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jarofstyles · 2 months

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Bad Idea, Right?

Obviously inspired by Miss Olivia Rodrigo’s song, here is a one shot I loved writing :) a bit of angst, a bit of a fluff, a lot of smut, a little bit of everything!

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WC- 6.2k

Warnings- toxic relationship, kinda asshole h, angst, crying, slight degradation, spitting, impact play (light), sex tape filming, daddy kink (light), use of Mama 🤭

—-

Y/N knew this was a very bad idea. She knew she was going to regret this in the morning, as she usually did when Harry texted her to show up somewhere, but here she was.

Her best black dress in the most soft fabric, the one he had complimented her on endlessly before peeling it off when they had still been together, was glued to her body, Hair curled and falling down her shoulders. If she was going to show up at a houseparty that her ex boyfriend was throwing, she may as well go all out and wear something that she knew he liked.

Internally, she tried to talk herself out of it as she approached the open door, ignoring the people making out on his lawn. The thump of the bass was audible outside, a deep sigh being let out as she tossed her phone in her clutch after texting him a simple ‘here.’ The shot she had taken before had done next to nothing to calm her nerves, her red lipstick meticulously touched up in the back of the uber as she squirmed in the seat surely getting fucked up as she bit down on her bottom lip, venturing into the home that used to be so familiar to her.

It had been 5 months since they’d broken up, but it had barely seemed like it. Harry had a way of getting into her head and driving her absolutely fucking mad. Their back and forth seemed neverending, their text threads updating every few days. A fight, a makeup, a request to see one another. As much as she wanted to claim it was all him, she knew she was equally as bad. It wasn’t like she hadn’t tried to find someone else- but no one else could get her off like him.

Harry knew her body better than anyone else, every curve and mark, where to touch and stroke. Where to stroke, where to lick, where to bite. He was an expert on how to get her off in just minutes, her cunt completely dedicated to him as much as she wished it wasn’t. Her brain and pussy had no communication in the information regarding the fact they were broken up, much to her dismay. The only thing saving her ego was that she knew that she had the same effect on Harry. There was no way she didn’t. Harry could very well fuck anyone he wanted to, more than capable to pull. Y/N had been overly jealous as a girlfriend and she knew that, but people were drawn to her boyfriend despite the fact it was well known he was taken. While he didn’t seem to take them up on it- he ate up the attention and preened over it, much to her irritation. It caused fights upon fights, her going out of her way to make him jealous- which worked. They both seemed to get off on pissing each other off.

Breaking up was supposed to stop the cycle, but it seemed to only string it out further.

There had been so many times she deleted his number but when he pulled up on her notifications again, she recognized the number and his attitude and couldn’t resist temptation. No one had ever made Y/N feel so many emotions in her life. Being around Harry was like a live wire, electric and hot, dangerous and potentially harmful, but the benefits sometimes outweighed the risks.

Her nose crinkled as she felt the floor stick under her shoe, knowing he would be pissed about that tomorrow. Whatever spiked punch was all over the floor and that would take some elbow grease to get out. Navigating through the entryway, she made her way into the living room. It was dark, flimsy lighting had been put up to make colorful strobes go around the room, the room far too filled for comfort. It was stupidly warm, regret crawling up her neck as she looked around to find anyone familiar.

“There she is!” The voice was unmistakable. Niall, arms tugging her in for a hug and pulling her into the kitchen where it was a bit quieter, the main group she was familiar with strung about along with a few strangers. “Harry’s girl is here, everyone! Y/N herself.” He chirped, making her give him a confused look until she followed his gaze to see Harry standing stiffly, a girl too close for comfort. Her eyes narrowed, taking in how the girl angled her body, hand resting on Harry’s arm, looking at her with a scowl.

It was an ugly feeling to see someone else around her man. Well- he wasn’t her man, but it was another miscommunication between her heart and brain. She hated seeing him around someone else, the mere idea of him being with someone that wasn’t her made her stomach turn. It wasn’t right. Yes, she knew it was a toxic cycle but it was one she didn’t know how to break. She knew this was bad, but she didn’t want anyone else having him the way she did.

The only saving grace was the fact that Harry looked uncomfortable, immediately peeling himself away from the other girl and coming straight over to Y/N.. Her face must have shown her irritation, mouth opening and arm resting on her hip as she went to give him a bit of hell but was cut off by his mouth.

And Y/N’s body, she was a fucking traitor. Feeling his arms wrap around her and push her against the counter, his tongue pressing into her mouth and tasting the cinnamon from the alcohol and sticky remnants of Coca Cola on his lips made her brain go numb. She always did love how strong he was, how safe she used to feel wrapped up in his arms. There were a few wolf whistles surrounding them, but Y/N had been taken aback from the heat of it so early on, hand slipping between her and the counter to grab at her ass. A surprised moan left her mouth before Niall let out a laugh.

“Alright, alright. Stop eating her, Harry.” Niall smacked his back, making Harry pull back with a hazy smirk. Almost dopy, making her blink up at him with her eyes narrowing again. His eyes were dark, lips wet now and that dark pink she liked so, so much. He hadn’t shaved today, leaving a bit of stubble around his face, a backwards hat combing his hair back to keep it out of his face. The nose piercing was swapped from a stud to a hoop, making her a bit surprised. Had he done that for her? He knew she liked it….

“You can take your hand off my ass now.” Her sassy tone didn’t match how her eyes looked, secretly loving that he had so publicly claimed her in front of a girl they both knew wanted him. It was a sick feeling, the victory even though she knew it was wrong to feel that way. It was a constant fight with herself. Knowing she should most definitely not be feeling so happy that her ex had just kissed her dumb in front of all his friends, but still liking that she had a claim on him.

“I could.” He retorted. “But it feels so nice in my palm, and we both know how much you like it.” A squeeze was given, Y/N scowling back up at him but not making any attempt to move. If she wanted to, he would get out of the way- but they both knew how this went. She pretended she didn’t liked his hands on her, he taunted her, they would glare and play fight before it got a little real, and they’d fuck. A circle they’d swung around plenty of times. His lips lowered to her ear, ignoring the chatter around them. “You’re wearing my dress, hm?”

“Yours? M’sorry, did you want to wear it?” She rose her eyebrow that she definitely hadn’t laid to perfection before she came here. “I forgot you even liked this one. It was the first thing I could reach in my closet.” Her nose was turned up, this time pushing past him to go over to the drinks. She looked down to see a cup with his name scribbled on it with a sharpie, lifting it up for confirmation before throwing it back.

Regretted immediately.

“Ugh- Harry, what the fuck?” She gagged, nose wrinkled as she opened his fridge to grab a bottle of water. “I forgot how disgusting your drinks are. God, how do you even have a stomach?” She gave him a horrified look, swishing the water in her mouth.’

“No one told you to fuckin’ take mine!” He grumbled, taking the cup to find it empty. “Fucks sake, Y/N. Taking my drink and then bitching about it. As usual.” He came up behind her to grab the bottle over the fridge, his ‘good stuff’ or whatever. It was already that time of night?

Where they started poking at each other to cause a fight. To have an excuse to wander off and to strip down to nothing.

“Excuse me?” Y/N grit her teeth, turning to look at him as he poured into his recently emptied cup. He was trying to get a rise out of her.

“You heard me, princess. Know those ears work, considering you’re an eavesdropper.”

Oh, he was going low. She crinkled the water bottle in her hands, shoulders tending as she exhaled sharply through her nose. “Well I wouldn’t have had to if you didn’t get so fucking weird with your phone. You were the one hiding a ‘project partner’ from me.” Her fingers did air quotes around that, showing that she didn’t believe his excuse.

“Oh, for fucks sake.” Harry hissed, his own jaw setting. “I told you that she was just a partner for my paper. I didn’t tell you at first because I know you’d overreact and go all insane on me for daring to interact with another woman.” He snarled back, knowing where to hit where it hurt.

“I wouldn’t have had to be paranoid if you’d respected me to stop flirting and entertaining girls who disrespected our relationship by hitting on you in front of me! You literally encouraged it!” She was trying to keep her voice down, but it was hard. This was an especially sore spot.

“So replying with a thank you is encouraging it? Sue me for liking that someone complimented me on something!” He raised an arm up, running fingers through his hair in frustration before he turned away to lean on the counter with his arms crossed, cup in hand. “God, you do this every fucking time. We aren’t fucking together anymore, that’s your fault. Why do you continue to harrass me about this? Even if I did encourage it, I never went for it did I?” A cruel smirk emerged. “Though I’m a free agent now, yeah? Could go take Josslyn or Heather up on their offers?

Harry knew he had taken it a bit too far when her breathing caught for real, watching as he froze and her bottom lip trembled. That wasn’t a part of their regular script to wind each other up before hot sex. It was a bit of the real hurt that has blossomed through, but he hadn’t meant to let it out. Her eyes turned glassy, her hand snatching his drink and throwing it at his shirt.

“Fuck you.”

Harry felt the cold liquid hit him, hissing as he stood in slight shock as he watched her turn to leave. He had really fucked up. His stomach dropped as he tried to gather his bearings, cursing under his breath before going after her.

“Y/N! Fuck, don’t go.” He yelled after her, making his way through the throngs of people in his living room, eyes watching her back go towards the door. While he had definitely said fucked up things before, this had been designed to hit where it really hurt.

Y/N stomped through the living room, ignoring his calls for her as she got closer to the door- closer to escape- when she was caught. Arms wrapping around her waist as he pulled her into the bathroom next to the stairs and turning so he was against the door. Y/N kept her back towards him but yanked herself free from his grip, irritated that she was crying. That it still hurts. He knew it would and that’s partially what made it worse. He had been out to hurt her and she had known it was a bad idea to show up tonight but somewhere in her heart she had this tiny, tiny hidden hope that maybe tonight would be a night they could finally get over their differences. She missed him so much it ached if she allowed herself to feel it, but she had tried to refuse her feelings.

It had boiled over now, though.

Harry swallowed thickly as he heard the sniffle. Y/N wasn’t one to cry about a lot. She hadn’t shed a lot of tears in the time they’d been together, emotionally iron clad as it seemed. When she did? It was unnerving. Heartbreaking. It was one of his least favorite things ever, seeing her crumble. While he may have enjoyed getting her angry and irritated, maybe a little jealous, he never liked hurting her. He gained no pleasure from that.

“Baby…” He spoke softly, trying to turn her around, hands pulling at her shoulders. He was bigger than her and could definitely turn her around if he wanted to, but he wouldn’t ever touch her in a way she didn’t want.

“No. You can’t- you can’t call me that anymore. I am not your baby.” She hissed, keeping herself turned from him. Harry winced. She hadn’t said that before, not seriously, but the venom in her voice had shown how upset she was. It was laced with the hoarse blanket that coated her voice when she cried, making it even worse. “You can go call Josslyn or Heather. I’m sure they’d love to be your b-baby.” The end of the sentence was joined with a little sob, effectively breaking his heart further.

“No. No, I’m not… I didn’t mean it, Y/N. I promise. I was just upset and I didn’t mean for it to come out, I just wanted you to feel-”

“What?” Whipping around, Y/N’s mascara streaked cheeks were a blow to the chest. Her vulnerability was something he used to crave, to be the one she confided in or let herself break with. He wanted to be there for her. Not be the cause of her tears. “You wanted me to feel hurt, like you did? Do you not think I don’t hurt every fucking day?”

“You broke up with me!” Harry tried, her glare making him stop talking quickly after.

“I broke up with you because you didn’t take me seriously. How could you go from telling me you can’t wait to put a ring on my finger, can’t wait to have a family with me, to flirting with girls the same night? Do you know how humiliating it is to have your friends tell you that they heard so and so say they were going to try something because it ‘obviously isn’t serious with Y/N?” The incredulous look on her face made him shrink back a bit.

“I didn’t know that! It was never real flirting, Y/N. I liked to get my ego stroked, the attention felt nice, but I would never, ever step out on you. I love you, for fucks sake!” He went to reach for her but she backed up, flinching slightly. Another dagger to the chest. He had really, really fucked up. She never denied his touch.

“You love me?” A humorless laugh escaped her swollen lips. “Is that how you love people, Harry? Make them feel disposable and humiliated because you can’t be happy with one girl telling you that she loves you back? My compliments weren’t enough?” Arms crossed defensively over her chest. “Give me a fucking break. Telling me that as if you didn’t just say moments ago that you should take up girls who actively disrespected our relationship on their offers to fuck you while you were dating me? Yeah, that’s definitely something someone who loved me would do.” She wanted to stay angry but she was hurt. Hurt so bad, the full weight of their breakup actually hitting her as she felt the sob crawl up her throat and hurried to cover her eyes as she began to cry. It couldn’t be held back. She was at her breaking point.

Harry wanted to throw up. He hadn’t thought of it that way, and honestly? He had never expected this. Sometimes Y/N had acted as if she didn’t have a lot of emotion, reserved and a bit quiet when she expressed herself. The one time he had gotten her to let go was during sex, where he truly felt her desire. That was maybe why he liked the attention from other people. She wasn’t very forthcoming with praise or overly lovey with him, and it had hurt a little. But he could deal with that later, because his poor fucking girl was sobbing in front of him.

“No, no… sweet girl. Please.” He watched as she dropped down to sit on the floor, gathering her knees to her chest as he followed after her. “Hey- M’so sorry. I didn’t think about it like that. I really didn’t. I was just talking out of my ass because I was hurt we’re still broken up a-and I shouldn’t have said anything but….” He sat down fully next to her, pulling her body on to his lap. She tried to squirm at first but he could tell it was half hearted as she settled down a moment later, the sobs wracking her body as his arms wrapped around her and his lips went to her ear.

“M’so sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t ever want to make you feel that way. You’ve always been so important to me and this is breaking my heart.” He whispered. “Hate that you’re crying because of me. I hate that I ever made you doubt that you were important to me, or that I respect you. I do. I promise you, I do.” He whimpered slightly, desperate to get her to believe him. “I’m an ass, I know. But you have to know I do, I love you so much. I’m so fucking sorry for throwing that in your face.”

In the grand scheme of things, he knew that some people would think she was overreacting- but he understood now. He hadn’t truly meant to take it that far, hadn’t even stopped to think that those exact women had been sources of insecurity. They were the first to pop into his head because he had rejected them again tonight, waiting for Y/N to arrive.

He never wanted to be broken up with. He had planned on being with her forever, and he had fucked it up.

Her cries started to fade, sniffles taking the place of sobs as he whispered soft words, consoling her. He knew he’d fucked up tonight, in their relationship. He hadn’t communicated the way he needed to and he played games, but he thought that it would get a different reaction. His intentions weren’t to hurt her. Selfishly, stupidly, he assumed it hadn’t phased her. That she was just angry and not upset.

If she’d give him another chance he’d fix it. He’d make sure to open her up a little more, make her feel more safe. Reign in his flirting, make sure he was just polite instead. He’d never put their relationship in jeopardy again. “C’mon. Come with me, to my room.” Standing up, he pulled her along with her. It said a lot about her right now that she wasn’t fighting, letting him lead her to his room with her hand tucked in his own. Her face was downcast, making sure no one could see that she’d cried as Harry took the key from his pocket and undid the lock. He really didn’t want strangers in his room.

It was still the same. His navy bedspread and Nirvana posters on the side of his wall, his desk slightly messy with a leftover fast food cup sitting next to his water bottle on his night stand. He’s gotten it for her, because she got thirsty in the middle of the night.

What really got her attention was the framed photo of them that was right next to it. Her soft smile and his wide one, teeth out as he held her in his lap. His flannel was around her and his hat was backwards as he snuggled her. It had been cool that night but there was a bonfire, not enough seats and a handsy Harry ready to make his lap her throne. Her throat tightened as she looked at the photo, dropping his hand and wrapping her arms around her body to self soothe before she walked up to it.

“Why do you still have this up?” Her voice was shaky still, looking down at the happy memory.

“Because I still love you. I told you.” Hands were placed on her hips as she was brought into him, hugging her from behind as he unwrapped her arms and threaded their fingers together. “I know I’ve been shit. I’ve been… impatient, an attention whore, all of the insults you’ve said. But I love you. I have since day one. I’d have never cheated on you, regardless of what you may believe.” The idea of it made him feel ill.

“Then why?” Her wavering voice made him frown. “Why did you keep flirting with people in my face? I know you said it was cause I wasn’t giving you enough compliments but I didn’t know you thought that.” His heart nearly snapped in two when her voice broke. “I thought the world of you. I was so proud to be with you and then… I thought you just didn’t like me anymore. I know…” A deep inhale was felt as her tummy lifted both of their arms. “I know I can be a little cold or quiet, but I had no idea you felt neglected. I pulled back because you kept talking to other girls how you used to talk to me and… I didn’t feel like it was okay to.”

It made him feel worse. Hearing this now. Y/N had broken up with him and he’d been hurt, his pride making him sneer at her and the nastiness was even more uncalled for now that he knew. Y/N wasn’t a bitch, she wasn’t unfeeling- she didn’t feel safe. He’d done that to her because he was the little bitch here, not giving her the safety she needed in order to open up. While they should’ve been continuing growing, he got his feelings hurt and made it impossible for her to feel like she could give those things to him.

“I’m sorry.” His voice was weak. “I’m sorry. I’ll keep saying it. I didn’t mean it. I promise, nothing I've said is true. I wanted to wind you up, I wanted to fuck you because it was the only way you’d get close to me again. I never intended on making you feel unsafe with me, fuck. That’s the last thing I ever wanted. Makes me feel sick to hear that.” He nuzzled against her neck, placing a kiss there before pulling away, unwrapping them and sitting on the edge of his bed. Y/N wasn’t fighting him, so he gently tugged her to sit on his lap, this time facing him. “There she is.” A sad smile lifted his lips, thumb wiping away the streaks of mascara that had flaked off with her tears. “Still so pretty when you cry, even if it breaks m’heart.”

It was worse than a kicked puppy. Y/N wasn’t a huge emoter so knowing that he’d done this had made him wonder what she did alone. How many other times he’d made her cry but she wasn’t solid enough around him to do it in front of him.

“You broke mine.” She whispered, looking down at his shirt. “I don’t mean to be a bitch. I was just scared.”

“Oh, sweetheart.” He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Let me fix it. Please?” Holding her face in his hands, he got her eyes back on his. “Let me make it better. I won’t do any of that ever again, I’ll communicate better… Just let me make your heart feel safe again.”

Y/N knew she was a sucker for this. She shouldn’t say yes. Every part of her except her brain was screaming to stay, though. While her head was telling her to run away as fast as she could, her heart thudded in her chest and her body wanted closer to his own. It was a decision she may come to regret, maybe she’d hate herself for it, but she couldn’t let go. “O-Okay.” She whispered, feeling his head fall against hers. “Please don’t break my heart again, H. I can’t do that again.”

“I’d rather die.”

His lips were pressed against hers, and moved quickly from there.

One of the things that never lacked with them as a couple was sexual chemsitry. It’s what had them so obsessed with each other at first. The best way to get Y/N to express herself was when she was full of cock or close to the edge of orgasm, which was why Harry had no problem saying his apologies between her legs.

“M’sorry, baby.” He crooned, licking over her drippy slit. “So, so sorry. M’gonna take care of you.” Lips pressed kisses to her clit, a keening whine leaving her lips as fingers clutched his hair and brought him closer to her. His mouth had always been his greatest gift and biggest curse. Somehow he knew all the right things to say, all the right things to do to pleasure her but always stuck his goddamn foot in his mouth. He was going to change that now.

Dark green gazed into hers as he took another broad lick, the tip of his nose brushing over her clit. Large hands with chipped polish wrapped around her thighs and kept them spread, his hair a mess from her hands carding through it with their hot makeout and now his time spent working on her pussy. This was undoubtable a perk of being with the man, knowing how much he genuinely loved to eat pussy. He’d spend hours licking and sucking on her, making her sensitive and cum over and over again whenever he had the chance. For his birthday he’d genuinely wanted a day inside with her where he spent the majority of his morning eating her for breakfast, her thighs his perfect earmuffs from the snow that happened to fall on the day.

Whenever they spent time apart he missed this desperately. He’d not even tried to find someone to replace this because he knew the feeling wouldn’t ever be the same. Sure, he’d loved eating pussy before Y/N but it had turned into a full on obsession with her. No one had ever tasted as good, made as many cute noises, squealed when his mouth latched on her clit and his finger curled just right- like he was doing now, holding her bucking hips down.

“Oh, I know, Mama, I know.” He cooed against her. “Feels so fucking good, doesn’t it? Needed my mouth on this greedy fucking pussy…” Pursing his lips, he spit over her slit and watched it drip with a hiss before usng his tongue to spread it, digits dripping down to his wrist before his tongue trilled over the swollen bud. It didn’t take much to push her over, but a well timed smack against her thigh to get her to stop squirming had done the job. A wet gasp tore from her mouth as she squeale his name, simultaneously pulling his mouth against her and trying to push him away. Using his strength against her, he made sure to lick up a bit before spitting again, leaving her pussy wet and messy as he climbed up her body and kissed her hard.

His chin was wet and she knew he was a fucking mess but her tongue delved into his mouth, tasting herself on him. She could hear the tug down of his zipper, felt him moving and wiggling his pants down but she was too busy sucking on his tongue and reveling in his moans against her to think twice before she felt the tip of his cock smack against her cunt.

“I’m clean, baby. No one but you, never need anyone but you.” His grip on her chin was tight as he rutted himself against her cunt. “Even when you were being a miserable bitch t’me, all I wanted to do was love on you. M’gonna make sure you never fucking doubt how much you own me again. This is the only cunt I need.”

There was sick satisfaction that rolled through him as he slid into her and felt the stretch, watching her mouth fall open as she was filled. It only confirmed what he had hoped- she hadn’t been fucking around much, if at all. Granted, he was thick and long and it would be hard to beat him, but he knew what she felt like when she was well fucked. “Oh, look at that…” He whispered, angling her head down to look at where her pussy lips clung to his cock as he pulled out a bit. “She missed me, didn’t she, baby? Sweet pussy missed my cock so fucking much, doesn’t want me to pull away.”

