#girl who constantly has things just happen to her

[muffinpink02]

Lucy and Ona 🥰 the Lucy padel vid got me feeling things and the big O made me desperate for more jealous Ona

So maybe Lucy takes up padel, has a hot instructor who clearly fancies her, Ona happens to be watching her once and overt jealousy ensues. And smut obv, always smut

Feel free to not do that if it’s a terrible idea 😂 I don’t have the most creative of minds, I won’t be offended 😶‍🌫️

Many Shades Of Green

Anon request - Thank you beautiful anon! Loved this idea! I haven't really read it through so you may see changes if you ever come back for seconds. Dom Ona

Warnings - smut 18 public sex,

And @lucyandalexiafan thank you ALWAYS for reading my several pages off notes and always being there for the fics chats and the deep chats. My tumblr bestie, I appreciate you a whole lot ❤️

“You sure you don't want to try it out? It's really fun” Lucy asked her girlfriend.

“No, it's okay. I’ll be happy reading and watching.” Ona smiled playfully.

Lucy chuckled shyly as she looked at her paddle. 

The girls were waiting for Lucy’s paddle board trainer. She had been interested in the Paddle sport for some time now, but hadn't had a chance to get into the activity with her schedule being so tight. But finally with a rare day of freedom she finally got round to booking a trainer of the sport. 

“I wonder where she is? Oh that might be her.” 

Ona looked up to see a tall blonde woman approaching them at the side of the court. It was like she was walking in slow motion, the girl had legs for days. She had bright blue eyes and a Hollywood smile, she looked more like a model than a trainer. 

“Hey you must be Lucy? I’m Katie.” The blonde put her hand out for Lucy, her bright smile almost blinding.

Ona didn’t miss the way the blonde eyed up Lucy’s body. 

Lucy smiled politely and took Katie’s hand. “Hey Katie, nice to meet you. This is my partner, Ona.”

The vogue looking model then eyed up Ona, a small smirk crept on her face. 

“Gosh, you’re so little, I almost didn’t see you down there.” She laughed.

Ona had to laugh it off, it wasn’t the first time someone had mentioned her height and it wouldn’t be the last. But it still annoyed her. 

“Ha, yeah, luckily I won't be in your way. I’m just watching.” Ona rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. 

Lucy gave Ona a small smile, the younger brunette knew Lucy loved her height, she constantly told her how cute she was, or how she fit into the crock of her neck perfectly when they cuddled. But it didn't make her any less self conscious when someone mentioned it in such a way, especially if that someone looked like a catwalk model.

Katie gave Ona a fake smile, but didn’t reply, she turned to Lucy with her bright smile back on her pretty face. 

“Anyways, shall we get started, Luce?” 

Ona raised her eyebrows at the blatant rudeness of the blonde and the new nickname for her girlfriend. 

“Ahh yeah sure.” Lucy smiled back at Ona as she walked with the blonde to the centre of the court. Ona rolled her eyes as she took a seat in the stands. She pulled out her book and began to read. 

The Spaniard was close enough to hear their conversation, so she didn’t miss the obnoxious laugh Katie gave everytime Lucy said something. Ona loved Lucy, but she wasn’t that funny. She shook her head and tried her best to get into her book, but she couldn't keep her eyes from wandering up to the pair in front.

Katie was showing Lucy how to swing her paddle, she stood next to the brunette and grabbed her arm. 

“Wow, you’ve got some power in those arms, I bet you could lift me without blinking.” Katie chuckled, her hand still on Lucy’s biceps, squeezing her muscles.

Lucy laughed politely. Ona knew Lucy wouldn't know what to do in a situation like this, she got it all the time. So much so that she didn't even notice the difference when someone was flirting or just being polite with her. 

“Let me just get behind you and show you the right form.” Katie said.

“Ahh, okay yeah.” 

Ona watched as the blonde put her hands on Lucy's waist, moving her into position, she tried to not let it get to her, it was sports after all, her trainers had done similar things and she knew there was nothing behind it. But Katie had been flirting with Lucy since her foot touched the court.

“Okay, that's great. Put your back out a bit more. Yeah,that's it, now stick out your bum. Perfect, that's nice.” 

Ona watched as Katie shamelessly checked out Lucy's arse. The Spaniard could feel her jealousy starting to creep up, but she tried her best to ignore it. 

Katie stepped a little closer, pushing herself against Lucy's arse.

That's when Ona lost all interest in her book,

“Okay now back up with me, I won't let you fall.” 

Lucy was completely oblivious to Katie's gross tactics. When it came to any kind of sport Lucy had her head game on, she had been looking forward to the training for some time, so she was locked into concentrating on her instructions, not realising what Katie was doing.

“Beautiful. Just like that.” Katie bit her lip as she felt Lucy press into her. Ona watched as she placed her hand on Lucy's back and pushed her slightly forward. “Perfect, good.”

Ona couldn't ignore the angry heat that crept up her spine, she was pissed. Ona’s teeth gritted so hard she was close to breaking a tooth. She wasn't a violent person, or even an angry person but she was close to dashing her book in Katie's pretty face. 

“Okay, good. Let me just show you how I position myself. So you can try that way.” 

“Okay.” Lucy nodded.

Katie stood in front of Lucy. “Now just watch how I bend.” 

Ona watched as the blonde bent over in front of Lucy, her mini skirt was sitting just below her arse cheeks, but she bent so far forward you could practically see the outline of her lips in her underwear. Ona couldn't believe the way this girl was throwing herself at Lucy, It was completely over the top. 

The girl was clearly into Lucy, and my god, she was trying her hardest to get some kind of attention. Ona couldn't help but laugh at how tacky she was. 

“See how my knees bend?”

Lucy was trying her best to not look at the girls in front of her. She looked over at Ona to see if she was doing okay, but that's when she saw the anger flash across Ona’s normally gentle face. Lucy looked at her, trying to mouth ‘what's wrong’ but before Ona could respond Katie was there, again.

“See what I mean, Luce?”

Lucy looked back at Katie. “Oh yeah, yeah I see.”

Katie stood up and faced the brunette again. “Great, I know not everyone can bend as much as that. You have to be flexible.” She took a step closer to Lucy and whispered “I do a downward dog every morning and every night.” She purred as she winked at the brunette.

“O-Oh yeah, good to keep the muscles going.” Lucy awkwardly rubbed her nose. 

“You would know, I bet you’re always at the gym.”

“Yeah, part of the job.” Lucy awkwardly played with her paddle. 

“Yoga is really good for the body. I do private classes, if you were ever interested. Just one on one. It really helps in the bedroom, I can be put in so many positions.” She smirked at Lucy. 

“Ah y-yeah. I’ll let you know.” Lucy stuttered, she was slowly starting to catch on to why Ona had a face of thunder.

“Great, I’ll keep you to that promise. Let's play a round, I wanna see your form.” 

The girls played 3 rounds. Katie had actually kept the flirting down a minimum, aside from taking off her t-shirt as she was ‘So hot’ and was now in a tight sports bra that held little to the imagination. But Ona was still pissed. She had heard the majority of their conversation and wanted nothing more than to drag Katie by the hair and stick her paddle where the sun didn't shine.

 As I said before, Ona wasn't an angry person, or a violent person, she was normally calm, cool and collected. But now and again Ona could maybe, sometimes be a little jealous. 

Yes, it might have bugged her when the barista girl gave Lucy doe eyes every time they got coffee. And yes of course it annoyed her when girls would throw themselves at Lucy when they were out at a bar or restaurant. But, Ona was only human, of course she would get annoyed when someone flirted with the taller brunette, Lucy was hers, for as long as Lucy wanted to be of course.

And someone as shameless as Katie always brought out the little green jealous Ona. 

Finally, the game was done.

“Okay, let's leave it there. Good job, Luce.” Katie patted the brunette on the back.

“Yeah, it was good, it's a lot of fun.” Lucy smiled.

Katies blue eyes roamed over Lucy's body. “Let me help you stretch, your thighs will be tight.”

“That's okay, I can help her with that.” Ona was suddenly standing by the fence.

Lucy and Katie both jumped at Ona’s sudden appearance. 

Katie gave Ona a particularly bitchy look, clearly annoyed to have been caught out. She gave Ona another fake smile. “I think I might know how to work her muscles a bit better than you, it's my job.”

“I think I might know a little bit, I am a professional athlete. Also I think I know Lucy's body a lot better than you.” Ona gave her own fake smile.

“Of course.” Katie snarled. She turned back to Lucy who hadn't missed the blatant passiveness going on between the girls. The blonde put her winning smile back on.

“You have my email. Let me know when you can do another session next week, and that yoga class.” Katie smirked.

“Yeah, I’ll let you know. Thanks again.” Lucy waved.

Katie watched Lucy walk away, her blue eyes locked with Ona’s brown ones. She gave the younger brunette a wicked smile and walked off the court. 

“Hey, you ready? How was your book?” Lucy asked.

Ona hadn't read one single sentence of her book, but Lucy didn't need to know that.

“Good, but I was a bit distracted.” Ona gave Lucy a tight smile. 

Lucy knew that tone, she knew that smile, she had seen it plenty of times before, it was no secret Ona was a jealous person. It was never a problem, it didn't cause Lucy any stress. It was never serious enough for her to find it uncomfortable or controlling, it was just a trait that Ona had. Lucy saw it every now and then, she couldn't help but find it cute, and even made her feel special. 

Being seen as the more dominant one in the relationship Lucy sometimes felt like she couldn't be in that position where her partner was the more jealous one but with Ona she always made her feel wanted and?

“Can we go to the showers? I wanna wash and get out of these clothes.” 

Lucy grabbed her shirt, dabbing the sweat that dripped down her face, flashing her hardened abs that flexed from her breathing. 

The Spaniard had seen Lucy’s abs more times then she’d had hot meals, but no matter how many times she had her eyes, hands, mouth or other regions of her body on those muscles, they always managed to leave her speechless.

“Y-yeah.” Ona cleared her throat. 

They headed towards the showers, Lucy spoke about their plans later but it fell on deaf ears, Ona wasnt really listening. She was thinking about all the ways she would fuck Lucy when they got home. The younger brunette couldn't stop the hot desire she had bubbling up in her stomach, her jealousy had sparked a mix between anger and pure want for her girlfriend. 

They made it to the showers. 

“I won't be long.” Lucy kissed Ona’s cheek.

“Okay. I’ll wait here.” Ona smiled as she sat round the corner.

The older brunette made her way into the shower room, she entered the cubicle and began to wash her sweaty body. Little did she know Ona was sat outside, thinking about what strap to use on the girl, but her thoughts were interrupted by that irritating laugh she heard earlier.

“Yeah, I just finished my session with her. She’s so sexy! She definitely wanted me, if it wasn't for her pixie girlfriend being there she would have definitely given her number to me.” Katie spoke obnoxiously on her phone. “Yeah, I’m going to shower now. I'll talk to you later.” 

Katie couldn't see Ona sitting behind the corner but Ona had heard enough to know exactly who she was talking about, she heard the door to the showers open as Katie walked inside.

That's when something snapped inside Ona. The calm, cool and collected side of her had all but disappeared and was replaced by a red hot anger that erupted inside of her body. She had done her best at holding it in, but Katie had pushed her a step too far, she couldn't hold it in any longer and that green little monster had finally come out to play. She gripped the arm chair as she waited a couple of seconds before following Katie.

Ona entered the hot shower room, she just caught the back of Katies head entering a cubicle. Then she noticed Lucy's unmistakable Barcelona towel, hanging over a door. 

She knocked on her girlfriend's cubicle door. “Lucy.” 

Lucy heard Ona’s voice, she unlocked the door to see if the younger brunette was okay.

“Hey, wha-” To Lucy's surprise the door was pushed open by the short Spainiard. 

Ona roamed her hungry eyes over Lucys naked wet body, she looked so fucking good. The Spaniard smirked dangerously at her girlfriend, loving the confusion on Lucy’s face. She stripped her clothes off with speed she didn't know she had. Throwing the clothing on the dry bench next to Lucy's own clothes.

The shorter girl wasted no time as she pushed Lucy's naked body hard against the cubicle. The taller brunette let out a grunt as her back hit the wall.

“Ona, whats wro-” Lucy’s words were cut off by Ona’s mouth suddenly on hers.

She didnt have time to explain to Lucy that she wanted to fuck her exactly where she stood, or that Katie had created a angry, jealous, horny side of her.

Ona’s kisses were deep and rough, Lucy easily melted into her touch. She was slightly confused about the sudden intrusion but when Ona kissed her like this she didn't really see a need to stop and ask questions. 

Ona forcefully pushed her tongue into Lucy's mouth, causing the taller girl to let out a surprised squeak as Ona sucked hard on her tongue. The Spaniard's hands glided up the girl's neck, allowing her short nails to scratch her skin, Lucy hissed at the slight pain but it was silenced with Ona’s hungry lips, Lucy couldn't ignore the arousal that came with the sting on her skin.

Her fingers entangled in the older brunette's wet hair, just before she gripped onto the back of Lucy's neck, pulling her closer to her face, making the taller girl bend. She was controlling every move of their kiss, every break for air, every angle was controlled by Ona.

She moved her hot mouth along Lucy's jaw, taking small bites after each kiss. Lucy's hands gripped Ona’s hips as she brought her closer to her wet body, she could already feel her core wanting to be touched.  

Ona lips reached Lucy's neck, she could taste the salty sweat that Lucy hadn’t washed yet. She couldn't get enough of the flavour, she wanted more. She greedily traced the whole length of her tongue over her wet salty skin, wanting to taste every part of her. She felt an almost animistic side of her kick in, she wanted to make sure everyone knew Lucy was hers, especially Katie. 

Ona moved her thigh in between Lucy's legs, she pushed herself hard against the taller girl's body, pinning her to do the wall. She was never normally so rough, she could be dominant now and again but that jealous flame in her only grew the more she heard Lucy’s sweet moans. 

Lucy's hips moved desperately along Ona’s thigh, but the shorter girl didn't allow her the friction she needed, she moved her leg ever so slightly away, not giving Lucy and her throbbing clit what she wanted. 

Ona couldn't stop herself as she sunk her teeth into Lucys wet skin. Lucy winced as she let out a shaky breath from the sharp pain. Ona wanted to mark her girlfriend’s body, she wanted to make Lucy and anyone who was in touching distance know she was hers. 

The shorter girl hungrily moved her mouth down to Lucy's chest, kissing Lucy’s tight nipple. She gently bit at the bud, capturing it between her teeth as her tongue flicked hard against her flesh. Lucy’s hands tightneed around Ona’s hips, causing the girl's mouth to clamp down around her skin. She couldn't help the smile when she heard Lucy whimper above her, she could tell she was trying to be quiet, but that wasn't part of her plan.

“Onaaa.” She husked.

Ona gave a particularly hard suck before she moved her mouth away. She began to kiss down Lucy's abdomen, biting and sucking at the beautiful abs. She lowered herself to her knees in front of Lucy. 

Lucy couldn't hold the groan in when Ona kneeled in front of her. Her beautiful girlfriend looked up at the Northerner, her brown doe eyes were full of desire but also a hint of anger, that Lucy didn’t miss. Ona kissed Lucy's stomach with a hunger that made Lucy's knees weak, she could feel her clit throbbing as she watched Ona move lower to her already wet cunt.

She laced her fingers in Ona’s hair, urging her to move to the spot she needed her most, but Ona grabbed her hands and pinned them to the wall. 

“No touching.”

“Ona, baby please.”

Ona loved feeling Lucy’s hands in her hair in any state, but right now she wanted to be the one in charge, she wanted to have full control of this situation, even if Lucy's begging made her want to give her everything she wanted.

“Are you desperate Luce?” 

Lucy looked down at the girl on her knees, she could feel Ona’s breath on her, her insides melted at the site. Ona’s hooded eyes were looking at her with so much lust, it made her throat dry.

She nodded. “Yeah.” She whispered.

“Louder, I can't hear you.” Ona gently bit Lucy's thigh.

The older brunette bit her lip, she wanted to scream.

“I’m desperate Ona, please.” She picked her voice up a little but not enough.

“More.” Ona giggled, she knew Lucy was holding back, it made sense, they were in a public space but she didn't care, she wanted someone in particular to hear exactly what she was about to do to her girlfriend.

She clearly needed a little push, Ona dragged her tongue along Lucy's thigh, stopping at the crease, between her thigh and lips, kissing her lightly. Lucy squeezed her eyes shut, as she felt Ona tease her. 

“Ona. Please.” 

“You’re mine aren't you Lucy? Hmm?”

“Yes. All you-, aah fuck!”

Ona swiped her tongue through Lucy's throbbing folds.

“Say it again. Louder.” She kissed Lucy's wet lips, tasting her girlfriend's familiar taste.

“I’m all yours On-aaa! Yes, please don't stop.” Lucy half shouted. 

Lucy’s head hit the cubicle wall as the girl on her knees began to eat her out. She knew Ona was pissed off with Katies constant flirting, but she didn't realise just how pissed she was. Ona wasn't slow, she wanted to make Lucy scream. She picked up her tongue with a fast pace, hitting Lucy's swollen clit. She hadn't seen this kind of side to her before, this possessive side, but fuck, she couldn't get enough of it. 

“Fuck, Ona.” Lucy whispered. 

Ona wasn't having that.

The Spaniard moved her mouth from Lucy's core. “Sorry, I didn't hear you?” She looked up, her lips already wet with Lucy.

“I….fuck, Ona please, please. I need your mouth. Please!” The girl moaned, loudly.

Bingo. 

That's exactly what Ona wanted to hear. She couldn't stop the devilish smirk that pulled at her lips, she knew Katie would have heard Lucy, and whoever else was in the room.

“You need my mouth?” She kissed her sensitive lips. “Why Lucy?”

Lucy's hands flexed under Ona own, still pinned to the wall. Her head was dizzy. 

“Becu- ahh. Because you make me feel good” Lucy pleaded.

“How good?”

“So fucking good. Your mouth was made for me, Ona.” Lucy's hips rolled, trying to get across how much she wanted her. “I love you, and your perfect mouth.” Her words were softer this time.

“I love you too.” Ona husked.

The younger girl ducked her head back between Lucy's legs picking her pace back up, tracing her talented tongue all over Lucy's sensitive flesh. Lucy let out a loud groan, finally feeling Ona’s mouth work on her properly. She wanted so badly to entangle her fingers into Ona’s hair, so scared that she would move away again.

Lucy’s not so soft whimpers were loud enough to hear two doors down, Katie could hear every moan, groan, whimper and even the wet sucking from Ona’s wet lips. She huffed as she washed her desperate sweat away.

The younger girl worked her mouth on her girlfriend, her own cunt throbbing at the noises Lucy was making. The older brunette had clearly forgotten her worries of being loud, she was completely lost in the feeling of Ona, pleasuring her with so much desire.

She began to move her hips, gently into Onas face, her clit felt so good finally being sucked the way she loved, between Ona’s perfect lips. 

“Please Ona, I want to touch you.”

Ona pulled back, licking her lips as she eyed up Lucy, almost annoyed that she had been interrupted. “No.” 

She moved back gripping Lucy's wrist tighter, making a point that she wasn't allowed to touch. 

The older brunette looked down at Ona as she gently rolled her hips into her girlfriend's mouth, her warm brown eyes burning into her own. She loved looking at Ona while the girl ate her out, she always looked amazing as her head bobbed between her legs, especially when she watched Lucy. 

Lucy gapped as her head rolled back, her body melting as the Spaniard's tongue danced on her clit. The younger brunette could see and hear Lucy getting close, her breathing picked up, her groaning became louder, bouncing off the tiles in the room. 

“Ona,” Lucy gasped.

This was another thing Ona loved. Lucy could speak multiple languages, she could give a speech to thousands and not stutter, her brain was full to the brim with facts and information. But when Ona was between her legs, the only words that fell from her lips was her girlfriend's name.

Her strong thighs began to shake, Ona moved her hand up Lucy's thigh, teasing her entrance with her finger. Lucy panted as she automatically opened her legs for Ona. The younger girl couldn't stop the groan as she dipped a single finger easily inside her girlfriend's wet cunt.

“Fuckkk. Yes, Ona… fuck.” Lucy gasped. 

Ona began to fuck Lucy with a rough steady pace, she easily slipped in her second digit. Her own eyes closed in pleasure hearing the way Lucy took her fingers. She couldn’t take her eyes off Lucy, her face was pure bliss. Ona loved having Lucy like this, at her complete mercy.

“You’re mine aren't you Lucy?” 

“Yes, yours. I’ll always be yours.” 

“Always?”

“Always.”

“Good.” 

Her cunt started to tighten around Ona’s fingers, Ona could feel she was about to come. Lucy couldn't hold in the loud gasps that fell from her mouth. Ona fucked and sucked her girlfriend as Lucys hips rolled with more purpose. That’s when her orgasm began to bolt through her body with a few more thrusts and the steady movements of Ona’s tongue Lucy was sent flying with Ona’s name bouncing off the walls in the room.

Her groan was loud, she shook against the thin walls making it rattle. Even Ona was shocked at how loud she was, but hearing her name fall from her girlfriend's lips was always a turn on, with or without trying to prove a point to Katie.

Lucy panted hard, her eyes were closed as her body tried to keep up with the pressure of her release. Ona licked the taller brunette gently, allowing her to feel her soft tongue as much as she needed to. Lucy's hips finally came to a slow stop, her eyes looked completely hazed as she smiled down at Ona. She finally released Lucy's wrist, she would have definitely left nail indents in her skin. 

“You okay?” Ona whispered as she stood up.

“Are you really asking that?” Lucy chuckled breathlessly.

The Spaniard smiled as she eyed up the dark marks that littered Lucy's neck and chest.

“Just checking.” 

Lucy brought her mouth to Ona’s, she groaned as she tasted herself on the shorter brunettes tongue. The kiss had started out slow but quickly turned heated and messy again, and Ona still held all the control. 

The Spaniard was still feeling that hot green jealousy sitting in her stomach, and Lucy could feel it, she wanted Ona to know that she was the only girl she wanted, she wanted her to feel as wanted as she made her.

“Show me how much you want me.” Ona whispered against Lucy's lips.

Lucy felt her head flood with arousal, she wasn't sure if it was her the mind blowing orgasm or Ona’s words that made her legs feel like jelly 

The taller girl got to her knees, and in between Ona’s legs, never once taking her eyes off of the younger brunnete. Lucy wouldn't admit this to many people, but she loved being dominated by the shorter brunette. There was something about Ona being in complete control that made Lucy completely lose herself to the younger girl. 

The warm shower water ran down her face, as she felt Ona’s fingers lace through her dark hair.

“Show me, Luce.” 

Lucy barely heard the words, but just by Ona’s desperate eyes she knew what she wanted. 

She allowed Ona to guide her head to her dripping sex. She slipped her tongue into Ona’s wet folds, a deep groan rumbled in the back of Lucy's throat as she gathered the taste of her girlfriend's essence on her tongue.

Ona let out a sharp hiss, as Lucy's strong tongue glided across her bundle of nerves. She had felt her clit throbbing since watching Lucy play, she could feel the pent up frustration and anger run through her veins, thinking about Lucy being with someone else. She knew Lucy didn’t want Katie or cared for her antics, but it didn’t mean she didn’t get a little hurt and self conscious. 

Lucy craned her neck, lapping her tongue through her lover's lips. She closed her eyes as Ona’s nails gently scratched through her scalp. She flicked her tongue over the peaking clit, then softly wrapped her lips around the sensitive flesh, earning her a delicious moan from above. She looked up at the younger brunette, her abs flexed as her body reacted to the sensation between her legs. Ona was already starting to pant above her. 

