#garlic 101

[artificial-condition]

Growing Garlic 101

It's summertime and that means it's about time to order garlic! Garlic is one of the easiest vegetables I have ever grown, although it takes a while from planting until harvest. Most of that time is hands off, so garlic is something I would recommend to grow if you're new to planting and want something easy (or just want lots of yummy garlic)

What to know before starting

Before getting further, I just want to say that I am in hardiness zone 6b (near zone 7) in the US, so that is my growing experience (what is a/my hardiness zone?). To my knowledge and research, garlic can be grown in a wide variety of climates, including very hot and very cold ones. This post is going to be oriented around US geography and terminology because that's what i know

The first thing to know about garlic is that it is typically planted in the fall, but not harvested until the following summer. Why is it planted so early? Garlic goes through a process called vernalization, which means that it needs a cold period before in order to grow to its fullest potential. In garlic, vernalization is what causes the bulb to split into cloves (rather than just having one big chunk of garlic). The first year I grew garlic, I didn't know that it had to be planted so early so I planted in January. It did pretty good and I was happy with it! Some heads didn't have cloves and some did, so even if you get to it late you'll likely still have something yummy to eat by the end of it!

The next year I grew garlic, I planted it out towards the end of October and I had an amazing harvest! The bulbs were bigger and all had divided into cloves. All this to say, you'll have better garlic if you plant in the fall but if you forget or don't know and get to it late it'll be okay!

Step 1: Picking your garlic varieties

This is such a fun step!!! You can find all sorts of different varieties of seed garlic online, with different colors, tastes, and growing habits. My first year I started with seed garlic I found at lowes; the type I found was your generic grocery bought garlic, which for the most part is a softneck variety called California Early (or California Late).

Softneck vs. Hardneck

You should pick softneck or hardneck depending on the climate you are growing in. Softneck varieties do better in warmer climates while hardnecks are more cold hardy. In my zone 6b, I can grow both hardneck and softneck varieties because I am in the middle of the temperature range for hardiness zones. If you are in zones 1-5, hardneck varieties are recommended for your area while zones 8-12 softnecks grow better. If you are in the middle zones 6-7, you should be able to choose either variety and end up okay :)

Hardneck features

Hardneck garlic differs from softneck most obviously in that it will form a hard flower stem, often called a scape:

These are delicious and should be harvested before the flower opens, when they start to curl. They can be chopped up and used like other vegetables (they're also great in pesto I've heard). I roughly chopped mine this year and put them in a bag in my freezer so I can take them out and add as needed. They have a mild garlic flavor, more herby than the bulbs, and can be used in greater quantity without an overpowering garlic taste

Other differences in hardneck varieties is that they have larger (but fewer) cloves and the cloves peel easier.

Softneck features

Softnecks don't have the hard stalks and also keep good for much longer than hardnecks, so their stems and leaves are better for forming garlic braids:

Because of their superior ability to store well, softneck varieties are the type of garlic most commonly sold in grocery stores. There are much fewer varieties of softneck garlic than hardneck (only a couple dozen vs hundreds of varieties of softneck). There are more cloves in softneck garlics but the cloves are smaller and harder to peel.

Where to order seed garlic

Here are some good places I've found to order seed garlic:

Hudson Valley Seed Company

Johnny's Seeds

Urban Farmer (my favorite, I ordered here last year)

You can also just buy garlic from local farmers/hardware stores! They'll likely have varieties well suited to grow in your area.

Step 2: Planting

After you receive your garlic, keep it whole in the bulbs until time to plant. The general rule is to plant 6-8 weeks before your typical first frost date (where is that for me?), but I found that its okay to do it later than that, especially since climate change is messing with the dates. For reference, my average last frost date is October 11th but I didn't plant last year until October 22. Typically they are planted around September-November, the warmer your climate the later you plant.

Before planting, I recommend adding an inch or two of compost to the top of the soil. This will give them nutrients for the year ahead :)

If you are planting late or have pretty mild winters, one trick is to keep the garlic heads in the fridge (not freezer) for a month or two before planting. This will simulate vernalization and will help them to form cloves and bigger heads!

It is good to plant in a fairly sunny area. Mine has partial shade but they do great there!

When you are ready to plant, separate the bulbs into cloves. Try to keep as much as the papery skin on your cloves as possible as it helps to protect them in the ground, but don't beat yourself up about it. I plant mine roughly four inches apart, shoving them about two inches down with them upright (the hairy root end is the bottom and they taper to a point at the top):

After they're all planted, water pretty deep and mulch about an inch or two deep. This will help protect them from hard freezes in the upcoming winter. You can use whatever you have access to, I recommend things that will decompose so they add nutrients to the soil. I raked up fallen leaves from my yard last year and used those

Step 3: Wait

Now relax! The garlic won't be ready for a long time, so just let it do its thing. I don't really ever water mine because I get pretty consistent rainfall, but you can water periodically if you are in a dry climate. It is good to water before particularly hard freezes, it helps the bulbs have what they need to survive.

You might see the greens popping up if you have warm sprees in the late fall/winter. It is fine to ignore these, they will likely die back when it gets cold again but they will still come right back in the spring. You'll want to remove any heavy mulch in the spring when they start growing (my leaves had mostly decomposed so I didn't need to do this)

Step 4: Harvest time

I water mine occasionally as they are growing in the spring or summer, but for the most part I don't bother. I have fairly regular rain and garlic seems very resilient to water differences.

Your garlic will be ready sometime in May-August, depending on what varieties, when you planted, and your climate.

When it is getting close to harvest, it is natural for the leaves to start dying back a bit, especially with softneck varieties. You'll see the garlic scapes form on hardneck varieties, and will need to cut these off once they begin curling, before they flower:

For softneck garlic, harvest when about half of the leaves have yellowed and died off, starting with the bottom leaves. The tops may start to flop over when ready.

For hardneck, the appearance of scapes means they'll be ready in about 4-8 weeks. The leaves will die off as well, but not near as much as softneck varieties in my experience.

Do not water for a week before harvesting. You want your garlic to dry out some before harvesting :D

Since my garlic is in a raised bed, I have fairly loose soil. Therefore, I can just pull the neck of the garlic right above the ground to harvest my garlic. If you have more compacted soil, it would be best to dig around the clove some before you harvest so that it comes out whole and unbroken.

Congrats!!! Your garlic is ready!!

Step 5: Eating and preserving

At this point, your garlic is all out of the ground and ready to be eaten. If you have more garlic than you can eat within the next couple months, you'll need to preserve it. There's a lot of ways to preserve it, but I'll go over a couple I have done.

Idea 1: cloves in a vinegar

This one is primarily how I preserved my garlic last year and I'll be doing it again this year. It is very simple: just peel your garlic, place in clean jars, pour over hot boiling vinegar, seal, let cool, and store in the fridge! Make sure the cloves of garlic are completely submerged in the vinegar or you risk foodborne illnesses. The garlic has enzymes that prevent the cloves from absorbing the vinegar, and the vinegar prevents any bacteria from growing and causing the garlic to spoil. The cloves don't taste like vinegar and can be chopped and added to dishes as needed!

Idea 2: cure whole heads

This is best done with softneck garlic as they store better for longer than hardneck.

This is essentially letting them dry so they keep longer. After harvesting, keep the heads as is with dirt and leaves still attached (brush off any big dirt clumps but don't scrub them clean). Place the heads somewhere flat, warm, well ventilated, and shaded from too much direct sunlight (can get some indirect sunlight). This can be in a garage, on palattes, hanging somewhere, in a shed, whatever you have that seems best. I did mine on my front porch just laying on the concrete.

Leave them alone to dry for at least two weeks, then store as desired! You can trim the leaves and roots off and clean with a brush if desired, or leave the leaves and dirt and roots and store. I trimmed the roots off, left the leaves, braided them together, and hung in my kitchen:

(here is a video about braiding garlic) (note: it can only be done with softnecks)

Idea 3: make garlic confit

This is such a yummy way to use up garlic. Peel your cloves, add to a saucepan, cover in desired liquid oil, and cook on low until the cloves are soft and smushable. Store in the fridge after letting cool and eat within a week :)

Idea 5: Roasted garlic

Here is a recipe

And that's about it! Enjoy your garlic :D

@yourfriendfrogs

#gardening #garden #gardeners on tumblr #gardenblr #gardencore #food #garlic #garlic 101 #garlic guide #garlic tutorial #garlic how to #how to grow garlic #making this my pinned post for now because I’m proud of this lil guide I made #I need to figure out how to add a read more sorry anyone who hates the long scrolling #edit: figured it out

[thecatspasta]

So the finale line on michaels statement is 'That is who I am' and its so funny how Michael died bc he figured out who he was very funny how that happened hilarious in fact esp when his main line is:

#i am going to throw up and die #HE GOT THE DEGREE OF IDENTITY AND DIED #HE GOT THE IDENTITY #HE FIGURED OUT WHAT HIS IDENTITY IS AND HE DIED FOR IT #I AM GOING TO SCREAM AND DIE AND SOB #HOLY CRAP #tma #the magnus archives #garlic breath #michael distortion #michael shelley #michael shelly #the distortion #the spiral #tma fears #mag 101 #mag 47 #michael tma

[simplymariac]

From Season 1, Episode 101 Dark Knight. Schanke gives blood and his garlic breath to Nick. #ForeverKnight #GeraintWynDavies #JohnKapelos

This video clip belongs to Sony. Just sharing this scene for fun. FOREVER KNIGHT is owned by Sony Television. This clip is posted for promotional purposes only, and no infringement of copyright is intended or implied. Sony, This clip is a *non-profit* homages to your "intellectual property" and do not in any way threaten your right to it. You can safely consider this free advertising. So people out there BUY this show on DVD or buy it from your favorite streaming services where you can find it. This show is awesome. 🥰

#Forever Knight #101 Dark Knight #27th precinct #Blood Drive #Donald Fenner #Don Schanke #John Kapelos #Nick Knight #Geraint Wyn Davies #Garlic #Vampires #Blood #Toronto #Canada #Partners #Nicholas Knight #homicide #Detectives #Police #Nicholas De Brabant

[awesome-recipes101]

Duck Sauce

About 1 ¼ cups

This is a great sauce that you can easily make to dip your egg rolls in or anything else.

Ingredients

1 cup Apricot jelly (I used Smucker’s natural)

2 tablespoons rice vinegar

1 teaspoon Soy sauce, lite

1 teaspoon sweet Chili sauce

½ teaspoon garlic powder

Directions:

In a small bowl whisk together the Apricot jelly, rice vinegar, soy sauce, chili sauce and garlic powder.

Serve immediately (as if you couldn’t wait to dip your egg roll in) or cover and store in the refrigerator

Notes

You should be able to find apricot jelly in the aisle with other jellies and jams in well stocked grocery stores.

#food #apricot jelly #rice vinegar #soy sauce #sweet chili sauce #garlic powder #awesome recipes 101

[sa4phire]

Holy fuck.

#I just got creampied twice #story time later #time to eat raw minced garlic and Greek yogurt 🥰🥰🥰🥰 #might throw in some kombucha bc why not #how to not get infections 101 #also. go piss girl

[kitchenwitchery72]

Herbalism 101: Dill

EP. 5

Fun fact! "Dill" comes from an old English word that means "to lull" because it was often used to soothe colicky babies.

Associations: Money, luck

Uses in the kitchen

Most commonly used in Eastern European, Russian, and Middle Eastern cuisines, dill is used in a wide array of food. You most likely think of pickles, which uses the top part of the plant. The leaves or "aerial" part of the plant is used most of the time in cooking. It goes great in acidic and savory foods, as well as with food like salmon and eggs.

Uses in healing

I tend to used the seeds more frequently when it comes to herbalism. I will often chew on a seed or two to help with bad breath. Some people also use the seeds in a tea to help with period cramps.

Uses in witchcraft

Carrying seeds in a small pouch or your pocket will attract luck and money. Similarly, using the herb in cooking with intention will attract the same. Because you can buy it dried for the kitchen, I love using it in spell jars.