Harry was by far the filthiest man she’d ever experienced but that’s part of the appeal. He may be a bit of an asshole, but god, he knew how to fuck. How to kiss. How to make her feel special when he wasn’t being a dickhead. Moments like this always wiped that shit clean, the slate cleared and her head foggy as all she could focus on was how right he was. “Yeah- yeah, don’t take it from me again.” She growled, digging her nails into his skin. “Don’t fucking take my cock from me again, don’t make me walk away. This is mine.”

Harry hissed, loving the sting on his skin and how she spoke. Y/N could be a fierce little bitch and he loved that about her. She hadn’t been pleased tonight and he’d taken it too far, but she was going to have no doubt how much he had been missing her. Their hate sex had been good, but their makeup sex was even better. “Never, Mama. Never, it’s all yours. You’re right.” His voice soothed, pushing back into her and reveling in how hot she was. Tight. Everything he could possibly need. “It’s yours always, and I don’t want anyone else. Jus’ want you to let me love on you, make you feel good. Be my girl again. He had everything else he wanted, but Y/N was the missing link. He’d fucked up with her, but he wouldn’t do it again. Not when this was how explosive it was between them.

“You better fucking treat me right.” Her hand held his face now. “Better be so nice to me, buy me f-flowers and hold my hand… Fuck me good, make sure all the other b-bitches know that you’re taken.” Her legs wound around him and he felt a heel surely to bruise his ass, but he didn’t care. “Don’t let them think you’re available because you’re an attention whore.”

Harry moaned at the degrading words, because they were true. He was indeed an attention whore and he’d never deny it. “Only for you, baby. Want all your fucking attention… fuck.” He hissed, thrusting slower as he looked at where they joined. “Creaming on my cock already, really must have missed me.” Noses brushed before he fucked harder into her, trying to bring her to the edge. “Fingers didn’t cut it, did they? No toy can make you feel as good as his. Know that you needed Daddy t’fuck you right.”

Y/N let out a wail as he tugged her hips up, his face leaving hers to sit on his knees while he fucked her. He was getting the spot she needed, saying the words she wanted and she felt hot all over. Syrupy, sticky hot as she dripped down her ass as the sound of their sex filled his room. The music muffled behind the door didn’t matter, all she wanted to hear was his dirty talk and the sound of their skin. “Yes, I needed it Daddy- Fuck me, fuck me right. You always make me cum over and over…” her head rolled back on the mattress as her fingers found his wrists, grounding herself as he fucked her steady and hard.

His eyes took in the view of bouncing tits and a messy cock pistoning in and out of her creamy cunt, breathing heavy while he felt her tighten up on him. His goal was always to make sure she came over and over, a generous lover being one of his positive attributes. “Mhm… It’s never changed, Mama. M’gonna give it to you just like that. God, you look so fucking pretty on my dick, baby. Need to capture it.” He adjusted slightly as he took his phone out, thankful his pants had only been down a few inches as he pressed record. A breathy laugh left him as he fucked into her willing body, aiming the camera down at her face. “Say hi to the camera, pretty girl.” He crooned.

“H-Hi Daddy.” She mewled, preening under the attention. It was a guilty pleasure of hers, knowing he had the filthy images and videos on his phone. It was even better to watch it back and see just how wrecked she got from him. “You’re gonna be nice to me so you- so you don’t have to delete these, right?” He’d had to delete all the videos when they broke up, but she hoped this time they’d get to stick around forever.

“Of course, my sweet girl. Never gonna fuck this up again… Not when we look so fucking good together. Feel so fucking good together…. Fuck, look at that…” He got a close up of her cunt as it stretched to fit him, clinging to his length. “You’re gonna cum, I can feel it.” His eyes met hers as he started to get her to the edge, her face glistening and eyes hazy. “Go on, baby. Do it. Cum on my cock, make a fucking mess.”

Harry could feel it as she did, the high pitched whine of his name and the bite of her nails as she writhed on his cock, the camera capturing her face as she did so. Mouth open and eyes rolled back, the blissed out smile following as he fucked her through it. He didn’t stop, tossing the phone to the side as he kissed her again as his cock pulsed, trying to hold back his own orgasm. “Mmm… fuck. I love when you cum on me. So gorgeous, all mine.” He rubbed their noses together again while humping into her, her impossibly hot cunt clinging to him as he peppered kisses to her face. “But I’m not done with you yet.”

“No?” She grinned, feeling drunk. “Should have known, you sex maniac- fuck.” She pushed his hand away from her cunt. “Give a girl a minute, fucks sake.”

“Just got you back, can you blame me?” He smiled against her mouth, sucking her lower lip into his mouth and grazing it with his teeth. He wanted her to look freshly fucked and glowing tomorrow when she had to meet up with her friends for brunch, sure to piss them off with the news that they’re back together. “Mean it, I’m not letting you go this time. Never again.” His smirk got bigger. “Pussy’s too fucking good.”

“Shut up, slut.” She pushed his face away playfully. You’ve got more than one orgasm to go until I think about taking you back. Prove your worth to me.” His cock could be felt twitching inside her yet again.

“Whatever you say, Mama.” He cooed, pulling out of her regretfully. “Now, get on your knees. I’ve got to say sorry to your pretty ass.”

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eli0004 · 2 months

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I absolutely love your Levi fics you write him so good ❤️ I was hoping to request one, how do you think a jealous Levi would be like? How would he act and be comforted? Would he be possessive? Insecure?

I’d be happy to answer this! Also i love your pfp🫶🥹

Summary: How Levi Ackerman behaves when he’s jealous.

Warnings: jealousy/insecurity

It would be easy to say Levi just…doesn’t get jealous. The typical “he’s too mature for that” or something, but the truth is, jealousy is an emotion, and we all experience emotions. Whether or not we know how to recognize them as what they are- that’s a different story.

As i’ve stated before, Levi is a deeply emotional character, and he can be pretty insecure in some ways. I think if he saw you conversing happily with someone who was the complete opposite of him, it might nag at him a little more than one might think.

You could be standing to the side, talking with an acquaintance and suddenly he’s thinking “when’s the last time i made them laugh like that?”

Or if he notices you looking up at them, he wonders if you might wish he were taller sometimes.

But this is not caused by anything you’re doing. Levi trusts you with his heart and soul. But he’s an over-thinker, always worried that one day you’ll wake up and realize there are other options. He doesn’t understand why you’d want him, he doesn’t feel like he has much left of himself to give you, and in his eyes, you deserve the best life has to offer.

He won’t confront you about it, but you’ll know. When Levi is sad, he seems very off in his own world, like he’s in deep thought. It’s easy to tell, because he isn’t paying attention as diligently to what you’re saying. This is very outside the norm, he’s usually very attentive.

If you attempt to communicate with him about it, he won’t know exactly how to explain what he’s feeling, and he might come off as dismissive or avoidant.

Contrary to popular beliefs however, I don’t think he’d become distant. Levi has had his worth placed in what he can do for people his whole life, so he’ll likely linger around and try to make himself as useful to you as possible.

It all comes down to the moment you realize that he’s (even subconsciously) trying to prove his worth to you. You’ll find him checking/cleaning your gear, tidying your room, or on his hands and knees scrubbing your floors.

You’ll beckon him to come close, hug him tightly and kiss his cheek, and you’ll ask him “You know I love you, right? Even when you’re not doing all this?”

You’ll see it in his eyes first, and then you’ll hear it in his voice when he sighs softly and relaxes against you. “Promise?”

“Promise.”

#attack on titan #aot #aot x reader #aot smut #aot headcanons #aot x y/n #levi ackerman #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman smut #levi ackerman headcanons #levi headcanons #snk levi #levi x reader #levi aot #levi attack on titan #sub levi #sub levi ackerman #subby levi #captain levi

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genshin-squabbles-and-wobbles · 1 year

Text

Hurtful to You Mid-Argument || Part 2

Request: greetings. may i requst the GEnshin bois saying something hurtful to you mid argument, gotta adds some angsttt, thank you :) Cyno, scaramouche, tighnari, and ayato Note: OH MY GOD THIS POST BLEW UP OVERNIGHT. Thank you guys for the wonderful support, it is much appreciated that I can receive so much love for my writing. Thank you so much. I feel so connected and loved by this community, please, let's all simp and cry together. Requested Tags: @aquamarine001 and @arrowximpack Content: You got into an argument with your lover until they said something hurtful to you, thus leading you to leave mid argument. This is a continuation, which will have a mix of fluff and angst, because everyone's heart needs a break. Part 1: Here

Cyno: ╔══ ❀•°❀°•❀ ══╗╚══ ❀•°❀°•❀ ══╝╔══ ❀•°❀°•❀ ══╗

You cried for a copious amount of time, so much that your eyes were swollen and red. Currently, you are staring up at the ceiling with a numbed mind. Sometimes you go back to crying and sometimes you just...stare. Everything seems so slow right now. Your pillow was wet from the splatters of tears.

However, the most notable thing was a broke hourglass on the ground. This was a gift from Cyno from one of his journeys. However, in a fit a rage, you slapped it off your nightstand, wanting this gift to get out of your sight as soon as possible.

You feel miserable. Now, for Cyno, you thought he left and just went off on his own, but in fact that was untrue. Cyno was still outside of your door, it was just you never saw him fully left. Cyno had his head and both hands pressed against your door, he stood there the whole time listening to you cry. He regretted his words greatly. He kept thinking to himself if he was just taking his anger out on you, or if your friend was truly a suspect on his list. However, none of that matters. Cyno felt he was on thin ice with you, and that you were going to break up with him. He pulled out the intelligent drug out of his possession and is tempted to drink it so just drown his sorrows. However, that was too reckless, even for him. He sighed and put the drug away. He decided, maybe we would try and apologize, what is there the more to lose at this point? He gently re-entered your home, and took a deep breathe, and slowly entered your room. "Hey.." he gently called out to you.

You jumped at his gentle voice, almost giving in to it. You turned your head to him, and gave him a side glared at him. Your back was faced to him mostly but you turned around slowly. "What do you want? Here to accuse me of murder?" "Don't say that, darling." He looked to the side and looked back at you. "Listen sweety, I am very sorry for what I said, I shouldn't have alluded that type of serious accusation towards you. I should be the first person to know you best out of anyon-" He felt a soft smack on his face.

You threw your pillow at him. "I don't care! Get out! I hate you! I always support you and you leave me for days and weeks and then come back to insult me to my face!" You began to throw another pillow at him. Cyno dodges it and walks up closer to you. "I-I'm sorry, I know what I said was seriou-"

You got up and pushed him. "Just leave! I don't ever want to see you again!" Suddenly, you were pinned down against the bed, confused you looked and saw Cyno on top of you. His torso was in between your legs, along with his hair falling down and tickling your skin.

He brings his face closer to yours and looked you into your eyes. "Do you really mean that?" He asked with a serious expression. Cyno kept a serious face but deep down, he was trying to keep back the tears welling up in his eyes. He was better at hiding it then it seems though.

You sniff and looked to the side. Cyno gently placed his forehead against yours, and started to whisper to you. "Do you truly mean that? If you want me to go, I will go and never come back, if you so wish desire."

Immediately, you gave him a look of distress, as the sound of that was so horrible and bitter to you. That look you gave him is all the answer he needs. "I see, so you don't mean it." He whispered. "Listen, I didn't mean what I said, okay? It was wrong of me to say something so morbid to you, especially how far I go to deal with these things." You looked away. He lets go of your hand and turned your face to him. "Look at me. I mean it when I say this. I was just stressed because I just haven't found any clues of this case. After I finish this case, I promised to take a break and spend time with you. I'll even meet this friend of yours. Okay?" He said gently, and attempted to kiss your irritated red eyes, which you let him. You nodded, despite you not vocalizing forgiveness, you calmed down enough to respond to him more calmly. He lets go of your hands and wrapped his arms around you, while you are still pinned down in bed. "Come, let me take care of you today...and fix this hourglass." Scaramouche: ╔═ ❀•°❀°•❀ ═╗╚═ ❀•°❀°•❀ ═╝╔═ ❀•°❀°•❀ ═╗ You were going out for a walk, this was in the afternoon where the sky was orange and pink. You were still crying, walking and stumbling. You looked up and saw a clift, a nice spot to take a breather. You went to the clift and prompted to sit down until you felt a tight grab on your arm from behind you.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?" A distressed Scaramouche yelled while yanking your arm along with you, away from the clift. "Are you seriously going to jump off a cliff because of all that??" "W-What? N-NO! I just wanted to sit and calm dow-" Whatever you said didn't matter anyways. He pulled you into a hug and hugged you very tightly. You felt him out of breath and felt his hand gently on the back of your head. You placed your hands on his chest and tried to push him away as hard as you can, but he refuse to budge.

"Scaramouche, get off of me." He refused and he showed that by pushing you against a nearby tree. Your back was to a thick tree, and now you can feel his body against you a bit more. He grabbed your hands and kissed you passionately, breathing heavily, using his body to keep you pushed against the tree. "S-Scara?" You pulled away from his sudden kiss, confused. Surprisingly, you saw a sad and regretful expression on his face. "I'm sorry, okay?" He said going back to hugging you, pressing his body against yours. Feeling your warmth. "I didn't.....I didn't meant be rude to you." He gently pulled away and had his hands, cupping your cheeks, as he is looking straight down at you with a gentle, yet troubled expression. You felt his breathe on your cheek. "I missed you...so much. The reason why I was gone was because I got lost somewhere, and I was too embarrassed to admit. I want you to see me as a strong man, a reliable man, someone who won't slip up over stupid things like this. I got lost, and I missed you, so much. All I could think of was hugging you. I don't want you to have to worry about me." He sighed. You blushed gently. "Where did you learn to communicate your feelings like this to me? You usually want me to figure it out by myself." Scaramouche sighed with embarrassment, he had a small pink hue on his cheeks. "I...I met a couple, they were very...touchy with each other, so I ended up asking them questions and how relationships are supposed to be like. Just know that I missed you, seeing that couple made me think of things I want to do with you. So....please don't leave me like that, okay?"

Tighnari:╔══════╗╚══════╝╔══════╗╔══════╗╚════╝

You were walking, zipping up your coat down Sumeru forest. You walked along the river, calming down to the night time noises homed to the peaceful forest. You continued, to walk and sat in between a large bark roots of a tree. It was a little spot to watch the water and poke at the flowers nearby. At this point, if monsters come and attack you, you'd let them. You don't care anymore. Why bother? So much for love. You sighed. Slowly a shadow emerged emitted from the moon light. You noticed the shadow at two large ears that are twitching. It was Tighnari, he slowly walked and looked down on you. In his hand was the bag you knitted him. "I finally found you." He said quietly. "If you didn't...uhm..if you didn't make that delicious dinner for me, I wouldn't have found you since you smelled like dinner.." You didn't respond. Tighnari understands your silence. He slowly walked behind you and sat down, and wrapped his arms around you, and gently pulled you in between his legs. "Tigh-"

"You can be mad at me all you like, I won't let you go, but I will say this. I truly do apologize for treating you like that. It was wrong of me to take my anger out on you like that. I should have known better that you only do things to make me happy." "..." "you can be mad at me all you like, but I am not moving, and I won't be letting you go until you come home with me. " He pulled you more closer to him, as you feel his chest on your back and his breath by your neck. You feel his tail wrapped around you, keeping you warm from the night cold. You feel his legs guarding yours. He was putting you in a box practically. He began to rub your stomach a bit. "You were waiting for me to eat, weren't you?" You sigh.

"I thought so." Tighnari pulled out a few slices of veggie pizza in a toppleware from the knitted bag you made him and placed it on your lap. "Eat." "....And this bag you made me...is very useful, thank you. I will take it with me on my future adventures." He whispered to you as you feel his ears resting on top of your head. Sooner or later, you ate, and ending up falling asleep on him. He picked you up and carried you home, as he placed you in bed and tucked you in. He climbed in bed with you and cuddled you from behind. He buried his nose into your neck, trying to fall asleep to your scent. Ayato: ┌── •✧• ──┐└── •✧• ──┘┌── •✧• ──┐

Ayato was knocking at your door. Despite his work being due at the end of tomorrow, he abandoned it momentarily to make sure things are good with you. However, no matter how much he knocked, no response. It has been days ever since, however today, he was worried and he decided to be bold and let himself in. "Darling, please. Let's talk." He spoke softly, as he walked in. However once he walked in, he saw you packing your clothes, getting ready to leave. Panic ran up his spine and he immediately rushed up to you. "Hey, Hey, hey, what's going on here, beloved?" You ignored him and continued to pack your clothes. He grabbed both of yours hands to stop you. Your hands fits perfectly in his palms. "Darling, please let's talk about this." He had a devastated expression on his face. "No, I'm done." You said and yanked your hands out of his. You closed your luggage and got up. "Huh?! Darling?" He became worried as his voice raised in panic. "I'm breaking up with you and I am leaving you. I don't see this working out. Don't come and find me, and I never want to see you again." You rushed out, racing towards the exit. Ayato yelling for your name behind you. Ayato was walking behind you, yelling your name, as you ignored him and continued. He was catching up to you quickly due to his long legs and tall stature. Ayato then finally caught up to you, and luckily with this office nearby, he yanked you in along with your luggage. "HUH?" You were confused on why it was suddenly dim and you luggage had fallen. Ayato was hugging your from behind, tightly. You feel his whole body on your back. "P-Please...don't do this to me....I don't want to lose you." "Let go of me." You said sternly attempting to pick up your luggage. Ayato kicked your luggage far from you, and hugged you tighter. Ayato's head was looking down at your shoulder, as you felt something plop on your shoulders and neck. Ayato was crying, and silently begging you to not leave him. Like a broken down child. "Please...you are all I have left." Ayato buried his head into your shoulder and slowly fell to his knees, bringing you down with him onto your knees as well. You sighed. "Ayato..." "Don't say my name, say what you have always called me." Ayato begged quietly. You sighed and complied. ".....My darling."

Hearing this calmed him down a little bit as he rested his head on your back. He was still very tightly knitted to you, but he started to calm down. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ignore you for so long. The type of work they are giving me here is quite rigorous. These documents are from an important events, so I can't ignore them." He said slowly letting go of you. You turned around to see a very stressed and distressed Ayato, with tears in his eyes and tears streaming down his face. You adjusted yourself, however, that small adjustment made Ayato grab your hands and yanked you onto his lap, as he buried his face in your neck. "I won't let you leave me!" He said thinking you were attempting to leave him again. "I-I was just adjust myself, not leaving." "Y-You're not leaving anymore?" He looked at you with devastating eyes. "No, darling. I'm...I'm sorry for trying to break up with you, I was so upset that you wouldn't give me the time of day and then when you do, you yell at me, I was just frustrated." Ayato hugged you on his lap, and had his hand on the back of your head, as if he almost dropped a glass diamond. He kept you on his lap, resting there for an hour until he fully calmed down and regain his posture. He sighed and spoke. "I'm sorry you had to see me like that, as you can see, you mean quite a lot to me, however, I do see the mistake on my part and how that can push you away from me. I have a compromise, why don't you come into my office and...rest yourself on my lap, I'll hold you as I work. Maybe you can stay long enough to fall asleep on me...." He murmured still affected by the events, but will recover eventually.

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runawaymarbles · 2 years

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Hii!

I don’t understand what’s going on with AO3 and the election? I’ve been using it for about a year so this is all new to me! Is Tiffany getting elected actually bad?

I hate censorship, so seeing posts about them censoring stuff is concerning but idk how much truth to it there is 😳

I just want to be informed, and understand!

Hi! Welcome to AO3:)

since I'm not sure how much you know already, the background (background as interpreted by me: I am not speaking on behalf of the OTW) is: Ao3 is run by the Organization for Transformative Works (OTW), the nonprofit that also runs Fanlore and publishes Transformative Works & Cultures. Anyone who has donated $10 to the OTW in the last year, and chooses "yes I want to be a member" at checkout is an OTW member. (This is not the same as having an ao3 account.) Every year, there is an election to fill either 2 or 3 seats on the Board of Directors. OTW Members (i.e. people who donated between 7/1/21 and 6/30/22, in this case) get to vote on this.

Most of the time, this election is only really followed by people on fail_fandomanon. Sometimes, it isn't.

Things the Board of Directors does: writes posts to send out to the general public when Things Are Happening (the recent csam attacks, the requests for more antiracism measures.) Writes posts to send to volunteers when Things Are Happening (see prev.) Keeps track of what all the committees are doing and how it ties in with whatever the strategic plan says they should be doing. Deals with the IRS/US laws. Approves large funding requests. Deals with emails that someone else has deemed outside their own wheelhouse. Herds cats. Proposes priorities. Points at something shiny, pats the org on the flank, and says "walk that way, walk that way!! Come on buddy, you can do it!!". etc etc etc.

Things the Board of Directors doesn't do: unilaterally determine ao3 content policy. Let us use the word "porn" on ao3 drive merch. Make decisions that are going greatly affect other volunteers' work without input and some level of agreement from said volunteers.

Anyway. This year, one of the five candidates for the three open board seats is Tiffany G. (More information about all the candidates and their platforms is at https://elections.transformativeworks.org)

Tiffany is a tag wrangler from an unspecified country that is, from context, assumed to be China. The candidate Q&A can be read here. Her answers were a little bit confusing, but she said she wanted to update the ToS policies on 'pedophilic and illegal content' because, quote, "people think we host child porn content and such things... It might... be helpful to clarify that to the public." Further down she said:

a) I support 100% “maximum inclusiveness of content”, yet there is always a boundary to everything. Since OTW is already an influential org, we need to protect our image and hold a better image to the public. I want the public to think of us as an inclusive and socially responsible community. So in general, we have to do something to change. Things like making the rating system more specific and obvious to users will be what I want to do. b) Not really restricting the content being posted. I hope it is like more warnings and ratings for posting work so people know what to expect. And all of these are not surprising to people who do not wish to see this.

