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#got pregnant izzy on the brain
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Sam: *exists*
Izzy: *has I Wanna Have Your Babies by Natasha Bedingfield playing in his head on loop*
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choco-cherry-chunk · 1 month
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Modern au Izzy gets pregnant by Ed as they're in a relationship, he meets Stede who's heavily pregnant but his wife divorced him, giving him full custody of his kids due to her going off to become an artist (she sees the kids on the weekly basis, but didn't want to drag them around the world once she started to become famous). Thoughts?
Okay, I’m obsessed. Mary getting to have almost a role reversal AU in which she gets to adventure off to be an artist and Stede stays with his family, still making an effort to find himself. Ed and Stede would still be so fast to fall in love, and Ed is telling Izzy all about Stede - maybe the two of them have something of an open marriage, even though Izzy kind of wants to be exclusive, even if he won’t tell Ed? - and Izzy is like “wait… what was that last part?”
“He’s a tailor? Oh yeah, it’s crazy’s the shit he knows about fabrics—“
“No, after that.”
“The kids? He’s got two, and he’s getting along with the third one. They’re all really cool. The girl is so sassy, it’s hilarious—“
And Izzy’s mind is just swimming because he was going to tell Ed he was pregnant that night, admit how badly he wanted a baby. But what if Ed didn’t want that, now that he seems fucking obsessed with this Stede guy and his kids? So Izzy elects to find another time to tell him. Though he doesn’t know when that will be…
But the worst part is when Izzy meets Stede. Because as soon as he sees him and the man starts talking, Izzy gets it. He’s charming, he’s honest, he’s charismatic - if a bit stupid. And his kids are great, more than Ed realizes. But the angry, jealous, hateful part of his brain starts to whisper possibilities. That after years of meaningless sex and drunk hookups that meant nothing, this thing with Stede Ed has is different. This feels like the sort of thing Izzy may be left for… And Izzy needs to figure out what the fuck he’s going to do.
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xxisxxisxxis · 2 years
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Gateway Drug | Part Ninety-Five
Hi, guys! It’s so good to be back:)
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"...Viv, c'mon, you gotta help me with my bow tie!" Slash pleads, his fist knocking against the bathroom door as Steven holds handfuls of my hair whilst puke spews into the toilet.
"Give us a second there's been a complication!" Stevie shouts for me as I take in a deep breath, my throat burning, and the smell causes another bout of stomach-content to pour from me.
"It starts in, like, ten minutes, man!" Slash says from the other side.
"Give us a second!" Steven's dramatic, high pitched squeal echos as I flush the toilet, desperately in need of rinsing my mouth out.
He's already waiting with a damp washrag from the towel closet next to the counter, wiping the chunks of my breakfast from my lips.
"Stevie, I don't think I can do this." I mumble, give out from dry heaving. 
"You got this, Viv." He assures me.
"I don't got this." I shake my head, tears in my eyes as my nausea continues as Slash knocks again.
"Slash, two seconds, dude!" He assures him.
"It's Izzy. Open the fuckin' door."
Stevie opens it, Izzy striding in, slamming and locking it behind him.
"Sorry, Viv, I'm stressed. I gotta do this," He pulls a joint from the inside of his jacket and lights it up, the smell making my stomach turn again. "The fuck's wrong with you?" He asks, furrowing his brows at my disarray.
"She's been haking her brains out for twenty minutes." Steven tells him.
"I can't do this." I shake my head.
"What?" Izzy asks, confused. "Do what?" He looks to Stevie as if to say, "what the hell she talking about?"
"Viv, I really need this tied! It's almost time to go!" Slash is back and Steven opens the door.
"Go get Tansy to tie it." I hear him tell Slash.
"We can't find Tansy." He sounds almost distressed by it.
"What?" The three of us state at the same time.
"Her and Axl are fuckin' M.I.A.." He explains.
"It starts in ten minutes what do you mean they're M.I.A?" I hoarse out.
"Nobody can find them, Duff's getting a little pissed about it, Mandy's ready to start and we don't have Axl. They're not even here."
Before I can stop it, I'm lurching forward, missing Izzy's shoes by an inch when I vomit onto the tiled floor.
"I can't do this." I repeat it as Izzy plucks the wet rag from Steven and wipes my mouth again before I go to the sink and cup water in my hands to rinse my mouth out.
He's keeping the blunt between his lips as he goes to Slash, tying the bow tie around his neck, taking a long drag before letting smoke push out of his mouth and nose.
"You two go talk to Duff, make sure he stays in a good mood. We'll figure out where Tansy and Axl are and it'll be fine." He states, raising his brows.
"Sir, yes, sir." Stevie gives a salute, throwing his arm around Slash's shoulders.
Izzy's pushing the door shut, turning to look at me where I'm sitting on the edge of the tub.
"I gotta go home, I can't do this." I take deep breaths.
"You're one of his best friends, what the fuck do you mean you can't do this?" He bluntly asks me.
"I can't do this." I say. "I don't even need to be here, Izzy, I'm the ex-girlfriend he got pregnant, like, two days before he got back with the girl he's marrying, now."
"You sound like one of those goddamn headlines they're printing left and right." He accuses me, leaning against the counter.
"Her family is here, there's a lot of people — I don't think I can do this."
"I thought you'd be over what people say about you by now." He blows more smoke.
"These people are going to potentially be around my kid someday, Izzy, I want them to like me." I explain.
"Who gives a shit, you've already got people that like you. I like you." He motions to himself. "So who the fuck else matters but us?"
"I don't think I can do this." I say for the umpteenth time.
"Hey," He steps to me in his rented tux and places his hands on my shoulders. "Duff's stressing out right now, Tansy and Axl are missing, and Nikki's probably gonna think you snuck out the window and ran far, far, away from here, alright? I get that there's a lot happening in the press, I get that you and Mandy are still butting heads over the argument you got into weeks ago, but you've had your time to wallow over it, and now it's time to dry it up and show up for Duff." He asks me and I look at him for a couple seconds. "You're a Sixx. You guys don't pussy-out and hide from your problems, so why're you doing it, now?"
"Because I'm a Sixx and that's what we do." My voice shakes, thick with tears.
He stares at me for a moment before exasperatingly letting out a breath.
"Oh, geez, Vivian." He's rubbing his forehead, realizing a pep talk might not work right now, before he gets eye level with me, crouching down. "Do you love him?" He asks me, next, and I wipe the back of my hand under my chin, catching tears.
"Yeah." I nod, sniffling.
"You're not here for anyone else but him. To be happy with him, and have a good time because he's getting married, and you're about to let a bunch of randoms piss on the parade." He keeps on. "You love Duff, so what does it matter if you're carrying his fucking kid or not? Why the hell should you feel embarrassed about that, or give a damn what someone who doesn't even know you says about it?"
He makes a very good point.
"...You're doing this for Duff." It's repeated like it's an affirmation. "And Vivian Sixx doesn't pussy-out." He adds sternly.
This is what it takes to get me to quickly wipe tear stains from my face with the back of my hand and take a final deep breath, coughing on the smoke that's fogged up the room.
"You ready?" He asks me when I stand up, his hand patting at my back to try to clear up my cough.
"Yeah." I wheeze out as he snatches the door open, white swirls dispersing into the hallway of Duff's mother's home.
"It's go time, boys!" Izzy shouts as I head toward the stairs.
Their families are gathering in the back yard where the ceremony is supposed to take place.
Mandy's keeping to the guest room upstairs with her friends while Duff is downstairs in the other bathroom, and just as I’m heading down the stairs, the front door is bursting open to reveal Tansy in a bright pink sequin dress, hand in hand with Axl.
“Sorry, we’re late!” She says, her blonde hair curled, falling down her back.
Long gone is the skeleton-like figure she once carried in a pale stumble with a dopey smile on her face.
She’s gained weight, a healthy amount, once again taking on the form of the girl I once knew in high school.
Rehab, a healthy relationship, and love for herself has done wonders on her.
“Finally!” Stevie pipes from the living room.
“Where’s he at?” Axl asks, taking his jacket off, referring to Duff.
“He wanted me to give him a second. I think he’s shaking out last minute jitters.” Steven informs him.
Looking at the clock in the kitchen, seeing it’s 3:55.
“…I’m gonna go talk to him.” I slip past them, glancing at Nikki where he’s sitting on the couch next to Slash.
He looks at me, and I don’t say a word to him as I continue down the other hallway to Duff.
My shaking hand knocks at it, and I hear him take a couple steps to the door.
We haven’t spoken in weeks.
My breath stops upon seeing him when the door opens, and he looks down at me for about two seconds before he forces himself to look away.
“Hey, Viv.” He says it nervously, and I can smell the perfume of vodka on his breath.
“Hey, Duff.” I reply, feeling a lump in my throat. “I was gonna come check and make sure you were ready on time.” I lie.
“Yeah…” He says, looking down at himself in the tux. “I’m ready.”
I can’t help the, “are you?”, that leaves my lips before I can stop it and he takes in a deep breath.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” He asks me, furrowing his brows, and I don’t respond.
He takes a step back so I can come in, and I shut the door behind me, leaning against it as he puts his flask aside.
“You’re drinking?”
“Just a little. For my nerves.” He states as lightly as he can, trying to keep me from worrying, his eyes looking at the dark green dress I’m wearing that stops at my knees and hugs at my little baby bump. “You look cute.” He adds it honestly, smiling at me.
“You do, too.” I say back in the same tone.
I remember how short we are on time before I try to cut to the chase.
Apparently he’s on the same page as me because he says, “Why’re you here, Viv?” as I say, “Things can’t change.”
“What?” He furrows his brows.
“I’m happy for you, and I’m happy you’ve met the person you want to be with forever…but things can’t change, Duff. Not with us. Not like they have in the past weeks.”
His face falls, a look of guilt in his eyes.
“And I’m scared that things are gonna change, and we won’t be the way we were before.” It keeps coming from me like vomit, tears soon joining in. “You’re my best friend. Before you were someone I was in love with, and before I was pregnant…you were my best friend, first. And we never fought, we never went without speaking…and this is the first time either of us has said more than a few words to the other in over a month.” I point out, my throat aching as tears dot at my lashes.
“Vivian,” He says lowly.
“And it’s your wedding day and I’m not trying to piss on your parade, but I can’t be happy if you’re still upset with me.” I confess, shakily. “And the fact you’re even not speaking to me unless I lock you in a bathroom and make you is a sign that things are already changing.”
“I haven’t been speaking much because between putting the wedding together and working out a deal for Guns, I haven’t known what the hell to say to you.” He tells me. “We don’t really fight so I didn’t know how to patch things back up.” It’s added before he takes a last swig of his drink and puts the flask back on the counter, stepping to me.
“I’m not just the one you knocked up.” I state. “You loved me at one point.”
“That was an asshole thing to say.” He admits, breathing out. “But Mandy’s not any less than you just because…” He trails off, but I understand what he’s going to say.
“The entirety of what I said to Mandy was an asshole thing to say, too.” I say back. “I just don’t want things to change.”
It’s quiet for a moment, before he’s reaching for my hand, grasping at it.
“You’re not getting kicked to the curb. You’re still my best friend. Nothing’s changing, Viv. I still have all those dreams for what I want, you’re still a part of them.”
It had hit a soft spot in me, the dreams he’d discussed with me when we were dating…about us staying together, getting married, and eventually moving back to Seattle once he and Guns got where they wanted to be in their career.
It was that moment I was put at ease to an extent.
I was no longer one of the pinnacles of all he could dream, but I was there, in some capacity. And that was all I had wanted.
Hearing this brings a tear down my cheek, and he’s wiping it with his thumb, holding my hand to his lips for a moment.
We just stand there with one another for a moment longer before there’s a soft knock at the door.
“Duff, c’mon, it’s time to get hitched.” Matt’s voice comes through behind me, and we look at one another a last time before I’m reaching behind me with my free hand, opening the door and pulling my hand from his grasp.
He holds onto it for a split second longer before letting go, and I step out before he does.
I’m face to face with his older brother while I pass by him, the expression on his face shifting a little at the sight of me, his eyes darting to Duff behind me, and I’m turning the corner of the hall, seeing Nikki before me, waiting at the end of the hall, his brows furrowing at my teary eyes.
The moment is stolen away with the hooping and hollering of Stevie excitedly attacking Duff as the groom steps toward the door, waiting for Tansy, Nikki and I to get outside and grab a seat to witness him marry the one he’s going to live out his dreams with.
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Watching Con O'Neill's Filmography Day 8- The Last Seduction II (1999)
Warnings: Women in lingerie, on-screen clothed sex, drug use, phone sex, violence against a pregnant woman, voyeurism/public sex acts, gore, gun violence, murder, blood, stabbings, etc.
I did not bother to watch the first one, though I've only seen good things from people online. Again, it doesn't feel like I've missed anything by skipping to Con content.
As always, live reaction below the cut, review overall at the bottom.
Quick message before we start. We've all seen the gifs of what Con does here. He has a weird short 90s haircut and acts in what could be described as soft-core porn. We're both going to pretend we didn't see each other here, seeing this shit, right?
I didn't see you, you didn't see me.
Good. Now, let the show begin-
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Opening logo reminds me of my school mascot, not a good start.
Joan Severance, you deserve better. I don't know who you are, but please get another agent.
I actually love the opening font here for some weird reason. It's all swirled, and silly.
That attorney looks like Patrick Bateman from a distance, honestly, that would be great. This movie couldn't afford Christian Bale in the 90s.
I know the point of the movie is that she's hot. So I'm getting it out now. She's hot. The all-black style is a type of mine, and I'm not mad.
Smoking is bad for you. At least she's considerate, actually throwing out the cig...Nvm, she's an asshole. Not so hot anymore.
This takes place in Barcelona and our main cast will be Brits? Sounds about right.
Did she put on lingerie in the hotel, then take it off, and get dressed to go meet someone?
I hope Con got a good vacation out of this at the very least. If this was filmed in Barcelona. Which- (Editor Me can't find anything about this movie, I'm assuming just establishing shots?)
F.U.2 is a fun bar name. Real Izzy vibes
A GAY BARTENDER
AND CON
(my brother called his 90s shaved look 'adult Greg Hefley'-Diary of a Wimpy Kid. Honestly, I can't unsee it)
Is this his 3rd character that meets the protag at a bar (Scarborough Ahoy, maybe Dancing Thru the Dark if that wasn't a diner)? That's a pattern.
The hesitation over calling Con a gentlemen is funny
TROY FENTEN okay, that's a name. sure. let's just move past that.
'FAGS FROM A FAG'. Oh, this is going to be a movie. You know, most straight movies from this era didn't even have queer characters. But in Con's bad movies, they're added so Con can bully someone. The bad Con movies just make him a homophobe. I'm connecting these dots-
Again, the whole 'Have you been in love?' thing. Dancing, This, 3 steps to heaven. There's a pattern. In an interview for 'Telstar' Con said Joe Meek was obsessed with writing puppy love in all his songs, when this fucker can't escape 'longing' in his own career.
This looks like the start of a porno. (kinda?)
This is a weirdly subservient foreplay? The taking orders, voyeurisms, etc...Odd? Well, at least we know Troy is willing to go down on someone, which is something that will surely affect the plot.
Don't undo a condom wrapper with your teeth.
What is that position? She's braced up over the arms of a chair. Seated on the floor would be more comfortable. For both of them!
Who says 'frisky' in day-to-day life.
I WANT HIS WARDROBE(Editor Me, it's literally just a suit. I don't know, I'm easily impressed). The Gomez and Morticia look to their outfits is great.
How do you run a sex phone line surrounded by people in the same room. At least he employs everyone and anyone, icon.
Real 'ugly' people can tell when you're flirting with them to get shit. We're trained from middle school age for survival. Also, that travel agency guy is hiding a British accent poorly.
(This is the point where my brother (he's 18 don't worry, I have a brain) wanted to watch, so we restarted. He's seen Dancing, OFMD, Vengeance, and Telstar. He's a trooper and being their for my Con O'Neill phase. The bullying of Con commences.)
My favorite comment of his was "I hope this guy gets shanked in Barcelona" after his sexist line about women. Valid.
OH MY GOD. That computer design is awful, Graphic Design is my passion, indeed
Just tell her exactly how the business runs. That's a smart idea you won't regret later.
(About him being able to be on any call) That's a consent violation
"Dumb bitch." Okay! Ew
This seems like a shit place to work if he can just casually stand and watch over you perform like that
(about one of the phone people using company time to talk to her boyfriend) Could he have a system to block calls from people who don't pay or suspicious numbers? Why didn't he just do that?
HE JUST PUNCHES A PREGNANT WOMAN? (blood on her face, not on her fists) Okay? Like, why would anyone stay?
("naughty boy.")WHY IS SHE INTO THIS? Red Flags? NAHHHH
SHE JUST TRIED TO KICK I PIGEON! ("Pigeons may be flying rat's but you're the real skum of the city" - My Brother Everyone)
'This is the woman incels think exist'-Again, he's just rocking it tonight
Oh so 'he's falling in love' WHY? Why do you do these roles CON! So far she has let you fuck her, been kinda dodgy about anything with her past, and rude.
(Footjob scene)BUTTON UP THE BOTTOM OF THE JACKET AT LEAST.
Okay the older couple not yelling at them, but stealing a peak made me laugh.
IS THAT A CLOCKWORK ORANGE MANIQUINE IN THE BACKGROUND (yeah, he has mannequin wall art. No, it's never mentioned)
Good, he got blue balled, deserved for being a bastard.
Why is she doing all this? Just to get a sliver of the profits?
(While he's buying drugs from a seller, he gets in all close.) Con shouldn't be allowed to smile like that at men in sniffing distance while playing a homophobe.
It's a good thing he's high, and not clearly able to see how badly she's lying/bluffing. It's not even a convincing performance, like...why?
I don't like him saying good girl, not at all. Which is surprising for me. I'm proud of myself for not thinking Con acting like this is hot.
(She just kind of leans over, unzips his pants, leans in, and goes for it. Awkward pan up to his face) Was he commando? Was he already hard? So many questions.
(At a strip club) What's with that pole? Her hand goes around half of it! Thick as a telephone pole!
Why did she even come to this bar for info? OH, she's buying a gun.
This isn't hot, like, at all. It's just gross.
(bastard gets stabbed with the straw)GOOD FOR HER
She did just walk past people, covered in blood.
This false phone call thing is somehow isn't gay. Sad.
-Catching yall up, it's been 10 minutes and nothing fun has happened. She shows Troy the tape. He somehow doesn't hear that she entrapped a guy and got him in jail. They set up a trap for blondie who was threatening her life.
Troy saying sexist shit only to immediately get shut down is so funny.
the hitman from earlier isn't going to fight blondie cause he expects to fight a man, not a woman, right? Yep, called it.
Based body guard
I-what was that fight? Just a few punches then overkill?
(Body guard gets shot up)What did he do to deserve that man?
Can no one hear a gun going off?
What do you mean by 'that looks nasty'? She looks fine.
So Troy gets semi-framed? Like, he was a piece of shit, but still, that doesn't solve anything really. The business might stay afloat but since none of the people know how the computers work, or can reroute funds to their pockets, what's the point? They just lost their jobs! Same with the bar.
The two leads smugly flirting and smoking it's not gay at all actually, they're enemies! (banging my head into a wall) WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN
Why does this Troy get called a 'naughty boy' so often in this movie. We should bring this energy to all his roles...especially Izzy-
So she just gets away with it? That's a shitty ending, I didn't even like her in this movie. I barely tolerated Troy, but I wanted her to get caught.
The movie just...ends.
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Writing: 3/10 Sloppy, I couldn't follow why our characters were doing what they were doing half the time. Also, there were points where the writers realized we might be starting to like Tony, so they just made him do/say something shitty. Like a marvel movie making a villain have a good point, then making them kill a bus full of children. Just so we know who to root for. Who was our protagonist? I will remember this movie for the (somehow stylish look at the time) 90s Con, and the weird sex scenes. Again, I love a strong female lead but she just didn't do anything fun.
Cinematography/Editing 5/10: Nothing memorable, nothing subtractive. Meh. It was, in fact, a movie.
