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zepskies · 2 months

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Take Me Home - Part 7

Pairing: Beau Arlen x F. Reader

Summary: You are another lost soul at Sunny Day Excursions. You’re aiming to settle in Helena, Montana, where Beau Arlen is the new sheriff in town. But you’ve both got a past you’re running from.

AN: For everyone who has Easter plans tomorrow (Happy Easter!), I decided to release this part a bit early. And yes, we’re at that part of the season 3 plotline…

Word Count: 6.6K

Tags/Warnings: Major angst, survival situations, violence, hurt/comfort.

❤️ Series Masterlist

Part 7: On the Edge of a Knife

Beau returned home that night with a large pizza for Carla and Emily. He’d already eaten with you an hour ago, but true to his legendary appetite, he still found room for a slice of pepperoni. They got comfortable around the fire out in front of his trailer.

“What held you up?” Carla asked.

Beau sighed and first wiped a bit of sauce from his face with a napkin. He admitted there was an altercation between you and your ex-boyfriend, Michael Hadley. Beau happened to be there in time to settle things down and help patch you up after you fell through a glass coffee table.

“Oh my God. Is she okay?” Emily asked. Beau noted her concern with a smile.

“She’s fine. Some minor cuts and bruises,” he said. “But I had to encourage the guy to leave town. If he’s got any sense, he’ll get gone.”

Emily looked relieved at that. Then she eyed him with a suspicious smile.

“And you just happened to be in the neighborhood?” she asked slyly, voicing the thought that Carla hadn’t wanted to.

Both women watched him closely, but Carla knew the tell-tale signs of Beau covering his embarrassment, giving his daughter a wry look.

“All right, smart Alec. Why don’t you break out the extra sheets I got in the trailer? We’ll set up the bed and the couch.”

“If you can call that glorified bench a couch,” Emily muttered with a grin.

“Ey!” Beau called after her, though he watched her go in amusement.

After a couple more hours of chatting and catching up, showers taken and plates washed, Emily headed for bed. The adults stayed up for a while, bundled in warm coats as they sat together by the fire.

Beau remembered what Emily told him days ago; that he hadn’t needed to be a perfect man for his wife and daughter. They’d just needed him to be a bit more honest about what he was going through, to let them in. After what happened today with you, your patience and understanding with him…he was beginning to get what she meant.

“I’m really thankful for you helping us,” Carla said. It unearthed him out of his own head.

“Yeah,” he replied with a nod.

Admittedly, he was still a bit distracted. Besides how he left things with you (which still made heat crawl up the back of his neck), he still had Avery and that stolen money to worry about. Otherwise known as the reason Carla and Emily would have to cram themselves in his little trailer.

“Hey, what’s going on?” Carla prodded, laying a gentle hand on his arm.

“I just got a bad feeling about all this,” he confessed. “It’s like in Houston with Randy.”

“No,” she shook her head. “You can’t go there.”

“It’s too late,” he replied. “‘Cause it feels the same. Like something’s…something is comin’, and I’m powerless to stop it.”

“Randy’s death was not your fault,” she reminded him. Just like you had.

Beau looked over at her with a humorless quirk of his lips.

“We both know that’s not true. He was my partner and I let him down. And then…then I wasn’t there for you, or Emily. I don’t blame you for leaving me.”

Carla couldn’t help it, but a part deep inside her had been regretting that choice. Her eyes burned with unshed tears. She managed to blink and keep them at bay, though she let out a shaky breath.

“Well, you’re here for us now,” she said. And yet, she could’ve predicted his next words like clockwork.

“It don’t make up for the way I checked out,” he said.

Carla licked her dry lips and swallowed down the emotion clogging her throat. She didn’t cry often. She could have an ironclad grip on her emotions when she needed to.

It was part of what made her a good lawyer. She knew Beau had sometimes gotten frustrated with that aspect of her personality in the past, because he was the opposite.

The man kept a good lid on things for his job, but at heart, he was driven by his passion, his anger, his love, and right now, his bone-deep guilt and shame.

She knew he’d been drowning in it for a year and hadn’t known how to pull him out. Every time he pushed her away, it had hurt her, hardened her, making her will to try again less and less. So she left him.

It was the choice she made, and she knew she had to live with it. Just like marrying Avery.

Carla laid a hand on Beau’s over his knee. She made sure he looked her in the eyes when she said this.

“I forgive you. For all of that, okay?” she said. After a moment, he nodded. This time, she felt like he actually heard her.

“But I’m telling you, this thing with Avery…this isn’t over by a long shot,” he told her. “I’m not saying that to scare you. You understand that?”

“Yeah,” she nodded, even though those tears from earlier were working their way down her face. She wiped them away hastily.

“I’m not gonna let anything happen to you two,” Beau said, in a firm, reassuring tone.

It worked, and it didn’t. Carla nodded again. “I know.”

He sighed through his nose and squeezed her hand. His gaze shifted away, back to the bonfire dancing in front of them. His eyes stung at both the smoke, and the emotion rising in his chest. He steeled himself.

“Carla, I’ll always love you…”

She smiled slightly, brushing the remaining tears from her cheek.

“Though I sense a but coming,” she said.

When she said your name in question, Beau glanced back over at her and nodded. Carla had been his first real love, besides Daisy Harlow in the eleventh grade.

But you were unexpected. How quickly, how deeply you’d gotten under his skin was too hard to ignore. And at this point, he didn’t want to.

Meanwhile, Carla stared at her ex-husband in bemusement. She slipped her hand from his and folded hers back in her lap.

“What’s she like?” she asked. Half of her was genuinely curious. The other half would rather not hear his answer, but she supposed it was only fair. She was the one who moved on first.

Still, the flicker of Beau’s soft smile stung, just a little.

“She’s special,” he said. “Resilient, like you. And smart to boot. You know she’s a college professor?”

“Yeah, Emily told me,” Carla said.

Beau’s smile dimmed when he noted the resignation in her voice. She gave him a knowing look.

“I have no right to complain,” she said. “And you deserve to be happy too, Beau.”

He considered that with a nod. He wasn’t sure if he believed her, but for your sake…he would try.

“Can you promise me something?” Carla asked.

“Name it,” he said.

“I know Avery is in this thing deep. He lied to me and he created this mess. Even when this is over, I don’t know what’s going to happen between us. I know I’m asking a lot of you, but please, look out for him,” she implored. Beau uttered a wry chuckle and rubbed at his chin.

“He is in this deep. And he’s being stubborn about it,” he said. “I might not be able to help him walk it back, but I will try.”

Carla released another sigh and nodded in response. She supposed that was the best she could hope for.

A few days later, you walked up and down the grocery store aisles with a basket in one hand and your phone against your ear with the other.

“Okay, I’ve got all manners of junk food and chick-flick movie watching snacks, including Reese’s cups, ice cream, frozen pizzas, and no less than three bottles of wine,” you said. “Am I missing anything?”

“I don’t think so, hun. That sounds very comprehensive,” Denise replied.

She was at work, and you were still getting ready for the fall semester. It was only a little over a month away, which meant you were excited, and also nervous.

You had five classes on your roster. You’d also visited Carroll College yesterday to set up your office with all your books, both textbooks and your favorites in fiction and non-fiction (but mostly fiction). Much Ado About Nothing was front and center in the Shakespeare section of your shelf.

You also wanted to at least try and relax for the rest of your summer. Denise was all too willing to help. You’d always had a good relationship with your aunt, albeit distant, since you’d lived in different states.

Living so close now just made you realize how much you two had in common. It was nice to find a friend in her, not just someone who would try to mother you in your own mother’s absence.

“Yes! Good. Then get ready to brainstorm what movies we’re gonna watch tonight, and in what order,” you said.

“Oh, don’t pretend like you don’t already have a color-coded checklist,” Denise quipped.

You laughed. Yes, she knew you too well. “Okay, maybe I do, but you still get a vote.”

You turned a corner in the aisles and nearly ran right into Carla, who was pushing a cart. You both jolted in surprise and recognition.

“Oh, hi! I’m sorry,” you said, at the same time she said, “Sorry, I…”

You two did the polite, nervous laughter people did when put in awkward situations. You noticed all the food she had in her cart—enough to feed a family of three for the week.

“Yeah, finally getting around to doing a grocery run,” she said. “Beau’s trailer leaves much to be desired in the form of amenities, so…”

You adopted a more amused smile. “Yeah, he’s not much of a cook, is he?”

“Do frozen fish sticks count?” Carla remarked.

“Only if there’s expired tartar sauce, according to Emily,” you joked. The two of you shared a laugh that was a little more genuine. You chatted for a couple minutes more before you parted with amiable handwaving. Then you realized that your aunt was still hanging on the line.

You sighed and put your phone back up to your ear. “Hey, sorry.”

“Was that who I think it was?” Denise asked. She was probably trying to be cryptic, if Emily was in the room with her.

“Indeed, it was. Doing a nice family-sized grocery run,” you whispered back, to make sure you weren’t overheard. You brought your basket of junk to one of the checkout lines.

“When was the last time you heard from him?” Denise asked. She must’ve heard the heaviness in your voice. You both knew exactly who “him” was code for. Beau friggin’ Arlen.

“Not since we said goodbye last week,” you replied. And the memory of that kiss had been torturing you for days. It had also been the fuel of many…late nights with yourself.

Speaking of which, need some more AA batteries, you thought with a warm blush.

“Okay, forget candy. We should get cheesecake,” Denise proposed.

You smiled. “You know what, that’s a damn good idea. Definitely cheesecake.”

You hopped out of line to do just that. You knew it probably wouldn’t be as good as Chicago made, but you went over to the bakery side of the store and hunted for the most good-looking cheesecake you could find.

“Hey, if you want, stop by here later,” your aunt said. “Em is here. We’ll grab lunch, make it a real girls’ day.”

“Sure,” you agreed. You hadn’t seen Emily in a week or so either. “Where are you thinking? I’ve been wanting to try that Indian place down the street from your office.”

“Sounds good to me. Come over after you drop those groceries off at home.”

“Okay, will do. I’ll see you guys soon!” you said.

Beau knew that he was going to be working straight through lunch. What he, Jenny, and Cassie had discovered in the past 24 hours was deeply unsettling.

Not only was Walter Sunny Barnes’s son, but Paige was alive. She’d been found in the foyer of Sunny’s home, brandishing a knife, convinced the married couple were in it together on her kidnapping. Sunny claimed she’d had no idea her husband had taken the poor girl and kept her in a shack for days.

According to Paige’s testimony, Buck Barnes had tried to kill her. And since she was alive, it meant Walter had lied in confessing to her murder. It was also likely that he hadn’t killed Mary or Luke either.

That wasn’t even the worst of Beau’s headache.

He rubbed his face in frustration after getting off the phone with Carla. Thanks to this whole business of Avery’s stolen cryptocurrency, she was being followed.

Fuckin’ hell, Beau thought. The next time he saw Avery, it had better be with handcuffs, or he was going to start working on his punch list for real. Instead, Beau grabbed his cell and called his daughter.

“Hey, Dad,” she answered on the third ring.

“Hey, honey. You doin’ all right? You good?” he asked. Maybe he was coming on a little strong, but worry was a living thing inside his gut.

“Yeah, totally. Just doing some research…but guess who’s coming to have lunch with us later?” she asked.

Her tone was leading him somewhere, and Beau thought he knew the destination. His lips curved with a half-smile. When he guessed your name, Emily confirmed.

“You’re welcome to join us. If, you know, you wanted to,” she teased.

Beau’s smile twisted with disbelief. Was his daughter trying to set him up? And better yet, it seemed like she liked you well enough to do it. While the thought warmed him, his smile dimmed.

“Wish I could, but uh, I got a lot of work here to do. I’m just…checking up on ya, like dads do,” he said.

As much as he wanted to see you (and he really, really did), he wasn’t lying. He needed to follow up on the man who’d trailed Carla to the drycleaners this morning. And he already had Jenny and Poppernak looking into finding Buck Barnes. He’d fled the scene after Paige and Sunny were picked up at the Barnes residence.

“Well, okay, consider me checked. We can talk later if you want,” Emily said. She sounded a bit disappointed. Beau felt guilty for that, but he’d make it up to her tonight. Maybe he’d bring home some takeout so Carla didn’t have to cook again in his tiny kitchenette.

“All right, honey. If not, I’ll see you tonight,” he said. “Just…don’t go anywhere by yourself, okay? Make sure Denise or Cassie’s with you. Matter of fact, I’ll pick you up from there today.”

“Yeah sure,” she said. Though he didn’t think she really heard the warning in his voice.

“‘Kay. Bye, Dad.”

She hung up, leaving Beau still feeling off-balanced. Until news came in from a fellow officer: while Paige had been brought to the hospital, Sunny Barnes had been brought into the station for questioning about her husband.

“Sorry I’m so late. I started cleaning my apartment and lost track of time,” you said, walking into the office of Dewell & Hoyt. Denise and Emily waved at you from their respective desks.

“That’s okay. We’ve been busy here,” Denise said. You looked at the large pinboard on the wall filled with news clippings and pieces of evidence. Bleeding Heart Killer, read many of the subject lines.

“Ech. Still working on this?” you asked.

“Unfortunately,” said Denise. She grabbed up her purse and went over to kiss your cheek in greeting. “But we might’ve gotten a huge break on it. I’ll tell you all about it when I get back.”

“Get back? Where’re you going?” you asked.

“To get the food! I already placed the orders,” she said, patting your arm. “I’ll be right back.”

You gave her a narrowed look. “I was going to pay for it—”

“No need!” Denise sing-songed on her way out of the office. It had you smiling, shaking your head. You looked over at Emily and tossed a thumb over your shoulder.

“Careful with her. She can be devious,” you said.

Emily smiled and stood up from her desk. She went over to sit with you on the small couch near the center of the room.

“I’m actually glad you’re here,” she said. “I’ve kinda got a question for you.”

“Kinda?” you echoed with a smile, but you pat her on the knee. “What’s on your mind, honey?”

Emily looked a little unsure. It had you giving her your undivided attention.

“It’s about my dad,” she began. Your smile slowly fell, but now you were really listening.

“Okay,” you nodded.

Emily opened her mouth to reply, but before she could, the lights in the entire office went out.

Natural light still came in from the large windows at the front. It was odd though. The weather outside, while chilly, wasn’t cold enough to create an outage. You hadn’t heard anything fizzle when the lights went out either.

“That’s weird—” Emily said.

The back door burst open with the sound of hinges breaking. Both of you gasped and stood from the couch. You slipped a hand into your purse to find your phone, and then the first contact you could think of.

You were about to press the call button when a tall man with broad shoulders stepped through. He was older, balding, and his clothes and neck were stained with blood.

Buck Barnes.

“Buck?” you gasped. “What…what’re you doing here?”

He didn’t look like the easy going, kind-hearted man you knew at the camp. Now, he looked haggard, injured, and dangerous, like a wild animal.

“Hush up,” Buck held up a silver pistol in his right hand. “And drop that phone, nice and slow.”

Your heart was in your throat, but you couldn’t just think of yourself. You subtly tried to pull Emily behind you as you set your phone down on the ground.

“You tried to kill Paige,” Emily accused of the man. It had you turning to her, your eyes going wide. When you looked over at Buck to gauge his reaction, you saw how his lips pursed.

“Sit down and shut up,” Buck ordered, gesturing with his gun at both of you. He drew closer and forced you and Emily to sit beside each other on the couch. There he grabbed a roll of duct tape from his pocket and began taping your shaking hands together.

“Why’re you doing this?” you asked Buck.

“I need some collateral if I’m gonna get the hell outta dodge,” he replied.

“Fine, but let Emily go. She’s just a kid,” you begged, as tears stung at your eyes.

Buck just continued taping you up. Thankfully not your feet, just your wrists. He moved to Emily next.

“You don’t need her,” you tried again. “Come on, Buck. You really think Beau Arlen’s going to want to work something out with you if you take his daughter?”

“Oh, I’m bettin’ he’ll be more than willing.” Buck grabbed you and placed a strip of tape across your mouth, then on Emily’s. He hooked a large, calloused hand around your arm.

“Now get up.”

“What?!” Beau asked. His eyes widened in alarm. “Slow down, Denise. What’s going on?”

The more he listened, the more his heart plummeted into his stomach. He had to grip his work desk for balance.

It took him and Jenny under half an hour to meet up with Cassie and Denise back at Dewell & Hoyt, along with a forensics unit of officers. There was evidence of struggle in a turned over table and a broken back door lock.

Denise explained that she left you and Emily for just a few minutes while she went to grab a late lunch order. By the time she returned, the power was out, set off by the breakers, and you and Emily were missing.

Jenny found your purse on the couch, while Beau found your cell phone on the ground. He picked it up with a gloved hand. He’d seen you unlock your phone enough times to remember your passcode.

When he inputted those six numbers and unlocked the screen, he found his own name and phone number highlighted there. You’d been about to call him.

He squeezed your phone tight in his hand. He looked up and saw another officer pick up Emily’s backpack.

“No power means no surveillance footage,” Jenny said. “Okay, let’s think. Why take her and Emily?”

“It’s gotta do with Avery and the money he stole,” Beau said, grinding his teeth. “I needa find him.”

“Any idea where he might be held up?” Jenny asked.

“Carla will know,” he replied.

“Do you want me to go with you?” Jenny was quick to offer. She could see his rage bubbling.

“No,” he said, cutting her off with a swift hand. “Get a response team ready, but I don’t want anybody doing anything without checking with me!”

He was out the door before any of the women could stop him. Denise was in tears, both for you and for Emily. Cassie wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

“We’re gonna find them,” she promised.

You and Emily were in the backseat of an SUV. Buck was singing along to some country song, driving them down a highway to hell knows where.

The tears had begun to dry on your cheeks. It didn’t mean you were no longer petrified, but for Emily, to give her support, you’d been able to keep breathing through it. She was still in panic mode, hyperventilating as tears streamed down her face.

“Y’all better quiet down back there,” Buck warned.

You grabbed Emily’s hands and met her frantic eyes with your calmer ones. You were hoping to reassure her, let her know that while you were scared too, you were with her. She wasn’t alone.

She squeezed your hands back, even though it made you wince. Your right hand was still injured. Again, you breathed through it so you could hold her back. You rested the side of your head against hers to try and help steady her further. If you could, you would’ve held her like a mother bear.

Emily leaned against your side and began to calm down, bit by bit. Meanwhile, Buck continued to talk your ears off—about country music, and how this particular song was the one he and Sunny danced to at their wedding. Though frankly, you couldn’t give a shit about anything that was coming out of his mouth.

All you knew was that it was nighttime, pitch black darkness by the time he pulled into a plaza. It looked like a gas station next to a bar.

Only in Montana, you mused. Though you perked up at attention when Buck parked and actually left the car.

Of course, he took the keys with him and put the child locks on the doors, but you tugged at the duct tape Buck put around your ankles when he’d forced you and Emily into this car. If you could get free, then you could shove your way into the front seat and unlock the doors.

Emily tried to help you. You winced as the tape tugged at your skin. At least I shaved yesterday.

She gasped around her gag when she saw a young man coming their way in the parking lot. You joined her in banging on the window, trying to get his attention.

“Oh my God,” you heard him say, muffled as it was through the window. You pointed at the front of the car, trying to communicate to him to break the window open there.

“Hold on, I’ll get you guys out of there,” he said. He went to the front of the car and tried at the door handles, but before he could get very far in his attempt to free you, Buck came up behind the younger man and grabbed him in a chokehold.

You and Emily screamed at him, but it was no use. You did your best to shield Emily’s eyes when Buck snapped the man’s neck.

Bad call, bad leadership, bad police work.

Beau felt the weight of his shame like never before—all while he held Carla and rocked her in his arms. She’d just arrived at the police station, after getting the news that her husband had been killed.

When he learned that Emily was taken, Avery tried to help Beau and the police confront the men he’d stolen the $15 million from, but Avery had gone rogue by bringing a gun into the equation.

Beau had just one chance to pull Avery out and send in his unit of officers on standby. Jenny had asked him what he wanted to do, hoping he would make the right choice.

Beau had been selfish. He wanted to see if the men would give up the location on where they were holding you and Emily, so he kept Avery in play. He’d thought the man would be fine with Tonya and Donno backing him up in the room.

After all was said and done, however, Avery lay dead in a pool of his own blood with a bullet in his chest. The criminals also hadn’t taken you or Emily.

By process of elimination, Beau now knew it was Buck. The man had already killed a hiker on his way out of the woods, where he’d been holding Paige.

Now it was a whole new manhunt.

“Beau,” Jenny said. “We have something on Buck.”

It prompted him to drag himself out of the dark spiral of his thoughts. He let Carla go, but kept a supportive hand on her back. She was still distraught, and understandably so—not just for her husband, but for her missing daughter.

Jenny gave Carla a sympathetic look. She beckoned him over though.

“Come see this,” she said.

Beau comforted Carla one moment more, rubbing her back, but she encouraged him to go with Jenny. She led him into another room where Cassie was waiting for them, and Jenny’s laptop was connected to a smart TV.

On the screen was new surveillance footage of a parking lot, outside a bar a few hours out of town. There was a green pickup truck parked next to a black SUV. Beau couldn’t see you or Emily, but he watched Buck drag the dead body of a man behind the truck.

“Buck was casing the lot for a car to steal,” Jenny said. “We’re guessing this unlucky guy found them.”

“It means they’re still alive,” Cassie pointed out. Jenny drew attention to the keys, or whatever it was that Buck dropped and picked up off the floor. It was hard to make out from the footage.

Cassie agreed to ask Cormack Barnes if he knew what the keys were for, considering he already had the keys to the pickup trick in his hand when he picked up the fallen set. Beau knew it was time to question Sunny Barnes again.

He headed down the hall to do just that, with Jenny on his heels. Soon though, he found himself slowing down in the hall, like his feet were made of rubber. That, and his heart was fracturing. Jenny slowed down with him, giving him a questioning look.

“It’s just…it’s the one thing we’re supposed to do. Protect our kids,” he said. “The one thing.”

“Hey,” she said. Her blue eyes were understanding. “You couldn’t have done anything differently.”

And yet again, they both knew that was a lie. Beau held a curled fist against his lips for a moment, as he tried to swallow down the lump of emotion in his throat.

“She’s gotta be so scared, Jenny,” he said. His eyes stung, but he tried to blink the unshed tears from his eyes. It wasn’t working.

“Both of them,” he said. “They’ve gotta be terrified. And every minute we waste chasing our tails just gives that twisted son a bitch a chance to do something to them—”

Jenny grabbed his arm to steady him. “I still think he’s keeping them alive for leverage.”

“Well, I hope you’re right, because there’s nothing stopping him from making an example from one of them,” he said.

But the moment it escaped his lips, he wished he hadn’t uttered the thought out loud. It was too much.

He felt like a failure of a father. That was already destroying him from the inside out. And though he’d vowed to himself otherwise, you got dragged into this too.

You’d already been through the wringer enough. Beau hadn’t even checked in on you in damn near a week since he left your apartment the last time.

Now, you’d been taken by the very same man who murdered your friend Mary. Beau hadn’t had the chance to tell you…

He hadn’t been able to tell you a lot of things.

And maybe, he’d never get the chance.

The pickup truck Buck stole had a small trailer attached, convenient for stuffing you and Emily in, along with the corpse he’d made of the truck’s owner.

On the long and bumpy ride down the road, you’d been able to search the dead man’s jeans and found a small pocketknife. You pressed a small button to click the blade open. You showed it to Emily, and then tried to cut her bonds.

You only got halfway through when the truck and trailer stopped. Moments later, you smelled gas. Buck was probably stopping for a refill on the pickup truck. You closed the knife and hid it in your hands. That instinct turned out to be a good one, because Buck slid the trailer door open.

You and Emily winced as the bright morning sun hit your bleary eyes. Not only had you not slept all night, but you’d gotten used to the perpetual darkness of the trailer.

“You girls behaving yourselves back here?” Buck asked.

You and Emily stayed quiet, but fearful. He stepped into the trailer to lower your taped gag, and then the girl’s. He uncapped a water bottle to give her some. It was a strangely humane thing to do, you thought.

But then you realized that he just didn’t want you two to pass out of dehydration. He was trying to keep you alive long enough to use you as bargaining chips.

“My dad’s going to find you,” Emily said, staring up at your captor. Buck chuckled at her cheek.

“You want water or not?” he asked.

“And when he does, he’s gonna kill you,” she said. Buck rolled his eyes and gave her a few sips of water. He offered the bottle to you next.

Instead of drinking, you used his distraction and proximity to pop open the pocketknife and jab it at his face. He pulled back fast, but you managed to sink the three-inch little blade into his neck. Buck backhanded you so hard, it made the side of your face crack against the back of the trailer.

Emily screamed and tried to catch you when you accidentally fell on her shoulder. When you recovered after a bit, blinking the black splotches out of your vision, Buck punched at the spot right above your heads and made you both flinch. By then, he’d taken the little knife out of his neck, even though it made a new wound ooze blood down his shirt.

“Forgot to check his pockets,” he gritted out. His anger then bled away, into a dark chuckle. “Gettin’ a little rusty.”

He poured out the rest of the water over your boots, but he didn’t make any further threats. At least, not physically. He stepped away and began to exit the trailer.

“Next time it’ll be gasoline and a lighter,” he warned. “Now both of you, shut the fuck up.”

Then he closed the door, casting you and Emily into darkness once again.

“You okay?” Emily whispered. You could barely make out her face in the dim light, coming from the smallest crack in the trailer door. You rolled your head her way so you could give her a smile.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you replied. Truthfully, your head was ringing and aching at the same time. Buck had knocked you out for a few seconds there. Plus, you were exhausted, and hungry, and parched.

“At least the gags are off,” she said. You nodded, letting out a sigh. You welcomed her to rest on your shoulder and tucked her wrapped hands under yours.

“We’ve just gotta keep holding out,” you said. “I’m sure your dad is on the way.”

Emily nodded in agreement. She believed every word of what she’d told Buck. She just hoped it was sooner rather than later.

It was much, much later.

Still, you and Emily were no better off. Actually, you were pretty sure this was worse.

Buck had driven you deep into the woods, then forced you to walk what felt like another half-mile until you reached a dusty old shack. He’d unlocked it and forced you both inside, kneeling in the dirt and dead leaves. Along with the duct tape already around your wrists, he’d tied you both up with ropes around the metal hooks hanging from the short roof.

Even with the gags off, it was hard to breathe in the hot, stuffy woodshed. It felt similar to being buried in a box and left to rot.

You weren’t sure how many hours it had been, but the sun was slowly inching by. If you had to guess, it was around mid-afternoon. You were sweating down your neck and back, now uncomfortable while kneeling in the jeans you were wearing. And sometimes, your vision started to blur in and out.

By now you were beyond hunger. Dying of thirst? Quite possibly.

“How’re you doing?” you asked Emily. She nodded, but she didn’t have much energy to talk either.

So instead, you tried to twist your wrists out of the rope. Very quickly you gave yourself burns, however. Buck had tied your bonds so very tight, not to mention the duct tape underneath.

What a fucking asshole, you thought. He could’ve at least left a bottle of water. Or some protein bars.

“How are they supposed to find us out here?” Emily asked. Her voice was small and coarse with exhaustion. You nudged her knee in comfort.

“The police will get it out of Buck, I’m sure,” you said. “Even if Beau can’t, damn certain Jenny will.”

You gave her a smile. Emily tried to smile back, but she didn’t quite make it there.

“God, I’m so thirsty,” she coughed.

“I know, I’m sorry,” you nodded, letting out a shaky breath. “All we can do is keep trying to get loose.”

