#i am forgetting something major

[egophiliac]

please i would like to know more knitting headcanons if you have them. i love the most wholesome cozy headcanons out there

this got SO away from me, I'm so sorry, it started as "here is some needlework-related headcanon" and then I just lost my entire mind and it turned into "here are Scenarios about characters doing crafts". I…wasn't kidding about dedicating large amounts of time thinking about characters making things out of yarn.

it's not quite a fanfic but, uhhh, take it about as seriously as you take my comics, I guess. :') we're all just having fun here!

the closest Grim has gotten to knitting is the time he ate half a skein of yarn because it "looked spicy". (that was not a fun day for Yuu or the Ramshackle bathroom.) the ghosts, meanwhile, have canonically have made clothes for Yuu and Grim and, honestly, they're probably their own little knitting club (and Yuu's self-appointed eccentric granduncles). you know they're loving having an actual person to play dress-up make things for. we shall be well-prepared for any more impromptu Tsunotarou snowstorms.

Riddle, Trey, and Jamil all know the basics of sewing, but don't do any needling beyond mending/darning/general upkeep. they're all annoyingly practical. (Najma is also annoyingly practical, but she's more fashion-forward about it than Jamil. she's probably really into visible mending.)

Ruggie and Epel probably do know how to knit, in addition to those basics, but to them it's more of a utilitarian thing (need a new warm hat for the winter!) than something they do for fun. on that note, I think Epel wouldn't really have a complex about knitting -- partly because it IS a practical skill to have for those Harveston winters, and partly because he would have learned from Marja, and no one would dare imply Marja is anything less than absolutely badass.

meanwhile Ruggie is over here gleefully unravelling Leona's old sweaters so he can make himself a cashmere hat. it'sfreeyarn.jpg

Jack crochets little cozies and accessories for his cactus. he makes seasonal and holiday-themed versions with cute little sewn-on buttons and, you know what, now I need to draw event outfits for a cactus. hold on.

Deuce's mom definitely knits. he might've learned the basics from her when he was little, but never used them until recently, when he's been trying to pick it back up in order to make her a gift. (there's probably a heartwarming story in there about a special scarf or something that she made him that he's trying to replicate for her.) he's been at it for literally months now because he keeps screwing up his math and Riddle has to help him fix it.

Ace doesn't do any needlecraft, and razzed Deuce about it for a while until he found out the reason he was so Determined is because it's for his mom (and also the heartwarming story about the special scarf or whatever). so then he felt kind of guilty, and since he'd rather die than admit it, resolved to just never mention it again. except Deuce is so hilariously inept that not making fun of him is really, really hard. so Ace is just sitting there having a personal crisis every time Deuce whips out his needles and adorable little yarn basket. his life is so difficult. :(

Cater bought an amigurumi kit once when they were The Thing on Magicam. he made a few hedgehogs, took pictures, then gave them away to his friends and hasn't thought about them since. (Riddle was so moved by the gift that he forgot to yell at the first-years for a whole day. his hedgehog has a place of honor on his desk.)

Leona has never touched a needle in his life, and would be insulted if you implied he might enjoy expending a small amount of energy over anything he doesn't have to.

Kalim has touched a needle, once, when he tried to help mend something. he was so atrocious at it that Jamil forbade him from ever touching one again. if he started knitting it would probably give Jamil heart problems.

Azul strikes me as being someone who always has to be doing something. but he also doesn't like the inefficiency of spending so much time and effort without much return (personal satisfaction doesn't count). so I think he doesn't really do any crafting outside of whatever's necessary for whatever bit he's running at the moment…though maybe there's a tasteful stitched sampler or two hanging on a wall in Mostro. just because.

Jade is a little more crafty (ho ho, puns) outside of Schemes. by which I mean he exclusively makes mushroom-related decor and insists on hanging it up in Mostro. (Azul keeps asking him to stop. Jade pretends not to hear.)

Floyd once knit most of a densely-cabled fisherman's sweater in half a day. he got within 200 stitches of finishing before he got bored and never got back to it.

Vil probably, like…spent a week making a pair of cute mitts or something, and was really proud of them! then Neige made the mistake of getting super excited and trying to bond over it, and inadvertently soured Vil on knitting forever.