All actors besides Con: 4/10: Forgetable or just bad. Again, it's not their fault, it's the writing. I didn't know who the story wanted us to root for. So I'd start to like a character just for them to do something confusing or shitty. Again, it's obvious they were trying. I hope these people got to work on something better.
Con: 6/10 He can't save a movie. He is having the most fun here, which isn't saying a lot. Troy is Con's most homophobic character in his filmography to date. Con plays him all bark with no bite. It's fun to see him play a totally irredeemable jackass. Again, the whole 'falling in love' plot was introduced and kind of dropped, but I'm glad they didn't really commit to it? Troy is way worse than Angel (from 3 Steps To Heaven), Angel was fun in his shitty behavior and stayed consistent in the story. Here Troy's an abusive dick. I was having fun until he punched a pregnant lady for shock value, then it was hot/cold the whole film. Good performance, shit script.
Overall 5-6/10 Not a strong recommendation, his worst film by miles. If you go in knowing it's shit, however, you can have a great time! I did! My brother and I got to watch a shitty movie and just take it for what it was! If I was watching this alone it would be a 4/10. It's no 'The Room', thank god, but it's nothing groundbreaking.
There are two POV characters and the story couldn't make me care about either of them. The setting felt like it could have taken place in London, Seattle, or Amsterdam. Con was fun, but this movie is really only worth it if you want to see Con play a homophobic weasel of a man.
Only higher than the projects he was barely in. (Link should be updated for those who want to rerank anything, ill post it in the comments if needed)
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I hope everyone has an amazing holiday season. This time of year is shit, but you're already this far in!
@ivegotnonameidea Thank you so much for your recommendation and assistance!
I would love to hear everyone else's opinions on this shitty film!
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vierandancer · 11 months
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Mun Questions: Who was your first OC? Do you still write your first OC?
Munday Questions | Accepting!
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This is a tough one because I've been writing since I was a child. Technically, the first OC I made was (of course) a self-insert for a book series I attempted when I was in 5th grade. I then remade her to be less self-inserty in 7th grade. Her name changed from Evangeline to Crystal, which is hilarious to me because the first name was actually more unique than 'Crystal' lmao. But haven't written her since; she didn't have a particular personality, though.
I have two other OCs that started as self-inserts for forum/Gaia RPs from around 6th-7th and are now NOTHING like me, whom I still write in supporting roles to this day! Vivienne is a super extroverted punk rock girl who gets pregnant right after high school, but stays with her boyfriend because he's a good guy and eventually joins nursing school. Rose is a stoic judge who was added to another OC's family as an aunt; she'd probably be in her fifties now, but still embraces a very goth style, both because she enjoys it and also to intimidate racists. I have actually never wrote either of them on tumblr; Vivienne was planned to cameo in a scifi group RP that never got far enough into the story before it fell through.
My first OC blog on Tumblr was a dual-OC blog for a Goddess of Love and her mortal reincarnation, Lenora. Technically they were the same soul, but they ended up so drastically different from one another they were basically two OCs. The Goddess' story ended officially when no one wrote with her anymore, and she had a tragic and solitary end. Lenora is still kicking around in my brain, but really her story is also pretty complete as she's settled in with her husband and family. Her daughter Izzy is a little more active over on @lannamused.
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Grey's Pack: Labor
Fandom: Grey's Anatomy Summary: The five times Derek Shepherd thinks he goes into labor and the one time he does. Warnings: ABO dynamics, pregnancy, mpreg, birth sexual situations, morning sickness Word Count: 5,333 Ship(s): Meredith Grey/Mark Sloan/Addison Montgomery/Derek Shepherd
Archive link!
A/N: So I just want to put an emetephobia warning for the third scenario because it describes Meredith having some morning sickness. There's nothing too graphic though! There's also a few sexual situations/references but nothing super descriptive because every one of these scenarios is Derek thinking he's going into labor so they don't continue through that. This is my first time doing this kind of trope so I hope that I did it okay! Thanks for checking it out and reading. Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3
1.
The best and worst thing about being a neurosurgeon is that the explanations of problems normally take a lot of talking for the person experiencing them to really begin to understand. This meant that as a very pregnant omega, he often got to sit in one of the chairs meant to visit as he explained everything. Sometimes, however, there were too many people in the room and not enough places for them to all sit so he had to stand as he answered what was essentially the same question over the over again. As he was nearing his thirty sixth week of pregnancy, being on his feet for that long was the worst thing that he could do to himself. Especially when he didn’t have the gray matter of a brain to turn his focus away from his aches and pains. Every day it was a toss up about whether or not he was going to go home in the worst pain he had been in his entire pregnancy.
He had rolled poorly today, and his feet were reminding him of their protest with every step he took. He had one hand on the part of his hip that was aching worse than the rest and his eyes dead-set on the station where he would be able to fill in the chart clutched in his other hand. As soon as it really came into view, he had to physically bite his tongue to stop himself from growling when he saw that an intern had already taken up residence there to study for the upcoming exams. He turned, even though that took almost more effort than it was worth, and found the next best place.
The neurosurgeon had just settled down into the padded chair in front of the lightbox when someone else came into the room. He was never going to get this chart done, he thought to himself when he heard the door creaking open.
"Oh, Derek," Callie said, surprised to find the omega in the space that she had been using. They were in the same pack but they weren’t quite close yet, especially since she and Izzie were only just mated. "Everything okay?"
"Mm? Oh, yeah," he nodded as he shook himself out of his haze and looked up to his packmate. "Just couldn't find anywhere to sit down so I hid away in here."
"Well, you can use the space as much as you want as long as I can come in here and look at the x-rays while I plan what to do to fix these bones," she chuckled. He nodded and then looked back down at the chart that he was working on. She looked over his shoulder at the x-rays that she had put in the light box a few minutes before Derek had shown up. They thought in silence for a moment before she noticed the uncomfortable, pained look on the omega's face. "Derek, are you sure that you're okay?"
"Mm, yeah, I've just been having some cramping and discomfort all day. I thought that when the twins stopped moving as much last night I would have gotten a break, but I guess not," he tried to chuckle while giving her a weak smile.
Callie opened her mouth a couple of times as she tried to formulate what to say. "Do you think that you could be in labor?"
The omega blinked for a second before he nodded. "Yeah, I guess I could be. George said that he had some vague cramping before he went into labor. It's a little early for the twins to come though."
"Well, that's kind of the deal with multiples. They come early," Callie shrugged. "Do you want me to go get your alphas?"
"Mm, no, I want to finish this," he said as he pointed towards the half finished chart with the wrong side of his pen. He leaned back in the chair and then rubbed a hand over his massive stomach. "If I am in labor, I'm in the very beginning of it so it'll be a long time until the twins actually come. If they're coming."
The alpha rocked back and forth on her feet. "I'm going to stay here with you for a bit. I know that you're older than me and you can totally handle yourself but I'm newly mated so I'm feeling really protective and I need to make sure that you're okay before I leave," she explained.
He sighed, rubbing his temple with his thumb and forefinger. "Alright. I know that trying to fight you and get you to leave won't go well. But you should go check on Arizona and Izzie before you finish your case so you don't snap at an intern or patient."
She nodded and sat down next to him. They ended up talking about her case to try and get the game plan down. The cramps Derek had been having were pretty much gone by the time that they had gotten everything riddled out, so they didn't even bother to tell his alphas that he could have been in labor.
2.
Her lips were pressed up against his scent gland directly over where she had remarked him when they got back together. He felt more slick leak from him and down into his underwear. Addison had already removed his pants when she got him up onto the bed and into his nest. She had him leaning back slightly, using one hand to keep him slightly upright while he leaned back against her chest. Her hands wandered up and down his front before she began to undo the buttons on his maternity shirt to free him from the fabric constraints.
He turned his head and caught her lips to let her know that he needed her now unless she wanted him to be grumpy for the rest of the evening. The alpha quickly picked up on what he needed and tossed her scrubs off as quickly as she could. She helped him back so that he was leaning against the wall of the nest closest to the headboard so he could be supported. "I wish I could keep you like this forever," she mumbled as she spread his legs and wrapped one of them awkwardly around his hip. It was hard for him to move naturally anymore due to how pregnant he was.
"Shut up," he whispered as he reached up and placed his hand on the back of her neck to bring her down into a kiss. He let out a moan into her mouth just as she pressed her cock into him entirely. She bucked her hips forward just once before Derek placed his hands on her shoulders and broke their kiss. "Wait, wait, wait, that hurts," he whined.
She immediately pulled out of him and grabbed his hands. "Are you okay, Derek?" she asked worriedly.
"Contraction, I'll be okay," he shook his head to try and get her worry to go away. It didn't work, as her brows knitted together and she shifted a bit closer to him. 
"How many contractions have you had today, my love?" she asked, scenting him to try and help him calm down. Her arousal had completely disappeared upon seeing her lover in pain.
He took in a small breath and then let it out slowly. He shifted his hips a bit before he turned his head to face to look at his wife. "I've had a couple throughout the day. Maybe three in the last hour?"
"Derek!" she almost shouted. She took a moment and then calmed herself down. "Sorry for getting a little upset, my dear. You just should have told me that you were having contractions, I never would have tried to have sex with you if I had known you could be in labor."
"Well, that's kind of why I didn't tell you," he admitted, his cheeks turning bright red. 
She gave him a look and then leaned in and kissed him softly. Addison then moved to the outside of the nest and got him another pair of underpants. "Do I have to?" he whined as he took the clothes from her. "I want to continue."
"Derek, I have no interest in fucking you when you might be in labor. The second I put my penis in you and you were in pain, I completely lost the will to have sex," she shook her head. The omega little out little grumbling noises as he let her help him put the underpants on and then a pair of sweatpants. He put on a bra to stop the colostrum from leaking onto their bed. "I love you," Addison reminded him as she got up into the nest and behind him. 
"No," he let out a scoff as he leaned his head against his shoulder. "If you loved me you'd have sex with me."
"Omega, I love you which is why I didn't have sex with you," she argued, kissing his cheek. 
He eventually conceded to her and took a nap, though she was in the doghouse in the morning when it turned out that he wasn't in labor.
3.
Meredith groaned as she shifted in front of the toilet. She didn't get sick as much anymore, but she still had nausea from time to time. Naomi triggered it most of all since her baby food, which ended up all over the dining room every time she ate, set the beta off every time. Addison was sitting behind her, rubbing her hips. "You're alright, Mer," she murmured as she kissed her mating gland.
"No, I'm so sick of being pregnant," she whined as she shifted again. She flushed the last bit of her sick down the toilet and then moved so that she was kneeling and grasping the edge of the counter. She put one hand on the underside of her heavy stomach. The redheaded alpha was up in a second and helping her up while holding onto her elbow.
"I know that you're sick of being pregnant, but the baby will come when she wants to," Addison placed another kiss on her cheek. "And when the labor starts I'm guessing you'll want to be pregnant again in no time."
The beta scoffed, "Are you forgetting that I was still up and working around when I had appendicitis? I only stopped because I was puking too much to work. I can handle labor. And I want to meet my pup." She grabbed her toothbrush and cleaned out her mouth so she didn't have to taste the bitter bile. When she spit out her toothpaste, she stood up and took a deep breath through her nose so that she could smell the scents coming from her other mates. "Though by the smell of it I might not have to wait long."
Addison's face paled a little bit. "Nope, you're going to go and sit down in the office. I won't have you and Derek in labor at the same time. That's too much for us to deal with."
"But…" the beta tried before she saw how freaked out her mate was. As much as she wanted to meet her pup and not be pregnant anymore, she knew that it would be really bad if she was in labor at the same time as their omega since he was having twins but they would both need the father of their pups there as they labored and delivered. She sighed as she dug a washcloth out of the linen closet attached to their bathroom and pressed it over her mouth and nose.
Addison kissed her forehead. "I'll be down to give you some scented items and your quilt once I check on him," she said softly.
"I know you will," Meredith chuckled before she carefully walked out of the bathroom and through the bedroom, straight to the door in the hall. She went down into the office where she struggled to get the pull-out couch into bed form.
Upstairs, Derek shifted in the bed and blinked tiredly after Meredith as the beta left. "What's going on?" he whined, wanting to have all of his mates close to him. 
Addison got up into the nest so that she was on the other side of it from Mark. She leaned down and pressed a kiss to his temple. "How are you feeling, my love?"
"Fine," he grumbled as he shifted under his blanket. He moved her hand down to his swollen stomach so she could feel the pups move again. Addison smiled, letting herself be distracted by her growing children.
She was brought back to what she was supposed to be doing when Mark woke up and blinked at her a few times. "Where's Mer?"
"Oh," the alpha swore under her breath. "She thought that she smelled you in labor, so she's down in the office room."
"I'll bring her some things and help her get the pull-out couch set up," Mark yawned. He stood up and got out of the nest carefully so that he didn't destroy any part of the carefully crafted area that his mates had made. He grabbed Meredith's quilt and a couple of other items so she could feel comforted as she slept. "I'll be back in a second, okay?"
"I'm in labor?" Derek asked, blinking sleepily at her.
"You know that Mer's nose is a lot more sensitive than mine, so you might be in early labor," she explained. "I can't smell anything yet."
He pouted a bit. "I either want to have my pups or be in labor," he complained.
She kissed his lips carefully. "I know, but all we can do is be careful and wait."
Both Meredith and Derek were very upset when the morning rolled around and there was no more labor scent coming from the omega, meaning that they would have to wait even longer despite both having spent the night like they didn't want to.
4.
Derek groaned as he closed his eyes a bit tighter while trying to go back to sleep. He was so far into the third trimester that he was waking up rather often in the middle of the night to pee, or because of insomnia. "Hi Doc," he mumbled as he felt the cold nose of their old dog press into his hand. He grunted a small bit as he felt the right twin kicking his back before he realized that the pain was actually the beginning of a contraction. He shifted uncomfortably while it passed.
Once the pain and pressure that came with every contraction he had, he peeled his eyes opened and looked over Meredith's head to the alarm clock to see what time it was. He shifted on the bed so that he was on his back for a moment and then struggled so that he was sitting up. Mark let out a grunt and shifted closer to him so that his head was resting on his swollen stomach like it had been on the pillow seconds ago.
Derek let a small smile grace his face as he moved his hand down and began to pet his mate's hair. The pups wriggled around in his belly to try and get more comfortable themselves in their confined space. "I know you're uncomfortable, I am too," he whispered.
"Derek?" Mark asked as he began to wake up upon feeling the babies wiggling under his hold. He got up with a small grunt and kissed his omega's cheek. "Can't sleep?"
"No," he shook his head. He couldn't help the smile that spread across his face as he continued, "I had a contraction."
Mark was suddenly more awake. He began to smile as well, grabbed the omega's hand and threading their fingers together. "You think we're going to have a baby tonight?"
"I think we just might," he whispered in reply. "But if I am in labor we should move away from Mer so she doesn't go into labor too."
The alpha nodded in agreement. He slipped out of the nest and put a shirt on before he offered a hand to his mate. Derek took it and awkwardly shifted to the edge of the nest so that the alpha could help lift him over the wall and onto the floor. "There you are, beautiful."
"Shut up," he scoffed as he began to waddle out of their bedroom and down the hall. They stayed in the living room as he had a couple of contractions after that but they petered out after two or three hours and both omega and alpha were left disappointed that they'd have to meet the twins another day.
5.
"How did you know that you were in labor?" Derek sighed as he sat down in one of the big recliners in their living room. 
"Huh?" George asked, looking away from the toddler standing on his lap to the other omega. Naomi had his little pudgy fists wrapped around two of his fingers. He was standing, wavering back and forth while making babbling sounds at his mother. "Sorry, Naomi is very distracting, aren't you sweet stuff?" he giggled as he blew a raspberry on the pup's cheek.
Derek placed both of his hands  on his huge stomach while his heart ached. He wanted so badly to meet his pups and it felt like his body was determined to make it so that didn't happen. "How did you know that you were in labor?"
"Well, I kind of didn't," he shrugged. "I had a lot of energy and so I walked around getting things ready, y’know, nesting. But then my water broke. Iz didn't notice a scent or anything."
"So you just had a boost of energy? No cramps or contractions or a weird feeling or labor scent?" Derek almost complained. He was wracking his brain to see if he had any energy surges over the past day if he was in labor. When he had woken up this morning, he felt rested for the first time since he had entered the third trimester, which sent a shot of excitement through his body.
"Nope, my water just broke and I knew that I was in labor," George made a fake shocked face as he turned back to his happily shrieking and babbling pup. 
Owen yawned as he walked into the living room as well. He lowered himself down onto the chair and looked over at the other two omega doctors, "What're we talking about?"
Derek grunted as he felt one of the twins rolling over. "How George felt when he went into labor. I'm kind of grasping at straws because I'm sick of being pregnant."
"Ugh, I feel that," Owen grunted as he shifted where he was sitting a bit so he was leaning back against the chair a bit more.
The older omega chuckled, "I can't imagine how you feel. I'm not even to my due date and I've been sick of this for weeks." 
He shrugged. "I'm scared that delivering is going to freak Cristina out again so I'm not too eager to go into labor. But when I almost went into labor a couple months ago I felt off all day. Like my head was in the clouds, or kind of like how you feel before you go into heat."
"Mm, yeah, I felt like that during my labor," George nodded in agreement.
"Ow!" Noami shrieked excitedly as he bent his little legs to get attention back to him.
"Ow?" George gasped, feigning shock. He wrapped his hand around the back of the pup's body to bring him closer. "No ow."
Derek sighed as he resigned himself to the fact that he was never going to go into labor. He knew that assumption wasn't true in the slightest, but it just cemented itself into his mind the more time passed, especially when Owen went into labor in the middle of the night later that very same day.
+1
"Wonderful day to save lives," Derek spoke into the air of the OR as grasped the scalpel in his hand. He was behind the patient's head on the chair that he now had to operate on since he was so heavily pregnant. He really shouldn't have been operating at this point since his due date was creeping closer and closer but he couldn't help himself. The more time that he spent at home or waddling around the hospital while doing consults, the more he felt cramped up. He had woken up that morning and decided that he was going to have at least one more surgery before the delivery of his pups and his maternity leave.
He worked so hard on saving the patient that he had completely forgotten about his pregnancy until he began to have small contractions. They began as small pains in his back but then began to wrap around his heavy stomach periodically. 
"I'll close, Dr. Shepherd," Lexie informed him as she looked over at her brother-in-law. She had the same sensitive nose as her sister, so she was able to smell the difference in him despite the heavy scent blocker he had on his neck and wrist. 
"Alright, let Dr. Avery help you," he nodded. If he hadn't realized how long he had been having the small contractions he probably would have insisted that he close since he had been away from the OR for so long. He stripped off his gloves and then took his mask off as he walked out into the scrub room. 
He paused as he saw both of his alphas standing there, almost glaring at him. "Derek!" Addison said, throwing her hands out in exasperation. "I thought that we all agreed that you weren't going to do surgeries until after you delivered the twins and got back from maternity leave?"
"It's not that we don't want you to operate anymore because we know that you're an amazing surgeon and this is your livelihood like it is for us, but this is risky," Mark nodded in agreement. 
He opened his mouth to talk with them, to try and at least get the alphas a little bit calmer, but then he felt something wet dripping down his legs. He looked down and watched as a puddle began to form around his feet. The voices of his worried alphas talking to him had completely seeped away so he could barely hear them, just focusing on what was happening. "Uh, my water just broke."
"Huh?" Mark asked, blinking a few times at his childhood friend as his brain tried to wrap around the fact that he was going to be a father soon.
"Oh Jesus, it did," Addison said as she looked down at his pants. All of the anger that had been there a second ago had completely dissipated and she was left with a certain giddiness and apprehension that came with all new parents. "Come on, we're going to go and get you checked in so we can have these babies!"
She reached out and took his hand. She threaded their fingers together and brought their omega around the alpha that was staring at the wall behind Derek now while he still tried to figure out what was happening. Mark eventually turned around and followed after them, though he had to jog to keep up with them once he had finally realized.
