#do you know how hard the family guy style is to replicate | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

courtney-deserved-better · 3 years

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whats ur writing schedule/process like! not in a “write faster” way, but i think once you mentioned writing in script form? and i like the way you wrote ur most recent fic! just curious bc ur works are just really good :)

this is a great question!!

if its not slippery slopes, ill usually get an idea for something and periodically jot down notes when they come to me until I feel like i have enough information to start writing (or if im just motivated), that's what i did for my horror challenge rewrite. and for stuff that's like... rewrites of an episode that aren't as character-focused as slippery slopes, i usually read the episode transcripts and try to replicate that total drama style with my own writing

for shorter oneshots, i usually just get a vague idea and run with it until i find a good ending spot, then i go back and clean it up a bit so the structure works

slippery slopes is an... interesting cycle. chapters are getting long enough that i cant just write them in one sitting any more (i think ch5 was the last chapter i did that for) and instead ill agonize over the beginning (always the hardest part to write for me) but once i get going with that i usually finish the chapter within a few days. then i reread the previous chapter to make sure it flows ok (and there aren't any contradictions) and then ill give myself a break where i dont do anything total drama related before coming back to edit and post. though before I do all that I type up notes and rough dialogue bits

and then once i post it it's like... a weight off my chest? like ive been purged or something?? idk its a weird sensation but im just like i Physically Cannot Write Anything For This Right Now and i don't start on the next chapter until that goes away. and then i either start the beginning and do nothing for a week before going back and finishing the chapter or i go into a manic state and write nonstop for a few days. right now i haven't reached a point where im ready to begin writing chapter 10 but i have a lot of notes for it.

(also as soon as i finish posting a chapter i try not to go on my laptop for like 12 hours so i don't obsessively refresh my email for comments. i love reading comments so much holy shit. please comment guys it makes fic authors feel so happy we will love you for it)

as for scripts: i am working on being a writer professionally, but specifically a playwright. writing in a script format comes more naturally to me than writing prose. funnily enough, i started posting fanfic just to practice my prose (and fix stuff in cobra kai that i didnt like) but things sort of... ended up here? idk man but im enjoying it.

right, so because writing in a script format is easier when im really struggling with a section in a fic ill usually scrap whatever i had and write it like a script, then translate that into prose. i was very excited to write the family videos for chapter 9 of slippery slopes, but i was Having Issues, so i redid it as a script and then rewrote that as prose. ill put the script version under the cut if you're interested in that.

but thank you so much for the question!! i do think my writing process is a bit unconventional but hey i think things are turning out well! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in!!

ok here is the last scene of ch 9 of slippery slopes in script format:

[SIERRA]

MOM: Hi honey! Omigosh this is so exciting! I bet you’re having such a great time! Especially since Chris is there! Is Chris watching this? Hi Chris! You know, I loooved you on that ice skating show. Your hair was fantastic! Well, it always is, haha. Do you really make your own hair gel? I’ve been trying to perfect the recipe but you’re just so hard to track down! Oh, you’re such a funny guy! I laughed sooo hard when you made all those jokes about marrying Chef.

Chef: hey!

Chris: ok just for the record, I wasn’t joking, we are married, Sierra tell your mom we’re married

Sierra: …can we just turn it off please

[COURTNEY]

DAD: Courtney, sayang, I know you’ve been going through a lot right now—

MOM: So you’d BETTER make it count. You’ve made it this far before, I want to see you getting all the way to the finale this time. And winning it. Enough moping about those hideous, good-for-nothing slackers! That’s what you get for hanging around freaks like them. You’re doing this for the million, now get the million. Is that clear?

ZARINA: And kick ass!

DAD: Zarina!

Video cuts out.

Alejandro: courtney you good?

Courtney: no, she’s right. Mama didn’t raise no quitter

Alejandro: [knows she’s still upset about duncan and gwen]

[ALEJANDRO]

MOM: Hola, Alejandro. We hope you are doing well, especially in such unsavory conditions. I’m glad to see you’ve made it to the final four— we expected nothing less, of course.

DAD: You have been utilizing your skills quite well. Though I wish you hadn’t been so… blatant about it. You’ll have to work twice as hard once this is over to convince people you’re trustworthy. But surely you were aware of that going into this… odd endeavor. That’s just politics. Reputation is everything.

JOSE: [snorts] Oh, and what a reputation you have, Al. I could easily compile hours of footage of your failures, but I, unlike you, do not waste my time on the frivolities of reality television. Though you always have been lacking in taste. Especially with that bratty girlfriend of yours— oh, my mistake, aren’t you dating the whiny weakling? It’s so hard to keep track! [laughs]

Alejandro: callate!

MOM: I’m sure Alejandro is just working an angle on them.

DAD: Whatever the case is, do not disappoint us.

[NOAH]

MOM: Hi Noah, I’m sorry, I don’t have time to record a full video, but I’m proud of you! Here are your sisters!

ISWARI: A million dollars? A million [bleep] dollars? Win it, Noah! Win it!

RUTH: Dude!! This is crazy! I know you can do this— good luck! Ark misses you! [holds up Ark who barks]

MARA: Are you insane? Why aren’t you dating Alejandro already?

Noah: shut up, mara, just because you can’t keep a boyfriend—

ANYA: Don’t let ‘em trick you! No mercy! Crush their skulls if you have to— no, wait, you’re not strong enough for that. We’ll get there!

LIYA: I say this as your sister, someone who loves you but is constantly annoyed by you— for someone who is quite literally a genius, you sure can be an idiot sometimes.

BALLARI: Okay, I literally have no idea how you’ve made it this far without an athletic bone in your body— are we sure you aren’t adopted? I’m kidding

ABS: You’re stubborn as hell when it comes to me, so you better be stubborn as hell when it comes to winning! And when you do win, get me a frozen yogurt machine, will you? I promise I won’t make you rock climb again!

JAEL: If you lose this, I’ll kill you with this racket. And then use your guts to make myself a new racket. So don’t fuck it up. Again.

Noah: [frozen, ashamed]

Sierra: well that was a mess

Courtney: ok show of hands, who felt better after hearing that? [no one raises hands]

Chris: yeah I was expecting this to be a lot more heartwarming…

Chef: chris just look at them. If they had stable home lives they wouldn’t be doing reality tv

Alejandro: can we please stop talking about this. Also aren’t you supposed to be flying the plane

Chef: oh fuck

Chris: yeah sure. I think im gonna call my mom

Everyone: …

Noah: ok so that was really shitty. Why dont we all go to first class and try and ignore our problems

Everyone: yeah ok sounds good

***

Courtney: so that sucked

Alejandro: at least your dad seems ok

Courtney: true. What are your guys dads like

Noah and Sierra: bold of you to assume I know my dad. Jinx

***

Alejandro: that last girl… you mentioned a sister who does tennis and hates you

Noah: yep

Alejandro: why?

Noah: none of your business. but… it is pretty justified

#slippery slopes #ask #anon #total drama #writing #fic #my fic

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jgvfhl · 3 years

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Help I can't stop--

--writing little fics that all involve saving Fives and sometimes other people and then just having Domino hugs at the end. so. yeah. This one has Tup in it! And an Ao3 link~

no warnings ^_^ about 6400 words, very fluffy by the end

Tup liked the busier nights at work, which he hadn’t quite expected. Bartending was a lot more pressure than working behind the scenes--washing dishes or prepping food before the night started--but Tup honestly liked it. Maybe it was his military training rising to the constant stream of orders and people and voices, or maybe he just liked the other bartenders better than the kitchen staff. Whatever it was, tonight was looking to be one of the busiest that week, and Tup only found happy anticipation to meet it.

Maybe a part of it was bartending meant he didn’t have Fives constantly over his shoulder, watching his every move to make sure he didn’t blow their cover or something. After over eight months here, eight months of considerable safety, he still hadn’t relaxed. The only reason Tup was “allowed” behind the bar in front of the customers was the cantina’s owner, Mira. She was the only reason either of them were alive after literally washing up on her doorstep during flood season, so she held some sway. She’d given them beds, meals, she’d never once threatened to turn them in for desertion--all for the requirement they help the aging weequay with her business, the Mirage cantina and inn. They would be fools to refuse, and if that meant Tup was up front, he went up front.

He still worried, naturally. Not so much about the GAR finding them anymore, not so much about the Jedi coming after him, not so much about how each day would end, those fears had largely subsided. Mostly, he worried about his brothers. Fives had explained the chips to him, as much as he knew. It had been a chilling revelation, and it still gnawed at both of their minds, despite having theirs removed. It was constant knowledge that each of his brothers had a ticking time bomb stowed in the back of their brain, just waiting to turn them all against the very people they were built to serve. Fives had sent an encrypted comm to the first person he thought might know how to help: Kix. Hopefully the medic would be prudent with the little knowledge Fives had sent, and hopefully he would know to keep it a damn secret until something concrete could be done about it.

Despite this--despite all of this--Tup had to leave it be. This little riverside town in the far outer rim rarely got news of the war unless battles approached, and just about no mention of Corusanti or Republic politics at all. He had no way to know what was happening. He had no way to affect what was happening. He had to leave it be. Tonight was busy enough without adding the small chaos of his own inner thoughts.

Fives had yet to accept this. Fives… Tup had been serving with Fives for almost a year now. He’d been through plenty of battles with him, hell, he’d survived Umbara with Fives. Fives had a way of… condensing his personality on the field, a way of putting the softer and more vulnerable parts of himself carefully away into some safebox behind walls to protect it from whatever he saw or did in the heat of war. But, afterwards, the old jokes and friendly punches came back in full force, usually helping everyone relax after the battle.

Fives hadn’t taken that safebox out yet.

In fact, Tup wasn’t sure Fives had escaped Ringo Vinda yet. He still saw the same guarded expressions, the same sharp, scrutinizing stare from the field. Maybe it was Tup’s “youth” showing. Shininess. But it had been over eight months since they’d escaped Kamino, and well over six since they’d faced any real danger. Fives couldn’t keep those walls up forever, could he?

Tup couldn’t really remember the last time he’d heard him laugh.

“You got everything you need over there?”

Tup pulled his mind back to his job. “Yeah, thanks, Dan,” he turned to his co-worker over his shoulder. Danula was Mira’s granddaughter, and definitely Tup’s favorite to work with out of the other bartenders. They got along famously--the first nattie friend he’d ever had.

“Looked a little lost in thought,” she replied. “Can’t have that on a busy night, you know?”

“Yeah, ‘course not,” Tup nodded, already moving to refill a pair of glasses. Service with a smile. Wasn’t that one of General Fisto’s mottos? He could have sworn he’d heard it from one of Commander Monnk’s men. Maybe in the same conversation about eating raw seafood like it was okay (which it wasn’t, it was disgusting). At least on a drier planet, he didn’t have that to bother him.

Tup caught sight of one of the regulars making his way through the crowded cantina. He glanced over his shoulder again at Dan, who was now at the other side of the circular bar. She’d be happy to see him.

“Hey, Carreth, good to see you,” Tup greeted the weequay who had arrived.

“Minnow--” Tup’s cover name, part of the precautions of desertion-- “a busy night, I see,” he smiled, craning his neck to catch a glance at Dan behind Tup. Mira and everyone who worked at the cantina knew about Carreth’s crush on Dan. Mira was fine with it, Dan’s parents were fine with it. Dan… had literally only figured it out last week. She was warming quickly to it, though. Carreth was nice, and frankly, too far gone to do anything stupid.

“Yeah, Mirage is a popular place this week,” Tup answered. “I’ll grab Dan for you.”

“Ah--I should tell you,” Carreth said, raising a hand and leaning in. “I noticed a group of your ah… family in town. They might make an appearance.”

Brothers. Tup paused, putting down the bottle of rum he’d pulled for Carreth. “How many? Can you tell me the color of their armor?”

