#he loves him enough to let him go

[kennyomegasweave]

I've seen a lot of posts saying Nueng should have kept the bracelet or asking why he didn't just keep it and I just. He couldn't. He could not keep that bracelet and still leave. He wrote a goodbye note telling Palm he doesn't work for him, he doesn't want him to follow him, he wants him to meet someone and love them and be loved in return, but that can't be him. We know Nueng loves Palm. We know Palm love Nueng. We know they're the children of the sun and they were once glued up back to back. But Nueng thinks all that follows him is heartbreak and loss and that's all he can ever bring Palm, so he is willing to break both their hearts to keep Palm safe. It's misguided because Palm can't just walk away now. Palm knows they once had four legs and four arms. Even if his mom was still alive and his dad wasn't in jail, he can't just walk away from Nueng. But Nueng needs to break Palm so he stays away from him. So he breaks up with him in a letter after his mom dies and leaves in the night. And he leaves the bracelet, he has to leave the bracelet, because if he doesn't Palm might realize how Nueng still believes, even while breaking his heart, that they were once glued up back to back. And if Palm thinks Nueng still believe in their love, he will want to fight for them. Palm is a fighter, he's been fighting his whole life. And Nueng leaves needing Palm to fully believe his words and leave him alone and move on.

The tragedy of this show is we know neither of them will, or even can, move on. But they can't be together. Nueng can't just be a dude working on an island with Palm. Palm can't be Nueng's CEO house husband. They both love each other more than anything. But that doesn't mean it works. That doesn't mean they work. And so Nueng leaves the bracelet. And we all cry.

#never let me go #I have seen a lot of people mad at my boy Nueng but like #he truly believes he's doing the right thing #and like how can you say he isn't at least from his perspective #he has to leave palm all he's ever brought him has been sorrow #his mom is dead his dad is in prison he's not safe himself #nueng needs to leave palm because he loves him that much #he loves him enough to let him go #now palm doesn't want to be let go #and palm is most likely not gonna be like THANKS FOR DUMPING ME IN A LETTER AFTER MY MOM DIED #but Nueng is truly believing that Palm will read his letter with the bracelet and be like welp moving on #because remember Nueng doesn't think anyone would ever like him for him #and he def had to leave the bracelet or it would be a sign to palm that like #I DIDN'T WANT TO DO THIS I LOVE YOU BUT I WANT TO KEEP YOU SAFE #but Nueng doesn't want Palm to know that #because he knows Palm #he knows Palm would be like FUCK MY SAFETY I'M STAYING WITH YOU #so he has to leave the bracelet #he has to leave every trace of Palm's love behind #because he has to reject it so maybe just maybe Palm will believe him #and Palm will stay away from him and move on with some other person and be happy #but this is a show so it won't be happening but like dammit #Nueng isn't the bad guy here okay #and I'm in my feelings #obviously from these tags and this post #about how it seems like all of yall are making him that way #I am chris crocker levels of LEAVE NUENG ALONE LEAVE HIM ALONE lol #regular clyde #if this isn't the most coherent I am very drunk lol

[ruporas]

all I wanted was to save them... (ID in alt)

#nicholas d wolfwood #trigun #trigun maximum #tw blood #let me know if there's any other tags i need to use!!! not sure if it counts as gore #ruporas art #*vash voice* YOU ARE NOT WRONG/LOST WOLFWOOD!!!!!! #i think very often about ch 49 where wolfwood thought it was fr over for him for that brief moment. he was already bearing with so much #fatigue that it wasn't going to be enough for him to fight back properly.. and ough... augh..... for the first time after bearing that cros #someone saved him. someone saved himmmm AUGHHHH <-- guy who can't be normal about it even though its been 7 months since i read it #but he's suffered alone for so long and continued to do so because it's all he ever knew in those short years #and its devastating. his one and only desire was simple and it was still difficult for him to reach T_T #anyway... i love him... holds him tenderly in my palms