Derek was checked into the hospital while Mark went home to get the hospital bag that they had packed months ago. The omega had changed into his hospital gown and was resting on the bed with the peanut ball in between his legs as the OB that was helping him through his labor, a friend of Addison's, wanted the babies to shift positions before he tried to deliver. Luckily, he had gone long enough in his pregnancy that if he progressed normally and felt up to it he would be able to have a vaginal birth instead of a Cesarean. He also had a couple of IVs and monitors attached to him so that they could make sure he was hydrated and that everything with the twins was happening alright.
"Hey baby," Mark smiled as he walked in. "How are you feeling?"
"Like I'm finally in labor," he grinned excitedly. "I get an epidural in two centimeters too."
"Yeah, I bet you're happy for those pain meds they already gave you," the alpha chuckled as he walked over. He pulled out one of the blankets that had the pack scent for the omega during his labor and delivery process. He laid it gently over his mate before he pulled the chair up to the side of the bed. 
Derek reached out and grabbed his alpha's hand. "I wish Meredith could be here to see the first of our litter being born," he sighed.
"I know you do. Hopefully you'll be able to attend her birth since you'll have already delivered," Mark said softly. He leaned down so that his arm was lying horizontally against the bar of the bed before he laid his head down on it. When Derek dropped his hand he moved his fingers up to card gently through his lover's hair.
Addison came back from where she had been explaining the rest of their birth plan to the staff that was going to be taking care of them. She had also run down to where Meredith was working in the pit to tell her that the babies were coming. "I'm glad to see that you made it back and didn't have a breakdown on the way here," she chuckled as she kissed her alpha mate.
"I'd like to think that you had at least a little bit more faith in me than that," he scoffed.
"You were really scared when I told you that my water broke," Derek teased sleepily. The pain meds that they had given to him since he was so early in his labor were making him really drowsy.
"Shush, you. Just focus on bringing our twins into the world, alright? Addy and I aren't going to leave you the entire time," Mark soothed.
The omega let him be soothed into the foggy, hazy place that George and Owen had talked about during their labors. He was aware of the contractions that he was having since he could still feel the pressure and his muscles contracting, even if the pain wasn't there anymore. Mark and Addison were by his side the entire time, and Meredith even called him on the phone to tell him how proud of him she was, but he could barely reply to her once she did. 
His contractions began to increase in intensity and frequency as the hours wore on. His cervix was still dilating evenly and he got the epidural just like he wanted to. That meant that he couldn't walk around like he got the impulse to, but Addison helped ebb away that urge. She had gotten up on the bed and helped him onto his knees so his thighs and calves were pressed together and separated so that his heavy stomach rested in between them. She wound his arms around her shoulders and neck as she rocked them back and forth soothingly. Mark sat behind him and rubbed his hips to try and soothe the uncomfortable muscle tension that happened with every contraction.
Counting the time that he was operating, he had been in labor for only six hours by the time that he was dilated enough to push. He was situated so that he had his feet in the stirrups and was almost sitting up entirely. He had Mark on one side and Addison the other. Addison was moping his forehead with a cool cloth and encouraging him to keep going with every push while Mark just held his hand and let the obstetricians in the room do what they needed to do.
It wasn't long before he was informed that he was crowning. He let out a long growl as he pushed as hard as he could to try and get the head out as quickly as possible. "Breathe, Derek, remember to breathe," Addison murmured when she saw what he was doing. He snapped and growled at her a little bit, but listened to her. 
The baby was born into the world after a small episiotomy, and immediately placed onto his chest. Mark had helped one of the nurses to move his hospital gown down so that his chest and part of his swollen stomach was exposed so that the infant could get immediate skin to skin. 
Derek's entire world shrank down and focused on the little one that was now on the outside of his bump rather than the inside. "Hi there," he whispered as he dropped both of the hands of the alphas and focused entirely on his pup. "You're finally here, you're finally here," he whispered.
"He's so beautiful, Derek," Addison murmured as tears began to develop in the corners of her eyes. 
He tore his eyes away from the pup for just a moment and looked to his wife. "I think this is Ash," he admitted. They had already picked out the names they wanted to use for the twins but hadn't figured out which names would go with which pup.
"Our little Ash Catherine," the alpha beamed as she looked over the little one. She cut the cord when the scissors were offered to her as the biological father of the little pup. The nurses then carefully removed the baby from the omega's chest after informing him what they were going to be doing. "Want me to go with him?" Addison asked carefully.
"No, I've gotta push again," he shook his head. 
She nodded and Mark gave him a swift kiss before he was pushing again. The second twin was born just as quickly as the first, and placed onto his chest again. The infant took a moment to wail, but was much louder than his brother once he finally decided that he could. Derek let out a small laugh, "Hi there. Oh, so loud. I bet what you just went through was so scary," he chuckled.
The same thing that happened with the Ash happened with the second baby, who they had decided to name Jake. The cord was cut by Mark, and then carefully taken off of Derek's chest to be cleaned up. The omega delivered then delivered both placentas with the careful coaching from the OB.
Everything that happened after that was a bit of a rush. He was stitched up in all of the places that he had torn before he was moved to the recovery room with his twins being moved into the room since they had gestated for long enough that they didn't need any NICU time. 
"I'm so proud of you," Mark sniffled as he looked over his omega's shoulder while Derek figured out how to feed his twins at the same time.
"I'm proud of me too," the omega teased, looking up at both of his alphas with a dopey smile on his face. "I've finally got pups now."
"You do," Addison nodded. "We're parents. I wasn't expecting to ever get to have this with you when we first mated."
They were quiet for a bit, letting the only sound be the little grunts from the suckling infants. "You'll let Meredith come in after the labor scent is gone, right?"
"That will probably be after you get discharged, unfortunately. But I'll take a picture of the pups and check on her," Mark nodded. He needed to see the other mate that he had gotten pregnant to make sure that she hadn't gone into labor or needed him.
After getting a soft kiss from his alpha he settled into the bed, happy that he had finally gone into labor and had his pups cuddled close to him.
7 notes · View notes
khaleesiofalicante · 2 years
Note
"Always remember that the crowd that applauds your coronation is the same crowd that will applaud your beheading. People like a show" - Terry Pratchett
I hate that she is so damn attractive smh
Fuck Camille!! Honestly just stop!!!
“You are trying to fix him,” Camille tuts and shakes her head. “Broken things cannot be fixed.” FUCKING NO! I will not take Magnus' slander here!!
Magnus had touched it once and it had belonged to him ever since. Just like Alec’s heart. I'M NOT CRYING😭💙
I love the way he knows he will become a better person for Magnus and that he will trust him to do what he wants and stay by his side and fight 🥺 but also that ending... FUCCKKKKK
Alec is getting shit done here😎
Even in the toughest of times, his family manages a way to give him the strength he needs. Not this being soft but also hurtful jdhdkfbfk
Because people love a good fucking sob story, don’t they? People love to feel sorry. I will quote him "Fuck this people, honestly!"!!!!!
Him missing when Rafe got an earring and when Max went to a championship tournament is so fucking painful but the way he tries so hard to be there, sending Max a message and helping Rafael with his essay, I-😭😭😭
He would rather lie about himself than expose someone’s truth without their permission. He would rather hurt himself than hurt others, I'm not ok :)
Max has a tendency to forget everything else when David is there.
///
He is in the car. David is asleep on his shoulder, wearing the medals now.
Not me ignoring all the pain in Timeline 3 for these two lines🙂
“Are you going to win an Olympic medal so you can pawn it?” Rafael asks incredulously.
“Yes,” Max says with a mouthful of toast. “That’s bad bitch behavior.”
“Weirdo,” Rafael chuckles.
Bad bitch behavior indeed😎
maximumlightwoodbane a family of winners + rafe 😂😂😂
They all have their phones on silent around Magnus. why did this hurt so much?!?!?
The face poets write about.
Alec could write a sad fucking poem right now.
About those wet eyes. About those trembling lips.
💔💔💔💔💔
“It’s my mama,” Magnus whispers – his eyes on the phone again. Fuck. This was so goddamn sad I hate it here😭😭 I just want my Magnus to stop hurting ok?!?!
“He cries from his chest,” Catarina had told him once. “That’s why it sounds like that.” can you hear my heart breaking?!?!
Weak turns into strong. Sick turns into survivor. Flip it. Flip it. Flip it. I love how thses scenes feel like some movie where everything is happening so fast but the sound on the background is like a constant and I LOVE WHEN THE WORDS ARE REPEATED THRICE- you get me? 😂
Luca and Catarina>>>>
NOT THE FUCKING LETTER. PLEASE NO😭but also I WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS SAID!!
Alec’s letter to Rafe got me emo🥺🥺🥺 and the list omfg
Guilt and gratitude are not emotions a child should associate with their parent. Louder for all the parents in the fucking world!!
“Are you dealing with emotional trauma after your dad acted like a little shit?” Max demands.
“Well,” Alec says. “Kinda?”
Max huffs out a breath. “Fine. One.”
no, no..he's got a point...
OMG I hope Jace stop giving poor Gabriel a hard time jdbdkdhdkdj
I need an emotionally sexy hug too tbh...
“All the time,” Izzy chuckles. “Your mess of a life is our favorite topic to discuss.” its a pretty good and chaotic gossip, no one can blame them...
CAN I QUOTE EVERYTHING SHE SAID??? LIKE... FUCK. IT WAS PERFECT. SHE IS SPILLING FACTS LIKE THE GODDAMN QUEEN SHE IS. I LOVED, LOVED, LOVED EVERYTHING SHE SAID OK?!? SHE IS SO RIGHT AND ON POINT WITH THE FACT THAT THEY ALL HAVE GROWN AND THAT THEY ARE STRONGER AND CAN FIGHT TOGETHER NOW AND THAT SHINYUN AND MAGNUS ARE NOT A THING AND I AM LOVE HER. GO IZZY GETTING SOME FUCKING SENSE IN HIS STUBBORN BRAIN!!
Her best advice “I think you should talk to Magnus about this,”  ✨YES✨
I KNEW IT!! SHE IS PREGNANT!! I'M GONNA CRY I FEEL SO HAPPY FOR HER🥺🥺🥺💙
Simon proposing to Izzy and Izzy announcing she is pregnant both on the group chat. That’s called badass couple behavior😎
Janie is the best💙💙💙
And Alec had fallen in love. Then and there. THEIR MEETING>>
No baby you are getting all this wrong!!! They don't love each other like that!!! I just want this miscommunication to stop😭😭
THAT FIGHT JFC JDHIDHDJD MY SANITY LEFT THE GRUOP CHAT!!!!
I get that Alec is scared for them both but.... FUCK!!! And also I get Max’s feelings but he is not letting Alec understand!!!
They both have some serious abandonment issues to work on...
“Then why the fuck didn’t you stop me?” Max screams.
Because I didn’t how to stop my own pain. How was I going to stop yours?
Just gonna say I added this to my fave tlnd quotes (yes I have a whole part in my notes for them jdhsjsbsj)
The worst thing that can happen to you as a parent is to see the part of you hate the most about yourself in the person you love the most in the world. YES I'M CRYING BUT SO ARE WE ALL😭😭😭
He doesn’t see Max. He only sees the ugliness Max has inherited from him.
///
Max who Alec had ruined
✨I'm in pain✨
“Dad. I didn’t mean it. Please. I didn’t fucking mean it.”
I know you didn’t, my baby.
THE WAY HE CALL HIM MY BABY😭😭😭
The brokenness of it is familiar.
He can almost taste that pain on his own tongue.
This is the voice of a boy whose heart is so broken you can hear the shards shifting under his chest.
Not my David, please. I just want everything to stop!!! 😭😭😭
The sound of a wounded animal.
It's the voice of a boy in unimaginable agony.
It's his Max.
BYE I'M GOING TO MAKE THIS ONE OF MY FAVE CHAPTERS AND REREAD THIS SCENE LIKE A HUNDRED TIMES KSVDLDNDKKDJ
Loved loved loved this.
Also your quote is just 😍😍😍. It’s also perfect for next chapter timeline 2 😬
Here is a mavid tiktok + Alec 😂😂😂
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soulyoh · 5 months
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Izzy, Brody,Geoff, and Courtney Brain Fart
To Izzy I give my times and experience of head budding my ex boyfriends sometimes because I got too excited about kissing them deeply instead of kissing I gave them a slight headache and head injury- never had a girlfriend because they just want to be friends but kiss me sometimes!? AHHH 😖
To Brody I give my times and experience I would my time with past lovers who would call me ugly and whore with no standards me just doing a little sexy dance redress myself then saying well beautiful I'm off to war called life, sick dick bro, but I gotta go! Let's never do this shit again! Then running off or something like in my heelys away from there clearly confused with just what happened because I am heavily under the influence of party shit. Then getting yelled at next week because I didn't remember their name or face!? Woah? It happens I would go the shrugged it off
To Geoff I give my times and experience of saying worse shit at the worst times like I was like hah yeah go bust a nut get that money up get her like pregnant i guess then cuts to them explaining they just finalized the divorce! I'm just clueless because that's what they said yesterday but oh okay my bad G. Bro you need lawyer and restraining order because shorty straight up got me afraid and I am messed up but damn bro yeah she's like another levels get my drift like bad onion or something!?
To Courtney I give my times and experience you the fact all boyfriends were running around everywhere saying they hate me the most, i forced them into this relationship, I'm the reason their cheating on me to anyone I mean anyone who could hear cut to me innocently buying them their favorite foods, cleaning up after them, comforting them after I said no to sex or staying home alone with them for the week because I am busy with my university and job. Magically hiding out in my tarot cards or their friends ambushed me with trying fight me to break up with him. Causing me to spiral because when doors closed they clinging on me, saying I love you every 10 minutes and throwing a hissy fits when I'm like I think we should take a break/I want to break up!
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doc-pickles · 3 years
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all roads they lead me here
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This is the last time you tell me I've got it wrong
This is the last time I say it's been you all along
This is the last time I let you in my door
This is the last time, I won't hurt you anymore
“Hey it’s Alex, leave me a message or whatever.”
“Alex, it's Jo. I just talked to your mom because you weren’t answering my calls and she said she hasn’t seen you or heard from you in awhile. So… please call me back. I just need to know you’re okay. I love you.”
“It’s me. It’s just been… A really long day and all I really want to do is curl up in bed with you. But you’re not here and you’re not in Iowa and I’m starting to worry that you’re dead in a ditch somewhere. Anyways I love you, please call me back.”
“Hi, it’s me again. Jo, you know your wife? The woman you married? I just… I’m worried about you and the longer I don’t hear from you the more worried I get. So please just call me back. I love you.”
“Alex, please pick up the phone. I don’t care where you are or what you’ve been doing. I don’t care if you’ve… committed murder or something. I don’t know, I just… I need you to answer me. If you’re not coming home I need to know so please just stop my wondering and answer me. Please. I love you, call me back.”
Alex sighed as he listened to the plethora of voicemails that Jo had left for him, her voice sounding more desperate the more messages she left. He wanted to call her, to answer one of her phone calls but he didn’t think it was fair to her. How was he supposed to drag her away from Seattle and everyone they loved to come to the middle of nowhere? How could he ask her to make that sacrifice when he was struggling to accept it himself?
As if hearing his thoughts, his phone screen lit up with a photo of Jo and him on their wedding day. Despite his doubts and worries Alex punched the green accept button and brought the phone up to his ear.
“Alex? Is that you?”
He only hesitates for a moment before letting out a sigh and answering, “Yeah it’s me.”
The relieved sigh and barely concealed tears break his heart as he listens to Jo on the other line. This was why he couldn’t go back, why he couldn’t face Jo again. Just hearing her on the other end of the phone was breaking his heart, he knew if he stood across from her and told her the choice he’d made that he would never be able to walk away.
“Oh my god, I thought you were dead,” Jo’s voice rang across the line, cries punctuating her words as she spoke a mile a minute. “Are you okay? You’re not hurt or in trouble or anything are you?”
“No… No, I'm okay. I’m fine I promise.”
“Good then where the hell are you,” Jo’s voice went from worried to stern in a flash, her tone almost scaring Alex as he listened to her. “I haven’t seen you in a month and a half and no one has been able to contact you for almost three weeks now. I thought you were lying in a coma somewhere so you better have a damn good reason as to why you haven’t been answering your phone.”
Of course she was angry, she had every right to be. If Alex were in Jo’s shoes he would’ve lost his mind trying to figure out where she was. But he wasn’t, instead he was lying in a hotel room thousands of miles away from Seattle keeping a huge secret from his wife who he normally told everything to. Alex let his eyes roam to the crisp white envelope on the bedside table next to him, Jo’s name in large letters across the front of it.
“It’s a long story, Jo.”
“Well start talking then Alex. I have been losing my mind here and I deserve an explanation,” Jo paused for a moment, her voice coming back clear and resolute when she spoke again. “If you’re leaving us, if you’re not coming home I need you to say it. I can’t keep sitting here playing back everything I’ve done trying to figure out what I did wrong.”
“Jo you haven’t done anything wrong, you could never,” Alex is quick to stop the destructive thoughts he knows are swirling around in Jo’s head. A deep pang of guilt hits him as he realizes that his lack of communication has probably torn her apart. “I’m just trying to figure some things out and… that might mean I don’t come back to Seattle.”
The line is silent and for a long moment Alex almost thinks that she’s hung up on him. Finally Jo speaks again, “You're telling me I didn’t do anything wrong but you’re not coming home? I don’t get it. Can you just tell me what's really happening?”
“I have kids.”
“I was going to-“
“With Izzie. She used the embryos and she has twins. We have twins,”
The all consuming silence from the other end of the line surrounds him once again. This time though, the pause felt like the heaviest thing he’d ever felt, the weight settling on his chest and taking his breath with it as he waited for Jo to respond to him.
“Oh.”
“Jo, I had no idea. I called Izzie before Mer’s trial and I was telling her all about you and then… then I heard them in the background. Alexis was singing some song and Eli was yelling at her to stop and I couldn’t not ask about them,” Alex let out a sigh as he ran a hand across his face. “They’re perfect Jo, god they're… They’re everything, the best of me and the best of Izzie. I have a chance to make this family whole, and I just hope you love me back enough to let me ta-“
“You have a family here too Alex! You have people that are depending on you and waiting for you to come home,” Jo was on the verge of tears and she yelled down the line, her voice trembling as she tried to get her point across. “Why didn’t you tell me? Or answer your phone? God Alex I love you but sometimes you can be so stupid. I’m looking up flights now, I can get there tomorrow afternoon.”
“No babe, I don’t need you to come out here.”
“Then tell me what I’m supposed to do! Because I’ve been sitting at home for the last month and a half waiting for you to come home and that didn’t do anything.”
Alex let out a sigh, his shoulders falling as he leaned back against the headboard of his hotel bed, “Jo I’m sorry but I have kids and I need to be here for them. I’ve already missed five years of their lives, I don’t want to miss anymore.”
“Then let me come out there Alex! If you’re planning on staying why won’t you let me come out,” the next pause that comes is from Alex as Jo let’s his silence answer her questions. “You really weren’t planning on coming back to me, were you?”
“Jo, please-“
“No Alex! You don’t just choose to end things without asking me! It's like the past seven years have meant nothing to you,” a steadying breath sounded over the line, Alex’s heart beating out of time as he listened to Jo. “You cannot just leave us here like garbage Alex. I deserve more than that, we deserve more than that! So either you come home or…. Fuck! I don’t know. Alex please.”
Alex thinks he can almost tangibly feel his heart breaking in two as Jo cries out to him. He loves her, more than anything he thinks, but he has children and their faces pop into his mind every second of the day now. He can’t fathom leaving them after already missing so much of their lives.
“Were you even planning on coming back home? Or were you just going to ignore my calls until I got the hint.”
“I didn't know she would have my kids, and now that she does, I don't know how to look anyone in the eye if I don't stay and do everything I can to make this work, make this a life, make this a family,” Alex’s pauses to catch his breath, listening to Jo’s cries. “I never meant to hurt you Jo-“
“Then you should’ve told me! You knew for weeks before you left and you didn’t say anything. You just kissed me and laughed at my jokes and ate dinner across from me crawled into bed next to me and made love to me like nothing was wrong. But the whole time you were just counting down the days until you left without another word,” her breaths are unsteady now, Jo hyperventilating on the other end of the phone in a way that makes Alex want to forget everything he’s seen in Kansas. “I can’t breathe, I can’t do this Alex. If you’re leaving us just say it. Please.”
