#cheap romances

[antiqua-lugar]

tav being canonically so attractive that people just throw themselves at them is super funny as a galemancer because like so many people in-game (and the game itself at times) call gale either annoying or pathetic straight up to his face but tav is turning down all of faerun for him. everyone desires them carnally and they are busy getting ready to be introduced to gale's cat over dinner.

#nevermind all the cheap shots about gale being vanilla and boring at sex but when you romance him he's like let's have astral sex #faerun most misunderstood relationship #like i still think mizora only wants to have sex with tav to get to wyll but imagine being mizora #but imagine her thinking she got this in the bag because she's a powerful sexy demon and she really doesn't #sorry but the game taking so many cheap shots at gale makes me obsessed with this #and like on paper his ex is still mystra so like #antiqua plays bg3 #gale #gale of waterdeep #bg3

[aro-culture-is]

aro culture is getting so fucking tired of people using the fact that there's a queer romance in something as a reason you should watch it. like haven't allos had enough of romance? queer or otherwise? I'm not saying queer representation is bad, of course, I'm just fed up with asking what a book is about and in response all I get is "oh it has queer people in it" cool! what is it about? having queer representation is not the be all end all of media can we please have ONE thing without romance in it. please.

.

#electroniccollectiondonut #aro culture is #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #ask #mod phoenix #yeah... it's like. this is a bad metaphor but it's all i got right now: #i'm vegetarian. it's not uncommon that if an event is hosted 'with food' that every single main dish contains a fair amount of meat #and most of the side dishes too #maybe the salad has chicken. the soup is a meat broth soup. the main course is steak. i literally cannot tell you how often this happens. #and if you're lucky there's like... bread rolls and butter. sometimes there's the Cheap Salad that's just tossed lettuce #and i promise you from experience: if i ask beforehand i am always told there will be something for me to eat #but like. believe it or not 1) that's not filling 2) it's usually the two poorest quality items on the line 3) i prefer salads as SIDES #i see similar stuff on the occasion i'm told there's any sort of 'rep' for aro folks #it's like... okay but the vast majority of the media is still very romance focused and the elements that aren't are usually... hm #not comparably interesting in how they're executed? #or it's like. kids media. which can be good - but i'd like to be allowed to have content that can be both for an adult audience #and NOT romance

[csphire]

Dammon Thinking

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #dammon #still crying about how we cannot romance him #i just think he's neat #even back in early access was crushing hard on him #also thought we would find him dead in a ditch in act 2 once the game dropped for some cheap drama #thank you larian for not letting him die in a ditch

[sluttyten]

I had a dream last night that some new NCT album teaser pics dropped and Haechan’s was a shirtless one and the man had a six pack , like he was ripped

#he basically looked like the type of shirtless man you’d see on the cover of a romance novel 😂 #shirtless and glistening #but he was wearing like black dress pants and was standing in front of a purple background with some like glittery purple streamer curtain #things?? like those cheap prom decorations? #also his hair was longish and chocolatey brown #it was a very very nice look #don’t know where this dream came from but I’m not complaining

[greenerteacups]

Hi GT, I was reading one of your wonderful responses and you mentioned you don't love what they did to Remus, and I have to say I 100% agree. In my opinion his relationship with tonks is weird (regardless of whether people think he had chemistry with Sirius) like he's at least 10 years older than her and he tries to leave her and it just seems like he goes along with HER infatuation without really caring about her very much. It also puts Tonks back into JKR's frequent dynamic for women, which is "badass who really wants to be with a guy who doesn't seem to appreciate her much" (see Hermione/Ron).

Do you have any further thoughts on that? I always found JKR's writing about women in relationships/who want relationships really weird. You definitely do it better.

JKR has many strengths as a writer, but I don't think anyone would say her romances are one of them. I think a lot of authors either consciously or subconsciously look down on romance as a genre because it's associated with sensuality and frivolousness, but writing and selling the idea that two people should and do want to kiss each other is like, really fucking hard to do, and it requires a certain set of skill checks as an author that not everyone has. Just like writing good horror or good fantasy, good romance has tenets and rules and things you can do to get the audience on board with you, and JKR didn't execute a lot of those things (to my satisfaction, YMMV) in the books. Bad romance is also a high-stakes problem, because it risks flattening out your characters and pitching them into OOC territory if the audience doesn't buy that the dynamic evolution is natural. But again, that's something you don't know if you haven't written romance, or tried to, before.

Mostly, you have to really lean into the vulnerability of the thing. Romance is silly and goofy and embarrassing. It makes you say dumb things and act in dumb ways. It can't be ironic or chilled or demure. At some point, to make a real human connection, someone has to get down, take off their dignity, and bare the rotten core of themselves. When we propose, we kneel on the ground. We get dirty. And all authors have a great terror of embarrassing themselves. They're doing something tremendously vulnerable; of course they want people to think they're cool and intelligent. It's embarrassing to put yourself in the head of a 15-year-old boy with a crush. It's embarrassing to write about a suitor earnestly confessing their love, because — what if this is too much? What if it's corny, what if it breaks the audience's suspension of disbelief? What if my readers are laughing at me? What if I'm the butt of the joke?