“Kind of… black and red?” Carreth answered, tapping a finger on his chin between two horns. “Only five of them.”

Black and red? Odd. But he just nodded, casting an eye towards the doors. “Thanks for the heads up.” He filled a glass of Carreth’s preferred Corellian rum and left the bottle, then turned to get Dan.

He nearly bowled her over instead, only catching himself with half a second to spare. “Whoa! Hey, sorry--”

“Clones--at the door,” she said at the same time.

He looked. Well. He’d be hard-pressed to miss the guy who looked more Alpha-class than CT, which was more than a little worrying. But he didn’t recognize the armor at all. It didn’t even look regulation. Who were these guys?

“Okay, okay, yeah,” he said, seeing the new arrivals had put Dan on edge almost more than they had him. “Carreth just told me, he’s over there.”

“He did--wait, when--oh.” He turned her around and gave her a gentle push towards her admirer.

“Don’t worry about me, okay?” Force, he was happy Fives had the night off. He would have dragged Tup out of the bar and upstairs to their room before Carreth had finished the warning.

Tup stood his ground, now switched places with Dan on the bar. He kept an eye on the squad of five, watching carefully as they found a table on the edge of the room, then even more carefully as two of them made their way up to the bar in the center of the room.

Dan--Maker bless her--nearly gave up Carreth’s winning smiles to take their orders, but Tup wanted to find out exactly what they were doing here. He waved his hand at her, urging her back to her station.

The two men did stop and stare when he faced them over the bar. “What can I do for you?”

He used their pause to get a better look at them. The one on the left had long dark curls held out of his face by a red bandana with a small skull visible on one side of it. Speaking of skulls, it must have been their squad symbol, because half a skull was tattooed in black over the left side of his face, and the design was replicated in white on the helmet under his arm. The other, Tup had to do a double take, only because he’d never seen a clone with… studs? Ports? Metal… things implanted into his head, clearly visible because of his close haircut. Another quick glance caught the glint of cybernetic metal for a right hand. This guy had seen some things.

“Hi,” the first clone said, a little hesitant.

“This is a surprise,” the other said, a bit more confident. “Pleasant one, I guess.”

Tup shrugged. “As long as you’re not gonna get me in trouble, there won’t be any unpleasant ones.”

The second clone smiled and nodded. “I think some drinks and credits are all that need to change hands here.”

Tup liked this guy. Or at least respected him. “I can do that.”

The tattooed clone rattled off the orders in a way that said these were regular drink requests from the squad.

As he busied himself pulling out five glasses for them, the second clone asked, “Is that a tattoo there?”

Tup looked up to see his head tilted curiously, left hand pointing under his own right eye. “Uh… yeah.” He’d used to keep the teardrop tattoo covered, either a bandage or makeup when Dan could help him, but he’d been leaving it bare lately. Abruptly, Tup was aware that his looks hadn’t changed that much since Ringo Vinda. His hair was still long enough to keep in a bun, and the only difference was the shaved right side of his head where the chip had been removed. He hadn’t wanted to shave his whole head to start over, and he kind of liked the new look. But he still looked a lot like… well. Himself.

“I served with a brother with a mark like that, just looks familiar,” the clone said.

Small talk, clone style. Tup could do this. “Yeah, what was he like? Or is like.”

The other shrugged. “Kinda quiet, pretty nice kid. Didn’t know him for that long before…” He rubbed his head. “Well. Before a few incidents.” Tup could only imagine. “Never found out what happened to him, though. Guess he ran off before I got out.”

His squadmate turned a raised brow on him. “This the one your batcher dragged off about the…” He glanced at Tup. “The thing?”

Tup tried not to stare too pointedly as he finished off the third drink and moved on to the last two--the more complicated orders of the group. That sounded an awful lot like Fives talking about the chips.

“Yeah, that’s the one. Tup.”

He was rather proud of himself for not losing focus and completely ruining the cocktail by adding about three times the vodka needed by freezing up while pouring. But also who the ever-loving kriff were these guys? He started running through what the bandana-ed clone had just said. Unfortunately, he was stopped mid-review by the other one interrupting his thoughts.

“Hey, that reminds me. Can I ask something?”

Tup carefully finished the drink at hand and nodded, now kind of wishing he’d let Dan handle this. “Sure.”

“You haven’t seen any other clones since you… left, have you?”

“No, don’t think so.” Technically not a lie. He and Fives hadn’t seen any others since deserting. But, he could no longer avoid the obvious question of his own. “Can I--um… what do I call you?”

“Echo.”

Well. Tup was pretty sure there would only be one Echo who knew his name and might even be looking for him. There was only, of course, the small hurdle of his supposed death about… a year and, what--five months ago? But that might be the “incidents” he had mentioned earlier, and of course, it would explain his mention of the batchmate Tup had disappeared with.

Fives.

“Give me a minute,” he said, and hurried over to Dan across the way.

She must have been hyper-aware of the little conversation, because she had turned around before he made it to her. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, nothing, I promise,” he said. “I just need you to fill in for a few minutes, there’s something I need to take care of, then I’ll be right back, okay?”

“What?”

“Just--” He floundered a moment, debating how much to tell her. “I know one of them. He’s Blue’s best friend--like best best friend--they haven’t seen each other in a year, longer than that.” He put his hands on her shoulders. “Please, they need to talk to each other, I just need to bring him upstairs, okay? Nothing’s wrong.”

Her eyes narrowed at him, her already lined skin gaining more furrows. But, eventually, she nodded, shooing him away with her hands. “Fine, but I’m not finishing this shift on my own.”

“I’ll be back,” he promised again, moving to the little door in the circular bar. He weaved his way around customers to Echo. “Hi, I’ll start over,” he began, speaking just loud enough to be heard over the music. “I’m Tup, Fives is upstairs, I’m taking you to him, okay? Cool.”

Without waiting for an answer (because it had to be yes), he grabbed Echo’s wrist and began tugging him through the throngs of people and around tables towards the “Employees Only” door that led upstairs. Echo didn’t protest. In fact, he didn’t even say much except to add to Tup’s many “excuse mes” and “thank yous” as they pushed through people to get to the stairs.

But once the door had swung back shut again, he pulled Tup up.

“What?”

Echo breathed a quiet laugh. “Hello to you too, Tup. Take a breath.”

Tup released his wrist and let him climb the stairs at his own pace. In doing so, he finally noticed Echo’s boots didn’t look quite right, and it took him several seconds to realize this was because there were no feet attached. The more he looked, he recognized cybernetics from at least the knees down on both legs. “Oh, sorry.” He wasn’t sure if he was apologizing for dragging Echo away or for not realizing what had changed.

“It’s okay.” He put a hand on Tup’s shoulder as they climbed. “How are you both? You and Fives.”

“I’m pretty good,” he answered, silently agonizing over the slower pace Echo had set. “Fives is uh…” He paused, trying to find words that wouldn’t alarm Echo too much. “He’s… been better?”

Echo raised a brow at him, hesitating a step before continuing at a slightly faster pace. “What do you mean?”

Tup sighed. “He’s… I dunno. It’s like he’s…” Words failed him again, and now they had reached the landing on the second floor. The room he and Fives shared was only five doors down. “It’s like he’s hollow, but he’s too full of too much at the same time. It’s why I didn’t want to wait for him to see you.”

Echo nodded, gesturing for Tup to lead on. “I understand. Probably wouldn’t have wanted to wait even if he was okay.”

A knot of anticipation was slowly tightening in Tup’s chest as they approached the door and Tup knocked. He knew Fives was here, and it was technically Tup’s room too, but Fives didn’t like surprises. Anymore, at least. This had to work. If there was anyone in the galaxy who could get Fives out of this person hell he’d put himself in, it was Echo, right? That was how it worked: Echo and Fives, Fives and Echo, the Domino twins, always. Tup wasn’t sure what he’d do if this didn’t work.

______

The first thing that struck Echo about the room was the clear division of lived-in disorder and absent organisation. The room itself was clearly meant for customers and had simply been repurposed to allow Fives and Tup to live there semi-permanently. There were two beds, a connected ‘fresher near the door, a table with two lamps between the beds--all the trappings of a typical (if low-end) motel. But the bed farthest from the door remained impeccably made up in military fashion, there were no personal belongings out that weren’t currently in use, not even a stray sock. It was a CO’s dream, sure, but…

He looked at the other bed--Tup’s bed. It was made, but not impeccably so. There were stray clothes in one corner, a datapad thrown on the covers, little knickknacks on the table beside it. It looked lived in. Tup had claimed this space, a while ago, from the looks of it. Echo remembered the state Fives’ bunk had been in sometimes, the utter chaos happening below his own bunk. What had happened?

“Fives?” Tup stopped where the room widened out to their sleeping area, and Echo stopped behind him.

His batchmate was sitting cross-legged on his bed with a mouse droid in front of him in carefully disassembled pieces, next to a soldering kit and a datapad. He looked a bit like Tech at the moment, except for the distinct lack of goggles and the tank top and shorts.

But it was definitely Fives. Same little tattoo on his temple, same stupid goatee on his chin.

“What’s wrong?” Fives asked, not looking up from the mouse droid’s guts. Echo frowned a little. Tup hadn’t been exaggerating. He sounded… flat.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Tup answered. “There’s someone you should see, is all.”

That made Fives look up, and his reaction was instantaneous. He shoved the soldering iron into its holder with one hand while the other found a blaster pistol that had been hidden behind his body on the bed and raised it at Echo. “Who the hell is that?” he growled in a voice Echo had only ever associated with battle. The voice alone was enough to set him on edge, like Fives had just given a warning of enemy incoming and hadn’t just pointed his blaster at him.

“It’s Echo!” Tup shot back, stepping more fully in front of him--between him and the blaster. “Fives, it’s Echo. Maker’s sake, put the blaster down.”

“Echo’s dead, and people lie,” Fives replied in the same stern voice as he rose from the bed to stand at its foot. “Get away from him.” The pistol never wavered, true to ARC standards.

Echo knew he was unrecognizable. When he’d arrived at the RMB on Anaxes after being rescued from Skako Minor, it had been painfully obvious just how much he didn’t look like himself from the way that Jesse and Kix and Hardcase and the others had reacted. Now, with a different haircut, and metal limbs, and no handprint of any kind on his armor, it wasn’t exactly a surprise that Fives didn’t believe it was him. But it still hurt like something vital had just crumpled inside his chest.

“Fives!” There was a note of desperation in Tup’s voice now. How long had they been living like this? Echo remembered the urgency with which Tup had dragged him up here, not even bothering to find out what they were doing here, or if they were a threat to their safety. A while, then.

“Get. Away.”

“No! This is ridiculous!”

“You can scan my wrist if you want,” Echo cut in, holding up his remaining arm. “ID tattoo.” The subdermal pattern of invisible ink would pull up his public military record on any device, displaying his designation and current and previous stations.

This made Fives pause, actually thinking about it.

“Please, Fives?” Tup asked.

After a tense moment, Fives exhaled sharply through his nose, which meant he had relented. He pointed towards a dresser with his free hand. “Fine, grab the scanner.”

Tup took a step forward, then paused to ask, “You’re not gonna shoot him, right?”

A muscle in Fives’ jaw flexed. “I’m not gonna shoot him.”

Tup still moved cautiously, keeping a close eye on Fives as he left his position between Echo and the blaster aimed at him. For his part, Echo slowly moved to take off his vambrace and glove on his left hand, then pulling up the sleeve of his blacks a few inches. Tup stood in front of the dresser between them, fiddling with the handheld scanner.

“Do you wanna do this?” he said to Fives, sounding… tired. Poor kid.

Fives shook his head. “You do it.” It was the gentlest his voice had sounded since they’d walked in. It gave Echo some hope. If Fives could still care this much about keeping Tup safe, the rest of him was still in there. It was just a little buried.

