#i hate april fools this is the extent of what i will do for it <3

[spoolesofthread]

happy april fools a bunch of my fc turned themselves into lalafells with bonus oops all tanks shot

#caveat: boy on the far left was already a lala #(not everyone pictured but this is who was on yesterday) #c: senah amariiyo #r: cute fc #sadie plays ffxiv #i hate april fools this is the extent of what i will do for it <3 #also senah is the little purple dancer/gnb on the right

[wataksampingan]

Spoilers for Ep 69 COZ OF COURSE I'M SCREAMING (as well as Ep 70 and beyond coz I apparently hate myself and spoiled myself on Naver Webtoon. Again.)

It's a SUPREMELY interesting choice of translation in that scene where Theo has to pretend he knows how to behave like a normal loving husband. The English line the translator chose is "Isn't that right, Pereshati?"

Which is fine, coz 1) he doesn't call her anything different, and 2) this is a far more subtle shift - Theo only says her name in highlighted moments (e.g. when he fell off the bed, when he noticed her a little unsettled by his ferocity in the last chapter). Otherwise, his dialogue doesn't use her name at all. So this is him trying to emphasise their closeness... by using her full name (Lord love you Therdeo Lapileon, you hopeless dork)

However. In the original hangul, he outright calls her 부인 (buin) - 'wife'. Just to hammer in the awkwardness of "HI YES HELLO WE ARE EXTREMELY MARRIED, YES THIS IS MY TRUE, LEGIT WIFE, NOTHING ELSE GOING ON HERE" (the Webtoon comment that called him "an underrated comedy king" should be one of the top comments of the YEAR coz it's truer than we could've ever hoped)

Anyway, in modern usage(?) apparently its considered impolite to refer to your own wife as "buin" (someone better versed in Korean, please enlighten me)? It's more appropriately used to refer to another person's wife. But technically speaking, MILAOWM is set in some... 18th-19th century world so I would argue it could be okay to use...?

It's possible that it could be an equivalent to the way "madam" was used in the Regency era when men would and did call their own wives "madam". It was considered a proper term of address back then so I can only suppose "부인" in this regard can act the same way. But, I also recognise it would be a pain in the ass to translate it as "isn't that right, madam?" and then have the entire fanbase go berserk over why he's calling her something we mostly recognise as a formal term for strangers these days.

The... unofficial, let's say, translation went with "isn't that right honey?" which, while it would have achieved the same effect as 부인on the readership, also isn't quite the most accurate read on the line.

Literally speaking, the translation would have been: "Right, wife?"

...which would have been hilarious, but also WAY too close to Borat and just... undermines his dignity as a ML, possibly to irreparable extents (maybe? I don't think I would have minded coz there is really no fooling us at this point: Theo can do cool things if he puts his mind to it, but his default is Socially Awkward)

But because I'm biased: just you wait, Perry. We're all waiting with you for the time he smiles at you with his whole heart and you MELT - JUST WAIT.

Anyway, I thought that was just interesting and just makes me determined to keep Google Translating my way through the Naver versions. Also reading it on Naver is how I found the April Fool's 4koma and let's not go there coz I'm already thoroughly distracted.

The hand holding is just icing on the cake. Theo shattered me into pieces for a variety of reasons, but the hand holding is just *chef's kiss*. At this point, this is all progress on Theo's part ("if it's Pereshati, it's okay also I'm in love but no one say anything about that yet") it'll be another long wait until she figures out that she's fallen for him (so we hope) We are all Vicountess Otiz at this point.

We are also all Gloria Lapileon. MADAM. YOUR GRACE, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING.

That determined LOOK on her face in Episode 70 after she sort of denies Daniel a chance to play Cupid since Theo clearly hasn't made any progress in wooing Perry. That is the expression of a Grandmother with A Plan to Help Her Awkward Grandson Win the Hand of the Fair Lady who Saved Her Great Grandson/Family. I know she's been given the idiot ball to hold this whole time with regards to her own family and their household, but I love this matriarch and I wish her every success.

Meanwhile, the other current love of my life, Pereshati - is so tired of shenanigans and having to worry about so many people. I'm crying. She literally mutters to herself, "Why am I surrounded by weak* men?" and the bodyguard nearby, in utter shock, thinks to himself 'd-does she mean even the Grand Duke?'

[*the 'weak' here can refer to physically weak in hangul]

Just to preempt the "PERESHATI DON'T BE MEAN" comments, look at this from her perspective:

Count Jahardt: been sickly most of her adult life

Theo Lapileon: has just recovered from seizures, severe blood loss and a 3 day coma, and is honestly more fragile than he lets on

Adeus Potson: has been hurt twice, looks like a puff of air could blow him over

Celphius Lapileon: probably not included in her list, but he's still a wee babby, also full of toxic blood, and must be protected at all times

She's just so tired, guys. Exhausted by everything. Men, essentially (the women are also exhausting but they're not as fragile).

Also she doesn't have the full picture of the kind of demons Theo has been fighting/Adeus' true motives (though that is about to come SHOOTING OUT THE LEFT GATE) so we'll see how this shakes out eventually if/when she finds everything out.

I am not ready for Ep 75 being the season 1 finale. Truly I am Not Ready, but it must be done of course. I don't know how seungu is doing but I hope they're able to rest and recuperate and take care of themselves so this series can continue fucking me up being lovely and the target of my current obsession.

Shout out to Islette and Phineas - please let this father-daughter side relationship be given a spin-off/side stories coz poor Islette has been subjected, undoubtedly, to Phineas' unceasing tutoring coz he's a well-meaning worrywart and probably wants her to get up to the level of literacy she should have at her age (regardless of the trauma) and I just want to see how Phineas learns and grows to become the most whipped papa in the world

Honestly: who run this world? Girls.

(Okay, girls AND Marvin and Celphi, coz that map foreshadowing is heavy; why is Schwartz not considered a vassal state of Castor, despite having been defeated recently? HMMM.)

#MILAOWM #my in laws are obsessed with me #my in-laws are obsessed with me #unhealthy rambling of a diseased mind #translation is a fascinating art #do your best Grand Duke #you're fighting some Tall odds #but you can get there #MILAOWM episode reactions #spoilers #MILAOWM spoilers

[diavolosthots]

I loooove Lucifer’s wings. I have to confess, I think I have a wing kink. It’s not spicy but can I have mc just kinda... out of the blue stroking his feathers, straightening them out? I suppose it could be preening but it’s just more of wanting to snuggle into those wings. If you’d like to make it spicy you can.

On another note thank you for writing so much requests. It must be overwhelming at times and honestly I don’t know how you do it. But please know that I greatly appreciate all that you do for the part of this fandom that is good. Happy writing, Your Majesty! :D

Supernatural awakened my wing!kink so I totally get this haha. It IS overwhelming at times and college is stressing me out right now so I have to cut down on writing way more than I would like to 😩 i hate it. Thank you so much, darling ❤

Warning: slight NSFW at the end-ish

A Demon's Wings (LUCIFER X GN!READER)

(Shoutout if you realized that that GIF is from supernatural's Michael lol the irony)

He should’ve known better than to trust his brothers on April fools. Millennia of experience should have warned him that they wouldn’t miss him, and they sure as hell wouldn’t go easy on him, but to mess with his wings? To tamper with the strongest but also simultaneously the weakest part of his demonic anatomy? That’s just a low blow. To say Lucifer was pissed is an understatement. Even after he washed all the honey off his feathers and got them back to a resemblance of what they used to be, he couldn’t help but sit under a dark cloud. He felt humiliated and to a certain extent, betrayed. Never had they ever gone for his wings, and at this point, he would’ve rather have them go for his horns. You see, an angel’s wings are their most precious parts and although Lucifer isn’t an angel anymore, he still cherishes his wings. They bring him both sadness and confidence. They’re beautiful and he knows it, and although they’re not what they used to be, he uses them as a reminder that he has withstood even the darkest of days. 

Right now, he has allowed himself a moment on his bed, stomach down with his head resting on his crossed arms. It’s an unusual sight, indeed, but after making sure the door was covered in several spells and magic that only the strongest demon could undo, he allowed himself to let his guard down. Every once in a while, and by that I mean around once a century, he lets himself just be. His natural form is out, wings spread wide across his sheets as relaxation slowly creeps through his body. Sometimes he likes to put some music on, like today. Classical, of course. The fireplace is burning and the room is dimmed to a soft light; some might think this to be a romantic setting, except that Lucifer had no one to share it with. “Lucifer?” or so he thought. Your sweet voice rang through the door, which was slowly opening. His whole body tensed, eyes growing wide momentarily as he watched you slip in. He supposes he forgot that although the magic would ward off other demons, only a locked door would keep a curious human such as yourself out. He should’ve known you would come to check up on him, too. You always do; always worried about his well being. 

He barely had time to stand up before you made your presence known in his room. “(Y/N)...” Your eyes immediately landed on his wings, worry and awe shining in them, or so he believes. It’s odd, really. Not that you were concerned, of course, no. You always worried about him and he finds it endearing more often than not. “Are… Are they okay?” You carefully approached him, scared that he will just turn away or change into his more human form to keep you away, to keep you at arm’s length, but he did neither of that. He stood still. “They’re fine.” he didn’t mean to sound so harsh, but your genuine interest in them, especially after that prank, has him on guard. You, however, were just fascinated by them. They were gorgeous and fit him so well. You love the look of them and how seemingly soft they are, although you didn’t really know the latter for sure. 

“I’m sorry i… I just wanted to check on you. They’re still snickering and laughing about the incident but I figured… they may have gone a little too far.” Lucifer’s still watching you cautiously, although he finds mild amusement in your current state of worry. “I had nothing to do with it, by the way… I knew they were planning something. I’m sorry. I should have told you.” “Is that why you came here? To apologize?” He’s tense. You never gave him a reason not to trust him and he’s trying to remember that, but his wings are precious to him and he’s scared of anything else happening to them. “Yes… I feel awful. I thought they may dump water over your head, or trip you down the stairs. I never thought they’d go for your most precious part.” The minute those words left your mouth, you could feel your face heat up, eyes wide as you looked at Lucifer. “I-I mean… I’m assuming that they’re pretty precious…” 

Lucifer let out a soft sigh, turning around to make some tea for the two of you because you won’t be leaving again until you tell him everything about that prank, “tell me, Darling, what e---!” But before he could, your hand hand raked through his feathers, causing him to tense up again, a deep blush creeping across his face. “(Y/N).” He tried to sound stern, he tried to not let his composure falter, and he certainly tried to avoid pushing his wings back into your hand for more. “S-Sorry… I just.. They’re… wow…” once again your hand was in his feathers, feeling through the softness of them although you took note of the strong bone structure in them; they were nothing to mess with. Lucifer shuddered at the touch, quickly turning around to face you and grab your arm, holding it up, “Don’t… I won’t be able to hold back once you start.” 

The truth is, wings are sensitive. Wings can have certain…. Effects on their wearers. Touching his wings is intimate, not to be taken lightly, and he’s not sure you understand the severity of what you’re doing. “Then don’t.” Or maybe you do and you’re just a fool. Your hands are itching to get back into his feathers, Lucifer could tell, and in some way, it’s making it even harder to say no. He craves touch more than anything, more than he would like to admit, but he craves your touch the most. Slowly, he brought your hand up to his face, leaning his cheek against it before placing a loving kiss to your wrist. “You don’t know what you’re saying, Darling.” He managed a soft smile. As much as he would love for you both to explore each other so deeply, he’s scared you won’t be able to handle it, or worse, that he will lose complete control. “But I do… I found a book… about an angel’s wings. I know you’re a demon now, but you were an angel once too… please…. I want this.”

His eyes were fixated on yours, staring at you for what seemed like eternity while he weighed the pros and cons in his mind. “Take your clothes off.” It was a bold statement, yes, but he hoped you would just follow his orders. He let go of your hand, moving past you to lock the door completely and then cast an extra spell on it, turning back around to see you had started on it. Your shirt was thrown somewhere and your pants began to be unbuckled, but before they could fall as well, he moved over in two long strides, cupping your face in his gloved hands to place a deep kiss against your lips, his wings slowly, carefully moving inward to brush over your naked arms. Your hands moved back into his feathers and Lucifer took in a sharp breath, his lips against yours becoming more bruising in a head-turning kiss. “You won’t be ab--” “I know, Lucifer, I know.” your eyes searched his, nothing of love and adoration for him shown within them. Your fingers danced on his black feathers and your eyes landed on them with a smile, “please.”  

Lucifer took a deep breath, gently pushing you down on his bed before getting to work on his own clothes, his lower sets of wings dropping down, yearning for more of your touch, “then tonight, I will make you mine.” 

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me headcanons #obey me scenarios #lucifer x mc #lucifer obey me #obey me lucifer #shall we date lucifer #lucifer avatar of pride #obey me lucifer x reader #wing!kink

[pebblysand]

[APRIL ‘22] - THE LIFE/WRITING UPDATE NO ONE ASKED FOR (AND SOME QUICK LINKS)

it’s april! yay! to start off as a disclaimer, please note that i’m not a “fun” person ( have one stock “fun fact” that i recycle every time i am asked to give one), and i hate april fool’s day, so there are no pranks, no fake shit that you have to weed through, in this post. call me boring, idc, i am! i liked april fool’s day as a child because in france, all you have to do is draw fish on paper and then tape it to people’s backs without them realising - and that is the extent of it! clear expectations, clear deliveries! i can’t be arsed to come up with pranks and fun shit, i’m not that creative, people 😆. 

Anyway, before diving into more life/writing updates, here are some quick links to different blog pages you might not see on mobile :

FIC MASTERLIST 

FIC RECS [updated]

WRITING ADVICE [updated]

ORIGINAL PIECES 

OPINION PIECES & ASKS [updated]

FINANCIALLY SUPPORT MY WRITING  (thank you!)