“Jo, I’m sorry-“
“Just say it!”
“I wish getting everything I always wanted didn't have to hurt you in the process. But I can't lie to you. And I can't come home,” Alex is forcing the words out, barely able to say them without bursting into tears himself. “I'm not coming home, Jo. I can't face you. I can't look you in the eye because I wouldn't be able to walk away.”
“And that doesn’t mean anything to you? Everything we worked for, every uphill battle we fought to be together means nothing now? Did you ever think I would go with you, no questions asked,” Jo takes a deep breath before finishing. “I get that you have kids in Kansas, but you have a family here too Alex and we’ve been here for years, we’re always going to be here waiting and wondering and… I have to go. I love you and I’m sorry we weren’t enough.”
The line finally drops silent and Alex lets the tears he’d been holding back fall. He thinks he’s making the right choice, being there for his kids and giving them what he and Jo never had as children. But the pain and aching in his heart make him second guess his decision, if only for a moment.
-
It’s two days after his phone call with Jo when Alex realizes that he might have royally screwed everything up. His eyes follow Eli and Alexis around the farmyard as Izzie tells him about their life.
“We were actually in Tacoma before moving out to Kansas. Well, really it was just me but I was already four months pregnant by the time I decided to move,” Izzie let a chuckle out as Alex’s brain began to work overtime. “Somehow we made it though, I swear those two have been keeping me on my toes since they were in the womb.”
Alex ran back Jo’s words from their conversation in slow motion. He had played them over and over again in his head since she’d hung up on him but now he realized they might have a new meaning.
“If you’re leaving us, if you’re not coming home I need you to say it.”
“You have a family here too Alex!”
“You cannot just leave us here like garbage Alex. I deserve more than that, we deserve more than that!”
“We’re always going to be here waiting and wondering.”
“I love you and I’m sorry we weren’t enough.”
Sure she might have meant Meredith and her kids and the family he’d found for himself in Seattle but Alex knew Jo better than that.
“You know what I mean,” Izzie’s voice snapped Alex out of his daze, his eyes glassy as he looked from his hands to the blonde next to him. “You okay?”
“I uh… I think my wife is pregnant.”
+
It’s nearly 10 PM when a knock sounds on the loft door. Jo almost doesn’t get up from her spot on the couch as her fatigued body sinks into the cushions, reasoning with herself that anyone of importance has a key. When there’s another knock however, she begrudgingly drags herself up to slide the metal door open.
“Oh my god…”
Standing in front of her is Alex, eyes tired and hair damp from the near constant downpour of Seattle rain. She tries to ignore the suitcase at his feet, not wanting to get her hopes up when they’d already been so crushed just a week before when she’d spoken to him.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I walked away from you and from all of this,” Alex runs a hand through his hair, his gaze floating to the ceiling as he struggles to keep his composure. “I want to be here Jo, you mean everything to me.”
“How am I supposed to believe that? How am I supposed to let you back in when I know you were about to leave me without a word,” she’s begging herself not to cry right now, she’s done enough of that in the past week. But her stupid hormones bring tears to her eyes that she tries unsuccessfully to blink away. “Alex, you were ready to walk away from everything we’ve built without so much as a goodbye!”
“I know but-“
“But what?! Izzie sent you back home? Your conscience suddenly crawled back into your body after taking a two month vacation,” Jo’s voice rises as she stares Alex down. “What do you think you could possibly say that would make this better?”
Alex takes a step forward and Jo can’t bring herself to step away from him. Her mind is swirling, tears stinging her eyes as she meets his gaze, “Jo, I’m sorry.”
“Well sorry doesn't fix everything Alex.”
There’s a quiet moment between them as they stand mere inches from each other, eyes locked but no words exchanged. Alex does look remorseful, like every decision he had excluded her from is finally weighing heavily on his shoulders.
“I’m not going back to Kansas. Well, I’m not staying there at least,” Jo blinks up at Alex, waiting for him to continue before she says anything else. “I love my kids, god they're perfect, but that’s not where I belong. And I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize that, I’m sorry it took you yelling at me to realize that because it just confirmed that I should’ve talked to you as soon as I found out.”
Alex takes another step forward, his chest almost touching hers as his hand comes up to cradle the curve of her stomach that one of his old shirts had hidden. In the month and a half that he’s been gone Jo’s figure had curved outward significantly, the baby bump now noticeable no matter what she wore. She’s not sure how he’d figured it out, but the simple act breaks the flimsy hold she has on her emotions. Instead of the tears she’d become so used to though, Jo finds herself overwhelmed with anger as she pushes away from Alex.
“If this is why you're back you can turn around and leave again.”
"It's not…. Well it is but it's not the only reason."
"Alex!”
“Just listen please. I'm not back because we're having a baby, I’m back because you being pregnant made me realize how stupid I was being when I decided to move to Kansas. Eli and Alexis... They're amazing, but they were amazing before I got there too. And I don't want to be a dad without you by my side. I want it all with you Jo and I know that might be hard to believe right now but-“
Before Alex finished his statement Jo had launched herself into his arms, tears staining his shirt where she had her face pressed against his chest, "I'm still pissed at you but these stupid hormones all telling me to give you another chance.”
“Thank god, I didn't have a backup plan if you kicked me out again.”
"But,” Jo leaned up and fixed Alex with a serious look. "This is your last chance. If you EVER screw up this badly again…”
“I won't.”
Jo leans back, pressing her lips to Alex’s as she pulled him into the loft, “Welcome home.”
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I have started planning little one or two shot stories for after I graduate this spring because I will finally have the time to write creatively.
I’m thinking it might be fun to make a saucy little story set in kind of the early days a little after Hornigold gave Sam command of the Marianne.
Jack gets to answer the very important question of “can you be cuckolded if you’re not even in a relationship?” And the answer is yes.
Izzy had formerly been on the Ranger with Jack and Ed, but got persuaded by Sam to come over to the Marianne for a while. Jack eventually notices this and goes to investigate, because Izzy, as a genera rule, doesn’t stray too far from his assignments or routines, and this is a pretty big deviation.
cut to Jack making his way over to the Marianne where he eventually gets into Sam’s cabin and finds Izzy sitting in Sam’s lap back to chest and they are both very naked and very obviously having sex. While Izzy and Sam are initially startled at being walked in on and Sam was pretty sure he had locked the door, Jack does get invited to go down on Izzy.
Jack is somewhere between happy that he gets to do this much with Izzy and feeling very pathetic that Sam got here first and seems to be doing his level best to get Izzy pregnant. Jack has never been more dedicated to doing his best job ever and Izzy’s brain is mush by the time Jack and Sam are done with him.
At the end, Sam is smug as hell while Izzy gets a little plug slid into him before he’s put to bed and Jack gets to go back to the Ranger and have a desperate and kind of sad jerk off in his hammock. Jack does get invited back from time to time and after a few months Izzy’s definitely starting to get a curve to his belly. Jack probably rubs his dick raw because he might not be the one to fuck Izzy but it’s still pretty fuckin hot.
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5ammi90 · 3 years
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Rewatching Greg’s Anatomy (spoilers)
Chief Webber is a hypocrite.
Addison is also a hypocrite. She cheated on Derek (with his best friend) and yet she feels justified in being horrible to Derek and Meredith.
Kinda dislike that Adele suggests that Derek should give Addison a chance just cause that was she did with Richard.
Derek is kinda to blame because he didn’t tell Meredith about being married.
I also don’t like that Addison deceives Derek about how many times she cheated on him with Mark. She makes it seem like a one time thing but she was pregnant with his (Mark’s) kid and Mark says that it was months before Derek walked in on them.
Derek is an idiot.
I do feel real bad for Meredith.
Miranda is brilliant and I love her.
Derek is still an idiot.
“Stop being an adulterous bitch” dang Derek tell her how you really feel.
She gave him divorce papers if he truly wanted her gone he would have signed them but he’s still being misled with inaccurate information.
I love Nurse Tyler.
Bit annoyed that Derek gave Meredith false hope but at the same time think Meredith knew he wasn’t gonna sign the papers.
There were three in the bed and Georgie said “shhhhhh sleep”.
“Not going to beg you to want me” end of episode begs him. Way to stay strong there Meredith.
Once again poor Meredith.
Someone tell Derek what to do, dude is struggling.
I hate that he actually goes to Joe’s but still tries to stay with Addison and be happily married or whatever.
I love how Joe was diehard for Meredith and Derek to fix things. Joe is so disappointed in Derek, I love Joe.
He picked her, so what the hell happened. He’s kinda being a ass by acting like this then dropping her like a hot potato.
Season 1 Meredith is adorable and I love her.
Drunk Meredith is so cute and has no filter and I love her.
Also why are Derek and Addison even bothering, they spend most of their time arguing and even then they don’t actively try to find a common ground
Season 2 episode 8 should be renamed ‘reasons Derek and Addison shouldn’t be together”
I love Alex and Meredith together, there friendship gives me life
Out of everyone in “MAGIC” Izzie is my least favourite
Noooooooooooo not Denny Duquette. I like Denny I like JDM but I hate this stupid arc. Izzie is an absolute idiot and could have been kicked or worse jailed. Personally I think she should have been kicked but that’s my opinion. Don’t even get me started on the fact that they knew Denny was prone to blood clots and they didn’t have something in place after he went through major surgery. His death could have been prevented. I’m still not over this, anyway I hate this storyline so much
Derek is such a bitch sometimes
“Too young for cancer” cancer doesn’t have an age limit. I hate that line
He ate his novel 🤣🤣🤣🤣 that will never fail to make me laugh
Derek and Meredith are ridiculous and I love their stupidity
I hate Bex’s parents. Can’t believe they were going to go through with a surgery procedure and not inform their daughter
Derek what on earth are you doing. Why did you not tell Meredith
Detective Alex is on the case. Whoop 🙌
Thought the mum was gonna faint when she saw George cutting her kids hair
Chief Webber has pissed off the nurses and they are gonna stab him
I love Mrs Larson, she is awesome
Go off Yang you tell that mean brain surgeon
I know it’s a show and it’s not real but THERE IS A DOG IN THE HOSPITAL. That is so not sanitary
George is the best.
George and Izzie can’t shift Meredith, bring out the big guns Cristina
George when he hugs and then lifts Bailey kills me every time
Also Alex screaming at the woman 🙃🙃
George, Dr Webber and Derek acting like a nervous father is hilarious
Baby is on the way and Tucker was in a car crash
BOMB IN THE OR
Run for your tiny lives
Derek gets so offended that Addison can call Bruke by his first name and he can’t. I live for the pettiness of this show
Dumbass got shot with a bazooka and no one thought to tell the paramedics
RUN ALEX RUN
If the doctor thing doesn’t work out Alex could go for track
Ok so next time Meredith has a feeling no one go to work and she especially can’t leave the house
Why have none of the inters been told about a code black?? Like you think this would important information
Dr Milton is a bit of a dick but I can understand his reasoning. The pink mist story is horrifying, also way to help Hannah stay calm there Milton
Also I get that Hannah was scared but she could have killed herself, Dr Burke, Meredith and Derek’s team not to mention they are right next to/on top of the gas main line and that could kill a bunch of people
Bomb in the building and you think it’s a good time to have sex. Real smart there gang
Addison is terrified, I wanna wrap her in a blanket and give her hug
“May not be as bad as it seems” you just had to say that
It’s about to get worse, poor Hannah
Damn it Meredith
No one tell Derek about Meredith it won’t end well
I love how Burke is like Cristina you need to leave this isn’t just another cool surgery. My man she is here for Meredith and she leaves cause Meredith tells her too
Meredith could die. Izzie starts laughing, you are such a good person and friend
Cristina is smart, she doesn’t tell Derek about Meredith. Cristina has all the brain cells in MAGIC.
Bailey is having a bad time, but yay George to the rescue.
Alex, Izzie I don’t give a crap about your relationship right now, there is a bomb in the hospital. Priorities people.
Richard has discovered the gas main line, oh nose.
Oh yeah Richard has a heart attack. Forgot about that, wait never mind seems like it was a panic attack.
Dylan what are you talking/thinking about, actually I just remembered what happens to Dylan so I’ll cut him some slack.
“Can we drug her” “against her will” “no, well” this is a thing of beauty.
It’s okay Addison take some deep breaths babes. In and out nice and slow, it’s all good.
Oop George found Hannah.
Moving with a bomb in a body on a gurney. This will end well, nothing could possibly go wrong 😑.
I’m so glad Meredith and Dylan took the time to talk about their mutual dislike of each other.
We had a bump, way to amp up the tension, I know the outcome but I’m still terrified that it will just go off.
George take her down (shhhh Addison George knows what he’s doing) go George, if he isn’t named godfather I call bullshit. Does the baby get George for a middle name?? I’ll answer that question in a minute, William George Bailey Jones, I knew it was something but I couldn’t truly remember.
It’s funny somethings I remember so vividly but other things are just gone.
Yang don’t tell him, you told him and now Tucker is flatlining. I take back what I said about brain cells.
Oh hey they’re playing breathe. Lol all I can see is Lexie, damn the musical episode. Dylan has turned into Derek, the power of imagination.
Baby is born, Tucker has came back to life but I think Derek cracked a rib and the bomb squad are now pink mist. Bye Dylan.
Meredith was yeeted onto the floor, poor Dylan. Shake it off Meredith, I’m sure your fine. Well Derek and Burke are fine, good to know.
Love how Derek is looking frantically for Meredith and even says “where is she” but Richard and Adele think he’s looking for Addison. Adele realising he’s looking for a different “she” is brilliant, Derek should have known that she was with Cristina in the locker room.
A wild Derek has appeared, nothing comes from this visit. Derek please put yourself and everyone else out of there misery. As a man who has gotten back with his wife you should not remember this much detail about the last kiss you had we Meredith. Please for love of everything stop this from dragging out.
I think this shit drags out for 15 more episodes.
Dancing Cristina is crazy and I love her but at least Burke joins in on the madness unlike Owen (ass that he is) dang it Burke knows about the apartment.
Shit Meredith has found out about Richard and the affair. Run Meredith run.
Yay Mark, Mark has been punched.
I love Richards reaction to the punch.
I love Mark and Merediths friendship. They amuse me with the dirty mistress club.
George has turned into a “nice guy”.
Derek is gonna kill a bitch, Mark could potentially die soon.
She lied, it’s wasn’t a one time thing and Derek needs to be told. Would yall just stop beating this poor dead horse.
George, this is the most terrible mistake you could ever make. She will never love you like that, this will only end in tears.
Crap, Denny is back. Poor Alex.
Addison is having a minor breakdown and we are trying to support and comfort her but it ain’t working.
Alex shocks Denny cause he’s jealous 😂🤣🤣🤣.
This show is 100% on drugs, I’m obsessed.
Izzie you can’t fully blame Meredith, you were the one who kept encouraging him even though you no there was no chance in hell she’s like him the way he likes her. Yay Callie’s here, didn’t like her with George but I do kinda love her.
We’re in the elevator again, Derek what are you smoking. Bailey is awesome and I love her. I love Derek in this scene because he’s so elated and it amuses me so much.
“Just friends” I call bull on that.
Derek legit just implied he thinks Meredith is a whore. All because he’s butthurt that she’s finally moving on.
Derek is an idiot.
Also I feel bad for Addison she finally figured out what everyone else already knew.
Oh god, I hate everything that’s about to happen. She cuts the wire and Burke has been shot and even though I know what coming I’m gonna be super pissed at everything that’s happening.
Izzie is so stupid right now, she could have ended up in jail.
Great, Cristina just discovered Burke has been shot. Burke can’t move his arm which sucks for him. Izzie is still a absolute idiot. Yes Cristina GO OFF ON HER.
Meredith telling everyone to shut the hell up give me life. Also Denny chiming in to say Meredith is the one to listen too pleases me so much.
Uncle Richard is on a war path run Brian run.
Burke lung collapsed, which fun times are happening. Someone need to help him and quickly.
I love Alex and Izzie doesn’t deserve him. I mean I know he cheated but after everything that happens with Denny and the whole cancer thing. She just becomes horrible and I hate her. I also hate what she does to Callie.
That is something that annoys me. Izzie knows nothing about Denny and yet she risks prison. She should have been kicked out of the program and banned from working in any other hospital. She got off way too lightly and I know she gets cancer but that doesn’t make up for the fact that she cut the LVAD wire and could have been arrested for murder. So be kicked from the program and barred from working in any hospital wouldn’t have been so bad. It just pisses me off that she doesn’t get reprimanded for her actions.
Burke is a hand down. Derek fuck ups Burke’s brain, oops.
Adele, he couldn’t really let so many people stay, they could have ended up being in the way.
Derek you are an idiot and I’m starting to want to shake you and your stupid head.
Burke is asking for Cristina. Bailey has now realised she has no idea where Cristina is and then she realises that she has no idea where the other sucks up are. This is gonna end well. Alex is safe cause he’s at Mercy West.
Denny is freaking the hell out. Could an actual Doctor com……oh thank god, Bailey’s here and she is about to go off. I need popcorn.
Here comes the downward spiral of Cristina and Burke’s relationship.
I hate the fact that after everything that happens he still dies. It was AVOIDABLE but no they had to kill him off. I hate this stupid storyline.
Derek stop starring at Meredith you didn’t pick her, suffer.
She is definitely freaking out Finn.
Don’t make eye contact with him. Dang it Meredith. This is gonna end badly. Stop looking at her Derek, you aren’t helping. Goddamit Derek. You could have avoided all of this if you didn’t have a stupid sense of obligation. Great now you’ve messed up. So much for celibacy. The side eye Callie gives Derek 🤣🤣🤣. What do you mean ‘what does this mean’ you kissed her and you chose to go back to Addison so shut up dumbass.
Bye Denny. I’m sad that Denny is dead but thank fuck this storyline is over.
Alex get her out of there. JDM is doing brilliant at staying still, it’s very impressive. No not ‘chasing cars’ I can’t handle that, my emotions.
Addison knows. Derek you ain’t subtle. Poor Finn. Boys leave her alone.
Oh joy season 3 is a go. She ran away, course she did. Poor Addison??? Don’t know how I feel bout this.
Break down that door Meredith. Oh flashback episode, fun times are ahead.
Love how Cristina just knows Meredith did something stupid. Her face 🤣🤣🤣🤣. I forgot Addison put the underwear on the notice board.
Alex is taking charge.
Poor Adele. Four teenagers and one is the mum.
Derek and George are stuck in a room together. Someone is gonna die.
He throws her clothes out into the rain and then he throws her out. I love this. He let her back in, this man I swear. Bye Derek.
The ticking clock thing is such a smart segway. It works to show that we have traveled in time. Also Derek stole Alex’s apple, rude.
Callie is 100% right. I never truly thought about the fact that doctor are in school for 10 years (roughly).
See Meredith you knew exactly what to say to Izzie.
The meeting of Meredith and Derek. Awwww cuties. I miss this Derek and Meredith, I’m sad that there relationship never really went back to what it was. Like I understand things had changed but you think over time they might have been able to getting back to the inside jokes and teasing and flirting. Instead it seems as if the relationship stopped and never really recovered.
Poor Omar. If I could turn back time, if I could find a way……sorry Bailey said the magic words. Cher took over my soul for a second.
Derek is stupid. He gets jealous that Meredith is sleeping with other people. He get upset when she tries to have a proper relationship and move on. He belittles her and looks so smug that she pines over him. He doesn’t seem to understand that he can’t have his cake and eat it too. He chose Addison and he has yet to truly accept that. It annoys me so much how he has acted but at the same time I want to give him so leeway because he was betrayed by his wife and his best friend. Although I will say that doesn’t excuse him with everything he’s done. Bad Derek. You made the wrong choice, you should have signed the papers and walked away from both of them for a hot minute. He should have taken the time to process everything instead of making rash decisions.
