#even if it only was the world of one soul

[ja3yun]

The Doll House | Alt. Ending

warnings: smut (mdni), unprotected sex, cream pie, oral (f.rec), fingering, pussy slapping, overstimulation, !dark content! murder, possession, blood, manipulation, lots of mentions to hell, soul selling, please read the a/n wc: 14.3k heeseung (true ending) | masterlist synopsis: once heeseung sells you an offer you can't refuse, it's up to you to reap what you sow. sooyeol's return and revelations put your world in wonder as you contemplate the implications of your greed and who you truly are a/n: hi! this is a highly requested alternate ending to tdh! this takes place just after heeseung offers y/n to sell her soul in his chapter (pls read that first before this!), i hope this is what you guys wanted! i had so much fun writing it so i hope you enjoy reading it <3 there's a twist in this one that might be confusing but i think i have explained it thoroughly enough but as always, feel free to ask for clarification. likes, reblogs, comments, and feedback are all welcome <3

"If you want this life," he starts, his stare fixed on you, "Let me give it to you." He promises you the future your spirit so desperately desires with a voice that is both powerful and supple, promising support and unfaltering devotion.

A part of you yearns to leap up and accept, drawn to the allure of the life he promises. Yet, you can hear a distant warning of whispers in the recesses of your mind, reminding you of the consequences of such a choice. You can't ignore the lessons learned from Soonyeol's fate, knowing that trading one form of captivity for another may not be the answer. She is happy right now but for how long could she possibly stay that way?

"Y/N?" Jaeyun's voice breaks through the haze, its urgency slicing through the intimate moment with Heeseung. It reverberates down the halls, each bounce signalling his approach, yet the vastness of the mansion keeps him at a distance, prolonging the inevitable interruption.

You tear yourself away from Heeseung’s grip, sitting up as you dare not to look at him, “I can’t have this life, Heeseung. This belongs to Soonyeol.”

As you move to get up and dress, Heeseung grips your face, forcing you to meet his gaze. His eyes bore into yours, studying you with an intensity that leaves your soul feeling exposed, laid bare before him.

"Say the word and she's gone, Baby," he murmurs, his voice low and determined. The fondness and devotion he once held for his minder seem to fade into the background as he tries to persuade you to stay.

Your eyes widen in disbelief at his implication; how could he suggest getting rid of Soonyeol so easily, especially someone who gave their soul to him? While he may believe it's what you want to hear, his words only serve to deepen your doubts about his loyalty and commitment. If he can toss her aside, how quickly will it take him to move on from you?

Pulling his hand from your face, you hold it against your chest, “You told me you don’t break your promises, Heeseung,” you gently confront him. Yet, as you look into his eyes, you see sincerity within them, making you question whether he means his words to you.

“Y/N? Where are you?” Jaeyun shouts once again, panic in his vocals.

“Let me give you your desires,” Heeseung’s lips upturn as he watches your brain fight itself between yielding and defying your urges.

“Y/N? Can you answer me?”

“Come on, Y/N, say it. Tell me you want this.”

“Please answer me!”

Your body instinctively leans into Heeseung's touch, drawn in by the intensity of his gaze as he strokes your cheek with a gentle caress. It's as if you're caught in a trance, captivated by the magnetic pull of his presence. 

Heeseung has this way of making you surrender, like without even owning your soul, he still has it in his possession. You’re tied to him in a way that no one can grasp. You should flee, run to the sound of Jaeyun’s voice and yet, you stay put, leaning closer to Heeseung with a heavy need for the life he is offering.

There’s no way you can say no. So you don’t.

“I want this, Heeseung.”

A sinister smirk etches on his face and a dark chuckle heaves from his chest as he witnesses your resolve crumble away and the girl he needs you to be, start to appear. He has you hook, line, and sinker, and he could not be fucking happier.

His eyes begin to cloud with that crimson hue that used to scare you but now you look at them with a sense of satisfaction; they help you look at yourself in the reflection and see a girl ready to take what is hers, to be selfish for once. After living a life of chasing fulfilment and desires, Heeseung is helping you finally achieve it.

There is still guilt in the pit of your stomach for Soonyeol because once she comes back from her trip, you don’t know what Heeseung will do to her. That is a thought you can’t bear to wonder about too extensively but you need to make sure that she lives and finds a peaceful life elsewhere; only then can your guilty conscience be eased and you can forever embrace this life.

“I’ll make you so fucking happy, baby. I will give you everything you could want and more,” Heeseung mumbles into your bare shoulder, still sticky from the passionate exchange you’ve just had. His lips are so gentle, a juxtaposition from the raw fucking he just blessed you with moments ago. 

Leaning back, you gaze into his eyes once more, they tell a tale of lust and admiration even within the red clouds. But yours are focused on the safety of Soonyeol. “What will you do to Soonyeol? Please don’t kill her…”

Smiling, he strokes your cheek fondly, “You’re still a good girl after all, huh? Don’t worry, I’ll fuck that out of you soon enough.” Heeseung’s manner is playful yet this is serious for you, you need his word that Soonyeol will not succumb to a deadly fate.

“Please, Heeseung. There is no deal if you kill her,” you reiterate, voice holding a stern undertone while it wavers slightly. “I won’t be yours.”

Heeseung does not like that, his eyes narrow dangerously and his fingers, which were once delicately ghosting your cheek, now grip your jaw harshly, bruising the delicate skin. “You don’t get to make demands around here, baby.”

Fear surges through you, but you summon your courage, meeting his fierce gaze with as much defiance as you can muster. “If you want me to stay, then you’ll promise me she’s safe,” you insist, your voice steadier than you feel.

You and Heeseung are locked in a stare-off, both of you unyielding in your demands. He knows despite feeding into your desires, you still have that damn moral compass, and if he wants you to fully be his -  mind, body, and soul - he needs to work with you, at least for now. 

Knowingly, Heeseung relents, his grip loosening on your jaw as he nods. “I won’t kill her, I’ll make sure her soul is alive and well. Trust me, baby.”

And in some strange turn of events, you do trust him. You don’t know if it’s the proximity of his body to yours or the intimate aftermath of your recent encounter, but you find yourself believing in his promise despite the darkness that surrounds him.

“We need to seal the deal, so to speak,” he grins, his thumb wiping roughly over your bottom lip, pushing it down seductively as he inches closer. This is it, you think to yourself, once you kiss him, you’ve given yourself over to him.

Being owned by a Prince of Hell should terrify you, like most of the happenings in this house should have, yet just like every time, it feels right. You do belong to him in some twisted fate, and you feel it more in this moment than ever. Perhaps he is coaxing your mind to surrender to him, or maybe it’s just pure want, for both Soonyeol’s life and the Prince she once called hers.

Swallowing any apprehension you have, you whisper a silent ‘okay’, giving yourself over with consent, much to Heeseung’s delight. And without a second thought, his lips collide with yours once again, his hand cradling the back of your head as he lays you back down on the bed, kissing you with as much fervour as he can manage.

In that heated moment, as your lips meld with his, you feel a surge of conflicting emotions. There's desire, undeniable and fierce, coursing through your veins, mingling with a sense of trepidation at the path you're willingly treading.

Heeseung's kiss is both intoxicating and consuming, his passion igniting a fire within you that threatens to engulf your senses. His hands roam your body with possessive urgency, as if claiming you as his own in every possible way.

As the kiss intensifies, the world around you melts away, leaving only you and Heeseung locked in an eternal embrace. It's as if nothing else matters in this moment but the raw, unholy connection that you share with him. You feel your veins pulsing and your heart racing, like you’re shedding your old self to make way for someone new.

In this moment, you choose to embrace the darkness and submit to the irresistible pull of hunger and temptation. For better or worse, you've made your decision, and there is no turning back now.

“Heeseung, have you seen Y/N?” Jaeyun’s voice rings through the door as he chaps it softly. His voice is laced with concern, the tremble of his chin evident in how his words shake. “I can’t find her, she was with me a minute ago?”

Heeseung’s mouth turns into an evil grin as he continues to ravish you, knowing that you’re officially his now. Snaking his hand up your legs, he dips his hand between your thighs and caresses your swollen clit softly, using his touch to cloud your mind of thoughts with nothing but him and your desire to be his everything.

You gasp at the intrusion, your nub still sensitive from the beating it took not even 30 minutes ago. He has this way of teasing you, yet giving you exactly what you want that makes your heart beat for him. He might not be a God of holy faith, but he is a God nonetheless, and you are ready to worship the ground he walks on.

“Seriously, Heeseung? Did she come by here?” Jaeyun asks once again.

Grunting, he plunges two fingers into your heat and covers your mouth before you can let out a long drone. “Should we let him see you like this?” Heeseung whispers next to your ear, eliciting a panicked shake of the head from you. You loved Jaeyun, more than the stars shine, so seeing him hurt pains you to think about, and seeing you wrapped around his older brother might just kill him. 

Snorting, Heeseung mocks you, shaking his head along with you, a fake pout on his lips as he curls his fingers inside of you. “No? Are you sure?”

“Please, Heeseung,” you mumble against his hand, pleading with him, and the double entendre is not lost on his ears. You're begging him to keep going while also pleading to keep your relationship with Jaeyun intact.

Jaeyun twists the door handle, but the lock prevents him from entering, much to your relief. Heeseung picks up the pace of his fingers and adds his thumb, circling your clit rapidly. Your body arches as he continues to pleasure you, Jaeyun’s persistent attempts to enter now a distant memory.

Not to Heeseung though, who finds the boy grating on his last nerve.

“She’s not here, so fuck off,” he bellows out, rolling his eyes before adoringly focusing on you again. His harsh words towards Jaeyun hurt your heart, but the clench of your walls around his fingers tells Heeseung a different story. “Oh? You like it when I’m mean?”

Yes, you do. Of course, you do. It's how he got you to worship his cock like it was the offering of the last supper. You don’t really like it when Jaeyun is on the other side of it but the way Heeseung is fucking his fingers into you clouds that soft side.

Your body starts to spasm, telling him everything he needs to know. He thrusts his fingers deep inside of you, your spongy walls trapping them in place as you reach your climax.

Thanking hell below for his palm, you hold it close to your mouth as you cum around his fingers, the guttural groan vibrating through Heeseung's doll shell. As you ride the waves of ecstasy, your senses overwhelmed by the intensity of your release, Heeseung watches you with smug satisfaction. He revels in the power he holds over you, relishing in the way your body responds to his touch, every whimper and moan affirming his control.

Once the tremors of your orgasm subside, Heeseung withdraws his fingers slowly, his gaze never leaving yours. He leans in close, his soft lips against your ear as he murmurs, "You're mine, Y/N. All mine."

_____

Staring at one of the dolls on the hallway shelves, you can't help but feel an instant connection to her. The way her apple cheeks are delicately blushed with a light pink pigment exudes innocence, and her eyes, though glassy and vacant, seem to hold a haunting depth that speaks volumes. It's as if she's a frozen embodiment of lost innocence, a silent witness to the darker forces at play within these walls.

Memories of your own past flood back, a time when you too felt like a mere puppet in the hands of fate, devoid of purpose or direction. You remember the fear and uncertainty that once consumed you, the longing for something more than the emptiness that surrounded you.

But then everything changed when you entered this house, when you met Heeseung and the others. They offered you a glimpse of a world beyond your wildest dreams, a world filled with passion, desire, and danger.

A pair of arms wrap around your waist, pulling you from your reverie, and a chin gently rests on your shoulder. Speak of the devil. Heeseung's presence is both comforting and unsettling, his touch sending a shiver down your spine as his lips press firmly against the base of your neck. It's a possessive gesture, a silent reminder of the hold he has over you, yet there's a tenderness in the way he pulls you close, as if seeking solace in your presence. 

Soonyeol’s arrival is imminent and your two months of work finally coming to an end. The thought of breaking the news to her, of telling her that she's being ousted from her own sanctuary, fills you with a sense of dread. You haven’t even broached the subject with the other dolls, clinging to the hope that you can somehow persuade Soonyeol to go quietly and come up with a feeble excuse about how she craved more than the confinements of this house.

But it’s a pipedream, and deep down, you know it. You're at a loss for what to do, desperately hoping that Heeseung has a better idea, though the thought of the suggestions his mind could conjure fills you with unease.

“Do you like her?” Heeseung's soft voice breaks through your thoughts, his hand rubbing soothing circles on your stomach, easing away the nerves without him even realizing.

One thing about Heeseung these past few weeks; he’s been your saving grace. The pull you felt towards him from the moment you arrived has only grown stronger with each passing day, his presence a source of comfort and stability amid uncertainty. He is rude and harsh with you when you show even a slither of humanity for Soonyeol or the dolls, but he makes up for it by being gentle with you in subtle moments.

He's a study in contradictions - pushing and pulling, hot and cold - and yet, you find yourself drawn to him all the same. It's in those fleeting moments of tenderness, when he brushes a strand of hair from your face or pulls you into a comforting embrace, that you catch glimpses of the man behind the Prince.

Nodding in response to his question, you sink into him, the warmth of his body enveloping you like a protective shield against the uncertainty that lies ahead. “She's pretty,” you admit softly, your gaze drifting towards the doll on the shelf, her delicate features frozen in porcelain perfection.

“Not as pretty as you though,” he smirks, his lips tickling your neck as he leans in closer, brushing against your skin in a teasing caress. “Although, you would look pretty as a doll, too.” His tone is dark but it’s washed away with the wave of banter that flows through it.

Turning your head, you raise a sceptical brow. “Is that the clause in our deal? I get to live here, but you keep me as a Polly Pocket?” you jest, laughter bubbling up to chase away the remaining nerves.

Heeseung laughs heartily, his grip on your hips tightening briefly before he steps back, giving you some space. “You are far too powerful, too perfect, to be trapped in a tattered piece of porcelain.” His words carry a sincerity that melts away any lingering doubts, leaving you feeling cherished and reassured in his presence.

You've tried to keep your guard up around him, knowing all too well that beneath his caring facade lies the darkness of Beelzebub. Yet, in moments like this, it's far too easy to forget the true nature of the man before you. Heeseung's charm and the tenderness he has been showing lately makes it all too easy to overlook the sinister power he wields.

But deep down, you know the truth. With one click of his fingers, he could turn your world upside down, shattering everything you hold dear just as easily as he's granted your heart's desires. It's a precarious balance, walking the tightrope between desire and danger, love and fear.

And yet, despite the looming threat that hangs over your head, you find yourself unable to resist the pull of Heeseung's magnetism, drawn to him like a moth to a flame, unable to escape the allure of his darkness; like there is something deeper.

The sound of a car pulling up over the gravel driveway snaps you back to reality, instantly tensing your muscles as a surge of apprehension washes over you. Heeseung notices your rigid frame and pulls you back, his touch both comforting and unsettling.

“I’m going to ask her for a private conversation so there are…no hard feelings,” he begins, his tone cryptic and difficult to decipher. “Bring her and wait in the drawing room,” he adds, pointing to the doll behind you with his chin.

You watch him with a mixture of confusion and apprehension as he walks away, his actions leaving you with more questions than answers. His demeanour is inscrutable, giving nothing away as he disappears from view, leaving you to ponder the plan he's clearly concocted in his head.

With a furrowed brow, you turn your attention to the doll he indicated, a sense of unease settling in the pit of your stomach. There's a foreboding weight to the situation, a feeling that something ominous is about to unfold.

But for now, all you can do is follow Heeseung's instructions and prepare yourself for the private conversation that awaits. With a deep breath, you grab the pretty doll and head to the drawing room with the hope that this will go smoothly.

_____

As you wait for Soonyeol and Heeseung's arrival, you take a moment to marvel at the grandeur of the drawing room. The fancy furnishings and decor speak of a bygone era, a time when elegance and extravagance reigned supreme.

Sunlight filters through the tall windows, casting a warm glow over the room and illuminating the intricate patterns of the Persian rugs that adorn the wooden floors. The walls are covered with priceless works of art, each painting telling a story of its own.

Over the two months you've been working here, you've noticed Soonyeol's love for the 16th-century Renaissance period. Her love for the art and culture of that time is evident in the decor of the entire house. It's as if she's created her own little slice of Renaissance paradise within these walls, a sanctuary where she can escape the troubles of the modern world.

You’re beginning to feel guilty once again, kicking her out of this home just for your own selfish pleasures. Heeseung has convinced you time and time again that this is what you deserve, that he wouldn’t offer this opportunity to someone who wasn’t in dire need of it. 

And you need it. You can’t go back. Not now.

The door creaks open slowly, and Heeseung gestures for Soonyeol to enter before him, a fond eye smile gracing his features as he watches her timid walk. She looks visibly shocked to see you standing there, her expression betraying her surprise as she takes in your presence. It's as if Heeseung hadn't prepared her for your involvement in this delicate conversation. You can see the confusion and uncertainty flicker in her eyes, a reflection of the turmoil brewing within her as she tries to make sense of the situation.

“Hee? Darling, why are we here? Why is Y/N here?” Soonyeol's voice carries a note of confusion as she looks between Heeseung and you, her gaze lingering on you with a hint of curiosity.

The way she calls him "darling" strikes a chord with you, a guard instantly going up until you realise that, at this moment, she still thinks he is hers when in reality, you're the one he's been wrapped around for the past two weeks.

In fact, you've been wrapped around all of her dolls for the past two months.

You offer a gentle wave, an attempt to break the awkward silence that hangs heavy in the air. It's clear that Soonyeol is struggling to make sense of the situation, and you can't blame her. For all she knows the dolls should have stayed exactly that -  dolls. They should never have moved or let you in on the secret about their beings. But you know them all, each depth of their entity and soul, you understand them, more than her it seems if the conversations you’ve had with Jaeyun and Sunghoon are anything to go by.

“This is just somewhere quiet we can talk, this is a sensitive discussion,” he rubs her arms affectionately, reassuring her just as he has done you over the weeks. Yet, his face graces itself with an ill-omened smirk, looking at you with joy in his eyes.

Soonyeol tilts her head and pouts slightly. “So you know about the boys?” she asks softly, her tone laced with caution as she tries to gauge your reaction. Her love and devotion to the dolls means that she is careful about who can know about them and who doesn’t, and she has yet to find someone she trusts with her secret.

You quickly swallow the saliva in your mouth and nod in agreement, “Yeah, they weren’t very discreet, but they have all been so kind to me. I cherish them so much,” you say earnestly. You mean every word of it, maybe more so the fact you cherish them than all of them being kind, but you need to butter this woman up so you can get her to leave as soon as possible.

Soonyeol's expression softens at your response, a flicker of relief crossing her features as she exhales slowly. It's clear that she's been holding her breath, unsure of how you would react to the revelation. “Was it Jaeyun? It was Jaeyun wasn’t it?” 

She begins to laugh, a soft and melodic sound that fills the room, as she shakes her head gently. You can see the wheels turning in her mind as she comes to her own conclusions. Jaeyun's reputation as a chatterbox is well-known throughout the house, so it's no surprise that she would automatically suspect him first. “You know, he’s usually good at keeping promises.”

Heeseung's grip on her shoulders is gentle yet firm, a silent reassurance that he's there for her. He leans in, his voice a low murmur as he interjects. “Speaking of promises,” he whispers to himself, his tone cold yet his touch offering her affection. “Hey, Soon?”

Soonyeol's attention shifts to him, her eyes wide with curiosity as she looks up at him expectantly. “Yeah?” she prompts, her voice tinged with wonder and a hint of apprehension.

“There’s been a change of plans to our deal,” he says, his words cutting through the air with icy precision, even as his hands continue to offer her comfort.

Soonyeol's gaze flickers to you, as if seeking confirmation or understanding from you. You meet her eyes with a blank stare, unsure of what to say or how to react to this unexpected turn of events. “What do you-”

It all happens so quickly.

Heeseung's hands, usually a source of comfort and reassurance to Soonyeol, suddenly transform into instruments of terror as they wrap around her head. One hand clamps down firmly on top, while the other grips her chin from underneath, his fingers digging into her flesh with a chilling intensity.

In one swift, violent motion, he twists her head with a forceful jerk, Soonyeol's neck snaps at a sharp 90-degree angle, the movement so abrupt and forceful that it sends shockwaves rippling through the room. The sound that follows is bone-chilling, a sickening crack that reverberates with such intensity that it feels as though it could be heard from heaven itself. The sound echoes off the walls with a sinister resonance that seems to linger in the air long after the deed is done. 

As you watch in horror, a wave of nausea washes over you, threatening to overwhelm your senses. It's a sight that sears itself into your memory, haunting you long after the moment has passed. In that brief, fleeting instant, you catch a glimpse of the true extent of Heeseung's power, a power that is as terrifying as it is awe-inspiring.

Releasing his grip on Soonyeol's lifeless form, Heeseung steps back with a cold detachment that sends a shiver down your spine. The once warm air now feels cold and thick with tension, the weight of what has just transpired hanging heavily in the room like a suffocating blanket.

He looks down at his past lover's body and squats down beside her, stroking her face. Heeseung's touch on Soonyeol's lifeless form is strangely tender considering the brutality of his actions just moments ago. His expression is unreadable, a mask of indifference masking any trace of emotion. "No hard feelings, baby," he murmurs, his voice barely above a whisper. "You just aren't her."

You don’t have the time nor the brain capacity to register his remark when he stands up, his movements purposeful as he grasps Soonyeol’s wrist firmly, before dragging her to the table on the left side of the room, heaving her up onto it with no struggle at all, as though he is lifting a butterfly who had injured it’s wing. 

Transfixed on the spot, your eyes follow Heeseung's movements as he meticulously arranges Soonyeol's body on the table. He places her hands gently on her stomach and closes her eyes, as if giving her a semblance of peace in death. The room is eerily silent, the only sound being the faint rustle of his movements.

Heeseung then walks around the table with an unsettling calm, his presence both comforting and terrifying. He plants a chaste kiss on your lips, a contrast to the violent act he just committed. "I'll be right back, baby," he murmurs softly, his voice almost soothing.

As he heads towards the door, leaving you alone with Soonyeol's lifeless body, panic and guilt surge through you. You're left with the grim reality of the situation - a situation you played a part in creating. The weight of your actions presses heavily on your conscience, threatening to crush you under its burden.

You can't bear to look at her. The sight of Soonyeol, so still and silent, is too much to handle. Turning away, you feel a deep sense of shame and regret wash over you, mingling with the fear that now grips your heart. The room feels colder, the air you breathe thicker with the weight of your guilt.

In the oppressive silence, you struggle with the knowledge of what you've done, unable to escape the haunting reality of your involvement in this tragedy. You wanted this life, but not like this, not with blood on your hands; Heeseung had promised you that much.

Heeseung returns with the ornate bowl from the altar, slamming the door shut behind him with a resounding thud that makes you jump. He locks it with a deliberate twist of the mechanic, sealing the room and adding to the claustrophobic tension. With a casual grace, he spins the priceless bowl in his hands as though it were a mere football, his nonchalance juxtaposing sharply with the gravity of the situation.

Making his way to the table, he places the bowl just above Soonyeol's head. His movements are quick and precise, a sense of urgency evident in his actions. "Come on, baby, it’s your time to shine," he urges, his voice carrying an impatient edge.

"W-what?" you stammer, barely able to form the words as the reality of what’s happening starts to sink in.

Heeseung doesn’t look at you, instead snapping his fingers and pointing towards you, "Did you bring that pretty doll I asked you to?"

The doll. The beautiful doll that you picked up earlier now takes on a sinister significance. Your mind races, slowly piecing together the grim puzzle. But as you stand frozen, struggling to process, Heeseung elaborates, confirming your worst suspicions. "We’re going to take Soonyeol’s soul from in here," he slaps her still, dead stomach with a forceful smack that makes you flinch, "and we are going to put it in there."

The innocent doll sits idly by, its painted eyes staring blankly ahead, unaware of the dark fate it has been chosen to bear. You feel sick as you realise the full extent of what Heeseung plans to do; you can’t believe this is what you caused.

Your eyes, which once couldn't look at Soonyeol, are now transfixed on her, unable to focus on anything else. You struggle to breathe, each inhale feeling like a weight pressing down on your chest.

Heeseung, growing increasingly irritated by your lack of response, strides over to you. “Fucking hell, Y/N,” he huffs, exasperation evident in his voice. As he gets close, he grabs a chunk of your hair, dragging you over to the lifeless girl and forcing you to lean over the table, your face just inches from Soonyeol’s paling features. “You asked for this,” he snarls, his voice dripping with anger and frustration.

But this isn’t what you wanted. Not at all, and he knows that. “No… this is… you said you wouldn’t kill her,” you whisper, your voice barely audible through the hushed sobs that threaten to break free. You aren’t exactly crying, unable to even process the whirlwind of emotions swirling in your head: fear, anguish, dread, curiosity, admiration.

“If you do your fucking job, then she won’t be dead, will she?” Heeseung releases his grip on your hair, smoothing it out with an almost tender touch before scanning the room for the doll. Once he spots it, he swiftly retrieves the porcelain and places it next to the bowl.

Heeseung's eyes flicker with a cold intensity as he sets everything in place, his movements precise as you watch him in awe. “Here’s what you’re going to do,” he instructs, his voice commanding and brooking no argument. “You’re going to transfer her soul into this doll. If you succeed, she’ll live. Fail, and she’s gone forever, she goes down there with all my legions, Got it?”

He sees you considering the consequences, your eyes wide with fear and uncertainty. With a sigh, he rubs his face in frustration. Deep down, he knows this is a lot for you to process and he should be somewhat more lenient to your shock, but now is not the time.

“Listen, baby, if I know the girl inside of you, then you can do this easily, okay?” His voice is gentler now, as if he is trying to reach a deeper part of you, seeking someone else within your soul.

His words strike a chord within you, and you take a deep breath, trying to steady your racing heart. You nod, determination slowly replacing the paralyzing fear. “I can do this,” you whisper to yourself, though the words are meant for him as well.

“That’s my girl,” he smiles wickedly, seeing that tint of cloud form around your body, “Now repeat after me:

nrober eb tirips eht tel eerced swodahs yb

nrot eb liev eht tel ecarbme sthgiliwt ni

derrulb elballys yreve stneicna fo eugnot eht ni

draeh ron nekops rehtien sdrow eht rettu

htrae eht ssik smaebnoom erehw

htaerb sthgiliwt eht ni shpylg sti ecart

trap llahs luos eht llehs latrom eht morf rof

traeh nmelos a htiw stcafetra eseht rehtag

niht si liev eht dna ecnad swodahs nehw ruoh eht ni”

He says the lines slowly, ensuring that you copy every syllable for perfect diction. You don’t know what language this is but it is identical to the one Jongseong spoke when he called hell. The words feel heavy on your tongue, ancient and powerful, as if they carry the weight of centuries.

As you repeat the incantation, a strange sensation washes over you like you’re suddenly powerful and the words come so easily to your lips you might as well be fluent. The air in the room grows thicker, charged with an otherworldly energy that sends shivers down your spine. You focus on Heeseung’s voice, steady and commanding, guiding you through the spell until you’re saying it along with him, chanting it like these are your vows, to have and to hold. 

Heeseung takes Soonyeol's hand and cuts into her palm, dripping her blood into the stone bowl carefully while you repeat the ritual over and over again just as instructed. The bowl begins to glow with a pulsating red light, its intensity increasing with each word. He carefully takes his finger and paints an upside-down cross on the doll's forehead, but it looks more like an X with the smudge of her carmine sweetness. 

