#hmm haven't posted any more stuff from my trip

[theemeraldforesthideout]

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

#hmm haven't posted any more stuff from my trip #for a few days #let's see...

[give-soup-please]

An explanation

Okay, I've gotten to a stable enough place now where I can explain what's been going on. A series of events and circumstances have made it very hard to write recently. For the record, if anyone's worried, I am safe, and alive. But my body is a mess.

(warning. long post, discussions of religious trauma, and upbringing. triggering content under the cut.)

So I finished moving into my college dorm recently, right? Everything has been transported from my old location to my new one. But, it came at a high cost. It involved going back and forth between my car and my new dorm several times during 100+ degree weather. My new location is hotter than my old location, which, given that it's California, does me no favors. Check out the weather for this week.

YIKES.

So the first day of my move in, I lugged several boxes around, an estimated 200 pounds of stuff, over hot tarmac and through the resident halls. After that, I went shopping, because I essentially have to build my apartment from scratch. All that was included was a fridge, an oven, a desk, a couch, and a bed. All the little things I took for granted in my old living spaces, trash cans, shower curtains, pots and pans, all the little appliances and gadgets and plates and bowls and everything one needs to have a nice living situation.

I bought a crapload of stuff. Then, I went grocery shopping because the fridge was empty and the drive was far enough that I couldn't transport food from one location to the next. All in 105+ degree weather. I'm on my own, I have no roommates, I'm doing all the literal and figurative heavy lifting while I get myself set up.

The next day, I did almost the exact same thing. I went shopping 3 times for different items in terrible weather.

The day after that... I did it again. Three more shopping trips, heavy lifting, and heat exhaustion. If you'd like to call me a fool at this point, I wouldn't blame you.

On top of that, the tap water where I live is terrible, so I've also had to buy gallons of water in bulk and lug those around. I've stocked up for the week ahead, because- good lord, this hot weather is killer. At the time of this sentence, it's 7PM and 107 out. You have my promise, whatever it's worth, that everything I'm telling you is actually real. On top of that, I've moved far enough away from everyone I know that there's no one I can call over and have them lend a hand. This isn't a 'I will never see my friends again' thing, it's a 'few people are available to drop everything and make a major commute out to see me and help.'

And between all of this, I was also writing and posting.

On the fourth night, I don't know what happened, but my best guess is that everything caught up with me at once. I was washing dishes one moment, then I had a hard time catching my breath the next. I leaned against the sink heavily, and couldn't do anything. I could not move. I stumbled to bed and collapsed for a while. And I've struggled with basic tasks ever since.

The other problem I have is due to the way I was conditioned as a kid. Any and all spare energy is supposed to be devoted to tasks. Even this morning, I ended up screwing myself over in the long run.

'Hmm. I have some energy again. Fantastic! I'll clean the oven!' - the thought process of the utterly deranged. (me)

So let's tally up everything.

The stress of moving and the anxiety of beginning another chapter of life

Hot weather and a lot of heavy lifting

Seeing loved ones less

Refusing to take breaks

Trauma based thinking (which I'll get into in a moment)

Turning my favorite hobby into a 'must work' thinking pattern

Classes starting soon

Refusal to disappoint others by taking time off of writing

Extreme anxiety tendencies

I haven't finished unpacking due to the above things, so the apartment is a mess.

Folks, that is the perfect storm for severe burnout, if there ever was one.

Now I'm going to tell you why this is happening. I've got pretty decent self insight, and I know how this combination happened. I don't go into detail about my past often, because I generally like to keep this blog a pleasant place. It's also why drama from inside the inbox doesn't get published. That being said, and i'm bastardizing the phrase here,

An explanation isn't always for the reader. Sometimes we (the writers) need to parse out our thoughts as well.

Underneath the cut, I'm going to talk about my upbringing, and the cause of current thought patterns. (tw: emotional abuse, religious trauma)

So when I was a kid, my parents were very intense about making sure I was a hard worker. I was always pushed to do more, even when at my limit. Even when I, as a small child, needed breaks, I was always spurred on to do more, to work harder. The only time something I did was acknowledged, was if it was related to work. Even then, this wasn't a guarantee. I remember one time, I got 99% on a science project, and I received a lecture about missing out on that one percent. One time, I got 100% on an Economics project, but because I wasn't the only one who ended up with 100%, my work was discarded because it wasn't 'unique' or 'important enough'. My mom tutored me through my math classes, then took credit for me passing them, claiming it was her good teaching that allowed me to succeed, and that I had nothing to do with my grade. That's three examples out of a hundred.

Hey, uh- that's pretty fucked up, isn't it?