[NOTE: i am currently not accepting prompts]

Castles (chap 11) ETA: aiming for the 8th of may. more on that below. 

links extended a/n-s: chapter v ; chapter vi & vii ; chapter viii ; chapter ix ; chapter x

[more life/writing updates under the cut]

WHAT I’M READING:

books:

i wrote a Very Irritated Rant about men explain things to me, which is the only book i read this month. find it here. 

i have however started my classic-of-the-year, which will be 1984. i’m in a rather post-apocalyptic mood at the moment, both in fanfic and otherwise, so this is really going great. i do think it can be a be tedious and almost too details on the inner workings of the government so far, but i am very much enjoying it. if you’re looking for a more “modern” classic, i would highly recommend!

fics:

i read: and whose army? by renaissance, this month, upon the recommendation of @incalculablepower and @uncontainedhybrid, and thoroughly enjoyed it. it’s a long one shot, which are always my favourite kind of stories, and the worldbuilding in it is unbelievable. it centres on anthony goldstein and exists in an au world where harry didn’t defeat voldemort in ‘98, though the reason behind that is never really explained. i think you will love this fic if you liked the squib or the fault in faulty manufacturing. imo, it’s a cross between the two, an au, rather dystopian reality of what the da would have been/evolved to be had harry not won the war when he did, but also centring on a character who is mostly unknown in the books, and whose entire life is sort of created from scratch by the author. the fic isn’t spotless (nothing ever is) but what i really liked about it was the characterisation of anthony goldstein. as an author, i find it incredibly hard to write characters who don’t necessarily have a “drive” and sort of float through life, and that is something that renaissance does impeccably well in this. would highly recommend! 

.

WHAT I’M WATCHING: 

i mean, i think at this point we all know what i’m watching. i’ve converted half the three broomsticks discord at this point, i’ve done weekly recaps, cannot stop posting gifs… i cannot believe that it’s only been a month and peaky is already almost at the end of the season, with only one episode to go on sunday. i’m so sad and excited and all of the feels, as i said in my last recap, it’s like i’m saying goodbye to that period of my 20s, and it’s incredibly emotional. i know this blog has sort of become a peaky blinders trainwreck at the moment so if you follow me because of my potter content, i truly apologise for the spam, i’m so happy you’re still here and i promise we will eventually go back to regular programming. just let me have this one one last time 🥺.

in other non-peaky news, i’ve started watching skins (which i’d never watched before, believe it or not, and which i am, unlike euphoria, very much enjoying). in terms of films, i went to see notre dame brule in the cinema when i was in france, which was really good and made me very emotional about, well, notre dame burning, and rewatched the wind that shakes the barley which is probably in my top five favourite films ever, and made me emotional about, well, the fact that i may have watched this film ten times and have never not cried in the same two moments (namely, the scene in the prison where they sing the national anthem and the scene at the end). cillian murphy is just absolutely incredible in it and i even named sinead in the fault in faulty manufacturing after sinead in that film. it’s like it’s all come full circle. 

i’ve also watched the tinder swindler, the crypto scam and the college application netflix documentaries, which were entertaining but otherwise kind of unremarkable. i fail to understand why the college application scandal is such a big thing since all university education is paying in the us anyway, like, of course if you pay more, you’ll get in, it doesn’t shock me much, within the sphere of ruthless capitalism, but whatever. the crypto people had it coming, imo, and the tinder swindler women, i mean … i hate that they’re being blamed but also if you need to be told not to lend 30,000 quid to a complete rando, i wonder how you’ve managed to make it this far in life, you know?

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WHAT I’M LISTENING TO:

i’m really enjoying maisie peters at the moment. very gen z, but i really like her vibe and her lyrics are incredible. 

in terms of podcasts, i wanted to mention that the what page are you on? podcast did a really good episode on booktok (the book side of tiktok) back in february (bit late to the party, i know). i generally love this podcast because it chats about books, but also both the hosts have worked in publishing and a lot of their work is about demystifying the way publishing works. i thought their take on the “newness” of booktok, and talking about how “old” books forgotten by published are now resurfacing there, how these booktok influencers are very enthusiastic about books but can be ignored by the industry because they don’t necessarily know how publishing works, was very interesting and refreshing. i personally obviously use tiktok a lot, but just like 70% of their userbase (that’s at least the last number i heard), i only watch videos, i don’t make any. i’ve spoken before about my interest in tiktok and booktok, but also my reluctance to put my face onto my content, especially in a way that is so public. i wish i couldn’t give a fuck what my friends, strangers, or potential employers, thought about my fandom activities, but i actually do, and i know how much that shit can hurt you irl. part of me wish i could engage in the tiktok discourse (especially on fanfic, etc.) but i am chicken. chicken is me. but regardless, the episode was super interesting and i would highly recommend it to you. 

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WHAT I’M WRITING:

THE FAULT IN FAULTY MANUFACTURING IS OUT!!! seriously, you guys have been so lovely and so supportive with this fic, i honestly can’t believe it. i originally thought no one was going to read a 27,000 words fic about seamus finnigan, let alone enjoy it, but your feedback has been truly incredible, thank you. i put so much love and effort into this fic and i’m so very glad you liked it. your comments have meant the world to me!

regarding castles, i’m now entering what i’m referring to as my “april writing rush.” i would like to write and finish the next chapter by the end of the month, and hopefully post the second weekend of may. fingers crossed. i’m sure i’ll post more about it as i go along, haha. 

more generally, though, i’ve kind of come to accept that: castles will be done when it is done. and, that’s okay. what i mean by that is that i think towards the end of 2021, i had this urge to just finishitfinishitfinishit because i felt like i’d been writing it for so long, and was like, there’s no way people will stick with it for that long. i had this guilt in me that if i kept at the pace i was going, this fic wouldn’t be finished until 2023, and that, in my head, was just unacceptable. and that no one would be that patient. but the truth is that: 

people might not stick around, and that’s kind of okay. new people will come. whatever. that’s life. that’s not a reason to put so much pressure on myself, on top of my full-time job, life, etc. it’s not my job, it’s a hobby.

i was very quick and regular in my early updates because we were in lockdown, and i was unemployed. this schedule of updating once a month/every six weeks (and the guilt associated with not maintaining it) is unsustainable with a full-time life. i need to take time off to relax for myself as well, and whilst i function better when i do a writing “rush” when i hyper-focus on something and only on that for a few weeks and Get It Done, i also need to recuperate after that, and often that time is also a few weeks/month. those chapters range in the 10k-20k range and that ish just Takes Time, whichever way you look at it. 

i’m someone who is generally very project-oriented, so i have this urge to Finish Castles so that i can move on to the next thing. i don’t like switching between projects because a) i always fear that i will never finish the thing i put to the side and b)  i feel a lot of loyalty to the project i’m working on and feel like i’m cheating if i’m writing something else. but i think looking back, writing the fault in faulty manufacturing has actually very much changed my perspective on this. writing one shots and other stories is fun. writing castles is also fun. i’m allowed to go back and forth without feeling like i’m committing a crime. i took three months off castles but i did write something else, and that’s okay too. 

so, i think, from now on, i’ll probably alternate between working on castles and something else. i don’t think i would have the brainspace to have multiple long projects going at the same time, but i’ll probably write more one shots like the fault in faulty manufacturing at a more regular pace in the future. strangely, i’ve also find this helps me writing castles because when i come back to it now, i’m much more excited about it, and actually miss it. i see things like editing and plotholes and storylines way more clearly, and whilst getting back into and getting the castles “voice” back can take a bit longer than if i hadn’t been away from it, the break actually helps a lot in the long run. so, for now, that’s the plan :). 

i would still like to finish castles before august 2023, as this is my 30th birthday and i don’t know, i think that’d be cool, but honestly, we’ll see. no rush. sorry if you were hoping for a more regular schedule, but your girl needs her sweet time lol. 

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WHAT I’M DOING:

i’ve realised earlier that i’ve now been doing these monthly posts for a year. and looking at were i was this time last year, i was So Miserable. my mum had her stroke, i was alone in paris stressing about exams i didn’t want to take, i wasn’t sure i’d make it back to ireland, it was just - let’s just say my mental health was not at its best. and i don’t want to say i’m in the Best Place Possible now, and i still worry and struggle with a lot of things, but in comparison, god, my life has improved So Much this past year. i’ve found my groove with writing, i’m happy with where i live, i’m happy with my job and while i do still feel lonely at times, and still wonder wtf i’m doing with my life sometimes, overall, i’m in such a better place. i think a lot of that has to do with the slow but steady gradual bettering of the pandemic, but even further, i think i’ve grown to accept a lot of things that have improved my life greatly. this is all a bit soppy, i suppose, but overall, i’m pretty happy. 

lastly, one thing i wanted to mention (cause i’d spoken about it a while back) was to talk about my very first real writing class went! and, honestly, the teacher was great, and i learnt a lot but i think that a) i was in the middle of intensely writing the fault in faulty manufacturing, which wasn’t really something i could speak about in class, but which was also greatly hindering the amount of time i could spend on “homework” and honestly, it was just a bit of bad timing. additionally, b) i think these classes just aren’t for me. i have a panic-level anxiety at the idea of reading things in public (as a kid i found it really hard to read aloud and was kind of ridiculed because of it, and that kind of shit sticks) and reading my stuff out loud to an audience just gives me so much anxiety, it’s not worth it. i genuinely think that if i ever became a proper writer and had to do public readings, i’d have to do therapy beforehand or something. i’d love to have a writing group where we could, like, send each other our work before, and then discuss during the session, but that does not seem to be a model that exists, so i just think these aren’t for me. i get so anxious, it’s all i think about in class haha. but, it was good to try at least once!

anyway, i think that will be all for now,  

lots of love, 

pebblysand. 

#monthly post #april 22

[hetamavi]

Is America and England’s Relationship Romantic?

Introduction

For this analysis, I’ll be determining whether or not there’s anything romantic between America and England. In doing so, I’ll go into the potential for canonization and tie things into how romance in general is handled in Hetalia.

Because America and England have different perspectives, it’s easier to break things down by giving them each their own section. England will be covered first, followed by America, and then there’ll be a paragraph over whether or not it’s likely they’ll ever get in a canon relationship. Credit for these translated panels goes to Hetarchive. 

England’s Crush

England’s side is the less ambiguous side. He’s attracted to America.

Before getting to the strips used for evidence of that claim, his broader behavior will be covered. Nothing about this broader behavior is overtly romantic, but it’s something that can be contextualized by the evidence of romantic feelings presented afterwards. The way he usually acts may not be explicitly romantic, but it is influenced by those kinds of feelings.

When England makes his first major appearance in the manga, his character is established through him harshly criticizing America’s plan against the Axis. Contrasting him with America is used to get across what kind of personality England has and also emphasizes their relationship as an important one. This is also how he’s later introduced in World Stars. Throughout the series, he insults America, teases him, and is over-the-top in criticizing things like his films. It’s not always unwarranted, but that doesn’t make it any less true that antagonizing America is something England seems eager to do at every opportunity he gets.

But antagonism isn’t all that he throws America’s way. America is on the receiving end of some of England’s harshest behavior. But when England is ready to put his pride aside and be at his most vulnerable, it’s usually when America is involved. When England thinks there’s an opening for him and America to grow even a little closer, he’s going to take that opportunity. He’s opened up to America about how hard the Fourth of July is on him, he was clearly touched over America offering to share his rations with him, he attempted to spend his “dying” moments telling him how he actually feels about him, he offered to be his friend instead of a whale…the list goes on.

America isn’t unique in being attacked by England. He also isn’t unique when it comes to getting to see England’s more vulnerable side. But he is unique in that both of these sides of England are aimed at him frequently and intensely. England will rip apart an American film to the extent that his behavior is funnier than insulting. He’ll also come running with Valentine’s Day chocolate when a third party tells him America wanted some from him. England wants attention and affection from America. And he wants it to an extent he’d be embarrassed to admit to. That mixes together with the fact that though England likes to insult America as being childish, he actually isn’t entirely above America’s antics and America often brings out that side of him where he doesn’t want to try so hard to be a mature adult.

England is fiercely protective of his pride. He doesn’t want to be hurt by rejection and he likes feeling mature in comparison to America. But his own wild side thrives off of America’s energy, especially when he’s feeling competitive, and he wants to be closer to him.This leads to a pattern of him usually being antagonistic towards America up until he thinks America would accept his honest feelings in which case, he becomes more honest and vulnerable. With that brief overview of England’s overall attitude towards America covered, it’s time to contextualize that behavior with evidence that the feelings England usually tries so hard to hide are romantic feelings. The first thing I’m going to bring up is, probably not surprisingly, Buon San Valentino. In Buon San Valentino, alongside the main plot that was taking place with Germany and Italy’s relationship, England was given his own short side-story that touched upon his romantic life.

This is the number one moment that’ll get brought up in any discussion around UsUk in canon and for good reason. This moment is canon confirmation of England’s crush. The counterargument someone might bring up is that Valentine’s Day isn’t always between lovers, but that argument doesn’t hold up well at all here. First, this is a side-plot to a larger plot concerning Germany believing Italy is in love with him. It’s an explicitly romantic plot where the only other notable deviations from it are concerning Hungary and Austria’s relationship and Prussia being lonely before overhearing Austria looking for a book on comforting Germans who have failed at romance. If this interaction were meant to be platonic, Himaruya would have done something to indicate that’s the case to distinguish it from that larger plot. He didn’t do that. Instead, England shows up blushing and stuttering to give America chocolate. Second of all, years later in another strip on Valentine’s Day, Himaruya described his understanding of European and American Valentine’s Day as being mainly between lovers, a description that matches up with how he portrayed the holiday in BSV.

The next strip is also really explicit in expressing England’s attraction towards America. This is a scene from the 2011 April Fools Day Event.

Not much to add on here. America was blackmailed into wearing a very provocative outfit. England responded by awkwardly complimenting him. Judging by the motion lines next to his outstretched arm and America pulling back, he might also be grabbing at the apron.

The last strip I’ll go into is “The Long-Deep Awaited Emotion is Ruined”. Explaining jokes aren’t fun, but it’s necessary here. Near-death love confessions are a very common trope. This scene initially seems to be playing that trope straight, England starts by admitting he doesn’t hate America. He then tries to say something else, something that seems much more significant. The build-up is there, but England is cut off before America can hear him out to the end. Then comes the subversion of expectations which are the heart of the joke. Instead of being upset, America celebrates England’s death knowing it’ll wake him back up. All the tension that was previously there is instantly gone.

This scene was absolutely meant to be an attempted love confession. All the build-up matches that of a love confession. Death swooping in to shut England up before he can say anything that’ll shake up the status quo of the series matches up with a love confession. The entire joke is that it looks like a classic death bed love confession up until expectations are deliberately subverted. Romance isn’t at the forefront of their relationship or anywhere near it for that matter. But England has had moments where he’s made it clear his feelings go beyond their usual platonic interactions. If he thinks America is initiating something romantic with him (Buon San Valentino), he’s ready to reciprocate. If America is in a revealing outfit (April Fools Day 2011), England is probably taking in the view. And if England has nothing else to lose (The Long-Awaited Deep Emotion is Ruined), he’s going to at least try to tell America what his real feelings are - even though maintaining the status quo of the series won’t let him. Aside from these moments, since he’s often not willing to be honest in what he wants, these feelings are a large part of why he swings back and forth between constantly antagonizing America and showing his softer side in hopes of becoming closer to him.

