I feel like I’ve been on a mediocrity kick lately.
And I’m on it rn because I’ve been chronically online for a few months and I’ve gotten to talk to irl people and now coming back to tumblr, twitter and tiktok, it’s made me realize how ridiculously curated and “pretty” and put-together shit online is. It’s exhausting to see.
Take a tiktok artist for example. They’re filming a quick video with a pretty filter, they’re adding one or two lines of finishing touched, they have a manicure, the song is perfect and when they show the drawing it’s perfect. But I don’t care about the false perception it perpetuates about how much work it takes to get to that point in art (We can talk about that another time).
What I really care about is how good it looks. How beautiful it is. How ethereal and supple and curated EVERYTHING in that video is. Yeah ofc humans love beauty and we love creating beautiful shit. I get it. There’s nothing wrong with that. But ugh, what’s bugging me is that we just put too much emphasis on that. And yes part of that is because of capitalism (or whatever the US has got going on lmao). But we’re also letting that seep into our actual beliefs. Like, I got people telling me they don’t want to film themselves doing art, or start a Sims tumblr (posting pics of their sims), cus they don’t know how to use photoshop, or they don’t have manicured acrylics (these are extremely specific examples, I know, lmao).
Again, there’s nothing wrong with creating beautiful things and curating shit to your liking.
But what I don’t like is that algorithms written by small groups of people influence us to the point that some of us are afraid to try things and show them to people because they’re constantly being bombarded with perfect version of the things they try getting love, and the people they show them to are also bombarded with it. So it has left no room for beginners, mistakes, different tastes or freedom of expression.
But to bring this quasi-5-paragraph essay to a close, embrace mediocrity. Be ok with being ok with stuff you try and produce. Cus like, when you get to the real world, you realize that no one really gives that much of a shit about extreme details and perfection and, even if they notice it, they overlook it.
What’s that quote? “The people who care don’t matter, and the people who matter, don’t care”
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Missing this beautiful smiley angel so much today 💕💕💕💕💕
This is my first year being in The Beatles fandom so this is the first time that this day has a special meaning to me. I have always been the type of person to get attached to anything really quickly if it makes me happy, and the four of them, but specifically George, is no different.
I feel like I can relate to George in a lot of ways. The more I listen to the things he would talk about, the more I understand that he felt certain ways about a lot of things that many of us think about now. As someone who was also raised Catholic and slowly stepped away from it and gained interest in spirituality, George's thought processes make a lot of sense to me, as someone who is starting to view the world through a very similar lens.
Had I been able to have the privilege of getting to meet George and talk with him, I have no doubt it probably would have been one of the best conversations I've ever had, as I find it somewhat difficult to always find people who understand what I'm talking about.
But seeing as George was a very spiritual person, I know that he's not completely gone and his soul is still very much alive. And I hope that wherever he is and wherever he chooses to go, he is happy and at peace.
George is an amazing and very special person to me. And I know it's only been a few months of me being a fan of his (and the Beatles), and yet he has already become one of my main sources of happiness.
I miss you so much, George 💕💕💕💕💕
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Lmao here's some more in which @oogaboogaspookyman 's little bastard son briefly experiences consequences for his actions and then is immediately like oh nvm this could be interesting.
Breaking point
Splashing. Struggling. She'd been swimming for who knows how long really, the blue expanse of the ocean seemed never ending and it was cold all around her. Her head slipped under the water and with more and more difficulty she surfaced to gasp and splutter. It wasn't right. She hadn't seen or heard a single Wingull or had a single fish Pokemon brush past or offer help. She slipped under swallowing water, gasping coughing when her head surfaced, her arms weakening heavy like lead and her legs she could barely kick them to keep going, but she had to, there must be an end to all this some buoy or piece of land she could stumble upon and grasp onto. Maybe a Wailord would finally see her and offer her a ride, surely something would save her. The water washed over her face once more as she sank, she weakly kicked, managing to get her snout above the water, snorting an exhale before slipping under once more before she could gather a breath. She sank deeper into the water the coldness numbing her body and holding her like a mock blanket, water pooled into her lungs heavily as she attempted to breathe choking without air trying to gasp but unable the pressure in her chest crushing and uncomfortable as her vision faded into blackness as she drowned in the unfeeling ocean.
Her body dropped heavily onto the gray floor still soaking wet she coughed with difficulty water splattering out her nose and mouth uncomfortably as she desperately tried to breathe. The dark tail of the other Mewtwo swayed in thought as he watched her struggling too weak to move, he put his foot under her shoulder and somewhere between a shove and a kick flipped her onto her side into somewhat of a recovery position before she choked. He heard her coughing, he sneered at the sound as water was forced from her lungs. He floated away casually leaving her to shiver and splutter on the floor placing down a timer next to some others with an amused sound.
"Do you know how long you were swimming for?"
He asked knowing she'd be too busy recovering to answer him really.
"Roughly 45 hours."
He answered himself. Looking over the timers.