The shadows in the room seem to come alive, swirling around you in a dance that mirrors the rhythm of the incantation. The temperature drops and your breath comes out in visible puffs of mist. Heeseung’s eyes never leave you, his expression a mix of pride and anticipation. “Fuck, there you are,” he heaves out, his tongue menacingly sticking out of his mouth past his evil smile, as if he’s getting turned on by just seeing you utter the words of his mother tongue.

But so are you, or at least, your body is charged with high energy. It's as if a dormant power within you has been awakened, stirring to life with an insatiable hunger for the raw, untamed energy that tornados around you.

In this moment, you feel more alive than you have ever felt before, every sense heightened to an almost unbearable degree. The air crackles with anticipation, charged with the potent magic that hangs thick in the atmosphere. You can feel the pulse of the earth beneath your feet, the rhythmic beat of its heart synchronising with your own.

As you reach the final verse, the light from the bowl blazes brightly, casting eerie shadows across Soonyeol’s lifeless form. With the last syllable, the energy within the bowl surges outward, a tangible wave of force that knocks the breath out of your lungs. It dances its way into Soonyeol’s being, collecting pieces of her soul that are hidden in the depth of her body before drawing it out, the pure white mist following the red light energy before it guides her to the doll.

You watch in awe and terror as she flows into the doll, its porcelain face glowing with an unearthly light. Soonyeol’s body twitches, a final spasm and gasp of life before it goes completely still. The doll’s eyes now hold a flicker of life within them that was not there before. She is alive.

Once the ritual concludes and Soonyeol's soul is sealed within the doll, the room descends into an eerie darkness, the once vibrant glow of the ritual bowl fading into obscurity. The only illumination comes from the soft hues of the setting sun filtering through the window, casting long shadows that dance across the room.

Heeseung observes you closely, his eyes penetrating the darkness with an intensity that belies the gloom. He senses the subtle shift within you, a transformation he has long anticipated; that greed for your own satisfaction, to take what you want from this world, for you to come home to him. 

In his eyes, you are bathed in a vermillion aura, an ethereal glow that marks you as a being of otherworldly power. It's a sight that would be invisible to the naked human eye, but to Heeseung, it's a sign of your rightful place among the divine. In the underworld, such a sight would be revered and worshipped as a symbol of authority and dominion. And by God does he want to get on his knees to bow before you and pledge his unwavering loyalty.

You might not be able to see the glow around you, but you can feel it. It’s exhilarating, the passion and vitality coursing through your bloodstream, electrifying every nerve ending and racing to your heart and your core. There is no logical explanation for the arousal that pulses through you because what you should be feeling is confusion; why did you enjoy that? And why did you know the ritual as if it were engraved in your very being?

Noticing the subtle movement of your thighs as they press together, Heeseung's signature wicked grin returns to his face. "Oh, baby, did that make you needy?" he taunts, his voice dripping with amusement as he leans on the table, his gaze fixed on your squirming form. “Do you want me to fuck you as a reward?”

You can't deny the rising heat within you, the inexplicable lust that courses through your veins. It feels wrong, given the circumstances, yet, here you are, trapped in a moment of perverse desire, all while grappling with the implications of your actions.

Biting down on your lip, you nod, completely entranced by the sight before you. Heeseung exudes a magnetic allure, his rugged appearance heightened by the faint spatters of blood on his hands, the intensity of his gaze drawing you in like a moth to a flame. Your eyes trace the contours of his form, from the slight tilt of his neck to the tantalising glimpse of his collarbone peeking out from beneath his low-cut black t-shirt.

Interpreting your nod as consent, Heeseung seizes Soonyeol by the neck and flings her to the ground with a forceful thud, sending a shiver down your spine that's equal parts fear and exhilaration as you hear a bone crack. Heeseung doesn’t need to care about a lifeless meat suit, not when the real Soonyeol is safe and sound in the doll you hand-picked for her.

Just as the room falls into a heavy silence, punctuated only by the echo of your racing heartbeat, a frantic knocking at the door shatters the calm. Jongseong's desperate pleas slice through the air, his voice laced with worry and fear. "Soonyeol?! Baby, are you in there? I can’t hear you anymore, angel…"

The sound of his desperate voice sends a pang of guilt coursing through you. Your heart clenches at the thought of Jongseong's anguish, his unwavering love for Soonyeol evident in every word he utters, every fibre of his soul. He must have felt something wrong once Heeseung - no, you - stuffed her into the tiny doll. 

You broke apart soulmates all for your selfish gain, so you could live happily. But what about him? Jongseong risked everything to be with Soonyeol and you took it from him with the snap of a neck. You cannot imagine having a soulmate being ripped from you that suddenly.

“Y/N? Are you in there? Jongseong, is she in there, is she hurt?” Jaeyun’s voice shadows Jongseong’s sobs as he asks questions that his elder doesn’t know the answer to; his focus is not on you but on his lover who he knows has suffered a terrible fate.

Your gaze shifts to Heeseung, searching for answers in the depths of his dark eyes. "Why can’t he feel her? I thought their souls were connected, not their bodies?" you ask, confusion clouding your thoughts.

Heeseung nods, his movements sleek and calculated as he approaches you. "She was his as long as she was alive, but she sold her soul to me, remember? As soon as she flatlines, she’s mine to own, not anyone else," he explains coldly, his tone devoid of remorse or sympathy.

Noticing your lust for the darker side wavering due to guilt, Heeseung tries to pull you back to him, his hands cradling your face as he forces you to look into his deep eyes. “Don’t listen to them, baby. You have spent your whole life searching for this moment. Don’t let them take it away from you.”

“But-”

"Shhh," Heeseung interjects, pressing a gentle, lover-like kiss to your lips. "Your desires are all that matters now. Think about it - if he truly loved her, he wouldn’t have sinned for you, fucked you like that behind her back." His words are calculated, an attempt to envelop you in the darkness, to paint your world in sinister shades of red and black. He watches your dark aura flicker as you take in his words and silently agree, satisfaction gleaming in his eyes.

Jongseong’s desperate cries from outside the door tear at your conscience, his pleas a stark contrast to Heeseung’s poisonous whispers. “Don’t listen to him, Y/N. You’re a good girl, remember?” he begs, his voice filled with sorrow and desperation. You hadn’t known they could hear you from here, then again, the walls are thin, hence why each time Jongseong asked to see you, it would be in a faraway room from Jaeyun or Sunghoon. Heeseung was right about one thing, he sinned with you, for you.

Jongseong’s anguish is palpable, his regret weighing heavily on him. He knows he’s betrayed Soonyeol, seeking forbidden pleasure with you. Yet, something within you drew him to sin, almost compelled him to become the man he swore he would never be.

Heeseung’s mocking grin widens, feeding off his brother’s inner turmoil. "You see, baby, everyone has a dark side. Even angels fall," he murmurs, his voice laced with satisfaction. He steps closer, his presence overwhelming, his eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that makes it hard to breathe. “And why can he have everything he wants but you can’t?”

He makes a valid point, the feeling in your chest wavering as you think about it. Everyone around you has gotten their desires met, whether in relationships, financial stability, or their dream job. Jongseong gave in and got Soonyeol, Jaeyun wanted to be loved and got a family who cherishes him, and Sunghoon wanted to break free from the cell that kept him captive and a master who was out for blood, and he got solace in these walls.

Why can’t you be selfish like them? Why should you feel guilty for accepting an offer that all of them did so easily?

Watching you fight back, Heeseung's eyes pulse with a vivid red, knowing he needs only one final push to bring you back into his embrace, to unveil the true you. “Do you think I would have brought you here if you weren’t special?” he asks, stepping closer with predatory grace.

Confused, you knit your brows together and shake your head, searching his eyes for answers.

“My sweet, baby. I had to get you home,” he starts, softly running his fingers through your hair. “I’ve spent centuries on this earth, bound to one whore after another, searching high and low for my other half. It was so difficult, sweetheart, but I finally found you.”

You lean into his touch as he gently scratches behind your ear, your mind whirling with his words. What does he mean? You hadn’t met him before that day with Mia. When did you ever ask for his help?

Sensing your confusion, he continues. “You were so lonely, moving to the big city all on your own with no one to keep you safe. I heard you call out for guidance, for salvation once life bruised you. I felt compelled to help you, to bring you a lifetime of happiness.”

Breathing heavily, you shake your head. “I never called out to you, not like the others did.”

“Exactly. I could hear you even when God was meant to pick up your silent prayers, yet they filtered to me. Do you know why?” he asks, stroking your cheek softly as you shake your head. “You’re my girl, my beautiful Alaida. I searched heaven and earth for you the day Lucifer took you from me.”

Beelzebub and Alaida, two lovers torn apart due to Lucifer’s wrath. Alaida had made the mistake of asking for a legion of her own, to be respected on par with the others because she possessed powers that surpassed the Princes. She was beautiful, cunning, a Princess in her own right. But Lucifer, fearing she would surpass him, conspired with Mammon and Leviathan to kill her. It took three men to subdue one woman who hadn't even harnessed all her powers. It was a pathetic attempt to keep their dicks swinging low and the power in their hands.

Despite her death, Beelzebub never stopped searching. He knew the fire of her power could never be extinguished by pretenders to godhood, and that somewhere, she must have found a place to hide. She had often spoken of Earth, envying humans' simple existence, so he knew she would have sought refuge in a human vessel.

For years, Beelzebub answered any calls that might be her in disguise, hoping she would find someone worthy to keep her safe. Soonyeol was one such woman he thought might harbour his lover, and so he answered her call with hope.

But then, you cried out to him, turning his suspicions around. It was impossible to summon him in the Earthrealm without chanting his name, yet you did. Your soul, Alaida’s being, reached out to find him.

You breathe heavily, the weight of his words pressing on you. “I’m not Alaida… I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you whisper, though your thoughts scream otherwise. You've always felt a pull to Heeseung, but being his lost lover is something you cannot grasp.

“Oh, but baby, you are,” he says slowly, a slight laughter escaping his lips. “Once I heard you and had my suspicions, I convinced Soonyeol to place the ad for a house sitter and sent her to the other side of the world to collect an owed soul. Your friend Mia was an obstacle, but it didn’t take long to make that spineless bitch cower away.” Heeseung continues, planting soft, affectionate kisses on your face. “You are my love. I just had to tie myself to your soul to see it. Looking at you now, Y/N, with that power sparking from your soul, I know my Alaida is deep inside you. We are connected, you and I.”

“Y/N, don’t listen to him! He’s lying!” Jongseong’s raspy voice cuts through, causing your eyes to flicker to the door.

Heeseung won’t stand for the interruption, drawing your attention back with a gentle slap to your face, his cold rings adding to the shock of his actions. His eyes convey what his mouth does not, and suddenly, you do not wish to be guided by Jongseong; you need to be taken by Heeseung.

There’s a storm raging in your chest, an electrifying tempest that tells you Heeseung is right, that Alaida is indeed inside you. This fierce courage you’ve summoned to confront literal demons and defy the infernal powers - it had to be her. The transformation from the person who once quivered at the thought of answering a phone call from an unknown number to standing resolute before Heeseung speaks volumes. His presence ignites a power within you, a fire that feels both foreign and intimately familiar, like a lover’s caress stirring memories of a past life.

“You feel her, don’t you?” Heeseung’s voice is husky, dripping with dark allure, as if he’s reading your innermost thoughts. “I don’t know why she chose you, but you have to let her shine. She saw something in you that she hasn’t seen in over 600 years. You’re special, Y/N.”

Fear and awe mix in your trembling voice as you ask, “…will I lose myself if I do?”

Heeseung’s gaze softens, his eyes burning with a mix of fervour and tenderness. He moves closer, his presence overwhelming and comforting at the same time.

“Y/N, please, I don’t know what’s going on but I need you to listen to Jongseong, okay?” Jaeyun’s voice penetrates the heavy atmosphere, his confused desperation evident as he shouts through the door, desperately trying to break through the barrier both physical and metaphysical.

The air thickens with tension, every heartbeat echoing like a drum in your ears. Heeseung's grip tightens slightly, grounding you in the present. His touch is both an anchor and a reminder of the raw power that lies within you. The pull towards Heeseung, towards your true self as Alaida, feels like a gravitational force, irresistible and consuming.

Outside, Jongseong’s pleas grow more frantic, each word a dagger aimed at your conscience. “Y/N, don’t give in to him. Remember who you are!” His voice cracks with emotion, a stark contrast to Heeseung’s unwavering composure.

Heeseung’s eyes bore into yours, unyielding and confident. “You won’t lose yourself, my love. You’ll become who you were always meant to be.” 

As Heeseung’s words weave their spell around you, the power within you stirs, a dormant volcano on the brink of eruption. The weight of the decision presses down, yet there’s a clarity amidst the chaos. The pull of Alaida’s power, the connection shared with Heeseung, feels undeniably right. Heeseung watches in awe as the red light around you blossoms like a tulip in spring, unfurling into its true, ethereal form.

You stand on the precipice of your decision and the room around you seems to hold its breath, waiting. The doll with Soonyeol’s soul watches with unblinking eyes, a silent witness to the battle waging within you. The echoes of Jongseong and Jaeyun’s cries linger, a haunting reminder of the consequences of your actions.

Closing your eyes, you listen to your heart, letting its desire guide you.

And your heart wants Heeseung.

Opening your eyes, you gaze into Heeseung’s, your need to be consumed by this ancient love reflected in your expression. With a deep breath, you nod, surrendering to the inevitable. His eyes light up with a mixture of triumph and adoration as he steps closer, his presence overwhelming and comforting.

“My love, I’ve missed you so much,” he breathes out, his voice trembling with emotion.

Before you can respond, he captures your lips in a fervent kiss, enveloping you in his longing. The sensation of Heeseung’s black heart being yours to cherish sparks an overwhelming joy within you. His tongue entwines with yours, his kiss filled with a desperate passion that speaks of centuries of yearning. His hands tangle in your hair, gripping tightly as he pulls you closer, guiding you to the edge of the table where Soonyeol once lay.

The table’s cold surface presses against your back as Heeseung’s body moulds to yours, his touch igniting a fire that burns brighter with each passing second. His lips trail from your mouth to your jawline, then down your neck, leaving a scorching path in their wake. Every kiss, every touch, feels like a reclamation of a love that was cruelly stolen. 

“Y/N, you’re so fucking perfect I just want to rip you apart,” he murmurs into your nape, his hands gripping your waist possessively.

You pull his head back, your eyes locking deeply into his, a storm of emotions swirling within them. “Don’t go easy on me,” you smile, almost innocently but with a daring challenge. He crumbles beneath you, his resolve melting as he hears his lover's whispered words leave your mouth.

“Fuck, I wouldn’t dream of it,” he laughs wickedly before claiming your mouth with his once again. His kiss is fierce and demanding, pulling you to sit at the edge of the table. His hands, strong and unyielding, move with purpose, tearing away your clothes piece by piece. Each shred of fabric falling to the floor is a testament to his strength and desperation to feel your skin against his.

The room fills with the sound of tearing cloth and your heavy breaths, the air charged with anticipation and raw need. Heeseung’s eyes devour you, his gaze dark and intense, as though he’s trying to memorize every inch of your exposed skin. His hands follow his eyes, caressing and gripping, leaving no part of you untouched.

“You’re mine,” he growls, his voice low and possessive, a promise and a declaration all at once. His hands slide up your thighs, spreading them apart as he sinks to his knees before you. “All mine.”

The words send a shiver down your spine, anticipation and desire coursing through you. His hands grip your thighs firmly, his fingers digging into your flesh as he gazes up at you with a hunger that makes your heart race. The sight of him kneeling between your legs, his dark eyes filled with unbridled lust and possessiveness, is enough to make your breath hitch.

Heeseung's mouth hovers just above your skin, his nose ghosting over your most sensitive areas. He takes his time, savouring the moment, his eyes never leaving yours. The tension builds, a delicious agony as you wait for him to touch you.

When his lips finally make contact, it's like an electric jolt, pleasure radiating from the point of contact throughout your entire body. His tongue traces a path along your inner thigh, the sensation both torturous and exhilarating. Heeseung's touch is rough yet tender, a perfect blend of dominance and affection that leaves you breathless.

Biting at your skin, he leaves a trail of teeth marks as a sign of possession. The sensation makes your body squirm, needing him even more than you have over the past two months. With Alaida swirling inside of you, you feel even more desperate for his touch, her soul craving to be claimed by Beelzebub once more.

Finally, his mouth attaches itself where you need it the most, his tongue working on your clit with eagerness. Each flick of his muscle sends waves of pleasure coursing through you, building the heat in your core to a fever pitch. He knows exactly how to drive you wild, his movements deliberate and skilled as he worships you with his mouth.

You arch your back, pressing yourself closer to him, urging him to take you higher. He responds with a growl of approval, his hands gripping your thighs tightly as he delves deeper into your pleasure. The intensity of his touch is overwhelming, pushing you closer and closer to the edge with each passing moment.

His teeth sink down on your clit with force which makes you howl out, mixing with the sobs of the angels who occupy the other side of the door. “Fuck, Heeseung, do it again,” you huff out, grasping at his roots to urge him on.

“You always were a glutton for punishment,” he sneers, biting down on your sensitive flesh. The sting is sharp, sending a jolt through your body that leaves you craving more. It all starts to make sense now, the love you had for the punishment Jongseong gave you on the altar; it wasn’t a newfound kink, it was Alaida - she loves it rough.

And now, so do you.

Heeseung’s mouth is relentless, his tongue and lips working with expert precision as he rises from his knees. He doesn’t break contact for a second, lifting your hips effortlessly to meet his mouth. Your back lies flat on the table, your body arching instinctively towards him, each touch of his tongue sending waves of pleasure through you. His hands grip your thighs firmly, holding you in place, their strength both reassuring and dominant.

The room is filled with the sound of your ragged breaths and his eager, hungry ministrations. Heeseung’s eyes lock onto yours, their dark intensity burning with desire. 

Your hands clutch at the edge of the table, knuckles white from the force of your grip as you lose yourself in the sensation. Every nerve ending is alive with electricity, every inch of your skin hypersensitive to his touch, the warmth of his lips against your most intimate places.

Heeseung’s mouth is everywhere at once, his tongue circling your clit before plunging deep inside you, exploring and tasting with an insatiable hunger. The pressure builds within you, a coil winding tighter and tighter, each flick of his tongue pushing you closer to the edge. His fingers dig into your flesh, marking you as his, a physical reminder of his claim over you.

Moving your hips in a rocking motion, he guides you to ride his face while he works in tandem with his tongue to bring you to the edge. His lips, soft yet demanding, latch onto your swollen clit with a hunger that mirrors your own. He sucks and nibbles with relentless vigour, coaxing waves of pleasure to cascade over you in an unending tide. The combination of his tongue and lips creates a symphony of sensation that brings you to the edge.

“I'm cumming, Heeseung," you gasp, your voice heavy with yearning as your body convulses with the force of your climax. Every fibre of your being ignites with pleasure, sending sparks of ecstasy coursing through your veins.

Heeseung's name tumbles from your lips like a fervent prayer, a plea for release and surrender. With each pulse of pleasure, you feel yourself lost in a whirlwind of sensation.

And then it happens. A bolt of white-hot ecstasy shoots through you, shattering your senses as you spiral into the abyss of euphoria. Your entire body convulses with the force of your release, every muscle tensing and relaxing in perfect harmony with the waves of pleasure crashing over you.

Heeseung doesn't let up, his mouth continuing to work its magic as you ride out the aftershocks of your orgasm. He drinks in every moan and whimper, every twitch and tremble, savouring the taste of your pleasure as if it were the finest delicacy known to man.

Finally, as the last echoes of your cries fade into the ether, you collapse against the table, your body spent and sated. Heeseung's lips linger against your skin, pressing soft kisses against your thighs before letting go of your hips as you bask in the afterglow of your passion.

With a firm hand, he delivers a sharp slap to your clit, the sting sending a jolt of pleasure coursing through your body. Your back arches in response, your breath catching in your throat as the sensation radiates from your core to your shoulders. He revels in the power he holds over you, his smirk widening as he watches your body react to him. 

His touch is both punishment and reward as he continues, “You’re going to cum again,” he growls, not as a prediction but an order; one you are happy to obey. 

As the intensity increases with every slap, you find yourself squirming, aching to get away but longing to stay and take it. Heeseung is skilled at taking you to the edge, and he takes pride in your every sound of agony and gasp.

“T-too much, Heeseung.” Your plea escapes your lips in a desperate whimper, the overwhelming sensation of your overstimulated nub pushing you to the brink of your boundaries. It's a dizzying mix of pleasure and suffering, with each touch sending shockwaves of sensations rushing through your body.

“You can take it,” he says authoritatively, landing another harsh slap to your reddened pussy. “Once you cum, I’ll stop.”

So you relax your body as much as you can given the circumstances, focusing on the rapture of it. Heeseung watches you give in and licks his lips, using the opportunity to unleash his sadistic need to power over you. With rapid hits, he doesn’t give your clit time to breathe as he smacks it over and over again.

Somehow, the faster he’s going, the more enjoyable it is, “Holy shit, Hee!” you scream out. Your hands claw at your thighs as you force them to stay open, enjoying the beating your heat is receiving. Your body bucks against his relentless assault, the sting of each impact resonates deep within you, igniting a primal fire that courses through your veins.

“Such a perfect little princess,” he chides, alternating his hands to quicken the pace. 

As his fingers graze down your pussy with each hit, you can feel yourself teetering on the edge of oblivion. The rhythm of his assault becomes hypnotic, driving you closer and closer to the brink with every stroke. Your skin tingles with anticipation, every nerve ending alive with the electric charge of desire.

And then, just when you think you can't take anymore, it happens. Your body convulses with the force of your release, pleasure exploding through every fibre of your being as you cry out his name. The intensity of it all is overwhelming, a whirlwind of ecstasy that consumes you whole.

Heeseung's movements falter for a moment, his touch gentling as he guides you through the aftershocks of your orgasm. His fingers trace soothing patterns against your skin, each caress a balm to the raw, pulsating heat between your legs. 

Your essence drips down your pussy onto the table, creating a sheen that Heeseung can see his reflection in. His eyes are blown out red, succumbing to the demon within him as he brings you gratification.

As you descend from the soaring heights of bliss, you quiver from exhaustion. Heeseung's lips brush over your flesh, planting sweet kisses on your thighs while murmuring words of appreciation and devotion. 

“You did well, baby. So fucking good for me,” he utters into your skin. Heeseung's lips trail a path of reverence up your body. Each kiss feels like a benediction, a testament to the intensity of your connection. As he reaches your tummy, his tongue darts out to taste the salty-sweet sheen of sweat, his movements slow and deliberate.

The tenderness of his touch contrasts sharply with the raw passion that still lingers in the air “You’re mine, all mine,” he whispers against your skin like a mantra, affirming your worth and igniting a spark of warmth.

With each kiss and lick, he worships your body as though you are a sacred temple, his devotion evident in every caress. And as he finally reaches your breasts, his lips envelop one nipple in a gentle suck, giving it attention as it stands proudly for him.

His fingers glide up the curves of your body, tracing delicate trails that elicit a gasp from your lips. A smirk dances across his face as he captures the sound, his nails leaving faint imprints along the way. With a playful tug, he ensnares your bud between his teeth, pulling at it before releasing with a teasing flourish.

Taking hold of your throat, he draws you closer, his gaze ravenous as he savours every contour of your face. “I’m going to fuck you so good, baby, you’ll be crying out for God to save you.” His words make you mewl out, chasing his lips with yours as you seek his unholy kisses, yet he denies you, shaking his head playfully. “Bad girls get kisses, so show me how bad you can be.”

Without breaking his gaze, you nod and shimmy yourself once again to the edge of the table, spreading your legs as wide as they can go, showing your eagerness to please him. The sight before him makes Heeseung’s eyes pulse and his doll shell shiver. You’re a vision no higher power could ever create.

You’re a gift from hell.

Positioning himself at your entrance, he plunges in with unbridled urgency, sending waves of shock and lust through your body. The suddenness of his movement catches you off guard, but the sensation is electrifying, sparking a starving hunger deep within you. 

He sets a steady rhythm, thrusting into you with determination to ensure that this is the best fuck of your life, to make sure you know that he is the only one that can give you what you need. 

Your walls clench around him in response to his fastening pace, your body instinctively welcoming him as he delves deeper, the tip of his cock hitting your deep spot. Each movement is calculated and deliberate, each thrust a testament to his demonic desire as he sets a punishing flow that leaves you trembling with pleasure.

With a raw intensity, he takes you roughly, his cock sliding effortlessly in and out of your wet heat. A moan escapes your lips as you feel him stuff you to the brink, the sensation overwhelming in its intensity. He's holding nothing back, fucking into you the way he knows you like, the way his Alaida likes it.

“You’re so good at taking my cock,” he grunts out through gritted teeth. “Tell them how good it feels to be fucked like this.” By them you know he means the two weeping angels who are still outside of the door, their pleas for you to stop swallowed by your loud moans.

“I love your cock. You fuck me so good, Heeseung. I want you to fuck me forever,” you exclaim, gripping his neck as stability, staring intensely into his beautiful crimson eyes. You steal a kiss, closing your eyes at his soft lips melting into yours. He doesn’t reprimand you for it, instead, he ravishes you with mirrored passion, his hips never faltering.

"You don't need to sell your soul for me to grant that wish, baby," Heeseung growls between heated kisses, his voice rough with desire.

You respond with a desperate moan, arching your back to meet his every thrust. "Don't stop," you plead, your nails digging into his skin as you cling to him, lost in the overwhelming sensations.

Heeseung's growl reverberates through the room as he bucks his hips with increasing urgency, driving deeper into you with each thrust. His voice, rough with desire, commands your attention. "Tell them you belong to me, and I'll give you whatever you need. I'll go as long as you want."

Without hesitation, you nod fervently, your voice hoarse as you cry out his name along with the words he craves to hear. "I belong to you, Heeseung. Only you," you gasp, the declaration punctuated by a sharp intake of breath as pleasure courses through your veins.

His hand tightens around your throat, a rough but controlled grip that sends shivers down your spine. In one swift motion, he pushes you back onto the table roughly, the sudden crash of your skull on the wooden surface causing your head to crack and spin with dizzying intensity. Yet, far from unsettling you, the sensation only serves to heighten the exhilarating rush of desire pumping in your body.

Pushing your head to the side with a firm grip, Heeseung forces you to face the sight of Soonyeol's lifeless form. The vibrant energy that once animated her is now replaced by a haunting stillness, her body lying pale and broken before you.

"Tell her," Heeseung's voice is low, his tone commanding as he demands your acknowledgement of the grim reality before you. 

You should be repulsed, the sight of Soonyeol's lifeless body enough to shatter the euphoria of the moment. But instead, there's an unsettling allure, a twisted fascination in knowing that what once belonged to her is now yours and she has no way to steal it back from you. Her dolls, her house, Heeseung -  it all belongs to you now, a chilling testament to the power you hold over her legacy.

"I'm Heeseung's, only his," you declare, your voice wavering slightly as conflicting emotions swirl within you. Alaida gleams at the sight, happy that her lover is now only hers, but you still feel sorrow for the girl. 

Conflicting emotions swirl within you like a tumultuous storm, battling for dominance as you and Heeseung's ancient love wrestle for control of your consciousness. But deep down, you understand that you are her now, and she is you - merged together in a dance of shared existence. There is no longer a distinction between you versus her; she chose you to carry her soul, binding you together in a singular entity.