Tips for growing at home

Dill is resilient and can grow in most climates in summer. An outdoor pot or garden is best though, because it can get tall. It is a great companion plant for cabbage but not carrots!

Recipe

One of my favorite family recipes is super simple and tasty. Dill dip is something we always have at family functions.

You need:

2 part sour cream

1.5 part cream cheese

1/4 part dried dill

1/4 part garlic powder

Mix and enjoy with Hawaiian rolls !

#herbalism 101 #herbalism #kitchen witch #witchcraft #green witch #cottage witch #herbs #spellwork #herbalmedicine

[ruskandruskin]

🪔 desi me rolling 101

indian food mei itne sari variety ki dishes hai aur inn foreigners ko sirf samosa, butter chicken, garlic naan aur mango lassi ko hi exploit karrna hai.

#desiblr #desi tumblr #being desi #desi tag #desi shit posting #desi side of tumblr #indian tumblr #desi aesthetic #desi teen #just desi things #desi truth #desi #desi memes

[withahappyrefrain]

Every Rose Has Its Thorn

Pairing: Mob!Peter and Mob!Reader

Summary: For @liz-allyn's 900th celebration! "What are we going to do about this?" You're caught red-handed and Peter's next move could destroy your life. Unless...you can convince him otherwise."

Warnings: Literal murder, swearing, oral (f receiving), smut,

Words: 5.8K because I can't help myself

He grumbled as he took the plate of food from you. Something about it taking too long.

Normally you'd roll your eyes. 

Instead you smiled and began counting in your head. 

101, 102, 103, 104

"How much garlic did you roast the other day?" Your father asked. 

"Just three heads for dinner." 

He sneered, "You added too much. The whole house stinks of it." 

He had been complaining of the smell for the past week. You claimed it was good for the heart. 

It also fooled him into thinking that the odor was coming from another source, not himself. 

206, 207, 208. 

You handed him another glass of water- the third one in a row. You watched as he chugged the water- colorless and odorless. 

The almond taste was a myth. Lucky you, as your father didn't have a huge sweet tooth. 

He continued to demand water, claiming you added too much salt to his food. You simply apologized. You didn't mind. 

It would be the last time you would have to apologize to that piece of shit. 

362, 363, 364. 

"Why don't you try going to the bathroom?" You suggested as he doubled over, bemoaning about his stomach pain. 

"It was that food of yours. Don't know why you insist on cooking when you always fuck it up." 

You walked him to the bathroom, shutting the door. He was in such pain, he didn't even noticed that the doorknob to the bathroom was different. 

It now locked from the outside. 

520, 521, 522, 523. 

The dumbass finally figured out that the door was locked. He was calling out your name. 

But you couldn't hear. Unfortunately, you had on your headphones as you cleaned up the kitchen. It had to be clean, otherwise he'd be angry at you. 

Such a shame. 

616, 617. 618. 

You pulled an earbud out. Daddy dearest was still yelling, but not about the door being locked. 

Something about being in pain. 

It was hard to hear with the music. 

766, 767, 768. 

With your earbuds still on, you grabbed your water bottle. Peering out of the window, you saw your neighbor, Ms. Boocock-Lee, step outside her door. 

Not thinking much of it (according to Dad, you never thought), you stepped outside, stopping after a few steps to look for your keys. 

A loud voice was heard over the music. You ripped a headphone out, looking up to find your neighbor, smiling from her lawn. 

You waved and gave a cheery hello. 

"Where are you headed to honey?" She asked with that sweet saccharin smile that made you want to gag. 

"Oh, just heading off to the pharmacy and bank. Gotta make a few deposits and pick up some medication for my dad!" 

"Have they figured out the cause of that constant sore throat?" She asked. 

The corner of your mouth turned downward as you shook your head, "Not yet. Hope these new meds will do something!" 

After more idle chit chat, you two went your own separate ways. 

You made a mental note to thank her later, for when she volunteers to be your alibi. 

Once you go to the pharmacy, you aren't as good as counting consistently. Had to stay focused on fulfilling your role as the loving daughter. 

Such a shame your father left his phone in the kitchen. Had he actually had it, maybe he could have called you to come home or call 911. 

Not that you would have answered. 

It's once you get to the bank that you begin counting. 

756, 757, 758.

"Usually deposit?" The Teller asked. You nodded your head, bringing up a hand to rub something out of your eye, the plastic pharmacy bag now visible. 

These deposits were nothing unusual. You had been doing them for your father for years. He'd move money around, you'd picked it up, he'd give it to pay somebody off. 

It was just such a shame his memory had gone downhill over the past year. He'd forget if he had sent you to the bank or not that week. 

He'd always insist on you going. And lately, he started sending you to drop off the money. 

The nicest thing he's ever done for you was making this so easy. 

875, 876, 877, 879. 

When you got back to your father's house, you were greeted with silence. 

He did say he had a meeting later that night. And keeping his car parked in the garage made it impossible to tell whether he was home or not. 

So you dropped off his prescriptions on the kitchen counter. His keys were still there, signaling he hadn't left yet. 

Curious. Quite curious. 

Carefully turning the lock, you heard a click. It was now unlocked. 

888, 889, 890. 

You called out your father's name, which was met with silence. 

Two knocks on the door. The second one was more forceful, opening the door ever so slightly. 

The smell was horrendous, making you gag. After pulling your shirt over your nose, gasping in the fresh air desperately, you opened the door all the way. 

895, 896, 897.

Finally gathering the strength, you fully opened the door. 

898, 899. 

The sight was horrific. No amount of research could have prepared you for it. 

900. 

Though you still got pleasure from seeing your father's dead body. 

The next two hours were a blur. You could hear the sounds of an ambulance, Mrs. Boocock Lee wrapping a blanket around you as she asked your questions. 

You were in shock. 

He was finally gone. 

After giving a statement to the police (not that they were really looking for the cause of death, moreso connections to your father's business), you went home to your little apartment. 

It was all you could afford, with your father's refusal to give his only child any money, along with the odd jobs and hours you had to work since you were his unofficial caretaker. 

But you wouldn't be there for much longer. 

Now that you would get the inheritance your father hadn't blown away on shitty business deals and gambling. 

While it wasn't much compared to what he started with, it was enough for you. 

You switched the lights on, illuminating your apartment. 

Which was why you jumped upon seeing a man on your couch. A choked gasp escaped your lips, your feet beginning to step backwards as a hand of yours extended behind you, reaching for the- 

"Got the news Scheifele" Peter Parker's voice was smooth and rich. There was an air of amusement laced through his words as looked at you with a twinkle in those whiskey eyes. 

You ignored his nickname for you, the one he bestowed the first time he met you. He was amused with how you looked the opposite of your father's towering, greasy demeanor. 

"She's like a little lamb. A beautiful sheifale." 

"If you're here to send your condolences Mr. Parker, I'm afraid this is not the best time." You gripped your car keys as you took a step into the kitchen, a step closer to the living room. 

Peter Parker was elusive. He kept his heart hidden behind those tailor made suits. Those honey dripping smiles he'd give you were an act, you could see right through him. 

"I'm not here for condolences. I'm here to congratulate you," He said, his mouth forming into a smirk. 

"Mr. Parker, I don't know what you're talking about but please-" 

"After knowing me for over a year, you still can't call me Peter?" His lips formed into a pout. 

He made it sound like you two had something beyond a professional relationship. 

Your dad had done business with him for years. Once his health started going downhill, you had begun dropping off checks (or dead bodies) at Parker's. 

"Well, Peter, like I said now is not a good time-" 

This time he stood up, hands still in the pockets of his well tailored pants. You couldn't help but grip the keys in your hand as he walked over to you. 

"Drop the act Scheifele." His words made your blood run cold. 

"I-I don't know what-" 

Your eyes widened as Peter pulled out an empty bottle. 

"Word from the wise: throw the trash out before you kill somebody." 

He was too fast. One of the many skills he had that made him stand out as a hitman. Your back was now pressed against the wall as he had one hand pinning your waist to the wall, another wrapped around your wrists, which were now over your head. 

Your feet dangled off the floor. 

You always wondered how he was so strong. He wasn't built like a brick shithouse, and yet he could toss you with great ease. 

Another skill that helped him rise up quickly in the ranks, made him sought after by your father and countless others. 

Peter simply chuckled at your attempts to push back. You cursed at him as he laughed. 

It was baffling. You knew he hated working with your dad, he would tell you all the time. Granted, it usually followed with a comment about how you were much prettier than your father. 

"How long?" He asked, studying you like you were some kind of bug under a microscope. 

"For a year now. I've been putting it in his food and the water for a year now," you admitted. You were trapped, no use in denying it. 

"Must have made some pretty good connections to get a hold of fucking arsenic." The scent of cinnamon was filling your nostrils. 

He always smelled good. 

The hand he had on your waist moved up to cup your jaw. As if he could sense that you were about to lurch forward, he pressed his body against yours, pinning you to the wall. 

You couldn't remember the last time you were this close to someone. It almost left you breathless. 

Almost. 

"You're the one who keeps saying I'm much better to work with," You spat. 

"You did this for a whole year?" 

You nodded, "Gave him a steady decline. Created a paper trail for doctor visits." 

"That's why you always carry that big water bottle around, isn't it? So you never had to drink the water in the house." Peter always paid attention to the details. 

It's how he knew you weren't as oblivious as you let on. 

You nodded, "They'll send in some water samples. It'll show as being contaminated." 

"Which will give you the perfect case against the company. The death of your father is sure to give you a nice payout," Peter cocked his head to the side, "Granted, if they found out about what you did, that's a pretty big case for them." 

The possibility always dangled in the back of your mind. It's why you began planning this almost two years ago, working out every detail, making sure things happened when they were supposed to, ensuring your tracks were covered. 

And there was Peter Parker, holding that bottle. The one that had your fingerprints all over it. 

Once they found the bottle, your plan would unravel. Why did you have to be impatient? Why increase the dosage, when you could have waited for it take over naturally? 

"What are we going to do about this?" Peter hummed, his nose grazing your cheek. 

The fate of your life was in Peter Parker's hands. He had the ability to keep this a secret or send you to jail. 

"What do you want?" You whispered. 

He moved a hand down to your waist, gently guiding your feet back on the ground as he let go of your wrists. His broad shoulders were still against yours, keeping you in place. 

A ringed hand trailed down to your face, his thumb running across your bottom lip. 

It was almost sweet. 

Almost. 

"Name it Parker and I'll give it to you. You want the name of the guy I got it from? A percentage of my settlement money? You wanna fuc-" 

Two fingers entered your mouth, cutting you off. The cool metal of the rings rested against your lips. As he leaned in, his thigh that he had slotted between your legs hitched up, brushing against your clothed core. 

You never wore a dress around Peter for this very reason. You hoped he hadn't heard the way your breath hitched, how you almost gasped around his fingers. 

But somehow he had such good hearing. The smirk on his face said it all. 

"I want a partner," His lips were against your neck. The bastard knew that made you weak, the way his beard would brush against your skin. 

Why did you ever tell him he looked good with facial hair? Maybe your father did have a point about you not knowing when to shut up. 

"The kind that's made known by a pair of gold rings?" You asked, desperate to give off the image that his actions left you unbothered. 

Peter chuckled, "That's a little soon, Scheifale. Let's have dinner first." 

His body was off of yours, only briefly. Only long enough for you to step away from the wall. Only long enough for you to think you had a chance of running away, for him to dash that hope by wrapping an arm around your waist.

"You've had a long day and we have a lot to discuss. We need to get back to my place." 

He led you out of your apartment, where you were greeted by his right hand man and woman.

Felicia and Miles just smiled at you. 

Assholes. 

—------------------- 

You had been to Peter Parker's house before. You were familiar with the grand staircase that greeted you when you walked through the door. The marble floors in the bathroom. 

