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nightfall-1409 · 8 months

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sometimes i do in fact just balk at how ppl engage with and around discussions of disability and ableism.

Like ofc, being mindful of language is a nice thing and we should all strive to be nicer but if thats where your advocacy ends thats not great and further, imo esp amongst the disabled people I know just leads to non disabled individuals policing the jokes disabled people make.

implying that disabled characters 'should be' depicted as inferior to their nondisabled counterparts. That's ableism, Textbook ableism according to the APA. Discussions abt how the suffering of disabled characters should be always be central in narratives about them. That's ableism. (especially when its portrayed something that can be overcome.)

condoning disgust and shock responses to physical disabilities as "they're just thinking about themselves and thinking about what if what happened to you happened to them or someone they love". Is so ableist that I still cannot believe that I had to read it

The framing of disability as tragedy or something to be horrified at. Even if you think that saying "Well they're not disgusted by you they're disgusted thinking about if it happened to them" makes it better. It really doesn't, I think it makes it worse. "Well you're already disabled so who gives a shit. What if I, a normal person had that happen to me?" type vibes.

The consistent use of the medical model with characters with disability, where disability is something to be cured or corrected, with a mind to making a character "more normal" (i've also seen this phrased as "make them more human" which is particularly disgusting on top of deeply fucking ableist). This is also a highlight of the APA's discussion around ableism.

And to be clear: I don't go out of my way to yell at people when I see this stuff and I don't think others should either. I don't think that's helpful or productive. I take note of it, sure, especially if I've seen them make shitty comments before, and I might bitch about it out of context to fellow disabled friends, but I don't want to endorse callout culture or posting, it's unkind and imo most people don't want to perpetrate these sorts of attitudes, they're simply societal norms that they've never questioned, and I don't want trying to correct this issue to spiral into accusations of people being awful and spiking off defensiveness.

From Leah Smith's Article on Ableism on the Center for Disability Rights' website

Just like most forms of discrimination, ableism often shows its ugly face from nondisabled people with good intentions. Unfortunately, good intentions never solved any problems. So let’s put our good intentions aside and get to the root of what’s really going on. I believe much of ableism rests on the medical model of disability, in that we have first come to understand disability through the lens of a doctor- something is ‘wrong’ with this person and that ‘something’ needs to be fixed. This is how we are taught to think about disability. However, where we have interpreted the word “wrong” is where we have gone wrong. Just because something is different, does not mean it is bad. We live in a culture in which we have entire television series’ on the medical complications of different types of disabilities. [...] The best way to de-root ableism in our everyday lives, is to ensure that there’s always a seat at the table for those who are like you and those who are not, but also checking ourselves on how we treat people with disabilities once they are at the table. As simple as this sounds, de-rooting ableism is often as simple as just treating disabled people like you would anyone else.

And from NPR's "How to Talk About Disability and Avoid Ableist Tropes"

"Many disabled people subscribe to the social model of disability, which sees disability as the result of the interaction between people living with disabilities and an environment filled with physical, attitudinal, communication and social barriers. While it doesn't deny the reality that comes with living with a disability or the impact it has on an individual, it emphasizes the need for social change in order to accommodate disabled people." "The social model says that a disability is not my inherent problem and that something isn't inherently wrong with me as a person. I think it's more of the community aspect and how you can have diversity in your culture, versus the medical [model] of, like, you have to be fixed, you have to blend in with the norm and this is how we're going to do that to fix you," said McDonnell-Horita. The disability pride movement stemmed from the social model of disability, as it frames disability as a cultural identity and a natural part of human diversity. Disabled people have used pride to affirm the self-worth and agency of disabled individuals and as a tool for combating systemic ableism.

I've got faith that this doesn't have to be the way things remain. I do.

#nightfall chats #if you recognize something i discussed here i expect you to behave yourselves and not be mean to people #Bc im not trying to be Mean to individuals or go after anyone. that's not what i want thats not my point #bc come the fuck on i don't want to keep seeing this stuff

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antidisneyinc · 2 years

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Hi, I've been reading through your blog and I really love your posts and criticism about popular movies and the sarcastic and hilarious way you say what you're thinking. I was wondering if you had any books/articles you really liked that you could recommend about pop culture/movies/Disney/anything really? If you don't want to answer this or it's too long that's okay, I totally understand!

THANK YOU for your devoted patronage, yours shall be the first body I fling against the mouse's barricades in the war to come

my main concern re pop media atm is just how much corporations and government have co-opted both art and entertainment (near completely). aka we don't even have the dystopian leisure of escapism because the things artificially chosen to be massively popular are all a conflation of greed and propaganda scientifically designed to strangle minds and the culture they inhabit and it's so thoroughly extensively evil i can't think about it and breathe at the same time

and the sad thing about your curiosity and my crusade is that journalism, including film journalism, is ALSO rapidly dying to corporate interests and it's increasingly difficult to find film writers willing to mudrake and connect any dots about the powers at be that bankroll their employers. hell it's difficult to find publications that aren't straight up hype machines whose content is entirely advertisement for surefire mainstream hits (see the trillion articles about batman before the movie has even dropped)

so sorry for being totally unhelpful but my honest recommendation would be to look for whichever writers/op-eds/primary sources (industry ppl)/video essayists are speaking w/ citations who don't have an ulterior personal/financial motive to be doing so (i.e. Sideways on youtube has some interesting and probably correct insight to the music side of hollywood productions but what targets he attacks are always the easy ones and he has obvious incentive to draw viewers but not make too many people mad)

would love some reading recs myself tbh!

#long post #way too long #film #film industry #hollywood

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palmett-hoes · 3 years

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7 for Andrew??

( ask game )

7. Exists as a pretext for the intellectual exercise of seeing how much textual support I can find for something patently absurd

okay well this isn't patently absurd it's actually a very sad and sadly very common story for a lot of kids, but i did spend a lot of time combing the books for evidence of andrew’s relationship with books and reading. him being a big reader is a super common headcanon in the fandom, and im sorry to tell yall that we pulled that one out of our asses. from what’s available in canon andrew hates reading and refuses to do it in front of other people. so, i concluded that andrew is in fact, dyslexic, and that reading is difficult and frustrating for him. he avoids it whenever possible, instead relying on audible information that seems to work best for his memory. it also tracks that he wouldn’t read around other people because it would be displaying weakness in his eyes for people to see him struggling

so, the evidence. i’ve searched the books by appearances of words like “book” “read” “paper” etc. most things i can think are related to reading yknow? and there’s not one instance in the entire trilogy of andrew reading anything, ever. in fact, he canonically hates libraries and refuses to go in them. one time he’s handed a packet of an opposing team’s stats and he crumples it up and throws it in his locker immediately.

to put it in perspective, most if not every other characters is shown reading at some point or another, it’s just in very short, missable scenic descriptors. aaron buying a book in the airport. kevin reading a magazine in the dorm. the upperclassmen hanging out and doing homework together. neil reading foreign news sites. it doesn’t seem like much but the fact that andrew is never actually seen reading anything at any point ever,, is actually somewhat conspicuous if you pay attention to the fact that well,, everyone else does.

there’s a handful of other details, mostly andrew’s phone. he has an older model that both essentially forces him to use it slower to type, as well as disincentivizes other ppl from texting him and expecting a quick response. he doesn’t text neil at any point except for the essentials of setting up the phone, and it doesn’t seem like he texts with anyone else either. he specifically tells neil to call him, not text.

so let’s backtrack. let’s talk about what it means for andrew to be dyslexic.

(um,, a lot of this is gonna be based on articles and studies i’ve read but i don’t really wanna make this an Essay i want to cut through the explanations and background info so i’m gonna be making some Statements. if you’re curious or confused pls send me a message and i’ll tell u what i had in mind/what i was drawing from)

thematically, when thinking about andrew’s background, the most important thing i keep in mind about andrew is that he has never been lucky, ever. he is consistently, over and over, handed the worst cards. he is born and raised in the foster care system, and even within this (basically inherently traumatic system) he is ONLY placed in bad homes. he says so. maybe they vary in their methodology, but they’re all bad. so then i have to extend this reasoning to the other parts of his life. he has bad teachers, bad foster siblings, bad case workers. no one CARES about this boy, no one looks at him, no one asks why he behaves the way he does. he gets written off, over and over and over again, in every part of his life. that is FUNDAMENTAL to who he is and what has shaped his views and personality as a person

growing up, no one helped him with his homework, no one read to him at night. probably he had very limited experience with books before he entered school. if andrew is dyslexic he would have struggled in school from very early on, and he would not be receiving any help or support at home. he never learned any skills or coping mechanisms for dealing with the fact that he mixes up his letters or that his head hurts when he looks at them too long, because no one is paying attention to him to notice these things. if he’d received help, if people had been patient with him, he probably could have learned to read just fine and could have done well in school with some accommodations. instead, he just learned to resent reading, to hate books, because people were always trying to force him into it the wrong way, when he was a square peg in a round hole and he needed to approach reading differently from the other kids. but no one saw that there was a problem that could be helped, they only saw HIM as a problem, so no one helped him. not his foster parents, not his foster siblings, not his teachers. so he has no positive associations with reading, it’s just a continuous negative in his life

his teachers especially saw his outbursts and his resistance in class. they didn’t see that he was an abused, traumatized (autistic) child with a learning disability who couldn’t convey to anyone that reading was frustrating and physically painful for him, that he only needed a little more time and a little more support. they only saw his “attitude” and the fact that he took longer than his classmates. so they labelled him a “bad” kid, a “stupid” kid, and they didn’t question that judgement further

no one saw that, if he was given that extra time to read and think at his own pace, that he was brilliant. that he remembered everything that was ever said to him, word for word. they didn’t notice his self-discipline. his skill at puzzles and mind-games. the way he could see right through people and predict with uncanny accuracy how they would act and react. how good he was at putting clues together. his incredible spatial reasoning. they didn’t start conversations with him long enough to realize that he was incisive and observant and clever. they didn’t notice that he was bright and inquisitive, if reserved. that because no one ever answered his questions he learned how to answer them himself. that he started trouble because he was bored and under-stimulated. all they knew was that he never finished his tests and that he couldn’t read aloud in class because everything in schools is levels and data and test scores and working under ridiculous time requirements.