Rook I genuinely believe is both capable of doing everything, and also actively involved in using those skills at any given time. he could make an offhand remark about how he's been needlefelting tiny petals to stitch together into an elaborate rose-themed bodysuit and I would just be like "yep, that tracks."

he could also mention that he just put the finishing touches on the statue of Neige made out of hair that he keeps in the Hey Arnold-style shrine in his closet, and I would still be like "yep, that tracks".

I don't think Idia knits, but he might have bit of theoretical interest in it because of the relationship between knitting and binary? he probably spent a while trying to figure out if he could somehow make a playable version of Doom on a sweater. (it's magic, so yes. he doesn't want to actually have to make the sweater though.)

Ortho once made a hat and some mittens for Idia. it might be cold when they finally go to the park. :)

Malleus has a tapestry that's been his quick breather project for the last 400 years. he was vexed when he ran out of a color that hasn't been produced since the plant the dye came from went extinct a century ago. >:( the new flosses just aren't the same.

Sebek has tried embroidery in order to feel closer to ~wakasama~ but he doesn't have the patience for it. he's trying, though! his daisies are barely lazy at all these days! (he would probably actually be really good at knitting, since a lot of it is just…following instructions and doing math. since his main point of reference right now is Lilia, he hasn't figured this out.)

Lilia knits poorly and with much gusto. gauge? never heard of her. tension? this is supposed to be a relaxing hobby! it's unclear if he knows how bad he is, or if he's deliberately trying to see how embarrassing he can get before the others stop wearing the things he makes them. (they never will.) either way, he's having fun!

Silver was a self-sufficient little homestead boy by the time he was twelve, so of course he knows all the fun things you can do with wool (fortunately he learned how to knit before Lilia had a chance to ruin him) (idk, a friendly squirrel taught him or something, he's a literal disney princess his life is like that). he has a unique talent for being able to sit there asleep and somehow still spin perfectly consistent yarn.

look, I just want Silver to use a spinning wheel, c'mon

Neige and Silver both make tiny sweaters for orphaned baby animals. Neige's are more skilled (they have colorwork and little seed buttons) but Silver's are softer, since they're made from the wool that his forest bunny friends gather for him and donate to the cause. (Ace heard him mention this once and had to go have another personal crisis over it.)

this also ties into another absolutely unfounded headcanon I have about Silver and Neige being friends with the same bluebird family that alternates island sides for breakfast and dinner. there isn't any more to it, I just think it'd be cute. 🐦

orphan baby animals aside, Neige absolutely 1000% knits and you'll never convince me otherwise. he made that sweater. he made Snick's scarf. if you spend too long around him he'll have already started making you a cardigan in your favorite color. the dwarves don't knit because they don't have to. (wait, no, Timmy probably does -- you never actually see him do it, but every once in a while there's a new aggressively cute potholder added to the collection. Toby has tried, but he is physically incapable of not dropping stitches everywhere and ending up with a sad little pile of yarn.)

Che'nya says he does yarn sculpture, but really he's just batting the yarn balls around and leaving them for someone else to clean up.

Rollo does enormous cross-stitch recreations of illuminated manuscripts on 60-count linen (over one, of course). he will lecture you for two hours on how much he does not enjoy doing it and how that makes him better than you.

Mickey doesn't (I SAID EVERYONE). I'm sure his girlfriend knits though.

Crowley enters stitching competitions at the local fair. his depictions of handsome-looking ravens in top hats do better than you'd think, but he still keeps losing to goddamn Ambrose with his perfect backs and railroaded stitches and no hoop marks and…

resisting the urge to say that Crewel does crewel. failing.

…okay, but look, he does fashion design in canon, it MAKES SENSE --

Trein is a Good Cat Owner, so (after carefully researching durable and pet-safe materials) he crochets little mice with catnip inside. he gets a deep sense of satisfaction at seeing them get torn to shreds. :)

Sam doesn't partake himself, but he does have weirdly intricate knowledge of every potential needlecrafting technique and the associated tools -- which he just so happens to have in stock now!

like Rook, I do believe that Sam just…knows everything, through his "friends" or otherwise. he could start spouting details about the historic production of goldwork thread, and as long as he then offers to sell something to us while shouting gratuitous English, it would feel perfectly in-character.

you wouldn't think Vargas would be into crafting, but he did spend a week painstakingly painting antlers onto a hoodie for his deer cosplay. magic? pah! he didn't get these muscles by NOT smearing craft-store fabric paint everywhere BY HAND.

