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solarpunkani · 3 months

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Hey! I have a plan and a question as growing season gets closer and you're about the only Solarpunk person I feel comfortable asking this to, but for context, there's a park across the street from my apartments and they built a waterpark on part of it, but all the trucks and stuff left this large spot that collects and holds water pretty often I want to plant some semi-wetland wildflowers there, but my main concern is the plants getting mowed down once they start growing. Is there anything you think I could do to stop it?

👀👀 oh shit I’m The Solarpunk Gardener now

I haven’t done a lot of guerrilla gardening so I can’t speak from personal experience but I would think there’s a handful of things you could do to prevent mowing, mostly by making the area look as Intentional and Official as possible. This could likely include things like

- Making a sign. Something to name the garden, something like ‘abcxyz park wildflower garden’ or something to make it seem official or at least notable.

- Surround it with stones, I guess like paver stones or just Large Rocks. Or just in general something to signal ‘don’t mow here’ like wood beams or something. I doubt someone on a riding lawnmower or a push mower would dedicate the time to push/move it all aside (unless directly told to) and would instead just skirt around it. It could help if you added mulch as well maybe? They also sell like little short fences/borders and edging at places like Lowes or Home Depot that could maybe work too

- If you’re feeling funky maybe you could make a walking path through it? Make it look even more Intentional and Official. I think that would make it a Several Night Operation instead of just a one night thing, but it would make it look official and encourage people to enjoy the space. I’m thinking a path made of like. Pebbles or something at this point.

That’s all I can think of at the moment. Maybe if anyone else has ideas, they can chime in?

Best of luck on your project! Rooting for you!

#out of queue #ani rambles #answered asks #fantasy2reality-things-blog #gardening #guerrilla gardening #solarpunk #i hope this is helpful!!!#if you do it would you consider planting a milkweed in my honor #swamp milkweed might do well maybe #(this is not an obligation do what you want)

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wetcatspellcaster · 4 months

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Hi! Sorry to bother you again, I'm the one who asked you a while ago if it was okay to ask for some tips on writing dialogue. Thank you so much for your availability and time 🙇‍♀️ I'm mostly curious about how you structure your dialogues and how you manage to build chemistry between the characters through banter. Do you follow a particular set of rules or does it just come natural to you? You write so many ideas and cool dialogues, how do you manage to come up with so many? In general, if you have any tips for a fledgling "writer", they are super welcome. No pressure, of course, I really don't want to intrude/steal your time. P.s. I forgot last time to tell you that I also really loved your AU fic, Party Favours. I was hooked from the first lines and I had so much fun reading it. It was a really comforting and entertaining read, like drinking a hot chocolate in winter. Honestly, thank you so much for gifting us with such a warm and funny story. 🥰☕

Hey! Thank you for being so nice about my writing and the strengths you think I have - I didn't know I had them, so it was interesting to see my work from someone else's perspective.

And also don't worry, it's not a bother to answer this question. Although I'm not sure how helpful I'll be as I have no formal training and that might mean my explanations aren't useful!!

I'll try to answer as best I can :)

I don't really have rules for chemistry, I'll be honest, but my favourite dynamic (as is fucking obvious from many a fic I've written) is overconfident flirt/straight-laced practical killjoy. Luckily for me... there are a lot of these in media (Howl/Sophie, Tamaki/Haruhi, certain flavours of Buffy/Spike, Jude/Cardan from The Cruel Prince, Labyrinth fanfiction, whatever was going on with Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries)! So I guess, if I was to give advice on that... I'd say if you really like a certain dynamic, go and look for examples of how they work elsewhere. Work out what it is about the pairing that makes your brain itch, or examine how these characteristic interactions play out, if there's any kind of formula to them - for instance, in Party Favours, the bit where Astarion is actively and overconfidently faking while talking to Threnn while Rose gets more and more flustered, was based partly on a fake relationship episode of Buffy lol. Like I didn't copy it word for word or anything, but it was an idea I saw elsewhere that I knew would be good for the pairing. .