America’s Ambiguous Feelings

Now that I’ve laid out the evidence showing that England is attracted to America, it’s time to go into America’s perspective. Or, in the context of romance and England, his lack of a given perspective. To an extent, America’s behavior parallels England’s. Instead of being overly critical and grumpy towards England, he teases him. He makes comments towards him that will get him riled up, prank calls him, and comes up with schemes to get him to do what he wants -even if those schemes get England angry- instead of being more honest with him.

Also like England, he clearly cares for the other. And he cares a lot. He chose England above everyone else to pair up with for his Halloween costume contest, England was listed as one of only two friends of his in an early character description of America, and as much as he complains about having to help England home when he’s drunk, he still does it.

Here’s where a major difference is. Not only is America comparatively lacking in moments where he completely drops the teasing in order to be honest with his feelings, he’ll deflate emotionally heavy moments that England initiates. If England is ready to open up about his feelings, America is ready to shoot him down and laugh things off. A few examples include America shooting down England’s friendship offer, responding to England’s complaints of being cold with “I won’t do anything for you”, pretending to be happy about England dying so he’d wake back up. This combines with how his usual tactless behavior is used to obfuscate his actual feelings like what happened with the costume contest.

Bringing this all back around to the romance part of their relationship, it’s hard to tell where America stands. There’s not really any concrete evidence that he likes England back and he doesn’t engage with England’s more forward moments.

There is some evidence he might not think of England as attractive.

When France brought him to a cafe, one that he didn’t give America any details on, he seemed uncomfortable. He also didn’t seem to appreciate the pass England made at him in the 2011 April Fools Day event. However, in both of these situations, it’s more likely that it was the revealing outfits making him uncomfortable and not that it was England involved in those situations. 

The one thing that can be concluded is that he’s aware of England’s feelings. Running back through the strips brought up with England, there’s evidence of that much. He didn’t react all that much to England making a pass at him in his waiter outfit. The comment he made didn’t seem to surprise America at all. It just made an already uncomfortable situation more uncomfortable. He also didn’t seem curious as to what England was trying to say before he was cut off by the Grim Reaper which implies he’s already well aware of where England was going. Once England was back up, he didn’t push the subject at all. And him knowing makes sense. America is not as oblivious as he often acts, as shown in his interaction with Canada brought up earlier where he privately acknowledged Canada’s feelings and that, to a lot of people, his own personality makes him difficult to get along with. He’s very much capable of reading the atmosphere and picking up on the feelings of others even if his behavior doesn’t always reflect that. 

There are various plausible interpretations over why America has never directly acknowledged England’s feelings. Maybe he doesn’t feel the same and doesn’t want to hurt his feelings. Maybe he reciprocates, but something else is holding him back from doing anything about it like not feeling ready for a relationship. Whatever his reasoning is, anything I could come up with would just be an interpretation and nothing that can be concretely proven.

That’s the non meta way of seeing America’s perspective anyway.

Why UsUk (Or Any Other Ship) Probably Won’t be Canonized

Let’s take a moment to focus on Hungary. In a series with a by far mostly male cast, Hungary was the first female character and she remains as likely the most popular female character from the series. It’s a status matching the panel time, development given to her, and how long she’s been a part of the series. And there’s a trait that she, again the first major female character, was given.

Hungary really likes cute boys. Not just cute boys as individuals, but cute boys being sexually involved with each other as well. So much so, that she was willing to wait out France assaulting Austria for a bit so she could watch. Hungary is meant to be an audience surrogate in this way. She’s a fujoshi. Hetalia doesn’t really qualify as a BL manga, but it definitely falls into the category of manga that focuses on a mostly male cast, has a lot of fanservice, and there is a lot of potential for romance when it comes to several of the male-male relationships. This is something Hima is very conscious of. The series is not at all lacking in opportunities to see the male cast undressed and there’s even a strip where he recommends “My Neighbor Yaoi-Chan” to readers. Whether or not he’s familiar with the BL genre, he definitely seems to be familiar with its audience.

So maybe this might make the conclusion in the title of this section seem wrong. If Hima is knowingly doing things that appeal to people into BL and the category of manga previously mentioned, then wouldn’t it make sense that it’s likely UsUk and/or another ship could be canonized? Actually, no. The interactions between America and England aren’t meant to seriously build up to a relationship upgrade, they’re supposed to show that the potential exists. The way this is often done in other works is by being really heavy with subtext without any confirmations, but Himaruya seems to have a trend of confirming things on one side of a relationship, but never having the other side respond to those feelings or even acknowledge them. This is not just true for UsUk. It’s true for GerIta and SuFin as well. The former even has an unresolved potential childhood love backstory (something that fans are no closer to getting closure on over ten years after Buon San Valentino was made) while the latter had Sweden’s feelings for Finland directly confirmed by Himaruya. There’s an importance to never crossing the line into relationship territory and that importance is that it would take control out of the hands of fans. The more obvious way in which this would happen is not everybody would like the pairings he’d go with and are instead invested in other pairings involving the same characters. It’s likely that many fans would even drop the series over this depending on how invested they are in shipping. The other reason involves the shippers of the canonized pairing. People who ship a certain don’t necessarily have the same vision for what a relationship between the characters would look like and some fans get very invested in their specific take. By not canonizing any pairings, fans can iron out the details themselves instead of potentially being disappointed. Contrary to what one’s intuition might be on appeasing this kind of audience, lesser is better.

Back to UsUk specifically, it’s not that America’s behavior couldn’t be explained with in character reasoning. It absolutely could. But that lack of response exists within a broader pattern of teasing relationships that never go anywhere. This is something I’d love for Himaruya to prove me wrong on when/if he returns from his hiatus. But unless that surprising turn of events happens, this is why UsUk (or any other ship) won’t be canon.

I’ll end this section with this picture.

Here, you can see that England is using part of America’s uniform as a pillow, a clearly intimate gesture. We know England wanted to use the uniform. He wouldn’t have it if he didn’t. But how did he end up with it? Did America give it to him? Did he toss it to the side and England took it? This question, where America’s feelings are relevant, isn’t something Himaruya is going to answer. Fans are left to come up with their own answer, the answer that makes them the happiest. 

Conclusion

There’s enough evidence within the text to conclude England has romantic feelings for America. Buon San Valentino confirmed that much and there are other moments to back that up coupled with a fixation on America that manifests in a mix of grumpy, over-the-top critical behavior and vulnerable, openly affection-craving behavior. America, on the other hand, is more ambiguous. He parallels England in some ways in that he clearly wants the other’s attention, but usually doesn’t go about it in the most honest way. But unlike England, there’s no concrete evidence showing romantic feelings on his part. Even though England has feelings for America, those feelings are unlikely to ever be fully acknowledged in the text itself. The way the series goes about romantic relationships is by indicating there are romantic feelings on one side, opening up the possibility for a relationship but never actually delivering anything beyond the possibility. This makes it unlikely the two will ever get into a relationship.

#hetalia #usuk #aph england #aph america #hws england #hws america

[btsandvmin]

The BTS boys are obviously aware of shipping. Do you think it bothers them? I’m always curious as to whether they’ve ever talked about it? And whether it makes them uncomfortable.

I mean, they are aware and also encourage it to a certain extent with the fanservice culture that they have when it comes to idols. Of course that doesn’t mean they can’t also have times when they find it too much or annoying with shipping. We also know they joke about being couples and other things pretty freely, so personally I don’t think they are too bothered by it generally speaking.

But they also avoid questions about relationships and at least some members seem to try hard not to be shipped with women and doing things like “polite hands” or not interacting openly despite knowing each other etc.

Basically I think it can bother them at certain times or when it becomes too much in a way where it actually effects them. For example when shippers call their close ones to find information or post sexual content for BTS to see etc. (Why we should stop shipping comments/content in vlives, weverse under their posts etc). But I think it’s a question of certain behavior from shippers bothering them rather than being shipped in general.

I don’t think they have ever talked about shipping, but we have Tae’s comment to a Tae/kooker telling him to dream about JK where he told them to “get out of their imagination”. On the other hand we also have them coming up with and using “ship names” for their combinations and I don’t think they are dumb enough to not understand how some fans view it when they combine their names at this point. We also have things like Jimin posting a fake article about Jin and Namjoon dating on april fool’s and other times when they joke about relationships between them. So yeah, I think they don’t mind it too much as long as it doesn’t go too far and personally affect them in some form. 

As with everything it is difficult to guess their feelings about something with only the limited view we have of BTS, and even more so since it’s not a subject they would likely talk about. But at least if I guess I think they are mostly used to it and fine with it and sometimes even have fun with fanservice. Most shippers are also aware it’s a fantasy, so the bigger problem is those that actually go from being shippers to being believers who have intrusive behavior.

Of course it can also be different from person to person how they feel about it, and how much they might be aware of it or avoid it. It could also change over time. In the end from what little we have seen I think they are aware and accept it, and sometimes will play with it and at other times feel bothered by it depending on what fans do towards them directly. Same as how they might get accused or labeled by many but probably ignore the majority of hate as long as it doesn’t reach them and affect them more closely. For example being asked about plagiarism during a press conference will likely affect them more than a rumor spread on twitter. Every example of how they might feel can depend on how they get exposed to it.

It’s a sensitive subject, especially to fans very much against shipping, but I also don’t think BTS would feed too much into something they definitely hated. Not to mention I think they have a lot more problems that are bigger and makes them more uncomfortable or annoyed than shipping. Thanks for the ask.

#bts #shipping #bts shipping #btsandvmin #Btsandvmin ask #Btsandvmin answer

[morethanwords0475]

April TC Challenge!

It was so nice reading everyone's answers for this challenge! Thank you guys so much ��

Day 1: Happy April Fool’s! Have you ever pranked your TC; if so, how did they react?

I’ve never done it myself but we have as a class, someone once suggested that we stay absolutely silent during T’s lesson. He made us discuss in pairs and we all started writing on paper, typing on computers, using made-up sign language, etc. T got a bit frustrated and said he’d make us write an essay if we continued, which scared me because I hate seeing him upset. We got a bit scared as well and eventually all broke out in laughter (we didn't even last 10 minutes lmao), he lightened up again and said he initially wondered what he did to make us mad at him, which I thought was adorable.

Day 2: What is the earliest thing you can remember about your TC?

The first thing I remember is seeing his name on my friend’s timetable on the first day of the year he came to our school, and not knowing how to pronounce it because I’d never seen it before. I really can’t remember my first impression of him as a person, though, it was years before he started teaching me.

Day 3: Do you like your TC’s subject? Do you consider yourself to be good at it?

I do like English to an extent, I find it fascinating, and I have gotten very good at it, but none of it felt natural if that makes sense? My love for other subjects like science is intuitive and I am naturally good at it, but I had to fight really hard for English because of T.

Although I did get a top-of-the-class grade for a test some time near the end of the year before I got him as a teacher, so maybe I was already kind of decent at it, but let's just say the first half a year of being in love with T was torture because English was so hard for me.

Day 4: How do you feel about your age gap?

Ngl I have had quite a few TCs and my age gap with T is in the middle of that range. As for age gaps in general, yes I do wish we didn’t have this canyon time in between us that I could never cross, and I wish I didn’t feel so immature and like a child compared to my TCs, but it is, naturally, what gives the unique traits of these crushes. Even though I don’t love T because he is older, him being older means he is more sophisticated and wise and moral and has his life together, which I do love. These experiences wouldn’t really be what they are without the age gap, and I’m learning to sort of appreciate that.

Day 5: Have you ever said anything to your TC that showed you favoured them? Have they said anything like that to you?

Umm I guess that time when S was supporting me for an application, I actually originally asked T but he was already supporting someone else, and he later asked me if I found another teacher so I said S. He was like ah and smiled… AND I JOKED THAT S WAS "the second best choice", second to him. It was clearly a joke but I did mean it. As for the other way around, he has said before that I am one of the best in the year so there’s that.

Day 6: Have you ever noticed any small habits that they have? If so, what comes to mind first?

Spinning his pen in his hand while he's working (it’s actually very impressive to watch and very hot), biting the end of his pen, and wrapping his leg around the table leg sometimes when he's sitting on top of one of the empty tables.

Day 7: What gift would you really like to be able to give them, regardless of if it’s realistic or not?

Before I knew he was leaving this year I wanted to give him a collection of poems I had written for him when I graduate, since he has helped me in my poetry writing, but now that can’t happen. I would also love to give him something related to any texts he taught us in English but ik it won’t mean as much to him as it does to me.

Day 8: Does your TC ever talk about what it was like when they were still a student?

Yes, T likes to incorporate his own experiences into his teaching which I absolutely love. He often mentioned not being good at science subjects back in school, which is a bit sad because I like the sciences and I am good at it, but it’s also cute to think that there are things he doesn’t know or can’t do. I also just love being reminded that he is still a real person, with real relationships and real pasts.

Day 9: Does your TC have a significant other? If so, what do you know about them and how do you feel about them?

Okay I might have written this question just to gush about S oops-

T and S really have a beautiful relationship, I love seeing them together (she teaches at our school too btw in case anyone hasn’t heard me gushing about her). S and I basically have the same first name, so I think she was always aware of my existence even though she didn’t teach our class a lot. We got to an actual 'know each other' stage a year ago, since then I would greet her if I see her around school and hope she remembers me. Then there was the application she helped me with some months ago, which really got us closer and she gave me so much support.

S is such an inspiration to me, she is so strong and so kind, and she stands for a lot of the things I believe in. I haven’t seen her in forever since we’re online or talked, I'm afraid I might never see her again :,(

Day 10: What is the longest time you have gone without seeing them?

If online learning doesn’t count as "seeing them", then it would be the online learning period when the pandemic first broke out in 2020. If we don’t go back to school soon, then this will be the longest, which absolutely sucks since it’s so close to T leaving.

Day 11: What do other people usually think about them?

People who have never been taught by him find him a bit scary (as I also did in the past), but his students usually really like him as a teacher and we all recognise how well he teaches - a bit too much that I can get jealous sometimes lol.

Day 12: Do you often make up excuses to speak to them? What kinds of excuses do you like to use?

Lmaoo all the time, it’s usually asking for help on English or the essay he’s mentoring me on or poetry and stuff. Once I even went to him after school to ask for lined paper because he gave us the choice of hand-writing or typing a homework and I wanted to make the point to him that I was hand-writing it like he wanted.

Day 13: Other than the subject they teach, what are they really passionate about?

I think sports and history are the main ones. He also really likes watching films and has somewhat strong political views.

