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gurugirl · 9 months

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A Good Boy | 5. When In Greece

Summary: A family vacation to Greece is meant to be peaceful and relaxing but when Y/n is forced to confront Harry about her feelings everything is turned upside down.

Note: This is stepmon!reader x stepson!harry - both are adults in this story but don't read if you don't like it.

Word Count: 17,236

Warning: 18+ only, NSFW, smut, inappropriate & forbidden relationship, age gap, cheating, lying, angst

A Good Boy Masterlist

Y/n stumbled bleary-eyed to her car as she tried to catch her breath. She felt like she was in a cloud of red, full of stinging bees trudging through a telescoped tunnel of hopelessness. She’d never experienced that particular feeling before but she forced her brain to stop its thoughts and found a safe spot to release her tears and sobs into her leather steering wheel which was at the campus café parking lot just a half mile from Harry’s dorm. Not ideal but she was unable to hold her despair in for another moment when she pulled into an open space and shut the engine off.

When she finally hiccupped through her tears and numbness began to take over she dialed Marla.

“Where are you?” Marla knew the call was coming. And being the best friend anyone could ever ask for, anticipated needing to keep her day free for her friend.

“I’m at the campus café,” Y/n gasped and closed her eyes. A ridiculous woman. From the beginning of the affair to the end. A terrible, vile, and evil person. There was no redemption for her.

“Stay where you are. I’m coming to get you–“

“No. I’ll come over. I can–“

“No, you cannot. I will not let you drive while you’re crying and upset. We can get your car later. I don’t want you getting into an accident. Stay put. I’m already on my way.”

And for Harry? The moment he slammed the door shut behind her he fell to the floor on his hands and knees and let his salty tears pool under him onto the stupid cheap rug he bought to make his room look more “homey”. He wanted to rip the rug to shreds but he couldn’t manage to stand up and pull himself together, much less begin to shred woven cotton and polyester into bits out of anger.

He couldn’t begin to make sense of his emotions. The sadness and rage. He wouldn’t be getting over her for a long time. He knew it. He was devastated and the worst part was that she really did like him but she was trying to protect them both from further hurt. He would have learned to deal with it. He would have adapted to the rules. He just needed time. Just a little more time. He was still trying to get used to it.

It was hopeless. He knew all along that it couldn’t last. He just didn’t think it would be over so fast. He’d barely gotten over the thrill of having her for it to all suddenly be ripped away.

He didn’t hate her. Not even close. He was mad, yes, but he could never hate her. Everything that led up to her breaking up with him wasn’t her fault.

He blamed his father.

He blamed the arrangement, which he knew was his dad’s idea. He hated that it was Y/n that Leo wound up picking. She deserved love and affection and she needed it.

He swallowed the bile that rose up in his throat. His hangover was not helping matters. His muscles were stiff as he tried to sit back onto his shins. He was shaking from how he’d tensed his body and from the heartbreak and the tears and the grief.

When his phone chimed with a message his heart leaped and he crawled across the floor to snatch up his phone from his table quickly. But then when he saw it wasn’t Y/n, but rather Tyler letting him know he’d forgotten his wallet, he felt a sharp dejected anguish he knew he was going to have to get used to.

. . .

Y/n was in charge of selecting their ocean villa. It was a detached, private villa with a pool overlooking Agni Bay. They would be staying in Corfuand near where they could book private charters to islands and to surrounding beaches. She had booked some excursions and day trips for them but mostly they’d be lounging by the pool on the huge outdoor terrace.

She learned a few days prior that Harry was joining them and bringing Tyler. Leo had told her. It stung a bit that Harry hadn’t told her himself. But then again, it made sense. After breaking it off with him she hadn’t heard from him at all. She missed the daily texts and nightly calls. Missed his voice.

Two weeks without hearing from him at all had been difficult but she immersed herself in tennis club, booked extra sessions, found a nice murder mystery book series to read, and kept herself busy with the girls.

Marla was supportive and helpful. Cyndee and Gina still didn’t know anything but Cyndee did bring Harry up on their last Friday outing. Y/n wanted to strangle Cyndee for bringing it up at all because she was barely hanging on that evening as it was. But of course, Cyndee didn’t know better. She wasn’t in on the secret. Y/n wanted so badly to text Harry and just send him a quick I miss you message. But that wouldn’t help anything.

Leo went out of town for a couple of days for a conference upstate and so Y/n did her best to keep busy. Booking the vacation trip was actually fun. Cathartic even. She’d had the villa reserved far in advance but tacking on the little details felt really nice. Though she was nervous about the idea of Harry being there with them. Maybe it would be okay. Maybe it wouldn’t be a problem with him there. Perhaps things could go back to how they had been before everything happened.

She doubted it but hoped. Plus Tyler would be there to distract Harry. She would do her best to enjoy every minute of her vacation.

And as booked and busy as Y/n made herself during the day, the nights were not kind. When she was finally alone in her room in the dark with her thoughts she cried. She’d let her emotions pour out and soak her pillow. She’d cry in the shower and sit under the water for far longer than she should, being that water was such a scarce resource.

The worst part was that Leo had initiated sex the night after she broke up with Harry. It was awful. She told him she wasn’t feeling well so he backed off. But the following night he wanted her in his bed.

So she went to his bed and tried to perform. She tried to focus on the man she was with but it felt like betrayal. It felt bitter and nauseating. She couldn’t stay wet and she couldn’t finish. But of course, Leo did and once that was done she went back to her room and scrubbed her body until her skin was raw and her eyes were red with tears and her sinuses were clogged in that annoying way that you can’t even manage to clear them.

It had never happened to her before. Her feelings for Harry were much deeper than she allowed herself to realize. But on top of her own feelings for him was the worry that he was also hurting the way she was. She didn’t want to hurt him. She didn’t want him to feel this way.

But he did. He felt the same stabbing pain in his chest every time he thought of Y/n. He cried any time he was alone and he composed message after message to her but never sent them. He couldn’t get the lump out of his throat. He couldn’t eat much. He forced himself to have lunch midday with his friends during the week but it was torture pretending he was fine.

Tyler was worried about him. He checked on Harry every evening before quiet time in the dorm.

“Let’s go out this Friday. We’ll invite a bunch of friends. Let loose. No pressure for anything. Just some fun.”

Harry was indifferent. He didn’t care if he went out or stayed in. It was all the same. He was numb anytime he was with people so he knew he wouldn’t enjoy himself and if he stayed in by himself he’d just write a letter to her and cry and also wouldn’t enjoy himself. Nothing mattered.

The only thing that had him moving forward was his anger about the situation. He told his dad he was going to Greece with them, which he immediately regretted but then knew he couldn’t take back because Tyler was going and plans had been made. But part of him looked forward to going and seeing Y/n. Maybe… just maybe she’d change her mind. Maybe she’d want him again if she just saw him. Maybe he could convince her…

And the third week that had gone by since they’d seen each other was another blur for both of them. Harry was just going through the motions. Studying, school, forcing a smile, crying, sleeping… And for Y/n she was barely paying attention to anything that was happening during her busy days, never letting her mind wander too far from her current activity whatever that may have been. But her nights were clear and painful. She allowed herself to think of him and to cry and to feel.

Her girl’s night out was something she usually looked forward to but this time she was dreading it when Marla told her they’d be going to a new place. Leo hadn’t been home all day and Linda finished cleaning the house early and so Y/n was left alone for a big part of the day. It had been a mistake to assume she was going to relax and lay by the pool and read. She couldn’t focus. So instead she let herself think of Harry and wonder about him. The lounge chair she was on was the one that she and Harry had come to after their pool escapade.

Putting her hands on the fabric of the cushion she imagined that day so vividly. Then the girls came over and later that night they’d had sex in his room but Marla had overheard. She winced from the memory.

Everything reminded her of him. So she was feeling more like drinking a bottle of wine and smoking a joint and passing out rather than dancing the night away in a busy bar.

But, just like every other girl’s night out, Marla arrived in the Uber to pull Y/n out of her slump.

She hadn’t even bothered to wear makeup. She did put on a dress but it wasn’t anything that would draw attention. Her flat sandals were more cute than sexy. She hadn’t showered that day.

“Not to be rude, my love, but you do not look like you’re ready for a night out. We’re going to that new spot in Malibu. Remember?”

Y/n nodded, “Yeah. I remember. Maybe I shouldn’t go. I’m okay just to stay home,” she shrugged.

“Absolutely not. You’re coming with us. You need to get out of this big empty mansion and have some fun. Stop thinking about him. Just… come out and enjoy yourself the best you can. It’s better than wallowing here alone.” Marla was right of course.

The club in Malibu was a very popular spot. They’d never been because Malibu was a bit of a hike but they figured a change of scenery could be good (Marla suggested it).

Cyndee had gotten them in at a spot with a VIP table and bottle service. The table was in the middle of all the action. The room was dark with flashing lights and loud music and the ceiling opened up to the night sky. It was actually quite posh.

Lots of young pretty things were dancing and grinding together. The dance floor was packed. Y/n felt out of place. She normally dolled up but tonight, she looked more like an 8th grade math teacher.

“Please smile. You’re making me sad,” Marla whispered into her ear as they took their spot in the circular booth. Cyndee was dancing already and Gina was sitting at the table with a man who she knew from some social club she frequented. He just happened to be there at the club that night.

Gina introduced him, “This is Elias,” he stretched his hand out to shake Marla’s and then Y/n’s.

Elias was attractive and friendly. He was also really funny, which Y/n found refreshing. A good laugh. That’s what she’d needed.

She wasn’t in the mood to dance at all but Marla kept trying to convince her to let loose, “Come on! You’re gonna regret not dancing the night away. I think it’ll do you good!”

“Yeah! Come out and dance! I’ll go up with you too.” Elias smiled down at her and raised a brow.

She shook her head and sighed before slipping out of the booth and ambling to the dance floor.

And both Marla and Elias had been right. It was fun. It made her feel better. She almost forgot about Harry for a solid five-minute stretch.

She hadn’t had much to drink. She knew that the more alcohol she consumed the sadder she’d get and there would be a chance she’d wind up drunk texting Harry. She didn’t want to do anything to mess up any progress of moving on.

Elias was a terrible dancer so he fit right in with the girls. The DJ was playing some interesting music choices, some not so good to dance to but Y/n tried to ignore when the next song came on. In fact, it was so hard to transition from dancing and the beat at the end of the previous song to the next she gave up, “I’m going to grab a drink,” she spoke to Marla.

She needed a breath, despite the fact that the club was packed, getting off the dance floor cleared her mind up a bit.

The setup at the bar was very different from how it was at Murphy’s. It was in the shape of a large circle in the center of the room with neon lights that lit all the colorful bottles underneath.

Leaning her hip to the bar wall she tried to catch the eye of one of the bartenders. People all around were dancing slowly to the beat, couples smushed together enjoying the new pace of the song. The lyrics weren’t clear but Y/n knew it was something that had couples grinding together.

When she finally caught the eye of one of the bartenders she smiled and watched as they made their way toward her. But then suddenly her space was crowded by someone far taller and then she heard his voice, “Having fun?”

She thought she must be dreaming. Must be mistaken. Perhaps she’d had more alcohol than she realized. She rotated herself to look up and saw the light green eyes and soft strawberry lips of the man she’d been missing for nearly three weeks.

“Not really,” she replied honestly.

“What will you have?” The bartender interrupted their moment.

“Just a water for me, please,” Y/n nodded and smiled politely before Harry asked for a tequila. Neat.

Harry kept his eyes on Y/n. He could see she hadn’t worn makeup and hadn’t done anything with her hair at all. It made him feel the tiniest bit better to know she wasn’t trying to look sexy for anyone. Especially since she wasn’t with him.

“Who’s he?” He’d had enough tequila that he didn’t care if he sounded jealous. He was jealous. He didn’t like that she was out and dancing with some guy.

“I just met him tonight. A friend of Gina’s,” she shrugged and took in his appearance. Dark circles and stress lines between his eyes. Unshaven face. She felt like his appearance reflected her own sadness. “How are you doing, Harry?”

He scoffed and peeled his eyes from hers to look across the bar, “Just great.”

She nodded quietly and let her eyes drift off into a corner as she felt the weight of everything on her. The way this wasn’t fair. The way they were both hurt but there was nothing they could do about it.

When the bartender came back with their drinks Harry finally looked back down at her, “So you’re not drinking?” He took a quick sip from his own glass as he kept his eyes pinned to hers.

“I had a couple but I’m not trying to get drunk. It’s not wise probably.”

Harry tilted his head, “And why’s that?”

“Because alcohol kind of exasperates sad emotions. I don’t need to feel any sadder.” She spoke honestly. She didn’t need to tell him that. She could have just kept that to herself but he was being a bit cold with her, a bit standoffish and she didn’t like it. Her hope was that the confession would resonate and he’d lower his walls a bit. She wanted his warmth. Missed it.

He nodded and smirked as he looked over her head and lifted his glass upward gesturing to someone before looking back down at her, “Don’t be sad. You got exactly what you wanted.”

Suddenly he waved over at the bartender to get her attention again and Y/n figured it was best if she left. He was not budging with the attitude and she was beginning to feel her face heat up from frustration and grief, which soon would turn to her nose getting filled and tears breaking from her eyes. So she pushed herself off the bar and began to make her way through the packed floor back to her friends.

But she felt his hand wrap around the back of her arm before she could get too far and she felt the melancholy rise of undeserved hope sneak up her skin and to the back of her neck as she turned, “You did get what you wanted didn’t you? Tell me you got what you wanted.” He spoke into her ear as the song changed to something more up-tempo.

Shaking her head she scanned his face, “No. I didn’t get what I wanted. I got what I deserved.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means I didn’t deserve what I wanted, Harry.” She swallowed as he stared down at her, his face close to hers so he could hear.

“What did you want, Y/n?”

“That’s not fair. We can’t talk about this here.” She looked to her peripheral and back to him.

Harry’s eyes roamed her face as the bartender called out to him to pick up the second drink he ordered. He looked over his shoulder and then turned back to her, “I want to talk to you. Where can I find you?”

Y/n turned and jutted her chin toward the round booth her group was at, “Just there at that booth.”

She floated across the floor in a daze toward the table. She almost couldn’t believe it. What kind of luck was this? Los Angeles was massive. Knowing that Harry was at the same bar as she was, in Malibu of all places, seemed impossible. Highly highly unlikely. She settled into the booth opposite Cyndee and Gina and looked around the bar in search of Harry. She wasn’t sure where he’d gone off to or who he was with so she didn’t know where to look.

But after a few minutes, she saw him cut through the crowd toward her and behind him, not following, a young woman, Y/n recognized as Leslie. He was in the club with Leslie. She wondered if he’d perhaps been seeing her. That would be a good thing in regard to their situation. She didn’t like the idea but it would be good for him.

“That’s Harry!” Cyndee spoke loudly across the table, looking from Y/n to Harry as he neared the table.

Everything appeared to her in slow motion as he smiled and greeted the two ladies and then looked at Y/n as he leaned in to speak close, “Will you come with me? So we can talk?”

The hallway toward the bathrooms had tiny square mirrors all over the ceiling, walls, and floor. The music was still evident from the main room of the club but things were quieter once they’d passed the threshold into the hallway.

Y/n leaned into the cool wall behind her and crossed her arms as she looked up at Harry who stood in front of her, “Who’s the guy?”

“I told you, Harry. A friend of Gina’s. First time meeting him tonight.”

He nodded, “Seemed to be getting pretty friendly with him out there.”

“We were just dancing. Plus Marla was with us. Doesn’t matter anyway. What about Leslie? You’re here with her?”

“Here with a bunch of friends. And I asked Leslie to come. Yeah. Doubt you really care.”

His words were cold and very unlike how she’d been used to him behaving around her. But it was probably better this way. She shrugged, “I just want you to be happy. If you like her that’s good.”

Harry sighed, “So you gonna tell me what it is you wanted that you didn’t deserve?”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea to talk about that. I mean…” she dropped her arms to her sides and bunched the material of her dress nervously, “I think you know. You know how I feel, Harry.”

“See that’s what I’m confused about. The more I think about it the harder it is for me to wrap my mind around it. You said you broke up with me to spare me but I feel like the real reason is because it’s too hard. I think if you really liked me enough you’d have tried harder. You didn’t even give me a chance before you dropped me.”

“No. I saw how much it was affecting you. I can’t stand to hurt you so I needed to do it. Yes, part of it was because it’s hard. The situation was –“

“You hurt me the most by breaking it off,” he put a palm on the wall next to her head as he spoke, “Now I’m just angry. It didn’t make things better. And now what was the fucking point? You said you didn’t even get what you wanted. So why do it? Tell me what you really wanted. I just need to hear you say it, Y/n.”

She blinked her eyes as she looked into Harry’s. She was suddenly glad she hadn’t worn makeup because she was already feeling the beginning of the sting of tears behind her eyes, “You. But you know that.”

His features softened immediately. His berry lips parted as he wet them with his tongue and he brought his other palm up to the wall to narrow the space between them, “If you wanted me, you had me. You have me.”

She shook her head, “I don’t deserve you, though. That’s why this–“

“Fuck off with your bullshit. Like you’re some kind of martyr. You took everything from me. I just wanted to be with you. I wanted to be yours,” he kept his voice low but he spoke with heat and emotion, “I would have learned to be okay with it but you dropped me so fast I didn’t even have time to get used to it,” Harry pushed himself back and ran a hand through his hair.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to do. I still don’t. I have no idea what I’m doing at all. I feel evil. I feel like your feelings are far more important than mine,” she felt the first tear make a warm trail down her cheek and then as she blinked a second and third. “I’m sorry.”

Harry watched as she tried to hold back her emotion but he saw the tears on her face and he felt bad for his outburst but he was still so raw and angry from everything. “Please, don’t…” he softly brushed the back of his hand upward over her cheek to wipe her tears, “don’t cry. You’re gonna make me cry.”

She put her hand over his and closed her eyes, “I don’t want you to cry. You deserve to be happy, Harry.”

He shook his head and reached up to cup the other side of her face with his hand, “You don’t want me to cry? It’s all I’ve been doing. Every night for the past 19 days. I miss you, Y/n.”

She looked up at him, “I miss you too but you know we can’t… you deserve to be with someone you can have a real relationship with.”

Harry stepped in close and rested his forehead against hers, “Don’t want anyone but you.”

The world stopped and the only sound she could hear was her heart pumping in her chest. Having him so close to her was comforting and overwhelming all at the same time. It hurt but it felt good. She was confused. Maybe it had been a mistake to break up with him. Maybe that was the mistake.

“Harry?”

The pair separated quickly when they heard Leslie’s voice. Y/n’s face began to burn with embarrassment. She’d let it go too far. She hadn’t been in her right mind. Harry’s words and his eyes had her spinning and in a daze.

Leslie said something that Y/n couldn’t hear as her ears began to ring and regret blanketed her skin. She should never have allowed it to get that far. To let him touch her and stand so close… she knew better.

She looked between Harry and Leslie when Harry turned to whisper in her ear, “Will you come find me when you leave? I want to see you.”

Leslie’s face told Y/n everything she needed to know. Leslie was curious about what was going on. Suspicious. Leslie clearly liked Harry. And Harry could like Leslie too if it hadn’t been for Y/n.

Looking back at Harry she shook her head, “Harry… this can’t. No. We can’t.”

His hand wrapped around her wrist, “Yes, we can. Please don’t do this. Please, Y/n.”

“Leslie is right there, Harry. Go have fun with your friends. Pretend I’m not here.”

Harry stepped back and let go of her. He shook his head in disappointment, his eyes piercing into hers, “Fine.”

The way Leslie kept her eyes on Y/n until Harry pulled at her arm had Y/n feeling her guilt and shame bloom and swell.

She closed her eyes as Harry led Leslie out of the hallway and back into the main room of the club. It hurt too much to watch. She felt like she was back to day one when she broke up with him. She hoped that he’d begun to move on but he hadn’t. And neither had she.

“So what was that about?” Cyndee asked as Y/n slid back into the booth.

“He just had a question about our family vacation,” Y/n lied. She was glad the club was dark and the lights that illuminated could hide that she’d been crying. It was ridiculous. She was ridiculous.

Harry had effectively ruined her girl’s night out. Of course, it wasn’t totally his fault. He was in the same boat she was. And she tried not to let her eyes rove the features of the people dancing or standing at the periphery to perchance spot him again, but she couldn’t help it. She wanted to see him. Just another peek.

But Harry had moved so that she wouldn’t be able to lay her eyes on him, though he knew where she was and he continued to look toward the booth where she was sitting.

“Why do you keep looking over at your stepmom?” Leslie pulled him down so she could speak into his ear. He’d assured her that what she saw was just them talking and that it was loud so they had to stand that close. He said that Y/n had been upset about something. But Leslie wasn’t quite so sure. She’d seen his forehead pressed to hers. Had seen how he was cradling her face in his palms and how tense the moment was.

“Oh, didn’t realize I was. Just worried about her.”

And that was kind of the truth. He was worried about her. But not for reasons he could explain. Not to Leslie.

More alcohol. Shots, beer, martinis, dancing. A full hour had gone by. Y/n was on the dance floor again and trying to let the alcohol cover up her sadness but even in her state she couldn’t stop thinking about Harry. Especially when she’d finally caught sight of him on the dance floor. Especially when he was dancing with Leslie. Kissing Leslie. Hands on Leslie. Hips pressed to hers.

She swallowed down the jealousy the best she could. It was better to have Harry with someone his age. Someone who wasn’t his stepmom.

Marla danced with Y/n and kept asking if she was okay.

“I’m just trying to not think about it,” Y/n spoke into her friend’s ear as she watched Leslie’s hand sneak up the back of Harry’s shirt.

And it wasn’t that Harry wasn’t enjoying Leslie touching him and grinding against him. He thought Leslie was cute. He liked her. And in another world where he hadn’t gotten involved with Y/n, he’d be over the moon about where the night was leading. He’d already invited Leslie back to his dorm room, to which she enthusiastically said yes.

He was going to forget about Y/n the best he could. Do normal 21-year-old college guy shit and have sex with someone after a night out. He could see himself dating Leslie. Enjoying her company. And maybe he’d get over Y/n after enough time.

But it didn’t help that he couldn’t stop stealing glances at her. She was dancing near the other man. Not in a way that should have Harry feeling jealous but he couldn’t help that part. He was jealous. He didn’t think anyone should be near her. If he couldn’t have her then no one else should either.

“I’m right here, Harry,” Leslie put her arms up over his shoulders to pull his attention back to her. He didn’t know what he was doing. He was really trying to enjoy the girl he was dancing with and ignore the one he was not but it was almost impossible. He’d do almost anything to have the girl in his arms be Y/n rather than Leslie. To have Y/n’s hips glued to his, her eyes on him, her warm skin stuck against his…

When he looked at Y/n again and caught her gaze he caved. Maybe it was all the alcohol, or it was his jealousy, or his heart thinking for him rather than his brain but he put his hands over Leslie’s arms and moved her off of him, “I need to um...” he didn’t finish saying what he needed to do. But he knew it was a need. He had to convince Y/n of what he was already sure of himself.

Harry trudged through the sweaty bodies with his eyes on her and she watched him approach. His eyes were dark and his face set with a menacingly chilly expression.

He stood in front of her and pulled her in by her waist and she gasped, “What are you–“

“Dancing with my stepmom.” Harry began to sway and Y/n grasped onto his sturdy biceps, “Harry we can’t. Someone will see–“

“I don’t fucking care, Y/n,” He leaned in and spoke lowly into her ear, “Just listen. I want you. I don’t care if I’m just the side piece or whatever shit you want to call it. I fucking don’t care. Let it be messy. We’ll be together when my dad’s not around. I can give you what he can’t. Don’t punish yourself because you don’t think you deserve that. You do. We both do.”

She darted her eyes to Marla who was next to Harry before turning her head to respond to her stepson, “It doesn’t matter what we want. We can’t have that, Harry.”

His grip on her waist tightened, “We can and you know it. Unless you tell me you don’t want me. Tell me right now that you hated being with me and that you don’t miss me and I’ll leave you alone. Tell me all those things you told me about how you felt were just lies and I’ll never bother you again.”

She couldn’t help the way her body trembled as he spoke and the breath she let out bloomed over his neck. He knew she couldn’t deny it. He knew she wouldn’t take back what she said. And that was enough for him to feel like it wasn’t over.

“Harry…” she breathed his name as his thumbs dug into the material of her dress at her waist.

Suddenly it felt as if there was no one in the club except for them. She could feel his cheek against her temple, the whiskery bits scratching her skin. Their bodies moved together slowly as the next song came on.

When she felt his mouth move as he spoke she had been unable to stop the way her chest rose and fell deeply, pants leaving her mouth.

“You can’t because you need me just as much as I need you, Y/n. Fuck everyone else. I don’t care. Fuck my dad. Come home with me.”

And despite the pair forgetting about everyone around them, all their friends watched on as Y/n and Harry danced close, Harry's lips moving next to her ear, Y/n’s breaths deepening, her hands on his arms, his on her waist.

“Y/n,” Marla tapped her arm, and the sudden shock of being brought out of Harry’s spell was clear on her face when she looked from Harry to Marla. “We should get going. Okay?”

And that was it. He’d lost her again. She shook her head at Harry as she slipped out of his arms and pulled herself away from him and out of the club.

. . .

She had been thankful that Marla had come when she did. She was just about to give in. Just about to let the alcohol and Harry’s convincing words do all the thinking for her. She wanted to go with him. Wanted to just forget about it all. She wanted him. She could admit that. And part of her did need him. That was what was so hard. Because, yes, the sex was fun and she really loved it with Harry. But it had gone beyond sex. Their connection was deeper than just sex.

Waking up the next morning in her bed with Marla asleep next to her she felt crushed. Felt suffocated. She didn’t know how she was going to handle going on a vacation with him. Seeing him every day. She didn’t know if she was strong enough to stay away from him. Strong enough to keep denying herself or him.

She was in too deep and she knew that. She knew her feelings weren’t just physical. She knew it wasn’t just a phase. She knew that, to her, Harry was more than just a man she’d gotten involved with that she had begun to have some kind of attachment to.

It was more than that. And she knew it. But she just wasn’t ready to admit it to herself yet. Not aloud. Nor in her mind would she connect her thoughts and her feelings and recognize that one unmistakable emotion.

When they got back to Y/n’s house after that disaster of a girl’s night, Marla had given her a stern talking to. The truth. The reality.

“That was dumb, Y/n. Everyone watched you and Harry practically make out on the dance floor.”

“We didn’t kiss, Marla.”

“I know, but that was… very intimate. You might as well have had his tongue down your throat. He was talking with his lips on your ear and holding your body against his. It was obvious that it wasn’t just a friendly chat. And that girl he was with? Well, she saw it too and you should have seen the look on her face. Poor thing.”

Y/n knew that was what she deserved to hear. It was the truth and she had a moment of weakness. But Harry made her weak.

“I know. I’m just having a hard time not… I’m fucking so confused. I hate this.”

“You’ll feel better in the morning. Want me to stay the night? I’ll keep your phone away so you’re not drunk dialing him or something.”

