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greenninjagal-blog · 2 years

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Here Come the Sun (pt1)

Sometimes I have aus in my archives for so long I can’t even think of something witty to put at the beginning of them. Anyway! Have a new fic!

Summary: Virgil used to dream about being a hero, but the combination of his best friend's and his lives being at stake forces him to do some things good guys don't do and, well... that sort of thing doesn't seem to be in the cards anymore. However, he also didn't count on the guy he was sent to kidnap being Patton Hart.

Words: 4606

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Chapter One: Windy

The truth is Virgil Storm knew that he was going down a dark path long before it ever came to kidnapping the heir to a multimillion dollar cross country railway company. The writings had been on the walls, on the ground, carved in his skin from the moment he had first realized that no one was going to love that rain cloud over his head.

He’d tried. Virgil had tried for a while! Really gave it his best shot, he swears! But in the end, food costs money and people hate when he stays around for extended periods of time and he had gotten sick of finding knives in his back (literally).

So he’s not a good person anymore. And he knows it even now while he’s threading down the cobblestone streets that usually would have been pedestrian only on a borrowed magic cycle, listening to the music of the rain landing and skillfully avoiding the puddles as he goes about his job, albeit at a slower pace than he really should.

He’d heard rumors that Magnolia was a bright and sunny place to be; Remus had come back from trashing Star Burst’s guild hall complaining about the cheerful people and the cloudless sky and how the sun had heated up his piercings and chains uncomfortably. It’s fitting that Virgil’s own trip to the town has been herald by thunderstorms.

Even with his poncho hood up, Virgil’s bangs are soaking wet and his jeans are plastered to his legs from the angle of the rain. He’s cold, as usual, always cold, and it makes him wonder after that allusive feeling of warmth that Remus talks about sometimes.

He understands it in theory: He can make water boil with a thought for tea when Remus’s inhuman immune system finally succumbs after three days of non stop traveling in the rain, he’s gotten close enough to fire for his body to start sizzling, and, of course, there’s that feeling of tingly-ness he gets when Remus tackles him in hugs after rolling around in the mud, despite his frantic yelling for him not to.

But come on, Remus said there was a giant orb in the sky made of fire that makes everyone feel that tingly feeling when they're out under it. It sounds completely made up! If everyone didn't have the same delusion, Virgil wouldn't have believed him at all.

But, to be fair, it's also not his fault he's never seen the sun.

After all, it's not like he asked to be born. He came into the world kicking and screaming and his cries had caused lightning to hit the hospital, rains to pelt the windows, thunder to boom.

“Inherent magic,” the doctors said. “One of the strongest cases we’ve ever seen! He’s a weather witch!”

And really after twenty years of hearing that repeatedly, it feels like a cosmic joke. He’s not a weather witch; the only thing he’s managed to do is make it rain harder. Not that anyone has ever believed him when he says it.

He learned quickly to hide himself away when the other kids at the orphanage got restless from weeks inside and the abundance of rain because they liked to take their frustrations out on him. When he started travelling the country, he got used to the cursing of passersby caught in the sudden rain that followed him around. His first crush called him gloomy, his second called him dreary, the third told him to pick one to stay, him or the rain and that night Virgil had found out that he can’t drown no matter how much he tries.

But Remus... Virgil doesn’t know where he’d be without Remus. It’s a double edged sword masquerading as a question; what would have become of Virgil if he hadn’t come to town at the same time as Remus had been leaving, and Virgil is a coward by nature so he avoids thinking about it too hard.

They had run into each other about four towns away, both of them just shy of eighteen and Virgil ghosting through the city alone, lone, lonely because his rain had driven everyone else inside. Remus had nearly bowled him over, in the middle of jumping in the puddles like he was getting paid to do it. He’d splashed Virgil and then when Virgil had snapped at him, he’d grabbed Virgil by his poncho and pulled him into another puddle face first.

With a mouth full of sharpened teeth and a laugh that sounded like he’d been eating industrial nails, Remus had managed to make Virgil smile for probably the first time ever.

Remus is like a candle, unafraid of the way that Virgil's always doused every flame he’s come across, accidentally or not. He’s loud, he’s unconventional, and he’s absolutely insane.

It had taken Virgil a while to understand why the locals called him “The Building Eater” but after watching Remus nearly unhinge his jaw and take a bite out of the steel frame of a half constructed building they were walking by with no warning at all….well it started to make sense. With his red eyes blazing with mischief and his tendency to create chaos just for his own entertainment, Virgil could see why anyone would call Remus crazy and run away screaming.

But Virgil had also seen Remus on late nights, half a barrel of wine gone, and his smile falling to something more lost and sad as they sat alone at the bar counter after having terrified the bar owner out of the building for the night.

“I don’t do friends,” Remus said once with the rain tap, tap, tapping on the windows behind them. “No point in it. Everyone leaves in the end anyway.”

“What a coincidence!” Virgil had responded, far more drunk than he’d ever meant to be because wine and water mix extremely well and somehow he always forgets that. “Hey, what’s your opinion on the rain?”

Virgil knows what it’s like to be sad and lost and alone. It's not a feeling he'd wish on anyone, especially not someone like Remus, who never once asked him to turn off the rain, who tilts his head upwards into the drizzle with a smile, who jumps in puddles and throws mud at anyone who says the downpour was ruining their day.

Everyone leaves, but not Virgil, but not Remus. They made a pact and however drunken it was, Virgil doesn’t go back on his word.

Which is why he’s in Magnolia. Kidnapping a guy.

For Remus.

Virgil blows out a breath and the rain thickens just a bit. The puddles are starting to flood the street, which is unfortunate, because he doesn’t think that the shop owners around here have flooding insurance. If there hadn’t been a startling lack of rain for the past few weeks, the river that flows through the middle of the famed merchant city would have already hit the flooding mark and he’d be driving through more than just a centimeter of water.

If he wasn’t out of here in thirty minutes there was a good chance he wasn’t going to be leaving at all. And he was pretty sure the excuse of “Oh I have negative emotions about doing legally wrong things” was not going to fly with anyone if that happened.

He hopes that Remus is having a good time, because he’s very much not.

Once upon a time he had dreamed of joining Star Burst, of wearing that bright star shaped guild mark on his chest, of having billions of friends and taking on exciting jobs to help people all over the country and then coming back to a safe and welcoming home. But then again, who hadn’t dreamed of such a thing? Even the orphanage caretaker had a subscription to Sorcerer’s Weekly which kept a ranking of all the magic guilds in the country and personal interviews with members from the more popular ones. Virgil used to sneak reads of the magazines before she had caught him and told him that he should maybe aim a little lower than the nation’s top magic guild since he couldn’t even control his own magic and he was nearing twelve. After he hit the road, he had snuck looks at a couple news stands, just to keep up to date.

Thomas Sanders led the guild, having founded it from the ground up when he realized that the other magic guilds in the area didn’t click with him. He had a heart warming interview a few years ago about “a sense of belonging and family” being the central idea of his guild which Virgil had cut out and then drowned in a puddle until the paper had dissolved into sludge. Despite the sentimentality of their leader, the guild had quickly grown into the most powerful, most out-of-control magic guild ever.

People liked to joke that the Magic Council formed specifically to keep Star Burst in line. It had always struck Virgil as odd about how many countless times that Thomas had willingly gone head-to-head in the court to defend his members, much less how many more times he came out victoriously. Virgil knows that his own guildmaster would never, and even on his worst days, Virgil's monsoons had caused a lot less property damage than Star Burst had in their endeavors.

((For example: just a few months ago, during a job reportedly where they were supposed to deliver a package to someone at the top of a mountain that was bordered by somewhat dangerous Vulcans, several Star Burst members ended up stumbling on a secret Dark Magic Guild by the name of Cosmic Dust that had been experimenting on the local fauna with magic rituals, which the Star Burst members interrupted and caused a seventy foot tall raging plant monster to emerge and decimate four other mountains before somehow being stopped. Three different towns came together to applaud them for a job well done.

That same week, Virgil and Remus were hired to fight lizardmen in an underground sewer system and they nearly got fined for blocking the water system for three hours while they hunted down the last of the creatures.))

Thomas Sanders is charismatic, personable, amicable. When Virgil was a kid, he dreamed that Thomas would suddenly get this urge to adopt kids and that Virgil would somehow catch his eyes and Thomas would look at him with that just… stupidly kind expression and his thunderstorms would magically melt away and prove that it was never anything wrong with him.

Not that anything like that ever happened. Now it’s just an embarrassing memory: Thomas is just a guy, not some miracle worker and Virgil is tragedy incarnate, not something an average guy can fix.

But it helped that Thomas is one of the top ten most powerful mages in the entire world, wielding Celestial magic that allows him to call for aid from the beings of the constellations themselves. All that and it’s still without having any of the so-called most powerful gold keys; he redefined the world of holder-type magic by using the “lower powered” keys to build himself up into what he was.

Or at least that’s what the papers say. Virgil’s an inherent magic type, as is Remus. Their magic both originates from their bodies in strong enough bursts to form their own attacks and the idea of having conduit keys or cards or books or anything to focus their powers just sounds ridiculous.

But hey, if it works, it works, Virgil guesses. Thomas is considered formidable enough that Virgil is pretty sure if he ever came face to face with the guy, he’d probably explode into a puddle, kind smiles or not. He’s number one on the list of people that Virgil doesn’t want to have to fight, and considering that Magnolia is the home of the Star Burst Magic Guild, and Virgil is about to kidnap one of their mages… the possibility of facing off with their leader is greater than the usual zero probability Virgil likes to keep it at.

He hopes desperately that everything has been going according to plan with everyone else. Guildmaster Clay had told him that his target was likely going to be the only one that remained behind when Star Burst struck out for vengeance against Remus’s attack on their empty guildhall and subsequent hospitalization of two of the main healers from the guild, but in Virgil’s experience people’s minds can change just as easily as the weather can go from sunny to thunderstorms. If his target isn’t there he’s going to be screwed. If someone other than his target is there he’s also screwed.

Not that he can’t take another person in a fight. The Guildmaster said to be quiet and quick and if they wanted a lot of noise about this job… well anyone else from the guild probably would have been sent.

Virgil takes the next corner faster than he probably should, skidding through a puddle, and feeling the water drip down his poncho, sliding off the waterproof surface and flying off into the empty air behind him. Thunder rumbles overhead like a dissatisfied customer, but no lightning yet, which is comforting if only because it means he’s got a little bit of control over his own emotions. He eases off the accelerator, flexing his stiff fingers in their waterproof gloves, and shifting his boots against the foot rests, as he ready his brakes.

Part of him hopes that maybe the info had been wrong; maybe this guy had actually been with the rest of the guild in a last minute switch! Maybe the rumors about Remus had freaked him out and he skipped town last night, never to be seen again. Maybe Virgil drove all the way out here, memorized the whole city layout, and spent all this time agonizing over doing this, all for nothing!

But as soon as he thinks it, he turns the last corner and glances up at the building that some of the Star Burst members have been set up in while repairs of the guildhall are discussed. There are lights on in the window, shading half the street in soft yellow light.

Virgil sighs, coming to a stop right outside the door. He takes one moment to glance up at the darkening sky, wishing that Remus was here, and then he peels off the magic cycle SE plug that powers it. Part of his arm is buzzing nervously in a way that feels remarkable like having electricity shot through him (which unfortunately Virgil knows what that feels like). He shakes it off and heads for the front door.

Locks and Virgil had a questionable relationship at best: he understood that locks were meant to keep people out, or other people in, but considering the number of times that the other kids in the orphanage had locked him in a closet to get him to stop the rain, or the orphanage head had locked him in his room to make sure the other boys could do something worse to him, or that he hadn’t been able to pay for a room at the local hotel when he needed just a bed to sleep in for the night….Virgil had gotten used to by passing all sorts of locks with barely a thought.

After all, what were locks when Virgil’s body could condense into puddles on command? The gap between the door and the doorframe was near negligible, but he slips under and finds himself standing in a cute foyer, his poncho dripping sadly onto the rug.

If it weren't for the ache in his collarbone he could have pretended he was coming back home after a grueling but successful job as a mediocre mage that everyone at least somewhat respected. One of the Good Guys, with capital G’s who never had to do anything illegal and didn’t lie awake at night thinking about the possibility of dying tomorrow.

((Virgil’s doing great. Thanks for asking.))

It’s quiet inside, nearly silent if it weren’t for the rhythmic sound of rain hitting the outside of the building, dancing on the window panes, drumming on the roof itself to be heard. If Virgil listens faintly he can even hear the humming from upstairs and the accompanying footsteps that cause the ceiling to creak and groan. Virgil reaches behind himself and flicks the lock knob to open in case things go poorly, although he doubts it’s going to.

It doesn’t take him long to show himself around: the building is really only made for maybe three people although he thinks that four have been living there since Remus wrecked the guild hall where most of them lived. There are pictures on the walls of various members that Virgil recognizes from magazines and framed photos of people that Virgil thinks they might have helped over the one year that he’s been at the guild. They all look stunningly happy and pleased and Virgil drags his gaze away before the guilt in his stomach makes him throw up or the jealousy in his lungs makes him drench the whole apartment.

The pantry is decently stocked for the amount of people that must live there and Virgil helps himself to a granola bar that he likes and shuffles over to the kitchen drawers. It takes him a few minutes to find the one with the silverware, but he grabs all the spoons they have and stuffs them in his pockets for Remus to delight over later. There are sticky notes around the kitchen with little reminders and a few recipes that someone was trying out, a large sign on the microwave to “Logan” about it being a food microwave and not a science one. A bowl of fruit is on the counter with fresh yellow apples.

Virgil snags one as he walks by replacing it with his granola bar wrapper, heading towards the living room which has a cute little news lacrima and several bookshelves. The couch is covered in blankets and pillows and a suitcase sits packed by the side out of the way, confirming the idea that there’s an extra person staying there for the time being, but who had cleared out with the other occupants to avenge the despicable act done against them and their pride. Virgil tries his best not to roll his eyes at their predictability.

Instead he takes a bite out of his apple, skimming over the book titles in an attempt to slow his rapidly beating heart. Lightning flashes outside, followed by a grumble of thunder so loud it shakes the house.

In a way, it reminds Virgil of Remus’s laughter, the heavy and deep noise that’s also boisterous and booming. It’s a comfort, not that Virgil would ever stoop so low as to tell Remus that; he could just imagine all the ways that Remus would think to terrorize him with the incessant mocking.

The books are mostly magic books: scholarly textbooks that define different types of magics, a few demonology encyclopedias, and at least three versions of a scientific journal covering the ideas of parallel universes. A few of them are more well loved than others, and Virgil can tell by the number of creases in the spines and markers between the pages. He’s never been interested in learning different types of magic like these books seem to promote, but Virgil thinks he has the same copy of “History of Arcana for Dummies” in his chest back at the guild. He takes another bite out of his apple as he plucks the book from the shelf to see what the members of Star Burst have to say about the Water Magic chapter and then--

“Oh!” A voice behind him says. “Hello!”

Virgil whips around biting his tongue instead of the apple piece in his mouth and nearly choking in the same movement. He hadn’t realized the humming from upstairs had gotten drowned out by his rain until he comes face-to-face with the owner of the humming himself, standing in the kitchen apparently finished with whatever task he’d been doing upstairs.

The picture hadn’t done Patton Hart justice.

The picture, of course, had been a few years old and Patton hadn’t been smiling at all; his professional monkey suit and the glossy covers of the picture had made him look like an untouchable doll in a display case, to be shown off but never played with. The smile had been practiced and courtly and looked so rich that Virgil’s teeth had set on edge. He had looked like the type of guy who’s emotions were store bought.

Now he looks nothing like that picture. In fact, Virgil thinks he looks like an actual person: cheap factory made clothes, knee high cat themed socks and shoes that had seen their way through at least three hiking trips based on the scoffs. His knees each had a brightly colored band aid on them and his arms had an array of braided friendship bracelets made with care and precision and something else equally foreign to Virgil.

Honestly, Virgil wouldn’t have even pegged him as a mage if it weren’t for the hip packs that held his deck of magic cards and the star shaped guild mark on his right hand.

And if it weren’t for the freckles and the bright blue eyes, Virgil might not have even recognized him as the runaway heir. ((Virgil wishes he had run a little further than just seven towns away, and that he’d maybe even used a different name when he was hiding. Come on, man.))

“Oh dear!” Patton says as a sheet of rain slams against the walls of the house from all sides. “Did you slip in here trying to get out of this storm? You poor thing, you’re soaking wet! Here, let me get you some dry clothes before you catch a cold. I can put on some tea to warm you up--”

The idiot didn’t even reach for that deck of cards at the sight of an unknown, possibly dangerous stranger in his home. Virgil doesn’t know if that makes him feel better or worse.

“Just so you know,” Virgil says, cutting into the kind babbling, “I am really sorry about this.”

Patton blinks at him from behind those black glasses. His eyes are so innocent and naive and “Hmm? Sorry about what? Breaking in? I’m sure it's just a misun--”

“Waterlock.”

At Virgil’s focus and spell, the floor under Patton bursts into the familiar magic circle spell, glistening with his deep sea indigo-blue color and flooding the room in the sudden light. Water explodes from everywhere: the command pulling droplets from the air, dragging the rain from outside under the door, the pipes groan and ache where the faucets burst and it all crashes down on Patton without a warning, wrapping him up in a sphere of unbreakable water.

The Star Burst member’s mouth opens to scream reflectively, but the water just pours down his throat and strangles his lungs. He thrashes against the lock, and Virgil watches somewhat guiltily.

“I’m sorry,” Virgil says again. “Don’t fight it, please. I don’t want to hurt you. I’m really sorry about this.”

Lightning strikes outside, and the lights in the house flicker threatening to plunge them into darkness. Patton fumbles for his cards, but Virgil’s been drowning people since he was sixteen.

“It’s like falling asleep,” he says, as Patton goes limp and three of his cards float aimlessly in the sphere next to him. “It’s like a really bad way to fall asleep. I’m so sorry. But it’s going to be okay. I swear.”

He lets the spell drop, and catches the weakly coughing Patton in his arms before he can hit the ground. The heir tries to push him away, but he’s too weak in the end to do much more than slump over, spitting out water, and let Virgil hold him while he wipes the area clean of those droplets that don't belong there.

“That’s it,” he murmurs softly. “Go to sleep.”

Patton makes a pitiful noise that sounds like him fighting it, but he’s unconscious before it forms actual words that can stab Virgil through his bleeding heart. Virgil sets him carefully on the floor, running his hands through the air over him to pull the water from his clothes and his hair. He takes one last bite of his apple before dropping it and the book on the bookshelf and getting out the rope from his small hip pouch.

Tying up the Star Burst member is unfortunately very easy. He doesn't stir at all while Virgil maneuvers his arms behind his back and begins the knots that he’s decently practiced in. Making sure that the bonds aren’t too tight, but still prevent him from moving, Virgil leans back and unhooks the hip bags that contain his cards and leaves them on the sofa, because the last thing he needs is for Patton to somehow get out and manage to get his cards and force Virgil to actually fight him.

Also Virgil doesn’t try to be an asshole. Card Magic isn’t technically inherent, but even Virgil knows it’s tradition to pass down cards from from generation to generation. If they made it back to the guild it was likely someone would appropriate them for some quick cash, and Virgil feels bad enough about this as it is.

He sighs, checking the clock in the kitchen. He knows that he’s cutting his window for the kidnapping close (“Quick and Quiet”), but he’s also not a monster, so he takes the time to find the closet and picks out a raincoat that looks like it would fit Patton and secures it over the guys back, flipping the hood up to cover his dirty blond curls.

“Sorry,” He says one last time, as he picks up the heir. “Really, if I had another choice I would have done that. I swear.”

Patton probably doesn’t care, and definitely won’t in the future when he realizes what exactly is going on here. Part of Virgil aches for the narrative that Patton had thought was going on: that he was just a traveler caught in the storm having gotten turned around and lost and walked into the first place he found for solace. Tea with Patton sounded like it would have been lovely, homey, and cozy in a way that Virgil had never experienced before-- a dream that he had spent most of his teen years wishing would actually happen when he crawled his way into a new city.

He opens the front door to the house and carefully steps out into the rain again, making sure to regulate his internal water temperature to something he thinks might be “warm” enough to keep Patton from freezing on their journey.

His magic cycle is waiting patiently and Virgil sets both of them up gently with Patton sitting in his lap, with Patton resting against his chest, sleeping soundly with the rain hitting the hood of his jacket softly. Virgil straps on the SE plug again, hits the ignition, and swings back into the road, back the way that he had come into town without a single person peeking out of their curtains.

“For Remus,” Virgil whispers to himself. “Rule Four, for Remus.”

Luckily there’s still a two hour drive to Chimera Tongue’s Secondary Guild Hall, and Virgil can spend all of it imagining the faces of Patton’s friends when they come back to find him missing without a trace.

[Next Chapter]

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #fairy tail #because I have no self control #kidnapping #drowning #Virgil is a water mage #Patton is a card mage

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anxiouslyfred · 2 years

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Virgil Cooks

for @dukexietyweek prompt Food

Summary: Virgil cooks and Remus asks to be cooked for

/\/\

Virgil cooks.

That's really all there is to it. Virgil cooks for himself, for his friends, for just about anyone really.

He cooks.

Now you'd be mistaken if you thought that Virgil believed he's good at cooking or that he ever believed any compliments he received. In fact the only person who wouldn't get immediately shut down when praising the things Virgil cooked was Remus and that because he, like pretty much everyone, saw Remus eating things straight from the bin, or food abandoned on picnic tables. It was nice for him to hear that at the very least his food was better than rubbish.

It didn't mean he expected to have Remus come over asking for food and claiming it was the only thing palatable to him.

“Seriously my food isn't that good.” Virgil half scowled, letting Remus in regardless and heading into the kitchen.

Remus made a protesting noise before replying, “Better than the places Roman's been dragging me to.”

Digging through the cupboards for something quick to cook, he glanced over his shoulder. “I could swear you don't lie so what game are you playing?” Virgil asked.

“I'm playing I want good food so am asking the best cook I know for it.” Remus had perched on a counter, legs swinging and hands tapping as if holding cutlery and hurrying food along.

“Sounds fake. I don't think Roman's been taking you to dumps, has he?” He scowled a little, mentally checking he would need that counter space for the dish he'd decided to cook.

Remus waved one hand. “Nah. Uppity places that would be scandalised if a decent portion was put on a plate.”

He nodded at that, well aware of the minimal portions posh restaurants provided to try and get more money spent at them. “Okay I can believe you hate posh food but there's infinitely better cooks than me even in our friends.”

“There isn't and I'm feeling half starved so please cook while arguing with the compliments cause I ain't taking them back.” Remus immediately argued, acting as if it wasn't clear Virgil was already cooking from the ingredients he'd pulled out and the pots he was now looking for.

“How about instead of compliments that sound entirely exaggerated, you tell me just how you've convinced Ro to stop domesticating you for the post world?” Virgil suggested.

Remus took that option willingly, but still included some complimentary comparisons to Virgil's food in the stories. He was fairly sure they were stories, given a riot breaking out in any high end restaurant would definitely make the news. So would someone releasing rats into any restaurant which Remus would probably have had to escape the police for doing as well.

“And then Ro was angry and demanding to know why he couldn't just have a nice meal out with his brother and I said that you're a better dinner date and a better cook than he or any of the chefs in the shmancy places. So now Prissy is all upset because he wants to matchmake for us but I said I can do the charming on my own.” Remus was saying as Virgil served up the finished meal, very nearly spilling it.

“Rewind, actually rewind and freeze! I'm no chef and nobody likes me like that, so what the hell are you thinking saying any of that bullshit to your brother? You know he gets stars in his eyes at any suggestion of a crush unless concerned that he might be experiencing one.” He snapped, slamming the pot back onto the side and whirling to glare at Remus.

Remus blinked for a moment before snickering. “I can be nobody if you want me to be. I like you, wanna date you, so if that makes me nobody then I can do that! Besides!” Remus jumped up, grabbing both plates and cutlery that had been placed next to it up to go through to the table. “This is basically a dinner date already. Just need to throw in kissing, maybe some touching or cuddling, and it'll be a perfect one.”

“Normally people just ask for a date, not beg to be cooked for as if having been starved all week.” Virgil grumbled, carefully not agreeing or disagreeing to anything. He wasn't sure what reaction either would have given how unpredictable Remus was about everything else.

“Then you get nervous and lash out, tearing down anything you might like about a person and turning it into an insult.” Remus stated, reminding Virgil of the few times he'd been asked out in public and blew the chance because getting flustered made him want to fight the cause.

As they sat down and Remus finally returned the meal Virgil had dished for himself to him, he finally figured out what he'd prefer. “We can treat this as a practice date. If it goes to hell or I screw something up, You have to promise nothing will change between us and our friendship stays as it is.”

“I promise I will only fall in love with you more if things get exciting tonight, even if you view it as mistakes.” Remus quoted instead.

A roll of Virgil's eyes was all the reply given for a few moments as they began to eat.

At the end of the night, Virgil found himself agreeing to another date, and wondering how, when he's the one who cooks, Remus was the one who managed to prove that food is the way to a person's heart.

#dukexietyweek2022 #dukexiety #remus sanders #virgil sanders #cooking #virgil cooks #fluff

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lily-janus · 2 years

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Attraction? Who's she? Never heard of her...

Summary: Virgil's story

Character: Virgil centered, with a bit of Remus and Patton at the start and just Patton at the end.

Warnings: hyperventilating, panic attacks, being pressured into dating, mistaking different kinds of attraction for romantic attraction. I think that's it.

Word count: 1,764

Day 3! This one I'm less sure about... but hope it makes sense idk.

@aro-sides-week day 3 tertiary attraction

.......

"...and that's how our relationship started! Patton began telling me about the aromantic spectrum and after some digging I found a term that seemed fitting to me! So this is my story everyone, of how I met my dear Patty-cake and realized I'm Aroflux!"

Virgil listened as Remus capped off his story, bewilderment overtaking him. That fast? One day of meeting each other and they decided to jump into a relationship they didn't even know how it was going to look like? Just like that?! That's insane, Virgil would have run off the moment he realized there's no chance his feelings will be reciprocated… or the moment Patton started walking in his direction…

Okay maybe it's just because Virgil's a huge coward but that's still pretty insane right?

"Like what you're seeing, hot stuff?" Suddenly all eyes turned on Virgil and he realized he was staring.

His face burned in embarrassment. "S-sorry…" he stammered, playing with the strings of his hoodie nervously, willing for everyone's attention to be turned back to the center of the circle, away from him.

"Aw it's okay, Kiddo! I will admit our story is pretty shocking." Patton smiled reassuringly at him. "Would you like to share yours next?"

