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sierraraeck · 3 years

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The Better Kisser

BAU x Bi!Fem!Reader

Emily x Bi!Fem!Reader

Masterlist

Summary: After finding out that you haven’t had very many kissing experiences, the team realizes you’re the perfect candidate to judge who the best kisser on the team is.

Category: Fluff

Warnings: As you may have guessed, lots of kissing.

Word Count: 3.8k

A/N: Just a little something that popped into my head that I just needed to write. This is technically an AU where the members of the team are Hotch, Rossi, Spencer, Penelope, Derek, Emily, JJ, Luke, and Tara. Everyone is single.

It was true. You hadn’t kissed very many people. You decided long ago that it wasn’t really in the cards for you, dating and kissing and relationships, that is, so yeah. You weren’t what one would call an ‘experienced kisser.’ Your friends had teased you for it, but you’d always shrugged it off. It wasn’t something to be ashamed of.

You’d never thought it’d be something to be grateful for either, until tonight.

It’d been a long, hard case, and everyone was dying to get out of the stupid office, and away from those stupid files, so that you could all finally relax, maybe even have some fun. You’d only been with the team for about three months, and it was like an entire whirlwind throwing you this way and that. You also hadn’t gotten to know the team too well either, considering how busy you all constantly were. Your first week on the job, they went out for drinks after a case, but you were so exhausted that you left after the first round.

There hadn’t been time, or energy, since then for the team to spend quality, relaxed time together. That’s why tonight was extra exciting.

“You’re telling me that throughout all of highschool, all of college, you haven’t kissed more than two people?” Derek asked incredulously. You couldn’t fully remember how you’d all gotten onto the subject, except that you had. You were sitting on Garcia’s squishy couch, littered with colorful pillows and all sorts of stuffed animals. Garcia had decided that instead of going out to a bar, you were all going to go over to her place, minus Hotch and Rossi who tapped out early.

You shrugged. “Nope. I had one boyfriend and one drunk kiss, both of which were bad experiences for me. I’ve kind of avoided all of that since then.” You explained, “Plus, when would I have time for that? Between my college studies and getting into the FBI, then BAU, I didn’t really have free time.”

“I mean, sure, I guess,” Derek continued, “but come one. There had to be guys falling at your feet!”

You laughed. “Not all of us have that kind of draw, Derek.” He nudged you, and you nudged him back with a wink.

He was right, though. You were stunning. Even when you just put your hair up and wore sweatpants, there was just something about you. You would probably look good in a trash bag. But men were not just falling at your feet. Even if they were, you wouldn’t notice, putting all of your energy into chasing your dreams instead. You thought that was a very reasonable, and responsible, thing of you to do.

Plus, you’d done the whole boyfriend thing, and weren’t really interested in trying it again. Well, not as interested as you were in trying the whole girlfriend thing. And your first day on the job, a certain badass brunette caught your eye, and was even the first one to make you really feel like part of the team. You were finding it harder and harder to resist her pull.

“Yeah Derek,” JJ chimed in, drawing your attention back to the conversation, “Not all of us can rack up eight phone numbers and five make out sessions in one night.”

“What can I say?” Derek beamed, pride shining in his eyes. “I’m a great kisser.” Emily snorted. When Derek glared at her, she pressed her lips together and looked down. “What?”

“Nothing,” Emily sang, shaking her head with an air of mischief.

“No seriously, what?”

“It’s just that if you read girls half as well as you claim to, you might wonder if that’s always the case.” Derek’s jaw hung open, and Emily smirked at him with unabashed confidence. You stared at her and her piercing eyes, and you couldn’t help but admire how sexy she was when she was confident, smug even.

“Wow, you’re gonna go there?” Derek asked, feigning hurt disbelief, “And how would you know that?”

Again, Emily shrugged and nonchalantly stated, “Because I know how women act when they kiss me. And trust me. They’re actually enjoying themselves.”

Some ‘ooh’s radiated throughout the room, and based on the look Penelope had plastered to her face, things were about to get good.

You watched in amusement as Derek sat up a little straighter, “Is that a challenge?”

“If you want it to be.” Emily’s brows shot up.

“Alright, you’re on,” Derek nodded, determination radiating off of him.

“Well, I don’t know how strong either of your games are,” Luke spoke up, glancing quickly over at Spencer who was just observing the whole encounter, “but I think I could take on both of you.”

“No you could not,” Tara sneered from beside him.

“And you could?” Luke challenged.

Setting her glass down, Tara replied, “Yes.”

You giggled at the thought of the four of them having a kiss-off, just imagining how utterly chaotic that would be due to all of their extraordinarily competitive natures.

“Oh my god, this is going to be so fun!” Penelope squealed. “Now we just have to figure out who’s going to judge!”

“We can’t really use one of us because some people might be biased or recognize the kisser,” Emily casually stated. It took a moment for you to realize what she’d just admitted to. Who on the team has kissed before? But before you could really start thinking about it, you noticed that everyone’s gaze had slowly turned to you.

“What is happening right now?” you questioned, looked between them.

The five of them exchanged excited, knowing looks before training their attention back on you. Then you got it. “Are you serious?”

“You’re the only one who hasn’t kissed one of us!” Derek explained, as if it were obvious.

“You mean…” you trailed off, but again couldn’t complete the thought before someone interrupted.

“Come on, it’ll be fun!” Penelope promised. “And you seem like you’d be a very neutral judge.”

“Not to mention,” Tara added, “You’re a pretty blank slate since you haven’t really kissed anyone.”

“Don’t worry though, we’ll show you a good time,” Derek assured with a wink.

Heads nodded. You were a bit worried that there would be some hurt feelings by the end of this, but they were all adults, and the appeal to kiss all of them, along with their eager faces, became enough to convince you to say yes.

“Yes!” Derek exclaimed. He looked pointedly at Emily, “It is so on.”

She just rolled her eyes. “Pen, do you have a blindfold?”

“A what?” you asked.

“Well we can’t have you getting biased on us. This has to be strictly about kissing.” Hearing her explain it with such reason hampered your growing nerves a bit. Like you’d said, you hadn’t kissed very many people and you were worried how much better they were going to be at it than you.

You reminded yourself that this was more about them than you, and tried to use that to calm yourself down. You were about to be kissed by some of the most attractive people you’d met. This was definitely not a bad place to be.

While Penelope rummaged through her belongings to get a makeshift blindfold, Luke convinced Spencer to join and JJ decided to participate.

Pretty soon, they had you seated in a chair, another one across from you, waiting for whoever was going to go first, while Emily explained some ground rules. “We are going to go in rounds. We will each kiss her and then after every round, Y/N will eliminate one of us based on the number in the round we kissed her so she doesn’t know who it is. No touching. You can’t use your hands in any way, this has to purely be about the kiss. And kiss however you normally would, no matter what that means for you.”

“No hands?” Spencer questioned. You were still surprised that he’d agreed to join, let alone ask a question like that. Luke gave him an odd look from behind while Emily confirmed the rule.

“Your hands might give away who you are, and again, this is just about the kiss.”

“Alright, alright, let’s just get started,” Derek complained, as Penelope tied the blindfold behind your head.

Now that you couldn’t see, you relied on your hearing to figure out what was happening. You heard some shuffling and disgruntled whispering, then you heard the chair across from you slide across the floor toward you. You waited anxiously as the person leaned in and pressed their lips to yours.

Their lips were plush and soft, but the kiss seemed a little too forced. It was a bit excited and you could feel their smile as they started pulling away. It was a pretty good kiss, definitely better than your previous two, despite the fact that it only lasted a few seconds. You couldn’t help but try and guess who it was, thinking it was either Penelope or Tara.

The next person who sat down completely blew the person before them out of the water. It was a much longer kiss and the person even swiped their tongue across your bottom lip for entry. You weren’t really thinking as you gave them access, the heat in your body starting to rise. You just hoped that your face wasn’t giving any of that heat away, so you were almost grateful that the person pulled away.

There was a bout of silence, which made you feel a little awkward, but soon enough, you heard the cushion squish down across from you. Their knee knocked yours, as you assumed they crossed their legs. Being a profiler, you were very used to picking up on body language with your eyes, making it kind of fun to try and pick up those same behavioral cues with all of your other senses. This person, you could tell, was very hesitant. You couldn’t say you were surprised when the person really only pecked you on the lips.

Number four in the line up started out pretty good, but you felt them start shaking or something halfway through. You quickly realized that they were laughing and you pulled back. You couldn’t help but smile when you asked, “Why are you laughing?”

Up until then, they had laughed pretty silently, but once you called them out, they just full out chuckled. “I’m sorry!” Tara unapologetically said through more laughs. “I couldn’t help it. I blame Luke.”

You laughed with her as you playfully shook your head. “You were doing so well up until then!”

“I know!” she agreed.

“I guess this means you’re out?” you half questioned.

Tara gave an over dramatic sigh, but you could hear the smile in her voice as she stated, “I guess so.” As she walked away, Luke gave a small ‘ow,’ and you assumed she’d hit him. You wondered what about this was Luke’s fault? Had he said something to her?

Either way, someone took her spot across from you. They wasted no time leaning in and putting their lips on yours. The kiss started out slow and gentle, like they were easing you into it. But gradually, as you both became more used to the other, it picked up pace, your mouths starting to move in sync. It felt like all of their energy was focused on you and exploring your mouth with their tongue. It was by far the most passionate kiss you’d experienced, and you tried to hide the pout from your face as they pulled back, chasing their lips for only a second before remembering there was an audience, and a competition.

Person number six was … good. You couldn’t really describe it. They used, what now seemed to you to be, a medium amount of tongue, for a medium amount of time. It was a good kiss, you weren’t saying it wasn’t, it just didn’t have any quirk or something unique that stood out. It was just … good. You knew Tara was out, so you tried to guess who that person could be. You thought maybe JJ, or possibly Luke, but you couldn’t be sure.

The final person who kissed you was intense. They had plump, captivating lips, but the way they kissed verged on overwhelming. They were also a little sloppy in their movements, and it was like you could tell they weren’t fully invested. Distracted, maybe? Again, not bad, but nothing like some of the other kissers.

The air was hot and heavy as Emily spoke up. “Okay, we’ve all gone. You know Tara is out, she was number four, so who else from this round would you eliminate?”

You pretended to think about it, even though it actually wasn’t that hard to pick. “I think it was person number three.” The person who just sort of pecked me, you thought, but didn’t say.

The players were now down to five, and they went in the same order as they had before, minus person number three, who you guessed was Spencer, and Tara.

This round made you even more confused about who was who than the round before. The excited one you guessed was either Luke or Penelope, the intimate one you thought was Derek, the passionate one you thought was either Luke or Emily, the average one you thought was JJ, and the sloppy, intense one you had no idea about.

By the end of that round, you eliminated person number one, the overly excited, verging on too hard kisser.

The next round was a no brainer. The intimate kisser, Derek you thought, upped his game. He kissed you for longer, used a bit more tongue, but was still somehow gentle. If you thought he’d upped his game, you weren’t prepared for person number two. They also upped their game, keeping your mouths molded together for longer than before, something you were more than happy about. You couldn’t quite place exactly what it was about their kiss, maybe that it seemed so perfectly balanced, incorporated the perfect amount of everything, or something else, but they were absolutely magnetic. It sent electric waves through your body, making you feel a little tingly. You felt sort of bad for the average kisser, most likely JJ, because they had to follow that up. And finally the sloppy kisser, who you still couldn’t place. They didn’t up their game at all. If anything, they felt more distracted by the minute, and pulled away earlier than the rest.

“Person number four,” you stated when Tara asked who was getting eliminated.

It was now down to three; the intimate kisser, you predicted Derek, the passionate kisser, either Luke or Emily, and the average kisser, probably JJ.

There was some shuffling, a faint whispering, a small ‘ow,’ and then Tara spoke up again. “Now that there are only three left, as long as you are okay with it, they want to use their hands.”

You tried to downplay the excitement you were feeling with this new rule, but you were sure their trained ears could hear it in the way you said, “Yes, that’s good with me.”

The seat across from you suddenly became occupied, but before anything could happen, Tara quickly jumped in. “Wait. Y/N, you can’t use your hands.” When you pouted a little, she explained, “Well if you did, you’d definitely know who is who, so…”

You sighed, but agreed, waiting in anticipation for the person across from you to touch you.

It started soft, their long fingers brushing over your cheeks as they leaned in. Soon enough, though, the entirety of their hands were firmly cupping your face and pulling you ridiculously close, close enough to feel some of their body heat. It was intimate, and again made you feel like the most important person to whoever those lips and hands belonged to. You rubbed your thumb into your palm, wanting nothing more than to reach out and touch them, but you knew you couldn’t. Your sole focus was on them, them on you, and you had to say it was one of the best kisses of the night.

That person made you feel like the most important person in the world, but the next person kissed you like you were the only person in the world. They started out by tucking your hair behind your ear, then slowly sliding their fingers back into the loose strands. As they started to kiss you, they moved their other hand behind your head, cradling the back of your neck. The person before them had captured your focus, but this person erased any thoughts your mind was capable of forming. You couldn’t think about anything other than the way their tongue moved against yours, and the shiver they sent down your spine as one of their hands traveled the length of it, coming to rest just above your hip, strong, confident fingers pulling you closer. It was a moment you never wanted to end, and one that left you in a cold shock when it eventually did.

You almost didn’t even want the last person to kiss you because of how you knew it would never come close to what you’d just experienced, but a competition was a competition. The third person kissed you similarly to how they’d done before, good but nothing special, their hands resting comfortably on your hips.

When it was all over, you asked, “Can I take off the blindfold now? I know who the winner is.”

“Sure, but announce who first,” Tara suggested.

“Okay,” you agreed. “The third person got third, the first person got second, and the second person was the winner. Can I take the blindfold off now?” you asked again. You were eager to find out who was who. When you didn’t get an immediate response warning you not to, you stood up and quickly ripped it off to quite the amusing sight. Spencer looked as bright as a cherry, Penelope looked shocked but proud, Tara was smirking, Luke’s eyes were the size of beach balls, JJ looked indifferent, Emily was smirking, and Derek looked like he’d just been shot. “So are you going to tell me who was who?”

Without answering, Emily took two large strides toward you and placed her lips back on yours. One of her hands slid back into your hair while the other rested above your waist, and you smiled into the kiss. Of course it was you, you thought. When she pulled away, you were both smiling like idiots, and she gave you a single eyebrow raise as you both turned to look at Derek.

“I got third?” he asked, still in a state of bewilderment.

“What?” you asked, just as shocked as he was. “I thought you got second.”

Emily snorted. “You thought Spencer was Derek?”

What?! You spun to face Spencer, the person you were sure got out the first round, and he was still blushing like he’d been out in the sun for far too long. “You took second?” He nodded nervously. You beamed at him, causing him to return a shy smile, then look down at his fiddling hands. “You’re a really good kisser,” you complimented.

Derek repeated, “I took third? Emily, I guess I kinda get,” she rolled her eyes at that, “but Pretty Boy?”

You shrugged, and Luke jumped in, though not nearly as harsh as Derek had been. “Yeah, I took fourth, but Spencer got second?”