In the wake of Alaida's inhumane recklessness, it falls upon you to navigate the delicate balance between humanity and evil. Despite the darkness that threatens to consume you, you cling to the flicker of compassion that still burns within your heart, a beacon of light amidst the shadows. You had to fight against her demons with your light.

Heeseung's grip tightens on your head as he pounds into you with unrelenting force, his touch igniting a fiery ache that resonates through your exhausted body. With each harsh thrust, he draws you closer to the edge, his touch a symphony of sensation that pushes you towards the brink of ecstasy.

Your walls tighten around him, the feeling of your impending release building with each thrust. As you sense yourself slipping over the edge, elation consuming you in its fiery embrace, you try to banish thoughts of his old minder from your thoughts. The sight of her is far from erotic, and you struggle to maintain focus amidst the conflicting desires of Alaida that tug at your consciousness.

"Heeseung, please," you plead, your voice a desperate cry for respite from the haunting images that threaten to intrude upon your pleasure. 

Relenting to your plea, Heeseung releases his hold on your head, his hips slowing their frenzied pace as he responds to your need for a change in position. With a deft movement, he tosses your legs over his shoulder, his hands gripping your hips firmly as he locks you in place, your focus now on him as he leans over to kiss you.

The messy buck of Heeseung's hips betrays his impending climax, his jaw slack and eyes screwed shut as he fights to maintain control. The sight of you, glistening and writhing before him, threatens to throw him over the edge, but he grinds his teeth, determined to hang on just long enough for you both to reach the peak together.

With a newfound sense of intensity, he resumes his actions, expertly rubbing your clit. The rawness infuses your body, sparking a fire that becomes hotter with each passing moment.

"Cum for me, baby. Do it," Heeseung orders through the veil of pleasure, his voice husky with want as he drives you to release. In this moment of shared intimacy, there is no place for doubt as you give in to the euphoria, your shouts combining with his as you both succumb to overpowering pleasure.

You clench around him as you cum for the third time tonight. Every muscle in your body tenses as you reach the heights of your pleasure. Heeseung's release joins yours, his seed shooting into you and coating your walls. The sensation of his warmth flooding your depths only serves to intensify your own climax, amplifying the euphoria that courses through your veins.

He kisses you as your heartbeat steadies, his tongue whirling in your mouth as he pumps slowly into you before pausing his hips to let the final flow of his cum sit deep inside you. There’s that shine of red light as you take all of him, all that he offers. 

"Y/N..." Jaeyun's voice breaks the intimate moment, a soft plea tinged with desperation as his fist drags down the door. You can almost hear the tears in his eyes and the sorrow in his voice as he realises he has lost you; the doll, defeated, reflects the anguish of being replaced, claimed by another.

Heeseung strokes your face gently, his touch a soothing balm to your conflicted soul. He sees the war in your eyes, the shift between lust and guilt. "He doesn't understand you like I do, baby," he murmurs, his voice a blend of affection and firmness. His words wrap around you, reassuring you of the unique connection you share. 

You battle within yourself as you feel Alaida settle inside of you. If she has chosen you, then that means she must have always been here with you, through everything, a silent passenger in your life. But now, thanks to Heeseung, she has made herself known, you’ve let her in to become one with you.

She feels both euphoric and dangerous, her presence a heady mix of power and peril. Your heart aches to leap out of your chest, to be with Jaeyun, to comfort him in his pain, to tell him you're sorry and that it will never happen again. Yet, her yearning to stay with Heeseung, who cradles you with possessive tenderness, is overwhelmingly strong.

You realise you will need to find a balance between you and Alaida if this is how you are to live. You can sense the darkness within her, the same ominous aura that surrounds Heeseung, but you cling to your humanity, determined not to lose yourself completely. If she is to stay, she must let you take the lead.

And right now, you’re in desperate need to fix this.

Heeseung sees your demeanour change and slowly slides out of you with a wet slick, his cock glistening with your juices. Running his fingers through your hair which for some reason opens the floodgates of your eyes, the tears that you couldn’t weep earlier when facing Soonyeol suddenly come crashing down. 

“Y/N, why are you crying?” he asks puzzled, shushing you softly, “You wanted this life and now you have it. You should be happy.”

His tone is understanding but you can sense the annoyance underlining his words. He knows you’re still a human but he didn’t think you would be crying for the sake of a girl who you hardly knew. But it wasn’t just her you are crying for, it’s her dolls, your dolls. How are you meant to live happily in this house when all of them but Heeseung will probably detest you?

Even the thought sends a new rush of disdain to your heart, eliciting another sob from your lips. “I didn’t want it like this, the others will hate me and I can’t live like that,” you cry, sucking in sharp breaths to self-soothe yourself and prevent yourself from hyperventilating. Although you’re going through emotional turmoil, it’s nice to know that you’re still you after all.

“If they hate you, I’ll kill them,” Heeseung says, shrugging his shoulders and wiping your tears away, “If any of them even look at you the wrong way I will make sure they suffer.”

You don’t want that, you want nothing but their happiness inside this mansion and with what you’ve done, that might be hard for them to achieve. If Heeseung kills them or tortures them in any way, then it would only hurt you more. The tears flow freely as you think about the dolls and their fate, clinging to Heeseung’s wrists as you squeeze. “Heeseung, please,” you beg with the Prince, glancing up at him in hopes the waterworks are enough to persuade him to leave them unharmed.

He can’t blame them for hating you when you banished their lover to the hollow cell of the porcelain doll.

Rolling his eyes, he huffs out a frustrated growl. “Okay, I hear you, baby. Stop fucking crying.” His voice is curt and authoritative, but as you cower slightly, he softens. He places a tender kiss on your nose, his demeanour shifting from unimpressed to slightly more compassionate. Now that you harbour his first love in your heart, he’s become a bit more lenient with you.

“Just close your eyes and cover your eyes,” he murmurs, brushing a stray lock of hair from your face. “Don’t move until I tell you to, okay?”

Obeying, you nod and close your eyes, your hands pressed against the canals of your ears. You cannot hear or see anything but just to make sure, Heeseung places his hands over yours and presses tight. The pressure on your head is sore but you grit and bear it.

He keeps you like this for a while, the very faint sound of his voice vibrating in your skull as the decibels run from his mouth down his doll form. You wonder if this is it? If he has found his Alaida, surely he could just whisk you out of this body and into a doll just as he had done Soonyeol. Your soul is merged with his lovers but that doesn’t mean you’re safe. Maybe he is already sick of you, maybe-

“Open your eyes, Princess,” he utters lowly, releasing his grasp from your head and kissing your forehead. 

He can’t get rid of you, because he loves you. Not as Alaida but as Y/N. His actions speak what he refuses to. There’s a new version of Heeseung standing in front of you, the version you witnessed as he fucked you a few weeks ago, the demon in him relenting to make way for his humanity to shine through. Heeseung said you were his and only his and he meant every word of it.

That does beg to question: what he has just done, if nothing to you?

You blink your eyes open and strain to focus your hearing. Silence greets you—no more cries from Jaeyun, no banging on the door from Jongseong, nothing at all. The first emotion you feel is fear, a petrifying dread that he might have taken them away from you. You cannot bear to lose them because then what was all of this for?

"Heeseung," you whisper, your voice trembling. "Where are they? What have you done?"

Heeseung's eyes soften momentarily as he strokes your cheek, but there's a sinister glint in his eyes. "They're fine," he reassures you, his voice low and deceptively soothing. "I haven’t hurt them... yet. I’ve rewound their soul clock to an hour ago. Anything that happened within the past hour is lost on them."

A shiver runs down your spine at his words, a stark reminder of the power he wields and the casual way he manipulates the lives around him. "What if they remember?" you ask, trying to keep the fear out of your voice.

Heeseung's smile is cold, his grip on your cheek tightening slightly. "They won’t, but if they do... well, I have ways of ensuring their silence." His tone is almost playful, but the underlying menace is unmistakable. “But if we want to keep this between us right now, we have some cleaning up to do.”

Swiftly, he moves to grab Soonyeol’s body, carrying her with disconcerting ease to the freestanding wardrobe and stuffing her in there. You sit in stunned silence, watching as he disposes of the lifeless form with a casual efficiency that makes your blood run cold. The contrast between his tenderness towards you and his ruthless treatment of others leaves you reeling.

You can't believe how easily everything has turned in your favour, or how effortlessly Heeseung wields his power. His dominance is both intoxicating and terrifying, and you realise just how deeply you're entangled in his web.

Heeseung closes the wardrobe door with a finality that sends a shiver down your spine. He turns back to you, his expression a mix of satisfaction and possessiveness. "See, Princess? There's nothing we can't handle together," he says, his voice low and smooth. “We will keep her in there for now until I move her car.  Can you distract them, baby?” 

Picking up your clothes, he hands them to you before getting himself dressed. Time is not on his side before Jongseong starts asking questions.

You look around the space and breathe a sigh of relief. Of course, it’s wrong to want your cake and eat it too, but nothing feels as good as this moment. This house, the dolls you love so deeply—they are all yours to own. And you have one Lord of the Flies to thank.

“Heeseung?” you begin, hopping off the table and walking to hug him tight. “Thank you.”

Shaking his head, he wraps his arms around you and kisses the crown of your head. “I will give you anything you want in this life. Anything for my girl.” Drawing back, you stare up at him, any emotion but gratification and love now vanished—it's amazing how quickly a guilty conscience can be smothered by love.

“Thank you for bringing her to me,” he whispers. You think he is talking to you directly, gratitude flowing in his words as you brought his Princess here. But he is talking to Alaida. The ancient demon knew you would be the perfect person to love Heeseung just as she had, and that is why you were chosen.

As you finish dressing, Heeseung's eyes follow your movements with a predatory intensity. “Distract them well, baby,” he says, his voice softening into a dangerous whisper. “Make sure they don’t suspect a thing. And put this doll back where you found it.”

Heeseung reaches around to grab the doll and kisses it softly, finalising his relationship with the soul within. He hands her to you with care, much more tender than the body she possessed. You like to think that the fondness he had for Soonyeol wasn’t just in the hopes that she was his long-lost lover but because they formed a bond. Perhaps that has more to do with your hope that Beelzebub withholds some humanity inside him in the form of Heeseung.

“Lock the door when you leave,” he asks, planting one final kiss on your forehead before retreating to the entrance to rid the house of Soonyeol’s car before the other dolls see.

You hold Soonyeol carefully, feeling the weight of the soul it contains. The doll's eyes seem to stare back at you, empty yet full of a lingering presence. You exit the room and lock it as instructed, cradling her in your arms as you walk up the hallway. The walk there is tiresome, in all honesty, you would just shove her on the first available spot but that’s just Alaida talking, you want to give her the respect she deserves. It’s the least you could do considering you did this to her.

Placing it gently in its original spot, you take a moment to steady yourself. You straighten her purple-tinted dress and fix her hair fondly, hoping that Soonyeol could at least find some peace inside the beautiful girl. The blood from Soonyeol’s body is still marked on the doll, so you quickly lick your thumb and wipe it away, the red staining your fingers.

Staring down at the blood, you feel compelled to suck the crimson up like a vampire in need of a feast. The metallic scent fills your nostrils, intoxicating and primal. You bring your thumb back to your lips and sip the blood, savouring her taste on your buds; she is sweet, just like her soul. The warmth of the blood sends a shiver of delight through you, a macabre indulgence that leaves you yearning for more.

Just in time, Jongseong appears beside you. Your stomach churns with dread, wondering if he would remember anything at all from the previous hour. Panic flares momentarily in your chest, but you force it down, steeling yourself.

To your relief, Jongseong doesn’t seem upset. Instead, he kisses your forehead tenderly, his lips lingering with a brotherly warmth. He gently wipes away the tears that had crusted on your face from earlier. “You’re going to miss this place, huh?” he asks, oblivious to the truth surrounding him.

Now is the time to put those drama classes you took when you were 14 to good use and fake it until you make it. Nodding pitifully, you pout up at him, your eyes shimmering with feigned sorrow. “I’m going to miss all of you more than the cleaning, I’ll say that,” you giggle, reaching for his hand, interlocking your fingers together.

The action makes Jongseong mirror your pout, his expression softening as he buys every word you say. “Fuck, I think we’ll all miss you, Jaeyun mostly though.” He goes to say more but he stops himself, making you tilt your head in wonder. A flicker of something crosses his face, a hint of a secret he’s holding back. 

Brushing it off, he shakes his head and smiles, trying to dispel whatever thoughts had crossed his mind. “Soonyeol isn’t home yet. Do you want a cup of coffee while we wait?”

This is your chance to keep them distracted, to lure them away from this side of the mansion while Heeseung cleans up your mess. With a beaming grin, you shake your head in agreement, “I would love one. Let’s grab the others.”

Pulling him in the direction of the kitchen, he wraps an arm around you and walks alongside you, unknowing of what is to come. You glance back at Soonyeol and suddenly, you see a tear fall from her ceramic eyes. She’s crying because she is watching you steal her life, her love, and she cannot do one thing about it.

A smirk plasters on your face and the red in your eye gleams at her sorrow, happiness filling your chest as you finally come to terms with the fact that your dreams have finally come true.

You’re home.

taglist: @nshmrarki @kgneptun @addictedtohobi @parksunghoonsgf @chaewonshoney @chiiiiiiiiis @lilyuwon @rayofsunshineeee @moon7jay @erehkinnie30 @brownsugarbaybee @minniejenseo @woninluv @jaysluvs @fakeuwus @capri-cuntz @ash024 @who-tf-soddhi @bambangan @vousty @heeseungspookie @alvojake @yorukoshii @haechonly @riftanswhore @emi-en @branchrkive @featjunranghae @thejjrl @nyxtwixx @sunghoonnsupremacy @nctislifue @itsnikitty @enhypenlovre

#enhypen smut #enha smut #heeseung smut #enhypen x reader #enha x reader #heeseung x reader #tdh #aj writes

[azullumi]

JESUS, TAKE THE WHEEL ?!

premise — to put it simply, hsr men driving. characters — boothill, sunday, aventurine, veritas ratio, jing yuan, and blade content tags — small mentions of reader, probably fluff, not proofread, i don't know how to tag this please | wc: 0.6k ; headcanons

note from me — this idea was brought to me after nearly crashing and getting multiple heart attacks while my dad was driving

BOOTHILL, races with the wind that it feels like you left your soul somewhere in the road—literally a wild spirit who seems to enjoy the feeling of the breeze on his skin. He probably got you lost one time too, or maybe twice, or thrice. He just loves fast cars and faster chases, likes the thrill of it (much to your dismay if you’re a cautious person). He’s probably cussed someone out for cutting him off his lane which led to him nearly crashing when he pressed the brakes suddenly. Despite his reckless driving habits, his quick thinking and reflexes keeps him out of harm.

SUNDAY, perfect law-abiding citizen—follows the traffic rules, doesn’t go past the speed limit, never crashes, never gets pulled over, you’re in the safest hands and you can trust the entirety of your life on him. You have a good road trip, a great driver, and someone who you can easily talk to. It’s perfect. He probably has a playlist ready with the most of it being his sister’s songs, playing and listening to it as he drives, often humming along with the melody.

AVENTURINE, drives like there’s no tomorrow when he’s alone but drives like the most responsible and careful driver whenever there’s someone with him in the car. He likes driving during the night despite the risk of it (and that’s honestly the point); he does love the quiet streets and the solitude he gets, taking long drives to often clear his mind or just drive somewhere where he wants to be, often taking the scenic route. There are times that he drives in complete silence, deep in thought, and taking random turns.

VERITAS RATIO, just your normal and average sane driver. Literally it’s all just normal with him that it feels so wrong. He’s quite the careful driver but is easily annoyed when someone cuts off his lane and you’ll have to deal with a rambling doctor that calls people who have no driving etiquettes foolish and reckless. He strictly follows the rules of the road, but doesn’t hesitate in voicing out his frustrations at those who don’t. Other than that, everything is fine. He rarely listens to music, however, opting to listen to educational podcasts or the radio instead—he says it helps in keeping him focused.

JING YUAN, bold of you to even assume he’s driving; he doesn’t drive, or he rarely does. He’s a passenger princess, a shotgun queen, the backseat sleeper,—preferring to sleep on his seat than focus his eyes on the road. If he ever drives, however, it’s slow and careful. He’ll reason that there’s nothing to rush for and that you all have the time in the world, and you don’t know if you’re supposed to accept his reasoning, especially when you’re going to be late. The chance of him falling asleep while driving is higher than the chance of arriving at your destination early (a 10-minute drive easily becomes a 30-minute one and no, it’s not because of the traffic).

BLADE, believe it or not but he’s, if not the most, but one of the trusted drivers. While he does go past the speed limit sometimes and maybe he does have to swerve the car that you’ll fly off your seat (if not without your seatbelt) ever so often, you never die while he’s the one on the driver seat—thankfully. Surprisingly, he does wear his seatbelt and even urges you to wear yours (even if he didn’t, you’ll have to because you have nothing else to hold on to). The most silent car ride to ever exist though as he’ll only speak when you’ll ask him something, otherwise you’re left on your own with a conversation in the wind. Nevertheless, you’ll arrive at your destination in one piece. Not until the mara strikes.

FELIIII, a lovely mention to the beautiful and lovely @dr-felitas !! i'm getting back to writing now since i'm back from vacation (which means i can do anything and everything i want, but not including ghosting 🔥) ANYWAYS i would like to say thank you for always being patient with me and my replies ,, like my bad g 🙏 i really appreciate your presence in my life and your constant understanding, and i know i already told you this but you're a very warm and comforting person and i only hope for the best things to come in your life (i know love and beauty exists because you exist and you're full of it). i will support you in each and every one of your decisions, despite how bad or stupid it can be. don't let anything hold you back boo, never listen to your haters or your opps 🗣, you're still young and you have all the time in the world to experience meaningful moments (even heartbreaking ones). so go talk to that girl bae <33 no matter what happens, i'll always be here for you. ily lots mwaaaa

© azullumi — do not plagiarize, copy, repost, nor translate any of my works.

#hsr x reader #hsr imagines #aventurine #hsr aventurine #aventurine x reader #aventurine headcanons #boothill x reader #hsr boothill #boothill headcanons #sunday x reader #hsr sunday #sunday headcanons #blade x reader #hsr blade #blade headcanons #jing yuan hsr #jing yuan x reader #ratio x reader #ratio hsr #hsr #azul.writes

[fastandcarlos]

He Takes Care Of You On Your Period : ̗̀➛ F1 Reaction

: ̗̀➛ Max Verstappen

Lots of cuddles are on the menu whenever you’re on your period, Max never leaves your side, making sure that he holds you as best as he can to take away the pain. He’s incredibly attentive at the best of times but he takes extra care during your time of the month, keeping things slow and moving as calmly as he can to protect your body. Need a squeeze? He’s there. Tummy need massaging? He’s by your side before you even finish asking him. ‘I’ll do whatever I can to make you feel better,’ he repeatedly tells you, knowing that all the pain that you go through is never truly your fault.

: ̗̀➛ Lando Norris

Treats, treats and more treats come your way from Lando whenever you’re on your period. He’s still a little lost sometimes as to what the right thing to do is, however one thing he does know that can solve most situations is chocolate – so that’s what he does. Lando brings the comfort to help you relax, he finds your favourite treats, sets up your living room so its nice and cosy and finds the cheesiest film that he can to send your hormones into overdrive – although secretly he loves making you cry at a film so he can be there to wipe away your tears.

: ̗̀➛ Charles LeClerc

Bed is the only place Charles will let you be when you’re on your period, he’s there for you whenever you need him. It kills him seeing you in so much pain so he encourages you to rest as much as you can. ‘What do you want?’ He’ll question as soon as he sees you moving, leaping up to help you out. If he could take away the pain, he would in a heartbeat, so instead Charles tries to give you as easy a life as possible whilst you’re suffering, sneaking into bed for a cuddle with you whenever he finds himself with five minutes to himself too.

: ̗̀➛ Carlos Sainz

He’s practically glued to your side when you’re on your period, particularly if you’re visiting work with him too. Carlos likes to make use of the extra benefits of being a driver, giving you a comfy bed to lay down on or sneaking into the hospitality lounge to boil a kettle so that he can fix you up a hot water bottle. ‘Just for you,’ he’ll sweetly smile down at you, placing the bottle to the exact spot that you point to, showing him where it hurts. Gently, Carlos tends to then sit beside you, letting you rest into his side.

: ̗̀➛ George Russell

King of supplies is the title you charmingly gave George the first time you were on your period, and ever since then, he’s lived up to his title. He can tell by your voice alone when your period has arrived, making the call to the shop to get everything you need. He doesn’t care about the stares (and sometimes the photos!) as long as he’s taking care of his girl that’s what matters the most. His cupboards are full of sweets, pads, fresh pyjamas, everything that you could ever need to make sure your period comes and goes as smoothly as possible.

: ̗̀➛ Lewis Hamilton

He’s almost like a mind reader when you’re on your period, Lewis knows exactly what you want before you even do. After a long day at work, all you want to do is rest with your cramps, and as you walk through the door, you can see the steam coming from the bathroom door. A proud Lewis will stand and smile as you enter, ‘welcome home baby,’ he’d whisper every time, showing you his handiwork. A soothing bath, candles lit, gentle music in the background, everything you’d ever need to take your mind off of your sore tummy for a while.

: ̗̀➛ Daniel Ricciardo

He’s the sweetest soul when it comes to your period, all of Daniel’s attention is on you and the things he can do to help you. Daniel treats you like the most delicate thing in the world, cuddling you so tightly you can think about nothing else but his strong arms holding onto you, or telling you a funny joke to make you smile again. You’re sure if you look close enough you can actually see his heartbreaking when he watches you in pain, but secretly you somewhat enjoy your periods as it makes you the centre of his universe for a few days.

: ̗̀➛ Logan Sargeant

He was the perfect pillow at the best of times, but especially during your period, Logan was exactly what you needed. He dropped everything to hold you into his side carefully, running his hand gently against your stomach. ‘Are you comfy?’ Logan would whisper down to you every few minutes, pressing a kiss against the top of your head as soon as you hummed in reply to him. Despite how busy he was, he’d lay with you for hours in the hope that it would make you feel better, doing whatever he could to make your period that little more bearable.

: ̗̀➛ Alex Albon

All other plans are cancelled for Alex when you’re on your period, you are his priority the moment he sees you suffering. Despite you protesting that you’re absolutely fine, Alex refuses to believe it. Whilst you’re still in bed he darts to the shop to make sure that he’s got everything that the two of you will need for the day before joining you in bed as you begin to wake. It’s where you both stay for most of the day, with Alex not leaving your side, paying attention to everything and being an absolute dream taking care of you.

: ̗̀➛ Lance Stroll

You barely had time to breathe with Lance around when you were around, he was on your case all the time. If you were ready for some tablets to take away the pain, Lance would be there with them and a glass of water, or if you needed your hot water filling, he’d take it as soon as it felt too cold to him. Sometimes you forgot he was your boyfriend with how caring Lance was towards you, he was terrified that something would cause you pain so he wanted to be there to fix anything that he could for you straight away.

 ˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗

#f1 #f1 imagine #formula 1 #formula 1 x reader #f1 reaction #f1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 x you #max verstappen #max verstappen imagine #lando norris #lando norris imagine #charles leclerc #charles leclerc imagine #carlos sainz #carlos sainz imagine #george russell #george russell imagine #lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton imagine #alex albon #alex albon imagine #logan sargeant #logan sargeant imagine #lance stroll #lance stroll imagine #daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo imagine

[thefallennightmare]

Caged In: Noah Sebastian[One Shot]

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Pairings: Noah Sebastian x Reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, swearing, slight smut, talks about anxiety and depression.

Summary: Noah feels himself falling deeper into the darkness and only one person can pull him out.

Authors Note: I'd felt compelled to write about Noah's mental health break and Just Pretend acoustic since I first heard it. I hope you all love it.

Tags: @missduffsblog @hayleylatour @sleepyomens @loeytuan98 @artificialbreezy @marvelousmal @bngurngheart @lma1986 @dsireland86 @wild-child-7747 @calleyx13 @illmakeyousaywow @jaded-and-hollow-souls @thatchickwiththecamera @concreteemo @cookiesupplier @whenthesummerdies @sammyjoeee @madomens @xxkittenkissesxx @burning-outx @shayzillaaaa @darling-millicent-aubrey @flowery-mess @badomensls @reyadawn @exitwoundsx @malice-ov-mercy @princesspeach-00 @lookwhatitcost @collective-heartbreak @klutzy-kay24 @sorrowsofsilence @sweetlittlekitsune @rxdlstgn @shilohrosechicken @itsafullmoon @toospooktocute @respectfulrebel @cloudykoookie @niicoleleigh @thisbicc @pathion @themortaljessica @tashka @its-inourblood @amelia-acero @thescarlettvvitch @mitchhbitch

“Noah?” I called out into the vast darkness of our home. 

The old bones of the home creaked with each step as I walked farther into the darkness, a deep frown settling on my face. I was certain he was home, the text I received from him hours ago told me so. 

My Love 🖤: I’m going to lay down for a bit. Worked too hard in the studio.

I’d been out all afternoon with friends, catching up with them after not seeing them for a few months. I was hesitant to leave due to everything that came to light with Noah but he assured me with an almost there smile that he’d be alright while I was gone. He would keep himself busy in the studio. 

“Noah?” 

My voice met silence as I slowly ascended the stairs, realizing he wasn’t on the main level. It was so quiet, I wasn’t sure if Jesse or Michael were home. Both of their bedroom doors were shut and knowing that Jesse always kept his door open when he was home, it was clear he wasn't. 

Softly knocking on Michael’s door, he opened it with a head full of messy bed head. 

“Sorry,” I frowned when I remembered it was almost late evening. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”  

He gave me a reassuring smile. “It’s alright, Y/N. You got my text?” 

I nodded. Michael’s text was the reason why I’d cut my girls night early. 

“Is he in the studio?” I asked. 

“No,” Michael shook his head. “He met up with Ash for a lesson but I haven’t heard him come home.”

“He told me he was going to lay down,” I pulled out my phone to check Noah’s location. 

At Home since 2:30 p.m.

“Noah’s been home all day,” I said. 

Now it was Michael who frowned. “Why would he lie to us?”

“I have a feeling I know why,” I sighed. 

The frown never left my face at this point so with a small nod, I walked down to the other end of the hallway towards mine and Noah’s bedroom. I could have checked here first, but the SOS text I received from Michael had me wanting to check in with him first. 

As I approached our bedroom door, a soft sound touched my ears and I felt my world turn upside down. My heart dropped to the pits of my stomach as I hesitated reaching for the knob. I could feel the tears burning in the corners of my eyes and let out a long breath.

We couldn’t ignore this any longer. The hiding, the pretending, and the lies needed to stop.

Pushing through the bedroom door, I bypassed the made bed and entered the ensuite bathroom, nearly faltering at the sight in front of me. 

Oh, Noah. 

The bathroom light was off, only lit up from the moonlight breaking its way through the glass of the large window above the bathtub. His large frame slumped against the shower wall, his toned and defined back to me. The intricate lines of his tattoo shivering underneath the water that most likely ran cold. Both of his hands were spread widely apart against the wall, keeping him anchored while his forehead hung low. Droplets of water fell from the ends of his hair, down to the water pooling at his feet. 