"Oh um…" no, no he would rather die on the spot right this second- no, wait, this is why you came here! Stop being such a chicken and suck it up already!

"You don't have to-"

"Yeah! Tell us the juicy details!"

"Remus, this stuff is very personal, he has every right to-"

"Okay… yeah I'll… I'll share." Virgil managed to say, palms getting increasingly sweaty and his body temperature rising up as he tried to take deep breaths.

Patton still looked concerned. "I promise no one will get upset if you don't feel comfortable sharing…"

"No, no it's fine. I came here cause… I need a place to share it… get it out of my system you know? I just know that most people in my life will just be confused so… just, give me a minute…" Virgil explained. "But um… can I stay here? I don't think I can stand in the center like that…"

Patton nodded. "Of course! You can tell it from wherever you want, Remus, do you want to sit back in your seat?" He turned to his partner.

Remus shook his head with a grin. "Nope! I'm good here!" He said, shuffling even closer to Patton and resting his head on his shoulder. "If it's okay of course… I mean, if you're in the mood for it." Remus looked up to meet Patton's eyes.

"Actually…" Patton started.

Remus took a step back. "Space, got it." He winked and Patton sighed in relief as he took back his original seat.

"Thank you, Remus." He smiled fondly at him before turning back to Virgil. "You ready?"

Virgil took one, final breath, then nodded. Clearing his throat, he began his story…

-------------------------------------------------------

"You're staring~" Valery nudged Virgil in the ribs and shook him out of his day-dreaming.

His cheeks flared. "I'm not! I just… think they look cool okay? It's not a big deal…"

Valery just grinned. "Hey guys! Our Virgil has a crush!" She suddenly called out to the rest of the group.

"What? No I don't! I just admire their style…" Virgil desperately tried to explain but it was clear from their faces that no one was buying it.

Was it a crush? How does one know for certain?

"Go talk to him! Aww you'll be such a cute couple!" One of his friends cooed.

"Wow let's not jump that far okay? I just think they look good- hey!" Another friend started pushing him towards the guy in question, Virgil's heart beating in his chest so loudly he was sure they could all hear it.

"C'mon, don't be shy Virgie, I'm sure he likes you too!" And with that he was shoved right in front of the guy's face.

The guy turned to look at him curiously. "Hello there." Was all he said.

Virgil swallowed. Okay Virgil, so you have a crush on this guy… apparently… how do people talk to their crushes?

"Umm… hi… do you… come here often?" He used a line he saw on a film once.

The guy looked around. "You mean, to school? Kind of have to, you know…"

Virgil's cheeks got redder as his embarrassment grew, oh god, what was he doing here?

"I… have to go to the bathroom…" he ran out of there as fast as he could, pulling his hoodie up and trying to hide away as much as possible.

That was terrifying! How the hell do people do it?! How the hell do people find dates?? ….I'm going to be alone forever aren't I?

After that he was very scared from the whole dating thing and tried to avoid it as much as possible, but he couldn't hide from the matter for long…

"So, Virgil, do you have a special someone?"

Virgil nearly choked on his water as his aunt's question drew all of the dinner residents' attention.

"Ah… it's.. kinda hard for me… with my anxiety disorder and all…" he stammered through an explanation.

"Aw that shouldn't stop you! Your soulmate is out there hun! You just need to be brave enough to look for it!" His aunt declared in her theatrical voice. Easy for her to say, she met her husband when they were kids, she never had to deal with the whole dating ordeal! Not that that ever stopped her from being a hopeless romantic…

Virgil just nodded with a shaky smile. "Yeah…" he returned to drinking his water as everyone's attention drifted off. He locked eyes with his mom, a look he knew meant 'we'll talk about this later'... Virgil really didn't want to talk about it…

"I thought you said you were making progress with your therapist." His mom said after all the guests left.

"Yeah I don't think breathing exercises will help me talk to a complete stranger and ask him on a freaking date out of nowhere… or however this dating shit works." Virgil grumbled. "Can't I just avoid this forever?"

His mom gave him a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. "Aw you don't mean that sweetie, you don't want to be lonely all your life right? I'm sure you'll get it soon, everyone does."

"I have friends you know…" Virgil muttered.

"Sure, but it's not the same, what will you do when they find dates? Join them?" His mom chuckled. "But it doesn't have to be strangers you know, how about Valery? You two seem close." His mom suggested.

Virgil burst into laughter that died down when he realized his mom wasn't smiling. "Oh… you're serious… mom, we're friends." He stated the obvious.

His mom shook her head with a smile. "Honey… you were cuddling in the last sleepover."

Virgil's cheeks reddened. "So? She's a good cuddler… it doesn't mean anything."

"Right…" his mom winked, making Virgil even more uncomfortable. "Just think about it dear."

Virgil sighed as she walked away. Maybe she's right… I always want to hug and cuddle Valery… in movies that usually means romantic feelings…

…

"Virgil? You okay? You look nervous…" Valery said in their next meet up with their friends.

"I'm always nervous." Vitgil shrugged, bitting his nails anxiously.

Valery didn't look convinced. "C'mon, let's talk in private, even if it's something 'dumb' or whatever you think it is." She smiled and tugged on his arm slightly.

Virgil smiled a bit, she really was a really good friend, always paying attention to everyone around her's mental state, going out of her way to help in anyway she can… Virgil really liked being around her…

It THAT what a crush is? …maybe… so… he should just go for it… right? That's what they always do in media…

"So what's up, you can tell me anything." Valery smiled in a way that always made him feel safe.

"Um… my mom's starting to bug me about…" he gestured vaugely. "You know… dating and stuff…" he stuttered.

"Oh! Do you need me to play matchmaker? I can totally do that!" She grinned wildly.

Virgil's cheeks warmed. "N-no,no, that's not… doyouwannagooutwithme?" He blurted hasitily.

Valery frowned. "What was that? Couldn't hear you…"

"I… um… do you… want to.. go on a date.. with me?" He murmured.

"Oh!" Valery said in surprise.

"Forget it, it was stupid-"

"No, no, that actually sounds nice!" Valery smiled. "I just thought you're more into guys… but sure! I would love that!" She placed a kiss on his cheek and walked away.

Virgil rubbed his hand uncomfortablly. Well… I did it… is it supposed to feel this… weird and awkward? Though that's how I feel about most things so… it's probably nothing…

-------------------------------------------------------

"....so the date went horribly… as you might imagine and well, after that I kind of assumed I have no idea what romance is or supposed to feel like… I looked into it a bit and found out there's tons of different kinds of attraction that are not sexual or romantic…. And when I looked deeper I found the aromantic spectrum. I don't know… I don't have a specific label I use or something… I just know my relationship with romance is a bit more complicated than most people in my life… I haven't told anyone yet, well, except for you guys, now, I mean…" Virgil rumbled until finally he stopped himself, realizing his words don't make sense anymore and fell quiet.

"Sorry…" he said quietly, looking down. "I'm rumbling… maybe I shouldn't have come… maybe I'm just too stressed by everything and I'm not even on the spectrum… I should just go-" he started getting up.

"Wow, wow, hey. You have nothing to be sorry about, as I said, this is a safe place. And, I think we can all agree, figuring this out is super duper messy and complicated." Patton chuckled lightly, and the room filled with sympathetic chuckles.

"You don't have to know your exact label right away, or at all even! Heck, you might realize later you're bi or gay or whatever! That doesn't mean you don't belong here or you don't anymore since you realized that. You belong here as long as you want to be, capish?"

Virgil sat back down, something warm blooming in his chest… a sense of belonging he never felt before. "Yeah?" He smiled hopefully as Patton.

"Of course, kiddo!" Patton nodded.

And for the first time in his life, Virgil felt understood. Maybe coming here wasn't such a bad idea…

#sanders sides #arosidesweek2022 #aromantic #virgil sanders #remus sanders #patton sanders #Lily writes #day 3 tertiary attraction

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tracybirds · 2 years

Note

Hello! Sorry to hear you're unwell, and I hope your symptoms aren't too bad and that you have a speedy recovery.

Can I please get a ✨for Virgil? It's been a long exhausting week and I need a Vfix.

*hugs* you're definitely having a rougher week than me and I hope you enjoy the below! The good news is that I'm still testing negative with no symptoms - it's my flatmates you gotta feel for :( Good luck with your crazy day ahead and I hope you get a rejuvenation period soon <333

Subsequently, to anyone reading this: Since I'm stuck at home for another four days - this is an open invite for any prompts. This particular game is send a character + ✨and I shuffle all my music and write a oneshot based on the song! Pretty please bc I'm so bored lol...

So! I shuffled "She's So High" by Tal Bachman and the lyrics that inspired this are of course the classic chorus: “Cause she’s so high, high above me, she’s so lovely.”

This one has one-sided pining Virgil/Penny and I'm leaning into the idea that everyone has had a crush on Lady Penelope at some point and rightly so. Intended to be TAG-verse (just bc most of the VxP stuff I've seen is TOS)

---

They return to the island under the grey light of dawn and Virgil hardly pauses to watch the colour return to the world. He doesn’t need to, still alight and alive with the sights and sounds of his first society party. Dazed, he doesn’t hear Scott’s gentle ribbing nor Jeff’s bemused queries.

Instead, he stumbles up the stairs, thoughts swirling and all undeniably tugging him to the single, crystalline point in time when he met Lady Penelope.

His heart bounds ahead, thudding in his chest and so surely shining on his face that it’s all he can do to stammer his excuses and escape to his room.

There Virgil sits, the shimmering pinks of sunrise glowing on his cheeks and the memory of her soft lips on them warms him to his core.

The daydream grows beyond the reality of a friendly, gentle kiss goodbye, and he shoves his burning face in his hands, squeezing his eyes tightly against the trail of her ghostly touch.

“Stop it,” he whispers, half hysterical. “You know nothing can happen.”

Scott snickers in his head, nudging at an imagined John, grinning at him with an odd smile that was half sympathy and half reminiscence. They’d told him, pulled him aside in a way he had thought only happened in movies.

“Listen,” said Scott. “Just act normal when you meet Penelope.”

“Yeah, yeah, I won’t embarrass you in front of any of the girls,” he’d said, rolling his eyes.

“She’s not like the girls from school, she’s a Lady,” insisted Scott. “Just don’t fall for her, promise me.”

“Why?” he’d asked, little brother senses pinging immediately at the scent of dirt on Scott. “D’you like her or something?”

John snorted.

“Everyone likes Penny. She’s magnetic.”

“And her family has expectations,” said Scott, firmly. “Which don’t include an American farmboy from Kansas.”

“Isn’t Dad rich now?”

“That doesn’t matter to these people,” said John. “It’s the name they’re after, and ours means next to nothing.”

“The point is,” said Scott, “you should just guard that heart of yours a little. It’ll be easier on you both.”

Virgil groans, flopping back on the mattress. Like that had happened.

He’s only gone and done exactly what his brothers had warned him against, all sense leaving him in the overwhelming presence of gently amused laughter and a scent just like the vase of peonies on the kitchen table back in Kansas.

It’s fine.

He was in love and it was fine.

Virgil knows he can’t dwell, knows he needs to pull himself out of this stupor, but he’s drowning and the thought of her binds him even greater than the weight of gravity.

He stumbles to his desk, the soft notes of a new day arising, and sketches on scattered paper with a fevered hand.

She’s there too – the curl of her lips in the waves, the high angle of cheekbones in the plunging cliffs. Her laughs live in the birdsong and her bright eyes lend more sparkle to the dew than the sun in the sky.

The door slammed opened, and Scott’s cheery voice cut through the haze in his head as he entered.

“Dad wanted me to check on you,” he says, still grinning. “Reckons you might be drunk or something after that display. What’s that?”

Virgil instinctively shoved the paper away, cheeks burning over what must seem to be no more than a landscape.

Scott shrugged and threw himself on the bed.

“You’re not drunk though, are you?”

“Of course not.”

“No,” he says. “You’re just another idiot who’s fallen for Lady Penelope.”

The warm feeling in his chest that had begun to ebb ever since Scott doused it with friendlier familiarity suddenly blazes like hot coals.

“No, I haven’t.”

The denial falls easily from his lips, coloured in righteous anger and falsehood. The lie shocks him more than Scott who only sniggers.

He doesn’t think it should be so easy to cover over a feeling that has shaken his entire world.

“Yes, you have.”

John leans against the door frame, that same strange smile still playing on his lips.

“I told you, she’s magnetic.”

Virgil looks between his brothers and falls forward with his head in his hands. The truth simmers beneath the surface and he knows they can already see it. Maybe it’s been written on his face ever since she waltzed into the room and asked his name.

“She’s just… so lovely.”

“In every way,” agrees Scott, with no small amount of sympathy.

“A force to be reckoned with,” murmurs John.

His eyes are far away and he shakes his head, pulling him back into the present.

Scott barely spares a glance for him, his attention focusing intently on Virgil.

“So, what are you gonna do?”

“Do?” echoes Virgil.

“Yeah. Dad talked me out of it pretty quick, and John was too dead-set on space cadets for anything to happen. But you…”

He trailed off and Virgil saw an entire life in his words. A life where he ran through hellfire and British downpours, bold as Scott and sure as John, to sweep Penelope off her feet and bring her to a castle in the sky where he could love her and nothing more.

And he saw it clear as day, how he froze when Scott introduced them, how she looked him over with eager eyes and surmised his character without a word. How he would never persuade her to go, how they would both suffer for his foolishness.

“Nothing’s going to happen,” he says and the words sound hollow, their substance as flimsy as wisps of air without the fervent fire of love he felt mere minutes before.

Scott looks surprised for a second, but he doesn’t argue.

“And you’re okay with that?” asks John, eyes watching him carefully.

Virgil looks out the window. The sun still shines in the deep blue of the sky, but its light is cold. He can still hear her sigh in the wind, can still see the colour of her eyes in the sea. The vibrancy has faded but her touch is still there, blessedly changing the way he sees the world in a way he knows he’ll spend a lifetime trying to recapture. Already, he can feel a twinge of longing for the fantasy, only waiting for a moment’s silence to kindle the embers still glowing warm in his heart.

“I think so.”

“Good.”

He didn’t used to be so good at lying.

#poor guy #very relatable though 10 year old me saw the 2004 movie and my heart did the whole bump-de-bump thing *sigh*#anyway!!#virgil tracy #penelope creighton ward #virgil x penelope #you know how gords and penny are pen and ink.... well this can be pen and paint lol #okay i'm done now #thunderbirds are go #sometimes i fic

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oneletteredwondered · 4 years

Text

One of the Boys

Virgil is a new tenant to an apartment complex and his landlord seems real nice. He told Virgil that should he ever need anything fixed to just give a call. He managed to get over the anxiety of calling someone for help, now he needs to get over the gay panic he experiences every time his landlord sends ‘one of the boys’ over.

Pairing: Everyone has a crush on Virgil who is also gay for everyone.

Warnings: panic descriptions from talking over the phone/to new people. Possible second hand embarrassment, swearing

Prompt pic at the end.

In all fairness, Virgil loves his new place. Way more than the old place he used to live at least. At least here the walls weren’t cracked and seemed sturdy enough that he wouldn’t be able to hear his neighbors through them. While he does his sweep of the place, writing down anything that might be wrong so the landlord can’t blame them on him, there’s barely anything broken or messed up. A clear step up from his old apartment.

“What you say Oogies?” Virgil nods to the black cat lounging on the cat tower after he’s finished his walk through. The cat stares at him, he stares back. They blink slowly at the same time and Virgil puffs out a breath. OogieBoogie wasn’t fond of the move. Complaining loudly at every jostle of the cat carrier. Virgil wanted to let her out but couldn’t until all his stuff was moved in for her safety. Seems like he’s forgiven.

“Come on lazy bones,” He finagles the cat out of the tower and she curls over his shoulders, paws dipping into the hood of his hoodie, and purrs. He smiles and scratches at her chin. For the most part she blends into the patterned fabric, her grey stripes the only thing that pop out, and even then only barely.

Virgil locks the apartment door, cat on his shoulders, and walk-through papers in hand. They walk their way around the complex and to the main office building. Virgil almost hesitates, thinking maybe he should go tomorrow morning at a better time, but OggieBoogie nuzzles his head encouragingly.

“Yeah okay,” He whispers to the animal, knowing she’s smug as he opens the door. It’s fluorescently bright. There’s no one at the front desk. Virgil takes two steps, and nearly backs out, when a friendly face pops out of one of the offices.

“Oh Virgil!” Virgil lets out a sigh of relief. He recognizes the elderly face

“Hey Mr Sanders,” He gives an awkward wave. The cheery man laughs.

“You may call me Thomas you know,” He says smiling at his cat and waving to the animal. She blinks at him.

“Right, yeah, course, Mr. Thomas yeah,” Virgil says. Thomas gives him a fond smile but doesn’t correct him. Thank god. Thomas helped him fill out lease papers when he first came to check out new apartments. Honestly a blessing as Virgil had no idea what he was doing. Bonus that Thomas professed the place to be queer friendly as well. Virgil hung up his rainbow flag in the window the moment he found it.

“Oh I brought the walk through papers back,” He hands them over and Thomas takes them happily.

“Everything good so far?” He asks. Virgil nods, nothing on there that he thought needed fixing, at least right away.

“Oh,” Thomas says softly. Virgil tenses and Oogie starts purring on his shoulder to comfort him.

“Are you having problems with the lights?” Thomas asks, very sincerely. Virgil shrugs a little and Oogie shifts to accommodate his motions.

“Not really, nothing serious,” He tries to play it off. Thomas pouts at his papers.

“Some of the plugs not screwed in properly, not working, a light out in the laundry area,” Thomas ‘tsks’ as he reads off Virgil’s writing. He perks up and offers Virgil a bright smile.

“No worries at all! I’ll send one of the boys over to fix it.” He offers Virgil a wink and riffles through his pockets. He pulls out his wallet and inside it a business card for the office that he promptly hands over.

“You ever need anything fixed, do not be afraid to call ya hear?” Virgil just nods, taking the card with him.

“Wait the boys?” He finds himself questioning. Thomas smiles again with a flippant wave of his hand.

“It’s the name of the contractor company I have hired here for the apartments. Someone should be over in about an hour to help you with the lights.” And with that Thomas is walking away to his own office, leaving Virgil to go back to his new home.

“Shit,” He mutters as he now realizes. Company coming over, and his new home is a mess. He walks quicker than he normally does to try and clean a little before ‘one of the boys’ makes it over. Oogie is not as impressed.

Virgil does well distracting himself. He organizes the boxes and even rearranges the hazardously brought in furniture to his liking. Oogie is lounging in her cat tower again, watching him try not to be frantic. He’s in the middle of putting some tupperware containers in the cabinets when there’s a knock on the door.

He wipes his hands on his jeans to make sure they’re not sweaty, and opens the door. Somewhere in the back of his mind he debates slamming it shut but in the end remains frozen with the front door wide open. Cause there in front of him is an absolutely gorgeous guy, hair slicked back and a cunning smile.

“Good afternoon, my name is Damien. Mr. Sanders said you needed help with some of your lights?” His voice sounds like silk and though there’s a long scar across side of his face, it takes nothing away from his beauty.

“Uh yeah.” Virgil says awkwardly.

“Yeah, yeah,” He says even more awkwardly and moves to the side to let the guy in.

“Much appreciated,” The guy, Damien says. Virgil can’t tell if the dude is cheeky or not, but damn is he flustered trying not to stare at his arms and the way he moves in those white jeans. Who wears white jeans to fix things? Virgil should send them a thank you note.

“Which plugs were having issues?” Damien asks then and Virgil decides words are not needed just this moment and deigns to gesture as best he can. Damien smiles at him and sets to work straightening some of the plugs out and replacing one in the corner when he notices a crack in the casing.

“Excuse me, miss.” He hears Damien say and peeks over his kitchen counter to see Damien gently nudging Oogie away from some of his tools. Virgil whines.

“Oogies come on let the man do his job,” Virgil goes over and scoops the cat up, petting her head to keep her from getting annoyed that she couldn’t continue with her curiosity. Damien laughs though and stands, now taking out the walk through Virgil so diligently wrote not 2 hours ago.

“You said that some of the plugs don’t work and that some of the switches don’t lead to anything?” He glances at Virgil with just a hint of a smirk. Virgil hugs Oogie a little tighter to keep his gay panic from spiraling.

“Yeah just seemed weird? I didn’t know if it was something wrong or what,” He says with a shrug, trying to seem nonchalant. Damien lets out a small laugh and waves Virgil to follow. He pulls out a small plug in light and pushes into one of the sockets Virgil said wasn’t working. He flicks the switch on the wall and the light pops on.

“Oh,” Virgil says and wants to die of embarrassment.

“Well now I feel stupid as fuck,” He says. Damien lets out another laugh, flicking the light twice more to demonstrate.

“It’s to save power that some of the switches lead to the plugs. Nothing broken there. You’re not stupid because you didn’t know.” He takes back his light and once more gives Virgil that sly smile. The worst is he smiles in a way that makes it seem like he knows what he’s doing to Virgil, which is just rude. Except he’s not, Damien is insanely polite which does not help Virgil in the slightest.

“Is there anything else I can help you with?” Damien asks as he puts the last of his tools back in the case.

“Nah. I’m good, thank you,” Virgil says, determined not to make a fool of himself this time. Damien nods his head.

“Have a good rest of your day then. It was a pleasure meeting you,” And this smug bastard winks at him and closes the door behind him. Virgil lets Oogie fall to the floor, picks up the nearest pillow, and screams into it. At least he can do it with proper working lights.

Virgil is freaking out. There’s no other way to put it. He is freaking out. So he got a little lazy and didn’t do his dishes. He’s been working so often and never found the energy to keep up. He decided he had a dishwasher for a reason, and even though he felt bad because the machine wasn’t even full, he ran it, and now there is water over the floor. Shit.

He sits on the couch, legs bouncing, with his phone in his hands. Thomas’s number is on the screen, ready to be dialed at the press of a button. Virgil still isn’t sure if this counts as a proper emergency. He managed to clean up most the water with some of his towels, but water is still coming out. Maybe if he just keeps rinsing out the towels and waits for the cycle to be done, he can pretend it never happened.

OogieBoogie jumps into his lap. She kneeds at his leg and is put out when he doesn’t move right away to pet her or give her proper access to his lap. She bumps her head against him and pushes her way to his chest, knocking his phone with her foot in the process.Virgil hisses at the action and ruffles her face in revenge.

“Hello?” A very faint voice calls out. Virgil swears softly and picks up his phone.

“Uh Mr Sanders Thomas?” He says into the receiver, then pulls it away to stare at the ceiling to briefly wonder what is wrong with himself.

“Yes?” Thomas says on the other line.

“It’s Virgil from Unit 16 B.”

“Virgil! How are you?” Thomas doesn’t sound put out that Virgil is calling him, which is a good sign so far. Virgil takes a deep breath, hands working methodically though Oogie’s fur.

“Doing okay yeah, how are you?” He says, it’s important to be polite. Thomas laughs.

“Doing good over here. What can I help you with?”

“Uhm, my dishwasher is leaking? And there’s water on the floor and I don’t know how to fix it. You said I could call if something is wrong and I just, yeah.” Virgil shrugs to himself. Thomas gasps on the other end.

“Oh no! That won’t do. I’ll send one of the boys over to help clean it up.” And Thomas hangs up. Virgil stares at the phone, then at his cat, then back at the dishwasher. He really doesn’t want Damien to see him embarrassed like this again. He buries his face in Oogie’s side and lets her purr calm him down. He must be there for a while because soon enough there’s a knock on the door.

Thankfully, it’s not Damien on the other end. However, it’s another incredibly attractive guy with a wild smile and even wilder hair that makes Virgil tense up because how. This one wears a shirt with the sleeves ripped off to show how ripped their arms are, and again, white jeans, though this time, the jeans are not as white as they once were, evidence of the work that has been done in them.

“Afternoodle! I’m Remus. The Sander’s Man said something was wishy-washy with your dishy-washy?” His smile in untamed and Virgil stares at him dumbly trying to understand what the hell just came out of his mouth.

“Yes?” He ends up asking more than saying, and moves over so Remus can come inside.

“Much appreciated, now what is gong on here?” Remus smirks down at the mess of the kitchen with his hands on his hips.

“I just ran the dishwasher and water started coming out. I was in the kitchen when I felt it on my foot.” Virgil explains as Remus moves some of the soaked towels over. He finagles the machine to open, something Virgil was too scared to try.

“Oh boy, I see. Give me one hot second here hot tamale, and I’ll get this all cleaned up.” Virgil isn’t sure what he should be more flustered by. Being called hot by a hot guy, or the fact the dude flexed while talking and there is some serious definition in his arms. So Virgil just nods as Remus skips out to the maintenance golf cart outside the door, and brings back in a tool box.

Virgil watches from over the counter as Remus pulls out the racks and practically crawls his way into the dishwasher. Virgil decides it’s a good time to walk away so he doesn’t end up staring at Remus’s ass while he works. That’s not proper behavior for someone who is trying to help.

It’s a few minutes, one colorful yet not quite a swear, and a victory noise later that Virgil feels okay going back to the kitchen area.

“Oh! Hello~ pusspuss!” Virgil gets to watch the exact moment Remus looks up to see Oogie staring at him working. Virgil scoops the cat up.

“Sorry she’s really into strangers.” He says. Though really, she hides from everyone. Remus lets out a cackle of a laugh.

“That’s fine, I’m into strangers too. So I fixed the problem here, no more soggy floors for you. Make sure to run it every so often so it keeps things going clean and unclogged.” Remus says far too quickly for Virgil to respond properly. He picks up his tools and returns them to the case. Virgil does a half-assed job of not staring at his back which is now water soaked.

“Is there anything else I can help you with?” Remus asks at the door. Virgil shakes his head.

“As long as it works I think I’m good,” He says. Remus smiles openly.

“Have a good rest of your day then!” He says and closes the door behind him. There was really no reason for him to flex as he said that but Virgil enjoyed it and no one else has to know.

“Shit shit shit,” Virgil is fumbling. He had to go grocery shopping and get some cat food for OogieBoogieBaby. And no self respecting trash panda such as himself would dream of carrying it back inside in more than one trip. So he’s fumbling with his arms lined with bags that would be cutting into his skin if not for his hoodie sleeves, but even then, those are falling and he wishes it wasn't so hot out.

He manages to make it to his door, shift some bags around so he can get his key out, when the bag of cat food starts slipping. Virgil can see it now, cat food all over the front porch to either collect ants, or other cats, or any other large animal. He wouldn’t feed it to Oogie, to afraid of what is on the ground and if it’ll upset her stomach. He braces for impact and for another quick trip to the store.

“Whoa!” Virgil feels the weight leave him but not the crash. He blinks at the ground, then at a pair of white jeans, then at the bag of cat food in someone else’s arms, then up to the face of a bespectacled stranger with brilliant blue eyes.

