#i need to find my motivation again

[zarovich]

miss when i was younger cuz even tho i was still severely depressed and suicidal, at least i had still motivation and passion. now it's completely gone

#personal #tbf while i was still sickly then in terms of like my immune system being far worse... my chronic illnesses have gotten worse with age #back then i could draw without my hands locking up or i could run around for longer without the world spinning #now i have to be very careful with the things or i do or ill end up in having to get extra rest or worse. end up in the hospital #having to deal with these issues has unfortunately taken away my passion for things i once loved and im finding it hard to rekindle it #the good things i can say.. at least my immune system is stronger. my nutrition is better. im not in denial about (most of) my conditions #im just rambling out rn. i dont feel particularly good today. im sure that is obvious withwhat i say tho #its day like this where i wish i had my cat with me. i still miss her and im not sure i will ever stop missing her #i need to find my motivation again

[elatedfool]

okay but big spoon aventurine? him just staring at your back—unaware of the admiration pouring from his eyes (and the tears, because he can't believe that he got so lucky to have you).

his fingers combing your hair to soothe you, making sure that no bad dreams come to haunt you—if they do, he'll hold you tightly no matter how hard you're thrashing and kicking, he would even try to whispers a few words to reassure you (even if he's not good at it—for you, he'll try) until you calm down.

#brainrotting again... can't seem to find motivation to finish my wip sigh #anw i still think he likes being the little spoon more though #man needs love #fairy's chatter｡ #hsr x reader #hsr x you #hsr fluff #honkai star rail x reader #aventurine x reader #aventurine x you

[bixels]

While I do think anon was rude, I do think it's pretty shitty to set up all this stuff you were going to add the au and then just drop it. It's disappointing. Definitely unfollowing.

Bye.

#ask me #anon #once AGAIN. #I am not dropping anything #the au is not getting cancelled. more than likely i'm gonna take a break from it until i find motivation again #But I've been drawing the AU for half a fucking year #In that time I've only drawn 5 things that aren't mlp related #I'm getting tired and my last few posts didn't do as well as I'd hoped #And I'm not about to burn myself out on mlp au art even if I really do love making it #I'm still gonna make comics. I have a bunch of ideas. #Tulli and I still wanna do the limited run merch shop #Discord is still coming. Sunset is still coming. Sombra is still coming. I have so many ideas #But I need to do something else for my own sake. Did you know I was supposed to get the background 6 designs done by now #But I didn't because I'm TIRED #I've been keeping myself on a schedule to keep content pumping despite travel and school and family and I'm tired #what i'm getting isn't matching what i'm giving and that's nobody's fault. i'm not frustrated at anyone. a slump was bound to happen #drawing the au was fun until it become my Thing. Because when your Thing––your identity––starts to faulter #it can really make you freak out #And that's not healthy for the project or for myself. I need to find the fun again and I'm sure I will #I'm really appreciative of everyone's support in my inbox and replies it really does mean a lot especially given that about 2/3 of my #followers followed for mlp. But if you're gonna react to me saying “i'm gonna cool down on mlp art and draw my own stuff” with “i'm #disappointed in you." then Leave! I think it's good you're unfollowing #you are not obligated to stick by my side! But don't act like I'm doing you a disservice by turning my attention elsewhere #I didn't promise anyone anything and I definitely didn't say I'm breaking any promises.

[enden-k]

rlly had an exhausting day at work (physical pain/discomfort almost had me lose my mind ngl) but its all forgotten upon seeing haithams cute lil feathers sticking out when i come online

everything is fine <3 i wanna draw. i wanna play. i wanna sleep

#haitham and rain irl it rlly doesnt take too much to comfort me LMAO #also #got a bit of free time for a few days and then again for some more so #ill def get back to drawing again #altho might focus on other blog first bc of a wonderful anon giving me motivation LMAO #and also bc patreon drafts #rlly need to find a way to handle everything n structure + my stupid ass condition n hearing aids appointments ughh i just wanna laze aroun #tbd #genshin tag

[milla-art-corner]