I took this to mean "she wants to clarify to outsiders that ao3 does not host csam, is not only for erotica, and update the ratings and warnings system." I don't think that those things are necessary or should be a focus of the org, which is part of why I didn't vote for her.

Other people took it to mean "Tiffany is against pornographic or underage works and wants them to be banned." Some people took this, combined with her nationality, to the conclusion of "Tiffany is a secret plant of the Chinese Communist Party who wants to join the board, get all the ao3 user data, and then have the users from mainland China arrested" (despite the fact that this is not information the board would have access to, if for no other reason than ao3 is blocked in China so anyone trying to view the site from mainland china has to use a VPN anyway.) Some people are upset that the OTW elections committee "allowed" her to run in the first place, because they think that not letting anyone with opinions the current board or elections committee didn't like is an absolutely great precedent to set.

There are a bunch of comments on tw.org, and some in fail_fandomanon, that give more context to her comments in terms of Chinese fandom (though most posters still disagree with her position.)

This got... longer than planned. But to the question "Is tiffany getting elected actually bad" - If my interpretation of her statements are correct, I think it would be annoying, because she does not have the experience I think that being on the Board requires, and focuses on priorities I disagree with. Which isn't to say she'd never have a valuable perspective or ideas about something, but there are four other candidates that I think are much better suited to it at this point in time. If the people who think she is an antishipper bent on censorship are correct, she could probably make life very annoying for the rest of the board-- but considering the rest of them are not pro-censorship, I can't see how she'd have much influence in that direction in the org as a whole.

If the people who think she's doing espionage on behalf of the CCP are correct, then... look, I can't even finish that sentence because I find the idea of the CCP deciding that a) they need to get ao3 user data and b) the way to do that is to run a clearly unqualified candidate in a public board election absurd.

the tl;dr of this tl;dr is that there's a lot of fearmongering going around, and a lot of accusations and hate (and racism. let’s be real a lot of this is racism) directed her way. I don't know her, so I don't know what her "real" opinions are, but regardless of who wins the board election, ao3 is not going to be censored any time soon.

if for no other reason than if the Abuse team was told on top of all their other work, they now had to assess and remove fics reported for being "problematic", they would say "we'd prefer not to" and then proceed to not do it.

It's awesome that people are realizing the board elections and OTW membership are a thing now, though. We kept talking about how to encourage membership, and "running a very dramatic and wanky election" did not occur to us. In retrospect, I don't know why.

#otw #again not speaking for the org #otw elections #the current wank #op #asks #anons #answers

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babiebom · 2 months

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Hello hello. I just recently stumbled across your blog and in celebration of the 1.6 update (and also just outta pure curiosity), I wanna ask about the SDV bachelors reactions to a farmer who's ace/uncomfortable with intercourse but still wishes to pursue a loving relationship with them. If this ask isn't up your alley, feel free to disregard it. Hope you have a good day ✌️

A/N: hiiiiiiiii!! Obligatory I am not a part of this community(I am cishet lmao) so I am just going to have to try my best!! I am not ace or aro or anything but like never feel bad for sending an ask like this!! By the time you see this it’ll probably be like next week or something bc I do take little writing breaks so it isn’t absolute trash but I hope when you see this you enjoy it!!

Tw:mentions of sex, some cursing maybe,

Bc: idk at least 5 or 6 for each bachelor

Stardew Masterlist

Sebastian

Is this a joke?

No? Okay.

Would be disappointed at first because let’s face it dude is constantly horny

But would get over it rather quickly like just because you don’t wanna have sex doesn’t mean he can’t run one out

And now that you’re dating it’s easier than ever to do that because he finds you so attractive.

So not really all that disappointing when he thinks about it, really

Sam

Dude for real? Like ever? I mean I guess that’s okay

Sex isn’t the top thing on his list so it’s fine

Like yeah he would like to have it but it’s whatever

Would rather give up skateboarding and music than give you up so not having sex is easier than that by a long shot

Can he still get kisses tho??? That’s all he’s really worried about

Shane

I think the least affected and disappointed out of the bachelors

He has more things to worry about than having sex

It’s not that he isn’t attracted to you

It’s that you loves you for you and sex is the last thing on his mind when he’s thinking about bettering himself and taking care of Jas and his chickens the list goes on

Would actually be so chill when you have this conversation like “yeah okay, that’s fine.” And would never make you feel bad about it because he honestly doesn’t mind

Elliott

Tries not to react on the outside.

I think before you two start getting hot and heavy it probably wouldn’t have come up

Because I think Elliott would want to be a gentleman and not bring it up until you do

And during a particularly heated makeout session he tries to take it further to test the waters when you stop him in his tracks

And he’s like oh…okay!

He’s good with whatever you give him

Sometimes he’s disappointed when he gets the urge but gets over it very quickly because he obviously knows how to handle those feelings himself.

Alex

“Like…at all?”

Would be high key disappointed because dude likes to fuck tbh

BUT at the same time you aren’t just some random whose pants he’s trying to get in

You’re quite literally the love of his life (if anyone asks him he will never say he believes this because he’s scared of rejection)

So it takes a minute but he accepts this with literally a “welp back to using my hand” mentality

Like when he thinks about it, sex is literally the least important aspect of your relationship, he fell for you because of who you are not because he just wants to fuck.

Harvey

I think he wouldn’t really be disappointed but like dang y’know?

Like he doesn’t care that much about sex to really be disappointed

But does enjoy the act of sex, especially with a person he’s connected to like you two are

So it’s not as far as disappointment but is still like oof okay.

Out of all the bachelors understands the lbgtq+ community better than the others so isn’t really all that surprised when you talk to him about it.

He knows what it is and doesn’t mind, you don’t have to explain yourself, you’re valid how you are he doesn’t mind and he won’t and doesn’t want to force you to do anything.

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familyvideostevie · 2 months

Text

hey.

okay. hello! i'm back. :)

maybe you noticed, maybe not, but i have been away for a while.

i wish i could say i've been out living my life, so caught up in happiness and joy and loving each day that i've just not had time for tumblr. but....that is not true. i have been having a tough time! being away has been good, as i've had time to do other things that i like and to put energy into my own well-being, but it hasn't been the best time, I'll tell you that.

i peeked on the dash every now and then to keep my queue full and reblogged soothing things to my main blog and tried my best not to feel guilty about it all (i was also booping on April 1 lol). i just...I really needed a break. i've really enjoyed being here the last six or so months as i've changed my blog and entered the pedro/tlou space but i've also felt so, so alone.

and i know that it doesn't really matter!! like, we should all take breaks and go outside and all that stuff. and I know plenty of people are not very active, but this blog has been such a vital part of my life and happiness since I started it almost two years ago, so any lapse in activity feels like a loss. I've met lifelong friends and flexed my writing muscles and learned a hell of a lot. the fact that I have started to feel isolated and alone on here is a sort of personal betrayal, and there is no one to blame but myself.

So, I’m pulling back.

it means a few things — i don’t know how much writing I’ll be doing from now on. For Joel, especially — it’s been wonderful to meet folks in that community but it has also been really detrimental to my passion for both the game and writing. I’d like to return to some other characters on my masterlist, but we’ll see. I’ve got endless personal projects away from tumblr that I want to pour love and time into (my non-reader fics, my newsletter, a romance novel, a sci-fi novel, poetry, etc). I need to fall in love with my own work again.

it's a me problem, I want to stress that. i'm working on it! irl stuff has been kicking my ass. I've had a really, really hard winter and my mental health has suffered probably more than ever before. i let things I love -- like this blog -- fester and become negative and no longer being me joy. writing became stressful and difficult and I was focused on notes and interaction and looking around me and seeing success and then looking at myself and only seeing lack.

but that's why I took a break! i am getting help and support irl, i am putting in the time and effort to feel better about being alive and to be a better friend and person all around. And I want to tell you all about it because I am so grateful for your time and attention and support, even if we’re just strangers on the internet. i know this probably seems silly -- who cares about a fanfic blog? well, i care! i care a lot! it matters to me and therefore it matters!

anyway. on to the important stuff. here I am! and here's what's going to happen on this blog:

I am working on replying to asks and reblogs and comments I missed. Thank you for being patient with me! I don't know if I'll get to them all but know I see them and I am honored every single time.

I made a totally separate ao3 account with this blog url. I'm working on uploading everything I've posted here onto there and hopefully will continue to crosspost. It is going to take a long, long time, so please be patient! (you can follow my other ao3 here for my non x-reader fanfic).

I posted this fic! Jackson!Joel pulled me back into his world. It’s the first thing I’ve written in ages, so let me know what you think. as of now it's the last planned fic for that series, but who knows!

I hit a milestone while i was away that I am absolutely blown away by. I'm planning a celebration around it sometime this spring (hopefully) and I’d love to see you participate :)

lastly, thank you so much to my friends for letting me complain, whine, winge, etc. I am so sorry for missing all of your work, your celebrations, your bright energies, and all the rest. i am so sorry if it seemed like i was ignoring you. you are my guiding lights, my silver linings, my touchstones. you make me want to be here. i will try to make it up to you!

I want to be online less but make sure I’m connecting more in the moments that i am here. I want to pressure myself to write less and not feel bad that I’m not engaged all the time. I want this blog to once again feel like a place that nourishes me and not sucks me dry. i want to stop feeling like shit about all of it!!!!

so. come hang out in my inbox, my dms, let me know what you've been up to. I am really sorry for missing so much. thank you for sticking around. <3

#personal #this is very long but please read it maybe?#emma rambles #I will reblog it a few times probably

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w8lkers · 9 months

Text

★ | freak

carl grimes x fem!reader

note : not my best writing, but i liked the concept :P does not follow the canon.

warnings : the insult “freak”

new outsiders were recently welcomed into the community of alexandria. a group of outsiders, consisting of seven people in total. to carl, one of them was more noticeable than the rest. it was a girl and she also appeared to be missing an eye. that’s what carl assumed anyways, why else would someone wear a bandana over half their face?

he was shocked that her first words to him were “what are you staring at, freak”.

hearing that question almost stunned him into silence. almost.

all he could possibly muster up was an awkward sounding, “um- what?”. by the heat on his face, he could tell that there was an embarrassing amount of red on his face. this was far from his best first impression.

carl avoided her from then on, realising she might’ve needed some space to adjust to alexandria. maybe he could’ve stared at her less… but he couldn’t help but feel a bit offended by their first encounter, it left a sour taste left in his mouth every time he thought about it. it was both a humiliating and upsetting experience for carl. he didn’t mean to stare at her, he just couldn’t help be a little curious. the only person carl ever saw without an eye was the governor, the reason he refused to wear anything other than a bandage over his eye.

as the other members of the group got more acquainted with alexandria, carl was able to learn more about her - not from her directly of course, but from the other members of her group. he learnt her name was y/n. it was a pretty name, he thought so at least. carl also learnt that she lost her mother recently. that information had him awake for a couple nights, unable to sleep at the recurring thoughts of his own mother’s death. carl understood that pain.

he was slowly understanding why she was so hostile to him. when carl lost his mom, it consumed him. every waking minute was spent hearing her screams on a torturous loop in his mind. that kind of loss makes a person angry at the world and hungry for revenge, sometimes people become blinded by it. he knows he’s had his fair share of moments that he wished he could forget.

there was still the question on how to approach y/n. despite her appalling first impression, he was still curious enough to want to talk to her and clearly observing her from afar was the wrong way to go about it. carl went through multiple different scenarios in his mind, all the different ways he could approach her. more sleepless nights burdened carl’s evenings as he spent them debating with himself over what to say.

one day, he became fed up with thinking about it. his lack of sleep was beginning to show through some passive aggressive comments that rick certainly did not appreciate.

carl marched up to y/n, who was sat on the porch of the house her group had been given. unfortunately, his confidence dissipated the moment he met her eye.

“um-.. i-“ he barely got anything out before y/n interrupted him. she blurted out a question, an uncomfortable expression across her face.

“how did you lose your eye?”

it took carl a few seconds to gather his composure. yet again, another interaction with her that has taken an unexpected turn. at least she didn’t call him a freak this time.

“i got shot.” he doesn’t know what else to say, but he purposefully leaves out anymore detail. it wouldn’t be a good look for alexandria if he said he was shot by an.. ex-resident. there’s an awkward pause and the two just staring at each other. carl can tell there’s something else she wants to ask, but he almost doesn’t want to ask in case she insults him again. he’s rather have some of his dignity intact at the end of their interaction.

it takes y/n an almost unbearable amount of silence to ask, “do you have any spare bandages?”

“um.. yeah, but you could go to the infirmary, we have supplies here- i can show you how to get there if you want?” he’s mostly confused by the question and seeing her wrap her arms around herself in an almost defensive manner furthered his confusion.

“nice try. i’m not leaving the house empty, so someone can come and snoop through our stuff.”

some people took longer to trust alexandria, he understood her current mindset. hell, he’d been there himself.

“look, no one here is after you. it’s not as bad as you think it is and the people here aren’t going to hurt you, if you just give this place more of a chance-“ interrupted yet again.

“i’ve heard this speech from almost everyone here, i don’t need to hear it again.” she was annoyed. this wasn’t going as well as carl wanted it to.

“sorry..” carl mumbles, looking down at the ground in embarrassment. he looks back at y/n and she’s still looking at him. it was slightly unnerving, carl had no idea what to expect from her. another insult, or maybe another personal question.

“i can go get you bandages and come back..?” his voice sounded slightly hesitant, though his offer was genuine.

y/n’s eye narrowed slightly in suspicion, yet carl was unphased by it. he expected her to be guarded, the people she arrived with certainly cautioned the people at alexandria about the attitude she developed.

“really?” she sounded unsure, as if she couldn’t tell if he was being serious.

“sure.. yeah.” he has a small, slightly weary smile on his face that looks more like a wince to y/n.

“okay.” y/n looks down at the ground, her voice becoming quieter as she speaks again, “thank you..”

“yep.” carl spins on his heel and walks away from her, quickening the pace of his walk in the direction of the infirmary. he lets out a deep sigh of relief, it wasn’t going as badly as it could, but he still felt slightly on edge.

“here.” carl tosses each item he retrieved from the infirmary to y/n and she catches them, placing them down in her lap.

“thanks.”

“you’re welcome.” carl smiles hesitantly at her.

“cool..” y/n mumbles, looking down at the roll of bandages, a roll of medical tape and a few plasters.

“have you ever put a bandage over.. your eye? i know i struggled the first few times i had to do it.” carl is reluctant to stop talking to her, strangely she was pleasant to be around when she wasn’t insulting him.

“no, i’ll figure it out though.”

“are you sure? i don’t mind helping you-“

“no.”

“i get it, okay? you don’t trust us yet, but we’re good people. i just want to help, whatever’s under there isn’t anything i haven’t seen before.” carl gains a little more confidence in himself and his words, he stands a bit straighter - he’s determined to prove her wrong about alexandria.

y/n spends a few seconds digesting his words. on the one hand, she could be mean and he’d leave her alone, but on the other hand, she knew she needed help. her mother was the one who tied the bandana over her eye once the wound she had healed. she never took it off after that, but the members of her group began lecturing her about ‘appearances’. the bandana was torn, dirty and even seemed to be charred at some parts.

“come inside.”

carl follows her inside the house. the group had clearly started to decorate their home a bit and carl takes note of the photographs on the wall. unfamiliar faces that he couldn’t recall seeing with the group and he knew why.

“so, how did you lose your eye?” carl asks, following y/n into a bathroom.

“i lost it in a fight with a hungry squirrel.” her voice was nonchalant and carl almost thought she was serious for a second.

he chuckles and stands by the bathroom counter, unravelling the bandages, “you’re funny. how’d you lose it?”

“the world is full of rotten people.”

“not alexandria though, there’s good people here.” carl glances over at y/n as she slowly unties the knot holding the bandana in place around her head. she pulls the fabric away from her face and she turns her head slightly to try shield her eye from carl’s vision.

“you really like it here, huh?” y/n almost sounds bitter about it. he could see why. carl was comfortable, he felt safe in alexandria, but y/n was most likely feeling the opposite.

“yeah, it’s nice here..” carl lifts the bandages and wraps it around y/n’s head to measure the length he would need. using a small pair of scissors he cuts the bandage into a strip long enough to wrap around her head, “i like it at least, it takes some time to get used to though.”

“i got stabbed.. that’s how i lost it.” y/n speaks quietly, looking up at carl once she knew she couldn’t avoid it. he needed to put a plaster over eye, he was going to see it, so she might as well tell the truth.

“people don’t think about it as much as you’d think,” carl speaks as he puts a plaster over her eye, he had seen the damage, “my dad tells me the same thing, but it’s hard to believe someone when their eyes keep going from your eye to.. not your eye.”

y/n laughs. it was more of a chuckle, but it still brought a smile to carl’s face. he didn’t comment about it, but instead revelled in the moment for a few seconds. he worked in silence as he helped y/n secure the bandage over her missing eye. he didn’t mind the silence much, at least now that he knew she didn’t hate him.

“i’m sorry i called you a freak.”

carl smiles at her apology. he didn’t expect her to apologise, but he clearly underestimated her, “it’s water under the bridge.”

he was nice, y/n knew that. it almost felt too nice after the experiences she had with strangers before arriving at alexandria.

“there’s still good people left. i know everything inside you is probably telling you not to trust this place, but it’s safe here.” carl pauses for a few minutes, trying to find the right words to say, “a few people might say some wrong thing, but it’s not on purpose. sometimes.. they just don’t know better, but they mean well...”

“okay.”

“i’m carl by the way.”

“i’m y/n.”

“i know.” the words slip out of carl’s mouth before he can stop himself. the last thing he wanted to do was come across as a creep, “sorry- i just overheard janine talking about you.”

“cool.. thanks for the help.”

carl now has a genuine smile on his face, it didn’t look uncomfortable and forced this time. he nods at her and tidies up the the supplies he used, putting them into the cupboard.

“you know.. there’s gonna be a party.. thing? it’s at the end of the week, but alexandria throws them every time there’s new people..” carl pauses and then continues talking, “it’s not really a party, but the last time they had one here was when me and my group arrived. you should go.”

“i’ll think about it.”

she very obviously didn’t trust him yet, but it seemed like she was trying. her behaviour may come across as abrasive and cold, but it was nothing carl hadn’t seen before. eventually she would have to warm up to him, right?

“cool.”

#carl grimes #carl grimes x reader #carl grimes fluff #carl grimes angst #carl grimes fic #carl grimes x fem!reader #carabalism

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sirfrogsworth · 3 months

Text

If there is a post discussing ableism there is a decent chance a disabled person is writing it.

I really appreciate the work this person did transcribing that post. I am always grateful when people make my work more accessible.

But I am really getting tired of defending myself on this.

My disability makes me very tired, reduces my concentration, and kills my willpower.

For a long time I thought that last thing was me being lazy. That's what my own father thought for a long time. And I was often scolded when I was younger for being lazy. And to this day I struggle with feeling depressed when I cannot be productive.

But willpower is a fickle thing and I do not believe it can be explained simply by calling people lazy.

I have nearly a thousand unfinished posts in my draft folder because I simply ran out of willpower to finish them.

Inspiration is fuel. Sometimes it is the only thing I have to overcome how tired I am and how hard it is to stay focused. And if I lose the inspiration to do something, there is a good chance I will not be able to finish it.

When I set out to create one of my typical high effort posts, the process looks roughly like this...

Research any topics I am unfamiliar with.

Gather any images I need.

Brainstorm what I want to write.

Write a first draft.

Write a second draft.

Write a third draft.

If there is humor in what I'm writing, I will do a joke pass.

Then I do a grammar check.

I keep doing grammar checks until I find no more mistakes.

Then I do a quick fact check and google anything I am not 100% certain is correct.

Then I do a polishing pass and address any formatting issues.

And if I get this far, I publish the post.

By the time I get to publishing I am usually very tired. I no longer have any ability to concentrate. And the willpower to put any more effort into the post is long gone.

It's not that I don't want to transcribe images. It's that I just don't have the willpower to do so.

It is just not feasible for me to go back and transcribe everything. I don't want my posts ending up with those thousand unfinished drafts.

There is also the matter of not knowing if my post will reach 10 people or 10,000 people. I can't justify using up all of that energy for 10 people. My energy is my most precious commodity. I have to be very careful how I use it.

Disabilities vary wildly and lately I have seen a lot of disabled folks struggle to see the world outside their particular limitations. And that is frustrating. If we are going to be a strong community and advocate for ourselves, we need to learn more about each other's needs and limitations.

I'm not saying this person intended to call me lazy. But, if I am being honest, reading this felt like those days of my dad calling me lazy and wishing I had a better work ethic like my brother. He was a great dad, but he was not perfect. Especially when I was younger and we didn't understand my health issues.

So before you criticize someone please try to consider if there is a legitimate reason to do so. Maybe look at their tumblr and read their bio. Or check out a few posts.

I can be too quick to judge. It's something I have to work on as well. But this is the last time I'm going to apologize for not doing extra labor on my posts.

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meowzfordayz · 1 year

Text

a little loving, and look how tall you’ll grow (look how beautiful)

Uzui Tengen x Reader

Word Count: ~800

CW: body insecurity, explicit language, Fem!Reader, mild sexual content

Emergency Request Fulfilled: Can I have a comforting fic or something with Tengen with a reader who's extremely insecure about having small curves? Like no butt, no boobs, none of the always thirsted after aspects so she feels like nobody could actually find her attractive. The wives could be included if you want to write that too!

“Are you ready?” Hina asks, rapping on your door.

“No,” you shout, staring stiffly at your half dressed figure reflected back at you, full length mirror not nearly as kind as your partner’s tone.

“Are you even coming?!” Makio huffs impatiently (you’ve loved each other long enough to know she’s only upset that you chose to get ready alone) as she joins Hina outside your door.