So when you're conditioned to see work as your only value, a lot of bad things can happen. You start pushing yourself, even when no one's around to do the pushing. That's what's happening now. I'm not going to be punished if I take a day off, or don't get everything done on a to do list, but that's not what my brain shouts at me.

Now let's talk about religion. I grew up in a very restrictive religious background, and religion was often used to make me work harder as well. I remember going to church camps and being told stuff like, laziness is a sin, idle hands are the devil's workshop, and the several hundred bible verses there are about working as much as you can. So when you grow up with the belief that taking time off and relaxing is morally wrong, you wind up with a huge complex. It's a Christian's duty to abstain from feeling good, and to work themselves to death. Or at least, that's the message I grew up with.

Here's the kicker. There's a severe generational thing hanging over me as well. My father's father, and his father, and his father, and so on, all died the same way. All roughly in their sixties, from a stress induced heart attack. Talk about a legacy.

If anyone's familiar with the bible, and has a passing familiarity with Genesis, there's a verse that sticks out.

On the seventh day of creation, God rested.

God can take a day off. So should I. But you didn't come here for a religious discussion.

Point being, I burned myself out for no reason. Again, there is no one here except me. I will no longer be hurt if I rest, I will no longer be punished for taking a day off. And yet- and yet-

I keep doing it. Every single scrap of energy I regain goes into fixing up the apartment. Cleaning the oven this morning- I mean, really? I was exhausted after it was done and dropped into bed for three hours afterwards.

And I just feel so sad about my situation. We have ten days til I'm meant to stop, and I wanted to spend them writing for you guys. I wanted so very much to keep producing as much as I could. But I'm not in a position to do that right now. I love this community so much. So much. You guys have no idea how deeply my love for this community runs. I said in a personal post a few months ago that I don't love casually. With real people or with fictional characters, it's at 100% or nothing. I am not a lukewarm person.

All jets go, all the time. I've never been able to work out a way to slow down before.

I remember when my brother dropped me off for therapy because I didn't have a car of my own back then. He looked at me sardonically and said, "Why can't you just be better?" and to this day, I still don't know.

I hesitate to bring it up, but- The nature of the internet means anyone can read this, not just friends and followers. Everything I've said I would feel comfortable telling to a stranger, because I've told these stories in many times, many ways. Let me ask you this. If I can tell you all this, if a stranger can read these words, then ask yourself.

What happened to me that I can't talk about? There are so many things I wish people knew about me that I can't tell. No one will ever have a full picture of me, and I have to learn to be okay with that.

The last thing I'll post is ready to go. I finished it back in mid august, thank goodness. But as for how much I can write in between now and then? I don't know that either. It's kind of why I asked for help. I wanted to have the narrator himself give me permission to rest, as odd as that might sound. It's one of the few consistent loopholes I have. If a fictional character tells/asks me to, it's easier. I don't know why.

If you've read this far, then thank you. And I hope we can all find the peace we're looking for.

#not tsp related #prsonal #tw emotional abuse #tw religious abuse #vent

[fumbliesthots]

Jun 2022

Time again for another mid-year check-in / "bday post".

June this year was kinda intense at work as we were busy preparing the leadership team for the re-org and offsite event at Prague. But I had a short break few days before the offsite flying over a bit earlier to hang out with Eos for a bit. She's never been to Prague before (I've been to Brugge a couple of times to visit her in previous work trips) so this was also like an excellent opportunity for her to do some sightseeing in a city she's never been to.

Eos taught me to a secret to make our legs look longer in photos. (You just have to point it a bit sideways.)

Also a weekend hiking trip to the breathtaking Bohemia/Saxon Switzerland.

After the work trip, I flew home a bit earlier than the rest of the gang. Partly so that I could have some chill me-time, esp after spending a week socialising with so many of my colleagues, my social energy tank was hitting quite low. Also because I was flying Qatar, while the rest was with SQ, which was on different schedule. (Sidenote: So lucky I was on this flight – SQ was cancelled last minute, European transferring airports in chaos, and the girls had a terrible flight adventure back home)

"White shirt party" - XDSG's last fancy dinner in Prague, and bday celebration for me.

The flight back was also quite a serendipitous encounter. On the transfer gate at Doha airport, waiting to board my flight, I spotted a caucasian lady talking on the phone with a very familiar tone and accent. I glanced up my book and only to see this lady's face masked up and wearing a puffy newsboy cap. She had that iconic Astrid vibe but I couldn't be sure, because, what are the chances?

So I just minded my own business, boarded the plane. And while loading my stuff on the overhead cabin, I looked over and saw this lady again a few seats away from me in the opposite aisle. She was with another guy who also looked quite familiar... But still, that's fine. It's probably not her... but hmm... this is flight to Singapore. Maybe...