Day 14: What is a skill you really wish your TC had?

PLAYING THE GUITAR it suits his style so well!!! Also I play guitar so I imagine us playing the same song together and-

Day 15: Which MBTI personality do you think they are? (If you don't do MBTI, which Hogwarts House do you think they would be in?)

I get ENTJ vibes based on the break down of the four categories, but some of the general traits attributed to ENTJs don’t fit. Maybe ESTJ.

As for Houses, he said himself that he’s probably a Ravenclaw with some Gryffindor, which was exactly what I had guessed before asking him that question (so proud smh).

Day 16: If you could go back in time and choose, would you still choose to develop feelings for your TC?

Definitely. This journey hasn’t been easy at all (especially now) but it is so rewarding. I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. I wouldn't even know what I would spend all my waking daylight thinking about if I wasn't in love with T that'd be so boring.

Day 17: If it was the last time you would ever be able to see your TC, what is one thing you would never leave without saying to them?

It feels terrible to answer this when the exact scenario is going to happen in two months… I have been vaguely planning out what I would say to T on the last day (debated over confessing or not), and as of now I just want to tell him how important he is to me and how much I admire him as a teacher, how much he has impacted my life, etc. etc. I need him to know that he matters to me.

It hurts a hundred times worse that all of this is contingent on us being able to return to school before the summer; I might not be able to see him again for the last time.

Day 18: When was the first time you cried because of them?

I must have mentioned before that I first realised he was a TC to me when he took us on a school trip abroad? We returned really late at night and were on the bus back from the airport, I sat quite close to his seat so I could see him, and I cried in the dark knowing that it was all going to be over soon. I still miss that trip to this day :,\

Day 19: How well do you think you know them?

I’m pretty good at remembering things about him and he has told us and revealed to us a lot in the past two and a half years, so I would say I know him quite well. Still not really on a personal level, though.

Day 20: Do you ever lie to them? About what?

We rarely talk about things that would require me to lie to him? Like I’ve never missed any work so I never had to make excuses, and he never questions things that might have been suspicious because of my feelings. The only time I could think of is when he was helping with my poetry writing and I was writing a poem for S - I had to say it was inspired by a TV show because I was using female pronouns lol. 

Day 21: What is the longest time you have spent together with them?

That day when we came back from the school trip he took us on - the day after I realised I liked him, I was around him for almost the entire day (12+ hours) and it was so nice ;-;

What I actually had in mind while writing this question though was a year ago today, we were in school and I spent four hours with him to help lead an event for his after school activity. We felt more like equals then and I loved feeling like he trusted and relied on me. How can it be a year already???

Day 22: If you have had other TCs in the past (or right now), how are they similar to or different from your current (or primary) TC?

I have a lot of ex-TCs so I’ll write about my current ones… Obviously there’s S, his wife, and surprisingly they’re actually quite different people? I love hearing about their differences and at the same time being reminded of how in love they are. They do share a common interest in sport (among other things of course) and similar values.

L and K are both quite different to T; L mostly because of the subjects she teaches and her bold, vibrant energy, and K mostly because of his sensitive nature and dramatic personality. T is never as strict or unpredictable as K and K is never as commanding and organised, but their subjects do overlap considerably and T sometimes teaches us terminology I learnt from K.

Day 23: Have you ever seen your TC in clothes they don’t usually wear? Casual clothes if they usually wear formal attire or the other way around?

T always wore suits in school, even in online learning. We had a few non-uniform days in the past when T would dress in casual clothes, and I always loved it because he looked so real - a normal, alive human being just like us. I have also bumped into him outside of school a few times and seen him in his own clothes. On days with sporting events (and, this year, every week on the day he taught us phys ed) he would wear our school's uniforms for phys ed teachers. I especially love seeing him in a particular blue hoodie, it makes him look about ten years younger 🥰

Day 24: When was the last time they made your heart thump?

On Friday when I was waiting for our one-on-one conversations about my progress in English. For some reason, the anticipation is always worse online, it was this way when I was waiting for results, for our meetings about my essay, even for normal English lessons. I was so nervous that time, and, it turned out, rightly so (see last update). But to be honest, any time I see him makes my heart beat.

Day 25: How do you think your TC would react if you confided in them when you felt sad or stressed or anxious?

I wonder about this all the time, especially after I confided in my ex-TC about my bad mental health (almost two years ago now). I am so tempted to find out with T, but whenever I get near that point something about his behaviour makes me think he won't react the way I want him to. Especially now that we are online, it is frustratingly hard. I imagine him being gentle and reassuring me and telling me that he believes in me, that he recognises my hard work and that I have always been good enough :,(

Day 26: What is the best dream you have had of them?

The most intimate dream I had was of T and I sitting side by side on a table, and his arm was surrounding my waist and I was leaning into him. I have also dreamt of holding his hand or him confessing to me (*cringes*). Sometimes it would be quite elaborate, us spending a lot of time together because of a school event or something, and those dreams are also really nice.

Day 27: What is the saddest/scariest dream you have had of them?

I have a lot more of these... Dreaming of him leaving usually hurts the most because I know it will happen soon. The scariest is probably that time when I dreamt that he was kidnapped and was going to die unless we find him in a very short time? The fear of losing him was very real. And then I performed an autopsy on him and held his heart in my hands lmao.

Day 28: Does your TC ever bring you up to other students/teachers that you know of?

Another English teacher told me that T would sometimes show her my essays because they were some of the best in our year group 🥰 There was also when T gave me a really special English award and the teacher who oversaw our year group came to congratulate me, saying T had mentioned it to him and had said that I was one of the best students he had ever taught. I am bawling from that memory.

Day 29: Do you see them as being a romantic person? Are you?

I am a very helpless romantic (as evident in this blog lmao) and I get the feeling that T is quite romantic as well. Not as badly as I am, of course, he is very much realistic and composed and mature, but just in the most everyday details. I feel so sure that he would do small gestures for S, arrange a surprise for her every now and then, value her above most other things, go out of his way to be around her,,

Day 30: How have they changed since you two first met? How have you changed?

I don't remember as much about T from when he first started teaching me, even less from when he first came to the school. In general, I think he has gotten much more comfortable with our class, and he is more assertive as a person and more involved in things within the school. As for me, apart from obviously being two years older and hopefully more mature/less obnoxious, loving T for this long has really led me to take joy in fighting for someone and be even more reliant on academic validation. I am more aware of my feelings because I grapple with them every day, and T has reinforced a lot of the values I held but wasn't as aware of. I've loved this journey so much I cannot believe it is coming to an end soon.

#tc #tc community #teacher crush #male tc #tc challenge #april tc challenge

[animaniachan]

Happy Belated April Fools!: A3! Camel Tenma Imagine

…yes, you’ve read the title right

…no, i don’t have that kind of fetish

…but also yes, i’ve also just wrote a 1.5k+ words imagine on a camel (in reality this took me about a week to fully figure out how to camel)

i would like to point out that none of this would’ve happened if not for the lovely @currywaifu for dragging me down into this hell. 99.9% of the credit for this imagine goes to you even though i am the one who wrote it. so i figured that since i’m already here, ima drag all of you down here with me ;)))

on that note, i would be opening imagine requests for this blog very soon but dear god not about tsundere animals, this is not in any way indicative of how the future writing projects on this blog are going to go…maybe.

anyways, prepare yourselves and enjoy…i guess

ao3 version: here

NIGHTMARE FUEL WARNING

—

“Mm…” your previous drowsy eyes were forced open to the bright sunlight beaming down at you. “...Where the hell am I and what am I doing here?” you glanced around, confusion clearly littered in your hues. What you are witnessing before you is a vast, open field of vibrant green with not much more to offer other than some lonely trees spread out in the distance.

You had no recollection whatsoever about your current situation. The last vivid memory you had was your visit with your celebrity, carrot-head boyfriend at the Mankai Dorms since today was the one time when he actually had a day off. “Seriously...where the hell is this place…?” Since there’s no point in simply standing around like an idiot, you’ve decided to explore this vast pool of greenery, hoping to discover at least some sort of clue.

However, your hopes to discover anything quickly dissipated as the field seemed like it was stretching infinitely with no clear signs of an end. It was at that moment that an indescribable sense of despair took control of your entire being and you hopelessly collapsed onto the green cushion below you.

In contrast to the beautiful scenery around you, your mood was like a wilted flower as you slowly scrunched your knees up and buried your head into them. You know that the waterworks would kick in very soon while your only wish at this point was to leave this mysterious hellhole so you can see your boyfriend again and jump into this arm for comfort and finally STOP this god forsaking nudging sensation on your head and, and…

Hm? Nudging?

You suddenly realized the gentle yet weighted sensation that would periodically brush against your head was not just your imagination playing tricks on you and was very real. Relief began filling in your wounds of despair as just the thought of another individual being here with you is more than enough comfort. You swiftly glanced up to the source of the contact in hopes of finally receiving the information you’ve been desiring for all this time.

However, the second you did so, all the thoughts that previously occupied your mind was sucked into a boundless black hole. The world seemed to stop flowing around you as you were met with the most gorgeous amethyst hues you’ve ever witnessed in your life. The sharp gazes pierced through you like arrows and it was then you noticed the long lashes that complemented those perfectly-shaped eyes. With a breath hitched in the middle of your throat,  you can’t help but be completely mesmerized by those crystal clear hues. Incidentally, at the same time, a strong sense of nostalgia emerged from the depth of you, they reminded you of someone, almost as if you’ve stared into the exact same hues before...somewhere…

At that point, you were so deep in thought that it resulted in you simply staring blankly back at the intense amethyst gaze. It wasn’t until you saw that they eventually broke contact with your own hues in a very awkward and uncomfortable fashion that you’ve realized you’ve been staring for much too longer than you had originally anticipated.

“Ah— I’m so sorry! That was very rude of me to stare! The truth is, I have no idea where this place is and was hoping that you could help me—” desperately trying to redeem yourself from the previous rudeness displayed, you bowed hectically like a maniac while asking for forgiveness. It wasn’t until you’ve glanced up again how large the figure of the individual actually was. The first to come into view was their abnormally long yet muscular legs, then it proceeded to a very broad yet protruding back, lastly you traced their body line all the way up to their long neck before finally receding back to those gorgeous amethysts which stood out amongst the pool of orange. “...What?”

T-This is what you think it is...or is it? As dumbfounded as you are by your recent discovery, your brain cells have somehow managed to process the identity of the individual before you. 

This is...a camel, right? What the hell is a camel doing in the middle of a meadow!? 

In contrast to your actual feelings, the orange beast seemed to think of your reaction to his figure a form of compliment, evident by how it arrogantly puffed its chest out and gave a good ol’ proud huff in response.

...I wasn’t praising you, that was all shock, you proud idiot… The phrase that floated into your mind was all too familiar since it was your go-to response to the occasional idiocy of a certain carrot-head actor. “I swear...just when I started to get hopeful again...why?” Today has been an emotional rollercoaster and just when you thought you’ve already made it down the first slope, there seemed to be an even larger second slope ahead. The dam that had previously managed to contain your tears previously broke down once again. Sorrowful sobs continuously escaped your lips and refused to cease as you vigorously tried to wipe away your tears.

However, what you didn’t realize was the flustered look the camel gave after seeing you suddenly resolve into tears as if it’s trying to say, “why did you suddenly start crying!? You were just fine a minute ago!” Your sudden outburst of emotions managed to put this camel into a panic frenzy as it desperately looked around as if attempting to find a source of comfort to calm you down. Though, its efforts were futile as the lack of resources around you could be comparable to a barren wasteland.

All that it can do now is look down hopelessly at your slumped state while having a mental battle with itself about the next course of action. Then, after having seemingly arrived at a viable solution, resolution flickered in its glittering amethyst orbs. After letting out a huffing sigh, the majestic orange beast lowered its lengthy neck to eye-level with you and leaned in as gentle as it can muster to be to not so much lick, but instead offer a gentle peck to your teary eyes with its furry snout.

Completely caught off guard by the action that is absolutely unbefitting of a camel, your overwhelming emotions came to a halt as you stared back at the animal, mouth agape. “You...what are you…?”

“Mrrorahhh…” To your question, the camel simply responded with incomprehensible camel noises. Of course, it was a camel, what did you even expect. However, somewhere, you felt, its emotions came through.

“Are you...perhaps telling me to stop crying?”

“Mrrorahh.” Once again, the camel cried as if to confirm your inquiry.

“Hehe, thanks. You’re right, crying’s not going to change anything,” honestly, you couldn’t believe that you were just comforted by a camel as you wiped away the last of the tears that streaked down your face. “You’re surprisingly a very smart and kind camel eh? There, there, thanks again.” Without thinking, you reached out and gave a few loving strokes on the animal’s head. Though, the second you’ve done so you felt it tense and freeze in place like a statue. Uh-oh, did I somehow offend it by petting it? Wait, can you even offend a camel in the first place? Oh god, whatever you do, just please don’t eat me… “S-sorry, I kind of just instinctively did that- huh?”

Of course, you’ve brought up your guards as soon as you detected the camel’s odd actions since you didn’t know and didn’t want to know what it could do to you if it went off a rampage. However, what happened next managed to send all common sense you’ve come to know in your life down a limitless black hole.

What you’ve witnessed was the animal before you once again averting those brilliant purples away from your own though this time, a deep shade of rosy pink was dyed across its entire face. T-This...this is what I think it is right? I never knew that camels were even capable of blushing… So you do learn something new everyday…

“Pfft...hahaha! What is this? You’re so adorable! Oh my god, I can’t- my stomach hurts!”

In response to your maniac laughter, the very same one you would use to make fun of a certain actor, you could’ve sworn the camel gave you a glare that suggested, “what the hell is so funny and don’t call me adorable!”

“Ahahaha...ha...you know, even though you’re a camel, you remind me a lot, like a lot of someone I know.” The camel whipped its gaze back towards you again at your nonchalant comment. It narrowed its perfectly shaped eyes and offered you the gentlest and kindest gaze as if it understood your words. And in response, as much as you hate to admit it, your heart definitely skipped a beat under those warm and kind eyes. What is this feeling…?

“-i, [Name], -ake up!”

No, this is a camel! There’s no way that I’m being captivated by a camel-!

“Wake up!”

Besides, even if I did feel this way, there’s no chance in hell since I already have Tenm-

“[NAME]!!”

Your eyes shot open almost as quickly as your body which basically catapulted upwards and resulted in painful contact with whatever it was that lurked above you. “Ow!”

“OW! What was that all about!?”