Ona was already losing her nerve, she dipped one hand into Lucy's hair, placing the other against the wall above her leaning herself forward, pining Lucy’s head against the cubicle wall.

Ona felt Lucy groan at the movement, she was in Ona’s complete control, she just had to kneel and watch as Ona used her mouth. 

“I love it when you do that with your tongue.” Ona gasped. 

Lucy had moved her tongue as deep as she could into Ona’s cunt, pushing at her sensitive muscles, then slowly stroking it back up to her awaiting clit. It was a move that always had Ona drenching her mouth, and today was no different. Lucy swallowed Ona’s juices as they dripped onto her tongue, drowning her taste buds.

“Lucyyy.”

Ona’s hips began to pick up pace, Lucy’s tongue was already nearing her to her peak. Ona gritted her teeth as she felt her climax rise, her hand in Lucy’s hair got tighter as she began to feel her orgasm.

Lucy groaned as Ona pulled her hair, fucking her face, the hot shower ran over their bodies but the cold chill that ran over Ona’s skin gave her goosebumps all over her body. Ona held Lucy's head, snaking her hips into her face, gently fucking her head against the cubicle wall. They were definitely making a lot of noise, they sounded like a porn set, there was no way they were going to be able to show their faces at this gym again.

“Lu…Lucy, keep sucking. Please.” Ona begged.

But a loud banging on their door interrupted them.

“This is a public space. It's really gross what you’re doing.” It was Katie's annoying voice.

Lucy’s eyes widened in panic, her hands gripped the younger brunette's thighs. But Ona didn't care, smiled dangerously down at Lucy, she didn't even stop her movements in Lucy's mouth, even if they were being called out for the public indecency. 

“Sorry, Lucy can’t answer you right now, her mouth's a little busy.” Ona groaned.

Lucy felt a rush of excitement crash through her body, she finaly put two and two together, her jealous girlfriend had done this on purpose, she wasn't even mad, she would have probably done the same thing. She winked up at Ona, knowing it would only push the girl further.

“That's it, keep going baby.” Ona smiled wickedly down at Lucy.

Lucy did exactly what her petite lover asked, she sucked on her throbbing clit just the way she liked. They stayed like this for a couple more minutes, Ona’s movements rocked gently against her mouth, until she started to feel Ona’s body shake against her face, she could tell she was close.

“Lucyyyy!” 

Lucy’s head was forced against the wall as the Spaniard’s orgasm took over her body. Ona’s hips fucked her mouth, causing a pornagraphic thudding noise with the back of Lucy's head. Lucy couldn't stop the groan as she felt Ona’s clit pulsate in her mouth. She stayed on Ona’s clit, gently sucking as her abs rolled above her. 

“Oh Déu meu.” Ona groaned. 

She stroked Lucy's hair as she slowly backed away, a dopey smile plastered her face as she looked down at the brunette.

“Fuck.” Lucy chuckled.

“Lu-,” 

“Excuse me, can you please gather your belongings and leave the premises, before we call the police.” The security guard shouted.

Both girls' eyes widened this time.

“Y-yeah, leaving now.”

The girls had never put clothes on quicker in their life. They grabbed their bags and walked out the shower room. They were greeted by a pissed off looking security guard and Katie, who looked even more pissed off.

“I’m sure you’re aware you're banned from here.” He grunted. 

“Yeah.” The girls said in unison. 

“Okay, please leave the premises.” 

The girls nodded, and began to walk away.

“What? That's it?” Katie gasped.

The security guard nodded, already bored of the situation. Ona looked back at Katie, she looked like a toddler that was about to have a breakdown, she stomped her foot and pouted.

“Bye, Katie. Try not to think of me fucking my girlfriend when you’re next in the showers.” Ona blew the blonde a kiss as she grabbed Lucy's hand.

Maybe Lucy could pick up a new sport.

#woso soccer #women’s football #woso community #woso #lucy bronze #woso fanfics #woso smut #ona batlle #lucy bronze smut #ona batlle smut #barca femeni

[monitorkernelaccess]

she looks so scared at the end of ep 13...

#dungeon meshi #sorry for overreacting. but also. falin facial journey... #shes so scared im so sorry babygirl #girl who constantly has things just happen to her #and like she ends up different at the end as if she has gone through a character arc. but she hasn't. really #she chose to come back but that's it #aughhhhh #thistle i know you had reasons and you didn't fully realize what you were doing but #poor falin looks terrified #especially the moment right before she turns into chimera #at first she seems just horrified to realize that thistle is talking to her when he says 'dragon' #but then he says 'i'll give you a new form' and her eyes get even /wider/ #she doesn't want this!!!!! #and yea i think falin ends up happier with her post-chimera form with its leftover chimera features #but seeing it happen to her against her will... #forgive me for going a little crazy guys #i know shes fictional and i couldn't have stopped the events of The Plot but. shes. aughhhhh #shes so scared!!!!!! #i want plot device girl to live a happy life thank you

[hartmannyoukaigirl]

god I really Really need to leave. Really. Seriously.

#i do well at school i socialize well enough i don't do anything. bad. like at all literally none of the typical teenager things and so #my family is like . well its alright <3 you havent killed yourself yet ❤️ but like what if i did. #and bc of that i really cant speak about ANYTHING. NEGATIVE EVER IN MY LIFE because theyll be like 'omggg what abt ur mom? have u thought #what will happen to her?? how will she feel??' and just. that woman literally told me to get out of her home and go beg in the streets and #that she will literally kill me herself #cant i be mad. cant i even just be a bit sad about that ??? #why do i have to be her angel therapist who never gets sad or affected by her words and is #constantly pampering her and #why am i obligated to offer her unconditional love when she has always outright hated me #why the hell am i the big bad horrible villian when i say i want a better place for myself. 'ur mom loves you!!' yeah. when im dead #but sure as hell not as i am #sighs </3 whats really horrible is that LITERALLY NO ONE affirms me or says like wow ur mother may be a bit. bad #like no matter ehaty #that woman said she hopes i get raped and yeah no i should be the ever forgiving cute girl who loves her despite her issues and #not only that but i am a DEMON from hell if i even as express negative emotions #sighs #i wish someone would just #believe me #and pick me firsy #above her

[enigma-the-anomaly]

I hate when there is anger inside my body. I am very small and my feelings are very big :(

#it really just does not matter what I do huh #it’s spring break. I was up at 9:30 and happened to stay in bed for a bit and take my time showering and stuff #you know? cuz I’m on break? And can do whatever the Hell i want? #but apparently I was ‘sleeping all day’ according to my mom #and then she reminded me to wash my hair the next time I shower. which is code for ‘your hair looks like shit’ #it’s like that one bit from friends where they’re having a funeral for the geller’s grandmother #and Monica’s mom is like “can you imagine being criticized for every little thing you do? #it’s amazing that I grew up to be the life-affirming person I am” #the joke being that she criticizes everything Monica does and is constantly trying to “fix” her #always criticizing her outfit and hair and life choices #like. that’s exactly my mother. and guess what? I fucking hate her! #and—this is a horrible thing to say I know—sometimes I wish she would just hit me #because violence and bruises are easier to spot than the covert belittling and the slow chipping away at my self esteem #all while under the guise of helping me #as if she isn’t insulting me and treating me like a mini clone of her or a goddamn toy to entertain her #she never wanted me she wanted a dress up doll #she doesn’t want nano she never wanted nano she wants a perfect girl who marries a perfect guy #and has perfect grandbabies #she’s tried to strip me of my boricua heritage in unassuming little ways #she’s tried to strip me of my desires and interests and emotions #she’s tried to ignore my trauma and logic away my mental illness #she has tried to destroy every part of me everything that makes me what I am #and she is the victim. the one with the woefully annoying stupid disobedient daughter #because i have resisted her attempts to mold me into something that I’m not #vent #im just so tired of trying to be the person she wants me to be and never being good enough #I’m tired of feeling trapped #I’m tired of feeling like an awful person #I’m so sick of her

[holyviolence]

omg i spent the whole day cleaning my entire apartment because my family was coming to visit and 1) so so so happy my adhd is being medicated now it's literally changing my life and 2) i FINALLLY got through to my dad about how he probably has ADHD too!!!!! he finally said Yeah i think i might have adhd. and my mom was like Me too (we've had this talk privately before, she knows she has adhd too lol) And my brother is literally transferring to a different school because he can't concentrate and isn't disciplined at his current uni. adhd family.

#literally thank goodness my brother was here to like Perfectly describe in real time what happens to adhd people when they go to college for #the first time. there's less structure and you fall apart. i used that as an opportunity. #i've slowly slowly slowly been chipping away at my Entire family btw. i've finally convinced my dad that medication is a GOOD THING. #i said You know. there's a lot in life that you feel like you Have to live with. but being on meds has made life so much easier and happier. #and that's when my dad finally said it. #:^) sometimes i like..... think about my family and how complicated i feel because growing up was super tough with all of them but now they #are all better people..... and i can't help but feel proud because as much as it is ABSOLUTELY great job for THEM for getting there But i #also feel uhhh partly responsible because i was constantly calling them out for shit. not always in the best way #but always standing up for others and challenging them on their worldviews and just casually talking about more liberal (as in free. not #politically) things. yes i do feel like if it wasn't for me my family would be worse people #i KNOW one of my brothers would be because he literally told me so. and it makes me happy. it is proof that my life is worthy and i have a #good impact on the world. it doesn't have to be a big thing i do to change things..... because i believe in the Ripple Effect #my dad is a teacher and he uses the proper pronouns for his trans students without complaint now. that has a good impact on SO many people #the trans students and their classmates who hear their teacher respect them. my brother is no longer homophobic he's bi lol and #if i hadn't argued with him about what bisexuality meant bc he was Wrong when i was 18 and he was 16... i wonder.... #my younger sister is one of the nicest kids i've ever met and i partly raised her. it feels great to see her be such a good kid #her best friend is a trans girl and when she first came out my sister was one of two people in their class who still wanted to be #her friend. #idk. just inspires me to keep being the best person i can be & always do what's right even if it makes people mad #bc no one can hurt me as much as my family has traumatized me (lol) and look what happened to them!! i didn't give up! and i see real change

[villainartist]

ouma's so misogynistic it's looped around into being mistaken for female attraction

#naw but it is funny asf when ppl are like 'oumas bi' and all the evidence used is just #ouma constantly ragging on girls out of nowhere and being mean and making weird sexually degrading comments to miu #like ok guys. i guess we've reverted back to the schoolyard mindset #of 'if a boy bullies you it means he has a crush on you' #listen. idc. i genuinely dont. i dont get mad at ppl who ship ouma with girls. im just saying i dont understand where yall are coming from #he really just seems like one of those gay guys who acts like 'one of the girls' and thinks being catty and rude and shitty to girls #is a 'solidarity' thing #also ouma ships in general suck balls and ass. it just happens the ships with the girls are the worst #the only ACTUAL ouma ships i can tolerate are oumota and kiibouma. and VERY conditionally saiouma. #the only girl you can ship ouma with without him wanting to hurl gendered slurs at her is kaede #also this post isnt an invitation for people to try and change my mind

[chiefguideandcentre]

I want to be a one hit wonder- sing a catchy song, write a great book, find a great acting role- doesn’t matter

Bust in, blow minds, make millions, peace out

Being a one hit wonder- one and done- that’s the dream baby

#one hit wonder #who wants to have drag on and on constantly trying to keep up with fans and critics expectations and demands #constantly having to come up with new songs or write a bunch of books or keep producing great movie roles #I don’t want the career #having to try and meet expectations only to eventually not and get dragged into next week for it #no how about I create one super great thing #go in on top and come out in top and then just peace out #what happened to this girl after her one great success? #nobody knows and she doesn’t care because she has her millions made from that one frat thing #just make your millions and then make royalties every time the song is played or the movie is shown or boom is bought #like yes that works for me #being a one hit wonder sounds better to me than the career in the spotlight that requires constant upkeep

[htylmg]

last day of school was today. thinking many thoughts

#i talked to a girl i used to have a crush on earlier this year the whole day and. hoo boy #i can see why i liked her let’s just say that #she’s just so. present yknow #like when someone talks you can tell she’s listening with everything in her #meanwhile my dumb ass is out here interrupting people all the time #but looking at her do it doesn’t make me feel worse it makes me feel BETTER #she’s like human serotonin #fuckkkkk this can’t be happening again #🫣🫠😶‍🌫️ #god. and she’s a redhead but she may be the only one who actually PULLS IT OFF #and she’s muscular. ohhh my god she’s muscular #she was wearing a tank top and a hippie skirt (cause she’s like a hippie) and at one point she jokingly flexed her back muscles and i MELTED #thing is she has a boyfriend which is just. yeah sure great #tbh i would not mind being a homewrecker for her #that basic white boy can’t compete w me i got the power of curry and good grades on my side 😤😤😤 #and one of our mutual friends all but confirmed she liked me back then too #like she app talked about me CONSTANTLY and was always checking her phone for my snaps #which got me kicking my feet twirling my hair yknow #but she told me she liked someone else back then so ??????? #he was the dumbest football bro to ever exist i couldn’t believe he was in an ap class w us #but i digress. she’s gorgeous and has an amazing personality and likes to be around me sooo #this summer is gonna be my august summer probs #ooh i can’t wait #🐋.txt

[creatingblackcharacters]

“Why’s she so rude?” (She’s Not)- Stereotypes, pt2

So I'm sure that you all thought I was going to give a blow-by-blow list of "visual stereotypes to avoid". I'm going to be honest here, I thought about it, and figured it would be redundant. My page already includes sensitivity on depicting Black people. So instead, I'm going to focus on stereotypical "character" concepts, so that you can 1) not write it in your stories and/or 2) recognize it in media (fiction and reality!) and in life!

Two major resources: the Jim Crow Museum website is an EXCELLENT resource to understand the imagery of antiblack racism in U.S. history and society. The other, White Tears, Brown Scars by Ruby Hamad. The book focuses on the many racist stereotypes projected onto women of color and how that purposeful, systemic negative perception of us bleeds into every aspect of our lives- specifically by white women/white feminists who believe that they are not contributing to said oppression.

I'll start with Black women, just because I’m passionate about it (obviously) and there are so many things I wish I had and hadn’t seen growing up. We deserve better by the year of our lord 2024.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: mention of sexual assault, assault

Misogynoir

What I want everyone to understand, before I get into this, is the concept of intersectionality, and more specifically, misogynoir. Misogynoir is the specific type of contempt and prejudice that Black women face at the intersection of race and gender. I say this because you might read these things and go “oh, as a woman, I experience these things!” I get it, but I want you to PAUSE, and remember, that right now, we are talking about Black women’s experiences. And those will often be different, due to that intersection of identities. And that understanding will have an effect on how you understand (and thus, write) those experiences.

The Jezebel

The link goes into much deeper detail, but the Jezebel is the idea that a Black woman or girl who is sexual is somehow “fast”, “salacious”, “a hoe”, “driven by desire/doesn’t understand purity”, and at its worst, unable to be r*ped/a victim because she is less valuable yet somehow inherently seductive to men.

This gets thrown around CONSTANTLY in media and life for Black women (my first experience of treated like I was ‘fast’ was when I was like… twelve?) One major, visible example is Megan Thee Stallion. Meg has a college degree, she likes anime, she’s a brilliant rapper, and has an entire personality and struggles she’s shared… But she also likes to dress scantily clad and have sex. By doing those things, she ‘lessened in value’. And because of this, when she was shot at and assaulted, even Black people questioned her character, rather than understanding that she could have been anyone, and she still wouldn’t have deserved to be assaulted. She's not allowed to be multi-faceted; she "brought it on herself".

Black girls and women who happen to take charge of their own sexuality, to the discomfort of society, are treated as Jezebels- as whores. Think about it- if one of Taylor Swift's recent boyfriends shot at her, would the media question her value or her word? Question her equivalently high ‘body count’?

Question how you write your Black woman- she can enjoy sex! She can be sexy! We love to see it! But if you're punishing her specifically, or judging her within the narrative, versus your other characters who are allowed to safely explore and act upon their sexuality… Check your judgment! Why do you feel the way you do about this character? Why do you think that your Black character is the one that should be judged for her actions. Would you feel this way if it were a nonblack character?

The Sapphire/Angry Black Woman

Ohohoho, I have infinite amounts of feelings about this one.

This is the "sassy Black friend", the "aggressive Black boss", “step on me angry mommy”, the one who does the z formation and makes everyone "uncomfortable". She’s not allowed to be confident, assertive, or self-assured- she’s arrogant, rude, and aggressive.

I discussed it in part one, but I'll reemphasize it: your Black woman doesn't have to be an ‘Angry Black Woman’ in order to be angry! Just like any other human being on the planet, we are allowed to be mad. (In my honest opinion, we have a lot to be mad about, but I digress 😅)

If the only character that ever gets angry is your Black character, I want you to consider why. What is she angry at? Was this something you wanted the reader to understand or empathize with? Are we supposed to disagree? How does everyone around her treat her anger? Is her anger righteous? Is she always shut down or dismissed for it? Is it only meant to defend her friends, but never herself? Does the narrative suggest that it’s only good in use of others and not herself? Would this be the same reaction if one of the nonblack characters was angry? Is this something you did on purpose?

Very often, we're called 'angry Black women/girls' to invalidate our emotions. My therapist once said anger is a protective emotion. We might be hurt, overstimulated, sad, depressed, frightened, anxious… But we are often not allowed the grace of others digging deeper to see that. Even if the other characters do not understand her anger, even if her motives are not meant to be understood at the moment… you as the writer should be aware. But if every time it’s time to show anger or upset, it’s your Black character… consider why this is the one you thought would best convey that message, and how your Black readers might feel seeing that this character (who may not even be the ‘bad guy’) is the one that is ‘only’ angry. No other development, no other emotions, just… there to be mad.

I take this one to heart, as someone who feels very passionately about things… this is one of those things where I wish, in life and in media, people would have more grace for Black women. We're human, too. We have feelings, too.

The Mammy

This one isn’t as visually blatant anymore in media as it was in the past (like every Mammy doesnt look like Aunt Jemima), but you may have seen this one as "the mommy figure". The "lesbian that parents the silly gay boys". The one that’s always encouraging the ship of the white boys, but never the one allowed to be in the ship (especially when her ship is canon!)

A good example of this was how people expected Jessica Drew from ATSV to be "more loving" to Gwen, rather than the mentor and boss she was (plus, as a Black woman with a Black mother… trust and believe, she was quite direct and gentle). And in comparison to her counterpart, white man Peter B. Parker, was decried far worse for similar detrimental actions.

The Mammy often serves in opposition to the Jezebel and Sapphire/Angry Black Woman. What makes the Mammy particularly annoying is that it implies that the only good Black woman character is a ‘nice’, demure, unthreatening, homely, motherly figure whose job it is to make sure to center the (usually) white ones. The Mammy is expected to coddle everyone, to her own detriment. She's a ‘good Black’ because she causes no issue, raises no fuss, never shows a negative feeling, knows that she has to ‘be strong’ but to always defer because the white characters know best. She’s ‘not a threat’, and that’s why she’s ‘allowed’ to be around. We shouldn’t have to be those things in order for our stories to be heard and understood, in order to be empathized with or treated like someone of value.

The Strong Black Woman

If I never hear this phrase again in my life, if we eradicate it from future generations for Black girls and women, I'll cry of joy lmao. I hate it, and it's not for the reasons most nonblack people would expect. Lord, this one. Anyway. The ‘strong Black woman’ is meant to protect everyone, no help needed! Whenever something is wrong and we all need a pickup, here she comes to ‘let me do it’ and everything is going to be okay! She did all the necessary suffering so that your characters don't have to! She can sweep in and save the day!

Now here's the dissonance kicks in. This one on its surface probably sounds like a good thing. She's a hero! She’s resilient! She's great! Who wouldn't want to be superwoman? Who wouldn't want to reject being a love interest, all women are always love interests! Let us be the badass that kicks ass and shows the men what for! Who wouldn’t want that, 24/7?!

The answer: US. 👍🏾🤣

This is a long, separate conversation on its own, but we have to understand that Black women (women of color, really) and White women do not always share the same end goals and understanding of "strong woman character" or even feminism. We certainly aren't always the love interest. Very usually not, in fact. We are always pushed to the side. We are already the hero in our lives, we're already the "strong woman".

Not everyone yearns to be the Singular Hero who will Fix It All as many of us are already expected to do. It's exhausting having to swallow your own needs for everyone else all the time, especially when it's suggested that you have no value otherwise if you don't. Heroism is Exhausting, and it's something worth looking into when you’re characterizing your Black girls and women. I’m not saying that we can’t be strong! We are, and it’s impressive! But I also want us to add some nuance to that strength, the way we would for any other character. What it means to have community, rather than to do it all alone. How even if she wants to be the hero (and that’s okay! That’s fine!) how it would still wear on her. Surrounding your Black girl character with unconditional support, to have a lover that actually wants to pull some weight- that's something many of us actually would like to see, because we're usually shafted to the side as 'someone who can do it all herself' (in order to hide that no one thinks we need or are deserving of the help).

It's okay to let your Black woman and girls show weakness, to rest, to be taken care of! It's not "less feminist" to accept that we're humans that need help and can't carry it all, too. That it’s okay to want to feel valued and protected. Because god knows, I wish I didn’t grow up strong and resilient, I wish I grew up knowing that the world cared that I was safe.

Standards of Beauty

These standards are not the same! I've mentioned it before in my lesson on skin tones, but very often when we think of "beauty", it’s easy to fall into the idea of whiteness. Pale skin, thin hair textures, etc. If those are our existing standards of beauty, then it doesn’t matter what any of us look like- we’re ugly! When I was in high school, I remember a classmate saying that Swedish people were the most beautiful people because of "white hair and pale skin". Without even meaning to, that guy basically said everyone darker than a stack of loose leaf printer paper was ugly by proxy of not being Nordic White (no matter how pretty they actually might be!!) 🤣

It’s also of note that whiteness/paleness tends to be connected with innocence and cleanliness in western culture, while blackness/darkness tends to be considered dirty, sinful, fearful. Now, while the origin of this idea may not be racist itself, when you spend hundreds of years implying that Blackness is bad- to the point that, in the U.S. they came up with an entire slur one step past “negro” (meaning ‘Black’) to deem you less than- it’s hard to say that the societal connotation didn’t apply.

Now we've already discussed working on describing our Black characters better! I continually remind you all that you should be describing them as wonderfully made as you do your white characters. Keep in mind that we live in a world where from day one when we enter the world, Blackness and Black features are not seen as beautiful nor emphasized. Whiteness is the standard of beauty that we, for a long time and still, are expected to adhere to. If you'd like to do better by your characters, remember that you don't have to give them "white features" or use "white" as an adjective to do that!

Black Women as Women

“There was literally nothing, not a thing, that a white woman could ever have that was worth more than her sexual virtue, and this obligated mandatory chasteness and sexual vulnerability… If the most important thing a woman has is virtue, and only white women can have virtue, then by definition, only white women can be women.” Ruby Hamad, ‘Only White Women Can Be Damsels’, White Tears, Brown Scars

Often, Black women by definition are not included under the societal banner of “women”, from our features, to our personalities, to our 'role' in life. "True Womanhood" is denied us, cis and trans, because of our Blackness. The things that make women ‘women’, we are not included under, because systemically, the only ‘women’ that were meant to mean anything were white.