You hesitate, taking a moment to imagine a night with the gigantic house to yourself. A night without the incessant, adoring chatter of your partners; a night without constant fidgeting, wishing you’d chosen something more comfortable; a night to spiral into your meddlesome, traitorous thoughts; A night staying in where I belong. Shaking your head to dispel the crowding darkness, you inhale deeply.

“Hellooooo?” Suma yells, shoving her way between Hina and Makio, “Baby, we’re all waiting for yoouuu!”

You sigh quietly—still too dazed to respond properly—assuming you’re safe within the confines of your bedroom… and then Tengen forces your door open.

“I heard you sigh,” he declares, looking devastatingly handsome as he stalks toward you, “What’re you sighing for?” quickly eyeing the beginnings of your outfit, grinning widely, “You look phenomenal!”

“Tengen, you absolute brute of a man,” you groan exasperatedly, waving frantically at your poor door, while doing your best to avoid the concerned stares of the beautiful women entering your bedroom.

“Don’t even try deflecting,” he drawls with frustrating perception, “If you’re tired, then we can have a lazy evening in,” voice easing as he takes in the extent of the tension in your stance, “You just have to communicate,” his unspoken We love you obvious as his careful hands reach for you.

You’re frozen as he touches you, not because his affection’s unwanted, but because his affection’s Too much, too much, fuck.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” Suma coos softly, making herself cozy on your bed, legs crossed as she watches you.

“This is why we get ready together,” Makio grumbles fondly, heading to your closet, “You look incredible in literally anything, yet take the longest to decide what to wear.”

Of course, they know your shallow breathing and hazy focus stem from something more sinister—something capable of decaying the brilliant, divine being that they’re willingly devoted to—but they also know, from previous experience, that blatantly addressing the root of your self loathing is usually too aggressive and inconsiderate of an approach for you.

“My love, what’s troubling you?” Hina murmurs, fingertips pressing lightly into your shoulders while Tengen kneads delicately at your hips.

You blink once. Twice. Gathering the nearly depleted courage in your gut, eyes closing as you whisper.

“It’s the boob thing.”

Perhaps not the most eloquent explanation, but your partners understand immediately.

Gasping, Suma gushes both dramatic and honest, “We absolutely adore your boobs!”

“Your boobs are wonderful,” Makio nods firmly, winking as she stares pointedly at your chest.

“Being curvy has its perks,” Hina speaks gently, “As well as its consequences,” exchanging glances with Makio and Suma, “There’s back pain, uncomfortable bras, cumbersome workouts, feeling insecure in revealing clothing, feeling valued solely for your body-”

“Not to mention stairs hurt,” Makio chimes.

“Plus, going braless is sooo nice, but sometimes seems impossible,” Suma adds.

“And if you’re worried about your sex appeal,” Tengen hums soothingly, “I can assure you that we’re all the more satisfied and grateful with you in our lives.”

“It’s not like Tengen can really fake an erection,” Makio snorts, “And he certainly never goes limp with you.”

“I don’t go limp when it’s just you and me either,” he tacks on, before you can rebut Makio’s observation.

As suffocating as their compliments and reassurance feel—four partners really can be a lot—they’re simultaneously needed, the rough sob in your throat finally audible as you crumble into his embrace. Warm silence fills your bedroom, Hina curled protective and strong against your back, your front cradled by Tengen’s steady heartbeat and secure arms — determined and committed tethers for your doubt and fear. Suma soon latches onto your right side, and Makio your left, familiar heat and mingling of scents calming your distress.

“Tengen,” you hiccup, his shirt damp from your tears.

“Hm?”

“You can’t keep breaking doors like that.”

“I second this admonishment,” Makio smirks.

“For sure,” Hina giggles.

“But then we wouldn’t be here comforting you,” Suma pouts.

He decides to take your scolding in stride, relief unfurrowing his brow as he feels the vibrations of your laughter, eyes rolling as he confidently remarks.

“I can always fix it later.”

—

Spoiler Alert: he can’t.

#tengen uzui #uzui tengen #tengen x reader #uzui x reader #sound hashira #drabble #modern au #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer

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howdoesagrapewrites · 11 months

Note

Hello

I really really loved your yandere poly pavitr

And I was wondering if you could write a situation where the reader noticed the crazy behaviour and try’s to escape them or they have a big fight about it and they try to get them back or comfort reader?

𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙣 𝙖𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙫𝙤𝙞𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙚𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢

Cw: yandere, reader x lovesick!Pavitr Prabhakar x lovesick!Gayatri Singh, angst, hurt/comfort, arguing, unhealthy relationships

Notes: this happens after the reader tried to escape in Bound by Webs

Yellow wallpaper. Yellow wallpaper with little flowers decorating it. Yellow wallpaper with around 5,128 flowers decorating it, you couldn't settle on the exact number. Yellow wallpaper with 5,128 little flowers decorating it, and a clock that sometimes seems to be broken. You also tried to look at other details in your room, but nothing seemed as comforting as counting flowers, you didn't have to think of anything else, except keeping in mind the exact number you had until then, otherwise you'd have to start again. There was something about counting flowers in the yellow wallpaper that felt more normal, that felt better than going outside of your room to see what your life had become after that day in the alley.

You had needs, so you ate, you drank water, you interacted, but your captors didn't take rejection kindly and you didn't take kindly to being woken up from your daydreams. So of course fights broke often, mostly with Gayatri, Pavitr refused to engage with you entirely when you were trying to communicate all the distress you were in, that angered you even more. One day you just snapped and slapped him, his cheek now red and starting to swell, you wished this would wake him up from his delusions, that he would express some sort of clarity, even if it was to hurt you, you longed for the unmistakably human response of wrath, confusion, sadness, something, something that would make him see things as they are. But he just rubbed his cheek slightly, and kissed your forehead while holding your wrists.

"It's okay, you'll feel better soon, I know you didn't mean that" He left the room and closed the door, not even slamming it, you screamed in frustration, where's your boyfriend? Where's the man you feel in love with? The one that's funny, witty, sassy, charming, kind of a nerd, full of energy, he was so many beautiful things, and now he acts like a dog, he only ever wants to be close to you or Gayatri, you don't even know if he's spiderman anymore, if there's anything left of him.

You screamed and cried, but none of them came, you don't even know if that's a blessing or a curse. You understand why this is happening, it's because you tried to escape, because you deceived them, you manipulated them. You're the boy who cried wolf.

Sometimes you are numb, and all you can think about is how you should try to escape again, complete apathy to anything but survival, but there another times when guilt completely washes over you, when Gayatri's words repeat over and over, like a broken record. "If we're monsters, you are too, and you need to accept it." Gayatri did have a point, you weren't at all that normal, not after all you've experienced, and you cling to those last remainings of sanity, you tell yourself how you're supposed to react, to act, how a normal person should react in a situation like this, but it's getting tiring, and confusing. But you were too scared to let go of it, you felt like you're clinging on a tiny float at open sea, you are sure you'll be swallowed by the wild waves at any time, but prefer to have a slower, more difficult death, to fight the inevitable instead of letting go and peacefully letting the waters envelop you like a blanket. When you're not in that situation, it's easy to think you shouldn't dwell on it, you die either way, but now, it's the decision that will change the course of your life, and you can only take one route.

"I made your favorite" Pavitr placed a plate of a delicious looking dinner in front of you, you forced a smile and tried to not look at it like eating was a chore.

"love, why don't you tell me about your day?" He cheerily asked Gayatri

"Not much, I was waiting for you and doing some work stuff on my laptop" she complied with the small talk and continued the meaningless exchange, her pupils seemed heart shaped when she looked at Pavitr, she used to look at you that way too.

You were busy with your excessive chewing of the food, hoping it'd get you hungry, but at the third bite you couldn't do it anymore. "I'm sorry, I can't" you looked at Pavitr with shame, knowing that in his altered perception of reality, you just needed tender love and care so you'd "get back to health"

He nodded and tried to motivate you to eat a little more, even if it was slower, he was interrupted. "Don't you start now, Y/N. All Pav is trying to do is give us a nice dinner, and you can't stop acting like a brat" Gayatri was harsh on you now, ever since your escape attempt, she struggled to trust you again, but you knew she missed you, you heard her breathing outside the closed door of your room when you were counting flowers, and she kept preparing your chai the way you liked it, even if she always found it too sweet, Gayatri loved you and missed you, but she was hurt by you, she was defensive and wanted to send a message: she wasn't easy to manipulate, you couldn't play her for a fool again.

You felt your tears start to dampen your cheeks, Pavitr glared at his girlfriend. "I really don't want to, I don't want to act like this. I don't want to cause you any more pain, but my instincts keep telling me to run away, that this is wrong, that I'm in danger." Your voice breaks, and even with this sharp pain inside your chest, you feel relieved to voice this, you look at Gayatri, talking directly to her. "I'm not a good liar, all that time, I did enjoy every minute we were together, but all my subconscious yells to me is that I should hate you, and I don't know who to trust anymore" you look at Pavitr "I hate when you act like I'm crazy, but maybe you were right, maybe I do want to stay here, and all this running away nonsense is just that, nonsense. I-" you wanted to keep going, you could go on for hours, but you didn't have the strength, both Pavitr and Gayatri stood up from their seats and hugged you, you cried it all out, all you couldn't express, you blurted out muffled sounds of "I'm sorry", "I don't want it" but most importantly "I love you". You loved them, it so hard not to, even as you thought you were escaping, you couldn't convince yourself not to love them, you stopped crying and saw Gayatri's heart eyes, you knew you were far too deep in to escape. You would love them even as the void consumes them. The salty water of your tears tasted just like the dangerous open sea, you let go of the float and the water baptises you, rebirths you. You kissed both of them like it was the first time, and then you ate a bite of Pavitr's food. Exquisite.

#atsv x reader #atsv pavitr #gayatri singh #pavitr prabhakar #pavitr x gayatri #pavitr x reader #gayatri x reader #pavitr prabhakar x reader #spiderverse pavitr #pavitr headcanons #pavitr x you #pavitr prabhakar x you #yandere spiderverse #yandere pavitr #yandere pavitr prabhakar #yandere Pavitr Prabhakar x reader

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ihearttish · 1 year

Text

you’re making me high’

pairing: shuri udaku x black fem!reader ft; emerald haywood

word count: 6.5k

Synopsis: after you and shuri split, it is up to you to go about getting over the breakup. what would happen on a night out trying to do so?

warnings: ( 18+ smut) mean!shuri, adult language, fingering, thigh riding, (if you squint) strap!slinger!shuri, dirty talk, hair pulling, choking… (pure filth)

A/N; hii!! my names niya & wellll— i am quite VERY new to writing so cut me some slack please !🙏🏽 i do NOT mind constructive criticism, so feel free to give me tips or what not in the comments, i’ll only get better by you doing so :) anyways, i hope you guys enjoy this fic as much i as i enjoyed writing it! take care <3

tags: @abenomeiiii @playhousedistee @vampzxi @heejayy @amplifiedmoan @shurismainbxtch @inmyheadimobsessed @sapphicvqmpires @oceean ( comment to be added) 😭

dividers from @firefly-graphics

The club's neon lights flashed your eyes as you stepped inside, your heart racing with anticipation. you were out with your best friend Emerald, determined to forget about that ex-girlfriend of yours.

a break up in a relationship that could have been fixed is often the result of unresolved conflicts or communication issues.

in many cases, one or both partners may feel frustrated or misunderstood, leading to a breakdown in the relationship.

if these issues are not addressed, they can escalate and lead to feelings of resentment, anger, and ultimately, a breakup. exactly what has happened with you and shuri.

sometimes, it may be possible to fix a relationship that has ended, but it requires both partners to be willing to work on the issues that led to the breakup.

better communication skills, or making changes to the relationship dynamic. however, it's important to remember that not all relationships can or should be fixed. if issues that led to the breakup are too significant or if one or both partners are not willing to work on them, it may be best to move on. moving on wasn’t something you knew how to do in this case.

it simply hurt too much.

you and shuri were together for two and a half years. what didn’t seem to be something so temporary, was.

the arguments every day, the victimizing, going days without talking to each other, the list could go on. you just couldn’t take it anymore & apparently shuri was tired of it as well. they were all things that can go wrong in a relationship that you wanted to last forever (but did not), went wrong and boy did it hurt like hell when you finally sat down, had a drink, and realized it.

most days you would find yourself starting to miss shuri. most days you wish things would have went differently between the two of you. you wished that she wouldn’t have given up on you two so easily.

other days you think it was a good thing.

shuri was constantly running away from her feelings. it’s like communication was where she drew the line. it’s like it became a boundary, one of the things that can hold a relationship together, the woman you thought of as ‘perfect’ finally lacked something so important. disappointing.

the whole point of going out tonight was so you can finally get that damn girl off your mind. shuri was like your drug and you needed her. like an addiction, almost. you wanted nothing more but to hear from her again. you didn’t care what it took, you just wanted your girl back. however, you wanted her to come back on her own. even if she wasn’t good for you, after all. you missed your girl.

emerald pulled out a chair for you to sit on at the bar. you took a seat and removed your leather jacket.

this would be the first time being back outside for you. you were honestly a wreck. torn, even. emerald being your loving bestfriend who was always there as a shoulder for you to cry on about shuri and any other things that would stress you out, (mostly shuri) she promised to help you out tonight. she didn’t promise to make you forget and move on, but she did promise to help get your mind off it. maybe not forever, but at least for tonight. (failed miserably by the way)

“i can’t believe you were able to get me out here, em.” you say in an embarrassed tone. following up with a chuckle.

“i had to, i couldn’t stand seeing you like that, y/n” emerald’s lips quivered at her words. so damn sensitive. she was really overprotective over you and she never once failed to show it.

when things got rough with shuri, she’d always threaten to ‘beat her up’. you found that part funny, you loved em but judging the fact that shuri would mop the floor with her without question, for obvious reasons, you found it historical. cute, but historical. you gave your best friend a toothy smile and adjusted the way you sat in your seat.

“what you tryna drink, em?” you cock your head to the side, flipping your curly hair out if your face.

“you want me to be honest?” she smirks, looking down at you.

“i’d like that, yeah.” you giggle at her question. she drug her tongue across her lips. “another time.” she smirked once more.

“i’m fucking with the martini though, you?” she side eyed you. “i’ll have whatever you get.”

…

“y/n, you look beautiful tonight, by the way.”

“oh, so other nights i look gross?” you teased.

“what? that isn’t— that’s not what i meant! the hell?” babygirl was fighting for her LIFE. “i’m just fucking with you!”

you chuckled, causing emerald to give you the dirtiest look. “see girl, that’s yo problem now,” she smiled. “that shit gonna get you snatched up one day, watch.” if only you knew.

you and emerald’s night so far consisted of a bunch of drinking, laughing and conversations that didn’t correlate to shuri. this was something you really needed. although, somehow your mind continuously kept landing on shuri.

“dance with me, em.” you say sternly, standing up and holding out your hand, awaiting hers.

“shit, why not.” she threw back one final swig of her drink and sat the now empty glass down on the table before she takes you by the hand, following right behind you as you guided her through the crowd of bodies on the dance floor.

you and em were now at least two feet away from each other on the dance floor, as the loud music transitioned from a hasty song, into a slower song. you swayed your hips left and right. whining to the beat. you felt and knew you looked good tonight. your brown leather mini skirt began to raise up more and more.

as the melody picked up, you moved your hips in a gentle, smooth motion, almost as if you were floating on the dance floor.

your movements were graceful and fluid, as if you were in a trance, lost in the music. within every beat, your hips swayed back and forth, following the tempo of the song. your eyes were closed, and a small smile played on your lips as you moved to the music, lost in the moment.

🎶 “ ‘Cause I'm in love with that girl

So don't be mad at me

'Cause I'm in love with that girl

So don't be mad at me

So what, you're from the other side of the tracks

So what, the world don't think we match

I'll put it down like my love's on wax, guess what?

I'm in love with that girl

And she told me that she's in love with me “🎶

emerald had her glossy eyes on you as you moved your body to the music. she couldn’t take them off of your curvy figure.

she then took a step closer towards you and held her hand out, nearly wrapping around your waist.

“can i?” she asked, waiting for permission to touch you in such an intimate way.

“y- yes” you hesitate. you barely got to get the word out before both of emeralds hands were found now wrapped around your waist, she took your hand as she spun you around, your back now on her front. she began swaying her hips but you were standing like a damn statue. this took you by surprise.

“em, i don’t think-“

she lowered her head down to your ear, her curls brushed against your neck as you felt the warmth of her breath before she spoke. “i don’t bite y/n/n,” she promised.

“just vibe with me, yeah?” her grip tightened around your waist which caused you to let out a muffled moan. emerald noticed this.

still hesitant, you started moving your hips to the beat again. you and her were now moving in sync. the warmth of her felt nice, you felt very safe in her touch and you grew to hate every second of it.

you hated that you wanted to only be this way with shuri. you hated that your best friend, of many many years was making you feel the way your ex lover made you feel.

although you and shuri were broken up, waves of guilt flourished throughout you. shuri swore up and down this would happen. was she right? she said that if one day you and her were to part ways, you’d end up with emerald.

you denied it, of course. em was your best friend and you never thought you’d feel such things for her because of the friendship you shared. you were almost for certain that it was the same way for emerald.

she couldn’t possibly see you that way. so you thought. you two were only dancing. right? friends dance.

the song slowly transitioned into another and it was a faster tempo.

🎶 “ I'm looking for a girl like you

Well here I go

Now, now, now, who's the baby bobbing

Dipping, dodging, crying, sobbing?

Looking to be mobbing cause it's just clocking and robbing

Oh hi now, welcome to my town

The illy I town, you got kids lifting eyebrows

Every time you fly down, so lie down

Full maxing, seeing you laughing

With passion happening

Every action has a reaction” 🎶

you noticed em’s grip on you loosened so you stepped away from emerald and turned to face her. “emerald, i appreciate you for this you know?” you start. “and i really adore you for attempting to get my mind off things.” your body stiffens as you play with the charms on your bracelet, with the charms that were gifted to you from shuri.

“listen to me y/n.” she stepped closer to you and grabbed you by your arm, her grip was tighter than before, causing you to breathe out.

she pulled you closer to her. “i know you’re fresh out of an relationship that you wanted to go well so bad, i get it, okay? i do.” she looked down at your lips, licked hers and then looked back up into your eyes.

you were just inches away from touching each other’s foreheads. “but i can’t keep holding this in anymore,” your breathing picked up, scared for what she might say next.

“i have feelings for you, y/n/n. i’ve always have. it was extremely painful having you come to me about relationship problems because i knew— i know that if we were ever together, you wouldn’t have to go through any of that and i mean that,” her lip quivered at her own words.

“i mean it with everything in me.” she choked. it was silent for a minute. emeralds eyes roamed any sudden expression on your face, begging you to say something. anything.

“em, how long have you been feeling like this?” you finally spoke, now holding her hand. “ever since we graduated high school. i love the bond we share together, y/n/n. i’ve only ever felt this way about you. i guess i’m tired of you not seeing my feelings towards you, now.”

“i’m glad you told me, em.” your cheek was now wet from the tear you just let fall down your face. she brushed away the tears from your cheek with her thumb and pulled you into a hug. “sorry if i killed the vibe, you were just loosening up.” she chuckled. “no no, you’re okay, emmy, i promise it’s okay. let’s continue?” you reassured her.

she nodded her head and you separated yourselves about and began dancing once again. almost as if that didn’t just happen. what even did just happen?! your best friend confessed her feelings for you and you said—— nothing…

surprisingly, emerald didn’t say anything about you not telling her if the feelings she had for you were reciprocated or mutual. instead, she just had the biggest sheepish smile on her face as you and her danced with each other to the new song that was on. a much faster one.

you were still unsure if you truly felt that same about emerald, or if anything could possibly work out between you too because as of for right now, this very moment, all you could do was think about shuri. her touch, the way she’d look at you & how easy it was for her to have such a impact on you, shuri has such a hold on you and you can’t seem to get enough.

you turn towards emerald to start dancing on her once more when you wish your eyes deceived you when you came into view with the last thing you’d want to right now, this very moment. behind em, sitting down at one of the tables was your ex.

Shuri was seated across the room. your heart sank at the sight of her. to make matters even worse, she was seated with another girl, laughing and having a good time. at least, that’s what it looked like. the girl she had been with had dark skin and long ginger curly hair. the bitch was all in her face. you immediately felt a pang of jealousy and sadness.

it was so hard for you to move on but here shuri was, hugged up with some girl. if you were white, your face would be as red as a hot tamale. you stared long and hard into her soul and before you knew it, her eyes met yours.

the look on her face when she noticed you was malicious. yet, the look on your face gave very much… distraught. you wanted nothing more but for her not to know that her being here with someone else, some skank, got under your skin. instead, you took matters into your own hands. not thinking clearly what so ever.

one thing moving to another, you found your lips on your best friends. you wrapped your arms around her neck as your lips continued sinking into emeralds. hoping it was enough to make shuri jealous. or at least feel what you felt.

you were also hoping this was for nothing and that shuri could see you tonguing your best friend. the kiss became sloppy and hot. however, your feelings for em hadn’t changed, you thought. you opened your eyes and stared into emeralds.

the smile she had on her face made your stomach sink because you’ve only done this to get a reaction from shuri. when you looked back over to her, the look she gave you was devilish. if looks could kill- yeah, you know the rest.

you thought you were done messing with shuri and that you’ve made your point across. emerald had other plans. her lips smashed right back onto yours. this time, the kiss was 10x more passionate and your lips begged for more as you gave in and kissed her back.

her tongue even made it’s way into your mouth as she placed her warm hands around your exposed waist. she kissed you hard and soon, your lips parted.

she leaned down to whisper in your ear once again. “come with me?” she whispered. the desperation in her raspy voice sent a chill or two down your spine. you were about to go and make out and potentially have sex with your best friend. what a night.

you gasped at her words before nodding your head. she held her hand out behind her and you grabbed onto it, following her towards the private rooms the club had.

having to pass your ex, you shoot a glance and once you’ve passed her, you could practically feel her eyes on your back as you and emerald maneuver your way into a unoccupied room, hand in hand.

emerald used your back to slam the door shut as she roughly pushed you against the door. you knew where this was going and your breathing was uncontrollable at this point.

she grabbed your chin and forcefully but gracefully crashed her lips onto yours. the kiss was even more sloppier, even more intense than the first time you’ve kissed her. this girl was hungry and you couldn’t tell whether or not you felt the same way or if you were just in the moment. your hands roamed her body and so did hers.

she broke the kiss and backed away before walking over to the couch taking a seat. she sat down manspreaded, her hands rested in her lap. she starred deeply into your eyes and took her lip in between her teeth.

she then motioned for you come to her and tapped her lap. still in shock that all of this was occurring ever so quickly, you slowly made your approach to where she was sitting. still quite hesitant, but you’ve already dug yourself into a deep hole.

you straddled her, sitting on her lap. your front facing hers. she used her thumb and index finger to lift your face up to hers before she kissed you for the 3rd time tonight. you could practically feel her hunger for you growing in her mouth.

she brought her left hand down to your lower back, taking a drag onto your perfect ass. “fuck y/n.” your mouths separated. “i need you so bad.” she whispered, still trying to catch her breath. “have me.” you challenged with a smirk planted on your face. fuck, why would you say that?

emerald lifted you up off of her slightly, pulled your skirt up a bit, revealing the black lace panties you had on underneath. she pulled them to the side and pushed right back down onto her thigh. she grabbed ahold of your hips and you winced at the friction.