Tup walked over and he held out his wrist for him. The scanner sort of… tickled a bit, after being part of a computer for several months with the Techno Union. It seemed whatever they did to him had made him a bit more sensitive to the electromagnetic spectrum. The stripes of the ID tattoo lit up blue briefly as the device picked them up, and there was a soft beep when it finished.

“Sorry about this,” Tup murmured while the device was processing.

“Don’t, it’s not your fault,” Echo replied with a small smile.

He returned to Fives, holding out the device as a hologram display appeared from it:

ARC-1409

Formerly 501 Legion, Torrent Co

MIA: [unavailable]

POW retrieved from [unavailable] by Gen. Anakin Skywalker, CT-7567, CF99

Reassigned to CF99

It was different than the one Echo had seen, because the GAR devices and droids could pull up his full record, dates included, but it had the important stuff. Echo skimmed the short document, then watched Fives read it through. He saw his batchmate’s eyes hover on the picture in the upper left corner, taken about a month after his rescue. He looked much better now than in that picture. Fives read it through twice, and after the second time through, he reached out and took the device from Tup. The arm holding the pistol lowered its aim from Echo’s head to his feet.

“I have a shift to finish,” Tup said, stepping away once the scanner was out of his hands. “Don’t kill each other while I’m gone.”

Fives didn’t respond, just watched Tup turn and leave.

And that left the two of them alone.

For a moment or two, they didn’t move. Fives seemed lost in thought after reading the document, and Echo didn’t want to startle him. Eventually, he clicked the device off and set it down on top of the dresser, the arm with the blaster now hanging loose at his side.

“How did you find us?” he asked quietly, still facing the dresser. His voice was still unreadable to the inexperienced ear, but Echo could hear a difference. He was still wary. But he wasn’t actively threatening him, and that was a distinct improvement.

“Accident,” Echo replied truthfully. “We needed to stop for fuel after a mission, and the boys wanted a drink, so…” He figured the rest of the story was self-explanatory. When Fives didn’t follow with another question, he added, “Do you believe it’s me now?”

Fives’ empty hand slowly curled into a fist on top of the dresser, then slowly relaxed. “I think so,” he answered.

“Can I ask you to put the blaster down?”

His batchmate looked down at the weapon, like he’d only just noticed it. After another moment of thought, he set it down beside the scanner, then finally looked up at Echo. “What happened to you?”

He shrugged. He was used to people staring at him by now, with all his machinery, and even more used to that question. “An explosion and a few mad scientists.” He took a step towards Fives, encouraged when he made no move for the blaster in response. “The Seppies handed me over to the Techno Union after they pulled me out of The Citadel.” He gestured to his legs and head with his prosthetic hand. “They did all this.”

“Why?”

Echo took another step towards him, scrutinizing his face for the tells and signs he had grown up learning. Even ARC training couldn’t hide it all from him, so despite the emotionless front Fives had put up--and had had on since Echo had walked in, he could tell a few things. Most glaringly, he was exhausted. Beyond exhausted, in some aspects. Clearly, he hadn’t been sleeping well, if at all, for days at a time, if the shadows under his eyes were anything to go by.

“To get the strategic algorithm,” he answered, keeping his voice soft and even, giving no signs he could see how bad Fives looked. “The one I made with Rex. I guess they were using it on Anaxes about two and a half months after you and Tup left. Rex recognized it, and that’s how they found me.” Fives nodded. He looked numb behind the exhaustion. He rubbed his face roughly, and Echo took another couple steps forward. “No one’s coming after you, Fives.”

He watched his shoulders tense, hands still over his face.

“I mean it. The stuff you sent to Kix about the chips--you did the right thing. We’ve figured a lot of it out, we know Tup wasn’t in control of himself on Ringo Vinda. We know someone set this whole thing up. No one is coming after you, I promise.”

Slowly, Fives’ hands lowered from his face, and Echo’s heart leapt. Finally, he could see something in his eyes. They were no longer forcefully void of emotion, guarded by walls built during ARC training. It would have made Echo smile, if what he saw hadn’t been such overwhelming loneliness. It made sense now that Tup had described a kind of hollowness. If he’d seen something like it before Citadel, he would have wasted no time dragging his brother into a hug and not letting go until he felt the stress ease from his muscles. But then was not now. Fives was hurting, yes. But Echo had to be patient.

He stayed put as Fives moved again, this time over to the foot of the bed to sit on the floor, leaning back against the bedframe. Drained. “Is Tup mad at me?”

Echo did smile then, a small smile, and a little sad. “Oh, Fives,” he sighed.

Fives, always loyal to his brothers first, and the Republic second. Fives, who had always hated being left alone for any amount of time, no matter how brief. Fives, who had always spent extra time with the shinies after their first battles to make sure they took care of themselves. Fives, who had sensed the chips ran deeper than first thought, and risked his life gathering what he could to save his brothers. Fives, who had suddenly found himself without anyone, except Tup, and had done everything in his power to keep his little brother safe, no matter what it would do to him.

“No, I don’t think he’s mad at you,” he finally said, walking the few steps over until he was standing to Fives’ left. “A little frustrated you did this to yourself, maybe. But not angry.” He gestured to the floor next to his brother. “Can I sit?”

Fives nodded, barely a dip of the chin. “I just wanted to keep him safe,” he said in a very small voice.

“You did,” Echo told him as he sat down next to him, but facing towards him. “You did a great job. No one even thought to look here, no one had any idea where you two had gone.” He set down his glove and his vambrace that he’d been carrying since taking them off. Then he started taking off the rest of the armor on his arm, setting it all in a pile off to his far side.

Fives watched him, curious, but he didn’t say anything about it. Instead, he wanted to know, “What did you find out about the chips?”

Echo frowned as he unclipped the sides of his chest plate and pulled the whole thing over his head. He wanted Fives to relax, to let go of the stress he’d been carrying. Talking about what they’d discovered, and what they had yet to figure out, would just get him thinking again. “Do I have to tell you now?” When Fives’ only response was dropping his gaze to the floor between his feet with a minuscule shrug, Echo elaborated. “Fives, as your batchmate, let me say this: you are dead tired. You look like you’ve been running on fumes--mentally and emotionally, if not physically--for about two weeks. Kix would scrape the medic symbol off his shoulder bell if he let you go anywhere in this state. I would rather wait until tomorrow, so I can make sure you get a good night’s rest and some breakfast, and then I will tell you and Tup everything. Okay?”

Fives knew he was right. Echo knew that he knew he was right. He drew his knees up to his chest and rubbed his face again. “Okay,” he sighed, but he didn’t look happy about it.

Echo smiled again. “You know you missed my nagging,” he said, holding out his hand.

To his utter delight, the corners of Fives’ mouth pulled up ever so slightly. He put out his hand, hesitated a little, but finally let it land in Echo’s. “Yeah, I did,” he agreed, linking their thumbs and holding tight. He let his head fall back against the mattress behind him, avoiding his brother’s gaze, but Echo’s trained eye saw the muscles in his neck constrict, saw the small stutter in his breathing, and he already knew.

“Looks like rain, huh?” he said quietly, squeezing his brother’s hand. It was an old code from Domino’s cadet days. They had all been so damn stubborn, none of them had wanted to admit when they needed a good cry. So, they had used Kamino’s weather as a cover. Fives and Echo had kept it up, even when it no longer made sense on a ship in the middle of hyperspace, for example.

Fives shut his eyes tightly and nodded, squeezing his hand in return.

“C’mere.”

He uncurled from where he sat against the bed and let Echo gather him up in his arms, holding him against his unarmored chest--because he had been pretty sure it would end up like this. Fives pressed his face into his left shoulder immediately, wrapping both arms around his torso and digging his fingers into his blacks. Echo rested his chin on his brother’s hair and put his hand on the back of his neck, holding him there while he unraveled.

How long had it been since he had seen his last batchmate? Something approaching two years at this point. Echo hugged tighter upon remembering that, and upon remembering what it had been like trying to put his life back together after the Techno Union without him. He was determined to keep Fives from going through anything like it now, even if this reunion was far from what he might have imagined.

After some time Echo didn’t bother to track, he felt Fives settle in his arms and heard his breathing descend to a more normal pace. He pressed a kiss to his head and ruffled his hair. As much as he hated hearing Fives cry, this was light years better than the calculating and emotionless man who’d had a blaster pointed at him a few minutes ago. It hurt, yes, but it was human. If it made Echo’s heart twinge a little, it was worth it to know this was normal.

“Feel better?” he murmured. Fives nodded silently, loosening his death-grip on his brother’s blacks. “Can we get off the floor now? My knees aren’t what they used to be.”

The noise Fives made was somewhere between a sob and a cough as he sat up from where he’d been slumped against Echo’s chest. But he was smiling, weakly, so it must have been a laugh. “Yeah, okay.”

Echo helped him wipe away a few stray tears. “You’re a kriffing mess, brother,” he smirked. “Maybe you can get some sleep until Tup’s shift ends, hm?”

“You’re staying, yeah?”

“Of course I’m staying,” he assured him, a little affronted he would think otherwise. Fives nodded, letting his head fall forward until their foreheads touched. Echo leaned in and felt a shaky breath of relief leave his lips.

“I really need a drink.”

Echo sat up with a smile. “You and me both, but I think sleep will be better for you.”

______

It was a little after midnight by the time Tup had finished his shift and he was climbing the stairs to his room again, this time with three beers in his hands, because he felt bad about whisking Echo off without filling his order. Echo’s new squad was still downstairs. He’d explained what had happened to them, and they had all been surprisingly accepting of it. Echo must have told them about Fives.

He hesitated in front of his door, one hand on the handle. He couldn’t hear anything from inside, which… was probably good, right? They’d had over two hours to themselves. Either they’d settled things, or they’d stunned each other. Well. He pushed the door open, knocking on it lightly as he did so.

“Hey, guys, I’m back.” He walked softly until he was in the main part of the room, then he smiled.

Echo and Fives were laid out on Fives’ bed, the latter tucked safely under his batchmate’s arm. It was the first time Tup had actually seen Fives asleep in weeks. Usually, he was still up when Tup went to bed, and awake before Tup got up. It was also the first time in months Fives had willingly put himself in contact with another person. He noticed Echo’s full kit was piled at the foot of the bed, along… along with his legs, yes. He was still getting used to that.

Echo was blinking sleepily when Tup walked in. “Hey, Tup,” he smiled. “Those for us?”

Tup held up the three bottles. “Yeah. I… felt kinda bad you didn’t get your drink earlier.”

Echo nodded. “Oh, it’s alright. But, I will certainly take that drink now, as soon as I get this lump off my arm.” He waved the hand attached to the arm Fives had pinned down.

Tup walked over and sat down on the end of the bed where Echo’s feet weren’t. “I’m glad he’s asleep.”

“Yeah, me too,” his older brother agreed, rubbing Fives’ shoulder. “But, I said I’d wake him up when you came back.” He patted Fives’ shoulder a bit more aggressively. “Come on, brother.”

It took a while, but it worked eventually. Fives grumbled quietly, at first shoving his face deeper into the pillows before Echo dragged his arm out from under him, then he hauled himself upright. Echo similarly pushed himself up, leaning against his brother.

“Hey, Fives,” Tup said, still a little uncertain.

Fives rubbed his eyes, then blinked groggily at him. Echo ruffled his hair roughly to help him wake up, and a tiny smile appeared on his face. A real one, too, not one of the tight, professional smiles Tup had seen him use in the past. “Hey, Tup.”

A huge smile lit up Tup’s face. Echo had done it. “That’s more like it,” he said triumphantly.

“Yeah, I know,” Fives said, looking a bit sheepish, which was awesome, because Tup hadn’t seen many emotions out of him other than a range of unhappy in way too long. “Sorry about… everything.”