I bring up Megan Thee Stallion again. Meg is probably one of the most beautiful, feminine women I've ever seen in my life. Men still call her a man, due to her height, due to her confidence, and due to their insecurities. Same with Serena Williams; Serena is damn near built like a god in my eyes. She was told she was manly from the beginning of her career, no matter how beyond skilled she was in women's tennis. Even when she damn near died giving birth- the most basic of 'tasks' women are seen as having in this society, it didn't matter. Black women are 'less womanly', 'less valuable', 'less in need' of that protection and identity that society swears Women™ need (and not in the honest way that we do need protection).

Consider that you're making sure that your Black women have the options of range of gender expression and emotions (and if they aren't allowed to, is that on purpose). If you're only ever creating us and we're in service of some dainty white woman and never the other way around... consider how that may reflect what you think our role is in your story, and in your mind.

Adultification

“Awkward moment when Rue is some black girl and not the innocent blond girl you imagine.” twitter: sw4q

It has been shown that Black girls the same age as their white girl counterparts are deemed older and less in need of protection, and supposed to 'be more mature'. Imagine that. Deemed inherently less innocent, due to your skin color. Having to parent our siblings, get jobs to contribute, do all the cleaning, and more. Yet, when we act with the maturity that we've been forced to grow into, we're "fast". A little 12-year-old girl, now to society, the Jezebel. All because she wanted to try pink lip gloss or wear a skirt; things that little tween girls might try to understand the big world around them and push boundaries. Now she's a woman, now she can never be a victim. Now she can be beat on and hurt and it's her fault.

I explain this for two reasons: One, for you to think about how your write your Black girls, and Two, for you to hold more grace for Black girls- real and fake. Do you hold her to a higher standard than your white characters of similar age? Does she inherently seem less innocent to you for reasons outside the plot? Is she as human to you as your other characters? Is she allowed to be a child? To act like one? To make mistakes? Are you as empathetic or understanding about that childishness as you are towards nonblack characters? Do you make these decisions on purpose?

It's not like Black girls can never be YA protags or anything- ofc we can. But keep in mind that she's not somehow automatically "stronger" by proxy of her Blackness, that she'd "be tougher". She's a kid. Let her be one.

Conclusion

There’s a LOT you have to consider when writing Black girls and women. I’m not going to sit here and say it’s easy, because being Black, and being a Black woman, is not easy. If you’re stressed reading it, imagine being stressed living it lmao. It’s a constant chain of quick-time events every day of your life to prevent nonblack nuclear meltdown in response to your every single action. I’m not going to apologize for it, either.

That being said, I don’t expect you to understand everything, especially not all at once. I just want you all to keep these things in mind, to question yourself when you’re writing your character- are you treating her differently on purpose? Or are you treating her differently because of a bias you might not even notice you have? It might help to go back, to read how you treat all of your characters. Or, if you’ve never written before, to maybe outline the traits of your characters and figure out where things balance out. As always, all you can do is practice at it. Because it's the thought that counts, but the action that delivers.

Whew, I'm actually emotionally strained after this one. My chest is beating fast. Let me go get some groceries now.

#creatingblackcharacters #character design #black characters #black character design #writing #creative writing #stereotypes #antiblackness #racism

[springseasonie]

Notice Me | LHC (M)

Friends to lovers

Summary: You and your friends go to a college party, and tonight is the night where you are finally going to try and catch your crush's attention, who also happens to be one of your good friends. He doesn't think that he thinks of you in that way, but what happens when he sees you with another guy at the party?

Warnings: sexual content, protected sex, auralism, guided masturbation (kinda), sensory deprivation, super vanilla, reader is legally blind (trust it's important 🙏🏾), long haired haechan, violence (minor fight scene), special appearances: Karina and Yunjin

Word count: 7,5k

Song recs: moment by Victoria Monet

A/N: wrote this on a random whim. Def not my best writing but oh well. Hope you guys like it. I will start working on request after this one I promise 🫶🏾 feedback is loved and appreciated

“Are you guys sure I don't look crazy?” 

“Yes we're sure! Now let's go, we're already 45 minutes late and Mark is yelling at me in my messages!” 

Karina grabbed your hand, pulling you into the frat house followed by your other best friend Yujin. A chill ran down your spine and also your legs, never having this much skin exposed. This was new to you– dressing in skimpy clothes and college parties. But that wasn't the only thing new to you. Having a crush is also very new. 

The only reason you're even here is because of him. Haechan to be exact, who is a part of your friend group. He's the exact opposite of you– loud, cheerful, outgoing. But maybe that's why you like him so much. Opposites attract. 

And that's why you're standing in the middle of the doorway, looking like a deer in headlights in the shortest skirt and tiniest top ever. Tonight was gonna be all about catching his attention. It was going to be about making him look at you like a woman and not a friend. 

You walk through the crowd of people, their bodies constantly smashing yours. The constant bumping makes your glasses slide down your nose, making you fear that you may lose them. Most people think you're being dramatic when you say you can't see without them, but you're as blind as a bat.

Mark and Haechan soon come into view, standing in a circle with their other friends from the basketball team. 

“But don't you guys remember- woah..” Mark turned his head, stopping mid sentence when he saw Karina, and Yujin walking towards them. 

“Hey guys,” Yunjin said excitedly. 

Everyone said their hellos, but you couldn't help but notice the way their eyes lingered on you, all except Haechan. He spared you one glance and one hello before going silent, sipping whatever it was in his cup. You felt yourself die inside, the way he was treating you like an acquaintance all of a sudden. Was it too much? Did you go too far? 

“Sorry were we so late, it takes a long time getting ready,” Karina says, fixing her hair. 

“I'm sure it did.” Mark is still eyeing you like you've said something weird. None of them has ever seen you like this. You're always pretty much covered up. Hoodies and leggings are your daily attire. 

Mark turns his attention to you, scoffing in disbelief. “And look at you, walking in here looking like a sexy Velma.” 

“Oh shut up, she looks good. Right Haechan, doesn't she look good,” Yujin inquires. 

The male glances at you then back to Yujin then at Mark, whose brow is raised waiting for his answer. “You look…nice Y/N.” 

Nice? That's it? “Thanks,” you say, hands glued to your sides. 

Karina sighed, shaking her head at the dry response. “You guys suck at compliments,” she said. “Anyway, let's go get something to drink.” She took a hold of both Yujin and your hands, pulling you to the kitchen. 

Eyes never left your figure since you walked in the building. There were other girls dressed just like you, but for some reason all attention remained on you, and you didn't like it. So used to being a background character in your own life, you'll never get used to attention. 

“God you look hot, we did so good,” Yujin whispered to you, her voice slightly muffled because of the loud music. 

“Do I? He didn't have much of a reaction,” you argued, a frown tugging at your lips. 

“Everyone's been ogling at you all night, even Mark. You definitely look hot,” Karina reassures. “Besides, maybe you'll meet someone else here that you'll like. Haechan doesn't know what he's missing.” 

“Yeah, honestly if he doesn't do anything tonight, you need to move on sister,” Yunjin adds. “Can't keep dwelling on the same guy for 3 years.” 

But you don't want to move on. And if he rejects you, you know that you can't regardless. You'll still like him, because he's a good guy and always has been. There's probably nothing that could make you think anything less. Karina continued to pull you to the kitchen between the bodies when you suddenly bumped your shoulder into someone, causing them to drop something. 

“Oh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean-” 

“It's no problem,” he said, a smirk tugging at his lips. “No big deal. It was just my phone.” 

You didn't even notice you lost the hold of Karina’s hand at this point, your attention being on the man in front of you. “D-did it break? I'll pay for it.” 

“No, it's doing just fine,” he said, placing the phone in his pocket without sparing a glance. He eyed you up and down, his gaze undressing you right in front of him. “What's your name?”

“Y/N,” you answered, gulping slightly out of nervousness. “Yours?” 

“Johnny.” Licking his lips, he narrows his eyes slightly while speaking to you. “You new around here? I've never seen you on campus before.”

“Well, I actually don't go here,” you say, words leaving your mouth a little too fast. “I have a couple of friends that do. They invited me to this party.” 

“Cool,” he said. “Can I… get you a drink?” 

Your eyes widened, a bit taken back by the sudden request, but you didn't disapprove of it at all. Johnny was cute, tall, had a nice voice and seemed like a nice guy. So why not take the offer? “Yeah, sure. That would be great.” 

 -

“Man, he sure is chatting her up,” Mark remarks, watching you and the unknown guy stand and talk while sipping on your drink.

“How can he not? She looks great tonight,” Yunjin comments. “Doesn't she Haechan?” 

Haechan furrows his brows, side eyeing her as he man-spreads on the couch they're all sitting on. “Why me specifically?” 

“Why not?” Yunjin shrugs. 

Haechan rolls his eyes, looking down at his lap trying to focus on anything but the scene in front of him, but he can't help it. You did look good, you looked great. But for some reason he couldn't say it. His stiffness towards you when you came in was because of how different you looked. Haechan wouldn't say he had a crush on you , more so complicated feelings. He didn't yearn for you, but he wouldn't hate it if something sprung from your friendship. 

Haechan knows that his female friends are attractive. Guys always talk about Karina and Yunjin, telling him that he should pursue them or sleep with them, that he's wasting his time being friends. He's never looked at them in that way, but with you it's a different story. You're easy to talk to, and you have lots in common with him. He also loves your glasses. It's something you don't like about yourself, but he thinks they make you look pretty. You've always been pretty to him, probably his exact type on paper. Someone who's smart, calm, a bit of a homebody, true to themselves. 

But disregarding any of that, he didn't have a crush on you. He wasn't into you in that way, despite what everyone else in the friend group thinks. His eyes narrow watching you cross your arms, throwing your head back while laughing at something. “So funny,” he mumbled. 

“You said something,” Yunjin asked. 

“No.”

“Sure… you know, if you like her you should-” 

“I don't like her. We are just friends,” he cuts her off.

Yunjin sighs, making her head. “Haechan you are fooling no one but yourself. I'll let you in on a little secret. Y/N has a crush on you,” she says, hoping that would help him open his eyes. 

Haechan stays silent, expression remaining stoic and straight as he stares directly at the male putting his hand on your hip. That's when he feels a slight sting in his chest. The small ping of jealousy. 

“How would you know that,” he says after a few beats of silence between them. 

“Why do you think she dressed up tonight? God, use your brain.” 

Before Haechan could respond, he watched as someone walked past you, bumping you on the shoulder. He watched as the drink fell out of your hand, almost like a cliche movie. 

The liquid splashed all over the guy’s chest, but he didn't seem too upset. In fact, he looked happy to Haechan, especially when you dabbed the paper towels all over his chest

“God, I am so sorry,” he heard you say panicked. Just as soon as you thought you were done panicking someone else walked beside you, bumping you in the shoulder. You must've been getting bumped all night because your glasses fell. 

“Shit,” you said. You dropped to your knees, feeling around the floor for your frames. “I-Im sorry can you please-”

You look up at Johnny, but you see nothing but a flash in your face. “J-Johnny?”

“God, has anyone ever seen you like this,” he laughed softly. “You're so hot, I could just-”

You heard a loud smack above you, followed by gasp and tons of commotion.

“What the fuck? Who the fuck are you,” you heard Johnny yell. 

“She's looking for her glasses. Aren't you gonna help,” you heard a voice similar to Haechan say. 

Johnny laughed, scoffing at the guy you couldn't see. “Is she your girl or something? You should keep her on a leash before I take her to my place and show her what a good time is.”

“Excuse me,” the other guy grumbled. You were still searching for your glasses, but from what you could tell, a group started to form around the 2 guys and yourself 

 “You heard me. Get your bitch or-”

A loud sound was heard coupled with oh’s and ah’s from the crowd. 

You heard another sound. This time, it sounded like a punch. There was a fight happening, and you were on the ground still looking for your glasses. Just as you reached in another direction on the floor, you felt hands pull your body up. 

“What the fuck was he thinking,” you hear Karina groan. She turned your body, placing your glasses back on your face. For the first time in a minute you can see, and you do not like what you see. 

Haechan and Mark were currently trying to fight Johnny and his two friends. “What is going on? Why is everyone fighting all of a sudden?” 

“Let's just get away from all this, and we'll tell you.”

You were pulled away, Karina and Yujin dragging you outside to the driveway away from the loudness of the party. “So what exactly is going on?” 

“Okay, so basically-” Karina started to speak, but Yujin cut her off quickly. 

“Everyone was watching you and that guy hit it off the whole time, but Haechan looked like he was gonna kill someone. So I said, you know if you like her you should tell her. And he was like I don't like her , we're just friends. Then he saw you trying to clean off that guy's shirt. Then your glasses fell and you got on the ground and-”

“I'm sorry, but what does that have anything to do with what just happened in there,” you say exasperated. 

“Well when your glasses fell and you got down to look for them your-”

“Oh my God.” Karina looked at her phone shocked. You and Yunjin stood next to her to see the screen, and was immediately horrified. 6 different people recorded and took pictures of you looking for your glasses on the floor. Every post had people calling you names ranging from desperate to slut. You didn't realize at the time, but almost your entire ass was out, and your cleavage could be seen clearly. 

“Fuck,” you groaned. “i'm going to kill myself.” You placed your face in your hands, covering the embarrassed expression. 

“Yeah,” Yunjin said, lips pursed right after. “That's what happened.” 

“Why did you guys let me do that” you whined. 

“We were on the couch, surprised. We thought you were trying to seduce the guy, but then we saw him pull his phone out and everything went to hell,” she explains. 

At this point you're pacing the driveway, trying to figure what to do about the party, the post, Johnny, Haechan, everyone. “Well now we have to leave,” you said. “We've been here for less than 2 hours and we have to leave.”

“Okay, well let me call them,” Yujin said. Just as she pulled out her phone, a voice was heard behind her. 

“No need,” Mark said, making his presence known. 

The three of you turned back to see them with their clothes messed up, cuts and bruises on their faces, and tired. 

“Oh my God,” Karina says with her hand over her mouth. “Are you guys okay?” 

“We're fine…well I'm fine. He's a bit..” 

You look over at Haechan who's standing there with his hands in his pockets. You don't know what came over you, but you took a couple of steps towards him, anger filling your mind. 

“Why would you do that,” you said. Your voice startled him, making him look up from the ground. 

“Y/N I-”

“I had no idea what was going on, and you two getting into a fight scares me to death,” you told him. “How did you even get all the cuts on your faces?” 

“Him and his friends had rings and stuff on,” he mumbled, shrugging. “Shit happens.” 

There weren't many times Haechan has seen you upset. The last time you were this mad was when Mark accidentally deleted your essay from your laptop doing his homework. 

“We have to leave right now,” you sighed, arms folded at your chest. “I won't know what to do if you get into another fight and you're already hurt like this.”

Without thinking, your hands reach up to his face, taking his chin between your fingers as you check his face for any other injuries that you can't see. Haechan thought he was crazy when the butterflies erupted in his stomach, but they erupted again when you looked at him with pity, like you cared about him. He hadn't felt that way in a long time. Getting attention from girls came easy to him, but none of the girls he's dealt with made him feel the way you do. 

 “I'll um..I'll get an Uber for us-”

“No I'll get it,” you said. “We're going back to my house, you can't take care of all these by yourself.” 

There it was, more butterflies. 

“We'll go back to Mark’s and help him out,” Karina said, side eyeing Yunjin. 

Yunjin quickly nodded, picking up the message Karina was sending. “Yep! Absolutely! We'll see you tomorrow!” 

“What? I don't need help. I'm a grown man,” he whined. Karina and Yunjin nudged Mark who didn't seem to understand what was going on, making the man look at them confused.

“Grown men don't get into fights at parties,” you snap. “We'll see you guys tomorrow.” 

-

“Wait in the bathroom. I'm going to change super quickly.” You shut your door behind you, locking it before kicking your shoes off. Before walking to your room, you turn to Haechan who looks as stiff as wood. “You look uncomfortable.” 

Haechan watched as you walked away from him, going to your kitchen instead of your room. You grabbed a mug, filling it with water. He's never been so uncomfortable with you, but right now he feels like he could explode. You look so good in your current outfit, the way your hips sway when you walk, the way the shirt hugs your chest. He feels like he shouldn't be looking at you like this, but he feels like he's the only one who should be allowed. 

“Here.” You hand him the mug, looking at him in the eyes like usual. 

Haechan gulps, forcing himself to stop, keeping his eyes on yours and not let the travel any further. “Thanks,” he says, taking it out of your hands. 

“Take your shoes off and relax,” you say. “I'll meet you in the bathroom in 5 minutes.” 

He watches you walk away, holding his breath until you shut the door behind you. “Fuck,” he sighs. The one thing he can't do is get hard standing at your front door. Haechan knows he wouldn't be able to explain that, let alone lie to you about it. The only thing he could do is sit in your bathroom like you asked, and wait for you to put normal clothes on. 

But Haechan is only a man. When you walked into the bathroom with short shorts and a laced lined camisole, the only thing he could do was pray for his presumed innocence. Pray that he didn't make a fool of himself in your house. 

You reached up in your medicine cabinet taking out the pain meds and supplies for his injuries. It took you 10 seconds to get everything out, but for him it felt like 10 years. The way the fabric rose as you lifted your arms, watching you lean your hips on the edge of the counter giving him the smallest piece of your ass to stare at. And the way your nipples poked through the shirt– he was going to pass out right then and there. 

There's nothing Haechan wanted more than to get behind you, feel up on your body. Whatever you were planning for the party worked because now he can't keep his mind off of you, and soon, it'll be his hands. To think you wore that outfit for him, he never would've guessed it. 

“I can change if you need me to,” you said softly, startling him. 

“N-no you don't need to change,” he said, watching you take two pills of pain meds out of the container. 

“Take these.” You handed him the pills, watching him drink them down as you leaned on the counter. Haechan was sitting on the toilet seat, so the sight of him taking deep gulps with his eyes closed was a treat to say the least. You shouldn't be eyeing him like this, but God, was he attractive, even with bruises and cuts. “Are you feeling any better?” 

“Gotta wait for them to kick in first,” he joked, but there was no smile on his face. 

You grabbed an ointment for his bruises, opening it and squeezing some on your fingers. Haechan watched you as you tended to his wounds, concentrating on not trying to hurt him. He loved the way you would bite your lip whenever you were trying to concentrate, he always did. 

The silence was comforting for a while, but then his thoughts got the best of him. Both of you actually. Your chest was in his face, his eyes wouldn't leave yours. The less talking there was, the more sexual tension filled the air, so you needed to get rid of it. But your mouth moves faster than your brain and for some reason, you felt it was the perfect moment to come clean about your intentions with him.

“I have something to confess,” you said softly. 

“What is it?” 

“I wore that outfit for you tonight,” you said, fixing your glasses on your nose bridge. 

He smiled to himself, but you didn't see. “I have something to confess.” 

“Hm,” you hummed. 

“I already knew that.” 

You let out a soft gasp, laughter soon following. “How did you know?” 

“Yunjin,” he said simply. You let out a sigh, shaking your head making him chuckle softly. 

“That girl can't keep a secret to save her life.” You moved on from his bruise, now tending to the scratches on his cheeks. Taking your fingers you apply the cream on the scratches, making him wince. “I only have a little bit left. This is why you shouldn't get in fights Mr. Lee.” 

“Well, I..” he hesitated. “I fought for you.” 

For a second you felt your heart drop. The guy you liked for 3 years fought for you, and you had absolutely nothing to say. “Thank you” was all you could manage. “But…why?” 

“He was…an ass.” Memories of the guy recording you why you were down struck his brain, pissing him off all over again. “He was treating you like some kind of sexual fantasy. And I don't like that.” 

You frowned, remembering that videos and pictures of yourself looking for your glasses are now circulating the Internet. “Yeah…”

“And I didn't like the way he was touching you,” he said, wincing at the feeling of you putting the bandage on. 

“You sound like a protective father,” you joke, trying to lighten the mood. “I appreciate you for defending me, but there's no reason to get hurt while doing it.” 

“But I want to,” he says, making you pause. “Y/N, I think I like you.” 

“I-I..uh..” You wanted so badly to say you liked him too, but now you were nervous. Your face was beating up, fogging your glasses. Be cool, be normal. “T-thanks..” 

“Thanks?” Haechan laughs softly. “That's what I get for fighting.” 

“No, that's not what I meant! I meant-”

“I know what you meant, and it's fine,” he reassured you. “I think I liked you for a long time, just didn't know if you felt the same way.” 

“How long is a long time to you?” 

“A couple months,” he answered. 

You sighed, a slight wave of disappointment filling your chest. “I wanted you for 3 years.” 

Haechan's eyes widened slightly, brows shooting up hearing your words. “3 years? Why didn't you tell me?” 

“Because I'm the kind of girl you befriend, not date,” you answered bitterly. 

“That's not true.” 

“All the girls you like are exactly like you. They're loud, adventurous, cool, hot, wear skimpy clothing,” you argued. “I'm just not your type.” 

“Well that can't be true now, because it seems like you are exactly my type,” he stated. 

“For now.” You started treating his last bit of scratches, scrunching your nose to keep your glasses from slipping again. “Why do you think I wore that outfit? I just wanted you to notice me.” 

“But I noticed you. I do all the time,” he revealed. 

“But it wasn't until tonight which made you realize that,” you added. And with that final comment, you finished tending to his wounds, placing the last bandage on his face. “I'm all done. If you wanna go home, I can-” 

“No,” he said. Haechan placed his hands on the back of your thighs, his soft palms sending lightning through your body. “I'm staying here.” 

You could barely think straight with him touching you, the hold on your legs just getting stronger and stronger, his thumbs pressing into your skin. That's when Haechan kisses up your clothed stomach softly and slowly, making your lashes and heart flutter as you watch him from above. 

“Haechan, stop,” you sigh. “Y-you're not thinking straight.” 

He stands up, his lanky figure looming over yours. You swear you feel dizzy the moment his cologne hits your nose. He pulls you closer, his pelvis on yours. You could feel his hard on sitting right on your aching cunt. 

“I know you feel it,” he whispers. “I know you feel the tension here. And I know you feel how hard I am too.” 

Gulping, you look away from him. This is everything you've fantasized about for the last 3 years, but something is telling you no. Something is telling you it's too good to be true. “Maybe..maybe we should wait.”

Haechan takes your chin in his bruised knuckles, lifting your chin to look at him, but all you can see are his pretty lips hovering over yours. “Are you sure you wanna wait? Because I'm not sure I can hold myself back for even a second.” 

His free hand travels up your leg, his fingertips grazing the heat between your legs ever so slightly, teasing you even more. “You have no idea how pissed it made me feel seeing that guy touch and feel on you, knowing it should've been me.” 

“That's why you fought him?” 

The breathiness of your words almost made him spiral. You were breathing heavily, your chest pressed against his so turned on at every little thing he did. 

“Mhm,” he mumbled. “Seeing you walk around in that tiny skirt knowing I couldn't have you..”

“You have me now..” 

“You're right, I do.” 

Haechan kisses you just as you imagined, soft and with care. He kept kissing you, each kiss making you feel high. His hands left your face and leg, grabbing a hold of your waist. You yelp, feeling your body be lifted onto the end of your sink, legs spread apart as he stands between them. His tongue entered your mouth, the kisses slowing down and lingering a bit. 

Haechan places his hands on your sides, soon traveling to your chest. Hard nipples looking through the fabric, teasing him the whole time he's been in your house can finally be his. Haechan hooks his fingers on the bottom of your shirt, begging to pull it up when you grab his wrist, stopping him. 

You pull away painfully slow, a strong of saliva still connecting your lips only for a second. “Can we go to my room?” 

