#god damn these lannisters dude

[creganofhousestark]

(Screenshots because I’m one hundred percent sure i will be blocked for stating facts that go against the op’s headcanons if i were to reblog my opinions under their post and then will proceed to rant away about the eViL aRyA sTaNs whose crime is, well, reading the books, you know?)

So, i had the misfortune of coming across this one post by @agentrouka-blog when i was going through the main tags and, god! The amount of bs i have to wade through in the name of fandom experience is concerning at this point.

Whenever did Sansa cover for Arya? When she was declaring her as a traitor to a bloodthirsty Cersei Lannister that it was her sister with the traitor’s blood and not her after her father’s imprisonment? Or when she threw Arya under the bus at Trident?

“She blames Sansa for things she never did” dude there was never one moment where Arya blamed Sansa for things she never did. Hell, Arya didn’t blame Sansa enough. Guess it’s time to reread AGoT lol. Sansa “it’s your butcher boy’s fault for dying because he attacked the prince” is blameless y’all *mic drop*

“Violently attacks her because that’s her opportunity to blow off steam after a traumatic 4 days” yes because your sister is basically accusing of treason when the reason behind her actions was purely defense. Apparently you must be level headed in the face of your your sister refusing to be honest in a moment when the outcome (which is Mycah living or dying) depends on her word. If Sansa’s really as smart and intelligent as stansas claim then Joffrey’s actions at the Trident should’ve opened her eyes. Ned was the Hand of the King, the King’s BFF. She was under no pressure to maintain diplomacy. Hell, Ned was right by her side, reassuring her and encouraging her to speak her truth. What would’ve happened if she were honest? The betrothal would’ve been called off? Ned would’ve lost his spot at worst? Big loss, the North would have minded it’s own business as usual….and Sansa’s southern dreams would have shattered. In that moment Sansa chose her dreams and fantasies over her sister and remain blind to the kind of a monster Joffrey was.

Moreover, being focused and worried about herself and her desires is not necessarily a flaw, Sansa’s just more human. She’s got five heroes to compete against, which is why she may appear more flawed than Arya. But honestly it’s all subjective. Arya’s character is simply rich and has a hell lot more depth, that’s all.

Mostly Ned’s favouritism BRO NED CHOSE TO GIVE UP THE HONOUR HE VALUED hell he chose a traitor’s death for her and, goddammit there’s not one moment where he favoured one over the other. Do not talk about the damned flowers scene in Sansa I, Ned would’ve grinned and thanked Sansa for the same bleeding flowers. Sansa was just pissed that Ned didn’t reprimand his child for behaving like a typical 9 year old child. Which, nobility or no, is quite common in that society. Hell, we have textual evidence of Catelyn playing with LF and Lysa making mud pies at 12. It’s almost as if Sansa can’t stand anything short of Sansa 2.0 from her sister.

Arya’s miles better. Just ask GRRM. He wrote the books.

Anyways, thanks agentrouka for reminding me how brilliant of a writer George Martin is. The man picked stereotypical heroes and gave their stories not-so-stereotypical twists as their arcs progressed. An exiled powerless princess who earned it all and more through her blood sweat and tears, a non conformist noblewoman who’s gone through an extraordinary number of trials, a powerful noble dwarf unwanted by his own blood, a disabled boy with unparalleled magical potential and a bastard from two powerful, magical families who was practically thrown aside.

#asoiaf #a song of ice and fire #arya stark #sansa stark #asoiaf fandom discourse #george r r martin

[4everflowercore]

„DILFs I fell for during my ♥️ teen and young adult years“

Daddy issues? Yes.

1. Alan Rickman (as Severus Snape)

I was like 11 when I got into Harry Potter and my obsession about A.R. focused mainly on Severus Snape. I swear he formed my character during puberty and my entire taste in man. I basically made an Harry Potter OC out of myself and made my entire personality like that Slytherin girl that has a secret romance with her potions teacher… and I made it everyone’s problem. Damn I was annoying

2. Benedict Cumberbatch (as Sherlock Holmes)

I think I joined the BBC Sherlock fandom around the time season 2 dropped and fell so hard for Sherlock. I even when to the first Sherlocked CON in London only to be madly disappointed when I actually met him. I can’t describe it but as I walked into the photo area and stood right next to him I instantly knew I don’t like Him. Like we didn’t even speak much it was just an instand bad feeling that I still have many years later. At the time it felt like a very bad breakup.

3. Mark Gatiss (as Mycroft Holmes)

Always liked his character in BBC Sherlock but I honestly fell in love the same day I lost Benedict. Coping mechanisms? Maybe. Idk.

3. Tom Hiddleston (as Loki)

Honestly what does it say about me that I always fall for the bad guys? It got as far as me cutting my hair short and getting a ridiculously expensive cosplay. Still I’m only here for the older version of Loki. Honestly after Ragnarök everything went to hell and I don’t really enjoy anything that came from the MCU after that. Not even from my beloved god of mischief.

4. Adam Driver (as Kylo Ren)

Look at this face and tell me you’re not in love. Isn’t he just the cutest? And don’t we Love a man that destroyes things when he’s angry?

5. Jared Harris (as Valery Legasov)

Chernobyl somehow triggered something in me that I thought was long dead. It may be because of my families history in the Soviet Union.. I don’t know. But lemme tell you I haven’t produced fanart that excessive in quite a while.

6. Jin-Yi Han (as TalTal)

(I had to make this gif myself because the fandom is f*cking dead) I swear I always join the party years to late. But Jin-Yi Han awoke a new love for Asian culture in me. I never had much interest for KDramas but honestly this one spoke to me. He became a comfort character.

7. Charlies Dance (as Sardo Numspa)

The first time I saw him as Tywin Lannister in Game of Thrones I thought Damn Daddy please beat my ass… and the rest is history.

We can kinda see a patern here. Don’t we? (Mostly)Mean dudes with longer (dark) hair and anger management issues. Also I’m a slut for authority.

I’ve alway been an artistic person so I flooded the internet with fan art and sometimes fanfiction for all of my beloved characters.

#sherlock #bbc sheelock #benedict cumberbatch #mark gatiss #charles dance #mycroft holmes #loki #tom hiddleston #jin yi han #the empress ki #marvel #severus snape #harry potter #jk rowling #tywin lannister #game of thrones #fangirl #adam driver #star wars #valery legasov #jared harris #hbo chernobyl

[writingsofwesteros]

Dude……Professor Lannister??

Like

Robyn walks in all innocent. “Professor Lannister?”

“Yes”

“Professor, please, there must be something I can do to up my grade. I need to get this scholarship.

I have this AU in my head where Catelyn passes away so Robyn steps up and helps Ned take care of all the younger siblings! While still going to college. She is a great student so almost all classes, even with bare minimum work because she is so busy taking care of all her younger siblings, she is ACEING! Except………AP English Literature. Professor Lannister never gives anyone, even top students, good grades. She is damn near failing his class. A lot of girls complain, I’ve tried to offer Mr. Lannister “extra credit” (if you catch my drift) that man is made of stone. I wore my sexiest lingerie, and he didn’t flinch.

Robyn is desperate, she needs to pass! She is willing to do any extra credit. Of course Sweet Robyn means legit extra credit…..not the idea the other girls had.

“Please professor, I’ll do anything, any extra credit, any extra work, please, I can’t fail my family. She says with tears in her eyes.

He walks up to her.

To be honest, he’d been eyeing Robyn Stark since the moment she stepped into his classroom. Her long deep auburn hair, full sapphire eyes, pert perfect handfuls and her long luscious legs.

He’d never been so bewitched by a student. He never allowed himself to be, but this sweet siren had him enraptured.

“I might have a few ideas Miss Stark, if you’re up for the challenge?”

“Yes yes please Mr. Lannister, I’ll do anything!! “Very well my dear. Sit on the table.”

“Uh, I, uh um, ok. Yes professor.”

He then stand between her legs and pulls her into him and kisses her as though meaning to devour her.

*in Robyn’s brain. Oh my God, Professor Lannister is kissing me, the hottest professor who’ve I’ve had a crush on for forever is kissing me.

She wraps her arms and legs around him pulling him closer as they kiss as though it’s the end of the world.

He pulls away. “Does that extra credit sound amenable to you?” He says.

She looks up at him with her kiss swollen lips and wide eyes, then after a moment she gathers herself, and says, I don’t know professor, I think I maybe need all the work before I decide, as she winks at him. He growls at her, pulling her into his arms and cupping her ass as he devours her lips again.

!!!

I love how others were trying to get the extra credit hehe.

The best start of an AU!!! He really is just so bad

#professor tywin

[ur-frndly-neighborhood-memer1]

Lucius Malfoy vs Jaime Lannister?

While I was looking for the images of Joffrey Baratheon and Draco Malfoy comparing, I saw this chart

Lmao how exactly is Lucius better looking than Jaime F*cking Lannister?

Lucius is supposed to look like an older version of Draco. And Draco wasn't exactly a Brad Pitt...

(Speaking for the books. Because both Jason Isaacs and Tom Felton are so damn charismatic and cute actors)

Jaime on the other hand... He was described as literally one of the most handsome men in the world! The golden hair, wild green eyes, and the perfect body that we all know even though it was never particularly described (Just imagine a 6'2 ft tall guy with a dorito proportion, 6 packs, biceps and triceps...)

This is the guy who is supposedly good-looking according to Malfoy stans:

(Basically a normal pale dude)

And this is the man she told you not to worry about:

(I downloaded these arts a while ago, so I don't know the artists who drawn them. If you know them, please tell me so I can give them the credit)

CONCLUSION: Jaime is objectively hotter and a total dilf

.

.

.

Though if we speak for the show and movies, I'm not so sure. Because Jason Isaacs, unlike how he's described in the books, is a handsome man.

And even though Nikolaj Coster-Waldau is a good-looking man with a certain charisma, I feel like he lacks the striking beauty of Jaime in the books. I mean even when he was badly wounded, sleep-deprived, hungered, literally at the rock bottom both physically and psychologically, Jaime was still described as half corpse and half god.

So, the other CONCLUSION: They're both handsome in the show/movies. So whatever...

