#i genuinely am

[lapelle-du-bubblegum-vide]

Ok, so I just opened tumblr, not watched Tommy’s lore yet, and why is the dash on fire????? Why am I seeing people panicking and comforting each other????? I’m so scared????

#i genuinely am #I’ve been here for almost 2 years I have no means to watch the lore yet and omfg it’s like seeing people screaming and shouting #at something through the window but you don’t know what and why and everything inside is calm #I am so fucking scared of what I’m about to watch #and if someone read the tags I’d really appreciate an answer to this because oh christ am I dying right now #dream smp #c!tommyinnit finale #c!tommyinnit #calls from the void

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny #I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh #@ staff do this cowards #spy has thoughts #my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track #functional website #spy's smash hits #Glock function #edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped' #I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this #but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up #I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one

[variksel]

i hate you ai art i hate you "unalive" i hate you youtube premium i hate you twitter 8$ checkmark i hate you nfts i hate you therapy app advertisements i hate you non-chronological timelines i hate you instagram reels i hate you subtle tiktok filters that cant be turned off i hate you family bloggers i hate you ads on true crime episodes i hate you facebook i hate you vr glasses on chickens i hate you dystopian social media

#sorry but genuinely sometimes i feel like we live in a fucking dystopia #i get ads of chat bots designed to look like cute girls who will listen to your problems and it. god #its so unbelievably strange in some indescribable way #how am i supposed to explain that the word unalive makes me want to tear my hair out #vent #rant #idk

[hantu-burung]

every image of a tawny frogmouth is perfection. i've never seen a single picture of a tawny that dissapoints.

#they're stunning. theyre dignified. theyre old and scruffly. they're invisble. theyre adorable. theyre sillygoofy. #theyre adorably grouchy. theyre full of love. theyre ugly as hell. theyre gorgeous. theyre scared little animals. theyre wise storytellers. #and i genuinely am not saying this to be XD quirkyty or anything but. podargus strigoides is the cutest latin name i've EVER heard. #theyre perfect. everything to me. make me smile in the darkest of times #tawnies

[tuffluff7]

Happy international women's day sipping pina coladas by the pool with my lesbian boywife in celebration

#me talking #I genuinely am #It is our 1 year anniversary Yay

[sailahina]

It's annoying how good fried spam is. My weakness. I just put some in an omelette and it was incredible.

Constantly fighting my conscience with my wallet😔

#I'm sorry piggies #I genuinely am #can't think about it too much or else I'll get upset #but also like #ough crispy

[etchif]

#genuinely curious how people feel about this #I do it and I neither care if Im being annoying nor do I think I am #the ppl who followed me for my art are not going to get annoyed at me for showing them my art #though sometimes i get worried for like 1 millisecond if i come across as pushy then i remember this is the art website abd i stop caring #polls #art #can I tag this as that even if there's no actual art in the post #well. it IS about art

[reallybadblackoutpoems]

the crucible (1953) - arthur miller

“ough”

#ough #ok #i know i literally never fucking post #but um #i will not be as active #i am genuinely very sorry #idk #im just kind of having a rough time #who isnt tbh #but anyway #this is my warning and also my apology for this #sorry #blackout poetry

[tam--lin]

In light of increasing anti-trans and anti-abortion laws in the United States, I am once again humbly requesting you inform yourself about jury nullification, your ability as a juror to vote against convicting people being prosecuted under unjust laws. Nullification was instrumental in legalizing abortion in Canada - it informed jurors can use it to help protect healthcare workers and protesters in the US, too.

#I am not a lawyer so please do not ask me questions - I will simply google them as you might #but I do care about this so so much #genuinely: read about it. post about it on social media. tell your friends who have jury duty about it #especially those in 'red' states #it can be so powerful #tam.txt #jury nullification #I still want to get embroidered 'research jury nullification' sweatshirts made.....

