#defending abuse

[furiousgoldfish]

abuser: spends years meticulously isolating, grooming, trapping and sabotaging victim to the point where they don't know they're abused, blame themselves, think abuse is just normal, feel no confidence about any of their skills, have no one and no way of survival if they escape, and they're aware their lives are threatened if they try

society: well why didn't the victim just leave if they didn't like it :/

#escaping abuse #abuse sabotage #toxic society #abuse denial #denial of reality #defending abuse #victim blaming #victim shaming

[wilteddreamsofbaldursgate]

I’m a fierce believer and defender of Smooth Brain Astarion (affectionate).

I love that, if left to his own devices, he ends up dead in a ditch. I love that this pasty menace of an elf is a walking disaster. I love that his brain produces one coherent thought per day, only to have it backfire on him later on. I love that his first choice in freedom is to unapologetically be the worst version of himself. Because it makes sense. 

That’s what abuse and trauma do to your brain—they fuck with it. 

And in Astarion’s defence, the man didn’t have to use his brain for nearly 200 years—it’s probably the very thing that kept him as alive as he can be; to survive 200 years of pure shit. 

And what use is his brain when his days and nights are dictated by someone else for as long as he can remember? When he has no say in what clothes he wears. When he doesn’t get to choose what or when to eat. When his body and mind aren’t his own, distorted by torture and hunger and self-loathing, forced to obey his vampiric master. Why use his brain when his survival depends exclusively on his abuser’s whims? 

Astarion could’ve come up with the most brilliant plan possible to escape Cazador or save a mark from their doom, but he never stood a chance of succeeding—which doesn’t mean that he didn’t get punished for trying (or even thinking about it) anyway.

Existing under Cazador was a game he couldn’t win, so why bother playing? 

And it’s only by chance that Astarion’s autonomy is returned to him literally overnight. It’s only natural that he’s overwhelmed by his newfound freedom. How is he expected to make sound decisions when he can’t even recall a time when he could do and say as he pleased? 

Of course Astarion is a walking disaster when he finds himself on that beach after the Nautiloid crash—and he’s fully aware of that! That’s why it’s so crucial for him to get on the player’s/other companion’s good side.

He’s self-aware enough to be so insecure about himself that he would rather trust a stranger’s capabilities than his own. 

Being a catastrophe of a person is part of Astarion’s character journey. Not only does he have to reclaim his personhood, he has to learn how to depend on his own brain again and I think that's such a painfully beautiful, important message Baldur’s Gate 3 sends. 

Because healing isn’t pretty. Nor is it easy.

You’re not alright the moment you’re free of whatever horrors you had to live through—and that’s ok! There’s time and room for you to adjust. 

And the moment Astarion feels more or less safe within his new environment, when he’s fed and treated like a person worthy of respect and consideration, his insights, skills and perception are crucial assets to the group.

Astarion knows his art and literature, and although his little remarks are unhinged at times, he's genuinely witty. Even his objections are, considering the circumstances, absolutely legitimate.

Personally, I love seeing Smooth Brain Astarion become more and more secure in his judgement the more Tav/other companions trust and support him.

Astarion is smart, his brain’s just been stewed for nearly 200 years.

#baldur’s gate 3 #bg3 #baldur’s gate iii #astarion #astarion ancunin #bg3 astarion #astarion headcanons #smooth brain astarion I will defend you until you can do it yourself #trauma can give you literal brain damage #of course he's a little eccentric #tw: trauma #tw: abuse #smooth brain astarion

[nerdpoe]

Jack and Maddie Fenton are trying to capture Danny, their son, to vivisect him. Just one problem; they're possessed, and no one believes Danny when he says that.

He knows his parents. They love him, and they would never do this.

Also, his breath gets frosty when they're near, and their eyes are glowing when he managed to rip off the goggles on his dad.

Danny, unfortunately, has his hands tied. Literally. They slapped some sort of ghost containment shackles on his wrists. All he can do is run, dodge, and try to get his parents to fight off whoever is possessing them.