(But my heart always goes for Jaime♡)

#asoiaf #harry potter #a song of ice and fire #Jaime Lannister #lucius malfoy #Hp #Got #game of thrones #I'm really enjoying these comparings lol #Lucius Malfoy vs Jaime Lannister #they're both dilfs tho #And yeah I luv Jaime sm #Draco Malfoy

[wearetheunholyfamily]

top 5 female characters? 👀 (across any media)

perfect question 🖤

Except for #1 this isn't in any particular order!

Cersei Lannister from asoiaf!! My love my life my sun and stars 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

Kira Nerys from st ds9.... trauma dyke stomping around in her boots and learning how to have Fun™ with the party worm. She's perfect

Ahsoka Tano from sw tcw. baby lesbian she's amazing

Camina Drummer from the expanse (the show since she's SO different in the books lol) god. saving Holden's life and making sure he knows she ONLY did it for Naomi? her speech exposing Marco's supply depots? "LIVE SHAMED AND DIE EMPTY"????? GOD DAMN, DUDE

At this point I'm forgetting basically everything else I'm into except for like. the mummy movies so let's go with Catra from she-ra. lesbian has trouble dealing with an abusive mother and feelings for women? Well Uh That's Me! sure made for an interesting experience watching the show with my mom and her saying she relates to Catra bc of HER mom lmfao 🫥🫠

Honorable mentions include Jadzia Dax and B'Elanna Torres from ds9 and Voyager, Evie and Anck-su-namun from the mummy movies, Sansa, Arya, and Ellaria from asoiaf, ok i could keep going forever i need to stop now-

#thank u!!! #asks #neoncomets #about

[minetteskvareninova]

Minette Watched We Light The Way: Assorted Thoughts

- Pretty Thing Of The Episode: Laenor and Rhaenyra’s wedding dance! Not a physical thing, I know, but as most of my Magnificent Century fam knows, I am a sucker for dance scenes.

- They are so cute together in general, like I would totally ship them if I could. Especially since Rhaenyra x Criston Cole crashed and burned so spectacularly. As it is, Laenor is still my baby and I love him (like the rest of Velaryon family, really). Poor guy needs a hug.

- It was only for a fleeting moment that me and Laenor had our very own chevalier d’Eon, untill the dude (I don’t even properly remember his name, what a shame) talked shit and not only got hit, but was pummeled to death by the sheer force of Criston Cole’s mental breakdown. Got, this little shit could’ve wrought so much havoc, but I guess they already have Daemon for that, so he had to go. Still, I am going to miss him so much. I am not crying, you’re crying.

- Not as much Velaryons as I hoped, but I guess it can’t be an oops all Velaryons episode, so I guess I’ll have to just be happy with what we did get. Corlys was very awesome for the little he did, as was Rhaenys, who will always be MY queen. Still not enough Laena.

- I see Alicent has entered her “taking my frustrations in life out on everyone, my ex-friend especially”. It seems she is becoming the Alicent I know and hate from the books, which... I get it, but again, I don’t have to like it. I do support her budding friendship with Larys Strong. Like if she has to go to dark side, she might as well do so hand in hand with someone who actually appreciates her.

- Speaking of people entering their villain phase, Criston Cole went trough a hell of an arch this episode. Like this fucking himbo asks Rhaenyra to run away with him, just when she got the first taste of power and found a way to satisfy both her duties and desires. But you also get why he would do something so stupid (well, you get it because he himself tells you). I almost felt sorry for him, but then that fucking idiot had to let chevalier d’Eon goad him, and FUCKING MURDERED HIM. Bet this isn’t what you people imagined when people said “Criston Cole will have sex with Rhaenyra and Alicent will then pity him”, eh? Bet you feel stupid for assuming the worst of the writers.

- Daemon, who has been on the dark side for so long he has built a nice seaside villa there, of course only stayed out of King’s Landing long enough to murder his own wife, and then hurried back up, because God forbid someone else wreaks havoc there in his absence. And then was given a middle finger by Rhaenyra, at which point he immediately started courting Laena. Not to mention his entire interaction with Rhea’s cousin, which... The fucking audacity of this man. I hate him. I love him. I don’t want to see him anywhere near my girls, but at the same time, I think I finally get the appeal of this dude.

- The Lannister dude who once lost a dick-measuring contest with fucking Viserys I. seems to have become a regular source of cringe comedy and literally nothing else. It’s what he deserves.

- Damn, did Lyonel Strong’s scene with Viserys remind me that I don’t hate the old king completely. Also, I can’t help but feel sorry for him because of his deteriorating health. And for all of the other shit around him he has to deal with.

#house of the dragon #minette watches hot d

[a-libra-writes]

I read your post about Tyrion's trial and Tywin's second wife's reaction towards it. I really enjoyed reading the part about Tyrion's feelings towards Tywin's second wife and her children and I was wondering if you could do a separate post including Cersei and Jaime and their thoughts and feelings on the second wife and the children she has with Tywin? If you wanted you could also include Tyrion again if you have anything you want to expand on about his feelings.

me whenever yall ask me for my long-winded opinions

so!! no surprise I have many thoughts on this dynamic and I rlly wanted to explore it in that fic, or some other one, but agh I was having hard time putting it together. So Im glad I can just dump my thoughts here. Let’s do Jaime first because Cersei’s opinions are exactly what you’d expect lol.

Initially, Jaime just goes with what people want of him. Doing it for love, and all that. He gave up being the heir to Casterly Rock because his sister - his love - asked it of him. He believed that was worth it. And by the time he’s an adult, when he’s well into the Kingsguard, after his roadtrip from hell and opening his eyes to what his sister truly is ... He still doesn’t want it. 

Jaime was raised to be the Perfect Heir. The Lannister Son, Tywin Lannister’s oldest. Handsome, excellent with the sword, amiable, a powerful family. Still... it wasn’t what he truly wanted. Jaime said it himself; he’s only truly alive when he’s “holding a sword or making love”. And let’s be real, he’s pretty aloof to things that aren’t immediately important to him. By the time the second wife comes on the scene, he’s the Kingslayer, he’s a Kingsguard, and he’s sleeping with his sister. As far as he’s concerned, she’s not his business.

However, he’s very curious about his father remarrying in the first place. The news is everywhere in the Red Keep. Tywin Lannister remarrying - presumably for an heir, because why else - and that means ... Jaime immediately thinks of Tyrion when he hears the news. He thinks of how hurt his brother must feel, how angry. Jaime spends several days in a dark mood, wondering what things would have been like if... maybe if Tyrion had been born differently. Maybe if their mother lived. But he realizes that’s pointless thinking.

He doesn’t attend the wedding, because Cersei refuses to. It’s a mild scandal, the Queen not attending her father’s second marriage, but Robert doesn’t go either and the drama is blown over through Tywin’s sheer force of intimidation + I HC that "second wives" and any wife after that aren't treated the best, especially after the husband has already had grown children. Jaime doesn’t see her for a long while. It’s when she comes to the Red Keep, when he and Cersei are forced to meet her. And...

He’s not sure what he expected. Jaime is underwhelmed. She’s pretty, naturally. That was expected. She’s dressed in Lannister colors, she’s amiable and charms most people she meets. She’s clearly intelligent. She’s so ... so good. And she isn't afraid of his father. It’s strange, Jaime thinks. What a strange choice his father made, but he doesn’t want to think of it. He doesn’t want to care, but Cersei does, and he anticipates she’ll only become more irate.

I feel like Jaime purposefully makes distance between himself and his stepmother for many reasons - His own tendency to keep others away because he assumes they’re assuming the worst of him, Cersei’s hatred of the woman, guilt toward Tyrion, apprehension to his father’s intentions, and so on. There’s something almost disturbing about the way his father listens to her, especially later in their relationship - the way he takes her counsel, sits close to her, touches her hand in front of everyone, and so on. Jaime doesn’t remember much of his mother; he knew his father loved her, but... seeing his cold, ruthless father being so careful and considerate is just unsettling. He doesn’t want to linger for too long. 

The second wife would no doubt try to speak to him, try to be friendly. It’s difficult. Jaime feels like something is off with her.

When she shows what she’s capable of, when he sees that iron hand under the silk glove, it clicks into place. That’s why his father chose her. 

I think she and Jaime wouldn’t truly connect until well after he’s lost his hand, when he’s still somewhat doing Cersei’s bidding, when he and his sister against his stepmother, Ser Kevan and his half-brother. Jaime can’t even call the boy that, or any other children the second wife might have. When he looks into them, he sees his father, but also his step-mother. 

He thinks the boy will make a good Lord of Casterly Rock. Like Tyrion, he hopes the boy will have more of his mother than this father, but he doesn’t get his hopes up.

Time for Cersei. Oh, Cersei.

It’s easy to write that she’s jealous and angry, because, yes. Duh. But it’s a lot deeper than that. Like her brothers, she’s suffered under Tywin’s “parenting”. And unlike her brothers, she remembers her mother. She’s been through trauma guys, especially in the books where you can clearly read her thoughts, memories and delusions. Joffrey got that cruelty from somewhere. Cersei got it from somewhere.

When she hears the news, she nearly cuts the tongue of the messenger. Her father, remarrying? To who? What woman could possibly measure up to her mother, who they said was just as capable as her father, if not moreso? She’s disgusted by it. She blames Jaime, even though she’s the one who convinced him to take the white cloak. She curses Tyrion, as if he could have stopped it by being “better”. And most of all, she curses her father, for not considering her as the rightful heir. Because this is the only reason this marriage is taking place - Casterly Rock needs a “proper” heir.

She’s right about that, of course. That was Tywin’s reason for remarrying. The first time she meets her “stepmother” (oh gods does she refuse to use that word) it’s months after the wedding. Maybe almost a year. Honestly, Tywin doesn’t care about her absence; it makes things easier. By then the second wife might even be pregnant, though not visibly so, and that’s a minefield in and of itself.

Cersei hates the second wife immediately. There’s no way that wouldn’t happen. Everything about her is a fault, no matter what she does. It wouldn’t matter if she was the only daughter of the wealthiest or oldest house in Westeros, it wouldn’t matter if she was a Targaryen with a dragon. When speaking to Jaime and Tyrion, Cersei uses “that whore” to refer to the second wife.

