behind him again to see Ellie looking around and he takes a chance to reach out and hold your hand.

Shocked, you look down at his large hand wrapped around yours, holding it tight and yet he’s not crushing it. Your heart thumps in your chest and it’s impossible to not fall more in love with him. “Joel- I need to tell you something.” You murmur softly, not wanting Ellie to hear.” You can feel him tense up but you squeeze his hand reassuringly. “It’s not- it’s nothing bad. Or, I guess it’s better to say, "I made peace with it a long time ago.” You take a deep breath. “You don’t have to worry about getting me pregnant.” You confess. “I can never have kids.”

Joel frowns, turning to look at you. "You can't - shit. Baby, I'm so sorry." He murmurs, knowing it must've been hard to process. "What - what did they say?" He is curious and wants to know why you can't have kids. He also wants to comfort you but all he can do is squeeze your hand. Even this is more intimacy than he is used to displaying.

“Premature ovarian failure.” You roll your eyes at the words that had been told you so many years ago. “Basically, I stop producing eggs.” You explain. “I found out about two years before the end of the world. So I guess it’s handy?” You try, your joke falling flat. “Not that I would want to have kids in a world like this. It’s not fair to them. Not fair to her.” You nod back towards Ellie. “I just- if we, you know, again….you don’t have to pull out if you don’t want to. If you do, I get it.”

Joel feels guilty that he is happy to hear he doesn't need to pull out but he's sad that you won't get to be a mom. You'd be good at it, even in this fucked up world. "I'm sorry you couldn't, you know, but, next time...I want you in a bed and I ain't gonna pull out." He murmurs so the kid can't hear.

You shiver slightly, happy to hear that there will be a next time if both of you can help it. You hum quietly and shoot him a small smirk. “Maybe we can find a hotel to spend the night in tonight.” You tease softly, not sure what awaits you on this journey but at least you’ll be there. By his side this time, instead of trailing along behind him like his little puppy.

#pedro pascal #joel miller #hbo the last of us spoilers #tlou hbo #hbo tlou #hbo the last of us #the last of us hbo #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller smut #joel miller imagine #joel miller fanfiction

[tiajk]

Amazon strawhat reader

Warnings; fem reader!, everyone crushing on reader if you squint, everyone loves themselves amazon reader, added robin brook franky and jimbei becuase why not even though i haven’t watched that far so if i get something wrong pls tell me, reader can do a lot of stuff

A/N: none!

masterlist. part 2

— luffy would actually love you without a single fucking doubt he was practically jumping up and down asking you to join his crew if you said no he would kidnap you but who could say no to him and his cute face

— luffy uses you as a climbing tool he wants to see something up high and can’t see his going to you asking for uppies and you gladly give them to him

— zoro didn’t want to admit but he liked you on the crew becuase your strong he wants to challenge you and he admires your strength but he’s lowkey scared of you if your taller than him

— let this man see your sword he will literally not want to let it go and he’ll be so honored that you let him even hold it if you let him use it in battle if he lost one of his he’ll be so fucking happy and blushy

— sanji swoons over every women ( and man) but a muscular tall woman that’s race is literally goddess warriors this man is on the floor for you at your every beck and call

— he gets carried by you a lot he tries to carry you but you just carry him and he gets all blushy

— nami thinks that’s your so fucking cool she would 100% want to sun bathe with you all the time

— she also wants to hear about how the stories that your people have made over the years

— ussop is shaking the first time he meets you

— when there’s a fight he hides behind you and says that your under his control when you go along with it makes him very happy that’s why your his favorite

— chopper thinks it’s so cool that your on the crew when you tell him about the animals that your mother told you when you where growing up it makes him feel less like a monster and he does his cute little dance thing

— if you ever in battle and seriously injured and don’t go to him because your stubborn best believe he’s shape shifting and throwing you over his shoulder so you can get treated correctly (you could overpower him but you’ll let him win this one)

— robin has definitely heard of amazons but never seen one before in real life

— you guys will have little reading dates and she loves when you give her books from your home because there so interesting and fascinating

— Franky thinks your SUPERRRR all the time you never understood his obsession with cola but when he had you drink some you were hooked

— he makes you gadgets all the time whether to improve your sword or shield he is always making stuff for you

— when brook saw you he wanted your panties but was kinda scared when you drew your sword at him then he remembered he was dead but it was still kind scary

— jimbei had definitely heard of amazons before but like robin had never seen one

— he’s like a really cool person to be around if you wanna learn about his people culture you would always go to his with no hesitation and he would gladly tell you

— the crew admires you a lot your like there personal bodyguard they love you

— the girls will always make sure that when you guys go shopping you all get matching stuff because why not

— i feel like luffy goes to you for everything he has a cut on his hand he’s going to you instead of chopper it just shows how much he trust you

— when you first join the crew and your kinda timid to the boys they understand because your people say that men are just nasty but they get kind sad because they wanna know you better but over time you learn to love them ask much as you do robin and nami

— tell them stories of your home they wanna hear about it all the time especially if simultaneously they all can’t sleep and want to hear your voice

— they know how stubborn you can be so when you go into battle and almost sacrifice yourself so they can live they can get pretty mad at you but they know it comes from a place of love and respect

— i know that amazon’s have super strength and so does the crew so when you guys them they get kinda scared because of your bone crushing hugs

— if you don’t understand why some people do certain things then they’ll explain it to you

— sanji love it when you tell him about food that you ate when you were a child he tried to recreate it with you helping him

— they know how passionate you can be one time you were telling them how much you love them and made them cry

— whenever zoro gets lost you always find him first or he finds you first becuase he can feel your passion 100 miles away

— luffy definitely flexes on law and kid that he has an amazing warrior on his crew and they don’t (they admire you just as much and are kind jealous)

— if someone were to ever catcall you or harass you before you can get a word at there all jumping the person making there life absolutely fucking miserable

— for your birthday they did the cutest thing they had the sunny decorated like your home island from what they could make out of the books and just made you fell right at home

— when they find out your a princess that doesn’t change a thing about they see you but they can tell that another place you get your passion from

— nami will probably ask you for some money and you give it to her becuase you love her so much and she never charges you because of it

— you love you nakamas and they love you

#ronoroa zoro x reader #strawhat crew x reader #monkey d luffy x reader #luffy x reader #zoro x reader #tiajk #opla sanji x reader #vinsmoke sanji x reader #opla nami x reader #opla luffy x reader #opla zoro x reader #opla ussop x reader #nico robin x reader #franky x reader #opla x reader #one piece x reader #chopper x reader #brook x reader #jimbei x reader #one piece x reader #one piece #one piece fluff #strawhats x reader platonic

[igotanidea]

For his eyes only: Jason Todd x fem!reader x Dick Grayson preview

MINORS DNI!!!!!!! I'M SERIOUS!!!! IT'S HEAVY MATURE CONTENT AND I SWEAR IF YOU ARE UNDER LEGAL AGE AND INTERACT WITH THAT I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN!

Seriously, I got so much fluff and angst on my blog, go check out sth else.

AS FOR THE REST: Let me know if you want more of this, cause damn my mind right now..... 🥵🥵🥵🥵

***

„Jay…..” she called him, swaying her hips left and right in that seductive way that always got her his undivided attention. Jason was currently splayed on the sofa, reading a book, but the second he saw her coming from the other side of the room he tossed it away, smirking knowingly.

“what is it princess?”  he propped himself on the elbow, eyes fixed solely on her figure, her leggings leaving very little to the imagination “got something for me?”

“Mhm…..” she muttered, straddling his hips, hands locking on his neck, while his own found a way to her waist, gripping her tightly “I got a …. Proposition.”

“I like how that sounds. Keep talking baby…..”

“I’ve been thinking about …. Well, spicing things up in the bedroom.”

“Now I most definitely like how that sounds. Shall we start now?” his right hand travelled down, an started  palming her ass.

“Why can’t you just let me finish, Jaybrid?” she grinded on him a bit, which got her a groan “’At least one of us should be able to keep it in the pants, don’t you think?” Y/N whispered into his ear, moving a bit more.

“I….. what do you need?” he hissed though clenched teeth, fighting the urge to just throw her on her back and have his way with her

“I want a threesome….” She whispered and  fuck, he was hard before but now…. now he started burning up. Who would have thought that his little girl would suggest something like this? And to think that when they started dating she was all vanilla, scared of anything to crazy. Apparently, his lust, sex drive and explorer vain finally rubbed off on her. He created a monster and he loved that.

“God, can you say that again?” he panted, breath fastened. “that’s so hot coming from your mouth”

“Let’s explore something new, Jace….”

“Fuck, yes, you already got me.” He sat up looking straight into her eyes. “so…. you, me and Roy?”

“I was rather thinking about someone else….” She tangled fingers in his hair, massaging his scalp and tugging on the roots in that way he liked so much “someone, in your own playground.”

“What?” he frowned, but then the realization dawned on him “NO!”

“Jace….”

“I said no. fuck no. I am not sharing you with my fucking older brother.’

“But sharing me with Roy was completely fine.”

“those are two different things!”

“How so?”

“Dick is …. Is ….”

“What, baby?” she cooed “are you scared of a little competition? Cause Jay, believe me, I’m just curious about what it would be like to have both Nightwing and Red Hood. Wonder which one of you is a boss in the bed…..” she tapped her chin and he used that moment to trap her underneath him.

“I’m not scared of him! And you should know that the only one who can contain your slutty attitude is me” he kissed her hungrily, her back arching into him, before she realized the game Jay was playing and pushed him off

“Does this mean you agree?” she smiled absolutely innocently ”Please, baby. I’ll wear that little red lacy thing you like so much….”

“So he can admire you in that?” he hissed

“No baby, of course not.” her eyes sparkled dangerously, filled with lust and mischief “so you can take it off me before his very eyes. To leave Dick desperate, whiny, jealous….”

“Fuck…” Jason felt himself getting harder at the mere thought of killing two birds with one stone. Having her and torturing Grayson? He truly did not deserve the angel Y/N was being. “Just tell me when and where and it better be quick, cause otherwise babe, I’m gonna take you right here, right now. “

#jason todd fanfiction #jason todd imagine #jason todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd x fem!reader #jason todd x oc #jason todd x you #jason todd x y/n #red hood fanfiction #red hood imagine #red hood x reader #red hood x fem!reader #red hood #red hood x y/n #jason todd smut #nightwing x reader #dick grayson x reader #dick grayson smut #nightwing smut

[sundrop-writes]

My Heart Is The Worst Kind Of Weapon

Ellie Williams x Fem!Reader

The joke's on you - we are salt and you are the wound.

Summary:

Ellie confronts your abuser, and after years of torment, you finally feel free.

Ellie Williams x Fem!Reader. Strangers to Lovers. Hurt and Comfort. Can be read with or without considering the canon events.

Word Count: 9,600

The Last of Us Masterlist | AO3 Link

THIS IS A RE-POST. This is a fic from my old blog (a blog that was shadowbanned, forcing me to move). This fic is not stolen, it is completely mine, and I am just re-posting it to help people find my new blog, and to make my masterlist complete when I post new fics for this fandom.

Detailed warnings and author’s notes below the cut.

Warnings: reader uses she/her pronounces, the reader is a lesbian/does not date men, themes of abuse and abusive relationships, domestic abuse, ‘love at first sight’ trope, could be considered ‘soulmates’ trope, hurt and comfort, the reader is being abused by a family member and is saved by Ellie,the reader is being emotionally and physically abused by a family member, evidence of emotional manipulation/brainwashing in the reader character, the reader character has injuries from physical abuse, trauma, becoming free from abuse, depictions of violence (fist fighting between Ellie and the abuser), mentions of guns and gun violence, there is elements of Joel and Ellie’s relationship in the background and this could be read with or without considering the canon events (their emotional falling out), mentions of alcohol, drugging someone against their will (done toward the abuser), threatening someone’s genitals with a knife (done toward the abuser), kidnapping and intimidation through violent threats (done toward the abuser), mentions of hanging/choking/suffocation, use of lesphobic slurs (I think ‘rug muncher’ is the only one?) (from the abuser towards Ellie), Joel and Ellie making a kidnapping (and potentially murder) plot together, this has a happy/hopeful ending. 

A/N: Another re-post of a fic I really, really love. This one is particularly deeply personal to me. Whenever I write about the concept of abuse, it’s very emotional for me, but this one has some more personal touches - because it is about abuse coming from a family member and how it can be difficult to part from that because you rely on them for survival and resources that keep you alive. Often times when people think about abuse - or when abusive relationships are modelled in media, it is a romantic relationship, and they display how a person can go from sweet and romantic and turn into a monster, and how it manipulates the victims emotions and makes it difficult for them to leave. And I do think that is an important story to tell, but one equally important - the story of an abuser who is a constant in your life, and makes you dependent on them for survival, and it causes you to rationalise all of their poor actions and behaviour because you need them. You want them to be a good person in your mind because you don’t know how to sustain your life without them.

Another deeply personal touch on this fic - the title. It is titled after a Fall Out Boy song, and you guys might know - I fucking love Fall Out Boy. I feel like all of their songs have a direct cord to my soul. But this one in particular is so special and tender for me. I was struggling with what to title this fic, and I was going through a playlist of songs that I listen to frequently - and this one came up. Although I believe the original intent of this song is about a cheating spouse, for me, it brings up feelings of how I think of my abuser. Especially the lines ‘I’m the kind of kid that can’t let anything go, and you wouldn’t know a good thing if it came up and split your throat’ and 'this is me wishing you in to the worst situations’.

I feel like it is very accurate, because Ellie is someone who is very 'wearing her heart on her sleeve’ and through this fic, she wants to be emotionally detached and leave the situation alone, but she can’t. And it turns her heart into this weapon against her, and ultimately, against the abuser. Because it is only of the fact that she cares so much about y/n that she wants to hurt the guy at all. And it also works to describe y/n’s feelings, because she hates that she has emotional attachment to her abuser, but she does, and it makes her feel as though her heart is a weapon against herself. So yeah. I hope you enjoy this fic, and if you relate to it somehow, I hope you can heal.

...

Ellie didn’t believe in love at first sight. 

She was the type of person who thought it was cheesy - some made-up bullshit built for movies and books to sell people on the type of story that would never actually happen. She founded herself on facts, and though she knew realistically it would never happen in her lifetime, she thought that space travel was far more factual than something like love at first sight. 

Until she met you. 

And yeah, it probably wasn’t love - at least not true love - until later on. But there had to be some reason that she stuck her neck out for you like that. There had to be something drawing her to you like that. Maybe it was that fabled invisible string. That unspoken thing that made her want to die and want to kill for you, especially within the first ten minutes of meeting you. 

You were with a group taking refuge in Jackson. In such a small town, rumors were rampant. The group had been in town for less than a day and people were already whispering about whether or not Maria was going to take in such a large number of people on such short notice. 

Personally, Ellie didn’t care. She knew that Jackson had the resources to support new people and she knew that Maria would make the right decision. She was a good leader; she would sense if the group were good enough people to stay or not. She wouldn’t knowingly let in any dangers. 

But then, Ellie started to care very suddenly, very much - when she met you. 

When she saw you, the very first thing she noticed was your smile. She didn’t think she had ever seen someone smile with such intense, genuine joy. It was something that instantly twisted her gut into knots - filled her with those cartoonish butterflies as she took in the sight of you. 

You were standing along the edge of one of the fences, near a small, green pasture for the animals in town. It was a small wooden fence that came up to your hips, around an area that was sectioned off to keep the baby cows in so they could graze. You were leaning on the wooden panels, admiring those little cows with awe, a smile on your face a mile wide as you watched the animals stumble around happily in the field. It was a beautiful spring day, with a light breeze kissing against your skin, and plenty of bright green grass for the cows to snack on. It made the sun seem so much brighter with your smile under it.

Ellie couldn’t help but find herself drawn to you. 

She was supposed to be on her way to return her rifle to the gun shed after patrol. But instead, her feet carried her to you, almost entirely against her will. And soon she found herself standing barely a foot away from you, leaning on that same fence with one hand and staring at you with a big idiotic smile of her own. 

You gave a small jolt when you finally took your eyes off the cows and noticed her staring. Ellie panged with guilt. She hadn’t realized how unintentionally creepy she was being. She didn’t know that it was a programmed response on your part - an ingrained jumpiness that you couldn’t help. 

She swallowed around the dryness in her throat, struggling for words, and she was thankful when you spoke first. 

“You guys have everything here.” You said, bright and excited as you put your eyes back on the grazing pasture. “It’s the first time I’ve seen baby cows before.” 

“We - uh - we also have sheep.” Ellie tripped over herself to say this, shouldering the strap of her rifle to point beyond to a spot where the sheep’s pasture could not be seen. “And there’s greenhouses, and horses. My horse is named Shimmer. You can come and meet her if you want!” 

Ellie almost felt stupid, rushing to say all of this, rushing to impress you. If you liked Jackon’s plentiful resources, then perhaps if she pressed just how fantastic and resource filled the place was, you would want to stay. 

She found herself wanting you to stay. Very badly. 

You bit your lip, slightly shy, and let out a nervous giggle. You didn’t want to turn her down. But years of warnings in a closed off echo chamber had made you weary of strangers. Even seemingly kind ones. 

“That would be nice.” You told her quietly. “Maybe later.” 

Ellie thought she was coming on too strong. She kicked herself internally because of it. 

She had no idea that you were hesitant to be friendly - hesitant to get too close because of the ‘consequences’ you had seen in the past. In your eyes, Ellie seemed like a lovely, friendly person, but you didn’t want to get hurt for trying to make friends. Even if you felt a spark of attraction towards her, you could never pursue it. You didn’t have the room to do so. 

Ellie simply nodded at you, the pain of rejection curling in her gut as she began to walk off. But she stopped dead in her tracks when she heard it. 

Yelling - a brute voice disrupting your peace. 

When Ellie turned around, there was a man. Someone who would have been otherwise average in his looks, if not for the violence he wore so boldly, obviously uncaring of who saw him. His face was tight with anger as he crowded into your personal space, grabbing a hold of your wrist and screaming at you relentlessly as though you had greatly offended him. 