The rest of the flight was uneventful until we landed at Changi Airport finally. Once I got off the plane, I texted Huiling and told her about how I saw someone that looked suspiciously like Astrid on the plane. She quickly replied that, recently Astrid did post on facebook that she's coming back to Singapore for a visit. Maybe it's really her, and I should go say hi.

By then I was already at the arrival lounge, taking my time to go to the toilet, then went to slowly check out the Duty Free shops to lookseelooksee if there is any cheap alcohol to buy (Not that I would know what is cheap anyway). No way I would see her again.

Walking into the liquor section, I spotted that lady was again, and this time I was able to see her upclose, and hear her speaking to her husband. By then I was 90% sure it was Astrid. So I put on my thick skin, went up and asked, "Excuse me, Hi. Are you Astrid?"

She looked up, startled, squinted through her funky glasses, then a looked of recognition crept to her face, "Evon! What a surprise!" She pulled down her face mask and said, "Yes I am! Long time no see!" and reached out for a hug.

She was genuinely surprised and told me that it's kind of weird fate that I was the one that she would bump into the first time landing in Singapore since moving away 5 years ago. The last time we met was also by chance encounter – on our nature walk at the Green Corridor, her last walk before leaving Singapore. That is strangely fated indeed.

19 Jun 2022: Took a selfie with my fav FYP prof at Changi Arrival Hall - what a weirdly wonderful chance encounter to be on the same flight. Such a great gift from the universe on my bday??

I jioed Huiling to meet up with Astrid for lunch the following Monday to catch up even more. (Bread Yard at Galaxis)

Now for some mid-year check-in reflections. Looking at my previous post, seems like I haven't made much progress in terms of achieving "Balance". But actually, I realised I've never really defined what that really means and how that shows up in terms of my actions and behaviour. So, my bad.

I'm still spending most of my time at work. But does "balance" actually mean spending half my time at work, and half in my non-work life? Or is it a "feeling", something more intangible and less measurable?

Realistically, it would probably be a torture for me to limit how much time I spend at work. I've come to realise that it's just not how my brain works. I cannot just switch it off. Especially when I'm working through a problem or just generally thinking about ways to improve things. And I do enjoy these "work" moments as much as things like eating breakfast foods, hanging out with people I like, reading a book in a quiet cafe, nua-ing in my bed while watching 荷兰村, or going for a walk in the neighbourhood while listening to my favorite podcasts.

So maybe I should just stop feeling guilty about not being able to shut down. And just embrace the fact that, whatever I do, I will just give it my all, and it's ok that my priorities can shift based on the season. After all, I've recently come to realise I'm quite good at regulating my own well-being, and never take on more than I can tahan.

My friend Chris once asked me, if life is like a bento box, with many different sized compartments, how would my bento box look like? I recalled that my answer back then, I think probably now still stands, as more like a caifan box – with everything piled on top of each other messily. All the flavours of the gravy from each dish mixed in each other... that's what makes life more delicious, isn't it?

And since I just turned 34, a few people are asking if I would buy a flat when I turn 35 next year. I guess that would be the prudent thing to do?? But I just have no motivation to start looking into it yet.

However, recently a very vivid vision came to me, that would probably not be possible to do in my parents' house...

[honeynutouran]

Me too (Kirishima x Reader)

Summary: You have had a crush on Kirishima since you started going to UA but you never said anything. Now third years you have a long weekend and you and your friends decide to go on a road trip.

Word count: 1.8k

Kirishima x GN reader

Y/N = your name

A/N: I haven't written in a hot minute so I wrote this up feeling the need to write. Sorry if its not the best I just wanted to post something for you guys. Also I suck at endings so I apologize.

Warnings: some cursing, one bed and fluff. (If there are any other warnings please reach out to me so I know)

UNEDITED

Being best friends with Bakugou Katsuki had its perks like he would help you study because “If you won’t leave me alone might as well keep up with me.” (His exact words) And you got to hang out with his other friends and his other best friend, Kirishima.

Bakugou has noticed that you have had a liking for Kirishima and would not drop it. “God, just say something to shitty hair already, I am sick of you staring at him all the time. I’m trying to teach you this new move listen dumbass.” He said to you when he caught you staring at Kirishima during training.

“I was admiring his form, shut up boom-boom boy.” You spat back, hitting him with your quirk.

“Yeah right, his form, and that didn’t even hurt.” He laughed brushing off where you had hit him.

“I wasn’t aiming to hurt you, dumbass.” You said this time aiming at his head as he tried to dodge your oncoming attack.

A few weeks had passed and you and the rest of your group were planning what you would all do on your next long weekend. Mina insisted you all go on a road trip stopping at her house one night since she had enough room for everyone as long as everyone was cool with sharing sleeping spaces. Everyone agreed it seemed like fun, well almost everyone.

