#i like that one more often i think. just being that | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

girlgenius1111 · 1 day

Text

behave

ingrid leaves for 2 weeks for national duty. sol and mapi try to stay out of trouble and fill the time. they are successful at one of those two objectives. some medical trauma discussed.

-------

“And I have an extra one of her inhalers, in the medicine cabinet in our bathroom. She hasn’t had an asthma attack in a while but-”

“-But just in case, Solstråle has one in her backpack, and you have one in the medicine cabinet. Ingrid, relax. It’s going to be fine. You’ve left the two of us before.”

“I know, but this time it's for longer, and she’s still not really herself. So many things have happened and I’m so worried,” the Norwegian rambled. It had only been a few weeks since everything had happened, and you were doing better. You were adjusting. Ingrid still didn’t really want you out of her sight, but she was due at the airport to fly back to Norway for the international break. She’d already said goodbye to you back at the house, and now she was very anxiously trying to give Mapi some words of advice before she had to go. It wasn’t the first time she’d left you with Mapi to play for Norway, but it was the first time since your mental health had really declined, since Ingrid became aware of how hard of a time you were having.

“Ingrid, amor, I know. I will take good care of her. Do you trust me?” Mapi said calmly, squeezing one of Ingrid’s hands.

“Of course, María, I’m sorry, of course I trust you. It’s just… keep an eye on her? Please?” Ingrid’s worry bled through her tone, eyes pleading with Mapi to agree to her request.

“I promise, Ingrid. We’ll be completely fine. And if we aren’t, I’ll call you.”

“Okay.” Ingrid said quietly.

“Alright. Fly safe, mi amor. I love you.” Mapi said, pulling Ingrid into a hug. Her girlfriend clung to her, and Mapi rubbed her back softly, trying to provide some comfort.

“I love you too.” Ingrid whispered, pulling back to leave a sweet kiss on her girlfriend’s lips, before turning and walking into the airport.

Mapi sighed, a bit relieved because she honestly wasn’t sure she wouldn’t be returning home with Ingrid after a failed airport drop off. The Norwegian had been increasingly anxious about you in recent weeks, and Mapi knew that leaving you, now, felt like she was failing you as a sister, and as a guardian. She also knew, however, that she had the situation handled. You were comfortable with Mapi, and she was confident in her abilities to keep an eye on you, and make sure you were doing okay.

She understood Ingrid’s anxiety. The Norwegian had always been a person who needed to feel control. Leaving her very vulnerable sister behind while she went off to play football for two weeks would certainly not give Ingrid the sense of control she craved in every situation that scared her.

Ingrid had gone, though. Entered the airport, gotten on the plane. And now it was time for Mapi to get back home to you, and begin the 2 weeks of fun she had planned.

------

Mapi wanted to bond with you, in a way that didn’t involve heavy emotions and tears being spilled. She wanted to do something fun that you enjoyed. Even if it wasn’t something that she necessarily wouldn’t have chosen. When you enthusiastically suggested that you both go to your rock climbing gym, she’d agreed easily. How hard could it be? She was a professional athlete. She was fit and strong, and she knew she could do it. She’d checked with the trainers at Barça, and she’d been cleared for the activity. An important piece of information that she’d forgotten, however, was that she wasn’t the biggest fan of heights.

Well, it wasn’t that she forgot. It was more that she just didn’t think it would be an issue. Her fear of heights had decreased significantly in recent years. She went on hikes often up tall hills and mountains, and was barely bothered. She didn’t stop to consider that being tied to a wall and climbing to the top with very little support would be harder.

It was easy to get on the helmet, the harness, and all the gear. It was adorable to watch you expertly tie the knots to her carabiner, very nonchalantly, though Mapi could tell you wanted to impress her. It was fun to learn all the silly little commands she was supposed to shout. It was fun that you knew all the right pointers to tell her, easily getting her going up the wall. It was even fun climbing; it took a specific muscle strength that was slightly different than the one she possessed, and it was just difficult enough to present a challenge, without being overwhelmingly difficult.

As she got higher up, though, she became more and more aware that the only thing between her and falling a very significant distance to the ground was a rope and a self belaying machine. She kept herself calm, though, until she got to the top of the wall. She allowed herself a small smile, glancing down at where you were cheering for her.

That was her mistake. The ground was so far away. And once she started to panic she couldn’t really stop.

You were yelling instructions up to her, ones she could barely hear.“Okay, like I told you. Flip the hand brake to the other side, and let the slack of the rope slide through your hand.”

“NO!” Mapi shouted, surprising even herself with the volume of her voice. “I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t? Is it stuck?” You replied. It didn’t even occur to you that Mapi might be scared. She was Mapi. She was fearless and confident and she was brave for you when you weren’t sure you could be.

“No, Sol, I can’t. I can’t.” Mapi said again, and you were floored to hear her start to get choked up. She had a white knuckle grip on the rope in one hand, holding tight to one of the handholds with the other. She looked like her whole body was trembling, and you floundered for a minute, entirely lost on what to do and how to help.

Though after thinking about it for another minute, the solution was clear. Ingrid could fix Mapi, just like Mapi could always fix Ingrid.

“Okay, Maps, hold on I’m gonna help you.” You shouted, seeing her nod weakly. There was no getting her down like this. You had to have some confidence in the equipment, and yourself, in order to repel down the wall, and Mapi clearly possessed confidence in neither of those things at the moment.

You grabbed your phone and called Ingrid. It went right to voicemail. You called again, waving off the worker who came up to ask if you needed help.

“I’m calling Ingrid, Mapi, just hang on.”

Ingrid didn’t answer for a second time. You dialed Caro’s number, one you had for emergencies, and she picked up on the first ring, no doubt concerned at the sight of your name on the caller ID.

“Hello?” Caro said.

“Caro, are you with Ingrid? Can you get her for me?”

“Uh… yeah. She’s in the gym, I’ll grab her. Is everything okay?”

“No, please hurry.”

It was unsettling to see Mapi this distraught, and you were absolutely flooded with guilt that you’d made her do this. She was clearly terrified and it was all your fault.

You heard some muffled voices over the phone before Ingrid’s absolutely panicked one came over the line.

“Solstråle? What is it?” She asked, beside herself with worry.

“Um. Mapi and I went to the climbing gym. And she made it to the top of the wall but now she’s… stuck.”

“Stuck? What do you mean stuck?”

“She’s too afraid to come down, I don’t know what to do.”

Ingrid fought off a smile. The mental image of Mapi stuck at the top of an indoor climbing wall, securely attached to a rope, a thick mat underneath her, in absolutely no danger at all, was comical, she couldn’t lie.

“Switch it to a video call.” She instructed, for no other reason than to get photographic evidence of this. Alexia would be getting a late birthday gift this year, in the form of this moment, framed.

You did as she asked, flipping the camera around to show Mapi up at the top of the wall. It was the shortest one in the place, and Ingrid had a very clear view of her girlfriend, holding onto the wall and the rope for dear life.

“Oh, María.” Ingrid chuckled, finding the whole situation very amusing. She took a screenshot, before you spoke and the situation became significantly less funny.

“Ingrid, I think she’s crying.” You murmured. That sobered up your sister pretty quickly. It was one thing for Mapi to be scared, and entirely another for her to be so terrified she was moved to tears. Ingrid very suddenly remembered Mapi’s fading fear of heights. Or, what was supposed to be a fading fear of heights.

“Shit. Can you get up there? With me in your pocket or something?”

You sounded almost cocky when you responded. “I could get up there with my eyes closed. It’s the easiest wall.”

Ingrid rolled her eyes. “Okay, get me up to her.”

You did as your sister asked, attaching your harness to the ropes and getting the self belay machine all set, before you slipped your sister into your pocket, and climbed up the wall, at a speed that could only be described as a sprint. It took longer than it could have, because you went slightly diagonal, trying to get as close to Mapi as you could. When you reached her, she seemed completely spaced out, every muscle in her body tensed, a few tears on her cheeks.

You pulled your phone out of your pocket, turned the volume up, and held it up so Mapi could see her girlfriend.

“María?” Ingrid said soothingly.

Mapi snapped back into herself, her head whipping around to look at the phone, and at you.

“Ingrid.” she said, relief clear in her voice.

“Hey. Are you scared?”

“No, I am staying up here for fun Ingrid.” Mapi snapped. Ingrid looked unimpressed, and Mapi mumbled an apology.

“Can you listen to what Sol tells you to do? And do it with her?”

“Isn’t there another way I can get down?” She asked in a quiet voice.

“Yeah, I can cut the rope and you’d drop right down.” You deadpanned. Mapi looked horrified at you, and you choked back a laugh.

“Solstråle, that is not nice!” Ingrid scolded. “María, my love, you are completely safe. You’re going to do what Sol says, and you’ll be back on the ground in a second, okay?”

“Okay.” Mapi agreed, glaring at you.

“See you in a sec Ingrid! If we make it down alive,” you added, tucking your sister back into your pocket before she could yell at you again.

When you spoke again, though, it was soft and encouraging, and Mapi knew that you were taking her fear seriously. It is one of those little signs that you loved her, too. You weren’t as good at saying it, having not heard it said to you for a lot of your life, but you showed it. When you’d squeeze her hand during a Barça game, knowing how hard it was for her to sit out. When you’d find a silly cat tiktok and send it to her, even though she knew you didn’t find whatever it was very funny. And now, when you talked her through the whole thing, assuring her that she’d be safe the whole time.

“It’s gonna be fine, Maps. Flip the handbrake off, and hold tight to the rope. You won’t go anywhere until you let yourself.”

Mapi found herself following your instructions without much thought. You just very clearly sounded like you knew what you were doing.

“Okay, good. Now loosen your hand on the rope, just a little. A bit will slide through and you’ll drop. The less you let go of, the slower you’ll descend.” Mapi let the rope go a bit, lowering maybe an inch. You nodded encouragingly, lowering down with her. “Keep your feet on the wall. You’re just going to walk yourself down. You can go as slow as you need to.”

Very slowly, at the pace of a wounded snail, you and Mapi moved down the wall. You didn’t stop talking the whole time, forgetting, honestly, that Ingrid was in your pocket.

She was sitting in the hallway, all the way in Norway, wondering what she did to deserve such a sweet sister, who cared so deeply for the people around her. Who adjusted to her girlfriend without a second thought. Who was sensitive and loving, even if you pretended not to be.

When Mapi got down the wall, she was still shaking too badly to undo the harness. You handed her your phone, un attaching her from the wall, as she spoke quietly to your sister. When she was free, and you were free, you shoved your face next to hers, greeting Ingrid again.

If Mapi was worried you’d make fun of her, she didn't have to be.

You just smiled at her. “Ice cream?” You asked hopefully. Mapi and Ingrid felt their lips both tug up into smiles, matching smiles.

“Definitely.” Mapi agreed.

The day had been a bonding experience. Just in a very different way than Mapi had anticipated.

------

You enjoyed spending time with Mapi, you really did. But you were also a person that needed a lot of time to yourself. Maybe it was a consequence of having no one around who paid much attention to you growing up, or maybe it was just how you were wired. Either way, after almost 2 weeks of spending every minute with your sister’s girlfriend, you needed a break.

Some silence, and a break.

Which is how you found yourself on a long hike, two days before Ingrid was due home. You’d gone yourself, without Scout, which wasn’t a common occurrence, but you wanted to be gone for a while. Just you and nature and nothing but your thoughts to echo around your head.

When you got to a fork in the path, you stopped to consider. The right path would lead you back down, and you’d be home within the hour. The left path would lead you through a tricky boulder section of the hike, and you’d be gone another 2 hours.

Your only hesitation with the left path was that Ingrid had very specifically told you not to take it alone. You’d talked to her before you’d left, and she’d warned you that the boulders were really tricky, and you shouldn’t do it by yourself. She promised to go with you when she got back, if you promised not to do it today.

Mapi would never know, though. You’d just tell her you stopped at the top to enjoy the views for a bit, before you headed down. And if Mapi didn’t know, Ingrid wouldn’t know. And you really, really, just wanted some more time to yourself.

So you set off to the left, ignoring the nagging feeling in your gut that you were making a mistake.

------

You didn’t remember it hurting this bad, having a broken bone. It was definitely broken, though. You’d heard it go, even as your body hit the ground with a loud thump.

The boulders had been tricky. So incredibly tricky. They were slightly loose and wobbly, and there were big gaps in between where you could easily fall. You had to get up and over a pile of rocks to keep moving, and you were tired. There were only a few more, by your estimations, and you were so relieved to almost be done that you were a bit more careless on the last few.

It was the final obstacle that you fell from. You lost your footing towards the end of the boulder pile, rolling and tumbling down the last boulder, and onto the dirt path. You threw your arm out to catch yourself, and that was all it took.

Sitting for a moment, you assessed your hand. It was broken. You knew instantly. You’d felt this before, you knew what it was. You felt strangely calm after making that assessment, carefully testing all of your fingers, and trying to move your wrist.

Ouch. No, it was definitely broken. You had a couple options. You could call Mapi to come get you. She’d freak out and call your sister, who would be furious that you’d done exactly what she warned you not to. Or, you could finish the hike and get home. Pretend you were tired from your hike, or sick or something, and sneak away into your bedroom. Sleep it off.

Logically, you knew the second option was bullshit. You couldn’t hide a broken arm forever. The thought of going to the doctor, though, was not something you would even consider. You only had one choice.

You rose to your feet, the movement jostling your arm just enough to make your stomach turn. You bent over, throwing up onto the path. Straightening up again, you set off down the path, arm cradled close to your body. You could do this. You were strong and independent and you didn’t need anyones help.

------

You felt like the universe was on your side, with the way things were going. Aside from the broken arm, of course. You were able to slip past Mapi, telling her a small lie that you’d grabbed food on the way home and weren’t feeling well, before you made it to your room. She popped her head in to say goodnight, and if she thought your behavior was weird, she didn’t say anything.

You waited until she was in bed to shower, knowing she’d be up early for training the next day. You weren’t quite sure what your plan was past that, but you were taking this step by step.

If Mapi didn’t know, she wouldn’t make you go to the doctor. She wouldn’t tell Ingrid. And Ingrid wouldn’t be mad.

It was very poor logic, but logic nonetheless.

You probably could have kept it up for longer, too, if your damn dog wasn’t so intelligent.

------

Scout wasn’t sure what a broken bone was. Nor was he sure what was wrong with you. But you were hurting, had cried yourself to sleep the night before, and no one was doing anything. The helpful tall one was gone, leaving him with only the annoying and loud short one. Scout didn't think she was very smart, but he’d try to get the message across that someone should probably do something about you, his favorite person on planet earth.

He followed her around when she arrived home from training. She ignored him.

When she sat on the couch and turned the TV on, he stood right next to her, staring daggers at her face. She ignored him.

It wasn’t until he started to whine loudly, and paw at her hand that she got fed up and finally looked at him.

“Scout, chico, I am begging you to leave me alone.” Mapi sighed. The dog just looked at her, taking a tiny step closer to the Spaniard and letting out a quiet whine. “I swear to god.”

She stood from the couch, heading for your room. If Scout would listen to anyone, it would be you. And she assumed that he was just pouting because you had shut your door, not allowing him inside. Now that Mapi thought about it, though, she realized she hadn’t seen you at all today, though she had exchanged texts with you while she was at training. Upon arriving at your door she raised her hand to knock, but before her hand could make contact with the wood, she heard a quiet, pained yelp come from the room.

Mapi frowned. “Nena?” She called, knocking on the door before trying to knob.

It was locked.

You never locked your door.

Mapi paused for a moment, looking down at Scout next to her, who was panting and staring up at her. See, his eyes seemed to say. I told you something was wrong.

“Solstråle? Can I come in?”

Inside, you had clapped your good hand over your mouth, realizing that Mapi had heard the sound you’d made. You’d been trying to pull a sweatshirt on to hide the awful sight of your arm, but even the soft brush of the fabric against your arm was horribly painful.

Fuck. Fuck. Mapi wasn’t going to go away, not without seeing you. You struggled with the sweatshirt further before responding, but you were unable to muffle a cry of pain when your forearm twisted slightly.

You shut your eyes, fighting back tears. “I’m fine, Mapi.” You replied, though you knew very well that it would not be enough for the Spaniard.

“You don’t sound fine.” Mapi said, twisting the knob again, as if it would have magically unlocked itself in the last few seconds.

“I am. All good.” You said back, fighting against the urge to open the door and collapse into her arms; your arm was on fire, the pain so bad that you were barely keeping yourself from openly sobbing.

On the other side of the door, Mapi shook her head, growing more and more panicked. You didn’t sound right, not at all. Scout next to her had begun to pace, and she was trying to figure out if she could break the door down before she spoke again.

“Open the door, nena. I am not asking. I need to see that you’re safe.” Mapi said firmly, closing her eyes and praying to god that you were okay.

You had no choice. You stepped forward, unlocking the door, and Mapi’s eyes fell to you, cradling your arm close to your chest. You arm that looked wrong. It was bent at a slightly awkward angle, turning an ugly shade of purple, and it was twice the size of how it normally was.

“Jesus.” Mapi sighed, stepping closer to you, she missed the pure panic that flashed across your face, but she saw you flinch violently away from her, backing up until you were on the opposite side of the room. There were tears in your eyes, and Mapi froze, raising her hands in the air.

“Sol,” Mapi began, her heart shattering when you shook your head rapidly, wordlessly begging for something, although Mapi wasn’t quite sure what. “It’s just me, Sol. I won’t touch your arm. I just want to look at it, okay? I promise, I will not touch you.”

You blinked at her for a minute, before nodding slowly. You moved over to your bed, taking a seat on the edge, sitting rather stiffly. It was a testament to the trust you had in the Spaniard that you held your arm out for her to see, a quiet sob falling from your lips.

Mapi moved closer slowly, like you were a wild animal she didn’t want to scare off, until she was standing right in front of you. She kept her hands behind her back, simply looking at your arm. It was broken. Mapi wasn’t a doctor, but this wasn’t a difficult determination to make. A broken arm is pretty obvious.

“What happened?”

“I fell.”

“How did you fall?”

“I was hiking along those rocks that Ingrid told me not to climb on and I lost my balance and fell on my arm.”

“This was yesterday?” Mapi breathed, sick to her stomach at the thought that you’d been hiding this from her for so long. That you’d been hiding it at all, but that you’d gone to sleep with an untreated broken bone, that she’d left you alone while she went to training, while you had a broken bone.

“Yeah.”

“Oh, cariño.” She sighed. “You must be in so much pain.” She studied you closely, and she decided that now was not the time to have a conversation about hiding things from her. “Nena, do you want a hug?”

Now that she knew, it was even harder to pretend that you were fine. She was right. You had been in a lot of pain. You were acutely aware of that pain, now, and how desperately you wanted someone to take charge of the situation and make everything okay.

“Please,” you whispered, leaning in her direction. Mapi very carefully wrapped her arms around you, gently rubbing her hand up and down your back. You trembled against her, and Mapi thought at that moment that she would break her own arm if it meant you weren’t in pain.

Mapi hugged you tight for a minute before she very regretfully pulled back, putting her hands on her shoulders and studying you. “Okay. Okay. Here is what we’re going to do. Tomorrow, we are going to have a talk about hiding injuries from us. Because Sol, this is so dangerous. I don’t know why you didn’t tell me, and you can explain later, but right now we need to go see a doctor.”

“No.” You said simply, your face hardening as you looked up at the Spaniard. And it wasn’t that Mapi hadn’t expected some resistance; she knew that you had an issue with doctors. It was the decisiveness with which you spoke, and the barely masked fright on your face.

“Solstråle, we need to get that x-rayed.”

“No. It’s fine, Mapi.”

“It isn’t fine! It looks broken, nena, we need to get it looked at.”

“No. No doctors, no hospital, no x-ray.”

“Solstråle, I will call your sister if I need to. We are going to the doctor.”

A look of betrayal flashed across our face, and you held your arm tighter to your body in a protective manner. “Please don’t make me.” You whispered.

Harsh wasn’t working. Demanding wasn’t working. Mapi knew she couldn’t force you. She just had to convince you. She stepped closer, putting a comforting hand on your shoulder. “You are scared, that’s okay. I’ll be with you the whole time, though, nena. Do you trust me?”

“Yeah.” You said, your voice cracking a bit, looking up at Mapi with wide, wet eyes.

“I promise you, I am not going to let anything happen to you.”

You considered for a moment. You knew, realistically, that you had to go in. And you also knew that Ingrid was probably going to be furious with you. You craved comfort from your sister, though, you needed to hear her voice, telling you that you were safe. Ingrid knew a bit more than Mapi did about your issue with doctors, even though she didn’t have the full story. Ingrid was safe, and so was Mapi, but you really just wanted your sister.

“Can I call Ingrid on the way there?”

And even though Mapi winced internally at mere thought of how upset this would make her girlfriend, she nodded. “Of course you can. Come on, let’s go.”

The care with which Mapi helped you down the stairs brought tears to your eyes. She put your shoes on for you, double knotting the laces like you always did, before she paused, crouched in front of where you sat on the bench by the front door.

“I promise you, Sol. I am not going to let anything happen to you. Okay? I’ve got you, kid.” She said, watching as you blinked hard, clenching your jaw and nodding.

“Yeah, thanks,” you murmured, your voice barely audible. Mapi helped you up, then, and you both exited the house.

Mapi dialed the phone in the car, connecting it to the speaker. Ingrid picked up on the first ring, almost like she knew something was wrong. “Hi mi amor,” she greeted warmly.

“Hola. We’re in the car, Sol is with me.”

“Hi solstråle,” Ingrid said.

“Hi,” you replied, not uttering another word.

“Tell her what happened, mi sol.” Mapi encouraged

“Tell me what? What happened?” Ingrid asked, her tone much more concerned and serious.

“I hurt my arm. We’re going to the doctor.” You mumbled. Ingrid sighed, but she got the feeling that this wasn’t the worst of what you had to tell her, that it was going to get worse.

“How? What’s wrong with it?”

“I was hiking and I fell. Mapi thinks it’s broken.”

“Broken…climbing… on the trail I told you to be careful on- wait, Sol that was yesterday. This happened yesterday!?” Ingrid shouted. “Why are you just taking her now, María?”

Mapi winced. “I didn’t know until now.”

“YOU DIDN’T TELL MAPI UNTIL NOW?” Ingrid yelled, so loudly that the speakers crackled slightly.

Mapi glanced over at you to see that there were tears pouring down your cheeks, and your bottom lip captured in between your teeth, as you tried valiantly not to cry. Shit.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. Relax, let’s all just take a breath.” She soothed, turning to pull over on a side street.

“María, I will not relax, this is not oka-”

“Ingrid, stop.” Mapi said firmly, her voice more stern than you’d ever heard it. Ingrid fell silent. “Sol, breathe. Ingrid isn’t mad, she’s just worried. We are okay, everything is okay.”

You nodded frantically, trying to get a handle on your emotions, which were, frankly, overwhelming at the moment. “Sorry, I’m sorry Ingrid, I’m so sorry.” You sobbed.

Ingrid felt her heart shatter. She hadn’t meant to shout. “No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled, honey.”

“I just- the last time I hurt my arm mom didn’t believe me and you told me to be careful and I didn’t want you to be mad, and I didn’t know if you’d think I was lying, and I don’t want to go to the doctor, Ingrid, but Mapi is taking me and she says I have to, and-” you cut yourself off with another loud sob, before arms were reaching over the center console and wrapping around you.