Getting hyped with my new apple pen, so here’s my queen Ava. I miss her everyday 🙏🏼😭

#ava ire #ava’s demon #god how I want this comic back #please Michelle #just give us a sign of life 🙏🏼 #I’m dying here #I need to know what happens next #anyway #I’ll post the finished piece here as well #sorry I don’t post a lot 🤷🏽 #it’s so hard to find the motivation to draw #but the hype of finally drawing in procreate has helped #plus I can take the tablet anywhere and draw #which is incredibly liberating #I drew this while waiting for my mom in the hair salon #I feel like a kid again #drawing and listening to music #nothing else that needed to be done #just wait while my mother runs errands #well #happy new year all #my art

[pallanophblargh]

I’m sorry you feel like your brain is soup, but for what it’s worth I’ve been following you since I was like 14 on deviantart and the stuff you have created has always been a major inspiration for me; i love animals and fantasy and your ability to capture realistic proportions and anatomy while creating this beautiful movement in your artwork has always blown me away, it’s so full of life and beauty. I just wanted to tell you 🤷 you really inspired this random Australian kid and I hope you can find joy and rest and kindness for yourself k bye

Aaaaaa this is so wholesome! I haven't been enduring as much of my usual mental health struggle since I've started meds/therapy, but my creativity/productivity has regrettably taken a hit as a possible result? So even if I'm on indefinite hiatus, it's nice to know I've had a positive impact on at least one person somewhere down the line. Someday I'll get back into healthy habits and express through art more reliably again (I mean art has been my escape portal for most of my life)! Just gotta bust off the rust and focus/practice again, even if I'm anxious about all the work that requires. Anyway, I'm rambling: thank you so much!

#april rambles #wholesome asks #anonymous #text post #I'm literally an adult with a wiggly 4 year old toddler brain most days? #like it's always been there but now whatever I've done this last few years really unleashed it #I just need to find the motivation and courage to art again #mostly putting my hands in the dirt these days #I guess I've been more of a nature admirer than an artist I suppose #I just want to pay proper tribute and that's impossible #but you know that won't stop me trying #thanks to all of you who have stuck around

[achillvs]

i think i need bts again.

#for years ive been firm of the opinion and the feeling #that bts find you when u need them most #and that was so true for me in 2016 #all the way until 2020 ish #i needed them to hold my hand while i was growing up bc no one else would #and then i healed a bit and they did too #i got busy and so did they #and now im 26 and im a graduated artist with an office job #idk how to find the drive to make art. #i dont have inspiration or motivation #i need to do it but idk how #making art with bts was So easy #literal 7 muses with you at all times #i took a walk for the first time in forever #just 20 minutes to pick up a package #golden hour light #jimin's like crazy came on shuffle which is the first time i heard any of their voices in months #and i saw an art piece in my head #and then outro wings came on too #and idk #it was light and it was colors and sound and heart #i think now i need them to hold my hand again but as artists #i think if i listened to paradise or black swan rn it would break me #but maybe thats what i need #shut up matt #bts

[leqclerc]

Listen, I’ll come around to it and understand it if it’s something that came from Xavi himself, if this is something he wanted, maybe something he needed for whatever personal reason. I’m just concerned because this is so sudden. I mean, he just flew out with the team to Miami and absolutely nothing seemed amiss. If he was on his way out (or switching roles I guess) Charles clearly didn’t know because he didn’t say anything about it over radio and I know he would’ve if he knew (as is customary for drivers who know they’re getting a new race engineer.) I’m heartbroken that they were “robbed” of this moment. It’s one thing knowing someone’s leaving and being able to prepare and idk having an appropriate sendoff. But we had nothing of that sort here. Even Ferrari’s official statement – just saying it’s an “organisational update” – feels cold and impersonal. I hope they’ll acknowledge him and maybe prepare some kind of sendoff post for him later on but I’m not holding my breath.