“Eh? Tenma…?” The first thing that descended in your field of vision was your orange-haired, multi-talented actor, and extreme tsundere boyfriend who was now holding his forehead in pain from the lovely headbutt that you’ve just offered him. Still not registering the full extent of the situation, you glanced around your surroundings in a daze before realizing that you’re in Tenma and Yuki’s room of the Mankai Dorm and that you’re currently laying on Tenma’s bed.

“Geez… I don’t know what to be more baffled by, the hardness of your head or the fact that you can fall asleep in a duration of a phone call.”

Ahh...so that’s what it is…

The second the puzzle pieces clicked into place, a new resolution was formed inside of you as you wordlessly leaped off your boyfriend’s bed and made your way out of his room.

“Oi, [Name], where are you going?” Not used to not hearing a familiar comeback from you, Tenma began to get worried as he hurriedly followed after your footsteps.

Meanwhile, your silent search finally came to an end as you found the one and only you were looking for in the living room, “hey, Tsuzuru-san?”

“Mm? What’s the matter, [Name]?”

“I have a request for the script of the next summer troupe show,” you stoically stated just as Tenma finally caught up to you.

“Oh? Well, let’s hear it.”

“...can you please cast Tenma as a camel for his next performance?”

“...huh?”

“WHY!?”

#thanks nathya #what have i even done #camel ten ten #is this how you camel? #animaniachan archives #a3! April Fools #a3! imagines #a3! scenarios #a3! #a3! game #act! addict! actors! #act addict actors #sumeragi tenma #tenma sumeragi #a3! tenma

[fank0ne]

ONE CHICAGO FINALES

MED:

The Marchexton (yeah, I did that) triangle. I'm so sad for April, I kinda felt it coming. It seems like she doesn't even wanna find an alternative method and that's totally understandable.

I didn't like Ethan reaction at the whole "I don't know if I want to have a baby". I mean, I personally don't think you can find a compromise on that topic, but what the hell Ethan, are you with her because you love her or because you want her to give you a bunch of little Chexton? And you give her an ultimatum? Fuck you, dawg! It's difficult to rationalize and I know it's not black or white, I get that, but still... I understand him, but I didn't like how he acted.

And if I side with April on that, I totally have to disagree for what she did later. I hate cheating, physically, mentally, whatever you got, I hate when people are dishonest about their feelings. I know she was trying to process the bad news and she feels like Ethan was not being supportive, I know Dr. Marcel is charming and all that, but these were not valid reasons for her to kiss Crockett. I'm sorry. You come clean, you tell your partner how you feel, you talk to him/her about what to do next, then you get to do whatever the fuck you want.

Daniel and Cece. Damn, seeing Dr. Charles cry broke my heart. His relationship with Cece is so adorable, though I have a feeling is not gonna last any longer. Cece is really sick, unfortunately. Oh, hi Robin! I'm now used to seeing Mekia on The Rookie, didn't think she would made an appearance on Med anymore.

Maggie and Ben. Ben wasn't actually dying! I wanna see their relationship improve, but I don't wanna see Maggie acting like a dumb fool who doesn't have a functioning brain. She needs to get it together and stop being unreasonable.

Manstead is over. Is it, though? I wanna make sure we're done with this nightmare of a relationship for good, I don't don't wanna be surprised at the end of this season.

"I have been so unfair to Will" well, I'm glad you realized that, Nat! It's funny to me that she was saying those things while Elsa was next to her and, you know, Elsa has a crush on Will (though she's still the gayest character on Med to me), allegedly.

"We aren't good for one another, all we do is hurt each other. (...) I feel free" wow William, took you long enough to understand that, but I guess we made it. I'm so glad he's the one who said those words and I'm pretty sure he really means them. He looked so at peace with this realisation, it really made me happy. My cute baby!

FIRE:

Stella. She had to make an accident to admit that she needed to slow down a little bit. I swear to God, seeing her all agitated at doing multitasking almost triggered my anxiety, I'm not even kidding.

Aw, Boden apologized to her. I love that he told her that he respects her and her potential and that he himself should've done better than this. It was cute.

Dawsey. Why the fuck did Gabby come back for? I still don't get it. I don't wanna be mean or anything, but that visit was totally uncalled for and pointless. What kind of closure is that? Just say you wanted to fuck one last time, don't try to come up with fake deep excuses. I don't know, it was good to see Monica again (God, that woman is so gorgeous, it's unfair), but Gabby could've stayed in Puerto Rico.

Ouch, I saw Sylvie's bummed face and god do I know that feeling! I'm still not 100% sure about Brettsey (mostly because Matt doesn't seem to know what he really wants yet), but we'll see.

Thank you Matt for mentioning Antonio! It seems like he's the only one who hasn't forgot about him. Yes, I'm being super petty.

Gallo and Ritter. Unless they show me who tf Ritter's boyfriend is, I'm still going to believe it's/ship him with Blake.

Crotis forever! I'm so glad they're still talking about Brian and not acting like he wasn't an important part of 51. His friendship with Joe is one of the best things on the show.

Severide. That lady at OFI... sis has taste, that's all I can say. I wish Kelly would explicitly mention that he has a girlfriend so that woman (I'm sorry, I didn't get her name) would know what boundaries she shouldn't overstep.

The last scene... can you give this man a break? Just when he has a little taste of tranquility in his life, boom!, something happens. I love drama, though, so I'm digging whatever is coming, for sure.

PD:

That Buzerk convo... what tf was that? Awkward, almost cringe-worthy. Yikes.

Jay's undercover name has changed. Goodbye Ryan, say hello to Jim!

"Jay's going through a few things" when isn't he, though? Drama is his second name.

I know he wasn't thinking straight and he wanted to come clean for whatever reason, but, damn, he's so stupid sometimes. Of course Angela was gonna rat him out/want him dead if he told her he's a cop - the one who basiclly got his husband killed.

Hailey. I loved her. I absolutely adore how she's got Jay's back no matter what and, damn, the fact that he was kidnapped really got to her. She was pissed, worried, angry... we've never seen her like this, at least not to this extents! I actually liked to see Adam comfort her. I totally ship Upstead (like, I would literally die for them), but I like the fact that Adam is still somebody she can rely on.

I swear to god, when she broke that cup a shard went into her eye, I SAW IT. How come she's not blind?!

I kinda missed seeing Voight beat the shit outta people in that cage. It was nice to witness it again. LOL

Angela, I swear to god, if Voight or Hailey don't kill you, I Will (Halstead - get it? It's fun, leave me alone).

Guys, I honestly thought it was gonna be like when Kev got kidnapped and nothing extreme happened, apart from his injured leg, but that bitch really shot my son Jay! I thought he was gonna trick her somehow into giving up that gun, but it didn't happened... which is fine by me, because yeah I love my man, but I wanna see him suffer too. Sounds fucked up? Hell yeah, it does. Do I care? No, I don't. Give me my whump!Jay/Upstead content and I'll be happy.

#chicago med #will halstead #natalie manning #ethan choi #april sexton #crockett marcel #daniel charles #maggie lockwood #elsa curry #Chicago fire #stella kidd #matt casey #sylvie brett #brettsey #kelly severide #joe cruz #brian zvonecek #darren ritter #blake gallo #chicago pd #jay halstead #hailey upton #upstead #adam ruzek #kim burgess #hank voight #stellarise #dawsey #chexton #sexcel

[maskmakervega]

First entry: clearing my head on the end of the relationship

I don’t know if i’ll really use this much, but for now I’m just going to describe the issues with, and surrounding the end of my breakup. First and foremost, love doesn’t die. It can change, like energy, but it never goes away, once it is present it will always be there.  For her, lets just call her X, she seems to believe that love is the only thing a relationship needs, and if the relationship ends, the love was never real. This was a common thing she would either directly say or elude to after our numerous breakups. We got together in january 2019, but didn’t really start dating until around march, which is when she stopped pulling the plug on it. She was very indecisive at first, and considering we work together, it is both understandable and smart, we both had reservations... but both of us grew emotionally attached very quickly.  To say that she is both very harsh on herself, and hugely jealous, is accurate but underselling it as well. This became very evident after we started having sex, as she was intimidated by how many people I slept with back in my “confused and wanting to feel normal” days. She was also uncomfortable with the fact that i am attracted to certain aesthetics, and she doesn’t look that way, so she would always tell me that she isn’t my type and then let it get to her. This was a big bag of red flags that I should have run from, but I was really into her and figured she would learn that I am absolutely faithful and do not require someone to dress like a goth for me to be attracted to them. That did not happen, really ever, regardless of what she said. During the planning of her friends wedding (march?), they all decided to scour fetlife to see if they knew people on it, and she found my profile. It outlined what i find attractive, but also that I am not looking for anything but friendship, and that I hadn’t used the website in like 4 months. She saw that i liked a face picture of someone she knows, and that irked her (this person is goth). The profile description and lack of time i logged into it (before we dated) didn’t seem to matter, a week or so later she told me about that and that she couldn’t stop thinking about it, and how she isn’t right for me and she doesn’t know if she is happy. After hearing about that and me arguing with her for over an hour, I decided that this time I needed to break the relationship off. Clearly she wasn’t happy, and I didn’t like being told that a personal taste of mine is responsible for her feeling like she can’t be with me, something entirely out of my control and was never brought up to her.  X had returned my key and my things with a “sorry” card. I made the mistake of telling a mutual friend that i wanted her to make sure X is ok, and that shared the information and we started talking again. After 3 days we got back together. Up until this point, she really wanted to keep our relationship a secret from everyone at work, adamantly, but within a month or two a few people knew. Not a big deal. 

In april/may, basically her birthday, she was going on about how one of her friends thought i was dark and bla bla bla, The dude is in love with her and tries to get into her head. It kinda worked, because a few weeks later when she had a little get together where 5 of us drank and played cards, she got hammered. We ended up leaving and going to my place, and that same guy texted her the entire time, trashing me again. She drunkenly broke up with me that night, didn’t remember in the morning. That let to another fight and honestly i don’t remember much about it.   It was about May/June when she really went ballistic, jealousy, over my roommates girlfriend. I had known this person for 14 years, and we slept together maybe 3 or 4 times (this person only remembers once). She was a long time friend, and her long distance boyfriend needed a place to stay in the area, so i let him move in as a favor. I am an unnecessarily honest person, I can’t keep lies straight and i don’t like to lie, so i just don’t. I told X about all of that before he even moved in, and she didn’t seem to make that much of a deal other than calling her a whore and all that (not to her face). The roommate was almost always in his room, and his girlfriend really only came over on weekends.  Things seemed fine, until one day X started blowing up about the other chick at random. Talking about how i shouldn’t be friends with her, how she doesn't want her to come over, how shes a whore and she doesn’t trust her (by proxy me) This was a vicious fight, and it made no sense. To make a long story short, i broke up with her because of how ridiculously unreasonable she was being. Her jealousy caused 2 breakups at that point, and we had only been dating for a few months.  I can’t think at the moment, there were several more breakups, i think 6 more. She counts 1 as me breaking up with her, but really it was her drunkenly making a fool of herself, embarrassing me with this in an up-scale bar, telling me every horrible thing she can about me, and breaking up with me on my birthday. But, she doesn't remember any of it and expected me to just forgive her. What caused it? Well we went out to dinner and then went to a club i like, it was a really great day until 30 seconds after we left the club. 

Outside there were 2 chicks and she was telling me they were checking me out, and i said something along the lines of “eh it happens”. It kinda snowballed for the next few minutes, delicately, enough so we drunkenly walked into the nice bar and sat down to order our desert martinis. This is where she kinda goes off on a tangent and then brings up how she doesnt trust a long time friend that i talk to, because MONTHS before, she got onto my COMPUTER while i was in the shower, and read my old messages with this person. Old messages from before we even started dating, and saw that i had told her i missed her (we had a romantic connection but never met in person, again, this was a different 16 year friendship). I was not making the best judgement, and gave her my phone to scroll through my messages to that person. to the effect of “really? prove it, prove where i said i miss her”.   She scrolled through about 6 months of texts, going “oh you talk a lot huh?” and things of that nature, but she never found what she was looking for. She accused me of deleting the message, which i didn’t even know you could do. I told her she had major trust issues and was blowing everything out of proportion and cant hold it against me that i have female friends, and she said “yeah well i’m not a whore, like you”.  Then went OFF as we were leaving. This went on for about 20 minutes, as we are driving home and she is piss drunk. Its at this point she gets even madder and says she is done with me. We get back home about an hour later, i have to shake her to get her out of the car because she is so blackout drunk. she goes inside, takes my blankets and wraps herself in them in the middle of my bed, so i have to go sleep in the living room.  Justifiably hurt and pissed off, i made a jab on facebook about how great it is to be dumped on your birthday.  She sees this because one of her 4 friends that is in love with her, buzzes her asking to hang out, so we wakes up to the knowledge that people understand her to be single. Then she freaks out at me, i take the post down (its about 7am), only a small handful of people saw it, unfortunately they were coworkers. I didn’t think or plan it out, i was hurt and angry and it seemed like a good idea.  We get into a big discussion about it, and how she would never break up with me, i tell her about every detail from the night before and she doesn’t even remember leaving the bar. That made it worse, because i drank A LOT when i was with her. About a bottle of scotch every 10 days, and we would go to get beers and stuff sometimes. She loves her booze, a lot of people do, but she doesn’t pace herself.  Days went by with her trying to whittle me down and take her back, i think it turned into about a week by the end. When she had whittled me down to the bone with begging, i folded to an extent. I told her she needs to cut back on the drinking, and we got together.  This lasted a few weeks (toward mid september) until she got into the jealousy issues again. It was a friend on facebook, who posted a workout photo and they had lost a lot of weight. I liked the photo, and that turned into a fight. Between that, and her telling me she was feeling like i didn’t love her as much since the last breakup, i broke it off again for about another week.  I was going to have surgery in a few days and we started talking again, we made peace and agreed that as long as she started seeing a therapist we could try dating again, but i didn’t want to jump back into it super quickly, just hang out.  That lasted a good while,and she really seemed to be trying.  Bla bla bla, 2 breakups later we are where we are now.  The final breakup was January 10th.  We had been together, secretly, for about 6 weeks at that point.  It was secret because her friends all hated me by this point, and her roommate (her ex of 5 years) said he would kick her out if we started dating again. Yeah, she left that last part out, which really burned me. Her housing situation was dependent on her roommate not finding out we were together again, and that meant she had to spend less time with me.  Between the 2nd week of december and the first week of january, i saw her probably 8 days... we used to spend nearly every day together. I started seeing the pattern more clearly, and saw how this would not work. It was also about this time that my depression started to kick in again (huge theme that entire year, go figure), and i couldn’t help but over-analyze. You think quite a lot when there is deafening silence in your head, you feel nothing but empty, and the dark swallows you whole. I ended up doing what I should have done months ago, which was to be good to myself and take some much needed space.  I needed to look out for me, because this relationship was making me feel unwanted and depressed.