“Shh, nena, it’s okay. You are safe, you are loved. You are okay.” Mapi whispered, loud enough that Ingrid could hear it over the phone. Tears were falling down her cheeks, too, for a combination of reasons. Mostly, though, because her girlfriend was being so absurdly sweet and patient with you. Not that María would ever be anything different, but Ingrid would never stop appreciating it.

Once you’d calmed down a bit, you leaned back away from Mapi, looking at her desperately. “María I really don’t want to go to the doctor, please don’t make me,” you begged. Even as everything in Mapi wanted to give in and take you home where you felt safe, her eyes flickered down to your arm, which was black and blue and swollen, and she knew that wasn’t an option. Before she could speak, though, Ingrid chimed in.

“Solstråle, switch the phone to a video call and let me see your arm.”

You did as she asked, fighting back another wave of tears when Ingrid’s face popped up on the screen, looking sympathetically at you. You held up your arm, holding back a groan of pain as you did so, not happy when Ingrid frowned at the sight.

“Sweetheart,”

“No,” you cried, hiding your face in the crook of your elbow. This was absurd. Your arm was clearly broken, you were 18 years old, and you were afraid of the doctor. Like a child. It was humiliating and you wanted nothing more than to pretend that this was fine, that you were fine going to get a few x-rays and a cast, but the feelings of anxiety and panic were only rising in you again, and your whole body shook at the thought of letting a doctor anywhere near your arm.

“I know, I know,” Ingrid whispered, sounding like she really did know. While your parents had always dismissed your fear of doctors as you being dramatic, ingrid had always been able to tell that you were completely and utterly terrified of going in for a check up, or going into the hospital. The pure horror in your eyes whenever you had to do so was proof enough, but she’d had to take you once, just to get your flu shot, and you’d silently cried the entire way to the office, thrown up in the bathroom upon arriving, and almost broke her hand with your strong grip while the shot was being administered.

You hadn’t always been like this, though. It had started when you were 10, and Ingrid had never known the reason. You’d never told her, and your parents hadn’t either.

“You’re scared, yes? Can you tell me what is making you so afraid?” Ingrid asked gently.

You took a few shuddering breaths before hesitantly looking at her on the screen. “When I broke my arm? They had to reset it because mom waited to take me to the doctor and the bones were in the wrong spot.

They told me they were going to put some ice on it and a bandage and then the nurses were holding me down and the doctor was forcing the bones back into place.”

You took a minute, trying to stop the incessant shakes that were running through your body at the memory. You jumped slightly when Mapi’s hand found your uninjured one, but you grabbed on tight, closing your eyes to finish your explanation.

“I cried and I screamed and mom told me to stop being dramatic, and that I was embarrassing her in front of all the doctors. They made her leave the room then, and it was just me and the doctor and the nurses. The bones didn’t go back right on the first try, and they had to do it two more times before it worked. Mom only came in when they were done and they were putting the cast on. I asked her if I could call you, and she said no, because you were too busy for me.”

It all made sense, now. Ingrid remembered coming back from international duty after you’d broken your arm. You’d seemed so depressed and withdrawn, and she’d assumed you were upset about the injury. Never could she have imagined what had gone on while she was gone.

“That is awful, nena. You did not deserve that, and I am so sorry that happened to you.” Mapi began, her voice softer than you’d ever heard it. “I understand why you’re scared. I promise you, though, I won’t let anyone touch you until you say it’s okay. They’ll tell you what they’re going to do before they do it, and I’ll be with you the whole time.”

Your sister could tell that you were slightly more convinced, now. You really trusted Mapi. She’d never given you a reason not to trust her.

“Solstråle, you really need to get it looked at. I’m sorry I’m not there, I’m sorry I wasn’t there the first time, but Mapi is going to take really good care of you, okay?”

“Okay.” You agreed, another tear sliding down your cheek. Even as you did so, though, even as you gave Mapi permission to start the car and resume the drive to the hospital, you weren’t sure you could do this. You understood the importance of getting your arm taken care of, and you’d try. Whether you’d get through this hospital trip, though, was a different story.

--------

Mapi was relatively sure she was going to need an x-ray herself; you were holding her hand so tightly, your knuckles were white. You were shaking in the hospital bed, a vacant expression on your face.

You’d been sort of… despondent since returning from your x-ray. The doctors had insisted you go alone, and after some convincing, you’d agreed. When they walked you back into the room where Mapi was waiting, though, it was clear you were in another place. All she could do was wait for you to come back a bit.

“Mapi?” You said quietly, getting the attention of the Spaniard, who had been looking down at her phone, texting your sister.

“Sí nena?” Mapi replied, very gently squeezing your hand. You looked at her, then, making eye contact for the first time since returning from x-rays, and Mapi winced at the terror in your eyes.

“I don’t feel safe.” You whispered, unsure of what else you could do or say. You needed help, your fear was rapidly becoming overwhelming, especially because you knew that any minute, the doctor would be returning.

Mapi nodded sympathetically, reaching out with her free hand to push some hair off your forehead. She knew that physical touch was often the only thing that could comfort you when you were feeling anxious. “Is there anything I can do to make you feel more safe?”

“Promise you won’t leave? You won’t let them hurt me?”

“I will stay right here with you the whole time. And I will never let anyone hurt you.” Mapi looked at you with such conviction, spoke with such confidence and finality, you had no choice but to believe her.

“I want to go home.” You whimpered, your voice cracking.

“Soon, mi sol. Soon.”

It was only a few minutes later that the doctor returned. She was a kind woman, gentle and cautious. She had some understanding that you were afraid, and she’s respected that. She told you everything she was going to do before she did it, and she hadn’t once made you feel ridiculous for how you were acting.

“Alrighty. Got your x rays here. We’re looking at a bilateral forearm fracture, which means both the radius and the ulna are broken. The fractured are clean across, nothing is displaced which is good news for you; that means we can put the cast on, and nothing has to get put back into place.”

Mapi watched as your body practically deflated next to her, a long sigh of relief escaping your lips.

The doctor continued. “I am curious, though. Have you broken this arm before?”

You stiffened slightly, and Mapi shifted next to you, moving closer unconsciously in a protective manner.

“Yeah, when I was 10.”

The doctor nodded. “I can see it on the x-ray, there’s a line here, where it didn't heal exactly right. That white dot? You’ve developed a bit of a bone spur there where the bones weren’t properly aligned the first time. Does it give you pain?”

You shrugged. The relief was gone from your face, and you only looked defensive now. “Sometimes.”

Mapi guessed that sometimes meant often, and she wondered if you ever would have told her and Ingrid that you were having issues with your arm, if this hadn’t occurred.

“Well, the good news is your bones are not at risk for healing in the wrong spot, so you should avoid a repeat of the first injury complications. There are options, though, if that bone spur continues to give you issues. Physical therapy, steroid injections, and surgery are all on the table.”

You nodded, jaw clenched tightly shut. Mapi could tell this wasn’t a conversation you wanted to have, and she figured you’d been pushed far enough today.

“Thank you, very much. What is the recovery time like?” She said, effectively drawing the attention away from you as the conversation turned to casts and braces and slings.

You might as well have been in another room, for all you heard. You didn’t need to get the bones reset. Just a cast. You could handle that.

Or, you thought you could. It was much more stress-inducing than you expected, when the doctor came in with the items to make the cast, and reached for your arm. You flinched away from her violently, looking helplessly at Mapi. You were thinking about how she said she wouldn’t let anyone touch you if you didn’t want them to, and Mapi knew that.

“Can you give her a second, please?” Mapi said, not taking her eyes off of you as she slid into the hospital bed you were sitting upright in.

The doctor nodded, for her part lacking understanding, but not needing an explanation to respect that you were clearly terrified.

“Sol, breathe. It’s just the cast. They’re gonna put it on, they aren’t going to mess with your arm. You can do this, I know you can.” Mapi encouraged, more than a little surprised when you took a deep breath, nodded, and held your arm out to the doctor.You turned your head away, pressing your face into Mapi’s shoulder, gripping onto her shirt with your good hand.

You were putting all of your trust in Mapi in that moment, to ensure that the doctor was gentle and didn’t do anything she hadn’t said she would. This wasn’t lost on the Spaniard, and she watched closely as they wrapped your arm, and began applying the plaster.

She could feel your tears soaking through the fabric of her shirt, though you were completely silent as you cried. Not for the first time, and probably not for the last time, Mapi cursed your mother with everything in her. The woman had given her Ingrid, and you by extension, but she had inflicted so much pain on you in your short life. Mapi ached for the day where these scars weren’t painfully obvious, for the day you could go to the doctor without fear, ask for a hug when you needed one, cry openly when you were hurting, believe with all your heart that you were loved.

She held tight to you, watching as the doctor put the finishing touches on your cast.

“I’ve got you, nena.” She whispered. “Almost done.”

You were too good to have experienced everything that you had. She just wanted you to be happy.

When you pulled away from her to inspect your arm, she could still see such apprehension written clearly across your face. She wondered how long it would take for it to fully leave. Or if it ever would. Some scars never faded.

You gave her a watery smile, though, nodding towards the blue of your cast. “Couldn’t get it blaugrana but this is good too, right?” You joked.

Mapi returned your smile, feeling a very familiar spark of hope inside of her chest. Of course you would be okay. Of course you would. You were one of the strongest, most resilient people she knew.

“Very good. I am going to draw something so inappropriate on there before your sister gets home.”

You laughed, and Mapi laughed, both of you felt a bit like everything would be okay. Even if Ingrid scribbled over whatever Mapi drew on your cast.

-------

You sat blankly on the couch upon arriving home, staring at the cast your hand was wrapped in. You weren’t really sure what to do now, and it didn’t seem like Mapi knew, either. She took a seat next to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into her.

“Talk to me, nena.” She encouraged.

“I just don’t feel good. I’m really tired.” You told her.

“It’s been a long day, your body is coming down from a lot of stress and anxiety. You’re okay, now, so let’s just lay on the couch and relax, sí?”

You agreed, shifting to move into your spot in the corner of the sectional, before you paused. “Can you stay with me?” You asked.

Mapi smiled at you. “Of course I can. Even if it means your damn dog is going to come lay on my legs and get fur all over my pants.”

You rolled your eyes goodnaturedly, but you couldn’t give much of an argument because Scout jumped up on the couch right after, flopping down on your legs, making sure to stretch a leg out to rest on Mapi’s legs, too.

You dozed off relatively easily, clearly drained from a very emotionally and physically exhausting day, and Mapi took the opportunity to call her girlfriend, who she had been updating over text frequently, but who would still be, no doubt, beside herself with worry.

When Ingrid answered the phone, and only Mapi’s face appeared in view of the camera, Ingrid half convinced herself that you’d locked yourself in a room somewhere and were refusing to come out. Mapi shifted the camera, though, showing you absolutely passed out on the couch, your uninjured hand holding onto her arm, something you’d done completely in your sleep.

“Hey.” Mapi greeted. She didn’t worry about the volume of her voice; you could sleep through anything.

“Hi.” Ingrid said, feeling ridiculously emotional at the sight of her two favorite people together. “She’s okay?”

“Yeah. It was really hard for her, I’ve never seen her that anxious. They just put a cast on, though, and she’s relaxed enough now to rest. She was so exhausted, Ingrid, I’d be surprised if she slept at all last night.” Mapi paused as Ingrid hummed. The Norwegian could tell her girlfriend was upset, just from the way her mouth was set stiffly, and the way her eyebrows furrowed slightly.

“How are you doing my love? That must have been really hard to see.” She commented, studying Mapi’s expression closely.

The Spaniard just shrugged, though. “I am sorry this happened, I know how worried you must have been being so far away.”

Ingrid shook her head. “Don’t do that, don’t try to distract me. I want to know how you are doing.”

Mapi nibbled on her lip for a moment, her eyes everywhere but on the phone in front of her. “I am so sorry Ingrid.” She said finally, the phone dropping into her lap as she wiped impatiently at her eyes. Ingrid had to be furious with her. Had to be. This was all Mapi’s fault, after all.

Of course, Ingrid had never considered blaming Mapi, not for a single minute. “No, baby, this isn’t your fault.” She said, as if she’d read her girlfriends mind. Mapi could only scoff. “I’m serious, María. These things happen, it’s no one's fault.”

“She didn’t tell me. She didn’t trust me enough to tell me.” Mapi whispered.

Ingrid frowned. “No, she trusts you. It’s complicated with her, when she’s hurt. You heard what she said about when she broke her arm the first time. Her response to being hurt was completely based on that experience, it had nothing to do with you.”

Everything Ingrid said was so logical, Mapi had a hard time coming up with a counter argument. She wasn’t quite ready to forgive herself, though, so she changed the subject.

“You come home tomorrow.” She said, a small smile gracing her lips.

Ingrid let the very obvious subject change go in favor of smiling back at her girlfriend. “I do. I’ve missed you both so much.”

“I have to make sure to sign Sol’s cast before you get here.” Mapi said thoughtfully.

Ingrid grew pale at the thought. “No, María, whatever you are planning to put on there please, please don’t. Just write your name.”

“Oh, my name will be on there.” Mapi smirked.

Well, at least it didn’t seem like she was planning something explicit. “Leave room for me to sign too.” Ingrid said grumpily.

Mapi almost jumped when you chimed in from next to her, throat slightly scratchy. “Ingrid signs first. Those are the rules.” You mumbled, barely opening your eyes to address your sister when Mapi tilted the phone towards you.

“Ha!” Ingrid said, looking very pleased with herself.

Mapi wanted to argue, she really did. She knew, though, that Ingrid felt insecure about her relationship with you. You were a bit more open with Mapi, a bit more outwardly trusting. Mapi knew this was just because she normally had a much softer approach, though Ingrid’s tougher one was definitely necessary. She knew, too, that Ingrid worried a lot that you preferred Mapi to your sister. So, she let this one go.

“Fine. I don’t need to sign it. I’ve already got that number 4 tattooed on you.”

Ingrid paled. “No. No you didn’t. María Pilar León Cebrian, no you did not.”

“She did. It’s huge, on my right ass cheek.” Next to you, Mapi stifled her laughter, and you did your best to keep a straight face.

“You better be kidding. I swear to god if I get off that airplane and you have a four tattooed on your ass I will kill you both right there.”

“How are you going to check? Are you going to pants me in the airport?” You laughed.

“Solstråle,” Ingrid began, her teeth clenched.

“Relaaaax Ingrid. I don’t have any more tattoos,”

She let out a sigh of relief. “Thank god.”

“...Yet.” You added, laughing with Mapi when Ingrid brought the phone closer to her face.

“NO! No, Solstråle, no no no no no.”

You and Mapi laughed so hard you could barely breathe, hearing Ingrid repeating no over and over.

Ingrid rolled her eyes, but she wasn’t annoyed, not really. You were laughing and that was a big change from before. You were on the road to recovery, and you looked adorable all curled up next to Mapi, grinning at your sister through the phone. How could she be upset at your [stupid, idiotic, immature] joke?

Though she really would murder her girlfriend if you had another tattoo when she got home.

-------

this took me an absolutely absurd amount of time.

hope you enjoy sol <3

ps. please tell me all your sol thoughts comments keep me living and breathing 🫶🏻🫶🏻

#woso x reader #woso imagine #woso one shot #woso fanfics #ingrid engen x mapí leon #ingrid engen x reader #mapi leon x reader #engen!reader #platonic reader #🍓☀️

633 notes · View notes

cripplecharacters · 2 days

Text

Does Your Scarred Character Have to Hate Themself?

[large text: Does Your Scarred Character Have to Hate Themself?]

(TLDR: no. literally no.)

A frequent topic that shows up around facial differences is the self-hatred, self-disgust, self-insert-negative-emotion that we must surely experience. I want to ask* writers without FDs - why? Why do you feel about us in such a way that that's the most common way of depicting us?

*- rhetorical question. I promise I know the answers, but I'm not sure if writers do.

It's frankly worrying to me. Is it really that common to assume that disabled people have this internal, never-ending hatred for themselves? The overwhelming majority of us don't. We hate inaccessibility, when people stare, or some symptoms when they get in the way, or how expensive being disabled is, but I find the concept of us being so completely disturbed by our own disabilities extremely strange. It’s “tragedy porn” intersecting “most basic ableism”.

“But trauma!”

[large text: “But trauma!”]

Trauma of what! People with facial differences don't have some sort of default trauma that we come with like it’s a factory setting. We are a group of people with tens of thousands of stories and experiences!

“Trauma of experiencing ableism/disfiguremisia” - that's better, at least this means something. If you're writing a story about this, please get a sensitivity reader with a facial difference. You can assume how we feel all you want, but in my experience these assumptions are often bizarre and unrealistic. Or just end up writing the same “disability so sad” sob story that everyone has seen a billion times. If you want to write about disfiguremisia, you need to understand the nuance and have more than just the basic level knowledge (which 99% of people don’t have either). If you can’t do that, don’t write about it. Simple as that.

“Trauma of the accident” - thankfully, the accident is an event and a facial difference is a disability. If you want to connect these two like they're one and the same, you're almost surely going to demonize disability. People with traumatic spinal cord injuries, acquired amputees, people with TBI, people with acquired facial differences - we participate in our communities, we have hobbies, we date, we play with our dogs. Disability isn't a death sentence. Media who make it feel like it is certainly don't help people who do suddenly become disabled, don't you think?

Here's a post by @blindbeta about blind characters becoming blind through trauma that’s better made than anything I could hope to write here. I heavily recommend giving it a read.

And, I can't stress this enough - most of us didn't have “the accident”, most of us are born like this! "Traumatic scars" isn't the only facial difference that exists, far from it, it's only one of thousands. It's 99% of our representation and "representation". If you want to make a character with FD - please consider that we aren't a monolith. Just like not all physical disabilities are "wheelchair user with paralysis", not all facial differences are "traumatic scar with somehow no nerve damage".

The overrepresentation of it is incredibly telling, and sometimes - or very frequently - feels like the writer doesn’t actually even want to deal with us. They want to use our disability as a way to cheap drama, moral metaphors, tragic backstories. Not to represent us as living people who are much more similar to you than you apparently think.

Now, I do have enough awareness to know that that's a big part of the appeal. “Horrific Thing #2456 happens” and boom, instant drama! Of course, it's a reasonable response that they would hide their disability for years, avoid talking about it in any way, and magically change their personality to be mean and reclusive, or at least be constantly soooo sad about how much it sucks to be disabled, right?

Do I really need to say that having your character becoming disabled be the worst thing ever is ableism 101? We have been talking about this for so long at this point. Writing about the process of adapting to a specific disability is better left to people who have actual experience in it.

To give an example that will hopefully resonate more with Tumblr users, I will use the fact that I'm also gay. It's not perfect by any means but probably much more familiar territory.

Imagine, let's say, a character. He's gay. The story he's in is supposedly progressive, certainly not trying to be homophobic. The character has experienced an incident, maybe an act of aggression or a hate crime, that happened because he’s gay, which was traumatic. Happens IRL, sure. So of course the character starts hating being gay. He talks about how gross and disgusting it is, he never lets anyone know that he could be “one of them”, certainly not take a stance against homophobia. You can't mention him without mentioning the accident, they're seemingly fused together. No gay love, joy, even basic happiness, he would actually choose to be straight in a heartbeat if given the option to and complains that he can't. This is shown as a neutral, obvious thing that a gay man would do, no one comments on it. He stays like this the whole time, unless there’s a plot twist in the last 10 pages where the world is now magically perfect ("we fixed discrimination, yay!"). This is the only LGBT character in the story.

Keep in mind that there are people similar to this in real life, living with extreme internalized homophobia.

Is this, in your opinion, realistic and thoughtful representation? How does it feel when written by a cishet writer, versus a gay writer who is recalling his experiences? Do you think that it's reasonable for the majority of media representation to be like this, or very close to it? How would it affect younger gay people who might already be uncomfortable with being queer? Are gay men the target audience, or are they not even considered as a group of people who read books? Is this helping or damaging the general public's idea of how it is to be gay? Why or why not?

The Masterpiece

[large text: The Masterpiece]

From 13 to 19 of May, we are celebrating Face Equality week (what a coincidence!). It’s important to me in general - and I wish it was more important to abled people, but I digress - especially its theme for this year.

“My Face is a Masterpiece”

Great statement, it represents the community well, I do enjoy how bold it is. Very cool stuff, I love the work our advocates are doing!

But why do I bring this up?

Well, to very non-subtly show that we aren’t a self-hating group of people. We are a community, a community saying “our faces are beautiful, look!”, we are saying “treat us equally, and do it now!”. Our activism isn’t about self-disgust. It’s about fighting your-disgust.

Why can’t writers keep up? Why are you still stuck decades behind?

Is this the only reason I bring it up?

The Call to Celebration

[large text: The Call to Celebration]

FEI, the org behind organizing it, asks a very simple question (emphasis mine):

“Why do we so often see stories about facial difference as a ‘tragedy’, when they should be about triumph?” “Calling all artists, allies, creatives, galleries. You can rewrite the story to bring about #FaceEquality and celebrate the unique artistry found in every face. Your participation this #FaceEqualityWeek will help to tell the real story, that there is a masterpiece in every face.”

Here. We are calling for you to stop. Directly from the biggest international advocacy alliance group that's out there. If you create, this is for you.

The last argument to not have your character with a facial difference hate themselves? Because we don’t want this. We are tired and frustrated. For me personally, I’m also offended by this kind of assumption. We aren’t tragedies or cheap entertainment for abled people to pity or be horrified by. We are people, and if you can’t internalize that, you have no reason to write about us.

For once, celebrate us. Happy Face Equality Week!

mod Sasza

#mod sasza #face difference #ableism #disfiguremisia #face equality week #my face is a masterpiece #writing guide #writing help #writeblr #writing resources #writing advice #writing tips #writing characters #how to write #writing disabled characters #writing disability

600 notes · View notes

venusplan · 2 days

Note

Do you think you could write like a Heian era Sukuna x a very sick! reader? Like reader coughs up blood and sometimes can't even feed themselves. Please and thank you!! Much love 💕💗🧷🎀

a/n :: my first anon :0 tysm! ofc I can. I love Sukuna sm (all my babies are gone)

tw — blood, very sick reader, soft Sukuna(he'd murder us in a heartbeat), fem!reader(sorryyy), fluff + angst!!

It's told that Sukuna has never had a wife or kids. Though that much is true. Though it's not like he didn't think about marrying a specific person. That person being you. Though, unluckily you had fallen sick. The first signs weren't all that bad. You'd cough every so often. Then blood started to appear. Coughing became hacking. Non-stop coughing and wheezing at night

Sukuna had noticed the signs before but you reassured hm it was nothing, and you just didn't feel good and that it would go away. It didn't and it got worse. The moment he noticed how sick you had fallen he didn't try to leave your side much. Though it was only so far so he could protect you. Truthfully, no one had known of your place with him.

He wanted to keep you safe and protected, until he couldn't. He figured one of maids were sick and caused your sickness. So he killed them all, but not just the maids. The cooks, anyone you could practically be around. New people would come and fill their shoes.

Sometimes he would come into your chambers, having Uraume bringing your food on a sliver platter. Truthfully he never knew what dish would be your last, or if you maybe somehow over come it. Which doesn't seem likely.

He shared every part of his life with you. Just like how you shared yours. Truthfully he loves you, though it was more by actions than words. He wouldn't admit to crying in front of you, hiding it. Not like ever did cry, right?

But maybe he did when you finally passed.