Coming up with ideas... again, idk how idiosyncratic my process is. I maladaptive daydream a lot, and I really like scripting arguments (see above about what dynamics in fiction work for me, lmfao). i just love to hallucinate bickering, apparently. If I have any lines of dialogue that occur to me in any situation, I tend to put them into my notes app on my phone, to revisit later. If I have a scene with a particular purpose, I might look through my dialogue on my phone and try to find a series of quotes that work. Other times the maladaptive daydream for a few days might be the scene, and I'll write down any notes on what I want to happen and let it percolate for a few days before I actually write it. Sometimes pieces of dialogue will come to me before the scene does - Astarion's speech in chapter 7 of pieces happened before any of the rest of the fic, and then I was like "fuck. well. now i've got to get myself there." Mostly, this seems to just be a result of having these people live in my head rent free, but I'm also pretty autistic and so I script conversations a lot in social interactions anyway. .

Dialogue. I think dialogue comes naturally to me (see above comment about autism) and as such, I don't really follow any strict rules, I'm afraid... but these are some things I do formally try to do-

If a person is talking at someone (again, see how much I fucking love writing people bickering), you need to make sure it's not just a wall of text. Adding in paragraph breaks, even if it's a monologue, is kind of essential (speaking as someone who did not do this in the beginning, and it shows, particularly when you're reading my earlier fic on mobile rather than desktop). Often I will break it up with a one sentence interjection, a false start from the other person trying to get a word in edgeways, or a stage direction. I had a problem with one pairing I wrote for where one of the characters just would never speak... I needed to engineer lines for him to say even if it was completely superfluous. Sometimes, now I look at my writing, I feel like these are obviously fake and unnecessary... but they help break up the text and give the reader pauses. So they must be helpful, even if they're kind of just... there. it makes the dialogue a dialogue, with two people involved and reacting to each other. -

Similarly, speeding stuff up can be useful when creating banter, to keep pace and avoid people monologuing at each other. The key ways I tend to speed stuff up is usually a) characters finishing each other's sentences (derogatory or affectionate), b) interrupting each other (you'll notice my repeated 'Astarion-' is often used to get Astarion to just talk quicker and at more length and in more detail until Rose loses her goddamn mind), c) quicker back and forth where you don't need dialogue tags or stage directions bc characteristic voices will make it clear who is speaking. -

I read everything aloud as I post. This is how I proofread. Reading aloud helps me find spelling errors/sentence errors, but it also means that I have to speak all my dialogue aloud to my own wall like a crazy person. If I'm speaking it aloud in a different way, like the phrasing changes subconsciously to what's more natural in my mouth, I will often edit the dialogue to reflect that. I speak it, to see how it is spoken. -

Second to the above point, if you have a character who's voice you struggle with, listen/watch clips of their voice. I do not think I can write Lae'zel (or Gale tbh, and I'm now writing a whole fic from his pov so I clearly hate myself). I watch back clips of them all the time, and then I go to my dialogue, and see if I can hear it in their voice. If I can, I keep it. -

...Be brave enough to tell jokes. I genuinely can't tell you how much I don't think I'm funny. Every joke I write in my fic, I have no idea if anyone else will enjoy it, or if it only makes me laugh. But I put it in there, for me. I'm lucky, bc now some people tell me they found a joke amusing, and I'll know it landed with someone else other than me. But you tell jokes with your friends, presumably, and you're playful with them. So allow your characters to joke with each other, even if you're scared that no one else will 'get it'. If no one else finds it funny, at least the characters are having fun! -

Anyway, those are my main 'tips', I don't know if any of them are helpful!!

My other one main piece of advice is... read. Seriously. Even if the media you want to write for isn't a literary novel, read other people's writing, and I do mean both fic and published books, because published books (if they're good) have an editor. I read a lot of books/webtoons/manga before I ever wrote a fic... like for 12 years or something. I was a big reader, and reading good writing is useful - it's inspiring, it's also just technically helpful. These writing tips might be useless, because lot of what I've done in my own writing I've learned through osmosis - just by reading a fuck tonne of books, good and bad. I'm not saying you have to read 60 books a year or w/e, but read like, a few good books!

(also, just write a bunch. I am only becoming a 'read' fic author on my 11th project??? basically??? so I've had a lot of practice at this point, and grown in confidence. The more things you finish, the more ambitious you get. I couldn't have conceived of Pieces when I was writing my first fanfic, bc I thought plot was my main weakness... now I'm writing an almost entirely original premise and that's bc I've learned a lot since I started writing!)