The dining room table, where you two would go over payments and plans as you drank wine. As of recently, the conversation would stray from business and focused on other things. 

Childhood. Interests. Funny stories. 

How he could help you get away from your father. That you would be safe with him, he'd make sure of that. 

Everytime it was brought up, you would just shake your head. He didn't need to get involved. You could hold your own. 

Was that why he was doing this? You had actually succeeded without his help. Without his knowledge. Did that make him angry? Feel betrayed? 

"Are you angry at me?" You asked as he drove. 

Peter's brows furrowed in confusion as his eyes stayed focused on the road ahead, "Why would I be angry?" 

"Because I got rid of him without your help." 

Peter rolled his eyes, "I never said you couldn't do it without me. I just offered assistance in case you needed it." 

You almost felt bad at your accusation. 

Almost. 

"So then why are you doing this?" 

"Because as smart as you are, you still have a lot to learn," He pressed a button, opening the gates to his house, "As much as everyone hated your father, he was still a prominent figure in all this. When you get rid of someone, you gotta make sure you have some alliances first to protect your ass." 

You huffed, "Why would I need protection, no one is gonna think I-" 

"In this business, you treat every death with suspicion. No matter how many alibis, witnesses, and reports." 

Peter now had a hand on your thigh, his fingers gently gripping the soft flesh. After parking, he leaned in, the smell of cinnamon greeting you once again. 

"And maybe I am a little sad you didn't contact me after he died." You hated that smirk. Hated how charming it was. Hated how it made your thighs clench the first time you saw it. 

"Peter Parker gets sad? This is good information for me to know as your new partner," You leaned in, his face now inches away from yours. 

"Oh Scheifele, you're gonna learn a lot about me." His thumb came up and ran along your bottom lip. 

You wished he'd stopped doing that. You could say so and Peter would listen. 

Yet, the words didn't come out. 

Which is how you found yourself in Peter's office, planning out the details of your father's funeral. 

You were honestly surprised. As soon as you walked into his house, you expected him to shove you against a wall, take you right then and there. 

Instead, he was actually helping. 

It was a lot more work than you realized. Knowing who to invite, where to seat them, who to keep away from who. 

"Why the fuck are you inviting the Osborne's?" Peter asked, running a hand through his hair. He was sitting in his leather chair while you lounged on the couch. 

"The family used to work with my dad, they were on friendly terms," you explained. 

"They're trouble and you know it." 

"The son is always sweet to me." 

Peter's brows furrowed as he chewed the inside of his cheek. He wanted to say something, it was clear as day. 

So, you being curious, kept pushing it, "He texted me when he got the news that my dad kicked the bucket. Said if I needed anything, to let him know." 

His jaw tensed, his nostrils flaring. 

"Y'know, you could have sent a text-"

He lunged forward, his hands pinning yours against the soft leather pillows on the couch. 

Now he looked angry. 

"Harry Osborne is a piece of shit, just like your father. Is that what you want? To repeat the awful, shitty cycle that led you to fucking poison a man?" 

You shrugged, secretly gleaming that you had the upper hand, "I got rid of one shitty man, I can do it again." 

"Or you can be with someone who doesn't make you want to commit murder," Peter spat. His whiskey eyes were hardened and narrowed in on you. For a moment, the only sound in the room was yours and Peter's heaving breathing. 

"Or specifically, I could be with the person who fucking blackmailed me to be their partner. Is that what you want?" Your tone was nearly mocking as you threw his words back in his face. 

"You wouldn't have come with me otherwise, which would have meant you would be home alone when Craven came to your apartment, looking for you." 

"Bullshit-"

"Miles and Felicia are there right now, taking care of him. Did you know your father owed him money? No, you didn't. I'm trying to help you," He gritted through his teeth. 

The idea of receiving help always made your stomach lurch. Thanks to Daddy dearest, you were raised on the concept of looking out for yourself. 

Which, looking back, is probably what made it so easy to kill the man. No one else was keeping tabs or track of him. 

So Peter had a point. So what? 

"Right, and you get absolutely no satisfaction that I can't leave you. That now you can have me whenever you want, to-"

"You know I wouldn't do that." His voice was firm, but not angry. In fact, he looked hurt by your accusation. 

"Oh please, all that flirting-" 

"It takes two to tango. I wouldn't have kept flirting if you hadn't flirted back."

He was right, but you couldn't let him see that. Peter Parker couldn't know. 

"You're just angry that I won't let you be my savior," your voice was but a whisper, though that didn't stop the venom dripping all over your words. 

"I'm angry because that piece of shit you called a father got into your brain and made you believe you're not worthy of someone who likes you, who actually cares about you." 

His voice was soft. The grip he had on your wrists was gone, his hands now intertwining with yours. 

"And you think you're worthy of me?" Your voice was gentle, barely above a whisper. 

It wasn't meant to mock Peter, it wasn't meant to hurt him. 

It was a genuine question. 

His forehead brushed against yours, his soft hair tickling your skin, "I'd like to try." 

Peter Parker was vulnerable, underneath the rings and designer suits and devilish smirks. That's what drew you to him, what made you stay with him, long after your meetings had ended. 

"Show me then," you demanded.

Peter's lips were soft against yours, despite how he was kissing you with such fervor. His hands cupped your neck, his long fingers reaching to the back of your head. Despite literally trapping you, you felt safe. Something you hadn't felt since god knows when. 

His body shifted towards you, deepening the kiss. His tongue ran along your bottom lip, as if it was asking for entrance. You parted your lips, granting him access. He followed your lead, your tongue slipping against his as your fingers weaved into that soft, thick hair of his. 

It was intoxicating-his smell, his touch, his lips. You couldn't help but arch into him, trying to mold your body against yours. 

He broke away first, which surprised you. His lips trailed up to your ear, pressing small kisses into your face along the way. 

"You've had a long day. Should go shower and change." His breath was hot on your skin, sending shivers down your spine. 

"I don't….I don't have any c-clothes," you could feel the heat in your face as the sensation spread through your body. 

"Felicia is picking up some of your clothes after she takes care of Craven. But until then…..I got something for you," you didn't need to see his mouth to know that smirk was there. 

“You got me clothes? For this meeting?” You leaned back so he could see the glare you were giving him. 

“If you must know, I got them after your last visit with me,” He admitted, his voice soft. 

Ah yes. The last visit. The one where he said you didn’t have to go back to your father, that you could stay with him. 

And in an attempt to get out of there, to avoid what he really meant, what he was saying through those big whiskey eyes, you mentioned something about not having any clothes and ran out the door. 

“Trying to make it difficult for me to escape?” Your fingers played with the hair at the nape of his neck. 

“Also thought you deserved something nice, “ Peter’s voice was sweet, like honey. It was such a contrast to his hands that were now kneading the soft flesh of your thighs. 

"Look, you can just give me an old Tshirt and-"

"Listen, Scheifale. You're going to take a shower, put on what I give you, and I'm going to show you how good I can make you feel. Got it?" 

The order sent heat directly to your core. All you could do was nod as Peter helped you off the couch. 

—-------------------------- 

"That bastard," you muttered as you stared at the 'clothes' laid out for you. 

You knew they wouldn’t really be clothes. Like Peter Parker would pass up a chance to see more of you. 

Your fingers traced over the lacey, sheer fabric of the ‘romper’ that was hanging on the hook of the bathroom door. Could you call it a romper when it would barely conceal your tits and ass? 

The color was nice. Soft pink. 

Your favorite. 

While showering, a maid had taken your other clothes, leaving you no choice. As you put on the sheer, flimsy fabric, you couldn’t help but look at yourself in the mirror. 

It was nice. Something you didn’t buy for yourself, usually because you either didn’t have enough money or just didn’t think you deserved it. 

Pulling on the robe, you couldn't help but press the soft material to your nose. 

It smelled like Peter. 

Taking a deep sigh, you opened the door. The walk from the bedroom to the office felt long, daunting. 

You found Peter sitting in his chair, looking over some papers. 

"So what made you decide on lingerie? Usually I just sleep in an old Tshirt and shorts," you commented. 

"I wanted to get you something nice." He walked over to you, his hands in his pockets. 

"Do you not like it?" He asked, motioning to the robe. 

You rolled your eyes, "I didn't think your staff wanted to see my half naked with zero warning." 

"I sent them home," Peter's lips were now pressed against your forehead, his fingers trailing down to the tie that was holding the rope together. 

You stepped back, "Why am I the only one in less clothing? This doesn't seem like a very fair partnership." 

All he did was grin as he took off his jacket and began loosening his tie. 

"More," you demanded. 

"And you say I'm the horndog," Peter muttered, taking off his shirt to reveal a white undershirt beneath it. 

"Why do you wear so many layers? Don't you get hot?" 

He ignored your question, walking over to the couch. He sat down, kicking off his shoes before he slowly pulled the white Tshirt over his head. 

Peter Parker was attractive. You knew that. Everyone knew that. And yet there was something about seeing him like this, shirtless, long legs spread out. 

"I….I didn't know you had tattoos." 

"You can look at them if you want, Scheifele." He curled a finger, motioning for you to come to him. 

Wanting to maintain the upper hand (or some semblance of it), you walked over slowly, untying the knot. 

You stood there, in between his legs as the robe fell to the floor. Peter's eyes widened briefly, then relaxed as he took you in. 

"Look at you," He cooed as a hand traced over the lace on your hips. His other hand trailed up your stomach, resting right below one of your breasts. 

"Spin around." Your eyes widened at the demand. 

"I'm sorry, what?" 

Peter was unphased, "You heard me. Wanna see how it looks from the back. If it's good, I can get you more in different colors." 

You were ready to tell him to fuck off, until you remembered he had that little bottle of yours. The one that would destroy your life if someone else's hands ever got ahold of it. 

So you slowly spinner, allowing his eyes to burn into your skin. 

"You don't need to be shy. You look pretty. You can look too, if you want." It was difficult to hold onto your anger when his voice was so soothing. 

You straddled his waist, taking in the sight of his bare chest and shoulders. Your fingers traced along the sections of inked skin. 

On the top of his left shoulder was an intricate spider web, cascading down to his back and the very top of his bicep. You leaned over, trying to ignore his lips that were now pressed in the valley between your breasts, instead focusing on the small spider that dangled from the web, going down part of his back. 

"Were you one of those kids obsessed with spiders?" Peter let out a low chuckle against your chest, sending vibrations that made your stomach flutter. 

"It's several things. My parents were scientists and studied animal and other species' DNA to see if they could find missing links for medical treatments. Mainly they studied spiders. Did that until the day they died." 

Your fingers traced over his skin as the story played in your mind, your brain memorizing the details he had given you. You had learned details of Peter here and there. He always wanted to focus on you, to listen to what you had to say. 

It was nice to hear him talk about himself. 

Your eyes noticed another section of ink, your fingers tracing over the symbols inscribed on his right bicep. 

"Is that Hebrew?" You asked. He nodded his head. 

"Gam Ze Ya'avor," Peter told you. You looked at him, your confused expression alerting him that you had no idea what it meant. 

"This too shall pass. Got it after my Uncle Ben died. Figured it would be a good reminder," He explained, his voice soft. 

"It is a good reminder. What about this one?" You picked up his hand, motioning to his forearm. A band of old film was wrapped around it.

"I did photography in high school. Still do it from time to time," He shrugged, "My Aunt May says I could have worked for The Daily Bugle." 

"You ever thought of getting them filled in with something?" 

Peter shrugged, the tips of his ears turning red, "Yeah…..thought it would be neat to fill them with important dates." 

"Such as……" your voice trailed off. 

Peter looked up at you, a sheepish smile taking over his face, "Wedding dates….birth dates of my children." 

"Is that what you want?" So often you met men in this field who did those things to prove something, like that they could have anyone they wanted. Or to continue their name, to have a successor so their legacy could leave on. 

Selfish reasons. Your father was one of those men. 

But when Peter looked at you with those soft amber eyes, it didn't feel selfish. 

"Yeah, I do. What about you?" 