Maybe he did treat you with more kindness than he ever did. You were more than just a weak human. You were his, maybe more weaker than any of the others. But he had a strong like towards you. Was able to tolerate you.

Sometimes he missed your annoying yapping, the annoying look in your eye when he would look at you. The way you smelt, the way you treated. Maybe he did, but he'd never admit that. You were like his secret.

His love, his most everything. Maybe he did miss you, but he'd never say it out loud.

#sukuna #sukuna ryomen #ryomen sukuna #ryomen sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna x you #sukuna ryomen x reader #jjk sukuna #sukuna fluff #jujustu kaisen #jjk #sukuna headcanons #ryomen sukuna fluff #sukuna hcs #ryomen sukuna headcanons #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x reader #jjk fluff #character x reader #sukuna x you

354 notes · View notes

pinkiemachine · 3 days

Text

I’ve only done some light reading on Selina, but even so, details on her past seem few and far between. Maybe there’s a reason, maybe I just haven’t looked hard enough, whatever. Someone can enlighten me in the comments. What I do know, however, is that she’s eluded to have experienced some form of abuse as a child. Now, this research came on the heels of brushing up on the rest of Batman’s rogues’ gallery and I gotta say, abuse as a backstory comes up a lot. And I’m just sitting here, like, “There are so many unique people in this world with unique traumas and hurts that this feels almost cookie cutter.” Am I wrong? I just wanna be more specific and explore problems more intimately. So… Selina Kyle. What to write for her backstory? I thought a lot about who she is as a character present day—her playful aloofness, her decision to become a cat burglar, breaking rules as if they don’t exist, always on the run, never settling down with anyone long term, stealing nice things for herself—it led me to this backstory: When Selina was a child, she was horribly neglected. Her father was almost never around and her mother was depressed, anxious, under the influence of alcohol quite often, and wished she never had a daughter. Selina found that it was always easier to live as though she were invisible. If she never got caught making a mess or being noisy or causing problems, her mother would never get mad at her, or even a acknowledge her, and neither would her father if he ever showed his face. She never received birthday gifts—or if she did, they were pitiful—and all of her attempts of reaching out via gifts to her mother and father were rejected. She was never loved and grew to believe that the only way she would ever feel cared for is if she just took care of herself and only herself. She was good at being invisible, and so she became good at stealing. She treated herself to nice things whenever she felt like it, and she rarely ever got caught. She never made close friends. She never really fell in love. She built up walls so high that no one could ever break them down… until she met Bruce. Suddenly, here was a guy who could consistently catch her red-handed. Who told her she needed to stop robbing people. Who believed she could be better. Who saw her. And even though she kept double-crossing him, escaping his grasp, and escaping justice, she found that it was a little bit harder to return to crime every time. She had always found him attractive… but the longer they chased each other around Gotham, and the longer he showed that he wasn’t going to ignore her or give up on her, the more that attraction turned into a deep feeling that Selina had never felt before. True love. She was scared of it. She didn’t know what to do with it. It was completely the opposite of everything she had ever known, and she secretly didn’t think she deserved it. After all, she was a criminal. She was a “bad guy.” Someone who stole from others for pleasure and profit. And yet Bruce believed she was a good person deep down. He believed she had the capacity for change. And in time, he would find himself falling in love with her too. By the end of their story, naturally, those walls had come crumbling down and they had each learned how to love again, something they both thought would never happen to them. 💜

#fan art #art #dc #dc comics #batman #Bruce wayne #Selina Kyle #Catwoman #batxcat

337 notes · View notes

dduane · 2 days

Note

Hello! Love your work, life-long fan, etc. etc. But I am here today on a mission and wondering if you could help. My nibling (who is unsure if "niece" and other gendered concepts is right for them) is turning 7 this week and is TERRIFIED of black holes. Can't sleep, can't enjoy the night sky, is-getting-picked-on-at-school bad. I'm hoping to introduce her to Fred, but I think if I start at "so there these things called white holes which kind of are "opposite" black holes," I might have a whole new problem to explain to my sister.

So as I dream up what a "nice" black hole would be all about - How was Fred as a black hole? What would such an entropically-interesting entity like a black hole even look like as a wizard? Have people with melanoheliophobia reached out to you before/Do you have any expert advice?

Thanks for all that you do to help change the landscape for anxious, nerdy people!!

Let me go talk to Fred.

***

"It was a good while ago, you know?" he says.

("He" is an approximation of the most extreme kind, here. Most astronomical entities above the Planetary level have no idea whatsoever what gender is about, or what it's good for. And even at the Planetary level they're often none too sure what it means for biologicals.)

Anyway. When you're in Timeheart, even when only visiting, it's hard to avoid the sense of everything you're discussing being in the nature of a game you won; or a test you passed and don't have to deal with further except as an amused memory. But then, in that most central of states on the far side of physicality, all games are won. All tests are passed. This is where you choose the next challenge. As for past ones...?

"It seems straightforward," Fred says, "when you're a black hole. More and more stuff accretes to you. At first, it's just your job, right? But then it starts to become more, and you slowly start getting aware of it. Mass = consciousness, possibly? I don't know. But you start noticing it. More, and more, and more, till you just can't bear it! Gravity, right? What can you do about gravity? Or mass? Honestly. ...But then, finally!—all of a sudden, the pressure releases. There's room. You have somewhere for it to go."

"The Schwarzchild radius," I say.

"Is that what it's called?" Fred says. "...Was he nice?"

"I, uh... couldn't say. Didn't know him personally."

"Pity," Fred says. "It was such a relief! Please thank him for me." A pause. "...'Him?'"

"Insofar as it matters," I say, "apparently so."

"All right," he says. "But anyway, it's such a simple thing. All your life you've been gathering stuff in. More and more, all the time. And you start saying to yourself, "This can't go on, it's just wrong, what happens if I eat everything? I don't want to eat everything!' You know? It's scary."

"I hear you, cuz," I say.

"But it doesn't matter what you think or feel; it just gets worse and worse. You swell on the inside but you can't swell on the outside, and you can't stop stuff from swirling in and in and in. You think, 'This is all wrong, it's going to be the end of me! And if it is, what else is there? What was this all about? Why am I not big enough?' And 'Why can't I be the same kind of "big enough" on both sides?' And the inside and the outside start fighting over which should be bigger—"

"I think I may know where this is going," I say.

"Yes! And then, all of a sudden, when you think you can't bear it another second longer, something happens and you just... evert!"

"Go inside out, you mean."

He laughs out loud. "Yeah, well, that's maybe a little simplistic...? I mean, when you're dealing with six dimensions and above, you sort of go inside out, and upside down, and sideways, and, you know, more ways than that."

"I'm sorry to say that I don't know," I say, "but I suspect it's memorable."

"Please!" he says. "My poor gnaester! You have no idea."

"Um... perhaps that's for the best."

"But the inside gets bigger than the outside," Fred says. And then adds, a bit abashed but also amused, "I was kind of late to the party on this, apparently. I'm told it's a trope."

"So it is," I said. "...For a lot of us, though. Takes a while to realize what's happened. But you're in good company."

"Oh good. Anyway, so then after that you start emitting all the stuff you earlier absorbed," Fred says. "You're a gateway. It's like... recycling, you know? Takes a while sometimes: some people have trouble emitting, after absorbing and absorbing for so long." He laughs. "Habit, yeah?"

"Yes it is," I say. "Habit is such a problem."

"Anyway," Fred says, "tell everybody it's okay. Black holes are about taking in what's over with, what's done. But when we shift, it's about letting whatever we ingested go out to be something new. Has to go through our insides first, though! That's what we're for."

"Recycling?" I say.

"Recycling. You're starstuff, sure!" And Fred laughs. "But sometimes even starstuff needs to go through the wash."

***

HTH!

#Young Wizards meta #black holes #white holes #Fred

317 notes · View notes

monamipencil · 1 day

Text

— angel eyes | l.sm

⋆ summary; though seokmin and you are focused on building a good relationship, you both forget an integral part of it. sex. or, in which you both have sex after being together for one year.

⋆ pairings; seokmin x fem! reader ⋆ genre; smut, angst (a teeny bit), fluff, established relationship ⋆ w.c; 3.7k+ ⋆ warnings; soonyoung slander, they're both horny and didn't have sex for no reason, seokmin is a loveable idiot, insecurities, oral (m. & f. receiving), unprotected sex (she's on pills), creampie, he's shy and adorable, mentions of food. ⋆ a/n; ty to the anon that came up with this idea. man, i love writing this guy.

Seokmin takes a deep breath for the nth time and rolls down the windows. He sighs, unbuttoning his shirt a bit to rid the hotness in the car. His hand moves to turn up the air cooler, but he stops halfway, eyes falling on your figure. You’re curled up in the passenger seat, pulling his coat tighter around you.

A soft smile graces his features as he shifts focus to the road again. The events of the night slip away from his mind easily as you replace them. Seokmin has never felt happier than with you. It’s easier to breathe around you, easy to be himself around you, easy to feel loved and love you back. Everything has been so easy, and he feels content with the relationship.

In fact, Seokmin even planned on going on one knee just 3 months into the relationship. He couldn’t help it. Everything flew naturally with you. And just like that, certain things didn’t even occur to him. Too focused on being in love, you both completely forgot about an integral part of a relationship. Sex.

The hard thing (no pun intended) is this had only been brought out to the limelight when one of his friends, Soonyoung, joked about it, unknowingly after your first anniversary. “Oh? Have you both even done it?”

Soonyoung did not expect the absolute silence that followed, which affirmed his statement. The air felt too thick for him, and he could hear his heart thrumming in his ear. The awkwardness quickly dissolved when Mingyu made a mess, and everyone jumped to bully him. Since then, it lingered in his mind like a ghost, and his cheeks burnt up coyly.

He wasn’t embarrassed, per se, but shy. He was never embarrassed about the relationship at any point. Always proud that you both were taking things slow and smooth, earning comments of marriage from others frequently.

And it's not like Seokmin shied away from the topic of sex either. He is a gentleman, not an idiot. And a bit shy.

Hence, exactly why he couldn’t bring himself to meet your eyes the rest of the night. Soonyoungs joke shed a different light on you, and he found himself catching the details he usually missed. Your cleavage that was slightly exposed when you bent forward, the curve of your ass when he placed his hand on your waist, the softness of your hips, and your soft, pretty lips, he found himself thinking about for the rest of the night.

But you were seemingly unaffected by any of it. You were your usual self, and when he shied away from your eyes, you simply pinched his cheeks and kissed the corner of his lips to silently say, “it’s ok.”

The kiss lingers on his skin warmly. He lifts his hand to caress your cheeks and smiles when you lean into his touch. But that smile drops when the strap of your dress falls, exposing your cleavage. With your curled-up position facing him, he can see it clearly.

Seokmin shifts his gaze back to the road, sporting a blush and a raging boner.

From then on, he had tried to initiate sex more often. Keyword; tried.

He stopped by a convenience store to buy some condoms but ended up completely off the track and bought some of his childhood snacks.

“Honey, I’m home!” He announces, making his way to you with a big smile. You greet him back, “Hi baby,”

“You won’t believe what I found!” He exclaims, showing off the goods he bought, and you tilt your head, squinting at the plastic bags of snacks. “My childhood snacks! I actually went to buy-” Oh, right. He went to buy condoms.

“Mhm, what did you want to buy?” you ask, fully focusing on him with a small smile.

“I—well, uh.. I forgot.” He stutters under your gaze, and you chuckle, finding him adorable. Pressing a kiss to his lips, you take some of the snacks from his. “Come on, let’s store them.”

“Huh? Ye—yeah.”

...

At least he’s trying.

He even googles up stuff! Countless articles pop up, and Seokmin is surprised to find that multiple people actually resonated with his problem. But it also worries him, and his heart sinks reading said articles — In a sexless relationship? Instant red flag! — Sexual incompatibility and its effects on long-term relationships — 6 ways to find out that your partner hates yo-

He slams the laptop shut and buried his face in his hands. Trying to ignore the lump in his throat, he rubs his face over and over again. Tears prick his waterline, and he can’t bite back the sob that rakes from his chest. What if you do hate him?

The insecurity gnaws at his heart, and he feels disgusted with himself. Seokmin hugs the pillow for some comfort and falls asleep within minutes.

God damn Soonyoung.

You groan out loudly, removing your hands from between your thighs and catching your breath. Ever since he brought it up, you found yourself like this often. Naked, horny, and sopping wet. You sigh heavily and turn around your bed, caressing his side of the bed.

Your boyfriend is fucking hot. He’s the most gorgeous man you know. Call it an exaggeration, but it is true. He’s a piece of art. And you? Well, you’re a woman.

A woman who has fallen head over heels for him.

Getting to know him through the first months of your relationship, you came to know about his gentle nature, and as others say, he’s god-sent, something you can’t deny. He’s got it all. Personality, looks, a rare kind of optimism, and certainly a good dick. (yes. You were going through an album he shared with you, consisting of old pictures from college and school, and interestingly enough, there was a mirror selfie of his naked self, sporting a boner.)

And being honest, Seokmin is quite naïve at times, and any horny feelings were unintentionally locked up in favor of taking things slow. You didn’t want to mess up things, and you see a future with him, leading to subconsciously pushing away intimate moments.

That is until Soonyoung opened the floodgates.

You groan again. Just because Soonyoungs words elicited a positive response from you doesn’t mean the same for Seokmin. He couldn’t even look at you after that, and with much of your efforts, you brought the relationship back to normal. But things are going south again, with him seemingly avoiding you. It is hard to do so when you are actively living with someone, but he is pent-up at work lately.

With another curse, you sit up, determined to set things straight, Not by talking, but by some other means.

He’s always stressed and tense from work, and what better stress-buster there is than sex? Checking the time, you smirk. There’s more than enough time to make extra preparations as well.

...

You’re lying on the bed again with a giddy feeling as you anxiously wait for your boyfriend to return him. You bite your lip, resisting the urge to check yourself in the mirror again. You bathed, sprayed his favorite perfume, and applied a bit of gloss, wanting to keep it natural. You’re wearing sexy white lingerie, not too provocative and not too boring, it was perfect. And since you didn’t want to give your boyfriend a heart attack, you wore one of his t-shirts, covering the lingerie.

The sound of the front door opening has you sitting up in a frantic and your heart races when you hear his usual “Honey, I’m home!” you take deep breaths to ease your nerves and go outside to greet him. His back is turned to you as he removes his shoes and places them on the rack at the entrance. You hug his back, wrapping your arms around his waist and burying your face into his upper back.

“Missed you,” you pout. You missed him so fucking much. Seokmin was taking mental escapes, and it really hurt to not see his usual happy-go-lucky self.

He freezes under your touch, and you sigh. He turns in your embrace and smiles sweetly at you, murmuring a soft, “missed you too.” Before slotting his lips on yours. Your hands come up to hold his face and deepen the kiss. He hums against your lips, one of his hands move to your waist and the other to your face.

He breaks the kiss, but not before another sweet peck. But you pull him in for another by grabbing his tie. He gasps when you bite his lip, giving you the perfect chance to slip in your tongue. He pulls you flush against him, fingers digging into your waist. You caress his hair and wrap your arms around his shoulder. The feeling of his tongue on yours is ecstatic, and you drown yourself in his scent.

You walk backward, slowly leading him to the bedroom. You gasp when he lifts you, and you wrap your legs around his waist, holding onto him. He gasps for breath and walks into the bedroom. Seokmin knows where this is leading, but he hasn’t processed any of what is happening now.

He’s drunk on your scent, and the way you look at him makes him oblige to you, like a man lured by a siren. You don’t cease your kisses but reduce them to pecks and slowly move from his lips to his neck. He grunts lowly, feeling you sucking and nibbling on his sensitive skin.

He sets you down on the bed, quickly moving to undo his tie, but you pull him down to the bed and straddle his hips. You bite back a moan, feeling his hard cock graze your thigh and continue your attack on his neck. He tilts his neck, giving you space, and rests his hands on your bare thighs, slowly moving them under the tee to your—oh.

The reality of what is happening dawns upon him as his fingers graze the lazy material of your panties. Seokmin gently pulls you away, gripping your shoulders as he looks at you with a bewildered look.

“Shit. Do—do you not want this?” he watches your face morph through multiple emotions, and he notices the tears forming.

“Wait, no. No! that’s not—wait. Please?” You nod, waiting for him.

But Seokmin cannot form a word for the life of him, and he panics, uttering continuous ‘I’s and ‘uhm’s. He gives up, sighing and catching your eyes on him. Fuck. His cock twitches in his pants, and he can’t help the nasty thoughts that form in his mind.

“Just,” he breathes in, closing his eyes before finding yours again. “Fuck me, please.”

You close the gap between you two, kissing his lips tenderly. Gently pushing him back, you make him lay on the mattress without breaking the kiss. You sigh against his lips, resting your forehead on his and silently searching for reassurance in his eyes. That reassurance comes with him pushing your hips down to his.

You sit up, smiling prettily at him before removing his t-shirt. His eyes widen, and his mouth falls agape as he sits up to have a better look. You wore this for him? He rests his hand on your thighs, fixating his eyes on your breasts. You giggle, “you like it?” he nods wordlessly before switching positions.

Seokmin looks down at your figure, “So pretty.” He whispers before kissing your neck, licking the skin, and nibbling on it. He kisses further and further down till he reaches the valley of your breasts. He looks up at you, catching your eager eyes and shit. The newfound confidence fades away, and his cheeks burn up.

To add to his shyness, you lift yourself up, undoing the bra and flinging it into some corner. You guide his hands to your breasts, and your nipples harden immediately under his touch. You moan, pushing your chest out, encouraging him to do whatever he fucking wants.

But you did not expect him to right away wrap his lips on your pebbled nipples as his hand toys with the other. You whimper and moan, turning putty in his hands. His tongue circles around your nipple before he sucks on it. Your panty sticks to your core like a second skin, and you feel more arousal drip through the material.

He switches to the other one, sucking so diligently on it. Before he could go further below, you stop him. “Wait. I want to see you too.” You whisper breathlessly.

You help him undress and bite your lips, soaking in his figure. Watching as he slips off his pants, you feel yourself grow hotter. Seokmin looks like what you could only describe as a walking wet dream. Your eyes dart all over his figure. Wide shoulders and strong biceps complemented by a firm chest and a toned abdomen. And, thick thighs complementing his—oh, god.

Your eyes widen, and your mouth waters as you see the outline of his cock. He’s thick and big. Enough to pleasure you and not enough to hurt. So, in total, it’s perfect. You just want him to bruise your insides and-

Seokmin holds your chin, gently tilting your head up to make you look at him. You look at him through your eyelashes and pout lightly at him while arching your back and closing your arms to push your breasts together.

His cock twitches, leaking pearls of precum that stained his boxers. His chest fills with confidence at the way you are reacting to him. Even he cannot comprehend what he's doing. Your effect on him is that powerful.

He takes you by surprise and kneels on the floor. It's his turn to look at you through his lashes, big brown eyes staring at you with need. You lick your lips, watching him as he pulls you to the edge and spreads your legs. He kisses your heat through the lacy material and licks at the patch formed by your arousal. His nose presses against your clit, and you gasp, feeling all the bones in your body weaken as he has his way with you.

Pulling away, he slides his fingers under the hem of your panties and peels it off you, leaving you bare. It joins the pile of clothes, and he dives right in, licking and kissing your folds. “Fuck!” you arch your back and push your cunt onto his face. His nose directly presses against your clit, and you moan as he basically fucking makes out with your cunt.

You close your legs around his head and tangle your fingers with his locks, pushing him further. He sucks on the little bundle of nerves, then circles his tongue around it with occasional kitten licks. You tug at his hair harshly, and your moans fill the room along with wet sounds as he eats you out. Feeling the orgasm inching closer, you force his mouth off you.

“Need you,” you whimper, grabbing his face and kissing him. He moans into your mouth as you roughly push your tongue past his lips, tasting yourself on him. His cock twitches with need when you rake your nails down his nape and shoulders. Seokmin grows hotter, thinking about your hands pumping his cock as you suck on his tip.

You pull away to get down on your knees and hook your finger under the hem of his boxers as he stands up. You pull it down, gawking at his hard, twitching cock, and take him in your hands. His cock rests heavy in your hands, and you couldn’t care less about the cold floor biting your knees. You give the tip an experimental lick, tasting his precum while batting your eyelashes up at him.

You grin, satisfied when he throws his head back, groaning at a small lick. Without warning, you take half of his length in your mouth, eyes rolling back at the feeling of it resting heavily on your tongue. He tangles his fingers in your hair, looking down at you while he moans a string of curses. Wrapping your fingers around his base, you pump his length and swirl your tongue around his tip.

You bounce your head up and down his cock, getting used to his girth. You pull away momentarily, and a string of saliva connects your lips to his tip. Licking your lips, you maintain eye contact with him and wrap your lips around his length once again. But this time, you take his full length in your mouth, gagging and enjoying how he fills you up. You hold his thighs for support, sliding his cock out fully before taking him again.

You do this a couple of times and feel him twitching in your mouth. Seokmin pulls your mouth off his cock, biting his lips in vain to prevent moaning at the erotic sight before him. You know how to put that mouth to use. A few more seconds and he would’ve cummed down your throat.

With a huff, he pulls you up and backs you to the bed. You lay on the soft sheet, letting him take control. You gasp when he teases his tip on your folds, coating it in your arousal, and he moans, feeling your warmth and wetness. His tip nears your entrance, stretching past your folds, and then—

“Shit. Condoms,” he curses, eyes snapping towards yours in worry. You chuckle, finding your dumbfounded boyfriend adorable. “I’m on pills. Don’t worry.”

His eyebrows crease, “Since when?”

“Since that dinner. Couldn’t stop thinking about you and your cock.”

A light blush settles on his cheek, and he smiles at you, shaking his head. He pushes his hair back to calm himself down, and you sigh, finding him hot. There he sits on his knees, between your legs, and a coat of sweat glistens on his skin. He looks ethereal and hot. Yeah, you’d let him rearrange your insides.

He chuckles, finding your lusty eyes ogling him. “You’re making me shy!”

And you hook your arms under your knees, pulling your legs to your chest. You bite your lips with a sultry look on your face, and he groans, watching your pussy glisten under the light. He readjusts himself, feeling your folds with his tip again.

You gasp and moan as his length fills you up, stretching your walls. You haven’t had sex in over a year, and you’re feeling the effects now. Tears well up, and you close your eyes, attempting to adjust to his length. Seokmin leans down, kissing your tears away, and you open your eyes, finding his chocolate eyes staring at you with love and lust.

“Shit. Is it too much? I can pull out, baby.” He softly says, voice laced with concern. You shake your head, whispering a ‘no.’ You lift your head up, slotting your lips against his.

You hook your hands around his nape, deepening the kiss. He holds your waist as you wrap your legs around his hips, holding still till you adjust. Your gummy walls grip his length tightly, making his head spin. After a few moments, you pull away from the kiss, taking a deep breath and nodding at him.

Seokmin pulls out slowly, leaving only his tip in before slowly sinking back. You both moan in unison when he fills up again. He does this a few times before settling into a comfortable and pleasurable pace. You moan with each snap of his hips towards yours, eyes rolling back in pleasure. His cock kisses your walls in all the right places.

His moans mix with yours in the bedroom, along with the sounds of your hips meeting. Your cunt squeezes his cock, and the wetness allows him to easily slide his cock in and out of you. The feeling of your arousal coating his cock is sinful, and your naked skin on his makes warmth pool in his chest.