Tup’s smile softened a bit. “Thank you. It’s okay--I mean, I’m glad you’re okay.”

He nodded back. “Yeah, well… we’re getting there.” His eyes landed on the drinks in Tup’s hand. Tup had picked out one he knew was a favorite. “Those aren’t being saved for any special occasion, are they?” he asked, gesturing to them.

Tup smirked and held them up. “Just this one,” he answered, and handed them out.

He was about to get up to get a bottle opener, then watched as Echo’s cybernetic hand plucked off the cap like it was nothing. Fives blinked at his batchmate’s open bottle, then held out his to open as well. Echo rolled his eyes, but obliged. Fives smiled again, clinking their bottles together before taking a swig.

Echo held out his hand to Tup, whose bottle remained unopened. “It’s the most hand-like thing this thing can do, please,” he urged, so Tup held out his bottle and let him open it.

Then Fives scooched back to sit against the headboard and gestured Tup over as well. “C’mere,” he said, “I’ve been a dick to you, I should start making it up.”

Tup gave another huge grin and got up to get on the other side of the bed. “Good to have you back,” he said, maybe a little smug, as he kicked off his shoes and carefully climbed in so he didn’t spill his drink.

“Glad to be here,” Fives said, putting an arm around Tup’s neck and tapping their foreheads together lightly. “Good on you for bringing in the heavy artillery,” he added, gesturing with his bottle to Echo on his other side.

Tup could only give a nonverbal sound in reply as he took a drink. Then he sighed contentedly and relaxed against Fives’ side. He hadn’t quite realized how much stress he had been carrying because of Fives, and it was all leaving him in a rush, like he’d just taken off his kit after a twelve-hour march. He felt light, and happy, and safe. And hopefully, it wouldn’t be too long before they could really go home, and he could see the rest of his brothers. The thought made him smile as he listened absently to Fives and Echo chat about nothing in particular. Yeah. This was good.

#looks long huh #my writing #my fanfic #tcw fanfic #i write things sometimes #arc trooper echo #arc trooper fives #clone trooper tup #fix it fic #domino twins #*cries in loving domino squad*#this au brought to you by:#EVERYONE IS FINE #userblossom

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discotreque · 3 years

Text

LwD 2.03: We’ll Always Have Tom Paris

I’ve lived in the same apartment for eight years now, and yesterday was the fifth catastrophic mechanical failure of the same bathroom toilet—all unrelated issues, too; this time it was the fill valve. At this point I don’t know whether to call a plumber or an exorcist… but anyway, it’s been kind of hard to focus on Star Trek! Ugh.

This week’s episode is credited to M. Willis, who I last encountered on She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, a show about which I wrote literally 100,000 words of fanfic last year, in between Picard and Lower Decks when I had no Star Trek to obsess over. Willis’s She-Ra episodes tended to be slightly off-format in execution, with big action set pieces, lots of characters in unexpected combinations, and usually an emotional game-changer of a climax—and her last credit on this show was “Much Ado About Boimler,” which obviously had all those elements too. She writes to her strengths!

Spoilers within:

If you need me, I’m going to be ugly-laughing about “Voy” for the rest of the day. (Wow, that does actually save a ton of time!)

SHAXS IS BACKXS!!!! The lower-deckers never knowing how or why a senior officer came back from the dead is a perfect microcosm of this show. I love that he still calls Rutherford “Baby Bear,” and I love the weird cosmic horror that LwD keeps sprinkling into the Star Trek universe. (What does that koala know?) I hope this doesn’t mean we’ve seen the last of Kayshon! His appearance on the bridge gives me hope we’ll get to keep both characters around.

Star Trek has always had fairly fuzzy world-building for the world outside Starfleet—understandable, since 99% of Star Trek takes place within Starfleet—but it’s been such a thrill to see LwD (and Picard) finally establish some in-universe pop culture that isn’t conveniently familiar to 20th- or 21st-century audiences. Like the Zebulon Sisters last season—a band that apparently does USO-style tours of Starfleet ships? Delightful. Kestra Troi-Riker having a t-shirt from a Sex Pistols cover band in Klingon? Fucking brilliant. Tendi bonding with the guy at the storage place over the “Klingon acid punk” playing from his little Bluetooth speaker? PUT IT IN MY VEINS.

They really put the character development in gear this week! I liked how we locked in a couple of things already established in extra-canonical material: Mariner’s bisexuality, which Mike McMahan mentioned in an interview last year, and Tendi’s given name, D’vana (which I was sure we’d heard on the show before, but I guess not?).

Speaking of Mariner’s love life, is human–Bynar dating just… by definition a threesome situation?

We learned a lot of new things about Tendi, though, and every single one makes her 10 times more interesting to me. Remember last season, when she said “many” Orions hadn’t been pirates or slavers “for over five years”? Is the implication that something happened in Orion culture—around the end of the Dominion War?—that led to Tendi (and presumably others) rejecting a life of crime and joining Starfleet? How long was she “the Mistress of Winter Constellations” before that—or is it more of an inherited title? I want more Tendi lore!!!!

(Speaking of Tendi’s life, another quick and confounding piece of information for my red-yarn “what the hell is up with Tendiford” theory board: Mariner asks if they’re dating and Tendi’s response is “Not really!” Not really? That’s not no, D’vana!)

This show continues to be a surprisingly conventional workplace sitcom underneath all the excellent Star Trek (and that’s not a bad thing, just a genre overlap that keeps falling out of the front of my mind). Boimler’s inability to use the computer hit way too close to home for me this week: a couple years ago, I returned to a job after a long-term leave of absence, during which time I’d been assigned to a new manager—who’d never had an employee return from long-term leave before, so he didn’t know what to do beforehand—so I spent my first day back just chilling at my desk, fucking around on my phone, because there was literally nothing else I could do without logging into the system first. Too real!

Something we’ve seen in this show that I’m not sure we’ve seen before w/r/t the food replicators is somebody putting a tray of food into the replicator to add more food on top of it—in this case Shaxs getting spicy kiwi ketchup (?!) on a hot dog he seems to have already replicated. (He couldn’t have asked for “hot dog, with spicy kiwi ketchup” in the first place? This is haunting me worse than him coming back from the dead.)

As a certified cat lady, the T’Ana plotline—and its resolution—made me laugh until I couldn’t breathe (unless that was the toxoplasmosis). I should have seen it coming, but I was too distracted by the second-hand embarrassment of them breaking “Jeremy” (and the completely unprecedented Star Trek plot of a doctor getting off on her grandmother’s family heirloom…).

Miscellany:

Jet offering to carry Boimler across the threshold of the door like a bride… am I going to ship THIS now?

Mariner interpreting Tendi’s “talk like a pirate!” in the same way a modern millennial would—“Arr, how ya be doin’ today, me fellow Orion?”—might have been my favourite dumb joke in the entire episode. (“I’m allergic to, uh, pheromones?”)

Tawny Newsome read the line about “only one name, like Odo!” in the script and apparently literally called Mike McMahan out of the blue to remind him that Odo’s name is short for “Odo’ital” and she didn’t want nitpicking nerds on her case. He told her the line was so funny he would accept the nitpicking, so don’t blame Tawny—she tried to warn him!

“There’s like, only a couple people in the quadrant who can say they got beat up by Tom Paris.” Is that a burn? I think that’s a burn.

Another banger of an episode. This show is more confident this season, and I’m loving it—and based on what I’ve heard from people who’ve seen the next two episodes, it only gets better from here. HYYYYYYYPE!!!!!!

See you next week—I’ve got to go fashion a toilet plunger into a crucifix, apparently.

#star trek #star trek lower decks #lower decks #lower decks spoilers #lwd spoilers #amy's episode notes

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kazumi404 · 2 years

Photo

I’m late, I know, but I really wanted to thank every single one who gave me a ko-fi in my most fragile moment.

Thanks to Rae(Mother Macabre) for helping me with this and for being by my side, she is my angel.

I’m late with this because I was working...as always.

It has been 3 years working non stop.

I don’t have time to invest in my personal projects anymore. I don’t play games, don’t chat with friends, can’t draw for myself... I can do nothing else nowadays, mostly because I’m always working nonstop.

As Rae mentioned, the economy over here is dark and chaotic. Unemployment and prices are skyrocketing since years ago... So, my only choices are to slave myself or to starve :/

This is really awful... I need to move to a new place but I’m having an increasing difficulty raising money for this... to deprive myself from my life made my depression reach its edge. No fun, almost no rest, just endless work in pieces of art that reflects nothing of me in it... I’m not even allowed to use my own style... I don’t even remember when it was the last time I used my creativity for something.

Yes, I DO LOVE my work with Rae because her style approaches a lot to what I REALLY enjoy to do.

I’m trying my best to keep my dream to be able to work creating my own stories.

I had this chance long ago. I was becoming bigger, numbers rising and some webcomics sites noticing me, but I just... I had no money and my family was starving and I was desperate, so I threw my dreams in the trash bin and started selling commissions, which became a downward spiral. Nowadays, no one even knows that I’m a horror/psychedelic artist. I’m just “the girl who replicates ghibli very well”

There is a mountain of ghibli pictures of happy families done by me. Meanwhile, my identity just vanished under it. Sorry for venting out... I’m just so tired...

All of your donations gave me a bit of hope again... I don’t know how to do it, but I don’t want to give up yet! It’s just that... its so hard to keep going.

But I’ll try to gain my space with my own creations. I need to be myself again, and not only the girl who draws ghibli to avoid starving.

I would be really happy if you all keep supporting me on this! And I’m not talking money. I know I need money to live, but following my works, giving me feedback... literally engaging with my work is a big help too!

I hope someday I will be able to stop with these commissions and live only from my own stories, and with these kofies there is a little hope back after many years. I can feel that there are people trying to support me on my journey.

Thanks a lot.

I can’t say “I’m cured” because I’m not, and probably I never will (All after all I still have to draw these commissions) but now things seems to be a bit different around me!

Thanks so much for all the support.

Thanks so much for every single message.

Thanks so much for being here for me when I needed.

I’ll try to post new things and update my ko-fi tiers

By the way, one last thing... lets try to play a game?

You guys give me a theme bellow and I’ll try to create a story with this, using my own style.

I can’t promise it will be fast since I have work to do, but can we try to have fun with this together? :)

I’ll be waiting for the suggestions!