“Why would I want to spend a long weekend with you extras?” Bakugou questioned.

“Bakugoubro, you’ll have a great time with us.” Kaminari smiled a toothy grin to Bakugou and Kirishima joined in.

“Yeah, it wouldn’t be very mainly to skip out on time with your friends," Kirishima added.

“Plus, if you don’t hang out with us, who else will put up with you?” Sero chimed in causing everyone but the boy in question to laugh.

“Fine, so you guys stop annoying me.” He gave in and you smiled to yourself thinking about a weekend with your friends and especially with Kirishima.

After getting permission from Aizawa to leave the dorms for the weekend and Sero borrowing his family’s minivan the plan all fell into place.

“We can take turns driving every couple of hours!” Mina exclaimed climbing into the passenger seat next to Sero in the driver’s seat. Behind them in the middle row were Bakugou and Kaminari. You and Kirishima were in the very back because Bakugou claimed he would get car sick in the back (a lie he came up with so you could sit next to Kirishima, unknown to you) and Kaminari claimed he would be best in the middle so he could charge everyone’s phones fairly.

“let me know if you need more room, it would be unmanly of me if I made you uncomfortable.” Kirishima smiled at you as you guys got situated in your seats.

“I’m okay, thanks, Kiri.” You smiled back at him.

After a few hours, you started to feel yourself get more and more tired despite it now being Mina's driving shift and she was not the most graceful driver.

“Hey, Y/N you look pretty tired,” Kirishima whispered.

“hmm.” You nodded in reply your eyelids becoming heavier. You tried to fight the tiredness, but you failed, finally letting the sleep take over.

Kirishima was frozen in place as your head plopped onto his shoulder, he knew that if he moved and woke you up it would be super unmanly. He would never let anyone wake up because of him, especially you. Mina looked in the mirror and smiled at the sight of you and whispered to the rest of the car to look. With that Kirishima blushed when the rest of the boys turned towards you two Kaminari giving him a thumbs up. Bakugou rolled his eyes at the sight but he was secretly happy for his best friends.

After some more time and everyone having driven, you had finally arrived at Mina’s house. “Welcome to my humble abode!” Mina smiled while gesturing toward the house. “It is a little cramped but, we have 2 spare rooms.” She explained.

“So two rooms and six of us?” Sero asked.

“Well three rooms including mine, so two per room. I’m assuming Y/N in my room then the rest of you can split up.” Mina suggested.

“No way am I sleeping in the same room as any of these loud idiots. I’ll be with you raccoon eyes.” Bakugou complained.

“I am not sure my parents will be okay with you in my room Bakugou.” Mina started.

“Parents love me-“ started but was cut off by your laughing.

“Bakugou my parents have known you since you were in diapers, and they cannot stand you sometimes.” You laughed even more.

“Shut up ditz, I don’t want to be stuck with you all night either. I’ll talk to raccoon eyes parents. Also, sparky you cannot room with Y/N last time you guys had a ‘sleepover’ you short-circuited and shocked Y/N and you both had to see recovery girl.” Bakugou reminded you before walking into the house to convince Mina’s parents of his sleeping arrangement.

“Hey, that was awesome, and we were fine.” Kaminari protested.

“It’s okay dude, we can room together, finish out the smash bros tournament we started in the van.” Sero offered, and Kaminari happily agreed.

“Looks like we are roomies.” Kirishima smiled at you pulling his stuff and yours out of the van.

“I can take that.” You said pointing to your bag but, Kirishima shook his head and insisted he got it. “Thanks, Kiri, you really don’t have to though.” You say feeling bad that he is taking your stuff.

“It’s okay Y/N you’re stuck rooming with me, it’s the least I can do.” He offered smiling, a faint blush dusting his cheeks.

“I am not stuck with you, Kiri you would have been my first choice.” You smile back your face starting to heat up. Kiri looks at you a little too long before he realizes he is holding both your stuff and his own.

“I should go bring these to the room then.” He coughed out walking into the house.

“Well, that damn blasty brat convinced my parents that he would be the best to sleep in my room, so I guess I will show the rest of you where you will be staying.” Mina sighed not looking forward to her sleeping arrangements.

“Hey, I am a delight.” Bakugou yelled from somewhere in the house.

“Yeah, can’t wait. Anyways Kaminari and Sero you guys can take my brother's old room since you won’t mind the smell. Kirishima and Y/N you guys can take the guest bedroom.” Mina said pointing to each room. Kirishima nodded and took your stuff into the guest room upon entering he turned to you his face matching his hair.

“Uh Y/N… there is only one bed. I can ask Mina if she has a spare futon or something if you want me to, it would be super unmanly to make you share the bed with me an-“ you cut off his rambling.

