#goodbye boogers | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

offbrandkyoya · 1 year

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Lights, Camera, Action! - scaramouche x reader smau

summary:

you’re best friends with the famous band of all time, 5WIRL. however, DCKZ are rising to the top which are leaving your friends in the dust. the solution: add a new member, a new face to start some attention! it did cause attention alright, especially for your heart.

pairing: scaramouche x gn!reader

genre: band au, smau, fluff, crack, celebrity x reader, angst

warning: cursing, scandals, false rumors, kys jokes, mistreatment

status: completed!

taglist: closed :(

5WIRL the lovers DCKZ

Prologue: 1 & 2

01: congratulations! (you’re fucked)

02: common venti L

03: todays the day

04: childe has 0 rizz

05: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, SIX

06: let’s do it

07: << egg sandwiches

08: not your wife

09: fake birthday

10: scarapoo

11: sandwich kisses

12: stay mad

13: kaeyas delusional era

14: yn’s love life

15: SCARA!

16: therapist venti

17: the first show

18: bitchy woman

19: cricket cricket

20: just a friend

21: oh

22: strong

23: retweet

24: im glad to have met you

25: the delusions won

26: HE WANT ME

27: yes

28: TEN?????

29: giggling

30: hoe list

31: date night

32: together 4eva

33: bf reveal

34: enough is enough

35: best friends

36: sugar booger

37: marriage arc

38: fucking kids

39: by my side

40: kazurizz

41: oops i did it again

42: suck it up

43: stupid + stupid

44: = scarayn

45: angel from heaven

46: jealousy jealousy

47: boy what

48: fine then

49: feelings suck

50: hopefully

51: I’m Sorry

52: two weeks!?

53: he’s everywhere

54: bitchless era

55: good luck (you need it)

56: the artist named “….”

57: bye boyfie

58: love confessions

59: yn the widow

60: scara the widower

61: NOW NOW NOW

62: TAY

63: PAC-MAN

64: horrible people

65: pussy

66: big fan

67: what about us?

68: ten kids confirmed

69: crashing down

70: sleeping beauty

71: Goodbye Moon

72: new you new me

73: rattled cages

74: Better luck next time

75: Here Goes

76: Therefore, you and me

77: communication is key

78: the art of love

79: last show

80: thoma ache

81: masked singer

82: think about it

83: haters gonna hate

84: mamas boy

85: you hafta

86: it’s over

87: 2 brothers 2 men

88: Yns Mona Lisa

89: star

90: horn dog

91: win or lose

92: fight club

93: warmth

94: This is Life

95: Epilogue

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the-froschamethyst4 · 5 months

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Do I think the COD men are good Father?

COD Men Headcanons

✲✲✲✲✲✲

König

König is a girl dad

He loves his girls

But I think he would be a good father

He'd talk more in German than English

König would want his child to learn German more than English because he feels like German will be more useful in the Primary Schools than English, but his child can speak English if they wish

When you were pregnant with with your baby, he went to all the parenting classes with you

König changes the diapers, picks the boogies, takes the spit up from the baby and will wake up in the middle of the night for the baby just so his little wife could get some rest

He does bring his kid to the base every once and a while to show off his kid

✲✲✲✲✲✲

Ghost

✨Girl Dad✨ and you know it

OF COURSE HE’S A GOOD FATHER!!!

He doesn’t want his child to grow up like he did, he’s going to be better than his own father

Simon isn’t Ghost when he’s home, he doesn’t bring that alter-ego into or anywhere in the house

Simon learns to control himself when it comes to cussing

He lets one slip out but he got smacked for it

Watches children shows with his baby. He doesn’t dare to touch the remote to change the channel, the baby could sense when he was going to change the channel

He went to the parenting classes

He takes over doing the diapers, spit-up and waking up in the middle of the night…boogers freak him out

✲✲✲✲✲✲

Price

Who we kidding OF COURSE HE’S A GOOD FATHER!!

He doesn’t care what gender the baby comes out to be he was going to love them no matter what

Has joked he wants around 8-10 kids but of course you won’t let him and your body will probably give out at 2 anyways

Goes to the parenting classes

Does diapers, makes bottles, washes the baby and wakes up in the middle of the night

Price will sometimes not even make it to work on time because he wants to make sure his baby and wife are safe before he leaves

Likes to watch kid cartoons with his child

✲✲✲✲✲✲

Soap

Not gonna lie…he’d be a good father but…you sometimes need to watch your husband more than your baby

He absolutely SCARES the shit out of you, your husband will pick the baby up and launch them into the air but catches them. The laughs are funny but you are scared he’ll miss and they land on the floor

He barely went to the parenting classes (went for 4 weeks and thinks he knows everything)

Does make bottles, diapers, every once and a while wakes up in the middle of the night, no booger picking

He does stop working out a lot and has collectively started to get the dad bod which you do love

He gives his dog tags to his wife just in case something happens he has an extra pair

Goodbye kisses to both of his babies when he leaves for work

✲✲✲✲✲✲

Alejandro

Alejandro good father

Boy and girl dad, doesn't care on gender

Alejandro has this thing on dressing his baby in cute animal onesies, his mom did it to him and his siblings, might as well keep it going with his kid(s)

He works from home a lot now

Watching kid cartoons got on his nerves in the beginning but now he's more into them then the baby

When the baby was born Alejandro jokingly did some 'ice breakers' with his kid, he thought it was funny but you as his wife not so much

He went to the parenting classes

He wakes up in the middle of the night, makes bottles, diaper changes, even makes dinner, and the house shopping

✲✲✲✲✲✲

Gaz

Good father

Does call in to see how his family is doing while he's away

Went to the parenting classes

Does diapers, makes bottles, take turns waking up in the middle of the night and takes the spit-up

No cussing in the household

He got bored of watching the cartoons, but he listens more than watches them

Does the cooking to let you rest

Basically starts picking up your chores so you could rest, like laundry, washing dishes and cooking, he still does his own chores, like cleaning/dusting

Dresses the baby, sometimes will even purposely do matching outfits from time-to-time

#cod modern warfare #cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod x reader #fandom #fanfic #call of duty #mw2 #cod

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yeahxsurexokay13 · 2 months

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fraternising with the enemy - jude bellingham

part 1 - @ maia.graceee

summary: maia's instagram profile

2020

maia.graceee

Liked by user298 and 1.704.901 others

maia.graceee came into this show being a little booger and i'm coming out of it still a booger, only (slightly) taller. saying goodbye is rough, but so beyond grateful for all the love and memories. thank you to all the @/thefosterstv family for these past years, i will miss you lot and stage 22 massively!!!<333

view all 1.960 comments

fan1 The best show I have ever watched

fan2 lloro 🤧🤧😭😭 [i'm crying]

cierraramirez ily sissy 🤍🤍💋

maia.graceee i love u forever❤️❤️❤️❤️

user1 man Jude used to be shorter than Callie. Now it’s the other way around ☹️❤️

fan3 This show is MY LIFE you guyysssss 😭😭😭😭

fan4 voy a echar mucho de menos a callie :( [i'm going to miss callie so much]

maia.graceee

Liked by alexiaputellas and 1.208.198 others

maia.graceee celebrated i'm finally legal in europe surrounded by my family and friends (some of whom flew all the way from la to barcelona only to be with me !!!!!!!!!). i feel soooooo incredibly lucky xx

view all 2.983 comments

maia.graceee also thank u for all the birthday wishes <333 love u guys

fan1 HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY GORGEOUS

siramartinezc ♥️

maia.graceee ♥️

user1 when was her birthday?

