#he even says greg is a joke; will fail; will fuck up; so what use does he have for tom other than companionship. other than love?

[gregoftom]

pretty sure i’ve seen romance movies with scenes like this

#tomgreg #where do i even start with t his horseshit okay here we fucking go. #so tom's first instinct is to go to greg when he's on shaky ground with shiv. the only way he feels safe is to have GREG with him. #who tf would want greg as an attack dog??!?!? lets be fucking real. when he says that i think he means just a dog. just someone loyal. #who loves him and won't dick him around. i think he's pretty tired of it by now. #he wants an alliance with like. ok in this show who would you pick to ally with. i love greg but he's abso useless in terms of skills that #would keep you safe. if anything TOM would keep HIM safe. in fact tom himself says who else has taken care of you. literally spells it out. #he even says greg is a joke; will fail; will fuck up; so what use does he have for tom other than companionship. other than love? #a dog might do tricks for you but your main reason for getting one is usually love. right? at least it should be. it would be in tom's case. #and don't even fucking get me STARTED on ''do you wanna come with me? ...sporus?" like girl. #you know what you told him about nero and sporus right. and now you're saying to him; yeah i was talking about you. #you and me. you're my favourite and i wasn't joking when i said i'd marry you. #the whole while tom is asking greg to be his attack dog his fuckin. eyes and expression we get it you're in love with him. like it's ridic. #and all this coming with phrasing it sounds like they're fucking ELOPING. I HATE IT!!!!!! SHUT UP! stop saying that fucking shit god. god #they are so annoying. anyway #the way tom's voice breaks as he says he has things to do [what things. will i find out later.] and the deal and!! #what am i gonna do with a soul anyways... i have you what do i need it for. and as that paragraph said somewhere. he castrates his soul. #then they giggle and are fucking annoying and greg'S HANDS LOOK LIK EHE'S ABOUT TO IDK. HUG TOM? AROUND THE MIDDLE MAYBE #or do something else. and then they just hug instead and i fucking. ugh. i've had enough tbh good fucking bye

[grlstupid]

different but the same

Jesse Armstrong said it was a tragedy, but in a way it felt like the Roy siblings were finally free with the sale of Waystar. Somehow when they were confronted with the reality that they would never get what they wanted it felt like they would finally have a chance to become human again, to heal from the trauma their father passed on to them. Connor would never have to beg for approval, Kendall would never be CEO, Roman would never be beaten again, and Shiv for a moment had all the power in the world. 

People seem to compare Succession to Arrested Development, and in a superficial way, they are similar. 4 siblings, vying for power in their family company, even though said company is, from the audience’s point of view, doomed to fail. Emotionally distant parents, crimes committed by executives being covered up by the company, weird sexual tension between cousins (though at least Tom and Greg are only related through marriage). In some ways, the shows mirror each other. But the audience doesn’t root for members of the Bluth family. We don’t feel sorry for them, because we see their trauma depicted within a comedic setting. When Buster loses his hand, it’s played off with a recurring bit from the doctor who uses common phrases incorrectly, which changes the meaning of his words. With the Roy siblings, we see the symptoms of their childhood trauma, Roman excusing his father’s physical abuse by blaming himself, saying that it was his fault because he “was fucking annoying.” 

Because of the absurdity of Arrested Development, it’s hard, if not impossible, to relate to the characters. But with Succession, we can see ourselves in these emotionally stunted adult children. Siobhan, sabotaging her relationship because she feels she’s undeserving of Tom’s love, simultaneously pushing him away and giving him everything he wants. She consistently shows him her worst qualities instead of her best, manipulates him and is unable to show any vulnerability. She goes to him in her weakest moments, and yet in those moments she can only bring herself to act cruelly towards him. In a way, she’s the reason he became her father.

Tom was able to become Logan because Kendall never could be. Logan was addicted to power because he didn’t grow up with it, while Kendall never had to struggle the same way. Of course he still has hardships, he has an inferiority complex, was clearly neglected as a child, and goes through major depressive episodes. We never see him attempt suicide, but we see him in moments where it’s implied he’s considering it, as if he doesn’t know how to feel better about his situation, so he reacts in the most extreme way. In some ways Kendall is still a toddler, he throws tantrums when things don’t go his way, and seems to function better when someone else is enforcing a routine on him. Because he wasn’t raised by his parents, he never grew up in the ways that matter; in the first episode his ex-wife jokes about him using cocaine in front of his children. Nobody taught him to make good choices because nobody cared enough to do so, or they didn’t know how because they never learned themselves (looking at you, Connor). 

Connor may be the most interesting of the Roy children. In some ways, he seems to be the most well-adjusted, but we see him crack under pressure, which explains his lack of employment. It makes sense when you consider how his childhood was different from his siblings; his mother had a mental health crisis, and though we never really learn all the details, the only reason people are forcibly institutionalized is when they physically harm themselves or others, and we know that he lived with his mother when she was sent to the facility where she presumably still lived, if she was alive during the events of the show. Children of sick parents rarely grow up to be healthy adults, and Connor is not an exception to the rule. He parents his younger siblings to give them something he never had, he take Willa away from society so he can have all her attention, instead of fighting for scraps of love like the rest of his siblings. His bid for the presidency is delusional, but he’s so far removed from reality that he genuinely believes he can win and when he loses, he still manages to see his failure as a success. 

Connor also gives Roman his only happy childhood memory. It’s not clear whether Roman was the only one physically abused as a child, or if he just the most common target of Logan’s anger. He’s often compared to a dog, and feels like he isn’t worthy of love. He clearly still has some affection for Logan, which can sometimes confuse the audience, but then we see brief moments of Logan with Roman. Caroline says at one point that Logan “never saw anything he loved that he didn't wanna kick”. This seems to be the core of Roman’s relationship with his father; he keeps going back to Logan because he associates love with pain. We see it again in Roman’s final moment alone in the show with Kendall. Ken hugs Roman, and the hug turns painful and somewhat violent, but Roman doesn’t fight it. He leans in, because he can’t go to his father, but in that moment Kendall proves to be a good enough substitute in that moment.

#sucession #tw: suidice #tw: child abuse #i could say so much more but my movie ended and it's 1:30 in the morning

[sigurdjarlson]

I want to see tom try to win greg back after going too far. I want too see him jealous and possessive, sure, but I'm also just really curious to see how far is too far for greg. he's been harassed, manipulated, assaulted by tom and he just bounces back. he's blackmailed and manipulated tom to, don't get me wrong. I just want to see the greg who got mad at the roy's for the sprinkles thing get mad at tom -- seriously -- for like...anything? and I want all of this to happen while shiv files for divorce because she's my skrunkles. tom's breakdown era on my s4 wishlist

I would genuinely be so interested to see a scenario like this play out and I don’t think it’s impossible it could happen in canon honestly

Greg does seem to bounce back but given how many times Nicholas has talked about the resentment he feels for Tom because of his treatment of him (and their unbalanced power dynamic) I don’t think he’s as unbothered as he comes across

Tom has treated Greg unarguably pretty horribly. Greg isn’t innocent either but Tom has been downright abusive at times. Greg uses that word himself actually to Logan. “Abusive workplace environment” or whatever

The selfless gestures that come after some of the worst of it don’t erase that.

And I think back to the infamous “Greg thinks he could do better than Tom” interview with Nic. Here’s the thing..when it comes to how horribly Tom treats him sometimes? He can do better. Greg doesn’t deserve that. No one does. If he was willing to leave the Roy bubble he could find someone better.

I of course want them to be toxic and codependent together so i don’t actually want Greg to go anywhere lmao. However would I blame Greg if he did? No.

Tom has gotten better but he’s still awful sometimes and sadly who knows if it’s enough to erase the shit he’s already done.

And also I remember Nic talking about how Greg looks at Tom who’s marriage is failing and who’s desperate and broken and he thinks “I don’t want to end up like you” He sees Tom for the mess that he is.

“He’s just scared and lonely I think..”

I think it’s also important to remember the one interview where Nic says there is a deep love there underneath everything…but also that resentment might overpower that.

Greg does love and care for Tom canonically but his feelings for Tom are also mixed with a lot of resentment and anger.

If Tom doesn’t continue to treat Greg more equally and just generally better. Greg is going to bite back. Whether it’s just by bailing completely or screwing him over I don’t know.

And Tom and him have been improving on the relationship front but Tom has a tendency to revert back to old behaviors when he’s angry or hurt.

The best example I think is the finale. Greg says no to Tom at first pretty much and it’s because of the way Tom asked. “I need you to be my attack dog” and the expression Greg makes and the way he unenthusiastically repeats it tells you immediately he’s not happy with the comparison or the proposal

He does not want to be Tom’s dog anymore. (The dog metaphor/motif returns)

He wants to be Tom’s equal and I think sometimes that’s hard for Tom to stomach because putting them on truly equal ground means giving Greg the power to leave him.

And he might.

Greg gets a lot of shit for his “I’m kind of a big deal now” but I don’t think people understand what he’s doing there. He’s not bragging for the sake of bragging. I don’t think he even really believes it. He’s negotiating. He’s saying no I’m worth more than being your attack dog, offer me something better or I’m out.

That’s what you do in this world. You build yourself up as more important than you are so people offer you better options. Doesn’t matter if it’s true. We’ve seen Tom do it a lot. He’s very peacock esque that way.

And Tom initially doesn’t respond well to Greg doing that. He immediately reverts to kicking the dog. “You’re a fucking joke.” And that genuinely pisses Greg off you can tell.

What Tom is doing is not a genuine moment of making sure Greg isn’t getting too cocky..which is how some people paint it? it’s to make him feel small and worthless and dependent on him again so he doesn’t leave or reject him.

He slips back into his worst habits for a moment. He’s trying to put him in his place. Beneath him. (It’s why he doesn’t acknowledge that he arguably did WORSE in front of congress)

You can tell it’s not this “I’m worried you’re getting too cocky” moment because he Tom is visibly angry when he realizes Greg is beginning to reject him. He says this out of anger. He lashes out.

If Greg knows he deserves better than to be treated the way that he does he might leave.

Except his bullying doesn’t work this time. Greg gets pissed and is still resistant to the idea.

So he has to change tactics and he does by telling Greg what he can gain from saying yes. He does when he reminds him that he’s the only one who’s looked after him

Greg only says yes when he’s at least kind of assured he’s not going to be Tom’s punching bag/lackey anymore. However whether Tom can stick to that I don’t know because like I said it would mean giving Greg the power to leave. (And Greg has already tried to leave which shows that he was pretty done with Tom’s shit even back then)

This is a dog who is tired of being kicked by everyone around him.

Tom could very well push him to his breaking point eventually. How he’d do that I’m not too sure. Maybe he starts treating him like he does in s1-s2 again (and it’s worth noting that even though he’s been somewhat better he still doesn’t treat him that great. He insults him constantly and I don’t think Greg appreciates that kind of “joking” around)

If he tries to interfere in Greg’s career? That might hit be the last straw because Tom has shown himself to be selfless when it comes to Greg sometimes but safe room shows there’s a limit.

A healthy reaction would be to let Greg go. He says explicitly he’s not happy here. Tom can’t let go of him and that’s why he flips the fuck out.

I don’t think Tom will ever be able to “if you love him let him go” because the harsh truth is he needs Greg.

He gets Greg to stay by praising him and offering him more but at first Greg is adamant on leaving to the point of blackmailing him (which he genuinely didn’t want to do)

The point im trying to make is Tom could still push Greg to his breaking point. Him betraying Tom next season seems almost inevitable (even though I think it’s overdone and too obvious but oh well) as Greg continues on his corruption arc

He might just do it out of greed too since this is a corruption arc and Greg has proven himself to be very self serving and focused on his own survival.

But also..I think people forget that it could be Tom who fucks Greg over too?

He’s capable of it. We know he is if he feels hurt or rejected. (Or maybe even if he has to choose between everything he’s built and being the new Logan and Greg. I can’t say with 100% certainty which he’d choose)

And the thing is Tom would expect Greg to stick around after because Greg does tolerate his shit a lot of the time. He’s tolerated Tom being downright horrific to him.

More likely though I think is he panics because Greg is trying to leave for whatever reason (or he sees Greg is going in another direction) and completely ruins/sabotages his prospects to keep him by his side.

Him sabotaging his career just so he won’t leave him might be the last straw.

It’s also worth noting I think it’s very likely he’d do the same thing if Greg got into a relationship. I could see him breaking them up if he realizes he’s losing Greg.

Thats a betrayal in a way. It’s selfish. Especially if it’s a situation where Greg finds himself actually happy.

In the end Tom is not a good person. Nether is Greg. They’re both getting progressively worse. So they both might screw each other over in the end. Who knows

The thing is….that doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. Because succession is all the more tragic when you acknowledge these characters do love one another and hurt each other anyway. God most of them don’t know how to love in a healthy way.

They’re all horrible people in the end though. There’s good there too in most of them (i don’t want to be too reductive) but it’s metaphorically beaten of them. There’s no room for love or morality in the life they lead. It can’t exist there. That’s the point of the show in a lot of ways.

Got a bit off topic there because I have been thinking about how the show will end for all these amoral bastard characters a lot lately and it’s definitely not the happy ending my soft heart wants aaa…that’s what fanon is for I suppose ;)

But yeah I think it’s plausible that Tom could eventually push Greg to a breaking point. (And I think losing Greg would absolutely destroy Tom)

Personally I’d love to see Tom broken and more or less begging Greg not to leave..and I’d be interested to see if he can convince him to stay once he’s hit that point

#asks #succession asks

[spaceskam]

a little bit of belmanes for @excusemyfrenchgh ​ and you’re probably asleep or going to sleep because time zones, so, like, good night/morning depending on when you see this aslkdjfalkdjf

ao3

There was something convenient about having two Manes men on their side.

Alex and Greg were both ungodly intelligent, quick-witted, and good looking. Together--especially after they'd gotten comfortable with each other again--they were an unstoppable force. They could get anything done in an impressive timeframe and even found free time to add in a few jokes. Michael had gone full heart-eyed over it after a couple of meetings and Isobel had to admit he wasn't alone. It  was  charming.

Greg in particular had already found himself in Isobel's good graces long before he started working with them, but now she felt a little more obsessed with him every time she saw him. He'd make the trip out there every weekend and never failed to text Isobel on the way to say  something.  Whether it was to ask what her favorite kind of candy was or if she liked bubble tea, he would always show up with something. At first, he'd bring something for everyone, but that changed a couple of months in when he brought her flowers because they reminded him of her. Then they'd started to text a bit more reliably and Isobel felt like a teenager.

"How do I know if he likes me back?" she asked. Michael took a deep breath.

"Are you seriously asking me this? We're not twelve. Also, you're one of the most confident people I've ever met, just ask him," Michael said. Isobel rolled her eyes and scrunched up her nose. He wasn't really a good person to ask anyway, he'd screwed up his relationship with Alex all while  knowing  they were in love. He wouldn't know how to tell if it hit him in the face.

"I just need to get in the perfect situation where he knows I'm interested," Isobel said, staring at her phone and trying to decide what to say. Greg had let her know he was going to work out and so she had around thirty minutes left to come up with a good response. "I think I'm going to change into something that looks like I also work out and send him a sexy selfie."

"I'm leaving," Michael said before she could finish her sentence, grabbing his things and standing up. She scoffed in mock-offense.

"Do you think I'm too old to send thirst traps?" she asked. Michael looked more than a little scandalized at the idea of that and started heading for the door.

"Bye!"

Isobel laughed and slid off the chair and headed towards her bedroom. It felt like a solid idea, as good as any. She changed into something that she would typically go to yoga with her mom in and maybe splashed a bit of water on her face to give the impression that she had actually done something. It took her about ten minutes to get a picture worth sending.

And, it was worth it, because she got one back.

Greg's response was him from the shoulders up and from a hellish middle-aged man angle, but he made it work due to his smile and the fact that he was tinted red from exertion and glistening with sweat. It came with the message of  'great minds think alike'  and it was cheesy and didn't add anything to the conversation and Isobel found herself stomping excitedly like a teenager. She liked that feeling. She never really got to experience that before.

When she was an actual teenager, she'd been too scared to date anyone considering the whole alien thing. And then with Noah, it'd all moved so quickly. They met and within the year they were married despite all the questions from her brothers which, honestly, should've been a red flag. It didn't matter. She was allowing herself to feel it now.

For the next couple of days, they sent pictures back and forth and if some were a little more risque than the others, neither of them mentioned it. Isobel got pictures of him in bed, of a burn scar on his hip (totally relevant because she was baking), of him in his cute little teacher outfit with his cute little button-ups. In return, she sent him full body mirror pictures of her outfit each morning, of her in the bath after a bath bomb (totally relevant because he asked what they looked like), of her drinking coffee each morning to show off her collection of mugs. It was  easy  and fun and Isobel was on top of the world.

"You look happy," Michael said as she strolled up to him with bagels and coffee in hand. He wiped his hands on his jeans and she was in too good of a mood to think about how gross it was as he reached for his coffee.

"I  am  happy," she announced, "Greg is coming down today and I'm going to make a move."

"Please not in front of me," Michael said. She rolled her eyes.

"As if you don't do gross shit in front of all of us all the time," she said. Before he had any time to argue, she spoke again. "Don't worry, I don't plan to do anything to hurt your precious little eyes."

"Thank you," he said, giving a playfully exasperated sigh. Isobel smiled and took a sip of her coffee.

The day passed slowly with her anticipation. She refused to let the idea of rejection enter her mind. He was into her and she knew it. And, well, if he wasn't, it didn't matter.

They all met up at Alex's cabin in the woods where they always met up since Max blew up the last one. That being said, he was allowed to know where the cabin was and he typically joined their get-togethers via video chat. It was Alex's rule and Isobel personally found it hilarious.

Greg showed up later than everyone else like always and Isobel met him at the door, flashing a smile and receiving a shy one in response. He held out a mug with a dragon design on it.

"I saw this, thought you'd like it," Greg said. Isobel smiled as she took it from him.

"Thank you, I love it."

No one commented on it seeing as they'd stopped finding it joke-worthy after the first few times and they quickly got to work. Alex and Greg got out their computers. Alex the more tech-savvy of the two, but that didn't mean Greg didn't know what he was doing.

They spoke of Mr. Jones, Deep Sky, Project Shepard, the overwhelming and looming threat of literally everything, etc. It'd become something redundant at this point, but Isobel didn't care if it meant seeing Greg every weekend.

An hour in, he rolled his shoulders and tilted his head as if it was starting to get uncomfortable. Isobel saw her way in.