He catches your lips in a sensual kiss, slowing down his pace. His tongue slides against yours easily, wandering your mouth. Your arousal drips down, sticking to his balls with each thrust. You bite his lower lip, making him whine into your mouth, and fasten his pace a bit. You slide your hand between your bodies to stimulate your clit, but he beats you to it.

Long, slender fingers rub at your clit, drawing in your orgasm. You buck your hips up, desperately meeting his cock and fingers. Seokmin moans when you clench his cock, speeding up his climax. You whine, feeling the familiar knot in your stomach, and he feels his cock twitch as well. His pace stutters, turning erratic as he kisses you messily.

With a moan of his name, you cum on his cock and hold onto him for dear life. He follows suit, hips stuttering to a halt as ribbons of cum paint your walls. He rests his forehead on yours, trying to catch his breath. You sigh in bliss, his warm cum filling you up to the brim.

He pulls out, falling to your side and instantly pulling you into a cuddle. His cum oozes out, and it should feel dirty, but it doesn’t. Instead, it feels like home, warm and cozy, with his cum filling up your cunt.

“I love you,” he whispers into your ear, and you giggle, feeling his breath tickle you. You can’t see him, but you feel his smile. “I love you too, baby.” And you giggle again when he kisses your neck, accidentally tickling you again.

His strong hands wrap around you comfortingly. And a serene silence envelops you both. Only for a while, though, “should I order pizzas?”

You heartily laugh, slapping his chest lightly, and peck his cheeks. He adorably grins at you, pulling you closer. You rest your head on his chest, hugging him with a lazy smile.

“Was that ok?” he voices out.

“Hmm, the pizza?”

His chest reverberates as he chuckles, “No—I mean yes. That’s also there but…”

“Was the … sex good?” he finishes, and you look up, meeting his curious eyes tinged with insecurity. But you smile brightly at him, nodding, “The best I’ve ever had.” His eyes widen before he squints at you playfully.

“Don’t lie, it was that good?”

“Yep. 10/10. Best cock in the world.”

You both laugh, and he adds, “your...” He coughs, “uhhh...” He gives up, gesturing towards your heat and nodding in acknowledgment. Your body shakes with laughter, and he hides his face shyly. You remove his hands and kiss his face, hugging him closer. Silence settles again, and you feel content in his arms before he speaks again.

“Also, pizza ok?”

tags; @seungkwanschicken @aaa-sia @dokyeomkyeom @bangantokchy @jespecially

@asyre @armycarat2612 @bewoyewo @pan-de-seungcheol

(send an ask to be added on the taglist!)

#seokmin #seokmin smut #svt smut #dokyeom #dokyeom smut #svt #lee seokmin #seventeen smut #seokmin x reader

273 notes · View notes

042502 · 19 hours

Text

𓏲 ๋࣭ ࣪ ˖ Dad Sturniolo ; Matthew Sturniolo.

𖦹ׂ summary : Matt, you and your daughter are going to visit Jaz's uncles Nick and Chris.

𖦹ׂ author's note : My first language is not Spanish, if you notice any errors you already know why. Here is the masterlist in case you like to read more about Matt.

"Have everything?" You ask once inside the car, you look towards the back seats.

There was the small baby chair, Matt was buckling his daughter's seat belts.

"Yeah, Nick bought a ridiculous amount of stuff for Jaz anyway." That being said, he carefully closes the back door to walk in front of the car and get in, putting on his seat belt.

"Nick is very nice, but didn't you mention to him that it wasn't necessary?" Matt looks at you tiredly and then says: "Believe me, I told him, he just does what he wants."

He starts the car and they start the road to Nick's house, It has only been two years since the brothers have decided to live alone. A loneliness not so lonely.

They usually visit each other so often that it seems like they have never been apart, that made you happy, because you enjoy their happiness. Especially since Jaz came into their lives.

Nick has taken it upon himself to be the star uncle for her, Every time they visited him he did not let go of the little girl for even a second. He has even proposed making a special room for her in his house, of course, Matt has refused.

"Have you texted Chris?" Matt shakes his head in denial. "He'll be mad if you don't mention that we're going to Nick's house."

"Maybe Nick already told him."

"We should tell him anyway"

Matt sighs and nods. You take Matt's cell phone and make a video call with Chris who answered quickly.

"Hey! Are you in the car?" Chris had a cute smile that made him frown when he noticed where you were. "Is Jaz okay? Where are you going?"

"Hey Chris, she's fine" you show Jaz in her seat sleeping.

"Oh she's so sweet and tender little girl, Uncle Chris misses you so much girl" Chris had used a squeaky voice when saying those words. "Oh yeah, I bought him some toys on Amazon, there are seriously so many great things there, I want to see them so I can give them to him."

"Oh Chris it's not necessary, she has a lot of toys and she's not big enough to use them yet"

"But someday it will be"

You laugh and then Matt speaks.

"Hey, listen, we're on our way to Nick's house." You focus on your boy driving, Matt had his eyes on the road.

"What? And you're barely telling me, you know I'm two hours away from his house."

"That's not my problem"

"Don't worry Chris, we won't leave until you get there" you smile at him.

"Of course they won't leave, I'm going there right now"

They say goodbye and shortly after that they arrive at a gas station to use the bathroom and buy some things to eat.

Jaz had woken up and with the car parked you take her in your arms, she has woken up very active.

"Oh someone's in a good mood, You know we're going to your uncles, right, baby?" You talk to your baby and she smiles, showing her pretty gums.

Matt was next to you devouring a sandwich, He cuts a piece and brings it to your lips so you can eat. Then he opens a small package of cookies and offers one to Jaz who receives it with enthusiasm.

Matt is extremely attentive to her. He knows absolutely every one of her tastes, he has a unique connection with her.

"Hey, I think you're forgetting something." Matt tickles Jaz's tummy and she laughs. "Where is the kiss for dad?"

Jaz looks at him mesmerized and then laughs, shaking her head as she bites into the cookie with her only two teeth.

"Won't you give it to me?" Matt pretended to be offended. "So Dad won't buy you any more cookies."

Jaz throws herself into Matt's arms and he hugs her with a lot of love, she kisses his cheek and makes Matt's heart explode with love.

"That is my girl" He smiles and begins the attack of kisses that he usually gives her, Jaz laughs at every kiss Matt gives her. She places her little hands on her dad's face and he smiles.

Jaz comes back into your arms, sits on your lap while you finish the sandwich. Your hand is still next to the baby's body when Matt takes it with the intention of annoying Jaz.

Every time Matt had a little approach towards you or physical contact, Jaz would get possessive and push Matt away from you.

At first Jaz doesn't notice her dad's hand on her mom's, but when she notices she pushes Matt's hand away.

Matt reaches for your hand again and Jaz pushes him away again, this time taking your hand.

"She doesn't want you to touch me Matthew" You scold him as you hold your daughter's hand.

"Come on Jaz" Matt smiles. "Wouldn't you like a little brother?" You roll your eyes at that.

Jaz nods excitedly, Matt approaches her and says: "then you must let me hold mom's hand, If you don't let me get close you won't have a little brother"

You open your mouth in surprise and lightly hit Matt's hand.

"Please I didn't say anything wrong, I'm talking about holding your hand" he laughs.

"Of course if you did"

Jaz returns to her chair, and they continue the trip to Nick's house. Once there, Nick receives them excitedly, of course all his attention was on Jaz. Playing with her and showing her all the things he bought her.

You and Matt were unpacking the last of your things when Chris arrived. Matt opens the door for him.

"Hello" Chris waves and walks straight past, he sees you and waves too, but his eyes are looking for someone else. "Where are you Jaz?" He hasn't even asked about Nick, you laugh and point to the living room.

Chris goes where you tell him and then you hear him scream followed by Jaz's laughter.

"The best uncle ever has arrived!"

Matt walks towards you and you smile at him.

"They have missed her"

"They saw her two days ago," Matt reminds you.

Then Chris comes in with Jaz in his arms, he looked so cute with her.

"You can tell him to stop calling himself 'the best uncle' because that sucks," Nick mentions while pointing at his brother.

"Okay I won't say I'm the best uncle, I'll say I'm Jaz's favorite uncle." Chris responds and Nick shakes his head in denial.

"You're not, he has another uncle here" it is marked.

"Hey Little girl " Chris takes Jaz's little hand in his, drawing her attention. "Who is your favorite uncle? Uncle Nick?" Chris turns to Nick, Jaz looks at him and Nick makes a cute expression to make her laugh, but she doesn't.

"Hey just now it was just the two of us" Nick complains.

"Or your uncle Chris?" Jaz looks at Chris and then remains silent.

"You must answer girl, and you say say that your cute Uncle Nick" Nick walks up to Jaz.

Jaz looks at both guys, but then... "Pa" looks at Matt and stretches his arms in his direction.

"Your dad doesn't count," Nick complains.

Chris walks over to Matt to take Jaz into his arms. She clings to him and Matt feels like a winner.

"She really hates you so much that she didn't even want to choose one of you, you suck."

"Hey, you know she prefers me" Chris smiles satisfied.

"She hasn't responded"

"Because she doesn't know how to talk at all yet," Chris reproaches.

You laughed at the uncles fighting over who was your daughter's favorite, but your heart was so warm from seeing Matt cradle Jaz in his arms. He looked so cute with her, you were so happy to have a little family with him. You wouldn't change it for anything.

𖦹ׂ author's note : Thanks for reading, remember to leave your like and a comment. If you want to be part of the taglist, leave a comment below to add yourself.

𖦹ׂ taglist : @luverboychris @l34n @sturncakez @imwetforyourmom @hotreaderliin @tillies33ssss @sturnioloxlver @jnkvivi @stvrniolowh0re @adirtylittleheart @ilovechrisssturniolo-deactivate @melonjollyranche @sssoniaswiftt @ecliphttlunar @jetaimevous

209 notes · View notes

illyrianbitch · 13 hours

Text

Blessed

Pairing: Lesser Fae Acheron!Reader x Eris Vanserra

Summary: Angered by Nesta's actions, the Cauldron turned you into a fae different than your sisters— a lesser one that resembled more animal than human. Now living in Autumn, Eris shows you a new perspective on yourself.

Warnings: mainly fluff, sprinkles of self-hatred and low confidence, mentions of previous trauma, just reader being shown her worth!

Word Count: 3.2k

a/n: unedited so pls ignore anything tehehe i was just excited to post

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

There was a faint breeze that kissed your skin as you walked a step behind Eris.

The vibrant hues of fall leaves surrounded you— beautiful trees of red, orange, and yellow. But you were stuck far too into your mind to appreciate the sight. Even after your move to Autumn, and your growing relationship with Eris, you spent your days in your head, wishing to keep distance between you and every other living creature.

But it wasn’t possible. Even now, you weren’t able to hide behind fabrics— no cloaks or jackets could hide the antlers that had sprouted from your head or the spots and markings that adorned your skin. You were exposed in every way you wished to hide. It was hard to appreciate the world around you when it had cursed you to be such a creature.

"Where are we going?" you asked, your voice barely a whisper. The sound of it alone was tired and timid, and for a moment you barely recognized it yourself.

Eris didn't answer immediately. Instead, he stopped, causing you to halt in your tracks as he turned to face you. His expression was unreadable for a moment before softening into something you couldn't quite place. His eyes scanned your face.

"Do you trust me?"

His voice was gentle, a soft cadence that balanced the cool fall breeze perfectly.

You met his gaze, studying the lines of his face, the way his eyes seemed to soften in your presence. There was a gentle smile playing on his lips, but beneath it, you detected a flicker of uncertainty, as if he was afraid of what your answer might be.

A warmth in your chest spread as you replied. "Yes.”

Eris let out a breath as the smile on his face grew. He extended his hand towards you.

"Then let me show you something,” he said, “I hope it will prove something to you.”

You frowned slightly at his words but took his hand nonetheless, feeling how the warmth of his skin spread throughout your body. You didn’t dare to look down at where your hands met, at where the markings on your skin would stand in such contrast to his immaculate human-like hands. You brushed the thought away as he led further into the depths of the forest.

You stole glances at him as you walked, admiring how different he looked now, surrounded by his court, than those times you'd seen him at the Night Court. He seemed so regal, so effortlessly handsome and elegant— an image so far from the one he’d kept at first, the darkness, mystery, and cruelty that shrouded him before.

He looked back every other moment, making sure to catch your eye and give you a reassuring gesture, a smile or a squeeze on your hands. And those eyes—those mesmerizing eyes—seemed to hold so much. So many emotions, so much intellect, and so much capability for kindness.

It shocked you, truly, to think about a time when those eyes were only cruel, only calculated. But perhaps it was only you he looked at with such kindness. Or, perhaps it was sorrow he felt for you, for your situation and the way you were Made. You tried not to think about it too often, tried not to make yourself sad by the reality that Eris, the powerful new High Lord of Autumn, was forever mated to you– a cursed, creature of a female, a disgrace compared to you devastatingly beautiful High Fae sisters.

But here he was, holding your hand and guiding you into the forest of his court— your court. And your heart fluttered in a way you still weren't used to.

It was a few more minutes of walking in comfortable silence until you arrived at a small clearing within the embrace of the trees. The area was adorned with fallen leaves and small boulders, and the sound of a babbling creek nearby filled the air with a soothing melody. A sudden sense of peace washed over you, easing the weight of sadness that had been clinging to your shoulders like second skin.

Breathing out a sigh of contentment, you turned to face Eris, who had gently dropped your hand. You took in the beauty of the scene before you, the colors of autumn painting a picturesque backdrop that seemed to come alive with every rustle of the leaves. You brought your hands together at your chest, meeting his eyes with a timid smile.

"I'm still so stunned by the beauty of it all,” you said, turning around to take in your surroundings once more. “Even after seeing it so often.”

Eris simply stared at you, the smile on his lips never fading. Something glowed deep in him. "I understand the feeling.”

You missed the way his eyes softened with awe at you, at the sight of you taking in the world around you—the way your eyes sparkled with wonder. His words weren’t meant for the woods around him, weren’t about the beautiful nature you now looked at.

"Are you willing to do me a favor?”

You turned to him, narrowing your eyes playfully as you took in the glint of his eyes. "Depends on the favor, Vanserra."

A grin tugged at the corners of his lips. With a nod, he beckoned you closer, his eyes never leaving yours.

"Come closer, Archeron, and then I can ask it of you.” A faint heat rose to your cheeks as you stepped forward, your gaze now falling to the ground to avoid the magnetic pull of his own. A nervous flutter danced in your chest, and you chided yourself for being so silly— blushing over a male like a child with a crush. A male who was tied to you by some mystical, godly thread. It was still so much to wrap your mind around— how strongly you felt towards him in such little time.

Eris slowly extended both of his hands towards you, the palms of his ring-clad hands facing upwards. You hesitated, face furrowing in uncertainty as your gaze flickered between his hands and his face.

"And here I thought you said you trusted me," he teased. His voice remained just as gentle.

A laugh escaped your lips, a sound that bubbled up from deep within you. It echoed through the quiet clearing and Eris’ eyes lit up. A smile tugged at his lips as you finally reached out, placing your palms gently against his.

With a soft exhale, he instructed, "Close your eyes."

You furrowed your brow once more. "What for?"

"I just want you to take it all in," Eris replied, his tone earnest. "Close your eyes. And then we can try something."

You nodded. “Okay.”

You allowed yourself to surrender to the moment, eyelids fluttering shut as you let out a deep breath. The world around you faded away, leaving only the sound of the babbling creek and the feel of Eris's hands beneath yours.

You sunk into the peaceful rhythm of your heartbeat, and deep down, it almost felt as if you could feel Eris's heartbeat echoing yours, the pulsing of his heart through the palms that touched your own.

After a while, his voice broke the silence. "Keep your eyes closed. I'm going to let your hands go."

A slight pang of disappointment grew in your chest at the thought of losing the warmth of his touch, but you nodded nonetheless. You pulled your hands back into your chest, holding them together as you listened to the sound of leaves crunching beneath his boots.

"I'll be right here. Is that alright?"

Eris spoke again, his voice now coming from behind you.

You jumped at the sudden proximity, and a nervous shiver ran down your spine as you felt his breath against your skin, his warmth enveloping you from behind. Swallowing hard, you willed yourself to calm down, to ignore the fluttering of your heart. He let out a small breathy laugh.

"Sorry," Eris murmured, his voice light with a sense of amusement. “I’ll give a better warning next time.”

You could hear the smile in his voice.

"Are your eyes closed too?" you found yourself asking, the words slipping out before you could stop them.

"Do you want them to be?"

Feeling a blush rise to your cheeks at the realization of how silly your question was, you whispered, "Well, I wouldn't want to be alone."

Another laugh escaped Eris. "You're not alone. I'm here."

You let out a ragged breath. “Right.”

"Just take a deep breath, Y/n," he continued.

You did your best to ignore how your stomach seemed to flip at the sound of your name on his lips and you nodded his response, following his guidance as you took in the fresh air around you.

"Focus on the sounds around you," Eris continued, "On the earth beneath your feet."

It only took a few moments before you began to feel acutely aware of every sensation coursing through your body. The gentle sway of the trees in the breeze sent shivers down your spine, the earth beneath your feet pulsed with life, grounding you in the present moment, to the presence of Eris behind you.

Each breath you took filled your lungs with the crisp autumn air, invigorating you from the inside out. A faint echo of leaves crunching filled your ears, your mind wandering to thoughts of the life that must be found within these woods. Every rustle, every chirp, every whisper— magnified, as if the forest itself was alive and speaking to you in its own language.

"What do you feel?"

"I feel... alive," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. "I feel connected to everything around me, as if I'm a part of this forest, this world."

It was a feeling unlike any other you’d ever felt— a sense of belonging that washed over you like a warm embrace. You nearly cried at the feeling, at the realization of how desperate you had been for it, how difficult it had been to watch your sister’s grow into their new lives while you felt so strange, so at odds with it.

"Anything else?" Eris prompted, his voice soft, coaxing.

You paused, taking a moment to listen to yourself, to the feelings that swirled within you, to the sensations throughout your body. “Curiosity," you admitted, your face slightly furrowing at the realization.

Eris placed his hands on your arms, the warmth of his touch seeping through the fabric of your dress. A smile tugged at your lips at the comforting sensation and the crease between your brows quickly faded.

And then, leaning in closer, Eris whispered, "Open your eyes."

Your heart skipped a beat at the sound of his voice, a sense of excitement – giddiness, almost– coursing through your veins as you slowly opened your eyes.

As your gaze adjusted to the sight before you, your breath hitched in your throat.

There, standing before you, was the most stunning doe you had ever seen. Her coat shimmered in the sunlight that filtered through the trees and her eyes held a softness that seemed to reach into the depths of your soul. Somewhere deep inside of you, something sang. Beside her stood a small fawn, eyes wide and curious as she regarded you with innocence and wonder– curiosity. It was curiosity.

But it wasn't just the two of them. Behind them, hidden amongst the trees, were more deer.

You blinked in disbelief. Turning your head to glance over your shoulder, you found Eris already looking at you.. His eyes gleamed as he peered down at you, and a proud smile played at the corners of his lips.

Eris gently motioned you forward with a soft push on your bicep. You glanced back at him, uncertainty flickering in your gaze, in your wide eyes and parted lips. He nodded forward, silently urging you on once more, and a knot of nerves formed in your stomach.

"Eris..." you began, voice trailing off as you turned your attention back to the doe before you. Your heart pounded in your chest as you hesitated, nervous to make a move. Deer tended to be timid creatures, and the last thing you wanted was to startle them.

Memories from the past flooded your mind. You thought back to the times when you struggled to provide for your starving family, the guilt weighing heavily on your conscience— a stain that still existed, just as dark as the first days when it began to form. You remembered how Feyre understood when you couldn't hunt with her, despite how easily you were able to track deer, how she accepted your help in other ways.

And now, as you stared at the doe before you, you couldn't shake the feeling of unworthiness that gnawed at your insides. How did you deserve this moment of peace, this connection with nature, when you carried the weight of your past actions on your shoulders? A sense of peace like this was earned— deserved. You had done nothing but hide away.

You glanced back at Eris.

Was this what he felt like? Had he, too, struggled with a sense of peace and belonging that seemed almost too good to be true? With a deep breath, you gathered your courage and took a hesitant step forward, still worried, almost overly cautious, that your movements might startle the animals before you.

But to your surprise, instead of fleeing, the doe lowered her head in a gesture of acceptance, and the fawn cautiously approached you.

There was a bubbling of emotions in your chest, feelings that swirled within you– mixtures of awe and vulnerability. The small fawn approached you on bending legs, and you kneeled down slightly, watching as its small gaze was fixed on you. You let out a small laugh, your mouth breaking into a smile as the creature regarded you with such comfortability.

From behind, you watched as the mother doe moved forward, and out of caution, you stood up slowly. She inched forward more, her fawn at the side of her legs. An instinctive sensation prickled at you, and with trembling hands, you extended your palm outward, offering it in a gesture of peace— or so you hoped.

The mother doe approached, her nose brushing against your hand as she stared at you with those deep, soulful eyes.

"She is not threatened," you whispered softly.

You glanced back at Eris, who began to walk towards you. His movements caused the doe before you to stiffen under your touch, and you quickly found yourself murmuring to her, in a voice intended solely for you and the creature, "He's alright. It’s alright."

A sense of relaxation washed over you as the animal before you seemed to relax once more, her small fawn approaching Eris with excited movements.

"How do I know that?" you asked him. Eris watched as you looked back at the deer before you, as you placed your hand on her snout, feeling the warmth of her breath against your skin. “How do I know that she’s not threatened?”

There was a small pause. “Have you been told much about The Mother?”

You frowned, eyes still trained on the animal before you, hand still gently touching her fur. “Not really.”

You stilled for a moment before letting out a small sigh. “I think you underestimate how hidden away I was, how little I interacted with my family once I became….this.”

Eris’ heart sank at the way you regarded yourself, and he let out a deep breath.

"The Mother is said to know the heart of every living thing. Her connection with nature is something renowned. Think of it as a bond.”

You glanced at him over your shoulder. “Like ours?”

There was a tug in your chest at the mention of that bond, of that thread that tied you and Eris together— you and the male that currently regarded you with such awe. Even the way he spoke made your heart flutter, made you want to ask him of all the things he’d learned about. You’d quickly come to know that Eris was quite the intellect. It was showing especially now, as he spoke.

“Somewhat,” he responded, “A different type of bond. But yes, just as strong. Just as sacred.”

You smiled at the words. And then, you listened intently as Eris spoke of how stories his own mother told him growing up, stories of how The Mother had once walked among the forests, her very presence a blessing to all who crossed her path. She cared for the world with a tenderness and love that knew no bounds, nurturing the land and its inhabitants with a gentle hand.

"Those who care for the world that she so carefully tended are said to be blessed by her," Eris continued. His voice was soft and low with a sense of reverence that made your heart beat calmer, slower— one that filled you with a sense of sanctity and respect. "The Mother sees the goodness in their hearts and rewards them with her favor."

A sense of wonder, of awe and admiration washed over you, and you felt tears welling up in your eyes. You weren’t certain where the emotions were coming from, whether it was the peace in your heart, the tenderness of Eris’ voice or the beautiful animals before you— it was all overwhelming, so beautifully soul-igniting. There was a tug in your chest, a feeling of breathlessness mingled with an inexplicable longing, as if you were being drawn into something greater than yourself, something infinitely beautiful and sacred.

You turned to look at Eris as he walked towards you, closing the distance that remained. At your feet, the small fawn brushed past the fabrics of your dress.