(this is also why Crewel agreed to wear the…thing…that Vargas made for his turn at being camp monster. he actually spent time and effort on it and the whole idea was giving Crewel his own personal crisis.)

this got so far away from me, I am so, so sorry

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #there's probably some in there somewhere? i forget what has and hasn't gotten to eng yet #long post #...again i am so sorry #i THINK i got everyone. there's probably some major character i somehow managed to embarrassingly forget about. oh god #(the mirror is exempted on account of not having hands) #disclaimer that i try to keep up with canon but i do sometimes miss or forget things #so if something contradicts canon that's just me being a doofus #i mean this is 100% me just making things up anyway so take it as you will #i am not in a right state of mind right now

[boxwinebaddie]

is fingerbang in rm?

oooooh...iiiiinteresting.

but i'm gonna say no. :/

i Wish i could put them in rm because that would be so iconic, but there's just too much crossover with the characters; i wouldn't know how to work it into the story with everything going on already.

however! i will raise you this:

so back in the stone ages when i used to run the BWB twitter, i came across a post that you might remember me retweeting/replying to a tweet with a picture of fingerbang kyle and regular stan in it.

at the top of the post, someone retweeted it saying something to the effect of 'ugh, i hate celebrity x fan plots, so boring lol' and maybe it's petty but that made me heeeellla overprotective and Viciously Angry bc that's the plot premise of my entire fanfic and i literally don't think it's boring at all??? yes, i'm insane.

that pissed me off, lmao.

but anyways i was looking at that picture of finger bang kyle and regular boy stan and was like...oh my god it's just rm in reverse???

so here's my pitch for the reverse remember au fic aka...

forget?

shdlkshdlkah

so i think that the plot premise or chapter one would hinge on the fact that it is shelley's birthday. and for shelley's birthday, she and her friend got two tickets to go see finger bang live and in concert, world famous boy band, like one direction, beatle-mania level famous.

buuuuuut her friend backs out at the last minute, so she's left with this extra ticket and that girl was her ride so she basically can't go.

let's leave that off to the side for a moment though, so i can tell you a little about what i think forget au stan marsh would be like...

who i think...

is an absolute fucking LOSER.

like i am talking major loner-stoner energies, has literally one friend and i think its butters who is also his roommate, never goes outside, literally just holes up in his room playing his guitar, writes a bunch of really dark edgelordy songs no one will ever hear — they are actually quite good, but again, sort of political and bleak and beat-poetic, is a serious music snob, like really really fucking annoying about music...might bring him working at vinyl tap back, but i also support city wok delivery boy stan, basically only goes outside to barely pay attention in class ( he's a music major at cu denver ), go to work so that he can buy more pizza, beer, video games and i think he's saving up for a really fancy guitar or to see shows which are his safe place.

i predict that he probably is still bleach blonde stan, i maintain that he can still be half mexican like ravenstan, could be really cute if he brushed his hair and stopped slouching, vegetarian, wears the same beanie from high school, rotates the same like four or five tee shirts which are all covered in stains, full of holes, etc. most of them are band shirts or 100% hemp tegridy farms work shirts from when he was working there in high school which he barely got through, btw, cs get degrees, probably wears the iconic stan leather jacket that is obnoxiously covered in pins, big baggy jeans, like, huge, and ofc, the stan marsh combat boots bc he's an midwest emo king.

i assume he has all the stan piercings, certainly the nose one...should i give him the ravenstan lip piercing for shits and gigs? some tattoos?

but yeah, i love him but he's pathetic. he has like zero social skills. he had one girlfriend and it was wendy and they broke up a million times because he kept accidentally fucking up by boyfailing too hard. bi but i don't think he really knows that. like i feel like he has some bi panic moments but he kind of just takes a shot and swallows those down and tries not to think about it so stan probably thinks he's straight.

interesting.

anyways! stan is gearing up to go to this gigantic metal festival that he's ben waiting for..Forever but then gets a call from his mom who is like "stanley marsh, it is your SISTER'S BIRTHDAY! you are driving her to this concert and that is final!" he complains soooooo much like shelley why are you fucking ruining my life to go see gay one direction????? holy shit???? i hate my life????