Haechan said nothing, just backing away from your body and pulling you off the counter. He pulled you to your room, still messy as always. He always loved your house, especially your room. Something about it felt like home. There's always little bits of you scattered throughout your space, whether it be homework, a brush, a mug, or even a sock. It doesn't matter how many times he comes over, it always feels the same. 

But this time it felt a little different. He wasn't going to your room to hang out with the others, he was going to have sex with you. Going to make out with you, to be more than friends with you. This was going to change everything about your relationship with him, but it didn't matter right now. All that mattered was making you feel good. 

Haechan sat on your bed looking up at you, mirroring his previous actions in your bathroom. You were more nervous than ever now with him sitting there expectantly. Fixing your glasses, you placed your hand on his shoulder, climbing on his body to straddle him. 

“Can I take your top off,” his whispered peppering soft kisses down your neck. 

You nod, giving him permission. Haechan hooks his fingers on the hem of your top, lifting the fabric off your body. He feels like he's 16 again, like this is his first time seeing a woman's chest, except it's yours, which is much more important. He starts kissing you slow, his hands naturally finding their way to your chest. You shuddered at the way his cold palms molded your breasts, shaky breaths leaving your mouth and into his every once in a while. 

Haechan started kissing down your jaw, then to your neck, making tilt your head to give him more access. His hands leave your chest for a bit, placing them on your back pulling you closer to his body. Your nipples touch the cold of the print on his graphic tee, stimulating you more while he leaves wet messy kisses all over your skin. 

He kisses lower and lower, lips now pressing against the top of your breast. You look down at him, the most dreamy expression ever when his eyes meet your framed ones. You look so cute in them, but still the sexist person he'd ever seen in glasses. 

You let out a soft moan feeling his tongue swipe against your nipples, the feeling being foreign after being on such a long dry spell. He licks the stiffened peak again, then sucking it while staring up at you. 

“So pretty,” he whispers on your skin. 

You're soaking at this point, his touch and voice bewitching you. Haechan holds you tight, sucking your nipples softly. His eyes hung low, the stare making you squirm. You watched as his brows furrowed hearing your soft whines, his hand gripping the fabric on your hip. He releases your breast from his mouth with a soft pop, the cold air hitting the wet peak making you shiver. 

“Do you think of me when you touch yourself?”

Your eyes dart to his face, glasses slipping down your nose bit by bit. “I..”

Haechan smirks, his soft lips kissing your chest once again while his hands roam your body. “I know you do,” he whispers. “You're the most obvious person I know.” 

Haechan slips his hands to your lower back, his fingers dipping lower and lower into your shorts. He can't help himself, squeezing the flesh in his hands like a stress ball making you push into his palms more. 

“I want you to show me,” he says, words muffled in your neck while he kisses it. 

“S-show you,” you question.

“I want you to show me what you do when you make yourself feel good,” he adds. “Is that okay?” 

You were intoxicated in your home and he's barely touched you yet, but his voice and eyes did something else to you. You needed more. You nodded, lips parting slightly when he takes his hands out your shorts. 

“Stand up.” 

You remove your leg from his side, removing yourself from his lap. Haechan stood up, body so close to yours you could feel the heat emitting off of him. He tugged at the bottom of his shirt, lips curling into a small smile. “Wanna help?” 

You nodded slowly, hands lifting his shirt above his head. His eyes disappeared behind the fabric but once it was off him, they connected with yours once again, making your core clench around nothing. You tossed his shirt on the floor, eyes trailing down his soft but toned body. You've seen him shirtless plenty of times but this was different. This felt different. 

Haechan's gaze lingered on you as he unhooked his belt, the sound of the metal clinging sending a shiver down your spine. He let them fall, showcasing black underwear to you. Haechan leans down, kissing you softly as he steps out of the pool of fabric, groaning in your mouth softly when your chest touches his. 

“Now,” he says softly, pulling away from you. Taking your hand, he pulls you to the side of your bed, climbing onto the mattress. Haechan plops down, leaning his head on your headboard in the dreamiest way possible. “I need those off” – he points to your shorts – “and you right here.” He pays the spot between his legs. 

Your fingers dig into your waistline, hesitating for what feels like an eternity. Your heart was beating rapidly,  with every second feeling like years. Haechan watched you pull the last piece of decency off your body, soaking in every bit of bare skin he laid his eyes on. He needed to feel you, touch you, eat you. But first he wanted to see you. 

Climbing on the bed, he sensed how anxious you were, wrapping his arms around your body once you settled between his legs. And just like that, you were like putty in his hands, immediately melting in his touch letting him run his hands all over your skin, groping at you wherever he liked. 

“Spread those legs for me pretty,” he said into your ear, smiling when you obeyed. His fingertips trail lines in your hips, soon moving down your legs. He could barely control himself, hands moving closer and closer to your soaked core, the actions making you bring your knees together. 

“Shit,” you mumbled, face hot as you witnessed your glasses fog bit by bit. 

“Do you always wear your glasses during sex” he asked, kissing behind your ear softly. 

“Y-yes, why?”

“I want you to take them off for me.” Haechan laughs to himself softly when you sit up, turning to him with a confused expression. 

“But then I-I can't see,” you say, a slight whine in your voice. 

“I'll do that for you.” Haechan removes the frames from your face gently, folding them and placing them on your lamp table. “I want you to focus on how you feel and what I say. Can you do that for me?” 

His milky tone, the way his lips brushed on your earlobe, his soft touch between your thighs. You'd do anything he asks for in a heartbeat. “Y-yes.” 

“Good girl,” he praises. “You know what to do.”

Haechan watched you start rubbing your clit slowly, biting his lip softly. His hands continued rubbing your thighs, soothing you as you leaned into his chest more. You feel his heavy breathing on your back, your lids going heavy once you insert two fingers inside. 

Haechan was rock solid at the point, watching your fingers move in and out of you, the squelch your pussy made being music to his ears. “Fuck,” he mumbles in your ear.

You clench around your fingers to his voice, the breath tickling your ears making you squirm between him. Your eyes are closed, so you don't see the way he's looking beside you, watching the way your face twitches at every feeling or sound. His stomach flips when you gasp at the sudden feeling his hands on your chest, small moans escaping to the added pleasure. 

“I love that sound,” he says, the sound of your pussy getting louder when you finger yourself faster. 

“S-stop,” you stutter. 

“Are you embarrassed,” he chuckles softly, nipping at your ear, not taking his eyes off the scene between your legs. You gulp and nod, a small whine spilling from your lips. 

“God you're so cute.” Haechan removes one hand off your chest, creeping his fingers back between your legs. “Almost as cute as this pretty clit right here.” 

“H-haechan..” 

He started rubbing small, slow circles, your moans increasing in volume. You kept fingering yourself, but you needed more. You needed his cock, his mouth, his pretty hands. The thought of him finger fucking you till you came stimulated you, making your hips move on their own, grinding against his fingers.

“Tell me what you're thinking about.” He had pressure on his fingers making a whine leave you plump lips. “What do you want from me Y/N?” 

“I..I want you Haechan,” you answer breathlessly. “I want you to make me cum.” Your hand pumps your hole faster, wetness coating your fingers running down your hands. His breath tickles your neck as he begins to grind on you. Eyes closed, head falling back on his shoulder, you let your hips move on their own. You're so close, the feeling of his chest rising on your back aiding to the pleasure throughout your body. 

“I want you inside me,” you moan softly, brows furrowing. 

“How bad,” he teased, a smile on his lips. He rubbed your clit faster, starting to feel your legs shaking. Your moans increased, whines and whimpers freely falling from your lips. He knew you were going to cum. 

“So, so bad,” you whispered. “I-Im gonna cum haechan..” 

“Cum for me,” he whispered. “You're so pretty when you cum.” 

You pumped your fingers harder and faster, the sound of your wet hole filling his ears. You came around your fingers, pussy squeezing tight on the digits inside you. Haechan kept rubbing your clit, the feeling of his fingers on the sensitive bud making you shiver on his shoulder. 

“There you go Y/N,” he said softly, his other hand rubbing your thigh. “Let it out. God, you make the prettiest sounds.” 

You pulled your fingers from between your legs, hand resting on your other thigh as you breathed heavily against his body. That's when you feel his hand take yours, bringing it to his mouth. Haechan wrapped his lips around your fingers, sucking your arousal off your fingers. 

“Haechan,” you whined, hanging your head low in embarrassment. He chuckled, taking your face and turning it to him. He kisses you softly, the taste of your own cum on his lips. “I need you so bad,” you mumbled on his lips. 

“Lay down for me okay?” 

You nodded, lifting yourself from his body, allowing him to move from behind you. You reached for your glasses, putting them on, clearing your blurry vision. When you looked back up, Haechan was pulling his underwear off his body, hard on so big, it hit his stomach. 

“Holy fuck,” you mumbled to yourself. He was big. Bigger than you imagined, and it makes you wonder where he was hiding it all this time under his skinny jeans. 

“Staring isn't very polite, you know.” 

His voice broke your thoughts, making your eyes snap back up to his face. Dark locks of hair fell in his eyes, that same teasing grin on his mouth. He looked like a dream– bruises and bangs on his face, knuckles red, but still hot. He crawled onto the bed, yanking your body lower on the bed by your ankles. 

“You have some condoms,” he said, eyes scanning your naked body. 

“I-In my drawer.” You point to your bedside table, eyes following him as he bends over you to open the drawer. You were practically drooling at this point, the thirstiest you've ever been and it was starting to become too real to be true. Haechan takes an unopened packet from the drawer, shutting it right after. Your eyes don't leave him as he sits back up and opens the plastic, a gulp going down your throat in anticipation. 

“If at any point you wanna stop, just let me know,” he says, sliding the condoms on. Haechan watches your facial expressions and body language. You were excited, he could tell. But you were also the most nervous he's ever seen you. “Listen,” he says softly. His fingertips glide on the inner side of your thighs, hands pushing your legs up by the back of your knees. “I want you to look at me the whole time. Can you do that?” 

The softness in the way he spoke felt a bit unfamiliar to you, you immediately softened nodding at his request. “Y-yeah.”

Haechan licks his lips, lining himself with you. A small gasp fell from your lips feeling his tip stretch you open. He pushed himself in a bit more, watching your face slowly contort silently. Haechan held your legs up to your chest, eyes never leaving the view of his dick disappearing between your legs.

“Fuck,” he sighed, the feeling of your tight pussy almost making him cum right then and there. He looks back up at your face, your eyes are closed, head resting on your pillow. Your glasses are crooked due to the position of your head, but it's sexy to him. 

Haechan starts thrusting in you slowly, eyes shut as he moves taking in the feeling. But you keep looking at him. You keep staring at the way the muscles in his arms slightly flex, you stare at the way his chest moves after every deep breath he takes. He must've known you were staring because he opens his eyes, staring at you fucked out face. 

“Youre.. you're so big,” you mumbled, voice shaky from the pleasure. 

Haechan opens his eyes, staring down at you through his bangs as he thrusted deeper. “Keep saying things like that, and you'll boost my ego.” He snaps his hips into yours, his dick reaching further into you. Haechan speeds up his movements, his hands gripping your legs tighter, pushing them closer to your chest. You tried you best to look at him, but with every movement, you felt your vision go blurry with pleasure. Your moans and whimpers filled the room accompanied with his grunts and the sound of the bed. 

Haechan lets go of your legs, letting himself fall onto your body. He held himself up, one hand on your hip and the other holding himself. You let your eyes close for one second, but Haechan is quick to slap your hip, making you open your eyes. You stare at him, raising your hand and fixing your glasses with your brows furrowed at the feeling of him inside you. 

“Don't look away,” he moans softly. “Keep looking at me..keep those eyes on me.” 

And you did, arms wrapping around his neck to pull him closer. Haechan lets out a small hiss feeling you squeeze around him. 

“Faster,” you moaned shakily, breath tickling his nose. Haechan melts when your face twists in pleasure, brows scrunching with every moment. 

“Fuck, right there,” you whimpers, pulling him closer. Haechan kisses you, you both moaning and grunting into each other's mouths. 

“You like this Y/N? You like when I fuck you good,” he groans, on your mouth.

“Yes, yes.” You nod fast, eyes stuck in his as he plows you into the mattress. The sound of your skin colliding, bed creaking, moans filling the air over stimulated you along with his raspy voice, saying the dirtiest things in your ear. 

He reaches up, removing your glasses from your face and throwing them somewhere on your bed. Too fucked out to even respond, you shut your eyes letting him bury his head in your neck, leaving wet kisses all over your skin. 

“I'm so close,” you moaned, legs starting to shake on either side of him. 

“Cum for me,” he grunts. “I want you to cum around my cock right now.” He reaches down between your bodies, fingers rubbing your clit fast. Haechan has had sex a million times, but nothing could compare to the way you felt squeezing around him. The way your moans rose in pitch when you came, the way you said his name. 

“Haechan,” you whispered, nails pressing into the skin on his back. “Oh my God, fuck..”

He kept fucking you into the mattress, chasing his own high right after yours. “Just a little more baby, fuck..”

You opened your eyes, brows furrowed as you watched his body rise, hands grasping your waist tight. His thumbs pressed into your sides, holding your body close to his while he plowed into you. Even blurry, he was a dream to look at. His hair hung in his face, biting his lip as he chased his orgasm. 

But better get, you looked like an angel underneath him. The sweat on your body, your face, hair, sounds. Perfect. His eyes followed your hand, watching them as one went to your nipple and the other went between your legs. 

“Fuck,” he kissed. The tight feeling in his stomach started getting tighter. Haechan’s jaw dropped, brows scrunched as he came, a strangled moan escaping his throat. 

Haechan stopped thrusting, pulling out of you after a couple of seconds. The both of you sat in the silence of heavy breathing, his hands still on your waist. You reached to grab your glasses, finding them on the blanket and putting them on lazily. That's when you look at Haechan, his blushed  cheeks, sweat on his forehead, trying to catch his breath. 

“Are you-”

“Can we-”

Both of you stop and look at each other. The air starts to feel heavy for some reason, the silence giving you time to think about what you were going to say. Can we go on a date?

You gulped at the way his eyes won't stop staring into yours. His lips part, eyes narrowing when he rubs his thumbs on your sides, soothing your very obvious nerves. 

“Say it,” he says softly, 

“Can we… be more than friends?” 

You blinked, Haechan staring at you with a blank expression. Suddenly he began laughing, hanging his head low after you spoke. 

“What,” you questioned, heart sinking into your stomach. 

“Why did you ask me that,” he chuckled, grinning from ear to ear at you question. 

You swallowed, expression hardening at his words. “Did I say something wrong?” 

Haechan noticed the tremble in your words and immediately stopped laughing, realizing that you were very much serious. Haechan leaned down, his body on yours and head in your neck. He kissed your skin softly, one hand holding him up while the other caressed your skin. 

You watch him, feeling yourself melting into his soft touch. His fingertips dragged along your abdomen, sending chills down your spine. “H-haechan,” you said softly. “Answer my question.”

Instead of answering you, he moved from your neck to your lips. He captured you in a soft, sweet kiss, turned deep and passionate. Something about the way he kisses you at the moment feels romantic, as if he's trying to communicate his feelings without speaking, but you need him to say it. You need him to speak to you.

Haechan pulled away from you, his eyes flickering between your eyes and lips. “Did that answer your question,” he said softly. 

You shook your head, making him laugh softly. “Answer.” 

He smiled, licking his lips before speaking. “I can be whatever you want me to be.”

“Well..” you paused before looking  up at him, eyes staring into his soul. The silence felt like an eternity between you both, but it soon disappeared when you spoke. 

“Can you be mine?”

#nct #nct fanfic #nct smut #nct u #nct x reader #nct oneshot #nct scenarios #nct 127 #nct dream #nct 127 fanfic #nct 127 smut #nct 127 imagines #nct 127 scenarios #nct dream imagines #nct dream smut #nct dream scenarios #nct dream fanfic #nct haechan #haechan #haechan imagines #haechan oneshot #haechan scenarios #haechan smut

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

So, that deja vu fic got me thinking.. and what if katsuki has a childhood friend (obvi friends w deku too) where he is always trying to impress her and class 1-a notices or ( if you’d like them older ) the agency notices and starts betting on when he’ll confess to her. turns out, she actually confesses first and everyone is happy (and slightly disappointed… nobody got their money) 😋😋

Also, when i saw the notification “@cashmoneyyysstuff started following you” i have never hit a follow back button so fast 😭🫶

Remember you’re amazing, take care of yourself, drink water, stay safe, and know that you are loved ❤️

WAAAA @itzjustj-1000 this is soo cute ! especially since katsuki being a loser n tryin to impress us instead of just confessing is honestly adorable. ALSO ALSO ur LITERALLY THE SWEETEST !! ur the loveliest it's a given i had to follow u !! i tried to honour ur request as best i could, i hope you like it ! also say it w me yall: WEEWOOO WEEWOOO CHILDHOODFRIENDS TO LOVERS ALEEEEEERRTTT (yall r forcing my hand atp (not that im complaining tho))

fem reader, katsuki is a whipped little loser, katsuki likes getting praised by reader but acts like he doesn't challenge (fails miserably), kaminari n sero are little shits, m*neta (he doesn't say anything creepy don't worry <3) everyone is in their 2nd year in this one. lemme know if i missed something else !

for as long as izuku midoriya could remember, you and kacchan have always been a packaged deal.

deku remembers all the way back in primary school, how kacchan would bend over backwards to impress you, spending his days trying to win your praise like he was collecting it. whether it be showing off how good his reading skills were, or showing off his newly acquired quirk to you at any given chance. (away from the eyes of the teachers, of course)

or even with silly things. like the time he showed you how long he could hold his breath underwater. it didn't matter, as long as he could show it off to you, he would.

deku remembers how pride would fill his childhood friends face, cheeks practically glowing and a smile basically reaching his ears. a simple "woooah, you're so cool kacchan !" had the boastful blonde giddy for the entire day, chest puffed out as he walked ahead of everyone, with you right next to him, of course. (you were the only one worthy enough to stand by his side after all)

and though he spent his time trying to win your praise, he also needed your attention constantly. katsuki constantly demanded your attention. he's the only one who's allowed to sit next to you in class, you're always the one he picks first when it's time to pick teams to play dodgeball. he's your partner for every project and you're the one who walks beside him when you and your friends go venture out in the woods to go out on your adventures. and even though they would usually take place in the park, katsuki always claimed he'd be the one to protect you if anything were to happen.

as kids, deku was probably the only one who noticed how hard katsuki tried to impress you.

and he's probably the only one to notice how he still does it now.

"sooo...kacchan totally has a thing for yn, agreed ?"

"mhm. definitely."

"yup."

"'m suprised you just noticed that now, kaminari...actually i'm not really suprised." jirou drawled, twirling one of her earphone jacks around her finger.

okay, so apparently he isn't the only one who noticed.

kaminari pouts "i noticed ! i noticed, like, ages ago !" he huffs into his folded elbows on the desk " i just wanted to see if you guys did !"

"you'd be stupid to miss it." sero cuts in smoothly. their grouchy homeroom teacher somehow ended up absent, leading to an impromptu free period. which in turn caused for loads of gossip he had somehow gotten roped into. kirishima, kaminari and sero were talking about you and katsuki, happily chatting off about something they couldn't hear from where they were sitting.

"maaaannn, bakugou's way too lucky, scoring such a pretty girl. what's he got that i don't ?!" kaminari whines. kirishima shushes him lightly, afraid to rouse the attention of a certain blonde they just so happened to be talking about

"now that i think about it.." sero wondered, leaning onto kirishima's shoulder "midoriya, you guys are childhood friends, right ? have they always been..." he cuts himself off, pointing over at you both with his chin for midoriya to look back. ".. like that ?"

you're chatting about something that's apparently funny or exciting, with katsuki listening along attentively, his head resting in his palm like he's admiring you. his full focus entirely on you, as it usually was.

you're using your hands a lot while you're talking and deku recognizes it as the thing you do when you've gotten to the juicy part of the conversation, deku almost wishes he could listen in, then remembers it's not good to be nosy and shakes the thought away. every once in a while katsuki interjects with a subtle smirk on his face and his remarks have you either giggling or playfully pouting at him unable to hide your smile. the playfulness in his heavy lidded red eyes remains at any reaction you give him, though. kacchan's worked on his poker face over the years but it seems he can't control himself when it comes to you.

izuku realizes he's been openly staring for too long and quickly turns back to look at sero who raises an eyebrow, awaiting a response.

izuku chuckles to himself "yeah, pretty much." he hums, playing around with the ends of his tie as he speaks.

"oooouu~" kaminari sings, suddenly lifting his head up from where it was hidden into his shoulder with a sudden burst of energy, startling kirishima. "juicy details about kacchan, i'm in !"

"i don't know if it's exactly 'juicy'" izuku sweatdropped, chuckling awkwardly. "but kacchan and yn have always been really close. when we were younger, kacchan would always be seeking out yn's attention. he'd be really possesive..or protective over her, i guess ?—it was all pretty harmless though." he recounted, smiling softly at his childhood memories nostalgically pouring into his mind.

both kirishima and sero let out quiet hums when he finishes while denki simply pouts "s'not as juicy as i thought it would be" he huffs petulantly, receiving a knock on his head from jirou who hisses a "he told you that, idiot"

kirishima places his head into the palm of his hands and sighs dreamingly "man, that's so cute. bakugou's been a major softie for yn for so long.." he clenches his fist and izuku thinks he sees a little tear in his eye "so manly !" he exclaims through his sharp teeth.

"yeah, i don't know if 'manly' is the word i'd use to describe someone who's been whipped for so long and still doesn't have the balls to confess" sero ribbed, snickering to himself with denki joining in shortly after.

"hey, don't be assholes !" jirou shot "i think it's kinda cute y'know ? not really..manly..but—cute." she said.

"how much you wanna bet he's not gonna confess until graduation?" kaminari challenged.

"wouldn't put it past 'im." a voice suddenly chimes in. the five of them all turn their heads left, right then down at the voice that came from none other than mineta, who had somehow wormed his way into the conversation.

"and what the hell do you think you're doing sneaking into our conversation, freak" jirou sneers, glaring down at mineta who had already dragged his chair over, including himself into the group.

mineta decides to ignore jirou as he places his arms onto the desk seriously like he's imitating some type of mafia don. " bakugou's never gonna confess any time soon, he's too much of a pussy" he waves off nonchalantly "i bet he won't even have done it by the time we've finished school ! "

" and i bet you wouldn't say that to his face !" kaminari guffaws and the purple haired boy sputters. izuku can't hold back his grin as he watches them bicker.

" kacchan's always been pretty..sure of himself" he settles "i don't think it'd take him that long to confess" he guessed, pressing his thumb onto his chin "though maybe the fact that he's so sure of himself could hold him back.."

ah, there he goes again.. the rest of them thought as they watch midoriya babble on and on into theory land.

denki suddenly slams his fists on the desks, startling everyone. he sucks in a breath "alright ! i bet a thousand yen and the entirety of my lunch box that bakugou won't confess by the end of this year !" he exclaims, not too loud but loud enough so everyone in the group could hear him.

"oooouu~ what're we betting on ?" mina chimes in, suddenly appearing behing jirou and in turn startling her. she flashes her a little glare causing the pink haired girl to offer a weak apology and a hug.

"kaminari just bet a thousand yen and his lunch that bakugou won't confess to yn by the end of this year" sero smirked, clearly enjoying the drama

" ou, that sounds fun ! lemme join in too !" the pink skinned girl pleaded giving her best puppy eye and pout combo.