so i don’t really like that common characterization of andrew as a bookworm who does well in school. we know that andrew is intelligent, it’s so obvious that he’s brilliant to us from reading the books, but that’s because we’re seeing him through neil’s eyes. neil who looks at and understands andrew more than anyone else ever has, who sees in him the things that other people miss. and that’s important, because people have missed the fact that andrew is smart. but reading books, getting good grades, eloquent essays, that’s all one of the most typical, the most universally recognized ways to be smart. and i think that’s an injustice for andrew as a character and what his story represents, because he represents all the kids that got missed and passed over and thrown aside for not operating “correctly,” for reacting to things the “wrong” way

there are so many ways to be smart, so many different kinds of intelligence that get dismissed and written off for not being successful in the very narrow set of skills the school system teaches. giving andrew the most classic and conformative and universally recognized signs of “being smart” (actively AGAINST his passive characterization in canon) is honestly a disservice to him. and that’s what i like about him being dyslexic, of him struggling in school, because he can still be smart, be BRILLIANT (because he IS brilliant) but in non-conventional ways

#txt #andrew minyard #my posts #im talkin #anon #anonymous #ask #ask game #cw ableism #dyslexic andrew minyard

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tsauergrass · 3 years

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TOP 5 Of 2020

I was tagged by @tackytigerfic @amortentiaboys and @cibeewastaken, thank you lovelies <3

1. Lemon Blossoms 🍋

Personally I really like the atmosphere of this fic, it’s wintery and warm and very lemon-y? I like the way the story flows, the way scenes and time change without breaks or feeling choppy, like it’s all one river. And I remember writing this fic, sitting on my bed and having no idea at all how to start, and I was for some reason obsessed with lemons at the time so I just started. Writing lemons. And the rest of the story came, just like that. It was so different from what I imagined or mentally jotted down notes and outlined for this fic, it’s like I just tossed all that away (haha) but the end result is so unexpected and so perfect for the story, I realized it was the one I wanted to tell all along. A lot of ppl also left comments saying they crave something lemon-y after reading this, which I consider a success haha

2. To the Rhythm of the Waves

I saw a text post once saying how when you’re trying to write, your brain doesn’t give you a story, instead it just. Gives you an aesthetic, an atmosphere and chucks it at you and tells you to work with it!! (The post said it much funnier than I did, gosh I loved that post.) But the point is, that’s like my brain 99% of the time. And I don’t think I’ve ever really, really centered a story around conveying an aesthetic/atmosphere until this fic. There is, like, minimal plot, but I think what I wanted to create was there: a very soft, faint, tender sweetness. It’s about finding homes and living very simply but happily. In the process of writing it there was a lot of feeling around, trying to find the road this story is leading, trying to find the pieces that would build up this atmosphere, but a lot of it came from within, like from a single place? So the story feels whole, I think. And I’ve gone back to reread it a couple times, but every time I get something different out, so. Haha

3. This drabble

This was super short but I loved it. I had to have typed it out within fifteen or twenty minutes and it just feels right. I liked the Draco in that drabble, and I liked the brief glimpse of perhaps a late evening in a dark room, and I liked the idea of their names. I liked that Harry was so indulgent when Draco was all panicky and hard on himself, when he didn’t expect kindness and softness but Harry gave it to him anyway, because it’s Harry. Because adoration, because love. Just a tiny piece I played with and I liked the result

4. In Your Voice

I don’t know if anyone could tell but I wrote this with so much yearning, like, god. Quarantine was first getting to me at that time, I think. And I remember reading about this article then that talked about the death of landlines (!!) in literature (which was super interesting!), and seeing that idea of having a piece of someone, but not the whole of them. You have their voice, but not their solid presence. They are here, but at the same time they’re not. Having a companion partially, not so completely, which comforts some part of you but makes other parts lonelier. I just liked the idea that Draco and Harry only have each other’s voice, I tried to convey that through their phone call, that it’s the only thing they have of each other. And it’s enough, but at the same time it’s not enough. They want so much more, but they can’t get it. That physical restraint brings out emotional chaos, I think. Looking back now I’m a bit embarrassed about the part where Harry says he misses Draco, it’s kind of cheesy haha. But overall I liked it. I also received a lot of comments saying this feels like home, this feels like longing, a lot of people relating to this and hopefully this brought them comfort, which I am really glad about.

5. Prompt: I love you - Over a cup of tea

This is one where I didn’t expect it to have as many notes, but it did, and I tried to think about why, so I read it and reread it, and I think in that process I came to like it. It’s a small piece that delineates Draco’s journey to learn to say I love you through cups of tea. I tried to put in the story the idea that even though at the beginning Draco can’t say the words, and he feels lacking and guilty about it, he does say i love you—through actions, through small gestures. It was the language he spoke. And I like to think that the reason why Harry was so patient and understanding was because he understood that. He knew how Draco spoke his heart, and he accepted it. And he didn’t, like, wait for Draco to say I love you; that acceptance wasn’t a means to an end. Instead he embraces and loves who Draco is, and when Draco says the words they’re more like an unexpected surprise that made him really happy, because it means Draco feels safe around him now, it means Draco feels secure enough about what they share that he is willing to bear his heart out like that. Just, subtle languages, man.

(May I also take this chance to rec Cibee’s wonderful drabble responding to the same prompt, which is the prettiest thing I have ever read in this world!!!)

Honorable Mentions (because why not!!)

. Colour Me Blue

This isn’t HP but I really liked it. Check it out if you’re also in All For The Game and ship andriel! It’s a story about enamel pins and very, very subtle promises, I liked the atmosphere I created

. Prompt: I love you - Muffled, from the other side of the door

This didn’t get as many notes but I was proud of it. I liked the way I threaded the flashbacks to the present. I wonder whether I would do it differently if I have the chance to rewrite it, but I like it now.

. To The End Of The World And Back

Listen, I just imagine Draco, heartbroken and tired and nervous and aching, walking around the gallery, almost mindless and suddenly—the huge photograph of him appears in front of him, taking up the entire wall, and it’s called Home. Like, jesus. I can’t draw but if I could I want to create this scene

And that’s it! Thank you if you made it here lol, it grew so long. It’s 2021 already and I know loads of people have already been tagged, so if you want to do it and you saw this consider yourself tagged!

I also just want to take the chance to thank so many amazing ppl who made this year better. Thank you to everyone who has ever read, liked, commented, reblogged my fic, or just enjoyed it and savored it themselves—you really made my year so much better, and I hope the coming year will be kind to all of us🥂

#tagged #top 5 of 2020 #my fic

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pestopascal · 3 years

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While I will absolutely agree that CB2077 isn’t the ONLY game doing all this bullshit, or that other AAA studios don’t deserve the flack CDPR is getting, I have to say that this is absolutely the perfect storm and I think people are FINALLY seeing the problems in modern AAA gaming. CB2077 might be fun to play, may have a good story, but it’s almost impossible to see because of the glaring issues. Which, honestly, is a good thing. I hope games change after this.

under here

AAA studios have been like this and this sort of release has been completely normalised on all accounts by both the businesses themselves and fans because of the inherent reliance on modders (bethesda at the forefront of this), as well as the pushback every time companies actually go ‘uh we need a lil more time’ (although... they just shouldnt announce potential release dates, im even of the camp they shouldnt even start releasing the game until like 6 months out from their official date because they fuck it up every time. borderlands 3 being the only game i know of being in “secret” development and then announcing itself in march for a september release. game itself aside, thats how companies should do it). easily i can remember a lot of 2011 release games which have had the exact same issues as cp77′s release, and then every other game in between since. very rarely do you actually have a game that isn’t a fucked up mess of a pile of pixels. and it is always the customisable character ones that are honestly, genuinely, ugly looking at release. but you can definitely say its been happening looooooong before 2011, with unrealistic expectations, word limits, 11 month time frames, offloading sequels to smaller companies so they can suffer if it fails, etc etc. the entire system has been like this for so long... they dont know any real different nowadays.