"Its fascinating actually, when you believed help would finally find you or you'd find salvation you were able to swim much longer, when you didn't believe help would come and you let that hopelessness devour you well you barely managed to swim 30 hours, just a bit longer than the average human."
He seemed fascinated by the results as he talked about the average, statistics and what it all meant, though she was barely listening. She felt his foot pressing down on her head and skull as his voice came back into focus as he pushed down to the point she was whimpering in discomfort.
"You're a hope driven creature. I can't wait to see what happens when you succumb to despair."
He slowly removed his weight after smirking down at her, he floated away again. He'd been doing that a lot lately, leaving her to recover or leaving her all alone in general in the bleak stretching gray space with only the corpse of her brother as company.
After what felt like hours she pulled herself up enough to drag herself over to where her brother was splayed on the floor, he smelt putrid. His guts were spilled out along the gray floor, they'd darkened to black adding a twisted contrast of color to the place they were in. She moved to pull herself to kneel, her hands shook as she carefully lifted his upper frame, something cracked, ripped and squelched as she carefully put his head on her lap, his eye had fully rotten away now and the other was hanging out only connected by a few nerves, most of the flesh on his face had scarred or been ripped away revealing muscles and bones, a lot of his body was starting to rot to black. Though she suspected it was partly the fault of the demon and his blackened eyes. She held her baby brother one hand delicately resting on his forehead, careful not to rip away more of his fragile damaged skin, the other loosely wrapped around him resting over his chest. She barely recognised him really, the color had faded from him, she couldn't remember what he actually used to look like anymore. The past few cycles had mostly been without him and she feared what that meant. She hung her head as all she could do was hold her brother while she could, her upper body beginning to rock back and forth trying not to let the anguish get to her, she wouldn't let that demon see her cry anymore.
The white two watched them from a distance, she was cradling what was left of her brother again and rocking. Something that had started to annoy him. It was pitiful really and in a way that made him angry. Truthfully he'd been finding it difficult to reanimate the body into decent condition to put it into the loop, while at the beginning of the loop he is always technically alive the damage to his body by the end of each loop had become too vast, while he tormented May he had tried to undo some of the damages. When he'd sent him into the loop previously his wounds would be coated in a black sickly substance that pulled his injuries closed like stitches and engulfed him to undo wounds. Unfortunately now when he attempted to do so his efforts would quickly fall apart reverting the body back to its corpse state and it simply blackened his organs and blood further. It seems he'd broken that toy far too much. He should have considered the consequences of destroying him within each loop every time but well it had been too much fun playing rough with him he hadn't really thought, besides he didn't think they'd have been so entertaining for so long.
He glanced over at May, he hadn't actually killed her in any of the loops and despite the copious injuries and no doubt mental traumas she was fairing well, in that she wasn't rotting on the floor. Some of her wounds had even slowly healed, would they be there in the real world he wondered or only in this other space. He looks at the dead one again, perhaps he should release him back to before this all started and he created the loop and other space, Matt was it? Well whatever he was called he'd be back to a point of no injury and could simply be grabbed again from that point bring a 'new' so to speak unbroken toy into the loop to start again. He did create this whole space as a consequence free experiment after all, he could easily do it again and again.
Perhaps this time he could end May's life and torment the living Matt with his failure to save his sister who has fought for years to save him. Hm. Tempting. Though he got the impression he'd quickly grow bored with Matt, he was young with little to no real world experience, he was a blank canvas and not in a good way. He'd probably break and give up far too easily. He scoffed quietly to himself, well at least one of them remained entertaining. He floated over lazily to the others, he could hear May doing her annoying whimpering and whining, it was a strange throaty sound like trying not to cry. He stood behind her as she rocked either unaware of him or choosing to ignore him, he tsk'd to himself reaching a hand to pull the corpse from her.
"Let me look at it."
He felt the pain shoot up his arm before he even heard the growl, May's teeth were sinking into his flesh as she snarled, her eyes frenzied before she clamped her mouth further around his arm her head thrown upwards before tearing downwards ripping away a decent chunk of his pale flesh as his arm was freed and he flew backwards to examine the damage. The white flesh and slick black fluid of his blood hung from her mouth as she continued to snarl in his direction, he twisted his arm to look it over as his flesh around the area stretched and regrew closing his wound as he coldly glared at her, the most unusual part was her refusal to spit out the mouthful she had which he assumed should have been her first response after lashing out. He sneered at her and growled in return showing his fangs in threat as he watched in some surprise as she swallowed, his blood still dripping down her chin.
"Vile creature. Look at you. What you're becoming."
He mocked coldly, noticing her eyes didn't shift to shame remaining wild and glaring.
"Recollect your senses girl. I wasn't threatening your meal."
He smirked, expecting horror at what he was implying. She looked away from him and he felt victory wash over him turning his back to her to plan what to do in retaliation for her thoughtless actions. He heard her mumbling presumably apologies to her brother, maybe he could torment her with his puppeteered corpse. A snarl. He looked over his shoulder in time to dodge the glowing sharpened claw of her hand that just missed his face.