Your fingers traced the inked skin on his arm before guiding your fingers back to his shoulder, back to the spider web. You leaned down, pressing a soft kiss against it. 

"Yeah, I want that too," You whispered into his skin, "Partly why I got rid of my old man. Couldn't have that with him around." 

Peter nodded, bringing your fingers up to his lips. It was a stark difference compared to when he found you in your apartment earlier today. 

Perhaps that's why you liked him. He could have killed you, could have ratted you out. 

Instead, he just brought you home, even when you didn't realize that's what you wanted, what you needed. 

"If I remember correctly, you said you were going to show me how good you can make me feel," Your voice was light, a smirk slowly spreading to your face. 

"I still intend to, just didn't plan on telling you my life story," He teased. 

"Sorry, I like to get to know my potential partners before I work with them," You teased back. 

"Potential? I still have that bottle of yours," his voice had become more gruff, his fingers cupping the lower half of your face, forcing you to look at him. 

There was that smirk. 

"And I still know how to poison people and make it look like an accident," you responded, grinding your hips down onto his. You grinned at the sight of him wincing as he felt your core brush against his emerging erection. 

"Does that make you hard Peter? That I know how to kill someone?" 

"What makes me hard is you're smart as hell, extremely stubborn, and look like an angel," He hissed as you rocked your hips forward again. 

"Show me. Show me how much you like that." You wanted control, wanted to know this was real and not some stupid ploy to make you weak. 

Because despite everything he had done, part of you still didn't trust it, didn't believe it. 

Thanks Dad. 

Peter's lips were all over your body, his hands pinning your waist to his bed. You were still processing the fact he was able to pick you up and carry you with great ease, like you weighed nothing. 

He was hiding something. 

But it was hard to sleuth when his lips were pressed against the thin, flimsy fabric that barely covered your core. 

"You know, if you move the fabric to the side, you could actually lick my cunt," you huffed. 

A gasp fell from your lips as you felt him slap your thigh, the sting making you throb in pleasure rather than pain. 

"That smartass mouth of yours doesn't stop, does it?" He asked before sinking his teeth into the soft flesh. 

"If you lied down, I can show you what else this smartass mouth can do." He groaned at your words and you noticed his hips grinding down into the mattress..

"Don't you know it's bad practice to switch up demands on someone?" He said, moving his body up as his hands reached for the straps holding your garment up. 

"Isn't that what you're here for? To teach me?" Peter pulled the straps down, tugging the slip off your body as he grinned at your words. 

"I'm here for a lot of things, Scheifele. Like to show you how good I can make you feel." God you hated that nickname and how it made you flustered. 

"You're doing an awful lot of talking, not so much showing," you tssked. 

"My apologies. Let me make it up to you." 

His mouth was hot on your cunt, his tongue wasting no time to find your clit. 

He wasn't your first, far from it. But you couldn't remember the last time you got to lie down and just feel. Feel pleasure, feel wanted, feel needed. 

"Taste fucking amazing," you heard Peter groan, "you're so good." 

You whined at the praise, your hands clawing at the tops of his shoulders. His tongue continued to circle around your bundle of nerves, his fingers running along your entrance to gather slick. 

The coil in your lower stomach was building. Your hips thrusted upwards in a desperate attempt to meet his mouth. 

His name fell from your lips, like a prayer. Not that there was anything holy about what his mouth was doing to you. 

He just felt so good. 

Which is why you whined when he broke away. Your cunt clenched around nothing, instantly missing the feel of his large fingers curling up against your walls. 

"I know, you were close," He cooed in your ear, "But I want the first time I make you

come to be on my cock." 

"Isn't that something you should decided with your partner beforehand?" You gritted through your teeth. 

Peter chuckled as his teeth grazed your chest, "Sorry, it's been a while since I had one." 

His admission surprised you. Granted, you could recall how he never seemed to have any other women around the house (who didn't work for him) or at parties. 

"So I have to teach you shit too? Doesn't sound like a fair partnership," you crossed your arms over your chest. 

"So sorry Scheifale. Let me make it up to you," He whispered into your ear as he pressed his cock into your entrance. 

A curse fell from your lips as he bottomed out, your walls stretching to accommodate him. 

Fuck, he felt amazing. 

Your back arched as he began thrusting in and out of you, building up a steady pace. 

In the back of your mind, you couldn't help but think about where you would be right now if things hadn't changed. Either alone in your old, dingy apartment or getting yelled at by your father. 

Thank God for arsenic.

#my writing #lizzy's fic prompts #lizzy's 900 #Peter Parker AU #mob!peter parker #peter parker x reader #peter parker x you #tasm peter x you #tasm peter x reader #tasm!peter x you #tasm!peter imagine #tasm!spiderman x reader #spiderman x you #Spiderman AU #tasm!peter x reader #tasm!peter parker x reader

[thecaptainoutoftime]

"OK, Vampire Anatomy 101, crosses and holy water don't do dick so forget what you've seen in the movies. You use a wooden stake, silver or sunlight to kill them. You know how to use one of these?"

*hands her a gun*

"No, but I'll damn sure learn quick. "

"Safety's off, round's already chambered. Silver hollow-point bullets filled with garlic. You aim for the head or the heart. Anything else, its your ass."

Happy 25th Anniversary to Blade

August 21st 1998-August 21st 2023

#Blade #Blade 1998 #Blade Movie #Wesley Snipes #Stephen Dorff #Kris Kristofferson #N'bushe Wright #Donal Logue #Deacon Frost #Abraham Whistler #Eric Brooks #Marvel

[gummy-axolotl]

how to make an asexual love you 101

give them garlic bread

they will now die for you

Yeah

#gummyanswers

[swabian-princess]

Domestic engineer tales - cooking 101

Hey girlies, todays topic is cooking. I know many girls that are scared to start their cooking journey and I know girls that simply don't want to cook.

Well, I believe that being able to cook and to alter recipes to your liking are so so important! It saves money in the long run, is healthier than take out and men are impressed!

I remember one instance: my bf and I were together for around 1,5 years at that time and I surprised him with a simple meal - chickenbreast with mushroom-cream-sauce on Tagliatelle. Everything but the Tagliatelle was made from scratch. He was so impressed - he literally told me a few months later, that he fell even more in love with me on that day.

I had professional cooking lessons for the majority of my schooltime and I like to believe that I'm a good cook! That's why I thought it would be nice to have some tips and tricks for you all!

1. If you want a meal to taste more like garlic do this: don't add the garlic in the beginning, instead just right before your meal is finished cooking. That adds way more garlic flavour!

2. Never overstir your pancake or cookie dough batter! It makes the finished products dense and a little bit stale - everything we don't like! Stir your batter just long enough, you shouldn't be able to see big patches of flour (a little is fine) and that's usually the perfect mixture!

3. Always let your dough rest! Especially yeast dough but also pasta and dumpling dough. This makes the dough more tender and easier to work with. If your recipe states a specific rest time - always follow the instructions!

4. If you want to make hot lemon water for health benefits make sure that your water is not boiling. If it's to hot for too long it will destroy all the nutrients and vitamins in the lemon!

5. If you're working with yeast - make sure that your liquids aren't too hot! This will kill the yeast (doesn't matter if instant or not) and your dough won't rise!

6. Don't use normal olive oil for cooking. Olive oil easily burns at a still low temperature and this can lead to a bitter taste. It's better for cold salad dressings or as a seasoning!

7. Your stove has different settings on purpose! You don't need to blast the highest setting all the time - this often leads to food that's burned on the outside and raw in the middle. I'm gonna take pancakes as an example: put your stove on middle heat, put a little bit oil in your non stick pan and wait 3-5min for your pan to heat up. Once your pan is hot enough (test it with your hands above the pan), take some kitchen towels and take off all the excess oil in the pan. Lastly, pour in your pancake batter and watch how your pancakes will cook to perfection instead of being burned and still full of liquid on the inside!

Lots of love

Selene

#hypergamy #hypergamous woman #baby heaux #heaux #heaux tips #high maintenance #hypergamous mindset #leveled up mindset #high maintenance heaux #leveling up journey #leveling up tips #leveling up #level up journey #leveled up woman #high class #highsociety #hyper feminine #hypergamyblr #hyperfemininity #spoiled heaux #spoiled girlfriend #spoiled gf #soft luxury #luxurious

[bratshaws]

through the hourglass 119. brb x oc

a/n: rooster is the best husband. reblogs and comments are much appreciated <3 thank you,THANK YOU for liking my fic

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: none.

goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)

chapter

1/

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/89/90/91/92/93/94/95/96/97/98/99/100/101/102/103/104/105

/106/107/108/109/110/111/112/113/114/115/116/117/118

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist! )

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@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2

@emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads @bigpoppajes @taytaylala12

@caitsymichelle13 @becks-things @caatheeriinee07 @dhwanishah09 @jesfreedark @katiemcrae @lilmonstrjedi @hobiismyhopeu @teacupsandtopgun @insominac23 @gh0stsgoodgirl @mygyn @chavivaelisheva

-

He watched her from the doorway, gray sweatpants on, a white tee stretched on his shoulders and a pleased little smile on his face as Beatrice busied herself by heating up their dinner. He allowed his eyes to drop towards the fullness of her ass and the way those pants hugged the curve beautifully.

He tilted his head to the side, furrowing his brows, was her ass a bit bigger? Not that he’d complain if it was because he loved her butt, but he couldn’t help but look at it for a while longer. She did become curvier after having Nikki,which he also couldn’t complain about, she looked like those Roman goddesses of old with that banging body of hers.

But he just looked for a little while, then tilted his head the other way, smirking when he could see the line of her thong underneath the fabric, “Is that red?”

“Huh?”

He nods towards her behind,”Is it red?”

Beatrice furrowed her brows in confusion, then looked down at herself thinking there was some stain or maybe she got her period and wasn’t prepared for it, until she saw the sliver of red peeking from under her pants and laughed, “Oh, well, yeah,yeah it is.” she giggles, pulling her pants a little bit higher, “It’s very comfortable.’

“It looks comfortable.” he adds, stepping closer to her so he could hug her from behind, kissing underneath her ear and smiling when she leaned against him, “And it looks great to take it off too.”

“Roos…”

“Not my fault my wife is hot.” he replies,kissing her jawline with his arms holding her tighter against his chest, “What are you heating up?”

“Some of the leftovers from last night: chicken alfredo and some garlic cheese bread my mom brought over. It’s fresh and I’m just heating it up for the crunch.” she explains, letting his lips touch her skin and grin when she felt the mustache tickle her neck,”You are very touchy tonight.”

“Am I?”

“Yes, you are.” she turns her head towards him,”Not that I’m complaining,I love when you get touchy.”

“I know you do.” he nuzzles her neck, inhaling the lavender scent and smirking when she giggled over his touch, “I love getting touchy with you…and I don’t think I have a reason tonight,maybe I’m just happy with how everything is going.” he begins, watching her stir the fettuccine in the pot and hearing Nicole babble from her bouncer not too far from them,” I have a really good life,baby. And I’m happy…I’m happy with you,with Nikki,with the dogs.” his hands slid down to her stomach, “And for whatever kids come after our baby girl,I swear.”

Beatrice had to clench the spoon when he mentioned that, immediately panicking thinking he saw the tests.

But he didn’t say anything,he just nuzzled even closer to her, humming deep in his chest and inhaling her scent once more, “I’m so happy to hear that Roos.” his thumb rubbed circles on her stomach and she tried to relax a bit more, he didn’t know why she was nervous so there was no reason to give that worry any more thought.

He stood there, behind her, hugging her close and smiling with his eyes closed as she moved around the stove and she bit her lower lip, his hands were almost protecting her stomach.  He didn’t know…but maybe he should.

She shouldn’t hide things from Rooster, that’s not how they relationship was.

But she was nervous and scared…so maybe, later, later they could talk about it.

“Baby.” his deep voice murmurs on her neck, face slowly lifting to press kisses to her cheek,”You look worried.”