i mean look. tlou2 released under crunch conditions this year, and was rewarded. it was ALL over the social media feeds, it was quite the controversy because, surprise surprise, the company promised they wouldnt do it uwu and then. bam ! crunch conditions. literally around that time too, bioware employees came out with a statement saying ‘man we wish dai FAILED so that back in 2014 we couldve proven crunch was a wrong practice’. they say this as well after having to produce da2 in 14 months, which just suffered from fans and journalism for reusing environments, because it was produced in 14 months, and honestly? no one pointed that out back then, bioware themselves pointed it out again this year, 6 years after release, that that game was produced in 14 months. rdr2′s release was hounded by stories of crunch, and they all disappeared into the night because... it was heralded as the best game of all time. that was 2018, 2 years ago.

i think too is that some people get kind of ... morally and ethically concerned. which is understandable. can you consume something when you know it was made under conditions like crunch? and i think one of the most confronting things about it is that 9/10, not only has your favourite company engaged in crunch conditions, they almost actively choose to continue with them. and then that’s a whole other bag of issues blown up over there when it comes to what is able to be consumed what isn’t etc etc

i think also like a mix of marketing, promises and then the expectations of what the game will be like have really had cdpr earn the ire of fans which is just like... you don’t believe what these companies are saying. you never should, esp when it’s their ceo’s saying it who don’t work on the actual floor. bioware itself is the main culprit of doing this to the point they finally came around with all the da4 concept art and teasing to be like ‘ummm but actually dont get invested?’. remember all that qunari lady fanart that bioware management was like ... please dont get attached? yeah. yeah. like at what point as well is there going to be heavy level of apprehension to approach this? and i can’t really talk either, i cracked open the door for mass effect again. i know exactly what kind of shit bioware will pull, i know they are teasing it already on social media, but mass effect is my ride or die series. that’s why people keep opening the door on letting these companies get away with it. and you can’t fault fans entirely either because this is down to a science of how to get money. i mean, fuck, mass effect andromeda’s entire advertising campaign HINGED on the n7 logo. for the nostalgia value. and i see text posts in the same vein of both ‘guys, disney isnt gonna fuck you if you consume every remake for nostalgia value’ and ‘its understandable why people do it’.

so then you have to go ‘well are fans as just to blame’ and then that’s a whole other argument.

i think also like. i personally havent run into aaaannnyyyyyyy of the issues that you see posted online. which is ironic bc 1) i play on ps4 and 2) its an old dusty ps4. in fact a lot of ppl i have spoken to who have had issues have played on pc. does this mean the glitches dont exist? ofc not, the vids and screenshots are right there. but like... ive had a basically unhindered experience so far, and i get where ppl are coming from (i do, i promise) where theyve basically found the game unplayable. is there also a standard of what ppl consider unplayable because ive played most AAA games at launch when they basically rushed to slap the box label on the game and called it a day until they work on patches. when ppl consider unplayable is also just... different per person. some people have a slight blur on the screen when turning too fast even in an MMO and decide the game is horrible and unplayable. some people can have broken quests and npcs not loading and falling through maps and still be fine. there’s no agreed statement of what makes a game unplayable either, which is why you read threads on twitter and someone goes ‘yeah this npc t-posed so i quit in the first hour’ with a dozen replies. everyone has different levels of it.

it’s a mixed bag of issues. im not excusing cdpr, but the ppl who worked on the game are honestly likely not the ones who pushed for a release. you’ve gotta look at sony and microsoft and ceo’s with bonuses coming up and the investors and shareholders and people who sit behind computers and read numbers detailing interest and demand and supply and how every single time they had to delay this game, the loudest (but smallest) bunch of assholes on like reddit and in the twitter threads complained that it was delayed AGAIN even though back in what 2015? they said it’ll come out when it’s ready. and yeah there are times when game delays result in a mismatched half assed sort of story (kh3... p5... ffxv... dai...) and then there are times when, if they need to delay the game... they probably need to delay the game. sometimes delays are bad sometimes theyre good sometimes you are sitting there like whew if you only didn’t try to be like THIS TIME this is the release date.

the ONLY WAY this will stop happening is, quite frankly, unionising. and everyone is allergic to that whole concept so like... this is “the perfect storm” as you put it. but it’s also not. people have been so disappointed over the last 2 years alone for gaming companies, the final product, the attitudes from higher ups, that i think cdpr is receiving a good few years worth of anger. i think theyre also on the receiving end of misdirection from american fans who still don’t fucking get the company isn’t american, because that’s another bag of issues as well. like we’re holding at least 8 bags of groceries out of the back of the car now, and we don’t want to take another trip, because there are so many little bits of this entire situation to look at. there’s so much back and forth.

i think the worst, but most realistic thing is: games won’t change. how they will social media wise will. maybe. assuming bioware gets their heads out their asses but... they’re going to be a lot more careful. i mean, hell, sony offered refunds. that was just a publicity stint. they dont give a fuck if the game was bad. as i said before, if they did, they would make all companies fix trophy problems, starting from like 2010 or whenever the trophy system first came out. they just don’t wanna fall in alongside cdpr being thrown on its sword. but the companies are gonna learn from this, get smarter, still do the same shit to their employees, still pay off journalists, still do media blackouts, etc etc. and we’re gonna be here in another year’s time, with another game, having these same roundabout arguments, and cp77′s issues are gonna fade into just a wikipedia article.

#replies #this got long so i threw it under a cut #i just like wrote as i was thinking too in between ovw sry lol #Anonymous

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terriblygrimm · 3 years

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ohmygod finally someone who shares my views. my sister and I loved fatws for what they did w sam’s character but aside from that the writing was very bad. we really could not understand wtf was bucky’s purpose to the main plot and what new side of bucky did we see. when the action wasnt happening he kept whining about steve and being rude to sam and then marvel thrust sambucky onto us and basically told us to move onto this Brand New Duo. sam and bucky were not on equal footing here and their personal struggles did not hold equal weight at all (i will give credits to anthony and seb here for making their friendship look believable) mcu keeps sidelining bucky and i thought they would do him some justice in this show but they didnt. after reading the articles and interviews post the show it was evident the writers did not understand bucky’s character at all. his whole character development was moving on from steve and now becoming sam’s sidekick? (also im really hoping and praying these writers dont go through with sarahbucky in the future because…no..absolutely not). and i do hope that what you said about a future steve bucky reunion comes true because so far mcu has been very hellbent on erasing their friendship and its just pathetic that they try to undermine their friendship so much, while weirdly enough also emphasizing that yes it has deep emotional value.

yeah like, i’m gonna try to make this as succinct and short (lol) as i possibly can without going off on tangents but tf.atws should’ve been SAM’S show. sam alone. he should’ve been the only title character, and they could’ve properly focused on his arc and the sociopolitical weight of it. that is MORE than enough content to fill up 6 hours. i absolutely love cap!sam and i think he’s gonna be a great captain america. i’m very much looking forward to his future.

but virtually everything else about this show from conception to film was a miss.

the flag smashers? (really marvel? your military propaganda perked its ugly ass head with this one. within the first five minutes of the show they were condemning ppl who believed in a world without borders lmfao. i legit almost stopped watching right then i’m not kidding) and the storyline itself wasn’t even coherent. they had WAY too many characters and arcs to focus on and it just.. didn’t work. didn’t do any one of them justice. not even their title characters - especially their title characers. the whole thing felt very hollow and emotionally remiss. the barely existent dialogue was clunky and awkward, and i’m sorry but.. to me, sam and bucky do not organically get along lol. the chemistry between the actors is undeniable which is why so many ppl ate it up, (and do i think they could eventually get along? yes) but the buddybuddy thing was pretty forced imo. very sudden and based on very little.

their stories were at odds, with not one common goal between them all the way to the end. they fought for screen time and it caused both of their stories to suffer and not carry the weight they should have. they both had VERY heavy content to work with (a black captain america / a trauma/abuse/pow survivor) but somehow marvel - in true marvel fashion - did not commit to either and tried to tread lightly on both.

bucky and sam only had the thin thread of steve woven between them & even that was done poorly because the writers themselves admittedly weren’t told what happened to steve, therefore they couldn’t write a definitive arc about it. and instead of actually committing to the deep bond between he and bucky, they took the no homo route and had bucky express anger over who holds property of the shield, rather than admitting it was steve himself that he emotionally and physically missed. but again, they couldn’t really do that, could they? they didn’t know if steve was alive or if bucky knew of his whereabouts.

i’ll admit i did enjoy the peripheral concept of bucky helping steve pass along the shield, like he was its watcher, making sure steve’s legacy fell in good hands, and was there to basically coach sam along the way. in THAT regard alone, it did feel like he and steve were still a team post-endgame. that, on top of saying that he and steve discussed the future of the shield together was a sweet touch. loved that, but it was executed poorly like everything else.