[egophiliac]

we were fucking ROBBED

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 part 8 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 part 8 spoilers #the only ssr i'll whale for #oh my god i loved this update. holy shit #got some ~compositions~ in mind so i'll get to the more serious stuff later #in the meantime those first couple of chapters genuinely made me question if i was perhaps trapped in my own absurd dream or not #the whole-ass video just DROPPED in there idia how long were you WORKING on that #don't forget to like and subscribe! :) #i demand that all cutscenes be animated in that style forevermore #i also demand that all clothing changes henceforth be done via magical girl transformation phrase #not just in the dreamworld. all of them. #DREAM~~~~~FORM~~~~~CHAAAA~~~~NGE #also savanarook was so unexpectedly precious! i want to protect him. #augh there's SO MUCH and i am SO PLEASED with all of it #anyway i guess we're going to be going through everyone's dreams after all! #and it's going to be a THING!!!!!!!! CLOSURE AND SELF-ACCEPTANCE FOR EVERYONE #(insert 'it's all coming together' meme) #man i hope 'please watch this video' remains a running gag it's AMAZING #also i cannot believe #i cannot BELIEVE #that the plan is actually literally #defeat malleus by inviting everyone else to the party except him #HIS ULTIMATE WEAKNESS #malleus doesn't get to be in smash bros

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!! #my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her) #hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet. #i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!! #i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art. #i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

[heyassbuttlmao]

hate being in that weird in-between state where like. i am not doing Bad per se. like nothing is really wrong, i'm not actively having a mental health crisis, i'm more or less doing fine, but i just feel crunky and gross mentally and it's like!! not bad enough to be a big deal but also i feel bad and am not being very productive because of it

#like i'm fine yk #i genuinely am #i just also feel off and like i'm moving through sludge #this is mostly bc i woke up too late to take my meds but also has been extra strong this past week #probably because i am stressing about my meds yet haven't made the goddamn phonecalls i need to make to sort it out #anyways. brains!! so fun!!

[chubbychiquita]

my weight maybe got a little bit out of control 😳

#just wanted to appreciate the side by side #i genuinely cannot believe how enormous i am #unfathomable to be a verified SSBBW

[uncanny-tranny]

The leftism/anticapitalism leaving people's bodies the zeptosecond you imply that disabled people who aren't "productive" still matter in society and need to be treated like intrinsic equals who have a place in this world:

#disability #disability advocacy #described images #image description in alt #ableism #ableism tw #my full-time job is my disability and you're lucky that i am still 'productive' as-is #your boss doesn't care that you think you're superior for being hired by them. they're still going to treat you like profit machines #it astounds me how people will capitulate for oppression because they place their intrinsic value in their ability to be at the top... #...or at least 'at the top' compared to others. it's the same impulse that makes people think their cisgender status makes them superior... #...you are placing your worth into systems which not only oppress others but offer you no true sense of worth... #...ESPECIALLY if you're also being exploited (even if just a bit)... #...you have a job sure but... do you actually get treated like a human being? are you actually paid? are you actually safe?... #...if the answer to any of those questions and more is 'no' then why do you place your value in capitalistic production. genuinely. #and why would you DEMAND disabled people to have the same exploitation you experience. why do you DEMAND productivity if you are proletaria #yes being a leftist and anticapitalist are linked but. some people still internalize capitalism without questioning it #being a leftist is about challenging that rather than assuming you're correct i think #also scientists were very silly when describing time that's like. less than a millisecond i think

[nat-20s]

I am far from saying the 60th anniversaries were perfect BUT I already know I fundamentally can't relate to people who didn't like the bi-generation. You don't like David Tennant and Ncuti Gatwa being silly together? You don't like Donna getting her bestie back? You don't like the physical embodiment of radical self love?? You don't like that we get to keep the same bitchin Tardis set but it has a jukebox and entry ramp now??? Where's your whimsy where's your fucking whimsy???

#dw spoilers #doctor who #AGAIN i am not saying doctor who is like immune to criticism or anything BUT #sometimes people complain about the things that are fun and i genuinely dont get it. #doctor who is not for the weak of whimsy imo