but the hotel room(s) are already paid for and stan has the tegridy farms family truck ( riley made me moderately obsessed with little beat up pick up truck farm boy stan i love him ) aka weed for speed aka mary jane ( she is stan's baby ) so he picks shelley up who tries to play finger bang the whole way there but stan is a snob and he is like i am driving i am picking the music, but shelley and him keep fightng and probably break the radio and they have to sit in silence hdlksah, the whole time shelley is going on and on and ON about finger bang and how obsessed she is specifically with kyle, who stan doesn't know much about other than the fact that he is little and ginger?

sigh we can have tall boyfail loser midwest emo weed farm skater boy stan and short cute fresh faced world famous popstar kyle as a treat, you are welcome to everyone, but mostly riley.

also because i gave jersey an accent, i mean, i don't think forget finger bang stan has a super strong accent but there's probably a little twang there just from being all the way out there in super hick nowheresville rural colorado, it kind of embarasses him so he doesn't talk much or very loudly at all, might have a slight stammer?

idk i love him he's a qt. <3

anyways they get there and it is PACKED!!!!! it is literally hell, stan is so overstimulated holy shit, like forget ( why am i calling it that like that is so fucking funny ) stan is so introverted, he is not vibing. also because it's all mostly screaming girls with signs and stuff, shelley is one of them, she is holding up this really obnoxious one that says 'DEFILE ME, KYLE' on it like gOOOOOOD.

he's in hell fr fr fr.

but it gets worse because right before they are about to get in, this group of rabid fans runs by and one of them knocks her red sugary drink all over stan and completely douses his shirt. he's ready to die. the hotel is too far away, so he has to go into the stadium store and buy something to wear but sigh...the only option...

is black tee-shirt with the words FINGERBANG ME <3 in a big pink glittery font...but sigh...*raven vc* at least it's black. he has no choice but to buy it rip the guitar fund.

he goes back in with shelley and the finger bang boys come out i think its cartman, kenny, kyle and wendy but...wendyl? might be kinda spicy if stan's ex-boyfriend was in fb, also bc that makes him confused about his sexuality...nina rm/fb trans rights, baby!

stan hates everything about their upbeat, capitalistic, commercialist vibe, all of it is really obnoxious bubble gum pop stuff meant to be peddled to teenage girls, its almost propaganda and makes stan sick.

which, speaking of, the songs are bad, but the singing, he's realizing, is actually quite good, particularly the singing done by the little ginger finger bang boy who shelley is obsessed with who...for some reason stan really cannot take his eyes off of. he also thinks he might be crazy but he swears they accidentally locked eyes a couple times, which meant stan had to take a swig of flask he stashed in his jacket.

but i'm gonna finish this post out with a bang or, rather, a finger bang if you will, because i think ala the virigin sacrifice schtick in rm, they probably single some audience members out...

shelley picks the extremely oppurtune moment before that happens to use the restroom and basically pawns her gigantic DEFILE ME KYLE SIGN off on him, so he's just holding this kyle sign and the FINGER BANG ME teeshirt so naturally, fingerbang kyle thinks he's a fan, gets really close to him, winks, steals his beanie, replaces it with his white, blingy, fluffy ushanka and says

"Hey Cutie,

Wanna Get Finger Banged?" <3 ;) xxx

LKHDSLKSHLKHSLKHD I CAN JUST SEE RURAL BOY MIDWEST EMO STAN HEAVY BREATHING HAVING A BI PANIC ATTACK LIKE OHHHH GOD OH GOD LITERALLY CANT SPEAK FEELS LIKE HES GONNA THROW UP FB!KYLE RIZZ IS WAY TOO STRONG HELP

anyways...Scene.

this was so funny to me. like obviously it's not a real thing or anything but it was interesting to imagine an alternative world where finger bang is the famous band and kyle is the big celebrity, not stan. i think maybe they're looking for a 5th member and butters joins the band??? also maybe style have some secret red string of fate tying them together that neither of them know abt?

live, laugh, fingerbang.