And so that’s what happened. Marla was trying to help. She was a good friend. Y/n was thankful. But she also hated that she wasn’t waking up in Harry’s bed. Hated that she didn’t give in and that they couldn’t just be together. She wasn’t sure she’d ever get over him.

Harry’s stunt with Y/n had been the nail in the coffin with Leslie. She was planning on going back to his place. But after seeing the way he was behaving with Y/n, twice in one night was all she needed to see to know that there was something going on.

So he woke up in his bed alone thinking about Y/n. Thinking about how she didn’t deny the way she felt. But she still left him standing there like an idiot. He’d gone out on a limb and fucked up the sure thing he had with Leslie that night and wound up not getting any at all. His hope had soared and then crashed once again as he saw her look over her shoulder before stepping deeper into the crowd of people and out of sight.

. . .

The private villa Y/n selected was five bedrooms. Looking online at the photos of the property she hummed to herself as she imagined being dragged into Harry’s room and fucked against the door. He’d be angry with her for making them wait so long. He’d growl into her ear quietly about how she was his and how she needed him as he held his palm over her mouth to keep her quiet.

She swallowed and tried to push those dirty thoughts away. Leo was in his office as she was in her room imagining doing filthy things to his son. She couldn’t help it. Even though they hadn’t spoken since that night at the club she knew that they’d be seeing one another again soon. And that the private villa was spacious and there would be plenty of opportunity for them to have privacy.

For better or worse she couldn’t stop thinking about it and hoping they’d get the chance. She knew she shouldn’t think that way. But it was hard to stop those thoughts from taking over. Because she knew how he felt about her. She figured he’d try and convince her again and if it was just the two of them in a room with the door locked she wouldn’t say no. She wouldn’t be able to.

. . .

The airline lounge was quiet. There weren’t that many people to be seen at 5 am. Y/n sipped a latte and tried to distract herself by looking at her phone but she knew that Harry would show up soon with Tyler. She’d been unable to get much sleep the night before. Which was a shame because the flight with a layover was nearly a full day of travel.

They had a layover in Dublin and from there they’d fly into Corfu where they had ground transportation waiting to take them to their private villa on the ocean. She couldn’t wait to get to their destination.

“Harry texted. They just got through security,” Leo spoke suddenly.

Y/n nodded and looked back down at her phone, trying to act less affected than she was.

When Tyler and Harry arrived at the lounge they sat in a different area closer to the breakfast bar. Harry wore a baseball cap that covered his brown curls and he had his eyes closed until it was time to board their flight.

Y/n was glad that Harry and Tyler were not sitting near her and Leo on either flight. Traveling for nearly an entire day was already stressful enough. She didn’t need the extra tension of seeing Harry the entire time. She’d be getting enough of that in Greece.

. . .

The villa was even more gorgeous in person. The terrace was massive with lovely little lights attached to the outdoor canopies and was set on a hill that overlooked the ocean bay. The pool was huge and the property was totally private, surrounded by olive trees and plenty of land for them to explore if they chose. The interior of the villa was rustic but chic. The stone walls and floors with arched doorways and high ceilings with wooden beams were stunning. Every bedroom in the place had a view of the bay. It was literally quite breathtaking.

Leo and Y/n’s room was massive with a large window and terrace and hammocks swaying in the wind. Plants gave them some privacy but Y/n shuddered when she thought about that. She didn’t know how this vacation would go down. If Leo would want sex. He probably would. He was already relaxed and in quite high spirits she could tell.

Y/n was already in a cute bikini by the time Harry and Tyler had come outside to enjoy the terrace and pool and the view. She had her eyes closed, lying flat on her back on one of the lounge chairs.

But Harry wasn’t going to give her anything. He was going to act like he couldn’t care less about her presence or her body or what they’d gone through. If she could act so nonchalant about it so could he.

When Y/n heard the guys jump into the pool she sat up and glanced at Harry’s strong chest before turning her gaze away to watch the gorgeous view of the sea. It was difficult, though, to not let her eyes drag over his pecs and to his tattoos. His arms and his shoulders.

He looked happy. He was laughing with Tyler and seemed relaxed. And that was a good thing. Yes, it was better that he was happy rather than upset about the way things had ended.

Leo jumped into the pool with Harry and Tyler suddenly, the three of them laughing and enjoying the first official day of their vacation.

And Harry could tell that ignoring her was already working. He didn’t look at her but he could feel her eyes on him. He could tell she was trying not to look but failing.

“Thinking about going out tomorrow night. There’s a really nice bar in town. You’d be okay with that if just me and Tyler went?” Harry spoke to Leo but loud enough for Y/n to hear.

Y/n looked down into her lap and tried not to frown. Tried not to let her emotions take over her face. She didn’t know if this was payback or if Harry was actually trying to just move on. Or… perhaps it was just a ploy to make her needy of his usual attention.

“Of course! The driver can take you wherever you need to go and bring you back too. I expected that you and Tyler would want to go out and meet some girls or something.” Leo laughed.

Y/n pouted before blinking her eyes shut and trying to ignore the conversation. She didn’t want to even think about Harry meeting anyone. But what a selfish thing to consider. Her fantasies of Harry begging her to be with him or dragging her to his room slowly began to fade with the reality of the situation. She needed to let it go.

Bedtime came early. Everyone was exhausted from the long trip. Harry had still barely spared her a glance, though he did politely offer her the bottle of wine to refill her glass. But that was it. It was quite the blow to her ego. She figured that was what she deserved, though.

Tyler knocked at Harry’s cracked open door before stepping into his room, “You doing all that on purpose?” He gestured toward the door behind him.

“What do you mean?” Harry’s smirk gave away that he knew just what Tyler was talking about.

His friend cocked his head at Harry and rolled his eyes as he walked deeper into the room and sat on the edge of Harry’s bed, “What do you think I mean?”

Harry shrugged, “Just want to have some fun while I’m here on vacation. Trying not to think about Y/n or anything.”

“Dude you’re so full of shit. You had the chance to do that when we went out to the club but instead, you scared Leslie off for good trying to get with your stepmom in front of everyone.”

Harry shook his head, “Today’s a new day. She doesn’t want me so I’m just gonna have some fun.”

. . .

Y/n woke up before anyone else and made coffee. The place was beautiful. She couldn’t get over how bright and paradisiac the place was.

But even with how lovely the villa was… she tried not to pay much mind to the little voice in her head that told her Harry was doing it on purpose. That he was trying to make her jealous. Make her miss him. Make her eat her words about him finding someone his age to be with.

She’d gotten lucky that Leo was so tired the night before. He did kiss her goodnight, though. She rarely got that from him. But she knew he’d want something. He was in way too good of a mood the night before. She could tell he was going to want a roll in the sack soon.

She thought that with Harry and Tyler out that evening it would be a good time. It would be much easier to go along with it if Harry wasn’t nearby. She could pretend to be into it. Maybe he’d go down on her and she could pretend–“

“Up so early.” His raspy, deep morning voice was maybe her favorite sound. Ever. Her cheeks immediately warmed up at his voice coming from behind her, cutting her off from her thoughts.

She turned and watched as he walked around the large stone table to pour himself a cup of coffee.

“Yeah. I got to sleep right away and slept hard. Woke up and felt like I’d had enough rest.” She sipped her coffee as she watched Harry turn around with a mug, take three long-legged strides toward the table and sit down right next to her.

Without looking away from her he took a drink from his cup and Y/n continued to speak to fill in the awkward silence, “So, anyway. And you’re up early. Did you get enough rest?”

Harry smiled thoughtfully as he placed his mug down, “Sure. Slept pretty well. Fell asleep pretty quickly.”

He didn’t miss it when she mentioned that she got to sleep right away. To him, that meant that nothing happened between her and his dad the night before. Which of course he felt relieved by. He tried not to wonder when the last time they slept together was.

Y/n nodded, “Good. I think it’s so peaceful here too. Maybe that’s why we slept so well.” Her smile was genuine and her eyes told Harry she was taking all of him in. Soaking up his presence. Want. Longing.

Good.

“Well, I mean I’ve slept better before. Can think of a couple of times in particular. Ya know?” Harry raised his brows knowingly and licked his lips.

She softly nodded her head and the smallest smile broke out on her lips, “Yeah.” Memories of just how well they could sleep after the kind of intense sex they always seemed to have filled her thoughts.

Neither of them budged from their spot as they kept their eyes agaze on the other.

It was quiet and soft. She could stare into his eyes all day if she were allowed. She wanted to reach across the space to him and pull his shirt collar to bring him down for a kiss but she wouldn’t He wished she would.

Their moment was interrupted when they heard footsteps, quickly both taking their mugs in hand and sipping the hot liquid.

“Morning, early risers,” Leo yawned and stretched his arms overhead.

Tyler didn’t wake up until nearly noon. Y/n stayed most of the morning in a hammock by the pool reading while Harry sauntered around in only athletic shorts, baring his chest and abs. She was glad to have a book to read to distract her from the expanse of his skin littered with inky sketchings. The last thing she needed was to have Leo see her ogling his son.

After Harry and Tyler had left the big villa felt odd. It wasn’t that she hadn’t been used to being in such a large dwelling. Leonardo’s home was nearly as big. It was that the sudden weight of what she knew was coming felt paralyzing. She wasn’t going to be able to get out of this one she knew. Sure she could just say she didn’t want to have sex but that’s what she’d been doing far too frequently lately.

And just like she knew would happen, Leo was pulling her into his chest and trying to talk dirty to her. Two months ago it would have been welcomed.

“They’re gone for the night. What do you say we have a little fun?”

Y/n plastered a fake smile on her lips and drew her hands up over his shoulders, “What did you have in mind?”

“Haven’t felt you in a while. Missed you.” Leo pushed his mouth over hers and she closed her eyes and tried to shift her thoughts from the moment. Tried imagining she was doing anything else. Playing tennis with her trainer Margaret, swimming in the pool, shopping for new shoes…

But by the time they’d gotten into their bed, it was getting difficult to imagine that anything else was happening. So she switched tactics. It was Harry kissing her neck and pulling her clothes down and exposing her breaths. It was Harry whispering to her how pretty she was and what he wanted to do to her.

When he’d slid her panties off and he was bare between her legs she pushed herself up by her elbows and looked at his cock and gulped hard, but not out of lust or want. This wasn’t Harry and it was obvious. It was hard to trick herself that she was kissing Harry and touching his naked body when it wasn’t him. She didn’t want Leo. Not anymore. Not at all.

She blinked her eyes at him and grinned as she placed her palm over his dick before he could put on a condom, “Let me suck you off. Haven’t done that in a long time. And then you can come on my tits or something.” She figured a blow job didn’t feel as dirty as sex. Though choking on a cock was not fun when she wasn’t into it, it felt better than having sex with him, though.

And it wasn’t fun. Leo was well endowed and she had to work for him to come. He kept trying to pull her off so he could fuck her but she insisted that she wanted to get him off with her mouth.

She half regretted the route she’d taken. It probably would have been much faster if she’d just let him fuck her. He would have nutted in under ten minutes and she could fake an orgasm easily and that would be that. But instead, it took nearly double that for him to begin shaking with his release bursting down her throat before she pulled off of him and stroked him over her tits and tummy.

It was also no surprise to her that he didn’t even try to offer her anything once he was done. Which she was thankful for. This was one of those times she was relieved that he was a selfish lover.

. . .

Y/n startled awake when she heard Harry and Tyler stumble toward their rooms, with attempts to keep their voices down but failing quite miserably. It was just after 1 am. But when she heard the giggle of a female voice she sat up and strained her ears to listen closer.

Had they brought girls back with them?

She heard stomping and laughing then shushing before one door closed and then seconds later another. She considered going to stand outside of Harry’s door and pressing her ear to the wood to listen. But that was insane. He deserved privacy if he did bring a girl back. And that would be a good thing if he had (this seemed to be her mantra lately). A good thing for him to have some fun. With someone that wasn’t Y/n. That’s what she told herself anyway. In reality, it made her want to vomit.

She laid her head back onto the pillow and sighed. She closed her eyes and tried to let her mind think of anything but what might be happening in Harry’s room. She didn’t want to think about him joking around with another girl in that flirty confident way he does, taking her dress off, kissing the exposed parts of her skin as he lowered the fabric down over her hips. She couldn’t let herself imagine him with his soft raspberry lips doing things to some other girl that he’d done to her. And certainly, she refused to picture him having sex and coming on her tummy when they realized they forgot the condom because they were too caught up and horny.

She hated it. Hated the idea of any of that. Hated being jealous. Hated that she wasn’t being snuck into his room to do all of those things with him.

But the silence was a gift. She could hear nothing from their room and so she eventually convinced herself that she’d only imagined hearing a female’s voice, that there hadn’t been girls with them. And that thought was the only thing that helped her ease back into sleep.

. . .

When she finally woke up the following morning she had a feeling of dread and sadness in her tummy. Leo was already up as his side of the bed was empty.

She didn’t want to get up and walk into the kitchen and find two pretty girls sitting with coffee while Tyler sat next to one and Harry the other. Then it would be real. Because she had convinced herself that she’d only imagined hearing things the night before. But she knew what she heard. The distinct voice of a female, maybe two. She hoped she was wrong.

Freshening up her sleepy appearance first she put her messy hair into a ponytail and splashed her face with water. Her pajamas were cute. Little silky shorts and a tank top. It was her regular sleepwear. She had no idea what she was about to encounter but at least if she was going to see the young woman that got a taste of Harry the night before she could look somewhat cute.

But then she heard Leo’s voice. The window in the bathroom faced the balcony of their bedroom. She hadn’t seen him out on the balcony when she went into the bathroom so he must have been standing at the far corner away from where he could be spotted.

“I miss you, honey. I know…” his voice was quiet and soft. He never spoke to Y/n that way. He seemed so gentle with her. Sounded so malleable. So tender.

He chuckled breathily and spoke, “12 more days, Parker. Wish it was you here with me…”

She looked at herself in the mirror and shook her head. What had she gotten herself into? The man she was married to was clearly in love or falling in love with another woman. Y/n wasn’t upset that Leo was finding love with someone else. Y/n didn’t love Leo. But everything felt so fleeting suddenly. So finite. Things weren’t always as they seemed and now she was hyper-aware that the kind of agreement she had might be coming to an end.

She took a deep breath as she walked out of the bathroom, not needing to hear anything else from Leo to understand what was happening, and braced herself for what she might encounter in the kitchen.

But what she found when she got there was not quite what she’d imagined. There was indeed a young woman. Harry was seated at the table with his head drooped down and a mug of coffee in his hands while on the opposite side was Tyler sitting next to a sleepy girl. It was clear that the girl was with Tyler. Though, that didn’t mean there wasn’t another girl somewhere. Perhaps even still lying in Harry’s bed.

Harry appeared to be painfully hungover.

“Morning,” Y/n spoke as she eyed Tyler and the girl.

Everyone’s eyes were suddenly on Y/n.

Tyler cleared his throat, “This is Alex. We’re just waiting on the car to get here so she can go home.”

“So soon? You can stay for breakfast if you like,” Y/n smiled at the girl as she poured coffee for herself.

“Oh that is so kind of you but I have to be at work soon.”

Y/n glanced at Harry who couldn’t even force a smile onto his face. She wanted to ask if there was another girl in the house somewhere but based on Harry’s appearance she thought she knew the answer to that question.

Once Alex left Y/n tasked herself with making a big breakfast for everyone. Cooking made her happy and she figured if the guys were both hungover they’d want something to eat to soak up all the alcohol from the previous night. And also just the knowledge that Harry hadn’t brought a girl home, made everything in her own tummy settle and she was feeling quite peckish as well.

Y/n learned that Harry had gotten on a table and danced the macarena after housing some girl's martini. The girl was apparently into Harry but then he’d gotten quite trashed and that’s when Tyler suggested they head home. With Alex in tow of course.

“Shut up, dude,” Harry grumbled his words.

“Totally blew your shot with her man! And the funniest part of it was that she was so pissed that you drank her drink in one go. Like you just yanked it from her hand, gulped the whole thing down, and then climbed on the table and–“

Harry punched Tyler’s shoulder, “Shut. Up.”

After breakfast, Harry lay by the pool fully clothed. In fact, Y/n was quite sure he was wearing the same clothes as he had been the night before.

Y/n hated that this news made her happy. Hated that she felt smug that he’d gotten too drunk to bring a girl home. Hated that that idea improved her mood at all. But it did.

She was cleaning up the dishes and putting the leftovers away when Leo walked into the kitchen and clapped his hands together, “Today is a beach day. The boys can nurse their hangovers by the sea.”

Most of the morning had been wasted at the villa with Harry trying to recover and get his shit together before they could finally head to the bay.

The water was deep blue and the sky above was bright and clear. The beach had chairs with sun umbrellas all along the shore. They found a few chairs together and draped towels over them.

Harry seemed to be feeling better. Especially when two girls came up to greet him. It was clear they both were interested in Harry. Tyler was an attractive guy too, but Harry was… well he was Harry.

The girls were from Italy and spoke English perfectly. They were pretty with pretty hair, pretty skin, pretty lips, and pretty accents.

Watching Harry flirt sucked. She didn’t know any other way to feel about it. She tried to pretend she didn’t notice. But it was impossible being that they were only a few chairs away. She could hear everything too. The girls were giggling and Harry was being cheeky and cute, trying to say something to them in Italian and they ate it up, correcting his words and making him repeat but it seemed to only endear them to him even more.

Harry wore a pair of short green swim trunks that did little to hide his tight ass and strong thighs. Tattoos on full show, lean and well-muscled torso flaunted. Harry knew he was attractive. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that the girls introduced themselves to Harry and Tyler.

Y/n let her sun hat slip over her eyes as she laid back and tried to focus on the sound of the waves in the ocean and not the flirtatious laughter coming from Harry’s direction.

“Will you rub sunscreen on my back, Y/n? Feel like I didn’t get enough toward the shoulders,” Leo put his hand on Y/n’s arm to get her attention.

She scooted in behind Leo on his beach chair to reapply sunscreen to his back but with the angle she was at she had a better view of the boys.

Harry was draped casually on his chair. His smile drew deep dimples into his cheeks and the tiger tattoo on his thigh was being traced by the girl sitting next to him on his chair. They were no longer laughing but speaking quietly to one another.

She watched as the young woman pointed to his butterfly tattoo and Harry took her hand and urged her to put the pad of her finger along the lines of the ink.

Harry could tell Y/n was watching. He did feel a little bad. Just a little, though. Because he wasn’t interested in the pretty Italian girl with her hands on his skin, which was a bit rude of him. And he was reveling in the fact that Y/n might be getting jealous. Also rude of him.

But when he did finally allow his sight to take his stepmom in he noticed that his dad was rubbing lotion on her back and shoulders. He watched fingers graze along the side of her boobs and noted how his dad was grinning and whispering into Y/n’s ear.

Y/n was holding her hair to the side so it didn’t get sunscreen all over it and her other arm was out in front, palm flat on the chair between her legs so she was slightly bent at the waist. Her cleavage nearly spilled out of her yellow bikini top.

He didn’t like the way Leo was touching her or how Y/n was grinning at whatever was being said.

Harry took the girl's wrist and pulled her hand higher, now pressing her palm over the sparrow on his right pec.

“You work out a lot,” the girl spoke as she looked at Harry with her big brown eyes. She wanted more he could tell.

Harry turned his attention back to the girl fully and shook his head, “Just a few times a week. You obviously work out too.”

Y/n could pull the girl’s hair out. Her hands were on his pecs, feeling the firm muscle that Y/n enjoyed kissing and touching herself. But the worst was the way Harry was looking at the girl. His eyes dragged down her body as he spoke quietly to her. And when he pinched her thigh and she laughed loudly, hopping up from the chair, Harry followed after her and they ran playfully toward the water.

“Want a drink? I was thinking about bringing back some wine or something. There’s a shop just over there.” Leo spoke as Y/n stood up and moved back into her own chair.

“Yeah. Maybe some wine would be good.”

. . .

Leo had had a bit too much to drink. And Y/n hated, hated to think it, but it meant he’d pass out and would be unlikely to try anything with her. She could avoid sex with him. At least that evening.

It also meant, much to her devious delight, that Harry and Tyler had to bid adieu to the lovely young ladies, but not before getting some contact information so they could meet up later. Y/n needed their help to get Leo back to the villa in one piece.

Tyler was already setting up plans for that night to see Gia by the time they helped Leo to bed.

“Dude they’re both gonna be there tonight. Gia and Bambi.”

Yeah. The girl that Harry had been flirting with was named Bambi. Of course, that was her name. She was adorable with long legs and big brown eyes. She could pass for a Bambi.

“I don’t know, man. We just went out last night. I got so wasted and sick. Not sure I’m into it.”

“Really? Bambi was all over you. She wants to see you. You don’t have to drink, H. You know that right?” Tyler laughed.

Y/n was not purposely listening. She just happened to be in the kitchen wiping the countertops as the guys were in the sunroom connected to the kitchen. The fact that she could hear was totally a coincidence. Totally.

“Nah. You go. It’s fine.”

There was a pause for a beat and Y/n strained to hear if they were speaking. Whispering perhaps?

When Tyler responded his voice was much quieter so Y/n wiped her way toward the stone island in the center and perked her ears.

“It’s because of Y/n. Isn’t it? I know you’re still hung up on her but you gotta move on.”

“Tyler, I just don’t feel like going.”

“You’re not gonna be mad if I do then?”

Smiling to herself she moved away from the island and tossed the rag into the sink. Harry wasn’t going out to meet up with Bambi. She shouldn’t have been pleased with that but she was.

Tyler left after the sun had already gone down. Y/n hadn’t heard a single peep from Leo when she settled onto the terrace with a book and the yellow bikini she’d been wearing at the beach. Even at night, the weather in Corfu was warm.

Harry had been in the kitchen for a bit on his phone and then he disappeared for a while. She wished that things could be easy between them. Go back to how they were before.

But when he strutted out to the terrace and walked in front of her before splashing into the pool she was a little surprised that he’d come out with her at all. She thought perhaps he’d keep his distance. But of course, she knew better. She knew he wouldn’t.

And like they had been doing, mostly effectively since arriving in Greece, they ignored one another. Harry swam laps and Y/n read her mystery book and the stars twinkled down on their little paradise by the beach.

Y/n connected her cellphone to the speaker and put on music she had in her saved favorites. A random mix really.

Harry watched her walk across the stones to the outdoor mini fridge and pull out a bottle of beer before turning to Harry with a brow raised, “Want a beer?”

He nodded as he pulled himself out of the water and began to walk toward her. Droplets trickled down his skin and dripped from his trunks that were hung low on his hips.

She did well not to stare at his wet body as she handed him the cold bottle.

“Surprised you didn’t go out with Tyler. Seemed like you would have enjoyed seeing that girl tonight.” Y/n spoke as she sat down on the chair next to her book.

She immediately regretted asking. It made her look desperate, jealous. But perhaps she was.

Harry took the lounge next to hers and put his feet up as he took a swig from the bottle.

“Yeah. I would have enjoyed seeing her. She was really nice.”

“So why didn’t you? This is your vacation, Harry. You should enjoy it.”

Harry leaned his head back into the chair and turned to look at Y/n, “I am enjoying it. Maybe another night I’ll go out. Last night was too much for me.”

They sat silently for a bit as Y/n picked her book back up and tried to concentrate on the words on the page but her mind was racing.

When the next song came on, it had changed the mood entirely. A slow song and the lyrics were maybe somewhat ironic given their circumstance.

Harry stood from his chair and stretched his arms overhead before taking down the last of his beer.

“You done with yours?” He gestured toward her bottle.

“Oh. Yeah. Thanks, Harry.” She was about to pick up the bottle to hand to him but he reached across her and picked it up. Their faces coming within just inches. He’d done it on purpose. But she didn’t say anything as he straightened himself and took the bottles to the trash.

She looked back down at her book but the lyrics of the song and Harry’s fit body were far more interesting to her.

“You’re staring,” Harry spoke with a smile.

Y/n scoffed and rolled her eyes, “No. No, I’m not.” But she didn’t remove her eyes from his frame as she grinned.

Harry kept his gaze set on hers as he adjusted his swim trunks, plucking at the fabric near his crotch where the lining was irritating his skin. He’d done that on purpose too. A reminder to her of what she was missing out on.

She tried not to imagine him without the shorts. She knew what he looked like underneath.

Blinking her eyes she looked down at her lap and took a breath.

“So, Tyler’s having fun. He brought that girl back yesterday and now he’s out with another tonight. Quite the ladies' man,” Y/n tried changing the subject or at least the trajectory of where her mind was beginning to wander.

“Yeah, I guess so,” Harry shrugged as he plopped back down onto the chair and stretched his arms behind his head. “Kind of funny…” Harry chuckled, not finishing his thought.

Y/n turned to look at him, “What’s funny?”

Harry’s bright eyes binged on her exposed skin, “Cause I should be out with him. Bambi was cute. Coulda had fun. Yet here I am.”

Nodding she turned to face him, putting her feet onto the stone below the chair, “You should have gone. It would have been good. You can still go you know.” “Would it be? Is that what you want?” Harry mimicked her stance, turning himself and putting his feet onto the stone, their knees facing one another.

“What I want? What do you mean?”

Harry’s pink lips opened and then closed as he considered his words, “Want me to go out and have fun with someone else? Someone who’s not you?”

Y/n shook her head and looked away from his deep gaze. Of course, she didn’t want that. What she wanted wasn’t fair. Wasn’t right.

She stood up so she could pace. To put some distance between her and Harry because even though he was a couple of feet from her it was too close. But she didn’t get far when she felt his hand on her hip and he was standing over her, “That’s what you want?”

It wasn’t fair. Her feelings weren’t fair. The way he felt for her wasn’t fair. Nothing about their situation was fair.

She looked up at him and the slow riff of the new song made their proximity feel even more intense. It just wasn’t fair.

“Stop, Harry. You already know the answer.”

When his other hand landed on her hip and pulled her in so she couldn’t back away from him he nodded his head, “I do know the answer. That’s why I’m here. With you. Because we want the same thing. Don’t we?”

She dropped her eyes toward his chest, just about where his heart would be. The heart she longed to keep for herself. The most tender heart she’d ever known.

She nodded her answer but did not look up at him. Because it wasn’t fair. Her answer wasn’t fair. His feelings weren’t fair.

“See? You’re just torturing yourself, Y/n. Torturing me. I need you in a way I’ve never needed anything, and I know it’s the same for you. Please look at me.”

Harry didn’t know he could be so relentless about something. He was generally very easygoing and didn’t bother to push anyone in the way he did with Y/n. But it was different. Because he knew they had something special. Something rare.

Slowly she gave in and looked up at him again, bringing her hands up to his chest, palms flat. He looked down at her hands and then back up to her eyes, “Can you feel my heart?”

She nodded as Harry took one of his hands and pressed it over the back of hers to hold her palm in place. The unmistakable frenzied thudding of his muscular organ below vibrated against her skin, “It doesn’t do that with anyone else. Not like this.”