She wondered how someone like you - someone so sweet, who took wonder in baby cows, could ever do something to warrant such a visceral reaction of anger from someone. 

Ellie gripped her rifle tightly. 

A voice in her mind told her that it was none of her business, but another quickly argued back and said that you didn’t deserve to be treated like this. It said that she should step in. She felt frozen as the two sides warred inside her. For a few moments, she simply watched on, taking in the one-sided conflict between you and this man with horror swimming inside of her. 

Your reaction was the worst part. 

Your face immediately shifted from that excitement, awe, and wonder that the baby cows gave you and contorted into pure pain. Tears welled up in your eyes and pure fear overtook your entire body. Your spine coiled up, as if to protect your internal organs, but you made no real moves to get away from this man. 

He spouted at you about ‘wandering off’ and ‘what have I told you before’, ranting on and on as if you had made some horrible mistake by taking time out of your day to admire a grazing pasture full of animals. Ellie was just about to unlock her knees and charge over there to do something about it when a vial, angry eye caught hers over your shoulder. 

“The fuck you lookin’ at?” He barked at Ellie. 

Those simple words were all it took to trigger something in Ellie. 

At a moment’s notice, all of her logic flew out the window, and she found herself consumed by the impulse of her rage instead. She shed off the strap of her rifle, leaving the heavy object on the ground behind her in case it might impede her as she barreled toward the man like a raging bull. 

“Why don’t you tell me, asshole?!” Ellie fired back, entirely nonsensical. 

But both of them, ill-tempered, were beyond talking at that point. 

He stepped around you and went to open his mouth again and Ellie took a swing. She easily made contact with his jaw, but he absorbed it well. Her knuckles stung as she pulled back and landed another hit on his cheek, most definitely leaving a nasty bruise. 

Ellie was caught off guard when a large fist collided with her face. 

She would never be the type to say that men shouldn’t hit women simply on principle. Especially not in this case, because she had swung first. 

She was shocked simply because of the sheer force behind the hit. It wasn’t just to get her off of him - it was vengeful. 

Though her skull was rattled, when he moved his hand up again, Ellie caught his wrist and hit him again. Still feeling that blinding rage, she took him to the ground. His nose felt like mush under her knuckles and she wouldn’t have stopped - if not for someone forcefully pulling her off of him. 

She wanted to yell when she found out that someone was Tommy. But he quickly dampened any of her protests. 

Tommy then gave her a long lecture about ‘first impressions’ and handling her temper during ‘misunderstandings’. He told her that being a part of their family meant that even unintentionally, she represented Jackson as a whole. Regrettably, Ellie felt guilt curling in her stomach because of his words. Even if the guy had it coming, she hated Joel or Tommy looking down on her with disappointment. 

And some time during that long, droning speech, you and that man slipped away. Ellie had a very bad feeling in her gut because of it. 

She had a feeling that he was nothing but a cause of pain for you. 

But of course, she had no outright proof of that. Aside from your tears. But you weren’t even there to tell Tommy your story. And what story was that? That you had been yelled at? How the hell did that substantiate Ellie beating a man up? 

She had nothing more to go on than a gut feeling. 

So rather than telling Tommy about any of the things she suspected, she accepted everything she had said, she apologized for losing her cool, and then (after he gave her a hug, patted her on the head and said ‘it’s okay, kiddo’) - she turned and walked away. 

When she returned her rifle to the gunshed, Jesse asked if something had happened on patrol to cause the bruises on her face and make her expression so sickly, and she quickly shrugged him off. 

Ellie felt intensely guilty for not doing something more. She felt bad for not simply asking you what was wrong, for not handling the situation like a real human being. She had no clue why she couldn’t simply be calm when she saw you so upset like that. 

She didn’t even really know you. She just had a feeling that you were too good to be treated like that. Something deep in her gut was screaming that you did nothing to deserve it. 

The group you came in with split up. Some of them made their way down to the coast with the intention of fishing, perhaps finding and fixing up an old boat, and some of them stayed. 

Ellie took notice when you and the man who had yelled at you stayed. 

She also took notice of the fact that whenever she saw you around town, that man was never very far from you. And whenever he lingered around you, you were much different from the girl she had met that day near the pasture. You were slumped down, never rising to your full posture, constantly tense, and incredibly quiet. You never spoke a single word to anyone other than that awful man. You never even made eye contact with other people. 

Ellie spent weeks watching you from afar, attempting to see if you were okay, looking for some ‘evidence’ that you weren’t. Some hard proof that she could bring to Tommy and Maria, something to show that she wasn’t insane for attacking that man. And it wasn’t until the spring rolled into summer, and Ellie’s bruises from the incident had faded, that she found time to speak to you again. 

There was a time when Ellie caught you without your ugly shadow - when you were by the coops, feeding the chickens, imitating their clucking and laughing to yourself. 

“I think you’ve got a career as a chicken caller.” Ellie chuckled as she walked toward you. 

You smiled when you looked up and saw her. 

“Maybe.” You shrugged. “I just like them because if they say mean things to me, I don’t have to know.” 

Ellie felt a lump rise up in her throat at the pain behind your words. 

It left an awkward, painful silence for a moment before you spoke up again. 

“Look, I’m sorry about before.” You told her. “If you thought you had to defend me, or…” You continued staring at the grainy feed on the ground, pointedly not looking at Ellie. “I piss him off. Often. He was just having a bad day, and I-” 

“That’s no excuse for him to yell at you like that.” Ellie cut you off. She rushed to get the words out, desperate for you to know this at the truth. “He’s got a temper, doesn’t he?” 

“So do you.” You chuckled. It wasn’t genuine laughter. 

There was a twinge of fear in your voice. It made her nauseous. She never wanted you to fear her the same way that you clearly feared that horrible man. 

“I’m sorry.” Ellie said quietly, intense guilt overtaking her. “I do genuinely apologize if I scared you. I just… I couldn’t stand to see you crying like that.” 

“I totally get it.” You snorted, painful humor lingering in your voice. “It’s so annoying. But… sometimes I can’t help it.” Though you kept your voice steady, these simple words spoke volumes of pain. 

Ellie wanted to ask why. She wanted to ask if there were more days when he pushed you to tears. 

“I’m sorry that I’m such a crybaby.” You told her. You tried to laugh this off, as though it was just a funny trait of your personality, and not a fault of pain being inflicted onto you. 

Ellie shook her head vigorously. 

“No.” She quickly corrected you. “That’s not what I meant.” 

Confusion knitted over your features. Ellie fought hard to find the words to explain it. 

“I was angry because he made you cry.” She explained. “I was pissed off because he upset you, and - and, I know it’s stupid. I don’t even know you. But you don’t deserve that.” 

Hearing those words for the first time was a truth so radical it almost tore the ground from underneath your feet. After years of being told that you weren’t worth the trouble - that the food you consumed was a burden, that the bullets used to protect you were a waste - being told for the first time that you didn’t deserve such treatment… you felt like the words didn’t belong in your ears. 

“What?” You looked at her with pure shock overtaking your expression, a most genuine and raw reaction. “You really care that much about me being upset?” 

This gripped Ellie’s insides worse than anything else. You could barely conceptualize someone caring about your feelings this genuinely. 

“Yeah.” She admitted quietly. “I do care.” 

This left your face tight with contemplation, intense thought. Ellie didn’t want to leave room for you to get too caught up in it, for you to overanalyze her genuine gesture. So she came up with something else. 

“So… did you still wanna meet my horse? Maybe we could take her out for a ride?” Ellie posed. 

You seemed hesitant. But eventually, you decided ‘fuck it’ - you might as well have some fun. Especially if it meant spending some time with someone who actually seemed to care about you. 

Ellie took you to the stables and introduced you to Shimmer, and officially introduced you to herself, as you did in return - which seemed odd after all that had happened. But it was nice to finally have a name to go with your pretty face. It was nice to finally hear your laughter as Ellie made an age old joke about hay and horses. 

After you took a while to pet the horse and get acquainted with her, Ellie got permission to go past the gate. She took you on a slow trot on the outskirts of Jackson. She had butterflies curling in her stomach the whole time as you gripped her waist, sitting on the back of the horse, and you smiled brightly and complemented how peaceful everything was. 

When the two of you got back from the ride, you kissed Ellie on the cheek, and she nearly squealed with happiness. 

And then, she didn’t see you for nearly a week afterwards. 

She thought she had done something wrong, but she had a sneaking suspicion that it had nothing to do with her and everything to do with that awful man who barely let you out of his sight. 

The next time she did see you, you were walking along closely behind that wicked man, your eyes low to the ground. And when she called out your name, you didn’t look up to greet her. 

The sweet summer turned into fall and Ellie felt the guilt gnawing at her more, especially when she noticed the days or even weeks when you didn’t seem to come outside. Days when you didn’t show up to do your chores and were supposedly sick, days when nobody else seemed to care why you were missing. 

There was that voice in her head. ‘She’s just a girl.’ The voice said. ‘It’s just a crush. It’s none of your business. You should just move on.’ 

Ellie couldn’t bring herself to listen to that voice. For some reason, she felt this thing gnawing deep in her gut - something that said you needed her. 

Against her better judgment, Ellie went to the house she knew you were staying at, and knocked on the door. 

She wasn’t surprised when you answered. You peeked through the door with only half your face showing, utterly terrified. 

“What are you doing here?” You barked.

Ellie had a feeling that your anger was a formation of fear, and it wasn’t entirely directed at her. 

“I was worried about you.” Ellie admitted shyly. 

You opened the door further, hesitantly, and then pulled Ellie inside before you shut the door and closed all the locks. Ellie felt her stomach twist when she noticed you looking through the curtains, as though you were afraid for your life, looking out for danger. 

Ellie had a distinct feeling that she knew what that danger was. 

A giant lump formed in Ellie’s throat when you turned around and she saw it - that black eye, swollen and bruised, glaring at her. It was the part of your face you had been blocking with the other half of the door. There were other things she couldn’t see. Scrapes and bruises and hand shapes swats over your arms and torso, covered by your purposefully baggy sweatshirt with long sleeves. 

“Just stop.” You said, turning to Ellie, your voice quaking with the intensity of your emotions. “Stop worrying about me.” 

Ellie’s jaw tensed. She would find that intensely difficult - practically impossible. 

“No.” She easily told you so. “I care about y-” 

“Stop.” You said, a harsh cry in your throat. 

It was too painful for you to consider. The idea that someone sweeter and nicer existed in the world and cared for you. The idea that the way of life you had known for years wasn’t the only way to survive. 

“Look, I like you.” You added on. “You’re really sweet. But you don’t want me. I’m sure you can find someone else-” 

Ellie stepped forward, her fingers brushing so gently over your cheek, right underneath the swelling of that awful black eye. You were so entirely startled by the pure gentleness of the touch that you let out a choked off sound from the back of your throat, almost a sob. 

“He did this to you?” Ellie asked, her voice deadly calm and quiet. 

You refused to answer. 

“Is he your fucking boyfriend?” She prodded, her voice even sharper and more offended now. 

You scoffed, pulling away from her touch. You thought she was jealous of the idea of you having a romantic partner. But in fact, she was deeply offended at the universe, she was in turmoil at the idea that someone would even consider hurting you when they claimed to love you. 

“My brother.” You told her, the word almost sounding like poison on your tongue. “I would never choose someone like him. But I’ve been stuck with him for as long as I can remember.” 

“Oh.” Ellie said quietly. 

It was not a possibility she had considered. But she knew that there had never been any romantic connotations to the interactions between the two of you. Only danger, intimidation, and pain. 

It was almost a worse fate, in a sense. The idea that you had been saddled with him because of genetics, that you couldn’t escape him because of obligation, or being forced to survive together.  

“Yeah, oh.” You repeated, tears clutching the inside of your throat. “And really, it’s none of your business. He’s always taken care of me. He takes care of me, so-” 

“This is not taking care of you.” Ellie argued sharply, gesturing to the mark on your face. “If you need someone to take care of you, I’m right here.” 

You rolled your eyes at this. Again, you thought it was jealousy. That it was her trying to make herself seem appealing as a romantic partner. 

You didn’t know that she was serious, that she would give you the world on a silver platter if given the chance. 

“And I sure as hell won’t hit you.” Ellie added on. 

“That’s easy for you to say.” You scoffed. 

“That’s easy for me to do.” She fired back. “Not beating the people you love is the bare fucking minimum. In case no one ever told you that.” 

Her last words were intensely sharp, but struck a chord deep inside of you. It caused your stomach to churn with harsh realization, something you probably already knew that was brought to the surface and waved in your face:

This was not a life that everyone lived. 

“I can’t do this right now.” You huffed quietly, shaking your head. 

You were still swimming deep in denial, hating the idea that your life was founded entirely on pain. But Ellie would fight through all of that pain to get to you. 

“Come on, how long is it gonna be before he kills you?” She asked, the words quiet but devastatingly striking. 

You remained painfully silent. 

“What kind of life is this for you?” She spoke up when you did not reply. “There’s so much more out there for you that doesn’t involve your asshole brother.” 

“Look, you know nothing about him.” You said sharply. “You don’t know what kind of life he’s had. You don’t know what he’s been through. What we’ve been through. Some of the things he’s saved me from.” 

Ellie could only imagine what was going through your mind. Obviously, she had seen some of the darker things the world was capable of. She knew that if your brother had saved you from some of those horrors, it made him look like a saint by comparison. 

She wanted to scream that you didn’t have to go through this. Life didn’t have to be like this. Absorbing his hits and being a target for his anger wasn’t necessary for your survival. 

“Usually it’s my fault anyway.” You sighed. “I meant what I said before. I have some weird talent for pissing him off.” 

Ellie was downright insulted at this. 

“It is not your fault.” She rushed to say, her throat straining with the intense passion behind the words. 

You found it difficult to believe her. 

Any reply you could have mustered was drowned out by the sound of heavy boots coming up the porch. 

“Get out.” You barked at Ellie, panicked. “Get out, you have to leave.” 

You shoved Ellie out the back door before she could argue, and the sound of more screaming and an ugly collision of a hand on flesh made Ellie clench her fists to avoid charging back inside. She had to tell herself one simple thing - she wouldn’t be able to explain a murder to Maria or Tommy. 

She wouldn’t have to. 

And there was maybe only one other person in town who would understand. 

She went right from your place to Joel’s, and he seemed too pleased about her being there in order for him to really question it. He seemed even more pleased when she asked for his help. 

When Ellie explained the situation, she was surprised that Joel didn’t want to take it to Maria. But they both knew that she was diplomatic. She had an entire town to think of. She couldn’t be chasing down people’s personal problems, and she couldn’t be known for doling out vigilante justice. She had to make people in Jackson feel safe, and she didn’t think that civilian trials and public executions would be the way to do that. And as far as Ellie knew, nobody in Jackson had ever acted up like this before. Maybe they were just good at keeping it a secret. (That thought scared her more than anything.) 

Joel suggested something about a quiet smothering and a shovel. Nobody would ever find the guy’s body, he reasoned. 

Ellie didn’t want it that way. Even if the guy was a piece of shit, he was your only family. She knew that in some fucked up way, you would miss him. 

No - it needed to be his choice. And he wasn’t going to make the right choice on his own. So they had to guide him to it. Well, they had to force him to it and shove his face in the damn right choice. 

And then, if he didn’t make the right choice - then they would go to Joel’s version, a Plan B, and they would get the shovel. 

Her and Joel talked it over for hours, making a solid Plan A. When they were both finally satisfied, Ellie left out the back door to head to her place to finally crash for the night - when had it gotten dark out? 

She paused in her tracks when she saw you standing at the bottom of the few stairs that led up to the porch. 

You had a large sweatshirt hood pulled up over your head, and in the minimal light from the back door’s bulb, Ellie could see that your eyes were entirely startled. Your cheek was sporting a fresh, wicked bruise that hadn’t been there before. Your lip was busted, and you had the neck of the sweater pulled up, half hiding some marks on your neck. 

Clearly your brother had come home furious about something. Perhaps he had seen Ellie leaving. She partially felt guilty about it, and definitely felt more secure in her plan. 

“I - uh - I ran into Dina, and she said I could find you here.” You said, motioning off to where you must have spoken to Dina, muttering nervously because Ellie had been standing there for a few moments staring you down with sadness in her eyes and had not spoken. “I was gonna knock. But… I…” 

‘I got nervous.’ The words were lost on your tongue. You knew it sounded strange. Being afraid to knock. Being afraid to ask for help. 

Ellie walked down the steps to meet you on the ground, and you didn’t move away when she reached up and brushed a gentle thumb across your lip - not quite touching the area when it had been split open, but clearly scorning it in her mind. 

She wanted to suggest something about running away, but she knew Joel would just come after her. The easier solution would simply be to get rid of the awful man who had done this to you. 

You grabbed her wrist and leaned into her hand. She cupped your cheek then, holding you so tenderly that it almost hurt. Your body was so unfamiliar with sweetness, with comfort. 

“I can’t do this.” You sobbed quietly. “Ellie, I can’t do this.” 

You weren’t feeling brave enough to leave the familiar, the thing that bound you in pain and torment. 

“Yes, you can.” Ellie told you firmly. 

She gently tilted your head up, forcing your gaze toward hers. 

“Ask me.” She told you. 

You both knew what it meant. 

‘Ask me for my help.’ 

‘Ask me to get rid of that monster, and I will.’ 

You let it bubble inside of you. The words swelled up inside of your throat, and a wicked sob escaped, causing hot tears to leak down and touch Ellie’s hand before you got it out. 

“Help me.” You croaked. “Please.” 

“I will.” Ellie told you firmly. “I’ll get rid of him.” 

She leaned in then and planted a kiss on your forehead, something sweet enough to render another sob from your throat. When she moved to pull away, you reached around and grabbed the back of her shirt, clutching on tight to keep her there, pulling her into a hug and holding her to savor the precious temporary moment you were able to be away from your tormentor. 