uncle nina, celebrity x fan enthusiast

#this was so funny to me i don't know what the hell this is #but it made me laugh so there #finger ban(d) supremacy baby! #this kind of thrilled me so u can ask me silly questions about the fake forget fingerband universe if you want #i am a little obsessed with lanky introverted mid west emo music snob music major rural colorado weed farm boy stan #and tiny bubblegum pop boy next door super cheeky flirty it boy golden boy kyle who probably has a lot of demons and #idk i get the feeling he's got some sort of secret addiction or really dark past...something i think fb stan can sense in his aura #do i give fb stan the stan-a-thesia #idk but he can tell that hes putting on some kind of act #something about maybe having wendy become wendyl #and end up in fingerbang just seems dramatic and interesting to me and really explores sexuality and gender identity #fb stan is repressed that whole fanfic by the way holy shit #i guess its enemies to lovers again #i love drama #i feel like butters is butters and not marjorine #but maybe also transitions through my fake fic #why do i kind of like midwest emo stans twang deep country backwoods colorado accent and his awkward stammer #kyles voice is beautiful by the way he also can do ballet <333 #he is very cute stan is sick all the time its so bad #OKAY IM DONE ARE WE OBSESSED #oh god what if i had finger bang order city wok #and stan deliver it oh my god #luv my fake fic #where is the prissy preppy rich boy kyle visits tegridy farms and has a paris hilton simple life moment and gets chased by the farm animals #and doesnt know how to milk cows or shuck corn or anything and stan driving the tractor and pitching bails of hay shirtless #that is the content i want to see

[sail-not-drift]

Sebastian Stan in CATWS, conveying the weight of Bucky’s entire tragedy in 13 minutes of screen time :

#Bucky Barnes #CATWS #Sebastian Stan #MCU #every time I see a gif of his face in that movie I see something different #the world forgetting; by the world forgot #having a minor breakdown over Bucky Barnes; it’s fine #and the majority of those 13 minutes are action sequences; during some of which he’s wearing a full face mask!!! #he is terrible!!!! #can someone please cast him in a prestige television show I am begging you!!!! #I want soft focus closeups!!! I want existential agony!!! I want questions of death and the universe!!! #I want unreliable narrator!!! I want crushing grief!!! I want exhaultant joy!!! #I want Emmy nominations for roles where he isn’t playing a sentient bag of rotting ducks!!! #* dicks #I’d love to see him pull off a bag of rotting ducks #ANYWAY

[onewholivesinloops]

i love not remembering anything about my life. i only came into existence two years ago. everything before that was a long dream and even now i remain in a fugue state.

#i can probably explain the timeline and major events that happened #but if you ask me for any specifics about anything bar a couple things i literally wouldn't be able to tell you a thing #i vividly remember most bad things that happened but my definition of 'vivid' is still vague recollections relative to everything else #it feels like this isn't a body that belongs to me and it was inhabited by a different person all those years LOL #my memory 'issues' bother me bc it always feels like a memory is nagging at me in the back of my head #so is there something important i'm subconsciously trying to forget or is this my paranoia bc i can't remember stuff (we will never know) #anyway i'm lying down in the dark at 6 am muttering 'i'm so girlpilled traumacore for this <3' to myself as i type this #gamo.txt

[ferdydurke]

I say this often but its crazy how much of a vortex depression is.

#I dont feel like... safe or particularly fulfilled rn and i have major major mood swings at least once a week but its not like. #Bleak as fuck. I think the language of 'the world is without colour' never does it for me bc thats how id describe it when im out of it #but when im depressed my main feeling is that i am a person that was born without a soul whose main purpose in life is to kill myself #because i cant bear to do or think anything else. And like even talking about it while in that mental state feels incredibely like. #Like youre doing something disgusting because its a cry for attention or for help so you have to put it in a way that makes it clear that #you are not trying to escape your destiny by trying to convince someone you are worthy of living. #And then like. At some point you stop feeling like that and you forget about it... #until youre there again. and you forget what its like to not be in it. its crazyyyy to me its just crazy #barking #ultimately im very lucky. #Because i really dont believe you can just will yourself out of that hole i really think the enviroment is like 99% of it #and well i will prolly end up in that hole again maybe even this year. but maybe ill have something to pull me out #some ability to change the thing thats making me feel like that #and idk its so like. awful that that isnt always the case. sometimes youre just drowning in it and theres nothing #just my late night thoughts thats why i need that weed bad man

[nthflower]

Sometimes Christians acts like they are the only one that's allowed to be traumatised by their religion and who can hate and mock it. Like all other religions are pure innocent peaceful ways and opressed but Christianity is okay to mock because ughhh. Like only they are allowed to be traumatised and victim there.