"The Cauldron was angry when Nesta stole from it. It wanted to punish you for her actions.”

You nodded absentmindedly, nodded at the memory, at the excruciating pain you had felt. Your thoughts ran back to the anger you harbored towards your family, the fear and embarrassment– the envy that your sisters had been made so beautiful where you had been wronged. So deeply, unnaturally, strangely wronged.

Your lip quivered. Eris’ eyes softened.

"You've led yourself to believe that you are cursed," he said softly, “Do you want to know what I believe?”

You blinked away tears. “What do you believe?”

“The Mother protected you. Saved you.”

Your hand fell gently from the doe’s snout, an overwhelming, crushing sense of relief flooding through your body like a wave, rippling through your arms, exploding in your chest.

Eris’ hand reached out to grasp yours, and with his eyes still trained on you, he brought your hand to his lips— the same hand freckled with spots, with ones that mirrored the fawn that stood below you. He placed a gentle kiss to your knuckles before raising your hand slightly.

You watched in astonishment as a small butterfly appeared, alighting on your palm with delicate grace. A tear slipped from your eye as your lips parted.

"You are far from cursed, Y/n," Eris said tenderly, "You are blessed."

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹

guys ngl i have an entire universe of ideas for this pairing...just the parallel of eris and a lesser fae reader and what happened to lucien and jesminda??? reader struggling at first and eris feeling the bond so strongly he needs to stay away but reader mistakes it as him being disgusted?? reader x lucien friendship??? reader being representation for lesser fae??? PLEASEEE

like ask @itsswritten i already love this pairing but idk if yall are as interested. lmk and ima make a taglist!!

permanent tag list 🫶🏻: @rhysandorian @itsswritten @milswrites @lilah-asteria @georgiadixon

@glam-targaryen @nighttimemoonlover

#eris x reader #eris vanserra x reader #eris vanserra x you #acotar fanfiction #eris vanserra #acotar x you #acotar x reader #acotar #eris acotar #eris x you #eris x y/n #autumn court #eris fanfic #eris imagine #acosf #eris vanserra acotar #eris vanserra fic #acotar fandom

223 notes · View notes

euthymiya · 15 hours

Text

loving is easy (it didn’t used to be) ft. wriothesley

in which a familiar face brings wriothesley to a dark place, a place from where only you can pull him out. you always find a way to staunch the flow of blood from his broken knuckles, one delicate kiss at a time

contains: 2.7k word count ; female reader ; spoilers for wrio’s backstory and quest—briefly touches briefly on murder and child exploitation and trafficking ; mentions of blood and injuries (pankration rank) ; reverse comfort ; established relationship ; angst with a lot of fluff too ; this is slightly a character study of wrio i suppose

“—thesley, stop—wriothesley! you need to stop!”

“your grace, that’s enough!”

one voice calls out to him after the other. slowly. one by one. they register in his ears after being muffled for so long, after only the sound of his own voice rang in his head for so long.

more. he can take more. again. give him another. one more. don’t stop. another punch. punch. don’t stop punching. just keep punching.

he can hear the words repeating in his head as he lands a fist one after the other to the swollen, bloodied face under him.

finally, he stops—he doesn’t have a choice. his shoulders are grabbed, strong sets of multiple hands holding his arms back before his knuckles can make another precise landing to their target.

typically, wriothesley doesn’t participate in pankration rank matches very often. the place is entirely reserved for him to use after hours, when his boxing gloves can come out and a punching bag can take the brunt of his hits.

it’s better that way. it’s less likely to cause injury of inmates, it’s an effective method to get rid of his pent up frustrations through the day, and it’s a wonderful way to exercise and get in a work out.

today, however, he can’t wait that long. the thought of waiting until everyone’s off to their quarters to sleep, until the rank is his alone in the dead of night, until hours have passed and he’s had to suffer simmering in his thoughts is not something he thinks he handle today.

today, on a rare whim, wriothesley decides to join a match himself. he’s done so before—and in all fairness, it’s never exactly turned out poorly. sure, he wins a bit too easily, and, of course, the inmates are typically too nervous to really give him a proper fight. but it’s not the first time, he joined.

but right now, as his senses return to him, as the guards pry his body off the opponent he’s pinned to the ground, as your concerned gasp rings in echoes through his ears and sigewinne’s shocked face quickly approaches the unconscious and bloody figure crumpled on the floor, he thinks this might just be his last match.

“wriothesley,” you whisper, voice shaky and disbelieving, “what in teyvat has gotten into you?”

he stares down at his fists.

blood.

so, so much blood. just like that day—just like that cursed day. his hands shake as they ball into tight fists, nails digging into the meat of his palms. the pain feels good, he faintly registers. it feels like something, anything against the numbness he’s starting feel spread across his entire body.

he’s fairly certain the only reason he’s standing upright anymore is because the guards are there to stabilize his body.

“someone should take him to the infirmary,” you set your shoulders back, a firm tone taking over your voice as you decide to handle the clear poorly tamed situation. you gesture at the limp form on the floor, making guards nod as they rush over and lift the body. “sigewinne, will you be able to take care of him?”

“of course,” she nods, quickly following after the guards as they leave.

wriothesley’s not fit to do anything but stare off in a trance for the moment. you’ll tackle that issue in a bit—first, you turn to the surrounding crowd, voice strict as you say, “everyone is to leave the rank. now.”

inmates at the fortress know better than to question you. at times, they even wonder if you have more authority over wriothesley than he does himself over the entire fortress. they quickly file out of the room, hushed murmurs between them all that you pay no mind to.

what do you reckon has gotten into his grace?

you think that guy’ll be alright?

it’s a good thing i didn’t participate today.

me too.

you catch the faint words every now and then as all the bodies quickly empty out of the rank, leaving you, your boyfriend, and the few guards still holding him upright.

“my lady,” a guard quickly walks up to you, urgently handing you a first aid kit as she adds, “the head nurse has requested for this to be delivered to you.”

“thank you,” you murmur softly, taking the kit in your hands before smiling at the guards that slowly but surely let go of wriothesley’s arms, letting him stumble over until he stops just before your figure.

his eyes are still so distant, so hollow.

“we’ll be off,” one of the guards nods, “we’ll leave his grace to you.”

“of course,” you return the gesture, watching as they slowly exit too, leaving you and the duke to yourselves.

you look at him in concern. he doesn’t meet your eyes, focusing on the blood stains on the floor not too far away.

“baby,” you say gently. delicately. like approaching a small, caged animal as you carefully reach a hand over. he doesn’t pull away, but he stiffens as your hand cups his cheek, “you should sit down. i’ll just clean your hands, okay?”

“i…”

“c’mon,” you guide him by the wrist, slow steps that he follows, completely silent, completely resigned to letting you pull him along as he blindly follows.

you softly push him to sit on a bench at the side, grabbing a hand and slowly setting to work. he doesn’t even let out his usual exaggerated hiss when the sting meets his broken skin as you disinfect it with a cloth.

“i didn’t mean to,” he says quietly after some time, overwhelming guilt coating his words. “i don’t…i can’t figure out what came over me.”

“i know you didn’t,” you reassure, pausing when his eyes stare up at you unsure. “you’d never mean to hurt anyone.”

his face tells you he doesn’t believe you—don’t you know what got him sent here in the first place? how could you say that so confidently when you know his past?

he scoffs bitterly, looking away as he mutters, “yeah, sure.”

“so you meant to hurt that guy?” you raise a brow, making his lips curl into a frown as he pauses, contemplating your words before slumping in defeat and glumly shaking his head.

“no,” he mumbles lowly, voice hardly audible if you weren’t so close, so intent on hearing him.

“okay, what’s on your mind, baby?” you press a sweet kiss to his forehead. his hand is still in yours, cleaned and bandaged now as your thumbs trace over the tough, dried calluses of his palms. “talk to me.”

“nothing,” he says gruffly, not meeting your eyes as you look at him and sigh.

“i’d believe you sooner if you told me you were trying to kill that guy,” you reply—you think you might immediately regret the choice of words as soon as he flinches.

kill.

was he trying to kill the man? it certainly feels like he might’ve been. he didn’t mean to lose control like that, he’d never purposely hurt an inmate in such a manner. but one taunt turned to two, and it’s easy for the cocky opponent of his to get under his skin—something that’s so unusual, so unlike wriothesley.

he can’t remember the last time someone’s, let alone an inmate’s words mattered to him. someone apart from you, perhaps sigewinne.

“you haven’t been yourself since the newest prisoner,” you note, voice taking on a careful lilt as you brush back sweaty strands of hair from his forehead, pressing a lingering kiss to the skin.

he closes his eyes, letting out a stuttering breath.

“what makes you say that?”

it’s a deflection—wriothesley is certain you’ll see through him, but it doesn’t stop him from avoiding the heart of the matter nonetheless. he doesn’t look at you, opting to stare down at the bandaged knuckles of his hands, imagining the blood that was just there moments ago.

he’s familiar with blood on his hands. this wouldn’t be the first time, and he’s certain it won’t be the last. he wonders why he was destined at such a young age to always feel the thick, crimson liquid coat his skin. why he of all people is cursed to feel the warmth of life spill across his knuckles and turn cold.

wriothesley doesn’t even blink, doesn’t even register your hands covering his own, squeezing as gently as possible so you don’t disrupt the sore skin under the cotton.

“wriothesley,” you call, hands moving to cup his cheeks, “it’s okay, i promise.”

i’m here now. you can trust me. i won’t betray you. i won’t let anyone betray you.

that’s what you mean—he can hear the words hidden under the ones you speak, whispering to him like echoes that speak over the calls of his childhood.

they’re enough to make him bury his face into your shirt, inhaling the scent of you to try and forget the wretched scent of blood. he’s so tired of blood.

“that new inmate,” he starts, voice hoarse, croaking so weakly, your hand cups the back of his head to bring him closer, “he was my older brother. when i was a kid.”

wriothesley’s childhood is not foreign to you. you’d read the files before you came down to the fortress for work, and even after your relationship shifts from colleagues to lovers, he tells you. the version that’s seen from the haunted eyes of a little boy forced into the reality of a man. the version that doesn’t speak through the codes of law, but the horrors of a child with no way out. the version that makes wriothesley human, not a criminal.

he doesn’t speak of his siblings, not often anyway. too many of them left before him, before he could have known they needed to be free. he doesn’t know what happened to them, and you think he might never want to know. the ones he set free have lives of their own, he tells you. he took it upon himself to find out, just to be certain.

just to know they’re safe.

you’re sure this recent prisoner must be the first of his older siblings that he’s ever come across past his youth.

“he doesn’t recognize me,” he whispers, fingers hooking into your shirt as he grips you, “i can tell.”

“do you want him to?”

“no,” he admits, “i don’t…he doesn’t know me as wriothesley. maybe that’s for the best—i don’t think knowing it’s me would be very good for him.”

“i’m sure he misses you,” you soothe your fingers through his hair, raking your nails across his scalp as he shivers at the tenderness of your touch. “just like you missed him.”

tenderness has never come to him without a price. his mother’s gentle hands and his father’s kind words all came at the expectation of mora. mora through his mind and body as though it were theirs to sell away like he was nothing. a mere commodity to come by and own rather than a child to love and nurture.

your tenderness comes without a price. without so much as an expectation for the affection in return. your love comes because it wants to, because loving him is the price you earn, not the price you pay.

“i’m too different now,” he says quietly, “i can’t be what he needs. not as a brother—i was too late.”

“too late for what?” you scoff, pulling his face from your shirt much to his disapproval. the soft flesh of his cheeks spill over your palms as you squeeze them together, forcing his head to tilt up and meet your gaze. “too late to what? to setting him free? you were a child.”

“i know,” he sighs, fluttering his eyes closed once more as your thumb strokes the scar under his eye. “we all were.”

wriothesley hates this scar in particular. it’s right under his eye, the first place he glances to when he looks at his own reflection. he can’t even assure his hair isn’t unruly without being reminded of the unfairness life has handed to him—but you love it. he thinks you must, with the way you kiss it so often. feel it under your delicate thumb. look at it so fondly. trace it with your index finger when you think he’s sleeping.

you love such ugly parts of him, he wonders if he’s ugly at all. if maybe he’s just bent, waiting for your hands to come gently mold him to be smooth, undamaged.

but you never try to fix him. instead, you try to love him for all the dents and scratches that he is, unwilling to change him despite all the flaws that stick out like a sore thumb.

that must be what love his, he realizes one day. not spilling blood on your hands for the sake of the ones you love, not leaving them behind so they won’t be tainted by your sins, not pretending they don’t exist so they can be free from being of reminded the horrors that cling to you.

love is you, when you look straight into his terrible, shriveled heart, stomped on and shattered over and over, collecting the shards in awe. loving each piece no matter how tiny, no matter how difficult to hold onto. love is choosing not to put them back together in a cracked, messy version of what it once was, choosing to file away and soften the sharp edges slowly, even as it makes your fingers bleed. love is keeping him close, even when he stands so far, walking extra steps even when your heels and calves ache from closing the distance he puts between you.

love is so easy to you, he wonders why it’s been so difficult the rest of his life. how can something seem so effortless now, after it took blood and tears from his for so long before?

he doesn’t know. but he doesn’t want to return to those dark, wretched days. his mothers hands weren’t kind, they didn’t hold him, didn’t protect him like they should have. his father’s eyes didn’t hold light, they never glowed at the sight of him, never shed a tear for his sake. and his siblings—oh how he once loved his siblings, how he considered himself so lucky, so gifted to run among them with his tiny, innocent feet.

but that’s gone now. those days are over. he no longer uses that cursed name he once answered so gleefully. he’s wriothesley now—duke. administrator. warden. your lover.

he’s fine with just that.

“what’s he here for?” you ask after some time, breaking the comfortable silence as he stays buried into your embrace.

“murder. just like me—the family he was sold to.”

“he’ll be okay,” you hum, trailing your hand to find his back, rubbing up and down the planes of his muscles through his shirt. “i’m sure of it.”

“how can you be so sure?” he asks disbelievingly, “i was at my lowest after my sentence.”

“you didn’t have an administrator as capable as you,” you point out. “he’ll be okay. he has you—whether it’s as his brother or as wriothesley. it’s up to you. either is more than enough.”

“you think so?” he looks up, pressing a kiss to the pad of your thumb as you trace his curled lips.

you nod, grinning gently as you say, “of course. when have i ever been wrong?”

“i suppose never,” he chuckles—his knuckles feel lighter now, as they mold to fit over your hips, holding your waist securely as if he holds his whole world.

he does. he doesn’t tell you, but he does.

“you have an injured inmate you owe an apology to, by the way,” you remind him, laughing as he pouts into your hand, laying his cheek further against your palm.

“i’m injured too,” he protests, “it’ll have to wait until i’m healed.”

you raise a brow, giving him an amused look. “and where exactly are you injured, your grace?”

he holds his hands out to you, the evidence of your tender love and care evident through the careful bandaging. but he’s selfish. because you let him be.

so he asks for more, in a simple plead of, “i need to be kissed better. please?”

you shake your head and laugh as he bats his lashes, but you don’t dare deny him. never saying no to more love, never running out of the affection he doesn’t know if he quite deserves.

“will it allow you a speedy recovery?”

“most definitely,” he confirms, nodding in all seriousness.

“fine then,” you snort. you kiss his knuckles, one press of your feather-light lips at a time.

the haunting feeling of blood goes away—all that’s left is the easy, simple feeling of being loved.

i headcanon that wrio recognizes an inmate when they’re new a bit after he becomes warden as one of the older children he was adopted with and spirals for a few days because their crimes are so similar to his but as an adult. and he mourns that he was too little back then to set the children before him free. and i wish i could tell you why all of my hcs about wrio are so depressing but he’s more fun to write that way bc then he’s that much more in love with reader when she comes into the picture ;)

#writing tag #wriothesley x reader #wriothesley x you #wriothesley fluff #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin fluff #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin impact fluff

230 notes · View notes

luveline · 2 days

Note

Hellouuuu! I loved the Hotch teacher au, and I was wondering if could request more of them? Something a little more flirty/more direct but still a tad worried about crossing lines

—Hotch worries about crossing a line, but he can’t stop himself any longer. fem, 1k

“Hello, Mr. Hotchner.”

Aaron is far past the age where he gets nervous around women —age, or something else?— but the sound of your voice excites his heart. One moment he’s relaxed, watching idly as Jack races around the park on his bike with a grin, the next he’s alert. He’s sitting up.

He says your name more to himself than to you as you take a seat on the grass beside him. You’re in a summer dress, leaves of your skirt falling gently against your thighs as you shift.

“Hello,” he says.

“Hi, Aaron.”

He looks over the sunny grass and his surroundings in a slow catalogue of threats. He chose this park because it’s small enough to keep an eye on everybody. There are no surrounding woods, no wild animals, and no chances of Jack being snatched. Or, Jack could get snatched, but Aaron had confidence in his ability to keep pace.

“Are you looking for danger?” you ask softly.

He turns to you with a frown. “Why, is there something I’ve missed?” Your laugh ends his facade swiftly. “I want to give you my full attention,” he clarifies, “but I worry when he’s alone.”

“I can cope with half of it,” you say.

In a move that awakens some young notion of romanticism in him, you rest your face on your arm, squinting in the sunshine. The golden hour kisses your neck.

He can’t take it anymore. You’re Jack's teacher, but he can’t.

“You look beautiful,” he says, tone lowered in an attempt to match the air.

You laugh in your squinting and turn your face from him completely. Your arms shake with your laugh, the strap slipping down as you move. “You intimidate me so much, sometimes,” you say through it.

“I do?”

“I feel like you can guess everything I think.”

“I can’t. I can try.” He looks down to see Jack’s discarded his bike in favour of kneeling in the grass, a stick in hand. “But it requires some effort, sometimes, and while I’m not uninterested in knowing what you’re thinking, I’m not interrogating you.”

You sit up, smiling once again. “Well, what am I thinking now?”

“I thought you were scared of me?”

“I’m not scared of you, Aaron. I said ‘intimidated’.” You cross your arm over your stomach. “Is that okay? Will you tell me what I’m thinking about?”

He pauses. Take a deep but paced breath. “You’re thinking about me, but… You have your arm over your stomach, and your chest. You're guarding your vulnerabilities and yet you’re smiling. You’re wearing a dress in the same cut as the one you were wearing when I first called you pretty, but you couldn’t have known you’d see me here. It’s new. A new dress.”

You remember that he called you pretty, and you’ve begun to gravitate toward the same cut unconsciously, he can see easily from your little frown you hadn’t realised it until now. He has no intention of upsetting you, and he continues.

“You’re thinking about when I’m going to ask you on a date,” he says carefully.

“How could you know that?” you ask, still speaking softly, giving little indication as to whether he’s right or wrong.

Aaron could tell you it’s a professional hunch. Isn’t that what profiling is? Educated guesses that are often correct. But it’s more than that. “You look at my mouth when I talk,” he says. He’s not condescending you but he can’t help laughing.

“You look at mine,” you say.

“I do.” He meets your eyes. You smile without shyness back at him, but there’s apprehension in your eyes that he wasn’t expecting. “What’s wrong?” he asks.

“Jack’s coming up the hill, but he can’t carry his bike.”

Aaron winces. Sure enough, Jack’s at the bottom of the hill (which isn’t a very big hell, just Jack is still quite small) grunting with the effort it takes to drag his bike behind him.

“Buddy! Leave it there!” Aaron shouts with another laugh, this one distinctly affectionate. “Come on, don’t make your arms hurt. I’ll get it later.”

Jack drops his bike and rushes up the hill, grass on his knees and dirt on his hands as he drops himself down on Aaron’s leg. “Hi, Mrs. L/N,” he says. It’s a rare occasion where he doesn’t sound happy to see you, “why are you here?”

You turn and point toward the cafe across the intersection just past the fence of the park. “I was right there finishing my coffee when I thought for sure I could see your dad, and I did. So I came to say hello. Why, did you think you were in trouble?”

“No,” Jack says, driving his face into Aaron’s chest with a guilty giggle.

“What do you have to be in trouble for?” Aaron asks him.

“Nothing!” Jack laughs.

“I hope you’re telling me the truth.”

“Dad, I am!”

“You’re not in trouble,” you say. “Just here to talk to your dad, that’s all. He’s good at talking.”

“I know,” Jack says.

Aaron hugs Jack to his chest with one arm. The sun will set soon, and he’s promised Jack they’ll make dinner together, that he’ll let his son do all the dangerous chopping if he’s super careful. He can’t stay here flirting with you forever, as much as he’d like to, but he can’t leave you hanging again â€”what if the next man who sees you in your sundress with your face pressed to your arm gives you the attention you deserve?

“Would you like to get dinner with me?” Aaron asks you.

“When?” you ask. You don’t miss a beat.

“When are you free?”

“Anytime after three thirty,” you say. “Well, except for Wednesdays. That’s when I host craft club.”

He holds in a smile. “What are your plans this Friday?”

You shake your head, your own smile pressed into an excited line. “Nothing. I’m not doing anything.”

“Thenâ€¦ it’s a date.”

You press your hand to your cheek. “Okay.”

He could tell you what you’re thinking now, just it might come off smug. And besides, he has a bike to retrieve at the bottom of the hill.

#aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner x y/n #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner fic #aaron hotchner blurb #aaron hotchner drabble #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotchner fanfic #aaron hotchner fanfiction #hotch x reader #hotch #hotch x you #hotch blurb #hotch drabble #criminal minds

535 notes · View notes

sescoups · 1 day

Text

on my knees - choi seungcheol

masterlist

summary: your best friend and roommate is out of the country, and you come home to find nothing short of a disaster. who else would you have called but her brother?

word count: ~9k oops

a/n: I have no fucking clue what happened to me, but I just started writing and then didn't stop for like 4 hours so. here you go. you're welcome and also I'm sorry.

18+ MDNI!! warnings under the cut!

warnings: heavy kissing, seungcheol is the epitome of a Simp, p in v sex, unprotected sex (don't), oral sex (f receiving), slight size kink, let me know if I missed something!

You had been best friends with Sua since you were both six years old. One of the older boys had pushed you onto the ground, wanting to be ahead of you in the line for the slide. Most of the other kids had laughed as tears started pouring down your cheeks, your knee rubbed red and raw and your pretty dress covered in dust and gravel.

“Are you really so immature you can’t even wait your turn?” a small voice had piped up.

Through the haze of your tears, you had seen a pretty black-haired girl kneel down to help you out. She had brushed away the worst of the dirt from your dress, and leaned in to look at your knee.

“I don’t know much about scrapes,” she said thoughtfully, “but I think you should clean it. That’s what my mom always says to me and my brother.” Then she smiled before standing up and glaring at the boy again. “You’re a poopyhead, and I will never play with you.”

Thinking back on it as adults, you always laughed at her phrasing; even more amusing was the way the little boy had taken Sua’s comment way too seriously and tried to fight her in the playground. Before any of the adults had been able to intervene, Sua’s older brother had stepped between the two of them menacingly, arms crossed across his chest. He was three years older, so the other boy quickly back-tracked when faced with Seungcheol’s nine-year old frame. After the little boy had run away out of fear, crying, the two siblings had helped you off the ground and to your parents.

The rest was history; playdates as children, study dates in middle and high school, and spending every single summer vacation together. You had gone from climbing trees to shopping at the mall, and from learning the alphabet to crying your way through chemistry together. Well, you more than her, but still. The suffering was mutual.