[vaguely-concerned]

the way garak looks at bashir as he puts all the clues together at the end of cardassians. the sheer 'look at that little twink go (affectionate, sexual overtones)' energy he manages to convey in the background there as bashir passionately does the presentation of their group project that garak did 80% of the actual work on. immaculate

#star trek ds9 #deep space 9 #star trek #garashir #elim garak #his lil face journey as they speak to the lady about rugal coming to the orphanage too. adorable. 'it's so over oh we're so back' #also the revelation that garak is high as a kite not only for this but for most of the first two seasons. hysterical #I love him so much already. #'yes yes I'm sure we're ALL very sad about the orphans or whatever. I wouldn't know I haven't experienced a natural emotion in years' #(let's hope he's at least fooling himself at this point) #ALSO also. sisko in his bathrobe in the middle of the night b/c 'so uh dad my unhinged new boyfriend wanted me to ask #if we could borrow the car. no he didn't say why. yeah I'm sure he has a driver's license he was like in the army or something #btw he snuck into my room while I was sleeping and I didn't notice a thing lmao isn't he cool???' #sisko you deal with so much all of the time and there aren't enough medals they could give you for it #bashir going 'tell me what's going on in your head or I stg I'll turn this runabout around'...... yes. yes wonderful

[turtleblogatlast]

I am once again reiterating that Leo could and should be a figure skater because what are ice skates if not twin blades? What is dual blade swordsmanship if not a dance-like performance? Using the skates as blades themselves could let Leo make portals be his ice rink no? I rest my case. ⛸️

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rottmnt headcanons #rise leo #would also like to add that he loves glam rock and unicorns! and what’s something glam rock unicorns and figure skating share #that’s right ✨glitter baby✨ #(his glam rock look unironically fits right in with figure skater attire ngl) #I also mentioned his incredible ability to hold a pose before which helps him here #plus his fighting style in general can easilyyy incorporate figure skating elements #I am this 👌 close to animating a quick gif to show what I mean by those ice skate portals #and I do specify figure skating over hockey because 1) hockey is CASEY’S thing 😤 and 2) hockey just. doesn’t fit Leo? not enough ✨pizzazz✨ #episode where the A-plot is Casey Sr showing her love for hockey and ending up playing a life or death game against yokai #she brings Raph in for help (since I like Casey & Raph friendship) and he gets the rest of the fam to help fill out the team #Casey Jr is especially excited but he’s never actually played hockey before #Leo tries to join and immediately accidentally makes a portal with his skates when he tries twirling to show off #the gang wins the match and the ep ends with Leo finally making it back completely beat up from accidental portals #the gang: wow we won! haha let’s go get hot chocolate it’s cold in here #leo: *desperately twirling over an active volcano* THIS IS THE OPPOSITE PLACE TO BE RIGHT NOW #actually to extrapolate on this more I really adore the idea of the boys’ abilities needing to be retrained as they grow #because their powers have the opportunity to grow #Mikey just randomly floating off and needing to be tethered down until he gets the hang of it lol #and stuff like that

[catgirljaneway]

(last images sourced from this wonderful post)

Voy + Textposts 11- Special Chakotay being a hater edition!

(Voy + Textposts 11) + (Voy + Textposts 13)

#trek thoughts #as he should! #i love how much of a hater chakotay is #i wish the writers had let him be more obvious about it #cause it's so fucking funny #you know when b'elanna got with tom he was beyond horrified #and i mean!! he's right!! #tom ISN'T good enough for her at all #truly tragic #chakotay was right all along and they ignored him #b'elanna probably didn't take his advice seriously cause of the whole weird throuple polycule thing he's got going on with tuvok and kathry #tuvok and chakotay dislike each other but also they hook up #they're both fighting for kathryn's attention but also it's homeorotic #chakotay what a guy #star trek #voyager #chakotay #b'elanna #janeway #tuvok #tom paris #chakotay x janeway x tuvok #star trek memes #star trek voy #star trek voyager #captain janeway #kathryn janeway #st voyager #star trek janeway #st textposts

[haunted-xander]

So. Fatebreaker, right? Ryne's biggest fears made manifest, daddy issues personified, yes?