“Ellie?” You said her name, and she hummed a response, still leaning with her lips gently pressed against your forehead. “I know - I know it’s so stupid. But… I don’t want him dead.” You told her. Ellie had predicted as much. “I just… I want him gone.” 

“It’s not stupid.” Ellie assured you. “I understand.” 

By the time Ellie got everything together, the cold was just setting in. 

The first snowfall had just hit Jackson, and she had made sure to keep a close eye on you in the interim. You told her over and over again that you were going to be fine. 

A few times you even went back on your ask, you told her that you and your brother were getting along much better. Ellie’s gut churned on the days when you smiled and told her that things between you and your brother were getting much better, that he was making an effort to control his temper, that you could see him making ‘big changes’. 

On for another fresh wound to show up on you and when she would ask you about it, you broke down crying and declared that it was all your stupid fault. 

Ellie knew that he was never going to change. And it only made her more firm in her convictions to carry through with the plan that she and Joel had carefully laid out. 

Gathering the supplies needed for her plan wasn’t as hard as she originally thought. 

The pharmacy in Jackson was surprisingly easy to steal from. She found a pharmaceutical journal in the library; finding out which drugs could knock out a grown man and memorizing the names of them - not that hard. 

And then Ellie took an easy fall during one of her patrols, wincing and whining about the pain in her twisted wrist far more than she felt it, getting the nurse to unlock the drug cabinet to give her some tylenol with codeine. Then she ‘accidentally’ knocked over a tray with a bunch of stray pieces on it, and she got what she needed out of the unlocked cupboard like clockwork. 

She wasn’t sure if the people in Jackson were naive, or if she was far too used to being a criminal. 

Her wrist had healed up nicely by the time everything else was ready.  

Joel thought it would be wisest that they use his basement. 

He explained to Ellie that they could use an old military technique - shut out all the light, take away anything potentially familiar about the room, make it naked and bare and anonymous so that it would seem like a random place that could be anywhere. 

It would be right in town, but the prospect of seeming so far off, so ‘in the middle of nowhere’ - it would be a good part of the scare tactic. They spent some time cleaning out the basement, putting garbage bags over the windows, and draping the room in plastic tarping - partially to scare him, and partially, just in case. 

Joel got a bottle of cheap whiskey that he watered down some, and Ellie poured out the bottle of pills onto the counter with the intention to crush them all up and mix them with the alcohol. 

“Christ Ellie, that’s enough to take down a goddamn horse.” Joel commented. 

Clearly, it was too many pills. 

Ellie took a handful of them - half, and put them back in the original bottle. When she looked up at Joel again, he shook his head. Still too many? 

“Here, let me.” He said, gently shouldering her out of the way so he could make the mixture himself. 

“You act like you’ve done this before.” She commented. 

“You act surprised that I’ve done this before.” He replied. 

He did have a point. Especially considering that when Joel had met Ellie, he had likely been expecting her to be a large bag of drugs, and not a child who needed to be smuggled. 

Joel put back a much bigger portion of the pills, only leaving four tablets that he began to crush up to be mixed in with the drink. 

“The alcohol is gonna magnify the effects of this stuff. A lot.” Joel explained, emphasizing the last words. “You kept saying you didn’t wanna kill him. So you don’t need to give him an overdose.” 

Ellie nodded. It was a good point. She felt lucky to have his help with this. 

Joel scraped the crushed up tablets - now a powder - into the bottle, and put his thumb over the opening to seal it while he shook it up, making sure it was well dissolved before he put the cap back on. 

“Remember. Pour one for yourself, but don’t fucking drink from it.” Joel reminded her. 

It was a mental tactic. Pour two glasses, so as to not seem suspicious, but don’t take a sip. 

Joel handed her the bottle, and they walked over to your place. 

Ellie made sure that Dina was keeping you busy with spare chores, things she supposedly couldn’t do without your help, ensuring that you would be out of the house for the night and wouldn’t miss your brother gone. Ellie went around to the front door and Joel went to the back, waiting for her signal. 

She knocked on the front door and when your brother answered, she waved the bottle. She apologized for the two of them having gotten off ‘on the wrong foot’ when he first came into town. She claimed that she wanted to set things right with him. 

He looked her up and down with suspicion, but opened the door. He fetched a couple of glasses and Ellie did as Joel instructed - poured one for herself after she poured one for him, took it in her hand, but didn’t sip from it. 

He eagerly knocked the first drink back and Ellie hated the fact that he didn’t pass out right away. He poured himself a second and she forced herself to make an attempt at conversation. 

She asked about one of the pictures he had on the mantle over the fireplace - a framed photo of him and some woman. He grunted, saying that it was ‘his bitch’ but ‘she was dead now’. The way he spoke about women made Ellie want to hurl. This caused the conversation to lull into him asking if Ellie had a boyfriend. 

She shrugged it off. Especially seeing as he didn’t seem like the most accepting type if she told him why she didn’t have one. Then he looked her up and down as though he was inspecting her. As though just because she didn’t have a man in her life, that made her an available prospect for him. Ellie clutched her glass so hard she thought it cracked. 

He took more gulps of his drink, and then he mentioned you. He said that he had seen Ellie talking to you. 

He wasn’t clever about his intentions. He wanted to know why someone who was clearly friendly toward his sister wanted to be on his good side all of a sudden. 

Before she could make up some lie, the drugs kicked in. He became hazy, and made a slurred thought about his liquor tolerance being higher normally before he dropped to the floor, out cold. 

Ellie knocked on the back door for Joel, and they had his unconscious body halfway down the basement stairs when Tommy’s voice came into the house, shouting for Joel. They both gave each other that ‘oh shit’ look and Joel dropped the man’s head like a sack of potatoes. He rushed up the stairs to talk to Tommy before his brother could come to them. 

Ellie dragged the dead weight the rest of the way, and she listened as the voices carried through the house. Joel was getting called out for an emergency patrol route - a large horde of Infected had been spotted near the west watch tower. 

Tommy asked for Ellie too, but Joel lied and said that he hadn’t seen her. 

As Joel was gathering his things to leave, he went to the top of the basement stairs. He gave Ellie one last firm, knowing look. It was an out. She knew that if she wanted to, he would stay back and help her clean up the mess, and they would find some other way to go about things so she wouldn’t have to go it alone. 

But she was firm in her convictions. 

“I’ve got this.” She told him, giving him a nod. 

He nodded back and then closed the basement door. 

She picked a steady beam in the ceiling. 

She dangled off it with her body weight to make sure it wouldn’t budge (even though your asshole brother was probably a good hundred pounds heavier than her). And then she put him in the noose Joel had tied, with the rope tied precariously around the beam. 

She had more than enough slack on it to make sure that he wouldn’t choke while still unconscious from the drugs. As tempting as it was to simply kill the man who had been abusing you for years, this was about scaring him. This was a warning. An attempt to get him to make the right choice. His hands were tied behind his back, making him unable to get away. 

As he came around to consciousness, he began to groan and squirm, and Ellie wasted no time in putting her plan into action. 

She went to where she had the other end of the rope tied, fashioned to some hook that might have been used to hang up tools or something else at one point, and she untied it and hoisted him up. He choked furiously as his breath was cut off by the noose, and Ellie made sure he was far enough off the ground before she grabbed something else important - the stool. 

When preparing, Joel had intentionally cut off two of the legs, making it wobbling and unsteady. She put it underneath him and guided his legs to it, and then he took a wheezing breath as the pressure was released from his neck while his feet wobbled on it unsteadily. 

“What the fuck?” He barked out, obviously trying to sound intimidating when he was so breathless. “What the hell is wrong with you?! You’re fucking insane!” 

Ellie took a step back, looking up at him with a neutral expression. He was entirely powerless. He couldn’t swing and hit her, he couldn’t run. If he jumped, he would hang himself. He was completely at her mercy, and he had to listen to what she had to say. 

In regards to the question, she shrugged. 

“Maybe.” She said simply. “I just wanna talk.” 

“Oh, you wanna talk?!” He growled out the words in anger, still trying to sound lager and more powerful than he was. 

And then, all too predictably, he swung out his leg in an attempt to kick her. 

Ellie easily dodged it, and the motion made him unsteady on the stool. Both his legs fell off, and she simply watched as he struggled, hanging freely by the noose for a few moments. He sputtered and choked, kicking around frantically to get his feet back on the stool. It was a wonder that he didn’t knock it over. 

Eventually, he did get back up to stand on it before he passed out. He continued to choke on the air, veins bulging in his face from the effort. All while Ellie stood back, arms crossed, staring at him condescendingly. 

“That was stupid.” She commented quietly. 

“Fuck you!” He choked out. 

“Look, the way I see it, you have two choices. Maybe three.” Ellie explained. 

He glared at her with absolute poison in his eyes, but remained silent and still, other than the tremors in his legs as he struggled to balance on the stool. 

“Option one: you continue being a petty bitch, so I leave you here.” She told him simply. “You can test your endurance for a few hours, maybe even a few days. But no one will find you, if they come looking at all. And eventually, your legs will give out from exhaustion and you’ll hang.” 

“Y/N will come for me.” He replied confidently. The devilish smirk that spread across his face gave Ellie the urge to smack him. 

“No.” Ellie argued, just as quick, just as confident. “You really think Y/N is gonna be able to find you?” 

This was the mind game Joel had talked about. He was right in Jackson, right under your nose. Would he shout for help, or would he believe that he was out in the middle of nowhere, stranded somewhere that you would never be able to find him? 

His silence was all too telling. Ellie resisted the urge to smile, knowing how important a firm, intimidating face was in this situation. 

“Option two,” She continued on, taking his silence as a sure sign that he didn’t like option one. “You can listen to what I have to say, and you can get agreeable about it real fast.” 

“What’s option three?” He asked. 

Of course, he didn’t like option two either. He didn’t like being agreeable. 

But Ellie had a feeling that in a few minutes, option two would be the one that he’d beg for. 

“You say something I don’t like,” She got her switchblade out of her back pocket, and clicked the switch to show off the sharp, shiny blade. “And then I kill you.” 

There was a pointed moment of silence as he looked between the sharp point of her knife and her unforgiving, deadly calm expression. For a moment, his enraged face wavered, and then came fear. It was just a flicker, but Ellie saw it as weakness. And she was going to exploit it. 

“What the fuck do you want?” He barked. 

“It’s very simple.” Ellie explained. “Leave Y/N the fuck alone. Get your shit, leave town, and get as far away from her as possible.” 

“That’s my sister.” He argued. “That’s my blood. You can’t just expect me to abandon the only family I have, I-” 

“If you respected her as your family, you wouldn’t fucking beat her.” Ellie cut him off, the words turning to poison on her tongue. 

He looked intensely caught in that moment, his expression becoming ghostly. As if he somehow hadn’t figured out that this whole thing was about his abusive ways. 

“What? You don’t like me ‘cause I protect her? ‘Cause I look out for her?” He immediately switched, swelling into that self righteous, taunting person he was with you. “You wanna fuck her, don’t you? You fucking self righteous rug muncher, think you know what’s better for my own sister than I do! What the hell is wrong with you? You-” 

As he ranted, Ellie stepped forward and hesitantly grabbed the waistband of his pants. Clearly, the message wasn’t getting through to him. 

And though it was something more disgusting to her than blood, guts, viscera, even the smell of an old moldy building - Ellie yanked down his pants in one swift movement, trying to ignore the sight of it in front of her. She placed her switchblade right at the spot where his dick met his inner thigh, simply resting it there. 

The feeling of the cold metal in such a sensitive spot easily shut him up. His stomach clenched as he held his breath, likely waiting for Ellie to cut him. 

With him on the stool, it was hovering at around eye level, and she tried her hardest not to look directly at it. For you, it was worth it. That’s what she told herself. 

“Listen carefully,” Ellie told him, her voice still low, still deadly calm. “You are going to agree to my terms, or they’re going to find your body missing this.” She threatened him, gently nudging the blade upwards, not yet cutting into flesh. 

He gasped, shock and horror crashing through his system. He continued to struggle with balancing on the stool, struggling not to lean into the knife by accident and maim himself by mistake. 

He looked at Ellie with terror in his eyes, but oddly enough, he didn’t say anything. Ellie considered it progress. 

“I’m going to be very generous,” She said lowly, making it sound like a threat. “You have twenty four hours to get your shit, and get the hell out of Jackson. I don’t give a fuck what you tell Y/N. In fact, you don’t have to tell her anything at all. Just disappear. I don’t care where you go. Just get the fuck away from here. The farther, the better.” 

Ellie paused, letting her words hang in the air for a moment. 

“If you’re still in town by sundown tomorrow, I will kill you.” She said. “If you tell Y/N about this little incident, I will kill you. If I see Y/N later and she has a single scratch on her-” 

“You’ll kill me.” He quickly finished off the sentence as he thought she would say it. 

Ellie shook her head, putting on a wicked grin of her own for the first time during the conversation. 

“No.” She said, a chuckle peeking through her voice. “I’ll make it slow. I’ll make you beg for death. I’ll make you wish that you had taken this very fucking generous first offer.”

There was another silence, filled only by the wobbling legs of the stool rocking against the ground, and the man’s anxious breaths. 

Ellie wondered if he was stupid enough to decline her generosity. 

“Okay.” He finally agreed. 

Ellie hoped that she wouldn’t have to follow through on her threats, but she wouldn’t hesitate to. 

She took her knife away from his crotch, leaving a small nick on his inner thigh that would hopefully serve as a good enough reminder of what he was supposed to do. 

Of course, the temptation to hurt him more brutally was there. She knew that if Joel came home and she was covered in blood - he would help her clean up. He would help her hide the body. But Ellie knew that this was about something bigger than herself, her own rage, her own guilt. 

It was about keeping your conscience clean. 

She knew that if you ever found out that she had killed your brother, no matter the reason, no matter the situation - the guilt would fall back onto you. You would spend the rest of your days wondering how you could have done things differently to solve a problem that was never your fault. So she would take the burden of guilt or fault off of you, and force it onto him - where it belonged. He would get to live, but he would never go near you. Not ever again. 

After thinking about all of this for a moment, and calming herself, Ellie unceremoniously cut him down, letting him fall into the middle of the floor with a grunt. She pulled his pants back up and shoved a bag over his head. The bag something else that Joel had woven into the plan - another scare tactic. 

She kept his arms bound behind him as she struggled to lug him all the way across town without getting caught. He struggled against her hold and spoke up every now and then, demanding to be released, but Ellie simply kicked him and told him to shut up. It worked well. It seemed that he was truly afraid of her, because he was much more docile now than the man who had risked hanging himself to kick her in the head. 

She dumped him on the back porch of your house and cut the ties on his wrist. He could feel stupid later for the fact that he had been in town the whole time, not secluded off in the woods someplace you would never find him. He yanked the bag off his head and looked up at Ellie with pure scorn in his eyes, and she held up her knife once more, reminding him just how sharp it was as she left him with some parting words. 

“Sundown. Tomorrow.” She told him firmly. “Or Y/N won’t even find the pieces of you scattered out in those woods.” 

Ellie was surprised when he didn’t say a single word, didn’t even hurl any insults at her back as she walked away. 

She had no idea that he was happy to cut his losses, thinking that you weren’t worth the trouble if Ellie was willing to kidnap, threaten, and eventually kill for you. 

Ellie went to bed early and hoped that everything had worked. 

She woke up from a deep, hazy sleep to pounding on her door. 

She struggled to get out of bed, thinking there was some kind of emergency. She flicked on a light and opened the door, and you came rushing inside. 

Ellie almost didn’t see you through her sleep dulled eyes, her lids still half-closed, but she recognized your voice as she closed the door behind you. 

“My brother is gone.” You said, your voice edging between worry and fear. Ellie thought you might be relieved. She didn’t know that you were still tentative - scared that he might come back, terrified it was a trick. “It’s just - he just packed up all his things, and when I woke up, he was gone. And he left me this note.” 

You thrust a piece of paper into Ellie’s hands, and she blinked her sticky eyes open a few times in order to read it. She scanned over the messy writing, barely absorbing it. It was some bullshit about how Jackson ‘wasn’t right for him’ and he felt ‘suffocated’ and he was going to travel to catch up with your group who had gone to the coast, he thought he was a man of the sea, blah blah - but you needed to stay in Jackson, because it would be safer for you. 

“It’s a trick.” You announced as Ellie read over the words. Your voice quaked, your throat tight with fear. When Ellie looked up, tears were dancing in your eyes. There were sharp scratches on your neck - they were scabbing over, and a greenish bruise on your cheek that was fading. “It’s gotta be a trick. He’s testing me. He wants me to - to follow him? Or he’s coming back, or-” 

Ellie tossed the paper aside, uncaring of where it landed, and then stepped toward you, grasping your face with gentle hands. 

“It’s okay.” She said calmly. “He’s gone.” 

She echoed the words you had said that night, letting you know that she had miraculously granted your request. 

If it was true, then you would consider her a guardian angel. But you almost couldn’t bring yourself to believe it. 

“You did something.” You said quietly. It wasn’t accusing. It was a simple truth. You swallowed thickly. You waited before you asked your next question. “Is he dead?” 

You would have hated to think that Ellie would go through so much trouble to frame his murder as him simply leaving town. 

“Would you hate me if he was?” She replied. 

Strangely enough, you had no clue how to feel. 

Ellie saw the warring on your face, the years of pain tethering in your soul, and hoped to release you from it. 

“He’s alive.” She sighed, a heavy awful truth floating from her lips. You looked somewhat relieved, but then that fear pricked into your big, sad eyes once again. “He’s not coming back. I can promise you that.” 

If he did, Ellie would kill him. But she didn’t speak those words to you. 

You lunged forward then, tightening your hands around her back, squeezing her with intense, passionate ferocity as you pressed your face into her shoulder and began to sob. Ellie held you dutifully, trying her hardest to be gentle with you, petting smoothly over your back as her heart ached at the sound of your cries. She had no idea that it was relief - pure relief exhaling from your lungs, the feeling of finally being able to breathe with the presence of that dark tormentor no longer hanging over your life. 