"Here, let me help," she offered, moving behind him and putting her hands on his shoulders. If his cheeks and his neck started to burn red, Isobel didn't say anything.

Keyword: Isobel.

"Oh, for fuck's sake, get a room," Rosa scoffed. Michael and Alex both snorted, keeping their eyes off of Isobel and Greg. Isobel tried not to act embarrassed. She  wasn't  embarrassed. 

"Maybe we will," Isobel said easily. Greg took a deep breath and she grinned. 

"Oh, God," Max sighed through his video chat. Isobel didn't back down though, dragging her thumb from between his shoulder blades and up to the base of his neck as Greg let out another breath.

"Don't let me stop you, get back to work," Isobel said easily.

And they did, sort of. Greg stopped typing at some point, his eyes closing and his head drooping forward as he let her dig into his shoulders. She didn't stop even when her hands started to hurt.

"Alright, you two are the worst, go home," Alex laughed. Isobel tilted her head and blinked innocently. 

"What ever do you mean?"

"Yeah, we'll go," Greg agreed, standing up and closing his laptop in one swift motion, "I'll drive."

Isobel's eyes widened a bit and she looked at Michael, raising her eyebrows. He rolled his eyes and stuck his tongue out at her, but she didn't pose any argument to leaving. She gladly went along with it.

"So," she said as she said in the passenger seat of his car, "Should I show you the way to my house?"

Greg looked over at her for a moment and nodded. "I could reciprocate."

And because Isobel liked to have fun, she said, "Reciprocate what?"

Greg took a deep breath and smiled, shaking his head as he backed up to turn the car around and drive out of the woods.

"Literally anything you want."

"I like the sound of that."

"Me too."

To say the least, Isobel lost any doubt that he liked her back.

#belmanes #belmanes fic #isobel evans #gregory manes #roswell new mexico #my fic

[planetsam]

Hmm I’d be interested in your take on how they process all this mess and work it out. I’d love some Gregory manes wingman assistance to help them get back together

“My brakes are acting funny.”

Micheal bites back his grumpy sigh. He can blame it on sleep depravation. Greg saved his life, the least he can do is make sure his breaks are working properly. Even though the truth is he’d rather have an entire break from the Manes clan. Life saving brothers included.

“Sure I can take a look,” he says.

“I appreciate it,” Greg says.

Michael nods and gets his stuff together. Greg stands there, doing the thing Alex does where he’s perfectly still and completely unrelaxed. Alex does it. Now Michael knows for sure where he got it from. Michael sighs and drops his tools and turns.

“You can just tell me I was a dick,” Michael says, “leaving during Alex’s song? It was a dick move.”

Something like respect shines in Greg’s eyes and it surprises him how much he likes seeing it there.

“I was actually coming to see if you were alright,” Greg says, “I know what it feels like to walk away from Alex.”

“Yeah, it’s not the first time I’ve done that,” Michael mutters.

Greg nods. Again it’s really like seeing an older version of Alex. Michael always wondered how Alex managed to appear like a warped version of his father, especially when he was in his military uniform. Looking at Greg, he doesn’t have to. It’s not a warped version of Jesse, it’s the older Manes Alex has been emulating all these years.

“Is it the last?” Greg asks. Michael swallows and wishes that he had an answer. Greg doesn’t look disappointed, but Michael almost wishes he would. A faint smile that is not very comforting comes to Greg’s lips, “if it was, I’d tell you that the ‘dick move’ wasn’t just leaving during the song.”

“I’m not good for him,” Michael says, “not right now.”

“Who decided that?” Greg asks. Michael fumbles with whether or not the question is rhetorical, “I’m guessing it wasn’t Alex. All things considered.”

“Alex doesn’t always know what’s good for him.”

Even Greg can’t fully deny that one and the smile he gives is bitter but genuine, something Michael can’t help but reciprocate. Anyone whose loved Alex understands that. It’s part of loving him, even though it never gets any easier. Loving Alex usually means trying to keep him safe and happy—take the occasional breather, maybe eat every once in a while. But trusting that Alex knows what’s good for him is a whole other thing.

“So what would make you good for him?” Greg asks.

“Huh?” Michael looks at him, waiting for a sign he’s joking but Greg’s smile is gone and he’s really fucking serious.

“I asked what would make you good for him,” he says, “if you know you’re not, do you know how you would be? And what you would do to be there?”

Michael opens his mouth and then closes it. Saying he should be successful and stable, with a job and a college degree all seems insufficient. Saying he wants to have a house so Alex can come home and a name so Alex doesn’t have to grimace when he signs his seems so far off he guesses they’ll be old and grey by the time he accomplishes any of it. He opens and closes his mouth again and then has to shake his head. Greg gives away nothing as he nods. Michael has every reason to trust him but some part of him is still perversely glad that he doesn’t have a tool in his hand when he does.

“We both know my brother doesn’t love lightly,” Greg says, “none of us are wired that way. Now I don’t know what your plan is. I think you want to be with my brother and I think you’re willing to work to get there—“

“I am,” Michael cuts in. Greg gives him a look that has him locking his lips.

“But you’ve set Alex up to have his heart broken. Again.”

Michael winces.

That’s the thing, saying if Alex dates someone else they can be even—that’s bullshit. And they both know it too. Alex doesn’t date in half measures. Hell he and Michael haven’t dated properly and he hasn’t done half measures there either. He loves Alex and he knows Alex feels the same way. He also knows there have been times when the passion between them has been so toxic he’s stunned any of the love has made it through. Michael isn’t much better at the half measures thing. Which makes the realization all the worse.

“Shit,” he swears loudly, barely resisting the urge to throw the nearest tool. Greg looks relieved he caught on and less than thrilled at him swearing. Michael doesn’t care, “we needed a clean break,” Michael explains.

“Did you talk about that?” Greg asks. Michael looks away. Greg shakes his head, “it’s a little ironic how you know all our dark family secrets and can’t talk about your relationship.”

“It’s hysterical,” Michael snaps back, “shit,” he repeats, “I didn’t want to do this again,” he looks at Greg, “you gotta know I didn’t want to hurt him again.”

Greg gives him a hard look that is two thousand percent protective older brother. If Michael wasn’t so in love with Alex, he’s pretty sure he’d cave to it. The real irony is that of the Manes men who have threatened him to stay away from Alex, Greg is far more terrifying. Jesse may have done monstrous things but everyone still came out of it alive. Greg killed him to keep Alex safe. Michael’s seen it with his own eyes. Thankfully Greg is only looking mildly annoyed and frustrated, not murderous. Still Michael doesn’t relax.

“I know,” Greg says.

“Seriously I—“ he stops, “you do?”

“Yes,” Greg says, “I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t,” he sighs, “Alex has a date with Forrest tonight.”

Michael swallows the panic in his throat. Alex has a date. That’s a good thing, or it was before his big brother came and dropped some serious truth bombs on him. Now it’s not. If Alex is going on a date then he’s got feelings. Or the start of feelings. He refuses to fully name the feeling jealousy. It’s definitely mixed with his own worry about everything that Greg has just told him.

“I don’t want to ruin it,” Michael says.

“I don’t want you to ruin it either,” Greg agrees, “I also don’t want you to put my brother through another heartbreak,” he glances at his watch, “it’s 2pm. If you’re going to say something the sooner the better. His date’s picking him up at 8.”

Michael nods.

“Let me look at your car—“ he begins. Greg rolls his eyes, “your car’s fine,” Michael realizes, “got it,” he says, “I’m gonna—“ he motions towards his truck.

He manages to not get any speeding tickets as he gets to Alex’s house. Michael has no doubt that’s where he is. He hopes that Alex isn’t in the shower but that’s a bridge he knows he’s going to have to cross when he gets to it. He rings the doorbell quickly and when the door doesn’t open instantaneously, he finds himself pacing. He’s never been the best when it comes to talking about his feelings, especially where Alex is concerned. And Alex is embracing the fact that he’s some kind of wordsmith genius. Michael has no idea how much he’s about to be dressed down, but again that is a problem that belongs squarely in the later bucket.

“Guerin?”

Michael turns. Alex looks confused to see him standing there. Michael doesn’t know why he suddenly whips his hat off his head, maybe he needs something to hold. Or kill himself with if this blows up in his face. Concern is written all over Alex’s features. Michael gives himself one last moment to cling to the dream that he’ll be a good and whole man when he tells Alex his feelings. That he’ll tell him he fought his way back and beyond. Not just for Alex but because Alex has always made him believe in the good of people. The good of himself. He’s got nothing to back those words up with. It’s a hard fucking dream to let go of.

“I know you have a date,” Michael says. Alex clenches his jaw, “and I, uh, I was trying to get better. Swear to god I was,” he fumbles, “and I was gonna come back when I was,” he adds, “when I had proved I was,” he grips his hat tighter, “but I don’t want you to get your heart broken or have to break someone’s heart—“ he braces himself for Alex to laugh but he doesn’t.

“He’s nice,” Alex says, “I like being around him,” Michael nods, “there could be something there. We could be happy together,” he glares at him, “maybe you’re not the only one who wants to be good for someone, Guerin.”

“I deserved that,” Michael mutters.Alex’s glare turns venomous, “you are good for someone—you’re good for everyone,” Michael argues. 
“I don’t need a pep talk from you,” Alex says.

Fuck, Michael’s forgotten how hot quiet, confident and angry Alex is. Now is not the time to give into how attractive he is. Michael really thought he would be better at this. Even just the whole not focusing on how hot Alex is thing. But he’s failing pretty spectacularly at that as well.

“He’s nice,” Michael says, “and maybe you two are gonna be good together. But you don’t love him.” 
“I don’t know him that well,” Alex argues, “I could.”

“Yeah,” Michael agrees, though the possibility hurts, “you could,” he looks at him, “but it’s not going to be the same.”

Alex looks away. Michael reminds himself that the conversation was going to come back to this. It had to come back to this. Because Michael’s been at the crossroads where Alex is. But Michael’s a coward, he always has been. Especially when it comes to Alex.

“I wanted you to have a chance to be with someone else,” Michael says.

“Why?” Alex questions.

“You deserved it,” Michael says, “I know you don’t need me to tell you that,” he adds quickly.

“You think I deserve it because you dated Maria?” Michael nods. Alex sighs, “I can’t help you make us even for your decisions,” he says, “and I can’t do this,” he adds, “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“I know,” Michael says as Alex turns, “look, I know. You’re not me, I know being even like that isn’t the same thing to you, it’s not to me either,” he tells him, “not when it comes to you.” Alex rests his hand on the doorframe but he’s not slamming the door in Michael’s face, “I thought about you dating him,” Michael continues, “and I thought about you breaking someone’s heart and—“ he swallows, “I don’t want that. I thought if I got better first it would be the right thing to do. But I don’t want to get better first if it’s gonna me you’re hurt in the process.”

Alex stays frozen and Michael is both glad and furious that he can’t see his face. He wants to know what Alex is thinking and he also wants to never see him again so he doesn’t have to feel rejected. He knows Alex could tell him to fuck off and if he does, Michael knows he’s going to have to figure out what to do next. If there is a next. He presses his lips together as Alex just stays there. It’s better than him walking away but it’s not exactly how Michael saw this going.

“Are you trying to say that you’re ready to be with me?” Alex asks finally.

“I’m saying I want us to both make that call,” Michael says, “I want us to meet in the middle.”

Alex whips around as Michael tries not to choke on his own pounding heart. He hadn’t meant to throw the lyrics out there. Alex’s cheeks go pink and Michael feels his own face turn red. Alex holds his gaze for a moment before he seems to come to some kind of decision.

“I’m not cancelling my date,” he says, “it’s in a few hours. That’s not fair to Forrest,” Michael nods around his breaking heart, “I’ll call you afterwards.”

“You don’t have to,” Michael mumbles.

“I’m not going to date him,” Alex says, suddenly a lot closer, “but I’m not going to stand him up or cancel with hours to spare after he asked me out and I said yes.”

Michael feels like he has whiplash.

“You’re not going to date him?” He repeats.

“I’m not going to promise anything,” Alex says, “we’ve talked about doing this before. It’s too soon to say if this is going to be different,” Michael nods, “but I’d like it to be.”

‘Me too.”

Alex holds his gaze and nods.

“Then I’ll call you later,” he says.

To his credit, Michael makes it until 8:30 before he parks himself outside of Alex’s house. He knows Alex doesn’t believe that they have to be even, but he doesn’t agree. Not on everything. Not on this. So he sits there. It’s hours before Alex’s car pulls up and when Michael sees that he’s alone, his heart jumps. Or maybe that’s also because Alex looks really good as he gets out of his car. When he walks up and sees Michael there he stops and shakes his head, though the smile on his lips is what catches Michael’s eyes.

“I was wondering why you weren’t home,” Alex says.

Michael swallows as he stands up. Alex went to his trailer. That’s the thing that turns over in his head as they close the distance.

“I was trying to surprise you,” he admits.

“I thought we could talk,” Alex says. Michael nods, “really talk. We need to talk about a lot.”

“Yeah,” Michael agrees.

“Should we—“ Alex’s lips press together and then part as he nods towards the door.

“Yeah, we should.”

Neither of them move.

“Guerin,” Alex starts.

“Yeah, uh—“

“What?”

Michael knows they’re supposed to be working on their communication and he doesn’t even get to say he’s human as an excuse. Which is good because excuses aren’t really something he’s interested in as he closes the distance between them. Alex inhales sharply as their lips touch, but after a moment he sighs into the kiss, his lips parting as Michael remembers what home feels like. It’s not a long kiss, he doesn’t expect it to lead anywhere, but they still wind up standing with their foreheads pressed together and the world fading away.

“Did I completely misread that?” Michael rasps and Alex shakes his head.

“No,” he says.

“Oh thank god,” Michael breathes. Alex gives him an amused but slightly dazed smile and Michael feels something unravel in his chest, “we should talk,” he finishes.

Alex nods and takes his hand and together they go inside.

#alex manes #michael guerin #malex #malex fic #roswell new mexico #micheal x alex #roswell nm #roswell nm fanfic #greg manes

[snarkwrites]

hi, i’m here to bring you a ✨thot✨ as i clean out my closet and cry over the bikinis that i’ll never get to wear due to covid

i literally don’t care who you pick for this, because i feel the reaction is the same across the board for what i’m about to give you😏 but beach sex or even better, sex in the cabanas👀👀👀👀 like sand gets every where but i am not at all going to complain if someone wants to fuck me on the beach🤷‍♀️ - ❤️

OKAY.. LISTEN I LOVE THIS SO MUCH... HEAR ME OUT HERE.. HAVE YOU CONSIDERED RYAN... BC.. YES. YEET WENT MY IMAGINARY PANTIES.

Ugh, I could kiss you for all these amazing thots you keep blessing me with, angel, you know that? YES. LETS GET TO IT.

WARNINGS:

Sexual content ahead. Not meant for anyone under 18+. If you're a minor, you need to keep scrolling. Do not read what's below the cut.

If you choose to keep reading, a. you can't say you weren't warned already and b, here are things you need to watch for : public sexual situation, unprotected sex, dry humping, mentions of marking, my failed attempts at dirty talk and most importantly, SEX IN A PUBLIC SETTING. IN BROAD DAYLIGHT.

TAGGING:

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@twistnet

OTHER STUFF:

[ faq - multifandom tag list ]

RYAN WOLFE & sex in a poolside cabana;

"You're starting to burn." the crisp depth of the male voice drew you out of a daydream you didn't quite want to end. Your eyes fluttered open and you realized exactly why the sound of his voice was powerful enough to draw you back into the present and out of your own mind. Swallowing hard as your eyes met with Ryan Wolfe, you shrugged off his statement, almost dismissively.

"I'll be tan in the morning. Besides, my lotion is over there. I'm too comfy to get up and go get it."

Ryan shuffled his feet. Rubbing his chin thoughtfully. When he wandered away, you thought he'd probably gone to the poolside bar to get himself a drink -and probably flirt with Natalia some more, the jealous thought crept it's way into your mind before you could stop it.

You put everything out of your head until a few seconds later. Just as you were starting to doze off all over again. He sat down beside the towel you were stretched out on, his legs dangling into the pool. An arm over your body as he stared down at you, a quiet chuckle passing his lips as he shook your head.

"You really can fall asleep anywhere, can't you, princess?"

We're not even going to begin to attempt addressing just how quickly the use of the word princess -or his tone of voice as he said it, affected you. You shivered ever so slightly, raising a hand. Taking off your shades and looking him in the eyes as you yawned and softly laughed while nodding in agreement. "In my defense, I was out late last night with Alexx, Natalia and Calleigh after that last conference."

Ryan nodded. Eyes fixed on your own for a few seconds, lingering. And then breaking your gaze to roam slowly. Almost as if he were savoring the view.

Normally, he barely looked your way -that you knew of, of course, but this time, as his eyes roamed over you and the way you were sprawled out on the black beach towel with the word FUCK spelled out in red calligraphy cursive, it was as if he were really seeing you.

"Your buddy from the Vegas crime lab actually let you roam around dressed like that?" Ryan asked after a few seconds. Raising one of those distracting hands of his to drag it through light brown hair. I miss his shaggier hair, you lamented mentally, I would have literally died to drag my fingers through it or pull it in the heat of the moment.

,, Funny, he almost sounds a little jealous." the next thought came as you raised a brow and tried not to get your hopes up. You sat up and stretched as you gazed at him, curious. It hit you then, he must have seen you joking around with that guy you met at one of the conferences two days before, Greg.

The one who asked you to go out bowling with him and some of his co-workers, but you politely declined.

Because of the oblivious idiot sitting to your left currently.

The cabanas were emptying out. The sun was starting to sink down in the sky just slightly, casting a lazy golden orange hue over everything.

"He doesn't own me." you muttered after a long and heavy pause. You weren't sure why, but you found yourself leaning forward, into Ryan as you turned the upper half of your body to face him. With a teasing and soft giggle, you asked with a smirk, "You're not off flirting with Nat?"

Ryan's brow raised this time. He chuckled, shaking his head no. "I haven't flirted with Natalia in weeks?"

You swallowed hard. Stretched again because you just didn't know what to do with your hands aside from what you wanted to do with them currently.

"Are you gonna stay out here all afternoon?" Ryan asked quietly, hazel eyes darting around the area as he did so. Your eyes darted around also and you yawned, answering softly, "I thought about it, yeah. It's peaceful out here."

"That's because the cabanas are empty. Will you at least get out of the sun?"