See Ya! c:

[Post on Kofi]

#hidden #post #posts #kazumi takashi #kazumi 404 #doodle #thanks #kofi #ko-fi #donate #dream #kazumi

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vimbry · 3 years

Note

You have been prompted hit us with those ideas :)

so shockingly, it’s a yotsubato au idea. I hope that’s what was expected haha but um. I've just been thinking about mr yousuke koiwai actually being trans. and by extension the one who had yotsuba. :)

I’m being super indulgent here in that he is someeewhere on the non-binary spectrum. teetering on masc; presenting as masc, refers to himself in a masculine way for convenience because you know, explaining that identity to people is hard and potentially troublesome. it doesn’t really bother him, so long as it’s not his agab.

he’s stealth, of course. moving away to the suburbs with new people made this a hell of a lot easier. apart from with his immeadiate family, naturally. and jumbo, he’s aware too, cause they were friends from being little and it’d be pretty unavoidable. yanda isn’t; koiwai was already presenting as male by the time they met and it just never comes up. he prob never even makes much of an effort to have it be a secret around him, he’s just cis, naive, and oblivous lmao but he’s a good guy really.

the reason the name yousuke took so long to crop up in the series is because he spent a very long time choosing it. he’s not really encountered anyone in the past 5 months of the manga’s timeline who ever needs to know/use his given name, anyway. even his bestie settled on referring to him by his family name until he felt comfortable with one and now it’s sorta stuck.

despite his family’s general acceptance and support of koiwai, they don’t actually know that he’s yotsuba’s bio parent. they highly Suspected it, but they didn’t pry, and he wouldn’t tell, so they eventually pushed it out of mind as families will do with things and it became irrelevant. she was an adorable big hit with everyone when they eventually came back home anyway, so that was more the focus! altho I do like the idea of jumbo being the exception, how there’s some things you could tell your closest loyal friend but not your family. it might’ve just slipped out between them.

jumbo got caught off guard when ena asked him about yotsuba’s mother and came up with “oh she was uhhh abandoned. she doesn’t have one” on the spot, and koiwai just rolled with that when fuuka later asked about it. look he even stalls a sec while trying to think something up. :)

“(internally panicking and buffering) hahaha yea an orphan right jumbo’s such a jokester haha - it’s true tho”

as for her real origins, it’s as boring and simple as you’d expect from a character frequently described as casually irresponsible lmao. (nah I’ll cut him some slack. sometimes things can’t be avoided/you’re on T and think it’s an impossibility, easily done). you've had a lot of heavy projects to deal with, you find a local lgbt friendly hotspot to wind down in, you end up meeting someone, it happens all the time. so he got stuck somewhere overseas in some apartment "””working away””” a little longer than anticipated.

his age was confirmed in an interview with the creator as “very early 30s”, so this would put him in his mid-to-late 20s when yotsuba’s born. still a bit in flux with his identity, this definitely not helping. took a few years to get everything together and return to japan.

we all know the experience of navigating gender can sure be, difficult. koiwai’s still a relatively young guy, and like most people, is taking things each day at a time. so I’m also just gonna go ahead and use this au to overexplain the basic style-shifting in-universe as hormone treatment microdosing/trying out different ways to present as the months progress aha. I mean, he looks SO drastically different. I know a few of them do but man! that is 2 different guys.

(also why he has that little bit of stubble there in chapter 7 and never again. unfortunately discovered that he’s apparently very good at growing a beard. didn’t like it, not for him. shaving is one of the few things he will force himself to do often. thanks azuma for deciding to draw him unshaven once and then likely deciding it was too tedious to replicate in future chapters so I can take this n run with it).

yotsuba’s also unaware that she’s Not adopted because she’s 5 and would tell everyone lol. also koiwai’s built up these nerves and reluctance around sharing it. it’s one of his reasons for harshly reinforcing how she shouldn’t lie. he’s projecting in keeping an especially large one up around her himself, and he also wants to raise her to feel she can always be honest with him about anything. she’s probably told one day as she gets older anyway. I think it’d be cute if they ended up looking super alike. 🥺

anyway yes thank you that is my thoughts !

#long post #asks #trans pregnancy cw #implied anyway #yotsuba #HI wow sorry a lot idea spilled out can you tell I've been hyperfixatin creatin for a short while here #seriously thank you I love my long rants to be valiated in advance hahaha <3 #ngl even with canon adopted yotsuba I'm still gonna hc him as trans regardless lol #he just is #and because I'm in two minds I have an au of an au where his family Do know and flew out to spend time with him for a lil bit because sweet

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redqueen-hypothesis · 3 years

Text

duo dates ➳ mlqc

KIRO

⤞ visiting animal rescue shelters together

it’s obvious that kiro has quite the soft spot for furry animals from the sheer number of strays he’s picked off the streets one way or another. both amused and inspired by how excited he gets from being around apple box and cello, you decide to feature him in one of your documentaries about abandoned pets, allowing him to work with a rescue shelter for a day. you’ve never seen him so excited, giggles and delighted laughter falling freely from his mouth as puppies and kittens crawl over him, nosing and licking at every part of him. he gets very emotional when he hears about the number of animals that get abandoned and have to be euthanized once they stop being ‘cute’, and the staff lets out a collective sniff from behind the cameras when they see his own eyes filling with tears.

so, it’s no surprise when kiro decides to head back to the animal shelter on his own, and he invites you along with him too! the two of you become longtime volunteers at the shelter, and kiro absolutely loves the animals there (you’d jokingly told him that you’re jealous before, to which he showered you with loud kisses and ardent declarations of love until you were dying of embarrassment). he names all of the animals there with some of the weirdest names, like ‘triangle ears’ and ‘fur tail’, but tends to forget them and mix them up with each visit. will wear the animal mascot suit and stand outside to encourage volunteers to sign up, and gives monthly anonymous donations but the staff all know it’s him. he complains they only treat him extra nice during that time, but you know all the staff adore him (and honestly, who doesn’t, with that pure heart and bright smile?)

not afraid to get down and dirty with the animals! you and the rest of the staff watch with varying degrees of admiration (and horror) as he throws himself into the mud along with the animals, stealing squeaky toys and toy bones alike from right under their noses and running for his life as a pack of dogs chase him from behind. when kiro’s exhausted himself playing with them, he’ll come into the shade damp with sweat and immediately flop down with his head on your lap, pretending to snore loudly, although he really does fall asleep sometimes. refers to himself as the dad and you as the mom, and will sometimes tell the pups to ask you for permission to wolf down their dog chow. “it’s practice for taking care of our future family!” he insists, wrapping his arms around you right after he’s finished chasing the dogs in the rain. when you shake your head and ask him where on earth you’re going to find a family as chaotic as this, he slyly winks and says he wants as many kids as there are dogs in the shelter. you aim a kick at him.

GAVIN

⤞ learning self defense from him

it had started for a multitude of reasons. first of all, you had mentioned wanting to get into shape and shed some excess some way, and had been looking for a way to get fit quickly. secondly, there had been a stalker who had been following you home for a few nights when you left the office late, although that had been quickly put to an end when gavin came over to pick you up on a late night food run and promptly made the guy eat pavement. he’d been worried about you, and suggested learning a form of self defense in order to better protect yourself in case he wasn’t there. lastly, you wanted to see gavin sleeveless, sweaty and... yeah. that’s it. that’s the reason.

the first few lessons, you’re so distracted by that tight fitting black tank top and dear lord those arms and abs that you nearly get your nose broken by your dear teacher gavin, who panics for a good entire hour and won’t stop apologising. he suggests stopping the lessons, but you insist on continuing, determined to actually focus this time round (you can ogle his body another time when there isn’t a fist flying at your face). it starts off as a way to spend more time with gavin and allowing him to do what he likes at first, but then your competitive side quickly starts to take over and you find yourself becoming more and more interested in the sport itself. gavin never really goes very hard on you, but he isn’t an easy coach either. he works with you to improve your fitness levels, going to the gym with you, following you on your jogging rounds whenever you want him to, and letting you punch him all you want (your hands probably hurt more than his rock hard body does anyway).

your favourite part, though, is watching gavin truly sink into his element, because he looks extra hot when he’s in the fighting ring squaring off in a practice match against another opponent. there’s a calm, composed expression on his face, but his eyes shine with a dangerous light that remind you of a starving wolf. when he does go toe to toe with his opponent, you rarely have a second to blink before gavin’s already moving lightning quick to take his him down. it’s a side of him you rarely get to see since he’s always so sweet and tender with you, but you can’t help gushing to him about how sexy he is and watching as his ears burn bright red with barely suppressed (but pleased) embarrassment. in the fighting gym, you’re the only one who’s managed a takedown on him before so you’re somewhat of a legend, but you had played dirty, kissing him full on the mouth when he wasn’t expecting it and he had promptly frozen on the spot.

suffice to say no one else has dared to replicate the technique on him.

VICTOR

⤞ teaching him the ways of an arcade

he would have never agreed to this if he had known just how awful he was at these. victor li can conquer the financial business scene in less than five years straight out of college but can’t for the life of him pass a single level of dance off, much less win against a child less than half his age. he looks so... uncomfortable stepping into that noisy space playing all sorts of loud, upbeat music at once, ear splitting hollers from kids playing other games punctuating the mishmash of songs - it’s only then that you realise that victor has never, in his entire childhood, set foot into an arcade before.

you collect your card at the counter before dragging him to the racing games, sitting him firmly down in your seat before teaching him how to customise his own car. he would have spent hours doing this until you nudge him to the next section, the actual race, and that’s when he starts panicking in typical victor fashion, trying to act calm but asking all sorts of funny questions. demands to know what’s the difference in the game for auto and manual steering, protests repeatedly that “this isn’t how a car works”. it’s even more hilarious seeing him try out the dance games, in which he had faced off against a ten year old and promptly lost. it hurt his pride, but you had laughed so hard your face turned red, so maybe it’s worth it. but only a little bit. and he’s still not doing this again. awhile into the arcade he begins to relax a little and his competitive side starts to shine through, he’s no longer worried about looking like an idiot and instead puts his all into every single game. in fact, you find yourself increasingly distracted by that very endearing expression of focus on his face as he awkwardly tries to navigate his long legs according to the beat, and the childish excitement plain on his face when he finally passes a level makes you smile so hard your cheeks hurt.

at this point, he’s calling the claw machine a complete scam and is ready to sue the entire arcade chain when you’ve decided enough is enough and pull him from the arcade. the two of you end up cramped in a photobooth with your prizes, a totoro hood for him and a rabbit ear headband for you, and you keep the polaroids in your wallet ever since then. you don’t realise that he’s stolen one for himself, and now it sits buried deep in the drawer of his work desk where he looks at it secretly when you aren’t there.

LUCIEN

⤞ horror house/escape room to find his weakness

lucien’s practically unflappable in any situation, seemingly able to respond to any crisis or chaos with the same, serene smile. when you ask him what he’s afraid of, he gives you the same cheesy answer he always does: losing you is the only thing he’s fearful of (to which you just don’t stop blushing, no matter how many times he says it. is it the way he looks at you, or the way his voice just drops to a genuine, low whisper whenever he says it?) as such, you had challenged yourself to find out what his weaknesses were, and tried a variety of the strangest ideas on the internet such as sticking toy cockroaches in the kitchen, only to get terrified yourself at the sight of a forgotten dummy you’d left on the shelf and had nearly broken a cup in the process. after that, lucien had suggested taking your attempts out of the house instead - and thus, horror houses and escape rooms it was.

going to horror houses with lucien is probably the best and worst idea you’ve ever had. in terms of effectiveness of achieving your goal, it’s completely useless - even the most terrifying and renowned of horror houses have lucien walking out completely unfazed, or worse, carrying you in his arms bridal style because your legs are shaking too much to walk straight. the only upside to this is that when you’re terrified, you cling to lucien and he just whispers soothing words into your hair, explaining how the horror house uses mist and smoke dispensers here and there, how the lights change colour and where the actors hide. the poor actors have probably gotten tired of being repeatedly exposed and having to change positions, so many of the horror houses just give the two of you complementary coupons and beg you not to come back. the photos you get of the two of you always include you with the strangest expressions, while lucien’s face just looks like a ctrl+c ctrl+v of his usual expression.

in the end, you give up trying to scare him and just enjoy the horror houses with him, clinging to his arm when you’re scared and letting him calm you down. from the content smile on lucien’s face you see in the pictures, he looks like he’s rather enjoying this. you don’t know this, but he actually buys all the pictures and puts them in his own personal photo album. you’ll probably die of shame if you find out.

