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disregardandfelicity · 1 month

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i was lucky enough to attend the premiere on tuesday (as the +1 of a contest winner); in case this is of interest (and, indulgently, to preserve it for my own memory), here are some tidbits from my night:

for the screening, the cast had assigned seats (jacob and delainey in the same row, sam behind jacob, eric behind sam, assad on the other side of the aisle, the same side as rolin, hannah, and mark johnson). sam and jacob were off to the side chatting during intros and never sat in theirs

delainey got applause from the audience upon her first on screen appearance, the only cast member to get one

daniel had a fair few interview beats which got laughs from the audience

afterwards, an actor from the venue came up and gave a little speech as though he was from a sister coven to the TdV in paris. then we were dismissed to the party, which was upstairs

initially post party, assad and luke were in the front larger room of the reception - sam and jacob were, i believe, already gathered in a far back corner in the second room, along with some other people. eric didn't stay for the party

the venue had a couple little 'shows' - at one point the whole cast and some other guests went up several flights of stairs to a room (delainey commented on how many flights there were as we climbed) where a version of the no pain scene from the books was reenacted by venue actors

kalyne coleman was there, i saw her chatting with jacob. i let her cut in front of me for drinks as an excuse to talk to her. there's a nod to grace in the episode and it sounded like that was a surprise to her (a pleasant one!)

my conversations with the cast were deeply unsubstantive, i was too pleased to be there to come up with anything too clever or probing to say tbh

when i spoke to jacob, i started by saying "sorry" (just reflexively) and he immediately, very warmly, was like what are you apologizing for! when i said how excited i was for the season and he said something like 'i hope it doesn't disappoint' (which i did think was surprisingly pessimistic for a premiere party lol but having seen the quote about hoping ppl still like louis by the end, maybe he is actually a tad concerned! i did obviously say i didn't think it would)

sam was the best at these meetings because he very naturally asks questions back. i told him i loved him in the newsreader as well, and he asked whether i was pirating it (i'm not exactly, i had a vpn). then we all walked off to do that no pain scene experience

after the no pain scene, we exited down some stairs which opened to the second smaller room. assad was behind me so i asked him who did it better (these actors or the show), and we joked about that. he then introduced himself to me, and when i couldn't help noting that i did in fact know who he was, he said he would never want to assume. sam came up to us and assad introduced him to me, and i got the joy of saying we'd met!

(SKIP this bullet if you don't want newsreader vibes-based spoilers) sam asked me what i liked better, iwtv or the newsreader. i said iwtv but that newsreader was great and season 2 was so sad! he said season 3 is the last of the series, and told me it's dark and bleak, worse than season 2, maybe only a second of peace/happiness at the end. so. there's that to look forward to....

he also told me about the crossover staffing between shows (emma and the DOP). i tried to ask if he was responsible for any of that but dont think i articulated it well but he said 'you want to work with the people you like'

my delainey convo was brief, i turned while we were walking up to the no pain thing and realized she was next to me, so just took the opportunity to let her know i was excited about her in next season

around 10-ish, sam and jacob left to (i believe?) go to levan's friends bar, along with hannah and others i didn't recognize. assad and luke were around for another 30-40 minutes after that, then the whole thing ended at 11. i didn't notice when or with who delainey left

delainey, as far as i noticed, did the least mingling; assad and luke did the most. generally speaking (and as expected) sam and jacob hung around together or in the same spaces. also perhaps as expected, assad and luke were hanging around together for lots of the night. at the end of the night, when it felt less burdensome to ask, i got a pic with those two. they were very cool about it, luke was sweet, we'd spoken earlier, he stuck out his tongue for one of the shots and he found me again later to chat

that photocall video i took (above) was after the 'no pain' experience.

#interview with the vampire #iwtv #mine

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blue-jisungs · 5 months

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heyy, how are you doing? hope life's treating you well during the last days of the year 🤚😔

I wanted to request smth but I'm not sure if I should send it here bc I didn't see a link? anyways. I was wondering how would wonwoo or scoups deal with a s/o that hasn't dated nor kissed before and therefore is scared of the commitment and all the pressure that comes with catching feelings? maybe I have a friend who's insecure about that, iykwim

thank you for taking the time<3

firsts (and hopefully, not lasts)

author’s note. hi dear anonnie!! i’m doing good, thank u for asking <3 i hope life was treating you tenderly too!! :D

++ thank u mother @l3visbby for proofreading<33

summary. having a conversation about your worries with wonwoo, who’s understanding and caring

also this turned so self indulgent like 😭😭😭 i relate to all the bitchless single ppl out there fr fr … so worry not, i getchu…. i mean, your friend >_<

word count. ~1,5k

sometimes you wondered how did that happen. that meaning you and wonwoo dating. him, a talented and handsome idol with lots of charisma, good traits and fans. you, being a simple human with an ordinary life.

it was even quite… boring. nothing really happened in your life. highschool, then college. working and studying, an endless cycle. you were never the one to party – or get invited to parties. sure, you got along with your classmates and co-workers (or even their friends!) but you couldn’t help but feel envious when in their early 20s they already had dated, partied and had the fun of their lives.

you met wonwoo while on a vacation on jeju. for something that felt like ages, you decided to take a trip. alone. just with yourself.

while having a lonely stroll around the neighborhood, you stopped to pet a cat. it had a collar, it certainly wasn’t stray - and surely, loved belly rubs. so while you were petting the feline, wonwoo noticed you. heart warming upon seeing the simplicity and beauty of human nature, he stared for a while longer and went back to the place he stayed at.

he passed you a couple of times – on a beach, when you were secretly petting the cat, when you were riding a rented bicycle with wind blowing your hair.

you were cute and wonwoo decided that ‘screw it’ and approached you once you were reading a book under a byeonggeul tree. and the rest was history.

you’ve been dating for almost three months. yet… you haven’t kissed. wonwoo understood that, how could he not? he respected your boundaries and told you to take your time. he didn’t know the reason – that you haven’t kissed anyone, that he was the first guy you held hands with, that he was your first everything. and in moments like these, when the realization hit you like a wave crushing on rocks by the shore, you were terrified. how come you’re 27 and still a loser? bitchless loser, as many of the younger people would say. sure, wonu never made fun of you (simply because you never talked about it or mentioned it to him) but your friends, that knew you for a long time now… you felt it in your bones that they’re making fun of you.

“hey, is everything okay?” your boyfriend’s (gosh, that sounds so beautifully strange. you never thought the possibility of having a boyfriend is something that was actually possible for you) tender voice reached your ears. tearing your dozed-off eyes away from a random spot in the wall, you nodded with a shy smile.

wonwoo sat next to you, placing his warm hand over yours.

“come on, i can see something is bothering you. you’ve zoned out” he snickered and you just send him a smile “you do that a lot lately, you know? is something bothering you?”

‘you. you are the reason of my bothers’ you thought, sighing.

“well…” you started and already knew it was a mistake. wonwoo cocked an eyebrow.

“so there is something” he hummed, satisfied “you know i won’t judge, hm?”

he knew exactly what you were thinking. one would think it’s kind of creepy. actually, you found it adorable. he knew you so well, almost as if you knew each other since childhood.

“i know but… it’s silly” you mumbled and your eyes met his warm, ebony irises. wonwoo fixed his glasses with a swift flick and shook his head. you opened your mouth to say something.

communication is key, they say. you should probably tell him what’s on your mind, right?

you just sighed.

“how do you… bear with me? we… we haven’t kissed and–”

“i hate to interrupt but i’ve told you this. i don’t mind. you being comfortable it’s the most important thing to me and i would hate to lose your trust” he said, a bit sternly but you knew it was pure care speaking through him.

“i know but… i haven’t kissed, wonwoo. like, never. and actually, i’m scared. because this is my first relationship. my parents and friends have this pressure on me… and it’s so draining. ‘you didn’t even kiss yet?’, ‘when are you going to introduce him to us?’, ‘does he take you on dates?’, ‘do you live together?’, ‘are you really committed?’... ‘are you sure you like him?’... and how… how would i know? i’m scared” you burst out suddenly, words leaving your lips like water erupting from a waterfall. you see his eyes widen in shock, lips parting.

“scared of what?” wonwoo asked, blinking slowly “me…?”

“no. yes. i mean, no!” you laugh and see a wave of relief wash over him. then he frowns, so you explain “i’m scared of what you’ll think or… or where we will be in the future. i’m scared to do some things with you but also… kind of excited? i’m scared of committing but i’m also frightened of not committing! like, with all respect, how will i know i love you? do you just wake up one day and know it’s love? i’m scared i’ll get hurt or even worse, hurt you. i don’t know what to do…” your voice died in your throat.

great, you overshared. now he’ll think you’re actually insane.

you could see wonwoo was baffled. you sat in silence for five minutes, his thumb drawing circles on your hand in a soothing manner.

“that’s… a lot to process” nonu let out a small laugh and you smiled.

“i know, sorry. it’s just been on my mind lately” you mumbled. wonwoo brings his leg to the couch, then puts his other hand and grabs both of yours. looking you in the eye with seriousness, you tense a bit. uh oh.