Over the noise of the shower, soft cries echoed in the marbled space and Noah’s shoulders shook violently as the sobs tore through him. I stripped out of my clothes pretty quickly, not bothering to take my makeup off as I stepped into the large shower and wrapped my arms around him from behind. 

Noah’s cries seized for a moment and I knew that he would try to pretend everything was fine. 

“It’s alright,” I cooed, placing a kiss to the middle of his shoulder blades. 

One of his hands reached for mine wrapped around him and brought it to his lips. 

“You’re home early.” 

I rested my cheek against his back. “You needed me.” 

“Angel,” Noah breathed. 

Pretty quickly, I slipped underneath his other extended arm so now I was facing him. Glancing up through the chilled shower water that hung on my eyelashes, I sucked in a breath when I noticed how bloodshot Noah’s eyes were. 

“Oh, love,” I carefully caressed his cheek. 

He hadn’t shaved in weeks and I desperately wanted to feel the ginger hair that lined around his mouth tickling the sensitive skin of my thighs. 

Those almond eyes that were always filled with love, wonder, and light had begun to dull into nothing; darkness like the feeling that was beginning to dig its claws into Noah. I’d been afraid for weeks now that while I was away with work or other things that the darkness would swallow him whole. Which is why Michael texted me earlier, he’d become worried for his best friend. 

“I’m fine,” his voice shook. 

“No you’re not,” I gently shook my head. “You’re far from fine, Noah. You can’t keep this facade up.” 

I felt him beginning to slip away from me, like he had many times before. Whenever I tried to get close to him, he would push me away with the lie that nothing is wrong with him. 

“Stop,” I almost begged while wrapping my arms around his neck. “Please don’t pull away from me.” 

Noah stood frozen underneath the chill of the water, the heat long gone and telling me he had been in the shower for quite some time. Behind those dark eyes told an even darker story of a broken man crying out for help. The war that waged in his mind was one he couldn’t continue to battle on his own. 

“I can’t,” Noah shook his head. “You don’t deserve my demons. Your light is too pure for them, angel.” 

My shoulders fell when he pulled away from me completely, the space between us was something I’d become accustomed too. Every time I tried to get close to him, have him open up to me, Noah created an even larger space between us. 

“That’s not fair,” I wrapped my arms around my chilled body. “You don’t get to make that decision, Noah. It’s in our fucking vows that I’ll help you through these dark times.”

His face twitched and he cast his eyes down to his feet, a silent way of telling me he was done with the conversation. I did my best to not let my anger over take me because this wasn’t something he deserved. It wasn't his fault that the demons were winning. I needed to be his light in the darkness. 

For a brief moment, I drank in the sight of his bare body in front of me as the droplets of water ran down the grooves of his muscles. I followed one particular drop of water as it fell over his cock and I bit my lip. It had been weeks since we were intimate last because Noah wasn’t at the right mental headspace for it. I never pushed him, letting him take his time. But as the weeks went on and the heated kisses turned into barely there pecks, my heart was beginning to fear the worst. 

“Do you still love me?” I blurted out. 

Noah’s head snapped up. “What?” 

Turning my head to the side, I let out a shaky breath and wiped away the water from my face. 

“I didn’t mean to. This isn’t about me.” 

My name fell in a quiet whisper as I left Noah standing in the shower alone and wrapped one of the large towels around my frame, doing my best not to shiver at the chill I felt deep within my bones.

It was true. This wasn’t about me. I was supposed to be comforting Noah, not asking him a question I already knew the answer to. But I let those demons that were plaguing Noah affect me. I knew better than to let those win. 

Turning swiftly on my heels, ready to go back into the bathroom to apologize, I nearly dropped my towel when I saw Noah’s tall frame standing over me. He wore his towel loosely around his hips and the wet tendrils of his maple hair fell into his eyes. His broad chest rose and fell with each deep breath as his hands quickly found my hips, yanking me into his chest. 

“Don’t ever question my love for you, angel. Alright?” 

His voice was soft, which surprised me. I expected him to be upset and gruff with my accusation. 

“I didn’t mean to,” my bottom lip wobbled. “I can feel you physically and emotionally pulling away from me, love. I guess I needed that reassurance.” 

I felt a subtle kiss to my forehead and found myself grasping at the sensation it filled me with. 

“I love you so much, Y/N,” Noah’s eyes glistened as he looked down at me. 

We both sniffled at the same time and I molded even farther into his embrace. 

“I love you too,” I proclaimed. 

“I know,” he nodded once. “I also know that I’ve been pulling away from you and I don’t mean to. The demons in my mind keep telling me that no one cares. They keep whispering that no one will be there to save me.” 

“That’s not true,” I began, to which he cut me off by wrapping a hand around the side of my neck. 

“I know that. I’m trying to fight against them but it’s been so hard with everything going on. I feel like my mind and body are in a constant battle of what’s right,” Noah divulged with a tight grip on my neck, almost as if he was afraid I’d be the one to slip away. 

“I’m locked in a cage with those demons. They keep beating me down, not letting me take a fucking breath,” his nose scrunched in an effort to keep the tears away. “They’re telling me to leave you because you deserve a husband that is home all the time, not on the road most of the year. You deserve a man that can give you all of his time.”

“Noah,” I grasped at the thick muscles of his arms, my heart breaking at the sight of my husband looking so defeated. 

I’d known Noah since we were teens and given everything he'd gone through, I’d never seen him like this before. He’d always been the type of man that put others first, took care of his family before himself, and it became clear that I might not have been doing my part of a wife and taking care of him.  

The chilled night air crept in through our open bedroom window, the curtains dancing to the music of the crickets outside and our gentle cries. 

“I’ve lied to everyone. Pretended that everything is fine when it’s not. I’m crumbling into a man I don’t recognize anymore and I’m so fucking scared,” Noah burying his face int he crook of my neck, his tears mixing with the water from the shower that had yet to dry. 

“Will you wait for me until I let you down?” 

With a loving embrace, I began to sway Noah in my arms while his face was still hiding in my neck. 

“I’m not going anywhere, Noah,” I promised. “I’m right here with you. Through the darkness. I’ll do whatever I can to pull you out.” 

The silence from him was deafening, an eerie feeling that made you tip toe because you were afraid one wrong move would set it off. All of us knew Noah was a ticking time bomb and we all were careful with what we said around him. We gave him the space when he needed it, we didn’t push him when we knew he was lying about his feelings, but when Jesse and I shared a look the other night we knew we couldn’t tip toe around Noah anymore. 

“Fucking bullshit!” Noah slammed the fridge door shut; the condiments in the door rattling against each other. 

Jesse and I looked away from our card game at the kitchen table to see Noah slamming the kitchen cabinets now. 

“Love,” I said softly. “Is everything alright?” 

His eyes sliced into mine. “No, Y/N. I can’t find anything to eat in this fucking house.” 

Jesse stilled next to me, ready to be on the offense if he needed. Noah rarely cussed, especially at me. But I patted Jesse’s knee softly underneath the table, letting him know it was alright. 

This wasn’t Noah. We knew it. 

“I thought you went shopping earlier,” I said. 

Noah ran a hand through his hair. “No, it was your turn.” 

My brows peaked. “Noah, you told me this morning that you would go after your therapy session.” 

He didn’t utter a word, simply stuffed his hands in the pockets of his joggers before stomping up the stairs. 

“Did you skip your session again?!” I yelled after him only to be met with the slamming of our bedroom door. 

That night Jesse, Michael, and I all talked about how we would start helping Noah because we were hurting seeing him in such a dark place. Earlier tonight, Michael’s text gave me immediate fear which is why I cut my night early. 

Michael: He broke his guitar, Y/N. It’s in pieces in the studio. I don’t know what happened but there’s blood on the carpet.

Back in the solace of our bedroom, I gently lifted Noah’s left hand to finally get a look at the deep cut along the tattoos of his best friend's name. 

Keaton. 

Thankfully with the shower, the blood seemed to stop but not wanting to risk it, I led Noah over to our bed and made him sit on the edge. As I stepped away from him, ready to get the first aid kit, his arms yanked me back to him which caused my towel to drop to the floor. 

“Please don’t leave me,” he choked out. 

My fingers worked through the drying knots of his hair as I bent down to kiss his head. “I’m not going anywhere, love. I’m right here with you.” 

We stayed like that for quite some time, Noah sitting on the bed while I stood in front of him; his arms caccooning around me. At that moment, no one else in the world mattered, just Noah and I. Albeit our love might have felt at a standstill the last few weeks, we both didn’t need to fear anymore that the darkness would encompass us whole. We began to realize that in that darkness, flowers would bloom and we could grow. 

“What happened to your guitar?” I asked. 

Noah pressed a gentle kiss to the skin of my stomach and I shivered, body ignited with the contact. 

“I was working on a song for you and I couldn’t get it right,” he admitted with a disappointed sigh. 

He glanced up at me, resting his chin on my stomach as I peered down at him. The roughness of his fingers grazed over the growing heated skin of my back and I let the stress of wondering if he was alright ease away. 

“I didn’t mean to scare you.” 

I brushed back the hair from his face. “It’s alright, love. I’m glad I’m here though. Is there anything you need from me?” 

Another kiss to my heated skin; this time along the valley of my breasts. “Just you.”

“I should wrap your hand, in case it bleeds again,” I breathed when his warm lips continued to leave marks all over my skin. 

Noah hummed in response and then pulled me down to the bed with him so we could lay in a mess of locked and naked limbs together. I lay on my back as he buried his face in my neck yet again, breathing me in. The head of his cock brushed along the side of my thigh and I let out a hushed moan, desperately wanting to feel it slip between my folds; it had been so long. 

“Angel,” Noah grazed his fingers over my collar bone. “I crave to feel you again but my brain isn’t in the right headspace.” 

I lifted his chin to force him to look at me. “I won’t push you, Noah. I’m here for you whatever you need.” 

Oh so slowly, I saw the light behind the dark depths of his eyes begin to flicker. 

“Can I play that song for you?” He asked. 

My lips curled up into a smile. “You don’t even have to ask me, love.” 

With a kiss to my lips, one that I wasn’t eager to let go off, Noah slipped away from me to get dressed. 

“I still haven’t cleaned up the mess in the studio. Give me a few minutes?” He said after slipping on the house communal Chief hoodie. 

“Take your time. I’m going to get dressed.” 

While Noah was gone, I dressed in a pair of thin cotton panties and one of his shirts, his scent immediately filling my senses. I went about lighting a few incense sticks, the ones that always calmed Noah down and settled into bed when he stepped back inside. With the moonlight casted over his face, I could see more of that light return as soon as he smelled the incense. 

I patted the spot next to me. “Saved you a spot.” 

Noah practically bounced on the mattress next to me, my giggles echoing around the room. He sat across from me, letting the guitar rest along his lap as he stared intently at me. 

“What?” I shifted underneath the blanket. 

“I missed that laugh,” he blinked. “I’ll never fucking forgive myself for being the reason you stopped laughing like that.” 

My lips parted to speak but he shook his head, silencing me. “I haven’t been the best husband the last few weeks and I know no matter how many times I apologize, it won’t be enough to make up for how I treated you and the guys. It’s not fair to any of you.” 

I nodded as he continued. “Jesse mentioned that you’re worried about me going overseas for all those summer festivals.” 

It was true. 

Noah would be gone for weeks while I stayed back home for work and I couldn’t stop biting my nails with worry about how he would be. I knew everyone would take care of him but it did nothing to ease my own demons. 

“I just want to make sure you’ll be alright,” I bit my lip with nerves. 

Noah tucked a piece of hair behind my ear. “I’m not going.” 

“Wh-what?” I stuttered. 

“I wanted to talk with you about it first. With the stress of the CJ OST release and everything the last two years, I need a mental break. I need time to rest and do the things we always talk about but never get to do,” Noah said. 

“So you’ll just cancel all the upcoming shows?” I asked, fingers grazing over the tattoos on his arm as he still cupped my cheek. 

“I’ll still play UPHEAVAL and INKARNATION but I don’t think I should go overseas. I need to get my mind right again. I need to get back into therapy and talk to someone about these feelings. I know I have you but-.” 

“Sometimes it’s better to talk to someone else,” I finished for him with a kiss to the inside of his palm. “Whatever you decide, Noah. I’ll support you. Although I do think this is a great idea.” 

Noah agreed and for the first time in a long while, the smile that I fell in love with slowly crept to his face. I was captivated by it that I nearly missed his thumb brush away a tear, suddenly avoiding eye contact with me. 

“I know the pain you hide behind the smile on your face,” I tapped his nose. 

He playfully rolled his eyes before adjusting the guitar on his lap, strumming a few random notes.. “Well, funny you mention Just Pretend.”

I pursed my lips with confusion. 

“Remember all those years ago when I told you there was a demo for it but I didn’t want you to hear it because I thought it wasn’t any good?”

The memory was clear as day in my mind. We’d just moved into this house with Michael and Jesse, two weeks after Noah and I had our secret wedding. We sat on the floor of this bedroom as he played for me Just Pretend; at the time what I thought was the original and only version. Besides the rest of the guys, I was the first one to hear the song in its entirety. 

“What about it?” 

Noah let out a long breath before the beautifully haunting melody of our song began to fill the empty space of air between us. 

“I'm so afraid that the walls that I have made have locked me in I'm not okay, but I can try my best to just pretend.”

Immediately I picked up on the change of lyrics; these ones cutting even more deep than the original. 

“So will you wait me out until I let you down? So will you wait me out until I let you down?”

I sucked in a breath when the words he cried into my shoulder earlier suddenly made sense. Unsure if he knew or not, Noah’s body began to sway with his music. 

“I can wait for you at the bottom. I can stay away if you want me to. I could wait for years if I gotta. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.” 

Quickly, I glanced down to the tattoo on the inside of my forearm. 

Heaven knows I aint getting over you.

“I know the pain that you hide behind the smile on your face. And not a day goes by that I don’t wish it’d go away. So will you wait me out. Until I let you down? So will you wait me out. Until I let you down?”

I hastily wiped away the tears as they hung on my lashes, doing my best to not let the sobs overcome me. He sat criss crossed on the bed, the rose tattoo on his knee brushing against mine. 

“I can wait for you at the bottom. I can stay away if you want me to. I could wait for years if I gotta. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.”

Noah’s eyes had been closed thus far but it was as if he needed to make sure I was still here, listening to him pour his heart out for me; like he did all those years ago. When our eyes met, I gave him a reassuring nod, urging him to continue.

“Can we try again when we’re not so different? Can we make amends? Why can’t we just pretend?” 

I couldn’t stop watching the way his fingers strummed against the strings of the guitar. The silver colors of the moonlight highlighted the sharpness of his cheek bones, down to his plump lips as they sang our song. 

“Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy? Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy?”

“Always, my love,” I breathed, pulling my knees to my chest.

The corners of Noah’s lips turned up. “I can wait for you at the bottom. I can stay away if you want me to. I could wait for years if I gotta. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you.”

Two years and a house full of love and laughter later, here Noah and I sat in the same position as he sang me his original demo for Just Pretend. My heart beat wildly in my chest, the noise roaring in my ears, as he finished out the song with a long, unsteady breath. 

“Can we try again when we’re not so different? Can we make amends? Why can’t we just. Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy? Weigh down on me, stay 'til morning. Way down, would you say I'm worthy?”

Once the guitar was set on the bed next to him, I climbed into Noah’s lap, immediately crashing my lips to his. It was a slow and lazy kiss, filled with the fire of our love that we spent years building and restoring after many dark moments. His tongue brushed along my bottom lip, capturing what was left of my peach chapstick, humming in delight. 

Breathless, I rested my forehead against his. “I fucking love you, Noah.” 

The same thumb that brushed away his tears earlier brushed away mine. “I love you too, angel. I promise I’ll become the husband you deserve again. Those demons are still there but your love keeps them at bay.” 

I pulled him down to bed with me, covering us both with the blanket as I held him from behind him. Noah would never admit it but he loved being the big spoon. It had been so long since we slept like this, always finding ourselves sleeping back to back.

“I’ll be here for you, Noah. Heaven knows I ain't getting over you,” a soft kiss to his sweater glad back. 

He linked our fingers together, bringing them to his lips. “We plan on releasing that version on the soundtrack but I wanted you to be the first one to hear it.” 

“Thank you,” I breathed in his scent. 

We found ourselves in a comfortable silence and let the tears we shed together dry against our skin. Neither of us were perfect but those demons would no longer cage Noah inside his mind. I’d walk through the flames of hell to protect him from them. Just as slumber sunk its claws into me, ready to drag me under, Noah’s soft voice roused me from sleep. 

“I dream in Hell and wake up screaming. Wishing that I was someone else. The static leaves me in a catatonic peace. I wanna finally sleep now.”

Swallowing the large lump in my throat, I raked my nails along the skin of his stomach underneath his sweater. 

“Sleep now, my love. I’m right here.”

#tina talks #thefallennightmare #noah sebastian #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian and reader #noah sebastian one shot #noah sebastian fanfiction #bad omens #bad omens cult #bad omens fanficiton

[faerytreealtars]

How To Reach Your Destined Role? ~ Advice & Guidance on your journey through life.

Hi everyone, I'm finally back with another Pick a card! This time I am doing the PAC that the majority voted for and it is all about who are you destined to be? How can you get to that level? Or perhaps you already are there? Pick an image which draws you in and that shall be your pile!

This PAC took a lot longer to get around to than I would have hoped, but I had to put myself first as I'm sure you will understand between battling mental health struggles and then physical ailments, which have still not cleared up but hopefully I will get there soon! Still, I feel brighter and more energized mentally so I thought it was about time to get back on the horse, so to speak anyway without further rambling shall we get into the piles...

[ Image credit goes to ilikefairies ]

Pile One ~

[ Cards drawn: The Magician, The lovers, three of swords & the sun.]

[ Top Of Deck - Nine of cups. ]

Who are you meant to be: You are meant to be a free-spirited soul so do not worry about rushing into choices of who or what you are meant to be. Before I had even pulled any cards I heard the message in my head that you have lots of opportunities in this life and you can choose to be many different versions of yourself, many people get stuck into the mindset that there is only one version of themselves that can exist in this world but that is untrue, it is up to you who you want to be, exist in a way that brings you happiness. Now based on the image you chose and the messages the cards are sharing with me, I feel you are someone who is meant to bring more love, light and hope into this world by merely existing you do this but if you wish to be more proactive then read the next part and hopefully the messages will resonate for you.

How to get there: You need to become more aware of your power in this world, and how your actions and emotions can influence your days. How your thought patterns can affect your choices and beliefs. They either will push you onwards towards happiness and success or hold you back in stagnation and fear but when you work on finding your footing, grounding more in the present moment and working on having more confidence in yourself. seeing yourself as worthy and lovable on the bad days as well as the good then you come closer to the higher power that connects you with your soul. With the three of swords present you have gone through much despair and heartbreak, it has toughened you to this world which can indeed be cruel and though those experiences however sorrowful they were gave you much more perspective and wisdom on human nature and your own inner world they were not meant as punishment or as a way to put out your light. With the sun following this card I can tell that it is your loving energy and the fact you feel so deeply that can power you on to create brighter days not just for yourself but for others too, do not fear sharing your experiences or using them in your creations or hobbies to add inspiration to others life. All in all, I can see you living a good life, not without its challenges but a life like that is unlikely and perhaps boring! The final advice I hear is to keep working on yourself, masterpieces cannot be rushed and you should focus on what intrigues and brings you happiness in the moment, don't worry about having it all figured out too soon. Best of luck, my dear pile one!

Pile Two ~

[Cards drawn: Page of cups, Knight of cups, the Star & eight of swords]

[Top of the Deck: Ten of Cups]

Who are you meant to be: Okay, woah Pile two your energy is so happy and bright I love it thank you for letting me bask in it for a while!! If no one ever tells you that you are wonderful and lovable then let me please be the one to tell you now: You are wonderful and lovable in so many ways, thank you for existing!! Anyway on with your reading. So we have a lot of water energy going on here so right off the bat I can tell you are meant to be someone who values and uplifts your own as well as others' emotions. I keep hearing therapist in my mind and though I never intended this reading to be about careers perhaps that is a job you feel drawn to or perhaps you already seem to act like everyone's personal therapist in your day-to-day life. (I know that can get tiring so do put your own wants, needs and boundaries first if you feel that others are putting too much upon you.) I am now also hearing teacher and parent so yeah it may be in your destiny to help shape and mould the next generation into as bright and uplifting a soul as you are yourself. Now in a more general sense, I can see you are meant to be someone who always strives first to open others' eyes to truths in the world that others may want to turn a blind eye to, sometimes this may make you feel alienated and insecure of yourself but keep striving on and never back down for those who wish to put your down like to see you trapped in your insecurity and doubt it allows them to get away with all the malice they put into the world but you are far bolder and brighter than them and your presence, voice and actions help to bring forward a more hopeful future.

How to get there: Honestly Pile two I feel you are already on your way to getting there without much guidance from anyone else but I will say keep listening and feeling your emotions, honouring them as truth for it is how your intuition seems to let itself be heard. Keep working on your communication skills for I feel they are a skill you will be using quite a lot in the future or perhaps you already do. Finally don't be afraid of having a bad day, you are allowed to feel negative about things and it's totally okay to lean on others as much as they lean on you. Don't get so caught up in overthinking and doubts, or even worries about how to help others sometimes we have to let others make it through their own lessons in life, it is like the baby turtles who hatch on the beach and must make it to the sea on their own power and will, not all of them will make it but we can't intervene less we can cause more harm than good. That's all I'm getting for you pile two. I wish you the best and again I just love your energy so keep being you because it brings so much happiness to the world.

Pile Three ~

[ Cards drawn: The magician, The high priestess, seven of pentacles, four of cups ]

[ Top of the deck: The Tower ]

Who are you meant to be: You are meant to be someone who changes, themselves and the world. You are like a phoenix who rises from the ashes and is rebirthed as a newer, better you after every fall. I am also getting the visual of a chameleon who changes to fit their environment. This at times may have left to feeling confused or a sense of imposter syndrome but do not fear it is a skill and talent all in itself and it is not a wrong thing to be doing. It allows others to feel more comfortable around you so then in turn you can aid them in bettering themselves. Now to focus more on you, who this reading is meant to be helping I can see you are meant to a more spiritually in tune individual who listens and honours their mystical power, of which you have a lot. I feel many of you have been shamed or forced into behaving "sensibly" when you try to show this part of yourself as many cannot understand it and feel it doesn't help with the real world. Please stop listening to them, you would not have this connection to your higher self and the divine if it was not meant to benefit you and the world in some way. So feel free to behave as "woo-hoo" as you wish, the ones who value and respect you will stick around and those who behave in ways that try to condition and control you will eventually leave and you will be all the better for it!

How to get there: Work on listening to your intuition more, remember that intuition is a message that carries calm energy while anxiety will make you feel frantic and in the need to rush. You do not need to rush. As the seven pentacles show you need to cultivate patience and wait for the seed to grow. Trust that all that you are doing, even if at times it is having to sit and do nothing is helping to nurture and give your dreams and goals the best chance of success. I also feel you need to take more time to give yourself mental rest, let your mind grow still and quiet, focus on one thing at a time and seek more time for meditation. This in turn may help you feel more grounded and grateful for all you already have and all you have already achieved. Finally do not fear the tower falling, in the midst of the chaos it may feel like the end but you will begin to see it is simply the clearing of the unneeded and stagnated to allow for the creation of the brighter and better. From it you will always become wiser, stronger and yes even kinder.

I wish the best to all of you in pile three, I know the days may seem long and hard but try to focus on the simple gratitudes and you will begin to see the sun beam from behind the clouds. Until next time, Love Fae.

#divination #cartomancy #tarot #tarotblr #channeling #♡ messages channelled from the divine ♡ #pick a card #pac #free tarot reading #tarot readers #tarot cards #tarotcommunity #tarot witch #pick a reading #pick a card reading #pick a card tarot #how to reach your destined role pac #destiny tarot

[chosonore]

summary: your relationship with aventurine and veritas was easy, a haven of comfort and care - it was one that started gradually but quickly became an integral part in your life. despite your anxities and worries about what people would think about being in a relationship with both of them, you couldn't imagine a life without them

a/n: i haven't written anything in two years :') this is just 1.4k non-coherent word vomit from 3am - i was listening to emei's don't know about the world and it just created this fluffy image in my brain that i needed to get out. i didn't bother proofreading this lol also please don't expect any more or consistent writing, idk how to write anymore

“hey baby, how was work?” aventurine wrapped his arms around you, leaning down to kiss you gently. you inhaled his familiar scent, instantly feeling like you were at home. he swayed back and forth with you for a bit before letting you go, opening the car door for you. “i missed you.”

“i was only gone for a couple of hours.”

“i still missed you.” he gave you a grin before starting the car, driving off to your usual groceries store. it was a routine that you’d gotten used to, one that so effortlessly made you feel safe and loved. aventurine would pick you up from work, you’d get anything you needed from the store before heading home to veritas and your three critters. you’d have dinner together, talk about your day and have a cozy night. 

when you thought about it, you still didn’t quite understand how your relationship came to be. the three of you met at uni and quickly formed an inseparable, unlikely trio. though aventurine and veritas had always been very close despite their frequent bickering, you felt like you just kind of stumbled into this. you felt confusing at first, after all, you harboured feelings for both of them. one kiss had led to another, led to dates and more. it was a relief to know that they felt the same. neither of you had really talked about it as it just gradually grew into what it was now. 

it started with you staying at aventurine’s large penthouse apartment more and more frequently until he finally asked you to move in. then one day, as you were building furniture for your shared bedroom, veritas brought home the three critters. seemingly he had felt pity upon encountering them and couldn’t separate them whatsoever, so he just took them all home. and there it was, your little family. 

you knew you loved them as they did you. but recently, you’d noticed the stares of strangers and in particular your co-workers more. heard some whisperings about your unconventional relationship and it bugged you, even if you tried not to pay attention to it. it was slowly nagging on your soul and heart, making you question the relationship. was it really that odd? or frowned upon? could you really stay in this relationship, grow old and happy together?

“i booked a spa weekend for us at the end of the month!” aventurine’s rambling interrupted your trail of thoughts. he seemed excited as he always was whenever he could spoil you and veritas. “it was about time, both of you have been way too busy. i miss having my two loves all to myself.”

you snorted, taking his hand in yours. the way he incessantly spoiled you had made you uncomfortable at first until you realized that it was one of the ways he liked to express his love. he was happy being able to provide his loved ones with anything they could ask for, so that they would never have to worry about anything ever again. you lifted his hand to press a kiss against it. “i look forward to it.”

as you entered the apartment with aventurine, you were greeted by a rather calm and comfortable atmosphere. soft music was playing and when you rounded the corner, you could see veritas sitting on his armchair with his legs propped on the ottoman. the critters were sitting around him, staring at the book in his hands as if they could read as well. it was an adorable sight, the way their heads moved along with veritas’ hand movements whenever he flipped a page, the way he pet them every now and then. you wished you could secretly snap a photo without him noticing but he always did. then he would scowl and disappear from the frame, grumbling about hating having his photos taken. you never told him that you liked the way his cheeks slightly reddened whenever you did this.

“we’re back,” you called out, placing the bags on the counter before opening your arms and catching a critter that was hopping over to you. it made happy noises as you pet it gently. aventurine put the groceries away, turning slightly to peck veritas’ cheek as he padded over to you. “thought we could make some casserole.”

