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coolyiooo · 10 months

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Making BSD Men Climax From Making Out With You

Pairings: Dazai, Ranpo, Fyodor, Atsushi, and Chuuya

❗Warnings❗: biting, hickeys, humping, pulling hair, orgasms, twitching, moaning, and arousal

🖤DAZAI🖤

You were laying on your bed while Dazai was on top of you. Your legs were wrapped around his hips and one of your hands was touching his hair and the other on his shoulder. One of his hands was on the side of your neck and the other on your back. You were making out aggressively, both of you moaning and breathing heavily from the intense kiss. He then moves his head to your neck and starts leaving hickeys

"Your so perfect my belladonna~" he whispers against your neck

You respond in a quiet moan, but you pull his hair slightly to tug him away from your neck and you flip yourself over, now you were on top of Dazai.

He chuckles with a smirk "Getting feisty bella~?"

You give a genuine smile back at him "I just want to show you how much I love you"

You kiss his forehead to his cheek, neck, collarbone and chest "Give you the love i believe you deserve" you whisper against his skin

You sit up and grab one of his arms, raising his bandaged wrist towards your lips, kissing it gently

"I love every part about you" you say as you stare into his eyes lovingly

He feels his heart skip beats. His eyes slowly widen. He feels like he doesn't deserve to hear such praise, especially from you. His hand, still being kissed by you, gently cups your face

He's about to say something, but you kiss his lips again. He wants to say how he doesn't deserve it, but he becomes a victim of your affection and gives into your kiss. Instead of the aggressive pace you did previously, it was now a passionate, gentle make out. You slowly kiss every inch of his body and mumble about how much you love him as a person as well.

"You always make me happy I'm so glad to have met you" you whisper between each kiss.

He starts to moan deeply. His hands gripping on to your bed sheets as you slowly rock your hips on his.

"B-bella~" you cut off his sentence with a kiss on the lips and pull his hair gently to deepen it.

He moans into the kiss, but he feels intense arousal only getting stronger by every second of your lips against his. He then widens his eyes and pulls away from the kiss. His head falls into the pillow as he moans beautifully, slightly arching his back and twitching.

You knew instantly what had just happened when you saw the new wet stain on his pants. You make eye contact with a wide eyed, flushed face Dazai as he was breathing heavily.

"I- it wasn't what it looks like! Your over thinking things!" He laughs nervously

You smile and kiss his lips to shut up his excuses. You embrace him with a warm hug. Your head laying on his chest.

"Please don't be so embarrassed my love. I told you I was going to give you the love I believe you deserve after all" you say

You can hear his heart beat rapidly as you say that. You get up to look at him. He seems to still be embarrassed, but he smiles kindly, putting a hand on your cheek

He softly says "I've never felt better in my whole life"

💚RANPO💚

You were straddling on top of Ranpo on the couch making out. Your hand rested on the back of his neck to pull him closer to your lips, deepening the kiss, earning a muffled whimper from Ranpo.

Your hand slowly moves up from his neck to the back of his head, feeling his hair, grabbing a fist full of it, making his hat fall to the ground. You and Ranpo's hips slowly rock into each other. His hands on your thighs, squeezing them gently. You pull away from his lips, which makes Ranpo whine from the sudden loss of your touch.

"Your so cute Ranpo~ I just want to kiss every inch of you" you say as you kiss his neck and collarbone, kindly nibbling his skin too.

He moans as a response to your praise, but he smiles "Your pretty cute like this. I want more of you, sugar~"

He dives into your lips, kissing you again.You listened to what he said and plan to give him more. You grab one of his hands, bringing it under your shirt and bra to place it on your bare breast. He starts to play with your breast making both of you moan, but he wanted to tease you a bit.

He pinches your nipple gently which makes you moan louder and grind against him harder. The more you moved against him the more he felt your body against his hard cock, which you thought was just something in his pocket. He started to moan a little louder

"You like that Ranpo~?" You whisper in his ear

"Mhmm~ your so soft~" he whimpers

You smiled "God you make me so wet~" you say before you kiss him again.

He started to feel too aroused, you were becoming too much for him. Electricity flowed though his body everytime you spoke and kissed his lips or neck. His breathing was getting heavy as he felt his limit.

"S-sugar wait~!" He said, but it was too late.

He whimpered loudly as he came on his pants. His forehead against your chest as he squeezed your breast and thigh. He was twitching aggressively.

You were a bit dazed about what happened, but it didn't take too long for you to figure it out. You could tell he was trying to hide his embarrassed face, his pride probably broken. You grab his hand that was still on your breast and brought it under your underwear, bringing his fingers to your wet cunt. He looks up at you with open eyes

"Don't be so embarrassed Ranpo. Can you feel the affect you have on me too?"

He gulps but then he suddenly finds his confidence again and enters a finger inside your wet cunt. You squeeze into his shoulders as you moan loudly, laying your head on his chest.

"I want to see more, sugar~"

💜FYODOR💜

You sat on Fyodor's lap as you were both passionately making out. His hands on your hips and yours on his shoulders. Fyodor set the pace to slow and gentle, but you wanted to go faster and aggressive. You just wanted more of him. You tried to go at a faster pace, but Fyodor pulled his lips away from you and said

"Be patient my love"

You whined "please Fedya I want to feel more of you. It's becoming unbearable for me to keep going like this"

He chuckles "just a bit longer myshka~"

He kisses your lips again going at a slightly faster pace. You moan into the kiss and begin to rock your hips against his thigh. He smirks into the kiss from seeing how desperate you've become, but he starts to feel tingly all over his body. He's never felt this before and he couldn't stop your movement.

Everytime you begged and pleaded it only made the feeling worse. Everytime you desperately tried to go at a faster pace, but only couldn't and seeing you devastated made him feel aroused. To know he has so much power over you was amusing to him.

"So g-good P-please Fedya~" you moaned against his lips

"Your doing so well my myshka~" he said trying to hide his moan

"You look so breath taking like this" he says in a low voice

All he could think about was you and the stimulation, which only reached him closer to his limit. His heart raced faster and faster. Before he finished though, he sank his teeth into your neck. Your pained, loud whimper was the cherry on top for Fyodor as he climaxed on himself. Your voice was so loud, you couldn't hear his grunt as he came.

He kissed your fresh bite mark. His breathing was shaky and fast, but his body was slightly trembling.He didn't want you to know what you just made him do nor let you figure it out before it was too late, so he came up with an idea.

You were gonna ask if he was ok since he was twitching and breathing heavily, but he kissed your lips and dug his fingers under your underwear to rub against your clit, making you moan loudly. Your head laid on his shoulder while your hands grip harshly on them too. Your body was already stimulated from the make out

"You were this wet just from my lips my love?" He smiled knowing he also has an affect on your body

"Go ahead and finish on my fingers darling"

💙ATSUSHI💙

You were both sitting on the couch making out aggressively, but passionately. You were sitting on top of him with your hands on his hair and cheek and his were on your hips. You were both moaning into the kiss while he was a blushing mess.

Both of you were breathing heavily and slightly humping each other.Your hands slowly roam his entire body to his chest, shoulders, back, and neck. This made Atsushi's moan louder since he's never been touched like this before or even received such love from someone. He wasn't complaining one bit, but he is sensitive everywhere you touch him.

This is the most intimate thing you both have done in this relationship. You tug on his hair gently to pull away from the kiss and start to attack his neck with kisses instead. He starts to whimper from the sensation.

"Atsushi your so beautiful.. you literally make me crazy" you whispered as you continue to kiss him

Every praise you say just sends electricity of arousal throughout his entire body that he can even feel it in his fingers.

"Mmm~! J-just like that" he whimpers

"Heh I can't get enough of you" you whisper again before you unbutton about three buttons on his shirt and start kissing his chest and collarbone.

He can only respond to you in moans and whimpers. His hands gripping onto your hips tightly from too much stimulation. You start to kiss his lips again and passionately make out. Your hips begin to rock against his hard cock, which you assumed was just his wallet.

"W-wait~!" He whimpers out loud but you kept on kissing him

He started to whimper and breath heavier and suddenly he pulled away from the kiss. He hugs you tightly, putting his chin on your shoulder and moans loudly while twitching intensely.

At first you were confused, but then you realized what had just happened. He couldn't move or say anything, all you could hear was heavy breathing. His forehead was now laying on your shoulder, you could see his ears are shaded red. You knew he was embarrassed.

He then looks up at you "I-im so sorry! I- it's just you were too much for me to handle so I just- I'm sorry!" He said timidly

You chuckled and kiss his lips "You have a huge affect on me too Atsushi. There's no need to apologize"

You lean into his ear and whisper "hearing your moans and whimpers made me so wet"

you lean back to look into his eyes. He was In shock, too speechless to say anything, but then he suddenly finds his words again.

"I- I want more of you...please"

🧡CHUUYA🧡

You were sitting on top of his desk while Chuuya was in between your legs. His hands wonder all over your body, feeling every inch of you. Your hands were on his cheek and shoulder. You were both lovingly making out, quietly moaning and groaning into the kiss. He pulls away from your lips and attacks your neck with soft kisses, lowering your sleeve to kiss your shoulders, trying to kiss more of your skin as much as possible.

"You make my mind go blank" you whisper as you hold onto the back of his head.

Your head leaned back so he can have more access to your neck."F-fucking shit!..I love you so much" he mumbles under your skin

"Your so beautiful Chuuya I want more of you~" you moan softly

He kisses your lips again, this time with more passion. Your arms wrap around the back of his neck, bringing his body closer to yours. Your pelvises rubbing against each other. One of your hands starts to pull on Chuuya's hair, only making him moan louder into the kiss.

"Your everything I've ever wanted please don't stop" you panted

This only influences Chuuya to be more aggressive. Your praises give him so much arousal he can't even think straight. Every touch, kiss, praise, and moan you make drives him over the edge. He soon finds himself at his limit.He gasps while squeezing your waist as he comes on himself, grunting loudly. His chin on your shoulder, trying to catch his breath as his legs tremble. His breath shaking from the intense sensation.