Listen, Cersei has a lot of internal misogyny. I mean, Westerosi culture just does that. What makes it worse is the genuine hurt of her father “moving on”. The fact her brothers don’t seem to remember as much of Joanna as she does. Then there’s the jealousy - she should be the one her father is consulting with. Is she not just as cunning as a man, just as ruthless, as capable of getting done what needs to be done? Is her husband not a useless oaf who couldn’t politic his way out of anything, besides maybe a brothel?

 Cersei is convinced her father looks down on her because she’s a woman. Tywin doesn’t take her seriously because she’s rash, temperamental, prideful, cruel... ... ... I wonder how she ended up that way 🙄

Her anger, jealousy and hurt only worsens when the stepmother gives birth to a son. Oh, it would have been so good for the bitch to die in childbed, to give birth to a daughter - better, an ugly, deformed daughter that would kill her on the way out. No, it just had to be a healthy son. It’s a son she watches her father hold - even if it’s briefly - when he still refused to hold Joffrey. A son her father looks at approvingly, a son who will soon learn swords and politics so he can take what’s her’s.

It makes her physically sick.

It’s no secret to Jaime and Tyrion that she wants the boy dead. The second wife doesn’t trust her worth a damn, but she doesn’t voice her concerns to Tywin. He doesn’t think Cersei is stupid or rash enough to do such a thing. And in a way, he’s almost right - one evening when she’s visiting Casterly Rock, she angrily storms into his office, telling him he’s ruining the family. The boy is too young, he’s probably not even a Lannister, he must be a bastard - even Tyrion would be better -

Tywin gives her such a fearsome response, she feels herself turning small and powerless in an instant. She leaves his office, fighting her tears, feeling like a helpless girl again. She hates it. It takes all of her willpower not to go to the boy’s room and smother him right there. If her stepmother crossed her path then, Cersei truly believes she’d do something drastic.

It’s difficult for Cersei to think of the second wife with any objective thought. Doubly so for the son, who she can’t even call brother without acid coming up in her throat. In her greatest delusions, she dreams of killing the boy and taking the Rock from him. It isn't his birthright, it's her's, she's the oldest... Westerosi inheritance laws be damned.

I’ve discussed Tyrion’s feelings in that previous ask and in this fic. Gods, it would be such a whirlwind of emotions for the poor guy - his self-destruction and bitterness might be accelerated, but there might be something freeing in his father just outright finally disowning him and moving on. ... ....  Yeah, nevermind. It just turns to more hatred. He and his stepmother have a really ... complex relationship where they both know what makes it difficult and unfair, they both know Tywin is the cause of this hurt, yet they continue to be good to each other. Sometimes it hurts Tyrion to be that way, so he has to distance himself from her for a while.

It’s the same way when he deals with his half-brother. Tyrion isn’t sure if his younger brother’s affection and admiration makes him want to smile or cry.

I imagine the son as intelligent, capable, a good swordsman in spite of his young age and well on his way to becoming a knight. I feel he’s more observant of adults than people think, he’s more on the quiet side, he has those eyes that are so eerily similar to Tywin’s, and that same nose. I think by a certain age, he’s very, very aware of what his half-siblings think of him. And as he gets older, he becomes increasingly aware of what sort of man his father is. 

I think he really, really misses Tyrion. Missing his father, after how Tywin died, well ... it’s complicated. At least he has his mother and Uncle Kevan, and maybe Jaime. 

#libra headcanons #libra says #hope this all kinda makes sense and flows aight haha #god damn these lannisters dude #the only family with worse family dynamics is the greyjoys and thats debatable #sidenote i HC any other kids Tywin+SecondWife might have arent as emotionally strong as the oldest son so he protects them a lot #both from tywin and cersei and anyone else #tywin lannister x reader

[ladystoneboobs]

In songs, the hero always saved the maiden

one of my favorite ways that grrm plays with old tropes is how no stereotypical male hero gets one of the big damn heroes moments rescuing a female character. not only do ned and robb stark die tragically, they don’t get to rescue sansa or arya or anyone else. jon snow, the orphan with hidden royal identity, is in many ways closer to the standard hero than other main characters but his biggest rescue is defending his male bff sam. 

in westeros we only see male characters rescuing female characters when the dude is very morally grey or otherwise does not fit the physical ideal of a true knight and a lot of the times the girls being rescued don’t exactly fit the ideal of a noble lady either:

first we have tyrion saving cat’s life in the raid by the mountain clansmen. tyrion in the first book is at his least dark but still morally grey, and physically he does not measure up to the dashing heroic mold. he’s a dwarf, not a knight, a “half-man”, and he’d never been in combat before. catelyn is a lady in damsel pose when he rushes in but she then returns the favor by killing the next guy herself. and there’s the fact that they’re enemies and he’s only with her because she had him captured at swordpoint based on a false accusation.

then there’s sandor clegane with the stark sisters. sansa during the riot is probably the most typical innocent defenseless maiden example. sandor is possibly handsome on one side of his face, but the other part is grotesque. (seriously, the books describe him as having bone showing beneath blackened skin with red cracks. is that even possible?) he is a kingsguard but decidedly not a knight, saying there are no true knights and that they’re all just killers. in fact he tells sansa that “If there are gods, they made the weak for the strong to play with." and “If you can't protect yourself, die and get out of the way of those who can.” which is rather contradictory since he just saved her life days before and stated he wasn’t acting out of lannister duty, which she was just trying to thank him for. (even his horse is off from the fairytale ideal because instead of a nice white horse he has a black stallion mean to everyone but him and named after the god of death. which is perhaps why the horse is absent when sandor finds sansa in the riot, both riding back on her horse, and he’s also on foot when he finds arya at the red wedding.) when he travels with arya and saves her at the red wedding it’s even less hero/maiden rescue stereotype. he’s with arya because he kidnapped her for ransom, she’s never fit the feminine standard the way sansa does and she’s in disguise as a peasant boy with a bad haircut from sandor leading people to think she’s his son. someone else relevant that actually was a peasant boy? mycah the butcher’s boy, murdered by the hound for the crime of playing with arya. oh, and his red wedding rescue involves hitting her in the head with an axe and is annoyingly framed as a death fake-out. all of which leaves arya feeling pretty conflicted about her abductor/bodyguard.

next we have sam tarly saving gilly and her son by leading them from craster’s to the wall. sam is not only the only man on this list who never murders anyone, he’s one of the most morally pure characters in the series, but physically he is not the he-man warrior hero type at all. he’s a fat guy who spent years being abused by his toxic misogynist father for failing to live up to violent standards of manhood, for being too soft and girly. he’s a self-proclaimed coward who can’t recognize the bravery in his own voice when he’s the only one to speak up for gilly and her baby at craster’s. gilly and two of the other wives have to prod him to run away with her, but when they come under wight attack he doesn’t hesitate to try to protect her while still thinking himself a coward. and gilly is neither a noble lady nor a pure maiden. she’s not just a wildling but an outcast among the wildlings as one of craster’s daughter-wives. her child is an “abomination” born of incestuous rape and it’s likely she is too if her mother was also a daughter-wife. sam is the only man who can help her because no one else in the night’s watch, including jon snow, even wants to. jon’s later baby-swap only works because no one else cares what happens to gilly or her baby.

then of course we have jaime’s bear-pit jump to save brienne, one of the most dramatic heroic moments. when we first meet jaime he is meant to look the part of a fairytale hero, the beautiful blond knight, what jon snow thinks a king should look like. but he has a bad reputation as an oathbreaker and kingslayer and his big character establishing moment is pushing a child out of a window “for love”. over the course of his journey with brienne we see a different side of him and he loses his handsome knightly exterior. this transformation is partly temporary by his own work, shaving off all the golden locks on his head while keeping an unkempt beard as an attempted disguise, and partly permanent after his right hand is cut off by the bloody mummers. the rest of his body can recover and he could look pretty if the stump is not visible, but he is disabled now like his victim bran and his brother tyrion. because he has a lot of training to do to learn how to swordfight with his left hand, he is no longer the fearsome and fearless fighter he’d been for so long. which works ok because he doesn’t need a sword to save brienne, there’s no actual fighting the fucking bear, instead he has to shield her with his body and rely on his escort to shoot the bear for him. on brienne’s side, she is “still maiden” as she reassures jaime, and is a noble lady by birth, but fits the sexist standards of a ladylike maiden even less than arya. she chooses to live like an armored knight instead, cannot perform femininity and is seen as unfit for the prescribed role of her sex due to her very body, seen as too mannish (as sam is seen as soft and girly) and downright “freakish” (like tyrion). always rejected as unsuitable as a woman, she is not allowed to be a knight either though she is more a “true knight” than jaime or most of the knights of summer she served with in renly’s camp, simultaneously judged as too mannish and derided as a warrior because she is not a man (the inverse of sam and tyrion being seen as not real men because they cannot be knights). the ordeal jaime saves her from, fighting a bear with a useless sword while wearing an ill-fighting dress, serves to mock her lack of traditional femininity and her attempts to perform a traditionally masculine role. by the time jaime comes to save her he has finally seen her (in a dream) as “almost” a beauty, and “almost” a knight.