SHAW

⤞ busking together on the streets

you had mentioned being extremely nervous about your first time performing live at the live house with the band, so shaw had dragged you along with him to go busking on the streets with him. at first, you had been extremely resistant to the idea (it’s on the streets!! where people can just!! take videos of you and the entire world will know if you screw up!!), but shaw had encouraged you in his own strange way that included a lot of teasing, goading and actual breaking down of how the process would go before you felt confident enough to go with him. “don’t worry,” shaw had said standoffishly as he helped you set up your keyboard, not looking at you the entire time. “i’m way more handsome, so i’m sure they’ll be looking at me the entire time and won’t even notice if you play a completely different song.” offended, you had pulled at his ear, but you were smiling secretly to yourself the entire time, and whispered a ‘thanks’ under your breath. he pretended not to have heard it, but from the way his smirk seemed just a hint happier the entire evening, he must have.

you love little moments that lead up to the actual busking sessions every weekend, sending each other songs and working out the keys over the duration of the week. practicing together and watching as your chemistry falls more and more in sync until the two of you can do perfect runs without any words spoken between you, until you can read the little subtle cues in the way he flexes his fingers on the fretboard before going in on a particularly difficult solo, or the way he turns back to glance at you when your parts are coming up. perhaps the best thing of all is the test covers he sends you to discuss the song flows, because you (secretly) love the sound of his voice when he sings and keep every recording, listening to them when you fall asleep at night (little do you know he does the exact same thing, although he would rather die than let you find out).

shaw covers up for you when you play wrong notes, but he relentlessly teases you for them afterwards. throws hands if any hecklers in the audience insult your playing, and you have to drag him away, apologising for the rudeness while trying not to smile too hard as shaw swears loudly behind you. the money you make from the busking is usually spend on a late night supper after your busking sessions in small food joints whose owners and customers all seem to know shaw somehow, calling him a little rascal and thanking you for mellowing him out. shaw retorts by calling them old men spouting nonsense, hiding a fond smirk behind the cup of his pepsi-coke mix and stuffing food in your mouth when you laugh at him.

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airesgay · 4 years

Text

from horror films to sugar highs

relationship: jennifer jareau/emily prentiss

words: 3,723

summary: a brief history of Emily Prentiss's intimate relationship with Halloween.

Read on ao3

Halloween was a holiday you’d immediately associate with Emily Prentiss just looking at her - even more so if you’d been lucky enough to see her high school days. Of course the Goth had to be obsessed with Halloween, right? The aesthetic was all there (plus it was her favourite season, not too cold, but cold enough that black turtlenecks were suitable attire).

Except she hadn’t had the kind of parents to take their kid trick or treating – hell, she never had a suburban neighbourhood to facilitate anything of the kind.

Some might have thought she’d partaken in the odd Halloween shenanigan at college, but she was too focused on her studies to degrade herself in such activities. She did have a love for horror films, maybe because her ability to handle them better than her peers gave her a bit of a god complex – she was big enough to admit that. In all honesty, she liked Halloween because it meant her roommate was out for the night, almost guaranteed not to return until morning, and she got a quiet night to herself, to watch whatever scary films she fancied. Depending on how she was feeling she’d invite one of her (two) friends over and she’d laugh at how they cowered behind a pillow.

Halloween and Emily had a somewhat intimate relationship - a low-key affair -but it was certainly her favourite holiday: one where watching scary films by yourself was an acceptable way to celebrate, especially as an adult. It wasn’t wrapped up with the mandatory family time that Christmas or thanksgiving were, didn’t ask for fake displays of love and good will. Her mother had certainly never asked her to attend a Halloween dinner with her fellow diplomats, that required she wear a ghastly dress and make small talk with the latest prick deemed a fine young man. People said Halloween was about dressing up as someone you weren’t; for Emily it let her be who she was. Just Emily.

The past decade had gifted her many new memories. In a lot of ways it had healed old wounds; the scars would always be there, but she felt like she’d been given a second chance. To experience things in life the way normal people did.

On her first Halloween with the team she made her feeling towards all the more commercial festivities known. It took a few years, and some breaking down of walls, before she let herself be fully dragged into their shenanigans. And so she’d found herself dressed up in an itchy orange turtleneck far more block-like than she was used to, similarly blocky glasses, and an itchy brown wig that she kept trying to remove. It was all very itchy and blocky.

‘Hey, you’ll ruin the illusion!’ JJ had protested, swatting her hand away from the wig.

Emily pouted in a way that some would think exaggerated, but JJ knew her disdain was completely genuine. She laughed at the older woman as she leaned down close to her face, eyeliner poised.

‘Okay, now hold still,’ she instructed.

Emily felt her lips twitch at the feeling of hot breath on her face, pout faltering. She straightened up as JJ applied freckles to her cheeks. The blonde finished her work, but lingered just a moment, catching Emily’s eye, who’d stopped breathing a minute ago. Or rather, she wasn’t blonde at all - not right now anyway. She was currently wearing a ginger wig that looked even itchier than Emily’s, but she wore it like it was her own. In fact she wore the whole outfit like it was every-day wear. Naturally JJ would suit even a hideous wig and the most ghastly colour of purple.

She’d grown closer to the media liaison in the past year, but she still found herself watching her for too long, cursing herself for fear of making her uncomfortable. She knew nothing was ever going to happen, she just didn’t want to ruin the friendship they’d been steadily building. She wasn’t in any position to throw those away.

‘I think you should keep these,’ JJ said, breaking Emily out of her thoughts.

When she didn’t respond, JJ applied one last freckle, making Emily scoff and bat her hand away. JJ let out a hearty laugh, which only made Emily’s heart clench more. She was saved by Spencer coming bundling into the room, in a baggy green t-shirt and his natural hair sticking out in every direction. Emily didn’t think he’d needed to go quite so hard on the hair gel.

‘Oh you guys look great!’ he exclaimed, beaming brightly.

JJ gave her thanks and gestured back to Emily. ‘She’s just so cute don’t you think?’

Emily rolled her eyes, trying to hide her blush. She knew she was teasing her, but the comment still made her feel weak and she hated herself for it.

‘Okay, let’s get this show on the road,’ she declared as she tried to muster enthusiasm. ‘Garcia got her head out of Morgan’s ass yet?’

Spencer choked. ‘Well, if you mean Penelope’s fixed the back end of their costume, then I think so.’

Emily and JJ shared an amused look, shaking their heads. Of course if they were going as the Scooby gang, Penelope and Derek were doing a couples costume; the tech goddess insisting on being the front part of the beloved great dane, while Derek was left being the ass, as she put it. He didn’t complain. Hey if you’ve got it flaunt it, babygirl. Those exchanges lasted for another two minutes before any real planning took place.

Their unit chief had resigned himself to wearing a white shirt with blue collar and blonde wig, which everyone else enjoyed immensely. His excuse of taking Jack out had been quickly ripped to shreds. Nice try, Halloween isn’t until tomorrow! Penelope had fired back with glee. The oldest of their team had announced he was taking off for the weekend for a solitary fishing trip. In October? Penelope had questioned, eyes narrowed in a way that was frightening. Rossi hadn’t responded and with that he was gone, not to be seen until Monday morning.

‘Well, we better get going,’ JJ sighed, and offered Emily a hand up off the stool she’d been sat on. ‘Don’t want to give HR anything more to talk about.’

‘Oh no I’m not going to another one of those seminars.’

Emily shuddered at the thought as she took the other woman’s hand. She forced down the butterflies in her stomach.

* * *

A decade later and Emily truly felt like a kid again. Or rather, the kid she’d never got to be, like this was her first ever Halloween. Of course it wasn’t. But this was Emily’s first Halloween with the boys. Tonight felt like the start of a new tradition, something special.

Her costume choice of the night was, of course, Morticia Addams. The boys had followed suit, which was why Henry was currently decked out in a striped shirt, dyed black hair slicked back, while his little brother stood beside him with the detached end of a mop over his head, sunglasses over that. He’d desperately wanted to let his hair grow for a year in preparation but this idea had been firmly stamped out by an exasperated JJ.

She was a good mother, she let her kids express themselves however they wanted; Henry himself had worn his hair past his shoulders for many years, claiming he looked like Thor, god of thunder. However Michael’s wish was less of an expression of personal style and more a desire to look like a literal mop for Halloween. She’d caught him rolling around the floor before it’d been cleaned to achieve this effect. For hygiene and fear of head injuries, she asked him to please wait until Halloween and I will make you a costume. She was at the end of her rope when Emily then suggested he inhale helium to replicate the voice.

The whole ensemble costume had been JJ’s idea - admittedly after watching the film together the year before and not being able to think of anything other than Emily in that particular get up. It had actually worked out pretty well. The boys said it was perfect, because that’s what they were - a family. JJ definitely didn’t have to give Emily a hug when her eyes started to well with tears.

Everything was perfect. The house covered in cobwebs and skeletons and spiders, the pumpkins they’d carved together sitting out on the porch. Henry was proving to be quite the artist, and JJ had to stop herself from getting too carried away with ideas for his future. They’d made their way through all their favourite Halloween films the week before. Everything was perfect, except they were missing one family member.

JJ had been held up on a case - one of the few that had recently taken them out of state. They tried not to make that a habit these days. They were older, and as the boys so proudly declared, a family. It wasn’t that they felt the obligation to be stay at home mums now they’d reached a certain age; in fact they were anything but, still working full time at the office, and on cases in state. But they both came to a point where they didn’t want to step on that jet what felt like every single week, not knowing how long it would be until they returned.

After so many years of reading Henry bedtime stories over the phone, JJ wanted to read to Michael in person, and with Emily by her side. The mere fact that this was the first Halloween they got to spend together, when her and JJ had been dating for years now, living together for the past three and their one year wedding anniversary coming up – well it was a sign that something needed to change. Emily asked her wife if she had regrets about how she’d lived her life up until now. JJ just smiled and brought a hand up to her cheek. No, she replied, assuring her partner, I just know how I want the rest of my days to go.

And so, after over a decade of no resemblance of a real sleep schedule, they were semi-retired (which in their line of work just meant specialised desk jobs). Honestly, it was the right time; they couldn’t keep running around after psychopaths the rest of their days. Their bodies thanked them for it. Although Emily still insisted on giving JJ massages every other night. Something JJ thanked her for in kind. They’d fallen happily into their new routine, them and Garcia having their own little team on the ground.

But JJ was still as committed to the job as ever - specifically committed to the families. Which was why she wasn’t at home right now getting ready for their first real Halloween as a family.

The case they’d been working had been a hard one. Of course they were all hard, but this one hit JJ personally. She didn’t talk about her sister much, but of course Emily knew; she was one of the few people she felt comfortable talking about her with - talking about her in a way that almost didn’t hurt. So of course Emily knew as soon as she opened the case file, that JJ wouldn’t be coming home on time at the end of this case. And that was the way it was always going to go.

She’d stayed behind an extra day to sort things out with the family. It might have seemed overstepping but she’d grown a bond with them over the past week, and she would never have left when she felt someone still needed her help. She was due to be back tomorrow morning, the first flight she could get back. She was absolutely torn up about missing it. But Emily told her, as she had once before, you’re too good. It was something of a tension breaker to make JJ smile at the memory. But Emily also knew it was what JJ needed. It was moments like these that helped her.

Emily was fixing the mop atop Michael’s very bouncy head when the doorbell rang. Giving up – it would either stay on his head or it wouldn’t – she made her way to the door. And there was Penelope, holding an ever-disgruntled Sergio, who was just thankful he was not required to wear a costume. Penelope on the other hand was decked out in full witches gear.

Emily couldn’t help the laugh that came out, more like a cackle.

‘I thought you were meant to be Sabrina? Not looking very modern day teen witch there PG.’

She continued to laugh at Penelope’s trademark scowl.

‘Well that’s no fun is it!’ she shot back. ‘Besides she dressed up as a classic witch for a Halloween episode so ha! And I have this!’ She swivelled around to show off her glitter-covered vacuum cleaner. ‘Sergio is just lucky I left him be, isn’t that right Salem?’

Sergio looked up at his owner of the past nine years and Emily could have sworn she saw an eye roll. If only he could really talk, she was sure he’d have a few choice words. But she knew he loved her, so much that he made it clear who he wanted to stay with when Emily had returned from her faking her own death holiday. She didn’t take offence; who could say no to Penelope Garcia?

‘Where are my precious godsons?’ Penelope all but sang, standing up on her tiptoes to see into the kitchen.

‘We’re not precious!’