You were shocked, but suddenly finds yourself chuckling softly "your so precious Chuuya. Don't be embarrassed, I find it actually quite flattering I have such an affect on you"

"F-fuck what are you doing to me doll?" he says looking at you with blushing cheeks, clearly a bit embarrassed, but he still smiles at you.

You lean into his ear "If u were so needy to be inside me then you could've said something darling"

Almost immediately, He slams your shoulders onto the desk, leaving you startled, as you feel Chuuya raise your legs to lay on his shoulders.

He smirks "You don't have to tell me twice"

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fandomapocalypse · 3 months

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Love and relationships in Hazbin Hotel

Episode 7 has something interesting and in the song that is called "Out for love" is sung by a character that is referring to a type of love different from a romantic or sexual one, Carmilla is openly talking about familial love. Vaggie of course relates this to her romantic feelings towards Charlie and how she wants to help her. But something else interesting happens in episode 7, Rosie is properly introduced as Alastor's bestie. This leads to showing another type of love: platonic love.

Now to the main point of this post: Alastor. It's canon that he is aroace and as an ace myself (I'm still questioning whether I'm aromantic or demiromantic but this post isn't about me lol) I'm extremely happy to see myself through him. Plus, the fact that the perfect Tumblr sexyman is aroace is genius and hilarious, you can't possibly top this type of humor.

Alastor for me has been a great ace representation and I've seen myself mainly in how he acts around his friends or other people.

When it comes to Niffty it looks more like a relationship between someone with their feral cat or their crazy little sister. But it's still a genuine connection and a fun chaotic one at that, he even lets her touch his hair and climb on him. In regards to Mimzy, he has shown he cares about her and welcomes her with open arms. He openly hugs her, which shocks everyone in the cast. This is extremely important because Alastor usually only starts physical contact to mock others or to pretend physical closeness as a manipulation tactic (like he often does with Charlie). When it comes to people he hates Alastor may touch them but will quickly wipe his hand on his clothes, like what he did with Lucifer. Personally, I don't like personal contact and only accept it if I start it and usually I use it as a way to show affection with close friends. Also, they have known each other since they were alive, so Mimzy probably knows a lot about Alastor that the rest of the cast doesn't. Mimzy also says that they used to dance together. But that doesn't exclude the fact that she uses Alastor's friendship and affection to save her own ass and taking into account how Husk reacted to Mimzy, this isn't the first time she does this. Also, the relationship between the two starts to crumble after what happened in episode 6 and Mimzy seems to be the kind of friend who will pretend that they are still on good terms and still ask Alastor for favors in the future.

Now jumping back to Alastor's true bestie: Rosie. They probably bonded at first over their cannibalistic natures but it's clear that it evolved beyond that. Personally, I don't ship Alastor with anyone, but when it comes to Rosie I headcanon they are in a QPR.

There are various reasons why this relationship is so great and wholesome, the first one being that there is no power imbalance, they are equals. Both are cannibalistic overlords and are on equal footing in terms of power. When Rosie first sees Alastor she is genuinely happy which is something new because most people react badly to him out of fear or hatred.

Alastor respects Rosie, he even compliments her, in her introduction he says she is "the most darling, delightful, and dangerous Overlord of this side of the pentagram". Considering how self-centered and narcissistic he can be, it means a lot. Alastor would rather die again than compliment another Overlord who isn't Zestial, which he respects but out of fear. Alastor respects Rosie as his close friend. When they stand next to each other they give an air of equals, something that never happens thanks to Alastor's ego and sadism towering over everyone else. With Rosie it's different and Rosie can openly tease Alastor with the "Look at you, so polite! Alastor you can learn a thing or two" when comparing him to Charlie when meeting her, or "I'm just kidding, I know you're an ace in the hole" to tease him about his asexuality. This is something that not a lot of people can do because Alastor is obsessed with control and respect. After all, we see how badly he reacted when Husk insulted him.

He also harmonizes with her, he willingly makes a duet with her in "Ready for this". He isn't interrupting her, instead, he agrees with her and they sing together in unison. This is the first time he doesn't openly hijack a song or fight for control over it, like he did with Vox and Lucifer (although this also happened because this is Charlie's song, but who cares the point still stands). Also, this is the first time we see him dance with someone, instead of forcing them to join his musical number (like he does with Charlie on various occasions). Alastor and Rosie are in perfect sync and it's so wholesome and precious to see him being so openly happy with her. Many have pointed out that the only times Alastor is genuinely smiling is when he is with Rosie and it shows by his expression in his eyes.

Finally, Rosie is the only one capable of bringing the most human emotions out of him, the most obvious one being confusion. In the scene of "ace in the hole" Rosie manages to confuse and surprise Alastor for a solid second, which is a huge change of his persona around everyone else of control and manipulation. Also, it's hilarious that Alastor doesn't know what being aroace is, he probably thinks he is above all that.

He is openly relaxed around Rosie and lets her touch him in an affectionate way, something that not even Mimzy can do. It may be because of the height difference but Mimzy only touches Alastor to hug him and to emphasize he is a "heartless son of a bitch" and Alastor clearly gets irritated by her touching him that way and even moves her finger away from him. This never happens with Rosie and he even welcomes her touching him by not having any walls with her. It's Rosie the one starting the physical contact and Alastor doesn't seem to mind and he never tries to use physical contact to take advantage of her like he does with other characters. Rosie is one of the few people who can touch Alastor without losing an arm and instead have a positive reaction out of him.

The most genuine relationship Alastor has is with Rosie, he even has the confidence and comfort to stop his elegant and reserved persona of not swearing. Which he only does when he is truly angry, like what happened with Lucifer. Or when he is threatening someone like he did with Adam. Or when he is shocked when his microphone breaks. He swears to insult Susan, which is someone they both despise equally. Something that you would only do with your closest bestie.

Finally, let's talk about Alastor's breakdown in the last episode. We've already seen that Alastor is capable of having friendships that aren't based on an end goal. Alastor knows this but he rejects it because he is at the hotel originally for selfish goals and doesn't want his emotions to get in the way. He is terrified of ruining his reputation as a sadistic killer and becoming an altruistic who cares about his friends. Alastor wants to stop himself from starting to care about the crew the same way he cares about Rosie, Mimzy, or Nifty to some degree. This is confirmed by his conversation with Niffty, where he admits he has grown accustomed to the main crew and perhaps he is growing feelings of affection towards them in his own way.

In regards to shipping him with Rosie, I see it as a platonic ship or a QPR. Some people have a headcanon that if they had known each other when they were alive they would have married for tax benefits and to avoid the social stigma, which is the only right answer. When they first met in hell they probably had dates in cannibal town where they ate human flesh while gossiping and trash-talked about the other overlords. Which is exactly what an ace person like myself wants from a close friendship.

As an ace, I really like Alastor not because he is the ultimate Tumblr sexyman or see him as hot but because he is an extremely fun character that I can relate to. I'm grateful for the crew and VA that take into account he is aroace and take seriously that aspect of his character. I don't mind that the aroace representation in Hazbn Hotel is a narcissistic psychopath, if you want a more wholesome ace representation you can check Todd in Bojack Horseman or Saiki in The Disastrous Life of Saiki K.

I don't mind people shipping Alastor, after all, it's just people having fun, but you can't ignore that he is aroace and how this affects his relationships. So yeah have fun and respect and aroace community :)

ok thanks for hearing my rant bye

#hazbin hotel #alastor #rosie #hazbin hotel rosie #asexual #aromantic #aroace #aspec #radiorose

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little-miss-dilf-lover · 7 months

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hi luv :), i have a frank castle and reader request. something like the reader is an introverted & quiet person and when being introduced to his small group of people at a small gathering like karen page, she feels inadequate & insecure and everyone’s attention is on karen. but he always notices every little thing about reader & knows she can be talkative, especially with just him, reassurance and maybe smut in the end, tysm :’) <3

hii lovie!! my thing for him has resurfaced lately so this is perfect, but no smut in this one, really sorry. thanks for requesting, hope you like it💌

—

NODS AND SMILES

frank castle x f!reader

word count. 652

warnings. none, just fluff. frank being so bf😔

You and Frank shared many similar characteristics - both quiet individuals, preferring the company of oneself over the hustle and bustle of others. But amongst the likeliness laid many juxtaposing traits. Frank had the charm and confidence to initiate a conversation with a stranger - to talk as if he'd known them a lifetime, whereas you were the polar opposite. You had trouble stirring up a discussion with someone you didn't know - to talk freely without fear of embarrassing yourself.

You're the kind of person who requires time to warm to someone - who needs a blanket of security to feel comfortable enough to open up. There were very few that have made you feel that way, the main being your boyfriend, Frank.

Through Frank's unquestioning love and reassurance, you've learnt he is a pillar you can rely on to feel comfortable - someone that can make you feel safe in unfamiliar settings. He's the kind of person you use for a sense of comfort.

So when you find yourself a shy, queasy mess surrounded by Frank's friends, you know you can count on your boyfriend to coax you out of hiding if needed. You wanted to mingle, to join in on the conversation -with the help of liquid courage- but you couldn't form any words for the life of you.

There wasn't much you could do other than nod and smile as Karen shared stories about her work. You wanted to ask her questions - get to know her, to get to know more about the woman who's helped keep your boyfriend alive, but as others chimed in, steering the conversation, you decided to stay quiet, nervously biting your straw as you tapped your foot to the bar music.

Frank sat beside you, cornering you in the booth, a protective hand on your knee as he sipped on a beer and caught up with his friends.

You wanted to speak up - ask questions about them, talk about something that interested you, but as you finally buckled up enough courage, the conversation drew to a close, and the others went to the bar to refresh their drinks.

The second the table empties, Frank turns to you, his face full of concern. He wanted to ask what had happened - why you cocooned yourself after promising to try. He wanted to ask what had you all turned around, why you hadn't said more than five words, but as he noticed your subtle frown, he knew now wasn't the time.

"Wanna go home, mama?" Frank quietly asked, slipping his hand into yours, his thumb brushing comforting strokes over the back of it.