"I'd love to but... Kind of wanna show off my new swimsuit." you leaned back, stretching out. Ryan's eyes roamed over you again. Slower this time. Much slower.

Ryan coughed abruptly and then he grumbled. Something to the effect about you, being stubborn. "To who, exactly?" Ryan teased, pointing out yet again that the cabanas were empty at the moment.

This time, he leaned in towards you just slightly. Raising a hand. Tenderly brushing sweaty and damp strands of hair back out of your eyes as the light breeze blew and blew them right into your eyes. His eyes locked on yours for a few long and silent seconds during which your heart was beating like a runaway train, so loudly that you swore he had to have heard it. He leaned in even more. Licking his lips as his eyes settled on your mouth and lingered.

"You." it slipped out in a breathy whisper as you mirrored the way he'd leaned in towards you, leaning in towards him. Close enough that when you said it, your mouth brushed boldly up against his. When he swore quietly, your breath caught in your throat and you had about a split second to ask yourself what exactly you were hoping to accomplish, because he was reaching out. Pulling you into his lap. And then he was standing. Walking straight towards one of the bigger and more private cabanas near the side of the pool further away from any potential prying eyes.

"Ryan?" you questioned, the word stammering as it left your mouth. He stepped into the cabana and sank down to sit on the cozy circular daybed and you wrapped your legs around his waist. Your mouth opened, you were about to ask what was going on, but instead, your words were silenced as he pressed a finger against your lips. The way you were positioned in his lap allowed you to feel the way he strained hard against red and black board shorts. And just when you thought you'd be able to ask him what the hell was going on, you found yourself silenced again, only this time, it was by his mouth. Crashing against yours hungrily as his hands skimmed and ghosted all over your body, finally settling on your ass and squeezing. Hard. Hard enough that you rocked in his lap a little and a quiet growl slipped out of his mouth, swallowed by yours as the kiss deepened. The way he was kissing you, you could feel your lips beginning to bruise and ache. "Ryan?" you finally managed to gasp out his name just as you two pulled away to breathe. His hands roamed upward, settling on your hips. Rocking you back and forth over his bulge and drawing a whimper out of you as a shiver passed through your body.

"You wore that... For me." he muttered, his tone husky as he locked eyes with you and you saw the way lust blacked his eyes out. "Fuck." he practically groaned the word as he bit his lip and let his eyes roam much more boldly now. There was absolutely no doubt that you were being fucked by his gaze.

And just the realization had you dripping. The wetness flooding your thin swimsuit bottoms and making you squirm around in his lap a little. You raised your hands, resting one at either side of his neck as you pulled him in for another kiss greedily. His hands stayed on your hips. Rocking you back and forth in his lap as he bucked himself up and into you.

You wound up on your back, one of his hands pinning both of yours flat against an overstuffed turquoise and white striped pillow that was behind your head. His body settled between your legs, spreading them, and his mouth dove against yours all over again, cutting you off mid moan when you felt his thick bulge brush right against your dripping and aching center, teasing you. He locked eyes with you as the kiss broke. Chuckling quietly as he asked the question, "Were you trying to tease me, princess? Because if you were, it worked. I've been so fucking hard all day..." his mouth burying against your neck as his lips latched onto your skin, leaving a mark behind. You rocked against him, desperate for friction, for anything to make the aching in your cunt stop, but even the little friction he allowed before lowering a hand, gripping your hip and putting your movements at a total standstill... Even that didn't work.

If you thought you were wet before, you were soaked. There had to have been a wet spot on his lap. He had to have felt the way you soaked through your swimsuit.

Almost as if he read your mind, he chuckled, bucked himself into you more urgently, his hands all over you in a frenzied rush, groping any part of your body they settled on. You bit back a loud moan when his hands squeezed your ass, rubbing you against him harder, I mean really baring down.. He muttered calmly against your throat as his mouth ghosted down the front of it, "How are you so wet already, huh? I've barely done anything." while bucking himself against you just enough to make you beg for more breathlessly, pouting as soon as you realized he wasn't letting go of his grip on your hip.

His head dipped down and as his tongue dragged around the shell of your ear, he muttered quietly against it, "Want you so fucking bad. Right here, right now."

"Right here?"

"All I have to do is pull your bottoms to the side. Nobody's gonna know, princess." Ryan informed, gazing down at me with a lust filled look in his eyes. You whimpered, coming alive beneath him as he rose slightly, untying the ties at the waistband of his boardshorts. Licking his lips as his eyes met yours again a few seconds later. One of you needed to have common sense, because normally, that'd be his job, but all of his common sense had pretty much flown out the window by this point. And you've always been ruled by impulse alone, so you weren't about to stop this, either. You whined out urgently and he was pressing into you again, a finger grazing along the skin just below the tie at the side of your bikini. Tracing along where the tie would sit if his finger weren't separating fabric from skin. With one small tug, the tie was loose. His eyes met yours. His tongue ghosted along the outline of his lips and he mumbled quietly, "I'm going to take my time with you later, princess. I promise." against your ear as he moved your bikini bottom out of the way and tugged at the velcro strip holding his board shorts closed, working his cock through the opening. Pressing himself into you, bodies molded together as he sank in slow and deep. Letting you feel every single inch and vein as he did so.

You barely stopped a loud moan. One of his hands rose, settling over your mouth as he leaned in real close and muttered against your ear, "We have to be quiet right now, princess. Later I'll make you scream, okay? I promise."

As you writhed beneath him and met each snap of his hips with your own, you could feel your orgasm really building and you had no doubt in your mind that he meant every word of the promise he'd made about later.

It was all you could do to keep from screaming his name now.

#Anonymous

[cap-winter-barnes]

My Hero - Campbell Eliot x Reader

Requested by @angeltop129​ - I am so sorry for how long this has taken. I hope this is okay. If you would like a Part 2 please let me know.

Warnings: guns, violence (that’s about it I think)

REQUESTS ARE OPEN

West Ham was a town that once upon a time, I would have described as charming and peaceful. But New Ham? New Ham is what I would call chaotic.

I  wish every day that this is just a dream, and that when I wake, everything will be back to the way it was before. But it has been forty-six days since we returned on those school buses. Forty-six days with no idea how or why this has happened to us.

When Cassandra suggested some of us take inventory at the grocery store, I jumped at the chance. Anything to get me off of the streets and away from my home. Being an only child already, I physically cannot stand to be in that house alone.

Kelly and Will have been inseparable since we started the job. Not once have they tried involving me in any of their conversations. I can practically hear every word either way, but it would be nice to at least be involved.

But then again, that’s how my life has always been. I am acknowledged and that’s that. No conversations. No interest. No friends.

Looking at my watch, I realise how long I have gone with nothing to eat. I reach across for my rucksack that is propped against the display of tinned tuna. As my fingers graze the left shoulder strap, I am startled by a loud smash from the entrance of the store. Leaving the bag where it is, I stand and peer out of the aisle. I’m honestly not surprised to see some of the local idiots causing trouble. I find it funny how I can’t place a name to their faces except for one. Campbell.

He for once is not directly involved with the disruption, but is standing outside of the store, watching on. But why does he look nervous? Something doesn’t seem right though. And that’s when I notice the group inside the store are all armed.

Being someone who is against conflict of any sort, I quickly back away from the aisle end. But as I reach for my bag, I trip over my own feet and come crashing down into the shelving.

Tins upon tins of food come crashing down with me to the tiled floor. The noise is deafening as they all come tumbling down. It seems endless. A few of the larger products don’t miss me on their descent to the ground. My head throbs with blinding pain. I raise my hands above my head to soften the blow of those that continue to fall, the pain is horrendous. The metal digs into my palms, bending my fingers unnaturally backwards. It’s no wonder that I don’t hear the sounds of the group approaching me, guns aimed in my direction.

My vision is blurred, and my ears are ringing as I try and focus. Through the incessant sound of the ringing, I can tell that there are people shouting. But I can’t quite make out who. I place my hands on the floor to steady myself, and I try and push up from the ground.

“Hey, hey, hey.” A voice cuts clearly through the ringing in my ears. “No. You need to stay where you are.” I recognise the voice, but my brain is still fuzzy from the impact of the tinned goods. “Y/N. Hey.” Campbell. That’s Campbell’s voice.

With help, I lower myself back down to the floor, my back propped up against what is left of the shelving. My vision is slowly coming back to me and I can make out the group of guys standing around where I had last seen them. But this time they look concerned.

I turn to look at Campbell as he carefully kicks the tins out of the way, the sound hurts my head. He then kneels down in front of me, resting his forearms on his knees as he looks at me.

“How are you feeling?” I frown at him and reach up to my head with my fingers. He quickly takes my hand and brings it back down to my body. “You’re bleeding,” he grimaces as he says it, “you don’t need to see it.” I minutely nod my head in understanding. So that’s why I feel like my skull has been cracked open. He takes of his plaid overshirt and gently wraps it around my head as a makeshift bandage.

“I’ll sort you a proper one soon, okay?” He reassures me as he makes sure that the shirt is secure.

I smile in thanks and close my eyes, trying to block out the bright fluorescent lights of the store. “Hey, no. You have to keep your eyes open.”

“The lights are too fucking bright.” My voice is laced with fatigue and annoyance. He chuckles and reaches into the back pocket of his jeans, revealing a pair of dark plastic sunglasses. He opens them up and places them on my face, pushing a strand of loose hair behind my ear as he does so.

“Better?” I smile and nod at him, the relief from the brightness takes some of the aching in my head away. Campbell returns the smile and then takes a seat next to me, his shoulder knocking against mine as he does so.

“Hey, Eliot! We done here?” A voice cuts through the silence, it feels like a blade is pressing against my head as he says it. I wince at the sensation and Campbell notices. His expression is no longer caring and kind, but now filled with annoyance. Standing, he makes his way towards the group that have made their way to us.  

“No, we’re not done here.” As Campbell walks towards them, I watch on with worry. I remember them all carrying guns. And not all of them were handguns. My heart rate increases at the thought of someone firing. Campbell can handle himself; I’ve seen him in fights in and out of school. And I’ve never seen him lose.

But as he walks away from me, I notice that tucked into the waistband of his jeans, is a handgun. My heart is hammering in my chest and I feel like I’m going to be sick.

“We’re not done here until I say so.” Campbell places his hands into his front pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels. “Well, until Cassandra, says so.” The guy laughs as if it’s the funniest joke he’s heard. The others in the group have smirks resting on their faces. “Something funny to you, Dewey?”

“You hate Cassandra. So why get her involved?”

Campbell clears his throat and looks back towards me, a small smile on his lips.

“Because of what you did.” He reaches with his right hand to his waistband and wraps his fingers around the gun but doesn’t remove it from its hiding spot. “What would you have done if you’d have shot her, huh?”

“She shouldn’t be here in the first place, Eliot.” He turns to look at his friends for their support, but none give it. “Should have kept out of our business.”

“Your business?” Campbell’s tone was darker now, his voice raising in volume. “You came here, with guns, to take stuff that doesn’t belong to you.”

“Like you’ve never stolen anything in your life.”

Campbell nods his head, smirking as he does so, looking at the floor. He swipes his tongue across his bottom lip and then bites down on it. I can see his body language change instantly, from relaxed to tense. As if he’s holding back.

It’s then that he takes the gun from his belt and aims it at him. His friends immediately take a step back, a few of them dropping their weapons on the ground. They raise their hands above their heads in surrender and back up.

“Greg, man. It’s not worth it.” They all then chime in, trying to calm Dewey down, to convince him to admit to his wrong doings. But to no avail.

“You got a soft spot for her, do ya Campbell?”

“That’s none of your fucking business.” His grip tightens on the gun.

“Greg, c’mon.”

He throws a look over his shoulder to the group that are slowly retreating. Each one of them with a look of regret on their faces. A few take a seat on the ground, knowing if they try and leave, they will be in the same situation as Greg is now.

I can’t see the expression on his face, but I know for a fact, that it would be one of disapproval at their words.

“Campbell.” His name leaves my lips before I can even process it in my head. My eyes widen in surprise and I cover my mouth with my hand.

He turns to face me without any hesitation and his grip on the gun falters for a moment, his wrist lowering slightly.

That’s when Greg takes the opportunity to grab him. Everything is happening so fast I have no idea what’s going. One moment Greg is grabbing at Campbell’s arms and throwing punches and the next, there is a gunshot echoing through the store. Then there is silence. I look across to the two boys, to find Greg with a shocked expression on his face. His skin pale and eyes brimming with unfallen tears. There’s a bruise starting to bloom on his cheek already and his top lip is split.

Campbell is standing a metre or so away from him, a hand to his left temple, breathing heavy. The gun clutched in his right hand tightly. Neither of them is injured, aside from the bruises and split lip.  

“Dude, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise to me, apologise to her.”

Campbell directs Greg’s attention to me.

“I am so sorry. For everything. It was stupid of us – of me, to come here. It was my idea. I’m sorry.”

“Apology accepted.” Campbell scoffs lightly under his breath, I seem to be the only one that notices.

“Go. But don’t think for one second you’ve got away with this. That was a warning shot, alright? Next time I won’t miss.” Campbell straightens himself up and tucks the gun back into the waistband of his jeans, this time in the front so that everybody can see it. “And Cassandra will want to speak to you all.” He raises his voice so that they can hear him as they swiftly make their way out of the store. The ground now littered with their discarded weapons.

At least they won’t be using them again any time soon.

I tilt my head back and rest it onto the shelf behind me, my heart rate still high and my breathing shallow. I’m oblivious to Campbell taking a seat next to me until he’s knocking his elbow against mine to get my attention.

“Hey, you alright?’

I nod, worried that my words will fail me if I open my mouth. Slipping his sunglasses off of my face, I turn to look at him. His face is a mess, his left temple and cheek are already turning green and purple from the punches Greg delivered. No doubt he’ll have a black eye by the end of the day. And his lip is split, the blood drying already.

“I’m sorry.” He frowns at me, questioning me without words. “About you-, about your face.”

“It’s okay. No need to apologise.” He whispers and he shakes his head.

I reach up and slowly unravel the shirt from around my head. Feeling ridiculous sat here like this. I hold it in my lap, not wanting to give it back without washing it first. Seems a bit unfair when it’s my blood after all.

We sit in silence for a few minutes until we both simultaneously start laughing. After everything that’s happened, this is probably something that neither of us were expecting to occur.

“Why don’t we get out of here?” His words are kind, so unlike what I expected of him.

“Yeah.” Accepting his offer, he stands, holding out his hand for me to take. I slip my hand into his, squeezing, as he pulls me to my fit. My head spins for a moment before it stops, Campbell holding me tightly while I compose myself.

“I’ve gotta ask.” He clears his throat then continues. “You’ve not been staying at your place for a few days now. Where have you been going?”

“You been watching me, Eliot?”

His cheeks blush with embarrassment.

“Just making sure you’re alright is all.”

I nod my head and look at my feet, grinding my toes into the cracks in the tiles.

“I can’t be there on my own. It’s just.” I take a deep breath; it sounds so stupid to say it out loud. “Being an only child, just, it’s so empty. My Mom worked from home, so I was never on my own. This i-, this is the first time.”

When he squeezes my hand reassuringly, I realise that he hadn’t let go of me this whole time.

“Come stay with me.”

“What?”

“Come stay with me, at my place. I won’t ask anything of you. I’ll even cook you dinner.”

“Is that your way of asking me out?”

“Maybe.” He chuckles and leads me out of the store, making sure I don’t trip over anything else.

His hand is in mine the entire way.

#Campbell Eliot x reader #campbell x reader #Campbell Eliot imagines #the society imagines

[chyrstis]

The Broadcast

I’ve been sitting on this one for a while, holding onto a couple of conversations that I loved here while also wanting to set some things up for the next fic in the series, which is looking to be a long one, but as I joked on AO3, I have to be honest here. I really wanted to tackle more flirting conversations between certain individuals here, while also giving John some time to do what he does best.

Also, any excerpts from the lovely BoJ I do not take ownership of at all! Just a quick disclaimer, because it is referenced here.

Pairing: F!Dep x Sharky Boshaw (I’d claim pre-ship, but this is getting a little ridiculous) Rating: T Word Count: 5.6K whoops

Link to AO3!

___

A moment of peace never lasts as long as it should.

______________

The news was improving. Honest to God improving as it came in, and Hana almost didn’t know what to do with it.

With the chatter a mix of updates on the outposts taken, shots taken at John – which she took point on, just in case the asshole was tuning in somehow – and more voices joining in on the line by the day, things were looking up. It actually seemed like they were pushing the Peggies back in a way that counted, and she didn’t want to let up for a second.

John hadn’t retaliated yet. Not like before when he’d first sent people to run her down, and had taken more than a little pride in letting her know just what was going to happen next, but he’d taken measures in other areas to compensate for it.

The patrols hadn’t stopped. The road blocks were still operating further south and west of here, in spite of her and Sharky’s best efforts to firebomb every last one, and the line of Peggies that kept on stepping right into Grace’s line of sight only seemed to be getting longer, and longer.

It was starting to feel like they would never leave the valley. After weeks of watching silos disappear, and outposts fall, it felt strange to even consider being anywhere else, but they couldn’t stay here. Not with news coming in every day from the north, and the need to head back to the jail picking at her more and more by the day.

Sure, she wasn’t the only one fighting. God, she’d watched these people tear the cult a new one with a determination she envied, but she’d never wished harder that she could be in more than one place at once.

Just for the chance to see what Jess was facing up north, with Eli coming in over the radios. To hear Whitehorse’s calm rundown, how to size up a situation so you know for sure it’s a bad one, Rook, before she ran in a little too half-cocked anyway. Hell, to hear Hurk’s stories again, and to see the giant grin he’d put on Sharky’s face whenever the two were left to their own devices.

She wanted to do better. Be better for them, but some days it still felt like she was grasping at straws. Doing all right, but never enough, and she’d keep on trying every damn day as long as she was able to. Pushing, fighting, and hoping that what she was doing was helping, and not fucking things up further.

It was the very least she could do, and that kept her moving forward.

“Golden Valley? GVG? You there, over?”

Static came through, bits and pieces as Hana waited for the message to go through, and tapped her fingers along the steering wheel as they all waited. She heard Grace shift from the backseat, and noticed her leaning forward in the rearview mirror to better see the road ahead.

“Yo, GVG? Everything okay? Taking a while to get back to us there.” She frowned when a few scattered words filtered through, and thumped the radio with the side of her hand. “This is the Deputy. Just giving a quick heads up to say you’ll be getting a few visitors shortly, and I’d hate to stop by anywhere I’m not wanted.”