“we? you mean i cook and you watch,” veritas raised his eyebrows at aventurine. 

he pouted, feigning outrage. “babe, i would never dare to! besides, i know you don’t mind.” he wrapped his arms around veritas, waddling around with him as he watched him cook. veritas would never admit to it but you could tell that he enjoyed himself by the way he leaned to the side to peck aventurine’s lips or absentmindedly held his hands whenever he was monitoring the food. you prepared the critters’ food, smiling as they crowded around you and mewled hungrily. veritas would lean over to spoon feed you every now and then, asking for your opinion on the meal before he finished preparing it. 

after dinner, you spent your evening cuddled between veritas and aventurine as you watched your tv shows together before heading to bed.

aventurine was still showering when you crawled into bed with veritas, yawning tiredly. he propped himself up on his elbow, regarding you with an inquisitive look. “what’s wrong?” he asked pointedly, the kind of tone he used when he meant business and didn’t want any kind of dodging. you knew you couldn’t lie to him, he would see right through you. your first instinct was to say “nothing” but from the corner of your eyes, you could see him raising his eyebrows.

“i’ve just been noticing the looks we get when we’re out together. people stare or give judgemental looks, you know?” you started to explain, fidgeting anxiously. just thinking about this issue made your stomach churn. “then i heard some of my co-workers talk about us, saying judgemental things… some of it was kind of hurtful too.”

you glanced at him, suddenly feeling ashamed that you were even questioning anything. you knew that veritas and aventurine sincerely loved you and cared about you. “honestly, it made me question our relationship. if we can really grow old together like this or if it’s doomed to fail. whether it’s right for me to be with you.”

veritas looked at you as if you just said something unfathomably stupid. “there’s no reason to question what other people are saying. it’s your life to live, is it not?” he retorts and you can tell there’s a sigh in him that wants to escape. “are you happy? with this?” he gestures vaguely between you two and aventurine who just came out of the bathroom and joined you two in bed. “with us?”

“yes? of course i am,” you replied. aventurine glanced between you, trying to figure out what the conversation was about as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer to him.

“then don’t question it. your happiness is all that matters. why pay any mind to fools that have nothing better to do than talk about you behind your back?” veritas pulled the covers up and gave everyone a quick kiss before reaching out to turn off the lights. his words made you feel more at ease, slowly melting any doubts and anxieties you had been feeling the past few weeks. 

“who hurt you? do i have to make someone disappear?” aventurine asked yawning, placing his head on veritas’ chest. “i love you, always have, always will. what goes on in our relationship is none of their business. i think we’re a good team, aren’t we?”

you knew home was with them - they made you feel safe, loved and comfortable. you couldn’t imagine coming home to only one of them, it wouldn’t feel complete. you liked coming home to aventurine showing you little souvenirs he had brought from his business trips, seeing him play with the critters and the way his eyes lit up with a competitive gleam whenever you tried out new video games together. you liked when veritas sat with you and explained whatever new findings or research he was working on, his well contained enjoyment of being able to share it with you. the way he wrapped his arms around you and placed his chin on your head when he opened up to you and was vulnerable, as best as he could. you knew he didn’t like to be but was willing to in his own way. and you were grateful, for both of them.

when you watched veritas and aventurine bicker about who was hogging the blanket again, leaving the other cold, you knew you wouldn’t change a thing about this relationship for anything in the world. you loved them, with all your heart. there was nothing else you needed from this world - you were happy.

#tbh the biggest struggle in writing this was me sitting for a bit and thinking #do i use aventurine or kakavasha #i still haven't come to a conclusion #a lot of this was settling in my brain bc i kept seeing ship art of them being domestic with the critters haha #if you know me i just love anything fluffy and domestic #makes me feel cozy and warm #i love aventurine so much lol he might just singlehandedly make me wanna write again alongside jing yuan #being a hi3 player i also have a lot of feeligns towards the other characters im gonna scream #how tf do people tag anymore i feel like a boomer LOL i've been on here since 2013 and being away for two years suddenly everything is new #i'm just gonna tag it how i tagged my other pieces lol #hsr #honkai star rail #star rail #aventurine #hsr aventurine #aventurine x reader #dr ratio #veritas ratio #hsr dr ratio #dr ratio x reader #hsr x reader #hsr x you #writing #hsr imagines #honkai star rail imagines

[cuppajj]

Beast Ancients AU FAQ

I’ve seen a lot of asks in my inbox that are identical to each other, so I decided to put em all in one post and then some. This’ll be updated the more I develop the AU and the more info we get.

As a disclaimer, I am very new to CRK (as of December 2023) and I haven’t gotten to all the game or story modes yet (notably odyssey), so things are definitely bound to change + be elaborated on more! Anyway without further ado:

General

What are the Beast Ancients’ themes?

Vanilla is Penance, Lily is Sovereignty, Dragonberry is Pride, Cacao is Solitude, and Cheese is Conquest. I tried to keep them within the realm of their original meanings

Essentially my philosophy is: Penance is the acknowledgment (truth) that sins such as deceit exist in the world and must be cleansed. Sovereignty is an extreme form of freedom where one can have all the agency they wish, but can be just as silent about their presence/power as well. Pride is a byproduct of passion or sloth, boiling down to the adamancy of the subject. Solitude is a choice made with both resolution and apathy in various degrees, and lastly Conquest promises an abundant future at the cost of untold destruction.

If the ancients are bad, are the beasts good?

No, the old Beasts are still a threat. With a total of ten beasts to worry about, the situation on Earthbread is very dire. However, there is still hope left, and hope can go a long way.

Is there a new set of ancient heroes with soul jams?

No, and there likely won’t be. The Neo Beasts and first Beasts still have their respective soul jam halves, and both want each other’s.

Where’s Gingerbrave and his party?

Likely the Crème Republic, which becomes a refuge for many cookies after the rise of the neo beasts. They’re at the front of the resistance movement, working with Clotted Cream Cookie to plan how the beasts will be taken down.

What do the Neo Beasts think of their past selves?

Generally they see themselves as improved or improving. The only one who doesn’t feel that way is Frigid Cacao, who doesn’t reflect on himself that often.

Did they all corrupt at the same time?

Still working on that part. The timeline for beast ancients is a WIP, but for now, it’s likely that while they didn’t corrupt at once, they corrupted pretty close to one another. Cheese was likely first, followed by Lily. Vanilla was among the last to fall and evidently had it the worst.

Do the Neo Beasts still have kingdoms? How is life like there?

Answered here

What are the cookies of darkness doing?

As of writing (5/31/24) we don’t have a lot of info on the cookies of darkness in beast yeast, but at the very least I can say Dark Enchantress cookie may or may not know about Midnight Lily’s plan to destroy her.

How would legendaries react?

I admittedly don’t know everything about the legendaries to say yet, but they’re all alarmed to some degree. I can flesh them out the more I learn about them

Individual Neo Beast questions under cut!

Saint Vanilla Cookie

How do his powers work?

Answered here

Does he know he’s killing cookies?

Nope, he doesn’t see it as that and it would pain him to. He sees purification as a form of transition or ascension in itself, to put it simply; he might even envy those he turns to stardust, knowing his own tainted soul will be so much harder to liberate.

Why is he constantly crying?

He’s just like that. He’s just that big of an empath.

Has his relationship with Lily changed?

Saint Vanilla still cares very much about Lily, and may even be more open about his feelings towards her; but he admits the only reason why she’s still alive is because she convinced him to leave her for last. Lily very well knows that Vanilla, in his delusion, wants to purify her more than anyone else. Vanilla often pities her choice to stew in her tainted soul, but he respects her decision… at least the alternative is that they’ll someday be the only two cookies on Earthbread.

What happened to Black Raisin?

As the very first to witness his rise, she inadvertently became his very first martyr.

Where’s Custard Cookie III?

With his relatives in the Crème Republic, alongside the rest of Gingerbrave’s party. The kid has a hard time wrapping his head around what happened to Pure Vanilla, and it may be a blessing that he’s been largely focused on worrying about the well being of his uncle, Clotted Cream Cookie. As the head of the resistance, he’s been working tirelessly… is this what a king goes through too?

Shadow Milk’s opinion on Saint?

To put it simply, he starts out thinking that a delusional Vanilla will be easy to manipulate, but he soon finds out that Saint Vanilla is way smarter and more aware than made out to be. He knows Shadow Milk is with him, and he wants to purge him from his soul; but that is a process that may be harder than anything else. So in the meantime, Shadow Milk can watch as he continues on his path of Penance towards ascension, fighting back the resistance he creates before it can truly harm him. Essentially, Saint Vanilla isn’t trapped with Shadow Milk, Shadow Milk is trapped with Saint Vanilla.

Dragonberry Cookie

Is the skull on her head real?

Yes! It comes from a nondescript monster.

If Pitaya is imprisoned, where is Snapdragon?

With Tarte Tatin and/or Royal Margarine. Dragon City likely got taken over by Dragonberry’s kingdom, but they noped out of there as it happened. The two of them might’ve been the first few to recognize Hollyberry’s spiral into corruption and where it was headed

How is her family doing?

Alright for the most part, but they can feel Dragonberry’s influence in every aspect of their life now. While Royal and Jungleberry are technically still the king and queen, it’s only a figurehead role as Dragonberry is the true ruler. She still cares about her family very much, but she’s controlling and good at keeping them under her thumb. Dragonberry’s granddaughter Princess Cookie is the only one who objects this new way of life, and runs away from the palace.

How would the other dragons react?

The other dragons aren’t canon to CRK so they’re not canon to the au by extension, but just for this question, they’d be different levels of alarmed or concerned save for maybe Longan. I could see Ananas wanting a word with Dragonberry in particular esp since they’re both prideful cookies

Frigid Cacao Cookie

Does he ever go outside?

Very rarely, but it’s usually to observe the licorice sea or meet with the few denizens he has left.

Where is Dark Choco?

Still working on this part (waiting for Apathy pt 2 to come out so I have a better idea), but he’s likely alone by himself. He heard wind of his father’s corruption though and took it less well than he thought he would. Perhaps he’ll run into someone who feels the same?

Is his permafrost truly permanent or can the frozen citizens be thawed?

Technically yes, the permafrost can be thawed, but it’s a meticulous process since Cacao’s ice isn’t normal ice. It’s a cure that Crunchy Chip is looking for to save Caramel Arrow.

How does the licorice sea work for him and how did he come to tame it?

I can’t say how yet outside of the fact that it was a definitely cool and heroic thing for Dark Cacao to do, on the scale of taming the Black and White dragons. The sea, arguably a sentient monster in itself, and all of the creatures within it came to follow Cacao and Cacao only. Now it almost acts like an extension of himself: the beast can make the sea do whatever he wants, like acting as his shield, arms, or barrier, and the licorice horrors will vehemently defend him. There are tons of monsters roaming his frozen kingdom now.

Mystic Flour’s opinion on Cacao?

Working on it, but to some degree she knows Cacao is much stronger than he looks. She might see his apparent apathy for his frozen kingdom with fondness though.

Celestial Cheese Cookie

Is the Golden City still running or did she leave it to die?

It may still be running but in a scaled-down beta form. Cheese learned to accept the fact that what she’d built was entirely fake, but she didn’t move on from regaining what was lost. Her virtual Golden City serves as a blueprint for the kingdom she wants on Earthbread, and then some; with nothing in the barren desert to grow her kingdom, her brightened eyes turn elsewhere towards civilizations that could be brought into the fold. Such is the beginning of the Beast of Conquest’s terror.

She does sometimes visit her golden city, only sometimes. It doesn’t look the same; it’s not a paradise for her to escape to, but it is a promise of what she will have someday. This time, it will be no mirage, and there will be no one to threaten its destruction ever again.

Midnight Lily Cookie

What is her opinion on dark enchantress cookie?

DE is the source of insecurity for Lily, who regards herself as the weakest among all the beasts. Because she’s half of a complete whole, who was already half of another whole, she is passionate about reuniting her souls. While she is focused on expanding the influence of the faerie kingdom, her true goal is to track down Dark Enchantress Cookie and destroy her; but she knows she will need more help than just herself, and has considered asking for help from other vengeful allies.

Does she still guard the silver tree?

Yes, she still fiercely honors Elder Faerie’s wishes.

Have her relationships with the other neo beasts changed?

Ish, most notably her and Celestial Cheese are a little more on speaking terms; but they’re connecting through their potential partnership as Lily hopes she can help her take down Dark Enchantress. In return, she might help her expand her kingdom and take down Burning Spice.

If more FAQs come up, I will make a part two. Thank you for your interest!

#beast ancients au #pure vanilla cookie #hollyberry cookie #dark cacao cookie #golden cheese cookie #white lily cookie #crk #crk au #cookie run kingdom au

[fragileheartbeats]

⌗ 𝘚𝘜𝘕𝘋𝘈𝘠 𝘏𝘊 ⁝ 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘺𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘦 ( ♱ )

˚꒰♡꒱‧ Hi there! Before you read this, you should know that English is not my first language Hope you enjoy!

I can see Sunday as one of the most delusional yanderes in the game. He's not a sadistic person, but he's someone who doesn't see any problem in hurting you if that's what it takes.

The world is gray in his eyes, devoid of color and warmth. But in his bleak existence, you shine brighter than anyone else. Your smile is a gentle sunrise, your eyes are a soft, comforting dusk. You are his beacon, his solace, the only touch of beauty in a life filled with shadows.

You're different in his eyes. Not truly different, but to him, you are extraordinary. He loves everything about you, from the way your hair cascades over your shoulders to the glistening tears that fall from your eyes. Your presence brings a semblance of color and warmth to his otherwise monochrome existence.

He likes to believe that what he's doing is right. He convinces himself that he’s helping you by keeping you close, away from the harshness of the outside world. He thinks he's protecting you, preserving your purity and beauty forever.

It's okay, he tells himself. It's okay if he broke your legs, if he hurt you. It's okay if you bleed, if you cry, if you hate him. It's all okay.

Because in the end, he's doing it for you. It's all for you. It's all because of you.

Look what you made him do! Look at what he has become! Why are you doing this? Why did you make him fall for you? Why did you smile so beautifully at him? Why did you show him what love means? Why? Just why?

He didn't want to take it this far. He only wanted you to listen, to understand, to believe him, to love him.

But you didn’t. And look what happened. Can't you see it hurts him as well? Can't you see he doesn't want to do this? Why do you force him to do it?

He didn't want to break you, to hurt you, to kill you. He never imagined it would lead to something so painfully tragic.

He remembers the first time he saw you, how his heart skipped a beat, how his breath caught in his throat. You were a vision, an angel in his dark world. He wanted to protect that light, to keep it close to him, to never let it fade away.

But as time went on, his love grew darker, more possessive. He couldn't stand the thought of you being with anyone else, of you smiling at someone else the way you smiled at him. He started to see threats everywhere, dangers that could take you away from him.

He wishes he could do better. Love you better. Keep you better. Please come back! He'll change! He'll do anything you ask. He'll give you anything you want.

What do you want? Just name it! Do you want him to beg on his knees like a dog? He will do that!

He won't break your bones anymore. He won't keep you in your cage anymore. He won't put a collar on you anymore. He won't mock you anymore. He won't hurt you anymore. Just please, please smile at him again. Let him see that light once more.

He is willing to destroy himself for you, to become whatever you need, just to see your happiness. His love, warped and twisted, remains boundless. He is lost without you, a soul adrift in the darkness, clinging to the hope that you might yet forgive him.

Please, don’t leave him in this darkness. Let your light guide him back. Even if you can never love him, even if you can never forgive him, just let him see your smile once more. Let him believe, if only for a moment, that there is still beauty in the world.

Just please, please smile at him again.

Please...

He sits in the dark, watching you cry in your sleep, tears streaming down his own face. He whispers to himself, trying to convince himself that what he's doing is right, that it's for your own good. He strokes your hair gently, his touch soft and tender, in stark contrast to the violence he’s inflicted upon you.

Every tear you shed feels like a dagger to his heart, but he tells himself that it’s necessary. He tells himself that he’s saving you from a world that doesn’t deserve you, from people who can’t appreciate you the way he does.

But deep down, he knows. He knows that he’s the monster you need saving from. He knows that his love is twisted and wrong. And it breaks him.

He clings to the hope that one day, you’ll understand. That one day, you’ll see that everything he did was out of love. That one day, you’ll forgive him.

But until then, he’ll keep you safe in the only way he knows how. Even if it means breaking you. Even if it means breaking himself.

Because in the end, he's doing it for you. It's all for you. It's all because of you.

@ 𝒇𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒔 . 𝐷𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑔𝑖𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑒, 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑡, 𝑜𝑟 𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑠𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑦 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑘𝑠 𝑜𝑛 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑒𝑏𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑠.

#ㅤㅤ⠀ㅤ 𓇼ㅤ ㅤ𓂂ㅤㅤ ˚ㅤㅤ ◌ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ #sunday x reader #yandere sunday x reader #yandere sunday #hsr x reader #yandere honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail #yandere hsr x reader #yandere hsr #yandere honkai star rail #yandere x reader #yandere imagines #hsr headcanons #hsr imagines #hsr sunday #yandere obsession #yandere #yandere x darling #hsr x you #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail x you #hsr #sunday #hsr angst

[gallusrostromegalus]

Does Nobody chat it up with other deities from other sectors? Or are they kind of a hodge-podge of all deities all at once?

No, because Nobody is functionally the Life Machine's uterus and placenta.

The Life Machine itself, however, is very aware of, communicates with, and even has *Romance* with the neighboring Life Machines.

The AEIWAM Life Machine is really something akin to a Sixteen Dimensional Elder God that is also A Barnacle. It's sessile in it's peculiar cross-sections of reality, anchored to Earth in the localities of the greater Hiroshima Prefecture in Japan, The Black forest of Germany, parts of the Chihuahuan Desert in the US and Mexico, and most recently, the entirety of the London Metropolitan Area encircled by the M25 London Orbital Motorway, and curiously, it's Spirit-world equivalent location, Reverse London.

What's odd about Reverse London is that, unlike it's Soul Society, Schwarzwalden and Hueco Mundo, you can't actually get to Reverse London from anywhere in Spirit World.

If any Shinigami wants to visit their colleagues in Wing Bind/the NDMA, they have to go to the living world in a gigai, get on a fucking plane, actually enter Regular London, locate one of the portals, and from THERE they may enter Reverse London, provided all their paperwork is in order. The same is true of any witch that wants to visit soul society- they must first fill out a mountain of paperwork, get on a plane to Japan, physically enter the Hiroshima prefecture and make contact with a Shinigami there to open a portal into soul society.

It makes schlepping across the Dangai or Garganta look like a breeze!

What's going on is that Each Life Machine only impregnates and gives birth once. The other Life Machines covering Earth offer their neighboring Machines choice pieces of themselves, not unlike a male octopus tearing off his Spermatophoe limb for a female. If the proffered piece of reality is acceptable, the recipient Life Machine takes it and embeds it into her own matrix, and uses the sample to create her daughter.

The Current Life Machine is the third in her line. The first was based only in Japan, but then received the Chihuahuan desert from her mate. The second one drew souls associated with both regions, and eventually received the Chihuahuan desert from her mate. She gave birth and passed on about 35,000 years ago. About 2,000 years ago, The Current Life Machine accepted London and Reverse London into her polydimensional body in exchange for Mount Dogo and began building her daughter by creating Nobody to oversee that process.

To put it another way, one God jizzed London into another God <3.

The reason Reverse London isn't accessible via spirit world is that it's not fully integrated into the fetal Life Machine yet. If things had gone according to plan, souls could start to travel between Reverse London and Spirit World in about 2450, but ah. The whole small-g-godslaying thing. So now it's sort of integrating itself at random, which is more than a little dangerous because the Dragons and other ectofauna of Reverse London are nothing like Spirit World has ever seen, and the hollows and Yokai of Spirit world the same to Wing Bind. Strange Things have been appearing in the outer districts of the Rukongai for some time now- Aquatic horses with a taste for flesh, Ominous black hounds and Strange Women in Ponds. In Reverse London, there are reports of Foxes being even Cheekier than usual, going from petty theft to Bank Fraud and Crypto currency trading.

As for the assorted Gods of this and other worlds- No two Life Machines operate with the same internal logic, so while the AEIWAM Life Machine has it's Hollows, Yokai and Kami, other life machines are operating under entirely different rules, so who knows what is running around elsewhere.

#aeiwam #an elephant is warm and mushy #Bleach #Bleach fanfic #Long post under the cut

[thatdammchickennugget]

Edge Of Great

pairing - mattheo riddle x gn!reader

warnings - soft!matty, band au, not proofread, mention of y/n

a/n - basically the "edge of great" scene from jatp because I'm obsessed with it

wordcount - 1.4k

The soft hum of chatter echoed through the dimly lit room of the Room of Requirement, transformed tonight into a makeshift concert hall. Flickering candles hovered above, casting an ethereal glow over the stage. Your heart raced in rhythm with the thumping of Theo’s drums as you strummed the last few notes of the first song, casting a fleeting glance at Mattheo, who was lost in his own world, his fingers dancing effortlessly over the guitar strings.

Usually, performing with him was exhilarating, a spark of energy that made every song feel like magic. But tonight was different. Ever since you’d come to the startling realization that your feelings for him were more than just friendly, being near him sent your nerves into overdrive. On stage, you found yourself gravitating towards Draco and Enzo, avoiding Mattheo’s gaze and touch like the plague.

Mattheo, however, wasn’t oblivious. He noticed how you only leaned into Draco's playful nudges, how you laughed at Enzo’s exaggerated bass solos, but never once did you meet Mattheo’s eyes or respond to his cues. It gnawed at him, a strange pang of jealousy bubbling up each time you interacted with the others and not him.

As the opening chords of the next song filled the room, he decided enough was enough. He wasn’t sure what had changed between the two of you, but he was determined to bridge the gap. His eyes flicked towards you, determination and a hint of frustration etched in his features. You tried to ignore the burning intensity of his gaze, focusing instead on the lyrics pouring from your lips as you danced over to where Blaise was stood at his keyboard.

But Mattheo had other plans. With a few deft movements, he sauntered closer, the rich timbre of his guitar merging seamlessly with your voice. He played with more fervor, each note a call to you, a plea for your attention. During a calmer moment in the song, he stepped beside you, his guitar emitting a soulful riff that blended beautifully with your vocals.

Then, to your surprise, Mattheo dropped to one knee, never missing a beat as he played a mesmerizing riff. He looked up at you with an irresistible smile, his eyes filled with a mix of mischief and genuine emotion. The proximity sent a shiver down your spine, and you couldn't help but glance at him.

The moment your eyes met, the world seemed to narrow down to just the two of you. His gaze was intense, a mix of confusion, longing, and something else you couldn’t quite place. The connection was electric, a silent conversation held in the space between notes and heartbeats. His smile was infectious, making your heart flutter in ways you couldn’t ignore.

You felt the pull, the undeniable chemistry that had always been there but was now charged with your newfound feelings. In that shared moment, the music became a bridge, reconnecting what had been frayed. Mattheo’s fingers moved with purpose, each strum a promise, each riff a declaration.

As the song built to its crescendo, you found yourself moving closer to him, your voice intertwining with his guitar in perfect harmony. The room, the audience, even your bandmates faded into the background, leaving just you and Mattheo, standing on the edge of something great, something profound.

The final notes hung in the air, the echo of your harmonized voices still lingering when the spell finally broke. The soft hum of applause brought you back to reality with a jolt. Your heart was still racing, not from the performance, but from the closeness of Mattheo, the unspoken emotions in his eyes.

Panic surged through you. Without thinking, you took a step back, breaking the connection. Mattheo's smile faltered, confusion flashing across his features as you quickly turned away. The applause grew louder, but it felt distant, like a muffled roar in your ears.

You managed a quick nod towards the audience, mumbling a hurried “thank you” into the microphone before scrambling off the stage. You didn't dare look back, but you could feel Mattheo’s eyes boring into your retreating figure. Your bandmates exchanged puzzled glances, but you couldn’t stop, couldn’t think. All you knew was that you needed to get away, to clear your head.

You slipped through the crowd of students and out the door into the quiet hallway, the cool air a stark contrast to the warmth of the stage. Leaning against the wall, you tried to catch your breath, your mind racing. What had just happened? Why did Mattheo have to make everything so confusing?

Inside the room, Mattheo stood up slowly, the confusion in his eyes turning into a mix of concern and determination. He handed his guitar to Blaise, who gave him a questioning look. “I need to talk to her,” Mattheo muttered, more to himself than to anyone else.

As the applause died down and the rest of the band started packing up, Mattheo slipped off the stage and made his way to the hallway where you had disappeared. He had to understand what was going on, why you were avoiding him, and what that moment on stage had meant. And most importantly, he needed to tell you how he felt, before the fragile magic of the moment slipped away entirely.

You leaned against the cool stone wall, trying to steady your breathing. The confusion and intensity of the moment still coursed through you, making it difficult to think clearly. You heard footsteps approaching and instinctively knew who it was. Before you could prepare yourself, Mattheo rounded the corner, his eyes locking onto yours.

"Hey," he began, his voice softer than you'd expected. "What was that all about?"

You forced a smile, shaking your head as if it was nothing. "Just got a little overwhelmed, I guess. Nothing to worry about."

His brow furrowed, not buying your act for a second. "Overwhelmed? You were avoiding me the whole time on stage. Did I do something?"

You shook your head more vigorously this time, trying to dismiss his worries. "No, Mattheo, you didn't do anything. It's fine. I'm fine."

He stepped closer, his presence both comforting and overwhelming. "No, it's not fine. You won't even look at me. What changed? We used to have this... this connection on stage. Now it feels like you're shutting me out."

Your heart pounded, the walls you’d built around your feelings starting to crumble under his earnest gaze. "It's nothing, really. Just... stressed about the performance."

Mattheo's frustration grew evident. "Stressed? Y/n, I know you. This isn't just stress. Talk to me."

You bit your lip, the words threatening to spill over. "Mattheo, please. Just drop it."

But he wouldn't let it go. "No, I won't. I care about you, and this is killing me. Why won't you let me in?"

The intensity of his words, his eyes, broke through your defenses. "Because I'm scared, okay?" you burst out, your voice cracking. "I'm scared because I realized I have feelings for you and it terrifies me."

The silence that followed your confession was deafening. Mattheo stared at you, stunned, the weight of your words sinking in. "Y/n..."

You shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes. "I didn't want to feel this way. I didn't want to ruin what we have. But seeing you every day, being so close to you on stage, it's been driving me crazy."

Mattheo's expression softened, a flicker of understanding and something deeper in his eyes. "You think you’re alone in this?" he asked gently. "You think I don’t feel the same way?"

Your breath caught in your throat. "What?"

"I've been trying to get your attention all night because I wanted you to see me," he confessed, stepping closer until there was barely any space between you. "I wanted you to see that you're not the only one with these feelings."

The realization hit you like a tidal wave, the confusion and fear starting to dissipate. "Mattheo..."

He reached out, taking your hand in his. "You don't have to be scared. We can figure this out together. We can make this work, on stage and off."

For the first time in what felt like forever, you let yourself smile genuinely, a weight lifting off your shoulders. "Together?"

He nodded, his thumb gently brushing over your knuckles. "Together."