You both tried twisting out of the ropes for a while, but it was no use. You were just going to bruise or cut your wrists further through the tape.

You knew that you and Emily had been in the woods for hours at this point, somewhere in the middle of the mountains. You tried not think about how unlikely it would be that someone actually heard you, let alone found you.

You knew you were the adult in this situation. You had to keep it together for the girl beside you, but after a while, a feeling of desperation and despair rose up again in your chest, no matter how hard you fought it all.

Tears welled up in your eyes, though you tried to breathe through it. Emily nudged your arm this time, giving you a comforting look.

“It’s gonna be okay,” she whispered. “I know Dad’s coming for us.”

Your lip wobbled, but you nodded and sucked in a breath. If she could be strong, then you could too…

And that was when you started to hear voices. You knew they weren’t just in your head, because Emily perked up too. You both called out the best you could to whoever was out there.

You squinted watery eyes when the door to the shed finally slid open.

Beau tested the limitations of Jenny’s SUV on his way out from the woods, and then back into them.

At the very least, Buck was dead.

Sunny had shot him—before they had gotten a location on you and Emily. Beau had been about to have a serious breakdown before Cassie called him.

“They found them,” he’d told Jenny, with red and shining eyes.

In another five miles, they reached the old cabin. Cassie had said there was a woodshed attached on the south side. Beau tore out of the car and sprinted up a hill, through a patch of dense trees, until he found the cabin and the shed.

Cassie and Cormack were talking to someone just out of Beau’s eyeline, but his gaze focused on his daughter. The moment Emily saw him, she brightened and ran to him. He met her in the middle, grabbing her tight and secure in his arms.

His tears burned in his eyes and fell as he held her, comforted her, rubbing her back. She held onto him just as tightly.

He struggled and failed to keep himself together. Relief wasn’t even the word for how he felt; it was beyond words.

And it was almost unreal to be able to hold his daughter and see that she didn’t look hurt, just shaken.

“I’ve gotcha, sweetheart,” he said. “God, I’ve got you.”

Letting out the deepest breath, Beau’s gaze ventured past his daughter and up ahead. There he found you, being supported by Cassie up the hill. Beau’s eyes widened.

You were rubbing your wrists. They looked raw. Your eyes were also red and watery when they met his. Your breath seemed to catch as well.

Your name fell from Beau’s lips, his voice breaking. Emily looked up at her dad and had to smile. She even made room for you when you came up on his other side. Beau still kept his daughter tucked against him, but he reached for you as well and brought you into his embrace.

He felt your body shaking with quiet, wracking sobs. His heart broke for it, but he soothed a hand over your knotted hair and down your back.

“Shh, it’s okay now,” he whispered in your ear. His voice was choked with emotion. “I’ve got you, darlin’."

Never gonna let you go again, he thought.

You nodded, sniffling, but you kept your face buried against his chest.

Eventually, you lifted your head to meet his kind, if tearful eyes. He was a mess, and so were you. He was right though; you knew that it was all right now, as long as he was here.

You looked over at Emily, who was still hanging onto her father. You touched her shoulder.

“You okay?” you asked through tears. She nodded back at you with a smile.

“Good,” Beau said. “Let’s get you two home.”

You realized then that you were clinging to him like…like he was yours.

“Oh,” you uttered, releasing his shirt. “I‘m sorry.”

Beau’s eyes widened at the way you pulled away from him, unconsciously lowering your gaze. He frowned, and he pressed a gentle hand to your cheek, so you’d look at him again.

“Don’t you do that,” he said, his voice still a bit unsteady.

Almost every cell in his body said to pull you back in. To sink his fingers in your hair, and to kiss you.

But he noticed Jenny, Cassie, Cormack, and even his daughter watching with some kind of smile on their faces. You stared up at him, teary eyed and waiting.

Beau cleared his throat.

He hesitated a bit too long, warring with himself all the while. So he just stroked your cheek and guided you, along with his daughter to the car.

You and Emily were going home.

AN: 🫣 Lol please don't hate me for the little tease at the end there. But how did you like how all the action and drama of the kidnapping unfolded?

Don't think this is the finale though. We've still got some drama and fun things to come. (Also, I think it's funny how this next particular chapter is going to post on my birthday lol.)

Next Time:

“I’m the one who needs you to forgive me,” he said, gently squeezing your arm. “I promised myself I would keep you safe, that I wouldn’t drag you into this mess. And I couldn’t keep my end of the deal.”

“Stop that,” you said. You grabbed the front of his shirt. “How many times do I have to say it’s not your fault before you get it in your stubborn head?”

It came out a bit snappish, but the moment your eyes met his, you both seemed to realize where your passions had led you. Just inches away from one another.

“Maybe one more time,” Beau said, in a quieter, but no less heady voice. There was a hint of humor in his eyes. You couldn’t help but smile back.

You released his shirt and instead, took his face in your hands.

▶️ Keep Reading: PART 8

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felassan · 6 months

Text

Thoughts on the new Dragon Age: Dreadwolf teaser THEDAS CALLS, and other new things about the game from DA Day 2023

[post under cut due to length]

(ﾉ `･∀･)ﾉﾞ New stuff! Let's goo!

Other than chatting about the new stuff with some friends, I have avoided reading other posts (and other peoples' speculations/theories from other websites/platforms) about it. I like to try and get it all out my head onto 'paper' before doing so (it's fun seeing the few things I get right and the more things I get wildly wrong in theorycrafting hhh). after this post I'm super excited to dive into other speculations, compare and contrast and also read the thoughts of others on things I will have totally missed!

this post will mention some things I already mentioned in previous posts.

First, I think it's interesting that the "Welcome to Dragon Age" text blurb on the website has been slightly updated. the old version reads:

“Enter Thedas, a vibrant world of rugged wilderness, treacherous labyrinths, and glittering cities. The Dragon Age is a time of warring nations, savage combat, and secret magics. Now, the fate of this world teeters on a knife’s edge. Thedas needs a new hero; one they’ll never see coming. Forge a courageous fellowship to challenge the gathering storm. Friendship, drama, and romance abound as you bring striking individuals together into an extraordinary team. Become the hero and light the beacon of hope in their darkest moments.” [can be seen here]

The new version reads:

"Enter the world of Thedas, a vibrant land of rugged wilderness, treacherous labyrinths, and glittering cities – steeped in savage combat and secret magics. Now, the fate of this world teeters on a knife's edge. Thedas needs a new leader; one they'll never see coming. You’ll forge a courageous fellowship to challenge the gathering storm. Friendship, drama, and romance will abound as you bring striking individuals together into an extraordinary team. Become the leader and light the beacon of hope in their darkest moments." [source]

I like "the world of Thedas" better as it makes for a nice call back to the World of Thedas lore books. The reference to "warring nations" has been removed which I find curious, and what remains is savage combat and secret magics only. I wonder if it was decided that some 'warring nations' storyline elements would take more of a back seat? e.g. the Tevinter/Qunari Antaam war or Qunari Antaam invasion of Tevinter and other northern nations. - in favor of focusing on the array of other stuff, factions, threats and plot-threads that's going on, like Solas' plans/the Veil, the threat of the Evil Gods, whatever's going down among the Wardens, all the new factions (Lords of Fortune, Shadow Dragons, Veil Jumpers), red lyrium etc? there's certainly lots the plot could involve and explore without a nations at war plotline/backdrop. The Qunari Antaam invasion has been covered a lot now anyways in short stories, Tevinter Nights, and the recent comics, and I'm reminded of how the mage-templar war in the run-up to DA:I seemed like it would be a bigger part of the game's plot than what it turned out to be.

Also interestingly, a new "hero" has been changed to new "leader". Become the "leader", not become the "hero". I feel like these words have kinda different connotations. what are the connotations of "leader" as opposed to "hero"?

I also like the Thedas Calls tagline. this teaser reminded me of parts of the DA:I "A Wonderful World" trailer, in that both are showcasing the varied regions we'll visit and locales that will feature in the game. and yk, I am super enjoying BG3, it's an amazing game that is really fun and beautiful and I've put loads of hours into it, but I miss the world&worldbuilding of DA. Thedas is calling to me indeed ( ´•̥̥̥ω•̥̥̥` )

Now, the fate of this world teeters on a knife's edge. // "a spike of lyrium sprang from the base of the idol, so that all at once, it was not merely an idol, but a ritual blade."

I also wanna take a moment to compile in one place the various lines posted by the BW and DA Twitter accounts:

"Thedas is on the cusp of revelation and on the brink of damnation."

"This is Thedas. 💜 Enjoy it while it lasts." ("What does that mean?!")

"The Dread Wolf readies to make his move."

It's well-established by now that Solas has been Planning things and that there are imminent threats (not just Solas) to Thedas. it's also pretty commonly thought that the Veil will indeed be brought down in or prior to the next game - that would change the nature of Thedas as we know it, and the nature of reality. one version of Thedas would end as a new world begins (or the old world returns?). these snippets also sound like general fantasy/marketing/high-stakes SAVE THE WORLD! / THE WORLD IS UNDER THREAT OMG taglines. lines from the DA:I marketing era ("Will you stand against [the darkness/fires above]? Or lead this world to its bitter end?", "Lead Them Or Fall") weren't super accurate to the contents of that game. so I'm not sure how much we can read into them. but they sound cool and serve a purpose. (even the Gear Store account is in part in on it btw, "unveiling" the new merch in the store hh).

I also like the suggestion that a sort of bronzey color accompanies the purple color themeing now. it's neat.

To the trailer. The teaser is "a mix of gameplay and cinematics". It "represents [a] game in development". it's in-engine. we're told that there will be a full reveal of DA:D in the summer of 2024. what might a full reveal entail? sounds like a kind of detailed showcase right? showing new companions, showing gameplay, story trailers and story information, in-depth looks at specific systems in or aspects of the game like skill trees or CC or something etc. when might that be exactly - perhaps Summer Game Fest, or during an EA Play type event? they could also just do their own showcase.

also overall I liked the teaser, I thought it was neat, it looked and sounded cool.

the new blurbs from the latest blog are relevant to the trailer, so let's put them here too.

Ever the pinnacle of mystery and intrigue, the Crows watch from the deep shadows of beautiful Antiva. Something, however, is amiss, and they are set on uncovering the source.

Upon eastern shores and sunkissed sands, the Lords of Fortune no longer hold dominion over the coasts of Rivain—not when dragons are growing bolder and laying waste to their ships.

To the far west, three Grey Wardens patrol the Anderfels. Tremors have been creating disturbances of late. Their cause is unknown. Upon the distant horizon, a storm of ominous intent brews and darkens the skies.

We see a shot of Antiva and the port-city of Treviso. this city is in northern Antiva, on the coast of the Rialto Bay. The Antivan Crows originate from the lands surrounding Treviso, and it’s an important city for the guild still, as well as the seat of House Valisti. Fittingly in this shot in the trailer we see a corvid in the foreground, and more flying from Treviso in other parts of the map.

Treviso has been captured, occupied, burned and liberated several times during the Qunari Wars and the New Exalted Marches, and in recent times irl and in the post-DA:I Thedas timeline, in the short story As We Fly it has been occupied and invaded by Qunari Antaam. ("The Antaam will rule Antiva. And Treviso will learn to kneel." / "Out of time, like your city. And soon, the world" / "Treviso will be free.")

He smiled and signaled for his men to halt, making a show of raising his war hammer to his shoulder, emphasizing its weight. "Out of breath?" he called.

I'd also like to note that while the blurbs reference tremors in the Anderfels, the trailer map shows fault lines/cracks in other parts of Thedas, as here in Antiva.

Next we see a shot of the Treviso skyline at night. corvids fill the night sky and it sounds like we can hear them cawing. on a tower or rooftop is a statue of a crow (in fact there's more than one of these), and the rooftops with the roof tiles and those distinctive domes look like they would be super fun to do some Assassin's Creeding on. it's cool to see this locale from previous teasers and previous concept art pieces come to life again. Does anyone see any hint of the Qunari Antaam occupation of Treviso being ongoing in this shot? I could be missing something.

"We fight for everyone, and we always will. The Crows rule Antiva." Who could the speaker be? Andarateia Cantori, Caterina Dellamorte, Noa de Acutis, a member of House Valisti, Crow Lady who is from concept art, the "another Crow" or "friend" who picked up the contract in As We Fly, someone new? What she's saying is also of note. the Crows are a guild of assassins who basically run Antiva, not freedom fighters per se. but as we can see in As We Fly, as the Crows have been combatting the Qunari Antaam occupation of the city, the Treviso populace have begun in part to see them as something akin to freedom fighters who are "fighting for us!" Noa and Neri, a pair of old Antivan Crows, discussed how the Crows are trying to free Antiva, and the Crow message being intentionally shaped in response to the message of the Qunari Antaam occupation:

"Pity,” said Noa, smiling across her drink. “I'd enjoy killing a few pretenders.” Neri smiled back. "Noted. But until then, we craft our message to answer theirs." He raised his cup. "The Crows rule Antiva." Noa answered with her own. "And Treviso will be free."

The Antivan Crow speaking in the trailer is echoing this message. it could also be a sincerely-held belief or principle for her of course. Teia for example seems to lean this way, and in Tevinter Nights it's detailed that before Houses and masks, the Crows were monks near Treviso. using some herbs they poisoned a local duke who was terrorizing a village; they did what needed to be done to protect the Antivan people. over the years, they've apparently lost sight of that. (with a Crow in TN saying that now it's all about family and blood instead of a claw working as one, and disparaging them for being all about money when, in the beginning, they were protectors who fought for Antiva and for the people. he felt that they had chosen profit over patriotism somewhere along the way). so for some Crows it's an actual sentiment and not just a crafted message. Tevinter Nights also mentions how the Crows are mostly heroes in Antiva (protecting it as it lacks an army), with Antivans tending to romanticize them as freedom fighters.

As for the blurb, I wonder what is amiss in Antiva? the Crows are apparently set on on uncovering the source of things being amiss in Antiva. Does this pertain to the Qunari Antaam invasion? Or is it to do with what Teia and Viago were investigating in one issue of Dragon Age: The Missing (which was of course a prequel comic)? they were in Vyrantium on a contract to kill Lady Crysanthus, because there were rumors of her unsavory connections and questions that needed to be answered. They believed that she was working with the Venatori, helping them to operate freely in Vyrantium while they laid their plans to plan a move against the Imperium. At the end of the comic, they say that they will report to the Crows what they learned with Varric and Harding, as "the Crows must be made aware that the Venatori are seeking to make a concerted move against the Imperium". that's Vyrantium and Tevinter ofc, but it could be part of some greater tangled thing. I'm also reminded of how in the Lucanis story, we learned that someone mysterious had contracted the Crows to kill a bunch of prominent Venatori. the Venatori were like "bro we will not cower to foreign mercs like the Crows". So perhaps they are cooking up something bad in Antiva because of this stuff between them?

in any event, per Tevinter Nights, with half her Talons dead, Antiva is more vulnerable than ever, and so something being amiss there does not sound good!!

The accompanying art piece from the blogpost (all three of these are beautiful ^^) shows three Crows on the Trevisan rooftops, looking out over the canals at night, one a bearded human man, one an elf, and one person who is facing away from the viewer's perspective.

-------------------------

Next we move to Rivain. See here for prior posts on: the Evil Gods and cephalopods

I wonder if the placement of the squid monster ON/AS Rivain is just fun art/general foreboding 'oh no, the bad gods are coming',-themeing, or does it mean that an evil god is specifically rising in or under Rivain and that Rivain is in more danger? it's super clever art having the monster god be Rivain on the map anyways hh and it looks cool. I also think that it doesn't just look like a cephalopod - minus the tentacles, it looks like the head and snout of a dragon. I know the monster is following the shape of Rivaini landmass and so that's why, but it struck me nonetheless. (also I like the parallel imagery of a draconic squidthing vs draconic wolf in Fen'Harel's dragon-wolf form..)

it's a nice and ominous/threatening touch that the creature's eye turns to the viewer and the pupil dilates on catching sight of us. the creature's tentacles writhe and pour out of Rivain into the rest of northern Thedas. and when the trailer later shows a map of Tevinter coast, much of the center is entangled in tentacle-like or snake-like tendrils.

btw are these lines implied shipping lanes, cool lines because cool art looks cool, or something else? I ask because they reminded me of the repeating circles motif and the geometric type patterns in the vinyl art.

"Glory to the risen gods. They've come to deliver this world." - Risen Gods plural, there isn't just one of these bad ominous risen gods. and the Dread Wolf (though, despite the Fen'Harel cultist/followers in TN I don't think that he's one of those being referred to in that line) clearly isn't the only thing that has been "rising" in Thedas, there are multiple other ancient godlike entities other than Solas afoot. The tentacles and squid remind me of the Cekorax (see Evil Gods and cephalopod posts linked above), which is neither demon nor spirit and came from somewhere past the Veil. this creature could be of a similar ilk, like maybe the Cekorax was a mere mook type mob (that's the vibe it gave. a herald of what is to come but not anywhere near like being a big bad itself) compared to this trailer squid which is more like a king of its kind or something. the Cekorax also said that "things are rising" in the story it appeared in. I also note that like the Cekorax, the true nature of the Old Gods is yet unknown - are they demons, spirits, Great dragons, something else?

Cephalopods also commonly in fantasy-type media have dangerous, demonic, cthonic, Lovecraftian, interdimensional type vibes and symbolism going on, e.g. the Illithids in BGworld. In a Dragon Age context, this makes me think of the Void/the abyss, eluvian travel, implied 'spaces between' and how the Crossroads is like a sort of pocket dimension. cephalopods are ofc also sea creatures, and so this also reminds me of the imagery where the Fade (another realm) is described as being watery or being like a sea in nature (the well of all souls, emerald waters of the Fade, the sea of dreams etc). You can see why these creatures are portrayed as or were designed to be tentacley and cephalopody. this is becoming a ramble I know but it's all connected somehow aaa.

On the speaker during this segment: perhaps they are a Tevinter or Venatori Old God cultist, that's the sort of vibe I get from them. worship of the Old Gods still persists in secret parts of Tevinter society to this day, with cults to them existing. in recent times in Thedas, we've seen numerous examples of these:

"the Blood Band is an Old God cult led by Fallstick. They hate templars and don’t view blood magic as being inherently evil. the Last Moon are/were a cult dedicated to Lusacan. Early in the Dragon Age, they abducted and ritualistically murdered several people. Their goal at that time was to cause the start of a terrible battle, in order to cover Thedas in “a night that will never end” (Lusacan being the Dragon of Night). Magister Aurelian Titus also led a cult. Titus wanted to return all of the Imperium to the worship of the Old Gods. He tried to use the Dreamer abilities of himself and his cult, bolstered by the Magrallen artifact, in order to brainwash Thedosians. He had a vision of a restored Tevinter where slaves knew their place and the Chant of Light and the Qun were both purged from peoples’ minds. He said “The old gods. The dragon gods. We shall become them”. there’s also a tale of a group of Old God cultists who departed mainland Thedas on a trio of ships in the late Storm Age to try and reach the mysterious uninhabited land of Amaranth, across the eastern ocean. Their expedition was supposedly never heard from again" [source]

I note with scared hamster fear btw that the Amaranthine Ocean is in the east, the land beyond it is called Amaranth, Thedosian people go there or try to go there and never come back, and the land there is said to be devoid of any sentient species and yet when former settlements are found they were empty and the only survivor had been driven mad and killed themself. meanwhile, the Executors purport that they act on behalf of powers across the sea, they are cloaked from head to toe and smell of salt/brine like the sea, and they have a history of being active in the east of Thedas and Thedosian countries with eastern coasts. It was said that "those across the seas will come soon enough". I have also speculated before since literally the time of Tevinter Nights's release a link between Ghilan'nain and the Executors, given that they smell of salt/brine/the sea, given the salty/briny smell of her monster lab creecher pools, and given the sea monsters she created, giants of the sea, of which some she left alive "in deep waters, for they were too well-wrought [though these could be cetuses], and Pride stopped her hand":

"Ghilan'nain kept herself apart from the People. She used her power to create animals none had ever seen. The skies teemed with her monsters, the land with her beasts. Andruil hunted them all, and after a year of killing, approached Ghilan'nain with an offer: the gods would share their power with Ghilan'nain, but only if she destroyed her creations, for they were too untamed to remain among the People. Ghilan'nain agreed and asked for three days to undo what she had made. On the first day she struck down the monsters of the air, except those she presented to Andruil as a gift. On the second day she drowned the giants of the sea, except those in deep waters, for they were too well-wrought, and Pride stopped her hand. On the third day she killed the beasts of the land, except the halla, whose grace she loved above all else. This is how Ghilan'nain was made youngest of the gods. —Story of the elven god Ghilan'nain, author unknown"

Back to this line: "Glory to the risen gods. They've come to deliver this world." here, I presume, are two of these risen gods, or these two are the risen gods. the one on the left has a watery motif with those wavy lines (water pouring off them as they rise from the sea), or it looks like seaweed hanging from their crown. in the concept art piece it's also depicted bursting out of the sea.

People connect the lefthand figure to Ghilan'nain, among others. The figure on the right has pointed ears. I think they are Ghil and Elgar'nan.

This speaker also reminded me of the Jaws of Hakkon trailer. the Jaws of Hakkon past and present tried to bring their dragon-formed god to life or free him to destroy the Lowlands. the old Inquisitor and then the new Inquisitor then fought to save Thedosian lands from Hakkon. An Avvar (Gurd) with a not dissimilar English accent to this second trailer speaker (a non-RP one) says "blood will spill before the new moon". the trailers then both end with a godlike entity speaking a threat: "Lowlanders, I am the breath of winter, the cold wind of war. Join me in battle and die" and "All the world will soon share the peace and comfort of my reign". I am not saying that I think the second speaker in the Thedas Calls trailer is an Avvar, a Hakkonite or an Avvar devotee of a different god, or that I think the final speaker in the Thedas Calls trailer is Hakkon or another Avvar god btw. just that I was struck by the similarity of theme and patterns that repeat in Thedas, echoing across time and dimensions.

If not an Old God cultist, I could also see the second speaker being a Venatori or Venatori-type person. the speaker is obviously a follower or cultist of some kind of these "risen gods". the Venatori are arguably a cult, although not precisely of the Old Gods exactly but of one of the High Priests of the Old Gods, the Conductor, who we knew as Corypheus. They see/saw Corypheus as the Elder One and a deity, essentially, and want to restore the glory of Tevinter. They revered him and believed he’d turn them into god-kings when he became a proper god. Although routed by the Inquisitor in DAI, as we know they’re not gone. and Corypheus wasn't the only High Priest of the Old Gods, or the only ancient magister that breached the Fade (and there was more of them besides just the Architect). it's also possible that rather than one of Corypheus' contemporaries the modern Venatori have simply switched to straight up Old God worship, sans Cory-style middleman, and this is a modern Ventatori speaking - and in Tevinter Nights, one prominent Venatori loyalist tried to release a demon that was sealed under Minrathous in a ritual attempt to bring about “Minrathous’ return”. It was thought that the demon is so powerful that only a god (like Corypheus) could summon it. you sure could restore Tevinter to supremacy if you brought back its ancient powerful gods. but more on the god stuff later.

Back to Rivain.

The cave rocks and stalactites give the sense of a toothed maw. the sea water is so bright and blue! in the distance in the sea looks to be a statue (of Andraste?). there's ships wrecked in the waters. the vegetation looks vibrant, and on the shore looks to be the skeleton of a great creature, maybe a dragon or a giant squid type creature that beached and died or died and was washed ashore. I also wonder why there are stalagmites among the ruins? as in why would people build buildings around stalagmites or rock protrusions like that. curious. also, it's cool to see this locale from previous teasers and previous concept art pieces come to life again. Also I feel like the blue dome structure is somehow notable. it feels familiar??

We should also talk about the Rivain blurb. The Antivan Crows in Antiva are not alone in facing something amiss in their nation. The Lords of Fortunes' dominion over Rivaini coasts is slipping because dragons are growing bolder and laying waste to their ships. indeed, the trailer shows a wrecked ship, as does the accompanying art piece, which also features a red dragon curled around a chest of piratey treasure. What could be causing the dragons to grow bolder and attack ships? Is something upsetting or stressing them in the way that wild animals irl may lash out to humans when stressed or predate human livestock/attack humans the more humans encroach on their territory and deplete their natural food sources? Is something or someone controlling them in order to cause havoc (we have examples of people controlling dragons in DA)? Or as dragons, can they just innately sense that something, such as a potential return of dragon-formed dragon-gods, is coming, and are getting stirred up by that feeling? Have they been Blighted or maddened by something? there's that "eastern sea" motif cropping up again btw, and the Rivain blurb also made me wonder if this DA:D codex was written in Rivain about one of the dragons there, especially since it's about a dragon that can swim and catch prey underwater:

this particular dragon has been hunting more than she needs, which could tie to destroying ships (or just be because she has babies). she's also not been attacking [REDACTED] unless they get close to her den, where her babies are. I think it's a fair assumption that the [REDACTED] thing in this codex could be what's behind the weirdly-behaving dragons on the Rivaini coast, and that it's redacted because it's spoilery. I also think it's interesting that this codex specifically mentions the dragon preying on.. squid, a cephalopod. what if she or other dragons in the area ate Cekorax-level mook squidguys that had been like schlorpin' around or near Rivain of late and were driven mad or corrupted by it or something? :<

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Next the trailer travels to the Anderfels, with a roar of battle during the transition. someone yelling a battlecry, and the clang of sword. the third speaker sounds like a hardened fighter, a seasoned commander. he is speaking when he's about to be attacked, or in a pause in battle - like he's in a fortress that is or soon will be under seige. there are cracks, faultlines in the ground in the Anderfels, just like there were in the Antiva map. and indeed, the Anderfels blurb specifically tells us that the land there has recently been shaking with tremors that have been causing disturbances, tremors of unknown cause. around the Anderfels in this map shot are smoky billowing clouds, representing the "storm of ominous intent" that is brewing and darkening the skies, encircling the Anderfels in a way that reminds me of the way the Blight encroached on Fereldan lands on the map of Ferelden in DA:O. the cracks go towards Weisshaupt. we can probably say that we are going to Weisshaupt in DA:D just like we're going to Treviso in DA:D, and we can probably say from this trailer that Weisshaupt is in imminent danger, or maybe even already under attack or laid to waste. it's cool to see this locale from previous teasers and previous concept art pieces come to life again. "far west" also makes me think about the Volca sea and the place beyond it hinted at in World of Thedas, where ships came captained by dwarves talking of a cataclysm.

The griffon obviously represents Weisshaupt fortress. I'm so excited to finally go there for real (but worried about what is happening there). "Grey Wardens don't hide in our castle. I won't ask good soldiers to turn tail and run." - The situation sounds dire. This line also reminded me of Davrin's line in a previous trailer where he heroically said "Nobody dies on my watch! For the Wardens." (I don't think the speaker is Davrin though, the Davrin line just further adds to the stakes of the bad situation the Wardens are probably in rn). Remember, things weren't sounding good for the Wardens in the various DA:I and Trespasser epilogues:

The Grey Wardens of the south slowly rebuild in the months following the events at Adamant. They declare it time for the Order to emerge from the shadows, to join the rest of humanity in fighting their ancient foes. Rumors abound that they severed ties with their leaders at Weisshaupt, and that a bitter war now rages between them. What becomes of Hawke/Loghain/Stroud/Alistair is unknown – save that all news out of Weisshaupt soon ends. Does the sudden silence indicate a battle within... or something far worse? - Those Grey Wardens who survived the battle at Adamant ventured north into exile. They returned to the mighty fortress of Weisshaupt, and word slowly spreads that a battle for control of the Order has erupted. - It is said that Loghain/Stroud/Alistair leads these Wardens in their rebellion, a fight to change the Order from within. - If Hawke reaches Weisshaupt with them is unknown. Indeed, before long, all news out of Weisshaupt ends. - Slowly, the Wardens withdraw from across the north as well. Some believe the ancient order is on the verge of vanishing forever.