“Are you alright?” Stranger asks calmly and takes another bag from Virgil that looks ready to topple at a second’s notice. Virgil snaps out of it once it’s out of his hands.

“Shit yeah thanks,” He breathes out in a rush, thankful as all hell as he manages to finally get the door open. He pushes it with his hip and Oogie is waiting at the door for him, meowing up at him. He coos a greeting to her and sets the bags down in the kitchen, the stranger follows only to the inside door and puts the bags down there to not intrude.

“Thank you so much,” Virgil says once he’s done pretending he can carry that much. The stranger just offers him a small smile, kneeling down to let Oogie sniff his gardening glove covered hands.

“It was my pleasure to help you. My name is Logan, I’m one of the workers on site.” He says and stands. His voice is low and calming, it would make for a great audio book, and Virgil is not going to spend the rest of the day thinking about that.

“Though I do apologize for suddenly grabbing your things, I know that can come across as ‘creepy’ and I do not wish for that to be my first impression.” He pries a glove off and holds out his hand. Virgil takes it and gives it a small shake.

“I’m Virgil, and this is OogieBoogie,” He introduces himself and his cat who has deigned to jump on the counter and sniff at the contraption on Logan’s back. He gently pushes the cat away with a soft look in his eyes.

“Pleasure to meet both of you. None for you I’m afraid,” He chides Oogie gently. Virgil swallows because damn, someone interacting gently with his cat more of a heart throb than originally intended. And Logan is nothing if not simply scholarly stunning.

“My apologies again, be sure to let someone know if there’s anything we can help you with. Have a wonderful rest of your day,” Logan nods his head softly and there is just the smallest crinkle around his eyes hidden under his glasses and Virgil is so weak as he closes the door to his apartment. He’s come into contact with one too many pretty people at this complex and it will be the death of him. Still, it is nice to wave to Logan every so often as he preens the landscaping around the buildings.

Virgil watches as water drips down the window. It started the other day after some rains. He put a towel under it to keep some of the water from ruining anything, but it’s still going the next day. Virgil sighs and looks at his phone, Thomas’s number on the screen. He takes a deep breath and presses call.

“Hello?” Thomas answers.

“Hey Mr. Thomas it’s Virgil, from Unit 16 B.” A practiced line. Thomas gives a happy gasp.

“Virgil how are you?” Thomas always sounds excited to speak to him. It helps.

“Doing okay, how are you?” He asks, absently petting Oogie’s back.

“Good good! How can I help you?” Thomas asks in turn. Virgil looks at the window.

“Something’s up with my window? It’s like.. leaking.” He explains but not really. Thomas hums.

“Did this start up with the rain?”

“Yeah, I’ve tried cleaning it with towels but it keeps going.” Virgil says. Thomas makes another hum noise.

“Sounds like a problem with the roof. I’ll send one of the boys over.” And Thomas hangs up. Virgil isn’t as put off with the abrupt ending, expecting it this time around. He glares at the window and goes to wait for ‘one of the boys’. Oogie follows over and demands pets. It a decent distraction till a loud knock comes from the door.

Virgil opens it and it's just unbelievable how down right beautiful this guy is. His hair in perfect waves and a charming smile on his face. His sleeves are also cut like Remus's were, but far less frayed.

"Wonderful morning, my name is Roman. Our dear Mr. Sanders told me there were some ill issues with the roof is that right?" He speaks with such confident flamboyance Virgil is a loss for words.

"Yeah," Is all he manages to say. He's pretty. Way too pretty for this.

"Yeah, sorry it's over here," He turns and leaves the door open for Roman to follow. Roman laughs loud and proud and does just that. Virgil shows him the window and does not bit his lip as Roman jostles the frame showing off muscles that are illegal.

"The panes seems closed but I'll check outside as well." He turns and heads out the door. Virgil follows.

"And the roof?" He asks. Roman offers him a dashing smile, checking his tools that he attaches to his belt, holding up pristine white jeans.

"You may hear some noises for a while as I'm up there, but fear not, I'll find the problem." He gives Virgil a wink and with ease, he finds a ledge on the building and hoists himself up. Virgil does not squeak. Certainly not cause he's scared that Roman will fall, and certainly not cause he rolls his shoulders and Virgil can see his body move and god damn it he’s so not straight.

So he goes inside and pretends there’s not a real attractive guy fixing his roof. The noises of fixing continue for an hour or so, Virgil keeping busy with cleaning and some mild work emails. Then the noises stop. Virgil glances at his ceiling curiously.

"Uh, Roman?" He calls from his front door, making sure the dude didn't fall off and die.

"Be down in a moment fair tenant!" He hears. Virgil rolls his eyes and barely turns when Roman suddenly lands in front of him.

"Roof is all set. There were a few shingles out of-"

"Did you just jump off the roof?!" Virgil interrupts. Roman blinks at him and has the nerve to smiling so dashingly again.

"I dare say I did," he says as if it's no big deal. Virgil sputters at the reckless, careless, brash attitude. Roman is far too entertained by it.

"I'm honored by the concern, dearest. Just one more moment to check the window from the other side." He winks again and is walking around the building before Virgil can say anything.

He grabs Oogie and plants his face in her fur. Too gay to function. He talks to her plainly about how unfair it is that pretty boys plague his life, only to find out he can absolutely be heard through the window by Roman asking in a muffled voice.

"You think I'm pretty?" Virgil screams and hides in his room, hearing Roman laugh through the wall. This is how he dies, he decides. This is even worse than the time Damien had to tell him his lights weren’t broken, he just didn’t know how to use them. This is so much worse.

He groans loud and dramatically when there’s a knock on his front door. He doesn’t want to open it. But he does, cause it’s rude other wise.Roman stands there, smug expression and a bright smile.

“Checked everything and cleaned up some water. A few shingles out of place and a loose vent, got those all patched down. If it continues to leak it might be a bigger issue so be sure to call if it does. Anything else I can help you with?” He asks. Virgil takes a steady breath to say no.

“I think I’ve dug my own grave enough for today,” He says, further digging his own embarrassment grave. Roman gives another laugh.

“Enchanted to meet you pretty boy, have an amazing rest of your day.” And then Roman honest to goodness bows and drives off in the golf cart. Virgil closes his door softly and looks at Oogie who stares back from her perch on the counter.

“Don’t even start,” He tells the cat. She looks away like she doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

“Boogs! No!” Virgil does not like shouting at his cat. He doesn’t like shouting in general. But it gets OogieBoogieBitchBaby away from the wall she is using as a scratching post. She scampers off as he approaches, fingers going over the claw marks in the wall. He groans to himself.

He moved her cat tower because she kept getting onto his work papers. In revenge for disposing her from her favorite perch and sights of the room, she clawed at the wall instead, leaving a few nasty scratches behind.

“How am I supposed to fix this?” He asks where she’s run off, hearing her run around. He bangs his head on the wall. This is not how he wanted his night to go. In the end, he has Thomas’s number on his phone and piece of paper he tore to shreds in worry over what he could possibly say.

“Hello?” Thomas answers.

“Hey Mr. Sanders, it’s Virgil. I-”

“Virgil! How are you?” Thomas asks. Virgil takes a deep breath.

“I’m- I’m so sorry Mr. Sanders. It was an accident I swear.” He needs to apologize, cause if Mr. Sanders kicks him out, he’ll have to go hunting for places to live again, and who is going to take him with a cat who destroys things, and then because no one will take him, he’ll die on the streets and Oogie will eat his toes.

“My cat Oogie she got upset with me and she clawed the wall and I’m so sorry,” He says in a rush.

“Hey, hey Virgil it’s okay. It happens, our furry friends do funny things. I’ll send one of the boys over to help fix it right up, okay?” Virgil swallows a lump in his throat at Thomas’s easy solution.

“Okay,” He croaks out and then hears the click of someone hanging up. He lets his phone drop and then puts his head in his hands. He doesn’t want to be kicked out his apartment, or to have Mr. Sanders think bad of him as a tenant, or as a bad pet owner. He throws himself back on his couch. He feels so dumb.

Thankfully, there’s a gentle knock to his door. Hopefully his savior in this mess. He opens it to bubbly boy in round glasses, giving him the most cheerful smile Virgil’s ever seen.

“Hey there, evening to you, my name is Patton. Mr. Sanders said we have some kitty claws on the walls?” He asks. Virgil lets his shoulders drop.

“Yeah, I’m so sorry about it.” He says Patton waves his hand.

“It’s not a cat-astrophe, it happens. Can you show me where it is?” He asks. Virgil nods and steps back to let the boy in white jeans in, then pauses.

“Did you just make a pun?” He deadpans. And Patton giggles.

“Sorry, sorry, just slipped out. I’m pawfully bad at them.” He says with a bright smile. Virgil stares at him, then snorts into his hand.

“That was really bad,” He says but Patton just beams at him.

“Got you to laugh though.” And Patton should not sound so proud of making a stranger laugh. Virgil coughs to cover his awkward and shows him where Oogie got to the wall and Patton ‘tuts’ in response, putting down a bag of tools on the floor.

“I have just the thing to get this back in purr-fect conditions.” Patton opens his bag and pulls out some paint and calking. Virgil steps back to let him do his job, very aware that Oogie is hiding somewhere away from him. It makes him nervous to not see his cat in the area. Sure Oogie isn’t a registered therapy animal, but she does a good job of keeping him calm.

“There, al-meow-st done!” Patton smiles at him over his shoulder and adds another coat of paint to the wall, looking good as new. Maybe it’s the puns or the cute, but Virgil does relax.

“Thanks for that.” Virgil says as Patton cleans up. He giggles once more and waves Virgil’s concern off again.

“It’s no big deal, it’s what we’re here for.” He reassures. Virgil sighs and turns to the small meow behind him. Oogie is on the table staring at him. Patton lets out a squeal of happiness.

“Oh she’s precious!” He says in syrupy sweet voice. Virgil snorts again and looks between the two.

“Wanna pet her?” He asks and before he finishes Patton is shaking his head.

“Un-fur-tunately I’m allergic. But she is paws-itively adorable.” Patton coos and waves to the cat, Oogie does nothing in return but that’s to be expected. Virgil rolls his eyes at the both of them.

“Thanks again for your help,” He says. Patton beams and there are freckles on his cheeks. Freckles, too cute, not allowed.

“Of course! Anything else I can help you with?” He asks. Virgil’s turn to shake his head.

“I think we’re good now,” He says. Patton giggles once more.

“Have a claw-some rest of your night,” And that shouldn’t be funny but Virgil snorts again and Patton is proudly walking off.

What the fuck, what the fuck. Virgil stares at the door knob in his hand. He just went for a late walk to get his mail, Oogie joining him on his shoulders. Something rattled in the door knob when he opened it, having to actually shove the door open to get back inside after unlocking it. When he went to close the door, the handle came off in his hand before he could close it proper.

What the fuck.

He stares at the space where the door knob was and his open door. His mind immediately races to all the creepy people who can break in and steal things or kidnap his cat. Or even all the bugs that will make home in his food and hair. Nope. None of that.

“Hey Mr Sanders?” Virgil says first, his anxiety over the open door he can not close for fear it won’t open again overriding his normal fear of calling his land lord.

“Virgil! How are you? It’s very late,” Thomas yawns on the other end. Virgil winces. He probably should have thought this through considering the time.

“I’m okay, so sorry to wake you, it’s just. My door handle uh, fell off?” There’s a pause.

“Well that’s not good.” Thomas says.

“I’ll send one of the boys over.” He hangs up plainly. Virgil has enough time to worry if he made Thomas upset by calling so late, and worry Oogie somehow got out only to find her cuddled in her tower, when the bad lights from the maintenance golf cart shine through the crack in the door.

There’s an awkward knock and Virgil pulls the door open. He’s not sure who in their right mind has sunglasses on this late, but at least this gorgeous person isn’t using them to hide their bright eyes. They give him a quirky smile.

“Well this isn’t something you see every day.” They remark and Virgil has to huff out a laugh, some of his panic subsiding.

“Evening babes, I’m Remy. What happened?” He asks and goes about unscrewing the rest of the door knob, kneeling down and scuffing his white jeans that nearly glow in the darkness. Virgil tells him the lead up and Remy scoffs out a laugh of their own, giving Virgil a glance, that turns into a once over, that shakes him to the core.

“No worries, I can see the broken piece. Easy fix.” He winks at Virgil and gets a spare doorknob from the golf cart. Virgil stand idly by as he fixes it, keeping Oogie from getting too close.

“Wassup cat?” Remy asks and gently puts his knuckles to her head in greeting. She makes a noise and then trots off, satisfied with the attention.

“What’s their name?” Remy asks while he screws things back together.

“That OogieBoogie, Oogie for short, though she’s been more of an OogieBoogieBastard lately.” She meows at Virgil from the top of her tower. He hisses back at her. Remy snorts.

“Nice, I have an orange cat named Pumpkin.”

“Nice,” Virgil says back. Remy smirks at his response and keeps working. Vigil pretends the look on Remy’s face didn’t give him reckless night vibes, that he would take Remy up on if he asked, cause damn, the dude’s hot.

“May I borrow your key for a second babes?” Remy twists the knob a few times and with Virgil’s borrowed key, closes, locks, and opens the door with no problems.

“All good to go, anything else I can help you with?” He asks as he hands back the key. Virgil shakes his head.

“Nah, I’m good, thanks for that,” He says. Remy gives him a wink.

“Have a good night babes.” Another wicked smirk and Virgil does his best to close his door at a proper speed. His heart is pounding and these pretty boys will be the end of him.

“Hi! Welcome in, how can I help you?” Cute, is all Virgil can think when he enters the office. Pastel, is second. There’s a new receptionist at the desk, freckles and a mega-watt smile.

“Hi uh, I got a notification I have a package?” He stammers out. Oogie purrs at his shoulder, reminding him it’s okay.

“Sure! What apartment number?” Virgil rattles off his numbers as the receptionist looks in the package closet.

“For Virgil?” They ask. He nods and takes his box, keeping it away from Oogie as it’s a surprise for her birthday.

“Oh! I’m Emile by the way. I’m working in the office now so if you need anything just give us a call okay?” They’re so earnest. Virgil ends up just nodding his head, only speaking when Oogie bumps her head to his.

“Yeah, thanks,” He says and before he can make an exit Thomas appears from inside one of the offices.

“I thought I head you! Virgil, how are you?” He asks. Virgil gives him a soft smile.

“Good, and you?” It’s only polite. Thomas lets out a laugh.

“Good here too. Say, the staff is hosting a tenant party here, some games and some food, you should join us if you’re not busy.” Thomas hands Virgil a flyer with some gaudy colors. Virgil does a good job of not letting his dislike of the idea show.

“You should totally come!” Emile beams at him and it does something gay to Virgil’s heart. Virgil glances at the two of them smiling at him.

“I could stop by?” He offers not waiting to make them mad at him. They cheer and turn back to their jobs. Virgil walks back to his apartment, petting Oogie as he does.

“What did I just get myself into?” He asks her. She bumps her head to his hand in response.

It’s not a bad turnout for an apartment complex party. Virgil does show up, Oogie situated on his shoulders. Even though its closer to summer, He’s still wearing his hoodie if not just to give her a place to put her paws should she wish to.

There’s those plastic cheap tables lining around the pool area, boxes of pizza and some crinkly plastic containers of mini sub sandwiches sit on top. There’s a section for drinks and cups right next to. Virgil gets himself a cup of lemonade.

He glances about. Some people are playing some bean bag toss game, others are playing on the mini putt putt area Virgil didn’t even know they had. Lots of people are in the pool, messing around and splashing water at each other. He sticks to the sidelines.

“Virgil!” Or maybe not. He looks to who called his name and though he’s happy Logan called for him so he doesn’t have to be alone, he’s lamenting the fact that not only is it Logan, he’s also with Patton, Damien, and Remy. Fuck. Virgil goes bug eyed, giving himself a pep talk, helped along by Oogie making a ‘mrrp’ noise in his ear, and walks to his doom.

“Hey Logan,” Virgil says once he’s close. Patton waves as best he can with hands full of pizza.

“Sup babes?” Remy asks with damn smirk, sunglasses appropriate now. Virgil rolls his eyes.

“Damien, if you don’t remember,” Damien holds out his hand. Virgil of course remembers embarrassing himself in front of freaking sleek attractive Damien, but he isn't about to say that. Virgil takes his hand to shake and Damien flips it to bring a kiss to the back of Virgil’s hand. Virgil’s jaw drops as Patton giggles helplessly.

“Dee don’t do that!” He says but there’s not force behind it. Damien just smiles like the cat that got the cream.

“I didn’t know you two were familiar?” Damien turns the attention to Logan now. Logan just pushes up his glasses.

“I admit to helping Virgil carry in groceries more than once.” Logan says, giving Damien a look that Virgil doesn’t have the power to decipher. Patton whines.

“Kiddo you could have asked for more help,” He says. Virgil shrugs.

“Two trips are for the weak.” He and Remy tap their glasses together in a cheers.

“Yes and I’m sure dropping your groceries is also for the weak.” Logan chides and it does hit a little harder, but still Virgil taps his glass to Remy’s again in a cheers.

“Virgil!” Someone calls and Virgil is blinded by the force of Emile’s smile so suddenly in his face.

“You came!” He’s excited. Virgil nods and takes a step back. Oogie murmurs upset on his shoulder.

“Yep, I said I would and hey, free food.” He ignores the looks the others give each other and Emile just bounces.

“Well I’m glad you’re here. Me and Patton were gunna play corn-hole later, you should join us!” Patton gives an equally excited gasp as Emile gestures to the bean bag toss.

“Uh sure,” Virgil says. Emile bounces and waves, and is off to say hi to other residents as soon as he came. Virgil is reeling from the interaction and it only gets worse.

“Is that pretty boy??” Virgil hears the splash before he sees anyone but then Remus is there in his face, shirtless and in swim trunks and dear god, he has a tramp stamp.

“Hello again stranger~” He coos. Virgil musters up a hi when suddenly another shirtless person is standing next to Remus.

“It is pretty boy! How are you darling?” Roman says. Virgil has officially hit gay panic mode. If the earlier mix of suave and cute wasn’t enough to do him in, the pure amount of muscle now is going to do him in.

“Fine,” He chokes out. Remus and Roman both laugh at his answer. Great. If he hoped for any kind of saving from the others, it’s surely a dashed hope by the amused looks on their faces.

“Are you joining us in the pool?” Remus asks excited. Oogie hisses from his shoulders. Vigil raises a hand to calm her and she nuzzles his knuckles.

“Uh not today.” He says, which is the wrong thing to say.

“But another day?” Remus asks all wild excited. Roman shoves him.

“Like he wants to spend time with your gross ass!” Roman shouts playfully. Patton huffs and calls him for his language but he is ignored. Remus gasps offended with a wild smirk on his face.

“Sure he does, can’t keep his eyes off these guns,” And Remus flexes. Virgil smacks a hand to his face. Oogie dips to hide in his hood. Roman lets out a laugh and firmly shoves Remus back into the pool.

“The only gun he needs is a glock to the face.” Roman puts a fist in his hand, flexing as well. The pun does get Patton to giggle though and Damien rolls his eyes.

“Virgil I am going to get some food, would you like to accompany me?” Logan asks finally done with the nonsense.

“How do you know his name!?” Roman screeches.

“I asked.” Roman let's out an outright offended gasp for whatever reason. He doesn’t get to say another word as Remus from out of no where, runs and tackles Roman back into the pool with no such boundaries.

“Food sounds good,” Virgil says. Logan smiles softly at him.

“I think I shall join you,” Damien says looking into his cup which doesn’t look empty but who is Virgil to judge.

“Come find me and Emile when you’re done okay?” Patton interjects before they can leave. Virgil offers him a two finger salute, and then leaves Patton and Remy to go find Emile, while he finds food.

“Idiots,” Logan mutters once they are away from the pool. Damien hums in thought.

“But not wrong,” He says.

“They aren’t right either.” Logan snaps back.

“Should I go?” Virgil asks as they are clearly not talking to him. Both Damien and Logan look at him scandalized.

“Certainly not!” Damien says and gives him a slick smile. Virgil swallows down his lemonade to keep his throat from clogging up. He spends some time talking to the two of them, making sarcastic comments and opening up. Oogie pops out to lick his hair at one point.

At that, Virgil finds Emile somewhere, letting them know he’ll be right back, wanting to drop Oogie off at home. He’s comfortable enough here to not need her reassurances, besides, she’s tired from napping and needs to go home to sleep. With some ‘hurry back’ wishes, he’s off back to his place.

He makes sure Oogie is comfy and goes to leave, finding Thomas waiting in one of the golf carts outside his door.

“Need a ride?” He offers. Virgil laughs and joins him in the small vehicle.

“Virgil if I may, I have a favor to ask of you?” Thomas says seriously. Virgil nods his head as his lungs refuse to let him breathe for fear of the favor.

“Please be kind to my grand kids yeah?” Thomas asks, an earnest look in his eyes. Virgil isn’t sure what he’s talking about, but then he looks up. All of the boys who have been coming in and out of his life to fix his home are there staring and waiting for him to get back with the same look in their eyes.

Oh. Virgil thinks.

Oh no.

AN: Lol that multiship life

Edit: now with a part 2

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doomstypewriter · 3 years

Text

Excuse me while I panic

Hi, I'm back from finals, but my brain is kind of dead right now, so enjoy this silly two-shot in the meantime.

Word count: 996 | AO3

Summary: Roman needs to get on with the program, realise his crush on Virgil and ask him out, because it's getting ridiculous.

At least Janus thinks so. Everybody does.

A wild crush has appeared, except it was there all along, Roman is just dumb <3

“It’d be a pity if you got over yourself and told Virgil you loved him already. Not that I care about his happiness or anything”.

Roman turned to face the back of the room, where Janus was sitting with a lap full of Patton, who just shrugged in agreement with a quizzical smile.

The treacherous acceptance Patton showed after Janus’ out-of-the-blue comment almost made Roman gasp.

“I just said I want to hang out with him this week”.

“And marry him the month after that, I suppose” Janus retorted.

“Okay, first of all, nah-uh, and second of all, I’d have expected this outright attack for you, but, Patton, are you going to stand watching him bullying me?!”

Just when he was about to reply, Janus intervened again, pretending to be distracted playing with Patton’s curls.

“Not quite, let me rephrase that for you: bullying you into getting ahead in life”.

“Hello?” Roman gestured at himself, only to feel even more increpated by Janus’ glancing at him up and down. “I’m dashing at all times, it’s you who should be putting in the effort”.

As per usual, Janus smirked, unimpressed. He ran a finger, scratching lightly, up Patton’s neck. Underneath the cardigan, a pair of shoulders rolled in a contained shudder.

“I already have. You, though, have achieved nothing. Also, why am I detecting” Janus said, raising a hand to cup behind his ear, “a hint of defensiveness? Honestly… well… as honestly as the budget allows, I am saying this for your sake. Take notes or something, Roman”.

Roman’s weight shifted from one leg to the other, he crossed his arms and gasped, for real this time.

“Excuse me?”

“Excused. I’ll dictate it for you: number one, dot, Janus has made me realise my lack of ambition, comma, I will ask Virgil out”. Janus changed the tone for a second, considering. “Hmmm… let’s say, at once, sounds very you, doesn’t it? Blah, blah, no ambition, I’m very dim, I will ask Virgil out at once, full stop. New paragraph: number two, dot, from now on, comma, I shall listen to Janus’ advice, comma, because he’s so right all the time, full stop”.

Once Roman came out of his astonishment, he closed his gaping mouth and pursed his lips like a child.

“Okay, that’s it, you did this. I’m calling the nerd”.

Janus had no time to complain, as Logan was summoned immediately thereafter.

“Lo, are you okay?!” Patton stirred in place after seeing Logan’s looks.

There, in all bizarre glory, stood Logan, draped in a lab coat with some unidentified stains, knee-length black rubber boots, safety glasses with what dangerously looked like a speckle of blood and a pair of gloves holding a scalpel.

“Don’t worry Patton, he’s just been playing with Remus” Janus offered.

Logan examined the room quickly, then cleared up his throat and blinked himself into his usual attire.

“I was in the middle of something”.

“Clearly” Roman muttered sarcastically.

“What do you need?” Logan made a point to ignore Roman’s comment.

Janus smiled calmly.

“Roman just called you so you can prove him wrong”.

Before the prince could retort, Logan nodded with a vague hint of amusement.

“Well, I can certainly do that”.

“You won’t need to, because it’s him who’s saying” Roman paused and endeavoured to make his best impression of Logan, “falsehoods”.

Logan frowned and crossed his arms.

“That is to be expected, so what is the context?”

“He says I need to ask Virgil out because he’s always right”.

Roman went on saying something along the lines of ‘like, I like Virgil, but not like that. And he’s just implying I’m in love with him, and I would know because, hi, Roman, romance? And Patton isn’t even defending me!’. All of that, Logan didn’t listen to, deciding to speak plainly.

“That’s incorrect, Janus gets things wrong often, it is, in fact, a statistical improbability to be right all the time. But, to be fair, out of all of you, he holds a higher average”.

“Exactly, that’s what I said” Roman shook his hand forward as if to underline how justified he felt. A moment later he went quiet. “Wait…”

“No need. I’ll finish dispatching this soon. So, no, Janus is not always right, but you would do well to heed to his advice on this occasion, seeing how it would help resolve your feelings for Virgil”.

“What?”

“Thank you, Logan” Janus said.

Logan nodded, satisfied with a good job.

“No need, happy to help”.

“Wait, wait, wait!” Roman exclaimed. “I have no feelings for Virgil…” he reconsidered, “not like that!”

In a quick save, Logan hid his laugh with a frown and an inhale.

“Excellent example of being wrong, you’ll be a great help to Logan’s statistics” Janus grinned.

Everybody was looking at him.

Normally, he’d like that, because it was the natural order of things. At the present time, though, he felt paralysed by a sudden onslaught of contradicting feelings and thoughts. Unfortunately, all of these things running through his mind popped in and out too fast for him to process them as more than a jumble of nonsense.

That is to say, he drew a complete blank, cursing his ADHD.

“But-but… I’m not in” he started slowly, trying to organise his ideas.

Then, went down with the first thing to come out of his mouth because working under pressure is not his thing.

“Like, I spend a ton of time with him, but what do you know? And, honestly, you’re just jealous Virge pays more attention to me because he’s almost as great as me. By the way, Janus steals your crofters when you don’t look, someone has to say it, because we’re outing people’s secrets, except not mine’s ‘cause I’m not in love with…”

Patton stood up, knowing he’d have to help everyone brace themselves.

All at the same time, the following was spoken or shouted:

“Snitch!”

“He did what?!”