#asks #i hope this is helpful!!!#lovely words from lovely people #long posts #emma rambles #my writing #personal #honestly... a lot of my advice boils down to 'my brain does things i thought were normal until it took a therapist exactly 18 minutes-#-to diagnose me'#also the way all the formatting got lost is sending me

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fencecollapsed · 6 months

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Hi from the Severance fandom! Read your fic, and now I'm hella curious about getting into the Hatchetfield 'verse— Where do I start? Can I possibly get a short "what to expect" primer for a complete noob? Thank you for your time if you answer this, but please don't feel obligated <3

— @enbygesserit (I'm a sideblog and don't like having my main visible in asks)

hi!! I saw your comment and meant to reply but I wasn't quite sure what to say so this is perfect actually!

so! Hatchetfield is a horror-comedy anthology theater series following the people of the titular town of Hatchetfield as they face various threats and horrors and eldritch gods. there's no one lead, lots of characters show up multiple times, and they dip their toes into a lot of genres with each story - one set of stories gets pretty sci-fi with the company a few of the lead characters work at experimenting on them without them knowing (which is part of why I drew a connection to Severance). tones between stories also range from fully absurd to more serious

most everything they've done so far is available on YouTube! there are three professionally-filmed stage musicals, and two seasons of short story script readings they did during the heights of Covid

since it's an anthology and there's no strict timeline of events, you don't necessarily have to watch it all in chronological release order, but that is my personal recommendation anyway

you'll want to start with The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals, which is a body-snatcher type alien invasion story (and features the characters in my fic)

then Black Friday, a national disaster story about mall riots influenced by a cosmically powerful doll that everyone wants

then there are twelve Nightmare Time stories, narrated and performed by the director and cast over zoom. the format's a little tough to get into at the start but it improves overtime, season two is much higher quality than season one

and just last month they released the third musical, Nerdy Prudes Must Die, about the vengeful ghost of a dead bully coming back to kill nerds

#i hope this is helpful!!!#i just woke up hi hello #there is an unofficial nightmare time story they read during a fundraising livestream as well #its a little more of a hassle to access djsskd i recommend not worrying about that one for now #you can come back and ask me about it if you decide youre interested #into the mailbox #anonymous #enbygesserit #hatchetfield

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idonthaveanyurlideas · 1 year

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sorry if this has been asked before but i'd love to know your process for creating animatics. not only are they so incredibly fluid and perfect to the music but they're COLORED! absolutely inspiring. i'd love to know what you do for planning and editing, basically how to put an animatic together in general. i use procreate to make art but other than that i'm completely clueless on how to make animatics

ooooh okay i would LOVE to tell you!!!! So first things first I will say that my animatic process is probably not the most like. Efficient way to do it. I'm not an artistic expert and I'm very self-taught so this is just what I've come up with over the years with the resources I had.

This has ended up VERY long so I'm sticking a read more in

All that to say I have two main programs that I use, one to draw (Medibang Paint Pro) and one to put the frames together for my animatics (Davinci Resolve). These days, I have both of these programs on my laptop so I have everything on one device. Before I had my current laptop, I used Medibang Paint on my iPad and iMovie on my laptop, but the overall process is basically the same.

So. I have five main stages of making an animatic once I have a song and a character/narrative in mind.

Stage 0 is arguably the most important stage, which is deciding it's something I for real want to do. Making an animatic is a big commitment, so it has to be something im 100% on board with or I'll get bored before I finish it. So usually when I hear a song and I think "oh I can apply that to x character" I'll have to listen to that song on repeat for at least a few weeks just to iron out the story in my head, decide what moment I'm going to put with each lyric, basically plot out the narrative internally.

This stage is a bit different for every animatic. For some of them, like the Snackrifice as an example, I heard the song for the very first time and went: i know EXACTLY how this is going to go and then I went home and started planning it out immediately. Others, like Aequitas Aug, I had the song as a vague "oh this is Coin vibes" for months before Expansion Era ended and I finally knew I had all the material I would need for a full cohesive narrative. And then a bit longer to really decide "okay so the redactions are going to be at this point, the semicentennial will be at This moment" and so on.

I have a whole playlist full of songs that I COULD make into animatics that I vibe to on a regular basis, basically marinating them until I have enough content and ideas to start actually planning them out into an animatic.

Stage 1 is scripting it out: I write out all the lyrics of the song, count up how many beats correspond to each line, and plan out what I'm going to do with each section. As an example here's a portion of my script for Miguel's first animatic Autoignition. As you can see my script is often pretty loose and jokey at myself, because I already kinda know what I want it to look like by the time I start scripting it, this is just to get it down for pacing and to fill in any gaps.