She didn’t want to cry. Didn’t want to let her feelings overwhelm her like they had been since she broke it off. Wanted to keep strong. Didn’t want to give in. Didn’t want to not give in.

“I know you feel the same way. Why are you doing this?”

She let out a shaky breath and blinked her eyes, “Because we can’t.”

“Y/n… I’m…” he shook his head and took a deep breath, “I need you to be honest. Because I can’t keep doing this to myself. I’m going crazy. Tell me you don’t want me.”

“That’s not fair.” Her words were a whisper.

“If you can’t tell me you don’t want me I’m never gonna be able to move on from you, Y/n.”

Harry brought his hands up to her face, not allowing her the chance to look away from him.

“I can’t.”

“Y/n… there’s not a single part of me that doesn’t want every single part of you. It’s only going to get worse. Tell me now you don’t want me. Before I kiss you.” His nose was pressed into her cheekbone as he closed his eyes. He could tell her breath was deepening. Her fingers softly stroked the skin and hair of his chest.

“Harry… please… don’t…” she couldn’t ever tell him she didn’t want him. She should tell him so that they could put an end to all of it. Tell him she never wanted him. Tell him it never meant anything to her. But how could she when that was the furthest thing from the truth? Her heart couldn’t let her speak those things aloud to him. Couldn’t utter those lies.

“Say it and I’ll stop. Say it, Y/n. Put me out of misery. Let me move on if you don’t want me. Say it and I’ll leave you alone for good.”

“It’s not that simple.”

Harry’s lips found the edge of Y/n’s mouth and his muttered words sent a shock through her soul, “Y/n, I love you.”

She gasped and pushed at him, her eyes wide as she shook her head, “No you don’t. Don’t say that!”

Pulling herself from his hold she turned and quickly walked back inside to get away. She needed to break down and cry and scream into a pillow and stomp her feet… anything to stop her veins from overflowing with him. Anything from stopping herself from responding to him in kind.

“Y/n!” Harry walked after her and followed her into the stairwell as she ascended as quickly as her legs would carry her. But Harry’s legs were longer and he was not letting her get away.

“Don’t run away from me, please!”

She pushed her way into a spare room and tried shoving the door closed but Harry’s strong body blocked the door as he forced his way in and closed it behind himself. The dark room was illuminated by the moon and the twinkle lights strung up over the terrace.

“Harry stop. You don’t mean it. You’re… you’re confused… it’s–“

His hands found her waist in the dark and he pulled her into his arms. He pressed his face into her hair, lips close to her ear, “I’m not confused. I’m in love with you.”

She had given in to her tears already. It was too much. Having his arms around her and his skin against hers, his voice, his words. I love you.

She melted into his arms and pressed her wet cheek against his chest as she cried.

Harry was gentle. His hands caressed her back as he allowed her to cry in his arms. He knew he was being bold by telling her how he really felt but he needed her to know. He wanted her to admit her feelings to him. She couldn’t say she didn’t want him because she did want him and he was sure she felt the exact same way for him that he did for her.

“Please, Y/n. If you can’t tell me you don’t want me I’m never gonna stop. I don’t care about the consequences. I don’t care if we get caught or if we keep it a secret forever. I just… I love you. I need you.”

Harry’s shorts were mostly dry by that point. Y/n felt the fabric against her hips as he tightened around her the slightest, his warm breath over her ear, “I love you.”

What was she supposed to do? How was she supposed to just push him away and ignore it all? It was already impossible, but now with his confession, she couldn’t do anything but let her heart crack open wide and allow him in. His warmth and kind heart smothered her resolve. Drowned it until it was gone.

“Goddamnit, Harry.” She spoke with her mouth smashed over his skin.

He put his hands on her face and turned her head up to look at him in the shadowy room, “I’m gonna kiss you. Tell me right now if you don’t want me to but I can’t go one more minute without it,” he whispered his words as he dipped down slowly.

Her silence was his answer and when his lips smoothed over hers their moans of acceptance meshed together with mouths moving in synch.

She had missed his kiss. His breath. His tongue.

When he felt her fingers glide into his curls he thought he might pass out. He didn’t know if this was only for the night or if it meant forever, or maybe just something in between. But it was clear she was his in that moment.

She could feel him under his shorts, thickening up quickly. And that flipped a switch in her right away. She’d been denying him of everything. He might have flirted with some girls during their break but he hadn’t been with anyone. He was hers. Every part of him belonged to her and how could she ever refuse him again? To deprive him of what he wanted, needed felt abusive. She never wanted to hurt him.

“I’m sorry, Harry…” she spoke against his lips as she pushed him toward the bed. Her legs were about to give out from the adrenaline rushing through her veins. She needed to be in his lap or lying next to him so they could be closer. She needed him closer. “I was wrong to break up with you.”

Harry gasped at her words and when he felt her pushing him toward the mattress he stepped back and pulled her with him, their lips never parting.

He hoisted her up over his body as he sat on the bed and slid himself into the center and up to the headboard keeping her with him as he went.

Y/n settled her thighs over his and kept her mouth on his, “I want you. I’ve always wanted you, Harry. I’m so sorry…”

His hands were shaky as he hugged her tight. He hoped this meant for good. He hoped she wouldn’t regret this again. He had never regretted it.

“You mean it?” Harry kissed her softly before parting from the kiss and putting his hands on her hips.

Y/n nodded and scratched his scalp gently, “I mean it. I’m not done with you. I could never be. I was wrong when I thought it would be better to be apart.”

“Promise me? You’re not gonna leave me again?”

Leaning forward she nudged her nose into his and brought her hands down to cup his face, “I promise you. Never again. It was stupid. I need you, Harry.”

The whine that left his throat when she rocked her hips down over him had blood rushing to her limbs and she pulled at him to move his back away from the headboard before pushing him flat to lie down, “You need me too, don’t you, baby? Need me to take care of you?” She rolled her hips over his bulge and he nodded and breathed out the word yes.

“Poor thing. I’ve been so bad to you. I’m gonna spend so much time making it up to you. I promise, Harry.”

“Please, Y/n.”

“Missed you, Harry. Missed this…” she pecked his lips and then kissed her way down his jaw, neck, his pecs, and sternum. Her mouth left small wet spots as she moved and whispered over his skin, “I’m sorry for all of it, baby.”

Harry arched his back when she licked her tongue along the ridges of his abs and he whimpered, “I need you. I need you now.”

She smiled and looked up at him. They both had tears in their eyes but things had shifted quickly. Instead of uncertainty and grief their hearts were reacting with love and devotion. Y/n would show him her devotion the best she could.

She put her palms on his pecs and sat up to look him over, “So pretty. So perfect for me, Harry. I was dumb to think I could suppress my feelings for you.”

Harry brought his hands up to her low back and smoothed his palms downward over her bottom. Her little bikini was flimsy and so it was easy for Harry’s thumbs to slip under the fabric so he could keep hold of her.

She needed the moment to take him in. There was just enough light to see his face and torso, to see his lips parted and his chest rising and falling.

“You know that I’m yours too, right? You’re the only one who has my heart, Harry.”

Harry let out a quivering breath as he squeezed her bottom and in a strained voice spoke barely above a whisper, “Say it again.”

Settling herself over his hips and leaning down to put her lips close to his ear and her palm over his heart she spoke, “I’m yours. I love you, Harry.”

The moment she whispered those words into his ears, Harry felt like his heart would give out, like his nervous system was going to shut down… his ears became muffled as blood rushed to his head and his heart pumped viciously in his chest. His breath caught in his throat and he began to melt and sink down into the mattress and through the floor into the cement foundation of the room below and then into the earth. But as long as he had her in his arms he was alive and in love. He was safe with her heart and her words.

She felt his grip tighten on her bottom but he said nothing as the moment had him spinning and sinking and soaring.

She kissed his soft lips and he suddenly jolted back into his body with a moan as he opened his mouth wide against hers. It was as if her lips were a defibrillator to his heart.

He bent his knees slightly and bucked up toward her, keeping his hands on her to hold her down. He wasn’t going to let her go.

She rocked her hips over him slowly as they kissed and licked wetly.

Harry’s dick was in an uncomfortable position in his trunks and the lining was scraping the skin as Y/n pressed her crotch over him. And as if she’d somehow read his mind, she pushed against his hands that were holding her bum and reached between them to push his shorts down and free his length from its confines.

When he sighed she cooed at him, “Feels better like that, doesn’t it? You’re too big to be smushed in there like that.”

Harry wanted to just thrust into her and fuck her from his spot on the mattress, holding her down and make her take him. He was desperate to feel her but he knew she was in charge. She was going to make it worth the wait. But he was shaky and leaking, “Y/n, please…” He didn’t even know exactly what he was asking for but he wanted anything.

“Yes, Harry. I know… Tell me what you need, baby. I just want to make you happy. Want you to feel so good.”

Harry pulled at the fabric of her bikini bottom and the hint was loud enough that she understood just what he wanted.

“Want these off? Yeah?” She kissed his mouth and gently brushed the crotch of her bikini bottoms over his cock.

Harry nodded and groaned, “Yes. Off…”

Y/n pushed herself up but Harry’s big hands wouldn’t let go of her bottom so she put her palms over the top of his hands and pried them off, “Need to let me go so I can get these off for you, baby. Will you let go?”

Harry whined but he did as she said.

Y/n got to her knees between his legs and first removed her top and then slowly slid her bottoms down her legs as Harry sat up and pushed his trunks the rest of the way off his body, but the moment she was completely bare he pulled her back into his chest, not wanting to have any space in between their bodies for a moment longer.

She giggled at the abrupt force of him pulling at her but then her mouth was covered by his, rendering her silent as he slowly moved his lips, savoring her taste and her skin on his.

The feel of her body draped over him, her hips and her bottom under his palms, her thighs spreading for him to have access to anything he wanted… Euphoria.

He reached down further, letting his digits glide down her bottom to the back of her thighs and then in toward her pussy that was pressed to his shaft. He let the pads of his fingers feel her soft skin over his hard erection, the tiny swivel of her hips to keep them connected was seductive.

She felt his fingers reaching behind her gently stroking her crease so she moved herself the slightest to feel the tip of his finger dip inside. The motion caused their lips to part and Harry let out a low moan.

Putting her hands on his chest she pushed herself up and sat over his finger making it reach deeper inside, “I want another Harry,” she panted as she rolled her hips onto his hand.

Harry groaned as he pulled his finger out and then thrust two inside of her. She was doing most of the work. He hardly had to move his fingers or hand at all with the way she was writhing over him.

“Missed your hands and your fingers so much, Harry.”

“I missed you, Y/n.”

She continued rocking into his hand, wetting his palm and making his fingers sticky with herself. Her clit was pressed to Harry’s frenulum giving him that decadent sensation of her pussy gliding over him gently that he missed so much.

Y/n reached around and pulled at his hand to bring his fingers out of her and she lifted his wrist toward his mouth, pushing his fingers onto his tongue, “That’s yours, baby.”

Harry closed his eyes at the taste as he felt her move down his body before wrapping her hand around his shaft.

She licked his tip and kissed the thick vein on the underside. Harry gasped and groaned and pushed himself up to reach for her, pulling her face upward so she would look at him, “Please, Y/n. I need to be inside of you so bad.”

Y/n grinned, grasping his wrist as she turned her face to kiss his palm, “Need to feel my pussy around you?”

Harry nodded as she climbed back over his body and smoothed her soaked cunt over his length, “Anything you want, baby.”

When she angled her hips over him and pushed down over his thick crown Harry let out a loud and guttural moan. Too loud.

And while Leo was probably still passed out, Y/n didn’t need to have this moment interrupted by anyone. She continued to sink over him as she put her palm over his mouth, “Shhh… this is just for you and me. Okay? Be a good boy and keep quiet so I can fuck you without anyone else hearing.”

It was nirvana to be connected with him again. To feel his thick tip being pushed inside her body, splitting her down the center in smooth strokes, nudging and gliding into her g-spot with each roll of her hips. And even with Y/n’s palm covering his mouth the sound of what was going on in the room was quite blatant. She was filthy wet over his cock, slick and sticky as she fucked herself down on him, pushing him into her guts. The bed started off with the smallest rattle from the metal frame and turned into a repetitive clunking thud on the floors as she rocked her hips over his harder. Even with their silence, the atmosphere in the room was sex and elation. They were finally together again and their bodies were celebrating the joy their hearts felt.

She was already chasing her own orgasm after only a handful of minutes of having him inside of her but she wanted to drag it out. Make it last. They had all night. And she didn’t care if Leo did wake and wonder where she was. Let him find them. Let him hear the squeak of the mattress and the wet sound of her pussy being fucked by his son. She was Harry’s. Only Harry’s.

Pulling her hand from his mouth she leaned over him, pressing her soft tits to his chest, and kissed him slowly as she fucked him. They were breathing in through their noses sharply to fill their lungs so they didn’t have to part their mouths.

Harry’s hands found her round bum again, squeezing and pressing her down while her hands wound through his curls.

Harry was leaking quite desperately and doing everything he could to hold back from filling her with his warm come. He wanted to feel her around him for as long as possible, “M’gonna come, hold on…” his breathy words were pinched as he spoke quickly.

Y/n paused and sat up, bringing his hands from her bottom to her tits, urging him to squeeze them, “S’okay, baby. It’s okay to come.”

Harry’s chest heaved as he shook his head and pressed his thumbs over her nipples, “Want it to last. Need to be here with you forever.”

Licking her lips and keening at the way he pinched her left nipple she nodded, “Me too. Want to feel like this with you forever. We’ll take our time and go slow. But if you come it’s okay. There’s so much time for us. I know you needed me,” she ran her fingers over his pecks and up to his neck gently as she felt him throb inside of her. He had been dangerously close to coming.

“Tell me again, Y/n. Want to make sure it was real.”

Letting her fingers travel up to his chin and to the side of his face she whispered his new favorite phrase to him, “I love you, Harry.”

He whimpered and she felt his cock twitch. That had nearly been his end again. Just her words and the moment they were in was almost too much for him.

“Fuck. Nearly came right then, Y/n.” He panted and tried to calm his cock as he closed his eyes with a big smile on his face.

“You deserve to come, baby. You’ve been so good.”

She began to slowly rock over him again, her clit pasted over his pelvis with the head of his thick cock pushed into her tummy, dragging against her cervix. He filled her up so perfectly, made her wobble and ache from the fullness his sizable cock gave her.

Her pussylips gripped him lavishly, slipping up and down and stimulating him from base to tip, coating him in her cream and wetting his lap. His fingers sunk into her soft skin with a pinch as she inched down and up in steady motions.

“Do you hear that?” She sheathed him with her cunt and lifted gently so the sound of their bodies connecting and slipping together could be heard, “It’s because I belong to you, Harry. No one gets me so wet and so achy.”

Harry choked out a quiet moan and listened to the noise of his cock being fucked by her wet pussy. He could barely respond with any coherent words except to whisper her name and whine when she seated herself fully onto him and clenched.

“And I can tell you’re mine too baby. You’re cock gets so hard for me. Can’t help it can you? Need my love and my attention. All of my affection. My cunt. We need each other, Harry.”

Quiet gasps and moist bodies meeting and parting slowly began to get louder, faster.

Y/n was going to come and she didn’t know if she could stop it from happening this time. She wanted to go all night but she was going to explode if she didn’t come.

“Baby… look at me…” she spoke quietly as Harry opened his eyes to take her in. Soft tits jiggling and, her mouth parted, “I’m gonna come. I want you to come with me. Okay?”

He nodded, “Fuck yes. Come on me, Y/n…” Harry gritted his teeth when he felt her begin to fuck down over him harder.

Harry bent his knees and began to plunge himself into her, meeting her thrusts with harsh smacks and splatting noises.

She could no longer hold in her ecstasy or her cries of bliss.

“I love you, Harry! Fuck! I’m coming!”

Harry coughed out a loud groan and gasped as her walls clamped and spasmed over him. His balls thudded into her, knocking her upward when he felt the relief of his come pouring out of his cock and spurting into her cunt.

As they writhed and came together they heard a thud from in the hallway.

They both heard the noise but they were in the throes of their orgasms, whining and moaning together in bliss with pounding hearts as they kept their eyes on one another.

It didn’t matter to either of them who it was or what the noise was. They’d deal with that when they were ready. At that moment they were alone in a room together, bodies interlinked, adjoined, shaking, panting, bursting. Nothing else mattered. No one else could come between them.

Collapsing onto his chest she ran her nails over his scalp and felt his hair between her fingers as she kissed his neck and sighed. Harry was still trembling with the smallest smile on his pink lips, breathing hard, his chest rising and falling with Y/n moving up and down with his breaths.

“I love you so much, Harry.”

He turned to his face to push his nose against hers, “I love you so fucking much it hurts. I still can’t believe this is real. Is it?” His arm moved around her waist as he held her tight.

“Yeah. I’m not going anywhere. I don’t know what I’m going to tell Leo but you and I will think of something. I don’t want you and your father to have a bad falling out.”

Harry kissed her soft lips and grinned, “You’re gonna leave him?”

“Yeah. I don’t want anyone but you. And it’ll make things easier for him and Parker anyway,” she chuckled quietly. It was true. She was convinced that Leo was not just fucking the girl, he was very much into her, if not in love. Based on what she’d overheard of their conversation she was confident that leaving him wouldn’t be difficult. It was the reason she was leaving him that would make things complicated.

Harry nuzzled his face into Y/n’s cheek and kissed her jaw, “I can’t believe you want to be with me. It feels like a dream.”

“It does.”

When they heard another thud and the sound of someone moving around down the hall they looked at one another, “Think it’s your dad?”

Harry shrugged and shook his head, “Maybe Tyler? He could be back by now. Don’t know.”

Y/n put her cheek over Harry’s chest and wrapped her arms around him as they both laid back down, “I don’t want to go out there. Not tonight. I just want to be here with you. Just you and me. We can think about what we want to do in the morning.”

Harry smiled and rubbed her naked back with his warm palm, “I don’t care if he knows tonight or tomorrow. I’ll wait until the time is right if you want. Maybe telling him while we’re on vacation is a bad idea.”

Y/n nodded and closed her eyes. She didn’t care anymore either. Now that she had him back again she wasn’t going to be letting go. Sure things would probably be difficult. She’d need to actually put her degree to use and get a job. She’d have to give up all the luxuries that being married to Leo afforded her. And she’d need to face the possibility that Harry would have a falling out with his father and that people wouldn’t be so kind toward her given the situation.

But she couldn’t imagine it not being worth it. Harry was worth all of it. There was no way she’d deny herself of him any longer. He was suffering and so was she. And why keep lying? She was in love. She was in deep. Harry had gotten ahold of her heart early on. There was nothing to be done but to yield to it.

Much to Harry’s chagrin, Y/n urged him to get up so they could clean up. They were sticky and gooey all over. It was absolutely necessary.

But of course, cleaning up was made slightly more difficult with a playful Harry. And of course, he was playful. He’d just learned that Y/n loved him just as much as he loved her. He realized that they had been on the same page the whole time. That she had missed him and how bad it hurt her. They were feeling the same things but now? She realized what he’d known all along. That they would be better together. No matter what.

Harry’s low, quiet baritone rang in Y/n’s ear as she giggled, “And how about this?” He dragged the rag over her clit as she pushed at his arm but he wasn’t budging.

“Harry! You’re just supposed to clean it,” she whisper-shouted as he watched where he was dragging the damp rag through her messy labia.

“I like it dirty, though, Y/n,” he laughed his words quietly as Y/n grasped the cloth and yanked it from him.

“You’re something else,” she grinned at him as she wiped herself up.

Harry had her perched on the bathroom counter and he was stood between her legs when they heard a knock at the bedroom door.

The bathroom they were in was connected to the bedroom and they’d kept the door open.

“Did you lock the bedroom door?”

Harry shook his head. Neither moved an inch when they heard the second knock.

“No matter what, are you with me?” Harry held onto the bottoms of her thighs to keep her in place.

“Yes, Harry. I’m with you, baby.” She nodded as they heard the bedroom door open.

Both Y/n and Harry were naked and only half wiped up after having sex. Staring at one another they listened as the footsteps drew closer to them.

And the scene was just as anyone could imagine. A pair of lovers pressed together, watching the door as the intruder cast eyes on the infidelity. A bare woman sat on a countertop with her thighs held up by a man in between her legs.

Harry held up a protective arm to shield her from the eyes that peered in.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Tyler laughed his words as he stepped forward enough that Harry and Y/n could see who it was.

Harry let out a breath and Y/n covered her face in embarrassment.

“Get the fuck out of here, dude!” Harry spoke quietly.

“I just came in here because Leo is awake and I’m pretty sure he heard you. I’ll be in my room if you need me.”

Y/n and Harry looked back at one another silently. Tyler said that he was pretty sure Leo had heard. But they wouldn’t know for sure until they faced him.

“Fuck.” Harry whispered, “I was hoping we could push this off until after vacation. What do we do?”

Y/n didn’t really know the answer. Ideally, they would have confronted Leo about this later on. Definitely not at the beginning of a two-week family vacation in Greece.

“We don’t know if he even heard anything. We can go out there now and get it out of the way. Or feel it out. See if he heard,” Y/n put her hands up to his chest.

Harry nodded and took a deep breath, “What if we just lock that door and get in bed together and wait until the morning?”

“We can do that too if you want. Maybe he has no idea and we can control when we tell him.”

The lovers smiled at one another in agreement before both leaning in to kiss. No matter what they were both on the same page now. There was no turning back.

“But if not. If he did hear we’ll figure it out. He doesn’t deserve you anyway, Y/n.”

Smiling up at him she realized that she was crazy but she was in love. And if anyone did deserve her it was Harry. The one who loved her. The one who was gentle with her. The one she loved.

“Yeah. We’ll figure it out together.”

This is the final part of this short series! Thank you for being here and reading!

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pensoterios · 2 months

Text

was thinking about Hazel soooo

enemies to lovers with Hazel Callahan, I guess. 2.7k words :)

Of course, you weren’t really enemies. How could you be? She was so nice, for no reason, always willing to help, which was disgustingly endearing, and she hadn't seemed to realize that you didn't want to be friends. You were a solitary person, an introvert, who rarely ever sought out other people. People often told you that you were intimidating, but you didn’t really understand why. That may have been part of why you hadn’t made many friends.

Of course, Hazel Callahan just could not have this, apparently. You rolled your eyes at the thought as you sat at your desk, paying no attention to Mr G’s very short class. You were very aware of Hazel in the desk behind you, trying to get your attention.

“Hey.” She whispered in your ear for the third time. You ignored her and the chill that ran down your body. When you didn’t respond, she tapped your shoulder. You rolled your eyes and finally turned around. “What?”`

Surprise dawned on her face at your tone, but she smiled and, voice low, asked, “Um, do you wanna join our club for female solidarity? It’s after school’s over, starts at 3:15 in the gym. I-I could email you about it, we’re learning about self-defense.” Your eyes were absolutely not watching her lips as she talked, and you huffed a sigh.

It actually didn’t sound terrible, but if Hazel was gonna be there, you weren’t planning on going. “I’m good.”

You turned back around in your seat before you could see her reaction, effectively ending the conversation.

After class, you overheard Hazel talking to her friends. “She said no, and I think she doesn’t like me. I guess it’s never gonna happen.” You heard Josie tell Hazel that you might warm up to her, and you scoffed to yourself. For once, Hazel was right, it was never going to happen. After what had happened during freshman year, you had ruled out ever being friends with her.

That day, you, a solitary, intimidated freshman, had heard some girls talking loudly about you right next to your locker, calling you a sad loser, and you looked around to see if anyone else had heard. Hazel, a few lockers down, was frowning at you, clearly having heard the girls. You looked away, embarrassed that a cute girl had heard them talking about you like that. The next day, Hazel came up to you and handed you a letter. You were surprised to see that Hazel had written you a note saying that those girls were completely wrong and you actually seemed cool. You began to smile for the first time in a while, but when you looked up, your heart dropped. Hazel was giggling, and it grew into laughter. Of course. It was a joke, there was no way someone like her would have any interest in you. You turned around to slam your locker, walking away with tears in your eyes. You rarely talked to Hazel after that, and anytime you did, you gave her the shortest, most contempt filled answers you could.

You had come a long way since then, joining the cheer team and even having a few girlfriends outside of school, but still remaining mostly solitary.

When the end of the day came, you found yourself lingering at school, wondering if you should go to that club. It had actually sounded interesting, though you didn’t really need self defense lessons as you had been taking them for years. However, female solidarity sounded interesting to you, even if you didn’t want to see Hazel more than you had to. Eventually, you decided to go, and that you would ignore Hazel as much as possible. You walked to the gym with just a few minutes to spare.You hated the way your eyes immediately found Hazel, and you ignored the way her face lit up when you walked in. You leaned against a wall, observing everything but her. The girls were standing in a circle that you decided to join. You were surprised to see Isabel and Brittany there, and as they waved at you, you smiled back. PJ stepped forward to start the session.

“Okay, losers!” Your eyebrows raised at her words. She continued, “today we’re continuing our self defense lessons.” Her eyes zeroed in on you. “Why don’t you go first? Let’s get that out of the way. Go against…” PJ smirked. “Hazel.”

What did she mean ‘go against Hazel’?

Hazel stepped into the circle, and you began to realize what was going on. Hazel only confirmed it when she smiled but put up her hands in fists. A wave of relief washed over you; you were good at this. You waited as Hazel stepped closer, throwing the first punch towards your face. You ducked and threw one back. It caught, landing just below her ribs. She stumbled backwards, the breath knocked out of her. The girls around you cheered. Not one to kick someone when they were down, unlike her, you kept your hands up, waiting for her to recover. She didn’t take long and scrambled towards you. This time you didn’t wait and went for her face. She dodged and threw a punch to your chest before you had retracted your arms. You clutched your chest where she had hit your sternum. It hurt like a bitch and you knew you’d have a bruise. You knew you had to get over it though so you put your hands back up and focused. Hazel stepped towards you and you anticipated her punch, grabbing her arm to use her momentum and knee her stomach. She grabbed onto you as she went down, pulling you down on top of her.

Nope. She was a terrible person and she was not hot. You looked down at her under you, with a weird smile on her face as you drew your hand back to hit her again. You faltered slightly at her expression and she caught your arm before it hit her. Damn it. With your concentration broken, she pushed up and pinned you to the floor, and why did she have to be so pretty? Sweaty and out of breath, she looked downright indecent while sitting on top of you, but you had to focus. You pushed at her shoulders, but she held your arms down. You decided to pull out the dirty tricks, waiting till she was close enough from holding you down to headbutt her as hard as you could, which you thought wasn’t that hard. Unfortunately for Hazel, it was pretty hard. “Fuck!” she yelled, scrambling off you while clutching her head. Everyone around you gasped. Your eyes widened as you witnessed her sit back, eyes squeezed shut and muttering curses under her breath.

Nope. No No. No. Her body absolutely did not feel nice under yours, and you were not enjoying this. Not at all. And still, a little voice in your head went, yes you are. You like it and you like her. Even after what she did.

Shit.

“Fuck, I- are you okay?”