Whatever happened it must’ve happened in the past five days. Again I’m concerned and confused because it’s so sudden? And with Imola coming up, one of the home races for Ferrari, mid-season, the start of the European leg – with upgrades due as well – the timing arguably couldn’t be worse. I always said it takes time for driver/race engineer pairs to work out the intricacies of their relationship, to find what works for them. This smacks of the Bottas situation – and he ended up getting a penalty the first weekend he was with his new race engineer precisely because they weren’t in sync, there was room for confusion and miscommunication. I know it’s a bit different seeing as Bryan’s been part of Charles’s side of the garage for years – at least as long as Xavi has – but afaik he’s never been, like, an actual race engineer for a driver. And that’s obviously a whole challenge in itself and will undoubtedly take some time getting used to on both sides.

Again, if something justifies the urgency then okay, I get it. I sincerely hope everything’s okay on Xavi’s end.

But yeah. Disappointing, confusing, very weird.

#text #everything was fine… everything was normal… i’m completely blindsided by this. i thought we’d have stability in that regard #i know he’s not a big deal to most people - some are even happy after slandering him and making him into a meme for years #but idk. this is such a blow to me personally? #and again this on top of a bad day already like. it just feels like everything i’ve loved and cared about is falling away #i’m finding it hard to still be enthusiastic and motivated for things when this is how it ends #maybe i need a break from f1 and maybe this will be my final straw #eh:( #xavi marcos

[alexxmason]

Wip Day

Tagged by @captmactavish @cloudofbutterflies92 @simonxriley @marivenah 💕 Tagging @carlosoliveiraa @bbrocklesnar @ghastlyrider @finding-comfort-in-rain @cassietrn @direwombat @onehornedbeast @aceghosts and everyone💕💕

I've been trying to find time and energy to write and just now working on random ideas i have (I HAVE PLANS THAT I CAN'T SHARE YET..) Just some Ariel being a lowkey hypocrite 🙄 and Sel x Russ idea I had. **All subject to change/editing/never being posted.

Ariel x Edward

Nothing changed. This city has never changed for the better since Wayne’s promise and his demise. While she was at The Iceberg Lounge, Ariel watched politicians enter the Below 44 club and exit high or drunk while people were on the streets, asking for a dime. And it made her sick to her stomach. How they could be with strangers while their spouses tucked in their children and their community begged for scraps.

Gotham City was still so poisonous and dark. A cancerous thing to be ripped out. 

This place needed a drastic shift. Things only get worse every year and now there was a costumed menace brutalizing people down on their luck while the rich and powerful kept partying. But Edward fixated on this menace’s brutal form of “justice” and Ariel didn’t see what Edward did in him. But she believed in his plans to shake and reshape Gotham. Extreme measures but it would ensure change and justice. And Ariel wanted the front row seat when it happens.

Some random thing 🥲

 Something was wrong there. She was sure of it. Selena didn’t know when she started to believe in ghosts or if she ever did, but now she was wondering if maybe some was haunting the residents.

 It was something she refused to think of at that moment. Not when she was holding her head in pain and caught her superior’s gaze. An expression she couldn’t place, “Don’t look at me like that,” Selena sat back onto her cot and buried her face in her hands when he asked what she meant. In a hushed yell, “Like that.”

 A look for either pity or disappointment. Whatever it was, the last thing Selena wanted or needed was a look of worry. Or even maybe she just wasn’t cut out for the job, but lucky for her she could never really read her handler.

#Ariel is real one tho 🫡 #ride or die terrorist style ig sksksj #Selena being baby as usually and she just needs a break for some reason #trying to motivate and find time to write again? baby come back? #I’m not totally happy w my writing rn so I just don’t have a lot (comes w the hard burn out) 😭😭😭 #tagged: wip #oc: ariel herrera #oc: selena b valdez #x: bell and chain #valdez x adler

[mellotronmkll]

I need to figure out a way to bring the joy and excitement back to playing the guitar ☹️

#Like it's been feeling like an obligation lately and I used to not be able to live without it #And like idk performing is starting to feel very rote so and like #If I just work on my originals that would solve both problems but I can never motivate myself #Like I don't know...i need to find a couple like challenge songs to try to learn to play and maybe that will help me get excited #Enough to where I can actually find playing it inspiring again #I'm just so uninspired right now