& his winter soldier arc... lordy, was that handled horribly. bucky is a charming, gentle, burdened, lover-not-a-fighter (since the 40s) victim and they turned him macho, carrying the burden of his abusers and guilted into making amends? and that his problems were his fault because he couldn’t trust people? say what now? bucky is a pissed off, good-hearted war vet with a LOT of baggage- he’s not just some dude. the effort to butch up and patch up bucky in a quick fix was apparent, from the short hair, to the list of names, to the “man up” approach everybody came at him with, to the really out of place heterosexual flirting. i mean honest to god who the has time to flirt? apparently bucky! none of the other characters even passed a sideways glance to another during the entire series aside from the one character who audiences have been vocal about being queer for 10 years. hmmm.... (and then the writers actually CAME OUT & MADE A POINT TO SAY that they did not intend for his bisexuality lmfao i mean please dear god put us out of this misery. that writer/director need to stop talking because nobody cares about their personal opinions or headcanons. media is for the viewer to interpret so please shut up.)

overall the actors did what they could w that script, that much was obvious- and they certainly tried to stay as true to their visions/versions of the characters as they could but it just didn’t end up matching up.

but yeah, on a lighter note, i sincerely don’t think they’ll continue bucky in sam’s sphere. i think that was a one off. i don’t think they actually wanted to sell them as a “new partnership” but they just didn’t know how to write the dynamic properly. i think tf.atws was just a sad, sad attempt to place them somewhere post-endgame so they can continue on in bigger marvel films. sam’s got his cap4 and his new team (torres, sharon, walker), and i think i read he’s gonna make an appearance in black panther? which will be sooooo awesome!!

and bucky? his ending was very open, what with him miraculously “feeling better” yet not quite the white wolf, and not permanent in any place. and on top of that, he was instructed to stay away from wakanda so he can’t make future appearances there, so methinks he and steve will cross paths again as nomad and white wolf for sure (once it’s revealed what steve’s been doing, etc). maybe in space?

the power that holds anon.... i get so excited even thinking about it.

#ask #anon #i always enjoy commiserating w others 😂#but truly aside from how bad tf.atws was i think both sam and bucky are onto bigger and better things #i just think it was a really awkward placeholder / the development they needed to push so they can serve other future purposes

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andysnorwayaffairs · 5 years

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Final Project

Pt 1; a perfect ending. feeling a rush of shared excitement - finally! just like me!

warmth, embraced, a queer kind of friendship. we sat in the grass and talked about how our lives were growing up, how our queerness was realized and how it affected the way we walk in the world. our stories are so similar yet so, so different. miles and miles of time away, you announce to your friends that you’re probably maybe gay. you start a spark in their minds, and soon after you’re deemed the trail blazer of coming out. you are brave, do you know it? you were the person who i wished for. so desperate for approval from others, and not meeting anyone like you, i took it upon myself to starve my queerness, the differentness, the part of me that i knew i could definitely be hated for. and i can’t stand the thought of being hated. and a part of me hated myself for who i was. i was taught that i couldn’t love like that, that it wasn’t *real*, that anything other than normal is impossible, wrong, destructive. so i listened, and i believed them. not completely, that is also true. that’s why i never stopped immersing myself in online queer culture, why i desperately searched for any sign of queerness in the online personas i followed and in the fiction that i read. we talked about this too, how we’d entrench ourselves in media and later realize that we were part of the group we were so obsessed with. finally... just like me

you opened your heart so quickly - your friends, they tell me that they’re so happy that you’ve met me. you open a window into your life and lend a hand to help me hop in. i see how you love others, and how they love you. we run through the lawn of a backyard riddled with ripe fruit and laugh like children at how sweet the juice is. we share a meal and spend hours talking about nothing and everything. i sometimes stop and listen to the chatter, and i feel complete warmth even when i cannot understand what is being said. we read the cards i brought and i learn how each of you sees love. i see the way you interact with your loved ones, the way you so deeply care to spend time with them. letting go, giggling in giddy joy, acting like absolute fools. finally, just like me

cried a farewell last night

thank you for offering me a bizarre, unfair amount of kindness

thank you for showing me a glimpse of your life, your entire world

thank you for extending a hand in friendship, in solidarity

thank you for being my friend

I feel like my time here, my glimpse into another person’s life, feels like a glimpse into an alternate timeline. A timeline in which I accepted myself from the beginning. A timeline in which I told a friend about my crush on Jen from Buzzfeed. A timeline when I refused to normalize myself, refused to uphold the boundaries that were unfairly placed on me. A timeline when I was brave. A timeline when I stopped being so damn scared. A timeline when I realized that my friends would still stay friends with me, and those who didn’t want to, I should let go of anyways. There will always be people who don’t match up with your values, your energies, your being. I won’t lie to myself and say that it wouldn’t hurt like a bitch, but it’s a hard fact of life that homophobes, transphobes, racists, xenophobes, ie bigots exist and there will be always be bullies and people who don’t care about you, who WANT to put you down, who want to hurt you. In a world of power, there will be those with some and those without. I was given a small window into my friend’s life and saw a life pathway built around friendships who learn and grow right alongside you. I’ve always thought about that – what if? What if I let go earlier? In my timeline, the forces around me were not as kind to me. I was told queerness was ugly, so utterly upside down. I didn’t have anyone to tell me otherwise. Perhaps if I had a positive role model to tell me that it WAS okay, that it was beautiful and wonderful. Perhaps if I had a friend like them in my life who was the first to come out and encouraged others by simply living their life the way THEY want to, perhaps I would have had the courage to do so earlier. I can’t change the past.

But I can think about how the events of my past shaped my present, and how my present shapes my future. Thank God - I DID let go! There’s no race to live your truth, but oh god it feels so good to do it NOW. I’m so thankful that I found the bravery these people I know now have embraced so many years ago. I feel like my own person, like an entire human soul. I don’t feel the need to please anyone. This queer experience, of finding yourself and maybe even fearing yourself, but, ultimately, coming to love yourself despite dominant society failing you, that is a queer experience. Regardless of any experience, something we all share is having to live in a world that ultimately does not accept us, does not want us.

An ode to knowing that although things are different here, and that there’s no possible way that I could have had a similar timeline just simply because of how different our spheres and worlds are... despite this, despite the fear and self hate and internal violence I was forced into because of the life I was born into, despite all of this, I was still able to find myself and love myself and find others who love me for my whole humanness.

There’s a lot of work to be done in the world, for our lives and our safety and our happiness. I think the friends I’ve met here are doing that work. Through their love for each other and thus their refusal to conform, to stay quiet, to accept the norms in place.

Meeting this special friend may have been completely chance, but I believe fate had a little bit to do with it too. To give me this window, to let me see what beauty it is to allow a person to be themselves. The sooner, the better.

____ DISCUSSION

Pt 3:

It’s funny to see how these ppl’s reflections of their lives fit in line with exactly what we discussed through our readings and class discussions. Norway may be progressive in law, but not necessarily in practice. Each of the queer people I asked this about, or asked them to speak about their queer experience, expressed frustration at there not being much of a strong queer community here, and how they still experienced everyday oppression (you may call these micro aggressions).

Nordic model of inclusion + welfare, making this a space where it is looked down upon to discriminate for someone’s sexuality

A different relationship to Christianity

In the U.S., I grew up in a heavily queerphobic, heavily strict and monitored environment where I was even monitoring myself, reprimanding myself for all of the gay content I was consuming but allowing myself to keep doing it because I was “outside” of the community and thus could not be associated with it or have to think of the consequences.

In middle school I was fully aware that I had strong crushes on gay female celebrities but was petrified of sharing that information with anyone.

I shut myself down immediately, but continued to consume gay, lgbt, and trans media for years and years after, allowing myself to do this because I could convince myself that I was just “a straight girl” who was a big fan of the community.

After coming to college and experiencing true freedom from the expectations and values placed on me, it took me less than three days to come to the realization that I was in fact, extremely not straight. It took me 6 more months to fully feel comfortable admitting to myself and claiming the label that I was gay. It took me another year to “come out” to all of my friends and folx I really cared about.

-talk about how this is a divide between my experience and the experiences of the friends I made here. L & their friends came out when they were extremely young, in middle school actually. Our timelines diverge here.

Only recently, I began to make friends on the shared experience of our queerness. Meeting my close friends now, sharing intimate + tender moments. Loving each other and supporting one another the way family might do. A queer kind of love shared in these emotional bonds. A kind of love I had not experienced before my full acceptance and life as a queer person. Tender, radical love.

Meeting L, sharing on our experience of being queer and trans. And not to say that their life in Norway is so much better. The Nordic model may allow for some general acceptance, but queerphobia still has its roots in other malicious ways. Many of L’s friends still don’t use their pronouns. A is called the slur version of the word lesbian, and she recognizes that being a lesbian is not favorable to society. She wants to be a prof of gender studies at her uni but told me that since there is already one queer person on staff, she’ll never be hired on.

M telling me about how even tho queer ppl are accepted on the outside, and in the law, in practice, not so much.

-A telling me that people hate lesbians

-in Norwegian, the word for lesbian is also really similar to the slur, “fucking lesbian”

CONNECTION TO THE FIRST ARTICLE WE READ

Norway’s state feminism and inclusion of queerness is heteronormative, only assimilating those that fit into the family, hetero model (thinking to naked sculpture park, extremely family oriented)

Same sex has to still be straight – family, private, culturally straight.