fan2 2 days ago! on the 18th of august :)

fan3 feliz cumple 💖 [happy bday]

fcbarcelona per molts anys, Maia! 🎂 [happy bday, Maia!] liked by maia.graceee

fan4 sb check on @/maia.graceee

fan5 she's a verified culer now omg

lucasjames.t el meu aniversari és el mes que ve [my birthday is next month]

maia.graceee @/lucasjames.t envidioso [jealous much?]

user2 GUAPAAAA [beautiful]

2021

maia.graceee

Liked by danieljames.g and 2.009.102 others

maia.graceee our (late) christmas present to you is almost here!!! less than 24h for the season premiere of 'good trouble'. eeeeek.

view all 2.003 comments

user1 Is it a movie or a series???

fan1 Y CUÁNDO VA A SALIR EN ESPAÑA ?????!!!! [and when will it be out in spain ?????!!!!]

fan2 que fantasíaaaaaaaaaa [what a fantasy] liked by maia.graceee

user2 @/user3 did you know about this?!

user3 yea!!

fan3 Omg omg more from you two yes

fan4 AHHHHHHH😍😍😍

maia.graceee AHHHHHHHs right!!!!!!!!!

fan4 OMG YOU ANSWERED HI I LOVE U

user4 Can’t wait 🍾🍾🍾🍾

maia.graceee

Liked by pablogavi and 1.808.279 others

maia.graceee el clàssic es queda a casa!!! visca barça ❤️💙 [the clasico stays at home!!! long live barça]

view all 3.083 comments

user1 cómo que es culé? 😐 [wdym she's a barça fan?]

fan4 y muyyyyyyy culé jaja [and a very big one at that haha]

fan1 VAMOOOOS 😍😍😍 [let's go]

fan2 how many languages does this woMAN SPEAK?¿

user2 Come back to the U.S :(

pedri ❤️💙

fan3 OMG NOT THE BARÇA YOUNGSTERS LIKING AND COMMENTING I -

ansufati What a picture! 👏

maia.graceee very good english, my friend😂😂

#actress!reader #actress!au #instagram au #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham smau #football smau

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lostinbooks14 · 8 months

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Times in the Wilderness

Noodles Acts Cool

Leo waited for Piper to come meet him at the door of the Math classroom. Dylan had stayed behind to wait with him in the empty hallway, which was not comforting at all. An aura of death and blood still count to him, which didn't make sense. If anything, it should be clinging to him. He doubted Dylan, no matter how muscly he was, had the guts to actually kill someone- but then again, neither did he.

"That was quite the performance back there huh, noodles?"

He looked at him in confusion, wondering if he was talking to him. Noodles?

"I've never heard you talking, you know. Are you actually mute though?"

He shook his head, which was probably not solid proof, but thankfully Piper came.

"Hey, Dylan...Nice of you to wait but we're all good now," she waved goodbye and hurriedly walked away, Leo at her heels.

"No offense to Dylan, but I'm not really a huge fan. He feels...off, somehow. You feel it too?"

So he wasn't the only one. He nodded.

"I don't mind when we're in crowded places, but a deserted hallway, eh...not so much."

The afternoon went by quickly. Piper took him around the school, talking about clubs and societies and sports he might want to try out (he definetely would not). She also gave a running commentary on all the teachers and most of the students they saw, so that by the end of the day, he was exhausted and knew too much about guys who ate their own boogers.

Leo had mumbled said a goodbye at his dorm room door, not wanting Piper to see what would most likely be a horrible first meeting.

He pushed open the door to see his four roommates. He knew, ultimately, that he had to get along with them. The others were older than him, and only stayed with him when he was with Piper- these kids though, stayed with him when he slept. He had to make sure he was safe.

He held up a hand and grinned. He could be pretty convincing when need be. "Hey, folks! I'm Leo the newbie, now your other roommate. Pleased to meet you."

A black guy as wide as Leo but about a foot taller spoke up, "you our age? Didn't see you in class."

He gave a carefree laugh, "hah, yeah. I got put in a Year 10 class for some reason, though. Apparently I'm 'advanced'," he chortled. "Dumb shit. I can't even read one sentence with my dyslexia doing my brain in. I swear once I read 'underwater' as 'underwear' in front of the dang principal. No regrets though, he was a major arsehole."

The guy's lips quirked at that. A short, fat guy gave a snort. And the other two were smiling. Game won.

"I'm Julius. You seem like a fun guy, Leo. I get the feeling we'll get along. I'm here cause I bit off my old man's fingers by the way."

"I'm Simon. Drug addict or whatever." That was the short fat guy with the pale skin that seemed to peel off his body. He'd been like that for a while too, he recalled. Maybe not that bad though.

"Minho." A buff East-Asian guy. "Stole a bunch of dogs. Them people thought I was gonna eat them."

"Were you?"

He scoffed.

"Nah, I set all 44 loose in the nearby Target for fun. Them huskies went all out on em pork chops."

"Mike," the blond dude grinned. "Here for anger management issues. At least that's what my dad said when I broke his new car with a hammer."

Violent. Ok. Definetely NOT safe.

"What are you here for?"

Oh shit... but then again, he doubted anyone would believe this bunch of psychos if they evrr decided to tell anyone, so he decided to tell the truth. Some of it, at least.

"Drug addict. Ran away from a bunch of foster homes and an orphanage. Permenantly injured the last dude who decided it was a good idea to let me in their home." He decided not to mention that it was self-defense, since the psycho had tried to tie him back down on that horrible, gruesome, stinking bed he'd been trapped on for three fricking months.

Or that he had murdered people.

Leo found that whenever he put on this act, his mind would put it on too. Everything that had kept him screaming and crying in his bed last night suddenly seemed much more comical and light-hearted. But there was only so much time you could block a volcano.

So Leo had decided to let the lava leave at an average constant rate, instead of suddenly letting it all explode and burn everything to the ground .

With his terrifying fire powers, that was an actual possibility.

"Sick, dude." Liam gave him a finger gun.

He gave back two before plopping down on his bed as the bell rang.

"Lights out in ten?"

"Thirty. Now's bathroom time. The matron comes around to check on us afterwards. After that it's back to gossiping."

"Matron?"

"She'll introduce herself in the morning. Explain where your dirty undies go and all that."

"OK? Well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm feeling pretty tired after driving halfway through the country, so I'm gonna crash."

Minho gave a thumbs up. "I'm feeling kinda tired too. Friday and all. I'll crash too."

"Same," Julius agreed. Simon seemed put out but didn't argue.

...