"sure ! just don't come cryin' to me when you lose" kaminari agrees, playfully jabbing at his friend.

"this is so stupid. i'm not betting money on this.."jirou scoffs rubbing at her temple. "c'moooonnn, don't be chicken, jirou ! " denki whines

"mhmm, c'moonn jirou give into peer pressure !" mina joins in, wrapping her arms around the purple haired girl and swaying her side to side.

jirou groans before finally conceding "..five hundred yen. that's all you're getting from me." she concludes sourly crossing her arms.

" i'm gonna go with kaminari's and say his balls won't drop 'till graduation" sero says simply, smirking almost mischieviously at the display of sudden chaos. he looks a little too pleased, izuku sweatdrops.

"i'm not betting on my bro, that's so unmanly." kirishima refused " i say just let them go at their own pace" he finishes, receiving a nasty look from his chaotic classmates.

needless to say kirishima gave in to peer pressure soon after, offering a modest 1,100 yen by this summer for his friend to confess.

"well i stand on what i said, i don't think he has the balls to say it at all. and i put that on all the money in my pockets ! " mineta proudly spoke.

"how much is that, like, one fruit roll-up ?" mina deadpanned, not missing a beat causing the group to erupt in laughter. mineta's objection's falling on deaf ears.

meanwhile, katsuki notices you've stopped talking all of a sudden. it takes him by surprise as you were so into it a minute ago. "what's up ?" he asks. his question snaps you out of your trance and you jump slightly, turning back to look at him "oh , nothing ! they just seem to be having fun " you gasp, a smile crawling up on your face as you look back at your friends having a good time.

katsuki on the other hand has a slight pout forming on his face, displeased at how his loud mouthed friends distracted you from your conversation. and from him he thinks, but that makes him feel like a snot nosed little kid again and his expression turns even more sour.

"tch. the fuck are those losers so loud for" he grumbles under his breath. you catch it though, and you giggle. his eyes brighten and his brows unfurrow the slightest bit when he hears it.

"don't be such a buzzkill katsu, s'not their fault you're no fun." you jest, chuckling to yourself when he scowls at you.

"fuck off ! m'not a buzzkill" he rolls his eyes, huffing indignantly "an' i'm plenty of fun" he finishes grumpily. you laugh a little more, covering your mouth with your hand when you catch a peak of him narrowing his eyes at you making fun of him. he simply rolls his eyes and sighs, shaking his head. he'll let it slide, he always does with you.

"right, right. my apologies, sir dynamight" you chuckle, bowing slightly at him, he huffs out a laugh "that's sir lord explosion murder god dynamight to you" he snorts. you throw your head back and laugh and katsuki feels the same pride he used to feel when he'd found something cool to show you back when you were brats. his stomach feels fuzzy and his head feels clouded the way it used to when you'd offer him your big, bright sparkly eyes and a "you're so cool kacchan !"

god, it never failed to remind him how much of a whipped loser he was for you.

and unfortunately still is.

you scoot your chair a little closer to his and katsuki has to use all of his might not to blush at the sudden proximity, as miniscule as the distance between you both was to begin with.

"well okay then, sir lord explosion murder god dynamight" you say rapidly, laughing to yourself. katsuki let's out a breathy chuckle, it's cute. he's cute. " i'm sure it doesn't mean much, but i at least think you’re plenty fun to be around"

katsuki feels his heart skip a beat too many.

you whisper, like it's a secret. you're in your own little corner while all your classmates are chatting away yet you say this to him like it's something between you and him. batting your eyelashes up at him. god, it's like you're out to kill him and honestly katsuki thinks for a second he wouldn't mind dying by your hand.

he's such a whipped loser.

he can't think straight. you're sitting so close to him, you're lips are glossy from that lip gloss you always have on you. you smell nice, katsuki feels like a creep for smelling you like you aren't a breath away from him.

"yeah, well.." he utters lowly. he licks his lips, feeling himself grow dizzy as he watches you watch the movement intensely and swallows. his adam's apple bobs and he can feel himself blushing like an idiot. " i don't think you're all that bad either" the end of his sentence comes out a little breathy, he barely realizes he's speaking. like his body is deciding for him, he doesn't mind much.

you give him a sweet little smile and your eyes shine like stars and you look up at him like he's everything, like he's the coolest. he wants you to look at him like this all the time.

you suddenly lean in and kiss him, right next to his lips, just at the corner. it lasts for about 0.3 seconds but katsuki feel his entire body exploding from the inside like he's let off his quirk onto himself.

"i take it back actually" you start "you're super cool to be around, kacchan." you whisper bashfully. katsuki huffs out a little laugh once his heart had stabilized itself a little bit, a small smile growing on his face—

" AW MAN? WHAT THE HELL ?!"

you both turn to the sound of your electric classmate, sporting a little pout on his face. proceeding to get dog-piled on by your other classmates surrounding him, causing him to let out whines and moans of complaint.

"i-ignore him !" mina waves off nervously "just keep doin' what you were doin !— i mean, we weren't watching or anything !" she splutters.

"nice one." jirou deadpanned sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "look, we don't mean to pry or anything, but who kissed who first ?"

at that, katsuki's cheeks flare up, turning a damn near violent shade of pink. he's about to yell obscenties at his classmates, about to tell them it's none of their business when-

" i did !" you giggle, a cat-like grin on your face

"you sneaky fuckin minx-" katsuki growls, shoving his index fingers into your sides and you let out a squeal mixed with a giggle. you're quickly drowned out by your classmates releasing a group groan, with sero and kaminari yelling and booing at katsuki, who in turn starts threathing them, his hands crackling and popping.

you don't exactly know what's happening, but you can't help but feel extremely joyful and happy.

"soo.." mineta starts "since i said bakugou wouldn't confess first doesn't that technically mean i-"

" IN YOUR DREAMS ! "

#i wrote this at lightning speed cus this was genuinely so fun to write #i loved this #hope the ending isnt dookie yall im sorry innever know how to end my shit LMFAOO #not proofread but will fix later ! #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugo fluff #bakugou imagine #katsuki bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x reader #katsuki x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugou katuski x reader #bakugou fluff #katsuki x you #katsuki x y/n #bakugou drabble #bakugou x you #bakugou x y/n #bakugo x female reader #bakugo x reader #bakugo x you #bakugo x y/n

[taexoxosgf]

ACROSS THE ROOM

PAIRING idol!mark lee x idol fem!reader

WORDS 6.4k

SYNOPSIS You were just so beautiful.  The type of beauty that seemed unattainable.  The type of visual Mark would never approach because he concluded that there are already a million people at your feet. 

WARNINGS both are hot (yes, this needs a warning), fluff if you squint (rlly hard), smut, vaginal fingering, oral sex (male & fem receiving), unprotected sex, rough sex, multiple orgasms, missionary, doggy, slight hair pulling

NOTES repost. my old account is gone because i’m the dumbest bitch on earth.

February.

It had been two years since your group debuted.  The award show season had just concluded and one idol group would host a party to celebrate all the hard work throughout the year.  

You practically lived at the company at this point.  Eating, sleeping, and spending all your breaks there.  SM Entertainment has strict schedules regarding breaks and recovery time which has you constantly feeling as if you’re doing one thing after another.  

Idols would rarely have any time for themselves or to let loose.  Between the busy schedules and performances, there was scarcely any time for family or friends. 

It’s only been two years, and you applaud other groups in the same company who have been slaving away for the past few years.  But that was the price for fame and riches.  Maybe it is worth it to some people.  It was for you.

The art of music and dance was all you loved since you were a little girl.  Performing for your family or school talent shows, your love for music never fizzled out as it did with some individuals.  It could happen in the future, you think.  You’re still early in your career, so you hope to become more optimistic; content with what you have. 

This year, the group that was hosts is NCT. Groups from big companies such as  HYBE, JYP, YG, etc. were in attendance.  Since it was a rare occurrence, the boys split the cost of the mansion. It was such a brilliant idea to do this, you thought. There were so many of them, and it probably didn’t even make a dent in their bank accounts.  It was a small price to pay so idols could freely interact without the pressure of cameras, and old friends could reunite.  

Even though your group was in the same company as many of the artists, it was difficult to have time for conversations due to busy schedules and different practice areas. And it was almost impossible to run into each other at the company due to its vast size. The possibility, if you could guess, would be about five percent.  If artists of the same company rarely saw each other, imagine how difficult it would be for artists from different companies to be companions or friends.  

It was easier to become acquaintances to friends if two idol groups had overlapping comebacks.  Music Bank, Show Champion, M! Countdown, etc. gave a lot of free time in between to hop over to different waiting rooms to converse with your colleagues. Your group was especially close with G-idle, showcasing false surprises every time your comebacks would be in the same time frame. 

Your close friend, Soyeon, stands beside you, her right hand holding a red solo cup.  

“So you never hang out with guys, and you haven’t fucked a guy since last year?” 

“Nope, I don’t intend to tonight. And you know how hard it is to hang out with idols of the opposite gender. ”

Her hands soothingly rub against the sides of your arms. “No, no, no. I’m not having any of that tonight. When do we get a chance to roam free? No judgment, but this dry spell is getting out of hand.”

You scoff at your friend before continuing, “Unnie, these are basically our coworkers, I don’t know.”  

She rolls her eyes at you before standing in front of you, face-to-face, “Oh come on, don’t be a buzzkill babe.  So you’re telling me you don’t think anyone is attractive in this house full of hot people?” 

Her question causes you to scan around the room and outside the backyard.  Your eyes halt for a split second, but continue scanning around, pretending it never happened.  

“Oh, I saw that,” she points at you.  “There is a guy you wanna fuck!” 

Throwing your arms down in a huff of disapproval, you’re about to give in to Soyeon’s frenzy.  “Girl, could you be any fucking louder?” 

“You better tell me now, I caught you bitch,” she playfully slaps your arm.  

You bite your lip slightly, contemplating revealing who it is.  Looking up at her, she’s staring at you with anticipation. Her eyes grow wider by the second and you’re not surprised when you’re giving into her puppy dog eyes.  

Your hands fall on her shoulders as you close in on the space between the two of you. “Mark,” you whisper.

“Oh my god!” 

You wince. 

“I fucking knew it! I always thought you guys would look hot together.” 

“What? You thought about this before?” 

“Maybe. But that’s not the point.  I swear I saw him eye you, and only you when you guys got here!” she’s already jumping and pushing you to the backyard before you can get another word out.  

You try your fucking hardest to push back against her, but it’s no use.  Her drunk ass is already overpowering you.  

Mark is beside the pool playing with some of his members and others from different groups.  Tossing the ping-pong, the millisecond has him hoping it can make it into the red cup charged with alcohol.  

“Fuck,” his failure causes him to throw his head back. 

“You fucking suck, I’m three cups from winning bitch!” Yeonjun yells from across the foldable table.  

His success in the third remaining cup has him rejoicing, and he daps up his teammates.  

“Now give the ball to Sunwoo.  He’ll land it at the house next door,” Mark retorts. 

“Aw, you’re about to lose, so you’re talking out of your ass.” 

“You’re so drunk, you know that?” Mark laughs, ignoring his friends' behavior.   He’s stepping away to let the following person use their turn. 

He’s looking around at all the people at the house.  This was the one night of the year he looked forward to.  Just friends having fun and letting loose, no cameras, no one to judge or inspect his every move or facial expressions.  

He spots you and Soyeon against the glass sliding doors.  You look so fucking hot.  Your top accentuated the curve of your waist so well, and he noticed the mini skirt on your body rides up a little more every time he steals a glance at you.  The top you wore showed the perfect amount of cleavage and your perky breasts are on display for everyone to see.  He wants to be the only one to see them fully. He wants to be the only one to see you naked in front of him.  

Oh, how he would love to fuck you. He couldn’t help it. You look so delicious standing there, with your pouty lips and doe-like eyes.  Your perfect body and silky hair.

To be honest, he noticed you at the company and could never work up the courage to start a conversation with you.  News flash: this has literally never happened to him before.  It was never difficult to speak confidently to anyone until you.  His extroverted personality suddenly does a one-eighty whenever he contemplates approaching you.   

You were just so beautiful.  The type of beauty that seemed unattainable.  The type of visual Mark would never approach because he concluded that there are already a million people at your feet. 

He recalls the few times he passed you in the halls and you politely bowed.  Or when your recording sessions would overlap slightly, and he would hear your voice in the studio.  Or when he passed by you in those tight clothes that barely covered your body practicing with your group. 

Mark couldn’t lie, you were the most attractive out of all of them.  He personally thinks, no one could compare, but he has yet to discover what you’re really like.  Not the personality you convey on-screen.  

This only happens once a year.  It was an opening for him to finally converse with you.  The company, media, or fans wouldn’t have a clue about it.  There would be no confession to them, the perfect chance to shoot his shot.  The only thing holding him back would be rejection.  At this point, the opportunity is too tempting to ignore as soon as he spots Soyeon pulling you outside the home. 

This is so embarrassing.

You and Mark make eye contact as Soyeon drags you out the door.  He doesn’t pretend to look away.  

“Come on! Move!” 

“No! Oh my god! Stop!”

Soyeon finally stops with the physical force, and you both stare at each other.  Her eyes move from your eyes to his, another way of telling you to get on with it. 

“Think about it, this is the one day of the year where you’ll really get the chance, and with no judgment. Or sneaking around,” she adds in the last part, hoping you would miss it.  And you definitely didn’t. 

She’s stern on her point, supporting it over and over again with more reasons.  The persuasion is working, you think.  And now, you’re seriously contemplating it. What’s the harm? Rejection? Embarrassment? You don’t even know if he wants you. 

But maybe she’s right. You’ll most likely never run into him after today, and if you do, it probably won’t be until the same time next year. 

“I don’t want to hear for months after today what could’ve been.  You’ll spend so much time regretting it.  I know you better than yourself,” Soyeon adds further. 

Her words finally fuel your courage to make a move.  “Okay, just give me a second to build some confidence, meditate, or something,” you’re shutting your eyes to soothe the nervousness away. 

“Mhm, but maybe make it fast. Hot guy my twelve o’clock, coming your way. You’ll thank me later!” she quickly warns you as she pecks you on the cheek before making her way out of your line of sight.

There is no time for you to process what’s happening, or to prepare after she utters her last words. 

Turning around, Mark is already directly in front of you, your eyes align with his chest and it takes all of you to meet his eyes.  

“You don’t seem too happy to see me.” 

He was so fine.  You just wanted to stare at him. No matter how weird that sounded.

He’s scanning your entire form, taking a moment to drink in your appearance as you respond.  “I don’t have any emotions towards you.  We’ve never formally met.”

“Formally?  Did we cross paths at a time I didn’t know about?” The ice clinks against the cup as Mark raises it to sip and his Adam's apple bobs in a thick swallow. 

“I don’t know.  Maybe you know the answer,” you’re habitually pulling your body towards him.  The scent of his cologne laced with weed fills your nostrils and you already feel the warmth of his body radiating off him. You just can’t help it.  You wanted him so badly, so badly that you didn’t second guess your obvious signals. 

“You’re acting a little too dumb, saying words before thinking them through,” the false confidence is oozing from your voice as you speak. Okay.  Maybe you’re drunk and you didn’t know it.  If that’s the case, you won’t stop any time soon. 

“What do you mean I’m acting dumb?” he follows his response with a chuckle at your assumption. 

“You approached me as if we knew each other, then suddenly, you’ve never seen me before?” 

“You’ve got it all wrong baby,” the pet name catches you off guard, but it rolls off his tongue like velvet.  “We’ve never met, but I’ve noticed you.” 

“Notice me? Elaborate,” you wanted to have him explain.  Maybe he wanted you as much as you wanted him. You had to be sure.  No embarrassment or rejection today, you exclaim to yourself.  But you couldn’t jinx it.  

“You’re the one I’ve been waiting to see tonight.”  

“So you didn’t see me come in earlier?” your orbs follow your index and middle fingers as they walk up his chest. Your fingers stop finally looking at him straight in the eyes, “I call bullshit.” 

“I did,” he glances at your hand on his chest before returning to you. “Just was waiting til’ I got you all to myself.” 

‘Well… wish fulfilled… So, what is it that you hoped to see me for?” 

He looks at you differently, and what you didn’t know was he’s contemplating saying the whole and honest truth or the version that wouldn’t scare your on-screen persona away.  The innocent, dainty, girl that would break if you press too hard.  But up until now, Mark only knew of that girl.  

“Hey, Markie!” Yeonjun walks up from behind Mark, obviously drunk.  He’s stumbling around, anchoring himself by putting a hand on Mark’s shoulder.  “I see your buzyyys” he slurs while directing his attention to you. 

“You’re really so so hot, Y/n.  If yous torn Markie here, down, I’m alayz here,” his hooded eyes scream drunk.  “Hyung, don’t put that away!” he yells to someone behind you.  

You’re turning towards the home to find the person he’s addressing, but he’s suddenly stumbling past you, unintentionally pushing you backward. 

You’re off-balanced and as you close your eyes to prepare for impact, it never comes, and you feel an arm wrap around your waist, preventing you from practically eating shit.

Mark's arms are around your waist, sending a scowl back at Yeonjun before directing his attention back to you.

"As I was saying.” 

You gaze up at him, your chest now pressed against his. 

“What I hope to see you for?”

“Go on.” 

Mark doesn’t know what comes over him suddenly, but he’s thinking he should just rip it off like a bandaid because it’s all or nothing. 

“Is to have me in between your legs, and you screaming my name.” 

“I’d like to see you try,” your eyes move down to his lips.  It was so tempting to just pounce on him right here, right now.  

It was clear that you both wanted each other as much as the other did.  The game you always played with men every so often got you what you wanted, but this time, with Mark, it was almost impossible to keep playing. 

Mark doesn’t respond verbally.  Instead, he takes his hand to move the hair sheathing your ear.  You think he’s about to whisper something, but he begins kissing your neck, trailing down from your earlobe. 

“Is that what you like to do? Test people?” his lips are against your ear and you’re caught off guard, doing everything in your power to hold back a moan. 

“Yeah, that’s what I want,” you respond softly, eyes shut.  

“Be careful what you wish for.  It might come true,” he brings his face to yours, and your lips are practically two inches apart.  The buzzing in your body doesn’t stop and you’re scolding yourself for wanting to give in so easily.  

You notice him biting his lip, content with the effect he has on you. 

You lick your lips, “And what if I want it to?” 

“You’re all bark no bite baby.” 

“If you want me to bite, I will.” 

“I have yet to see otherwise,” he whispers against your ear, lip grazing your lobe. Mark doesn’t follow with another word but your impatience and the alcohol coursing through your veins forces you to make the decision. 

You close the distance between you two, connecting your lips with his.  It was so sudden, but he kisses you back almost immediately, squeezing your waist harder and the other hand instinctively goes to your cheek. 

You forget about the world around you, and that people are basically watching you begin to make out with Mark in the middle of the backyard.  But the built-up lust makes everyone disappear. You’re both in your own world, with no other thought in your consciousness. 

You don’t know what Mark is thinking, but he’s in the same boat as you.  He wanted you for so long, and now he finally has you. Following that thought, he doesn’t know what he did in his past life to deserve this, but he must have saved an entire country to be able to receive what he’s experiencing now.  

You’re kissing more roughly now, your arms around his neck as he gropes your entire body.  Your hands snake up into his hair, and you find yourself pulling his locks as it becomes more intense.  When his hand snakes down to your ass, he squeezes, which earns a gasp from you.  

Mark takes this opportunity to slip his tongue into yours.  Your mouths fit each other perfectly, and you question if the other people you made out with in the past were real, because it has never felt this good before.  

After a while, you’re pulling back, Mark struggling to pull himself away from you. 

“Easy there,” your forehead is still against his, eyes on his lips. 

“You’re so fucking hot,” he husks against your mouth. 

Both of your chests are rising and falling at a rapid pace, not realizing you needed to catch your breaths. 

“Upstairs, the second door, on your left,” the words roll off his tongue without hesitation. 

You’re mutually agreeing, you, with a nod as you slowly part, and your fingers run off his, until the tip of the nail.  It’s so hard to control yourself and act as if nothing had just happened.  

Of course, people were looking.  Some were whispering to each other, the others smirking, and finally, the one’s with a scowl on their faces as they watched each one walk away from the other.  

You’re in the room sitting at the edge of the bed as you wait for Mark.  You had just sat down and looked around the room.  It’s clean and smells husky, but you can tell someone was staying here due to the small duffel bag and clothing scattered across the floor. 

And you definitely couldn’t lie, you are so nervous.  What would Mark be like in bed? Rough, dominant, gentle, or maybe submissive?  It had been so long since you had sex, it felt as if you were a virgin all over again.  

You’re amidst your own thoughts when you hear the click of the door.  The door doesn’t open carefully, but it’s practically slammed open.  Mark doesn’t look back as he closes the door behind him, not even stopping for a single second.  The moment he sees you, he’s grabbing your face and smashes your lips against each other.  It’s too fast, all of it happening in one motion.  

You’re stumbling back until the back of your leg hits the edge of the bed, forcing you to sit back on it. But Mark’s lips don’t leave yours, following you and pushing you slowly until your back hits the mattress. His arms cage your body with his knee between your legs.  You feel Mark grab behind the bend of your leg to wrap around his torso while your lips are still attached;  Intertwining in perfect harmony.  

The buzzing all around your body only seems to grow stronger as he becomes more aggressive.  It was like he was so hungry that he couldn’t stop even if someone walked into the room right this instant.  You couldn’t lie, it would probably turn you on more.  

Mark couldn’t help it, you were just so insatiable, like a drug that he couldn’t get enough of.  Like a drug, he could take over and over, without getting sick.  He wanted all of you so badly, but only if you were willing to give yourself to him.  

The more you dive deeper into Mark, the more he sucks you in, and the more you want him. 

The makeout is unforgiving, animalistic almost. “So sweet,” he murmurs against your mouth.  It feels too good to open your eyes to him.  Your panties are already sticky and if this continues, you’d have to throw them away.  

You’re biting your lip as Mark’s lips leave yours to trail kisses down your neck.  He’s careful not to leave hickeys as he already knows that your makeup artists would be unforgiving.  

But Mark continues to trace kisses down your body, pulling down your skirt and practically tearing off your underwear in one motion. He’s kissing all around except where you need him the most and it makes you whine.  

“Tell me you want it,” this statement has you looking down and locking eyes with him. 

“Mark, just get on with it.”

“Try again,” at that, he presses circles at your clit without a warning. It’s slow, the pad of his thumb easing over your bud.  But it’s too slow, and you need more.  

“Mark, Please.  I want you,” you mewl, giving in to his demand. The one action already having you fall apart right under his fingertips.  Before you know it, you’re instinctively moving your body closer to him, the eagerness exemplifying the level of want when you’re clenching around nothing. 

“Yeah?” you don’t see it but the smirk he exudes at your greenlight is much more than subtle.  “Don’t have a smart-ass comment now?” 

Before you can retort, he’s diving head first, licking a stripe up your slit.  It’s a satisfying feeling, a gasp threatening to spill from your lips as the feeling of arousal becomes stronger.  

He’s continuing, knowing exactly how to turn you on, knowing exactly how to touch your body, and how to make your eyes roll back.  His hands roughly push against the sides of your thigh to prevent you from moving out of place and the dim lights aren’t a hurdle as Mark finds your clit and gives it a sharp suck.  It’s just the beginning as he continues slurping and sucking in all the right places, unforgiving as he gives you the best head of your life.  Your eyes feel as if they're going to fall out of their sockets at the perfect pressure and pace. 