Her eyes snapped open, finding you immediately. “Um, yeah- ah shit. Yeah I’m fine.” You frowned, “it doesn’t seem like it.” Hazel shook her head.

“I’m fine just a little- ow- just a little dizzy.” This was bad, you thought to yourself. You hadn’t meant to give her a concussion, and you held out two fingers. “Shit, Hazel how many fingers am I holding up?” you asked.

“I don’t know, like, 4?” Yup. Definite concussion. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry,” you gasped. PJ called from the circle, “is she good?”

You shook your head, finally taking your eyes off Hazel. “She has a concussion. I have to take her to the nurse, or something.” PJ shrugged, “fine, whatever.” You rolled your eyes and turned back to Hazel. “Come on, let’s go.”

Hazel shook her head again. “I’m fine, just- ah- gimme a second.” You sighed. “You have a concussion. You should not be here. You should be somewhere where you can rest your head.” You pulled her up, keeping her steady as she leaned on you. “Alright, alright,” she conceded. “Don’t be mean to me.” You rolled your eyes at her childish remark. “I’m not being mean,” you insisted as you led her out of the gym. “You’re just stubborn, so excuse me if I’m like… concerned for your health.”

Hazel hummed but didn’t say anything as you walked towards the nurse’s office. There was a silence, not uncomfortable, as you walked and eventually reached the nurse’s office. The school nurse had already gone home, but of course, being in self defense classes meant you knew your fair share of first-aid. As Hazel watched, seated in a chair, you went to the freezer, grabbing ice cubes and putting them in a plastic bag. You handed the bag to Hazel. “Put this on your ribs, and lay down on one of the beds.” You gestured to the two medical beds in the office. Hazel listened, surprisingly, and laid down on the closest one. You sat in the chair next to it, watching quietly.

“What about your, um… your chest?” asked Hazel, blushing through talking about your chest.. You had forgotten all about your injuries for a moment, but as soon as Hazel mentioned it, your sternum began to throb. “Yeah. Right.” You nodded and got up again to get more ice, holding it to your chest and sitting heavily in the chair. You could feel Hazel’s eyes on you, watching as you slumped in the chair.

“What?” You turned suddenly, catching her staring. Her cheeks started warming and she looked away. “Nothing, I just- you’re really pretty.”

You rolled your eyes. “I look like shit, Hazel.” Hazel shrugged. “So?” You shook your head. “So. how could I be pretty if I look like shit?”

Hazel frowned. “Well, it’s not like a right-now thing, I mean, you’re always pretty, whether you look like shit or not.”

You looked at her out of the corner of your eye. You’d blame it on the concussion, you decided. She wasn’t thinking properly. “Yeah, okay. Whatever you say.”

Hazel was not having that. “No, actually. Like, you are actually really beautiful.” You hated the way your heart fluttered at the earnesty in her compliment. You knew you were pretty, but it was always nice to hear. Hazel looked away. “Sometimes I just look at you and go: ‘wow, I wish I could tell her how pretty she is every day. Maybe after a kiss on the cheek.’”

She what?

The shock from her comment got to you. “You what? So what was that in freshman year? You don’t get to just say that after what you did.” Hazel frowned again. You didn’t like that face, in fact, you much preferred her smile. “What do you mean?”

“Oh come on, you’re telling me you don’t remember when you wrote that fake note and then laughed in my face about it?”

Her eyebrows pinched further together in obvious confusion. “Fake note? What fake-” Realization dawned on her face, her eyes wide, which quickly turned into hurt. Her voice was quiet. “You thought it was fake?”

You looked at her like she was crazy. “Are you trying to tell me it was real? Hazel, you laughed in my face about it. Why wouldn’t I think that?” Hazel shook her head. “No, no, I didn’t. I just got nervous and when I get nervous I do this like, giggle thing.” Her eyes widen. “Oh my god, that’s why you walked away? You thought I was laughing at you. Holy shit, I feel terrible now. That explains so much- no, I meant every word I wrote on that paper.” Your eyes went wide as hope surged in your chest.

“Hazel, you… you meant it?”

She nodded. “Of course I did, I’d never not mean it. That would be horrible. Do you.. Still hate me?” You grimaced. “I don’t think I ever did.. I was just hurt cause I thought I’d been absolutely rejected by the girl of my dreams.” At her frown, you clarify. “You, Hazel.”

Hazel’s jaw drops, and she sits up, ignoring the way the room spins for a second. “I’m the girl of your dreams? Really?” Her wide eyes draw you in closer, leaning in as your eyes drop to her pretty pink lips. “Yeah, you are. Is this okay?” You ask as you lean even closer.

She nods her head, but before you can even move, the door to the nurse’s office swings open. You both lean back quickly as PJ appears in the door, but too late as her eyes flick from you to Hazel and back. “What are you losers doing in here? Making out?”

Both you and Hazel blush and PJ finally realizes that she’s right. “Oh, you were actually about to make out? Well don’t stop on my account-”

“Shut up, PJ,” you say, rolling your eyes. She rolls her eyes back at you. “Whatever. Club’s over anyway.” She shrugs, but both you and Hazel frown. “PJ, that’s really short. What happened?” Hazel asks. PJ shrugs again. “We had like, two more fights after you guys left, but the mood was totally killed so it got boring. Plus, Brittany had to leave.”

You and Hazel shared a look. You were both friends with PJ, so you both knew she was only in it for Brittany. “Okay, well, I gotta go. Hazel, if you want a ride, me and Josie are leaving, like, now.” Hazel swung her legs off the bed, standing a little shakily.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” You ask, reaching out to steady her as you all walk out of the nurse’s office. She opens her mouth but PJ interrupts. “She’s fine, chill. Come on, let’s go.” You all walk back to the gym to get your stuff, then you part ways.

Hazel smiles sheepishly at you before they leave. “Thanks for taking care of me. See you tomorrow.”

“See you,” you respond, and you can’t help the disappointment in your voice. You wish PJ hadn’t interrupted, seeing as you’d definitely be kissing Hazel right now if she hadn’t, instead of watching her leave. You would see her tomorrow, but who knew if you’d have a moment like that again?

There wasn’t anything you could do about it now, but as you walked to your car, you made a promise to pull Hazel aside after school tomorrow and kiss the life out of her.

That self-promise proved to be challenging, since you had to see her all day before you’d talk to her privately. Sitting in Mr. G’s class was torture since you were hyper aware of Hazel sitting behind you, just out of reach.

Finally when the end of the day arrived and the bell rang, you rushed to your locker to find Hazel. You found her leaning against her own locker, and she looked up when you approached, her face brightening. “Hi,” she breathed out, a smile taking over her face to mirror the one on yours.

Your brain nearly shut off at her smile, but you quickly shook it off. The plan you had formulated in your mind rearranged itself as she leaned against the locker. You came closer and closer, putting a hand on the lockers next to her head to support yourself as you leaned in, your lips inches from hers. “Hi gorgeous. Can I kiss you?” You didn’t care about the other people in the hallway. All that mattered was Hazel’s little nervous swallow and the nod she gave you. Immediately, your lips were on hers, slotting together as you kissed her sweetly. You felt her hand go up and touch your cheek, holding you in place as you continued to kiss her.

When you finally pulled away, you were both slightly out of breath, your lips and cheeks flushed. You smiled at each other.

“It’s fitting,” you say, smiling now. “What is?” she asks.

“We kind of just corrected what happened here last time,” you laughed softly, leaning in for another kiss. Hazel smiled against your lips, kissing you back with passion. She pulled back to speak, her lips brushing against yours. “You want to get out of here?”

You smiled. “Hell yeah.”

#hazel callahan x reader #hazel callahan #bottoms 2023 #what even is this #i tried

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underoossss · 7 months

Text

Driving Lessons — S.H

pairing: steve harrington x f!reader

warnings: none

masterlist

an: hi everyone! here’s a new fluffy fic for you. best friends to lovers goodness to brighten your weekend. I dedicate this to everyone who like me was terrified when they learned how to drive and those who don’t drive bc it’s scary af. steve is just so sweet and perfect and I think he’d be a wonderful teacher specially if he has a crush on you. I hope you enjoy! Pls let me know if you liked this!

The doorbell rings just as you finish getting ready. It’s a sunny summer morning and you decided to fight off the heat with a white dress with tiny pink roses printed on it, a denim vest and converse. You check the clock by your bed and as always Steve is right on time.

You’d woken up with a start this morning from a terrible nightmare you don’t want to think about. Steve had an angry wound on the side of his abdomen and was in no state to drive. He needed your help, but you don’t know how to drive, so you were helpless to do anything else but to press his own t-shirt against the wound. The same desperation haunted you all through breakfast and gave you the push you needed to face your fears. Driving. You’re going to learn, no matter how much panic it causes you.

That’s why Steve is here, you called him earlier and agreed to meet here at noon. And punctual as ever, he’s already waiting on the porch. You heart drums loudly inside your chest, excited to see your friend, your best friend, and object of all your affection. Though no one needs to know the last part.

You open the door, and the pitter patter of your heart gets out of control no matter how much you try to remind it that he’s your friend. Nothing more. Steve looks sun kissed by the summer sun and beautiful as always, with various freckles standing out across his face. Broad shoulders in a white t-shirt and light washed jeans that fit him just right, his old Cortez shoes and usual brown watch. You hate him, and you love him so much.

“Hi Stevie.” Your smile breaks free as you greet him with a hug.

“Hey you.” Steve’s smile is clear in his voice as his arms go around you. It’s a tight hug and soon enough, he’s lifting you off the ground and spinning you around.

You laugh as he sets you down on the ground. “Someone’s happy.”

“How can I not be? I’m spending the day with you.” Steve smiles brightly, “What’s this you have to ask me? Got me nervous all the way here.”

You shake your head; how can you not be crazy about him when he’s so damn sweet with you. You decide to tackle his question instead. “Why would you be nervous?”

“I wasn’t sure if we need to hide a dead body.” He shrugs.

“Not today.” You play along with a fake frown and smile when it makes Steve laugh. A moment later you turn shy under his gaze when it lingers on your face. “Okay I called you because I need you to teach me how to drive. Please.”

“How to drive?” Steve’s eyebrows shoot up towards his forehead as his brown eyes widen. “You got tired of me already sweetheart?”

You roll your eyes, ignoring the nickname, and hit his shoulder softly; Steve takes that same wrist and holds on to swing your hands between you. It endears you and makes you love him a little bit more, it’s only noon. “You hurt me.” He says all drama as always.

“No, Stevie.” You tilt your head towards your shoulder, choosing not to tell him about last night’s nightmare. “I just want to learn in case there’s an emergency or something.” When Steve’s eyes soften, you look away.

“Okay,” He says quietly, then tucks a rogue strand of hair behind your ear. “Do you want to start right now?” Steve asks you, completely unaware of the fact that you’ve stopped breathing.

“God, no. I’m scared.” You shake your head, trying to ignore the way your heart hurts at his soft gesture. “I was going to suggest ice cream first.”

Steve smiles and wraps an arm around your shoulder pulling you to his side as he leads both of you to his parked car in the driveway. “Alright, ice cream first. You look beautiful by the way.”

You lean your head on his shoulder and shake his head. “Is this you trying to get me to pay?”

Steve only laughs and rolls his eyes.

“First things first, seat belt.” Steve glances behind you with a nod of his head. The two of you are sitting in his car, but while he’s always in the drivers seat, he’s the passenger today.

You turn around and bring the seat belt across your torso before it clicks into place once fastened. “Okay.”

Steve scratches his chin and you watch for only a second before looking ahead, no distractions. “Now, adjust the mirrors; you should see everything with the rear view mirror and the front door’s handle with your other two. I’ll move this one for you.” He reaches out of the car and brings it forward a tiny bit until you nod.

“Alright that’s good.” You do the same with the one on your right before wiping your hands on your dress. You take a shaky breath and look back at Steve. “Now what?”

Steve’s grinning when you meet his eyes and shakes his head briefly. He nods towards the keys hanging from the ignition switch. “Now you turn on the car.”

Panic bubbles deep in your stomach but you nod anyway, pushing through the many anxious thoughts in your head. This is why you never made it past a single lesson during driver’s ed, your fear. What if you crash the car, hurt someone, hurt Steve? You’re grateful that your hand doesn’t shake when it turns the key, bringing the car to life.

“Hey,” Steve says, and you look over at him to find him smiling at you. “You’re doing great.”

“Thank you, Stevie.” You swallow down the rising panic inside your chest as you look at the steering wheel. At least Steve’s car isn’t mechanic. Steve points at the pedals by your feet which makes you focus again.

“Right one’s accelerator, and the left one’s the break.” Steve explains. “The car’s in park now so it won't move even if you hit the gas.” He looks up at you to make sure you’re okay to go on and you give him a half nod. “If you break and change the gear to Drive, then it’ll move.”

“What?” You ask him when he glances at you expectantly.

Steve motions to the gear stick behind the wheel with his head. It’s time, you guess and swallow hard, pressing down the break pedal and shifting the car to drive. You can feel your heart pounding in your ears, and your hands break a sweat. Trying to push through though, you take your foot off the breaks and accelerate slowly, but it only seems to make your panic worse. The car only moves about 8 feet before you stop and put it back on Park, shutting your eyes tightly. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.

Steve reaches over and shuts down the engine before turning towards you. “Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” He asks you softly, a hand on your shoulder. It rubs down your arm gently and grabs one of your hands from the steering wheel. “Talk to me, what happened?”

“I’m sorry I panicked.” You confess, keeping your eyes shut. “This is scary.”

“Okay.” You open your eyes to see Steve nod, gaze full of concern as it meets yours. “Want to tell me what scares you?”

Taking your seat belt off you turn towards him and rest your forehead on his shoulder. “Stevie, what if I crash your car and we both end up hurt.”

You feel Steve take a deep breath and his hand let go of yours in favour of running up and down your back. “That won’t happen.”

“You don’t know that.” You mumble with a shake of his head.

“I do.” Steve counters, pushing on your shoulder gently to look into your eyes. “We’re only going to turn right and drive to the dead end, nothing crazy. No cars will hit you, babe, you know it’s a quiet road.”

You look out the windshield towards the road in question. No one ever drives by, just the three homeowners who live in the dead end, but they’ve already left for the day. If that’s the only practice you’ll have today, you think you can manage to keep your fear in check.

“There we go.” Steve smiles triumphantly when you nod in determination. “Ready?”

“Yes.” You click your seat belt into place and turn on the car.

Just as Steve promised, you only go back and forth from your house to the dead end. He’s patient and gentle as he gives various instructions, when to break and when to accelerate. He guides you through the u-turn and how to back up when you mess up said u-turn. The initial paralyzing dread fades to manageable nerves as 45 minutes go by, and smile when Steve gives you a knowing look.

“Feeling more confident?” He asks as you park in your driveway once more.

“Yeah, a bit.” You let out a deep breath and nod. “I know I’m safe if I’m with you, Steve.”

“You are.” Steve mirrors your nod and clears his throat, then motions towards his door. “Come on, let’s switch. We’re renting a movie so you can relax.”

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

“Stevie, it’s so early.” You mumble, opening your front door at 6am on a Saturday. You look up at him, he looks just as sleepy as you but handsome as always. His hair is a mess of chocolate waves, and the light blue polo he wears with his jeans looks great on him. An outfit so basic shouldn’t look so good; it’s his shoulders you think, they make those damn polos look gorgeous on him.

“Well, you’re the one scared of driving.” Steve’s voice brings you back to the present. “If we go right now, the streets will be all yours. It’ll help with your nerves.”

“I’m sure, it’s the crack of dawn during summer after all.” You joke, sleepiness slowly leaving your body. A smile takes over your face at Steve’s sheepish expression and you can’t help but lean in for a hug. “Thank you, Stevie.”

“You know, people aren’t supposed to look so pretty at 6am.” Steve says, stepping back and meeting your eyes. You heart drops to your stomach for a moment at his words and you look down at your clothes. Black denim shorts, converse, and a sweatshirt.

“You really need some glasses, Steve.” You chuckle, bumping your shoulder into his as you walk towards his car.

“My eyesight is perfect, babe.” Steve gives you a wink that leaves you flustered and trying to understand what’s happening. “Come on.” He places the keys to his car on your hand and opens the passenger door.

Steve lounges back on his seat, pointing towards the direction he thinks you should go. He tells you when to break, what to do in an intersection and the roads you should avoid at a normal hour. Like he said, all of Hawkins is asleep and there’s not a single car on sight as you drive through the town. He was right, the nerves and awful dread you felt the first time you tried to drive his care are gone as you drive the empty streets; no one’s gonna hit you because no one’s here. The radio stays off though, you’re not a professional yet and the music only distracts you. There’s no way you’re crashing because you were singing to Blondie.

“You’re doing amazing.” Steve says, and you control your reaction to his praise. Knowing you’re doing a good job makes you feel giddy inside, so you glance at him quickly with a smile. “Pull into that parking lot right there. I think we can practice parking today.”

“Okay, good cause there are no cars for me to run into.” You joke, looking at Steve and laughing when he frowns. He doesn’t like you doubting yourself, right. “I’m kidding, Stevie.” You check your mirror, and turn the blinker on before you make a turn towards the parking lot. The concrete floor is deserted and fifty-something empty spaces stare back at you.

“Now what?”

“Okay,” Steve sits up straighter and rubs his chin, deep in thought. You can imagine the way his eyes light up when the idea finally comes to him. “Now you have to sort of turn away from the parking spot then turn back in.”

It sounds like gibberish for a moment before you go over his words and catch on to his explanation. Still, how can you pass up an opportunity to tease him?

“Real good explanation, Steve. Super clear.” You chuckle with an eye roll. “But I think I know what you mean.” Following his instructions, you drive the car towards the right before turning left and moving between the two white lines in front of you. At least that’s your intention, but what you end up doing is driving over one of the lines –taking two spaces.

“Come on don’t make that face, it’s your first try.” Steve shakes his head taps the dashboard. “Check the rear-view and backup. You got it.”

You do as Steve says and try to park on the spot next to you, turning a little more to the right so when you drive into the empty space, you’re perfectly parked in between both lines. “There! I did it!” You cheer, putting the car on park and turning to Steve. “Ha!”

He’s smiling too, celebrating this small win and high-fiving you. Steve’s fingers intertwine with yours and keep your hands in his hold, giving them a tight squeeze. There’s happiness and affection shining in his eyes –brown and beautiful and a little sleepy from how early it is– making your blood fizzy under your skin and your body feel like it’s glowing. There’s no one in this world like him, someone who is your cheerleader and makes you feel this happy and safe. And in love.

But the glint in his eye tells you he’s going to say something; you definitely missed something. “You didn’t check the right-side mirror babe; a car can come from your right, and you could’ve crashed into them.”

“Ugh!” You lean you head back on the headrest and look at the roof. Defeat washes over you, there’s so many rules to this driving gig; just when you think you’ve got it right, it’s actually the opposite. Your hands cover your face. “Fucking mirrors.”

Steve laughs next to you, a warm and beautiful sound that wipes away your frown as he shakes his head. His hand takes one yours again a moment later and gives it a squeeze. “It’s only a matter of time.”

Glancing to your right at him you feel your heart dance in your chest at his soft smile. His eyes dance around your face in a way you can’t really describe, and it flusters you beyond words. You smile at him though, ignoring the acrobatics your stomach is performing and the feelings rising to the surface once more. He’s your friend and he’s helping you, nothing more. Don’t make it something it’s not.

Steve is the one who breaks the moment first, eyes going back towards the dashboard. His hand lets go in favour of motioning towards the steering wheel. “Come on, let’s keep practising.”

“Can we go get coffee after?” You ask as you spot the sun beginning to rise in the distance.

“Anything for you babe, you just gotta learn how to park.” Steve settles back on his seat and you look out your window to bite back your smile. He’s got to stop talking to you so sweetly.”

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

“Can they please stop honking!” You mutter. The burning orange of the setting sun is shining through the trees and painting the dark asphalt in front of you as you drive by. It would be beautiful if not for the car that’s been tailgating you for five minutes now. To say you’re frustrated at the incessant sound of its honking would be an understatement, you’re sweating buckets, and you can hear your pulse in your ears. Your shoulders are tense and pulled tight towards your ears and there’s nothing you wish more than to arrive to Steve’s place. “Stevie.” You plead, gripping the steering wheel tightly.

“Ignore them, you’re doing great.” Comes Steve’s easy response, but he still checks the rear-view mirror and glares at the car behind you. “Of course, it’s some dude in a truck.” You hear him mutter as he shakes his head.

“I’m sweating, I told you I can’t drive on this road yet.” You complain, rolling your shoulders back to ease the tension. “But no, you had to insist.”

“Well, you had to eventually, babe.” Steve shrugs leaning towards the window and looking at you. Then after a sigh, he adds, “Nothing’s going to happen, relax alright.”

Another loud honk helps you do the opposite.

“Tell him to fuck off.” You groan, glancing at the truck behind you. Great now he’s flicking his headlights at you. “I’m literally driving at the speed limit.”

Steve shakes his head and motions to the road ahead, where the lane splits into two. “You’re fine, look, he can drive past you now.” Right on cue the truck accelerates and drives by, letting you breathe. Your shoulders sag, and when you spot a dinner in the distance you finally relax. There’s no way you’re driving the rest of the way.

“Okay, you’re switching places with me. I’ll try again tomorrow.” You announce after a sigh.

You turn the blinker on, and perfectly park on a free spot before shutting off the car and getting out. You look at the setting summer sun and breathe in to calm down, at least you made it halfway to Steve’s. Even the shirt you’re wearing feels stifling and your back is sweaty, so you take it off, which leaves you in a black tank top. “That made me age like 70 years.”

You look to your left and find Steve looking at you in that way you both hate and secretly love. He’s leaning against the car, arms crossed in front of him, and his eyes have gone soft. They linger on you, like he loves watching you, like you’re his favourite sight. But is it him or you projecting that? What does that mean, Steve, what is this look? You shake your head and look away; he always looks so handsome in the golden hour, you can’t catch a break. “I’m sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry for, stop apologizing.” He rolls his eyes, sounding exasperated but fond as he offers you a hug. You’re quick to step into his arms and relax against him, you stand no chance when it comes to Steve. He calls and you’ll always answer. Though you wish for nothing more than to bury your face in his neck and breathe him in, let yourself melt against him, you don’t. That it would be weird and you’re just friends. “You, okay?”

You nod against his shoulder and hug him tighter. “Yeah, I just wish I didn’t get so nervous.” It’s been like this a few days, you stopping and getting out of the car; it’s frustrating and a big blow to your confidence every time. “

“You know I don’t mind driving you, right?” Steve mumbles against your hair, his thumbs rubbing circles on your lower back. “If this is stressing you out too much we can stop, I’m happy to drive you anywhere.”

“I know that, Stevie.” You whisper as you close your eyes, deciding to tell him about your dream. “But I had a nightmare the other week, we were in the middle of nowhere, you were really hurt and I couldn’t drive you to the hospital. It was horrible but it made me realise if that happened, I wouldn’t be able to help and I don’t want that.”

“Babe.” Steve sighs, his hands pressing firmly up and down your back. “That won’t happen, it was just a bad dream.”

“I know, but in the off chance that it happens, I want to know that I can help you, Stevie.” You say, shutting your eyes tightly as the image of a hurt Steve comes back. There’s no way you’re losing him over something as simple as driving.

“Alright, we’ll see this through then.” Steve breathes out, holding you for a moment longer before he places a kiss to your temple and steps back. His beaming smile is back on his face, to ease your nerves, you’re sure; it works. “Let’s go, the ice cream’s going to melt. Good job today.”

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

“Are you sure?” You ask Steve on a Monday morning, one month of practice later you’re ready to take your driving test. Steve Harrington is offering you his car for the test.

“Of course, babe.” Steve shrugs and hands you his keys. “Let’s go get that license.”

You want to smile at him, thank him for how wonderful he’s been but there’s a sadness creeping into your heart and it casts a shadow over your joy. No more lessons after today. Steve is probably sick of you already. You, on the other hand, don’t want this to end, you want to spend more time with him. Hell, you want to spend all of your time with him. Steve notices your frown and steps closer to you, his hand reaches for yours.

“What’s wrong?” A gentle squeeze.

You let go of his hand and lie. “Nothing, I’m just nervous.” With a half-hearted chuckle you leave his side and walk towards his car. “We should get going.”

The drive towards Hawkins High is quiet, with you concentrating and ignoring your aching heart and Steve looking out his window. It’s still early and the town is quiet around you when you drive by. You’ve come so far since your first day and this is where it ends, with you coming closer to Steve after all those hours spent together –something you didn’t think could be possible. Now you’re trying to think of excuses to continue the driving lessons but come up empty handed. Maybe this was all a mistake, the worst mistake, for now your feelings are all over the place and the words I’m in love with you are on the tip of your tongue.

Your favourite song comes on the radio, and you don’t pay it any mind; you can see Steve look at you in surprise from the corner of your eye. Then, because he’s wonderful, the most wonderful and caring boy, he reaches for your hand and squeezes it tightly.

“Hey, I know you’re scared.” He says gently, “And I know me saying this doesn’t help but…”

Steve takes a deep breath, and you squeeze his hand again before he continues. “I’m not lying when I say you’re ready, so please relax this is your favourite song.”

With a quick glance at him, a grin breaks free and soon you’re laughing as Steve turns up the volume and sings loudly. “There’s a room where the light won’t find you! Holding hands while the walls come tumbling down!”

You laugh and smile and sing with him, letting nerves and aborted confessions slide off your back for now. “When they do, I’ll be right behind you!”

The two of you continue to drive like that, happy and carefree and clutching the other’s hand –like you’re unwilling to let go– until the song ends right as you arrive at the high school. Your smile is replaced by a frown and you glance at Steve as you spot the evaluator. He’s a middle-aged man wearing a plaid shirt and khaki pants, black rimmed glasses are perched on top of his nose, and a mustache sits over a deep frown. “He looks so grumpy.”

“Well, it’s 9am on a Saturday.” Steve says simply, “He probably hates you.”

Your eyes widen and you glare at your friend. “Steve!”

When he laughs you shove his shoulder and roll your eyes. Leave it to him to be a jerk when you’re already nervous. “Get out, the faster we’re done the better.”

“Okay, okay.” Steve turns on his seat to face you and his hands move to hold your face. Your next breath catches on your throat at his actions as you look into his lovely brown eyes. They’re full of faith in you, encouraging you with only one look. “Good luck.” He whispers as his thumb rubs at the apple of your cheek. Brown eyes drift down to your lips, and Steve’s face leans the tiniest bit closer to yours. Is he going to…?

Then just as fast as it happens, he’s stepping out of the car; you feel the ghost of his touch burns your skin. Not a moment later, the evaluator gets into the car.

“Seatbelt.” You mutter, watching Steve’s retreating figure head towards the bench by the entrance. Is there a tiny chance that Steve feels the same way about you?

“Let’s start.” The man next to you grumbles, snapping you back into action.