Leo took off the towel he always used to cover mirrors after slipping in to his clothes. It was something he'd picked up at his first orphanage. He didn't need to see his skinny, bruised, and carved body twice a day. He didn't need to see it at all, actually. So the towel worked great.

He was the last to use the bathroom, so the lights went out as soon as he got into bed. The Matron had come around before he went in, a strict, short woman who clearly hated her job, and snapped at them a bit. Then she snapped at him a bit more and promptly dissapeared.

Leo liked the bed, it was comfy but not too comfy. He'd never had a bed at this specific level of comfort before, except when he slept with his mom, so he sank in, feeling his eyes droop. He vaguely recalled that he was going to stay up just in case he had a nightmare (or someome decided to murder him) before he was pulled headfirst into one.

@im-always-lost-in-a-book glad to see you're enjoying it❤. And English isn't my first language so please excuse any weird grammar mistakes😅.

#heroes of olympus #leo valdez #leo hoo #piper mclean #leo valdez angst #times in the wilderness #leo valdez fanfic #hoo fanfic #heroes of olypmus fanfic #original character #next one is the nightmare and i want to go all out #i should probably remember to put tws

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kimberly40 · 10 months

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Southernisms:

Dumb as a bag full of hammers.

Meaner than a skillet full of rattlesnakes.

I won't say it's far, but I had to grease the wagon twice before I hit the main road.

If a trip around the world cost a dollar, I couldn't get to the state line.

He looks like he was inside the outhouse when lightening struck.

She looks like she was born down wind from the outhouse.

Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.

Scared as a sinner in a cyclone.

Scared as a cat at the dog pound.

She's so ugly she'd make a freight train take a dirt road.

He's so ugly his cooties have to close their eyes.

So ugly his mama takes him everywhere she goes so she doesn't have to kiss him goodbye.

She looks like she fell face-down in the sticker patch and cows ran over her.

He looks like the dogs have been keepin' him under the porch.

He's about as sharp as a mashed potato.

So dusty the rabbits are digging holes six feet in the air.

It'll last about as long as a fart in a whirlwind.

He's rough as a corn cob.

He's got enough money to burn a wet mule.

He's about as sharp as a bag full of wet mice.

It's as dry as the dust in a mummy's pocket.

It's about as scarce as bird crap in a cuckoo clock.

He's as tight as the pages in a book.

This race is as tight as the rusted lug nuts on a '55 Ford.

It’s hot enough to peel house paint.

Running like a squirrel in a cage.

Safe as a tick on a dog with a stiff neck.

He couldn't pour rain out of a boot with a hole in the toe and directions on the heel.

If dumb was dirt, he'd cover about half an acre.

So windy we're using a log chain instead of a wind sock.

Tighter than bark on a tree.

As welcome as an outhouse breeze.

Her hair looks like a cats been suckin' on it.

We were so poor my brother and me had to ride double on our stick horse.

As bad-off as a rubber-nosed woodpecker in a petrified forest.

As confused as a cow on astroturf.

It was so hot you could pull a baked potato right out of the ground.

It's so dry the trees are whistling for the dogs.

Busier than a cat covering crap on a marble floor.

If things get any better around here, I may have to hire someone to help me enjoy it.

Well knock me down and steal muh teeth!

Cute as a box full of puppies.

You can't get rid of 'em. He's like a booger you can't thump off.

It's about as hard as trying to steer a herd of cats.

The wheels still turning, but the hamster's dead.

He's so confused he doesn't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his ass.

She was as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

So crooked you can't tell from his tracks if he's coming or going.

I wouldn't trust him any farther than I can throw him.

He's got more guts than you could hang on a fence.

So dry the catfish are carrying canteens.

So dry I'm spitting cotton.

So hot the hens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

Cold as a frosted frog.

Cold as an ex-wife's heart.

Cold as a cast iron commode.

Cold as a banker's heart.

She's about as useful as buttons on a dishrag.

He's tougher than a two-dollar steak.

Happy as a puppy with two tails.

She’s got enough wrinkles to hold an eight-day rain.

That’s about as useful as a trap door on a canoe!

He’s busier than a one-legged man at a butt-kickin contest!

He’s so dumb he couldn’t piss his name in the snow.

That politician’s so crooked he could hide behind a cork screw!

That baby was so ugly the Doctor spanked the Momma!

She’s so ugly she’s got ten-foot pole marks all over her.

It’s rainin’ so hard it sounds like a cow pissing on a flat rock.

He’s so bad off, his eyes looked like two piss-holes in a snowbank.

Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit!

Her hair looks like it caught on fire and somebody put it out with a brick.

He couldn’t find his rear with his hands in his back pockets.

It’s raining so hard the animals are starting to pair up.

His pants were so tight that if he farted, he’d blow his boots off.

Raising kids is like being pecked to death by a chicken.

He’s so skinny, his pants had only one back pocket.

He was mean enough to hunt bears with a hickory switch.

He was ugly as a burnt boot.

Tougher than the back end of a shootin' gallery.

...Thank You, Dear Lord, for blessing me with being a Southerner.

•Photo taken near Spruce Pine, North Carolina

#southern style #southern life #southern living #southern

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babbling-idiot2 · 1 month

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hii ,um i had a request for revenge of the nerd ,booger being like really in love and shy and trying to be "cool" and maybe he even presents himself with his real name in the moment cause hes so in aww of u .

You never thought that when you got to college the most friends you would make would be boys. Especially those in a frat. Well, turns out theses guys were all very kind and very welcoming. Saying how they would love it if you could be apart of their friend group. You agreed and turns out, it was the best thing that had happened to you.

When you were first introduced to the lambdas you were surprised. Most frat guys were either quite dismissive of women because of the focus on sports or they had too much attention on girls that usually came off as rude. But these guys treated you like a damn human. They all seemed accepting of you. Especially one specific guy. He was introduced by louis, as booger. You smiled at the name and said hello. He waved and went bac to his guitar. The first few times meeting him that's all he did. Play his guitar and make small talk.

One day you remember that you went to visit the lambdas for some help with your math paper. You had been struggling with this paper for a hot minute and decided to get the best minds in school to help you, which they did happily. As you were walking toward the front door. You opened it and looked back to Booger.

"See you tomorrow Booger."

As simple of a goodbye it was it infuriated him to no end. He put his guitar to the side and ran after you. He swung the door open quickly and called your name.

"Y/n!"

You turn to look at him and go to take a few steps closer. He sees this and suddenly gets flushed. Words are suddenly hard to remember. At seeing this you get a bit closer.

"Hey, are you alright? You look flushed."

He shakes his head and sniffles. He looks to the side, contemplating if this was even a good idea. Instead of blowing him off like most of the other girls do you stay, waiting for him to make his mind up. He lets out a very audible huff of air.

"My name isn't booger."

Smiling at this you nod your head.

"I know that. Of course its not Booger."

He nods. Of course in this moments he feels dumb for making that very clear.

"My name is Dudley."

This shocked you. Of course you knew he had an actual name. But Dudley just suited him. You smiled at the knew information. You looked down at the paper in your hands.