[millenniummmbop]

rivalshipping is about healing to me but like in a “well-meaning yet still ill-advised codependency” way

#*pulls down projection screen and extends my collapsible pointer stick thing* #Yugi was a lonely kid with unresolved anger issues who went too far w the whole revenge fantasy thing #until The Power Of Friendship TM mellowed him out and he finally landed in a more emotionally stable state #*clicks to next slide* #meanwhile kaiba over here is ALSO a lonely kid with unresolved anger issues who ALSO went too far w his own fucked up revenge fantasy #*quickly shuffles through slides of Death-T* #but two mind-shattering comas later and yugi at the very least was willing to bury the hatchet and try to start over again #the whole 'kaiba vs peg sus' fiasco was where everyone finds out kaiba's motives up to that point and where it all finally clicks for yugi #*clicks to next slide to reveal the 'he just like me fr' meme but it's yugi crying on the balcony inside peggy's castle* #it's after this that yugi starts thinking 'Well friendship fixed ME so maybe it can fix HIM too' #*clicks next slide and hits play on the embedded video* #Yugi: good morning kaiba-kun! nice weather we're having today huh? #Kaiba: I'm going to beat u in the face and in the ass #Yugi: haha alright bud I'll see u at regionals tomorrow #Yugi said so himself that he wanted 'friends he could count on and who could count on him' (paraphrasing) #i think he saw this mess of a human being recklessly barreling towards the edge at 100 miles an hour and said #'yeah this looks like something i can personally fix' #bc he's the type of person to just selflessly shoulder a mountain of burdens if it means helping someone he cares about #like his heart is definitely in the right place but i don't think he realizes that kaiba also needs like #therapy and mood stabilizers or some shit #*a voice rings out from the back of the class* #'op they had like 10 minutes of conversation MAX over the entirety of duelist kingdom this is literally all in ur head* #no no the groundwork is there for all of this i PROMISE #lion king rafiki voice: look harder #like yes i'm delusional but i'm also RIGHT #(⓿_⓿) #ignore me

[mittenlady]

chapter 15 of CAYA is finally finished. unfortunately i will not be posting anything until i finish chapter 17 <3

#mitten lady writing things #yeah all it took was an 8 AM in a hall with a nice study lounge and having no classes afterward #technically i have hw i need to be doing but i just sat here for like 3 hours and now intend to get subway #if we do bad at regionals then i’ll have a lot more time to write too #but i also will have less of a social life and so. i will need to find another hobby . until next semester #mawk twial is literally half my social life #anyway i just want to finish CAYA. #i at least want to get to the point where the chapters are just the ones detailing in game events #because those are substantially easier to write lol #it’s been really hard getting back into writing after months of being away from it #and tbh i’m struggling to maintain my motivation as intensely as i did this summer again #BUT i’m really excited to write the obligatory post 4-4 scene ;) #and then chapters 22 and 25 i’m very excited for

[voltaicfox]

What's going on in that boy's head..? (Part 3/3)

Oooo super cool plan? Nope, just a Strider fucking around.

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 (you've reached the end of this line!)

#Homestuck #Dave Strider #Kankri Vantas #Vriska Serket #Terezi Pyrope #(barely) #Vantas Family Comic #my art #fishiestdraws #sorry this took almost a year to finish i needed to find motivation to do this series again

[arcxnumvitae]

Aur cannot leave Seelie for long amounts of time after becoming entwined with the land. He may leave for a day or so without any ill effects, but what he does not yet fully know, since no ruler prior had ever left Seelie for so long, is that absences of a week/two weeks or more would start to show detrimental effects. Both with him and with Seelie.

Aur would grow lethargic, a little more tired and with a little less energy as the effects first made themselves known. Seelie itself would appear less vibrant in its coloration, and its plantlife would begin to droop ever so slightly as well. As time passed with them separated, the effects would grow more pronounced and it would be around the month mark that things would start to grow dire. One cannot live without the other.