You offered him a cheeky smile, remembering how distracted he felt while kissing you, and the not-so-subtle glances he constantly made at Spencer all the time. You took the opportunity to encourage whatever was going on there. “He did. Like I said, he’s a good kisser. Very intimate, like I was the only one on his mind. You should try kissing him sometime. Might help you feel less distracted.” You winked and Spencer looked like he wanted to evaporate. Luke, on the other hand, was just staring at Spencer, and you could see the gears spinning in his head. He finally mumbled a ‘what the hell’ before pulling Spencer to him by the back of his neck. Spencer seemed immediately surprised, but recovered quite quickly, no hesitation to his movements after the initial shock. They kissed each other probably exactly how they’d just kissed you, Spencer’s hands cupping Luke’s face, Luke’s hands resting on the back of Spencer’s neck and lower back. Although, you’d have to say that Luke looked a bit more focused than he’d been with you. You laughed while some of the other members hooted. This was something that’d been a long time coming.

When they pulled away, Luke nodded. “Y/N, I definitely agree with you.”

Spencer smiled, and playfully nudged Luke as he said, “Y/N, I also agree with you.”

“Hey!” Luke exclaimed, but he was smiling the brightest he had in a while.

Derek was still a mess, not enjoying the moment as much as he usually would’ve, and asked, “What did I do wrong?”

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” you assured, “You’re a good kisser, but there’s just nothing too special about it. It’s kinda just…”

Emily and Derek looked at you expectantly before Emily got it. “Wait. Are you calling him average?”

She looked way too excited for the occasion, but she was right. He was just kinda average. You nonchalantly admitted, “I guess.”

Derek let his hands fall to his sides with a slap, his mouth still hanging open. Emily’s lips curled up into a sly smile as she placed a hand on Derek’s shoulder. “It’s okay. Not everyone can be as good as me.” He shrugged her hand off his shoulder, and she held out her hand. Derek reached into his back pocket producing his wallet, and grudgingly slapped a crumpled $20 into her open palm. You gawked at them, not realizing that they’d placed a bet on their skills.

Emily returned to your side, closer than she’d really ever stood to you before, and gave you a smile that seemed on the shyer side for her, biting her lip as she peered at you through her lashes. You mirrored her shy smile, pressing your lips together as heat quickly spread to your cheeks. You turned back to the rest of the conversation that demanded your attention, people wanting to know why you eliminated them. But you couldn’t help glancing over at Emily every now and then, and couldn’t hide your joy when you saw that she was gazing back.

Who knows? Maybe that night was going to be the start of two great relationships in the BAU.

@90spumkin

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facets-and-rainbows · 4 years

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Blue Exorcist 10th anniversary book Q&A session

The 10th anniversary book has a section where Katoh answers 100 questions submitted by fans on Twitter, so here they are translated/paraphrased! May contain manga spoilers up to the recent flashback arc, so be warned.

(Note that I’m playing it very fast and loose here because there are A HUNDRED OF THEM, so not exact wordings, but it should capture the gist. Lemme know if there are any you want elaborated on)

1. Katoh likes the feel of traditional drawing more than digital but is impressed with how far digital has come

2. Meph THOROUGHLY ABUSES spacetime to watch all his shows and ensure that he gets all the merch he wants

3. Did the girls take all of Yukio’s school uniform buttons in middle school? Yes, they did (apparently it’s like A Thing for girls to ask for a button from their crush at middle school graduation, based on some sad movie from the 60s where a guy who got drafted as a kamikaze pilot gave a girl one of his uniform buttons to remember him by)

4. Rin's tail is about a meter long

5. There are tons of servants working at Mephisto's mansion. Belial is in charge of them

6. Katoh borrows from all sorts of neat real locations when making settings

7. Katoh identifies with pretty much all the characters the most! Except Lucifer.

8. Demon designs she's proud of include the impure king and hachirou, pretty much anything that was the main one in an arc

9. Katoh lists a bunch of her favorite musical artists/music she’s listening to recently: King Gnu, Official Hige Dandism, Kenshi Yonezu, BAD HOP, Sakanaction, Keyakizaka 46, Hypnosis Mic, Aimer, B’Z, Queen Bee.

10. Awww the rabbit manga that characters are often reading isn't just Robo to Usakichi, it's an even older one that she drew as a little kid

11. She likes industrial style interior designs

12. Rin and Yukio alternated who got the top bunk growing up, because they couldn't agree on it lol

13. Katoh cares a whole lot about panel layouts and speech bubble positions, might even be her favorite part of the process (it shows!)

4. Katoh does NOT have a mashou, lol

15. Rin has probably been practicing in secret so he can learn to carry stuff with his tail

16. Izumo probably got into shojo manga around 1st grade, her mom had some around the house

17. Specialty dishes: Rin - lots of stuff but especially nabe Yuri - stuff you can throw together quickly Shiro - stuff he learned from Yuri and/or cookbooks, alongside teaching Rin Yukio - Does. Not. Cook.

18. Can't pick a favorite place she's been on research, but there's no place like Japan

19. Kinzou's band isn't currently meeting because demons, but he's probably still thinking of new songs

20. Hardest characters to draw: anyone with detailed flowing hair. Hardest to write for: Lightning and Gedouin. She had to go read books about serial killers specifically for material for Gedouin, lol

21. Suguro actually gets a dorm room to himself, though allegedly Yukio is technically assigned as his roommate, lol. Didn't end up that way what with Yukio being a teacher and also Rin’s whole...situation

22. Shiemi makes some of her own hair accessories! Cute

23. Katoh doesn't mind if you include stuff with fan letters but check with the editor first

24. Time for making each chapter: Planning/storyboarding: 1-5 days. Sketching: 3-5 days. Drawing/inking: the rest. Just...the rest of the time

25. Neither Suguro nor Izumo have dated before and neither is currently dating. But that's probably just because things were hectic for them! It could happen

26. Yukio breaks 5 or 6 pairs of glasses a year, someone get this kid a strap or something

27. How many spare glasses does Yukio have? Check the fanbook lol it's in there (dang it Katoh)

28. The demon she wants us to pay the most attention to is Lucifer. Because plot.

29. What's under the Order's big meeting table? It's a BOTTOMLESS PIT and if you fall in it you DIE that's what makes it COOL (laughs)

30. What are the job requirements for the angelic legion? Literally just Arthur liking you and inviting you to join

31. She WANTS to do more character profiles but just hasn't gotten to it

32. Rin's tail feels like a cat tail, texture wise

33. The "red Assiah fire" is literally just actual fire nothing special

34. Rin's current hair color is light blue fading to white at the ends

35. Thoughts on Rin's growth: she likes that he stays positive in awful situations and she also thinks it's very main character of him to face the past instead of avoiding it

36. Mephisto didn't purposely surround Rin with stuffed animals when he woke up after going crispy. Mephisto's bed is just Like That

37. Kurikara was based on a cool sword she found in a sword book, but that one was technically just a ceremonial sword. The symbol on it us a Sanskrit letter kaan (sp?) associated with Fudou Myouou

38. Kuro can communicate with normal cats and hangs out with them often

39. Sometimes Shiemi's skirt is extra fancy around the hem what's up with that? Apparently it's an optional accessory that comes with the skirts help I haven't noticed this and don't know any fashion terms in any language

40. When coloring, Katoh always tries to have an overall theme in mind ("emphasis on blue" etc) so it comes together in the end

41. Yes the twins are genetically related to Shiro because of Goro (she says they're like his nephews but I say GENETICALLY at least they'd be indistinguishable from his children)

42. Strongest mom of all the strong moms around here? Yuri! Did you SEE her give birth??

43. Are you careful about your own health Katoh-sensei? Not particularly! Her mom has had to bring her food at work sometimes! Don't do this at home kids

44. At the dating events Shura goes to, does she drink cocktails in moderation? Yeah, she probably downplays her normal drinking habits at these things. But normally she's down for just about any kind of drink

45. Lucifer just really likes oysters okay

46. How many pages of manga does Katoh draw in a day? If she's being good about self-care: three. Maximum number ever: TEN

47. Mephisto is one of those folks who can eat like a garbage compactor and never gain weight. Possibly because his body resists that sort of change the same way it resists aging etc

48. First food Rin cooked: fish burger type patty. Yukio's favorite things Rin cooks: fish simmered in soy sauce, yellowtail with daikon radish. It's fish all the way down

49: Did Rin ever get more monthly allowance from Mephisto? It doubled! He gets TWO 2000 yen bills now (rip) [T/N: That's uh, that's USD $37.26 a month or 33.10 euro]

50. Why isn't Rin more popular with the girls? He gets nervous talking to them, plus he's too oblivious to notice even if he DID have some fans

51. Why change Suguro's hair? She gets bored with keeping everything the same, and she wanted a visual representation that he was getting serious and going into kind of a training arc

52. Things Katoh pays extra attention to when drawing: trying to capture the feel of whatever she's drawing (like "that looks warm and soft" or "I bet that guy stinks" cough Lightning cough)

53: Does Rin take after Yuri more? (He's got her eyes!) Katoh tried to draw Yuri so she looks like both twins. Personality, too - Yukio has her smarts and Rin has her optimism

54: Do you ever wanna be like Mephisto? Well she'd like to be able to get away with just ANYTHING EVER, but no, let's not be like Mephisto

55. Konekomaru not only carries around a cat toy in case he meets any cats, he MAKES cat toys to carry around based on what he thinks the cats would like

56. How'd you come up with Shima? Go read the fan book!

57. Do the kids have Twitter/Instagram accounts? Rin - probably not. Konekomaru might be on some social media. Paku and Izumo are totally on instagram

58. Is there something Rin makes that you wish you could try? All of it! That's the whole idea! He's good at cooking!

59. Will we ever have a (G-rated) reveal of what ALL of Mamushi and her family's tattoos look like? Maybe! She'll think about it

60. Does Arthur have a repertoire of different hairstyles? Not really, he just puts some of it up on the top. Heck he might even have people to do that for him

61. If you wrote a shojo manga what would it be about? She'd have to do a lot of research before even coming up with a story, since there are so many style differences between the genres aside from just the subject

62. The other two of Mephisto's top 3 favorite foods: Cup ramen and....f-fried bubblegum?? Is that a THING???

63. Where do you start when drawing a character? Usually the outline of their face but if it's a complex pose/composition she'll start with whatever's in the foreground (like hands)

64. If Katoh could have a familiar, what demon would she choose? Mephisto. As the all-powerful author, she might actually be able to command him as a familiar!

66. If you swapped Yukio and Rin's relationship around what would change? not much, you'd pretty much have Rin going to the Illuminati and Yukio going to the past

67. Top 3 foods/souvenirs to try in Kyushu? Well she doesn't know what’s good CURRENTLY but when she was there she always used to like burdock tempura udon, hakata torimon (a kind of manju with white bean paste inside), and Chikae style cod roe. today I learned Katoh went to high school in Kyushu

68. Katoh listens to music a lot while she's storyboarding, then when she and the assistants are all drawing and inking they put various videos/movies and stuff on in the background

69. For all his hitting on girls, is Shima actually popular with the ladies at all? He's got enough girls in his life that he probably COULD find a girlfriend if he really wanted, but the double agent thing tends to get in the way. He still wouldn't be as popular as Yukio though (side thought/translator’s note: Shima would be proud of being number 69.)

70. Katoh has the ending planned out in a big-picture way, but there are still a few details here and there that she's fretting over

71. It's cute when the boys put their ties over their shoulders when they're working on something! Where'd that come from? She just figured a tie might get in the way and that seemed like a realistic way to get it out of the way

72. Looks like Yukio is getting some facial hair! What about Rin? They're both about the age for it, but maybe Rin can't grow a beard yet. Maybe a little peach fuzz here and there

73. Katoh's favorite blue exorcist merch? There were some exorcist licenses a while back, and the exorcist pins. Basically it's really cool that these little accessories she drew ACTUALLY EXIST NOW, LIKE YOU CAN HOLD THEM IN YOUR HANDS

74. Okay realtalk how long do we have left, I don't want the series to end yet? We're solidly in the second half by now but it's not, like, ABOUT to end yet

75. Katoh would be a Knight meister, based on what characters she likes to play in games and such

76. How many people in the whole exorcism cram school? More than you think! She doesn't give a number but apparently licensed exorcists also attend classes for new meisters, etc, so there's a wide age range attending

77. How's Arthur feel about, like, studying Taming on the way to becoming Paladin? He's at least mostly accepted that you have to use demons to fight demons effectively

78. Konekomaru started wearing glasses in his first year of middle school, so like 7th grade (more recent than I thought!) He has one spare pair, in contrast to Yukio lol

79. Katoh's current obsessions? Ghost/scary stories! She's even been going to live readings of them recently

80. Media Katoh consumes for inspiration? A wide range of foreign teen drama, horror/suspense, shojo manga, light novels, anime, etc. Special focus on things where two boys are in conflict or there are brothers involved

81. If they weren't exorcists what jobs would they have? Rin - chef. Yukio - doctor. Shiemi - uh, florist?

82. Inspiration for the design of True Cross Town? Katoh and her assistants gathered up a bunch of references, picked out stuff they felt matched the tone, and mashed them all up together

83. Did you use any references etc for the school/exorcist uniforms? She says she probably should have but she just kind of made them up before publication

84. Favorite part of drawing? For color pages, picking out a color scheme. For black and white, drawing in all the little details (though she doesn't always get time to lately)

85. Once again confirms the demon kings' weird hair is a representation of their horns. ADDS THAT PEOPLE WHO CAN'T SEE DEMONS CAN'T SEE THE WEIRD HAIR

86. Now that Yukio's at the Illuminati, where's he gonna get his Jump SQ and spare glasses? Well he probably never planned to stay for long, but hey it's a big ship and they might have an optometrist and/or newsstand there

87. Do you base the demon characters on any references etc? Not really, she just gets a general idea of popular demon designs and then makes up her own in her own style

88. Merchandise Katoh personally wants to have made: stuff that an adult could just use in their day to day life. Also, it's not gonna happen, but if her favorite figure brand made AoEx figures she could die happy

89. If Beelzebub's host body was a beautiful woman, how would Shima react? Would the womanizing win out over the bug phobia? Katoh replies that Shima would probably just faint from being near a girl that pretty, before the bugs even got involved

90. Will the twins ever get to smile and eat dinner together again?? We'll just have to wait and see!

91. What do you check at a "scenario check"? what's a scenario check man I dunno They check for people being out of character or the setting feeling off. They had a lot of these checks for the anime, but they also do them for the drama CD, games, and all that other stuff where multiple authors are involved

92. Why does Shura use baldy as an insult for people who are clearly not bald? She feels like they have some kind of metaphorical, mental kind of "baldness" and she's calling them out on it. Whatever that means

93. After Blue Exorcist ends, what do you want to draw next? She has SO MANY IDEAS, SO MANY

94. Did Katoh make up the Shinto chants that, for example, Izumo used against Gedouin? They're assembled from bits of actual Shinto prayers according to what feels right in the scene

95. Yukio reads the Jump SQ, right, and, just hear me out here, he likes gag manga, right? Does this mean he reads Salaryman Yukio? It's something he would read, but let's say that in the AoEx universe there's just a very similar manga that he finds oddly relatable

96. What do Yukio and Shima do in their free time on the Dominus Liminus? oh my god you guys this ship has so many amenities. Yukio probably spends time reading in the library, which they totally have. There's also, like, a gym, and a movie theater, and a THEATER theater, all of which are free. Shima probably hangs out at the pool (!) and goes to the movies, and hits on illuminati girls, lol

97. Easiest character to draw? The ones with boring simple hair, lol. Lightning gets an honorable mention for ALSO not having eyes in most shots, but Rin wins--he was specifically designed to be easy for Katoh to draw because that's what you want in your main character

98. How do demons understand gender? They just possess whatever feels like the best match to how they feel in Gehenna, whether that's a man, or a woman, or a rat, or whatever

99. Where do you start when you're coming up with a story? She starts with character design and how the characters relate to each other. Currently she's just continuing an existing story, so she works on splitting up the overall plot into episodes and fleshing it out with scenes and information about characters

100. When do you feel most happy? She honestly feels like she lives a very happy life overall. Mentions noticing a lot of little things, like how nice her cats' heads smell when she cuddles them or taking a nice cold refreshing drink of water. There's happiness in everything. aww.