“ride my shit.” emerald said in a low voice. you began to grind up onto her thigh. your wet core drug against her leg slowly. “oh fuck!” you moaned out. she brought her lips to yours as she allowed you to fuck yourself on her, your pace picking up by the second.

you pull away and stopped grinding against her. “emerald, wait.” you got up off of her and pulled your skirt down a bit. “i just-“

before anyone could make another move, the door to the room you were in crashed open. not the normal way to open it though. the door was split right down the middle. the loud noise caused you to jump back, a familiar tattooed hand was seen poking through the new whole in the door and grabbed the handle from the inside, unlocking it and twisting it open.

once the door swung open, there in the doorway stood shuri. your problematic ex. shit.

“shuri, what the fuck?” you shout. “so this what we doing y/n?” shuri said with a low voice before she took one step in. “ain’t i say this would happen?” she shook her head in disappointment.

“shuri i—“ you cry out.

“yeah? you what? you’re about to sit here and let your so called ‘best friend’ have what belongs to me, hm?”

her eyebrows furrowed, putting both of her hands behind her back.

“shuri, you broke up with me!” you put base in that last part. “y/n, i broke up with you to prove a point. look at you, couldn’t even wait to open your legs again,” she took a step closer to emerald.

“gonna let emerod touch you in ways i used to? huh?” she yelled out. “well,” she chuckled. “she fucking can’t. nobody knows yo body like i do. nor would anyone love you as much as i do.” she dropped her hands from behind her back.

“who the fuck is emerod?” emerald questioned.

“you’re literally here with someone else, shuri.” you stepped up in her face. “i’m not fucking with that broad, we’re just friends.” she pointed out.

“same for me and emerald.” you say, backing away. yikes, that’s gotta sting.

“let’s go, emmy.” you grabbed her arm and started to walk past shuri but she hurriedly blocked the exit.

“you think i’m some fool? you put yo lips on that bitch. them same lips that was on every inch of my body not too long ago?” shuri spat.

“yo, who the fuck are you calling a bitch?” emerald stepped in front of you, now face to face with shuri.

“you not hard, get the fuck out of my face, em.” shuri spat back. “you know,” emerald backed up, grabbing her hand. “you don’t deserve y/n,” she brought your hand up to her lips and and kissed it. “i do.” she finished. “yeah?” shuri let out a dry laugh. “yeah. i could love her better,” she promised. “and i could fuck her better.” emeralds words made your eyes shoot up to shuri and then at her. “prove it.” shuri commanded.

the room grew silent for a minute. you’re not too sure what she was implying. “that’s what i thought.” shuri grabbed your wrist, and tugged you along behind her, walking out of the area the private rooms were.

“aye, what the fuck?” emerald grabbed shuri’s arm, making shuri’s neck snap back towards emerald and before you knew it, shuri’s hand went right across em’s face. “leave us.” shuri commands.

“y/n-“ emerald manages to get out, while holding the side of her face. “i said to leave us.” she warned. shuri then began to walk off once she thought her point was across, holding you tightly as you walked with her out of the club.

shuri walked you to the passenger side of her car. she then opened the door but you did not enter. “shuri, that was really uncalled for.” you tell her.

“she’s a big girl, she can handle it.” she replies. “but you literally put your hands on her, that’s not okay. i’d be a terrible friend if i leave here with you.” you shot back. “true,” she says. “that ain’t got shit to do with me.” she shrugs. “shuri.” you spat. “alright. i shouldn’t have reacted that way, but seeing you with her made me want to do more damage then what i’ve already done. just be lucky i didn’t.” she confessed and you sigh.

“if you want to leave with her, cool.” she tells you. “but, i do miss you and i want to talk things out with you.” she smiles. “i miss you too, shuri. i’m gonna go find em.” you grin. you look over to your left and see emerald pulling off in her car. shit. “looks like your coming home with me.” shuri smirked.

you got in the car and shuri closed the door once you were in. she ran to the driver’s side, got in and started the car.

most of the car ride was silent so far. you still had another 20 minutes to go being that shuri’s house was quite far. the silence was loud, the sound of the wind blowing filled your ears as shuri drove on the highway with the windows slightly rolled down. “how have you been, love?” shuri broke the silence. “i’ve been—“ you pause. “fine.” you breathe out. “you know i don’t buy that, right?” she looked at you for a second and then put her focus back at the road.

“then why ask?” you ask. “just trying to make conversation.” she chuckled. you missed that. her laugh, the way she knew you so well, everything. “so, you didn’t give what’s mine away during our time away from each other, right?” she asked.

“i didn’t want anything from anyone but you shuri. i was really hurt.” you tell the truth. “you was about to give it up to emerod tonight if i haven’t shown up.” she mumbled but you heard her clearly. “emerald and i only went that far to make you jealous, shuri. i seen you with that girl so i just did the first thing i could think of.” you tell the half truth. a part of you wanted you and emerald to do the do but another’s part of you was still unsure.

“what about you?” you ask. “i’ve been way too busy missing you, nkoszana.” you gasp at the nickname that you missed so much. shuri placed her hand on your thigh, like she normally would when you’d be in the car together.

you missed that as well. her touch made you tremble and she noticed it. “what took you so long?” you wanted to know. she glanced at you with a confused look on her face. “what do you mean?” she asked. “i’ve been waiting for you to come back to me. if i hadn’t been with emerald, would you still?” you ask with a pained voice.

“of course i would, i just wanted to be right about something. luckily you were here tonight, i was going to have to give in and pull up or something if i haven’t seen you tonight.”

“so is that why you broke up with me? to prove a fucking point?” you shouted at shuri. “what? no. i just was running away from my feelings. i’ve realized that it’s the only thing i do. i felt like i had too much pride to tell you exactly how i really felt and you didn’t deserve that so i just did us both a favor and ended things.” not knowing what to say to that, you were silent. “i can’t be without you, y/n. instead of running from my feelings, i want to discuss them, from now on. okay? i want to fix us.” she claimed.

“then why have you been acting the way you have been?” you shot back. “because you and emerald were all over each other. i was afraid.” she admits. “afraid? afraid of what, shuri?” you look at her. “i thought she’d take you away from me. you never seen what i saw when you two were constantly together. it mad me feel,” she swallowed. “misfit.”

she finished. “shuri, why didn’t you just tell me that?”

“you wanted me to admit i was jealous?” she chuckled. “yes. all of this could’ve been avoided and worked out, you know?”

“i do now. i’m sorry okay? now that you know, can i have back my baby girl?” her voice got low.

“i don’t know shuri, i don’t think it’s that easy.”

“tell me what i need to do then?”

“promise me you’ll communicate with me.” shuri bit her lip. “i promise my love. i’ll try for you, i swear it.”

you smile and put your hand on top of hers that never left your thigh. shuri chuckled and leaned in for a kiss. you leaned your head in as well. you pecked her lips a good three times, but as soon as you pulled away, shuri licked her lips hungrily.

you could tell you weren’t the only one wanted more.

you knew your girl.

you look at shuri and soon she looks at you as well. she bites her lip and began to start slowly rubbing your thigh in small circles, the way she knew you liked. shuri knew just how to get you going.

she looked back at the road but continued to rub your thigh. she hand slowly made its way to in between your legs. she stopped when she reached your fabric on your underwear.

you took a deep breath as she gave you a look that says “can i?” and you nod your head yes.

“let me hear you say it, mama.” that made your knees buckle in your seat, which earned a smirk from shuri.

“i want you to use your words, love.” she repeats. “can i make you cum?” she asked.

“fuck, yes shuri.” she wasted no time taking her fingers to your clothed cunt. she started to rub your pussy slowly, in small circles on your clit.

“look at you, leaking for me already.”

shuri slid her index finger down your slit, stopping at your entrance. “fuck!” you cried out. she then slowly inserted two fingers inside your dripping cunt, pumping into you slowly as you squirmed in your seat beneath her.

she rammed her skilled digits into faster as your moaning became louder. “unh! shuri, shuri, shuri!”

“damn baby, i missed the way you say my shit.” her pace sped up, she fucked into you harder, increasing sounds of the high pitched moans escaping your mouth. she curved her fingers slightly, this made your back arch.

she moved her fingers in and out of you so well while driving with one hand. wasn’t nothing new for you but somehow, it felt better than it ever has. “oh— fuck shuri. i’m gonna- unh!” you spread your legs wider, letting her into you as much as possible. “i’m so fucking close, don’t stop!”

“yeah? you gonna cum on my shit?” shuri curved her fingers up, hitting all the right places, causing your legs to tremble. “yes, i’m gonna cum. shit!” you managed to get out. “mmm i’m gonna, i’m-“ before you could finish, you whined at the empty feeling of your pussy that had been leaking all over shuri’s seat.

“wh- shuri! what the fuck?”

“you gotta wait til i get you home, love.” she brought her fingers to her mouth and sucked off what remained on them. “i wanted to cum now!” you yelled at her, sounding like a big baby.

“i didn’t want my seat’s messy. you’ll thank me later, mama.”

“like i haven’t made a mess on them before.” you mumbled. “what was that?” shuri shot back. “nothing.” you pouted and crossed your arms, sitting back in your seat.

shuri pulled into her garage in her apartment. “come on big baby.” she mocked in a whiney voice.

“shut up.” you scoffed and got out of the car. you both walked to the elevator, you pressed the button and waited for the door to open. once it did, you both walked in and shuri pressed the floor number as you rested your exposed back against the cold wall. you looked everywhere but at her, clearly still irritated that she played with your nut like that.

“you really got a attitude, huh?” she said before laughing dryly. you ignored her. “do you hear me talking to you?” she stepped in front of you. you looked at her and then looked away again. shuri took her hand and grabbed you by your neck, forcing you to look up at her. “you really don’t want to ignore me right now.”

“you know i have an attitude, why ask dumb questions?” you rolled your eyes. the elevator dinged and she let go of you. “go.” she said, smirking. you walked out and stopped outside of her apartment number. shuri unlocked and opened the door and pushed you inside. she picked you up and carried you up all of the stairs, entering her bed room, she threw you onto her freshly made bed. “still got that attitude?” she checked. “not gonna change nothing so it don’t matter.”

“let’s fix that then.” she stood over you. “strip.” she demanded. you sat up and slid off your skirt first, then your cropped top & your heels. you reached for your panties but shuri smacked your hand away. “leave these on.” you obeyed and looked into her eyes. she once again grabbed you by your neck and pulled your face into hers, kissing you sloppily.

her slipping her tongue into your mouth made you moan out. your legs wrapped around her body as she laid you down on your back. still holding your neck, she let go and began trailing kisses down it. your breathing started to pick up from the pleasure her kisses caused. the kisses turned into sucking and small nibbles, you were for sure you’d leave her marked up completely.

she moved down to your boobs, cupping the right one and taking the left one into her mouth. she then gave attention to the other one, resulting in many breathy moans coming from you.

she kissed down your stomach, making you shiver at her touch. once she made it to below your stomach, she unwrapped your legs from around her and left kisses up your thighs. she also kissed around your aching cunt, begging to be used and abused.

“shuri, please.” you cried out. “please what?” she looked up at you. “tell me what you want baby.”

“want you to taste me.” you say. “that’s my girl.” shuri smiled and looked down at your leaking front. she played with the now wet fabric if your panties. “these look good on you.” she praised.

before you knew it, you heard a ripping sound. “shuri? what the fuck?” shuri created a hole in your underwear. big enough that it exposed your entire pussy. “look at her, begging for me to fuck her up.”

she then took her fingers to your clit. she rubbed slowly in circles, while looking into your eyes. “watch me, okay baby?” you nodded before moaning at her touch. she put her head down and slid her tongue over your clit. she licked and sucked on it, making you squirm and whimper.

“fuck, baby!” you moaned out. she took two fingers and stuck them inside of your hole while she continued to eat your pussy. she rammed her fingers into you like she did in the car, sending you over the edge. you instantly felt yourself getting closer and closer to your orgasm as your hips bucked upwards into her face, riding it out. “shuri! i’m so close, fuck!” you grabbed her head, bucking your hips harder. shuri curved her fingers and pumped in and out of your harder as well.

“unhh! i’m cumming, i’m- unhh” you were a moaning mess. you felt yourself release in shuri’s mouth but the pleasure didn’t stop, shuri continuously slid her fingers into your dripping cunt. “mm, you taste so fucking good.” the vibrations of her words sent you over. she sat up and pulled you in to kiss her and you tasted yourself on her lips. once she pulled away, you laid back on the bed, out of breath. trying to come down from your high.

“you okay now, love?” shuri stood up and took off her shirt and her cargos, leaving herself in nothing but her black sports bra and matching boxers. she tossed the clothes in her hamper and sat down at the edge of the bed. finally calmed down, you sat up and crawled over to where shuri was sitting. you wrapped your arms around her and smiled ear to ear. “i am now.”

“where you at? one more?” she cackled. “one more baby.”

shuri got up and walked into her closet and you sat on the bed patiently waiting for whatever she had to offer up next. shuri returned with a strap you knew well. the one that she could feel whatever you felt. the one that you came on every single time she used it. she lifted you up and laid you in your back, but your head hung off the bed a little.

thinking that was a mistake, you scooted back so your head wasn’t dangling off but shuri grabbed your face and pulled it back, hanging off the bed once again. “nah, stay here.” shuri demanded. shuri hovered over you and you finally understood what was going on. she slid her thumb over you lip and placed a kiss on your forehead. before you knew, shuri slammed her dick into your mouth, roughly. “fuck! let me use that pretty mouth of yours.”

shuri grabbed your face and thrusted into your mouth, slamming her dick down your throat fast and hard. she fucked your throat as spit flung everywhere, sliding down her thighs and your face. she fucked into you some more until tears ran down your cheeks, you were feeling as if you couldn’t quite breathe properly but you wanted to make her feel good so you dealt with it.

she pulled out of your mouth, panting and throwing around curse words here and there. she didn’t cum yet so that was now your mission. completely fucked out, shuri laid you on your stomach. you arched your back for easy access and shuri angled her dick at your entrance.

she bent down and kissed your back before slowly feeling you up with her strap. “fuck!” you moaned out. she started off slowly thrusting into you. your ass smashed against her front repeatedly, making your big ass jiggle. shuri smacked your ass hard and you winced in pain. it hurt but it was a good hurt. she placed her hands on your hips and fucked into you faster & deeper, your skin smacking against hers.

“oh my- fuckk baby! unnh” you fucked her back, throwing everything you had against her. “you feel so fucking good.” shuri grabbed a hand full of your hair and pulled, lifting your head up. “you fuck me so well, shuri. mm” you praise. this caused her to speed up. making your head drop even though she was holding you up by your hair. “sit the fuck up, can’t even sit up for me, so pathetic.” she breathed out. she gripped harder, wrapping your hair around her hands a few times.

you were a whimpering mess, she slammed into your g spot over and over. she always did so well pleasing you but something really snapped within her tonight.

“i want you to flood my shit, baby. can you do that for daddy?” she managed to say. her pants made you even wetter than you already were. “unnh!” was all you could manage to say. “answer me!” she shouted. she slapped your ass making you hiss. “yes, yes, yesss. shuri, fuck!” you finally said. feeling yourself get closer and closer to your release. “that’s my girl.”

“but first,” she picked up the pace, digging deep into you. “you think em could ever fuck you like i do? huh?” she asked. “mm mm unnh” was all you could say. “use your fucking words, y/n” she fucked into you harder and harder. “no. baby, no. UNH. i belong to you. i’m all yours baby. fuck!” you told her what she wanted to hear and you meant every single word. “this my pussy?” she moaned at your words. “this all yours, shuri!” you cried out. “i’m cumming shuri, fuck!” the sound of your squelching wet pussy and you & shuri’s moans filled the room as you let go of everything you had.

“unh. i’m right behind you baby! fuck.” you felt shuri’s release intertwine with yours. she let go of your hair and you both crashed down onto the bed laying beside each other. the both of you were breathing heavily, trying to come down from your high.

shuri rolled over onto her side and faced you. “does this mean i’m yours again?” shuri asked you, pushing away the hair that rested wildly on your forehead. “you always will be shuri.” she smiled and pulled you close as she hugged you, still breathing heavy. “i missed you, my love.”

“i’ve missed you too.” your lips connected and she kissed you passionately while rubbing your back.

#Spotify #black panther #shuri udaku #shuri #shuri fanfiction #letitia wright black panther #marvel #letitia wright #princess shuri #shuri smut #shuri x black!reader #shuri x fem!reader #shuri x you #shuri x y/n #shuri of wakanda #marvel shuri #marvel cinematic universe #shuri fanart

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theprettynosferatu · 1 year

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A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

I - The Heroes

Luna MacKleere didn’t like the word “Rebel”. She was one, to be sure, but in her mind the term evoked anarchy, disorder, chaos. Maybe it was her past life as an Imperial officer, or maybe it was just the way she was wired, but Luna felt sometimes clear order was a necessity. The Rebellion had a chain of command, but it was a tad… diffuse. For all its virtues, the Rebellion often fell short in the “getting things done” category: strategy meetings could become endless debates in the name of equality and freedom of expression. To Luna, a little hierarchy didn’t necessarily become tyranny.

She was well aware of her reputation within the base. Humorless, strict, cold. She didn’t much care. She got things done, as the events of the day had proved. A screen lit up letting her know the newly-minted Heroes of Korriban would arrive shortly. The base was buzzing. She wasn’t upset because she had been the one to discover the Imperial outpost in that barren planet, planned the surprise strike, organized the entire operation: it was natural for the pilots and boots on the ground to get the glory. What irritated her was that for a good three hours or so nothing of real use would be accomplished as the new Heroes celebrated their triumph. Oh, well. She supposed it would be a morale boost, at least.

She did the best she could to tune out the cheers, the laughter, the singing. Luna wondered how the old Jedi had been able, if the stories were true, to keep their emotions always under control. Given how her chest pounded with irritation, she figured she wouldn’t have made a good Jedi even if she had been born hundreds of years before.

Eventually a knock on her door broke her out of such dark contemplations. She looked around to make sure everything was presentable: the room was both her command center and her bedroom. The base had been built with haste and stealth in mind, and living comfort had been sacrificed to keep it compact. Deciding the place looked respectable, she let the visitor in.

Kara Nalls was barely out of her teens; like so many in the rebellion, she was an orphan of the war the Empire waged against independence. Luna took pride in knowing the names and stories of everyone under her command. She wished Kara would get a bit more confidence, though. Even then, the petite blonde was almost shaking, dataslate in hand.

“What is it, Kara?”

“Ma’m, I have the manifest of liberated weapons, supplies and equipment right here. A full report should be made… uhm… later. Oh, and there’s… this”

Kara produced a small, black cube.

“We don’t know what it is, Ma’m. If it’s a container, there seems to be no way of opening it. But the boys say it was heavily guarded, so perhaps it might be of importance”

Luna took the dataslate and gestured for Kara to leave the box on her desk. She could look at it later.

“Thank you, Kara. Please make sure our esteemed warriors write proper reports when they’re done being tonguebathed by the entire base”

The rude words almost made the younger rebel recoil, but she caught herself.

“Yes, Ma’m”

“Is there anything else?”

“No, Ma’m”

“Then go out there and enjoy the party. I appreciate you taking the time to bring me the data”

“Thank you, Ma’m”

Kara almost skipped away to rejoin the celebration. She wasn’t the worst, but still needed discipline. They all did. Luna tried to put her mind out of the racket outside her door. She decided to enable communications and send the manifest to her rebel contacts. It was always a risky thing, for signals could be intercepted, traced: that was the reason only two people on base knew the codes to engage the transmitters. Sure, Luna could have waited until the full report was ready and sent everything together, minimizing risk; but she needed to focus on something, anything to dull the annoyance inside her. As the transmission happened, she idly looked at the black cube on her desk.

No, it wasn’t just black. It seemed to absorb all light, to pull it within itself and capture it to never be released again. Luna felt discomforted by the small accursed thing. What in the galaxy could it be? Well, whatever it was, she didn’t want to see it on her desk. She picked it up to put it away…

She couldn’t be sure, but for a second something like a sigil appeared on it, bright red. It was a flash, and then it was gone. Before Luna could process what she had seen or if she had indeed seen it, the box opened without a sound, its top moving on unseen hinges. Inside was something beautiful.