He flew back, turning to look at her, her form seemed disheveled as she stood hunched over her shoulders tense, head hanging low both her usually blunt feeble weak hands covered in bright sharp aura. Her head lifted slowly to look at him over the rim of her glasses, her pupils were shrunken and almost erratic giving her a manic kind of demeanor before she lunged for him again, surprisingly quick on her feet she swung to slash him with her claws. Normally he would've stood and taken the hit, despite the aura slash was a normal move and his ghost typing and abilities meant normal wouldn't hit him, but he leant away dodging her wild attempts to attack him. She'd lashed out at him during a cycle that's for sure and expected. But never here. It was fascinating to observe really, her expression reminding him of the violence committed by her possessed form. As well, she clearly must have known Slash wouldn't touch him from her past experiences in the cycles gone, she knows she'll receive a major beat down from him and no doubt punishment. So why use it?
He grunted as her forehead rammed forward into his lower chest and it sent him backwards until he could regain composure. That hit him. And it hurt. He could see blackness on her remaining horn, the injured one long since finally broken off. He glanced at himself, she'd managed to cut him with her horn during that attack, either headbutt or takedown. By the way she stood looking feral still and swaying on the spot idly watching him he assumed takedown. There's no way she should've been able to touch him. He observed her, as she watched him, he watched as she moved, pacing still hunched and wild acting more animal like than intelligent. Maybe he'd finally broken her too. He noticed after a few moments she was tricking him into moving, she was now pacing in front of her brother where before she paced in front of the stretching gray. She was guarding him.
He looked past her at the body, he closed a hand behind his back, darkness creeped and wrapped over the body covering him in blackness before dispersing leaving nothing behind. She didn't notice simply going for him again for daring to look at her brother, he sent flows of darkness like lightning to strike her down, it hit her dead on and she slid backwards on her feet across the floor with a scream of pain, her hand touched the floor in regaining balance before bolting for him again with surprising speed. He just missed her fist which slammed into the floor where she had intended to catch his face and slam him into it, before her tail caught his side in a swing. The weight and force of it pushed him backwards as he grabbed hold of her tail and sent another shock of darkness through her body accompanied by purple ghostly clawed hands that ripped scratched into her flesh and burrowed into her wiggling under her skin before burning out as she stumbled in the agony.
He grabbed her second neck as she stumbled, yanking her head backwards painfully as she cried out screaming, her wild demeanor and violence seeming to falter. He grinned, rattling her and shoving her to look at the empty spot on the floor.
"Now, look what you made me do."
He felt her still before she tried to look around frantically and he squeezed forcing her to be still.
"He's gone now. Because you couldn't behave."
He mocked. In reality Matt was simply gone from the other space existing once more before this all began to be grabbed again in better condition. He shoved her forward away from him as she tripped and fell to the floor, he watched her desperately pat around hoping her brother was there just invisible but nothing remained. With nothing to protect he suspected her powers would switch off again leaving her defenseless, and he intended to make her regret what she just did. Even if it had been extremely insightful and entertaining, a real look into the violence she was capable of outside of possession. Did it perhaps mean the behavior of the shadow version was simply using the aggression May suppressed and was an extension and outlet? And now with it gone she had to bear it herself? He'd figure it out eventually and maybe eventually bring her brother back into the loop for good behavior.
He observed her desperation in great joy watching her trembling, shaking, scrambling to find any trace or evidence her brother was secretly fine. She turned and glared at him once more, much to his surprise, it seemed she hadn't learnt her lesson. That's when he noticed sparks and crackling from her chest, as an extended hand shot out to grab him only stopped as darkness wrapped around her body coiling around her throat to choke and restraining her arms, her fingers brushed his snout as she attempted to grab him the darkness pulling her backwards as she pulled forward, her mega form resisting his powers in a tug of war.
"Where is my brother?! If you've killed him! If he's dead!" She struggled her sentences short with both extreme anger and from struggling against the dark tendrils pulling her backwards. He was almost impressed as she managed to pull herself forwards pulling against the overwhelming pulling ropes of darkness. But he knew she couldn't win as more wrapped around her pulling her tail, her chest, her waist tangling her legs and wrapping around her head to pull her backwards painfully so.
"You'll what?"
He mocked simply watching her slowly but surely be pulled backwards and downwards through the gray floor into a new cycle. But she met his gaze as she still fought.
"If he's gone." Her expression fell unusually dark. "Then you have nothing to stop me anymore." She looked directly at him as her body was pulled down, only her shoulder and head visible. "Do you." It wasn't a question, it was a statement. She met his eye even as he stepped on her and shoved her through the gray flooring into a new cycle of torment. Something in her eyes telling him that things had indeed changed, the mania and threat of violence he was met with as if she was challenging him, becoming worse than him. He simply grinned.
This could be very, very, interesting
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