#blue exorcist #interview #Ao no Exorcist #translation

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ficforce · 3 years

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Blind Spot Part 1

Obi x Reader Stalker trigger

Obi stopped mid-lift as he heard the sound of three women getting angry all at once, it could only mean that Y/N had come back from her date and that it hadn’t gone well. He grabbed a towel and wiped at his face before opening the door and heading toward the break room; Iris looked mildly scandalised whilst Tamaki and Maki looked ready to commit murder, Y/N stood in front of them looking a little disappointed. “So he just grabbed your butt and expected you to go home with him? What a pervert!” “You have the worst luck with that dating company, why can’t you find your prince charming already?” Maki looked close to tears and sat down as if defeated. Y/N pat her on the shoulder and then she realised Obi was stood in the doorway, he looked a little sweaty but she recognised the bright look in his eyes, he always got a good feeling after working out, “You called it, Captain. Another loser crossed off the list.” “Did you update your dating profile?” He wasn’t going to gloat, he hadn’t liked the guy’s profile when she showed him and he felt worse about it if the guy had touched her without her wanting him to, “What did you put in for your ideal match?” She sat down beside Maki and began counting off the points on her fingers, “Tall, fit, kind, fun. Adventurous, looking for a long term commitment, preferably someone in a similar line of work.” Sister Iris shook her head a little and exhaled, “Why don’t you just put in a picture of Captain Obi in that section?” Tamaki covered her mouth so she wouldn’t laugh out loud and Maki looked at the two hopefully. It wasn’t the first time someone had told Y/N that she and Obi would be a great match.

“Tall, check” Maki ticked off an imaginary box, “No ones more fitness mad than Captain, check.” Iris joined in then, getting up her own imaginary checklist, “Kind and fun, check. Adventurous… let’s just check that.” Tamaki pretended to grab Iris’ list, “Pretty sure Captain Obi said he’d only date for keeps, check. And he’s in the same line of work. Check, check and check!” The three of them looked at them excitedly, Obi rubbed the back of his head and fumbled with his words for a moment, eventually coming up with some excuse, “We’ve been friends for nearly ten years, I think if there was anything between us it would have happened by now, right, Y/N?” “And you’re my boss now,” she gave a shrug to the girls and sat down at the end of the table, still disappointed by the evening’s date. Y/N had always dreamed of a prince charging into her life one day, sweeping her off her feet and loving her until the end of time, she felt like she was running out of time now, she was nearly thirty and still hadn’t had a long, meaningful relationship. She wondered if Mr Right would ever find her… Feeling a warm hand on her shoulder she looked up at Obi and he gave her a soft smile, “You’ll find a guy who ticks all the boxes, you just need to relax a little more. How about I set you up with Hinawa?” “Great idea!” Y/N cheered, “Then I can borrow his gun to shoot you with!” Obi snorted and headed out to hit the showers, oblivious to Y/N watching him as he left, her eyes lingering on his muscled back until she heard giggling from the side, “What?!” The women couldn’t believe how oblivious the two were of their feelings. The next two dates were just as disastrous and put the usually cheery woman in a bad mood. She was almost grateful for the difficulty of their mission as it let her work out some frustration, Obi pulled her up out of the elevator shaft they had used to escape a collapse lower down and she made sure to adjust his hood when she noticed it coming loose - neither of them had fire abilities and made sure to check the other’s equipment. It was something they had done even when they were regular firefighters, they had been in some difficult firefights and they always tried to find something to laugh about at the end; it kept them sane. They had gotten separated from everyone else when two Infernals had flanked the team, “The floor’s weak here, watch your step, Ak- Obi.” Y/N still wasn’t used to calling him Captain or Obi after years of casual friendship calling each other by first names. They made their way through the building until they found the stairs, the fires were blazing hot and they rushed down the stairs to where they could hear fighting, a screech of metal made Y/N scream as the stairs sunk dangerously under their feet, she balanced herself in time but she saw Obi go over the side of the broken rail. “Akitaru!” She launched herself toward him and barely caught his wrist before he vanished - he was so heavy it was hard not to be pulled over too, “Come on, little help here…” Obi caught the edge of the stairs with his other hand and began to pull himself back up, the woman gripping his coat and belt to help him all the way, “Thanks…” he gave her shoulder a grateful squeeze, “Let’s keep going, stay alert.” The Captain took her hand without thinking and they made their way through the inferno together, it was early dawn by the time they had finished putting the Infernals to rest and Y/N’s head drooped as she fought off sleep, eventually her head dropped onto Obi’s shoulder and he opened one of his eyes to look down at her, a smile flitted over his lips as she let out a mumble. He closed his eye again and relaxed a little, there was still some driving to do before they got back to the station so he would have to enjoy this as much as he could. They’d been friends for as long as he could remember and part of him regretted that he wasn’t her prince charming… they had never even had a moment where he thought he could kiss her and she would respond favourably - perhaps he was a coward? He had told the girls what he

honestly thought, ‘if there was anything between them it would have happened by now.’ It ached every time she described her ideal man but overlooked him. Obi wanted her to be happy and if that meant helping her out before every date she had with a stranger then he would take it on the chin. — - “I give up!” Y/N announced and tossed her jacket over Vulcan’s workbench, “Vul, I need something to hit - gimme a job to do.” She pulled him out from under the matchbox, not too surprised by his animal-themed goggles but they made her laugh, “You’re so cute…” “I’m a star-nosed mole.” The redhead pointed over to a different bench, “The hubcap got a little banged up, wanna hammer it back into shape?” She passed him a bottle of water and the young man pulled his goggles off, he saw Y/N like a kind of mother but even he had to admit she looked good in her date outfit, “Didn’t it go well?” She shook her head, “It was fine at first but then he started talking about himself and it was way different than his profile, then he kept changing his story and I just got this… feeling about him. He was hot as hell but I started to really go off him by dessert.” Y/N took a breath, “You know how you said Dr Giovanni made even your bones feel creeped out - he was like that.” A little time passed with the two working away and then they were interrupted by Hinawa, the Lieutenant’s wide eyes landed on Y/N and she flinched, “…Um?” “Your date called the station, he wanted to know if you got home safe.” He would have gone on to lecture her on the proper use of the work phone but the ex-soldier paused when he saw her expression change, it was obvious the news wasn’t welcome. “Y/N?” “I didn’t tell him where I worked… I said I was in Emergency Services and there’s nothing on me to indicate I work here.” Her skin prickled and she glanced out of the garage door as if someone might be lurking there, “What did you say, Lieutenant?” Hinawa walked past her and pulled the door shut before tossing her her coat, “I told him that Company 8 only deals with Infernals in this district and hung up.” He told Vulcan to make sure he locked up when he was done and led her toward the kitchen. The kitchen with Hinawa always meant a heart to heart, Hinawa began preparing tea and she gave a sigh as she waited for him to say whatever it was he needed. “Tell me about the guy you went out with tonight? Description, occupation… concerns.” “Tall, dark hair and eyes, he was pretty broad.” He passed her a cup and she held it close as she leaned on the counter, “He said he was police force but then he kinda changed his story, I caught a glimpse of a tattoo on his arm when he took his coat off and it looked military.” She watched Hinawa nod slowly and then he gestured for the door, having her follow him to the equipment lock-up, “Hinawa?” “I didn’t like his tone, Y/N, I don’t like what you’re telling me.” He pulled open his gun draw and picked out a handgun, checking it over before holding it out to her, “I’m lending this to you, I know you can use it so I’m not too worried about gun safety.” “Hinawa?” She took it from him hesitantly, “I’m… I think you’re overreacting.” “You looked terrified when I said you got a call… It takes some doing to rattle you, Y/N. Cancel your dating subscription, it’s embarrassing that you even signed up. You’re an attractive woman but you need to get your head out of fairytales and start looking in the real world.” Y/N kept the gun Hinawa had given her in a holster under her clothes, she figured he was being overprotective and the thought made her feel better about the whole thing, Company 8 were her family and they looked out for her, maybe Hinawa was right and she needed to relax a little. It was a full week since her date and everything was just like normal, at least she had thought it was. It was Arthur that pointed out a reoccurring figure at the scenes they went out to, the blonde pointed past her shoulder and she turned along with Shinra, “He’s here again.” Shinra squinted into the crowd and agreed, “Yeah, he was here last time and the

time before. Do you know him, Y/N?” The figure was already walking away when she tried to get a better look, she felt a chill all over and stepped backwards nervously - straight into Obi. His hands rested on her shoulders and he searched the crowd too, “Y/N… you’re shaking.” Obi had heard about the stranger in the crowd and he had been told by Hinawa that there was a problem with her last date, the Captain guided her back to the matchbox and searched the crowd one more time before ordering Vulcan to drive them home. They all kept an eye out from then on, the figure didn’t appear again but someone kept calling the station and hanging up, Vulcan noticed that the lock on the garage had been tampered with and one morning they found a bouquet of flowers left at the doorstep. It had gotten to a point where Y/N couldn’t go anywhere without an escort. — - “Maki, could you go tell Y/N it’s her turn to do the dishes?” The woman gave her Captain a nod and headed down to the garage where Y/N said she was going to grab a screwdriver to fix something in her room. She looked around and saw only Vulcan’s feet under the matchbox and Licht trying to convince him to help with modifications. They both seemed confused as Y/N hadn’t been there in the last half an hour, the three of them started a search throughout the large building and then there was a mass panic when no one could find her. Obi had been the last person to leave the station, calling ahead to Company 5 to see if they could spare some extra feet on the ground and then he would search the local area. The phone rang and he prayed it wasn’t an Infernal, “Company 8, Captain Obi speaking… Y/N! Where the hell are you?!” “I was taking out the trash and… I didn’t see him…” Obi pressed the phone closer to his ear, she sounded so faint, “Akitaru, I… I’ve been shot.” His blood ran cold as that sunk in.

#obi akitru #reader #fire force #stalking #enen no shouboutai #enn enn no shouboutai #garth ennis

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itsclydebitches · 5 years

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RWBY Recaps: “A New Approach”

A friend of mine has a van that she calls the Fun Bus. Oh that’s cute, I thought. I should chuck that into a recap sometime. “All aboard the RWBY Fun Bus!” Except my fun levels are ehhh right now, so how about we just don’t.

In fact, let’s be totally up front about things and get the major positives out of the way:

The animation this volume is absolutely stunning holy shit

I would once again die for James Ironwood. All hail the Hug King

Excellent introduction for Tyrian and Watts. I love feeling like the villains are actually dangerous again

The rest? I’ve got some things to say.

We open on Ruby looking appropriately downtrodden over their circumstances. Getting carted off in an Atlas police craft and all that. We get a pan across each side of the airship with the group looking angry (Yang) or defeated (everyone else)... with the exception of Nora, who is trying to eat through her bonds. I’m well aware that I’m nit-picking at this point, but for once I’d like the serious moments to remain serious in this show. Given her reaction to Salem, Kuroyuri, etc. we’re all well aware by now that Nora is more than just the comic relief. Undermining the others’ reactions with her making dog noises was an early cue that the writers weren’t going to treat the group’s arrest earnestly. To say nothing of the disservice it does to her character.

Actually, there were a lot of coincidental dog references in this scene. Nora’s growling. Referring to the Ace-Ops as Ironwood’s “personal attack dogs.” Deducing that he must have a “bone to pick” with them. Obviously this all means precisely nothing. What I want it to mean is that Zwei will arrive in another package courtesy of Tai, wondering how his kids are doing after one ran off and the other went to find her.

(Seriously though, does everyone remember Volume Five’s ending with Raven? Heaven only knows when that will become relevant again.)

While Nora continues to try and eat metal like a rabid animal, Jaune expresses disbelief that the Ace-Ops “took us out like it was nothing.” Honestly, it never ceases to amaze me how often the group is surprised by other people being stronger than them. Like they’re not the youngest and least trained in a world of professional huntsmen. Rather than acknowledging their need for improvement though---callback to Ruby’s “But we already know how to fight” anyone?---Weiss frames it as an exceptionalism intrinsic to her city. “Welcome to Atlas.” You know, the same city she quickly agreed to steal from and then draw the attention of the guards by giving a racist civilian what-for. The speed with which the show flip-flops between ‘We should fear this city’ and ‘But we shouldn’t take any actual precautions’ is pretty impressive.

All of which is made weirder by Weiss’ next line to the other prisoner locked up with them: “They’re not that big of a deal.” So... which is it, Weiss? Are the Ace-Ops Ironwood’s elites who can obviously take out a group of nine in seconds flat? Or are they worth scoffing and rolling your eyes at? Because you had a rather different opinion literally seconds ago. She does the same thing when the prisoner uses the term “tyranny” to describe the situation in Mantle. She claims now that the label is a “bit much” when before the whole group decided not to approach Ironwood precisely because of how tyrannical he appeared. I swear, good chunks of the dialogue just functions as openings for the plot---let the random prisoner explain all the horrors of this city!---rather than something the character in question would actually say.

But I’m harping. We learn a bit more about Hill and her “Happy Huntresses,” clearly a parallel to Robin Hood and his band of Merry Men. I was actually surprised to learn that she’s a full-on freedom fighter, just based on her posters last episode. The number of them and their professional look felt more like Atlas’ brand of propaganda. Big brother sister is watching you and all that. Then again, we also learn that Hill is gunning for a seat on the council, so it sounds like she’s not an ally of Ironwood’s plotting betrayal, and not a radical entirely removed from him either. We’ll have to wait and see precisely where she falls in this divide between Atlas and Mantle.

That fight is treated rather cheaply by the writing though. In this episode at least. Despite providing numerous looks at how horrible things are for the citizens here, this prisoner, currently representing that fight against the elite, is depicted as an absolute buffoon. He’s not engaging in an important, glorious battle for human rights. He just chucked a brick at an airship. He’s over the top, overly passionate, crazed enough that the group is looking away as he desperately tries to convince the guards up front that these things are important. The thing is? He’s right. But the writing doesn’t encourage us to treat his cause with respect, not when he’s bouncing off the walls and yelling like a conspiracy theorist. Actually, that’s the best comparison I can think of here. It’s like if someone laying out 100% real issues with climate change were written like a crack-pot loner who believes in aliens. That’s this guy.

