Rejected Bad: Headstands
The following is a rejected script from an early season of Breaking Bad.
INT. JESSE'S BACKYARD - DAY
Jesse, Skinny Pete, and Badger are hanging out in the garden, goofing around and getting competitive doing headstands. The sun is shining brightly.
SKINNY PETE: Alright, boys, no more messing around! Time to prove who's king of the upside-down kingdom!
Jesse chuckles, getting into position for his headstand.
JESSE: You're all going down! Prepare to witness the greatness of Meth Boy!
BADGER: Oh, please, Jesse. You couldn't even balance a spoon on your nose.
They burst into laughter as Jesse successfully gets into a headstand position, showing off his skills.
JESSE: (Laughing) Watch and learn, boys!
Suddenly, as Jesse tries to maintain his upside-down posture, his head slips and gets STUCK in a gopher hole. He panics.
JESSE (CONT'D): Guys! Guys! I'm stuck!
Skinny Pete and Badger double over in laughter, holding their bellies.
SKINNY PETE: Dude, Meth Boy has met his match - the mighty gopher hole!
BADGER: What should we do, Pete? Should we help our buddy out?
SKINNY PETE: Nah, let's seize this golden opportunity.
Skinny Pete steals Jesse's pants and hands them to Badger.
BADGER: Let's teach Jesse a lesson he won't forget!
Skinny Pete and Badger burst into laughter once more and playfully start running away, leaving Jesse behind who is still stuck half naked in the gopher hole.
JESSE: Guys! Guys, come on!
As Jesse struggles to be released from the hole, Skinny Pete and Badger run away laughing hysterically until they are out of sight.
INT. JESSE'S BACKYARD - NIGHT
Jesse finally manages to free his head from the hole, though he looks dishevelled and annoyed.
He dusts off his hair, glancing around the empty backyard. A mischievous grin emerges on his face.
JESSE: Oh, it's on now, boys!
FADE OUT.
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I weigh over 100kg right now. Being able to do a headstand with all that weight pressing down on my neck and shoulders is very fucking impressive.
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Ahhh yes,I remember this well. No more #headstands for me after #neckfusion n #fracturedfemur YET STILL i #LOVEYOGA and DO #yogaeveryblessedday I call mine #brokelegyoga #yogaforlife https://www.instagram.com/p/CegV2mkLoCU/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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i know someone already did this but im just thinking really hard about warhammer and dungeon meshi crossover, even if its just in spirit with some space marines (and a reluctant tech preist) having to find their rations in the enemies they slay rather than imperium sanctified ones
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