“Kiri, it is okay, the bed is pretty big anyways there is plenty of room I wouldn’t want you to be stuck on the floor. I promise it is okay.” You say hoping he does not realize your face is on fire from the idea of sharing a bed with the boy you have been in love with since your first year at UA.

“Well, if you are sure it is okay.” He says a little unsure himself.

“It is.” You reassure him.

When it was time to go to bed Kirishima was panicking when he was changing into his pajamas, what if he did something to make you uncomfortable or what if he does something stupid, but what he didn’t know is you were having the same worries as you changed in the bathroom. After you finished changing you knocked on the door to see if it was okay to come in.

“I’m changed, you can come in,” Kiri said, turning towards the door when you came in. “What side of the bed do you want?”

“Oh, uh I don’t care either is fine.” You said walking in and closing the door behind you.

“Okay, I will just take the side closer to me then.” He said getting into bed, practically on the edge.

“Kiri, you can move over some more, you don’t have to worry. I would be worried if you fell off the bed.” You laughed at his attempts to be as respectful as possible.

“I just don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” He explained once again.

“Kiri how many times must I tell you? You could never make me uncomfortable.” You said moving closer to him.

“Are you sure, because what if I like ended up cuddling you or something?” he blushed.

“I would be okay with that.” You admitted hiding your face under the sheets to avoid any further embarrassment. But your surprise Kirishima grabbed your waist and pulled you closer to him.

“This is okay?” he asked.

“It is more than okay.” You replied molding yourself into him.

“I’m glad.” He smiled into the back of your head making himself comfortable against your touch. You two quickly fell asleep in each other’s embrace.

At the moment you two were way too happy to be with one another you forgot about the four other members of your group. You were still in Kirishima’s embrace by morning, only have gotten more entangled with each other.

“Shitty hair, ditz get up!” Bakugou yelled as he opened your door. You both bolted up and backed away from each other only to have Bakugou scoff and close the door. “Don’t be late for breakfast.” He said from behind the door.

“We should probably get down there,” Kirishima said scratching the back of his neck.

“Yeah but first I gotta do something.” You said scooting closer to Kirishima.

“Do what?” he asked as you got closer.

“This.” You smirked, closing the distance between you two by crashing your lips into his, he quickly caught on and deepened the kiss letting the feelings across that you two have shared for each other for years. “Been wanting to do that for a long time.” You smiled when you broke apart.

“Me too.” He smiled back in his crooked smile. “So does this mean we are dating?”

“I hope so.” You said grabbing his hand and pulling him out of bed.

“Then it does.” He replied as you walked hand in hand to breakfast.

“I CALLED IT!” Mina yelled when you two walked into the kitchen.

“Sero owes me five bucks.” Kaminari said smirking at you two.

“Technically no, because we do not know when this happened.” Sero said to Kaminari making him frown.

“Who cares, can we eat,” Bakugou complained but you could have sworn when no one was looking he smiled to himself. “Told you, you should have told him.” He said to you under his breath.

“Did you know this whole time Katsuki?” you asked.

“Tch, know what?" He replied taking a bite of his food and refusing to keep talking on the matter. Kirishima grabbed your hand once again giving it a small squeeze and smiling at you when you turned your head towards him.

“I’m glad we went on this trip.” He smiled.

“Me too.” You smiled back Kiri.

#eijiro kirishima #kirishima eijiro #kirishima x reader #gender neutral reader x kirishima #mha kirishima #bnha kirishima #mha x reader #bnha x reader #my hero academia x reader #mha #mha fluff #sfw #mha x y/n #kirishima x yn #eijro x reader

[in-tua-deep]

hmm, got any nice hcs or ideas you haven't gotten to talk about in other asks?? I'm still reeling from the magic/ians shitstorm that happened this week, cute stuff would be welcome(if you want to of course)

i absolutely do!! i don’t follow that show so i’m not sure what happened but i can absolutely provide soft and random content!!

Diego is the person who, when he had food that is bite sized, will toss it up in the air and catch it in his mouth. He will do this for everything, and yes it IS to establish dominance

i have a lot of thoughts about the family converting that depressing ass courtyard into a big old garden with flowers everywhere and maybe a vegetable garden/herb garden that Grace could help tend to and the kids could all sit out there and relax

i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about Five and flowers and appreciating green and growing things because i’m treating the ash in the apocalypse as being like, post a bunch of massive volcanic eruptions that kill a whole lotta shit and fuck up crops and plants hardcore and idk if 40 years is enough to recover because sometimes it can take hundreds of years to recover from that

okay this is a sad one but I headcanon that the first time Klaus really thought about the future was in a cot surrounded by the noises of the jungle and men snoring as he and Dave whispered back and forth about things they wanted to do after the war, where Dave would smile and tell Klaus about this little diner that wasn’t too far from his house growing up that made the best pancakes in the states and that one day Dave was going to take Klaus there, or about the ice cream place downtown that was just to die for, or the roller rink where Dave had all his birthday parties growing up and and and - just all the places Dave wanted to share with Klaus, all the places he planned on taking him, on showing him - and that’s the first time Klaus started actually planning towards a future, his future, their future