Anyway, I think a lot of really great books have terrible romance subplots for that reason. In The Great Gatsby, we never actually see Gatsby and Daisy alone together. We get their story second-hand, from people who can deliver it in a cool, reflective tone of mystery; we don't see them undressed, undone, emptying their hearts to one another. And Nick and Jordan, the romance we actually get to see develop, are easily the weakest plot in the book. Meanwhile, authors like Tolstoy have an incredible gift for writing romance that feels right, and is sensual without verging into purple prose. But Tolstoy is one of the greatest writers of all time. JKR wrote some very good books that a lot of people loved very much, but for her, the romances were accessories to the story. They weren't a focus. I'm certain she cared about Remus and Tonks's relationship, in the same way she cared about Ron and Hermione's relationship. Both take up too much space to explain otherwise.

TLDR: Writing romance is hard because it's really easy to fuck up, even if you care about it. I don't know that JKR put all that much thought into selling us on chemistry and interpersonal dynamics of the couples she threw together; I think she writes for plot, and the couples emerged as a part of that. That means the couples that don't necessarily make sense on paper lose out majorly because the audience doesn't know exactly what they're rooting for, and the couples that do make sense on paper lack a certain... I dunno, va-va-voom.

#we could also say fairly that as it's harry's story he wouldn't be witnessing most of the romances happening around him in private #but like that's kind of cheap to me because people have been writing rich ensemble stories in third person limited for centuries #you can sell a romance without literally showing them kiss #I don't see what my couple friends do behind closed doors but I know that I like them and think they're cute together #and that's kind of what you as an author are trying to do #greenteacup asks

[fictionadventurer]

I know I just said that we shouldn't categorize people in history, but when it comes to the presidential podcast, I do find myself sorting presidents into "good" and "garbage" piles based on how they treated their wife.

Good

Ulysses S. Grant gets top marks here. I'm not crazy about his wife, but he was, and they're cute together. She was sunny and upbeat enough to boost him through a lot of years of struggle, and he was devoted to both her and the children.

Theodore Roosevelt was a loving husband to both his wives and a ridiculously devoted father to all his children.

James Garfield starts out in the garbage pile because he married her without love and had an affair, but the way they both overcame that to fall deeply in love is a pretty beautiful redemption.

Woodrow Wilson seems to have had a pretty good relationship with his wife. I know less about them so this is a tentative classification, but she was willing to basically help run the country after his stroke, so it suggests there was something good there.

Garbage

Warren Harding reigns in the garbage can. Multiple unrepentant affairs with long-term mistresses.

FDR was already on pretty shaky ground in my mind, but once I learned he had an affair with Eleanor's secretary, and then Eleanor stayed with him through polio, and then at his death he was with this same secretary while Eleanor was away, he lost a lot of points.

Middle Ground

Lincoln and his wife had a pretty rocky relationship, but from what I can tell they tried to make it work and were planning on taking steps to improve things before his death.

Chester Arthur's wife hated that he was constantly away on political business, which gives him a lot of bad husband points, but also she did want that high-class, high-status lifestyle, and from what I can tell he did love her and had a lot of regrets after she died.

#history is awesome #presidential talk #i've got inklings about some of the other guys but can't say for sure #and i recognize that things are about to get worse and worse as we head deeper into the 20th century #one thing this podcast has done is make me lament even more the death of romance #some of these letters people wrote in the 19th century are wow #you don't get that level of emotional openness anymore #there is so much flowery language #so much emotional openness even from men #men waxing poetic about all the things they love about their wives #and then we hit warren harding and they specifically mention how modern his letters to his mistresses feel #because he's being blunt and crass #and the people are like 'on one level it's relatable and kind of cool to see that they're people like us' #but i'm just like 'in what way is this an improvement?' #we've lost so much respect and decency and devotion and instead settle for cheap crass 'honesty' #i'd much rather make men live up to the higher standard

[catboykilljoy97]

When I was 14 I had a pet mouse named Mikey and when I told people his name I always worried they would think I had tried to name him Mickey (as in Mickey Mouse) but misspelled it meanwhile his actual namesake was Mikey Way because I had a big-ass MCR poster on my wall at the time

#rest in peace Micheal Way Mouse you were so spoiled #little man hit the jackpot he was just a cheap petstore mouse and then he got adopted by #a teenager with too many feelings who had researched mouse care for months because i was kinda a perfectionist #i loved that tiny bastard he sat on my shoulder when i did homework and he got a piece of noodle every time we had spaghetti for dinner #cbkj speaks #pet mice #fancy mice #mcr #my chemical romance #mikey way

[starswallowingsea]

Every time I think about how the Colleen Hoover fangirlies get mad when people even suggest that they should try and diversify their portfolios I get really, really sad. Like I don't think you have to read classics or anything and be an elite snob but if you limit yourself to just Colleen Hoover and maybe Sarah J Maas and a few other popular booktok authors, you're missing out on so so much. Even if you just want to find good new releases, keeping up with the book of the month club will give you plenty of options (even if you can't subscribe to them and have to get them from the library). Diversify your portfolio. Read older mass market paperback romances or literally anything else.

