i drew this with my finger, i am not a finger artist
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one of the most infuriating things about becoming an adult is when you realize that it actually is 10x easier to solve problems by making a phone call vs literally any other communication method
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
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They are both intensely relieved but they don't understand why.
I just wondered how the present disaster twins would handle the recent emotional ordeal of the last update.
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Vlad was injured by the GIW, and fled through a random experimental portal they had.
He landed outside a smoking warehouse in Ethiopia, next to a dying child.
The kid was beat to hell and back, and worse off than Vlad himself.
There was a clown, ducking into a car, covered in the kids blood.
Vlad, desperate for an outlet for his anger at being stupid enough to be caught by the GIW, immediately turns around and hunts the man down.
By the time he's done with the clown, he's even eaten the man's newly formed ghost, permanently ending the threat.
Which leads to his current predicament; the dying kid is still dying, and he's calmed down enough to know he would feel bad later about letting some random kid die like this.
Luckily, he saw some ninjas while he was killing the clown, and after a short conversation, they agree to take the boy.
Vlad feels accomplished.
After all, what child wouldn't want to be raised by ninjas?
Meanwhile, Jason, delirious from pain and smoke inhalation, thinks he saw Batman murder the Joker and then turn around and sell him to Ra's Al Ghul (Vlad in his ghost form has pointy things on his head, and Jason was so fucked up he thought it was the cowl).
Jason's still fucked up and pissed when he comes back, but for entirely different reasons.
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I know Satan is like, an angry terrifying being in nightbringer like
SATAN the avatar of wrath !
BUT anytime i go on my home screen and he's like
ALL I CAN SEE IS JUSt--
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Honestly, it was the countdown for me. Everything else I can laugh off, but the countdown???? They actually thought this news would be a god sent to us. That it was SO EXCITING to prompt a countdown to the announcement of their subscription thing. That's so out of touch like damn.
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If you ever find yourself questioning your own intelligence, just remember that Jujutsu Kaisen gave us a character who is the undisputed strongest living being in his universe (so much so that his birth altered the balance of the entire world around him) and is canonically able to do anything he tries; who could have decided to spend his entire life doing absolutely whatever tf he wanted because there is literally no one and nothing with the power to stop him, but instead chose to use his strength to protect and train the next generation to be strong and intelligent enough to overhaul the current oppressive system that would have stripped those innocent kids of their lives and precious youth in the same way it did his own generation, and this was a good portion of the fandom’s reaction to said character:
mostly based on one (1) line removed from 5 layers of context. When the majority of the story wouldn't have taken place at all if not for his strong sense of morality. I am so Tired.
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