“I don’t want to burn this.” she lies quickly, turning off the stove once she sees it bubbling and blinking down at the pot,”Yeah,I don’t want to burn this.”

Rooster hummed against her neck, his hands only moving now that she turned the stove off and there was no heat directed to her middle. Beatrice smiles as she feels them dragging away from her body, giggling at the love tap he gives each buttcheek before he steps back and kisses her nape,”I’m going to put Nikki up.” he says, bare feet touching the tiled floor as he approaches their daughter.

Beatrice looks over with her eyes soft, seeing how he gently picked their little girl up - always lifting her higher than his own height, just to make her giggle and make her feel like she’s flying- then bringing her down to kiss those chubby cheeks and earn the cutest,most lovely giggle a baby could give.

He was a good father.

A wonderful husband.

She was just scared….for some reason. Mainly the guilt, mainly the guilt of being pregnant so soon. Wanting or not, it was her responsibility, she told him it was okay, there was no need to worry about condoms or anything of the sort, she was taking care of herself.

She looks down at her navel, trying to once again see if there was any difference and of course there wasn’t, she still had her rolls and nothing else. Her pants were still comfortable and not tight at all. She sighed, rubbing her face with both hands before checking on the rest of her dinner.

She was so focused on herself she hadn’t seen Rooster watching, which he always did, he loved to watch her. His brown eyes following the way her green ones seemed to wander off to the side - a telltale sign of her own overthinking - and her eyebrows were low and the frown she wasn’t aware of was more prominent.

He wasn’t sure what was going on in her mind, he thought that it was a good day - after all she spent more of it out and about with Nicole and Shells. But he knew Beatrice way too well by now - four years together does that - and he knew when she was thinking too much, possibly blaming herself for something she had no control over.

“Baby,I can set everything up for dinner.” he says after Nicole is on her seat, babbling and slapping her little hands on the tray repeatedly,”You can stay with Nikki.”

“Oh,but I can-” he cuts her off by kissing her lips, her body relaxing and eyes fluttering because he had that power over her, when he pulls back with the softest smacking sound Beatrice only stared up at him with her pupils wide, “...okay…”

He smirks, stepping aside to let her pass - not before slapping her ass on the way - so he could take over for her. He still watched her before she sat down next to Nicole, their baby girl squealing happily once she noticed her mother was there now. “So.” he begins, opening the stove to check on their chicken and garlic bread, “How was your day? With Shells?”

He hears the ‘pop!’ of the baby food opening and Beatrice’s reply soon after, “Oh it was fine, we uh, had to buy some stuff for her. She always forgets to buy the simplest stuff.”

‘Yeah,I know,gorgeous…anything else happened?”

“Um…” he smiles when he hears Nicole’s ‘om nom nom’ - she genuinely makes that sound and he didn’t know how to react sometimes, their daughter was too precious - “No? I mean,we had ice cream and Nicole tried to get a bite but she can’t have milk until she’s older,I’m sorry Nikki.”

“Baah!”

“I know, it’s unfair.”

Rooster places the steaming chicken in the middle of their table with the garlic bread right next to it, licking his finger when some of the sauce clings on it, “Anything else?”

Beatrice flicks her gaze towards him - he could see the layer of nervousness already taking over, something did happen but she wasn’t ready to share with him yet- “No…not really. We just…had fun together, oh! Well,there was an accident with a Lamborghini when we left the grocery store and the guy was pissed and the cops were called. I think it even showed on TV, Shells saw the cameras,I didn’t.”

“Hmhm.”

“What?”

He purses his lips, leaning down to kiss her temple,”When you feel ready,” he begins,”To share with me what’s bothering you, you know you can.”

And she looked so guilty that he almost retracted his statement. Her eyes were wide and her lips parted, she was holding the spoon - now empty - close to Nicole’s mouth but her daughter’s little burbling and laughing only made her notice there was nothing there…at all, “...I…”

“Baby,” he says, warmly and so kind, “Baby, when you are ready. Don’t force it out yet, okay?”

“...okay,Roos.”

“Good,I love you pretty girl.” 

“I love you too.” 

He kissed her forehead before placing everything on the table, sitting down next to Beatrice and holding her hand once he was close enough.

-

She managed to grab her bag late that night - it took some squeezing and moving her hand under the couch,even some help from Jolene.- But she got it. She was in the dark,using only her phone as a source of light because Rooster was upstairs, in their bedroom and Beatrice used the excuse of needing a glass of water to get out of bed.

He was already half asleep and she thought…even if he said she could, she was still nervous. But she trusted him, but she also was nervous…but she loved him…

But she was nervous.

“This is so stupid.” she muttered, standing from her kneeling position with her bag held tightly against her chest, “This is so dumb, oh my God,I should just tell him.” she hoped her whispers weren’t that loud as she made her way up the stairs, saying goodbye to Jolene when she settled on the couch.

The light in their bedroom was still on, he kept it that way so she wouldn’t fumble around in the dark - god he was so sweet. She peeked inside for a second, blinking when she saw his bare back looking at her, rising and falling with the gentlest of snores breaking the silence in their bedroom, “...okay.” she carefully walked inside, setting the bag in the chair and carefully opening it.

She bites her lower lip, keeping an eye on him at every little noise she makes, managing to grab the three pregnancy tests with her teeth clenched. The boxes rubbed against one another and it was…unbelievably loud, but her husband didn’t wake up.

“If he does he’ll understand.” she whispers to herself, her eyes kept looking back at him to make sure he was still asleep.

Beatrice chews her lower lip, carefully patting over to the bathroom and shutting the door quietly behind her. She splayed the pregnancy tests in front of her and chewed the side of her thumb repeatedly, looking down at the three boxes as if it was the end of the world.

Do it,bambina, you know he won’t be mad.He loves you.

“And I love him.” she replies to her own thoughts, still looking down at the tests, turning one of the boxes back and forth before sighing heavily. She paces a bit in the bathroom, holding her temples, her night shirt smelling like him and normally it’d make her calm down but she couldn’t.

“Okay,” she stops,closing her eyes and tenting her hands, “Let’s…explain why I’m so nervous about this.” she inhales, pressing her fingers against her lips, “Why am i so scared? Let’s find reasons for it, because there is a reason, there’s always a reason.” Beatrice goes back to pacing, eyes still closed as she tries to find the words.

“First of: Nicole is young. She’s six months old, we planned more kids but only when Nikki was older.” she mutters, furrowing her brows, “Secondly: I was responsible for keeping up with my birth control, not Rooster. The reason I might be pregnant again has to be because I messed up and since I know myself,I’m already blaming every single second out of it.” she sighs again, rubbing her face, “Third: his job, he’s already stressed enough with Nicole, having more kids now it’s only going to make him more worried and so that can make him lose focus- okay that’s a lie, he’d never lose focus because of that…”

Beatrice frowned, “I think the first two make more sense.” she murmured, sighing heavily and leaning against the wall,sliding to the floor and thunking her head against the wall, interlacing her fingers between her thighs. She could see one of the boxes peeking over the edge of the sink, she knew she had to do it…but she was also scared, extremely so.

She was already blaming herself, she already had her own doubts…and yet she knew she had to do this.

“I’m going to.” she couldn’t wait for the holidays any longer too, she had to do this now and get this over with. She had her eyes closed, too lost in her own thoughts to hear the sounds from the outside.

She didn’t hear Rooster’s sleepy tone calling her name, nor heard his footsteps approaching the door, nor the knocking. Her husband stood outside, still blinking hard because of sleep and confused as to why she wasn’t answering, knocking one more time before asking if he could get inside.

Again, no answer.

And when there was no answer, Rooster’s mind went to the worst scenarios.

Again he says her name, this time turning the knob and wincing over the fluorescent lights above his head, “Jesus-Baby?”

“R-Rooster!”

He finally sees her, on the floor, quickly trying to pull herself upwards and almost lunging at the sink, in fact she did lunge at the sink, covering part of it with her upper body. He just blinked, still trying to understand what was going on, then rubbed his eyes with a tired grunt,’What’s happening?” he asks, trying to figure out why his wife was almost climbing on the sink.

Beatrice’s voice is gone but she tries to speak only for her mouth to open and close.While trying to adjust herself on the sink, she hears it.

A paper thud hitting the floor.

And both pairs of eyes slowly turn to the sound. The very large, very pink ‘PREGNANCY TEST’ looks back at them. She clenches her eyelids, only to open her eyes when she hears nothing but Rooster’s breathing, he’s still looking at the box, clearly confused, a mix of sleep and bewilderment in his face. ‘R-Roos.” she doesn’t stop him when he leans down to pick it up, holding it in his hands.

He turns the box once, then twice, then three times. Then rubs his eyes, blinks, and leans his head closer, “...is this…a pregnancy test or am I dreaming?”

“I…” she licks her lips, laughing nervously, “It’s… actually three.” she leans back from the sink to expose the other two boxes.

She clenches her hands tight enough for the knuckles to turn white, waiting for his reaction. Something, anything.

Rooster is still staring at the boxes, his eyes slowly focusing on her and she could see those brown irises becoming more alert, “...why do you have three pregnancy tests?” he was still sleepy, she knew that, because his voice was still slurred.

“I…” she rubs her hands, “I…didn’t get my period…and…and I’m feeling kinda sick…so…I-I think,I thought it’d be good to test it.”

“But…aren’t you on birth control shots?”

She tried not to wince, he wasn’t being accusatory, he was just curious when he asked her that, “...Yes,I mean,I…I am but,it could fail…I think.”

And silence fills the bathroom again. She’s not looking at him, too embarrassed and scared to, so she had to speak to cover up the sudden shame that was covering her right now, “I know it’s crazy,I know it is Roos. But it’s just to be sure. T-That’s all,I don’t really think I am but y-you know–”

“Baby.” he stops her rambling when he touches her shoulder, setting the box aside. She slowly looks up at him, seeing those whisky colored eyes looking down at her with the gentlest smile on his face, “Baby,it’s okay.”

“It is?”

‘I mean, it’s not what I expected to wake up to.” he laughs, “But it’s better than thinking you were sick or hurt.”

Her cheeks flushed when he said that and she leaned on his touch as soon as his hand cupped her cheek, rubbing under her eyelid with such a gentle brush she almost didn’t feel it, “I guess so…I…how do you– are you okay with this?”

He flicks his gaze to the tests, then back at her, “...honestly,I’m still thinking I’m dreaming.” he laughs again, “But…if you are wondering if I’m okay with more kids…you know I am.”

“But…it’s so soon Roos,if I am–”

“Let’s test it first.” he cuts her off gently, “I don’t want you overthinking before it happens,gorgeous. Please…let’s test it, I’ll be more awake then hopefully. I might get some coffee downstairs.”

“You can go back to sleep.”

He snorts in disbelief, “I’m not leaving you here alone.” he says, “You look terrified and I don’t plan on going back to bed like that. Especially without you.” he kisses her forehead, “Let’s do one thing then, let’s go back downstairs: I get some coffee and you get some water just to keep the sleep away.” he hugs her to his side, kissing her scalp, “What do you think?”

“I think I’m an idiot.”

“You aren’t.”

“I still think I’m an idiot.” she murmured, “I…you are having the reaction I thought you would and yet I was scared.”

Bradley huffs a laugh against her head, kissing her scalp one more time, “Ah,gorgeous.” He gently guides her out of the bathroom, letting her hug his bare torso, “You are so cute, and not an idiot.” her little ‘hrm’ was his only answer, “How about I make you a nice cappuccino? Or hot cocoa? Do you want some?”

“...yeah…that’d be nice.”

“Let’s make that two, then,I can add some coffee on mine, it’s going to be good.” he smiles, taking her towards the staircase. Honestly he was still…digesting what Beatrice said. He still thinks he’s partially dreaming, because it was such a wild concept - another baby! So soon! - that his brain was taking longer to identify information so late at night. He kissed Beatrice’s head, however, as soon as they reached the bottom floor, smiling when he just hugged him tighter. 