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freeqthamighty · 6 years

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Woman Witnesses Police Brutality and is Arrested for Her Intervention | #JusticeForRodneka #BlackLivesMatter

IMMEDIATE ACTION STEPS:

LIKE the #JusticeForRodneka page for updates. READ and SHARE Rodneka’s story (use #JusticeForRodneka) or share this article to your networks.

DONATE and SHARE THE DONATION LINK with your networks — www.gofundme.com/rodneka

SHOW UP WEARING WHITE for Rodneka at 9AM at 2700 Tulane Ave, Section H on January 12th, 2018 for her trial date. Check the Facebook page for date changes.

Imagine you’re driving home from work. Expecting an uneventful ride, you’re surprised to see the blinding glare of police lights in front of you. As your eyes adjust to the scene, other things start coming into view.

A baby blanket.

The “slick and shine” of a baby’s head.

A woman who is holding the baby. A police officer who is choking and pulling the hair of the woman holding the baby.

Imagine your basic human decency kicking in, forcing you to intervene. You stop your car in the middle of the street and run over to them, thoughts racing of the potential fate of both woman and baby. You get ahold of the child and hand the child off to a bystander who had asked for them.

“Be human!” you hear yourself calling out repeatedly to the police officer as he stares blankly at you. “Be human!” you hear yourself calling repeatedly as a crowd forms and watches this officer, still with a “debilitating hold” on the woman.

Imagine the woman the police officer is choking exclaims she doesn’t know why this is happening to her, only for the officer to body slam her onto the ground. The crowd yells at her to “stop resisting” and you, having watched the entire episode, beg them to see her humanity, her natural reaction to being choked with a baby in her arms by saying, “she is not resisting”!

Imagine the woman is now face down on the ground, the officer on her back, with his arm around her neck. “You’re choking her!” you scream, only to be met with an amused look from the officer who shouts back, “look, I’m not choking her”. Never mind the small amount of foam discharging from her throat, drops of it seen coming out of the sides of her mouth.

Imagine you’ve tried once, twice, three times now to record the officer. You are less than five feet away from him and the woman he is assaulting. Your full attention is on her safety, even at the expense of your own. Before you notice, other officers, who you thought were on the way to help the woman, tackle you off your feet.

Within seconds, you no longer have to theoretically relate to the woman.

Now, your own Black woman body is against the concrete, handcuffs clamped around your wrists. As you’re dragged to the police car, you plead with a stranger to go to your job — not five minutes away — and tell a friend to come get your car. The stranger refuses to get involved.

You are arrested. You spend the next two nights in jail, not eating for 20 hours. You are unable to access your medical routine for 48 hours and your bail is set at $2500. Imagine for the next few months, you are faced with a series of financially and emotionally stressful court dates on top of the stress and trauma caused by the initial assault by the officer(s).

If you #TrustBlackWomen, then you don’t have to imagine any of this story. This is the reality for New Orleanian Rodneka S. On April 23rd, 2017, Rodneka experienced this ordeal on her way from work (read it in her own words and SHARE on Facebook here).

And she is not alone.

Her case highlights the continued mistreatment and abuse of Black people by law enforcement agents and the ways the system continues to punish and criminalize Black people after they’ve had their rights and bodies violated by agents of the state.

In the United States, when it is the word of a police officer against that of a civilian, the officer’s account is usually taken as truth (this is why, initially, people were so excited about body cameras on police officers). This happens despite the multiple times we’ve seen officers find cover hiding behind the “blue wall of silence”, and the times we’ve seen officers manipulate the law to criminalize others in order to avoid accountability for their crimes.

In 2015, Daniel Holtzclaw, a former Oklahoma City Police Department patrol officer, was convicted of multiple counts of rape, sexual battery and other charges. Holtzclaw had systematically and strategically targeted and violated 13 low-income Black women while on duty. Through gross misuse of power and an even grosser understanding of society’s inability to #TrustBlackWomen, Officer Holtzclaw was able to sexually abuse these women. As the prosecutor on the case, Lori McConnell, stated, “He didn’t choose CEOs or soccer moms; he chose women he could count on not telling what he was doing…He counted on the fact no one would believe them and no one would care.”

These same intersections of race, gender and believability in the United States collide in an exhaustingly familiar way in Rodneka’s case, where she is charged with battery of a police officer and resisting arrest for stopping to help someone else that fateful night.

The charges against Rodneka are equally telling. Somehow, we are expected to believe that this Black woman who was minding her own business coming home from work leapt out of her car unprovoked to assault a police officer.

The story sounds ridiculous to me, but then again, I do not subscribe to notions of Black people’s criminality or violent nature as many still do in the United States and around the world. It is this same narrative of Blackness as violent and uncontrollable (and in need of being controlled) that allowed Officer Darren Wilson to shoot Mike Brown in cold blood, then say he feared for his life. After all, according to Wilson, Brown looked “like a demon”,and had reached into Wilson’s car without reason, punching him in the face, initiating the need to protect himself through lethal violence.

Rodneka joins the list of Black people charged with resisting arrest when making calls for their basic humanity to be considered during arrest. According to her story, Rodneka was close to the officer, but did not initiate contact.

PHOTO CAPTION: #JusticeForRodneka Court Support Team. You can support her directly by donating at www.gofundme.com/rodneka

Yet, when other officers arrived on the scene, she was immediately tackled and arrested. Her call to be treated like a human being was twisted into assault against others, which is too often the case when people who are intimidated by the police assert their rights. This portion of her story reminded me of Earldreka White, a Black woman who was pulled over for a traffic stop then violently arrested and charged with resisting arrest, not for any alleged traffic crime she had committed. In this country, the very existence of Black people is criminalized. The Earldreka’s and Rodneka’s of the world don’t have to do anything in order to be eligible for arrest. It is especially telling in cases in which resisting arrest is the only charge issued.

On January 12th, 2018, Rodneka faces her next court date. This means we have just over a month to rally our communities behind this young woman. Rodneka’s ask is simple — treat her with the human dignity the police officers didn’t accord her. Believe her story. Share her story. And, if you can, show up and let her know she doesn’t have to be the sole author in this story of struggle.

The Movement for Black Lives Matter began when Trayvon Martin was killed. It has since been reduced by mainstream media to the lethal police violence faced by mostly young Black men. However, the Movement for Black Lives has a much more expansive definition of state violence that includes cases like Rodneka’s. In order for #BlackLivesMatter to actually be realized, our lives have to matter while we’re still alive. #BlackLivesMatter is not just a call to mourn our deaths when we’ve been unjustly and often brutally killed — it is a demand for our right to live full lives without fear of violence by individuals or the state from the moment we are born.

Rodneka has one more desperate plea specific to the New Orleans community — if you were filming or simply present the night of the incident on April 27th, 2017, PLEASE REACH OUT to the #JusticeForRodneka campaign at [email protected] or through the Facebook page.

Rodneka had this to say about her experiences since that night: “This whole situation has impacted my life greatly in every aspect. The greatest is psychologically as it has shattered my pseudo reality that I am free in 2017. I am certainly not free of harm by law enforcement and I have been exposed to the system that allow this to be. It has also however confirmed to me that there is a community of ppl in my city of New Orleans who look like me that love, work for, and sacrifice for the ppl like me contrary to popular belief. We are not desensitized and we stand for each other and that’s the world I live in. The only thing I regret is that I have not obtained a dash cam to record the events of April 23rd. I wish the lil Sistah believed that she was worth the help. Sometimes I wish I’d never had to witness what I saw but there’s no fixing a problem that is not acknowledged. I think it’s important that we all understand that in the stride to be sane or mentally functional, humans sometimes have to believe notions that aren’t true. Both victims and beneficiaries of abuse. It keeps us functional but it also keeps us prey to the problems we refuse to see before us. The problem now is what happened to me has happened to others and can happen to you. Let’s work on fixing the problem. It’s not so hard when we work together.”

Standing up for or against injustice is often difficult, thankless work. Despite this, Rodneka did her part, alone, on the night of April 23rd, 2017. As a community, let’s make sure she doesn’t have to face her next steps alone.

IMMEDIATE ACTION STEPS:

READ and SHARE Rodneka’s story with #JusticeForRodneka or share this article to your networks. LIKE the #JusticeForRodneka page for updates

DONATE and SHARE THE DONATION LINK with your networks — www.gofundme.com/rodneka

SHOW UP WEARING WHITE for Rodneka at 9AM at 2700 Tulane Ave, Section H on January 12th, 2018 for her trial date. Check the Facebook page for date changes.