‘Oh no you are very scary!’ Penelope fake screamed and recoiled in horror as the two boys attacked her in a hug.

Penelope gave them both kisses on the cheek before looking back up to Emily. ‘Our girl not back yet huh?’

Emily sighed. ‘Pen you know she’s not flying in until tomorrow morning.’

‘Yeah’ Penelope pouted, but didn’t let herself be sad for more than a second. She immediately straightened up and placed her hands on her hips resolutely. ‘Well we’ll just have to get enough candy for your mum too won’t we? What do we save for her?’

She smiled down at the boys as they screamed their answer: ‘Cheetos!’ They then went tumbling out the door with Penelope looking after them in adoration.

Emily might have one day hoped to be in her shoes, with godsons to spoil, but never in the ones she found herself in today, with the two boys calling out into the night ‘hurry up mum we have a lot of ground to cover!’ Penelope looked back at her friend of over a decade knowingly, letting her have a moment to collect herself before she hurried after the two. Emily felt the ache in her chest at her wife’s absence subside a little watching their best friend stumble after the boys in an even higher pair of heels than usual. She considered taking a video to send to Luke but knew the wrath of Garcia was not worth it.

They made it round half their houses for the night before reaching Derek and Savannah’s. Hank answered the door in a full Black Panther outfit. Emily could have sworn he’d doubled in size since seeing him last. Though she supposed Derek would say the same of her boys. It was only because she saw them everyday.

They had settled in for evening drinks after finishing the circuit with Hank when the doorbell rang. Emily frowned. Bit too late now isn’t it? Their own boys had passed out on the couch after their sugar high. Derek and Penelope shared a knowing look. Emily eyed them suspiciously.

‘Hey Em could you get that one for me?’

Emily raised an eyebrow at him as if to say ‘get it your damn self Action Man’ (which was literally his costume choice of the night).

When he just kept smiling at her she huffed, careful not to wake the boys, and refrained from stomping towards the door. ‘His own damn house’ she grumbled as she reached the door and plastered on a fake smile she’d run out of energy for an hour ago. But she didn’t need a fake smile. No, the beaming smile she found herself wearing as she flung the door open was very much real.

‘Jen,’ she breathed, feeling somewhat winded.

‘Trick or treat?’

Standing in the doorway was her wife, wearing a full pinstripe suit and eyeliner moustache, her long blonde locks tucked underneath a fedora.

Emily felt her mouth go dry and JJ smirked, swiftly pulling her in for a kiss.

Emily broke away, catching her breath. ‘I didn’t think -’

‘Would you believe the jet suddenly became available?’

‘Really?’

‘Flew it here myself.’

Emily shook her head with a laugh and wrapped her up into a hug.

JJ nuzzled into her neck. ‘If I’d seen you in this I would have been home hours ago,’ she whispered into her ear, making Emily lose her footing.

‘Likewise,’ she returned, before pulling back and playfully stealing her wife’s hat to sit upon her own head. As she did, blonde hair was set free, somewhat breaking the illusion.

JJ cringed. ‘Didn’t really have time to do my hair as well.’

‘Not a problem,’ Emily replied as she took in the sight of her wife. JJ did the same.

‘How come everything suits you?’ JJ shook her head, just a hint of annoyance.

Emily winked and threw a glance behind them. Derek and Penelope quickly turned away, pretending to not have been listening in to the entire exchange. Emily rolled her eyes for what felt like the hundredth time that night.

‘Ready for the chaos?’ she asked.

JJ took a deep breath, steeling herself, but couldn’t help the look of sheer affection that won out. ‘Absolutely.’

‘Boys!’ Emily yelled at full volume, making Penelope all but fall off the couch, Sergio clinging to her tights. ‘You’ve got a request for your dance! Word must have really gotten out!’

Spencer had wanted them to do the periodic table song as their bit. After tripping over the first two elements it was swiftly scrapped, being replaced by the classic Adams family song. Henry and Michael had made up their own dance routine to go along with it, which Emily and JJ had been taught, and made to practice for the better part of two weeks. This was after they said no to their idea of a display similar to the one in the film, which included buckets of fake blood and decapitated fake limbs, as well as the dance with swords. Well, maybe one of them had said no.

The four of them made their way round the last few houses that still had their lights on, reveling in the feeling of finally being together. Emily and JJ walked either side of Michael, swinging him by the arms while Henry ran ahead. They knew how important it was to cherish this time; he would be a teenager before they knew it. They both shared a knowing look when Henry turned around to shout his pick for the film they’d watch when they got back. Michael protested, shouting his own pick, and they thanked the universe for assuring them in that moment that not yet.

They were cuddled up together on the couch, boys carried to bed an hour ago after crashing from their second sugar high. Thank god, JJ had whispered over the top of her youngest son’s head, and through a mouthful of Cheetos.

They’d put on the latest horror film of the year, which they always saved for this night. JJ knew the genre was something of a comfort for Emily. She knew by now the reason stemmed deeper than the one Emily had first given her: who doesn’t want a hot blonde cuddled into her shoulder for protection? Not long into their relationship, after countless nights of talking and letting each other in, she’d gotten the real reason out of her: that it represented a time that belonged to her, where she wasn’t having to please other people, and wasn’t forced to put on a mask, so to speak. Still, JJ couldn’t resist the charming eye waggle her wife gave her every year.

JJ’s favourite Halloween film was Practical Magic. The first time they’d watched it together Emily had spent the majority of the film stating how Sally was clearly gay and how horrifyingly heteronormative it all was. JJ was a smart, bisexual woman and she didn’t disagree with the critique. And yet Emily couldn’t complain whenever JJ asked if they could watch it; she would never question JJ’s love of a film about sisters. If she was honest she was glad JJ felt comfortable enough to watch something of the sort with her. The next morning when Emily made cactus shaped pancakes, JJ wondered how it was possible to fall even more in love with her. And how thankful she was that someone as impossible as Emily Prentiss did in fact exist.

‘So,’ Emily let out a breath, twirling long strands of her wife’s hair around her finger, ‘This the best outfit I’ve ever worn?’

JJ leaned her head back to meet her eyes, and narrowed her own as if in deep thought.

‘Hmmm, I don’t know, Velma really had it going on.’

Emily gasped and shoved her playfully, which reminding her of the first Halloween they’d spent together - except there was no need for her to hold anything back now. Not here, on their couch, in their home, with their boys upstairs, sleeping off a sugar high soundly.

‘Huh.’ Emily was now the one looking quizzical. She looked down at her dress. ‘Well maybe I should just take it off?’

She arched a perfectly sculpted eyebrow and JJ didn’t waste a second before leaping on top of her. ‘You should definitely take those nails off,’ the words were muffled into Emily’s neck, and earned a hearty laugh. After a deep kiss JJ pulled back to watch brown eyes flutter open slowly.

‘You bewitch me Emily Prentiss.’ she proclaimed, words that weren’t her own, but every bit true.

It was that night that Emily thought maybe Halloween was a family holiday after all.

#jemily #criminal minds #Jennifer Jareau #emily prentiss #so the pandemic has finally forced me into this #anyway please your comments are very welcome!#mine

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tripleaxeldiaz · 4 years

Text

with your heart, my soul is bound

for @hearteyesforbuck <3

part of the vermont series

read on ao3

When they told Maddie they had decided to get married in a month, Eddie was pretty sure she was going to pick both of them up and throw them out the window.

“You’re telling me,” she said with an eerie calm that made the hair on the back of Eddie’s arms stand up, “that I only have 31 days to plan a wedding from scratch in a town I barely know, all because you guys are too impatient to wait at least a year like normal people?”

“It’s actually more like 27 days—” Eddie squawked as Buck elbowed him in the ribs. He turned back to his sister, doing his best to replicate the puppy dog eyes and pout that Chris always used to try and stay up past his bedtime.

“Look, Mads…it’s just too far away.” Buck said, threading his arm through Eddie’s, squeezing his bicep. “We could go to the courthouse and get it over with, but we want to do it right. We want to do it now.” Maddie just looked at them, eyes skeptical and contemplative. “I mean, if you don’t think you’re up for it, we can always hire a wedding planner…”

“No, no way. I can do it. I’m doing it.”

Buck grinned, turning to Eddie and shooting him a wink. Eddie laughed and rolled his eyes, planting a kiss on Buck’s shoulder.

“You’re the best Mads, seriously. We owe you big.”

“I am the best, and you absolutely do, and I will absolutely be holding this over your head until the end of time.” She sat up straighter, picking up her laptop from the nearby coffee table and firing it up.

“First things first, what poor sucker am I going to have to yell at to get a venue booked on such short notice….”

~~~~~~~~~~

Eddie’s not sure if there’s a higher power at work, but if there is, they really wanted this wedding to happen. Maybe they had taken pity on them, saw both of them work and fight so hard for their own lives that when they finally found each other, found the grace and joy in each other that they hadn’t been able to give themselves, the universe said alright, you guys deserve a break. We’ll go easier on you now.

When they couldn’t find a space no matter how loud Maddie yelled, Karen had an opening at the inn in their biggest room, the perfect size for all their guests. When their first caterer fell through, Bobby stepped up immediately, offering food and desserts and a cake free of charge as a wedding gift. When none of the rental places had a dance floor big enough for what they wanted, Buck insisted on building one from scratch, and had just enough time to finish it.

When Eddie’s parents weren’t going to make it, some excuse about airline prices and not enough time to prepare, Sophia volunteered herself to walk Eddie down the aisle before he could even be too hurt about it.

A month later (27 days, Eddie, that’s not a month, those four days matter), he’s standing in awe in the middle of the room where he’s going to marry the love of his life in about 20 minutes. Buck always talked about how he was sure his sister had a little bit of magic in her, but she must have summoned a whole lot more for this because she’s worked a miracle. Forest green carpet covers the center aisle, leading to a hand carved archway Chim surprised them with at the rehearsal the night before. The arch is covered in roses and chrysanthemums in burgundy and wrapped with vines of ivy. Fairy lights hang all across the ceiling, making Eddie feel like he’s in a completely different galaxy, starlight following him wherever he goes. He feels his eyes water as he takes it all in, because even in his wildest fantasies, he never imagined everything coming together this perfectly.

“Don’t cry now, you haven’t even seen Buck yet.” Maddie’s walking up the aisle, clipboard in hand, a vision in her silver dress. It might just be the lights, but she looks a little misty too.

“Maddie, I really don’t know how we can ever thank you for all of this,” Eddie says as he looks around again. She stops in front of him, places a hand on his shoulder, silent until he looks at her dead on. She’s got that familiar sparkle in her eyes that must be a Buckley trait.

“You already have. You love my brother like he deserves to be loved, with your entire heart and soul. I can never thank you for that, but maybe we can call it even now.” She pulls him into a tight hug, kissing his cheek before letting go. “Alright, back to your room, the guests will be getting here any minute.”

He gives her a mock salute as he leaves, jogging back to the room down the hall where he and his sisters have set up camp. When he left, the kids were loud as always, fighting Sophia as she tried to get them dressed. She won, thankfully, and they’re quiet now, watching Chris play a game on his Switch. Sophia is in one of the lounge chairs, head back, eyes closed, a beer held loosely in her hands.

Eddie almost feels bad disturbing her peace when he flicks her forehead.

“You better not be drunk before my wedding,” he says as he sits in the chair next to her.

She cracks an eye open, giving him a deeply unimpressed look. “Please, one beer isn’t gonna do me in, I’m not mom.” Eddie’s stomach goes a little funny at the mention of their mother, hands unconsciously clenching into fists. Sophia sets her beer down and reaches over, rubbing his hands in hers until they relax. “You know you would have been ten times more stressed if they were here. Dad would have already found 15 things wrong with the inn, and Mom would be fighting with Maddie about the decorations.”

“I know,” Eddie sighs. “You’re right, but still, it’s so…”

“Shitty? That they refused to come to their only son’s wedding? Yeah, it is.”

“Buck’s parents aren’t coming either, they didn’t even respond to the invite. This just feels like something they all should be able to give up their pride for, you know? For family’s sake.”

“But they aren’t your family, Eddie, not really. Your family is here today, everyone who loves the both of you and wants to celebrate your love. Those are the people that matter.”

Eddie nods, squeezing Sophia’s hands. “It’s really annoying how you’re right about everything.”

She nods sagely. “It’s the cross I bear as the oldest sibling.”

They settle into comfortable silence, hands still clasped, the drone of arriving guests floating in from the main room. Despite the short notice, they’re expecting almost 100 people across family, friends, co-workers, and Army buddies. As the voices continue, Eddie’s leg starts bouncing, and he can’t stop playing with his cufflinks.

“Nervous?” Sophia asks.

Eddie shakes his head. “Not at all. I’m just— I really can’t wait to marry him.”

Sophia squeezes his hand this time, her smile soft. “I’m so happy for you, Eddie. Not just that you found Buck, either, but for everything you’ve done since you sold your book. I only ever wanted you to have the good life you deserved, and I’m so glad you have that here.”

“You’re the one who started it all,” Eddie says. “None of this would have happened if you weren’t such a snoop.”

“That’s true,” she says, laughing. “But you did all the real work. You invested in yourself and you made it happen. I just lit the match under your ass, you built the bonfire.”

Eddie’s throat feels too tight to speak, so he kisses the back of her hand instead. There’s a knock at the door before Maddie comes in, clipboard replaced with a bouquet.

“Everyone’s seated, it’s showtime.”

Sophia claps as she stands up, herding the kids, straightening ties and flattening flyways as she sends them off with Maddie. Eddie offers her his arm as she grabs her own bouquet and meets him with a blinding smile.

“Alright, Bromundo, let’s get you hitched!”

Eddie’s too excited to even fight the nickname, matching his sister’s smile as they walk out the door.