“Thank you.” You sobbed, clutching onto her shirt. “Thank you, Ellie. Thank you.” 

… 

When Joel came back from his patrol, he asked where Ellie had buried the body. She sighed and told him that the guy had made the wise decision to leave town. Completely of his own accord. He shrugged and said he didn’t care either way - he just wanted to meet the ‘lovely young woman who was worth going through all the trouble for’. 

Ellie invited you over for steaks at Joel’s house a few days later, and artfully dodged all the questions about whether you were dating or not. 

… 

A few months later, when winter thawed out and spring had come around once again, Ellie had taken you beyond the walls of Jackson once again, both of you delighting in the purity of everything nature had to offer, and your newfound freedom. 

“Is it just me or is the air out here… fresher?” You posed, inhaling deeply as you threw your head back, truly basking in the nature around you. 

Ellie giggled at this, and you threw a smile back over your shoulder at her. You walked along the path, bobbing between the trees and enjoying the greenery as it thawed out from the snow. 

“It’s the mountains, there’s nothing but fresh air up here.” Ellie chuckled. “As far as I’m concerned, it beats living in the city. That place stunk to high hell. People piled on top of each other, old rotting buildings, no trees anywhere.” 

You let out a small laugh at this. It wasn’t Ellie’s greatest work in comedy, but your lungs felt much lighter these days, and she soaked up the sound like the new saplings soaking up the sun. 

She had also noticed your choice of attire for the day. For her, there was still that small nip in the air, something indicating that there might be one last frost left to the year, something that made her want to wear a sweater. But you had worn a short sleeved tee shirt with your jeans, and Ellie preened at the fact that there was not a single bruise anywhere on your skin. Some old scars that she could never have the hopes of reversing, but more and more lately, your smile outshined all of them. 

“Ooh, look at this!” Ellie came to crouch at a small patch of grass, what you didn’t recognize as thick reeds that were somewhat special to her. 

“What is it?” You asked. 

“Joel taught me this.” She noted, making you even more intrigued. 

Ellie plucked one out of the dirt, and held it between her two palms before she held it up to her two lips and blew - it made a sharp noise like a duck’s call, and you instantly began giggling at this delightfully strange sound. 

“Okay, how did you do that?” You asked, kneeling down beside her. 

Ellie grabbed up another one and put it in your hands, positioning them well. After a nod from her, you put it to your lips and gave a hard breath. You dissolved into laughter once again when it made that strange sound. 

“I love that.” Ellie commented, absolutely beaming herself. 

“What? You play the guitar but your favorite instrument is grass?” You joked. 

“No.” She replied. “I love that smile.” She told you, motioning up toward your face. “That’s why I fell in love with you.” 

“Els.” You murmured quietly, unable to truly explain the wave of emotion that came over you - being intensely thankful for her saving you, changing the course of your life, the swelling of love you felt for her and how it only grew with time. 

Ellie didn’t need words. She leaned in and kissed you then, and you - for the first time in a long time - relaxed into her love and let yourself be happy. 

From time to time, you were tempted to ask what exactly it was that she had done to make your brother go away. But as the months ticked on and your relationship developed - as Ellie helped you navigate your freedom and enjoy the sweeter things in life, you found that you truly didn’t care.

...

A/N: This is a standalone oneshot, so please do not ask about a sequel or a continuation for it, because there won't be one. If you liked it and you want to comment on it, please comment on the body of work that I have written. Or feel free to check out the many other works I have written on my TLOU Masterlist. Thank you!!

#sundrop writes #ellie williams x you #ellie williams x reader #ellie the last of us #ellie williams #ellie tlou #ellie x reader #ellie x fem reader #the last of us

[doodlevich]

DTIYS: Mickey + Puppy 🐶

For dear Harvey’s challenge!❤️ @mikhailoisbaby

I got inspired by Mickey and the dog and wondered how Ian would fit in to the whole things… and then a wrote a little au meetcute fic about it for good measure :-)

🔽🔽🔽

“The fuck is wrong with that thing?”

Ian glances over his shoulder and in doing so almost trips over a tree root sticking out of the ground.

Standing in front of him is a gorgeous, dark haired man, sporting blue eyes that basically pierce Ian’s fucking soul. He’s wearing various shades of black and the look of disgust curling up his sharp features tells Ian that the guy wouldn’t like it much if he was referred to as ‘slightly petite’.

But he is, though. Just Ian’s type.

“What’s w-wrong with what?” Ian sputters, at a loss for words as he takes it all in. Then he remembers he happens to be holding a shivering chihuahua wrapped in a pink puffer doggie vest and pink booties to match.

Goddamnit Tami.

“Oh? The chihuahua?” Ian chuckles once the pieces all click. “She belongs to my sister-in-law. I’m dog-sitting while she and my brother visit her family.”

The dark haired stranger snorts. “If you can call that a dog.” He reaches down to pat his own animal on the head, and Ian realizes he was so caught up with the man than he didn’t even notice the pit-bull by his side. “Looks like it’s one wrong move away from being lunch-meat.”

Ian shrugs. It’s a fair point.

“Yeaaaah, Penelope it’s one for picking fights.” The Chihuahua wriggles in the crook of his arm and yips at the mention of her name.

The man snorts. “Penelope? Jesus Christ, man.”

“Fitting right?” Ian smiles at the pitbull’s blissed our expression as the mystery man scratches below the chin. “What’s his name then?” He nods towards the larger dog. “Monster-mutt? Grave-digger? Maximum Destruction?”

The man laughs, a low rumble, and it’s the best thing Ian’s ever heard with his own two ears.

“First off, stop listing names of fuckin’ monster trucks.” He snorts. “And second, her name is Lia.”

Ian laughs along. “And you’re over here busting Penelope’s balls for having a cutesy name?”

The man shrugs. “She already had a name when I adopted her from the rescue shelter. Not gonna confuse her by re-naming her.”

“She’s a rescue dog, huh?” Everything Ian learns makes him want to know more about this guy. “Mind if I ask her owner’s name?” Ian can’t tell if he’s being smooth or coming across as a dumbass, but the man seems amused regardless.

“Me? Name’s Mickey.” He extends his hand to shake, and before Ian takes it he notices the knuckle tats- yet another factor to drive him wild. “How about you? Got a name?”

“Ian.” Ian shakes his hand firmly, and it feels like more than a mere formality. He swears he’s not imagining it- there’s a spark when they touch, and Ian realizes he can’t waste an opportunity to change his life for the better.

“You up to anything after this?” Ian asks, projecting all the confidence he can muster. “I know a bar about a block from here that’s dog-friendly…”

Mickey’s eyebrows shoot up, and for a moment Ian wonders if he’s reading the signals wrong. Then a grin appears on Mickey’s face.

“You askin’ me on a date, Ian?”

Ian’s face heats up, but he’s giddy, something he hasn’t felt in years. “Maybe. If that’s what you wanna call it. Kinda just want to get to know you better, Mickey.”

“You’re in luck then, cuz I love a good mid-day beer.” Mickey sets off down the park path, motioning for Ian to follow him. “And a drinking buddy wouldn’t be so bad, either.”

It takes Ian a moment to realize that this is Mickey’s way of saying ‘yes’, but once he does, he’s jogging to catch up, Penelope bouncing in the crook of his arm.

Something tells Ian he’s just made the best decision of his life.

#dtiys #gallavich #mickey milkovich #ian gallagher #gallavich fanart #ian and mickey #ian x mickey #shameless fanart #digital art #gallavich fic

[samcarpentersgirlfriend]

I REMEMBER IT ALL TOO WELL || MICKEY ALTIERI X READER 𖤐₊˚.

summary: you can’t understand any of this - least at all how mickey could do this to you.

warnings: past relationship, dead / ghostface!mickey, angst, swearing

word count: 1k

a/n: okay this came to me at like 4am and I wanted to write it all before I lost all inspiration so sorry if it isn’t any good or has any errors (also I suck at titles so ignore that too thank you <3)

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹

A part of you still doesn’t believe it.

Because there’s no way in hell that Mickey - sweet, attentive Mickey, the boy you loved more than anything in this world, was the same person who had brutally murdered your classmates. And he’d enjoyed it, from what Sid had said.

She hasn’t told you anything directly - no, Sidney Prescott was much to good of a person to do that. You’d heard her describe the whole thing to the police whilst you yourself awaited questioning. They’d thought you were an accomplice, the Bonnie to his Clyde - and you couldn’t exactly blame them. Even you could admit it was all too convenient: you were still alive without so much as a scratch, a fellow film student and long-term partner of Mickey himself. If you were an outsider, you probably would’ve thought you were in on it too. Many still did - you didn’t miss the whispers and stares as you shuffled through the hallways.

Sidney - the one who arguably should’ve distrusted you the most - was surprisingly the one fighting your corner, claiming she could see how much you’d truly loved Mickey. That you were just as much as a victim in this as she was. You personally thought that was complete and utter bullshit, but you appreciate the sentiment nonetheless.

Some sick part of you envied Sidney and selfishly wished you were there to see Mickey unmask himself - at least then you’d have the chance to ask him all the questions you’d never get the chance to now. Because Mickey- your Mickey - was dead, his bullet-ridden corpse lying God knows where. You hated yourself for mourning his death, what with all the pain he had caused. He’d killed your friends, he’d killed good people, and you should hate him. You should be glad that he’s dead.

But how could you be when he’d had the biggest heart you’d ever known, determined to make you smile even in the darkest of times? How could you hate the boy who promised you the world, who looked at you like you were the most valuable treasure there ever was? How could you pretend like he didn’t kiss you like you were oxygen itself and he was positively drowning without you, like he didn’t make you feel safe and excited and absolutely adored all at once?

No. The Mickey you loved couldn’t possibly be the killer. He was funny and carefree and gentle, not sadistic in the slightest. It just doesn’t make sense. In your mind, they were two different people - your beloved boyfriend and the twisted murderer. There was no overlap, there couldn’t be. You know it’s stupid; Mickey didn’t magically transform into this - this monster overnight. He was going on dates with you by day and throwing girls off of balconies by night, leading a complete double life at once. You loathed yourself for not seeing it. You didn’t know what signs to look out for when your boyfriend was a homicidal psychopath, but you were sure that you must’ve missed a dozen. You were too caught up in the fairytale that was you and Mickey, too caught up in perfect pictures of shared apartments and romantic getaways.

Maybe if you hadn’t been such a fool, you could’ve stopped this whole mess sooner. You could’ve turned Mickey in to the police, and he wouldn’t have been a threat to anyone.

No. Deep down, you know that isn’t true.

Mickey was so convincing, so charming, that you would’ve done anything for him. He would only have to ask with that perfect fucking smile of his and you would lie for him. Protect him. He’d spin a story about how he was doing this for the right reasons, doing this for you, and you’d capitulate. You had no idea how he did it, but Mickey just had something about him that made it easy to see things his way. something that made you willing to twist your morals just enough in the wrong direction. You despise that fact, and you’re suddenly grateful that he didn’t ask you to cover for him - shit, ask you to join him - because at least now you can pretend that you know for certain your answer would be a resounding “go to hell.”

You wonder if everything you knew was a lie. It had to be, right? Mickey must’ve been using you, there was no other explanation for it. Except for the fact that you were truly of no use to him. He didn’t need you to get close to Sidney - you’d met her through him to begin with. You weren’t some genius mastermind he could use to help with his plans, and he hadn’t even used you as an alibi. Maybe you were just a bit of fun on the side, a silly little plaything to keep him occupied whilst he wasn’t actively on his murder spree.

But it felt all too real. You think back to the times you were laying on Mickey’s chest, watching bad action movies whilst he picked them apart the entire time. The times he’d stayed up all night to help you with some last minute essay you’d had due the next day. What reason would he have to to do all of that?

Unless he truly did love you. That somehow is even worse. It means that adored you as much as he claimed he did yet he still did what he did; he threw your entire relationship away over some stupid fucking trial. The infamy obviously meant more to him than you ever did.

Everything about this is so damn unfair. You want to scream. You want to sink to your knees and sob. You want to bring Mickey back to life so you can kill him all over again yourself. You want him to hold you close and whisper into your ear that it’s all going to be okay.

You want your boyfriend back.

#scream x reader #scream x you #mickey altieri x reader #mickey altieri x y/n #mickey altieri x you #scream #scream 2 #mickey altieri #scream 2 x reader #scream imagine #timothy olyphant #timothy olyphant x reader #fanfic #fanfiction

[eddiemunsons80sbaby]

A Moment Changes Everything

Pairing: EddieMunsonxReader

Request: I had one in mind where reader and Eddie are about to face the bats with Dustin and they are dating and she's the Byers sister too but she decided to go to California to help the others and her and Eddie say goodbye and promise to see each other soon and she hears Eddie died but when she comes back they find out he's in the hospital alive and when he is healed and back at her house she cries and they comfort each other and when the entire gang decided to celebrate they go to the beach in California and they know Eddie is gonna propose and he foes om the beach with everyone and later they are together and make love and after that they talk about the future in bed? :)

18+ Only

“Shit,” muttered Eddie, grasping your hands like a vice in his large ones, so tight his rings were digging into your skin, but you didn’t care. “I hate this.”

“I know. Me too,” you said softly, blinking back the tears that had been threatening to fall since you’d made your decision yesterday and booked a flight to California. When your mom chose to move, you had begged her to let you finish your senior year, not wanting to leave your boyfriend and all your friends. You’d hoped it might actually be a normal year but you should have known better. “But Will is my brother, and he’s in trouble…again. And Jonathan and El…Eddie, I have to help them.”

“I know. I understand why but that doesn’t mean I have to like it,” Eddie replied, each word coming out choked with tears that hadn’t yet fallen but broke your heart just the same. “I can’t lose you, princess. I hate the thought of you going halfway across the country to face this thing without me.”

“You’re going to be facing this thing without me, too,” you countered. “Do you think I love the idea of you and Dustin facing those demon bats? Do you think I love the idea of Steve, Robin, and Nancy going into that house to face Vecna himself? I don’t. I hate it, but this is what we do. It’s what we’ve done ever since my brother disappeared. We step up, we look out for each other, and we kick evil’s ass.”

A harsh laugh rose up from Eddie as he shook his head, “This shit is insane. I still can’t believe there is a whole other dimension with monsters and bad shit. I can’t believe that you’ve been fighting this shit for three years. When you told me…Will, the mall fire…I mean, this is Hawkins. Nothing happens in this shithole.”

“Well, this is happening,” you stated. “Eddie, we have to do this. We have to take down Vecna so he can’t hurt anyone else and we have to clear your name.”

“Yeah,” he scoffed,eyes dropping to the ground, “fat chance there. This whole town has already convicted me. I’m a devil worshiping freak, remember?”

“Hey,” you protested, taking his chin in your hand and lifting his eyes to yours. Those soft pools the color of the Earth peeked at you through his mess of hair, so sad, so full of anguish, that it almost caused you to change your mind and your plan. But no, you had to do this. When Will called, you couldn’t tell him no. Your little brother needed you, your mom was in Alaska for a work conference, and you weren’t letting him face the bastard who’d been tormenting him for years without you. “Eddie, you are a freak. You’re my freak and I adore you. You are unapologetically you and I love that about you. You don’t walk around, pretending to be something, pretending to fit into some tidy little box, just to make people happy. Fuck all these townies. Who cares what they think. We are going to clear you name and then you and I are going to start our lives.”

“Promise?” he asked, hands coming to your hips and pulling you against him. “Promise that you’re coming home? Promise that you’ll always be my girl?”

“I promise,” you assured him, the easiest promise you’d ever made. “There is no one but you. I am coming home to you when this is all over. Promise me that you’ll be careful and you’ll make it out of this thing in one piece, okay? No crazy hero antics.”

“Princess, look at me,” Eddie said with a small smile. “I am no hero.”

“You’re my hero,” you argued, pulling down the neck of your shirt to show the angry red bite mark you still had. “If you hadn’t been there with that oar, this could have gone a whole lot differently. Don’t sell yourself short, Munson. You dove right into that lake with the rest of us. You’re brave. You just don’t like people to know it.”

“I only dove in because you did, you asshole,” he snorted. “I couldn’t let you swim off to save Steve and die or something.”

“But that’s my point. You could have stayed in the boat and let us handle it, but you didn’t. You dove in because someone you care about was in trouble.”

“No,” he said slowly, his tongue darting out to run along his bottom lip, back and forth, back and forth, just like it always did when he was deep in thought or on edge. “I dove in because…” Eddie paused, meeting your eyes with his own, “someone I love was in trouble.”

Your breath caught at his words. Had he really just said that? You and Eddie had been dating for a year now and you’d known how you felt about him six months ago but had been terrified to be the first to say it. What if it scared him away? But if finding out the Upside Down exists, that the mall fire was actually a giant body part goo monster, and that you’ve battled misshapen dogs with flowers for faces hadn’t scared him away, then nothing could, right?

“You love me?” you asked hesitantly, needing verification that you’d heard what you’d thought you’d heard.

“Yeah, I do,” Eddie nodded, swallowing so hard you could see his Adam’s apple bob with the force. “Look, you don’t have to say it back. I just needed to tell you before…you know.” There went that tongue again. “Anyway, I’m not just saying it because we could die. I mean, I am, but I mean it. I really fucking mean it, sweetheart. I’ve loved you from the moment you hit my van in the school parking lot. I was so pissed and then you stepped out of the car and it was like…bam, heart gone. I just, I didn’t want to scare you off by being too aggressive. I mean, who thought love at first sight was real, right? Like, that’s some bullshit that…”

“Eddie,” you said, cutting off his nervous rambling, taking his face in your hands. “I love you too.”

“Really?” he asked tentatively, one side of his mouth curving into a hopeful smile. “You’re not saying that because I said it?”

“No, you doofus,” you laughed. “I love you. So, you have to stay alive, okay? This isn’t some dumbass movie where they finally admit their feelings and then the worst happens. I want my future with you. So, you better be careful.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he nodded. “This isn’t goodbye. This is see you soon.”