“Fuuu-ck,” it’s stretched out, the same word combining with a previous moan that threatened to come out from the back of your throat.  

“You’re so wet,” he rasps against your cunt. “So fucking messy.” 

“Mark, don’t stop!” 

What you didn’t know is Mark loved giving head.  He didn’t need to receive anything in return.  Knowing he made his partner cum turns him on beyond belief.  Making you squirm and moan his name like a mantra has him instinctively rutting his crotch against the mattress.  

You didn’t know he was this good.  It’s as if you and he have done this a hundred times before.  You’re absolutely drenched, your arousal mixed with his saliva drips down your core.  But a mess was the last thing you and Mark worried about.  

“Mark, I need more,” you squirm beneath him, your voice sounding already fucked out.

“Is that a demand?” he’s teasing, inserting only his middle finger while awaiting your obedience. 

A small gasp leaves your lips before you utter a plea, “Holy shit, Mark, please.” You’re practically whining at this point while your temper and impatience becomes all too consuming. 

“That’s better,” he adds his ring finger, adding to the fullness and earning another gasp from you. 

“Damn.  Thinking about your face when you cum is already making me so hard,” he groans against your cunt and continues to slowly grind his erection against the mattress with no embarrassment.  You were already fucked out, but you could see him from your peripheral view, and if it wasn’t the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, you don’t know what is.  

Mark’s watching your expressions as he slowly pulls his fingers out before plunging them back in.  He doesn’t let up as the slow motion suddenly speeds up, and he has you moaning and squirming underneath him. 

He suddenly sucks on your clit in sync with the rhythm of his fingers and your eyes practically roll into your head.  “Mark, Mark,” you shout as your thighs begin to quiver and you’re arching your back at the gratifying overstimulation.  

"I-I’m gonna cum," your words are barely audible, mingled with gasps and groans, but Mark attentively listens, hearing every sound that emanates from you.  He doesn't stop and keeps going in the same motions, only rougher and faster. It's not until he curls his fingers inside you that he finally reaches the sweet spot. 

Your orgasm hits you all at once, tears threaten to spill down the sides of your face as the band in your lower abdomen inevitably snaps, and your entire body shakes.  Mark sucks and slurps on your clit as if nothing happened, and you're virtually screaming.  The obscene sounds fill the room and don't halt until you beg him to stop and he notices the cum gushing out of your body painting his fingers and dripping down your cunt.  

“Fuck,” you’re spent, and it’s all solely from Mark’s tongue and fingers.  You haven’t even seen his dick yet, and it already tops all the other people you’ve decided to waste your nights with. 

“Done already?” The words are like butter, right before he licks another stripe up our sensitive core. “Well, I’m not done with you,” you quiver as he carefully drops the straps of your top, and then, brings the fabric over your head.  Your senses seem to be on overdrive today, and you can’t get enough.   

Mark's large hands glide from the inside to the outside of your thighs, merely to define the contour of your hips and waist, stopping to frame your breasts, and slowly begins circling your nipples, as if he read your thoughts.  “Feel good?” 

“Mhm,” the high from one of the best orgasms you’ve ever had begins to finally come down and you notice the lips that hover right above you. Before another thought, your arm hooks around his neck to pull him down onto your lips.  

He welcomes the kiss, mouth moving languidly with yours.  Both of your bodies melt into each other as the serene moment becomes all too comfortable.  His hand continues to press circles on your nipple as the other gently rubs against your waist, eventually moving down to your inner thigh, in an attempt to soothe your spent body. The push and pull of your lips continues on for a few moments before it becomes faster.  Mark bites down on your lower lip, but you whimper at the action because of the overwhelming sensitivity.  

At your whimper, he lets go to lick over your bottom lip as an expression of remorse.  You’re so overwhelmed, it's only now that you remember his very big problem.  It’s poking at your hip, and he lets you know he notices your revelation by experimentally pressing his erection against your center. This causes you to lock eyes with him, another smirk adorning his perfect face.  

Mark’s cockiness only instigates you to unhook the arm around his neck and move down to cup his erection.  You don’t even look down, staring up at him as you palm him through his pants.  “You just love playing games don’t you,” but the shaky exhale he withdraws notifies you of the facade.

“Only if you’re playing,” your hooded eyes and bottom lip trapped in between your teeth say much more.  The seductiveness of your tone only pulls Mark closer to you, him getting lost in every single sense. 

Mark decides at this very moment he's too impatient to withhold any longer.  He's had enough.  Enough of your doe eyes staring at him as if nothing else matters.  Enough with the melodious responses that exit your pretty lips. Enough of the temptation that you are. He's willing to obey every demand, no matter the cost. He thinks that even though you two hardly know each other, it's as if you've done this a hundred times before.

He is already withdrawing from your body to remove his clothing in front of you. The warmth is missed, but now you’re just sitting there in awe, because what the fuck.  The large t-shirt he always wore hid his delicious arms and oh so, thin waist. Mark’s towering over you and it’s difficult not to gawk at his figure.  The boxers that hug his hips are pulled down, revealing his big cock.  You knew it was more than average when feeling the imprint on his pants, but you almost drool at the sight in front of you.  

“Like what you see?” he’s emitting the same look, with the corner of his lip tugging up in return for your reactions.  

You don't say a thing, instead groaning at his languid movements, legs spread open, upper body propped up with your arms. You continue to watch as he puts his hand over his cock and gently strokes it.  Mark bites his lower lip to keep a groan at bay after stroking a little quicker.  Watching him fuck himself turned you on belief and it should be embarrassing but the sight was basically straight out of a porn video.  

“Let me help you out,” patience was never your strong suit, and the ogling only lasts a few moments before you’re on all fours, inching to the edge of the bed where Mark stands.  He lets you, removing his hand before you lick a long stripe up from the base of his cock, then slightly sucking the tip. A smile threatens to come about as Mark twitches at your action.  

“Stop teasing before I fuck you senseless against the wall,” he huffs, throwing his head back. Mark was so close to just pulling you off and using you if you let him.  You seemed to be taking your precious time, but he was slightly worried he would come embarrassingly fast if you were the one in control here.  Anything you did, he seemed to fall apart so easily.  Right into the palm of your hand. 

The warning was one that seemed like a reward to you, but you regress, pushing him into your mouth in one motion.  Immediately gagging, the tip hits the back of your throat fast.  It barely fits inside your mouth, and you find yourself using your hand to make up for the remainder.  “Shit, that’s it,” he groans at the vibration from your throat as his praise makes you moan, imagining his cock in your pussy later.

You can feel every ridge of his cock in your mouth, hollowing your cheeks, sucking and moving back and forth.  He was so big, and the more you took of him, the more sounds came from Mark. It only urged you on further, sucking and bobbing like your life depended on it.

You’re squeezing your thighs together to aid the ache as the sound of the glide of your tongue against his cock is the only thing filling the air in the bedroom.  It seems to be the final straw when he uses his hand to twist your hair and pull you off his cock.  “Fuck, enough.  I’m gonna cum if you keep going.” 

You use the back of your hand to wipe off the corners of your mouth before Mark guides you onto your back with his hand still wrapped around your hair, the same hand resting on the back of your head. He's hanging over you once more, and the warmth you longed for returns.  Your legs are already spread open, wanting to cure the clenching of nothing in between your legs. 

“Are you sure you want this?” he’s biting his lip as he politely runs the hand originally entangled in your hair to push away the ones in front of your face.  

“Want you so bad,” your words combine with a whimper because he’s running his cock back and forth over your sensitive folds, collecting as much cum as possible.  

He offers a polite smile before he pushes in. It’s slow, but Mark’s size was far from normal, at least, far from what you’re used to. You feel so full and you both gasp at the contact, a grunt coming from him.  “Oh my fucking god,” you almost choke on your words, your mouth forming an ‘o’ shape as you adjust to his size.  Mark grunts against your ear at your pussy swallowing his dick.  If he were to die right now, this is what he guesses heaven would feel like.  

“Fuck,” he tests the waters by grinding his hips against you, and it already has your back arching.  “You’re so fucking tight,” his hands return to your waist, the arch of your back forced back onto the mattress. His hands are sure to leave bruises, but you couldn’t give a care in the world.   Every single movement and drag of his cock against your walls is ecstasy, the delicious burn fueling the awaiting high. “You’re such a good girl. Taking me so well,” he murmurs. 

“Mark, please move.” 

“So needy,” he rolls his hips against you once more, while his pelvis is against you, “Your wish is my command,” before pulling back and diving back into your heat.  “Oh,” a moan escapes your lips at the action. Your eyes are barely open, but those hooded eyes are focused on the Greek god in front of you.  You stare at the strained muscles all along his back, his whole body flexing with every movement.  

He’s repeating the same pull and push of his hips until there's a consistent pace, every stroke earning more sounds from you. The grip he has on you becomes tighter as he begins speeding up his thrusts.  

You’re practically sobbing at the way Mark burrows his cock inside you, fucking you so that you can’t walk the next day.  It’s so rough, breasts and body jolting with every movement, and you’re searching for stability by bringing your legs around his waist. You love it rough.  Wanting him to use you, use you in any way he wanted. Mark suddenly pulls out almost completely before brutally hitting the spot inside you where you need him the most.  

“H-holy shit, Mark.”

He’s so lost in the pleasure, the lewd sounds of his balls slapping against your ass and the feel of your pussy choking his cock like a vice makes it almost painful to hold back his moans. It’s an impossible task though, with you in front of him lost in pleasure, tits bouncing in front of his face with the pretty sounds coming from you.  Mark is too close.  Embarrassingly close.  He wants to prolong this as long as possible because he can’t seem to ever get enough.  

“You’re not the sweet, innocent girl everyone thinks you are, are you?” he spits and you’re too fucked out to decipher his words.  “W-what,” your words combine with a moan because you yourself feel the forming of another orgasm in your lower abdomen and attempt to meet his thrusts halfway to reach euphoria. Tears are threatening to fall, makeup smeared, but you don’t give a care in the world as Mark continues.  

“You act like an innocent school girl who’s gonna break if she receives one insult,” he scoffs.  “But you’re not,” before he can finish his string of words, he’s pulling his cock out of you to turn you around onto your stomach.  You yelp at the action before you feel his arm hook around your waist, bringing you up to your knees. 

 “You’re dirty, walking around in clothing that barely covers your body, so what? So you can get fucked?” you gasp as Mark plunges his cock back inside from behind, the new angle making you squirm. He has his lip caught between his teeth as he continues with the pace he exercised prior. 

“Mark I-i’ll come,” you're dropping to your elbows after your arms give out. It seems as if Mark is in the same boat as you when his thrusts become faster and more aggressive; if that’s even possible.  Your brain feels like a puddle of mush, the band threatening to snap again.  

“You got what you wanted,” he leans down to hover against your ear with his chin against your nape, not stopping the addictive pace of his thrusts.  “But you got it all wrong.” 

“Mark d-don’t stop! Fuck!” 

He brings his arm back below you and pinches your clit.  "From now on, I'm the only one who gets to fuck you. Got it?" You're not sure if it's the hazy words that come out of his mouth or the way he explores your body, but you're at the point where you'll do anything to get to the goal given that your legs are shaking. You’re so close, and you want it so fucking bad.  

“Yes! Fuck yes!” 

“So good.  Come for me, baby,” He rasps, unable to hide how fucked out he is. With a few more thrusts from Mark, the coil finally snaps and your entire body convulses underneath him. He keeps going even after this, pursuing his high and intensifying the orgasm. You're shaking and sobbing, and it's spreading throughout your body, beginning in your lower belly and progressing throughout.  It’s consuming you completely, the addicting high turning your body into a mass of nothing. A moan threatens to escape from your throat, but to no avail, not a single sound comes about.  

"Holy shit, so fucking tight," your pussy spasms around his cock, making it difficult for Mark to move, but it's enough for him to reach his, cum painting your walls as he rides out both of your peaks; Your cum and his mix together as it drips down your body. 

You feel your entire body collapse back onto the mattress as you come down, and your consciousness battles with the idea of sleep as it wanders. 

 Not soon after, it finally gives in.  

The intense rays of the sun through the drapes forces you awake, eyelids fluttering at the intrusion.  You rub your eyes before opening them, and after a few moments, you realize that this isn't your room, and memories from the night before resurface.  While twisting your body around to the opposing side, a small smile appears on your lips.  

Mark is fast asleep beneath the sheets, his features serene.  You simply want to continue watching him sleep with no expression on his face because he's simply, well, gorgeous.  But you quickly second-guess yourself and determine that, yes, this is a little weird, therefore getting up to use the restroom to distract yourself was the best decision.  

Before your feet can touch the cold floor, a hand wraps around your wrist and pulls you back to your original position.  Except, this time, Mark’s arms are wrapped around your entire figure, his chin resting against the crown of your head. 

"Let's just stay like this for a little while," he declares, lids remaining closed. 

You melt against him, with a small laugh pervading the room, and say, "Okay." 

Soon after, you're both falling asleep once more, bodies entangled like they were the night before, but for a completely different reason. 

#nct 127 #nct u #nct dream #nct #nct smut #nct hard thoughts #nct x reader #nct x y/n #nct x you #mark lee #lee mark #nct mark #nct mark lee #mark lee smut #mark smut #mark lee x reader #mark lee x you #mark lee x y/n #mark lee fluff #mark lee fanfic #nct fluff #nct fanfic #nct ff #nct fic #nct fic recs #nct female oc #nct mark x reader #nct mark smut #nct mark fluff #lee minhyung

[moonsgemini]

cinnamon girl - rafe cameron

summary: hating rafe cameron was easy to do when you were both teenagers, but after years a part and time spent thinking about one another one thing leads to another. Secret rendezvous between kook prince and kook princess ensue, finding any spare minute to be with each other without the judgey eyes of outer banks.

warnings: 18+, minors dni, fem reader, she/her, p in v, praise kink, semi public sex (a bunch of people are downstairs), fingering, oral f receiving, dirty talk, sneaking around, secret relationship, cussing, alcohol, enemies to lovers kinda

wc: 3.5k

an: another smutty smut. I have had this in my drafts for a bit & I just needed to finish it. It started out as being inspired by cinnamon girl by lana but I like don’t know what happened. also two posts in one day ???? who am I.

masterlist

In high school when y/n read Romeo and Juliet she fell in love with the tragic romance. She was astounded that love could be so intense and passionate. So much so that they were sneaking around behind everyone’s backs and the miscommunication ultimately leading to their deaths.

When she was sixteen she met Rafe Cameron. When her father introduced her to the tall blonde she didn’t think he would eventually be her Romeo. Especially not since he didn’t even smile or show the slightest interest in her. Their fathers had recently worked on a business deal together and had got along so well they wanted their families to get together.

She knew who he was and what he was like. Rumors run rampant on the figure eight. He constantly had snarky comments and remarks to make at her. Whether it be about her outfit, her likes, and especially about the boys she dated. y/n would be talking to Sarah about the boy she just went on a date with and Rafe would butt in with his two cents. He was a year older than her and he always made sure to act like he knew better because he was older.

“Fabian? You do know he like has dated half the cheer and volleyball teams,” Rafe scoffed as he stood in front of her and Sarah who were sat on the pool chairs outside. He had overheard y/n talking about the new guy she was seeing and Rafe couldn’t believe who the guy was. He also couldn’t believe she was dating at all.

Y/n looked at him with a glare, “I don’t remember asking for your input.”

“You could really use it though. Seems like you’re pretty fucking clueless at the fact that you’re a lot better than that asshole,” He rolled his eyes annoyed at the fact she couldn’t see how this escapade will end in heart break. He was only looking out for her so he doesn’t understand why she was so annoyed.

She chuckled bitterly, “Yeah like you care, besides I can find out for myself Rafe. I don’t need you telling me what’s good for me or not.”

Rafe rolled his eye because to him he did know what was good for her and Fabian was not. “Well when he ends up hurting you I’ll be ready to tell you I told you so,” He smirked taking a sip of his beer and walking away.

Sarah scoffed muttering, “Hate him.”

Y/n sighed watching him walk away and talk to her dad, “Couldn’t agree with you more.”

The first few years she knew Rafe she hated him. As much as you could hate him. He had always been extremely handsome, something she definitely noticed, and as he got older he became even hotter. In front of her parents he was charming and they interpreted his cocky demeanor as confidence. Whenever she complained about the Cameron boy being a prick they said they liked that Rafe knew what he wanted and always went for it, something that y/n could learn from him.

After she went away to college these family dinners became much smaller with only the parents and younger siblings. The kids having grown up and gone their own ways. Rafe was always on the mainland taking care of his dad’s business. Sarah had gone off to college so it was practically an empty nest. Occasionally during holiday breaks Sarah and y/n would join them for game night or dinner but Rafe still wasn’t around much.

She couldn’t lie and say he didn’t swim in her thoughts every now and then. Okay maybe more often then she’d like. Especially when he’d post on instagram and his bright smile would infect her mind on the nights she couldn’t fall asleep. She wondered if he ever thought about her but she doubted it since they never liked each other.

Rafe thought about her every day. Whenever he’d see her dad he’d find a way to bring her into conversation. He knew she was coming back soon and he made a note in his calendar to free his schedule on family dinner day because he wanted to see her. He needed to see her. Even if she probably didn’t want to see him because he remembers her hatred for him when they were teenagers. It makes a smirk appear on his lips as he thought about y/n rolling her eyes and sending witty comebacks his way.

-

It was winter break of her junior year of college when she made if back to the outer banks.

Y/n was surprised to see him drinking a glass of scotch with her dad and Ward as she walked downstairs. Her family was hosting dinner that time. Her first thought when she spotted hime was person he was even more handsome. His boyish look almost completely gone now that he was a man. She noticed he had been working out because his chest and shoulders seemed broader. Could have even gotten taller?

“Hey there she is,” Ward said as she made it all the way down the steps.

She smiled politely and joked, “Here I am, hope you didn’t miss me too much.”

Rafe smirked taking a sip from his glass. After Ward asked her more questions about college and the internship she was starting on the mainland that following summer. She could feel Rafe’s eyes on her as she talked to his dad. Seeing him had felt different that time. There was something different in the air.

During dinner they both stole glances at each other. Sometimes when she’d catch him staring at her he wouldn’t look away. Locking his eyes with her smirking and sipping on his second glass of scotch. His long fingers wrapped around the glass grabbed her attention. She watched his adams apple bob as he swallowed. No guys she knew in college drank scotch, because none of them were men like him.

He couldn’t believe how much more beautiful she had gotten in the last three years. She was a woman now and she held herself with so much more confidence than when she was seventeen. Rafe liked that.

“Oh honey give Rafe a tour of the new wine cellar. It is so magnificent our architect is amazing, maybe you’ll like him for a new Cameron employee,” Y/n’s mom said to the young adults who had been eye fucking for the last forty minutes. Y/n’s mom had been feeling her second glass of wine now which led to her being all giddy and generous. It’s always what her mom did. So whenever they went to charity events her mom just needed a glass of wine to sign a check for $10,000.

She was also an avid wine collector so for the last year they had been building a wine cellar under the house. It turned out beautiful. All wood and the lighting was moody. There were racks of wines all around the room and a few in the middle creating ailse. There were also a few big wooden support beams.

“Sure mom. Follow me,” Y/n said nodding her head towards the back. He smirked standing up and following her a few paces behind so he could stare at her back side. She led him out to the side of the house where the entrance was. If her mom knew what she ultimately helped happen she’d kill the both of them. Mostly for committing such a sin next to her most prized possessions.

Ten minutes into the tour Rafe had y/n pinned against one of those wooden beams. Her legs wrapped around his waist with her hands in his hair tugging whenever he’d hit that spot she could never reach on her own. No college guy she had been with was ever able to hit that spot either. Their breaths mixed together as their faces were close together, y/n’s skirt bunched around her waist. One of his hands was under her shirt tweaking her nipple.

His dick inside of her smoothly sliding in and out as he fucked her. Rafe knew he would never forget this moment. Never forget just how wet she had been, all the noises she was making sounding heavenly.

The first time was erotic. Years of built up sexual tension was finally getting released and it felt so good. His hands, his lips, his body felt better than she could ever have imagined.

When they were done Rafe kissed her, lips slotting naturally with her like they always belonged there. She was worried it was a one time thing but he wasn’t acting like it. That bubble of anxiety in her chest popping as he continued to be sweet to her. He had slowly pulled out and set her down gently. Tugging her skirt back down and helping her step into her panties he had tugged off in a frenzy. He fixed himself as she fixed her hair and makeup.

“That’s not the last time that’s gonna happen,” He said breaking the silence, “I like you too much to let you go.”

-

Since the first night they hooked up they have been sneaking around behind their families backs seeing each other. Rafe flew and road tripped to her apartment more times that winter and spring than he can count. When she came back for the summer he was practically living at her house. He’d sneak in at night like they were teenagers and he’d sleep over or stay up talking with her until she fell asleep then he’d sneak out. Or sometimes (a lot of times) they’d be doing something else that involved rafe’s mouth on her.

When y/n got her internship he’d meet her for lunch. They’d hangout in secluded areas on the beach and whenever they wanted to have a nice date night they’d stay a few cities over for the weekend to be alone and be a couple in public. For her birthday Rafe took her to the Amalfi coast for a few days where they spent most of the time on a boat, in a pool, or in bed having amazing sex. Y/n told her parents she was going to the lake for the weekend where she’d barely have service. Somehow they believed it.

They kept it a secret not because their families would be upset. It’s the opposite actually, they’d be too excited. Then there would be all this pressure on their relationship. The mom’s and Ward would be urging Rafe to propose because their families merging would make them look incredibly good and powerful in the developing industry. They’d want a huge wedding with a bunch of people they don’t know. There’d start to be talk about grand babies. All of figure eight would be talking about the kook prince and princess dating and on their way to live off their trusts. It would just be too much.

It was the last dinner party of the summer and Y/n was giddy. She hadn’t seen Rafe in two weeks because he had gone away on a business trip with his dad and then she had gone on to see her grandparents in New York. It was the most time they had spent a part in the last four months.

Tonight would be the last night they see each other for another couple weeks while y/n moves into her senior year apartment and settles into school. Rafe knew how important school was to her so he wanted to give her space to settle which she was grateful for because pre law was not easy. It would also be too suspicious if he randomly showed up to help while her parents are there.

This was a big dinner party so it was perfect. Y/n’s parents were hosting so it was all perfect. Every big family on Figure Eight, even the ones who only summer there, was at her house. The house was filled with many distractions since her mother also loved collecting art. No one would see them sneak upstairs to her room, especially with all the wine that’s being consumed.

Rafe had been dreaming about touching her since he last saw her. Oh and when he saw her he didn’t even waste a moment. As soon as he saw an opportunity to drag her upstairs to her bedroom he did. It was when appetizers were brought out and everyone had gathered outside. Y/n smirked the whole time knowing he wanted her as bad as she wanted him. Her short dress definitely did the job it was supposed to when she spotted his hard on when he first grabbed her.

His eagerness showing when he practically slammed her against the inside of the bedroom door. His lips on hers with fervor. They moved expertly against each other. Immediately finding their rhythm, no matter how many times they have each other it’s never enough.

His hands sliding down her waist and slowly going under her sundress. That’s when he feels nothing. She wasn’t wearing any panties. He instantly got harder and groaned into her mouth.

“You’re so fucking sexy,” He mumbled as he began trailing kisses down her neck.

Her hands tugged at his hair, “I missed you Rafey,” she whined not even feeling the slightest bit embarrassed about her eagerness. She had missed him so much.