“to be honest, baby…” your boyfriend starts (and the nickname still makes your stomach swirl with butterflies - even though you always thought it would make you cringe. surprisingly, coming from wonwoo’s lips, it doesn't) “it’s hard to answer all of these. i really like you and i truly hope our relationship will last. but human heart is really unpredictable. we don’t know what the future will bring and we can only do our best and hope, it’ll only be positive things”

you nod. you’d like that – wonwoo was a person you could never get tired of.

“i didn’t know i’m your first boyfriend. and… i feel very touched that you trust me enough to share it with me and be with me. if you’re scared that kissing or something will overwhelm you… i’ll do my best to guide you into everything you want. and if you don’t, i’ll understand that” he said and you suddenly feel like crying. your friends always say that men are shit. wonwoo must be a real angel, then.

“i can’t really tell you how you’ll know you love me. everyone realizes in their own time, their own way. i don’t think… i don’t think i’ve ever experienced romantic love, to be honest” the words left his lips and you stared at him in shock “we’re not so different, dear”

you melted, feeling your lower lip start to quiver.

“and… thank you for sharing your worries with me. i’m really proud, you know? you were scared of others’ opinion, what i will think… of your own emotions. and it's normal. it’s understandable, especially in your first relationship. but i’m here for you, okay?” he cooed, his lips forming into a gentle smile.

“you’re not… angry?” you asked quietly. his face morphed into confusion.

“no, why would i be?” he asked, genuinely puzzled.

“well, it kind of sounded like i wanted to break up. which, i don’t of course. but um… you know… a girl tells you she’s scared… i dunno…” you rambled and blew air into your cheeks.

“i’m not, of course i’m not. in fact, i’m happy. i know now how you feel, i know what’s been troubling you. and i just want you to know that… with time, it’ll become natural for you. i mean, i’d hope so” he grinned “also, for the record, i won’t judge your kisses. of course i wouldn’t but… if that makes you more comfortable, then–”

“but be honest, do you even want to kiss me?” you huffed. he giggled, shaking his head.

“duh! what kind of a boyfriend would i be if i didn’t want to kiss my gorgeous partner?” wonwoo asked a - obviously rhetorical - question, squeezing your hand gently. “i do. i really do. but as i said…”

you loosened your hand from his tender hold and smacked his arm jokingly. he looked at you disoriented but with an amused smile.

“take my time… blah, blah, blah. okay. i will, you know it” you said and sent him a serious look “but promise me… if i ever do something wrong, you tell me. right away. like… ‘y/n you’re being a bad partner!’”

wonwoo scoffed and seeing your serious look, he nodded.

“i will. i swear on my love for chan” he said and placed his hand on his heart with a proud smirk.

“awww- wait, what?” you laughed and wonwoo followed along, the comforting sound of your laughters merging together in a beautiful melody.

and you have a strange feeling in your heart. you’re not sure what is it but you’re certain that it’s its way of saying ‘you’re safe with him’.

masterlist <3

taglist. @mirxzii ,, @primoppang ,, @l3visbby ,, @nicholasluvbot ,, @planetkiimchi ,, @weird-bookworm ,, @slytherinshua ,, @kazmura ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @dazzlingligth

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fourmoony · 3 months

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Hiii I hope your doing well !!! I was wondering If you could do james and reader (established relationship) where they are out together somewhere with new people and (like me) reader has a lovely thing called anxiety, I feel like he'd notice right away despite being the opposite. (I'm a sucker for james entirely i need some sweet encouragement from him) I don't know what it is but I tend to feel totally invisible and lonely in Public places, despite being with friends or ppl that i do know. For some reason ppl tend to acknowledge everyone else n leave me out, which I've struggled with for a very long time unfortunately !!

So if you can somehow incorporate that, for me and anyone else who's ever felt that way, that would be great :)) I'll leave it up to youu ♡♡ p.s. I'm obsessed with ur writing

thanks for requesting, angel! <3 1.6k f!reader modern!au

as someone with an overwhelming friend group, learning the difference between not being included and having friends who will just talk into the abyss and if you can keep up, cool, was key lmao

James' hand hasn't left your thigh since you sat down at the table, a sweet encouragement that you relish in. It's a grounding touch, encouraging squeezes here and there when you manage to involve yourself in the conversation. Even when your food had been served, James' touch didn't falter as he stabbed rather uncoordinatedly at his pasta with his left hand.

His thumb moves in small circles against the inside, a distracting touch only in that his hand is dangerously close to disappearing under your skirt. You worry someone will see, get the wrong idea, and that will just send you spiralling for weeks, the awkwardness heavy in your chest. You're an over-thinker, you analyse everything, every movement, every tick of someones jaw, the light of their eyes, the tone of their voice. It's a blessing and a curse, really, your ability to instantly sense change within someone.

You can't help but notice the way that the conversation has carried on without you. Sirius and Remus are bickering, a fire in their eyes that you know very well means they're enjoying it despite their exasperated stances. Further down the table, Lily, Mary, Dorcas, and Marlene are gossiping about someone they went to school with, yelling excited agreements about the person in question, the injustices they must have committed against the girls. Even Peter is louder than normal, caught in a heated debate with James about the upcoming Six-Nations game.

There's not a conversation happening that you feel equipped to join, nor one you've been outright included in. James has assured you multiple times, too many times, in your opinion, that his friends are just loud. You know this - knew this when you agreed to dinner. You love them all. They've always been kind, never cruel. But in the lulling moments, where you realise just how much of an outsider you are in comparison to a group of people who've known each other for over ten years. They grew up together, learned valuable lessons together, have memories that were key, intrinsic moments in their lives. They have a history that you're not a part of.

Sometimes, that feels impossible to compete with. Even when James reminds you that his friends aren't not talking to you, they're just... talking. They're the kind of people to talk to fill a silence, and if you're listening, great. James often calls it 'talking into the abyss'. None of his friends ever actually require a response when talking, they're the kind of people to just keep going until interrupted. Sometimes, even when interrupted.

The table is a loud cacophony of everyone interrupting each other and it has your palms slick and pulse beating in your neck.

The waiter has long since abandoned trying to get you all to close out, even as the dessert plates have been cleared and all that's left are the half-empty, warmed glasses of various alcohols that remain on the table. James must feel you shift in your seat, because he squeezes your thigh in acknowledgement, his eyes flicking away from Peter for half a second. When they land on you, his head turns, conversation long forgotten. Peter doesn't seem fussed, just turns to try and split up whatever row Sirius and Remus are pretending to have.

"All good?" James asks, eyes soft.

His brows are hooked in the middle where they're furrowed, body shifting to face you easier. You nod, lips rubbing against each other. You're scared to talk, scared to be betrayed by your own voice. You've held your own most of the night, you don't want James to forcibly enter you into a conversation. It's not fair on him to have to deal with you, like this.

You should know better, though. James only frowns. It doesn't suit him. Your boyfriend is bright like the summer sun, always smiling, always cheerful. He's the colour between yellow and bright, pure light. Frowning doesn't suit him. It hurts your heart.

His head dips, close to your ear, voice soft as he asks, "You wanna head home?"

"No," You shake your head, frown matching his, "No, Jamie. I'm okay."

His lips press to your cheek, soft and warm, and then he smiles. The heavy feeling in your chest eases a little, just looking at him. James often thinks he has to be proactive to help you in difficult social situations. You've never had the guts to tell him all he has to do is smile real nice at you and just a smidge of that grey cloud budges.

James groans, loud and obnoxious and makes a show of stretching. You avoid looking pointedly at the way his top pulls up his waist at the movement, heat swirling in your cheeks from the mere idea of his skin being on show. Conversations halt for the impending goodbye, and you swear you see relief on Remus' face at not having to be the first to bear the bad news marking the end of the night. He gives you a warm smile that you return, another smidge of that anxiety lifting.

"You off?" Sirius asks over his pint glass.

James nods, "Shattered, yeah."

There's a mixture of goodbye's to both you and James as you sling your coats on. James makes half-hearted plans to see everyone at some point over the next week, gives both of your cuts for dinner to Sirius in cash, squeezes your hand in delight when Lily declares that she'll text you tomorrow to see about coffee. There's a look in her eyes that says she hopes this time you'll accept. She's asked multiple times, sometimes through James, sometimes texting you, herself. She never seems put out when you politely give her some excuse or other, never asks questions as to why the idea jars you so much. You're glad, because you wouldn't have an answer as to why.

The air is cool against your flushed skin when James holds the door and ushers you outside. The sky has turned a dark, midnight blue and you silently wonder how long you actually spent inside the little restaurant. The door swings closed and James is at your side, hand immediately in yours and spreading a calm warmth all over you.

"They really love you, you know?" James speaks thoughtfully.

You should've known your boyfriend would want you to talk about it. You've never had anyone who cares enough, before. But you're trying. Same as he is.

"I love them too. You just," You sigh, shoes scuffing along the pavement as you walk towards James' flat, "You know how I get after too much social interaction."

Your boyfriend hums in acknowledgement, thumb rubbing a soothing pattern across the back of your hand. "I know, lovie. I just wanted to remind you."

"I'm sorry we had to leave."

