He doesn’t feel right. He shouldn’t be doing this.
Kiyoomi isn’t exactly the best with the relationship thing; be it friends, or family, or intimate, he’s left a lot of that to Motoya- the “nice” one.
It never really bothered him that Motoya was considered ‘nicer’ than him, Kiyoomi knew his heart’s reasonings for picking and choosing who and what to have empathy and respect for; just because Komori had less of a sense for it, doesn’t mean he’s ‘nicer.’
And then you crashed into Sakusa Kiyoomi’s life.
With no remorse or sympathy, you strut your way into Kiyoomi’s life like you owned the rental space in his heart and mind, like you were meant to be there all along, and despite never, ever having been in genuine love before, your presence felt natural to the unnatural and unpredictable world.
And he feels absolutely terrible he probably demolished that.
More so because you deserve better; he doesn’t feel sorry for himself that he probably lost the best thing that ever happened to him. You don’t deserve his malice, and tonight, that’s all he subjected you to.
So, against all his logic and his mind begging him to stay and let you have your space, his heart refuses. It yearns for you, it craves you, wants to know you’re okay and that he supports you if you’ve fallen out of love with him.
Because sure, kiyoomi hates sleeping on couches. But he hates sleeping without you more.
Shambling into the living room- only stubbing his toe once or twice, impressive even to him- he manages to make his way to your quivering frame, and he swallows thickly at the distraught mess he’s made you.
“Hey,” kiyoomi sighs, watching with a wince as you scrub your eyes. They’re so swollen, and they leave tears along your fingers, but he says nothing about it, not wanting you to feel worse.
“I’m sorry!” You choke. “Did I wake you? I should’ve been quiet. You need your sleep, you have to-“
“Stop,” he croaks, the lump in his throat bubbling up. “Don’t apologize.” He’s the one that kicked you out of your own bedroom, and you’re standing there, apologizing to him?
He’s amazed you haven’t left him yet.
If he were you, he would’ve. This would be the final straw, the end all of your relationship. He’d pack up all his shit, throw it in a suitcase and absolutely book it out of the house. He’d slash a hole in three of your tires, because all four means you don’t have to pay for them, so three is for the best revenge, and he’d go fuck your cousin who’s so much nicer than you could ever be, and-
“Kiyoomi?”
“Three,” he says suddenly, cheeks flushing hot when he realizes you have no clue what he’s talking about. He clears his throat and scrubs his face with his large hands. “I’m… I wanted to come and apologize.”
Immediately, your heaving sobs come to an end, tears dribbling down your face and falling from your chin once they gain enough weight and momentum. He gives you a shaky sigh, “I never…” he forces the lump down his throat as best as he can, “I never should’ve snapped at you like that, or kept you away from your own bed; you… you’ve never done that to me, even if I’ve deserved it.”
You still say nothing, eyes glimmering up at him in bewilderment. He should shut up, he knows, but he wants to put all the cards down because you don’t have to forgive him- you deserve to have whatever closure you need to take.
Even if that is slashing three of his tires.
“You don’t have to justify me being malicious,” he continues with a shaky sigh. “I’ve had people my whole life do that, and I’ve let them. You don’t have to- I never should’ve turned you away like that.”
“So you’ve said,” you croak. Your head turns to avoid his gaze, and after a few moments, your shoulders start to heave again. “It…” you snarl softly, “it was never about the bed, Kiyoomi. You sent me away… did I really make you that mad?”
“No,” he says, crouching down to make himself smaller, more approachable than his usual 190.5 centimeter frame. “That’s on me, baby. That has nothing to do with you. I’m the one who betrayed that trust and blew everything far out of proportion.” His head ducks to try and meet your gaze, mumbling a soft ‘can I touch you?’ and he’s unsurprised when you shake your head ‘no.’
You do, however, turn to look at him, and it makes his heart pound even more than it already was- a task he thought was impossible, but here you were, proving that theory wrong.
“I didn’t do anything to you,” you whimper. He nods, looking down shamefully. Your breathing is ragged, “you’re the one who threw me aside. I tried, Kiyoomi, I tried to apologize and make you forgive me, and you rejected it.” Once again, he says nothing. “You’ve never been so mad where you… where you didn’t w-want me.”
He disobeys your wishes and places a loving hand on your knee, shaking his head. “Don’t be like that.” He blinks his own line of tears down, and even if he doesn’t deserve a lick of your kindness, you reach out to wipe it away. “Stop blaming yourself for the shit I’ve done; it was selfish, and I didn’t think about you, or us, and I was an idiot.”
He squeezes your knee, “but I always will want you. Even if I didn’t show it tonight.” Your hand trembles against his soft cheek, thumb grazing along the stubble that grows. You look him up and down, almost processing his apology and deciphering if it’s good enough.
“You fucked up,” you say finally. Despite himself, he gives you a soft chuckle.
“I know.”