Then he pulled you in, pressing his lips to yours in a kiss that felt very much like a goodbye. You pushed the thought away, telling yourself it was going to be fine. You’d fought these monsters before and you always won. You tried not to think about those who didn’t make it out because that wasn’t going to happen this time. Everything was going to be okay. 

____________________________________________________________

“Is it over?” you asked, your eyes darting to your brother, Jonathan’s, as El clung to Mike, soaked from the sensory deprivation bath you’d made her in the deep freezer. 

“No idea,” he admitted, eyes wide, shaking his head. 

Mike helped El climb out of the freezer and you grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around the shivering girl’s shoulders. She looked so small and frail in this moment but you knew she was anything but. This girl was a force, a damn superhero. You knew when you’d spoken to Jonathan a few days ago that El was your best shot at defeating this bastard once and for all. You just hoped she’d succeeded, having no idea what had happened in her mind fight with Vecna. 

“Man, that was the craziest shit I have ever seen,” Argyle announced. “You were all shaking and the lights were flickering. Did you kick his ass? Is he gone?”

El’s eyes met yours and you knew something had gone wrong, something had gone horribly wrong. Her eyes should have shown relief, a sense of victory, but all you saw was despair, pain, and regret. Dropping to your knees in front of you, you took El’s hands, warming them with your own, needing to know what she knew. 

“El…what happened?”

Her eyes brimmed with tears as she looked at each of you in turn, “I…he’s weak, but he’s not gone. Max…he got Max before I could stop him. I let him overpower me and Max is really hurt. I don’t know if she’s okay.” El paused, pressing her lips together, and then she was holding your hands, she was comforting you instead of the other way around and it felt like ice water had been poured down your spine. “I am so sorry. I saw…everything he was doing. He showed me all our friends, the way he was hurting them. Most of them got out okay but Eddie…” She stopped, one hand coming to cup your cheek. “I am so sorry. Eddie didn’t make it. He…”

You snatched your hands from her, falling backward onto your butt, shaking your head to clear away the words she’d just spoken. No. You couldn’t believe it. You wouldn’t believe it. Eddie couldn’t be gone. It wasn’t possible. He’d promised he’d see you again. You’d promised. You and him were supposed to graduate and start your life together. He couldn’t be gone. 

“No…no…” you mumbled over and over. 

“He fought so hard. He helped save the others. He was a hero but the bats…there were too many and he…”

“Stop!” you screamed, covering your ears with your hands. “Shut up! Just stop!”

“Hey,” Jonathan said softly, kneeling next to you, placing his hands on your shoulders. 

“Don’t touch me! No! You say friends don’t lie but you’re lying!” you yelled and then a sound clawed its way up from your throat, a desperate scream that tore from you. Your body was ripping apart, pieces of you being shred away and you couldn’t do this. You couldn’t be here with these people anymore. These people who couldn’t understand, would never understand, who barely even knew him. 

“I am so sorry, but just try to take some deep breaths and calm down,” Will pleaded, dropping to your other side. 

The world was closing in on you. You grasped at your shirt, unable to breathe, a noose tightening around your neck, your heart in a vice that was squeezing until it was fracturing into tiny pieces. You leapt up from the floor and ran from the pizza place, having no idea where you were going, not even caring, just knowing you had to get away. You had to get away from those words. 

___________________________________________________________

You sat in silence in the back of the Surfer Boy Pizza van as the others talked. It had been a long road trip from California to Indiana but everyone was desperate to get home and see the faces of those they loved, to prove to themselves that they were alright. You wanted that too but it felt like a punch to the gut every single time you remembered that the face you ached to see the most wouldn’t be there. 

You had been driving straight through, Jonathan and Argyle taking turns napping in the back of the van. They hadn’t asked you to drive, which was fine with you. You weren’t sure you could focus enough to get everyone there safe. Mike had tried calling every time you had stopped for restroom breaks or food but it was always a busy signal, like the lines were down. If El’s visions were correct, Hawkins was in bad shape. 

Jonathan and Will had taken turns trying to talk to you but you simply kept your gaze focused out the window. You knew your brothers meant well. They didn’t want to see you hurting. They only wanted to make you feel better but there was nothing anyone could do, nothing anyone could say. Your grief was a gaping chasm, swallowing you whole and no one could stop it. 

You closed your eyes, those warm brown eyes, the color of the Earth that nurtures new life, the color of a warm cup of soothing tea, the color of melted chocolate, instantly popping into your vision. You squeezed your eyes tighter, swallowing down the lump of tears that were lodging in your throat. How could you face another sunrise knowing you wouldn’t see his face? How could you face another sunset knowing his arms wouldn’t be there to hold you while you slept? You couldn’t. This wasn’t life…this was mere existence. 

“Holy shit,” you heard Jonathan say from the driver’s seat. 

Slowly opening your eyes, you took in the sight of car after car heading in the opposite direction, away from Hawkins, away from the hell on Earth that this place had become. Jonathan turned into town and your jaw dropped, eyes widening, a knot forming in your gut at the sight of your home. The library was destroyed, appearing as if a flaming sword had cleaved it in two. The streets were rubble, power lines down, emergency crews blocking off everything. You saw people standing in line outside of the school, looking for shelter. It was a national disaster of epic proportions and no one knew the real reason why. 

“Damn…this place is crispy fried,” Argyle commented, turning his head to take in the sights. 

Jonathan headed toward the Wheeler’s, where everyone usually congregated in the hopes your friends would be there. As a familiar head of curly hair came into view, a small sob erupted from within you. Dustin had always been your favorite of Will’s friends and he was the whole reason you and Eddie had become a couple. Jonathan laid on the horn, the now familiar tune playing and catching everyone’s attention. 

They all turned, identical looks of confusion on their faces. Until you parked and started to climb out. Then those confused faces became relieved faces, smiles breaking out. The Hawkins crew raced forward, everyone embracing each other in relief. You stood back by the van, unsure what to do with yourself. You were so happy to see so many of them were okay but unable to join in. 

Dustin glanced over Mike’s shoulder to you, his brow furrowing in concern. He walked over, pulling you into an embrace and all those tears you’d been fighting back came pouring out. He had to be just as brokenhearted as you were, having loved Eddie almost, if not just as much as you did. 

“Whoa, hey, Mike said you guys are all okay,” Dustin said softly, his hand rubbing your back gently. “Did something else happen?”

“El…Eddie…she saw…bats…” you choked, incapable of getting completely thoughts out. “I can’t…oh god…Dustin…”

His hands gripped your shoulders, holding you at arm’s length, “Hey, it’s okay. I mean, yeah, he did get attacked by bats in the Upside Down but he…” Dustin paused. “Shit, you don’t know…”

___________________________________________________________

You paused outside the hospital room, placing your hand on the wall for support. You’d just spent the last two days thinking he was gone. When Dustin told you that he’d survived, your heart had swelled with joy and then your entire body deflated with a relief that had your knees buckling, hitting the ground. Dustin said he was alive but in pretty bad shape and you had no idea what that meant. You tried to mentally prepare yourself for what you were about to see but how could you prepare yourself when you had no idea what to expect?

“Hey, it’s okay,” Dustin assured you, taking your hand in his own. “I’m going to be with you the whole time, okay?”

You nodded, inhaling through your nose and slowly releasing it through your lips. The two of you passed through the doorway and an animalist keening rose from within you at the sight before you. Dustin wrapped his arm around your waist, helping to steady you as he guided you toward the bed.

“I know. It looks bad. He…he hasn’t woken up yet,” Dustin said softly, his voice choked with emotion. “But he’s Eddie. He’s stubborn as hell. He’s going to pull through this. I know he is.”

The words would not come. You couldn’t respond as you took in the sight of the man you loved more than anything in the world laying in the bed in front of you. His neck, shoulder, torso, and legs were covered in bandages. He was hooked up to a ventilator to help him breathe.

“He was so damn brave. I mean stupid as shit, but brave. He cut the sheet and moved the mattress so I couldn’t follow him. He decided to be bait for the bats to give the others more time. I tried to get to him. I jumped through the gate but…I fell and I hurt myself and I just wasn’t fast enough. By the time I got there, Jesus, I thought he was a goner. I’m so sorry I couldn’t get there in time.”

You wrapped your arm around the sweet boy’s shoulders, pulling him into your side, “No, Dustin. You can’t blame yourself. Eddie made a choice and you…jumping through that gate, going after him like that, you were so brave too. Don’t ever think anything different. If you guys hadn’t gone through, none of us might be standing here right now.”

“Yeah, but now Eddie is in this hospital and we don’t know if he’s even going to be okay. Was it even worth it?”

“Of course it was,” you assured him. “Eddie…it’s awful, but so many people would have lost their lives if we hadn’t done what we did. It was the only option. None of us could have lived with ourselves if we had let Vecna win.”

Dustin nodded and you slowly released him, going to sit on the edge of Eddie’s bed. Your finger gently traced along his nose, his cheekbones, those beautifully full lips. He had to be okay. He just had to be. You already thought you’d lost him once. The world could not be so cruel as to make you lose him twice. It just couldn’t. 

“Eddie, it’s me,” you whispered, your words wracked with sobs. “I’m here, baby. You were so damn brave. I am so fucking mad at you for it but you’re my hero. We won, baby. We won and we never could have done it without you. But I need you to wake up now, okay? I need you to open those sweet brown eyes for me because we have so much still to do together. You promised me, remember? You promised you’d come back and we would start our lives together. I won’t let you out of it. You have to come back to me.”

Dustin’s hand landed on your shoulder, squeezing lightly as you both looked at your favorite person in the world, willing him to wake up. All the monsters, all the fighting, all the bullshit and for what? For you to lose the one person you couldn’t live without? Hadn’t your group lost enough over the last few years? Hadn’t you been through enough pain, enough trauma, for ten lifetimes? This wasn’t fair. This would never be fair. But then that was life, wasn’t it? It kicked you when you were down and it didn’t care how badly it tore you up. Barb, Bob, Billy…it was too much. You couldn’t survive if you lost Eddie too. 

“Hey, maybe we should go so you can get some rest,” offered Dustin after what felt like hours of the two of you just anxiously watching Eddie for any change. “You’ve been through hell and you guys drove all the way here from California.”

“No,” you asserted, shaking your head. “No. I am not going anywhere until I know if he’s okay. I’m not leaving him again.”

“Okay, I just…”

Dustin gasped and you followed his line of sight to Eddie. His eyes were blinking open. Your heart seized in your chest as you grasped his hand. 

“Eddie?” you asked hopefully.

“Hey princess,” he murmured. “I promised you I’d come back, didn’t I?”

____________________________________________________________

“Seriously guys, I can walk myself,” grumbled Eddie, slung between Steve and Dustin as they half carried him into the house. 

After three weeks in the hospital, he’d finally been released. You’d spent every single day by his side. He wasn’t completely healed. Eddie was going to need some time but he was definitely better, the bites having scarred over, the skin around them tough and jagged. You’d caught glimpses of them here and there but Eddie kept insisting that you leave the room when the nurse came in to change his dressings. 

“No can do, man,” Steve stated, waiting for you to open the door before helping him over to the couch and gently easing him back onto it. “The doctor said for you to take it easy.”

“Yeah. Take it easy, not have The Hair and Dusty Bun carry me around everywhere like I’m some damn invalid,” he huffed, glaring at the two guys standing in front of him. “My wounds are all healed. Yeah, I’m a little slow still but I can walk around on my own.”

“Maybe, but…look, you saved our asses down there,” Steve explained. “You saved my ass. You’ve been so hard on yourself for running after Chrissy but anyone would have done the same thing in your situation. And there was nothing you could have done for her. But when it came time, you stepped up. You’re a goddamn hero, man. You risked your life to help the rest of us without a second thought.”

Eddie swallowed hard before his eyes met Steve’s, “Thanks man, but I didn’t do anything the rest of you wouldn’t have done.”

“Maybe, but you still did it. You told me when you see danger you turn heel and run but that’s not what you did. Yeah, you ran. You ran right into the danger.”

“It’s not that big of a deal, seriously. I didn’t do anything really except be a midnight snack for a bunch of bloodsuckers,” muttered Eddie, rubbing his forehead with his fingers. You could see how tired he was just from the ordeal of getting discharged and home and Dustin picked up on it as well. 

“Alright, how about we go?” Dustin offered, giving Steve a look to let him know it was time to let Eddie relax. “You enjoy getting to be home and get some rest. We’ll check in tomorrow, okay?”

“Yeah, man, fine.”

You walked Dustin and Steve to the door, thanking them both for all their help. Eddie’s room had been filled with a constant procession of friends coming and going. Uncle Wayne had spent every minute off work sitting with you by Eddie’s side, so relieved to see his nephew with his eyes open, to hear the doctors say he was going to come through okay. 

Closing the door behind them, you made your back to Eddie, sitting on the couch next to him, curling your legs up under you. You propped your arm on the back of the couch, staring at him, something you found yourself doing a lot these past few weeks. It was like your eyes had to verify that he was really there, he was really okay, and this wasn’t all some fever dream you'd concocted out of desperation. 

 “Sweetheart, why are you staring at me?” Eddie asked, his head tilted back, eyes closed, yet still somehow knowing. 

“I just…I need to…I don’t know…I’m sorry…” you whispered, squeezing your eyes shut, willing the tears to stay away. You’d done so well keeping them under control these last few weeks but now they were threatening to pour from you as everything hit you all at once.

“Whoa,” Eddie said, lifting his head to look at you in concern. “What is it, princess? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. I’m sorry. I’m being stupid.” You stood up, needing to do something to keep you busy so you wouldn’t fall apart in front of him. “Are you hungry? Thirsty? I can make you a sandwich or some eggs or…”

“Hey.” He reached for your hand, pulling you down into his lap. Those large hands cupped your face, bare of rings as they had to be removed at the hospital. “I’m good, okay? You’re not being stupid. You’re the smartest person I know…well, besides maybe Henderson but he makes all of us look like morons. Tell me why you’re so upset.”

“I thought I lost you,” you choked out. “El saw you. Vecna showed her and she told me you were gone. I spent two days thinking you were gone. It was…” You shook your head, closing your eyes. 

Eddie pulled you into his chest, his arms coming around you tightly and you melted against him, needing the comfort that only his body could provide. Your own arms wound around him, crushing your bodies together, unable to get close enough and then you felt it. His body shaking beneath you as sobs took him over. The two of you sat like that, holding each other, crying, releasing all the fear and pain together. 

“I thought I was gone too,” he admitted. “Jesus Christ. Your face…” Pulling back, he took your face in his hands again. “This face was the last thing I thought about before everything went dark. All I could think was that I was never going to see this beautiful face again. I was never going to kiss those lips again. I wasn’t going to get to spend the rest of my life with you and I wasn’t going to keep my promise. I…baby, I am so sorry. I wanted to keep my promise.”

“And you did,” you told him, “you’re here. You came back to me. I just…I don’t know how I would survive without you. It was like this black hole of nothingness when I thought. I just couldn’t…I…” 

Then you were pressing kisses all over his face, kisses that were full of need and love and reassurance. Reassurance that he was here, that you were together, that everything was going to be okay. 

“You’re still mine,” you said softly, pressing your lips to his. “You’re always mine.”

“Always,” Eddie agreed, his lips meeting yours with the same intense need but then he let out a yelp of pain and you darted off of him. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m okay…damn…” He held his side gently, grimacing.

“Shit, I am so sorry.”

“No, don’t be sorry. I want you, princess. I want you so bad but I don’t think I’m up for it yet.”

“That’s okay.” You climbed back onto the couch, next to him, gently easing his head down against your chest. “We don’t have to rush anything. I am just happy to have you home with me. I am just happy to have you here.”

“Hey, if it means I get to spend the next few days right here, with my face pressed against your boobs, I am more than happy.”

You snorted, rolling your eyes, “Leave it to you to ruin the sweet moment.”

___________________________________________________________

“This was the perfect idea,” Robin exclaimed, holding her arms out to her side as she spun in the sand. “I needed this. Sun, sand, ocean…we all deserve this after all the shit we’ve dealt with this past couple of years.”

“I agree,” Steve added. “We have more than earned a relaxing vacation and some fun in the sun.”

You closed your eyes, soaking in the warmth of the sun as it enveloped your body like a warm hug. All of you had decided that you needed a break from the trauma and the horror that had become your life. Argyle had recommended that you all head out to California to visit him for a week or two and you’d jumped at the chance. Between Eddie’s van and Steve’s car, you had all made it and standing here, staring out at the ocean, at all the people you loved laughing and splashing and having fun, you didn’t think there could be a more perfect moment than this. 

“Hey there beautiful.” Two arms slid around your waist from behind and you melted against him, so very grateful for the ability to do so, remembering how close you’d come to losing the chance to ever be in his arms again. Eddie’s lips grazed your jaw before he propped his chin on your shoulder. 

“Are you heading into the ocean?” you asked, laughing as you watched Dustin, Mike, Lucas, and Will playing a game of chicken in the waves. 

“Me? Nope. Absolutely not.”

You spun in his arms, lopping yours around his neck. You knew exactly why he was so against going in the water as he stood there, in the warm California sun, in jeans and his three quarter sleeve Hellfire tee. Eddie had been self conscious ever since the attack. His torso, arms, neck, and legs were covered in scars, a road map to the battle he’d won. 

The first time you tried to be intimate, he hesitated, which was so unlike Eddie who jumped at any opportunity to get you naked. You’d worried that his feelings for you had changed in some way with everything the two of you had been through. He had the all clear from the doctor, he was feeling way better, and you couldn’t understand why he wasn’t jumping at the chance for sex. It was so out of character for your horndog boyfriend. You’d quickly pulled your shirt over your head, embarrassed and mortified that he was turning you down. 

Things were awkward for a couple weeks after that. He hesitated to touch you. He tensed up whenever you touched him. Finally, you exploded, screaming that if he wanted to break up with you then he needed to just say it because you couldn’t keep walking around just waiting for him to shatter you into pieces. 