Located on the edge of Fall’s End, the gas station had become the place to spot any strange trucks trying to roll in, while also giving them one of a handful of safe places to fuel up. But that usefulness went both ways, and the Resistance and the cult had practically traded this spot back and forth until they had finally been able to give them the boot.

“-ep? Drop on by-“

But the broken message wasn’t reassuring her in the slightest right now. Not as long as they kept the beaten-up Peggie van as their ride of choice, and not until they’d pulled up and had a chance to speak to them all face-to-face.

Speeding down the road, the turn to the gas station nearly blindsided her. She’d known it was a sharp one, and Sharky and Grace had both tried reminding her in the hopes that she’d catch it, but it nearly flew right on by her without thinking. The tires screeched as she hit the brakes and turned, making Sharky’s arm fly up to grab the handle hanging above his head, and thought for a moment she’d flip the thing. The minute the van rocked back into place on its wheels, however, she flashed Grace a look of apology in the rearview mirror, and maneuvered them into a spot by the pumps.

Letting out one last screech of defiance, the van came to a stop, and her head nearly bounced off of the seat. “Sound off, everyone all right?”

Sharky let out a breath and flashed her a thumbs up. “Still got it, Dep.”

“Grace?”

“…Yeah, I hear you.”

In the distance, she saw hints of movement. Just enough to remind her that as deserted as the place seemed, thinking that was a mistake, and rolled down her window to let out a whistle.

Giving it a minute, she watched as Grace steadied her rifle from the back, and felt for the revolver she’d recently picked up. Snapping off shots with it still made her feel like she was fighting with the thing, but it worked in a pinch, and she’d make it work here if she had to.

Sharky started shifting in his seat. Kept his shotgun up even as Hana angled her head towards him with her finger pressed to her lips, but when he waggled his eyebrows at her, she couldn’t help the smile that slipped out.

“Quit it,” she murmured, turning her attention back to the store.

“Huh? Quit what?” He hadn’t even bothered whispering, and she could just imagine the kind of grin that came with that tone of voice.

Just being your lovely, ridiculous self. “This’s still clear, right Grace?”

“Far as I know,” she replied from the back. “Mary May hasn’t mentioned any changes, but they’re taking their time getting back to us. Better be ready just in case that means what we’re thinking it does.”

Shifting her eyes between the roof of the gas station and the front, there was a flicker of light up top. One that could’ve been a signal, or with Hana’s luck, the last thing she’d see before a sniper’s lucky shot. But soon enough another whistle rang out, imitating hers. It might’ve even been done with relish as they stretched the sound out, ending with a flourish.

She reached for the radio and tried again. “Hey, GVG. You got some friendlies outside. We got some friendlies inside?”

This time the voice on the other end picked up instantly. “Roger, and I’m on my way out to you!”

“…Grace?”

Looking towards the mirror again, she caught her nod. “On it.”

Sharky, however, was already opening the door to get out with her, not even giving her a chance to stop him if she wanted to, and Hana unbuckled her seatbelt fast to make sure she’d beat him.

That’s when the door to the front swung open. A woman jogged out towards her, smiling wide as she did so, and it wasn’t until she came to a stop in front of her that she realized they’d met before. She wasn’t entirely sure where or specifically when, but she’d always been decent at remembering faces, and a great smile stuck with her no matter what.

“Deputy! Let me tell you, you’ve got to pick a better way to get around. Some of us are twitchy to begin with, but you stop by with Peggie colors, and not all of us are going to be careful about it.” She held out her hand, and Hana gave it a solid shake. “Dunno if you remember me any, but uh, name’s Gloria.”

“Wait a sec,” Hana said, snapping her fingers, “from the Woodson’s?”

Her eyes lit up instantly. “Holy shit, you do! I make that kind of an impression?”

“Hey, anyone that manages to take control after someone yells at them to grab the wheel and jumps out’s pretty damn cool in my book. And you? You totally took that in stride.”

That made her grin all the more, and this time Hana couldn’t help but join her. “For a long time we thought you were…hell, either dead or on a one-way ticket straight to the bunker. But even after hearing you on the radio, it’s good to have a chance to see that ourselves.”

Gloria waved towards the roof, and the red flashing light - which had been a sniper’s sight after all - danced briefly across Hana’s chest before disappearing. It never failed to make her heart skip a beat, and she turned to give Grace a quick signal to stand down as well.

“Sorry about that. Greg’s up top, and with Roy inside, there’s only three of us holding this down at the moment. It’s not much, but you make do, and lucky for us we’ve been fine so far. Short of the radio bugging out every now and then, but it’s a work in progress. So…”

Adjusting her ballcap, Gloria glanced between her and Sharky, and gave them both an expectant look.

“What can we do for you?”

As it turned out, quite a bit.

The gas station itself was mostly operational, with a small amount left in reserve. They had some canisters stashed nearby, which was fine in the short term, but the town needed fuel bad, a fact that Mary May had touched on over the radio the last time Hana had called in.

John had drained the valley dry, but there were still tankers on the road. One by one, they drove in from the east, flanked by heavy enough escorts to tell anyone that taking one was going to be ugly at best, but the Henbane kept sending them. Faith kept sending them, and there was no telling how much longer that other fuel source was going to last.

So, they needed a plan. Taking any of them was a start, but if they wanted more than a scattered handful, they needed something solid. Something to start working towards, and much as she leaned on it heavily, sheer dumb luck wasn’t anywhere near that.

“Now, I know you ain’t talking about taking any of that shit without me, right?”

“Let’s see if I’ve got it right here,” she said, handing the gas can to Sharky. “I’m talking running down a rig filled to the brim with fuel, dodging trees left and right with the wind whipping around me, bullets flying everywhere, heart beating a mile a minute, when all it would take is a single shot to either end myself or set that entire thing off.”

Hana blew out a breath, and grinned wide when she caught him doing the same.

“Sounds pretty great, huh? And any of that’s leaning more than a little towards F and F, and what kind of a friend would I be to deny you a chance to get a piece of that?”

“F and F?”

Grace had been scanning their map, holding it down over the hood of the van as a breeze kicked up, and Hana hadn’t even known she was listening in. Her eyes were glued right to their marked routes, tracing them up and around the valley, and remained there even when Hana turned to look at her.

“You know, the Fast and Furious movies.  We’d practically be borrowing a page out of their script taking down one of the cult’s trucks like that. Or would that be more Mad Max?”

“Dep, just so you’d know, getting in on any of that would bring a tear to my eye.” And judging from the small swipe Sharky gave them, he was most of the way there. “But Mad Max straight-up, and we’d need to go and grab Hurkie before doing any of that. I promised him if we ever got to that point in the middle of this, I’d be the first to roll up, flamethrower in hand, and we’d just go to town. Light all of the Peggies’ shit up bright enough to fucking blind people, which we’re still doing now, just without the assless chaps ‘cause it’s still kinda early for it. Leather also needs baby powder and shit so you ain’t suffering when it rides up your ass, and John’s probably hoarding it all.”

Grace’s pained look almost made her lose it on the spot. “I did not need that visual.”

“John, or the assless chaps?” Hana asked, biting her lip to keep from laughing. “Though I’m having a real hard time imagining you in the full getup there, Shark. Baby powder or not.”

“What? I’m serious. Helps with the chafing and the sweating, and I know my balls would be swimming laps after a day of that. I’d just need to give ‘em a little light dusting beforehand, and everything would be right as rain. But going back to Hurk, if he heard he’d missed out on any of that? Well it’d just break his heart.”

“Just as long as you remember that we need to hold onto all of this.” She leaned back against the van, watching him as he unscrewed the cap and set the can down by his feet. “Fuel’s at too much at a premium right now to mess around with it. So try to save the fireballs for things that we’d all love to see go up, like John’s silos and signs. Or hell, that plane of his.”

“Done and done, my compadre, but just saying if it did?” He took out a cigarette and started lighting it, “Man, that would be one big, beautiful thing to see.”

Rolling her eyes, Hana plucked the cigarette out of Sharky’s hand only for him to whip his head towards her.

“Geez, Dep, are you serious? I’m down to one!”

“I’m thinking of your safety, bud,” she said, pointing at the setup in front of him. “Cigs and gas don’t mix. I don’t even need to mention the number of movies that have a little too much fun with that.”

“Uh, yeah, but that shit only goes down if you’re rough with it. Like making big ol’ sparks, holding the lighter to the pump, or dousing yourself in it, but knocking or hitting any of this while puffing away?“ He rapped at the side of the van with the side of his fist, and leaned against it. “About as safe as you can get.”

Pinching the cigarette between her fingers, she traded a skeptical look with Grace before giving him a long glance. “You know I’m still keeping this, right? After the last three I let you bum off of me, it’s only fair.”

That got a pout. “Aw, come on.”

“I’ll make sure to steal you a pack. Promise.”

His grumbling told her he didn’t agree one bit, but she still batted her eyes at him before turning on her heel to head inside. And as she started in on Sharky’s cigarette, might’ve made a mental pledge to go for at least three packs, minimum.

Rapping lightly on the door, Hana pulled it open only to be greeted by Roy. The older man dressed from head to toe in full hunter gear gave her a quick salute before resuming his perch by the boarded-up window. He seemed set on watching the front - a smart move considering their people were still out there and fueling up - and Hana hooked a thumb through the beltloops of her jeans before taking a look around.

She’d been here a few times before. Actually had a chance to fill up the old junker she’d bought from someone working at US Auto here, and remembered being annoyed she couldn’t find a single motorcycle. How she’d groused over it to the point she’d missed the cut off for the fifteen dollars she’d meant to gas up to, and swore loud enough that the other person at the pumps avoided making eye contact with her.

God, she wondered if that car was even there still. Her newly acquired, but mildly crunched white sedan, abandoned back at the station with her half-drunk coffee still sitting in the cup holder. Ditched in favor of rushing in through the front, half-awake up until she’d joined the others and Burke, and everything had just-

Hana sighed. Rubbed at her eyes, as she stood there and finished off the rest of the cigarette.

Probably not, but it was a thought, and as she stepped further into the station as a whole, she shifted her focus to checking out the rest of it.

Broken glass crunched under her boots as she moved down the aisles. Most were empty, the supplies either hastily cleared by John’s men, taken by people crossing through, or by the group currently stationed here. Walking by the empty freezers, she took one look at the baseball resting on a nearby shelf, and gave it a small push. It wobbled as it rolled, passing by the abandoned cans of tuna fish and spam as it went, and she held out a gloved hand to catch it when it reached the end and fell over the edge.

It plopped down right into her palm right as she noticed the book on the second shelf. Shoved towards the back and hidden behind an empty box, it had been overlooked completely, but she’d know the white leather cover of it anywhere.

The Book of Joseph, or rather one of many.

Just because she’d burned the one at the top of Joseph’s statue didn’t mean there weren’t others of these littered all over the county, and she tucked the baseball under her arm as she picked it up.

It wasn’t heavily damaged, and flipping through it she couldn’t find any torn or removed pages. Just Joseph’s words flying past as she sped right to the end, reaching the last couple of pages.

The light is now shining on you, in you; it radiates out from you. You are strong, much stronger than they are. You are just and pure. You are the chosen ones. I beseech you to join me, to join the family - to join your family.

Jesus. She’d never taken the time to read any of it before, but the message here bombarded her and right.

You do not belong in this world. You belong in the next world, the new world.

The old one will disappear. Along with everyone who ever doubted both you and I. I know not the details of the divine plan to annihilate this abhorrent, pestilent society. I cannot tell you-

She paused, and read over that sentence again.

I know not.

But she’d felt the fire with him. Stood right alongside him as the heat set in. Burned with him.

Her fingers traced the words. Ran over each one as they started to shake.

-there may be times of suffering. But the light that lives in us will protect us against doubt. For doubt is a serpent whose venom seeps into-

Throwing the book back onto the shelf, she drew in a breath. Held it, then let it out slowly through her nose as she stared it down. Willed it to catch fire, tear itself up, do anything other than what it had already accomplished.

But it stayed in place, gathering dust.

“Doubt’s a serpent, huh?” Hana muttered darkly, nearly spitting at the floor. “Sounds about right.”

The door to the front swung open, and she started. The flash of green quickly told her exactly who it was, however, and she put as much distance between herself and the book as possible, tossing the baseball back and forth between her hands. Poured as much of that anxious energy into it as possible, just so it wouldn’t keep on making her hair stand on end.

“Hey,” she said, catching Sharky’s eye once he wandered into the aisle with her. “Everything okay outside?”

“Yeah, gas’s in, Grace’s out front going over how to keep this place as Peggie-proof as possible, and all you gotta do is say the word and we’re gone. But I figured I’d head inside first. Wanted to check this place out, ‘cause it’s been way too long since I’ve been here.”

“Fond memories?”

“Hell yeah,” he said, flicking both eyebrows up. “I used to score some porn mags here.”

Hana nearly dropped the baseball. “Wait, what?”

“Yeah, they’d be on that back wall, some of ‘em wrapped, the other half hidden behind the fishing and trapping ones.” He stepped past her, heading right up to the empty shelves as he glanced back towards her. “Just waited until they were busy up front to slip one or two out, just right up and under like so-” he pulled up his hoodie, and proceeded to pretend to hide his hand under it, tucking it along his midsection, “along with a pack of smokes.”

“Seriously? Porn mags?”

“Yeah, best part is that if you headed out to the toilet over yonder, you’d find a couple waiting there too. Now they never made that shit public knowledge, but if you’d check off to the side right by the trash can, you’d find last month’s lady looking right up at you. And yeah, some of the pages stuck together and others were torn out, but that shit was on the house. No guy in need’s ever gonna turn his nose up at that.”

A thoughtful look settled over him for a moment, along with a lazy grin before he perked up.

“Shit, you think it’s still there? Like I’m cool with the nostalgia boner I’ve got going on right now ‘cause it’s pretty solid, but if I found one in semi-mint condition? That’d get me fifty off of Hurk, easy.”

Hana wrinkled her nose at it herself, and started trying to juggle the baseball again. “You er, you do you, bud. Think I’d take a hard pass on that one.”

“Yo, it’s not like it’s woods porn, or nothing. Not that there’s anything wrong with it, it’s just a little far to go to find anything worth look looking at, and I know all of that shit’s either been moved or taken, and this’s right next door, and-.”

“Look, I don’t even know what woods porn is,” she said, cutting in before he could dive right into telling her, “but tell you what. It’s not quite fifty, but I bet you twenty I could catch another one of these if you tossed it to me.”

Bouncing the baseball between her hands, Sharky’s eyes were locked on her as she threw it above her head, and moved her hand behind her back just in time to catch it. “While juggling that one?”

“While juggling this one.”

His smile grew, and it took him no time at all to find something else to pitch at her. Sliding back into the mini-rhythm she’d found, he tossed her the second ball and brought it into the same pattern, doing pretty well for someone that took it up just to make an old classmate eat their words.

Sharky’s delight made it all worth it, though, earning her one hell of a smile when she started juggling in earnest. “Shit, you’re a regular wizard with your hands, Dep. Thought you’d toss it right back at me.”

Given that the compliment was on her juggling random shit without smacking herself, she had no reason to do so, but she might’ve blushed. Just a little.

“Yeah, I know I’m awesome,” she said, giving him a wink. “Just full of hidden unknown talents, but I’d still watch your head if I were you. …Might still end up throwing it your way if I slip up.”

“Well, you won’t have to worry much about me. I’ve got a set myself.”

“Of magic hands?” She waggled her eyebrows at him. “Just how magical are we talking here?”

“I could get a few testimonials. I might be well known for things other than the ol’ Boshaw Special.“

Boshaw Spec-? Oh. That.

Her attention locked right onto his mouth before darting back to his hands, and she kicked herself for it. “Is that right?”

“Trick of the wrist, and, uh…” He made a motion with a few of his fingers, and she didn’t need to think hard to get the visual. “Well, you do that, you’ll get more than a few calls back.”

“Uh huh,” Hana replied, biting at the corner of her lip. Then nearly missed her catch when she failed to shake the mental image he’d conjured up. “So, definitely good with them then. But are you quick?”

“Quick?”

“Think fast!”

He yelped when the ball flew right past his head, his own face going red, and she might’ve felt a little bad for surprising him like that. But it was his fault for starting this conversation to begin with, and also for giving her way too much to think about when it came to-

“..puty? Hey, kid, you there?”

Grabbing for her radio, Sharky shot her a curious look as she pulled it up to her ear. If Dutch was calling, something was up, and she braced herself accordingly. “Hey, Dutch. Dep here. What’s going on?”

“Thought you might want to know before you get blindsided by it, but there’s a new broadcast out. One where John’s got something to say about your work so far. And here I’d say, ‘good’, because that still stands. But if he’s going to the airwaves to say something about it, he’s got to be feeling the pressure. You might still want to hear what he has to say.”

“Oh, fuck,” she muttered, scanning the old store for a television. If John was pissed off enough to put on a show and not call her, this could be a problem. “Shark, we need a TV, stat.”

He went for the other end of the store. “On it!”

“Thanks for the heads up,” she said, through the radio, “and don’t worry. Heads are on swivels, over.”

“Keep it spinning, kid.”

It didn’t take long, but after checking with Roy, the two closed in on the television stashed in the employee’s room in the back. It was still working, somehow, and after plugging it back in, Sharky started messing with the antenna.

“Eh, back this way. No, wait, back the other?”

She reached over to pull at one, and Sharky aimed it towards her.  “Maybe if I jiggle it a bit.”

“No, what’s jiggling going to do to-“

“-will you be willing to pay it?”

John’s voice rang through the room, and she quickly stepped away to get a better look at the screen. The broadcast looped back, and once again he started to speak.

“My brothers and sisters, today’s message is not for you. Your dedication remains strong to our cause, and to the Father.”

“Motherfucker,” Hana breathed, taking in the stage John set for himself.

He wasn’t outside this time around. Not surrounded by his loving flock, with Joey not even ten feet away from him. This time he was alone. Sitting behind a large desk, he kept his hands folded in front of him. Everything neat and in place, as a solemn look entered his eyes.

This was restrained; stripped down, lacking the flashiness of the previous broadcast, and that had her worrying at her lip as he continued to speak. 

“And for that dedication you will continue to be enriched and rewarded. Knowing full well that what you’ve done up until this point in time has raised us up in turn. Made us greater for all that you’ve sacrificed.”

Sharky rolled his eyes, pretending to jerk off as John leveled another profound glance towards his audience, and she gave him a small punch to the arm before turning back to the broadcast.