He's an amalgamation of Thancred and Ran'jit, his face, his voice and his weapon is Thancred's, but his body, his fighting style and his words are Ran'jit's.

Throughout the fight Fatebreaker constantly makes comments about how only he can protect Ryne, only he can provide for her, only he has even the right to so much as stand beside her, to be in her general presence. He's possessive and obsessive, repeatedly asserting that she is HIS and his only. Which is exactly what Ran'jit says basically every time we encounter him.

But this time it's in Thancred's voice. This time it's with the voice and face of a man she actually cares about.

Ryne isn't scared of Thancred, she never has been. Even when she first met him she was barely even nervous (as clearly shown in Thancred's short story). There's a lot of different feelings happening between those two, but fear has never been one of them.

But now, after things have gotten so much better, she is scared of Thancred becoming like Ran'jit. Because if Thancred was just a little further gone, if he was just a little less compassionate, he would've. It wouldn't be hard for him to go down the same path as Ran'jit did, to be incapable of letting go of the ghost of that girl he loved so so much to the point he'd stubbornly grip anything close to her he could. He didn't, but the fact he could've is terrifying.

It makes his final words, words that are Thancred's, so very important. This is her deepest fears made manifest, but he still says he wants her to be happy. Her happiness not only matters, but is important to him.

#Now we -the audience- ofc knew Thancred was unlikely to go down that path #bc if theres one thing hes been consistent in even in his darkest moments its living up to his loved ones' wishes and legacies #the only time he even speaks against it is his conversation w minfilia in amh araeng #and thats more a case of all his (poorly) repressed grief and stress exploding than him actually meaning what he says #and trying to control rynes life after minfilia literally told him to just let her live her life goes directly against that #i think about fatebreaker a lot. as i do all things related to ryne & thancred #and to me its so important to note that hes more or less ran'jit with just enough thancred in him to be *too* thancred for comfort #its so. her greatest fear isnt even the thing thats been haunting her her whole life (being forced to fill in for minfilia) #its having her free will taken from her by the person she cares about the most (thancred) #and for him to be trapped in endless suffering because he cant move on #just like ran'jit did and was #its not even necessarily that shes all that scared of ran'jit himself #what shes scared about is caring about someone like that #because then she wont say no or try to be anyone but minfilia #(thats also why this fear appears specifically after things get better) #(because she was already ready to forsake herself if it eased thancred suffering) #okay im gonna stop now i need to sleep gnight everyone #ryne waters #thancred waters #ran'jit #final fantasy #final fantasy 14 #final fantasy xiv #ff14 #ffxiv #xander rambles #at this point i should make a tag for ryne ramble posts i make so many of them #tomorrow. maybe. if i remember #edit: i made it #xander being insane about ryne

[somegrumpynerd]

How absolutely wild must it have been for Nightmare to have like, minimum-to-no contact with mortals for hundreds of years and then the first two he has any regular close interactions with are Killer and Dust.

Like he must have a book in his castle somewhere of all the observations he kept like he was studying a new species

#UTDR #UTMV #Nightmare Sans #Killer Sans #Dust Sans #I could probably ramble for a while about the effect Killer had on him alone #But imagine being hurt by the world and carrying the grudge for hundreds of years while you wreak havoc all by yourself #And then you get one (1) roommate and he's so strange and unhinged but not at all what you expected #And then you get a second and he's so different again it's like they're different creatures even though they came from the same root world #And you get a third and he's a little more grounded but still has such wild needs and stipulations #By the time he got Cross he was probably onto his 3rd book of observations #If you dig around in Nightmare's library or office long enough I just know you can find at least one book where he's noted down what all hi #boys need and like and hate and what they refuse to do and how to handle them #Like someone leaving super detailed instructions for the care of their pampered beloved pet #Anyway Killer loves to joke to the other 3 that they should be nice to him because he ''let Nightmare adopt them'' #and he's not entirely wrong #Anyway I need to go to bed so I can work all day tomorrow (rip) goodnight gang!!