The noise of the students and your bandmates packing up in the room behind you faded into the background as you stood there, hand in hand, on the edge of something new, something incredible. The fears and uncertainties still lingered, but with Mattheo by your side, you felt ready to face them, one step at a time.

Mattheo Taglist - @slytherinboysappreciation @urmomsgirlfriend1 @remussbitch @nighttimewrites @starsval @gillyweeds @sir-elian @harryslittlebitch @thatblackthorn @gayforyelena @whoreforfictionalmen18 @darkacademicvibes @marauderswhxre @ravenclawprincess33 @sbrn0905 @atadoddinnit @helpimhopelesslyinlove @carav4l @Yhiiil @tristanswildcat @niktwazny303 @themarauderswife7 @moonlightreader649 @sherbysherbsworld @Topguncultleader @ihatemyexs @nat1221 @thestarlithideout @bath1lda @pinkposttragedy @allshitsangiggles @mildly-delulu @h3artz4soph @sunasbbie @vcosette @rinalouu @floswife @ariensversion @agent-tempest @s0urw00lf @jolly4holly @starzioo

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#mattheo riddle #mattheo riddle fanfic #mattheo riddle imagine #harry potter #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic #imagine #writing #mari writes #mattheo riddle x reader

[anathemaspeaks]

wildflower

character(s): gojo satoru synopsis: sometimes, not even gojo's infinity can shield him. especially when it comes to you. word count: 0.6k warning(s): none a/n: can you tell i'm obsessed with billie's new album?

gojo satoru existed in a world painted shades of blue.

but to him, you were like a sunflower dancing in the breeze, spreading sunshine wherever you go. you brought in color to his world of navy. your laughter felt like being cascaded in heavenly light, slicing right through his heart and claiming it as your own.

gojo satoru was a man of words.

he would always, always say what was on his mind - and you were no exception. he always made sure to shower you with every ounce of his love, and he had so much to give. but you never needed them, all you had to do was look into his cerulean eyes, and you knew - he didn't have to remind you.

you always know, don't you?

so of course you knew your colors weren't enough to dispel the shadows in his soul. how could they ever be, when someone before you had already claimed that canvas? how could they be, when he felt like his soul died along with the one who claimed it?

the day geto suguru died was the day gojo satoru had met his true demise.

you remember exactly how it played out, the usual playful glint in his eyes reduced to raw, agonizing grief as you held him as he wept, a pain so deep you felt it claw at your own insides. a loss so profound you felt your heart physically shatter.

you remember the deafening, heavy silence of the room you were in, punctuated only by the ragged gasps for air escaping satoru's lips as he crumpled against you, gripping onto your shirt, trembling. you were the only one who truly cared enough about him to help him - who cared enough to view him as human, not an object to use and throw.

a human who just lost his soulmate.

you understood him. he didn't just lose his best friend, he lost the other half of his soul. you didn't need words to know how he felt - the searing rage, the crushing guilt. you just held him in that way for hours, maybe even days.

so as you look into the depths of satoru's sapphire eyes, you see love in them - love for you. but oh, you know he could never love you the way he loved his true soulmate. but years have passed, and he loves you now.

you should put it all behind you, shouldn't you?

but he sees geto in the back of his mind, when it's late and he's looking at you sleeping next to him. he sees geto in the way you look at him, in the crinkle of your eyes when you smile, in the way you tilt your head when you speak to him.

and you knew you shouldn't, but you see it anyways. the way he lingers a beat too long in your embrace, desperately searching for a warmth that isn't yours.

a warmth built on a golden flame of a love that was never yours to have - a love built on ashes. it felt like burning alive, knowing you would never be the true one for him - just the one he ended up with.

did he cross a line, loving you in the shadow of another?

you heard it in his whispered promises. promises laced with a sorrow that spoke of a love story forever unfinished. you felt it in his kisses, tinged with a bittersweet longing you doubt was meant for you. he smothered you with love, but he didn't have to do that to remind you he loved you.

you know he does.

but you were his beautiful wildflower, blooming in the ruins of a garden meant for roses.

#sorry 😭 #i tried #anathema writes #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk x you #gojo jjk #jjk gojo #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #gojou satoru x reader #gojo saturo #jujutsu gojo #gojo x reader #gojo x you #satoru x reader #jjk satoru #satorugojo #jujutsu satoru #gojo #satoru x you

[weasleyreidstyles]

Serendipity

chapter eighteen

summary: it was only meant to be a purely transactional relationship. he would help her strengthen her abilities in return for her getting his friends out of his father's nasty path. he didn't mean to fall for her, but loving her was the easiest thing in his dark world.

no use of y/n, but your general nickname is Meadow. all characters are aged up to be over 18.

pairings: mattheo riddle x fem!ravenclaw reader; platonic!slytherins x fem!reader; platonic!golden trio x fem!reader

warning(s): angst, very little fluff (its there but barely!), canonical death, canonical violence, nightmare trope!, mentions of anxiety and allusion to a panic attack

series masterlist; previous part; next part

"Sirius had a brother-" you whisper, your voice betraying your sadness at the thought of the eccentric man.

"Yes. His name was Regulus Black."

"Regulus Black?" Enzo mumbles to himself, as if he was testing the name on his tongue.

"He was Slytherin's star seeker in the seventies." Blaise said in barely restrained awe. "People said that he was an enigma. Always quiet and observing."

"That is a bona fide assessment of my cousin." Andromeda's low voice sounded from the doorway, the head of her husband visible in the room behind where she stood. "He was always calculating something in that brilliant brain of his."

The smile on her face is as reminiscent as it is stricken with grief. Remus turns to her with the same look simmering in his chocolate irises.

"I don't understand." Pansy says quietly. "My father always said that he was enthusiastic about being a Death Eater. Him and his friends. That Voldemort trusted him implicitly. And you're saying he was spy the whole time?"

"That was the whole point of his undercover work." Remus mused with a grim look. "He was so trusted by Voldemort that he didn't even suspect that Regulus might be the one threatening to unravel all of his intricate work."

"If you knew of the horcruxes during the first war, why isn't it a widely known thing now?" Mattheo's deep rasp travels through you like silky butter, sending a shiver down your spine.

"Because we didn't implicitly know what Regulus was searching for. Not until Dumbledore told us of what he and Harry discovered in light of what happened when you," He looked pointedly in your direction, "reacted the way you did to the dark magic swimming in Miss Bell's veins. Every time Regulus would try, his Mark burned. None of us knew just how detrimental his searching was."

"But he succeeded, didn't he? If he found the one you say was a fake." Enzo asked your old professor, eyes alight with curiosity.

"There's more than one." Mattheo says, surprising you all, except Andromeda, who looks as if this information too wasn't new. "Several actually. There was my father's old diary, the ring, this locket-"

He pauses, head swimming with thoughts of the many possibilities.

"Nagini was always whispering about it in the years she'd turn up at Theo's home to torment me. But she always spoke in riddles. There could be more, there probably is more but I don't know what they could be. Something significant to my father, though."

"But how do they work?" Pansy asks, looking between Mattheo and the adults.

"He murdered innocent people to split his soul." Mattheo says resentfully. And though his face is expressionless, you read his shame as if it was there, clear as day.

"So that's how he survived? He severed his soul and tethered himself to the Earth?" Theo's head was slightly tilted to the side, eyes alight with curiosity.

The thought alone sends a wave of colossal dread through you all.

"We believe so, yes. But knowing just how many there are will be crucial if we are to win this war." Andromeda said quietly, before her husband entered the room with a bright smile, despite the stale tension that permeated the air of the tiny kitchen.

"Ready to go, love?" He questions his wife, voice laden with a love that hadn't faded in the years that you'd known the couple through your parents.

"Yes, dear." She mumbles, her hard exterior crumbling from her face for only a split second before the mask has slipped back into place. Ted kisses his wife on the cheek before gently moving her out of the way of the door frame where he comes to being you into a brief hug. One that you fall into without hesitation.

"Will you be alright out here on your own?" He asks you quietly and you nod your head, which is nestled on his shoulder.

"I'll be fine, Ted. Don't worry about me." Please be safe! Your mind is screaming the notion into existence.

Ted is in far more danger than you will ever be; not only was he a muggleborn, but Andromeda had a long list of estranged family members who would not bat an eyelid if Ted Tonks suddenly disappeared. In fact, they'd probably rejoice over his death, before making a martyr out of Andromeda.

He smiles at you in understanding, as if he knows what you don't voice out loud, before he turns you around so that you're both looking out of one of the kitchen windows.

"Just down that hill, about two miles away is a quaint little village. There's a café that is also a bookshop. I think you'd like it there if it ever gets too crowded here."

"Thank you." You say with a grin and he gives you a friendly squeeze before he makes his way back to his wife, who smiles softly at the two of you.

"I'll visit in a few weeks, to see if everything is still standing." Andromeda says, the ghost of a smirk lining her face as she looks between you and your usually raucous friends. Blaise and Enzo share conspiratorial looks, mischief gleaming in their eyes.

"I'll come back in a week with your first assignment. Give you all a chance to settle in." Remus says, nodding at the three newly anointed Order spies, which sobers the mischief, before he too bids farewell.

With a loud crack, they're gone.

~∞~

The following weeks were certainly odd, to say the least. It was almost like the six of you were on a neverending holiday on some days, spending your days roaming the little muggle village, but then on other days, reality would come crashing down, reminding all of you what was at stake.

It was usually Remus who delivered their assignments; it was always Remus who came once you sent your patronus to Headquarters alerting them of the boys' safe return.

About a month in, he'd arrived with Kingsley Shacklebolt, who had eyed you all with barely restrained mistrust as Remus delivered the brief: find out where Charity Burbage was being held captive and do it quickly and carefully. Luckily there was a meeting scheduled for the end of that week that the boys were expected to attend.

They had left within minutes of briefing them and with a crack, Mattheo, Theo and Enzo had left for Malfoy Manor, leaving you, Blaise and Pansy to occupy yourselves in the meantime.

Hours later, after trying to stomach a lacklustre dinner amidst your shared anxieties, the three of you are huddled together in the living room, chatting quietly about the books you were reading, when the mistakable crack of apparition sounded in the silence of night, then three loud knocks branded the front door.

Blaise took it upon himself to see who it was, and upon seeing their sullen faces, let the three boys in.

Immediately you can tell that something bad has happened.

Enzo doesn't bother greeting the three of you like he normally does as he storms off upstairs to his room; Theo heads straight for the garden door, a pack of cigarettes already in his possession and Mattheo looks positively murderous.

Blaise and Pansy seem to come to an understanding and they go in opposite directions, towards where Theo and Enzo disappeared to, leaving you and Mattheo alone. He doesn't even look like he's present in the moment and your heart aches for him.

"Théo?" You ask, voice barely louder than a whisper. But it knocks him from his stupor as he takes hold of your hand in his, soft against his angry callouses. "Lets go upstairs."

He agrees gruffly, voice low and rough, eyes shining with the onslaught on unshed tears.

Slowly the two of you make your way to the bedroom you share, silence engulfing the two of you, leaving only the sound of your breathing to fill the space. When you enter the room, Mattheo practically collapses onto the bed, body spent from the sheer exhaustion of the evening.

"What happened?" You ask softly, sitting against the headboard and guiding his head into your lap. Mattheo keens into you as you run gentle hands through his unruly hair.

The tears flow shortly after you start and your heart breaks for him.

"She's dead." He says, his voice raspy, catching in his throat. "Professor Burbage is dead."

Your breath hitches in your throat as your eyes fill with tears. Professor Burbage was sunshine personified. She always had a smile on her face despite what the Purebloods said about her affliction to muggle culture. She was beloved by all the muggleborns and the staff; was one of Dumbledore's favourites. And she was a valued member of The Orderof the Pheonix, as an emissary to the muggle authorities. She was a valuable member. Now she was gone.

"H-how did she die?" You whisper hesitantly, for you don't know if the closure of knowing would be worth it.

"My father-" Mattheo shuddered. "He set Nagini on her. He didn't even give her the mercy of a quick death."

Whenever his eyes blink shut, he can see the terror behind the teary eyes of the Professor as she stared between the four boys and Severus Snape while Nagini slithered towards her suspended body. He sees the way her eyes fill with dread as no one comes to her aid. Can see the moment of acceptance as her cries suddenly dull to a staggering silence.

He fears that he won't ever sleep peacefully again. The only saving grace is that you'll never have to witness something like it, if he has his way.

"Gods." You say in disbelief, and you hold onto Mattheo a little tighter at the thought. "We need to tell Remus."

"Not yet." He says and he abruptly sits up from his place.

"Why not? He asked you to find out what happened to her. He needs to know." You argue, but you can already see his stubbornness take effect.

"I said not yet." He retorts with anger painting his features. Your brows furrow in offence. He hadn't spoken to you in such a manner in months.

But you can see how his entire resolve has continued to crumble from the moment he stepped over the threshold. Sp instead of arguing back like you want to, for the sake of getting the information to Remus, you agree and wordlessly huide his head to rest in your lap once again.

"Okay. But as soon as we wake in the morning, I'm going to tell him."

Mattheo mumbles his response into the fabric of your leggings, eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of your fingers brushing through his hair, lightly scratching at his scalp.

He falls into a light sleep and you're content to fall asleep sat up with him, as long as he was peaceful.

~∞~

He's back there again.

In the seat at the right hand side of his father. When the three of them had arrived at Malfoy Manor for the meeting, Mattheo could feel an unmistakable shift in the air.

The way his father's face twisted into a sinister smirk made his insides curl in dreaded anticipation.

"My loyal followers!" He says, arms outstretched as he addressed the sea of Death Eaters who were watching their master in rapt attention. "I have a special treat for you all tonight."

The feeling of dread made Mattheo's stomach drop even further. He didn't need to look to see that Theo, Enzo and Draco felt the same sense of foreboding.

Voldemort wanders around the table, stopping behind where Lucius was sat, before he snatches the wizard's wand from the table with a deadly snicker of a laugh. Draco does not look at his father's humiliated expression.

"I have brought you all a little...gift of sorts."

With a flourish of Lucius' wand, and to Mattheo's utter horror, Charity Burbage appears in front of their very eyes, arms and legs bound together with a brutal looking rope and mouth magically gagged shut.

He feels sick.

He barely hears as his father mocks her, telling the Death Eaters that she was encouraging young wizards and witches to mate with Muggles, thus polluting the Wizarding World with more Halfbloods and Muggleborns all while she cannot defend herself or ask those she recognises for help.

All Mattheo can comprend is that Nagini has found her way towards her dangling prey and Charity's magically bound gag has been removed.

"Severus.." her pleading eyes fall on her old old. "Please! Help me!"

Snape's eyes have not moved from a spot on the wall behind her flailing body. They don't move from that spot as Nagini prepares to strike.

Mattheo grips the arm rests of his seat as he stares blankly ahead, the sounds of his Professor's shrieks and painful screams as her flesh is torn apart is all his can hear.

And then her screams turn into a familiar tone; instead of his Professor, it's you who is suspended above the snake. Your horrifying screams permeate every corner of his skull until its all he can hear.

You're begging him to help you, but he cannot move. His limbs are glued to his seat as his father laughs manically at your expense.

His mind won't even grant him to ability to block it out. Your screams are all he can hear until his father finally utters the killing blow.

"Avada Kedavra!"

Your body drops to a heap on the floor. And then, Nagini feasts.

Mattheo wakes with a start, only to be met by your wary face staring down at him. Gods he feels like he can't breathe.

"I know. I know." He hears your reassurance as clear as day, but he can't breathe.

You place one of his clammy feeling hands against your chest, where your heart beats calmly despite the gravity of the situation. He feels the way you exaggerate your breathing, hoping he can follow.

He does so and eventually he calms down enough to wipe the sweat from his hands and his forehead.

"You're okay. Your safe." You're still holding his hand to your chest, thumb stroking over the small scars that litter his knuckles.

"It was you." He mumbles breathlessly, tears falling from his onyx eyes. "You were in her place and I did nothing to save you. I couldn't save you."

Your heart breaks for him.

"Oh love." You whisper, pulling his body into your's and wrapping him into a tight hug. "I'm here and I'm safe. I'm not going anywhere."

"It felt so real." He says into the skin of your neck, his hot breath fanning iver your sensitive skin.

"It wasn't real, Mattheo." You reaffirm, moving so that your hands cradled both sides of his face, your eyes meeting his. "It was only a dream. I'm not going anywhere."

"You promise?" He hated that he sounded so weak...so vulnerable. But he could always be himself around you, could always count on you to make him feel anything but empty and numb.

"I promise you, Mattheo Riddle." you say, your lips tilting up with a slight smile that he mirrors. You press a light kiss to his chapped lips which he reciprocates in earnest.

Your souls ignite as one and it feels as if a weight has simultaneously been placed and lifted on your shoulders all at once.

Remus would be alerted in the next few hours, but for now, Mattheo let you guide him to a lying position where he layed safely in your arms.

He did not dream of your screams for the rest of the night, but it would haunt him for the rest of his life. That he was certain of.

~∞~

this one is so so so short but i've actually taken so long to get this one written up

also from this point theres just a whole lot of angst (just a little prewarning🫡)

taglist:

(striked out users are ones that i couldn't tag)

@camille-1019 @lovelyygirl8 @xluansstuff @babeylover @thejadeazalea @undercover-smutlover @adhxmoony @dreamingofonceuponatime @thepassionatereader @urmomsgayforme5 @aphroditeisamilf @devotedlycrookeddonut @purplegirls-posts @nofacenonamelikekira @foxboyapologist @lafrone @lovely-maryj @nromanovaswife @leeknows-wife @dracygf @wildlyobserving @ravenclawprincess33 @melllinaa @vellicora @lantsovheiress @emiliahoward @stunkbiggu @vcosette @prongsprincessworld @mattiesgirl @rachmmb @x-kermit-x @sun-fiower-seed @cas-planet @certaindreampost @weirdowithnobeardo @mikalovesicecream @benwadsworthsgf @rainy-darling @faeriepigeons @lovely-blackinnon @hiireadstuff @gimalo135 @elsafromcabinsix @moonlightreader649 @blueshome @nopedefe @spencerreidsthings @navs-bhat @agent-tempest @magimtz23 @y0urm0m12 @sbrn0905 @leona-hawthorne @whatsupb18

#serendipity series #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo riddle angst #mattheo riddle x you #harry potter #mattheo riddle #blaise zabini #pansy parkinson #enzo berkshire #angst no comfort

[crepezinhos]

3sum w/ kazuha and wanderer where kazuha has to constantly scold wanderer for degrading you😭

Fortune’s Fool

(REQUEST #2: Kazuha + Wanderer Smut)

POV: The request ☝️

⚠️ WARNINGS:

— Somnophilia does NOT happen even if it might look like it.

— Reader uses SHE/HER pronouns.

As a wanderer from Fontaine, you’ve made many friends and acquaintances throughout your life. In one of your many trips to Inazuma, you met this very talented wanderer and poet called Kaedehara Kazuha who gave you plenty inspiration and the vibe that you needed in your life. In one of your few trips to Sumeru, you met this other wanderer who called himself Wanderer for some reason and was very complex. He was rude, cold, sometimes mean and very proud of himself, but that didn’t make you unable to develop a friendship with him. After all, in Tevyat, one of the few global-wide traditions is that wanderers don’t attack other wanderers. After all, all wanderers aren’t common and all of them want the same thing, peace and pleasure. So, to make the tradition even better and realer, when there’s an encounter of wanderers, it’s common that they’ll celebrate it and use the opportunity to talk about their recent experiences around the world.

And that’s exactly what you’re doing right now in an isolated bar in Liyue. You had the great luck of spotting the one and only, Kaedehara Kazuha, meditating in a tall, yellow tree, a man popular around Tevyat for being the only human who managed to hold the Musou no Hitotachi alone.

“It was all thanks to my old friend’s vision. Otherwise, I don’t believe I would’ve done it.” He said, taking another sip of his wine.

“Still, that is one great story, Kazuha! It must’ve been a great source of inspiration to your Haikus.” You implied, genuinely impressed at his deed.

“Incredibly, it was not. The only thing I wrote related to that moment was about the fact that the second vision I had with me awakened although its owner has ceased years ago. I don’t want to sound weird but it felt like… his spirit did it. Like it has been watching me ever since my arrival…” Kazuha shared his thoughts, making you take a sip of your wine this time.

“No, no, I totally understand, I also believe that some souls have the strength to live even after the death of their body.” You reassured Kazuha.

But unfortunately, the conversation was cut off due to your attention being dragged by the sound of the bar’s doorbell, signing someone had entered the bar.

The first thing you noticed when you were turning around was the person’s very long hat. Then you realized the person’s short, dark purple hair and the white and blue pattern of their clothes.

It was the nameless Inazuman wanderer you met in Sumeru.

“Hey! Big hat guy!” You called him out, instantly dragging his eyes to you. “Come here!” You said, tapping in the chair right next to you.

He stared at you back for some seconds but didn’t reply, walking to the bar’s counter afterward like you weren’t there.

“Who is he?” Kazuha asked, taking a sip of his wine in a slight suspicion and making you pay attention to him again.

“He’s a wanderer from Inazuma.” You explained.

“Inazuma? That’s weird, he gives me chills even tho I’ve never seen him in my life.” Kazuha said, getting a little more suspicious.

“Yeah, because he lives in Sumeru! Don’t worry, Kazuha, he isn’t dangerous!” You defended Wanderer, turning to him again afterwards. “Hey, c’mon big hat guy!” You screamed but he ignored you again, not even staring at you this time.

“I believe he had a rough day, Y/N, let him go.” He suggested, tapping your resting hand in the table to bring your attention back to him again.

“Well then… where were we?” You asked, finally giving up and fully tuning your body back to Kazuha.

“We were talking about souls and spi—”

BANG!

Your whole body flinched at hearing a sudden bang in the table coming right from your right side, almost making you jump off your seat unlike Kazuha who didn’t get scared at all. You immediately looked to your right and you met Wanderer and a fat wine cup in his hands.

“Why so scared?” He asked, sitting down at the chair you were previously tapping and staring at your scared face with a mocking smirk.

“To be fair, things get extra emotional for people when they’re drinking.” Kazuha answered for you, scolding Wanderer.

After all, even if Kazuha was also drinking, he had the vision of the bar’s entrance, which means that he witnessed Wanderer’s approach and that he could’ve warned you of it.

Your soul finally came back to your body.

“Yeah, that was super unnecessary!” You screamed.

“Don’t worry, it won’t happen again, I don’t want to drink a lot tonight.” He said, taking a sip of his drink.

“Me neither.” Kazuha said, taking a sip of his wine.

“I guess me neither too…” You said, still a little angry at Wanderer.

.

“And then he stared at it for like 10 seconds… hic, and still couldn’t realize Ms. Hina was a parody of himself!” Kazuha finished the story, making you both burst in laugh like hyenas, punching the table with your empty cups and fists.

You two were cackling like that for the unfunniest or most random things you could think of. Your belly was hurting so much from the excessive laughs that you decided to rest your head in the table, trying to curl your body and ease your pain. But then your nose begun to hurt from the friction of it against the table, so you turned your head to your right and noticed Wanderer caressing his forehead aggressively, like he was stressed at something.

“What’s wrong, hic, Hat Guy?” You asked, getting up again just to lay your head in his shoulder.

“I don’t feel so good…” He explained, ignoring your nosy head.

“Are you gonna to throw up?” Kazuha asked, also taking it in funny way like you.

“Maybe, if she keeps moving me around.” He said, trying to push you away from his shoulder without moving too much of his own body.

“Oh, c’mon, don’t be so negative..!” You said, throwing yourself again just to hug his two shoulders very tight.

“H-Hey!” He screamed, trying to get you off him in way more panic than before.

“Hey, Wanderer guy, you said you were a puppet, didn’t you?” Kazuha asked, ignoring the situation you were putting him in.

“Yes, I am!” He screamed again.

“Do you have a dick?” He asked, making you and Kazuha cackle like hyenas again.

“W-What?! Why the heck do you wanna know if I have one or not?!” He asked, absolutely mad at the both of you for laughing at such an intimate question.

“I’m just curious… what about drugs? Can you smoke weed as much as wish to?” He asked again, making you and him just giggle more.

Wanderer didn’t even bother answering and fought you off for some seconds, but out of nowhere, he stopped it all and begun staring at a wall, absolutely paralyzed in realization.

“Y/N, get off.” He demanded.

“I don’t really feel like getting—” You tried joking one more time.

“Y/N, I’m gonna throw up and I will not stop myself if I do it on you. ” He confessed, making you instantly weaken your grip in him.

“Are you o—” You tried asking but as soon as Wanderer felt his shoulders become free, he immediately jumped off his chair and ran towards the hall with the “Bathrooms” sign as fast as light. You decided to follow right afterwards even if you weren’t allowed to go into the man’s bathroom.

“Hey, guys, don’t leave me here!” Kazuha screamed, not getting up from his chair.

When you got inside the bathroom, you stopped to look for where he went and met his two feet standing in the farthest stall of bathroom. As soon as you noticed that, you ran towards his direction again and banged the stall’s door sometimes, trying to get in.

“Wanderer?! Are you ok in there?!” You asked, trying your best to hear him through the door but no sound was emitted rather than him breathing.

“I-I don’t know… I don’t know whether it wants to come out or not…” He answered with a whiny voice.

“I mean… you’re a puppet, I wouldn’t expect my body to react like a human’s if I was a puppet.” Kazuha showed up behind you out of nowhere, which made you jump in fear again and let go of the stall’s door.

“K-Kazuha?! Oh my god, don’t do that again!” You screamed at Kazuha angrily, looking back to meet him acting as calm as ever, unlike the situation.

But in that moment of distraction, the door opened, and there was Wanderer standing very embarrassed.

“I’m fine.” He said, pulling his hat down to cover his face.

“Oh, thank goodness..!” You said very cutely like you hadn’t just screamed at Kazuha and threw yourself at him again.

“H-Hey, don’t throw yourself at me, I’m still a little nauseous!” He complained, trying to push you away but suddenly, you felt Kazuha’s hands lay on your shoulders not so nicely.

“Party in the stall!” Kazuha screamed, pushing the both of you inside the stall, making you and Wanderer barely fall in the toilet if he hadn’t put his hands on the walls.

And meanwhile you and Wanderer got up, you heard a click from the door. As soon as you were finally standing up, you looked behind and noticed that Kazuha had locked the door with a silly smile in his cute face.

.

All that you remembered was Wanderer and Kazuha switching places because he wanted to get out, but both of you pulled him back in. Than you forgot what happened between Kazuha locking the door and the current moment, which made you just more and more confused, because you wanted to know how did you allow yourself to be sandwiched by both of them, making out with you. But it didn’t really matter anymore, they were too good for you to not pay attention in them. Kazuha was behind you now, kissing and sucking your neck as his hands slipped through your shirt and bra, squeezing your breasts gently. And Wanderer was in front of you now, smashing both your heads and lips together with one of his hands squeezing your hair, while his other hands slipped through your underwear and masturbated your clit using two of his cold fingers.

Your brain was barely functioning but you wouldn’t deny that what you were doing with those boys gave you a tremendous amount of pleasure. Two men willing to sacrifice the privacy and art of sex just because they couldn’t wait to fuck you.

Happens that your mouth was the best spot for you to breathe, which was currently being taken by Wanderer’s tongue. He was smirking, loving the power he had over you compared to Kazuha, playing with your clit in ways that made you flinch and screech in agony.