James halts walking, tugging you back until you're facing him. A passer by mutters something under their breath at the two of you standing in the middle of the street. James doesn't pay them any mind, but your pulse thunders for a fraction of a second at the risk of conflict. James squeezes your hand, "You don't have to apologise. I'm happy you came, and I was ready to leave, anyway."

"You didn't say anything until you noticed I wasn't talking to anyone, though." You counter.

James is silent for a moment, trying to garner the words. Then, "I love when you involve yourself in conversations with my friends. It makes me happy to see you all together. But I'll never force you to do more than you're willing to. We were in there for three hours, love. Any normal person would be exhausted of them, by then."

You huff a laugh, turning to pick up a walking pace again. James follows, allowing the silence to overcome you both as you think of a response. He's so patient, always so patient and sacrificial. You wonder if he'll ever tire of that. The thought scares you.

"Is it too much, for you?" You ask, then clarify, "To feel like you're always keeping an eye on me, saving me from social situations just because I can't function normally."

James' immediate answer is No.

Simple. Plain. It's all the answer you need, but he goes on, anyway.

"Everyone has their thing. Remus is a lot like you. Sirius brings him out of his shell, sure. It's why they're always bickering. But for years, Remus used to just... brood. Wouldn't talk, just observe. Maybe for different reasons, but it was the same thing. He's still here."

You smile. Remus has always been rather lovely to you, almost like he knew, somehow, that his friends can be overwhelming. That social settings can be overwhelming. "So it doesn't annoy you?"

You feel like a child asking for reassurance, but you know James will always give you it, no questions asked. And he means it, too.

"Never. You take part in as much as you want, I'll never be upset with you for saying you've had enough." He tells you, his flat appearing in the near distance.

"I think I'll go for coffee with Lils this week." You announce, feeling pleasantly calm with the admittance.

It doesn't send a spike of anxiety through you like it did when she first asked. Not when you know James won't be cross if you have to leave early, or call him from the bathroom for a get-out. If you become exhausted, if you don't want to be social anymore, it'll be okay. You're sure Lily will understand. You hope she will.

As much as an effort as James' friends have made with you, you feel it necessary to make some in return.

"She'll be over the moon, love." James says, pulling you closer to his side and pressing a kiss to the side of your head.

You smile at the affection, feeling the clouds lift as though James' personality singlehandedly batted them all away. The sun after a storm. You're grateful for it. For him.

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xxresi-rotxx · 10 months

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Harsh Ending pt 3 (NSFW)

Hot damn it's been too f*cking long! I just want to say if you're reading this, ily so much<3 I started this tumblr just to get out the brain rot in my head for this man, and I love having found so many ppl who feel the same<3 enjoy bb;)

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By the time Leon found you, he was fuming. How the fuck had you gotten this far away? From what he knew about this parasite it should have slowed you down if anything, not made you faster.

You were trying your absolute hardest to get your breathing under control. Your breath coming out in short, quick pants. The sound of your blood pumping only increasing in your ears as you kept hearing an unfamiliar voice speak to you. If you weren't so out of breath, you'd be pissed. You were slumped against the base of a tree, fighting to keep your eyes open as extreme exhaustion began to settle its way into your features. You hadn't even heard the agent sneak up on you.

"Y/n?" Leon asked, putting the back of his hand against your forehead, confirming what he already thought.

"Fuck you're burning up. Y/n?" He called your name again.

Leon? Was Leon speaking to you? His voice sounded so faint you weren't really sure.

"Goddammit," Leon muttered under his breath as he went to slide his arms under you, attempting to pick you up. His heart sank a little when you didn't fight him back. No comment, no movement, no resistance from you at all. The parasite was progressing faster than he hoped it would. He had to get you back to Luis and get that medicine in you.

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You woke up feeling groggy as hell and in a bed you didn't quite remember. It wasn't your bed, that was for sure. You didn't really feel as if you had slept either. Your exhaustion fading slightly as you moved to sit up. That's when it dawned on you.

Spain. Ashley. Las Plagas.

Panic immediately set in as you went to reach for your pistol, only to notice it wasn't there. Neither was your knife, or any of your tac gear for that matter.

"Feeling okay?"

Leon's voice startled and calmed you at the same time. He must have taken your tac gear.

"Yeah, just a little tired and," you trailed off, rubbing the back of your neck, feeling how stiff all of your muscles felt.

"Out of it?" He finished for you.

You nodded your head in agreement.

You half expected to see the black veins crawling their way up your arms, but you couldn't find any.

"Luis has medicine, it didn't get rid of the plaga but it should have slowed it down." Leon said, answering the question you were thinking but hadn't asked.

"Y/n," Leon spoke your name, causing you to turn your head and look at him, "you know Luis has a lab here that can remove the parasite."

He wasn't asking you, but you nodded your head anyway, you did know that.

"Why did you run?"

Run? When had you...?

Everything came crashing back to you in an instant. Making your head ache slightly.

You had run, fast too.

Leon already had his suspicions for why you ran but he needed to hear you say it. You were still trying to protect them. Couldn't you get it through your head that your life was just as important?

"Well?" Leon spoke again when you hadn't answered.

"You know why I ran Leon, are you really going to scold me again for looking out for yo-" you cut yourself off "for Ashley."

You knew there was no way he missed what you were about to say.

And he hadn't. But he didn't deserve to be protected, let alone by you. And especially not at the cost of your life.

"If my tactics bother you so much why go after me in this first place?"

This broke Leon right out of his thoughts.

What the fuck had you just said? He couldn't have heard you properly.

"I get you didn't want me on this mission but what I don-"

"No, I didn't want you on this mission."

Leon interrupted you.

"But you have no fucking clue why that is do you?"

Leon was walking towards you now, kneeling beside the bed you were resting on.

"Do you?" He asked again.

"I'm sure it has to do with my lack of protecting-"

"Yourself," again he cut you off, "your lack of protecting yourself. Do you have any idea how fucking nerve wracking it is to have to focus on Ashley when all I'm concerned about is you?"

You could tell Leon was clenching his fists based on how his arms were flexing. There's no way he was saying what you thought he was...was he?

You opened your mouth to respond but cut yourself off. What were you even supposed to say to that? Sorry? Explain please?

You locked eyes with Leon then, your breath hitching in your throat. God, why did he have to be so fucking beautiful? You took a moment to let your eyes wander down to his mouth, picking up on how hard he was breathing. When you trailed your eyes back to his, you could have sworn you saw his pupils get bigger.

"Say you'll stop me."

"What?" you responded, breaking out of your trance.

"Say you'll stop me if I'm wrong about this."

You could see Leon shifting his weight closer to you, getting up from where he was on the floor and moving to sit on the bed.

"I'm not so sure I could stop myself," he adds, "I'm going to need to hear you say it."

Everything finally clicked in your brain. Why he was so furious at you for protecting others over yourself, why he brought you back, why he was so pissed you were on this mission; what he was asking of you right now.

"I'll stop you." You responded in one quick breath, already anticipating what was to come.

"Thank fuck." Leon moved fast, pushing you against the headboard, resting his hands on either side caging you in. His mouth crashing on yours, a low moan emitting from him the second he felt your lips move against his.

The kiss was intense; messy and fast as his lips explored yours. As if he was pouring all of his frustration into this kiss and taking it all out on you.

When you let your tongue slide against his bottom lip you could feel him tense, his grip on the backboard of the bed growing tighter. His lips were so soft and plump, warm and inviting. You wanted to devour him, taste everything he had to offer.

Feeling your tongue Leon eagerly turned the kiss into more. Your tongues wrestling for dominance as you both drank each other in.

Feeling bolder, you placed your hands against Leon's chest, moving your hands up and down feeling all of the taut muscles underneath his shirt. You began moving your hands lower, letting Leon take control of the kiss while your hands were on a mission.

You could feel the sharp intake of breath Leon had, the gasp he emitted once your hands found what they were looking for.

He was so unbelievably hard for you. Painfully so you thought to yourself as you palmed him through his cargo pants.

Leon broke the kiss, letting his head fall to your shoulder as his breath came out in rough pants, his hands still leaning against the backboard.

"Fuck," he panted, voice coming out slightly higher in octave, "God, fuck please don't stop."

You were mesmerized watching how his body reacted to yours. The way his hips moved on their own, finding rhythm with your hand and grinding into you.

"Do you understand now why this mission has been utter torture for me?"

You let out a little giggle, not to mock Leon's torment, but more so because of the inner turmoil you'd been going through ever since your last conversation with the man. How all those feelings of hurt could have been avoided.

"You think that's funny?"

Leon had lifted his head now and was looking down at you, smirk plastered over his lips.

You had no time to respond before Leon trailed his hand down over your sex. The contact through the clothes making you shiver slightly.

You wanted him so fucking bad. You hadn't realized how empty you felt until his fingers started rubbing circles over you. Applying pressure where you needed it most.

"Fuck, Leon." You drawled out, your hips grinding against his hand, similar to how he had been grinding against yours.

He could just picture it. How insane you'd go from being teased and played with, how you would beg for release, all the cute noises that would come out of you; the way your body would react.

He wanted that, no he craved that, but he was losing his patience faster than he would have liked and his cock felt almost painful pressing against the rough material of his pants.