"No, no. I'm good," you lie, flashing a faux smile.

Frank could see right through you - he always could. He knew you were lying to spare his feelings, pretending you were enjoying bar night for the sake of him. He found it admirable for you to put yourself in the depths of discomfort so that he could catch up with old pals.

And as the others rejoined around the table, Frank began to gather your things, whipping up an elaborate lie to avoid putting you in the spotlight - saying how it was getting late and he hadn't eaten yet.

You said your goodbyes with genuine smiles, hugging his friends before leaving the bar.

Your arm wrapped around Frank's as you quietly walked down the late-night street, following after his lead. He knew you felt worn down and tired from your evening out, drained and wanting nothing more than to be in the comfort of home, so he suggested grabbing take-out to enjoy on the couch.

You stopped past one of your locals, ordering all your favourite dishes to reward you for your efforts tonight. And after eating your body weight in take-out food, you spent the rest of the night snuggled on the sofa watching shitty tv, recuperating.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

#request #frank castle #frank castle x reader #frank castle x female reader #frank castle x you #frank castle fluff #frank castle imagine #frank x reader

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saltywinteradult · 1 month

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“there is no way in hell Alicent is going to abandon her children” why not?

Aegon’s a rapist and Aemond’s a sociopathic kinslayer, why should Alicent be forced to stay loyal to them?

I understand Rhaenyra why loves Jace, Luke and Joffrey because what’s not to love, they’re perfect. But I cannot see Alicent genuinely loving Aegon and Aemond after everything they’ve done.

It would be 100x more radical and feminist for Alicent to choose Rhaenyra, to put herself first, to stop letting men control her.

Goodness me, I hardly know where to start with this.

I don’t know how you think parental love works, nonny dearest, but it sure as hell isn’t "I won't love my children if they're not perfect people". That’s generally not how parenthood works. And Alicent loves her children. She was sold as a child bride and endured years of rape for the sake of producing those children. Raising and protecting them has been the main purpose of Alicent’s life for twenty years. How could she not love them?

In case you need proof, Alicent physically attacked Rhaenyra, arguably the big love of her life, because she was that angry (and rightfully so) about her son being maimed. Alicent went along with usurping Rhaenyra's throne, despite knowing it would lead to war and ruin what little chance she had left of mending things with Rhaenyra, because she loves her children and is desperate to keep them safe, and she believes that Rhaenyra would kill them to secure her claim to the throne. (Whether that is true is a different discussion - what matters here is that Alicent believes it.) Alicent stepped in front of a dragon to protect Aegon, for crying out loud. Aegon being a rapist clearly tarnished him in her eyes, and yet she still stepped in front of that dragon to protect him. If that doesn't tell you everything you need to know about Alicent's love for her children, I don't know what will. So I don't know that this is a case of Alicent being "forced" to stay loyal to her children, as much as it is Alicent choosing to stay loyal to the people she loves most in the world.

I would also like to point out that Rhaenyra's children are very much not perfect. Jace and Luke both participated in bullying Aemond. In case you forgot, it was Luke who literally mutilated and permanently disabled Aemond. It doesn't matter if Aemond was in the wrong for claiming Vhagar or calling the Strong boys bastards. He wasn't, but even if he was, cutting out someone's eye is not a thing that good people do. So I don't know where you got the idea that Jace and Luke are "perfect", nonny dearest, but it sure as hell wasn't from HotD.

I'm not going to argue over whether Luke maiming Aemond is more or less bad than Aegon raping Dyana or Aemond killing Luke (which is his fault, even if in this version of the story he didn't intend for it to happen). That's not the point. And please note, I am not making a single excuse for Aegon raping Dyana or Aemond killing Luke. I'm simply pointing out that it is extremely hypocritical to claim that Aemond and Aegon are unloveable because of the terrible things they do, but Jace and Luke are loveable when they both do terrible things as well.

And here's the thing. Rhaenyra clearly loves Jace and Luke anyway. Why wouldn't she? They're her kids and she loves them flaws and all. So why is it any less believable that Alicent would love Aegon and Aemond? Why are Jace and Luke loveable despite their terrible deeds, but Aegon and Aemond aren't? And if Alicent choosing Rhaenyra, whom she loves, would be a feminist storytelling choice, why would it be any less feminist for her to choose to stay with her family whom she loves just as much? Why are Alicent's choices only Feminist and Radical when they benefit Rhaenyra?

Even if it were true that Alicent abandoning her family and becoming lifetime president of the Rhaenyra Fan Club would make for a more feminist story - which, to be clear, it isn't - my first priority is not for the story to be The Most Radical And Feminist™. I want the story to be good. And I do not think that making Alicent abandon her family for Rhaenyra would make for a good story. It goes completely against Alicent's characterisation to have her abandon the family we're shown time and time again that she loves more than anything else. Not only would that be a betrayal of her character, it would undermine the narrative as a whole.

For better or worse, these two women and their relationship have been made central to this story. They are foils and they've each been made into the figurehead of their respective teams in every way, down to the marketing of the show. It would simply be bad storytelling to throw off that narrative balance by having them team up. It would completely upend the story being told. The point of making Rhaenyra and Alicent's relationship so central to the show is that despite their love for each other they were still driven apart and forced to become enemies. Having them reconcile would undermine the point that this story is a tragedy.

#alicent hightower #pro alicent hightower #rhaenicent #rhaenyra x alicent #rhaenyra targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #aemond targaryen #jacaerys velaryon #anti lucerys velaryon #house of the dragon #hotd

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the-cat-and-the-birdie · 8 months

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Also don't think anyone has said this (thats a joke) but like, art styles aside:

The animation, expressions, movement, everything of ATSV is IMPECCABLE.

Like insanely, ridiculously, almost mind bogglingly good.

[This is a MEDIUM length post]

The main strength is the Emotion -

In terms of animation, the range of emotions Miguel is capable of expressing is like... crazy good. Gwen's emotions ARE UNSPEAKABLY IMPRESSIVE.

LIKE...ANIMATING HER FUCKING BREATHING???? AND BLINKS!! AS AN EMOTIONAL CUE. HELLO???!!

And the movie hinges on this - almost every scene has an emotional cue that HAS to hit. Whether is Jess's looks of hesitation or Peter B.'s looks of horror.

And this may seem like the most ridiculous comparison ever made but like...

The Bee Movie and Across the Spider-Verse came out FIFTEEN YEARS APART.

THE BEE MOVIE...THIS MONSTRASITY that has plagued humankind - was made less than two decades from THIS:

The fact that we progressed that far as a society (pun intended) in that short of a time will never not baffle me.

I genuinely cannot name any other animated movie that:

Has multiple styles throughout the duration

Can seamlessly change styles without the viewer immediately noticing (like Gwen returning to her universe)

Show two or more animation styles on screen at the same time (and no, Roger Rabbit and Space Jam don't count - that's half live action lol)

Just off the top of my head - ATSV shows up to three styles in one scene: I'm mainly thinking of the scene that shows Hobie (customized - style 1), Peter B. (standard - style 2), and Miguel (a light stylized - style 3).

It can be brought to four if you want to count Miles/Gwen, though their style isn't visible.

I can think of a couple scenes that genuinely blew me away in terms of animation -

One being Rio's 'What-EVER?!' because of the little stance correction and head bob she does, because it's such a natural thing to do. And it adds so much to an already perfect line.

It's something someone would genuinely do IRL without even noticing.

Another I LOVE is Pavitr and Hobie roughhousing.

Like, I can't yell about these five seconds of animation more.

It's SO fluid it looks like Motion-Capture and I left the theatre googling is any Mo-Cap was used in the movie (and from what I can tell - no, it's all original animation).

The way Pavitr falls to the side and bumps them - This not only being a natural reaction to Hobie and his weight, but it also LOOKS natural. So much so you can see it affect Hobie's model too. The movement has kinetic energy on both models -

Which is AMAZING CONSIDERING THEY'RE ANIMATED ON LIKE FOUR DIFFERENT TIMES.

In this shot alone, there's the guitar, vest, AND Hobie, all of which have their own animation rules. Plus the outline on his guitar AND him. And then there PAVI too, who's running at a higher frame rate, touching and interacting with Hobie.

So much so that Hobie's model nearly wraps himself around Pavi. Pavi's hair is moving, Hobie's guitar is moving, there's movement in the background - and it looks GREAT.

PLUS THE CAMERA IS MOVING AND GOSTLING. IT'S NOT A STATIC SHOT. The models and camera are moving AS IF THEY'RE REAL when they're not.

That's - My..I CAN EVEN COMPUTE THAT.

But by far, I think the range of expression used on Miguel is like... Chef's kiss.

(of course I was gonna trick you into reading another post about Miguel. Uh-huh that's what's about to happen)

Like... are you kidding me?

NAH DEADASS ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????

The whole later half of the movie hinges on Miguel looking buckwild crazy insane and they NAIL that. And like-

Oh my god what the actual fuck

?????????????????????????? I........ I have nothing to add. After that picture......Nah... LMAOOO

(left: actual photo of Moche watching this happen)

But Anyway chile, This movie is like.. genuinely a modern marvel.

If Marvel gave Tim Gunn 4 billion dollars and five years, whatever live-action rendition he would have made would not even compare to ATSV on any conceivable level - that's how good it is so jot that down.

And like...don't even get me started on Hobie..his design..his representation...girl I will start crying in this Arby's do not play with me

I just felt that needed to be said.

you get what I'm saying yall know what I mean iight coo

Here's a picture of Hobie to cleanse your palette.

Bye.

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the-autistic-vulcan · 9 months

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Green-Eyed Monster: Headcanons/Fic (Margot!Barbie x F!Reader) @barbiegirlharleyquinn

Request: Hi! Can I please request a Margot Robbie Barbie x fem! Reader where she’s dating Ken but this is around the time Barbie starts getting un-Barbie-like thoughts so she experiences jealousy?