The biggest problem is this; his begging got the attention of Superman. Like, the actual Man of Steel himself. And Superman doesn't believe him when he says his parents are possessed; he just looks all pitying and shit.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt #clark thinks it's a typical case where an abused child tries to defend their abusers #danny thinks clark is an idiot #jack and maddie aren't thinking much on the grounds that they're possessed

[lobotomyladylives]

Actresses being tortured on the set by male directors is a massive historical and present day scourge of the film and TV industries and it's really SO common when you look into it. like from Kubrick terrorizing Shelley Duvall (and only her) on the set of the shining to Tarantino strangling Diane Kruger until she passed out to Hitchcock replacing fake birds with real birds after Tippi Hedren rejected his advances (in order to scare and physically injure her as a punishment for not fucking him) to James Cameron almost literally drowning Kate Winslet to an actress on GOT being waterboarded ten hrs straight to get like a minute of footage to Brando improvising an unscripted rape scene on the last tango in Paris set with the directors permission that ended up traumatizing Maria Schneider (in fact quite a lot of the gratuitous, graphic rape scenes in film were included for the sadistic pleasure of the male directors at the expense of the actresses).

The list goes on and on and I could seriously talk for ages about how revolting it is that these men still have active careers bc the industry just tolerates it. No piece of art is worth inflicting this disgusting and unnecessary abuse on actresses (and it's ALWAYS the actresses isn't it, never the actors. Hmmm wonder why). We call these men auteurs and geniuses but they're really just pathetic abusive sacks of shit. I want to impale every male director who behaves like this and I want their rotting corpses displayed as a part of the universal studios tour.

#the excuses ppl use to defend them are so pathetic too. ''oh they just want to draw out the best performance'' BUUUULLSHIT #1) if that was true why is it only actresses being abused #2) how come other accomplished directors dont do this but still manage to make great movies. perhaps bc its TOTALLY UNNECESSARY #male directors are as a whole some of the most demented individuals in all of showbiz & thats saying smth #as a wannabe director myself it makes me extremely sad bc its so hard for a woman to break into directing yet men like this still get to #make movies and continue being psychopaths to their actresses??? fuck off

[loverofmirage]

While I've been searching up conversations on the way callout culture is weaponized as an instrument of transmisogynistic I've come across a sentiment repeated multiple times by non-transfems, that trans women speaking out against this phenomena are themselves abusers, or speaking against callout culture to "protect abusers in our midst". They hold that the current usage of callouts is justified by implying that our community is filled with sexual deviants. They could barely be any more mask off with how they view trans women. They are not holding other group to this standard. They don't seem to advocate for witch-hunts to root out the sexual deviants among other groups. You can just say you view all trans women as sexual predators that need rooting out at this point.

#transmisogyny #tw transmisogyny #Starting the clock on how long before someone with terrible reading comprehension accuses me of defending abusers

[theluckiestlb]

#ml #miraculous ladybug #it's vomit o'clock #as happy as I am for the kids #there are some things I can't get over #abusers being put on a LITERAL pedestal is one #miraculous ladybug spoilers #ml recreation #ml recreation spoilers #ml spoilers #adrien agreste #gabriel agreste #marinette dupain cheng #y'all I've been sitting on this for MONTHS #PRAYING they changed the finale #oh well 🙃 #i've defended astruc before #this one I can't forgive

[gin-juice-tonic]

#sometimes people seem to get the impression that ford never defended his brother cause of the scene where stan gets kicked out #but in that same scene- stan expects ford to help him #doesnt that say something too? #tw abuse #implied

[a-heart-of-kyber]

The way many in the bg3 fandom go:

Astarion: Abused/Traumatized

Shadowheart: Abused/Traumatized

Lae'zel: Abused/Traumatized

Karlach: Abused/Traumatized

Wyll: Abused/Traumatized

Gale:...is a wizard.