lastly, we have theon’s escape from bolton-occupied winterfell with jeyne poole, the other very dramatic heroic rescue and probably my favorite. theon as of adwd shares traits with all the guys listed before him. like jaime he starts out as a hot, confident warrior but has since lost his fighting prowess after mutilation by his evil captors (jaime’s maiming captors were even serving house bolton at the time). like jaime he betrayed a king and is hated as an oathbreaker, though like tyrion (and young jaime) he was also affected by his father’s bad reputation before committing any crimes himself. like sandor, he murdered peasant boys, but he did so to pass them off as bran and rickon stark, the former of whom was crippled by jaime in a failed murder attempt. like tyrion and jaime, theon is now a cripple himself, and like tyrion (especially after losing his nose) and sandor, his new looks can be considered grotesque. in fact, his transformation into a starved and scarred white-haired man missing teeth, fingers, and toes (and possibly even his genitals) made him almost unrecognizable to those who met him before, including even his own sister. (just as jaime is not at first recognized on his return to king’s landing with brienne.) but whatever the exact state of the physical “manhood” between his legs, he has lost all male privilege living as ramsay’s slave and certainly no longer thinks of himself as a real man after his torture, just as sam can’t think of himself as one after years of his father’s abuse. (tyrion and one-handed jaime are also not considered “whole” men) theon as reek thinks of himself as weak and lady dustin called him a craven, as sam called himself. when jeyne meets theon again in their new roles (as “arya” and “reek”) he thinks he can’t save her because he’s not a real man and that she shouldn’t expect him to, just as sam felt when he first met gilly until she and two of the other wives convinced him he had to help her himself. sam thought jon snow was more fit to save gilly, and it’s jon (and melisandre) who set off the plot to save jeyne because they think she’s arya. and as theon has similarities with tyrion/sam and jaime/sandor, jeyne poole shares similarities with the stark sisters and with gilly. jeyne is forced to marry ramsay under the guise of “arya stark” and they share some physical features if not the right eye color, but it was sansa she grew up closer to, being best friends who theon thinks of as two of a kind, liking romantic songs and lemon cakes and bullying arya. jeyne has a house name and her father was an important member of the stark household as steward, so she’s not just a peasant and she grew up a peer of sansa/arya, but theon knows that politically she’s worth nothing compared to an actual stark girl. jeyne isn’t a lady and it’s implied she’s no longer a pure maiden when she returns to winterfell, which is where the similarity to gilly comes in because nobody but theon cares what happens to jeyne as herself. theon has to be convinced into the escape like sam at craster’s, but it’s only him acting for jeyne’s sake, knowing the others would all stop if they knew who she really was. the wildlings jon/mel sent don’t give a shit about jeyne, just as mance and the other wildlings never cared about gilly and craster’s other victims, and theon knows jon snow wouldn’t go to such risk for a girl who wasn’t his beloved sister, just as jon wouldn’t consider trying to help gilly. and like gilly was at craster’s, jeyne is a sex slave as ramsay’s wife, and she was already “trained” to be one in her time with littlefinger. both gilly and jeyne offer to be sam’s/theon’s “wife” instead of craster’s/ramsay’s but that’s not why either man eventually decides to help. and just as sam remains unbelieving in his own bravery as he helps gilly, so theon remained unbelieving in the hope of their escape the whole time he was escaping with jeyne. yet despite all his doubts theon chose to keep going for jeyne’s sake, as sam did for gilly’s, and he remained drawn to her just as the reluctant anti-heroes before him were with the ladies they saved.

#asoiaf meta #valyrianscrolls #tyrion lannister #sandor clegane #samwell tarly #jaime lannister #theon greyjoy #asoiaf #(c)lsb #if I could take a wife I would sooner have you than any princess or highborn maiden #i know you too. i know your name.

[sheepofice]

So I’m rewatching Game of Thrones: Season 1

(fun fact, it still has a 9.2 rating on iMDb)

*dundunDUNdundundunDUNDUNDUUUUN*

oh gods

YOU ARE SUCH BABIES

JUST ITTY BITTY BABIES!

---

And now you’re saying goodbye to each other like you’ll see each other real soon and everything is just gonna be dandy. Ugh.

---

Mmm. Sansa was annoying. She did end up my favourite but jesusfuckingchrist, Sophie Turner is just way too good at being the annoying girlish idiot there!

---

Yeah. Way more nudity than actually needed, and this comes from a bi person.

tHis Is GRitTy rEaLism WiTh bLoOd aNd GoRE (but all our women have shaved vaginas and armpits and plucked eyebrows because, ugh, gross!)

---

Jon Snow annoys me. Just as a character. With his constant confused puppy eyes and absolute honourable idiocy. (Another fun fact, when in high school I participated in the drama club once and our director was mightily confused when she first watched GoT. “Is that... is that fkn KIT?!” and apparently they were together in drama art-something in the UK a few years prior, and he had just been some random dude in her group).

---

Wow, way too long since I watched (and read), I had actually forgotten how early Bronn joins the show! He’s just sitting there at the tavern going “yeah, sure, pay me and you can have my room”

---

Syrio was SO DAMN COOL! I LOVE that guy!

---

Bronn. You Are A Gift.

---

That Scene where Tywin Lannister is first introduced. “Yeah, Charles, here’s a deer, can you gut it while you talk? Great!”

---

Dany, listen to the people around you that say this woman is evil. Please. She’s not gonna help your man. Please listen to people around you that might actually know better, because they have lived more than you.

---

My brother made me watch this at the start. He had already recommended Firefly to me, which I loved, so I tend to heed his recommendations. He said this show WOULD surprise me. I thought he meant Viserys getting killed, which did surprise me in a nice way.

I was NOT prepared for Ned Stark being beheaded. I still remember my “WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL HAPPENED, NO FUCKING WAY?!” speech aimed at my brother after that episode.

#a song of ice and fire #game of thrones #a song of ice and feels #rewatch #sanrion #what do we say to the god of death

[laufire]

Your turn: Rank all the sortings according to their sexiness.

Before getting to the combinations-

IMO, the sexiest secondaries are, in order: Lion > Rapid Fire Bird > Snake > Regular Bird > Bookkeeper Badger > Courtier Badger. Lion and Snake primaries are about as sexy to me (it's about internal primaries!! Maybe Lion a little more. Snake is more ~romantic than sexy idk); then Bird, then Badger. Now xD

I elaborated on the top 5 here so I won't be doing it again.

1. Snake Lion. Some of the sexiest members: Meg Masters (SPN), Dutch and Aneela (Killjoys), Cersei Lannister (GOT), Anne Bonny (Black Sails).

2. Double Snake. Selina Kyle (DCU), Bela Talbot (SPN), Nikita Mears (Nikita), Miranda Barlow (Black Sails), Kenna (Reign).

3. Lion Snake. Elizabeth Swann (POTC), Jasmine (Disney), Laila Rose (@nectargrapes's The Essence of The Equinox).

4. Lion Bird. Ruby (SPN), Jesse Flores (TSCC), Adelle Dewitt (Dollhouse), Lola (Reign).

5. Snake Bird. Max (Black Sails), Echo (The 100), Naomi (The Expanse), (dark!)Kaia Nieves (SPN).

6. Double Lion. We are DAMN sexy. Internal primary intensity, Lion secondary bullheadedness, capacity for improvisation, commitment to higher callings. What's not to like, idc xDD. Rosalee (Underground), Rikki (H20), Allison Argent (Teen Wolf), Kisa (FDTD).

7. Bird Lion. Again, Lion secondary? Sexy. And that free thinking/truth seeking nature of Birds combined with that can be *chef's kiss*. Raven Reyes (The 100), Harley Quinn (DC).

8. Double Bird. They are not higher because I can't think of almost any sexy Double Bird... but the one I can think of, Rowena MacLeod, is sexier than anyone has ever been, ever. Note that down. Rapid Fire Bird, of course.

9. Bird Snake. It's a combination that's given us many sexy people. Priya (Dollhouse), Darla (Buffyverse), Camille (Shadowhunters), Inej (SAB).

10. Lion Badger. The highest a Badger secondary can aspire in my ranking as long as it comes accompanied by a damn great Lion primary. Tahani (TGP), Madi (Black Sails), Fire (Seven Kingdoms series). HM to Castiel, who I'm not at all attracted to because he's very dude-shaped (I did feel THINGS when he wore a female vessel that one time though), but who is objectively sexier the more unhinged shit he does; see swallowing a bunch of souls and becoming God or manipulating an angel (while dripping blood over his open shirt ofc), stealing and swallowing his essence, then killing him -both these instances got called sexy IN CANON, because the characters of SPN are Like That.

11. Badger Lion. They get to avoid the down 5 (?) thanks to that sweet Lion secondary. Though tbh with some exceptions, like Paige (Charmed), Faith (Buffyverse) or Shaw (POI), I tend to see them more as cute and crush-worthy than sexy. Claire Novak (SPN), Idelle (Black Sails), Daisy Johnson (AOS).

12. Badger Snake. The Snake secondary can be REALLY sexy, and they have two of my foremost crushes among them: Emori (The 100), and maybe Lana Lang (Smallville). But the rest of them are on thin ice!

13. Snake Badger. Most of the ones I can think of are guys; I like Tiana, though (Disney). But I see them as more sweet and caring than sexy, yeah.

14. Bird Badger. I tend to think of them as too mellow, maybe unfairly. M'gann Morzz (Young Justice) could pull off sexy unhinged shit though, good for her. Billie the Reaper (Supernatural) is another good one.

15. Badger Bird. Idek these guys. Where are they? Poison Ivy is the hottest one by far, certainly.

16. Double Badger. Unfortunate sorting for me. Avasarala (The Expanse) and the Maroon Queen (Black Sails) can get it, so I guess it sometimes mixes well with hard power for me. Greer (Reign) was at her sexiest when she had that too (Kenna would agree).

#missbrunettebarbie #replies #talking to the void #my thoughts #sortinghatchats

[lilsherlockian1975]

The Nose Knows

A little soulmates AU, mostly fluff. Here’s part one. This is NOT beta’d, sorry for any mistakes. Huge thanks to @mel-loves-all for helping out with editing the images since I’m an ignorant goose penis when it comes to all that business. Blame me for the quality of the pics... it’s what I picked out for her. ~LiL~

-o-o-o-o-

He catches it on a breeze. It hits him like a physical blow and he instantly knows what he’s smelling, if not... who.

He and his cousin Daven are sitting on one of the few available benches on the Quad. Addam, his best friend since childhood, is talking about some girl he’d met at a sorority mixer the night before but as soon as the scent drifts his way, Jaime pretty much tunes out the sordid tale of sloppy, near-anonymous sex. It’s a gorgeous Spring day, not a cloud in the sky and no hint of rain for the first time in at least two weeks. This fact alone has driven most of the student population out of doors, making it almost impossible for him to quickly assign the scent to its owner.

Jaime is instantly ill at ease, which is unfortunate as moments ago he’d felt entirely in his element. He and his twin sister had celebrated their twenty-second name day the weekend before and prior to the scent, he’d been feeling at the very top of his game. Now he’s... confused and excited and anxious all at once.

Less than two months and he will be finished with this gods’ forsaken town and its massive university. He’s already been accepted at Crakehall School of Art & Design for his post-grad, which is, incidentally, where he originally had planned to study. His father’d had different ideas, forcing Jaime into the business programme at KLU. Thankfully, he had managed to slip a minor in Architecture into his degree by selling Tywin a load of shit about wanting to ‘propel Castlery Corp. into the modern era’. The minor had added a full year to Jaime’s studies and without a major in his chosen field, he will have to take supplementary classes at CSAD but he’s certain it will be worth it in the end.