“A-Ah~! Wanderer, wai—!” You screamed when Wanderer suddenly inserted the same two fingers inside you with no kind of warning at all.

But Wanderer ignored you and instantly pulled your mouth back to his. The amount of shock and pleasure from it made your back arch, making it harder and harder for both men to adjust their positions.

“Fucking stand up, I’m not gonna hold you if you fall.” He demanded, stopping the kiss for a quick moment unlike his fingers.

“Hey… let’s be fair to Y/N and us… we’re standing up on a tight place..!” Kazuha scolded with a very gentle voice thanks to amount of alcohol he drunk.

Wanderer leaned up and stepped backwards a few times, letting his hands off you go as started to analyze the situation while licking off his soggy fingers.

“Hummm…” He thought for some seconds while Kazuha still played with your body. “Kazuha, hold her and sit down.” He demanded.

You couldn’t even tell if Kazuha understood how or why but he still obeyed. So he moved both his hands to your shoulders and sat down at the toilet, pulling you down too to sit on top of his lap.

“W-What are you going to do..?” You asked to Wanderer, using some of the energy you managed to regain in that small break.

“Sex!” Kazuha answered for Wanderer very happily, with a cutesy, smiley face.

Yeah, he had no remaining consciousness at all.

But your eyes were more focused on Wanderer slowly undoing his pants with a growing smirk in his face.

“What’s wrong, Y/N? Surprised at seeing a puppet with a dick?” He asked mockingly, stepping the closest he could to you, your mouths centimeters away from each other.

“So you do have a dick…” Kazuha commented.

“Shut up.” He demanded with an angry voice, looking at Kazuha in distraction before looking back at you with that mean smirk. “Come on, I know you want this… you just gotta say it! I know your brain is still working unlike his…” He provoked.

“Hey, I do have a brain..! Here~.” Kazuha defende himself, pulling you closer to him as he used his knees to spread your legs apart.

Wanderer’s grin widened as he admired the awkward position you were in, sitting on top of a man’s lap with your legs spread by his legs… and Wanderer knew that Kazuha would definitely use his hands during it.

“May I, Y/N?” He whispered in your ear very teasingly, making you throw your head aside in embarrassment.

And finally, you nodded weakly, allowing him to finally push all of him inside you. You were about to scream in shock, but Kazuha was quick to identify it and silenced your mouth using one of his hands.

“Shhhh… we don’t want no one to hear us, do we?” Kazuha whispered in your ear and Wanderer finally begun moving in and out of you after also having his moment of pleasure from entering inside you.

Your brain was only functioning to receive the pleasure that Wanderer gave you, even if he was barely starting, and grip on Kazuha’s arm covering your mouth for dear life. Alcohol really messes with the human mind… maybe you shouldn’t have drunk that much alcohol… or maybe you should’ve. Kazuha’s hands immediately begun roaming around your chest as soon as he saw you relax, trying his best to make you feel even more pleasure. He basically just copied what he was previously doing, but better, even if it was only with a single hand, pinching your nipples and touching spots he knew were sensitive and sucking your neck with his mouth passionately.

It was absolute ecstasy.

Wanderer wasn’t going fast yet, he was more focused on finding the perfect spot and angle to thrust you before driving you insane, but that was going to be very complicated in that place. So his hands were absolutely crushing your hips to keep you in that same rough spot at all costs. It was definitely going to mark them if he kept holding you like that for the rest of I.

“Fucking useless slut…” He let out his stress as he realized he wasn’t managing to perfect his thrusts the way he wanted to.

“Hey… let’s not make this even harder for her… she’s doing the best she could for a woman having sex with two men in a bathroom stall.” Kazuha scolded, stopping his massage in your neck for a brief moment.

“Correction, she’s being relentlessly bred like a dog and she loves it.” Wanderer mocked again, staring right at your teary eyes.

“A beautiful one…” Kazuha tried to make it sound like a compliment, kissing your cheek from behind cutely.

“You know that you and your little praises are not making her feel better than I, right? I can feel her pussy clenching when I degraded her~...” He teased, making you throw your head aside in embarrassment of being stared right on the eye by him while he fucked you with hunger.

But Kazuha only saw that as an opportunity to launch his head further in your neck.

“Well… I don’t think she’d show me her neck like this if I was so insignificant.” He mocked Wanderer, who just stared at him very violently.

In that moment of slight relaxation, you used one of your arms to reach Kazuha’s head and caress it to keep him stimulating you, making Wanderer’s ego slightly hurt.

But before you could have a minute of strength and consciousness, you suddenly felt Kazuha’s hand in your boob slkde all the way down to your belly, than your underwear, than your clit, scissoring it according to Wanderer’s thrusts. Or at least trying to…

You felt your entire body flinch and melt in Kazuha’s lap as every single part of your body that could possibly make you feel pleasure was being toyed. You couldn’t tell who was giving you more pleasure and that just made you get more and more lost in it meanwhile they got more and more competitive for dominance. Kazuha was absolutely making you agonize and flinch with his tortuous, little, teasing touches, and Wanderer was absolutely numbing your mind, trying his best to make sure that he was the main one there. He was the reason why Kazuha had to cover your mouth in the first place but you still clearly hear each slap of Wanderer’s skin against your hips and the puffy, soggy sounds coming out of your pussy.

“Fucking Christ… can you fucking take your dick off my way?!” Wanderer screamed at Kazuha, stopping his thrusts inside you for a moment and making Kazuha stop sucking your neck like a meal too.

You had noticed it ever since you sat on his lap but Kazuha was growing harder and harder with every second. His pants and your weight got in the way for most of the process but now you and Wanderer could clearly see and feel his tip beginning to rub and cover your pussy, which was what made Wanderer angry and stop.

“It’s not my fault I’m not the lucky one…” He defended himself with an embarrassed face.

Finally, you had a moment to breathe and process all the information while they discussed.

“I’m not gonna let you finish her off now that I already got inside her.” He assured, putting his hands on your hips again to make sure Kazuha wasn’t going to do anything to you.

“Well then, what will we do?” He asked, making Wanderer instantly create an idea.

You could see his eyelids popping up like the lightbulb on his brain has just been lit.

But Wanderer took advantage of your distraction and pulled you off Kazuha’s lap for a quick moment just to spin you around and push you back to him. The impact of it made your head fall very close to his clothed erection.

“Make the bitch suck you.” Wanderer ordered, gently squeezing your ass in anticipation.

“Hey, she’s not a bitch…” Kazuha scolded with his gentle voice, caressing your head gently.

“Of course she is! She’s such a horny and cock-hungry whore that’s she’s willing to take two at the same time… am I wrong, Y/N?” He mocked, leaning closer to you just to grip on your chin and force eye contact with you.

“I believe we are also sacrificing the sake of privacy and art of sex due to a snowballed lust, aren’t we? We are also pussy-hungry whores with sadistic kinks according to your logic, but I’d rather call this the peak of humanity.” Kazuha scolded artistically.

Even tho it was pretty much a huge turn-off to you and Wanderer…

“Can you just… shut the fuck up and let me fuck her?” He asked, still trying to understand what Kazuha said.

“Alright, whore… I promise it will be quick, Y/N.” Kazuha whispered in your ear, caressing your cheeks with a thumb and forcing eye contact as he undid his pants with his other hand.

And Wanderer finally begun thrusting you. Now that he had full control of your hips with no sort of intervention from Kazuha, he was absolutely destroying your few, remaining dignity.

Completely numbed and hypnotized by the Wanderer’s vicious thrusts, you shoved your warm, breathy mouth inside Kazuha’s cock with his hands’ assistance, sacrificing your best canal to breathe.

“Oh God…” Kazuha groaned, gently laying a hand on top of your head.

He was absolutely relaxed in his seat, letting you suck in your tortuous rhythm. The hand he laid on your head did nothing but caress it. He was so gentle he even praised you even if sometimes you couldn’t even find the strength to keep your head going up and down in his dick.

“You have no idea how good this is…” Kazuha complimented, looking at Wanderer.

“You’re just drunk, she’s barely moving her head… Plus, don’t compare a mouth to a fucking pussy, it’s definitely way better in here.” He mocked between slight hisses.

“No, no… she’s warming my cock passionately and I love it.” He defended you again, hugging your head with better strength to assure you.

“Well then… you’re losing the fun.” He finished, and you suddenly felt a hard slap hit one of your buttocks, making you arch your back and separate your mouth to Kazuha’s cock in shock of it.

Kazuha held your face in place, worried about how you felt, but all you did was moan like crazy to Wanderer’s domination in you.

“See? She loves it! Who would’ve guessed that the Great Swordswoman from Fontaine was a hidden masochist?!” Wanderer mocked, squeezing and caressing the same ass cheek he slapped.

“You should not mock people for a kink you’d rather have than not have in sex… after all, not many women like sadistic guys.” Kazuha scolded again, leaning closer to your head to whisper something in your ear. “Don’t listen to him, Y/N… you’re doing amazing… but I really need you to suck me…” He asked, gently pushing your head back to his cock after you nodded in allowance.

As long as Wanderer’s unstoppable sadistic streak was turning you on more and more, Kazuha’s praises contrasting Wanderer’s degradations was absolute music to your ears. You could feel yourself getting tighter and tighter, closer and closer to climax whenever anything related to you came out their mouths, creating a paradox of having your dignity destroyed and recovered over and over again.

.

“I’m going to take her to a hotel and take care of her, go home.” You could hear Wanderer’s voice speaking above of you.

You don’t know where you are, nor what time it is, but you could feel your body being held by something in the air.

“Can I take her or come with you? I really want to spend more time with her…” You heard Kazuha’s voice slightly echoing in your ears, but you couldn’t see him.

He still sounded drunk. He actually sounded even more drunk.

“Fuck no, you can barely stand up and I don’t want another man sleeping on my bed! Especially one that I don’t know!” Wanderer screamed.

Did you really pass out?

“I mean… you’ve seen my dick and I’ve seen yours too! There isn’t anything to hide anymore!” He said, as excited as a kid.

Kazuha was really another man when he was drunk, wasn’t he?

“Of course there is! And, it’s her decision rather she wants to see us again or not. We literally just fucked her brains out in a bathroom stall, I would never want to see us again if I was her.”

And maybe he’s right.

“Oh-ho? Now you’re being protective of her? You’re the reason why she’s asleep in the first place!” Kazuha mocked.

Is he? You still have a slight fragment of the memory of the orgasm Wanderer brought you to have… right before your eyes closed and your head bonked in Kazuha’s lap.

“Shut up!” He demanded, pulling his hat down to cover his face but that just helped you to see him better, his cheeks were going pink.

After all, he was carrying you in his arms.

“Go, take her home. I’ll clean up the mess we made.” Kazuha said to Wanderer, and he finally started started walking with you in his arms.

What the fuck did just happen?

#genshin impact #genshin smut #genshin x reader #smut #genshin scara #scaramouche #scara x reader #kaedehara kazuha #kazuha x reader #genshin kazuha #kazuha #wanderer genshin #wanderer #wanderer x reader

[vikkirosko]

Can I request Lute, Adam, Sera, Emily and Charlie (separately and platonic) with Death Reader ?

Being Death, reader is the one in charge of the souls of humans and all the paperwork it implies (like in the game "Have a nice Death" where Death is the CEO of his own business). But what no one known beside the workers of Death INC, is that Death also has to deal with the paperwork and transfert of souls between the realms. So, when a soul die in hell, it's more paperwork for reader.

Let say that the yearly exterminations only worsen reader's patience.

After centuries of intense work with zero vacations, reader is really tense and on the edge of making a burnout. Not knowing why so much demons die every years and why there is so much souls in hell.

When Charlie comes to her office to ask her support for convincing the seraphims to allow redemption. Reader is like "Wait what ?". Reader realizes that it's the angel's fault if she is overwhelmed with work, and snaps.

Now the angels will have to face a furious, near burnout Reader who will have their vacations at Bora-Bora, and if the angels don't agree with that, it's not her problem.

Thank

Platonic headcanons Death

🌈 Charlie Morningstar x Reader 🎶

Charlie knew that besides Hell, Heaven and human world, there was another place. It was a huge corporation located between the worlds and you, Death, were in charge of this organization in person. Charlie didn't see you in person, and her parents always said that you were very busy with your work, because you had a huge responsibility. You were responsible for the souls of people. That's why Charlie decided that you could support her idea of rehabilitating sinners and convince the angels. However, when she came to your office, she was very surprised. You were sitting at a table surrounded by a huge amount of documents and looked like you were going to pass out from overwork a little more

You directly told her to speak quickly, because you had a lot of work to do. Charlie didn't want to distract you too much, so she tried to explain everything quickly, but when she mentioned the extermination, you looked up from the documents and looked at her, and then asked what she meant. As it turned out, you had no idea what the angels were doing. The princess's story made your hands tremble and you told her that she could count on your support and that you would come. But when the day of the meeting with the angels came, no one expected your arrival, and even Charlie did not expect how bad a mood you would be in

You didn't let Sera or Adam say a word. You accused them of making you have a lot more work because of their pride and stupidity. You didn't try to smooth out the corners or be gentle in your expressions. You were telling it like it is, bluntly stating the exterminations. You saw that many angels didn't know about it, but you didn't care. You've been working without a single day off for centuries, and the news that you have even more work every year because of the angels has finally overwhelmed your patience

You explicitly stated that you were not going to put up with this anymore, and that you were going on vacation to Bora Bora. When Sera just wanted to say that you still have a job, you looked at her with such a frightening look that she fell silent. You said that since the angels created all these problems, then let them deal with them themselves, and also that if this extermination happens again, then you will not be as restrained as you were at that meeting. Charlie was staring at you with her eyes wide open. Before you left, you wished her luck and said that after the vacation, you would bring her a souvenir for opening your eyes to what was happening. She didn't know exactly when you were coming, but she definitely wanted to see you again

🎸 Adam x Reader ✨️

For Adam, death was an event of bygone days. He had lived in Heaven for too long to worry about someone's life ending, and even more so he did not worry about the sinners who were killed during the exterminations. He had once heard that there was an organization that Death was running, but he had never seen either this organization or you. At least until the day came when Charlie came to Heaven. You came with her that day

For a long time you were silent, watching the conversation between the princess and the others, while you silently watched what was happening, but the more Adam talked, the more annoyed your expression became. In the end, your patience ran out and you interrupted him, raising your voice and accusing him of increasing the amount of work you have to do because of his stupid actions

Adam tried to argue with you, but you didn't give him a chance to get a word in. You were terrible in anger, and your anger was only intensified by the fact that in all the long centuries you have never had a vacation. You worked tirelessly, without days off, and instead of being grateful to you for your work, the angels only increase your workload and you were not going to tolerate it anymore

You said that since the angels had caused big problems, now they will deal with the consequences, and you were going to go on your first vacation and go to Bora Bora. Adam could feel Sera's eyes on him, and he knew that he was causing problems, but he didn't feel guilty. He was mad at you because you had been doing your job for so long, and now you decided to show your character. Adam didn't know how he was going to handle it, but he wasn't going to let you and Charlie win

✖️ Lute x Reader 🗡

Lute knew that Death was responsible for the distribution of souls. She had never seen you in person, but Lute understood that you clearly had a lot of work to do. She didn't care, and at some point she stopped thinking about it at all. These weren't her problems and she wasn't going to waste her time worrying about other people's problems. That's what she thought until you came to Heaven with Charlie, who wanted the extermination to stop

You stated that you are going to Bora Bora on vacation. You didn't care how the angels planned to deal with problems, but you supported the idea of a princess, because it would make life easier for everyone, including you. Lute was furious. She looked at you and realized that if it wasn't for you, Charlie's words might not have been taken seriously. But you decided to step in and now she and Adam had obvious problems

✨️ Sera x Reader 💫

When Sera allowed Adam to destroy sinners, she understood that at some point you might have noticed it. You have known each other for a long time, because you were Death and have existed since the beginning of time. You had a whole corporation now, but you still did a lot of things on your own. But Sera was sure that you would not pay attention to the fact that several dozen sinners would die, because many deaths happened every day and you always had a lot of work. However, her faith was shaken when you came with Charlie to Heaven

She felt your piercing gaze on her and knew that you knew everything. You weren't going to leave it just like that. Perhaps it was thanks to Charlie that you found out the truth after so many years. You were silent, watching the negotiations between the angels and the princess, but your patience quickly ran out. You demanded an explanation from them about the exterminations. Your words caused a commotion, and then you turned directly to Sera, asking how she even dared to allow such a thing and how she dares to decide who is worthy to go to Heaven and who is not, because it was your job

Sera tried to explain to you and Emily that everything was not as simple as it seemed at first glance, but you were not going to believe it, understanding how things really are. You said that since she was sure that she knew everything better than anyone else, she could deal with the problems that she had created on her own. You weren't going to lift a finger in order to make her job a little easier, on the contrary, you intended to complicate it

You went to Bora Bora on vacation. Sera understood that she had made a mistake, but she could not change anything. She had a lot of problems to deal with, and all she could hope for was that you would return from your vacation earlier and change your anger to mercy

👁 Emily x Reader ✨️

For a long time, Emily lived in happy ignorance. She lived confident that everything was fine, sometimes visiting you. From Sera, she learned about your corporation and how to get there. You were Death and you always had a lot of work and that's why she sometimes brought you a snack. You treated her with gentleness, because she was the only one who really visited you and expressed gratitude for your work. However, you never came to Heaven until you came there with Charlie

Emily was watching you and didn't understand what happened. You were in a disgusting mood, but you were silent, often casting an aggressive look at Sera. But her misunderstanding quickly disappeared when your patience ran out. You accused the angels of having a huge amount of work to do because of the exterminations they were guilty of. Emily couldn't believe it was true, but Death never lied and she knew it

You stated that you worked hard and every year you didn't understand why sinners died so much, but not only did you not have time for a vacation, you didn't even have time to deal with these oddities. But now you knew the truth. Emily shared your anger, because she's been living a lie all this time

When the meeting was over, you said that since the angels had created so many problems, now they themselves must deal with them, and you were waiting for the first vacation in your entire existence to Bora Bora. You only stayed to tell Emily that you hoped she would continue to be a pure light in Heaven and could help Charlie make both Hell and Heaven better

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel headcanons #Charlie Morningstar #Charlie Morningstar x Reader #Adam #Adam x Reader #Lute #Lute x Reader #Sera #Sera x Reader #Emily #Emily x Reader

[penspolin]

Benedict Bridgerton & Freedom: A Character Study

I think many would agree that Benedict Bridgerton's storyline in season 3 so far has been rather stagnant, potentially deja-vu-inducing. Benedict pursuing an unconventional love interest is nothing we have not already seen from the series. But despite the cyclical nature of Ben's plot, it could suggest more about his characterization (more specifically, his subconscious desperation) than what first meets the eye.

Art & Societal Detachment

Much of Benedict's plot in seasons 1 and 2 revolved around his relationship with art. Symbolically, art is a means of escape from the real world, just as it is a means of interpreting that world or one's place within it. Since both Colin and Benedict struggle with society (in similar, yet still different, ways), it only feels right that Colin feels a personal connection with writing while Benedict expresses himself through art.

It goes without saying that Benedict has poured his soul into his artistic pursuits; it is a part of him, and so naturally the revelation that Anthony bought his place in art school is a massive blow to his self-confidence. Colin experiences something similar: it's as if both brothers are struggling with this question of what it means to be themselves, not merely "Bridgertons" (side note, but the series title is interesting to me in that it calls upon the family's reputation, despite that reputation creating conflict in so many of the characters' stories).

Benedict makes several comments throughout the show that serve other characters' plots, but they speak so much to how he sees the world. For example, in S2 he tells Anthony:

"Poetry is the art of revealing precious truth with words."

By suggesting that poetry "reveals" something else, Benedict is implying that the world is made up of concealed truths. In other words, art is a means of seeing the world (and society at large) more clearly. Which brings me to...

Freedom (& Tilley Arnold)

Season 3 Benedict feels purposeless. The promotional material has indicated as much, and we saw it early when his only means of fulfillment (performing Anthony's Viscount duties while he was away on honeymoon) was taken away.

Season 3 Colin rejects society internally but tries to embrace it outwardly. Benedict has played the part himself before, but he's never pretended to enjoy it (see: his dancing at balls this season).

Ben is a rake, but he's not the kind that chases women to build his reputation. Colin was a rake to fit in, but Benedict is a rake because...well, because he wants to be. An important distinction. The similarity with Colin, however, is revealed through a conversation between Benedict and Mondrich.

Benedict views society as a cage outside of marriage. Once one becomes married, they become free. He even uses that word (a season 4 hint, perhaps? Could Ben's next pursuit of 'freedom' be finding the love of his life?).

We know Benedict hates these imposed restrictions. The most fascinating thing is that even when he has lost a huge part of his identity, Ben is still inherently searching for something, someone, to represent that detachment from society that he so craves. It's why he seems so disinterested in courting--why he runs anytime he is forced into the "societal" box. He is subconsciously searching for anything that removes him from this box...and who better than a bold, unconforming widow?

In my eyes, if Benedict falls in love with Tilley Arnold, that ultimately says more about him psychologically than any true bond between them. It is the idea of her that he falls back on so strongly after the blow he's suffered losing his art, the one thing that made him feel whole. She's temporarily filling a void.

Masquerade

Last point--the symbolism of masquerades. It's an interesting contradiction that concealing one's physical identity is actually exposing one's inner identity. That is to say, the writers have a chance to play with these ideas--self-expression, freedom, facades, escapism, etc.--at the masquerade ball (whenever we see it). It's such a poetic representation of what Benedict is searching for. I'd argue it's almost all subconscious at this point. Benedict seemed so sure of himself when he had art, but now the tables have turned on him--he's like Colin in S2: purposeless. The brothers' stories mirror each other, but the resolution of their problems is unique.

Here's hoping the showrunners/writers take advantage of the opportunity to do something more with Benedict's character in the second half of season 3. And fingers crossed this is all gearing up for Benedict as S4's lead. Seeing Colin in the spotlight in S3 presents a nice comparison with Benedict's own struggles.

#bridgerton #bridgerton season 3 #bridgerton s3 #benedict bridgerton #benedict #colin bridgerton #Bridgerton meta #benophie #luke thompson #luke newton #bridgerton season3 #meta #bridgerton s3 spoilers #benedict x sophie #bridgerton series #bridgerton meta #bridgerton analysis

[penvisions]

gone to the dogs {chapter 2}

Pairing: Boston QZ! Joel Miller x F! Reader, brief mention of Joel Miller x Tess Servopoulos

Summary: You set off to scout for a meeting with the man Tess has been in contact with over the radio. Only to find out it’s two men and you know one of them.

Word Count: 7.5k

Warnings: canon typical violence, canon typical language, canon typical gore, outbreak fic, age gap (only by about ten years), dark fic, dark joel miller, mean joel miller, joel miller is uptight, degrading language, sexual language, sexual proposition, violence, heated interactions, adult language, fighting, argumentative language, mutual disdain, sexual content, implication of sex work, unprotected piv (mentioned), sexual acts, choking, oral (m and f receiving), dom/sub dynamics if you squint, joel is bossy, some 69 action (idk don't look at me), anal play, reader is snarky, reader meets joel toe-to-toe with insults and it's amazing both reader and joel pov, lemme know if there are any i missed!

*we have a nickname reveal, in reference to one of the most known guard dog breeds (cause i think i'm funny lol)

A/N: something possessed me and the next thing i know this chapter was on the word document. don't look at me, i have no clue what i'm doing 🫣okay, bye

ao3 link || series masterlist || navigation || ko-fi

It was dark, curfew for the zone only an hour off. The sparse streetlights illuminating the rather humiliating display of the street, outlined with bodies hidden in the shadows of stoops, of power lines chaotically spread out above, of the dirt and grime that seemed to coat every fucking inch of what the world had become. Despite the strict regulations of cleanliness, trash and debris from the ravage of bombs dropped on the larger cities lingered about. The roads barely maintained and only for the vehicles controlled by FEDRA.

It wasn’t the most sanitary of places to live, but you made it work for you. Clinging to life, even if it was a shadow of what that once meant. You tried not to dwell on that line of thinking for too long.

But you hummed a little as you felt the weight of a thick stack of ration cards tucked into your back pocket. This particular part of the zone was known for its more…salacious activity and trade. A place you knew would be ripe with rewards for very little work on your part. The feeling of drying spend wasn’t a comfortable one, as it stuck and hardened on the skin of your stomach and back. But it was a small price to pay for a months’ worth of food and the small smirk from Joel and Tess once you handed over some of the cards.

Earn your keep, that had been the only rule barked at you when first hashing out understands for your partnership with them both. Joel had seemed to stare into your very soul to get the point across, while Tess had been far more cordial, seeking you out after finding you to be one of the best scouts whose services were fought after. Before they had shown up in the dingy zone, you had been a free agent. A rather successful one on your own. Hopping from one smuggler to the next if their offers were good enough, but with those two it had all stopped. You were loyal to them now.  Circumstance and mild comfortability in favor of constantly watching out for deals gone bad or men who thought you were a part of them.

And you agreed to an even split if it meant they would watch your back. They had come to you after all, you needed a little more from the deal if you were willingly work with only two people as opposed to those who sought you out and who you knew would trade what you asked for. The timing of their arrival one of the few good things you believed to be whatever higher power existed smiling down on you with pity. The loss of your brother had been harsh, hung in front of a crowd and practically announcing to the zone you no longer had protection.

You could hold your own as well as needed, but the world was cruel. You had been offered less than satisfactory terms since his death, cajoled into doing jobs under threat of report and even the barrel of a gun or two. It had been a tough two years of trying to maintain your reputation, a few lives lost in the endeavor when you had been challenged in ways you refused to put up with.

The first had been a man who had taken it upon himself to be your new ‘alpha’, to watch over you and ensure you were safe under his vigilant eye. But his name hadn’t carried the same weight at your own, the nickname ascribed to you accurate for a once well-known breed of guard dog. When he had tried to force you to submit to him, you had torn into his neck with nothing but your teeth, hands tied behind your back as you woke to the man in your apartment once news of your brother’s passing had spread to every corner of the zone.

Another had been a woman who attempted to sell you out to the very soldiers who relied on you for narcotics. She had found herself thrown into a cell and once released she had come at you with a knife while you worked a job around the city under the guise of falling in line with every other citizen. The exchange had ended with her clutching to the knife imbedded in thigh and you with a long red marks from her nails as she had screamed at your resistance to be taken out.

People had been willing to work with you, knowing the knowledge you had was abundant and the things you offered for trade were scarce. But as with everything, things had begun to dry up. The longer time went on, the harder it was to maintain the abundance of items deemed contraband or frivolous. But the stash you had hidden held on for quite a while. Posing as another version of yourself, you had stolen entire collections from people who were new to the zone and decided to try and work around you or shoulder you out of the scene. Not knowing it was you people were referring to when the name Cane was spoken until they took their last breath or mysteriously disappeared as soon as they had arrived.

Until Joel and Tess.

They had staked you out, gone into your apartment to get a feel for who you were but when faced with the consequences of their actions, they had been willing to talk it out. Someone must’ve warned them that newcomers who weren’t willing to play along with how things operated here disappeared or were found dead, a warning in and of itself for them. They had expected to just do recon, to see what you had going on with the aid of Tommy Miller down the hall as a lookout. A scout.