#BlackLivesMatter #JusticeForRodneka #TrustBlackWomen #PoliceBrutality #SayHerName #policeviolence #neworleans #nola #nopd #stateviolence #myexistenceispolitical

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rhinointherain · 4 years

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28-8-2020

if this type of high was a color it would be pink, deep dark hot electric pink, the color of romanticization, the color of everything you wish should have been but never was and never could be

-here i watched a video about physics-

physics is the study of our “existence”/“reality”/physical universe within the Everything (and thats why the study of Everything that “outside of” this “existence”/“reality”/physical universe is called metaphysics)

by studying physics/the physical world closely enough, we begin to see “properties” of the Everything, like we can understand the “background” within which it/its “properties” are situated by learning about how and why the physical world acts the way it does

“Life” is just really really complex physical processes, technically there is no “difference”/inherent distinction between “living” and “nonliving” “things”, some “things” just are more of these processes happening at once and some other “things” have less. when a living thing “dies” most of its more complex processes stop occurring and so the complex web of interacting processes which classify one as being “alive” cannot function anymore. and then eventually it starts to literally decay until all of its processes, even the ones that continued after it “died” such as its maintenance of its physical structure, no longer happen as their materials have been taken up by/used in other exterior processes. So by this logic Harris was right, there is no “consciousness” and there is no “self”, when the processes of thought (neurons firing in networks) aren’t happening there is no inherent “being”, at least physically there is not a “self” and the concept cannot exist, what we think of as the “self” might be a sort of “ blueprint “ of what about one “human”’s (human=series of chemical processes that make up what we consider to be a “human”) processes different than any other human’s. if i think of something does it not “exist” just because I conceived of it? what does it mean to be real, can things that are not physically real be “real” in their own way, so I guess it depends on what we consider “real” to mean.

and this is particularly why it’s difficult and awkward to address the question of whether the ideas i write down in my journal entries are “real” as in they are true or if theyre “fake” because I’m high and am convinced that things that are not true are true. how could they not be “true” if I think them, me thinking them means they are being perceived, even if they are not being perceived in the way that physical phenomena are. what does it even mean to “perceive”? is “reality” contingent on what is “perceived” and what isn’t? Is two atoms bumping into each other the atoms “perceiving” each other in the same way that touch receptors “feel” touch, or taste buds “taste”, or vision receptors “see” by “perceiving” light? why don’t i know virtually anything about what protons and neutrons and electrons are made out of. i mean i know theyre made of quarks and their differences become from the ratios of like different types of quarks that are in them but i have actually no idea what that means. i need to know a lot more things to fully understanding these ideas, like I need to find out what light is and what energy is godsh i feel so foolish and uneducated how have i been content to go through life thus far not even feeling the need to know????

And/or should be a word in the dictionary, it’s its own word with its own meaning not just two words stuck together

also remember to think about how your emotional and idealistic associations with being high affect the ideas that you have while you’re high, although now that i’m thinking about it, it is probably quite good to write about these emotional associations as i have been doing because then i can understand and analyze them more fully

I went back and read the paragraph i wrote earlier in this entry about what physics is an what the difference is between it and metaphysics, and it made me think, how could there not be a “GOD”? If physics/our physical universe/“reality” exists, then doesn’t “not that” also have to “exist”, just because it exists as a concept?Like what i was just talking about with what it means to be “real”?

Oh I sound JUST like saint anselm ! Didn’t he already say the exact same thing???? He totally did.

But anyway god IS metaphysics, at least the God that judeo-christian religion is referring to. God is everything that is not physics/the physical universe. so I think that with dualistic religions, like Catharism (the one i actually know enough about to feel comfortable discussing esp because there aren’t really any people today who follow it whom I risk offending if I misinterpret something about it), the two “gods” are the physical world (the “bad”/material/“corrupt” cathar God) and metaphysics (the “good”/“pure”/“heavenly” cathar God). the “gods” of Greek mythology and i guess norse mythology and probably many polytheistic religions (but i definitely cannot say that this applies to most or all polytheistic religions because i dont know enough about most or all of them) are, in the view of their believers, part of the physical world, so comparing deities/“gods” like these to the metaphysical judeo-christian “God” is kind of useless in a way because they are too different. i am not highly informed about the terms “yin” and “yang” but from my knowledge of them (like a few online articles or whatever) what i am talking about very much falls into this concept. yin and yang are physics and metaphysics. {i realize in earlier entries ive very foolishly used the term “cosmos” when what i really meant was “metaphysics/metaphysical reality/metaphysical “existence” (and once again, i am trying my best to use the right words to describe what i mean but as l keep saying over and over again, the words existence, reality, being, etc. need to be a lot more rigidly defined before any actual productive discussion about these ideas can occur)}, but anyway, “metaphysics” and “physics” are yin and yang.

so yes sure i guess the greeks, for example” “worshipped physics”, although that’s not to say they didn’t have a lot of things “wrong” (according to our modern perspective) about how it worked, but according to their understanding of the physical world lightning bolts got made by a dude named Zeus, that was physics to them. Christians, Muslims, and Jews, as example, “worship metaphysics”, which is no less “rational” than worshipping “physics” because like how stupid to you have to be not to “believe” in metaphysics right? they are both “things” that “exist” because they “exist” as “concepts”. they are just different, and either “religious” approach may be varying degrees of “right” or “wrong” in their ideas of things and how they work (although again, what does that even mean, what does it mean to be “true” or “not true”, but anyway), but like one example is the question of whether the way in which ppl use these religions to interact with physics or metaphysics (like setting up altars, making sacrifices, consulting oracles) is “effective”, like does it “do what they think it does” ie have an effect on either physics or metaphysics and how the two “interact”, or help you learn something about it etc?

So i guess by this logic a dualist outlook on “religion” resemblingthe Cathars (and i THINK the zoroastrians too from what i understand about their beliefs), ie metaphysics and physics and the interaction between the two, is the most all-encompassing perspective on what “Existence” “Is”. Thats not to say anything about the ritual aspect of any faith, i really don’t know which one is most “accurate” or if any of them are at all. So guess i am a Dualist now??. But then again, it would definitely be also helpful to explore the outlooks provided by other religions to see what they have to say, and whether they incorporate elements into their understandings that are useful to think about. like i feel like i know some facts about hinduism as in i could tell you some things that hindus believe, but i don’t have a “deep” enough understanding of the religion to tell you what aspects of their belief deal with physics and/or metaphysics. like what i would guess about it from my understanding is that it kind of deals with both? like Brahman is almost certainly metaphysics {and actually in many ways has a more “accurate” and wide-encompassing understanding of what “metaphysics” “is” than most other religions i have heard of}, and nirvana is attaining the union of the two? {like obviously not the union of the whole entire physics and whole entire metaphysics but like, within one’s self? [again, im not sure if the “self” does “exist” in the physical world and am inclined at the moment to think that it doesn’t, even though the things that “make it up” (ie your neurons and the “thoughts”/firing patterns they create) are part of the physical world. although AGAIN that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t “exist”, because one can conceive of it, or because it is part of metaphysical “existence”, or both? Or neither??] Or is nirvana like, you become aware of where “you” are within the whole conglomeration of the two, and are able to understand more about everything because of this? In a way i think it might be both, i should think about that more in the future.} Isn’t Brahman said to like, “be present” in the physical world, like in each individual thing ?does this mean that hinduism deals primarily with the interaction between physics and metaphysics? Rather than focusing on the two as “equal” but “opposite” concepts like the Cathars or zoroastrians. Again I’m really not comfortable making a whole bunch of analysis on hinduism, even after learning a bunch about it i still have a hard time understanding what their gods/deities are supposed to be/represent in relation to all this.

Ok yeah i had a helpful thought: I think the reason I am struggling with the definition of “existence” is because im not sure whether im using that word to refer to physical existence, or the combination of both “physical” and “metaphysical” existence. Same with “reality”.

i NEED to establish a glossary of terminology in order to be able to analyze anything further in a meaningful way! i think i am at the point where i can actually start to do this or at least try!

am realizing now that one of the chief questions i’ve been grappling with in these entries is “what is metaphysics”, as have scientists, shamans, theologians, priests, psychonauts etc for centuries and millenia before me. idk being able to concretely state what i am asking might be helpful in charting a course of thought

So how does the idea of physics vs metaphysics relate to the “space-time continuum” that i was talking about in earlier entries? So we have our physical universe that you and i “exist” in, and the “multiverse” which is every other possible universe along an infinite infinity of infinite axes, but is metaphysics the “multiverse”, or is metaphysics somehow what is “outside the multiverse”? how could you even understand what it meant to be “outside the multiverse”? fuck this is really difficult to think about. hmmmm i don’t think there can be an “outside” the multiverse because the multiverse is already everything that is “outside” the universe. right, because the multiverse is infinite in an infinite number of directions and not “bound” so it is not something outside of which anything can be conceived.

yeah okay and this makes sense with the saint anselm thing, because if you can think of “something”, your conception of what that “something” is is bound by your definition of what you conceive that “something” to “be”. and if you define metaphysics as “the Stuff that is Not Physics/Not Our Physical Universe”, that mean metaphysics exists because it is the like, antithesis of physics, so it doesn’t exist in the same way that the physical universe does but that doesn’t mean it isn’t “real”. Like how in a mirror there can’t be a reflection of something that isn’t physically there to be reflected, but that doesn’t mean the reflection “isn’t real” too.

I’ve been typing for over two hours, i think i should take a rest lol.