“No, this is for the Deputy’s ears, and for any that continue to follow her, I ask you to heed my words, and my message.”

By this point John had leaned forward, his blue eyes set on the screen. Focused on a single point, miles away, and with the flick of a switch, she’d helped him find his target.

“Because the path that you walk is one rife with conflict, and while you claim this is some form of justice, it will ultimately do more harm than good. For this petty need for destruction consumes all, taking everything with it, and with so much at stake, I ask of you, why? Why would you let it? Why would take away these tools, the lives of these precious souls right when they had finally found what they had longed for most?”

He dropped his eyes. Kept them focused on his clasped hands for a beat, then looked right back at her.

“Perhaps I was at fault for failing to notice it sooner. For failing to understand the depths of your anger, your rage, but I promise this will change. When my people find you, when they guide you to me, I will not falter. I will give you everything you need, every moment that you could ever ask for, just to find what festers in you so.”

Her fingers curled into a fist, her nails biting right into her gloves.

“Perhaps then it will be easier to accept. To see it for what it truly is, and you will not be alone in this, Deputy. Not for a second. But until then, understand what we have to do in turn-”

“Come on, H, you don’t wanna keep on listening to this, do you?”  Sharky set a hand on her shoulder, snapping her right out of it. “Just more of his shit, over and over?”

After a few seconds – and more of John’s words, since he wasn’t done at all – she took in a deep breath and let it out. Leaned into Sharky’s touch as he shifted his hand so he could rub at her upper back instead, and tried like hell not to sigh at any of it.

“Don’t you know I’m in need of help, Shark?” she asked, glancing up at him. “Desperate for it?”

“Well, I’m desperate for a round or five with Casey’s all you can eat Ribs n’ Nibs, and probably a few other things John’d be fine with carving into me. Seeing as I am not about any of that, that’s a big fat no, but…” He inclined his head as he looked her over, and wet his lips. “I think you’re fine, Dep.”

There was nothing subtle about that, not at all, and she might’ve lost her footing for a bit. Let his statement really sink in as a blush came with it, and grinned.  

“Fine?”

“More than fine,” Sharky blurted out, “just-um, you know what you wanna do. You go out and you do it. Just ‘cause John don’t agree with it, or it doesn’t help him pull any of the shit he and the others want – and seriously, fuck that – don’t make it wrong, or you. You’re just kicking ass and taking names. Doing a full day’s worth of that all before most can get in a shit, shower, and shave, and maybe some kind of breakfast, and that’s pretty fucking cool. Just doing that, like you do.”

That got a laugh out of her, and she couldn’t help the fond look that followed. “Like I do, apparently.”

He was smiling back at her now. Leaning more in her space than he was a few seconds ago, all while his hand stayed warm at her back. The height difference between them had never been extreme, just a half-foot at most, but from here she could easily gauge it. Note just how much she’d need to tilt her head back as she stood up on her toes to match him, and liked it.

“And if John’s got a problem with that, fuck him too. Though not, you know-“

“Literally?”

Sharky shuddered.  “Yeah, no. Don’t do any of that. Earlier I was just saying shit out loud as I was thinking it, and uh…”

He let the words trail off, looking right at her as Hana leaned forward a hair. Not enough to touch him, but enough for him to notice. To look at her with the kind of awe he’d always try and stammer his way out of before, but hadn’t found a way to do so yet. 

“And I uh…” He swallowed hard. “I don’t think doing any of that’s desperate.”

“You being desperate, or me?”

Sharky blew out a breath. “Shit, both?”

She was closer now, and didn’t wait to see what he’d do before giving up another inch. Just darted in, and planted a kiss right on his cheek. Felt the slightest scratch of his stubble against her lips after he’d failed to shave for two days and counting, and didn’t draw back as far as she should’ve.

Just lingered by him as he shut his mouth, and stayed put. Didn’t move, or sweep in to kiss her like he easily could’ve at this distance.

And the disappointment that followed shouldn’t have stung at all, but it did.

“Think it might just be me, though,” Hana murmured, and let her eyes drift back to the television.

To John as he looped back through his message, over, and over, hoping this would be the time it’d take.

“-will be judged, and your actions large and small laid bare before you. At that point, given the cost and those that fell to make it possible, will you be willing to pay it? Think on this. Because when we meet again-“

Jabbing at the power switch, she shut it off, and didn't linger this time around. Just gave Sharky a wan smile before heading back out front.

#far cry 5 #sharky boshaw #grace armstrong #john seed #deputy hana #female deputy/sharky boshaw #fanfiction #FC5 fanfiction #fic series: you'll be okay I promise #now to start tackling that outline! #and I'll agonize over the errors I might've missed in this one tomorrow #I've poked at it enough

[authorwiththedragontattoo]

The Snitch Seeker - Chapter 2

Chapter 1  

When he had first heard about Hogwarts eighth year, the thought of attending didn’t even cross Draco’s mind. He had run away from the dark lord, barely evaded Azkaban and spent the last four months living in a house that was being monitored 24/7 by the ministry. They knew every move they made, if Draco decided to put an extra sugar in his coffee one morning, the Ministry knew about it.

So, when Narcissa Malfoy came into his room one day holding a letter from Minerva McGonagall requesting his return to Hogwarts in September, he was shocked to say the least. —– or yet another hogwarts eighth year in which draco redeems himself fic

Rating: Teen and up audiences

Warnings: Mild references to violence and death, mild gore, references to alcoholism and bad eating habits

“I’m going back to Hogwarts, Father.” 

Draco stepped tentatively into Lucius Malfoy’s office. Lucius spent most of his time in there nowadays, drowning in old papers, frantically highlighting and scribbling down any notes he could. Neither Draco nor Narcissa knew exactly what he hoped to find in the old paperwork, but they expected he was looking for something, some way to climb his way back to the top. He had hoped that giving up the identities of escaped Death Eaters would be enough to earn him the title he had before, but it hadn’t. He was still just a failed ex- Death Eater who was considered a coward on both sides.

Draco’s words caused him to pause his frantic rummaging through his old draws, and look up at his son. His hair had grown long and unkempt, and his face was stubbly and old beyond his years. 

“Hogwarts?” 

Draco swallowed, “Yes, Father. To complete my N.E.W.Ts, I was invited by Professor McGonagall.”

Lucius’ brow furrowed, and he turned to face Draco properly; “And I expect all those mudbloods and blood traitors have been invited back as well.” 

Draco cringed at the language his father used. Words he had thrown around so freely before now left a sour taste in his mouth, “I expect so, yes.” 

This seemed to catch Lucius’ interest, as his face drew to that of concentration. Draco felt unnerved by him, Lucius had been rather… unhinged for a while now. While Draco and his mother had accepted their defeat with grace, quietly putting up with the punishments the ministry had chosen to bestow on them, Lucius had become angry and violent. He blamed ‘mudbloods’ and ‘blood traitors’ for their situation, for the possibility of being stripped of his fortune and for the state of house arrest they had been placed in.

“This is brilliant, my boy!” Lucius lunged forward and grabbed Draco by the shoulders, “Brilliant!”.

“It… it is?” Draco stuttered, taken aback by his father's unexpected joy.

“Yes! We can use this to help bring honour back to the Malfoy name, to bring us back to the power we were in before, you see? We just need to come up with a plan-”

“-No!” 

Lucius’ gleeful face dropped into one of confusion, “N-no?” 

Lucius wasn’t used to hearing his son say no to him.

Draco felt his father's hands tighten around his shoulders, before he shrugged them off, needing little strength to dismantle his father’s ever weakening grip.

“I just want to get my exams and go.” Draco replied firmly, “We lost, Father. One day you’re going to have to accept that.”

As much as it pained Draco to admit it, Ron was right; he had needed that sandwich. 

It had gone nightfall before Draco finally made his way into the castle and the great feast had been and gone. He approached Professor Flitwick somewhat sheepishly, expecting a lecture about arriving so late into the night as he marked him present, but Flitwick didn’t say a word. He simply nodded his head and opened the door to allow him in. This confused Draco; but he secretly thanked whatever higher power there was that he didn’t have to explain to the Professor the reason for his tardiness. 

He had been told in the letter that the Prefect’s floor had been converted into a dormitory for the eighth year, so Draco straightened his shoulders and raised his chin, ready to finally face what he had been dreading all day when something stopped him in his tracks. 

One of the walls that sat at the entrance of the school had been completely cleared of the old paintings, and instead held portraits. Portraits of all the people that died four months ago. 

The breath caught in Draco’s throat as the commemoration left him stiff; staring up at all the faces he had seen many times in his nightmares. But in his nightmares their faces were often frozen in fear, in pain, with blood painting their skin and rubble caught in their hair. Sometimes their faces would distort into vile twists, or their skin would melt off the bone. Occasionally they would talk to Draco, shout at him. Tell him it’s his fault they were dead, his fault they were murdered. Those were the ones that often had Draco retching over the toilet for the rest of the night. 

Here they were smiling, happy. Their most joyous moments caught in moving images, laughing and having fun. That’s how people wanted to remember them, Draco supposes. People want to remember when they were happy, not fighting for their lives. 

Draco’s rapid heart felt like it skipped a beat when his eyes landed on one particular image. In the corner of the wall, near the bottom, but there nonetheless. The brown eyes of Gregory Goyle burned into the grey of Draco’s. 

“Greg…” Draco whispered, stepping closer. 

Goyle was someone who was definitely a frequent visitor in Draco’s night terrors, and one of the rather more terrifying ones at that. More than a few nights a week Draco could still feel the flames lick his ankles after watching Gregory slip and be consumed by the inferno. He could still feel the smoke choke his lungs and make his head spin, making climbing for his life all the more difficult. Had Potter not come back, Draco for sure would have met the same fate as Gregory.

Suddenly, Draco selfishly thought of what would have happened if he had died that day. Would he be on this wall too? 

Once again he let his eyes roam the wall, analysing the different faces looking back at him. A photo of Lavender Brown in the stunning blue dress she wore to the Yule Ball smiled at him as she curtseyed to the camera. Colin Creevey proudly holding a photography trophy beamed at him, showing off the biggest, toothiest smile. Fred Weasley, slipping some sort of sweet gummy into Professor Flitwick’s cloak pocket cheekily winked at him, holding a finger to his lips in a ‘shushing’ motion. 

Giving a small, sad smile to Gregory Goyle’s portrait, Draco concluded that no, he wouldn’t have been included on this wall had he died that day.

-

The doors of the eighth year common room glared down at Draco, judging him for hesitating. He could hear the commotion coming from inside, lively chatter, clinking of glasses and what sounded like a riveting game of Wizard Chess, but the loudest thing of all was the sound of Draco’s heartbeat in his ears. 

He had made it through the train journey with no incidents, his interaction with Weasley was tame compared to what Draco had imagined would happen the second he showed his face here. But this was the real test; walking into a room of people who he’d looked in the eye as he stood among the Death Eaters, stood on the side of the man who killed their friends; their family. 

Deciding he had behaved cowardly long enough, Draco straightened his tie and smoothed down his robes, before opening the doors and stepping through. At first it seemed like no one noticed, the chatter carried on and no one seemed to glance his way. That didn’t last long, though. Eventually, people saw him, and gradually a hush fell over the room, until the only sound that could be heard was the crackling of the fire. 

For a moment, everyone was still, in shock. Draco stood like a deer in the headlights, but he kept his chin high and his face stern, hoping the pure fear that ran through his veins remained undetected by the crowd. No one seemed to know what to say, or what to do. Draco didn’t either. Until a voice piped up in the crowd. 

“Is this some kind of a joke?” 

Draco’s gaze immediately zoned in on the source of the voice, finding Seamus Finnigan, rising from the sofa near the fireplace; looking around incredulously as if to make sure he wasn’t the only one who saw Draco walk through the door. 

“I better not be seeing you, you better not be here right now.” Finnigan spoke again. 

Everyone’s eyes remained on Draco, some still in disbelief like Finnigan’s, some in mild to moderate disgust, and some blank faces. Draco noted Granger and Weasley sat in the corner of the room, and came to the assumption Weasley had already told Granger he was here considering the lack of surprise on her face. Or perhaps she was smart enough to know McGonagall would have invited him back despite his current reputation. That was also highly likely. He briefly noted in the back of his mind that Potter wasn’t anywhere in sight. 

“Well, evidently I am here, Finnigan. So why don’t you just fuck off and mind your business.” Draco shot back, feeling vulnerable as thirty pairs of eyes bore into his skin. 

Finnigan scoffed, and started moving closer; “What did you have to do to be allowed back here, huh? Did daddy buy your way in?” 

Draco looked Finnigan in the eye and scowled, daring him to go down this road. 

“Oh wait,” he continued, stepping closer “See, I heard your family is getting stripped of it’s fortune. Daddy doesn’t have any money anymore, does he?”

The room erupted into a low murmur, as people started whispering to each other; eyes flitting between Finnigan and Draco. 

“I’m warning you, Finnigan.” Draco replied in a low voice.

He knew this is the exact opposite of what he should be doing, of what he planned. He wanted to keep his head down, and get through the year quietly. He wanted to get his exams and leave as soon as possible, so he could get a good job and buy a house for his mother and father to live in if they weren’t allowed to keep the manor. He knew fighting with someone the second he stepped into the building was the easiest way to ensure he gets his second chance at a future ripped out from under his feet, but he couldn’t help it. Finnigan knew where to prod him so that it hurt. 

“Maybe your mother slept with the Minister, is that it?” 

Seamus knew exactly where it hurt.

Draco reached into his robes and pulled out his wand, aiming it at Seamus. Quick to recognise what Draco was doing, Seamus raised his in turn. The room gasped and people scuttled to the edges of the room, trying to keep out of the line of fire.

“Don’t you say a word against my mother!”

“What are you gonna do about it Malfoy? You’re finished! You may be back in school but no one is ever going to forget how you and your cowardly family ran away when the going got tough.”

“lingua ligatum”

Without thinking, Draco cast a tongue-tying curse at Finnigan; who easily deflected it with a wave of his wand. Gasps and cries could be heard as the spell was thrown, people covered their heads and ducked away from the conflict. 

Finnigan chuckled darkly, apparently not even in shock at Draco casting the curse, and turned to look around the room; “You see that?” he gestured to Draco with his wand before turning back to him. 

“Once a Death Eater, always a Death Eater.” 

Draco broke his gaze with Finnigan and looked around the room. People looked at him with fear and anger in their eyes as they cowered away. It was exactly what he was expecting; exactly what he had hoped to avoid.

And now he tried to curse someone in the common room. 

He quickly lowered his wand and turned on his heel. He knew it was late, and all his things would be waiting for him in the dormitory; but he couldn’t stay there. So he did what he seemed to have become very good at these days, and he ran. 

As he pushed his way back through the doors, he heard Finnigan call behind him.

“That’s it, run away! Just like you always do!”.

And he was right. 

People who asked to be tagged:

@fantasticreads0402

#Wahey chapter 2 #doing this whole chapter thing is fun #the snitch seeker #draco malfoy #seamus finnigan #harry potter #good draco malfoy #draco malfoy redemption #hogwarts #slytherin #fic #hp #harry potter fanfic #harry potter fanfiction #drarry #its not really drarry #but shes a popular tag cmon #hermione granger #ron weasley #gregory goyle #angst

[bitter-opal]

Yellowface is Alive and Well in Steven Universe

Ok, so I know this post is going to get a lot of hate, but

Steven Universe treats its POC horribly. Today Is I’ll be talking about the racism towards Asians and Asian-coded characters in the show since I have personal experience with that.

Definitions and Terms:

A quick overview of Yellowface: Yellowface consists of very narrow eyes, buck teeth or tooth gaps, and very yellow skin. This was used as justification to keep Chinese people out of the US using Chinese Exclusion Acts during the 19th century after Chinese immigrants were used to build railroads or clean laundry. It was used as an argument for US imperialism of the Philippines after the Spanish-American War concluded. It was also used as anti-Japanese sentiment to justify the shameful Japanese internment camps of the 1940s.

Remember the episode “Steven’s Dream” where Greg and Steven go to visit Korea. They made an anti-Asian joke. The joke here was that all Asians look the same. Asians have to deal with this kind of shit everyday. That we all look alike or that our cultures are interchangeable. But oh, it gets even worse than that.

Connie: Connie is Southeast Asian. But she constantly gets shunted to the side as Steven’s sidekick. First, Connie is portrayed as a nerd, and although I am a nerd, that is a hint that they would go the stereotypical route. The nerdy Asian is a stereotype used to hold Asians to perfectionistic standards and justify being shunted to the side because we’re “nerds.” In season 2, Pearl conditions her to serve Steven and put her own safety last, which is extremely unhealthy. She’s even called a “pet” by Blue Diamond, which is super racist. A brown kid should never ever be called a pet. And then I see people on Tumblr defending Blue Diamond, but if you want to avoid being racist, awful epithets like this are something to avoid completely. Also, whenever she fuses with Steven into Stevonnie, their fusion is sexualized, which is typical of Asian fetishization (something I have had to deal with unfortunately irl) When she is rightfully upset at Steven, her concerns and feelings are considered non-issues. Why? Because she’s a POC and POC don’t matter in Steven Universe.

Lars: just everything about his character was done completely wrong by the crew. Lars has always been colored orange on the show, which is pretty weird unless you contextualize it as another form of racism. If they were going for tan, then the tan they did was really shitty. Lars is implied to be Filipino based on the dish he makes right before he gets kidnapped. His dish ends up thrown in the trash out of shame, which is a big old middle finger to Asian culture and food. He’s portrayed as a jerk before he gets kidnapped. He’s the only human character to explicitly die...Apparently the only way an Asian character is good is if they die for the white hero and/or get their skin turned much, much lighter. And then, Steven leaves him stranded in space. Like hell, this kid had a very high chance of dying again, and you fucking left him?! But if it was your racist Uncle Andy, I’m sure you wouldn’t leave him behind. That is pure racism. But here’s what really shocked me to the core:

Blatant Yellowface with Jade: This one may require some historical context since many people think that it’s impossible in modern day cartoons, but I see it on a regular basis. Yellowface is defined above. Can you figure out what’s wrong here? Hint: It’s the facial features of the fusion. Neither of Jade’s components have the features of the fusion: specifically the tooth gap and the “slanted eyes.” Jade is also stereotypically associated with East Asian cultures especially China. When using such a culturally charged gemstone, you need to make sure that you’re not being racist about it. This is what the crewinverse failed to do. They gave the fusion “slanted” eyes and a tooth gap even though a quick Internet search says this screams Yellowface. This blatant example of Yellowface is not talked about a lot and I wished to draw more attention to this extremely problematic depiction. When I watched the episode that night, that shit seriously traumatized me. It made me stop watching the show for any kind of pleasure because a show that shows this much disrespect and mockery of Asians does not deserve my viewership.