There's basically a Warden civil war and Weisshaupt has gone dark, and the Wardens are on the brink. Romanced Warden Blackwall kept getting increasingly urgent messages summoning him to return to Weisshaupt, and eventually when they became too urgent to ignore, he left for the sake of duty, and then years passed and he never returned and is implied to have fallen in the line of duty. (btw, maybe a Warden splinter faction/Warden civil war is the explanation of why we are now seeing a variant version of the traditional Grey Warden heraldry?)

I wonder if this speaker is the First Warden or a high up Warden who is opposed to the First Warden (or a male Hawke who survived DA:I and went to Weisshaupt in the epilogue?? probably not, because by the Trespasser epilogue Hawke has returned and been helping Varric in Kirkwall). I am leaning towards a different leader Warden who is opposed to the First Warden, as opposed to the First Warden themselves. Reason being, the FW commands from Weisshaupt HQ (holed up in a castle) and does not sound to be very frontline battle-like or heroic, unlike the speaker. the FW is said to be mostly caught up in Anderfels politicking, as there the Wardens are regarded as basically nobility, and the FW offers little guidance to the Order or its commanders. they are said to be mostly a figurehead, and even the Hero of Ferelden themself, right after stopping the Fifth Blight could "expect little assistance or guidance so far from the Anderfels" cleaning up the darkspawn dregs in Ferelden in Awakening, because:

Even those close to Weisshaupt learn to suffer alone. The murmurs are true—the First Warden is often embroiled in the politics of the Anderfels and has little opportunity to consider worldly matters. I would like to believe it is a matter of survival, not of political self-interest. [source]

This line, "Grey Wardens don't hide in our castle. I won't ask good soldiers to turn tail and run", it doesn't sound like something such a figurehead would say. assuming it's still the same First Warden in command, it sounds like the FW's focus in the years before and since the Fifth Blight IS political self-interest rather than survival or for the Order's survival (distracted from the Grey Warden original purpose/duty at best, potentially something much darker and far worse, in that way that Wardens are wont to do - see what they got up to in DA:I etc). it sounds like the FW's actions have caused a segment of the Wardens to resent them and maybe rebel, try to take control back of the order. this is probably part of what's caused the schism/civil war/disarray. and I think the trailer speaker sounds like someone who is opposed to the FW and their 'type of Wardening'. I would not be surprised if this is a sort of rebel faction leader that we meet, and if in the years since DA:I, it's no longer Loghain/Stroud/Alistair that is leading the Warden rebellion to change the Order from within and is instead this speaker. (you could easily write that 'in the years since, X had to go and do something elsewhere and Speaker Warden took up the reins'. Heck if it's 9:52 some of them could have been due their Calling.. this would also remove the need to spend the resources to have 3 models and 3 sets of specific lines for the 3 characters in the same role. instead of a "Wrex or Wreave or Wreave2 oR EVEN HAWKE" situation, in the time since DA:I the quantum for that whole role could have been collapsed and it's just like "hello, I am previously-unknown Krogan Leader, Warden Wron Wreasely".)

Anyways, I think the next shot is also the Anderfels (the trailer shows 2x Antiva shots, 2x Rivain shots, 1 Tevinter/general northern Thedas shot and so it would make sense for these two to be 2x Anderfels shots), specifically I think it's Weisshaupt, and I think it shows Weisshaupt after some kind of attack or cataclysm, explaining what the epilogues were alluding to and why it has gone dark. See here.

"[this image is Weisshaupt] after some kind of attack? like the ruins of Weisshaupt after something terrible went wrong. There’s a blue flag in this image like there are in this one. in this image of Weisshaupt something terrible, bright and green and magic (Fadey?) is going on outside. this last image to me has the feel of the ‘aftermath’ of that one, especially if it was a kind of magic explosion/attack. in the new trailer, the Grey Warden character is still talking when it pans to this scene, and it pans to this scene right after the view of the Anderfels on the map, where we saw cracks in the ground spreading ominously towards Weisshaupt. the trailer also shows 2 shots of Antiva and 2 of Rivain. I think there’s 2 of the Anderfels too (map + this one) before the final view of 1 pic of the northern coast. last time we heard from the Wardens as well, it sounded like some weird and strange and dangerous stuff was going down there too." [source]

So it sounds like this is what's befallen the Wardens, beyond their general disarray from their civil war. this image is so interesting to me. there's a green tinge in the sky, reminding me of the Fade/Breach and as mentioned, of that concept art. the atmosphere is so dark and ominous, lightning cracking in the sky just as the ground on the maps cracked with fault lines. it heavily reminds me of the Bad Red Lyrium Future in DA:I in atmosphere and tone, and if you look here there could be the suggestion of red lyrium on this door (alarm klaxon!!).

also, is it just me, or can we see the pattern of carved griffon wings on this door/gateway or the stone around the door/gateway in this shot? also when the lightning flashes and illuminated things for a moment, I wondered if there were a few tiny figures on the clifftop in the distance, but maybe I am just seeing things.

The red lyrium is obviously alarming. it and the whole atmosphere of this shot immediately reminds me of the old EA Play 'spooky tree' teaser, with its dark skies, ominous setting, and red lyrium coiling around the tree and on parts of a building.

I am wondering if ^ this is the same place as this. (no it doesn't look like dry badlands Anderfels climate conditions, but if a magic cataclysm of some kind has taken place or things got somehow warped, local climate conditions could also be impacted unnaturally). Another reason beyond the red lyrium that I say this is: these shots also look to be from the same location, and what have we here?

A statue of Andraste in the 'red lyrium darkspawn' location, and a statue of Andraste on the Anderfels map in the new teaser. I know the Anders are devout and there's the Our Lady of the Anderfels statue of her there. and I know that there's also a possible statue of Andraste in the Rivain coast shot, and indeed of her all over Thedas. but I'm 👁️ because the presentation of these ones juxtaposed like this struck me, as did the similar conditions from the 'spooky tree teaser'/'red lyrium darkspawn' location compared to the 'Anderfels 2' shot. if red lyrium darkspawn would surface anywhere, I could see it most likely to be in the Blight-wracked Anderfels, and I could also see some of the Wardens fucking around with red lyrium in order to try and gain power to combat the Blight, or information about the Blight in order to stop it (red lyrium being Blighted), and so inadvertently causing red lyrium to spread all over Weisshaupt. we also have this concept:

of a barren wasteland, red-eyed (red lyrium..) creatures/undead, a red lyrium afflicted ruined part of a big building like from a fortress, a red lyrium-affected tree twisting towards the sky, and the ever present 'trapped Evanuris Dragon Age 4 concentric circles' 'concentric circles with hemispheres' motif in the sky. and again the ominous atmosphere, darkness, and green tinge in the sky reminds me of the 'Anderfels 2' shot in the new trailer.

Aside from that, what are these rings? is it part of a puzzle, or part of a platforming type mechanic? the thing they remind me of rly is the rings from the Jaws of Hakkon DLC. these were part of the ruined structures of a temple Razikale (an Old God, which.. of course the Wardens fight them in Blights when they become corrupted into Archdemons) in the Frostback Basin. in the quest On Ameridan's Trail, the Inquisitor pulls leavers to activate these things, which are trail markers, and they point to the next trail marker through a ring. the first of these markers is outside of Razikale's Reach, and activating them all gains the Inky access to the next quest.

maybe the rings in the teaser are part of a similar mechanism? I feel like it would be a sort of delicious and tragic irony if one of the two last remaining Old Gods (who btw are Lusacan and.. Razikale) were slumbering in the Deep Roads right deep beneath Weisshaupt. or perhaps Weisshaupt itself was built on the site or on the bones of a temple to the Old Gods? as to why that wondering is relevant, in this scenario maybe the ring things were part of a temple to the Old God that once stood on that site?

all of this is interesting considering we know that Wardens fight corrupted Old Gods as Archdemons, the Old Gods sleep trapped underground until burrowing darkspawn find and Taint them, two remain, "glory to the risen gods" and there are tremors in the ground in the Anderfels. and especially considering the DA:D concept art that people often call the 'Double Blight' concept art, which features a Warden and companions fighting darkspawn with 2 horrid weird Blighted-looking Archdemon-looking Old-god-looking dragons in the background. especially considering the 'gold dragon' and 'dark dragon' in the vinyl art. etc

so it seems that a sleeping Old God rising/escaping from underground could be a potential reason for the tremors in the Anderfels. BUT there are other very possible reasons too. these include: the Titans, who are "the pillars of the earth" and possessed of massive, tectonic-platelike power; the cataclysm from across the Volca Sea somehow spreading to the Anderfels; and the underground Ghilan'nain (ol' Ghil crops up again) monster labs from Tevinter Nights. in Horror of Hormak, some Wardens venture into the Deep Roads, find mutated darkspawn, yellow-green lyrium, a sea salt/briny smell, and deep elven ruins with the monster lab carvings on the wall. an enormous centipede monster comes out of the pool. the story ends by telling us that Ramesh has to warn the other Wardens, as the lab he found was only one of twelve. so it's also possible that the tremors are another one of these monster labs and another monster rising from a pool.

There are also some interesting inscriptions from Razikale's reach, written by those who worshipped her.

To She Who Winds the Skein of Wisdom, we dedicate this citadel. Dragon of Mystery, bestow upon your faithful servants your ineffable truth. Grant us eyes to pierce the darkness and souls to bear the wounds of your labyrinth.

For me this harks back to "Enter the world of Thedas, a vibrant land of rugged wilderness, treacherous labyrinths, and glittering cities."

Razikale, O Shadow Which Obscures the Path Ahead, deliver your faithful, save us from the silence which devours

This reminds me of "Glory to the risen gods who come to deliver this world."

Dragon of Mystery, return to us, we beg you.

"The risen gods": risen, returned

If the Imperium has fallen, we shall build it anew. This citadel shall be a new Minrathous, and we who serve the Twisted Path shall be its Magisterium. Praise be to Razikale—may our raised voices reach her and bring her back to us at last.

Bring her back, risen. Building Tevinter anew, "all the world shall soon share the peace and comfort of my reign". I'm not saying I think Speaker 4 is Razikale, just that these things remind me of one another. Lusacan perhaps however..

The other thing about the Andefels is that in the accompanying image from the blog post, there's a brewing storm on the horizon. I imagine that if an Old God or other monster roses from out of the ground in a dusty land it would cause a big old dust cloud or storm that darkens the skies. I wonder if this is what this art piece depicts? the eye is also drawn to the small red items in the bottom left hand corner - some kind of plant, or small red lyrium crystals? also as an aside I liked that one of the Wardens is an elf. Maybe that's Antoine, and the Warden sitting down is Evka? they could just look shorter because of sitting down and the angle though, and I guess the weapons of choice don't match for these two Wardens to be Antoine and Evka. also I thought the knightly Warden's spear/polearm was cool and think it would be super cool if those were options for warriors as weapons in DA:D.

Lastly the trailer pans to this shot, which shows part of northern Thedas - including Tevinter - coastline, and other parts of the Thedas map which have featured in the new trailer thus far (panned out).

It doesn't say "Tevinter" on the map in that shot, but we're looking at the Nocen Sea and the land around it, including Seheron. On the right are the white spires of Treviso city in Antiva again, Crows flying out from it. Beyond that is the hint of Rivain, with its 'squid'. We can see Minrathous clearly on the left, and a mass of tentacles or snake-like pattern twining through Tevinter (mentioned here) but which have not yet reached Minrathous. Cracks in the ground in Tevinter are also apparent, and so it's likely in Tevinter too. we can also see Arlathan Forest (breathes into paper bag) and the outline of the mountain called the White Spire.

In the Forest is the suggestion of aravels, which remind you of these 'flying aravels' (halla circled, elven scene pictured) / 'flying ships' from this concept art, which in turn resemble Dalish aravels. I feel like this in turn confirms that this concept art is of a place nearby or in Arlathan Forest:

which, given that the Veil Jumpers are an alliance of Dalish mages and hunters along (with some non-elves), it makes sense that there would be elfy/Dalish-looking aravels/ships there. Aravels were said to float by a magic method in a specific scenario in the Last Flight, but perhaps, given the space-time reality warping happening recently in Arlathan Forest (DA: The Missing, Ruins of Reality), and the Veil Jumpers' eponymous ability to navigate this, perhaps this explains why the aravels can float in this area, in a place where up is down and down is up etc. also the floating rocks stuff is classically Fadey, classically magic. In turn, the biome/vegetation etc in this art crops up a lot in the Veil Jumper images, see here (the yellowy/amber vegetation, the trees, floating stuff etc).

Now about Speaker 4, "all the world shall soon know the peace and comfort of my reign". As he speaks, the purpley foreboding clouds float over and encircle northern Thedas. Speaker 4 could be one of the 'risen gods' that Speaker 2 refers to earlier in the trailer (Speaker 4 obviously isn't Solas). This section reminds me a lot of the DA:I Enemy of Thedas trailer. I don't think it's Cory, but the vibe, voices and sentiments are similar. The Elder One comes etc. Cory was all like "Bow before your new god and be spared", "I am worthy of godhood" etcetc. I wonder if Speaker 4 is another ancient Magister like Cory, one of the others of that group? Some other fanatical Tevinter cult leader (as opposed to cultist like Speaker 2 may be), like a Venatori leader, or the Archon or the Black Divine? the voice of the squid monster? one of the Forgotten Ones? one of the Forbidden Ones - the Formless One? an entity we've not yet heard of? the voice of an Old God, two of whom have now risen/returned? ("Risen" would make sense if you had to literally.. rise out of the ground LOL). I sorta lean towards the Old God or Old God priest/ancient magister idea, because when Speaker 4 finishes speaking, his voice deepens and "reign" rolls into the SFX of like a big beast's growl or rumble, like a dragon growling. & and the Old Gods are dragons, and a divine pretender like Cory already had a dragon himself. If it is an Old God, we could probably guess at it being Lusacan, as the voice sounds like a dude and Lusacan is referred to with he pronouns. and Lusacan is one of the two remaining sleeping OGs along with Razikale (who in contrast is referred to with she pronouns). Call of the Dark also said this:

“Lusacan, the Dragon of Night, calls to you. He lives where it is darkest and waits for the day he will rise. Drink of his blood and know the power in darkness: either fear the Night or wield it."

I guess Lusacan's day could have come? "The darkspawn yearn to awaken and corrupt Lusacan to start a new age of darkness." we talked about the Last Moon cult already,

the Last Moon are/were a cult dedicated to Lusacan. Early in the Dragon Age, they abducted and ritualistically murdered several people. Their goal at that time was to cause the start of a terrible battle, in order to cover Thedas in “a night that will never end” (Lusacan being the Dragon of Night).

it wouldn't be the first time Lusacan has cult followers of late. the eternal night idea is interesting to me too. the speaker doesn't say "MY REIGN WILL BE BLOODY, FIERY, AND AWFUL I WILL TORTURE YOU ALL FOR ETERNITY". it will still be bad and he is still gonna rule, but he frames it in terms of a creepy sense of peace, security and comfort. night-times can obviously be creepy (fear of the dark etc) but they're also a time of peace, quiet, when we sleep in our beds, comfortable, underneath blankets in the blackness, ensconced in darkness. a 'in the womb' type darkness I guess, shared eternal sleep, Sloth in DA:O type vibes. (thinking also again of Titus' cult where he was going to use Dreamer abilities to brainwash all of Thedas and become a dragon god/old god. Dreaming links to that imagery of peaceful comfortable sleep, and if you were brainwashed to think you were living a peaceful live in a comfortable place, well, you would.).

Another possibility is that Speaker 4 is an Evanuris, who are said to be 'Evil Gods' that would return if Solas brings down the Veil. - and I think this is what's most likely precisely because of the "Evil Gods" stuff in Trespasser and the BioWare 25 year book. Flemythal needs/needed Solas' plan to succeed and them to be released for her to take her vengeance and kill them, you can't kill someone locked away from your realm in magical prison. I also wonder if it's Elgar'nan because of:

and

(staff shape), as well as:

there is also the eclipse-style imagery in the in-game Dragon Age: Dreadwolf cinematic and a bunch of previous sun/moon motifs/references floating around e.g. Dalish lore holds Mythal created the moon and was born of the sea (so a moon connection there via the tides), and that Elgar'nan opposite her is the Eldest of the Sun, the guy who buried the Sun, the Pools of the Sun etc. also those art assets of overlapping spheres, repeating/concentric circles etc. [...] left [in the vinyl art], silvery dragon - Mythal? right dragon (which is gold-toned despite the blackening) - Elgar'nan, after he’s approached her [maybe as the figure on the rock promontory] and then murdered her and taken her place as the god, ruler, dragon who presides over all? moon and sun, moon dragon and sun dragon, beauty and destruction.. the shape of the 'right-hand’ dragon’s horns match the evanuris headpiece on the ring which is in the biggest hemisphere, and of the 7 gods those headpieces apply to (9 Evanuris, minus Mythal and Fen'Harel), the 'biggest’ naturally is the patriarch leader opposite Mythal, Elgar'nan. [quoting myself from here]

If it was Elgar'nan I would ascend, primarily bc I simply think he is the most metal of all the potential options ('wanna fight Elgar'nan' since 2014 squad!!). and also I am for some reason an Elgar'nan truther, like if you said, MJ, you're just suggesting literally all possibilities here in this post, who do you think it actually is and you can only choose one in your answer? (Elgar'nan, and I think this is him too). But I would like to say that the actual things the speaker says remind me somewhat of Falon'din, god of death and fortune and guide in the Beyond. There is A Certain type of vanity inherent in the idea that if you ruled all the world, everyone would be knowing the peace and comfort of your reign. sounds more vain and insidious than random basal cruelty or tyranny. and Solas says of Falon'Din in the Temple of Mythal:

"I do not believe they sing songs about Falon'Din's vanity. It is said Falon'Din's appetite for adulation was so great, he began wars to amass more worshippers. The blood of those who wouldn't bow low filled lakes as wide as oceans. Mythal rallied the gods, once the shadow of Falon'Din's hunger stretched across her own people. It was almost too late. Falon'Din only surrendered when his brethren bloodied him in his own temple."

And like Tamlen identifies this statue as Falon'Din in DA:O (and also noting that this statue follows a design which was an old discarded design for the Old Gods' appearance before the title of the series made it so they had to change them into dragons). I could imagine the peace and comfort of my reign line coming from such an entity. So I feel like in a way Falon'Din matches the vibe of the line more than Elgar'nan, who seems to be more of the fiery anger, aggressively lashing out type.

But MJ, I hear you say, how can Speaker 4 be an Evanuris rather than an Old God when it peels off into a dragon growl? Well my friend, there is dragon stuff up in the Evanuris' grill as well, may I introduce you to the idea that: "The Evanuris Were [all] Dragons[haped sometimes]"

of course, if you subscribe to the 'Old Gods and Evanuris are the same, or linked somehow' theories, it could be both an OG and an Evanuris, or both, in a manner of speaking. and there is a link for example between Falon'Din and Lusacan suggested by Tenebrium. in which case the Razikale pairing could be Razikale-Ghilan'nain for instance, given the Ghil presence in the lore and the monster labs etc.

"Called "Shadow" in the common parlance, likely due to the ancient association of the constellation Tenebrium with Lusacan, the Old God of darkness and the night. It is odd, however, that the depiction for this constellation has always been an owl and not a dragon, even in the Tevinter texts. This lends credence to the widely-held belief that Tenebrium was a name meant to supplant an older, elven association—perhaps with the elven god Falon'Din, sometimes represented in tales as a giant owl. There is, of course, another explanation: owls are nocturnal hunters, and among earlier people, were considered terrifying omens of loss."

Speaker 4 also sounds like a or one of the big bads. ofc 'Solas is not the real big bad, something else is afoot' is a long-running theory, the idea that he's a red herring or perhaps 'The Dragon' to something else (perhaps Mythal or another non-supergood entity that he's trying to stop, say, Speaker 4), like how Loghain is an antagonist but he can even be recruited, and the real overarching enemy in that story is the Blight/Archdemon.

The trailer ends with an echoing, wolf-Fen'Harel howl. I thought it was neat how that followed right after the rumbling draconic growl, like a warning of the danger of that entity, or Solas following in its trail on its heels to oppose or try to stop it, yelling a war cry as they go to do battle or something. the dragon growl into wolf howl also reminded me of Fen'Harel's draconic wolf/lupine dragon appearance as described in TN.

Overall, I feel like the speakers in the trailer aren't companions but important NPCs we will meet (for example I think Davrin sounds like a more likely Warden companion than Warden Speaker 3 from this trailer).

In general, the trailer showcases, or rather teases, some of the locations we will go to in DA:D and confirms Antiva, Rivain, and the Anderfels along with the already-confirmed Tevinter. I wonder if we will go to Nevarra at all? the scope (at least four countries) seems like a lot but I would guess that these would be smaller zones within each of the countries, like the different zones for the main questlines in DA:O or something, rather than straight up an open-world or four massive open-world maps. With the water in Rivain coastline, I wonder if swimming makes its series debut? and with so many different countries involved, I wonder again about us travelling around via eluvians on a commandeered portion of the eluvian network, and it + the Rivain stuff also makes me think of the common fan theory that we will have a ship base. Minrathous and Treviso are also on the coast incidentally, we could like sail between them.

It also seems that the trailer lends credence to the idea that these three factions, Antivan Crows, Lords of Fortune, and the Grey Wardens are important factions in the game. Perhaps we will have a companion from each of these groups, or perhaps these are different backstories (I'm saying backstories because we don't know if it's selectable backgrounds like in DA:I or playable origins like in DA:O, and because I feel like playable origins isn't as likely) the PC can be from. this would make sense, as we need to "find people he doesn't know", while in Tevinter Nights groups which Solas seems to have more detailed knowledge of, and groups which are interested in moving against Solas, were mentioned (Carta, Mortalitasi, Tevinter Siccari, Qunari Ben-Hassrath, Inquisition remnants, Executors - note that the Lords of Fortune, Antivan Crows and Grey Wardens were not among these). Wardens can be any class and the order has humans, dwarves and elves in it. The LoFs contain humans, dwarves, and elves and there's no lore saying mages can't be LoFs (mages would make good treasure-hunters too). the Crows contain humans and elves, Calien d'Evaliste was a mage Crow. given where Crow recruits sometimes come from you could probably write a Surface Dwarf Crow. there are assasins in the Carta, so it's not like a dwarven assassin is a crazy idea or something.

Some of the text from the blog entry is also worth mentioning. at the top, character focus and a "few returning characters" (I wonder if this means characters beyond Solas and Varric..?) was exciting. other quotes of note compiled below:

we’re sharing a look at a few of the in-game locations you’ll explore on this new adventure (and perhaps a little more for those who listen closely). The stage is set. The Dread Wolf is ready to make his move.

More locations if we listen closely? is there hints hidden in the trailer audio? can anyone confirm?

This time, you’ll be venturing to places unseen and returning to places from long ago.

Does this mean we will visit ruins of / what remains of ancient places in Thedas in DA:D, that we will visit places back in time temporally in DA:D, see echoes in the Fade, or that in DA:D we will return to locations we visited in earlier games in the series?

We stand on the precipice of change.

hello Flemeth advice/prophecy reference (“We stand upon the precipice of change. The world fears the inevitable plummet into the abyss. Watch for that moment... and when it comes, do not hesitate to leap. It is only when you fall that you learn whether you can fly.”)

This time, however, much more of Thedas is yours to see. The desolate, beautiful badlands of the Anderfels with curtains of distant mountainous spires. The twisting canals and gleaming towers of Antiva, where Crows may lurk in any shadow. The turquoise seas of Rivain with its rushes of greenery and hardy sea-faring people. And of course, there’s more.

Anderfels badlands: the DA:D team's location scouting visit to Drumheller badlands in Alberta now makes sense. ^^ this description of the locales is also 👌

We felt this was best for the tale we wanted to tell this time and we hope you enjoy it as much as we have! It’s allowed us to create many more locations than past games, including both some you’ve longed to go to…and some you’ve never heard of before!

ヽ(°〇°)ﾉ places we've never even heard of before! The places Beyond Thedas like Amaranth and Par Ladi, type of places, or places we've never even heard the names of before ever?

An insult that he took as a badge of pride. An insult to inspire hope in his friends and fear in his enemies. That is what Fen’Harel, the Dread Wolf, truly is. Not a man who sees himself as evil, but someone who believes he’s fighting for a good cause and is willing to get his hands dirty.

dragon age dragon age dragon age

we’ll have much more to share with you as we approach Summer 2024.

this comment makes it sound like there will be a few bits of info in the lead up to Summer 2024.

Know this, though: The Dread Wolf has not been idle these past years. His reach is far, and soon his plans will come to fruition—a cataclysmic rejoining of magic and realms hundreds of years in the making. Will you be able to stop him? We hope so.

I wonder if these past years in-world are the timeskip that takes us to 9:52? the cataclysmic rejoining of magic and realms again make it sound like the Veil is definitely coming down.

anyways those are some thoughts for now. ^^

if you have any thoughts pls let me know. ^^ also I'm sorry that this post is so rambly and it like talks about multiple theories all mashed up at once, has some repetitive elements etc. but if you read this far I hope you enjoyed dragon ageing with me. (❁´◡`❁)

#dragon age: dreadwolf #dragon age 4 #the dread wolf rises #da4 #dragon age #bioware #video games #longpost #long post #mj meta #solas #dragon age: the missing #dragon age: the missing spoilers #alistair theirin #fav warden #sry this is late tho u can see by the length why it took so long #but also i dont know how it got that long. i ramble >0< but this was fun #there is a lot in this trailer imo

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genericpuff · 7 months

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Omg hiiii, I absolutely love Rekindled! You're so talented, and the story you're making for Persephone is so intriguing! A lot more than whatever trashfire Lore Olympus has become.

That being said, what was the moment you stopped liking LO Persephone? Have you always disliked her, or was it gradual? Or just a specific moment that made you go "yeaaaaah.. she's not it ;-;"

(And bonus question if I can ask, but how do you draw hands?? I hate them with a passion, but unfortunately hands are pretty necessary T^T)

aahhh thank you so much!!!

honestly, I was a pretty big fan of LO up until the trial arc. Like, you've all seen me hate this comic with a fiery passion, but the only reason I'm able to do that is because before I hated this comic, I loooved this comic. I'd literally be counting down the hours until new updates, I loved the art, and I was too smitten by the appeal of the series to notice its writing problems, I just loved the romantic drama and the H x P ship, and yes, I loved Persephone, I loved her design, her personality, and I felt so 'seen' by her struggles, both with her trying to pave a path for herself and the SA plotline. I was even (regrettably) one of those people who would lurk in the antiLO tags and think "wow, these people are dumb, can't they see how brilliantly written this is ?? they're nitpicking!"

But then the trial arc happened which involved writing a plot that didn't put the romance front and center anymore - now that Rachel had to actually write something complex and logic-driven, the blinders started to fall off and I went wait... maybe Rachel doesn't know what she's doing. Persephone choosing her own lawyer? And it's Hades, one of the judges? Why are they suddenly establishing Thanatos as Hades' adoptive son? I'm not a lawyer, but I know that's not how any of this works and it really tipped me off that something was amiss, that Persephone was having all of her solutions conveniently handed to her on a platter and all of the other characters were suddenly being made to look like assholes just to make Hades and Persephone the heroes.