But they hadn’t known that’s what you were above all. Aware of your surroundings at all times, never caught without your guard down. Tommy had been taken out long before you had entered your apartment that night. The first signal that something was different. The younger Miller brother had gotten flustered at your approach, offering the man a night of pleasure since he was new and deserved to see what the zone had to offer. He had been knocked out cold before he could even answer your feigned advance. He often stayed behind, letting his two companions work alongside you while he tried to keep his head down and do as FEDRA asked. Something Joel said he was a fool to do, but didn’t dissuade him from.

He had revealed that his longer absences from the apartment they had been assigned, right beside yours, were because of his work with the group known as the Fireflies. Some members of which you used to do work with. Warning him of their willingness to cause chaos in ways they though were liberating but ended up being destructive and damning. But he hadn’t heeded your genuine words born of concern. Not wanting him to face the same fate as your bother. Joel had been even more difficult to work with when Tommy had disappeared one day with nothing but a note saying he was with a group of them assigned for relocation. He had been even more brutal since then not even a year after they had arrived, the sting of betrayal and abandonment needing to be let out somehow. And Joel Miller was capable of great brutality.

He also happened to be stepping out from a shadowed awning just across the street. An ununiformed officer slinking away with a tight grip on something in his hand.

The satisfaction of having just duped some poor suckers out of their cards shifted to something else, something akin to shame at being caught with muzzle in something that wasn’t yours to be had. You had hidden the…visits you made here from your brother, something you had done with you both first arrived in the desolate excuse of a zone. Lectured and pleaded with once he had found out, begging you to stop because it wasn’t what he wanted for you, what he didn’t want you to feel like you had to do. But you did and that was the stark truth. It was always something you could fall back on.

“What the hell are you doing?” Joel’s words were sharp, his chocolate curls tousled in the wind you had to shake the urge to reach up and tangle your hands in them.

“Conducting business. Same as you.” The words are spit from your twisted mouth, not liking the tone he approached you with or the hard glare that molded his features. What you were doing was none of his concern, you didn’t belong to him. You didn’t like how your body was responding to him lately, and you idly wondered if your finicky cycle was about to make a rare resurgence.

“The only business here is…” His eyes flick to the crumbling building behind you, a well-known house of pleasure. The man who had just been inside you exited and jaunted down the steps, pausing as he noticed the two of you staring each other down. When Joel’s eyes focused on him, he took off at a brisk pace.

“Yup.” You turned and started walking back toward the center of the zone.

“Didn’t take you for a whore.” Steps not faltering as he falls in line beside you, it’s easy to shrug off his slight judgement. It had only been a year of working with him, but you knew him well enough to know that if he really didn’t like something he would just silently brood over it. Whatever he was trying to do now, was simply get a rise out of you just for the sake of doing it. He was cheeky in his own way, even if it was always at your expense. But the same could be said of you, you always berated him for not listening completely to things you and Tess discussed.

“Well, this whore just earned all three of us a month’s worth of cards. Each.”

“And you’re proud of that, aren’t ya? Whorin’ yourself out for a little food.” He digs his claws in deeper, when he doesn’t get the reaction he was expecting. But it was late and you truly weren’t bothered by his words. He was right, you had just sold your body. It was your right as a woman to do with your body as you pleased and if it earned you something then, what? Shame wasn’t something you let yourself feel, not for this. The only negative thing about spending your time at the pleasure house was that you never left with the same satisfaction of your clients. The men weren’t there for that, they went for themselves and themselves alone.

“You took all the pills for your trades. Didn’t leave me much to trade with.” You throw back at him with only a slight uptick of volume, but your words held the truth. Tess had given him all of the pills from yesterdays’ foray into what remained of the city around the zone. You had been given the firearms, opting to keep them as part of your stash for the time being instead of trading them.

“You could’ve asked for some.” He’s looking straight ahead when you turn to see him a little more clearly in your periphery. His profile is strong, the hook of his nose and the fullness of his lips obvious against the streetlights.

“I don’t ask for things I can’t afford. Not from anyone and certainly not from you.” You can’t help the bite in your words, as if the idea of him willingly giving you a part of what he intended to trade was even fathomable. He may be the muscle of the group, the attack dog people kept their eyes on and ears on alert for. But even so, he also did nearly as much legwork as you did, if not more at this point. You and Tess working together to orchestrate the trades and caches of contraband to steal or loot.

“Fine.” He grunts, hands shoved in his front pockets.

“Fine.” You parrot, not willing to let him have the last word.

When you turned at the entrance of an alley, he didn’t see the shadow of the person lying in wait until they shifted. But you seemed to have known they were going to be there, because you were suddenly ducking beneath the person’s reaching arms and slamming their front to into the brick. The woman shouted out as her forehead thudded harshly against the wall, her arms twisted behind her back and tight in your grip.

“I told you last time, no payment no pills.” Your voice is threateningly low as you crowd against the woman who had tried to ambush you. Joel only watches, his gaze heavy on your back as you hold your own. Showing no mercy to the woman whose position you easily could’ve fallen into yourself. But you had stopped the excessive use, opting to trade nearly everything you could and only keeping a minor stash for yourself should you need to make a run for it.

“He-he told me to!”

“Don’t care, you come at me again, either of you and I’ll cut you in your sleep.”

“You would-wouldn’t!”

“Wanna try me?” You pull her away from the wall, the dull streetlights illuminating her bloodied and tear-stained face. “Go home. Find me when you have what I want.”

“Y-yes, I’m so sorry, Cane.”

When you turn your back on the alley, the woman running through the narrow space and out the other side, Joel is merely standing there with his arms crossed. Denim pulled taut over his broad shoulders and biceps at the stance. His lips are upturned a bit, his eyes dark in the fallen night, but it isn’t until you glance down at his waist are you sure of what he was really thinking.

The hard outline of him through the denim of his jeans is obvious. He had gotten turned on, aroused, and it sends a thrill of proud excitement through your own body. Whether it was from either seeing you walk out of a well-known pleasure house, beat up an empty-handed solicitor, or both you weren’t sure.

But you tilted your head back as you sauntered up to him as close as you could. Apparently, that was more than okay with him because you pushed your chest against his crossed arms, the soft give of them pressed to his forearms while you trailed a finger lightly over his zipper. The hinge of his jaw jumped, the muscle there twitching from the barely there touch, his brow furrowing as he looked down to catch your glittering eyes.

“Wanna take up that offer for relief?”

“Thought you didn’t ask for things you couldn’t afford.” His words are hard, though you see through them, through him. He wasn’t going to outright ask you, he never would.

“I could certainly afford to lose an evening spent prying open a can of too-old green beans if it means you’d calm the hell down a bit.”

“What makes you think I need you for that?” He cocks his head to the side slightly, mirth dancing behind his eyes as he notices he one upped you. Because damn if he hadn’t. You knew him and Tess were…whatever it was they were. The way he listened to her and made sure she had what she needed was first on his priorities from day one, it was obvious. A man like him seemed to need someone to look after, his purpose was her livelihood. And she was his. Even if they weren’t obvious about it, the signs were there.

The every so often thuds of their bed against the wall, the moans and panting breath that sounded as if it was in your own apartment and not theirs next door, the way Joel walked a little straighter the next day and Tess was a little more willing to go along with plans that didn’t have great payoffs with the argument that it was at least something.

It was something that was unspoken between all three of you, something Tommy had only brought up twice with you when you were both alone. He hadn’t been jealous, at least not in the way that made you feel sorry for him. It was because he didn’t see a point to it if it wasn’t genuine and if he had learned anything in the collapse of the world, it was that his older brother was all the things he never thought he would be. That he knew it was a way for Joel to feel wanted and useful, something he was jealous of only because he had once been someone who relied on his brother. Still had until the second he left, unable to handle the decline of the person he had grown up with and cared for.

You couldn’t fault him for that. Sibling relationships and dynamics were hard even when the world was good. The demise of someone wasn’t always of bloodshed, infection, or the quieting of their heart. It was sometimes the inability to recognize and the horror of realization that it had been a long time since you had been able to see them as they were. It had been too much for Tommy, you didn’t fault him for running. But it left you with the obviously bonded pair he had left behind and for that you cursed him.

Your own loneliness apparent when the only person you could call a ‘friend’ had left you behind too.

“Didn’t wanna fuckin’ touch you anyway.” Voice level, you realize you weren’t in the mood to play with him now his harsh denial floats in the thick air between you.

The combination of your melancholy thoughts and Joel’s words stings and you turn away from him, boots barely guiding you away before your arm is in the man’s grip and he’s turning you back to face him with a harsh jerk.

“Hey, that wasn’t a no.”

“Sure as hell sounded like it to me.” You try to yank your arm back from him, to put as much distance between you as possible, only he tightens his grip.

“Don’t offer shit if you’re not gonna follow up.” He reprimands, voice low with the edge of a threat.

“Go find Tess.” You feel your lips curl around the woman’s name.

“Don’t want Tess.” His words shouldn’t have the effect on you that they do. But the dissatisfaction of not finding your own release hits you like a weight. The visits you made to that part of the zone always disappointing in that department. Your pleasure was never the goal. Your body begins to hum at the implication of them, at the implication of him wanting you.

“Too bad, you picked the wrong moment to feign disinterest and I don’t wanna play with you anymore.”

“That all it is, playin’?”

“Only thing it could be, you don’t seriously think I want you, do you?”

“I think you’re afraid to admit you do, yeah.”

“I could go straight back to that pleasure house and get what I need.”

“Yeah, but it ain’t what you want. ‘Cause I’m standing right here.”

“You’re so full of yourself,” Turning your back on him, you ascend the few steps into the main floor of the apartment building. He’s right behind you, the heat of his body only a few steps of distance away. He manages to keep up as you quickly scale the stairs up to the floor your apartments are on. The sensation of being chased prickles your skin into goosebumps, it raises the hairs on the back of your neck and makes your cunt throb in anticipation of being caught.

“Think you wanna be full a’me, otherwise you wouldn’t offer so damn much.” The thought sends a spark of arousal straight down your spine, igniting the smoldering kindling of your earlier activities as you finally step onto the flattened floor of your hall.

“Just tired of being around you when your dick is doing all the thinking. Makes it so I have to do twice as much work to keep things going smoothly.”

“Then clear my head, be a good little lap dog for me.”

“No. Told you I don’t wanna play with you anymore.”

“Too bad, cause I ain’t done with you.”

“Joel, I swear to fucking god-“

“You gotta learn to shut that god damn mouth when you’re ahead, darlin’.” Before you could blink, your back is being pressed up against his door. One of his thighs are between your legs and pressing up into your aching core, one of his hands is tight around your neck, pinning you between the hardness of the door and the strong line of his broad body. His eyes are looking between your own, his lips part to speak again but it isn’t what you were expecting.

“You scared?” He asks in a low voice, vulnerability and concern swirl in a shadow curling behind his words. He was making sure you were okay and really wanted this and the thought makes your body shiver. The thought that he wouldn’t truly engage with you this way if you didn’t want it is the bare fucking minimum but it rounds out into another full glimpse of the man he is, of who he used to be.

His other hand snakes around your waist once he’s got the door unlocked and it’s no longer holding you up.

The door is kicked shut behind him, the slam echoing through the hallway enough to insight a few shouts of dismay. But his focus is on you, only on you. His hooded eyes dark as he takes in the dilation of your pupils and the hitch of your breath as he corrals you toward the bed. Definitely not scared.

“Only part a you that listens, huh?” He sneaks a pair of thick fingers beneath the waistband and finds you already so slick. “This all you?”

“Don’t let cum in me, if that’s what you’re askin’.” His fingers are the perfect pressure as they dip between your folds, and you hear the sound he makes deep in his chest even if his lips remain shut. A chip in his usual demeanor, a small flicker of that same weakness you had stumbled on the first time you condescendingly offered to blow him.

“Good.” He rasps. “Sit down.”

“Mutual relief,” He grunts as he senses your quiet confusion, the heat of his intent rises up your chest and over the apples of your cheeks, brows furrowing as it doesn’t quite compute. Confusion gives way to a spark, that low simmering heat thrumming in your body catching fire and licking across your entire body. “That’s how we’re gonna do this, y’hear me? Won’t leave you like those other men. Now sit.”

You do, heeding the command as you attune to him, body jostling as you set yourself on the edge of his shared bed, everything else a blur around him. The apartment is barely illuminated by the streetlights trickling in through the sorry excuse of curtains still pulled back on the window. Just enough light to see him, to see how big he is as he begins to kneel before you, hands reaching for your jeans. You can only watch as he undoes them and peels them from your legs, the only pair you have that have molded to your body from years of relying on them. You’re about to ask him what he’s doing when he tilts his head up and your completely naked from the waist down.

“She’s gonna be back soon.” You don’t worry about getting caught but you’d rather not have an audience for the submission you were too weak to resist. Body responding to him with an intoxicating ease, the curiosity if what he means by mutual relief too much of a temptation. If there was anyone who was worthy of it, it was Joel, even if you loathed basically everything about him. Too similar and too rife with the same qualities and tendencies for violence, too much of a mirror of who you were at the very core of your soul.

“She’s busy setting up the meeting for tomorrow,” He’s suddenly standing, his own clothing being peeled away to land on the floor with your own. His chest is dusted with the same dark brown atop his head, his skin the same bronze of his forearms and weathered face. The rest of his body is just as beautiful as the parts you’re allowed to see. But now all of him is on display, languidly laid out atop the bed as he grips his impressive length in a fist, pumping once before he’s reaching for you.

He manhandles you to straddle his stomach, your slick shining on his hot skin as you’re suddenly face to face with his dripping cock. And it’s so beautiful you can’t help the moan that crawls it’s way up from your ribcage and past your lips as lean forward to grip him with a much smaller hand than his. He’s so thick you can barely wrap your hand around all of him, something he chuckles darkly over as you feel one of his palms land with a sharp slap along your ass. You know he’s watching the ripple of your skin, the irritation of his action spring to life on your skin, the goosebumps that chase the shiver that runs down your spine and you feel yourself flutter around nothing.

“I said,” He gripped your hips painfully tight in his large hands, blunt nails digging into your flesh and pulls you down completely. His nose bumps into your puffy clit and you can’t help but cry out at the bolt of pleasure that rips through you. “Sit the fuck down.”

You were gone before the first swipe of his tongue through your slick folds, just the hot breath from his perfectly pouty mouth was enough to make your body sing. When the wet heat of his tongue licked through your folds, your eyes flutter shut at the scintillating feeling, his palms are wide across your cheeks as he pulls them apart to see all of you and you gasp at the wet sound. You feel your skin pull and you’re keening out a pathetic sound as his nose bumps against the puckered hole previously hidden from him. The fire coursing over your body, trying to catch the air of the room outside your body to roar, it’s only spurred on by the feel of him, hungry and taking what he wanted from the most intimate part of you.

“C’mon now, use that mouth for somethin’ other than talkin’.” He takes a moment, the barest, to lean back and bark the words at you. There wasn’t anything mutual about you going limp in his grip and you feel the tug of humiliation at folding so quickly and forgetting who had started this whole exchange in the first place.

He’s teasing you. But two can play at that game, you think even as pleasure roils too hot through your veins. Gripping his proudly standing cock more firmly at the base, you lower yourself, back arching and thighs tightening around his middle and press feather light kisses to his ruddy, leaking tip.  

He’s surprisingly loud, from the rumbles you can feel vibrating deep in his chest, to the slurps of his mouth as it moves against you, to the heavy pants he breaths in an out when he dares to pull away from between your legs. He’s never this loud with her, and the thought sends a thrill through you causing you to gush around his tongue as it slips inside. You can’t help your own moan around the head of his cock as you swallow it down, swirling your tongue over him as you taste him for the first time.

The grunt that vibrates through your folds as you swallow him down is satisfaction enough. He’s heavy on your tongue, the slight curl of him as at the angle allows for the underside of his cock to nudge along the ridges of the roof of your mouth, his blunt nails digging into your skin. You feel the vein just as clearly and he throbs, causing drool to dribble down to his heavy sack.

His teeth close around your clit, nibbling there as you begin to bob up and down at a fast pace. He’s suddenly thrusting up, his hips canting at the sensation and you gag as he hits the back of your throat.

“Take it,” He husks, doing it again. You retaliate by pressing back against him, body flat atop his as you relax your throat for him to continue. The air is thick with the scent of mutual arousal, everything coated in slick and sweat, your plain shirt sticking to your skin as heat crackles in the stagnant air. The smell of him is heady, all musk and something distinctly him as your nose nestles in the thatch of coarse hairs that he doesn’t keep trimmed, the soft velvet of his sack so hot against your face.

You hum as he stills, his thighs shaking beneath your hands as you try to support yourself. He slips from your mouth and the heft of him slaps into your cheek as you cry out at the intrusion of a slick thumb. You feel his grin as he nudges the digit further into your puckered hole, a sensation you hadn’t felt before.

“Never had anyone in here.” He boldly preens, reading the way your own body begins to tremble as you gush, there’s no way he missed it being buried in your cunt. Your only response is to grip him with one hand and resume a brutal pace, breath barely squeezing through your nostrils as you take him as deep as you can again and again. It’s loud, it’s lewd, it’s intoxicating the way he slurps and licks, nibbles and presses. The scratch of his facial hair against your inner thighs lighting you up, building up heat and pleasure in your lower abdomen. He’s twitching, from his fingers to his cock, to the thick thighs beneath you.

It's brutal the way you’re pushed to the edge, the fire taking your body for its own, brought on by unforgiving pace matched by unforgiving pace. Two people still playing for dominance even as you both relish in the tantalizing pleasure of the game. He seems determined to get you there before he finds his own release, and you clench around him he pushes you over the edge, his tongue lapping up everything you’ve given him as you feel his own muscles tense, before he’s spilling hot down your throat at the feeling of your suppressed moan all around him.

Panting, you release him from your mouth, swallowing down everything he had given you in return. The tart taste of him something you never anticipated getting a taste of. Your thighs burn as you push yourself up, the overwhelming dribble of his saliva and the remnants of your release are obvious as your cunt presses to his chest. You’re sure he can see the small bubbles of it as your folds close together, hiding from him where he had just buried his face. He seems to disagree with the shift in position because you’re suddenly face down on the covers of the bed, ass up in the air as he drapes himself over your back.

His thick fingers effortlessly trace your slit, fingers sparking another crest as he plunges two deep into your still fluttering core. You can’t bite back the guttural sound that claws its way from your chest as he curls them and begins to press them against a spot that most men ignore. You feel the length of him soft against the back of your thighs, unable to get it up again so soon after his own release, but it’s like he knows he could pull another orgasm from your willing body.

You hear the crack of his wrist as he pounds his fingers into you, straightening them out for the tips to kiss that spot deep inside and you cry out when he finds it. Head shooting up from the bed as your back arches in a silent plea for more.

“There it is, feels good don’t it, darlin’?” His words are gravel in your ear, the burn of his scruff against your neck welcome as he pushes you over the edge again far too quickly. The moan that rips from you is loud, nearly a wail in its intensity. Something he’s guaranteed to comment on. But he surprises you when he buries his nose into your hair as you clench and gush around his fingers. Nothing but an answering moan of his own floats into the air.

As suddenly as he had been on you, he’s no longer pressed against you. The heat of his body gone in the slow blink of an eye and shuddering pull of breath.

He’s across the room with a creak of the mattress and a shift of the floorboards under his weight. The sound of the shower being turned on is the only clue as to where he’s gone when you turn your head in search of him. Your body is shaky as you move into a normal position, the one you started in, perched at the edge of his shared bed. You quickly pull on your socks, your jeans, stuff your feet into the boots he had unlaced and shucked from you in his haste. Your underwear is nowhere to be found and you don’t linger on what that could mean as you exit the apartment.

An hour later you’re slinking through the space beneath a stretch of chain link fence, pulling the board of plywood that settles over it as another pair of hands disperses dirt over it to hide the hole. Your mind is calm, but your chest feels like an overinflated balloon as you seem to hold your breath for far too long.

Only once the lights of the zone are a mile behind you, do you stop and let it all out in a heavy exhale.

“We leavin’ before the sun or after?” Joel breaths the words out on a heavy exhale, his heart beating fast in beneath his ribs. Tess takes a moment to catch her own breath before she grants him an answer, reaching over for the water glass sweating on the floor beside the bed. Her eyes trail over the naked expanse of his chest, fingers reaching to comb through the hair beginning to show the same threading of silver as the hair atop his head. He doesn’t feel anything when she does, his body satiated from the shared pleasure he had initiated in his half-asleep state after hearing people begin to stir all along the hall in the early hour.

Her breasts catch his eye, the way the jiggle and sway with her motions to slump back against the collection of flat pillows at the head of the bed. He idly wonders what you’ve got hidden beneath your own clothing and as soon as the thought crosses his mind, he frowns. She turns to him, after her own eyes drag up his body, from the knee he props up to relieve his back a little, the softening bulge of him hidden beneath the sheet, to the way he watches her with something behind his eyes.

“Before. Cane’s already left. We don’t have the advantage of her helping guide us in person.”

“What?” He sits up, the sheet falling to hide his lap as his knee flattens.

“She left hours ago. Weren’t you paying attention?” Tess doesn’t budge, though it’s obvious that his reaction is unusual and he knows she’s thinking it.

“Stupid girl,” He mutters as he stands, the sheet falling from him completely as he reaches to pull on his discarded jeans. The belt clinks as he fastens it, but Tess doesn’t move at all.

“She can handle her own, Joel. You’ve seen it firsthand.”

“That’s all fine and dandy but this is a new trade partner. And you’ve been the only one in contact with them. Through the radio. Could be a trap.”

“You think I’m stupid enough to send out our scout into a potential trap?”

“Think we shoulda all left together, is all.”

“Why are you worried about her?”

“I’m not, don’t put words in my mouth.” He balks, unable to tame his anger at being scrutinized. He knows he’s acting out of character, but the possibility of there being a threat is real. If you’re really out beyond the parameters of the zone and well past the city limits there’s no where for you to seek cover.

“Joel-“

“Drop it, Tess.” He barks, unable to hide his frustration, to tame it as it flares as quickly and rapidly as a wildfire.

“Alright.” She pushes up from the bed, padding through their shared space bare as she gathers a clean pair of clothes and shuts the bathroom door behind her. Joel knows the scent of sex lingered in the stagnant air of the apartment, that she would be able to tell if was different from times before. Because it hadn’t been just him taking seeking pleasure, he had been doing so with you. As frustrating and bullheaded and downright petulant as you were, there was no denying the scent of you two tangled up that had encompassed the room in such a heady way.

Grunting, Joel rests on the edge of the bed. Adrenaline coursing through his veins as he recalls the night before. He had been rash in his decision to take you up on your offer, the second in as many days, for some ‘relief to calm him the hell down’ as you put it. A line had been crossed but he was like a dog after his first taste of actual food, craving and hungry for more. Willing to get it at any cost and the want burns his skin, boils his blood, consumes him. You had been his for that small bubble of time and he feels the possession sear as it brands him into a different man.

He wasn’t daft, he knew you had soft spots beneath all that rough and violent exterior. Everyone did. But he hadn’t expected to obsess over how sweet it had been for you to roll over and show him, to submit to him the way you had. The way he had with you in return, even if you weren’t aware of it. But the obsession to have rid you of the smell of the other men that had touched you, marked you, filled you had been too much. He wanted them all to smell the lingering scent of him on your skin the next time you decided to visit that pleasure house. And that was the thought that didn’t sit well with him. You weren’t his beyond the activities of the night before. And he didn’t want you any more than a dog in heat, your supple skin and taunting words just the trigger to pull the desire from him.

There was no use for desire in what the world had turned into, crumbled into during the last seven years.

The last time he desired, he wanted, he truly felt, had ended in devastation.

It’s well into the day, the sun at its apex as the two of them come into view and your mind quiets a little.

They make such a good-looking pair, you can’t help but think as they walk through the brush into the opening that houses the remains of a quickie mart. You’re sat on the hard ground, the asphalt long cracked and dried, no longer upholding the meaning of its given namesake. Nothing was secure in this world, especially the things created and molded by the hands of man. Nature had taken it all back, destroyed what it didn’t like and infected the rest it couldn’t.

“They check out?”

“Yes, two men. Just like you said.” You stand, ignoring the crackling of your joints as you do so, aware that you look far less put together than either of them. You had been rash and immediately after your time in their shared apartment, unwilling to toss and turn in your own bed with your ears on alert for signs of the woman’s return. You had nothing against her, she was good once and maybe still wanted to be beneath it all. There wasn’t some unspoken rule that they were each other’s but you still felt like you had maybe crossed a line, the minute guilt making your stomach churn as you took in the effort she had put into looking nice for today.

Your mind replayed the feeling of Joel’s mouth on you and it brought a scowl to your face as you realized even he looked rather put together. They made a good pair, and you were just on the outskirts. A lap dog indeed, even if they had come to you. Fuck, it made you feel like the weak link, even if deep down you knew you weren’t. They were both smart, strong, cunning, but they still struggled to understand the ways in which you undermined and ensured different paths in and out of the zone. How you seemed to always know who had what to trade and how to get their supply from them with just the right trade offer or threat. They were good, separately and together, but you were better adapted to the zone’s particulars. Better at reading people, even if it meant you could read into your own actions and feelings just as easily.

“They’ve got the whole town secure. Electric fence, operated by one control panel and two remotes. It’s strong, has a sensor if anything touches it. Saw a squirrel get fried. They’ve laid traps all around, some are covered pits, really well hidden. Some are spring traps, a bear trap or two, marks are nondescript and someone not looking for them wouldn’t notice them.”

“But you did.” Joel’s tone drips in disbelief, not at your ability to gather all of the information but that you had practically fled the second he left you alone on the bed the night before to do so.

“Yes.” You don’t look at him, instead keeping eye contact with Tess. “They both around the perimeter in the morning and evenings, it looks like they’re doing it to keep in shape but one of them always has his eyes on the fence. He’s constantly checking for weak points, for repairs or modifications that can be made. There also seems to be cannisters hidden a few feet beneath the main posts for the fence, every fifteen feet or so. Piping runs down to them, I didn’t dig one up but it seems like they may have some sort of fuel. For either a deterrent of an explosion, which I doubt because then it would compromise the structure of the fence, or a flame thrower of some sort to catch people off guard should they get too close and trigger it.”

“You found all that out in just a couple hours?” Tess must share in the man’s sentiment, because her eyes rove over you. Seeing the dirt sunk into your skin, the ruffled appearance of your clothes, the bags underneath your eyes, the frizz of your hair barely contained in a messy bun atop your head.

“You left last night.” It’s not a question, it’s an accurate observation. Joel’s the one to bring it to light and you only nod in agreement. The timing of this new potential trade relation and the passage of time since they had first approached the zone all coming together in their minds.

“Today is…”

“Yes.” You turn away from them, not wanting to talk about it. Never wanting to talk about it, the reason for your loneliness in a world that couldn’t care less.

You hear them exchange words quietly between themselves as you step away to gather your pack, shouldering it and beginning to lead the way to the path that had been outlined for you to approach the town on by those within in. After another mile, all three of your are on a dirt path that leads directly up to the fence. The figures of the men you had spent hours watching over are stood on the other side. But as you get closer, one of them shifts from blurry to start detail. He must recognize you at the same time, because his thick brows disappear into his hairline and his teeth glint in the sunlight as a smile takes over his face, relief and excitement colors the air. Breaking the tension that bathed every interaction in the time of now.

“Bill, she’s the one I told you about!”

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