None of that matters now. Tywin Lannister had died of a massive stroke seven months ago. Jaime supposes he should feel worse about that; should feel some kind of loss or sadness, and maybe he does, though not for the reasons most sons would for the death of a parent. But the old man was never a real father. He’d been indifferent toward Tyrion, dismissive toward Cersei - though he could occasionally be somewhat warmer to his only female child - and constantly demanding that Jaime ‘live up to the Lannister name’. Jaime can feel sympathy for their mother, of course, she did love the old bastard, but neither he nor his sister are overly damaged by the old man’s death. Oddly enough, their father’s death seems to be affecting his little brother the most.

The scent assails him again and this time he stands, walking towards it, leaving Addam sputtering objections and calling him names. Jaime doesn’t care. The only thing he cares about is the originator of that smell.

He passes small groups of fellow students, all equally excited about the respite from the spring rains. The Quad is packed, of course, so it’s no easy task. Not to mention that he probably looks like some kind of weirdo, walking around, nose first and… sniffing. But he’s being driven by something entirely out of his control. 

Though he’s never really given much thought to the idea of soulmates, he knows they exist - his Uncle Gerion and Aunt Briony are soulmates, for instance, but it’s rarely talked about within the family, almost as if it is some dirty secret. Actually, for some unknown reason, talking about soulmates seems to be taboo in ‘polite society’. Uncle Gerion - his favourite uncle -  however, is quite outspoken against Lannister Family tradition and societal norms. The phenomenon, as far as he knows, is very rare these days and Jaime has never once even considered the possibility for himself. 

Now… Now there's no doubt. He can smell her - them? - whoever! Jaime’s never been attracted to men, but somehow he knows that if the gods have seen it fit to match him with a man… so be it! 

Shaking himself, he chuckles as he moves to another group of students. It won’t be a man, he thinks. Surely the gods would have given him some kind of inclination towards his own sex if… Suddenly, he’s engulfed with the scent. They’re close, they must be!  He turns, following his nose like a damn toucan. 

The crowd thins a bit; it’s the top of the hour and people are rushing off to class. Jaime’s eyes and, yes, his nose, zero in on his target. Shit! It is a dude! He’s taller than Jaime by maybe an inch or so with short, straw-like blond hair, broad shoulders and… He’s just about to resign himself to a future that he’d never even considered (okay, so he’s maybe had the odd thought here and there about other guys - everyone has, right?! Right?) when they turn around and…  

“You’re a girl,” he says without thinking. 

She (oh, thank the gods she’s a she!) narrows her eyes, straightens her spine and glares. “Yes, I am. And you’re not very original, I’m afraid,” she says coldly before stalking past him. 

What?! No! She’s… she’s supposed to know. She’s supposed to smell him too. What in the seven hells is going on?! “Wait!” Jaime calls out but she doesn’t stop. He can’t give up, he just can’t. Sprinting to catch up, he reaches out for her, wanting to stop her, to talk to her. He doesn’t make it that far, though. Just before he touches her arm, she jerks back - maybe she saw him in her peripheral vision, maybe it’s some strange side effect of their connection, he doesn’t know - but when he sees the look in her unbelievably blue eyes, he’s the one flinching away. 

“I don’t know who you think you are,” she practically growls, “but you can’t just go around insulting people, chasing after them then touching them as if it’s your right!”

“But it is,” he replies lamely because... how doesn’t she know?

Her responding laugh is mocking and he can’t deny that it hurts him in a way he never imagined being hurt. Shaking her head, she sneers as she looks him up and down. “Guys like you are all the same…”

There are no guys like me, he thinks but luckily, this time he holds his tongue.

“I know I’m an easy target - hard to miss, low hanging fruit and whatnot - I’m just not in the mood for this nonsense today.”

Jaime knows he should give up, regroup and try again later, but patience has never been his strong suit. “I wasn’t… It wasn’t an insult. I was…” ‘Surprised’ sounds insulting and really, how does she still not know? His mind scrambles for a word to properly describe his condition. Finally, he settles on, “Confused?” though it unintentionally comes out as a question.

This seems to only further enrage the girl. She takes a step back, draws a deep breath and, once again, shakes her head. “Find someone else to help you figure out your sexuality!”

Okay, there’s a story there, Jaime’s sure of it but he doesn’t have time to ask. “No-no, you’re misunderstanding me. I know I’m not gay.” Although the fact that he considered it for thirty seconds or so is something he’ll deal with later! “I’m saying that…”

“I really don’t care what you’re saying.” Again, her eyes travel over him and Jaime has never felt so judged in his entire life. “It’s nothing new, it’s nothing I’ve not heard before. Do you really think you’re the first prick to want to screw with me? I’m guessing it’s another bet. Who put you up to this? Red? Bushy? If it was Hyle, I swear to the Seven...”

“None of them! I don’t even know who you’re talking about!” When he thinks about her words, an intense feeling of protectiveness overcomes him. “What bet? What did they do?” 

Her pale, freckle-covered cheeks turn an interesting shade of pink as she hitches her messenger bag higher on her shoulder before crossing her arms over her chest. “Nothing. Never mind. Just… Just leave me alone. Please.” The last word comes out softly, pleadingly and it just about breaks Jaime’s heart. Turning, she starts to go.

“I’m not a creep!” he calls out, managing to stop her escape. Looking around, he notices that, miraculously, the Quad has pretty much cleared out. If their fellow students hadn’t been in such a rush to return to class he and the angry girl would have surely drawn a crowd. He takes a deep breath and tries to calm himself before continuing, “And I’m not a prick. I am sort of an arsehole, but not - I think, not like those guys you mentioned. Whatever they did... hurt you enough to make you make that face…”

She whips around. “What about my face?” 

With a sigh, he says, “It looks sad. Too sad. It’s not supposed to.” And what does that even mean? he wonders as the words leave his mouth.

She’s surprised for a split second, then all emotion seems to drain from her features. “I don’t know why you’re doing this but please just… leave me alone.”

So he does. For now.

-o-o-o-o-

There is a very good reason that Brienne doesn’t know ‘who’ Jaime is. This is just the first part, I’m working on the next bit. Please let me know what you think. Thanks ~Lil~

#jaime x brienne #jaime lannister #brienne of tarth #uni AU #modern AU #game of thrones

[eyeslikefoxglove]

Episode 10 - Tywin Lannister called, he wants the Rains of Castamere back & once again, Foxglove cheers when someone gets shanked

Hiiiii! Welcome to episode 10 commentary! I’m doing this one right after episode 9 because for once in my life I started on this early enough in the day I can get more than one single episode in. Hope you enjoy!

Before I descend into several “wtf is wrong with this guy” rants, let me point a funny to y’all. The corpse that WWX checks for pupillary changes is not only breathing, you can see his carotid pulse jumping on his neck.

Ok done.

WHAT THE FUCK THAT’S A LITTLE GIRL WHAT THE FUCK.

Fuck this creeper oh my god. I know he’s supposed to have a tragic past and be cute and charismatic but I just want to shush him every time he opens his mouth.

(XXC truly looks like an elven prince doesn’t he)

Aaaaaand WWX gives zero fucks about your dramatic exit stage right.

He also gives zero fucks about the fight to the death happening right in front of him, I mean, why would he when he can flirt with LWJ instead?

Speaking of said fight, I really hope they sped up the footage of them spinning through the air, because if whatever machine and harnesses they used truly spun them so fast I feel for the actors/body doubles.

Hey XXC that’s your boyfriend right there!

Today is really not XY’s day is it.

(That disgusted face WWX makes is pretty much a visual representation of what I feel when XY tries to be cute. Seriously)

SHUT UP XY MY BOY IS HAVING A FANBOY MOMENT.

I can’t believe I’m saying this but he’s got a point. Not in this case, because these five are actually good people but the rich and powerful are indeed a bunch of hypocrites. *Softly plays Eat the Rich*

LWJ is a hairsbreadth away from slapping XY out of his faux-innocent act and I can’t say I fault him tbh. And WWX is fucking smug because he is the king of being a little shit and this amateur got nothing on him.

Is Zhu Zanjin wearing eyeliner or are his eyelashes actually that incredible?

I’m making pained noises because I keep wondering what would’ve happened if WWX had asked XXC for help after people mounted a witch hunt against him and why do I keep doing this to myself?

WWX: *talks about his boyfriend*

JC: *eyeroll*

Oh my god this bit is so painful. You can see how starved WWX is about finding the smallest connection with his mum and my soul hurts.

And LWJ’s face watching them go. He’s probably just realised this was a dream you could have, and there it is, walking away. I’m gonna go make myself some tea and eat some cake or something, I deserve it after all this emotional turmoil.

(Aaaaaaand there goes XY being a fucking creep again)

LOOK AT MY TWO LIL CUPCAKES BEING FUCKING ADORABLE WHEN THEY GET PRAISED. LOOK AT THEM.

We’ve already established that I have the survival instincts of a concussed lemming but NMJ is a dude I want to get into a shouting match with. I don’t dislike him or anything and he’s badass, but watching this is obvious a five year old with an attitude can push his buttons. And he’s both a political leader and has a whole baby brother to take care off, you can’t allow yourself to get so angry you contemplate murder in your living room my dude. Furthermore, I know his way of cultivation makes him even more unstable and prone to Qi deviation; but instead of finding a way to work around that this idiot is ok with dying young and leaving everyone who loves him fucking devastated. Because why? It’s the way of his clan? It’s traditional? It’s honourable? Fuck that, no wonder NHS dislikes sword fighting so much if that’s going to eventually kill his big brother.

NMJ: I am a just and frank man, I fear nothing in presence of sinners like you.

Me, with a megaphone: HUBRIS IS A BITCH

The One Braincell Trio being MY fanboys gives me life *insert another million canon-divergences in which they befriend MY and everything is less Lannister red as a result*

THIS ASSHOLE IS2G SOMEONE SAYS SOMETHING LIKE THAT ABOUT MY MUM AND NO ONE WILL FIND THE BODY.

Ok, NMJ called Lan Yi “the great talented leader of the Lan”, I want to pick a less violent fight with him now.

Wei “let me be damn sexy while drinking” Wuxian back at it again.

WUJI IS ON! MOONLIGHT! ROOFTOPS!