#shay speaks #anti colleen hoover #anti coho #do i put this in the coho tags too............ #do i want more drama from that anon who clearly doesnt have any reading comprehension #anyway for any of u coho stannies stalking the anti coho tags. #i'm not saying this to be elitist #literally one of my favorite books from last year is a mass market paperback romance novel from 2008 #the classics are like any other genre of books. you'll love some and hate others #and maybe actually try reading pride and prejudice without swapping out the names for your blorbos #and sitting with the themes of it. maybe you wont like it! maybe you will! only way to find out is to actually read it #even reading books you end up not liking can help you figure out your taste better #and you can think about what works for you and what doesnt from them #but please branch out. #anyway i'm done. i'm having another moment i just feel really bad for people who never bother to try things that #werent released in the last 5 years. go find some stuff on thrift books for cheap #probably my favorite way to find books

[belle-keys]

my problem with the fantasy and romance genres these days is that books feel like a sequence of tropes in lieu of a story

books are being sold and promoted on the basis of them containing "only one bed, enemies to lovers, blade to the neck, hurt/comfort, touch her and I'll kill you" and similar beloved tropes

while it's impossible to write without any tropes, popular tropes are now the main aspect by which books get promoted on media platforms and even in retailers instead of narrative fiction

#and it's quite a cheap strategy despite its effectiveness #book tropes #books and literature #ya books #ya fantasy #ya lit #fantasy books #romance books #tropes #publishing #booktok #book talk #unpopular opinion #reader #books

[viihoff]

I LOVE how much freedom this game gives for headcanons. I love how it feels like a story you're being retold to, with gaps for you to fill. I love how you can make your characters' story entirely in your mind, and the game has enough flexibility to absorb your ideas. It's a sandbox for writers.

My Durge and Astarion are a Jaime and Brienne© type of ship, for example, my most beloved (and probably one of the few) pair ever.

She's a goody good paladin, straightforward and with a faint autistic rizz, and he's a cunning bastard with a sharp tongue and The Attitude. They clicked the moment I finished polishing my Durge's mad sith eyes in the character creator, and ever since I experienced the sweetest slow burn ever.

Astarion is a prick and a bitch and is literally I-would-hate-him-in-real-life type of a guy. And he needs love, and acceptance, and warmth, he just needs someone to believe in him, to trust in him. He's a good person at heart, if you let him (and give him a good example, of course). And El Friska is a righteous idealist who believes that although she cannot save everyone, at least she will do her best. Goodness and kindness is something you bring in the world, and others follow, she says.

Yet, she has an immense darkness inside her heart, one that she, being a literal knight (paladin in this case and a devotee of Selune) would NEVER share with anyone BUT someone like Astarion. He gets her. He accepts her. And she accepts him. He accepts her darkness and she does the same for him. She accepts his light, and he admires her for her golden heart, and they bonded like a pair of emo kids in the 9th grade.

In the end, it's not her who saves him, they both pull themselves out of shit. He saved her the same way she did.

God, I love this fucking game and what you can do with it.

#baldur's gate 3 #astarion #dark urge #astarion x tav #astarion x dark urge #El Friska #Their romance is basically 'I dreamed of you' type of romance #it begins like a fight to the death and ends like a cheap love novel #Astarion was right when he said there will be poems about them when they both die lmao #but there's no sadness in this ship allowed #nope #they lived happily ever after #and when they died #they found each other in their new lives #text post #TRAUMA BONDING TRAUMA BONDING!