The relationship was a roller coaster every few weeks, of whether she would freudian-slip some jealousy (that she said she fixed in therapy), or seem to withhold affection and time alone because of reasons she wouldn’t share (usually relating to those incidents). I couldn’t continue question myself because she’d question me, i couldn’t feel like i was nothing but a warm body to cuddle up next to. We didn’t have the ability to get into long conversations, she was afraid of them, and it made me feel a growing divide between us.   At the one month mark of the breakup she was still trying to hang on. We talked about trying to hang out as friends, and she swore thats all it would be, but within 2 days she completely changed her tune and said she didn’t want to hang out unless it was to move toward getting back together. As of last week (valentines day) she had to leave work because someone decided to give her anonymous flowers and she thought it was me. She started messaging me and i had to shutdown what she was thinking, which made her cry and she left for the day.  This has not been an easy process, because i deeply care for X. Although we had a lot of good times, i am a realist and to many, a pessimist, and looking back I see more bad than good. Distrust is a demon that must be slain to make a relationship function, and that is why ours was so dysfunctional. Hell, i think i have trust issues too now at this point. A lot of detail has been left out here, I don’t know if she will ever find this so I left a lot of personal and identifying details out, many of which are crucial to why the relationship failed so many times... but, i also don’t think anyone will read this.

#reflection breakup confusion heartbreak selfimprovement space staystrong

[brattywriters-anonymous]

A Night Off..

Erik x OC

Part three of “I’m Never Wrong” Series

Mini playlist: Moments Of Love x Art of Noise

It’s You x Kem

Share my Life x Kem

Night Off x Drake ft. Lloyd

You’ve been busy. Hella busy. Erik and you had Leanna September after that fateful Christmas, you married the following April, and two years later (before Leanna’s Moana Luau birthday celebration) you found out you were pregnant again. You gave birth to N’Juma That following summer and after being cleared to return to work you were swamped.  

You received the promotion for Managing Partner at your firm and you played the role of the Partner’s keepers. Even though you were glad about not having to see courtrooms unless deemed necessary, you now have to track their time at work and expenses on business cards, their vacation and sick time; Along with sitting in extraneous meetings with board members with their bottom line being the only thing they ever care about. You know you could quit at anytime. Your husband reminds you time and time again that he can take care of you, Lee, JuJu, and any other kids you plan on having single-handedly. 

Him being a prince and all, you were certain that he could. Momma just didn’t raise you to be nobody’s housewife. You love your children more than anything, and to a certain extent, you love your job, but after two months of going between Mommy and Senior Partner, F/N M/N Udaku, esq. needed a BREAK.

You came home on a Friday evening to find two ladies from the Dora Milaje on your front porch, you knew either Queen Mother, Shuri, or T’challa was behind the door. To your surprise, it was Shuri. You often used to joke to her that Leanna took a piece of Shuri’s personality because she always had a witty come back to her daddy’s sly comments, and they were as thick as thieves from the day she was born.

“Y/N! Hello!” Shuri stands up with your almost four year old in her arms. “Mommyyy!” Leanna yells out in glee. “Hey Lee Lee! Good evening Shuri! To what do we owe this pleasure your highness?” You suspiciously look at her and your daughter like they were up to no good, as you lay down your briefcase. Leanna looks around pursing her lips and says, “Mommy, I d-du-dunno what you talking about!” as she shakes her head. You grin at her adorable yet horrible attempt of lying, “Where’s Juju? Where’s daddy?” Speak of the killer prince..he shall appear. He emerges from the hallway, “Juju is knocked for the night. I gave him his bath fed him, and he went down for the count about fifteen minutes ago.” 

The first thing that catches your attention is his cologne. That Dolce & Gabana light blue for men gets you in trouble every single time. You slip out of your work shoes as you apprehensively question, “N’jadaka, What do you have up your sleeve?” Then you travel to your awake child, placing her on your hip, “What is daddy up to LeeLee?” She starts playing with her nails, “Daddy says he wants you to go with him!” Erik scoops you into his embrace, “Daddy needs you to shower up and get dressed. I got everything all laid out for you on the bed, and after we go where we go, I got a room reserved.” His cologne engulfs you into a hypnotized state as he briefly kisses you. You open your eyes to see Leanna covering hers. Shuri retrieves her, “I got some improvements I need to make on T’s suit, I need a little helper so we’re gonna go to the Stark Enterprises lab to do that..” You look back and forth between your husband, your cousin-in-law, and your child, “Well what about JuJu?” T’challa bends the corner from your guest bathroom, “It seems like I am on diaper and bottle duty tonight.”

You lay your arms lazily around Erik’s neck, “So daddy’s got it all figured out, hm?” N’jadaka nods, “Now go get dressed. Don’t make me repeat myself.”

You get to your shared master room to see this two piece outfit with a pair of white pasties, and a white thong to match your husband’s two piece linen button up and matching pants. “Where does this nigga think I’m going looking like somebody’s stripper?” before you can go back in the foyer to protest, he’s already standing at the doorway, “You going with daddy tonight. Lookin’ like daddy’s personal stripper.” He stealth-like footsteps cruises his way over to you to give you a forceful smack on the ass, which got bigger thanks to carrying Juju.

 --

You hopped out of the shower, reluctantly put on the two piece and as you were buckling your shoes, your husband comes in to check on--sorry, rush you. “C’mon Y/N we need to get go--daaaaaammmn. Here baby, lemme help you with that.” He brushes down your calf with his fingertips, slipping on your shoe. “That’s too tight?” You shake your head, “Good.” He counts the hole in order to buckle the other shoe in the same manner, “I’m doing this for you because you need a night off.. Not being mommy, not being a lawyer, not being a home maker, nurse, none of that.” He finishes buckling the second shoe before kissing your foot, “The only thing you gotta be tonight is mine.” your breathing stops at his statement, then you nod. Letting him know you understand.

The drive to your destination was tranquil. Erik played the compilation of Moments of Love by Art of Noise, Kem’s It’s you, and Share my Life, Maxwell’s Lifetime.. it all put you in a mellow mood. He drove the entire way with his hand cascading your thigh, occasionally tapping it to whichever beat was playing. He puts the car in park in front of the club you first met at. When he ran you down, begging to take you on a date that he had to rob a museum in order to take you on.

You giggled and sank into the seat, “N’jadaka, really?” He nods, “Yeah baby. I figured i’d take you to where it all began.” This nostalgic feeling fell over you, remembering how he followed you around the lounge like a sick puppy, his dreads barely touching his neck back then. You give him a second glance, his dreads are now almost to the middle of his back, his nape; tapered. You lean into him, making out with your husband like you’re seventeen. The valet worker tapped on the window to snap you out of it.

--

Erik really planned that night out. He got a VIP section, got him a bottle of Hennessy prestige, and you a white bottle of Belaire Rose. The waitresses gave you both your appropriate glasses to drink your alcohol out of with a bucket of ice. Your husband kept attempting to roleplay, asking who you were with, “I’m with you, fool!” He then asked where your man was at, you pointed at him. You finally caught on when he asked for your name and number. You put on a corrupt grin, “Heaven. and I don’t think my man would like you asking for my number.” You were good and toasted by the time N’jadaka and you were playing a good game of back and forth, “Oh.. Well your man shouldn’t have left you alone.” The slow tempo of Drake’s A Night off sounds off in the club, “This is my jam!” Your man whispers to you, “See, why would your man leave you along while your song is playing? C’mon. At least dance with me.” You gulped down your fourth glass before taking the last sip out of your bottle, “Let’s go.”

Know you hate explaining how you want it done Just be quiet I'll do fine without your help girl Can you work without a second for some fun? Now you finally got a moment to yourself girl And I know what to do with it

You whine your lower half to his, your ass giggling at the end of every loop. He poured you one more drink for the night, some of his Hennessy, which you both took your glasses onto the dance floor. His free hand is alternating, between gripping your inner thigh, to grasping on both of your cheeks as your mirrored each break down of the beat. His eyes narrow as he bites down on his trembling lip, never letting his hand leave your body. As you feel his erection growing you grind against him even harder. He reaches underneath you to grip your breast, tweaking the skin underneath your pastie. You’re drunk at this point, so all you do in reaction is keep dancing and sticking your tongue out. He has you exactly how he wants you. Relaxed, drunk, and worked up.

So, baby, I'm a lock my door and disconnect my phone Cause I wanna make one thing clear 

I want you on top, so let your hair down I took the night off for you Girl, I'm gonna turn the lights off But keep your heels on They're fittin' for what we're about to do

He has a look on his face that you love to see, pure lust and astonishment. Just at you dancing for him.You look down at his hand with the vibranium wedding band you placed on it three years prior is shining even in the almost nonexistent club lighting. His thick fingers grabbing on you like you’ll dissolve at any moment.The Dj switches the song to Keith Sweat’s Nobody, N’jadaka gives you a shock, pressing his fingers against your abdomen, standing you straight up. Then he presses your lower back down so you can still arch against him, as you continue your slow whine.

I wanna tease you I wanna please you I wanna show you baby, that I need you I want your body 'til the very last drop I want you to holler when you want me to stop

N’jadaka’s hands are still roaming your frame. His lips are now brushing past and behind your ear, “So tell me baby, can I get a taste of Heaven?” His growl at the end of his statement mixed with the drinks and that damn cologne were all working against your self control. You literally leaked down your leg. You took your iced out left ring finger and placed it where your nectar was racing down and fed it to him, “Is that good enough?” He moaned as the liquid hit his tongue. He licked a strip behind your ear which makes you tremble against him, “Nah babygirl. Daddy wants more.” He presses down your back even more so you can bend back over. He gently smacks your ass, letting it jiggle back he looks to the Ancestral Plane as if he’s thanking Bast herself for that ass of yours.

You throw back what’s in your glass like it’s a shot and grab him by the collar, giving him the look that he’s been waiting on since you got out the house, “Let’s go...Now.”

Erik made a reserved a room at the Fairmont across the bay. There’s a jam on the Oakland Bay Bridge. That and the tented windows on your Cayenne which gives you the opportune moment to unbuckle your seat belt and jump on the man that’s been tempting you the entire night. His sex playlist going through the speakers didn’t make it any better.

I wanna touch you Right now, right now, right now, right now, right now, right now We ain't gotta waste time going out on dates We ain't gotta count down till you come to my place We ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta), we ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta) We ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta) we ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta) You ain't gotta waste time sending me roses They gon' die anyway, man that's just boring You ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta), you ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta) You ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta) you ain't gotta, (you ain't gotta) 'Cause I want you right now

Your lips are fighting with his for dominance as you climb over to the drivers seat to straddle him. You rip about half of the buttons off of his shirt as your liquor tasting tongues tango. His hands smack against your ass over and over and over again, making you moan into him. Between kisses, while you’re trying to unbuckle his seat belt and his pants he mumbles two octaves lower than his normal voice, “Mmm.. So it’s like that?” You moan out over the music, “Yeah daddy, it’s like that.”  He finally shimmies out of his pants and simultaneously rips your thong and the crotch area of those fishnet pants. His primal side and the air hitting your center brings a shiver to your body and it continues as your lover submerges into you. 

You cry out, slightly in pain. You and N’jadaka have only made love a handful of times since your six week appointment after having N’Juma. Partially because he went on a two month wardog mission. He’d only came home a couple days ago, and you were so busy in mom mode when you weren’t in work mode and vice versa..you only snuck in a quickie when he first came home. So your healed body is still getting used to his girth again. What feels like a overwhelming pressure eventually morphs into the pleasure you remembered oh so well. You crouch your body to tuck in between his neck and chest as you ride him in the stop and go traffic. He’s basking in the spontaneity of it all, the suburban behind him is occasionally honking their horn at his delayed movement as traffic moves up. If they only knew what was distracting him.

The first of your many orgasms of the night surprises you. You didn’t feel it coming, until it came. Your body is convulsing on his and he holds you right where you are. You screamed his name as best as you could through it. He put the car in park and hoisted his hips to meet your bottom until you could move again. You slam down on him, “Mm mm. You don’t gotta do that. Let Heaven take care of you, daddy.” He smirks while looking at the creamy mess y’all created, “You sure?” You nod, “Yeah. I gotchu. That one caught me off guard.” You laugh together as you grind on him. You love when he’s deep in you, he knows it too. N’jadaka grips your hips as he bites down on your neck, coaching your movements. You move your head back, giving him more access as you feel the second orgasm arise. The head of his phallic member collided with that spot that makes you weak every time he hits it.

He huffs, “My baby cumming again huh?” You cry out yes, “I’m cumming too baby. Daddy gon make Heaven cum to him? Hmm?!” He rotates his hips around to tap it again.. and again... as he hits it the third time, your essence falls, in a trickling waterfall motion. You shriek in bliss as his motions don’t stop, neither does your orgasm.

The car behind you beeps again. Erik being the superman that he is, he put the car back in drive and moved up while still stroking you through what’s probably the longest orgasm you’ve ever had. You rest on him as he presses on the break, his leg slightly shook as he gritted his teeth. You looked at him, “I came. That asshole ruined it. But wait till I get ‘cho ass in that room. I’m really gon get a taste of heaven.” 

--

@chaneajoyyy @theunsweetenedtruth @hidden-treasures21

#erik killmonger #erik killmonger imagine #erik killmonger imagines #erik killmonger fanfiction #erik killmonger fanfic #erik killmonger fandom #erik killmonger fluff #erik killmonger smut #erik killmonger stevens #erik killmonger series #erik killmonger x reader #erik killmonger x you #erik stevens #erik stevens imagine #erik stevens imagines #erik stevens fanfiction #erik stevens fanfic #erik stevens fandom #erik stevens fluff #erik stevens smut #erik stevens series #black panther fanfiction #black panther imagine #black panther imagines #black panther au #black panther fanfic #black panther fandom #black panther fluff #black panther smut #black panther series

[reveriequill-rai]

Blood Candy: Chapter 3

(sorry this took so long ;u; i kinda just...forgot to post this LOL. things start getting good now i promise)

“And that’s why I’m even more sick of this vampire nonsense than usual,” I finished telling Seb. “That Oliver kid was something else. This better be a city-wide April Fool’s joke; if I hear one more thing about vampires, I will push you out of this seat and crash this car.”

“Sure you will, buddy,” Seb laughed. “Actually, no, you probably will…the second you put your hands on the wheel, this car’s gonna be like nope and crash into a building just to put itself out of its misery.” 