“Don’t be this person, Kiyoomi,” you say, a pleading lilt to your voice. “I don’t want to play these games with you. We’re adults. You can’t shut me out because you get mad at me.”
“I know,” he says quietly. Then, he stands up, “I understand if… if you still want to be alone. I just wanted to you know that no matter what I say or do, I love you. And I appreciate you for always being here.”
Always here. Always watching him. Always loving him.
“I want to come to bed.”
His ears perk up at your sudden, soft words, and he gives you a small smile and a nod, his hand extending out to gently take yours if you’ll let him. A chill runs through him when you indeed lace your fingers in his, pulling yourself up to walk your exhausted frames to the bedroom. He feels your face nuzzle into the muscle of his bicep, and he casts you a puzzled look.
“It’s going to take some time to trust you again,” you mumble softly, squeezing the muscles in his arm as if to plead him to not go away or chastise your ‘demands.’
Hardly demands, but he understands your hesitation.
“Yeah?” He hums, planting a kiss to your head. To make you laugh for the first time in hours, he gently tugs you closer to him and leans his entire weight on you, quickly swaying you both to flop onto the bed; this does have you giggling, pitching when the mattress squeals under the weight of both of you. He kisses your head once more, then moving his kiss to your lips, sighing when you reciprocate the affection back.
“The rest of your life sound okay?”
————
this is the ending I chose, if you don’t like it, I don’t know what to tell you 🥲🫡 but a part two wouldn’t have been possible without your encouragement and support, and I’m forever thankful for the encouragement from everyone who took the time to either want to be tagged, or read the piece whenever they get the chance.
Mwah 💋
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My current favourite crackship that I just created myself is Hiyori×Alive!Kuina. Just because if she can't get Zoro she'll just go for his cousin instead.
You're a genius. Your brain is huge. Please, let me kiss your brain. This is just amazing. I love lesbians. You're SO real-
Hiyori is easily one of my favorite characters and I love her SO much and people won't stop reducing her to her ship with Zoro. I think she doesn't need anybody and if she did want somebody it should be a girl. Because I say so. And Kuina is just,,, She would've been such a great character. Can't stop thinking about this fanart I found because it has changed my life for the better. She's in Wano to train to become the world's greatest swordsman and I'm just thinking about what if Kuina had been there to help them out too and she had been the one to save Hiyori all those times instead of Zoro.... Thinking thoughts. Like, of course, Hiyori and Zoro also have their moments because I do actually like their dynamic and I think she admires him a lot!! But you know. Kuina saves Hiyori a couple of times (when Zoro was going to do it, actually, she just appears like a second before him and ruins his moment) and Hiyori just melts. Because who wouldn't? Kuina would be so tall and strong and a sizeable woman, and I would personally die if she helped me save my country. Besides, I think they'd understand each other because both are women that have been reduced to that role specifically instead of their ambitions and their power and they're so much more. Hiyori was helpless when she had to see her country turn into this mess and she couldn't so anything else but to pretend,, Like-- If somebody knows how being a woman in the world works is Hiyori, and Kuina would understand. She'd admire Kuina so much for her abilities and her personality and ambitions!!!!!! And Kuina would absolutely love Hiyori's kindness and strength for being able to put up with so much!!!
Not to mention that Kuina would be taller than her,,, And bigger,,, And Hiyori would have to look up,, And this is now just the aesthetic part but God they'd look so different. That's Hiyori's guard dog. Wouldn't it be funny if Kuina were all serious and teasing with Zoro and like "*raises eyebrow* seriously?" type of masc girl, and the second Hiyori is around she turns into the happiest person in the world and extremely protective of her? Zoro judges her but he can't say shit because he's literally the same with Luffy (and Kuina teases him even more because she always has the upper hand and it makes him so angry). They're both down bad. Hiyori is just so nice to her and keeps saying she trusts her to become the world's greatest swordsman but even if she doesn't, she'll always have her heart and a place to stay in Wano. And I am weak, guys, I am so weak for lesbians.
Aghhh this is SO good. Somebody make them kiss. I- This is great. Oda could just say "ah yes Kuina actually escaped her hometown on her own and faked her death and traveled to Wano" and I'd believe him wholeheartedly because I want her back. I also want Hiyori back. I miss Wano sometimes a lot.
Also, Kuina sees Zoro with Enma and she goes:
Kuina: Oh cool, you got Hiyori's sword. Good luck with that one.
Zoro: Do you want it or what? I am not giving it to you. You'll have to fight for it.
Kuina: Nah, when I win our fight I want to win against the king of hell. Nothing less.
Zoro: Where's the 'I can't win I'm a girl' bullshit now?
Kuina: Stayed with the girl. Now I am a woman and I am going to beat your ass.
And Hiyori looking at them having the biggest lesbian moment in the world kicking her feet and blushing and Momo is next to her like "hehe you have a crush-" and he doesn't get to finish what he was saying because Hiyori hits him so fucking hard he faints. Don't tease her. Poor girl. She's in love, leave her alone.
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