Your dynamic remained largely unchanged throughout the years. You were the crier, and Sua was the fixer. You hated the way you cried at the smallest inconveniences, and often felt bad for Sua for having to fix it, but she always said it was cute. She said you were just like that, and that was okay. Sua had her own quirks, mainly being quick to anger - you reassured her that you didn’t mind holding her back from fights and silencing her before she could yell insults at undeserving people, so really, you were the same. Just, you know, in a different way.

Another thing that never really changed was the way Seungcheol took care of the both of you. He helped out with homework when he could, taught Sua how to fight (truly a dubious decision considering her anger, but that was his business and not yours), and scared away any icky boys that were mean to you.

It was a very different dynamic to how other siblings seemed to act, but since you were an only child, you wouldn’t really know. Though, to be fair, he seldom held back the snarky comments when the opportunity presented itself. He would roll his eyes whenever you cried, call Sua an idiot when she didn’t understand a math problem, and generally be a dick when you played games together. It was all in good fun, you supposed.

Now, being 24 years old and two years out of college, Sua was your roommate and your rock. She was the one who put up with your generally messy habits and lack of cooking acumen, and she only complained once a month or so. In return, you were the one to make sure bills were paid on time and keep the freezer stocked with ice cream during the hot summer months. A symbiotic relationship, if you’d ever seen one.

You saw significantly less of Seungcheol, though he was far from an uncommon fixture in your household. He knew the code for the keypad on the door, so sometimes he just showed up unannounced to raid your kitchen and take a nap on your couch, but you didn’t mind. He did tend to fix anything that was broken and clean up whatever you couldn’t be bothered to, so the transaction was fair in your opinion.

One fateful Tuesday, you received a call during your lunch break at work. Usually, you wouldn’t answer, preferring to take your 45 minutes to scroll down your social media feeds aimlessly while eating your food, but Sua had always had special privileges, so you picked up anyway.

“Hey, sorry, I know I’m interrupting your scheduled vegetable time,” she started, and you snorted in response.

“I am not eating anything with vegetables in it, and I think you know it.” You were opening the store-bought lunchbox while speaking, your phone tucked between your elbow and your cheek.

“If I didn’t cook you dinner every day, you would have scurvy,” she shot back without a second’s hesitation. “No, dumbass, I meant your own brain-turning-to-vegetable time. Duh.”

“Oh, that,” you replied, unphased by her insults and generally snarky tone. You were used to it. And also kind of deserved it.

“Yeah. Well anyway, something came up at work and I’m gonna have to take an unscheduled work trip.”

“Cool. Where to?”

“Tokyo, so not that far,” she sighed, and you could picture her running her fingers through her hair. She never did well with unexpected travel plans. “I have to leave tonight. I just thought I’d let you know, so you can make plans to get takeout tonight.”

You scoffed down the line, placing a forkful of bulgogi in your mouth and chewing quickly. God bless convenience store lunchboxes. “I know how to take care of myself, mom.”

“Don’t talk with your mouth full, you slob.” Again, you could picture Sua’s nose crinkling in disgust. “I’m kidding, by the way. I know you can take care of yourself. Just letting you know I’m leaving so you don’t think I’ve been kidnapped or killed or something.”

“Thank God I don’t have to deal with the paperwork for a missing person,” you deadpanned and took a drink of your Sprite. “No but for real, enjoy the trip. I’ll be fine, and so will you.”

“Thanks,” your best friend sighed back. “I’ll be back in a week or so. I’m gonna go home and pack now, so if anything’s a mess when you get home- actually, nevermind. That doesn’t bother you at all. Bye.”

“Hey-” you started to protest, but the line went dead and you rolled your eyes.

Well. At least now you could have sushi for dinner without having to listen to Sua complain about the smell of raw fish.

You were so ready to become a couch potato as soon as you came home. One of the new employees at work, Jun, had screwed up a pretty important document, so you’d had to stay late and help him fix it. It wasn’t his fault, he was still new, but you were tired nonetheless. You took your shoes off by the door and turned the lights on in the kitchen, placing the bag of takeout on the counter before you heard it.

The water.

You had never had any issues with the pipes in your apartment, but something had obviously gone wrong with the pipes under the bathroom sink, because the floor was absolutely flooded. You gasped and shut your eyes tightly for a second, willing the problem to be miraculously gone as soon as you opened them again. Alas, no such luck.

The tears pressed behind your eyes, begging to make their escape. You tried to hold them back as you thought about what to do to solve the problem. The faucet wasn’t on, so it was definitely the pipes. Damn. You thought about calling the apartment management and asking for help, but their turnover time was two days at the best of times, and the office was already closed for the day. You heaved a deep sigh as you settled on the best option you could think of. You pressed the name in your contacts and begged the universe that he would pick up.

“What’s up?”

Seungcheol sounded relaxed and unbothered, and you could hear the chatter of a TV in the background. You hated to bother him, but hey, it was his little sister’s apartment too. You cleared your throat to try and get rid of the thickness in your throat brought on by the tears.

“Hey, Cheol,” you began, and you heard him sit up immediately and pause whatever was playing on the TV.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?”

He sounded worried; he usually only called you an endearment when he was worried or teasing you. Clearing your throat had evidently not been enough to get rid of the tears in your voice. Some of them finally escaped in tracks down your cheeks, and you swore, leaning your forehead against the doorframe.

“So uh, I just got home, and Sua isn’t here because she’s in Tokyo and I-”

“Y/N, I don’t care about Sua right now. I know she’s fine, she landed half an hour ago. What’s going on with you?”

“The guest bathroom is flooded, like completely, and I don’t know what to do.”

You heard the rustling of clothes and what sounded like keys jingling through the phone. “Jesus Christ, I thought you were fucking dying,” Seungcheol scolded, and you hiccupped a little, apologizing. “No, don’t worry darling, I’m coming over to help, okay?”

“Okay.”

You were sniffling, and you heard him curse under his breath. You hung up after a quick goodbye, and then you were left alone with the mess again. Looking closer, you realized that the bath mat was soaked along with a towel left on the floor. You sighed and took your socks off, deciding to do something productive while waiting for your knight in shining armor.

You took a picture and sent it to Sua, who replied immediately with a bunch of question marks and swear words directed to the apartment management. She also realized they would be no help at this hour. Great.

Once the soaked bath mat and towel were hung up and dripping into the tub as opposed to the flooded floor, you started clearing out some of the decorations that were taking up floor space. There was a giant plant, two laundry baskets, and a really heavy wooden dresser that held all your clean towels - you didn’t want the wood to rot.

You heard the door open while you were in the process of moving the plant. Honestly, you should have waited for Seungcheol to move this one; the plant was heavy as fuck and really awkward to carry, and you could feel your back protesting before you had even gotten it outside of the bathroom.

“What the hell, Y/N.”

The voice was closely followed by a pair of hands grabbing the plant from you and heaving it outside of the door in mere seconds. Showoff.

“Are you okay?” Seungcheol asked after placing the plant down on a towel, grabbing your upper arm gently. You nodded, and he sighed, squeezing your arm. “Let’s see the- oh fuck.”

You couldn’t help it, you started laughing. Hysterically. The bathroom floor was covered in two inches of water, and the sound of more spraying out was echoing off the walls. Your best friend’s brother glared at you for two seconds before he started laughing too. It wasn’t funny, but it kind of was. How had this even happened? And how had Sua not seen anything when she was home to pack?

“Sorry, Cheol,” you giggled, wiping under your eyes to get rid of the tears that were still falling. Typical. “I, uh, wanted to move the plant and the dresser to make more room and-”

“Darling, that plant was almost heavier than you are. Not to mention that dresser. What were you thinking?”

His voice soothed your panic. He had been solving your problems for the past eighteen years, after all; this was nothing he couldn’t handle. He looked ruffled, you realized. He had been relaxing after a long day at work when you called, and had gotten to your apartment as fast as he could just to help you. And now he was here, being all nice and caring and calling you sweet names. You felt like a stupid child.

“I-I’m sorry. For calling you, I shouldn’t have, I-”

“Absolutely not. You can call me about anything at any time, you got that?” he asked sternly, gazing directly into your eyes. You swallowed, but nodded. His words gave you unwelcome butterflies, the intensity of his gaze making you look away.

“Got it,” you replied when a nod didn’t seem to be enough for him. “Uhm, so how do we deal with this?”

For a moment, the only sound you could hear was the steady spray of water coming from under the sink. You realized that all the products underneath would be useless now, and you would probably have to change out the entire cabinet housing the pipes. You felt a migraine start a steady throb against your temples, and you deflated even more, resting against the doorway.

“It’s okay, I’ll fix it for you, darling,” Seungcheol said softly, pulling you in for a hug. Your stomach erupted in butterflies again. You seriously needed some psychological help. “Just go change, okay? You must be exhausted.”

You shook your head, but relented when he lifted an eyebrow at you. You went to your room and closed the door. For a moment, you just stood there, staring at nothing. Your bathroom was flooded. And your best friend’s brother was helping you fix it, calling you sweet nicknames and saying shit straight out of a romance novel - as if your dumb crush on him needed any more encouragement. You sunk onto the edge of your bed for a moment, just breathing deeply and blinking back more tears. Enough was enough.

When you were fourteen or so, you’d had a crush on Seungcheol. Who wouldn’t? He was tall, pretty, smelled good, and helped you with your homework. Ever since then, it would come and go, usually at the most inopportune times. You appreciated his looks pretty often, particularly when he came over to fix stuff for you and Sua, but you tried not to think about it much - mostly out of self preservation. He was still pretty, still nice, still smelled good, and whenever you let your mind wander for more than five seconds, you knew you were in danger.

You definitely should get it under control. First of all, he had known you since you were six. He had seen all your weird phases, watched you find your own identity, and that came with some really cringy stuff. Additionally, you were his little sister’s best friend. You had some loyalty to her, sure, but more than anything you were sure that he saw you as an extra sister or something. Considering the amount of time you had spent at their house growing up, that would only be logical.

Armed with the reminder of why he would never be into you, you shook it all off. You located your regular home attire - bike shorts and a big t-shirt which origins you forgot - and put your hair up and out of your face. Then you steeled yourself again, vowing not to cry at the sight of the water, and walked back towards the accursed bathroom.

You found Seungcheol on his knees in front of the open cabinet from where the water came. He was hunched over, hand in front of him to block some of the water and seemingly looking for something. His white t-shirt had been sprayed with water, and it was sticking to his chest. You gulped at the sight, repeating that he saw you as an annoying crybaby to yourself in order to stop the stupid butterflies that had seemingly taken up permanent residence in your guts.

“Do you need a flashlight or something?” you asked timidly, making him look up at you. He paused and blinked at you once, twice, before clearing his throat and nodding. You got out your phone and turned the flashlight on, carefully stepping in behind him so as not to splash him.

“I, uh, think we need to remove this middle shelf from the cabinet,” he said, having positioned himself to shield you from the spray.

“Alright,” you replied, placing your phone to the side and leaning to grab the shelf before being stopped by one of his hands. He had placed it carefully on bare skin so as not to get your clothes wet. Damn him. “What? I’ll just grab it and get it out of the way for you.”

He scoffed. “You’ll get wet.”

Now it was your turn to blink at him stupidly, eyes wide and questioning. You could feel your cheeks burning, as did your arm where his hand was resting. This stupid, stupid man was going to make you fall in love with him, and that just couldn’t happen. At all.

“Who cares, Cheol? It’s just water. Let me get it out of your way, and I’ll hold the flashlight again, okay?”

He grimaced, but let go of your arm. You grabbed both sides of the shelf and lifted it. It took a bit of pressure, but eventually it came loose. You backed up slowly and brought the shelf over the tub with the soaked bath mat and dirty towel. Gross.

Even though you had been fast, Seungcheol had been right; your entire torso was soaked with water. You decided that you could do something about it after the leak was dealt with, and so you just ignored it and grabbed your phone again. Your friend was staring at your front with a wrinkle between his brows, mouth open a little, and you rolled your eyes affectionately.

“Cheol.” He looked up at you. “It’s fine. I know you wanted to shield me or whatever, but it’s just a shirt. Now please, help me solve this?”

He nodded wordlessly and turned back to the considerably more spacious cabinet, taking a deep breath. His pout was cute, and you hated your heart for beating faster at the sight of him.

Seungcheol seemed to finally have found what he was looking for, and reached into the cabinet. You altered the angle of the light to make sure he could still see what he was doing despite the shadow of his arm. He grabbed ahold of something and started tugging, his biceps flexing distractingly and his eyebrows screwing up in effort. You were definitely not holding the flashlight in a particularly helpful way anymore, but thankfully your helper didn’t seem to mind.

After a second or two the water slowed before stopping completely, and you cheered out loud. The sound had somehow become grating after only an hour, and the silence was very much welcome. Seungcheol stood up with a wince, holding a hand to his back like an old man. Without thinking, you pulled him into you and gave him a bear hug. You felt tears prick at your eyes again, but held them back. You were just so grateful to have him.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

You felt him laugh against you before he wrapped an arm gently around you and returned the hug. You pressed your cheek to his chest, just standing there and enjoying the embrace for a while before your brain would inevitably come back online. You felt his chin press against the top of your head for a second before he pulled away suddenly.

“Shit, sorry, I’m all-”

“I said I don’t care, stupid,” you scoffed, but your cheeks were definitely getting red now. How could you have just grabbed him like that? And embraced him? You would have cried if you hadn’t been so tired your head felt like it was full of cotton.

Now that you thought about it, you were extremely tired. It felt like a movie effect, the way your blood pressure just suddenly dropped and you swayed to the side. You were expecting a splash and a very uncomfortable kiss with the tile floor, but instead you found yourself back in Seungcheol’s arms. Oh.

Again with the stupid romance novel shit. The universe was testing you for sure. How were you supposed to resist him, really? You were doomed. Even the thought of your infatuation with him being one-sided could no longer bring you back down to the ground. You were simply fucked.

“When was the last time you ate anything?”

And he cares? Fuck the universe, seriously.

“Uhm, I think it was lunch. I stayed pretty late at work, so-”

“Please tell me you have food.”

“Y-Yeah. It’s uh, it’s on the counter in the kitchen.”

Without hesitation, the man picked you up and carried you into the kitchen. Your heart was going crazy, as were the butterflies in your stomach. You were at a loss for words, just going limp in his arms as he brought you to the dining table and placed you on one of the chairs gingerly. You continued to simply blink at him as he disappeared back into the hallway and came back with his hoodie, pulling it over your head before disappearing into the kitchen.

You wanted to scream and kick your feet, because was this man even real? You had no idea how you had deluded yourself into thinking your feelings toward him were sisterly, because currently, your pussy was screaming for him to come ruin you. And honestly? Both your heart and your head kind of agreed at this moment. You were so screwed.

When he came back with your sushi all plated and a glass for the drink you had bought, you couldn’t help but let the tears come back. You hated that you were so weepy, especially in front of a man you apparently were head over heels for, but it was just who you were. You were sad? You cried. Happy? Cried. Angry? Waterworks. You were helpless to it, and apparently to him, too.

“Good job picking up food on the way back home,” he teased, placing the plate in front of you. Then he poured your drink into your glass for you, promptly ignoring the way you were wiping your cheeks with the sleeve of his hoodie.

“Shut up, I’m an adult,” you pouted back. He snorted loudly and sank into the chair opposite you, looking at you as you picked up your chopsticks and got ready to eat.

“Sometimes, maybe,” he drawled with a smirk. You glared at him, but your teary eyes had little to no effect, and you knew it. “I’m kidding, baby. I know.”

He was still studying your face as you placed the first piece of heaven into your mouth, sighing happily and smiling in delight. It made him smile, too, and you could have died at the sight of his dimples. At this point, you had just accepted the butterflies and their claim to your stomach; doing anything else seemed futile.

“I’m sorry I’m so weepy, Cheol,” you said between bites, pouting a little. He shook his head but you interrupted him before he could speak. “No, really. There was no reason to cry so much, or so many times, but I just- I don’t know. I literally got home right before I called you, and that was, what? At around-”

“9.30.”

“Yeah,” you sighed, leaning back in your chair and tilting your head back in exhaustion. “9.30. I’m just tired, is what I’m trying to say.” You sat back up and huffed, sending him an embarrassed smile.

“And what I’m trying to say,” Seungcheol said while you readjusted the sleeves of his hoodie, “is to not worry about it. I know you’re an emotional person, but that’s okay.” He paused for a second, smiling when you almost dropped your sushi into the soy sauce. “Being emotional is just a tiny part of who you are. You excel at so much; it’s okay to have a few flaws. We all do, I promise. Besides, being emotional isn’t really a flaw, it’s just part of being human.”

At this, you couldn’t help but laugh a little. First of all, he was way too well-spoken to be a man in his twenties. Second of all, if he was implying that he, of all people, had any flaws, he was dead wrong. You had never seen him fail at anything, had never seen him do something awkward, even as a child. God, you wished he had, because maybe then he could have remained the brother of your best friend instead of becoming so incredibly meaningful to you.

“As if you have any flaws,” you mumbled, sticking another piece of food in your mouth. At least the sushi was good.

“Oh please, sweetheart. I’m twenty-seven and single. There’s plenty wrong with me.”

You shook your head vehemently. “Being single is not a flaw, you dummy. It’s just a relationship status. Who cares.”

“As if that’s all it is,” he laughed back.

“Okay, so the fact that I’m single reflects badly on me? ” you asked, raising an eyebrow. “Good to know.”

Your plate was empty, and your chopsticks were resting on the edge of it. The only sound in the apartment was a steady, slow drip from the drying bath mat in the bathroom. You were staring at one another from across the table. Why the tension suddenly was so thick was anyone’s guess. All you knew was that the air in your little kitchen suddenly felt suffocating.

“You’re single?” he asked after a while, and you laughed a little.

“Yeah, Cheol.”

“What about that dude, what was his name… Mingyu?”

“Ew,” you said, wrinkling your nose. “God no. We went on like, one date and then decided it was weird to be anything other than friends. He feels more like a brother than anything.”

“What about Chan?”

“Wh- Chan? That was four years ago,” you laughed, shaking your head. At the curious tilt of his head, you kept going: “He was fine, we just got stressed during college and broke up. It happens.”

Something about this line of questioning felt momentous, for a few reasons. One, he was inquiring about your dating life, a topic the two of you generally never talked about. Two, he remembered the name of potential partners that had been in your life, even ones that hadn’t stuck around for long (or at all, in Mingyu’s case). And three… the way he looked at you was different. There was something in his gaze that you couldn’t place, something you didn’t know if you dared hope for.

“Well he’s obviously an idiot,” Seungcheol said under his breath. You were probably not supposed to hear it, but you did. Your heart stuttered in your chest as he looked at you guiltily, as if he had done something wrong. “I just meant that- uhm.”

A few seconds passed in silence. You barely dared to breathe. You were hoping he would keep going, hoping he would clarify before your thoughts went way too far again. The tension was so thick it could have been cut with a knife. Finally, he let out the heaviest sigh you’d ever heard.

“No, you know what, I meant it. He was an idiot for breaking up with you, because anyone would be lucky to have you.”

Time stopped. What do you say after that? You wanted to scream with joy and jump his bones, of course, but you couldn’t exactly do that. What if he didn’t mean it like that? If he didn’t feel the way you hoped he was implying? Because he, or more specifically his sister, was such a huge part of your life, and awkwardness was just not an option.

“Are-” you started, but blinked and started over. “Are you… serious?”

“Of course I am, Y/N.” He sounded almost exasperated. He ran a hand through his slightly damp hair, making it fall over his forehead in the most attractive way you had ever seen. Fucking. Unfair. “I’m not- I mean. I get it if you don’t feel the same or anything, but-”

“Feel what, exactly?” When he stared at you in confusion, you elaborated. “Please be clear with me, Cheol. I don’t want to keep guessing.”

It had come out as a whisper, but he had heard you. His expression softened, and the wrinkle between his brows disappeared. His mouth was slightly open as he seemingly looked for the right words. Your heart was beating out of your chest, and you almost felt it in your throat.

“Baby,” he started, and it made your breath hitch. “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone as dense as you are.”

“Hey!”

“No, seriously,” he kept going, not a single trace of evidence that he was joking, “do you actually mean to tell me you don’t know how I feel about you?”

“Look, I don’t-”

“I guess you don’t, and in that case, that’s my bad.” He got up from his chair and rounded the table, crouching next to your chair and grabbing your hand. “I am so ridiculously into you, it’s not even funny. Sua literally won’t stop teasing me about it, neither will my parents or my friends. No matter how hard I try I can’t stop thinking about you, but I’m honestly not sure I would want to even if I could. You mean so much to me, Y/N, and I really don’t want to be overbearing but I- fuck, I can’t-” he shuts his eyes in an attempt to collect himself, “I love you, baby, and if you don’t feel the same that’s fine, but I at least need you to know that I’m on my goddamn knees for you.”

Your glass, still containing some of your soda, toppled over from the force with which you left your chair. The way you threw yourself at Seungcheol forced him back, but you took the opportunity and placed yourself in his lap as you kissed him deeply. It took him half a second to respond, but then he was kissing you so ardently that you never wanted him to stop.

His arm wrapped around you from behind and pressed you to his chest. You could not give less of a shit that he was sprawled on your kitchen floor, or that you were down there with him, because you were kissing him. You were kissing the man that you most definitely had been in love with since you were a teenager, and fuck did it feel good.

“I, uh, take it you feel the same, then?” he asked after having reluctantly pulled away. You pressed your forehead to his.

“I bet that I have loved you longer.” You were breathing heavily, already missing the feeling of his lips on yours.

“Absolutely not,” he replied before kissing you again.

This time, you couldn’t hold back. You nibbled gently on his lower lip before soothing it over with your tongue. Seungcheol groaned deep in his chest and brought his left hand into your hair, pressing you even closer to him. He opened his mouth, letting your tongue tangle with his, and you felt the way he became jelly underneath you. You were not faring much better, your panties hot and sticky and your hands shaking. Despite this, you snaked one hand into his hair and tugged on it; his hips jumped in response, the action seemingly completely involuntary. You didn’t think you’d ever experienced anything hotter.

“Please, baby,” he heaved as you trailed your lips down his neck, “I can’t take it.”

You rolled your hips against his slowly, and that seemed to be his breaking point. He rolled you underneath him before standing up and taking you with him, carrying you into your bedroom while you followed the shape of his jaw up to his ear with your mouth. A shudder streaked through him as you sucked on the spot behind his left ear, his arms tightening around you and a hoarse moan leaving him.

You barely noticed him closing your bedroom door, only brought back to reality by the sensation of falling when he dropped you on your bed. You whined at the loss of contact, which made him smile; he loved the way you craved him, because honestly, he felt the exact same way about you. So he was quick to cover your body with his, his lips back on yours with a shuddered sigh from the both of you.

He felt so big above you, and yet you felt so safe. Not once had he done anything to hurt you. In fact, he had always been the one to take care of you and prevent you from being hurt. (Along with Sua, but you didn’t really want to think about her at that moment). His weight on top of you made you shudder in delight, your hands starting to wander. You played with the hem of his white t-shirt, still damp from the earlier bathroom catastrophe, but you didn’t care at all. All you wanted was to feel his skin against yours.

He was breathing as if he had run a marathon when he pulled away from your lips. He stared into your eyes, looking for any sign of reluctance, but not finding any.

“Are you sure, darling?” he asked, and your heart swelled about three sizes.