(at some point, Klaus does end up going to Dave’s hometown. Diego offered to drive him, but it ended up somehow being a family road trip. The roller rink closed down. The ice cream place is also closed, in its place is some fast food place. But the diner is still there, somehow. They all go in and Klaus cries into his pancakes when they arrive because this was something Dave had wanted to show him, a moment Dave had wanted him to have, and it aches aches aches)

Klaus 100% finds some buddies from his squad who are still alive who are absolutely gobsmacked to see Klaus because they 100% just assumed he’d cracked when he told them he was from the future and all that but here Klaus is, plain as day, and they’re all fucking thrilled to see him and are good

one of them shows Klaus pictures from a protest where the whole squad had shown up in Dave and Klaus’s names to advocate for gay marriage being legalized

also when Klaus tells them about time travel bullshit and is all “blame my brother” he absolutely 100% introduces Five to his war buddies and I genuinely can’t decide if this was a brilliant or terrible idea because Five is an old man who would absolutely get these old war dogs black sense of humor but also they would look at this child who looks around their grandkids age or whatever and be like “hmm. we’re adopting klaus first of all, on principle. we’re also adopting you. actually just. the whole family. all of you. you’re all traumatized infants, and any family of klaus is family of ours”

the whole family gets an squad of old veterans who are taking them all under their wings whether they like it or not tbh and they’re all chronologically older than Five anyway so respect ur elders son

HMM another headcanon i haven’t talked enough about is my artist!Five headcanon where, because Five feels a need to keep his hands busy, he turns from writing equations to drawing. He also did it in the apocalypse though, usually with a stick and a patch of dirt or something. Just doodling, scratching lines into dust and improving

this is basically just me trying to get my idiot son to do art therapy and start drawing and be really good at in and also end up sketching his siblings a whole lot (not always his siblings as they are now, but as they are in his memories: thirteen and fresh faced and the last time he saw them alive because the only other memory of them he had to cling to was the memory of their dead bodies for forty five years)

i have a random headcanon that Vanya fosters kittens in her spare time for no reason other than the fact that i like it and i like kittens and also i have a scene in my head where she hands a teeny baby kitten to like, Luther or one of the others and they’re just transfixed by how illegally tiny these kittens are what the heck

Klaus is the sibling who, when washing his hair with shampoo, spikes it into a mohawk for no reason other than simple zest for life. He also sings in the shower, and i’m talking like operatic singing and he’s certainly going to try and hit all those high notes. He won’t manage it and WILL sound like he’s slowly being murdered, but he’s certainly going to try

the first time he does this in the house three of his siblings bust into the bathroom convinced the commission came back and klaus is startled and screams and when he finds out why they busted in is all offended like “clearly i am the only sibling with CULTURE so FUCK YOU ALL”

i have so many headcanons about Claire and Five tbh for no reason other than the fact that i think they would be a terrifyingly chaotic duo because Five is 100% willing to just go with whatever Claire has plans for and absolutely no frame of reference for what is an isn’t appropriate for a child to be doing so when Claire is like “hey how fast do you think i can slide down the banister” five is right there going “hmm idk but i’ll time you if you want”

five and claire, showing up at the picnic covered in mud and soaking wet, holding frogs: what’s up everyone we caught dinner

klaus buys the whole family matching heelies because i say so and because it seems like the kind of impulse purchase that Klaus would make tbh

i feel like klaus instigates a lot of childish activities that the whole family ends up participating in. Why yes, Luther, we have taken over the entirety of the living room to build this big ass box fort. Why no, Luther, you aren’t allowed inside it and if you come close we WILL pelt you with these scrunched up balls of paper we have decided to use as ammunition. I can assure you that Diego is just as accurate with paper balls as he is with knives, Luther

this has ended up being a lot of Klaus but look if you think Klaus doesn’t demand that Luther give him piggybacks and carry him places then you’re just wrong because he would also demand that of every single sibling and will throw himself at them regardless of whether they’re actually capable of holding him up or not (Vanya is,, deceptively strong surprisingly enough)

Five, like a cat, will splay out and lay in patches on sunlight in the house. Maybe he could have been left alone about this habit, but Klaus decided to start doing it as well in solidarity and now the others end up tripping over one of their brothers limbs entering a room and end up on the floor swearing up a storm

okay that’s all i got for now

come back later and u may receive more Random Headcanons a la moi

#ask me #anonymous #tua #the umbrella acadmy #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #allison hargreeves #klaus hargreeves #five hargreeves #number five #ben hargreeves #vanya hargreeves #claire hargreeves #tua claire #my headcanons #misha has been laying on my arm this whole time by the way #he likes to make my life difficult #i love u misha but please i'm trying to type

[kerkero]

I got tagged!!!