It shimmered copper and ruby, calling to her from within its nest of fathomless darkness. It was obviously valuable, and should be reported to the rest of the rebellion. That was the obvious, ethical, logical thing to do. However, Luna found herself hesitating, bound by a shapeless feeling at first, one that soon wormed its way into her head and solidified into words. Did the rebellion really need whatever the necklace could be sold for? Would it truly be so harmful for Luna to keep it for herself? After all, wasn’t the rebellion all about freedom? And more importantly, didn’t Luna deserve it? She was the reason the base got anything done, after all. Hell, even the celebration taking place was thanks to an operation she had planned, based on information she had gathered! But were people thanking her? Did they dance for her? Did they kiss in secluded hallways for her? No. She deserved a reward. Results had to be rewarded, that was the very basics of management. And no one would know. She alone had seen what the box hid. She had spent two years away from any luxury, working ragged, cramped inside a base that gave her little to no privacy or room, eating rations and wearing sensible, resistant clothing. She had almost forgotten how she looked, how she could look when she paid attention to her appearance. She had sacrificed so much… of course she deserved a little treat, a little beauty in her life. It was so obvious.

When she put on the necklace, she felt as if life was returning to her body. It felt so good to finally do something not for the rebellion, not for the fighting men and women, but for herself. And it looked good. It looked so perfect on her… too bad her clothing didn’t really do the necklace justice.

Well, she did have a few outfits saved for special occasions…

II - Confidence

It felt good to be out of the sensible white and brown clothes. Sure, it was cold. Sure, her formal dinner dress was hardly practical in case of a sudden attack. No, Luna didn’t care. She loved the way she looked, with flowing red silk, high-heeled boots and a generous cleavage that showed the pendant in all its glory. It was as if she was rediscovering a part of herself she had long left behind. She had been desired, once. Before the Empire. Before she broke away from it. Before uniforms became her default attire. Yes, she had been desired in her home planet. The scion of a wealthy House, fabled for her beauty and wit. She had wanted to escape that. That’s why she had enlisted in the Officer Corps. To spite her father. To get away. Now, she couldn’t remember why she had ever felt being the center of attention was a bad thing.

And oh, all eyes were on her, alright. Most looked at her as if they were seeing her for the first time. In a way, they were. Even she had forgotten how… impactful she could be when she chose to use her looks as a weapon. She felt like a conquering queen… or a predator on the prowl. Everyone around her looked so small, so weak, so pliable. Was this the rebellion? Was this the force that would topple an Empire? She felt as if she could just… take whoever she desired. Take them to do what? She couldn’t say. Hurt them? Use them? Motivate them?

Yes, perhaps motivation was needed. Confidence. They seemed so… run down. Luna knew the best leaders led by example. Well, she could be that example. She could show them all the passion the sorely lacked, the drive to victory that seemed so alien to them. Suddenly, there wasn’t a single doubt in her mind. If the rebellion was to have any chance of success, she would have to teach them to take what they wanted, to fight and manipulate and feel the drive to grasp victory by any means necessary. Ambition. Yes, that’s what they lacked. Well, she’d teach them ambition.

Someone caught her eye. Tadriec was staring at her. Tadriec. Thin as a reed, obedient and respectful to a fault, generally looking like a little desert mouse caught in a trap. Was he a virgin, Luna wondered. She couldn’t imagine him doing anything but staring at any object of desire from far away. In a way, that was the rebellion right there. Too shy, too meek, too willing to settle for small victories. Well, if Luna was going to show them a new way… what better place to start than small, frail Tadriec?

“Tadriec, come with me”

“Why, me, ma’m? I… uh…”

The man was about to start shaking. He looked like the very picture of pathetic meekness. For a moment, Luna felt like striking him across the face, or digging her nails into his skin, just because she could, just because he would do nothing about it. Weakness invited abuse: was it any wonder the Empire regularly abused the people under its control? It was a two-way path: yes, the tyrant is terrible, but those too weak to stand up for themselves invited and enabled that tyranny. Perhaps a more hands on example was in order.

“Just be silent and follow me”

“Yes ma’m”

As the door to her quarters slid shut, Tadriec started mumbling in fear.

“I… uh… if you need anything, I… if I may, the door…”

“Tadriec, be quiet”

“Yes, ma’m”

Luna leaned on her desk, letting sensuality flow out of her. She could almost see it, a black and red tendril enveloping the poor, weak rebel.

“Look at me, Tadriec”

“I… I can see quite clearly. Uh, I don’t believe I’ve seen that… attire before, ma’m. It is quite beautiful; is there a ceremony or…”

“Look. At. Me. Tell me, Tadriec, what do you desire?”

“Desire?”

“Yes. What do you want? What would bring you joy, satisfaction? You are aware with the concept of desire, I presume”

“I… of course. I’m nor sure what… well, if I could… uh… I suppose victory over the Empire would make me happy. Peace would make me happy”

“Oh, how very noble of you. Allow me to be more specific. Do you desire me?”

“Uh, I… desire… uh… I’m not sure I understand the…”

“Do you desire to take me? To take this body and use it however it may please you? To make me go on my knees and take you in my mouth, to bend over like an animal in heat and let you mount me, pull my hair, make your every fantasy real? Do you desire to fuck me? To fuck me hard, take out all your frustrations and emotions and passions on me?”

The man’s next words would be inconsequential, Luna knew. His body already spoke volumes about how he felt, even if he wouldn’t dare say it out loud. She amused herself, watching him shifting uncomfortably, trying in vain to hide a bulge in his oh so sensible rebel uniform. This has to be how a Krayt Dragon feels before devouring their prey, she thought.

“I… I’m not sure it’s appropriate to… uh… I mean, you do look… quite attractive, but…”

“You desire me. Every movement you make screams it. You need to make me yours. My question is: why don’t you? Why are you so afraid to simply… take what you want? Why not turn me around, pin my hands on this desk? Why not push me up against the wall? Why not make me an object for your pleasure?”

“I… uh, that’d be… that’d be wrong! Wrong and… and inappropriate, and…”

Wrong. How would it be wrong to follow one’s heart? Luna couldn’t fathom the reasoning, and found herself with little patience for it. Fuck it. Time for a practical demonstration. She leapt out of the desk and took a few steps, until she could feel his nervous breathing on her face, their lips almost touching.

“I am your superior in command”

“Y-yes”

“Then you will do as instructed, is that clear?”

“I… yes ma’m”

“Then I’m instructing you to bend me over, lift my dress and plunge your cock inside me as hard as you can. Make it passionate. Make it hurt, if you want. But do it!”

He was too gentle. Far too gentle. He turned her around, carefully, almost shaking. He used minimum pressure to push her head down. Even now, even as he should be overcome with pure lust, he takes care of her, makes sure she is comfortable. Such a disgrace. Sheer weakness.

“Fuck you, Tadriec! Stop. Holding. Back! Are you such a coward? Such a useless pussy? Take it all out on me… you resentment… your fear, your anger, everything! Use me just as an object for your pleasure! Stop denying yourself what you deserve!”

Luna gasped as she felt him go inside her. Part of it was the rather unexpected size: she never would have imagined the skinny rebel packed such a… remarkable member. But what truly got to her was the feeling of it all. She couldn’t quite explain it, but there was a point, a very detectable moment when she felt the man’s emotions… burst forth.

It was unexpected and it was intense and it was intoxicating. Rage and lust and hatred so vivid she could almost taste them. The feelings washed over her, sending shivers all through her body, robbing her of the ability to speak, to do anything but moan and drool and cum, over and over again, all control long gone.

By the time she managed to regain some notion of herself, she was feeling his cum sliding down her thigh, panting on her desk. Shit. A woman could get addicted to such feelings.

III - Just a Dream

She’s standing in a dark place, an old place. A place of evil. She knows this, and it scares her. Statues seem to rise up to the stormy sky, and she’s aware of ruins, of ancient temples so deep and twisted a man could walk in and never walk out. There’s a way out of this place, this much she knows; but it’s cloudy, hidden in mists and creeping shadows. It’s terrifying how this place whispers to her. How it wants to feel like home.

But Luna has home, doesn’t she? She can’t remember. It’s hard to focus. Everything seems so distant now, like her life is hidden behind veil after veil after veil… She does have a notion, a barely formed sensation that she has made a mistake recently, a horrible and…

She feels it creeping up her leg, igniting her skin with a million sensations, a million passions. No, no, no… this is the mistake, she knows it. It’s coming for her. It will devour her, shift her, twist her if she allows it. She tries to run away, but it’s there and not there; a physical being and a manifestation of something monstrous growing inside her… she can no more escape it than she can escape herself.

She has to resist. She has to find the light inside her, lest the darkness consume her, turn her into someone she wouldn’t even recognize. But it’s so hard to find the willpower… so hard when the dark tendrils make her body feel so alive, so intense, so… eager. No. She has to…

It reaches between her legs, and she’s vaguely aware she could perhaps stop it, if she was strong enough. Is she that weak? Or is it that she doesn’t want to be strong anymore? A moan escapes her lips as her pussy twitches in pure, undiluted pleasure. It’s wrong. She has to hold back. She has to resist, to fight, to…

Why? Why not give in?

Did she think that? Did the darkness think it for her? She can’t tell. She feels herself accepting it more and more, letting it explore her deeply… her pussy, her ass, her tits… her body is just a vehicle for pleasure, for power, for…

No, she’s so much more than that! She’s a kind person, a rebel, a fighter for freedom…

Does she want to be all that? Or does she want to be something else entirely? She can’t say anymore. It just feels too good… too good to think… too good to resist…

Fuck it.

And with that thought, the darkness enters her fully.

IV - Improvement

Luna McKleere woke up with a purr. She stretched in her bed, letting the air caress her skin. She felt sensitive and strong and… hungry. Not for food, of course. The rations on the base were anything but appetizing. But the base itself… well, she was the most important person in it, was she not? After all, if she wasn’t around, nothing would ever get done. In that sense, wasn’t it her base? Her dominion? Her responsibility and her property? She got up, determined to improve her base, even if she had to drag every single sorry mediocrity kicking and screaming towards something resembling strength.

She stopped in front of the mirror.

Perhaps she should have felt upset, or scared. Shocked, at the very least. Confused, certainly. Instead she didn’t feel anything but a simple, calm satisfaction. Before her stood an image she had never seen before, and yet felt oddly familiar. Her already dark hair had turned jet-black, with a strange blue-ish reflection, like the feathers of a fearsome bird of prey. Her eyes were still green, but when the light hit them just right they appeared to have an unnatural yellow hue to them. She wasn’t sure if her lips had become fuller or if they only seemed that way because of the confident, seductive expression she now wore. What wasn’t in doubt was the size of her chest: that had definitely changed. She shifted around, looked at herself from a few angles. She had to say, her new breasts were a definite improvement. Sex appeal was power, a power most people, weak-willed as they were, often found unable to resist. Besides, there was a certain beauty in knowing she could inflame passions and emotions by her mere appearance. The rebellion needed a bit more fire, a bit more blood in it… even if that blood was concentrated on rather specific body parts. Her legs were stronger too, more toned, ready to step on whoever got in her way.

All in all, her body felt like a tool, one perfectly designed for its purpose. And oh, did it have a purpose. The entire staff needed to change if the base was to have even a chance of achieving anything significant, anything beyond small raids on mostly abandoned imperial outposts. It needed to embrace greater ambition and be willing to take bigger risks. It needed to heed impulse, accept strength, forget mercy.

Every group had its leaders, official or otherwise. People who set the tone, the pace, the spirit of the endeavor. For the rebellion to change, the leaders would have to change. Luna decided to turn her base into a showcase, a template for the rest of the rebellion to follow. That meant summoning the leaders of her small base into her room. She would show them the way, and they in turn would push the new philosophy to the followers, the meek and spineless men and women that made up most of the fighting force.

They all stared at the floor, trying oh so hard not to glance at her new, improved tits, at the way she left her jumper’s zipper half-open to make them impossible to avoid. She felt nothing but a sickly contempt towards the men and the one woman before her. They were there, but were they actually there? They felt more like shadows, insubstantial, nonexistent. Luna felt something growing inside her. Hatred? No, not that. They were beneath that, they didn’t even deserve that much from her. Their weakness, their meekness, their lack of focus, of ambition… disgusting. They could be so much more, if only they’d let go of their stupid fetters of morality, of propriety, of the rules of engagement. They had passions inside them, buried so deep… if only…

The pendant felt warm on her skin, nestled between her breasts. She couldn’t explain it, but it was whispering. It was beckoning. It made her feel powerful. It made her feel like an uncaged beast… and she could tell the others were starting to feel it too. Their bodies told the story in a million small ways. A small shiver there. A discreet glance there. A conversation without words, the air around them almost vibrating. No, not a conversation. This was conversion. Luna could feel it between her legs, sense the blindfolds falling from their eyes, the repressed passions bubbling just under the surface, ready to guide them, to take control. An inescapable truth of the Galaxy was starting to take hold: the strong took what they desired, and deserved everything they took, because they were powerful enough to take it. That was it. A simple, elegant truth. Luna slowly pulled the zipper down. All eyes were on her now, shame long gone, replaced by a primal hunger. Yes, she could feel them… and it felt so good, their passion was like a million electrical pulses starting right in her pussy and coursing through her body. She moaned and let one of her hands wander inside her pants. They were at a tipping point. Her smile was the final push.

It was glorious, a symphony of grunts and they all lost control at once and tore off their clothes. The men were so big, towering over her, hungry expressions in their eyes. Finally. Strength. Something she could respect. Something she could… kneel for. Beside her, the other female rebel had gone on all fours, her head pressed on the cold, metal ground. Ready to be taken by those with the will to do so. And now the men had the will. Luna focused on worshiping their cocks, licking them and kissing them and using her new gigantic tits to jerk them off, letting the men use her as nothing more than a living sex doll. She moaned as a rebel thrust inside her fellow woman without mercy, without pity. She could feel it all, beyond physical sensations. She felt their lust and their frustrations and the anger they blew off using Luna’s mouth, her tits; using the other girl’s tight, eager holes. She was all of them. Fucking and getting fucked. Slave and master. She was attuned to the energies saturating the room, sending her deeper and deeper into a state of complete, savage pleasure.

At some point someone pushed her on her back. She was too far gone to fully register who. All she knew was she was being conquered, and it felt so fucking good… Her ass burned as a man rammed inside her with not care as to how she might feel, with hatred for all the bitchy things she had done, with rage and a red retribution. A hand shifted her head. The other girl was positioning Luna’s mouth, so that it may be used by a worthy cock. The girl’s eyes looked… delighted. Evil.

Luna shaked as cumshot after cumshot painted her skin, aiming for her face, her tits. It was suddenly so obvious. So simple. She knew it, and she sensed they all knew it now. She didn’t have to tell them. She managed to get on her feet, feeling their eyes on her. Strength was Right. Those who conquered deserved power. Power deserved more power. The Empire was powerful. The Rebellion was weak. Nature had to take its course.

She put in the code enabling communications and typed the coordinates to her own base in. She set the message to be unencrypted, ready to be picked up. She set it to repeat, over and over.

She fell on the floor, an orgasm racking her body and whatever was left of the rebel she had been. The Empire would come. They would take. They would conquer. Because they were stronger. Because they deserved to rule over the silly rebels who deluded themselves by thinking they had a chance. Now the truth would come.

They would all be fucked, as they should be. Maybe literally. Luna didn’t care. All she knew, and all everyone in the room knew was that the base would fall to its superiors. As nature intended. As for them… they would wait for their conquerors. They would wait on their knees. They would wait sucking and fucking and letting their passions run wild.

The pendant hummed. It knew better than anyone the power of power, the allure of conquest. And now, after centuries underground, it had found a vehicle to spread the truth. It would make sure Luna was spared. It had great plans for the young woman, after all.

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bluestar22x · 4 months

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Falling

The Outcast - Falling

Summary: There is beauty in the heart of winter, especially when shared with someone special

Pairing: Pero Tovar x F!Reader

Rating: 18+

Word Count: 3,300 (ish)

Warnings: Longing, hard on and masturbation implied (not explicit), violence towards a rabbit (sorry buddy, they've got to eat)

Author’s Note: Not going to lie, I had a hard time getting this one out into words, but I did it. Also not going to lie, I listened to "Can you feel the love tonight" by Elton John to set the mood while writing this.

xxx

Of the many things that had eluded Pero in his time, peace was one of the most evasive. It had once been a friend when he was a child, innocent of the harsh realities outside his family's homestead, but it slowly wandered away from him as he was exposed to the world beyond, and it had finally fled him the year he'd lost his entire family.

It only worsened when he became a mercenary out of pure necessity, no longer haunted only by events he could not have prevented.

At times, even in war, the world could be serene, but not for Pero, whose thoughts darkened whenever they were left to roam with nothing else to turn to.

He had learned to hate complete silence. As much as he sometimes groaned over William's waffling, in the end it had helped ease his mind, fill it with anything but what the monster at the back of his head wished for him to focus on. Being around his friend had made life a little more tolerable.

It was different with you. You hardly spoke most days, unless you deemed it necessary. You seemed to thrive on it, the silence, and at first Pero envied you, until he stumbled into peace once more.

Sometime in the dead of winter he found it again, discovering it had not been as far out of his grasp as he'd once thought. It had just taken some coaxing, luring out by the nature of the way you lived and the nature that surrounded you.

In many ways living with you reminded him of his childhood. After over two decades he found himself once more secluded, left to focus on his basic needs and the needs of the animals he found himself caring for.

Many of his fellow mercenaries would have found it boring compared to the thrill of battle, one he'd had a love/hate relationship with, but he'd surprisingly settled well back into the lifestyle once he'd given it a chance.

In truth, this life could never be dull. Even with your quiet, even with your consistent schedule, the animals would not let it be so. On any given day a goat may escape its paddock or a horse might find itself tangled up in something (the latest had been Thor's nasty run in with some fallen branches from a hawthorn tree after he'd jumped the boundary of his pasture again).

Even when they weren't busy escaping, the animals sometimes got into trouble other ways or caused mischief.

You had one particular event you liked to remind him of most, to taut him with, on those days you were feeling playful. He'd been assisting you with the feeding of your billy goats one morning when the youngest, the almost pure white one who was appropriately named Trouble, came up behind him and gave him a good, literal nip on the butt for no apparent reason other than being a goat. Even with the padding of his pants between his skin and the goat's teeth it had still left Pero sore for days, not that he had admitted it to you. No, you had enough fuel from seeing his face when it had occurred. Had been thrown into a fit of laughter over it many times since, to his dismay.

Despite his grievances with that particular goat, he did find plenty of pleasant times amongst them, even smiling on occasion at their daily antics when you weren't looking, of course.

While he kept that side of himself hidden from you, and you kept pieces of yourself from him, you still both learned much about each other by just being in close proximity.

You'd learned enough to be able to communicate with each other without spoken word, something that became invaluable during your hunts together.

It was especially useful on the days when voices easily echoed through the forest.

On one such day, when the air was crisp and the sun bright, you walked your horses in single file through the thick forest a quarter mile from your cottage, the snow almost up to your boots before the horses plowed through. Pero was in saddle on Thor and you were bareback on Clover as you often were. With your knowledge of the area Pero always let you lead, not that he really had any power to choose. You were strong willed and used to getting your way. His presence had not done anything to change that. He wouldn't have wanted it to anyway; his respect for you was too great.

About an hour into the hunt you abruptly halted Clover and looked over your shoulder at him, head angled downward. He followed the gesture and glanced at the ground by her mare's front feet. After peering at the spot for a few seconds he noticed what she had. Rabbit footprints. A trail of them that happened to follow the same path you both were on, though the much smaller creature had been able to hop along without sinking into the snow.

He gave you a nod to assure you he'd seen the same thing and pulled the bow he was carrying off his back as well as an arrow from a quiver that he had strapped over his shoulder. It was yours, but you allowed him borrow it whenever he joined you on hunts. You had a matching one, except yours was more lightweight. Yours was spread out on your lap, your arrows on your hip inside a smaller quiver.

You encouraged Clover to very slowly push through the snow as you watched for the rabbit to appear ahead and Pero did the same with Thor. When your eyes set on a fallen log in the path, the white rabbit appeared from behind it.

Pero saw you tense up and scanned ahead, eyes locking on the rabbit in a matter of a second or two. He had time to lift his bow into position and nock an arrow before you could, only by a moment, but it was long enough for him to fire on the creature.

The arrow landed at the animal's hind feet and it bolted, startled by the near miss. Pero cursed loudly over his lousy shot, but you kept your cool, still eying the rabbit and moving with it as it put distance between you both.

It felt entirely too long to Pero, but it was just enough before you released your arrow and sent it flying right into the rabbit's chest, instantly rendering it lifeless, its body flopping over on a patch of bare stone.

You glanced back at him with a smug expression on your face, eyebrows hiked up.

He scowled at you. "Lucky shot."

"It's called skill, Pero," you boasted, a broad smile plastered on your face.

Sometimes you reminded him of William. William had been almost supernaturally good at archery, and you weren't too far behind. Neither of you were humble about it.

He wouldn't admit it, but he was thoroughly impressed by you, even though being far outdone by yet another person wounded his ego. I ought to stick to swords, he thought bitterly.

"You're just mad a woman is better at something than you are," you added as you dismounted to collect the dead animal.

You weren't entirely wrong. It did sting more, but it wasn't the only reason. Pero knew he was generally a sore loser. As far as he was concerned though, it was useful. He was certain he'd survived many a battle out of his pure unwillingness to be showed up by opposing soldiers and mercenaries.

You squatted to snatch the limp rabbit up by its hind legs and approached him, nodding to the saddlebag attached to his saddle by a couple tie down straps.

He unbuckled the flap that closed the bag and opened it up so you could stuff the rabbit's body inside it.

"You wouldn't need to use mine if you had yours," Pero said pointedly, still not understanding why she hardly used her saddle. She'd once told him it was for warmth, to share body heat with her mare, but the weather that day could hardly be called bitter.