Genre: Fluff; slight angst

warnings: jealousy

Description: Barbie as been feeling weird things lately, she mainly ignores them, but this time she can't - especially since Ken is getting a little too friendly

a/n: Reader is a Beach Barbie; i didn't do the actual dating thing

Barbie has not been feeling very...Barbie lately...

Flat feet, Cold showers, sour milk, burnt waffles and spontaneous thoughts of death have been clouding her

She doesn't feel like herself, but nothing short of a smile can't fix, right?

She's walking on the beach and sees you, surfing waves, with your hot pink surfer board, your green and pink two piece swimsuit and your lime green shades

"Hi, Barbie!"

"Hi, Barbie..."

"What's wrong, girl? You look...not smiley..."

She genuinely appreciated you, not just any Barbie, but you, cared about her

In truth, she's like-liked you for a really long time, and any time with you was spent laughing and talking each other through problems in this 'perfect world'.

"I haven't been feeling...right? I don't know...Cold showers, burnt breakfast...death thoughts..."

"Hmm, odd...I'm sure it's nothing too serious, right?"

Barbie and you keep talking and an occasional laugh is shared - even her cheeks were more pink than your surfboard

And then Ken shows up...

~~~~~~~~~

"Hi, Barbies!" He says, with a smile.

"Hi, Ken!" You and Barbie say simultaneously. He then approaches the both of you, places his surfer board down. He then turns to you.

"So, uh, Barbie, do you believe in love at first sight?" He asks, you're a little baffled by the question, but you wait for him to continue. "Or, should I swim by again to make sure?"

You and Ken laugh and tease each other, much to Barbie's sudden dislike. Suddenly she feels an odd feeling in her stomach - the way you're smiling at Ken, the way you twirl your hair when he's teasing you, your contagious laugh and how you fiddle with your fingers when talking to him - all of this is...new...she doesn't like it, but she feels it, rather intensely in fact.

Soon, Ken's beach buddies call him over. "Oh, well, I gotta go. Catch the waves, Barbie!" He runs off.

"Catch the waves, Ken!" You call back. "Right, now where were we-" You then notice Barbie's stare, she's looking at Ken, but not endearingly, more like...not-so-endearingly.

"Barbie, are you okay?" You ask.

"Hm? Oh, sorry, so sorry...I thought you were, hmm, talking to Ken..." She sounded off about the whole thing.

"Barbie, you don't really think-"

"I see the way you look at him...all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, giggling at his jokes and his silly smirk."

"Barbie," You take her hand in yours, "Ken and I are not a thing...I'm perfectly deserving on my own." You assure her. "Besides, Ken is not my type - he's too...Ken."

You both laugh and chuckle over Ken at his expense, never would something that silly come between you two.

"So, what do I do about...everything wrong happening?"

"I think we may need to pay Weird Barbie a visit."

----------------------------------------------------

Any requests, please drop them in my inbox!

Please like and reblog! Do not pass as your own.

#margot robbie #ryan gosling #barbie x reader #ken x reader #barbie 2023 #barbie #ken #barbie and ken #fanfiction #female reader

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edelgarfield · 4 months

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gods i haven't seen this parallel drawn before but it is something that drives me insane

everyone knows gortash was sold to raphael by his parents and one can only imagine the awful things he went through. and like i don't think it's too far of a stretch to think that abuse plays a heavy role in what led him to bane, how do you avoid being owned and used for other people's gain? by being the one with all the power and bringing them under your heel.

which is the exact same logic that drives astarion towards ascension. hells, the rite is a contract with mephistopheles, raphael's DAD.

imo gortash is a glimpse of exactly what lies in ascended astarion's future. he's the most powerful man in baldur's gate but he's completely alone. he's sold out and alienated every single person that ever cared about him, his power is the very thing that keeps him from ever being able to trust anyone else, all his allies are transactional and based on mutual gain, and one slip up means a knife in his back. durge, seemingly the one person he genuinely cared about, was taken from him because of the power they held. their affection for him put a target on both of their backs. he had all the power he could ever want and it did nothing to save the person he cared about most.

by the time you meet him, he is far far far too gone imo. i'm not even sure whether he cares about how isolated he is, or if he sees it for the weakness it is. if there was ever a time to convince him to choose another path, it is long gone, now he's too entrenched in his own schemes, that even if he WANTED to change (unlikely), it would spell his death.

if you don't ally with him, his isolation is the very thing that kills him; he believes he has no need of flesh and blood allies bc he has an army of tin soldiers to keep him safe. but once you take out the steel watch he's practically defenseless. he's the most powerful man in Baldur's gate, but you can literally just stroll up to his office and kill him on his own turf and no one comes to his aid. if you do ally with him, it's his ambition that puts the final nail in his coffin, his means to dominate the world turns on him and spells his doom.

and this is exactly what we begin to see happen with ascended astarion. his obsession with power and need for control makes him turn a genuine partnership based on love & mutual respect into one based on control. from party banter, we see pretty much all the companions immediately turn on him. these are people who genuinely cared for him & fought for his freedom, but after watching him ascend they wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire. and he doesn't even care! he's so entrenched in his own misanthropic worldview that he only sees the power he's gained & not everything it cost him. the cost of ascension isnt just 7000 souls, it's 7000 souls and the love of every single person who could have ever cared for him.

if astarion ascends how long until he bites off more than he can handle? how long until his enemies realize the best way to get to him is through you? how long until all his allies turn on him? (if you choose to control the absolute, the answer is somewhere between a few days and a few weeks). all the power in the world can't protect you from your own hubris and astarion has it in spades.

whether you view durgetash & durgestarion platonically or romantically I see it as two opposing narratives held together with Durge as the lynchpin. durgetash is abt being doomed by that narrative, two people who genuinely cared for each other but were the wrong people at the wrong time to save either of them. had they met earlier, if one of them had been slightly less entrenched in their roles, perhaps they could have been saved, they could have lived and had something real.

& durgestarion is the opposite, had they met any earlier, they would have brought each other to ruin. two doomed people, once beyond saving, meeting at the perfect time and finding the strength in each other to break their chains, to choose a path for themselves. where before durge failed to save gortash (& every person they ever cared for) they can save astarion now (& all their other companions).

& the real tragedy is by the very constraints of the narrative, you cannot save them both. if durgetash hasn't been the people they were, Astarion would never have his chance at freedom, he would've been consumed in cazador's ritual with no one to mourn him. but in order to orchestrate the events that allow astarion his chance at freedom, gortash is long past the point of no return. it takes MULTIPLE extremely unlikely events and literal divine intervention to free Durge from Bhaal's clutches. The chance of the same happening for Gortash is infinitesimally small.

it's abt the cruelty and chaos of the world, how fate, destiny, and chance intersect to either bind us or set us free. it's abt second chances, walking through the ruins of your past mistakes & choosing to build something from the rubble, it's abt how love & loss are two sides of the same coin, how sometimes the only choice available is to love, & that love won't save you, but it's there and it leaves its mark.

thank you for coming to my tedtalk.

#baldur's gate 3 #astarion #enver gortash #durgestarion #durgetash #bg3 spoilers

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ystrike1 · 5 months

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The Bondservant - By Jezz (8/10)

Finding solace in dependency isn't ideal, but I can't judge this particular couple for their choices this time. A slave and an unwanted daughter. What a toxic combination. When that slave returns with blond hair and a title I'm sure you can guess what happens.

Sioanna is a failure, and she doesn't understand why. Her mother died in childbirth, and apparently she was excellent. Everyone loved her. She was a legendary beauty, even though she was of low rank. Her modest match of a husband was handsome, and loving. Better than any boorish rich man. She bore a handsome son, but her perfect life was ruined by the specter of pregnancy.

Sioanna really isn't like her mother. She has a stammer. She's a loner. She comes from a countryside family with money, so she can't really buy her way into popularity. Her father and brother are both cold to her, so she lives in isolation. She lives trying to please them, so maybe one day she will get the chance to live glamorously like her mother.

She doesn't even seem to genuinely love either of them.

Her fruitless cute act is just that.

Both men are itching to marry her off.

Martha, the nanny, does what she has to do to help Sioanna survive. Her brother is a bit of a sadist. Martha gently encourages Sioanna to join him. To take part in the bullying. To be arrogant. To be the lady of the house any way she can. I don't think Martha is evil for doing this. Sioanna can't fight back. She's a woman, and even noble ladies have it rough.

Sioanna's brother likes to gamble. He likes to hit people, and he's extremely insecure. Men have it hard too. Being a countryside man makes marriage and money harder, and money is literally the only thing he cares about. He torments the servants because...gasp...Sioanna isn't a failure! They both are. Sioanna with her stammer. The great Heir Eli, with his anger issues and his gambling addiction.

Twaine resents them both. He wishes he had better children, but he's been dealt a dumb hand. He ponders about how he will use his children, when they're so weak.

Sioanna wants his love.

That's a mistake.

Cruelty gives Sioanna a drop of courage. Martha encourages her to be less submissive. She's only 16, but she has to do something. The clock is ticking. At this rate she will be sold into an unfavorable marriage. Twaine cannot be won over with love. Eli is a lost cause, who has been kicking his sister around the hallway since she was a toddler.

We meet Étienne.

Twaine brings him home. He claims the slave is a gift for both of his children. A friend. A sparring partner.

Twaine tries to drop a couple hints. He practically winks and says the truth out loud.

"Doesn't Étienne look like nobility?"

Sioanna is too scared to notice this hint.

Eli is too focused on beating the boy to a pulp to notice.

Twaine sighs. Étienne is clearly some kind of lost noble, who was sold into slavery for unknown reasons. Twaine found him by coincidence, but he recognized Étienne. Twaine is not the kind of man who would save another person, for any reason.

Étienne is money, or power. Possibly both, but Sioanna is completely unaware. She's dumb because she has been taught nothing, and she is constantly haunted by her brother.

Eli bullies Étienne IMMEDIATELY, and he does it hard. Sioanna joins in to entertain Eli. She believes it will make him less violent. She is trying to help Étienne....but she's also trying to help herself.

It backfires.

Eli orders her to beat him, hard.

Sioanna doesn't enjoy playing the part of the cruel lady. She hates looking at Étienne while he suffers, but it's him or her. Eli will beat both of them if she doesn't....do it.

It's not a shock when they become friends.

Sioanna is kind and beautiful under her stutter and her cruel lies. Étienne says he will be whatever she needs him to be. He looks at her like she is everything.