"Well that is a great name. I think I'll call you that from now on. I'll see you later Dudley."

You say as you turn around yet again and begin to walk back to your dorm. By the time you got out of sight Booger hadn't moved an inch. He had a smile on his. He had never been so excited for something. No he didn't ask you out like he wanted, but lord did it make him feel a whole new emotion knowing that from now on you would actually be calling him by his real name. He put his hand in his pocket and walked back to the front door. Upon walking through he was greeted by Louis.

"Wow. You actually told her your name."

He shrugs.

"Yeah whatever. Don't make a big deal out of it."

He sits down on the couch, picks his guitar back up and just as he places his fingers on the strings, he realizes he cant even play right now. All he can think about is you.

#booger x reader #booger #revenge of the nerds #dudley dawson x reader #dudley dawson

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currentlyfckingurmom · 11 months

Text

Her Song part 18

"Hey," I greet with a smile after I pull open the door. "Come in."

"Is the little booger still in bed?" Florence asks, looking around the living room for Syd.

"No," I say, laughing at the nickname. "She's still in bed. I'll go wake her up."

"No, no. Let her sleep a little longer. We've got time."

"Okay," I smile. "Have a seat. Tell me about these photoshoots."

We sit down on the couch and she hands me a cup of coffee. "It's no big deal. Just something for Vogue and-"

"Vogue? You think Vogue is no big deal? Florence, that's insane," I laugh. "For the record, I think you'd look pretty damn good on the cover of Vogue."

"I never said I was going to be on the cover," she counters.

"Well I'm gonna be pissed if you're not. You deserve it."

"Thank you." Our conversation comes to a pause as we just look at each other with tired eyes and bashful smiles. "Oh my god," Florence says suddenly. "I just realized that I brought you coffee and bagels and you literally own a coffee shop. That was supposed to be way more special."

"Flo, the fact that you cared enough to bring me coffee and bagels is all that matters. That makes it more special than you could possibly imagine. Stop being a dork," I laugh.

"So is Syd okay?"

"Honestly, I don't know. I'm trying to get her into the doctor's office for a check-up but-"

I'm cut off by my phone going off and I pick it up to check the lock screen, which is a picture of Syd attempting to play my guitar.

Dad: The flight is landing soon. See you and peanut at eleven!

"Oh, shit," I exclaim.

"What's wrong?"

"My dad is coming today. Crap, I totally forgot I have to pick him up. I can't deal with this right now," I sigh, running my hands over my face.

"Hey, everything will be fine," Flo comforts me, running her hand over my back. "I know family can be stressful, but you can handle it. And if you can't, then you can call me or Scarlett or Lizzie and we'll come rescue you. And by now I know that Ash always has your back."

"Thank you, Flo. I appreciate it. There's just a lot of history tied to him and everything back home, and as bad as it is, I just wish I could leave it all behind. When I see him, the only thing I can think of is being disowned by a whole damn town."

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. You wanna run away? If we leave now, I bet we can make it out of New York before his flight lands," she jokes with a smirk.

"As amazing as that sounds, I don't think that would be very responsible parenting."

"Hey, what time will he be at the airport? Maybe we can ride together."

"His flight lands at eleven. Are you sure? I don't wanna mess up your plans or anything."

"Darling, you're always welcome to mess up my plans. I'll have my driver bring my bags and meet us at the airport. If that's alright with you, of course?"

"Yeah, yes, that's more than okay with me."

"Okay. Cool."

"Cool."

Our idiotic smiling is cut off by the pattering of small feet coming down the hall. "Momma? Who are you talking to?" Syd asks as she enters the living room.

"Florence is here, honey. You wanna say hi?"

She approaches the couch and climbs up, sitting on my lap. She waves to Florence before pulling her blanket around her shoulders. "Hi, Florence. I puked in my bed."

"Syd, she doesn't need to know that," I sigh, shaking my head.

"Well I brought magical bagels that will make you feel better," Florence tells her in a whisper, like it's some big secret.

"Bagels?" Syd asks cutely, her interest now piqued. "With cream cheese?"

"Of course with cream cheese! What kind of monster would I be if I didn't bring cream cheese?"

"Text me when your flight lands, okay?"

"The second I land. I swear it."

We're standing in the middle of the airport, saying goodbye before we part ways. Florence is wearing a low hat in an attempt to disguise herself, and she looks utterly adorable.

"Good luck with your photoshoot," I say.

"Good luck with your father." There's an awkward moment of silence, both of us wanting to hug goodbye but knowing we can't in public. Stupid, stupid boyfriends. She offers a small wave before turning around and walking towards her gate.

I walk back out of the airport holding Syd's hand to keep her close. We move the car to the front and wait for my dad to come. Within a few minutes, he's walking through the doors.

"Grandpa! Over here!" Syd yells. He looks over with a big smile on his face as he approaches the car.

"Hey, peanut," he greets her, picking her up and spinning her in a giant hug.

"Hey, sweetheart," he addresses me.

"Hi, Dad. How was the flight?"

"It was alright. I like your car."

"Yeah, thanks." That ends our conversation. We don't hug. I've distanced myself from him and he knows it, but we both know that it's his and my mother's fault.

The drive home is spent in silence, except for the few times Syd pipes up with a random fact from the backseat.

When we get to the apartment, Dad looks around with a seemingly proud look on his face. This is the first time he's been to this apartment. He's only been to the shitbox we used to live in.

"You've done well for yourself, Y/N. I'm proud of you," he says, low enough that Syd can't hear.

"Yeah, well, I didn't exactly have much of a choice, did I?"

A grimace crosses his face, and I briefly regret saying it. But he's lucky I'm even letting him around his granddaughter after the shit he and Mom pulled.

"You have no idea how sorry I am, Y/N-"

"It's fine, Dad. Let's just drop it. You're probably hungry. I'll cook some lunch."

He agrees, and I move to the kitchen. I put on some music as I cook and listen to the faint sounds of Sydney playing with my dad. At least she has one grandparent, even if it's rocky. That's the only reason I haven't cut off contact with him. Or maybe I'm just overreacting. Maybe I was the one in the wrong.

You were never even wrong in the first place, right?

Yeah, I'ma just ignore you.

Walkin' towards you with my head down

Lookin' at the ground, I'm embarassed for you

Paranoia, what did I do wrong this time?

That's parents for you.

Very loyal? Shoulda had my back

But you put a knife in it

#florence pugh x reader #florence pugh

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i-am-hoo-iyam · 1 year

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Idk I still wanna write so

This is what selever does on a normal day. He bugs his mom in the middle of church service, he scares his dad, he messes around with other dimensional beings, he makes shopping take 20 minutes longer, he pays for his neighbors broken window.

“And He brought blessings onto this land witch He created” “MOM IM BOOOORED”. “Siddown church isn’t half over! Ahem sorry about that! Shall we continue”. “No”. “SELEVER! If you can’t be respectful during Sunday church then PLEASE LEAVE”. Someone else piped up from the back. “But church is less boring eith you!” “I’m a demon. I don’t even really worship god. I respect him because I love my mom very much, but imma go to the arcade or something… mom PLEASE stop dragging me to church!”