Conclusion: This kind of racist motherfuckery by the show is extremely upsetting especially to kids who grew up in racist or intolerant environments. All the time, Asians are often considered foreign even if they were born and/or raised here. Asians are often fetishized, which often leads to sexual harassment and/or assault. Just because something claims to be “progressive” or “racially diverse” does not mean it is unproblematic or anti-racist. Because this allegedly progressive cartoon committed at least 4 majorly racist acts against just Asian people..

#su crit #anti asian racism #anti racism #tw: yellowface #tw: racism

[onisiondrama]

Patreon Stream 11/26/19

Sorry I’m late on this. Notes:

The video starts mid conversation. I think Greg is talking about the recent Joker movie. I only figured that out because one of his Patreons keep randomly saying “Joaquin Phoenix” really loud. Greg’s comparing Arthur Fleck to himself. He says Arthur goes through the same shit he went through and they look the same. Says he has the same hairdo, white man, 8 years older than him, trying to be an entertainer but everyone hates him. “Jesus christ this sounds so familiar.” He says he felt personally attacked because Joaquin acted the same way Greg acted in his old videos. (I can’t tell if this is a joke.)

He says people called him “the Joker of Youtube” (I think he’s getting mixed up with the “villain”. People used to call him that after New Media Rockstars called him “Youtube’s Perfect Villain” back in 2013. I’ve personally never seen anyone call him the “Joker” of youtube.) He says he didn’t understand it because he wasn’t Heath Ledger, he just imitated him, but when the new movie came out it he felt exposed. He said it felt so personal.

A Patreon suggests Greg was the inspiration for the new Joker and Greg says he doubts that. He says he thinks a lot of people go through these experiences and the Joker in the comics pre-dates him and he was always a failed comedian. He says just the way Joaquin played the joker felt personal. He says this was the first time he felt like someone understood him. All he needs is the traumatic brain injury and that would have been him.

Says he knows someone with mental illness that takes a lot of medication and if you combine that person with him you’d get Joaquin‘s joker.

Greg talks about the plot and says every piece of it was mind blowing. He says it was one of the greatest films he’s ever seen. He says the Christian Bale series was gold and the Joker movie was platinum. He says it’s because it’s so relatable and real feeling.

Greg says not a lot of people know a scene in Joker seems like a personal attack on David Letterman because Joaquin went on his show years ago and he was made fun of. Greg says it was really bad, he was shitting all over Joaquin. (btw Greg keeps pronouncing Joaquin as “yo-kwon” even though all his Patreons have been pronouncing his name correctly this whole time. Thought I’d point it out.) He says it’s one of the most uncomfortable things he’s ever seen and Greg took that as Joaquin telling David Letterman he wants to kill him.

Greg says when he was in the air force these guys were bragging about “double fucking” a girl he knew. He says he thought the girl was great. He says it didn’t bother him that they were bragging about double fucking her, but they said she had pancake nipples and that made him really mad. He says he likes big nipples, but she was embarrassed, publicly shamed for her body. He says he wished he could tell her she was great the way she was, but he couldn’t because he was married.

A Patreon says she noticed a lot of guys with long hair have tiny nipples. Greg disagrees. He says when somebody gets top surgery, their nipples look smaller so he thinks it’s a flat chested thing. (lol um they reduce the size of the areola during the surgery, which is why it looks smaller)

A Patreon brings up a tweet Greg made about people from the UK changing their accent because he’s fucking them? Or something? One of his sexual tweets. Greg says he got some upset messages from Patresons about that. He says it’s satire because he’s laughing while he’s tweeting it. He says he likes it when people who are “in a position of anger” get mad when they read it. (I'm not 100% sure what he meant by that, but I think he’s saying he likes making people that dislike him angry.)

A Patreon says people hate Greg, but they pay him and watch his while streams to comment on them. Greg says he hasn’t been reading hate.

He says he’s been lucky on twitter because he’s been generating buzz. Greg says his twitter is all inclusive and he’s gotten offers from guys because of his sexual tweets. He says a guy gave him his instagram.

Someone randomly asks if anyone remembers Ray William Johnson. A bunch of people say yes. Greg says RWJ got sued and lost. His Patreons ask about it and Greg says he was sued by a copyright company. He says people think they have more copyright protection then they do. He says they think it’s fair use, then they lose their case.

They talk about Madame. Greg explains the situation to a Patreon. He says it’s harder when they use someone else’s music because music is more copyright protected. (she was claimed because of his music, according to him. Idk the details.)

Greg says he purchases a license for his background music for videos. He says it’s usually cheap. He suggests Digital Juice. 

Everyone talks about times their videos were claimed because of music. Someone asks about manual claims. Greg says when you do that Youtube will respond and say “we’re feeling concerned about this claim so can you please back it up with documents”, then he does and they move forward.

Greg says Youtube used to make a lot of money off of stolen copyright content. 

Greg says the golden age of Youtube was 2007-2009, before he made it. He says it was like a community back then.

Greg says before Youtube, he would upload videos to videos.google.com and a lot of other places. He says he did well on google’s video site.

Greg says when his videos get blocked in countries now he doesn’t care.

Greg says it’s crazy when you root for the bad guy in a movie. He says he loved the joker movie. He thinks everyone that's been bullied by normies can relate. Someone asks what a normie is and he says it’s someone who had everything handed to them. (lol Greg trying to use modern slang always hurts)

They keep going on about how real it was and how great it was. Says it tackled mental health, blah blah.

I forgot to mention this before, but Greg says his hair is greasy because he put Vaseline in it??

Greg says someone sent him a hit list of his Patreons someone made for people to harass them. He saw Lizard Queen was on there and he felt bad because she’s not a supporter anymore. He says she must be pissed for still paying for pledging to him.

He explains the hit list more and some Patreons say that explains what happened to them, they got messaged. They don’t care, they say their minds aren’t easily changed. A Patreon says a lot of them (patreons) have been going out there to show how ridiculous they (people on twitter) are being and they don’t listen so why should they? 

Someone says one of the antis twitters were banned for harassment. Greg says he never gets banned, but when he reports people they get banned because he actually reports threats.

Patreons continue to talk about harassment and Greg says if you don’t read things from people you don’t follow you’re good.

[imhereforbvcky]

Vivid - Part 4

Masterlist  -  Series Masterpage

Summary: Have you ever met someone who completely embodies a color? Not an aura, not synesthesia. Just… They walk into the room and when you spot them, you think to yourself, “Wow. That is a walking hurricane.” When Clint Barton serendipitously meets a free-spirited stranger, he sees red. Chapter: After dropping in on Clint unexpectedly, you are the one left surprised. 

Word Count: 2641

A/N: I’m not even going to pretend I didn’t go for the low-hanging fruit of plot points here. Sorry, not that sorry. I grew tired of belaboring series for the sake of ingenuity. It’s fanfiction, not a pulitzer novel. I want to enjoy writing it sometimes.

1:30am was early. Or was it late, technically if you hadn’t slept yet? Too late for most people, at any rate. But not for you, and not for Clint.

It had been that kind of week and you’d celebrated its conclusion with that kind of night. Which had led you giggling and bumbling into the bodega. And that excursion, of course, then led to thinking of Clint so fondly that you decided to drop by his place.

At 1:30 in the morning.

Totally normal.

“Clint!” Your voice clanged through the open windows of his apartment where he had slung himself over the couch with a two year old bag of frozen peas against his cheek.

He bolted upright, waiting as if he’d dreamt it, as if it had been some phantom of the concussion he was now sporting. Natasha stood in the kitchen, stuffing spinach into the blender but perked an eyebrow at him. He ignored her with great effort.

“Clint, buzz me in!” you called again and this time he crawled to the window and peeked just over the sill, fingertips clinging to the peeling wood. “My hands are full!”

He could see now that it was true. You balanced an enormous pizza box on one forearm and squished a tub of ice cream and a 2-litre of coke in the other.

“Shut the fuck up!” a neighbor hollered and Clint cringed, ducking back below the window.

“You shut the fuck up!” You snapped back.

Clint chuckled from his spot with his back to the wall, knees curled to his chest with the streetlight’s orange glow shooting just over him like a failed search-light.

This was one of the things he liked about you, though it scared him: you were trouble, red hot emotion constantly bubbling just below the surface. Sure, you laughed quickly, but you also cried at Finding Nemo, and angered to boiling at the very first offense. His neighbor experienced the full force of it tonight.

“It’s 1:30 in the morning! Go home!”

“Yeah, I’m aware, Greg. Thanks for the time check!” you shouted back. “Clint! Pizza – burning! Ice cream – freezing!”

“This is bullshit,” the neighbor grumbled. “I’m callin’ the cops!”

“You do that! You fuckin’ do that!”

Natasha snorted from the kitchen. “Are you gonna get that or?”

“When they get here, I’ll make sure to mention those neat little five-leaf plants you’ve got in your bathroom window! They’re so green!” You continued your tirade until you heard the sharp buzz of the door unlocking. “And the smell, boy I think a skunk might’ve walked by…!”

“Fuck you!”

“Nice chat, Greg!” you hollered as you tugged the door open with your elbow.

Inside Natasha stood at the intercom with a wicked grin on her lips. Clint buried his face in his hands, elbows on his knees.

“Why did you do that? Ow!” he complained at the pressure of his own hands on his bruised cheekbone.

“Because you didn’t,” she shrugged, propping the door open by the deadbolt. “Were you just going to let your girl get arrested? That is her right? Your secret person?”

“She’s not a secret. She’s also not… my girl.”

“If it’s not a secret why were you hiding?”

“Because it’s almost 2am and you’re here! What do you think she’ll make of that?” he snapped.

Natasha scowled at him. “That I’m your friend. Who’s keeping an eye on you after you got pistol-whipped by a Hulk-sized alien on an assignment.”

Before Clint could complain further you were pushing through the door.

“Okay, I got pepperoni because I’m cheap and let’s be honest; it’s the best.”

He’d jumped to his feet to help you, taking the pizza as you shifted the ice cream and coke out of your arms.

“Pepperoni’s my favorite.” He smiled something soft and warm.

Spending time with Clint always felt like no time at all. Like you were exactly where you needed to be and time didn’t matter. Every last thing felt comfortable and content and you didn’t worry about a damn thing. The buzzing fire in your veins settled to a cool shiver. Your favorite place in the city was standing right there under the relaxed  calm of his smile.

“Yeah, I know,” you grinned, finally turning your eyes up to him. The smile dropped as quickly as it came. “Holy shit! Your face!”

“I mean, I know I’m no Steve Rogers, but that’s a little harsh,” he joked.

“It’s a very good face, except for the grapefruit sized bruise,” you cooed, holding his chin and turning his head side with exaggerated scrutiny. “What the hell happened?!”

Finally, your fingers slid over the sides of his neck until they rested on his shoulder. It was just a light touch, just a flutter, just enough to excite a shiver up his neck and over his scalp. Goosebumps prickled across his skin as the only evidence.

“Jerk snuck up on me,” he hedged. This wasn’t a conversation he wanted to have, so he shrugged and tipped his head, leaning slightly into your lingering touch. “I’ve had worse.”

“You need some ice.”

Despite all his wishing, you released him. Your fingertips still tingled with the scratch of his stubble as you’d moved over his skin.

The second you turned for the kitchen, your racing heart stopped completely.

“I… h-hi,” you managed, eyes wide and frozen on Natasha.

She waved her fingers in a fluid sweep and pulsed the blender on the smoothie she’d been graciously waiting to finish making.

“Did uh…” you murmured, turning to Clint while he lifted to his cheek the pack of frozen peas Natasha had tossed at him not ten minutes earlier. “Did you know there’s an Avenger in your kitchen?”

He chuckled, glancing to Natasha whose brow pinched together slightly for the briefest moment.

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, she’s keeping an eye on the…” he pointed to his cheek, to the violent purple bruise blossoming across his skin like the purple-black petals of a superstition iris.

“Uh-huh. Uh-huh,” you answered, eyes back on Natasha, in total awe. You’d seen her on CNN for fuck’s sake. She exposed HYDRA. And told Capitol Hill to fuck off. And not even the deepest halls of the US government knew what else.

Yet here she stood in your friend’s kitchen. At two in the morning.

“She and I… we go way back…” Clint started and stopped. How the hell was he supposed to explain his relationship with Nat? It was well beyond friendship, closer than family. There was so much love, but not the same kind of stomach flipping, tongue glued to your teeth, tripping over your feet sort of love that clawed up from somewhere long forgotten whenever you breezed into the room, all red and alive and gleaming. Either relationship was well beyond words to Clint. Certainly beyond his word bank.

“Oh,” you nodded. Then a moment later, “Oh!”

Natasha caught your assumption immediately and turned to Clint with a sharp look. He was too busy trying to find words that would never suffice to stop the freight train that had just jumped the tracks in your mind.

“I… you guys are…” you stammered, walking backward toward the door and pointing between them. “I just didn’t think you had a um… Well not that you couldn’t,” you laughed anxiously. “I mean, you’re funny and so kind and you’ve got those arms there, and shit,” you slammed an open palm on your forehead. “I’m just uh… I’m gonna go.”

By the time you’d finished rambling you had backed your way to the door with a thumb pointing over your shoulder. Without another fumbled word, you spun on the spot and slipped out.

“Damn it. Damn it. Damn it.” Clint complained. With each curse, his forehead thunked against the counter top

“Probably not good for the concussion, Barton,” Natasha chuckled

“That’s alright. A coma would be better right about now anyway.”

There was a light knock before you peeked back inside. Clint perked up and breathed your name, relieved beyond words to see your face again, when he’d thought he’d blown it, lost it already and entirely.

“I’m just gonna…” you took three long strides to the kitchen and swiped the tub of ice cream off the counter before scampering back out with even more haste.

Natasha burst into laughter. Chest full, and dimples deeply carved with mirth. Clint slid to the floor with a groan.

“So are you gonna stop her or do I have to do everything?”

“Stop her how? Say what?”

“Well for starters tell her you’re an Avenger. We’re teammates and frie—“

“She knows who I am,” he grumbled, reaching overhead for the pizza box.

“She knows Clint Barton, the idiot who drinks coffee all night long and eats way too much pizza. The guy who’s always there at two a.m., who makes her laugh, and who apparently has nice arms,” she chuckled.

“Shut up,” he argued with a grin slowly dragging over his face.

“She absolutely does not know what you do for a living.” She handed him the smoothie and he scowled at it.

“I saw her at a promotional fundraiser,” he argued. “She had to know. It’s the only reason I was there.”

“Clint. You were SHIELD first: a spy. Your identity was protected. Then the battle of New York, you mostly kept to rooftops; the media didn’t exactly get any close-ups. You don’t do the press meetings. Unless someone’s looking for Hawkeye especially… you can get away with being a little bit anonymous.”

“Shit,” he mumbled through a bite of pizza. “She said something about there being Avengers at the fundraiser, I thought she was joking! And she totally froze when she recognized you… She has no idea, does she?”

Natasha offered a sympathetic look and a shrug.

“This is embarrassing. How have I never talked about work?”

“I think it’s nice,” she curled up on the floor next to him, stealing a sip of the smoothie. “She just likes you. And you have something outside of the job. It’s good. You need that. We all do.”

He nodded, scooping up another slice of pizza. “I need to tell her though.”

“Obviously.”

“How does she not see it?”

“That you’re Hawkeye or that you’re head over heels?”

He scowled at her and pushed his glass back into her hands. “This smoothie’s gross.”

A week and a half later and Clint had not told you a thing. Instead, he crouched on the edge of the rooftop, peering down at the row of warehouses. Some of them were abandoned. The rest had simply gone still for the night.

Steady fingers spread like a claw over the concrete. Lightly booted feet curled into sharp demi-pointe. If he weren’t in dark leather and neoprene, strapped over and over with sleek pointed weapons and exactly one SHIELD issue handgun, he might’ve looked like a dancer. Clint was always light on his feet, tall and strong in a way that made him agile and lithe.

“Something’s not right,” he worried aloud, clear blue eyes flashing on the small group of giggling twenty-somethings that teetered into the building he was meant to be watching. Abandoned warehouse, one door east and two south of his position.

“Ya think?” Bucky grumbled, watching through the scope of his rifle as the last of them disappeared behind the heavy steel door. The distant ker-thunk of its closing echoed up to his ears a moment later and his finger twitched over the safety. He knew it was in place. Bucky knew his guns like they were permanently attached to his body, but he checked it just in case.

These did not look like the villains they were after.

“That’s the sixth group of idiots in band tees to go in since we got up here.” Clint relaxed by a hair now that there was nothing and no one to see down below. His heels met concrete once more, and he squared his body over his knees. He still looked ready to leap, but less like he was mid-lunge, less like a swooping predator. “It’s supposed to be empty.”

Empty except for the group dealers the Avengers had tracked down. The ones who serviced illegally salvaged alien weaponry out of the abandoned warehouse one building east and two south of Clint’s current perch. The club they intended to lasso tonight in the building that was now teeming with bystanders.

“Only question now…” Bucky dragged the cross-hairs of his scope onto a new group headed toward the building. “Is whether it’s just bad intel, or a set up.”

Clint sighed and turned his attention to the small group as well. A couple of women. They seemed happy. One of them passed something small to another and hopped forward, a small dance in every step. Clint hadn’t noticed he was smiling. It was small and involuntary, the tiniest curve of his lips. The woman threw her head back and held a bottle to her lips, no doubt singing into it. Clint caught a glimmer of color when they passed under a street light and froze.

Red.

“No, no, no, no, no,” he murmured, rapid-fire. This time, crouching further even than before, his fingers curled around the thick ledge of the wall and his feet remained beneath him, arched up on pads, ready to leap.

“What?” Bucky pulled away from his scope, scanning the area for danger, for whatever had Clint so literally on edge. “What do you see?” Eye back on the scope, he saw nothing unusual about the group. So he swept the door, the windows, the roof of the building. Empty. “Clint!”

“Not here,” his voice was a breathless plea. “She shouldn’t be here.”

“Who?!”

Clint looked frantic, fingers gripping and regripping the rough ledge like every fresh hold bolstered him in place, reminded him that he was part of a team and he needed to hold his position.

“Barton!” Bucky barked again. “Who?”

“The one with the coke bottle!”