They do fight.

Their mutual obsession becomes hard to handle.

Étienne leaves, but he returns to take her as his bride, with the same obsession in his eyes.

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #webtoon #The Bondservant

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envirae · 10 months

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from the start — park jay

pairing: best friend!jay x gn!reader

genre: fluff

wc: 1k

warnings: swearing, pining, mentions of jungwon and yunjin from lsf, reader is super dense lol, not proofread! jay's listening to... from the start - laufey

"you're crazy. and i don't mean crazy in a wild and funny way like riki, i mean you're genuinely crazy if you think you'll be okay letting him get away like this." sunoo deadpanned. he was always good at being brutally honest with you, but that doesn't mean his bluntness was always appreciated.

"well what exactly do you expect me to do? we'll both be going off to uni in a month. even if he did feel the same way, long distance would never work out." you sighed. it feels as if you and your brother have this conversation almost weekly.

"you're like a broken record. every time you insist that things between you would never work out, but every time, i see the way you smile at him. i hear your laugh when he tells one of his stupid jokes, which— by the way are not that funny, and i hear you cry in your room every time he goes out on a date with another girl." you remain silent, unsure of what to say. you always hate it when sunoo is right. "i give you a lot of shit for your stupid crush, but you're still my sister, and i don't like seeing you in pain."

your phone buzzes on the bed, and unsurprisingly, it's jay. "i'm outside."

sunoo stares at the notification and gives you a knowing look before you stand up from his bed. "you don't have to do anything you don't want to. but, i don't want you to hold yourself back from doing anything you do want to do, either."

"thanks sunoo. i'll try to keep in mind what you told me." he sends you a soft smile as you walk out.

when jay sees you walk outside, he immediately exits the car and heads to the passenger side to open the door for you. "such a gentleman, aren't you?" you joke, getting into his car.

"well of course, only the best treatment for my best friend" he grins, closing the door after you and quickly returning to the drivers seat.

"where to?" you ask, putting your seatbelt on as he starts the car.

"i was thinking we could head downtown, a new boba place just opened up. we could get drinks and take a walk around the park." he knows that it sounds like your idea of a perfect day, and he doesn't have to look over at you to know there's a big smile on your face right now. though he still does, just because he wants to see your smile.

"you know me so well. i have the best best friend in the world." he hums in agreement and continues driving.

after you pick up your drinks, you leave the car behind and cross the street to go to the park. it's a sunny day, and the two of you walk around the park talking about whatever nonsense comes to mind.

jay's phone begins to ring, but his face turns sour when he checks it. he declines the call and puts it back in his pocket. "who was that?" you ask.

"just jungwon, he's nagging me to finish packing. i told him i'd get around to it."

you nod in understanding. "i thought it was yunjin." yunjin was jay's most recent love interest, and you let out a pained chuckle, not wanting to let jay know just how much you hate the thought of them together.

"oh her? we stopped talking a few weeks ago. she wasn't looking for anything serious, and you know how i am. i wanted more." he sighs.

"that's too bad, i know you really liked her." you attempt to console him, but he doesn't seem too sad about it.

"it's alright. things happen. it just shows that she wasn't meant for me. she tried to use the fact that we're both moving as a scapegoat, but i think it's bullshit. if you really like someone, and you want to be with them, shouldn't you put in the work to be with them? even if it's not easy?" he asks, almost a little frustrated.

the two of you walk in silence for a bit, and your breath catches in your throat as something in your mind says "fuck it. "

"i would." you mumble. you're incredibly quiet, but jay still manages to hear you.

"what?"

you've stopped walking now, and jay is standing directly in front of you. "i would put in the work to be with you, even if it wasn't easy, jay. to tell you the truth, i've been in love with you since we were kids. and i've waited for you this long, but i would a thousand years to be with you if i had to. you're the only person i could ever imagine loving."

you feel like you've just been pushed off a cliff, and you're bracing yourself for impact, unsure if the land beneath you is going to be soft, or hit you like a rock.

he stares at you, speechless. "why did you never tell me?" he asks with a shaky voice.

"i was scared! i knew you didn't feel the same way about me but i just had to tell you before we both leave. i never wanted to lose you but—" you start rambling, but jay cuts you off.

"i'm in love with you too, y/n. and i would also wait a thousand years to be with you if i had to."

now it's your turn to be speechless, but the silence doesn't last long. he pulls you in for a kiss. you feel like you must be dreaming, because there's no way jay has felt the same way as you this whole time.

when you both pull away, he pushes the hair out of your face and smiles at you. "i would wait an eternity to be with you, y/n, because that's how long i've loved you. and that's how long i will continue to love you."

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crehador · 2 months

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mulled it over for a while and ultimately decided i'm really digging this arajin-matakara fight, because like

the whole series has set up arajin as a piece of shit fuckhead (and i LOVE that for him) but this whole lying to matakara about wanting to be a honki people thing... is like the one thing he did not actually do

i get real rambly under the cut but tl;dr the way matakara treats arajin is the way arajin treats mahoro and that is suuuch a juicy parallel to me

throughout the whole series arajin has been not at all subtly trying to get away from these fights

could he have been more direct about that with matakara? sure maybe! but matakara was really ignoring all the signs that arajin is not who he thinks he is

which is such a delicious parallel to how arajin willfully ignores all the signs that mahoro is not into him

like. matakara built this version of arajin up in his head, with all these unreasonable, unrealistic, and honestly unfair? expectations based off some past foolishness from when they were very small children. he's clinging to this version of arajin that only exists in his head and has basically shown zero evidence of existing in real life

(yes arajin shows crumbs of courage but i think the scales are tipped pretty heavily towards his I DO NOT WANT ANY PART OF THIS moments)

this fight between them was like if arajin were to blow up at mahoro like "you've been leading me on this whole time!" when obviously. lol. no she has not

she did initially! just like tiny arajin as a child had those honki people ambitions! his ambitions may have been genuine, while mahoro feigned interest in him with malicious intent, but they're same in the sense that after that initial story beat, they have consistently demonstrated that actually no what happened back then no longer applies (whether because they grew out of it, in arajin's case, or they were faking interest in the first place, in mahoro's case)

but arajin is blinded by what he wants (mahoro) and ignores the reality of mahoro snubbing him at every turn, and matakara does the same, ignoring the reality of arajin really just... being extremely reluctant to have anything at all to do with him

anyway that's the main thing i'm chewing on and loving here, but ALSO i think the story paints this parallel in such an interesting way because like

matakara is just a big sweet ouppy dog of a boy! it's so so so easy to feel sorry for him, to root for him, to think the best of him. which i still do btw, in fact this episode made me like him more than i already did

because matakara is so uwu angelboy perfect, and arajin is such a dickhead, it's easy to instinctively think oh matakara must be completely right to be hurt and arajin must have hurt him. even if that isn't the case! this doesn't make arajin any less of a dickhead, but he's a dickhead mainly for other reasons

the fact that they've been set up as the perfect epitome of the Pure Boy and the Pervy Boy tropes is just such clever framing for this parallel between them, because i imagine a lot of viewers, if told what mataakara is doing to arajin is what arajin is doing to mahoro, would be like omg wtf no my pure angel baby is nothing like that disgusting freak?

except in this case! he literally is!! which is brilliant!!! i think it adds nuance to both matakara's character and arajin's character at the same time, making it so it's not just one of them is Perfect and one of them is Wrong All The Time

what's even better is that this made sense for matakara, like his reaction breaks him out of the Pure Angel mold but doesn't feel out of character. his emotions are already running high with what happened to his brother, plus akutaro is malewife mansplain manipulating him behind the scenes, so of course he feels like he's driven towards this emotional high that leads to this blowup

the groundwork was already laid out, and it wasn't even subtle. it was right on the surface! but this episode really highlighted how matakara's way of treating arajin is so much like arajin's way of treating mahoro and how inevitable it was that things would reach this point

(there are moments, even in this episode, that are in hindsight so clearly setting up this parallel! like arajin trying to talk to mahoro during lunch, mahoro CLEARLY not interested, making viewers think ugh arajin get a clue. then matakara often IMMEDIATELY coming in to try to talk to arajin, when arajin is the one who clearly isn't interested, making viewers think boo arajin be nicer to him! like i think the show deliberately set the audience up to have those emotional reactions, and this is the moment where the rug is pulled out from under us, so to speak, where it becomes even more obvious that... wait... double standard much?)

anyway. personally my only gripe with this episode is i wished they'd done more with aniki than just pseudo-fridge him, and hope they do still do more with him in the coming eps? but kind of understandable if they don't, because it is just a one-cour show after all

the actual blowup between arajin and matakara was just. mawh, chef's kiss. perfect

#crab watches #bucchigiri?!#this got verrrrrry long and rambly but i'm overall DELIGHTED by this episode #i didn't touch on this in the post (rambled on too long already lol)#but i really liked the framing of some of the shots and found they had a very theatrical quality to them!#like the confrontation between matakara and akutaro in the dark #but with the huge spotlight on them #felt like stage lights! i can so easily imagine this getting a stage play (in fact i would bet money that it'll get one)#anyway. still vibing hard with this and LOVE this matakara -> arajin -> mahoro parallel

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reverieaa · 1 year

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The self, fufilled.

It might have taken me a while, but as I promised in my last poll, I will deliver what you all were most interested in hearing, my explanation of the self fufilled. Consider this a pt.2 of "a change of clothes".

Yes, I say the self fufilled. I thought this play of words is not only interesting to do but would bring light to a new perspective that may help you come to your own understanding.

Many don't sit to really understand what " no other cause to your thoughts other than you" really means to them, we know, but we don't understand.

How do I stop my doubtful thoughts? How do I manifest quickly? how do I feel my wish fufilled? How do I change my state? How do I feel free? How do I stop punishing myself?

Well for the last one, you can start by putting an end to all previous questions, searching with the intention of finding an outside answer.

The opposite of love is hate, as the opposite of to hurt is to heal.