[death-by-landmine]

currently suffering from "everybody should love me and only me all the time love me love me love me" disease

#jiraiblogging #地雷系 #地雷女 #jirai kei #ぴえん #pien kei #jirai girl #landmine girl #but on the other hand if he so much as looks at another girl i go insane #i hate being aware of myself let me be insane and believe im right !!!!!!!! #grrr i hate him so !!! much !!!!! ♡ #how come im not enough huh ????? everybody loves me and only me so you should too. others arent even real its just us two anyways

[tswwwit]

I feel like if Dipper were ever reincarnated as a demon, he wouldn't fit in super well with the others. Yes, he's been raised to vie for power and step on everyone in his way using whatever means is necessary - it's the same toxic bizz as when he was a human, appealing to gender norms. He's tougher, scarier, more powerful (than ordinary humans, that is), but when it comes to asserting control - being Evil - he doesn't have it in him. Given enough time, I think he'd grow pretty vocal about leaving living things alone. NOT torturing organisms for the hell of it, or stealing people's souls, or conquering planets. Sure, he's a demon. That's no excuse to be a MONSTER.

It's a VERY unpopular opinion amongst neighboring demons, and rumor spreads fast about the Goody Two-Shoed Activist imp raining on everyone's blood-splattered parade, so much so that it makes it to Bill, who's immediately intrigued. Call it intuition, but only one soul's capable of overriding goddamn demon nature for some preachy bullshit about "Doing Good." Lucky for him, demons occupy the same plane of existence, so all it really takes to verify the guy is a snap of his fingers, and POOF! He's floating right next to him. Sure enough, Dipper's fashioned himself a new and improved demonic form, and it is lovely!

No one likes Dipper's kumbaya "Can't We All Just Get Along" ideology, but Bill's almost instantly smitten with the guy, whoever he is, so he's gotta be at least somewhat powerful. Demons take notice when the all-powerful Bill Cipher starts lending his time (and magic?) to some low-leveler like Dipper. Is he being blackmailed? Are they working together? No. Not possible. Bill doesn't "work" with anyone, save for whatever human catches his eye every few decades. Doesn't look to be doing him any benefit, either. The opposite, even. Lending power to a saint like Dipper only makes it harder to cause chaos, after all. Why would he actively go against his OWN best interest to cater some imp's? It's almost like he's. He's.

A henchmen.

(Bill's also 30% more affectionate the first month they reunite, because he still can't believe that his adorable little human husband came back as the same SPECIES as him! He'd never complain over having a sweet human to squeeze, but one with teeth and claws and cute pointy ears doesn't hurt).

#answers #I can't help but picture demon dipper starting out all like #I'm Bad 😡 I'm Mean 😡 I'm Evil As Heck!! 😡 #And still having a HUGE hatred for things that are Unfair or Unjust. One time he saved a kitten from a tree and got embarrassed about it #Eventually he just has to give into his nature and speak up about all the BULLSHIT he sees going on around him #Sorry Dippin' Dots even the society that 'raised' you can't prevent you from your do-gooder ways #Don't worry Bill loves you for the stupid idiot you are #Everyone is completely BAFFLED by Bill acting like a friggin' henchman though #I bet they don't even peg it as romantic interest at first. Dipper sure doesn't #He's thinking this is some Grand Scheme to convince him back into the evil fold #And to be fair Bill's very tempting in that respect. But not leaning as hard into it as he *could* be #Maybe he thinks Bill's trying to 'mentor' him for something. Seems like the kind of thing Bill would imply and let Dipper fill in the gaps #They're technically not the same SPECIES since Dipper's probably some human-shaped 'demon' #And Bill's originally from a two-dimensional weird universe. Technically speaking he's His Own Thing #Aside from whatever refugees escaped that plane. If any. #Demon covers a LOT of different beings that don't have much or any genetics in common #But you KNOW Bill's thrilled as hell that Dipper's Slightly More Immortal than usual!! This one's gonna last a WHILE #*slams fist on table* Give Dipper A Tail With A Tuft That Bill Can Pull To Be Annoying #Final thought: In this incarnation Bill might have been wondering where the hell Dipper got to since there's no human around #Given a long enough time he might even wonder if he was LOST #So you know that when Dipper reemerges on the scene everyone else was dealing with a VERY unhappy Bill Cipher for QUITE a while