It will be a harrowing realization for Aur.

#{Aur Headcanon #mobile #earlier today when I was away from my computer I said I needed to write this headcanon up #because this phenomena got like a one line mention in a bundle of Seelie headcanons years ago #but didn’t really get expounded on because Aur wasn’t really making any trips like that #but with Steph’s upcoming thing being I believe a week of stuff she said? #(once again Steph feel free to pop in and correct me 😂) #I realized he’d probably start having to deal with that #but I forgot to write it when I was at my computer so here I am typing this now 🥴 #anyways it’ll suck for Aur to find out that you are /locked down/ locked down #and it’s another weakness to keep close to the chest from any parties with less than savory motives finding out

[tiney-tadpole]

Hi! Would it be okay if you shared some random info about any oc you want? I'd love to learn more about your world and characters and I unfortunately don't know any less awkward way to do it

Hi, it's not awkward!! I love talking about my ocs, I am just shy and don't post a lot of details about them unprompted😔

They all have a lot of lore behind them so always feel free to ask for details if you want to(it's why my ask box is open <3)

I have been working on them a lot more cuz I'm still recovering from surgery and can't get out of bed! Particularly Coshor, which is a very small nation at the Hiridescent Peaks, the mountain range where the sun god lives. It's a very prosperous place and the wealthiest country in the world, a lot of old old ill-gotten money there. Most people would consider the attitude of the Coshorians to be "intolerable," they're all very snooty and vain. All their needs are easily met so they get to be rich and unworried and bored. They mostly mess with each other to pass the time.

I drew their queen recently, Queen Annette II. She's been queen for over 30 years, since she was crowned at the age of fifteen. She has not changed a bit. She was the previous king and queens most beloved. She got nothing but the best and was treated like a most precious doll. She was pampered and prepped and cared for, she was the spitting image of her mother. Her mother would be where a lot of high societies vain attitude came from, she was considered the fairest of all until her youth started to fade and her daughter took the spot light. No one would dare propose the idea she might be jealous of the princess though.

Unfortunately Annette II ascended the throne after the very untimely and unexplained death of her parents. Disappearance might be the better word for it.

She's the subject of many hushed rumors, and anyone too nosy is never seen or heard from again. They say the mask she always wears now is just a way of mourning her parents, others say it's to hide disfigurement she received in the accident the killed the previous king and queen. Whatever happened to her dear parents seems to be a common occurrence now, as many people have been going missing in that castle since then. Aside from that everything is fine, so no one really cares to peek behind closed doors. After all have you seen the Videcks new curtains? How garish, now that's something someone ought to do something about.

Whatever it was must've traumatized the poor dear, she hardly speaks anymore. Those who once knew her would hardly recognize her. The young light of the nation was now an unusual and mysterious flicker. Relying on her most personal guard and attendant, Emerald, as a mouth piece and arm. Refusing to even leave the royal manor, she just sends him in her stead.

Of course there are many a rumor about him as well, having belonged to the previous queen and his suspicious connection to the fae. Seeming to be eternally youthful just like the queen. People will swear they've seen fae circles in the royal manors garden as of late, but those rumors are quick to be hushed and shoulders looked over.

Whatever it was that happened to that poor thing is very mysterious indeed.

#oc tag #ask #Queen Annette #Emerald #I need to start tagging my ocs names again raaa #thank you for asking I love talking about my boys #I tried to keep it short but it's still kind of long so I'm sorry haha #I actually have a comic about her in the works if I ever find the motivation

[airenyah]

somebody tell me brett and eddy will hate me if i don't go practice right this instant

#i have a lesson tomorrow and i haven't touched my violin since my last lesson 2 weeks ago rip #airenyah plappert #can't find the motivation to practice can't find the motivation to do homework ugh #but at least i officially left the church today which is something i've been meaning to do for a month as well #ever since i got the letter for the kirchenbeitrag #i need to practice #and then i need to go finish my uni hw #bc my easter break ends on in a few days #i have class again on tuesday rip #edit: i did it i channelled my inner ling ling and practiced