And the opposite of attention is indifference. As Edward art himself said that indifference is truly the answer to all your doubts.

I don't want you to go through your day and force yourself to imagine, affirm, and re-read every post you've ever read again and again until it finally clicks, I don't want you to fight every thought and scold your mind for "going out of place" either.

All that I want you to do is all that is required for you to do, change the inner. We truly are fortunate when I tell you this good news because change is all we do, all we've ever done.

I'll tell you honestly, not to give you hope and neither to shatter it or delude you when I tell you that majority of your problems that sound so complicated as the universe itself, could be solved just through self identification and a rearrangement of the mind.

I don't say this to give comforting lies, false hope, and support because I don't want people with hopes and dreams in tough situations to feel bad and be a moral person, but because the truth is far more comforting than any of it.

I won't tell you to "keep going" when you feel like nothing is working and breaking down. If you feel the need to change something, then change should happen, and it shall as your word is logic to your world.

I want you to understand that you're not meant to fufill the thing itself, but yourself instead. It's not about your desired face, it's about you, it's not about your ideal relationship and sp, it's about you, it's not about imagining the perfect life, it's about you.

It's not about using yourself to fulfill the scenario/desire. It's about it fulfilling and changing YOU.

Right now, you have a bed, you are not imagining that you do, you're not checking to see if you have a bed, you probably didn't even look to see if you have one, it is a CLAIM within yourself. With the same conviction, you use it for your desires. Take this example with things you have in your life.

I don't think people realize that the whole reason why trying changing the outer reality does not work because there is no outer reality to begin with, I mean that literally.

It is crucial to understand when you imagine that you are not creating the desire or a new reality, but you can only conceptualize that version of you to begin with because it already exists.

Let the ego mind go, let the need for outer change go, both its worries and time-frame of your life so far and just sit there with what I'm trying to say when I tell you to feel the wish fulfilled. It is a CLAIM, not a process, a change of identification.

Once you identify yourself with who you actually are, the awareness/ pure consciousness and believe that you is all there is , you won't want to "manifest a df" just to decorate the outer man, but you'll want to manifest it bc it genuinely makes u happy for yourself, same for every manifestation.

It all comes down to a satisfying claim, a claim of your observation that you see as TRUTH and are currently seeing in your mind.

For those who are wondering what knowingness I'm talking abt, it's the same knowingness when someone asks your name, you know you are (name), you know you're (nr) years old.

And so the same way you know your name, you know you have your desired body, the same way you know how old you are, you know you have your dream car.

We identify as body and outer when the outer world itself is WITHIN us, you are the answer to everything as everything has it's root to you, and at the same, everything cam only live through ypir awareness, nothing greater and nothing to "get".

If i view myself as pure consciousness, then I do not care for the 5 senses to show me anything because I don't view myself as just body, and this doesn't mean you can't deal with things in the 3D, because working in the 3D and identifying with it are different things. Therefore, don't feel the need to commit all your 5 senses to your imaginal act.

This isn't a for you to tell yourself: " ok, I have to know I am pure consciousness/ the creator and work with it from there" this post is telling you that you ALREADY are it, skip emotions here, we have established that you are it right now and youvare becoming aware that you are in imagination.

All we do in life is make claims within ourselves about things we are aware of having in the mind. Say you have a red car, and you think about it in your head, you know it's yours, you don't need to check your own drivers license, you know you have a certain hair color, it is a aware claim, you aren't trying to get it, there is no rush to do so, you are at ease knowing it IS so and are just observing your life through that state on consciousness.

And since you are consciousness, and you can get/be anything you want just by being aware that you are it, what is it that you can't do or be in this world? You can't be satisfied going after the "object" itself bc the only way we can enjoy things in this world is through the awareness that we have it, it has no life of its own outaide your own consciousness.

#law of assumption #affirm and persist #manifesation #manifesting #neville goddard #3d #affirmations #loa methods #void state #loa blog #loa

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leslutdepointedulac · 1 month

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Did Nicki really love Lestat?

I feel like there's sometimes a question in this fandom as to whether or not Nicki truly loved Lestat, or if it was all a 'ruse' of sorts. Some people will say that there was no love there, either at points, or just overall. But personally, I'm inclined to disagree. The way I see it, Nicki did genuinely love Lestat, especially at the beginning of their relationship.

They knew each other as children and, to an extent, they grew up together. This already puts them in a relatively close relationship with each other. This relationship between them starts out as just a friendship, but of course this evolves into something more.

When Nicki presents Lestat with the cloak, it's him who is acting rather flirty towards Lestat, not the other way around with him leaning into him and saying

"Only the impossible can do the impossible."

A week later when they're in the room at the inn, Nicki is the one who leans in and initiates that first show of intimacy, by kissing Lestat. Granted they were drunk at the time, but Nicki doesn't give me the impression he goes around kissing just anyone, even while intoxicated. I think the fact that they were drunk was just the perfect excuse/opportunity for Nicki to act on his feelings towards Lestat.

Further down the line, when they're in Paris - and at this point have been together for several months - Lestat returns to the theatre after his 'disappearance'. One of the first things the other actors do when Lestat initially arrives, is call Nicki to tell him that Lestat is back. And once he turns up to join the others in greeting Lestat, the actors immediately part to make way for Nicki to come through. I think they all knew there was a deeper level of connection between them. They share a very long and tender moment together, which the troupe allows without disturbance. Personally, I see that hug between them as coming from a place of love, heartbreak that they had been separated, and relief that they're back together again. Yes, Nicki had previously been, and still was angry and hurt that Lestat had supposedly left him, and without any warning. Especially considering Lestat was - as far as everyone else was concerned - perfectly fine during that time, only for him to turn up out of the blue with little to no explanation as to his whereabouts. I think Nicki's anger at this was partially down to Nicki being terrified at the thought he had lost his lover, and he couldn't hold his upset in.

Skipping forward to Nicki's turning, in my opinion, his very recently experienced trauma, combined with his already fragile mental state, were both amped up x100 by said turning.

The way I see it, Nicki got overwhelmed by the recent events and his mental condition clouded his mind causing him to lash out at the one person who he loved the most. Lestat. The reasoning for him lashing out at Lestat specifically, being because he was so immensely hurt by Lestat's disappearance, with him returning acting as though nothing had happened. This understandably angered Nicki, and mixed with his strong feelings for Lestat, it all bubbled up and exploded in their faces.

I think Nicki said what he said to Lestat during their last proper interaction, because he was deeply hurt and quite frankly, he just wasn't well. I don't think he was seeing/thinking clearly, and was probably also confused by the very sudden and drastic changes in his life. This led to him taking it all out on Lestat out of a need to blame someone for everything that had happened. Lestat just so happened to be the easiest and most obvious target for Nicki to let his anger out on.

Eleni tells Lestat in her letters to him, that even the mention of his name in Nicki's presence is enough to send Nicki over the edge. But I think this was down to his mental instability, along with his lingering hurt that had festered in his mind for so many years at that point; he wasn't in his right mind and so wasn't able to give appropriate reactions to his former lover.

Before Nicki goes into the fire, he gives his violin to Eleni, with the instruction to send it to Lestat. He also says how he had originally intended to give it to him the last time they saw each other, before Lestat left Paris. In my opinion, I don't see why Nicki would've had his violin that Lestat bought him, sent to Lestat, right before taking his own life. And there is a chance that he did this with malicious intent, as a way to taunt Lestat, but in my mind, I feel as though there was some lingering care left for him. I don't know that there was any love remaining on Nicki's part, I'll be honest, but I do there was some semblance of care left in him. I don't think this is something Nicki would admit to anyone, even himself, and I also don't know that he was aware of this - that it was more of a subconscious feeling. But I still think, regardless, there was something still in Nicki that cared even just a little bit for Lestat, albeit buried beneath the darkness in his mind.

Re: Nicki's interest in the violin and his comment about wanting to 'go down' in Paris, I think his initial interest in the violin was genuine. But when people around him *cough his father cough* told him to abandon the idea, that's when it turned into a thing of spite. However, I do believe there was still an honest love for playing. Even after Nicki had gone mad, playing the violin was something he turned to as a source of familiar comfort through his dark times.

As for Paris, it was Nicki's idea in the first place for both him and Lestat to run off (although, yes, it was more of a joke when he said it.) But I think he genuinely wanted him and Lestat to get away from the village that had been suffocating them both for so many years. When Nicki said he wanted them to 'go down', I think that was also as a result of his unstable mind, and his hurt at the recent events being taken out on Lestat. There may very well have been elements of truth in what he said, but overall, I think it's just yet another example of his inability to contain his pain.

Of course, none of this excuses the way Nicki treated Lestat in the end, but I think to simply say it was all because he didn't love Lestat is missing out on taking a deeper look into the reasons why he did and said those things. To denounce the love Nicki felt for Lestat seems unfair to me given his situation.

#this is something i've thought about an awful lot #can you tell i this is something that plagues my mind lmfao #this is the result of my moping over nickistat #lestat de lioncourt #nicolas de lenfent #nickistat #the vampire lestat #tvl #vampire chronicles #tvc #vc meta #my vampire chronicles

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artist-issues · 3 months

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A little late, but reading your take on Enchanted made me remember how much I love that movie. What are your thoughts on the rest of it? Like say, what do the Prince and Nancy represent? What about the villains? I’m curious how they fit into the allegory

Prince Edward is just like Giselle in the sense that he does what people accuse Disney Princes of doing, and it's funny--but it's rewarded by the narrative, because it's actually a good thing.