Will be part of my villain origin story, cuz y'all the point was apparently like 12ft above your heads.

#GALE IS ALSO TRAUMATIZED YOU DINGUS #in case you missed it the point is that they're All abuse victims #gale of waterdeep #gale dekarios #Mystra IS a Predator in BG3 #regardless of what other lore surrounds her she is still a predator with a canonical Pattern/Type #gale is a victim who is literally just learning he was a victim because that's how warped their 'relationship' was #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 spoilers #baldur's gate spoilers #spoilers #if you defend mystra...don't

[warrior-cats-rewritten]

Literally go fuck yourself.

https://archive.ph/2019.12.27-222825/https://erinhunter.katecary.co.uk/the-blazing-star-spoiler-page/comment-page-10/%23comments for if you wanna go read this for yourself and see.

#warrior cats #warriors #tom wc #bumble wc #turtle tail #turtle tail wc #dotc #dawn of the clans #kate cary #i have no words #this actually made me sick to my stomach #why are you frothing at the mouth to defend men who abuse women #why are you insisting that abusive men should be treated fairly #why are you so aggressively insisting that they should become 'lovely' so they can maybe feel guilty #instead of any actual real punishment #no i don't want tom to get better #i want him to rot in hell and get eaten by one eye #one eye wc #remember kids #wishing abusers harm means you're just as bad as they are #wc gray wing #wc clear sky #wc bumble

[ewwww-what]

Aelwyn Abernant and a vision of her sister

#fh s2 e19 #‘she’s just.. she’s a baby.’ killed me SO BAD. #thinking about this scene in relation to how terrifyingly literal the nightmare forest becomes when you’re that close to the middle #Aelwyn Abernant how young was the sister you were protecting in Sylvaire #did you look in her eyes and see the child you never defended? #abernant sisters #aelwyn abernant #adaine abernant #aelwyn o'shaughnessey #adaine o'shaughnessey #aelwyn fantasy high #adaine fantasy high #fantasy high #d20 #d20 fantasy high #dimension 20 #d20 fanart #fantasy high fanart #fhsy #fhsy spoilers #cw child abuse #child abuse cw #(just because of the context of the scene) #undescribed #not described #my art

[furiousgoldfish]

'Aw but don't you feel sorry for your abuser' 'oh maybe they've been abused themselves, you have to think about that!' 'but maybe they're only doing it because they have a mental illness! You have to look at it from their perspective!'

DON'T YOU THINK MY PRIORITY SHOULD BE TO GET AWAY FROM ABUSE WHILE I'M STILL ALIVE?

Also, why are you immediately putting yourself in the shoes of my abuser but not me? Do you feel it's more likely you'd be abuser in that situation, rather than the abused? Do you think this situation requires some virtue signaling and boasting about how you'd be a 'more compassionate' victim? Are you here to help them abuse me? Are you here to make sure it keeps continuing? Do you think anyone with a mental illness should have free reign to abuse me, or you? Do you think people threatened by a predator need to be running away or stopping to see how the predator would feel about it?

#abuse #flying monkeys #defending abuse #abuse excuses #child abuse #abuser defending society #empathizing with abusers and shaming the victims #judging victims moral but never the abusers #victims being put on spot for their feelings while abusers actions are defendable and justifiable

[oh-snapperss]

i really thought we'd hit rock bottom with how shit wilbur's response was but george has somehow already managed to be worse. can't say i'm shocked though.

support caiti.

#lord. gathering evidence as if she wasnt sobbing on camera. theres no evidence #he is literally just utilizing the favt his fans will defend him to the end of the earth and beyond. FUCK him. #discourse #tw abuse #tw sa mention #georgenotfound #wilbur soot #<tagged for filtering

[solargeist]

the amount of strength and bravery Shelby has inspired in so many girls is incredible, I know this must be stressful for her, but I hope she also knows the good and change she sparked

#im also happy seeing other CCs speak up and defend victims now #shame and deplatform abusive misogynistic men💥💥 #cw abuse #shubblesupportsquad

[hussyknee]

I'm really not a villain enjoyer. I love anti-heroes and anti-villains. But I can't see fictional evil separate from real evil. As in not that enjoying dark fiction means you condone it, but that all fiction holds up some kind of mirror to the world as it is. Killing innocent people doesn't make you an iconic lesbian girlboss it just makes you part of the mundane and stultifying black rot of the universe.