We’re shown again that literally everyone recognizes Weiss Schnee---does no one else in all of Remnant have white hair?---before Jaune and a few others get distracted by how pretty the view is outside. Qrow commented earlier that they were no doubt going to jail.

Spoiler! It’s not jail.

It’s Atlas Academy, animated in a truly stunning design that reminds me of Weiss’ trip to the CTV tower to contact her dad. Looking back, that skyscraper-esque building probably made her anxious for reasons outside of just the call.

“I guess we will be seeing the General,” Ruby says because yeah, why would we have the group experiencing one iota of punishment before being handed the solution to their current predicament?

Look, anyone who follows these recaps is well aware of my feelings towards the airship debacle. I said last week that I wanted the writing to treat the group’s horrific mistakes and criminal activities seriously, but I wasn’t overly hopeful. I was right not to be. From now until the conversation about Salem, the ‘protagonists can do no wrong’ mindset that drove Volume Six is pulled out again in full force.

First, Winter sees the group in handcuffs and responds with, “You have ten seconds to take those off before I start hurting you.” Which is completely out of character to me. Does Winter adore Weiss? Without a doubt. But Winter is also a stickler for protocol and rules. This is the women who threatened to remove Qrow’s tongue over a few vague, anti-Atlas statements. She is all about devotion to her Kingdom. So how should she react when she sees a group of kids being formally brought in for charges? I don’t know, maybe find out what’s going on before demanding an immediate release? Here, Winter prioritizes the emotional assumption that Weiss and her friends are perfectly innocent as opposed to trusting that they’re in handcuffs for a reason. Which they are. Combine that with the humor of the guards scrambling to obey her with more silly sound effects and it’s once again clear that the group’s arrest was never going to be taken seriously.

Things get so much worse though. Ironwood starts apologizing to them, also working under the assumption that this was all some sort of silly mistake. Of course you shouldn’t be in handcuffs. You’re the good guys! Yang and a few others have the gall to be haughty here (yeah, how dare you arrest us after we committed multiple crimes) and for a moment I think all of this will actually amount to something when Ironwood laughs and says, “We assumed [the ship] was stolen!”

Uh yeah, goes Ruby. It... was?

Which results in a brief moment of shock and about three seconds of anger from Winter... and then that’s it. That’s all we get. Weiss interrupts her with, “I’m sorry I worried you, but we did what we had to do” which, no?? Okay first off, worrying Winter is not the issue here. She’s been worried for literally those three seconds and nothing more. Second, as I’ve established numerous times in the past, they did not “do what they had to do.” Absolutely nothing in Argus forced their hand to the point where stealing military property, fighting Cordovin, drawing that grimm, and then deliberately hiding out from Atlas authorities was justified. Why doesn’t Winter or Ironwood challenge them on this? Why the hell would two military personnel accept at face value that committing all of these crimes was necessary? Imagine your younger sister steals a car (which is in no way comparable to an Atlas airship, but let’s run with it). She and her friends then get caught by the neighbor they stole it from, started a fight instead of giving it back, endangered a bunch of other people on the road, got the police involved, and hid out until they were finally arrested. Then at the police station big sister gets angry at the officers for daring to book you and is pacified with a hug. Don’t worry, dear. I know there’s no possible way you could be in the wrong here. No reason to acknowledge, let alone address, why you thought those were acceptable actions in the first place.

Qrow is briefly called out for letting this happen, but like Maria’s comment last episode about the group being incapable of keeping a low profile, he shrugs it off with a joke. “You try stopping these kids when they have their mind set on something.” You know what these ‘jokes’ remind me of? Privilege. Stuff like “Boys will be boys ¯\_(ツ)_/¯” where people accept that change is impossible, so why would we bother calling anyone out on their mistakes? Boys are just hardwired to hurt girls and call it love. Teens are just hardwired to steal airships and call it necessary. You know what they’re like. Putting your foot down is useless because that’s just how they naturally function... and we’re all going to ignore the fact that no one else could get away with this shit. They’re the special ones exempt from repercussions. There’s a reason why both both Oscar and Ruby smile here. They know they’re not in trouble.

What all of this boils down to is that the group is above both the law and basic decency. That’s what Cordovin, Ironwood, Winter, and the writing all tell us. It doesn’t matter how many people you endanger. What you steal. What you break in order to accomplish that. Or how long you might try to hide what you’ve done. You’re you, a nebulous acceptance that you’re somehow above everyone and everything. These kids are never going to learn anything because each time they make a mistake---even massive mistakes that put a whole city in danger---they’re rewarded with smiles and a blanket acceptance that they did what they had to do. That is beyond frustrating to me. For the love of god, let them face an actual consequence for once.

It’s not going to happen though. Even the Ace-Ops apologize for doing their job (and treat Ruby like some sort of celebrity in the process). RWBYJNRQO is painted as victims for suffering the indignity of arrest... when they did numerous things they should have been arrested for. I particularly love Weiss’, “You could have asked us some questions first.” Yes, because everyone should be in the habit of taking a criminal’s word at face value and then letting them go when they say, “I’m innocent.” Rather than acknowledging any of this, the writing has the Ace-Ops go out of their way to emphasize how special the group is. You’re kids, but only technically. You’re students, but who cares. You’re as good as us, regardless of training or qualifications. That fact remains that the group did in fact do everything they were accused of and more, something that should generate reflection on whether they’re up for being paired with professionals, rather than an insistence that they’re automatically on par with these adults who complete their missions in a legal, safe manner. If that Argus fight gets them hugs and cool new weaponry, I shudder to think what else the group can not only get away with, but be rewarded for.

Once everyone blindly bypasses one of the biggest conflicts of Volume Six, we hit on the other divisive choice this episode: Ruby lying to Ironwood about Ozpin and the relic.

Okay. I’m going to be as clear as I can here: Ruby is being a massive hypocrite. That’s it. That’s the situation. I shouldn’t have been surprised by the fandom’s reaction, and yet I somehow still was. In just a few hours I’ve seen at least twenty posts detailing how Ruby is not a hypocrite because her situation is totally different from Ozpin’s. HE can’t keep secrets. SHE can. Which is the definition of hypocrisy: the group holding someone to a moral standard that they themselves will not strive for. Are there differences between telling the group about Salem and telling Ironwood about Salem? Yes, but the decision of whether or not to tell them derives from the exact same concerns:

Ozpin: I don’t know if I should tell these kids about Salem. I don’t know if I can fully trust them. I worry that admitting the relic still has questions will result in them using one irresponsibly.

Ruby: I don’t know if I should tell Ironwood about Salem. I don’t know if we can fully trust him. I worry that admitting the relic still has a question left will result in him using it irresponsibly.

And everyone is in on it. During the elevator ride up they all want to know what Ruby will say, meaning that they’re ready and willing to lie the moment she decides that’s best. “We’ll follow your lead,” Blake says. No one pipes up with, “Hey. Why are we considering lying to Ironwood when we decided that there’s no moral justification for keeping secrets like that? Especially from an ally involved in this fight?” Except, the group obviously never decided that. Jaune was happy to keep his secret back at Beacon. Blake too. Yang is still withholding info about the Spring Maiden. They’re all perfectly happy to lie provided they’re the ones doing the lying. Someone else doing that to them though? Omg, how dare you.

That’s hypocrisy.

(As a side note: good lord this group is so astoundingly bad at fighting a strategic war. They announce that they should be careful about what they say to Ironwood while two of Ironwood’s guards are in the elevator with them. This is a needless conversation! No one has to establish that they’ll follow Ruby’s lead! But yes, let’s talk about our plans to withhold information from the General while two of his men are very obviously listening in. We even get a shot of one guard looking over at that little tid-bit. I wouldn’t be surprised if this came back to bite them in the form of:

Guard, who I am naming Brad: “Sir, I thought you should be aware... the prisoners that just left? I overheard them discussing whether or not they would tell you something.”

Ironwood: “What? But I thought we trusted one another... did they say what this something was?”

Brad: “No, sir. They just agreed to be careful about what they said in front of you. They clearly intended to hide something though.”

Ironwood. “Huh. Now that I think about it, Ruby did interrupt Oscar when he was about to say something. And she was awfully nervous about it.”

Brad: “Sounds suspicious, sir. I’d look into it.”

Ironwood: “Right you are, Brad. Thank you for bringing this to my attention. I’ll be sure you get a hefty bonus at the holiday party.”

Brad: “Thank you, sir! My husband and I appreciate it.”

Gay guards aside, this is why Ozpin was right to be cautious. This group is too hot-headed, too immature, and often too plain dense to keep world-shattering secrets safe. This moment gets put up alongside Yang’s demand that Ozpin spill all his top-secret info while the random old woman they picked up 30 seconds ago watches. They just don’t think.)

In short, they are in the same exact situation as Ozpin. Weighing truth against potential repercussions. The fact that said repercussions vary in severity---a group of teens betraying him and/or caving under the pressure vs. a potential dictator betraying them and/or caving under pressure---doesn’t matter. They’re both really bad potential outcomes and both parties are right to be cautious. So yes, I agree with Ruby’s hesitance. It’s the smart thing to do. What I don’t agree with is the characters’ and the fandom’s insistence that Ozpin is not likewise smart for doing the exact same thing. Now that Ruby has made this choice she’d better damn well acknowledge her own hypocrisy. If the writing doesn’t give us a serious moment in which the group reconsiders their actions against Ozpin in light of their recent choices, then the ‘protagonists can do no wrong’ mindset has irrevocably damaged this show. Because you can’t have Ruby making the exact same choices her mentor made and not change her perspective now that she’s had the chance to walk in his shoes. “Oh wow. Sometimes you do want to play information close to your chest. Maybe we were wrong to respond so viciously to Ozpin’s secrecy when I literally just did the exact same thing to someone else. I get it now.”

All that being said, I’d actually argue that Ironwood is in a more justified position to have that information. He’s a chosen member of Ozpin’s inner circle. Ozpin never got the chance to vet this group. He’s a fully fledged huntsmen in charge of an entire Kingdom. They’re a bunch of half-trained kids. Checking in on/taking the relic to Atlas does not require knowing about Salem’s immortality. Enacting a plan to tell the whole world about her really, really does.

Because what else is Ironwood’s end game here? The only way this plan makes any sense is if he believes that Salem is mortal. Ozpin may have failed to kill her, but if we get an entire world to attack her at once we’re bound to win! This plan straight up falls apart when you realize that defeating Salem is not a matter of more manpower. Salem’s immortality is the Achilles’ heel of this scheme, whereas fighting the good fight is something the group signed up for right from the start. Not that Ironwood’s plan is a great one, even if it were viable. I’m sorry, but plunging a whole world into despair---something that draws literal monsters out of the woodwork---is a pretty terrible idea. Ironwood’s army can’t be everywhere at once and an announcement of that proportion would cause an untold amount of death and destruction. I can sort of get Ironwood’s sacrificial perspective. Deal with the fallout because the end result (finally defeating Salem) will be worth it. “Trying to hide the truth from the world will eventually kill us all,” he says, except hiding the truth hasn’t limited humanity in the way he assumes it has. It has allowed humanity to live in peace while a select few try to figure out how to kill an immortal woman.

...speaking of, how has Ironwood not realized Salem immortality? This remains a basic if/then construction of the story that blows my mind whenever people fail to pass it. “If Ozpin has fought Salem for over a thousand years, then Salem is either immortal or reincarnating like he does.” Because nothing else is possible! I mean, maybe Ironwood does know about her immortality and he intends his plan to work for reasons I can’t fathom right now, but it’s looking really unlikely after this episode. It just astounds me that we haven’t had a single character go, “Of course she’s immortal. Why is that surprising to everyone?”

Anyway, I’ve gotten horrendously off topic plot-wise. We learn that Penny and Winter now know about the relics and Maidens---something that worries me a bit because, as a piece of technology, Penny is potentially hackable. Especially with Watts on the loose. The Ace-Ops know as well. We also learn that they’ve already found the Winter Maiden who, according to Qrow, is “not exactly a spring chicken.” Huh. Another important piece of information that wasn’t blithely announced because people naturally work on a need-to-know basis... Sorry. Not diving back into the salt. That comment does actually intrigue me though. We know the powers can only pass to young women, so it’s a cool setup to present us with someone who has actually survived with that power for most of her life. I’m also eager to know whether Winter is set up to be the next Maiden. “Young” is a subjective marker and one of the criticisms fans have leveled at Ozpin is the fact that he put that pressure on Pyrrha instead of asking an older, fully trained huntress to be the Fall Maiden. Making Winter the next Maiden will lend support to that criticism. Ozpin could have chosen someone older, an actual adult, and actively chose to give it to a teen. As opposed to the assumption I’ve always worked under: those like Glynda and Winter are now too old. We’ll have to see.

Outside of the Salem part of the plan, I think making Amity Arena into a satellite is an excellent idea. Provided grimm like the Nevermore really can’t reach it. It’s actually cool to see how our real life, kind of boring tech makes its way into a sci-fi/fantasy series.

And while all this stuff is getting revealed we see how utterly thrilled Ironwood is to have them all back. To be blunt: I adore this characterization. I want this to be real. Not only because it’s a breath of fresh air to have someone acting so loving and optimistic towards everyone---He acknowledges Ozpin’s existence! Look at that smile! Kneeling down!---but also because it would be an excellent subversion of the premier’s setup. Dictator-y military figures buckling under paranoia is out. Tired but loving military figures making mistakes they’re willing to fix is in. That hug with Qrow? It added ten years to my life. Tender moments between two stoic guys will carry me through these cold winter months.

But (there’s always a “but”...) I’m not willing to buy into this characterization just yet. Not only because Ruby herself obviously isn’t ready to trust it. Not only because this is a story and we expect conflicts in the form of twists and surprises. Not even because there are moments where our trio feels vaguely threatening, stationed perfectly behind that desk, separated from the rest of the group.

No, I’m hesitating because this whole encounters feels... staged. Let’s review the series of events from Ironwood’s perspective:

You learn that one of your airships has been stolen

Instead of sending some everyday guards like the situation calls for, you send out your most elite group to take care of this issue

They immediately confiscate the relic, demonstrating a) that they know it’s important (they recognize it as a relic) while likewise b) not showing any surprise that one of the four, magical objects in the world just happened to turn up among these random teens

They bring the relic to you

Someone orders the pilots to bring RWBYJNRQO to Atlas Academy, not jail

You then act surprised when the group suddenly arrives

Which, under the circumstances, makes no sense to me. Even if Ironwood had no idea who stole the airship (I’d have expected Cordovin to have contacted him about the distinctive group heading his way...), he would have figured it out the moment the Ace-Ops walked in with a relic in their possession. Someone obviously gave the order for them to bypass jail and come straight to him. Basically, Ironwood is expecting them. Ironwood set up the arrest and everything attached to it. The surprise at their arrival, the fawning over their treatment, really over the top emphasis on trusting each other... This whole thing feels fishy to me considering that he had to have known it was all happening in the first place. It feels like a man crafting a situation where he can look approachable and kindly, arriving like a savior and endearing the group to him. Remember who got you out of those bonds? Huh? Huh? Even the choice to give Ruby the relic back. Do I need to point out how incredibly stupid that is? Ironwood isn’t stupid. He wouldn’t give an invaluable, magical object back to a 17yo unless he had another, good reason for doing so; unless the need to make Ruby and her followers blindly trust him outweighs the risk the relic is in while she carries it.