He began walking her towards the bed. His lips still latching onto any exposed skin on her chest. They kicked their shoes off in the process, Rafe undid a few more buttons of his shirt. His tanned broad chest making her breathing uneven. When her knees hit the end of the bed she sat back crawling backwards towards the pillows. He followed her his knees spreading her legs.

“I missed you baby,” He gently cupped her face and stroked her cheek softly, “I can’t wait to make you cum.”

The soft gesture with the dirty words made her cheeks feel hot. That devilish smirk appearing on Rafe’s face like he knew that would happen. And that’s because he did know. Rafe knew her body and he knows just what to do to make her squirm. He looked too hot for her to even care how dirty he sounded. Sometimes she’d shy away but other times it made her putty in his hands. Y/n reached forward kissing him not so gently. They’d have time for the lovey dovey stuff later.

He began kissing down her body. Her chin then her neck, paying attention to that spot that made her hips jerk up for relief. His hand were gliding up her legs pushing her dress up around her waist in the process.

Rafe kissed her shoulders as he pushed her straps down in a teasing manor. He kissed her collarbones then her chest. Finally moving to her stomach and her pelvic bone. Oh had he missed this. His hands moved to her knees spreading her legs wider.

Y/n’s hands were in his hair already tugging. Giving an even harder tug when he reach forward giving her a teasing lick. She had to cover her mouth with one hand to not be loud.

Rafe wanted to tease her but he just couldn’t resist. He dove right in. His tongue finding her clit immediately, moving his tongue in circles. He alternated between that and licking down her slit. Tongue teasing her entrance. It was all so euphoric.

Her back arched off her bed. Y/n tried her best to keep quiet but a few moans slipped out. She hoped the chatter and music playing downstairs was enough to cover her noises. Rafe hummed against her core making the feeling even more intense.

“Oh god Rafey,” She sighed dreamily, “I missed your mouth. Know just what to do.”

He lives for the praise. It boosted his ego and encouraged him to do better and outdo himself. Hearing her breathy wins and moans muffled by her own hand were making him impossibly hard.

As he sucked and licked her clit he reached around and abruptly slipped a finger into her wet center. Her thighs practically suffocating him as he moved in and out of her touching that perfect spot inside of her. He always made her cum and he always did it fast. Before she met Rafe she had only ever finished with her own hand or vibrator.

“I’m gonna cum!” She whisper shouted.

Rafe moaned, “Cum for me baby.”

It felt like electricity was going through her body as she came. His movements relentless until he knew she was satisfied. He began to slow down as she came down, leaving her with one final lick. He kissed the inside of her thighs softly before crawling up to her again. She pulled him forward needing his lips on hers. She moaned at her taste on his tongue.

“I need to be inside you,” Rafe groaned as he felt one of her hands reach down and palm him through his pants.

“Please fuck me,” She batted her eyelashes at him knowing it always got her what she wanted.

He groaned again before sitting back on his feet so he can unbutton the rest of his shirt. Y/n sat up pulling her dress all the way off. Rafe made quick work of his pants pulling them down his legs.

His member slapped against his stomach, her mouth watering at the sight. Rafe was created with care, everything about him was perfect to her. He grabbed his length pumping it a few times before he rubbed his tip through her folds. Spreading her wetness around, his eyes rolled back at the feeling.

“Oh please please put it in,” She whined, “I need you so bad Rafey.”

“Baby your wish is my command,” He smirked and thrusted into her slowly pushing in inch by inch.

“Yes yes yes yes,” She chanted in pure bliss. Y/n didn’t care how desperate she sounded.

Rafe sighed as he began moving slowly. She was so tight and warm, even better than he remembered. He knew he wasn’t going to last long but he would make sure she came again before he did at all. He hit that spot inside of her that made her eye’s roll back and toes curl.

“Taking me so good my love,” Rafe encouraged as he picked up speed.

He grabbed one of her boobs and brushed his thumb over her hardened nipple. He leaned down and placed the other one in his mouth sucking and licking gently. All of the stimulation had her body feeling like it was on fire. He released it with a pop and went back to capture her lips in his. Y/n’a hands gripped his hair and clawed his back

“I’m gonna cum babe,” She moaned, “Yes right there, oh oh god.”

“Yeah baby cum for me,” He sighed, “Fuck I’m gonna cum too.”

Her eyes rolled back at his words, “Please cum in me, fill me up please please,” she blubbered feeling overwhelmed by the orgasm that was about to take over her body. The sounds of his deck sliding in and out of her wet pussy made him reach the edge. Everything about her was so sexy from the noises she made to the way she looked sprawled out below him.

Her words made him pick up his pace pounding into her. He felt her clench around him knowing she was coming. She moaned and scratched his back as she came. Biting her lip to not let anymore loud noises slip out of her. He came inside of her with a groan. Rafe continued to pump in and out of her slowing down as he came down from his high.

He swore he could cum again just looking at her all fucked out. Her hair all over the place, lipstick smudged and probably all over his face.

After a few minutes of catching their breaths Rafe pulled out gently. A whine leaving her lips at the empty feeling. Rafe got up going to her bathroom to get a towel to clean her up. When he came back he dabbed her center cleaning up.

“I missed you so much Rafe,” Y/n said breaking the silence.

He leaned forward kissing her knee, “I missed you more my love.”

“You think anyone heard?”

He shrugged, “Don’t think so. If they did then oops.”

She laughed, “Don’t say that Rafe, then we will get caught.”

He smirked as he laid next to her again opening his arms as an invitation that she gladly took. Resting her head on his chest and he leg wrapped around his waist. One of his hands stroking her hair and the other rubbing up and down her body slowly feeling all her exposed skin.

“Lets lay a few minutes then get back to hearing my dad talk about business for hours,” Y/n said savoring the feeling of laying with him.

“I love you,” He kissed the crown of her head a few times.

She smiled, “I love you. Sneak over tonight?” She asked looking up at him hopefully.

“Read my mind,” He smirked.

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x reader #rafe fic #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron series #rafe cameron fanfic #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron x fem!reader #rafe cameron x kook!reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron x female reader

[whateversawesome]

Some Theories about Anya's Name

Who would have thought a short chapter would bring so much information and discussion? But then again, we're talking about Anya, agent of chaos (according to her papa).

After that chapter, there's plenty of theories flying around, so I decided to make this post to compile, explain and expand these theories 😉

Ready?

Anya is an acronym: This one is pretty clear has been a popular general theory. It means that the letters of her name stand for something else. What exactly? We don't know yet, but it probably has to do with Project Apple and the infamous lab Anya was created.

Anya...Ania...OstANIA: If you live near small children, you probably know that when they are learning how to talk, they do it by picking up words adults say and many times they say those words wrong. While discussing with some friends, I imagined those scientists constantly saying the word Ostania in front of that little girl. Maybe baby Anya thought that was her name because she heard the word OstANIA all the time, but she couldn't say it right.

Anya, the foreign princess: This one is very simple. It means that her name was spelled differently in her country of origin. This theory is vague, but I do believe a third country could be involved in all this mess. Also, it would make sense for Anya to be hiding in Ostania, if she was born and kept captive in a different country.

Anya...A N/A: This one is one of the most interesting theories! A N/A would mean something like "Non-applicable". You probably think this doesn't say much, but it really does. In the first few chapters of the story we learned that Anya was adopted and returned 4 times. Instead of a child, she was returned as if she was a piece of clothing. Even though it's been barely mentioned, we've also learned that people that participated in Project Apple didn't treat the subjects nicely (see how they treated Bond). Those people called Anya "subject 007". They didn't even give her a name. If we think about it, Anya is very "non-applicable". She was created in a lab, she has a strange power, so she's not like the other kids, she's been adopted and returned 4 times...

The A N/A and Anya being treated like an object instead of a human being fits the Spy x Family premise of the story, which is: Humans like Twilight, Yor, and Anya are used as weapons instead of being treated like humans. The story is about them regaining their humanity through love and family.

So even if A N/A says nothing about Anya, it says a lot about the story.

Look at this little girl. This illustration was heartbreaking. Do you know when it takes place? It's right before he meets Twilight. We see that it's the same filthy orphanage Twilight visited on chapter 1 and this is not Anya's first orphanage, so that means this illustration happened after she was returned again. The way she's facing the door, her body language, the way she holds Mr. Chimera by the hand is so sad. Here she is, once again, in a place she doesn't want to be, where nobody will take care of her...alone 😭

Enough of that or we'll end up crying...🤧

Some other things to take into consideration about her name:

Mr. Chimera: Since this is a visual story, that panel of Mr. Chimera tells us that this plushie is involved in Anya's name. If you've read certain fic, you know where I stand on that. In this case, I think that yes, the person who helped Anya escape gave Mr. Chimera to her. However, I don't think it was exactly that character (you know who). It probably was someone else, maybe even a new character we don't know yet. It could also be a scientist who took pity on Anya or disagreed with the use of children as lab rats, and helped her escape. We don't know yet.

Twilight: One of the most beautiful panels on that short chapter was seeing Anya's eyes lit up when her papa told her the correct spelling of her name. Did you see it? Those were the eyes of someone who had just learned something new about herself and by doing this, Twilight made her even more human.

One more thing...I've seen speculations about the next arc of the manga being about Anya's past because of this short mission. In my opinion...I don't think it'll happen yet. Why? If it was the case, this would have been a longer chapter and the actual beginning of the arc.

I believe Anya's past will be one of the last things we learn, because there's plenty of things to resolve and a lot of information we don't have. Stories are like puzzles; this chapter was an important piece, but we're not working on that part yet.

#spy x family #spy x family manga #spy x family meta #spy x family theory #anya forger #sxf #twiyor #loid forger #yor forger

[apclyptc]

DUMB— chris sturniolo x reader

synopsis: reader is smart and top of her class in college. chris however, is not too interested in her intelligence.

warnings: full on smut, swearing and also drinking/smoking, use of the pet name baby, use of the word slut, dumbification, oral (f! receiving), unprotected sex

“hit her from the back she can’t do nothing but yell,

and she smart as fuck i got this bitch straight out of yale”

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

Ever since you were younger, you seemed to have a gift for memorising and holding information. Because of this, people assumed you studied constantly.

Obviously, you did study. But it wasn’t like you didn’t have a social life. You enjoyed college parties like any other person would.

So when a guy in your class invited you to his frat house for a party, of course you didn’t refuse.

The only thing was, this guy just happened to be Chris.

He was in your social studies class, usually sat at the very back with a couple of his friends in the lecture. You knew of each other, having shared mutual friends from other classes. You’d never really spoken to him one-to-one, mainly because he was always socialising with pretty much everyone, and while you weren’t shy, you also weren’t a huge fan of jumping into conversations with people who all knew each other prior.

It also didn’t help that Chris was the most attractive man you had seen in college, or maybe in your life.

You were good at hiding it, but he made you nervous. Of course, when he invited you to his fraternity house, you faked an air of confidence so you didn’t weird him out.

“Hey, it’s Y/N, right?” Chris began, and when you affirmed with a nod he continued, “I’m throwing a party tonight, you should come.” He threw a smile in your direction, and you pushed down the immediate feeling of giddiness before answering.

“Yeah sure, sounds good. When does it start?” You asked nonchalantly as you could.

“Around 10. You can come whenever, it will be on way into the morning anyway.”

“Great. Am I good to bring a couple friends?” You replied, not wanting to walk into a party alone.

“Yeah that’s fine with me. Ask your friend Lola, my buddy Nate has a thing for her. Just don’t tell him I told you that.” He smirked at you.

That smirk. You wished you could see that smirk while he was hovering over you as he sla—

“Lola, yeah! I’ll bring her along with me.” You snapped out of your less than decent reverie and gave Chris a response.

“Perfect. I’ll see you there, Y/N.” He gave a quick glance up and down your body before turning and walking away from you.

It was then you realised, you had absolutely nothing to wear. Plus, since Chris just personally asked you, you decided you may as well dress as hot as possible.

Y/N: hey lola, frat party tonight?

Lola: do u even have to ask??? usually it’s me dragging u to these things

Y/N: true lmao. i’m gonna need to borrow something from ur closet

Lola: ooooh why, do u need smth slutty?

Y/N: maybe

maybe i was personally invited by the party thrower

Lola: who

Y/N: chris 😇

Lola: GIRL-

ok ok i’ll give u the sluttiest thing i can find

come over later and we can pick something out for u

A couple of hours later once you were finished at college, you headed to your best friend Lola’s dorm.

You two had spent what seemed like hours choosing each other’s outfits.

“By the way, a little birdie told me that Nate has a thing for you.” You eyed Lola up, knowing she had a soft spot for him.

“Oh, really? That’s interesting. Totally unrelated but would you still happen to have that box of condoms I gave you for secret santa last year?” Lola gave you a suggestive look, raising her eyebrows.

“Of course. Already put two in my bag.” You both laughed.

You arrived at the party at 11:27, mainly because no one turns up to a party on time, but also because Lola took a ridiculous amount of time to get ready.

You met up with a couple of girls from the dorms opposite Lola, seeing as they were also invited.

As soon as you arrived, you were immediately shown to the kitchen where an array of bottles were displayed.

Vodka, whiskey, rum, tequila and practically any spirit you could think of, were decorated around the kitchen.

You grabbed two cups, one for you and Lola, and filled it with vodka and soda.

“Hey, I think I see Nate and Chris over there.” Lola points behind you through to the games room, where lo and behold, Nate and Chris were playing what looked like an intense game of beer pong.

The two of you walked over to them, Nate noticing you first.

“Hey! Come help me win the game, Lola.” He gestured for her to play with him.

Chris had then turned around to see you, that smirk appearing yet again.

“You gonna help me?”

You took a quick swig of the contents in your cup before joining Chris at the table.

“Atta girl. Nice of you to bring Lola for my bro.” He spoke in a low voice so that only you could hear.

“Chris, stop flirting and throw the damn ball.” Nate teased, and you felt your cheeks grow red.

Chris threw the ball into the cup closest to him, the object landing into the beer and making a splash.

“Drink up, fool.” he glanced at you to make sure you were watching.

After a while, you had enough to drink to give you a confidence boost, and were now invested in the game of beer pong.

It was down to one cup each, and you had to make the final shot.

“Come on, Y/N,” Chris spoke from behind you, “you got it.”

It was too hard to concentrate with his voice so close to your ear, and his body so close to yours. You threw the ball, but it narrowly missed the cup.

“Yes! Chris you’re a loser!” Nate laughed at his best friend across from the table, throwing his arm around Lola who had locked eyes with you as he did this.

‘Don’t forget the condom’, you mouthed to her playfully, and she winked, pointing to her pocket.

Nate and Lola had then disappeared together, leaving you alone with Chris.

“Sorry I missed the cup.” You joked.

“Apology accepted. You wanna smoke with me?” He pulled out a perfectly rolled joint from his pocket.

You weren’t a huge smoker, only joining with Lola occasionally when you felt like unwinding.

Nevertheless you agreed, deciding you may as well since you were at a party.

Chris lead you upstairs into his room. Your eyes immediately glanced around the room, taking in its appearance.

Chris sat on the edge of his bed, and you followed.

“Could you get my lighter, it’s in the top drawer over there.” He pointed to the bedside table at the wall, and you grabbed the device, passing it to him which he thanked you for.

“Lola and Nate seem to hit it off.” You spoke.

Chris held the joint between his lips, lighting it before replying, “he’s down bad for her. Has been for a while.”

You giggled to yourself, knowing Lola felt the same about him. It was a good feeling for you, because you knew Nate was a nice guy.

“They’re a good match. Nate’s a good guy for her." You responded, watching Chris take the first hit of weed and exhaling the thick smoke.

“Yeah? Is that what you’re into? Nice guys?” He asked you, taking another hit before passing it to you.

You took the joint from his hand and inhaled.

“I guess. I think I prefer someone more… unpredictable.” You had Chris in mind as you answered. You had yet to figure out why he invited you here himself, since you didn’t know each other that well.

“In what way?”

“I don’t know, someone I can’t figure out. I like to be kept on my feet, someone like Nate is easy to understand because he’s straightforward. Which is great for Lola, she deserves someone who is like that.” You thought about all the past few guys Lola had a thing with. They weren’t that nice.

You passed the joint back to Chris who had his eyes trained on you as you spoke.

“So you like the tension, not knowing when or if someone wants you.” He tried to understand.

“Yeah. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice when it’s easy. But..” You trailed off.

“It’s more fun not to know.” Chris finished your trail of thought as if he knew the feeling.

“Exactly.”

A comfortable silence sat between you, passing the joint back and forth until it was gone.

“I have a question.” You asked, breaking the silence.

Chris tapped the joint out on his bedside table, and brought his attention back to you, “Go ahead.”

“Why did you invite me here? I mean, it’s not that I didn’t want to come, it’s just that we haven’t really talked much.” You asked, needing to know.

Chris chuckled.

“I thought it was more fun not to know?” He smirked, using your own logic against you.

“Come on! Tell me.” You persisted.

Chris leaned in closer to you, and you could swear your heart was beating out of your chest.

“I always see you in class,” He began to explain, continuing to close the gap between you, “sitting close to the front, answering all the questions. You’re pretty smart, aren’t you?”

The tension was palpable, and you felt yourself grow wetter as his low voice penetrated your ears.

“I want an answer.” He demanded.

“I- I guess so.” Your voice wavered, all of a sudden finding it hard to speak.

“I’ve always wanted to see how long it takes until I can make you speechless.”

And it surely didn’t take long, because in moments his lips were on yours.

It was as if every guy you had dated never existed, the feeling of Chris kissing you overrode any experience you had thus far.

His left hand rested on the back of your neck while his other hand took the opportunity to roam around your body, from your thighs to your chest, until it landed on your waist.

Your hands swiftly made their way to his arm and hair, while deepening the kiss he had started.

In a quick movement he lifted you onto his lap, letting both his hands find purchase on your waist.

With your arms wrapped around his neck, you slowly moved your hips rhythmically, earning a soft grunt from him.

Pulling away, he spoke, “You want to do this?”

You nodded, before asking the same of him.

“Do you?”

That same smirk that sent you reeling reappeared again.

“Does this answer your question?” He grinded his hips upwards into you, allowing you to feel his growing hard-on.

A whine escaped from your lips.

“No more talking.”

You reconnected your lips to his, the energy of the room turning into heated passion.

Chris’ hands slowly dragged down to your ass, kneading them with roughness.

You whined again, unable to stop any sounds from leaving your mouth.

The sound of the ongoing party downstairs could be faintly heard from inside the room, but you paid it no mind. You couldn’t, not while Chris had all his attention on you.

He briefly paused to take off the top you were wearing, and then resumed with his skilled tongue, sliding against yours. He took you off his lap, not separating from you for a moment as he laid you down on your back.

“Such a smart girl in class,” he pulled his shirt over his head and threw it behind him, “Does anyone know that you’re really just a little slut?” He kissed your neck, then your jaw.

“I need an answer.” Chris demanded again, and you rubbed your thighs together in want.

“No.” You breathed.

“No, what?” His hand glided up your thigh, separating them.

“I’m not a slut.” You managed to find words.

“So if I reach in between your legs, right now, you won’t be dripping for me?”

You knew you were.

A hand snaked through your skirt, pulling aside your underwear, and he slowly dragged a finger down your pussy.

“I’ve barely touched you. Do you want me to? Want me to touch you right here?” His finger, coated in your slickness, inched its way inside, just enough for you to feel it, but not enough to satisfy you.

You bucked your hips up, trying to feel something, anything.

But Chris pulled his hand away, causing you to whine in frustration.

Luckily for you, he wanted to feel you so badly, he couldn’t tease you for long. He grabbed the hem of your skirt, pulling it down your legs and threw it in the same direction as his shirt.

“I want to hear you. You love opening that mouth when we’re in class.” And with that, he pulled your underwear aside and attached his mouth straight to your throbbing clit.

All you could do was moan and writhe in his bed as he delved into your wet cunt, licking up all the arousal like a starved man.

Your hands flew to his hair, tugging on it desperately. The vibrations from the groan that left his mouth sent waves of pleasure tearing through your body.

Chris’ hands dug into the flesh of your thighs as they instinctively tried to close around his head.

“Fuck, right there!” You moaned loudly as his tongue dove inside your hole.

One of his hands left your thigh and drew circles on your clit, causing you to arch your back at the white-hot pleasure you felt from his ministrations.

Chris could feel his dick pulsate through his pants at the sounds you were making. He needed to feel you.

“You want me to fuck you, huh? Fill you up good?” He asked, and you knew by now he wanted an answer.

“Please, please, please.” Were the only words you could muster, too high on the feeling Chris had given you with his mouth.

He wasted no time on giving you what you were begging for, quickly discarding his pants and boxers, along with your bra and soaked panties.

Lining himself up with your entrance, he slid his dick over the slick of your pussy and pushed the tip in.

Your eyes had shut in anticipation, but when he made no attempt to move you opened your eyes to look at him.

He had waited until you made eye contact with him before pushing his entire dick inside you.

You both moaned at the full feeling, your walls contracting around him.

After a few seconds, Chris began to move.

Thrusting in and out at a slow pace as if to torture you, he shuddered, revelling in the feeling of your tight cunt.

“Fuck, feels so good baby.” You whined at the pet name, bringing his face down so you could kiss him again.

He started picking up the pace after this, your tongues smashing together in absolute need.

“Faster, faster.” You babbled, drunk off the sensation of his cock piston in and out of you.

“Yeah? You want me to fuck you dumb?” He grunted, loving how you could barely string full sentences together.

“Yes, yes, please. Need you deeper.”

The dirty words spilling from your mouth caused him to moan, and he flipped you onto all fours.

“Wanna see that pretty little ass bounce while I fuck you.” He muttered as he entered you yet again.

His pace was relentless, his balls slapping against you from the way he was pounding deep inside you.

You were just making sounds as you tried to say “Harder, faster, more,” but the words couldn’t form properly.

“The slut wants more? Can’t even speak but you’re begging for more?” He taunted you from behind.

You felt a sharp slap on your ass, followed by a soothing rub directly after. You practically yelled as Chris’ hand came down, your cunt convulsing.

“Knew you’d like that,” he slapped your cheek again, “Can feel you squeezing around me.”

You could feel the knot in your stomach unraveling, and you knew you wouldn’t last longer.

“Chris, gonna cum.” You managed to speak between moans.

“Come on baby, need you to cum while I’m inside you.” He groaned, trying to hold his own release off.

His words guided you right to your orgasm, shaking and crying while you came.

“Fuck, you want my cum inside you? Want me to stuff you full?” His pace was losing rhythm, chasing his orgasm while simultaneously overstimulating you.

“Mm, cum inside me. Want to feel it.” You cried, thrusting into him so you could feel more of him.

“So good, feels so good. Oh, I’m gonna cum inside of you,” Chris rambled, “Gonna fill you up with it.”

His moans were uncontrollable, spilling out of him as he relished in the warm feeling of your pussy.

“Cumming.” He grunted, as ropes of his cum spurted out, coating your insides until there was nothing left.

You both took the time to catch your breath, as Chris pulled out of you with a shaky sigh.

“Let me get you a towel.”

You turned onto your back once more, trying to comprehend the mind blowing sex you just had while dozens of people were partying downstairs.

Chris came back with a towel, cleaning the both of you up and passing you your underwear back.

“Hey.” You finally spoke, tired from all the stamina you had just burned.

“Hey.” He replied back to you.

“That was… amazing.” You sighed.

“Yeah, it was fun.”

You weren’t sure if he wanted you to leave now, or if you were supposed to stay, so you opted to do nothing.