Now he’s gonna leave the ball in Meredith’s court and say he’s in love with her after all the shit he’s pulled. Throw him out on his fluffy hair Meredith, just kick him. So Meredith has been hurt, Addison has been hurt and Derek has been hurt as well as hurt others. Yall are stupid and I hate you. Rewatching this it makes a lot of sense that Meredith gives up when she falls into the water. Cause honestly I would have gave up as well.
Cristina is having a breakdown. Someone help her. Burke don’t leave her (stupid thing to ask).
Oh great we’re back to elevator moments. Bad Derek. Need a spray bottle to stop him misbehaving.
Cristina and Burke got caught by Burke’s mother. Oh the shame, oh the embarrassment.
Yes Meredith flip a coin to chose who to date. That will work out well.
Addison’s getting shit faced. Fair enough bitch.
Derek. BE SUBTLE FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING. STOP STARRING AT MEREDITH. DAMN IT DEREK. SUBTLE!!!! Please be SUBTLE!!!
The underwear has been found. Callie to the rescue, we love and appreciate you. Meredith grovel at her feet and thank her for what she did for you.
Shit mama Burke is here. Run Cristina run.
SUBTLE DEREK PLEASE BE MORE SUBTLE. I CAN’T WITH YOU I JUST CAN’T
Call him out Meredith. Go off and tell him how much of an ass he is. Yes Meredith kick him to the curb.
I love Callie she is the best.
I love Benjamin because he described Derek perfectly. Hot and arrogant. Nailed it.
Finn knowing Meredith was working and knowing Izzie is going through a difficult time came to check on her and brought her lunch even though he hardly knows her. He still did it because he knows Meredith is worrying about Izzie. Why did she not chose him. I mean I get that Derek is attractive but he’s also an ass. I mean he’s G Callen, why wouldn’t you chose him.
Addison has given up and I love super drunk Addison. She’s trying to eat every muffin in that basket. Addison sweetheart you knew you had lost Derek the second you slept with Mark. Give up and move on okay baby, move on. We are here for you but please put down the alcohol.
Flipped a coin and she isn’t happy with how it landed.
Finn and Derek walk into a bar to be told she’s gonna date them both and then decide. May the best guy win. Put the rulers away boys.
George has absolutely terrible timing.
Alex is such a bitch and I love him for it.
Derek is apologising and Mark is in the shower. Oops.
I love Mark so much.
I love how confident and unapologetic Callie is.
Also Mark just letting Addison ramble and then grabbing her is stupid funny but I’m here for.
George is really horrible and it’s not fair to Callie because she truly loves him.
Bailey out here laying down the law and she ain’t taking no for a answer.
Derek looking for approval from Cristina and her just being like ‘meh’ is the funniest thing that’s happened for a while.
Addison let’s Alex free and he jumps for joy when she’s not looking. 🤣🤣.
Oh the girl who can’t feel pain, yeah I remember this one.
Addison. You can’t just slap a man with that smile. Dang girl.
Cristina and Alex betting on whether Derek will show up to challenge Finn to a duel is peak comedy. Also I love when Derek shows because he has no clue how to react. He eventually decides to mark his territory like a dog. Jesus Derek, you are such a Bitch.
I really don’t know what Meredith was expecting. Of course this was gonna happen. Stop being stupid and pick one (Finn) please put us all out of our misery. Love how she takes the ice cream and leaves them outside.
What is it with New Yorkers and ferry boats???
Awww Alex over here taking care of Izzie.
Oh yeah appendicitis.
Uh oh Mark is here and wearing a white coat. There is gonna be a fight. Oop. Meredith threw up and a patient tried to light a cigarette while wearing an oxygen line. Just a normal day at Seattle Grey.
Meredith is acting like she’s watching a tennis match. Drugged up Meredith is just as fun as drunk Meredith. Drugged up Meredith has spotted a wild Addison. This is gonna end badly but it will be hilarious.
I feel like Derek is gonna make another stupid decision. Also Mark and Meredith are fun together.
He did the stupid thing. Idiot.
Bye Finn but in my opinion she’s also an idiot and the two of them deserve each other in there idiocy.
I’m done for tonight, I’m losing brain cells with this relationship.
Shit. Addison told Derek. Derek is gonna scream.
Derek is pissed because he has lost Meredith for nothing again. Poor Derek.
Mark you are hitting the nail right on the head. Derek is two seconds away from killing a hoe.
Shit, Derek’s sister has appeared. I hate Nancy so much, so so much. She puts all the blame on Derek and she’s just such a bitch to him.
“McDreamy was doing the McNasty with a McHottie?” “That McBastard” this gives me life and I quote it way too much.
Mark is such an asshole to Alex and I hate him for it.
I love this so much. Derek steps off the elevator sees his sister, Addison and Mark. Immediately get back on the elevator. Beautiful.
Poor Greg. His little girl isn’t his little girl.
Alex should have stayed in paediatrics he would have been absolutely brilliant. (Turns out he does, I just haven’t reached that part yet)
Greg is a better man than most in his situation.
Alex knows about Mark and Callie. He’s definitely gonna tell George.
Oh god the camping episode. Derek, Burke, Richard, George, Alex oh and Joe and his boyfriend. Camping. This is gonna end beautifully. Mark is the only guy who wasn’t invited.
Oh god Sydney is back. Her happiness makes me wanna puke.
George and Alex having a slap fight while Burke and Derek bet over whose gonna win.
Yay Derek and Meredith are sorta maybe back together. That’s gonna last like 3 episodes. I have no faith in these idiots.
Izzie had no right. She absolutely had no right.
This whole episode is stupid and I hate it.
Oh no it’s the stupid adult conjoined twins. They are so annoying.
I love how Bailey wants blood.
I’m sad about papa O’Malley.
That dinner is one of the most awkward and funniest things I’ve ever seen.
Poor Callie has been broken and the poor girl needs some ice.
Meredith is over here hanging out with dead people.
‘You aren’t dead until you are warm and dead’ that’s a phrase
Denny and Dylan fighting is hilarious. Also her been so happy to see Doc gives me so much joy. Dylan being like ‘you are deader than dirt dead’ and Denny jumping in like we need to do this delicately. Oh hey the scrub nurse and Bonnie are here.
Ellis Grey annoys the hell out of me.
Cristina is having a minor breakdown but she’ll be fine. Y’all she went to the dollar store. She’s also decided to drink. Someone give her a hug.
Awww boo Doc left. Meredith is a very confused poor bean.
I really don’t like how Izzie treats Callie. She’s jealous but she has never actually noticed George before he got married to Callie. She was fine with Callie and George dating but for some reason marriage has drove her off the deep end.
Derek is not coping well. Someone hug him.
Oh yay Dylan’s back. He’s gonna hit her with the truth.
Oh shit Derek is about to go off on Ellis. Damn it Addison don’t interrupt him. Derek is breaking down, help him Addison.
Lay it all on the table Denny. Tell her how bad it’s gonna be if she stays. I didn’t say disappear.
Oh dang Ellis is dying. Bye bitch.
Oh yay Doc’s back. Never mind.
The way Denny can sense Izzie kind of freaks me out but it’s still kinda sweet.
Meredith is having a minor breakdown. Derek is gonna kill Ellis if she dies.
Bailey is not about to let Meredith die on her table. She is not giving up.
Cristina is gonna yell Meredith back to life.
Oh well Ellis is dead. RIP I guess.
Meredith. Run bitch. SHE LIVES.
Oh yay Alex has moved in. Fun times ahead.
Found a storyline I hate more than the Denny Duquette storyline and it is AVA I hate her sooooooo much. Oh my god she gives Alex the absolute run around and it’s upsets me so much.
Oh right this is when Addison has sex with Alex. Why couldn’t she and Alex be a couple instead whatever the mess was between Izzie and Alex. (Like it might have been more of a fling but still better than him and Izzie)
The start of Cristina and Callie’s friendship, woo.
Mark just saw Addison and Alex. Poor Mark but he was 100% naive in this situation.
Poor Addison, she’s alone again.
Also Derek is an absolute idiot. Just cause Richard lost his wife when he was Chief that doesn’t mean Derek will lose Meredith.
Oh no mama Burke is here and so is Cristina’s mum. Cristina is gonna crack. Also I kinda liked Cristina and Burke together, I mean they did have some rough spots but they genuinely seemed happy. 10 times better than her and Owen. (Sucks that Burke’s actor is a homophobic ass)
I don’t like the little side story Addison goes on. It seems pointless. (I know it’s for a spin off but it still sucks)
Callie is gonna kill Cristina.
Also Derek is still an idiot and is giving up on someone who has finally realised she has intimacy issues and is currently trying to work through it. Although I do understand he is working through some stuff as well.
Oh yeah, Addison wants a baby. Poor Addison.
Oh crap Susan has hiccups. ☹️
Thatcher is an ass.
Oh no Adele.
George and Izzie can just piss off. I hate what they do to Callie.
Dang it, Lexi is here. I really don’t like her at the start. I mean eventually she grows on me but right now she can do one.
Oh great here comes the break up of Burke and Cristina as well as Derek and Meredith. I’m kinda sad about Cristina and Burke because there was some moments that they seemed genuinely happy together. Like when he came home to her dancing and she just pulled him over to dance with her. It was really sweet. Anyway they were a lot better than Owen and Cristina. Owen is an absolute dickhead.
Derek and Meredith breaking up (again) means Rose is gonna show up. I really don’t like Rose and it’s not because she dates Derek it’s more to do with the fact that she has no personality. She is a cookie cut out and she’s literally just there to be Derek’s love interest. If we actually got to know her and she showed some kind of personality then maybe but she’s just boring. (Also she lets the relationship interfere with working in the OR)
Someone Meredith cared about died and her father slapped her and banned her from the funeral. So when she apologises for not talking to him he says that he met a pretty woman and flirting with her was the highlight of his week. It just seemed cruel and out of character from him.
Mama took her eyebrows.
Izzie get the fuck over yourself. Jesus.
It wasn’t an accident. They tried to kill the dude.
I feel so bad for George and definitely bad for Bailey. She got passed over for chief resident and feels like she failed George and there is the whole Denny issue.
I’m actually upset about Cristina and Burke.
Meredith tell the guests ‘it’s over’ but really saying it to Derek is sad.
Poor Cristina.
Bailey yelling at Alex will wacking him on the arm. Just the weight being lifted off of both their shoulders. It’s so amusing.
Found out the true reason why “Burke” left. The actor who played him made a homophobic comment about “George” in front of “Derek”. “Izzie” went off on him.
Oh no. Not Norman.
Really old guy is awake. Woo.
‘I’m young. I’m a fetus.” Dr Derek Shepherd season 4 episode 3: let the truth sting. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I love Derek this episode. He does not hold back on anything.
Meredith has finally told Derek that she wants to make it work and actually try to fight the fact that she wants to run. He then tell her he wants to build a house for them. The day after she says she wants to properly try. Derek no, she has commitment issues, read the room my dude.
Poor Miranda. I love how Derek has became her person.
I love that Mark doesn’t like Rose and is rooting for Meredith.
Yay Addison’s back.
I love Addison calling out Derek about him and Meredith breaking up.
One point. One stupid point. It absolutely sucks that the only reason he has to repeat is one point. I would hate to have that knowledge.
“Shut up and let me work” yes Cristina.
The stupid candle floor plan. Whatever, they are back together so I don’t care.
Oh crap Owen’s here. He’s not my favourite at all. I mean I like him at some points but god I hate the way he is with any woman he’s dating. I also hate how he treats Cristina after she get the abortion.
Derek seriously annoys me sometimes. Telling Alex and Izzie that they are going to move out without even asking Meredith if she’s okay with kicking them out.
Oops.
I love this scene with Izzie and Derek and Alex. It’s way too funny.
Oh dear Derek poked the bear called ‘mummy issues’
George is amazing and is an amazing doctor.
Oops, wrong room.
HE PASSED BITCHES!!!! WOO
The Shepherd method. Oh shit.
He’s literally asking you if you’re exclusive and you’re making a much bigger deal out it by thinking he’s bored. How in the hell did you make it through med school with that kinda logic. I hate Izzie.
Oh god no the pigs. I now remember why there was a disclaimer at the start of this episode.
Meredith carrying around anatomy Jane and using it to show the kid where the tumour is makes my day.
BISEXUAL. It’s a thing Callie you don’t just have to like one or the other. You can like both, boys and girls.
Mark flirting with Cristina is hilarious because she completely misses the fact that he is flirting with her.
She’s seeing Denny. Cancer.
Erica’s gone, yay but also I’m sad about it.
Oh fuck Sadie. I completely forgot about Sadie. I absolutely hate Sadie.
I love Derek and Cristina bonding over been kicked out of bed.
I hate Denny but dang I love JDM.
I don’t care I don’t care I don’t care about Izzie Stevens. I don’t care, skip to her dying already.
Owen you are sending a lot of mixed signals here and you need to work on that.
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jobrookekarev · 3 years
Text
My Sweet Joy, Always Remember Me
Chapter one of one 
Words: 8715
Summary: In the midst of quarantine, Levi convinces Jo to download Tik Tok, and she quickly becomes addicted. So when a certain trend comes around, Jo couldn't pass up the opportunity to poke fun at the man who left her. Back in Kansas, one of Alex's teenage patients shows him the video of Jo and Luna, and he instantly goes back to Seattle to meet the girl he assumes is his daughter, only to find that Jo has another surprise in store for him.
Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy
Relationship: Alex Karev/Jo Wilson.
Characters: Alex Karev, Jo Wilson, Levi Schmitt, Luna Ashton, Izzie Stevens (Mentioned), Eli Stevens (Mentioned), and Alexis Stevens (Mentioned).
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences.
Additional Tags: Angst and Fluff, Babies, Pregnancy, Tik Tok, The Intimacy of napping together, Rated T for swearing.
Read at AO3
Read at FFN
AN: Did I write a fic about a Tik Tok? Yes. Do I regret it? Absolutely not! Link to the Tik Tok this is based on: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMebyxQeQ/
A big thank you to the jolex group chat for once again distracting me from what I should be writing with ideas of what I could be writing. They supplied some of the lines and ideas for this story, and I am thankful for all of their help and support. 
……………………………………………………………………
It was a slow June day on the Pediatric Ward at the Children's Hospital where Alex worked in Kansas City. Ever since the pandemic, things had slowed down, although he still had his regular surgical patients. 
“Hey Marco,” Alex said, coming into the room of the teenage patient. He had assisted in a leg amputation due to cancer on the kid a few days ago and was eager to see how he was progressing.
“Hey, Dr. Alex, do you have Tik Tok?” Marco asked as he still looked at his phone but even bothered to glance at Alex as those little clips of music played.
“Nope,” Alex said as he checked over the kid’s vitals and pulled the bandage back to look at the incision. “Everything looks good. Are you having any pain?”
“Not really, you guys got me on the good stuff,” Marco replied, giving him a nod as his mask hid his smile, and Alex could tell that he was a little bit out of it. “Okay, but you have got to see this one. I think it's you?”
Alex's eyebrows came together. He didn't know anybody in his life that would make a Tik Tok of him. Except maybe Zola, but according to Meredith, she mostly just made dance videos. Nonetheless, he went over to Marco’s bedside and waited for him to pull up the video expecting to see Zola. Alex was, however, surprised when a video of him and Jo popped up. 
“I'll never forget you,” the artist sang over the video. “They said we'd never make it.” 
The video was of the two of them on their wedding day as they kissed and then turned to the crowd, all smiles, and the little caption read. “To the man who left me in a letter, thanks for the gift.”
The video changed and suddenly, it was a video of Jo sitting in a rocker in the loft holding a baby. She smiled at the camera before tilting it down to the baby in her arms, who looked up at the camera with newborn colored big blue eyes from where she was swaddled in a pink blanket. 
“My sweet joy, always remember me.” 
“Sorry, man,” Marco said, having read the expression on Alex's face. “The videos are funny but, it's a sucky way to find out you got a kid.”
Alex just stood there in shock as the video replayed again before he grabbed the phone. He waited for the video of her and the baby to play again before he paused it. He couldn't believe it. Jo had their daughter. She must have been pregnant when he left. Jo had gone through a pregnancy, and high-risk preterm labor, and now she was taking care of a medically fragile preemie, their preemie baby girl, all alone. All because he had made the dumbass decision to move to Kansas without even talking to her. Because he had left, Jo and their daughter were alone. 
Their preemie daughter. The baby girl didn't look very big, she was definitely a preemie, and she was still on supplemental oxygen with oxygen cannula tubes in her nose. His mind filled with the possibilities of any health complications their daughter could’ve had, from brain bleeds, lung issues, hip dysplasia, or congestive heart failure, and so on.  
Why didn’t Meredith tell him? Although, they hadn’t spoken since he left. Of all the people he thought would tell him if he had a daughter, Meredith was at the top of his list. He understood why Jo didn't want to tell him, although the fact that she didn't still hurt. The fact that Meredith, his best friend in the world, didn't tell him that he had a daughter, hurt even more. A sense of karma came over him as he wondered if this was how Jo felt when she found out about the twins.
He let the video reply again and stopped it on Jo and the baby. Jo was dressed in a tie-dye T-shirt with her hair thrown up in a bun. She looked tired but happy as she showed off the baby in her arms. Alex thought she was absolutely beautiful, as beautiful as she looked the day he said goodbye to her. 
He remembered what she looked like when he turned back to look at her, one last time, after he made it through security. Her dark hair was flowing over her shoulders in beautiful waves, and she had a gorgeous smile on her face. She excitedly waved to him and blew him a kiss before the crowd surrounded him, and she disappeared from his view. The image of her smile as she blew him a kiss had replayed in his mind over and over again the past six months. 
He just stared at the photo of her for a couple of minutes as the ache in his heart consumed him. He had a heartache, a longing for her since he left, and he had carried it around every day. He missed her more than he had ever missed anyone. He missed her more than words could describe. He missed her more than anything else in this world and every day, he fought the urge to go back to her. 
Now he had a reason to go back because she had had their daughter. Their beautiful, wonderful little girl. She already looked a little bit like Alexis with her little tuffs of blond hair. Alex couldn't stop staring at them in the video. He tried to quickly do the math, he had left six months ago so, but she must have been pregnant before then, although the baby looked small, about 5 lb or so. It was June now, so Jo had to have gotten pregnant in November or October. Maybe she knew before he left, maybe she didn’t. They were so focused on arranging the witnesses for Meredith’s trial, and he was so busy working at Pac North before he left. Some days he barely saw her except for when he crawled into bed. 
That was the thing that he regretted most, that he didn't spend enough time with her, which was why, the week after Meredith’s trial, before he left, he spent as much time with Jo as he could. He visited her on her lunch breaks, he was there when she got home, he made dinner with her, and watched TV with her on the couch, and he made love to her every night. At the time, he had lied and said it was so he could spend as much time with her before he went to visit his mom, but he wanted one last perfect week with her before he broke both of their hearts. The memories of that week, of Jo’s beautiful smile, were something he thought fondly of as he slept alone in his one-bedroom apartment.
“Can I have my phone back now? I can send you the video if you want?” Marco said as his words brought Alex out of his head.
“Umm yeah,” Alex said as he handed the phone back to Marco, still in shock at the fact that he and Jo had a daughter. “Please send that to me.”
He was absolutely floored at the fact that Jo had had their baby, as Marco sent him the video. Alex quickly clicked on it and downloaded the app as his feet carried him out of the room. As he waited for the app to download, he wondered if Jo had posted any other videos. As he found a quiet spot in the halls, the app loaded, and he clicked the link and followed the icon to Jo's page. There he was greeted with a handful of videos. Some of them were of Jo dancing with Levi or by herself, but there were one or two videos of their daughter. 
One was of their daughter, which was a series of photos to the song, you're my sunshine. The photos started off when the baby was in the incubator, looking no bigger than his hand, and Alex guessed that she was about 26 weeks old. Alex looked over every photo, every video of the little girl. He was so distracted by the photos and the videos of the baby that he almost ran into a nurse. Alex quickly apologized before he came out of his daze. 