Dreaming or not…it’d be nice either way.

#bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x oc #top gun maverick #bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw x female reader #bradley bradshaw x named reader #tgm oc #tgm fic #tgm fanfiction

[aroaceofthesea]

Tips to, you know, not die in your sleep when being attacked by a vampire:

Use a garlic flower wreath to keep the vampire away

Idk maybe NOT COMPARE YOURSELF TO OPHELIA who died with a lot of flowers over her

Maybe (just maybe) don't ignore the flapping just outside the window like what the One Person Who Seems To Know What Is Going On has mentioned specifically

Don't sign off with a fckin 'Goodnight everyone' in your diary this is literally How To Die Tonight 101 even if you're not being attacked by a vampire

(please don't take out your flower wreath while sleepwalking tonight lucy)

#dracula daily #lucy westenra #lucy is gonna die tonight😭😭 #why why why lucy #do we all agree that if she survives tonight she's exceeded all expectations and nothing should happen to her ever again? #i actually have no idea what happens in the book people #i havent even watched the movies #so this isnt a spoiler its just a guess #no spoilers #and no spoilers in the notes either pls #mine

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

Part 5

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Part 4 🟣 Part 6 

A reverse harem vampire AU ft. Mikey, Marshall, August and Sherlock

Series summary: Somehow, you've managed to live with your boyfriend and his roommates for months before finding out they're vampires, but the real shock first comes when they find out you have a special quality. A quality the guys would love to make use of...

Warnings: Mentions of blood, biting, vampire stuff.

Word count: 3.5k

A/N: Buttload of information incoming!

@geralts-yenn @deandoesthingstome @summersong69

Elective courses on vampirism. Mind reading gifts. Vampires appearing out of nowhere. The strange urge to offer yourself up as dinner you hadn't been able to stop. The term 'blood whore' wouldn't leave your thoughts. Part of you wished Marshall had never shared that with you. And the suggestion that you play walking buffet for four vampires... Now there was something that definitely rubbed you the wrong way.

Thirty minutes went by quickly as you thought about everything that had happened, and not even a second after you caught yourself violently curious and longing for information, there was a knock on the door.

"Mikey told me to tell you that you don't have to scream," Sherlock said as he stepped into your room. "How are you feeling?" The question sounded less feverish than half an hour ago in the living room; he'd obviously calmed down again.

"I'm good. How is everyone else?"

"Gone," he said, "I told them to hit the road."

"Thank you." The last thing you needed right now was Marshall and Mike digging around in your brain. "Where do we start?"

"Curious, huh?" Sherlock asked. "That's good. I say we go through the topics, and you point out the need-to-knows?” Actually, that didn't sound like a bad idea.

"I still can't believe I am taking vampire lessons out of necessity all of a sudden."

"I'm sure you can adjust," Sherlock said, "your curiosity is a perfect indicator for it."

"I mean..." You could tell you were beginning to blush. "It's definitely interesting."

"Certainly," he said. "Now, first of all; thank you. I don't think I've said that."

"You're welcome." You were surprised by how much you genuinely meant that. "How come you were in such rough shape?"

"I was away for research over the summer, there hadn't been an opportunity to feed for weeks. I used my last bit of strength to get home."

"What were you researching?"

"Oh, I'll need to talk you through four more courses to make it understandable." His tone was friendly, and it made you like him even more. He wasn’t a condescending dick, like August.

"Maybe later," you laughed.

"What do you know?"

"Mike and the others brought me up to speed on the garlic, how turning someone works, a little bit about the gifts. And your... Food sources."

"Alright, so the basics. And our version of 'the talk'." Yes, you confirmed, that was pretty much it. "Perhaps a basic rundown of what you are wouldn't be out of place."

"I was hoping that would be one of the topics, yes." You just hadn't been entirely sure that it was 101 enough.

"You have a right to know, but it might be a bit complicated. Some things I may not be able to explain today, I hope you can accept that without thinking of me as a condescending arse?"

"I'm familiar with August, so I'm no stranger to a little derision." Sherlock laughed at your remark.

"That's a fair point."

"Anyway, Marshall called me a 'natural', was it?" If you were this curious about your classes, you’d be a straight A student, you were sure of it. Unfortunately for you and your grades, vampires were a tad more interesting. Especially since you were apparently wired to be food for them.

"Yes."

"Because being a vampire snack comes natural to me? Or 'us', I guess?" You definitely sounded more casual than you felt about the whole situation. There was definitely a lot to talk about, a lot to unpack, and a part of you really just wanted to hide from it all.

"Yes and no. Let me..." He took a tablet from the bag you had never seen him put down in the first place, and pulled up actual lecture slides. "I am going to try to make this an A to B kind of story. I am also going to warn you I'm not very good at those. I probably won't have to tell you vampires aren't the monsters humans once believed us to be."

"Mike took care of that... It took a me a minute to get on board with that." There was no point in lying to him, especially since your education had seemed to be a massive redeeming factor up until now.

"You were raised by the opposition, then?" Sherlock chuckled softly.

"Very much so, homeschooled and everything." Sherlock raised his eyebrows upon hearing your answer, and commented on the fact that Mike had done a very good job at changing your beliefs about vampires.

"There's still a lot to unpack,” you said softly while looking at your hands. It was all strange and new, and you were long past the option of walking away and pretending none of this had ever happened.

"Indubitably." There was something heartwarming about Sherlock’s smile you couldn’t quite put your finger on. He was a handsome man, slightly older than the others, though not by much, with a certain serenity to him that came with years – possibly centuries – of experience. How anyone was able to concentrate with him as a professor, however, you couldn’t figure out.

Somewhere along the way, your subconscious decided it was time to start asking questions, and pushed one to the front of your mind: "How did I become the way I am?" Sherlock patiently explained that you were born that way: It was an unusual, though not rare, mutation.

"What does it do?"

"If you'll allow me more than a single sentence in between interruptions, I'll tell you." Another charming smile gave you the weird urge to giggle – but you suppressed it.

"Sorry, professor,” you said jokingly, and he answered with a chuckle.

"As I was trying to say; humans and vampires have been coexisting peacefully for several centuries. Mike wouldn't even know of a time where they didn't, the rest of us have memories aplenty, and some scars for good measure.

"We made it this far, because we gradually developed a symbiotic relationship with your kind. Now, normally, these types of evolution take far longer than just a few short centuries, and to this day we don't know just what accelerated this change. It's especially curious because your kind is, as I pointed out earlier, quite unusual.

"Now, most humans who voluntarily allowed us to feed ourselves found it exhilarating, a thrill. Which was understandable because there was a significant risk of dying. There still is."

"Excuse me? Mike assured me that the only way to die would be if he… chose to…" Had he been lying to you when he said that dying wasn’t something you needed to worry about in your little experiment? You immediately felt embarrassed for asking. The details of your sex life were none of Sherlock’s business, after all, and you’d rather avoid this topic of conversation altogether – but it was too late for that, now.

"Ah, right. Bear with me for a moment, please? That relationship between vampires and naturals I described, tackles precisely that problem, and the one of the significant pain a normal human donor usually feels."

"Pain? There's no..."

"Not for you, not beyond the pain of the bite itself. For a normal human, even weakened venom would be painful. To willingly go through that would be indicative of serious masochistic tendencies." Sherlock also explained that this was precisely the reason that ‘unmedicated administration of bites’ – as he called it – was something usually reserved for erotic purposes. You appreciated the clinical, professional approach he took to explaining what was – in essence – more kinky vampire shit.   

"So when I offered without thought, you knew?"

"I suspected, and I do have to admit I was prepared to confirm my theory. Then I saw Mike's face. Marshall's commentary confirmed my suspicions. I'm fairly sure he got confirmation from Mikey's thoughts directly."

"And how does my… Condition… Tackle the problem of being drained?" Was ‘condition’ the right word? Existence? Nature?

"A fair question that's kept us occupied for quite some time. It wasn't a secret for long that some humans not only felt no pain when fed on, but also didn't seem to run out of blood. You can imagine what a commodity you were. Large sums of money were involved in the trade of your kind. You were stolen, wars were fought over you. Not to mention the crusades against you as much as us, because humans believed your kind's specific purpose was to feed vampires, and they believed that voluntary feeding was of the devil. They tried everything in their power to keep our feeding practices a crime."

"I'm afraid my family is still in that camp…" You shuddered at the thought of your parents finding out about your current living arrangements, let alone them finding out you were anything other than the perfect little girl they thought they had raised.

"Then I can't tell you how glad I am they never found out about your nature." Sherlock had an apologetic look on his face when he said it, and you decided not to push the matter, but it did make you feel uneasy. Luckily, it wasn’t hard to move on from the subject when the next question popped up in your mind.

"What causes it?"

"Right, the actual answer to your question. Your blood contains a chemical that, when it comes into contact with our venom, creates two other chemicals; one of which accelerates the speed with which your blood regenerates to the point where a vampire can't feed faster than you… replenish. Experiments have been conducted with two of us feeding simultaneously, and results showed it was not only dependent on the amount of venom in your system, but also a matter of habituation."

"Like… Breastfeeding?"

"An interesting choice to describe a basic supply and demand economy, but yes, and also very much no. Do you mind if we skip the technicalities for now?" He emphasized the fact that this would become a very lengthy conversation very rapidly if he were to explain everything in detail, though he didn’t want to put you off asking for further explanations, if that was what you really wanted. For now, however, you were good with the basics.

"If you bite me, I make blood faster, got it." The questions just kept coming, and you were really glad to not have asked for more details, because you were sure your head would overflow with information by the end of this talk, anyway. “What did Mike mean when he said he’d have to… drain me on purpose? mean, he didn’t know what I was at that point. Did he lie to me?”

“Ah, right. He didn’t lie. You see, he wasn’t feeding at the time. There would have been no reason for him to drink a large quantity of blood. Does that answer your question?" You nodded in reply to his asking. “Perfect. Moving on to the other chemical. That’s what is responsible for the… It’s been described as a ‘warm, fuzzy feeling’ you experienced during the… exchange. That one has an effect on us, too, if we take it in. It causes the overwhelming urge to take care of and protect you.”

“That’s what that was?”

Sherlock smiles apologetically. “Yes, it was. I’m sorry for not explaining it then and there, but it’s a very strong sense of protectiveness, and it had been a while since I’d fed in general, let alone from a natural. I was a bit preoccupied.”

“It’s okay,” you said, and you meant it.

“That chemical is also what made you so inclined to offer to let me feed. It was a rather strong urge, wasn’t it?” Indeed, it had been. So strong, even, that you doubted whether or not you would have been able to ignore it.

“And those things don’t happen when feeding on a normal human?”

“Indeed it doesn’t. We’ve managed to synthesize the chemical that serves as a painkiller and makes regeneration faster, which is what we now use to allow for safe feeding. But we haven’t been able to recreate the other one. Again, I unfortunately can’t tell you why. Efforts have been made. I suppose it’s hardly necessary to recreate that one, in fact it would be counterproductive to elicit that effect on purpose. Oh well…”

“So, voluntary feeders aren’t in pain, and you don’t have to worry about them afterwards. That sounds like a better deal than feeding on a natural.”

“It isn’t. It’s always better than feeding on an unwilling donor, or someone in pain – who isn’t enjoying that pain. But your kind have…”

“The a5 Wagyu of blood?” You couldn’t quite figure out whether or not that sounded like a brag, but it was out now, time to just roll with it.

“Exactly.”

"And feeding on another vampire? How does that compare? How is it even possible?" You were starting to feel awkward about your relentless curiosity, but Sherlock assured you that it was no problem whatsoever.

"Ah. We'll keep it simple. You know vampires drink blood."

"Obviously, I was lunch not even an hour ago." As if you could ever forget the most basic bit of vampire knowledge out there.

“Right. Logically, vampires can feed on anything that has blood.” “So vampires have blood?”