[Image ID: Screenshot of white writing on a dark background. There are eight lines, alternating between bolded writing to signify planned action, and regular writing to signify the lyrics of the song Everybody Loves Me by OneRepublic. Line 1, in bold: Uh oh Zack is fallin into fire and hell and disintegrating ur gonna earn that content warning. Line 2, regular: And you don't have to make a Line 3: Miguel left alone at edge of Solarium :) fire everywhere :) big f Line 4: Sound 'Cause they got what you Line 5: Miguel falls to her knees for a moment, stunned. Line 6: Need. What you need Line 7: Then he runs away Line 8: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh /end ID]

Stage 2 I do my actual draft. I do every frame as a very quick sketch. This stage is where I put all my frames into Divinci Resolve and match it all up to the beats of the song. I work out my timings, I figure out if I need to add/delete frames somewhere. The majority of the fiddly work happens here in terms of lining it all up to the music. All the frames look about as basic as this lmao the idea is Quick and To the point so i get can idea of what I'm working with. Very often I'll have figures in this draft stage where, as an example, I know I'll need to put players from the Flowers or the Dale from a certain point in time, but I haven't decided exactly who yet, so they're just vague humanoid blobs.

[Image ID: A very basic sketch with black lines on a white background, showing two figures facing away from the camera with loose lines showing the ground exploding in the distance. /end ID]

Stage 3 is Lineart, and this stage takes the longest because I'm actually doing the proper drawings for everything. I don't do colouring yet, because this stage takes so Long and I prefer to do my colouring all in one go so I can keep it consistent. it also allows me to catch any errors that I might make in my Lineart because I get to go over it again when I colour. This is where I make my final decisions on who all the extra characters are that show up that don't Really need to be there.

When it comes to deciding Who Gets To Appear in the Animatic, there are a few tiers.

Characters that NEED to be there for plot/emotional reasons (think like Nagomi Mcdaniel appearing in Alaynabella because Layna switched with her for the Shadows)

Characters that I want to put in there for theme reasons (think Luis Acevedo in Hall Stars, I included them as a cameo because they were later incinerated and the whole animatic was about incinerated players)

Characters that I like/my friends like (Esme and Howell making appearances at the start of Aequitas Aug)

Characters that are just easier to draw, depending on how many times I have to draw them and how tired I am at the time (when in doubt, I tend to default to humanoid characters with reasonably simple designs. If I'm like 400 frames in on Aequitas Aug and I have to choose between horse person Winnie Hess and regular human Eizabeth Guerra to help represent the Breath Mints getting got, I'm gonna go with Eizabeth even if Winnie is technically more iconic and recognisable.)

[Image ID: Lineart of a digital drawing showing Miguel James and Zack Sanders as humans, facing away from the camera and looking towards the ground exploding in the distance. Miguel is kneeling on the ground while Zack is standing. /end ID]

And so of course Stage 4 is Colour. I add in the colours, any lighting effects, all the extra fun bits.

My colouring is USUALLY pretty basic, to save time and effort. For colours that I tend to reuse a lot (typically sunbeams uniforms and the main colours for the various beams) I have them saved in my paint app so I can access them easily. For other players I've drawn before I usually have to bring up one of my previous drawings to reference the colours. Backgrounds are the bane of my existence and as thus are usually kept as simple as possible, and lighting is typically something I use sparingly. Basically, I take as many shortcuts as I possibly can to save my sanity.

[Image ID: The above picture but with basic colour. The background is a pale orange. There are some lighting effects on the explosion. /end ID]

And voila! Off to Youtube. Like I said above, I'm sure this isn't the quote unquote 'Best' way to do it. But it works for me, and doing it in these stages give me a fun little progress video to look back on when I'm slogging through the lineart stage.

It's definitely really tedious at times, and keeping up the motivation to do hundreds of frames three times in a row can be really difficult (especially with a full time job) but it's definitely sooooo exciting when I finally finish. I publish all the draft and lineart videos on youtube as well as unlisted videos, and its always fun to look back on them to see the difference between the draft and the final finished product.

Most of all though, it took me AGES to get to the point of animatic making where I am now. My very first animatics for Dimension 20 were SO different to what I do now, and I was very lucky for a while to have a lot of free time to focus on doing it a lot. My VERY first animatic wasn't even set to a song. It was from a Fantasy High clip, and i never got past the draft stage for it.