WWX: Lan Zhan I’ll sleep on your roof tonight

LWJ: Wei Ying I have to go

WWX: Lan Zhan I’ll sleep on your roof tonight

LWJ: Wei Ying, there’s room in my bed if we snuggle.

There, I fixed it. (Here I come again, joking to hide the pain. Parting is such sweet sorrow and all that)

... oh hey I’d never noticed how big Wang YiBo’s hands are and now I’m in trouble. Which is funny, cause LWJ is v much not my type, but Wang YiBo apparently is now? I mean, I’ve reblogged stuff about him because he’s ridiculously beautiful but...

*falls down a google images rabbit hole*

...

Yeah I can safely say I’m into Wang YiBo’s badboy-prettyboy-coolboy-gremlinboy attitude.

Anyway back to the show:

That was a fucking great sword throw and I love the little smirk MY’s wearing.

... what did I just see?

I don’t know how to describe it, but when WZL sticks the tip of his sword into the flat of NMJ’s sabre and drives him back and you see then go through the frame in front of WC? That’s like the most ridiculous anthropomorphic version of a train dragging a car along the tracks. All that’s missing is the “nyooooom” sound.

Speaking of WZL that’s one coolheaded dude.

Ok, I’m going to go down a Meng Yao rabbit hole again. Brace yoselves.

At risk of sounding like NHS I really don’t know why MY would’ve set XY free. I mean, if he gets XY and the Yin Iron back to WRH he’s got the chief cultivator’s favour... but everyone and their mum wants WRH out of the scene, including as far as he knows Daddy Dearest. He’s clever enough to realise there’s going to be a war, so he might’ve though that if he put himself up as a spy this soon it would’ve benefited the, yet nonexistent, SunShot Campaign. In the book he also murders his bully of a superior right before “defecting” and becoming a spy, and much like in here, NMJ catches him and stabbing happens. Do I think he, like the Jins, was playing both sides during the war? Yeah, but in this instance if I were him I wouldn’t trust in the benevolence of a man who makes puppets out humans for funsies, especially seeing how much he gets bullied.

Now if we go the other direction, of wrong place wrong time, MY doesn’t seem displeased with the Nies. I mean, NMJ and NHS like and respect him as far we’ve seen, NMJ even follows his advise. Why would he want to risk his fucking neck against NMJ just to get a potential in (that again depends on WRH liking him) to spy in a potential war? Call me a hufflepuff, but I’d stay put. Right before NMJ finds MY murdering someone we hear the voice of he asshole captain who loves to mess with MY, same captain that wasn’t present when confronting WC and that was really fucking drunk last night. I’m not saying this man works for the Wens, but hangovers make you sluggish and tired, who’s to say XY didn’t actually break tf out if this yahoo was the one guarding him (back again to the bit when MY asked the captain to post extra guards and the captain told him where to stick it, we don’t know if he actually doubled the guard) and MY walked in on it. Now this asshole has the perfect scapegoat! The *insert his preferred MY slur* did it! He saw it! And MY either panics or snaps and gets stabby.

Listen, it’s murder either way, and I won’t pretend MY doesn’t have a whole alphabet of plans for every situation, but damn I cheered.

Shut the fuck up WC.

My one track mind is shrieking because MY has a stab wound in his chest and he’s just... chilling? (Like a villain lol)

Did y’all see the fan smacking the hand bit? Now that I’ve seen the whole thing is evident, but that’s pretty much the same exact show as at the beginning with the “mysterious man”. Ooooohhhh I love the hints!

HOLY FUCK NMJ IS CRYING (my 3zun ship is sailing y’all can’t stop me).

Speaking of 3zun if y’all could point me to nice fics where everything doesn’t go up in flames for these three idiots I’d appreciate it.

And that’s all for this episode. Thanks for reading.

#cql #the untamed #mdzs live action #mdzs #foxglove watches cql #foxglove watches the untamed #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wangxian #jiang wanyin #jiang cheng #nie huaisang #nie mingjue #meng yao #jin guanyao #3zun #Foxglove cheers when someone gets shanked #again #foxglove babbles

[lightofthemoonglow]

my liveblog of beyond re-animator

Oh boy here we fuckin go guys

to quote Michael Jordan: “fuck them kids”

so the science boys had neighbors this whole time????

glasses kid can’t act for shit 

hey don’t talk shit about ‘primitive witch doctors’ u little turd. some of my ancestors were peruvian witch doctors and they were more useful to society than you’ll ever be

who just drinks whole glasses of milk?

this little turd is named after hp lovecraft, isn’t he?

WHO WRESTLES WITH THEIR SISTER LIKE THAT?

when my siblings and i would fight, it would be fists, hair-pulling and some wwf shit

my brother once chucked a hardback copy of goblet of fire at me and it hit me in the back of the head. 

but our heads never went between each other’s legs

and he just went...right there huh

oh thank god a zombie

huh my sister is named emily

RIP Emily I guess

howie is fucked up for life 

haha you can see glasses kid crying in the background in the scene where howie is just standing outside his house

YES HERBERT IS HERE THANK GOD

Don’t manhandle him, he’s like half your size

okay howie picking up the reagent makes sense bc i’d do whatever Herbert West asked me to do.

the theme music isn’t as good this time

I wonder what Dan did with his life

Hope he’s okay

a rat is here

u go, Herbert. do the jail science

hmmm daddy af

moncho u fucking moron

yes, i do want you, Herbert

ratty is a stupid fuckin name

if i hear dubious one more time...

oh hey howie

he looks like the kind of person who says ‘gee wilikers’

oh hey laura is in the fast and furious movies

which i would rather be watching now

tokyo drift is actually good

side note: i had more fun watching the trailer for fast 9 than this movie

okay the warden isn’t even trying to seem normal

hill was better at not being creepy than this dude

WHEN CARL HILL CAN ACT MORE NORMAL THAN YOU, YOU NEED HELP SIR

the warden kind of looks like an older version of my baby brother and i don’t like it

‘a personal relationship with their tools’

Herbert is at least smarter than some of the guards

that one dude looks like a vampire

did...she hurt her ankle?

how the hell did she hurt herself?

i’ve fallen down stairs, been hit by cars, been in fights with dudes half a foot taller than me and none of those even sprained anything

‘are you the new doctor? cute’....bad dialogue bad

stop yelling at the nurse, howie!

okay damn Herbert your eyes

Herbert’s reaction to being called doctor says a lot and you can’t deny he’d be into being called that in bed

is the nurse not wearing anything under her nurse coat?

i miss Dan

‘for five minutes’ actually made me laugh

honestly, i feel validated a bit by this movie because in all my fics that bother to mention the fallout from Herbert’s shenanigans, I wave it away with ‘coverups’ 

howie why do you want to work with him?

honest question here. 

howie, what did you expect??? when you handed him that syringe 

how did you graduate from medical school at all, howie?

12 months to his sentence...i’ve never been to jail or prison but I don’t think that’s how jail or prison works

Dan you traitor. You were at least nearly as at fault

Plus, you creeped on poor Gloria so much

I miss Megan and Francesca

yes, moses, this movie is hell

oh god this flirtatious dialogue is so fucking bad i hate it hate it hate it

reminds [him] of emily?????

oh hell no no no no no

LAURA RUN! RUN AWAY!!!!!!

okay this is making Dan and Gloria look normal

EW YOU JUST SAID SHE REMINDS YOU OF YOUR SISTER AND NOW YOU’RE HOOKING UP

I miss Dan

Herbert just shoving boxes is better than any scene with weird ass Howie Lannister

Herbert doing science and looking like a snack is literally all this movie should be

I’m watching this on Tubi which had ad breaks and I’ve never been happier for ads in my life

I DID NOT NEED TO SEE HOWIE’S ASS OR THAT LOVE SCENE

Herbert’s ass or no ass, movie!

Howie you’re an idiot

I miss Dan, Meg and Francesca

Hmm that newspaper pic of Herbert

I’ll see you in the yard...damn

That shot of Herbert holding the syringe of the new batch of reagent is like visual Viagra because holy hell

Ugh this creepy warden

NPE is dubious science at best but damn Herbert makes it sound so good

though honestly, i did really poorly in most of my science classes 

and fuck, i said dubious

oh yes the Herbert head tilt

“that’s the way to the hole” “it certainly is” 

Herbert I will give you directions to my-

Shut up Howie, Herbert dgaf about your problems

Pendejo sums up my feelings about this script tbh

Laura is also a fucking idiot

So she and Howie are perfect together

well, the vampire is dead

Oh gross ew

i hate this part so much that I’m actually uncomfortable

‘bark’ oh fuck no

I hate this scene so much that I want to cry 

RIP Laura, I guess

species to species is where you draw the line howie?

none of this is right!

okay, when Dan revived Megan, that was understandable

Howie reviving Laura is not

HOWIE OF COURSE SHE WOULD NEED THORAZINE YOU MORON

HOW DID YOU EVEN GRADUATE KINDERGARTEN YOU WALNUT

I do like Laura’s hair

oh god she’s barking I hate it

I was going to make my s/o watch this with me

fuck this movie so much

Cabrera is my fave character who isn’t Herbert

okay but is the research really illegal tho???

oh shit the warden got Herbert to move

DID THE WARDEN JUST HIT HERBERT

oh snap Herbert looks a little scared

KILL HIM HERBERT

WHY DON’T YOU WANT HIM TO KILL THE WARDEN HOWIE?