He had to go back to Seattle. He had to see Jo and their daughter. He had to be there for them. He had missed so much of her life already, including Jo’s pregnancy and her first breath, her first days of life, and he was filled with guilt and regret. Alex ran over to the lounge to get his things, cleaning out his locker while he quickly called the chief of surgery and quit on the spot. Alex hated this job anyway, he loved the kids, and he wanted to make sure that his patients, including Marco, were okay, but he needed to go home. 
Alex rushed over to the apartment he had in Kansas City. He had been staying there since the start of the pandemic. He and Izzie had agreed that since he was still working in direct contact with patients at the hospital, he would move out and get a separate apartment as they didn't want to risk transmitting this to the kids. Izzie had stayed home with the twins as with her job in oncology, she could do mostly remote consults, with only having to go on to the clinic on an as-needed basis with covid negative patients. Alex had been video chatting with them every single night and had distance visits with them at the park every Saturday and Sunday. Although, he had been considering getting his own place since before the pandemic started. He thought that he could make it work with Izzie, but the two of them were never in love. 
It only made his homesickness all that much harder, and the urge to go back to Seattle all that much larger. The one thing Alex had realized during this pandemic was that he didn't have to be in Kansas to be a good dad to his kids. He could see them part-time and visit them on the weekend, and he could do that from Seattle. Lord knows he was rich enough to fly out every weekend. He had made up his mind as he packed up his car with everything he would need to move back to Seattle. Alex got in his car, setting his GPS for the address of the loft in Seattle. As he drove past the endless crop fields, he smiled in anticipation of soon seeing their daughter and his wife, it never did feel right to call her his ex-wife.
……………………………………………………………………
Going back to Seattle was like coming home. Everything was so familiar in Seattle, whereas everything had been so foreign in Kansas, even though he had been there for months. The drive over to the Loft was just muscle memory as he allowed himself to enjoy his surroundings. The thought of seeing Jo and his daughter filled him with excitement, despite how he knew that Jo may not be happy to see him. He hoped that she would at least let him meet his daughter, and then maybe they could work out a schedule where he could see her. 
As he pulled up to the Loft, he couldn't help but sigh in relief. He was home. For the first time since he left, he was home. He had stopped back at the hospital and had tested negative before he left for Seattle as he knew with a medically fragile child, he would have to be extra careful. Still, he grabbed a mask and hoped that he would at least get to hold her. 
He ran into the apartment complex and took the stairs two at a time up to the metal gate that led to the laundry room. It was locked, as usual, so he used his key but stopped in front of the familiar red door. He paused and knocked because although it had once been his home, it wasn't anymore, and Jo earned as much privacy as she wanted. Alex heard wrestling and footsteps with muffled voices until the door slid open, but instead of Jo on the other side, he was greeted with Schmitt in a grey mask. 
“Oh boy,” Levi said, before he turned around, and Alex followed his gaze until his eyes landed on Jo holding their baby. 
For a second, he froze as he stared at her. There she was, standing before him, no longer a memory but real. She looked better than the photos and videos he had seen, even as she looked tired with her hair up in a messy bun. She was wearing his grey Iowa Hawkeyes t-shirt, which definitely had spit up on it despite the burp cloth thrown over her shoulder. 
The little girl was dressed in a blue onesie with pink flowers and green leaves, and she had a matching bow on her head. She also had the oxygen cannula tubs taped to her cheeks and had the heart and oxygen saturation monitor wires trailing down to the floor. Jo’s lips were parted as she stared at him. Alex wanted to take a step forward, to go to her, to see their baby in her arms with his own eyes, but he kept his feet planted in the entryway as he just stared at them. The girl that was possibly his daughter and his wife.
As he thought about it more and more throughout the long drive from Kansas to Seattle, he questioned whether this baby was truly his. However, the video was pretty damning evidence. Then again, Jo had always had such a soft spot for the little orphan NICU babies, and sometimes he joked about her adopting one, so maybe she finally did. Somewhere in Montana, he thought about turning around and going back or just calling Meredith and demanding an answer, but he couldn't bear the thought of going back to Kansas. He knew he belonged in Seattle, regardless of whether she had Jo or a daughter.
“Is she, is she mine?” Alex asked, finally finding his voice. 
“No,” Jo said with a shake of her head as she looked over at Levi. He went back over to her and she quickly transferred the baby into his arms. Alex was confused at first until Jo pulled up the T-shirt to reveal her rounded pregnant stomach. “But this one is.” 
……………………………………………………………………
From the moment Jo laid eyes on Alex, all she could do was stare at him. She felt relief that he was finally home. He was finally going to meet the child growing inside of her. He would be there for her and for their child. Alex was finally home. Yet, the relief and excitement faded as reality set in. She felt so betrayed because he had left without a single thought to her, nor the child growing inside her.
He seemed to stare at her as she handed Luna off to Levi. She put a hand on her belly as she felt her baby kick again. From the moment she laid eyes on Alex, the baby had done flip flops inside of her as if they could sense that their father was near. 
Alex still seemed to be in shock, but so was she. Jo didn't even know why he would assume that Luna was his. Nor why he didn't already know she was pregnant, especially after she had left so many calls, voicemails, and text that had gone unanswered. He was back, but only for their child, not for her. Yet, seeing as they were one in the same for now, Jo knew that she owed it to her child to allow their father into their life.
“We should talk,” Jo said as she finally let her shirt drop before she walked towards Alex.
 Alex just nodded as he continued to stare at her. His eyes flashed between her face and her belly, looking at her and their unborn child. He finally seemed to come back to reality and looked around the room, his eyes glancing at Levi and Luna. 
“Is this a good place to talk? I tested negative before I left, and I drove straight here from Kansas. I haven't seen anyone since I left two days ago,” Alex seemed so unsure and so worried as he looked at her. It was so strange to see it on the man she knew was always so confident even while groveling with her.
“I can take Luna for a drive, it might help her fall asleep anyway?” Levi offered, already moving around. He gathered Luna’s things to transfer her oxygen to the portable tank they kept in a backpack by the door and placed her in the car seat.
Jo knew the loft had changed so much since he had left. It looked so different yet still the same where his weights used to be there was now a twin bed set up with a dresser and a few other things as Levi had moved in. Where the dining room was, there was now a crib, a dresser with a changing station, and a rocking chair where his lounger used to be. Next to a rocket-shaped shelf, a rocketship carpet completed the space themed Nursery that Jo had set up for Luna and their baby. 
Alex seemed to watch her every move as Jo helped Levi get Luna in the car seat and send her off with a kiss and a wave. Levi gave her one last look, but Jo just gave him a nod before he closed the door behind him. She had been so thankful to have him around. Even in the midst of covid with everything else they all had going on in their lives. Between being pregnant and adopting Luna, he, Meredith, and Link had all been there for her. Jo had still felt so lonely because the one person that was supposed to be there wasn't. 
She put a hand on her stomach as she felt the baby do flip flops inside of her, so she rubbed up and down. It always seemed to calm the anxious baby inside of her. Alex took a step forward, and his hand moved as if he wanted to reach out and touch her, but then his hand quickly dropped, and he just looked down at the floor. She wanted him to feel their baby, but she could tell that he was hesitant to touch her again.
Jo went over to the couch, their couch. The one that she bought for him, that they had spent countless nights on together. She fell in love with him on this couch, she made love to him on this couch, hell she was pretty sure they made the baby on this couch. She sat down on one end and moved away the pile of Luna’s laundry and the extra pillows and blankets to create a space for both of them. She wasn’t sure she was ready to have him so close, but it was just instinct and habit and the love she would always have for him. Jo patted the spot she made for him next to her as he slowly made his way over to her.
He still seemed to be a little weary, and she could tell that he was nervous as he sat down next to her, and looked at her bump. “How far along are you?” 
Jo knew he was asking just to be sure, but she guessed that he had already done the math in his head. “24 weeks as of yesterday.” 
“Are you, are they, are you both healthy?” Alex asked as he rubbed his hands up and down his pant legs as he tried to find something to do with his restless hands.
“Yeah, we're both fine, she’s measuring big, but Carina says we've got the dates right. She looked perfect at the 20-week anatomy scan and at the ultrasound I had a few days ago,” Jo said with a nod as she continued to rub her belly up and down.
“She, it's a girl?” Alex asked, catching her words as he looked up at her with a little bit of a smile.
“Yeah,” Jo said, watching his smile as his eyes seemed to light up. “It's a girl.” 
Alex looked so happy and his eyes were bright as he laughed. It was the expression she imagined he would have when she told him she was pregnant. She was happy to see how excited he was for their daughter. He reached out again and put his hand on her belly. She remembered the way that he pulled her in for their first kiss and the shock of electricity between them. It had been pulling them together ever since. She felt that shock now and she knew Alex felt it too as he looked up and briefly caught her eye before he looked down at his hands again. His hands on her body for the first time in six months were an instant comfort. She immediately relaxed as she moved his hand to where the baby was kicking. As his hand settled, his thumb absentmindedly rubbed her belly and Jo relaxed further back into the couch. 
“Hi baby girl, it's your Daddy. I'm so excited to meet you,” Alex said, letting out a little laugh as she kicked his hand and he leaned down to kiss her belly without even a second thought.
This was how it was meant to be, the two of them, together for this pregnancy. For a moment, Jo pretended that he had never left.
“She's strong like you,” Alex said, looking up at her as the baby continued to kick his hand. “And like Alexis too. She'll climb anything and she runs all over the farm.”
At the mention of his children, Jo immediately froze up. She didn't resent them, but they were the reason why he left. They were a constant reminder that she was in this alone. Alex felt the tension in her body as his thumb stopped moving and he looked up at her. 
“Jo, I know I left, and I'm sorry…”
“No,” Jo said, instantly getting up and putting some space between them. “You don't get to do that. You don't get to try and walk it all back with I'm sorry. You left me, Alex.”
The tears instantly spring into her eyes as she began to cry, and her breath hitched as she tried to inhale. She just felt so broken, so hurt by everything that he did. Alex just looked up at her with his big puppy dog eyes. He gave her the same eyes in the front yard of Amelia and Owen's house all those years ago after he assaulted Deluca. She knows that he had grown up again since then, but after what he did, she doesn't know how things could ever go back to how they were before.
“After everything we've been through, after you promised me again and again, every day that we were together, that you would never leave and then you left!” Jo said, her voice rising as she yelled at him. “You left me pregnant, and alone, and scared. I called your mom and I knew that you weren't in Iowa. You didn't return any of my calls or my texts. You didn't even text Meredith back. I thought you were dead or that worse, that you were cheating on me, and then to find out that you were cheating, it broke me, Alex! But I couldn't let it break me because I was pregnant, and I had to keep it together for our child, and I did. You left and I, I carried on. I went to work, I went to my doctor's appointment, I built a nursery, and I got support from our friends, but not from you. I did everything without you. I am so furious at you for leaving. I am so hurt that you cheated on me. I am so broken because you left. You ignored me and you ignored our daughter. I am more hurt for them than I am for myself because they didn't ask for any of this. I get you leaving to be with your kids, but you had a kid here with me, and you ignored her. I sent you texts and photos and calls and emails, I sent you a freaking letter Alex, and you just ignored all of it!”
“What? Wait, Jo, hold up,” Alex said, standing up and shaking his head as he closed his eyes. “What phone calls, what letters, what texts, I haven't heard from you in months. The last text I got from you was a week after I left asking me if I was okay and how my mom was doing?”
Jo paused, gently wiping away her tears as she just stared at him as confused as he was. There was no way he was lying to her. He looked so genuine and Jo knew that regardless, Alex would never lie to her. She knew him almost as well as she knew herself. Alex Karev was many things, but he wasn't a liar. He dropped everything to be there for his and Izzy's kids and she knew he would never ignore his daughter with her.
“When you stopped returning my calls, I got worried.  As soon as I found out that I was pregnant, I called you, and when you didn't pick up, I sent you a photo of the pregnancy test and then later of the ultrasound photo.  I left you voicemail after voicemail, and I kept texting you, right up until I got your letter and the divorce papers, back in early February. I sent them back to you with a letter telling you that I was pregnant. When you didn't reply, I thought, I don't know.”
“Jo, I swear to you I never got any of your phone calls or your texts, or the letter, look, check my phone if you don't believe me,” Alex said, as he looked at her holding his phone out to her and she knew without having to see it, he was telling the truth. 
Regardless, Jo took the phone and opened it up. The lock screen was a picture of Alexis and Eli. She paused as she stared at them. She had never seen a photo of them before, but the second she did, she knew they were Alex’s kids. Eli was the spitting image of his father and Alexis had his eyes and his smile. They were so beautiful, and she knew that he had instantly fallen in love with them the moment he had seen them because she fell a little bit in love with them too. The two little mini Karevs staring up at her were absolutely adorable and innocent in all this.
Jo put in the password that was still the same and quickly scrolled through his text until she found her name. Sure enough, there was the text that she had sent months ago, asking about Helen, and then nothing. She clicked on the little sidebar and quickly discovered the reason why.
“You blocked me,” Jo said, crossing her arms as she handed the phone back to him.
“What? Alex asked, his eyebrow shot up in surprise as he looked at the phone. “I swear I didn't.”
“If not you, then who? Your other ex-wife or your current wife or girlfriend or whatever the hell she is to you,” Jo couldn't help the malice in her voice and the hatred she had for the woman who had torn them apart with her actions. She was so angry at them both, but especially Alex as he was her husband, and he had made the choice to cheat on her.
“Izzie, fuck,” Alex said as he turned away from her and let out a cry of frustration. “I knew it was weird when I hadn't heard from you. She said it was for the best, but I knew, I knew you wouldn't just stop texting me, but then I thought that maybe you figured it out already, and I don't know.”
He clenched his jaw and looked like he wanted to throw or kick something. Jo grabbed one of Luna’s stuffed animals from the couch and held it out to him. He looked back at her with soft eyes as they both remembered when they used to throw things at the wall together. That memory seemed like a lifetime ago. Alex grabbed the toy and threw it against the wall. It made a satisfying clunk as it hit the metal doors of the cabinet. Alex let out a heavy sigh, having gotten all his frustration out before he sat back down on the couch.
“I tried to teach that technique to Eli and Alexis, but Izzie blew up on me for it. She said it would teach them to be violent and throw things, but honestly, it's the only thing that ever calmed me down. You were the only one who understood my anger,” Alex said as he looked over at her before shaking his head and looking away. “This whole situation it's so messed up. It was all a mistake.”
Jo looked down at the situation in her belly as her baby kicked her hand again. This whole thing was a mess. She didn't want to put Alex in the same position that Izzie had, having to choose between the life that he loved and his responsibilities to his child.
“Look, Alex, we’re fine. We're both doing fine without you. When you left, I stepped up and I figured out how to do this on my own. I've done everything alone, and you know what, I'm pretty damn good at it. So good that when I fell in love with Luna, I didn't even think twice about applying to adopt her and becoming her foster mom. I'm good on my own. I can raise our daughter without you.”
“But you don't have to, Jo. I want to be there for you and for our daughter, for all of it, I want to be on the phone with you for all your appointments, and I want you to hold my hand while you're in labor and screaming at me for knocking you up. I want to be there for our daughter's first breath and when she starts walking and talking. From her first day of school to when she graduates and goes off to college and every sleepless night in between. I want to be there for you and for her,” Alex said as he pleaded with her, all but begging on his knees for her. “I am so sorry, Jo. I swear to God, I didn't know that you were pregnant. The other day this kid showed me this Tik Tok of you and Luna with a photo of me saying that I was her father. That's why I thought she was mine.”
Jo couldn't help the smile as she let out a little laugh and shook her head. “ I downloaded Tik Tok during the pandemic and kind of got hooked. I thought it would just be a funny video for our friends and I don't know. I guess a part of me did think that you would find it, or at least I hoped that you would.”
“If I had known and if I had seen your messages, I would have never....” Alex trailed off as he shook his head, looking down, still ashamed. 
“Would you have left?” Jo asked, her voice just a whisper. She knew the answer, but she needed him to say it.
“Leaving Seattle was the worst mistake I've ever made,” Alex said, looking up with her voice and his eyes full of such hurt. “I love my kids, I do, but Kansas isn't my home. Izzie and I, we. I didn’t sleep with her while we were married, I want you to know that. However, once we were divorced, I did try to start a relationship with her, but we were so different she didn't get it. She didn’t get me, not like you do.”
As Alex talked just looked up at her, his eyes full of longing as he got up and came over to her. They were so close that Jo could smell the familiar scent of his cologne and she could see the sparks of gold in his eyes. Her body involuntarily relaxed as he got closer. She longed for him too. All she wanted was to be in his arms again, to wrap her own arms around his neck, to hold him and have him hold her. However, the distance they created between them kept them apart.
“And now, with the pandemic, I barely see them.” Alex continued with a shrug. “I live in a crappy one-bedroom apartment in Kansas City and it sucks. Izzie stays home with them and I only see them through video calls. They meet me at the park on the weekends, even then we stay six apart and they miss me, but they're okay without me. I'm not okay without you and I know you're not okay without me either.”
It's a bold statement, but they both know it’s the truth. Jo felt the tears collect in her eyes again as Alex mirrored her expression, looking about two seconds away from falling apart as well. Just the acknowledgment that she needs him, that he needs her, and that they need each other, was overwhelming. 
“I never wanted to do this without you. Every time we talked about kids, I was so terrified, but I knew that I could do it if I had you by my side. When you left, I realized that I could do this regardless, but I don't want to do it alone. I don't want to do any of this without you.”
Jo dissolved into a mess of tears as they streamed down her face. Alex took a quick step forward and he wrapped his arms around her as she truly fell apart. She fell apart in Alex's arms and buried her head in his shoulder, feeling the warmth of his body and feeling his lips against her head. His arms instantly wrapped around her waist and it was everything she had wanted for the past six months. It was in that moment she realized that Alex was truly back. She cried even harder, especially as she felt his chest shake under her as his body was wracked with sobs of his own. 
Alex pulled her over to the couch and she sat on his lap as he wrapped his arms around her. They just sat together and cried. Eventually, they cried themselves out and just sat together in silence. Jo curled her fingers into his shirts and pressed her forehead against his shoulder. Alex ran his fingers through her hair like he always used to do as his other hand rested on her belly, feeling their baby move under his hand. She inhaled the sweet scent of his cologne and felt completely surrounded by him. For the first time and six months, Jo felt like she could breathe again.
Everything was how it was always supposed to be. Even if it was just for a moment, it was like a spell had been cast upon them, freezing them in time and allowing them to have just this moment together. Between being pregnant and having a newborn, Jo was exhausted, and she knew Alex hadn't slept since he left Kansas. They both fell asleep in each other's arms on their couch, truly resting for the first time in six months.
They must have slept for a few hours as by the time they woke up, the sun was low on the horizon, streaming golden beams in through the windows. For a moment, Jo pushed away the harsh memories as she woke up in Alex's arms. She pressed her nose into his neck and he seemed to forget it too as he laid a kiss on her forehead. They heard the door squeak open and finally got up. Jo could feel Levi’s eyes on them, but he didn't say anything about it. 
“So we went for a little car ride, but she took a nap. Then after she woke up, I took her to the park, and we just watched the birds and sat on the grass and hung out,” Levi said as he lifted Luna out of her car seat and Jo greeted her girl. “I had some ice cream, and Luna had her bottle. She ate about 3 oz and then proceeded to spit up all over me.” 
“Oh did you have fun with Uncle Levi at the park,” Jo cooed at Luna as she held her close and pressed a kiss to her little head before inhaling her sweet baby scent.
Levi moved to transfer Lunas oxygen tubes back to her machine. They kept Luna’s oxygen machine next to the couch on the side of her nursery as the 25 ft. oxygen tubes allow them to move around her nursery, the living room, and even into the kitchen.
“Let me help,” Alex said as he stepped forward and quietly helped Levi set up the machine. 
After they started a machine and sure that it was working, Levi escaped to the bathroom. He gave them one more look before he disappeared and turned on the fan as if to give them added privacy. 
Luna seemed content as Jo smiled down at her oldest girl. Of all the hurt she’d had in the past six months, Luna had been a wonderful bright spot. Jo couldn't help but fall in love with her, especially after Val died. Jo felt the need to step up and take care of her. Besides, she couldn't imagine sending her into the foster care system, so she had started the process of adopting her. The baby in her belly made her a mother, but Luna made her a mom. She made Jo realize that she could do this, but as she looked over at Alex, she knew she didn't have to do this alone.