Do you think its possible that certain elements of fashion, popular culture, etc come back into style every 20ish years (?) because the people who are the most influential in determining trends at any given time internalized the trends of 20ish years ago as what it meant to be “cool” when they were at the age of learning what “cool” was and so they bring those trends back either consciously or subconsciously?

#journal #aug 2020 #🌿

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kanjiklance · 7 years

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s3 in review. it’s a bit long just warning you

wow. i went in with low expectations bc of s2 and man. this was a good season. like... a lot better than what i was expecting at least

the lion switch wasn’t as bad as i thought it was. like y’all know i was a lil miffed about the lion switches at the end of s2 but i think the dynamics of this new team is pretty good. i’m really happy they showed allura, lance, and keith struggling in their new lions at first (i love keith being like ‘black is a piece of junk wtf man’) bc you know this kind of technology technically shouldn’t be something one can pick up easily. and while the reasoning for the lion switches could have probably been written/developed/explained a bit better, it wasn’t as bad imo as that one article i read recently put it. also shiro replacing allura as the one in the castle while she’s piloting blue though... what an interesting development

i still hate the alternate reality episode so much. i mean lmao it was a chance to bring sven into the show but wtf. allura did show off her weapon for the first time in the ep but it’s still dead to me

the history of voltron????

i’m so glad they put it in this season bc it was so interesting... i love how the original paladins’ dynamics still match the current paladins’ dynamics... the green, blue, and yellow paladins being a trio unit... red being the right hand man of black...

they rushed the explanations about the lions and voltron imo. maybe it was bc i couldn’t hear too well or couldn’t comprehend what they were saying fast enough or something... but i guess bc they only had one episode to do it, they just kind of had the paladins understand everything immediately lol. i’m also gagged at the fact that alfor was actually the RED paladin while everyone was like ‘he’s the yellow paladin!!’

also allura never piloted in the past?? i was surprised that the original paladins were the only paladins of the lions other than the current group

(also damn i mean this would’ve probably been a lot for the animators to animate but i was a bit surprised the lions’ paint was already chipping back then? i would’ve assumed it would’ve been shiny and new back then and because of time their paint chipped. ah well)

ALSO HAGGAR BEING ZARKON’S WIFE??? i’m gonna scream like i think it was insinuated by ppl before but wow i can’t believe it’s canon. also lotor being haggar’s son then... does he know haggar is his mom or...?

hunk:

he still didn’t have much development and a lot of his dialogue involved food, but i did notice they did include more scenes and dialogue of him being smart and an engineer compared to s2... progress in the right direction at least.

that scene of him and lance fighting and backing up the blade of mamora in the first ep tho was probably one of the highlights of s3 tbqh... i was so sad they didn’t have another similar scene the rest of the season

the garrison trio:

i was so happy they had more scenes together!! like they came to space together and they were a unit back in the garrison... it makes sense that they would usually stick together despite becoming friends with the rest of voltron.

them going off by themselves and talking about being suspicious of alteans in the alternate reality was so so good

allura:

HOLY FUCK!! I’M SO HAPPY SHE GOT THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT SHE NEEDED AND DESERVED!!

first off, her bayard weapon????? and her being totally kick-ass with it??? my mood was lance when he was being a sniper and watching her.

and then her finally connecting with blue????? wow i was so happy she’s getting all that she deserves... that scene where she outsmarted lotor was so damn satisfying like... omg. i can’t wait until she can actually punch him through the face

also i’m happy they finally gave her a moment to grieve and mourn... she’s had to put on a face this entire time after losing her father a second time and i’m glad they were able to show her vulnerable. she’s the same age as the other paladins after all apparently, so i’m glad they tried to show that fact more this season

keith:

i’m really happy with his development. i was pretty doubtful of him becoming the leader but i think the show handled it really well. putting my anti-keith-as-black-paladin-feelings aside, i’m glad that they showed keith being doubtful about his leadership abilities and also making mistakes as a leader. i think it’s really realistic and for once i’m looking forward to seeing him develop further as a leader

but to acknowledge the elephant in the room... those klance moments though. like let’s be real... i was like ‘holy fuck are these really happening???’ the scene of them talking in keith’s room... lance always stepping up to comfort keith... lance always having keith’s back............... i mean i’m still here for the headcanon that lance doesn’t actually like keith like that while keith pines but holy fuck man. i’m so gd here for a klance endgame. idk if it’s actually gonna happen but this is really good development regardless

shiro:

ok... i was kind of disappointed with his episode. i thought they were gonna develop him as a person but literally not much happened other than him trying to get back to voltron.

also they didn’t talk that much about why and how he got recaptured by the galra... hopefully they’ll explain it fully in s4 or in the future bc wtf? i mean keith was insinuating that zarkon set him up but what

and yeah i agree w some other posts i’ve seen that that his comeback was kind of... sudden. i would have personally been fine with him not showing up until s4 again but whatever. i think it would’ve been good to spend the entire season to develop the new team dynamics bc it doesn’t quite make sense for them to automatically continue accepting keith as the leader while shiro is back. i mean the entirety of that one ep was the team valuing shiro’s commands over keith’s but still. but then again i guess we don’t know how long they were really without shiro

also his long hair and facial hair look is so fucking ugly... like every second i was like ‘when tf is he gonna buzz it off. when is he gonna shave. please for the love of god...’

lance:

lance... the best boi... i’m so happy with his development this season

they’re starting to get more into his insecurities and self-doubt and i’m really glad keith is willing to support him in general and in red. the scene of all of them taking turns in the black lion killed me bc you could tell lance was sizing himself up w keith (who was accepted in the end)... and also when blue rejected lance and lance gave her up to allura.... lord almighty.............

also they were completely right about lance stepping up as a leader in his own way. like he’s not the black paladin nor is he a defined leader but it’s telling seeing him step up to comfort and support keith despite him not liking keith as the leader. (also lmao at keith being like ‘i don’t want to be leader. if you want it you can have it [lance]’) even though apparently lance is the youngest child in his family (supposedly), he swallows his pride and accepts keith as leader and allura as having blue without throwing a tantrum or something... augh if only lance knew how valuable he really is to the team

sniper lance??? like the best thing that could have happened to me all day

y’all know i’m gonna reblog so many posts of lance from this season. i love him so much

lotor and his squad:

i’m actually really excited with what they’re doing with lotor’s character. i think it’s going in a good direction by making him a gray morals character and i think he has the potential to be a villain i actually enjoy

i love his squad of generals so much... every single one of them... i’m really excited to see them in the future!!!!

also the azura general (sorry idr any of their names lmao......) and keith... i’m honestly here for her being keith’s sister (NOT his mom... that’d be too much and also she’s a bit young i think).

urg i’m losing steam rn since this post is so gd long but i think that sums it all up. this was a good season and it actually wasn’t a waste of my time. i’m bitter to say this, but i’m excited to see s4 and where the story goes from here!

#s3 spoilers #my robotic thoughts

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zenruption · 7 years

Text

The Daily Disaster-6/9

Add to Flipboard Magazine.

AN UNDER-APPRECIATED PROBLEM WITH THE TRUMP PRESIDENCY IS HOW HE AND HIS STAFF CONTINUOUSLY NORMALIZE DISASTER. BECAUSE WE WITNESS NEW SCANDALS, GAFFES, COVERUPS, HYPOCRISY, MISDIRECTION, INCOMPETENCE, ATROCITY, CRONYISM, IGNORANCE, RACISM, XENOPHOBIA, TREASON, EMBARRASSMENT, LIES, DYSFUNCTION, POWER GRABS, WAR ESCALATIONS, ENVIRONMENTAL ASSAULTS, MISOGYNY AND MORE ON A DAILY BASIS, THE MAGNITUDE OF EACH IS DIMINISHED IN OUR CONSCIOUSNESS BY THE SIMPLE VIRTUE THAT WE HAVE BECOME SATURATED. BECAUSE OF THIS, WE AT ZENRUPTION WILL BE PUBLISHING A DAILY CURATION OF THE EVENTS THAT HAVE BEEN REPORTED, FROM VARIOUS SOURCES, INCLUDING LEAKS WITHIN THE WHITE HOUSE, SO THAT WE CAN FULLY EXPERIENCE THE LEVEL OF DISASTER OUR EXECUTIVE BRANCH HAS BECOME AND THE IMPLICATIONS IT HAS ON ALL OF US. TODAY, JUNE 9, 2017

Check back often

and contribute!

By Jerry Mooney

From The Horse's Mouth (Trump tweets, then leaker tweets, then published reports)

Congratulations to Jeb Hensarling & Republicans on successful House vote to repeal major parts of the 2010 Dodd-Frank financial law. GROWTH!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 9, 2017

Despite so many false statements and lies, total and complete vindication...and WOW, Comey is a leaker!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 9, 2017

Great reporting by @foxandfriends and so many others. Thank you!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) June 9, 2017

.@RealDonaldTrump says "Comey's a leaker." A private citizen giving a friend private, non-classified documents isn't leaking

— West Wing Reports (@WestWingReport) June 9, 2017

If only Comey did something innocent, like blurt out Israeli intel to the Russians. https://t.co/XH1zu91bRg

— Matt Parthasarthy (@Matt4CT) June 9, 2017

Dear MSM, I am leaking a personal recollection of my visit to the WH last December. #ComeyLeaks pic.twitter.com/T8Jn8ABICG

— Matt Parthasarthy (@Matt4CT) June 9, 2017

Good for Trump there's no very clear and topical evidence of him using "hope" as a threat. Wait. https://t.co/Jx1xLgDYnO

— Chris Geidner (@chrisgeidner) June 8, 2017

GOP using Comey hearing/Russia as shell game. Dodd-Frank repeal is real focus & has been "close to #1" on list of priorities since election.