It’s party time!

frantic Herbert science is so good

howie, laura is not okay shut up

so she’s part warden now?

howie stop crying i hate you

don’t kiss her

‘his little pussycat’ what the fuck

okay cabrera i don’t like you anymore

Go on the run Herbert do it bae

ugh mamacita

that word never fails to irk me even when it’s not aimed at me

it almost makes me as angry as this fucking movie

i like that this movie went out of its way to get Herbert in his iconic outfit

three years in solitary???????

oh snap his sleeves are partly rolled up

hot damn

howie you moron don’t go in there

Herbert on the ground does things to me

rat warden is on the loose

the blond prisoner reminds me of that preacher dude from god’s not dead

david a.r white or w/e his name is

Moncho is alive i guess

poor moncho

why is Laura groping herself??

shit she killed them real good

her weird hand makes me want to watch idle hands

such a good movie

oh fuck the crackhead has the reagent

crackhead inmate looks like dollar store john lennon

oh snap the nurse is still here

please don’t kill/assault her 

SHE’S WEARING NOTHING BUT STOCKINGS AND UNDERWEAR UNDER HER NURSE COAT

WAS THE COSTUME PERSON FROM PORN

THAT IS THE ONLY EXPLANATION I HAVE FOR WHY SHE’S DRESSED LIKE THAT

Oh god he’s crying on her tits

is he going to bite them off

please don’t

oh god he’s suckling

i hate this movie

i hate this movie so much

HOWIE YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE GETTING INTO

DAN AT LEAST DIDN’T KNOW AT FIRST

YOU DID

Oh Herbert is making the same face he made when Dan asked him if he’s done it on people

oh god the bloody boob

at least she’s alive....

i hate this fucking movie

moses may be saved but i’m not bc this movie isn’t over

my head hurts

i want my mom and dad to make it better

okay the ‘head’ scene is the first movie was gross but compared to the nasty shit they do to the women in this movie it isn’t as...random?

like compared to what happens in this movie, it had a point. there was build-up

it’s still awful but compared to this, it isn’t

okay but laura biting off the warden’s dick is pretty cool

and the half man cabrera is pretty funny

Seeing Herbert beat people up is really hot

there, I said it

why are you booing me? I’m right

lasso yeet is funny

WHY IS LAURA WEARING FUCKING BORDERLINE BDSM LINGERIE 

this is so stupid

Herbert covered in blood is again, fucking hot

cabron is a word i’d use to describe whoever wrote this movie

ew john lennon is exploding or w/e

my head actually does hurt

I also want to hit Howie with a cane so I get u Laura

WHY ARE YOU KISSING HER YOU FUCKING IDIOT

DAMMITT HOWIE

I FUCKING MISS DAN CAIN SO MUCH 

i don’t care about laura kicking the shit out of howie

i want to see Herbert beating the shit out of people

also, he kinda made ‘ese’ sound hot

oh howie’s head is between Laura’s legs

it really is like he has his sister back

damn i want Herbert to punish me

yay the warden is dead

ew his dick

oh god howie just called laura ‘emily’

yes Herbert, yes, steal that idiot’s ID

oh shit Herbert is getting out

dubious, dubious, shut up moncho

so I guess howie is insane now

and he’s still calling her ‘emily’ 

stop saying my sister’s name

okay, Herbert putting on his glasses and walking away a free man...10/10 ending

hot damn, he is daddy af 

I love him so much

Final Thoughts: this movie is bad and should feel bad. When I said I wanted more Latino representation, this isn’t what I meant. The only redeeming feature is Herbert being daddy af/10. If someone could edit together only his scenes, that would be great. 

When you think of ‘the things I do for love’ think of me watching this movie out of love for Herbert West, not Game of Thrones

#beyond reanimator #beyond re-animator #re-animator #reanimator #this movie is so bad #and it should feel bad

[tymptir]

multimuse meme ¬ accepting @quccnnorth​ ♡ ❔ (sorry if i spam u w things i'm just obsessed w ur blog ok)

pfffffff, I love the spam, spam away I’m always here for spamming good god. alright, let’s see           who do I wanna throw at Sansa....

Gendry        obviously. I don’t have to tell you that and we’re already on it. Grenn         because Sansa obviously deserves the attention of adorable idiots and this one takes the cake on the idiot side. he’s also incredibly easy to get along with and has zero bad intentions whatsoever. Renly Baratheon         one of the few people who may have actually treated Sansa with kindness during her time in King’s Landing. also a gallant addition to her ever growing crush on Loras. who wouldn’t want two gay dudes doting on them? Maron Greyjoy         wait, what? yep. he, no doubt, won’t be Sansa’s favourite person in the world but he will most definitely come to Winterfell to collect his little brother’s dead body before those damned Starks can light him on fire. let’s see how that works out. Tyrion Lannister          no worries, never in any kind of shippy way. season 8 has given us the beginning of a brilliant dynamic between the two but very quickly turned that very weird and I’d love to avoid that. wouldn’t it be nice though, to have a proper reunion of two people who have suffered immensely under their time in King’s Landing and who, now, have come so very very far despite everyone telling them they could never achieve anything?

#quccnnorth #¬ic. [ answered ] #¬ooc. [ mun talk ] #(just wait for the day when I add Garlan and Olenna Tyrell). #(cos that's gonna happen at some point). #(ofc we don't HAVE to do any of this). #(it's just stuff I could see working out <3).

[kallypsowrites]

Braime moments 8x04

Alright, I’ve been waiting for what happened in this episode to happen since I was eighteen and watching season three for the first time. That’s six years my dudes. So I’m not going to let the tragic ending spoil it for me. We’re gonna talk about all the little Braime moments.

1. The drinking game

- Jaime was at Brienne’s side the whole damn time from the funeral to the party and onward. He’s practically glued to her. Even his solo scene with Tyrion involved him talking about Brienne

- The way he rests his hand over hers when she lays it over her cup, as if to encourage her to let loose and have fun. But also just...that hand touch. Mirrors that scene in season three when he keeps her from pulling a knife on Roose Bolton

- The smiles. FUCK the SMILES. They are just openly grinning at each other. No boundaries at all. They are happy to have survived. They are smiling and laughing and no longer guarded as they were for most of their relationship.

- Brienne has, in general, never been this happy or dorky. Every one of Brienne’s little looks and smiles when she’s drunk. Spectacular.

- Jaime clearly remembers like...everything Brienne has ever told him because he’s able to guess things so easily during the game. Also they’re still bantering “I told you that” “no you didn’t” “I DID”. So cute.

- When Tyrion makes the “you’re a virgin” statement and Brienne becomes guarded, Jaime tries to misdirect his brother because he knows that it’s going to be a rough subject for her. He’s got hella protective instincts.

- When Tormund comes up and starts talking and Jaime rolls his eyes. Bonus, Brienne continues to be very unenthused by Tormund.

- Tormund tries to follow Brienne when she is in a vulnerable place and Jaime puts himself physically in between them. Like...in a fight, Tormund could kick his ass, but he still goes ‘not today, my dude’. And that smile and shoulder pat. That’s the most passive aggressive ‘sit the fuck down’ I’ve ever seen.

- Tyrion pouring Tormund a drink with that sassy look like ‘nice try, but you aren’t gonna get in the way of MY new ship.

The SCENE

- Jaime followed Brienne right after she left, but he obviously doesn’t immediately knock, which leads me to believe the idiot was pacing the hall nervously, having no idea what the fuck he is doing.

- When Brienne opens the door, you see a moment of panic on both of their faces. Brienne “fuck he’s at my door” Tarth and Jaime “oh god, she actually opened the door” Lannister.

- Jaime’s absolutely disaster flirting. Trying to use the drinking game as an excuse. The fact that he’s clearly tipsy and nervous. Mumbling under his breath and stuff. He doesn’t even seem to know why he’s come there, but here he is.

- Brienne having no idea what to do with this situation, because man, she never thought they’d be at this point

- Jaime finding the room hot because he is genuinely nervous. Jerking off his jacket and throwing it to the side.

- Jaime kind of sarcastically complimenting her (reverting to their old dynamic) and Brienne not taking that crap with her ‘piss off’. And yet it’s so much less aggressive than their old dynamic because they do trust each other now.

- Jaime getting closer to her with ‘I hate the fucking north’ and Brienne standing her ground.

- Jaime’s “I don’t want things growing on me” even though we see, clearly, that Brienne is growing on Jaime.

- The fucking Jaime jealousy, oh my GOD. “Is Tormund Giantsbane growing on you” and Brienne giving him a look like ‘fucking seriously. Does it look like he’s growing on me?’

- “You sound quite jealous”--even as Brienne says it, you can see she is so confused by it because, holy shit, she’s never had anyone be jealous over HER before.

- Jaime realizing that yes, he does sound jealous and then immediately saying ‘god its hot in here’. He’s such a disaster. Completely incapable of seducing anyone. What a dork.

- Jaime struggling with his shirt and Brienne getting fed up and helping him. The surprised look Jaime gives her when she does. It’s so fucking vulnerable.

- He just instinctively starts undoing her shirt as well, but stops when she stops him. Excellent.

- “What are you doing?” “Taking off your shirt” --oh my god, you’re both such disasters at this. I love you.

- The fact that Brienne stops him and for a split second he wonders if she is going to reject him and he has a very worried look on his face. But then she starts undoing her own shirt and the look turns to ‘oh fuck, we’re doing this, aren’t we?’

- How she helps him out of his shirt and they just don’t say anything. I love how much they can communicate in silence.

- “I’ve never slept with a knight before”--Jaime, you’ve only ever been with your sister, but also, the fact that you call her a knight is just fucking adorable.

- “I’ve never slept with anyone before” --Brienne emphasizing that this is a very big deal for her. They’re both standing around slightly awkwardly because they really never thought they’d get to this point.

- The kiss itself. Oh boy, I gotta talk about the kiss. First of all, I LOVE that Jaime is the one who initiates it. I also love had goddamn hungry it is. Like this man has been holding himself back from this moment and suddenly, his resistance has snapped and he’s just going for it. There’s a desperation there that really speaks to what a long slow burn this has been between them. And the fact that Brienne just immediately starts kissing him back. And his hand on the side of her face. Ugh. It’s not perfect. It’s messy. But so is their relationship, I love this moment so much.

Afterwards

- Jaime looks conflicted after they have sex, but I mean, of course he does. He loves Brienne but this is the first time he’s ever loved anyone other than his sister. And this is the beginning of him doubting if he is worthy of her.

- The fact that Jaime was going to straight up stay in the north with Brienne. That was his plan. This wasn’t a ‘rebound and leave immediately’ thing. He really was intending to stay. He even said as much to Tyrion.

- Sansa defs knows that Jaime and Brienne are together lol

- His conversation with Tyrion and Tyrion is just so fucking happy for him. Like, Jaime is expecting some sort of snide comment but Tyrion is elated that he’s with someone who isn’t his sister. And he makes tall jokes.