And then... Eris happened.

See, one of the things I loved most in the story was Persephone's character arc concerning the Act of Wrath. I write stories about characters with dark "personas" all of the time. So it was something I had frame of reference for, I really loved the premise of Persephone earning her name through this act of violence and while it was dashed with the opening of S2 revealing it was "all an accident", I was excited to see how the trial arc would bring about new information and confirm who was telling the truth about what "really happened" with the Act of Wrath. If the courtroom drama wasn't gonna be realistic, I could at least hope for some good 'OBJECTION!' reveal that would finally put to rest once and for all what really happened, and maybe Kore would finally embrace this 'dark side' she had.

So for the actual twist to suddenly reveal itself as... 'actually, this one goddess we've never mentioned before blessed you with wrath. why? idk she just did. anyways she's the reason you have wrath and that's what made you commit the act of wrath. problem solved.'

And that was where the twisting of 'faith' happened. When I went through the subconscious realization of , "Oh no, Rachel doesn't know what she's doing and it took me this long to notice. Oh no, maybe those antiLO freaks had a point-"

That said, there was a glimmer of hope in the midseason finale. Persephone was sentenced to remain in the Mortal Realm to carry out her mother's duties and I thought, "great! This will be Persephone's Rocky moment! She'll have to prove herself without the help of Demeter or Hades! This is gonna be awesome!!" During the hiatus, I was VERY excited to see where the story was going, I still had so much hope and I figured the mishandling of the trial arc was just a bump in the road. The series was still good, it was just going through a rough patch, these things happen.

And then it came back and it all went downhill from there. There was a 10 year time skip with very little insight as to what happened. Minthe and Daphne were just suddenly back to normal. They were referencing some food shortage or terrible event that happened during Persephone's reign that they never explained in explicit detail. And now, all of a sudden, Persephone was just returning to the Underworld, where Kronos had suddenly taken over. I had cautious optimism but throughout it, I was really seeing the cracks that were already forming opening wide. A lot of what I had to say wasn't positive anymore, I literally couldn't understand what the reasoning was behind these writing decisions and I couldn't find myself rooting for Persephone anymore, everything just seemed to convenient and easy for her to make her seem like the "strong and confident" character the comic claimed her to be.

The S2 finale was my breaking point and I think it was for a lot of other people too. That was pretty much where my 'transformation' from passionate stan to passionate critic happened, and it happened alongside the creation of the UnpopularLoreOlympus subreddit which would become my new 'home' within the community. After seeing how much the story had gone downhill, it made me realize in hindsight just how awful and one-note Persephone is, how she really never cared about anyone but herself and Hades, how her mother did, actually, have a point about her being practically groomed into a relationship with a billionaire slave driver, how she was very intentionally drawn to look like a child in ways I couldn't believe I had never noticed before, the list of "awakenings" goes on. And it sucked! It sucked to have that realization that the thing I loved wasn't just imperfect, but incredibly problematic in its writing and art choices. And just like when I loved the comic, I couldn't just let go of it, I had to understand to some degree why this happened.

It happened because Persephone was always being written as a one-note, easy to project onto self-insert character. A Wattpad protagonist. Not an actual representation of the Goddess of Spring, but a blank slate for the creator and the fans to imagine themselves as purely for the power fantasy of hooking up with a rich and abusive guy.

That was when I made my first piece of LO art intended to be an 'edit' - a redraw of Persephone's rebirth as the Dread Queen from the S2 finale, an ode to the Persephone I was hoping to see but never got. The rest from there is history.

youtube

I know I'm being SUPER dramatic about it but this was literally how it felt to go through the realization that this comic - and its characters - wasn't as good as I thought it was, and I think that's a sentiment that's shared by a lot of the 'haters' in this community. LO was a big part of my life and even some of my friendships with people, so when it went downhill, it felt like such a hit to the gut. It's still a big part of my life, albeit in the opposite direction, but I still wonder sometimes over the "what ifs", what if the series hadn't turned out this way? What if I had never realized its flaws? Rekindled is basically a love letter to those what ifs, satisfying the feelings I never got to keep with LO, and giving me a reason to count down the hours on Saturday nights again. I'm glad it's made that same impact for others, too <3

#lmao this turned into some really deep catharsis post #i never explained how to draw hands #i'll make a post about that in a bit lmaooo #this is what happens when i'm given free reign in my blog posts #i go off way too much JFDKASLFJDKSLA #but it's a story i like to tell because it reminds me why i do all this to begin with #lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus #ama #anon ama #anon ask me anything #ask me anything

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wheelsup30 · 2 months

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Rehab. (Spencer Reid X GN!Reader) Blurb

word count: 510

cw: addiction, rehab, allusions to relapsing

(Note: there'll probably be a few things like this in this little story universe I'll be naming two-headed boy. its part of me rewriting spencer's addiction arc, but not the main plotline since that will not include x readers.)

Meeting new people was always hard, but going to rehab was harder, so you allowed yourself a bit of leeway with how social you were at this new place. It had been a friend that recommended it, seeing how bad you were struggling even with the fact you had finally begun to open up to them. Attending meetings was a no-go, you'd just leave after clamming up for an hour and drinking shitty coffee in a community hall. Things got dire, so rehab it was.

You spotted him the first day, sitting in the corner and reading a worn copy of some book you didn't care enough to glance at the cover of at a speed that made you think he was just staring at the pretty pictures instead. Not that you'd judge that, you'd spent 5 minutes in the centre and already were so bored you’d considered leaving.

Eventually the worker that led you into the day room went to get a cup of coffee, so you sat tentatively next to the young man, trying your best not to disturb him.

“You're new,” He points out curiously, having put his book down while you were counting the cracks on the ceiling. It startles you, but you nod, a tight smile on your lips.

“You're reading pretty fast,” You counter, showing your own observational skills, but you almost laugh out loud at his response.

“Actually, this is pretty slow for me. I wanted to, uh…soak in the words…” The man’s brows twitch oddly and you feel endeared already.

“Escapism?”

"Addicts crave oblivion" he'd told you, and you wondered where you'd heard that before, tilting your head as you listen.

"So what are you running from?" you asked in return, watching him avoid eye contact, you could see him thinking and going over it all…clearly it was a lot. “Yeah…me too…” you mumble, knowing all too well what trauma does to addicts.

The guy pulls another odd face, his mouth almost a straight line, it makes you chuckle and forget about the fire burning in the back of your head for a moment. “How is it…going…for you?” He asks carefully, clearly too scared to use words like addiction or sobriety. That would make it real.

“Four months.” You answer, though you aren't entirely sure that's true, it's all a blur and you'd rather not track it at all. “You?”

“Eight.”

It's a heavy number. So close to that coveted milestone and twice over what you had achieved so far.

“Does it g-”

“No.” He clearly doesn't even need to hear the rest of your question, it was the question every addict heard no matter what month of sobriety they'd made it to.

“Is it worth it..?” You ask hesitantly, watching the cogs turn in his head through his big doe eyes. The silence that follows stretches long enough that you start to get an inkling what the answer might be, but then he finally speaks again.

“It will be.” He nods firmly, finally looking you in the eyes.

#leowrites #criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x gn reader #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds x gn reader #this series is finally coming to fruition im so nervous

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instantcaramel · 10 months

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A month ago I went to Amsterdam and visited all the filming locations for Ted Lasso‘s „Sunflowers“, so I figured I‘ll finally put something together here.

First of all, basically all the scenes involving the majority of the Richmond himbos were not shot on location - their epic discussion followed by pillow fight was filmed in an abandoned hotel in London. (Info per David Elsendoorn). The same would go for Ted & Beard‘s room. Scenes on the bus or outside it were also filmed in Richmond.

The only Greyhound who doesn‘t have his own larger plotline in the episode who was actually in Amsterdam was David Elsendoorn, because they did film the first scenes at Johan Cruijff (you know how to pronounce it now!) ArenA, the home of Ajax Amsterdam (which is also the one place I didn‘t have time to visit). They could have easily filmed that in London in a different stadium but I guess they didn‘t want to pass up the opportunity - and give David something to do on his home turf.

Edit: I visited 3 months later, so here‘s some pics from the ArenA, I couldn‘t find out which hallway they used/dressed up for the press interviews, but here‘s some shots from the stadium and the VIP lounge we see at the beginning.

So, first up is Roy & Jamie‘s adventure: Jamie takes him sightseeing against his will, and the first place they stop on is Magere Brug (Skinny Bridge). (They run up the street to that before.)

Edit thanks to @warriorhoneybee: Roy grabs Jamie’s wrist at Diamond Factory on Rokin and then tells him he can‘t ride a bike outside Lyppens Jeweler at Langebruugsteg.

They go around the corner to Oude Turfmarkt (which is what I took a picture of) for Jamie to teach him how. For Grandad!!!

The fucking windmill they see before they lovingly gaze into each other’s eyes is De Riekermolen at the Southern end of Amstelpark, where they also cycle. (It‘s actually realistic for them to do that, it would be about half an hour between those locations by bike).

Rebecca doesn‘t see the obvious bike lane (that doesn‘t actually exist there) and falls into the gracht at Raamgracht. Boaty McBoatface‘s houseboat is still there, they just had it dressed up a bit with plants and such when they filmed. (Unclear if anyone currently lives there). The interiors were shot in a studio.

Trent follows Colin to Prik night club (which was absolutely buzzing when I was there, I really want to go back).

And then they sit at the Homomonument, the Pink Triangle memorial at Westerkerk, having that tearjerker of a conversation, before returning to party. (It walked that distance at night, it‘s a beautiful stroll and less than 10 minutes). When I visited someone had left sunflowers. 🌻

Leslie & Will first go to Hotel Prins Hendrik in the Red Light district (and steps away from Amsterdam main station) where Chet Baker died. They then make their way to Jazz Café Alto, which is just down the road from where Boom Chicago used to be on Leidseplein. (It‘s about 30 mins on foot between those two locations so they could have walked or just taken the tram for a few stops. The interiors were done at a studio though).

Ted of course visits the studio-filmed fictional themed restaurant where he has a BBQ sauce induced, Corey Burton-narrated epiphany about triangles, but first he sees Vincent‘s „Sunflowers“ at Van Gogh Museum during Museumnacht (which btw would mean the episode is set first weekend of November). As you can tell they moved some things around, so at least currently the painting isn‘t hung on that beautiful blue wall anymore.

As a bonus, here is a picture of where Boom Chicago used to be when Jason Sudeikis, Brendan Hunt and Joe Kelly performed there - Brendan also used to live above the McDonald‘s on Leidseplein just steps away for a while. And the other picture is the current Boom Chicago on Rozengracht, definitely go enjoy a show there if you can.

Anyway thus concludeth my trip around Ted Lasso‘s Amsterdam. I visited for the Boom Chicago Comedy Festival and fell in love with the city, it was … magical / gezellig. I will never forget it, but then again, some people get Alzheimer’s.

#ted lasso #filming locations #amsterdam #boom chicago #jason sudeikis #brendan hunt #david elsendoorn #ted lasso cast #brett goldstein #phil dunster #hannah waddingham #matteo van der grijn #rebecca welton #roy kent #jamie tartt #leslie higgins #will kitman #charlie hiscock #jan maas

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hellfire--cult · 10 months

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Baring Teeth {Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader} - Ch. 10

Edit of Eddie: pitifulbaby

Chapters: Masterlist (Go here to see list of chapters, plotline and general warnings.)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Non-Traditional Omegaverse, Slow burn, Modern!AU, Mechanic!Eddie

⚠️This chapter contains: Mean!Eddie, Angst, traumatic past, painful procedures (gyno), cheating, Billy x reader at the beginning

wc: 7k

Crossposted on: Wattpad & AO3

A/N: Well shit, I did say it will take a turn and shift. Hopefully you all enjoy this chapter, it was painful to write, but it is needed for you guys to know about the backstory of it all. If you see real closely, you'll see a part of this chapter that was actually in previous chapters ;)

Anyways, Enjoy! ❤️ And don't forget to always support me by hitting the reblog button or leave a comment!

<- Prev. chapter - Next chapter ->

CHAPTER 10

Two dates turned into three.

Three dates turned into four.

Four turned into eight.

And you lost count.

“All I’m saying is that Max found you entertaining in the video call!” You chuckle with heat on your cheeks as you dipped your head in Billy’s chest, trying to cover your face. You didn’t intend on presenting yourself to Max, but he was on a video call when you arrived at his place yesterday, and you didn’t know because he had opened the door so normally with the phone in his hand and greeted you with a kiss, not noticing the phone in his hand.

Of course the girl on the other side of the call almost screeched and you jumped in fear at the sudden noise.

He was talking to Max, and he introduced you two through video call, which made your heart pound loudly in your chest, because the feelings for Billy escalated in ways you didn’t think they would. But it wasn’t just you, Billy had been smitten by you the moment you rejected him the first time ever a month ago at your office. He was never one for formal relationships, exclusive ones maybe once or twice which didn’t work out in the end.

But there was something about you that he couldn’t quite let go of, he almost seemed obsessed. He was afraid of being that clingy to you, but after date number eleven he gave up on the feeling and made himself exclusive to you, even if you didn’t know it. He didn’t want to be with anyone else but you, and it had scared him, it still does, but it was the first time he felt as if someone understood him.

When you had asked him a week ago if he slept with other girls, he had told you that he didn’t. That he hasn’t slept with anyone but you because he simply couldn’t. Your heart melted at his words, and how could you not believe him? If you two didn’t see each other, it was on video call or messaging, or at work. There wasn’t a single time where Billy didn’t answer you for more than one hour.

You know it’s excessive, and it’s too much, and maybe you are making a fantasy in your head, but you truly did end up liking Billy. He told you about his past, about his father and how he abused him physically and mentally, which he had to go to therapy for. He told you about his mother, her ashes being thrown in the Californian beach where she always took him surfing.

His favorite color is Red. His music taste is rock. His favorite movie is Terminator. His comfort movie, funny enough, is Shrek 2. His favorite food is Fettuccine Alfredo. His favorite dessert is dark chocolate. His favorite band is Scorpions. His favorite song is ‘You give love a bad name’ by Bon Jovi.

And as you knew these little facts about himself, he knew little facts about you, which he always remembered, and always made it known that he remembered. He got you Pínk roses once, your favorite flowers. He got you some strawberries and whipped cream, your favorite dessert. He got you a mascara from Dior because you had told him once you were running out of it.

All those small things, details, doings, made you fall for him. It wasn’t just because it was physical, and you knew that falling for a Model wasn’t the brightest of ideas, but it was impossible not to. You weren’t public yet, and you really didn’t mind that, and it’s not like you two are anything, because he never really asked.

But today, right now, when you’re laying on his chest with the bedsheets over your naked bodies while he is propped up on some pillows against the headboard, laughing because of the situation from yesterday with Max, something felt right, like a puzzle coming together.

“Hey Sweets… I gotta ask you something.” He suddenly says and you look up with a playful smile on your face.

“Oh, danger.” You replied and he chuckled, but you noticed that behind his laughter there was a glint of nervousness, which made your teasing evaporate, replaced by worry.

“It’s not bad… It’s just– I really like you. I never felt this for someone else, and I have never been in a relationship before, so I don’t know how it really works– I mean, I did have relationships before, it’s just, they never worked out, or I didn’t like the person or I just didn’t connect with them…” He was rambling, but a smile was forming on your lips, and you bit the inside of your bottom lip to forbid it from going wider.

“And what are you trying to say here, Mr. Hargrove?” You ask him, in a low voice, your eyes already looking up at him with adoration in them, heart beating fast in your chest as he looked down at you, with a smile on his lips, shaking his head slightly.

“You know what being called Mr. Hargrove does to me.” He says before pulling you on top of him with a grunt and you squeal from the movement, still giggling as you look up at him. He brushed some hair off your face, putting it behind your ear. “I want you to be mine. I want us to properly date Sweets.”

You could feel his heart hammering in his chest and yours was at his same pace. Your smile had dropped but because of the surprise, not because you weren’t happy. You were exhilarated, wanting to jump from excitement and yell it to the whole world that you are dating him, that he is yours and you were his… But–

“You’re famous, I’m… I’m nothing. What will the people that follow you say?” He shakes his head, his arms around you to keep you on top of him, not letting you go. He wasn’t going to take no for an answer, he wasn’t going to miss this chance when he finally found someone he could be himself with, or was beginning to.

“I will fight every single one that goes after you. Whatever they say it’s because they don’t know you like I do… Sweets, I want you to meet my sister properly, my friends… I mean, I talk about you enough already, and they’re getting impatient to meet you.” He chuckles and your eyes widened at his confession, heat spreading on your cheeks as you looked down at him.

“You talk about me?”

“Almost every single day.”

Oh your heart melted at that. Your brain short circuited. It’s been too long since you felt this kind of desire towards you, this want to have a future with you, and you almost teared up at his words. You had shut yourself for a whole year, began dating random dudes, and somehow you landed on Billy, who you thought was going to be a simple hook up, but he ended up being so much more than that.

You are afraid. Terrified actually. You don’t know if your ideals stand in the same place as his, but you won’t know unless you take the leap, and follow your feelings in this very second. You leaned down and pressed your lips against his softly, and the both of you closed your eyes to enjoy the tender kiss. After a few seconds you pulled away with a smile on your face.

“Okay…” His eyes widened in surprise, a wide grin spreading in his lips, teeth showing and all.

“I can call you my girlfriend now?” Your cheeks flush again at the name, feeling like a teenage girl all over again as you nod and he immediately turns you both completely, another squeal coming out of your lips as he lays you down on the other side of the bed, bouncing from the sudden force as he kisses you on the lips, still smiling as he does so.

You really cannot wait to tell everyone today at Nancy’s party.

You parked your car a block away from Nancy’s apartment building, which was actually huge, walking quickly with her gift bag in one hand. You bought her a nice pink blouse that she was groaning about not having for a while now.

You saw the lobby door almost closing, rushing towards it to get through, walking inside and then past the couches to catch onto an elevator. The doors were almost shutting so you dipped your arm in between the doors with a ‘sorry’ and stepped in, only for your mood to drop in a second as you saw who was in the small space with you.

“Jeez, you could have gotten the next one Peach.” That horrible voice says to you with venom behind his words. Of all the people you had to share an elevator with, Munson was certainly not at the top of the list.

“I am already late, and so are you.” You say and press on Nancy’s floor, which was the 7th. He rolled his eyes as you stood next to him, holding the bag in front of you as the elevator bounced slightly and started moving. Your heart was hammering with pure hatred, just standing next to this man was getting your hairs to stand, like a cat that is about to defend itself.

“Please tell me you’re joking.” He suddenly says and you frown, completely confused and looked up at him, but you found him looking at your bag. You looked down on it, and backed up at him.

“What’s wrong with my gift?” He shoots a glare your way, pulling the same bag, from the same store from his side. Your breath got stuck in your throat as dread from possibly getting the same thing settles in. “Is it a–”

“Pink Blouse.”

You both groaned loudly, anger filling your chest from him getting the same thing for Nancy. At least there’s a ticket that she can use to exchange it for something else, but now your gift is not unique anymore, you made sure, talking with everyone about what they will gift Nancy, just so your gift wouldn’t match with anyone else’s… Except.

“This is what I get for not wanting to talk to you?” You say on the low, almost mumbling to yourself, but he heard it, loud and clear, a smug grin appearing on his lips.

“Oh, are you regretting not getting on my good side now?” He says and you make a face of disgust, looking up at him, shaking your head.

“The last thing I want is that, I mean you probably don’t even have one.” He chuckles at that response to hide how irritating you were to him. He wanted out of the elevator, he couldn’t handle standing next to you when all he could feel was just how happy you were. You were almost excited from what he could guess from your features, but he didn’t know why.

“I do, you’re just not special enough to see it, Peach.” He replies with venom in his tone, surprising you from how that hit your dignity a bit. You know you aren’t special to him, just to him, and that’s fine. Still, it fucking hurt.

“Okay, now that’s–” Suddenly the Elevator bounced aggressively, signaling a stop, but the lights went out, turning the emergency ones on. They weren’t as bright, but it was something. Your eyes widened, looking at the digital number that should appear at the top of the elevator, but it was black.

“You have to be fucking kidding me!” Eddie yells, pressing desperately onto the ‘open doors’ button repeatedly and then the help button.

You cannot believe this. Someone from a higher power really hated you. It despised you, because there is no way, no possible way that you are now stuck in an elevator with Eddie Munson. You took your phone out, seeing one bar of signal, calling Nancy immediately as the nerves in your body started taking over. You aren’t claustrophobic, but staying inside four walls with your sworn enemy was not your idea for a party.

“Hey–” You didn’t even let her finish her words.

“Nance we’re stuck in the elevator!” You say to her, as quickly as you can because you don’t know if the signal will stay on for too long.

“We?”

“Munson and I.” You say with spite which Eddie noticed, rolling his eyes how disgusted you sounded saying his surname. He was still pressing onto the open doors button, hoping that it’ll make the energy return or something.

“No…. Power… Called–” And the line cut off. You groaned loudly, stomping your foot in anger as you looked at your phone to now see there was no signal.

“What did she say?” Eddie asks, still looking at the elevator console and you glared at him and then his hand, pressing the buttons nonstop.

“Power outage, so you can fucking cut that out.” He stops, only to turn his head to glare at you. You almost never fully insulted him, but when you did, his anger boiled. You were spoiled, a brat, a liar, a bad friend. Friends do not keep secrets to each other, and you are filled with them.

“Come on Peach, insult me more. Turns me on.” He replies and you fake smile at him, flipping him off before sitting down on the floor of the elevator. You grabbed your bag and you took a hard candy out, a honey one. You always chew on something when you are nervous, and being in this closed space with someone you despise was not helping the knot in your belly.

He sighed heavily, the anger swirling in his chest as he looked down at you for a second and looked back at the buttons. There wasn’t much he could do but wait now, he is not strong enough to rip the doors open, so he decides to sit in front of you, resting himself against the wall, legs spread in front of him, next to yours. All he wanted and needed was a couple of beers today. He needed the distraction from the week’s turmoil of events. Wayne’s medical bills started going up, and he had to work extra the past week to cover most of it, while saving some money for himself.

You were looking up towards the emergency light, swirling the candy around in your mouth, making some clinking sounds against your teeth every time it went from one side to the other. Eddie was glaring at you as the annoyance grew in his body, his eye twitching as you continued your movements without caring if you were being loud or nasty about it.

“Can you eat candy like a normal person?” He spats and your eyes shoot towards him, a confused frown in your face. “You’re making too much noise, cut it out.”

Oh you were now glaring back. You cannot even have a candy in peace with him, and you were debating if to spit it out, harshly, towards his forehead. For the past month, the bickering had gone down between the two of you, and that was because you spent your time with Billy more than anything, or at work.

“What, you’re going to tell me how to eat candy now? Jesus christ.” You really don’t understand what his problem is, and if you had to be stuck in this elevator with him for the next few minutes, you were sure you were going to murder him if he kept this attitude up until then. Someone would open those doors, and just find you covered in Eddie’s blood.

“It was just a comment, respect the other person that’s in the same stuck space as you.” At those words you almost choked on your candy, and you bit it down to swallow it and laugh, which Eddie knew was sarcastic, making him squint his eyes at you.

“I’m sorry, you talking about respect is funny.” You say with a smirk on your lips as you look back down at him. He was looking at you incredulously as his hands started to heat up from the rage that was slowly building up.

“Excuse me?”

“Oh come on, you and respect don’t go hand in hand. One day Munson you will admit you’re a self entitled prick that only cares about himself.” And that’s where you were wrong, but you didn’t know that, and Eddie’s blood was boiling at your words. Who do you think you are? You don’t even know him, yet you are insulting him, freely.

“You don’t even fucking know me Peach, and you’re not even worth knowing about my life.” That made something in your chest snap. For some reason, those words cut harder into you than any other insult he could ever throw at you. You didn’t notice that your eyes had teared up at the word, and Eddie simply looked at you with a mocking grin to his face. “Aw, are you going to cry? I can’t believe you actually have feelings.”

“Shut up–”

“I just don’t get it, how Robin trusts you so much, all this while. I don’t understand the rest either, but especially Robin. I mean, you really aren’t that special–” His words were pure stabs into your body, your breathing becoming heavy as he talked, and your emotions were beginning to spill over the edge of the glass. You hadn’t heard or thought of those words for a long while, and here he was, in just mere seconds reminding you about them, letting them brand into your skin again, over the scabs that built up over the last year.

“Shut the fuck up– I–”

“Oh, so you are crying now? After insulting me? Why, can’t take it like I take all of your fucking names and comments?” He all but growls. He was pissed, glaring at you with anger shown on his features. He didn’t care that there were tears running down your face, he didn’t care about your feelings, he didn’t care if this was hurting you, just like you never cared about him either.

You couldn’t take it any more, the tears falling, trying to regain your breathing, but your anger, your nerves, your despair, and your past was hunting your brain. It was making you slightly dizzy, lightheaded, and your mouth was responding for you now, no longer processing the words coming out of it. You slammed your hands on the floor of the elevator, glaring at him through a tear stained face.

“Why the FUCK do you hate me so much!? You don’t know SHIT about me, so I don’t understand why you’re like this!” You almost yell at him, your voice already getting strained by the emotions you swore you put inside that box long ago. Eddie scoffed at that, yet matched your energy as he leaned forward, pointing at you.

“Right back at you! You don’t know me! At fucking all! But the difference between you and me, Peach, is that everyone else in the group knows me, knows about me, knows about my past. And you? NO ONE knows shit about you. Not just me.” You roll your eyes at that with a scoff as your heart pounded into your chest, going wild at the process of his words.

“It’s because it’s no one's business! Can’t you fucking get that?! I am not lying about anything, I’m just keeping my past to myself! I’m harming no one!” You exclaim at him, your hands gripping onto the hard floor of the elevator and he shakes his head, giving a sarcastic laugh of his own, which made your brain snap once.

“That’s what you fucking think! You think that Robin doesn’t give a shit about that side of you, but she told you every single thing about herself, yet you act like you’re some mysterious chick that came out of nowhere just for what? Attention? For people to discuss about your past life and for you to feel fucking important?”

Your brain snapped two, three times.

“Stop–” You begged, you were begging, not being able to handle the emotions any longer, and you needed peace, you needed silence, you needed him to stop stabbing you, hurting you, making you remember.

“So who is the self entitled prick here? Huh? Look into the fucking mirror for once, and come to the actual fact that you’re an attention seeking whore–”

And then, it cracked.

“What the fuck do you want me to say!? That I’m a divorced woman that went through three fertility treatments in the lapse of three months, with a husband that was cheating on me through that?! Is that what you want to fucking hear Munson!? Is that what everyone in this fucking group wants to know or just you?!”

Silence. The small space fell into complete silence. His stretched legs next to yours, facing one another as your chest heaved up and down. He was stunned in his place, not fully processing your words because it couldn’t be. You couldn’t have gone through that, you didn’t show it… That’s when Robin’s words came into his mind: Just because she hides her past, doesn’t make her a liar.

And now, he felt the cold sweat of guilt, washing all over his body, all the way to his feet. His heart had slowed down, thanks to the shock of those words, and he was feeling like vomiting right now as the knots in his stomach appeared, trying to pry his stomach open, ripping it apart. You fell silent, slow tears still rolling down your cheeks as you rested against the wall again, and you looked up at the emergency light.