“Correct. Our metabolism works differently; it processes blood we drink and turns it into our own, which then functions as the fuel for our bodies. It’s as fulfilling as human blood, but the only way for us to come by more of it is to feed. We don’t make more blood. We also don’t taste as good. Alright, we taste very bad.” Sherlock laughed, and it sounded almost sarcastic.

“And human food?”

“That tastes absolutely fine, but metabolizing costs far more energy, because our system isn’t wired for it. It takes about five times as much food to sustain us than it does you.”

It looked like it was finally time to ask the question you’d been avoiding: “When Mike said you all hoped…”

“Ah,” Sherlock wasn’t surprised you asked the question. “When you said ‘McBloodDrive’, that wasn’t far off – conceptually. But it lacked a lot of depth and feeling. I understand your resistance to the idea, but would you allow me to explain?”

“Isn’t that why we’re here?” You tried to conjure up a smile – and failed miserably.  

“Good point. Where to begin… First of all; it’s like you said. You have the blood-equivalent of A5 Wagyu running through your veins. Can we at least agree it’s understandable they want a taste of that?” Alright, you couldn’t deny that without lying… “So part of it is a bit of jealousy towards Mike.”

“Mikey doesn’t… He hasn’t…” You felt a blush creep onto your cheeks again at Sherlock’s suggestion.

“He would have asked sooner or later,” Sherlock said, sounding fairly sure of himself, “knowing Mike, it would have been sooner rather than later.” Even you had to admit that that sounded entirely plausible.

“Besides, most humans get curious at some point. I mean. You did.” He made a vague gesture at your neck.

“Are you saying I would have asked him to feed on me at some point?”

“There’s a very strong possibility.” You had to admit you’d been curious, and as much as you hated to admit it now, there had been a part of you that had been wondering what it felt like if someone were to feed on you. Of course the events of this afternoon had satisfied that curiosity – but there was still definitely something inside you that wouldn’t mind doing it again.

Sherlock then went on to explain that these relationships were not just for the benefit of the vampires, but also for your kind. Adverse effects for you were minimal if not nonexistent – though in the olden days, a natural would have been expected to be available without question, at all times. You, however, still couldn’t fathom being anything other than…

“A McBloodDrive?” he asked with a sardonic chuckle. You shrugged. It was really the only thing you could come up with.

“You’re underestimating the nature of the relationship. They are really rather intimate – it’s inescapable. You wouldn’t simply be a food source. Dear Lord, how do I explain this… I can’t do this well, I’m sorry. I think I may need the others. Are you okay with that?” You nodded. Sherlock gave them a quick call, asking them to come back to the apartment before returning to your conversation.

“And… They were gunning for a steady thing, right?” The answer to your question was affirmative. From here on out, the questions that bubbled up in your mind were no longer coherent, the next no longer a continuation of the former – it was a mess, that was the only way you could describe it.

“Those… arrangements… are they common?”

“They are not. In fact, they’re quite rare. Many naturals capitalize on their assets, so to speak.”

“You can make money off it?”

“Oh yes. Quite a lot, too. Some of us pay good money for a steady arrangement with one of you.” He explained a type of relationship that was very reminiscent of a sort of sugar daddy type of setup – not something you were interested in at all. Others, he said, were just able to afford regular feedings from naturals, but the general setting for the establishments that offered those services was much more relaxed, more comfortable, and much more exclusive and therefore less crowded.  

“These arrangements… what are they like?” you asked when he explained all of this to you.

“What are you really asking me?” By now you had definitely learned that not much escaped this guy’s attention.

“Is it a sex thing?” You felt blood rush to your cheeks as you asked your question, but you had to know. And you didn’t find it weird, either.

“Is that what this afternoon felt like?” You quickly shook your head. That definitely hadn’t been sexual, although it was absolutely very intimate.

“The intimacy is a given in the kind of situation you would end up with us.” He said ‘us’, you noticed, so he wasn’t opposed to the idea, either. He did express that there was a possibility that such agreements occasionally did lead to deeper feelings of intimacy between participants. It led you to question whether one of you and four of them would be weird, to which Sherlock answered that the other way around would be much stranger.

“Have you ever been involved in such an arrangement?” you asked carefully. Your curiosity was really getting the better of you, and you didn’t know if you could contain it any longer. “You don’t have to answer! I don’t mean to pry. If it’s personal, by all means, don’t tell me.”

“It’s alright, darling, it is personal, but I am more than happy to share the story,” he said. It answered your question; it was obviously a ‘yes’. “It was just over five hundred years ago.” That shocked you, and you realized you had never asked the guys how old they were. Your surprise must have been apparent, because Sherlock answered the question you had never dared ask.

“I am just under nine hundred years old,” he said, “Marshall and August a little over four. Mike was born in the sixties.”

“He’s just a baby?” Somehow you found that incredibly endearing.

“Don’t say that to him. August would be quick to agree with you, though.” Sherlock let out another one of his dark chuckles. The sound of them was incredibly soothing.

“Where were you five hundred years ago?” you whispered. It seemed like such a strange thing to ask.

“English court,” he answered, “serving as a court physician under Henry XIII. The first Duke of Suffolk – Charles Brandon – was one of us, and he had… procured one of your kind – don’t ask me how, I have no idea and I doubt I want to know – to feed on. For services rendered he offered me… access, so to speak. It was a rather clean-cut business arrangement, as impersonal as could be. He refused to allow me to tend to her, afterwards, which made it hard on me, occasionally.”

“How so?” you asked, wondering out loud what would have happened if you had told him to back off.

“Nothing would have happened, per se, but it is a very strong, uncomfortable feeling of needing to do something, desperately wanting to take care of someone, and not being able to. It soured my mood rather thoroughly.” He chuckled softly again, but the sound had a melancholic ring to it, this time. The memories clearly struck a chord with him, still, and you weren’t surprised at all when he changed the subject.

“The others will be back soon,” he said hoarsely before clearing his throat, “I suggest you take another minute, because this wasn’t the last long talk of the day, I’m afraid.”

#mike hellraiser fic #mike x ofc #mike hellraiser #mike (hellraiser) #hellraiser mike #mike hellraiser fanfiction #henrycavill fanfic #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill #henry cavill characters #walter marshall #hc sherlock #henry cavill sherlock holmes #sherlock holmes #august walker #august walker fanfiction

[awesome-recipes101]

Ground Beef Egg Rolls

 5-6 servings

These are tasty and wonderfully crunchy egg rolls.

Ingredients

1 pound chuck ground beef

1 tablespoon Sesame oil

3 teaspoons garlic, minced

1 teaspoon ginger, minced

½ cup brown sugar

¼ cup soy sauce, lite

1 package (20 pieces) egg roll wrappers

1 package matchstick carrots

1 tablespoon butter

4 Napa Cabbage leaves, shredded or sliced

Canola oil for frying

Directions

In a large skillet cook and stir the ground beef, sesame oil, garlic and ginger over medium heat until the beef is well crumbled and is no longer pink.  Drain off the excess fat.

Add the brown sugar and soy sauce.  Continue cooking until the liquid has been reabsorbed.  Set aside to let it cool.

In a smaller frying pan add 1 tablespoon of butter.  When it has melted add half the bag of carrots. Fry for a few minutes to make them tender.  Set aside to let it cool.

Take the cabbage leaves and slice or shred them.

Take out the egg roll wrappers.  Place the first one on a diagonal.  Layer some cabbage, then put in a few carrots, then put in 2 tablespoons of beef.  Now proceed to wrap them in the egg roll wrapper.

First take the right point and fold it over the food.  Then take the top and bottom of the wrapper and fold it over.  Finally wet the left point and sides of the wrapper and fold it completely over the egg roll and secure. 

Freeze the egg rolls on a flat baking sheet for about 15 minutes.

Meanwhile pour about 2 inches of the oil into a deep pot or frying pan and let it reach a frying temperature.  Place some of the frozen egg rolls into the hot oil.  Cook for a few minutes and then flip over.  Repeat.  Let the cooked egg rolls drain on a cooking rack.  When finished cooking all egg rolls you can serve them with duck sauce or whatever sauce you prefer.

Notes

You can find egg roll wrappers in the produce section (usually in a refrigerated area). One package usually has about 20 wrappers.  They may be called egg rolls because eggs were used to close the wrappers.

Bags of matchstick carrots are available in the produce section as well as jars of minced garlic and ginger.  About one teaspoon is equal to 1 clove of garlic.

#food #egg rolls #ground beef #Carrots #Napa Cabbage #ginger #garlic #awesome recipes 101

[marvelwoman-sugarbaby]

Poor Baby Hope

CEO!Wandanat x Assistant!Mom!Fem!Reader

BestFriend!MariaHill x Reader

A/N: It’s finally posted!!! Yay 😁 Thank you to all of you for wait patiently. I’m sorry it has taken so long and I will try to write and post whenever I can 🫣

Something Amazing Masterlist

Words: 3233

Genre: Fluff and a little Hurt/Comfort

Warning: Sick People, Cuss Word?

Summary: After a month of dating, on your fifth date, including the family date, Hope gets sick and you decide to stay home with her. Natasha and Wanda understand and decide to make a surprise visit and help.

Y/N POV

When I got up and changed, I made my way to Hope’s room. When I got there, I got all her things together to make it easier to get ready for daycare. As I make my way over to Hope’s bed, I can tell some things off. Her face is scrunched up in discomfort and curled up in the fetal position. I put my hand on her forehead and realized she was burning up.

I took her blanket off and turned on the A.C. Next, I changed her into more breathable clothing, a tank top, and shorts. Then, I go to the kitchen to get the thermometer. When I get back to Hope and check her temperature, it’s 101. I place the water on her bedside table and go back to the kitchen.

I start to make soup for Hope, and as I’m preparing the ingredients, I get on the phone to call Hope’s daycare. I start by shaving the carrots' skin and setting the oven to 350. “Hello, this is ‘Happy Trails Daycare’, and you are speaking with Sophie. How may I help you?” I get out a knife and cutting board, placing the shaved carrots on the board, I start cutting them into bite-sized pieces. “Hi, this is Y/N Y/L/N. I’m calling about Hope Y/L/N. She’s come down with a fever, so she won’t be coming to daycare today.”

I move on to cutting the celery, onion, and garlic. “Oh really. The poor thing. Well, I hope she gets better soon. Goodbye.” “Goodbye.” When I hang up, the next person I call is Natasha and Wanda. As the phone is ringing, I prepare the chicken. “Detka, is everything okay?” I put the chicken in the oven and set a timer for 45 minutes, then continued cutting the garlic. “No, I’m sorry, Nat, I can’t come to work today. Is that okay?”

I bring out a pot, drizzle a little olive oil inside, and wait for it to heat up a little before putting in the carrots, celery, and onions inside as well. “Yeah, that’s fine. Can we ask why?” Wanda sounded a little worried. “It’s fine. It’s just that Hope is sick. Her temperature is at 101.” “Oh, is there anything we can do to help?”

My heart flutters at the fact that they sound genuinely worried about Hope. They even want to help. “As much as I’d love the help, both of you have work. So I will take care of Hope, and the two of you don’t have to worry about it.” The vegetables are now soft, so I add the garlic. “Are you sure you don’t want any help?” “No, I don’t need any help. I got it all taken care of. I’m going to hang up now, so both of you get back to work.” I say in my ‘mom voice’. I hear Wanda and Natasha let out a chuckle on the other side of the phone, bringing a small smile to my face.

When I hang up, I take the chicken out of the oven since the timer went off. I added the chicken broth as well as the spices to the pot. I put the fire on low, so it only keeps everything inside warm. Then, I shred the chicken and put it off to the side, covering the chicken and the soup with a lid.

I go upstairs to wake up Hope. When she wakes up, her eyes are watering, showing she’s close to crying. She instantly puts herself in my arms. Whenever she’s sick, she becomes clingy, so it doesn’t come as a surprise. I take her to the bath and start the water, making it warm but keeping it on the colder side. While I wait for the water to fill up, I get her another change of clothes. It’s a long flowing pink dress that’s soft to the touch.