The other part of animatic making that I had to start taking really seriously was character design credit. For Quite a while, I did not include credits for designs of players that I did not create. It wasn't until Aequitas Aug (which had an OBSCENE number of players) that I realised what a massive oversight that was. Nowadays I have a big spreadsheet that lists every Blaseball player that has ever appeared in my animatics and the creator of the design that I used/riffed off of if I could narrow it down to one or two. For some players its trickier, often because their design was consistent over multiple artists or I couldn't be sure what the origin was, but I do my best to be as accurate as possible. If you're looking to make some blaseball animatics, I totally encourage you to do so, but I would advise getting on top of credits sooner rather than later! It's so much easier to add in new characters and their designers now as I find them rather than trying to backtrack and remember exactly which picture on the wiki I took inspiration from, along with it being a lot more respectful to all the other amazing artists in the fandom.

Overall, animatics are a lot of effort, but they're soooo worth it. If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me, I love to talk about my animatics and my process.

#ask #my art #animatics #long post #i hope this is helpful!!!#legitimately feel free to ask me more questions or send me a dm #i love to talk about myself and my work

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sapphicsupremacist · 2 years

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Ohh you're vegan?? Do you have any recommendations for non-dairy stuff from the grocery store that doesn't have almonds?? I'm not vegan, my immune system just does what it wants, and right now I'm really enjoying the So Delicious coconut-based ice creams

Oh I sure do!!

For milk I use Oat Dream because I find it's best in tea, but regular soy milk for baking. You can also make you own oat milk really really easily and get the consistency/taste you want (plus it costs virtually nothing... just oats and water)

The best yoghurt I've had is Riviera brand oat-based (the coconut is good too, I'm just an oat girly). Silk is also good (and cheaper)

If you're Canadian and have President's Choice at your grocery stores they have a really good block of vegan butter that's great especially for baking

Violife and Earth Island are generally really great brands for cheese and cheese-related products. They're a bit pricey, but very good imo! If you ever need really fancy cheeses for some reason, Fauxmagerie Zengarry and Nuts for Cheese (both cashew-based) are incredible BUT ridiculously expensive

And finally, avoid Daiya products!! Almost every Daiya product I've tried has tasted pretty bad. Some people like it, but the general consensus is that it sucks

#I hope this is helpful!!!#if you need any more recs or reviews feel free to ask! I try a lot of different things so I've got a good idea of what's out there #cakesexuality #asks

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hansoeii · 9 months

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look at you, you're gorgeous!

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callisteios · 1 month

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i made a character uquiz. i 100% promise you that you will get a character you know AND like

#that's my guarentee #ignore the quiz description #features some of my favourite characters. eg. ianthe tridentarius. jaws. sonny!dog day afternoon. nicolas cage. kendall roy. hope this help #im not going to tag every fandom that's rude #uquiz #quiz #personality quiz #mine #i don't know why i put the sport question i hate the sport question.#wasted like half a day asking stupid questions like 'do we think vriska serqet would prefer football or hockey'

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tizzymcwizzy · 1 year

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this is a poster i made for my call to action assignment in humanities! it's a bunch of basic and easy stretches for people who sit and work at a desk all day (me)

the idea is that you'd put the poster up above ur desk and do the stretches every 30 minutes or so,, the whole routine won't take more than about 6 minutes to complete and when done regularly it can prevent wrist, shoulder, neck and back pain! :)

all these stretches can be done while sitting (although i HIGHLY recommend you stand up and move around while taking a break from working)

you can get a free digital copy of this poster here on my gumroad!

and you can order a print/poster here from my inprnt!

#i mostly made this for me but i hope it can help other people too!#also thinking about maybe putting this on smth like gumroad so people can download a high quality pdf to print themselves #lmk if anyone would be interested in that 👀#my art #artists on tumblr #stretches #edit: this post popped off okay‚ also a lot of people expressed interest so i made a gumroad! maybe ill put other stuff there thatd be cool

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stil-lindigo · 2 months

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Ahmed Saad or @/90-ghost's brother in law is currently doing his best to organise the evacuation of his family from Gaza. This family suffers from a combination of ailments that all require medical attention. This is the description on their GFM page:

Hello, I hope you all are doing well!

My name is Mohamed Monir Ahmad Mahmoud, I’m a hemophilia patient from Gaza. I decided to start this campaign with all the hope that you could support me in evacuating Gaza to do surgery for me and my daughter and start a fresh life with my 5 kids out of the ongoing genocide in Gaza [...] I was supposed to go out at the end of 2023 to have surgery on my knees but since 7 October, I had no chance due to the procedures on Rafah crossing, the gate of Gazans to the world. Now, my knees and elbows are bleeding with no access to any type of care and if things stand as they are in Gaza, I won’t be able to walk or make any effort because of the bleeding (currently I am barely able to set up a small fire in front of the tent to prepare food for my kids).