“Oh my... I’m in love with Virgil”

Next>>

Thx for reading. Reblog or comment if it made you laugh <3

Taglist: COME AT ME BRO, COME AT ME, write a comment and tell me to tag you for the next chapter, I DARE YOU /nm /lh /j

#prinxiety #romantic prinxiety #background moceit #ts roman #prinxiety fic #sanders sides #sanders sides fic #prinxiety fluff #humor #in this house we stan janus sanders #ts janus #ts patton #ts logan #roman has adhd #doomstypewriter #doomywrites

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dukeofonions · 3 years

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The Problem With Asides

Before I get into anything I want to clarify that this is not going to be a criticism of the two Asides episodes we’ve gotten so far. This is a critique of the concept of Sanders Asides as a separate series from the original Sanders Sides. A second note I want to make is that this is, just as all my other posts are, a personal opinion. This is not meant to be an attack on anyone, just a general criticism from a confused writer and viewer of the show.

And final disclaimer: A lot of what I’m going to say is based on information that I no longer have available. It’ll mostly be me recalling things I heard and if I at any point get something wrong please feel free to let me know.

That being said, let’s get into this, shall we?

(Fair warning this post is very long hence why I’ve divided it into parts so feel free to read then come back as you wish)

Part One: The Concept of Asides

Some time ago last year, I believe shortly after Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts came out, was when the idea for Sanders Asides was first announced. The basic concept of it being shorter, more lighthearted videos focusing on the Sides outside of the main storyline. This format would allow them to give us more Sides content in between the long waits for the main series since those episodes were beginning to take more time to produce.

Of course, everyone was eager for more Sides, so the majority of people were excited. Not only that but due to the main series tackling heavier themes, the episodes were becoming more angsty with less time for the characters to just relax and goof off with each other. The idea of having episodes reminiscent of the low stakes, sillier, happier content of season one was a welcome break from the more complex episodes and would be a nice return to form for the series.

We were also informed that these episodes would be much simpler than their main series counterparts and wouldn’t disrupt the work being done on Sanders Sides, which meant we didn’t have to worry about long gaps between the main story episodes, right?

(Another disclaimer: I am perfectly aware of the main reason why we were not given as much content last year and am not blaming Thomas or the team for doing what was necessary to keep themselves safe and hope they continue to do so as this continues into the new year)

Jump to November 22, 2019, where we got our first official episode of Sanders Asides, roughly five months after DWIT came out. Which, for this fandom, was record time to get more content and I was pleasantly surprised by how quickly they were able to get this out. Though at the same time, I wondered why it took five months to make what was meant to be a short, simple episode.

So imagine my surprise when I went to watch the episode and saw it was nearly 20 minutes long. Which, okay, isn’t that bad when you compare it to the lengths of the more recent Sanders Sides episodes. But at the time, I was under the impression that the Asides would be, well, much shorter. The longest I expected would be maybe 15 minutes, but you know what? It’s the first episode and it has been a while since we’ve had Sides content, so maybe they wanted to give us a little extra due to the long wait.

I started the episode and at first, I was overjoyed when I saw the first shot of all the Sides sitting in the living room in their onesies about to have a movie night. This was exactly what I’d been hoping to see from this series! It’s pretty much a staple thing in the fandom for the Sides to have movie nights together, and now it was happening in canon!

At the moment, I had high hopes for this series and was filled with joy.

Then that hope and joy were immediately crushed when I realized this was yet just another Virgil-centric angst episode. In fact, this entire episode was, well, exactly like a regular Sanders Sides episode. Sure, there were some jokes here and there, but the tone of the episode was no lighter than the last Sanders Sides episode. If anything DWIT felt lighter in comparison to this one.

Which leads me to ask, what the heck happened?

Part Two: Literally the Same Show

At this point in time, we’ve only had two episodes of Asides. Usually, I try to hold off my judgment of a series until I’ve had at least one other episode to see if my original criticisms still stand.

To be fair, I did think Flirting With Social Anxiety was a step in the right direction. More comedy, a lighter tone, yes. Perfect. But again, just like with Are There Healthy Distractions? This episode quickly dove right back into the angst pool, and just like ATHD it was a pretty long episode, clocking in at almost 25 minutes.

Not only that but again, both FWSA and ATHD don’t feel any different from the episodes we’ve been getting in Sanders Sides.

1. They’re just as angsty.

2. Roughly the same length as Sanders Sides episodes.

3. Take about just as long to produce.

4. Contain a lesson to be learned.

Which, okay, you can have lessons in lighter shows too, but we’re already getting that in Sanders Sides and Sanders Asides was described as, well, being less plot heavy. Yet so far both episodes are still tied in with the main plot.

ATHD deals with the aftermath of DWIT, not directly but it’s pretty obvious that the whole thing with Virgil’s reveal at the end of that episode is being addressed in the background. Which, kind of takes away the impact of that ending, but I’ll get to that later.

Then FWSA takes place after Putting Others First and again, is dealing with things from that episode in the background. Again though, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It makes sense to see the characters dealing with things from past events.

So why is it a problem here? Because, again, Sanders Asides is meant to be a separate series, and all the subtext brought on from the episodes in Sanders Sides makes the plots in these two episodes confusing.

For example, I was perplexed during my first watch of FWSA because I couldn’t understand why the focus of the conflict was lying. I didn’t understand why Virgil and Roman came to the conclusion that Thomas’ reason for being unable to approach Nico was because he was lying to himself, when both the title of the episode and what we were shown points more to, well, social anxiety being the problem.

(Quick note: One could argue that this was done purposefully to have Virgil putting the blame on Janus since he doesn’t like him and wouldn’t want to admit that he was the one responsible, but this series has had a bad habit of favoring Virgil in the past so until we get more answers I’m gonna leave this on the backburner)

It didn’t help that I had no idea when this episode was meant to take place in the timeline, and I originally thought it could take place a bit after season two since Roman and Virgil seemed to be doing better, but more on them later.

All of this bugged me until I found out that FWSA takes place after POF, and after watching the live stream that followed and getting some more context, the lying thing made a bit more sense, but the fact that I was as confused as I was just caused more frustration to build up. And I wasn’t the only one who got thrown off by the “Lying is wrong” message of FWSA so I had to ask again, why was this episode a Sanders Asides when apparently, you need information from the last Sanders Sides episode in order to understand it?

So you’re telling me, that the second episode in what is supposed to be a separate series that isn’t meant to be a part of the main plot, is now integral to the plot of the main story you’re telling in what is, as you have said, a separate show? How does that make any sense?

Okay, one could argue that Thomas getting a love interest doesn’t really fit with the current storyline that’s going on in Sanders Sides, and that is a fair point. The problem with that is, FWSA takes place right after Putting Others First.

You all remember what happened at the end of that episode, right?

Part Three: Intrusive Plots

At this point we’ve all become rather accustomed to the long waits in between videos, it’s nothing new to us, and for the most part they haven’t done anything to harm the current plot of Sanders Sides. Sure, the length of time between videos can cause people to lose interest, but for the most part the tone of the last three episodes of Sanders Sides hasn’t differed much and the story flow is still going along smoothly.

Let’s start with Selfishness vs Selflessness, which is the episode that sets up the big climax for season two. It’s still got its jokes and funny moments, but the overall tone is far more serious than previous episodes have been. This carries on into DWIT where Thomas has been so stressed out lately that he’s begun to have trouble with his intrusive thoughts.

Virgil even gives a pretty good summary of Thomas’ current mental state: “He recently realized he’s a bigger liar than he thought he was, he doesn’t understand himself, he’s committed to skipping a big callback, and he’s sleep-deprived. So yeah, he feels like a piece of dirt who has no control over his life.”

And all that was a direct result of the ending of SVS, despite DWIT not being the direct follow up to that episode the two are still intertwined. Remember that for later.

DWIT ends with the long awaited reveal of Virgil having been a “Dark Side.” Even though the majority of the fandom had figured it out by as early as Can Lying Be Good? That didn’t take away from the emotional gut punch that this scene was and it’s one of my favorite moments from the series. I may have to make a whole post breaking that scene down but what matters is that this scene was a turning point for Virgil’s character.

We’ve seen him trying to hide the truth from Thomas ever since Janus and Remus started popping up, and there were close calls with both of them nearly revealing it themselves and continuously dropping hints to Thomas. Only for Virgil to admit it to Thomas himself, and leave before Thomas can even say a word.

We don’t know for sure how Thomas is feeling in this moment, but it’s clear he’s been shaken by this. He doesn’t really have a lot of time to process it before he remembers to acknowledge the audience and close out the video.

This comes up again once we finally get to the monster of an episode that is POF, the follow up to SVS that everyone had been waiting over a year for. Right away we see that Patton and Roman will be at the forefront of this discussion with Logan popping up every now and then, but who doesn’t show up in this episode despite having played a role in SVS?

Virgil.

He’s nowhere to be seen and his absence is definitely felt. Why wouldn’t he be part of this discussion? He was there in SVS and had a lot to say on the matter, he was even part of the decision to choose the wedding over the callback! So why wasn’t he there?

Well, just look at the ending of DWIT and there’s your answer. Of course he isn’t about to show his face after that. Not when Thomas is already under so much stress already and he isn’t sure how Thomas will react to seeing him-

*insert random voice whispering off to the side*

Wait, Virgil has seen Thomas since DWIT? When?

*whispers continue*

Oh, right, they interacted in Sanders Asides. How did that go again?

*whispers explain*

Huh? Thomas said he’s cool with Virgil despite revealing that he’s been hiding something from him this whole time? That “something” being the fact that Virgil was once considered part of the others that were currently making Thomas’ life miserable?

*whispers confirm*

Really? They’re both okay with each other now? Well, good for them.

So wait, then why didn’t Virgil show up in POF? He was there during the first discussion and honestly he’d have more of a reason to show up than Logan who wasn’t really present at all in SVS.

*whispers explain*

He just wasn’t need there? Hm, alright. Guess that makes sense…

Well okay, Virgil and Thomas are on good terms once POF rolls around, Virgil isn’t present during the conversation because he isn’t needed and I suppose his presence would make things worse. Especially once Janus revealed himself, he wouldn’t allow him to get a word in. Even though Janus could probably silence him but I digress.

Fast forward towards the ending of POF, remember when I said to remember how SVS and DWIT were connected? Well DWIT is just as important to POF, acting as a bit of bridge between to the two episodes.

Janus brings up Remus (both directly and indirectly) twice in this episode.

First here:

Notice how Roman’s breakdown is already being foreshadowed here, the camera focusing on him while “Logan” says this isn’t an accident.

The second time Remus is brought up is at the very end after Janus has revealed his name:

“Oh, Roman thank God you don’t have a mustache. Otherwise between you and Remus, I wouldn’t know who the evil twin is.”

(No I am not posting screenshots of this scene I already got emotional over the last one)

As we saw at the end of DWIT, Roman does not have a good relationship with is brother. So much so that when Thomas refers to Remus as such, Roman creates a different analogy that compares Remus to a mirror, reflecting everything Roman doesn’t want to be.

Roman desperately wants to distance himself from Remus, not wanting anything to do with him. We’ve only gotten a glimpse of just how far this loathing goes, and part of that comes from Roman finally breaking down after being told by Janus that if it wasn’t for a mustache there’d be no difference between him and Remus.

This shook Roman more than anything else in the show has so far, moreso than him being the one to decide that Thomas should give up the callback. He was the one that pushed Thomas to make that decision, believing it was the noble thing to do, only for it to only make Thomas feel worse and then be told by Janus that his “noble sacrifice” was all for nothing.

Janus, the one who had been supporting Roman throughout SVS, buttering him up and encouraging him to go after his dream, told him that his sacrifice was worthless. Then to top it all off Janus admits what he did and brushes it off as a joke. He doesn’t apologize to Roman, leaving him in the dust, then when Roman responds by laughing at his name he’s shot down even lower.

And when he looks to Thomas and Patton for help, for answers, anything.

They stay silent.

Patton tries to reassure him, telling Roman that they love him, but he doesn’t believe it. He sinks out, and that’s the last we see of him.

Selfishness vs Selflessness, Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts, and Putting Others First are three of the biggest (and dare I say most important) episodes in the series. The three almost act like a trilogy, with POF leading to something bigger, the season finale. Which will be culmination of all three of these episodes.

We’ll be seeing Virgil’s reaction to Janus having been accepted by Patton and facing his own past as a “Dark Side.” Then we’ll find out what has become of Roman after he disappeared at the end of POF, and how it now affects his relationship with Thomas.

*whispers return and begin to whisper*

I’m sorry what?

*whispers repeat*

Virgil already knows about Janus getting somewhat accepted? Well okay I guess he would, wish we could have seen his reaction to that but oh well, no big deal. At least we got the Roman and Thomas confrontation to look forward to.

*whispers whisper*

Roman has already interacted with Thomas since POF? When?!

*whisper*

In FWSA? Oh yeah, how did that go again? It was super awkward right? Since Roman doesn’t really trust that Thomas loves or values him?

*whisperly whisper*

They get along just fine as if nothing happened?

*whispersty*

It looks like he might still be upset with him since he’s being a bit passive aggressive?

*whisper*

Can’t really tell because the three are too busy trying to talk to a cute guy at the mall?

Okay, I guess that all makes sense…

Looks like Roman and Virgil still aren��t on the best terms with Thomas but are able to push that aside to help him talk to this handsome stranger, and hey, it worked! Thomas now has a boyfriend! Just look at Roman and Virgil at the end, they’re both so happy with Thomas!

Looks like now they can focus on this new chapter in their life and leave the events of POF behind them. I mean, now that Roman and Virgil seem pretty cool with Thomas it would just feel weird to suddenly have them angry with him again, wouldn’t it?

Part Four: The Problem

Sanders Asides was originally described as being a series separate from the main storyline of Sanders Sides. Promising us shorter, less complicated episodes to give us a little something in between the longer, heavier episodes in Sanders Sides. This was a great idea that ended up falling apart the moment it began.

When I was going through SVS, DWIT, and POF I mentioned that the three of them felt like a trilogy. All three of them link together to tell one bigger story, and on their own they get the job done. They set up the season finale perfectly to the point where you have an idea of what to expect and what to look forward to.

The main things being the aftermath of Virgil’s reveal and Roman’s breakdown, which would most likely cultivate in them teaming up against Janus. This would also involve Virgil coming to terms with his past and Roman having to face Remus.

Of course, none of this has been officially confirmed, but given everything we’ve seen up to this point it just makes sense.

The story for season two is nearly complete, all we’re missing is the conclusion.

Then Sanders Asides showed up and threw everything off course. What was supposed to be its own thing crept into a story that was already (for all we knew) set up and being put into place.

We were told that the Asides wouldn’t do anything to disrupt the flow of Sanders Sides, yet it’s been confirmed that there will be one or two more episodes of Asides before we get the season finale.

Why? Why are these episodes necessary when everything was set to move forward after POF? If these episodes are that important that they absolutely have to be made before the finale then why are they simply not part of the main series?

You could say “Well they’re not directly tied to the main plot, that’s why.” But need I remind you that Asides as a concept was just intriduced after DWIT came out? These episodes were written specifcally for Asides, which unless I’m wrong means that they were just added into the main story with no planning whatsoever.

FWSA honestly feels like it should have been the start of season three, something that should have waited to be introduced after season two wrapped up because it’s just too much.

We already have so much to unpack from SVS, DWIT, and POF now we also have a new love interest on top of that?

Virgil and Thomas’ resolution doesn’t even feel all that special because it wasn’t talked about directly between them. Thomas was indirectly letting Virgil know they were still okay, so what does that leave for us? All that build up about Virgil being a “Dark Side” only for it to be brushed over like it was nothing, and this happened in an Asides episode, not even in the main series.

It also makes Virgil’s absence in POF confusing when they had already set up the perfect reason for him to be absent in DWIT, but according to the first episode of ATHD Virgil and Thomas are okay with each other. Sure, Virgil being there might have made things worse but at that point everyone was making things worse.

We no longer have a confrontation between Thomas and Roman to look forward to because in FWSA we see them interacting as normal. Even the passive agressiveness isn’t anything new to Roman and really, it all just sounds super petty which he had been known to behave like that even when nothing is seriously wrong. Not only that Roman is overjoyed at the end, having finally gotten something he desperately wanted, the happy ending he deserved.

All that’s left for him is to fave his feelings towards Remus, but what would even happen there?

The problem with Asides isn’t the quality of the episodes, FWSA is actually one of my favorite episodes. The problem with Asides is that the team is taking what should have been something small and turning it into a far too elaborate for what its original purpose was: To give us more lighthearted content to enjoy in between the waits for the heavier episodes.

Instead it just feels like they’re adding onto something that really didn’t need adding on to, creating more work for themselves when it just isn’t necessary, and that worries me.

Final Thoughts

Honestly, it’s hard for me to make all these judgments when no one has any idea what the finale is going to be like. And usually, the team is able to excede my expectations and create something amazing.

But with all these new Asides episodes that feel like they’re just being crammed in at the last second, it makes me wonder how the rest of the series will go if they continue down this road.

Season two started September 1st, 2017, it is now January 3rd, 2021. Throughout season two the production of episodes became more elaborate, and there have been complications that arose from trying to make these videos as a result that sent production screeching to a halt. And on top of that, these Sanders Asides have been added to create even more work for Thomas and the team.

I don’t understand why they’d do this to themselves when it’s already become more difficult than ever to make videos in general, not just Sanders Sides.

We were offered something simple that would have satisfied everyone during the difficult times, only to be given something that honestly, wasn’t even needed. I do appreciate Thomas trying to get us more content, but I don’t think he or the team realizes just how content we’d all be with just a five minute video of the characters we love just doing something as simple as hanging out and having fun, especially with how dark things have become all around us.

We don’t always have to be watching these characters struggle, sometimes we just need to see them be genuinely happy.

(Thanks to everyone who took time to read this monster of a post, I did not mean for it to get this long but it’s been dwelling on my mind for a while and I wanted to make sure I got out everything I wanted to say. Again, this is all just a personal opinions and you are not obligated to agree with me. If you have an objecting opinion I would not mind hearing it but please keep any discussions civil.)

#dukeofcritical #sanders sides #ts criticism #sanders sides criticism #patton sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #long post

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bothcreativitybois · 3 years

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Schedules

This is a fic I wrote as a gift for @star-crossed-shipper I don’t usually write analogical stuff so I hope this pleases you all. Wordcount: 5633 Ship: Analogical TWs: Swearing, panic attacks, sexual refrences, hyperfocusing, isolating. Taglist (ask to be added): @crazydemigod666 @newtnotfound

Everything was running like clockwork. Wake up at seven am, personal grooming until seven twenty, head downstairs to make coffee, give Patton his muffin and hot chocolate at seven thirty three, make two eggs and a slice of toast with Crofters at seven thirty five, Roman’s grand entrance at seven forty, eat breakfast at seven forty five. It was now seven fifty, he had another three minutes to finish his breakfast. Then two minutes to rinse his plate. Everything had it’s time, everything fit into his neat little schedule. “Good morning, Pierce The Virge.” Roman announced from the kitchen as he mixed his tea. Logan swerved in his stool. Nearly everything fit in his schedule. “To what do we owe the pleasure of your face before noon?” Virgil was never awake this early. Then again Virgil had no schedule. Everyone else had one, even if they didn’t realise, and Logan had mapped them to fit his own. But Virgil just… did things. Virgil grumbled something and stole the toast off of Logan’s plate. “Hey!” Logan protested. “Your brother’s being loud in my room.” Virgil answered Roman. Logan noticed Virgil wasn’t wearing his usual jacket. Maybe Virgil was who he had heard in the laundry last night? Virgil took a bite of the toast. Logan stood up with his plate and walked around the counter to the kitchen. “That would be because I vanquished him from Patton’s room.” Roman said. He and Virgil were blocking the sink. He needed to rinse his plate but they were talking in his way. It would be rude to interrupt their conversation. Logan put a hand on the small of Virgil’s back to try and communicate that he needed to get past. Virgil jumped at the sudden touch and looked back. He caught Logan’s eyes and his face flushed. Logan wasn’t usually the touchy type. “Excuse me.” Logan said. His voice was still tired and a little rough, it made Virgil’s heart skip a little and his mind raced. Logan noticed the edge of Virgil’s make-up began to sparkle. “Hey! Wheezer! You paying attention?” Roman said, snapping Virgil back to reality. Roman pulled Virgil out of the way so Logan could get past. “Thank you, Roman.” Logan said. His head felt weird, it was lighter. Almost dizzy. Was he dehydrated? Virgil dropped his stolen toast and ran from the room. “Virgil?” Patton tried as Virgil ran. He didn’t stop. Logan ignored what happened and rinsed his plate like he intended. Roman and Patton looked at him in disbelief. “That wasn’t very nice, Logan.” Patton said. Logan put down the plate and checked his watch. “I don’t believe I did anything rude.” Logan replied. “They were talking and I needed to get past so I used a non-verbal gesture so as to not interrupt.” Roman rolled his eyes, Patton sighed. “Yes but people may not like you touching them without warning. Especially Virgil since he has a crush-” Roman jumped across the counter and put a hand over Patton’s mouth. “Crushing amount of social anxiety!” Roman finished. Patton looked at Roman and nodded furiously. That was unusual. “Yes well I thought it would be more rude to interrupt the conversation to tell him he was in the way. I believe I did what was most socially acceptable.” Logan said. “Besides his make-up sparkled which usually only happens when he is excited so it couldn’t have been too intrusive.” Roman and Patton looked at eachother flatly. Logan was so smart yet so damn clueless. Patton gently removed Roman’s hand from his face. “Still it may be best to apologise.” Patton suggested. “You know, for good measure?” Logan gazed up at the stairs, there was a tingling sensation in his stomach. He was sure he’d cooked the eggs thoroughly. Was this connected to the dizziness? He looked back down at his watch. The minute ticked over. “I cannot.” Logan said and began walking out of the kitchen. Roman and Patton began whispering to each other. “Why?” Roman asked as Logan began climbing the stairs. “I have a schedule to keep.”

After being startled Virgil had run back to his room out of habit. He slammed the door shut and sat against it, holding his head. He mumbled incoherently to himself. Unfortunately he’d forgotten the mustached menace in the room. “Really I’m giving you my best here but you’re scared when you leave the room?” Remus pouted. Virgil looked up in shock. Remus knew that look. “A panic attack? I really have been bested.” Virgil looked back down. “Not now, Remus.” He mumbled. Remus slinked over curiously. “Who was it?” Remus asked. Virgil tried to push him away weakly but couldn’t. “Was it my brother? No he’s way too weak.” “Go away!” Virgil curled up tighter. “It obviously wasn’t Daddy Patty.” Remus continued. “It could’ve been Janny but I doubt he’s out of the bath yet. Did you see Scales’ big ol’ trouser snake?” Remus lifted Virgil's head to get a reaction. “Get lost, Crap Face!” Virgil yelled as he pulled out of Remus’ grasp. That insult was weak even for Virgil. “Well then it must’ve been Dirty Nerdy.” Virgil’s head shot up, giving Remus his answer. “Ooh it was. Tell me what did he do? Did he tell you about the sun exploding? The chances of the earth being hit by an apocalyptic sized meteor?” Remus pressed. Virgil buried his head and tried to ignore him. Then Remus caught a glimpse of sparkle under Virgil’s eye. He smiled knowingly. “Or maybe he tried to kiss ya?” “Stop!” Virgil’s voice echoed loudly. Remus knew he’d hit something with that. “So you wanna bone the teacher? I mean I guess I get it… if you’re into the nerdy emotionally cut off but goes off like a rocket in bed type.” Virgil began picturing it, he didn’t want to but he did. Why did Remus have to know just how to get to him? “No!” Virgil yelled. “Oh so I’m wrong? You don’t want him to kiss your neck? Or see his glasses fog up when you’re pinned to his wall?” Remus kept going. Virgil kept unwillingly picturing everything he said. “Go! Away!” Virgil struggled loudly. “Is it because you want to be in charge? You want to throw him on your bed. You want to pull him down by his tie so his face is between-” “Please stop!” Why was Virgil so embarrassed? “You want him on all fours begging for-” Out of everyone Remus was the least likely to judge him. “Fuck off!” It may be his chance to actually talk about it. “You want to bend him over your leg and-” Maybe it was best to let Remus win. “You’re right, Remus!” Virgil snapped finally. That was probably the first time anyone had ever said that. “I think Logan is hot! I want to kiss him! I want to cuddle! I even want to do… that too! I want Logan!” Remus smiled smugly. Virgil took a few deep breaths. “See? Was it really that hard to admit?” Remus teased. Virgil leaned his head back against the door. “Yes.” Virgil replied. “Logan doesn’t have feelings, or at least not the same way we do. And even if he did there’s no way he’d actually like me back. I’m… me.” Virgil felt hopeless. For pete's sake he was talking to Remus. “You aren’t completely unfuckable.” Remus said. It was actually kind of reassuring. “You definitely have the kinky ‘step on me goth boy’ appeal.” Well by Remus standards at least. Virgil smiled a little. “Thanks.” He replied genuinely. “Well I feel wanted here which means it’s my cue to leave.” Remus said standing. He opened the door, hitting Virgil. “Whatever.” Virgil stood and trodded over to his bed and flopped down. Remus looked back at Virgil. “Hey?” Remus said to get Virgil’s attention. He looked up slightly. “You think if Logan gets some he wouldn’t be such a stick up my ass anymore?” Virgil threw a pillow at the door as Remus shut it.