— Rogue WH Snr Advisor (@RogueSNRadvisor) June 8, 2017

So far during Comey hearing staff have taken 4 cellphones and 1 iPad away from Pres; he just can't help himself, he has to tweet.

— Rogue WH Snr Advisor (@RogueSNRadvisor) June 8, 2017

After Comey hearing Pres "doesn't want to hear another word about Russia - from anyone." Don't think that's gonna happen, Donnie.

— Rogue WH Snr Advisor (@RogueSNRadvisor) June 8, 2017

Pres says the result of the Comey hearing "means I'll be president for at least the next 8 years."

— Rogue WH Snr Advisor (@RogueSNRadvisor) June 9, 2017

"And by total and complete vindication, I mean publicly shamed." https://t.co/z2gpynw0Ms

— Rogue WH Snr Advisor (@RogueSNRadvisor) June 9, 2017

It rhymes with Crussia https://t.co/iHDJzdSAwg

— Rogue WH Snr Advisor (@RogueSNRadvisor) June 9, 2017

After Comey hearing Pres wants to "double down" on Obama, says "we need to make clear who the real enemy is." Oh we know who it is, Donald.

— Rogue WH Snr Advisor (@RogueSNRadvisor) June 9, 2017

TRUMP: "I'll make him an offer he can't refuse" REPUBLICANS IN CONGRESS: See, Trump was only making an "offer"; he didn't demand anything

— Judd Legum (@JuddLegum) June 9, 2017

His tax returns (twice) Preemptive NK attack bluff Location of US submarines Israeli intel on ISIS Privileged comms w/ Comey#LeakedByTrump

— Rogue POTUS Staff (@RoguePOTUSStaff) June 9, 2017

POTUS says everyone should move on after yesterday, but his top objective today is to find more ways to make Comey look bad.

— Rogue POTUS Staff (@RoguePOTUSStaff) June 9, 2017

People leaking their own words to a free press is so elitist compared to a gold plated penthouse. https://t.co/wPNqX6OJyu

— Rogue POTUS Staff (@RoguePOTUSStaff) June 8, 2017

Quite the story from Nancy Pelosi about her first meeting with Trump—and his insistence that he won the popular vote. (via @Morning_Joe) pic.twitter.com/xvmCmJA6el

— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) June 9, 2017

Pelosi: Sessions must resign https://t.co/uiRszvGqqV pic.twitter.com/LmVkRHCpMm

— The Hill (@thehill) June 9, 2017

"Total and complete vindication"? More like total and complete incrimination. My take on Comey testimony: https://t.co/lUkDMSn0QM

— Max Boot (@MaxBoot) June 9, 2017

Do you think Trump understands what "vindication" means? It's not clear to me that he does. pic.twitter.com/ybh0rcNMh8

— Claude Taylor (@TrueFactsStated) June 9, 2017

TRUMP: "I'll make him an offer he can't refuse" REPUBLICANS IN CONGRESS: See, Trump was only making an "offer"; he didn't demand anything

— Judd Legum (@JuddLegum) June 9, 2017

Jobs where "I'm New At This" is acceptable... - Server - Retail - Entry level programmer - Cook Job it's not... - President Of The USA

— Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) June 9, 2017

McInnis involved. I "hope" he "falls" down some stairs soon.https://t.co/6He8hstBCj

— Pesach 'Pace' Lattin (@pacelattin) June 9, 2017

If you believe Trump's lawyer, Comey must have secretly made up a fake story & then told witnesses & wrote memos about it contemporaneously. https://t.co/aXcecVqbTd

— Ted Lieu (@tedlieu) June 9, 2017

Let's not forget DAG Rosenstein wrote an entire memo used to mislead American people that Trump fired Comey b/c he treated Hillary unfairly.

— Ted Lieu (@tedlieu) June 9, 2017

Even the Tronc-owned right-leaning @LATimes - not part of the "liberal" media -- says you are unmatched for lying pic.twitter.com/78JrUdGS6L

— Jack Schofield (@jackschofield) June 9, 2017

Nixon was not personally under investigation for Watergate...until he was.

— Bill Kristol (@BillKristol) June 9, 2017

GREAT ANALYSIS for 2018. To retake the House, Dems don't need to convince Trump voters who would support Trump shooting someone on 5th Ave. https://t.co/BR8EqueVAn

— Ted Lieu (@tedlieu) June 9, 2017

I don't understand why local television & newspaper reporters aren't up in Senators /staffers faces & writing scathing stories every day @AP https://t.co/oeyPIqdqd7

— RiotWomenn (@riotwomennn) June 9, 2017

The grab-them-by-the-pussy video comes out. Trump: "This shows how much I love women. I'm vindicated."

— David Corn (@DavidCornDC) June 9, 2017

Full Grassley letter, which is a must-read: https://t.co/5DSh7cTzcr

— Chris Geidner (@chrisgeidner) June 9, 2017

Grassley: "Every member of Congress is a Constitutional officer ... all members need accurate information from the Executive Branch." pic.twitter.com/R28QUX1Sgw

— Chris Geidner (@chrisgeidner) June 9, 2017

Wow. Big deal. Very important vis-a-vis Mueller, but also as to the court and things Dreeben could be conflicted out from going forward. https://t.co/YjfcSC90a0

— Chris Geidner (@chrisgeidner) June 9, 2017

Former GOP congressman who called on Bill Clinton to resign and voted to impeach him --> https://t.co/dsKl9yCdfL

— Jake Tapper (@jaketapper) June 9, 2017

To help infrastructure firms navigate the federal bureaucracy, President is adding to it by forming an agency to help cut thru red tape

— West Wing Reports (@WestWingReport) June 9, 2017

My best Cap Hill source: (long time senior staffer). GOP not sure Trump will survive this. "We're preparing for all contingencies".

— Claude Taylor (@TrueFactsStated) June 9, 2017

Trump "didn't know" we have troops in Qatar. He should know what countries we have our military in. Important for countless reasons. #resist https://t.co/QbgvMz9b8I

— Scott Dworkin (@funder) June 9, 2017

More importantly, Michael Dreeben is careful, meticulous, non-partisan, and fair-minded. His loyalty is to the Constitution alone. https://t.co/9a7jwHVH1K

— Preet Bharara (@PreetBharara) June 9, 2017

YES! We went there & saw the Taj Mahal. Ppl were all saying it looked exactly like Kremlin.It came out he was laundering Russian mob money! pic.twitter.com/6MyIXmhabf

— Wendy Marcinkiewicz (@WendyMarcinkie1) June 8, 2017

In past year Trump has threatened to sue everyone, it seems, but the Girl Scouts (perhaps WWR missed that one) - but never follows through: pic.twitter.com/AyrLUr6ra3

— West Wing Reports (@WestWingReport) June 9, 2017

The point of Comey's testimony wasn't to convict Trump-it was to aid and assist Mueller's case. He accomplished that.

— Claude Taylor (@TrueFactsStated) June 9, 2017

Fun fact: Article II of Impeachment for Nixon was Abuse of Power. My #FridayFeeling is that @realDonaldTrump is in bigly trouble. https://t.co/d1VXUZwcvL

— Ted Lieu (@tedlieu) June 9, 2017

pic.twitter.com/M4CAXvwVWW

— Sarah Burgess (@sunkist111) June 9, 2017

.@RealDonaldTrump, who threatens to sue everyone (sexual misconduct accusers, NYTimes, etc.), but rarely does, now threatens to sue Comey

— West Wing Reports (@WestWingReport) June 9, 2017

Trump's lawyer threatens to file complaints against Comey. But they're both already DOA. By @christinawilkie https://t.co/TJQornwHTr

— Christina Wilkie (@christinawilkie) June 9, 2017

For Trump, the ‘Cloud’ Just Grew That Much Darker https://t.co/xU2K9pHX7f

— Nada Bakos (@nadabakos) June 9, 2017

Charm. Bully. Abandon. Sue. That's how @realDonaldTrump deals with problems. It's on full display with his actions toward Comey.

— Nancy Pelosi (@NancyPelosi) June 9, 2017

Dreeben is 1 of the top legal & appellate minds at DOJ in modern times (My admiration goes far beyond his 8-0 insider trading win in Salman) https://t.co/o1sGMwoZEQ

— Preet Bharara (@PreetBharara) June 9, 2017

It's true. https://t.co/dsicCwan8V

— Pesach 'Pace' Lattin (@pacelattin) June 9, 2017

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Also founder of Jerry Mooney Books

#45 #President of the United States #Trump

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