"Le-leon," you rasped, drawing the man out of his thoughts, "I love that you wanna take your time" oh how wrong you were "but if you don't fuck me soon, I think I might actually lose it."

Fuck, you were perfect.

Leon slipped his hands past the waistband of your panties, feeling the evidence of your arousal. You were more than ready.

Leon flipped you over to your stomach, the sudden change in position making you laugh.

"Grab the headboard for me." Leon instructed, his mouth so close to your ear you could almost feel his lips against you.

"Aren't you going to say please?" You teased him.

Leon chuckled, moving his mouth so that he could nibble on your ear, his hands gripping your waist.

"Please Y/n?" He moaned, doing his best to whimper the end of your name.

You grabbed the headboard instantly, your body immediately going flush hearing Leon moan for you. It sent heat straight to your core. You had never heard the man moan, whimper; hell make anything akin to the sound you just heard as he pleaded with you to do as you were told.

Leon had discarded your clothes and was in the process of discarding his own when he decided to slip a finger in, making sure you were fully prepared. The grip he had on his control now completely gone.

Fuuuuck you were tight. His cock already leaking just on how you felt clenching his finger.

Your back arched, your grip on the headboard tightening.

"Leon for fucks sake," you whined, "stop teasing me. I need this, I want this, pleaaase put it in me?" You tried your best to mimic the whiny plea he used earlier.

It worked. Leon slid himself in slowly, the weight of him resting against you, his grip on your waist tightening. Once he was fully in, he gave you a second, a brief one, to adjust.

"Promise me something" he spoke, keeping himself perfectly still.

"Is this really the best time?" you asked, your hips involuntarily twitching.

"Seeing as I think this is the only time you'll actually listen to me?"

You could almost feel the smirk you were sure was on his face, rolling your eyes you replied.

"Make it quick Kennedy."

"That you'll keep yourself safe, otherwise I might seriously fuck up this whole mission."

"I promise, but only if you'll buy me dinner when we get back."

The smirk on Leon's face grew wider, the fear that maybe your attraction to him being only physical slowly vanishing.

"Promise" he whispered against your back.

There was no warning after that. Leon was thrusting into you as if he was certain a lack of contact would kill him. His thrusts fast and deep, finding that spongey part inside of you and hitting it every time.

You could feel your legs start to give way, The messy pace his thrusts were setting, the rough grip he had on your waist, and the little grunts he'd make every time he pulled out just to plunge back in, had you seeing stars.

"Leon I'm cl-"

"Fuck, wait for me, fuck y/n"

You could feel the erratic way his thrusts become rougher, faster.

He was on the edge, and thankfully you were too.

His thumb found your clit, roughly pushing against it and rubbing it in fast circles.

"Come for me y/n"

Your body answering his command without hesitation. The orgasm rocking it's way through you, sending a shiver across your whole body, the sensitivity in your body heightened as Leon's thumb didn't stop.

Just when you thought you'd actually have to remove his hand, both his hands gripped yours against the headboard, holding you to it as he lost himself inside you, his body shivering just the same as yours had.

You let yourself slump against the bed, utterly spent and exhausted. Leon doing the same, his arm coming to rest across you.

You both laid there, listening to the rise & fall of each other's breaths, taking in the moment, knowing soon enough it would be back to the hell that was this mission.

"Hey y/n?" Leon spoke first.

"Hmm?" you responded, so close to falling asleep.

"When we get back, where should we get dinner?"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED LOVELIESSSS! This took me like 2 days to fully finish & proofread lol, incase anyone was wondering lol 😘😘

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code-es · 1 year

Text

The women who laid the foundation of tech

EDIT: I noticed that this post ended up being reblogged by terfs. If you're transphobic this post is not for you to reblog. I want to celebrate everyone who is not a cis man in this industry, including trans women and nonbinary people in tech, and it was my mistake to only include cis women in this post when there are so many trans women and nonbinary people who have done great things in tech as well. Trans women are women and just as important.

Here you can read about trans ppl in tech, and please do:

https://www.thecodingspace.com/blog/2022-03-01-six-trans-programmers-who-shattered-the-lavender-ceiling/

https://abcnews.go.com/Business/transgender-tech-visibility-obstacles-remain/story?id=76374628

The morning of women's day i attended a super inspiring seminar about being a woman in tech at a large tech company in my city, and now I'm inspired to share what I learned with all of you!

I didn't have time to finish this post on women's day, but it's not too late to post now: every day is a day to celebrate women!

Women actually laid the foundation for a lot of the tech industry.

For example, the first computer, ENIAC, was programmed completely by women! While men were the behind the scenes engineers, it was women who did all the actual programming of ENIAC.

The women who made up the team responsible for programming it were called Jean Bartik, Kay McNulty, Betty Holberton, Marlyn Wescoff, Frances V. Spence and Ruth Teitelbaum.

I think one woman who is finally getting her overdue recognition is Ada Lovelace. She was a mathematician (also often referred to as the first programmer) who created the first algorithm in 1842, which wasn't recognized until 1953! However, since none of her machines were ever completed it was never tested in practice during her time.

She has since been celebrated by giants such as google, and she has given name to a programming language (Ada). She was also the first person to write about what is today known as AI. Back when she was practicing, computers were simply thought of as calculators. But she had an idea that if computers can understand numbers, then that can be translated to letters, and in turn that can lead to computers being able to handle words, and eventually even write, draw and create music.

Hedy Lamarr was a famous Hollywood actress in the 40's, but she was also an inventor who laid ground for what we use today for Wi-Fi, Bluetooth and GPS services.

During WW2 she wanted to contribute positviely to the military efforts against the Nazis, and she tried to figure out how to radio control torpedoes. In 1942 she patented her technology "Secret Communications System", also known as frequency hopping, which laid the foundation for the technology we use today for Wi-Fi, GPS and Bluetooth. It wasn't until 1962 that it was first used for its intended purpose, during the cuban missile crisis.

Grace Hopper invented the first compiler, called A-0, in 1955, and was also part of the Univac team, which was the company also responsible for building ENIAC. She also initiated work on the COBOL programming language.

She was also the one to coin the term "bug" in 1947. Computers back then had lights to visualize their working process (which was also a womans idea to implement btw) and bugs would be attracted to the lights, but usually that was no issue - until a bug made its way into a tube which caused the computer to stop working. Hopper taped the bug to a piece of paper and logged what caused the crash - a bug.

Dorothy Vaughan (left), alongside colleagues such as Katherine Johnson (middle) and Mary Jackson (right), was a mathematician at NASA (called NACA when she started) who worked on the orbit for the first ever manned spaceflight and later also on Apollo 11 that would take humanity to the moon!

When Vaughan started at what was then called NACA, segregation was still prevalent in the US and she was not allowed in the same areas in the office as her white colleagues. Another department was formed for the black staff, and when the director of said department unexpectedly died, she was appointed as the new director and thus became the first ever black woman at that position at NACA/NASA. In 1958 when NACA becomes NASA segregation is forbidden, and that is when Vaughan and her colleagues Johnson and Jackson started working on programming the orbit and later also Apollo 11.

Continuing on the same track of NASA and space, Margaret Hamilton was the Apollo project's first actual programmer. Hamilton became the director of software engineering at NASA in 1965, and she was also the person to first coin the term !

In the image above, she stands next to all the handwritten code that was used to send humanity to the moon. During the early stages of the project when she would speak of "sofware engineering", software development was not taken as seriously as other forms of engineering, and it wasn't regarded as a science, either. She wanted to legitimize software development as an engineering discipline, and overtime the term "software engineering" gained the same respect as any other technical discipline.

And lastly, if you're a woman in STEM, I want to highlight and celebrate you! Being a woman in a male dominated industry is not easy, we often suffer from sterotype threat and are not seen as our own individuals, but rather "the woman" in a room full of men. But just as these women, I'm sure you will achieve greatness!!

Here are some additional resources if you'd like to learn more:

https://www.history.com/news/coding-used-to-be-a-womans-job-so-it-was-paid-less-and-undervalued

https://digitalfuturesociety.com/programming-when-did-womens-work-become-a-mans-world/

And this was mainly my source for this post, but it's unfortunately only available in Swedish:

Thank you for reading ✨

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sergle · 7 months

Note

People are failing to realize that clothing, and cameras for that matter, can be fairly deceptive. I don't wanna say deceptive because it carries a certain connotation, but I hope you'll know what I mean. I look fairly "thin/avg" with a shirt on, but without it it's rolls and folds lol

Furthermore, it's wild to assume someone who's pretty passionate about accurate plus-size rep would be stick thin. Maybe their metric of "average" is skewed or something, but it's still weird to just show up in a strangers Asks and assume things about them and their bodies.

sorry for answering an ask about this like 4 days later but I'M STILL THINKING ABOUT THIS... this person is talking about these asks btw.