Logan heard Remus in the hall as he worked. Maybe Remus would be able to help him with this. While he was messy and unproductive, this was a topic he’d sure like. Logan walked across the room and opened his door. “Remus.” Logan greeted leaning out the door. Remus turned quickly. “I haven’t even done anything yet. I’m just walking.” Remus replied. Logan rolled his eyes. “I believe your insight might be helpful to a problem I am trying to figure out.” Logan clarified. Remus groaned. “Do I have to?” Remus asked. “You don’t. But the problem is about illnesses and their symptoms so I figu-” Logan was nearly floored by the green blur rushing into his room. He looked in to see Remus sitting on his bed. Logan straightened his glasses and closed the door. “So who’s dying and how?” Remus asked. Logan took out a whiteboard and put it on a stand. He separated it into two sides. On the left he wrote ‘symptoms’ and the right ‘possible causes’. “Hopefully no one.” Logan began. “I believe I may have contracted something after our experiments last week in the imagination.” Logan wrote two symptoms on the board. Dizziness and unsettled stomach. Remus summoned a pair of thick fake glasses and slipped them on his face. He scratched his chin. “These seem pretty unexciting.” Remus said. “Anything else?” Logan took out a journal and flicked through the pages. He examined the logs from the days between when he and Remus experimented and now. “Yes.” Logan answered. Remus took the marker and got ready to write. “Five cases of tingling sensation in extremities. Each one seemingly isolated.” Remus added the list on the whiteboard. “Which parts?” Remus asked. Logan looked down then back up. “Be honest.” “Fingers, hands and toes.” Logan answered. Remus wrote one extra place. “Remus!” “If you won’t be honest I will!” Remus defended. Logan leaned over and wiped the crude word off. “I’ve also experienced temperature fluctuation.” Logan added. Remus wrote it and stepped back. “So far not really adding together.” Remus said. Logan looked over too. “Yes, I can’t see any connections either.” Logan commented then looked down again. “Well, are you sure that’s everything?” Remus tried to snatch away the book but Logan dodged. “I mean there’s some tachycardia I’ve been tracking but that’s been going on for longer than the figurative window. Same with some regular shortness of breath.” Logan added. Remus wrote that in the possible causes section. “That would only explain the dizziness and tingling. Maybe the fevers but that’s a long shot.” Remus nawed the marker, getting ink on his teeth. “But if you’ve been having those for longer than our experiment then it may be an underlying condition that’s only just rearing up.” Logan was actually impressed. He’d put the tachycardia and weak lungs down to stress and being generally unfit. “You… may have a point.” Logan admitted. “Maybe there’s something you missed further back? How long has this been going on?” Remus was suddenly serious. Logan thought that was impossible. He flipped through his logs. “The first time for the heart palpitations was a few months ago, I remember because it was the day when I got this new tie.” Logan explained. “What was happening when you got them?” Remus asked, tapping on the board slightly. “I don’t see how this is relevant?” Logan dodged the question. “Just indulge me.” Remus said. Logan sighed. “Uhm… it was while we were in a meeting with Thomas. Virgil had just shown us his new jacket.” Logan said. Remus lit up. He took off the glasses he was wearing and chewed on the arm. “And the shortness of breath?” Remus pressed. “Every morning before I walk down the stairs.” Logan informed. “And whose room is right there?” Remus quizzed. Logan began to catch on too. “Virgil’s room.” They’d found the common factor. “The tingling?” Remus pressed. “When I’ve been handing or taking things from Virgil!” Logan was getting excited. So was Remus. They’d figured it out. Remus threw his glasses across the room. “You know what this means?!” Remus asked. “Yes!” Logan answered. “I’m allergic to whatever Virgil’s hooded jacket is made of.” “Yes! Wait no…” Remus dissaggreed. Clearly they’d come to very different conclusions. “There’s only one way to find out.” Logan said before sinking out. Remus stood there for a second. “Oh this is gonna be a disaster…” Remus laughed.

Logan rose back up in the laundry room. Virgil wasn’t wearing his jacket earlier and Logan had heard someone in there last night. Given that it was past the time everyone else went to sleep, and Remus is allergic to soap and therefore hates that room, there was only one person it could’ve been. Logan looked at his watch. He had time, Patton doesn’t do laundry for another fifteen minutes. He opened the dryer, thankfully Virgil hadn’t taken his stuff yet. He pulled out the mass of black clothes and threw them around looking for the jacket. He found it and pulled it out. “Ah ha!” Logan said to himself. He held the jacket at arms length, carefully. If his hypothesis was true then this was the cause of his problems. He looked at the jacket, hoping it would cause something to happen. Nothing did. He slowly pulled the jacket closer. “Come on…” he waited but still nothing. Surely this had to be close enough. He wasn’t getting much closer than this to Virgil. There was a catch in his throat with that thought. His eyes went wide. It was working. Logan brought the jacket to his face. This would surely get a result. He sniffed the jacket deeply. “What the hell?” A voice came from behind Logan. He pulled the jacket away and turned around, Virgil was in the doorway. Why couldn’t Virgil just run on a schedule? Logan’s face flushed and his breath stopped. He felt his head get dizzy. “It worked!” Logan announced. He shook the jacket. Virgil wasn’t sure what he’d just walked into. His clothes were all over the floor and Logan was excited about sniffing his hoodie? “What…?” Virgil managed. Logan shook the clothes off his feet and rushed over to Virgil. He grabbed Virgil’s shoulders. Virgil blushed. “I’ve been feeling weird and I went over my symptoms with Remus and we figured out I am allergic to your jacket!” Logan explained. He noticed Virgil’s pale cheeks had gone red. “Wait a minute.” Logan leaned forward, inspecting Virgil’s face. If Virgil was also allergic then maybe they all were. Maybe Thomas was. Virgil wasn’t sure what to do, Logan was so close. His whole chest was full of butterflies, some fluttering into his throat. Instincts took over, but this time it wasn’t flight. Virgil quickly leaned forward and pressed a kiss on Logan’s lips. Just a quick peck, but it was enough to make them both leap back. Like they’d been shocked by electricity. Logan dropped the jacket. Neither moved. Neither spoke. Virgil’s mind was running with anxiety and doubts, Logan was going over the symptoms again. He was feeling them all at once. It wasn’t the jacket. Suddenly a figurative lightbulb lit up. Fast heartbeat, raised temperature, short breath, lightheadedness, tingling, these were things Roman’s songs were about. This was… attraction. Virgil couldn’t believe he’d just done that, he didn’t even ask first. He was embarrassed. He was a terrible person. He’d pushed his feelings on to Logan selfishly. Virgil took off down the hall, covering his face. Logan was frozen for a moment then went after him. “Whoa watch it, Kiddo!” Patton shouted as Virgil pushed past him. Patton with his laundry, like clockwork. Patton looked forward to see Logan also barreling toward him. “Wha slow down!” Logan skidded to a stop in front of Patton. “Apologies.” Logan said breathlessly. Patton looked up at Logan then down the hall where Virgil had just run. “What happened?” Patton asked. Logan wasn’t sure how to answer. He wasn’t sure if he was allowed to answer. He knew nothing about attraction. Or romance. He was clueless and he hated it. He looked down and saw Patton’s cat onesie hanging out of the washing basket. It gave him an idea. “Research….” Logan mumbled before running off. Patton was more confused than before.

Logan’s room was dark, a sign of just how focused he was. It was almost like the rest of the room didn’t exist. The only light was the bright double monitors illuminating Logan’s face harshly. Three books laid open against the screens. “That lighting is not flattering, dear.” Roman said to announce his presence. Logan didn’t look away from the screens. Roman took a few steps closer, he could see a few empty mugs and countless papers cluttering Logan’s desk. Logan himself was hunched deeply over his desk, scribbling furiously into a book. Roman put a cautious hand on Logan’s shoulder. “Hey Logan, you doing okay?” Logan’s head snapped backwards, only just realising Roman was in the room. “Perfect perfect Roman you are perfect.” Logan muttered at a nearly incoherent speed. Logan’s eyes were wide and tired, it scared Roman. He pulled himself away from them to examine what was on the screens. “Is that Crazy Rich Asians and… Eat, Pray, Love?” Roman asked. The movies were going fast, playing at double the speed. “Yes.” Logan answered hurriedly. “Well that can’t be a melodic mix- Wait you hate romantic movies.” Roman was confused. Everything about this situation was out of character for Logan. “I came to tell you Patton made breakfast but I fear I stumbled upon something worrying.” “It’s morning?” Logan asked quickly. Roman nodded. Logan thought for a moment. “I should raise it to 2.5 speed…” Logan grabbed his mouse and began adjusting the movies. Roman backed up slightly. “I don’t have a clue what is happening so I’m just gonna leave you to-” Roman began but Logan stood hurriedly and grabbed his arm. “No no no you’re just the person I need!” Logan said, pulling Roman back over. He picked up his notebook and shoved it towards Roman. “I have been isolating the root of romance. I am looking through every romantic book and movie and recording any recurring themes.” Roman couldn’t read the notes, both from the darkness and how messy they were. He looked past Logan back at the screens. “Is that my copy of Boyfriend Material?” Roman pushed past Logan and took the book off the desk. “Yes. And your copy of Fifty Shades Of Grey.” Logan added. Roman blushed. “Uh no… I uh that’s Remus’ clearly.” Roman stammered. “What was this about isolation and themes?” Logan handed the notebook to Roman and wiped his whiteboard clean. He drew a three circle venn diagram. “I have isolated three elements to a successful romantic coupling.” Logan began. He wrote the first element, vulnerability. “Vulnerability. I’ve noticed most courting at some point or another has someone, usually the male, do something embarrassing or risky. I believe this is what you refer to as ‘grand romantic gestures’, correct?” Logan waited for a response. “Well… I guess?” Roman answered. “But what is the poin-'' Logan wasn’t listening. “Second, sacrifice.” Logan wrote the word down in another bubble. “The relationship does not start until one or more people give something up. Usually something that causes figurative friction between them and the other person.” Roman had an objection. “That is a rather cynical way to-” Logan still wasn’t listening. “And finally.” Logan wrote the final element. “Desire. Shared attraction is key to the relationship becoming romantic. If it’s one-sided then everything will fail and the attracted subject will be subject to embarrassment and sadness. If there is no desire then… I mean they just don’t become romantic partners.” Logan finished by writing one final word in the overlapping sections, Romance. Roman looked over the diagram closely. “May I ask a question?” Roman finally had the chance to speak. Logan made a gesture for him to continue. “Why the sudden interest in how romance works past, and I quote, ‘an uncontrollable and unfortunate chemical reaction’?” Logan’s face flushed although Roman couldn’t tell in the darkness. “I uh… Well I just think… You see…” Logan couldn’t find a way to answer. Roman rolled his eyes, Logan struggled with emotions and abstracts. He tried to rephrase. “Are you planning on being romantic with someone?” Roman gave a simple yes or no. Logan nodded. Now they were getting somewhere. “Has anything happened between you and this guy yet?” Roman was trying to figure out what exactly was happening. “Be more specific.” Logan said. “Has anything that you would classify as romantic happened between you and this guy?” Roman tried again. Logan’s face burned as he recalled the kiss. This time it was enough for Roman to see. He smiled. “Yes…” Logan answered. “Okay well may I suggest one change to your approach?” Roman asked. Logan held out the marker for him. Roman stepped forward and began rubbing off the diagram with his sleeve. Logan panicked and pulled him away. “Whoa wait what was that?” Logan asked, shocked. “Logan, listen to me.” Roman said and grabbed Logan’s arms. “You’re doing this wrong, and I bet you know it.” Logan pushed Roman off. “I don’t know what you mean.” Logan said. Why would he do this if he didn’t think it’d work? Roman clapped his hands and Logan’s lights turned on. “Look around.” Roman demanded, taking Logan’s shoulders again. In the light it looked so much worse. He could see every crumpled note, every coffee stain, every hastily scribbled note, every smudge on his glasses. “Does this look efficient or healthy?” Logan looked across at a mirror. He had dark bags under his eyes and his hair was akin to a bird's nest. “No…” Logan admitted. “But why else would I do this?” Logan’s voice was weak. Roman sat him down on his bed. “You’re confused would be my guess. You’re not used to strong emotions like this so you’re trying to turn them into statistics and formulas.” Logan held his head in his hands. He didn’t like this. Roman looked down softly. “And maybe you’re holding yourself up in your room to avoid Virgil.” Logan reeled back. He didn’t remember telling Roman who he was having romantic feelings for. “How…” Logan tried. “Virgil is also hiding, which isn’t unusual for him but it doesn’t take a genius to put two and two together.” Roman explained, sitting next to the other man. Logan fell onto his back. Roman was right, he was confused. This wasn’t his area of expertise, hell that was probably an understatement. “Roman… please help me.” Logan finally asked quietly. “You are the expert. In everything I’ve researched it’s shown as a natural instinct or a happy daze but… I’m not used to emotions I can’t control. It’s overwhelming. I can’t do anything about it.” Roman brought his legs up on the bed to face Logan. “Tell me exactly what happened.” Roman said. Logan covered his face and sighed. He wasn’t quite sure how to explain it. “I was looking at his face for symptoms of allergies and he kissed me then ran away.” Logan summarised. Roman ignored the first part about allergies, he wasn’t even going to ask. “Heh, I’m surprised he had the guts to make the move. I owe Patton five bucks.” Roman joked. Logan shot a hard glare. “Did you talk to Virgil about it?” Logan sat up with a huff. “No, we haven’t talked since that happened.” Logan clarified. Roman put a hand over his heart dramatically. “Honestly, what did I expect from you two?” Roman sighed. “Can you be serious please?” Logan begged. Roman put up his hands in surrender. “Listen, the solution is simple. Virgil kissed you because he has romantic feelings for you. And you have romantic feelings for him, correct?” Roman already knew the answer but waited for Logan to nod to continue. “So go tell him. Talk to him and be honest about how you feel and what you want.” Roman advised. He really had to explain the basics, huh? Logan looked over confused. “I don’t need flowers or like… fairy lights on a boat in front of the statue of liberty?” Logan asked genuinely. Roman laughed. “Romance isn’t as complicated as you’ve made yourself think it is. As long as you’re open and honest with him you’ll do fine.” Roman looked over Logan once more. “A nap and shower wouldn’t hurt your chances either…” Roman stood up and collected the mugs from Logan’s desk. Logan began to lay down. “Thank you.” Logan said as Roman reached the door. Roman smiled back and flicked off the light. “For what it’s worth, I believe in you.” Roman said as he shut the door. Logan laid on his back, staring at the roof. His tired brain began planning the script for the coming conversation.

Virgil didn’t know just how long he’d been locked away, curled up in the heaviest fluffiest blanket he had. Loud music blasted through his headphones. His world was crumbling around him but he was paralyzed and couldn’t do anything to stop it. He knew that reasonably he could just walk down the hall and talk to Logan, but his fear had tied him to his bed. Every worst case scenario danced around his room for him to watch helplessly. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do. Maybe the Others would take him back? Maybe he could just disappear into the imagination? He could probably convince one of the twins to conjure him a nice replica of Sally's tower from Nightmare Before Christmas. A loud knock managed to just get through Virgil’s headphones. “Not now!” Virgil shouted weakly. He was too busy having a crisis to talk to anyone.Whoever it was knocked again. Virgil took off his headphones. “Go away!” He shouted with a bit more strength. “Virgil, it’s Logan.” The knocker announced. Virgil nearly fell off the bed, his chest which had felt hollow seconds before exploded with activity. He couldn’t speak. “We should talk.” Logan said after a minute. Possibilities rushed around quick enough to crack Virgil’s skull. He stood slowly and took a small step towards the door, still silent. “Virgil please, we should both have a chance to be honest about our feelings.” Logan’s stoic voice cracked. Virgil walked up to the door. He knew Logan was persistent, he wouldn’t give up. Virgil rested his head against the door. “I’m scared…” Virgil couldn’t manage any more than that. The doorknob turned and Virgil took a step back. Logan didn’t enter the room, just standing in the doorway. “I think I’m scared too…” Logan said weakly. Virgil looked across the room at his clock. “It’s four pm, shouldn’t you be reading?” Virgil said to try and lighten the mood, it worked as Logan laughed slightly. “Well I never really could fit you into my schedule...” Logan joked. “May I please enter?” Virgil took a step away, signalling for Logan to come in. Stepping across the threshold made it feel real, Logan realised just what he was about to do. Virgil shut the door and stood there awkwardly. Logan turned to face him. “I’m guessing this is about… y’know…” Virgil tried to avoid the word. Logan nodded. “You kissed me…” Logan finished. Virgil bristled at the bluntness. Neither knew what to do, they just stood there. “I’m sorry.” Virgil apologised. He wasn’t sure if it was for the kiss, or the awkwardness. Logan looked over at Virgil’s bed. “Perhaps it would be better if we made ourselves comfortable?” Logan said. Virgil nodded. They both awkwardly walked over, sitting down on opposite sides of the bed. They both stared at the wall across from them, scared to look at the other. Neither could speak. What were they meant to say? Thoughts and fears wrapped around Virgil’s brain, squeezing his brain to say something but nothing came out. Logan looked at Virgil and saw how scared he looked. He had to say something. “Do you think I’m attractive?” Logan asked quickly. Virgil’s head snapped to Logan, his face glowing red. How was he meant to answer that? Why was Logan so calm? Did Logan hate him? Logan hated him. He had ruined everything. He was a terrible person. Logan noticed Virgil’s breaths quicken, his eyes faded in and out of focus. Virgil rocked back and forth slightly, his thoughts couldn’t stop. Logan moved closer as Virgil began pulling at his bangs. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Virgil repeated weakly. Logan put a hand on Virgil’s shoulder, Virgil didn’t even notice the touch. “It’s okay.” Logan tried to reassure. “Focus on breathing.” Virgil couldn’t hear Logan, his thoughts were too loud. They were blocking out everything, he couldn’t escape. They curled around his throat and blocked out the air. They blocked his eyes in the form of hot stinging tears. They blocked his ears so he could only hear the darkness of his own mind. “I ruined everything. I’m sorry. Fuck.” Virgil kept muttering weakly. Logan got closer again. He pulled Virgil’s hand away from his head so he wasn’t pulling his hair. He put the hand against his chest. “Virgil, you didn’t ruin anything.” Logan tried to reason with Virgil but could barely scratch at his swirling thoughts. “Please try and breathe with me.” He just needed to get through. Virgil began scratching at his collarbone with the hand Logan wasn’t holding. Logan knelt in front of Virgil and grabbed his other hand, trying to stop any damage. “No no please no.” Virgil kept muttering through heavy breaths. Logan tried to get close enough for Virgil to see but not hit his head. “Virgil you can breathe, just breathe please.” Logan begged. Virgil shook his head. He couldn’t. He couldn’t do anything. He couldn’t. Virgil began shaking his head more violently. Logan’s hands were already taken up. He let go of Virgil’s hands and opted to pull him down into a full embrace, pressing Virgil’s head against his shoulder with one hand and rubbing his back gently with the other. Virgil's arms stuck out weirdly for a moment before grabbing Logan’s shirt. He pulled at the fabric desperately. Not to try and escape but just to get hold of something. Virgil felt the gentle strokes on his back, the only thing that broke through the darkness. He tried to breathe with them. He had to. Logan noticed Virgil’s breaths become a little deeper, he realised he’d somehow gotten through. “Virgil, you're doing great. Keep going, please.” Logan’s voice was a little panicked even though he tried to stay stoic. Virgil kept timing the breaths with the strokes on his back. Slowly they became deeper, then less shaky. Slowly the darkness gave way to a light dizzy feeling from the lack of air. He stopped tugging at Logan’s shirt which was fully untucked at the back now. “I’m sorry…” Virgil managed weakly, this time less of a worried mumble and more a real apology. “You have nothing to be sorry for.” Logan said. Virgil pulled away from Logan, their legs stil knotted together but leaning instead on the bed so he could see Logan. His breaths still laboured. Logan grabbed Virgil’s hand. “I want us to be honest, please. Can you do that?” Logan asked. Virgil nodded slightly. “I will.” Virgil agreed. “But please don’t be mad at me.” Logan pushed some damp hair off Virgil’s face and nodded. Virgil nodded back. Logan thought carefully on what to say. “Can you tell me why you kissed me?” Logan asked. He wanted to know. Virgil did too. He looked away. “I don’t know.” Virgil answered after a beat. “You were close and I got flustered because… I really like you…” Virgil had finally admitted it. Logan’s heart felt weird. “You can ask me something.” Logan said. They both had things they wanted to know, it would be more efficient to take turns. Virgil thought for a moment. “Are you mad at me?” Virgil asked. Logan laughed lightly, he squeezed Virgil’s hand. “Not at all.” Logan reassured. “Did you enjoy kissing me?” Virgil squirmed. “I felt bad for not asking, and I was scared you would hate me.” Virgil answered. “Did you enjoy it?” Logan thought for a moment. It was a very quick kiss, but thinking about it made him smile. “I think I did.” Logan said. “It made me realise I have romantic feelings for you.” Virgil smiled slightly before covering his face with his arm, his chin resting on his knee. Logan felt himself blush. “Can I kiss you again?” Virgil asked quietly. Logan laughed. “I think it was my turn for a question…” Logan joked. He moved Virgil’s arm out of the way and rested his chin on Virgil’s knee too. Their noses touching and their eyes looking deeply into each other's. “Can you kiss me again?” Virgil closed the gap and pressed another quick kiss against Logan’s lips. Another sweet and light peck. They both smiled, absolutely giddy. Virgil put a hand on the back of Logan’s neck, making small circles with his thumb. “Do you want to be my boyfriend?” Virgil asked. Logan answered by leaning into another kiss, deeper than the last two. More hurried and warm. They stayed there until they were breathless. “I think I can fit that in my schedule.” Logan breathed happily as they pulled away. “You know I’m not going to stick to it.” Virgil said as he grabbed Logan’s tie, pulling him into another kiss. The world melted away around them, minutes ticked by carelessly. Maybe he didn’t need to schedule everything.

#roman took over #analogical #analogical fanfic #sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #virgil sanders #ts virgil #logan sanders #ts logan #logan x virgil #romantic analogical #ts remus #remus sanders #thomas sanders

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evertriedsoywithyourpopcorn · 3 years

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5 Reasons Roman Is Infuriating (And Why I DO NOT have a crush on him)

(Logince with a bit of denying and pining) Read on AO3

My first fic, based on my Logince drawing (If someone ever wants to make anything based on my art, feel free to ask. Making content is hard and people fleshing out concepts is always fun.) Word count: 3641

Tw: Cursing, Food mention, Balloon popping, Remus being his authentic self

Character’s: Remus, Virgil, Janus, Logan, Roman (At the end), Patton (Mainly implied)

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He had everything ready.

"Ahem."

Three heads turn to look at him.

"Logan, I really don't understand why you're doing this. You know I'm literally the Lord of the Lies, right? I can tell when you're lying."

"Falsehood. I am here specifically to prove to you three, the ones that have doubted me the most, what I think of Roman, so that you'll stop teasing me about emotions that aren't even there." Logan says, standing in front of a long classroom table. Virgil, Janus and Remus sit there, each maintaining their own postures and looking at him with disbelieving expressions.

"Logan, we can see your heart boner from here. You really think you can convince us with a slideshow presentation?" Remus picks his teeth, seemingly bored of the idea.

"That's exactly what I'm doing- What? Why would my heart have a boner? It doesn't have the proper parts to do that-" Logan looks lost, clutching the presentation button in his hand.

"It's an expression, Pocket Protector. It means you've got feelings for him." Virgil sighs.

Logan squints at him. "Of course I have feelings for him." Logan looks behind him, to the SmartBoard behind him. The board turns on, displaying the presentation title. "And those feelings are feelings of irritation. My name is Logan Sanders, and welcome to my Ted Talk."

There is a collective sigh from the others.