~~~~~~~~~~

The music begins and the guests stand, facing the back entrance of the hall. The twins come down the aisle first, Alexa tossing fistfuls of rose petals in front of them every few steps. Chris goes next, beaming at everyone as he goes, getting a high five from Adriana and a kiss from Abuela before taking his place at the altar.

Eddie offers Sophia his arm, and they nod to each other as they head out. When he steps into the hall again, he’s hit with the same wonder he felt the first time, even more so seeing everyone filling seats, full of joy and tears and love for him. For them. His smile is the most genuine it’s ever been, and he doesn’t even care that his cheeks already hurt. The butterflies in his stomach fly faster the closer he gets to the altar, the anticipation making his skin buzz in a wonderful way. They stop in front of the archway, and Sophia pulls him into an iron gripped hug, her arms so tight he’s worried she might leave bruises.

“You deserve this, Eddie. Every bit of it,” she whispers as she pulls away, taking her seat next to Adriana. They each blow him a kiss as he settles at the altar, Chris flashing a thumbs up from his side. Eddie looks towards the back of the aisle and feels his breath stop completely, the rest of the world melting to nothing around him. He’s glad they decided to let him walk down first because he’s not sure he’d be able to take one step with his knees feeling this weak.

Buck looks nothing less than ethereal, like the gods sent him straight down from the skies so the world could finally see what real, unfiltered beauty looks like. His burgundy suit hugs every glorious inch of him, makes his birthmark into even more of the angel’s kiss Eddie knows it is. His hair is styled but soft enough that the curls are still loose, glowing under the lights like a halo. It’s not long before Eddie’s vision blurs with tears, the happiest tears he’s ever felt, because despite the perfect packaging he’s in today, Eddie knows the man underneath, knows his passion and his mind and his gentleness, and that is the man he can’t wait to spend forever with.

He makes his way down the aisle with Maddie, his smile growing the closer he gets to Eddie. He kisses Maddie’s cheek as she drops his arm, and then he’s there, right in front of him, looking even more beautiful up close. He’s not a dream, not a trick of the light, not a cruel hallucination Eddie’s brain has cooked up. He’s real and looking at Eddie like he’s the only person in the world worth looking at.

“Hi,” Buck whispers as he takes Eddie’s hands in his calloused ones, threading their fingers together.

“Hi,” Eddie responds wetly, feeling more grounded just being in Buck’s presence than he has all day.

He doesn’t hear much past “dearly beloved”, too focused on committing every detail of Buck — the feel of his hands, the lights reflecting in his eyes, the flush of his cheeks, his smile, everything — to memory. They’re both broken from their haze as the officiant clears his throat, looking at them expectantly.

“Sorry, what?” Buck asks.

“I said, I believe the grooms have written their own vows?” They nod as the audience laughs behind them. “Eddie, whenever you’re ready.”

Eddie takes a deep breath, his knees somehow going weaker. It had been easy writing his vows — the hardest part was keeping them short, since he could easily fill up volume after volume with how he feels about Buck. But he wanted them to be special, wanted to look at his almost husband the entire time he spoke so he could see in his eyes how true his words were. So he left the paper in his pocket and memorized his words instead, went over and over them with Chris until he had them down perfectly. He was worried he’d lose everything as soon as he looked at Buck, but if anything, it cemented the words in his mind even more, branding them across his heart, completely making Buck a part of his very being.

“Evan,” he starts, sees Buck’s smile wobble, feels his hands grasp tighter. “A long time ago, I accepted that I wasn’t meant for love. That there was no one who would see my scars and love me because of them, because of the man they made me into, not in spite of them. And I was happy, for the most part. Happy to focus all my energy on Chris and raising him, making sure he knew he was loved and that he mattered. It was easy to ignore, to forget wanting to be found like that.”

“But then I moved to Vermont, and a tree fell into my son’s room. You showed up to fix it, and everything changed.” He reaches a hand up to Buck’s cheek, wiping away the tears tracing paths down his face. “You fixed everything in our house, but you didn’t try and fix me. You saw the cracks and scuffs and pieces hanging by threads, and you still thought I was beautiful. You’ve witnessed the best and ugliest sides of me, and you’ve never made me feel the need to compensate for not being perfect. You see me, all of me. And for the rest of my life, I will do my best to make sure you know I see you too. To make sure you know, always, that Chris and I love you to the ends of the earth. That even if your own cracks get deeper and your scuffs get worse, I will always see you for the amazing man that you’ve become. Thank you for loving me, and for letting me love you. Thank you for not fixing me. Thank you for finding me.”

Buck sneaks a look at the officiant before leaning forward and placing a quick kiss on Eddie’s cheek. There’s laughs again, in between sniffles and rustling tissues. He sees Buck take his own breath, meeting Eddie’s eyes again, and Eddie can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of him, his own happiness apparently too much for his body to keep inside.

“I’m clearly not the writer in this relationship,” he says, with more laughter from the audience. “I’m not always the best with my words, but I am a man of action, and I always keep my promises. So I promise you, Edmundo Diaz, to always have your back. I promise to love you every day, and even more on the days that you don’t think you deserve to be loved. I promise to catch you when you fall and to always fight for you, even if you are the person I have to fight. You talk about how I found you, but baby, we found each other. And I have no intention of ever letting you go.”

He takes a step past Eddie then, taking a knee in front of Chris and taking both of his small hands. “And you, Christopher,” he says. “I promise you that I will always keep you safe and do whatever I can to make sure you’re happy. I promise to help you be the best person you can be, and to support you no matter what. And I promise to always order extra olives on our pizza for you, even though I know your dad hates them.” Eddie snorts, and Chris’s laughter is loud and bright as he throws his arms around Buck’s neck, crutches clattering to the floor.

“I love you Buck.”

“I love you too buddy,” Buck whispers, kissing the side of Chris’s head. He straightens up, hands Chris his crutches before taking his place in front of Eddie again. It takes every ounce of strength he has to not kiss Buck right then, instead mouthing “I love you” because it’s the only thing that won’t get him yelled at by the officiant or Abuela.

They exchange rings, promising love and honor, to cherish each other until death do they part. Eddie’s hands are steady as he slides Buck’s ring on, because there’s nothing for him to be nervous about now. This is the one thing in his life he’s most certain about, most secure in, even more so than being a father sometimes. His love for Buck is unwavering, built of the strongest stuff in the universe. There’s no room for doubts to creep in.

The officiant wraps up, has barely pronounced them husbands when Eddie wraps his arms around Buck’s waist, pulling him in and kissing him like he’s been wanting to since he walked down the aisle. It’s deep and all-consuming and perfect, and Eddie feels absolutely electric. He kisses him again, and again, and one more time just because, before turning to scoop Chris up in his arms. He holds him on one hip, his other hand in Buck’s, and the three of them make their way back down the aisle through their clapping, cheering family.

~~~~~~~~~~

Cocktail hour passes in a blur as they mingle with guests on the back deck of the inn. They’re surrounded by the oranges and yellows of the autumn forest, and everything feels cozy and warm, full to bursting with happiness. The room is transformed for the reception, tables draped in burgundy and forest green, candles burning in their silver centerpieces, adding to the glow of the fairy lights. Dinner is lively, but everything is background noise to Eddie. He’s too wrapped up in Buck, in the feel of his arm around his shoulder, in watching him laugh, listening to him commentate on their family interacting and laughing along with him. Every so often he’s slapped by the reminder that this is it, that he and Buck are he and Buck forever, and he’s sure this unbridled joy that he feels will never fully wear off.

Maddie makes a speech, full of heartfelt wishes for their future together. Sophia makes one too, more focused on roasting her brother to oblivion, but with all the love in the world. When she’s done, she hands the microphone to Chris, who stands and faces the crowd.

“Hi, I’m Christopher, and those are my dads.” He points to Buck and Eddie at their table, and Eddie feels Buck’s breath hitch. It’s not the first time Chris has called them “his dads”, but it seems to catch Buck by surprise every time. Eddie smiles, kisses his cheek, and places a comforting hand on his thigh.

“I just want to say that I’m really glad Buck is officially part of our family now. Dad always tells me to find the things that make me happy, and I know Buck makes him very happy, and he makes me very happy too. I love you guys! Thank you!” Buck is up in an instant, quickly striding towards Chris to wrap him up and swing him around in a hug. Eddie is quickly behind him, arms coming around them both.

As they set Chris down, the DJ announces that it’s time for the first dance. Buck offers his hand, leading Eddie out to the middle of the homemade dance floor, and Eddie once again feels like they’ve been transported to their own universe, just the two of them among the stars. As they sway, chests pressed together, eyes never leaving the other’s for long, Eddie takes in the lyrics of the song:

Life is ever changing but I will always

Find a constant and comfort in your love

With your heart my soul is bound

And as we dance I know that heaven can be found

And that’s what they are together: constant, comfortable, a home that they’ve both been searching for for longer than they can remember. Things won’t always be easy, since life never is, but they know that they’ll always be able to fall back on each other. No mistakes, no slip ups, no amount of darkness will be able to crack the steel-enforced foundation of their love. They’re in this together, tied together for life, and while that could be scary for some, it’s exhilarating for Eddie. He is finally, finally, in a love that consumes him. And he finally believes he’s worthy of it.

“What’s on your mind?” Buck asks, a curious smile on his face as they keep dancing.

“You,” Eddie responds, kissing Buck’s jaw as his blush grows. “Us. How much I love you. How excited I am for our future.”

Buck smiles, rivaling the sun, and rests their foreheads together. Eddie could stay in this starlight filled bubble of theirs forever.

“This is just the beginning, baby,” Buck says. “Us and Chris against the world. And it’s only gonna keep getting better from here.”

#buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #buddie fic #9-1-1 fox #this is so fluffy i'm sorry if it hurts your teeth #ELI ILY THANK YOU FOR THIS BEAUTIFUL AU #vermont!verse

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