Eddie had been shocked and immediately began backpedaling and apologizing, assuring you that was the last thing he wanted. It took a lot of urging and demanding on your part, but he finally told you that he was scared for you to see him because he looked like a monster now. He shattered your heart anyway with his words but for an entirely different reason. You couldn’t believe that he would think your love for him was so shallow that something like scars would matter to you and you told him so. You told him those scars were badges of courage and he should never be ashamed of them. Eddie had gotten past it with you, but he still didn’t like anyone else to see and you decided this perfect day on the beach was not the time to push it. 

“Okay,” you replied, pressing your lips to his, “then what would you like to do?”

“I know exactly what I would like to do.”

“Oh yeah?” you asked, assuming you knew where this was going. 

“Yeah.” He cleared his throat and his tongue darted out, running back and forth across the corner of his mouth. 

“Eddie, are you okay?” you asked and then your eyes went wide as you realized that all of your friends had gathered around you in a circle. “Okay. What the hell is going on?”

“Princess, you asked me not too long ago if I wanted to end things with you,” Eddie began and your heart stuttered in your chest, wondering where this was going. He wouldn’t possibly break up with you in front of everybody, would he? “I told you that was the last thing I wanted and it’s true. I don’t…Jesus, I can’t ever be without you. You are absolutely everything to me. I almost lost you because of…well, you know. Anyway, I don’t ever want to lose you. I don’t ever want to be without you. I,uhh…fuck. I’m so bad at this shit.” He reached into his pocket, pulling out a silver ring with a small green gemstone in the center and your eyebrows creased in confusion until he dropped to the sand on one knee. 

“Oh shit…oh god…” you mumbled, staring at him in disbelief. 

“Sweetheart, I love you so much. Like, I love you more than I have ever loved anything. I might love you more than anyone has ever loved anything. I know we’re young but I know I want you, forever. Will you marry me?”

Your breath caught in your throat as you stared down into his hopeful eyes, gazing up at yours. Your friend stood silent, still as statues as they waited for your answer. Tears filled your eyes and all you could do was nod, incapable of speaking. 

“Yes?” asked Eddie hesitantly.

“Yes!” you shrieked, lunging and knocking him back onto the sand. Falling on top of him, you peppered his face with kisses and he laughed. “Yes! I love you so much. I want you forever. Yes I’ll marry you.”

All your friends cheered, Dustin the loudest of them all, screaming and jumping in the sand. But you couldn’t hear any of it because all you were focused on was the feel of Eddie’s lips on yours and the knowledge that he was going to be yours forever.

____________________________________________________________

“My future wife,” Eddie murmured against your skin, lips trailing over your stomach, his fingers moving your shirt higher and higher. “My bride.” Hot, wet kisses across your breasts, his tongue leaving a blazing wet trail over your nipples as he flicked his tongue over them before pulling them between his lips, one and then the other. “Mrs. Munson…shit, I could get used to that.”

“Mmm, me too,” you purred, lost in the feel of his lips exploring every inch of skin as his fingers exposed it. Now he was moving over your shoulder, down your arm, over your hip, hands pulling your panties down as those lips moved along your pubic bone. 

“Mine,” he growled, his tongue licking a strip from your entrance up to your clit. “Forever mine now.”

“Always yours,” you gasped, fingers tangling in his waves, pressing yourself against him. His tongue teased your entrance, his nose running over your clit, the combined sensation had you writhing, rolling yourself into him. “Only yours…”

“That’s right,” he rumbled, his tongue running over the length of you before pulling your clit between his lips. “Fuck princess. I am the luckiest bastard in the world.”

You felt like you were the luckiest person in the world as he pressed his middle finger into you, curling, searching, until it found exactly what it was looking for, causing you to cry his name as your hips bucked up off the bed. Eddie’s other hand pressed against your stomach, holding you down on the bed as his tongue rolled around your clit. He added another finger and you moaned, pressing your hips down against his hand as you raced quickly toward release. 

“Eddie, don’t stop. Oh Jesus, baby, yes…right there,” you managed, gasping between each word, your body completely outside of your control as his fingers and tongue worked you expertly. 

He groaned in appreciation, the vibrations sending you over the edge. Your body trembled but he never let up, working you through the waves of pleasure that sent you helplessly out to sea, shaking, eyes rolling back, helpless whimpers falling from your lips. 

Eddie kissed his way back up your body, eyes holding yours as he grabbed a condom, sliding it over his length. He guided himself to your entrance with one hand, the other cradling the back of your neck. He pushed into you slowly until he bottomed out within you as he pressed his lips to yours and you squeaked in pleasure at the feel of your bodies joining together. 

“I love you so goddamn much,” he whispered, pressing his forehead against yours, his body still, just relishing the feel of being completely surrounded by you. “I can’t wait to start my life with you.”

“Me too,” you sighed, eyes rolling back as he slowly began to rock his hips, pulling out until just the tip of him remained and then pressing back into you in long, slow thrusts. “I love you more than I’ve ever loved anything in my life.”

Eddie’s arms came around you, cradling you to him as your bodies moved together. You rocked your hips forward as he did, meeting his thrusts each time, until you both couldn’t take the slow pace anymore. He buried his face against your neck as he plunged into you more frantically, the bed rocking along with the two of you. 

“Fuck sweetheart, I’m close,” he growled against your ear. 

“Come for me baby,” you urged, hands gripping his ass, rocking against him with an urgent need. 

“Oh shit!” he cried out, bucking against you and then stilling as he reached his own climax. His body shuddered above you, pitiful moans rumbling out of him, and you wrapped your arms around him, holding him to you until it subsided. “Jesus…” he muttered, slowly pulling from you, removing the condom and tossing it in the trash can before collapsing next to you, resting his head on your chest.

“I can’t believe we get to do that for the rest of our lives,” you sighed happily, your hand running gently over his hair. 

“Every damn day,” he stated, nipping playfully at your shoulder. “Even when we’re old. I am making you mine every single day for the rest of our forever.”

“Sounds like bliss. So…” Eddie stilled, looking up at you, his eyebrows raised curiously. “I know you proposed and everything but did you plan on us having a long engagement? I mean, we are young so I would understand.”

“Shit, no,” he laughed, propping himself on his elbow, trailing the back of his hand down between your breasts and along your stomach. “I want to marry you as soon as possible but I know it will probably take you a while to plan a big wedding.”

“Big?” you asked, shaking your head. “No. I don’t need anything big. I just want to marry you. I don’t want to go into debt to do it. I would marry you in a damn shack.”

“While I appreciate the sentiment, princess, I am not marrying you in a shack.”

“Okay. What about the beach?” “You mean the lake at home?” he asked, wrinkling his nose. 

“No…” you said slowly. “What about the beach here in California?”

“You want to come back here?”

“No. I was thinking…what if we got married on this trip?”

Eddie’s brow furrowed further, “Isn’t that kind of fast? I mean, don’t 

you need a dress and flowers and shit?”

“No. All I need is you. I mean, all our friends are here with us. We’re on a beach in California. Can you think of a more perfect place?”

“No. I guess not. But princess, what about when we get home? I don’t even have a job. Hawkins gave me a diploma just to cover their own asses after the whole town accused me of a murder I didn’t commit. I mean…”

You took his face in your hands, “We’ll figure all of that out. None of that matters. The rest will fall into place. All we need is us.”

“Are you sure?” he asked.

“Eddie, I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life but if you’re not, then we can wait a while.”

“Sweetheart, I would marry you this very second if that’s what you want,” Eddie replied, his hands taking yours, thumbs running over the backs. “When I think about the future, the only thing I am sure about is that I want you in it.”

“Me too. So, let’s do this and then figure out the rest of it together.”

He smiled, his lips finding yours in a sweet, gentle kiss, “Alright. Let’s do this. Let’s get married.”

“I can’t wait to make you mine.”

“Darling, I’m already yours,” he grinned, pulling you down to the bed again in a kiss that held all the promise of tomorrow and every day after that. 

#eddie munson #eddie munson smut #stranger things eddie #eddie the banished #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x reader #smut requests #request #eddie munson x you

[sstvrnioloo]

stone cold - c.s pt.2 of "i'll beat her bitch ass."

pt1

ೃ༄

femvolleyballplayer!y/n x comforting!chris

warnings: cursing, crying, intentional lowercase, no grammar used (intentional), detailed brutal fighting, mentions of death, ig triggering topic, use of y/n (sorry?) ig angst???

summary: somerville won the semi-finals and amelia's team goes home. amelia should wish that she hadn't said that because y/n doesnt play when it comes to someone talking about her boyfriend. shits about to go down.

this is set in some random ass au that i can’t really explain😭

p.s sorry to people named amelia, no hate to y’all !💗

also be kind to others please !!

don’t like don’t read !!

find some other shit to do.

not proofread (a bitch don’t got no time for that shit)

this is my creative work and i do not approve of plagiarism in any way. i also do not approve of reposting my work onto other apps or anything of the idea. SSTVRNIOLOO 2024.

a/n: HEYY , so this is your surprise fic series ive been working onnnn ~ also my laptop stopped working so i don’t have the option of typing anymore, so it’ll be on my phone or ipad. (mostly ipad though) 💔

wc: 2k

enjoy !!

ೃ༄

im going to beat this motherfucker up.

how dare she slap me, tell chris is only dating me because im just a "good fuck", and saying didnt love me.

im going to beat her so bad that her nose is so fucking crooked. so bad that she cant speak. that shes hospitalized just as long that i was when she injured me.

after she slapped me i pounced on her. yanking at her hair & jaw to get her to look at me.

"whos laughing now, bitch?"

laughing, i bitch slap her right back and punch her in the nose. nobody even dares to fucking touch me. no one.

i jump on her pounding her head onto the glossy gym floors. throwing many punches at her nose and face, practically drilling my knuckles into her faceーwith. no. absolute. mercy.

i didnt care how bad her injuries were gonna be. i could actually care less.

my white jerseyーwell, previouslyーwas now splattered with her blood.

"yeah get her ass !!"

meghan yelled from the bench. i love meg.

nobody was really going to stop me. i probably looked like a monster.

"please stop!! im sorry !"

amelia yelped and screamed. i heard herーloud and clearーbut didn't give no fucks.

throwing punches directly at her nose, hoping to complete my goal of making her; already hideous nose; crooked as hell.

her face drowned of ruby red coloured blood. her mouth draining of blood and face bruised and cut.

i could practically kill her. but do i want murder charges though? no.

i looked at her twisted nose in proudness & enjoyment. he nose was perfectly crooked how i wanted it to be.

all this timeーwith out realizing itーi'd also been fighting off the refs and amelia's teamates. i was also tuning out the repeatedly blown whistle.

well too late. the damage was done. she was definitely fucked up.

its called payback, bitch.

ೃ༄

she surprisingly got up, stumbling around before she threw a hand at me. she punched my nose and scratched my cheek.

i felt the burning sensation on my cheek and my blood sprinting down my cheek.

“you motherfucker!”

she furiously yelled at me, with tears running down her face, mixing in with the blood.

my eyes shot down to the gym floor. it was one big puddle of blood. i grinned crazilyーlike a fucking serial killer.

we were both standing in fighting positions, ready to quite literally kill each other.

i caught chris’ big blue orbs staring at me. he was also grinning. he knew the rivalry that me and amelia have; that’s why he never stopped me.

the crowd was chanting my name. they all backed me up on this rivalry comepletely.

our faces were both decorated with blood. but mine didn’t have tears streaming down them.

i knew i was going to penalized for the tournament. i most definitely was; without question.

this beef wasn’t with any of our other teammates, it was only between me and her. though everybody knew what amelia did to me last season.

the referees and her teammates finally pulled us away from each other. both screaming profanities at eachother.

but suddenly whilst she was walking back to her bench. she fell. its all because i knocked her outー

stone cold.

ೃ༄

as my coach walked me to the locker room, i heard cheering, applause and more loud chanting of my name. they all knew the beef between amelia and i.

i got to the locker room with my coach and sat down.

“you’re expecting me to yell at you or something, hm?”

my coach monique said.

“yep.”

“well i’m not. i’m so proud of you for beating that bitch up.”

coach monique laughed.

“thank you! i thought everybody thought i was a monster for doing that”

“you’re a monster on the court. but thatーthat was just handing pure business.”

“thank you coach”

coach monique walked back out the the court to settle my team and talk to the refs.

suddenly, chris walked in to the locker room.

“oh hey chris”

“hey baby”

he went in to hug me but i gestured no.

“unless you want blood on your shirt, i don’t think you should.”

“i don’t really care”

he hugged me tightly and i hugged right back.

“so how’d the fight even start y/n?” chris questioned

“well first she slapped me because i was supposedly “cheating” then told me that you were only dating me because i was a “good fuck” and you didn’t love me”

i explained calmly.

“that little bitch.” chris said low-toned.

“and that’s exactly why her nose is crooked as fuck”

i grinned, remembering how her nose looked.

“i’m gonna go back to the stands and get to car.” chris said.

“okay see you in a bit baby”

he gave me a swift kiss on the lips and walked out the locker room.

i grabbed a wet towel and dabbed at my cuts and bruisesーa burning sensation each time i dabbed at them.

changing back into my clothes and taking my sports bag. i head to the car and greet my friends.

i hated the media. and now they were following me.

i stepped out the door and walked to car where all my friends were. i ran up to nick first.

“hey babes!” nick said excitedly.

“hey nickk” matching his same energy.

group hugging lauren and angelina (angie) happily while getting tons of dumb questions from the media that was previously following me.

also greeting matt aswell, making sure to make him smile.

ೃ༄

parking into the driveway, me, matt, chris, and nick got out the car and heading inside the house.

nick and matt went to their rooms, leaving me and chris to go to our shared one.

“i need a shower” i said.

“okay baby i’ll go after you” chris said.

..

i closed the bathroom door and started stripping my clothes off. once fully done, i stepped inside the shower, turning the water on and letting the water stream down.

the water mixed in with the little blood that was left on me. falling on the shower tiles.

i took my loofah and put soap on it and watched it grow soap suds on it. i got lost in relaxing feeling of hot water and sudsy soap. it just rejuvenated me.

..

hopping out the shower, and drying myself with my towel. i threw on my clothes that were laid out on the counter. i opened the bathroom door and felt the cold air rush past me.

i stretched out on the shared bed and get a call.

it’s from my aunt. she never calls me. why now?

“hey y/n it’s me”

my aunt sounded like she was crying. but why?

“yes auntie?”

“y/n y-you’re parents died.”

i dropped my phone on the bed.

no. this is some kind of sick joke.

my eyes darted everywhere, trying to register what i just heard.

they couldn't have died. i saw them last night when they flew to London.

when they disappointed me telling me they couldn't make it to my game. i had totally forgot about that when i looked around in the stands.

then, i broke out into a loud, ugly, sob.

chris’ eyes immediately shot to me.

“what happened y/n??” his voice laced with worry and concern.

"my parents- they-" i couldn't finish my sentence.

"take your time ma" chris said gently.

i could hardly believe my parents died. it just wasn't possible.

chris hugged me tightly and kissed my forehead, trying to get me to calm down.

i sobbed. i loved my parents so much. sure we weren't on the best terms with eachother lately. but i still loved them dearly.

and the worst part is, the last thing i ever said to them but "i hate you both"

"chris the last thing i said to them wasn't even i love you!" i wailed, still sobbing.

"shh y/n" chris calmed.

then chris just held me there. no words. no sound. nothing.

just silence.

he knew what had happened by the hints i dropped.

i just couldn't bring myself to say it. not yet.

ೃ༄

i awoke, wrapped in chris' arms. i looked over the time,

1:56pm

a solid 13 hours of sleep.

yet i still felt tired.

i had no energy. so many missed calls and texts.

i knew what they were all gonna say,

"We're so sorry for your lost! If there's anything we can do to help let us know."

well you most certainly cant fix those empty parental figures;

hell, i'm an orphan now.

so bullshit.

i opened tiktok bored out of my mind and started scrolling.

i saw a tiktok of a girl who looked around my age with both her mom and dad , doing a dance.

why cant that be me?

..

i was at my desk a couple minutes later, hatching a plan.

because what if my parents really weren't dead,

what they faked it?

well its time to find out.

chris woke up groggily,

"morning ma" he yawned.

"morning baby" i answered swiftly.

"what are you doing?" he asked.

"we're flying to london."

extra: soooooooooo this took so long for no reason but here it isssss.

school was beating my ass fr fr

but thank you for reading !!!

taglist: 🏷 @lovingmattysposts @elliesturniolo1 @elliewrites1 @sturnsbitch @luvmxtt @vanteguccir @chrisstopherfilmed @novasturniolo03 @tyjna6 @sturnlova @sturniolo-lover1317 @patscorner @ak47b1tch

(comment here to be on my taglist !)

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matthew sturniolo x reader #christopher owen sturniolo #nicolas antonio sturniolo #matthew bernard sturniolo #fight #chris sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo smut #matt x reader #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo x reader #chris x reader #volleyball #volleyball fight #stvrnioloo #ೃ༄ #riri yaps too much ! ೃ༄

[daddyy333]

It’s not okay | Joseph Quinn x y/n

if you’d like you can reblog my original work, but please don’t post it without credit. if you take inspiration from my ideas please tag me, I’d like to see how someone else would write it

word count: 0.9k

warnings: implies abusive experiences in the past, ?

summary: you flinch during an argument and it worries the shit out of Joseph

“I am not comfortable with you hanging out with her so much, you’re always with her! You skipped date night two weeks in a row for her!” You said, referring to Grace. You’d been missing Joe so badly for months, you thought since filming ended you’d get your boyfriend back but he was still always ou of the house, hanging out with the other cast members, especially Grace.

You didn’t dislike Grace. She was a nice girl, and she was gorgeous and you’d seen her acting which was phenomenal. You just hated that she was getting all your boyfriend's attention. At this rate, he’ll probably forget about your anniversary coming up in 3 weeks.

“You’re being a little overdramatic, babe! We’re just friends, why can’t you understand that?!” He yelled back. You groaned, turning around and consequently being right in his face.

“I get that you’re just friends but you spend all your time with her now! I want my boyfriend back, Joe, you’ve been so busy these last 2 years. I fucking miss you!” You said. Joe went to brush your hair out of your face and then cup your cheek but you gasped and flinched away from his touch.