The box had opened. Everything you sealed up, everything you worked for a year to keep inside of you, inside of your head, to maybe erase it, to erase the pain, to erase the treason, to erase it all. Your mother had told you that someday you would explode. She had suggested a therapist, but you never listened, because you thought you were strong enough. That you were strong enough to deal with the pain and with the memory by yourself.

By leaving.

“I was–”

“You don’t have to…” Eddie stops you immediately. He didn’t do this for you to confess your past, or maybe he did, but he never expected this, and now he was regretting every single word that came out of his mouth throughout this whole year towards you. You glared up at him through your tears, talking to him in the coldest tone he ever heard coming from you.

“You wanted it, now you listen.” He felt fear towards you, but not because he was afraid of you, but from what you might have experienced. “Do you know… how the fertility treatment for a female Beta works?”

“So you just sign here, and he signs here, and then the treatment will start for the both of you.” Camila says with a smile to her face as she points at the contact that was on the table. You squeal in excitement while holding your husband’s hand, Henry, as he smiles at you and kisses your knuckles. You grabbed the pen and signed the contract, your husband signing afterwards.

“I can’t believe it’s happening…” You say, smiling towards Henry, your husband of three years, friend from school, boyfriend in college. Getting together with Henry felt like destiny, after the two of you were assigned on a project together at college after not seeing him for over a year.

And now, you two had signed to start the fertility treatment on the both of you to have your first child. It was something you two knew since you started dating that it would happen, and that you wanted it, you both wanted it. You looked up at Camila, your lawyer and your best friend since middle school. She had a big smile on her face, giving you a nod.

“I’m so excited to be an aunt!” She squealed and you giggled while Henry shook his head at the both of you with a chuckle of his own. You heard about the procedure of fertility treatment for females, and it has 99.7% efficiency. You also heard about the pain that it would bring, but it couldn’t be that bad, would it?

–

GET IT OUT. GET IT OUT. GET IT OUT. GET IT OUT.

Those were your only thoughts as you bit and screamed onto the towel that was given to you, while you were put in a sitting position on the procedure chair, like a Gynecologist's, and your thighs were strapped onto its supports, keeping your legs open, not letting you move away either.

The procedure consisted of a long small tube that held a very needle inside. That tube is inserted into the vaginal canal, piercing through the uterus breech until it gets to a fallopian tube. Then the needle would start poking the treatment into the organ, reactivating the fertility process on the eggs that are inside the ovaries.

But the large bendable tube, ripping through your uterus, feeling it going into your fallopian tube, without anesthesia, was too much. Too much to handle. You didn’t expect this to be this painful, because the male Betas had it easier. They had injections done on their ball sack, giving fertility to the sperm inside for a limited period of time.

The tears were running down your eyes as you clenched them tightly, feeling the sharp needle starting the process now, and you just wanted it to be over. It was going to be all worth it in the end, you will have a beautiful baby, the one thing you’ve always wanted. You always dreamt of a big family, and Henry promised you just that.

The pain might be unbearable, but if it meant you could have more kids with Henry, you would go through it again.

–

Your eyes were wide, glossed over from the incoming tears as you saw the pregnancy test in your hand. You did everything right, the procedure, the postures, the aftercares, just everything…

And it didn’t take.

It might take some time, more than a month after the treatment, but the next day after the failed test, your bedding had been stained with your blood. You almost screamed with a sob, covering your face with your hands as you looked down at your splayed legs and the blotch of blood that was in between them.

Your husband immediately shot up from his sleeping state, looking at your figure and then down at the bed. He shook his head, gulping heavily as he pulled you into an embrace, trying to soothe you down, brushing your hair softly.

“It’s okay baby… It wasn’t 100% efficient, we knew that… It’s okay, nothing’s wrong, you did nothing wrong.”

Those words filled your empty heart, accepting the fact that the treatment did not work this time.

“Next time, it’ll work…” You softly mumble against his neck and his eyes widen slightly, looking down at you.

“You want to try again?” He asks and you nod, your spirit not backing down from that family you always wanted. He nods at you and presses his lips against your head. “I’ll prepare a warm bath for you, okay?” You sniffle, looking back down at the puddle of blood on the sheets and that is probably sipping through them and onto the mattress.

It’s okay, next time it’ll take.

–

You were sobbing as you sat in Camila’s toilet, feeling the blotches of blood falling down as your best friend was trying to wipe your face with concern being drawn on her eyebrows. The four pregnancy tests were all over the sink, and then it suddenly happened, and you had to pull your pants down to see blood had started leaking down from you.

“Sweetheart, shh, don’t cry…”

“I don’t get it! I did everything right! I even rechecked myself, and I am healthy, and ready for a baby, and he did the studies on himself too and there’s nothing wrong with us!” You almost screamed as you felt more blood running down into the toilet, the sobs ripping out of your chest at the failed conception, once again.

“Maybe the third time’s the charm? Like the saying?” She was trying to put humor in the situation, but you had told her about the insufferable pain you went through. Going through that two times, the appointment being just one month after the last one, was almost traumatizing.

“I don’t know if I can handle a third… Not only because of the pain, but because of seeing that single line again, and then feeling my blood coming down… I don’t want to feel that again!” Camila grabbed your face in between her hands and she gave you a slow nod, with a warm smile on her face.

“You are so strong, I know you can do this, and Henry is waiting for it to happen… Nothing is wrong with you both, maybe the timing was wrong… This time it’ll happen.”

And those words helped you clean yourself that evening and already book another appointment. Third time’s the charm.

It has to be.

–

“Please, please, give me a break, I can’t do this again, please!” You yelled while laying on the hospital’s bed, your upper body propped up with each foot hooked into some metal pedals in each corner of the bed to keep your legs spread.

The doctor pulled away, looking up from in between your legs with pity eyes and shook her head.

“We can’t stop the process sweetheart, a pause can cause an alteration and we’re already more than halfway there! I promise!” You were processing what she was saying, with tears streaming down your cheeks, your bottom lip busted open from biting onto it way too hard to control your cries. The pain was unbearable, feeling like you were being split open, your insides being ripped apart.

But you wanted this. You both wanted this. Something is wrong with you, it has to be. There’s no other explanation for it, no matter if the doctors ran a bunch of tests on you and said everything should really be fine, you didn’t believe that. Something was not working, but you really wanted this.

So you nodded for your doctor to proceed, and the pain worsened from there.

But that day, you got out of the appointment earlier than expected because another person decided to not show up. So you decided to surprise your husband and head over to his clinic, where he was getting his appointment done at this very moment with a smile on your face, fighting against the pain that was in your uterus and in between your legs.

Parking your car in the lot, you got out with a wince to go towards the clinic’s doors, and head over to the receptionist with a smile to your face.

“Hello! I’m here because my husband is having fertility treatment?” You say with a chirp to your voice and the blonde girl at the desk smiled at you with a nod.

“Can you give me the name?”

“Henry Creel.” She nods and types something on her computer, a small frown appearing on her face as she looks up at you.

“There is no one by that name for a fertility treatment today.” You tilted your hair to the side, completely confused because you swore you heard him say it was today. Maybe you had heard wrong but there was already a storm inside your stomach, your instincts kicking in.

“O-Oh, then, is it tomorrow?” You ask and the lady had a sad frown on her face, looking at you with worry in her eyes.

“There were no fertility treatments done to a man named Henry Creel. Ever. He is not in our system…”

You were frozen in place. It couldn’t be, this was the clinic, you were sure of it. He told you that it was close to yours many times, that’s why he always picked you up after your treatment, taking care of you, buckling you into the passenger’s seat as he went home with you.

You didn’t even reply to the woman, despite her calling out to you, and you immediately darted towards your car. You needed to get home, you needed to check the contract to see if the clinic was another one, because that must be it. He signed the contract so the fertility treatment has to be done.

You raced home, stepped on the gas like never before, your head spiraling as you reached your house and the knots in your stomach appeared. Your eyes widened when you saw a very familiar car at the front of your home, so you shut your own car off a little bit further so you could go inside silently.

Your heart was pounding into your chest as your mind was telling you to not go inside your home, despite you already opening the door, and walking inside, only to be hit with the sound of moaning, groaning, breathless sighs coming from upstairs. From your room.

You started heading up, silently, thinking that this is a nightmare, that this is not real, that this was just some random people that barged into your home to have sex, because it couldn’t be real, it just couldn’t.

But when you opened the door, it all became real. Your husband looked at you, his movements stopping completely, his eyes widening at the sight of you. Then your eyes darted to the person below him, the person who was clawing her nails onto his back.

Camila.

“The contract was fake. He never went to any of his appointments, not once, and I suffered three times… Three.” Your tears never stopped, your eyes never leaving the emergency light at the top of the elevator. “They both cheered me on… Knowing how painful it was, knowing I could end up traumatized by it… while they fucked behind my back… The only two people I ever trusted, fully, in my whole life.”

Eddie was speechless, looking down at his feet with a pained frown in his eyebrows. His jaw was clenching from the anger of what you went through, of what they did to you, and because he was holding in the lump in his throat from the guilt that was brewing in his mind and his heart.

He now understood why you didn’t want to talk about your past, and it wasn’t because you were hiding, but because you wanted to start fresh. You wanted those memories gone, and he just got them out of your mouth, when you probably haven’t talked about them for the last year. He just made you spill that part of yourself that you tried so hard to conceal, and he did it in the most spiteful way.

In a way he doesn’t think he will forgive himself for.

“I–”

“Now do you understand why I don’t trust easily? Or are you still going to act like a self-entitled prick?” Eddie’s eyes shot up to see you no longer glaring at him, but with a much more pained look on your face. He was the last person you wanted to know about your past, about your pain, about your memories, and he got them out of you inside a stuck elevator.

Silence filled the air again as you both looked at eachother. Pained nothingness in your eyes while Eddie’s was filled with pained guilt. He clenched his jaw again, swallowing the lump in his throat as he tried to clear it up a bit to try to talk again.

“I-I know this… won’t do–” He cut himself to bite his top lip and looked away from you but you could catch his eyes turning glossy, making you listen to him closely. “I’m sorry… for everything.”

You stared at him, for a long while. You were angry, pissed, enraged by the fact that the man in front of you tormented you for a whole year and even got your past out of your mouth, yet… There was a sense of relief now. Not with him, but within yourself. As if you had held your breath for too long and you could finally sigh it out.

“I don’t accept it.” You reply to him and he simply nods, still looking away from you. You looked down at your hands, feeling slightly defeated by him. You couldn’t help but feel weak now, feel completely vulnerable after giving him your story, which he probably will tell Robin about. Will she hate you for hiding it from her? Will everyone else think you are some poor girl that needs saving?

A shadow casted over you, making you frown slightly, turning your head up to see that Eddie had moved, now kneeling in front of you, looking at you with eyes that now could see you for who you were.

Strong.

“Finish it.”

“What?” You were baffled by his sudden words, frowning up at him.

“Finish what you intended that night. The night you tackled me.” Your eyes widened at that request, shaking your head slightly, looking at him as if he had gone crazy.

“What are you saying?”

“I deserve it and more. Finish what you intended that night.” He was opening himself up for you to take your anger out on him. You felt your whole body heat up, a burning sensation going towards your fingertips, and your chest flushing with the wave of anger exploding inside of it. You immediately kneeled in front of him and sent your right hand flying against his left cheek.

His head swung to the side, stinging him from the blow, but he couldn’t be mad. In fact, he knew he deserved it, and he deserved it that night. He now understands how hard it must have been for you to go on all those dates after what you went through. He now understands how hard it was for you to open up your heart again. He now understands that despite it all, you do tell Robin stuff, pouring yourself out to her.

He now understands. He now respects you, completely, entirely.

Your tears ran down your cheeks as you took a deep breath in and swung your other hand towards his right cheek, making his head swing to the other side now. Your hands were burning and stinging from the blows, but it had helped. It helped so much because Eddie Munson didn’t look like someone who would let himself be hit or be disrespected without consequences, yet he was giving himself out to you for you to hurt him.

To make him feel, how you felt whenever he said the word Worth.

Because that’s how you felt when it happened. Were you that worthless that they didn’t care about you? Were you not worthy enough to find love? Were you not worthy enough to find a family? Were you that worthless?

You were about to hit him again when realization hit you, your hand stopping mid air. But Robin… She loved you unconditionally, opened her arms for you despite you building walls around you. Jonathan had cared for you, even after rejecting him, and became a friend without any awkwardness between you two. Steve, Nancy and Argyle, they never once questioned you, never once left you aside or made you feel unwelcome.

They do that, despite your walls.

Do you deserve that?

Eddie was looking at your expression, your eyes darting back and forth as thoughts processed in your head. He could feel your uneasiness, your sadness, your pain, your uncertainty, but there was one thing he could see in yourself right now, and he wasn’t going to let you think about it, not for a single second.

“You’re not worthless.”

Your eyes widened and your head shot up to ask him how he could read your mind but then you were both thrown to the ground as the elevator started moving again, abruptly, shaking itself as it went up. Your hands had to grip his biceps for support and he had his own arms on your waist, pulling the both of you up from the ground. He held you until you could stabilize yourself and then pulled away from you. He clenched and unclenched his fists without much thought as he looked at you.

“You okay?” He asked and you looked up at him, seeing his reddened face because of your slaps and you couldn’t help but let out a laugh at the sight. He blinked as if you were insane and kept his eyes on you.

“I-I’m sorry, I just don’t know how we will explain our state to everyone else.” You say, knowing your makeup was running down your face, your nose was stuffed, your eyes were red from crying… He chuckles with you as the elevator dings that you both got into Nancy’s floor. He grabbed the bags, the same present, but from different people, and he handed one to you.

“We’ll think of something, Peach.”

As you stepped out of the elevator, you know something shifted at that step. It was as if you left something inside there, someone else, and it was time for it to go. Something has definitely changed, inside of you, and probably with the way you are with everyone else. And that’s when you came to a decision, because if you didn’t move on now, you never will.

Next thing tomorrow, you’ll tell Robin everything.

End of chapter 10

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A/N: As I mentioned, THIS STORY IS A NON TRADITIONAL OMEGAVERSE, most of the lore is created in my own head.

Taglist: @enam3l @katethetank @seatnights @oliskitten @bebe07011 @seventhlevelofhell @babez-a-licious @arsenicred @bl4ckt00thgr1n @harrysgothicbitch @emma77645 @fictionalcomforts @hellv1ra @sarcastically-defensive17 @lodeddiperrodrick @corrodedcoffincumslut @peea90 @sidthedollface2 @elegantkoalapaper @ghost-proofbaby @take-everything-you-can @lalisas2 @luciferiorbxtch

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cure-orchid · 4 months

Text

So I know the show recently ended, but I ended up binging through TGAMM and loved it! The Ghost Friends are all mood and the Mollie ship is adorable. Then I learned about the Chairman Ollie arc for the scrapped third season and IT WOULD HAVE BEEN SO COOL TO SEE!

I ended up writing down how I would imagine the story arc going down, and I headcanon that several of the planned season 3 eps (minus the ones that would clash with the finale) happened between JVTHM and The End (Ollie knowing about the wraith memory loss and how he says it could have hinted that it already occurred.)

My Chairman Ollie plotline: It starts with what was outlined in the already written scripts, and Ollie keeps spending more and more time in the Ghost World rather than on Earth. He’s becoming a little more forgetful as the episodes pass and has noticeable headaches. Things like his parents having a Root Beer Bar or the plot of the latest Country Pumpkin movie seem to surprise him when he should already know about them.

He’s missed a few dates with Molly and slipping on schoolwork so she takes an episode trying to talk to him at school but he keeps getting pulled away to fix something as the Chairman. The episode would really drive in how his human memories are failing even when he reconnects with his body and there’s a whole musical number on how Molly feels he’s growing distant. She finally catches up to him in the end and he looks partway between normal and being an empty shell(his hair is even losing the swoop!). She asks him out for ice cream but then we get a wham line “Sure, but… who are you?” Molly’s heart literally breaks as she discovers Ollie has lost all memory of her. He excuses himself and leaves Molly crying with Scratch and Libby coming to console her.

Next episode the remaining Ghost Friends are trying to figure out what’s wrong with him when June comes to Molly’s house trying not to panic. Ollie’s shell came home yesterday but not his wraith and he’s still not back. Molly, Libby and Darryl go to the Chen’s while Scratch goes to the Ghost World to see what’s keeping him. He finds Ollie still obsessively trying to engoodify the Ghost World and his orange glow is much more faded. Worse, when Scratch calls him by his name he asks who Ollie is. Libby manages to discover a page in her pop-up book that was stuck to another and reveals wraiths can lose their memories the longer they spend away from their body and without the will to live they cannot fully rejoin the two halves. Scratch arrives and with all they know they make a plan. Molly, Scratch and the Chen’s go to the Ghost World while Darryl and Libby keep an eye on their bodies. They get to Ollie and he doesn’t recognize anyone but Scratch, but has no emotional attachment to him. Big musical number as they all try to help Ollie remember but it doesn’t work. Everyone is devastated and it seems like Ollie might be gone forever.

Molly doesn’t give up, she pulls down his hood and cups his face, (this is where the drawing is) telling Ollie that she loves him and gives him their first kiss. Her yellow sparks course through him and his orange glow regains it’s color… and he regains his memories. When they pull away, Olly says her name and he’s pulled into a group hug as he says everyone’s names. He leaves the robe and hurries back into his body. A few hours later it’s just him, Molly and Scratch when the ghost council arrives. I haven’t come up with what happens to the robe but Ollie does relinquish his title as chairman and Scratch pulls the council away. Now alone, Ollie didn’t get to say it back in the ghost world, but he loves Molly too. They have another kiss and lean their foreheads together afterwards… and then Scratch comes back complaining that they already sucked faces once today already.

Here’s the thing, I won’t be personally writing this into a fanfic myself, mainly because I’ve already used the ‘true loves kiss restores boyfriends memories’ for another fic and I don’t wanna repeat myself but that is exactly how I imagine the Chairman Ollie arc concluding. I am still sharing the plot I came up with and anyone is free to use it as long as they let me know so I can read it.

Also bonus doodles:

#the ghost and molly mcgee #tgamm #mollie #molliver #Molly McGee #ollie chen #scratch mcgee #I can’t believe I cried harder at this finale than I did at The Owl House or SVTFOE #my art

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markantonys · 5 months

Note

You saw the leak huh? Mat might go to Tanchico instead of the Waste in s3

i hadn't seen it until i got this ask! i looked it up and here's the source: WoTUp video. usual disclaimer that these are leaks so may not be 100% reliable, although i thiiiiink WoTUp has a pretty good track record for accurate leaks. UPDATE: they actually have a spotty track record with leaks and have reported false ones before (such as that faile would be in s2), so we should definitely be taking this one with a grain of salt!

to summarize the video, the only new piece of info is that mat, thom, and min were (allegedly) spotted filming scenes with elayne and nynaeve for the tanchico storyline. (he also says that elayne, nynaeve, liandrin, ispan, and moghedien were spotted filming for that storyline, which is of course not surprising!) HOWEVER, he says that he has no idea where in the season these scenes fall or whether it means mat is *exclusively* part of the tanchico storyline in s3, so at this point we can't say mat is 100% spending the entire season in tanchico instead of the waste - there's still a chance that he's in the waste for a portion and tanchico for another portion.

now, time to speculate! full book series spoilers below. this will be long because my mind is going a mile an hour!

fact #1: mat's hanging and missing eye were foreshadowed multiple times in season 2

fact #2: in this podcast interview, donal referred to mat's season 2 knifestick as a "makeshift ashandarei" (it could be he was just speaking with book knowledge about what a real ashandarei is, but to me it implies that show!mat will also be getting a real ashandarei. besides, the greatest general of the age inarguably needs a better permanent weapon than a knifestick!)

these facts make me still very confident that we will be getting at least 1 Mat Doorway Trip in the show. but that doesn't necessarily guarantee he'll go to the waste - it could happen anywhere. rhuidean is the book version, but falme has a "room of curiosities" per season 2, and tanchico has a museum thingy per the books, so there are several options for where mat could come across a doorway.

unless they're changing the doorway aspect of the moiraine vs. lanfear showdown (which i don't have any reason to believe they will, especially given mat's missing eye foreshadowing, which indicates moiraine will still get trapped in the finn realm and mat will rescue her), then there needs to be a doorway in whatever location the two of them find themselves in at the end of season 3 (or at least that's my best guess for when the showdown will take place). and i doubt moiraine would get over to tanchico, or that she would've carted a doorway from falme to the waste, so a rhuidean doorway for that plotline still feels the most plausible for me. however, there could be multiple doorways in the show, as there are in the books, so mat could go through a different one. so this entire point actually may be moot then, i guess haha but i will keep it in here nonetheless!

here are the overall options i can think of right now - note that i'm assuming only 1 Mat Doorway Trip for now to keep things simpler, but it's not impossible that he might still have 2 trips like he does in the books.

#1: mat goes through a doorway in falme at the beginning of the season (and gets cpr from rand, who went to the doorway to get his own answers)

-> #1A: mat is told by Falme Finn to go to the waste and does so, but partway through the season he heads over to tanchico (perhaps to fetch elayne at rand's behest because of rumors of trouble in caemlyn)

-> #1B: mat is told by Falme Finn to go to tanchico, and he never goes to the waste at all

#2: mat initially accompanies the tanchico crew of his own volition and goes through a doorway there (and gets cpr from someone who is not rand), and he never goes to the waste at all

#3: mat initially accompanies the tanchico crew of his own volition and goes through a doorway there, but he gets spit out of it in rhuidean (and gets cpr from rand, who has conveniently just emerged from his glass columns trip)

#4: mat initially accompanies the waste crew of his own volition and goes through a doorway in rhuidean, but he gets spit out of it in tanchico (and gets cpr from someone who is not rand)

i will be more crushed than you could ever comprehend if Cauthor CPR doesn't make it into the show in SOME way haha but i will start girding my loins now for the possibility (although i do still think it could happen). and no matter what happens, at least we'll always have Cauthor Homoerotic Stabbing Feat. Extended Cradling!

in all honesty, mat doesn't really Do that much in the waste plotline aside from his doorway trip. i would be incredibly sad to lose out on bonding time with rand and egwene (yet thrilled to get mat-elayne-nynaeve bonding - when god closes a door, he opens a window!), but in terms of mat's overall long-term story arc, there isn't anything for him in the waste arc that MUST take place in the waste, i don't think?

but on the other hand, if they're going to add him into the tanchico storyline, they have to have a good reason for it - it can't just be for the sake of having fun shenanigans and bonding with elayne and nynaeve. so of course, my immediate supposition is that this would be absorbing the ebou dar plotline and thus that the ultimate purpose of mat going to tanchico would be to meet tuon.

and honestly................that's a REALLY good idea! i've said a million times over that tuon and her relationship with mat need to be introduced much earlier in the show than they are in the books in order to have enough time for proper development, so combining the wondergirls' two different trips to seanchan-infiltrated west-coast cities into one trip and thereby having mat meet tuon by the end of season 3? that could be a very clever adaptational choice. we know so so little about season 3 so far that i really don't want to get myself stuck into any assumptions THIS soon haha so i'm going to try not to get to hung up on this idea, but i do feel pretty strongly that the best reason (and perhaps the ONLY good reason?) to add mat into the tanchico storyline is if they want to combine it with ebou dar and use it as tuon's introduction. and this would also work very well with mat's doorway trip, because he'd be getting his marriage prophecy in the same season as he meets tuon (though he and/or the audience may or may not not become aware of it until a future season).

but what would a season 3 mat-tuon meeting mean for future seasons? maybe they would just cross paths this season, then go their separate ways for some individual arcs and cross paths again later for the romance to begin. or maybe tuon would get caught up in mat's plotline for season 4 and potentially beyond.

(i do worry that making mat & tuon meet THIS soon could mean they believe they need to aim for the 5-season model instead of the full 8 because i'm not sure what tuon would do for 5 more seasons after this, but i'm already so far out on the limb of speculation here that i don't want to go any further until we know more! and they could certainly invent plenty of stuff for tuon to do seeing as she did not do SHIT in the books and desperately needs to lmao the seanchan heir being a channeler is something that is huuuuuuugely rife with story potential.)

going back to mat, let's think a little about HIS future storylines, in the scenario of him meeting tuon by the end of s3. i think the only other major pre-ebou-dar thing he needs to do is form the band of the red hand, which could be shuffled around to after meeting tuon instead of before. there's lots of possibilites for it - all mat needs to do is participate in a battle where a lot of other people are also fighting. maybe the seanchan try to invade tanchico, and he rallies the locals to protect the city. maybe in season 4 he carts tuon along with him back into rand's plotline, where he forms the band during one of the many City-Conquering Rand Battles the show has available to choose from (cairhien, tear, illian, caemlyn). i do feel hopeful that even IF tanchico stands in for ebou dar, it won't be the point of mat splitting off from rand & the main gang for the entire rest of the series never to return like ebou dar was in the books. especially because he barely does anything of story significance between ebou dar & moiraine rescue heist, so it wouldn't be hard to just move up the schedule of his & tuon's meeting and then return him to his TFOH/LOC storyline.

(............which again makes me worry they're aiming for 5 seasons total because what would MAT do for 4 more seasons if everything but the moiraine rescue heist is accomplished by the end of s4? but, again, don't want to go too far out on the limb of speculation. and 8 seasons has always been a very very lofty goal in today's era of television, so getting 5 would still be wonderful! and so much of books 7-13 is filler & sidequests that i think they could absolutely tell the most important parts of the story satisfyingly in only 5 seasons.)

@butterflydm and i have also speculated that elayne & nynaeve could potentially reunite with the waste crew by the end of s3 or early in s4, in order to give them some bonding time with those characters (particularly rand & aviendha and lan, respectively). so, if mat is in tanchico with them, maybe he could come along! maybe rather than getting split up in a seanchan attack, mat and the girls all kidnap tuon and flee the city together, and make their way back to the rest of the gang.

and finally, on a different note, min's presence in tanchico. intriguing! my first thought was that maybe liandrin kidnaps her from cairhien because she finds out min knows she's in cahoots with ishamael and doesn't want min to snitch, and that's how min ends up in tanchico. this would prooooobably mean she skips the tower coup plotline entirely, which i think is okay because siuan, elaida, gawyn, leane, and possibly logain would probably be enough to anchor that plotline for us. it would also give min the bonding time with elayne & nynaeve she didn't have time for in season 2, and if my tuon speculations are correct, then potentially min would enter her orbit this early as well, which would be interesting. rescuing siuan in the coup is The Only Thing min does in 14 books so it would be funny if the show cut it djkfjg but they can (and already have) invent new stuff for her to do instead, and honestly, min doesn't really fit in with the coup & salidar plotlines that well anyway since she isn't a stakeholder in anything relating to the white tower - none of that stuff truly MATTERS to her character, she just happens to be present for it. so IF she doesn't end up being in that plotline in the show, not a huge loss imo (though of course, she could still make her way to the tower later on, or maybe she starts in the tower but then siuan sends her to tanchico to investigate liandrin or something).

anyway, i think i've reached the end of my speculation for now, although i'm sure i'll think of more stuff later! in conclusion, this is my current mood:

#anonymous #answered #wot book spoilers #wot show spoilers

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gardens-dogs-starwars · 30 days

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To everyone worried about how they will wrap up all the plotlines in one (hopefully) hour-long episode-they won't.

We're getting a Clone Rebellion show. It's almost a certainty now. That's why Echo is getting so much focus (and a hand! new armor maybe??) So questions about Cody and Wolffe will likely be handled in that. And maybe Hemlock won't die in this and will continue to act as an antagonist?? I wish he'd be eaten by the Zillo Beast tbh but this could also be interesting...