Your mind is half present on the test and half wondering about what just happened. Following your usual route through town, you come to a conclusion. Of two facts you’re absolutely sure. One: You’re hopelessly in love with Steve, and a moment ago you thought he would absolutely kiss you. The other, well the man sitting next to you hasn’t said a single word since the test started. His only instructions were Just drive. And so, you drive. Every time you try to ask something he shakes his head, so after a few turns around main street, you go back to the school.

You heave a sigh as you parallel park and shut down the engine. “Well?”

“Passed.” The evaluator hands you a slip of paper with your test without another word. You don’t care as you thank him quickly and run out of the car, towards Steve.

“Stevie!” You yell, meeting him halfway as he run towards you, and waving the piece of paper frantically. “I passed!”

“Babe! I told you so!” His arms are around you a moment later, holding you tightly and lifting you off the ground just like the day your quest for a driver’s license started. You hold onto him just as tightly, laughing against his shirt as he spins you around. “Told you, you could do it!”

When you’re back on the ground and look up at Steve, the same joy you’re feeling is shining back from his beautiful brown eyes. All the same emotions including love, in the very same way it sparkles whenever you’re looking at him. Your best friend who’s also so kind-hearted and amazing, and so devastatingly handsome, you never stood a chance against falling for him. This is who you love, who you want. The man who woke up at 6 in the morning to teach you how to drive, who chased off your fears and cheered on your wins with hugs and sweet milkshakes; the one who never once lost his temper, no matter how much you messed up. Steve who let you use his car.

“It's all thanks to you.” You whisper, hand going to his cheek and drifting upwards towards his hair. “Thank you, Stevie.”

“You know I would do anything for you.” Is all he says, his voice matching yours.

You nod, smiling a teary smile when your emotions overflow. “I love you so much, you have no idea. And I know it’s stupid but I don’t want to stop spending all that time with you just ‘cause I passed my test.”

“I think you don’t know this, but,” Steve smiles disarming you in a second as he leans closer to you. “I’m crazy about you, babe, I want to be with you all the time.”

“Really?” Your voice is breathless as you lean closer.

“Would I wake up at the crack of dawn just to see you, if I didn’t?” His lips are so close to yours you can feel your breath mingling. Then after a pause, he whispers softly, “I love you.”

Leaning up on your tiptoes you close the gap between you and kiss him. It’s a short press of lips before Steve’s hands hold your face to kiss you better, angling your faces in the perfect way to deepen the kiss. He takes your bottom lip between his, your hands run through his hair, and the brush of his lips is as soft and as urgent as you dreamed they would be. How many times have you imagined this exact moment and still be so unprepared thing. Kissing Steve is wonderful, it’s perfect, it feels like drinking stardust and glowing from within. You can tell how much both of you have wanted this from the overwhelming emotions threatening to consume you; the fact that it’s taken you so long makes you giggle against his mouth.

“What?” Steve asks against the corner of your lips, unwilling to pull away.

“Nothing,” You shake your head, stepping back and looking up at him. “I’m just so happy.”

His gaze goes impossibly softer as he looks at you, “Me too.”

A long moment later, you steal another kiss because you can, and take Steve’s hand. “Celebratory breakfast?” “You got it, beautiful.” Steve says, eyes unable to contain his affection towards you. He leads both of you back to his car, swinging your hands between your bodies. “You’re driving.”

reblogs are appreciated💖 motivate an unmotivated writer pls

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington fic #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington stranger things #stranger things fic #steve harrington fanfic

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tvgals · 10 months

Text

‘ CHILL OUT ‘

pt.3

READ PARTS 2 AND 1 BEFORE READING THIS !

— e42! miles morales x black! fem! reader

synopsis — you’ve been cheated on, you’ve been lied to, and you’ve been heartbroken but you damn well ain’t gon be wallowing in self pity forever.

“you’re not mad?” jess asks you, her face covered in surprise. “nope.” you shrug, grabbing your bag full of snacks and walking out of the store, jess trying to follow up behind you. “on god?” she inquires, biting the inside of her cheek. you kept on walking without any response. “i take that as a no. look, please don’t say anything to jaya. she really trusts me and-“ jess is cut off with you heaving a sigh. “you’ve been talking shit too, huh?” you confront jess, well..not really..it’s more of a yes or no question. “what? ahah! why would you say that?” jess chuckles nervously, twiddling her thumbs.

“i’ve known jaya since sixth grade and i been living in brooklyn since i was born. i know when people talk shit about me, i’m not an idiot. so i will ask you one more time,” you take a deep breath. “have you been talking shit?” jess sighs and stops walking, turning around and walking the other way. that was enough of an answer for you. “fuckin’..” you mumble, walking back to your dorm. everything fell apart within the span of two days. you learned your boyfriend cheated on you, your so called “friend” was talking shit about you to someone new. this was terrible. you missed miles, as much as you hate to say it. you wanted him to hold you and have him tell you he loves you and all of this never happened. you look on your key ring and see the key to miles’ dorm room. you change routes and head over to his room, hoping it’d just be him so his roommate wouldn’t have to hear the oh so awkward conversation. you walk up the stairs leading to the dorms and find yourself outside miles’,contemplating on leaving. before you could think anymore, you insert the key into the lock and walk in, the smell of miles’ cologne hitting your nose. you walk into miles’ room to see him on the bed, seeming as if he’s sleeping. you knew this was a dumb idea. you bite your lip and turn to leave.

“come back..” miles mumbles, rolling into the wall to make room for you. “miles-“ you groan. “just come here. please.” you take your shoes off and lay next to him, trying to not make bodily contact with your ex. in his bed. you and miles sit in silence for a while, listening to the bustling sound of traffic outside and the occasional laughter of children walking down the street. “miles.” you whisper, turning to face him. “yeah?” he whispers right back. “what really happened?” you ask, watching miles hands inch closer to your own.

“if i tell you this you won’t do nothing stupid, right?” miles turns to you, cocking a brow. “promise.” you tell him. miles sighs. “y’know that party i went to like a month ago?” you nod. “i was walking ‘round talkin’ to people, and yo’ lil’ friend jaya came up to me talking bout how she wanted to get put on with me — so i said no cause i already got a girl, right?” you nod along while miles talks. “then she was talking ‘bout how she was better than you this that and the third and i’m like, ‘what?’ you feel me?” you scrunch your face up. someone has to be lying. it’s either him or jaya. “wait wait,” you interrupted him. “jaya said you called her phone?” miles scrunches his face up and looks at you crazy.

“forreal? nah, she’s lying to you ma’.” miles chuckles lowly, pulling you into his side. “are you sure?” you question him, ignoring the fact he told you he did inafct cheat.

“mhm.”

you couldn’t help but think he was lying too, miles was prone to lie. like the time he said he would come home at 9 and came home at 2:30 in the morning or the time he told you he’d never lie to you, but he did, and you couldn’t help but think he’s doing it again. “you’re a liar, miles.” you whisper into his stature.

“i wouldn’t lie to you-“ “but you would. you’ve done it countless times and you expect me to fall for it again. well i won’t, miles morales,” you tell him, pushing yourself off of the bed and walking out his room. “baby, come back.” miles says sternly, getting up and following behind you. “no. you can’t force me to stay here wit’ yo lying, cheating ass. you told me you cheated,” you pointed an accusatory finger into his chest. “and you wanna sit here and sweet talk me? well it’s not gonna fucking work.” you sniff, turning around and walking out the door.

you were gonna get your revenge and fast.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

TAGLIST ; — @venusluvslove @mangolog @ohmaiscool15 @ohsanghoe @iiilovemilfs @garnetj @guapaneeseb @nekoweb @samndwich @cloudniteee @azadabts @elitesanjisimp @theyfwkayla14 @lennielane @kelesisworld @aaliyahlia-babyy @dorkmuffin27 @markleedreams @violxtbxbyy @pinkluvrr @yourrfavzxri @noraloralei @anoungsoneandonly @neteyamsmunch @1lennii @

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yanderemommabean · 1 year

Note

Southern yandere being raised on those good morals and Christian values until they meet reader. Being the apple of the towns eye and everyone’s favorite golden boy turned into a savage mess when anyone dares to mess with his darling! Perverted once he see’s reader in revealing clothes for the summer (to beat that southern heat!). Suddenly he has to pray more often since only not so sacred thoughts come to mind when he thinks of you (which is ALL the time). The polite manners being CRANKED UP when they are in ur vicinity. The oh so bold flirting! BEING COURTED by the most desired guy in TOWN. And no one would help u girl, u think THE (his name) would bother stalking YOU? How pretentious. Knows how to court a lady but if you keep on playing hard to get he’ll just have to show you he’s the BEST and ONLY option for you.

“Well hello there August!” You say with a sweet smile, fanning yourself by tugging at your shirt as sweat seeps into the fabric. “What brings you by? Needing more chicken eggs?” you ask, used to the man asking for one or more things he could buy from you or help you out with. Always so courteous and gentlemen like, even when you insist he doesn’t have to be.

It’s sweet, you’ll admit. He’s been trying his best to be sweet and kind to you, even the town is beginning to think you’re all he worries about anymore. His duties often get neglected when you’re on his mind, which seems to be every hour of the day.

“No, no, I was just comin by to see why you’re working in heat like this. You could get killed if you aint careful y’know? Jesse nearly had a heat stroke a few days ago ‘cause he thought he could handle the stables all by himself”

You snort, dusting your hands off on your jeans “Well, I ain’t Jesse. Jesse needs to learn a thing or two about asking for help when he needs it too, I learned that lesson the hard way”. August laughs at that, tipping his hat as he does so. “Yeah, boy aint the brightest. I’ll give you that. You wouldn’t mind taking a break for sweet tea or anything would ya? I’d love to waste your time for a bit”.

Nodding, you begin to walk into your house, heading to the sink to wash your hands from the dirt and muck covering them from the chores. “I’ll make ya a glass in just a sec, let me get a bit cleaned up. You get your things done today? Pastor told me to yell at you a bit if you lagged behind one more time. Think he meant it too, ‘is face was redder than hell”.

August comes up from behind, wrapping his arms around you as you stand at the sink. Your face dusts pink as he lays his head on your shoulder, his breath right on your ear as he gruffly says “Don’t worry about what he says. I know what I’m doing, and how I’m gonna do it. Anyone gives you more trouble you come to me alright?”

The sudden playful mood felt more tense, his arms squeezing you tight against him as your voice struggled to come out. “You’re like a hen, I swear. I'm not some dainty little belle, I can tell a pastor off if I need to. Now sit down, I’ll make you a glass”.

You two sit and chat for a while, August giving you stares that you couldn’t quite read from time to time as you mention how your life here was going. He was a real sweetheart, a man of manners and good values, it’s no wonder the whole town loves him. But there's something there, stirring and growing, you just don’t know it yet.

It’s a dark, unleashed beast of a thing for sure.

-------------

Six months have passed since you’ve moved down here, and the winter seems awfully brutal. Your house is refusing to stay warm lately, and as much as you hate to admit it, you’re terrible with a wood cutting axe. Never could get the aim right.

As if on cue, the towns most beloved bachelor comes driving into your yard in his truck, practically leaping out as he runs to you with a worried and dare you say frustrated appearance. “What on earth has gotten into you? Put me down!” you hollered, being lifted up over his shoulder with ease as he carries you inside without so much as a hello.

“Me? What’s gotten into you? It’s below freezing and you’re out there trying to cut wet wood that won’t burn! You’re gonna get frost bite, and momma won’t let me hear the end of it if I let you get hurt!”

“For your information I was doing just fine!” you scold, being dropped down gently onto your couch as he stands over you, arms crossed over his chest. “...I ain’t moving until you promise me you won’t go back out there in weather like this”

“Unfair game to me. Seeing as alls I gotta do is tickle you in the right spot to get you out of my way”

“Dangerous game to play to me, seeing as your touch would do a bit more than tickle me” he says with a seductive tint to his voice, his face coming down to meet yours as you become more flustered “A touch from a sexy thing like you, wouldn’t make me move out of the way. It’d make me pick you up and show you how I wanna touch you too”

You both stay there for a minute, your eyes becoming playful and your tone more flirty as you lean closer, daring to kiss his lips. “Hmm. And what would your momma think if something happened before marriage?”

“Who says I can’t make you say my name without breaking that rule?”

“Oh now you’re just being a mean old flirt. Is this your way of warming me up? Cause as much as I like it, I do need to get work done”

August doesn’t budge. If anything, he seems determined to tower over you like this, keeping you in place. “I think you’d be better off at my house for a few days. Especially since the holidays are coming up and the weather is only gonna get worse” he says as if he didn’t just act like he would go a few rounds in the bedroom with you.

“We’ve talked about this-”

“I know. You’re worried about the animals and such. Never said I wouldn’t let you come by to do your stuff, I just think you need a place with actual heat since this place is clearly in need of more repair than we thought. It ain’t gotta be a month or nothing, just til we get it fixed”

You worry your lip, unsure and not exactly comfortable with just staying a few nights at his house. “The town will think we’re being a bit-”

“The town also thinks aunt Susie's pie is the best, but they ain’t right in that regard either” he cuts you off, taking your cold hand and kissing your fingertips softly “I won’t do nothing, I promise. I’ll even let the church and every gossiper in town have a piece of my mind if they start making you upset. Just please, let me keep you warm. It’ll break my heart if I know you’re suffering like this any longer”

His eyes are so sweet as they plead, and how he holds and warms your hands makes this deal all the more enticing. What can you say? You really have no other choice, and you’re so lucky to have him here for you like this. “A-alright, August. Just until we figure out why my heat aint working. No more than that”

Oh, just knowing you’d come willingly at all is more than he could’ve asked for. He hates having to force his hand in these situations, but it’s needed! That’s why he had to ruin your heating system, to show you that he’d be the better option in the long run and he could get you out of that shithole house faster.

But he won’t tell his little secret. The plan is to get you in his home, then in his bed, and in his arms. Town can think whatever they want, but no one would suspect him of sabotage and stalking. He plays his role very well, knows how to manipulate anyone who tries and ruin his chance with you. If they push too hard for you to leave, he might just stage another accident or two.

Whatever it takes to keep you with him and him only.

((HI! I hope this didn’t go too off the rails, I really enjoyed it! I hope you did too! -Mommabean))

#yandere male #yandere scenarios #yandere imagines #mommabean #southern yandere #August my oc #my ocs

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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 2 months

Text

Happy Tears

insecure virgil who fears that janus and remus only kept him close out of pity because of his anxiety – anon

I’m not putting the whole ask heard bc by god is it long

Read on Ao3

Warnings: panic attacks, insecure virgil, touch starvation

Pairings: virgil/janus/remus, can be platonic or romantic you decide

Word Count: 3970

Virgil is no stranger to tears. Of fear, of anger, of panic, of sadness. Especially since he's become distant from his family, the two people who he misses more than his own shadow. Perhaps, though, he is not the only one missing someone so terribly it aches.

There are few things more truly upsetting than learning that someone you thought cared for you is only doing so out of the genuine kindness they themselves possess and not out of anything that makes you special to them.

Everything they have done for you, every bit of kindness paid to you, every time you thought to go to them because you knew they would make you feel safe…all of it is a testament to how good of a person they are and has nothing to do with you. You are but another recipient of their kindness. There isn’t anything that differentiates you from everyone else they choose to be kind to because they are kind and the world is all the better for it and their world would only change slightly if you were no longer receiving that kindness. And there is something…oddly wonderful about that, for how lucky are you to have known even a day of kindness, and how crushing it is to discover that it isn’t your own virtue that sprung up that desire for kindness.

Perhaps that, in and of itself, is a whole new kind of selfishness.

Virgil knows, he does, that he is not easy to care for. He doesn’t make it easy, how can he, when his brain is constantly trying to make itself believe the worst? How can he, when even the merest offer of kindness is misconstrued to be a trick? Or when he lashes out in fear and anger and hurts those who would come to help him? What use is there for something that breaks if someone so much as looks at it wrong?

He tried to explain it once, when the kindness had come in the form of soft words and gentle questions, to say that he becomes convinced that everyone secretly hates him, that every time he’s gone they all think about how much better it would be if he didn’t come back, or that one day they’ll realize how much of a pain he is to deal with and cut him swiftly from their lives like a chunk of dead wood. And because his brain is his brain, the words had no more formed than a swift rebuttal arose, stating how cruel it was that he thought that of them, how mean it was, how unjust it was for him to think of them like that. And he’d wanted to scream at that part of himself that he wasn’t doing it on purpose, he couldn’t help it, that was him trying to explain why his brain was such an asshole, not what he was doing to make the job of paying him kindness even more challenging.

But in the end, the other side won, and he swallowed the words behind his hoodie strings.

He’s messy. He’s too messy for them to deal with. And now that they don’t have to do it anymore, why would they bother?

Because it wasn’t just the three of them in the dark anymore. It wasn’t the frantic skittering of spider legs and the wet sloshing of tentacles and the comforting hisses of a snake, no. Now the cobwebs blew through near-empty corridors as the glimmer of light led toward laughing and talking and the glimmers of a better place. The sun looked so nice sparkling on the tops of the waves, and snakes did better in the warmth of the bright light, but spiders scuttled and hid in the shadows because no one wants to look at a spider if they can help it.

He gets the irony. Really, he does. He was the first one to leave. He left them first. And he dragged his feet all the way there while the others sought to bring them out too. What right did he have to say they left him?

But how could he go to Patton, who was sweet and kind and strong enough to believe unwaveringly in the good of the world and ask him to love a spider? How could he face that with snot and tears running down his face while he screamed and shouted? How could he go to Logan, who was clever and compassionate and tell him he didn’t know what to do? How could he explain what he was doing when it was at its very core irrational? How could he go to Roman, who was brave and kind and good and ask him for anything? How could he? How dare he?

And how could he contrast the three of them with Janus and Remus, when they had been with him for as long as he could remember? How could he believe the others too good for him when everyone always had been?

No. He was too much. They didn’t deserve to deal with that. He would deal. By himself. That was better.

And it’s not like it’s all bad. He’s not—he’s not totally alone. He’s got them, he does. He has people now. He could go and talk to them if he wanted to. And they’re good people. They would listen. Because they’re kind like that. They scoop spiders up in paper towels or cups and put them outside so they can run free.

Virgil just squashes them on sight.

No. This was okay. He could make it easier for them. He can give them Virgil to deal with, not the spider.

He…he’ll be the spider by himself. In his dirty webs covered in flies. He can…he can do this. They don’t need to deal with him.

It doesn’t matter that the webs blow around all the time in the empty corridors. It doesn’t matter that the nights get colder and colder with no other moving creatures around. It doesn’t matter that he has to build his web in secret corners the Light has forgotten about.

It’s better this way.

…he just has to get over it.

***

“Virgil?”

Virgil pulls an earbud out of his head. “Yeah, Princey?”

“I have a question for you and I don’t want you to throw anything at my head.”

“So ask me a question that doesn’t make me want to throw something at your head, I don’t understand what the problem is.”

Roman sighs, huffing something that could be a laugh as he swats halfheartedly at Virgil’s leg. “Why don’t you come to movie night anymore?”

Okay. Stay calm. There’s a way to handle this question without summoning the snake.

“After all the bullshit you guys have been giving me about getting my sleep schedule on track?” He scoffs. “Now you want me to throw it all away?”

“Movie nights normally end at like, ten at the latest. And we can always start earlier if it’s really a big deal.”

“Nah.” He waves a hand. “Just not my thing.”

Roman narrows his eyes. ‘So it doesn’t have anything to do with the fact that Janus and Remus have started coming to more of them?”

Shit. Shit. Shit. “What’s it to you, Princey?”

“Just—is it?”

Virgil hunches his shoulders. “What if it was? Would you stop inviting them?”

“No, but—“

“Then I don’t get why we’re having this conversation.” Virgil jams his earbud back into his ear and turns up the volume. He can see Roman still talking but he’s not listening. He’s not. He’s done with that. “I can’t hear you, you know.”

“Take the earbud out, then.”

Virgil sighs but does, turning to glare at Roman. “What?”

”I just—they miss you, Virgil.”

Now he really does scoff. “They don’t miss me.”

“I don’t think you get to decide that for them.”

“What the fuck could they possibly miss about me?” His hand balls up around the discarded earbud. “And what—no. You’re wrong, Princey. They don’t miss me.”

Roman just looks at him. His eyes narrow slightly. He’s staring at him like he’s trying to figure out what Virgil’s talking about, which—if Roman doesn’t understand there’s nothing about Virgil worth missing, that means he needs to leave before Roman figures that out.

”Whatever,” he mutters under his breath, getting up from the couch, “just—don’t ask me stupid questions.”

”Virgil, wait—“

Roman grabs his arm.

Three things happen at the same time.

First, a burning sensation rockets up Virgil’s arm and shocks his chest.

Second, his throat constricts and squeezes around every sound he could ever possibly make.

Third, he feels a very familiar tug in his gut as someone, or more accurately, two someones notice that something is wrong.

He rips his arm away from Roman and sinks out, scrabbling frantically at his chest and arm to get that feeling off of him, make it stop, go away. The room buckles and shudders around him as he yanks his headphones off and tears at his clothes. He dives under the covers and curls up tight. The mass in his chest keeps building, building, building—

They almost found out. They almost found out and they can’t find out because if they find out they’ll want to deal with it and that’s awful of him to want to make them deal with him again, not again, he can’t do that to them, they’re too good for it, how dare he t try and make them deal with the mess that he is is, with the awful thing that he is, the horrible, awful, messy, terrible thing that he is. He can’t do that. He can’t do that to them. He can’t. He can’t. He can’t.

Shame on you, the tendrils of web hiss as they shoot out in all directions, shame on you. All Roman wanted to do was check in and you were awful to him.

Stop it, he pleads through a ruined chest, stop it, stop it, stop it!

You’re the awful one, it taunts, tying him up in sticky ropes, you’re the one who insists there’s nothing to miss about you. You’re right, who the fuck could miss this?

Another slimy web wraps around his throat, burning from how cold it is. A cruel wind howls in Virgil’s ears and he curls up tighter, fists pressed against his temples to try and drown it out.

You’re such an idiot, the voice hisses, because it’s in his head, so how could he ever drown it out? You’re such a fucking idiot. You can’t do anything right. You couldn’t even make yourself scarce right.

The howling wind stings his ears and his head pounds. The sticky webs fill his lungs and his nose and he can’t breathe through them. More webs tangle up in the spider’s legs and tears glue themselves to his cheeks. It doesn’t matter how hard he tries to curl up. The wind will find him.

It’s cold.

It’s so, so cold.

He weathers it for as long as he can. The webs shake and shudder in the storm as he cries and hyperventilates. His ears fill with merciless wind and he can’t make anything other than horrible, hitching sobs until the webs glue his mouth too. But when even the wind grows tired of him, he drags himself up out of the disgusting mess he’s made of the blankets and shambles to the bathroom.

The lights make him wince. He fumbles to turn on the sink. He shoves his sleeves up to his elbows and scrubs harshly at his face. He spits out mucus and tries to remember how to breathe like a normal person. He catches sight of his face in the mirror.

There is no tragic hero in what he sees, no dramatic catharsis, no pitiable victim or wounded survivor.

There’s just a mess. A drippy, bloated, disgusting mess.

He tears his eyes away from the mirror and scrubs his face with a towel. A bit of makeup comes off on it. As he looks at it, a memory flashes to the front of his mind.

Here, a soft voice says, try this first. This will take off most of it for you.

Not that I care, another voice says, I like it. Fuck up my towel as much as you want.

Despite everything, a laugh chokes its way from his throat. He rubs his thumb over the stain, again and again. Memories swirl around, of Janus coaxing him into a cuddle, of Remus rubbing his back and playing with his hair, of the both of them gently bullying him into the bath and then into a pile of soft blankets, of them whispering that it’s okay, everything’s okay, he’s going to be okay. On instinct, he turns to show it to them, but—

But he meets an empty, blank wall.

He clutches the towel to his chest. He slides down to curl up on the floor. The tile is cold under him.

This time, when he starts crying, he can’t blame the panic attack, or the webs, or the cold, or anything other than the fact that he is enough of a mess that he can make himself get this upset over nothing at all.

***

A robin, carrying a small piece of paper in its beak over a forest of bare trees and strange creatures.

A raven, landing atop a glistening balustrade.

A deer, walking across a perilous stone bridge with a small basket strapped to its back.

A shambling rock beast with a secret compartment in its chest, crawling up the side of a babbling brook.

A dragon with gleaming red scales flying towards a tall tower of oily black stone.

A Kraken emerging from the water depths in the moat of a shining castle.

A plan.

***

Virgil gets up at the knock on his door, frowning when he opens it to see no one on the other side. He’s about to write it off as a very unoriginal prank, when he notices the card lying on the floor. He frowns, going to pick it up., A gold wax seal holds it closed and he rolls his eyes fondly as he closes his door.

Princey truly is one for the dramatics.

He opens the card, setting the envelope down on his table. There’s a cute picture of a cottage on the front and very simple text that reads: ‘Imagination. 6PM. Come and see.’

It’s li Princey knew he wasn’t getting up before 3 at the latest. He glances at the clock—2:45–and decides that yeah, sure, why not? Roman has good surprises in the Imagination more often than not, and it’s not like he’ll have to stay if he really doesn’t like whatever it ends up being.

He flips the card over to the back and laughs when he sees the other text Roman’s left for him. No tricks. Just for you. Promise.

“You’re a dork, Princey.”

When 6 rolls around, he tucks the card in the pocket of his hoodie and ambles over to the door the Imagination. He debates if he should knock—that would be polite, right?—but as soon as he raises his hand, the door swings open. He steps through into a late-afternoon path through a glade of trees. Sunlight slants through the leaves, golden light touching the stones in the path leading up to the cottage from the card. The air is pleasantly warm, not too hot for his hoodie, nor cold enough to make him grateful for it. The door to the Imagination swings shut behind him, its outline glowing for a moment before it melds seamlessly with the forest path. The smell of wildflowers and the sound of faintly-buzzing bees follows him as he walks up to the cottage.

The door opens with barely a creak as he steps inside. A tiny kitchen sits at his immediate left, a small staircase leading up to a second floor on his right. Directly in front of him are a set of large windows, each framed by curtains, and a giant mound of pillows in the centre of the floor. A fireplace sits ready and waiting tucked into the recess of one wall, directly opposite a table pushed against the side of the room. The windows are cracked, just slightly, and he realizes they’re doors. Huge glass doors that can be opened up to let the evening air in. He wanders forward, drawn by the pile that seems to sparkle in the golden hour light, his hand going to the card in his pocket.

”Wow,” he mumbles under his breath, taking another step forwards, “this…this is…wow.”

From above him, he hears the creak of floorboards, followed by footsteps on the stairs. He turns slightly to meet who he assumes is Roman, but doesn’t take his eyes off the pillows.

“This place is great, Princey. What’s the, uh, what’s the occasion?”

The footsteps come to a stop right behind him. Something out of the corner of his eye moves and he looks down to see two gloved hands wrap around his waist and pull him against a terrifyingly familiar chest.

“Gotcha,” Janus murmurs into his ear, “hi, sweetie.”

Virgil’s heart stops.