I mean... seriously. The entire point of coming to Atlas was to put the relic in a safe place. And then Ironwood decides that carrying it around on the streets is somehow better than locking it up in the vault? When Ruby and everyone else just got beat by the Ace-Ops in about five seconds flat? Someone could take the relic off them in a heartbeat! It doesn’t even need to be a main villain. Some stronger-than-average goons could manage it under the right circumstances and a bit of luck. Look at this bright, shiny thing we can sell for quick lien. No, I have to believe Ironwood has an ulterior motive here. As much as I want him to genuinely be what he presents himself as---the embodiment of our opening, “When we trust in love and open up our eyes”---a lot of this just doesn’t fit.

(Then again... it’s RWBY. And the writers are clearly still working with protagonist vision goggles. Maybe Ironwood really does think Ruby keeping the relic is the best option here. In which case he’s just a fool.)

All of which, notably, still keeps our group from tackling the core, ethical issue: why they want to fight Salem when they think it’s impossible. They’re ignoring that question by keeping the truth from Ironwood. The plot avoided them completing their mission by having them get the relic back. We’re just existing in perpetual limbo here.

Which finally brings me to Penny. The end of this episode has her leading the group on an exhausting tour of Atlas Academy, the exact sort of bubbly, silly, casual interaction we got with her in the early volumes. Last week when I pointed out how inappropriate everyone’s reactions were to finding out a friend is back from the dead, a lot of people commented that we’d get to the emotional stuff later. Or going so far as to claim that the group, Ruby in particular, is suffering from a delayed reaction. Except we didn’t see that. There’s a difference between a setup and a non-evidence based assumption that what we want to watch will eventually end up on screen. There was no setup for a delayed reaction. No Ruby holding back tears. Or a closeup on someone grappling with an emotion. Or someone else trying to say something before they were cut off by the sirens. All of those imply that an emotion exists but, since we don’t have the time or the inclination to deal with it now, we’ll come back to it later. That wasn’t the case last week. Every emotion was clear and complete, no variation in regards to the overall chill acceptance of Penny’s resurrection. Now, we’ve seen that trend continue. Ruby doesn’t stop in shock when Penny appears in the Academy hall. We’re given no indication that anyone is distracted by her while discussing business, in the way one might be when a friend and ally is unexpectedly back in your life. When she’s left alone with them, there’s nothing except the montage of exhausted tourism and Ruby’s demands to know where they’re sleeping. Basically, I think this is it. Sure, maybe later down the line---maybe even next week---Ruby will have a heart-to-heart with Penny, but by that point it’ll be too late to feel emotionally fulfilling. We’ve already seen their first meeting, a surprise encounter, doing business, and hanging out together, none of which acknowledges her status as a miracle. Hell, in this episode at least, no one even cares that she knows about relics and Maidens now. Penny has never been closer to the group, but she’s still being treated primarily as the comic relief.

As @valasania-the-pale pointed out to me, we also have the question of when Penny was rebuilt. Doesn’t anyone, at the very least Ruby, care that their friend was brought back and no one thought to tell them about it? Would Ironwood, Pietro, and Penny herself have just let them live with her death indefinitely? It’s a pretty messed up situation when you think about it. A fantastic setup in my opinion, but one that Rooster Teeth isn’t equipped to handle well. Like with so much of RWBY, there’s great potential and very little follow-through.

At least Watts and Tyrian were introduced appropriately. We got confirmation that Watts helped build the Atlas code and now controls it at his whim, causing crashes and powering down security cameras. It’s the perfect threat for a city almost entirely reliant on its technology. Even down to, as said, an ally like Penny who knows all these secrets. Hell, Winter’s comment about the group having access to Atlas’ best weaponry while they’re here is worrisome. What if their upgrades end up hackable as well?

Tyrian, meanwhile, is still Tyrian. That blood pool was a great shot in my opinion. Wonderful creep factor as he sets off into the city. “I suppose we all have our talents” indeed.

Obviously then, there’s a lot going on. A lot to cover and, on my end, continually dwindling hopes that RWBY will cover it well. I can’t be too excited about the group lying when we 100% bypassed their choices last volume. If the show isn’t willing to call them out on those mistakes, I doubt they’ll be willing to call them out on this one either. I’m preparing myself to watch precisely what we’re getting in the fandom right now: an insistence that Ruby is wonderful for keeping her secrets while further demonizing Ozpin for keeping his. Because that’s where we’ve been for the past fifteen episodes: perpetually insisting that everything the group does is, by default, heroic. Logic and hypocrisy aside.

But we’ll have to see.

Until next week 💜

Minor Things of Note

1. Please pay attention to precisely how many long, wide, and aerial shots we get throughout the episode. This is what happens when your main cast is made up of twelve people all working in the same place. Plus six more including Maria and the Ace-Ops. That’s far, far too many characters.

2. I really love how the Ace-Ops’ tail gives away how excited he is. That was adorable.

3. Despite my enjoyment at Ironwood’s obvious joy over seeing Ozpin... morally this is so fucked up for Oscar. He’s introduced by Qrow as, “the next Ozpin,” essentially undermining his identity as his own person (note how massively uncomfortable his body language is in this moment). Ironwood then immediately starts speaking to him as Ozpin, not at all interested in the kid he’s housed in. If he even understands that Oscar is a separate person. We should all keep in mind that just a few days ago Qrow told Oscar to stop thinking of himself as an individual. Ruby agreed with him via her silence. The whole group was happy-go-lucky when Oscar announced that he’s resigned himself to just disappearing someday. As happy as I am that someone actually acknowledged Ozpin’s existence and (gasp!) was happy to see him, Oscar is still getting the short straw in all this. The group really treats him like he’s some form of transportation and nothing more. Penny, our resident robot, has more agency than he does.

4. Maria is still just hanging out with Pietro, I guess? Does she care that the group got arrested? Is she trying to do anything about it? I’m half expecting a comedic moment where she barges in, prepared to break them out and take on all their captors... only to realize they never needed her help in the first place.

5. I like this shot of the relic, the first thing to be bathed in light when Ironwood’s presentation ends. Not convinced it means anything, but a cool perspective nonetheless.

6. Intrigued by this guy.

7. Love, love, love, love, love Watts’ purple outfit. I mean, I’m just a sucker for purple in general. So... yeah. There’s that.

#rwby #rwby volume 7 #rwby volume 7 spoilers #mymetas #rwby recaps

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patternscolorsflowers · 5 years

Photo

So, I’ve been working with this pre-series AU sort of thing with human Alastor, and I thought I’d share! –– Though canonically asexual, Alastor strikes me as an extremely calculating and pragmatic individual who will absolutely set aside his own feelings and comfort in order to achieve greater ambitions. Historically, many prolific criminals have gone so far as to establish full-fledged alternate lives in order to remove them from public suspicion while going about their crimes. They married, had children, careers, hobbies, and were involved in their communities, and with Al’s extroverted personality, I certainly see him being able to play this part perfectly. I may actually write a short fic based on this AU, but for now I’ll just leave you guys with a (pretty long-winded) summary of what I was going for here.

Going off of what Viv herself confirmed in one of the art/animation cleanup streams, Alastor was in his mid to late 30s, possibly early 40s (she bounces back and forth with his age) when he died in 1933, which would put his birth sometime in the late 1880s or early 1890s, and he was a former radio show host living in New Orleans, Louisiana. I placed him at 43 at his time of death, with a birthdate in 1890, so just remember that’s not ‘entirely’ canon. –– The story begins in 1918 with the end of WWI, with the chaos and celebration of the end of the Great War, Alastor had already been killing for a number of years; a vibrant and cheerful radio host, he spent most of his time broadcasting and rarely left the building. Thus, most people had no idea what he looked like. When he did depart, it was always in the dead of night, to commit his gruesome and elaborately planned murders, which he was always first to report on as soon as a new body was discovered, stroking his ego as the mysterious killer.

Alastor’s long time friend and occasional partner in crime, Mimzy recognizes that he is taking things too far, and the it won’t be long before police catch up to him, people in town are starting to whisper about how detailed in his accounts and vivacious the unseen radio host is about these murders. Alastor takes her advice to heart, and takes a short reprieve from his crimes, to formulate a plan. –– Being the early 20th century, there were certain expectations of people, and certain norms it was seen as strange not to conform to. Alastor was an attractive and successful man in his late 20s, with no family, and seemingly no desire to have one. A man with that much time on his hands, who no one ever sees, is obviously going to arouse public suspicion. Alastor tells Mimzy that he believes his best cover option is to take a wife, to which she happily obliges. He refuses her, stating that although she is his dearest friend, he knows that she already has a dicey reputation of her own, and has already come up with an admittedly risky plan.

The velvet-throated radio host receives numerous fan letters (mostly from young women) from all over the city, which he hardly ever bothers to read, given their often licentious nature. Alastor sorts some of the newer envelopes based on how close to his area the letter was sent from, and selects one at random. The letter is from Violet Marchand, one of the daughters of a wealthy milliner and haberdasher in the city. –– On air in a show of good faith, he begins making a habit of showing appreciation for his fans by reading three letters each week, when reading Violet’s letter he makes sure to subtly show a little extra appreciation for the little things (her penmanship, the detail in her signature, and the the divine sprig of lavender she included with her note.) –– Violet writes him again, and he knows he has her attention.

The two begin a correspondence that lasts nearly a year, and he gets to know her better; she is the fourth of five children, and the youngest daughter, she likes to paint, though she isn’t very good, she loves to dance, enjoys music, keeps pet birds, and likes sweets and flowers. She is 17, with strawberry blonde hair, green eyes, and short, somewhat stout build. Alastor doesn’t care about her looks, but her age intrigues him; she is ten years his junior, but soon to turn 18, and being from a wealthy family, and a pillar in the community at this time period, she would no doubt be presented soon as a candidate for marriage and entrance into society. Mimzy continues to warn her friend against it, (mostly out of jealousy) but he continues to write her, dropping hints about her debut, and whether or not her family had anyone immediate in mind. Meanwhile, the young lady is smitten with her honey-laced pen pal, and doesn’t hesitate (against her father’s judgment) to issue an invitation to him. In the Spring of 1919, Alastor stuns society by attending the Marchand family’s soiree. For most people in town, this is the first time he has been seen in full view. Dressed in a vulgar bright red suit that stood out among the crowds, he met Violet for the first time. She was as he pictured her, though much more unbridled in her cheerful emotional displays than he expected of a high-society lady. As the two spent the evening’s festivities together, Alastor was quick to intimidate and shock her potential suitors by swiftly presenting a bold proposal to her father, along with a year’s worth of letters they had been exchanging. At first Mr. Marchand is furious and his wife in shock at what a risk her daughter was taking with the family’s reputation, but Alastor’s success with a self-made career, and appearance of good standing with others in the community earned him an opportunity to throw his hat in the ring.

Weeks passed after the party with nothing from the Marchand house, or Violet, until one day Alastor received a sudden offer of marriage from Mr. Marchand, giving his blessing, but a warning (that he would annul the marriage and ruin Alastor socially, if he found him to be of poor character.) The two were married. –– Young Violet was elated at being married to her town’s greatest celebrity, and admittedly being the envy of her peers. However, her bliss was not destined to last; it became apparent rather quickly that things with Alastor as her husband were not going to be all that she’d hoped. He was reluctant to spend their wedding night together, and hardly wanted to share their bed, let alone a lengthy or heartfelt conversation. They had some commonalities that brought pleasure to the two of them, such as their like of music, dance and the theater, but at the core, their personalities, and wide difference in age made for a tense household. To make matters worse, she knew about her husband’s close friendship with Mimzy, and suspected an affair, which caused Violet to sink into a deep depression.

In spite of Alastor’s aversion to sharing his bride’s bed, he knew her high-profile family, and all of the town, knowing of their marriage, would begin to question the lack of children, or any apparent romance between them, so he enlisted his wife’s help in alleviating the scrutiny he was once again facing. –– At last, half a year after the wedding, Violet became pregnant with she and Alastor’s one and only child, a daughter named Ruby, was born in 1920. –– His ruse was complete. An affluent marriage to a jovial and attractive wife, a healthy new baby, a beautiful home, and a successful career, he was, by all forethought, beyond reproach. Though she was not entirely wanted by Alastor, who was only involving himself in this union for personal gain, Ruby quickly became regarded as a part of a very small (nearly nonexistent) circle of people who had Alastor’s love. He relished in spending time with her at home, she was an inquisitive and intelligent girl, who reminded him much of himself in his youth, though growing up in luxury made her struggles in life considerably easier than anything he had endured growing up. –– Years passed, Alastor kept to his ‘hobby’ as he called it, and was much away from home. Having a child seemed to lift his wife’s spirits greatly, and she was often distracted by his absence with spending time with Ruby, who from an early age, held many of her father’s traits. Though she wasn’t an especially violent or ill-tempered child, she rather craved violence in the things she liked to read and draw, which sparked alarm in her mother, who insisted that she needed more of Alastor’s presence in her life. Alastor obliged, bringing his daughter with him to work, and even letting her help him broadcast. While on their break, Ruby, now 7 years old, is the first to break the ice about why she was made to come with him. Alastor is seemingly captivated and inspired by the things his young daughter talks about, and a part of him is eager to share with her, his “hobby,” but knows he must tow the line delicately. He decides to plan a hunting trip with her. Surprisingly, Violet is accepting of his proposition, on the stipulation that she doesn’t actually use his guns.

During the trip, Alastor teaches Ruby about game hunting and tracking. He uses many of the same techniques when scouting out and cornering his human victims, so inwardly, he believes these are sufficient beginner lessons for her about his hobby killings. –– Ruby proves herself to be a natural tracker, like her father, but can’t bring herself to actually watch her father fire the gun. Alastor doesn’t chide her on it, but a part of him is disappointed, and yet, the other half, relieved.

Two years later, the Great Depression hit, and the Marchand family’s grand business takes a massive blow. Alastor decides that the family should downsize to conserve what they have, and move to a smaller home. Though a financially wise decision, this would prove to be the beginning of his undoing. –– In their stately old home, Al had a large private office and trophy room that only he was allowed to enter. In this room, along with a few items for personal pleasure (books, a Victrola, records, etc.) he kept the instruments he used to commit his crimes. –– The family’s new home was a great deal smaller, three bedrooms, a kitchen and one bathroom, but they couldn’t complain, they were much better off than millions of others. Speaking of the struggles and mass chaos of the Depression, Alastor inwardly relished at the opportunities this granted him. Thousands of people were dying and committing suicide en masse, he could double up on his atrocities and no one would be the wiser!