Alex leaned against the couch as he watched them with curiosity. As Jo turned around to look at him, he smiled at the little girl in her arms. She walked over to him as he tentatively stepped closer before Jo transferred Luna into his arms. 
“Alex, this is Luna, my little liver baby,” Jo said, smiling down at Luna with such affection as she rubbed her thumb over Luna’s cheek. “She grew on the liver of a patient that came into the ER. I operated on her mom, Val, and Carina delivered her. When Val didn't make it, I decided to adopt her. It was kind of impulsive, but I just looked at her, and I knew that she was mine. She came home with me a few weeks ago. She loves the little star mobile that I hung above her crib, and she only falls asleep to the Twinkle Twinkle Little Star song. She hates bath time and loves snuggles, so I babywear her all the time. I talked to her, and she just stares at me, but I know that she’s listening. I love her so much and she's just, she’s perfect.”
Alex just stared at her, taking in her words with a large smile before he looked down at Luna. She waved her arms up at him, reaching out for him as he reached down to grab her finger and shook her little hand. “It's nice to meet you, Miss. Luna. I'm Alex, I'm your Sissy's dad, but I look forward to getting to know you as well.”
“Autumn, I was thinking of calling her Autumn, Attie for short, since I'm due in October,” Jo said, putting a hand on her belly and feeling her baby kick again.
“Autumn, that sounds perfect, and I guess I owe you full naming rights,” Alex said as he smiled back at her before looking down at Luna again and sticking his tongue out at her as she cooed. 
There was something about seeing Alex with her daughter that was just so perfect, and After everything that had happened today, Jo found herself falling back in love with him again. It was one of the reasons why she fell in love with him in the first place because he was so good with the kids, and he was kind to her after he found out about her past. He was gentle, and kind, and understanding throughout this whole thing. He never once blamed her or tried the force his way back into her life. He just wanted to be there for her and his daughter. He was the Alex that she had fallen in love with. Although she knew, he was still the Alex that had left her. 
Luna fussed and began to cry as Jo stepped forward to take her back. She waved her arms around and reached up and pulled out her oxygen cannulas as Jo cursed. 
“How well does she do off oxygen?” Alex said, quickly moving to put the tubes back in her nose as he looked over at her oxygenation monitor. He swayed back and forth as Luna continued to fuss and throw her arms around. 
“Okay, for about 20 minutes or so. She had a branchial cyst, so they had to resect part of her lung. Hayes thinks she’ll have to be on oxygen for a few more months or so,” Jo said as she went over to Luna’s dresser where she kept all of her medical equipment and grabbed the extra tape and things so they could redo the tape. 
Alex set her down on the bed as Jo came back over. They worked together as Alex used the wipe to remove the stickiness for the existing tape while Jo held Luna’s arms to keep her from pulling it out again. Alex put the nose part in Luna’s nostrils before he gently taped down both sides of the tubes on her cheeks, and Jo adjusted the tubes positions. It wasn’t the first time they had redone an oxygen cannula together, and they worked as a team so effortlessly. It was the same way that they used to work together at the hospital. 
As they finished, Jo picked up Luna and bounced her as she calmed down. With Luna now calm and content, Jo set her in the bassinet at the end of her bed. She just looked at him and felt a pull to him as she took a step towards him. Alex’s lips parted as she pressed up against him, as close as she could with her baby bump in between them. She reached out to put her hand on his cheek as he closed his eyes and tilted his head into her hand. She knew that he missed her touch as much as she missed him. Jo couldn’t help but wrap her arms around him as she leaned in for a kiss. They deepened the kiss as he wrapped his arm around her, and Jo moaned into his lips. Alex eagerly pressed his lips against her, and it was like coming home. Nothing about the Loft, or the hospital, or anything in Seattle had felt like home since Alex left, but his lips, they felt like home. 
They didn't break apart until they heard the squeaky door to the bathroom open again as Levi appeared. Jo turned around and pressed her fingers to her lips as if it would keep the kiss on her skin. She glanced over at Levi as he looked between them and instantly read their body language. For someone who could never figure out if a guy liked him back, Levi sure as hell read Alex and Jo like a book. 
“So I'm guessing you're back,” Levi asked, raising his eyebrows and looking between the two of them. “Does that mean you're staying here? Do I have to move out? Like I know I could move in with Taryn if I needed to, but we're in the middle of a pandemic and her roommate is really mean!”
Jo wasn't sure as she looked over at Alex, who just shrugged. “It's up to you, whatever you're comfortable with. I can get a hotel room or maybe stay with Meredith?”
“Well, I guess you can stay. Besides, I need someone to send out at 2:00 in the morning when I get a craving for burgers or when Luna runs out of diapers, but maybe you should sleep on the couch for now,” Jo said as she bit her lip as she looked over at him, but Alex just nodded. 
Alex moved around the apartments as if he had never left as he began to make dinner for them. Jo picked up Luna again and sat down in the rocking chair in her nursery space as Levi started to help Alex relearn where everything was after he had organized the fridge. An easy banter started up between the three of them and Jo put a hand on her belly as Autumn started to do flip-flops again while Luna was the opposite as her eyes fluttered close. Jo held one of her daughters in her arms as she put her hand on her belly where her other daughter was. She looked up at her ex-husband and baby daddy as he made dinner with her gay best friend and little brother. It was the weirdest family dynamics she had ever had, but she was content. 
……………………………………………………………………
Later that night, Jo stared up at the skylights. She had just gotten Luna back down after a bottle, and now she was trying to return to sleep herself. Yet, sleep evaded her and part of that was due to Autumn doing flips in her belly. She was currently swimming around like a little fish and keeping Jo up as they pressed against her organs. Jo took a deep breath, which quickly turned into a yawn before she realized she had to use the restroom. Her quick trip to the toilet only made Autumn more active. Jo sighed as she laid back down and she rubbed her belly up and down. This usually helped to calm Attie down, but tonight she must have felt particularly acrobatic as she moved around. Jo wasn't sure what she did, but suddenly, she felt a twinge of pain in her stomach as Autumn kicked her, hard. 
“Aw fuck,” Jo swore as she rubbed her hand against her lower abdomen. 
“Jo, you alright?” 
She jumped and sat up as she looked over to see Alex sitting up on the couch. “Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you. It's just the baby moving around and she kicked a little too hard. I'm not used to having to be quiet as Levi usually puts earplugs in at night, and Luna will sleep through anything.”
To her surprise, Alex just chuckled as he got up and came over to her, sitting next to her on the bed and putting his hands on her belly. “Hey, Attie, you be nice to your mom, yeah?” 
Instantly the kicks in her belly became softer as Attie quieted down. Jo raised her eyebrows in surprise as she looked up at him. Throughout her pregnancy, no one had been able to get her to calm down so quickly. 
“Wow, I can't believe that worked,” Jo said as Alex smiled, he pulled his hand away, but Attie’s kicking started up again, and she got Jo good in her kidneys as she cringed and held her side. “Or not.”
“Lay back,” Alex instructed as she complied and laid back down as he adopted that adorable grumpy look that she loved so much. He put his hands back on her belly and leaned forward to whisper to Autumn. “Hey you, I thought we agreed that you were going to be nice to your mom? It's been a long day, and she agreed to let my sorry ass stay with her. I think the least that you and I can do is let her get some rest.”
Instantly Attie calmed down to the sound of her father's voice and Alex looked up at her. He seemed so proud that he had gotten his daughter to calm down and looked up at her with a smile. 
“Thank you,” Jo whispered, letting out a breath of relief.
“No problem, besides, it's the least I can do as I’m part of the reason why she's kicking you,” Alex said, as a soft look appeared on his face and he just seemed to stare at her for a moment. 
She could tell that he was head over heels in love with her. She used to catch him with that look when she was on his service as an intern, and it was that same look he gave her when she met him at the end of the day when he worked at Pac North. It was the look he had given her all throughout their relationship and even on the day he left. After he walked through security, he turned around and gave her that look before he paused and waved at her before he disappeared into the crowd. Jo remembered that day like it was yesterday, just as she remembered the hurt of the letter that was still fresh in her heart. 
After a moment, Alex got up again, but the second his hands left her belly, Autumn started up again, and Jo scrunched up her face, and she beckoned for him to come back. He instantly came back and put his hands on her belly. Once again, Autumn calmed back down as her hard kicks and flips became light flutters in her belly.
 Jo let out a sigh as she reached out to grab his hand and gave it a squeeze. “Could you stay?”
“Are you sure?” Alex asked as he tilted his head just a little bit. 
Jo just nodded because the truth was that she wasn't sure that she should let Alex back into her bed, but he seemed to be the only thing that calmed down their daughter. He crawled in bed behind her like he had done when they were together. As he moved back to his spot in the bed and laid behind her before he wrapped his arms around her to rest on her bump. She had missed being held by him like this. They were never one for cuddling, but she liked knowing that he was right there next to her. She missed the way that he used to roll over in the middle of the night and hold her close just for a moment. 
Attie seemed to have calmed down for the night and Jo closed her eyes. Jo didn't know where they would go from there, but she trusted that he wasn’t going anywhere. She knew she shouldn't trust Alex again, but somehow she did. She always knew that he would be a good father and that it would be one of his best traits. He left her to be with his children, but a part of her knew that he wouldn't leave her child and, by extension, her. Jo would always allow Alex to love their daughter.
Alex seemed a little hesitant, but eventually, she felt him relax against her as he pressed a kissed her cheek just like he used to. Jo both loved it and hated it, as she felt a mixture of hurt and love for him right now. It wasn't something that she was unfamiliar with when she was with him. She knew there was still hurt and the need for healing, but the love was always there, and she wanted that love for her daughter. So she let him stay and fell asleep in his arms.
……………………………………………………………………
AN: This is absolutely just a one-shot, so don’t ask for a sequel.
36 notes · View notes
petals-and-bullets · 4 years
Text
Intimacy
Pairing: Izzy x Reader
Word Count: 1204
Info: Anon request! ‘Hello! I hope you’re doing well! I was wondering if you have time could you please write a fic where Izzy doesn’t want to have sex with the reader after she gives birth and the reader thinks it’s because he doesn’t like her body anymore and he thinks she’s ugly but the real reason is Izzy is scared of accidentally hurting her and he doesn’t think that she want to have sex yet and it’s a big misunderstanding but it ends with fluff please 😊💕’
A/N: Hopefully, we’re back in business and you can all expect regular posts! I’m proud of this one; I hope you like it!
The house was clean. The little one was finally down for the night – or at least for a few hours until he woke up and demanded a feeding – and Izzy was home. Sure, he was exhausted from the gig, but he was home. The pair of you had made a small home in an apartment that you were renting from your uncle in LA, and considering the pair of you had been joint at the hip since you were 10, it was unsurprising that you’d announced you were pregnant a few months into living in LA.
Unexpected. But welcomed.
Well, it was for you. The idea of it terrified Izzy; he was bouncing between bands and just narrowly avoiding getting arrested for dealing, but you were confident that he’d be a great dad. And you knew that as soon as Izzy saw little Andrew bundled up, you were right. He immediately warmed up to the concept of being a dad, and had even tried to reduce his drug usage; at least, he kept it out of the apartment.
The one thing that bothered you was that Izzy just didn’t want to be intimate with you. Sure, you’d only given birth around ten weeks ago, but you were ready to get back into the swing of your normal relationship – with the added benefit of having a little one to share your lives with. You smiled at the thought and gently placed the cup of tea down in front of him on the coffee table, before you perched carefully in his lap and brushed his hair out of his face.
“What are you after, darling?” He muttered, his arm slithering around your waist to hold you comfortably against his chest, his lips brushing along your jawline tenderly. You stifled a small laugh at the ticklish sensation, before you took his hand and gently guided it to your inner thigh.
“I’m not after anything, Iz. I just wanna have some fun. Andie’s in bed, and that means we have some peace and quiet and time to just spend with each other. And I think I know exactly how to spend it-“
“Records and cuddles.”
You blinked, your brows furrowing in confusion at how fast Izzy had answered you – and how unexpected it was. Izzy wasn’t innocent; he picked up on hints and innuendos faster than the crack of a whip, but suddenly he seemed to have not understood what you had insinuated. After a moment, you shrugged and slid out of his lap in order to place the needle down on the record on the record player, not really caring to change it.
“C’mere, doll. I wanna just have a break and relax with my favourite girl,” he murmured, before he patted his lap and smiled softly at you, and you were unable to resist the offer. Almost immediately you were curled up in his lap, his hand tangled in your hair as he leaned back against the couch, his eyes closed. He was significantly at peace, and you smiled to yourself at the sight. He’d been working almost non-stop ever since your son came into the world, determined to make it so your lives could be the best they possibly could be – and considering he’d decided to at least reduce the drug intake and ban the use of drugs in your home, you couldn’t hold him at fault. And yet, you couldn’t shake the feeling that your relationship had changed.
“Iz.”
“Mm?”
“… Am I not attractive anymore?”
He opened one eye to observe you quietly before he sat straight, furrowing his brows as he gave you his full attention.
“What?”
“Am I not attractive anymore? I mean, I’ve been trying to drop hints and god knows what else that I want to go back to how it was – sex included, and-“
“And the doc said that we should take it easy, doll. You’re the sexiest you’ve ever been - trust me – but I don’t want to run the risk of you getting hurt. You did just push a baby out of you no less than ten weeks ago.”
You blinked for a few seconds, your brain trying to comprehend just what he’d said to you. After a moment of just staring at his face, you burst out laughing and buried your face in his neck, your arms wrapped around him as you tried your hardest to calm down. After a moment, Izzy joined you in laughing, resting his head on yours before he gently patted your thigh.
“We should try and quieten down; don’t want to wake the little one,” he breathed out between laughs, and you managed to control your breathing enough to calm down. After taking a moment to clear your throat, you sat straight and nodded, wiping your eyes to rid yourself of the tears that had begun to build. Despite your efforts, however, a faint cry echoed from your son’s room and Izzy’s head fell back as he chuckled softly.
“I’ve got him,” he murmured, patting your thigh before he guided you off his lap and stood. Taking a moment to stretch, he winked at you before he walked out of the room and you listened carefully for Andrew’s whines of protest at the concept that he would have to fall asleep.
It never came.
Instead, the soft lilt of Izzy’s voice wound its way out of the room, and you smiled as you made your way down the hall and to your son’s bedroom, only to stop and lean against the doorway at the sight of your boyfriend leaning against the wall with your son cradled against his chest, his thumb rubbing his head gently. It was a tender sight, and you couldn’t help but smile – you knew that you’d chosen the right man to spend your life with, and despite his faults, he was a dedicated father and would do anything for his little one. You remained in the doorway for a few more moments before you turned and left your boys to bond, laying down on the bed with full intentions of closing your eyes for a few moments.
By the time you woke, sunlight had already streamed into the room through the parted curtains, and you scrunched your nose up in disgruntlement before you rolled over with the full intentions of waking Izzy with kisses. Although you quickly realised that his side of the bed was not only empty, but was clearly still made from the morning before. After a moment to just recollect yourself and wake up properly, you rubbed your eyes and slid off the bed and wandered out of the bedroom, only to stop when you realised that Andrew’s crib was significantly fuller than it had been the night before, and you smiled when you realised that Izzy had climbed in with Andrew. They were both still sound asleep, and you couldn’t help but quickly grab your camera to take a photo of the Isbell boys before you left them to sleep.
You may not have gotten what you were after in sense of normality in your relationship, but you knew that this new normal was far better than anything you could’ve ever imagined.
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editorialsonlife · 3 years
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Well
Welp, feeling like doing an update because there's been a lot going on to be honest. its one of those weird dichotomies where every day feels like an eternity and there's so much going on and then you look back and you're like oh, ok its just my brain making it difficult and making things take forever but anyway.
LOCKDOOOOOOOWWWWWWNNNNNNN
Lockdown life was good, apart from being thrust into it so suddenly dave left a banana on his desk. Wasn't great to come back to after 5 weeks out of the office - mummified mouldy banana!! Classic. We luckily got our first jab before lockdown started so that was good, and we were reasonably well stocked up on food and were generally a lot healthier this lockdown that last. honestly, there's a level of chill and serenity in lockdown that i just love. the ability to set my own schedule and only work the hours I actually work to get the job done? Amazing. getting 8.5 hours of sleep each night without having to wake to an alarm blaring? AMAZING. getting to go for walks every afternoon? SO FLIPPING GOOD. I love it so much, I really really do. I need this to be my life permanently.
WORK
Work is just ongoing and draining and honestly, coming back to the office was so fucking stressful and it was only one day. Being at home is just the fucking bomb. Pending home decisions, I wanna go contracting I think, but also ideally two part time contracts to have more flexibility? I dunno. You'd think a big 4 would provide variety but it really doesn't and honestly, with Richie leaving, wellington is just a sinking ship. Sean's off on parental leave, Kirstyn is down to four days a week, ben will be gone if he doesn't get promoted (and I don't think he will be tbh). Jack is just muddling along, Nigel wants to swap to consulting as well, Matt's going to be a shit leader in terms of bringing in work so it's just not going to work. and in our wider group it's going to get even more messy with heaps of the analysts leaving and a couple of senior hires too. so I think it's probably time to jump ship in general, pending the home stuff below. Also, coming back after a break again, I'm like, I don't actually like a lot of you? All the people I enjoy here are in other teams and groups, and I'll be sad to leave you all, but like, not enough to stay anyway lol.
Pending the home below, two options are to just going and get a job with a $30k payrise to make up for the maternity leave benefits I'm gunna leave behind when I leave this role - 18 weeks full pay, $100 a week for the first year back and a full year of maternity leave. It's basically 30k post tax which is a bit nuts to walk away from to be honest.
Otherwise the other option is to go contracting. Less security overall but holy shit so much money. If I went in as a project coordinator at the lowest rate to build up a bit of a portfolio I'd need to work 40 weeks of 40 hr weeks and Id basically match my current salary plus the lost family leave benefits and still qualify for govt maternity leave payments. Realistically I could go in as a project manager for $140 an hour ($60 more an hour than the above math) and absolutely smash it at that level as well so ya know, there's a bunch of other info. I like the idea of the flexibility of it and only having 6 months even if its a shitshow and beign able to walk away at the end of it. I really don't want to get a govt job and this is a v govt town which is fine but also, if I can avoid it that would be great. I just know I'm not gunna thrive in that environment.
Need to talk to Dave to get him across the line on the security issue part of that though. I've mostly come a long way in terms of my financial management (thanks YNAB) so I think he'd be ok with it mostly.
So there's a lot to toss up there because......
HOME
We got the reno plans done during lockdown, finally. which was super good. but holy fkn jesus $$$$$$ ++++++++++. The guy is coming around for the final quote on Thursday. We indicatively said $100k total because we're doing kitchen laundry bathroom and toilet. so only the most expensive rooms and when I was talking to him last week he said 'that might cover it' and they're seeing cost escalations of 7-10% a week which is just insane. we're not doing anything structural apart from putting in a cavity slider in the bathroom, and the quote they'll give us won't include flooring since they won't do it.
Meanwhile, the prefab homes I were looking at for our site were $425k fully done. Like, I'm not going to spend $130K on doing up my 1940s ex state house ya know? That's not good cost benefit ratio.
So depending on what that comes out at on thursday we'll be able to make some plans.
We also want to start trying for kids next year and need these renos done first - I am not having kids and no dishwasher lol.
Also we need bank financing so good to be in a permanent stable job for that application. the good thing is we have so much equity we know we can borrow whatever we need, I just don't want to spend that much money on it because it's fkn ridiculous. and if I'm going on maternity leave we need to be able to cover it all on dave's salary and whatever benefits I have as well so there;s a lot of financial planning and spreadsheeting going on at the moment lol. it's fab.
either way. we've got plenty of options up our sleeve. we've got friends who's brother owns a building company so we can talk to them, we've got the garage so we can get things prefabricated even if they're not installed til next year, Dave can get shit at cost through his work for whiteware, there;s plenty of things to like cost control we can do, we just need to know where we're starting from basically. thats the challenging part. but we'll figure it out, its just taking longer than I want it to basically.