FIRST OF ALL, thank you so much for the ask, it really is good to know that other ppl are aware of the Covering Of Fat With Clothing. Like. hi. my body is obscured. people are just noticing my torso for the first time bc there isn't 5lbs of breast tissue hanging off of it. SECOND OF ALL. This is still making me insane. I am still thinking about it so I'm gonna completely just do a brick of text to talk about it. Like, there's the first part of this, right? The fact that, all of these people who were sending asks like these, are the same people who came to my account because they liked the body positivity stuff or they related to the proportions of the girls I draw, right? And yet somehow managed to miss that ALL OF MY ART IS ME. So you're relating to MY body, AGREEING that this is plus sized art, then turning towards moi and saying, okay but you're skinny though. HUH? HMM??? I literally made a 12-part series of self portraits that have been like, my most seen, most stolen, reposted, enjoyed, stolen again, pieces. And I've been so crystal clear that these are literally me. Once again, I'm pointing at the aforementioned MATERIAL.

Pictured above: a thin, skinny woman who just happens to have large breasts, ig! And outside of those, which are *literal* self portraits, I've spoken lots of times before about how I make girls of a certain size and shape because I'm modeling them off myself. Or as close as I can get, depending on how good/bad I feel and if I took a photo to ref or not. It really couldn't be clearer that this is obviously me being self-serving, I do it when I feel like I need to see it. So the thing being implied here, or flat out accused in a handful of messages, is that I'm drawing fat girls forrr clout? AWESOME. I didn't want to dignify every message but that did seem to be the rough consensus. BUT I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THAT ONE TOO. WHEN would it become a bad thing for a skinny person to draw body positive art? In a positive light? Even if it was for clout? Am I going insane? That would be Good. It honestly might be even more meaningful than what I'm doing now. If I was actually 115 pounds soaking wet, if I looked like that one girl from ANTM with the like 14 inch waist, and I was out here making the exact same art, would that make the art LESS meaningful to other fat girls? That someone who doesn't have this body type or relate to it at all found it beautiful enough to draw it so many times, treating the subject with respect? Fat people being the subject of art again? The cycling of a trend that's been gone too long? That is, I thought, what we've literally been begging to see. I have been thinking about this. And finally, the last part of it that's been vexing and haunting me:

Is it supposed to be my responsibility that someone gets dysmorphic LOOKING AT ME. HUHHHH. On the art account where I draw a lot of Me. HUH. I was meant to anticipate this? Looking at pictures of me. And that makes you feel dysmorphic. and that is my fault. I'm just double checking. On the account where I draw bodies that I relate to, that you followed because you relate to. And then seeing me. Makes you dysmorphic. Whew. Got it.

I'm putting a bow on my insane winding ramble about this. Or at least trying to, now. It is wild to have my body commented on so much. This year, bc of the breast reduction, comments on my body have increased a hundredfold. Positive, negative, passive aggressive, predatory, all of the ways it can go. There was a really obvious way to rebuff these particular comments, which would be to post a picture of myself where my body ISN'T mostly obscured. But hey, those aren't free. The art will have to do for now. I wouldn't be that surprised if half the messages were jokes meant to see if I'd post pics "proving" that I look how I look. I also thought briefly about like, what if my body did change that drastically? Would some ppl's immediate reaction be betrayal, disgust, anger? I've been sick in my life before and lost weight at alarming speeds. But I've still been fat all my life. I've gotten sick and gained weight at alarming speeds. Does my presence as a "body positive artist" mean that my body gets to be put on trial anytime it changes? Does the switch flip from "your fat art means so much to me" to "you're not in the club anymore, since you got rid of your breasts, you look different"

Anyway I thought it would be funny to draw a thin girl "drawing" a scrap sketch I already have on hand. And imagining someone's response being fully negative, bc a thin person drawing fat ppl would be somehow dishonest lmao. Look how evil this bitch is. Her body doesn't match her art.

#IGNORE ME it does not matter. but I wanted to talk #sergle.txt #I wanted to talk SO BAD.#sergle answers #long post

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rhiaarrow · 3 months

Text

I've seen ppl talking abt it on twitter and here and I wanted to sort of contribute my thoughts towards it,

Ppl aren't 'forgetting' about qTubbo's death. It's just that the situations of qBad and qTubbo's deaths, while they had the same outcome, were completely different for multiple factors.

(This isn't targeted at the ppl who think the death is being overlooked because that's their analysis and it's totally fair. It's just that people saying that got my analyst brain drawing comparisons between the deaths and I ended up with this big wall of text so...yeah :') )

1 - The build up (from outside POVs)

With qTubbo from most Povs he just sort of... died with no clear build up. Most ppl didn't see the true extent of his self spiralling because he hid it or they just simply didn't spend a lot of time with him in order to pick up on the stuff that we the viewers picked up on. And then all of a sudden he just died with no obvious lead up (unless you watch his pov in which case there was an obvious lead up) but from outsiders who barely saw him, it just happened.

Whereas

With qBad there was a more obvious build up on other Povs, he told the ppl he loved he was dying or at least they knew that something was wrong. They knew that his death was inevitable and as much as they hate to admit it a lot of them had already come to terms with the fact that he would be gone soon. (Again unless you watch his pov the whole build up from the past few months is less obvious but it was more developed with other players before his actual death) Most Povs at least recognised that there was something wrong with the blue spreading across his face because well...it was pretty fucking obvious

2 - The way they told people

qTubbos "I'm an egg, I only have one life left." while true sounds like a joke because well... he's obviously not actually an egg. Ppl joke abt stuff like that the whole time, the Eggboyhalo joke for example or calling Foolish 'egg coded' early in the server. How were all players meant to immediately go 'ah yes, this player is definitely an egg. Yesyes, this makes perfect sense'. It's easy to see how it wasn't taken seriously by a lot of characters when only a few of them were ever given an actual explanation besides "yeah I've only got one life"

Whereas

qBads "I'm fine, don't worry about me." while actively coughing up a lung, covered in blue infection and regularly having memory issues is an obvious lie. Even if people only saw him for a couple of minutes or even seconds it was pretty damn hard to ignore the blue spreading on his body. They'd ask what it was, he'd try to avoid it or redirect them and that person was hit with an immediate red flag of 'oh, so something is wrong with Bad.' which most shelved away and didn't actively investigate but it caused many characters to express being worried about him

3 - Outward visibility

qTubbo died due to his internal issues; self doubt, lack of self worth, suicidal tendencies, etc (I feel bad writing etc but I know there were other factors I just can't remember them) which resulted in him chosing to live using the life system and later chosing to gamble his last life in a game of Russian roulette with Richas.

(None of this being clearly outwardly visible to bystanders even if he wanted them to notice)

Whereas

qBad died due to external issues; parts of his soul physically leaking out of wounds on his body which caused his body to degenerate so far that even as an immortal he couldn't hold on and stop his corporeal body from just giving out on him and forcing him to reset.

(Which was very clearly outwardly visible despite how much he tried to hide it)

4 - The methods of their return

(Honestly I think this part is what's making ppl think that qTubbo's death is being 'ignored' compared to qBads)

With qTubbo, Creation told them that in order to 'restore' him they need smth that they CANNOT craft. Creation did not elaborate further, so they have very little to work with/very little they can actually do in order to try and help him. So most players while they have expressed they want to help, they know that if they do try to help they'll be running at brick walls because they just cannot obtain what is needed and they need to just wait for Creation to show up again.

Whereas

With qBad they know he'll be back (because he's a demon and that's just how they work) and they know what they have to do. They have to wait and be patient when he does return because he might not remember them and he'll probably need pictures to remember. He told them all of this before he died.

On one hand you have qTubbo: Wait for a prompt from Creation or an NPC to help them craft the item to get him back

On the other you have qBad: Wait for him to come back on his own terms

And for the people used to Bad providing a metaphorical example to prove his point in a clearer manner;

When playing a video game you have more hope when waiting for a loading wheel to stop spinning so you can play the level, than you do looking at a level blocked behind a currently unobtainable paywall :/

In other words, dwelling on things you don't know how to fix sucks ass and no one likes thinking about it until they have a tangible idea for a solution and right now only one of the two deaths has an even remotely tangible solution even if it is just to wait and do nothing.

(I understand that ppls reactions to qBads death have seemed more proactive than qTubbos right now but today was the first qBagi and Em learned of him actually dying so it makes sense that today was sort of centered around that. Tbh it just sucks that qTubbo died on an event day bc I feel like if he didn't we would've got a lot more focus and angst out of it but what can you do. But also it's seemed a lot more proactive because qBads kids are actively searching the server for him for 3-4 hours a day which is just depressing as hell, kudos to Pommin and Dapmin for pulling that off :') )

Wall of text over!

Have a flower for your troubles, after all our cubitos have done to us, I think we've earned some flowers without angsty connotations ;-;

❀❀❀❀❀

#qsmp #qsmp badboyhalo #qsmp tubbo #qsmp lore #qsmp analysis #tw death #cw death #these cubitos istg i just wanna squish them for how much angst they've created #also this isnt aimed at anyone just the posts i saw abt the death being ignored got me thinking abt their situations #how can 2 deaths be so different when they literally have the same end result of: they'll be back eventually #they're too addicted to perma die xD #but goddamn #tw suicide mention

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some-mari-thoughts · 3 months

Text

DON'T KNOW THE FULL OMORI STORYLINE? TURN AWAY HERE

You heard me? Aight.

Designs for people who didn't notice my other posts ^^

Spoilers start UNDER THE CUT.