But also when I say this then some extremely angry ex-muslims and islamaphobics comes and use this to spread hate about Muslim people which is also ughhh.

Like your average Muslim have zero differences than your average Christian why can't you treat them same.

#sorry so sorry i am ranting i can delete this later #this is not something philosophical or something smart i am just kimda angry #like yeah tolerance amd acceptance yay but you are still am other amd i don't care about your opinions #then bad side of islam uses this tolerance as their tool pf oppression #sorry i can't explain what i try to say here well #but as an ex-muslim immigrant who raised in a majority muslim country and was not a minority #it has layers please dont speak for me. even you wanna support or not #rant #this isn't about only online spaces this is about something from real life #people can be opressors.amd opressed at the same time it doesn't cancel each other #i am treated as now sometimes no wrong doer poor minority middle eastern person while bitch i was privileged #amd when i say this than it's turn into hate and they forget this also npt means i am struggling more than them in life now because #i am not privileged here anymore and minority #like situation and context matters #idk #again sorry i am just rambling

[the-way-astray]

it should be a crime for writers/creators to not make a crazy wall for their story that connects pictures representing the characters and plot points together with an obscene amount of yarn.

#i'm joking but like am i wrong #yes this is about kotlc #but it's also about other things #kotlc #i feel like so many stories would be better if authors or creators did this more i mean this with 100% seriousness #each character arc and plot line would come to a satisfying conclusion if creators did this more #because there would be a way to track every single thing that happens in the series and they wouldn't randomly forget things #it would also keep the cast of characters and the amount of plot points from getting too large for the author to handle #if there's too many things (characters/plot lines) on the wall for YOU to work with then there's too many things for the AUDIENCE too #sometimes limits are a good thing #making a crazy wall about a story in the making is a fun visual way to create those limits for yourself and keep track of stuff easily #it's also good for planning future events/characters/major plot points and then helping to connect them to past ones #a story should be about CONNECTION. everything should be CONNECTED to something else somehow. that's why these sorts of walls are so godly #yeah it's work but creating a whole-ass story is work regardless might as well make it fun for yourself and satisfying for the audience #also yes this is inspired by jenny nicholson and mike's mic thank you for asking

[villainanders]

seeing mass effect 2 came out just about a year before da2 is explaining a lot to me bc 1) even tho me2 seems to be a more thought out game than da2 in just about every regard it seems like there's a lot similar stylistic impulses going on 2) bioware was REALLY into 9/11 during this timeframe apparently. i don't know what was going on over there nearly 10 years after the event that made them feel like it was finally time to start dropping their 9/11 political commentary but it was happening i guess

#i mean obviously. very important event that had and continues to have major consequences in many areas of life across the world #but in my complete lack of education in the specifics i do wonder what was going on then #kind of wonder if this is a first term obama presidency thing? (i know bioware is Canadian) #like we are far out enough from the event and there is some hope what the us will start pulling back at this point #that we start getting more critical of the initial american response? #as much as neither game is particularly inspired in this regard and da2 in particular has a lot of latent islamophobia #both games are trying to be critical of conservative islamophobia and nationalism #da2 definitely thinks its being Super Fucking Nuanced (i am not far enough into me2 to know where its whole patriot act in space plotline #goes beyond just noticing that its a thing they're doing) anyway idk if any of this is true or if I'm forgetting something major going on #at the time that these games are clearly responding to so if anyone knows more i would be very currious #ask to tag

[nnausicaaa]

People are defending this saying "yeah its fucked up, thats whats awesome!" But like... what fucked up parts? I don't remember every detail of the book so maybe I'm forgetting stuff but I don't remember it being like an intensely fucked up book, like it was very within the realm of stuff I've read before

The only part that shocked me was the amount of incest, like it was constant in every generation and a weirdly prominent theme of the book, but that doesn't seem like what this person is talking about. And even that is a pretty common topic in a lot of literature