This show is specifically about the Batch, so getting Omega out and finishing their arc will be the priority, and I do actually think we have time for that. And I do think the Batch will make it out alive and that Tech will be alive. Very likely not unharmed and for sure brainwashed whether he's CX-2 or in one of the other tanks but I do think they will reveal him at a crucial moment. I think it could also be an interesting way to continue the Batch's story into the Clone Rebellion-have Tech be CX-2 and they don't manage to save him, but they won't repeat the same mistake they made with Crosshair, they're going to get him out no matter what??

Honestly though, I have no idea what's going to happen in the finale. Just going to sit back and enjoy the ride, since there's still a chance I'm wrong and this could be the last we see of these characters which would completely destroy my sanity...🙃

#i am still on the delulu train #big surprise there #the bad batch #the bad batch s3 spoilers #the bad batch season 3 spoilers #tbb s3 spoilers #tbb season 3 spoilers

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raspberryfingers · 1 year

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A Lion in the Garden -Tywin Lannister x Reader- (Part 30)

WARNING: NSFW/Mentions of sex

A/N: AHH alright, so I'm kind of losing it. It's genuinely hard to believe that A Lion in the Garden is over, or at least plot wise anyways. Because yes, I am going to go back and edit, along with adding new chapters into the main plotline to help with pacing and all that, but this is the end of Lady Tyrell and Tywin’s story and it is honestly making me emotional. I started this story in late November, and in the last six months I’ve written about 170,000 words about these two, which is around 300 pages the way that I have it formatted in google docs. So, needless to say, this has been quite the journey for me and also for all of you who have been reading as I publish. And a giant thank you to everyone who’s shown support for my story, because even when I was busy or lacking motivation, knowing that there were at least a few people desperate for the next chapter made me keep working, and now I’m here. Anyways, with all that said, please enjoy the last chapter and know that I am so grateful for all my readers <3

—————

To finally be in the tower of the hand was a blessing. I had spent no less than three hours in the great hall, and if I’d been stuck there any longer I might’ve gone mad. Thankfully, Tywin knew me well enough to know that my patience was wearing thin, and had distracted a few lords so I could slip away.

It was about 10:00 when I made it back to our chambers, and instantly I collapsed on one of the sofas in Tywin’s bedroom, removing my shoes with a sigh. I massaged my feet and ankles, tired after quite literally standing still for hours on end. If I had been walking the whole time it would’ve been fine, but it was like I had been stuck.

“King Tywin Lannister…” I muttered to myself, getting up from the sofa and going over to the mirror. I could’ve rang for Cerella, but it was late, and the last thing I wanted was to be rude. In all honesty, I wasn’t sure I could tolerate a conversation right now. All I wanted was to let my hair down, remove my gown, and fall asleep.

No, that wasn’t all I wanted. I wanted Tywin beside me too.

But he probably wouldn’t have the chance to join me until much later, and I couldn’t wait for him. Sighing, I grabbed at the pins in my hair, taking them out and running my fingers through it afterwards. It had not relieved my headache as much as I had hoped.

I reached backward then, watching myself in the mirror as I undid my dress. I suddenly wished that Tywin had dressed me in red this morning, for at least I could’ve felt connected to him that way. The entire day—though not purposefully, of course—he had been so distant, and now all I wanted was to feel like he was with me.

My dress fell to the floor, and I undid the rest of my unnecessary undergarments with a sigh of relief. I turned to go towards the dresser and find a nightgown, but I noticed that one had already been laid out on a chair. I was unable to hold back a smile, grabbing my gown and other undergarments from the floor and folding them as neatly as I could. Cerella had known me well enough to understand that I wouldn’t want to speak to anybody at this hour, and so she had set out my nightgown in advance. Gods, I loved her.

I set my clothes down on the chair, taking the nightgown in my hands once I had and slipping into it. I found that I dearly missed the warm nights that Tywin and I had spent nude, lazily sprawled out under the thin silk sheets. The nights had become colder, and soon the days would too. After that, it would only be a matter of time before the ravens came from the citadel. Then the blankets and furs on our bed would pile, and I would press myself closer against him. Perhaps that was not so unfortunate.

I slipped into bed, pulling the blanket up to the bottom of my neck and finding a comfortable position. I settled into the mattress with a sigh, my head sinking into the pillow with a sort of relief. It was odd, however, to be falling asleep without Tywin by my side. The bed felt too light without him, and I wondered if I would be able to sleep without the sound of his breathing beside me.

King Tywin Lannister.

Everytime I found myself drifting off, that came back to me. It was still such a shocking concept, and I wanted it to feel normal more than anything. For some reason, though, I simply couldn’t make it sound correct. Queen (Y/N) Tyrell.

A small shiver went up my back, and I had to turn onto my other side in bed. I kept hoping for the sound of Tywin’s boots outside the door, but they would not come. It was almost funny to me, how much comfort was derived from a man that plenty of people considered an insufferable cunt. Myself included, let it be known.

And yet still, I felt restless without him. I had a million questions to ask, and a million reassurances I wished to receive. Although, I guessed he was worse off than I was, probably surrounded by far too many noblemen… and noblewomen.

Now I was lying on my back, a sort of jealousy sparking in me and making my body go hot. Never before had I ever felt that somebody would try and disrupt my relationship with Tywin, but if he was to be king, surely the title of queen looked appealing to many ladies. Just as I was certain the concept of birthing little princes and princesses did.

Would Tywin want children now? His relationship with Tyrion had improved, yes, but would he go so far as to put him on the throne? I wondered if that was better or worse than Casterly Rock. But that was only for a moment, because the idea of heirs was most important. I knew for certain that the titles of prince and princess had not changed my feelings, but sometimes Tywin was hard to predict. Although, if I hadn’t been so tired and my head not so clouded, I would’ve known instantly that his opinion upon the subject had not changed.

Eventually, this train of thought became so tiring that it no longer made sense, and the words in my head were not coherent any longer, especially as I had turned back onto my side and closed my eyes once more. My breathing had begun to slow as well, and slowly but surely I drifted off.

In my dreams, I was on the battlefield. I somehow knew that Tywin was there, but I did not see him. The other odd thing was that it had been snowing, and it was somewhat reminiscent of Winterfell. It was unlike any battle I'd ever been in.

—————

Tywin was utterly exhausted. He had been in constant discussion ever since you’d left the hall, and it was now approaching 2:00 in the morning. He was making his way up the tower of the hand, already grasping at the top of his coat and undoing the clips. It was unlike him to undress anywhere besides his chambers, but gods he couldn’t help it.

All he wanted was to slip into bed beside your warm body and hold you close, because just as you needed his support, he needed yours. He was not an overly emotional person, but he could admit that to feel you in his arms would relieve the unbearable amount of stress he had accumulated in the last 24 hours. He had single handedly made House Lannister the most powerful and placed them on the throne; it was truly a wonder.

Tywin did not bother looking at the guards outside his door when he entered his office, he only pushed the door open with a slight sigh and carefully shut it behind him. It wouldn’t have been enough to wake you up regardless, but it was so quiet that he did not want to disturb the silence.

He fully shrugged off his coat now, draping it over his arm as he went towards the bedroom door. That one was handled carefully too, opened and closed as softly as was possible. There were a few dim candles lit, but overall the room was quite dark. He could see you, though, lying in bed with your face turned toward the door.

The candles were behind you for the most part, and it gave your figure a pleasant outline. Although, your face was partly buried in the pillow, and an odd feeling of guilt ran through Tywin. Had you been crying?

He took light steps across the room, placing his coat down on the same chair that you had left your gown. He sat down in another, reaching down to pull off his boots with a soft groan. Once he had done that, he untucked his shirt from his pants and then continued to strip. Tywin found his black robe in the dresser and promptly slipped it over his head, periodically looking over to make sure you were still asleep.

Entirely ready to sleep now, he approached your side of the bed. He lifted his hand to your face, the back of his fingers brushing against your cheek. It did not feel as though you had been crying, but it was impossible to tell. He felt the pillowcase too, and was reassured by the dryness there. No, you had not been crying.

Quietly, Tywin made his way around the bed until he reached his side, carefully lifting the blankets and getting in with as little disruption as was possible. You seemed relatively undisturbed by the shifting of the mattress, and he knew he had not woken you. Tywin laid on his back with a quiet sigh, feeling utterly relieved to finally be in bed and alone. It felt like being alone, at least, for your company was never disruptive to him.

He had been drifting to sleep, but was suddenly startled by a jolting beside him. When Tywin opened his eyes, he saw you shake beside him. He moved to reach over and hold you, but you had shot straight up with a gasp, and he could see a sort of fear in your eyes.

“(Y/N)? Are you alright?” He asked, having to clear his throat as he sat up and placed his hands on your arms. You looked over at him—as if processing that he was there—and then nodded. Something had clearly started you. “A bad dream?” he questioned, gently cupping your cheek and bringing your forehead to his lips.

“Yes, y-yes. It was just a bad dream,” you whispered in reply, swallowing. The way you said it gave the odd impression that you were trying to remind yourself of it, not that you were telling Tywin. He gave you a sympathetic look, though you did not notice.

“Come, sweet girl. Let us sleep,” Tywin whispered, slowly coaxing you back down to the mattress. He sighed out airily when you moved closer to him, wrapping your arms around his torso. He could feel your stress and uncertainty being relieved as you held him, and he could not keep himself from holding you with the same ferocity.

Tywin clutched at you, wrapping his arms entirely around you and pressing you to his body as much as was physically possible. He knew he wouldn’t, but there was an odd desire in him to sob. He did not want to be the king, all he wanted was to remain here with you.

“Oh Tywin…” you muttered, inhaling his scent with an overwhelming sense of comfort. Your own scent was simultaneously giving him the same feeling. You had begun to nuzzle into him, too, much as a lion would. In response, his hand had come to your hair, cupping your head as one does for an infant. It had come from some sort of protective instinct, and even knowing that there was nothing to fear, Tywin would not let go.

His queen.

With both of you feeling utterly at peace in each other's arms, it did not take long to fall asleep. You had drifted off first, and the sound of your tired breathing had sent Tywin to sleep right after you. He had been so glad to hold you, and perhaps even a bit happy that you were tired and disoriented, for you had asked no questions. Those would come in the morning, he knew.

Tywin would happily answer them then, but for now, all he wanted was sleep. And with you wrapped up in his arms, that was no strenuous task at all.

—————

Tywin had woken up before me, though he had not left our bed. When I opened my eyes, I understood that I was cuddled against his chest. However, when I looked up at his face, he was already smiling down at me.

“Goodmorning, my dear,” he said, his voice a bit deeper and harsher than usual. He must’ve not been up for long. I smiled, adjusting myself and sitting up slightly before reaching over to kiss him. Tywin gave a soft hum against my lips, hand coming to my hair as he kissed me back. The mornings that he got to stay in bed with me were always the best ones.

“Goodmorning, Tywin. What time did you come to bed last night?” I questioned, laying back down and resting my head on his shoulder. I felt his hand lifting my nightgown, and then suddenly his warm palm against my hip. He loved to feel the skin there, for some odd reason. Though, I would never complain, for I loved it too.

“Far too late. I only managed to escape the great hall at 2:00. Your nightmare woke up just after I came to bed,” he said, resting his chin on my head. I furrowed my eyebrows, as I did not remember waking from my dreams. I had experienced a nightmare, yes, but waking up because of it? I certainly could not recall that. Well, it was of no importance.

“I see. If you’d really wanted to, you would’ve left much earlier,” I said, knowing him better than that. Tywin Lannister would never do something he didn’t want to. At least not something like that.

“It would have been inappropriate.”

“Oh yes, I’m certain.”

I laughed, shaking my head at how ridiculous my husband managed to be. I suspected not a man like him had ever lived, nor ever would again. It was almost comical, for Tywin Lannister was rarer than a dragon.

“We have much to discuss,” Tywin said after a moment, instantly making my smile fade. I could hear in his voice that he similarly did not want to, but felt it necessary. He was right, of course.

“Yes, we certainly do.”

“What’s most important to me, (Y/N), is that you’re alright. You shook during the ceremony yesterday. It’s all been somewhat overwhelming and sudden, hasn’t it?” He asked softly, one of his hands reaching for mine and holding it. I nodded, sighing out and glancing around the room.

“I suppose I- well, I hadn’t even considered that you had a claim. For some reason, the only two I had suspected were Jaime and Tyrion, and when I heard men in the hall discussing that it ought to be you, it did shock me. But it’s not you being king which frightens me, it’s the idea of me being queen. I’m nothing like my sister in that regard,” I admitted, suddenly finding one of the tapestries on the wall to be the most interesting thing I’d ever seen. Tywin had it put up after our wedding, and I hadn’t really taken any appropriate amount of time to consider it. There was something so beautiful and erotic about the nude figures, and it was a perfect distraction from my embarrassment.

Tywin suddenly moved beside me, and I realized he wanted to get up from bed. I moved off him, sitting up and watching him quizzically as he went over to a drawer and rummaged around. When he seemingly did not find what he was looking for there, he left the room. I simply waited, absolutely puzzled as to what he was doing. I assumed that like always, he was trying to prove a point.

He came back in with a rather large, rolled up parchment in his hands. He set it down on the table, undoing it and then using books that were already on the table to keep it open. Tywin then turned around and motioned for me to come over. I did so, scooting off the edge of the bed and adjusting my nightgown as I walked over to him.

He had laid out a map on the table, and after a minute it clicked in my head. It was a map of King’s Landing. I raised both eyebrows at him as a signal to explain, knowing he was going to come to a point eventually.

“As you are aware, the smallfolk of King’s Landing are not entirely fond of me. If I’m to be their king, my reforms must actually have a directly positive impact on their lives. Tell me, how do I improve a city ripe with crime, disease, overcrowding, and homelessness?” Tywin questioned, gesturing to the map he had laid out. I let out a breath that was almost a laugh, feeling that the question was impossible. Staring at the map was not helping me any.

“You cannot improve all of those things single handedly, Tywin. Therefore, I cannot possibly have any ideas that would do such a thing,” I said, knowing that we needed to be realistic in this instance. He still hadn’t come to his point yet, and it was irking me.

“It’s not single handedly, I have you. But even if I didn’t, that’s not what I mean. Give me a solution to just one of those problems, please,” he said, gazing down at me with a sort of twinkle in his eye. Where was he going with this? I looked at him hesitantly for a moment, but when all I received was an expectant look I knew he was serious.

With a sigh, I turned my eyes to the map once more. Gods, the layout of Kings Landing was absolutely horrendous. It was no wonder that overcrowding was a problem just based on the way that everything was structured. And of course, overcrowding led to disease, so I supposed a solution to the overcrowding would perhaps help that as well. The idea came to me then.

“Tywin, where was Tommen’s carriage destroyed?” I asked, turning to my husband for a moment. His expression was blank, but he pointed down to a certain street on the map.

“Right around here.”

“Well surely that much wildfire must’ve destroyed some of the street and the buildings around it, right?” I questioned, feeling that it must’ve been a completely logical assumption.

“Correct. I was told that these complexes here are practically ruins now, and several of the common folk in them were either seriously injured or killed,” Tywin informed, making my heart sink a bit. To think a religious order had caused such suffering.

“I see. We ought to make sure their families are provided for at the very least, and given reassurances that the sparrows will be held responsible,” I muttered, hearing Tywin give a hum of approval beside me.

“I’ll have Varys see to that.”

“Perhaps I ought to go with him. It will appear more genuine that way. Plus, then I can inspect the site myself. The problem with Kings Landing is that it wasn't built with any particular layout, but if we can slowly rebuild with a more thought out design, then it would be able to more adequately house the smallfolk, and if there’s less overcrowding, that also means less ability for disease to spread. Sickness is bound to spread in large cities, but if we could limit the amount of families living in one house, that ought to help,” I reasoned, continually looking down at the sheet before me and trying to formulate some kind of design in my head based off of what I knew about Highgarden’s layout. Though, King’s Landing was admittedly a much different space.

“And how do you propose we go about building such a thing? To redesign and rebuild the entire city is quite a hefty task. It would displace many,” Tywin pointed out, though I shook my head in disagreement.

“Not if we do it slowly. We could also use the sept to house people, there aren’t any more nobles in need of a marriage that grand so far as I’m concerned. And as we carry it out, we could also hire the smallfolk to help build. It would improve our economy significantly and reduce the amount of unemployed and homeless, especially because the new layout would ideally use the space available most efficiently. I’m no architect or city planner, but I’m certain we could find somebody from the citadel who would be more than helpful with that matter. We ought to focus on agriculture as well, especially with the upcoming winter. It will remain relatively warm enough to plant certain crops, and it would certainly relieve a burden off of Highgarden. Plus, the more jobs available the better,” I rambled, thinking of the endless benefits that redesigning and rebuilding King’s Landing would have. If we could execute it correctly, which I was certain we could, it would be infinitely useful.

When Tywin said nothing, I looked over my shoulder at him. I had leaned over the table subconsciously, both hands spread on the map like I was planning for battle. My husband was smiling rather fondly, and I raised a curious eyebrow. What on earth was making him grin like such a fool?

“A few years ago, (Y/N), when I saw you for the first time since you were 14, I had not a clue what to expect. For a moment, I thought you had remained as immature as you were as a young girl, but you quickly proved me wrong. You had leaned over my table then, just as you are now, and told me that we would be stupid to go through that ravine, because if Stannis sent men in another direction and they realized we were coming, we would’ve been easy to repel. You were admittedly correct, and I understood that you were no longer an inexperienced child. Now you stand here, telling me exactly how we ought to earn the respect of the smallfolk and more than that, how it will be beneficial for all involved. You underestimate yourself, (Y/N), and of all my concerns, you being a good queen is not one of them. You have always been a leader, that won’t change just because the title sounds more intimidating,” Tywin explained, stepping toward me and cupping my face in his hands. My lips parted as I stared up at him, my heart somehow pounding in my chest at the sentiment he was expressing. There was something so indescribable about the way that Tywin managed to reassure me, and I often wondered how it was possible.

I reached for the fabric of his robe, pulling him closer to me and lifting my head up to show him I wished for a kiss. He chuckled softly, moving his hands from my face and grabbing my hips instead. Tywin bent down, pressing his lips to mine with a noise of satisfaction.

“You’re far too good at that,” I whispered when he pulled away, making his eyebrow raise.

“What, kissing you?”

“No. Well, yes, that too. But I meant that you’re far too good at reassuring me. I’m always in my head and you always know how to pull me out,” I said with a smile, unable to look away from my husband for even a moment. Even after all this time I was still so smitten with him.

“It’s because you often do the same for me, even if you don’t realize it,” he remarked with a kiss to my forehead.

“And speaking of, well, reassurances… the subject of succession, your succession, I mean… do you- are you still firm on the subject of children?” I asked, knowing that was one of the other things I needed to discuss with him.

“Yes, I am. Why? Has the prospect of them being a prince or princess changed your opinion on it?” He questioned in reply, a certain hesitation in his voice as he asked it, almost as if hoping that mentioning he hadn’t changed his mind wasn’t the wrong thing to say.

“No! Gods, no. I just- I wasn’t sure if… well I don’t know. Your relationship with Tyrion has certainly improved, but I didn’t have a clue if it had improved enough to make you give him the throne. You were already unsure about giving him Casterly Rock,” I pointed out, watching him nod as he listened to what I was saying. He was contemplative.

“Casterly Rock must have prestige associated with it. Jaime is no ruler, but he would not make the Lannister name an embarrassment. To have Tyrion there, whoring and drinking constantly, would be a problem. The throne has no obligations, it is expected for kings to drink and whore. Tyrion will get the throne once I am gone, and I feel quite certain he will rule far better than most,” Tywin explained, one of his hands holding mine and the other on the table, gently tapping against the wood. He quite frequently fidgeted with his fingers, I realized. I wondered if somehow it helped him process his thoughts.

“I see. That’s easily settled then,” I remarked, somewhat glad it had been resolved so easily. I had expected a much longer conversation, but I was quite satisfied. Tyrion would be a good king.

“Yes, it is.”

I thought for a moment more, and then an insecurity from the previous night came back to me. I found myself looking down, not wanting to see Tywin’s reaction as I said what was on my mind.

“You’re correct, Tywin. Kings certainly are expected to whore, drink, and hunt,” I mumbled, feeling insanely uncomfortable with the jealousy I was experiencing. Surely every woman in the seven kingdoms would be throwing herself at him now.

“(Y/N), a crown is not suddenly going to transform me. Just like any other man, I have been with whores, and I have enjoyed them, but you are my wife. I had no need to marry you, House Tyrell was already firmly tied to House Lannister. I married you because I love you, and that means I have no intentions of being unfaithful. I would hang any woman who tried to flirt with me, because I will not see our marriage insulted that way. Rest assured that you are the only woman I want, and that is not going to change just because they decided to put me on the throne,” Tywin assured me, hand coming under my chin and forcing me to look at him. He was entirely genuine, I could see it in his eyes. In all honesty, I knew everything he said was true before he had even bothered to open his mouth, but somehow hearing it outloud brought such relief.

“I merely hate the thought of women looking at you with desire.”

“And now you understand how I feel. Perhaps you’ll stop teasing so much when I get possessive.”

I laughed then, shaking my head and embracing Tywin. There was always something so lovely about knowing I was the only person with whom he acted this way. His hands were on my hips again, and when he gave them a slight squeeze I knew exactly what he was about to say.

“And believe me, none of those whores are anything like you. It left me rather unsatisfied,” he whispered, which had initially been what I expected. Then I was given quite the surprise.

“Unsatisfied?” I questioned, wondering if he was insinuating what I thought he was. He observed me for a second, as though he were debating whether or not he ought to admit something.

“About two years ago, when you left to go make negotiations with Robb Stark, I sent a description to the brothel. At that point, I was unaware that you returned my feelings. We hadn’t even kissed yet, but you were driving me mad. It was impulsive of me to do, and I felt incredibly guilty afterwards… but I- well, I couldn’t even finish with her. From behind, she certainly looked similar. Your same height, hair color, skin tone… but she wasn’t anything like you. She did not hold herself with any confidence, the sound of her voice was wrong. She did not moan how you would’ve, and when I leaned down her scent was nothing like yours. That’s when I had to stop. I paid her and asked her to leave. She wasn’t you…” he said, revealing what was probably the most shocking thing I had ever heard him say. I was trying to process my feelings, but in all honesty I had no idea what to feel. How are you supposed to feel about learning that a man fucked a whore with you in mind? More than anything, I was just surprised. I hadn’t even considered that Tywin desired me at that point in time.

“Tywin…” I whispered, not sure what else to say. It was the only thing that would escape my throat. Should I be offended that he had done it? Should I be flattered? There certainly was something erotic about the idea that I had driven him so mad with lust he had gone so far as to find a whore that looked like me. But at the same time, I hated the idea of him fucking another woman. He was mine. Although, as he had said, that was exactly why he’d stopped. She wasn’t me.

“You had been in my room in the last day or two. We had discussed something, I don’t remember what, but you had sat on my bed. You’d been fidgeting with the lace on one of the pillows, I remember that much. You left your scent on it, and that night… when I realized…” he trailed off, and it seemed that just the memory of it had sparked lust in him. I swallowed, instantly understanding. Yes, I was decided. That was utterly erotic.

Suddenly I was picturing Tywin naked, laying in bed that night with a sort of disappointment that the whore had not fulfilled his desire for me. I imagined him turning over and suddenly inhaling a familiar scent. He would flare his nostrils a few times, discovering that something smelled just like me. He would check the pillows around him, and then he would find the one that I had left my perfume on. Tywin would proceed to inhale deeply, and the lust would spark in him again. He’d reach down, touching himself as the scent consumed him entirely and he shut his eyes.

I came back to the present after picturing that, and I felt the heat in my cheeks. To think of Tywin in such a context was entirely new, but I found that I liked it.

“Until that night, I hadn’t been with a whore since weeks before the Battle of Blackwater. Once I had spoken to you again, (Y/N), you became my only desire. You called me an insufferable cunt, fine, I would prove you otherwise. Nobody had ever dared to say such a thing, and what had piqued my interest was that I knew you did not mean it just to be insulting, it was genuinely what you thought of me. When I wasn’t working, I was thinking of you. And when those thoughts became different in their nature, I did what I thought would satisfy the urge. No. No, it most certainly did not. I couldn’t have anything less than you, I discovered. Nothing ever has and nothing ever will compare to you, (Y/N).”

I felt my heart pounding with his words, so overwhelming was the love inside of me. Suddenly I could not keep myself off of my husband. I instantly kissed him, grabbing at his hair and moaning into his mouth. He did the same in response, and every touch was so raw and genuine. He lifted me from the ground then, letting me wrap my legs around his waist as he took me over to the bed.

He sat me on the edge of the mattress, standing between my legs as his lips grasped at mine. Gods, it wasn’t even 9:00 yet and we were already like this. His hands had come to my thighs, and he had to pull away for a moment, absolutely breathless.

“(Y/N)… (Y/N)…” he muttered, pressing his forehead to mine. I cupped his cheeks, swallowing and catching my own breath.

“I love you, Tywin… I love you so much,” I whispered, smiling slightly and looking into his eyes. He also smiled softly, removing his hands from my thighs and embracing me instead. It seemed that we were both equally emotional and lust-filled.

“I love you far more than I ought to, (Y/N). My queen… my Nightshade of the Garden… my wife,” he said softly, tucking some of my hair behind my ear. He kissed me again, softer this time. I responded the exact same way.

It was an interesting thought, that I truly had no idea what would come next for us. I found that I did not care, for it did not matter. Tywin and I would continue on, just as we always did.

—————

“You look very handsome, your grace. The sash fits well.”

“It’s not your grace just yet, Cerella. And he does look handsome, even if perhaps a bit gloomy.”

I was fixing up Tywin’s outfit for the coronation, and he had decided on his black coat with the lions on the shoulders. On top of that, I had fixed a golden sash around his torso, as I was trying to prevent him from looking too plain.

“I do not appreciate your jokes,” Tywin mumbled, which only made me smile even more as I adjusted his belt. He was simply so easy to tease.

“Have you ever considered taking the black, husband? I feel confident they would allow you to keep your wardrobe,” I jested further, finally stepping away from him and feeling satisfied with his appearance. Cerella had brought in my own dress and was presently waiting for me to strip out of my nightgown.

“Ha! If I did, it would leave you begging,” he replied snarkily, only continuing to grin when I smacked his arm.

“Do you hear him, Cerella? My husband is surely the most insufferable cunt in all seven kingdoms,” I scoffed, undoing some of the lace on my nightgown and pulling it over my head. My undergarments had followed, of course, and Tywin had pretended not to notice my nudity as he ran a hand over his hair in the mirror.

“Here, my lady,” Cerella replied, handing me a fresh set to put on. She had not addressed my claim, but was smiling in a way that told me she appreciated the joke. I supposed that after serving the two of us for so long, she’d been forced to become accustomed to our constant teasing and yapping.

I pulled on the clean undergarments, and I held still as she assisted me with the lacing of my stay. After that came my gown, of course, which was a deep scarlet red. The top had minimal gold and white detail, for on top of my dress I was wearing a beautiful porcelain corset. It had absolute gorgeous ornamentation, with perfected gold detailing along the edges and roses painted on it. It had been a gift for my 24th name day, and I hadn’t found an occasion for it until now.

“You look absolutely stunning, my lady,” Cerella said as she helped me put it on. I smiled at her for a moment, and then I smiled at my reflection in the mirror. It certainly was quite the sight. Cerella had done my hair beforehand too, wanting to make sure that everything would stay in place.