OMORI cast as Iterators! In order , Sunny, Omori, Mari, Hero, Aubrey, Basil and Kel. I will post more about them later in reblogs, tagged #Rain World and #OMORI Iterator AU

I will have to sleep soon so just base info for now ^^

They have So much lore. I might answer asks (with aforementioned tags)

For ppl who don't care about RW spoilers: Iterators - supercomputer artificial gods, made to work on The Problem forever. I assume there are 3 generations based on eras they were built in and 4th for experimental models The Problem - Immortality, a cycle of resurrection. everything respawns in that world and its a real thing The Solution=Triple Affirmative - a way to stop the cycle of resurrection/reincarnation, that is generally applicable, and is possible. That isn't another way that they already found but don't like The Core/Rarefaction cell - eternal source of energy for an iterator. There is usually one or several and we don't know how many. I assume 1. Ancients - old civilization that built the iterators and moved to live in Colonies on top of them as the surface became uninhabitable Mass Ascension - All Ancients going and using the old way to exit the cycle that they didn't like. Essentialy giving iterator projects up but leaving them to solve the problem for the rest of the world.

#Rain World #OMORI Iterator AU #OMORI Rain World crossover #.......................... what do i tag this even #OMORI spoilers #Rain World spoilers

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dudadragneel · 2 months

Text

Hello, guys! It's me!

Since my creativity is off the roof, I am here to gift you with another Chan Sickfic!

Enjoy!

This one was 🍎's request!

Hi hi I’m new to ur account I get the sense that you write hurt comfort fics (thanks btw) it’s so rare to find ppl who appreciate that on here. I also saw that you take requests so I wanted to try my luck here. Can I request a fic where Chan is having a hard time with the whole long distance thing because he’s used to being w reader all the time and he’s been feeling sick and nauseous all day and so he can’t help but call reader in the middle of the night and She immediately knows something is wrong because he’d never usually call that late. She manages to get him to admit what’s wrong and tries to help him over the phone but he has to hang up to throw up. Then reader gets emotional because she can’t be with him when he feels so sick. So she drives all the way to be with him that night.

SO CLOSE YET SO FAR

Chan had been dating you for a few good years now and despite his packed schedule, he made sure to find time to be with you as much as possible. You had offered him to live with you but he politely declined stating that the kids needed him.

He had many reasons to try to be with you as much as possible, one was because he loved you with all his heart and the other was because he felt relaxed when he was with you. You provided him the same comfort he provided to the kids, STAYs, and you.

And the good point of all this was that you lived relatively close to the dorm so it was easy to come and go to each other's house.

However, there were times when he had schedules overseas that you couldn't attend, although you tried your best to accompany him as much as possible. Sometimes you had to travel to other cities away from your house and his dorm. And these were some of the hardest for both of you.

Today was no different, you were about 1hour away from the dorm, working on a new project and messaging Chan all the time, to make sure he was okay and talk about how your days went.

It had been 3 days since you left and he was starting to feel it, being used to seeing you almost every day, and considering how overwhelmed he was with his role as a leader, it wasn't easy for him.

And the cherry on top, he didn't know if he caught a bug, or if it was the food but his stomach began feeling weird during the afternoon. He noticed it as he was working in his bedroom, and it was gurgling loudly, making him burp every once in a while, but he managed to ignore it as much as he could and continued to work.

Then came dinner time, and he was feeling a little worse than before, a slight nausea starting to build up. But he needed to eat, or the boys would suspect something was wrong and the last thing he always wanted was to worry the kids.

And just like during the afternoon, he sat through dinner managing to eat an amount of food his stomach clearly didn't want or needed at that moment.

When he was done he went back to his room and the boys went to their bedrooms to sleep, being as exhausted as always.

Again, Chan continued to work on the songs despite his now more than obvious discomfort, his stomach angry at him for eating. If you were there, you'd keep him from working and get him to relax a bit, even if he didn't tell you he was feeling a bit sick.

As the night went on, he started feeling sleepy, he could no longer pay attention to the songs, and due to that they weren't turning out the way he wanted. Remembering that one time when this same process happened and he had a panic attack, he decided to call it a night and go to bed. He knew you'd be sleeping by now so he didn't call you but sent you a good night message.

He lay down on his bed and surprisingly, despite his stomach being angry at him, he fell asleep quite fast.

But about an hour later, the mild nausea he was feeling after having dinner, had now gotten strong. He woke up but didn't move from his position, and just felt his stomach churning and noticed he was a little too sweaty for cold weather.

He lifted himself up and drank a sip of cold water before lying down again.

However, that was far from being his smartest decision in life. That sip of water proved to be the last straw as the nausea got even worse and his stomach started contracting. His mouth started filling with saliva, a clear indicator that he would eventually throw up. But he knew that that could wake up some of the boys and the last thing he needed right now was his kids being worried about him.

He squeezed his eyes and covered them with his arm, the other resting on his stomach in an attempt to ease the churning feeling. His dinner and what felt like everything he ate that day were swirling inside, apparently jumping from time to time.

He tried his best to take deep controlled breaths as you did with him before but it wasn't exactly working.

Then once more saliva took over his mouth and he started swallowing convulsively, trying to keep everything in for as long as possible.

But he barely managed to control the urge when his stomach contracted one more time making a strong statement that if he didn't go to the bathroom right now, he'd be sick in his bed.

He grabbed his phone and got up, almost immediately regretting his decision as the motion seemed to have upset him even more.

Chan made his way to the bathroom with a hand clamping his mouth as strong as he could so he didn't vomit before reaching the bathroom.

He went to the sink and grabbed the edges tightly, trying to control his body. Looking at the mirror, his face was a bit pale and his curly hair was stuck to his forehead.

He ducked his head and squeezed his eyes taking deep breaths again, swallowing down whatever it was that was threatening to come out. He didn't want to be sick.

After a few agonizing minutes, his stomach seemed to have given him a break, with the nausea decreasing a little. Sometimes he'd deal with this on his own but now, not having you there with him was just worsening the situation. He didn't like the kids seeing him sick, but with you, his walls came down a little easier. And he so desperately needed you.

Yet still reluctant, he grabbed his phone and called you.

You woke up as soon as the phone rang and upon seeing who was calling you, you knew something was really wrong. Chan would never call you in the middle of the night unless he felt really bad.

- Baby? What's wrong?

- Hey, honey. Nothing, I'm fine...I was just missing you.

You could immediately notice that he was in the bathroom.

- Chan, please be honest.

- I am being honest. I was working on some music and then I remembered you-

He was cut off by a queasy burp he managed to muffle.

- Oh sweetie. We've been through this before. You don't have to be strong all the time, you don't have to put up a front with me, you can be weak.

No matter how much he wanted to hide how he was feeling, he'd called you for a reason and he felt safe with you.

- I don't feel good...

- What's happening?

- I've been feeling nauseous since the afternoon...

- Did you throw up? I can see that you're in the bathroom.

- No. I don't want to. I don't want to wake the kids.

Again he covered a queasy burp that brought up a small amount of liquid that he managed to swallow.

- Oh honey.

He closed his eyes and swallowed hard at the awful increasing feeling of dread that he was about to throw up.

You were getting anxious seeing him like this and being away, you had so little power to help him right now but you tried.

- Hey, baby. Listen to me, take deep breaths. With me, come on.

He tried following you through the phone, as you breathed with him. But it wasn't working.

You could see his expression changing, you noticed he'd gone a little green. He closed his eyes one more time and his his face on his arm, trying to control his body and you could see his Adam's apple bobbing up and down consecutively. You feared the worst and it happened.

Chan felt hot liquid rush up his throat and hit the back of his throat and he knew he wouldn't be able to hold it in this time.

When he felt his mouth filling he hurriedly hung up and reached for the toilet spilling out his dinner and a wet burp that followed brought a thicker stream of partially digested food.

You were taken aback when he hung up and started getting stressed over the fact that you weren't there for him. Your heart was almost beating out of your chest of worry and tears started swelling up in your eyes.

You knew he wouldn't ask the kids for help and you were worried this could escalate to a worse situation.

So you made the wisest decision at the moment, grabbed your stuff, and left a note to your friend, whose house you were staying at.

You decided to take the 1hour drive in the middle of the night to be with Chan because he needed you and he would only admit it to you.

In the dorms, Chan was on his second bout of vomiting all of the meals he had that day. He had a few breaks in between the rounds of vomit.

But to his demise, one of the members woke up to get water and heard retching sounds coming from the bathroom and noticed Chan's bedroom door open.

He knew the elders wouldn't want them worrying about him but he couldn't just sit still.

- Hyung? Chan-hyung?

Changbin said softly trying to knock on the door as quietly as possible.

Chan gulped down and tried to answer.

- 'm fine- Changbin-ah.

Changbin knew he wasn't and he wanted to help but he also knew Chan would be reluctant about it.

And as if on cue, you arrived at the dorm.

- Y/n!

- Hey, Changbin.

- What's wrong with Chan hyung?

- He's not feeling well. I'll take it from here, you can go back to sleep.

You said smiling and tapping his shoulder, he obeyed you and went back to his room.

You knocked on the bathroom door.

- Honey? It's me. Can I come in?

He wanted to answer but his stomach decided that he wouldn't as he retched wetly over the toilet and you took that as a sign to enter.