“I know Roman wrote ‘no tricks,’” Janus continues, voice still as soft and gentle as Virgil remembers, “but I’m afraid I may have…misled him a little. Not that he suspected otherwise, I’m sure, but I had a feeling you wouldn’t have come if you thought it wasn’t just Roman asking.”

“What—how—why—“

“Shh, sweetie,” he interrupts with a gentle squeeze around Virgil’s middle, “just let me talk for a little, okay? I’m not—I’m not sure if I can get all of it out if I don’t start now.”

Virgil’s mouth shuts and he nods jerkily.

“Thank you.” Janus takes a breath and Virgil can feel his hands trembling ever so slightly. “I…I’m the one who asked Roman to ask you about movie nights. I didn’t know it would upset you. I’m sorry.”

Virgil doesn’t say anything. He feels a shaky breath on the back of his neck.

“We miss you, sweetie,” comes the whisper, “we miss you, little spider.”

A whimper leaves his mouth before he can stop it and he claps his hands over his mouth to keep the rest of them in. He hears a soft noise of protest and another hand—right, because he can do that—covers them.

“I know you don’t believe me,” Janus says softly, “I know you don’t. It’s not your fault your brain is awful to you, sweetie. But I need you to believe me when I say we do miss you, Virgil, we miss you terribly.”

Virgil swallows. His throat works against the collar of his hoodie. Janus carefully pries his hands from his face and holds them tightly. The arms around his waist squeeze again.

“I miss you,” he croaks, the pillows blurring in front of him, “I miss you so much.”

“We miss you too, little spider, come back to us. Let us be with you again.”

“But I’m—“

“What,” Janus asks when Virgil chokes himself off, “what are you?”

“I’m so messy.”

The softest chuckle as Janus squeezes him again. “Since when has Remus shied away from a little mess? Since when have I?”

Virgil’s lip wobbles. He wants. He wants. He wants to believe so bad that this is real and they don’t care but they do care and the problem is that this is just how good they are, and it has nothing to do with him.

As if he can hear him, Janus sets his chin on Virgil’s shoulder, voice soft in his ear.

“Are you going to be stubborn, little spider?”

Oh, god.

Those words were whispered when the storms were too loud, or the bath was too cold, or the night too scary, when he was pulled into embraces whether he pouted about them or not, and he’s crying, he’s crying all over again, and he can’t say yes but he can’t say no.

“Alright, you asked for it.”

The arms and hands begin to pull away and he lets out a frightened noise and there’s a small shove in the small of his back and he’s tumbling into the pillows and the pillows are—opening?

A blur of black and green surges up from the middle of the pillows and wraps around him, pulling him deep into the soft pile and wriggling around until he’s neck-deep in them. He splutters and flails a little until the blur solidifies into arms and legs and a torso and a head buried into the crook of his neck, snuffling against the collar of his hoodie. He hears Janus chuckling in the background as a low purr rumbles against his chest and he—he—

“Little monster,” Remus mumbles happily, getting comfortable half on top of him, “I gotcha.”

“R-Remus?”

“Yeah, it’s me. You gonna be a pouty spider about it?”

Virgil couldn’t not be pouty if he tried right now, not when Remus is cuddling him and teasing him and it’s still so warm and soft. His lip wobbles again and he knows his eyes must be huge as Remus leans up just enough to kiss his nose.

“Aww,” he coos, half babying and all care, “you feeling lonely, little spider?”

Something collapses.

Virgil doesn’t know what’s happening, where he is, what is going on, only that he’s crying and Remus is holding him and Janus is here and he’s babbling something about being sorry and missing them and wanting them and not wanting to be a mess and crying all over them and everything is messy and sticky and perfect again. Remus keeps making his weird purring noise that makes Virgil’s tummy feel funny and Janus murmurs in his ears, filling them with soft words and gentle touches. The sun is warm and the light is soft and the world is still, just for a little while, just so that Virgil can be a mess and that’s okay.

“When you’re ready,” Janus says softly as his hand cards through Virgil’s hair, “you can have a shower upstairs and we can cuddle in the big bed.”

Remus hums in agreement, still half on top of him just to keep his soul squished into his body. A hiccuping breath is met with shushing and a gentle rub of his stomach. “You’re getting spoiled, little monster. You’ve deprived us of it for too long.”

“Mm.”

“A-bup-bup.” Remus holds a finger over Virgil’s mouth as he goes to protest. “No arguments, little monster. We care about you and you have to deal with it, understand?”

“Best nod and agree,” Janus threatens playfully, “he’s been in a mood all day.”

As fingers dig warningly into his side, Virgil squeaks and nods. Remus grins and presses a smacking kiss to his forehead. “You need to be a puddle for a bit longer?”

“…is that okay?”

“Of course,” Janus murmurs, sliding down to lie beside them, “whenever you’re ready.”

Remus just makes a gleeful noise and flops back down, going back to nuzzling him like he’s a cat. Which…he might be. Virgil’s not putting anything past him.

The world is still soft and safe as they lie there on the pillows. Twinkling motes of light come in through the big windows and a soft breeze starts to dry some of his tears. Remus is warm and solid on top of him, Janus’s hand gentle as they card through his hair. As Virgil blinks up at the ceiling, his eye catches on a silvery strand of something between two of the wooden boards. He follows it to a corner near the center beam splitting the roof, and he sees a glistening, sparkling spider web.

In the strands of the web are the words welcome home.

For the first time in who knows how long, Virgil cries happy tears.

General Taglist: @frxgprince@potereregina@gattonero17@iamhereforthegayshit@thefingergunsgirl@awkwardandanxiousfander@creative-lampd-liberties@djpurple3@winterswrandomness@sanders-sides-uncorrect-quotes@iminyourfandom@bullet-tothefeels@full-of-roman-angst-trash @ask-elsalvador @ramdomthingsfrommymind@demoniccheese83@pattonsandershugs @el-does-photography @princeanxious@firefinch-ember@fandomssaremysoul@im-an-anxious-wreck@crazy-multifandomfangirl @punk-academian-witch@enby-ralsei@unicornssunflowersandstuff@wildhorsewolf @thetruthaboutthesun @stubbornness-and-spite @princedarkandstormv @your-local-fookin-deadmeme @angels-and-dreams@averykedavra @a-ghostlight-for-roman @treasurechestininterweb @cricketanne @queerly-fluid-fan @compactdiscdraws@cecil-but-gayer@i-am-overly-complicated@annytheseal@alias290@tranquil-space-ninja @arxticandy @mychemically-imbalanced-romance@whyiask@crows-ace @emilythezeldafan@frida0043 @ieatspinalcords @snowyfires@cyanide-violence@oonagh2@xxpanic-at-the-everywherexx@rabbitsartcorner @percy-07734@triflingassailantofmyemotions @virgil-sanders-the-gay-emo@cerulean-watermelon@puffed-up-bees@meltheromanstan@joyrose-fandomer@insanitori@mavenmush@justablah65@10paradox10@uhhh-hi-there-i-am-nervous@cutebisexualmess@bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti@ultrageekygirl

#dragonbabbles #sanders sides #fic #virgil sanders #remus sanders #sympathetic remus #janus sanders #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #roman sanders

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prodigal-explorer · 5 months

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my dearest little prince (i)

(roman sanders hurt/comfort, cw for extreme self deprecation and janus dropping truth. features sympathetic janus!)

“My dearest little prince…what’s happened to you?”

Roman’s hollow eyes, darkened from sleep deprivation, were squeezed shut, tears spilling out the sides and down his cheeks. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Nobody was supposed to know. Not even Janus’ tender, lulling voice could pull him out of this panic.

“Baby, come here. Please. Let me help you. Let me hold you.”

Janus’ words were practically hypnotic to the tired, desperate young prince. Roman was so tired of being used, so tired of being an object. All he wanted was to be loved, just like everyone else, but it seemed that no matter what he did, no matter what positions he bent himself into, he could never change himself enough. He was still too Roman. Maybe his actions weren’t the problem, after all. Maybe Roman himself was to blame. Everything about him, after all, was wrong, no matter what he did and how he did it. Roman could feel his mind turn to fuzz, Janus’ words and form growing farther and farther away as he enveloped himself in a meager attempt at self-protection. After all, Roman had long learned that he couldn’t trust anybody else to protect him from anything.

This had to be a trap. It just had to be.

“When was the last time you ate?” Janus whispered, putting a hand on Roman’s shoulder. The prince flinched back, but Janus persisted, too anxious to be sensitive. “Baby, please. I’m worried about you. You’ve always been so fragile. And lately, it feels like you’ve just been floating away.”

“Yeah?” Roman whispered, his voice seething with hurt. “I wonder why.”

Janus blinked, and tilted his head, his brow furrowed. “What do you mean, darling?” he asked gently.

“Maybe I should float away,” Roman mumbled thickly as his tears started to suffocate him. “You all would like it so much better if I was gone. You play tricks on me to make me shut up or look stupid, you use me for your own agendas without even caring about mine, and then you betray me when all I ever wanted to do was help my friends! I wanted to be a prince, I wanted to be honorable and chivalrous, but- but what’s the point if it always ends with me alone? I’m the least favorite side, Janus. The least favorite. The least amount of fans like me, and the most amount of fans hate me.”

“That’s-…that’s not fair, Roman,” Janus whispered, but Roman interjected before Janus could continue.

“Maybe it is fair,” he snapped, “Someone has to be. Maybe it should be me. After all, I am the evil twin. No matter what I say or do, no matter how hard I try, people only care about the bad stuff I did, and none of the good stuff I’m doing. What’s the point of trying anymore? What’s the point of anything?”

Roman tried to keep ranting, but a whimper cut him off, and as he realized the weight of everything he was saying, he started to sob. He felt like he was being crushed under the weight of the situation. Never in his entire life had the little prince felt so helpless.

Janus took the opportunity to talk. He tried to hide his anger, not towards Roman, but towards everyone and everything that caused Roman to believe such terrible things were actually true. Himself included.

“My precious little one,” Janus murmured, carefully pulling Roman’s limp and trembling limbs into a hug. “You are not evil. Evil people don’t worry about whether or not they’re evil. Evil people don’t cry as you do now. You are so, so good, my darling. And I’m sorry that nobody has told you that. I’m sorry that you’ve felt so alone for so long. You try harder than anybody I know. You are so ready to learn and change that sometimes I worry that you’ll lose yourself one day and never find it again.”

“Would that really be such a bad thing?” Roman muttered to Janus’ chest.

“Of course it would!” Janus scolded gently, starting to rhythmically pet Roman’s curly hair and support his delicate form. “Roman, you are so special. You’re so…beautiful. I’ve never met anybody else who sees the world the way you do, with such wonder. With such color. You sing when no audience is around to applaud you. You speak to things that can’t speak back. You care so much about everything. You care more than anybody I’ve ever met.”

There was silence and stillness in the room for a very long time, not a sound except for occasional sniffling from Roman. And then, the creative side fully launched himself into Janus’ arms, letting his sorrow carry him as he melted into Janus’ secure, but gentle hold, sobbing into his shoulder and letting Janus support his weight, trusting him to keep him upright.

“My baby…my sweet baby,” Janus whispered, “You’ve been hurting for a long time, haven’t you?”

Roman couldn’t speak. He couldn’t act, he couldn’t ask for more than this. For so long, he had been trying to act more mature, so he could be taken more seriously. But it felt so good to just cry, and be a child again, even if just for a moment. Janus seemed to innately know that Roman needed this. Maybe Janus cared more than Roman thought.

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is-emily-real · 4 months

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resolutions

The den was warm, the smell of cinnamon and wine drifting from their mugs as they spoke. It was that liminal space between Christmas and New Year’s, that time when the days seemed to pass like hours and years simultaneously.

Their number was quite diminished, what with Robin and Argyle visiting family out of state and Eddie dutifully DMing a campaign for the kids while he had the time. Chrissy thought being fourth-wheel to two guys and the girl they used to date would have its oddities, but the atmosphere had stayed surprisingly pleasant.

“You all have any resolutions for 1987?” Nancy asked, cuddling her mug. The alcohol brought a pretty flush to her cheeks and a sparkle to her eyes. She got why the boys fell in love with her.

It was an innocuous question, but it made her lose herself in thought, half listening to Steve and Jonathan as they discussed the concept.

She’d never had any before. They were always prescribed to her, handed down like jail sentences by her mother and rigorously enforced. Study more, look pretty, lose ten pounds, twenty, thirty, more and more and more until she felt like a shell of herself, barely able to stave off a headache at the slightest stressor.

Then, all of a sudden, the night terrors started, and she thought it was just Jason being sweet when he asked her to talk to the counselor, wrapped her in his letterman jacket and prayed over her, but it helped a little.

After a few days, the comments started, backhand statements about how terrible it was she was so fatigued, how much it was stressing him out, how she should already be better and was she sure she was trying enough? But he was always doting in front of her friends, the picture of a perfect gentleman when others could see.

When Eddie offered her something that could make her sleep, she jumped at the chance, surprised to learn he genuinely wanted to soothe her worries. He was a point of hope, a soft heart in a hard world despite his spiky exterior.

She hadn’t expected hell in the place of help.

That thing took her, spun her like a top, snared her in those awful vines and made her watch as he tortured the others, as he destroyed her home, as children stepped up to keep him at bay. They were so brave, all of them, and they got cut to shreds for it.

But the girl, El, came, and the bonds burned Chrissy’s skin until the red sky overhead faded to black, and when they turned to ice, she swore the sleep deprivation wasn’t that bad.

Gentle hands lifted her, pulled her back into a reality she could understand, held her close until she was free of the shadows. She came to in her aunt’s bed with only swirling pink scars to confirm her story.

She idly traced one along her arm. Did she have any resolutions beyond preventing the coming year from being as bad as the last? Was there more to life after the worst of it was over?

“I’m just saying, the question’s a bit disingenuous,” Jonathan said. “It’s like asking what part of someone they hate most.”

Nancy scoffed. “It is not.”

“Is too! You either have a stupid answer or an honest one, and the honest answers just make you feel worse in two weeks when you give up.”

“Everyone’s got an idea of who they should be,” Steve commented. “I don’t think any answer’s stupid.”

“Be real, how would you feel if my resolution was to smoke more?”

“I’d be fine with it as long as you shared.”

Chrissy couldn’t help her chuckle. “Your boyfriend’s a drug dealer. You don’t have enough?”

“Hey, he’s a former drug dealer, thank you. Besides, no getting high on your own supply.”

Nancy slapped her knee. “Alright, Mr. Philosopher, since you don’t think they’re stupid, what’s yours?”

He thought for a second. “I want to get my own place.”

“That’s what you’re doing with your hush money?”

“If the government put me at risk of demo-rabies, they can buy me a house to make up for it.”

“Please never say that in front of Robin.”

He rolled his eyes. “I’m not that stupid, Nance.”

Chrissy caught the little twitch in Jonathan’s lips. She’d keep that to herself. No need to hurt Steve’s pride.

“I’m going to take an actual vacation this year.” Nancy snuggled deeper into her blanket. “Somewhere warm and sunny and not ready to kill me at any given moment.”

“You would love California,” Jonathan offered. “Come visit me and Argyle this summer.”

“Only if you give me an actual resolution,” she teased.

“Ah, well, Florida it is, then.”

She stuck her tongue out at him before turning her inquisitive gaze on Chrissy. “What’s yours?”

Chrissy took a breath, took in the shimmer of her eye, the soft smile on Jonathan’s lips, the weight of Steve’s arm slung across the back of the couch. She wanted this, as much of it as she could get. She’d never had it before, not when she was trying to be someone she wasn’t.

“I think I want to finally be Chrissy this year.” She let her lips curl around the words, felt the depth seep into her skin and settle in among her scars. She’d live how she wanted, not how Vecna or Jason or her mom or anyone said she should.

Her favorite cousin wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “That’d be a good look on you.”

@thefreakandthehair for the prompt resolutions from the Spicy Six Winter Fanworks Challenge

#spicysixwinterfanworkschallenge #i like to call this group the bi squad #chrissy cunningham #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #jonathan byers #delayed due to illness #but i think more character studies of chrissy are in order #she's so compelling for only one episode of screen time and its a crime we didnt get more #stranger things s4

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fairsexynasty · 9 months

Text

—DIFFICULT THINGS

jamie tartt x lasso!reader

ONE. TOWNIE

summary: lucy moves to richmond with a memory that doesn’t quite forget what her dad did to her. however, ted is as happy as a goldfish.

warnings: cursing, unlikeable female protagonist, father issues, abandonment issues, resentment

a/n: welcome to this very new series i WILL finish. my love for this show has overtaken my time and i am very excited to be writing this. this chapter is set during “two aces.”

——————

Leonard Cohen once said, “There’s a crack in everything; that’s how the light gets in.” But my world has been infused with the darkest of shadows. Everywhere I search is covered by a dark spot. It seeps into my life from my dreams, nightmares, and memories. I don’t think I was delivered by the hand of God, nor will I be expecting any blessing in the near future. It’s the hope that kills you.

I had that epiphany when I turned seven. No one had ever seen a child so jaded, so self-aware. When I learned that the father I wished for wasn’t that interested in fully being in my life, I accepted it entirely, for what it was worth. He’s popped in and out, coming in as quickly as he leaves, only sticking around for moments he deemed essential to me.

And the worse part is that he’s a good man—a good man with a daughter who felt evil.

I used to wish something terrible would happen to me. A broken collarbone. A car accident. Cancer. If something like that happened to me, I thought he’d return and stay for good.

But those things never happened. I’ve never broken any bones. I’ve never crashed my car into a tree. I’m perfectly healthy. And after all this time, Dad has moved on.

I have a half-brother. Thirteen or fourteen years my junior, it’s disgusting how I’m not too sure about the gap. I’ve never met him, nor do I want to meet him. I envy a child who cannot understand the weight of the word ‘father’ because he’ll always take it for granted.

When I crawl through my memories, I can see Dad crystal clear. He showed up to every one of my birthdays until age sixteen. That’s probably because my brother was old enough to ask and understand why Dad was leaving him. Dad came to my first dance, a father-daughter dance. It was one of the nights I honestly felt pretty. He and I danced the night away, stuffing our faces with candy and desserts and drinking our weight’s worth of soda pop. Dad taught me how to ride a bike. Although it ended with scraping my knees, he helped me up, cleaned my knees, and kissed each one. Dad drove me to my first day of high school. The morning went by quickly, but I can still remember the smile on his face as I waved goodbye to him and walked through the school doors.

I want to be thankful for what I’ve gotten from my dad. But he could have done so much more. Am I not worth the effort?

And it hurts to hate my mother as much as I do.

She could clean up her act for Dad, but once he was on his way home, she’d finally ease into consciousness. We would fight. She’d accuse me of not appreciating her. She’d belittle me and never congratulated me on my accomplishments. She’s manipulative. Controlling. Narcissistic. Evil. I know I’m no good, either. But women like that love confrontation. And she got the best of me every single time.

But I’m a grown woman now. I’m twenty. I have a life. A freedom I’ve never known. I’m trying to be honest, to prove I am everything Mom never thought I’d be. I’m trying to make Dad proud of me. Because everyone else is sure as hell proud of him, he’s Ted Lasso: a simple man with a simple plan who was pulled to spread his kindness in Richmond, England, by coaching their god-awful team. I watched the news with a frown as soon as they announced his new endeavor. If he got a new beginning, why can’t I?

And that’s why I decided to pack up my things and move to England.

I’ve been here before. My mother and I moved around due to her line of work. Whether it was Shanghai, Princeton, Kuala Lumpur, or Rome, I could never call those places home. I feel like Richmond is going to be different. I’m not hopeful. Just curious.

——

The park seems comforting. There appears to be a rhythm that compliments the people. Kids playing soccer, and shops opening for the day.

I sit and watch the world awaken. People pass me by as I sit on the bench, not one of them stopping their routine for me, except one.

lHis greetings were met with responses of “Wanker,” a word I found oddly endearing. He continued down the park trail, saying ‘good morning’ to me mindlessly.

I replied with a deadpan “Wanker,” which surprised him, given my American accent. He turned back, his eyes lighting up in recognition.

“Oh, my lordy-lord,” he muttered, smiling as he said my name, “Lucy.” He looks at me as if I’m a fucking unicorn. His eyes soften, and the smile that always reaches his eyes is suddenly on his face. “ Lucy !” he breathes out as if he’s too scared to say it louder like I’ll run away and leave.

“Hi, Dad.” He pulls me from my seat on the bench and envelops me into the biggest bear hug I’ve ever gotten from him. And those hugs are grizzly and unrelenting.

He lifts me off my feet and holds my head to his shoulder. “Oh, how I love you, Lucy girl. I can’t believe it!”

I groan, feeling slightly embarrassed. "Dad, please put me down. I'm not as tiny as Henry is," I say with a laugh. He puts me down with a smile, but there’s a flash of a solemn look on his face. I guess my mention of Henry has filled him with some semblance of guilt. I can’t tell if that satisfies me or not. "I think you're wondering why I'm here," I say, the false smile still on my face. "And the only reason is because I wanted to see you, Dad. I missed you," I add, trying to perfect the role of the doting daughter, even though it doesn't come naturally.

“Oh, I missed you too, Pumpkin. I’m glad you’re here.” He spots my luggage standing against the bench. “Looks like you’re gonna be visiting for a while, huh?”

I nod slowly, my gaze briefly shifting away. "Yeah, I am. Needed a change of scenery for a while," I admit, hoping he won't probe further into my true reasons for being here.

Dad nods, but I spot him scanning my face for any information I won’t outwardly tell him. Perhaps it’s a parently instinct, or maybe it’s just a Ted Lasso thing. The smile on my face doesn’t falter.

“So, how’s your mom?”

The question hangs in the air, and I can sense the curiosity in his eyes. I clench my jaw and roll my eyes in annoyance. "I really don't want to talk about her right now," I say firmly, hoping to steer the conversation away from a topic I'd rather avoid.

Dad gives me one of those fatherly smiles, understanding my need for privacy but also indicating he'll inquire about it later. "Alright then. How about we get you settled into my place? Don't care if you've found one already. I got you here with me, and you're not going anywhere, missy. I hope that's alright with you," he adds, his face hopeful as he waits for my response.

I acquiesce to his requests. It’s the least I can do. “Sure, Dad. I’d love to.”

He cheers with a fist pump, then wrangles me into yet another bear hug before I tell him he’s crushing my ribs, and he dramatically lets me go with a pout on his face.

I follow him down the streets to his apartment door. We enter, and it’s pretty lovely, yet it feels so hollow. There’s an opened jar of peanut butter on the island. I can tell he radiates joy as we unpack my things into an extra bedroom. I wonder how lonely he’s been without his son and wife.

Yeah. This is the least I can do.

——

After unpacking and settling in, Dad practically begs me to come to Nelson Road with him, and since I’m already feeling a bit guilty, I come along with him.

Upon entering, some guy with a full beard and eyebrows that make him look perpetually constipated looks at me. Well, it’s more of a glare. He walks up to Dad and me, not once taking his eyes off me. I narrow my eyes in response, shooting him a cold glare of my own. “Who the fuck is this? Don’t tell me Rebecca hired another fucking American.” His voice is deep and rumbling and full of snark.

"Seriously, do all British guys walk around with a stick up their ass?" I quip, but my remark falls on deaf ears. I catch the man clenching his jaw at my question. Ah, it seems he doesn't take kindly to being disrespected. One jab at his masculinity, and he's ready to go to war without a second thought.

"Roy Kent, meet my daughter, Lucille," Dad introduces, but I quickly interject, "Lucy to you." I emphasize my preference, not one to stand on formality. "Who the fuck are you, Roy Kent?" I ask, gauging his reaction as he looks between me and my dad, clearly trying to figure something out. I decide to clear the air, "Yeah, my mom isn't Michelle," I clarify, hoping to put any confusion to rest.

Roy's response is a simple "Oh," followed by a grunt as he exits the scene. My dad remains unfazed and carries on, guiding me towards the locker room with his arm casually draped around my shoulder.

"Coach Beard! We've got a new cast member!" Dad announces to the room as we walk out together, seemingly excited to introduce me to his colleagues.

A man with a book and a golf hat turns his chair around and observes us. “Well, well, well. If it isn’t the fussbudget,” he says. “Hello, Lucy. I’m Coach Beard. I’ve heard all about you.”

I can't help but snort at the situation. "That's impossible," I retort with a snarky tone. Coach Beard finds my reaction amusing, letting out a chuckle, while my dad gives a slight frown, but I know a few jabs won't easily rattle him.

Suddenly, a strong voice breaks the chatter, announcing, "Ayo, the gaffer's got another kid!" The rest of the men turn their attention to me, their eyes filled with wonder and intrigue. They excitedly chat, asking if they saw what they think they did.

Exiting the office, we step into the open room where my dad proudly introduces me to the team. "Fellas, I'd like to introduce you to my daughter. This is Lucy, everyone."

The players greet me with waves and hellos, except for one guy sitting on the bench, engrossed in his phone, occasionally laughing. I point him out, asking, "Who's that?"

"Jamie Tartt. Hey, Beard, what's the deal with Jamie?" my dad inquires, and seemingly out of nowhere, Jamie appears beside us without making a sound.

Beard responds, "Says he can't practice today. Says he's hurt."

I observe my dad's face dropping with disappointment as he turns to walk out the door and over to Jamie, concern etched across his features.

The whole situation was intense, and I couldn't recall ever seeing my father this angry before. It seemed like there had never been an opportunity for him to get this worked up until now. Watching him unleash his frustration on Jamie reminded me of my mom, who had her share of heated moments. While my dad appeared to be justified in his outburst, Jamie's disrespectful behavior only reinforced my 'British men suck shit' theory.

Feeling overwhelmed, a tingling sensation crept into my head, and my heart raced with the familiar signs of an impending panic attack. I needed to escape, so I swiftly turned on my heel and walked out of the office, trying to distract myself by fiddling with the rings on my fingers.

Wandering aimlessly down the halls, I searched for a private space to catch my breath and calm down. Passing a laughing man, a short guy carrying a laundry bag, and a stunning blonde woman who seemed out of place here, I stopped in my tracks when I heard my dad's name mentioned in a hushed conversation.

"Rebecca, I don't think Coach Lasso will be too thrilled about you trading Jamie away.”

“Higgins, listen to me. I don't care if Lasso is trying to get through to Jamie or if he begs him to come back. Jamie is not returning, and that's precisely what I need," she asserts before abruptly changing the subject, "Now, let me go hunt down my biscuits. They're late."

Realization hits me like a ton of bricks. Dad is being sabotaged. All this time, I believed he was here to make a positive impact on the team, but it turns out they see him as nothing more than a joke. Stepping away from the door, I attempt to make a quick exit, only to collide with a statuesque woman who towers over me.

She glances down at me, exuding power through her stature and fashion, but I'm not intimidated. "Why, hello there, whoever you are. Are you lost?" she inquires.

Ah, this must be Rebecca. The woman who plans to screw my father over. I can't help but roll my eyes at her. "No. Just looking for the bathroom," I retort.

Rebecca gestures towards the sign, displaying her passive-aggressiveness. "Well, it's just around the corner. Right where the 'bathroom' sign is," she points out.