Logan takes a pointer stick (the one with the little hand on one side) from a holder on the wall, and points at the words on the screen. "This is 5 reasons why Roman is infuriating. And unlike your cognitive distortions may suggest, I DO NOT have a crush on him." He gestures with the stick where the same thing is written. "So, let's begin."

~~~

1. He likes to insist that he's the most handsome side, despite us all looking like Thomas.

It's ridiculous. All of their traits are reminiscent of Thomas's.

There are some mild changes they go through when they aren't summoned, but they are just slight shifts. For example, Janus and Remus both have different long hairstyles, and they all have a bit of a hair color change. Their features do shift too, emulating ones Thomas has seen over his lifetime that he'd associate with their personalities.

However, in person and in the mindscape, Roman really thinks 'he's the sh*t' (Virgil taught him that expression). He flaunts his beauty over everyone else's, strutting like the prettiest peacock in the flock. Sure, he's good looking, but the same level of good looking as all the other sides.

"You're all so handsome. But not as handsome as me." Logan recalls him saying in an episode.

He tries to use it to one-up the other's, even though they all know they look the same. He also enjoys flaunting his ego, attempting to emulate a lifestyle of the rich and famous when he feels like it.

It's rather ridiculous.

"You think he's good-looking?" Remus coos.

Logan glares, and changes the slide of the presentation.

2. He fights everyone all the time. (Except for Patton)

It seems that Roman has made the most rivals out of everyone.

He's rivals with his brother, he's got a rivalry with Janus but with more betrayal behind it, he's got his past rivalry with Virgil, even though now they're the closest friends, and despite making up several times, Logan is also his rival. Patton seems to be fine, despite their post-wedding event. Logan believes Roman is too worried of defending what he believes in against the literal embodiment of Thomas's morality.

"So, you two have tried making up, but have you considered... Making out???" Remus pitches, his smile all teeth.

Logan sputters a bit. "Puh- Wha- I don't think that would work."

Logan has in fact not thought of making out with Roman, thank you very much. Not even when they're so close, passionately arguing about who-knows-what in the spur of the moment, where it would be so easy to move just a little bit closer and connect his lips to the soft pink ones of the prince.

He has not thought about making out with Roman, because he does not have a crush on him. Period. End of story.

The two of them argue a lot. Whether it's how Thomas should spend his day, to the Chicken or the Egg dilemma (Logan knows he's right, by the way, Roman just won't see that the egg came first), to the ideal temperature for a heating pillow, to the best Crofter's flavor. They can range from productive, to stupid, and by the end of it they may just be fighting about nothing at all.

They jab at each other, come up with clever arguments, and although they're technically fighting, it sometimes feels more like a duel.

"Or a mating ritual." Virgil says under his breath.

"These points don't sound very negative." Janus adds, twirling some of his hair with his finger.

"It is negative. We fight a lot. He fights people a lot. Every issue seems to be a battle to him that he can outmatch, despite being better suited as a civil discussion." Logan stands taller, trying to defend his point.

"Well, that makes sense. I understand this point now. Go on." Janus waves his gloved hand in a dismissive gesture.

"Alright." Logan clicks his presenter button, and the slide changes.

3. He's loud. Super loud. All the time.

From singing to dancing to bantering, there never does seem to be a dull moment when Roman is around. Some may call it nice, but Logan would say that's a very polite description. It certainly isn't nice when Logan's trying to get work done, or watch a movie, or enjoy a peaceful breakfast, or most of the time really.

Logan has stopped working outside when he's trying to be productive because Roman will, without fail, come in singing, and then start a little fight with Logan that distracts him from his work and renders him unproductive for a long time because all he can think about is Roman.

"Hm... Wonder why that is." Janus interrupts, rolling his eyes.

"Well, you don't need to wonder. I said it was because of our fighting." Logan nervously adjusts his already immaculately placed glasses, resuming his point to his slide presentation.

It's odd, because sometimes even without leaving his room, he can still hear the sounds of Roman's voice in his head. He theorizes the absence of all that noise is making him subconsciously fill it in ( even though his mind also provides him with clear images of Roman's smile).

He can't escape the noise on movie nights. Roman will sing along to any song, scream at the most poorly-timed jumpscares, and no matter what, criticize the movie. Logan does participate in that last step from time to time.

During dinners, it depends. Sometimes, Roman will come in and do his thing, sometimes he'll make a dramatic entrance, grab a plate and then go off to work on something, and sometimes he won't show up at all, off on a quest in the imagination. Those particular meals are peaceful. Sometimes they feel empty, but so far, no one else has complained. Especially considering with Remus' and Janus' seats added to the table, dinner can be a wild event.

Sometimes, when Logan gets lonely, he'll bring his work outside. Every time, he can guarantee that Roman will be there eventually. He provides a healthy distraction, and he always feels much lighter after a bantering session.

But most of the time, he just can't stand it. How can one be so flamboyant for so many hours of the day? Logan had theorized it had something to do with overcompensation, his need for validation and attention, but then thought it was strange theorizing about his friends and went back to work.

Overall, not the worst trait, but it being applied to every scenario adds to the fact that he is infuriating.

"Hold on, can we circle back to the part where you said you thought of him smiling-" Virgil begins, only to be interrupted by Logan pointing his pointer at him.

"No, we will not. Next point."

4. He makes up stupid nicknames.

And he makes a lot of them. Even during serious talks, you'd think he had forgotten your name and was too scared to ask, so he supplies an abundance of back-ups to make you feel special. And they are quite varied, though all slightly jabbing. There are play-on-words, references thrown about... It would have impressed Logan, had all of his designated nicknames not revolved around him being a nerd.

"Hey Microsoft Turd."

"I need your help, Egghead."

"Listen here, Erlenmeyer Trash-"

"Calculator Watch."

"Oh Book Geeeerm~"

"Sure thing Specs."

Logan actually didn't mind specs, but his point still stands. All insulting, clever, but still stupid nicknames. Sometimes, he wonders if Roman keeps a book of them around. Somewhere in his room, filled with all the names he'll unleash onto his unsuspecting companions. Logan may have tried to come up with a list of his own in retaliation, but he couldn't think of anything Roman would think was clever. He spent almost a full night on it, hair a mess, glasses askew, head resting on his desk as he tried to come up with something at least remotely good enough. It interrupted his perfect circadian rhythm. Never again.

Except for the next night, where he tried the exact same stunt again, but that doesn't matter.

What does, is that all of those factors cause aggravation. He always feels weird when Roman gives him a nickname, varying from annoyance to a strange tingling.

"Are you saying he should stop?" Virgil interrupts, frustrated. "This point is going nowhere."

"I-" He's not sure. Although some of the insults are quite jabbing, Logan does want to support Roman's creative process. Not to mention, the nickname ‘specs’ oddly does hold a place in his heart.

"OoOoOoohhh, I have an idea!" Remus cackles. Although Logan is hesitant, he gestures to continue. "Okay, so pinky swear I won't try anything on you, but just close your eyes, and imagine how this nickname would make you feel if Roman said it."

Logan apprehensively closes his eyes, and Remus does nothing but lean slightly forward in his seat, and puts on his best Roman impression. Which is pretty good, considering they're twin brothers.

"How are you today, my love?"

Immediately, Logan flushes bright red from head to toe, covering his face in his hands and squirms. Remus's cackling intensifies by a tenfold, and the other two are poorly failing to contain their laughter.

"That's- That's- That's... N-not a nickname. Th-That's a p-pet name."

"Awww, but you're blushiiiing!" Remus squeals in amusement.

"Falsehood. N-no." Logan says, not enough bite in it to hold value. "We are going to move on now. That just... caught me off guard." He says, adjusting his tie several times, trying to compose himself. "The point is, his nicknames are stupid, and I don't like them- No, don't look at me like that Remus even that one- so it adds to his infuriating nature." Logan grabs the presentation button and clicks it aggressively to the next slide.

"And now, for my concluding point."

5. He is incredibly and willingly dumb.

Sometimes Logan thinks he wouldn't be surprised by the illogical things Roman would say. And then he gets proven incredibly wrong.

"Much like your... 'illogical feelings', mayhaps?" Janus drawls.

Shush, Logan is talking.

Granted, both Creativity twins have proven to be rather illogical, as they are embodiments of creativity, a force that knows only slight bounds to logic. Only with a defying mind can people push boundaries in the advancement of society. That doesn't mean however that those defying minds need to be intelligent.

"I believe Virgil specifically had called Roman a.." He takes out his special cards, flipping through them. " 'A Himbo'. Judging from his past and present behaviors and from the definition itself, it is safe to assume that yes, he is in fact a Himbo."

One instance he can remember is during a picnic in the imagination. It was Patton's birthday, and Roman wanted to do something special, so he set up a picnic for them all to attend. Logan doesn't enjoy visiting the imagination as much, as when he's there, things become more realistic and that makes him feel like a burden. Regardless, it was for Patton's birthday, and so he decided it would be polite to come along.

Everyone was guided by a trail of flowers to an opening in the forest, where a giant picnic blanket was laid out, pillows thrown around, and a large picnic basket stood in the center. There were many balloons of pastel pink and blue tied around, and the birds were chirping in a joint melody. It sounds almost like Happy Birthday.

Logan, as he approaches, hopes that his influence won't cause ants to emerge, because although that would be realistic, it would also be quite the nuisance.

He and the other's are just dressed in their usual attire, but as Roman emerges from the trees, he is wearing a shiny red party hat to go along with his prince outfit.

Roman immediately goes to serenading Patton and placing a party hat on top of his head, light blue with a little pompom on the top. He ushers him to sit on one of the largest pillows, and then goes around giving everyone else party hats. Logan stills when Roman gets to him last, a dark blue party hat with little stars in his hand.

"Do I have to wear that?" He asks. Although, sure, it does look nice, he doesn't want to seem ridiculous.

"Come on, you're in good company. Please? For Patton?" Roman bats his eyelashes at Logan, who sighs and lets him put the party hat onto his head.

Roman runs off to the birthday boy, and they all sit down. The time passes peacefully, songs being sung and Roman releasing a horde of puppies to the joy of the guests. By the time the food is out, everything seems to be going well, until they're all eating, and Roman pulls out an orange. As he's about to peel it, Logan speaks up.

"Roman, I would advise against that." Which may sound ridiculous to most people, but Logan is an expert on many logical things. ( Orange peels have a flammable liquid in them called limonene, and as both it and a balloon, made of latex, are non-polar, the liquid can dissolve the balloon, thus causing it to explode.)

"Against what?" Roman asks, but he does stop his attempt.

Logan adjusts his glasses, ready to explain. "Eating an orange near a balloon. As I cause the imagination to become more logical, doing so will most likely cause-"

"Oh puh-lease! I'm sure whatever wacky science things you're going to say don't actually work here! I mean, there is plenty of influence to go arou-" Roman, the spiteful side he is, gets even closer to the balloon, starting to peel it. Lo-and-behold, he can't finish his denying before the balloon right beside him explodes with a loud POP. The sound sends him jumping back in fear, screeching to the nine hells, and then falling backwards onto another balloon, scaring him again. Several sides laughed out loud at his pain, while Patton watched him, worried. Logan smiled internally at the karma, before getting up and making sure he was okay.

Roman did spend the rest of the party in a sulky mood, but the party was still a huge success. They had some good food, and while Logan made Patton a flower crown, he fed him forfulls of cake. It was a nice bonding moment. When everyone separated to return to the mindscape, Roman waved them all off from the imagination door. Logan turns back to look at him, but Roman makes no move to follow them all out.

"You're not coming back yet?" Logan asks, adjusting his glasses.

Roman sighs. "No, not yet. I'm afraid this dashing prince has a little bit of cleaning to do. And perhaps an adventure. You never know." He leans on the doorframe, smiling.

"Well, that is correct. I in fact do not know what you'll be doing." Logan nods to himself. "Do you need any help cleaning? I doubt I'll be much help with the adventure, but I do have hands." He gestures to his hands.

Roman looks quite surprised. "Oh, thanks for the offer, specs. I think I've got it all covered though."

Logan offers a hesitant smile. "Alright then. Let me know if that changes."

Roman quickly smiles back, a faint pink dusting his cheeks, and turns back into the imagination and shutting the door. Logan stands there for a moment, but not sure why. It's clear that Roman was not feeling all that great from the balloon moment. Even Logan, terrible at deciphering emotions, can tell that much. Perhaps he needs to let off some steam.

He just can't understand Roman most of the time. They do have so many similarities, being too proud for their own good, but it's almost like they're in two separate worlds. Logan, the learner he is, wishes he could explore Roman's own. Understand it. Understand him, and his way of thinking. Even though Roman is mostly dumb, he does make good points, and Logan tries to prioritize his input, as it's usually what Thomas is hoping and dreaming for as well.

~~~

The last slide shines back at them all. A concluding statement that makes the three watching sides snicker a little bit.

"And I believe he just doesn't understand how much we all think he's great. I swear, he's just so dense! It's so aggravating! How can he not tell that he's worth everything? Why doesn't he understand that we all care for him? That I care for him? He's wonderful, for god's sake! And that I don't mean to hurt him with my critiques. I want him to thrive! I-"

Everything stops. Logan takes a moment of silence. The three sides look at him, each with different degrees of anticipation. One looks pretty much ready to pounce out of his seat.

"...Oh."

And all at once, everything gets strung back into motion. Confetti literally falls from the ceiling as Remus jumps for joy, circling a very mortified looking Logan. Janus, the tired soul, rolls his eyes and lets out a slow, long clap. Virgil just rests his head in his arms.

"I can't believe this. You sit us all down for a presentation you probably double-checked and proofread, like a nerd, and only NOW you realize you were wrong all along? Why didn't you say anything, snake-face?" Virgil complains, sitting up just to glare at him.

"Wo-ow, it isn't as if I was saying that this whole time? No, it couldn't be." Janus deadpans, sarcasm spilling from his mouth like an old, worn, broken dam.

Logan doesn't move from his stand-still spot beside the projector, but Remus manages to bounce in circles around him, cooing. "Lo-lo's got a cruuuush! A crushy crush! A crushed crust of a crush! A crevice cracking ‘cause of the crushed crust-" He was going to continue, throwing expired banana peels around to substitute rose petals, until the sound of the door opening catches everyone's attention.

"Hey losers, Patton wanted to know if you-" Lo and behold, Roman walks in, regal as ever, smiling until he takes in the sight before him. The boring classroom look, contrasted by the amount of confetti that stopped falling as soon as he walked in. Janus and Virgil, wide-eyed and looking at him, completely still. Remus, caught mid dance, frozen in place with a smile. Logan, looking at him in the way one may look milliseconds after being caught stealing government secrets. Roman's eyes flicker to each of them, before settling on the projector.

"Roman. I-I can explain-" Logan starts, but Roman is already reading the words on the screen.

"... 'In short, he saddles me with unnecessary... feelings'? 'Unease, and uncertainty'? Who... Oh my god! Logan!" Roman looks at him, smiling in disbelief and amazement. "I know what this meanssss!" Filled with giddy delight, he sidesteps the table.

Logan gulps as Roman approaches, turning beet red as Roman takes his hands in his two own. "Y-Yes?" He practically squeaks as Roman looks him right in the eyes.

"Yes! Ohhh, this is so exciting!" The three bystanders watch, once again in anticipation, as Roman swings their interlocked hands.

"Yes?" Logan offers a small, tentative smile.

"You have a crush on someoooone! Oh Logan, you should've told me!" Roman smiles, completely oblivious to the internal facepalm of several present members.

"I-I'm sorry..." Logan looks down, slightly disappointed but still too flustered to say anything.

"God save the dense." Janus mutters, inspecting his gloves fingers.

"Don't be sorry! Come, we must make plans! I shall be your matchmaker! This is going to be perfeeeect!" Roman, sings, dancing out of the room and dragging Logan along by their still intertwined hands. The other sides watch them go.

After a moment of processing, Virgil sighs. "Well, I thought that was going to be resolved. Turns out they're both as dense as... dense people." He can't seem to think of any other similes.

"Welp, I'm just happy that they're one step closer to getting. it. on. romantically." Remus punctuates every word with some rather immature hand gestures. “And that they stop dancing around each other.”

"Who do you think Roman thinks Logan has a crush on?" Virgil asks, cogs turning in his brain.

Janus lounges backwards. "Well, let's see... Soooo many options. Either he thinks it's someone outside of Thomas's head, or the simple answer..."

Remus and Virgil both look at him, both with looks of realization.