When you got in, you saw Chan leaning over the toilet vomiting for what seemed to be the third time, given how sweaty and red he was.

You rushed to him and kneeled next to him, one hand holding his head and his hair out of his eyes and the other rubbing his back up and down.

He barely looked at you when another gag brought a wave of putrid brown liquid immediately followed by another one.

- Oh baby...

You gently leaned his head on your shoulder and grabbed his hand which he squeezed in return, his other hand gripping his abdomen.

- It hurts so much...

- What happened? Is anyone else sick?

- No...just me...

- It could be a stomach bug...

He suddenly hissed, squeezing your hand even more and you kissed the top of his head as your hand kept rubbing his back.

- You're gonna be okay. I'm right here with you now, okay?

- thanks...

His back started heaving up and down under your touch and you could hear his stomach gurgle loudly. He gagged a few times, clamping his mouth and still squeezing your hand to ground himself and not break down.

- Honey, I know it hurts. You need to let it out. Hm?

You said, rubbing his lower back and comforting him as much as you could.

His stomach jumped rather aggressively and he got away from your embrace reaching the toilet in time for another wave to come out. He coughed a few times until a wet retch brought up even more, the sound of liquid hitting liquid repeatedly making you grimace a little. And you could see it wasn't being easy on him, the veins on his neck were popping up and he was getting red as well.

- Breathe, honey, breathe.

You didn't stop rubbing his back not even once. He rested his head on his arm, his nose was runny and his eyes were watering.

You carefully brushed his curly hair out of his face, looking at him with gentle eyes.

- Do you think you're done?

- No...it's still churning...

- Can I go get some cold water for you?

- I don't want you to leave...

This sentence showed how much he let himself be vulnerable when he was with you, he needed you by his side.

- Okay. I won't leave.

You grabbed your phone and texted Changbin who would probably still be awake now that he knew Chan wasn't well.

- Changbin. Are you sleeping?

- No. Do you need anything?

- Can you get some cold water? Please?

- Sure. And how's Chan hyung?

- He's still vomiting. I think he might've caught a stomach bug.

- I'll be right there.

Changbin knocked on the door before entering holding a glass of cold water.

- Thank you.

- Thanks, Changbin-ah.

The leader said weakly, trying to give a faint smile, to which Changbin returned.

- Text me if you need any help.

- Will do.

You turned to face Chan who had turned green and was swallowing again and you noticed he was actually holding it in while Changbin was in there.

- Honey...you didn't need to do that...

You said as he ducked his head one more time retching up another wave of what seemed to be the food from yesterday. The mess inside the toilet was unsettling, and it was definitely not helping with the situation, as well as the stench.

You pulled him back and while still rubbing his back you flushed the toilet.

You helped him so now he wasn't kneeling anymore and was sitting down. He rested his head on his hand while you held the other and rubbed his back from side to side.

- Here, baby. Rinse your mouth and take small sips.

- Thank you...

He said with a raspy voice that seemed to be hurting his throat. He rinsed his mouth and then drank a little bit, handing you the bottle.

- How are you feeling now?

'm still nauseous...

- Do you wanna try to take something and go to the bedroom?

- Not yet... I can feel something trapped...

As if on cue, whatever it was that was stuck triggered a sequence of gagging and retching and he was leaning over the toilet again. The unproductive gags turned into productive ones, with one wave following after the other. You were seriously surprised by how there were still things to come out.

- oh sweetie, I think it's really a stomach bug.

You said rubbing his back and supporting his forehead while he proceeded to vomit a few more times, the sounds of retching, wet burps, and liquid hitting liquid taking over the bathroom.

After what seemed to be 1h hour since he ran to the bathroom, his stomach decided to give him a break, although maintained the nausea. He was exhausted, completely drained, and if you weren't there he'd probably sleep in the bathroom.

He got away from the toilet leaning all his weight on your chest.

- Honey, do you think you're done?

- I hope so...I'm still nauseous but I don't feel like throwing up, at least not now.

- Wanna go lie down?

- Yes...

But when he moved to try standing up, he noticed how dizzy he was feeling.

- Okay, okay, it's ok. Sit down and take deep breaths.

He did as you told him but he felt completely empty, like he had thrown up a week's worth of meals.

- Do you want me to get Changbin?

- No, there's no need to. Just give me a minute.

You just sat there, rubbing his back and his hand as he tried to recollect himself so he could go back to his now-so-desired bed.

A few minutes after, he was okay to stand up and go back to his bedroom. You helped him up, wrapping your arms around him to help him steady himself.

- You good?

- Yeah...

- Sure? Because if you faint I can't carry you, Babe

You said laughing a little and he chuckled back at you.

- I won't.

- Okay.

You walked slowly with him, stopping at the sink so he could brush his teeth and he ended up vomiting a thin stream of bile and stomach juice but it seemed to be the last of it.

- Let's get you to the bedroom.

You still had your arms wrapped around him as you guided him to the bedroom.

You pulled the covers and helped him lie down and then covered him.

- I'll get a hoodie for myself, okay? And a bucket, just in case.

- Okay.

You had come in such a hurry and you were clearly tired you didn't want to open your bag to get clothes, and his were more comfy and had his scent.

He was lying down looking at you, smiling at how cute you looked with his oversized hoodie.

- Come here.

He said tapping the spot on the bed next to him, with the cutest smile.

You lay down next to him, looking into his eyes, and gently caressed his hair.

- I love your curly hair.

- And I love your eyes. They are beautiful, pure, sincere.

He said as he caressed your cheek. He then grabbed your hand and placed a kiss on it.

- Thank you for being here.

- I'm happy to be here.

You responded and then you told him to come closer so you could cuddle him.

- I'll be the big spoon today.

- I'm fine with that.

You kissed the top of his head, covered yourselves with the blanket, and stroked his back until he was fast asleep.

Chan was happy to have you and the kids and he could proudly say that all of you were his lifeline.

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ave661 · 1 year

Text

Art theft in COD community

This is something that has been on my mind for a long time, but I didn't have the courage to say it out loud. Lovely @namedlunagoddess uploaded tik tok and it motivated me to write this post.

I've been fighting with art theft lately, like many artists in cod community. People don't appriciate our hard work and use us for their popularity. From what I noticed, a lot of them follow my accounts, because when I upload something, they quickly repost it on pinterest or tiktok without credits. Pls understand me, I do it all for free. One render can take me several hours or more. For example, I spent 2 days on the last one, because I didn't like how it was turning out and started from scratch several times - when I share something, I want to be fully satisfied with it. It is EXAUSTING when you need ask for the bare minimum (credits) and even then you're not listened.

You probably noticed that I upload everything in lower and lower resolutions with bigger and bigger watermarks. These are not full pics - I crop them to non-standard resolutions, and 16:9 are only on my Patreon, because I'm sick of art theft. Why? I had a few cases of people selling my art as designs for t-shirts, phone cases, stickers, etc. Previously, I tried to hide watermarks so that they would not be so eye-catching, but people were using it against me. Tik tok and Pinterest are the biggest-*censored* For example, this is what happens when ppl don't give credits and edit out my watermarks

Then they end up on pinterest with thier tik tok name:

Good examples of giving credits (I LOVE ALL OF YOU AND THANK YOU!! ♥)

DO NOT REPOST

Another thing that annoys me is reposts of my art, even here on tumblr. When you do that, you are taking away my credits. I try to make everything available on different platforms, but I guess it still doesn't help. Most people can't read watermarks and will assume that if you upload it - you are the author.

It takes me 6 hours (on average) to make one render, and it takes you 6 seconds to write credits. Please respect my work, because more and more I want to drop everything and stay only on Patreon.

Sometimes I feel that what I do is not appreciated. I don't want much, and yet I feel like everything is being taken away from me. EDIT: I don't mean using my art as an inspiration to fanfics, headcanons, banners etc. If You give me credits - we're good, so no worries! Use them as much as You like ♥♥♥

#cod #call of duty #respect the artist #art theft

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olderthannetfic · 7 months

Note

I wanna name two of dumbest reasons why ppl hate BL Imo. Unrealistic sex: Oh you fucking mean like 90% of all the romance and smut novels? Weird sex isn't anything special, come back to me when you've read those old Granny romance smuts with Fabio's Butter on the cover. Sex/Fetishism: I feel like this one is super dishonest tbh. It makes it seem like people only read BL for the sex, and to sexualize male couples. It's like the main attack point and it's so stupid. Yeah there's no smut here this almost 2000 page novel with zero smut... because you wanna read smut... yeah checks out. Or it's not even a main selling point of the novels, but clearly you're reading this 5 book plot heavy story, with 800+ pages just for those 10 pages of smut somewhere. Yeah that makes sense. Let me be frank, how many people do only read the BL for the sex? I mean genre unspecified. Unless it's a clear smut story I often view the sex portrayed as the same tool as characters kissing or holding hands, it happens, it's there, it better payoff for the characters in some plot/character growth relevant way. In recent years the biggest BL novels I noticed were all plot heavy and smut/sex was either a part of the plot, or didn't even exist. And that's only in books, the adaptions had ZERO sex and people still went crazy for the story, before they even knew it was BL. (You fucking know which books/adaptions I'm talking about.) Yeah there are pure smut novels, but then we're also right back at the point in the prior point: It ain't anything special that horny shit exists. It's not a sin or bad that horny shit exists either, I'm just pointing out how stupid it is to boil down an entire genre to "rabid horny women wanting to see dudes smashing dicks" when so many BL stories who get more mainstream popular don't focus on sex, instead having a solid plot and interesting characters.