People think a Disney Prince is just some dumb hunk with no personality, because he's "just there to be the obligatory love interest so the girl can't save herself." But that's a twisted, hollow way to look at it.

Prince Edward is

Active -- he actually does something, not just in his spare time but when faced with a problem or a dilemma. Doesn't matter if it's troll-hunting or braving a strange world to rescue his bride or turning on a dime to fight his own step-mother when she turns out to be evil. He actually acts.

Keeps His Commitments -- When Prince Eric commits to Ariel he commits; jumps in the water to fight a sea-goddess single-handedly. When Prince Charming says he'll give his heart to Snow White but then she disappears, he won't rest till he's found her. When Prince Edward's fiancée disappears, he won't stop searching for her, either.

Genuinely Cares About the Princess -- People act like Princes in Disney movies are just obligatory--they don't actually care about the girl, there's no real tension or getting to know each other or whatever. That's such bull, obviously. In fairy tales, you cram a lot of nuance into a little scene. The Prince meets Snow White singing at a well and promises his heart to her; but it's after he hears her singing about her heart's fondest desires, after he observes that she's surrounded by doves that aren't afraid of her, after he notices she's just a scullery maid; and he still chooses her. Disney appeased everybody by adding in more rom-com moments with later Princes, like Aladdin and the Beast, but truthfully, Princes do what Princesses do; they know what virtues they're looking for in a good soulmate, so they don't need much to recognize it when it crosses their paths. Then they commit. Edward is willing to go on a date with Giselle. When she grows, he's confused, but he'll go with her. She doesn't sing with him anymore but that doesn't mean he ditches her. When she's cursed and be can't wake her he's 100% onboard with Robert doing it--because it doesn't have to be him, he just cares about her.

Has Just As Much Faith As the Princess -- One of the things Princes and Princesses use as the litmus test of whether or not they're soulmates in Disney movies is if they're both believers in the same Idea. Ariel and Eric are the perfect example. They both believe in something that everyone around them thinks is totally crazy. Eric believes in the fated, Right Girl. Ariel believes the Surface World can be worth loving. Those two things get united when they meet each other. Prince Edward longs to find the woman who's his other half, a companion who fits into his heart and makes his life more than just one quest after the other. (And he's so sweet about it.) He's very romantic. Giselle's been dreaming of her true companion, too. They have that in common, that faith that somebody right for them is out there. It just...so happens that that person isn't each other. But they're not wrong that someone is out there, which is why he is rewarded by winding up with Nancy.

Anyway. If Giselle is the Disney movie, so is Prince Edward.

And yeah, he's not quick on the uptake, he's super confident that everything he's doing is right, and he's definitely convinced that Nathaniel actually likes him. But that is okay. Because Edward is uncomplicated. He knows that what he's setting out to do is Right, so what bothers him is never "people here are mean" or "I'm not the hero in this world." Did you notice that? He's never bothered when he finds out he's not the hero. He's only bothered when the idea that Good won't win is threatened.

He's the first one to turn and look at Robert and go "unless...!" excitedly when he realizes his own kiss isn't working. No trace of bitterness. No suspicion. Just eager to solve the problem.

That's why he's great. His confidence came from being the champion of Goodness. Doing the right thing. He doesn't care if he's not the one who wins. He just cares that it's someone Good who's winning.

Then you have Nancy, who is the first of the "normal" people from our world to really give in to the idea of "True Love's Kiss" being a viable solution, right on the spot. Meaning there was space in her brain to believe in it.

I guess if I had to try to distill it, I'd say Nancy is just the reverse-Giselle. In the allegory (it's not all one-to-one) I would say...if Giselle (and to a lesser extent, Edward) is the Disney movie, and Robert is the skeptic, Nancy is us. She's not quite Giselle, not quite Robert...she's someone who wants to believe that the Disney Philosophy is true, but the problem is, nobody in our world believes it or acts like it.

She's looking for a fairy tale but she's stuck in our world. The moments where she's happy with Robert are moments when he's doing something an open-hearted, genuine, selfless and chivalrous Disney Prince would do. The kind of guy who knows who he is and knows what's Good and values Love, so he isn't ashamed or insecure to come right out and declare it.

Gentleness is power, under control. A man in love should have no fear of vulnerability, which again, takes faith—because love isn't about you. It's selfless. Why worry about how telling a girl you love her will make you look, will make you feel? So what if she rejects you; you thought she was worth loving, you gave her that enormous compliment--so what if she doesn't return it? You know who you are. You didn't need her validation--that was never the point of the love-declaration--it was for her. You kindly gave her the world's best compliment, good job, now on to other worthy things. It would've been great if she wanted the same outcome of that love as you did, but she didn't, and that's great too, because it was never that much about you. So you don't have to be hurt, angry, embarrassed, jealous, or any of the anti-love things we associate with bogus unrequited "love."

But in our world, men don't act like that anymore. Because it's all about you. Can't tell the girl how you feel because she might hurt you. How would you be hurt? By finding out she doesn't feel the way you would prefer her to feel about you, by mocking what you've deemed precious, etc. It's all about you, you, you, fear fear fear, etc.

Still, you can tell Nancy thinks she got as close as she could to the fairy-tale guy with Robert because in her first scene, when she finds Robert and Giselle together, she goes on that rant about how she thought he was "sensitive" and "protecting Morgan." Those are the traits she's attracted to; the idea that he wasn't protecting himself, he was protecting his daughter--the idea that he was careful with emotions for other people's sake, not his own--that he cared about emotions at all.

But that's not what it was, it was self-protection, over-planning. Still, the second he's willing to send her flowers or make any kind of heart-on-his sleeve, straightforward gesture of affection, she is SO ready to believe in him again.

She's the grown up who wants to find the Disney fairy tale in "real life" and she's doing the best she can with what she can find. Kinda like a lot of us who grew up on Disney and didn't want to accept the derisive cynical mocking of Disney as we got older, but what could we do?

But good news! It's real! The Good, the Beautiful, the True, exists, and it comes for her.

Then you've got Narissa, the villainess.

She's interesting because she's totally the opposite of everything the movie says is Good. Giselle and Edward wear their hearts on their sleeves—Narissa manipulates people's fondest desires for her own gain. Robert needs to learn to have faith—Narissa believes everybody is out to take what's hers.

Edward gives the gift of love freely, first to Giselle, then, unshaken when she doesn't give him the same, to Nancy—Narissa takes the adoration of people like Nathaniel and treats them like garbage in return.

I also think Pip is important, and it's important that Narissa is defeated by him.

She's brought down by the tiny chipmunk who's been treated with true kindness and friendship by the Princess. The chipmunk who can talk and understand what's going on and be useful, even in a world where people like Robert think there's no such thing. Pip is the unlikely "something wonderful will happen" in our world that Robert didn't believe in. He's the little, fairy tale element that nobody could plan for or calculate or control, coming in to save the day.

How very Disney of him. Ya'll get off of Wish. Disney's tribute to 100 years of fairy tale animation? It has nothing on Enchanted.

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tranquil-ivy · 8 days

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I think I genuinely found the perfect song for Leon and his wife as like "their song".

(Yes ik it's the song from Twilight but it's fitting!!!)

Now, when I think about them getting married I don't think they did a big wedding. They got married on a whim because Leon had vacation time coming up. They got married by a justice of the peace at a courthouse in front of everyone they cared about and rented a party room at a nice restaurant they really love just to have a good meal and be with everyone who matters.

They didn't have a cake, no flower toss, no first dance. But you did get to dress up, everyone did. Just shared their happiness with everyone. You had a honeymoon for sure though. 2 blissful weeks in Italy together, the vacation they'd planned on taking together. Just to have a romantic get away.

You promised each other that you'd do something special for your first anniversary but you got pregnant and Violet was barely 3 months old on your wedding anniversary that the thought slipped both your minds.

But one afternoon Leon's heading home from a particularly grueling case. Everything that could have gone wrong almost did. And of course he's sitting in traffic when all he wants is to go home an see his wife and daughter. The only thing sounds are the engine and occasional honks from idiot drivers. So he turns on the radio to fill the silence. He catches the ending of some other song. The radio dj coming on and talking for a bit, he reaches for the dial when piano keys fill the car. He just goes back to waiting, sitting back in his seat as he does so.

And my God does he get emotional... He doesn't know if it's the stress he's under or if it's that he can't stop thinking about how relevant everything feels.

He knows his life is hard, It's been hard since that night in Raccoon City and everything that's happened to him. All the people he's seen suffer and the awful things he's seen. But once he met you he finally had something good. Something that gave him hope.

His life changed so much in the past 5 years of being together. You loved him. You married him. You gave him the family he's always wanted and his life is barely over a quarter of the way through. He gets to come home to you and the beautiful baby girl he loves so much.

How could he not finally be thankful for being alive?

Because he gets to live not to just be a weapon anymore. He's got something to look forward to.

Your anniversary rolls around. It's almost midnight and you're prepping your lunch for the next day at work. As Leon walks into the kitchen. Doing his usual schtick of wrapping his arms around you and burying his face in your neck. Giving you the usual kisses with a tight squeeze so you can't escape his love as you squeal for mercy. He eventually stops his torturing affection and looks at the stove clock as you zip you're lunchbox closed.

Soon you're lifted from the floor being carried by the waist out of the kitchen.

"Leon! I'm not done yet!"

"It's our anniversary now so I get to do what I please."

"That's not how this works!"

He sets you on the floor, standing as you playfully glare at him. He hustles over to the stereo, plugging his phone in and turning it up, not loud enough to wake the baby.

"What're you doing?" You question, hearing the piano fill the living room as he hustles around the couch.

"What we should of done last year. Our first dance. He wraps his arms around you, pulling you close.

"Leon, we've danced since we got married."

"Yes, but we never picked a song! So just, dance with me and listen. Please? Pleeeease?" He bounces on place till you sigh and wrap your arms around him.

You just stare into each other's eyes while you slow dance. Swaying gently to the music as you listen. Both of you getting emotional by the end of the song. Tears streaming down both your faces. Still smiling as you hug him tight.

"Being with you was one of the best choices I've ever made. I love you so much."

#leon kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x fem reader #leon s kennedy #🌿 ivy writes #resident evil x reader #🏡 domestic life with leon kennedy #Spotify