Selever got out of there and went to find ruv. Ruv was in the bathroom of their house carefully cleaning eye boogers out of his bad eye or whatever’s under there. Sel snuck behind him. “BOO”. Ruv got startled and poked his eye ( or wherever he has under the eyepatch). “(Insert string of Russian swears loud enough to crack glass) SELEVER HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I SAID DON’T DO THAT ITS NOT FUNNY!” “I’m bored”. “Scram”. “But I’m bored”. “Scram or I’ll wring your neck.” Selever scrammed.

Selever went to the park. There was a street blocked off nearby that looked like it was getting sucked into some sort of dimensional rip. Some skeleton guy with a giant paintbrush and some thread and a sewing needle was sewing the rip shut. It was almost finished and all that was left was to seal the rip and fix the road. Sleepover noticed a string on one end of the rip. “Huh what’s this”. He pulled on the string and it unraveled and the rip nearly sucked him in. The skeleton was just staring at it while holding his head. “Do you know HOW LONG it took to fix this rip that the blue haired human made while messing around where he shouldn’t? This rip nearly killed blue (swap sans)! And NOW I HAVE TO START ALL OVER”. The skeleton took a vial off his sash of vials. “Here have some Sorry juice so you’ll feel very sorry for ruining what took me a week to fix with no breaks”.

The skeleton took the coal and splashed it all over selever. Selever felt really really bad. He didn’t mean to. He didn’t know why it was a good idea to pull the string. He pulled a piece of used fum out of his o socket ant tried to use it to close the rip. “Bruh”. The skeleton facepalmed. “Your a being of magic right? Oh you never learned my name I’m ink! Anyways you know magic right? Since you created this mess why don’t YOU fix it”. “Wait if your the ink god guy who creates all then can’t you just snap your fingers and fix the rip?” “Nope. Two different universes with two different magics. If I tried to fix it with my magic I’d turn it into under tale Friday night funkin and this isn’t undertale”. Selever took inks paintbrush and went to the other side and used the paintbrush ink to seal it from underswap side. He teleported back. “Problem solved”. “Oh… I never thought of fixing it from the other side”. Ink vanished without a goodbye.

“Huh I wonder what I can do with this giant paintbrush?” Selever tried painting a donut but it turned into black ink mush cuz inks magic residue had worn off and the paintbrush only worked when ink used it. “Darn.” Selever got an idea. He pulled out a sharpie and drew a funny face on it. He graffiti’d his name. He sold it to skid for his allowance money. “OH BOY A GISNT PAINTBRUSH! Pump! Wanna go paint a giant Mona Lisa?” “Yeah! Can we make her a monster Mona Lisa?” “Of course! It is the spooky month after all!”

Selever ran into the bully and his goons. “Your a rapper right?” Selever snapped his fingers and turned bullies hair blue. “There now you look like a better rapper”.

Selever found his dad with a bandage on his eye getting groceries. “Here can you get this too?” Selever added s give bag of candy. “Put it back”. “Aw”. Selever put it back. “Can we get this”? Selever put a really expensive rc car in the cart. “Put it back”. “Aw”. Selever put it back. “OOOOO DONUTS! AND THEIR ON SALE”. He added a box of donuts to the cart. Rub looked at it and thought. “Go get another box”.

They sent to check out. “Hey look dad your in the news again”. “Huh… ‘breaking’ news… angry Russian breaks neighbors reinforced extra thick double pane window glass with Russian swears… in other words… nothing new in funkin city… look at what you did! You made me break the neighbors windows again!” “I said boo. I didn’t say the swears loud enough to break the windows”. Ruv glared at selever. “Your paying for broken windows this time”. “Fiiiiiiiine”.

#fnf selever #fnf #mid fight masses

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brittanyautumn333 · 2 days

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Tw: d3ath, grief

My nanny asked about my dad before she passed. Many times.

I told my dad she had passed. I called him at one of his 100 phone numbers and he happened to answer. Said he “always has time for me” when I asked him if he had a moment to talk. I told him the grueling details of seeing her body and how hurt I was. I went from changing her and feeding her favorite meals to her, to watching her grow yellow and cold as we waited for the funeral home to come pick her up. She passed in the night and was discovered at 5am, we rushed there before I even had a chance to get the eye boogers out of my eyes. The mortician showed up at 8am.

He consoled me, and told me he was “working” in the area so he would love to attend her funeral. Say goodbye to her. She had been looking for him. My aunt was going to pick him up where he was working.

He didn’t show up. For either of us.

He asked my aunt (by calling her 3 times just minutes before the service) to ask her if I was “mad at him”. I wasn’t mad. If he really knew me, he would know that I don’t get mad. I was disappointed.

He will no doubt use this as an excuse not to reach out for a while, because he thinks I am “mad at him” and that I want to be left alone. I have never said anything like that to him. My number has been the same since I was 14.

#spirituality #grief #daddy issues #forever unable #to #depend #on anyone else #but myself

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hunty627 · 3 days

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Here’s the script for genies and monsters unite.

One moonlit night, the genie team and their friends were sound asleep and all was calm and peaceful. Until suddenly, Dorie heard her little sister Caitlyn screaming in fear! Caitlyn told her big sister there was a monster in her closet. Ellie asked her what it looked like, but Caitlyn didn’t know. So the genies went into Caitlyn’s closet to investigate. When when they came out, they wound up in a whole different world. And that’s when they spotted 2 monsters. One was named Mike Wazowski. And the other was named James P. Sullivan or Sulley for short. They were playing with a cute little human girl who they call her Boo. The genies changed into their Kaiju fusion modes to blend in and they told them what was happening. When Caitlyn told them what had happened, they told them that they don’t use scream power, they use laugh power instead, which is ten times more powerful. Then Boo knew what Caitlyn was trying to say and she showed them a drawing she made of the very monster who scared her. Mike & Sulley knew who it was. They said his name was Randall Boggs. Caitlyn also explained that two of her boyfriends, Fergus & Marvin got scared of some monsters too. One was purple and had horns. Mike said it was Johnny Worthington. And the other monster had 6 legs. 14 fingers on its hands, and it had 5 eyes. Sulley knew it was Henry J. Waternoose III. They were put in jail for the crimes they did. But somehow, Randall bailed them both out. Sulley & Mike got their friends Fungus, Art, Terri and Terry, Don, Scott Squibbles, Tylor Tuskmon, Celia, Val, Smitty, Needleman and Roz to help. First, they went after Randall. But it was hard to catch him because he can’t camouflage. Then, Reanne set her glasses to infrared vision, allowing her to detect Randall’s body heat. When they found him, they gave chase, but Mirabelle got hit by the horns of Johnny Worthington & Ellie got trampled by the 6 legs of Mr. Waternoose! It was a rough monster battle! Waternoose tried to silence the genies for standing in his way, but Mike got a drooler cooler. It was the booger blast flavor, which was very sticky. The 3 bad monsters were soon stuck. And to finish the whole thing off, Sulley scared the 3 with the old Waternoose jump and growl! And the CDA came to take the 3 away. Randall vowed he’ll be back, but Boo just roared at him. After that, they all had a party at Monsters, Incorporated to celebrate their big win. They even went to Mike’s comedy class and tried all the interesting Monstropolis food. And Caitlyn learned it’s laugher they’re after. Tylor, Val, Fungus & Mike made Caitlyn laugh so much, she filled the laugh canisters to the max. Now they had enough laugh power to last for held a year. Sulley thanked the genie team for their efforts and Mike even gave them cards to remember them by. And official M.I. blue hard hats. And Boo even gave them drawings she made. The genie team said goodbye and they went back home through the door. Dorie was glad that Caitlyn has nothing to worry. Because next time a monster emerges from her closet, they’ll make her laugh by telling funny jokes. The end.