"This kind of suffering"????? There was war and illness and death, but those are normal things to write about and they happen in real life what are you talking about

#seriously am i forgetting something major about the book?? #my posts #one hundred years of solitude

[asteralien]

hmmmmm don't think i'm doing as good as i thought i was

#every once in a while i am re-struck with the fact that my therapist diagnosed me with major depression #you'd think you wouldn't forget that you have major depression and yet #its like if i can get out of bed in the morning it's not depression and i can get out of bed in the morning #forgetting that i haven't been getting out of bed in the morning until five minutes past the last minute #anyway i'm very sorry for the human being that i am being right now i'm clutching the bits of my brain that i can reach #and trying to smush them back together into something that functions #sorry to quote this guy but like genuinely i also dont want me to be doing what i'm doing #mythtakes

[nykloss]

Crowning achievements so far for being Cringe in final assignments during my college career: writing drill for a Homestuck song arranged for marching band, submitting fake anime Homestuck screenshots for my art final, lemon demon brass quintet arrangement, writing a final paper on juggalo culture, singing an adventure time song for my voice jury

#to be cringe js to be free #honestly this is my tip for surviving college: cater any free choice assignment you have to something you love #so what if its cringe #youre going to learn more if its something you care about and you will remember vs if its something forgetable thag you hate #who cares if my marching band show features homestuck music vs generic pop tunes!! Its the same asaignment either way #i am one of like 7 people in my major who made it this far out of like 20-30 of us who started so who cares how I got here! #nyklos is typing

[ectogeranium]

I’m gonna be 1000% real with you all this evening. My memory is absolute shit. It is so bad, that I have entered thembo stages of stupid, and I mean that with complete sincerity.

It is.. terrifying. And I’m really trying to deflect with humor, but the fact is, I’m losing more each day. I’ve lost so much from the past years, where I used to be as sharp as a damn tack.

Call it age, and getting older, but I’m 20. I shouldn’t be losing this much this fast.

It worries me. My parents think I’m joking or talking about someone else when I bring up my memory loss to them. I usually drop the subject after they deflect.

I haven’t voiced my concerns to anyone else until now, since I’m writing this.

If we ever talk, and I forget something, I am so so sorry, and I know how it feels to be on the receiving end of an “I forgot about that” text. It sucks. I didn’t want to forget, it just.. happened. So if I ever do that to any of you, I’m being up front and telling you right now that my memory is awful, and it will lapse.

Idk dude.

#like literally if you tell me something.. I say ‘uh huh’ or ‘yeah’ in response.. I am BEGGING you not to ask me ‘ #’what did I just say?’ because it will make me instantly forget whatever it was you just to #ld me. #it’s the little things. I remember major things #and ‘important’ things.. but the little small stuff? like my best friend’s favorite color? what the numerical date is? #LOL you’re better off asking my best friend herself and looking at a calendar than asking me #memory loss and Alzheimer’s runs on my mom’s side of the family #my dad also suffers memory loss but he had a brain injury so it’s not genetic #I can’t even talk about my favorite shows or games with anyone anymore for fear of getting something wrong about it #it’s.. rough. #I’d like to pursue a medical diagnosis to see if it’s.. that #it could be the other undiagnosed things that are wrong with me that could be affecting my memory #this sucks. #sorry for venting but I feel more comfortable sharing this here than with anyone I know irl. sad honestly.

[cyanopicas]

re: the gog/ultk. au, how did you decide to make the great tree hell? specifically curious cause the great tree is regarded as a haven of sorts, very un-hell-like yknow?

the two worlds don't mesh together *super* well- imo at least - so details won't translate perfectly and i'm changing a few things to fit better. the way i'm thinking of it is the story of ultrakill within the world of ga'hoole. i've been disregarding certain aspects of the gog canon because besides for the middle kingdoms (which i honestly think are closer to heaven than they are hell), there isn't really another society in the books that sort of Just Exists. the pure ones, for example, are a military group with express purposes and goals.

that being said, if you have alternative ideas i'm totally open to hearing them!!

#it's been a tiny bit since i've read ga'hoole #so there could totally be something i'm forgetting #but i am trying to keep this contained to mostly major factions

[angelkittycore]

if someone isn't posting and isn't responding to you then its quite obvious they haven't seen your messages, probably because they're afk and/or asleep?