"I never do," she told him. "I could easily swing the body over Clover's neck with a rope. But then I'd risk losing the meat while racing you back."

He had no time to react to her words before she swung back up onto Clover's back and kicked her sides, sending her into a reckless canter through the forest, along the same trail they'd just stomped out.

Thor pranced in place, yearning to run as well, and Pero muttered to himself about how pointless it was to do so before letting his reins loose anyway, giving the stallion permission to bolt down the path after you both.

He'd never done this before. Let his horse run for the sake of it, and as wayward branches smacked him in the chest and face he was quickly reminded why. Moving at such speeds could be dangerous and it was an unnecessary waste of energy for any horse about to see battle or any that were recovering from one.

Neither was the case for Thor that day, and when the trees gave way to field Pero suddenly forgot all his other concerns.

He could see you several lengths ahead, flying head long into the soft morning breeze on Clover's wide back, the horse kicking up powder as she threw herself into a gallop, albeit a slow one due to the snow not being quite trampled down enough to prevent her from sinking into it.

He couldn't see much of you besides your winter coat as he trailed behind you, but for a moment you had your head thrown back, nose pointed to the sky, and he could sense the joy, imagine the wide grin on your face. It made his lips curl up and his heart skip in a way he could not explain if someone had asked him to.

He urged Thor into a pace that would allow him to keep up, and felt the same kind of thrill you were likely experiencing bubbling up in his chest. The rush of adrenaline one gets when you take a risk, not for survival, but for the hell of it. He'd experienced it plenty enough during his youth to remember what it felt like. It was a more than welcome feeling after so long.

He'd almost caught up with you when the cottage came into view and you started to slow Clover down, though the horse was hardly breathless. Pero pulled Thor up beside you, face neutral, once more hiding the side of him he'd deemed soft from you.

"Rabbit stew?" you inquired, a smile still adorning your face. "My grandmother created a recipe in her twenties that's to die for."

He grunted. "If you intend to fatten me up so I cannot leave come spring, your family's secrets are indeed the best route to success."

You chortled at his comment, and he almost laughed too. Almost.

"Amma's famous rabbit stew it is."

Pero ate so much rabbit stew for both his meals that day that he fell asleep by the fire after the last, waking only after the night was in full force. There was a blanket draped over him that hadn't been there before and he smiled slightly at the thought of you taking the time to shield his body from the chill that often found its way into your home after dark. You were always looking after him like that, even though you didn't need to, even though he was very capable of taking care of himself.

He liked that about you most, your selflessness. The kind that led you to care for a stranger, though you were hardly strangers by then, were you? At least not anymore.

Pero stood with a groan, his stiff, aching back and knees ever reminding him of his last two decades spent in battle and on horseback.

He glanced around the cottage for you, but you weren't there, and he wondered if it was early enough that you were still out feeding the animals. He donned his coat and made his way outside, surprised by the calm, stillness of the night. Usually night meant bitter wind.

The weather was not all he was surprised by.

Instead of being behind or in the barn, you were out in the field in front of the cottage, your upper body lying flat on Clover's bare back, though your butt and legs were still properly positioned for riding. Pero trudged your way, wondering what in God's name you were doing on your horse so late at night, until he got close enough to see that you were gazing up at the clear sky above you, studying the thousands of shining white specks, stars, that were spread across its midnight blue.

The peace in your expression almost made him turn back, not wanting to spoil your alone time, but something had him rooted to the ground he was standing upon a few yards from you, watching, taking in the view. Not of the sky, but of you. Your silhouette blended with Clover's in the dark, as if you'd morphed into a very flexible centaur, and he realized then that you did not ride bareback just for shared warmth, but also because of the oneness you felt with her when the saddle wasn't present. Clover was always more responsive to you when you left the saddle in the barn. She could read you better, as you could her.

His conclusion had Pero scrambling to recall the last time he'd felt at one with anything or anyone, but his mind blanked out. Though he'd been close to other people emotionally, had experienced physical intimacy of every kind, spiritual closeness had evaded him as well as he'd avoided devotion to any religion.

He had never yearned for that kind of connection until that night, as he observed yours with Clover and to the world around you. He could have watched you all night, lived vicariously through you.

You felt him near you before he could.

"Beautiful night," you declared, only just loud enough for him to hear. You did not turn your head to look at him, you just kept on talking, your eyes still focused on the heavens above. "It's not often it's clear enough to stargaze in the winter. I could not resist."

He cleared his throat. "No need to resist because of my presence. I will leave you to it and return to the cottage, if I am to presume the animals are already fed?"

You nodded confirmation that they were and sat upright, using nothing but your core strength to do it, and he had to adjust himself in his pants before you looked his way, aroused by your motion. If anyone asked, he could not deny his attraction to you, but he knew he could not act on it. You had shown no sign of feeling the same towards him, and he was your guest, so he dealt with his discomfort however he could when you weren't near enough to overhear him.

"I'd rather you join me for a ride," you said as your eyes fell upon him.

He arched his brows. "At this time of night?"

"I want to see if the dancing lights are out," you explained.

"Dancing lights?" Pero was lost. He had no idea what you were talking about.

"It's worth the trip to the top of the mountain," you promised. "Trust me."

Who was he to resist your plea?

He agreed to the ride and headed for the pasture, leading Thor out by his mane.

You frowned as you rode Clover over to the fence line. "Aren't you going to get your saddle?"

Pero stood at Thor's shoulder and readied himself to climb on, using a large rock to give him a little extra height. As tall as he was, he hadn't tried this in a long time and mounting from the ground with stirrups was already difficult enough for him.

“Not tonight,” he replied shortly, swinging up on his steed. It wasn't easy, even with the assist from the stone. He almost slipped back off by Thor's shoulder, but managed to cling on and straighten himself out, though his grunts of effort probably could have been heard for a mile. At least you seemed amused by his lack of grace, choking on the laugh bubbling up in your chest. As embarrassed as he was, Pero liked the sound of your laughter.

You forced a cough, trying to compose yourself, then silently guided him away from the farm, starting up the steepest side of the mountain, without any supplies.

He followed you hesitantly, praying a sudden storm would not form.

You rode towards the top of the mountain with a relaxed confidence, only occasionally twisting around to make sure Pero was still close behind.

He hung back a few yards, attempting to appear at ease, but you could tell your impromptu trip had spiked some anxiety within him. You wondered how much was because of who he was and how much was from his near death experience.

You felt an unexplainable twinge as you thought back to the fateful day that you'd found him. If you had never known him, if you'd been too late or hadn't stumbled upon him, you wouldn't know who you were missing, but you did know him, and there was pain in knowing how close you'd been to not sharing your life with him.

It was dangerous to your heart, thinking in such a manner, but even if all you could ever be were friends, even if he left in the spring and you never saw him again, you knew you wouldn't trade this winter with him for anything. Wouldn't trade the moment that came next as you crested your mountain and the rest of the chain it belonged to materialized into view, all eight of its companions snow capped and massive in their own right, most even taller than the one you'd claimed as yours.

But it wasn't the mountain range's beauty that you focused on that night - it was the glowing, dancing, green wavy lights in the sky that kissed a few of the other peaks.

You'd witnessed them a few times each winter since you'd moved into the cottage, but the lights never failed to cause you to catch your breath, to marvel at the beauty of it. You did not know why they only sometimes formed at night during the winter, why they formed at all, but you didn't need to know to enjoy the view.

"Do you have these lights in the south?" you asked Pero as Thor came to a stop alongside Clover.

"We do not," he answered, studying the sky before him, eyes narrowed, as if he were trying to figure out the source of the mysterious lights. "But I have heard of these lights before, from other mercenaries."

"Aren't they magical?" you questioned dreamily, staring ahead.

You heard him huff. "Magic does not exist. Just because we do not understand it doesn't make it supernatural."

"That's not the kind of magic I'm talking about," you told him, glancing in his direction. "I meant the kind of magic that we know has an explanation, even if we have not figured it out yet, but is still wondrous to us anyway. Like how a babe grows in their mother's womb, or how sometimes the ground shakes for no apparent reason. Episteme will not change the feeling I have every time I am blessed with witnessing these lights."

Pero nodded in understanding. "They are indeed, wondrous."

You glanced over to him again, finding his eyes on you instead of the lights, and your heart pounded in your chest as he smiled at you briefly. A real smile that filled your belly with warmth.

You wondered then if he felt the same for you as you did him, or if you were reading into things too much. If you were simply just a friend to him, a sister, maybe, or something more. You were too afraid to ask. Too convinced it didn't matter.

After all, come spring he would part from you, and you'd be alone once more.

You couldn't see the benefit in exposing yourself to that kind of heartbreak.

You wouldn't admit to yourself you'd already fallen.

xxx

Tagged: @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed

xxx

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

xxx

#Pero Fanfic (Mine)#The Great Wall Fanfic #X Reader #The Outcast Series

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desceros · 5 months

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Re: ableism w/Symphony Donnie: Definitely some internalized ableism but I think that’s unfortunately due to not many people knowing what exactly neurodivergence looks like and how people with it processes things differently.

Like, honestly, my biggest gripe was the recording and even that, for the SPECIFIC context of this story and Donnie as a character, it makes sense. Does it make it right? No, but if Donnie never had to think about these things before, for him it’s the same as recording everything to protect his family. Just something he does.

Also, even though my heart broke with Reader’s at her realization, MULTIPLE times reader has said Donnie says what he means and even at the beginning with the “I like you” thing I was like, “Girl, I’m going to need you to define the relationship with him.”

And I think, with Leo, even when writer’s do write him as neurodivergent, what I’ve read always has him as the he better masker whether it’s explicitly said or not. Idk if Symphony Leo is neurodivergent or not but STILL, reader has picked up that he’s good with masking which usually comes off as charming or “easy breezy beautiful cover girl”.

Idk, maybe because I know a lot of people like Donnie irl but if anything I was more frustrated at the obvious miscommunication between both of them than him directly, because as reader said, she projected her feelings on to him when he’s been super direct with his intentions.

Basically, there are sometimes where I wish people would just realize that processing the same thing between two people doesn’t always look the same and that one isn’t necessarily bad.

well-said, anon-chan!

edit: this got SPOILER!! HEAVY!! for chap. 22 and also soooo long so i'm going to tuck it under a cut. but here's some meta on symphony to explore this a bit since it's something that's very important to me and also... pretty critical to the fic itself! i don't typically like explaining myself outside of the text and letting the fic itself speak but. hm. i suppose i shall let it slide for today!

as you all have hopefully noticed by now, as an author, i like to be. hm. more subtle with things. i prefer to tuck things away versus having things be blatant in the text. and this is kind of coming back to bite me a little with donnie and his neurodivergence, i suspect.

i've tried pretty hard to make it contextually obvious that donnie's autistic. i've all but used the word. the way he behaves and communicates is heavily autism-coded.

meanwhile, the story is from viola-chan's pov, and she's neurotypical-coded (well. as much as i, an adhd-riddled autistic cat in a trenchcoat can manage).

as a result, she doesn't... pick up on donnie's problems with communication. not right away. but here, in this chapter, we see where she finally figures out what their issue has been the entire time:

…Oh. Oh god. He really doesn’t get it. You’d known, of course, that Donnie wasn’t great with people. That he doesn’t communicate well. He doesn’t pick up on cues, or use them himself. No wonder he’s always so frank in his language, you realize. No wonder he’s so comforted by the firm rigidities of science. No wonder he looked so lost. No wonder he was so perplexed.

then, she puts that into practice by being specific and precise with how she talks. and we see that she now knows how to communicate with him in a way that works for both of them. and it works for them:

God; it’s like—a breath of fresh air, you think, staring at him in a little bit of awe. It’s so easy to talk to him, now that you’re just… letting it all out. Being honest. Frank. Infuriating that you hadn’t done this earlier. Feeling your irritation deflate, you nod. “…Okay. You just—need an explanation. Clarification.” “Yes, please,” Donnie gushes, fretting a little.

it's going to take some work. she still takes things he says personally and extrapolates past them (the whole "leo being an important person" thing). but she immediately nips it in the bud and is like. no. we're not doing that anymore. so, going forward, her relationship with donnie is one that's built on learning how to develop this open communication.

of course, it's not perfect, because they're human. donnie twisting her arm into still talking to him by calling in the favor is shitty behavior. a desperate bid to keep someone close that, for some reason, he can't imagine being without. not cool. the recordings of them having sex were shitty behavior to us, people who Know Better. but when violist-chan said 'hey, that's not cool, don't do that' and donnie was given a reason why not to, he just says ok. he might not understand ("but i record everything"). but he acknowledges that there's a concern there, and he agrees to be more conscientious in the future (having a consent sheet).

now then, let's look at leo's behavior in comparison.

donnie's biggest fault was that he didn't know to check in and make sure they were on the same page with everything. leo's fault, on the other hand, is purposeful, manipulative, and cruel. his open admission that he's been manipulating her from the beginning. manipulating donnie. lying to her.

to me, this is much, much worse than what donnie did. even knowing that at some point he starts developing friendly feelings towards her—and some of their interactions were indeed genuine!—i'm with violist-chan here. i'm not going to be digging through every one trying to parse out which ones were real and which ones were him being a dickhead. they're all tainted by the stain of betrayal.

also. because it has come up in a different ask that i will be publishing probably tomorrow bc of spoiler reasons: someone said something to the effect of 'why didn't he just not say anything? he could have taken that to his grave. how selfish'. i will remind you of a conversation between violist-chan and leo that happened in the previous chapter:

“Most of all, he’s honest,” you keep going, tangling your fingers together, staring down at the way they knot at your waist. “If he says something, I can take it at face value. There’s no hidden meaning. Nothing deeper. If he says something feels good, I know it feels good. If he says he likes something, he likes it. If he doesn’t like it, he doesn’t like it. If he asks for something, I don’t need to ask if he’s sure. He asks, so he’s sure. It—It’s a breath of fresh air. If I want to know what he’s thinking, really thinking, all I have to do is ask. And...” [...] Leo’s still as stone for a few moments longer, looking at you like he’s trying to decide if he wants to say something; but finally he relaxes and comes back to you himself. Reaching out, he flicks your forehead, causing you to wince and rub at it.

i think... leo maybe wouldn't have ever said anything about it. but then you said this. how donnie matters to you because he's honest. there's nothing deeper with him. it's all at face value. you never have to worry about what he's doing, what he's thinking. and that i think... really messed with leo. because he knows he hasn't been honest with you. you can't trust what he says at face value. you do have to worry about what he's doing. and for you to say that that's the main thing you love about donnie—it messed with him. so, even though he knew it would jeapordize the relationship with you, even knowing he wanted to put this off for as long as he could, even though, even though, he decides he has to tell you. he has to come clean.

so even though it feels like shitty, selfish behavior... it's actually him trying to do right by her for a change. to conform to what she looks for in a relationship (both romantic and platonic). it just... didn't go over so well, predictably. most people don't like hearing that not one, but two of their most precious relationships were built on a foundation of misunderstandings or lies.

side note. i do headcanon leo as having adhd that primarily manifests itself as an inattentive form. i don't suspect it has much to do with his behavior here... save perhaps for some possible rsd being triggered when violist-chan is like 'ok actually go fuck yourself i'm out of here.' i don't find it particularly relevant to the discussion of ableism, in this context.

so anyway. long post aside. it's... interesting to me. to see people saying 'actually fuck both donnie and leo equally!!! bleh bleh bleh!!!!' i don't know that it's. hm. active ableism. i'm certainly not accusing anyone of the sort. but it is, at the very least, indicative to me that there are a lot of people who don't read into the text as deeply as perhaps i would like on certain character traits, if i had a magic wand to wave.

....and also perhaps just ableism, haha.

#ask tag #symphony tag #rare desceros meta post #symphony meta

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sleeping-sirens · 1 year

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hey nimi, i hope you’re well! i really loved the drabble you did “morning with haechan” and i was wondering if you could write a scenario with mark maybe teaching f reader how to speak korean + every time she gets it correct, he’ll reward her with a kiss or smth (i like to think mark would actually be really affectionate to his partner) 🥹 thank you <3 this was inspired by mark helping jaemin speak english, it was such a sweet scene, here’s the link: https://twitter.com/markclty/status/1640862192810569728?s=46&t=Tq9aSdZbZ4voR3kbqgerrw

가르쳐 줘 (teach me) 𖤐 lee mark

pairing : idol mark x f reader.

genre : lots of fluffffffff, domestic, established relationship.

summary : what the request said, and i also was inspired by his moment with jungwoo in their relay cam where each had to come up with a word that starts with what the previous word that’s been said ended with (idk if i explained that right but you can watch it here if you still haven’t 🥹).

word count : 2810 words.

warnings : mark whispering that’s my girl this is a huge warning😵‍💫 and maybe suggestive towards the end? other than that everything is just so cute and wholesome 😭🥹🫶🏼

a/n : hey anon! i hope you enjoyed this! sorry it took too long i was just trying to organize my thoughts as my brain is just rotting with heachan 😵‍💫 but i wanted to prioritize your request before i can proceed with writing my haechan thoughts down haha 😋 also i wanted to thank you for reading and enjoying my morning with haechan drabble that’s so sweet from you!!🫶🏼🥹 and i would be EXTREMELY happy if you could tell me what you think of this through an ask😭 i’d love to hear your opinion as i already did a request before this one and i’ve never gotten any feedback so i was a bit sad :(( anywayssss without further ado, please enjoy!!💘💞💕💖💗💓

masterlist

buy me a coffee🥹🫶🏼

the kitchen was quiet again after you turned off the water boiler. with the tea bags already tucked inside the two mugs on the counter, you poured the hot water and watched as it quickly changed its color, from clear to deep red. the steam created small clouds that kept disappearing into the air as you took your mug in both hands to warm your palms before placing it on a platter, followed by your boyfriend’s.

the gloomy weather outside made you feel calm and collected, and your body moved smoothly around the kitchen as you tried to cut some pieces of cake, along some strawberries and bananas for you and your boyfriend to munch on while chilling in the living room. it was a sunday, a rare day for mark to have some rest and just relax at home and you were so happy that you guys were going to spend some time together after ages of him being busy.

from the small distance separating the kitchen and the living room, you could hear him talking on the phone. you heard him say 엄마 (eomma) a few times, and you could easily understand that he was talking to his mother on the phone. other than that, you were quite clueless about what he was saying.

sometimes you’d feel so left out of his life, you wanted to be part of everything that made him be the person that he was today. mark never once made you feel a difference because of the language barrier, you guys communicate easily in english but sometimes you just wish you could understand more than just a few words of his mother tongue.

you bit your lip slightly as you gazed at him from your standing position in the kitchen. his voice was smooth, almost dripping with warm honey, the words sounding more gruff and slurred than usual, which signaled that he was indeed relaxed but also very tired that just one day of rest won’t be enough to make it up for all the work load that’s been on his shoulders.

your eyes softened on him, your tea long forgotten as you just relished in the sound of his small and sweet voice. he looked so cute curled up in the far side of the couch, head lying in the arm rest as his fingers raked mindlessly through his disheveled blue strands of hair.

his eyes would close for longer seconds and sometimes he would just opt for humming an answer instead of taking the time to formulate a coherent one. your heart swelled as you looked at him.

“my baby…” you sighed under your breath.

your gaze was lingering on him too long he felt it burning on his skin, which made him throw a look up in your direction. his tongue poked the corner of his mouth while a smile bloomed on his lips, his eyebrows jumped up his forehead into a questioning look, asking you if you were okay with a tilt of his face but you just smiled at him, shaking your head.

“tell her i said hi,” you whispered to him and he nodded in response, quickly translating your phrase into korean.

you were fascinated to say the least, you’ve always been. the way mark quickly switched from english to korean, or sometimes mixing both the languages in one phrase was effortlessly attractive to you.

at first you tried to learn the language secretly from him, thinking about surprising him with it in the future, but as you went on, your hopes have diminished as it got harder with every grammar lesson, and not to start talking about the vocabulary… mark knew that you started learning korean and everyday he would be so proud to be with someone like you, to be loved by someone like you.

the fact that you decided to sacrifice some time out of your day to learn the language that he grew up with, the language that linked him with his family and his roots, the language in which mark felt home made him fall even deeper in love with you. and he was always so happy to help you with it.

“i’ll never be enough for you,” you sniffled, letting go of the pencil you had between your fingers before hugging your knees closer to your chest.

when mark saw the effort you were making in learning his mother tongue, his heart swelled and grew larger inside his chest, that he wanted to physically grab it and put it back in its place.

“sweetheart, why haven’t you told me?” he scooted closer to your body that was sitting on the floor, pushing your notebook and pencil case aside and engulfing you in a warm embrace. “i could teach you,” his fingers gently rubbed your arm in a comforting manner. he made you feel so loved with just small and tender touches.

“you would?” you whispered, finally looking up at him.

mark wiped your tears with the back of his index finger, a love foolish smile illuminating his face. “of course i would. let me see your notebook, we’ll start with the basics.”

that was the conversation you guys had a few weeks ago and since then, mark has never stopped taking some time to help you learn the language little by little.

when the call with his mother ended, you grabbed the platter with the tea mugs, cake and cut up fruits and went to sit next to him on the couch.

“how’s your family?” you asked as you handed his tea mug over to him.

“thanks babe,” mark sat up straight and quickly took the cup from your hands, giving you a quick peck on the lips as a thank you before he answered your question. “they’re doing good, they’re on a vacation in gangwon right now.” he talked before taking a sip.

“really? it’s cold right now to be in a beach area,” you wondered, plopping a strawberry inside your mouth.

“exactly,” mark swallowed his cake bite, “their plan was to see the snow on the beach.” his eyes traveled up to give you an encouraging look, the words being something you knew the translation to them in korean.

you quickly understood your assignment. “해변에 눈 (haebyeon-ae noon),” you smiled as you answered confidently.

“good job, babe,” he scrunched his nose at you, following it by a bright smile. “let’s see if you can translate another word, how about that?”