“I’m so sure, Cheol. Please, please, I need you.” You were properly whining now, but you were far past caring.

“Okay baby, okay,” he breathed, pulling away to get his shirt up and over his head. He was about to lay back over you, but froze and let his eyes wander your body. He shut his eyes, his forehead wrinkling once again as he took a few deep breaths. “You in my hoodie and underneath me, I can’t- Y/N, baby, I need a second, I’m so-”

You giggled a little before grabbing the hem of said hoodie, pulling it up and over your head. Apparently, that didn’t help, as Seungcheol’s grip on the sheets tightened and he cursed under his breath.

“I thought this would be better,” you said in confusion, blinking up at him.

“I’m actually going to die,” he gritted out, sounding as if he was genuinely in pain. “I don’t think you realize what seeing you in a wet t-shirt did to me earlier, sweetheart. What it’s doing to me now is just torture.” You flushed at his words, having forgotten that little detail. “Wait. Is that my shirt?” You glanced down and flushed even more when you realized it must be. “Fuck, gonna be the death of me, gonna fucking-”

He cut himself off by pressing his lips against yours again. Your head immediately got fuzzy again, the only thought you could formulate being that of his dick inside of you. When he ground his hips against yours and you felt the outline of it, you let out the most sinful moan Seungcheol has ever heard, which caused his hips to keep grinding into you without his brain’s permission. You disconnected your lips from his for just long enough to pull your wet shirt off your alarmingly hot body, and the man on top of you didn’t even have the strength to look at you without a shirt. He might actually have came in his pants if he did.

You didn’t even mind, because you finally had his skin pressed against yours. The heat of him poured over you, driving you absolutely insane and making you whimper against his lips. If he didn’t do something in the next minute, you would just have to take care of yourself.

“Cheol-”

“Please say it again,” he begged, his lips trailing down your neck toward your breasts.

“Cheol,” you sighed, and he moaned against your skin, his dick grinding perfectly against your clit even through four layers of fabric. You barely recognized your own sounds even as you felt them leave your lips, so high on his proximity you couldn’t have produced a thought if you tried.

When you repeated his name one more time he finally closed his lips around your right nipple, his deft fingers playing with the other and his cock still pressing deliciously against your pussy. Your hips lifted to grind back on him, and he actually whined for you.

“Seungcheol,” you whined, and his only response was a harsh thrust of his hips and another whine. “Please, take my shorts off, I need you to fuck me so bad.”

He let go of your nipple, chuckling as he looked into your eyes and dragged his hands down to rest on your hips. “Want these off?” he asked, flicking the elastic of your bike shorts against your skin. You nodded frantically, pressing your hips up into his again. He looked like he wanted to protest, so you decided to do the only logical thing and beg for his cock.

“Cheol, please please please, take my shorts off? I need it, please,” you begged, your eyes big and innocent as you stared into his. “I want your cock, baby, want it inside me, please.”

Honestly, it was no surprise that his confident facade crumbled along with his will to tease you any longer. If he was telling the truth, and you had no reason not to believe him, he had been in love with you for a long time. You had played dirty by begging him for his cock when he had already been on the verge of losing his mind - especially with those big, innocent eyes of yours. How was he supposed to say no to you?

“Evil, evil woman, fuck,” he muttered to himself as he all but tore the shorts down your legs along with your panties.

The sight of you, his absolute dream, naked beneath him made him believe in God for two whole seconds, for who could have accomplished something like you but an almighty deity? He must have shaped you with his own two hands, he thought, before coming back to his senses and thinking that no, you were a creation of your own. No one but you could have accomplished something like you.

With very little preamble, Seungcheol lowered himself between your thighs, kissing up the inside of each thigh as he went. He looked up and met your gaze, and you had never seen a more erotic sight. Sure, other people had gone down on you before, but none of them had been Seungcheol; none of them had been the one that counted. His big brown eyes met yours, and you swore you saw raw hunger in them.

“May I, baby? Please?”

“You- You’re begging to eat me out?” you asked, in complete and utter shock. You had figured this was somewhat of a chore to him, something that needed to be done both to woo you and to prep you for his cock. One look at his glazed eyes had you changing your mind.

“Yes,” he said without hesitation. His voice was hoarse and his eyes desperate, that simple look giving you enough material for many fantasies in the future. “Please, let me eat you out?”

What were you supposed to do, say no? Absolutely not. You simply nodded at him, and he fucking dove for it. His tongue explored your folds gently but firmly, and as soon as the flavor of you met his taste buds, he was in heaven. His hips ground into the mattress of their own volition as he was lapping at you, his tongue mapping you out and figuring out what brought you the most pleasure.

Seungcheol’s eyes were shut in pleasure, your juices covering his chin all the way up to his nose, but he couldn’t think of anything better. He wanted to drown in you, on his stomach between your legs, or - if he was allowed to dream - underneath you while you were grinding all over his face, taking all the pleasure you could from him.

You weren’t exactly complaining, either. His tongue felt divine, moving to gently circle your clit before he sucked it into his mouth. When your fingers tangled in his hair, tugging in pleasure, your lover let out a grunt that sent vibrations traveling through your entire body.

“F-Fingers, Cheol, please-”

He just grunted an affirmative and pressed his middle finger into you slowly. The warmth surrounding his finger drove him insane, making his hips press harder against the mattress and his eyes squeeze tighter. Having something to clench down on brought your pleasure to even greater heights, and you started to feel the familiar tightening signaling your release. You had felt the outline of his dick earlier, and you knew you would need another finger to make him fit.

“Another, I need you to fit later, baby.”

Your voice came out shaky, but the man consuming your pussy like it was the best meal he’d ever had didn’t seem to mind. He simply let his ring finger join his other inside you, grunting when he felt how tight you were around him. The tightening in your lower belly grew more and more intense by the second, the filthy noises of Seungcheol devouring you bringing you that much closer to the edge. You let out a mewl that sounded like it came straight from a porno, and felt his grip tighten on your thigh.

“I’m so close, baby, so close, please-”

“Come for me,” he growled hoarsely before resuming his delicious torture of your clit.

You followed his request a second later, moaning loudly and squirming around on the bed. His free hand pressed down over your hips to keep you still as he coaxed you through it, and he didn’t stop until the overstimulation almost hurt.

His fingers left your pussy gently, absolutely covered in your slick. You blushed as he put them in his mouth, moaning at the flavor as if you were the best thing he’d ever tasted. And to him, you were. He would remember the flavor of you until the day he died.

Your chest was rising and falling as you gulped down air. The way Seungcheol couldn’t help but grind into the mattress again made you want to cry, because how could he be so perfect? And how could he want you, of all people?

When he kissed you again, you could taste yourself on his lips and tongue, and you loved it. It was a reminder of just how voraciously he had just eaten you out, and you took the opportunity to reach down and cup him over his underwear. He hissed and pulled his hips back, panting already.

“I- you can’t.”

“But, baby I just want to return the favor-”

“My love, if you touch me again I can’t guarantee that I will have faculties to be inside you.”

His words made you laugh, both because of how ridiculous his phrasing was, but also because of the effect you seemed to have on him. Had he really been driven so far by making out with you and making you cum? It seemed like it.

“I love you so much,” you ended up breathing out. He gazed into your eyes so adoringly you felt like time stopped again.

“I love you more, Y/N.”

His response prompted you to kiss him, and he deflated on top of you. As he sunk further into your embrace, his still-covered dick brushed against your wet core, and the whine he let out was almost pathetic.

“I hate to ruin the moment, but please, let me be inside you now. I think I’ll die if I can’t,” he confessed. You laughed out loud again before nodding, kissing and sucking a trail down his neck while he removed his boxers. “Condom?”

“I don’t have any, but I have an IUD and I’m clean.” You could practically see Seungcheol’s brain grind to a halt. “But, I mean, if you don’t want to we can just wai-”

“No!” he almost yelled, his entire face flushing pink. “No, I’m clean too, and I- fuck, I would love to be inside you without a condom.”

You nodded, and he took a deep breath. The thought of having him inside you without a barrier excited you to no end, and it seemed he felt the same. You kissed him passionately again while he lined himself up with your core, and moaned through a sigh as he pushed into you. He didn’t have a monster cock or anything, but it was still bigger than what you were used to taking.

As he bottomed out, he let out a punched out sigh. You could feel him shaking on top of you, and did your best not to move or clench down on him. Unfortunately, your pussy didn’t exactly obey you and clenched down anyway. It made Seungcheol’s breath hitch, and he squeezed his eyes shut tight so as not to look at you while he was trying not to cum.

“I swear,” he wheezed, “you are going to kill me.”

His words made you chuckle, which in turn made him groan and bury his face in the crook of your neck. You were ready for him to move, and told him as much, but he still needed a second. You could feel tears sting the corners of your eyes, as per usual feeling weepy as soon as you felt a big wave of emotion. To distract yourself, you locked your lips with his and kissed him with all the passion you had left to give.

As your tongue tangled with his he groaned low in his throat, and his hips thrust into you of their own accord. Once he had started, he couldn’t stop, and you didn’t want him to. He started out fairly slow, taking his time to make sure you weren’t hurting at all. Then you accidentally clenched down on him, and he could no longer hold back.

He started pounding into you, his cock reaching the deepest parts of you and making you dizzy. You moaned out every time the tip of him hit the spongy spot inside you, and you couldn’t help the way you were clenching around him. You were hurtling toward your end so fast it was almost alarming. He filled you up so perfectly, so perfectly thick and long, it was as if you were made for one another.

Seungcheol was mumbling an endless stream of praise, grunting every time your cunt squeezed him a bit tighter. He felt like he was in heaven, your slick walls molded around him in a way that made him mourn the time spent doing anything other than this. He wanted to keep you like this, impaled on his cock and making you feel as good as you ever had.

Sadly, he was so wound up he wouldn’t be able to last as long as he usually did. While he didn’t blow immediately as he had been worried he would, he started feeling his balls drawing up around five minutes in. The way your nails were scratching down his back wasn’t helping his situation.

In an effort to save himself from cumming before you, he lowered a hand to circle the nub of your clit gently. The extra stimulation was exactly what you needed to build the rest of the way to the edge, and you tangled your hands in his hair as your thighs shook.

“Please, Cheol, baby, I’m gonna-”

“Oh thank God, please cum around me, baby, wanna feel it,” he begged, and it did the trick.

Your orgasm was spectacular, your entire body feeling like it was on fire as you exploded around him. You were moaning his name, clawing at his back and arching your back to the high heavens. Your toes actually curled. It was the orgasm of orgasms.

Seeing you like that, your eyes rolled to the back of your head as he brought you pleasure was enough for Seungcheol to follow you over the edge. He came so hard he saw nothing but white, his hips stuttering as he spilled himself into you. His face was pressed into your neck, but his moans could not be concealed even if he tried.

You both lay there, panting and soaked in sweat, for a pretty long time before he finally pulled out and rolled off of you. He sprawled on his back and stayed like that, his eyes shut in complete and utter bliss and his heart beating out of his chest. Your hair was an absolute bird’s nest around you, and there were tear tracks running down your cheeks and into your hairline.

You clumsily flopped over to rest against his side, and he pulled you in until your head was resting right over his heart. You slung your bare leg over his waist, and he groaned in what sounded like agony.

“You can’t do this to me,” he whined, and you giggled lightly at him.

“I just put my leg on you, baby,” you said, looking up at him innocently, and he had to shut his eyes for a second and remind himself he wasn’t dreaming. You, yourself weren’t entirely convinced all this wasn’t a dream; and if it was, you never wanted to wake up.

“Okay, well you’ve just seen what seeing you in a hoodie and bike shorts does to me, so,” he reminded you, and you bit back a grin. It was good to know you could tease him easily.

You laid in silence for a while, just listening to his heart beating against his ribcage. Every once in a while it would slow down, and then he would look down at you and it would speed back up. Your heart seemed to match the pace of his, and you found that you loved it that way.

“So, “ Seungcheol started, and you pulled yourself up on your elbow to look at him as he talked. “That… just happened.” You snorted into a laugh, and he joined you, flicking your forehead gently. “I uh, I’m going to a work thing on Friday. I usually don’t bring a date because, well, because I’m usually single, but maybe, this time, I could bring you?”

You blinked at him slowly, admiring him in the light from your bedside lamp. He was pretty no matter what, but with his cheeks glowing and his eyes glittering, he was beyond what was natural, in your opinion. You stroked a bit of his hair behind his ear and hummed.

“I mean, are you not single anymore?” you asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Uhhhh-” he was interrupted by your laughter, and he pouted at you jokingly. “Don’t do that! I get scared I fucked up,” he said and rolled over to wrap his arms around you.

“I’m sorry,” you giggled, “I just don’t know either.” You paused. “Hey Cheol?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to be my boyfriend?”

At your words, his entire face lit up. He started giggling and buried his face in your hair, trying to hide from view. Even still, you knew he would be blushing. His arms squeezed tighter around you as he pulled you even closer, and you didn’t even mind that you couldn’t breathe.

“I was going to ask,” he ended up whining once brain function had returned to him. “Can I?”

“I mean, sure?” you answered, trying your hardest not to just lean in and kiss away his pout. Your willpower sucked, so you did it anyway.

“Great! Hey, Y/N, would you be my girlfriend?”

You bit your lip to hold in your laughter, but all it did was summon your boyfriend’s gaze to your mouth. You released it and broke out into a huge grin, nodding.

“I would love nothing more.”

“So what you’re saying is,” Sua said thoughtfully, “you finally put him out of his misery?”

It was a week later, and you were sitting on your balcony with Sua and drinking coffee. The bathroom floor was now dry, and while the stupid bath mat had been unsalvageable, everything else had been fine. The apartment management had gotten the leak fixed after five days, proving that calling Seungcheol had been the right choice for more reasons than one.

Even thinking about him, you couldn’t help but smile. Your boyfriend. The one who had brought you to a work function as your first date, and the one who had gotten jealous because you had greeted a coworker of his when he was getting you a drink. The one that had helped you save your apartment from water damage. The one you had loved for the past decade.

“Okay but how could I have put him through misery if I didn’t know he liked me, hm?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at your friend. She had her eyes closed, face turned toward the sun like an old lady.

“You cannot be serious,” she said incredulously, turning toward you and opening her eyes wide to show her shock. “You’re telling me you didn’t know Cheol was in love with you? He has been so down bad for you since we were like fourteen, man. He bought you flowers for your graduation. He reminded you to take your allergy pills before going to a dog café.” You flushed a little at your own blindness, but Sua just sighed and turned back toward the sun, her eyes closed again. “At least it will be easy to kill him if he hurts you.”

a/n: if you liked this, please don't forget to like and reblog! <3

masterlist

#svt x reader #seventeen smut #svt #svt smut #seventeen x reader #seventeen fluff #svt fluff #seventeen fic #seventeen fanfic #svt fic #svt fanfic #sescoups writes

363 notes · View notes

macabr3-barbi3 · 2 days

Note

Apologies, first time asking for anything. But what about usually touch avoidant Alastor being intrigued by reader and he begins touching them more and more often that others begin noticing. When called out, he starts doing it more privately but maybe more intimately…? (Just to figure out how he feels about it of course).

Can end however you’d like but I just thought it’d be funny to have confused Alastor and flustered reader. 😅

*little snippet of the idea*

“Well aren’t you pretty as a picture?” He asked lowly. You rolled your head to the side allowing his clawed fingers to reach further. You moaned lightly as his claws scrapped against your scalp, a small line of drool falling from your lips as he continued his slow intoxicating scratches.

“Oh, now that isn’t a sound I would’ve expected to hear from this.” He says chuckling.

You buried your face in his thigh, turning to your growing blush as well as release more of your hair so he could move to another part as he continued his lazy caresses.

“I would’ve expected this more from Husker. But you, you are desperate for some affection aren’t you?” He crooned before his fingers wound on your hair and gave a gentle tug.

You felt your eyes water slightly and you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth as you fought back another low sound. That simple action had changed the simple pleasure to one of a much….darker more interesting one in you and you felt the stirrings of excitement begin to look in your stomach.

“Alastor.” You whimper softly, your eyes closed.

The hand holding your hair opens quickly and you slump down slightly as he released you unexpectedly until you tilt your face up to catch his eyes confused. His smile was seemingly frozen in place as his expression seemed mildly confused.

You blushed realizing what had happened and moved to push yourself off his lap. “I-Im sorry. I shouldn’t have-“ you begin saying before his hand moves to between your shoulder blades and he pushes you down firmly to keep your head in his lap.

“Hush.” He says harshly. His grin more of a snarl now. “I did not say anything to indicate I was done. I was merely….caught off guard.” He said, his tone softening as he spoke. His fingers returned to your head as he resumes slowly carding his claws through the locks gently. His ministrations entrancing as he intermittently scratched, rubbed, or pulled lightly at the strands. “Such a curious little creature.” He murmured as his claws trailed towards your ear. “So easily controlled…far too trusting.” He says as he catches the hair behind your ear in his grip pulling at it gently causing you to gasp.

His grip tightens before he pulls you up to look at him. “You’d allow me to do whatever I pleased to you, wouldn’t you?” He asked lowly, the static overlay on his voice thick. You nodded quickly, tears pricking your eyes at the painful grip in your hair.

But his responding smile eased you slightly before he relaxed his grip allowing you to return to his lap.

“Good girl.”

HELLO ANON FIRST I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THAT THE SNIPPET WAS BEAUTIFUL I SCREAMED WHEN I READ IT 😭

Next: I hope this fits what you were looking for!! I decided to keep it mostly fluffy with some suggestiveness 💕🫶

When Alastor first meets you he doesn’t seem to know what to think of you- another cat demon roaming the streets of Hell that has found its way to the Hotel to join the Princess’ cause, surely. He eyes you similarly to how one might keep a cautious eye on a new pet- just sort of waiting to see what you would do. You watch him watch you across rooms and lobbies, keeping his distance, never getting too close.

Until one day when you’re making tea in the kitchen and he drops a hand on your head, trailing his claws lightly across your scalp like he’s petting you. You drop your cup in shock, and it shatters on the floor as you whirl around, the light dusting of fur lining your arms on end, teeth bared. You force yourself to calm down when you notice its just him, and when you ask him what he was doing he replies, “oh, just sating my curiosity! You looked so fluffy, I simply couldn’t resist.”

But he does it again. And again. Just tiny touches here and there, a hand brushed against your ears, a finger stroking down your tail- you think once you might have imagined that he pushed the pads on the paws of your feet while you slept on a lobby couch. He always sites intrigue as his reasoning for touching you, like he’s testing the waters for… something. He doesn’t deign to tell you what, of course, just emits his staticky little hum after every instance and goes about his day, unaware of the hammering of your heart, the instinctive desire to lean further into his touch. He does it everywhere, almost every day, and despite there almost always being other people in the room no one ever says anything about it.

Then Angel catches you.

Well, catches isn’t the right word- you weren’t doing anything wrong, or scandalous. But when Alastor drifts his hand over your head at the bar one night, a soft scratch behind your ears that makes you smile dreamily, the spider whistles high and loud. “Damn, Smiles, I thought ya didn’t like physical contact! Scratchin’ kitten here behind her ears, this is downright pornographic for you!”

Alastor stiffened at the words, a short burst of static screeching through the air before he vanished, dipping into shadows without another word. Your heart sank and you shot Angel a glare before letting Husk serve you something sweet and tasty that makes your cheeks heat and your limbs loose and tingly.

You ran into Alastor on your way back to your room, and when you lowered your head and made to sneak past him he dropped his hand on your head and scratched behind your ears again, this time placing a hand on your arm to guide you to lean against the wall while he did so. “Perhaps it would be best,” he says lowly, eyes lidded looking down at you, “if we kept this to move private instances, hm? I find that my curiosity is not yet sated, but I don’t relish the idea of others making comments on what should be kept between us. What do you think?”

You would have agreed to anything to keep his claws rubbing at that sweet spot behind your ears, but all you could do was nod, soft enough that his hand isn’t dislodged. “Lovely,” he murmurs, and rubs the thin skin of your ear between two of his fingers. You can’t stop the rumble of your chest as you purr a little at that, and his amused chuckle makes your face heat. “Let’s get you to bed, darling.” He leads you to your bedroom door and drops a kiss on the back of your hand before he fades into the shadows again.

And then he doesn’t touch you at all.

For two weeks.

No hands that brush against your skin or through your fur or across your tail. He sits away from you whenever he can, and when you do manage to snag a seat next to him on occasion he claims he has elsewhere to be and disappears, leaving you upset and twitchy every time. You hadn’t realized how much you had come to enjoy those touches from him, even if he was just doing it to see how he felt about it. You had never noticed him touching anyone else- it had made you feel a little like you were special. But he was avoiding you now, his hands a safe distance away like he was with everybody else.

You lament about it to Husk at the bar one night, a couple drinks in- thinking that, as a cat, he might relate to the touch-starved feeling you were experiencing- before he finally cuts you off and shoos you away, complaining that “I don’t need t’be hearin’ that shit, go bitch to him about it.” You take his advice and slowly make your way up the stairs, only getting lost in the halls twice before you remember where Alastor’s room is and knock lightly on the door.

It takes him so long to answer you almost leave, tail swishing dejectedly on the floor until the door opens and Alastor’s ears perk up at the sight of you. “Hello, dear! What brings you my way so late this evening?”

“Oh, I was just… I don’t know really, I’m-” You cut yourself off, looking down at the floor in sudden, burning shame, ears flattening on your head. “This was stupid, I’m gonna go.”

You’re halted in your turn to leave by a claw-tipped finger under your chin, bringing your eyes up to meet his. “Ahh, I believe I see the issue. Come in, darling, we’ll discuss it.” He takes your hand and leads you into his room, his shadow flicking the door closed behind you.

Alastor settles into his chair by the fire and gestures to the one across from him for you to sit in, eyebrows raising in amusement when, instead of following his gesture you drop to your knees, a whimper escaping as you hit the ground painfully and lean towards him to rest your forehead on his knee. “I see,” he murmurs, and lets his hand brush over your ears, making them twitch. “Heavens, we can’t have this, now, can we? Allow me to rectify the situation for you, dear.” He rubs gently at one of your ears, humming to himself when you tip your head to the side to grant him better access. “I hadn’t realized you felt so neglected- my apologies.”

“It’s fine,” you mutter into the fabric of his slacks. “I didn’t mean t’- ohhh.” Your words devolve into a soft moan when he scrapes his nails against the base of your ears, mouth falling open at the feeling of bliss that it generates.

“Aren’t you just lovely?” He asks, and you can hear the chuckle in his voice. “Who could have guessed a little isolation would put you in such a state- you’re just desperate for some affection, aren’t you?”

“Don’t tease me,” you whisper, eyes clenched shut so you can’t see the expression on his face- one of ridicule, surely. Perhaps this was what he had been curious about- how long it would take before you made a fool of yourself in craving his touch when it was denied after having it freely given for so long.

“Tease you? I would never.” He wraps a strand of your hair around his finger and pulls, gently but enough that your head comes up from his lap, tilting your face in his direction so he can look at you. Eyes still closed, they water at the tension, the faint ache of it pulling at something deep in the pit of your abdomen, twisting the pleasure from something soft into a dangerous, carnal thing.