“Love it when my friend’s own car hates me; I must be doing something right. Now shut up and eat this candy I got from Jasper,” I sighed, lightly shoving the wrapped candy in Seb’s mouth.

“Hey don’t distract—CANDY!” Seb cried. I kid you not, he literally pulled over in order to open it, then got back on the road once it was in his mouth.

“So?” I asked. “How is it?” 

Seb nodded.

“It’s good!” he said, sucking on the candy. 

“Glad you like it.” I smiled. We sat in silence for a bit. 

“Seriously, this candy is amazing,” Seb said suddenly. His tongue--and even some of his teeth--were stained red. “Even someone who doesn’t have a sweet tooth would enjoy it! Next time you go in for an appointment, you gotta ask Dr. Kermit what’s in these and where he got ‘em.”

“I will, buddy. I will,” I said. I began to doze off as Seb was wrapping up his tangent, still a bit drained from the blood work. My nap was interrupted when I heard a car horn blare as I jolted awake to find a truck swerving out of our path.

“Dude, you good?!” I asked Seb. “You gotta be more careful, man. Geez, I shoulda never given you that candy.”

Seb didn’t say a word. I sighed and went back to my nap.

The same thing happened a few minutes later. 

“Seriously, Sebs, you gotta be careful,” I repeated. “Are you even listening to me? Helloooo?” 

Again, he didn’t speak. Once more, my attempted nap was interrupted by a car horn and a car moving out of our way. The driver in the other car yelled, “watch where you’re going!” I turned to Seb. His expression was blank, and he just kept driving. 

“Dude, you’re gonna get us in a crash!” I cried. “Screw it. Pull over! I’m calling an Uber.” 

To my surprise, he did. I got out of the car and onto the sidewalk. Suddenly, Seb’s car went forward, but I barely managed to get onto the sidewalk in time.

“WATCH IT!!” I yelled. “Are you trying to kill me?! What was in that candy, dude?!” I groaned as I ordered the Uber. Once I did, I turned to Seb, who stared at me blankly…almost longingly, actually. His mouth was open slightly, as if he were in some sort of a daze, revealing his stained teeth. The candy was a vibrant red color, but for some reason, his teeth were stained with a darker red color. It was...off-putting, to say the least, but I was far too angry at Seb to even think of it for more than three seconds. He had no right to look at me so stupidly like that without any sort of apology or explanation. He looked as if he had no clue what I meant or what he was even doing, but Seb, even in all his mindlessly idealistic, failing-at-least-two-classes glory, was much smarter than he seemed. He had to be, if he could weave together elaborate conspiracies by connecting points that were otherwise unrelated. Many of my friends were smart people--to an extent--and I intended on keeping it that way for a while.

I did notice, however, that Seb also looked rather tired all of a sudden. His skin looked just a bit paler than usual, and there were some slight bags under his eyes. It looked like he had been tearing up. This was...strange, to say the least, considering he was just as energetic and cheerful as always a few minutes ago. Why the sudden change?

“Don’t look at me like that, Sebs…” I sighed. “That candy better not be drugged. We’ll talk later…I’ll meet you at home, dude.” 

Seb drove off, but ended up just turning to park not too far from where I was. I rolled my eyes, thinking Seb probably just wanted to follow me home. 

Finally, the driver arrived and I climbed into the back seat as per usual. I greeted him, of course, but aside from that, the two of us didn’t speak to each other. 

The drive was fairly peaceful—in comparison to driving with Seb, at least—until the cab driver looked in his rear view mirror. 

“That car behind us is awfully close…” he commented. I turned around, looking out the back car window to find Seb in his car. I growled in frustration.

“He’s been acting weird today…” I said. “Just keep driving, and be careful. I’ll talk to him at—“ 

Suddenly, Seb’s car pulled up next to us on my side, blocking the entire lane. I was so startled that I nearly jumped out of my seat.

“I haven’t exactly studied the driver’s manual in a bit,” I said, “but I’m pretty sure this is a serious violation of traffic safety.” 

“You wouldn’t be far off,” he said. I looked at Seb, who was staring intently at me. At this point, the two cars were practically clashing. We stayed like this until we finally left the lane, and Seb continued to tail us home. I tried my best to ignore it; if I survived the drive then I could yell at him at home. 

“Sorry for the inconvenience,” I sighed, tipping the driver $20. “Here. For your trouble.” 

The cab driver, who already looked exhausted, gave me a smile. 

“Thanks,” he said. “Have a good day…and please deal with your friend.” 

“I will,” I replied. “You have a good day, too...or at least a better one than mine.”

 Seb got out of his car just as I got out of mine. The two of us walked back to our apartment in silence until we got home.

#blood candy #fiction #urban fantasy #original story #vampire

[danganronpa-21]

So in your Naegiri family au. How does the family prank eachother on aprail fools

In terms of Naegi-Kirigiri family April Fool’s Day, I’d say some members of the family are more committed to it than others. And by some members, I mean Koichi and Seiko are naturally more committed to it than the others. Why?

Simple: They’re desperate to fool their mother in some way, shape or form. 

Makoto and Hope? They could care less. Makoto’s just trying to avoid being the unintentional victim of pranks that were meant for his wife, and Hope wants to be sure that her siblings don’t go too far. But Koichi and Seiko? NO LIMITS.

Seiko’s pranks are fairly simple, childish. She is only eight years old, after all. She doesn’t have the advanced prankster mindset yet. Still, Koichi tries to be a good sensei to her. 

She tries all kinds of different things to try to get at her mama: caramel onions (Kyoko buys the groceries – she knows that Seiko doesn’t like onion, so she shouldn’t have asked so excitedly for them before the day came), putting salt in her coffee (Seiko confuses her father’s coffee for her mother’s), putting tape on her wireless laptop mouse (she disconnects it and uses the touchpad), falsifying a gross sneeze on the back of her neck with lukewarm water and a spray bottle (”All three of you kids sneezed on me when you were young, Seiko. I know what that feels like. Nice try, though.”), and toothpaste Oreos (she could feel while holding it that the cookie had a much softer consistency than normal). Nothing gets Kyoko. She’s ready to admit defeat against her mother when Koichi steps in, urging his little sister to not give up the fight. Though he’s never won against her either, he’s desperate to do so.

His first attempt is the confetti ceiling fan trick, in which he attempts to put little cut-up pieces of paper on the ceiling fan in the kitchen. Sure, the family avoids having her be the cook at all costs, but it wasn’t uncommon for her to turn it on while she was sitting at the dining room table to work on a case. This plan was a little too circumstantial, unfortunately, and the prank just ended up being a hassle for poor Makoto who got hot while baking. Cookies are hard work, Koichi!

The second attempt centers around putting a bug-shaped piece of paper on the inside of the lampshade. He’s extra careful to do it in the shape of an earwig, the insect that his mother hates with every fibre of her being. He sticks it on the inside of the lampshade in her office, hoping to maybe get her in the late hours of the night while she works at her desk. This one backfires when Seiko and Kyoko sit down at the desk to talk about their upcoming assingment, and Seiko is the one who discovers the “bug”. Not really thinking too hard about the shape, she decides that she’ll put her little friend on to her hand and set it free. She’s a little peeved when it turns out to just be a piece of paper, because she thought that “a little friend really needed her help!”

His final attempt was putting an airhorn on her office chair, which honestly could have worked if he didn’t knock down a small plush kitten that she kept on one of the shelves. Koichi knew it was an old, tattered toy that his father had won for her back in their high school days. Since it was so old, he and his sisters had been asked not to touch it – to preserve it as best they could. So he tried to carefully put the toy back on to the shelf, leaning on the chair he’d just finished setting up due to his short height… You can imagine how that went. Loud honking that scared him half to death, nearly made the poor little kitty toy fly through the air, had his family running to his rescue. Eventually he throws in the towel, insisting that he and Seiko will get Kyoko next year. She allows them to think that, and decides that the three of them should go out and pick up dinner. 

“It’s only fair considering what you two have put your poor father through today while trying to prank me.”

… This is the extent of what Seiko and Koichi manage, but Makoto and Hope resolved to get back at them for the years of surprise pranks they’ve had to undergo. Asking Komaru to conveniently provide distraction (”Fancy seeing my niece, nephew, and sister-in-law here!”), the father-daughter pairs each person’s room with balloons – to the point where they have to pop them to get in to the room. They are more than just a little cheerful when their loved ones come home to discover that yes, indeed, they are finally on the other side of someone else’s pranks. Koichi and Seiko can be satisfied that somebody got their mom, even if they did kind of screw themselves over (“Makoto, we sleep in the same bed. If I cannot get in there, neither can you.”)

Before the day ends, they decide to have a nice family dinner and focus on dealing with those balloons later. They set things up and talk about the pranks everyone came up with that day, the things they were intending to do, and everything is peaceful until Makoto sits down. A rather vulgar sound has come from his direction. 

Kyoko feigns a phony sense of disgust. “Really, Makoto?” She teases, “At the dinner table? In front of the kids?”

The kids burst in to a fit of giggles, knowing full well she placed a whoopee cushion on his chair. He pouts and sighs to her, “And you wonder why Koichi and Seiko are always so determined to get back at you...”

#Danganronpa 21 #koichi naegi-kirigiri #seiko naegi-kirigiri #hope naegi-kirigiri #makoto naegi-kirigiri #kyoko naegi-kirigiri #this one's a long answer! #DR21 Naegi-Kirigiri Family

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

Ugh, I’m so sick of Tulip & her stupid prank items. Why does she have to always carry dungbombs with her it makes no sense, I guess she just loves the smell of literal shit that much. No but fr, I hate how she takes pleasure in making places smell bad, like it’s not funny, it’s just annoying. I know it was actually an accident this time but I’m still annoyed. She’s been so irritating lately between this quest & her behaviour in the Mirror of Erised one imo.

Tulip's personality is probably an acquired taste, and in real life, I'm sure she would absolutely drive me bonkers, not in the good way either. Fun fact, I really don't like pranks, or practical jokes, or lies, etc. I've disliked them ever since I was a kid, as one of the adults in my life at time thought a good April Fool's Day joke was telling me that a loved one was in the hospital. Yeah, that kind of cruel nonsense. Most "pranks" aren't on that level, but to me, they all tend to follow the basic premise of putting another person in an unpleasant position for your own amusement, which...it's just not something I like to do to my friends...or anyone, really. There are exceptions I'm sure, I don't want to sound like I'm being judgmental (I probably do sound that way anyway, alas, but I don't mean to come off that way.)

And yet, as one of my favorite characters, I feel the need to defend Tulip just a little. Among other things, I understand your feelings, and it's doubly frustrating because yes, to a large extent, this is what Tulip is now. Nothing more than a vessel for this game's obsession with pranks, and I really don't like this because she's not supposed to be like that. I mean, she is, but she's far more than just that. The OG head writer had a vision for her, as a three dimensional character, and there are glimmers of that here and there, but for the most part, she's been forgotten and that really makes me sad.

But beyond that, in reference to the quests you're talking about in particular...to be fair to Tulip, the incident at the Weasley party was an accident. She didn't mean to do it. I know it's still her fault, but it's not like it was malicious, or like she was intentionally ruining the party for everyone else. As for the Mirror of Erised, I don't blame her for the way she acted in that quest, either. I think in that instance, everyone was acting out a bit, and that was deliberately done to show the influence that the Mirror was having on them. The Mirror is a special case - it can fuck with your head, and it certainly did with Tulip.

#Tulip Karasu

[els-writes]

Overall Rating: ★★

Ship of Magic. Book One of The Liveship Traders Trilogy. Forth Robin Hobb book I’ve read. And bane of my life for the past six months. 

Let me put this out there now: I adored the Farseer Trilogy. I binged those books in about two weeks at the start of this year, and they broke me in the best way possible. I took a month or so to recover after reading Assassin’s Quest, but I was hyped to get started on the next book. 

I started this book in April. I only finished it Halloween night. It’s been a long, long and difficult road. One that I can’t really sum-up as I usually do in my reviews. So it’s all or nothing, guys! 

I’d love to hear other people’s thoughts on this book - whether you agree with me or not! It’s a strange book for me, because I really didn’t expect not to like it, so I’m curious as to what others think!

So let’s get into it. 

NOT SPOILER FREE! 

Writing Style:  ★★★

I have a love-hate relationship with Robin Hobb’s writing style. When I first started Assassin’s Apprentice, it took me a good few days to try and get into the book. She is another one of those very wordy authors who I felt said a lot more than she needed to, in a much higher level language than she needed to. That’s not to say I don’t like that writing style, I actually quite enjoy it, but I have to be in the right mindset for it. However, I did so, and the style (thankfully) is consistent through this series so far. 

Ship of Magic, like the Farseer books, took me some time to get into. Especially with the fantasy-heavy language used in the first chapter of the book. It took me a handful of tries before I could manage the style again. 

I love the style. It’s rich, it’s vibrant, it’s full of exposition and imagery and just some really wonderful literary techniques and language. But I hate when I first pick up the book and remember I have to get ready for it. It’s not a style I can read when I’m tired or lazy, I have to be fully invested. So, love-hate. 

Characters: ★

Oh boy, here we go. 

I’m a character-driven reader. You can have the most fantastic, original, exciting, intriguing plot in the universe but I will not get on bored with it if I don’t like the characters. And this is where Ship of Magic was ruined for me, to be honest. This is what pulls down all those stars for the overall rating. 

I hated the characters. 

Now, stay with me. 

Kyle was an incredible character. He is the most vile, most disgusting character I have read in my entire life. I hated him to the point where at the end of the book, I was shaking with fury at him. Even just typing about him now is filling me with such stress and anxiety and hatred that I’m tensing up. He is one of the best written villains I have read, perhaps ever. And I thought Regal was bad in the Farseer books.

Every other character though? The ones I’m meant to like? They just... fell flat. They weren’t one-dimensional by any means, I just didn’t find myself liking any of them. There are a multitude of characters in Ship of Fools, that we follow who might be called a main character or a protagonist: Althea, Brashen, Wintrow, Kennit, and the three Vestrit women to a lesser extent. Some were primarily good, some were primarily bad, but none jumped out to me. I didn’t feel connected to any of these characters. Worse than that, they all kind of annoyed me. 

Althea and Brashen, I will say, I can stand. If the book focused entirely on them, maybe they would have grown on me just that little bit more to make all the difference. I like them, but they’re both kinda frustrating at times. For me, I was only reading it to see if they got together in the end, as it seemed pretty obvious from the start that was where it was going. (Spoiler: they did, I’m on board with it, they’re kinda cute). But I just didn’t really care. I will say I was most invested in the story when they were at the forefront, but it wasn’t enough. They’re characters develop seemingly the least out of all the characters, which is a shame, because they’re the only ones I was even slightly interested in. 