Alastor enlisted Mimsy’s companionship to seek new victims, the club that she danced and sang at had closed its doors anyway, and rather than sink into destitution, she gleefully accepted her friend’s prospects. During that year alone they claimed nearly one hundred lives, but little did they know, they were being watched. The owner of the club Mimzy was once employed at was Gerard Marchand, one of Violet’s older brothers, estranged from his parents, but in good company with his younger sister. He had seen Alastor and Mimzy sneaking into the abandoned building on numerous occasions, moving bags with unknown contents in and out with them nearly every night. When Garard investigated himself and discovered the pools of blood, and basins full of sinewed instruments being cleaned, he immediately called the authorities. Mimzy was caught upon her return to the club, but refused to give Alastor’s name. Gerard however, confirmed he knew him, and the police set off to arrest him. –– At home, Violet sensed something was amiss, as her husband, normally distant, sat between she and Ruby on the sofa, silently holding them close. His jacket smelled of sweat and blood. When the authorities arrived, Alastor kissed them both and went to answer the door himself, he was promptly arrested, and additional instruments, and trophies from his many victims, were discovered locked in his desk, sitting out in the open living room (having since been deprived of a private office.) –– The conviction sent the city into a further uproar, some claiming they’d known he was strange from the beginning, that they “knew” he had something to hide, and others, like Violet, in a shocked and speechless state.

Alastor was sentenced to death by hanging in 1933, and while he was taken to the gallows, he declined to have his head covered, wanting to experience every bit of his execution. As the noose was tightened around his neck, and the witnesses glared, stone faced at the platform, and the boards swung loose from beneath his feet, Alastor smiled until he had gone from the world.

PHEW! YEAH. Thanks if you stuck around to actually read all of my nonsense! Haha! Just something I’ve been working with for a little while. Like I said, I might do more with this, I might not. Not sure yet, would you guys like to see more?

Alastor, Mimzy, and Hazbin Hotel © Vivziepop

Ruby and Violet © Me

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel fanart #hazbin oc #alastor #mimzy #fan au #oc #alastor x oc #alastor x mimzy #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #vivzmind #vivziepop #digital art #color #photo #illustration

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stillthewordgirl · 7 years

Text

LOT/CC fic: Just One Night, ch 4 (of 5)

When Team Legends returns to Central City for Barry and Iris' wedding, Sara jumps at a chance to do something, anything, else.

She doesn't even remotely suspect where that decision will lead her. (Or to whom.)

Thanks again to @larielromeniel for reading this. Can also be read here at AO3 or here at FF.net.

Dedicated to @pir8grl, who wrote me fic during a hard day last weekend. ((hug))

Leonard's failed miserably at controlling his expression, and the look on Sara's face confirms it. She looks uncertain, suddenly, a look he's seen on her so very rarely, but she steps down from her perch toward him, taking one step, then another, as she studies him. The rest of the city seems very far away, suddenly, the noise almost hushed, and he thinks she's waiting for him to speak...

He's abruptly terrified, something he hasn't felt in a very long time... or at least since that last night on the Waverider when, shuffling a deck of cards from hand to hand, he'd paced the halls for an hour before finding his way to her room.

“I saw things. In the Time Force,” he blurts out in distraction, a move that’s so uncharacteristic it shocks him. “Like Mick and the sort of future he could have. Other things. That’s one of the reasons I asked Barry not to contact the Waverider or tell anyone on the team. They can't know yet."

Sara blinks at him, but recovers quickly. "But I do. Doesn't that count?"

"You weren't in that particular vision. Mick was... so were Jax and Stein, as Firestorm... and a woman with a necklace and some sort of animal powers..."

"Amaya." Well, at least the distraction is working, based on the tone of Sara's voice. "She's actually the one back at the Waverider with Mick now."

"Oh, really?" So much easier to fall back on snark. "Well, that explains a few things. Where's she from?"

"The 1940s." Sara waves a hand at his expression. "It's complicated. But why do you think Mick can't see you until this vision comes true?"

"Like I said. If he does, it won't happen. Same with those others, because I saw them finding out about me, in the vision. And you know Raymond, it's not like he'll keep his mouth shut if he finds out." He meets her eyes briefly. "You, I trust."

The atmosphere's just on the verge of getting a bit too highly charged again when Sara glances away.

“So, did you see me?” she asks lightly before glancing back. “In the Time Force? At all?”

Well, that was inevitable.

“No,” he says, looking at a point just off to the right, avoiding her eyes. “Sorry. If I did, I don’t remember. I’ve forgotten a lot of it, I think.”

He’s lying. She knows it. She’s pretty sure he knows she knows it.

But she hasn't decided whether to call him on it (or ignore it in favor of the myriad other questions she has) when a quickly stifled shriek from the alley on the opposite side of the building interrupts them. It's a type of cry, tinged with pure panic, that Sara has heard a good many times before, and she's reacting before the sound fully dies from the air.

She whirls and races for the edge, vaulting over in one smooth motion and reaching, as she does, for the matching fire escape just long enough to check her momentum, following that with similar moves with a windowsill, a drain pipe, a recycling tote.

She lands neatly, and the three men, one of whom has his hand over the mouth of a terrified-looking young woman, all gape at her a minute before the two with their hands free laugh and start for her. Sara takes a step back, eyeing them and noting how they grin as, she thinks, they decide she's easy prey. They move like fighters with experience... but nothing like her.

They don't really know what hits them.

The big redhead hits the ground after a neat jab to his throat; the smaller blond takes a swing, but she dodges it easily, and a hard kick to his kneecap quickly sends him sprawling, howling in pain. Sara keeps her eyes on them only long enough to be sure they're staying down, then looks back at the other man and his prisoner.

From the state of the woman's feet—shoeless and with filthy heels—he'd grabbed her elsewhere and dragged her back here, but Sara now notes fury in the brown eyes, and the way she's still actively struggling against the grip. The man holding her, however, is far too large for her to break away from without training.

Well. That's why Sara's here.

The man frowns at his compatriots, then cuts his cold gaze back to her.

"This doesn't concern you," he growls. "Bitch has it coming."

Sara doesn't bother answering. She just smiles and takes another step toward him.

With another growl, he releases his intended prey, giving the woman—girl, really--a vicious shove away from him and starting toward Sara. She pauses only long enough to advise "It's OK. Run!" and then it’s time to concentrate on the fight.

He knows what he’s about, more than the other two. But he’s no match for a League-trained assassin, and Sara’s mostly toying with him, dodging and blocking, her main concern how to take him out without doing too much damage. (Some, she figures, he has coming to him.)

At least until his eyes flick over her shoulder and he smiles....

Then there's another man, running down the alley, drawing a gun as he gets closer... only to run straight into Leonard's fist as the crook drops the last few feet down from the fire escape.

The incident has the added benefit of distracting her opponent, too, and Sara takes advantage of that to roll her eyes and drive her knee into his crotch, sending him whimpering to the ground, where she follows it up with a precise tap to the temple with her boot. Then she turns to lift an eyebrow at Leonard in a clear "what took you so long?"

"Sorry for the delay," he tells her, just a touch of humor in the tone. "I can't fly."He studies the unconscious men at her feet, then lifts his gaze again, a familiar look sparking in it. "I'd nearly forgotten how much I like to watch you fight."

The innuendo is back, but then it's always come easily to them. Flush with adrenaline, she grins at him. "Well, at least I know you'll always be watching my...back."

"It's a nice... back." He pokes the redhead with the toe of a boot, shaking his head as the man whimpers. "What'll we do with these losers?"

But Sara's already on it. "Mick," she says into her comm, "get on the dedicated line Barry set up to the CCPD, tell them they have a pickup at an alley on Haynes Street, down toward the seedier end. 'Flash special.' Intended victim is gone, but I expect they'll have plenty on these guys." She smiles again. “And apologize to Amaya for me. Hope that moment wasn’t too…inconvenient.”

She chortles as she taps the comm off again, looking back over at Leonard, who looks slightly nonplussed by her words and their implications. Still, he rebounds with a shrug.

“So, we should get out of here,” he points out. “Barry cleared my record, but cops… me… probably not good…”

“Right.” Sara looks up at the fire escape and then smirks at him. Leonard sighs, but smirks back… and waves a hand at the roof.

“Lead on… Canary.”

They linger, for a while, keeping an eye and an ear on the area. Sara makes a couple of vaults onto the nearby buildings for a better view, while Leonard stays on their original perch and makes snarky comments at her.

Which is no more than she expects.

She can’t quite wipe the smile off her face for some reason, she thinks, as she lands back on the original building (with perhaps a just little more of a flourish than she needs) and starts walking back to where Leonard is waiting, in his characteristic lean, against a raised vent.

“Still quiet,” she says. “And Mick says the same.” She raises an eyebrow at him. “You know anything about why that might be?”

Smirk. “Nope,” he drawls, raking his eyes over her. “Nothing at all.”

“Bullshit.” But her comment is fond, and when she takes up her own place leaning against the vent, their shoulders are touching. They stand a while, listening to the sounds of the city around them.

Eventually, Leonard clears his throat, and Sara glances up at him, studying his profile in the moonlight.

“I’m sorry,” he says.

“Excuse me?”

Leonard looks down at her, and his expression is sober, his eyes steady and fixed on hers.

“About your sister,” he says. “Barry told me.”

It’s been a while, for her, but it’s still a kick in the gut. Sara closes her eyes momentarily, then opens them. “Thank you.”

She feels Leonard shift next to her, although she’s not looking at him. “No way to …?” he says, tentatively.

“No.”

“Damn.” Silence again. A distant gale of laughter rises from the street, a group of young women out for a bachelorette or just a night of fun, the sound dying away as a distant ambulance siren rises.

Finally, Sara speaks again, leaning into him just a little more, encouraged as he doesn’t move away. “What about your own sister? Bet she’s glad you’re back.”

Silence.

After a long moment, she turns and looks up at him. “Seriously?”

Leonard studiously avoids looking at her. “It’s sort of like with Mick. If she knows…”

Sara can’t help herself. She grabs his arm, loosening the grip almost immediately but maintaining the contact as his startled eyes meet hers. “Leonard…Len. You need to tell her. Trust me on this one.” She laughs a little, a humorless sound. “I’ve been there. I don’t know what you think will happen…”

Somewhat to her surprise, he doesn’t pull away… and although he glances away again, he almost immediately looks back at her. When he speaks, his voice is low and intense “I saw her, Sara. In the Time Force. And she looked happy. I can’t tell you the last time I saw her look that happy.” He shakes his head roughly. “I can’t do anything to mess with that. I can’t.”

The anguish there is undeniable. Sara swallows, then, gently, reaches out and puts her free hand on his chest, over his heart. She feels Leonard flinch, just slightly, but he doesn’t otherwise move away, and they stand there as the city moves around them.

“Why is it you think telling her will jeopardize that?” Sara asks quietly. “Seems to me she’d be happiest if she knew you were OK.” She shakes her head. “Take it from me. It’s a sorrow that never goes away. If she was as happy as you say, in this vision…”

“I’d think it’s that my absence would let her make a fresh start.” Bitterness there, in his tone, and perhaps something a little more…lost. Sara’s fingers tighten on the fabric under her hand, then relax. She can feel his warmth, the steady beat of his heart.

“There’s nothing keeping her from doing that anyway. Or Mick. Stop giving yourself so much credit, Leonard.” Her tone purposefully turns toward teasing. “You’re only responsible for you. And I happen to think you’re not so bad.”

That gets a half smile. It doesn’t last long, though, and he shakes his head as he speaks one word.

“Legion.”

But Sara is having none of it. “People change, Leonard. And that’s not you anymore.” She smiles as he peers at her. “Yeah, I’m using your own words against you.”

He snorts, but the half smile is back. Sara is abruptly aware, again, of how close they’re standing. But neither of them is inclined to move.

“Give yourself a break, Len,” she tells him quietly. “You don’t have to punish yourself to give everyone else their chance. Move forward. It’s OK.”

He’s definitely smiling now. “That so… captain?”

“Consider it an order.” She smiles back. “Barry told you about that?”

“Mmhmm. Like I said, talk, talk, talk.” His eyes are dark as he looks down at her. “Some of it was pretty interesting, though. I’m sorry I missed the aliens.”

“I wish you’d been there.” The confession hangs in the air a moment, and Sara, taking a deep breath, makes a decision.

"If you think you being back in Central City would cause Mick to leave the Waverider, would cause Lisa to go back to a life of crime, why don't you just come back on board?” she says casually, looking up at him. “We… I… the team… could use you.”

She almost expects some innuendo at that. Instead, she gets a sigh, and two words.

"I can't.”

Her fingers tighten on black fabric again. “Why not?”

His hand comes up, fingers wrapping loosely about her wrist. “Because according to Harrison Wells, I am... what was the word?... just lousy with temporal energy.”

He nods at her intake of breath. “From the Time Force, I guess. Enough to well and truly fuck up any instruments that rely on it. Now, he thinks that will dissipate with time, but..." He shrugs. “I can’t. Even Barry’s Gideon thinks so.”

“Wait. What?”

“You’ll have to ask him about that.” A smile lurks around his mouth, then drops away. “I’m sorry, Sara. This is all I get. For now.”

They’re leaving tomorrow. Leaving him behind, again. And although it helps immeasurably to know he’s alive and here and whole…

Just one night.

So much she could say in that moment. She stares at him in the moonlight… and then says the second thing that pops into her head.

"Wanna crash a wedding?"

#captain canary #just one night #sara lance #leonard snart #legends of tomorrow

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se-seashell · 7 years

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A minute of madwoman’s anime noses appreciation. Talking mostly about female noses, because they suffer from “we need to make something cute, and a realistic long nose with nostrils is not cute” fashion more than male ones.

Caused by the latest Ufotable Fate/SN Heaven’s Feel promo art. Remember those jokes about rhinoceros/shark/other weird-nosed things Tohsaka Rin from the Unlimited Blade Works airing? More memes incoming! I’d like to complain about their drawing style degeneration in Type-Moon adaptations in general, but not here and not today (maybe never at all).

I think that a nose is a incredibly important part in a character’s portrait. It determines individuality in appearance greatly. Old-school series with realistic/semi-realistic style like Ginga Eiyuu Densetsu are perfect examples. A TON of important characters, and all of them don’t look the same, all of them are easily recognizable and unique. One can say something even about a character’s personality, just looking at the nose. (If you didn’t watch Gineiden, try to guess characters’ inner world traits from their portraits, it’s entertaining.)

Well, I don’t mind usual “big cute eyes and two points/lines supposed to be a nose and a mouth” style - sometimes it looks cool (mostly just “meh, I’ve seen it somewhere”). But it leaves less room for character individuality anyway - we end up with a bunch of cute huge-eyed girls and boys with different eye/hair/skin colors and similar faces. Their faces say little about them.

I really appreciate an accurate realistic or semi-realistic nose, narrow and straight, or curvy and upturned, or rough and massive. I like it when an artist isn’t afraid to draw a big nose on a young girl’s face (ayyyyyy, Versailles no Bara, Shoujo Kakumei Utena and some other shoujos) or draw nostrils (like Manglobe guys and their beautiful Ergo Proxy and Samurai Champloo). I’m okay with simple noses too if they fit some kind of an unusual and pretty style (look at Cowboy Bebop, old Muv-Luv style, Gainax and Trigger works). I don’t like when professional artists act like “hey, let’s just draw some drukard’s line there for a profile view, who even cares about a nose, noses/chins/detailed lips are ugly and not cute, we need only eyes for an anime character’s face”. Noses exist in anime, noses aren’t ugly, noses are no less beautiful and cute than boobies! eyes.

Maybe I’m just a freaky fetishist.