“A-Alastor,” you whimper softly, hands coming up from where they’ve been pressed into the floor to grip at the fabric of his slacks, wrap around his calf with a gentle grasp. His hand releases immediately, your hair slipping through the fingers and making your head fall limp for a moment before you catch yourself. When you look up at him his smile is tense, brows cocked in a way that implies he’s confused about something and you realize your mistake- you take your hands off him immediately, starting to pull your body away from his. “God I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-”

Alastor reaches for you again, cups your cheek in one hand and brings his other over to twist back into your hair, gently guiding you back down to put your head back in his lap. “Nonsense,” he says, his tone a little rougher now before he clears his throat and looks down at you, something reminiscent of fondness tinting his expression. “I reacted in a manner I didn’t expect- you did nothing wrong.” He lets his clawed fingers card softly through your hairs, scratching and rubbing against your scalp in the most delightful way, making you shiver against him. The hand cupping your cheek brushes a thumb against your face and you lean into it. “So responsive. So trusting.” His voice lowers again, his grip in your hair tightening a fraction before he eases the pressure, resumes his soft stroking of you. “I think I could do just about anything right now and you’d be pleased as punch to allow me, wouldn’t you, dearest?”

“Yes,” you mumble, only half listening to what he’s saying as he continues to touch you, caressing your head and ears and neck with the soft brushes of his fingers and claws. It's lovely, the way that you feel right now- weightless, carefree, taken care of. Why had he stopped for so long? What had you done wrong? “Please,” you say, not really sure what you’re asking for, but ready to beg if needed.

“Ah, good girl,” he says with a soft smile. “We’ll save all that for another evening, hmm? I think you need some sleep for the time being- join me up here, darling.” He uses his hand on your head to guide you up from the floor, standing from the armchair as you do and releasing your hair to slide his arms under your legs and back, lifting you in his embrace. He deposits you onto his sheets, pulling the covers over you. “We’ll talk in the morning- rest well.”

When he moves to step away your hand darts out to grab his wrist- a weak gesture, but enough to halt him in place. “Please stay,” you ask him, not willing to let the touch go quite yet after having been denied for so long.

“I suppose if you insist.” Alastor huffs a sigh but acquiesces, a tendril of shadow reaching across the room to drag his armchair closer to the bed. He takes a seat and resumes his gentle stroking of your ears, occasionally letting his hand run down to brush over your shoulders and the end of your tail where it’s flicking out from under the covers. “Now sleep, dear- sweet dreams.”

You drift off to the soft sensation of his hands on you, Alastor’s staticky hum lulling you into an easy sleep.

#hazbin hotel #ao3 writer #ao3 fanfic #alastor x reader #alastor #x reader #alastor fluff #requests <3 #my stuff <3

217 notes · View notes

leashaoki · 3 days

Text

use me

pairing: sub levi x fem reader

wc: 1.4k

warning: this post includes nsfw content, minors do not interact.

The Captain's formidable nature and cold, callous ways were certainly infamous amongst not only the corps, but all who knew his name. He was unforgiving, ruthless and an expert of his craft: war. Levi was feared amongst his men, even those above him in rank were hesitant to get too close; his aura was one of darkness, a darkness that was to be avoided by most.

That's what made turning Levi into a begging, moaning mess beneath you, all the more enjoyable.

"Please- fuck, I need more..." You watch as his eyes roll back, a particularly lewd whine leaving his lips as you stroke him ever so slowly. Your fingers gently tease the tip as they pass it, swirling under the head and back down to the base. Each movement leaves him more tightly wound, each touch feeling like too much yet not enough at the same time.

Levi's hands are bound by his cravat behind him as he rocks back and forth in his chair, desperately trying to thrust up into your hand for more friction; only to be met with you slowing your pace, much to his dismay. There’s beads of sweat trickling down behind those dark locks, spayed across his forehead. He looks unkempt, much unlike his usual demeanour, his teeth are bared almost as if he’s in pain, brows furrowed upwards and his cheeks a rosy pink.

"If you want more..." You purr, his eyes snapping open at the sound of your voice, "You're gonna have to be a good. Can you do that for me, pretty boy?"

He groans at the term of endearment, pulling his lip between his teeth and nodding desperately. You tilt your head to the side, arching a brow as your hand leaves his cock. The Captain practically whines at the loss of friction, essentially pouting up at you like the insolent brat he is.

"Words, Levi. Come on baby, you can use em, right?" You command lightly, running your fingers through his hair and tugging lightly. Levi's jaw tightens and the soft blush painting his cheeks darkens significantly; the pleasure derived from the pain evident in his expression.

"Shit." His voice is hoarse, strained by the hours of teasing he's endured at your hands. He struggles to string a sentence together, mind hazy with lust, "I'll be good," Levi looks up at you, his intense silver orbs lidded and lips puckered and swollen; his harsh cheekbones look softened as his gaze begs you for more, "I'll be your good boy, just- please- please fucking touch me again."

Your hand returns to his length, pumping faster now as Levi writhes and shivers beneath you; the sound of his scattered breaths and flustered moans fill the room. The noises go straight to your core, intensifying your own arousal.

He tries to fuck into your fist, chasing the feeling that has him whining like a bitch in heat and writhing against his restraints. Levi's eyes flutter closed in his attempt to keep them open, jaw slack and hair messy, gods, how he loves being under your control. He often pondered how a man as demanding as himself could be brought to his knees so very easily; how a certain look from you could have his cock hardening and brain turning to a pile of submissive, slutty mush. Not right now though, the only thing the Captain could think about right now was the feel of your tight, gummy walls clenching around him while you use his cock.

"Fuck me, please-" His words are cut off by a gasp when your fingers dance over the tip, a low growl erupting in his chest afterwards as he attempts to keep his composure, "Please - please baby, wanna make you feel good too." Levi’s whole body is shaking with pure desire, goosebumps painting is pretty porcelain skin.

You comply, stepping back and undressing yourself in front of him. His mouth hangs open, a fire in his dark eyes that burns only for you. Levi tries to steady his breaths, but the sight of your naked form has his breathing staggered and cock twitching. "Gods," He groans, his tongue briefly wetting his lips as he shakes his head in disbelief, "I fucking need you."

Straddling his muscular form, you tease him once more; rubbing yourself against his length and watching as his gaze turns to one of ice. It's only now you see a glimpse of the man he is to everyone else, his expression that of a devil as a growl rips through his throat. Levi's desperation had never been so evident, rutting into you from below at an attempt of slipping inside, biting his lip so hard it looked as if it might tear.

"I swear to fucking god, if you don't- " You finally lower yourself onto his length and his ramblings are cut off by his own lewd whine, brows knitting together in the centre as the look on his face turns to one of pure ecstasy. His mind is swimming in pleasure, drunk off the feeling of your heat around him; he’s looking up at you with so much emotion that it stalls you, lost in his eyes momentarily before proceeding with the task at hand.

Slowly moving yourself up and down on his cock, you bask in the way he's shivering beneath you; his muscular chest rising and falling quickly as his breaths become more uneven. Levi's mumbling an array of praises and thank you's, his tone unrecognisable from the one that barks orders at you during the day. His voice is so soft, so gentle that if someone were to hear the two of you, they would never guess it was humanity’s strongest.

"Use me," Levi's lids squeeze shut briefly before his gaze is locking with yours, swallowing and taking a breath before he begins to beg, "Please, don't...stop. Use me, I’m yours." His eyes are wide, teary and doe like; blinking up at you with his pretty dark lashes.

You increase the speed of your hips, bouncing swiftly on his lap and rolling your body expertly above him. He groans when you pull his head back by his hair, his mouth hanging open and his eyes rolling back once again at the sweet combination of both pain and pleasure. It throws him over the edge unexpectedly and he cries out, "ngh- shit, oh fuck i'm gonna cum."

You smirk and tilt your head condescendingly, pouting a little and taking his jaw in your fingers so your eyes meet, "Can you hold on a little longer for me, hm? I know you can do it, Captain." The use of his title makes him tense up and he nods wildly, his raven locks bouncing as he bobs his head obediently. He squeezes his hands together behind his back as he holds off his impeding orgasm with all his might. He hisses through his teeth, biting down so hard on his lip that he tastes blood in an attempt to stall his ecstasy. You curse when you feel your own climax nearing and Levi's eyes widen at the realisation, a fire blazing in his chest at the thought of making you cum around his cock. He does what he can, rutting his hips up into your sweet spot and whining when he feels you tighten around him, "Please, baby,” Levi begs, his own cock pulsating with the need to fill you up, “I need to feel it - Need to feel you, mmm, ngh- Please, cum, pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease.”

Seeing Levi like this is as close to heaven as you'll get, the way he moans your name like a mantra and his sinful expression twists with pleasure is truly your nirvana. It sends you over the edge and you see white, blinded by the hot pleasure coursing through your veins. Just before you lose all cognitive thought to the ecstasy, you make sure to order Levi through your moans, "Cum for me, baby boy." You barely finish the command before Levi is filling you up, crying out and shivering uncontrollably beneath you. You’re both lost in the feeling, your mouth open in a silent scream and Levi’s wanton moans bouncing off the walls.

It feels like forever before you both come back down to Earth, your lids fluttering open. Levi's eyes meet with yours and a warm, rare smile spreads across his stony features; his gaze filled with admiration as he shifts his head to kiss your chest, your jaw, your cheeks. “Thank you, love,” He murmurs before pressing his lips lovingly against yours.

237 notes · View notes

samandcolbyownme · 3 days

Note

Colby brock argument ending in hate / make up sex

Warnings: SMUT 18+, strong language, mentions of alcohol, arguing, Colby is slightly drunk, reader and Colby are slightly toxic together, unprotected car sex, rough actions, choking, oral (m rec), hair pulling, biting, scratching, dirty and cute pet names, general filth - enjoy 🖤

Word count: 3.1k | not really edited

⤺ based around ⤼

You tried telling yourself that Colby was just going to friendzone you yet again.

Trying to make yourself feel better about the situation you are currently running from - you fooled yourself into thinking you and Colby could settle into a real relationship, basically.

You were at a party, kind of drunk and all you wanted was him.

He looked so good. Smelled so good. You were so excited to find him later, just like he told you to do.

But when the time came around to where you were finally looking for him, that excitement went away quicker than shit when you seen his lips were connected to a dark haired brunette’s.

You were fuming, more towards yourself because you knew how Colby was. You’ve known him long enough now, but you just couldn’t help it.

You left without speaking to him.

A • W E E K • L A T E R

The first two days, Colby was on you about seeing you, wanting to talk to you, blah, blah, blah…

As much as you just wanted to talk to him, you just couldn’t go through the heartbreak. You’ve kept your feelings down for a while now, continued to just fuck through them, but now.. they’re just too much.

So you go for plan b.

Ghosting.

But that all goes to shit when your phone goes off at almost two thirty in the morning. You roll over, lifting it from the bed, squinting at the sudden brightness.

Colby hasn’t texted you in two days, which kind of made you sad, but at the same time, you knew it was for the best, so you weren’t really surprised when you seen it was him that texted you, are you up?

You stare at the text on your lock screen for a few minutes before legging out a sigh, ..no.

You lay your phone back down, stretching as you sit up. You grab your phone and walk over to the bathroom.

As you sit down, you hear your phone vibrate against the counter and you reach over to grab it, I need a ride home.

You sigh, closing your eyes as you pinch the bridge of your nose, “Colby.” You whisper lowly as you shake your head. You look back down at your phone, Are you drunk?

You dreaded asking that question, mainly because Colby likes to be all up on you when he has alcohol in his system - one of the reasons to why you need to cut him our because if he can’t be your boyfriend, then why do boyfriend things with him?

You hated that you wanted to see him, you had the option to right there.

You look down at your phone and smirk little at Colby’s text, ..no.

You laugh slightly, “Fuck.” You sigh as you check his location, You’re at the RailYard Bar, right?

Within a second, Yes mamas, that’s correct.

You looked away from your phone, Colby knew that you absolutely loved when he called you that. He doesn’t do it often, which is what makes it so, special.

Says I’ll be there in ten. I’m not taking anyone else home. Just you. You stand up, finishing up before you go and get changed - just leggings and a hoodie, nothing special.

You grabbed your greys and walked out.

You were nervous. This last week has been hell for you because you absolutely love Colby, with your whole being, and he just can’t seem to see that.

Each time you’ve managed to master hiding your feelings, Colby would break out a new move or saying or just something to make you fall deeper in love with him and all you can think is, for fucks sake, here we go again.

You wanted to hate him, but then you remember just how well he knows your body and just how good he makes you feel.

How he makes you laugh and how he’s just literally always there when you need a pick me up fuck.

He’s just so perfect to you and you just wish he saw you the same.

——

Your heart skips a beat when you seen him walk towards your car. You sat up more, pressing the unlock button right before he grabs the handle to open the door.

“Well, look who it is.” He says as he gets in, “Little Miss likes to ghost her friend? What is that?”

“Oh.. we’re getting right into that, aren’t we?” You stifle back a laugh and start driving. Colby nods, “Yeah, so take the back way. We need to talk.”

“We do.” You agree with the slight nod of your head.

“I just-“ Colby shakes his head, “What changed?”

“What do you m-“

“Don- don’t do that.” Colby laughs slightly, letting out a sigh, “Do you remember that night at the party?”

I think of you so often it hurts, Colby, is what you really want to say, but you just grip the wheel harder, slowing down as you come to a sharper turn, “I remember a lot.”

“That sounds like.. it has another meaning behind it, something more than just how good your memory is so..”

You feel your cheek start to heat, why did I fucking do this, you curse yourself mentally, why fucking put myself through this?

“Y/n.”

“What.” Your voice is barely there, but Colby still hears you, “What the fuck is going on with you?”

There it is.

“I tell you, what? A week ago?” He continues, “That I wanted to talk to you about us and then within a few hours later you ghost me for a fucking week?”

“Can you actually blame me for being scared though?” You scoff, “I mean, I tell you about my feelings one time and we push past it, bury it behind us because you didn’t want anything more than sex.. and even though that fucking hurts, I still fucking did it.”

“No one is forcing you.” Colby argues back, “Fuck, y/n. I don’t-“ he shakes his head, “If all I was doing was making you unhappy.. I- why fucking stay around me then? Like I don’t..”

“Because I’d do anything for you.” You blurt out, word vomit taking over, “Because I never really knew if I was more afraid to see you again or to never see you again.”

He stays silent, eyes on you as he waits for you to continue speaking, he knows you have more to say.

“It just.. at this point.. I know that you’re shitty and you’re bad for me.. but I just.. can’t stop thinking about it.”

“What does all of that even mean?” Colby scoffs, “I’m shitty and bad for you, and yet, you can’t stop thinking about.. what? What the fuck did I do? You’re the one leaving me in the fucking dark.”

You finally snap, “Why are you getting mad at me!?” You glance over at him and back to the road, “The girl. The fucking girl at the party, Colby.”

He shakes his head, eyes still on you as he thinks, and right when you’re about to huff, he nods, “Oohh, are you talking about Alexa?”

“If that was the same girl you kissed when you knew I was going to be looking for you.. then yes.”

You were no stranger to giving Colby attitude, but the atmosphere shifted.

You wanted him.

You wanted to claim him.

A minute or two goes by and you stop the car.

Colby looks at you confused, “The fuck are you doing?”

You look over at him, “you want to talk, we’re talking.”

“I don-“

“The first time I ever told you I had developed feelings, you basically told me just to give that shit a rest.” You start, “So I pushed them down, just kept reminding myself that we’re fuck buddies, nothing more, I mean, you seem to have made that pretty clear and to be honest.”

You clear your throat and look over at him, “Seeing your lips pressed to another woman’s, honestly, I think hurt less than that what you’re we need to stop or we’re just friends speech would have.”

He scoffs slightly, shaking his head as he laughs, “You really don’t know what you’re talking ab-“

“Fucking hell, Colby. I saw you. With my own two eyes. Your hands on her waist. Her hands on your neck. Your lips on hers.” You yell, your voice growing higher, “Fuck.”

“That meant nothing, okay.” Colby shakes his head as he looks out the window.

You scoff, “that meant nothing?” You press your lips together and frown, “so then.. why tell me to find you later wh-“

“Because I was fucking ending things with her to fucking b-“ he takes a deep breath, “How would you feel if I told you I loved you?”

You feel your heart stop and your head snaps towards him, “What?”

He rolls his eyes, shaking his head slightly, “You heard me, y/n.”

You narrow your eyes slightly, taking a few seconds before speaking in a quiet, unsure tone, “I-I don’t..”

“Yes you do. Because the answer is why you keep staying. Putting yourself through wanting to hate me and.. wanting to love me.”

You chew the inside of your cheek, nails scratching over the fabric of your sweatpants clad thigh, really unsure of what to say.

“You said you wanted love. I only wanted sex.” Colby breaks the silence, “I didn’t really want anything serious, like we worked out as just friends that have sex occasionally.. or six times a day but, who’s counting?”

He chuckles and you shake your head with a slight smile.

“But then, you told me you developed feelings and yes, I kind of disregarded them, but I did it because I didn’t want to hurt you but-“

“You did.”

“And yet..” Colby stares at you and you look over at him, “I stayed.”

You and Colby hold your stare, tension growing faster and thicker as each second passes.

He reaches up, caressing your cheek, “She wanted a goodbye kiss, I figured, what the hell, the end of something old, going to start something new right?”

He shakes his head, eyes looking into yours, “You have showed up right when I leaned in because as soon as my lips were on hers, they were off. It felt like I was cheating, and for a few minutes I couldn’t figure out why..”

This thumb brushes over your skin, “Until I realized that the love of my life, has already been in my life for years and I’ve just been, too fucking stupid to realize it.”

You reach up, laying a hand on his, “It’s okay. We’re all a little stupid sometimes.”

“You’re so pretty..” He whispers quietly, “Pretty eyes..” his hand slides down to caress your jaw, his thumb sliding across your lips, “..pretty lips..”

You feel the heat growing between your legs.

You reach down, unbuckling your seatbelt, “I need your hands on me.” You lean up and he unbuckles his seatbelt, holding his hands out to welcome you into his lap.

Thankfully, you kept Colby in mind when you bought this car.

You straddle his lap, hands moving to press against his chest as you lean in, lips finding his.

His hands grip your hips, sliding down to grab onto your ass. You grind down against him, whimpering out as you feel his jeans press against your clothes cunt.

“Fuck.” Colby groans lowly, “I can never stop thinking about you.”

Your hands move up to run through his hair, moaning out as his lips suck a purple mark into your skin.

His hands slide around to the front of your sweats and pull them forward so he can slip a hand in.

You lift up, mouth going slack as you feel two of his fingers push past your soaked and needy folds. His fingers instantly curl, ripping a moan away from your lips.

Your hand moves to grip his neck and you lean in to press your lips to his, whimpering against them as his fingers slide out and move up to your clit.

Colby’s free hand presses into your lower back, pulling you into him, “A part of me wants to fuck you so hard because you ghosted me, but the other part of me wants to love on you.”

You kiss to his ear, moaning quietly as his fingers stay pressed to your clit, “Why not both?”

“I love the way you think.” He kisses down your neck as he leans forward, pushing you back as he does, “Don’t know why you didn’t wear something easier.”

He laughs slightly, glancing up at you as you feel your ass get exposed when he pulls your sweats down over it, “I mean, come on. Did you really think we weren’t going to fuck?”

“Shut up.” You whisper as you move around to get your sweats off. Colby’s hands slide up your bare thighs, gripping your hips tightly, “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” You ask innocently as you move to undo his pants. Colby watches hard as you quickly work to free his cock.

“Tellin’ he to shut up.” He drags hair from your face, tucking it behind your ear. He studies your face for a few seconds before his hand shifts back and takes a nasty grip on your hair, “I think you’re the one that needs to shut up..”

He pulls you in and kisses your lips, “Get back into your seat and lean over here.”

You quickly move over to the drivers seat and lean over the center console, only to wince when the previous grip on your hair returns.

Colby grabs the base of his cock and you immediately open your lips, welcoming the leaking tip onto your tongue.

He taps it a few times, the grip on your hair slowly subsiding as he lets you swirl and bob your head on your own terms, but that didn’t last long.

A harsh gag erupts from your throat as Colby pushes your head all the way down without warning, “Fuck, you’re so hot, baby.” He pants, bucking his hips, “S-shit.”

Your nails dig into his clothed thigh, eyes squeezing shut as you focus on trying to control your breathing, mainly because that’s the only thing you can do.

“fuck, do you want this cock to be yours and only yours, baby?”

He lifts your head and you come up with a gasp, eyes watery and lips puffy as you nod, whimpering out a weak, “Y-yes.”

“Mm.” Colby hums lowly, “Do you think you still need to learn a lesson for ghosting me then?”

You nod weakly and that’s all it took.

Colby pulls you back over into his lap and your elbows are rested on his shoulders as he lifts your hips up himself.

You bite your lip, eyes slowly closing the more his his cock inches into you.

“Fuck.” Colby groans out, holding you as still as he can, “Don’t move. Don’t move.”

“What?” You whimper out, “why?”

“I just want you to sit for a little bit baby, really take in the feeling of it, but I want you to beg for me while you do it.”

You groan and try to sit up but his arms tighten, “Better hope no cars decide to drive by, we’ve been lucky so far.”

It was this moment that you realized that you’re on a backroad and anyone can stumble upon you.

“Shit.” You breathe out, “Maybe we sh-“

Colby shifts and you moan out, “Fuck, Colby.”

“Feels good don’t it?” He asks in a cocky manner and you roll your eyes, “Yes.. I just..” you try to move your hips and Colby’s grip tightens, “I didn’t hear you beg for it yet, sweetheart.”

You sigh, “Colby. Please.”

“Please what, baby?” He brings his hand around to brush his fingers under your chin, his touch making the need to get off on him worse.

“I need you to fuck me!”

“Louder, baby.”

“Fuck me, Colby. Baby, please!”

He grinds your hips against him and your hands grip his shoulders as you scream out, “Fuck daddy, please, please I need you to fuck me!”

With the last word from your lips, Colby had your hips bouncing up and down on his cock within a second.

“Don’t ever leave me.” Colby groans lowly into your neck, “You’re not going anywhere.”

You moan in response, moving your hips with his pulls and pushes.

“Ya hear me?” He breathes out, gripping your chin to make your look at him, “Do you fucking hear me?”

“Yes. Colby. Yes.” You lay your hands on his cheeks, and with that, it’s like the mood changed. His grip on your body was, loving. No longer harsh.

His kisses were gentle and he held you close.

It’s like you broke him, you broke Colby Brock.

“I love you.” He whispers lowly and you turn your head, keeping your hips in a steady rhythm as your lips find his, “I love you.”

He kisses down your neck, biting down and sucking make into your skin, and right as you are about to cum, Colby taps your hip quickly, “Carcarcar.. car.”

You jump off, moving to the drivers seat start driving. You make your way down the road away from the said car, and the only thing you can do is laugh.

Colby reaches over after he fixes himself and lays his sweatshirt over your lap, “Here, babe.”

“Thank you.” You smile over at him and he takes his hand in yours, “Alright, sweetheart. Take me home so we can finish what we started.”

You pout, “Yeah, I was so close to a-“

“Don’t worry.” Colby smirks as he brings your knuckles to his lips, “I’ll make it up to you.”

——

Thank you so much for reading. I love you all. Thank you so much for being so patient with me while I work to get these out! 🖤

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

#samandcolby-ownme #Colby Brock #Colby Brock smut #dirty colby brock #colby brock one shot #Colby Brock fanfic #Colby Brock x reader #colby brock x y/n smut #colby brock x reader smut #colby brock x you #colby brock x y/n #colby brock dirty imagines #colby brock smut one shot #smut one shot

191 notes · View notes