#genie team #my stories

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badaseyebags · 12 days

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Aww booger! At least it kind of matches with your outfit. Try soaking your pants in a mix of warm water and oxi- 🦊

omg thank you for the tip but i got home just a little ago and my pants have been soaking in the lip stain for a few hours,so i think i’ll say my final goodbyes😞

#i miss my lip stain already😞😞😞😞#🦊 anon

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catboyzilla · 2 months

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She's as lovely as always, my baby hasn't changed

Except for the hole that's in her forehead, you can see her brains

Nevertheless, our love is still forever true

Her eyes have withered, her skin has now a tint of blue

My baby's dusty and dirty, and wrinkled clothes

And now I notice, the maggots chewed off all her toes

The earth has been rather cruel to my darling sugar

Is that a bug upon her face? Oh, it's just a booger

I lean her head back to kiss her cracking lips

And then her neck crack, also does her hips

I must be gentle, my baby girl's a little rusty

A little dusty, but most of all, a little musty

I notice that, we lay together on the lawn

We lay 'til dawn, I notice her left eye is gone

We said goodbye and everything turned out alright

I'll see you again tomorrow night, because I need a

Girl that make me happy, a girl that make me cry

A girl that passed away back in 1985

A girl I plan to marry, a girl I plan to wed

A girl that I can choke because my baby is already dead

Cemetery lady, my cemetery girl

Cemetery baby, I want you in my world

Cemetery woman, we can still be down

You're more than just a corpse, you're a psychopathic clown

#one more post lol

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wondermentishere · 4 months

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not posting this for an audience, but since this a public account… ***TW: EATING DISORDERS***

ive recently accepted that ive had an eating disorder all of my life… my earliest memories of getting ready for daycare wasnt healthy at all. the way i examined and processed my body… tweaked my clothing with the knowledge of how important being desirable was.. i remember learning what being skinny meant and looked like. at daycare, i mustve been like 6 years old. me with a group of girls a couple years older than me were evaluating how flat this one girl’s stomach was. from that moment on, i held my belly tight and flexed in public at all times, a mechanism i know ill carry for the rest of my life. i remember being in my room alone, up late watching cartoons on a weekend eating a big bag of hot cheetos. i stuffed myself so full, i vomited all over my little sister’s trundle trying to make it to the toilet in time. i remember being in the 3rd grade looking at my school pictures, loving how you could see my abs through my tight blue shirt. i remember in the 4th grade, my mom bought us subway and i finished my meal before anyone else even started on theirs. she looked at me puzzled, chuckled then called me a nerd. i cried… that was the beginning of her insulting me as a reflex. she felt bad and asked me if i wanted her to go back to the restaurant to get me more. i declined out of humiliation. back then it didnt matter to me how much i stuffed myself. i was such an active kid that even when i fell asleep with a swollen belly, i woke up so empty it hurt.

5th grade i started making close girl friends for the first time since preschool. they always straightened their hair and thought i should to. boys thought they were cute, but no one liked me in that way. i was the nerdy goofball that didnt know how to groom myself properly. white stuff around my overly poked out lips and boogers constantly in my nose. i made my own outfit for the toderick hall play i was starring as a munchkin in and remember looking down at my clothes and feeling ashamed at how much better the other kid’s costumes were. my mom noticed my demeanor change whenever we were walking up to the venue. she told me not to be self conscious. waiting in the dressing room with all the pretty white girls was the first time i noticed how uncomfortable i am looking at myself in the mirror with other people, specifically women are around me. im still like that to this day. sometimes i submit to exposure therapy and force myself to acknowledge my reflection while im washing my hands. i dont understand why it is so painful for me to do. i remember hugging this boy i had the biggest crush on goodbye the last day of school and he called me dirty and disgusting in front of other people, including my bestfriend, after i walked away. she proudly repeated it back to me later that day. i just felt numb. i didnt let it penetrate me emotionally but i did feel humiliated and annoyed.

i just felt ugly in the 6th grade. kids were mean about my natural hair, i didnt have boobs like the popular girls. i just wanted to fit in and started wearing bows (i never wore bows) and wearing 2 bras to give the illusion of a more developed chest. my deceptive behavior got noticed once in the locker room and my ex bestfriend laughed at recalling the exposure over a decade later (i admit it was pretty funny). whenever puberty started to hit in the 7th grade is when i really started obsessing over maintaining my thinness. i felt so lonely and finally could identify my emptiness watching interviews of sullen musicians i adored. i was looking through pictures from the year before with my mom and she made a comment how i “wasnt boney anymore” like i use to be. that bothered me. i wanted to be as skinny as michael jackson. i wanted a “dancer’s body”. i didnt want boobs. i wanted to wear deep v necks over the flattest chest. i wanted to be on stage.

7th grade i purposefully started skipping lunch. mainly cause for the first time, i finally had friends i could count on to eat with everyday. they rarely ate lunch. we didn’t even go to the lunchroom, we just chilled in the band room during that time. i never had money to eat at school anyway and the lunches my mom packed me were embarrassing to eat in front of everyone. she was kind of a health freak and smushed wheat pb&js in a brown plastic kroger bag always got turned up noses from my peers. ive been embarrassed to eat in front of other people since the subway incident in the 4th grade and the fact i never had anything “cool” to eat didnt help either. sometimes my mom would make me lunch and i would let it sit in my backpack for days. gross shit. my mom sold herbal life and sometimes watery shakes were the only “meal” i was interested in downing for the day. i got my first iphone and had a calorie tracker on it. i would workout hard after karate and step practice, making sure i was in a calorie deficit to set me up for success the next day. i use to love waking up and immediately going to the mirror to admire how skinny i was. i loved my abs.. but still i was never satisfied with my body. this behavior carried over until my 8th grade year.

i remember being weighed for the school’s “Pacer Test” and noting the defeat i felt going from 114 lbs as an 7th grader to 120 lbs. my curves were coming in, my boobs were developing. back in the 6th grade i would wear two bras cause i felt like an outcast, this year i purposely only wore sports bras that i had outgrown at an attempt to bind my chest. i remember taking a break in the bathroom with my friend at a football game we were cheering at. i thought she was paying attention to something else and stopped flexing my bloated stomach for just a moment. she noticed and call it out “oh you got a gut on you”. i immediately sucked it back in and didnt really acknowledge her comment out of embarrassment. sometimes when we would wear the same cheer shirt to school she would go around asking boys who wore it better. i really did not like that shit.