You didn’t mean to, you didn’t even realize you were so anxious but all the yelling back and forth must’ve gotten you all worked up. His eyes widened and he looked so scared.

“Wha- w-why did you flinch?” He said and you rolled your eyes. You sighed and said “I don’t know, Joe, it was just a reaction, okay? I didn’t mean to” “A-Am I- do I hurt you? D-Do I scare you?” He asked, looking down at his hands.

You took a deep breath and said “no, Joseph. Whatever, just keep hanging out with Grace and I’ll see you tomorrow morning. Dinners done just let it cool down for a few minutes”

You groaned and went to the bedroom, not exactly slamming the door but certainly using to express your anger towards him. You took a shower and just went to bed, you didn’t want to see him right now and since everything was Grace Grace Grace that wouldn’t be a problem for him.

Except, it was. He was frozen. 10 minutes he stood there, a few tears rolling down his cheeks. Why did you flinch? Did you think he was going to hit you? Does he hit you? No, he doesn’t remember it. Maybe he blacks out when he does.

It scared the hell out of him. Why would you feel the need to flinch when he reached to touch your face? He doesn’t remember hitting you, but you flinched.

He tried to eat dinner but ended up putting most of it away for leftovers anyways. He almost didn’t want to see you the next morning, he felt like some kind of monster.

That only made you more upset. 3 days passed before you had a proper moment together and you weren’t gonna give it up. “God damn it, stop avoiding me! Why can’t you just listen to me?” You said as he left the kitchen just as you came in for the 10th time since your fight.

He sighed softly and said “I’m not avoiding you” “you won’t even stay in the same room with me! What, did you sleep with her or something?” You asked and scoffed. He bit his lip, looking down nervously. He took a deep breath and said “y-…you flinched. The other day, when I went to brush your hair out of your face while we were arguing. I was actually going to cup your cheeks and apologize but I just…y-you flinched,”

“Joseph, I’m fine. It was just heat of the moment, okay?” You said and rolled your eyes. You grabbed a bottle of wine and poured yourself a glass, sipping the entire thing down and pouring yourself another.

“No, it’s not fine. No other woman I’ve been with has ever flinched during an argument. D-…do I hit you and like…not remember it? D-Do I scare you?” He asked and you sighed. You turned to him and said “growing up…disobeying or arguing with my father usually ended up far worse than some yelling and avoiding each other for a few days. If I could help it, Joe, I wouldn’t flinch. But I can’t. No matter how much I trust you, I’ll never not flinch. It’s not you, Joseph, I swear”

“Oh god…oh, sweetheart…” he said and you took a deep, shaky breath. You turned around and took another sip of wine, trying not to think about it too much. He hugged you from behind and said “I- god, I’m so sorry…I didn’t know, I shouldn’t have pressured you to tell me, god I’m so self-centered”

“N-No, Joe. You have every right t-to be concerned, I just…it feels stupid. A-And I hate that it still affects me. You don’t deserve to worry if I scare you, you’re an incredible boyfriend, really” you said and he sighed. He kissed your head and said “not as of late” “I just need to learn to share you, that’s all. I’m sorry” you said and he took a deep breath.

He caressed your waist and said “I’m sorry too. For everything, really. I wish you hadn’t gone through that, love” “it’s fine…I’m fine” you said and he shook his head. He kissed your cheek and said “it’s not okay, my love. But now that I know, I will be more careful in the future. N-Not that I want us to argue I just mean that-”

“I know, Joey. Thank you…for understanding” you said. He chuckled nervously and said “of course, sweetheart. I love you” “I love you too” you said and smiled.

Taglist: @kellysimagines @readsalot73 @hellfire1986baby

As of now l'm writing for

Eddie Munson

Joseph Quinn

Jamie Bower

Steve Harrington

Robin Buckley

Maya Hawke

Lo’ak

Neteyam

So just comment the taglist you want to be added to and l'll add you :)

#stranger things #joseph quinn #joe quinn #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn fanfiction #joseph quinn oneshot #joseph quinn x y/n

[ja-reau]

You write angst so well so I thought I’d send a request.

Could you write a Larissa x normie!reader where they’re in a relationship and Larissa, being a workaholic, has missed so many dates and they get into an intense fight about it, then in the middle, Larissa says something hurtful that makes them both stop and reader just leaves in defeat. Larissa regrets it so she takes a break from work and tries to make it up to reader.

Thanks!

Hurtful Words - Larissa Weems x Reader

Word Count: 655

Warnings: fighting

“Larissa!” you called out, pushing the door to your girlfriend’s office and closing it behind you. You had been in a great mood. Work had been significantly easy today. You had no rude clients, your boss wasn’t being a pain. And on top of that, you got to leave work earlier than usual. Which meant you had more time with Larissa! The smile on your face only faltered slightly when Larissa didn’t reply. “Rissa?” You called again, your smile still on your face. “What, y/n? What is it? Can’t you see I’m working?” Larissa asked, frustration evident in her tone.

Your smile flattered slightly. “I’m-“ you started but she instantly cut you off. “Sorry? You’re sorry?” She asked; laughing slightly. “You don’t get it, y/n. I love you, I do. But you have to stop coming in here and bothering me. I’m running a school. You don’t understand how hard my job is.” Larissa said. This wasn’t like her. This wasn’t your sweet Larissa. This wasn’t the Larissa you knew and loved. This was someone else. “I understand your job is hard, so is mine. But I don’t take my frustration out on you.” You spoke, the smile that one adorned your face was now gone completely.

“Oh please, y/n. All you do is work at a store in Jericho. That’s not as hard as running an entire school.” She shot back, and you felt stabbed in your chest. “You’re being mean.” You said to Larissa. “Mean? No, I’m being honest. You come in here almost every day and disrupt me.” she said, turning to face you better. “Y/n, I’m sick of it. All you fucking do is disrupt me. When I’m working, when I’m at home. All the goddamn time, y/n!” she said.

You never felt so small before. You coward back, moving towards the door. “I’m sorry.” you repeated, tears started to well around your eyes. “I’ll see you at home.” you whispered softly. As you backed away from Larissa, she felt sudden regret. Seeing you back away from her like she was some form of a monster, broke her heart. She didn’t mean it. She shouldn’t have said what she said. “Y/n wait-” she started, but you never let her finish.

“No. You made it clear that all I am is a bother to you.” You said, wiping away your tears before leaving, slamming the door behind you.

Larissa sat on her chair, her face in her hands. She fucked up. She knew she did. Seeing the look on your face when she yelled at you was just heartbreaking. “Fuck, what the hell did I do?” she muttered to herself.

—

Later that night, you had been curled up in bed, the tv on with some reruns of your favourite show on the background. You had changed and laid down in bed since the moment you arrived home. You heard the front door open and the familiar click of her heels and knew that Larissa was home. Your interest in her presence peaked when you started to smell your favourite food coming from the living room. “Darling?” Larissa called as she entered the room.

Despite not wanting to turn around, you did. You couldn’t help the small smile on your face when you saw Larissa, and the roses she had. “For you.” she said as she watched you move to sit up. “I’m still mad.” You said softly, even though you took the flowers.

“I know. And I’m so sorry sweetheart. I shouldn’t have thrown my frustrations towards you, especially since it wasn’t even directed at you.” She said, moving to pull you into her arms and you let her. “I brought your favourite food..” she said “and wine.” She added. You couldn’t help but smile at this. “All is forgiven then. Let’s go eat.” You said, taking her hand and leading her out of the room.

Tags:

@sapphicsbeloved

@lesbianbookworm15

@rwoolfe

#larissa weems angst #larissa weems one shot #larissa weems x reader #wednesday fanfic

[ladykailitha]

In the Midnight Hour Part 4

We get more of the party as plan is starting to form.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

*

Eddie landed on the roof and tapped on the window. The window immediately opened and he leapt back in surprise.

“Holy shit!” he cried. “You’ve never been waiting for me before.”

Steve chuckled. “Jokes on you. I’m always waiting. I just usually am in bed when I do. “

Eddie cocked his head. “You wait for me?”

“I can set my watch to you showing up, you know?” Steve teased. “At exactly midnight, like clock work.”

Eddie blinked. “You know...I don’t think I realized that I was that punctual. Mrs Click would have been impressed. Was always late to her class.”

Steve shook his head. “I don’t think anyone liked her class, not even the history nerds.”

“You a history nerd, Harrington?” Eddie asked as he sat down on the roof gripping his ankles.

“No,” Steve said as he crawled out of his window to sit next to him. “The dates made my head swim. Though that could have been the concussion.”

“Just how many concussions have you had?” Eddie barked.

Steve cocked his head to the side. “Is that your first question tonight?” he asked with a wink.

Eddie laughed. “Sure, pretty boy, if that how you wanna play it. That’s my first question.”

“Um...if I’m counting them right, three,” Steve said after a moment.

“Three in three years?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s not good,” Eddie said softly. “Do you know that too many of them can kill you? Like even if it’s a little bump, having too many concussions will make your brain so soft a little bump could kill you. And you’re out there fighting monsters, protecting those kids and for what? You don’t owe them a god damn thing, Steve. Jesus Christ!”

Steve looked down at his hands. “Did I tell you the first time I faced a monster I ran?”

Eddie’s mouth went dry. “Nope. No way. I’ve seen you in action, dude. There is no way you ran.”

He shrugged. “You can ask Nancy and Jonathan if you want. They’ll tell you how I turned tail and ran.”

“Wait...” Eddie said slowly. “I do know this story. Nancy was telling it Robin. You came back. You listened to their screams of terror and came back.”

Steve looked up at him with a small smile. “Yeah, I did. Jonathan had to drag me and Nancy out so we could all run together. But this is what I meant when I told you give yourself some credit. Fight or Flight. You couldn’t fight it. So you ran. It’s okay to run. As long as you come back when you need to.”

Eddie closed his eyes.

“And you did, Eddie,” Steve said softly. “You fought for Dustin who you wanted to protect.”

“I did, didn’t I?” Eddie said with a smile.

Steve bumped their shoulders together. “My turn. Why was Chrissy Cunningham in your trailer that night?”

“Fuck, man,” Eddie said. “Veto.”

Steve winced. “Sorry.”

Eddie sighed. “I just don’t want to get you into trouble. It wasn’t strictly legal. But she was so scared, man. Pure terror in her eyes.”

Steve nodded. “I think Vecna had been haunting her for a while. Like what he did with Max and Nancy.”

Eddie’s head snapped up. “What?”

“You didn’t know?” Steve asked with a frown. “All the victims had Vecna in their head.”

Eddie thought for a minute. “Holy shit, that makes more sense.” He looked at Steve. “Is that what you think, that I’m a Vecna specter living inside your head?”

“You are my greatest failure, man,” Steve said quietly. “It would make sense.”

Eddie frowned. “You told me not be a hero, and I did it anyway. I thought you said that you were pragmatist. What happened to that?”

Steve sighed heavily. “It’s Dustin. He blames me for your death. He’s changed so much in his grief and there is nothing anyone can say or do to pull him out of it.”

“Shit.” Eddie had been so caught up in the thrill of teasing Steve that he forgot that there were other people that would miss him.

“You should go visit him,” Steve murmured. “Or your Uncle Wayne.”

Eddie let out a low whine. “I can’t. You know why I can’t.” He tapped to the side of his head.

Steve let out a low gasp. “Shit, man. I got so wrapped up in everything that I forgot I don’t live in a world that you aren’t some bastard’s plaything.” He ran his hands over his face. “That was cruel of me to suggest it.”

Eddie nodded. “I wish I wasn’t. But even I know if Veckie decides to the plug, I’m back to being dead.”

Steve nodded back. He ran a finger over the scar on Eddie’s chin. “I wish I could have saved you.”

Suddenly Eddie was clutching his head.

“Eddie!” Steve called. He reached out to touch him but Eddie shrank away.

“It’s‒ah!” Eddie screamed. “It’s Vecna. He’s angry. Oh god, it hurts!”

Steve was on his knees. He didn’t dare touch Eddie, but he hovered close. “What hurts?”

Eddie just screamed and then suddenly he was being yanked into the air, his feet kicking as he was pulled back to the Upside Down.

Steve stared at the no vacant spot where Eddie once was in shock. He had touched Eddie before. But this time it hurt him. What had changed?

*

Steve didn’t sleep at all that night, tossing and turning. The guilt of having hurt Eddie, eating away his insides. He knew that there was only one person he could talk to about this.

He showered and dressed. On his way he stopped by and grabbed donuts. He pulled into the parking lot and fought to control his breathing. He pounded his fists on the steering wheel and he squeezed his eyes shut.

It was the right choice. It had to have been. Because there wasn’t another. He got out the car and grabbed the donuts.

“You can do this,” he said to himself, talking himself up.

Steve looked up at the hospital, lips quivering, hands shaking as he gripped the box. He took one step. And then another. Soon he was at reception asking for her room number because he knew she had been moved since the last time he was here.

He walked into the room to see Max sitting up and chatting with someone just behind the door. He took another step and immediately tried to back out.

“Oh shit,” he said. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know anyone else was here.” He stepped back, but realized he still had the donut box in his hand. “Oh here. I mean. You can have these. I’ll come back later.”

“You take one step out this room, Steve Harrington,” Max growled from her bed, “and I will hunt you down.”

Steve looked down at the floor. “I think that’s up to Dustin, if he wants me here.”

Suddenly he had an arm full of Dustin Henderson and they were both crying.

“I didn’t mean it,” Dustin cried. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Steve just tucked the boy under his chin and held tight.

Max huffed. “It’s about time, morons.”

They finally stepped away from each other.

“I’m sorry, too,” Steve said. “I should have left someone else with you so he didn’t feel the need to protect you.” I should have stayed.

“He was so brave,” Dustin whimpered.

“I‒I might have some news on that front,” Steve said. “It’s why I’m here bribing Max with donuts.”

Both Max and Dustin’s eyebrows shot up.

“About Eddie?” Max asked.

“Sorta,” Steve said. “But that’s the wrong order. Let me tell it from the beginning.”

And so he did. He talked about the nightmares at first. The constant terror and ghosts from his past. Everyone he couldn’t save. Barb. Billy. And finally Eddie.

And then about a couple months back, Eddie started showing up at his house at midnight. Every night. He was and wasn’t Eddie. He had the same smile, the same humor, but he was wrong. Fangs, wings and claws. His wounds sealed, but not healed. As if one touch and the wound would open, spilling his life’s blood once again.

How Steve thought that these were just more nightmares. But found out a couple of days ago that he might be more real than he thought. How scared he was for Eddie. How Vecna was living in his head. And that’s why he needed to talk to Max.

“Because Vecna had been living in my head, too,” she said softly.

Steve nodded. They had long since polished off the donuts and Steve was sitting on the edge of her bed, Dustin back in his chair next to them.

Dustin let out a sigh of relief. “Thank god he went to you and not anyone else.”

Steve frowned. “Why’s that?”

“Anyone else would have been too mad with grief to think properly.”

That hurt. Steve inhaled sharply. “You don’t think I miss him as much as everyone else?”

“No, no!” Max cried rushing to reassure him. “That’s not what he meant at all. Right, Dustin?”

Dustin looked between them, eyes wide. “No of course not. What I meant was that you’re always level headed in a fight. Everyone else would have been so caught up in their grief it might have broke them.”

Steve sighed and went over to Dustin, hugging him again. “He misses you.”

Dustin started crying again. “I want him back. I just...”

“I know,” Steve murmured. “Me, too. Me, too.”

“Which is why we need to get the party back together,” Max said.

“We were only planning to destroy the gates and kill Vecna,” Dustin agreed. “But now we have to save Eddie, too.”

Steve nodded. “We’re going to need Wayne, too.”

Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11   Part 12  Part 13

Tag List: @estrellami-1 @anzelsilver @thequeenrainacorn @savory-babby @chaoticlovingdreamer @grtwdsmwhr @renaissan-vvitch @panicatthediaz @swimmingbirdrunningrock

#My writing #stranger things #steddie #vampire eddie #ladykailtiha writes

[miracles-and-butterflies]

How did fractured Luisa react when she find out that Pedro abused Mirabel?

*fan girl screaming* You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this question.

Very, very sickened.

