i’m begging for more ava + service dog
[teeny tiny thing for nye :)]
//
‘okay,’ bea says, surveying all of the decorations and food laid out everywhere, buttoning and unbuttoning the top clasp on her blouse, neatly tucked into her slacks. ‘i think everything is ready.’
‘everything looks great.’ you wheel over to where she’s anxiously straightening some napkins. ‘babe.’
bea swallows, waits a second before she takes the hand you offer her.
‘hey,’ you say when you notice she might be about to cry. ’why are you so nervous? it’s a little party with people we love.’
she sniffles. ‘i know, i know. and i’m happy, ava; i’m so happy. there’s peace, and i have you and our home and our life.’
you wheel over to the couch so she can sit next to you; korra patters next to you dutifully, her tongue lolling in a happy little smile. bea sits stiffly, so you nudge korra, who happily moves to rest her head in bea’s lap, calming and gentle.
‘beatrice, what’s wrong?’
she shakes her head, scratches korra’s soft fur. ‘sometimes i feel so anxious that the other shoe is going to drop.’
‘well, it kind of did.’ you gesture toward your chair with a small smile. your back had been really bad lately, even in the relatively mild cold in california, even after dr. salvius had done everything possible. it’s a new normal, different than when you’d been hurt before — there are so many people who love you, who want to make sure you have resources and accessibility and support and independence. you have korra, and beatrice, and a home that has grown warmer and more beautiful each and every day.
‘you know i don’t think of anything you need like that,’ bea says, a little scolding, which makes your smile grow.
‘bea, i know that. i just — something hard happened. we dealt with it, we’re dealing with it. we have such a beautiful life, even with everything. because of everything.’
bea takes a deep breath and then meets your eyes; she lifts her hand to run it through your hair and then rests it on your cheek.
‘life is going to happen, good and bad and mundane and revelatory.’ her face softens and she rests her forehead against yours, her new glasses — translucent sage green frames, round and, in your opinion, adorable — just barely slipping down her nose, over her freckles. ‘but, bea, we get to live it all together.’
she nods, and her smile grows more and more genuine.
‘my love,’ you say, ‘it’s all i’ve ever wanted.’
she rubs her thumb along your cheekbone. ‘i love you. i love our life. i love it all, so much.’
you kiss her gently. ‘so then let’s celebrate, yeah? we have enough food and alcohol for a small army.’
‘small army?’ you hear, a familiar, laughing voice, after a whoosh somewhere in your kitchen. when you look up, camila, mother superion, and mary are there, along with lilith, who grumbles a ‘you’re welcome’ before grabbing a bottle of champagne and heading out to the patio.
‘happy new year!’ camila says, and korra looks at you with eager eyes, her little butt starting to wiggle with how hard she’s wagging her tail.
‘okay,’ you tell korra. ‘you can go say hi to your friends.’
she bounds over and bea stands with a smile, kisses the top of your head, and unbuttons the top two buttons of her shirt before walking over. mother superion wraps her in a tight hug and then bends down to do the same with you. no one comments on your chair — it’s been long enough now, and they never have, but it’s just part of your life, and who you are, and they love you. bea had been right all those years ago. everyone pets korra; even lilith wanders back in to scratch behind her ears. mary teases bea about her glasses and camila shows you the newest tech she’s designed.
there’s ambient music and the waves outside, your friends all around. you eat too much food and drink probably too much champagne and, as it nears midnight, you take bea’s hand and settle out on the patio, korra asleep at your feet.
your friends — your family — count down from inside and you hold bea’s hand in yours, look at her so gently: the love of your life, in this one and the next.
you kiss her as fireworks go off and camila blows a noisemaker; you feel her smile against your mouth.
‘happy new year, bea.’
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2022: greatest hits
I got tagged in this (thanks @smoothshine! <3) and had to take a while to think about it and about how to do it in a healthy way as it feels like there aren’t a lot of measurable things in my life at the moment, so marking success is hard. But ten good things from this last year ... I’ve broken it down into lots of similar but distinct items to manage ten.
1. I joined a rl writers group at the start of the year! They only meet once a month, but it’s been incredible and very encouraging to have just casual conversation about writing for a few hours.
2. I wrote a lot of fanfiction. It’s been fun to get my writing muscles going again.
3. I've planned out a decent amount of original fiction and plan to give that a decent go.
4. I started back at work part-time and it’s really so good to have more contact with people and to get out of the house more.
5. I bought an electronic piano with some unexpected windfall money and have been able to brush up on some pieces that I haven’t been able to play for ages (even on the keyboard I had before this - that we got rid of a year or so ago because it died - because it didn’t have as many octaves on it and so anything with an octave bass-line was cut off for most of the notes).
6. It’s been lovely making lots of online friends and getting to know you all :3
7. Kid 1 is coping a lot better with many things that used to distress him, like opening presents or being with other children.
8. Kid 2 is learning a lot of words right now and that’s pretty great.
9. My marriage is still going strong, which isn’t a change, but is something to be thankful for. A few close friends/family members have had varying levels of turbulence this year, and it reminds you not to take things for granted.
10. Said turbulence has also reminded me to really dig in to God. That has been a very calming foundation as big changes have happened.
I don’t know who hasn’t been tagged in this, but let’s try @lonepiper5758, @chrysopoeias, @osorezanna and @sunshineandchemistry! Do it if you want, don’t if you don’t want to - I hope you had a good year though and have an even better one on the way!
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