the cycle of binging and restricting was very prominent throughout all of highschool. i finally could scrap up enough money to get pizza and hot cheetos everyday. i didnt have friends to sit with though and felt humiliated sitting in the lunchroom alone or with other random outcasts i barely said a word to. i considered eating in the bathroom like the movies but determined it too gross. so i would scarf down my food and either sit in the library on twitter or search for queer books until lunchtime was over. sometimes i would hide out in the girl’s lockerroom. i was a student athlete and conditioned pretty hard everyday. i remember walking around in the gym after practice and my coach told me i “looked fit” haha. i went back home and told my mom and she agreed with a hint of resentment in her tone. i would body check my stomach routinely. i just didnt like how big my arms were. they were toned but not muscular. they looked fat to me. my armpits to this day dont have that sunken look ive always wanted. i kept my chest strapped down at all times, wearing the same sports bra over and over again.

in 11th grade, i changed highschools and went from the loner jock to the infamous theater kid. i started to care about social injustice alot and was becoming alot more informed. my mind was consistently on learning, making art, and being silly on the internet. alot of the kids were my peers in middle school and the popular girls wanted me in their circle. i felt insecure plus i didnt really like them. they were kinda mean and too self-absorbed & not very funny. i wanted them to like me though and texted them making fun of our classmates and teachers during class. we sat together at lunch… they didnt eat (they had eating disorders too) so i didnt either. they would hangout outside of school and drink together and would never invite me. that shit crushed me even though i didnt really want to drink or even be around them. i just always felt like no one would ever consider me a real friend. i kind of sabotaged our relationship by playing a mean prank on one of the girls who accidentally snapchatted me half nude pics of her meant for a boy she liked. i wasnt attracted to her, but screenshotted the pictures just to get a reaction out of her. i thought freaking her out would be funny since she begged me not to open the chat in the first place. i assured her and her bestfriend that i deleted the pics after and apologized profusely. idk what was wrong with me.

i was always the kid in hella extracurricular activities cause it 1. interested me 2. kept me out the house. i would go all day not having breakfast and maybe a bag of baked cheetos for lunch, rehearse for hours after school then walk miles back home to no dinner because my sisters werent ever considerate enough to leave some for me. my mom never made them either.

sza’s hair really inspired me in 2015. i experimented alot with crochet braids my junior year and took “sexy” pics for the first time on my cracked ipad sitting on my mom’s bathroom floor. i couldve sworn that was my cutest year but my yearbook picture came out so bad a boy who had a crush on me even said it was ugly. i forgot to retake it. embarrassing as fuck.

anyway, i just really detached from the world and my body end of senior through college. boobs strapped down, body checking, working out hard, binging on snacks. i remember looking at freshman pics of me sophomore year with my first girlfriend and she told me i looked like a fatass loser lol. yeah.. i “loved” someone who would talk to me that way. freshman 15 definitely hit hard and i went home winter break with a balloon face. did kickboxing with my mom, lost alot of weight, cut off my hair and went back to school in january with people telling i looked like “a model”. i was starting to get more comfortable with my queerness so was open to more masculine presentation especially since i was hundreds of miles away from my mom and my gf really liked studs. from then on ive been in a cycle of not caring, neglecting myself in the name of freedom, trying new looks and sometimes liking it, constantly cutting my hair due to anxiety and dysphoria, sometimes really caring and craving validation. being feminine just to fit in.

now im at a place where i just want to grow out my hair, work, and starve myself until im 30 pounds lighter tbh. i want to get lost in my head and latch onto my creativity. i want to abandon everyone i know. thats what i want to do and i will. maybe not the abandon part tho cause i actually love my friends. side note: im pretty sure my undiagnosed adhd is a big reason why i binge. cant wait to get treated for that cause trying to control the impulse without medication is torture. plus, i heard stimulants make you lose your appetite :P

#diary #edanon #tw disordered eating

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leclerc-s · 4 months

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mamma mia! - part five

masterlist previous next

charles leclerc my brother raised a great question, baby names?

max verstappen you told your family already?

charles leclerc were we not supposed too?

daniel ricciardo i haven't told anyone?

mia tate this thing made headlines, how have your families not found out yet?

charles leclerc by some miracle i think. i had to tell my maman because arthur threatened to tell her. you don't have any idea how awkward that conversation was.

max verstappen i simply do not want to have that conversation with my father or my mother.

daniel ricciardo i haven't has the time to tell my parents.

charles leclerc anyways i think enzo would be a great name

max verstappen fuck that. we are not naming a child after enzo ferrari

daniel ricciardo i think sid works great.

max verstappen oh fuck you too.

mia tate what if, i don't know, this child is a girl.

daniel ricciardo in that case, honey badger works great

mia tate i am not naming my child after an animal

mia tate or after one of your teams or an f1 driver

max verstappen well there goes my idea of suggesting my dad or michael

daniel ricciardo i am not fathering a child named jos charles leclerc neither am i

daniel ricciardo you know what would be hilarious? donna.

mia tate oh hilarious. i’m crying from how funny that was 😐

mia tate is happen to like the name juliette in case anyone was wondering. helene is also quite nice.

max verstappen oh i get it charles leclerc i don’t? were we supposed to understand something from that? max verstappen mate... daniel ricciardo i also don't get it.

mia tate you two were literally cuddling last night, don't call him mate.

charles leclerc it'd be offensive if we had kissed, but it was only cuddling. i like to call him fucking booger daniel ricciardo who taught you that phrase? mia tate i bet it was marc, he was always calling me that growing up charles leclerc WRONG! it was abby!

goodbye new york, you've been good to me - mia tate

abigail tate what did you three boogers promise my sister if she moved to monaco?

max verstappen wow. i expected booger from charles but from you abby? this is a new low.

mia tate she's said worse. trust me.

lando norris now that seems like a story we should hear

mia tate no

george russell i was under the impression that abby was also moving to monaco?

abigail tate i am but not until the semester is over. i don't have the luxury of taking online classes. the struggle is real with architecture classes

abigail tate it's also too late into the semester to change schools. next semester i can change to a school in monaco or italy.

alex albon correct me if i'm wrong but isn't it expensive to move to a college out of the country.

abigail tate dad's paying for me. he's trying, to make up for his mistakes. of course, monetary things don't matter but it's the thought that counts isn't it?

daniel ricciardo do not say that in front of seb. he'll probably go on a whole tangent about that.

george russell since i don’t get godfather duties can the child please be named after me? george works for a boy and georgina works for a girl.

mia tate no. george russell I MADE A PRESENTATION WHY DON’T I GET TO BE GODFATHER OR HAVE THE CHILD NAMED AFTER ME? mia tate because i don’t trust any of you to look after a child? it’s the simple. as for the name, well, i sort of made up my mind on that.

daniel ricciardo you did?

mia tate yes, i did. max verstappen we can't complain, she is the one carrying a baby and we don't even know which one of us is the dad, not that it matters, but we can't argue. charles leclerc she does get final say in pretty much everything.

abigail tate she’s pretty set on juliette. she thinks it’s going to be a girl.

alex albon do you truly think the universe would let those three be anything but girl dads?

lando norris that’s a good point. it’s definitely a girl.

carlos sainz i think its a boy

esteban ocon i do too

pierre gasly i propose a bet! team boy v team girl!

abigail tate oh this will go over well

mia tate and this why none of you were godfather

mick schumacher i think it's a girl! and i think juliette is a beautiful name

mia tate this is why mick is my favorite.

charles leclerc rude but we knew that already.

miatate you know the drill, photo dump time!

tagged abbytate, danielricciardo, charles_leclerc, maxverstappen33, marc_tate

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marc_tate did me so fucking dirty with that picture mia

→ miatate it's what you deserve for calling me a future world champion incubator

→ marc_tate i regret nothing

abbytate i'm still mad you didn't let me take the cats home.