“Yeah?” Bucky settled on her through the scope, red bottle, red cap inches from equally red lips. Same band tee as everyone else. To Bucky, a harmless, unremarkable civilian. “I’m not seeing it, man. This is a live mission, Clint! If you see something off, you’ve gotta tell me. Who the hell is she?”

“She’s—she’s… I don’t know… We--I…”

Agitated by his partner’s distress, Bucky followed the woman, kept her tightly within his cross-hairs and with a gentle practiced finger snapped the safety off.

“She’s a friend. A… She’s my person.”

“Are you fucking kidding me, Barton?!” Bucky clicked the safety back in place and glared at his partner, his friend. He was ready to fire on a civilian because Clint couldn’t form a sentence when he laid eyes on a goddamn crush.

“I’ve got action on the southwest corner,” Sam’s voice crackled over the comlink. “Definitely packing.”

Bucky, still glaring at Clint, saw his eyes go wide and the decision flash firm in his jaw. Bucky only managed two words after that.

“Clint, don’t—!“

But Clint had already launched himself over the edge of the building.

It wasn’t a long drop. The buildings weren’t skyscrapers, just a couple of stories high, just enough for a few forklifts to create monuments to forgotten consumerism out of crates and pallets.

His landing was loud anyway. Clint rolled onto the empty roof of a delivery truck with the deep bellow of reverberating aluminum. The noise was thunderous, almost matching Bucky’s anger, but Clint kept rolling, right down the windshield until he found his feet on the hood and leapt forward onto crumbling pavement. Then he ran.

“The hell was that?” Natasha worried in Bucky’s earpiece.

“Barton’s lost his goddamn mind over a girl,” he grumbled in answer. “He’s on the ground now. I’ll cover.”

Chapter 5 >>

#clint x reader #clint x barton reader #clint x reader angst #clint barton x reader angst #clint fanfic #clint barton fanfic #avengers fanfic #vivid 4 #vivid part 4

[calliecat93]

Red vs Blue RTX 2019 Panel Masterpost

As many of you know, due to RT being unable to sign on a streaming partner, they couldn’t stream RTX. We weren’t sure if the RvB panel would be recorded or not, and so far no word on their end… but there is good news! Someone at the panel went and recorded it themselves, so we are able to see it! And as such, as I did last year, I can do a masterpost for it! Now they didn’t really reveal any major news, which is expected since the season just wrapped up a month ago. But some cool stuff did come up! So let's talk about it!

Panelists: Miles Luna (showrunner/writer/director for Chorus, co-writer for SIngularity, voice of Felix) Jason Weight (head writer for SIngularity)  Josh Ornelas (co-director) Austin Clark (co-director) Greg Slagel (show producer)  Matt Hullum (CEO of RT, executive producer, voice of Sarge, Doc/O’Malley, and Wyoming) Burnie Burns (series creator and the original showrunner/writer/director, CCO of RT, executive producer, voice of Church and Lopez)

“I’m Burnie Burns, and my character is dead.” Starting on a happy note clearly!

For questions this year, they had people submit them on Twitter with the hashtag #rtxrvb that Burnie will read off throughout the panel.

Jason found being handed the reigns of finishing the current arc super intense, but he was happy since after becoming attached to certain characters when acting as an assistant writer for S16, eh got to treat them how he wanted to treat them! He especially wanted to spoil Donut throughout this season. Miles felt the same way about Tucker when doing Chorus.

One moment that Jason beings up that stuck out to him is in S5, when the Reds see Kai nude… but Donut was more concerned about how the Blue Base had better lighting than they did. It felt like there was depth there that he wanted to look into.

There had been concerns from Miles and some of the others about if Donut could pull off being the lead… and clearly, the answer is that he absolutely can!

This was the first time that Josh and Austin were put into full-blown director positions for an entire season. Austin, in particular, went from an assistant machinimator to a main machinmator, to a machinima director within a few years (he began at S14). They both found it scary, especially with how much power they now had, but having the direction from Jason’s writing greatly helped.

Miles brings up how usually the writer and director for RvB are the same people, this being the first regular season where that wasn’t the case. As such, Jason had to wait like everyone else to see the final product, but he was very pleased with the results. He mentions the scene in Episode 9 with Wash and Carolina as an example of how much he loved the direction done with the episodes.

They talk about some of the things that you can and can’t do in machinima and how certain Halo titles have certain quirks that make filming more difficult than it at first looks. For example, in Halo 4 they always raised their guns when moving and they had to figure out how to work with that.

One thing that Jason wishes that the characters could do would be to sit or lay down, which is impossible to do within machinima. Burnie talks about how there were certain verbs that they couldn't use, like ‘sit’, and one thing that he wished that they could do was to point at things instead of having to say ‘look over in that direction’.

Question: what’s it like to take over RvB and pick up form different storylines. Burnie talks about how he likes that with the show, there are certain points where they tell a complete story. So if you want to top after Blood Gulch or Freelancer or whatever, there is a point where the story complete’s itself, and you can jump off. Though there is quite a bit of a back catalog for those who have to pick it up next…

Jason, unlike others, had to jump on during an in-progress story. As such, he didn’t make many new characters due to the size of the cast already and the need to wrap up Joe’s story. 

Early on, Miles, Jason, and Joe worked on planning the season out and figuring out the time travel stuff. Due to a slightly slimmer done, they couldn’t go as hard with animation as last time, so there was a lot of discussion on what could and couldn’t be done. It is why they decided to go back through the older Halo iterations since going form say Halo 2 to 4 would make it more visually striking.

Miles recounts one point when planning where Jason and Joe were arguing over how they wanted a certain moment to go. Miles had to step in and remind them that it was a paradox, so they were both right and wrong so they needed to just pick something. In general, figuring out timelines and recounting where every character was and what they were doing was very difficult and stressful and while it was fun, no one wants to do it ever again.

They dubbed the paradox timeline where Wash was and wasn’t shot ‘Schrodinger’s Asshole’ They had to label the timeline in order to figure out where everyone kept going, and Greg, as the producer, had to keep track of it.

Jason tells the story behind Wash’s “Goddamnit!” moment. That episode was written by Miles, who was trying to figure out how Wash would get the info that he needed during the Freelancer shenanigans. Jason asked, “why doesn't he just go to a time period where he and Carolina are already friends and get it there?”. Cue Miles screaming the Wash way!

There was a lot of figuring things out. For example, Jason originally had Locus shooting/killing mooks during the S15 scene… until after it got to machinima, Josh pointed out that Locus didn’t kill anymore at that point. So they went with him shooting people in the kneecaps!

One of the scenes that Austin found difficult was in Episode 9 during the shootout in Halo 4. Austin had never done machinima in Halo 4, so that was a bit of a learning curve. Miles talks about the original S11 version of that scene and he had to constantly change the set for three weeks due to various things getting broken and destroyed during the fight. When writing for Episode 9, he just went ‘Josh, Austin please forgive me’

Miles talks about Greg’s role as a producer and how big of a relief it was to have him scheduling things and keeping them on track, especially during the more stressful days where he’d suggest doing some less intense scenes of characters just talking. There were a lot of times where Greg had to tell them that they couldn’t do a certain thing and they had to go and come up with something again, but it was ultimately necessary to have had happen.

There were a LOT of times where Jason wrote something that they really liked… and then had to tell him that they couldn't do it, especially due to the budget and the schedule. It was hard, but Jason was very happy with how things came out in the end. And there were times where they were able to make it work, like having black holes.

Another question from the audience was if Locus’ Sword Quest would mean that he’d get an alien baby. Miles, in his opinion, thought that Crunchbite was just super fucked up and a big fat liar. Burnie is all for Locus having a baby, however. Greg even brings up the alien pregnancy poster shown in the finale, so it can’t be that rare, right?

As far as if Locus would be a good parent, Miles says maybe and ‘he needs therapy’.

Regarding the changes done to Chrovos, Jason (like the rest of us) saw Kalirama and got excited about a female villain, so when that ultimately petered out he came up with Lady Chrovos. How he cast Lee Eddy is that he saw her at the Camp Camp panel the previous year and really wanted to give her a role somehow.

He described Chrovos in the notes as a ‘predatory Glenn Close crossed with Maria from The Sound of Music’. There were also many takes done of Lee’s voice since, due to her expositing a lot, they wanted to make her fun to listen to so that it wouldn’t be boring. The directors eventually brought Jason in to direct via Skype (Jaosn liked int he UK) in order to get the performance that they were looking for, and luckily Lee nailed it.

Jason tended to put a lot of British slang in his scrips, and they had to be cut because no one knew any of them meant.

There were a lot of questions about RvB’s future and where it’s going next. This leads to Burnie asking the panel about how they feel about Halo Infinite and having to switch to that. He talks about his experience with switching engines since it happened several times during his run, such as thinking that they went to Halo 2 too early due to doing it because it was newly released and wanting to go ahead and rush into it. They learned their lesson when switching to Halo 3.

When it came to learning to fit the story into a new engine, Burnie would load whatever iteration he was going to be working with, wonder through Blood Gulch, and look at stuff to figure out what was there and how they can and can't work with things within the limitations that they had.

As for Halo Infinite, Burnie’s looking forward to seeing what can do within it. Miles is super happy to see the classic armor return due to it being much more simplistic. Greg jokes about how they just did a time travel arc, and Halo just so happened to go back to the more retro look. Coincidence?!

Everyone, including the audience, agree that Halo 3 is the one they liked working in best.

Another audience question is what the crew thinks that Caboose’s Starter Pokemon would be.Miles says Miltank due to Caboose misunderstanding what the Pokemon would look like cause… well, ‘tank’. Burnie says Yoshi. Wrong series Burnie! Someone also says Mr. Mine cause then Caboose could play Charades all day.

On the topic of Pokemon, Burnie talks about video game movies like Detective Pikachu, and movies more inspired by video games like the Resident Evil series. RvB has been around during the era where it looked like a video game movie was going to be a blockbuster… and those failed. But now there seems to be some kind of footing forming for video game films that aren't quite like the game, but still works like RvB is for Halo.

Going back to S17, there was a point where they considered re-using old footage from previous seasons to make the workload easier, but aside from a few shots in montages, that didn’t work. Everything had to be re-shot, re-recorded, and they had to get back all the original voices that weren’t on the show anymore for a job they did years ago. A big reason why is because of how the quality has evolved much higher quality things look now, so putting together old Halo footage with new would have been very noticeable.

Speaking of things evolving, Miles talks about how he feels that all the characters, in some form, have changed a lot over the years. Characters like Caboose are nothing like they were in the beginning. They actually did talk for quite a while about if they should have past!Caboose sounds more like he did then or just stick with the current voice. They kept it the same since Sarge had a similar case where the voice sounded nothing like now (cue everyone staring at Matt) but they didn’t change it there, so they didn’t do it for Caboose.

On that though, when everyone turns to look at him, Matt (who had been quiet throughout at this point) reveals that he wanted to do a little game. He often gets asked about Sarge quotes, but he can never remember them. So he wrote down a whole bunch, and so whenever anyone talks to him/asks him something for the rest of the panel, he’ll respond with a random Sarge quote (in this case, he does the Angelina Jolie lines from the Internet vs Real Life PSA). It is absolutely glorious. If you watch the video for any reason, do it for this!

Back on the topic of character evolution though, Miles got obsessed with the idea of Freelancer essentially being like high school when writing the Wash episode and liked the idea of having a character confront who and where they were then and recognizing who you are now.

Speaking of Wash, Jason talks about his and Carolina’s relationship as well as about Wash’s disability. To him, he found it weird how a show about war very rarely had the cast get hurt and how they’re usually killed off instead ( Jason: “Or they’ll die temporarily and come back, like Donut” Miles: “And Church, and Lopez…” Burnie: Lopez had so many lines this season). So he likes this new avenue with Wash.

Burnie, after pointing out how he’s been doing Lopez for so long after it was just supposed to be a dumb joke and he STILL hasn’t learned any Spanish, brings up having to record early Church again, who was very shouty. At this point, Burnie cannot do that for very long before he gives out. I guess that might explain why he sounded somewhat off. Miles has similar problems with other roles, only being able to do David in Camp Camp for so long due to the energy levels and he can no longer use his early!Jaune voice due to his vocal cords no longer being able to hit that range.

The directors threw in some Easter Eggs during the black hole, such as Genkins golf ball form when he knocked one into a black hole in S6. Which… guess I’ll have to rewatch cause I didn’t notice any Easter Eggs at all, but apparently a lot of others did.

They announce some new merch coming up. This includes some new shirts for the Grif Collection line, some shirts like that one released on RT’s Anniversary), and a second wave for the RvB Rivals line.

They also aired the RvB17 Blooper Reel… but due to copyright, this was cut from the video. Apparently, there was some kind of montage of Caboose saying ‘hello’ though. Still, gotta wait for the DVD for that one.

The last few minutes are more audience questions. One is about asking if the machinima team will do anything with the PC version of the Master Chief Collection. Austin says that, if there’s mod support, there could be the possibility of mashing up some of the Halo games. Burnie also talks about Theater Mode and how much of a relief it was to have added to the console versions, so with it coming to all iterations, this is very beneficial to them.

They also talk about how whenever there’s a big Halo-related announcement, they get a lot of questions. Like if they’ll switch to PC after the recent announcement about the Master Chief Collection… while they were already in the middle of filming S17. Whether they will or not they don’t know since they need to look it over first and figure out all the quirks and limitations of the game mechanics first.

Burnie: Does Sarge know any Caboose lines? 

Matt (as Sarge): Quiet Bluetard.”

Question about crossing over RvB with any other RT show. The popular answer is Camp Camp due to their comedic tones. Miles does change his answer to Day 5 just to see how they'd survive without sleep and jokes about how Grif would give in and be a goner within 30 seconds. Other shows thrown out are On the Spot and The Chip Show. Burnie brings up how there’s this in-universe show in Lazer Team and he’d like to see them appear on that.

There was a question about if there would ever be an RvB movie. Burnie asks the audience if they would be interested after this many years, and there is a LOOOOT of cheering. Burnie and Matt have very ominous looks throughout. No answer on if it would ever happen or not, but maybe one day.

“What was your favorite running gag in S17, and why was it shooting Donut?” Give the guy who asked that a medal.

So there was some kind of cut there, so moving on…

Miles talks about (I think) bringing back characters like O’Malley and Kai at the end of Chorus as a way to say goodbye to them. But after Joe and Jason came in, they decided to use those characters more. They especially grew to love Kai, Jason especially due to her filthy humor and absolutely owning it.

They talk about how Tucker and Kai seem similar due to their sexually charged humor… but they are quite different. Tucker’s is essentially a front that he uses to hide his insecurities and build himself up. Kai knows who she is, owns who she is, and you can either accept her or get the Hell out of her way. 

Someone asks for them to recap RvB. Matt takes care of that with the following Sarge quote: “A priest, rabbi, and Grif walk into a bar… and then I kill ‘em!”. Best. Recap. EVER. 

The final question is if they’d ever consider making RvB, or any other machinima series, outside of Halo. They talk about one they did long ago called Panics, which they didn’t continue due to split from the company, and since they have to license the video game footage to do machinima, they couldn’t do more. 

As for RvB switching, that is unlikely to happen since it’s so ingrained into Halo now.

They have considered other machinima shows in the past. Miles would like to do one with Apex Legends… but since it has stuff like lip flaps and all, it wouldn’t work. Austin would like to do something with Call of Duty.

The panel ends with Miles asking the crew in the audience to stand up and everyone gives them applause.

#rvb #this took FOREVER #but I did it!

[norcumii]

For shits and giggles and I honestly couldn’t tell you why, I started listening to the Clone Wars movie commentary, by Filoni and...others?

Putting aside that at least 50% of it is some form of “ALL HAIL GEORGE,” which...yeah. Fine, whatever – there’s been an interesting thread I’m trying to chase down mentally. So, er, late night musings ahead.

They keep talking about how they tossed this line into the editing, or how George is all about tweaking the story in the editing room – and how that’s all about building the final vision. How in order to get a good laugh, in this bit the droid suddenly has the intellectual/philosophical context to ask “Whhhyyyy?” as its being tossed off a cliff to its doom and that was all added several editing rounds in.

And this has been bugging me. Not just because it’s cheap humor and might be good for a startled guffaw but not once one steps back and looks at the picture because ouch, that’s...pretty ugly. Also, this is COMPLETELY ignoring my instincts to snort and be bitchy about George Lucas’ ego and Marcia Lucas saving the OT in the editing room.  

See, my first instinct is to be cautiously approving of this approach. You write a fic, you edit, you edit some more, you get a beta and you tweak depending on their suggestions, and then you post. That’s what these people are talking about, right?

But if that were the case, then why do I spend so much time bitching about how Star Wars NEVER follows through on story lines, and they never spend a fraction of the time we do trying to figure out logistics and political folderol, and – there’s got to be something I’m missing.

I had to step back and look at my usual fonts of inspiration, Aaron Sorkin and Greg Weisman – the latter in particular given how he got tapped for Rebels.

Sorkin is a masterclass pantser. I have no idea what his process is, aside from procrastinating and getting quality scripts in JUUUUST under the wire (or often after that fact). Greg’s more a note-card, organizational type. Not much useful comparing those to what sounds like “George Lucas has An Idea, we try to execute it with our spin, and then Lucas comes in and has more suggestions. If all else fails we pull all-nighters and then wing it for George.”

They’ve mentioned cutting some things, and altering others, so it’s not just a matter of these people just add to things, whereas I know the other two have talked about cutting extraneous stuff a lot. So it’s not something vague about keep cutting the fat.

Something about that notion tweaked a thought, though. The Lucas approach here seems to be taking a storyline, then going in and brushing it up – and the focus seems to be on how to buff up moments. “We have a segment here, how do we give it more punch? Ok, add a joke. How do we buff up the next segment? Apply changes to that thing.” Add in the mantra they keep repeating in the commentary, about how it always has to be new, how for instance if you have a Rancor scene, it can’t just be a rehash or similar to the classic Return of the Jedi rancor scene, it has to have a new twist.

(….OH. And a belated realization that this is one of the things they DIDN’T do for the sequel trilogy, as compared to the prequels! Episode 7 was a rehash, but there wasn’t enough new angles, whereas the prequels were taking the same structure but putting in new scenarios. Maybe? Something for me to chew on later.)

Anyway. What all this does is take a storyline, and focus on those moments.

That DOESN’T look to the greater plot.

Greg approaches a season as a storyline. He has his tiers and tentpost episodes, but it all builds along an arc. Sorkin also has season long plots and themes.