"Patton."

~~~

#logince #logince fic #logan sanders #ts logan #remus sanders #janus sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #ts roman #implied patton sanders #tw food #oliver writes #i also snuck an ace attorney reference #i was going to wait but i'm just very excited to post this #5 Reasons fic

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achxllesworld · 2 years

Text

analogical fanfiction!!!

Logan recalled how off putting it felt to hear themself as a ‘he.’ Such a simple word it was with only one syllable and two letters. And yet, when pit against the new challenger in the ring, Logan surrendered to the fact that thinking of themself as neither ‘he’ nor ‘she’, but ‘they’ struck an unexplainable sense of satisfaction within. Akin to a finished puzzle piece laid on the ground or a solved rubix cube in one’s palm, Logan felt as though they had finally plucked the answer they had been missing all this time.

Nonbinary.

Unfortunately, Virgil liked boys, which Logan was obviously not.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/36902296

logan doesn't know how to baby talk.

he's trying though.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/36387118

The sides are forgetting something, possibly something important.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34474816

“I can live with random messages on my arm-“ Virgil started to say something but Logan continued before he could: “And I can kind of tolerate wearing eyeliner at 13 through 16, even if that caused me a lot of distress, embarrassment, and anxiety. “Wasn’t it like that for everyone at 13 through 16 though?”Remus asked. “I can even tolerate the unexplainable black lipstick on my cheek-“ “I-“

Logan held up a finger, “but purple hair?! You’ve crossed a line“ “Seriously?”Virgil scoffed, “that’s where you draw the line? Are you crazy or something?” “Black lipstick?”Roman asked realizing, “Remus what did you do?” Soulmate AU: When you draw on yourself, dye your hair or wear makeup, Or get a tattoo, It will be copied onto your soulmate.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34187218/chapters/85781869#workskin

Logan abruptly woke up, breath caught in his throat and he couldn't shake the very vivid images of Virgil's eyes glazing over as a shallow last breath left him, and he pushed himself up into a sitting position.

His eyes fell on the figure of his boyfriend next to him, and his hands were on Virgil trying to shake him awake because his brain kept reeling with thoughts of how Virgil might actually be hurt, and the image of Virgil dying would not leave him.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34442629

"The crush I've had on you for the past several months has become incredibly inconvenient to me!" Logan said sharply, a frown on his face and arms tightly crossed over his chest as he glared at Virgil.

Virgil just stood there staring at Logan for maybe twenty seconds, slowly comprehending what he had just been told. He had about one million thoughts in his head and no functioning voice at that moment and he opened his mouth only to close it again.

"What?" He finally said, it was the best he could come up with for now.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34418242

"I don't know what you are talking about." Logan said, sounding so sincere that Virgil almost doubted himself. Then he shook those thoughts away. He knew something was up, just not what that something was.

"Logan." He said, one second away from begging. Logan gave him a pleading look, sighing deeply when realizing Virgil was not going to back down.

"I would rather not talk about it." He said.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34405945

"Okay, so... You know how there is this person that I like a lot?" Virgil said, nervously clasping his hands together and letting them rest in his lap. Logan snorted.

"Yes, you won't stop talking about him. About how pretty his eyes are and how cute he is when he rambles." Logan said, the slightest tone of annoyance detectable. Virgil thought that was fair, Logan was really his only close friend and, well, he'd needed to gush about his crush to someone.

Even if that someone was actually the same that person he was crushing on. Virgil had not thought that fact was necessary for Logan to know. Not until now, perhaps.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34313917

"What were you looking at?" Patton asked, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. Virgil repressed a sigh, he'd brought paper towels for a reason, and he hated doing the laundry. Virgil had to do a lot of laundry with two five year olds.

"It's nothing, Pat. Now why don't you continue to play with Roman, eh?" Virgil tried, putting a hand on Patton's back and attempting to nudge him back towards the playground.

"Are you staring at that boy?" He heard Roman gasp from behind him and he tensed. Oh no. He turned around to shush Roman, but the five year old was already running towards the man Virgil had been looking towards.

Oh no.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34288090/chapters/85311628#workski

"Betrayed by my closest friend! I am surrounded by traitors. There's no one I can trust." Roman cried out and gave Patton a look of pure heartbreak.

"I said I'm sorry!" Patton said, looking just as distraught and heartbroken. Virgil turned to Logan and rolled his eyes, receiving a tired nod as a response.

"How could you do this to me?" Roman continued, looking as if he might actually cry.

"Just pick your four cards up so we can keep playing." Logan said, and Roman did so, but while pouting.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34278352

He heard shuffling in the doorway, turning his head that way and seeing Virgil standing there wrapped in one of his favorite blankets. At first they started at each other, and then he stomped into the room, towards Logan without looking at him. Not until he was standing right by the couch. Logan raised his brows as Virgil glared at him angry as he climbed on top of him, clumsily lying down.

"Shut up, jerkface." Virgil muttered and Logan coughed a bit, just having gotten an elbow into his ribcage as Virgil wasn't being too careful as he was trying to find a comfortable way to lie.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34261162

Virgil rang Logan's doorbell to pick his boyfriend up for their date but was met with an unexpected sight.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34188325

He forced himself up from the couch, entering the kitchen where he found a distressed two year old sitting in his baby chair by the table, an upside down bowl of baby food in front of him, and leaning against the kitchen counter was his husband, helplessly staring at their son.

Their eyes meet, only for a few seconds, and Virgil couldn't exactly read Logan's expression, and Logan turned away before Virgil could even try figuring out Logan's current feelings. Logan walked straight out of the room, and a few moments later Virgil heard the front door shut, hard.

He didn't blame Logan for leaving. There had been once or twice when Virgil had been too overwhelmed with Patton's screaming to stand it, having to leave the room or step outdoors for a moment to breathe and calm down. Plus the infinite amount of times he'd have to escape a situation at other points in life.

No, Virgil understood Logan fully, and all he wanted was to run after him to make sure he was doing alright, but he had a screaming two year old to calm down first, Logan would sadly have to wait.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34187023

Logan: So what's the big deal about people's dreams? Deceit: Asked the logical boy that dreamed of the goth boy. Logan: Oh, man... that was... private.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34186855

based on that tumblr post that goes something along the lines of:

character a: *has a bad day* character b: ... character a: don't do it, you better not do it character b: *smiles* character a, now smiling:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34184926

#analogical #sander sides #logan sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #patton sanders #remus sanders #janus sanders #thomas sanders

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luminous-shifting-vibes · 3 years

Text

actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server

out of context of course, what do you take me for? a sane person?

"they made lightning mcqueen hot"

"inch resting"

"Nix: Cars (2006) several people are typing..."

"im evaporating"

"enjoy precipitation"

"tow mater is more attractive than lightning mcqueen/hj"

"lightning mcqueen looks like he would call me a slur"

"why did I come back to a discussion regarding the attractiveness of vehicles"

"lark is the braincell of shiftblr tbh"

"you all need some grass in your life"

"me over here simping for block men and now literal cars"

"didn't nick wilde commit fraud canonically"

"i have no strong opinions on whether or not nick wilde is attractive"

"I AM AROMANTIC AND I AM NOT IMMUNE TO NICK WILDE"

"I am bisexual and I. Am not into Nick Wilde based on a simple fact he looks like he will drink all my pepsi and call me names"

"What is shiftbkr but not a bunch of simps"

"cries in Bianca Monroe"

"listen i have a folder called gayass

it is mostly pictures of kyoka jiro and virgil sanders"

"Nick Wilde x Reader where he steals your car 📷 carjacker to lovers AU 📷"

"he says "mama i like to step on keyboard""

"MY MOM JUST WALKED IN AND I HAD TO TELL HER I WAS LOOKING AT LIGHTING MC QUEEN HUMAN FANART"

"crab walks away"

""Y/N..." Nick whispered into your ear. "Your car...is a Honda Civic, right?" You looked up at Nick with a baffled expression. "Nick, my beloved? Whatever are you talking about?" "Just asking..." He said as he let you out of his embrace. "Hey, wanna see a magic trick, babe?" Your eyes sparkled. "Really, Nick? Of course!" Nick smiled. "Ok, close your eyes!" You giggled and closed your eyes, waiting for Nick to tell you to open up. Instead, you heard the loud rumble of a car starting up, and you open your eyes. Nick has stolen your car, and he has driven off into the sunset..."

"did y'all know his name used to be canonically Montgomery--he changed it to lightning mcqueen to get rid of his past"

"That is my exit number"

"cars trauma arc"

"wait do y'all know about car jesus" "as if jesus wasn't a ford focus in the bible"

"oh yall do not want to know about the trauma in my cars dr lmao"

"Dewit tau style babey make Lightning McQueen outlive everyone and stalk their reincarnations"

"Do they baptize other cars in like gasoline then"

"there is a pope car in the cars universe which means car jesus died for cars sins"

"NOT THE BOOMER MEMES"

"-lays facedown on the floor while caramelldansen plays-"

"like im serious how many of you guys endorse me falling face down on my floor" (NOT THE SAME PERSON AS PREVIOUS QUOTE)

"I will be Tall and no one can stop me"

"is a soft floor?"

"stop I thought faceplant meant like a succulent in the shape of a face instead of falling onto your noggin for a solid 10 seconds"

"Touch some grass??? What about eating grass"

"what if for every employee of the month i just printed out really horrible boomer memes"

"what ab smoking grass /j"

"Can the grassdirt smoothie be a special in the cafe"

"PLEASE IM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR REWRITINH THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE WHIKE SPEEDRUNINT MINECRAFT"

"you have to get good dirt from like the middle of a pennsylvanian forest for it to taste good though"

"I ate a four leaf clover as a kid cause i thought it would make me lucky"

"guys how do i see the mee6 leaderboard"

"I used to think i was half dragon and I ate plants out of sidewalk cracks"

"i think i punched someone"

"my parents told me to stop doing that so I looked at them and ate a flower"

"I ate grass when I was 9 bc I read warrior cats and thought I was a medicine cat ....................."

"bees are just spicy flies"

"I had a mental breakdown when I was three cause I didn’t know how to turn off a phone"

"My mom drank a bee once"

"when I was a baby I kinned ink sans."

"bro who here find the yellow hat man from curious george fine as heck 📷📷📷"

"mY LUNGSSSSSS"

"no one topping Him"

"I like em big"

"I think Moto Moto has no game like move over hunky boy I could beat you 1v1 Roblox Arsenal 📷📷📷"

"If you didnt have a crush on springtrap, jeff the killer, or Underfell/Gaster/Error sans don't talk to me /j"

"LOOK THEY'RE BOTH DILFS WITH ABS THAT WOULD FIGHT GOD"

"ZORO IS BANNED"

"Guys please help I found my old fnaf fanart from when I was 8 I'm in literal tears"

"OH NO BOT MY FIFTH GRADE HAMILTON PHASE"

"The worst attraction ive ever had has to be Sombra Overwatch"

"My family is like "save all ur art so I can sell it when you're famous" I literally could not sell this if I tried"

"screaming puppet"

"I just remembered Ive drawn overwatch/hamilton crossover fanart"

"my hermit crabs ate each other again"

"we're cannibals ????"

"having me here is a curse you have inflicted on yourselves and I for one am glad for it <3" "scitters around like a crab in anticipation"

"CARB DAY"

"WE NEED TO HAVE A WATCH OARTY"

"hey y'all ill be right back i have to throw away a crab carcass"

"if I watch cars I'm going to start laughing in the middle of it nonstop just because the word cars is funny and also cars are funny like how do you move silly little metal box with rubber circles"

"Lark asleep post catboy pitbul"

"Mwista Wowldwide! Nya!" "hermit crab 2: electric boogaloo"

"Is that why your name is chaos"

"manifest the crab power!!"

"cool dex fact: i can't read 📷"

"sighs adds to worship these entities list"

"with a knife <3"

"yeah and if he betrays me I could probably throw him across the atlantic ocean"

"give me his eyes"

"my good citizen i am a- wait no im nonbinary nvm"

"it worked on a fish idk what to tell you"

"what is gender??? Is that a board game?? If so can I be apples to apples that one's my favorite"

"CHUTES AND LADDERS"

"anyways actually my gender is Candyland"

"Oh god romes the destroyer of friendships/j"

"i am a simple gay i see math i run in the opposite direction survival instincts 101"

"math my beloathed"

"algebra makes me want to rip open a bag of swedish fish and swallow them whole"

"cackles in they're au characters and this will be very fun"

"pog !!!! me too ksajgks one of my drs is a sanders sides au"

"Is that bipper"

"tumblr sexyman"

"Good because he’ll fuck u up if u hurt a child"

"I want a wing-suit"

"looks like a bean would poison someone"

"my hermit crabs are cannibals what can i say"

"sonic the hedgehog kinnie"

"get yourself a man who is capable of the most ungodly actions but won't do them because of their morality owo"

"tell him he can steal my wallet"

"eyes"

"idk about y'all but I need blueberry sweet tea to live"

"y'know the red souls from soul eater i really want to eat those"

"but like only respectable crimes like stealing from elon musk"

"You can go cultbashing with he!"

"He acts like a flamboyant gay man, but if a flamboyant gay man was straight."

"Simp Satan 📷"

"definitely arson"

"They look like they enjoy lemon squares and other lemon desserts"

"Satan is all-powerful but he spends most of his time building honeymoon locations because he is convinced that the protag loves him"

"bc shes the reincarnation of his dead wife or something i guess"

annd here's a quote from our very own dream (@shiftingwastaken) that sums this post up:

"shiftblr but context makes it worse"

#not shifting #shitpost #out of context #tw cannibalism #tw stealing #tw poison #tw swearing #tw: drugs #tw: smoking #tw: death

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wisherbysharlight · 4 years

Text

Adrenaline Rush of Admitting a Crush

Word Count: 1622 Ships:Prinxiety, mentioned Pintroverts AO3: here Thanks to @vintagesquid for the beta! Description: Spoilers for FWSA! Virgil can’t wait. He just can’t. He needs to do this now, but there are limits to even the adrenaline high of bravery...

Roman is right there. And he’s smiling, and dancing around the room, and squealing in a way he hadn’t in months, if not a year, and Virgil has to say something.

“Do you need to pee?”

He can’t stop shaking his hands, bouncing in place. He’s hearing Roman spouting off ideas left and right, sees his delighted expression, and,

“Are you sure you don’t need to pee?”

Virgil can’t wait. He just can’t. He needs to do this now, but there are limits to even the adrenaline high of bravery. As impatient as he is, he has to wait for Thomas to not be paying attention to them.

All this energy, all these emotions, all this bravery, he has to do it now, before he loses the adrenaline high, but of course Thomas still needs them. He still needs to run back through the entire scenario at least five times, to check and double check and triple check that it actually happened. Virgil can’t fault him for that, hell, he wants it all too.

But Roman.

Roman is right there. And he’s smiling, and dancing around the room, and squealing in a way he hadn’t in months, if not a year, and Virgil has to say something.

Finally, finally, Thomas goes upstairs to change, claiming to try to use some of his nervous energy for a run. They won’t be summoned again for a bit, most likely, and they’re safe to sink out into the mindspace’s version of the living room. No one else is around, and this is it, this is his moment, he can do this, he squares his shoulders and he looks at Roman and he opens his mouth and-

“You don’t have to say it Virgil,” Roman says before the sound can leave Virgil’s mouth, “I know. I won’t tell the others about,” he waves his hand vaguely at Virgil’s eyes, “sparkle city, or whatever, until you’re ready. I know you, worry. Heh. About the whole ‘emo nightmare’ reputation.”

Virgil’s shaking his head furiously before Roman can even get his whole sentence out, the shadows under his eyes darkening in concern, “No, Roman, they- if they don’t know already I don’t care if they do now. I’m excited, it happens, no use trying to hide it.”

Roman looks concerned at the change, taking a hesitant step towards him without seeming to think too much about it before stopping himself, “Then - then what’s up, Legion of Gloom?” “I wanted to talk to you. About today. And. And tell you that I- shit, I am terrible at this. How did Thomas do it?” Virgil grumbles, feeling his face flame up and sparing a thought to be grateful for his foundation. He has to break eye contact because looking straight at Roman is not helping, “Ok listen. I wasn’t going to say anything. I really wasn’t. But Roman, today. You said - you said a couple things that … that set off alarm bells for me, and I just - I feel like I need to tell you this so just let me get it all out before you say anything.”

Roman nods mutely, but his hands are still restless, still moving and grabbing onto each other then onto his sash then to his belt loops.

“Ok. Ok so, I’ve noticed. Recently. That you have been a little. Ugh, shit, what’s the word. I should’ve practiced this better. I’ve noticed you’ve been a little, uh, insecure? And I just wanted, no. No I needed you to know that I see everything you do and how hard you’ve been trying. How much you want to be right. I’ve been there, Princey, and it’s not a fun place to be. But Roman. Just. Know I see you, and that ... that you can trust me to be honest with you. About my feelings. Because god knows I don’t talk about them often. And Ro? I really, honestly, care about you. Seeing you happy today? Knowing that I, me, I myself was able to do that for you? Well. It forced me to acknowledge something I’d been trying very hard to ignore.”

Roman looks absolutely shell-shocked, eyes wide as saucers, mouth hanging open a bit, hands now twisting his sash between them, face flushed almost as red as his emblem. He drops the sash when Virgil stops talking, gesturing wildly at him, voice clearly on the verge of breaking, “What is it? Don’t leave a man in suspense, Virgil, a story like that cannot be left unfinished.” Virgil huffs out a laugh, fidgeting with the zipper on his sleeve, “You would be focused on the story, dramatic ass.” He huffs again, then stares up at the ceiling, “Roman, I- If I could make you smile like that. You- God you’re just so good Roman, and for a long time I think I was denying ... that I could ever be enough. But if I could do that, today, for you, for Thomas. Well. I think I can try. To be enough. And to let myself want to be-”

Virgil’s voice dies in his throat as Roman’s thumb gently presses on his chin, tilting his head down - when had he even moved that close - and oh. He’s smiling, that brilliant smile that Virgil was worried was reserved just for Nico - “Virgil. I was also concerned. About being. Enough. For you.”

“Well that’s stupid,” Virgil bursts out, then feels his face flame up and theres no way his foundation is enough to cover that. “Because. Because.”

“Because we’re both a bit stupid?” Roman grins, and his thumb moves slightly from where it’s still on his chin, the rest of his hand cupping his cheek, and that feels really nice. Maybe Virgil leans into it a bit, feels that light tingle under his eyes that means his shadow is shifting and fights the urge to sink out and hide it, “And maybe we are both enough? Or rather, that we balance each other quite nicely?” Virgil nods, and idly wonders when he became the mute one in this conversation, and where all this suaveness had been when they were trying to woo Nico, but those thoughts fly out the window when Roman’s thumb brushes feather-light over his bottom lip, “And maybe? We could try to explore how well we work together? As a team, and as more?”

Virgil knows he’s gone full-lavender at this point as he nods, careful not to dislodge Roman’s thumb. He leans in, feeling even braver than when he had shoved Thomas earlier, bolstered even more by the urge to assuage the doubt still hiding in Roman’s eyes, but still slow in case he’s wrong (oh god, what if he’s wrong), but Roman surges forward, capturing his lips and holding onto his face with both hands. Virgil even doesn’t know what to do with his own hands, he’s so happy he can’t possibly keep them still, so he just holds onto Roman’s shoulders, then his arms, then his hair (oh soft hair that’s a good place to stay), and lets Roman take the lead.

Virgil notices a moment later that Roman’s humming, and it doesn’t feel intentional, which makes him grin into the kiss and causes Roman to start laughing, and then they’re both off. They’re leaning into each other still, but Virgil’s hands are flapping on either side of Roman and Roman’s bouncing on the balls of his feet and neither of them can stop giggling long enough to even say anything. They just exist in each others’ spaces, giggling just like before, only this time Virgil can smell the mint from Roman’s breath, can see the sparkle in his eye, and it makes him feel like he can take on the world.

Eventually, Roman quiets enough to speak, though he’s still grinning like a loon, “So, I guess I have to start thinking of fun pet names instead of just plain nicknames, huh Hot Topic?” “I knew you thought I was hot,” Virgil croons back without missing a beat, feeling less off kilter with his trademark smirk, though he knows his shadow still betrays the levity in his entire being.

Roman leans in to kiss him again, and their laughter returns when Virgil is caught off guard enough by Roman nipping at his lip that he stumbles. ‘You’re supposed to be alert, Virgil. Get back on your game.’ the nasty voice that sounds a lot like his own from the past hisses in his ear, but is drowned out quickly when Roman swoons dramatically and coos, “Oh Virgil I knew you’d fall for me eventually.”

“I’ll show you falling,” Virgil growls playfully, pushes Roman to the couch and straddles him, getting his hands back in that soft hair and pulling him up for another kiss, then another, and another, each only to be interrupted when one of them gets so overwhelmed they squirm, or squeak, or hum, or flap, and they dissolve into laughter again, like they have all the time in the world.

At some point, they’ll have to debrief the other sides on the particulars of what went down at the mall food court today. They’ll discuss Janus being overworked and exhausted and in everyone else’s business, and address Patton’s suspicious absence in a matter of the heart, and assist Logan with his inevitable sulking about yet another emotional connection to maintain, and deal with Remus’ certainly ever-growing list of new material featuring that new connection.

Eventually, they, Roman and Virgil, would have to address their insecurities in a less indirect manner, and actually talk through them to make sure neither one was rushing in blind. It all needed to happen, but later. For now, with just the two of them here on the couch, Virgil couldn’t bring himself to fear any of it, even though it was all residing in the back of his mind.

Bravery. Huh. He could get used to that.

#prinxiety #roman sanders #virgil sanders #fwsa #flirting with social anxiety #stimmy virgil #stimmy roman #look at me writing canon fic who AM i #my writing

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brother-lipsmackariah · 3 years

Text

"Wait, you like me?"

Ts x Sides Day 4:

@tsxsides @thomasxsides

Pairings: Romantic Thomality, platonic LAMPT

Characters: Character Thomas, Patton Sanders, Virgil Sanders. Background Roman, Remus, Janus and Logan.

Other tags: Fluff, crushes, Patton in cute makeup, confessions and all that comes with it

Warnings: I don't think any warnings apply but let me know

Thomas drummed his fingers against his thigh, barely paying attention to whatever video he was watching on his phone. Patton had come up to him in the morning, asking if they could have another movie night, practically pleading with those cartoonishly large eyes. And who was Thomas to deny his heart? It would be a good idea,he had thought at the time. They hadn’t spent time together in weeks, except when the Sides came together to help him with his dilemmas. It was a good way to make the others feel accepted and part of the group after years of rejection. It also offered him a chance to finally say he something he had been planning on months. There was never a right time, except now there was.

It had not been a good idea. Thomas was alone in the living room, waiting for everyone to show up and sure enough, Virgil appeared next to him and took a seat. Having Virgil with him actually did more to calm his nerves than Thomas would have imagined. After all, all Virgil was the only one who knew what Thomas planned to do tonight. He put a firm hand on Thomas’s knee, causing him to stop bouncing his leg.

“You okay?” asked Virgil.

“Yup,” lied Thomas.

“Yes, I can feel how okay you are,” he remarked wryly and removed his hand. “Thomas, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” And Thomas knew that, of course he did. It wasn’t life or death. It wasn’t an obligation. But again, wasn’t it though?

“No, I want to tell him. I just don’t know what I will do if he doesn’t…reciprocate.”

“A, you won’t know that unless you ask. B, what’s the worst that could happen? That he might like you the way you want to? You know Patton is never going to stop loving you.” Virgil shifted. “You know the last thing I want to do is pressure you ,Thomas, but it has been painful watching your pining. I believe you should get it over with.”

Thomas snorted. “Rip it off like a bandage?”

“Would you rather use Princey or Logan’s methods?” challenged Virgil. Thomas’s mind filled with dozens of images, of all the ways he could he could ask out Patton. He thought back to the day and decided he was not going to kill a dragon as a part of some grand gesture. How would he even find a dragon. Or worse, ask Patton to copulate with him, dear God. He shuddered.

“Thought so,” said Virgil. “Now relax, Patton’s coming.”

“How do you know?”

He didn’t answer, walking up to the door. As if on cue, Patton rose up there, along with Roman and Logan. They were holding each of his hands and Thomas frowned. Virgil was quick to steal him away, muttering “I’ll take it from here”. Patton laughed but followed him. Thomas thought he was going to find them the furthermost corner but instead he brought Patton to Thomas, saying they should sit together tonight, not so subtly giving him a Look. The same look the other two sides were giving him. He blushed. Thomas did not appreciate being treated like a doll in a little girl’s Barbie game but he didn’t have the energy or heart to say so. And after all, wasn’t this what he wanted.

He blushed even more when he got a real look at Patton. He was wearing his usual cat onesie but his face was littered with fake stars and clouds and the prettiest blush. He had light pink lip-gloss on and small fruit earrings dangling on each side. They should have looked ridiculous with everything else but Patton had a way of making silly look enticing. Thomas looked away, afraid if he kept staring he would never be able to stop.

“Pat,” said Thomas. “You look…nice.”

Patton lit up at his compliment, smiling brightly. “Thanks! Roman and Logan offered to do my make-up,” he gushed. “Isn’t it lovely?” Thomas almost expected him to a twirl.

“Really?” He raised his eyebrows at Logan.

“I merely suggested the stars,” clarified Logan.

“And they ended up completing the look,” said Roman. “Don’t sell yourself short, Specs.”

Thomas smiled at that. It pleased him to know his Sides still hung out even after their job was done. He only wished he was part of their world. Janus and Remus came in not long after and the rest of the night was a blur. He wasn’t really watching the movie to be honest, head filled with the anticipation of what he planned to do tonight. It could go wrong in so many ways. Or it could go so, so right and then what? It didn’t help that Patton was sitting SO close to him, slowly moving even closer.

One moment he was watching Pagemaster and the next he was waking up Patton shaking up. He blinked.

“Hey, Thomathy,” said Patton, in his “good morning” tone. It wasn’t morning, was it? He looked around and no one else was there. “Uh, yeah. They all left,” Patton explained. “You fell asleep pretty early, Tommy. Were you that tired?”

“I guess,” shrugged Thomas. He wouldn’t be surprised if he was.

‘Welp, I gotta go now,” Patton said. “It’s late and I think you should go to bed too.” He started to sink down. I guess this is my chance.

“Patton, wait!”

The moral side popped back up. “Yeah?”

Thomas hesitated. “I..uh…I was wondering if I could come with you tonight.”

“With me?’

“Yes. To your room.”

“My room?” Patton stepped closer to him. “Thomas, do you not remember the last time you were there? I don’t want you to get lost in the nostalgia again.”

“That’s not going to happen this time,” said Thomas, with certainty. “I’m not going to get lost because I am not looking to escape anything.” In a moment of boldness, he took Patton’s hand. “I just…want to spend more time with you Patton. I feel like we haven’t been doing that since the wedding debacle.” But he started to let go. “If you don’t want to...”

“No!” Patton was quick to take his hand back. “Of course I want to spend time with you.” And that was that.

-------------------------------------------------------

Patton’s room was different than he remembered. Well, for one, it actually looked a bedroom instead of a Kidz Bop version of his living room. It felt different, too. Still very happy, nostalgic, but less intense. Less overwhelming.

Patton had changed into more comfortable, sleepy-time clothes with a snap. Thomas was relieved to know that they had different clothes and not just different versions of the same outfit like a cartoon character. He had then then proceeded to give Thomas a little “tour”, excitedly telling him all the things that had changed and the new memories that were added to his room. Even though Thomas was surrounded by Patton, quite literally, every single in this room belonged to Thomas. Because Patton was his heart and he was incapable on letting go anything Thomas cherished. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“I love you!” Thomas blurted out. Then quickly covered his mouth. He hadn’t meant to say it so soon, without easing Patton into this.

Patton blinked at him. “I love you too, silly.”

Thomas sighed. “No, Pat, I love you. As in, I want to hold you and kiss your face for hours.” And there it was.

“Oh,” said Patton, voice conveying very little emotions. Everything in him was telling Thomas to get out of here and forget this ever happened. Pray that Patton would forget it too. “Wait, you like me!”

Thomas frowned. “Uh, yes, that’s what I said. Look, I am sorry. We can pretend I never said that.” Please don’t let this change things I have only just got you back I can’t lose you again.

“That’s why the others were so…weird,” continued Patton, like Thomas hadn’t said anything. “The looks they were giving us. Why roman insisted he should do my make-up, like he was getting me ready for a date. All the times Virgil insisted that I wasn’t wrong for feeling this way. You like me!”

“I love you,” corrected Thomas. Patton threw away whatever stuffed toy he was holding and attacked Thomas with a hug.

“I love you too!” He exclaimed. “You need to know that I will love in whatever you want me too, Thomas. Oh, I’m so happy can I kiss you?”

Thomas went red. “Yes, please.”

Patton took his face in his hands, giving him a quick, gentle, unbearably soft kiss. It was over too soon, and Thomas a little disappointed but it was overshadaowed by all the joy he was feeling now. It was everything Thomas had imagined it would be.

“So,” started Thomas. “What now?”

“Let’s just go to sleep for now,” Patton smiled. “We have all the time in the world to discuss what this means."

#enjoy this very rushed and unplanned fic #Thomas #Patton #Thomality #Sanders Sides #Character Thomas #C!Thomas #Pattmas #Thomas x Patton #Thomas x Sides #Ts x Sides #Patton Sanders #Virgil Sanders #background sides #romantic Thomality #sanders sides fic #my writing

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logically-asexual · 3 years

Text

Hold me like you mean it

summary:

Logan’s feelings for Virgil and the fact that now Virgil barely notices him are stopping him from getting any work done. Janus offers a way for Logan to cope, by disguising himself into Anxiety. but is this really what Logan needs? and what’s in it for Janus, anyway?

alternatively, an angsty story about rejection, denial, and manipulation.

warnings: (for the whole fic) unrequited love, rejection, manipulation, unhealthy relationships, gaslighting, dependency, dubious consent and non consent for kissing, sad ending, depression (vaguely described), angst in general, nightmares. let me know what else i should add.

Read on AO3

Chapter 2

| Previous | | Next |

words: 1146

before starting: if second-hand embarrassment is too painful for you, you can skip this chapter lol. i struggle with it and writing this was An Experience (but i found it hilarious so). you can check the notes at the end of the post for a quick summary of what happened.

The following day Logan began taking his plan into action. He made sure to be supportive of Virgil’s contributions, while gently reasoning against some of his wildest arguments when it was necessary. He was very careful with his words, trying not to insult the Side in any way, and to remind him subtly that he appreciated him. Logan also tried glancing at Virgil when the more enthusiastic Sides said something amusing, in hopes of Virgil smiling back and sharing an unspoken agreement with him about the others’ unnecessary outbursts. He didn’t fully succeed, for Virgil didn’t explicitly acknowledge any of his attempts. However, he seemed slightly more relaxed around Logan than the previous days, so he marked the day down as positive.

Later, Logan smiled to himself as he waited for the water on the stove to boil. He was preparing tea, as he usually did at this time, to help him start relaxing and get ready for bed. He also made sure to pour water for one extra mug, which he would take to Virgil. If everything went well, Virgil would allow him into his room and they would converse while they drank their tea, but he would be satisfied even if he only accepted it and returned to his isolation.

Now that the water was hot enough, he turned to turn the stove off and poured it into the mugs. As he did, he heard familiarly cautious steps enter the kitchen behind him. He turned around and, as expected, found Virgil standing close to the counter.

“Hello, Virgil,” he said, with a low volume. “How have you been today?”

“Hey.” he replied with a small nod. “I’m alright, thank you.”

Logan believed him, his body language conveyed calm and security. He was slouched over, as usual, but his hoodie was open, his jaw wasn’t clenched and his fingers weren’t fidgeting. Logan couldn’t be sure if this was directly caused by his thoughtful actions earlier, but he considered it to be the most likely cause. After a moment, he remembered what he was doing and told Virgil about the tea, offering him a mug, which he accepted with a smile.

They both enjoyed their drink in comfortable silence. When Logan’s cup was halfway finished, he noticed Virgil had started fidgeting again, but he didn’t mention it, allowing him to voice his concern when he was ready.

Minutes later, Virgil set his mug on the counter and spoke.

“Hey, Lo. I noticed that you’ve been um... nicer... to me than usual. Is there a- a reason in particular?”

Logan felt his heart pick up speed. Did he exaggerate on his gestures? He had thought they were subtle enough, and didn’t expect Virgil to become suspicious of him so soon. He looked around the kitchen as he hurried to find the right words for his answer. He didn’t want to overwhelm the anxious Side, but maybe the best course of action was to tell the truth. At least as much of it as he was comfortable sharing. He carefully put his own mug next to the other, avoiding eye contact with Virgil.

“I have mentioned before that I don’t mind your company. Since you’ve been isolating yourself lately I thought I could remind you of that, and demonstrate that you could reach out to me, if you wanted.”

Logan adjusted his tie nervously as Virgil studied him. “You… really care that much about me?”

“Well, yeah. I-” he interrupted himself when Virgil took a step forward.

“How much?”

“I’m sorry?”

“I hate guessing games, Logan. How much do you care?” Virgil sounded determined as he got closer and closer, cornering Logan into the counter.

“I… well, I consider you a- a friend-” He felt his face warm up as Virgil rested a hand on his cheek.