"But characters struggling with honour and goodness and the egoism of being good are so boring." Cool well some of us actually struggle with that stuff on the daily because being a good person is complicated and harder than being an edgelord.

Sure you can use fiction to explore the darkness of human nature and learn empathy, but the world doesn't actually suffer from a deficit of empathy for powerful and privileged people who do heinous stuff. You could literally kill a thousand babies in broad daylight and they'll find a way to blame your childhood trauma for it as long as you're white, cisgender, abled and attractive, and you'll be their poor little meow meow by the end of the week. Don't act like you're advocating for Quasimodo when you're just making Elon Musk hot, smart and gay.

#this is one of the reasons why #although i would kill antis in real life if i could #i also don't trust anyone who identifies as 'pro-ship' #it's just an excuse to shut down legitimate ethical questions and engaging in honest self-reflective media consumption and critique #art doesn't exist in a vacuum #it's a flat impossibility for it not to inform nor be informed by real world politics and attitudes #because that's what it means to be created by human hands #we can't even make machine learning thats not just human bias fed into an algorithm #if the way we interact with art truly didn't influence anything then there would be no value in it #just because antis have weaponized those points in the most bad faith ways possible #doesn't mean you can ignore them in good faith #anyway fandom stans villains because society loves to defend and protect abusers #it's not because you get the chance to be free and empathetic and indulge in your darkness and what not #it's just people's normal levels of attachment to shitty people with an added layer of justification for it #this blog is for boring do-gooder enjoyers only #lol #knee of huss #fandom wank #media critique #pop culture #fandom discourse

[bugflies00]

christ i can't believe we even still need to make posts like this but if you're genuinely saying shit about how the ABUSE shubble described isn't even that bad i need you to hard block me right now. saying that neurodivergent people bite is just so not the fucking point. yes of course some people bite each other as a sign of affection. biting in itself was never the fucking problem. but it is abusive to intentionally cause someone pain when they've communicated repeatedly they want you to stop. to make up a safeword to use against them. that is abusive full stop in itself, and it wasn't even the only thing shubble described. i don't want to see anymore posts trying to discredit that when shubble has already been through so much.

#im just . apalled #i didnt understand why people kept talking about people defending wilbur because i hadnt seen any like that #but Now Ive Seen (at least some) and jesus fucking christ #alex.rambles.txt #tw abuse #tw physical abuse #tw victim blaming

[tetrakarn]

pulling myself briefly out of the depression pit to say i don't think it's fair to say ivan is outright violent towards till or shows his affection through violence bc in every piece of media that shows them fighting ( that i can find at least ) till always turns things physical first

not that ivan doesn't instigate by doing or saying things that might provoke him ( intentionally or otherwise ) but aside from touching till's injury in one of the r6 flashbacks he doesn't seem to be physically hurting him for attention. i think the fight scene in r6 is also the only time we've even seen him retaliate

#alien stage #i'm not saying this is like a moral failing on till's part #i don't think he's like bad or anything bc he lashes out #like we've seen what this kid's childhood was like #what his adult life is CURRENTLY still like #and i'm also not saying ivan is blameless in their fights #but people saying till doesn't like him bc he's violent and reminds him of his abuse is very........ it feels incorrect #i don't think painting ivan as an abuser especially as a child is right #ivan instigates bc he wants attention #and till gets mad bc lashing out at things bothering you is probably how he was treated #they're both going through it man can we cut the kids a little slack #that cafeteria flashback was fucking weird tho i can't defend you on that one ivan