"Cool," I respond nonchalantly, not letting her faze me. "Oh, and by the way, my name's Lucy. Thanks for hiring my dad to coach!"

I catch a flicker of terror in Rebecca's eyes before I walk away, grinning to myself. Drama seems to follow me wherever I go, even in Richmond. Old habits die hard, I suppose.

——

After my quick trip to the loo, I wander over to the dog track, where Dad and Beard stand, closely observing the team's training session. I can't help but chuckle at Jamie's predicament as he wears a penny and sets up cones.

Dad notices my arrival and playfully calls out, "Oh, there you are, Waldo! What were you doing?"

His attempts at humor fail to catch me off guard. While I understand his references, I refuse to engage in the corniness. "Nothing, just using the bathroom," I reply with a mischievous grin, not willing to spill the beans about Rebecca's scheming ways. "Oh, and I met Rebecca. She seems nice," I lie sarcastically, well aware of her conniving nature.

Before Dad can respond, a rather handsome player approaches us gracefully. "Hello there. Sorry, Coach Lasso, but I couldn't continue practice without introducing myself to our guest," he says with a charming smile. "My name is Sam Obisanya. It's a pleasure to meet you, Lucy. The other players and I were wondering if you'd care to join us on the field for a few minutes. We'd like to have some fun at Jamie's expense. Is that alright?"

I return Sam's smile and reply, "Uh, sure. But I haven't played in years, dude. Not sure I'll be any good among you professionals.”

Sam brushes off my concerns, reassuring me, "Oh, that's alright, Lucy. I'm sure Thierry will let you score a couple of goals. Come on!" With that, he guides me towards the field, announcing to the team, "She said yes, you guys!" Their enthusiastic cheers fill the air.

As we assemble for a quick game, a guy with a buzzed fade named Isaac addresses me, confirming my name, "Alright, Lucy, is it?" I nod, and he explains the teams, "We're gonna split into five and five, and you're gonna play with the lads who ain't got a kit on."

"Sounds good," I respond with enthusiasm. I turn to the guys without kits, and each extends a hand for a handshake. I go down the line, shaking hands with each one. There's a short man with curly hair, Bumbercatch, followed by a tall fellow with a broad smile, Jan Maas. Then, a highly energetic man named Dani Rojas greets me, not wasting any time to exclaim, "Football is life!" right in front of me. The last guy, a mousey brunette named Colin, completes the line-up.

Quickly getting into formation with my newfound teammates, they place me front and center for the play. I'm facing off with Sam, who gives me a friendly smile. At the sound of the whistle, we both dash for the ball, but I swiftly take control and dribble it down the field. Roy Kent charges towards me, determined to tackle the ball away, but I outmaneuver him with a quick juke, causing him to land on his ass. The guys react with astonishment, and suddenly, the game shifts from Sam's gentle start to full intensity.

Isaac rushes towards me, sporting a determined expression, but I pass the ball to Dani Rojas, who's open and ready. Dani drives it down the field, but as soon as he spots an opportunity, he passes it back to me. With precision, I shoot the ball into the goal, leaving the goalkeeper stunned as it whizzes past him.

The entire team stands in complete silence, including my dad and Coach Beard, who are both staring at me with their mouths agape. The momentary hush is broken by Jamie Tartt, who teasingly remarks, "Ay, wanker's kid just got you real good, lads." He winks at me, provoking a gag from me followed by a flip-off.

Isaac can't contain his excitement, exclaiming, "Shit, bruv! You just broke Roy Kent's ankles!"

Roy growls behind me, clearly not pleased with being outplayed. "You got fucking lucky, kid," he grumbles.

I don't back down, confidently replying, "Luck's got nothing to do with it. Either you're cursed or you just ate shit, Kent."

I have to admit, Richmond has exceeded my expectations thus far, but I won't let it get the best of me just yet.

#fairsexynasty #ted lasso x reader #jamie tartt x reader #jamie tartt x ofc #ted lasso fanfiction

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hatsunevitu · 11 months

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i have a REALLY big soft spot for the trope when character A sees good sides in character B even when nobody else does

and it’s so kyman like. really.

and i’m really sorry for this post ‘cause it’s very messy and i’m not good with words but i have so many thoughts about this–

when kyle starts to see some good sides of eric cartman it confuses him so much because he physically can’t believe cartman can have something nice deep inside. like, kyle sees how cartman suddenly cares a lot about cats and can defend them even when he won’t get any profit from that. or how sometimes cartman actually does good things and nobody seems to notice that? like in s10e2 “smug alert” when cartman risks himself to save kyle. i strongly hc that kyle learns about it from butters about a month after this all happened and he’s so shocked by that ‘cause he can’t even explain to himself why cartman would do that. and he’s starting to see more and more remotely positive things about cartman (especially since cartman’s taking his medication) and it surprises him how nobody ever praises him for that. or for anything, actually. it’s like they refuse to admit that cartman can be, well, not a devil himself.

and kyle’s starting to overthink it, so he goes to stan and starts asking him about cartman, about his personality and his good traits, and how nobody notices them, but stan doesn’t even listen. he just laughs and says that anything “good” cartman does he does for his own benefit and that he always has ulterior motives. and kyle feels this unfairness because yes, he agrees, cartman’s an asshole and it’s natural that all his friends hate him but HEY everyone deserves to be judged fairly. and as far as he can see – people don’t even try to give him a second chance. and, moreover, what’s worse – cartman doesn’t give himself second chance either.

i mean, actually, if you think about it a bit, you can notice how cartman never denies that he’s a shitty person. he knows he’s terrible, he knows he’s hated by most of the people he has met, and he knows that nobody expects anything good from him. so he doesn’t expect anything good from himself either. he just goes along with everyone’s judgement like “yep. i do not deserve good treatment because i do terrible things and hurt people all the time”. he can be dramatic and self-defensive sometimes, but actually you can see how he actually doesn’t believe in the second chance for himself.

and it confuses kyle. so much. and he really decides that it’s his new mission to prove cartman he can change and he can deserve second chance and good attitude from others. because what? because kyle just loves two things: saving and helping those in need (especially when it’s cartman) and proving other people wrong.

so, yep, it’s basically an au where as time passes children in south park start avoiding cartman because they’ve had enough of him and they’re really sick of his terrible personality. they don’t purposefully ignore him, just pay much less attention, and cartman (who has started to take medication that helps him with his mental state) tries to fight it at first and somehow accidentally hurts (not physically) stan and some other kids reaaaally bad while this, so eventually he just accepts that he’s not gonna be a part of friends group anymore. and he admits that, well, he saw it coming. his meds make him much calmer and melancholic, so he doesn’t even make a scene. he just sits at his house more and more often, skipping school to avoid his classmates. and while stan and kenny get over losing their close friend, kyle can’t. he grew closer to cartman because he really wants to save him. and – to his own surprise – he doesn’t feel like cartman deserves this loneliness.

and, well, sometimes stan and kyle have this kind of dialogue, when kyle (unsuccessfully) tries to change stan’s opinion on cartman.

stan: Dude, Cartman can’t go, he’ll ruin the whole party! Nobody will come if he’s there!

kyle: Well, it’s just… I know he’s an asshole and we hate him but don’t you think it’s a little too… harsh?

stan: “Harsh”? Kyle, we’re talking about Eric Cartman.

kyle: I know! It’s just… everyone will come, we can’t just ignore him, can we?

stan: We totally can. Remember how many times he spoiled parties just because he got bored?

kyle: Uh… You’re right… Sorry, I was just a bit… confused, I guess.

stan: That’s fine, dude. I’m always here to remind you of how much of a prick he is.

kyle: Huh, thanks…

and he realises that he doesn’t hate cartman as much as he did. because, really, kyle’s first reaction to seeing a person getting so much hatred and contempt is being defensive and trying to protect that person. and he feels, like, really bad for cartman, so he goes to his place to hang out together. and it’s like, well:

kyle: Don’t you feel bad when everyone there are having fun without you?

cartman: Yeah, it kinda sucks but it’s not like I can do something about it.

kyle: So what? You’re just gonna stay at home for months talking to nobody but me and Butters?

cartman: That was my plan, right. It’s not that bad anyway.

kyle: Two days ago you said you can’t spend too much time with me or you “get infected with jewishness”.

cartman: I became immune to it.

kyle: *laughs* Well, it’s not like I mind it too much as well.

cartman: You know, that’s the part that bothers me.

kyle: Huh?

cartman: Why are you here, spending you weekend with me instead of helping Stan with his party?

kyle, shrugging: Not really into parties. Besides, I didn’t expect it but you’re not the worst company, you know.

cartman: Oh, come on.

kyle: What?

cartman: Stop making fake compliments to make me feel better, jew.

kyle: What do you mean “fake”?

cartman: I know you’re only doing this because you don’t want me to be alone.

kyle: What?

cartman: Well, you know, your terrible saviour complex? When you see a pathetic lonely person and you just have to come and save him so you can feel better about yourself and feed your ego?

kyle: What the fuck are you even talking about?? Do you really think I’m here only because I pity you?

cartman: Why else would you be here?

kyle: Oh my god, can’t believe I actually thought we were getting along while you just assumed I was having ulterior motives!

cartman: So you claim you wasn’t and it was all sincere?

kyle, offended: Yes!!

cartman: …Nah. Unconvincing, Kahl, work on your acting skills, would ya?

kyle: You know what? Fuck you. I just… I can’t even…

cartman: Oh, finally, good ol’ Kahl is back here.

kyle, slamming the door on his way out: UGH.

and so kyle leaves and ofc he’s irritated and annoyed and angry, but the thing that bothers him so much is that cartman didn’t seem to actually believe someone would really hang out with him now without having ulterior motives. and it warms kyle’s heart and it starts over again and again – kyle getting closer to cartman and realising how lonely he really is all the time.

and, well. he ends up catching himself defending cartman in front of their classmates and choosing him over them. and then, you know, a typical slowburn fanfic for 100k words :D

so, yeah, i don’t know if someone will actually read it until the end, but, uh, i love this scenario when eric actually becomes a better person just for kyle – because kyle is (surprisingly) the only one to even believe that cartman can be better. and eric appreciates that.

#south park #sp #eric cartman #kyle broflovski #kyman #sp kyman #kyle x cartman #cartyle #kyman headcanon #kyman au #sp cartman #sp kyle

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heliads · 2 years

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Hi, I was wondering if it would be alright if i could request a peter pan x female reader with the prompts 1 & 5? Congrats on 5k btw !

ty! and it is most certainly alright

masterlist

On Neverland, favors are worth their weight in gold. If you can’t step foot off of the island, you have to make what you do on its shores count, and that means making your own utility higher than anyone else’s. Power is played back and forth like a round of cards, and if you’re not careful, you’ll end up on the bottom.

You’ve been at this game for quite some time now, and it wouldn’t be too strong a suggestion to say that you’ve learned how to make it your own. No one can make it work quite like you, and they never will.

Still, you do have to admit that having Peter Pan himself ask for your help does come as a surprise. He makes sure to do it as casually as possible, because Peter will never be able to truly deflate his ego long enough to be on the same level as the rest of you, but it is rather satisfying nonetheless.

He asks his favor as simply as he can, late one afternoon when no one else is around. The hour is late, and you’re barely awake yourself. Many of the other Lost Boys have retired for the evening already, trickling out of the campsite in twos and threes as they head for bunks and hammocks and whatever will hold them for the night.

This already lends strength to Peter’s conquest, knowing that no one can hear him other than the two of you. He keeps his eyes fixed on the endless waves of trees as he walks, you by his side. When he finally speaks, his voice is so carefully quiet that you almost don’t hear him, the words carried away by a sudden breeze that is either nature’s best coincidence or Peter’s doing, just like everything else here.

“Seamen will be coming here tomorrow.”

You arch a brow at him. “Pirates, you think? How can you be sure?”

He gestures vaguely towards the darkened sea. “You’ve seen the ship on the horizon, haven’t you? I recognize the sails. They’re a band of traveling merchants, really no better than pirates. I can call them what I will.”

You bite back a grin. “Peter, you hate pirates more than anyone. Try not to pollute the name by assigning it to anyone else.”

Peter gives you an exasperated look. “Perhaps the fact that I’m even comparing these merchants to pirates in the first place should give some indication of their terrible status. They’ve been here a few times before, and every time, it’s an absolute nightmare.”

You can’t deny the fact that you’re intrigued by this. “You’re the closest thing to a walking nightmare I’ve ever met. What could these merchants have that could possibly make your skin crawl?”

Peter shudders violently. “It’s not just the main group. There’s this one girl in their party who seems quite taken with me. Every time I see her, she’s winking or grinning at me. If I didn’t know better, I’d say that she might actually be flirting with me.”

You can’t hold back a laugh. “Try not to sound so disgusted, Peter. I’ve heard that flirting is often taken as a compliment.”

His stare is acidic, although it does absolutely nothing to quell your high spirits. “It’s not a compliment when she’s tracking me throughout the island. I can’t get a moment’s peace when she’s here.”

You nod solemnly, face twitching as you try to keep your composure. “Alright, then. Peter Pan is afraid of people who like him, that’s not much of a surprise.”

Peter glowers at you. “If I knew you were going to be this supportive, I would have complained to Felix instead.”

You refuse to be cowed by this, and instead just fold your arms across your chest. “Why didn’t you talk to Felix, then? You want something from me, don’t you? If it’s murder, I want to at least meet the girl first. I can’t assassinate someone without knowing for sure that they’re a scoundrel. I have my limits.”

Peter grimaces. “As much as I like that plan, I can’t do it. I need the merchants to like us so they can keep drawing in unsuspecting ships. It makes Neverland more exciting, you know? Murdering one of their crew doesn’t exactly win us any points with them.”

You tilt your head to the side, considering this. “I can see why that would be a problem. What’s your plan, then?”

Peter refuses to look you in the eyes as he explains himself. “Well, the way I see it, this girl would only leave me alone if she truly thought she had no chance of convincing me to return her feelings. I would need something obvious, something like me having feelings for someone else. Feelings that were returned, of course. I would never be caught dead pining for someone like a simpleton.”

You’re confused for a moment, and then you begin to put together the pieces. Peter’s obvious embarrassment to ask something of you. The one thing that could convince a serial flirter that someone is off the table.

A delighted laugh bursts from you before you can stop yourself. “You want me to be your fake girlfriend?”

Peter groans. “Don’t seem so pleased with yourself, I wouldn’t be doing it if it wasn’t a last resort. I have no choice. If I see that girl batting her eyelashes at me one more time, I’ll gouge out my corneas.”

You grin wickedly. “Say all you want, Peter. I’m just trying to appreciate this moment.”

He swats you on the shoulder. “Appreciate it when I’m not here. So? Will you do it or not?”

You let him suffer in silence a second longer, then nod. “Of course I’ll do it. Like there was a chance that I wouldn’t. This is much too fun to ever pass up.”

Peter seems to encounter all of his regrets in an instant. “This is a mistake, isn’t it?”

You beam at him. “Of course it is. That’s why it’s going to be so great.”

Peter seems to take some convincing on that front, even though it’s his idea. You couldn’t be happier to see how this pans out. What would it be like to have Peter Pan pretend to be in love? You don’t know that you’ve ever seen him display a stronger emotion than malice in all the time you’ve ever known him.

As it turns out, Peter pretending to be in love doesn’t seem to be all that different from how he normally acts around you. He tips Felix off, just in case, and you swear you hear the scarred boy mumble something like ‘about time’ under his breath as Peter walks away. After that, all you have to do is wait for the merchants’ vessel to anchor on the shores of Neverland, and see whether your plan will be worth it or not.

Although you can’t remember when these merchants last visited Neverland, you immediately understand Peter’s apprehension the second the docking party touches down on your beaches. They’re all vaguely insufferable, ranging on a broad scale to merely impolite to downright vulgar.

You’re honestly grateful for the protection of seeming to be in a relationship with Peter on your own front. The merchants have barely been on the island for ten minutes before one of them is looking you up and down. You don’t think you’ve ever felt more relieved as when Peter appeared out of nowhere to stand by your side, idly taking your hand in his when the staring didn’t stop.

Peter’s merchant girl is there too. You could tell which one she was from the moment she arrived, just judging on the way her face fell when she saw you standing so close to Peter. The sight fills you with an odd amount of vicious joy. Yeah, you want to say. Yeah, it’s me and him. What could you possibly do about it?

Forgetting the fact that all of this is fake, it’s kind of fun to walk around in front of all these people as if you were the one who could convince Peter Pan to fall in love, to feel as if you matter to Peter more than anyone. You think you’ll miss it when this charade ends, that sensation of being more powerful than you have ever known, lighter than air and twice as bright.

Perhaps Peter will miss it too. He seems to maintain the act even when you swear that none of the merchants can see you, just in case they happen to stumble upon you and suspect something otherwise. The two of you used to walk together frequently before the merchants came, but now the outings are longer, and often end in both of you just sitting together, enjoying the company of being alone with someone important to you.

It makes you laugh to think of how little you had before all this. The merchants end up staying for a week and a half, and you don’t know that any ten days have ever been sweeter, even in all the decades you’ve spent never growing old on Neverland. The thought of this ending, of going from having everything to having nothing at all, makes you want to sink the merchants’ ship or do something to keep them there just a little longer. At least then the act could stretch further out into forever.

The end comes, of course, just as you knew it always would. You and the rest of the Lost Boys bid a not so tearful farewell to the merchants at the end of ten days’ time, and you stand on a rocky cliff watching their vessel disappear into a grainy speck on an endless blue horizon.

Then, and only then, do you retreat back into the emerald depths of the forest. You tell yourself that you’re not intentionally seeking out Peter, but you find him anyway. Your feet might have always been oriented towards him, constantly trailing after him, never quite close enough to make it all the way by yourself.

Judging by the look of surprise that flits across his face when Peter looks up and finds himself in front of you, though, you might not be the only one prone to wandering in search of someone.

He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly, messing up those same strands of light brown hair that never seem to sit straight. “So, the merchants are gone.”

You nod. “Guess that means you’re free of me.”

Peter chuckles, although his face spams briefly with pain before he manages to control himself again. “Oh, it wasn’t that bad. Honestly, it was kind of fun. I’ve had plenty of time to explore every possible kind of life choice, but never that one.”

“Well,” you hesitate, “if you ever need a fake girlfriend again, know that I’m here. I think we work together marvelously. I’ve never heard a lie that felt so real.”

Peter almost winces. “What if it wasn’t a lie?”

Your gaze jerks up to him. “What?”

He can’t seem to look you in the eyes. “What if it wasn’t a lie?” He repeats, “What if it was real? What I felt was real, I know it. Didn’t you feel the same? Wasn’t it better than anything we’d ever had? Is it asking too much to be young and in love, Y/N? Is it asking too much to let me have you like that forever?”

Peter’s voice builds in intensity until he’s practically begging you to answer him. Even still, it takes you a while to collect yourself long enough to say what you will. “It isn’t,” you whisper, “it isn’t too much to ask. Not to me. I haven’t wanted anything but this.”

As you say it, you realize that it’s true. Being so close to Peter has made you feel more than you have in quite some time. You don’t want him as a friend again, you want him like this. You want him as someone to love. This or nothing at all.

Peter smiles at last. “It’s settled, then. It’s us against the world.”

Just as it always has been, you think. Just as it always will be.

peter pan tag list: @lovesanimals0000, @amortensie, @w1shes43, @lost-ender

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binxyu · 1 year

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Part 2: The memories you two had burnt into ash as you threw away the remains of the relationship you had with Jungkook. Jungkook seemed to hate Jimin but everything else about him remained painfully similar. You, on the other hand, grew a mask that dug into your skin so horrendously that no one could recognize you. Neither one of you remembered the other and yet fate seemed to have other plans.

>>Pairing: Jeon Jungkook (dom) x fem!reader (sub) | fuckboy!jk x witch!reader

>>Word Count: 7.7k

>>Genre: Mini Series / Smut & Angst

>>Warnings/Kinks: Arguments, breast play, creampie, fingering, oral (receiving), praise, unprotected sex, witchcraft

>>Author’s Note: Hi guys! It’s been a pretty rough year for me so far and i’m so sorry i’ve been inactive for so long. Life really got in the way but i’m hoping to get back into it slowly. I’ll be working on requests soon and thank you for supporting me! I hope you enjoy this long overdue second part to slow burn and if you enjoy my writing i would really appreciate a tip. Woman in STEM struggling here fr :( Love you guys!

Memories of you swarmed his mind and Jungkook desperately tried to hold onto you as your body turned into ash, flying away from his grasp. Every kiss, every night together, and every study session gone like the wax of the candle you had burnt. He could remember the event but never who it was with.

It was similar for you, like someone had reached their hand inside your skull to rip out every precious memory you had of him. The pain still somehow lingered even after you had no idea who you were mourning over and witchcraft became a cause of pain to you. Your entire personality had changed overnight. Even Taehyung could only see glimpses of your past self.

Everyone around you remembered what you and Jungkook shared but they just assumed you two broke it off and moved on. Taehyung remained friends with Jungkook but you two never seemed to cross paths.

“Tae, do you know where my lab report papers went?”, you yelled from your bedroom, shoving papers all over the floor as you searched for the damn thing you had been working on for days. The dark circles underneath your eyes were evident from that work. Typically, you’d just pull up the papers on your laptop and print them out again but the papers you were looking for had the peer edits on them you needed to edit it.

“No clue. Maybe ask Namjoon if he has them. You’ve been pretty forgetful lately so maybe you left them the last time you two studied together”, Tae suggested, leaning against the frame of your bedroom door as he watched you. He was eating one of the cookies you had bought the other day when you were stocking up on comfort foods. Midterms were kicking your ass, especially after switching your major to biology.

Taehyung tried to convince you that you never liked those terribly hard advanced math and science classes but you insisted it was a much more practical major in comparison to your theology one. Besides, you couldn’t even stomach the idea of continuing learning religion after your own had hurt you so much.

“Can you take a second to breathe? Damn woman”, Tae huffed, shoving the last bit of cookie into his mouth and swallowing it in what looks to be a single chew before he’s walking over to you. There’s sweat dripping down your forehead and your hands are shaking in sheer panic. He’s never seen you so miserable before.

“Tae, I need to get this done. If I don’t find those damn papers I’m done for”, even you were aware you sounded more than a little dramatic but it did feel like the end of the world. Tae just nodded and rubbed your shoulders, trying to get even a smidge of the worked up tension out of you.

“Okay okay. I’ll call Namjoon and if he doesn’t know where it is then I’ll help you look for it”, you finally nodded and sat down on your bed, waiting for Tae to call your friend. His phone barely rang once before Namjoon picked up, his voice on speaker so that you could listen to it.

“Hey Nam, do you happen to have Bae’s lab report? She’s freaking out and needs it tonight”, you had no idea where Tae got the idea of Bae for your nickname as it was a recent development. He said you were the “Bae to his Tae” which you said was stupid but he just waved you off and it stuck.

“Oh, let me look. Maybe I accidentally grabbed it”, you could hear Namjoon shuffling through his backpack. Your hands were clasped so tightly together that your fingers were turning red.

“Here it is! I’ll bring it right over. Sorry about that”, you let out the loudest sigh of relief you’ve ever had. Tae laughed and thanked Namjoon before hanging up. He looked at you and then around your room, still disappointed at how barren it looked without all your candles, crystals, and collectibles. They were pretty and brightened the room up.

Now it was just a dull white room with a dull black bed and desk. No color.

“See? You need to stop freaking out. It’s bad for you”, Tae ruffled your hair and his boxy grin filled up your view. You despised that grin. Not because it wasn’t cute because it was. It’s because that grin held so much mischief and trouble behind it.

“Stop that”, you pushed him away with your hand on his forehead and he stumbled backwards.

“What? I didn’t do anything”, he huffed, crossing his arms like a toddler having a temper tantrum.

“Kim Taehyung. I’m your best friend and I know that grin well”, you glared at him, crossing your arms back as if you were scolding him.

“I was just thinking that after you were done with your report thingy we could go clubbing”, he suggested, puppy dog eyes already at the ready. You quickly averted your gaze.

“Tae, I can’t. I have so many things to do. Midterm week, remember?”, Tae put both of his hands on each of your cheeks and squished them together, making you look at him.

“Sureee but it’s one night. Come on”, Tae nudges you with his shoulder, wiggling his eyebrows playfully to attempt to loosen you up. You finally sighed and nodded your head.

“Help me edit this paper and I’ll go with you”, he nods enthusiastically and grabs the papers out of your hands, running to your desk to begin helping you edit. You couldn’t help but laugh and soon enough the night came.

Jungkook showed up to the club with yet another bruise purpling his cheek, replacing the one that had just freshly healed. Yet another fight to add to the list Jimin had made up in his mind. The lit cigarette in Jungkook’s hand was something he never imagined to see considering how important his ex-friend had considered his health before.

Jimin watched as Jungkook settled into one of the seats, elbows on his knees as he took a puff from the cigarette. He took a deep inhale of it, let it settle into his chest, and then blew it out. He had new tats all up his right arm, an eyebrow piercing, and a lip piercing. If Jimin was still his friend then he’d tell him how proud he was.

Jimin finally looked away when Jungkook finished smoking, throwing the cigarette to the ground and stepping on it with his black boots. The fire went out and he picked it up to put in the trash next to the seat he was in. He looked completely different and acted so differently.

A woman seemed to notice those differences too as she approached Jungkook in a red dress that was skin tight, showing off every curve. She quite literally fell into his lap, arms wrapping around his neck as if they had known each other for years. Like this was instinct.

Soon enough, they were making out on the couch. Jungkook’s big tattooed hands holding her face as she started to grind against his thigh. It was so inappropriate that you had to avert your eyes as soon as you saw it.

“Ew, Tae I already want to leave”, you were going to cut off your best friend’s circulation if you kept up the tight grip you had on his arm. It was like you thought he was going to disappear any moment.

“Bae, you can let go of my arm now. No one is going to eat you alive”, Tae laughed and you finally loosened your grip when you noticed his skin was turning red. Taehyung didn’t even question the fact that you didn’t bring up Jungkook. He just assumed seeing him makeout with someone else was too much to talk about.

“Whatever. Can we dance now?”, you weren’t a total debbie downer and Tae knew that as he guided you to the dance floor, immediately starting to dance along with you. The rose quartz necklace you always wore bounced against your chest as you swayed and jumped along with the music. It was the first time in ages that Taehyung could say you looked happy.

He wasn’t the only one to notice.

From his spot on the couch, Jungkook couldn’t keep his eyes off that very same necklace. His hands were on the woman on his lap but his eyes were on you. Something seemed to keep his gaze trapped as he watched the sweat go down your face as your eyes closed. You were stunning and felt so familiar but he couldn’t place why his body called for you.

There was a woman just as beautiful on his lap currently, ready to abide by his every wish and command and, yet, he wanted you. His head tilted as he tried to find a reason for it until finally the woman kissing his neck realized his hands had stopped moving along her thighs.

“Hey, what are you looking at?”, she asked, getting off of him to stand in front of him, hands placed firmly on her hips.