[krotiation]

Feeling absolutely distraught over the face Rhys makes when he realizes just what he's gonna have to do to himself to cut Jack off

And Jack's face when he realizes that oh. This is actually happening. This is really it

#cant mansplain manspread manipulate yourself out of this one #one thing i will always love abt jacks writing is how you sorta get manipulated by him through the screen #despite knowing everything you know about him #and this scene + angels death segment is such good examples of that bc they really make you feel Bad #so imagine how rhysie feels when he has to literally rip jack out of his body right in front of him #while jack is pleading with him to stop #it doesnt matter that he tried to strangle him just moments ago because truly? things could have ended differently and thats what hurts most #and rhys is forced to learn that he cant “fix” jack or placate him enough to just let him go #rhack #txt #babe wake up new rhack ramble just dropped #im going insane

[alchemicaladarna]

Is anyone else thinking that the change in the egg quests probably let qbad die sooner than he should have?

This is just a theory, but I think qBad was supposed to live another week, if not at least through the weekend to grind for cookies and do quests still. He was very frantic about doing them yesterday and the day before.

QBad was prolonging his death by taking the meds. He had so much planning and work to do around the house for Dapper and Pomme he still needs neighbors he must build the machines and gather resources he still needs to feed Richas and Leo and Chunsik and Pepito--

But he doesn't need to do all that now. Maybe by seeing Richas, Em, and Dapper talk, a small voice told him, "the kids will be alright, Bad. It's time to go"

Maybe a part of him listened to the voice and believed it. His kids are going to be ok. There's so much he still wants to do and say but the important thing was at least they know he loves them. So very much. At least they know.

The kids are going to be alright Bad, and now it's time to let go.

#qsmp #qsmp badboyhalo #qsmp eggs #fuck man he loves the eggs so much and they love him back because he's their tio #practically like a second parent to a lot of them #the one constant is him making sure they are always ok and nothing bad will happen to them #they wont die of neglect now theyll be fine w/o cookies this week #they wont die to outside dangers he has a stasis set up noe #theyll be ok and that is enough assurance for him to let go

[americankimchi]

wish i knew what to do with this helpless frustration i feel every time i see people vilify the jedi for their way of life when the person doing the vilification doesn't even understand them properly. it's one thing to criticize and dislike them if you have an accurate picture of who they were and what they're trying to do vs. hating them because you straight up don't understand them at all 😭

#personal #this isn't vagueposting i'm just tired of seeing it every time i go in the tags or on youtube or on ao3 #literally if you boil the jedi down to the essentials it's just #''these are psychic empath space wizards wandering around the galaxy trying to establish a higher quality of life for everyone'' #a bunch of aragorns except anduril is a beaming blade of plasma #or gandalf with the ability to do backflips #the only hard rule they have is ''thou shalt not add misery to the world where you can remove it'' #everything else is just interpretations on that theme #''they're cold and unfeeling and they HATED ANAKIN and BAN LOVE'' #like WHERE in the WORLD are you getting this information #WHEREEEEE #SHOW ME YOUR SOURCESSSS #and don't say ''they ban attachments'' without understanding what that MEANS #ATTACHMENTS =/= LOVE #ATTACHMENTS ARE CHAINS THAT YOU USE TO DRAG OTHERS DOWN WITH YOU #YOU KNOW THE SAYING IF YOU LOVE SOMETHING YOU WILL LET IT GO? THAT'S IT. THAT'S ALL IT IS. #and where are u getting that they hated anakin do you think he'd be so torn up about betraying them all in ep 3 #if he was surrounded by people who hated him for over a decade like mans was IN TEARS #HE LOVED AND WAS LOVED BY THEM IN TURN #IT JUST WASN'T ENOUGH TO SAVE THEM IN THE END BECAUSE #CRUCIALLY #HIS ATTACHMENT TO PADME DRAGGED HER AND THEM AND EVERYONE ELSE DOWN WITH HIM #stop stripping anakin of his agency he made a CHOICE #star wars is ALL ABOUT CHOICE. THE CHOICE TO FALL IN EP 3. AND THE CHOICE TO RISE AGAIN IN EP 6. #like cmon fellas..... fellas cmon........