- The fact that Jaime tells Tyrion to, essentially, fuck off when he tries to ask crude details, because he respects Brienne

- Ser Bronn approves of his ship being canon. Also say “it must be like looking in a mirror” which emphasizes that Jaime and Cersei might be twins, but Jaime and Brienne are soul twins with twin swords. Aaaaahhhh

The Scene of Heartbreak

- Alright, I want to pretend this didn’t happen, but I’m not yet losing hope based on my interpretation so here we go. UP UNTIL Jaime heard news about Cersei in the war (which was probably after a month in the north) he had no plans to go south and was content staying with Brienne. This is important to remember. He was never using her or trying to use her as a rebound.

- Jaime’s motivation for leaving is ambiguous, but it clearly tears him apart. Also, he and Brienne were staying in the SAME ROOM and SLEEPING TOGETHER for like a MONTH and who wants to write fanfic about that? Please and thank you.

- When Jaime is going, he tries not to even look at Brienne because he does not want to see the hurt on her face. He cares about hurting her.

- How Brienne grabs his face and forces him to look and how surprised and heartbroken he looks.

- He puts a hand on hers, clinging on for a moment, very tempted to stay.

- Brienne’s vulnerability. It shows how close they have grown and got Gwen’s acting just breaks my fucking heart. She deserves better than this.

- Jaime tells Brienne his sins. For one thing, I think he does this to make her not come after him so that she will stay safe. If Cersei finds out about Brienne, she will kill her. Better Brienne stay in the north. But also, he wants Brienne to realize that he is not worthy of her. That she can do better. That he’s not a good man and he doesn’t think he deserves happiness. He thinks his only chance at redemption is death.

- I think Jaime has one of two motivations. Either he sees that Cersei might very well win and he has to stop her, or he just knows that Brienne is better off without him and that he can’t escape his old life. Both are tragic but neither lessen his love for Brienne. I don’t think he has an ‘addiction to Cersei’. He’s just so used to feeling like trash ever since he became a King’s slayer. He doesn’t know how to leave that life.

Again, I fully think leaving Brienne sobbing was a dick move, but his motivation makes sense. We’ll have to wait to see what D&D do with his arc. Either it’s in character and he dies a hero or D&D are idiots and I ignore their writing decisions and pretend Jaime never left. Still, there were so many good moments this episode, and it would be a shame not to enjoy them because of this last scene.

#game of thrones #jaime lannister #brienne of tarth #braime #jaime x brienne #brienne x jaime #got spoilers

[bonesgadh]

How my mom™️ reacted to every Gendrya scene from seasons 1, 2 and 3.

As requested by @stuffjusthappensworld.

Season 1

1x10

Arya meets Gendry after he defends her from hot pie.

My mom: poor Arya all alone and confused, she must be so scared. Yeah she is not going down without a fight, defend yourself and let them know you are a badass. Wait, isn’t that the King’s bastard Ned met a couple of episodes ago? They are going to travel together? No shit! I ship them, I’ve only seen them interact for 20 seconds but I saw a spark. That means he’ll probably die soon, my ships are cursed.

Season 2

2x01

That little glimpse of Gendry helping Arya getting on the wagon.

My mom: yeah, I definitely ship them.

2x02

The gold cloaks ask Yoren to give Gendry to them.

My mom: damn, so both of them are fugitives? That’s good because that way they’ll look after each other. Arya definitely needs someone she can trust.

The river scene.

(You don’t have to be a knight to buy armor, any idiot can buy armor.

How do you know?

Because I sold armor!)

My mom: aww, look at that little smile. They both know they are smarter than the rest of their companions.

(Asking me questions is bad luck, you’ll be dead soon.)

My mom: uh, I don’t think so. My guess is you are the one who’ll be dead soon.

(Did you kill someone or is it because you are a girl?)

My mom: yeah, of course he realized she is a girl. He is too smart and besides Arya is way too pretty to be a boy. And Gendry is pretty too but that’s another issue.

(Lommy and hot pie can’t know. No one can know.

They won’t, not from me.)

My mom: oh shit she is going to tell him who she is? She must trust him a lot. He won’t tell obviously but it’s risky more that one person knows her secret.

(My name’s not Arry, it’s Arya of House Stark. Yoren is taking me home to Winterfell.)

My mom: okay but she didn’t have to tell him the truth only because he discovered she is a girl. She could’ve pretended to be someone else but she told him the truth. This is fascinating.

(All that about cocks—I shouldn’t have said. And I’ve been pissing in front of you and everything!)

My mom: lol he is panicking! This is the start of something beautiful, I’m telling you. They will tell this story to their grandkids someday.

(I should be calling you ‘milady’.

Do not call me ‘milady’!

As milady commands.)

My mom: you know how couples call each other ‘sweetie’ or ‘sweetheart’? Yeah he’s totally going to call her ‘milady’.

Arya pushes him to the ground and he laughs.

My mom: *heart eyes*

2x03

Arya talks to Yoren as she cleans Needle.

My mom: love that shot of Arya because you can clearly see Gendry sleeping in the background. Coincidence? I think not.

Yoren gets shot with the crossbow.

My mom: that’s right Gendry, you protect my girl.

(You want Gendry?)

My mom: the fuck Arya what are you doing? Noooo.

(There you got him. He always loved that helmet.)

My mom: omg she is so smart!!!! She saved him, I love that.

2x04

Every scene of them in Harrenhall and watching how the Lannister soldiers torture the prisoners.

My mom: You notice how how they are always side by side? They look great together.

The scene where is seems as if the soldiers will torture Gendry to death.

My mom: no no no Gendry you can’t leave Arya alone! Oh thank god for papa Lannister.

2x05

Arya watches Gendry “practice” with the sword.

My mom: omg she totally checked him out. And not just once but like four-five times! Clever girl. Honestly Arya just shamelessly staring at Gendry’s body added years to my life. And that cute little smile good jesus.

2x08

Arya finds Gendry and hot pie and asks them if they have seen Jaqen.

My mom: well finally, there’s my boy again. Missed him last episode. 

Arya, Gendry and hot pie prepare to escape at midnight.

My mom: haha, they both shut him up. He’s a bit exasperating but I like him. Yes, they are out!!!! Go find your mother and your brother my girl, and introduce them to your new boyfriend.

Season 3

3x02

(I’m just trying to understand.

Would you please shut up about it?

Jaqen H’ghar offered you three kills.

I’m not listening.

But just explain it to me. He offered to kill any three people you wanted. Dead. All you had to do was give him the names. Anyone. You could’ve picked King Joffrey!

Shut up. 

You could’ve picked Tywin Lannister. 

Jaqen got us out of Harrenhal, why are you complaining?

You could’ve ended the war.)

My mom: I kinda get his point but dude, she saved your ass! I hope they run into Robb and Cat first because the north is not really an option for the Starks anymore, is it? I mean, Winterfell is all destroyed and there’s no one there to protect them. Their bickering is adorable by the way.

They run into the brotherhood.

My mom: oh jesus, who are those? Arya and Gendry keep jumping from one captive to the other, don’t they? Lol Gendry put that sword down, five episodes ago you showed us you can’t wield one for shit. Seriously, put it down before you hurt yourself.

Scene at the tavern.

(Gendry is a smith. He was an apprentice at the armory.

A smith, eh? Where did you train?)

My mom: adfñskjl that look they gave each other! 

Enter the Hound.

My mom: omg he is going to recognize her! Shit, they are in trouble now.

3x03

Scene outside of the crossroads inn.

My mom: okay I don’t like this. I get Gendry is helping the tipsy guy only to stay out of trouble but they gave a lot of emphasis on they guy being interested in Gendry being a smith. He is not going to stay with them, is he? Oh no, the squad is separating!  Awww he made her a wolf-shaped bread. Arya and Gendry want to laugh so hard lol. This is such a cute scene but also sad. I’m going to miss hot pie, he was an idiot but he was Arya’s friend. Now Gendry is all she has left. 

3x04

Scene in the cave where the brotherhood hides.

My mom: I just love how they always put them side by side. Yeah you bet one-eyed guy, Arya is the bravest of you all.

3x05

The Hound kills Beric.

My mom: shit he killed the cool guy. It was kind of obvious he would but it still sucks. Oh jesus Arya what are you doing? Yeah Gendry, stop her from doing something stupid. Adsklafjñfaslkj am I an idiot if that shot of he holding her is making he happy? OMFG HE BROUGHT HIM BACK?? WHAT KIND OF SORCERY IS THIS??

Gendry tells Arya he’ll stay with the brotherhood.

My mom: oh great, I knew he was going to stay with them. This is just fucking great. Yeah Arya has every right to be pissed. After everything they’ve been through he’ll just leave her? Can’t he see he is the only thing she has now?  Loosing him will destroy her.

(I never had a family.)

My mom: omg please don’t say it, Arya.

(I can be your family.)

My mom: that’s the 13-year old equivalent of an adult saying ‘I love you’. Good lord take me now, I don’t think I can watch him reject her. She is on the verge of tears, she is staring at him with so much love and she pretty much begged him to go with her. 

(You wouldn’t be my family, you’d be milady.)

My mom:  This is just heartbreaking, you can see the exact moment her heart shatters into a million pieces. She looks so hurt at what he said and he looks hurt as well, he is on the verge of tears too. 

3x06

Melisandre and the soldiers take Gendry away.

My mom: what the FUCK???? God please no someone stop them. Arya trying to get the soldiers to release Gendry is so cute. Yeah Arya, kick her ass. It’s kind of adorable how concerned she is the witch will hurt him. Hey don’t touch her with your dirty hands. Seriously, a stupid prophecy?? This is not the time for this shit. Noooooo don’t take him away! Sweet jesus look at Arya’s face, she is devastated! She is going full-dark Arya after this, isn’t she? They have taken everything away from her now. Please tell me they’ll see each other again because if they don’t I swear to god...

THE END.

Bonus: 

3x07

Arya with the brotherhood after Melisandre took Gendry away.

My mom: aww my poor baby, she is so sad because Gendry is gone. She must feel so alone. Yeah get the fuck out of there, they only care about fighting the bad guys and gold. Oh dear now what? The Hound, are you kidding me??? Told you, from one captive to another. Here here we go again.

You can read her reactions to Gendrya scenes from season 8 here:

Part one

Part two

Part three

#watching their scenes together after what happened in season 8 was very painful #but they were always so damn charming #you could see they had something very special going on #and despite all the fuckery we were very blessed in season 8 #gendrya