#anime #ginga eiyuu densetsu #gyakkyou burai kaiji #shoujo kakumei utena #ergo proxy #hellsing ultimate #tengen toppa gurren lagann #satoshi kon #kara no kyoukai #flcl #drawing style #animation style

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13flowersandfoxes · 7 years

Note

1-99 please and thank

I vote you do this too you turd

* do you have a favourite sweater? * My green one* what’s your middle name? * Not telling 😊* do you still talk to the first person you kissed? * Nope* do you get on with your grandpa? * They’re both dead so…. * what was your favourite cartoon as a kid? * Probably monsters inc or nightmare before Christmas. Or Aladdin. Or lilo and stitch. I DUNNO. * what’s your favourite cartoon now? * Pretty much the same, except you can add tangled to the list* do you read the news paper? * No* who was the last text you sent to ? * Brendan* what does the last text you sent say? * :P* if you could have any hair colour what would it be? * Red with a bit of green. Maybe purple?* do you like nature documentaries? * Yeah :)* what is your aesthetic? * Nature, also just super classy looking stuff. Or old stuff. Idk* when did you last pet a dog? * Probably when I left my place in Utah. It’s been a while :(* whose friend’s parents do you like the most? * Probably my guy best friends * have you ever been on a road trip? * Hahahaha that’s cute yes* tell me about someone you know called emma * A cranky black cat* are you reading a book in english class, what is it? * I’m reading dark places by Gillian flynn for fun* do you have a favourite aunt? * Yeah the aunt I’m living with* baths or showers * both* skiing or sun bathing? * Sun bathing cause I don’t know how to ski* do you kill spiders? * Pretty much only if they’re in my shower or upsetting my pets* have you ever made an ice pop? * I don’t know* are you wearing shoes right now? * No* tell me about you favourite primary school/elementary school teacher * I don’t really remember them that well and I have more bad memories of teachers than good. Not that they were all bad, just that I had one particularly horrible teacher. There was one teacher at the school I didn’t have that was awesome though* who was the last person you hugged? * I think the guy that offered to let me work with him at his wedding company as an intern for a wedding * do you wear glasses? * Yes* do you have a cat? * Yes* do you have a favourite pair of underwear? * A couple lol* what was your last tweet? * I don’t have twitter * do you still use facebook? * Not really* do you like birds? * More for watching. They’re not an animal I’ve ever thought of having as a pet* who was the last person you called cute? * All of tumblr?* how did you meet your best friend? * Theatre class* escalators or elevators? * Depends * are you named after anyone, who? * No* what was your first url? * Same as this one* autumn or winter? * Autumn * do you win at scrabble? * Yeah* put your ipod on shuffle , who is the first song that comes up by? * Kate Nash * have you ever drunk from a mason jar? * Maybe* can you draw? * A little. I probably would be decent if I’d ever worked at it or had a teacher but I had a teacher who was an asshole and wouldn’t let me take art* what was your first profile picture? * How the fuck am I supposed to remember it’s literally been years?* favourite tshirt? * If we’re talking softest my salt lake comic con one is amazing. But I also love my Batman one cause Batman * best tumblr friend? * I know @aqueous-stars really well, but lately I’ve been talking to you a lot, it changes from time to time though just as I talk to people and such* when did you last run? * Probably when I had to run after my friends cause they’re crazy * do you like to paint your nails? * Yeah* did you ever do something as a kid that got you into loads of trouble? * I punched a girl in the face. But I got off easy cause I didn’t have a disciplinary past. And I got in trouble loads with my parents. Including them removing my bedroom door which I hateeeeed cause I have this thing about doors being left open* who is your favourite dog that isn’t yours? * My old next door neighbors retriever/lab mix named Sarah, she was a big drunken sweetheart and was always so happy to see me * have you ever been drunk? * Nope* have you ever done something you regret while drunk? * Nope* do you want to kiss anyone right now? * Kinda. Not necessarily anyone in particular, just affection would be nice* do/did you like you math teacher? * Yeah I only had one math teacher I didn’t like and it was just cause he didn’t focus. Nice guy, just didn’t teach. * do you often ride the bus? * Not very often* do you have a fireplace in your house? * Yeah* are you violent when you’re angry? * Yeah. Not at people though. I just wanna throw things and hurt myself. * do you cry when you’re angry? * Yeah. * favourite Harry potter book? * Probably 3* can you remember your last dream? * Nope* do you go to bed early or late? * I go back and forth* do you speak a second language? * Trying to learn German* who was your first ever best friend? * My friend Julia. We’re still friends but we’re very different from each other, but our families are friends and everything so we grew up together. We even moved from California to Utah at the same time* have you ever had an operation? * 4 knee surgeries * tell me about your favourite cousin * I don’t really talk to any ofmy cousins. I call another family friend who’s my best friend my cousin though. His name is John and he’s a great guy. * do you have a piece of clothing that doesn’t even fit you anymore but you can’t bare to throw away? * Yeah I have this gorgeous blue dress* have you ever been in a musical? * Yeah * do you have a porch? * No I guess not* how many times have you watched your favourite movie? * I dunno I don’t count these things * what do you order at mcdonalds? * An über home* do you get on with old people? * Not really. My grandmother hates me irrationally so I have a hard time being comfortable with them. I do know an amazing man in his 70s named buzz whom I would pay good money just to hang out with again cause he’s so much fun* science fiction or romance? * Both?* do you take naps? * Yes * how many classes do you/did you take in high-school? * A lot* when did it last snow where you live? * In Utah:yesterday probably. In California: like when I was 11* does it ever snow where you live? * Yes* how many months until your birthday? * 9* how much charge does your computer have right now? * 21* what is your favourite disney channel movie? * Starstruck is a guilty pleasure TBH (his eyes are gorgeous okay)* the city or the sea side? * Sea side* what is your least favourite colour? * Orange* do you have homework to do? * Nope* are you still friends with your first best friend? * Yes* do you have/are you the gay cousin? * I’m bi, but me and none of my cousins are out if they are gay. Lol* do you own dungarees? * I know I’ve heard the translation but I forgot and idc* do you like to play sport? * Yes* what was your favourite ever christmas present? * Disneyland pass* how old are you? * 20* what is your mum’s name? * Nope* do you ever use internet explorer? * Nope* have you ever had blonde hair? * It’s my natural color* is their a play park near your house? * They’re building one right across the street * when did you last see the person you have a crush on? * A few weeks ago. But I’ll see him soon* who did you last talk to on the phone? * My mom/sisters* pants or dresses? * Either. I’m not picky* do you read fan fiction? * Not really. I don’t have the attention span. I’ll read short ones I see here sometimes thought * what is your favourite blog? * I dunno* do you write poetry? * Not really* drama or comedy? * Both* have you ever had a hickey? * Yep

#hana answers #asks

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satanandmeappreciation · 7 years

Text

Spotlight #8 - buttfaceandme (Buttie)

http://buttfaceandme.tumblr.com/

Tell us a little about yourself!

Hi, I’m Buttie, and you may or may not know me! I like reading SaM and for a while, I regularly graced the fandom with silly doodles and humor. I’m a 21 year old German, I love pigeons, and welcome to my crib.

When did you get into the fandom and how did you stumble upon it?

I found the comic through the original post and started reading it fairly early on (the fact that I can’t remember the exact update it was on at the time for memories sake is my biggest regret to date). After looking through the entire tag, I was a buttman obsessed, and started watch the streams also -- Run was one of my first ones, but I’d seen a handful before it. However, I never talked in streams, and didn’t join the fandom at all until August 2015. When I made my blog (with a placeholder URL that ended up sticking) is when I fell fast and hard, and ended up getting really involved with the fandom. The ‘final’ stream had passed by the time I’d started socializing, so I was pretty upset, but I’ve gotten to attend a lot of streams since then!

Who are your favorite characters/pairings? I’m not big on shipping and vaguely dislike romantic ships -- platonic’s where it’s at. That said, I do appreciate ChamZoe, I’ve got an interest in Kristi/Laila and Anabiel/Jophiel/Metatron and I’m 100% weak for Pailix. The latter’s honestly the only ship I’d say I have, but I guess poly-ships in general are how to get me.

Characters are hard, cause I love all of them. Right now I’d say it’s Michael, Uriel, Pax, maybe Raguel and I loved every moment we had Jericho in the story. Sheipos. (Especially Sheila though.) And that one silver-haired background angel.

Favorite moment in the comic?

My favorite moment is [redacted for spoilers], [redacted for more spoilers] and every time there’s a good shot of Michael (or generally visually pleasing angel stuff -- the bottom line is, art will always trump plot for me).

What is your biggest inspiration as far as your art/writing goes?

I wish I knew how to answer this question, but I really don’t; it doesn’t help that I’m completely lacking inspiration right now. I think usually when I produce something, it’s based on a spur-of-the-moment idea or joke... so maybe it’s the fact that you can take a joke or a concept and take it further, through art? I was in a big art slump before joining the Samily™, and I wouldn’t have started drawing again without outside input. When I made a bunch of humorous, doodly comics, it was kind of like making art with people -- always through interacting, part of a conversation, etc. and that gives you a lot of energy. Also notes. Everybody loves notes. Mhmm.

What would you say is your favorite piece that you’ve done so far?

the real favorite piece is the friends we’ve made along the way

(This is a very tough question, especially since most of my SaM work hasn’t been serious. I’m settling on this comic, because it never fails to make me laugh, and these are what people know me for. However, my magical girl designs are a close second!)

What would you say is one of your favorite things to draw/write? For drawing I guess I enjoy drawing hair, fabric and flowy things a lot; angels, as well as just designing outfits or color-mapping things. With a solid sketch, line-arting is one of my favorite things. Oh, and people facing left at a slight angle, that’s a good one. Also, when I’m doodling traditionally I somehow always end up drawing Gabe! The nose has me hooked (ha ha).

I don’t write a lot, but I used to love discussing meta with people and it was great. I love just putting down my thoughts, rambling, theorizing, and using 27 different adjectives to describe the same thing in a weird mix of poetry and prose. I’m a huge sucker for concepts and thoughts, and can’t do plot.

What do you think influences your art/writing style?

I don’t really have a good answer for this one. I guess I get inspired by cartoons and animation a lot when it comes to style, but I also just really liking at art, so it just all comes together. I definitely don’t try to do anything specific. No way for me to not mention Orange here though, because I’m sure I’ve learnt more from watching her draw than I can think of. The best way to describe it is that I’ve seen her drawn some things -- like profiles, for example -- and gone ‘oh’, because it just clicked, and suddenly made sense to me.

What are some of your hobbies you enjoy? I like singing, daydreaming, taking walks and generally being outside. And looking at pretty things, which sounds silly, but is super fulfilling.

Before joining SaM, what was a fandom you were part of and are there any fandoms you’re into outside of SaM? I’d stopped being active in fandoms for quite a while before SaM. While I’m a fan of a lot of things, I was always passive and never contributed... before SaM. Things I enjoyed were the unmentionables of Sherlock, SPN and Marvel when they were big, Homestuck, Madoka and maybe other webcomics. I feel like there’s more, those don’t feel like my main fandoms at all, but I can’t think of anything else. It’s all a blur, really, who remembers life before SaM?

Is there anything else you’d like the fandom to know about you or anything you’d like to say to the fandom as a whole? I didn’t wanna make it my favorite piece, but please read Cockoa Latte (NSFW). It’s a work of art. Also, I had nothing to do with Butts before SaM. Nothing. Now they’re my entire identity, proving how damn powerful these people are. What I’m saying is, choose your name wisely.

P.S. I love you guys (even if I don’t know most of you) and I really need to start checking in on the tag again. This fandom will always be special to me. Keep producing all the lovely content you do! ♥

Please check out Buttie’s art tag and show her some love!

SFW Art tag: http://buttfaceandme.tumblr.com/tagged/myart

Writing tag: http://buttfaceandme.tumblr.com/tagged/my+writing

NSFW tag: http://nuttfaceandme.tumblr.com/tagged/myart

#spotlight #buttfaceandme #satan and me #thisiskindagross

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chimpanzeemusic · 6 years

Text

I’ve been picking up some financial slack between jobs and travels by working as a substitute teacher. The pay is bad, The flexibility is nice, the absurd conversations are worth remembering.

2nd Grade 7 year-old: So, how old are you? Me: Eighty two. 7 year-old: Oh. An hour later, another teacher enters the room to get something and I recognize her from when I used to swim at a neighborhood pool, and we chat Me to teacher: Yeah, I think I was a teenager when your kids began swimming there. 7 year-old is watching nearby, eyes narrowed. After the other teacher leaves, he moves to confront me. 7 year-old: You were talking to the teacher, and she’s, like, thirty-nine. If you’re just a little older than her kids… then you’re not eighty-two! Me: My disguise has been discovered! **runs from the room**

Katrina, 2 min sketch

High School Typically the easiest job. The benefit is people don’t really care about your existence, so they mostly do their own thing. The drawback is people don’t really care about your existence, and mostly do their own thing, regardless of what you do.

The high school medical anatomy class finishes a quiz. Student: Can you put on some surgeries for us to watch while we’re working? Me: Your teacher shows you these in class. Student: Yeah, totally. Me: I have no way of verifying the truthfulness of this claim. Imma go with no. Student, sighing with disappointment: Ohhhkay. It’s probably for the best, though. People sometimes pass out when they watch nose surgeries, they put a chisel up the nose and pound with a hammer… that tends to get ’em. The next class comes in. Me: Does Mr. C show y’all surgeries? Class: Yes. Me: Oohkay then.

I asked another class about Mr C, who apparently shows all kinds of amputations, ACL surgeries, removal of a hairball from the stomach of a woman addicting to eating her own Herbal Essence-infused follicles, the extrication of a fist-sized kidney stone from a bladder…

Student 1: Sometimes I can’t watch. Student 2: We’ll be dissecting something in class and he’ll cut off a piece, like he did with this cow lung one time, and He flung it at the whiteboard and yelled “Look, it sticks!” and then just left the slice there all class period. We get blood on the whiteboard a lot.

“He flung it at the whiteboard and yelled ‘Look, it sticks!’ and then just left the slice of cow lung there all class period. We get blood on the whiteboard a lot.’

#justsurgerythings

That part about sticking a chisel up someone’s nose and whacking it with a hammer? Apparently it’s accepted rhinoplasty technique. Which, disappointingly, does not involve a live rhinoceros.

Middle School A middle school dance class is practicing for a multicultural dance assembly when someone nabs the audio jack and blasts Justin Bieber’s “Baby.” Me: There is no way this song is still relevant. Middle schoolers sing word-for-word to the song. Me: It cannot be. The Ludacris rap section begins, even bystanders get down. Ludacris and Tweens: “When I was thirteeeen, I had my first luuuv!” There was nobody that compared to my baaaaby— And nobody came between us, no one could ever come aboooove…!” Me: noooo

Elementary If you’ve slept sufficiently, elementary and especially kindergarten are enjoyable: busy, hilarious. Also, cruel.

Me: Hello class! My name is Mr… I lose my train of thought and hesitate a split-minute too long. Kindergartner: Potato! Kindergartners, losing it completely: Hahahaha! Mr. Potato! Me: What? No, it’s— Kindergartners: Potato! Potato! Mr. Potato! After weakly struggling to restore order, I retreat to the teacher’s desk and sulk quietly. Me: My name is not Mr. Potato.