[altschmerzes]

here’s another thought i have on the finale which isn’t very high stakes but has been driving me Fucking Nuts:

re: the fight between jamie and roy about keeley. i thought it was stupid and lazy writing that did a disservice to everything else that dynamic was and encompassed. there was so much more there and THAT was how we closed it out eh? like kudos to her for going ‘uh, no’ and kicking them out, that was a good call, but the whole thing sucked so bad generally and wasted time we could’ve spent doing literally anything other than the most cliche, juvenile, classic ‘women are a prize for men to fight over’ thing. however what’s annoying me even more is the way people who DID like it are responding to people who didn’t.

i keep seeing people be like “ACTUALLY them fighting over her was fine and normal youre all just babies who can’t handle that sometimes people REGRESS and sometimes people are MEAN and UNFAIR and UNKIND” and it’s like nah man it’s because they avoided doing this shit entirely for three fucking years and then were like do you want the cliche love triangle bullshit you dodged the whole time heaped on you at the last second when it makes the least sense? sure, here you go!

is it regression if it’s something they never did in the first place? i think not! and characters can be mean and unfair and cruel and whatever and it’s not the end of the world, i actually think it’s very interesting, and THAT’S not the part i find out of character, it’s that they literally never did this before and now after EVERYTHING else, after how clear it was how gravely fucking serious jamie was about the video leak, this is the kind of shit they’re throwing at each other about this? after repeatedly subverting expectations of classic love triangle nonsense? it’s tired and it’s lazy and it’s the cheapest option and nobody is gonna be able to change my mind by telling me i just don’t understand that People Can Be Unfair Sometimes.

#gav gab #this isn’t even getting into some of the other stuff that’s driving me nuts but like #maybe this is just me #maybe everybody else is having the exact problems these posts are describing #but PERSONALLY it’s not that. it’s that this was unnecessary and out of nowhere and a cheap shot #after they did some very good work the rest of the show im NOT doing the same tired old shit #they managed to have tension and whatever around that history without it becoming cliche love triangle macho dude bullshit #and HERE WE ARE #why stick the landing when we could undo all of that at the last second? #ted lasso spoilers #i am going to become the joker #im too aromantic for this lmao my poor romance repulsed ass is not having a great week #‘it wasn’t even a REAL SERIOUS FIGHT’ i understand this is a dramedy and operates on comedy universe laws #and sometimes things are scaled appropriately but there was ripped clothing and blood lmfao #and they told her to Decide Who Gets Her #in no universe is any of that gonna fly with me no matter how it was resolved #after we managed to go 33 previous episodes WITHOUT DOING THIS SHIT

[sugarandice3]

Watching Tangled and I realized that I'm not as romance-repulsed as I thought I was...

#tangled #flynn ryder #romance #i dont usually want a romantic relationship or like the ones insee in the media but hot dawg #if i met flynn ryder i would fold immediately #like a cheap lawn chair

[possumteeths]

As someone who reads like a LOT of dumb romance books, one thing that ticks me off is that the authors always strive so hard for body diversity when it comes to ladies, but that courtesy is never given to the guys. All dudes are always described to be square jawed and muscled and very tall and like… its boring lol.

Its not woke or special to go out of your way to diversify women’s bodies and describe them to be different and then write 1018301 books with the same muscled beefcake abs upon abs motherfucker but like with different hair colors or something. Such emphasis on the lovely softness of plus size women, but then clear disgust for fat or softness when it comes to a guy. Sure. Alright. I hate it.

#Ruby dixon really loves the term ‘without an ounce of body fat’ to describe men and it drives me fuckin nuts #also the lack of body diversity in the men makes the body diversity in the women feel cheap #Also Im a sucker for height and bulk and i GET why its so common but like bigger gal? smaller guy??? is the HEIGHT of pairings lmao #Also i read a lot of monster romance and im often ticked off by the fact that it’s basically contemporary romance but with a man who is #green or something like ugh can we have some fucking MONSTER in the damn monster romance???? #Monsters bodies can be FREAKISH AND WEIRD #I WANT FREAKS GIMME FREAKS #Also like why must the man always be so strong lol like why do we need these romance book heroes to be olympic athletes #I want a weak cringefail idiot loser #Can the monster man be a dumb pathetic idiot for once PLS #Can i have PATHETIC #Can i have weird and unnerving and pathetic #gimme weirdos and freaks

[laptopcius]

For the first time in forever I got a chance to comb male love interest's hair 😭

#everyone say thank you Jester #I'm so happy I could combust #this scene was so cheap but so great #i loved every second of it #romance club #rc psi #ivo martin

[subspaceskater]

reading rules actually

#hasnt read anything more than cheap romance novels in a decade

[pleasantlyinsincere]

Brown/Gaines starting a Beatles book with Cyn walking in on John and Yoko having breakfast, is a choice and then their introductory descriptions of both women has been funny to me each time I start the book.

Cynthia Powell neither smoked nor drank. She was a proper girl with beautiful pale skin, blond hair, and limpid blue eyes, a girl so innocent she did not even listen to dirty jokes.

What an unlikely victor [Yoko] was for John affections. She was a grim, unsmiling woman, with a pale, oval face. At thirty-six she was eight years older than John and more than a little out of shape. Not what you's call a sex symbol.

I mean Gaines has never denied being friends with Cynthia but still... 🤣

#don't be so obvious dude #cheap romance novel vibes #“a girl so innocent she did not even listen to dirty jokes”🫣