Tagged: @foodscarf Tagged me! Thanks for doing so, Scarf!!:D

Rule:Tag 10 of your followers that you wanna get to know better

Name : Hmm...Well, I'd rather not say in all honesty...But i do go by Fishsticks due to close irl friends! l(•O•)l

Nicknames: Frog or any variation of it on Discord! (•u•)

Gender: Well...Again i don't wanna say..But, I do get called a He or a They online alot! (*>×O)

Star sign: Well...I dunno the complicated bits but I am an Aquarius! \(*O*)/

Height: 5'1 (T^T||)

Hogwarts House: Well...I haven't touched on the Harry Potter Series but...My friends made me take a test once and I got Hufflepuff!

Favorite Animal: I really like Cats! But then again Beluga whales are so cute!!! (`•U•`)

Sexuality: Im Bi and Im ready to die for my friends!!(Aka Everyone)

Average Hours of sleep: I try to get around 8-9 hours of sleep for all the energy I'll be needing the next day!

Current time: 5:57pm EDT as of making this post!

Favorite Drink: I really like Russian Black Tea! But then again...I would drink Jasmine tea for often if I would go to vietnamese resteraunts more often \(•□•)/

Blankets you sleep with: I have this one giant fluffy purple one from Korea!! Its really nice and warm! Specially if its straight outta of the dryer!

Dream Trip: Either to Russia or Vietnam!! I wanna know what it was like there when my parents and grandparents lived there!

Reason for url: Well....I really like the Creme of cake and I like Frogs and is known as Frog on discord! So i just smashed together my two favorite things!

Dream Job: I wanna be a Videogame director or Just anyone that makes people happy in general! Even if it is at the expense of my own! (Although..Their happiness would be my happiness!)

When i made my blog: Well...I dunno when i did! I sorta just forgot! (<^<||)

Followers: 30!! Its amazing to think 30 people would follow me! I don't post much original content in all honesty...

Why I made my blog: Hmmm...Well I don't remember but I guess its to just make friends and look at funny stuff!

Tags: @liquidchocolatecake @hopkidj

@rainenchanter @cinnamaemae @pekoyamss @shit-villagers-say @arealsetofbadonkers @robottophobic @millixia78 @spacecurry

[michin--yeoja]

Hi again ^^ Sorry I'm still anon and haven't been responding. I got hit with a huge wave of work and have barely slept the last few days. But it's all over now and I'll get your gift to you soon!! Biotech is essentially trying to make a biological product! It's a huge field so there's a lot of things from like pharmaceuticals, cell therapy, to things like bio-remediation and environmental stuff. Your genetics teacher might be thinking about bioinformatics which is biotech and a lot of coding XD

But good luck with applying to med school! If that’s your dream there are always ways to make it work! I believe in you ^^ Oh I’m from around the New England area. I did my undergrad in New Jersey and now I’m doing my master’s in Rhode Island. Yes I studied in Stockholm! I traveled to the more touristy areas of Europe because I’ve never been to Europe, but I really wanna just take a backpacking trip around one day. There’s so many different places to go TT And so much foooooood      

I have been to Taiwan a few times! It’s been a while though. Most of my mom’s side of the family is back there, but my dad’s side of the family is in the US. I have a younger sister! Haha I know what you mean about being asked where you’re from though. When I was abroad I’d get asked where I’m from and I’d say the US, but then one person was like “but where are you REALLY from”. Honestly I also feel pretty out of touch with Taiwanese culture even though I have some habits. I really feel American       

I saw True Love but I haven’t had time to hear the whole thing! That’s my weekend goal. But I believe City of Angels (lol laser) was the one he sang at the fanmeet so I’m already in love with that one. So good TT And he wrote that one himself

It was only Myung in the Winter Olympics one! It’s understandable though, there were so many groups in the summer competition one and Infinite was a little neglected imo. But they still managed to get me with hamster gyu and like 5 seconds of Destiny lol. Actually MBLAQ was in this ep too! Lee Joon and Kwangsoo make the most amazing combo ever omg. I def miss the name tag eliminations though. They hardly do them anymore. I really liked the time period when they did creative versions of the game.   

Ohhhh I think I’ve heard of MBLAQ Goes to School. I should look into it haha. I’m always up for a laugh. Sesame player was amazing. Lol and those pranks XD I remember (I think it was Dongwoo) was like “when did this become a prank house” after that salt prank and I’m like lol only infinite. Can’t even safely eat food in their own home. These dorks.       