“Yes, she does. You’re breathtaking, wife,” Tywin noted, coming up behind me and placing his hands on my hips, just below the corset. I hadn’t even realized he was watching, in all honesty.

“Well, my husband is being made into the king of all seven kingdoms today. If that isn’t a good occasion to be wearing this, I don’t know what is,” I remarked, watching Cerella step back and take my dirty nightclothes out. Tywin and I were left alone after a moment.

“I have something to give you, (Y/N). I’m not certain what jewelry you were planning to wear, but I think you ought to consider this.”

I watched him retrieve a flat, square box from his dresser with a small smirk on his face. I was suspicious of him, just as I always was. Tywin brought it over to me, and I turned to face him with a raised eyebrow. Carefully, he opened the case and revealed an absolutely stunning necklace. It made me gape, and I quite honestly had no clue what to say in reply.

“What do you think?” he questioned, lifting his gaze from the jewelry up to me. I managed to avert my eyes too, though with quite some difficulty.

“It’s gorgeous, Tywin. Would you- would you help me put it on?” I asked softly, watching the satisfaction settle in his eyes. He said nothing, but nodded and motioned for me to turn around. I did so, watching him move around in the mirror and remove the necklace from its case. I adjusted my hair as he came up behind me, and I could feel his breath against my ear as he hung the thing from my neck. I felt the gentle clasp of it, and he carefully removed his hands. For such a gorgeous, detailed necklace, it was not nearly as heavy as I had suspected. I put my hair back in place with a sort of entrancement.

“It looks beautiful on you,” Tywin said after a moment, still standing right behind me and admiring my reflection. Carefully, he wrapped his arms around my waist and let his head lean against mine.

“I think this would look beautiful on anyone, Tywin. Maybe even on you,” I jested, though there was no humor in my voice. Something about seeing myself this way was shocking, and I could not tear my eyes away. I looked like a queen.

“No, I doubt that. I had it specifically made for you, the measurements are specific. You are the only woman who’s ever been meant to wear it,” he said, his voice low and clear. I placed my hands on top of his, swallowing and then letting my lips part with a sort of overwhelmed feeling.

“I wonder, Tywin, if you will ever stop spoiling me like a child,” I remarked, finally looking at him. As well as I could, anyways, for our faces were rather close.

“I have never spoiled you like a child. I have spoiled you like a wife—as you deserve,” he replied, placing a chaste kiss against my neck. I leaned into him, a sort of warmth filling me. To think this man had been my worst enemy a few years ago was incredibly odd, for now he was the most important person in my life. To think that a cut, a sword, and a set of armor might’ve changed my life forever.

There was a knock at our door which I recognized as Cerella’s, and I knew it must be time for us to leave. I moved myself from Tywin’s grasp, though I took his arm once I had. From there, we made our way out of the tower of the hand and down to the throne room. The walk was quiet, but the entire time Tywin kept me close. Occasionally, he would look over at me and hold my gaze for a few moments before looking away. I wondered if perhaps he was trying to make sure I was still there, as stupid as that sounded.

When we reached the double doors, I felt him take a deep breath and noticed his gaze set firmly on the wood in front of us. I pressed my lips together, blinking a few times as I debated whether or not I should ask him how he was doing. I decided it would do little harm.

“Are you alright, Tywin?”

“Of course.”

It was kurt, and perhaps a bit sharper than he had intended. He was stressed, I understood. He was not easily made this way, either, and I felt awful. The man standing beside me was not only Tywin, he was the king. In this moment, the second identity had to be worn.

“I did not mean to use such a tone,” he said after a minute or so, finally looking at me. There was the husband again.

“It’s alright, Tywin. You don’t need to apologize. Not today,” I whispered, giving him a sympathetic look. A sort of relief settled in his face, as though he was at least glad I was not upset by what he had said. I had learned Tywin well enough to know it was not truly him.

Slowly, the double doors were pulled open and the two of us were shown to the entire court. My heart skipped a beat, as if I was suddenly processing that we both were on public display. With a swallow, I stepped forward in sync with Tywin, looking straight ahead in spite of my nerves and desire to observe every face. Margaery would inform me of looks afterwards, I was certain.

There was a silence in the room as Tywin and I walked through the isle, heading straight up to the throne. It was almost like a moment of peace, a moment of time that nobody else existed in. I found that I could not resist the urge to look at Tywin, and even despite his appearance as king today, he looked back at me. Oh, and those eyes. Those blue, blue eyes with their green flecks. I loved this man so much.

We reached the platform then, and together we ascended up the steps. I made eye contact with Kevan, who Tywin had chosen as Hand of the King, for he never wanted politics to cause strife in our marriage. Although, both of us were aware that I would continue to be his most trusted source of guidance and advice. And, it was a good thing Kevan was hand too, for I did not want to relinquish our chambers in the tower and he had no problem whatsoever taking the kings instead. The bed was bigger in there, but Tywin and I had no problem sleeping close together.

It was Kevan who I had expected to stand beside at the ceremony, too, but Tywin did not drop his arm. With an open mouth, I found myself standing in front of the throne with him, and there was a smug look on his face.

“Let them see that the queen has every bit of power that the king does. Your title is owed a crown,” he whispered before we turned around to look upon the crowd. I was still somewhat shocked, but I did not let it show as we faced everyone.

Tywin’s arm detached from mine then, but he then opted to grab my hand instead. He was certainly full of surprises today, and I could not keep myself from giving a subtle smile when his hand squeezed mine.

The high septon was behind us, and once Tywin and I had settled in, he began with the ceremonials. I—in all honesty—was not listening to what he was saying whatsoever. Tywin had been running his thumb up and down the side of my hand for the last several minutes, and that was all I could focus on. That and the two crowns I had noticed in the corner of my eye. One was much larger, and had the face of a lion upon it. The other was about the size of my head, and was covered in thorns and roses.

The high septon had been going on about the seven blessing and guiding Tywin for at least 10 minutes now, and I hadn’t really processed what was being said until I was mentioned. It was not something that had ever been said in a coronation before, at least as far as I was concerned, and Tywin had given me the most fulfilled of looks when he’d heard it.

“And may his lady wife support him in all his endeavors and be a pillar of strength in the crown. May she show love, compassion, and kindness to all in the kingdoms, and lead just as bravely as the man beside her. The Queen (Y/N) Tyrell, long may she reign,” he said, placing the golden crown of roses atop my head. Its weight was pleasant, and the echo of ‘long may she reign’ from everyone in the hall sent a slight shiver up my spine. Tywin squeezed my hand once more.

After that, the High Septon moved on to Tywin, and I was unable to remove my eyes from my husband. He looked every bit the king, standing tall with his perfect posture and elegant coat. The High Septon held the crown above his head, and with a shout of ‘long may he reign,’ it was placed upon his head.

“Long may he reign,” I repeated with the rest of the crowd, smiling at the sight of the golden lion upon Tywin’s white hair. It matched the blonde strands that remained on the edges of his head and his cheeks.

Loud applause filled the room for King Tywin, first of his name, and I experienced the sort of feeling that one gets before battle. The feeling of rallying your men, of hearing them cheer as they prepare to die for you. Would these men fight for my husband? Would they die for him? I would.

Tywin looked over at me then, and when our eyes met I knew everything would be alright, somehow. There were trials to come, I knew, but it was impossible to feel frightened when the man beside me was looking at me the way he was. Tywin and I had faced everything together for the last few years, and I had no doubt in my mind that we would continue to do so now.

“My Queen,” Tywin muttered, lifting our hands and kissing the back of mine. It was as if he had forgotten everyone in the hall was there, even as their applause continued to ring in our ears. I smiled even more now, looking up at my husband with utter adoration. Every choice I’d made in my life had been the right one, for I could not imagine living without this man. The Great Lion of the Rock and the Nightshade of the Garden.

Tywin Lannister, I could say confidently, was the most important thing in my life. The man I trusted, guided, received guidance from. But most importantly he was the man I loved. They said that Westeros had not seen a match such as ours in centuries, if ever. And standing beside Tywin in front of the throne, his hand in mine and our eyes stuck on each other, I had the odd sensation that they never would again. For how could they?

I could not imagine another tale such as ours, with the hatred of him in my youth turning to eventual friendship in my adulthood, and then that friendship eventually turning to love. Tywin and I had fought wars together, settled conflict together, and kept all seven kingdoms intact together. What other couple could boast that? None. None could. There were no couples like us. There were no people like us. There was only us.

My thoughts were interrupted by the feeling of Tywin’s hand at my waist, and I realized that he was pulling me towards him. Before all present in the hall, he kissed me. Tywin was passionate, and yet simultaneously loving. I could not resist the urge to smile as I kissed back, the sensation of his familiar lips causing a wave of utter contentment to wash over me. A sense of peace. When Tywin pulled away, he smiled at me. It wasn’t even a small smile, it was genuine and raw. And I could see in his eyes, it was not the crown atop his head that had made him smile. It had been me, standing right beside him as the High Septon had placed it atop his head. I kissed him once more, with not a single care as I did so.

For they would never see our like again.

TAGLIST:

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@ladysindar @vesta-ro @exo-nova @paola-carter

@prettykinkysoul

@fullmoonshadowwrites @kishie8

@the-desilittle-bird @dianilaws @girlonfireice

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@abigfanofgameofthrones @smalltownbigheart

@frombloodandflesh @supernaturalismyreligion666

@thanyatargaryen @rey26 @hexandale @pkawaiidesu5394 @aimsro

#tywin lannister #tywin lannister x reader #game of thrones #game of thrones x reader #house lannister #charles dance #tywin x reader #asoiaf #a lion in the garden

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total-drama-brainrot · 2 months

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If you can change anything about total drama what would you do?

I'd change the writing.

My main gripe with the show's writing is how it treats it's girls.

I know it's a product of it's time, but something about how practically every girl's story arc in the show revolves around a guy (or at the very least, somehow shoehorns in something about her love life) rubs me the wrong way. The only girl who doesn't have an androcentric subplot going on is Heather, until World Tour came along and centralised her whole 'redemption' arc around Aleheather.

Even Katie and Sadie fall into this trap; their whole thing is being unhealthily co-dependant with each other, and yet they're always at odds with each other over a boy (usually Justin).

But the worst offender for me is the way Courtney is treated. Courtney's whole character revolves itself around her feelings for Duncan- to the point that her elimination is literally caused by her being his "love interest" (thanks Harold)- and all of her development as a character stems from Duncan's influence. Meanwhile, all of Duncan's development as a character is entirely introspective, Courtney doesn't really influence anything about him that wasn't already apparent. Maybe she softens his hard outer shell a bit, but we already know that he's got a "heart of gold" behind his tough guy persona so Courtney's influence doesn't really achieve much in terms of Duncan's growth. That's just in Island! In Action and World Tour, Courtney's whole character still revolves around Duncan to the point she becomes obsessive and controlling. Every conflict she faces is centred around Duncan. She's never allowed to grow and change as a person without it somehow circling back to Duncan.

Let these girls have story arcs and conflicts that don't revolve around the men in their lives.

But the writing overall is just... inconsistent? Sporadic. Weirdly paced.

The reboot is the worst victim of poor writing choices, in my opinion, which I know is probably caused by the time constraints due to a significantly shorter allotted runtime, but especially in season two of the reboot there's this constant feeling of wonky pacing and weird plotline priorities. Julia's whole plotline is stilted and the majority of her interesting actions happen off-screen. Subplots are established and built up just to be discarded within the span of an episode or two; i.e. the Rajbow cheating arc, whatever "Normal" Girl has going on, Zee's soda brand deal, Millie's teased character arc and resulting character derailment, ect.

And the main focus of the season? The most boring romantic plot of all time. Priyaleb could've been something great, and I believe that with my whole heart, but the way it actually played out just left a sour taste in my mouth. It wasn't fun to watch, it wasn't engaging or otherwise entertaining to watch, it was just painful. Again, it's the weird pacing and sporadic shifts in narrative that make it all fall apart. I could rant about how disastrous the Priyaleb plot was for hours.

And I really don't mean any disrespect towards the writing team when I say all of this. It's a hard job, made even harder by the time constraints and the limitations they've probably got set in place as a children's show. But I can't help but wonder where this show's potential could've taken it if the writing wasn't so... Like That.

#gonna stop here before i really do go on a full rant #all i'm saying is if i was in the writer's room for the reboot caleb would've been aroace and priya would've kissed a girl #my main gripe with the og series is the period-typical misogyny but i've already touched on that in another post sooooo #total drama #ophe rambling #please ignore this idk what i'm talking about

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butterflydm · 8 months

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s3 spec (distracting myself from waiting for the new episode)

Well, it's a Thursday morning and it's hours until the new episode (plus I have to wait until after work to watch) so... wild speculation about s3! Guaranteed to have many wrong guesses! Let's go!

(contains spoilers through book 8: the path of daggers)

What is it going to mean in a practical sense that s3 will be a 'closer' adaptation of book 4?

What do the characters do in book 4 that needs to be adapted?

I'll start with the easiest person first: Perrin needs to meet Faile and begin the process of falling in love; and he needs to go to the Two Rivers to defend it from Whitecloaks and Trollocs. This is Perrin's clearest and most cinematic plotline in the entire series. It's also been pretty cleanly set up in the show already.

In the books, he goes to the Two Rivers with Loial, Gaul, Bain, Chiad, and Faile.

speculation: the show, he will first meet Faile in the Two Rivers, there as a Hunter of the Horn; Bain and Chiad will go with him in Aviendha's stead, because Aviendha will obligated to go back to the 3FL; Loial has a friendship with Perrin and it makes sense that he would go - in the show, Perrin is the person that Loial has spent the most time with and is closest to; Gaul will probably be introduced when we get more Aiel at the start of s3 and will decide to go with Perrin... maybe because Chiad and Bain are going with him?

Alanna and Verin might also likely be waiting for Perrin in the Two Rivers.

Second easiest: Rand needs to go to the Aiel Waste, go to Rhuidean, and become the Car'a'carn. He's already in place to find out at the end of this season or the start of next season that he's potentially the Aiel's Car'a'carn, but needs to prove it. Moiraine may tell him that he needs an army and the Aiel are fierce warriors, plus he may want to learn more about his biological parents and their past. Moiraine and Lan would naturally want to go with him to keep training him, so that part's easy.

In the books, Egwene goes with him to learn how to be a Dreamer from the Aiel Wise Ones. But that's a book 3 plot and she hasn't touched on it at all yet this season. Will we see any hints of her being a Dreamer this season or will that begin at the start of s3?

Theoretically, Egwene doesn't have to go with Rand to Rhiudean -- she could go back to the Tower with Elayne and Nynaeve so that she and Elayne can take their Accepted tests, find out that Liandrin has flown the coop, and get clues on where to chase her. Then she Dreams and learns she needs to go to Rhuidean, and so she... travels there on her own? While Elayne and Nynaeve head off to chase the Black Ajah on their own? This would mean that Liandrin is 100% revealed to Siuan as Black Ajah. idk this part is wobbly for me (narratively, it's so much easier if Egwene just goes to the Waste with Rand)

Mat also needs to go to Rhuidean. If Egwene does go back to the Tower, then Mat could go with her and then onto the Waste (but why would he ever want to go back to the place he was imprisoned for months? a second round of dagger healing?)

It feels like we need the redstone doorway, or something similar, to keep Mat on his path to Rhuidean rather than going back with Perrin to the Two Rivers. That was the question that Mat originally entered with, iirc -- should he go home to the Two Rivers? And he was told to go to Rhuidean instead.

Will the parts of book 4 that happen in Tear mostly happen in Falme instead?

They can't interrogate any Black Ajah, because there aren't any around in Falme, but we could see the bubbles of evil, we could see the redstone doorway (Turak, as a collector of ancient oddities, might be the owner of it in his version), and we could get the beginnings of the Forsaken Civil War that is kinda happening around this time, as Lanfear works to defend Rand while another Forsaken is sending Shadowspawn to attack him. None of that really needs to happen in Tear specifically.

On an interpersonal level, we might get Rand and Egwene's final breakup in the first episode or so of s3. They've both been through so much, they're on different paths, etc.

The pace in the series has been pretty fast (the Seanchan showed up this season so much sooner than I expected).

New characters that s3 will introduce: Faile for sure; a bunch of Aiel for Rand & co to interact with; and Elayne & Nynaeve may still end up dealing with a Seanchan who was left behind when the Seanchan run away at the end of this season. They might introduce Melindhra next season, to give her relationship with Mat time to develop before the big betrayal. When I did my reread, I was actually really surprised at how little Melindhra there was. We'll probably be getting Moghedien and Asmodean, and potentially Rahvin or Graendal as well. We kinda need both a 'claim Rand' faction and a 'kill Rand' faction in the Forsaken.

We'll probably get an episode focused around the Battle of the Two Rivers (Perrin episode). Hopefully we'll get a focused episode for Rhuidean as well (Rand & Mat episode). So that's two out of eight. The coup should happen this season -- maybe that will be our big midpoint moment, when the momentum of the season shifts? That's three. And the finale would be Rand at Alcair Dal & then capturing Asmodean, while Nynaeve faces off against Moghedien?

So: first episodes does the setup of expectations for the season; then we travel to our new locations from Falme; we get introduced to Caemlyn at some point (are we going to have multiple episodes with scenes in Caemlyn?); boom the coup happens; boom Rhuidean happens; boom the Battle of the Two Rivers happens; then Rand goes to announce himself as Car'a'carn and faces off against Asmodean and ends up with him as a captive teacher.

ep1: Falme taking the place of Tear in terms of set-up events

ep2: having left Falme at the end of ep1, we arrive at our destinations? maybe this is Egwene & Elayne's Accepted tests

ep3: Perrin arrives in the Two Rivers, Wondergirls leave the Tower (again), Rand arrives in the 3FL

ep4: the Tower coup happens when Elaida arrives to find Elayne missing (again)

ep5: Rhuidean?

ep6: something something... maybe Nynaeve & Elayne's plotline?

ep7: battle of the Two Rivers

ep 8: alcair dal & asmodean

Things from the first four books left to be tackled in future books at that point: just the taking of Tear from the end of bk3, basically. Mat's luck, potentially, though that might still get introduced this season (not sure there's time but, hey, it very well could be).

It does make sense to me to wait on introducing Tear until Callandor actually matters in the story which isn't until... wow, The Path of Daggers, I think, is the first time that Callandor really matters in the story. That's when Rand uses it against the Seanchan and it messes him up and he ends up killing some of his own people. Which would mean that it wouldn't need to happen until even after The Box (TM) and Dumai's Wells and such. Is that right? That feels so late in the story for the book 3 Quest Item to actually matter!

Hmm, Tear as happening AFTER the kidnapping would basically make it replace Illian, which I could see working (Rand ruling Illian literally never matters narratively in the books - it's never really a full setting the way that Cairhien, Tear, or Caemlyn are; it has a strong emotional beat of Rand feeling like he's earned it as Rand al'Thor and not just the Dragon Reborn, but that kind of beat can be done in other ways).

idk it depends in part on how they're going to be handling Caemlyn and on Elayne's storylines, because she and Rand need a solid chunk of time together. How and when will the show carve out the time for them? Could the Black Ajah hunt actually lead our main players back to Cairhien, and they meet up with Rand there with the Aiel?

haha okay I am trying to peer WAY too far in the future and we just do not have enough information for that right now. I'm just way too impatient for tonight's episode, lol.

#wot speculation #wot #wheel of time #wot on prime #wot book spoilers #the path of daggers

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mariatesstruther · 9 months

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I honestly don't get why Maria was so anti-Joel oh he's a horrible person he's done horrible things he can't be around us, but accepted Tommy fully to the point he's the father of her child when both did the same things, ran with the same people and all of that.

I mean I love the character, but that confuses the hell out of me. Why's Tommy accepted but Joel damned?

okay, so… this response took me like half hour to write. my wrists hurt, my jaw is clenched, my brain is hot. i love u anon thank u very much for this chance to vent about just why my girl maria has been so misunderstood. let’s go

i personally think this is where many people fundamentally misunderstand maria’s perception of joel. she’s not cautious of him primarily because of tommy or anything tommy has said, in my personal opinion—she’s cautious of him for and because of ellie

ive said this on my blog a few times and i think so have @steeb-stn and @clickergossip (and maybe @liveandletcry23 and @bumblepony i have a shit memory so tagging just in case) so im gonna tag them to credit their words and ideas about maria as well, but the FIRST time maria sees joel, he’s with this rando twelve year old girl who he is seemingly so protective over that she cant even be sniffed by dogs who are just trying to detect infection, which would be good for ANYBODY. that’s his first strike for untrustworthyness, because why the fuck wouldn’t he let this girl be tested???—we know why, of course, but maria doesnt. shes working on the very limited info about joel/ellie’s relationship that she has from just her own observations, and i think we need to remember that as we go through analyzing why she moves how she moves

shes knows from tommy at this point is that joel had a daughter, but it is definitely not this little girl. so why the fuck are they so close. what have they gone through. are they okay. is ellie okay. is their relationship safe for her??? THAT’s what she’s thinking about, in my opinion, while shes staring joel down at that dinner table. she’s reasonbly suspicious, and i can’t blame her for it.

i had to cut this it’s literally maybe my longest post ever so. heres the cut

ALSO, it’s not like she’s a straight up bitch to joel like some of y’all seem to make it out to be??? she never says or implies that “they can’t be around” or anything like that. she offers them clothes and food and supplies. she sets them up in a house. before dinner, she gives them a personal tour (which, to be fair, she did because she was probably trying to keep an eye on them and figure out more about whether or not ellie is safe, but who wouldnt???? i know tess would! and yall would love her for it!). tommy literally says to joel before they leave that there will always be a place for him and ellie in jackson—you cannot tell me you believe he said so without already have maria’s green light for joel and ellie to stay

ALSO, i wanna consider some other things that i haven’t seen many ppl talk about. on that walk she takes with tommy and joel and ellie, she makes it sound like tommy has been with them for at least years AND she maintains the confidence to say that residents in jackson stay off the radio—i could totally be wrong, but it seems to me from the look tommy and joel share right after that it’s obvious tommy has been talking to joel BEHIND MARIA’S BACK???? did no one else catch that??? am i misinterpreting big time??? id assume because theyre married and from the way tommy talks about jackson that he’s been in jackson for at least 3 years maybe, and we know that he only stopped radioing joel a couple months before the show’s main plotline starts, so timeline wise there had to be some overlap of tommy still radioing joel from/around jackson. idk if anyone of my mutuals has thoughts on this but i personally think it’s important to point out, because it establishes that maria likely doesn’t know or think tommy and joel kept in contact, at least not as recently as up to some months ago. she knows that tommy and joel are close, but at the same time, she doesn’t think tommy really knows or talks to joel anymore, either. so how is she supposed to extend him any trust as tommy’s brother????? how and why would she give this man any benefit of the doubt???? it wouldn’t make any sense. she’s more practical and discerning than she is naive and kind, and y’all can think what y’al want about that but i love her for it. it’s very necessary for a woman like her to be the way she is

okay, so back to your question. back to why joel is “damned” and tommy is “accepted.” let’s talk about joel for a sec

y’all like to babygirl and idolize the absolute fuck out of this man

we know that not only was he a smuggler, but he killed and tricked and took advantage of people, shamelessly and brutally. we know that tommy did so too. maria knows that tommy has done the same things. maria also knows that tommy left that life because he couldnt do it anymore, and joel continued because he could

point blank period!!!!! yall can argue with me all u want but tommy left that murder life and joel did not. im not saying this makes either brother good or bad or better than the other, i love joel sm and i think both of them have an undisputed capability to do unspeakable things in order to survive. but tommy got to a point where he hit a limit, whereas joel doesn’t seem to have one. this is at least my personal interpretation of their conversations in the game and the show

tommy DID join the fireflies, which we all know now is not any fucking better than whatever the fuck joel was doing—the difference is the reasoning, though, and considering tlou is all about reasoning and the why, we need to consider the reasoning behind tommy’s decision: he wanted to do something better, something good, something he thought had a purpose. we all know now that the fireflies are bullshit, their purpose is bullshit, and they’re willingness to kill a child for the sake of the “cure” is it’s own entire paradox of bullshit. but they were a rebel organization fighting fedra, who fucking suck, and probably had somewhat of a better reputation back when tommy was interested in joining—or maybe they didn’t, to be fair, i don’t know! the point is, tommy went to them seeking some sort of better purpose, some type of redeption; in joel’s own fucking words, “tommy’s what we used to call a joiner. had dreams of becoming a hero... wants to save the world.”

tommy is idealistic. he’s romantic. he’s optimistic, almost to the point of being fucking naive. thats why he enlisted in the army, thats why he enlisted in the fireflies—he wanted to feel good about himself and the world he was living in. he needed it to have some light at the end of the tunnel for all the bullshit to make sense. and yeah, he was wrong both times in joining up. we know that, joel knew that while it was happening, and tommy knows that in retrospect, too. i think jackson is the first place he really found true, real purpose—not the kind that is propagandized to you and goes up in smoke, but the kind that is well and truly earned. that’s why he is so loyal to jackson and to maria—they finally gave him was he desperately spent his life searching for

and im just saying, from maria’s perspective, she’s someone who lives for purpose. she lives for jackson and for it’s people and for it’s future, and she has to maintain some sense of idealism in the face of all that fucking ugliness to be able to mentally live im and run a place like jackson, to believe that it’ll work. i think that idealism she has, she sees reflected in tommy’s desperation to be a better person who’s fighting for a better life. she sees that need for redemption and goodness in him, that need for things to be fucking worth it, and hears she hears it in his story. she gets to relate to him with this in a way she doesnt GET TO RELATE with joel YET (we STILL HAVE TIME PEOPLE. WE HOLDIN OUT STRONG FOR THE JOEL AND MARIA BEST FRIEND AGENDA)

but to continue, THEN maria spends YEARS with tommy, getting to know him, getting to know his guilt. just like tess with joel, she’s sees the worst and the best of him and gets to fall in love with all of it. so of course there’s gonna be a bit of a bias and a blindspot, towards him—just like any of are other characters have weak spots for the people THEY fucking love

so that’s i guess why i think tommy is “accepted” by her, i guess, and there’s honestly way more them and their romance that i could make a whole separate post about but i’ll leave it there for now. back to joel and why he’s “damned,” which i don’t think he is

again, from what maria knows, he made an active CHOICE to stay in the lifestyle of smuggling and murdering and QZ bullshit, even after tommy chose to leave—and idk what y’all imagine joel and tess to be doing in those many years on their own, but it’s not fuckin picking flowers, for me. they’re dangerous, dangerous people—more dangerous that fedra, and more dangerous than the fireflies, if we’re being fucking real about it. and we LOVE tess and joel for this, or at least i do

but jackson is not a place where people get by with smuggling or backstreet deals or threats. it’s not supposed to be that place. we all LOVE jackson in fics and hcs and aus because it’s literally a place where joel and ellie finally get to breathe and not worry about their safety/survival first. and you know who keeps jackson that way????? MARIA. AND HE BEING FUCKING PICKING ABOUT WHO JACKSON LETS THE FUCK INSIDE

so yall just expect her to by YIPPY SKIPPY when joel, THE JOEL THE SUPER SMUGGLER MURDER COWBOY, strolls into town????? WITHOUT TESS, WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE MORE PERSONABLE AND REASONABLE ONE???? what????? she’d be crazy not to at least try to be a little intimidating, to make it clear to joel that he will not get away with any of that qz bullshit here. she’d be naive not to, and maria is anything but naive

and i know most people don’t like her for that “a bad reputation doesn’t mean you’re bad” “not always, at least” line, but i actually think it really fits so well in establishing that she’s not afraid of joel, not afraid of challenging him or making him own up to things he’s done. it’s just so so cool to me, i just can’t hate her for that????? she’s establishing with him that she knows what tommy knows about his time in the QZ, and she’s letting him know if that joel shows up here in jackson, there will be fucking problems for him. which i think is a completely fair warning????

so let’s continue. let’s talk about The Scene, the one with her and ellie, the one with the “tommy was following joel” line. ONE thing i’d like to point out about this scene—MARIA IS THE ONE TO TELL ELLIE ABOUT SARAH, NOT JOEL. AND THAT IS A BIG BIG BIG REASON FOR WHY SHE WARNS ELLIE NOT TO TRUST JOEL COMPLETELY

we know what joel and ellie have gone through, at this point, but maria has barely any idea. she sees that ellie has this fierce protectiveness and lots of secrets when it comes to her and joel, which like—can we all be fucking objective here for a second. this can SO easily and SO reasonably be interpreted as something sketchy going on between joel and ellie that maria should be concerned about.