Kennit? To be honest, I don’t remember most of his plot. I know the gist of it, but it wasn’t that exciting, I wasn’t that invested. It just all sort of happened. His goal is cliche, but would be a little more interesting if I knew more about him. Maybe I just missed it, but to me he just seemed greedy and a kinda grumpy and... meh. 

The Vestrit’s in Bingtown: Ronica, Keffria, and Malta. All three were so incredibly frustrating, and so much drama could have been set aside if they’d just talked? Seriously. Just talk. And don’t even get me started on Malta. 

Ah, Wintrow. At the start of the book, he was the only character I was intrigued by. I wish I hadn’t been. 

Before I start, just to put this out there: I have a major soft spot for suffering characters. I often just ache and wish for them to get a chance to sit down and cry and get a hug off someone. 

Wintrow sits down and cries a lot. A lot. And yeah, it’s realistic for a young boy, but this kid is so infuriating that I didn’t even know what to do with myself. He is a complete pain throughout the whole book, doesn’t actually do anything that major for the plot, now I think about it, and then at the very end his character does this massive 180 out of nowhere? I get what Hobb was trying to do, but I might have liked Wintrow a little more in the end if he’d grown in a believable way at least? Not as suddenly and violently as he did? 

Quick note on some of the other very important characters. The liveships. 

Vivacia: Whiny and annoying. I get she’s new and young and stuff is happening to her but come on, she was emotional and unbearable even before the slaves were put on, and I refuse to believe it was all Wintrow’s emotions shaking her up. 

Ophelia: The true queen of this book. I want far more focus on her please, I love her. 

Paragon: LITERALLY THE ONLY THING IN THIS ENTIRE BOOK I CARE ABOUT. AND IT’S THE ONE CHARACTER WHO LITERALLY DIDN’T EVEN MOVE FOR THE WHOLE 838 PAGES. 

Okay, I’m calm again... on we go. 

Plot: ★★★

It was fine. I’m not going to spend too long on this, because I think a lot of my opinions on the plot are tainted by my feelings about the characters. It was predictable a lot of the time, which doesn’t make it bad. A few points got me interested. If I take away all the mayhem of character 180s, the ending was good and strong. But the reason this book took me six months to finish? I just didn’t want to pick it up. I didn’t feel inclined to. There was no point where I put the book down and was thinking about where it was going from there. When I put this book down, it just stopped existing to me. And that rarely happens. 

World-Building: ★★★★

So much potential. I love Hobb’s world building. I practically drool thinking about the world I read about in the Farseer trilogy, it was just fantastic and beautiful and so intricate and exciting! This had elements of it, I could see that. Wizardwood? Liveships? Rain Wilds? Those kinds of things sound amazing - I adore the idea of the ships coming to life. But, because of that big old character section, it fell flat. I’m not faulting the world-building for that though, because I have hope that the next two books go into more depth into it all. 

Ability To Make Ellen Hate Reading: ★★★★★★

I’m not even kidding. This book sucked the fun out of reading for me, and I’m so sad about that. In the past six months, I’ve only read two other books. Nevermoor, because I had to read it for work (loved it). And The Book of Dust, because it’s from my all-time favourite series (loved it). I just didn’t want to read, and it was mostly because I felt guilty picking up another book whilst I hadn’t finished this one. 

After I finished this book, I picked up a new one (review on that coming very soon). I finished it in 4 hours. I literally forgot how easy it is to read because of this book. 

What’s Next?

I don’t usually need this on the end of my reviews, but I kind of have to here. 

The Robin Hobb books were recommended to me by a close friend. I say again: I loved the Farseer trilogy so much. I’d also been warned that out of the trilogies in this world, The Liveship Traders were her least favourite, and she guessed that I might not like them much. I really want to keep reading this world, and I love reading a complete series. I have been told it is not necessary to read this trilogy to read the others, but it will merely help me understand and appreciate certain elements of the other books. I am on the fence about picking up the next book. I have it on my shelf, but I hate the fact that I’m dreading facing it. 

I’m stubborn. I don’t like dropping books without finishing them, which is why I forced myself through this one. So I’m asking y’all’s advice. If you’ve read these books, do you think I should keep at it with Liveships, or give in now and move on? I’d love to hear what you think! 

I am so sorry this review is just words on a page at this point, but I had a lot of feelings and I needed to get them out. 

#review #book review #ellenreviews #i dont even want to tag this book #if i had liked the characters i think i would have really enjoyed this #but i didn't #so i didn't

[classyfoxdestiny]

Military equipment to WTO push – How US aided China’s extraordinary rise

Military equipment to WTO push – How US aided China’s extraordinary rise

File photo | Mao Tse Tung, shakes hands with Henry Kissinger, while Gerald R. Ford, Susan Ford watch, 2 December 1975, Peking | US National Archives

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The US opening to China in the summer of 1971, heralded by Henry Kissinger’s secret trip to Beijing in July 1971, has been romanticized and celebrated in American and Western annals. In India, the trip was vilified and demonized. With time, the triumphalism associated with it in the US and elsewhere has meliorated and the opprobrium attached to it in India has softened. Fifty years on, how shall we assess it? China opening played a role in the ending of the Cold War, though the Soviet Union played the decisive part in its own destruction. The normalization of US-China relations also played a role in China’s rise. However, Kissinger was hardly the main architect. Much of the credit on the US side should go to the presidents that succeeded Richard Nixon and the National Security Advisors (NSAs) that followed in Kissinger’s wake. The US sowed the seeds of China’s rise for forty years, and now it and others must deal with Chinese power as never before.

Having said that, the next century will not be a Chinese century. The future will be bipolar, with three bipolar possibilities—the most likely being one that Kissinger would have been familiar with, namely, regulated competition. As for India, it missed the signs of the sudden rapprochement in 1971. It must be attentive to the signs of the US once again possibly changing course with China. It is good to remember that the US has long had a fascination with China. Even in these times of Sino–US conflict, the American interest in, knowledge of, and linkages to China are far greater than with India.

Also read: Biden’s US is done engaging with China. This is what India should do now

Kissinger and the opening to China 

Henry Kissinger is credited with the opening to China in 1971, but it would be more accurate to say that he was ‘associated’ with it. America’s decision to normalize relations with China was already in process before Kissinger became Richard Nixon’s National Security Advisor: the thought of a strategic opening to China can clearly be traced to the Kennedy and Johnson administrations in the period 1961 to 1965. In any case, it was Nixon more than Kissinger who conceptualized the move. And it was President Jimmy Carter and his NSA, Zbigniew Brzezinski, and then President Ronald Reagan and his team who laid the foundations for the lips-and-teeth relationship that was to develop for the rest of the Cold War. Kissinger’s informal advice to US presidents and Chinese leaders, his voluminous writings and his consultancy work may have done more for US–China relations than his policy interventions in office.

As early as 1963, the US was already working on a degree of normalization with China. Washington was aware of the Sino–Soviet rift of the late 1950s and sensed an opportunity. In 1961, when he took office, President John Kennedy wanted to move beyond the diplomatic stalemate with China under his predecessor, Dwight Eisenhower, but given the narrowness of his victory in the presidential elections, he held off. Even so, a policy review was quietly begun. The slow churn on China might have led to some ‘breakthrough’ initiatives in December 1963. With Kennedy’s assassination in November those moves petered out. Nevertheless, in December 1963, Assistant Secretary of State for Far Eastern Affairs Roger Hilsman gave a speech where, in Joanne Chang’s words, he ‘urged Americans to take a realistic view of the PRC, asserting that the Communist regime was here to stay and recognizing the possibility that the PRC would evolve into a more moderate state’.

Kennedy’s death slowed down but did not altogether stop the winds of change. By 1965, President Johnson was already easing the travel ban and the restrictions on Chinese journalists—if this had little effect, it was because Beijing was not ready for an opening. Indeed, under Johnson, relations worsened due to the full-blown US military intervention in Vietnam. The anti-war protests at home doomed Johnson’s re-election hopes, and in November 1968, Nixon, defeated by Kennedy in 1960, won the presidency. As early as October 1967, he had penned an article in the US journal, Foreign Affairs. Titled ‘Asia After Viet Nam’, it argued for the necessity of engaging China. Nixon’s clinching argument was that ‘Any American policy toward Asia must come urgently to grips with the reality of China … Taking the long view, we simply cannot afford to leave China forever outside the family of nations, there to nurture its fantasies, cherish its hates and threaten its neighbors.’

Between March and September 1969, China and the Soviet Union fought a series of battles along the Ussuri River over their unsettled border claims. The fighting started after the People’s Liberation Army (PLA) ambushed Soviet forces. The emerging strategic convergence between the US and China may well have emboldened Beijing to precipitate matters with Moscow. In the event, the Soviets, rather shaken by the Chinese attack, were stirred to contemplate radical action including a possible joint nuclear attack with the US on Chinese nuclear forces. The US refused. China meanwhile decided that it needed a tacit alliance with the US. A complex process of signalling between the two sides ensued.

Looking back on it, quite a bit of the process leading up to Kissinger’s trip in July 1971 was jejune if not comical. A Chinese media account describes some of the communication that went on in 1970. First, Chinese leader Mao Zedong invited American journalist and writer Edgar Snow to stand on top of the Tiananmen gate to watch the National Day celebrations, a privilege never granted to a foreigner before. Then, President Nixon announced rather mawkishly during an interview with Time magazine, that ‘If there is anything I want to do before I die, it is to go to China. If I don’t, I want my children to.’ This was followed by the comedy of the US table tennis team meeting their Chinese counterparts in a tournament in Japan and asking to be invited to a subsequent tournament in China. The request was turned down until an American and Chinese player descended together from the Chinese team bus grinning in front of reporters. When Mao saw the picture of the two players, he ordered the Chinese team to accept the American request. The US team finally played in China in April 1971, and no less than Zhou hosted a reception for them. The Chinese also ensured that some of their players lost to the outgunned Americans—mocking their rivals and befriending them at the same time!

These and other—more serious—signals led up to Kissinger’s incognito trip to Beijing, with its near-farcical elements. The trip was hilariously codenamed ‘Marco Polo’. Before he went to the airport, Kissinger suddenly feigned heat sickness and was taken to Pakistani President Yahya Khan’s retreat outside Islamabad to ‘recover’. Later, he was to go to the airport with his face covered in a scarf and sunglasses. There is a hint of Peter Sellers’ farcical Inspector Clouseau from the Pink Panther movies here— secrecy that was hardly warranted and a disguise that would not have fooled anyone who was even vaguely familiar with the Kissinger visage.

The convulsive laughter in Beijing must have been a sight to see. Here were hard-boiled revolutionaries, who had fought and survived a cruel civil war and a war against Japan, being asked to play amateur cloak- and-dagger with the naïfs, Nixon and Kissinger. Is it any wonder that the meetings with Kissinger were marked by a touch of condescension on the part of Mao and Zhou? While Nixon and Kissinger were full of vanity and desperate to leave their mark in history, Mao and Zhou were comfortable in their own skins and had already taken their places in history. The meetings were not of equals: the Americans kowtowed, and the Chinese knew it. Kissinger seems to have been overawed and so desperate to make the opening that he exceeded his brief. For instance, according to John Pomfret, ‘He [Kissinger] assured Zhou that whether or not China pursued peaceful unification with Taiwan, “We [the US] will continue in the direction which I indicated”—which meant that the US would withdraw recognition of Taiwan and establish ties with China.’

Nixon and Kissinger certainly made the breakthrough—and more— with Beijing that the Kennedy administration had hoped to curate. Yet, the roots of the China opening go back to the assassinated president and his team. Neither Nixon nor Kissinger were ever generous with their praise of others. With the benefit of hindsight, we can see that too much credit has been given to Nixon–Kissinger and particularly to Kissinger, given that Nixon had conceptualized the opening as early as 1967.

Also read: Don’t burden Delhi-Washington ties with Afghanistan, or issues like democracy under Modi

The world after the Kissinger visit 

The choreography around Kissinger’s trip may have been ludicrous, but the purpose was serious as were the consequences. It was correct to bring China out of the cold and into international order: one billion people had to be recognized and integrated. The alliance against the Soviets was less understandable. If Washington and Beijing had read US diplomat George Kennan’s ‘Sources of Soviet Conduct’ more carefully or taken more seriously the young Russian dissident Andre Amalrik’s Will the Soviet Union Survive Until 1984? (published in 1970), they would have seen that they were confronting an increasingly hollow empire that was not far from self-destruction. Or perhaps the Chinese knew the extent of Soviet infirmities but played on the credulity and greed of the Americans to further their own project—which was more about accessing US investment/technology than it was about forging a common front against Moscow. After all, Beijing could have hardly failed to notice that only those countries that befriended the US and accessed its capital and knowhow achieved rapid, sustained economic growth: that was the story of East Asia from the 1950s onwards.

More than Nixon and Kissinger, it was Carter/Brzezinski, then Reagan/ George W. Bush Sr., and finally Bill Clinton that helped China on its extraordinary economic journey from 1979 to the present—which is why the Chinese accusation that the Americans have always tried to contain China’s rise is so laughably absurd. Beyond economic partners, the US and China became strategic partners. When the Soviets sent in their forces to save the Babrak Karmal government in Afghanistan in December 1979, the US and China with Pakistan deployed Islamic radicals to wear down the Red Army. Over the next decade, the US released high technology and weaponry to China to bolster the quasi-alliance. It granted most-favoured-nation (MFN) status to China, relaxed Cold War rules so that the US and its allies could sell advanced technology to Beijing, provided credits so that the Chinese could import US technology and approved World Bank loans.

The US also helped modernize China’s military equipment. Chinese students and tourists in the US and Americans visiting (and sometimes studying) in China grew dramatically. When Warren Christopher, Clinton’s secretary of state, rather timorously tried to raise the issue of human rights, Premier Li Peng, ‘the Butcher of Beijing’ (so named for his role during the Tiananmen Square protests), responded aggressively and cancelled the American diplomat’s meeting with Jiang Zemin, general secretary of the communist party. Predictably, China gave no ground, and yet in 2001 the Clinton administration went ahead to endorse China’s membership in the WTO. And the rest, as they say, is history—the history of China’s astonishing rise.

This excerpt from A New Cold War: Henry Kissinger and the Rise of China, Edited by Sanjaya Baru and Rahul Sharma, has been published with permission HarperCollins India. 

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