What I ask is 60,000, for travel costs because each one would need to pay 5,000-8,000$ to be allowed to leave Gaza through Rafah crossing and we need around 3000$ more in Egypt for our stay and to obtain visas. We will be heading to Brazil where my brother Diaa lives and there is a huge chance to do the surgeries and access health care as the health care for Hemophilia patients in Brazil is one of the most advanced in the world.

please give generously!!

#theyre only at a fraction through their progress #after ahmed's success story getting his money #i hope tumblr can muster up enough generosity to help these folks out too #palestine #free palestine #free rafah #free gaza #rafah #mutual aid #donations

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everchased · 1 year

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can someone please get these hoes under control i'm BUSY

#gun cw #it's EVERY 5 HOURS AT LEAST #AND THEY STAY UP???? LIKE NONE OF THE ONES I'VE REPORTED HAVE BEEN DEACTIVATED #GO AWAY #anyways...#my art #edit: everyone who says i look like [insert anime guy here] has holes in their brain hope this helps some of u figure out what's wrong

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rhinestonesox · 10 days

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When Senshi was young in the dungeon the majority of the adults he were with ostracized him. All except Gillin, who died to make sure Senshi had something to eat: unseasoned boiled meat that may or may not have been one of their comrades.

It really puts into perspective why he was so nurturing towards Chilchuck. When Chil reveals he’s 28 to the party, Senshi responds by telling him that he thought he was older. Senshi was in his 30s when he and his comrades got trapped in the dungeon, so it’s safe to assume that he thought Chil was at a similar age.

He met a young boy who was, from his perspective, forced to do dangerous work in the dungeon just like he was, and so, Senshi made an effort to look after Chilchuck in the same way Gillin looked after him.

Mind you, when Senshi was young in the dungeon he had to starve for weeks, eat the horse he loved, and finish it off spending the next i don’t know how many years wondering if he committed cannibalism.

Senshi understands first hand the value of nutrition and proper eating, so when he’s with the party he makes an effort to make sure they’re all eating a full and balanced diet. Not only that, but Senshi INVOLVES them in the process of getting food to eat, always preparing it in front of them and narrating every ingredient in the process so that there’s no doubt about what they’re eating.

#i woke up in the middle of the night to write this and haven’t proof read so i seriously hope it’s coherent lmaoooo #dungeon meshi spoilers #delicious in dungeon spoilers #senshi #dungeon meshi #everyone jokes about senshi giving chilchuck the talk but he’s literally just trying to take care of a young boy who needs help #i’m crying #and sobbing #and punching the air

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applestruda · 5 months

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Starry Sleepover

First ever dtiys! Celebrating 1 year here!

Rules below!

No deadline!

Feel free to use my designs or your own

You can change up the composition as you want, but keep the main vibes of sleepover, stars, and Boatem (don't remove folks)

You can use any form of art for this dtiys (writers included!!)

Use the #BeeBoatemDtiys tag, and if you want you can optionally @ me

If you have any questions ask away! Other than that have fun :]

#gaahhh #i hope this is fun #anyways #pearlescentmoon #pearlecentmoon fanart #mumbo jumbo #mumbo jumbo fanart #grian #grian fanart #impulsesv #impulsesv fanart #goodtimeswithscar #gtws fanart #hermitcraft #hermitcraft fanart #boatem #my art #BeeBoatemDtiys #thanks for word help zera <333

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triona-tribblescore · 12 days

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I WANNA DRAAWW!! RAHHHGG!! Absolutely swamped with college work, im so tired TT (hence whatever tf this is lmao)

#posted this doodle on twitter yesterday but it's still very relevant today #fr cant do anything until I get 12 posters drawn make my homemade paper and finish/publish my 200 page book I'm gonna-#Send help #i miss being active sm :'((#SORRY TO THE 60+ ASKS IN MY INBOX I PROMISE ILL GET TO YOU SOON <333 #anyway I hope everyone else is doing ok #sending love #(also husk please- stay off the internet lmao)#angel dust #angel dust fanart #husk #husk fanart #huskerdust #huskerdust fanart #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanart #tribbleart #<3

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andthebeanstalk · 11 months

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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