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toomuchracket · 1 year

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the birthday party

(yo. first fic! a lil friends to lovers for the "write what you want week" trope night, hosted by @imightgetbetter! probably too long, probably a bit shit, but we move. the pic of matty below is what he looks like in my mind for this fic lol. enjoy!)

your heels crack off the concrete ground like peals of thunder as you run up the steps at the train station. the restaurant is just up the street, the strings of fairy lights in its window an oasis in the darkness of the february evening. you pause for a beat, shifting the strap of your bag further onto your shoulder and tightening your grip around the bouquet of yellow and orange tulips in your left hand, then continue your sprint towards the twinkling windows.

a red light at a pedestrian crossing hinders you for a few aching minutes. you slip your phone from your coat pocket and scan the screen to pass the time. your friends have replied to the message you sent to the groupchat berating your delayed train; it's cool, don't worry, these things happen, we'll order you a drink for you getting here. after heart-reacting as many messages as your freezing fingers will allow, you send another. off train, will be there in 2 mins x

green again. still clutching both your phone and the flowers, you run the final stretch of pavement, slowing as you near your finish line. the birthday girl is waiting at the door of the restaurant, her bare arms folded against her sequinned chest. her lips arch into a smile as you approach, panting slightly, and she opens her arms for a hug. you manoeuvre into it as best you can with your own upper limbs preoccupied, and speak into her shoulder: "thank you for coming out to meet me. i'm so sorry i'm late." you pull away from her hold, offering her the flowers. "happy birthday, bitch."

birthday girl's smile grows even wider, radiant, genuinely touched. "thanks, angel, you really shouldn't have," she says, taking the bouquet from you and inhaling the scent. "and don't worry at all about being late - we're all just happy you could make it. some more than others, i think."

her smile shifts slightly with the last sentence, into something more... knowing. you raise an eyebrow. "what's your point, exactly?"

"oh, nothing," she shrugs. before you can protest, she smoothes a bit of hair on the side of your head and interlinks her arm with your own. "you look beautiful, by the way. let's head in."

you let her lead the way through the semi-crowded restaurant to the table of your friends. a cheer goes up as they spot you, which makes you blush. birthday girl's fiance stands up to hug you and take your coat. "we saved you a seat up the end there," he says, with a slight incline of his head to the other end of the long table. "next to-"

matty.

you turn to the birthday girl, who simply smiles saccharinely at you, before she nudges you to the end of the table and a set of sparkly brown eyes. one of them closes in a wink as you approach, while the man they belong to slowly rises from his seat. your heart flutters involuntarily, and your greeting comes out as a whisper. "hiya."

"hi, darlin'," comes the reply, as he pulls you into a quick hug. you quickly inhale his scent, a strong mix of tobacco and aftershave, undercut with a hint of the weed he enjoys smoking so much; a scent so sorely him that even the slightest hint of it makes your knees tremble and heart race. here, now, breathing it in in its purest form, you think you might pass out if he wasn't holding you. "it's good to see you again. s'been too long."

"yeah," you inhale softly. you break the embrace, and trail your hands gently down to hold his own larger ones, calloused from years of guitar playing. he rubs his thumbs softly over the back of your hands as you take in his lithe, black-suited body and the mop of dark curls atop his (perfect) head. "you look lovely. really well."

matty's cheeks flush slightly, lifting into a smile uncharacteristically bashful for a rockstar of his calibre. "you flatter me too much, sweetheart. and you look beautiful."

you can feel your cheeks redden as you giggle awkwardly. "the birthday girl said the same thing."

"and for once in her life, she's right," matty replies, placing a hand on the small of your back - a gesture that makes your stomach muscles twitch into tension - and guiding you into the seat next to his. he keeps one of his hands on yours, though, even as you both sit down. "not like the time she got really into french new wave shit and tried to convince us all that cycling across paris on a saturday in july was a good idea."

the memory makes you chuckle. "no, the two of us were right that day. find a quiet restaurant, sit outside drinking for five straight hours, and laugh when everyone else shows up grumpy and sore."

"that was my favourite day of the whole holiday," matty says, almost dreamily, resting his elbow on the table and his face on his hand. "you and i weren't close until then, not really. was nice to just sit and open up to each other. i love doing that with you."

"i know exactly what you mean," you reply, glowing at his words. "getting little glimpses into your brain is my favourite thing."

matty's face changes slightly as you finish talking, the expression something you can't quite describe. the air in the room feels heavier now, as if your honest words are lingering and weighing it down; you try to blow them away by continuing to speak. "and that wine we had was fucking wonderful, too!"

the brown eyes fixed on your own restart their twinkling, as matty slides a stemless glass of burgundy liquid to you. it's identical to the one in front of him, albeit fuller. "speaking of..."

you gasp. "no fucking way."

matty winks at you, smirking - a deadly combination to your heart - clearly proud of himself. as he clinks his glass against yours in a silent cheers, though, his bravado disappears, replaced by something almost resembling tenderness. "i remember you saying it was the best drink you'd ever had. every wine list i read, i look for it. here's the first place outside of paris that they've actually had it."

jesus.

you take a sip of the wine first, to taste, then go back in for a longer drink. it's good, better than you remember, so good that your eyes close involuntarily in pleasure as the fruity smoothness makes its way further down your body, leaving a trail of warmth behind. when you reopen them, matty is still looking at you softly, pretty lips curved into a slight smile. it's the most tender moment you've experienced in a long time, and you don't want to ruin it by talking.

instead, you put down your glass and shuffle your chair as close as you can to his, pointedly ignoring the shiver that dances across your skin as your thigh meets his own, and pull him into another hug. this one is longer, slower, closer - your arms rest on his shoulders, his settle around your waist. with your face in such close proximity to his neck, his scent - already ruinous to you - is inescapable; it consumes you, fills your airwaves and clouds your brain until all you can think is matty, matty, matty. before you lose all sense of coherent thought to him, you murmur a "thank you" into his shoulder, and you swear his arms tighten slightly around you. you stay entwined for a bit longer, neither of you willing to be the one to break the hold. it's only when you hear an "oi! lovebirds! can we order now, please?" from further down the table that you both reluctantly pull apart, smiling sweetly at each other.

the dinner passes without incident, aside from the birthday girl breaking a lightbulb as she over-enthusiastically opens a bottle of champagne. you talk to matty, about his music and your writing and your families and new hobbies and the shit tv you've been watching, and also to the rest of your friends. it's a lovely night, so lovely that nobody really wants to go home after the plates have been cleared and the bill has been paid - when someone suggests continuing the evening in a bar down the street, the response is a unanimous "yes".

so you go, you continue your conversations and your drinking, although the bar doesn't have the french wine you and matty drank a bottle of together earlier, much to your disappointment. you even dance, with your girls, to the overly-bass-heavy songs blasting through speakers hidden everywhere in the dimly lit room. it's fun, absolutely, but you find yourself distracted, eyes constantly flicking to matty. he's so beautiful, standing at the bar laughing with the boys and absent-mindedly toying with his hair, that it makes your heart ache. when he pulls a lighter out of his pocket and makes a beeline for the back door, you're compelled by some supernatural force to follow him, shouting excuses about wanting fresh air across the music to your friends.

a quiet curse leaves your lips as you step coatless into the crisp winter night. at the noise, matty looks up from his phone with a furrowed brow, cigarette between his lips. when he sees it's you walking towards him, he takes the cig between his fingers and exhales the smoke far more attractively than should be allowed. "y'alright, darlin'?"

"mm-hmm," you reply, leaning opposite him against the wall. "just needed some air, is all. but i'll gladly bum a cig off you, if you're offering."

matty rolls his eyes. "not this shit again, sweetheart. s'not good for you. i don't want you adopting my bad habits, do i?"

you pout sweetly and bat your lashes. "please? just one?"

matty looks at you for a second, taking a long drag of the cig as if to taunt you, before he sighs. "listen," he starts. "if you're that desperate for a nicotine hit, i'll shotgun you. just this once, yeah? don't need you ruining your pretty lungs with these things."

"deal."

matty sighs again, but takes another long drag and leans down to your level, placing his hands on the wall beside your head. "open up, then."

ignoring the way your stomach jumps at his command, you part your lips as he exhales, taking all the smoke leaving his mouth into your own. neither of you move once it's done, though; you still lean casually against the brick wall, flanked by matty's hands, both of you breathing heavily, lips mere inches apart. matty's gaze flicks to your lips and back to your eyes, and then it happens.

you're kissing.

it starts sweetly, lips on lips and nothing more, but the wine from earlier emboldens you - daringly, you swipe the tip of your tongue oh so gently over matty's bottom lip. his breath hitches, and something within him just shifts. the cigarette is flung to the ground, forgotten, and his hands come up to hold your jaw as his tongue finds its way into your mouth. as you continue to make out, your hands clutch at the lapels of his suit jacket - whether to hold yourself upright or just to keep him close to you, you have no idea. all you know is that you're finally kissing matty, and you don't want it to stop.

eventually, though, the human requirement for oxygen means that it must. it's matty who pulls away from you first, although he looks physically pained to be doing so. his hands remain on your jaw, thumbs gently caressing your cheeks as he breathes heavily, adoration in those sparkling brown eyes of his. "you have no idea how long i've wanted to do that," he pants, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. "fucking hell, sweetheart."

panting just as much as matty, you smooth down his lapels and smile sweetly at him. "well, for me, it's been... wait, how many years has it been since we first drank that wine in paris?"

matty's eyes widen slightly. he giggles - the sweetest sound you think you've ever heard - and pulls you in for another kiss; still as passionate, but more tender than the first, with an underlying gravitas that makes your heart feel funny. this time, when he pulls away, he looks... nervous. "look, this might be too forward, and you can absolutely say no and it'll be fine. but i wanna ask you" he begins, his hands trailing down your sides and coming to rest on your hips, eyes boring into your own. "would you like to come home with me tonight? i would love it if you do."

you've never been more sure of an affirmative decision in your life.

#this is so wack #mads does writing #matty healy #the 1975 #matty healy fluff #matty healy fic #matty healy x reader #matty healy fanfiction #matty x reader #into the birthday partyverse

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