We also planted up the vege garden for the spring/summer which was lovely, super jazzed about that. we've finally got the garden to a reasonably low maintenance level where everything is mostly under control and it's such a relief, honestly.
PERSONAL
Man what a shift to lockdown last year honestly. I think the last 8 weeks in particular has just been like, a massive reality check of how absolutely shit the last year was and how fucking glad I am to be rid of it. I spent a week absolutely spiralling 2 weeks ago now and honestly, I don't know how I lived in the state for more than a year. I actually don't know how I did it. and I could not be more glad that I'm finally on the other side of it, for the most part. There's still a bunch of other stuff to work through (hahahahahaha when is there not like damn) but fucking hell its nice to just not be anxious and nauseous and wound up constantly. life is actually accessible. miracle.
My workmate had his bebe - I went round and got newborn cuddles and was like, oh, is this what it is to be clucky? this is odd. so there's that as well. I think we'll probably start trying next year pending renos and jobs etc. If the renos can be done in jan I'll prob just stick it at the job to get the benefits but I dunno. it's a tough call to make really. we shall see. This all assumes we get knocked up without any issues which is questionable these days. I really want to feel healthier before getting pregnant as well, and part of that is losing weight. however, given discussing that is what triggered the spiral we're working on that one slowly.
Also, lets have a moment for counselling, because fkn bless anne and all her hard work honestly. I actually ended up emailing her being like, I;m losing my shit on the monday and then talked to her on thursday. And its so funny because it's such a counselling thing but I didn't realise until afterwards what she'd done but she was like you're clearly not doing well and then the night before dave got a fkn miserable migraine and he was up for like, 2 hrs powerchucking except he didn't make it to the bathroom in time so guess who was cleaning up vomit at 130am trying not to chuck herself but I digress. anyway, not doing well, couldn't even explain why, didn't even have words and super tired and she's like, what lynaire up to this week how's she going with izzy and chat about that and then be like how are you feeling about your body and then 5 more mins of chat about the cat and the chickens and then like bam hard question and then hows it going with x and y and z and its like, it wasn't til I was on my walk afterwards when I FINALLY started feeling marginally better I was like damn woman work your magic for figuring it out for me and helping me reregulate. all over the phone as well since we were still in lockdown. GREAT WORK FRIEND.
and then last week was like totally fucked theoretical discussion about religion and the role it's played in my life and fate vs free will and all this nutty shit but genuinely just a great discussion. She's the best and I love her. thank good for good counsellors. thank god I can afford to pay for it honestly.
Dave and I are just chugging along, god bless that man. I love him. its amazing. I miss having friends close by but understand why they had to move (boooooo f u house prices). Family is pretty chill, still not really talking to dave's parents which is nightmarish but we'll deal with that when we need to. gunna have to go and visit them at some point coz dave misses them and I feel for him, I really do. It's the whole boundaries renegotiation I went through with my family last year post wedding blow up and its just not a fun place to be. oh well. can't fix it for him but also I'm not putting up with that level of BS from either of our families once we have children. not gunna happen.
Either way, life is busy and full and fun and I'm enjoying it. Daylight savings starts this weekend too, its october next week WTF and I'm just waiting for 4pm to find out what's gunna happen to our girls trip. Clearly we cancelled our sept trip to christchurch and akaroa and hanmer springs so my covid travel curse continues. fkn ridic. Still dunno what we're gunna do with $2500 of flight credits coz if we get knocked up theres def no international trips happening any time soon.
thus concludes the almost 2000 word write up of life. hope you've enjoyed it. I'll throw up some pics in a separate post if people care about reno plans. such a good time!
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The Little Bit of Hope I Cling to -
Part 1:
Izzie goes to Grey Sloan looking for Dr. Grey, Dr. Bailey or Dr. Karev, meets Dr. Jo Karev instead
*takes place during early s15*
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“Hello Ms. Stevens, my name is Dr. Helm and I will be the resident on your case today. Now it says in your medical history that you’re a cancer survivor?” Helm asked the woman in front of her.
“Yes,” Izzie Stevens nodded her head. “I’ve been having some distressing symptoms lately. I came here to make an oncology appointment since this is where I used to get my treatment, but this morning I fainted while in the shower. I’ve been very nauseous and have not been able to keep any food down. I’ve lost a significant amount of weight. I think my mets may be back.”
“Alright, well I will call for oncology and surgical consults while I get you up for CT,” Helm nodded.
“Could I request a surgeon?” Izzie asked. “I used to work here. I’m a surgeon myself.”
“Sure,” Helm smiled. “Who would you want on your case?”
“Dr. Bailey or Dr. Grey, or Dr. Karev would be fine,” Izzie paused. “We used to be great friends.”
“Of course. Let me go find out if they’re available,” Helm said before walking off to the nurses station to find out. Minutes later Helm returned to Izzie’s bed side. “Okay, so Dr. Bailey and Dr. Grey are both in surgery right now, but Dr. Karev is available. Is that alright?”
“Yeah,” Izzie nodded nervously. She was jittery at the thought of seeing her ex-husband again. “That’s fine.”
“Great,” Helm smiled. “Dr. Karev should be down here soon. In the meantime I’m going to run a portable ultrasound to see if there are any masses in your abdomen.”
Izzie took a deep breath. She hadn’t expected to see him so soon. She knew coming back to Seattle for treatment would bring back all kinds of complicated memories. She didn’t come to start any trouble, though. She didn’t come to try to get him back. Sure, a part of her hoped that maybe he’d want her back and she’d have a chance to fix what she so horribly destroyed before. It really wasn’t why she was here, honestly. Her cancer was back. She was sure of it. She didn’t need to look at the scans to figure it out. She just wanted to be surrounded by friends as she fought it again.
***
“Hey!”
“Hey,” Jo smiled as Alex came up behind her and placed a kiss on her cheek. “I’ve missed you today.”
“I’ve missed you too,” Alex bent down to give her another kiss. “Anything exciting so far?”
“Not really,” Jo shook her head. “I did a bowl resection, supervised a resident perform an appy, and just checked on my post-ops. I think I’ll just go to the lab and work on my research if nothing comes up.”
“You could always join me,” Alex offered. “I have a kidney transplant in about an hour if you want to scrub in. I’m actually getting to do surgery today and the only thing that could make it better is if you were there with me.”
“Sounds tempting,” Jo leaned forward and brushed her lips against her husband’s. “We haven’t scrubbed in together for a while now.”
“I know,” Alex nodded. “And maybe after we can go to my office and... do some other stuff, too.”
Jo laughed, “You just want to get in my pants.”
“Always,” Alex wiggled his eyebrows and grinned. “I’m really just trying to knock you up before the year is over.”
“If I would’ve known you’d be this eager to have sex with me when I suggested trying to a baby I would’ve said yes years ago,” Jo giggled. She wouldn’t admit it to his face, but she found his desire for her incredibly sexy. If anything, it made her want him even more. “You know, that reminds me actually that I’m supposed to be getting my period this week. So, let’s cross our fingers and hope for the best.”
“Hey,” Alex smiled and his face softened. “We just started trying. It usually takes a while. So, whether you’re pregnant or not, it’s okay. We’ll just keep having fun trying until it happens.”
“Yeah. I know,” she sighed and reached up to wrap her arms around his neck. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
“Sorry chief, but I need to speak with Dr. Karev,” Helm walked up interrupting their moment. Jo and Alex separated and nodded for Helm to continue. Helm looked at Jo. “Dr. Karev, there is a patient in the ER requesting you. She’s said that you worked on her along Dr. Bailey and Dr. Grey. They’re both in surgery, so I told her that I’d come find you.”
“Oh, okay. I’ll be right there,” Jo turned back to Alex. “I guess I won’t be scrubbing in with you after all.”
“Some other time,” Alex gave her one last peck on the lips and walked down the hall. “See you later!”
Jo looked at Helm, “Alright, let’s go.”
They walked down to the Pit. Helm briefed her on the patient’s condition and Jo tried to rack her brain for anything that may remind her of the patient, “What did you say that patient’s name was again?”
“Um... it started with an ‘S.’ I’m sorry, I don’t remember. It was something common, though,” Helm apologized. “Oh! And I detected an abnormal mass in her abdomen using the ultrasound machine, so I think her mets are back.”
“That’s fine. You can go ahead and check on other patients while I do the consult,” Jo instructed.
Jo walked up to ER bed 3 and pulled the curtain open, tablet in her hand. She smiled at the blonde woman and extended her hand, “Hi. I’m Dr. Karev. I heard you requested me. I’m so sorry, I but I don’t seem to remember your case. Could you remind me your name?”
Izzie was confused. Who was this woman that walked into her room saying that she was Dr. Karev? Izzie furrowed her brows, “I’m sorry, you’re Dr. Karev? The Dr. Karev I was expecting is male.”
A look of realization dawned on Jo’s face, “You must be looking for my husband.”
“You husband?” Izzie asked. “You’re married to Alex Karev?”
“Yes,” Jo grinned widely. “We recently got married. Everyone keeps mixing us up since I decided to change my last name. I’ve to tell the residents to start being more specific when they’re paging us. What did you say your name was?”
“Izzie Stevens.”
Jo raise her eyebrows in surprise, “Huh... so I guess you really weren’t expecting me.”
“Nope,” Izzie shook her head. “So, I’m guessing you know who I am?”
“I do,” Jo nodded. Jo would be lying if she said she’d never thought about what it would be like to meet the woman who broke Alex’s heart. She’d also be lying if she said that the thought of this woman didn’t intimidate her. Jo had heard all about their tragic love story and a small part of her questioned where Alex’s loyalties lied. Ultimately though, it didn’t matter who this woman was. She was a patient and deserved the best care. Jo had done this before. She’d taken care of Alex’s dad. She could take care of his ex-wife, too. “So, you think your cancer is back?”
“Yeah,” Izzie’s voice cracked. “I was doing great for many years. No symptoms, no relapses, nothing. I was cancer free. I thought I beat it.”
“When did you realize something was wrong?”
“I’ve been here in Washington for the past year taking care of my mom. She was in a car accident that should’ve killed her and has been going through really intensive rehab. A few weeks ago I started feeling sick while on my way to pick her up from physical therapy,” Izzie sighed. “Look, I’m not here to cause any problems or issues or bring back the past. I’m here because I need help if I’m going to fight this, and I can’t let my mom fight for me. She’s got enough to worry about. It would just be nice to see a familiar face again.”
Jo considered herself an empathetic person, which is why it was so difficult to hate this woman. If anything, Jo felt bad for her. Deciding to be the bigger person, Jo called Helm back to bed 3, “I need you to get Dr. Stevens up to CT and admit her. Do you know if Dr. Bailey and Dr. Grey are available yet?”
“They’re still in surgery,” Helm replied.
“How about the chief? Or Webber?”
“Let me check,” Helm pulled the OR schedule up on the tablet. “Dr. Webber is off for the day and Chief Karev is about to go in on his kidney transplant kid.”
“Thanks Helm,” Jo turned back to look at Izzie. “I’m going to go talk to Alex while Dr. Helm takes care of you. I’ll be back soon.”
Jo left the ER and made her way to the OR floor to find her husband. Seeing his name on the board for OR 4, she hurried over to the scrub room. Walking in, she saw him through the window speaking to his patient. Jo waved to get his attention.
Alex scrunched his face and walked over to the scrub room, “Hey. What are you doing here? Didn’t you have a consult?”
“I did,” Jo took a deep breath. “I’m going to tell you something, but I don’t want you to freak out. Just know that I’ve got this and I’m taking care of it. If at any point you feel uncomfortable with me taking in this patient you let me know and I’ll hand it over to Bailey.”
“Who is it?”
“It’s Izzie Stevens,” Jo bit her lip. “I have Helm taking her up for CT now, but I’m pretty sure her cancer is back.”
“Izzie is here?” Alex asked, shocked expression on his face.
“Yeah,” Jo let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding as her eyes watered. “Look, I know you two have lots of unresolved history and when you married me, you didn’t think you’d ever see her again, so I’d understand if—“
“What?” Alex couldn’t believe what he’d heard come out of Jo’s mouth. “Stop talking. I’m not going anywhere. I didn’t marry you because I couldn’t have Izzie. I married you because I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. So shut up with this ‘unresolved history’ crap and trust that I’m right here Jo.”
“Okay,” Jo gave him the tiniest nod and a small smile. “I’m sorry. You know how it is... a lifetime’s worth of abandonment issues will really do a number on you.”
“I’m not abandoning you, Jo. Someone would have to kidnap or kill me before I ever willingly leave you,” he cracked a smile.
“I know.”
Alex looked at Jo for minute before speaking again, “Hey, how about I come with you. I can get the peds fellow to do the transplant. We’ll go in and treat her until Bailey gets out of the whipple she’s doing and then we can transfer Izzie’s case to her.”
“Alright.”
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I saw you re-blog criminal minds, can you do a Jolex inspired fic about 14x15????? I'd love to see the two mashed up
Somebody to Die For
In this AU, there were six interns, and Jo and Alex were best friends from the start like Mer and Cristina or Izzie and George, additionally, Paul was an attending at the hospital that Jo met and married in season 3, everything happens the same, he was abusive and she manages to divorce him around season 5. This is set in the season 6 finale during the shooting. Derek was shot in his office and Gary Clark finds April, Alex and Jo on the walkway and decides to play one last game.
Alex could feel the sweat dripping down his back, his heart thumping as he tried to quiet his breathing crouching down on the floor, the only thing keeping him together was the feel of her hand in his. He has to keep her safe. He hasn’t looked back at her yet, but he can hear her unsteady breaths from where she hid behind him.
“What's it gonna be?” The gunman yelled, waving the gun coward towards April. He could feel Jo jump beside him, a slight whimper leaving her lips and she squeezed his hand tighter. This morning they’d been rowing about some stupid bet, they’d totally ignored the lockdown notification, thinking it was just some stupid drill and now they were trapped along the walkway, praying for some sort of miracle. He wanted to reach out, wrap his arms around her and tell her everything was going to be okay but they’re under strict orders to not move if they wanna make it out alive.
“Please. I don't want to do this.” April cries, her whole body shaking as she stands before the gunman, her tears flowing fast.
“Focus, April...Truth or Dare?”. He grins, holding the gun out, pressing his finger on and off the trigger like some sort of sick sadistic game. A grin appearing on his face as April screams, her eyes squeezing shut as she waits for a shot that never comes.
“Please.” She whimpers, holding her hands out as if they offered any protection.
The guy laughs, throwing his head back, mimicking April’s cowering form. “Doc, you got to decide. That's what you do, right? Decide life or death with a flick of your wrist.”
Suddenly Alex feels Jo’s hand loosen in his, and like a shot she passes him, her form a blur, grabbing the attention of the gunman. Alex tries to call out for her but his throat is dry. It's too late.
“Um, if April won't play, I will.” Jo trembles holding her hands up as the gunman spins around to face her, his fingering hovering over the trigger.  “Truth or dare. That's your game, right?” She whispers, her eyes flicking to April who had crumbled into a heap on the floor, sobs wracking her body as she went. “I'll play.”
The gunman seems to consider her offer, pacing around looking between Jo and April sizing up his best chance at the game while Alex remains frozen on the floor, his feet glued down as he watches Jo, knowing at any second everything that matters to him could be gone.
“Ok. Doctor…”
“Wilson.” Jo gulps, her hands still raised as she hesitantly steps closer to him.
He raises his eyebrows at Jo, a sickly smiley appearing on his face. “Doctor Wilson. Truth or dare?”
“Truth,” Jo answers instantly.
Slowly the gunman makes his way to where Jo is standing, circling her slowly. Jo can feel the heat of his breath against her neck as he talks.  “If I think you're lying or stretching the truth in the slightest, I'll kill him.” He mutters raising his gun towards Alex, making Jo flinch as she glances over at him, her heart speeding up as her eyes meet Alex's.
Biting her lip, she slowly nods, trying to express how sorry she is to Alex with just a glance.
“Have you ever had a patient die before?”
“Yes, I have.” Jo grimaces, the colour drawing from her face as he circles her again.
“Was it your fault?” He mutters, coming around to stand before Jo, pocking her breast bone with the barrel of the gun, making Jo shiver.
“No.”
“Liar!” A gunshot rings out across the walkway, making April scream, Alex is up instantly heading towards Jo when the gunman turns his attention on him, another warning shot ringing out, stopping Alex in his tracks.
“No, no, no. I'm not lying. Ok, I'm not lying.” Jo screams, whipping around so she's standing directly in front of Alex holding up her hands, trying to control her rapid breathing as she stumbles over her answer. “The patients I’ve lost, I’ve made mistakes but I’ve always tried my hardest to give them the best care that’s the truth.”
Biting down on her lip, she can feel the blood beginning to seep through, as she stops herself from crying out. “Ok, you asked, and I told the truth, ok. I told you the truth. So now it's my turn. Right? That's how this game's played. We take turns. Truth or dare?”
The gunman pinches the bridge of his nose, muttering something under his breath as he paces back and forth. “Truth.”
“What's it gonna take for all of us to walk out of here alive, for this to end peacefully?”
“Someone to pay for my wife.” He yells, throwing his arms out, the gun smacking Jo straight in the head. She winces, squeezing her eyes shut, smelling the alcohol on his breath as he continues. “My turn. Truth or dare?”
Jo swallows, the hot tears rolling down her face, as she feels the gun press into her skin, the loud beating of her heart drowning out April’s cries and the faint sound of sirens outside. “Truth,” she whispers, letting out a sigh of relief as he lowers the gun to his side, taking a step back.
“I want you to say something you're afraid to say, something that you'd never tell anybody.” He spits, his eyes narrowing on Jo, cocking his head to the side as he analyses her, looking her body up and down in a way that makes vomit rise in Jo’s throat. “And you better make it good, 'cause if it's not, it's gonna be the last thing you ever say.”
Nodding Jo tries to focus as her vision blurs with tears while she tries to wrack her brain for something, anything that will get them out of this.
“So what's it gonna be?”
“There are only three people I trust in this world...”
“Boring.” He snaps, a gunshot flying by Jo’s ear, making Jo bite down hard on her lip again to stop herself from screaming, desperately trying to calm her breathing enough to talk, “Next!”
Jo whimpers, feeling completely hopeless as more tears burn her cheeks “When I was married before I was pregnant and I..”
“Boring.”
"No..No" Jo winces, bracing herself for another shot when she feels a warm hand against her back.
“Jo.” His voice sends tingles down her spine, offering her the tiniest moment of safety and hope.
Alex, her stupid fool of a best friend is now standing next to her.
“Shut up!” The gunman screams, coming forward he grabs Jo by her hair, ignoring the way she screams out in pain, as she claws at his hands, leaving Alex standing there powerless as he points the gun towards him. “Ok, ok, ok. Last chance. Something you would never say aloud, not even to your boy here. Your deepest, darkest secret. Impress me or I kill him. Come on!” He yells as Jo's knees buckle underneath her, falling to the floor, another shot of pain rippling through her as he holds her head up.
“Alex, um... Um... I've always loved you.” She whispers, looking up from her place on the floor, her eyes finding his, he's crying, his eyes red from the salty tears, his fists clenched tightly as he stares back at her. “And I was just too scared to say it before. And now things are just really too complicated to say it now. I'm sorry. But you should know.”
Jo can’t bear to look away as she shares her secret, watching the shock register in Alex’s eyes. She’d imagined this moment so many times, she should’ve told him intern year but she was too scared and then he’d been so mad at her for dating Paul and it had taken so long to rebuild their friendship that by the time they had got to place where she could tell him, he was marrying someone else, he was marrying Izzie, what could she do? She wasn't about to storm his wedding...not after she’d sat in the back of the church and listened to his vows.
“Hot damn.” The gunman chuckles, releasing Jo’s hair, bending down in front of her. “That's what I'm talking about. Now those are some last words right there. But not good enough to save your life.” He grins, lifting the gun up to her forehead.
It happens in a flash, a loud gunshot ringing across the walkway, Aprils screams echoing around as blood splattered across the floor…
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