Warning: sensitive topics below.

~~~~~~

And Yet He Shot the Fawn

Luisa almost forgot what she was meant to be doing. A hug is the furthest thing in her mind. She is too busy staring at Mirabel’s back, neck and upper arms through the tears in her blouse, now that she’s closer… it looks awful. She can see the inside of Mirabel’s neck in one of the cuts.

Some of them are deep, like slices. Some are barely there. Some raised on her skin. Some are bloody and leaking profusely. Some are pink and angry. Some are white and fading.

There isn’t a patch of skin that isn’t marked.

All this time Luisa and Camilo have mocked Mirabel’s perfect posture and stiff back and shoulders…

No wonder. She looks like she would shatter.

But how did she get these injuries?

They look too precise to be an accident or an animal. Mirabel wouldn’t get into a fight. And it’s not like she could have done it herself, the angle is wrong.

It has to be someone else. Nobody spends time alone with her…

“Abuelo did it.”

Mirabel’s coldness broke a little at the name. She paled and took a small step back.

“You are tired and stressed, Luisa. You should get some rest—”

“He did. Didn’t he?”

Mirabel shifted from one foot to the other. “He and my tutors.”

There’s been so many tutors over the years. Is that why they were replaced so quickly? Coming and going from nowhere to prevent gossip?

All those adults… adults who were trusted by their family.

“When?” Luisa asked.

“I-I lost count; I don’t know the dates… it started when I was six. It hasn’t stopped.”

Is that why her blouse is all bloody and ripped now? Is that why Abuelo had been in her room just now? Is that why he has a riding crop - even though he has never owned a horse?

Has he been using a weapon on her this whole time?

“Why?”

“You have to understand that he isn’t doing it to hurt me.” Mirabel insists. “I was making mistakes and getting emotional. He is doing it to help me. I failed. I was being a burden to our family, I had to be taught a lesson.”

She doesn’t actually believe this… does she?

“I should find our parents, or someone else in the family. They can help—”

“Nobody will care.”

“What?”

“I call them Señor and Señora. I can’t feel, Luisa. Everyone is scared of me. Or thinks I’m a heartless monster. Or both. I haven’t had a relationship with anyone since I was Antonio’s age.” Mirabel’s eyes and voice are wracked with distress; the rest of her is oddly calm. “I don’t know what it feels like to love and be loved anymore. Abuelo does not love me. He loves my gift - if it were to disappear tomorrow, he’d want nothing to do with me.”

A tear slips from her eye then.

Luisa hates herself.

She (and Camilo) have teased and mocked and bullied this girl senseless. Abuelo Pedro’s little favourite. Señorita sin corazón.

She remembers Mirabel before her ceremony, a very different girl, begging Luisa to protect her.

“I don’t want a gift,” she’d weeped under their beds, ten years ago. “I want to stay here with you in the nursery. It’s safe here.”

And fuck. She was right.

That whole thing with Isabela? All those years ago was true… Isabela wasn’t just being bossy and annoying when she’d hiss at them to stop. She knew it happened once. Does she know it’s still going on?

And their parents? How could they not know? Even if they didn’t believe Isabela back then, wouldn’t they have checked with Mirabel?

What about Tía Pepa? She heals people. She heals everyone. Didn’t she ever think it was strange how she’s never treated Mirabel in the past nine years?

“I heard the cracks that night.” Luisa gasps dramatically before she can stop herself. “I wasn’t sure with all the commotion at first. I told him when we went back into Antonio’s room. He said, ‘If you can’t use your gift correctly, I will bash your head into the wall until you do. Like a soft arepa.”

Luisa just put a hand over her mouth.

At least she’d just been made to look like she was drunk.

“He didn't say the arepa bit.” Mirabel said, flat. “I thought it would be funny. I thought if I could cry, I could smile too. I suppose not.”

Luisa felt bile in her throat.

#encanto #encanto fracture au #ask me anything #my writing #luisa madrigal #mirabel madrigal #pedro madrigal

[miraculousmultifan]

Taylor Swift prompt fest!

Steve / Eddie Shake It Off Season 02 AU - the Halloween Party The most Steve-coded of these Steve-coded lyrics: I go on too many dates But I can't make 'em stay But I keep cruisin' Can't stop, won't stop movin' It's like I got this music in my mind Sayin' it's gonna be alright

My ex-man brought his new girlfriend She's like, "Oh my God!" but I'm just gonna shake And to the fella over there with the hella good hair Won't you come on over, baby? We can shake, shake, shake (yeah)

hiii!! thank you so much for the prompt! i hope you enjoy the fic :D

as a reminder, this is part of my event: stranger things (taylor's version), and you can find the prompt list HERE

i'm also cross-posting this fic (and every other fic from this event) to my ao3, so if you'd prefer to read it there, HERE IS THE LINK

Shake It Off

When Steve stepped out of the bathroom, leaving Nancy to… freshen up, he hadn’t wanted to see Jonathan Byers right after. But nothing ever seemed to go his way after that slimy monster attacked them, did it? 

It doesn’t matter. Just shake it off, man.

“Hey, Steve,” Jonathan called to him meekly. “Have you seen Nancy? She invited me, but I haven’t seen her since I got here.”

It’s probably not what you think, Steve. Shake it off.

“She’s in the bathroom by the kitchen. She’s gotten pretty drunk so you should probably drive her home,” Steve replied, deadpan, trying to keep his voice even to avoid making a scene.

Jonathan cocked his head. “You aren’t taking her?”

Trying to think of any other excuse that wasn’t ‘we had a fight and the sight of her right now makes me want to scream,’ Steve replied, “I’ve been drinking too, man. Don’t wanna get a DUI.”

Without another word, they parted ways. As Steve was walking away, he heard Nancy delightedly exclaim, “Jonathan!” His chest clenched, and he attempted to stop the scowl from darkening his face.

Shake. It. Off. Steve!

Although he hadn’t realized he was doing it, Steve made his way to the kitchen to grab another drink. Beer wasn’t really cutting it anymore, but he remembered seeing someone dump vodka into the fruit punch, so he poured himself a hefty cup of the stuff. If he was going to stick around this party, Steve certainly wasn’t going to do it without adding a little artificial fun.

Once he had started feeling the buzz of the alcohol fogging up his brain pleasantly, Steve joined the thrum of people in the living room dancing. The current song was one that Steve couldn’t remember the name of, but he knew that he loved it!

While the kind of dancing everyone else was doing seemed to revolve around nodding their heads, tapping their feet, and just generally trying to look cool, Steve let himself loosen up. It was like he became the center of attention, feeling the music move through him as he matched the beat with his body.

And it was fun! Way more fun than if he decided to go straight home and mope around in his empty house because Nancy didn’t love him.

The thought of Nancy sobered him up a little, though. Now he was at the point where he could hear conversations happening around him.

“I saw Nancy Wheeler leave the party with that loner, Byers. Harrington really can’t make them stay. Imagine losing your girlfriend to the same guy twice.”

“You’d think after dating half of the female student body he’d figure out how to get a girl to like him for more than just a quick fuck.”

Steve tried to lose himself in the music again.

“Harrington really fell off, huh. That weird fucking dance makes him look like a barfing cat.”

“Literally! I can’t believe we all thought he was cool. This is so lame it’s sad.”

For some reason, Steve found himself sinking back into the feeling from before. He was having fun. He was making his own dance up, and it felt great!

Soon, though, the song switched to something with a different beat, and Steve had to find the rhythm again. When he opened his eyes to get a better grip on his bearings though, he was looking directly at Eddie Munson standing in the corner.

He looked unimpressed and generally disinterested, and Steve frowned. It was a really bad look to have someone unhappy at your party. Sure, technically it wasn’t Steve’s party, but as the proclaimed “King of Parties,” he was basically his duty to right this infraction.

Before Steve even realized he was walking, his feet led him straight to Munson, stopping him too close for the average person’s comfort. He started drafting what he was going to say, trying to find the right combination of words that would get Munson to have fun, but instead…

“If you’re here for weed, your Majesty, I’m afraid I’m fresh out of stock for the night,” Munson drawled, watching Steve with guarded eyes.

“What?” Steve blinked once. Then twice. Oh… “Ah, right. Weed.” Ever eloquent, that was where Steve’s mouth decided to shut off.

Munson raised an eyebrow at Steve suspiciously. “If you weren’t looking for weed, why are you standing here?”

“You’re not having fun,” Steve stated. Come on, get to the point, Steve!

Putting on a theatrical face, Munson sing-songed, “What an astute observation, my Lord! Though, I do regret to inform you that this is strictly a business venture. Nobody has fun when they’re conducting business, my Liege.”

All of Munson’s fancy words were kind of fucking up Steve’s ability to get the words he wanted to say out of his brain and into his mouth. “Huh?”

Munson sighed, obviously becoming fed up with Steve's conversation skills. “Did this conversation have a point, or did the braincells I lost while standing here just die for nothing?”

“Come dance with me!” Steve finally suggested.

“I beg your everloving fuck?” Munson answered, his face twisted in several different complicated expressions.

Steve grinned. “You’re not having fun, so come dance with me! I wasn’t having fun a couple minutes ago, and now I feel great!” He paused for a moment and frowned. “Though I guess that could’ve been the vodka…”

Munson pinched the bridge of his nose and grumbled under his breath, seeming just to himself, “Why are you even entertaining this, Eddie? Get a grip!” Then he relaxed his shoulders and looked up, staring at Steve calculatingly as he said, “So let me make sure I got this right. You, Steve Harrington, are inviting me, Eddie Munson, to dance with you in this crowded room full of practically every popular kid in our high school.”

“You know, you have really nice hair,” Steve replied instead. “What conditioner do you use? It looks so soft.”

Squinting at him like he had two heads, Munson finally relented and snarked, “It seems like someone should be chaperoning you right now, so… I guess I can rise to the occasion for once.”

Steve beamed at Eddie and led him deeper into the mass of people so they could be closer to the music. Once he found what he deemed to be the perfect spot, Steve let himself feel the music once again. He wanted to get rid of all that other shit.

The gossipmongers at Hawkins High always start shit at every opportunity. Sometimes the most basic things get circulated through every rumor mill, and Steve had given up trying to plaster on a fake smile and put on a show.

Suddenly, Steve turned to Eddie and said, “Hey, you’re against all that conformist shit, right? Like doing your own thing or something?”

“Yeah, man… I am,” Eddie replied carefully.

Steve smiled, hoping he figured out how to get Eddie to really join him. “That’s what this is. Dancing like an idiot because it’s lame and so fun and I don’t have to worry about anyone else’s… bullshit.”

Eddie hummed, watching Steve appraisingly before his lips quirked up into something a couple of degrees off of affection. “Alright, I think I can get behind that. Wanna pretend like we’re the lead singers of this band performing a sold-out show?”

Brightening considerably, Steve pumped his fist. “Hell yeah!”

Once Steve gave his approval, Eddie whipped out an air guitar and started strumming viciously, his motions not at all synced up to “Girls Just Want to Have Fun.” Steve grinned and picked up his own fake microphone, tilting the stand around like he was Elvis Presley while he headbanged aggressively. Cyndi Lauper was not an artist people would usually headbang to, but it was fun, so Steve was doing it.

Naturally, people started to stand and gawk at their display, but their confused and disgusted looks only seemed to fuel Eddie’s energy. Hey, that’s what Steve had been trying to do! Getting Eddie to join him was definitely the right choice.

Matching Eddie’s enthusiasm, Steve leaned in closer to him to share the microphone as if they were singing a duet. Eddie snorted out a surprised laugh at Steve’s antics, but he still joined in with the charade.

Even when people started whispering around them, Steve didn’t care anymore. Their words slid off of him like water off his back. Plus, Eddie looked like he was having fun too.

Steve was starting to forget why he had been so upset before… Eh, it was probably just some stupid bullshit anyway.

#mira writes #stranger things (taylor's version) #stranger things #taylor swift #steddie #steve harrington/eddie munson #stranger things season 2

[seancekitsch]

could I please request a hughie campbell smut? with the reader being morally gray (kind of like billy) but hughie being kind of her soft spot + some smut with bottom!hughie + some of the boys teasing reader for having a soft spot for hughie

okay its not explicitly smut but its def heavily talking about the smut happening idk i think it works but i did not follow the prompt well i am sorry for that

It’s not that Hughie tries to eavesdrop, really, it’s not. But none of his friends are exactly subtle unless their lives depend on it, and even then that’s not always a guarantee. 

It starts when he hears Annie drag you aside when they’re all drinking at the flatiron building. It’s only two months after she moved out all of her stuff from their shared apartment to her dream one. The one on her vision board from her teen years. 

“Look, this isn’t because I’m his ex,” she starts, and you nod before sipping your beer, understandingly, “But Hughie?”

You smile at the mere mention of his name. 

“I mean, I thought him and Butcher would get together before you and him.”

It’s then that you splutter against the rim of your bottle. 

“He’s not- We’re not- not yet I mean but-“ you can’t find the words. Hughie finds it adorable how flustered you can get, it’s just rare someone other than him can make you this way. 

“It’s okay,” Annie tries to soothe you, “I give my blessing. You know I love you both.” 

Hughie figures this whole exchange makes sense. Annie loved him with her whole being for two whole years, she knows him better than most people, the only other person being Robin. She knows what he looks like when he’s falling for someone; he’s just happy she’s still looking out for him. Another act of love. 

Hughie closes his eyes in the elevator. 

“Fuck yeah, babe,” you whine, thighs straining as you push yourself up and down on his cock, your hand wrapping around his throat. 

“Please,” you beg, but for no one. Hughie has given you full control in this situation. He wants you to take what you want from him and he gives it all so willingly. 

The ding of the elevator snaps him from his memory. 

All of you are already arguing in what is the makeshift meeting room, with you and Frenchie arguing both verbally and signing to keep Kimoko up to date when your mouths move faster than she cares to read. From what he can see, you and MM are covered in blood and mad as fuck about it, with Butcher and Maeve charactersitically nonchalant about it, but Annie, Frenchie and Kimoko being upset for you. 

“C’mon you can’t be mad at me for my methods, Bill,” you exclaim, “You’re the one that taught me!” 

It’s clear immediately that you and MM are mad for different reasons. 

“I’m not mad at that, its just, do you have to make such a fuckin show of yourself?” Billy relents.

“Show? Show?! You’re kidding, right?”

MM stops his raving to listen to you. 

“You’re the one that sent me and M in there and told me to act like a supe. You practically begged me to make a show. You wanted me to do that.”

“You fuckin told her to do that?” MM shouts, and the fighting begins again. 

Hughie clears his throat and tries to break the insane tension. 

“Lets agree to give everyone the intel next time?” he offers, knowing it lets you off the hook and gets everyone to stop screaming. 

You immediately move a bit closer to him, whispering a thanks before you slink off to clean your face. 

Kimiko approaches Hughie almost immediately after. 

‘Some blood on you too’ she signs, and at his confused look, she presses her thumb to his neck and rubs it slightly. When nothing comes off on her fingers, her eyes widen slightly. 

“What?” Hughie asks, but Kimiko only smiles as her eyes widen further and she runs off towards Frenchie. 

It wouldn’t be until he got himself into the bathroom later that he would realize there was a monster sized hickie on his neck. 

The rest of them realized when Maeve finally said something. You had walked in like normal, fifteen minutes and thirty agonizing seconds after Hughie just like normal. Your black eye hidden by big sunglasses anyone else would assume was for a hangover and a tray of Starbucks in your hand as you strut comfortably into the building you used as headquarters. Your ride up the elevator was uneventful, thoughts of the bruises on your inner thighs caused by Hughie and not at all by anything nefarious. You shifted carefully on legs still sore from riding him all night as the elevator opened again. 

“And Hughie’s owner finally arrives!” Maeve shouts, the heat draining from your face. You step out of the elevator before it brings you back down again to see Hughie pale as if the pigmentation of his skin left him completely. 

“What?” Maeve asks, fake shock on her features, “Like we didn’t all know?”

Annie and Kimiko share a look, they know, of course they did. Butcher is the first to react.

“You two?”

“Really?” Frenchie asks, but its all in jest because its clear Kimiko filled him in. 

“Never thought you’d go for crazy," MM remarks, but then shrugs as if he's had his own thoughts on this all along. Hughie take you in like its the first time seeing you again, removing your sunglasses to reveal swollen and punched eyes and wounds definitely inflected on you by someone else that a Forensic Files episode would tell you were made in defense of their life and he can't think of anything more beautiful despite how fucked up it might be.

"I've got your coffee," you announce, not at all reacting to anyone else in the room, your eyes trained only on Hughie.

#hughie campbell x reader

[plethomacademia]

wip wednesday why not both edition

I really thought everyone was going to pick Maevetash and then it was just split enough I am doing both.

First is Maevetash having a fight after the heist because Maeve kind of uses the slayer form without ever telling Enver about it (even though he knows it from rumor, etc, but he's never seen it and she drops it on him when Meph sends out his fake "oh no not my croooown" fight to make them think he isn't letting them get away with it (he is)). Warning this is first draft no edit.

jump with Z'rell under the jump you fucking monsters

Maeve dropped her focus, causing the portal on the floor to close. She took in deep breaths of non-metallic air, shivered at the comparably cold air of the material plane. Then she realized that Enver was shouting. “What in the hells was that stunt you pulled?” He was in her face now and she pulled back, blinking up at him. Then she realized he was talking about the Slayer. “I believe I saved our lives--” she started to say, but he was shouting over her. “I don’t even want to know how long you have been hiding that little trick, Maeve, but —” She shouted over him in turn. “I do not owe you any explanations of anything I — ” “— I will not tolerate you changing a plan on a whim to suit your —” “— am able to do or when I choose to do it, Enver, if you didn’t notice there were a dozen —” “— tastes and terrible decision making whenever you let your emotions compromise — ” She grabbed him by the shirt front and whirled him around, slammed him against the wall. He fell silent as the breath was knocked out of him and she kept him silent but putting her forearm against his chest, pressed on him to make sure he could only breathe enought o keep himself alive. “You will not question me. I give you information as I see fit and you will be happy when I do so,” she snarled at him. “You are losing control,” he finally said. She pressed even more. “I assure you, I am perfectly in control of myself, Enver. Now, do you have the crown or do you not?”

OK and the Z'rell is a what if my big half orc dyke Tav got caught while they were freeing the tieflings/dark gnomes in the basement and maybe Z'rell takes a special interest in her:

When she is sure that the woman’s dark eyes are focused on her and not just pointing forward, Z’rell smiles. “A true soul for a true soul,” she says. “But you aren't just any true soul, are you? You’re something different if you can fool me like you did before.” The woman does not reply. “You are a prize, to be sure. What is your name?” The woman starts to speak, then she coughs. The sound of it is wet, suggesting internal bleeding of some kind. Z’rell waits her out, waits for her to beg, and then the cough turns into a laugh. “You can’t even get my fucking name out of my head, can you?” the woman says in the voice Z’rell remembers from earlier, a deep rumbling sound that matches the woman better than a voice ought to. Blood runs down her chin and she begins to laugh anew. She sounds almost delirious, quite likely is after all her injuries, and after a moment she is back to coughing. Z’rell waits again, makes sure that it is quiet enough for the woman to hear what she has to say. “I haven’t even begun with you yet. Why don’t you spend the night in that chair and we will see how you feel about things tomorrow?” The woman smiles, white tusks against pink lips against coated-red teeth. “It’s a date then.” On her way out of the prisons, Z’rell pulls a guard aside and makes it clear that the woman is not to be out of anyone’s sight. As she climbs the stairs, she thinks to herself that is a shame that the Chosen will likely have the woman killed by morning. She looks like an awful lot of fun.

#wip #maeve #drogga #YEAH BOTH #I REALLY TRULY THOUGHT NO ONE WOULD PICK Z'RELL