“Let me take you on a date.” He announced, and you laughed.

“Don’t you think we’ve done this all a little backwards?”

Chris smiled and brought your head to his shoulder.

“I guess I’m just unpredictable.”

You then remembered you didn’t even use the condom you brought with you. You’d have to make your first date with Chris a trip to the pharmacy.

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

a/n haha…. always wear a condom, kids!

hope you enjoyed my first oneshot.

send me any requests you want me to write! i think i’m gonna do an nsfw alphabet next, for chris and matt too

#Spotify #chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo x reader #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #the sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo oneshot

[cy-cyborg]

Toph Beifong doesn’t hold up as disability representation - Disability in the Media

[ID: A screenshot of Toph, a twelve-year-old girl with black hair in a loose, green and tan short-sleeve shirt and shorts, cheering in an arena. Next to text written in a rough, blocky font: "Disability in Media - Toph Beifong Doesn't hold up as disability representation" /End ID]

Avatar the Last Airbender is one of my all-time favourite TV-shows, and Toph is still easily one of my favourite members of Team Avatar. I was a few years younger than Toph when the show first started airing, and being a disabled kid who was into martial arts, constantly being dismissed by my able-bodied opponents and teachers, meant that I connected very strongly with her right from the get-go.

But upon my last couple of rewatches of the series, I began to come to the realisation that my opinions on Toph as a shining example of good disability representation were... well, pretty heavily influenced by my nostalgia for the show and that many aspects of Toph's character just don't hold up today. Which, honestly is fair, the show is nearly 19 years old (if it were a person in my country, it would be old enough to drink) and I think it's pretty ridiculous to expect every part of every character from an 19 year old show to age well. So today I wanted to talk about the things I think Avatar the original Last Airbender did right with Toph, where I think they missed the mark, and what changes I think would need to be made to Toph to make her work for a modern audience.

So let's start with why I think Toph doesn't really hold up as "good disability representation" today, and the elements of her character that just haven't aged as well.

For me, one of the biggest issues I noticed upon rewatching the show, is how often we are told (often by Toph herself) that she is blind, but how infrequently we are actually shown it's impact on her life beyond her bending or outside of jokey contexts. Outside of her bending, we only ever see her blindness impacting her ability to do things like read or write, otherwise, she functionally has full vision -so far as the audience is informed - with the only exceptions being when she's in the air or water (e.g. on Appa or in the submarines) or in loose soil (e.g. the desert). Having places and circumstances where she doesn't have access to her power that allows her to "see" was a step in the right direction, but I do think it would have been better if her seismic sense wasn't quite as accurate, even in the most ideal of circumstances.

But why? Well, I think Suki explains it really well, long before Toph is even introduced. when Sokka says "I should have seen you as a warrior instead of a girl" Suki stops him and says "I am a warrior, but I'm also a girl". Being a warrior and a woman are both important parts of Suki's character, and only recognising her as one or the other means ignoring a big part of who she is, and the same is true for Toph. Being blind is a big part of toph's character that has informed a lot of her life, but so is being a warrior and bending master. Many people see Toph as a warrior or fighter, but ignore her disability, but both are important. She's disabled, and a warrior, and those things don't cancel each other out, the same way being a warrior doesn't diminish Suki's status as a woman.

When the show was still airing though (and even still today) it was very common to see non-disabled fans of the show exclaiming that they honestly forget that Toph is even blind sometimes, with many people going so far as to say that she's not even disabled (and that this was a good thing). While I do think some of that comes from the fact they weren't used to seeing a disabled character as both disabled and an active participant in these kinds of stories, I do think this mostly happened because of the show's lack of, well, showing the impact of her blindness on her daily life and allowing her earthbending and seismic sense to erase the effects of her disability to some extent. It's much harder to forget a character is blind when it impacts their daily life in ways that are shown to the audience. This doesn't have to be in big, showy ways mind you, showing things subtly but consistently works way better than one "very special episode" type setup.

In the show as it is though, the seismic sense functionally gives Toph a perfect image of her surroundings until it's just not available anymore for *plot reasons*.

[ID: A black and white shot of Toph and how she sees the oponent she's fighting, with shockwaves radiating from him towards her to indicate how she's interpreting the scene. Her foe has jumped into the air and now has his hand dug into the ground of an arena, about to launch rocks towards her. /End ID]

In many ways, her picture of the world is better and clearer than what the non-disabled characters can see, leading to this feeling of her disability being erased. It may have been better though if the seismic sense could give her a general idea of big things in her immediate vicinity but she still missed the finer details, functioning at least a little bit more like a tactile/earthy-vibration version of the limited sight some legally-blind people have in real life. Things like a person's position, movement and overall pose would still be "visible" to her in a general sense, as well as big things in the environment (including things underground, since there are a few plot-points that require that), but smaller things like details about objects and creatures, people's facial expressions or what they're doing with parts of their body that have no direct contact with the ground (like their hands) is less clear. On top of this, she may struggle to detect smaller, lighter objects or creatures that realistically wouldn't cause much of a vibration at all. creatures as small and as light as Momo and Hawky for example might be detectable, but "fuzzy" to her, and anything smaller might make enough of a vibration to tell her it's there when it moves, but not enough for her to be able to tell what specifically it is without some other cue (such as sound). There are a few moments in the show that seem to imply this is what they were initially going for, but it's not really consistent, and is directly contradicted in her debut episode, "the blind bandit" when she explains that she can even "see" something as small as the ants off in the distance.

[ID: A shot of Aang, a twelve-year-old bald boy with an arrow tattoo on his head, dressed in a yellow and orange outfit, standing with Toph at night. In the foreground is an anthill will a trail of ants, which Aang is looking for. /End ID]

With an adjustment like what I'm suggesting though, she still serves her narrative purpose of teaching Aang the importance of being able to wait and listen - possibly even more so, as her needing to wait and collect more information in order to get a clearer image before striking, would back-up what Bumi tells Aang that he needs in an earth bending master. It would also still help to illustrate the connectedness of the world, a theme Toph continues to embody heavily in The Legend of Korra, while still showing the ways her disability impacts her more frequently.

When I talked about the "super-crip" trope a while back, I mentioned that one way to avoid the more harmful elements of the trope (where the character's disability is erased by their powers) is to use the ability in question more like a mobility or disability aid than a straight-up cure. The power should help them, but shouldn't make their disability redundant. People are creative and we would find ways to use a superpower or magic to help with our disabilities if it were available in real life, but what's the point of including a disabled character if you're just going to functionally erase their disability? For a character like Toph, I think this is the kind of approach that should be taken with her. Her seismic sense still helps her, but it's not a perfect replacement. (Ironically, I did use Toph as a "good" example of that trope, but I do think after this last rewatch, for the reasons I'm discussing here, I might have to backtrack that a bit).

I considered giving an alternative approach here, to keep the sensitivity of toph's seismic sense as it is in the show as is, but giving it draw-backs such as making her susceptible to sensory overload similar to what autistic people experience. However, while replacing one disability with another can work for some characters and stories, I don't think it's the best adjustment to make for Toph or any blind character, largely thanks to this also being a trope. The "blind (or d/Deaf) person who's other senses become super-human to make up for it" trope is very common in fantasy, sci-fi as well as older martial arts films, and while I'm not really the best person to cover it, I do know that members of both the blind and deaf communities have expressed a lot of frustration with it. Toph already falls into this trope quite a bit, and any suggestions I could make would have just dialled that element up to 11, and fixing one problem with another is never a good idea.

Another thing that actually did bug me for a while, even before my most recent rewatch of the show, is how Toph is treated on the rare occasions she does point out something won't working for her. There are a number of times where Toph advocates for herself and points out that something The Gaang is doing isn't accessible to her or sets a boundary to do with her disability, and she's either left behind, her concerns are brushed off or she's ignored entirely. The three most noticeable examples of this are in the Episodes "The Ember Island Players," "The Library," and Toph and Katara's segment of "Tales of Ba Sing Se."

In the Ember Island Players, Toph complains that the seats they have for the play are too high up and too far away, and she's unable to "see" what's happening on stage. Her friends don't really take any notice of her though except for Katara who tells her not to worry, "I'll tell your feet what's happening."

[ID: A shot of Katara, a fourteen-year-old girl with long brown hair and blue eyes, sitting with Toph, who is sitting with her arms crossed, annoying in a theatre seat. Both Toph and Katara are wearing red and gold, fire-themed outfits. Katara is looking at something off-screen. /End ID]

My problem here is that this particular kind of situation is something that is familiar to a lot of disabled people. Even the least independent disabled people I know get annoyed when their access needs or requests for accommodations, even among friends, are ignored and their pushback is brushed off with "don't worry, I'll just help you!" It's one of the first things that many disabled people tell non-disabled folks wishing to be better allies to us: you offering help instead of actually accommodating us isn't a good thing. We don't want to rely on others if we can avoid it, because honestly, non-disabled people often aren't very good at actually helping or in this case, relaying information to us without training and more often than not, it just results in us being left out. I find it very hard to believe a character as independent as Toph would accept that without any protest, especially considering that is pretty much exactly what ends up happening (even if the show didn't really acknowledge it). Katara never actually conveys anything about the play to Toph, except when she's attempting to throw Toph's words back in her face when she asks for clarification about the actor playing her - which ends up backfiring on her.

[ID: A shot from the same location as before, this time Toph has a huge smile on her face and is leaning on the balcony excitedly while Katara is leaning towards her, annoyed by her reaction. /End ID]

While it would have been better if Toph was actually listened to, it would have been…fine? if a justification was given for why they had to sit there (e.g. to avoid being recognised), if Katara had actually described the play for her. This wouldn't have been ideal, but it would have been better at least. In real life, many movies, TV shows (including this show's sequel series, The Legend of Korra) and other forms of visual media have an Audio Description track that does exactly that. If they weren't going to move for Toph to be able to see better, having Katara describe the play could have introduced kids to the fact this is an option. but instead it's brushed off, and I'll admit, it left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth, even back in 2006.

The Library is a bit more forgivable in my opinion, since Toph is still new to the group, but in this episode, she states that she doesn't want to go inside the spirit library because she isn't able to read and therefor there wouldn't be anything for her to do. However, it still would have been nice to see her friends consider this at all before they actually arrived. They could have (and should have) still gone, but some acknowledgement that they at least thought about the inclusion of their disabled friend would have been nice.

[ID: A shot of Aang, Katara, Sokka and another man are talking while looking down at a map on the table. Meanwhile, Toph is sitting on the other side of the table, completely disinterested as she sips from a large ice cup with her feet up on another chair. /End ID]

Alternatively, I do feel like Wan Shi Tong, a self-proclaimed all-knowing-spirit or his assistants would have been able to point her in the direction of something to interest her, since he does imply books aren't the only form of knowledge he collects.

The reason I mention this though is two-fold. In real life, disabled people are very often left out of "fun" group activities, whether that be in formal settings or in casual ones, like hanging out with friends. If the episode had been framed as "the Gaang learns about the library and decides to track it down," I might have been less critical, but it's specifically framed as something that at least starts out as a kind of break for the team where they all take turns picking out fun things to do so they can rest, and Toph's access needs not being considered at all until they're already there hits a bit close to home, especially since they just end up leaving her outside. Secondly, there's also a stereotype that disabled people (and especially blind people) don't belong in academia and places of learning, such as in this case, libraries. This stereotype is about as old as the concept of organised institutions of learning, and definitely isn't unique to AtLA, but the assumption is often that disabled people wouldn't be interested in more formal methods of learning, so it's not worth accommodating us. With blind people in particular, when I've seen this in media, the premise is often "well I can't read anyway so why bother?" which Toph definitely falls into here with no push-back against the trope.

[ID: A close up of Toph and the rest of the group, Katara, Sokka and Aang standing in a desert. Toph shrugs, looking bored, while the others looks confused and surprised with the exception of Katara, who looks mildly annoyed, standing with her hands on her hips. /End ID]

It does make sense that she would have been resistant to going in, and I'm not saying this episode should have turned Toph into a bookwork akin to Wings of Fire's Starflight (another blind character) or anything. But there was a chance in this episode to push back against some of these assumptions, and I think it's a shame they missed it. How cool would it have been if Toph had mentioned not feeling welcomed in more formal learning spaces because of her disability, which was just reinforced by the way her old earthbending instructor and her parents treated her. She decides to go inside the library anyway as "backup" in case something goes wrong, grumbling about it the whole way down. Wan She Tong starts his introduction mostly the same way, saying humans aren't welcome and Toph makes a snarky comment about it. Wan She Tong, equally offended that this human thinks he, the all-knowing-spirit, wouldn't have considered something, shoots back with an annoyed comment about humans being so self-centred. He explains that spirits come in all shapes and sizes, and not all of them have eyes, but they can still access his library. She's not the first sightless being in his study, and he-who-knows-ten-thousand-things knows this too. Once everyone is permitted entry, one of the knowledge seekers shows her to a series of slates about a lost earthbending form that she can actually read (or at least, "see" the pictures on) because it's carved. Or instead of a slate, it's a series of statues outlining the form, similar to what Aang and Zuko find in the episode "The Firebending Masters". Perhaps this form is something that helps her develop metal bending later on, and lays the groundwork for Toph becoming interested in teaching in the comics.

And finally, Toph and Katara's segment of Tales of Ba Sing Se. Katara convinces Toph to go get a makeover with her as part of a girl's day. Overall, this segment of the episode is pretty nice, and I liked that they showed that a person's gender expression (in this case, being a tom-boy) doesn't mean they can't like things outside of what we usually associate with that. Tom-boys can like girly things on occasion, and vice-versa, and I think this is an example of an episode that would seem a bit ham-fisted today, but honestly, was needed in 2006. However, there's a throw away joke where Toph says "as long as they don't touch my feet," and it immediately cuts to show spa workers filing down the calluses on her feet in a way so painful several staff are required to hold her down.

[ID: An image of Toph in a bath robe being held down in a chair by two spa workers while a third scrubs at her feet so hard that she is sweating. Meanwhile Toph is fighting against the two holding her down and has a facial expression like she is in a great deal of pain. /End ID]

this might be a minor thing in the grand scheme of the show, but it's still another example of Toph's boundaries about her disability and her access needs being disrespected by her friends, which the show just doesn't acknowledge it at all. People ignoring Toph's wishes about a part of her body she depends on in a much more direct way that others do is played off like a joke in a montage of otherwise enjoyable and goofy activities and this is a very, very common experience in disability circles.

There are a number of other, much more minor issues that show up with Toph as well, such as the fact she's the only one of the main cast who never has an on-screen (or on-page) relationship. not in the original show, not in any of the comics and not in The Legend of Korra. Again, it's not a big issue on it's own, especially because in AtLA, she's young enough where it's possible that she was just not interested yet, and she does have kids in The Legend of Korra where she mentions a relationship with a man named Kanto (Lin's father). So it is implied she does have some form of relationship eventually, but the issue is that it's never shown on screen or on the page. This feeds into a wider pattern in media of disabled characters being the only ones in their respective cast not given on-screen romantic relationships in stories, and so I still think it's worth pointing out, especially since the creators have had a lot of opportunities to correct that by now.

Toph is also portrayed, pretty much undeniably, as the best earthbener in a way that, at times, comes across almost like the creators felt like they need to compensate for her being on the team "despite" her being blind. This trope is one that I think Toph, at least partially, helped to popularise with the current generation of story tellers: The Disabled Savant. In this trope, disabled characters aren't really given the same room for growth as other characters; they aren't permitted to be average or still learning, they start good and get better. If they do progress, they often become the best, which is the case for Toph. To be fair, everyone in the The Gaang is the best at their respective skill by the end of the first series, which is why I say this is a minor point. She dose, however, have the least amount of on-screen growth in skill out of the whole team. Katara starts out barely able to lift any water at all, let alone actually bend it. Sokka is skilled with weapons from the start but does get his butt handed to him a number of times by others with more experience than him whom he learns from throughout his story arc. Zuko spends most of the early-to-middle of the show having things "blow up in his face" (to use his own words) and being belittled by his family of prodigies. While Aang is an airbending and, to a lesser extent, waterbending prodigy, he fails at pretty much everything else for a while before he starts to find his confidence - especially earth and firebending, not to mention the entire situation with locking himself out of the Avatar state. Toph is the only one who doesn't seem to fail or struggle all that much from a combat perspective. She does grow and improve in her bending (she invents metal bending after all) but she never has any moments where she really messes up or even struggles in combat all that much compared to the others.

All of these points and criticisms I've mentioned are not necessarily big in and of themselves, but when looked at together, they build up to create some issues with how Toph is depicted and how the people around her treat her disability

So that's it then? Toph is bad disability rep and Avatar should be "cancelled"?

God no. Like I said at the start, I still adore Toph and Avatar as a whole, but the show is a year away from being two decades old, it's bound to have some elements that don't hold up and I think it's worthwhile discussing them, specifically because I love the show and it's characters. Despite all the negativity I've brought up, I do think there are a lot of things AtLA did well with Toph too.

I've mentioned a few times that we rarely see how Toph's blindness impacts her life outside of her bending and combat abilities, and there's a reason I made that specification. Unsurprisingly, if you know much about the show's development, the ways in which Toph’s blindness and seismic sense impacts her bending and fighting style is one area where the show really does shine, and I still think that is worth a mention. The various types of bending are based on different styles of martial arts, specifically, different types of Kung Fu. Most earthbending in the show takes heavy inspiration specifically from Hung Ga, but Toph is different. Her bending heavily references Southern Praying Mantis Kung Fu, something unique to her within this world.

The reason for this (outside of simply wanting her to be visually distinct) was because the show’s creators made sure to consider what limitations Toph might have and what parts of the more common earthbending styles wouldn't work for her. Since her connection to the earth was critical in order for her seismic sense to work, they decided on a style that would keep her feet on the ground more, prioritised strong stances with minimal jumping and put more focus on attacking with her upper body. While not an intentional choice, the style they went with for Toph, according to the show's head martial arts consultant, Sifu Kisu, was supposedly developed by a blind woman in real life, at least according to legend. The creators also made further adjustments to the style with the help of martial arts consultants and just watching Toph fight is evident that a lot of love and care was put into the decisions made on that front.

I also appreciate that Toph's disability wasn't off-limits to joke about.

[ID: A picture of Toph waving her hand in front of her face with an exaggerated smile to remind the others she's blind. /End ID]

As I already mentioned, they didn't land 100% of the time, but lot of shows are afraid to use disability as a source of jokes, which would have felt weird and out of place in a show like Avatar. I see this hesitance in real-life too; people get extremely uncomfortable when I joke about my own disabilities and I've heard several people and even disabled comedians talk about the same observation. My last video on Tik Tok that got outside my usual audience was a joke about my prosthetic leg, and every single stictch and duet I received was people saying some variation of "I'm such a bad person for laughing!" "I'm going to hell!" or just straight up asking if they're aloud to laugh. If I didn't want you to laugh, I wouldn't have posted the joke! But joking about disability does make it more approachable. Despite how often Toph and the others made blind jokes though, outside of the one instance I mentioned earlier, they never felt mean-spirited or like they were punching down. Even when a very sleep-deprived Katara was intentionally trying to be.

I think it's also worth keeping in mind the context of the media landscape when Avatar The Last Airbender was airing. Today, characters like Toph are very common, so much so there's a whole trope about them (super-crips) but at the time, having a character with a major disability be a main character in an action-orientated kids show like Avatar was really rare. She wasn't the first of course, but a lot of the time, if they were included, they were almost certainly sad and depressed, wishing for a cure or they were designated to the roles of "Guy in the chair" (which is a character, usually a tech person, who helps from the background), inspiration, scary villain fake-out (or other variations of "creepy" character) or the actual villain. Having a character that was not only comfortable in her skin as a disabled person, who didn't want or need to be "fixed" or "cured" to be directly involved in the story, and who's main obstacle (at least in season 2) were how the people around her treated her, was pretty ground-breaking at the time (pun not intended) and went against the most prevalent stereotypes of it's day.

And I really want to emphasise that. For many Millennials and older Gen Zers, myself included, Toph was the first character that didn't tell us we were broken and needed to be fixed in order to be part of the group (even if they slipped up with that messaging occasionally). Prior to seeing Avatar, I honestly thought there was something deeply wrong with me for being happy with my life (a reminder, I was 10 years old when this show first started airing), because every other disabled person in the media only ever talked about how much worse their life was because of their disability, how much they hated it and how much they hated themselves. Many outright said that they wished they had died rather than become like me. Toph wasn't the first to go against those tropes, but she was the first example of a disabled character who wasn't like that many people my age saw. Did she do it perfectly? Hell no, but personally, back then, I was happy to have a character who maybe over-corrected and took things a bit too far than another sad character talking about how lives like mine weren't worth living.

I also deeply appreciated that Toph did struggle with her independence, at least initially, and where to draw the line with accepting help. Because of how much she'd been coddled and overprotected as a little kid, she saw any attempt at people being helpful and working as a team as them trying to baby her. It was very on the nose, but I liked that the show gave her an episode just dedicated to realising that it's ok to accept help. Again, this is a bit of a story telling trope today, but having the disabled character realise that it's ok to accept help, and to do it without talking down to them or saying that them wanting independence was bad, was a refreshing change compared to what was around at the time.

[ID: a zoomed out image of Toph, standing before her parents with Aang, Katara and Sokka standing behind her. /End ID]

While I think the show's creators could have benefited from consulting with disabled people and specifically blind people the same way they brought in consultants for the martial arts featured in the show, it's very clear to me that the intention behind Toph's character was good, and that actual effort was put in to make sure they depicted her well, even if some of it was a bit misplaced. It's also worth noting that the groundwork for a lot of my suggestions is already in place, they just didn't follow it all the way through. Overall, I'd say Toph was good for her time, and she's what was needed in the 2000's, even if she doesn't hold up as well today. I also think it speaks to how far we've come in terms of disability representation. When I first started engaging with the online fandom directly, almost no one, even other disabled people, argued that Toph wasn't good representation, because honestly, the bar was on the floor and we were just happy to have something different. But now there are options, and the standards are higher, and that's so, so good. It means that people, even in the media, are starting to listen and be more thoughtful about their depictions of disability than we were in 2006.

And finally, I want to really quickly mention The Netflix adaptation of Avatar. A few people have asked me now what I think they should do with Toph when they get to her, and what my predictions about the show are. I'm not going to talk about my predictions here, because this post is already way too long and that's not what this is about, but I don't think the suggestions I made today would necessarily work in this particular remake, primarily because of the tonal differences. Some adjustments definitely could, such the other characters doing a better job at listening to Toph when she points out inaccessibility and them actually considering her in the first place, but others might be harder to balance. The original show could get quite dark and serious at times, but it was primarily a light-hearted adventure story for kids. From what I've seen of the live action remake though, they're more heavily leaning into those serious elements - for better or for worse, and as such, trying to tone Toph down in the specific ways I mentioned might not balance out as well as it would in the original show. At the very least, the specifics would need to be different. To be honest, I'm not entirely sure what approach they should take, that's not really the point of this post, but I did want to quickly address it to avoid confusion. My suggestions today were specifically on how to approach the cartoon version of Toph for a modern audience, and were not meant to be read as suggestions on how her live-action counterpart should be depicted.

#writing disability with cy cyborg #Wow I had a lot more to say about this than I thought (I think this is my longest post to date lol) #writing disability #disability representation #writeblr #writing #Avatar #avatar the last airbender #atla #Long Post #toph #toph beifong #the gaang #Animated Avatar #disability in media #fantasy