#organic

Kindergartner: Your shirt has lots of birds on it. Me: That is because I am secretly lots of birds taped together. Kindergartner: …

A student teacher is leading the kindergartners in reading three-letter words aloud. I am reading with them, but have not yet been introduced. I am sitting next to Señorita Sassypants, a bright, outspoken and conniving child. Class: B-at. J-am. C-at. H-am. Me: Bat. Jam. Cat. Ham. Señorita Sassypants: Wait, how do you already know all this stuff? You don’t go here. You’re not a student!” Inclusive Child, (same height as my waist): Wait, wait, you go here! You can be a student, too!

Kinder 1: Why you wearing fancy shoes? Me: These here are my dancing shoes. Kinder 1: Why you wearing dancing shoes? Me: So I can dance away the blues. Kinder 1: …Huh? Kinder 2: You’re Team Rocket!?

Hairy Otter and the Rage of Elsa, Conte on Paper

Six-year old: When you learned to walk, you were one year old. Five-year old: Actually, I was five!

Who gets to draw the Purple Froople?

Visiting Music Teacher to kids: Who gets to draw the Purple Froople?

Fergalicious, an ideal name for your weasel

Child: I want to draw the Chocolate Womple! Visiting Music Teacher: Nina, your Stroiper looks amazing. Me to me: The heck is going on in hereMy brother also subbed kindergarten for a bit. Here’s two experiences of his: Brother: Okay guys, I am going to tell you about a scary story about a time I had a run-in from a bear. Before he even begins the story, several students crawl beneath their seats. Brother: Where–what are you are you doing? Students: We’re scared, teacher! Brother: Look, you can’t be under there. Everyone get back up. They do. He tells a story where various noises and surprises happen and the students think it is a bear, but it ends up being a stick, or a squirrel, until… …Well, the next thing that happened was as I laid in my hammock was the bear came up and pushed my hammock a little. And then I screamed, and looked out of my hammock, and it ran away into the woods! I had to change my pants after that. Student 1: Wait, why did you have to— Student 2: IT’S ‘CAUSE HE PEED HIMSELF! Students, shrieking with laughter at the implied urination, fall on the floor and roll around, at last fulfilling the ancient AOL messenger prophecy, “ROFLOL.”

Students shriek with laughter at the implied urination.

Brother is passing the school snack to students. It is pineapple, which many have not tried before. Brother: It’s pretty good, right? Students nod and continue eating the unfamiliar fruit. Brother:There’s lots, if anyone wants to eat more. Students return for seconds, then many for thirds. As the children eat, the pineapple begins to tenderize their mouths. One girl sticks out her tongue and begins to touch it, wincing. Frightened child: My—my tongue hurts! A number of things happen simultaneously. Several other students also conclude they are hurt, dying, even. Yet another student screams out as two students run for the door. Take Action Children: Hold on! We’ll go get the principal! Sprinting for help, they almost escape before Brother is able to catch up, contain the breach, and calm the frightened students by persuading them to drink water. The Great Pineapple Crisis has been averted.

Let us now return to dumb and mean things kids say.

Child playing doctor during playtime: **approaches fellow child on tiny couch, places stethoscope on Patient Child, listens, and begins to panic as a diagnosis is made** Doctor Child: She has the contagious!

Big Treble in Little City, Conte pencil on paper. Artist: Señorita Sass

I am demonstrating an intentionally bad magic trick for Señorita Sassypants. I put my face in profile and pretend to pull a pencil out of my nose. Señorita Sassypants: You didn’t pull that out of your nose. There’s no boogers on it.

“You didn’t pull that out of your nose. There’s no boogers on it.”

Me: Rats! You got me. But check this out. I select a white crayon and twiddle it in my hands and slip it into my lap when SS’s concentration wavers. I drop it to the floor and it rolls under the table, where I put my foot over it. Me: It’s gone. Bam. Magic crayon. SS searches my hands and sleeves, finding nothing. She begins to search the floor, frustration building. She peers beneath the edge of my shoe and spots the crayon, which she seizes triumphantly and holds aloft, sneering. Me: Uh, it must have teleported! SS, drawing close to my face: No, you hid it there. This crayon isn’t magic. You’re not magic. **snaps crayon in half, tossing the fragments of wax and vaudeville showbiz dreams to the floor**

JajsKe, Ballpoint on Paper

Time for dinner: Platinum Edition

Inclusive Child: Do you know Cat? Me: The despicable animal? IC: No, my friend from church. Me, rolling with it: Oh, right. Our mutual friend, Cat. IC: You know Cat? Me: Yaaah. About yea tall **gestures about three feet in the air** likes running… and… pizza.” IC: Wow! You know Cat!

Inclusive Child, giving me the sideye: Are you a kid, or a dad? Me: I’m not a dad. IC: So… you’re a kid? ‘Cause you look like a dad. Me: …Yes? No! I’m not a dad, but I am an uncle. In fact, I have four– IC: An uncle? I—I thought you were a kid!

Señorita Sassypants peers in my ear while I sit criss-cross applesauce on the floor. Señorita Sassypants: The inside of your ears are disgusting. Me to me: I have just had my personal hygiene questioned by a child. I have never before felt so insecure.

elixir of life

2nd Grade Me, joking: Hey, look, it’s those purple glue sticks! Makes you kinda hungry, yeah? Child 1: Yeah. I haven’t had one in a while, though. They’re not bad. A little minty.

“Hey, look, it’s those purple glue sticks! Makes you kinda hungry, yeah?” “Yeah. I haven’t had one in a while, though. They’re not bad. A little minty.”

Me: Wait—I was just joking— Child 2: Yeah, minty is a good way to put it. But they sort of give you a headache. Child 1: Just a little one. Me: A headache. Do you… eat these often? Child 2: Not that much. Child 1: Like, not that much, I mean, I’ve only eaten them twice this school year. Child 2: Twice for me, too. Me: It’s barely October. Child 3, wandering over: Are we talking about eating glue? Me: You—you’ve also— Child 3: It’s pretty good. Kinda minty, but there might be little bit of a headache after. Me: …ohhkay then. Hours pass. All the students have left for the day. A purple glue stick sits temptingly on a semicircle table.The pursuit of knowledge and flavor beckons. It’s labeled nontoxic, after all… “Hey, that is minty!”

Then… the headache.

For more ridiculous school conversations, do check out the original Tales from the Trenches: Conversations of a Substitute Teacher. Then, go hug a teacher. And put money and chocolate syrup into their bag so they can have a good Monday.

Mercenary of Knowledge: More Conversations of a Substitute Teacher I've been picking up some financial slack between jobs and travels by working as a substitute teacher.

#crayon #elementary #existential #frustration #Funny #kindergarten #overheard #public school #school #stuff kids say #substitute teaching #teachers #teaching #work

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theretroperspective-blog · 7 years

Text

Let It B

Ah, the B-movie. It had been a source of entertainment for many a stood-up date or theater talk-back participant about as long as the genre has existed. But what IS a B-movie? We've all seen 'em ( and know almost instantly when we have), but what makes a film "B"? What does a movie need in order to be "B"? And what of the iconic B actor? Who chooses to have a career that, in its basest form, means 'sub-par'? B-ACK STORY B-movies (the term) first came about during Hollywood's Golden Age. The name was for movies meant for distribution as the less-publicized, bottom-half of a double feature. In the later '20's (27-28), during the final days of the silent era, the production cost of feature films from major studios averaged between $190'000 to $275'000. During the time when bigger budgeted films weren't being made, studios still had to pay for sound stages, actors they had on retainer, and hired crew. These studios would make low-budget (i.e. lower quality) flicks in order to make extra cash as well as continue to use their people (mostly to keep them from fleeing to other studios), and would sell these lower films alongside their major productions. In laymens' terms, a B-movie is much like the B-side of an album. (For my youngun's, albums are what music USED to come on. Questions at the bottom, please.) Basically these smaller, cheaper flicks got put into theaters to cover run times between bigger pictures. This then led to micro-budgeted studios creating their own B-movies to sell to the studios at cost (usually producing them at around $30'000 and recouping cost plus). All of this comes about, again, due to the end of the silent era. During that time films were preceded by live acts and a variety of short films and news reels. Once sound became law, those were mostly dropped, and in came cartoons and serials, which were followed by a double feature, the first being the B-film, mainly to draw more money from the viewer. But the major studios soon caught on, developing B-units to produce those less expensive films on-site, nearly killing the indie studios (until the indie-wave of the 70's, but that's another blog). With this came the game of BLOCK BOOKING; or, to get access to a studios' more profitable features, theaters would HAVE to also buy their B-movie in a double-feature set. Along with this insidious scheme came BLIND BOOKING, where theaters would have to take the B-movie sight-unseen. In this way studios were assured a good profit on the lower-grade flick, no matter how awful it might be. The innocent years of Hollywood folks! However, many B-movies were serials, with an actor continuing to play the same character in each, such as the 'Andy Hardy' films staring Mickey Rooney. MOVING ON While the original meaning of the term B-movie ended with the double-feature production ceasing in the 50's, the term is still used for films that don't quite meet A-level criteria. "B-movie" now brings connotations of lower-quality films - which isn't ALWAYS true... To quote Wiki: "In it's current usage, the term has somewhat contradictory connotations; it may signal an opinion that a certain movie is (a) a genre film with minimal artistic ambitions ("Sharknado"), or (b) a lively, energetic film uninhibited by the constraints imposed on more expensive projects and unburdened by the conventions of putatively 'serious' independent film ("Turbo Kid"). Or, in more basic terms: A B-movie is a low-budget commercial film that's NOT art house. The term is now also used for high-budgeted flicks with exploitation-style content (such as much of Tarantino's work). But much good has come from the B-movie genre! Some high profile directors like Jonathan Demme began with B-movies. And it's where many A-level actors got their starts. Recent Oscar winner Leonardo DiCaprio got his start in "Critters 3". "June Bug" star Amy Adams got through in "Cruel Intentions 2". And Charlize Theron didn't even have a line in "Children of the Corn 3 : Urban Harvest". And one of the more well known is Jennifer Aniston's turn in the cult classic (and where's my blog on those?) "Leprechaun". And neat-o, there's my segway! BACTORS Both John Wayne and Jack Nicholsen got their start in B-movies, too. As well as our former president Ronald Reagan, who was a B-movie star before he ran our country. But there are MANY actors who are known simply for their B-movie work alone. Here's a list of them (in no order other than as I remember them). PJ SOLES: I know her from the 1979 "Rock 'n' Roll Highschool", about a young girl who idolized one of the world's greatest bands, the Ramones; but she also played the tomboy menace Norma in "Carrie", and doomed-to-die friend Lynda in "Halloween". CRISPIN GLOVER: He became a Hollywood staple, and Lorraine's 'density' in "Back to the Future" as George McFly, and recently was the Red Knave in Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland", but Glover got his start way back in 81 in a TV movie called "Best of Times", and as the star of the cult hit "Willard". MEG FOSTER: She was a woman looking for love - round 2 - in "The Step Father 2", and played 'Holly' in "They Live" alongside Rowdy Piper, but is most recognized portraying Evil-Lyn in the live-action He-Man movie, "Masters of the Universe". CLINT HOWARD: The brother of director Ron Howard, Clint began as a child actor, but has continued with films like "The Ice-Scream Man", "The Fun House Massacre", and "Nobody Gets Out Alive". TOM SAVINI: Tom was originally a SFX creator for "Friday the 13th", but he's also had quite the acting career in films like "Creep Show 2", "From Dusk 'till Dawn", and "The Perks of Being a Wallflower". BRAD DOURIF: He's now a part of the "Lord of the Rings" legacy since playing Wormtongue in "The Two Towers", but he's always been well known by voice, if not face, as Chuckey in every single "Child's Play" film in the franchise. He also stared alongside Jack Nicholsen in "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest". MICHAEL IRONSIDE: Most recently he portrayed the zealot Zeus in the fantastic "Turbo Kid", but Ironside's been working since the 70's, including "Scanners", "The Hitchhiker", and a personal favorite, the TV show "Sea Quest". CHRISTOPHER LAMBERT: The one and only true 'Highlander', Lambert's also known for playing Lord Rayden in the live-action version of "Mortal Kombat". CLANCY BROWN: I first spotted him in "Highlander" as well, playing psychopath Victor Kruger, but Brown's gone on to have a formidable career on-screen as well as with voice work, playing Lex Luthor in the animated "Superman" series. But I also knew him as Drew's step-dad Gus from "Pet Semetary 2". BRUCE CAMPBELL: Probably the most recognized B-movie actor of all time, Campbell started in the "Evil Dead" series, and has continued being our hero in shows like "Burn Notice" and "Ash VS. the Evil Dead". This might be where I'd say "All hail the king, baby!", but you get what I'm saying. Moving on. BUT THEY'RE A TO US 'We all have different opinions' blah-blah, 'they're like assholes' yadda-yadda. But there have been B-movies that have, through that grand test of time, been elevated to A-level status by their fans. Usually they're referred to as 'Cult Classics', but we all know we'd watch them in leu of some of the newer, block-busting behemoths of today, given the choice. Maybe it's because of previously stated stars, maybe it's the special effects, or maybe they're just so off the beaten path that we just can't help but fall in love with their weirdness. So here are some of the best - no real order, and nowhere close to the total list. THE EVIL DEAD SERIES There's lots of arguments over whether the original film "Evil Dead" should be included, but Sam Rami's occult trilogy is deeply beloved. From the supreme low-budget gore to Bruce Campbell's chin, this series holds one of the highest Rotten Tomatoes scores on the site, even beating out it's recent remake. Eat it, Dead-its! IRON SKY What IS it with Nazi's?? Why do we like watching them die so damn much? Think it was the genocide? Pretty sure it was the genocide. What-ever, this film's premise is enough. Nazi's waiting on the dark side of the moon to launch a final attack on Earth. Wow. I'm pretty certain I know THAT'S how the funding came through. DEATH BED: THE BED THAT EATS I don't know a film fan that hasn't seen this movie. Its premise is its title. It's a bed. It eats people. SHARKNADO There's FOUR of these fucking movies. No wait, FIVE. I don't get it, but it hit a large enough portion of viewers. Welcome back, Tara Reid. THE BLOB Classic (in general and actual terms) B-movie fare. A gigantic blob that consumes everything in its way. First appearing in the 50's with a young Steve McQueen, it got remade in the 80's and is supposedly being remade again. ATTACK OF THE KILLER TOMATOES So, mutant tomatoes decide to start eating us. Vegetarians in the 70's were shaking in their faux suede shoes, I'm sure. BASKET CASE Oh man, do I love this one. A man is born with a homicidal deformed Siamese twin that gets detached via surgery, so the two brothers decide to go after those that separated them. And the deformed one gets carried around in a basket. GET IT?!?! POULTRYGEIST:NIGHT OF THE CHICKEN DEAD Full disclosure - I know one of the SFX guys who worked on this Troma feature. Just look for the talking shit sandwich. BEASTMASTER A guy who can talk to animals goes after a power hungry war lord who sacrifices children. And man-bats. TROLL 2 The best- worst movie ever made. But sadly, no trolls. Just goblins. Please go check some of these films out. PLEASE. You're just hating yourself if you don't. So B-movies live on, as they should. Because we all need to be reminded of what a mediocre world we really live in.

#b-movies #film #education #fun.

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