(slight tw about older men-younger woman relationships bc im gonna be personal for a sec, its quick) we don’t know maria’s past or what she has seen or been through, but personally as someone who has been in a situation where an older man has taken advantage of my naivety in the past, i am now extremely hyper vigilant when it comes to young girls around older men in my personal life today. ellie and joel’s situation and how it looks would raise MJAOR red flags for me personally, if i was in maria’s position. that’s just a personal perspective have that really affects the way i view this scene (end tw)

and so maria finds out that joel has kept the fact that HE HAD A WHOLE ASS DAUGHTER from ellie?????? WOULD THAT NOT BE SUS AT ALL TO YALL???? i mean we know why joel doesn’t tell ellie, as gameplayers and watchers of the show, but again. maria is operating on the info she has right in front of her, which is that joel has been omitting maybe the biggest fact of his life from this young girl who is willing to defend and trust him with her entire life, even after she finds out she’s being lied to. this is alarming

so at this point, she’s questioning joel’s intentions with ellie, and in my opinion, it’s not at all unreasonable for her to do so. she then continues to press, because the red flags are flying and she wants ellie to be crystal clear on the kind of man she’s traveling with (“there are CLEARLY things you don’t know about joel” — “so then you understand my concerns”)

AND THEN ELLIE. BLESSED SMART AMAZING ELLIE COMES IN WITH THE DEFENSE—“and tommy did it too, are you worried about him?”—which like, i love this line. i love this moment. i think because i go so hard for maria a lot of y’all think i’m blind to when ellie is making points, but i 100% cheered her on when i first watched this scene, like i’m sure y’all did—because it’s true! it’s fair! if maria is going to judge joel for those things, she needs to extend the same judgement to tommy

the thing is, it’s still fucking true that, as i said earlier, tommy left that life. both the smuggling, and the fireflies—he chose to stop, while joel didn’t—he was smuggling literally up until the day him and tess found ellie, so. there’s that. she continues to judge joel and not tommy because she knows for sure that tommy has changed. she doesn’t know joel enough yet to see that he has changed, too

so then, the dreaded line: “tommy was following joel.” let’s talk about it.

i don’t love this line either, tbh! i think it’s a weak defense on maria’s part, and a weak line on the tlou hbo writers part—probably my least favorite line of maria’s overall. but i do get why she says it, and i kind of think i get the purpose??? i think????

it reminds me a lot of joel’s line, earlier, about tommy being a “joiner,” and i think it’s funny that, as opposite as joel and maria like to think they both are to each other, the way they describe tommy is pretty much the same. tommy is a “joiner” to joel and a “follower” to maria, and in all respects they both love and hate him for it. idk where i’m going with that exactly, just something interesting to think about in terms of the joel and maria best friend agenda

but i also think this line get’s taken out of context a lot, because the full line is “tommy was following joel, the way you are now.” maria says this line to lead into her main point, the really fucking important line in this scene: “be careful who you put your faith in. the only ones who can betray us, are the one’s we trust.”

WHICH IS TRUE. IT IS THE POINT. AND WHEN JOEL LIES TO ELLIE, HIDES SOMETHING FROM HER YET AGAIN at the end of the season/game, IT BECOMES A THEMATIC CLIMAX POINT THAT CONNECTS BOTH OF THE GAMES

maria is not saying this to “damn” joel—and i personally don’t think she is “damning” joel in the way you imply here, as there’s definitely potential for them to develop a relationship in s2 once she has more information about the truth of how he thinks of ellie. i think she’s warning ellie not to trust joel, because she doesn’t trust joel, at the end of the fucking day—and that’s about it. she trusts tommy in a way that she can’t quite trust joel yet, and why would she, at this point? it would make no sense for her to

so y’all can blame her and hate her for her distrust all you guys want (btw not necessarily talking to you, anon, ive just gotten some very nasty asks about maria from others so im talking to them rn!!!!!!!), but i’m sorry—you can’t tell me that it doesn’t at least make sense. she’s MARIA. she’s MADE OF SENSE

#WHEW #DO MY THUMBS HURT #i cant even be bothered to tag this fr #maria miller #asked and answered #joel and maria best friend agenda #tommy miller #joel miller #tess servopoulos

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seasidepierre · 2 years

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sunkissed face part 6 | charles leclerc

FORMULA ONE DRIVERS MASTERLIST

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

summary: Long distance relationship are not the easiest ones, but when you’re seeing Charles Leclerc, it makes things easier.

warnings: You’ll want to bitch slap Harrison.

words count: 4.7k

a/n: Can you believe I posted Sunkissed Face as a one-time fic and it ended up having six parts? Also, I didn’t even have 200 followers when I started Sunkissed and now I have 1.5k.. It’s just crazy how much you guys keep blowing my mind up with your support and kindness 🤍 Sunkissed Face is not over, I still have at least two parts in mind, but who knows when I’ll think I’ve rounded up everything I had to say about them? Maybe by next year, I’ll be done with them? As long as you’ll want them back, I’ll be happy to bring them some love. In the meantime, enjoy this one 🤍 (special thanks to my friend Bunny, who came up with some details about this and who’s the best at listening to me rant about plotlines and bitchy characters. You’re the best, thank you so much for supporting me and all my babies so much 🤍 🤍 🤍)

Of course, you knew good things had to come to an end but as you drove back from the airport, your little car felt like it was suddenly way more spacious than it had been on the drive over. Charles had been sitting on the passenger seat, his weekend bag on the backseat, and if his knees had been close to bump into the glovebox at first, he had slid the seat back and found the best way to rest his long limbs in the small interior of the car. He left you in charge of Waze and took your phone to take care of the music. The drive had been punctuated by Chris Martin’s voice, making you discover Charles’ poor singing qualities when he tried to make you laugh by belting the lyrics way too loud. However, on calmer songs, you realised that when he didn’t pay much attention to what he was doing, his humming didn’t sound half as bad as he thought it did. He sounded pretty calm and nice, actually. Another thing to add to the already long list of things that made Charles the most perfect human ever. It could have been annoying if you weren’t so infatuated with him already.

Charles had decided to fly commercial this time, because jets are nice when they’re not used all the time. Make it a recurring habit and you lose the novelty of it all. So here you had stood, in the hall of Heathrow, trying to stay hidden until he’d have to pass security and be gone to you for good. You did, however, find a compromise when both your hearts tightened at the idea of losing the warmth of the other and even Charles looked sad to be leaving.

“Come with me in France,” He uttered against your lips, peppering kisses between his words. “It’s not too far, you won’t have to miss work if you leave on Friday evening. The flight is barely two hours long. You can leave at the end of Sunday afternoon.”

When you shook your head from left to right and ended up blubbering that even though you would love to but didn’t really have the funds for, Charles had dragged you to a commercial booth and booked your flights himself. You didn’t find the mental strength to say no to him. You knew he had spent enough money on you as it already was, but if it meant being able to see him again in barely a couple of weeks, you’d take it. To thank him for it, you had kissed his brains out when the moment came to say goodbye, which he’d been pretty happy about. Charles was easy to please. To hold his hand and to kiss his lips was enough to fill his heart with happiness. It was refreshing to be plenty enough for someone you were dating. It hadn’t been the case for your last relationships, finding yourself having to go to great lengths to make sure the relationship would last. It had always been in vain, now that you thought about it, confirming to you that changing your whole instinct and being wasn’t worth it in the slightest. Charles felt like he took you for what you were and appreciated what you had to offer. You liked him for what he gave you and he was plenty sufficient.

You were just happy you could meet him halfway and he didn’t think about the relationship as some kind of equilibrium that needed a complete and perfect balance. Some days he was the one putting a bit more work in it. Some days it was you. The last handful of days have shown exactly that, as you spent your entire Sunday in pyjamas, his hands barely ever leaving your body, his lips tracing words on your skin while you two channel-surfed on the TV trying to find something interesting to watch. You ended up watching a Marvel movie, which made him laugh and send a DM to Tom with a picture of the TV, stating a blatant “I can’t escape you, apparently” which made Tom giggle on his side. The movie ended up in the background when you turned back to him, dragged him down to lie on the couch and launched the two of you in the longest makeout session you’ve ever experienced.

You cooked lunch.

He ordered dinner.

You took turns in the shower and went to bed way too early for two young people in love, but you got to lay between his thighs and read your book while he used your shoulder as a chin rest to scroll on his phone. There wasn’t anything exciting or thrilling happening, still it had been a really good day, spent in each other’s delicious embrace, kissing until your lips felt sore and learning how each other’s body reacted to the touch.

There wasn’t much else you would have rather done.

And you were going to do it all again in just a couple of weeks.

But in the meantime, you had to go back to your tiny flat, which was about to feel very empty now that the sound of his breathing wasn’t going to echo between your bedroom’s walls.

☀️

It didn’t take long for you to find something to do. The first couple of days had been pretty lonely, but you found yourself hung up on your phone’s notifications, waiting for a text that would put a smile on your face. Lucky for you, Charles seeked contact just as much as you did and you realised that he was just as chatty through writing than through vocal communications. He sent you pictures of what he was doing, views of his hotel room in Baku, pictures of himself in his bright red car and mirror selfies with his racing suit hanging low on his hips, which definitely didn’t help with the loneliness you were feeling.

You wished he was here. You wished he was next to you. You wish you didn’t have to get your fix by diving nose first into the pillow he had used in your bed. You wish you didn’t have to cling to the sweatshirt he had “forgot” on your couch. But you didn’t want to have him any other way, so any second he was willing and able to give you felt like a gift.

Still didn’t mean that you weren’t feeling lonely, nor that you weren’t dealing with a major case of FOMO. Charles had just raced in Baku, having missed out on a podium by just a bit to his good friend Pierre. He had told you he was disappointed but it was largely balanced by his happiness for his best friend and you found it extremely adorable. The two of them had celebrated in a club that same night and you had had the pleasure of texting with Pierre through Charles’ phone because he was too drunk and you were getting worried as he didn’t answer his phone. Pierre had explained that he usually was taking care of Charles’ phone when they were out drinking because he had a tendency of leaving it on the tables or couches and losing it in the end.

Now, Charles was on a flight to Italy, to work at Maranello again, and you hadn’t seen his face, other than on Instagram or on TV, since he left Heathrow about three weeks ago. You had holed up in your flat since you came back from the airport and had barely received visits, apart from the exception of an odd visit from Tom that ended up with him having to rush out because one of the twins was locked outside of their place. You had seen him for barely an hour, which had been a nice breath of fresh air, but it really didn’t feel like enough. In a way, it was your fault too, you passed on Pub Quizz Saturday that past weekend, because your work had caught up with you and you had been swamped under files or other festivities like that.

So when Harry sent a text inviting you to a movie night, you took the bait so quickly it should have been a joke, but you couldn’t wait to get surrounded by friends and you knew they wouldn’t mind seeing you arriving in comfy clothes and with a bare face. Your makeup had run during your day at the office and you couldn’t wait to get out of your freaking white button-down and heels. So you wrapped yourself in Charles’ too-big-for-you hoodie, took out your most comfortable pair of yoga pants and cleaned your face bare before leaving your flat with a tote bag full of fresh underwear and your travel toiletry bag. You knew you’d more than likely end up sleeping at Tom’s, sharing his king size bed like always.

The house was a giant mess as soon as you stepped a foot inside the hallway. There were yells, noises of automatic rifle weapons and very disgusting moans of zombies meeting their gruesome end. Needless to say, you didn’t last long in the living room, seeing how the twins and Tuwaine didn’t care whether or not you were there. They had barely answered your “hello” when you have passed the door of the room, so you didn’t feel guilty leaving them there with their gore game.

You found Tom in his office, his nose deep into a script, but you knew by the frown on his lips and the little crease between his brows, that he was having a hard time with it. You sighed with relief as you closed the door, though, muffling the sounds of the rest of them all, even though you hadn’t seen Harrison yet and weren’t exactly impatient to do so.

“Hey Tom,” You whispered, trying to keep his calm atmosphere intact.

“Hey, Peanut, how are you doing?” He smiled back, pushing his script back down on the desk and you returned the smile at the nickname you’ve sported for years.

“I’m okay,” You sighed. “How about you? Having trouble with your reading?”

“It’s just a bit denser than what I’m used to. They didn’t realise I needed the more spaced one, and I’ve been going at it for hours now.”

You’d been Tom’s friend for years, now. You knew him by heart and you’ve known him back when you were at school as well, before he got some home-school in the mix. One thing you knew about Tom was his struggles with dyslexia and how it could affect him sometimes, especially when he was reading something long. Over the time, he had found some tricks to make it easier: print bigger fonts, space the lines a bit more, sometimes he would alternate highlighted lines and blank ones. But at some point, he would just grow tired and frustrated, which you reckoned might be exactly what was happening right now.

“Give me that,” You softly said, grabbing the script and sitting down on his desk next to him. “Close your eyes, they’re tired.”

Tom groaned a little, showing his gratefulness through noises rather than words. You chuckled quietly and made sure you were ready for the next part, which involved Tom crossing his arms over your thighs and dropping his head on top of it all.

“Settled?”

He hummed and you checked where his reading had stopped. As much as you hated it, you knew it was easier for him to dog-ear the pages he had already read, so you picked up where he had left it and started reading to him, not asking any question about the plot, the characters’ growth or the different storylines. You knew it was best to let him absorb the text first, than in a couple of hours, when he’d have digested it, maybe you’d be able to ask a few things and brainstorm it over with him.

For now, you were just his personal audiobook and that was fine by you.

You read for about an hour before Sam came bursting into the office, telling you dinner was ready. He was red in the face, the kind of red you knew to be telling of a play fight with his twin, which didn’t miss the occasion to come barrelling into the room, yelling about how he was going to shave his head in his sleep for whatever reason. You had stopped trying to understand these two a long while ago. They kept bickering and teasing each other, it was a miracle one of them didn’t end up in the hospital with a fractured bone, again.

You sat at the table and properly greeted everyone with a quick hug, even though you purposefully avoided Harrison by grabbing the plate Harry was struggling to hold, to set it on the table.

Seeing Harrison again still stung. There was this awkwardness still lingering between you two, that you literally couldn’t shake. You were still mad at him, mad that he knew about your infatuation with him and didn’t do anything about it. You would have prefered to be friendzoned once and for all, rather than being gossiped about with his freaking girlfriend. You were so glad and relieved that she hadn’t been invited, to be honest.

“New hoodie, Peanut?” Tom inquired, pointing at your jumper.

“If so, we’re gonna have to explain sizes to you, Nuts,” Tuwaine teased.

“Ha. Ha. Very funny, dumbasses. It’s Charles’, he forgot it at home. I’m stealing it until I have to return it.”

“I still can’t believe you’re cosying it up with Charles freaking Leclerc,” Harry exclaimed. “Like. The dude is a literal God.”

“He’s not a God,” You giggled. “He’s a nice guy, who happens to be very interesting to look at.”

“Of course,” Harry rolled his eyes up. “Don’t get me wrong, I love you, Nuts, but you’re you and he’s a freaking Formula 1 driver.”

“Gee, thanks for the vote of confidence, my self-esteem really thrives with you all,” You groaned, grabbing the plate of green beans from the table. “May I remind you all that we have a literal superhero sitting at this table?”

“Touché,” Harry sighed.

“How’s it going with my boy Charles?” Tuwaine smiled.

“It’s going good,” You smiled. “I’m joining him in France next week.”

Tuwaine whistled lowly, impressed.

“So you’re fully dating him, then?” Tom wondered.

“I don’t know, we haven’t really discussed it yet,” You shrugged. “We’re just happy to spend time together, to be honest.”

“And you’re the only one he spends time with?” Harrison asked, his tone somewhat annoyed with the matter.

The silence that draped the table was enough to chill you down a bit. You repressed a shiver, thankful for the oversized hoodie to actually hide it and dropped a few green beans in your plate, trying to decipher if you had to ignore him or indulge his rude question.

How dare he imply that Charles wasn’t that interested in you? How dare he imply that you were one among several others?

You trusted what you had with Charles so much that you knew it wasn’t even a possibility, but just to be reasonable, you decided you would actually ask him next time you’d see him face to face.

“Dude, that is so rude,” Sam finally commented. “Leave her alone.”

“Ahem.. So. What are we watching tonight?” Tom defused the bomb.

“Anything but a romcom. I love you, Peanut, but I can’t do this anymore.”

“I’m not in the mood for a romcom,” You deadpanned. “Not anymore,” You added.

“There’s a thriller that just came out on Netflix, it looks okay-ish,” Harry suggested.

“Or we could watch another season of New Girl,” Tuwaine grinned.

Eventually, Tuwaine won, because you all loved New Girl and only watched it together. You had some serious catching up to do with Jess, Nick, Schmidt and Winston.

You piled onto the couches about an hour later. The living room was lit by a couple of candles and the whole room looked cosy and warm. Sam had made cookies and popcorn, so it smelled sweet, which really made you happy even though Harrison’s sour mood really didn’t help. He barely spoke during dinner and didn’t make any effort to even pretend that he wasn’t pissy about something, which annoyed you to no end. You were grateful for Tom and Tuwaine who decided to sit on each side of you and decided that you wouldn’t let Harrison ruin your night even more. You got rid of the pillows behind your back and nestled against Tuwaine, letting your calves rest on Tom’s thighs which he immediately took in his hands to rub them. This was one of the things you liked the most about movie nights: the fact that you and the boys had a comfortable friendship, comfortable enough that they could touch you and you’d be cool about it.

Halfway through the third episode, the pocket in Charles’ jumper vibrated enough to make a noise. You frowned and fished your phone out of it, grinning at the notification on your phone.

Charles Just so you know, I scored the fastest lap today.

You loved that he kept sending you texts like that, like little updates on his day to make you feel like you were there with him.

Did you drive around Fiorano, today?

He hadn’t talked about a track test, only some sessions in the sim, last time you spoke on the phone with him. But again, it was Formula 1, they could have had a change of plan or he could have not been told.

Charles Nope.

What are you talking about?

Charles I was the fastest one to go from the sim to the toilets and back! They said they had never seen someone so quick, ever!

You snorted at his latest text, which brought Tuwaine’s attention to your phone screen.

“Tell him I said hi,” He whispered.

“Get yourself your own cute guy,” You teased.

“Sorry but yours is the only cute guy I’ll ever be interested in.”

I’m proud of you, then! Congrats on this big achievement!! Tuwaine insists that I tell you he said hi.

Charles Ah, thank you, thank you! Gotta take the win when you can Tell him I said hi, too. Tell Tom I got his DM last weekend, it was nice of him to check on me after the race. I just realised I forgot to answer him, he must think I’m a complete jerk

You smiled at his words and presented your phone to Tom, which made him grin too.

No worries, he’s not mad, you must have been swamped with work, I’ve passed your message

Charles I was super busy, indeed, but I appreciated his DM anyway

Every day, you wondered how you had lucked up so much to get a sweet guy as Charles in your life, who liked your friends and felt comfortable with them already.

How’s the preparation for France going?

Charles It’s going okay, we’ll see how it goes on track. Can’t wait to have you back, though. The hotel they booked for us all is super nice, you’re gonna love it!

Isn’t the track super close to Monaco?

Charles Not really, we’re like two hours and half away. It’s not really worth it to go back and forth. I could take the jet, but I’d rather not deal with the fatigue of it all.

Got it! Then I can’t wait to have you back too

“What did she just say?” You frowned at the screen, having caught only the end of the sentence Jess had just thrown at Nick.

“That she liked when he called her “Bitch” because it made her feel like Janice Joplin,” Harry repeated, making Harrison huff.

“Can we please listen?” He groaned.

“Sorry,” Harry whispered.

Your phone vibrated on your lap again, making you smile.

Charles Well good thing is, I’m super fast on the way to the toilets, already!

You pushed your phone back to your lap, focusing on the TV again. Nick and Jess were in the middle of a grocery store of some sort and she was about to either go full Jess again or you had missed an important plot line again.

“I’m so confused, why is she freaking out over his shoes?”

“Because she’s trying to see if his feet are always facing her or if they’re facing something else,” Tom explained.

“And it’s important because?”

“Apparently if your feet always face someone, it’s because you love them.”

“Gotcha,” You nodded.

“Seriously, I can’t hear what’s going on,” Harrison groaned again.

You rolled your eyes at him, grateful that you were hidden by Tuwaine so he couldn’t see you.

At some point, your phone started to buzz continuously, which meant someone was calling you. You quickly excused yourself and told the boys to keep watching so they wouldn’t have to wait for you and you locked yourself in Tom’s office, accepting the FaceTime call.

“Hi,” You smiled at the screen.

“Hi,” Charles grinned back.

“How are you doing?”

“I’m a bit tired, not gonna lie. Racing to the toilets is exhausting,” He joked. “How about you?”

“I’m okay, don’t worry about me.”

“Texting is nice but I wanted to see your face,” Charles sheepishly told you.

“Well, now you do,” You blushed.

“Is that my hoodie?” Charles smirked.

“It might be, yep,” You blushed even deeper. “It’s super comfortable,” You explained.

“You look extra cute in it.”

It’s not like you could do anything but feel your cheeks flaming up once again, or more exactly, going a few degrees hotter.

A few seconds of silence occured in the conversation, a little breath of relief about seeing each other after a few days of work, of loneliness and fatigue. You both had worked really hard this past week and you were just relieved of having a small break in the form of the other.

During those small seconds of silence, you detailed Charles’ face through the screen. His stubble was getting a bit crazy but you liked it either way. A set of dark rings were hanging under his eyes and your heart clenched a little, knowing he was surely exhausted but still chose to call you either way. They were paired with small lines on each corner of said eyes, a true sign that he was happy about your call.

“Where are you?” You smiled.

“Physically or mentally?” He joked.

“Both.”

“Well, physically, I’m still in Italy. Ferrari has a couple of places where we can crash when we come to the factory, so I’m in one of those apartments. Mentally, I’m in London,” He shrugged, a small pink hue rising up his throat.

“How’s your view?”

“From the window, it looks a bit boring,” He demonstrated, bringing you to the window that overlooked a few streets. “On my phone, though..”

“Stop,” You giggled.

“You’re gonna love the South of France, it’s super pretty. Prettier than this, at least.”

“Are we even gonna be able to sightsee? I’m coming on Friday night and leaving on Sunday evening.. I’m not sure we’ll have enough time,” You grimaced.

“Not sure, but you’ll see a bit when we’ll drive from the hotel to the track, at least. Sorry about that,” He frowned.

“I don’t care, I only care about spending time with you.”

“Well, my company is exquisite, I’ve been told,” He teased.

“That it is,” You grinned.

“And you, where are you? I don’t recognise your background.”

“I’m in Tom’s office, I was spending the evening with the guys. It’s movie night,” You shrugged.

“And you’re in here, talking to me? Jeez, I’m sorry for keeping you away from your friends!”

“It’s okay, they’re still watching, I’ll catch up on what I missed.”

“Still, we should hang up. I’ll call you back tomorrow,” He suggested

“Can’t wait.”

“Hey.. I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Charles,” You laughed. “See you tomorrow.”

You sneaked back into the living room, ignoring the huff of annoyance from Harrison. You had no idea what was up his ass tonight but he was starting to piss you off as well.

At some point, you leaned against Tom, Tuwaine having wrapped himself in a blanket, you knew he might groan about you keeping him too warm. Tom draped an arm around your shoulders, dropped a kiss on the top of your head and you snuggled against your best friend, happy that you could get your dose of cuddles even if Charles wasn’t here. You weren’t exactly touch-depraved, but sometimes it was nice to be hugged.

“What’s going on?” You whispered to Tom.

“You’d know if you weren’t texting non-stop or leaving to call,” Harrison groaned.

“Jeez, sorry Dad, didn’t know you were suddenly the one deciding on the rules of movie night,” You threw back.

“Honestly, I don’t know why you came here, if all you do is text a guy you barely know, talk about him on a loop and spend time with him instead of us.”

“Excuse me?” You choked up.

“You heard me well enough.”

Your ears were starting to burn, which was generally not a good sign. And judging by the fact that Tom’s hands were suddenly gripping your calves instead of massaging them like they were doing before, you realised that everyone in the room was holding their breath.

What the fuck was Harrison doing?

Deep into the episode that kept playing even though nobody was paying attention to it anymore, he looked like a proper asshole who didn’t even care about the impact of his words, except for the fact that his jaw was clenching hard, a telltale of his annoyance much like your burning ears right now.

“You know, if you didn’t want to see me, you only had to not invite me,” You clapped back.

“I didn’t invite you. They did,” He pointed to the twins.

“I see. Well sorry I bothered you with my mere presence.”

“What presence? You’re barely here. If you wanted to spend time with that guy, maybe don’t do it here where you’re annoying everyone with the vibrations of your phone or taking his calls.”

“I won’t bother you much longer,” You sassed back, stood back up, making a beeline for your tote bag that you had left hanging on the back of a chair.

“Peanut, no,” Tom tried to intervene. “Don’t go, this is silly.”

“This is not. I know when to leave when I’m no longer welcome.”

“I wanted to spend the evening with you,” Tom tried to convince you to stay. “We could go back to my office and read that script again?”

“Tom, I love you to bits, but I think I’d rather go home right now.”

Tom sadly nodded, before the twins put the episode in pause.

“Don’t stop on my account. I’d hate for Harrison to lose out on the opportunity to blissfully spend the evening not in my company.”

“That’s dumb, we watch the show together or we don’t.”

“You’re together. Have fun,” You stated, leaving the living room.

“We’re not together if you’re not here,” Tuwaine yelled as you closed the front door.

You had no idea how you managed to keep your tears away until you closed the door of your flat behind your back. Your flat was cold, dark and smelled like the leftover fish and chips you had the evening before. It was silent and lonely, which truly ended up chipping at your morale.

It wasn’t even the fact that the situation had been ridiculous. You had fought with the boys before and you had had your fair share of words that truly went beyond what they meant. Sometimes, they were truly mean. Sometimes, the fights were extremely frustrating. It wasn’t about what had been said because rude words you could deal with.

It was the fact that they came from Harrison, who was mad that you had finally someone treating you right in your love life. It was the fact that he could see how happy you were and still decided to fuck with it, for whatever reason. It was the fact that he willingly chased you away because he was mad.

For the first time, you wondered how your friendship with Harrison was going to survive all of this.

A few weeks ago, you would have thought that if it came to a choice between the boy you liked and Harrison, the answer was easy and not even worth a second of reflection.

That night, you weren’t sure Harrison was the right choice anymore. Nor if he would ever be again.

You sobbed the entire night.

part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - part 4 - part 5 - part 6 - part 7 - part 8

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