“Just a friend?” Virgil looked at him with a surprisingly shy expression in his eyes, despite how tall he was standing and how close he was leaning on him.

Logan’s words died on his tongue as their noses touched. Nervousness coulded his thinking, yet he found himself enjoying Virgil’s touch. Logan took a deep breath to calm himself, and met Virgil’s gaze, who held eye contact for a second before looking down at his lips. Virgil leaned impossibly closer, but not enough yet. Logan closed his eyes and tilted his face slightly forward, but before his mouth could meet the other’s, Virgil pulled away.

He opened his eyes and saw Virgil hunched down… laughing? It started small but gradually he stopped trying to contain it, the uncharacteristic loudness unsettling Logan even more.

“Oh, darling, you’re adorable.” He said, trying to catch his breath. “You should have seen your face!”

If Logan had felt warmth on his face earlier, now it was figuratively on fire, as he looked mortified at the other Side. His heart pounded in his chest and his thoughts raced trying to understand what was happening. Things began to make sense when Virgil’s appearance shifted, revealing Deceit behind the disguise.

“Janus?! What the hell are you doing?”

Janus’ cackling had died down to a soft chuckle after changing back, and he kept his wide grin as he replied. “What? Am I not allowed to have fun every once in a while? Everyone is so boring around here.”

Logan crossed his arms and stared at him sternly, waiting for Janus to admit his actual intentions.

“I wanted to prove a point.” He finally confessed. “Because apparently you weren’t aware of your own little crush.”

Logan faltered at Janus’ words, just now processing what he had been about to do before the shocking reveal. Was he really attracted to Virgil that way? No. This didn’t prove anything. Experiments need full control of all independent variables to draw conclusions about their effects on dependent variables, and Virgil being portrayed by another Side added too many possibilities into the situation that could have influenced Logan in unexpected ways. In addition, Logan had never been that close physically to any of the other Sides. Who knows if this faux-Virgil was the cause, or if events would have occurred similarly with any of the others. This wasn’t a valid experiment and it shouldn’t be considered as such.

“This doesn’t prove anything.” He mumbled. “Why do you care so much about this, in any case?”

“I care about you.” Janus said with a playful tone.

“Falsehood. You want something.”

“And what does it matter? You have a problem, and your idea of a solution is frankly pathetic, as if you could gain Anxiety’s trust back with passive gestures in only a few days. You need me, and I am happy to oblige.”

There was a silent pause while Logan hugged himself and avoided looking Janus in the eye. A moment later Janus told him to think about it and left, once again leaving him all alone.

| Previous | | Next |

notes:

summary: logan acted on his plan and was extra kind to virgil. janus disguised as virgil and went to logan to pretend he liked him back, almost kissing him, but before logan could kiss virgil janus revealed himself and made fun of logan (hence the embarrassment). logan still refuses to believe he has a crush on virgil and janus refuses to admit his motive behind wanting to help him.

thank you for reading! <3

#virgil sanders #logan sanders #janus sanders #analogical #loceit #unrequited crush #unhealthy relationships #toxic relationship #manipulative relationship #manipulation #angst #thomas sanders #sanders sides #hold me like you mean it

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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 4 years

Text

Snap Part 2

Read on Ao3 Part 1 Part 3 Part 4

Warnings: roman angst and everything that goes with it. self-esteem issues, self-hatred, insecurity. sympathetic everyone

Pairings: roceit, platonic DLAMPR, platonic creativitwins

Word Count: 6113

Most things in life are flexible to some degree. You can push and pull and bend them in certain ways and, to some extent, they will comply with you. There are some things that you can bend and bend and bend. Creativity is one of these things. Creativity, imagination, dreams...they can be shaped and changed into whatever you want.

Bend...and bend...and bend...until they snap.

The first day is hard.

The first day isn’t having your entire worldview turned upside down. It’s worse. The first day isn’t being betrayed by the people you value most to the extent that it rips a hole in your sternum so deep it threatens to swallow you whole. It’s worse.

The first day isn’t realizing that the only reason you have your place, that you’re standing here right now is entirely based on how much you conform. It’s worse.

It’s knowing all of those things, suspecting them, having them whispered in your ear in the middle of the night, for years, and being proved right all at once.

Roman slumps against the wall, not bothering to fix the way it’s ripping the back of his costume up in shreds. He doesn’t deserve to wear the damn thing anyway. He’s no prince. He’s no knight. He’s not even the squire.

He’s no hero.

He’s never really been a hero, though, has he?

He throws his head back with a silent scream, his jaw aching from the weight of it, his head thunking against the wall.

Nothing. That’s what he’s worth now. Nothing.

He gave up the callback for nothing.

He gave up his dreams, Thomas’s dreams, for nothing.

He stuck his neck out for J—for Deceit for nothing.

He doesn’t deserve to say or even think his name. Not after what he’s done.

Roman’s lips curl up in a smile; a horrible, bitter thing that stings the corners of his mouth and threatens to burn his cheeks.

What Roman’s done…he’d tried so hard.

For them.

The worst part, Roman thinks as he buries his hands in his hair, pulling hard enough to bring tears to his eyes, is they actually think I believe it.

They think he believes in only black and white. They think he genuinely believes Deceit is evil. They think Roman is crushed, throwing his temper tantrum, because Thomas told him he’s not as important as he thinks he is.

Patton is the heart. Patton is feelings. Patton is Morality.

Thomas likes Patton. Thomas listens to Patton. Thomas will always listen to Patton.

So Roman listened to Patton.

Patton likes—well, Roman sniffs, after today, who knows—black and white thinking. There is a right and there is a wrong. There is a good and there is a bad. There is a hero and there is a villain. So Roman tried his best to be the prince, to be the hero, to be good for Thomas. So Thomas could believe that good dreams can come true.

Logan is the problem solver. Logan is the intelligent one. Logan is Logic.

Thomas likes Logan too. He respects Logan in a way that speaks volumes more than the offhanded compliments he tosses Roman’s way on occasion. Thomas will always, always try and make room for Logan in a conversation, even if it doesn’t always go as planned.

So Roman tried to be better to Logan.

Logan is clever, beyond clever, and respects people that can keep up with him. So Roman keeps up with him, challenging him to get him to talk, to explain, to teach. Logan enjoys teaching, enjoys talking. And why shouldn’t he? He’s good at it. So Roman tried to make sure that if nothing else, he was the one that Logan could always teach.

Virgil is the protector. Virgil is the caution. Virgil is Anxiety.

Thomas didn’t always like Virgil. In fact, he told Roman that it was one of his dreams to get rid of Virgil. So Roman tried to do what Thomas wanted, treated Virgil like a villain, because that’s what was asked of him. But then Virgil had ducked out and now…now Roman was supposed to like Virgil. And he was confused because wasn’t this…not supposed to happen? But Thomas wanted Virgil.

So Roman did his best to make up for what he did to Virgil.

Virgil is fight or flight, always on guard, and needs a level of security to feel safe. So Roman tried his best to give that to Virgil, to be consistent, to help protect Thomas, to push for things that would help make Thomas feel safer. And…and if anything, it gave Virgil an answer. When Thomas’s dreams didn’t turn out the way he wanted, or a bump in a relationship made them all feel down, Roman gave Virgil an easy, consistent place to look for blame.

Roman lets out a whimper and presses his fingertips hard to his eyes as his hair falls in his face. He’d tried, he’d tried so hard to make them all happy, to do what needed to be done to make them happy, to please them. He tried so hard.

Then…then Deceit.

Roman doesn’t know what to do.

When Virgil first appeared, Roman was told that the Others were villains. So he treated Virgil like a villain.

Then Virgil ducked out and they all realized that wasn’t the case. So Roman didn’t treat Virgil like a villain, because that was unfair.

Then Deceit revealed himself to Thomas and Thomas didn’t like him. So Roman tried to keep him away from Thomas, called the Others the Dark Sides.

Then the news of the callback came and Roman wanted to go, he wanted to go so badly he ached from it, and Deceit wanted to go too. And Roman suggested they hear him out because it wasn’t fair to treat Deceit as automatically bad, because that’s not what they did with Virgil.

Then the other Sides tore him apart, spent the entire courtroom scene lauding about how Deceit was evil, that he wasn’t supposed to be here. Deceit dressed him up, not for the first time, stuck him in the judge’s seat with the gavel in his hand, giving Roman the final say. So Roman did what the others wanted and sent Thomas to the wedding.

Then…then Remus.

Roman doesn’t remember much of that day either, to tell the truth.

Ha.

He remembers rising up into the living room, being extremely confused, and then knocked out twice. First by his brother’s morning star, then by a casual flick of his fingers.

He remembers coming to and having everyone’s reaction be disgust. Hatred. Fear.

He remembers Thomas being so relieved that it was him, not Remus, and he remembers telling Thomas that Remus was everything he didn’t want to be. Thomas thought that meant vulgar, crass, shameless, twisted. It didn’t, but that’s what Thomas wanted to believe, so…Roman let him.

And now…now the wedding.

Roman whimpers involuntarily, scratching his arms until the fabric groans in protest. He’d messed up again. He’d messed up so many times.

He hadn’t said the right thing when Thomas and Patton had asked him. He hadn’t made the right choice with Logan—had he ever made the right choice with Logan?—and his information. He’d messed up by—by mocking Deceit’s name.

He’d messed up by saying 360 instead of 180.

Roman growls, throwing himself to his feet and pacing wildly, still tearing his costume to shreds as he goes, his hair hanging in front of his eyes, his movements growing more and more frantic.

He hadn’t misspoken. He’d said exactly what he wanted to say.

He wanted to go to the callback. He wanted to talk to Lee and Mary Lee about skipping the wedding. He wanted to listen to Deceit.

A pained howl tears itself from Roman’s throat and he all but collapses onto the floor, sobbing and still tearing the damned costume away from him.

He’d wanted, so many times, and he’d tried.

He wanted the romance, it was his job, and he failed, and Thomas is so unhappy that he failed, and Patton was so hurt that he failed, but when he tried to fix it, to get what he wanted, he was wrong. He was bad.

He wanted the callback, and yet one of the biggest reasons almost no one else did was because Thomas winning the callback was so unlikely. They thought Roman winning was unlikely.

He wanted his brother. He wanted Remus so badly. He wanted his brother back by his side, so they could work together again, they always worked better together, but Remus was taken away from him, because Remus was Bad and Roman was Good. And the only reason Roman was here is that he was Good.

Good.

Roman gasps, curled up on the floor of his room, his nails digging into his arms as bruises bloom across his body. He can’t even wince at the pain, can’t do anything other than gasp for breath around his sobs.

What is Roman if he isn’t good? What is Roman if he isn’t the hero?

Well, no.

What is Roman if Thomas doesn’t think he’s a hero?

Roman knows he’s not a hero. Heroes don’t mock people’s names in moments of vulnerability.

Guilt wells up in Roman’s chest, making him gasp. Hot and heavy tears trickle down his face, through his hair, sending him into another pathetic, blubbering stupor. He doesn’t deserve to feel guilty. He’s messed up. He’s been so cruel. And what kind of horrible person views being compared to their brother as the worst possible insult?

Although…it never really was about who Remus is, is it? Nor is it what Remus represents, not really.

Roman rolls over, no better than a wounded animal, yowling out for someone to help it, flinching as he lands on a new set of bruises. Being the hero is how he defined himself for so long…and now?

it’s not that he can’t compute non-black-and-white thinking, it’s that no one else cares that this is so important to him. Something that has caused him so much suffering is now being treated as insignificant and fickle by the same people that have enforced it on him for years. Because he has Remus around to show him how conditional everyone’s love really is and oh, wait, maybe it isn’t anymore.

Because after all, if he had a mustache…

Roman smiles again and laughs. It starts out low, a snort he tries to cover up. Then it bubbles up, frenzied, hysterical, and utterly humorless.

There really is no good twin, is there?

Remus doesn’t have this weakness, Roman thinks as he pushes himself unsteadily to his feet, his costume hanging from him in tatters. Remus is perfectly confident in who he is. Remus knows who he is. Remus isn’t bound by such weak and fickle labels like ‘good’ or ‘evil.’ Remus just needs to be listened to.

Not like Roman, who needs to be told every single time what to do, and even then he gets it wrong. Who sucks up attention and affection like a parasite, using it to sustain himself.

Because that’s who Roman is. Not the good twin, not the hero. The Ego.

Patton may be the Heart, but it’s Roman that needs love. Greedily forcing it out of every corner he can just to keep himself alive. He wants their love so he does what they want. He wants love so he plays by their rules. He wants love so he tries to be the hero.

Only to realize that, actually, he’s done a much better job of playing the villain.

Roman staggers toward the giant mirror in the corner. He winces when he sees his reflection. He’s hideous, covered in giant bruises and lacerations, panting from the pain and the exertion, hair a crazed mess. His destroyed prince costume hangs in rags, even his logo is mangled horrifically.

He doesn’t want to look like this.

He doesn't want to be the villain.

And yet, as he looks at his reflection, a tiny bitter smile comes to Roman’s face.

“When has it ever mattered,” he whispers to an empty room, “what I wanted?”

The second day is easier.

He actually spent so long in pain, lying on the floor, as his body did its best to beat itself to pieces, that he missed the moment the first day became the second. But the second is easier nonetheless.

He gets into the shower, barely allowing himself a flinch as the water instantly begins to steam. He scrubs his body inch by inch until he hasn’t left a single unmarred spot that isn’t glowing with pain. Then he turns the water cool and lets it wash over him, soothe away the sting, let him return to numbness.

He dresses slowly, putting on an old shirt and sweatpants, and drinks a glass of water. Then he drinks another one.

There is something comforting, Roman decides eventually as he pushes his hair out of his face, about realizing that he’s the villain.

He may not believe whole-heartedly in the pure black-and-white thinking, but he can’t deny it’s been…useful in shaping how he approaches problems. There’s something extremely reassuring about a simple story where good is good and bad is bad. He has endless plans and instructions for how to get the happy ending.

If you give him instructions, he will follow them.

He can’t tell the others this. He knows if he even so much as mentions the fact that he thinks he’s the villain one of two things will happen. Either they’ll coddle him, reassure him that he isn’t a villain, and try to explain to him in that gently frustrated way that there are no good guys or bad guys. Or they’ll see him as whiny and attention-seeking, muttering to themselves that maybe he is the bad guy.

Roman already thinks he is, thank you, no need for you to chime in too.

But he doesn’t need to tell them.

So. He’s the villain. He needs to figure out his redemption arc.

Step One: realize that he’s been wrong.

Been there, done that.

Step Two: apologize.

He’s…he’s done that before, but not the way he needs to. Not the way he knows he needs to now. That part’s going to be hard.

Step Three: show that he’s willing to change.

Of course he’s willing to change. He’s always been willing to change. He just…he just has to figure out what they want from him now.

He knows sort of what they want. He needs to take a step back, that’s for sure. Give Virgil less to stress about, let Remus be listened to, let Logan be listened to, give Patton time to figure things out for himself, take some pressure off Janus. He has to be more considerate, adapt his princely persona to be less…obnoxious. It was convenient before, but now…now the role has lost its appeal. He must craft a new one.

Well, it’s not like Roman’s a stranger to that.

And maybe…maybe this time…maybe he’ll figure out who Roman is.

He spends most of the day rehearsing his apologies. It isn’t hard to find the words; he’s tried to say this to so many of them, so many times. The hard part is knowing how much of himself to put into it. He knows if he just starts crying—which is the only thing he gets for the first…hour or so—it won’t work. So he runs his lines over and over, drills them into his head, then pulls out the Imagination and starts trying it in front of them. He’s set back an hour or so, just with…more crying, but eventually, he gets it to where he can at least make it through the apology and a few rounds of insults before he breaks down into a heap of tears.

He knows he has to be more open with them, that they’ll be suspicious. And they have a right to be. But he also knows that he can’t tell them the whole truth.

They won’t believe that either, or worse, they will.

So he drills himself on being able to speak about things like they’re in the past. Like he’s reading off a card. Halfway through he actually creates a deck of cards and uses them to help. It makes it so much easier and he makes a note to help Logan with his in future.

The third day wasn’t supposed to happen.

Roman was supposed to be finished by the second day. He was supposed to have all his apologies ready, his new persona, his peace offerings, everything was supposed to be finished. He was supposed to shrug on a new copy of his prince uniform, hiding all the unhealed bruises beneath, and walk out with his head held high—chin up or the crown slips.

That isn’t what happens.

What happens is he loses track of time in the Imagination.

What happens is a brand new smattering of bruises and scrapes interrupts his medical ritual and he has to start all over again.

What happens is he hadn’t noticed the others trying to get inside and so they go to the one thing he can’t refuse.

What happens is he gets summoned by Thomas and appears in the living room in all his bruised, battered glory.

“Ro—“ Thomas’s voice chokes off into a startled gasp. Roman winces, still holding a bandage to his side. This isn’t how he wanted this to go.

“…hey, Thomas.”

“What happened,” Thomas says, rushing forward, “did you, like, go on a quest or something?”

“No.” Roman winces when Thomas tries to reach out for him. “Easy.”

“Right, um, can you—“ Thomas glances behind him— “do you wanna sit down?”

“…what did you need?”

Thomas looks back at him. “What?”

Roman gestures to himself. “I was…in the middle of something, not that it particularly matters. I am simply curious as to why you summoned me.”

Thomas stares at him and the pure confusion in his face causes a fresh splattering of wounds across Roman’s back. He grits his teeth and raises his chin, shaking his hair out of his eyes.

“Tell me how I can help you,” he says, “and then I can go.”

Thomas mouths the last words with him, before his jaw sets and he holds his hand out. “Tell me what happened first.”

“Thomas—“

“Please, Roman?”

As you wish.

Roman sighs, the pressure on his ribs never decreasing as he tries to remember the explanation he’d prepared. “Surely the phrase ‘bruised ego’ is one that you’ve heard before.”

Thomas nods, his eyes still scanning up and down. Roman gestures to himself again.

“There you are, then.”

“W-what? But you—you’re…” Thomas’s eyes widen and Roman can tell the second he realizes what Roman’s trying to say by the way red and purple blooms on his cheek. “…oh Ro…”

“Please,” Roman coughs as another fist drives into his gut, “try—try not to think about it too much.”

“Is—is that why you look like you’ve—“

“Come out of a fistfight with a meat grinder? Precisely.” Another swipe across his jaw and he winces. “Ow.”

“Am I doing this to you? Am I hurting you…right now?”

“You’re not doing it purposefully,” Roman mutters, suddenly finding it quite difficult to stay standing.

“That’s not a no.”

Roman sighs. “Yes, Thomas, you’re hurting me. No, wait—“ he hisses through his teeth as the ensuing pain in his side threatens to collapse him entirely— “shit. Don’t—don’t beat yourself up over it.”

“No, apparently I’m just going to beat you up instead.”

Despite everything, Roman’s mouth quirks up the smallest bit. Patton would’ve liked that pun.

“The best way to help…not do that,” Roman manages, “is to get off this train of thought. Book another ticket. Leave the engine at the station.”

“Okay,” Thomas says, eyes still wide with concern, “uh, what should I think about instead?”

“Well,” Roman drawls—considering the circumstances, he’s quite impressed by how similar his voice is to his normal princely exterior--propping himself up on his knee, “why did you summon me?”

Thomas scratches the back of his head. “The others were worried. Said you’d shut yourself away, or you—you—“

Roman sighs. “You worried I’d ducked out.”

“…yeah.”

He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t considered it. But that would be cowardly.

Plus, Virgil’s already tried that. You can’t even be creative anymore, can you?

Thomas’s eyes widen when yet another bruise turns the fingers on Roman’s right hand purple. “Oh no, is it not working? I’m trying, I—“

“No, no.” Roman waves his hand—his non-injured hand. “That one was me.”

A pained noise escapes Thomas. “You can do it to yourself?”

“That’s also not intentional if you’re worried.”

“If I’m—of course I’m worried, Roman!”

Ah. Stupid, stupid Roman. Thomas still thinks he needs Roman—well, in the sense that he needs Roman as he currently is—so of course he’s going to try and fix things.

“You don’t have to be,” Roman says gently, “it’s not like you can stop any and all criticism from hurting you, or even stop it at all. Just…” He motions to Thomas. “Keep going? You’re doing great.”

“…how…how are you the one comforting me?”

“You’re learning about this for the first time. I’ve got the benefit of years of—“

“It’s been happening for years?”

The twinge in his ribs is really not appreciating the constant sighing. Roman leans against the wall, trying to find the least painful spot. “Thomas, I’m your ego. It’s been happening since you had an ego.”

Roman realizes his mistake again and shuts his eyes before gritting his teeth.

“You were worried I’d ducked out and that the others couldn’t get into my room,” he says before Thomas can say anything, “so you summoned me to make sure I was still…around, yes?”

Thomas nods dumbly. Roman smiles.

“Well, here I am,” he mumbles, doing a pathetic version of his normal pose, “all in one piece. I have no intentions of going anywhere, I’m not going to duck out. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“I’m…I’m glad.”

Roman nods, his eyelids starting to droop. At this rate, he’s not going to have enough energy to bandage himself up properly before tomorrow. He’s going to have to wear two undershirts, then.

“Did you need anything else?”

“Yeah, actually.”

Clenching his jaw, Roman forces himself upright. “What is it?”

“Can you let me…patch you up?”

Roman blinks. “What?”

Thomas gestures meekly at the couch and Roman follows, easing himself down. Thomas stands by his side, fingers twitching.

“I, uh, I don’t know as much about first-aid as Logan does—well, not…not in the sense that I’ll be able to access it the same way—but…”

Roman watches as Thomas grabs a first aid kit and sits on the coffee table.

“…can I help?”

“You don’t have to—“

“I want to,” Thomas insists, “and it’ll—it’ll help me not make it worse for you.”

Thomas wants.

“Okay.”

Thomas smiles shakily. “Thank you, Roman. Do, uh, do painkillers work for you guys?”

Roman nods. Thomas passes him two pills. He dry swallows them as Thomas gets out a thing of antiseptic. Bottle. Bottle, that’s what it’s called.

“I, uh, I’m gonna clean the ones on your face, do you…what…” Thomas waves to the rest of him. “What else is there?”

“Mostly bruises,” Roman says, his eyelids beginning to droop again, “they’ll fade.”

“I don’t have bruise cream…”

“Don’t worry about it.” Roman lets himself sink into the couch cushions, ignoring the way the fabric rubs against the abrasions on his back in favor of soft. “This is…more than enough.”

He hisses slightly when the antiseptic comes into contact with his cheek. Thomas’s movements are steady, if a little hesitant, as they clean him up and push his hair out of the way, and it feels…nice?

“Crap, am I making it worse?” Roman blinks his eyes open at the note of fear in Thomas’s voice to see him pulling away. “You’re—you’re crying, Roman, does it hurt?”

“N-no,” Roman mumbles, “I just…wasn’t expecting it.”

“Okay.” Thomas holds the gauze out. “Can I…keep going?”

“…please.”

The gentle motion and just having Thomas here makes it so much harder to keep his eyes open. Roman…Roman doesn’t have to do it this time.

“Roman?”

He shakes himself awake a little more. “Yeah?”

“Who…who normally does this?”

Roman huffs a laugh, gesturing to himself. “Yours truly.”

“…no one helps you with this?”

“Well, I tend to return from the Imagination at…interesting times,” Roman says as Thomas covers the scratch on his cheek with a Band-Aid, “so I’m typically the only one awake.”

“And what about for…this?”

“…still me.”

“Don’t—don’t the others help you?”

Roman huffs, letting Thomas wrap a bandage around his hand. “Why would they?”

Thomas gapes at him. “…do they not know?”

Roman shrugs.

“Not even Patton?”

Patton. Roman grits his teeth. “Why Patton?”

“P-Patton’s the heart,” Thomas says nervously, obviously picking up on the little bit of resentment that slipped unbidden into Roman’s tone, “isn’t it his job to help?”

“Patton’s job is Morality,” Roman corrects, “and feelings. Your feelings. Not mine.”

“Logan then? He knows the most about first-aid.”

“Logan cares about solving problems, Thomas.” He raises his now bandaged hand. “This isn’t a solvable problem.”

“…Virgil?”

Roman just gives him a look.

“…whose job is it to help you, then?”

“That would be me.” Thomas still looks unsure. “It’s fine, Thomas, really. It…it looks worse than it is.”

Thomas’s eyebrows raise.

“Really, it is.”

“It’s someone’s job to look after you, Roman,” Thomas says firmly, packing away the first aid kit, “whether you believe it or not.”

Roman doesn’t believe him, not until later.

It had been going well. He managed to heal most of the visible injuries the rest of that night, walking out the next morning to face the others. They…they accepted his apologies. They accepted him back. And they’d been telling him what they wanted and he listened. He’d been doing so good, the others were so happy.

He was still working on the rest of the redemption plan, resolutely striving towards being better. The blows still landed, but thankfully they landed out of sight. He was doing so much better at hiding things now, hiding the fact that he was still hurt.

A small part of him wanted an apology too.

But he pushed it aside, knowing he wasn’t going to get the one he wanted.

Then…then Janus had found him that day and—and for the first time in a long time, Roman let himself want. He bathed in Janus’s words, the assurances that the others wanted him, the assertion that someone cared about him.

It felt…good.

But it didn’t come free.

Roman’s in his room, sitting on the edge of his bed, thinking. Then a soft pop and he’s abruptly squished by the sudden appearance of another body.

“Remus!”

“Ro-Bro!” Remus drapes himself over Roman like a feral cat, going limp so Roman has to try and pry his dead weight off of him.

“Get off me!”

“Nope,” Remus says, popping the ‘p’ and snuggling delightedly into Roman’s shoulder, “it’s cat pile time.”

“The phrase is ‘dog pile.’”

“Pshh. Dogs don’t lie around on top of each other like this. Cat pile.”

Roman sighs, only to immediately regret it when it just lets Remus wrap his arms tightly around Roman’s waist and squeeze. “Re—mus!”

Remus lets up and Roman gasps, panting as Remus pulls back to look down at him, more serious than Roman’s seen him in a long time.

“Am I hurting you?”

Roman blinks. “What?”

Remus indicates his weight. “Am I hurting you?”

Remus is warm, solid, firm on top of him. And Roman is struck by the feeling that if Remus moves, even for an instant, Roman will fly apart.

“…no.”

“Good.” Remus lies back down, more gently this time, and Roman sighs again at the solidwarmsafereal pressure. Remus turns his head and nuzzles his shoulder. “Felt you were upset. So…cat pile.”

“…cat pile,” Roman agrees, reaching up to hug Remus back.

His brother is right. They used to do this before; lie around on top of each other, brainstorming or arguing or just…existing. The longer Roman holds Remus the more he realizes how much his brother planned this.

Remus isn’t wearing his normal costume, he’s wearing soft things. He smells like he showered. He’s…he’s quiet.

Remus cares.

“R-Remus?”

Remus shifts a little. “Yeah?”

“I…I’m sorry.”

Roman flinches when Remus pulls back, looking down at him. “For what, Ro?”

“Saying you were the evil twin.”

Remus cocks his head. “When’d you say that?”

“…the wedding, I—“

“I thought Janny was the one that said that.”

Roman falters. “…he was, but I…I shouldn’t’ve gotten so insulted by it.”

“Ro, you already apologized for that,” Remus says, leaning down and bonking their foreheads together, blowing Roman’s hair out of his face, “and I wasn’t hurt by it.”

“You weren’t?”

“Heck no, Janny’s always so resolute about his whole ‘everyone is in shades of gray’ act,” Remus huffs, “you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting for him to stop that shit?”

“So…”

“That,” Remus announces delightedly, “was the best moment of my existence. Plus, with the amount of nuisance that I am, it was offensive that he wasn’t calling me evil.”

Roman can’t help laughing at the maniac glee on Remus’s face. When Remus sees it, his smile softens, leaning back down to cuddle Roman.

“You don’t gotta worry about it, Ro,” he murmurs, “and you don’t have to apologize. Especially not to me.”

“…you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“I just…” Roman swallows. “I feel bad.”

“Gathered,” Remus says, giving him a squeeze ‘round the middle. “Tell me more.”

“I feel bad about it,” Roman mutters, “like…like I’m doing something wrong by not feeling fine. L-like the others have done something wrong and I…I want them to say that they did but they haven’t…not really. And I apologized, didn’t I? I…I shouldn’t be hurt by it anymore, but I…I am.”

Something about Roman’s following silence must make Remus realize what’s running through his head because he sits up again.

“Do you need an apology from me?”

Remus is, in fact, the only person Roman doesn’t want an apology from. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Damn right I didn’t.” Remus stares at him, brow creasing. “What’s up, Ro? Why’re you apologizing again? Why’re you feeling so bad?”

Roman fidgets under the gaze. “…Janus said something.”

“I’ll kick his ass.”

“No—“ Roman quickly wraps his arms around Remus and tugs him back down— “no, not like that.”

“No one fucks with my bro except me,” Remus grumbles into his neck, cuddling into him protectively, “so what’d he say?”

Roman swallows. “…Remus?”

“…yeah?”

“Am I…” He swallows again. Why is his throat so dry all of a sudden? “…have I been emotionally abused?”

Remus stills. “Janny say you have?” Roman nods. “…shit, Roman.”

Roman’s chest clenches. “So it’s not true?”

“I didn’t say that.” Remus sits up, pulling Roman with him. “What do you think?”

“I, um…” Roman twists his hands in Remus’s shirt. “It…the things he said…made a lot of sense. But he’s made sense before and he…”

“He’s been lying.” Roman nods miserably. “What did he say specifically?”

“That, um…that they’ve manipulated me into doing what they want. That they’ve shamed me into feeling bad and changing. That they’ve made me f-feel like I can’t feel how I’m feeling and it’s m-my fault when it isn’t.” Why can’t I speak properly? “That they’ve made me question m-my sanity.”

Roman’s eyes widen.

“O-oh,” he manages, “oh my god.”

Remus catches him, holds his face tight despite the tears—when did he start crying?—and gives him a little shake. “Roman. Roman, look at me.”

“Oh my god.”

“You listen to me, Roman, you hear?” Remus looks at him with such an intense expression Roman’s eyes water all over again. “You absolutely are allowed to feel bad. You understand?”

“R-Remus—“

“Come here, bro.” Remus catches him in a tight hug, tight enough that it hurts, fisting the fabric of their clothes, heads buried in each other’s necks, as close as they can get. And it’s so much easier than trying to patiently navigate how to say this out loud without saying the wrong thing. This. This they both understand.

“…have any of them apologized to you,” Remus asks after a while, when their arms ache, “at all?”

Roman nods.

“Properly?”

The pause tells Remus all he needs to know. He curses and takes Roman’s face in his hands again.

“Right. Here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re feeling guilty about the fact that you want those apologies, right?” Roman nods. “You’re trying to forgive them and to some extent you have, but you still want those apologies, right?” Another nod.

Remus leans closer. “Good.”

“G-good?”

“Good. They don’t get to turn around and decide they didn’t hurt you. You don’t get to turn around and tell yourself that you’re not hurt,” Remus says firmly, “you want an apology from them? You damn well don’t have to forgive them until they give you one.”

“I—I don’t?”

“Forgiveness is earned, Roman,” Remus says softly, wiping away Roman’s tears, “not bestowed.”

“But I…I hurt them.”

“So? You fucked them up, they fucked you up. Everyone fucked up everyone else, everyone is fucked up. Doesn’t make further fucking up okay.” Remus gives him a look. “And you got fucked up and you still apologized. You hurt people, be it intentionally or unintentionally, and you realized it and apologized.”

“So I don’t have to forgive them?”

Remus shifts, making them a little more comfortable. “You get to make that choice, Roman. But you don’t have to give them anything until they apologize properly.”

Remus frowns when Roman ducks away, worrying his lip guiltily.

“…I told him I loved him.”

Remus’s shoulders slump. “…oh, Ro…”

“I shouldn’t have,” Roman sobs, scrubbing his face with his hands, “I know I shouldn’t have but I was so tired and he was being so nice and it just—it slipped out.”

“Is it true?”

“Y-yes. I know I shouldn’t but—“

“Why shouldn’t you?” Remus carefully lifts Roman’s chin, pushing his hair back. “Why shouldn’t you love him?”

“Because—“

Roman swallows.

“Because he hurt me. He used me, he manipulated me, he didn’t care how much he was hurting me,” Roman spits, a wave of anger pushing the words into his mouth, “he—he lied to me, he set me up to fail and he made me think I was broken.”

His breathing is heavy. His chest aches. His heart races. Remus holds him steady.

“And do you still love him?”

“…yes.”

“And is that enough?”

Roman blinks up at Remus in confusion. “What?”

“Is that enough?” Remus repeats. “Is the fact that you love him enough to make up for all of that? To make up for the fact that he hurt you, so badly, and he hasn’t apologized for it? Is love enough?”

Oh.

“…no,” Roman mumbles, then raises his chin. “No. No, it isn’t.”

“Good,” Remus says, “then don’t let it be. You love him. You love them. But that’s not enough. Don’t let them try and use it against you.”

“Why,” Roman says weakly, “have I never listened to you before?”

“Because you didn’t want to.” At Roman’s blanching expression, Remus softens, stroking Roman’s cheek. “Because you didn’t think you could.”

“I missed you,” Roman whispers, “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too,” Remus whispers back, “and we’re not gonna go anywhere, yeah?”

“Yeah.” Roman sniffles and wipes his face. “Yeah.”

“Disney marathon?”

“…cat pile?”

Remus grins, flopping down excitedly as Roman squeaks in surprise. “Cat pile!”

“Move your elbow, it’s digging into my ribs.”

“Move your knee, it’s digging into my bladder.”

“That’s my crotch!”

“Hey! Put that hand somewhere else!”

“…thank you, Re.”

“Of course, Ro. You know I’m always here for you.”

“I know…I love you, Remus.”

“Love you too, bro.”

“…it’s enough.”

“Hmm?”

“With you, it’s…it’s enough.”

Remus stills, then he hugs Roman with a ferocity that takes his breath away. Roman hugs back. He may not have much, but he has his brother.

Remus, meanwhile, is fucking furious.

Not at Roman, no, never at Roman, but at the others. For doing this to his brother. And not apologizing for it.

He tightens his grip on Roman and makes a silent promise.

When Roman can’t say it himself, Remus will say it for him.

He gets his chance a few days later.

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#sanders sides #fic #dragonbabbles #rociet #creativitwins #roman sanders #roman angst #roman sanders angst #deceit sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #sympathetic deceit #sympathetic roman #sympathetic remus #sympathetic light sides #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #character!thomas

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