“mark, this is supposed to be your rest day,” you laughed, leaning on his shoulder.

“i am resting,” he reassured, his hand reaching out to secure your head on his shoulder when you wanted to pull away from his body. this little action was enough to send your heart into a frenzy of heartbeats and butterflies.

“mmm,” mark hummed, the vibrations of his voice spreading throughout your body and making you feel at ease. “if you could tell me what we’re doing right now, in korean, i’ll reward you with something.”

“what would that be?” you asked, wittingly.

“the reward?”

you hummed as a yes.

“i’ll let you know when you give an answer, and it needs to be right.”

“mark,” you whined. “that’s unfair!”

“how would that be unfair babe,” mark laughed, his body rocking along yours. “i know you can do it, come on.”

“uhmm, right now we are…” you started thinking, the words coming inside your brain in english first. “drinking tea?”

“yes…in korean?” mark encouraged you to continue.

“지금…“

”ooooohhhhh,” mark reacted too quickly, rubbing your arm and tapping on it encouragingly, already being impressed by you translating one of the most basic words in korean. you were so proud and so happy that he easily made you feel so confident.

“차를 마셔요 (cha-reul masheoyeo)” you articulated slowly, still very much unsure of your translation skills.

“very good baby,” mark pecked your temple. “but what did we learn about actions that are currently happening in time? right now it’s like you said “we drink tea” but there’s a specific way to say “we’re drinking tea”, you remember?”

you hummed in question again. “마시고 있어요 (mashigo isseoyeo)?”

“very good job baby!” mark ruffled your hair and engulfed you in a big hug, pressing your face in his chest. he was very happy and excited that you got it right.

you were happy as well and you started giggling out of nowhere. “let’s do something else.”

“oooohhhh we’re confident now, are we?” he joked which made you slap his chest gently.

“you told me there was a reward, so i’m all in or nothing.”

“okay,” mark chuckled, scratching his chin. “how would you say that the weather is cold outside and you just wanna chill with your talented and handsome boyfriend?”

“that’s intermediate level mark, i’m still a beginner.”

“come on babe, i know you can do it.” he made you pull away from his chest and positioned you to be sitting in front of him on the couch. he stretched his legs in a way that you would be sitting between them before he wrapped them behind your back and pulled you closer to his body.

the heat raised to your ear at his swift movement and the proximity of his body made your heart beat like crazy. mark’s hands reached for your thighs and spread them so he could be positioned in the middle of them as well, before helping you wrap them around his waist.

inside your head, you just tried to control your breathing. your brain felt mushy, thoughts evaporating while your ears buzzed with exhilaration. your pupils dilated as you fixated mark’s face, your gaze zeroing on the mole on his face to avoid looking directly into his eyes.

“babe?” he tapped on your cheek and chuckled when he saw your flustered state. “you’re zoning out, there’s a reward remember?”

“yeah…yes! the reward,” you laughed nervously, wondering what the reward would be. you were already trembling and your heart was palpitating with mark’s face being so close to yours, you could feel his breath fanning over your skin.

“okay, let’s start with translating “the weather is cold outside” first, then we’ll go from there.” he guided you.

you nodded, clearing your throat. mark’s hands rubbed your knees, massaging all over the area to help you relax and concentrate but you were failing miserably as the only thing you could think of was how he was touching you.

you felt so bad ruining such a wholesome moment with your intrusive thoughts but you were just so in love with mark that every little touch still made you feel all giddy.

you bit your lip, inhaling deeply from your nose.

“don’t be nervous,” mark whispered, nodding his head to encourage you to speak.

“추워 (chuweo)…”

“come on babe, give me a full sentence.” he smiled but you just couldn’t get your brain to function properly, you could neither return the smile nor think of what to say. “what did we say about the weather? you learned this word not long ago.”

“i know it starts with an “N”…” you mumbled, your eyes looking everywhere.

“right!” he exclaimed, leaning in to give you a small kiss on the cheek. “here’s a small reward for remembering the start of the word.”

your heart was going to burst out of your chest at how kind and patient mark was with you. and you tried so hard to get the sentence right so you could see his proud smile blooming on his face again.

“날씨가 추워요 (nalssi-ga chuwoyeo)-“you stopped before he could react, “mark i don’t know how to say outside in korean,” you pouted, looking down at your fiddling fingers.

“it’s okay baby, you’re doing so good already.” he ruffled your hair again before noticing your fiddling fingers. he placed his palms on your hand in a calming manner. “in korean it’s okay to drop the word outside in a sentence, just saying the weather is cold (날씨가 추워요) is enough. but in case you want to use it in a sentence in the future, outside is 밖 (bakk). if you want to use it, you need to pair it with 에 (e) or 은 (eun), depends on the sentence.”

you listened carefully to his explanation, while playing with his fingers instead of fiddling with yours.

“so the full sentence would be 밖은 날씨가 추워요 (bakk-eun nalssoga chuwoyeo)?”

“exactly! good job baby,” mark clapped as he saw the relieved smile appear on your face. “now for the second part of the sentence.”

“what was it again? the second sentence?” you sheepishly asked, laughing nervously.

mark raised his eyebrow at you, a poor attempt at flirting with you and you laughed so hard at that. he started leaning closer to you, with his eyebrow still raised. you tried to stop him from getting closer by putting your hands on his shoulders, both of you laughing so hard at each other.

“mark what are you doing?” you asked through the fit of laughter that was going on between you. mark bit his lip, exaggerating his flirtatious action.

“maaaark,” you whined. “stop!” your stomach hurt from how hard you were laughing and he was laughing just as hard as you.

“okay okay,” he surrendered, raising his hands in defeat. “the sentence was “i just want to chill with my talented and handsome boyfriend” now come on.”

“is talented and handsome mandatory?” you laughed, rolling your eyes jokingly.

“of course! if you want to learn korean, you need to know the right words to compliment me with,” he tilted his head to the side, his long fringe draping over his round eyes, “or nah?” he whispered the last word, his voice going an octave deeper.

you cleared your throat. “right, of course, but i only know handsome in korean.”

“mmhm,” mark hummed, squinting his eyes. “that’s not bad already. you know what, skip talented, let’s leave it for a later session, how about that?”

you laughed at his attempts at flirting with you. he was just so cute and so effortlessly attractive with just acting boyish and love foolish. and you loved him just the way he was. you loved his nervousness and you loved the way he would stumble upon his own words sometimes. but most of all, you loved how he always made sure to show you how much he loved you and how much you meant to him. with his encouragement and kind words always warming your heart, you were certain that your heart was in good hands.

you loved him openly and without any restraints. never once being afraid of him breaking your heart. and you promised to be just as good with him as he was with you.

without realizing it, you leaned closer to his cheek where you placed a soft kiss on his skin. and he gave you a questioning look. “thank you for being patient with me mark.”

he smiled as a response. “of course babe.” he rubbed your hand with his thumb before nudging you to continue your assignment.

“okay, so… we said 밖은 날씨가 추워요, now we’re gonna say…잘 생긴 남자 친구와 (jalsaeng-in namjachingu-wa) chill…how do we say chill in korean?”

“just go with chill, that’s alright.” mark smiled.

“okay,” you nodded. “잘 생긴 남자 친구와 chill하고 싶어요 (jalsaeng-in namjachingu-wa chill-hago sipeoyo).”

“perfect!” mark smiled so bright, squeezing your cheeks between his palms until your lips pouted. “that’s my girl,” he whispered before leaning closer to you and kissing you softly on the lips.

your breath hitched inside your throat, and mark noticed it and tried to calm you down and help you get into the kiss by playing with the hair on your nape. he smiled into your lips when you started kissing him back, sneaking your hands around his waist. eagerly, mark brushed his hands down your back before clutching on your thighs and helping you sit on his lap, without breaking the kiss.

“you did so good today you deserve to be kissed until you lose your breath.” mark whispered, his soft breath numbing your puffy lips, making them feel tingly and itching for another kiss.

“is that my reward?” you breathlessly asked, wrapping your arms around his neck, your nose brushing over his.

“you don’t like it?” he looked up at you with hooded eyes. he looked worried, and you played with his neck to show him just how much you loved to be kissed by him.

“i love it!” you breathed out, finally crashing your lips on his, making him emit a low hum from his throat.

did someone say you prepared some cut up fruits for the both of you to enjoy on his rest day? those didn’t even compare to the plenty of kisses you guys were going to give each other.

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kyskaisen · 1 month

Text

reflections; maki x reader

:not evil

:master list

note: I swear my writing gets better </3

Thunder rolled through, filling the air with boom after boom with a storm coming in from the cold front shown on the weather forecast. Rain drops tattered against the window, racing down the glass in a vicious attempt to claim victory over the other droplets.

Naoya sat in a room with the head of the clan, discussing important business and not even drinking the tea that was prepared for him. He refused, he didn't like red tea, he liked green tea with a drop of honey, just like how you used to make it for him whenever he requested on days he felt simple. He rested his chin in his palm, keeping a bored expression on his face as the Head kept running his mouth, words going in one ear and out the other as Naoya was halfheartedly listening.

"By the way, when's that Hatake coming back? I still haven't heard news of that meek little girl being found dead yet."

"I don't know, I haven't thought about communication," Naoya answers bluntly before he spares a glance outside the small window in the room to get a look at the outside. It was certainly more interesting than the meeting between the two men.

The Head frowned, his already wrinkled forehead creasing as his eyebrows knit closer together and his nose crinkled. "Go find them, damnit. And tell them to hurry up."

Naoya sighed, pausing for a moment before getting up from his spot. He shuffled to the door, sliding it open and stepping out of the room. The open hallway showed the greenery outside which was getting rained on, it looked beautiful in his eyes, though he'd never admit it.

He rushed to his room, speeding past any other wandering clan members and servants. Sometimes he would glance at the people coming and going, and he'd see a small glimpse of you every time. It was safe to say he got a little attached, though if anyone pointed it out he would kill them.

Naoya looked around for something black, since it was almost dark out, and he couldn't just waltz onto campus, even when it's in the evening. There's barriers around the school, Gojo, and the principal. Sneaking in almost sounds impossible if there wasn't such a short staff. There's only so much a handful of sorcerers could do for such a large campus.

On said campus, you were busy in the cafeteria with your newfound friends and friend with benefits, celebrating your birthday.

"SHUSH! THEY'RE GONNA HEAR!" Gojo practically screeched to Toge and Panda who were making comments on what you and Maki might be doing while she led you to the cafeteria, blindfolded. You heard his echo through the hallway, and it already gave away what was going on, not that your birthday being marked and circled in red on the calendar in the training room wasn't enough. Everyone else was acting weird, or maybe special, since you weren't really used to all the affection yet. You knew it was your birthday, every year Naoya would make a comment on it then go about his business.

"You're loud enough!" Panda shot back before Gojo was ushering the other boys behind the corner of the cafeteria. Yours and Maki's footsteps echoed through the hallway as she was guiding you by your hand.

"Those idiots probably ruined the whole idea of a surprise party," Maki grumbles, rolling her eyes as the two of you got closer to the cafeteria. You hummed as you shrugged behind her, "I'll just pretend I had no idea."

"That'll be even worse, Gojo's just gonna get more excited," Maki chuckles as you two turn the corner, finally walking in and turning on the lights. She lifted the blindfold from your eyes, revealing a very over-decorated cafeteria with streamers covering all the walls and balloons around almost every table.

"SURPRISE!!"

"Happy birthday, Y/n!!"

You deadpanned your expression at the loud cheering in your ear. A large cake sat on one of the tables with candles on it, and if the candle wish thing did come true, it really would just be you and Maki right now. You walked over to the table, ignoring the others as you sat down, taking a fork and digging in all by yourself.

Everyone else looked at you like you're crazy, watching you eat away at the cake. Eventually you felt everyone's eyes boring holes into your head, so you turned around and found everyone staring.

"What? It's my cake anyways."

"You could at least share with your precious sensei?!"

"As much as I'd like to thank you for the cake, Gojo, it's still my first celebrated birthday, I get to eat the cake however I please," you remarked as you took another fork from the table. "Don't just stand there, Maki."

"WHAT?! How come she gets some?!"

"Because I didn't overreact like you guys did!"

"It's your birthday, of course we're gonna be excited!"

You rolled your eyes as Maki sat down next to you, taking the fork and eating away at your cake. "Damn, this is good," she comments with a smirk, taking another bite. "I got good taste."

"Wait, you picked it out?"

"Yeah, Gojo took me to the bakery and asked me to pick one out, so I went with the one I thought you might like best."

"Considerate," you chuckle, looking beyond the cake and at her with a glint in your eyes. She blushed a bit, grinning back at you as she took yet another bite.

"You're really getting into that cake, huh."

"It's really good. Now I kinda wish it was my birthday."

"Too bad," you grin a bit, shuffling in your spot. Outside the window, across the entire campus for that matter, Naoya had to pay close attention to where his feet went on the dirt. If he'd stepped on even one twig it would alert Gojo of his presence, and frankly he wasn't in the mood to deal with him.

Sneaking through the forest at Jujutsu Tech is not how he imagined spending his evening: careful not to step on a twig or brush against a bush, lightening his footsteps and not breathing so loud. If any one of the those things were to go sideways he risked getting caught, and his senses were at their highest, so he really was not hoping to fail.

When Naoya saw light eventually coming from the main building, which was a long walk away from the cafeteria where you were sitting, a weight left his shoulders and he began to relax a bit. He knew it was around 11 p.m, so he wouldn't have to wait long before the lights went out and he'd have to be on stealth mode again, turning off his channel of cursed energy temporarily just so he won't be noticed sneaking around looking for you.

When the lights did go out, he immediately hopped out from the bush he was hiding in and slowly opened the front door, sneaking in and looking around to see if anyone was still out. He almost bumped into the wall so many times because of how dark it was, but he couldn't exactly turn on a light unless he wanted to get himself caught.

He finally made it to the girls side of the dorms, hastily looking around for yours. People's names were in a plaster on the front of the door so looking for your special last name written in bold. There weren't very many since Jujutsu sorcerers are such a minority, so he didn't have to look for much until he was stuck between two doors. One of them, which had a light coming through the bottom crack of the room behind it, and another one, dark. His whole body warmed up as he ultimately went with the one where he would be least likely to get caught, and went with the latter option.

He carefully slid open the door, narrowing his eyes as he was immediately met with a pitch black. The only exception was the minuscule light coming from across the hall which wasn't even enough to form his own silhouette. He tiptoed into what he made out to be your room when he glanced at the bold name on the plaster, eyes zipping around for any sign of you now that he adjusted to the darkness. Nothing.

He heard voices coming from across the hall, and he quickly but quietly slid your door closed, hiding next to the dresser right next to your doorway as he waited for you to open it up again. When he does hear the door slide open with a crisp sound, he tenses, hearing your footsteps slowly pitter patter against the hardwood floor. His arm carefully reached around the dresser, flipping on the light switch and turning on the light.

You whipped around, almost screaming when you saw him standing there before he rushed over and pressed his hand against your mouth.

He took his hood off from his head and took off his mask, revealing hid all too familiar smug looking face that now looked a bit annoyed. He held up his finger to his mouth as he twitched his head back to suggest to whoever was across the hall.

"What're you doing here?!" you whisper yelled once he removed his hand, frowning as you scolded him. He rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically, looking around the messy room. "Naobito sent me, said he's getting impatient."

"That's just too damn bad, isn't it?" you remarked quietly, stepping away from Naoya and shutting your bathroom door. He pauses for a moment before lifting a brow, "What the hell does that mean?"

"You really think I give a shit if he's impatient? What's gonna happen again if I don't kill Maki? Execution? How's he gonna do that? I'm all the way up here and he's stuck being Head of the clan."

"You're hesitating?" he snarls, stepping closer with a frown. You scrunch up your face and lightly push him back a bit, "If I am?"

Naoya clicked his tongue as he looked around the room- at anything other than you. He tapped his foot angrily against the floor, causing a light clacking from the bottom of his shoe. "You know you're supposed to kill her and be done with it, right?"

"What happens if you find out I ditched it? What, you gonna snitch on me to Naobito about it?"

"I should!" He whispered, getting closer as his scowl worsened. His eyebrows were fiercely knit together and his nose was scrunched up and rippled, and his eyes were narrowed. You stared right back at him with a daring face, your own eyes narrowed as you pursed your lips.

"I should snitch to him," he echoed, huffing before scratching the back of his neck. You lift an eyebrow at him, emphasizing for him to continue.

"But I'm not going to." he sighed, stepping back a bit. Your lifted brow raised even higher at his behavior, because this is not how Naoya would normally act. The smug, annoying son of a bitch is the one who's going lie straight to the Head's face just to make sure nothing happens to you because that's just how much he really cares, not that he would do it for just anyone else. Naoya Zenin, the unlovable asshole, lying to protect you, his longtime servant. Now that's a surprise if you've ever seen one.

What the hell was he even doing? You and him both know he could get in trouble for it if the Head ever found out about the lying, yet Naoya's still here, telling you he won't snitch.

"Why?" you ask curtly, frowning as you bite the inside of your cheek. He looks at you with hooded eyes and a stern expression, his usually fixed hair now matted, casting a small shadow on his face. "You know why."

"No, I don't know why. Just tell me, stop making it so hard," you rush, folding your arms and tapping your foot impatiently against the ground. He sees how haste you're getting, by the sharp glint in your eye and your squared shoulders. He sighs again out of annoyance, pinching the bridge of his nose for a moment.

"Because I don't want to mess up your birthday," he lied after removing his hand from his nose. You gave him a look of disbelief, incredulity, as you scoffed. "You expect me to believe that? Since when did you care about my birthday?"

"I'm not evil," he glares at you, waiting for a moment for a response before he steps towards the door, placing a hand on it for a moment. You don't even spare him a quarter turn, and he can tell, he can't feel your hateful gaze boring holes into his skull. He huffs, his breath slightly hitching as he slowly slides open the door, being careful of the light that still seeps under the crack across the hall. He closes the door behind him, tiptoeing back down the hallway.

You stand there for a moment, in the middle of your own room, feeling out of place for what seemed to be for the rest of this perpetual hour. It hadn't even turned midnight, it was still your sweet sixteen and Naoya had to come and ruin it. You were used to things along the lines of that, like someone ruining your day of peace.

You shake your head, rolling your eyes as you do before deciding you didn't need to be in here, not after Naoya. So you decided to go across the hall, back to Maki's room where you'd just previously been.

You knock on her door gently, waiting for another moment before the door slides open. "Back already? I would've thought you're already getting tired of me."

"No," you reply bluntly, stepping past her and shuffling around her messy room, eventually plopping down on Maki's bed. Her gaze averted from the door to you, sliding it closed and strolling back over to you with a blank face. "So...whatcha doin' back here?"

"I didn't wanna be alone tonight," you confess, lying flat on your back, staring at the ceiling with your own hands intertwined on your chest. Your eyebrows knit, making a crease on your nose as you sit in silence. Maki's bed dips to your right as she got in next to you, lying flat on her back as well.

The two of you sat in silence, simply staring at the ceiling fan as it went round and round at a speed your eyes couldn't even keep up with. You thought it would make you dizzy enough to make you fall asleep, but it didn't work. Maki's presence lingers right next to you, just inches away from you, filling your senses to the brim.

"So you didn't wanna be alone, huh?" she repeats, eventually turning her head to face you after what seemed like 5 minutes of uncomfortable silence. You nod wordlessly, feeling your heart pound in your chest as you let out a deep exhale. Maki lifted a concerned brow as her eyes read your clearly stressed expression. "What's got you worked up?"

"I'm not worked up," you glance at her with rough eyes, catching a glimpse of Naoya right outside the window as he was starting to sneak off campus. Your breath almost gets stuck in your throat before Maki does the favor of breaking the silence. "That's a lie. Any blind man can see you're tense."

"I'm not," you grumble looking back up at the ceiling and pretending you never saw Naoya. Maki hummed incredulously, crossing her arms and turning on her side to face you. "I don't believe you. Tell me what's wrong."

"I don't care if you don't believe me, nothing's wrong."

"Y/n, no one just randomly comes into their friend with benefits' room at 11:30 at night just because they didn't wanna be alone."

"That's a valid reason."

"Not when you look like that."

"Rude," you mumble, turning on your side nonetheless to face her, resting your hands under her pillow. Maki lifted a brow when she saw you fully, letting out an exhale. "So, what's wrong?"

"I already told you, nothing's wrong," you frowned as you mumbled through your otherwise pursed lips. Her face remained unfazed, like she didn't even hear you as her lifted brow stayed raised.

"That's bullshit," she grunts, finally changing her expression and frowning to herself. Her sharp gaze looked like it was piercing right through your facade, and your mind conjured up the idea that she already knew Naoya had dropped a visit. Your jaw clenched on its own, your teeth gritting against the other row as you sat there, having an undeclared staring contest as the time passed, carefully listening to the raindrops tattering against the window.

She'll find out eventually, one way or another, you think to yourself as the staring contest doesn't falter. It'd been silent for so long that you were beginning to think you said that out loud.

"I'll tell you when I'm ready," you grumble, frowning even more as you scoot closer to her unexpectedly warm embrace. Maki's cheeks flush red as the blood rushes to them, feeling your arms wrap around her as you snuggle your face into her chest and your hands come around to play with her hair. "For now, just let me be."

Maki sighed, letting her chest rise and cave for a moment while her hands came up to cradle your head, laying in a fetal position. The fan spinning around in her room did nothing to help the heat in her cheeks, ears and neck, and it was only getting worse the longer the two of you stayed like that.

Eventually the silence was slowly lulling you to sleep out of comfort, and soon enough your eyes were drooping until you fell asleep in her chest. Maki's eyes glanced over at the clock behind you which read 1:01 in the morning, and she almost scoffed at herself until she listened to your even breathing, and then she realized you'd fallen asleep. She sighs quietly before gently reaching across to turn off her lamp and finally let herself fall asleep.

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