→ miatate where would we keep them abby? we're literally moving to monaco.

→ abbytate i would find a place, trust me.

user1 i just know food hits different when you're pregnant

→ miatate it truly does!

user2 someone call me back when these 4 confirm that they are in a relationship

→ user3 4 people in a relationship isn't normal?

→ user4 NOTHING ABOUT THIS SITUATION IS NORMAL!

landonorris ah, finally a picture where they all look decent

→ miatate you callin' me ugly norris?

→ miatate no ma'am. i'm calling the alvin and the chipmunks ugly

→ user5 oh my god, that works so well? charles is alvin, max is simon, and daniel is theodore.

→ user6 wouldn't daniel be simon because he's the oldest? and max alvin with charles being theodore?

→ user5 yeah but blue and red are max and charles colors. and daniel is theodore because everyone love theodore.

→ user6 that makes sense, i guess?

pierregasly boo! i should be here! and everyone knows it’s not a proper photo dump unless yuki is included!

→ miatate i don’t have pictures of yuki baguette!

danielricciardo i see you posted all three of us they wouldn't get mad that i'm your favorite.

→ miatate my favorite is mick...

→ charles_leclerc but out of the three of us? who is it?

→ maxverstappen33 i too would like this question answered.

→ miatate none of you, you all give me headaches

→ danielricciardo well that's just mean. we do not.

→ charles_leclerc i am an angel! i don't know about max or daniel but i am an angel!

→ maxverstappen33 okay inchident boy

→ charles_leclerc shut up sid!

→ danielricciardo okay children, calm down.

→ maxverstappen33 shut up old man!

→ charles_leclerc shut up old man!

→ miatate yeah, old man, shut up!

georgerussell63 let it be known that i’m still mad i didn’t get godfather

→ miatate eh, you’ll get over it. but just know you won’t be favorite uncle either

→ georgerussell63 YOU DON’T KNOW THAT!

→ arthur_leclerc she does when lorenzo and i exist!

→ scottyjames wrong baby leclerc! it's clearly going to be me!

nicholas latifi can someone please come get arthur leclerc from williams hospitality? he's arguing with george over who's going to be favorite uncle.

mick shumacher i don't know why they're arguing when it's clearly going to be me and alex.

alex albon right! i got the pets mick gets everything else.

nicholas latifi please just come get him. they're shouting and i can hear them from my drivers room

charles leclerc i'm on it. sorry about him nicholas.

nicholas latifi no problem charles, just please tell your brother that next time he should start a shouting match outside of williams hospitality when cameras are around.

max verstappen QUICK WHAT DOES ONE DO WHEN THEIR FATHER ASKS THEM IF THEY GOT A GIRL PREGNANT?

sebastian vettel YOU HAVEN'T TOLD YOUR DAD YET MAX?

max verstappen AM I SUPPOSED TO JUST TELL HIM "HEY DAD DANIEL, CHARLES, AND I ACCIDENTALLY SLEPT WITH THE SAME GIRL WHILE IN GREECE AND NOW SHE'S PREGNANT AND WE DON'T KNOW WHO THE FATHER IS!"

lando norris like that'll go over well with jos

abigail tate YOU HAVEN'T TOLD YOUR DAD? MAX EMILIAN VERSTAPPEN-TATE-RICCIARDO-LECLERC WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?!

lance stroll that is a long as last name.

charles leclerc why does daniel's last name go before mine? why am i last?

abigail tate reverse alphabetical order? shouldn't you be used to that by now?

charles leclerc low blow abby low blow.

max verstappen WHAT DO IT DO?

sergio perez let it be known that he has barricaded himself in my drivers room.

daniel ricciardo i'll be right there.

charles leclerc i guess me too?

mia tate reluctantly, i'll be there time, no better time to meet jos verstappen than now.

abigail tate can't believe this is the first time you're meeting an in-law. i'll come with so i can bite ankles if necessary.

20 minutes later

abigail tate well that could not have gone any worse.

mia tate all hail christian horner i guess?

charles leclerc abigail did almost bite ankles.

daniel ricciardo i did not know that many foul words before today.

mia tate i also didn't know mad max would be this attractive.

max verstappen that's what you're focused on? not that my father called you a whore?

mia tate i've been called worse by the internet. and fingers crossed daniel's dad is nicer to me. or yours and charles mom's.

charles leclerc my mother is a saint.

max verstappen my mother put up with my father, what do you think?

daniel ricciardo i think my parents are great!

mia tate we get it, you have a healthy relationship with both your parents and both of them are still alive.

abigail tate must be nice huh?

charles leclerc right? wonder what it's like to have both alive.

daniel ricciardo i hate all three of you

mia tate no you don't liar.

abigail tate he might hate me.

max verstappen no, he doesn't. he got drunk that other day and said you were like an annoying little sister

abigail tate i'll take it!

taglist: @six-call @barcelonaloverf1life @janeholt3 @queen-aria-things @camdensreg @mycenterfold @woozarts @vellicora @nichmeddar @thisismereading @inloveallthetime @baw-sixteen @floxly @dear-fifi @chiliwhore @ilove-tswizzle @nataliambc @greigreyhiyyih @tygecjjd @cataf1 @nothaqks @formulaal @lichterfee @prongsvault @kaa212 @julesbabey1 @julesbabey @georgeparisole @smnthnclj @hobiismyhopeu @melissayalene

strikethrough means i couldn't tag you

¡leclerc-s speaks! i’m not quite sure if this will be my final post of 2023, but if is, thank you to everyone who reads or likes or reblogs or comments, on my works. it means a lot that you enjoy these silly stories i came up with. so happy new year! now, someone had to a dick in this story. i know nothing about that man besides what is portrayed in the media. so, that clouds my judgment on him but i don’t know the guy to formulate an actual opinion on him. as said in the disclaimer this is no way me making an assumption about him.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

#leclerc-s #f1 fic #f1 instagram au #formula 1 fic #f1 smau #f1 social media au #formula 1 #f1 #formula one #mamma mia series #fanfic #fanfiction #daniel ricciardo x female oc #max verstappen x female oc #charles leclerc x female oc #f1 x mamma mia crossover

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