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Oh we are so BACK

When I tell you I saw this and died. HELLO?????

I keep hiding my face lahshjsdhjgfsaf HE HAS NO RIGHT. NO RIGHT AT ALL BEING THAT SEXILY INTENSE AAAAAAAAAAA

Anyway, I should probably try to make some attempt at describing the event since. If I don't I'll just be barking/crying/hiding my face for the next twelve hours.

Basically--and I'm not sure this is going to be across the board, but it held true for Napoleon and Sebastian at least--each suitor has a birthday event this year instead of a separate story. Comte's won't be released until tomorrow, but they have posted a preview.

From what I gather, he talks a little bit about himself and reveals parts of his past that haven't come to light in the game yet. There wasn't really enough to convey a coherent narrative beyond attending a party, but the line displayed here does get across the larger theme:

Comte: (I don't need momentary pleasure or ephemeral affection any longer. Now that I know love, there's nothing but you.)

He talks about how the aristocracy have thrown parties and extravagant celebrations for his birthday for most of his life. But none of it has ever really made him happy, largely because he knows that they are attempts to strengthen and broadcast power relations within high society. While I don't think he means it's entirely devoid of well wishes, I do think he sees it as a nexus of influence--and thus, by nature, impersonal. And honestly, I don't think he's wrong about that; the higher the echelon in social standing, the more it requires performance to maintain the position.

That being said, there is a fascinating flashback where he remembers a pureblood telling him about how falling in love with a human is an experience of another caliber entirely. My understanding is that Comte was still a fairly young vampire at the time, so he didn't really understand what the person was getting at. It seems like the other pureblood was trying to convey the difference in feeling, perhaps the fact that humans are more grounded in accordance with how they live--the reality and necessity of change.

After reading this--and the recent 5th bday story--I can absolutely see how change is something Comte has a complicated relationship with. He's known a certain way of life for so long, has constructed a sensibility of distant, rational maturity. After all the heartbreak of his youth, and two very acute traumatic events in his life, I can see why he'd be so afraid of broaching any kind of proximity with another person. Because on some level it's so much easier not to put your feelings on the line, to never have to fear devastating loss. And that's to say nothing of the worry of being unable to measure up on behalf of another person, of letting them down.

I'm so excited to see the rest of the contents, but something about the preview made me equal parts giddy and enamored (all I do is kick my feet with excitement LOL). I think what gets to me with Comte is that he truly does love companionship as a place to rest, a place where he can be honest about himself and his feelings without fear of ridicule (and the same goes for MC). In a world increasingly obsessed with surface level performances of power, status, and emotion, it's hard not to feel his exhaustion to the core.

Also, because these lines at the end more or less destroyed me in the best possible way:

MC: ...The you who had nowhere to belong no longer exists. In much the same way...Abel, I belong to you. Comte: ... Comte: I wish I could say to myself all those years ago, the me who kept indulging in such paltry things. Comte: Until you meet MC, you will never know love... The warmth of MC in my arms filled me with such joy I was near tears. (I don't need momentary pleasure or ephemeral affection any longer. Now that I know love, there's nothing but you.) The moment my lips found hers, the sweetness lit a fire deep in my body. Comte: These cute lips that melt against mine, the heat of your skin, the love that envelops me in your embrace--always leaves me so deeply in love with you.

#ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp comte #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp spoilers #LETS GO ABEL UNPACKING ALL THOSE COPING MECHANISMS #**pats the couch next to me** CONFIDE IN ME #but in all seriousness i really do love how raw his relief and happiness feels #to have spent all of those years trying to subsist on emotional crumbs and numbing himself #and mc is so real for just gathering him in her arms and holding him tight QUEEN MOOD!!!! #i really really really love that general recurrence in his stories too #of how he always feels so isolated and out of place even when he's surrounded by people #yet all it takes is mc saying 'you belong to me--just as I belong to you. you're never truly alone :>' #to make him both overjoyed but also unhinged with so much love for her--to feel alive #also man........MAN..... #him looking back at who he used to be vs who he is now #im so caught between memeing like 'you know what that is? growth!' #but also lowkey weeping from the fact that he feels loved enough to look back and fully admit it wasn't quite happiness #that he was just surviving the only way he knew how--not really living #ABEL THE THINGS YOU DO TO ME #CMERE LOVER BOY #comte propaganda #fangdad propaganda #baguettosaurus #literally october was always my favorite month but its even better now that it just becomes a comte-loving festival for me #truly all the joys of monsterfking all tg

[schmweed]

#David Tennant #Alec Hardy #Ellie Miller #Broadchurch #my gifs #Ellie just keeps sparing him any direct eye contact outside of serious work-related situations #And he only looks at her when she's looking away #The way Ellie lights up when she realizes what he's saying. #That 'mostly' from him is the kindest most genuine and delightfully playful way of expressing how much she means to him #Love how she lets him know she doesn't believe he lost his phone and therefore her number and yet doesn't give him a hard time abt it #he's too brilliant a detective not to have memorized her number or found a way to say hi #It's just that she probably thinks he didn't care enough #I think Tess gave him an ultimatum -- stop contacting his outstanding Miller if they're going to make this work or Tess won't try #How many times do you think he looked at Ellie's number when he was alone and ached to contact her in any way #Especially given how concerned he was abt her at the end of S2 #But trying to fix the family came first and honestly he's a wonderful human to do that for his daughter's sake #I think he's relieved Ellie would never in her wildest dreams suspect that's why -- but he still wishes he could tell her. #Complicated doesn't begin to cover it. But he decides basking in her presence for their endless hours of work has to be enough. Oh Alec. #Aww. Look at Ellie's beaming face. #I love them so much! <3

[bizarrelovesquare]

Avatar: The Last Airbender

s3 ep 09, Nightmares and Daydreams

#avatar the last airbender #atlaedit #maiko #zuko #mai #gif #evie's gifs #this scene is one of my favorites ever actually! she's trying to cheer him up in her own mai way with her dry humor he knows so well #like 'yeah babe let's boss people around because we can <3' #but he's so caught up in worrying about what his abusive father thinks of him that he's not going to be able to get out of his thoughts rn #and then in the last image she realizes that. she's powerless in this situation and love & distraction aren't enough to automatically fix i #the situation is bigger than them and it's heartbreaking for both of them #(god how do people not enjoy this relationship?? i could talk about them all day but that's just me)

[astarlightmonbebe]

it's easy to read the situation between li tongguang, ruyi, and yuanzhou as a love triangle on a superficial level, but looking even one step further, it's clear that there's no triangle about it. li tongguang is obsessed with ren xin; ning yuanzhou is devoted to ren ruyi. ltg's obsession is fervent and all consuming, but it's not devotion. like ruyi herself notes, his feelings to her are on the basis of her as a mother figure in his life, as a replacement for what he never received from his mother. is there an element of romantic/sexual love/desire to it? maybe. more likely he's deluded himself into thinking that, because the truth is, it's doubtful that ltg even understands what love is (platonic, filial, familial, romantic, all of the above, etc), because he has no basis for understanding. ruyi's teachings and actions towards him are the closest thing he has to hold up as an example. what he wants is ren xin, is a replica of the master he had. he doesn't want ruyi, because he doesn't actually care about ruyi. therefore, he doesn't care if she's sad, angry, mad; he just can't bear her 'abandoning' him. we saw this way back when she first meet and left him, both at thirteen and seventeen. although he distrusts her first, she saves his life and cares for him in the way no one else has, hence her first being raised on a platform in his mind. when she leaves for good, ending their master-disciple relationship/training, even though it's for official business and she's not abandoning him, in his mind that's exactly what it is. so now that she's in his life again, he won't let her leave again. he was powerless before, a child with no proper name, but now he's a recognized member of the imperial family, a man who can meet her as 'equals' (even when that's far from the truth). as a child, he could only cling to her legs and beg her, but now he has the power to keep her by his side. it's telling that when he finally gets confirmation of her identity, it's not ning yuanzhou he seeks to harm (even though he detests him and their relationship), but yang ying. yang ying is ruyi's new disciple, and as ltg doesn't know she's a woman, he only sees her as his direct replacement.