Consequences. The Clone Wars never deals with consequences. They’re so busy punching up a scene they never look to what precedes or follows it, so there’s never any fall out for things other than in a broad, hand-wavy way –

oooooh.

They got so caught up in the theory about this week’s adventure in the Flash Gordon-esque production that they never looked to the overall plot. Like how in soap operas characters would get horrible diseases, need to get organs removed (multiple times) and the like – it’s so tied up in Teh Drama of the moment that there’s never someone going around saying “yeah, uh, this character used to have a kid we might want to remember that.”

So while there’s attempts to show Anakin being disillusioned with the Jedi – see the entire Rako fiasco – there never feels like any actual BUILD there, just moments of “why would you DO that you beTRAYed me Obi-Wan!” without the context we the fans labor so hard to structure. Sure, we can see how Obi-Wan reacts in the few seconds of screentime at the beginning of that arc – hunched over in the Council chamber, with the body language of someone who’s been browbeaten and argued into a fucked up and patently absurd scheme – but we never get more than hints that this is something he never wanted to do.

And then it never gets mentioned again. We can build consequences beyond “and then one day Anakin Falls and becomes Vader!” – I wholeheartedly believe that Rex (one of the most identifiable clones out there) wore Jaig eyes on the Onderon mission entirely as a message to SOMEONE about how he might have to be clandestine, but he’s not about to abandon his identity – but it’s all speculation and personal perspectives.

All the long term consequences are drowned out in the minutia of the moment. Filoni mentioned early on about how the clones check their wounded and call for medics to drive home that these are people, not cannon fodder – while unironically using them as cannon fodder. The only times they’re not used that way is when the deaths are furthering someone’s – usually Rex’s – particular storyline. The bit about a clone calling for a medic is great for a moment, but the followthrough is never pursued unless a different moment might be richer for it and someone on staff happens to remember.

It occurred to me that this is also part of my problems with Avatar the Last Airbender. Look, I’m fascinated by the meta worldbuilding, and some of the themes, but when there’s regular breaks in the dramatic tension by yet another snot joke, I do not have patience for it. I don’t like storytelling that feels the need to step back and jam in humor on the regular every [X] minutes because otherwise executives are worried that the kids will stop caring. And maybe that’s not what’s going on, but if it rubs me that way I’m disinclined to sit through hours and fucking hours of it without an enthusiastic guide.

However, that does explain Lucasfilms’ obsession with Filoni. He seems to thrive on that sort of storybuilding. Take a segment. See how to punch it up. Move on to the next segment.

This, right here, IS one of my problems with Rebels, that was so painful but intermittent through season one. It’s even worse in later seasons – none of which Greg worked on, which. Yeah. Fuck, I am going to have to do that watch through at some point. I mean, throughout Rebels, I could see the worldbuilding and structure, but then it’d get yanked off into left field by this week’s inane gag or absurdist moment or random ass THING they need to cover because oh yeah, they’re trying for an overarching plot and should probably include the thing before it’s immediately relevant.

Back to Clone Wars. I think the problem was too much inspection of segments, and people didn’t often step back and say “where is this storyline going?” Getting too caught up in the moment to check if the scene or gag moved the overall plot and themes along. They got so concerned about doing everything with a fresh new twist they never came back to points, never raised up old elements to say “look how far we’ve come” or “here is how that thing affected people and the plot.”

It’s funny, how something with so much scope can get hamstrung by all the fiddly little details.

#star wars #sass and murder show #thinky thoughts #writing is hard #story telling #rebels critical #sequels critical #aaron sorkin #greg weisman #no idea how coherent this is #but it's late and i wanted it done before bed because otherwise i'll never find this train of thought again

[basement-critics]

I watched "Well This Sucks" so you don't have to

• He opens with saying it's to late to make this video and that the internet is crazy

• Then goes into a pretty dope into graphic and song not gonna lie

• Talks about how he's been going through a lot online and he wants to talk about it

• Says the internet is bonkers and that outrage culture is insane and how he is sick of it *something I can agree with*

• Brings up the Johnny Depp, Amber Herd thing, and how the internet immediately canceled him without evidence

• Then brings up how Toby Turner was accused and the internet canceled him *even though there were several women who came out against him and filed reports*

• Says that it turns out Toby was innocent and his only proof was the video Toby made

• Says that YouTube promotes people who are negative and bad talk others in their videos and titles

• Says that you can pick any YouTuber who doesn't have a big following, "attack" them with things they did years and years ago and talk crap about them and get popular and views from it

*sounds like what you do with Shane huh Greg... minus the getting popular part*

• "I could do that, I could do that right now. I could pick any YouTuber I wanted, and I could put their name in the title, you know. And I could exploit the heck out of them. And maybe reboot my channel as this new, I hate everyone commentary YouTube channel, but I don't want to do that. And I don't want to do that because I don't want to kill myself"

*there isn't enough room for all the screenshots*

• Says he started YouTube for fun, and that it was a cool place when it started

•Messes with his hair and complains about it saying "this is what you get from a free hair cut"

• Talks more about outrage culture and how everyone is guilty until proven innocent *which again I can agree with*

• Brings up Johnny Depp again and says that often times those who accuse are the ones in the wrong

• "It's like people just want drama, and then don't actually care about truths about it. They just want to feel what way is relevant"

*again, like what you do to Shane*

• "We need to stop going with "if I feel it it's true" and start going with "if there is video or audio evidence then that's true".

*a statement I kind of agree with, but video and audio evidence can be tampered with*

• Claims the last 4 years of his life has consisted of seeing person after person after person hearing something and then assuming someone is guilty

• "I try to go off of what people actually say, like if someone says "hey guys I really like making out with goats" on audio"

• The claims we will take it out of context because that's what we always do to him, and that his Google search is full of things he has said taken out of context and that it's all for views

• Goes on about how he lost his train of thought and that's probably for the best because it had to do with making out with goats "and who wants to talk about that"

• We are all losers *not us, just everyone in general* because most everyone is a failure, because that's life

• He makes an analogy about actors and production companies and how a lot of them fail, and how you never see the same director again, it doesn't really apply to what he's talking about here

• Brings up that 8 out of 10 companies fail, so most people are failures

• Says he doesn't know how the video became a motivational video, but we all fail so we shouldn't feel that bad about it

• Talks about how he messed up his knee that day and that how he has new insurance and that his old insurance company was bad and that they canceled his plan without telling him

• Keeps telling the story of his new insurance company

• Brings up "Kai" again for no reason, like Lainey does nothing else in this story than stand there

• Claims that this insurance company made him say he believes the concept of God and the wellbeing of man before they would insure him

• Brings up the fan he harrassed over her pulling her pledge and him freaking out on her about it, saying she's trying to slander him and get his Patron taken down by releasing their dms

• Says that Repzion is bombing his Patron with hate and that there is a Twitter reporting his Patron for harrassment even though there isn't any harrassment on it

• It was apparently the girl who told him she thought his suicide jokes weren't funny and he told her to fuck off and kicked her pledge

• Says he only sends nice messages to his Patrons, ignoring the message he sent to the girl telling her her card didn't go through

• Claims she's trying to get him fired because Patron is his job, and that's outrage culture

• Outrage culture is trying to get him removed from a position he loves very much

• Says he hates 2018, 2019 and all of it

• Says that we used to live in a world where people used to be themselves

• Puts up a pic of Milo Yiannopoulos saying "The only appropriate response to outrage culture is to be outrageous" and Greg says "the best response to outrage culture it to be civil and prove them irrational, not act like a child"

*but Greg, you act like a child*

• Brings up Vic Migongna and Johnny Depp and how outrage culture tired to and almost did destroyed them

• Says that the Toby Turner thing was probably baseless

• Says men and women can be the same and both can be bad people

• Brings up that he knows people who have been violated by women

• Complains about his hair again

• Brings up the double standard when it comes to women being creepy

• Everyone has the potential to be creepy regardless of gender

• Says we as a society needs to stop being so sexist and stop thinking that women can never lie and that men can only lie or that women can never violate and men can only violate, and he shows a pic of Melanie Martinez

• Claims that we need to stop being so black and white

• Wants us to question everything and not take it all at face value

• Says that we need more thinkers in the world and less mindless sheep

• Says that we are trying to ruin his life because we are just going along with others

• Says that we got Uh Oh Bro got taken down because we bombarded YouTube with lies and YouTube believed us

• He wrote YouTube and told them we lied and YouTube agreed with him

• Says outrage culture is taking over justice

• Claims that their are peopl obsessed with triggering others *like that isn't you Greg*

• And there are people who are outraged by everything and making everything awful

• He wishes we would all realize we are in the real world even online

• Claims that a lot of us would get along with him irl even if we wanted to or not

• Subscribe to his Patron so he can buy PS4 games

• Claims outrage culture isn't going to like this, and then does a boob squeeze. And with this, the rest of my soul has died

#anti onision #onision #onison #greg jackson #long post #text post #im going to go eat mac and cheese now

[sk-salazar]

Here are my favorite things and some amazing observations about “Change Your Mind”. Needless to say, there are spoilers.

💖 Those cute rainbow caterpillar bois that Pink brought to Homeworld. And the image in my head of them chasing the Pearls. 😂 Someone needs to draw that.

💖 That DejaBlue pun.

💖 Connie standing up to Mama Blue and using her strict parents to her advantage.

💖 Steven standing up for his support of fusion instead of just giving Blue an empty apology.

💖 Blue realizing that she was wrong to use her emotional manipulation powers on her loved ones all these eons. And her comment about Homeworld failing Pink instead of Pink failing Homeworld. So many kids who defy the status quo need to hear this.

💖 Blue hiding the kids in her hair loop.

💖 The symbolism behind Steven throwing off his Pink Diamond getup and putting on his own clothes to confront White. (Maybe they’re just more comfortable, but I feel like there’s a clear message there.)

💖 Blue saying, “She prefers to be called Steven.” Even if she didn’t use a male pronoun, I can see a message here of accepting your trans kid and defending their chosen identify. Even if it causes a strain in your marriage.

💖 Connie’s courage (again!) to stand up to Yellow. Everyone kept blaming Connie for “blowing Steven’s chance to talk to White” because she fused with him. And Connie’s statement about changing the rules for everyone was the best clapback to that. Steven knows he’s right. Steven knows that servitude is wrong. He knows that denying who you want to be and not loving who you want to love is wrong. So if he is to confront White Diamond, he must do it on his terms, not hers.

💖 Yellow crying of her own volition.

💖 Connie’s “face-off” pun and all the hand puns about the ships. 😂 And Bismuth wanting to uppercut an upper crust. The writing for this episode was 🔥.

💖 Steven saying “GASP!” instead of actually gasping. 😂

💖 Lapis’ and Peridot’s new forms! I’m so in love with Lapis’ palazzo pants and golden sandals! She looks like she has so much more personality now. 💙💚

💖 Peridot saying, “Who needs thumbs?” even tho they’re the reason humans are an advanced species. 😂

💖 Steven’s observation about all his forms. Pink represented the “flight” response and Rose represented the “fight” response. Both of which are primitive responses to conflict. Meanwhile, Steven represents using logic and compassion to foster dialogue. He’s the most ascended form.

💖 Blue saying, “In order to fix [our family], we must admit that it’s broken.” Here, she voices the most common fear of those people who always push back against progress.

💖 Yellow telling Steven to #TakeAKnee . I see what you did there, Sugar Woman. 😏

💖 Yellow having the courage to tell White that “we need to talk about us”. (I love all the throwback references in this episode! One of which is this line, which is a throwback to the episode about Greg and Rose.)

💖 Steven telling White to “let us in your head” or to “get out of your head”. To be “in your head” means that you’re self-centered and unconcerned about the world around you. Again, that 🔥 writing.

💖 Amethyst’s owl pun. 😂

💖 Steven fusing with all the Crystal Gems to save them. Not only was it a great idea in an emergency, but it’s a great plot device. It gives us the answer to our questions about who all the Steven fusions are, thereby making it easier to wrap up the show sometime in the near future.

💖 The new fusions!!! Rainbow Quartz is a posh twink, Sunstone is a positive, 80’s rapper-esque cool dude role model for kids and Obsidian fucking Te Ka.

💖 Rainbow Quartz blowing a raspberry, Rainbow Quartz blasting off with a literal rainbow trail, Rainbow Quartz’s “two stones and one bird” joke. Just, Rainbow Quartz. 🌈

💖 The Crystal Gems forming a cheerleading pyramid to form Obsidian and Pearl doing a Swedish Alps move.

💖 That badass fucking shot of Obsidian’s multiple arms. As well as that epic music they played for her scene.

💖 The Crystal Gems’ new forms. Pearl has completely thrown off that flimsy veil thing that all Pearls have. (Which is a symbol of servitude to her.) And now, her outfit is a lot more conventionally human. (Maybe a sign that she wants to pursue Mystery Girl?) Also, the Star is on her back, representing her putting her past as a Crystal Gem behind her. Now, she’s just Pearl and she just wants to live her own chosen purpose.

Garnet has both red and blue in her corset. After Ruby and Sapphire spent time apart, Ruby realized that she liked being with Sapphire while still being herself. Maybe Sapphire came to the same conclusion. Maybe they both came to the conclusion that they’re not two halves of a whole. They’re two whole beings in one pair.

💖 Bismuth loving Connie enough to make her a custom non-Rose Quartz-themed sword. I love how much she loves and protects the new crew.

💖 The Great and Lovable Peridot declaring that she’s Homeworld’s savior.

💖 As unnerving as it is, I love the way White tries to mess with Steven’s head. She talks about Yellow’s, Blue’s and Pink’s impurities making them dependent on each other. (Essentially, colored diamonds are created because of impurities.) And also how Pink surrounds herself with outcasts in order to be considered normal or good. I don’t agree with any of her statements, but you’ll often hear bigots use the same kind of logic to justify their worldview, which really makes this show hit home in many ways. I have to admit, her words kind of messed with my head, too. For a moment, I had some intrusive thoughts, wondering if I believed what I believe so that I could be “the best of the worst”. I snapped out of it really quick, mind you. But this was an incredibly effective speech.

💖 Amethyst calling White a dirt wad. 😂 She has NO chill.

💖 Again, White Diamond being an absolute villain when she says, “Now I’ve removed all their flaws. Now they are perfect, now they are ME.” This could be an interpretation of God. He sees free will as a mistake because his creations choose NOT to glorify him and NOT to be molded in his image. So many awesome sneak-disses of real people in this episode. 😎👏🏼

💖 Yellow Pearl’s silly Pink Steven line turning out to be foreshadowing. 🤦🏻‍♀️

💖 The palpable representation of self-love in the form of Steven adoring his own form. Also, there’s a throwback to Rose Quartz saying, “Every time you love yourself or you love being yourself, that’s me loving you and loving being you.” Steven really is Pink’s ascended form. The song in the credits is from Pink to Steven.

💖 Rose Quartz and Pink being gone for good. So many stories have characters that come back to life and it seems like death loses meaning nowadays. As much as I love Rose, I’m here for her never coming back. Especially because that represents Pink/Rose/Steven growing and moving on. Just as we never go back to our old, naive selves, neither should Pink.

💖 Steven being equal to White in power, apparently. She was shook with that scream of his! And he took his sweet ass time walking towards his meat suit. That’s power right there.

💖 White saying, “I only want you to be yourself and if you can’t do that, I’ll do it for you.” A perfect representation of people nowadays forcing people to deny their true identities through draconian laws, unwritten social codes and bigoted statements.

(“You do not look like this, you do not sound like this, you are Pink Diamond” = “If you have a penis/vagina, you’re a man/woman.” “That gender doesn’t exist.” “Men and women are supposed to be with each other because...reproduction.” “You can live together, but don’t call it marriage.” Etc, etc.)

💖 The best line in the whole show: “I AM a child. What’s your excuse?” What a sweet, heartfelt way to remind us of the pilot episode, when all this magic got started. 😭

💖 White Diamond interpreted Pink’s “impurity” as warmth earlier. All this time, she thought that being “perfect” meant being detached, cold, unsympathetic, overbearing and cruel. But she becomes more likeable and multi-faceted when she absorbs Pink’s warmth/light. Without it, she’s a creepy, aloof puppet master. But with it, she becomes the same old White that the Diamonds loved. She changed quite easily, so that indicates to me that she felt the need to remove her emotions to become a more effective leader. (Kind of like how people with broken hearts often vow never to love again.) There should be a future exploration on this. Did she remove her own emotions? Did she do it in order to detach herself from grieving for Pink? Or did a higher, more eldritch power do this to her? 🤔 Either way, Pink’s warmth is the antidote to all forms of frigidity. For all that guff about her perfect white light penetrating everyone, she sure got shown a thing or two. 😁

💖 Apparently, Pink Pearl is okay-ish. She probably still has the trauma of being taken from Pink and having her eye cracked. But she apparently has no memory of being controlled. I was so tormented for the last month, wondering if poor Pink Pearl was screaming for freedom, trapped inside her own body. 😢

💖 Steven’s throwback to the song he sung to Lars and Sadie when they were stranded on the island. “If you let others just be whoever they are, maybe you could let yourself be whoever you are” is a throwback to “Let Yourself Just Be Wherever You Are”. It’s also a perfect message to people who rely on bigotry and forcefulness to serve as their whole identity.

💖 Sadie’s green hair. 💚 What a look! And Greg is such a good guy that he’s allowed Sadie and her band to play his song. ☺️ Also, her literal mic drop when the Diamond mothership lands above her. 🤣

💖 The way our perfect cinnamon roll always brings people together. The way he introduces the off-colors to the Diamonds like it’s NBD, like there hasn’t been eons of bad blood between them. And the way White is willing to say hello to them first. What a good grandma. ☺️ It’s funny that earlier on, White said that Pink inspires others to be their worst selves. Yet whenever Steven does stuff like this, it inspires me to be my best self. And many other fans too, I’m sure!

💖 Lars being kind to Lion. ☺️

💖 The off-colors and corrupted-now-uncorrupted Gems finally getting their happily ever after. ☺️

💖 Jasper still retaining a scar of her corruption. Because no one ever comes back unscathed and that little detail makes this story so much more real to us. Also, the way Amethyst explained everything to her, even after the way Jasper had bullied her.

💖 Yellow throwing up some deuces as the mothership was blasting off. 😂✌🏼 There is hope for these Diamonds after all.

💖 Steven’s closing song. What a perfect message to sum up the entire episode. 😍

#steven universe #pink diamond #pearl #rose quartz #amethyst #lapis lazuli #yellow diamond #blue diamond #peridot