I help her clean her soap up and even do her hair. When she’s out, I help her brush her teeth and hair. Then, I go back downstairs with Hope on my hip and her face tucked into my neck. I turn the fire for the pot up to medium and wait for it to come to a gentle boil. Once it comes to its boil, I add the egg noodles. I then go to the medicine cabinet to get Hope medicine, but the doorbell rings, and Hope lets out a whine since the doorbell is making her headache worse.

On my way to the door, they keep ringing the doorbell, and since it’s hurting Hope, I start to get mad. “I’m coming. Calm down.” When I get to the door, they ring again as I open the door, a bit agitated, I say. “I have a sick child, and your ringing the-” I pause when I see Natasha and Wanda, and my agitation subsides.

I was thoroughly confused since I could have sworn I told them they should stay at work. I raised an eyebrow and moved my arm that wasn’t holding Hope to rest on my hip. “Sorry, we didn’t know Hope’s head was hurting. If we did, we would’ve just knocked.” “I know, Wanda. I’m just trying to figure out what the two of you are doing here.” Hope took a little peek out of my neck to see Natasha and Wanda’s faces. They both gave her a little smile. “We asked if you wanted help.” Natasha shifted her attention from Hope to me. “And I told you I don’t need help.”

Wanda came closer and stroked Hope's head to give her some relief. It obviously was working since she was leaning into her hand. “Exactly, you said need. But we asked you if you wanted help.” Natasha said, putting emphasis on the words need and wanted.

I gave in and stepped to the side, letting them inside. We all went into the kitchen, where I tried to get back to cooking. Keyword tried, but Wanda was pretty adamant that she would do it while I held Hope. I’m not really used to all this help. I mean, I know I have Maria, but she’s too busy doing things to help most of the time. Leaving me to do everything by myself with Hope clinging to my side. So having someone try to lighten my load feels foreign, let alone two. Reluctantly I let Wanda finish making the soup.

I get out the medicine, and as soon as Hope sees it, she starts to whine. “No, mommy. I don’t want it.” She starts squirming, so I put her down and crouch to her level. “I know, it tastes nasty, but it will make you feel all better.” I get out a cup and apple juice from the fridge to fill the cup with. I turn around to face Hope. “How about right after you drink the yucky medicine, you can drink the juice. Then you won’t even know you drank the medicine.”

Hope asks to be picked up, so I place her on the counter. I give her the medicine and hold onto the juice waiting for her to take her medicine. When she drinks it, her face scrunches in disgust and immediately goes for the juice. She chugged it all down like she hadn’t had anything to drink in days. “I can still taste it, mommy, and it’s yucky.” I let out a little chuckle and picked up Hope with the cup in her hands. “How about you drink some water?” I take Hope’s cup from her and put it in the sink.

“But can I just have more juice?” I give her a laugh. “That’s cute but know I think you’ve had enough juice for a sick girl.” I kiss her on the forehead and make a cup of water, and she drinks most of it. “All better, little love?” She nods and hides her head in my neck again. Before the rest of her water can spill, I take it from her hands and place it on the counter.

“The soups done.” Wanda says in a quiet voice so as to not hurt Hope’s head any more than she already had. I look over at her, and she’s making two bowls. Natasha comes up to me and places her hand on my lower back. “Why don’t I feed Hope while you eat, detka.” I’m about to decline Wanda speaks up. “It wasn’t a request, moya lyubov’.” “But-” As soon as I let that out of my mouth, Wanda’s head tilts to the side, so I know I’m not winning this one.

“Little love.” She looks up at me, looking a little tired and weak, which breaks my heart a little. “Can Natasha feed you while mommy eats?” She just nods and reaches for Natasha. Natasha has a smile on her face that reaches her eyes when Hope reaches for her. I’ve only ever seen that smile when she’s with Wanda and, as of recently me. It truly warms my heart, and I feel my heart skip a beat.

Natasha takes Hope’s bowl from Wanda and goes to the table, where Natasha lets Hope sit on her lap. When I go to reach for my bowl, I remember that they need to eat as well. “What’s the matter, moya lyubov’?” “What are you and Natasha going to eat?” She gives me a smile and a kiss on the head. “We already ate before you called. It’s okay. You can eat.” Satisfied, I take the bowl and a seat next to Natasha. Wanda follows me and takes the other seat next to mine.

---------------

When Hope and I finish eating, I take our bowls to the sink while Natasha takes Hope to the living room. When I get to the living, the first thing I see is Hope cuddled into Natasha’s chest and Natasha stroking her head. Wanda comes up from behind and puts her arms around my waist and her head on my shoulder.

“She’s always loved children and wanted one. But we never could.” I turned my head to Wanda, looking toward Natasha and Hope with a sad expression, and her eyes were watering a little.

I turned in her hold and cupped her face having her face me. “What happened?” She had a fond smile on her face. “Natasha was told that she could never have a child. So we decided I would carry them.” A tear rolled down her face as I could feel my eyes start to water. “We had twins. Billy and Tommy.” Her fond smile turned into a sad frown. “But they had defects that could be helped, and eventually, they both succumbed to them.”

The tears were now coming out of Wanda’s eyes like a waterfall. I wiped away the ones I could, and eventually, she stopped. When she looked into my eyes, she looked so broken, and I didn’t know what to do. So I grabbed the back of her neck with both my hands and kissed her. Wanda brought me in closer by my waist. I felt her lips form a small smile. When I pulled away, she still looked sad, but she looked happier.

Wanda took one of my hands from behind her neck and brought the back of it up to her lips and gave it a peck. We went up to Hope and Natasha hand in hand. “Hey, Hope, how do you feel about watching a movie? Your choice, of course.” Hope took her face out of Natasha’s face and gave Wanda a nod and smile. Hope decided that she wanted to watch an ocean documentary because the animals are pretty. Her words, not mine.

That didn’t stay on too long because the animals were killing other animals, and Hope didn’t like that. So instead, we just watched Clifford (because Hope is an educated child and knows good cartoons.) Hope spent the rest of the day going between the three of us, and when it was nap time, she slept in Wanda’s arms.

---------------

At the end of the day, at Hope's bedtime, I started to lull her to sleep. I walked around with her head on my shoulder. I also rubbed her lower back to soothe her. Hope fell asleep after only a half-hour, it would have taken a shorter time, but since she was sick, it didn’t help.

After I tucked her into bed, I went to my room where Natasha and Wanda were. They are in some of my pajamas, sitting against the headboard with space between them. When I go onto the bed, I place my head on Natasha’s lap and my feet on Wanda’s.

Natasha stroked my head gently while smiling down at me. “Hi, detka.” I gave Natasha a hum of acknowledgment. Wanda started massaging my feet, and I let out a groan of relief. “Moya lyubov’?” “Yes.” I turn my face, so I can look at Wanda.

“Will you be our girlfriend?” I give them a smile that reaches my ears. “My goodness, Wanda. I knew you were brave, but I thought you’d have Natasha ask.” Wanda gave me a light slap on the leg, and we all laughed.

“So, is that a yes or a no.” I sit up, grab Natasha by the neck, and kiss her. When I pull back, her eyes are still closed. ”So is that a yes.” I laugh and hit Natasha’s shoulder, then I kiss Wanda.

“Yes, that’s a yes.”

When we go to sleep, Natasha is hugging me from behind, and I face Wanda’s direction and lay my head on her chest. In the morning, when we woke up, Hope was feeling like herself again.

But as happy as I am that Hope is all better, that didn’t last long.

Third Person POV

Hope had just gotten up and was feeling much better than she was the day before, so she ran to her mom's room. When she got inside, Y/N was in the middle of the bed with Wanda and Natasha on either side of her. Hope jumped onto the bed, crawling onto Wanda to get to Y/N. Safe to say, that woke Wanda up pretty quickly. Hope started to bounce on Y/N, effectively waking her and Natasha up as well.

“Mommy, mommy, you have to get up. I have to go to daycare. Y/N let out a groan, and when she did, she felt something coming up from her stomach. As fast as she could, she moved Hope off of her, jumped over Wanda, and made a b-line for the bathroom. When she got there, she started throwing up into the toilet.

Hope came in after Y/N and sat next to her. “Do you want me to call Aunty? I would ask the other two, but they don’t look any better than you.” Hope was on her knees with her hand in her lap. Wanda came in right after Hope had said that. Y/N looked like Wanda was about to seconds from falling face-first onto the floor. Y/N shifted her sight from Wanda to Hope.

“Little love, why don’t you call Aunty and tell her you’re going to be staying with her until mommy’s all better.” Hope got excited and shouted okay a little too loud, causing the newly sick people to flinch. Hope followed by saying sorry in a much softer voice and ran off.

Y/N went into the room and crashed on the bed. “You look like crap.” Y/N lifted her face from the bed to look at Natasha. “Haha. Well, you’re not looking any better, hot stuff.” Y/N groaned again and hid her face in the bed.

As all the adults were having a terrible time with their fever, Hope was in her room calling Maria with Y/N’s phone. “Sup asshole, whatcha calling for?” Hope was very confused as to what that word meant, so she asked. “Aunty, what’s an asshole?”

On the other end of the line, Maria’s eyes went wide. “Hope! What are you doing with your mom's phone?” “Mommy and the other girls here are sick, so she said to call you. I need you to take me to daycare.”

Maria waited for her heartbeat to slow down before she responded. That’s when she realized Hope said ‘other girls’. That meant that Wanda and Natasha were there. And Maria being Maria, assumed that something 18+ happened. So with a smile on her face, she said. “Okay, I’ll be right over.”

When Maria hung up, Hope ran to Y/N’s room and jumped onto the bed. “Aunty Maria said she’s on her way, mommy.” Y/N gave her hum and stroked her head.

---------------

When Maria got there, she let herself in and went straight to Y/N’s room. Maria leaned against the open door with a smirk. Natasha was lying down with her arm covering her eyes. Y/N had her feet tangled with Natasha’s and her hands covering her face. And Wanda was in the bathroom hunched over the toilet.

“Wow, the three of you look like crap.” Maria laughed but refused to enter the room with the sick people. Y/N just sticks her hand up and to give her the middle finger. Natasha and Wanda feel too much like crap to care that someone they barely know is seeing them at their weakest.

Hope came out of the bathroom where she tried helping Wanda by rubbing her back, saying, ‘mommy rubs my back when I get sick. Hope ran into Maria’s arms, and Maria lifted her up. “Hey there, pretty girl. How are you?”

“I’m okay, but mommy and her friends aren’t.” Hope tilted her head with doe eyes. “Yeah, well, with all the se-“ Maria looked at Hope in the eyes, and Hope looked at her confused. “Fun adult stuff they were no doubt doing if one of them were sick, it would make sense that all of them are now.”

“What fun adult stuff?” Hope brows were furrowed, looking between her mom and Maria. “Maria, we didn't do anything like that. Hope was sick, and they came over to help.” With a huff, Hope crossed her arms and made a pouting face. Then a face of remembrance crossed her face. “Mommy, what’s an asshole?” Y/N shot up and looked at her daughter. Maria's eyes went wide, but Y/N assumed it was because she was surprised. “Hope, where did you hear that word?”

“Aunty Maria. When I called you, she said, ‘Sup asshole’” Maria covers Hope's mouth to try to get her to stay quiet. Y/N gave Maria a death glare. “MARIA HILL, I SWEAR!” Maria started to run downstairs.

”MARIA HILL! DAMN YOU, AT LEAST DON’T FORGET HOPE’S BAG!” Maria got Hope's bag and left as fast as she could. She could deal with Y/N rath some other time.

Natasha was trying hard not to laugh, but eventually, she couldn’t hold it. Y/N gave Natasha a death glare. Wanda came out from the bathroom and put her hands on her shoulder. “Why don’t we all take a nap and calm down.”

Y/N took a breath and lay on Wanda’s chest. Y/N decided she’d give Maria a piece of her mind when she was better.

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