Ahhh tell me was so good. I like Infinie’s old style of music but I like this kind of softer edm music too. It’s like the stuff I usually like to listen to lol. Idk if that was a good description of the song but that’s kinda how I see it lol. And Sunggyu and Dongwoo were so good that comeback. Like that second verse was a Donggyu attack. I don’t know if I have a favorite concept from them really? They kind of have everything for every mood. But I have a running play list of their upbeat music.     

The stuff like Julia, Amazing, Lately, etc. I keep that playlist around when I’m having a hard time studying and stuff. It brightens my mood. As for english songs I kinda just….turn on the radio and find something I like haha. I don’t really have a preference with those. Ahhh I feel like I did a really bad job of getting to know you, I always just talk about myself haha. Tell me 5 random things that make you like or make you happy that you haven’t talked about!

Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry for taking forever and an age to reply back to you!!! I’m so sorry, and I don’t even have a good excuse like being busy with work, it’s just honest to goodness pure laziness on my part and not going on my laptop for forever. I hope you haven’t forgotten me and that you’ll reveal yourself!!

I hope you haven’t gotten busy again (you’re graduating this year right?). What are you focusing on in biotech? And I think you may be right about my professor meaning bioinformatics… I vaguely remember that term ^^;

You’ve certainly hopped around during your university years ^^ What countries did you visit in Europe? My parents surprised me by sending me to the UK for 2 weeks after my exams to join my sister there… It was amazing and I’ve always wanted to go there, but we ran out of time to hit everything we wanted to do. We couldn’t go to Ireland, which was my biggest disappointment. What is your most favourite memory from exchange? And what place did you like best?

I actually feel like a complete stranger… I don’t feel Canadian, Singaporean or Indian. I don’t really fit in any place completely, I’m a bit too traditional in Canada, too modern in India and Singapore… Well, I’m not exposed to the culture at all really. Funny thing… Singapore used to be not as well known when I was younger and I remember a kid trying to convince me it was part of the US. Even now, some people think it’s in India. The funniest is actually when I met Chinese international students, so many think that Singapore has only people of Chinese descent. When I explained that my dad’s family is from there and my mother from India, they thought my dad was Chinese.

What’s this whole City of Angels/Laser thing? I’ve seen mention of it, but I don’t get it… Did Sunggyu think the song was called Laser? (This shows up much I keep up with them, except for their music ^^;). You must have heard the album by now… So what’s your favourite? (Also, I didn’t know Sunggyu wrote that… Good to know and it makes me love it even more!)

Um… I think I started giffing around 2013 ish? Then I stopped while in uni, in fact my blog was basically inactive, and only just recently started fooling around on Photoshop again. I was quite atrocious in the beginning and am much fonder of my new stuff. But… I’m also quite lazy so I tend to not gif as much as I want to.

I 100% recommend MBLAQ goes to school. Joon and Mir are such jokesters. Sesame Player is still my favourite variety show to watch, all that screaming and backstabbing… And Sungyeol? He’s just too awesome. I would never have thought of injecting vinegar into bananas the way he did, that was a true genius move. Myungsoo’s, that was predictable, but that banana prank was just first class.

Do you prefer their upbeat songs more or is that just better to run to? My favourite upbeat song is Cover Girl… Have you heard the concert version where Sungyeol raps? I wish he would get a chance to do that in their songs, I think he raps pretty well.

I think we got to know each other pretty well? In fact, I too often think I wrote too much about myself.

5 things I like/make me happy… Hmm…

1. Being with my family - yes, we fight a lot, but we’re also really close and really stupid… My mother is crazy, my father is bullied… They’re what I missed most in uni.

2. I love airports/airplanes! As a child, I used to wish I could live in one ^^

3. Good books and movies… I love reading, but it’s so rare for me to find writing and plot that suits my taste. When I do, I devour the author’s entire works.

4. This is dorky… But I love learning ^^ Maybe it has to do with feeling smart? I love watching Jeopardy, especially if I get the answers right, but also to learn new facts.

5. I love puns… I quite literally cry with laughing over some of them.

Also, last post, but I saw your rant and I hope you’re feeling better :( I get the being introverted thing too. I’m pretty reserved and I like my alone time–there’s nothing wrong with it! I’m sorry you had to listen to all of it TT Please be happy!

Thank you for this! Ahh… Tumblr is my place to rant, but I tend to get over my anger quickly.                 

#I'm really sorry T_T #I hope you don't think I forgot about you or was ignoring you #I hate replying on my phone and then I would fall asleep as my laptop started up and then I haven't been online in the past week #Inspirit Buddy #Anonymous #Reply