ning yuanzhou, on the other hand, is devoted to ruyi. he wants to build a new life and future with her, instead of slotting her into a spot in the life he already has. he's someone who accompanies her on walks and makes her midnight snacks, who holds her when she needs to be held and lets her go when she needs to do things on her own. when she speaks her mind, he listens, even when it makes him discontent/it's not what he wanted/wants to hear. he sees her unabashedly as his equal, and though he acknowledges her skills and abilities, or points out her naivety, he never does it to belittle her; to him, she is his peer, deserving of the highest honor and respect. he trusts her to have his back, and she has come to trust him to have her. he did what she might have thought no man would ever do: he proved himself reliable, so she came to rely on him. yuanzhou gives her freedom and autonomy as both ren ruyi and ren xin. of course they run into problems, but they both learn and grow from them, as individuals and as a couple. yuanzhou's belief in her is unwavering, but adaptable, whereas ltg's is unwavering, but frozen in time, disallowing for any new information to be presented. yuanzhou works with ruyi to accept the changes thrown her way; he seeks the core behind her actions in order to better understand her. li tongguang cannot accept the changes in ruyi's character, because they run contrary to the master he has on a pedestal in his mind.

what li tongguang wants is to return to the past, but yuanzhou offers ruyi the promise of a future, even one that might never come to fruition. there's no triangle about it.

#star stumbles #my thoughts #a journey to love #一念关山 #cdrama #written right after watching ep 26 #hope i explained it well #honestly i have a lot more thoughts about this ep and ruyi/ltg but that's still a separate post that will happen. well sometime #maybe after ep 32 idk #it's just the juxtaposition between entering a room that is a shrine to the person she is trying to leave behind #and going home to a man who makes her wonton soup and accompanies her on her revenge journey #who offers his own insights and thoughts but lets her lead the way when it comes down to it. #he gives her ultimate control over her own journey. and ruyi who has never had that freedom of course is drawn to him #oh and one more point that didn't make it in #ruyi's confrontation about how ltg is unwilling to give up his power and success is further proof of his obsession =/= love or devotion #it's not that ning yuanzhou WOULD necessarily give up those things if she asked him to #but he would respect her enough to let her go if he knew he was unwilling to give up his position #of course nyz right now is someone who is planning on retiring and living a quiet life away from it all #which is appealing to ruyi #but ltg obviously won't give up his name and success. he wanted an imperial name but now that he got it the avenue has opened up #we saw his big dreams early on in eps 4-5 (before the character butchery...though i can't really call it that since it makes sense #but still drives me insane) #and of course he won't! for a neglected illegitimate child with no power even gaining a sliver of it is just the beginning #and ruyi is honestly so far from the court in that she might have been close with empress zhaojie #but her understanding of the court is very ignorant. not in a bad way but she was a weapon so of course she didn't have to understand that #she just struck when told to. the power games of the court are basic knowledge but they still shock and confuse her #so it's also a thing about living two different lives and different paths #even though yuanzhou and her are on different ones theirs are still compatible #at this point in their lives. as they said earlier if they had met earlier they probably would be trying to kill each other