The reasons people hate BL generally boil down to "Wah, women are liking things and enjoying themselves!" and, where applicable, "Asian stuff has cooties".

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fkinavocado · 7 months

Text

DADDY ISSUES ANNOUNCEMENT

ok guys. let's recap. i've been writing on this fic since august 2021. i was gearing up to wrap it up for its 2 year anniversary in august, but my mental health got in the way of writing in general, not just for this fic.

however, there has been another major block in my way.

many of you might remember this if you've been around long enough, but i got a lot of backlash at one point in the story. some felt it wasn't going in the direction they had hoped for (a typical happy ending, picket fence, kids, etc- the whole package).

and ever since, this has been bothering me- but not just because of the obvious reason (which is, that this is my fic and i should get to decide what the storyline is ultimately, and who doesn't resonate can just move on instead of sending me hate for something i share on here for free and for us all to enjoy- me writing it, and you, hopefully, reading it)

no, the real, or should i say, bigger reason is that i was upset with myself.

because, honestly... i wanted to end the fic where part 1 ended!

but... i gave into the pressure. so many ppl were pleading for more, and although the initial plan was to just write extras going forward, little check-ins mainly based on prompts, i felt like i owed it to you all to give you the happy ending everyone was rooting for... when, in reality, i'd meant for it to have an open ending all along.

yes, the check-ins would have had them be together etc, but no major plot developments such as... getting married, babies, etcetc. because i just didn't want to give them a typical story. i wanted this to be based on their dynamic, their relationship, them working on it, but not have it be the traditional story with a happily ever after.

(very many insisted a lot on the baby plotline, and maybe that's why i went with that twist in the story... because i didn't see it for them in the immediate future. and writing it in a linear timeframe without too many timejumps meant that i had to find a workaround... which only infuriated people more!)

so i'be been debating this for months now... should i go on and just wrap it up in a lame way that i didn't feel did the story justice (aka another timejump where they're finally settled, have a kid and another one on the way, and describe their happily ever after) orrrrrrrrrrrrrr backtrack to where i feel i deviated from my original plan, and take off part 2 and 3.

basically, go back to where they were on his front porch and part 1 ended:

Harry looked at you for a long moment, towering over you- you could barely see his facial features in the dark.

But what you could make out clearly was the glistening in his eyes and the way his lips turned ever so slowly into a smile, his dimples on display. He was so handsome when he smiled, it hurt.

You slowly smiled in return, your worried expression fading away, and you just stared at eachother like that, smiling after months of nothing but.

You didn’t need to say anything, your eyes had their own secret language. Once more, your bodies were doing the talking for you.

He held out the palm of his hand.

And… you knew.

this... this is how i wanted the main story to end. and then to just write extras, prompts you guys send in, whatever you wanted to see more of- but maybe not them having kids etc because fjdhfksd this is just not that kind of story to me! i just wanted this to be about them, the two of them rekindling their relationship after so much time apart and all they'd been through!

so... i finally took the decision, and as a result, you may have noticed that just the first 25 chapters are still listed in the masterlist (essentially, just part 1)

this was a hard decision, one i've been debating for ages, because, well... i hated having to just erase so many chapters. chapters i worked on, chapters i still see as genuine and true to their story but just... not what i wanted to write for them as a whole. i wanted to just focus on little moments. not have it be a chronological recount of their story, going further.

i had to let go of so many special moments that i loved writing! who knows... maybe i'll save some of them and integrate them into extras

that is, if any of you still want me to keep writing extras for them! i know many will still want to see snippets of them, but i am well aware most have probably given up on this fic and i honestly don't blame them. it's taken me forever to reach this decision, but honestly, i'm taking the advice of so many lovely people who came into my inbox along the years and encouraged me to stay true to what i'd envisioned for them in the first place

so this is me doing that ❤️i love their story, and all the love you guys have for it and it's just so so special to me. i couldn't bear giving it an ending that would just feel like i was wrapping it all up and putting a pretty bow on top when i have so much i wanted to explore with them, otherwise. thank you all for your patience and all your kindness. it means a lot, and i hope this news makes you happy because... it makes me happy knowing i stayed true to myself in the end.

now i can finally move on and write more for them. let's have some fun! if needed, go back and at least give chapter 25 a re-read so you know where things left off. i'm still not doing well mental health wise so please bear with me- i'm trying. i promise i am. i desperately wanna write, i love writing. writing extras is so much easier logistically- little fun check-ins that i don't have to overthink. i'm hopeful that this will prove to be the right decision going further ❤️

#daddy issues #harry styles fanfic #harry styles smut #daddy harry

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luxxid · 1 year

Note

idk if you’ve seen the candy necklace trend but i’d love to see how you think different genshin men would react to the reader trying it out on them

i also hope you’ve had a good week 🌷💕

𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐘!

𝗮/𝗻: idk wth that is, but i think it's when ppl bite it off from their neck. sorry if i got it wrong. 💀

ꔫ 𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇𝐄, 𝐗𝐈𝐀𝐎, 𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈, 𝐊𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐇𝐀, 𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐙𝐎𝐔, 𝐊𝐀𝐄𝐘𝐀, 𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐎 ꔫ

𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇𝐄 chokes on air when he sees you bite each piece of candy-coated sweet off of the string. he was red-faced, his eyes wide and his jaw dropped in shock as he watched you lick the saccharine seductively. he snaps your hands away from the elastic string as he babbles about how you had just embarrassed yourself, but secretly enjoying it himself. his cheeks still flushed, he quickly lets go of your hands and turns away with a soft chuckle, averting his gaze as if to hide his true feelings. his red face slowly fades, but you can tell he is still highly amused; a small, satisfied smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "stop embarrassing me, idiot." he's abashed by your sudden actions just for attention.

𝐗𝐈𝐀𝐎 stares at you, unimpressed. he had been suspicious ever since you had started wearing that necklace randomly. he had noticed the candy necklace you had started wearing and was curious as to why you were wearing it. he had assumed it was a sign of affection towards him, but it was only when you had snapped the elastic string towards him that he realized it was just a game. his expression changed to one of disappointment as he realized the true meaning behind the necklace. He had thought it was a sign of affection, but now he knew it was only a game. "what are you doing?" he says with a placid expression present on his face. he wasn't amused.

𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈 smirks teasingly. he finds it quite amusing that you are doing this out of the blue. he watches you, enthused by how you nibble each cube of sugar out of the thread. he finds this behavior endearing and cute, and he can't help but let out a small chuckle. "you think you're clever, don't you?" eagerly awaiting to see what you would do next. he feels a bit challenged by your actions, and is curious to see if you can keep up with him. he enjoys the game of trying to one-up each other, and is eager to see what your next move will be.

𝐊𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐇𝐀 smiles without properly understanding what you were doing. he found how your bit of the bricks of dextrose so ravishing. but he didn't really understand why you were doing it, especially why you were doing this when the both of you were wandering around inazuma. you explained that it was a candy necklace you were made out of the syrupy bricks, which brought another smile to his face. he thought it was a sweet gesture, even if he didn't fully understand why you were doing it. "my sakura, did you do all of this for me to kiss you? well, i would have kissed you even if you didn't ask." he's amused and finds the whole situation misled.

𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐙𝐎𝐔 teases you about it. this shameless man knows what game your playing with him, he makes you fall into your own trap. he just tugs the necklace with his lips and bites a cube off while watching your flushed face, and he's over here grinning like a madman. he enjoys the thrill of making you feel embarrassed and out of control, and he revels in the pleasure of being the one in control. "two can play that game, darling." he was arrant about anyone seeing. heizou's gaze smolders with amusement, as he grabs you firmly by the waist and pulls you close. "let's see who has the upper hand now," he whispers into your ear, as his lips brush against your skin.

𝐊𝐀𝐄𝐘𝐀 walks closer to you and pesters you about it. he's throughly rhapsodized by your bold deeds. he never knew you had it in you to do this in dawn winery, in front of his brother, and many more people. "if you want a game of cat and mouse, darling," he purred, "i'm your man." his smile was knowing and devilish as he watched you squirm, enjoying the feeling of making you feel exposed and vulnerable. he was impressed by your audacity and confidence to do something daring and courageous in front of a crowd. yeah, the both of you got kicked out of the winery after that.

𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐎 is oblivious as hell. he doesn't get it, really. he has to ask the whole gang, which were even more oblivious that him, and it came to the point where they had to get on their knees for kuki to tell them what it meant. he finds you very funny, and is surprised by the envelope of your nerve for doing that bold act. "woah bunny, i didn't know these things existed. mind giving me a piece?" he would ask kindly before heaving the whole necklace for himself.

#genshin #genshin x reader #scaramouche x reader #wanderer x reader #xiao x reader #venti x reader #heizou x reader #kaeya x reader #itto x reader #genshin imagines

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