“Sorry sweetheart, I think I’ve changed my mind”, he gave a half-hearted smile and she scoffed before walking away, looking for another man to seduce for the night. He couldn’t blame her. Sex was fun.

“Tae, don’t you dare leave me”, by the time you had opened your eyes to reality, you noticed that your best friend was dancing with another girl. He gave an innocent boxy grin to you and you knew you were doomed for a lonely night on the dance floor. You shook your head but waved him along and he went to dance with her, hands placed on her hips.

You knew it was bound to happen considering this is what always happens when Tae takes you clubbing.

You were about to walk away to the bar when you felt someone close to your back, stopping you in your tracks before the person tapped your shoulder. You turned around to see the guy from the couch towering over you. Now that you were closer to him, you could see the tattoos crawling up his arm. From the brief look you had, you could make out an eye, some words, and multiple shapes on his hands.

“Can I help you?”, you raised an eyebrow, immediately crossing your arms to look more guarded. You had to stop the little habit you had developed where you death gripped the necklace around your neck when you were anxious. The gaze of the man in front of you had made you feel small and it was unwelcomed.

“I was wondering if you were free tonight, princess”, something crawled up your spine when he said princess.

“Sorry, I don’t do that”, you shook your head, knowing he just wanted to have sex with you. You had to admit that he was attractive but you knew your worth despite how desperate you were for some affection. Being a woman in STEM was rough for sure.

“Aw, what a pity. That’s okay. I just want you to know you’re gorgeous”, he smiled and your heart skipped a beat, your arms involuntarily falling to your side. He had two bandages on his forehead, covering what looked to be a massive scar. The bruise on his cheek didn’t help hide his devilish demeanor either but yet his eyes screamed playful and innocent like an angel. He’s definitely dangerous and you shouldn’t be near him.

He was about to turn around and your brain screamed at you not to but your hand seemed to grab his arm before you could convince yourself otherwise. It felt like hands were gripping your body, holding you in place as he spun back around to look at you again. It was such a foreign feeling to not have control over yourself and you almost thought of a supernatural reason before you shut that down.

“What’s your name?”, you looked up at him, still holding onto his arm. He smirked and leaned down so you could hear him better over the blasting music, coming face to face with you.

“Jungkook”, he gently removed your hand from his arm and kissed it, raising an eyebrow as you repeated the name in what looked like a trance.

“Jungkook. Okay”, you nodded and he chuckled, looking down at your lips and he bit his own. Jungkook looked like it was ripping him apart not to touch you.

“Oh, hey Jungkook”, you felt the arm of your best friend land on your shoulders before you heard him. No girl in sight with him and you would have to remember to ask him what happened with her.

“Hey Taehyung, what brings you here?”, Jungkook looks irritated that he was interrupted but smiles at your friend nonetheless. You were beyond confused on how the two knew each other.

“___ needed a night out, so I brought her here”, Taehyung gestured with his head down to you and Jungkook looked down at you again.

“Yeah, and we were just leaving”, you smiled at Jungkook and grabbed Tae’s hands to drag him out of the club. If you stayed under that man’s hungry gaze any longer then you might’ve ripped his clothes off instead.

“You literally introduced us to each other, Bae”, Taehyung rubbed his eyes, obviously too sleepy to deal with your shit. It was the morning after you two had gone clubbing and your best friend was half asleep at your kitchen table. He was waiting for breakfast, eyes half closed as he leaned his chin against his hand.

“But I’m telling you I don’t know him”, of course you had to ask about Jungkook considering he was the most handsome man you had ever seen. Bruises and all.

“Well, I’m telling you you do. You two were disgustingly in love at one point”, Taehyung fake vomited and got up to take the spatula from you. Obviously he was just joking with you cause you had no recollection of the tattooed stranger. But, as you watched Tae sleepily flip the pancakes, you wondered why you did find him so familiar.

“Whatever you say. I have to go to the chem lab now”, you laughed and slung your backpack over your back. Taehyung turned to look at you and sighed before flicking the rose quartz around your neck, causing it to sway.

“Where do you think the necklace came from? It certainly didn’t just randomly manifest on your doorstep”, he turned back to the stove and your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. You didn’t have time to process what he said before you were out the door heading to your lab. You couldn’t afford to be late over a man you barely know.

Lab seemed the same as usual. You grabbed the safety goggles you had to wear every time before you walked over to your table, setting up your laptop, a calculator, and some paper in case you had to show work. Time passed by as you waited for the class to start and your lab partner never showed up.

Your TA came over and raised an eyebrow to which you responded with a simple shrug. You really didn’t want to have to do this lab alone.

“Jungkook, since your partner also isn’t here then you can partner with ___ today”, your TA called out to a man on the other side of the room. Your jaw almost dropped when it was the same Jungkook from the club that stepped out from behind another table and walked over. He somehow even pulled off the goofy looking safety goggles.

“Long time no see ___”, Jungkook chuckled, getting some gloves out of the box set up at your table. He rolled up the sleeves of his sweater, revealing the ink that you had briefly scanned over the night prior. Talk about mouthwatering.

“Yeah, guess fate really does exist”, you pull the gloves onto your hands before you start looking over the instructions for the lab. You were trying so hard to ignore the stare that was obviously coming from your lab partner.

“Are you going to start the experiment or just stare at me the whole time?”, one thing you were not going to play with is your grade.

“Not sure. Are you going to give me your number?”, he raised an eyebrow at you, obviously not kidding. How annoying.

“Seriously? Just do the damn work”, you huffed in annoyance. You already had a massive headache and this playboy was not making it any better.

“Taehyung said you needed to destress. I can help with that”, he suggested and you couldn’t help but scoff as you poured the solution into the well.

“Really? Cause, at the moment, you’re just causing more of it”, you shook your head and shoved the instructions in his direction, “turn on the computer”. He did as you asked as slow as possible just to irritate you.

“That could change if you give me your number”, you could tell he would’ve backed down if you told him to but you didn’t know if you wanted him to.

“Fine”, you sighed and held your hand out. Jungkook grinned and placed his phone into your hand, watching as you reluctantly put your number in there.

“Sweet, now watch me finish this in thirty minutes tops, sourpuss”, he confidently said once he had his phone back and you shook your head as another chill went up your spine. It was like a ghost’s finger was tracing it.

“Bet”, you stated before you solely focused on the experiment.

Jungkook was like an irritating candle that wouldn’t go out. You kept trying to extinguish that flame he seemed to have for you with no luck. The wick kept relighting itself and it seemed he wouldn’t give up on you. You couldn’t tell if you were just his next sex target or if he genuinely wanted to know you. Probably the former.

It finally got to the point that you resorted back to your tarot cards, something that you swore you’d never use again. You’d only do it once for some clarity and you’d throw the damn things away.

As you shuffled the deck, you felt some of your stress naturally melt away. You pictured Jungkook in your head as you shuffled them, waiting for some cards to fly out. You expected it to naturally take a while since you haven’t used the cards but three cards immediately fell out of the stack.

You laid them out and put the other cards to the side. What stared back at you was the lovers reversed, the high priestess reversed, and the wheel of fortune. You scratched your head as you looked at them, wondering why those were the ones to fall out. It’s like your brain was clouded as you tried to place them together.

The lovers reversed was for the loss of a lover that you can’t seem to remember and the high priestess reversed is the loss of an inner voice which is likely your connection to your religion. At least one makes sense. But, as you stare at the wheel of fortune, you’re baffled even more. Fate.

It couldn’t be a coincidence, right? You and Jungkook had just talked about fate in your lab the other day.

“Oh, fuck you. Just confusing me more. What do the lovers reversed have to do with him?”, you rested your forehead against the table as another throbbing headache started to form. You couldn’t tell if it was from the Jungkook situation, the lack of sleep, water, and food, or stress.

You have an inkling that you gave up witchcraft for a reason tied to that lovers card but you didn’t want to cause the headache to worsen by thinking about it.

“Any leads there detective?”, you stood straight up just to see Namjoon standing in your doorway. His eyes scanned the cards spread out on your desk and he almost smiled before you quickly started putting them away.

“Not really. I got the lovers reversed and I have no idea why”, Namjoon didn’t really know the meaning of the card but if he did then he would definitely have the answer to why you got it.

“You’ll figure it out. I’m sure”, he smiled half-heartedly as he leaned against the door frame. He and Taehyung were about to work together on Namjoon’s latest newspaper article.

“Thanks, Nam”, you smiled at him before you grabbed your bag and stood up from your desk chair.

“Where are you heading?”, Namjoon tilted his head, moving out of your way as you left your bedroom.

“To the library. I’m going to do some investigating”, you smiled at him before leaving the apartment, closing the door behind you. You could only hope that he and Tae wouldn’t destroy the place while you were gone.

The walk to the library always felt weird to you, your feet dragging behind you as if the world didn’t want you to go. You couldn’t really listen to that instinct though considering you couldn’t really focus in your room on schoolwork. Plus, the library has always been a safe place for you.

The door creaked as you pushed it open, revealing the familiar layout of books in front of you stacked neatly on each shelf. You really didn’t want to go to the section you needed to go to for answers but you allowed your feet to naturally lead you there.

The words “THEOLOGY” stared back at you as if to taunt you. You let out a huff and suddenly a splitting headache erupted, causing you to grip your head as the horrendous pain engulfed it. Rumbling began to fill your ears and you looked up to see the bookshelves under the sign shaking horribly, books falling onto the ground. You blinked and they stopped moving, as if it had never happened to begin with.

The headache went away just the same but one of the books that had fallen caught your eye at the bottom of the bookshelf. It was simply titled “love magick” in bright pink, standing out against its solid black cover. It looked old, dust layering it and, as you picked it up to inspect it, most of the dust flew up into the air.

“Sourpuss? What are you doing here?”, fate really did like to fuck you over, didn’t it?

“Oh, nothing”, you quickly hid the book into your arm, hiding the cover as unsuspiciously as you could, “just doing some research for a paper”.

“Well, that’s boring. Want to know what is not boring though?”, Jungkook raised an eyebrow as he stepped closer to you, causing you to subconsciously step back until your back was against the bookcase behind you. The scene felt oddly familiar. Something was holding you in place as Jungkook finally stopped in front of you, chest pressed against your own.

“Do I even want to know?”, you tried to sound confident but your voice came out shaky.

“You”, your face twisted into confusion as a Jungkook that looked much younger than the one in front of you flashed inside your head saying the very same thing. Jungkook couldn’t understand why you suddenly dropped your book and shook your head, trying to think of a reason. You didn’t even know Jungkook back then, so how did you know what he looked like?

“What’s wrong?”, he looked down to see the book you had dropped, about to crouch down to get it but he read the title before he did.

“Why are you reading about love magick?”, Jungkook tilted his head and finally crouched down to pick up the book, turning it around in his hands to figure out why you would want such a thing. “That’s an odd research topic for a STEM major”.

“I have a humanities class, idiot”, you scoffed, quickly trying to come with an excuse. You reached out to grab the book back but Jungkook held it high enough out of your reach.

“Really? Cause it would make a lot of sense why I feel this pull to you if you’ve been doing some kind of love spell on me”, you felt almost offended that he could think such a thing and your patience hit an all time low.

“That is not what’s happening, Jungkook! I don’t understand the pull either. Yes, I practiced witchcraft before but I gave it up. I just wanted to find answers”, you sighed, trying to take deep breaths between words. Jungkook looked confused, slowly lowering the book back down and you grabbed it from his grasps to hold it close to your chest.

“Why’d you give it up?”, he was talking to you but you noticed his eyes were set on the crystal around your neck, the bright pink reflecting in his brown eyes. You tried to find an answer to his question but couldn’t find one just like you couldn’t give an answer to Taehyung when he asked. You just threw your stuff out with no explanation.

“I don’t know. It just felt wrong to do it. Like it ripped something away from me”, you shrugged, opening the book to start flipping through the pages.

“Do you think you did something to me?”, he raised an eyebrow, watching the pages with you and he could barely see the recipes on the paper due to all the words filling them. Warnings, rules, and everything else under the moon seemed to be written in there. Jungkook had no idea how you could read that stuff.

“I’m not sure but it could explain why Taehyung seems to think we knew each other before. I just don’t know why I would do such a thing”, Jungkook finally got fed up with the crystal swaying back and forth, distracting him and he grabbed the damn thing to stop it. You tried to jump back from the sudden contact just for the bookcase to stop you in your tracks.

He seemed to freeze in place, hand tightly grasping the rose quartz. The memories seemed to rise from the dead, building up from the ash inside his brain. You were just staring at him with wide eyes as his cold eyes slowly started to well up with tears. You had no idea how you had upsetted him but you just stayed still in fear that you would make it worse.

“Jungkook? Are you okay?”, you looked up at him and his arms slowly wrapped around you, holding you so tight that you thought he would break your ribs.

“I know you don’t remember but just stay still a minute, princess”, Jungkook buried his face into your shoulder, rubbing your back as if he had known you forever.

“O-Okay”, your voice cracked, awkwardly rubbing his back in return. You never thought you would see such a fighter in such a fragile state.

“Ok, princess I need you to hold this”, he pulled back and held up the crystal to you. You didn’t understand considering you had touched that thing multiple times.

“Alright?”, you reached up and touched it with your finger to find that, like you expected, nothing happened.

“Nothing? Hmm, wrap your hand around it”, he gripped your hand and made you grip it just like he had, holding your hand on his own to keep it in place. You felt more from his hand than the necklace.

“Still nothing. What happened, Jungkook?”, you ripped your hand from his, getting a little freaked out from the sudden contact. Jungkook was into you but he never initiated physical contact past the club.

“I remember everything. We did know each other before the club. You’re the reason I know Taehyung”, you couldn’t deny that that checks out considering Taehyung had told you that the morning after the club.

“Really? Then, why can’t I remember?”, you frowned, looking down at the necklace as if it would suddenly work for you.

“You did a bond-breaking spell. The necklace must be connected to why you did it or something, right?”, Jungkook raised an eyebrow and you guessed that also makes sense since Taehyung said Jungkook gave it to you it.

“Listen, I know it’s confusing right now but we’ll figure it out, okay?”, he gently put his hands on your shoulders and you could see the sincerity in his eyes.

“Okay, do you remember anything that I had the night I did the spell?”, you raised an eyebrow, grabbing Jungkook’s hand to drag him out of the library and towards your apartment. You had to have done the spell there considering candles were needed for that spell.

“Not particularly”, you could tell he was deep in thought even though he was staring at you, probably trying to make up for the lost time you two had.

You began to go through the process of a bond-breaking spell in your head. Candles, carve the initials, tie the rope, and burn. Candles, carve the initials, tie the rope, and burn.

“That’s it! Burn!”, you stopped in your tracks, turning to look at Jungkook. He looked even more confused than before.

“You know nothing, do you? I had to burn the candles which means I used a lighter, right?”, you asked as if he could answer and you continued on your way, not even letting him answer before he was being dragged behind you again.

“Taehyung! Do you know where my lighter is?”, you stopped using the thing when you gave up witchcraft since you had no use for it. You had no idea what Tae had done with it after you gave it to him to use. He could use it more than you.

“Uh, why?”, he turned around on the couch along with Namjoon, both of them staring at you and a wide-eyed Jungkook. They looked at each other and then back at you both.

“I think I did a bond-breaking spell on Jungkook and I”, Taehyung just looked at you with a blank stare, having no idea what that meant, “aka I made us forget about each other”. You rolled your eyes.

“Oh, well that explains a lot. Why would you do that though?”, he tilted his head and Namjoon couldn’t help but be curious too. You looked at Jungkook along with them. He looked absolutely guilty.

“You have to listen all the way through cause it is going to sound bad at first”, he gently let go of your hand just in case and you all nodded, staring at him eagerly.

“Jimin and I were obviously close friends before and he dared me to try to take ___ out because he had some weird vendetta against her due to her religion. It started out as a deal when I started to talk to you and when you were tutoring me”, your face scrunched up at the knowledge that you were being played around with. No wonder you did the spell. You had to trust Jungkook though.

“I realized, though, that I really did like spending time with you. You made me a better person and student and I think I made you more confident in your religion which explains why both of those things were stripped away after the spell. Anyways, I only continued talking to Jimin to get the necklace as a gift for you but you overheard us talking and misunderstood. You did the spell before I could explain”, it seemed like Jungkook said it all in one breath but you understood enough for relief to flood through you. Your hand instinctively held onto the necklace.

“Wow, that’s a lot”, Namjoon blinked a few times like his brain couldn’t keep up with all the information.

“Yeah, for real. Now, let me try to remember where I put that lighter”, Tae jumped up and started rummaging through drawers in your kitchen. You couldn’t focus much on him though with all the information that was just thrown at you.

“Found it!”, it had probably been after a few minutes of you and Jungkook just staring at each other before Taehyung ran over with the white lighter in his hands. He stopped and held it out to you like it was a fragile item.

“Thank you. Hopefully this works”, you smiled weakly at Jungkook and he smiled back, trying to offer some courage. You finally picked up the lighter, warmth flooding into your hands and up your arms before your own memories started to reappear. Jungkook held onto you as you started to become overwhelmed, shaking where you stood. The feeling you had before the spell came flooding back.

Your heart begged for Jungkook just like your body did before.

You pressed your cheek against Jungkook’s chest, gently punching him with your fist over and over again.

“You’re such an asshole”, you mumbled and he laughed, wrapping his arms around you. His chin ended up on top of your head.

“How am I the asshole?”.

“For not just asking me to be your girlfriend in a normal way”, you sighed, knowing that all of this could have been avoided.

“I’m sorry”, Jungkook’s heart swelled as he kept reliving all of your memories together in his head. He gently ushered with his head for Taehyung and Namjoon to leave and they nodded, gathering their belongings before heading out the door.

“For importantly, though, change your major back to theology. You’re miserable, princess”, you raised your head to look at him, an eyebrow raised.

“Your makeup doesn’t really hide the eyebags”, he smiled apologetically, trying to explain how he knew as best as he could.

“Yeah, I know. I’ll change back”, you smiled, just staring up at what you now know is someone meant to be in your life.

“Good cause I was definitely prepared to take your calculator or something if I needed to”, Jungkook smiled and you didn’t respond, too lost in the memories that didn’t seem to stop. Some were much more distracting than others.

And Jungkook certainly wasn’t helping when one of his fingers was absentmindedly circling your hip bone under your shirt, the fabric having risen up a bit.

“Jungkook”, his eyes moved to follow you as you looked up at him, his finger never stopping the shapes he was drawing unknowingly. He seemed so lost in thought that he barely registered that you were leaning up to kiss him.

“Jungkook, baby, I can’t reach”, your hands cupped his cheeks and he finally snapped out of his trance, looking at you below him. You really couldn’t because of how tall he was, especially since he was wearing boots.

“Oh, sorry princess”, he chuckled and finally leaned down to mesh your lips together, electricity sparking through you both and his hands traveled higher up to your rib cage. Your body shivered in response, moaning into his mouth. Jungkook pulled back in shock, wondering what could have elicited such a response.

“Don’t look at me like that. It’s been a while”, you pouted and he just smiled, continuing to make shapes in your skin.

“I think this time I should make sure you never forget me”, he grinned and leaned down to cup the backs of your thighs with his hands, lifting you up effortlessly. Almost naturally, your legs wrapped around his waist.

“How do you plan on doing that?”, you run your fingers through his black hair, realizing it was much longer than before. You liked how curly it had become with the length.

“Well, if you will allow it, I want to treat you right this time”, Jungkook kissed the tip of your nose and you couldn’t help but nod. You had never seen such a sweet side to him and you were curious what that could be like in the bedroom. Especially considering you had not hooked up with anyone else after him.

“Please, Jungkook. But, I need you to know I haven’t done it since then”, he nodded and laid you down on your bed gently, hovering over you. It was a scene you’d love to get used to again.

“That’s okay. I’ll take it slow and if anything hurts please let me know, okay?”, you immediately nodded and Jungkook started to gently lift your shirt up until it stopped right below your breasts.

“God, I remember all the places I wanted to kiss you. I should’ve”, he sighs, pupils blown out as he takes you in.

“Really? Show me”, you were curious as you watched the man lean down, pressing his lips against the hip bone he had been circling earlier. You gasped as he suddenly bit down on the area and then licked it like he was soothing the pain.

“Here? Was this where my finger was?”, you felt yourself getting light-headed from both how close Jungkook was and from the aftermath of your memories and feelings coming back. “Princess”, his mouth moved upwards, teeth grazing against your skin until he made it to the lower part of your ribcage. “Here?”, you were so wet as you were focused on the past things Jungkook had done to you.

“Sweetheart, pay attention”, Jungkook began to push the fabric of your shirt a little higher and sucked on the underside of your boob. You immediately snapped out of the library memory that was playing in your head. Your hands were gripping his shoulders and you hadn’t even realized. “Here?”.

“Uh, yes. Well, no”, you shook your head to try to regain the past few moments back. “Oh, it was the first one!”, Jungkook chuckled at how excited you got, his hands pulling the shirt and bra off of you to throw off to the side. You shivered from how intensely he was looking at you from your chest, eyes locked on you.

“Do you remember when you realized you liked me?”, you asked, realizing Jungkook was now distracted. His eyes were darting from your breasts to your face, breathing shallow.

“Remember what?”, he finally asked, not even paying attention as he started to trace a finger around the birthmark on your ribcage.

“When you started to like me”, his hand came up to cup your breast and you instantly clenched around nothing.

“Ever since I laid eyes on you. Both times”, he looked up at you, eyes glazed over with so much lust and love that you were almost convinced this wasn’t Jungkook looking at you.

His eyes roamed until they were on the small of your back, pushing there gently to arch your back. You watched as he fit one of your breasts into his mouth, sucking on it as you rubbed your thighs together. You never noticed how sensitive your nipples were until they hardened under Jungkook’s tongue. Jungkook groaned and you looked down to notice he was stroking his cock between every breath he took between sucking your tits, watching the hard points of your nipples.

“Princess, I think I’ve changed my mind”, you were about to frown, wondering what you did wrong. Jungkook rested his head against your sternum, looking down at your body. “I think my favorite color must be red now”, he said as his finger trailed along the waistband of your underwear peeking out from over your skirt. He moved his finger down to push the skirt down your legs, shoving it off the bed along with your shirt.

You let out a sigh of relief and Jungkook smirked as his finger moved down your panties, grazing over your clit and down to the wet spot in the fabric. “Damn, princess”, he quietly whispered and your cheeks heated up at the knowledge that you were way too swollen and wet for how little he has done. “Your body really did miss me, huh?”, Jungkook looked up at you and you just nodded, too overwhelmed to speak.

He moved the fabric of your panties to the side, his finger getting soaked between your folds and he slowly started to sink the digit into your entrance. There was no resistance and Jungkook smiled at how you clenched around the finger, trying to make sure the pleasure wouldn’t leave.

“Fuck, you are so beautiful”, the words barely reached your ears as you closed your eyes, leaning against the pillow below you as pleasure erupted through you. You could feel Jungkook’s lips trailing along your stomach as he slowly added another finger, stretching you out more. His fingers were big and you had to open your legs further to make room. His other hand began to circle shapes on your hip.

“Relax, sweetheart”, your hands immediately gripped his arms when he curled his fingers just right inside of you, your mouth hanging open as pleasure went up your spine. He smiled at the sight, continuing to thrust into that spot. “There it is”, your nails were digging into his skin but Jungkook didn’t mind one bit. He only had one goal in mind and that was to get you prepped for him, resulting in his face slowly going lower down your body.

You didn’t really notice until you felt his warm tongue press against your clit, causing you to clench around his fingers and let out a gasp. Your hands moved to grip the sheets when Jungkook moved his own to hold your thighs apart, feeling them shake within his grasp. You could feel the knot in your stomach tighten up and you were clenching tightly around Jungkook’s fingers, barely allowing him to move them.

“I’m gonna cum! Fuck, Jungkook”, he kept his speed steady, swiping his tongue back and forth on your bundle of nerves until you’re cumming all over his fingers. He slowly pulled them out, letting you ride the orgasm. Embarrassment fills you as you look down to see his digits completely soaked in your arousal. Your chest rises and falls quickly as you calm down from your high.

“Can you handle more, baby? Can I fuck you?”, he’s gently rubbing your sore thighs as he looks down at you, waiting patiently for a response as you catch your breath. You move your hands to rub his arms, letting him know you’re okay.

“Yeah, please fuck me”, you nod and Jungkook kisses your forehead as he pulls down his pants and boxers. You watch as he starts pumping his cock with his hand, quickly being reminded of how big he is. Your mouth practically waters at the sight, watching as precum starts to leak from the tip.

He pushes himself between your thighs, aligning his cock with your entrance and the tip is pressing against your entrance.

“Are you ready? Let me know if it’s too much”, you nod and Jungkook leans down further against you, allowing you to wrap your arms around him as an anchor before he’s pushing himself in slowly. The burn of the stretch is worse than usual and your nails dig into Jungkook’s skin as you wince.

“Jungkook, hurts”, he immediately stops, looking down at you with concern. You wrap your legs around his waist and the new angle helps a little bit with the stretch.

“Just wait a second. I’m okay”, you smile reassuringly and he nods, pressuring his forehead against yours as he relishes in how you feel.

“Princess, you’re so tight and warm”, he sighs and you smile before you’re kissing him, getting used to the stretch he was providing you. You pulled back and gave Jungkook a nod. He slowly started to push more inside until he bottomed out, completely pressed against you.

“Can I move, princess? Or do you need more time?”, he gently pushed your legs up against your chest.

“You can move”, you nodded and looked down, watching as his cock completely came out of you just to go all the way back in as Jungkook moved. A bulge formed in your stomach every time he went back inside and you could’ve cum just at the sight of that.

“Fuck, I forgot how good you take my cock”, he groaned, watching the same scene you are and you clenched at the praise. Jungkook had to have noticed cause he grinned before his finger was circling your clit, enhancing the pleasure he was already giving you plenty of. He started setting an even pace and the familiar knot was forming again in your stomach, your legs shaking around Jungkook’s waist.

He was a little clumsy sometimes, cock slipping out just for him to have to align it back in but he felt too good for you to mind at all. His voice was tickling your skin as he whispered about how beautiful you are or how good you felt but you honestly couldn’t focus much on it. You were sucking him in deeper with every thrust he took, gripping him harder as if your body couldn’t let him go.

You watched as Jungkook trembled on top of you, pure pleasure going across his face as his cum filled you, spilling out as he continued to thrust. You grinned and bit into Jungkook’s shoulder as your own orgasm engulfed you, holding him close to you as he started to slow down.

“Would now be an appropriate time to ask you to be my girlfriend?”, Jungkook leaned back a bit to see your face, sweat dripping down both of your faces as his cock remained inside of you. You laughed and kissed him on the nose.

“Better late than never, I guess. Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend”, you nodded and Jungkook smiled at you, starting to place kisses anywhere he could reach before he collapsed on your chest.

“Good. Also, I’m going to buy you crystals after we rest. This place is boring without them”, your new boyfriend says as he briefly looks around your room. You do the same and realize he’s right.

“Sounds good to me”, you grin and finally let yourself rest, holding Jungkook as close as he was holding you.

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