#i got accused of disrespecting a narcissist because i was asleep when they decided to yell at me for saying their post sucked #the post in question was the one about how getting revenge against your abuser is continuing the cycle of abuse #mutual abuse is a myth #you cannot abuse your abuser back because the majority of abuse is an imbalance of power at its core #not every survivor copes the way you do by forgiving and/or forgetting or letting go of their anger #i cannot speak for anybody but myself but reclaiming my anger is a huge part of my healing process #because i was groomed to think it was a toxic emotion and that it would make people be right about me if i were to show it #continuing the cycle of abuse is about how the abused become abusers with others #especially with their own kids #it's not about flipping the dynamic between the victim and the abuser already involved #this kind of mindset is toxic positivity and toxic recovery #now i'm not saying people should go out of their way out there and start actually hurting the abuser how they were hurt #but i am saying that if people happen to do that then i honestly don't care and i think it's deserved #anyway this was a fun way to wake up and get online /s #i am not responsible for your impatience im sorry but im just not #thats a thing you have to work on for yourself and you need to stop doing that #i understand it might trigger rsd to hear something like that because i know it did in me when i was younger but its the truth #you cant keep trying to hurt people because you thought they were ignoring you when they werent #anyway sometimes your posts just suck because they genuinely suck and not because you worded things wrong #your edited post still sucks because its still implying that getting revenge is abusive #its not lol. #let survivors cope and heal the way they think is best for them

[bigendershadowthehedghog]

memory loss is so awkward someone will be like I'm still mad at you from The Argument. btw. and I don't want to seem like I'm actively lying by going "wait what argument" but at the same time what argument

#i have forgotten entire months and large chunks of years before #i barely remember 2021. like i remember absolutely NOTHING of late november or december of that year #even though i am confident something definitely major with either a family member or friend happened then #and none of my brain roommates remember either except for ebony who said she was fronting because i was stressed #but other than that i cant see any reason to forget the entire month #and we dont really have memory issues between us either so thats weird #like we can communicate and remember things between us pretty clearly so theres no reason why that shouldve caused it #like it has nothing to do with people in my brain i just cant remember shit for fuck <3

[beroebluejeans]

I am constantly thinking about a review of Harrow the Ninth where the reviewer disliked a lot about the book but specifically complained how it wasn’t sci-fi-y enough for something set 10,000 years in the future. He complained it was unrealistic they were eating ginger biscuits and smoking cigarettes and I’m like … THAT’S INTENTIONAL! IT’S THEMATICALLY SIGNIFICANT!! TAMSYN MUIR IS MAKING A POINT ABOUT HOW CLINGING TO A GLORIFIED PAST WILL DESTROY YOU!!

John Gaius tells us (well, Harrow) in Nona the Ninth that he always hated change, but even in Harrow the Ninth it’s clear—he and his lyctors are stagnating and have been for millennia. They’re constantly talking about how great things used to be (sexy parties, Cassiopeia’s cooking, etc.). They have no hope for the future. John has a spaceship full of bodies in cryosleep—literally frozen in time and undying but also unable to grow or live. He is the Emperor Undying.

The theme becomes more explicit in Nona the Ninth: we see John (and arguably BOE) stuck on this 10,000-year-old grudge and unable to move past it. He thought he could keep Alecto in stasis in a tomb what, forever? He makes Gideon into a non-living preserved version of herself.

Meanwhile the characters who are living and growing are changing, even when it’s sometimes awful, because it’s how they keep doing what needs to be done. Palamedes and Camilla say before they become Paul that it wasn’t inevitable, but it is the best thing they can do now: they will make this imperfect irreversible change because that’s how they keep living and protecting the people they love. On the trip to the Ninth, Nona considers it might be better to just die, instead of continue this uncertain journey forward, but ultimately accepts irrevocable, painful change because NOODLE. And because “You can’t take loved away”: change doesn’t destroy the past or invalidate the good that existed there. Living requires change, but change doesn’t require forgetting.

Anyway, thank you to that reviewer who was so annoyed by the ginger biscuits in Harrow the Ninth that he illuminated a major theme in the series for me.

#the locked tomb #harrow the ninth #nona the ninth